#jongin angst

[eomayas]

confessions • kji (pt.2)

pairing: jongin x f!reader, fwb2l. sequel to ‘d appointment’.

genre: fluff & angst

synopsis: jealousy leads to a life changing confession (happy ending!!)

warnings: angst, swearing, jealousy

a/n: lol nobody asked for this but i really wanted to write this after yesterday! so enjoy 😋

“jongin, i really gotta go,” you giggle, kissing him again. he holds onto your waist tighter, grumbling about how he doesn’t want you to go. “really, nini, i have to leave.” you say, pulling out of his grasp and finding your clothes around his room.

you’ve seen a lot more of him recently, and your relationship has changed. he started asking you over to hang out, taking you out for food, running errands with you. you didn’t know what to think of your relationship anymore, and could barely tell your friends because none of them liked to hear about jongin anyway. he had a bit of a reputation for being a womanizer and a player, but you didn’t get that with him. as far as you knew, you were the only person who’s been in his bed for the last two months.

you really dont know what to call your relationship—you never talk about it with him. you refer to him as a friend when people ask about him, but nothing more. but you know that youre deeper than friends, you pretend not to see it in his eyes when you’re lying on his chest at night, pretend not to feel it in your stomach when he leans over his middle console and kisses you when he picks you up from your house. you pretend none of those feelings exist, so you can keep your peace.

“where do you have to go anyway?” he asks as you hook your bra back on.

“uh, just meeting a friend,” you say, not ready to admit the truth that the friend is a man and he’s not really a friend. your friend sana set you up with a guy she knows, doyoung, and you’ve been hanging out for awhile. of course, in between you and jongins time together.

jongin frowns at you and your hesitation. “who?” he presses as you pull on your shirt. you let out a breath and fix your hair, stalling as you avoid his question.

“chaewon,” you lie, not really sure why. you’re not dating, it shouldn’t be a problem. but with the way you’ve been hanging out recently, it feels like it could cause a rift—maybe you’re imagining it, though, and he doesn’t actually care. maybe your feelings are one sided.

“what are you guys gonna do?” he asks. you shrug and grab your phone off of his nightstand, a text from doyoung on the screen.

doyoung: can’t wait to see you!

you bite back a smile and jongin notices, his chest bubbling with an emotion he can’t quite place. anger? no, not quite. envy? jealously, maybe? can’t be—you’re not his. but it sure does feel like it sometimes.

you tap back a response, your acrylics accentuating your every keyboard stroke.

y/n: see you soon :)

“alright, i’ll see you later?” you say, leaning over to kiss him. it’s stiff, and awkward, but neither of you say anything. he doesn’t offer to walk you out like he always does, and you pretend it doesn’t bother you.

jongin and you don’t talk for three days, and in those three days, you occupy yourself with doyoung when you’re not at work or with your friends. doyoung is kind, he’s sweet and makes you laugh. he listens. he’s perfectly safe—your friends like him, and they’re all going to meet him tonight at a get together.

you sigh as you look at your phone, your message going unanswered. you invited jongin too, just to be nice since a few of his friends are going to be there. you haven’t spent anytime around each others friends, though you know a couple because that’s how you met each other.

sana nudges you. “doyoung is here,” you flip your phone over as her eyes gaze down for a split second. you look up and see him walk through the door, two of his friends behind him. you stand up from your spot on the couch and walk over to him, adjusting your skirt. doyoungs eyes scan the room and when they land on you, he gives you the smile that you’ve grown fond of.

“hey!” you say, giving him a hug. you press a quick kiss on his cheek and pull back, his hand sliding to the small of your back.

“hey! i hope you don’t mind thst i brought some friends—this is baejin and that’s sungwoon,” he says, introducing you to his friends. you smile and shake their hands. “is sana here?” he asks, leaning close to you. you nod, and get the overwhelming feeling that he’s about to kiss you, so you quickly grab his arm and lead him over to your group of friends.

sana jumps up when she sees him and gives him a hug, your three friends, yujin, chaewon, and bona following suit.

the five of you settle on the couch, doyoung on the end and you sandwiched between him and sana. he keeps an arm wrapped around your waist the entire time, barely moving it even when you shift. you don’t mind his touch or the weight of his arm—it feels nice.

you let yourself sneak a glance at your phone, hoping to see if he responded—a ‘no’ would even be fine—but there’s nothing new. you set your phone face down in your lap, and catch sanas eye when you look back up. you furrow your brow at her and she shakes her head. you ignore her and lean back against doyoung, his arm moving to wrap around your shoulder. you catch his dangling hand in yours, and interlock your fingers.

“you two are so cute, it’s making me sick,” yujin says. you and doyoung only giggle, and when you glance at sana, she’s side eyeing you behind her red solo cup.

sanas eyes drift around the room, but you ignore her until she steps on your foot, not enough to hurt but enough to get your attention. you glance at her again, and she shoots her eyes to the door, and dread immediately fills your stomach.

jongin walks through the door, many people in the party immediately greeting him. you check your phone again and see that he still never responded, which annoys you. if you had a heads up that he was showing up, you would have never sat here cuddled up with doyoung.

you try to ignore the greetings to jongin, but they’re obnoxious and louder than the music playing. “ugh, sehun is so irritating,” chaewon grumbles, but she keeps her eyes on the tall boy talking to jongin. they have some weird tension going on.

“y/n, im gonna go find baejin really quick, do you want to come?” doyoung asks. you shake your head and tell him that you’ll be here, and he leaves but not before pressing a kiss to your cheek.

you smile, but it falters when sana scoffs. “what?” you ask, annoyed with how she’s been treating you tonight.

“don’t lead him on, please. i know you invited jongin, and maybe you want two boyfriends, but doyoung is a good guy. leave him out of it,” she says, her voice serious.

you drop your mouth open to reply, but can’t find the words. “your boyfriends coming over,” she mutter, taking another swig of her drink. you glance over to see jongin walking towards you.

“he’s not my boyfriend,” you manage, standing up to greet him. you reach in for a hug, and he reciprocates, his hands too low on your back for it to be friendly. “i didn’t know you were coming.” you say, pulling away from him.

jongin keeps his hands on you, ignoring the gawking from your friends. “i said i might,” he shrugs and you roll your eyes. “why, you wanted more time to hide your little boyfriend?” he asks. with that, you scoff and pull away from him, already done with the entire night.

“i don’t have a boyfriend, so both of you can stop,” you say to jongin and sana, crossing your arms over your chest. “if you came here to bother me, you can just leave.” you say, staring up at him.

“i came to keep you company, but i see you already have some,” he says, mirroring your stance. you get ready to reply, but see doyoung coming up behind the two of you with baejin in tow, and get a wave of guilt, dread, and anxiety at the prospect of the two of them interacting. this can’t be my life, you think.

doyoung approaches you, a smile on his face until he sees your stance, and then sweeps his eyes over to jongin. doyoungs face falls at the obvious tension, and jongin sizes him up. “are you alright?” he asks you, a hand on your arm. you nod and he looks over at jongin and back at you. “do you two know each other?” he asks.

know is putting it lightly.

before you can respond, jongin interjects. “i’m jongin,” he holds his hand out to shake, and it takes everything in you to not push his hand away.

doyoung shakes his hand, his face not giving way to how he really feels. “we’re friends,” you offer once they drop hands. friends is putting it lightly, too lightly that it’s almost untrue.

jongin scoffs at that. “if that’s what you want to call it, sure we are,” you glare at him and doyoung shifts awkwardly beside you, unsure of what to say. “surely she’s mentioned me. because she’s never mentioned you.” he adds, making you blood boil.

“jongin, stop!” you say, your eyes widening. you look back over at doyoung who nods his head once, twice. “doyoung, just ignore him, please?” you say, reaching out to grab his hand, but he pulls away. you feel helpless as he moves past you to talk to sana, and you hear him tell her that he’s gonna head out. you feel like shit as you try to get him to talk to you, but again he dodges you.

“y/n, i dont want to be apart of this. maybe when you figure… whatever this is out, you can call me. but i don’t want any of this,” he waves vaguely between you and jongin, and all you can do is stand there pathetically as he walks away.

“yeah, what he said,” jongin says, shaking his head, and all you see is red. how dare he try to blow you off, when he is the cause of this entire mess. if he just kept his mouth shut, doyoung would still be here and you’d be enjoying your night.

you stomp after jongin as he walks off, grabbing ahold of his shirt, pulling him towards the direction of the kitchen. “quit it,” he says, pulling out of your grasp.

“you don’t get to leave! what the hell is your problem?” you ask, putting your hands on your hips. a few people in the kitchen glance at you and jongin, and he sighs and pulls you out to the backyard where it’s empty. “what is wrong with you?”

“i didnt do anything,” he says and you bark out a laugh.

“you don’t talk to me for days for god knows why, you don’t respond to my text, and the. you basically show up unannounced? and then you ruin a good thing for me? what is wrong with you?” you could cry from frustration, but you don’t. you manage to keep the tears at bay as you stare at the man across from you.

jongin doesn’t say anything, just leans against the stair railing with his arms crossed over his chest, and looks away from you. you blink at him, waiting for him to say something but he doesn’t. “well?” you say, scoffing.

he shakes his head. “you just don’t get it,” he mumbles.

“what?”

“you really don’t see it, y/n? it’s not obvious?” he asks, finally looking you in the eye. you shrink under his gaze, your eyes darting around the backyard.

“what are you talking about, jongin?” you ask, confusion evident in your voice. he runs a hand through his hair frustratedly and drops his hands at his sides. you cross your arms over your abdomen and stare at him, waiting for him to just admit whatever he’s holding back.

“you don’t feel a change between us? really?” he asks, and for a second the air leaves your lungs. he can’t be asking you this, because then what you’ve been imagining is actually true, therefore real. and now you have to confront it.

“i guess,” you say vaguely, your voice small. he runs his hands through his hair like he always does when he’s stressed or anxious—one thing you picked up on after seeing him more often. “what are you trying to say, jongin?” you sigh, just wanting to hear the words coming from his mouth. you need that confession, or else you think you’ll go crazy if you lose two men you like on the same night.

“i’m trying to say that i can’t stop thinking about you, that i think about you every second you’re not with me. that when i have to go somewhere, i call you because i’d rather go—i don’t fucking know, to the store—with you, over anybody else. and i came here tonight, even though i know your friends don’t fucking like me, because i wanted to see you. and i know you’re upset that i made your little boyfriend leave, but i don’t really care, okay? i can’t stand to see you with somebody else, not when you kiss me the way you do, or say my name,” he rambles, wiping his mouth before starting up again. you can only stare at him, stunned. you’ve gotten more than you were really asking for, and he’s not even done. “and i dont only mean when we have sex, okay? i know that’s how we started, but if you couldn’t tell, i don’t only want to do that with you. i want something more with you. if you don’t, fine. but i won’t buy it, because you chased after me, and not him.” jongin catches his breath, shocked that he just blurted all of this out. it’s been buried deep in his brain, his heart, for awhile now. he hasn’t been able to get you out of his head for weeks, and gets giddy when he sees your name pop up on his phone. he’s been silently losing his mind about you, and you haven’t even noticed.

“why didn’t you say anything before?” you ask pathetically, walking over to him.

he lets out a laugh that almost sounds like a cry. “because if you didn’t feel the same way, and we stopped hanging out, i would seriously die,” he says, grabbing your hands. you smile at his words. “i’m going crazy here, y/n.” jongin sighs, looking down at you and bringing your conjoined hands up to his chest.

you faintly feel his fast heartbeat and nearly coo. he’s so endearing, and the way he’s looking at you with his big, brown eyes is enough to bring you to your knees. “jongin, i-“ you cut yourself off to laugh, the next words leaving your mouth about to be so embarrassing. “i really like you, and i don’t know how you couldn’t tell. i mean, every time you said anything, i giggled like a schoolgirl.” you say, pressing your knuckles into his sternum.

“i thought you just wanted to fuck.”

“well, yes,” you blush, looking up at him. “but i really fucking liked—like—you,” you say, letting out a breath.

“are we doing this? i mean, for real?” he asks, dropping your interlocked hands out to the sides. you shrug.

“we could try,” you say, and he smiles, his face lighting up in a way that makes your heart skip a beat and your stomach flip.

and you two really were going to try, the opinions of your friends be damned. if there was a general consensus, it’s that you’d both go insane for the others love, and that’s enough.

[synthetickitsune]

X-EXO!Kai (EXO) | Chase angst | 0.7k | gn!reader

You fucked up. Big time. You knew once you met his eyes through the window that you've lost the game. And your life, perhaps, too. 

You realize it’s pointless but you can't stop the frantic packing. On your wobbly knees, in need of supporting yourself on the table, against the wall with every other step, but you still try to get shit done. 

Maybe he'll have a meltdown. It wouldn't be the first time. Maybe he'll leave you out of this one. You did tell him you don't like pathetic guys. 

There's no time to breathe, no time to think. Honestly you're not even sure what you're throwing into your bag, if it's useful or not, probably not - all the important stuff is already with your friend but you don't want to endanger them more than you've done already. You finally stop to look over the mess that is your room, sight unfocused, and realize it’s hopeless. And that's before you see him. So he’s caught up with you already. 

Kāi is standing at the opposite side of the room. His chest is heaving, his eyes are wild and clouded by anger but you see the tears welled up in them. You have no sympathy for the monster that makes the blood in your veins turn into ice with terror. You can't move, but you can't look at him either. He growls once he sees you averting your gaze and he sounds like anything but a human being.

So you look up to see him glaring at you but then you blink and he's gone. You blink again and suddenly all you see is black and your body hurts. The back of your head is pounding and he's straddling you, looking down on you while strangling you. You can’t breathe. His hands are tight around your throat, cutting off your oxygen entirely. 

"You think you can run away from me?" he snarls, leaning his weight on your throat and you can't see, you can barely hear. You think he might crush your windpipe if he doesn’t stop. "All I ever wanted was you."

"Did you think they could protect you? Did you think they'd make you happy?" when he gets no response, safe for weak whimpers, he lets go. He leans back, hands on his thighs on you shake and writhe under him, desperately gulping down air. You look up at him and you both have tears streaming down your cheeks.

"How could you leave me?” he accuses. You didn't - he didn't let you. "How could you ignore me?" You literally couldn't - he would always force his way back into your life. Even now - now when he's literally sitting on top of you and you're too weak to move, when you try to face away from him he harshly grabs your jaw and turns your head back to face him. It hurts. You feel like the bone is going to crack.

"Look at me," Kāi orders but it sounds just like a plea, "You're mine. Why do you keep running away?" You don’t because you can’t. And you won’t be. 

Will you? 

Thoughts are running through your head. Survival instinct kicks in. You're already helpless and under him. What are the chances he's gonna let you go now that you almost - almost - got away from him? You're not naive enough to think he's gonna get up, scold you, and leave. 

You wanna live. 

You don't want him to hurt you. And he hasn't before. Maybe it'd be safer to give in. He treated you nicely before all this... 

You whine, quietly, begging with your eyes. He sighs, but his hand slides up to cup your cheek. You lean into his touch hesitantly. This time there are no repercussions for closing your eyes. 

"See? Doesn't this feel good?" you hear the smile in his voice. It doesn't. It makes you sick and it makes you hate yourself for betraying yourself. But you wanna live. You don't wanna be hurt. You startle when he leans his forehead against yours. 

"Let's go home."

It starts sinking in when he lifts you up and carries you bridal style. Is it worth it? Nothing ever sounded more like a death sentence. You will live. But at what price? 

Is it worth it?

You know it's not, but you can't bring yourself to long for death nonetheless.

[proudahgase-exol]

Tender Love 💗

Jongin x reader

Summary: Jongin feels unloved and out of place, observing how friends and strangers are treated by their lovers, but feels unloved when with his S/O, leading to sadness and insecurity.

What’s Tender love? Tender love is all part of the same love you feel for someone, it's just showing it in a more openly positive way such as a cuddle or encouragement when they are feeling down or need reassurance.

Jongin pov:

 

Today I got invited to dinner at Junmyeon’s place. All the guys were there, and so their significance was another. It was sweet to see them all in love and together as a family.

 

On the other hand, I was alone; my partner was busy, and I had to show up to dinner alone. I understand that they had something else to do, and it usually didn’t bother me, but lately I can’t help but feel lonely, especially in places like this where everyone is with their loved ones and I’m not.

 

I know we have been dating for a year now, and at first I thought I was okay with how y/n acted. I knew they didn’t like to show too much affection, and it was fine with me at first. That is, until I started to feel jealous and like y/n didn’t actually love me.

 

The whole time I was at Junmyeon Hyung’s place, I tried not to show how upset and jealous I was. I didn’t want to ruin the mood for anyone, so I just stayed quiet.

 

I was so happy, but at the same time, I envy the other guys relationships. I wish I had a relationship like Kyungsoo and his girlfriend. I love how sweet and caring she was to Kyung, and that’s what I wanted my y/n to be with me.

 

When I got to Y/N’s place, I knew they were in the shower. I could hear the water running, so I went to the couch, sat down, and waited till they got out.

 

Well, I was waiting for you. I started to think of all the times I felt like they didn’t love me or cared about me. I really hoped they loved me, but my thoughts were making me think they didn't. I thought if I should say something about my feelings, but I didn’t have the courage to say anything.

 

Y/n pov

 

After I got out of the shower and got dressed, I heard a noise coming from the living room, and I knew Jongin had just gotten back from dinner with his bandmates, so I made my way to him.

 

When I got closer to the living room, I saw Jongin sitting and taking a deep breath with a shaky sigh, and I knew there was something upsetting him.

 

So after standing in the doorway of the living room and looking at his back, I decided to talk to him.

 

When I got closer, I clearly cut my throat so he could see me and walk around the couch to sit next to him.

 

“Hey Jongin, what’s wrong? You seem upset?” I asked in a soft voice, “What’s wrong? You can talk to me; you know that, right?”

 

“Can I? Can I actually talk to you, and would you even care about what I have to say or about my feelings?” he replied in a harsh tone.

 

“Of course you can talk to me, baby. What makes you think I don’t care about what you say that?” I was confused and hurt.

 

“I don’t know, how about you tell me? Tell me why you don’t actually love me; tell me how you don’t want to hold me or kiss me; you don’t even want to spend time with me,” he said, raising his voice.

 

“Where is this coming from? When have I made you feel like that?” I replied

 

“All the fucking time, I feel like you don’t even want to date me. Since we started dating almost a year ago, I felt jealous of my friends relationships, and I even feel jealous seeing strangers with their boys or girls. I just wish we could be like them and show others that we are together and that we love each other,” he said, upset.

