#julien x phoebe

[beaujester]

favorite salt in the wound finales (in no particular order) rock en seine, france - august 25th (x)

[girlkisser13]

cool about it

"but i'm trying to forget about it" "feeling like i'm breaking a sweat about it" "wishing you would kindly get out of my head about it" "telling myself one day i'll forget about it" "knowing that it probably isn't true"

pairings: leo valdez x fem!reader

warnings/tags: fluff with a hint of angst. best friend leo.

summary: "if you even feel half the way i do about you..."

leo had always been good at fixing things. mending broken gadgets and constructing new inventions from mere scraps was second nature to him. but right now, as the morning sun filtered through the windows of cabin 9, casting long shadows on his half-finished projects, leo was wrestling with something he couldn’t fix, couldn’t build, couldn’t even figure out.

he hadn’t slept. not even a wink. his eyes stung from staying up, but that wasn’t the worst part. the worst part was that every time he closed his eyes, he could see last night. the faint glow of the fire in bunker 9. the hum of his latest invention. and then you, standing in front of him, close enough to touch, holding a plate of food with a worried look in your eyes because he’d skipped dinner. again.

his fingers drummed against the workbench, trying to distract himself. anything to take his mind off the kiss. that kiss. he couldn’t stop replaying it. the way you’d looked at him, concerned and sweet. how he’d leaned in, almost as if pulled by some invisible force, his lips meeting yours without a second thought. it had been quick, just a soft press, but it was enough to set his heart racing. and when he pulled away, your sibling had come looking for you, breaking the moment, and leo had been left standing there, dazed, as you were dragged away to help with some urgent task.

now, as the sunlight crept into the corners of the cabin, leo wished he could just flip a switch in his brain and shut down these thoughts. maybe you’d been surprised. maybe you’d wanted him to kiss you. or maybe— more likely— you hadn’t. maybe you were just being nice, and he’d gone and made everything awkward. the more he thought about it, the more he convinced himself that it was the latter. you were probably just being a good friend, and he’d ruined everything.

"idiot," he muttered to himself, raking a hand through his curly hair. "she’s your best friend. what were you thinking?"

he grabbed a wrench and turned back to his project, something half-finished that looked like a mechanical bird. he tightened a few bolts, but his thoughts kept wandering back to you. he had to talk to you. he had to apologize before this thing went any further, before he lost you for good. he took a deep breath, wiped his hands on his jeans, and scribbled a quick note on a piece of scrap paper.

meet me at bunker 9. please? –leo

at breakfast, he spotted you sitting with your siblings. you were laughing at something one of them said, looking completely normal, as if nothing had happened. as if he hadn’t kissed you. his heart pounded as he walked past your table and slipped the note into your hand. you looked up, surprised, but he was already turning away, heading for the door.

you showed up at bunker 9 about an hour later. he was waiting, nervously pacing back and forth. when he saw you step through the door, he stopped and stood there, unsure of how to begin. you looked as calm and collected as ever, but leo knew you well enough to see the flicker of uncertainty in your eyes.

"you wanted to see me?" you asked, closing the door behind you. the bunker was quiet except for the soft whir of a cooling fan and the faint crackling of his project on the workbench.

he opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out. he swallowed, his throat suddenly dry. "yeah, i… i wanted to talk to you about last night," he finally managed. "i, uh… i’m really sorry. for kissing you, i mean. i wasn’t thinking. i know you probably didn’t want that, and… i just… i’m sorry."

your expression didn’t change, but he could see your hands tense slightly at your sides. he felt his heart sink. of course. you were going to tell him that it was a mistake, that he’d crossed a line.

"leo," you said softly. "it’s okay. i think we just got caught up in the moment. you were tired, and i probably looked like i needed kissing or something."

his stomach twisted. "so, you don’t…" he trailed off, unsure how to finish that sentence.

you offered a small smile. "leo, you had been working all day. it’s not surprising if you were feeling a little out of it."

he nodded, his heart heavy. he knew you were letting him down gently, trying to keep the peace. that was just like you. always thinking of others, even when it hurt.

a silence stretched between you, awkward and heavy. you shifted slightly, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. "is that all you wanted to talk to me about?" you asked, your voice sounding casual. but he could hear the faint trace of hope in your tone, and it almost broke his heart. you wanted him to say more, to give you some reason to stay. but he couldn’t do that. not when he was sure he’d already messed everything up.

"yeah," he said, forcing himself to nod. "that’s all. i just… i know you have a lot to do with it being cabin inspection day and all. you should probably go."

you hesitated, looking like you wanted to say something, but then you nodded. "right. i should get going." you turned to leave, and he watched you walk away, his heart aching with each step you took.

and then, just as you reached the door, he couldn’t hold it in anymore. "wait!" he called out, rushing forward. you stopped, turning back to face him, your eyes wide with surprise.

he grabbed your hand, pulling you back toward him. before he could talk himself out of it, he leaned in and kissed you again. this time, it wasn’t a mistake. it wasn’t some impulsive action he couldn’t control. this time, he knew exactly what he was doing. he felt you tense for a second, then relax against him, your hands resting on his shoulders.

when he pulled away, he kept his face close to yours, his forehead touching yours. "i meant it," he whispered, his voice shaky. "i meant to kiss you. both times."

you looked up at him, searching his eyes. "what?"

he took a deep breath, his heart pounding. "i’ve been trying to be cool about it, you know? i’ve tried to act like it’s not a big deal, like it’s just whatever, but it is. i haven’t been able to get that kiss out of my head. i can’t stop thinking about you, about us. i know it’s stupid, and i know i should just let it go, but… i can’t."

you felt your heart racing at his words, still processing everything he was saying. you searched his eyes for clarity. "leo, what are you saying?"

he took a deep breath, his heart pounding. "i'm saying that i’ve been in love with you since... i don't know. since forever, i guess. since pretty much the moment i saw you. you're the best friend i've ever had, and i know i don't deserve you, but... if you even feel half the way that i do..."

you were silent for a moment, and his heart sank. he was about to pull away, to let you go and tell you it was okay if you didn’t feel the same. but then you spoke.

