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theetherealbloom · 8 months ago

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BUT DADDY I LOVE HIM - CH.4

Chapter 4: Scandal Does Funny Things To Pride, But Brings Lovers Closer

Summary: After harboring a crush on your dad's charming best friend, Joel Miller, you graduate college only to be confused by something he supposedly said to you, but then he and his daughter Sarah, reluctantly move away due to his work. Six months later, Joel returns to town, and you're desperate to confirm if his words were real. Both you and your dad eagerly await his arrival but for entirely different reasons. As feelings intensify, you realize that falling for him might not be temporary after all.

Paring: Dbf!Joel Miller x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Angst, AGE-GAP Romance, Reader is Early twenties and Joel is in his late 30s to early 40s, Secret Romance, Sneaking Around, FLUFF, LOTS OF SMUT, SMUT, SMUT, Heavy Make Out Session, Oral Male Receiving, Penetration Kissing, Barely any plot, NOT A SLOW BURN AT ALL, Relationship, Swearing, Depression, Anxiety, Crying, Suggestive content, Flirting, Flattery, Awkward, Virgin reader, inexperienced reader, slightly Self Deprecating, Suggestive Content, Size Kink, Reader is “smaller” than Joel but no further descriptions, Breeding Kink, PWP (wrap it up), Body worship, declaring their love for each other,

Word Count: 5.8k

A/N: I wrote this in two days and I’m lowkey unsure if this all makes sense LMAO. So here we are, at the final chapter… tf am I gonna do now… (*stares at all the unfinished series rewrites*) well… damn. See you at the epilogue.

Side note: I’m dyslexic and English isn’t my first language! So I apologize in advance for the spelling and/or grammatical errors. As always, reblogs, comments, and likes are always appreciated. Thank you and happy reading!

Song: But Daddy I Love Him by Taylor Swift

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Joel doesn't think you both slept a wink that first week, the two of you creeping around in the dead of night and again in the pre-dawn light. You were over at Joel's place every morning, right after your dad left for work. He still thinks you're in your own bed every night, only helping Joel out part-time during the day.

But in between when he leaves for work and when he gets home for dinner, you're right where you belong – by Joel's side. Or, in most cases, bouncing your fine ass on the end of his thick, throbbing cock until you're screaming his name into a pillow.

It's not as if you haven't tried to tell your dad the truth. Joel has, too. But it cuts him up to keep anything from his oldest friend, especially when he sees your dad on such a high. Telling him the reality of the situation would surely ruin him.

Even though Joel knows it's the right thing to do, the thought of shattering your father's newfound joy and confidence is almost too much to bear. He's seen the way your dad's face lights up when he talks about the success of his business, all thanks to Joel's intervention.

Your dad is even making noise about setting up a workshop on the East Coast, making Joel's original idea sound like his own. But if it makes him happy, Joel's happy. Because of all that, you and Joel made a pact – if your dad asks either of you directly if you're anything more than just friends, you'll tell him the truth. But he's been so busy that neither of you have actually seen much of him at all.

As uneasy as it makes Joel, keeping the both of you a secret just a little longer seems like the easiest way to avoid making waves. Or so Joel thought. It's been two weeks to the day, and Joel doesn't think you or him have ever been happier your whole lives, except for the sneaking around past your dad bit.

But your dad is no dummy. And Joel can see now that he should have just come out with it, long before helping him get his business into first gear. You both guess that you two got lazy.

It happens right after another one of your father's dinners on a Friday night. He's insisted Joel, Tommy, and Sarah come over, and he'll cook for all of you. But come eleven o'clock, when Tommy and Sarah go home, and then midnight, you and Joel are giving each other guarded glances. And your dad takes on the air of a man who has something to say.

"I should probably head to bed," you say, about to excuse yourself, but your dad asks you to sit.

"You don't have to pretend anymore, honey," your dad says calmly, shaking his head and laughing to himself. But it's not a happy laugh – it's a wounded, ironic kind of grimace he wears as his eyes settle on Joel's.

"And you, Joel? I suppose you're beat after spending the day with my daughter 'helping you out' around the house, huh?" your dad says cuttingly, but he regains his composure quickly.

"I guess I have somethin' to tell you," Joel croaks, trying to swallow but feeling his mouth dry as dirt.

"I guess we both have something to tell you," you add, making Joel jump when your hand slips into his, and you rest them both on the table.

Your dad takes in a sharp breath, steadying himself, and Joel has to say, he's being a fucking man about it. "So go ahead," he murmurs.

"Tell me all about it," he says before raising his hand quickly. "No. Don't tell me all about it. I don't need to know the sordid details... Just tell me when all this started, Joel. You too, hon'," he asks, looking over to you, his eyes filling up with tears before either of you even says a word.

"How could you?" he sniffs bitterly, looking every bit as hurt and betrayed as Joel thought he might, but he's not angry. Not angry at all. Just hurt that you two have been fooling around behind his back and keeping secrets.

You feel upset too and lower your head in shame, but Joel, for one, feels better now that he knows. The burden of the lie has been removed, and he's ready to face the consequences, whatever they may be.

Joel takes a deep breath, his hand tightening around yours. "I've been in love with her since the day she graduated," he tells your father, his voice steady and unwavering.

"Things moved quicker than I thought, and it wasn't until we both knew how much we were in love that it meant hurting you if you knew," Joel explains, not making excuses, but trying to help your dad understand.

Your father is silent for a moment, his brow furrowed in thought. "So. You coming all the way out here, for good. All that was just a way to get to her?" he asks, his tone laced with a hint of accusation.

"Don't twist it to make it look like that," Joel retorts, but your dad isn't entirely wrong.

"I meant what I said about helping you, and I still do," Joel reminds him, his voice firm.

"I can give her more than any man half my age, too. Give her a life..." Joel trails off, his words hanging in the air.

The tension in the room is palpable as your dad's anger flares, his words sharp and cutting. "What? Give her a life her father couldn't? She's my fucking daughter, Joel. Who the fuck asked you to help yourself, huh?" he demands, his frustration evident. But you interject, your own voice rising in defense.

"I'm not a kid anymore, Dad. I'm an adult. And I know you've provided for me, always made sure I have everything I need," you assert, your tone firm and unwavering.

"But do you think a woman like me is ever gonna have a guy like Joel just breeze into town, sweep me off my feet, and then let him go?" you challenge defiantly. "Getting eight bucks an hour tutoring part-time and living with my Dad into my old age isn’t the kind of life I had planned for myself."

Joel admires your fire, proud of you for speaking your mind. The air crackles with tension, but at least everyone is having their fair say. Despite the burning bridge, the honesty in the room feels like a weight lifted off your shoulders.

For your dad to take the news without his fists flying, Joel realizes he's matured more gracefully than he would have given him credit for. The pulse of the moment slows, the truth out in the open. No more hiding, but decisions loom ahead that may not be easy.

Your father reflects, a nostalgic air settling around him. "I knew that day of your graduation, sweetheart. And I know you better than you think, Joel," he says, his gaze shifting between the two of you. "I just didn't want to believe it."

"I love her," Joel declares, his voice unwavering. "I'm having his baby, Dad," you begin, the revelation causing a moment of shock between both your dad and Joel, before your laughter breaks the tension.

“You should have seen your faces.” You chuckle a little.

"Honestly, I want to have his kids, Dad. I want us to be together forever. I want to take care of Sarah. House, kids... the whole nine yards," you chime in, relief evident in your voice.

Your father's response is unexpected, a mix of emotions playing across his face. "I know you do, sweetie," he comforts you, a smile creasing his face. "You wanna be the mom you never had. And I guess I just didn't wanna lose the little girl I raised all on my own."

As your father prepares to leave, the moment's weight settles over you all. "I just need time, Joel," he finally says. "Time to get used to all this... Time to get used to not having her around."

The nuclear fallout you both expected never came, not in the way you expected. The night ends with a sense of understanding and acceptance, your father's blessing a silent promise of support and love.

Walking home next door, the weight of the evening hangs heavy in the air. In the quiet of your shared bed, you find solace in Joel's arms, the raw emotion of the moment bringing you closer than ever before. You are crying in his embrace, the tears flowing freely as the tension and relief of the confrontation with your father wash over you.

But it feels just as good to Joel, this shared vulnerability. Sharing the not-so-great times as well as the good times – this is what being with someone is truly all about. The good thing is that you don't have to keep anything secret anymore, and better still, you both have your dad's blessing.

Probably the most important thing for Joel, because without his best friend and the woman he loves, where would he be?

"We good?" you sniffle, rubbing your puffy eyes as you look up at Joel. He lifts your face from his chest, holding you close.

"Oh, we're better than good, darlin'," he smiles back at you. "We're perfect," he tells you, stroking your hair as you lie silent for a long time.

"I love you," you eventually murmur, drifting into a dreamless sleep with a little smile playing on your lips.

"And I love you more," he promises you, kissing your forehead goodnight. He's already waiting for the morning so he can tell you the same again, his heart swelling with the knowledge that you are his, and he is yours, without the need for secrecy or shame.

The weight of the evening has lifted, replaced by a sense of relief and contentment. No longer do you have to tiptoe around, hiding your love and affection. Your father's blessing, though not without its reservations, is a testament to the depth of your connection and the trust he has in Joel to care for you.

As you sleep peacefully in Joel's arms, he can't help but feel a profound sense of gratitude. This woman, this life, is more than he ever dared to dream of. With your father's acceptance, the path ahead is clearer, and Joel is determined to cherish every moment, to build a future that will make you both proud.

As you stir from the depths of slumber, the remnants of a dream linger, tantalizing and vivid. Joel's image flickers in your mind, a hunger burning behind your eyelids, a relentless craving that claws at your senses.

With a slow, drowsy blink, reality floods back, engulfing you in a haze of sensation. Heat coils low in your belly, radiating outward as awareness seeps into every pore. And then you feel it—the intoxicating pressure between your thighs, a languid caress that sends sparks shooting up your spine.

Your gaze drifts downward, heart pounding in your chest as you take in the sight before you. Joel lies beneath the duvet, his form obscured yet unmistakable in the dim light. His rugged features are softened by the shadows, the scruff of his beard grazing your skin like a promise unspoken.

A shiver courses through you as his tongue dances over your slick folds, igniting a firestorm of need that threatens to consume you whole. Your back arches involuntarily, a breathy sigh escaping your lips as pleasure blossoms deep within.

"Joel... fuck..." you moan, the words torn from your throat in a desperate plea for more. His head emerges from beneath the covers, lips glistening with your essence, eyes smoldering with untamed desire.

"You gotta be quiet, darlin'," he murmurs, his voice thick with a southern drawl that sends shivers cascading down your spine. "Might wake the whole house up. Can you do that for me, be a good girl?"

Your heart pounds in your chest, pulse racing as his words wash over you like a wave crashing against the shore. With a nod, you bite down on your lip, a silent promise of compliance as you surrender to the whirlwind of sensation engulfing you.

As Joel's tongue delves deeper, tracing patterns of ecstasy along your sensitive flesh, your senses spiral out of control. Every flick, every swirl sends shockwaves of pleasure cascading through your body, igniting a fierce inferno that threatens to consume you whole.

"Fuck, Joel," you whimper, fingers tangling in the sheets as you surrender to the heady rush of sensation. His touch is electric, setting your nerve endings ablaze with a fervor unlike anything you've ever known.

With a low growl, Joel's lips capture yours in a searing kiss, his tongue tangling with yours in a passionate dance of desire. His hands roam over your trembling form, tracing the curves of your body with reverent exploration.

"You taste like heaven, darlin'," he murmurs against your skin, his breath hot against your ear. "Gonna make you scream my name until the whole damn house knows who you belong to."

A shudder wracks your body at his words, desire pooling low in your belly as you succumb to the primal urge driving you both. With a wordless plea, you arch into his touch, craving more of him with every fiber of your being.

Joel's fingers slip between your thighs, finding you slick and ready for him. With a wicked grin, he teases your entrance, circling your clit with agonizing slowness before plunging deep inside you with a single, relentless thrust.

"Fuck, yes," you cry out, the words torn from your lips in a breathless plea for more. Joel's pace quickens, each thrust driving you higher and higher until you're teetering on the edge of oblivion.

In the soft glow of morning light streaming through the window, you find yourself tangled in Joel's embrace, limbs intertwined in a mess of sheets and limbs. His chest rises and falls with each breath, the rhythmic cadence a comforting lullaby as you revel in the aftermath of your shared passion.