 

“Why have you never said anything? Why didn’t you tell me you were feeling insecure and jealous? Why didn’t you come to me and tell me how you feel?" I was upset as well.

 

“Because I didn’t know if you’d care,” he replied with a sigh.

 

“Baby, do you know how much I want to do all that, but there’s something in my past that keeps me from doing so?” I said, embarrassed.

 

“What do you mean by that?” He asked, confused.

 

“Well, a few years before I met you, I had this boyfriend who treated me badly. He hated when I tagged along with him and his friends. He hated when I tried to cuddle him or even hug him. He just hated everything that had to do with physical affection. So as time went on, he made me believe that showing my feelings for the ones I love was bad. That’s why I never did all those things in fear that you would hate them as well. I know it sounds stupid, but he was a really bad person.” I really let the tears fall.

 

“Oh Jagi, why didn’t you tell me that sooner? Now everything makes sense,” he replied as he pulled me closer to him.

 

“Jongin I do love you. I love you so much that it scares me to lose you. You don’t know how much I wanted to hug you in public or in front of your friends, but I was just scared. I’m so sorry for making you feel like I didn’t care,” I said, looking up at him.

 

"Jagi, it’s okay. Just promise me that you won’t hold back your feelings. If you want a hug, you can hug me. If you need reassurance, I’ll be here. All I want is to feel your love and affection because I love you so much that it hurts not to receive your love,” he said, kissing the top of my head.

 

“Same for you, Nini. I want you to tell me how you feel. If you think that I’m not giving you enough love or attention, don’t hesitate to let me  know." I replied back.

 

 

“From now on, I will make sure to do some. Now let’s go to bed and have a long cuddle session, and tomorrow we can go out for breakfast and then do whatever you’ll like,” he said as he got up from the couch and pulled me up with him.

 

"Yeah, maybe we can invite the boys over for dinner and play some games,” I asked.

 

“Yes, we can have a game competition between couples and see which one is the best,” he replied, excited.

 

As we walked to my bedroom, I couldn’t help but admire him. He looked happy talking about all the couple stuff he wanted to do. He looks so excited now that he finally got what he wanted.

 

He wanted to be reassured; he wanted to be told that I love him. It might have taken us a bit longer, but now we are both happy and no longer feeling trapped or anxious.

(This was trash I know but I like of love it 😅)

[kjmcotton]

✧*ૂ༄bee’s masterlist

PN: ❀ fluff ; ☾ angst ; ♢ sad ; ✩ for adults ; ♤ smut ; ♡ request

For any request ,please,check the guideline

✧ EXO

✧ Kim Junmyeon

December on the couch ♤

✧ Byun Baekhyun

Metanoia ✩ ♡

Commitment issues ☾ ♡

Unexpected gift ❀ ♡

✧ Park Chanyeol

What we did in the library ♤

A good action can change your life ❀ ♡

✧ Kim Jongdae

coming soon…

✧ Kim Minseok

coming soon…

✧ Kim Jongin

coming soon…

✧ Oh Sehun

Have a soft spot for me ❀♡

✧ Zhang Yixing

Ray of sunshine,the clouds are vanishing ❀ ♡

✧ D.O. Kyungsoo

coming soon…

✧ Specials

Halloween advent calendar🎃

[writemekpop]

Idol Spotlight | Kim Jongin (Kai)

Ay-yo! Let us take you on a journey through our fave Kai fics…

🌻 - Fluff  ☔️ - Angst  💋 - Smut

1. Dirty  💋

Summary: “All I can think about is bending you over this sink and fucking you,” Kai said. Or were you just imagining?

Genre: Suggestive, Kitchen sex 

2. Hot Mess 💋

Summary: You come home one night to find Kai naked in your bed… is he cheating on you?  

Genre: Established relationship AU, smut

3. Daddy’s Little Princess 🌻

Summary: You and your husband Kai gaze lovingly at your newborn daughter in the hospital. Only, not everything is at it seems…  

Genre: New Parents AU, Baby Daddy!Kai, Fluff

4. Kiss and Tell 🌻

Summary: Soft kisses turn into a full make-out session with Kai on the couch of a friend’s party. But someone swears they saw you on a date with Kai’s best friend just this afternoon. Chaos ensues.

Genre: Fluff

+ MAIN MASTERLIST+

[imaginidol]

Sehun: Breakup Texts

Sehun sat in between Suho and Baekhyun—on Minseok’s couch—playing a few rounds of Mario Kart with the rest of his members.

“You suck, Baek,” Suho muttered from his breath, watching in annoyance as he crossed 8th place in the final run as Baekhyun finished with 1st.

“Ha! Told you that you guys can’t beat me. Try me, try me!” Baekhyun excitedly turns to Sehun. “Sehun, race me next.”

Suho passed the controller to Sehun, but Sehun stood up and gave it to Chanyeol instead.

“What? Are you leaving?” Baekhyun asked his younger friend.

“No, but I really have to use the bathroom. I’ll race you when I get back,” he responded, giving Baekhyun a reassuring nod.

Baekhyun nodded and excitedly started punching Chanyeol’s thighs as the next round of Mario Kart begun.

Sehun excused himself and started walking out into Minseok’s hallway. When he approached the bathroom door, however, someone was ready inside.

“Hey,” Sehun lightly pounded the door, “hurry up in there!”

Suddenly, a faint buzz tickled the side of his thigh. He reached his hand into his pocket, searching for his phone.

[New Message: My Love 💞]

Sehun exhales deeply as he opens your text, realizing it was pretty late and you were probably asking where he was.

“Oh?”

What he wasn’t expecting, however, was a dull, rather empty message with the single few words that made a chill run down his spine:

[My Love💞: Sehun, I think we should breakup]

What!? Sehun feels his heart skip several beats as he feels his emotions drop immediately, both in fear and of confusion.

[Sehun: Call me.]

Sehun worriedly looked around the hallway and quietly made his way into Minseok’s empty, dark bedroom. The EXO boys were still howling in the living room, and no one seemed to notice him slip away.

[My Love💞: I can’t. I don’t want to say it again. I prefer saying it over text.]

Sehun rubbed a sweaty hand over his neck, not knowing what to say or how to properly react.

[Sehun: Why are you doing this?? Is this a prank? You know I don’t like pranks like these…]

A few seconds passed before another notification from you ensued.

[My Love💞: Please don’t ask questions. It’s a personal decision.]

[Sehun: You can’t just leave me without an explanation... is it something I did? At least give me some sort of closure?]

[My Love💞: Sehun don’t ask me anything, please]

[Sehun: but we were so happy together. We were so healthy together.]

[Sehun: Or am I wrong, were you not happy…?]

[Sehun: please answer me, say anything… is it something I can fix!?]

[Sehun: you can’t just leave me like this!?!?]

[Sehun: please??….]

Sebum’s heart was racing, and he kept refreshing your messages awaiting any response. His anxiety slowly started kicking in as the minutes passed with no response from you.

[My Love💞: <is typing…>]

[My Love💞: I’ve taken most of my things from the apartment. I’m leaving tonight.]

Sehun felt overwhelmed, covering his mouth with his right hand and looking around Minseok’s room for a tissue box. Thankfully, the boy kept one in the top cabinet of his nightstand.

Sehun reached for the box and lifted a tissue paper up to his face. Almost immediately, the silent tears started rolling from his reddening eyes.

[Sehun: please tell me at least why?]

[Sehun: you’re the only one I love. This is unexpected for me too, please understand it]

[Sehun: it’s bad enough you’re breaking up with me over text, but if it’s a problem we can fix I’ll work hard for us to get better]

[My Love💞: <is typing…>]

[My Love💞: Sehun. Gosh. I’VE FALLEN IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE ELSE]

[My Love💞: there, I said it. I never meant to purposely go out of my way to cheat on you, but it just sort of happened…]

[My Love💞: but you can’t even get mad at me because I see you so little since you’re always so busy and you’re always under so much scrutiny. I can’t take it Sehun, I can’t take your lifestyle as a kpop artist anymore. I can’t be your secret partner forever anymore!]

[My Love💞: the hiding in public, the way I have to ignore you so as to not raise suspicion, the way I have to wait around for your schedules to clear up except you’re ALWAYS busy. what am I to you? How have we even made it this long? I feel like I barely even know you!]

[My Love💞: Gosh, sorry, I didn’t even mean to lash out. I wanted to end things quickly. I wanted to be yours, with no risk of damaging an image or reputation attached. I wanted us to work, but it’s impossible because I don’t want to mess your career up. You don’t deserve it.]

[My Love💞: let’s just end it here and please block my number and I’ll block yours]

[My Love💞: don’t text me anymore]

Sehun read the last texts from you over and over again, his throat tightening more and more. The tears rolled harder, the muffled sobs grew more desperate for you.

It happened again. Again.

Another relationship I couldn’t save.

[Sehun: I’m not mad at you. I’m sorry I couldn’t do more.]

[My Love💞: <is typing…>]

[My Love💞: don’t make this harder than it already is. I won’t respond anymore.]

Sehun closed the chat and turned off his phone, wanting to desperately fling it across the room, but also feeling a need to hold onto it in case you would text him again.

But you didn’t.

Sehun sat hunched over at the edge of Minseok’s bed, elbows against his knees and hands covering his face.

The first soft whimpers of pain escaped his lips. He wept angrily at himself, not you. What could he have possibly done differently? Wasn’t the relationship going well?

‘I can’t take your lifestyle as a kpop artist anymore!”

Your heavy words repeatedly lingered on in his head. He quietly detested himself for not noticing the signs of your distance sooner.

But perhaps you were right. How could have he noticed you were escaping from his arms, anyway?

The last time you’d spoken was… almost eight days ago!

How do I fix myself? How do I fix my career? How can I live a normal life without having to hide the most important parts of myself from my own supporters!?

Sehun is too deep in his own sorrowful thoughts to notice when Minseok walks in.

“Sehun? Oh, I figured you’re in here— I’m sorry, have I interrupted something? Are you okay?”

Minseok quickly walks up to his younger friend and sits gently next to him at the edge of the bed, patting his back gently and waiting for the younger boy to speak up.

Sehun says nothing, but looks down at his phone and opens your chat again. He motions the last few messages to his older friend.

“Sehun,” Minseok reaches over to hug his younger friend, letting him calm down in his arms. “I’m here, I’m ready to listen if you need me to.”

Sehun wipes the last of his tears and shuts his phone off.

Eleven months gone to waste. I’m surprised we even lasted this long.

“Minseok,” Sehun quietly whispers, “can I ask you something?”

Minseok nods.

“Being a kpop artist was never easy. But… when does it get easier? You lose people you love because of the backlash you get from… from anything, really. But I don’t want to hide the most important parts of me anymore. What can we do?”

Minseok sighed, smiling up at his friend.

“This is more of a conversation you could one day have with Jongdae,” he smiled. “because I’m sure it was never easy for him to tell the world about his new family.”

“But,” Sehun frowned, “he got so much backlash for it. Why? Why can’t we just—“

“Sehun,” Minseok whispers, “regardless of what you do or don’t do with your life, those who truly love you will stand by whatever it is that you decide to take on next. Just as long as your choices are healthy. I’d rather get backlash for breaking out of this rigged kpop-image box and be at my happiest with one pure supporter, than to be withheld in this unhealthy parasocial image and wishing things were different.”

Sehun nods. “It… it sounds like Jongdae’s case has already started to break us from the box then, huh?”

Minseok smiled, nodding gently. “Soon, you will be able to say and share these important things in your life and not risk losing them or your career, because… well, because things will get better. Things will always get better. You’ll break the box one day, Sehun. You just have to take it one day at a time.”

[pascaloverx]

FELLINGS — EXO K.J

FINAL CHAPTER

Summary: You and Jongin live wanting what you two can't have. For example, he wants to win over your best friend and you want him.

CHAPTER THREE

Surprisingly, what happened in the elevator didn't magically make you and Jongin get together. In fact, you've been avoiding him ever since. Quitting your job kept you busy enough searching for a new one to not encounter Kai anywhere. Luna seems to want to forget what happened at her engagement party. You've been meeting quite frequently to organize the final details of her and Sehun's wedding. In fact, the wedding is happening in the next two hours, and you still haven't managed to leave the house. It's pouring rain outside, and no taxi or rideshare seems to be willing to cooperate with you today. It's almost as if fate wants you to stay home. Until you hear a car horn, and you think that Luna probably asked one of her or Sehun's friends to come pick you up. You rush down the stairs so quickly that you almost trip on the train of the dress Luna chose for you to wear as the maid of honor. This nearly impossible-to-put-on and breathe-in dress also comes with a train that nearly makes you fall when you run.

"You take my breath away. Almost literally, I believe." Kai says as he leans against the car door, holding an umbrella.

"What do you mean by that?" You ask seriously, looking at him all dressed up as he gets wet in the rain. He has his umbrella open towards you which means he's getting wet in the rain.

"I want to say that your mere existence in that dress takes my breath away. Maybe it's a bit exaggerated to say that to the woman who had sex with me and then avoided me. I didn't know you could be so cruel." Jongin says, approaching you, at the entrance to your house. You smile awkwardly. Maybe you were too quick to imagine that he would want to forget what happened in the elevator.

"I thought it would be better this way. We made a mistake and I didn't know how to act afterwards. I thought you would think it would be better this way too." You say approaching Jongin who is still getting wet in the rain waiting for you to go under his umbrella.

"Why would you call what we did a mistake?" Jongin asks taking another step towards you. You look at him without reaction, thinking about what to answer.

"You love another." You speak almost too loudly, which makes Jongin laugh. Maybe it's nervousness or the cold from the rain, but you start to shiver slightly.

"I remember telling you I loved you. Don't you remember?" Jongin asks and like a flashback snippets of the moment in the elevator come to your mind. He really said that but he said he didn't love you how you loved him.

"You said you didn't love me like I loved you. What do you want me to make of that?" Your question sounds harsher than you'd like, but the truth is, if Kai truly wanted to be with you, he would make more of an effort. Although you admit that him coming to your house, in the pouring rain, all dressed up for a wedding he probably doesn't even want to attend, makes it seem like an effort made solely to please you.

"I want you to stop making excuses to hate me and admit that you're avoiding me because you can't stand the idea that I finally reciprocated your feelings for me." Kai says, looking you in the eye, getting even closer to you. The rain is now taking over everything, and you know that getting closer to him will get you wet. But still, you challenge yourself and end up getting wet.

"And what if I just don't want to settle for someone who won't love me the way I love them? Have you thought about that possibility, big guy?" You say, getting even more soaked, at this point not even considering the slightest possibility of going to Luna's wedding like this. Fortunately, you know Luna won't need you to say she's accepting to marry Sehun. And frankly, Luna is having her happily ever after; you feel it's more than time to have yours too.

"I never thought you'd be such a coward, Y/N. Are you really that terrified of the chance of having me all to yourself?" He asks, closing the umbrella and coming closer to you. You don't even notice when his arms wrap around your waist, pulling you closer to him.

"You think pretty highly of yourself, don't you?" You say seconds before feeling his lips touching yours. It's a hungry kiss, tinged with traces of longing. You didn't want to admit it, but having Kai kiss you with such passion made you feel like you were about to explode.

"I think we both have something pending to resolve in your room. Do you mind if I carry you up there?" Kai asks, and you shake your head, not minding such an act. He then carries you to the bedroom. And the end of your story turned out to be the beginning of a romantic madness. You both sorted things out. Kai tried to convince you to come back to work for him, but you decided to work for a competitor instead. That way, your professional life wouldn't be tied to your personal life. And your personal life is definitely tied to Kim Jongin.

THE END.

[jongbross]

okay but like, imagine falling in love with baekhyun. you two meet through kyungsoo, and things just work out so well because he’s all shy around you but, once he realizes you feel attracted to him, he starts flirting with you. kyungsoo plays matchmaker and makes you two go out on a date at least once, because it’s so easy to see how you two fit each other. you’re there to support him as he puts his company up on its feet, and he starts to lean on you as you inspire him and give him the strength he needs.

all for that to fall apart once you meet jongin, the true love of your life. it’s love at first sight, not attraction like you felt with baekhyun. he’s your one and only, you can see that right away. the moment you look into his eyes for the first time, at chanyeol’s birthday, you see your whole future with him - and it seems like everyone else did too, cause you could quite literally hear baekhyun’s heart breaking when he saw the way you two looked at each other, with such love and tenderness.

[technicallymilkshakes]

Sinner

Genre(s): Angst Pairing: Kai x Reader Word Count: 500

oh you've been endless about him. imagined him breaking your heart thousands of times, but never thought it would've happened.

his hands wrap tightly around your wrists, pressing them into the mattress as he slides up your prone body. your skin erupts in goosebumps where his hair grazes you, in the wake of his breath.

"look at me," he whispers.

you laugh and close your eyes, letting your head fall to the side.

heat blooms against your sternum. your eyes flick open and down. his lips have branded you there. he licks his lips and stares down at you.

"i'm sorry."

"shut up."

"i'll make you love me again."

"i never did."

he smiles sadly.

"liar."

his fingers move in patterns along your body, mapping all your conquered spaces. you can anticipate his moves, the pressure of his fingertips, the way they dig in around your hips and splay against your rib cage. you want to scream that this isn't right. it shouldn't be.

for all the reasons you weren't supposed to love him. for pretending this was something. for the husks of promises he left behind. because he said he'd make you love him again and not that he'd love you back.

yes, once upon a time, you mistook kim kai's black hole for safe orbit.

at last, his hand comes to rest against your chest, that last remaining ocean. he bends down to press his head into his upturned palm.

"forgive me." his voice is wet and whispery. "please, don't go, please please don't go." he clutches your hands and drags them to his lips, prays over them again again again until the words are light enough to sieve through your fingers. air with no substance. but they sink into you like a weight, the reminder heavy and insistent.

it hurts. you quake, and suddenly he is holding you while you cry, through the bucking, the anger. the loneliness that goes on and on.

you feel incandescent. he's crying as if he's hurt. but who did this? who?? you've never loved anyone so much. it's all his fault, so how can you ache for him like this when you're already in such pain? how can you bear it? wanting to stay with him, to break the glass-like distance between your two bodies knowing that the loneliness will persist, will lay with you in his arms, stay there like this, suffocating you even now as you touch.

when you pull away, the gulf between you is already so vast even though you are close enough to kiss him. you see it in his eyes. that he's already registered what's happening. "please..." he says one more time.

you slip away from him, slowly pulling on your clothes. you leave him there on the bed. he watches you leave, red-eyed and immobile. it feels as if the very room is holding its breath. like night encroaching on the sun, the door closes in on him until he is just a sliver, an eye, the corner of a mouth. a possibility.

you shut the door and lock yourself in.

