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shhh-no-ones-home · 5 years ago

Text

religious disbelief josh balz x reader

+++++++++ The end is a little darker than I meant it to be 😬

this is my first time ever writing for balz so if it sucks im sorry. also its broken into parts, the beginning is the beginning of the school year and the other two parts are after graduation.

im making a balz one with a similar concept and completely different outcome so if this one was bad or hard to read that one will be much more light hearted I promise.

Song: the reaper by as it is

tag list: @thisplace-ishaunted @ryansitkowskiswifey @alilpunkrock @theoneandonlykymberlee @svintsandghosts @cynic-spirit +++++++++

i walked down the sidewalk shoulder to shoulder with my best friend. josh and i had known each other for what felt like forever, only recently had it turned into something more than a friendship though. i laughed at what he had said to me.

"i told you once, ill tell you a thousand times. the day i decide to get on that two wheeled death machine is the day i decided you can take me away from this town."

i hated his motorcycle just as much as i hated the thought of moving away. i was kind of scared of both to be honest. everything i knew was here, especially him and i didnt want that to change. he nudged my arm with his.

"im telling you, youd be perfectly safe riding with me. but if your stakes are getting you out of this town i will gladly find every excuse."

i shook my head at him.

"you know i dont want to leave."

he sent me a look.

"come on y/n you cant really want to stay here all your life do you? i mean, whats holding you back, your parents? me? hell ill be gone in a year anyways."

i frowned at him.

"and you would just leave without me? given that we're still together at that point that is."

he looked a little offended.

"you planning on leaving me by graduation in the spring?"

i laughed with him.

"of course not silly, im just thinking ahead. if you leave, what am i gonna do? we all know itll take an act of god to get me outta here. even if i did decide to leave on my own my parents would never let me."

he smirked at me.

"true about the parents, but maybe we need an act from something a little darker than God."

he winked at me and i shook my head at him as we walked up the stairs to my house.

"yeah keep saying that and you wont be able to come over anymore. ever since my parents found out you listen to metal music theyve added you to the prayer list at our church."

we both laughed a little at that. he took my hand in his.

"oh come on, when are you gonna stop going? we both know you hate organized religion, and you listen to metal too."

i giggled a little bit.

"just imagine if my parents knew about my tattoo."

i said quietly. he hugged me to him and kissed me gently.

"i think theyd burn it off you, your dad would at least."

he smiled down at me, pushing my hair away from my face as the wind blew it around. i raised my brows.

"wouldnt that be something."

he kissed me again. then there was a knock on the living room window that made me jump. i turned around to see me mom knelt on the couch watching us. josh waved at her condescendingly, making me laugh.

"dont provoke her."

i turned back to him and he kissed my forehead.

"ill see you later. we've gotta work on that science project after all."

he winked at me as he turned and walked down the steps to my house. when he was almost to the sidewalk he turned around and walked backwards, waving goodbye to me.

"i love you."

he called to me and i smiled widely at him.

"i love you too!"

i watched him for a second before opening my front door and greeting my mom with a smile.

"how was work?"

i asked as i made my way to the stairs.

"work was fine, just tired, i wanted to wait for you to get home before i went to bed though. its nice being able to see you everyday now, not just on weekends."

i held onto the stair rail as i turned to her.

"well im glad i get to see you everyday now too, even if it is just for a little bit. ill probably start dinner about five thirty before dad gets home."

she nodded.

"okay sweetie."

°°°°°°°°°

i stood in front of my mirror and nervously shook my hands out. graduation was finally over and we had gone back to the house for me to change before the school led lock-in for the graduates. i wasnt nervous about the lock-in though, i was worried about my parents realizing that josh would be there too. they barely liked him at the beginning of the school year and as much time as we spent together since my parents were getting more and more infuriated with him. it also didnt help that he liked to take them to the edge on almost everything, arguing and getting on their nerves as much as he possibly could. i was shaken from my thoughts when my mom knocked on my bedroom door.

"you ready baby? you dont wanna be late."

i nodded and picked my bag up off the floor.

"yep, we can go."

i looked in my bag one last time to make sure i had everything, phone, playing cards, medication, water bottle, the likeness. when we hit the bottom of the stairs my dad looked up at me over the newspaper he was reading in the low light of our living room.

"where did you get that shirt?"

he asked and i looked down at it. shit. i had gotten it from josh.

"uh, a friend."

he raised a brow at me.

"have i met this friend? surely not i suppose if they are giving you clothing with satanic symbols on it."

he looked over at my mom who was now wearing a frown too.

"do you have time to change?"

he asked and i looked down at the time on my phone.

"no daddy, im already late."

i said in my best pouty voice. normally that worked, he couldnt resist the charms of his little girl. i watched him fold the newspaper up and set it on the couch next to him.

"fine but when we pick you up in the morning its going in the trash."

i walked to him and kissed him on the cheek.

"okay daddy."

i followed my mom to the door and out to the car. when we were buckled in she took off towards school. i looked down at my phone and opened a message to josh.

"what are you wearing?"

i hit send, a second later he texted me back.

"am i supposed to say nothing?"

i tried to suppress a laugh and just shook my head.

"no dork, im wearing one of your shirts and i need to change into something less 'metal'"

i hit send again and waited. then i got a new message.

"sorry babe, i dont think thats gonna happen."

then i got the picture of him in another shirt with the same band on it. i breathed deeply and sent him back an 'okay.' when i looked up we were already pulling into the schools parking lot.

"when are we supposed to be getting you again?"

my mom asked as i stood out of the car. i leaned down and looked at her.