With a tender sigh, Joel presses a lingering kiss to your forehead, his touch gentle against your feverish skin. "God, you're beautiful," he murmurs, his voice thick with emotion. "I could spend eternity right here, just like this."

You feel the heat stain your cheeks at his words, warmth flooding your veins at the intensity of his gaze. "I feel the same way," you whisper, fingers tracing lazy patterns over his chest. "Being with you like this... it's like coming home."

Joel's lips curve into a tender smile, his eyes alight with adoration as he brushes a strand of hair from your face. "You're my home, darlin'," he murmurs, his voice a soft rasp that sends shivers dancing down your spine. "And I'll do anything to make sure you feel safe and loved, always."

His words linger in the air, a comforting blanket enveloping you. In Joel's embrace, you discover a sense of peace, a haven amidst life's storms. Here, in this quiet moment, you realize that with Joel beside you, and you're so excited and can't wait to see what happens next.

As the morning sun filtered through the kitchen window, casting a warm glow over the breakfast table, you took a deep breath and shared the news with Sarah and Tommy. The revelation of your relationship with Joel and your decision to stay with them while your dad was away for the week hung in the air, a mix of excitement and nervous anticipation.

Sarah's eyes lit up with joy, her enthusiasm palpable as she practically bounced in her seat, devouring her scrambled eggs with gusto. Tommy, ever the observant one, shot you both a sly look that made your cheeks flush with a mixture of embarrassment and arousal.

You knew you needed to work on being quieter, but it was a challenge when Joel had a way of taking you to heights of pleasure that left you gasping and moaning, unable to contain the sounds of ecstasy that escaped your lips.

The dynamic between the four of you shifted subtly, a new energy crackling in the air as the unspoken tension of your newfound relationship with Joel lingered between bites of toast and sips of coffee. Sarah's infectious excitement was contagious, her chatter filling the room with a sense of camaraderie and shared secrets.

Tommy's knowing glances added a layer of intrigue to the morning, his playful smirk hinting at a deeper understanding of the dynamics at play. You couldn't help but feel a rush of desire at the thought of Joel's touch, his presence a magnetic pull that left you yearning for more, even in the most mundane moments.

As the morning unfolded, the anticipation of the week ahead hung in the air, a mix of uncertainty and excitement swirling around the breakfast table. The unspoken promise of stolen moments and whispered confessions added a layer of tension to the morning routine, turning the mundane into something charged with possibility.

With each passing minute, the weight of your decision to stay with Sarah and Tommy while your dad was away settled over you, a mix of nerves and anticipation building in the pit of your stomach.

As the sun dipped below the horizon, casting a warm golden glow over the landscape, you found yourself in the midst of a perfect evening with Joel. The air was filled with the sweet scent of blooming flowers, and the gentle rustle of leaves in the breeze created a soothing backdrop to your shared moment.

Joel's hand in yours felt like a perfect fit, his touch sending a shiver of anticipation down your spine. The two of you had decided to take a leisurely stroll through the nearby park, the soft grass underfoot adding to the sense of intimacy that enveloped you both.

As you walked side by side, the conversation flowed effortlessly between you, a mix of playful banter and heartfelt confessions that deepened the connection between you. Joel's laughter was like music to your ears, his Texan drawl adding a touch of charm to every word he spoke.

"You know, darlin', I can't get enough of these little moments with you," Joel said, his gaze warm and adoring. "It's like the rest of the world just fades away when I'm with you."

You felt a blush creep across your cheeks, your heart fluttering at his words. "I feel the same way, Joel. Being here with you, it's like everything else just falls away."

The setting sun painted the sky in hues of pink and orange, casting a romantic glow over the scene. You couldn't help but steal glances at Joel, his features bathed in the warm light, his eyes reflecting the beauty of the moment.

As you reached a secluded spot by a tranquil pond, Joel's gaze met yours, a silent understanding passing between you. Without a word, he pulled you into his arms, his touch sending a surge of desire through you. The world around you faded away, leaving only the two of you in a bubble of shared intimacy.

"I can't get enough of you," Joel murmured, his voice low and husky. "Every moment with you feels like a dream."

You melted into his embrace, the heat of his body searing through you. The air crackled with tension, desire simmering just beneath the surface as you lost yourselves in each other.

The soft rustle of the wind in the trees provided a gentle soundtrack to your shared moment, heightening the sense of intimacy between you. In that perfect moment, surrounded by the beauty of nature and the warmth of Joel's touch, you felt a sense of peace and contentment wash over you.

As the evening drew to a close, the stars began to twinkle in the darkening sky, casting a magical spell over the night. With Joel by your side, you felt like anything was possible, the future stretching out before you like a blank canvas waiting to be painted with the colors of your love.

The stars had begun to twinkle in the darkening sky, lending an enchanted quality to the night. As you and Joel continued your leisurely stroll through the park, hand-in-hand, you couldn't help but be filled with a sense of wonder and possibility.

As if reading your thoughts, Joel squeezed your hand gently, his dimpled smile lighting up his features. "What's got you smiling like that, darlin'?" he asked, his affectionate nickname for you causing a flutter in your heart.

"I don't know," you replied honestly. "I just feel so... happy."

Joel's smile widened at your words. "Me too. Being here with you feels like magic."

You walked in comfortable silence for a while, taking in the sights and sounds around you. The chirping of crickets, the rustle of leaves in the gentle breeze, the distant hum of traffic - it all blended together to create a peaceful symphony that added to the romantic atmosphere.

As you reached a small clearing by a pond, Joel guided you towards a bench tucked away under a weeping willow tree. Sitting down beside him, you leaned against his shoulder as he wrapped an arm around you.

"This is perfect," he said softly, gazing out at the tranquil water. "Just being here with you under this beautiful sky."

The next few days were a whirlwind of stolen glances and heated touches, the air thick with unspoken desire and anticipation. Every stolen moment with Joel left you breathless, your skin tingling with the promise of what was to come. The thought of your father's imminent return lingered in the back of your mind, but in Joel's arms, the world faded away, leaving only the two of you in a bubble of shared intimacy.

One evening, as you stood side by side in the cozy kitchen, the scent of simmering spices filling the air, Joel's presence was a magnetic pull you couldn't resist. Without warning, he pulled you into his arms, his lips capturing yours in a searing kiss that left you dizzy with need.

"I've been craving this all day, darlin'," Joel murmured against your lips, his breath hot against your skin.

A soft giggle escaped your lips, your fingers trailing down the strong lines of his jaw. "You certainly know how to make a girl feel special, don't you?"

Joel's eyes gleamed with mischief, a wicked grin playing on his lips. "Oh, sweetheart, you have no idea what I have in store for you. I'm just gettin’ started."

Before you could respond, Joel scooped you up in his arms, a playful glint in his eyes as he carried you towards the bedroom. Your heart raced with excitement, your arms wrapping around his neck as he laid you down on the soft sheets, his body pressing against yours in a deliciously intimate embrace.

The room was bathed in a soft, golden light, the air heavy with the promise of passion and desire. Joel's touch ignited a fire within you, his hands roaming your body with a hunger that mirrored your own. Every caress, every kiss, sent a jolt of electricity through you, building the tension between you to a fever pitch.

Joel's breath was hot against your skin, his body moving in time with the rhythm of your own desires. He pulled away for a moment, gazing into your eyes, the only source of light in the room casting shadows across his face. "I love you," he whispered, his voice husky with need.

You couldn't respond, lost in the intensity of the moment. Your heart pounded in your chest, matching the throbbing pulse of desire between your legs. With a low growl, Joel moved his lips to yours once more, his tongue probing your mouth with a fierce hunger.

The sound of your labored breaths, mingling with the low growls of desire that escaped his lips. The air grew heavy with anticipation, charged by the electricity that crackled between you. His fingers traced the sensitive skin at the apex of your thighs, sending shivers of pleasure coursing through your veins.

The heat radiating from his body, the primal energy pulsing between you. As he pulled you closer, your muscles tensed in anticipation, every cell in your body yearning for the connection.

His lips met yours in a searing kiss, their tongues dancing together in a frenzied tango of need. You could taste the sweetness of desire on his lips, the tang of salt from your tears of pleasure. His hands roamed your body, exploring every inch of your skin as if committing it to memory.

You couldn't help but feel a thrill of excitement as he spoke those words. You wanted nothing more than to take him into your mouth, venturing into the world of pleasure and sin that awaited you. You opened your mouth, allowing your tongue to dart out and wet your lips in anticipation, his eyes never leaving yours.

He guided his erection towards your mouth, the velvety head brushing against your lips. You opened wider, welcoming his invasion. His eyes darkened, and he groaned as you enveloped the entirety of his shaft in your warm embrace. You began to suck gently, the rhythmic motion of your head creating a wet, slurpy sound as your lips and tongue massaged him.

As he thrust deeper into your mouth, you struggled to breathe, your lungs involuntarily attempting to escape the suffocating embrace of his thick, pulsating member. Yet, you remained steadfast, determined to please him, to satiate his carnal desires.

His animalistic groans echoed in your ears, as though the very walls of the room had begun to quiver in response to his euphoric release. You could feel his veins, now bulging with the ferocity of his climax, vibrate against your sensitive lips and tongue, heightening the already intense sensations coursing through your body.

You could feel his heart pounding wildly, the rhythm syncing with the beats of your own. The room was filled with his scent, musk and sweat, a potent mix that drove you on. Your tongue swirled around his hard length, savoring the taste of him.

His hands gave your head a gentle squeeze, urging you on. His pleasure was your reward, the way his breath hitched and his hips thrust harder. You moved your head in time with his, sucking him deep, keeping a steady rhythm as his release approached.

The sudden tightening of his body spoke of his climax, and you knew you had to continue. Your lips glided up and down his shaft, focusing all your attention on the growing flutters within him.

Finally, he groaned, his release a hot, salty flood that filled your mouth. You swallowed quickly, eager to please him, the taste lingering on your tongue like the first bite of a ripe peach. He pulled away, breathless and flushed, his eyes locked on yours in a silent communion of satisfaction.

“You’re turn, darlin’,” Joel says, his eyes dark and his voice deep as midnight. You feel him grab your hips and begins to devour you, kissing every inch of skin and grabbing your body with an almost primal hunger. The air around you seems to grow thick with desire as you cling to him, your breath catching in your throat. He slides his hands up under your shirt, his fingers tracing the curve of your spine, and you can't help but arch into his touch, moaning softly.

Joel's lips trail down your neck, and you suck in a sharp breath as his teeth gently scrape against your delicate skin. A warm flush spreads across your body, and you feel yourself growing bolder, more willing with each passing moment. He bites down gently, leaving a mark that matches the one he gave you days ago, and you shudder with pleasure.

His lips explore every part of your body, getting closer and closer to your core. You can feel the heat radiating from him, his desire for you palpable in his every touch. The pace quickens as he takes your bottom lip between his teeth, biting down gently, a possession claim of sorts. Your breath hitches, your heart pounding in your chest, every nerve ending tingling with anticipation.

His hands, strong and calloused, graze the soft skin at the nape of your neck, expertly unfastening the delicate clasp of your dress. It falls to the ground, pooling around your ankles, leaving you exposed in just a lace-edged bra and matching underwear.

Simultaneously, his hands slide beneath your underwear, his fingers exploring, tracing patterns and leaving trails of fire on your skin. He pauses, his eyes locking with yours, his gaze fierce and unyielding. In that moment, you feel a connection, a bond that transcends physical desire. It's more than just lust; it's passion, raw and unbridled.

The room is filled with the sounds of heavy breathing, skin against skin, and moans of pleasure, creating a symphony of desire that drowns out any other noise.

The air is heavy with the scent of sweat and musk, a heady mixture that serves to heighten the sensual atmosphere. The lingering scent of scented candles adds a touch of sweetness to the mix.

You can't take it anymore. The anticipation, the desire, it's all too much. Your body is on fire, begging for release. And Joel knows it.

"Fuck, Joel, please," you whine, your hips grinding against his in desperation.

He chuckles darkly, his lips grazing against your neck. "Alright, baby," he murmurs, and before you know it, he has entered you.

His cock slides into your weeping hole with ease; you're slick and wet from both arousal and anticipation. You gasp at the feeling of him filling you up completely, every inch of him stretching you in all the right ways.

Joel's movements are slow and deliberate at first, as if savoring every moment. But soon enough, the pace quickens as he pounds into you with a primal need.

Your bodies move together in perfect harmony, each thrust sending shivers of pleasure through you.