__________________________________ A/N: Inspired, of course, by Kai's Sinner. Thank you for reading! 🌹

[eomayas]

friendly competition • kji

pairing: kai x f!reader

genre: fluff, bit of angst and suggestive comments at the very end

synopsis: your boyfriend isn’t paying you any attention and you are upset about it!

warnings: slight angst, implied jealousy

it was wrong to have beef with a seven year old, but alas. your arms are crossed as you sit on the couch next to your boyfriend, who has your little niece in his lap as they play on her nintendo switch.

it’s been like this since you came to visit family three days ago, for the holidays. from the moment jongin walked in, all of the women in your family started fawning over him; he was so tall, so handsome, so polite, they complimented. and you didn’t mind it—of course, neither did he—but after the first day, the effect started to wear off, and you wanted every last one of them to back off of your boyfriend.

you havent had any time alone together since you got here, and that would have been fine if he wasn’t spending every moment that you both could have had together, with everybody else. if he’s not helping your mom with random tasks around the house, he’s grabbing thing off of the shelf for your aunt, and if he’s not doing that then hes sitting with your grandmother while she goes on about who knows what, and if he’s not doing that, then he’s entertaining your niece, yerim. which is most of the time, if you’re being honest.

“oh no! we lost again!” yerim says, looking up at jongin.

“it’s okay, we’ll just try again,” he says, and you roll your eyes because he’s terrible at video games, and if you niece really wanted to win, she’d be asking you to play with her. from what you’ve been hearing, this is the fourth time they lost the same level.

“auntie, can you try?” yerim asks you, shoving the switch in your face. you nod and take the gaming device snd restart the level.

“why are you actually good at this?” jongin asks as you effortlessly get through the level. you ignore him and finish the level, passing it back to your niece. she looks over at jongin with a timid look, glancin down at the switch.

“uncle nini… i think i want to play with auntie y/n instead,” she says, and you can’t help but snort at the way she’s trying to let him down easy. you glance over at jongin who glares at you, but quickly changes his expression and pats yerims head sweetly. “auntie, can we play this one?” she asks, crawling onto your lap.

you want so badly to be childish and stick your tongue out at jongin, but you don’t and instead take the switch out of her hands and help her win.

“y/n!” your name is called from the kitchen. you tell yerim that you’ll be back and quickly find your mother in the kitchen.

“yes?” you question, already washing your hands.

“help me cut up these vegetables, please,” she says, nodding with her head at an array of food on a cutting board.

“surprised you didn’t ask jongin,” you mutter, grabbing a knife and starting on the cucumbers.

“what did you say?” your mom questions, glancing at you over her shoulder.

“nothing,” you reply, busying yourself with the task of chopping. your mother leaves the kitchen to go back outside to the garden, where she got most of these vegetables and where most of your family is hanging out.

a few minutes later, you hear footsteps and assume it’s your mom so you don’t look up. it’s only when a gentle hand is placed on your waist that you jump and turn around, the sweet face of your boyfriend smiling down at you.

you almost smile back, until you remember that you’re having a one-sided issue with him, and turn back around. “what’s the matter, babe?” jongin questions, rubbing his hand in circular motions on your side.

“nothing, are you bored?” you ask sarcastically. jongin quirks an eyebrow behind you but doesn’t question your tone.

“kinda—yerim went out with her parents, and took her switch with her,” he says, moving to lean against the counter. you hum and finish your last vegetable, tossing everything into a bowl for salad.

jongin watches you closely, his arms crossed lowly over his chest. he watches how you snap the lid on the bowl with extra force, how you nearly throw the cutting board and knife in the sink, how you slam a drawer for seemingly no reason. “y/n?” he says, standing up and reaching for you, but you spin away from his touch, and he frowns. “are you mad at me?” he asks, trying to meet your eye.

“no,” you say, and it’s true. you’re not mad, you just miss him and want him back to yourself.

jongin starts to question you again, but is interrupted by your mom, who says his name with too much enthusiasm for somebody who has seen him all weekend. “jongin, sweetie, can you grab me the blender from up there, please?” she asks him, and you take the opportunity to slip out of the kitchen and go upstairs.

you head to your room, where you change into something more comfortable and then lay down. you scroll aimlessly through your timeline, liking and commenting on your friends’ posts.

about ten minutes later, a light knock sounds against your door. “yes?” you say, lifting your head from the pillow. the door opens and jongin steps inside, closing the door behind him.

when you see that it’s him, you lie back down and go back to your phone. “honey, why are you ignoring me?” he asks, sitting next to you and rubbing your back. “why are you mad at me?”

“i’m not mad,” you say, not looking at him. jongin sighs and gently wrestles your phone out of your hands, putting it on the table next to you. you cut your eyes at him, and he lovingly strokes the side of your face. you can’t help but wrap your hand around his wrist, leaning into his touch.

“then why are you being like this?”

you scoff. “like what?” you question. jongin chuckles at your oblivion, pushing hair away from your face.

“you’re all pouty and sulky,” he says and you roll your eyes, even though he’s getting you good. “just talk to me, baby.” he says, and you can’t deny that face of his.

“it’s embarrassing,” you say, turning your head so it’s smooshed against pillows.

“so?”

you sigh dramatically and press you face harder into the fabric. “i miss you,” you say, your voice muffled by the pillows.

“what? i can barely hear you,” jongin says, trying to pull you up from the bed, but you don’t budge. instead, you groan into the pillow and say, “i miss you” much louder.

jongin smiles behind you, giggling at your admission. “it’s not funny,” you mumble, but he can’t help himself because you’re so cute when you’re like this.

“y/n, please look at me,” he says. you sigh and peel yourself away from the pillow, turning your head so you can look at him properly. “it’s not embarrassing, it’s cute.” he says and you scream and roll away from him, making him laugh harder and pull you towards him again.

“you’re making me feel worse,” you moan, letting him pull you up and into his side.

“i’m sorry, but you’re just so cute right now. and to be fair, i miss you too,” he says, kissing your quickly on the lips.

“yeah? well, why won’t you hang out with me?” you ask, looking at him in his eyes.

“i’m getting to know your family,” he says, pinching your side, making your fold into him. “don’t tell me that you’re upset about that?” jongin adds when you roll your eyes.

you sigh and adjust so your back against his chest, and you’re sitting between his legs. “i’m not… i just miss you, okay? and everybody loves you and that’s great, but i want to spend some time with you too,” you say, your head resting on his shoulder. “and every time i get you alone, it’s for a few seconds.” you rant. jongin wraps his arms securely around you, rubbing his thumb against your forearm.

jongin only hums, not really understanding why you’re so upset, other than you’re jealous of the attention he’s been receiving from and giving to everybody else. “baby, if you want my attention all you have to do is ask,” he says, but when he says ask, all you hear is beg, and make a face. “but if it helps i miss you too.” he adds, kissing your cheek.

you sigh at his admission and lean your head back to look up at him. he smiles and kisses your lips, one of his hands gently resting on your throat. you can’t help but put your hand on top of his and close his fingers around your neck, the back of it hurting from the angle it’s at, but you don’t care.

snaking one of your hands around the back of his head, you pull him impossibly closer to you and tangle your tongues together. his free hand slides up your chest and gropes one of your breasts. you brace your hand on his leg and revel in the way he twitches against you when you drag your hand closer to his crotch.

unfortunately, your moment together doesn’t last long. “uncle nini!” yerim shouts, banging on the door and startling you both and making the two of your knock your teeth together.

“ow,” you say, pressing your hand to your upper lip and frowning. jongin grumbles behind you and slides out of the bed. “bye!” you say bitterly, lying back on your side.

jongin leans down and places a kiss on your forehead. you put a hand on the back of your neck to hold him a little longer, but again it doesn’t last long. “uncle niniii!” yerim yells again.

he pulls back and kisses your forehead. “i’m yours tonight,” he whispers, leaving you with a smile on your face as he runs to go entertain your family.

[loeyshandtattoo]

the lady of moonreach

SECOND CHAPTER, Whispers in the Shadows

chapter summary: Namra still insists on the restoration of Moonreach, and manages to have an upper hand with her new friend, despite that, it doesn't grant her the immunity from the members of the council, not even the feelings that she is slowly growing for the king-conqueror. wc: 3.7k

THE MORNING SUN CAST ALONG THE SHADOWS AT STONEHEARTH, where the scars of war were still evident despite the city's efforts to heal. As I walked through the bustling streets, the contrasts were stark—rebuilt homes and vibrant markets stood side by side with remnants of past destruction. Chanyeol and I had made headway in revitalizing the capital, but the crucial matter of Moonreach loomed large over our efforts.

That is why, the council again has called for a meeting, and this time it was to make peace on the incident the other day about the supposed plans on Moonreach's restoration initiative.

In the council chamber, Chanyeol sat at the head of the table, his gaze fixed on the array of documents before him. The tension from the previous meeting still hung in the air, the friction between us palpable. Junmyeon, Chanyeol’s advisor, was present, and his role in our current predicament was undeniable.

From what I know, Junmyeon owns a piece of land in the Verdantia, where the House Baek rules over in the confines of Greenwood Keep, and Junmyeon managed to have owned hectares of land and named the estate, Eldergrove Keep. His political background is quite remarkable given his family history, whom have been a loyal political advisor to the king, but at this case, he trusts my side, and that is the one he's about to defend in this meeting.

“Moonreach needs to be our priority,” I said firmly, breaking the silence. “It’s not just a castle; it’s a symbol of our commitment to the northern regions and to the legacy of Lord Greenwell.”

Chanyeol looked up, his eyes narrowing. “Namra, I’m aware of its significance, but resources are limited. We can’t simply divert them from other pressing needs.”

Junmyeon interjected smoothly, “Lord Greenwell’s estate was more than just a symbol; it was a vital strategic location. Restoring Moonreach could stabilize the northern regions and reinforce our control there. It’s not only about sentiment; it’s about strategy.”

Chanyeol’s jaw tightened. He was clearly struggling with the implications. “Fine. We’ll allocate the resources for Moonreach. But you, Namra, will need to oversee the process.”

I nodded, meeting his gaze steadily. “I’ll handle it.”

As the meeting concluded, the strained atmosphere between Chanyeol and me was almost tangible. His reluctance was evident, but I was determined to press on. The urgency of the restoration was more than just a task—it was a mission driven by personal stakes and the memory of Lord Greenwell.

As we exited the council room, Chanyeol’s gaze lingered on Junmyeon. There was a flicker of irritation in his eyes, an insecurity that had become more pronounced since our earlier discussions. I could sense the undercurrent of rivalry, a tension that went beyond mere politics.

In the corridors, Chanyeol caught up with me, his expression resolute. “Namra, don’t think for a moment that I’m underestimating the importance of Moonreach. But I need you to understand that this kingdom’s survival is at stake. Every decision we make has consequences.”

His voice was clipped, his frustration barely contained. “I understand,” I said, matching his tone. “But Moonreach is not a luxury; it’s a necessity.”

Chanyeol’s eyes met mine with a mix of defiance and something softer—a flicker of understanding perhaps, buried beneath the surface. “Very well. I’ll support your efforts, but don’t expect me to stand idly by if things go awry.”

Right after the conversation, he returned to his office, where he can continue stressing over the political matters of the kingdom.

The corridors of Ironhold were abuzz with the muted echoes of footsteps and murmured conversations. The high ceilings and grand tapestries spoke of a bygone era of opulence, but the current atmosphere was heavy with the weight of political tension. As I walked through the hallways, my mind was preoccupied with the recent council meeting. The debate over Moonreach had not only been a professional ordeal but a deeply personal one.

Finally, things were turning to my favor.

I turned a corner, my steps slowing as I saw Junmyeon waiting near a grand window overlooking the courtyard. His presence was calm, his demeanor always one of composed authority. His sharp eyes met mine as I approached, a subtle nod acknowledging my arrival.

“Namra,” Junmyeon greeted, his tone warm but measured. “I was hoping we could talk. The council meeting seemed particularly intense today.”

I offered a small, appreciative smile. “Yes, it was. I’m glad you’re here. I was hoping to discuss the next steps for Moonreach. There’s still so much to be done, and your input has been invaluable.”

Junmyeon gestured for me to follow him to a quieter corner of the hall, away from the bustling activity. We stood by a large map of the kingdom displayed on the wall, a detailed depiction of the land with various territories marked.

“I’m glad to see that Chanyeol has agreed to prioritize Moonreach,” Junmyeon said, his eyes scanning the map. “It’s a crucial step, not just for the northern regions, but for the entire kingdom’s stability.”

I nodded, appreciating his continued support. “Indeed. But there are still obstacles—both logistical and political. I worry about the challenges ahead.”

Junmyeon’s expression turned thoughtful. “Restoring Moonreach is more than a symbolic gesture; it’s about reinforcing our northern defenses and showing our commitment to those who have been loyal to the crown.”

I glanced at him, sensing a deeper understanding in his words. “You seem particularly invested in this. Why?”

Junmyeon looked at me with a hint of surprise, then offered a small, almost self-deprecating smile. “You’ve caught me. My family’s history has always been intertwined with the political landscape of Iris. My estate, Eldergrove Keep, has been a center of strategy and diplomacy. Supporting Moonreach is not just a personal favor; it’s a way to ensure that the northern regions remain stable.”

“Your support has been crucial,” I said sincerely. “But I can’t help feeling that there’s more to it. Your involvement seems… personal.”

Junmyeon met my gaze steadily. “Perhaps. I believe in what Moonreach represents. It’s a symbol of resilience, and with the kingdom’s future so uncertain, we need every symbol of strength we can get.”

I sighed, feeling a mixture of relief and uncertainty. “Chanyeol’s reluctance has been palpable. I can sense his frustration, especially with how closely you and I have been working together.”

Junmyeon’s eyes softened with understanding. “Chanyeol has his own burdens to bear. The pressure of leadership can be overwhelming, and sometimes it manifests as frustration or insecurity. His struggle with prioritizing Moonreach is a reflection of his broader concerns for the kingdom.”

We stood in silence for a moment, the gravity of our conversation sinking in. Junmyeon’s presence was a comforting constant amidst the chaos.

“I appreciate your perspective,” I said finally. “And I’m grateful for your support. It means more than you know.”

Junmyeon offered a reassuring smile. “We’re all in this together, Namra. The kingdom’s future relies on our collective efforts. If there’s anything more I can do to help, you have my word.”

As we continued to discuss the finer points of the restoration and strategy, the connection between us grew stronger. Junmyeon’s support was not just political; it was a genuine commitment to the kingdom’s wellbeing, and it was clear that our shared goals were forging a meaningful alliance.

The conversation eventually drew to a close, and as I prepared to leave, Junmyeon gave me a final, encouraging nod. “Keep pushing forward. We’re making progress, and every step counts.”

I watched him walk away, a sense of determination settling within me. The path ahead was fraught with challenges, but with allies like Junmyeon by my side, I felt a renewed sense of purpose. As I moved toward the next task, the halls of Ironhold seemed a little less daunting, knowing that support and understanding were within reach.

Chanyeol's POV

As I returned to the comfort of my office, my thoughts were clouded by a mix of frustration and something else—an unfamiliar sense of vulnerability. The tension between Namra and me was more than just professional; there was an undeniable personal undertone that I struggled to understand.

The way she spoke about Moonreach with such fervor, her unwavering dedication—it was both admirable and unsettling. I couldn’t help but feel a pang of jealousy whenever I saw her interact with Junmyeon. Their camaraderie, their shared understanding—it was a stark contrast to the growing distance between Namra and me.

I found myself staring out of the window of my chambers, lost in thought. Junmyeon’s influence and his closeness to Namra made me uneasy. I recalled a moment from our earlier discussions, where Junmyeon had subtly encouraged Namra’s efforts. There was something almost calculated in his support, and I couldn’t shake the feeling that his motives were not entirely pure.

I recalled a memory from a few weeks ago, when Junmyeon had suggested a strategy that had seemed to benefit both parties. At the time, I’d appreciated his insight, but now, with Namra so closely involved, I wondered if his intentions were more self-serving. His history with my family, his unspoken ambitions—these were the shadows lurking in the back of my mind.

The way Namra and Junmyeon had spoken in the council hall, the ease with which they exchanged ideas—it made me question my own position. My feelings for Namra, a strange mixture of admiration and frustration, only added to my insecurities.

I was beginning to realize that my feelings towards her were not as straightforward as I had assumed. There was an undeniable connection, a growing sense of respect that bordered on something deeper. Yet, every gesture of support seemed to come with a price, a reminder of the political and personal complexities we faced.

As I turned back to my desk, I felt the weight of the kingdom’s challenges pressing down on me. My thoughts were tangled with doubts about Junmyeon’s true motives and the growing closeness between Namra and the advisor. But beneath it all, there was an undeniable yearning for something more—a connection that transcended the political strife.

Somehow, I refuse to believe that it's anything more than having certain deeper feelings.

Namra's POV

As days passed, Chanyeol’s demeanor remained guarded, but small gestures began to shift the dynamic between us. He made an effort to consult with me directly about the progress of the restoration, and there were moments when his attention seemed to soften, if only slightly.

One evening, as I reviewed plans for Moonreach, Chanyeol appeared at my side. “How is the restoration progressing?” he asked, his voice betraying an uncharacteristic note of concern.

“It’s coming along,” I replied, glancing up. “But we’ve encountered some obstacles. We need additional resources to address them.”

Chanyeol’s brow furrowed. “I’ll see what I can do. We can’t afford delays.”

The brief exchange was loaded with unspoken tension, but beneath it, there was an undercurrent of mutual respect. Chanyeol’s willingness to assist, even in small ways, hinted at a growing recognition of the importance of our shared goals.

In the council room, Junmyeon continued to play a pivotal role, his influence evident in the strategies we implemented. Chanyeol’s frustration with Junmyeon was palpable, but there were moments when he acknowledged the advisor’s contributions, if begrudgingly.

Meanwhile, the situation in Dawnspire remained tense. Lady Ambers was grappling with political instability, and her challenges were a stark reminder of the broader issues facing the kingdom. Chanyeol’s focus on these issues sometimes overshadowed his interactions with me, but there were brief instances where he seemed to appreciate the gravity of our situation.