"i don’t," you said, and his world stopped. he felt like he was falling, everything crashing down around him.

but then you smiled, a soft, shy smile that made his heart skip a beat. "i don’t feel half the way you do, leo," you continued, your voice trembling. "i feel it ten times more."

his eyes widened, hope flooding through him. "you… you mean that?"

you nodded. "i mean it, leo. i've been in love with you for so long, but i never thought you’d feel the same way."

he laughed, the sound full of relief and joy. "gods, we’re a couple of idiots, aren’t we?"

you laughed too, and his heart soared at the sound. he pulled you into his arms, holding you close, his head resting on top of yours. he could feel your heartbeat against his chest, strong and steady, matching his own.

"i’m still sorry for last night," he murmured into your hair. "not for kissing you, but for not saying this sooner."

you pulled back, looking up at him with a smile. "well, you’re saying it now. that’s what matters."

he grinned, his heart feeling lighter than it had in years. he kissed you again, and this time, he knew it wasn’t a mistake. this time, it was real.

[bonm4ti]

( - by request - ) ( PART2 )

- Your camera roll if you were dating Julien Baker 🎸

[gingerjolover]

is the fandom still alive?? sorry y’all, mama has been going THRU it!

i HATE my job, trying to find a new one that gives me more work life balance bc i have barely had time to write :(

i really want to start posting again, even if it’s only once a week, but it’s so hard when i’m tired all the time

also i’m getting tested for autism because you’re girl has been having some…meltdowns at work

and they don’t give me any medical accommodations :(

anyways! if you sent a request recently OR there’s something that you really want me to continue, please please PLEASE put it at the top of my inbox!!!!

[outofmydepthatapublicbeach]

jb in highschool!!! she looked like such a sweetheart omg

[honeys-hotties]

I Don't Deserve You-Julien Baker x Reader

my first julien baker fic, because the jb brainrot is SO REAL i love her with my whole heart

jb x fem!reader

angst but happy ending (have i ever written anything without angst??) anyways! as always, this is all made up!! jb is a little mean in this one, and in real life i am so sure she would never act like this

word cout: 2222 <3

After a horrifically unproductive day at the studio, all Julien wants to do when she gets back to her house is sleep for approximately 17 hours. The clock on the wall reads 6:13 when she drops her jacket on the couch, completely forgetting about the dirty breakfast dishes she had promised you she would clean up that morning. You had an obnoxiously early start that morning, but wanting to see you before you left for work, Julien had woken up and you two had made breakfast together.

“I’m so sorry I don’t have time to clean everything up,” you had whispered apologetically, perched atop the counter while Julien stood between your legs. “If you could put everything away before you go to the studio for me please baby? And I can make us dinner tonight? I shouldn’t be too late? I think they were saying 7:00 wrap tonight? So I’ll be home by 7:45 at the latest.” Julien had agreed, if mostly to quiet her excited girlfriend so she could get a few kisses in before you left, but had gone back upstairs and fallen asleep after you were gone. She had slept through her alarm, and in her panic to get to the studio on time had forgotten to clean the kitchen.

Julien walked up the stairs, pushing the door to their bedroom open and falling face-first onto the large, unmade bed, and immediately passing out. She sleeps peacefully for about an hour and a half, until the slamming of the front door startles her awake. Rubbing her eyes irritatedly, Julien sits up in the darkened bedroom, a headache growing behind her eyes. 

“Babe?” She hears you call from downstairs. “Where are you?” Grumbling to herself, Julien sits up and stretches, her back popping from the movements. You pad up the stairs, and poke your head into the bedroom, smiling at the sight of your tired girlfriend. “Good nap?” you ask softly, walking towards the bed and sitting down next to Julien, who wraps her arms around her girlfriend’s waist, resting her head in your lap.

“Yeah, baby.” Julien hums. “Really good nap.”

You laugh softly, stroking Julien’s hair in your lap. “I’m glad, babe. You’ve been working yourself to death recently. How was the studio today?”

Julien rolls her eyes, sitting up abruptly. “I really don’t want to talk about work right now.” She says, irritated. Your eyes widen slightly, shocked by your girlfriend’s sharp tone, but ultimately chalking it up to her exhaustion. “Oh, okay. I’m sorry, Jules. I can go start dinner, if you want to nap a little longer?”

Julien looks at you guiltily. “I’m sorry, princess.” She pulls you into her lap, kissing your forehead repeatedly. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to snap at you. I love you.” You laugh quietly, relishing in the comfort of Julien’s arms, the kisses being pressed to your face. 

“It’s okay baby. I get it. Want to come start on dinner with me?” 

Julien nods, and follows like a puppy after you, down the stairs and into the kitchen. Julien is so lost in thought that when you stop abruptly in front of her at the sight of the kitchen, Julien smacks directly into you, knocking you forward a couple of steps. 

“Whoa princess, what’re you doin’?” She asks, reaching out to steady you. You swat her hands away, turning to face Julien with an unamused expression on your face. “Hey,” Julien takes a step back. “I’m sorry baby, I didn’t mean to bump into you, I swear, I just wasn’t expecting you to stop there…” she trails off at the look on your face. “What?”

“The kitchen, JB.” You say, gesturing to the dirty dishes behind you. “You promised you would clean up this morning, remember? I specifically asked if you could take care of it this morning so it wouldn’t be a problem tonight, and you told me not to worry, that you would clean up before you left.”