Moans and gasps escape your lips uncontrollably as Joel hits all the right spots within you. Every touch feels like electricity coursing through your veins; every kiss like a fire burning between you two.

Your fingers grip onto his back desperately as he brings you closer to the edge. Your moans become louder and more frantic as your body tenses with impending release.

With one final thrust, Joel pushes both of you over the edge into pure ecstasy. Your bodies tremble together as wave after wave of pleasure washes over you. You cling onto each other tightly as powerful orgasms rock through your bodies.

As you come down from your high, Joel pulls out of you gently and collapses beside you on the bed. Your breathing is heavy and labored as both of your hearts beat in sync.

Joel pulls a blanket over both of your naked bodies before wrapping an arm around your waist and pulling you close to him. You snuggle into his chest contentedly, feeling more satisfied and loved than you ever have before.

The sunlight streams in through the window, casting a warm glow over your tangled bodies. You stir, slowly coming to consciousness as the events of last night flood back to you.

Your eyes flutter open and you find yourself staring into Joel's deep brown gaze. He smiles at you, his fingers still tracing soothing patterns on your skin.

"I love you," he says, his words soft and sincere.

The sound of his voice is filled with love and emotion, sending butterflies fluttering in your stomach.

You smile and snuggle closer to him, basking in the warmth of his love. It's a feeling like no other, one that fills you with happiness and contentment.

As you lay there together in peaceful silence, memories of how the two of you came to be fill your mind. And it was the best decision either of you had ever made.

"I can't imagine my life without you," Joel whispers, breaking the silence between you two.

Tears prick at your eyes at his words. You feel overwhelmed with emotion - gratefulness for having someone like him in your life and overwhelming love for him.

"I feel the same way," you reply honestly, turning to look into his eyes once again. "I never want to lose you."

Joel leans in and kisses you gently, sealing his promise with actions rather than words. And as your lips move against each other's in a sweet embrace, all doubts fade away.

This is real and true love; a connection that goes beyond physical attraction or fleeting emotions.

It was a connection that defied reason and logic, a force that could not be contained or explained. It was a love that knew no boundaries and bloomed in every corner of their being, the sweetest melody that echoed in their hearts with every beat.

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bed-chemist · 2 months ago

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❝i got the flavor that lasts❞

a/n: liv walks up to the stage. a random cough cuts through the otherwise silent crowd. she taps the mic, causing deafening feedback. “is this thing still on?” she asks, but no one laughs…

Chapter Summary: Chef Joel cooks up a Christmas surprise while the sweetest baker makes a terrifying discovery.

Chapter Warnings: language, slight age gap (F!MC and Joel are 6 years apart), symptoms of anxiety and depression, panic attacks, side character in a relationship involving domestic violence (main character notices bruises and they have a conversation about it), smut, slight breeding kink if you squint, fluff, comfort, lmk if i forgot something.

Series Tags: chef! Joel, single! father Joel, no outbreak! Joel Miller, slow burn, dual-pov, fluff, flirting, friendship, eventually established relationship, eventual smut, original character, black!fem!MC, no y/n.

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ 9k words ⋆ series masterlist ⋆ spotify playlist ˖ ݁ 𖥔.

The day starts the same as any other. My first vibration-only alarm rumbles beneath my pillow, and I quickly shut it off. I grumble as I disconnect my limbs from Joel’s, reluctantly pulling myself out of bed. An invisible string yanks my body into the bathroom to prepare for the day. When I look over my shoulder, Joel shifts in the bed until his back faces me. Rubbing the sleep out of my eyes, I process the ping of annoyance in my brain. If you drop a pin, I’m awake. But if you drop a house on Joel, he’d just readjust the foundation’s position.

I quickly prepare for the day, not showering to keep Joel’s scent on me. My curls are unruly, so I grab my spritz bottle and some leave-in conditioner to breathe life into it again. Once my curls look presentable, I grab a scrunchie to secure a half-up, half-down ponytail. When I pull my hair tight, my arms fall to my side.

The bright light above the mirror makes me squint when I look in. The only thing I see when I look back is my poodle-shaped hairstyle, and I snort. Shaking my head, I walk away from the mirror so I don't pick myself apart.

Slipping out of the bathroom, I tip-toe back to Joel, whose back is still towards me. His breathing remains slow as I sink into the mattress on my knees. I extend my body over him, reaching for my phone on the charger next to his head. His hot breath fans over my hand while I’m fumbling with the charger that won't let go of my phone.

A curse leaves my lips, and I drop my phone into the mattress, opting to forget about it when, just then, my second alarm starts going off. ‘Busy Woman’ by Sabrina Carpenter fills the room, causing Joel to jolt awake. His hard body collides with mine, sending me flying off the edge of the bed.

A shrill cry leaves echoes back to me off the walls when my butt nearly hits the floor, but Joel’s hands are already on me. He quickly pulls me to safety and back into him. My chest rises and falls quickly, out of breath from shock. “Do you know you’re the clumsiest person I’ve ever met?” Joel asks with a raised eyebrow.

“I’m working on it.” I flash a smile, and he returns it, flushing my cheeks. No matter how long we’ve known each other, he still causes a flurry of butterflies in my stomach. “Can you turn that off?” I ask, pointing to the loud noise that my phone is emitting.

He nods, hitting the button before returning his attention to me. The air between us is thick with sexual tension, and his eyes burn a smooth hole through my head. “What?” I ask, hoping he’ll speak first and let me off the hook.

His palms make contact with my upper thighs, causing me to freeze. He inches his way up to my hips until he’s gripping my waist deliciously. He lifts slightly before flipping us both until I’m on my back beneath him. “I love waking up with you,” he rasps, dipping his head down to pepper kisses on my face. I let out a light giggle, wrapping my arms around his neck. “It’s different every time,” he murmurs with his lips on my cheek.

He pulls back slightly, allowing me to keep him close. “Me too,” I smile, attempting to sit up and give him a peck on the lips.

His head jerks back, and my brows knit on my head. He’s never actively dodged a kiss from me. Maybe it’s his morning breath, but I don’t care. I pull him down closer to close the gap, but he puts his hands on my forearms, disconnecting my hold on him.

A ping of worry hits my chest, and I’m already attempting to sit up more, but Joel blocks my way. “Let’s move in together,” he exclaims.

My breathing is restricted, and my mouth dries. My temples tighten, and energy moves from my head to my toes. “Joel,” I manage to squeak.

“We can stay here or at mine until we find a bigger place for all of us, but,” he starts.

My eyes blink rapidly, trying to shake myself out of the hyperfocus I’ve put on Joel’s dark silhouette this early morning. “You can’t be serious,” I scoff.

Joel’s face scrunches, almost as if my statement offended him. “Why not?” he questions.

I sigh, allowing my eyes to roll naturally. It’s far too early in the morning to converse like this with a man who excels in weaponizing his ignorance. “Firstly, it’s five thirty in the morning. Secondly, we’ve only been dating for a month. Third, we just had this conversation on Friday,” I put plainly.

“We’ve known each other for six,” I hear him counter while my eyes drill holes into the ceiling.

As if that makes things more acceptable. My eyes narrow at Joel’s, and I almost get lost swimming in his espresso-colored eyes. “Meeting someone and knowing them is different from dating someone.”

His fingers move a curl off my shoulder until my neck is fully exposed to him. His fingertips ghost over my pulse, drawing mindless lines into my skin. “It's not for me. Couldn't stop thinkin’ about you, Sugar,” he confesses.

I try not to let my disbelief in his words show, but I know my face is slipping. Although, he can’t expect me to be bubbly right now when the birds just started chirping outside. “You’re a liar,” I taunt.

“Serious as a heart attack. Every time Leo came in, I’d ask about you. Thought ‘bout you every steak I flipped,” he grunts, shifting closer to put his face in my neck. His scruff tickles my neck, and his morning face's rasp makes me smile. Leo never said anything about his meetings with Joel after my birthday, although I know they took place. “How could I forget the gorgeous woman who gave me my first one-star review,” he asks rhetorically, pressing a warm kiss to the pulse point he identified just moments ago.

He nips at my skin with his tongue following shortly after, warming the painfully delicious sensation. “You’re playing dirty,” I utter breathlessly.

He continues down my neck to my collarbone, looking up at me through his long lashes. “’m not playin’ at all. Would make me feel better if we moved in together,” he seduces.

My head tilts to the side, and I subconsciously run my hands through his curly locks. “What do you mean?”

“Knowing you’re safe and alive in our bed. I’ll finally be able to breathe,” Joel exhales against my chest. Then it clicks for me; he’s referencing our conversation from last night. Our heads faced each other under the Sunday moonlight as we engaged in the most profound pillow talk I’ve ever experienced. He told me about Sarah’s death, explaining that it was sudden. He hadn’t known she was struggling with depression before she took her life. When he found her he became inconsolable.

I cried so much Friday that I’m still dehydrated. The ten minutes after Joel opened up to me only made recovering now worse. I relate to him because I’ve been obsessed with my friends and family driving safely since my parent’s accident. Even though I know they were driving safely as they always were, sometimes freak accidents happen. It still doesn’t shake my uneasy feeling when I haven’t heard from a loved one in a while.

With Joel, he always needs to watch me fall asleep first. He doesn’t say it, but I know that’s why he sleeps so hard in the morning; a weight releases from his shoulders when I make it through the night. He always tells me to close my eyes, and I become exhausted when my head hits the pillow. I guess that’s the point; Joel’s request is connected to Sarah’s situation. At the moment, I’m unsure if moving in with him would ease his anxiety or offer him a crutch to not work through his issues.

After I cleaned myself up, we sat in the book nook and talked about our futures together. Joel told me that I was it for him. If things don’t work with me, there’s no one else he’d be willing to try with. He confessed he didn’t feel he could handle getting close to another person.

I knew I felt the same way, but a frog seemed to get caught in my throat at the time. He comforted me by telling me I didn’t need to say anything. My head just swayed to the side, fogging up the glass of the tiny corner of my room. I allowed him to usher me to bed shortly after, content with not pushing him towards sleeping either.

Suddenly, I want to run. I want to sprint far away from a life of comfort with Joel and Ellie. I want to throw the specimen of pure sex off my body and bolt. In my head, Maddie’s voice mutters, “Savor this moment. Do not let your urge to run ruin the love of your life asking you to move in.”

I assume Joel takes my frozen silence as a no, and he lifts his head, looking at me with hurt eyes. “Say you’ll move in with me, Sugar,” he half pleads. “’m gettin’ old, Sugar, and I want to start a life with you.”

A snort leaves my nose, and I slap his shoulder with amusement. “You’re not getting old. You’re only thirty-two,” I say through a fit of giggles.

“And if we start now, I’ll be fifty when our first kid graduates high school,” he deadpans.

More laughter slips through my lips to his apparent dismay. “Shouldn’t I be the one asking you about this kind of stuff?” I question him. Typically, the woman comes to the man about getting too old.

His nose scrunches, and I search his face for the answer. “Is this about what El said last night?” I add.

Before we escaped to the seclusion of my bedroom last night, Ellie mentioned something about always wanting a sibling. The thought made my stomach churn, and I wasn’t quite sure where Joel stood before our deep conversation. Now, I’m wondering if her teenage words got to him.

He shakes his head, answering before his mouth can correct himself. “Well, yeah,” he bashfully looks away.

My hands slide up to his warm cheeks, bringing his attention back to me. “You seem conflicted,” I point out.

He sighs, looking over my shoulder at the electric clock on my nightstand. “You’re right, it’s early. Forget I asked,” he crawls off me, his disappointment emitted from his body. He slunks into the bathroom like a sad puppy, with the door smacking the pane when he slides it shut. A sigh leaves my lips, and I let my eyes float towards the ceiling.

This is not how I wanted to be: so guarded that I can’t let him in. I want to give myself to him because I subconsciously know he’ll keep me safe. But similarly to him, the last time I let someone in, they left me. While I’m prone to running, he’s prone to clinging.

I let my thoughts mull for a bit before sitting up fully. There’s not a sound decision I can come to without coffee, so I walk over to my keys. Sliding out to the hallway, I’m careful to creep past where Ellie’s still sleeping in the guest room. I realize my attempts are futile seconds later when Toph and Katara start crying through the door. When my head turns to look towards the door, their tiny paws claw underneath the seal to be let out for the morning.

As if my body is put in reverse, I slightly crack Ellie’s door, allowing the kittens their freedom. The fact that she’s still asleep gives me time to start their morning routine of breakfast and water, and I enjoy the moment of silence. It only takes me a few minutes to finish the tasks when Joel walks into the kitchen.