As I worked tirelessly on the restoration of Moonreach, the weight of the task was ever-present. The castle’s rebuilding was more than a physical endeavor; it was a symbol of hope and renewal for the kingdom. And despite the ongoing friction, Chanyeol’s sporadic gestures of support hinted at a slowly thawing relationship.

The early evening light cast long, dramatic shadows through the grand windows of Ironhold, painting the stone floors in warm hues. The hallways were quieter now, the clamor of the day giving way to an eerie calm. I had been heading towards the archives to review the restoration plans for Moonreach, seeking solitude amidst the castle’s grandeur.

As I rounded a corner, I nearly bumped into Chanyeol, who had seemingly appeared out of nowhere. His sudden presence made my heart skip a beat. I looked up into his intense gaze, and for a moment, time seemed to stretch between us.

“Namra,” he said, a hint of surprise coloring his voice. “I didn’t expect to see you here.”

I stepped back, regaining my composure. “Just heading to the archives. The restoration plans need my attention.”

Chanyeol’s eyes narrowed slightly. “I was actually on my way there myself. Perhaps we could walk together? It’s been a while since we had a chance to talk without the usual constraints.”

His suggestion was unexpected, but I agreed, and we started down the corridor side by side. The space between us seemed to crackle with an electric charge, our proximity heightening the tension.

“I’ve been thinking,” Chanyeol began, his voice low and deliberate, “about our last conversation. You were quite insistent on Moonreach.”

I turned to face him, meeting his gaze with equal intensity. “Moonreach isn’t just a restoration project. It’s a symbol of hope and commitment. It’s personal.”

Chanyeol’s expression hardened momentarily. “Personal, yes. But what about the broader issues? The instability in Dawnspire, for instance—are they less important?”

I chose my words carefully. “Every issue is significant, but Moonreach holds a deeper meaning for me. It’s not merely about strategy; it’s about honoring a legacy.”

Chanyeol’s eyes darkened, his internal struggle evident. “And yet, sometimes I wonder if you’re more invested in this project than in the kingdom’s other needs.”

Before I could reply, we reached the archives. The room seemed too large and impersonal for the conversation we were having. Chanyeol’s eyes met mine with a mixture of frustration and something else—an unspoken vulnerability.

“Perhaps we should continue this conversation somewhere more private,” he suggested, his tone softer but charged with an edge of tension.

We found a small, secluded study room just off the main corridor. The room was dimly lit by the soft glow of evening light filtering through the narrow windows. It was intimate, the warmth of the setting creating a cocoon around us.

As we entered, Chanyeol’s demeanor shifted subtly. He leaned against a table, his posture relaxed yet exuding an air of controlled intensity. “Namra,” he began, his voice dropping to a hushed tone, “I value your dedication, but I can’t shake the feeling that there’s more behind your actions.”

I stood close to him, the proximity causing my pulse to quicken. “And what makes you think that?”

Chanyeol’s eyes bore into mine, a storm of emotions swirling beneath the surface. “It’s the way you speak of Moonreach. As if it’s not just a task but a deeply personal mission.”

The space between us seemed to shrink, the air growing thicker with tension. Chanyeol’s gaze flickered between my eyes and my lips, his breath coming slightly uneven. “Sometimes,” he continued, his voice almost a whisper, “I feel like there’s a part of you that’s deliberately hidden.”

The moment hung heavy with unspoken tension. Chanyeol’s vulnerability was palpable, and I could feel the magnetic pull between us. The briefest touch of his hand against mine sent a shiver down my spine.

“I’m driven by my commitment,” I said, my voice low and steady. “But if you feel there’s more, you should be open about it.”

Chanyeol’s gaze lingered on me, his expression a mix of frustration and something softer—an unspoken longing. “Perhaps you’re right. But it’s hard to ignore the way we seem to clash and connect simultaneously.”

Our faces were inches apart now, the warmth of his breath mingling with mine. The tension was almost unbearable, and I could see the struggle in his eyes—an internal battle between restraint and the pull of something deeper.

Before I could react, the door creaked open slightly, a distant sound breaking the moment. Chanyeol took a step back, his expression a conflicted mixture of desire and frustration. “We should focus on our tasks,” he said, his voice returning to its usual clipped tone. “There’s too much at stake.”

I nodded, trying to steady my own racing heart. “Yes, of course. We both have our roles to play.”

As we left the room, the silence between us was charged with the residue of our interaction. The connection was undeniable, yet shrouded in the uncertainty of what lay ahead. Chanyeol’s guarded demeanor and the intensity of our exchange left me with a sense of anticipation—and a lingering tension that promised further complications.

However, a part of me can't help but of the feeling being watched. As if someone is monitoring my every move, and that wants to make me plan step ahead.

Third Person POV

As dusk fell over Stonehearth, the grand halls of Ironhold were cloaked in shadows, the fading light casting eerie patterns on the stone walls. Junmyeon, having just finished his duties for the day, decided to take a walk to clear his mind. His thoughts were still occupied with the ongoing tensions between Chanyeol and Namra, as well as the looming threat of unrest in the kingdom.

He wandered through the dimly lit corridors of Ironhold, taking a path he rarely used. His steps were muffled by the thick carpets that lined the halls, and the soft glow of wall sconces provided just enough light to navigate by. As he approached a secluded part of the castle, he noticed a faint glow coming from under a door slightly ajar.

Curiosity piqued, Junmyeon moved closer, pressing his ear against the crack of the door. Through the narrow opening, he could hear the low murmur of voices. The room on the other side seemed to be a private chamber, often used for discreet meetings. Junmyeon’s instincts told him that something significant was happening behind that door.

Carefully, he inched the door open just enough to peer inside. What he saw made his pulse quicken.

One of the councilors, a burly man with a scar across his cheek, was speaking in hushed tones.

“We can’t let this opportunity slip away. With the unrest in Dawnspire and the focus on Moonreach, this is the perfect time to act.”

A second councilor, a woman with sharp features and calculating eyes, nodded in agreement. “The kingdom is divided. Chanyeol’s obsession with Moonreach has left other regions vulnerable. If we make our move now, we could strengthen our position significantly.”

Junmyeon’s eyes narrowed as he listened intently.

“We need to leverage this,” the burly councilor continued. “If we can undermine Chanyeol’s support in the northern regions, we can weaken his hold on the throne. Our allies in the northern territories are already feeling the strain. We just need to push them further.”

“The resources being diverted to Moonreach could have been used elsewhere, possibly in ways that would benefit us. We can’t let him consolidate his power too easily,” the first voice continued.

"The restoration plans should not be overlooked as well. See to it that what can be done to weaken the loyal alliances of the conqueror should remain that way."

"Agreed. The northerners have always been the easiest people to deal with especially now that we have the Lady of Moonreach at the palm of our hand."

Another councilor, a younger man with a nervous demeanor, chimed in. “And what about the reports of Chanyeol’s increased consultations with Namra? It seems he’s growing closer to her. Should we be concerned?”

"Definitely, saw each other earlier, the king-conqueror is on his knees for the beauty of that whore."

The woman with the calculating eyes leaned in. “Good. We’ll use that to our advantage. If Chanyeol’s focus is divided between Namra and the kingdom’s issues, he’ll be more susceptible to our plans. We need to keep an eye on their interactions and find a way to exploit any weaknesses.”

Junmyeon’s mind raced as he absorbed the conversation. The loyalists were not only scheming to strengthen their position but also to exploit the growing tension between Chanyeol and Namra. Their plan was more dangerous than he had anticipated, involving manipulation and strategic moves to destabilize Chanyeol’s rule.

Realizing the gravity of what he had overheard, Junmyeon quietly withdrew from the door, careful not to make any noise. He needed to report this information to Chanyeol immediately, but he also knew that he had to tread carefully. Revealing that he had been eavesdropping could raise suspicions and complicate matters further.

The evening’s revelations only deepened the intrigue and danger surrounding the kingdom, and Junmyeon knew that the coming days would be crucial in determining the fate of Iris.

He knew what must be done.

Namra's POV

As the night continue to grow, I walked beside Asia through the dimly lit corridors of Ironhold. The weight of the day’s events lingered, casting a shadow over our conversation. Chanyeol’s reactions, the looming issues with Moonreach—everything seemed to be tangled in an intricate web.

After hearing of what had happened between Chanyeol and I, Asia whispered my name.

“Namra,” Asia said quietly, her voice breaking the silence. Her tone was serious, and I could sense the weight behind her words. “We need to talk.”

I looked at her, noting the concern etched on her face. “What is it?”

Asia hesitated, choosing her words carefully. “I’ve noticed how close you’ve become with Chanyeol. I just want to remind you of something important.”

I frowned, my curiosity piqued. “What about Chanyeol?”

Asia’s expression was a mix of worry and resolve. “You need to be careful. I understand that there are feelings involved, but you have to remember why we’re here. It’s easy for emotions to complicate things, and I wouldn’t want that to jeopardize what we’re working towards.”

I took a deep breath, trying to understand her perspective. “I’m trying to keep my emotions in check. It’s just that… sometimes it’s hard to separate everything.”

Asia’s gaze softened. “I know it’s not easy. But our focus needs to remain clear. We can’t let personal entanglements distract us from our goals.”

Before I could respond, Asia signaled that we had reached our destination. “Junmyeon is expecting us. He wants to meet us in the observatory tower.”

The observatory tower was a secluded place in Ironhold, offering a panoramic view of the city. It felt like an appropriate setting for a private conversation.

As we entered the tower, Junmyeon was already there, standing by the large window that framed the night sky. The room was dimly lit, the glow of lanterns casting soft shadows across the stone walls.

“Namra, Asia,” Junmyeon greeted us with a nod. “Thank you for coming.”

I nodded back, exchanging a glance with Asia before we moved closer to Junmyeon. His demeanor was serious, and I could sense that he had important information to share.

“Before we begin,” Junmyeon said, his voice low, “I need to bring something to your attention. There are troubling rumors circulating among certain factions within the council. It seems that some members are plotting against Chanyeol.”

My heart skipped a beat. “Plotting against Chanyeol? What do you mean?”

Junmyeon’s expression darkened. “I’ve overheard discussions suggesting that there are plans to undermine his authority. The details are vague, but there are hints of a scheme to discredit him and destabilize his rule.”

Asia’s eyes widened slightly. “And who’s behind this?”

Junmyeon shook his head. “I don’t have a clear answer yet. It could be individuals who are dissatisfied with the current leadership or who have their own agendas. What’s certain is that Chanyeol is at risk.”

I exchanged a worried glance with Asia. This revelation was unsettling, and it only heightened the complexity of our situation. “What should we do?”

Junmyeon’s gaze was firm. “For now, we need to be vigilant. I’m working on gathering more information, but I wanted you both to be aware of the potential threat. Keep your eyes and ears open.”

As Junmyeon spoke, the cool night air from the observatory window seemed to chill my bones. The stakes were higher than I had imagined, and the sense of urgency was palpable.

When the meeting concluded, Asia and I left the observatory, the weight of Junmyeon’s words hanging heavily in the air. The cool night breeze did little to ease the tension. I could sense the danger that loomed over us, a shadow of uncertainty that added to the already complicated situation.

Asia’s earlier warning about maintaining focus seemed even more relevant now. As we walked back to our quarters, the city of Stonehearth spread out below us, its lights twinkling in the distance. The path ahead was fraught with challenges, and the potential threat against Chanyeol only added to the precarious balance we needed to maintain.

"I need to leave for Silverhaven immediately," Asia announced as we found the comfort of our bedchambers.

I took a deep breath, "Why, I need you here at this time and hour."

"As Lady of Silverhaven, I must ensure that my domain remains loyal and secure. We can't afford any surprises."

I felt a pang of anxiety. "Be careful. We don't know who might be involved in this plot."

Asia flashed me a reassuring smile. "I'll take every precaution. And remember, stay vigilant."

With that, Asia prepared to leave, her departure adding another layer of urgency to the situation. As she gathered her things, I felt a lingering growing sense of unease.

The morning sun spilled its warm light over Ironhold, casting a gentle glow on the bustling city below. The air was filled with the soft murmur of early activity, a stark contrast to the tension that had characterized the past few days. As I stood at the gates of Ironhold, I felt a pang of sadness mixed with resolve. Today was the day Asia would leave for Eldoria, and I was determined to make sure she departed with all the support she needed.

Asia approached, her travel attire neatly pressed and her expression a mix of determination and nostalgia. She carried herself with the grace of someone who was both a noble and a warrior, her presence commanding respect and affection. Her dark hair, tied back into a practical braid, framed her face, highlighting the seriousness of the mission ahead.

"Namra," she said softly, embracing me in a tight hug. "This is a crucial time for us. I’ll gather as much intel as possible and rally our forces. We can’t afford to endanger Moonreach—it’s too important." Her voice was steady, but I could sense the weight of the task she was about to undertake.

I nodded, holding her close for a moment longer before stepping back. "I know you will," I said, trying to inject confidence into my voice despite the heaviness in my heart. "Your presence in Eldoria is vital. Lord Roderick and Lady Eveline will need your support, and I trust you’ll convince them of the urgency. Moonreach has been our home for the past five years, and it’s a part of us. We must ensure its safety."

Asia’s gaze softened as she looked at me, her eyes reflecting both affection and a shared sense of purpose. "I still remember the look on his face when he adopted us," she said with a wistful smile. "Lord Greenwell took us in when we were just lost souls, and he gave us a place to call home. We owe it to him—and to ourselves—to protect it."

The memory of Lord Greenwell’s kind eyes and the warmth of his embrace flashed in my mind. He had been a beacon of hope in our lives, offering us sanctuary and a new beginning. It was this very memory that fueled our determination to see Moonreach restored and safeguarded.

"We do," I agreed, my voice trembling slightly with emotion. "And we will. The future of Moonreach depends on us. We must ensure that the restoration is not just a physical rebuilding but also a symbol of hope for the kingdom."

As the carriage prepared for departure, Asia adjusted her cloak and gathered her belongings. Her resolve was evident in the set of her shoulders and the determined sparkle in her eyes.

"I’ll be in touch," she promised, giving me a reassuring nod. "Stay vigilant, and don’t let your guard down. The situation is delicate, and we can’t afford any missteps. Oh, and Namra, we keep our blades sharp."

With one last embrace and a final exchange of determined glances, Asia climbed into the carriage. The vehicle, drawn by sturdy horses, began to roll out of Ironhold, leaving a trail of dust in its wake. I watched it disappear down the road, feeling a mixture of pride and apprehension.

As the carriage vanished from view, I turned back towards Ironhold, steeling myself for the challenges ahead. Asia’s departure was a crucial step in our strategy, but it also marked the beginning of a new chapter in our fight to secure Moonreach and restore our home to its former glory.

Moonreach has been our home. It always has been. My thoughts drifted back to the moments right after my father’s death. I vividly remembered being taken by Ser Gareth to my sister for safety. Ser Gareth, now serving diligently as a Queensguard in Eldoria, had always been a pillar of strength. His commitment to his duty was unwavering, and I knew he continued to do his utmost best, improving with each day.

Despite the reassuring memories of Ser Gareth’s dedication, my mind kept circling back to that fateful evening months ago. The image of smoke swirling in the air, the roaring flames consuming everything in sight, and the blurred exit as I desperately sought escape were vivid and haunting. The destruction of Moonreach was a tragedy I could never fully erase from my mind.

“In the moon’s shadow, we stand strong.” Our house motto echoed in my thoughts, a constant reminder of our resilience. It was a mantra that had guided me through the darkest times. Standing strong wasn’t just about physical fortitude—it was about inner resolve and the determination to rebuild what had been lost.

The decision to return to Moonreach was not made lightly. It was a choice that required days of contemplation, a recognition of the urgent need to restore what was rightfully ours. As I packed my belongings, preparing for the journey back to Skybound, I felt a mixture of resolve and apprehension. Moonreach needed me, and it was my duty to ensure its revival.

Returning to Skybound would also provide me with the opportunity to set clear boundaries with Chanyeol. Our recent interactions had been fraught with tension, and I needed to establish a more defined separation between our personal and professional relationships. The complexity of our situation required a clear focus on the task at hand, without the added confusion of personal emotions.

As the carriage that would take Asia to Eldoria disappeared into the distance, I took a deep breath, steeling myself for the challenges ahead. Moonreach awaited, and the path to its restoration was fraught with obstacles. But with the motto of my house guiding me, I was determined to face whatever lay ahead and honor the legacy of those who had come before me.

[kpopimaginings]

Reassurance - Kai (Jongin)

You're being stupid. That's what you keep telling yourself. Kai is an idol, sometimes he is going to be around female idols, he is going to do dance challenges with them or talk to them, he can't exactly snub them. You couldn't help but compare yourself to them though. You trusted Kai, you really did, but sometimes, when your mental health was bad and the insecurities kicked in, you felt like he could do better than you.

When you were next with Kai, you were so stuck in your head about everything he noticed how distant you were being.

"Jagi?" he asked you, when you made no reaction to his hand on your thigh as you sat together on the sofa.

You simply hummed in response.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing," you answered, far too quickly for it to be the truth.

"Come on, something's bothering you," he said giving you a little nudge.

"I don't want to talk about it," you replied, bluntly.

"I just want to help," he continued.

"Jongin, let it go," you snapped.

"Fine," he muttered, moving away to sit on the other end of the chair to you.

"Talking about it will just upset me, so I don't want to right now, you don't have to be like that."

"You don't have to snap at your boyfriend when he's trying to help."

You let out a frustrated sigh. "Don't try and guilt trip me."

"What can't you talk to me about? Am I the problem? Because if I am that's more reason to talk to me," he continued.

"No, not exactly-"

"Yah! What do you mean not exactly?"

"See this is why I didn't want to talk about it."

Kai stood then and moved in front of you, making sure you couldn't look away from him. "What did I do?"

"Nothing."

"Then what did 'not exactly' mean?"

You hesitated then. He clearly wasn't going to drop it, so you were trying to work out how to put your feelings into words.

"Y/n?" he questioned.

"I don't like seeing you with other women," you rushed out, before realising how that sounded. "Wait- no, that didn't-"

"Because you don't trust me?"

"That's not what I meant. I just think- It's hard for me seeing you with these beautiful idols, when I'm- me."

"You think I'd cheat on you?" he questioned in an accusatory tone.

"No! It's not about you-" Your voice raised as you spoke.