Julien rolls her eyes, her girlfriend’s irritation only adding to her bad mood. “Seriously, babe? You barely see me all day, and now you’re getting mad because I didn’t do the dishes? So I wanted to get some extra sleep this morning? Don’t you think I fuckin’ deserve it? I work so damn hard, I deserve a break, and having you flipping out on me isn’t helpful, baby.” Her tone is biting, her words harsh, and she barely notices the tears glazing over her girlfriend’s eyes. 

“I work hard too, Julien!” You grit out. “Just because I’m not some incredible singer doesn’t mean I don’t work hard, doesn’t mean I’m not exhausted when I get home. You told me you would clean up and you didn’t, I don’t understand why you’re getting so defensive-”

“Exactly!” Julien yells. “You don’t understand. You have no idea what it’s like to have this pressure on your shoulders every goddamn second, the eyes of so many people, waiting for you to fuck up. But guess fucking what, princess? The world doesn’t revolve around you.” She stalks closer to you, her voice loud. “You have no idea what I’m dealing with, how exhausted I am constantly, how hard I’m working. So I forgot to do the dishes once? So what? Look at everything I do for you, everything I bring to the table, versus you, and then try to tell me off again, princess.” As soon as the words leave her mouth, Julien wishes she could take them back. You look like you’ve been slapped across the face, and the unshed tears in your eyes finally begin to fall. You let out a choked sob, backing away from Julien who, in her anger, had cornered you against the table. 

“Wait, baby…I didn’t…” but it’s too late. The damage is done. 

“You’re right, Julien,” You manage. “I don’t know what it’s like. Maybe you should find someone who understands you, because obviously I never could.”

“No, princess, please-” Julien starts, before you cut her off.

“Don’t fucking call me that.” You snap. “I’m not your ‘princess’, I’m not your ‘baby’, I’m not your ‘doll’, I’m not anything to you, apparently.”

“No, please. You’re everything to me, I swear, I was just being mean because I’m tired, please, I didn’t mean it” Julien’s eyes fill with tears. You turn away from her. “I think you should leave, Julien. Before you say something else you ‘don’t mean’”. 

“No, please, you know I can’t leave when we’re fighting, we have to fix things, please let me fix things.”

You turn to her, tears streaming down your face. “I don’t know if you can fix this, Julien. I’ve put up with a lot of your shit, when you snap at me because you’ve had long days at the studio and I let it slide, when you chainsmoke because you’re stressed and I hold my tongue because I don’t want to make you more upset, when you make my problems feel small because I’m not part of some huge band. I don’t know if I can do this anymore. It’s not fair to me.”

Julien drops to her knees in front of you, reaching gently for your hands. “Please let me fix this” she cries softly. “Please, my love. I will do anything to make it up to you. Anything.” You pull your hands from Julien’s grasp. 

“I’m going to bed” you say, brokenly. “Just, wash the dishes, please.” 

“I love you” Julien calls out after you, watching you retreat up the stairs. “Baby, I-I love you.” You say nothing, and as soon as you disappear up the stairs, Julien breaks down in tears. She sits on the kitchen floor and cries, cries because she thinks she might have just ruined the best thing in her life. Julien cries for what feels like either ten minutes or ten hours, until she has no tears left and her sobs turn into pathetic sniffles. Eventually, she stands up and finds her phone, calling the only two people she trusts to help her fix her relationship. Phoebe and Lucy both pick up almost immediately, and listen dutifully as Julien fills them in on the fight while she tries to tidy up the kitchen. 

“Wow” Phoebe manages when Julien finishes the story. “Julien, fuck, I don’t know what to say.”

“I do,” Lucy chimes in. “You fucked up. Big time. Like, I don’t even know how you fucked up this badly.”

“That’s really helpful, Luce.” Julien retorts. “Now, how do I fix things? She’s the best thing in my life, and I can’t do this without her.”

“I think you and her need to have a really serious conversation about your relationship and what she expects of you” Phoebe says seriously. “It sounds like you’ve been neglecting her, however unintentionally, taking her for granted. She’s put up with it for long enough, JB, and honestly, she deserves better. I love you and I’m here for you no matter what, but you’re in the wrong here, babe.”

“You guys will work it out, but just try to understand where she’s coming from. You’ve got a pretty short fuse when you’re stressed,” Lucy adds. “I know you both and I know how much love you have for each other. Just, talk things through with her, see it from her point of view.”

“Okay. I’ll try. And you’re right, she deserves better. I’ll do my best to try harder for her, to be more attentive and more patient for her. I love her so much.”

“We know,” Lucy says. “We love you both so much, and I know you two will work it out. It’s hard right now, but you’re going to come out on the other side of this so much stronger as a couple.”

“Tell her we say hi, and call us tomorrow with updates, okay JB. We love you.” Phoebe says, bringing a small smile to Julien’s face.

“I will. Thank you guys, I love you both so much.” Julien disconnects the call and wipes down the counter, before turning off the kitchen lights and heading upstairs. Her footsteps grow soft as she reaches the door to your shared bedroom, and she pushes the door open softly, her heart breaking at the sight of you curled up on the bed, eyes red and puffy. 

“I don’t want to talk right now, Julien.” You say quietly, your voice raspy. 

“Will you listen then, baby? Just, I have a few things I want to say to you, to apologize for, and then you can kick me out, okay?” Julien asks hopefully, walking slowly towards the bed. You sit up wordlessly, gesturing for Julien to go ahead.