He silently slides past me, his face undetectable. He grabs his keys and wallet from the counter, sliding them into his back pockets. Tension fills the room as I stand on my toes to grab my travel mug from the cupboards. Once the pink mug is secured underneath my arm, I return to Joel. “Do you have time to go get coffee with me?”

He extends his arm to scratch the back of his neck. “Tommy wants to have a staff meeting before we open, but I’ll walk you out, Sugar,” he excuses himself.

I check the clock above the kitten’s food bowl, which they’re busy devouring. “At six am?” I ask, slightly calling out the lie.

He puts his hand on the small of my back, ushering me towards coat hooks. “Yes,” he answers curtly.

I don’t argue, watching him take my jacket off the hook. He methodically opens the garment, holding it out for me. I quickly slip into it, turning around to face him. “The restaurant opens at eleven…” I let my suspicion slip.

He glares at me, running a hand through his short curls. “Damn, Ginny. Are you tryin' to ruin the surprise?” he questions, seemingly frustrated.

My ears perk up. “What surprise? I don’t like surprises,” I inform him. The last surprise I got was when I was sixteen. I nearly had a heart attack then, so I have no faith in the outcome of Joel’s surprise.

He turns his back towards me, grabbing his jacket. “Your Christmas present,” he states, dejected, towards the wall.

A sigh of relief leaves my body. Not that I thought Joel was the cheating type; I just didn’t want to question my unwavering trust in him. “Oh, no, I wasn’t. What is it?” I try to coax him into telling me.

He looks over his shoulder, eyebrow raised. “What do you want it to be?” he asks with a smirk.

I shrug, kicking my feet towards my shoes. “I don’t know. I don’t think I’d care, as long as it’s from you,” I tell him honestly.

Stepping into the winter boots, I quickly sit on the bench to lace them up. Joel watches me struggle for one second, and he’s getting on the ground, lifting my calf in his hand. He props my foot into his knee, lacing the shoe methodically. “What do you need for Christmas, Sugar? What’s the one thing you’ve never had before?” he asks.

My bottom lip rolls between my teeth. The one thing I always needed was someone to share the romantic aspects of the holidays with. I always dreamed of wearing matching pajamas with my partner and watching Christmas movies together. I had a boyfriend years ago when my parents were alive, but he never wanted to do any of that stuff.

Joel is the first person who’s given me anything I ask of under the guise of making me happy. I’ve never experienced this much love for a person other than my mom and dad. My feelings seep through my pores, and I become antsy with my reply. “You,” I blurt, drunk on a love-induced haze.

He double knots the shoelace, pausing to check his work. “Well, you have me,” he points out. He puts my foot down, moving to the right one. But something seems to be itching at him.

Suddenly, Joel stops moving, and his eyes anchor on mine. Lightening strikes the space between us, and the universe places an impenetrable bubble. The silence doesn’t last more than a breath, but when Joel licks his lips, I’m nearly leaning into him with anticipation of a kiss.

The pads of his calloused fingers brush against the back of my calf, squeezing lightly. “I love you, Imogen Scott,” Joel voices confidently.

My heart rate quickens and my palms become sweaty, slipping as I grip the edge of the bench. “Joel,” I start before I’m cut off.

Joel shifts closer between my legs. “Let me finish ‘fore I lose my nerve. Throughout this whole thing, I’ve been unsure ‘bout myself. But I know damn well that I love you.” The strength in his voice sends a thrill through me.

I swallow hard, trying to steady myself. “You care ‘bout me, and Ellie. Hell, you even look out for Tommy,” he adds before I can respond. A soft chuckle escapes me; it’s the first sound I’ve made in a while. “You’re kind and talented. You smell like sunshine and flowers. You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen, and from the moment I laid eyes on you, I knew I had to know you,” he continues.

His words wrap around me like warm sunlight. “You treat Ellie like she’s your daughter; we’d be lost without you. I’ve been meanin’ to say this, but I can’t hold it back anymore. You’re the one I wanna spend the rest of my life with,” he finishes, leaving me momentarily speechless.

As his words settle in, tears well in my eyes, and an overwhelming joy washes over me. I gently take his face in my hands, feeling the warmth of his skin. “You don’t have to say nothin’ back,” he says softly, trying to calm me.

I shake my head, trying to get my thoughts together before I burst. “You don’t get to tell me how-how to react, Joel Miller, and right now, all I can think about is how much I-I love you. I love that you’re a leader and how analytical you are. I especially love how amazing of a father you are to Ellie. You care for me and her more than yourself. Your sacrifices don’t go unnoticed,” I stammer.

Joel’s smile is brighter than I’ve ever seen it before. His face is turning a beautiful shade of pink the longer we confess our love to each other. “I love how your brows furrow and the veins pop out in your arms when you're frustrated. You’re my best friend, and I’m pretty sure I’d starve without you. Not to mention the best sex I’ve ever had,” I joke at the end, and he chuckles.

I take a deep breath to speak more confidently. My nerves don’t subside, but I continue anyway. “I love how you make me feel special and wanted. You’re everything to me, Joel. Absolutely everything,” I emphasize at the end, hoping my words can convey how I feel for him.

He nods, and his hands slide up my thighs to pull me to the edge of the bench. “Come here, Sugar,” his arms snaking around my back. His lips crush mine so hard that our teeth click on each other. Neither of us cares, taking the time to let our tongues explore each other’s mouths. A rushing heat strikes my core, and I squirm in his hold. The taste of his tongue is so intoxicating that I have to keep myself from moaning.

My head tilts back, allowing him more access, and I lose myself in the kiss. Annoyingly, the voice in my head reminds me his daughter is right down the hall. We’re trying to leave for work soon, and now is not the time to have a quickie. I want us to take our time and relish in the ability to make love finally. But Joel’s dominance doesn’t relent, pressing me tighter into him. He swallows a mewl from me, and my body becomes sticky in the winter coat.

I break the kiss to breathe and cool the furnace blazing between us. I let out a breathy laugh, and my thoughts begin to wander. I’ve never felt so relieved now that he knows how I feel about him. My thumb ghosts over his plump pink bottom lip, and he kisses the pad.

Now that we’ve said the fateful three words to each other, I feel more at ease with the thought of us living together. There’s only been a handful of times since we had sex the first time that we haven’t stayed the night with each other. My schedule practically revolves around Ellie’s, so we might as well blend our lives thoroughly.

“I’ll think about us moving in together, but only after the holidays,” I say firmly.

He lets out a sigh of relief. “Thank you,” he murmurs, returning to lace up my boot as if he hadn’t just shared something significant. I take in the muscles of his body, noting what I’ll tell him I love later.

He finishes lacing and stands with a grunt, leaving me on the bench to grab my gloves. Once they’re snug, he ties his boots, ignoring any extra layers as he prepares to face the storm. He pulls me up from the bench, linking our hands. I can't help but worry; he could get sick out there.

As he leads me toward the door, I watch his back muscles flex while he pushes it open. “Do you think El will be okay alone while I go get coffee?” I ask, concerned about leaving the teenager sleeping without anyone around when she wakes.

“She’ll be just fine. You need fuel,” Joel replies, ushering me into the stairwell. He reaches back to grab my pink earmuffs before shutting the door.

He quickly turns to me, and I pull my hair back to let him do whatever he needs. “So do you. You still have work after whatever you’re planning,” I retort, gesturing to him with my hand.

He seizes the moment to grab mine, pulling me down the stairs. “I’m fine. I can make somethin’ later,” he reassures me as my worries spill out. I know he can cook; I can’t, which makes his concern clear.

We make it to the bottom of the stairwell, and Joel pulls me closer to him when I step out into the cold. “What are we having for dinner?” I ask, looking far ahead into the future.

The slush forms around our boots with every step down the alley, “Was thinkin’ tortellini. Ain’t had it in a while,” he says, his drawl slow and easy.

My smile beams bright and I squeeze his side. “I love you,” I remind him. Pasta is my second favorite after burgers and fries; we had that for dinner last night. On top of that, no one, and I mean no one, makes pasta like Joel. The fact that he’s constantly making my favorite meals is a sentiment that makes my heart skip a beat.

The corners of his eyes crinkle as a smile spreads across his lips. “I love you too, Sugar,” he says proudly, leaning in to plant a quick kiss on my dry lips.

I relish the warmth in my heart as we turn the corner at the end of the building, stepping out toward the street. Joel frowns and shifts around me, positioning himself between me and the oncoming traffic. “Imogen,” he murmurs, his tone low.

“I’m sorry. I wasn’t paying attention,” I reply, adjusting the mug slipping under my arm.

We approach the street corner by the coffee shop, and Joel presses the crossing signal button. I exhale, my breath visible in the frigid air, trying to move my legs like a little cricket to generate some warmth. Sensing my shivers, Joel wraps his arms around my shoulders. I lean into him, closing my eyes and ignoring the biting cold on my face.

When the signal changes, we quickly cross in front of the inviting glow of the coffee shop sign.

“I’ll text you and Ellie after the lunch rush, Sugar. Be careful out there,” he says, smoothing down my curls. He kisses my temple, and his cologne envelops me like a familiar cardigan, making me lose track of time by the nearly revolving door.

I raise an eyebrow when our gazes meet. “With what? Measuring the ingredients?”

He pulls me close, holding the front of my coat. “You know what I mean. Holiday shoppers are wild, Ginny,” he replies, leaving me with no room to argue.

As he steps back, I immediately start rubbing my legs for warmth. He opens the door for me, practically nudging me into the cozy coffee shop. I turn to wave goodbye, but he’s already jogging down the street.

With a heavy sigh, I turn to absorb the atmosphere of the bustling coffee shop. The space is cramped, with only a few small tables and a narrow bar against the window, barely accommodating the ever-growing line snaking out the door. The shop offers no food selections or reading materials, and the ambient lighting creates a cozy ambiance that contrasts sharply with the blinding glare of the snow outside.

As I wait, my thoughts drift to the holiday cookies I need to bake today per the suggestion from my social media manager. She insists that livestreaming my baking sessions could significantly boost traffic to the store. I’m intrigued by the idea, picturing a vibrant online audience watching as I mix, frost, and decorate, but I can’t shake the nerves.

Finally, I reach the front of the line, only to realize I still haven’t spotted Willow, the shop's owner. Usually, she’s a whirlwind of energy, darting between tables and the counter, especially during the holiday rush. Just as I’m about to ask the barista about her, an electrifying presence fills the room, shifting the air around me.

A sharp squeal pierces the chatter, and I mentally note to introduce Willow to Madi. Both women have an uncanny ability to light up any room they enter, and I can’t help but think they would make an unstoppable pair. “Is that my favorite baker?” Willow’s voice rings out proudly as she emerges from behind the counter, her arms outstretched for a warm embrace.

“Hi, Will,” I say, smiling into her hold. The familiar scent of freshly brewed coffee and cinnamon envelops me. Once we step back, I ask, “How are you?”

“I’m good! It’s been a while since Joel’s been getting your coffee every morning,” she teases, giving me a playful nudge.

My cheeks flush at the suggestion that Joel has been picking up coffee for me daily. Since he started, my interactions with Willow have dwindled. I know they’ve developed a friendship, chatting about smart business strategies and sharing ideas, which I’m glad for—Joel needs someone to brainstorm with, especially since Tommy and I lack that business-minded focus.

Tucking my cold hands into the depths of my pockets, I reply, “I know, I felt like I needed to show my face.”

Willow darts behind the counter, effortlessly replacing the cashier and assigning them another task. She reminds me of a more polished version of myself, navigating her responsibilities with grace. Organized and innovative, her creativity shines through in her unique coffee concoctions. “The usual?” she inquires, raising an eyebrow, her playful curiosity evident.

“Yes, please,” I murmur, lowering my gaze, not wanting to draw the attention of the bustling coffee shop around us.

My feet shuffle forward as I pull my wallet from my coat pocket, the chill of the air biting at my skin. Willow purses her lips, shaking her head firmly. “It’s on the house,” she insists, her voice warm yet authoritative.

I shake my head vigorously, determined to assert my independence. “No, it’s not. Mine was at least $6. Let me pay you,” I plead, urgency creeping into my voice.

Willow narrows her eyes at me, her tone sharp and playful. “Ginny, don’t you dare.”

The sudden shift in her demeanor catches me off guard, and I instinctively raise my hands in surrender. But as she turns away to set my cup at the front of the line, I seize the opportunity, quickly swiping a twenty from my wallet and sneakily dropping it into the tip jar.