"Then what is it about?"

"If you calm down and let me get my words out..."

"You didn't even want to talk to me a second ago."

"I can't talk to you when you're like this," you said, your tone dropping as you stood to head to the door.

Kai stayed stationary for a moment as pulled your shoes on. Before you had a chance to gather up your things though, he was next to you holding your bag. The two of you just stood looking at each other in silence briefly.

"What's wrong?" he asked again, his voice now much softer.

"It's not that I think you would cheat. It's that I believe you'd be better off with one of them. I look at myself and then these gorgeous women you're surrounded by in your working life and I can't compare. I don't feel like I deserve to be with you."

"Jagiya," he let out in a whisper.

You sniffed as the emotions started to hit you. "And this is why I didn't want to talk about," you managed to say as your voice broke.

Immediately, you were engulfed in your boyfriends arms as you broke down.

"I love you," he mumbled as he pressed small kisses in to your hair. "I love you, and I'll keep saying it until all those thoughts leave."

You just held onto him tighter as he spoke, giving you the reassurance you so clearly needed in the moment.

"Anytime you feel this, you tell me. Even if I'm not with you and you've seen something, some video online, and it makes you uncomfortable, call me. I will remind you that you are the one I will always choose, ok?"

All you could do was nod.

"Do you want to take your shoes off and come back in?"

You nodded again.

Kai's chest vibrated against you as he laughed. "You need to let go then."

This time you shook your head and snuggled further into him, if that was even possible. With another laugh at your cuteness, Kai squeezed you back, content just to hold you until you were ready.

NAVIGATION  |  EXO MASTERLIST  |  SUPERM MASTERLIST

[yeolsaintlaurent]

yeolsaintlaurent's MASTERLIST

Series

Nocturnal Reverie - PCY :ongoing: *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ Chapter 1: City of Shadows Chapter 2: Unveiling Secrets Chapter 3: A dangerous game begins Chapter 4: Unveiled Desires Chapter 5: Operation Shadow Veil Chapter 6: Threads of Deception and Dilemmas Chapter 7: Echoes of the Past Chapter 8: Unexpected Encounter Chapter 9: Harmony in Midnight melodies Chapter 10: Glimmers of recognition Chapter 11: The Message

Crimson Veins, Midnight Flames - BBH :paused: *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ Chapter 1: Freshman Impressions Chapter 2: Intoxicated Whispers of Realities

~New Series Coming Soon

[andimoon]

Hi! How are you? I really love your work and got excited when you posted that you’re taking requests 😊 Can I have Kai, angst and smut, no. 26. Been missing this guy lately 🥹🥹🥹 thanks so much! Hope you have a great day/night!🤍🤍🤍

Hello lovely anon! Thank you so much for the request! It turned out a little bit more fluffy than I was planning but I had a lot of fun writing this one!! I hope you enjoy! 😁💛

Word count: 2.5K

Warning: t/w: Kai Military Service, Graphic Tasteful Smut, 18+

Jongin/Kai X Reader

Established relationship au, LDR, switch King, mild Fem-Dom inclinations.

Angst/Smut

26. “Make Me”

It had been three months almost to the day. Three months since you last saw your boyfriend’s lovely face in person. Since you last saw the cute little half moons of his eyes and those pearly white teeth as he smiled at you. Since you heard that sweet laugh from his lips. Three months since you felt his warmth envelope you, wrapped in the soft sheets of your bed. Three fucking months. You knew why he left. Even if it wasn’t your culture, you understood the reasoning behind it, but that didn’t make the distance any easier. Even prioritizing work and returning to your own home didn’t make it easier.

The only thing keeping any semblance of sanity inside your brain were the late night calls. The small texts occasionally sent when he had the time to do so, the little I love you’s and I miss you’s, reminders of how you were on his mind. Your body was beyond the point of withdrawals, the desperation to see him, to hold him, it blinded you to everything and soon you found yourself on a plane, ready to see him.

Jongin would be excited to see you, right? If your distance was agony to you, it must’ve been the same for him. Still, you couldn’t help the bob of your leg, or the need to constantly twist and turn and adjust the ring on your finger.

“A ring? You’re not proposing are you? I’m not ready for that.” The memory of his laugh, his sparkling smile and the way his arm felt warm and heavy on your shoulders.

“It’s a promise ring,” he held your hand up in his, admiring the way the silver piece looked around your finger, “I’m promising that I’ll always be on your side, even if I can’t be there in person. You’ll always have a little part of me with you.” You recalled the excitement in his eyes and the way his words took your breath away and made your heart skip a beat. “Do you like it?”

“I love it, Nini.”

You wished you would’ve gotten him something in return for the promise, but you never got the chance to. All too soon you needed to return home and he needed to serve. You would make up for that this time and show him how much you loved and missed him. Your resolve; a party for two. You were certain that if you called your boyfriend and told him you were in town he would drop everything, so you needed to prepare everything first. A few stops later and you had everything you needed to make your night a success. Groceries for a home cooked meal, check. Candles and bath bombs, check. Now you just needed a gift.

The path to his house was one you knew like the back of your hand. You’d practically lived there for the spring, but as you walked past the shops and vendors, a jewelry store on the corner caught your attention. You couldn’t buy him a ring. His fans might see it and get angry, but maybe you could give him something else. A promise could be made with anything. The staff greeted you as soon as you walked in and you bobbed your head in their direction before letting your eyes wander the glass casings of silver and gold and jewels.

Your ring was elegant but simple so you wanted to pick something that would match well with it. Couples jewelry. Your eyes lingered on a simple silver bracelet and you imagined how nice it would look against his skin. How he could wear it with anything and everything and always have a little part of you with him. It was perfect and you bought it without so much as a glance at the price tag. You did not need to know how deep a hole it would make in your wallet.

Maybe showing up unannounced at his house was a bad idea. What if he was home? You shot him a quick text and tried to disguise your question as innocently as possible.

‘Nini, where are you? What’re you doing?’

A few seconds later,

‘Almost done for the day.’

So he was still training, that bought you probably twenty minutes? It might not be enough to make everything you wanted before he arrived, but he’d have time to shower and change before spending the evening together. Just as quickly another text shot up.

‘I’ll call you when I’m out.’

‘I miss you.’

You smiled warmly at the message as you input the code to his front door and stepped into his home.

‘I can’t wait to hear your voice.’ You responded with a little heart. He would be so surprised to see you.

Time passed so quickly, you were rushing to get everything finished. His home was a mess as it usually was, so you picked up a few things, set up some mood music and lighting with the candles you purchased. Now it was a race against time to finish cooking before your boyfriend finished training. As if on cue, his face lit up your phone screen and the little device vibrated aggressively on the countertop. “Hellooo,” you hummed out as you answered the call, stirring the stew you were making.

“Babe,” he greeted, voice tired and an octave lower than usual. It gave you chills and you smiled, “I miss you,” he complained again and you could hear the pout in his voice. “I’m on my way home. What’re you doing? Working still?” It sounded like he was getting into a car as he spoke and you checked your watch. You probably had enough time to finish everything and greet him when he arrived.

“I’m cooking,” you responded honestly, “I was really craving a stew, so...” You heard him groan on the line and the dramatics made you laugh.

“Oh that sounds so good. I miss your cooking. Ah, my stomach is growling now. I should order something when I get home.” He would be so surprised when he saw you, the anticipation left you smiling and nibbling on your lower lip. You loved your calls with Jongin. You loved how you could talk about anything and his reactions were contagious and comforting. “I'm home now. I’ll call you later tonight, okay? I love you!”

The call ended and you rushed to the restroom to freshen up a bit before you were to greet your boyfriend. A nervous burn in your stomach and your heart was beating so hard you were sure it was trying to force its way through your rib cage. After a quick splash of cold water you returned to the living room, surely he was almost to his apartment. You charted the path from the garage to the elevator to his apartment in your mind, mentally tracking him like a gps. He should be opening the door any second.

Minutes passed. Maybe he was stopped by someone to talk. He was famous after all. Ten minutes. Twenty minutes. Thirty.

Time passed as you sat in his living room, fiddling with your ring and staring at the door. Forty minutes, fifty. An hour. The more time passed, the more worried you became. What if something happened to him? In an instant the phone was in your hands and you were dialing. You waited and it kept ringing. Right when you were about to hang up, the speaker was filled with noise. Laughing, clanking, talking. “Hey! Sorry, I met up with the guys for dinner. Can I call you later?” He was laughing and the way his words slightly slurred told you he had been drinking.

“I thought you were home.” The seriousness in your voice caught his attention and you heard a muffled excuse and movement. Suddenly everything got quieter.

“Are you okay?”

“I thought you were home.” You reiterated with a sigh, dragging a hand down your face. This was your fault. You never told him you were there, it was in his own right to do what he wanted with his time off, but it still felt like you’d been stood up. “I’m at your house,” you said plainly, “I was cooking for you, Nini.”

The silence between you was deafening and you let out another soft sigh before forcing your voice to come out sweeter than you felt at the moment, “Its okay, I didn’t tell you so I’ll just put it in the fridge and—“

“I'm on my way.” The call ended with those four words and the sudden heaviness in your chest was uncomfortable. You were excited to see him, but felt bad for ruining his plans. Would he be upset? Would he feel sorry? You wanted this to be the perfect evening and it would’ve been if you had just told him. It would’ve still been a surprise if you had just told him.

The food was cold by the time he arrived. The door swung open aggressively and your gorgeous boyfriend stood at the entrance, catching his breath with his skin flushed and wide crazy eyes looking around until they touched yours. His uniform was inviting your eyes to linger but you couldn’t look away from the intensity with which he pinned you under. You stood from the couch as he marched over to you. He looked upset and you instantly dropped your gaze, ready to apologize for the unnecessary drama caused by your impatience, but before you could speak his arms wrapped around you so tightly, a hand on the back of your head pulling you into his chest and his face nuzzled in your neck. His warmth and the faint smell of alcohol overwhelmed you. He was here. He was touching you, holding you, and he was really here.

You both stayed like that for a while, “I’m sorry,” his voice muffled into your shoulder, “I’m glad you’re here.” It was so nice to be in his presence again. To have your boyfriend physically, tangibly there. The months of distance left you drained and deprived of his touch, and everywhere his skin touched yours tingled and blazed. Your heart raced as he lifted his head to meet your gaze and the silence told you he felt the same. It was mesmerizing the way his eyes dilated the more he studied your face. The food was already cold and sitting on the countertop in the kitchen. You felt his fingertips brush your hair back and the warmth of his palms as he cradled your jaw, his eyes lowering to your lips. It was hard to breathe. If you didn’t put the meal away soon, it would go bad. All be damned if the entire hour and a half of stress cooking went to waste.

“I—“ you gulped down the saliva that pooled on your tongue, the back of your throat felt dry. Jongin stood frozen in front of you, his gaze lifting comfortably to touch yours and his eyebrow twitched up questioningly. Fuck you needed some water. “I need to put away… the food.” You hesitated as he inhaled a deep calming breath and leaned away from you. His warmth was gone and you had to fight your hand as it reached for him. He was trying to hold himself together, you should do the same. “Did you eat already? I cut your night short, right? Are you hungry?”

His eyes snapped to yours and your rambling stopped. “Yeah, I’m hungry.” He said after a beat, quickly swooping you up over his shoulder and making a beeline for his bedroom.

“Wait! Nini, wait,” you said after the initial shock was gone and patted his back a few firm times, “Put me down. I have to put the food away first.” His eagerness was cute and it would be a lie if you said you didn’t enjoy being carried like you weighed nothing. Even your voice carried your smile. “Put me down, yeah?”

At first you thought he would listen to you, but he adjusted his grip on your hips, “Make me.” The way his voice dropped and the clear seduction in it dumbfounded you, even as he eased you into the soft mattress and leaned his weight over you. The clear smirk on his lips as he loomed over you, “Why? You can’t?” He leaned in closer until you felt his hot breath against your ear, “Do you feel it too?”

A shuddered gasp escaped you and the small sound he made told you that his ego was thoroughly stroked by his power over you. You wanted nothing more than for him to take you right then and there, but where would be the fun in giving in so easily? You admired the way his intensity faltered under your touch, as you eased your cold fingertips under that perfectly fitted uniform. The way his breathing hitched and his eyes shuttered closed the further down your fingertips traveled, the ethereal way his skin glowed with that perfect flush. God, how you wished you could capture this moment, it would fuel you for the next three months.

His warmth fit snugly in your hand and the breathless whine he let out left you dizzy and intoxicated. Your kiss was forceful and wanting, his symphony inviting your body to join and fuck how you wanted to, but first you wanted to watch him fall apart under your grasp. The ridges of his skin felt familiar under your fingertips and your mouth watered. You felt his hips buck against you, thrusting into your grip ever so slightly between rigid gasps and hisses. He looked like an angel, tasted like heaven on your tongue. His desperation matched yours as you rocked together. With his new uniform you could kiss and suck at his neck and collarbones, leaving flowers peppering on his skin, and he’d be able to cover most of them.

It was hard to get a good momentum going with his pants in the way and you huffed in slight annoyance against his lips, blindly searching for the pesky button that stopped you from accomplishing your goal. Teeth and plush lips, the delicious elixir that coated his tongue. With every brush and squeeze his hips rolled against your touch and his growls were like music to your ears.

He leaned back on his knees with a disgruntled sigh that desolated somewhere deep inside his chest, and your hand slipped out of its confines and rested on his thigh. His eyes were heavily lidded, shining onyx in dilation. The plump skin of his lips swollen and red from your insistent biting. What you would give to have them between your teeth once more. His chest heaved and he made a show out of unbuttoning the troublesome piece with that fucking smirk. You reached for him again but he collected your wrists and pinned them above your head, leaning into you with intensity that hitched your breathing and you inhaled sharply. “That’s enough of that. My turn.”

[pascaloverx]

FELLINGS — EXO KAI

CHAPTER THREE (+18)

Summary: You and Jongin live wanting what you two can't have. For example, he wants to win over your best friend and you want him.

Warnings: This fanfic will describe some hot romantic moments and use of inappropriate language. In the future there may be both smut and moderate use of violence. Readers are warned. This fanfic will feature some members of EXO as characters but they are not part of a Kpop group in this scenario. This chapter has scenes for adults, minors should not interact.

CHAPTER TWO FINAL CHAPTER

Nearly two weeks later, you and Kai barely talk. It would be a lie to say it's been easy. God, this idiot was more a part of your life than you realized. But this whole situation has been awful. Especially because every day he tries to convince you not to quit the job, not to give up on him. Every day your desk with a bouquet of flowers and a note asking you to reconsider. One of the perks of being Kim Jongin's secretary was that you knew exactly where he would be. Which means avoiding him was easy. And your notice period is almost over anyway, so now it's just a matter of enduring a little longer. Even though it's your last week of work, you're still one of the last ones to leave the building. Like today. Kim Jongin spent the day in meetings outside the company, so you had to handle several things. And now you're standing in front of the elevator, waiting to go home. Until the elevator doors open, and you come face to face with him. Your boss and ex-best friend, the one who recently discovered your involuntary crush on him.

"I think I'll take the stairs." You say, stepping away from the elevator door, but Jongin grabs your arm, and you look at him.

"Can we talk?" Jongin asks, and before you know it, you're already inside the damn elevator. You glare at Jongin angrily, frustrated that you can't avoid him anymore.

"You never struck me as the type of guy who doesn't understand signals. Me avoiding you and not responding to your ridiculous notes accompanied by flowers worth more than my entire salary wasn't enough?" You reply angrily, watching the floors pass by and avoiding looking at Jongin in every way possible.

"And you never struck me as such a passionate person. I mean, you throw at me the fact that you love me and that what Luna and I are doing is stupid, and you don't even give me a chance to try something different." Jongin responds, trying to approach you. You know he wants you to look at him.

"Since I'm basically already fired, I'll tell you something. You think everyone has to give you a chance because you're handsome and rich, but that's not how the world works. You got me into a ridiculous situation, and now you must be feeling guilty. But that changes nothing. The best thing we can do is to get out of each other's lives." You basically overflow with relief after finishing saying everything you think. To the point that you look at Jongin to see his reaction. He seems a bit surprised, and then, as you both lock eyes, the elevator experiences a mechanical failure. The lights go out, and you hear a loud noise.

"Are you okay?" Jongin asks immediately as you stare into the darkness inside the elevator. Before you can respond, the lights inside the elevator come on.

"I'm okay, but you have a cut on your head. Are you feeling alright?" You ask, touching near the small cut on Jongin's head. He mutters a curse when you touch him, and you feel sorry for him.

"Couldn't be better. You're looking at me again." Jongin says, smiling mischievously. You glare at him, disapproving of what he said. What if he's got more than just a cut on his head?

"I'll try to call for emergency assistance. Make sure you don't do anything risky while I make the call." You say, knowing he likes to play the hero sometimes. Unfortunately for both of you, your phone signal isn't working. It's as if fate wants you two to be stuck together. You look at Jongin and mention that he's observing you. He also tries to call for emergency assistance but without success. However, he seems more resigned to the situation than you are.

"I guess this time, you won't be able to escape spending some time with me, sweetheart." Jongin says, taking off his jacket and adjusting his turtleneck shirt in the most sensual way he can. You shake your head, trying to shake off these thoughts.

"And why does it seem like I'm the only one not wanting this to happen? You should be trying your hardest to get out of here, Kim Jongin." You say seriously, settling down beside Jongin, who is leaning against the elevator.

"Maybe it's because for the past two weeks, all I wanted was to be alone with you. And in a rather radical way, that's what's happening." Jongin says, looking at you. You feel embarrassed and shy away from his gaze.

"Why did you want that so badly?" You ask, smiling slightly. Perhaps now you're compelled to have a heart-to-heart conversation with Jongin.

"You told me you loved me. And then, without giving me time to process that, you started pulling away from my life. I spent years seeing you every day. I missed you. Damn it, I even missed your scent. The truth is, being without you is driving me crazy." Jongin says, looking you in the eyes, as if he wants you to see the truth. To see that he's being sincere.

"Kim Jongin, you only miss me because I make your life easier. It's not quite genuine longing." You respond, trying not to feel too affected by what he said. But it does affect you; he manages to ignite a very powerful feeling within you with just a few words.