“Um, okay. Here goes. Baby, I’m so, so fucking sorry. I don’t know what came over me. I’ve been so tired and stressed lately. And I know that’s not an excuse. I just want to tell you where I’m coming from. That gives me zero right to take it out on you, though. And I’m so sorry because through everything, you’ve been here for me. You’ve stuck with me, through good and bad, no matter what. And I’ve been taking you for granted, which is so unfair to you, and you deserve so much better than me. You deserve someone who listens to you and values your opinions, someone who loves you so much they can’t stand the thought of life without you. Someone who knows how hard you work, someone who is always there for you, someone who is patient and protective and treats you like a queen. I want to be that person for you, if you’ll let me. I want to show you how incredible you are and tell you every day for the rest of our lives how much I adore you. I can’t imagine my life without you. I don’t want to imagine my life without you. I know I don’t deserve you, but please, give me another chance. You make my life worth living, you make everything better. I love you more than I can ever say, but if you want me, I will spend the rest of our lives proving how much I love you.” By the end of her speech, you're sobbing. 

“Oh, fuck, baby, doll, I’m so sorry, I-”

“Shut up and kiss me” You cut her off, and Julien’s eyes widen at your statement. “I, what?”

“You heard me,” you laughed, your throat still choked with tears. “Kiss me, Julien.” Without hesitating, Julien surges forward and connects your lips in a searing kiss. She can taste the salt of your tears mixing with her own, and when she finally breaks away, she rests her forehead against yours, gently wiping your tears away.  “I love you” she whispers. “And I don’t deserve you. But I love you so much. And I’m sorry.”

“I know you are,” you say. “But I don’t want to talk about that right now. I’m tired. Let’s go to sleep, we can talk more in the morning.”

Julien presses her lips to yours once more. “You’re the boss, princess. I’ll start making it up to you first thing tomorrow.”

“You better.” You say, letting out a watery chuckle, cuddling into her. “And I have a few ideas for how you can start.”

honey's notes: to anyone reading this right now, i love you you're amazing, all the forehead kisses in the world for you! this fic was so fun to write, lmk if i should write more for jb or the boys!

love always, honey

[superstarcherrycolagirl]

my masterlist!

requests are open!! but here is what i've written recently

i write mainly fluff/angsty stuff (and potentially smut PLS send ideas) BUT WITH THAT if you are a minor dni!!

check out my about me post to see who else i can write for! then send me a request here!

smut = **

Benny Cross

rocking red

written "mine" on my upper thigh

i might as well be drunk in love

taken care of

we'll be alright

piece of you in how i dress

pretty in pink - moodboard

Julien Baker

you're losing me

Johnny Davis

sent from above

Kathy Cross

i told you so

Coriolanus Snow

it was maroon

hands**

pure as the driven snow - moodboard

[princess5anna]

she looks like a fucking renaissance painting god save me

pic credits: me :)

[serqphites]

made this really quick for no reason, thought they were cute 🤷‍♀️ enjoy this while i work through my julien asks <3

feel free to send any for people other than julien! don’t get me wrong i love her so much but i feel like the other gays don’t get enough love 💞

[lucdacuslady]

your instagram story if you were dating julien baker

original idea from @boywithpinkcarnation thanks c!!

[beaujester]

favorite salt in the wound finales (in no particular order) the mann center, philadelphia - september 30th (x)

+ bonus lucy and phoebe kissing like Het Girls 😭 (x)

[girlkisser13]

emily i’m sorry

"emily, forgive me, can we" "make it up as we go along?" "i'm twenty-seven and i don't know who i am" "but i know what i want"

pairings: emily prentiss x fem!reader

warnings/tags: angst with a bit of fluff at the end.

summary: you and emily find your way to each other.

returning to quantico was like stepping into a time capsule. the bau had always been a place of intensity, where minds were stretched to their limits and where you had once spent countless hours. but this time, walking through those familiar halls, you felt a different kind of pressure— the weight of seeing emily again after so many years apart.

the past had a way of creeping up on you, especially in a place like this, where every corner held memories. you had loved emily once, more than you thought possible. but in your pursuit of a career that demanded everything, you had made the impossible decision to walk away. it was mutual, or at least that’s what you both said at the time. there were no harsh words, no accusations— just two people who had to part ways for the sake of their futures.

yet standing here now, you couldn’t help but question that choice.

as you made your way into the bullpen, you were greeted by the team— a group of people you knew by reputation but had never worked with before. penelope garcia was the first to spot you, her eyes lighting up as she made her way over.

"you must be the new liaison!" she exclaimed, her voice as bright as her personality. "i’m penelope garcia, resident genius, and lover of all things tech."

you smiled, accepting the warm handshake. "y/n l/n, nice to meet you, garcia."

"please, call me penelope. we’re all friends here," she said with a wink before turning to the rest of the team. "everyone, meet our new liaison."

you exchanged handshakes and introductions with david rossi, spencer reid, aaron hotchner, and derek morgan. they were all friendly, professional, and welcoming. none of them knew your history with emily, and you weren’t sure if that made things easier or harder.

"prentiss is in her office," rossi mentioned, almost casually. "she’s probably buried in paperwork."

you nodded, trying to keep your expression neutral. "i’ll go introduce myself."

the walk to emily’s office felt longer than it should have, each step heavy with anticipation. you took a deep breath before knocking on the door, trying to steady your nerves.

"come in," came emily’s voice, slightly muffled by the door.

you pushed the door open and stepped inside, your heart skipping a beat as your eyes met hers. emily looked almost exactly as you remembered— poised, strong, with that keen, intelligent gaze that had always drawn you in. but when she saw you, her eyes widened in shock, and she froze, the file she was holding slipping from her fingers and landing on the desk.

"y/n?" her voice was soft, almost disbelieving.

"hey, emily," you said, your voice betraying a hint of the nervousness you felt. "it’s been a while."

she stared at you for a moment, as if trying to convince herself that you were really there. finally, she found her voice. "i didn’t know you were coming back."

"i’m the new liaison,” you explained, stepping further into the office. "i just met the team."

emily blinked, clearly trying to process this new information. "you’re taking jj’s position?"

"yeah," you confirmed. "it feels right. like coming home, in a way."

a long, tense silence stretched between you. the last time you had seen emily, you both had agreed to part ways. you needed to focus on your career, and she had understood. but standing here now, all those old feelings resurfaced, and you realized how much you had missed her.