Stepping to the side, I wait as she chats with her colleagues, the warmth of the shop contrasting with the chill outside. When Willow finally joins me, her expression shifts, and she begins, “I want to talk to you about something.”

My body fills with concern as I scan her from head to toe, the frantic energy of the moment tightening my chest. “Okay, are you alright?” I ask, urgency lacing my voice.

“Yeah, it’s nothing personal. I was just wondering if you had time to look at the proposal I sent you last week. I didn’t hear anything about it,” she replies, her tone steady yet tinged with disappointment.

A wave of shame washes over me as I recall our casual conversation about starting a bookstore café together. We had dreamt aloud, imagining a cozy space brimming with romance novels, my pastries nestled beside her expertly brewed coffee. It was the perfect haven for book clubs and events I’d longed to host at Daylight, but which had never attracted enough interest.

As I speak, my gaze inadvertently drifts to Willow’s neck. I squint, my heart sinking as I take in the unmistakable dark bruises mottling her skin just below her jaw. They stand out sharply against her complexion, like a warning sign. A cold knot of concern twists in my stomach. Despite our camaraderie, an unsettling feeling creeps in when her boyfriend is around—a lingering doubt that makes me question everything.

“Oh um, sorry I’ve been busy. I must’ve forgotten to look at the email,” I say, forcing my focus back to her words, though the sight of those bruises looms in my mind.

“Will you at least consider it when you open it?” she asks, her eyes searching mine.

I hesitate, a blush creeping into my cheeks as I shrug. Daylight was my first venture, one I had nurtured mostly alone, and the thought of sharing control was daunting. “I don’t know. Starting a new business sounds stressful, especially since we just got out of the red,” I admit, my worries now tinged with a deeper concern for her.

Willow bites her plum lips, a flicker of disappointment crossing her face. She nods slightly, and I can see the glimmer of hope begin to dim.

Leaning in closer, I lower my voice, ensuring it’s just for her. “But can I get back to you after the holidays?” I propose, wanting to keep the door open.

Her face brightens with a small smile. “For sure, we can meet at Daylight, and I’ll bring the coffee,” she responds, her enthusiasm returning. “Speaking of, I think yours is coming up,” she adds, glancing toward the counter, where the barista is preparing my drink.

When she crosses in front of me, my gaze drifts back to those bruises. She returns a couple moments later with my cup, but I still can’t shake the concern gnawing at me. “Willow,” I say, my voice softening, “can I ask… what happened to your neck?”

At the mention of her bruises, Willow’s demeanor shifts. Her smile falters, and I notice her eyes flicker with a hint of nervousness. She waves a hand dismissively, but I can see the tension in her posture. “Oh, it’s nothing. Just a little mishap,” she says, her voice too light, too rehearsed.

But I can’t let it go. “It doesn’t look like nothing. Are you sure you’re okay?” My eyes search hers, hoping for honesty.

She hesitates, the flicker of vulnerability in her gaze making my heart race. “Really, Ginny, I’m fine. Just clumsy, you know?”

I don’t believe her. The tension hangs heavy, and the doubt lingers between us. “If you need to talk about anything, I’m here,” I say, my voice firm but gentle, unwilling to drop the subject entirely.

“I know, and thank you,” she responds, her voice barely above a whisper.

Willow’s smile looks plastered on, strained at the edges, as she blinks a couple of times, attempting to shake off the weight of our previous conversation. She shifts her weight from one foot to the other, her fingers fiddling with the hem of her sweater. “So, what are you and Joel doing for the holidays?” she quickly changes the subject, her voice a touch too bright.

I take a breath, eager to share a bit of our plans. “We have an obligation to go to Christmas dinner at my friend Madi’s house since Joel is her family’s holiday chef. They’re loaded. But after that, we’ll probably come back to the city. Do you and your boyfriend have plans?” I reply, noting the way her eyes flicker, as if she’s gauging my reaction.

Willow’s gaze drops for a moment, her enthusiasm fading. “I’m not sure. We usually just stay here for all the holidays because my family is in Seattle,” she says, her voice trailing off, the cheeriness dimming as she speaks.

I step a bit closer, feeling a sense of urgency. “Is it just going to be the two of you?” I quickly ask, my eagerness to extend an invitation evident in my tone.

“Yeah,” she sighs glumly, the weight of that single word hanging between us like a fog. I can’t help but feel a sense of dread. I wonder if Josh might have something to do with the bruises on her neck. The thought unsettles me; I want to pull her away from him. I know Joel would never do something like this to me, but I can’t be sure about Josh.

Firming my resolve, I want to bring her some holiday cheer. “You should come with us to Christmas dinner at Madi’s and come over the next morning for breakfast,” I suggest, my heart racing at the thought of her joining us.

Willow shakes her head, looking conflicted. “Oh no, I can’t crash your Christmas,” she protests, but I can see a flicker of interest in her eyes.

“Yes, you can. You can finally meet all the people I talk about,” I insist, feeling the urge to pull her into our festive circle.

Her expression falters again, and I can tell she’s weighing her options. “I don’t know. Josh might be in a mood. Can I let you know later?” she replies, her voice uncertain, and I sense a hesitation beneath her words.

I offer a reassuring smile, trying to ease her worries. “Yeah, of course. Joel cooks the whole day before and he’s making more than enough food for everyone to go for thirds,” I reassure her, hoping to dispel her doubts and get her out of that situation.

“Okay, thanks for the invite,” she says, a hint of warmth returning to her tone, though I can still see the uncertainty lingering in her eyes.

I glance at my watch, knowing I need to head out. “Of course. I have to actually go work now,” I say, shifting my weight, ready to break away.

“Boo,” she replies, a playful pout crossing her lips, her momentary lightness lifting my spirits.

“I know. But I’ll text you!” I say, a smile creeping back onto my face, glad to see her lighten up even just a bit.

“Sounds good,” she says, her eyes brightening just enough to make me feel hopeful as I turn to leave, but I can’t shake the feeling that I need to keep an eye on her boyfriend.

Around 11 PM, the front door slides open to my condo, and the familiar sound pulls me from the fog of exhaustion. I lift my head slightly from the couch, blinking against the dim light to see Joel dragging his feet inside. He looks worn, his shoulders heavy with the weight of work stress. As he kicks off his shoes and sheds his coat, his eyes remain fixed on the ground, the tension radiating off him palpable.

Even with his head bent, I catch the deep furrow in his brow and the way his eyebrows nearly touch in the center, a clear sign of the battles he’s faced throughout the day. I glance down the hall, knowing Ellie might still be awake, and just in case she is, I whisper-shout, “Hey.”

When his espresso-colored eyes finally meet mine, something shifts. The tight lines of his face soften, and a flicker of warmth ignites in his gaze. He lingers at the door, taking a moment to drink me in, as if the sight of me could wash away the day’s burdens. My heart quickens as our eyes lock, and I can’t help but notice the slight curve of his lips that hints at a smile.

“Missed you,” he says, his voice low and sincere, wrapping around me like a warm blanket. The simple honesty of his words sends a thrill through me, and I smile back, feeling an electric tension fill the space between us.

“Me too,” I reply, my voice barely above a whisper. He steps closer, and the air thickens with unspoken emotions. I can feel the heat radiating from him, a magnetic pull that draws me in.

He pulls into his arms as he reaches the couch, and I breathe in his familiar scent—woodsy and comforting. Our bodies fit together perfectly, and for a moment, the world outside fades away. I can feel the weight of his day starting to lift, but there’s something else simmering beneath the surface, a shared understanding of what we mean to each other.

“Why don’t we take a bath?” he suggests, his voice a low rumble against my hair. “We could both use it.”

The idea of soaking in warm water, together, sounds heavenly. “That sounds perfect,” I reply, looking up at him with a smile. His eyes light up with relief and something deeper, a sense of intimacy that makes my heart race.

“Let’s make it cozy,” he adds, his expression playful now. “Candles, maybe?”

I nod, excitement bubbling within me. “I’ll grab some.”

I hurry to gather the candles, setting them around the bathroom while Joel fills it with warm water. The soft glow of the flickering flames creates a soothing atmosphere. When everything is ready, we slide into the tub together, the heat enveloping us like a comforting embrace.

Once we’re settled, Joel takes my feet in his hands, gently lifting one to rest in his lap. I watch as he begins to massage my soles, his fingers working out the tension with a deftness that leaves me sighing in relief. “You really know how to treat a girl,” I tease, a playful smile dancing on my lips.

“I aim to please,” he replies, his gaze steady and warm, a hint of mischief in his eyes.

I beam, slowly pulling back my foot so I can crawl into Joel’s lap. Once I’m in the correct position, I straddle him. “I know another way you could please me,” I nudge as I brush my thumbs over his stubble. “Can I kiss you? I haven’t kissed you in hours,” I mumble, slightly tilting my head. It’s not my fault I can’t get enough of his touch and his taste.

He furrows his brows at my question. “Yeah, Sugar. Ya never have to ask me,” he declares, tightening his arms around my waist.

I smile and lean in slowly, pressing a sweet kiss to his lips. He parts my cracked lips with his tongue and I savor the taste of him. I moan, deepening the kiss and I feel his cock grow hard beneath me. He grabs my neck as he leans into me.

Before he can deepen the kiss, I gently pull back, breaking the connection. “I forgot to ask you about your day. How was it?”

With my hands cradling his face, I begin to place soft kisses on his cheeks, enjoying the warmth of his skin. He rubs my back, a comforting gesture that makes me feel cherished in this moment. “Fine, Sugar. Just busy,” he chuckles, leaning back against the edge of the tub, the water glistening around us. “How ‘bout you? How was your day?”

“I finished getting everyone’s Christmas gifts today so good, but tiring,” I reply, letting out a soft sigh.

My hands wander down to his chest, tracing the contours of his muscles as I continue. “I feel selfish for adding to your stress today. You should be focused on the Michelin Star, not whatever surprise you’re cooking up for me,” I confess.

He lets out a sigh, scratching his scruff thoughtfully. “Listen here, I don’t give a damn ‘bout that restaurant. I care ‘bout you and Ellie, Sugar. More than anyone or anything else. As long as y’all are okay, everythin’ else can wait.” His gaze locks onto mine, and I feel the weight of his sincerity in that moment—a promise that goes beyond any accolades. His words create an unspoken bond between us, grounding me in the depth of his commitment.

I reach down into the water, and wrap my hand around his cock. “We can still relieve some stress.”

I try to urge him on by fisting his cock and rubbing it through my wet folds. A smirk takes over my face, as I watch his face for a reaction. He looks at me with wide eyes, gripping the sides of the tub.

“Gin,” Joel warns just before I situate the head of him near my opening. In one go, I completely sink down onto his hard member. He groans quietly and I bite my lip, relishing in this feeling. I’m full of him in every place.

I start slowly moving up and down on his length, careful not to splash water up the sides of the tub. Every inch of his cock impacts me in all the right places. “We shouldn’t be doin’ this in here. Your muscles are all tight as it is, Sugar,” he continues worrying.

I curse myself for having such a high sex drive and needing him every hour of every day. Instead of letting my thoughts take over, I kiss him deeply, silencing his warnings. While swirling my hips, he swallows my moans and begins thrusting in me from below.

“I know. But I need you, Joel,” I whisper against his lips.

With a groan, he gives into my pleas and wraps his arms around my waist, pulling my chest closer to his. Joel sets a rhythm, thrusting up into me slowly over and over again. The eye contact is maddening and I can’t help it but shut my eyes at the feeling. He takes full control and I let him, enjoying every bit of this moment.

“Fuck, Imogen. I’m in love with you,” Joel groans when I bite down on his shoulder to avoid moaning too loud. His pubic area runs against my clit in the most delicious way. The building could be burning down around us and I wouldn’t notice.

Joel squeezes me tighter as my back arches into him, and a bit of the water begins to splash over the side of the tub. I tuck my head into his neck, holding on to his shoulders for dear life. “I love you Joel, so so much,” the moaning babble slips from my lips.

Joel picks up the pace of his hips, helping me to move on top of him. His movements sync with mine, and my mouth opens in a silent scream. I feel Joel slide his hand between us, feeling for my clit. It only takes him a second to find it, sending my whole body ablaze. He starts rubbing quick circles, with his mouth occupied by sucking my skin between his teeth. When he kisses and bites at my sweet spot, I nearly see stars. He drives into me, filling me to the brim each and every time.