"That's our biggest problem here. You don't believe me. But you know what, screw it. I love you. Not in the way you love me, but I do. And you matter to me, whether you like it or not." Kai says as he watches you. You're speechless, just looking at him and him looking back at you. Until your eyes land on Kai's lips, and you feel like if you don't do something now, you'll explode. So you push Kai against the elevator and kiss him. An uncontrollable kiss. You didn't even know you could kiss someone with such intensity. The intensity becomes so great that you have to lean on the elevator to keep your balance. Kim Jongin holds you, lifting you up and making you tie your legs to the around him. The kiss doesn't stop, it's almost as if you're thirsty for each other. You lift his shirt and seconds later he's shirtless. He then pulls down your panties. There's a lot of rush, so you barely notice when Kai puts a condom on his dick. But seconds later, he slowly approaches you with his pants open and inserts his dick into you. You let out a drawn out moan as you feel him slowly thrust into you. You nibble on his neck, bringing him closer to you. You're horny so you start to help Jongin with the movements, getting up and down on his lap. He holds the hem of your dress up and presses your ass with his hands. You kiss him again. And again. His lips taste like chocolate. A few more thrusts and you cum. Almost in sync. He gives you a kiss on the mouth as if to end it. You look at him noticing that you guys actually had sex. Before any of you could say anything, like magic, the elevator started working again.

[rancidtae]

ARCADIA’S LULLABY | CHAPTER 5

Genre: Mafia AU. Vigilante AU. Sci-fi (AI). Warnings: ANGST. fluff. mentions of near-death experiences. mentions of drug use. emotional tension during breakfast. chanyeol crying. Pairing: exo & Original Female Character (Jung Jiah/Kang Rina) - Kim Minseok/Original Female Character - Zhang Yixing/Original Female Character Word count: 11k+ chapter summary: the one where shit gets real and sehun just wants everyone to talk about their feelings and let him have his breakfast in peace. a/n: WE'RE SO BACK. (we're so over) but make it old-friendship-turned-sour core.

guess what you need isn't always what you want from me

masterlist - meet the characters

082809 - 5:34 pm.

13 years ago

“Yo, open up.”

It was the third time he knocked.

Chanyeol pressed his ear against the wood and heard the muffled murmur of a news anchor.

“C'mon, I can hear the TV, I know you’re in there.”

Not one to be patient when people were purposefully being assholes, he fished the set of spare keys Mr. Kang gave his mom from the pocket of his ripped jeans and jingled them extra hard. Just to piss her off and warn her.

“Wow, this is depressing.” he blurted out, closing the door behind him.

His 15-year-old neighbor did not look surprised, nor tried to pretend that his presence wasn't unwanted. Chanyeol, however, had never worries about being on her good side. They'd been annoying each other all their lives.

Tall piles of books covered the living room, some even went over his head. They were playing videos of the memorial with the president giving a speech in the background on the TV. A steaming bowl of noodles and some side dishes waited on the small dining table.

It was the anniversary of the Seoul Metro bombings. 

As always, every year the city shut down for the memorial. No one was allowed to forget such a dark stain on the country’s history. Over 900 casualties, even more injured.

Chanyeol remembered the day of the attack. His mom rushing to pick him, his sister Yoora and Rina from school, earlier than usual. She didn't answer their questions until they got home and she locked the door behind her. Mr. Kang didn't pick up Rina until the next afternoon, and he looked like a ghost.

That was the day he learned the meaning of the word terrorism.

He took a look at the family picture by the entrance and picked up the remote, turning the TV off.

“What is that?” Rina suddenly asked, making him jump on his feet.

She was curiously looking at the pale pink box under his arm, and it took him a second to remember he'd brought it with him. With every year that passed, Rina only looked more and more like her mother, the resemblance was scary sometimes.

He fixed his throat. “Pastries from Swimmy’s”

Of course, she knew that. It was her favorite bakery.

Rina, however, turned around with feigned disinterest.

“Ah. How’d you even get them? Aren’t they closed today?”

“I don’t know. Yoora’s boyfriend sent them, but she hates him right now so she gave them to me.”

“Cupcakes?” she asked over her shoulder, rattling things inside the fridge.

“Multiflavor.” he nodded, fighting back a cruel grin when she stills.

“You want some?” she asked, pointing at the bowl of steamy noodles.

Chanyeol couldn't remember her ever willingly offering him a bite of anything.

“Nope, I’m good.” he chirped.

Her face dropped. Suddenly deciding that there's nothing inside of her interest, she slammed the poor fridge door.

“Ok, let’s go,” he finally said, feeling like he annoyed her enough for the day. He did not lie when he called the scene depressing.

Her sitting down on the floor and eating overcooked noodles alone when there was a perfectly nice summer afternoon right outside kind of softened his heart.

“Where? Why?”

“Seriously? We’re not gonna sit here and eat them alone, that’s some loser shit. Plus, it’s way too much sugar.”

“It’s not” she protested, struggling to put on her worn-out white Converse.

“Maybe not for me, but it is when you spend your life slugging inside. When’s the last time you went for a run, huh?”

Naturally, they ended up making their way inside Arcadia, her father's arcade spot just a few blocks away. They entered through the backdoor, using Rina’s spare key that she religiously wore around her neck.

Baekhyun nearly landed on his ass when he noticed movement out of the corner of his eye, hand to his chest when he recognizes them and immediately lighting up at the prospect of eating pastries.

Rina found a seat on the countertop, while Chanyeol brought two chairs for himself and his legs from the backroom. Baekhyun picked up his copy of Rebirth and saved his strawberry-flavored gum for later, carefully wrapping it in a sticky note, much to Rina's disgust.

The three indulged in a cupcake each, humming in bliss.

“So," Baekhyun smacked "where you been?” 

“Busy.” she said, legs swinging happily, licking buttercream off her pinky finger.

“Doing what?"

"Stuff."

"Like what, sleeping inside a coffin? You look like you haven’t seen the sun in months.”

Chanyeol agreed. “You’re gonna regret staying inside once we’re back to school.”

Rina was not about to tell them she'd been reading those books at home, one per day like an apple. Her father kept bringing new ones, leaving them stacked up on every surface he could find, building a labyrinth out of them.

The last was Fahrenheit 451. Baekhyun would've liked it if, but he was more of a manhwa guy.

She took a look around the room, all the machines were on. She remembered something. “Wait. Why are you working today?”

Baekhyun pointed one finger at the door. The open neon sign was off, and the door was locked. “I'm not. My aunt and my cousins are visiting and I needed some alone time. And they’re all on because–”

“He doesn’t like the silence.” Chanyeol said, mockingly, with his cap on sideways and clearly finding Baekhyun childish.

“Please don’t tell your dad.” he requested with his customer service voice. “That reminds me, you think he’ll give me a raise if I ask him?”

“Aren’t you only covering shifts for Yuan? I don’t think he even knows you work here.”

He did not take well to that. Sitting up straight and dropping what was left of his cupcake on the box, he put his hands on his waist.

“Only covering– what are you talking about? I know this place better than Yuan ever could. I’m more of an Arcadia member of staff than he is or could ever be” he started counting down with his fingers, Rina took a deep breath. “I’m the general manager, I’m HR, marketing, I’m the cleaning and security staff, I keep an eye on Mintchoco at the back and even–”

Thank god, a knock at the front door interrupted his rant. Jongdae was leaning over the glass, cupping his face and pointing at the lock on the door. Minseok stood just behind him on the sidewalk.

Standing up with a groan and still complaining about the disrespect under his breath, Baekhyun let them in.

Minseok was hugging a ball against his side, had dry blood on his left knee, and his usually squeaky clean soccer shoes and white socks all dirtied up. Jongdae was no better, face dripping in sweat, fanning his shirt, complaining about the heat.

“Swimmy’s?” Minseok asked, eyes wide.

“Like I said” Baekhyun continued. “Arcadia is me. I am Arcadia. I know the consoles. I love this place. This is like home to me. I absolutely, totally, most definitely deserve a raise.”

“If you love it so much shouldn’t your pay be enough?” Asked Jongdae, standing under the a/c vent.

“Right. He makes a good point. You should be doing it for free, even”

Baekhyun glared at Chanyeol. “So what are you suggesting? Unpaid labor? I have a family to feed.”

“Your parents do the feeding in your family” Laughed Minseok, asking Rina to pass him a strawberry cupcake. One of the same strawberry cupcakes Rina had threatened Baekhyun and Chanyeol not to touch.

Chanyeol gave her an odd look, she pretended not to notice it.

“Just say you’re saving up to buy yourself a laptop.”

“That I will get my hands on soon if our dear Rinrin here tells Mr. Kang how good of an employee, and friend I am.” he paused. “Maybe just mention the employee part, nepotism goes against my values.”

"Ok” she agreed. But then she crossed her arms and lifted her chin, and Baekhyun’s cheerful grin crumbled. “But you’ll owe me”

“Ah. What’s this?” he sucked on his teeth “I thought we were friends.”

"You said nepotism goes against your values.”

“So you’re blackmailing me.”

“We’re negotiating.”

“Woah. This is unbelievable. You're really growing into an evil little thing.”

"Speaking about evil little things, we saw your boyfriend on our way here. He was totally asking to get his ass kicked.” said Jongdae through a full mouth. “Ith wath him, right Mintheok?”

Minseok tried to telepathically get him to keep his mouth shut, but he kept going, clueless.

“Looked like he pissed Youngjae off again. You know how he hates being stared at”

By her boyfriend, they were talking about Kyungsoo, who was nothing of the sort. He was, though, known for being excellent at getting on the bad side of people. It wasn't his fault, some just read him wrong.

Kyungsoo was just misunderstood. Often. And Youngjae was a bully.

“And now she has been summoned. Our peace maker.” Chanyeol announced, watching her expression drop. She jumped from the counter and started putting her hair up on a ponytail.

Extra tight, extra high. She meant business.

“Wait. For real?”

“You know, just because you’re a girl and your dad’s a teacher it doesn’t mean Youngjae and his friends won’t beat you up one of these days” Jondgae called out, finally noticing his mistake.

“Hold on, wait wait wait! You’ll tell your dad, right?” Baekhyun asked, watching her walk behind the counter and get the pepper spray from its secret spot.

“You’ll owe me.” she said, and walked out of the door.

The guys saw her cross the street and disappear from view.

"What was that?" asked Jongdae.

"Pepper spray."

Chanyeol groaned. “Dude, why did you tell her? Mr. Kang’s gonna be upset if she’s home late.”

Jongdae did not take well to that, and quickly started firing back questions about how is it his fault that she likes to take on other people's problems.

Sighing, Minseok rubbed the crumbs off his hands and silently made his way to the door.

“Really, you too?”

Minseok shrugged. “She shouldn’t be going alone. And you shouldn't have let her take the pepper spray.”

Jongdae, not at all surprised, only shook his head and stuffed his mouth with another bite. The outcome came as no surprise, he was just glad that the possibility of Rina getting in trouble and Mr. Kang being upset about it had significantly decreased.

Minseok wasn't much of a fighter, but he knew how to make younger kids respect him.

“Are these fresh?” Jongdae was frowning at the cupcake. “How’d you even get them today?”

“Mr. Kang asked me to pick them up. I don't know how he did it, but he got them to bake these for him.” Chanyeol answered, pausing for a bit before adding. “He asked me to get her out of the apartment.”

Jongdae and Baekhyun nodded in understanding, no more questions on the subject were asked.

081322 - 05:12 pm 

Consciousness comes in waves.

First, pain. Second, something warm and blinding.

Sunlight.

Third: white.

The room slowly comes into focus. White walls. Wood framing the window. Sheer curtains.

Fuck. It really fucking hurts.

She can deal with that. The disorientation? That’s different.

A burst of anxiety threatens to come to the surface at once.

Everyone has cycles waiting to be kickstarted at the beck and call of the smallest trigger. Good or bad, but most importantly, unavoidable.

Jiah spent a good chunk of her life testing out remedies for the bad ones. Prescriptions. Therapists. Thoughtfully curated lists of habits; healthy for the long term, destructive for a quick fix. 

And even though nothing could have prepared her for this, time has worked on her.

So as the events from last night come back to her and the doorknob turns with a click, she stays calm and lets her eyes close again.

The person lingers for a moment, doing god knows what. His shadow flickers through her eyelids. Eventually, she’s alone again.

When she opens her eyes again the drowsiness has faded. There’s a classic mid-century flip clock on the nightstand. A piranha plant figure stares back at her with its teeth all bared out, and her transmitter’s politely placed next to it.

She knows right away whose bed this is.

Painfully, she props herself up to a seated position and inspects the sling and the dressed wound. No ethical doctor’s gonna give her the dose of painkillers she’ll need for that.

She’s wearing a thin, depressing hospital gown, and that will not do.

He's definitely loaded. The house is enormous, enough to get lost in and fit her apartment maybe five or six times. Several doors line down the hallway leading to a vast, asymmetrical set of stairs. Vaulted high ceilings top up a communal area, with a long skylight that washes everything in abundant natural light.

She pads down the stairs, following the sound of voices and laughter.

And there he is, stomping out of what looks like some kind of office made of glass walls.

“Hey, hey, wait. No. That is not fair, how was I supposed to–”

He locks eyes with her.

Bewildered. Like he forgot she was there and that just a few minutes ago he was in that room with her.

She looks back at him, like she didn’t know it was him the second her eyes landed on that piranha plant.

A tremor goes through his body before he starts coughing violently.

“Fuck— what the fuck?” more coughing, he plucks something from his mouth. A ridiculously chunky piece of pink gum covered in thick saliva.

Heads turn at the rough edge of her voice “That’s what happens when you try to chew a whole wheel of hubba bubba tape at once.”

Byun Baekhyun stares back at her like she just said the most offensive thing possible, gum still between his fingers.

“Well you can’t just stand there and– lurk looking like– like Shanks and not expect to scare the shit out of innocent people.”

Two figures by the kitchen entrance watch them. One looks kind of confused, the other one crosses his arms and holds back a smile.

“One Piece? Are you twelve?”

“Says the grown woman who can’t get her arm through an oversized sleeve.”

“I'm wearing a sling, you asshole.” she snaps. Baekhyun looks down at the fluttering sleeve, sucking in his lips between his teeth.

And then, like switch is flipped, their expressions shift. Her brows soften, and a wry grin tugs at the corner of her lips. A lighthearted smile spreads across his face.

Jongin gives the person next to him a bewildered glance.

“What’s up with the hair?”

Baekhyun runs his fingers through it. “You don’t like it?”

“Let me rephrase that, did you go to Lady’s Room and talk to the girls?”

Silence.

“I don’t know what–”

“You still touch your hair when you’re lying.”

“Ok. Yeah. No.” He points a finger at her “You’re not going Sherlock on us when you just woke up after a near-death experience.”

“Says who?”

“Says me," he snaps with an attitude, quickly adding “Doctor’s orders.”

“So first Yixing’s a cop and now you’re a doctor?” Startled, Baekhyun opens his mouth and closes it. “What’s next, Kyungsoo’s a wedding planner?”

“Youth pastor, actually. Very successful. The youths love him. And I could be a doctor if wanted, by the way.” he scoffs.

She cocks an eyebrow.

“Whatever. Ah, this won’t do. You suck at reunions. Go back upstairs, we’re doing this again.” he waves his arms at her, urging her back up the stairs. Surprised, she spurts out a laugh. The rebound pain from her shoulder makes her stop and hiss.

“Alright, leave her alone.” 

That face she’d recognize anywhere. It’s unfair that they’ve all aged so nicely. Kim Jongdae looks like an upgraded version of himself, just with different hair and somehow, better skin.

“How are you feeling?”

“Lucid enough to steal my clothes, clearly.”

She realizes she's been staring at him like an owl and fixes her throat.

“Been better.” she nods, bowing quickly, awkwardly waving at the end. “Hi.”

Baekhyun snorts. "Did you just bow?"

Jongdae bows back and waves, amused but ignoring Baekhyun. “Wanna take a seat? I bet you're starving.”

She’s famished. The thought of food is enough motivation to postpone the thinking about everything that is happening right now. And since she's not escaping anytime soon, she might as well acknowledge the other person in the room.

“So, is Jongin your real name, or is this another Juyeon/Sehun thing?”

The kitchen is ridiculously huge, with another skylight at the top and an island at the very center. She sits down, leaving an empty stool between her and the impostor, who shares a look with the other two men.

“Yixing slipped up, wasn't hard to figure out.” she explains.

Jongin fixes his throat. “Jongin is my real name.”

“And how do you know Taemin?”

“We used to go to the same dance studio for a while.”

“And he just introduced us. By coincidence.”

Baekhyun steps in. “You had a horde of mercenaries on your track. We were trying to get them before they got you and Jongin was there to keep an eye on you. Him being Taemin’s friend was a happy coincidence.”

It's not convincing at all, and the thinking starts.

That’s for being so fucking stupid. Do you realize what you got yourself into?

Go ahead, big guy.

“Where’s Chanyeol?”

“What, are we not enough for the welcoming party?”

Jongin, however, knows what she's thinking. She doesn't like it.

"It wasn't him. The man in the bathroom came with backup. We thought we’d handled all of them, but a stray one took us by surprise and shot you.”

“I mean, we can show you the footage of him following the guy.” Baekhyun offers immediately. “But come on, you don’t think he–”

“No need.” patching her up defeats the purpose of taking her down, but that doesn't make up for several loose ends. “However, the manhandling was unnecessary.”

“You did kick Jongin in the balls.” Jongdae reminds her, putting a glass of cold water in front of her. 

“If you guys knew I was being followed then why didn’t you just give me a heads up?”

How did they know?

And where’s the rest?

Baekhyun smiles. "You made it abundantly clear to Yixing that you didn't want us near."

"So why didn't he come?"

“He was out of town, but he asked you to be careful. Several times, he said.”

He did. And she rejected his attempts at helping her beyond getting Haneul protection. Several times indeed. He was very insistent. She brushed him off every time.

Disoriented, she sticks to nursing her glass of water in slow sips. Several details keep her alert.

One, eyebrows/Tuxedo Mask/Sehun had or has been protecting Lee Chungjae, despite Yixing’s insistence that they’re not involved with his people.

Two, Baekhyun definitely went sniffing around Lady’s Room, and if she knows anything about him, he didn't just stop at that.

Three, Junmyeon and Minseok are members of the syndicate.

The sound of a motorcycle roaring outside grows closer and gets her out of her head. The conversation has moved in a completely unexpected direction without her.

“This might be out of my expertise, but I don’t think you can compare periods to getting shot.” Jongdae says, unbothered by the noise.