"i didn’t think i’d see you again," emily finally said, her voice low and laced with emotion.

"neither did i," you admitted. "but life has a funny way of bringing you back to the things you thought you’d left behind."

emily studied you, her expression unreadable. "why did you come back?"

her question was simple, but it hit you like a ton of bricks. you had thought about this moment, about what you would say if you ever saw her again. now that it was here, the words felt heavy in your mouth.

"emily, i’m sorry," you began, your voice cracking slightly. "when we broke up, i thought i was doing the right thing. i thought i needed to focus on my career, and i convinced myself that it was for the best."

she listened, her eyes never leaving yours, but she didn’t say anything.

"i thought i was making the right choice," you continued, your voice filled with regret. "but after all this time, after everything i’ve done, i still don’t know who i am. the only thing i’m sure of is that i still love you. i never stopped."

emily looked down, her expression softening. "you left," she whispered, her voice carrying a weight of hurt. "you chose your career over us."

"i know," you replied, feeling a lump form in your throat. "and i'm sorry for that, more than you can imagine. i thought i was making the right choice, but i was wrong. i've spent all this time trying to figure out who i am, but the only thing i'm sure of is that i still love you."

her breath hitched slightly, and she finally looked up at you, her eyes shimmering with unshed tears. "you broke my heart, y/n," she said, her voice trembling.

"i know," you whispered, taking a cautious step closer. "and i’ll do whatever it takes to make it up to you, if you’ll let me."

for a long moment, emily just looked at you, as if weighing your words. then, slowly, she stepped forward and pulled you into a tight embrace. the warmth of her arms around you, the familiar scent of her hair, it all came rushing back, and you held her close, never wanting to let go.

"i missed you," she murmured against your shoulder, her voice thick with emotion.

"i missed you too," you whispered back, relief flooding through you. "i’m not going anywhere this time, emily. i promise."

she pulled back slightly, just enough to look into your eyes. there was a hint of a smile on her lips, a glimmer of hope in her gaze.

"maybe we could… start over?" she suggested tentatively.

you smiled, your heart feeling lighter than it had in years. "i’d like that."

as you stood there, holding each other, you knew that this was where you were meant to be. not just in the bau, but with emily, in her arms, where you’d always belonged.

and this time, you weren’t going to let her go.

[dumblilb]

Me @ Ellie Williams

[aviscarrentals]

straight people need to stop feeling so comfortable saying shit like "omg fans of [insert queer musician with an almost entirely queer audience here] are so annoying 😒😒"

it's literally just a way to call openly lgbtq+ people who don't hide who they are annoying like just say you're homophobic

[outofmydepthatapublicbeach]

Maybe like a fic where you and Julien like agreed to keep it casual but like both of you want it to mean more

jj chats: hi love!!! this one took me a while and i apoligize!! i just couldn't think of a good way to write it but i think i figured it out!!

warnings: RPF, use of y/n, reader is a musician/famous, kissing, pet names

feedback is encouraged and i'd love to get some just please be kind!!!

You’re sitting around Lucy’s round dinner table, plates dirty but yet to be cleaned up. The table is filled with friends, clockwise it goes: Lucy, Naomi, you, Katie, Jo, Phoebe, and Julien. Across you was Julien, who was sipping on her lemonade. Your eyes couldn’t help but linger on her, even when she wasn’t speaking. You knew it was wrong, she wasn’t yours, you weren’t hers. But your heart was confused, and you always did want what you couldn’t have.

The conversation around you was lively, you could distinctly hear Phoebe’s howls over a joke Katie told. But you honestly couldn’t be bothered to listen. Your mind replays a moment you and Julien shared earlier in the day.

It had been early, the clock read 6:00 A.M. as you turned to the left side of the bed. Face to face with the woman who kept your heart pumping. You smiled at her as she lifted a hand to your face. You felt sparks fly as her gentle fingers brushed over your cheek. “Good morning darling,” she spoke, hand moving across your waist, pulling your body into hers.

“‘Morning Jules,” you yawned. “How’d you sleep?”

She smiled lazily, rubbing circles onto your hips “Good, especially since you were here.”

Her comment struck you wrong, reminded you that this was all a charade, that it meant nothing to her (or so you thought) “Don’t.”

Julien furrowed her brow, “Don’t what?”

You started to pull from her “Jules c’mon! Don’t say stuff like that!”

“What do you mean?”

You sighed frustratedly, “Like couplely stuff!” You threw your hands in the air, then fell back down to the bed with a slap, “We’re not together, you make that abundantly clear when we’re with our friends!” Julien’s face dropped at that, your words hurt for a reason you didn’t know yet.

“(Y/N) wait!” Julien went to grab your arms as you slid out of bed.

“Julien, please don’t. Just let me leave. It's nice until morning right?” You sigh, tired of this constant pain of never being feeling like you were enough.

You began to get up to collect your things and leave while Julien did nothing to stop you. You walked to where your jacket sat on the back of a chair, and pulled on your Converse. You located your phone and key. You were ready to walk out the door until you heard your name.

You turned around to spot Julien making her way to you. “Wait, just a minute, please?” Her eyes pleading. You gave in, just standing in her presence waiting for her to do something- do anything. You had spent months waiting for her to do something, something to convince you that these feelings you held for her were okay, that maybe they could be reciprocated.

Julien simply stood, staring into your eyes, as if taking in every engravement in your irises, surely she had to have seen the way your pupils dilated around her? How your cheeks flushed at the mention of her name. She leaned in, hand on your cheek and pulled you in for a kiss. It left you breathless and when you pulled away you immediately left.

Your mind was warped with questions.

Your mind was full of questions, memories of Julien’s hands on you, the way her lips felt-

You finally came back to reality after you felt Phoebe kicking your leg under the table. “Earth to (Y/N)?”

