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#jojo viento aure
danddymaro · 4 years
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Before I Go | Jean Pierre Polnareff x Reader
Set during Part 5. AU Where sweet Baby Polnareff doesn’t get fucked and instead gets a happy ending, surviving Diavolo.  
Kind of, sorta angsty (???)
Thoughts are italics in quotations = ‘Example’
Flashbacks are in italics = Example
Word count:  2395
Before I Go
“ How was I supposed to tell him?” She said quietly as a soft, little look of remembrance touched with sadness melted onto her features as she remembered each and every time the question went over her head,
‘How Polnareff? How could I have even stood before you ?’ She asked herself, not knowing how she could ever come to face him again.
By then, the stark night was illuminated by the large glowing moon, the only light that could lovingly touch her now, something she detested with a passion, because it just reminded her of how seldom her life would remain while stuck lurking in the darkness.
Furthermore, it reminded her of  her loss of humanity,
“ How was I supposed to admit that the entire time we’d been together, I had been nothing but a monster,” She revealed, her (e/c) eyes glaring down at her open palm, her overgrown nails, both pointed and black coming into perfect view as she brought her fingers down, forming a tight, shaking fist.
“Every time he’d look at me, he'd know I was just as revolting as those two…” She said while sucking in a harsh breath, “ Those...two…” She added through her tightened teeth, unable to finish her sentence, woeful tears leaking from her (e/c) eyes as she recalled the events which took place many years ago.
Suddenly calming, she then let loose of her tightened fist, her shoulders coming down in a slacking state during the process,
“It's been years and I haven't heard a word from him,” she started, continuing to speak to the golden haired teen to reveal all of her truths, “ But to be fair, I hadn’t really searched much,” she admitted, “Because...well... I was too afraid he’d know I was still around. ”
It was then that she cracked a small smile, a very minuscule one that showed tenderness,
“ He'd no doubt found a wife,” She doted, certainty in her (e/c) drops. “... someone to share little moments with, just as he'd always dreamed of. - All like he said he would one day.” She said with a touch of amusement, remembering how everyone would roll their eyes at his flirtatious nature,
‘ He was such a romantic...’
“ And of course....I can imagine him with so many children,” she said smiling, her voice cracking in between the sentence, because she’d always wanted to have children as well.
“ I can see him playing with them, both arms outstretched as he spins them around,” she added with a hiccup, shaking it off with an unsteady chuckle instead to try and drive away the unbearable pain in her chest,
‘ Just like with sherry...like you said you'd done so many times…’ She recalled with fondness.
“ I miss those days, those few days we knew each other, because while they hadn’t been the longest, I can admit without a shadow of a doubt that I'd never been happier than I was at that point in my life!” She confessed, her arms tightly hugging her own figure.
‘Every day we struggled to make it to the next, and even then I’d never smiled so much. I’d never been so damn happy than when I with all of them... Especially you Polnareff,’  She thought while thinking back to all of the men she’d traveled with. 
She missed jabbing Jotaro until he grew annoyed, physically poking him out of boredom until he fought her back, doing just the same out of rebuttal. Occasionally, she’d catch his scowl take a turn, twitching into a smile during his own attack.
“Good Grief,” He’d mutter, “You’re so annoying!” He huffed in between his assault.
She missed hearing Kakyoin jabber on about his gaming strategies, promising they’d one day play together. There was a smugness to him during his talks that she found funny, because he was sure no one could really beat his technique, no matter what video game they’d pick. 
“You know,” Noriyaki started, “I’ve never really played against anyone else,” He admitted, “Not with a friend,” He added, smiling at her with appreciation for even bothering to take interest in something he had a passion for.
She missed Avdol’s calm, warm air, and the ease she had when she was around him. Out of all of them, he felt the closest to family, being the wise one, the level headed one she could ask for advise and trust with her life, 
‘I never had a doubt you’d give yours for one of ours,’ She thought as she remembered him with fondness, appreciating his sacrifice, the very one that kept her from falling into Vanilla Ice’s mercy. 