My impending orgasm begins coiling tightly like a spring. Ringing fills my ears and my heart has surely floated to the outside of my body. “That’s it, Sugar. Let me have it,” Joel grunts out. His words are enough to release the coil of my orgasm. I let out a long strained moan, falling into him. I grasp at his shoulders feeling the euphoria course through me.

“Holy shit, Joel,” I moan as he slowly strokes me through my orgasm. He lets me come down with full control, allowing me to grind on top of him for a while. Then, I come to a stop with him still solid and sheathed inside me.

I need a second to breathe if I’m going to keep being on top. Joel nibbles at the top of my ear, and his hands are everywhere. My legs, my back, and my chest. Before Joel, I wondered what it would be like to make love. Now, I think I’d have to murder him if he tried to leave me.

“I’m real proud of you, Sugar,” Joel gives me words of affirmation and I smile, lifting my head to look at him. There’s still a fuzzy haze around the edge of my eyes, but the center is clear. I have a drop dead gorgeous man all to myself.

“Mind turnin’ around for me so I can keep lookin’ after you?” Joel asks, lightly tapping my thighs underwater. I nod with anticipation because that’s exactly what I need right now. Every bone in my body urges me to make him feel the same pleasure I’m feeling right now.

I steady my hand on Joel’s shoulders, slowly lifting myself up. We both hiss at the loss of contact and I quickly turn until my back is facing him. I slowly sink down in the water on my knees. My hands go to the bottom of the tub so I can poke my ass into the air for him.

“Damn, I wish you could see how beautiful you look,” I hear Joel sigh behind me, his voice filled with a mix of awe and admiration, as if I’ve taken his breath away. The sincerity in his tone sends a warm rush through me, amplifying the flutter in my chest. It’s as if, in that moment, I truly possess his heart—every beat of it belongs to me. His compliment lingers in the air, wrapping around us like a gentle wave, and the way he sees me makes me feel radiant. I can feel a deep connection between us, a shared understanding that transcends words; we own every part of each other, our vulnerabilities and strengths intertwined. The heat rises to my cheeks, and I can’t help but smile, feeling both shy and elated by his words.

The water shifts beneath me, and I feel Joel’s hands on my ass. I jerk slightly when his wet hands make contact with my skin, but relax when he begins rubbing the skin. “Hang on to the edge of the tub, Gin. I don’t want you slippin’.”

Joel spanks me lightly and I whine in response, crawling towards the edge closest to the window. He follows my lead, moving forwards until he’s needled behind me. He uses one knee to nudge my leg wider and suddenly, he’s pushing back into me.

No matter how many times we have sex, being full of Joel all at once never gets old. He snaps his hips forward again and again, showing me what he meant about holding the porcelain beneath my finger tips. My moans reverberate back to me and I don’t recognize the sound coming from my throat. Joel groans in response, gripping my sides deliciously as he picks up the pace. “You’re takin’ me so well,” Joel grunts.

Instead of letting Joel have full control, I begin rocking my hips so we crash together with each trust. With every piston of his hips, I slide forward on my knees causing just the right amount of pain. Joel doesn’t let that stop him though, pulling me back with his strong hands.

It’s simultaneously just the right amount and completely overwhelming. My love for Joel feels suffocating as I grapple with how to express it. “Breathe, Ginny. You ain't breathin’,” he says, his hand gently resting on my neck from behind.

My chest expands as I gasp for air. I hadn’t realized I was holding my breath, but given how much I usually talk, that was likely Joel’s first clue. My clit buzzes a signal up my thighs and I squeeze around his cock again. “Joel, I’m about to-“ my whimpers are cut off by him picking up the pace. How am I supposed to breathe when he’s trying to murder me with his penis?

"Not yet, Sugar. Just breathe. Breathe with me." His voice is gentle, yet his grip on my neck becomes tight. I try to heed his words, concentrating on my breathing, but every part of me feels like I might collapse.

“Please, Joel,” I shamelessly beg Joel, feeling the pleasure built in my stomach. My cunt contracts around him more and I notice his thrusts becoming uneasy as he nears the end with me.

“Now, Sugar, show me how much ya love me and let go,” Joel coos and I can tell he’s enjoying this just as much as I am. I clench around him so tight, I think I’ll hurt him somehow. My fist balls up and I moan a little too loudly as he strokes us through our orgasms.

Joel’s hot cum shoots inside me, filling me to the brim. “I love you. I love you. I love ya, Ginny,” he chants as I milk him for everything he’s got.

Joel slows himself down, rolling into me one last time as he finishes his release. I’m panting, and when I lick my lips, I taste the saltiness of my sweat on my tongue.

My back twists slightly so I can look at Joel. He gazes at me, his eyes filled with a mix of admiration and desire, as if he’s trying to memorize every curve and contour of my body. His hands gently cradle my stomach, his touch both tender and possessive, radiating warmth that sends shivers down my spine.

“House first, baby second,” I say, my voice steady but playful, a warning laced with sincerity. I know the spark in his eyes suggests he might be imagining a future beyond this moment, a future that could include more than just the three of us.

I can feel the weight of his gaze change into a blend of longing and determination. I move away from him before he gets any more ideas, causing him to groan with disappointment when he pulls out. I turn to sit across from him again, and he mirrors me.

I sink down into the tub, with only my head above water. He takes my feet and pulls them into his lap, beginning to massage them again. He works through every knot in my soles. “That was incredible. You’re somethin’ else, ain’t ya?” Joel rasps.

A soft giggle escapes me, and I wonder if I could ever give up this feeling. “Not as amazing as you,” I responded, wondering where that much energy came from when the man works all day.

Suddenly, I remember Willow’s recent proposal. The idea of a cozy haven filled with the scent of fresh coffee and the sound of turning pages is enticing, but my stomach churns at the thought.

“I forgot to tell you Willow asked me to partner with her on a bookstore café,” I admit, my voice laced with uncertainty. “But I’m worried about handling the finances. You and I both know numbers aren’t my strong suit.”

He leans in, his expression all warm and steady. “That’s alright, Sugar,” he begins, calm as a summer breeze. “Me and Willow can handle that. You just focus on the books and the vibe. Y’all’ll create a place folks are gonna love.”

His confidence is comforting, yet I still feel hesitant. “What if it doesn’t work out? What if I fail?”

He drops my foot and moves closer, pulling me into his lap. “You ain’t gonna fail. You’ve given up so much for me; now it’s your turn to chase after what you want. You deserve this, trust me. Just think ‘bout the joy it could bring you,” he reassures me.

As his words sink in, excitement and apprehension swirl within me. But then a troubling thought surfaces, uninvited. “I’ve been worried about her lately,” I say, my voice trembling slightly. “I noticed bruises on her neck today and I’m afraid they came from her boyfriend.”

His expression shifts, concern replacing calm. “What do you mean?” he asks.

“I don’t know for sure, but it didn’t look right. She brushed it off, but…” I trail off, feeling the weight of my worry. “I invited her to Christmas dinner, hoping to create some space between the two. Maybe if she sees how different things can be, she’ll think twice,” I explain.

He tightens his grip around my waist and his brow is furrowed. I can tell he’s holding in every ounce of composure so he doesn’t get out of this tub to go find Josh. “You oughta talk to her. She needs to know she can count on us. And I want you to know, I’d never hurt you. You deserve someone who treats you right, with respect and kindness.”

I nod, his words a balm against my anxiety. “I know. I just don’t want her to go through this alone,” I affirm.

As I meet his reassuring gaze, I feel the urgency of our conversation merge with the potential of my dreams. Maybe, with his support, this could be my chance to pursue not just my goals, but also help my friend.

Once the conversation settles, we finish our bath, the warm water soothing our bodies. As we step out, he wraps a warm, fuzzy towel around me, the fabric enveloping me in comfort. I smile up at him, probably with gratitude shining in my eyes.

After drying off, I slip into a delicate lace slip. My bonnet slides over my curls while Joel changes into a pair of soft boxers. He scoops me up effortlessly, carrying me to the bed. I nestle against him, feeling safe and cherished. “I love you,” he murmurs, pressing a gentle kiss to the top of my head. I smile, warmth spreading through me as I echo his sentiment.

I allow myself to drift to sleep, but I can't help but toss and turn the entire night thinking about Willow's situation. My mind is spinning, formulating an idea so bold, it leaves my palms sweaty. I’m going to get her away from Josh.

I just don’t know how dangerous it might get.

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delreyshit · 4 months ago

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Fulfilling dreams

Summary: After escaping from the city with Joel, things get tense between the two of you when you reveal your big dream, to get pregnant and be a mother. Joel is willing to help you with that, of course.

Note: there is not much to say other than that this is +18. I hope you like it, English is not my first language, so forgive me for any mistakes I have.

Being involved in a lot of trouble for having helped an old man, was not what I expected for my life. I always imagined that being paired with a soldier would make everything easier, within this apocalypse. Clearly, I never thought that by saving someone's life, my man would make sure to throw me into misery for having betrayed him. Since I escaped with Joel's help from the hustle and bustle of the city, my life had become more hectic. He assured me that he would help me find a safe place as a token of his gratitude for saving him from certain death. For 4 weeks we were traveling without resting. The horses and the different types of vehicles with which we moved exhausted us, so when we arrived at an old, but safe town in Wyoming we took refuge in a stable, not far from the central square of the town.

I sighed a little tired as I lit a cigarette near the campfire. "I finally find you, you've been missing all day," Joel spoke behind my back.

"I was taking long walks, that's all. I needed some alone time." He mutated to just nodding. I watched him grab an axe and large pieces of wood, cutting them on the dry ground. "Do you plan to stay and live here, girl? It's beautiful around here." "I'm not sure yet, although it seems to be a quiet place." "Well, if you stay, I hope you won't be bothered by my company." I looked at him confused.

"What do you mean?" "I've been longing for a life like this, in the countryside or anywhere that's far from the city and the problems." I smiled at his confession. After spending so much time together, Joel had placed a clear trust in me.

The bounce of the wood on the earth was heard over our pleasant silence. "Can you believe it?" At any moment humans could disappear. I mean, apart from the fungus that has spread around the world, it's hard to have babies under these circumstances," I mentioned almost melancholy.

"What is that thought about?" Joel asked me, as he moved the wood to keep the fire alive. "I don't know, I always dreamed of having a baby, they are so adorable and... I think I was thrilled to see all those kids playing near the village. I haven't seen a few little ones play happily in a long time." He didn't say anything for a good few seconds, I just watched him approach the bench where I was sitting, settling next to me.

"Babies can be tender, yes... But they are a great burden. I'm surprised that at just 25 years old you dream of being a mother," he murmured in his hoarse voice. "I was supposed to try to have one with my ex. He was willing as long as neither I nor the baby bothered him... Besides, he thought that this was how we were going to save our race" I said with my fingers forming quotation marks. "Was that the guy you lived with, who tried to kill me?" I nodded. "I see, what an idiot," he said with a grimace of displeasure at the memories.

"I guess you won't do any more dirty work, Joel," he shook his head. "That's part of my past," he assured me. The fire was lit, with intensity and affection. Inhale the smoke and then let it come out with pleasure. "Well, maybe..." after all, you save our generation, my dear," he said with a laugh.

"What do you mean?"

"If you want to be a mother so much, maybe we can get a safer place where you can get pregnant and raise your little ones."

"I don't understand," I blurted out, confused.

"It's not difficult to understand."

"No, it's just that, for that I would have to sleep with someone first, and I don't have anyone to do it with. A couple, of course," I mentioned amused, not caring about the words she spat out in front of Joel.

I shuddered as his palm reached my thigh, gently squeezing my pants. His mouth crept up to my ear and then shrewdly said: "You have me, child. You're right, we have to preserve the species... And what better than the two of us to lift it." I remain silent, I don't know if he is teasing me or serious, his face does not show expressions of mockery, but at the same time he remains defiant.

"Stop kidding, Joel. You should have been an actor, I almost believe everything you just said," I answer with a nervous laugh, moving away little by little to maintain a prudent space between us.

"Don't be too alarmed, I'm just playing with you. But if one day you decide to be a mother, here I am... Young lady." He said with a half-smile, too joking for my liking. He got up from his seat and with a soft gasp stretched his back. He looked at me with compassion and stretched out his arm towards me. "It's getting late, I think we should go into the cabin." I held onto his hand as I stood up, his rough palm gripping me firmly but carefully at the same time. I can feel sleep invade me as we walk to the door of the house, I shake my head trying to stay awake until I reach my bedroom.

"Good night, Joel," I shout through the corridors that lead us to our rooms.