You shook your head, turning to face the platinum blond “Hmm?”

“Thought we lost you there for a few minutes,” Phoebe playful punched your shoulder. As you glanced around the table you realized everyone was staring at you. Your cheeks flushed as you grabbed your drink, sticking the straw in your mouth and chewing slightly. You noticed Julien staring at you, her eyebrow turned upwards.

“What were you thinking about babe?” Katie asked, smiling at you.

You started to reply, “Nothing-”

Until you were cut off by Phoebe again, “OMG!!! Or who were you thinking about!”

With that, your eyes widened and you furiously shook your head, “Nobody! I was just zoning out!”

Lucy chimed in, “Honey, we all see the way you’ve been glowing recently!! Did you find someone?”

Jo interjected, “You have to tell us who's the lucky lady!”

“There’s no lucky lady! I just zoned out!” You looked across the table, unimpressed looks were on everyone’s faces, except Julien's. She stared at you again, like she had in the morning. Only this time it seemed like she wasn’t trying to read it, more like she was understanding you. You could tell when her brows unfurrowed and she tilted her head at you.

“Whatever you say,” Phoebe sighed. Then leaning towards you she whispered “I will find this person.” then she plastered the sweetest smile on her face.

You jokingly rolled your eyes at her before saying “Whatever you say Pheebs!” Once the normal conversation started up again you stood up, grabbed your plate, and walked around the table into the kitchen. You stood at the sink, rinsing the plates off with hot water.

You heard footsteps approach you from behind and say a plate placed on the counter next to the sink. You recognized the hand immediately and in an instant, you turned around, face to face with Julien. It seemed today that her thing was to stare at you in silence because for a minute no words were exchanged between the two of you.

Finally, after minutes of hesitation, you spoke, “Julien-”

“(Y/N)-” Julien had had the same idea as you. She motioned for you to continue speaking so speak is what you did.

“Julien, I don’t think I can keep doing this with you.”

The tattooed woman had not expected that from you, her face contorted into a look that you could only describe as horror as she frantically asked “What? Why? What-what do you mean?”

You sighed, “I can’t keep sneaking around with you, I can’t keep pretending that I don’t-” You trailed off, nervous to tell her how you truly felt.

“‘-That you don’t?” Julien asked, wanting to hear your full truth.

Finally, you mustered up the courage to just say it. “That I don’t have feelings for you. Because I do.”

Julien continued to look at you, the gears in her head racing a mile a minute.

You began to step away, ready to leave her standing in the kitchen when she grabbed your arm, pulled you close to her, and simply smiled before saying. “I feel the exact same way.”

“You do?”

“Mhm, I don’t want to keep it casual with you anymore. I want you, fully.” As Julien looked into your eyes now it almost seemed that her words conveyed that. Like she did see you fully see you truly.

And suddenly it was like you two were the only two in the whole world as you started to lean in towards her. The act was like muscle memory, your head tilted left, hers right. It was engraved into your brain. The only difference was that this time you were not blocked off by my tinted car windows, or a hotel door. The only thing that separated you from the outside world was a wall with a fairly large door cut out in it.

As your lips connected it felt different this time, the experience no longer felt foreign, it felt like home. Her lips were warm and velvety, and even though you had tasted them a thousand times, this kiss was different in a million ways. It was filled with vigor, passion, and a newfound sense of hope- like this was something that would stick, not something that would simply fade away.

Until you remembered the world was just a few steps away when a large gasp brought you to your senses. Julien and you turned around, face to face with Phoebe and Jo, who held huge grins on their faces.

As yours and Julien’s cheeks flushed Phoebe giggled and joked “Told you I’d find out who you were thinking of (Y/N)!” She and Jo ran back into the dining room, no doubt telling the whole room what they had just seen.

You turned to Julien and signed, “You think we can make a run for it?”

Julien's hands rubbed up and down your arms, soothing you. She leaned in for a quick peck and replied, “Not a chance.”

[honeys-hotties]

ok this is kinda specific but can I request a julien fic where she's not sure if the reader is into girls and they're all out and a random guy hits on the reader and jb pretends to be her gf to get the reader away from him. and the reader plays along and kisses jb so she gets her confirmation and then they just confess their feelings ugh 🥰🥰🥰

i love this request!!! sorry it took me sooo long my loves, i've been absolutely overwhelmed with everything recently, but this one has been in the works for a bit and i'm so excited to get it out!!

My Type-Julien Baker x Reader

julien baker x fem!reader, sorta angsty? but happy ending (of course!) not proofread so i'm so sorry in advance, but i wanted to get something out tonight!

word count: 2727 💗

“When do you want me to pick you up?” Julien asks, her voice coming from the phone propped up on the coffee table. You’re sitting on the couch painting your nails while she watches through the screen, her face close to the camera on the facetime call.

“Umm, what time did Phoebe want to meet us there?” you ask, carefully applying a second coat. 

“I think sometime around 9?” Julien says, smiling at the sight of you, deeply concentrated on your manicure. 

“Okay” you say, capping the bottle and blowing on your freshly painted nails. “Do you wanna come over and get ready with me before we leave?”. Julien nods enthusiastically. “Yeah, that sounds fun. When should I come over?” she asks, getting even closer to the screen. You pick up the phone, careful not to smudge your nails, and laugh at Julien’s expression, her face giant on the screen. “Oh, I don't care, maybe around 7? I can order a pizza or something?”

“Sounds good princess” she nods. “I’ll see you then. You smile and blow her a kiss before hanging up the phone and grabbing a bottle of clear nail polish to go over the red painted onto your nails with a smile.

Julien, however, is much less relaxed. As soon as you hang up the phone, she lets out a huge sigh and immediately calls Phoebe and Lucy to vent.