"uh dont worry about it mom, its super early so im just gonna have someone else bring me home."

i looked across the car, through her window at joshs motorcycle. damn him. i turned my attention back to her.

"okay baby, well ill see you tomorrow then."

"thanks mom."

i said, closing the door and walking into the school. as i walked up to the table to get my bag checked i noticed josh standing in the back next to one of the vending machines. A second later my phone buzzed. it was a text from him asking where i was. i smiled to myself, thanking the counselor for giving my bag back and walked quickly to him.

"im right here."

i said making him jump and clutch at his chest.

"jesus y/n you scared the shit out of me!"

i laughed and took his hand in mine, kissing his cheek.

"i think thats a small price to pay for bringing your motorcycle."

he blushed and gave me his best sorry face.

"i forgot?"

he said trying to play it off. i just shook my head at him.

"its whatever, ill grill you tomorrow when we leave."

he smiled at me.

"okay."

i squeezed his hand in mine.

"come on, i wanna see what all they had planned, i heard there was supposed to be a magician."

he laughed as me as i dragged him down the hall towards the gym.

"sure babe."

°°°°°°°°°

i held onto josh tightly as he pulled up in front of my house. i knew my parents would probably be awake already, dad at least getting ready for work. the sound of the motorcycle wouldnt be any help though. i stood up off of it and took my helmet off, swinging my hair out. josh took his off too.

"you want me to wait a minute before leaving?"

i looked back at my house, the sun barely peaking over our fence, it was still so early. I looked back at him.

"i was gonna say no, but maybe."

he nodded.

"text me when its safe to leave."

he winked at me and i kissed him gently.

"thanks for bringing me home."

i pushed my helmet into his hands and walked up to my front door, pushing it open. i was surprised it wasnt locked. i looked around for a second, seeing no one and ascending the stairs. when i moved to go to my room i heard my parents door creak.

"shirt."

my dad demanded. i turned to look at him and sent him a nervous smile.

"daddy can i at least change first? i just walked in the door."

he looked kinda mad. i knew i shouldnt have let josh bring me home on the bike. he held his hand out.

"shirt."

i frowned at him.

"okay just give me a second."

i stepped into my room and went to close the door but he pushed it back open.

"give me that damn shirt before i have to rip it off of you."

"cant i change by myself?"

he went to grab for it but i pushed him away.

"you got it from that no good josh kid didnt you? thats the friend. You know how we feel about him."

he said sternly.

"daddy hes my boyfriend."

he tried to grab at me again, holding the shirt firmly by the collar.

"i told you to stop seeing him. hes no good for you, especially if hes pushing you further and further away from god."

he moved his other hand up to tear the shirt but i held his hands in place.

"what is so wrong with that?!"

i shouted, eyes closing tightly. he paused for a second and i only opened my eyes back up when he let me go.

"how dare you say that in this house! if you are going to live under my roof you are going to love and respect the lord that built it."

"the lord didnt build shit! and maybe i dont wanna stay in this house anymore!"

he was fuming now.

"fine! you wanna go to hell? then you can fuck your boyfriend right to the gates of it, tell the devil kiss my ass while youre at it!"

he shouted at me, turning on his heel and storming out of my room. i breathed heavily for a second before looking outside. josh was still sat on his motorcycle out front, looking between his phone and the house. then i got an idea. i grabbed a bag from under my bed and started shoving shit in it, anything i could find. my favorite shirts, socks, undergarments, pants, money, anything id need. when it was full i slung it over my head, shoved my phone charger into my purse/bag that i still had on from the lock-in and stormed out of my room too. when i hit the end of the stairs i was met with my father sat on the couch, angrily putting on his work boots.

"where do you think youre going?"

he said a little snarky. i gripped my bag tightly.

"if you dont want a non believer living under your roof then ill find somewhere else to live."

i walked quickly to the door and just as i opened it he grabbed me by the hair, pulling me back.

"or maybe you just need an attitude adjustment."

he pulled me back and i reached out.

"let go of me!"

i practically yelled. i could hear him breathing heavily.

"you will learn to love and respect the lord as well as the family he has put before us. if you wont do it willingly, then ill make you."

"is that really a good idea?"

i heard josh say and i looked over at him standing in the doorway. my dad pushed me away from him.

"look at what youve done! youve corrupted my little girl! she's a satanist because of you!"

i ran to josh and he held me tightly to his side, he looked down at me as tears fell from my eyes.

"sir, in all due respect she has never once praised the devil. i would know, im the only one she hangs out with when shes not at home."

my dad looked beyond mad.

"if anything id say you pushing the lord down her throat her whole life has made her denounce your religion. so maybe you should be looking at yourself, not me."

my dad started after us and i pushed josh out the door, slamming it behind me. it swung open as we ran down the sidewalk to joshs bike.

"get back here you little shit!"

Josh jumped on first, starting it up and handing me my helmet.

"drive!"

i shouted as my dad got closer. next thing i new we were booking it down the street. i just held myself tightly to josh, resting my head on his back as tears fell heavily from my eyes. when we were a few streets over he stopped. i sat up and took my helmet off.

"you okay?"

he asked, holding his own helmet against him and looked at me very concerned. i sniffled and wiped my face.

"i am now. but i wanna get as far away from here as possible."

he looked between my eyes.

"are you sure?"

i nodded quickly.

"please josh, just take me somewhere safe. somewhere i dont have to deal with this anymore. wherever its just me and you."

he kissed me gently, pulling away and resting his forehead against mine.

"ill take you wherever you wanna go."

i pulled away and nodded at him.

"I love you josh."

I leaned forward and hugged him to me, feeling him kiss the top of my head.