"Rest, child," he exclaims from the living room.

The days passed peacefully, Joel and I toured the entire town, visiting pastry shops, bakeries and a couple of other shops. Although there wasn't a great deal of tension or awkwardness between us, I couldn't help but think about what Joel had previously proposed to me. Every time I looked at him, every time he looked at me, I imagined what it would be like to have a baby together. In my head I wondered what traits our little blessing had, maybe his nose or his eyes, even his personality. Joel may be an older man who is even in another stage of life, but does all that really matter, now? I arrived from the market with plastic bags full of fruits and vegetables. I hurriedly dropped them off at the inn, anxious to see Joel.

While I was shopping, I had decided that I would risk talking to him and seeing his true intentions, I needed to get the doubts of what we talked about that night out of my head. I don't know if I was more excited about the small possibility of being pregnant, ok that Joel fucked me until I could be pregnant.

We got drunk in a pleasant kiss, where our tongues danced together and in need of... More. Apparently it was enough for me to remind him how ready he was to make me a baby a few nights ago to light the heat flames in his crotch. We walked blindly to his bedroom, kicking open the door and very nimbly cornered me against the wall, while he locked us in the bedroom. With one of his large hands he held my wrists over my head, the other, he slid between my body, reaching my center dressed. He cupped it firmly, making me moan between his lips.

We separated so we could breathe and a thin layer of saliva held us together like a spider's web.

"I'm going to get you pregnant and you're going to thank me, darling."

"Yes, please," I whispered desperately. He pushed me against the bed as I undressed in a hurry. His fingers got tangled in my jeans and in my panties at the same time. I gasped in surprise as he threw them to my knees.

"Honey..." he murmured with a pleading brow before me. Almost immediately he knelt down and completely removing my garments, his large hands guided my thighs towards him, opening them and massaging the flesh. He wasted no time and with much lust, his tongue traced a whole path in me.

Licking, spitting and masturbating... He tortured me a lot and I liked it. My fingers run through his hair decorated with some gray hair, tightening and pushing him deeper. I keep my eyes closed, enjoying every sensation that runs through my delicate nudity on the cream-colored sheets. Just when I'm a mess of moans and twisted movements, the moment I feel like I'm going to get rid of it he pulled away rudely. Between soft gasps he watched as he stood up and began to undress. He takes off his shirt, belt and pants, leaving him in old boxers, marked by his great erection. I try to sit with the annoying pain between my legs at his sudden absence, my fingers caressing his hips while my nails catch on the worn elastic.

I'm sure of the pride Joel feels when he admires my pale face, my mouth drooping at the proud stiffness that hit his stomach.

"You're the prettiest thing I've seen in a long time, missis," he murmurs as he holds my chin, forcing me to look at him.

"Joel, please."

"Please, what?" "Fuck me," I hummed impatiently. Almost like a primitive movement in his being, he holds me by the shoulders and with great force and speed he lays us both down. I feel his hands hold my lower back up to my butt, massaging it and opening it. He moans as he moves between my legs to line up the red head of his cock at my entrance.

"Treat me with love, please," I whisper against her cheek.

"Of course, beautiful. Now, launder your hips... Do you want to?" he growled against my mouth.

He penetrates me carefully, making me feel every vein that begins to run through my walls.

"Fuck."Exhale."You're so tight."

After a few minutes, their movements become precise and slow, but with strength and consistency.

"You're going to be full of me, sweetness," He moans through clenched teeth. Once again, he retreats and with sweat running down his forehead, he charges vigorously. With a faster rhythm, coming out almost completely from me and then hitting my skin with his heavy balls.

"Every drop, you're going to take it and you're going to be grateful." -Fuck... Joel, I'm going to-"

"Do it, damn it. Lubricate my cock, darling."

My body shudders and my vision is obscured by the tears that run down my face. I cling to Joel's broad back, clawing like a cat as I moan his name, losing control of my orgasm. A sweet warmth brings me back, the huge cords of cum paint me inside, very deeply. A storm of pleasure envelops us, defeating us completely on the mattress. Joel shifts and lies down next to me as I continue to recover from the exquisite feeling he left in me. His burly arms guide me to him, carefully embracing me.

The sun illuminates my face through the thin curtains, when I turn to look for Joel I discover him sitting, admiring my naked silhouette.

"Good morning," He murmured in a voice hoarse with sleep.

"I hope you have energy, my dear. We have no way to make sure you got pregnant last night… You have to keep practicing, at least until your belly grows," He said sensually.

#joel miller #joel tlou #joel x reader #joel the last of us #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller x y/n #joel miller x original character #fanfic #x reader #fem reader #female reader #x you #video games #fanfiction

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cherriready · 2 years ago

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New people in town

Joel Miller x Ex-lover!Reader (She/her), OC!May Miller x Mom!Reader, Tommy Miller x Reader (Platonic af)

Chapter II

Summary: In which a girl discovers how the new man in town — who was accompanied by another teenage girl — and her mother were closely and intimately related once, and how almost two decades after they last saw each other, their reunion could possibly turn their worlds upside down.

New people in town playlist! ✨

Warning: swear words, mentions of death, violence and sex, possible smut in the future, ANGST, etc. Possible spoilers!

A/N: English is not my maternal language, Spanish is, so I will take advantage of that in the future lmao. Also if you see any grammatical error, please let me know!

Tag list: Open! If you wanna be tag let me know, also if by any chance you wanna get removed, also let me know! Ty :)

Feedback is really appreciated! ❤️

2005

She wasn't the least bit used to sleeping next to someone, sharing a bed and such a small space. Even before the outbreak, she was not. Yes, she had occasionally shared a bed with one of her girl or guy friends, but it came always from the most platonic place possible. Whenever she had had sex, it had always been sporadic, with no possibility of sleeping in the same bed with such people.

This time it was different, he was different. And that was a problem. She didn't know if allowing herself to let her guard down in that way was going to benefit her in any way, or the opposite.

For every time you let someone into your life in a cruel world like the one she lived in, it only meant one more loss at some point.

The man she had lying next to her, naked, was not her boyfriend — in fact, he wasn't even her friend — they were partners, strictly. And roommates, occasionally. Still, she let her guard down for once, and so she ended up clinging to the warm, broad back of her partner, who was sleeping on his right side. She rested her forehead against the back of his neck, and as she closed her eyes, she listened to the rain falling outside.

It wasn't until her breathing matched his and she was about to fall asleep that he shifted his position and turned onto his left side, coming face to face with her, who still had her eyes closed, even though she was still pretty much awake.

"Shit." He mumbled in the darkness of the room, seeing her body so close to his. Naked and vulnerable, just like him. He did no more, admiring her briefly and pondering the situation he found himself in, despite the heaviness of his eyelids, he shook and dropped his head back onto the pillow, hiding his face in her hair, after that, he hugged her waist over the old blanket that covered them both.

When their breaths came in rhythm again, she opened her eyes and looked up, noticed his relaxed expression and ventured to stealthily bring her hand to the scar on the right side of his forehead, stroked it gently, lovingly, then moved on to caress the curls at the back of his head.

The rain was now falling harder outside, which caused her to look up to the window of the room, still not moving her head in the slightest. The water was falling heavily and was accompanied by the occasional silver streak of a lightning.

It was as if, in some way, the storm that was raging outside was a reflection of the internal struggle she was having.

Was letting her guard down with him a wise choice? Would it hurt in any way? Was he an exception, perhaps, even though they were still strangers?

Before she could even have an answer to all those questions in her head, she fell into the arms of Morpheus. And for the first time since it all began, she slept with an unfamiliar, warm sense of security, which allowed her to feel some sort peace.

2023

"Be very, very careful, okay, my love?" Said the progenitor whom still continued to see the teen as her baby. "Listen always to-"

"-Your aunt Maria. All the time, yeah, okay? I'll be fine. We won't go far." Said the young woman, named May, as she pulled on her gloves before heading to the horse she was about to ride.

"I will have my eyes on her, all the time. Nothing will happen to her, also I will make sure she learns a thing or two." Maria said as she approached the duo, she was accompanied by her husband, Tommy, and the horse she was gonna rode in. "She is a very sharp and clever girl, I assure you she will be a great addition to the expedition and patrol group."

"Maybe one day I can take charge of leading them, you'll see." Half-joked the curly-haired young woman, giving a glance at all the members of her little family.

"It's only a matter of time, sweetheart." Her uncle said, giving his niece a smile as he patted her shoulder playfully. "While you're gone I'll take care of your dearest mother here."

"Thanks, Uncle Tommy." May said before hugging her uncle tightly.

"You're getting stronger and stronger." The man commented with a tone of surprise as he felt the strong grip the young girl had exercised in that brief embrace.

"That's what happens when you lift more weights than your uncle." The brown-eyed girl scoffed, before glancing at her mother, who was looking at the pair in amusement.

"See you in the afternoon, mama." Said the young girl before hugging her mother. Unlike the hug she had with her uncle, this one lasted a little longer and was gentler.

Before they broke the embrace, Red took her daughter's face and placed a kiss on her forehead. "Enjoy the experience, and you better let me know how it went later." She said, squeezing her daughter's hands affectionately, before letting her go.

"Shall I walk you to the clinic?" Tommy asked, after watching his wife and niece ride off on their respective horses.

"Yeah, let's go, Texas."

Tommy ran a hand through his mustache and looked at his friend, who was walking silently beside him. She wore a small smile on her face, one that reflected melancholy, even regret in a way. The younger Miller put his hand on her shoulder, which caused her to stop and give him a curious look.

"What's on your mind, my friend?"

"It's nothing."

"Red?" the man asked, folding his arms. "Spill it, come on."

"Tommy." She said resting her hands on her hips.

"Reddie." He mimicked her, trying to goad her into talking. "I'm your best friend, you know you can tell me anything. You'll never be judged."

"I'm late for work."

The dark curly-haired man looked at his watch, then at his friend. "It's still 20 minutes before you start your shift at the clinic."

"She looks more like him every day." She said at last. "She’ll be 18 in a few weeks and in a way... I can't stop thinking about him lately. And everything he's missed out on with her, because of me."

"Oh, honey." Tommy sighed before pulling her into his body, and resting one of his hands on her head.

"Because of my fucking selfishness and fear of telling him the truth, May has grown up without her father and Joel doesn't even know he has a daughter."

"Listen to me, okay?" his best friend demanded as he grabbed her face with both hands, causing her to fix her gaze on his. "You made the right decision by leaving Boston and not looking back. Don't get me wrong, I love my big brother dearly, but back then, Joel was a fucking mess and didn't care if he blew up everything in his path after Sarah's death. Joel was only a shell of what he once was."

"Don't you think at least I should-"

"Don't torment yourself with the 'what ifs'. They won't help you at all." Tommy wiped the tears away from his friend's face and gave her a small smile. "Besides, you should be proud of the tremendous good job you've done raising your daughter on your own, on your fucking own, and in this fucking post-apocalyptic world.

"Thanks, Miller." Said the woman, smiling at her daughter's uncle. "You know what I love about May? She smiles when she sleeps, whenever I think about it, I feel so much better. Thinking about making sure she keeps smiling… motivates me to keep going."

"Sarah used to do that too."

"Yeah?" the Nurse asked, her eyes lighting up at the thought of the two sisters sharing one more small gesture. "I wish they'd met."

"Sarah would have adored May. Believe me when I tell you she wouldn't have left your daughter's side no matter what."

2005

"Are you all right?" asked the comforting voice from behind her, soon after she felt a gentle squeeze on her shoulder.

She brought her hand to his and closed her eyes briefly, trying to hold back the tears. She knew Joel wasn't a man who showed his feelings, he wasn't usually physically close to her, except for when they slept together.

She didn't know much about him, or his life before the apocalypse. She for sure knew very basic and trivial things, which you might find out about someone on a first date. But at the same time, even when she didn't know anything about his past, she felt an intimate connection and familiarity with him. She felt safe, secure. He was the only person who conveyed that to her.

"Yes, don't worry." She said, nodding slightly, as she brushed her tears away with her free hand.

He knelt down in front of her and cupped her face with both hands. From where she sat on his couch, she could only stand silently watching him intently. He was covered in grime and dust, probably from all the hard work he had done throughout the day. "Something happened at work."

"That sounds like a statement you're making."

"I know it is." He said with his characteristic tone, rough, but soft somehow. "Has anyone given you trouble?" the man questioned with a frown. She didn't answer. "Should I break someone’s jaw to-"

"-No!"

"Do... you want to talk about it?"