“Guys, I’m literally going over to her house to get ready with her, which really means watching her get ready, and I don’t know if I can take it.” she says dramatically. “She’s just so gorgeous and smart and funny and cute but I don’t even know if she’s into girls and I feel like I’m going to fuck up and make things SO awkward and if I ruin our friendship I don’t know what I’ll do and I just-”

“Yeah, I’m gonna stop you right there” Phoebe cuts her off. “First off, that girl is definitely not straight.”

“Oh one hundred percent,” Lucy chimes in. “Remember when she was auxing when we were at the beach and she played girl in red? And when she and I talked for like an hour about Portrait of a Lady on Fire?”

“Yeah, or when all of us were like, collectively drooling over that Angelina Jolie movie? Honestly, shoot your shot JB.” Phoebe encourages, Lucy nodding along.

“I don’t know guys, I really don’t want to fuck up our relationship. I mean, other than you guys, she’s my best friend in the entire world. I don’t know what I’d do without her.”

“Julien, even if she was straight, which for the record she’s definitely not, she would never, ever hold your feelings against you.” Lucy tells her seriously, Phoebe agreeing with her. 

“I guess so.” Julien tells them. “Alright, I love you both, I’ll see you at the bar tonight.” Julien waves to the pair before hanging up, dropping her phone onto the table, and dropping her face into her hands.

When you answer the door you’re fresh out of the shower, fresh faced with wet hair, wearing an oversized Green Day shirt, and tiny shorts, and Julien feels like she’s about to have a heart attack.

“Hey, you” you say, giving her a tight hug before opening the door further and letting her inside. “I just called, pizza should be on its way soon!” Julien can hear music playing faintly from your bathroom, and is acutely aware of the smell of your body wash and the fact that you are wearing very little clothing.

“Yeah, sounds good.” she says, walking inside and taking her shoes off, before following you into the bathroom where your makeup and hair products are spread out over the counter. She sits on top of the toilet and watches you dry your hair while you tell her about your day and the drama between some of your friends, looking at you like you hung the moon. Satisfied with your hair, you drag her into your bedroom and sit her down on the bed, pulling different hangers out of the closet.

“Okay, so I have this dress I thrifted,” you tell her, holding up a short, black dress. “It has this really cool neckline, and I was thinking I could do my layer necklaces and those black heels?” You show her another hanger. “I have this skirt too, though, and I thought I could wear it with that red top and my leather jacket? And my boots?” Julien stares at you blankly, but really she’s just picturing you in the clothes you’re holding up and trying so hard to keep her cool. You gently wave your fingers at her. “Hey, earth to JB, you okay over there?” 

She starts, and stares at you for a second, blushing wildly. “Oh, um, I don’t, I mean, I think they would both look good.” she stutters, glancing down at her tattooed hands which are fidgeting in her lap. You roll your eyes playfully, laughing gently at her words.

“But which one would look better?” you ask, waving both of the hangers in her direction. “I was kinda leaning towards the dress, especially cause then I would match your shirt,  but I really wanted your input!” Julien flushes again at your words, before nodding her head in agreement. 

“I um, I think the dress would look really gorgeous on you.” she manages, and you beam at your words, heading into the bathroom to change and leaving Julien a flustered mess on the edge of your bed. Reminding herself of Lucy and Phoebe’s encouragements, she tells herself to get a grip and get over herself, taking several deep breaths as she waits for you to come back.

When you return, fully dressed and putting on your jewelry, Julien swears she can feel her heart stop. You pause, slightly self conscious under her gaze, and cast your eyes down, fidgeting with the hem of your dress. “What, um, what do you think?” you ask her, slowly meeting her eyes with your own.

“I think you look stunning” she tells you, voice full of sincerity. “I mean, shit, you’re easily one of the most beautiful people I’ve ever seen.”

You flush at her words, and smile at her before grabbing your jacket and sitting down beside her to put on your shoes. “I think you’re one of the most beautiful people I’ve ever seen too, JB.” you tell her, and miss the way her face burns at your words. “Ready to go?” you ask her, straightening up and grabbing her hand, pulling her into the living room as she nods. “You sure you’re okay with driving?” you ask her, grabbing your keys and phone while she ties her shoes.

“Of course I am,” she reassures you. “You just focus on having fun tonight, okay?” You grin at her, and the two of you chat about the night ahead all the way down to her truck, where she holds the door open for you before climbing inside herself. As soon as the car starts, she hands you her phone, and you pull up the playlist she had made for the both of you, singing along to the music the whole way to the bar. Julien has her hand resting on your knee as you speed through traffic, and you have your window down, the cold, nighttime air rushing through your hair.

Once the truck pulls into a parking space outside the bar and Julien opens your door, grabbing your hand and leading you into the bar, things start to speed up. Once the two of you find Lucy and Phoebe, making your way over to the booth they had claimed and greeting them with tight hugs and cheek kisses, Julien offers to get the three of you drinks, and after she leaves, Phoebe pulls you onto the dance floor. You throw your arms around Phoebe’s neck and she guides your hips to the music, the two of you a giggling, sweaty mess under the flashing lights and blasting speakers of the club. After Julien returns with your drinks, you pull Phoebe towards the table and slide into the booth, leaning up against Julien who lays an arm across your shoulders as you sip your drink.

“Having fun out there?” she asks, her face extremely close to yours in order to be heard over the music and chatter of the club. You nod, grinning, and gesture towards Phoebe

“She’s taking charge,” you say, laughing. “I’m just along for the ride.” Phoebe winks at you, pulling you into her side and planting a sloppy kiss on your cheek, causing you to squeal and laugh. Lucy laughs loudly at the pout on Julien’s face at the loss of contact between the two of you, and Julien rolls her eyes, before quickly excusing herself to go to the bathroom.