“Why? Blood is blood, no matter where it comes from” Baekhyun argues. “And I’ve heard scary stories about cramps” 

The steel door is slid open just enough for a tall man to come in, balancing piled up pizza boxes and complaining about someone needing to lube up the damn rail.

“This is the last time you use me as a delivery guy” he declares, dropping the boxes on the counter. He stops when he notices her. Stoic as ever, a face impossible to forget. “You look rough. Bet you wish you listened to my advice about not getting in the way of bullets.” 

She frowns, but then another figure walks in. He's holding two helmets, sliding the door shut with a nudge of his shoulder. He takes a look at her, evidently unimpressed.

“I heard you were begging to see me. How you managed to live all these years without me, now that’s an unresolved mystery, one of many.”

“I don’t know how I held up, honestly” she replies, voice flat. “Every day I woke up feeling like my life was missing something.”

“Poor thing.” He tsks, mockingly pouting at her, hanging both helmets on the wall. “But I heard you’ve had some interesting characters keeping you company, so at least you weren't lonely, right?”

The bitter undertone is unexpected.

“Rin,” Baekhyun calls, a smile on his face, and a sideways less friendly glare at Chanyeol. “You still like orange soda, right?”

They move like protocol, opening the boxes and taking drinks out of the fridge, Jongin walks out of the kitchen after losing a match of rock paper scissors to Jongdae.

Chanyeol stares at her like she's about to stab someone. The pizza looks too good for her to care.

“So, up to anything exciting?” 

“Not much. You?” 

“Oh, come on. Half of the city’s freelancers are searching for you as we speak. Those were some expensive mercenaries following you around.” 

“Makes you wonder how shitty the cheap ones must be.” she points out.

“You also looked too calm for someone who thought she had a gun pointed at her face.” he finishes, folding a piece of pizza in two and devouring half of it with one generous bite. "Definitely wasn't your first time."

“I didn’t think you had it in you.” she shrugs, taking a first bite. It's good. She has to close her eyes and sigh for a moment. “And it wasn’t my first time, he ruined my favorite jacket the other night, remember? Got my ear ringing for a few days.”

Sehun shrugs. "You got in the way."

“Right, how’d that happen anyway?” He points at his big ass ear. The left one. Eyeing hers like he didn’t get the point across. Her hair is covering the transmitter, but of course, they don't need to see it to know it's there.

She snorts, not amused at all. “Aren’t you too comfortable?”

Jongdae calls his name, something like a warning. Chanyeol drops the subject and focuses on getting his hands on a second slice, Sehun chuckles at the scene.

“You guys couldn’t wait for us?”

Jongin reappears, followed by a familiar face that feels like a punch to the chest.

His eyes scan the room, curious about the sudden silence. It ends when he notices her. There's a flicker there, but whatever he's really thinking is quickly guarded by a stoic expression.

“Why is she here?”

“She’s feeling fine,” Baekhyun shrugs. “I’d be dying to get out of bed after 15 hours of sleep too.”

Do Kyungsoo offers no answer, doesn’t even spare her or Baekhyun another glance. He washes his hands in silence, takes the spot next to Jongin, grabs a slice of pizza for himself and that's that. Her eyes stay on him, surprise slowly dissolving from her face.

And then Baekhyun claps, starling her.

“Shit, I almost forgot. Dessert first!”

It happens at once—a sloppy plan set in motion by Baekhyun’s insistence. Ignoring whatever he has in store, Jiah beats Chanyeol to the last slice of neapolitan while Jongdae helps Baekhyun look for something in their endless cabinets.

"The drawer by the coffee machine,” Kyungsoo mutters.

Someone must cover her eyes for this, Baekhyun insists. Jongin gives her a careful look waiting for her consent. She shrugs, pushing the last bit of crust past her greasy lips, and soon her eyes are engulfed in the warmth of his hands.

There’s the sound of hushing and Chanyeol’s poorly contained laugh, then a click.

“Ok, ready? Jongin, hands off. You can open them.”

She blinks away the flash of white and frowns at them before looking down.

Cake. 

Pink frosting and strawberries. It’s decorated in terrible piping work, topped with those colorful sprinkles that taste like nothing and several thin and tall candles scattered around.

There’s a message in red jelly, off-centered.

“Sorry you got shot on your–”

Whoever wrote it miscalculated the space they had available, so the word birthday has all the letters stuck together and get increasingly smaller.

Baekhyun’s satisfied grin stays put even when he ducks as a strawberry flies over him. Jongdae yelps dramatically when another hits his shoulder, his hyena laugh is interrupted by a long string of complaints.

Jongin warns her not to eat the frosting, because Baekhyun got excited with the food coloring and it tastes like medicine.

“Did you bake this?” she bites down on a strawberry. It's just a hint of sweet but perfectly juicy, it bursts in her mouth “It’s looks like a 4 year old decorated it.”

“Ok, It’s her." Baekhyun says. "Good job, team."

“Do you think I’m some kind of impostor?”

“You have a whole new name, we had to make sure.”

“Wait, so that was your birthday?” Sehun asks, shaking his head when Jondgae offers him a paper plate with a slice of cake. Only Chanyeol seems to be interested in trying it, taking his sweet time getting rid of the frosting.

The cake itself isn’t that bad. Just the usual vanilla cake mix flavor, a little dry but easy to eat.

“No, today is her birthday.” 

“Is it?” Jongin asks, scanning her face.

“Yeah. August 13th.” Baekhyun stops. “Wait, you didn’t–”

The question trails off when all she does is shove another piece of cake inside her mouth.

“I usually celebrate it in December.” 

Several weirded-out looks come her way. 

“Damn, that’s fucked up.” Sehun mumbles, and now he's getting looked at wrong. "What? I’m just saying, if I had two birthdays I’d celebrate both."

Jiah closes her eyes and blows on what's left of the candles. “That'd be hard to explain to other people, though. My friend Irene gets me flowers, but that’s about it."

Irene. Yeri. Taemin. How could she forget? They must be worried about her. Before she jumps down from the stool, once again Jongin answers a question before she gets to ask it.

"It's ok, I told Taemin we left together."

Jiah stares at him in disbelief. "No, it is not. He knows I don't leave parties with random dudes and--"

Jongdae makes a face. "Jongin's definitely not a random dude."

"He knows me too. He'll have fit, but he knows you're safe with me, trust me."

"But Yeri-"

"Fine. He dropped her off at her dorm."

"Where's my phone?" she asks Baekhyun.

"I'm afraid it didn't make it through the night, but--"

“Question,“ Chanyeol asks out of nowhere. "Why aren't you freaking out?"

"Excuse me?"

“Someone put a price on your head, and they’re being generous about it. But you're... worried that your friends won't believe you had a one night stand?”

“It's not my head they want.”

"Excuse me?"

Chanyeol’s lips part, a burst of surprised laughter escaping his mouth.

“Yeah. No, totally.” he frowns, nodding. “They put a hole through you just for funsies. They were just trying to start a tickle fight.”

“He could’ve easily taken me down in the bathroom, but he didn’t.” She gets different looks of disbelief.

Jongdae frowns. “You still got shot after that, and I’m pretty sure that wasn’t just a warning.”

“Those were expensive mercenaries, right? If they wanted me dead, I would be.”

“And this, everyone, is why they tell kids not to do drugs,” Chanyeol gives the room a look, pointing his hand at her “She wasn’t this delusional before.”

“Shut up and eat your pizza, Chanyeol” Kyungsoo says, much to her surprise.

Baekhyun agrees. “Yeah, don’t be a dick.”

Sehun sucks his lips inside his mouth, subtly eyeing everyone.

Jiah shakes her head. “That's fine, I’m not exactly worried about convincing you.” 

“They want you dead.” Chanyeol enunciates slowly, like he’s talking to a foreigner “You were lucky we were there.”

“Probably, yeah.” She’s not gonna deny that. “I appreciate what you did."

He shakes his head at her like she’s fucking stupid.

“What? You want me to suck your dick or something?”

“Alright, this is fun.” Jongdae exhales loudly, moving away to get a glass of water, slapping Sehun’s back.

Chanyeol pushes his tongue against his cheek, nodding at her. “Right. What’s dying for you anyway, right? You’ll just pop right back up in another decade.”

Jongin doesn’t let Chanyeol’s jab sink, he turns to her in genuine curiosity. “Sorry, but can you explain where you're coming from?”

“You leaked those voicemails. Your name might not be on the story, but they know it was you.” Kyungsoo turns, stirring iced tea with a glass straw “You destroyed Lee Chungjae’s reputation right after his father announced his candidacy.”  

“Im Nayeon leaked those voicemails.” she corrects him, and no one notices, but Baekhyun smiles, a spark set in his eyes. “I only did what was necessary to get them to the public. Therefore, I’m the only connection to her.”

“So what you’re saying is that you’re some– kind of medium?” 

“She’s saying Nayeon is alive,” Baekhyun says, leaning over the island and looking at her with excited eyes. “That’s what you’re saying, right?”

“Yes. How did you—?”

“A week after her death her name came up, just like yours.”

“Her name came up?”

Though Baekhyun’s smile stays intact, he visibly pales, and that’s when Jiah knows she just hit a spot.

The question has without a doubt and without her meaning to, landed somewhere. Jongdae and Chanyeol share a look. Only Sehun, Jongin, and Kyungsoo are doing a decent job of keeping their faces straight.

She just knows they’re gonna have a conversation about this later, once she’s gone.

“Why would someone put a mark on a girl who’s already dead?” They visibly relax at her answering her own question. Kyungsoo just barely squints at her. He knows better.

“Shouldn’t you know that? You’re the one claiming she somehow survived that fire” Chanyeol juts his chin at her.

If she had to put a name to the look on Baekhyun’s face, it’d be all work and no play.

“There’s something I think you’ll want to see”.

081422 - 02:58 am

“You know what’s weird?” Baekhyun mutters as she hands him a photograph.

Fresh out of the printer, the girl smiling in it is Yoo Jeongyeon. She was 23 the last time she was seen last year and attended the same university Nayeon did. The only string connecting the two is a few common friends on Facebook. 

Baekhyun tapes her picture next to the other seven photographs on the board. Like the rest of the room, the board’s made of glass, worn out and opaque by the constant use of tape on the surface, unlike the transparent, clean walls around them. 

The station is rather impressive, she had to just stand there when she first entered and stare at the computer station sprawled before her on the only brick wall at the back. 

A cluster of screens stands tall, commanded by a main, curved, and wide monitor, flanked by a couple more of them on each side. And just in case that’s not enough, an extra trio of monitors hangs above, suspended from the ceiling by sleek metallic arms that sell the illusion that they’re floating. All of them on cast a gentle light on the surrounding consoles, keyboard, touchpad, and devices she does not recognize, each meticulously organized and aligned for optimal efficiency.

Her curious eyes took it all in while Baekhyun scratched the back of his head and acted like it was just some humble setup. Honest work, he called it, still in progress. She still can’t figure out what else he can add, or how he can rearrange what’s an already pristine network of wires hidden at the back, and she’s too afraid to ask.

“None of Nayeon’s friends have posted anything about the investigation or the voicemails. That’s weird, isn’t it? If there was a possibility that your friend was murdered, you’d be outspoken about it, right? You’d want answers.”

“They could’ve been threatened” Jiah reminds him, staring up at the eight pictures on the board.

A line of girls stares back at them, all of them undergrad students, just like Nayeon. There’s a pattern in there, difficult financial situations, complicated and sometimes no familial affiliations or support network, and they’re all seriously attractive under current beauty standards.

Two of them are orphans. Two are foreign. The last one, Jeongyeon, makes an exception by keeping in touch with her mother until the time of her disappearance. Baekhyun started working on the list and gathering info with Yixing last year, and so far, every single case has turned cold. Not for a lack of investigating, she has their files, courtesy of Yixing, splayed around her.

“Still…” he mumbles, leaning his head to the side and reaching for his glass of iced coffee, looking startled when nothing but ice cubes hit his upper lip “If one of the girls at the salon were in that situation, you’d ask for the truth, threatened or not.”

Her stomach twists at the thought. She would not stop at asking for it, she’s confident that she’d turn the city upside down until she found them, but who’s doing that for these girls?

“It’s different. It’s my job.”

“Pretty sure you’ve gone past the limits of journalism.” Baekhyun tuts. “But you see it, right? There’s something here. I’m not being a conspiracy junkie.”

“I see it, yeah.”

“Have you tried talking to Nayeon’s friends?” 

“I don’t think we should be focusing on her friends like that, we might not even be focusing on these girls the way we should,” she says, rushing to explain when Baekhyun opens his mouth “Don’t get me wrong, there’s a pattern, but Nayeon was– she left a message and everything, and these girls are all…”

“Silent?” Baekhyun offers.

“Yes.” she sighs, leaning back and looking up at the ceiling. “They’re all silent, it can’t be a good sign.”

“The truth is rarely pure and never simple.” Baekhyun says, breaking her out of her trance. 

She frowns and snorts. “Did you just quote Wilde at me?”

“The Importance of Being Earnest” he smiles proudly. “Kind of out of context, but it’s true.”

She smiles at him, sighing and looking back at the board. “In my experience, most of the time the truth turns out to be boring and people end up disappointed. Everyone wants a conspiracy.”

“That’s true. But when it’s not boring–” He gives her a meaningful look, and she wonders if that’s what she looks like to other people.

“Yeah.” she agrees, he doesn’t need to finish that sentence for her to know what he means. “This doesn’t look boring at all”

“And it doesn’t look fun either, does it?” he sucks in a sharp breath. "Maybe they’re not silent, we’re just not listening the way we should.”

As it turns out, The station has no semblance of soundproofing. When someone comes in through the kitchen, they can hear the low hum of voices, the sound of keys being dropped and groans of relief as shoes are taken off at the entrance.

A few seconds later there’s a soft knock on the glass.

She doesn’t know what she expected, but it was certainly not Kim Junmyeon dressed in casual attire instead of a suit like the last time she saw him, fresh out of a syndicate debut. Now he looks more like an older brother checking on his little siblings. A dad even.

“Baekhyun, it’s 3 am. I know this is how you choose to live but she needs rest” his eyes look as tired as he sounds.

“Do you think she’s here against her will?” Baekhyun asks, offended.

He walks in, leaving the door open behind him. Jiah thinks she sees a shadow walk past through the living room, but it’s gone before she can notice anyone.

“How are you feeling?”

“Better. Thanks for the help. I appreciate it.”

He nods. “It’s what we do”

“And for the lawyer, the other day. Yixing told me” she adds. And maybe it’s the meds kicking in, or the emotional exertion of the day and having to see so many old new faces, but fatigue is beginning to weigh down on her. 

“You did well,” Junmyeon says. “The girl needed help, he had it coming.”

He buries his hands inside the pockets of his jeans, pointing at the board with his chin. There’s a signature curious pout on his face. “What’s this about?”

“Don’t be nosy. We’ll explain in the morning” Baekhyun answers, fingers dancing all over his keyboard with speedy clicks. Junmyeon doesn’t look too convinced, letting out a loud sigh that makes her feel even more foreign in this place.

Do they all live here? Together? At their age? What about Minseok?

“Alright. There’ll be a lot of that in the morning.” he gives her a look she does not reciprocate. “I’m going to bed, you two should get some rest.”

He stops just as he’s about to walk out the door.

“We don’t have a guest room ready, since someone decided to use it as a storage room, so I hope you won’t mind taking Baekhyun’s bed”

“She’s getting the coziest room in this house, she doesn’t mind” Baekhyun speaks for her, standing up and leaning over her to start shutting down his monster of a station.

She catches a glimpse of Junmyeon's reflection on the dark screen that Baekhyun turns off first. He stands there for a moment, looking at them with a pensive expression before he turns around and closes the door behind him.

Some rest might be nice, she thinks, as Baekhyun starts talking her ear off again.

7:34 AM

A few hours later she’s closing his bedroom’s door behind her as quietly as she can.

The house is silent. No one can be bothered to be up so early on a Sunday, and she counts on that being the case until she figures out where her—

“Hey there. You looking for these?”

She can’t escape him, can she? A very sleepy and messy-haired Baekhyun has a hold of her boots and her bag, closing the door across from his room behind him. She gets a glimpse of someone’s sleeping form.

“I hid them, just in case you tried to sneak out,” he explains, rubbing his puffy eyes before stretching loudly. At this pace, he’s going to wake everyone.

“I need a shower” she winces at how loud her voice sounds “And I already stayed here for too long. Can I have them back?”

“Shower?“ he pretends to think over, nodding "We have plenty of those around here, I believe. Soap, towels, shampoo. You still take them at hell temperature?”

She blinks at him.

“Baekhyun.”

“Rina.”

“I’m serious.”

“So am I! You can’t just leave on your own until we’re sure it’s safe for you out there, you’re not exactly in the condition to bite attackers either.”

“Am I a hostage?”

She doesn’t like the sweet little smile he gives her. “You’re a guest.”

“But you’re telling me I can’t leave.”

“We can negotiate after breakfast. Come on, I’m giving you a tour of my favorite spot.”

Thirty minutes later she’s waiting for him to pay for a ridiculous amount of overpriced breakfast sandwiches with different fillings. The cashier, a lanky guy with a bored expression on his face and ginormous red headphones swallowing up his ears puts everything inside a bag. 

Baekhyun sends a cheeky smile in her direction, making sure she’s still standing by the end of the counter, shifting uncomfortably in a huge pair of slippers. The lack of socks makes the experience even worse.

“That’s a lot of food,” she points out.

“We’re feeding ten adults, I promise you it’s never too much of anything in our house” he answers, starting the engine.

“Ten adults?”

“I texted Yixing. It’s been a while since we all had a meal together. I don't remember the last time we used the dining table.”

She sighs, leaning her head against the passenger window and trying to find any familiar street.

“Slept well?”

“I’m very uncomfortable with this and I don’t appreciate you withholding my things”

“Oh-kay, someone’s grumpy in the morning.” he chuckles, leaning over the steering wheel as he takes a turn. “Consider this your punishment for trying to leave without saying goodbye. You got a deadbeat father complex or something?”

She glares at him, half-heartedly. 

“Come on, it’s just breakfast with the boys. Best meal of the day, with the boys.”

“It’s not just breakfast, you know that” she mutters, closing her eyes to rest them for a second. 

“Hey, it’s just us,” He surprises her by finding her wrist resting on the seat. His fingers curl around it, giving it a light tug, like a kid trying to get a grown-up’s attention “No one will jump you or anything. I know things are awkward, but they won’t have to be once we all talk and catch up, yeah?”