The same one that kept Polnareff out of danger more than once...
She missed Mr. Joestar’s pleasant company, always beaming as he’d lay a hand over her head as a little act of affection he’d grown accustomed to doing. She also enjoyed his stories, listening on attentively to them with amazement, 
“You know...” Joseph said while looking down at his prosthetic, feeling just a smidge bashful at his admittance, “ Sometimes I feel like no one listens to this old fool,” He confessed to her. “For a long time now, even Holly seemed to grow tired of me, focusing more on her own life,” He said while offering (f/n) a soft smile, “ Thank you for listening (f/n). Thank you for taking the time,” He added, laying his hand over  her head, scuffling up her combed (h/c) strands while she responded with a happy smile, truly at peace.
‘I even miss that gas machine Iggy,’ She mused, loving the tenderness he showed when they were left alone,
“Why can’t you be this sweet all the time,” she asked the creature while pouting, touching the little sensitive spot behind his ear, “It wouldn’t hurt to stop acting so tough,” She suggested, watching as the Frenchie scoffed, nonetheless staying still to keep being caressed.
And then there was Polnareff, the man who she simply could not let go of, no matter how much time progressed. 
- The same man who currently hid from her, the entire time sitting in disbelief as he heard her voice.
Listening on, the silver-haired male closed his eyes tightly, keeping himself hidden away from her, listening on to the woman as she poured her heart out to Giorno.
‘I hadn’t forgotten you either.’ He thought to himself, having spent nights with the same heartache, yearning for the woman he thought had died back in Cairo at the hands of the golden-haired fiend.
“ Is that why you helped us?” Giorno asked, his voice soft as he stared at the woman with interest, finally having understood her strange behavior. "Just to find him again," He added with a soft smile lifting up his features, truly taken by the dedication that existed within her.
With a somber nod, she confirmed it.
“It’s also why you only showed yourself during the night,” He added with understanding.
“Precisely,” She said with a soft blow of air coming out from her nostrils, “I did all I could to aid you,” She said lowly, " Just know, I’m sorry I couldn’t do more,” She added with regret, knowing there were none but three of them left.
"Yeah," he responded back with the same gentleness.
In the end, he couldn't blame her for what happened, especially not now that he understood her restrictions.
“ I  just wanted to see him one last time,” she admitted, “ One last time before…” stopping herself, she swallowed thickly, instead, trailing her eyes up to the full moon where in the morning the sun would soon arise,
“ Before?” Giorno asked her, urging her to continue.
Looking at him straight on, the woman smiled wholeheartedly, her eyes shut tight as  a large grin itched over her face, painfully being forced to stay,
" Before I let the sun rise over me. Before I turn to nothing but ash," She revealed to him.
" I wanted to see him one more time before I go.
 I haven't found happiness in all this time, and I doubt I'll ever come to hold it within my chest again." She added.
“ I don't mind him looking away from me, not when even I can’t stand the sight of my own figure.” She spoke with the same melancholy,  “ At this point, I don't care if he detests me, because I've lived with that thought every day for years.
I know he’d despise me.
The only comfort I have from that is that I know that once he finds out what I've become, he'd be much happier knowing I was dead. And then...then I could make him happy just once before I die. "
The teen’s Green eyes open wide as he heard her, his  mouth opened up to speak before another voice cut him off,
“Tch! Are you insane?” Polnareff said out loud, barking at her as he revealed himself to her, his arms straining to push his chair forward.
“P-pol…” she couldn't finish, her eyes grazing over the filthy murky silver of his chair, and then his artificial limbs that were now useless.
Stopping, she held in a breath, her heart stilled at his miserable sight,
"I don't care about any of that !" He cried out to her, having willed himself right to her, his two hands tightly grasping hers to pull her down.
"Pol-" she couldn't finish her surprised outburst before she fell down to him, his lips immediately latching onto  hers.