In front of the mirror, Julien splashes water on her face, exhaling deeply and trying to talk herself up. The images of you dancing with Phoebe, the ones of you getting ready earlier, and every single second you had spent with her played in her head as she spiraled into a haze of overthinking and self-doubt. How could someone like you ever fall for someone like her, she wonders, but before she can get too deep into her own head, Lucy barges into the bathroom. Seeing the questioning look on Julien's face, Lucy cuts her off before she can ask:

“I know you too well, JB. I know you’re in here overthinking, but you need to be out there making a move.” Julien tries to protest, but before she can even get the words out Lucy cuts her off again, holding out a hand. “Don’t even try to give me any of that ‘she’s so out of my league’ bullshit either Julien, you two are made for each other and you know it. Now snap out of it and get your ass out there. Go get your girl!”

Julien grins ruefully at Lucy, thanking her for the pep talk before heading out of the bathroom to find you.

Meanwhile, you had wandered over the bar to get another drink for you and Phoebe. Julien was acting weird, barely making eye contact with you ever since you two had arrived, and you were stuck wondering if you had done anything wrong. When she had left the table, you had wanted to go after her, but Lucy insisted that you should stay, that she would go check on Julien. Phoebe had encouraged you to get another drink, so you were sitting in front of the crowded bar while the drastically overworked bartender made his rounds. You were so absorbed in what was happening with Julien you didn’t notice the guy next to you that had been ogling you from the second you sat down, until he opened his mouth.

“Hey you, come here often?” he asked, and you cringed internally, before tuning to find the man. He wasn’t unattractive, but his sleazy pick up line coupled with the stench of alcohol on him and the fact that he was way too close to you turned you off completely to the man. Well that, plus the fact that you already knew what you wanted, and it wasn’t him.

“Um, not really.” You said politely, before attempting to turn back around. The man’s hand on your shoulder prevented you from doing so, though, and you felt panic rising up within you. You tuned out whatever he was saying, searching frantically for Lucy, for Phoebe or Julien behind him, but with no luck.

“Like I was saying,” the man continued. “A pretty girl like you really shouldn’t be here all alone. Let me buy you a drink, then maybe we can keep getting to know each other at my place.” 

You felt fear closing over you, your friends were nowhere to be seen and this guy was relentless. “No, really, I’m not interested.” you told him as calmly as you could.

“Why not?” he asked, grinning horribly at you.

“I’m not available.” you hear yourself say, to which the man scoffs.

“That’s what they all say, but I don’t see anyone here for you-” but the man is cut off by a firm hand sliding around your waist. 

“Sorry about that, baby.” Julien says, pulling you protectively into her. “Line for the bathroom was crazy long. Who’s this guy?” she asks, pointing to the man whose slimy grin had slid right off of his face. Relief rushes through you at the feeling of Julien’s hands on your hips, and you exhale a breath you didn’t realize you were holding. 

“Don’t worry about it, honey.” you tell her, melting back into her arms. “This is, Matt, was it?” The man scowls.

“Mike, actually.” he responds, gruffly. Julien sticks out her tattooed hand. 

“Mike, hi, I’m Julien. Her girlfriend.” she says gruffly, her voice and hands on you sending a wave of heat through your body. “And you’re obviously making her uncomfortable, so if you could leave, that would be great.”

“No, you know what, we were having a good time before you interrupted.” Mike scowled. “Who the fuck do you think you are?”

“I’m her fucking girlfriend.” Julien snaps at him, before pulling you into a strong kiss. You relax into her, throwing your arms around her neck and she pulls you in by the waist, standing between your legs and tilting your head gently upwards to meet her lips. You kiss her back feverishly, until she abruptly pulls away and steps back. “He, uh, he left.” she tells you, running her hand across her mouth. “Sorry about that.” she mutters, before turning on her heel and running out the door, leaving you sitting at the bar, speechless.

You stare at the spot where she disappeared into the crowd, heading for the door for a moment, before jumping up and stumbling after her. You pass by the booth with Lucy and Phoebe who are sitting, staring at you with smirks on their faces. 

“Well, what are you waiting for?” Lucy asks, smiling gently as you get closer. “Go get your girl.” Phoebe whoops at her words, and you roll your eyes playfully at the two of them, before turning towards the door and hurrying out into the cold air. Once you stumble outside, and walk a couple feet down the sidewalk, you see Julien in the alley, leaned against the bricks with a cigarette in her hand. You walk slowly towards her, watching as she takes shaky drags from the cigarette in her hand.

“Hey, Jules.” You call softly to her when you’re a couple feet away, and she slowly meets your eyes with her own red-rimmed ones. “Why are you crying?”

“Fuck, I’m so, so fucking sorry, I don’t know what I was thinking, you just looked so uncomfortable and I wanted to make sure you were safe but I wasn’t thinking and-” but you cut her off, surging forwards to kiss her again. Your hands fly into her hair and she drops the cigarette, crushing it under her boot before pulling you in by your hips. She runs her strong hands up your back and bites your bottom lip gently, causing you to moan into her mouth, tugging gently at the roots of her hair. Moments later, you break away, panting, and she rests her forehead against yours, breathing hard.

“You have nothing to apologize for.” you tell her, placing a finger to her lips when she begins to protest. “You did save me, and you showed me that you feel this too.” you gesture between the two of you. “I’ve been waiting for you to make a move for like, forever!” you tell her breathily, giggling at the incredulous look on her face.

“Me?!” she asks. “I thought I wasn’t your, uh, your type, I guess”

“Well, you thought wrong.” you say, before lacing your fingers with hers, smiling at the beautiful grin that breaks onto her face. “Let’s go tell Lucy and Phoebe good night, and then you can take me home.”

Julien steals one more quick kiss before squeezing your hand gently and pulling you after her back into the bar, laughing as you stumble, and thanking her lucky stars she had been wrong about you.