The red light goes green after what feels like an eternity. It takes him a second to notice, and he’s back to quietly driving them across the street, still not letting go of her wrist. 

“You trust me, right?” he asks suddenly, giving her a glance.

“Seriously, out of nowhere?”

He doesn’t laugh, only turns to look at her with a serious look on his usually relaxed features. “Cause I trust you, Rin. I hope you know that.”

The fuck? 

“Ok? Thanks–” 

“I mean, I don’t know what you’ve been up to, obviously, or what– you know? Happened, but I know I trust you.” he nods firmly, fixing his throat and suddenly avoiding her eyes. "Whatever happened, it doesn't matter to me. I'm just happy to see you again."

She feels the sudden need to get out of the car, but her shoulder would probably combust, so she gives him the softest of nods. The feeling that it's a mediocre reply lingers.

Eventually, he lets go of her wrist.

About half an hour later, she's watching Jongdae fix a generous batch of coffee while singing his heart out to an OST only someone over 30 could recognize. He was the first to wake up, walked into the kitchen, took a look at her and immediately scolded Baekhyun for not getting her slippers closer to her size. 

They belong to Chanyeol and he thinks it’s just hilarious that she walks like a duck in them.

They all come down one by one in different states of sleepiness. All Jiah can think is that life has taken a seriously strange turn, and there’s not much she can do about it other than hold on to a cup of coffee and watch in silence, hair still wet.

“How are you feeling?” Junmyeon asks once again, taking some multivitamins and eyeing a plate of fruit that Sehun tries to keep safe from Chanyeol’s prying hands, asking him for the third time if he washed his hands.

He looks like Jongdae had to drag him out of bed, bed sheet imprints leaving red lines on his left cheek, swollen eyes and messy hair. There’s even dry drool on his chin. She wants to point it out, but they're not comfortable like that with each other.

He eyes the third spoonful of sugar she drops on her coffee but keeps any comment to himself.

“We can ask Dr. Jangmi for something stronger if you need it, just let me know.”

“Alright, thanks. I appreciate that,” she says for what feels like the 20th time in the past 24 hours.

Thanks. I appreciate that. This is weird as fuck though, can we not do this?

“Huh? What's this? What’s going on here?”

There is a soft giggle at the end of Yixing’s question. He's taking his shoes off, stumbling a bit, not closing the door behind him, holding a coffee cup carrier.

“Breakfast.” Jondgae says, and Jiah suspects he made a face. Whatever that means.

“Hey,” he makes his around the island and engulfs her in a careful hug. He's warm to the touch from being outside. “How are you feeling?”

"I’m ok.” she smiles, not being able to help her lips from pouting. “My shoulder’s kind of fucked, though.”

He frowns, shakes his head slowly, hands moving up and down her good arm, leaning down to press his lips to her temple. "I know. I'm sorry. But the more rest you get, the faster you'll feel better again, so don't rush yourself."

She nods, letting her weight rest on him for just a bit, eyes fluttering open when white cotton and a head of thick black hair passes by, startling her.

Kim Minseok is putting two extra carriers next to the one Yixing left on the island top. The door is now closed, but she never heard him come in. And now he's handing people coffee.

Chanyeol thanks him a thousand times. It seems like Jongdae's coffee making skills are controversial, he nags at them about being ungrateful, but walks over to get his cup anyway.

"Oh, that's–"

Jongdae's extended hand stops abruptly at Yixing's interruption. The cup Minseok was just about to give him is now being held by both of them.

"Dirty chai. That's Rina's." he explains.

Jiah, unsure about how to proceed, stares at the cup in front of her face, neither releasing it. Jongdae drops his hand, eyes shifting between them.

Yixing blinks curiously at Minseok, whose face she's avoiding to turn to look at.

Sehun leans over and grabs a cup of his own with his ridiculously long arms.

"Are you guys gonna give it to her, or–"

HIs comment wraps it up. Yixing gives her the cup, smiling down at her and paying no mind to the tilt of Jongdae’s eyebrow or Junmyeon's side eye.

“Oh, before I forget. I told Haneul you're taking a break. He sounded worried, maybe you should give him a call?” 

Right. Haneul. She’s been so distracted that she forgot about him as well. Yixing offers her his phone, but Baekhyun cuts him off and tells her to focus on breakfast while it's still warm.

Kyungsoo is the last one to take a seat at the table, lazily scrolling through his phone. There’s a pair of thick-framed glasses perched on top of his nose. He sighs at Baekhyun’s loud moan when he takes the first bite.

“Just as good as I remembered.”

The table is filled with the sound of eating and the low hum of someone's lofi playlist playing from the speakers. The moment lingers just long enough to become awkward.

“I don’t know about you guys, but I love uncomfortable silences during breakfast, I heard they’re good for digestion,”

Junmyeon stops mid-bite and gives Sehun a look.

“What? I mean she’s here now, can’t you just catch up? Ask her what happened on the third day?”

“Ok, Sehun. Just finish your sandwich.” 

He rolls his eyes, pointedly taking a big bite.

“Didn’t you have something to show us?” Jongin asks helpfully. Jiah has noticed that him and Sehun stick to each other, despite being on opposite ends of several traits.

“Glad you asked,” Baekhyun claps his hands, standing up as he licks his fingers having successfully devoured his sandwich. He disappears for a bit and comes back wheeling the glass board behind him.

Yixing turns to the side in his seat, pointing at one of the pictures. 

“There’s another girl?”

“Yep,” Baekhyun beams, the excited smile on his face melting immediately. He fixes his throat. “Long story short, these girls all are missing, they’re also all students, and they could be connected to Nayeon’s disappearance. We’re thinking they might help us find her.”

“Did you just say find her?”

“I did,” Baekhyun points his finger at Junmyeon, happy that he caught that “Nayeon is alive.”

Other than Sehun noisily blowing on his drink, the silence is heavy with skepticism. 

“We’re keeping a positive mindset here. There is a big, big chance she didn’t die in that fire. The body they found at her apartment was declared burned beyond recognition, and Nayeon didn’t have recent dental work done on her, so they couldn't even look for a match. And before you accuse me of being delusional, Rina came to the same conclusion all on her own.”

“Is this true?”

Jiah nods at Junmyeon. “She sent her brother the recordings through a shipping company days before the fire and scheduled the delivery. He got the package in the mail exactly two weeks after the fire.”

“So she knew she was in danger.”

“Creative.” Chanyeol mutters, impressed “She found a way to let her brother know without putting him in direct danger.”

“And then he tried to end Lee Chungjae himself.” Sehun adds.

“If she went through that effort, she would’ve tried to hide, right? It was only a theory, but Lee Chungjae probably has a reason to believe this as well, and he doesn’t want any loose ends.”

Junmyeon’s face is unreadable. 

“And well,” she points at her shoulder. “I think that night proved my theory.”

Yixing leans back on his chair, crossing his arms. It’s followed by a dry chuckle at the other side of the table.

“Can we just tell her?”

"Baekhyun tries to interrupt, but Chanyeol has a point to make.

"Nah, let her know, or she’ll go out there and successfully get herself killed this time just because she thinks she has backup.”

Jongdae tries as well, not without giving her a careful sideways glance that she doesn’t return, staring back at Chanyeol with just a slight narrowing of her eyes. Her lack of reaction so far has made his demeanor get a little more vicious.

“Let’s not–”

“How do you think they knew it was you, even with your editor protecting you?” Chanyeol finally asks “Your protector snitched on you, didn’t think twice before selling you out to Lee Chungjae’s team. He’s putting good money on his dad's campaign, did you not know?”

“Protector?” she blurts out, neither a question nor an affirmation. “Are you- wait, you mean Namjoon?” 

She snorts.

“I mean, yes? He knew about the investigation. I let him know before it came out.”

“You’re full so of shit. It's just sad.” Chanyeol shakes his head slowly.

“Like I said before, I’m not worried about convincing you.”

“Why?” he dares.

She can't judge him for being so remarkably slow. He doesn’t trust her, he’s probably terrified of whatever he thinks she represents. Yixing didn't lie about people being wary of her.

It’s disappointing to see him handle what he thinks is a threat so poorly, but then again he always was a heart-on-his-sleeve kind of guy. 

Others keep their silence and listen. Kyungsoo, even Junmyeon. Minseok's glare is impossible to ignore.

“Because sometimes being underestimated can work in your favor.” she speaks slowly like it’s a child across from her and not a man two years her senior.

The tension spikes. All these resources, a wide range of skills, a seat at the syndicate, and just a few harmless words make their mood drop.

Junmyeon leans in. “So what I'm hearing is that you put yourself at risk just to... prove a theory.”

“Of course not,” she wonders if he paid attention at all to what she said. “I hoped they’d come expecting to find Nayeon through me, so I set up a lead. It’s not about if they take it but who does. Chungjae's not doing this alone.”

“And did it work? The bait?“ Jongin sounds hopeful.

"I’m hoping it did.”

“You’re hoping it did?” Junmyeon repeats. “It’s been 48 hours, what if they realized you’re bluffing and decided you’re not useful anymore?”

“I’ve got it handled.”

“You never mentioned any of this” Baekhyun says, breaking his silence.

He has a look of disappointment on his face she wants to get rid of, and then she remembers that pale grin he gave her yesterday, like he was about to break into a cold sweat.

“I’ll let you know what I find.” 

There's something happening right in front of her eyes. As much as she wishes she could trust Yixing, his explanation about them being wary about her association with Namjoon doesn't cut it.

Her eyes find Minseok's and she hopes he's better than Baekhyun at subtlety. If getting himself a seat at the table is any indication, chances are he is.

Something indeed, and she's nearly convinced that it goes against the deal he signed a few days ago.

But that's not it, isn't it? There's more to it.

He lifts his chin, just barely, it feels too much like a silent warning. It has the opposite effect he wants. The dirty chai kicks in at once.

“Frankly, I don’t think you’re in the state to be handling anything right now.” Junmyeon’s amused little chuckle kills her momentum.

“I agree,” Yixing says, much to her disappointment “Even if you’re right, it doesn’t mean you're in any less danger.”

“I know how to take care of myself."

“Do I need to remind you that just almost bled out on the way to the hospital? This is obviously getting out of your hands. I won’t have your picture next to those girls'.”

Junmyeon points at the board. He's wearing a ring on his index finger. She's surprised it fits. Maybe he had it resized.

“You can leave it to us this time, we’ll handle it.”

“I appreciate the concern, but it's not your decision to make.”

"Question," Baekhyun says, a surprisingly serious look on his face. "Would it be so bad to let us help?"

“That's not the point. I promised Im Haneul I’d see this through.”

“Wouldn't be the first time you let someone down. He'll survive.” Chanyeol coldly replies.

Her blood starts to boil. They're cornering her, and her patience has a limit.

“Alright, I don’t know what your problem is, but let’s get it over with."

A deep voice has heads turning to the right. “You know what his problem is. Don’t play dumb, it doesn’t suit you.” 

If Chanyeol’s voice was venomous, Kyungsoo’s tone feels like battery acid.

Chanyeol wastes no time. “Only a handful of people survived Hwacheon's fire, how did you make it out?”

“You shouldn’t believe official records, the prison system in this country is a joke.”

“So no complex escape plan? I was expecting some prison break shit from you.”

“Sorry to disappoint.”

He shakes a finger at her.

“I heard rumors, you know? About this girl that worked for Kim Namjoon. No one knew where she came from, not even back in their hometown. They said she was a witch, could sniff out a traitor from a mile away,”

Jiah has to give it to him, he sure knows how to set the mood with the storytelling.

“And then one day, she disappeared without a trace. People said he killed her after she tried to turn on them, others said someone in their circle knocked her up and he sent her away. Whatever happened, she vanished.”

“A hundred years passed and my brother and I discovered the new Avatar, an airbender named Aang." Sehun says, arm coming to rest around Jongin's shoulders. He pretends not to hear him.

“I don't know what you want me to say."

“Was it him, Hwacheon’s fire? Is that how you got out?”

To her utter disbelief, he's being serious. All she can do is open her mouth and close it, look around to see if anyone else understands how stupid that is.

Kyungsoo shrugs. “You’re not denying it.” 

“No, Kyungsoo. Kim Namjoon didn’t blow up a federal facility to help me escape. I can’t believe I have to explain this to you. I didn’t even know them back then.”

“Hwacheon is just ten miles away from Songju, isn't it? Right where Namjoon’s operation started. That was you. November 10th, the prosecutor's kids, the clean up, the start of the syndicate. You were there.”

"I was." she says without hesitation, still not understanding what's the big deal.

"Why?"

"Because they helped me out. And I because wanted to."

“Well, since we all know he cashes in all his favors, I guess the big, scary question here is what did you have to do to pay off your debt after they helped you out? Was it witchery, or was it-” 

“Ok,” Junmyeon interferes, putting one hand on the table. “You’re crossing the line.”

“Don’t worry, he’s not even close.” she says with a light tone, but the slight curl of her lips betrays the cutting edge behind her words.

"I just hope that if you got knocked up, you had the sense to get rid of it. Otherwise, you're an asshole for putting yourself in danger when you have a kid somewhere."

“Wow. When did he become this fucking pathetic?” she asks, genuinely curious, but they're all either too uncomfortable or embarrassed to grace her with an answer.

“Ok, I’ll translate for him.” Sehun chimes in, leaning forward with a serious expression on his face. Jongin closes his eyes and expects the worst. “What he's trying to ask is, did you engage in premarital sex with Kim Namjoon and/or any of his associates?”

Yixing drops his head. Jongin looks kind of mortified but kind of amused at Chanyeol's immediate response, shaking his head and rolling his eyes.

“That is not what I’m asking.”

“No? So you’re worried about my hypothetical kid now?”

“Ok. Chanyeol, drop it. Let’s get back on track.”

But she likes this track. She doesn't see the point in dropping it yet.

"If you’re taking the misogynistic route, at least do it right. Don’t be a half-assed piece of shit, it’s pitiful.”

“Rina.”

“I’m not finished, Suho.”

A quick oop follows.

"I get it. I know what this is about. I see you. You're still dealing with your abandonment issues, but that’s not on me."

Chanyeol's face drops.

She carries on, no remorse. "What? You think you're special because your daddy wasn't around to play ball? Give me a break."

“Jesus. Ice fucking cold.”

A sharp grating sound. He forcefully shoves his chair back.

“Hey, hey–”

“Park Chanyeol.”

Chanyeol stands up at full height and others follow. Jongdae tries to talk some sense into him. Yixing doesn’t hesitate to do the same when she mirrors Chanyeol's stance, arm extended in front of her, shaking his head.

Sehun seems to be out of little quips. Like him, Minseok remains seated, looking at the scene from the end of the table.

Poor Jongdae, he's still trying. “Sit down, man. C'mon.”

But Chanyeol's not listening, his jaw is locked in, teeth gritted together. Finger pointed at her, spit spraying in the air.

”You let us all think you were dead.“ 

"I had my reasons.” 

She’s trying her best to not lose it against his stupid loud voice that takes up the room. Her head, her shoulder, her back, they all hurt. She should’ve left the moment she woke up, barefoot.

Chanyeol throws his arms in the air, growling.

“Your reasons? To let everyone mourn you for what? A decade. What the fuck is that about? Who does that?”

“I'm sorry, what’s the acceptable protocol for you? Enlighten me.”

“Dude, you’re seriously not asking that.” he winces, like he'd rather not look at her. “Kim Namjoon, seriously? That was your only option? You. Everything you tried to preach to us. Looking down at us, talking about better ways and shit, like you were some kind of paragon of virtue."

“Ah, fuck off. Seriously, fuck off." she repeats with closed eyes, an exhausted mantra. "Don’t selectively bring shit from the past into this."

"Was that just to make yourself feel a little less bad about, huh? About getting Yuan killed because you couldn’t keep your mouth shut?”

It feels like the air was sucked out of the room. No one was ready for that, perhaps not even Chanyeol. For a fleeting second he looks like he caught himself off guard.

Jiah lets out a shaky, hoarse little laugh, mumbling to herself. "You don't know shit. Not even now."

"You know you can repeat that all you want but that's still the truth."

“You wanna talk about the truth? The only reason I was there that night was to warn you, but you treated me like I was out of my mind. Everything I tried to tell you would happen, happened. That's the truth,"

Silence, she's not done yet.

"And then you got in that stupid car and sped down the fucking street,"

Not even near.

"You didn’t look back. You had the chance to leave it all behind and move on with your life while mine wasted in jail. But now you wanna act like I owe you an explanation?”

There's no way they remember that night as vividly as she does. Every tiny detail, the smell of shitty sewage water against her face, the weight of some asshole’s knee on her back pinning her to the street, the overlapping of people yelling in panic. Red and blue lights blinding her. Blasting sirens.

“I don't blame you. I fucked up time and time again and it’s not like you could’ve done anything to get me out of it.” she admits. 

“That’s right. You fucked up and we fucked up. So you decided that was it? You couldn't reach out for help or at least contact us? Did you not think of the consequences of letting people believe you were dead?”

She can’t help the bitter smile, half of her wanting to ask Chanyeol what he knows about consequences, but he’d mistake that for her wanting to hear an answer. Ten years later it’s not something that interests her.

"Pretty much, yeah,” she replies shamelessly, after a moment of consideration.

“That easy, huh?”

“Honestly, I was miserable back then. I was a kid, I only had you, I thought I could fix it, but everything kept getting worse.” she says, and the dam has not cracked yet, but it might. Any second now. “So yeah, after the fire, when I realized I had the choice to start over, I took it. That part? That was easy, yes.”

Chanyeol blinks at her, like he's not sure he's looking at someone.

“I was very careful. Don't think this situation here happened because of me being sloppy. I never planned to see any of you again, and I was at peace with that.” 

She wants to carry on but her throat feels raw, and Chanyeol’s breathing through his mouth. A couple of fat, anime-like tears spill down his cheek.

The dust has settled and it's clear that the room has shifted. Yixing was just sitting right next and now there’s some distance between them, like she’s exuding toxic fumes. Baekhyun looks like a kid with glassy eyes and a red nose. It’s too late to take back, it’s all out of her chest, too heavy to cage it back up.

“I do have a question though, why are you wearing my rings?”

Kyungsoo stands up, walking past her and stopping just to throw something on the table. The metallic rattle is enough to let her know what it is.

“They meant something,” he replies, chillingly calm. “Back when we thought you were dead.”

“But now that I think about it, I don’t think you made it out of the fire.”