Through his shut eyes, crystal droplets escaped, mixing with her two falling streams as they traveled down, their paths once again coming together to taste bittersweet,
“I could care less...” He murmured between their mashed lips,  “Mon amour,” he muttered softly, drawing back slightly to gaze into her (e/c) colored eyes,  the pad of his thumb brushing over the flesh of her lips, both top and bottom, relishing in the softness of them, something he hadn’t been able to do in the past, despite all the overwhelming desire he'd had during those days.
“Do you know what my life has been without you?” he asked her, moving his hand to take a hold of the side of her face, collecting her tears and gently  wiping them away,
“Do you know how many pieces my heart shattered into?” he added, a shuttered breath leaving him as he thought back to the last night he'd seen her,
He moved too slow, his royal blue eyes watching with horror as her body curled onto the large arm impaling her, clean going through her.
Frozen, he watched while she was then  thrown aside, her beaten body rolling across the concrete ground. A trail of red was painted upon the empty road, starting from the woman’s carcass, and leading back to DIO.
"(f/n)! " He cried out, crawling towards her, his vision blurred as he stared at her longer.
Pushing himself he cried out in lament as he stopped, his sluggish body unable to move further,
"I couldn't help Jotaro," He mumbled, his cheek pressed against the chipped , concrete ground,
"I couldn't save Avdol.
I couldn't  save Iggy.
I wasn't there for Kakyoin.
I couldn't even reach out to Mr. Joestar .
And now....Now... (f/n)… I can't even make my way towards you,"  
He said while tightly shutting his eyes, the smothering embrace of slumber taking over, his last thoughts on the woman  slain a few feet before him.
Silently signaling both Trish and Mista, Giorno took his leave, deciding it best to leave the other two to themselves, sparing one last glance at them with a placid smile, wishing them the best. 
"- I searched for you," Polnareff  told (f/n), "The first thing I did was look for you when I woke up in the hospital," he revealed to her. " But by then you were gone. Jotaro said that you were gone when he went back, and we didn't know what to think of it." He went on,
"Last I knew you'd been struck by him... You'd been beaten bloody...
After that, I would have never imagined you alive," he said with relief.
"But here you are," he marveled at her, seeing how little she'd changed, retaining all of the beauty she possessed in the past, and in fact,  growing even more stunning now.
"I am, "she said back to him, " I am here...but I'm a monster nonetheless," She told him. "He'd given me his blood and whether or not I knew of it, it doesn't change the fact that I -"
"That I love you." he interrupted her, " It doesn't change the fact that I love you.” He flat out told her, “ It doesn’t change that I'd thought of you every day since then. That no matter how much time passed by, I could never find it in myself to even look at another woman." He went on,
"(f/n) ," he started, his face soft and uncertain, a gentle, rosy color rising over his face as he continued to look up at her, reminding her of the past version of himself that was still young,
"You're nothing like him.” he assured her, “ You're no monster, because all in all, you're still (f/n). You're still my dream, " He admitted.
Grasping both her hands, he took them up to his lips, kissing them sweetly, his blue eye gazing up at her with unwavering love,
"I've spent years without you, having been unable to tell you in the past how much I loved you.
I know I'm only a fraction of the man I was before, and so much time has gone by. 
But...
But (f/n), I'd still love to spend the rest of my days with you. Grow old at your side. " He told her.
Her hand rose to take hold of his cheek, caressing it tenderly before drawing in towards him, answering him with a sweet kiss in return,
'I can't grow old.
I can never live a normal life...but even so, even while knowing,
you still propose such a thing to me,' She mused.
"If you still love me the way I am... If you'll still want to spend the rest of your life with me, then I want nothing more than to live in that future,
With you Polnareff,"  She said with happiness.
The warmth of his body radiated to hers, and for a fraction of a second she felt the same as she did before, 
Alive and human… 
Happy and accepted...
“I love you,” He said while not taking his eye off of her, never wanting to go another day without his love.
“Forever... and always,” He said with evident adoration.
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