She sniffled and looked up at the ceiling, trying to hold back the tears that again threatened to spill from her eyes. She shook her head vigorously, and gently rested her forehead against his. "Joel... I- You'll see..."

"What's wrong?"

"I know it's just sex between us, and other than that, we're partners and occasionally roommates, but... can I ask you a favour?" the young adult woman asked, showing her weakness.

"I guess, yes."

"Can we — just for tonight, just for once — sleep together, just sleep?" With trepidation she asked. "I know that because of everything you've been through, you keep your distance from people, but I'm asking you… please. Just for one night, can we be friends? You're the closest thing I have to one here."

Joel seemed to think about it, but a few seconds later he nodded slightly, and without a word, rose from the floor and offered a hand to her, who took it. He pulled her to his body, and she collapsed into tears on his chest.

"Shh... easy. I've got you." He planted a kiss on her hairline and with one hand stroked her back. Her breath hitched briefly, but for a few moments she allowed herself to enjoy and savour this unusual little moment with him.

She was so fucked. She was toasted, no doubt about it.

Despite the fact that they were practically, as many would say, perfect strangers, she had fallen in love with him, and she knew that wasn't the fucked up part of the whole situation. The doubly fucked up part was making a decision as to how she was going to let him go.

It shouldn't be that hard, she used to think from time to time. He doesn't feel anything for me, she used to think too.

It should be relatively easy, shouldn't it? To let go of a person who you know doesn't love you back. Who you know doesn't see you as anything more than a partner, who would help him from time to time with some smuggling business or help him to patch up the wounds he got, either from a fight or from the work he did to earn ration cards. Well, that and a person with whom she occasionally fucked — lately much more frequently than before — to relieve his stress, anger, or whatever.

She didn't mind, when she felt the same way she would go to him for exactly the same thing. Only unlike him, at some point along the way, she ended up catching feelings for the guy from Texas.

Holy fuck.

2023

"Hey, mama!" The young woman with curly brown hair said coming through the door. She was almost 18 years old, tall and with slightly tanned skin. She had a beautiful, radiant smile, which made her nose, identical to her mother's, scrunch slightly. But undoubtedly her most distinctive features were her huge chocolate eyes and the freckles that adorned her cheeks and nose — a trait her own mother did not know from whom she had inherited them.

"Honey, what's wrong?" Her mother, no more than 43 years old, replied as she looked at her daughter curiously. "How did your first expedition out of Jackson go? Did you do what we agreed, May?" she asked, arching an eyebrow and crossing her arms, waiting for an answer.

"Always do what Aunt Maria says. Yes, maaaama." The young woman said as she leaned against the kitchen counter, and watched intently as her mother prepared the evening's dinner. "It was quite unexpected what happened today. You see, a man and his daughter, came in asking for Uncle Tommy."

"Maybe an old friend of his. You know, from when he was with the Fireflies." The mother said to her daughter as she opened the oven door, then picked up the big tray she was going to put in the oven.

"No, not exactly, madre. That man was looking for his brother, Uncle Tommy."

CLANK!

Once the tray made contact with the floor, silence reigned in the kitchen for a few seconds. The young girl approached her mother, concern and nervousness flooding her face.

"Mama, are you okay?" the chocolate-eyed girl asked. "Mom, do you know that man? Do you know who he is?" May asked in a whisper, as she stroked her mother's back.

She could only nod awkwardly and slowly, as she was unable to look her daughter in the eyes. She swallowed and went to one of the kitchen stools, where she sat down and hid her face in her hands.

She sighed regretfully, before opening her eyes and pushing her hair behind her ears. "Yes, I know him — knew him. That was a lifetime ago, my love. But that was before you were even born."

"Did he know... my father? Or perhaps he knows what has become of him?"

The woman looked at her daughter, and brought a hand to the stool beside her, inviting her beloved daughter, the thing she loved most in this broken world, to take her place beside her. "May. You should sit down, I think it's time I told you about him. It's time I told you about your real father — Joel Miller."

"Joel Miller? As if Miller like- Uncle Tommy?"

"Yes." Red admitted with a sense of defeat.

"I don't get it, Mom." With confusion reflected on her face the little girl said. "I'm supposed to have adopted my last name from Tommy because I needed one for school?"

"May. You see-"

"You're telling me that Uncle Tommy is, in fact, my uncle not only because of your good relationship, but also because of what he is biologically?" May gripped the kitchen counter tightly, while frowning and still confused, she tried to process the information she was receiving. "When were you going to tell me all this? Or didn't you plan to?"

"I don't know, sweetheart." She answered honestly as she stood up and tried to take her daughter's hand, to try to comfort her.

The teenager pulled her hand away before she could even touch it. She felt betrayed by her own mother. "Please- Don't!" She exclaimed raising her hands in the air in frustration. "Is that the reason he's here looking for Tommy!? Because he knows his brother has practically raised his daughter?"

Red was silent for a few seconds. "No... no that's- No. Besides, that's not possible."

"Ah, so Joel Miller has no interest in meeting own daughter?" the young woman asked sharply, as tears formed in her eyes.

"No, May, that's not it, alright?" sighed the mother as she looked away from her daughter and tried to find a way to tell her the truth.

"Then why?"

"Because he doesn't know he has a daughter."

"I mean, he- He's come all this way and he doesn't even know about me?" May asked, trying to stifle a sob. "Why didn't you tell me all this before?"

"Because I wanted to protect you!"

"From what? Holy shit, mom!" May exploded. She could no longer contain herself.

"From the fucking truth!" Her mother exclaimed in the same way. "That I was a fucking coward. And that because of my fucking decisions Joel hasn't even had a chance to... know about you."

"One thing we agree on then, mother. You're a fucking coward!"

A lump formed in Red's throat. Her breath hitched, her heart skipped a beat and her body began to tremble. Tears blurred her vision and she was unable to watch as her daughter angrily left the scene, which she let her know due to the tremendous slamming of the front door of the house, giving her to understand that she had left the house and left her alone, by herself with her regrets.

2005

“Joel.

Honestly, I don't know why I'm writing you this letter. I don't know if you care enough about me to at least write you an explanation, I guess I'm doing it rather for me. By the time you read this I will be gone. I'll probably be far away, maybe I'll never come back, or maybe I will.

I don't know what will become of me and that terrifies me, but at the same time it motivates me to keep going, to keep fighting. Just like you. Even though I haven't known you for very long, you've made a big impact on me. I know that we are very different, I know that many times we have disagreed on many things and that we have clashed, but even so, when I was not up to the task and I have probably been a hindrance to you, you have protected me and taken care of me — always from a distance, except when we both sought comfort in each other's arms —.

I know the last thing you want is to leave another person in your life. It's understandable, especially in a world like this where that means loss. This is one of the reasons why I'm leaving. To avoid jumping over the walls you have built, so that I can respect your boundaries and prevent you from ending up like me. I don't know at what point it happened, but you managed to jump over all my walls. You've been the only person capable of doing it until now and that terrifies me. I'm terrified of losing you. I'm also terrified of staying in Boston and seeing you letting your guard down with someone else, not being that person. I know it's selfish, but I didn't want to risk living in this broken world with an even more broken heart. It's probably already like that.

It already breaks my heart to leave you behind, without saying goodbye, but I know I will heal. I will find something that gives meaning to my life and I will fight on. I hope, too, that when you're ready, you'll find that reason too.

Try to be happy.

I love you.”

2023

"May! May!" Red exclaimed as she pounded on the door of Tommy and Maria's house. "Anybody home? Maria?" She asked as she took a few steps back and peered into the windows of the house, trying to see if there was movement inside.

She looked around the house and tried to see if there was any sign of the young girl with the curly hair anywhere, but there didn't seem to be any luck. She put her hands to her mouth and tried to warm them. She watched as the snow began to fall again, which caused her to go briefly into a small trance.

She remembered May's first snowfall, in the winter of 2005. She was only a few weeks old and they were both alone on the road, trying to find a safe place to spend the night. May had not stopped crying all day, hungry because she was not producing enough milk, as she had barely found food and water the last few days. The little girl's cries kept her mother alert all the time, waiting for an infected to appear and attack them. She could still remember the terror and paranoia in her bones. It wasn't until the snow began to fall that the newborn girl calmed down, watching the snowflakes fall, so that soon after she fell asleep.

"That May you are looking for is not here.”Said a voice that brought her out of her trance.

She walked back to the front door and there she saw a person she didn't recognise, poking her head out from inside. "You are not Maria.” Said the woman with obviousness.

"No. I'm Ellie." Said the young teenager, looking her up and down.

"You are the kid who was with Joel." Red muttered, looking at her intently. She didn't look like him.

Maybe she looked like her mother?

"Do you know him?" Ellie asked as she opened the door all the way and showed her body.

She nodded. "I used to, a long time ago." She replied rubbing her hands together from the cold. "I imagine you and your father came all the way from Boston. I hope the trip wasn't too hard," Red said sincerely, as she gave the teenager a small smile.

"That old man isn't my dad." Ellie laughed at the witticism of the woman standing a few feet away from her. "But- uhm... thanks?" She replied at what the woman had said to her about the trip there.

Reddie nodded her head and gave Ellie another small smile before setting off to find her daughter.

"Wait!" Ellie said to her from the doorway, causing her to turn and look at her curiously. "Why don't you go inside and wait for Maria? She'll be able to help you."

"Thanks, but I can't." She thanked the girl. "Please, when you see Maria or Tommy, can you tell them that if they see May to tell her that her mother is looking for her and to come home?"

The teen nodded her head. "I will." She whispered, in response.

"Thank you so much, Ellie." May's mother told her before turning back on her heels and heading off to find her daughter. "By the way, welcome to Jackson!" Ellie heard her saying from a little further away.

The young girl smiled to herself and watched as the woman disappeared into the distance, closing the door as she felt a cold breeze, but not before wondering how she knew Joel.

[…]

It had been three, almost four hours since May had left home and her mother had not been able to find her. It was as if she had disappeared from town. She had looked everywhere; at her friends' house, at Tommy and Maria's house twice, in the main hall of the village, in the stables... nothing!

She walked silently down the empty main street, not a soul was there. Everyone was gathered around the main hall watching that film of which she couldn't remember the name. Now it was colder than before, the sun had set a while ago and the snow was still falling, although now with less force.

She stopped to look at the Christmas tree and thought of her family, of all those she had lost. She smiled sadly as she wished things were different and that she could be held by her loved ones once more. She wished that the Outbreak had never happened, that nothing was the way it was.

No! Not that!

She shook her head, trying to shake off the thought. Yes, there were things she missed from her life 20 years ago, and there were certainly things she wished she hadn't lived since then. But May? May was a blessing and the best thing that had ever happened to her in her entire earthly existence. She was grateful to have her, and therefore thanked any deity or cosmic force for having put the Miller brothers in her path.

She resumed her walk once again, leaving the Christmas tree behind her. Hopefully her daughter would be there by now and they could talk about everything at length. At the thought, her stomach sank with nerves. But she ignored it.

May deserved to know the truth, she deserved to know everything.

As she was so wrapped up in her own thoughts, she didn't see that silhouette appear from the side and practically jump out at her, causing her to fall to the snowy ground surprised. But when she heard her daughter's laughter, a huge sense of relief washed over her.

She clung in a hug to her daughter's body, which was lying on top of hers, and then, she too burst out laughing. She looked to her side once her daughter lay on the floor beside her. She sighed and watched intently as the young woman, who was undoubtedly the spitting image of her one-time lover, gazed raptly at the night sky and lights around her.

"I'm so sorry, Mama. For how I behaved with you before." Said the young woman, a mist adorned the words that left her lips.

"I'm sorry too, baby girl. For not telling you the truth before." She apologised too, as she sat down on the floor.

Her daughter mimicked her and sat down as well, took her mother's cold hand in hers and rubbed it gently. "I want to know everything. No more half-truths, okay?"

"Okay." Reddie said as she brushed an unruly curl away from her daughter's face, tucking it behind her ear. She stroked her cheek with her free hand and gave her a small smile. "Fancy a hot chocolate in front of the fireplace... while I tell you all?"

"Sounds great!" May said as she stood up from the floor and offered a hand to her to make it easier for her to get up. "Now get up, you're freezing. You'll catch a cold."

The mother flinched at the almost adult woman's comment. "Since when do you behave as if you were my mother?"

"Since I'm the one who has to pick you up off the floor like you are a little girl?" the young Miller laughed.

"Ha! I love you, too, you nightmare child." Red said carelessly, shaking off the snow on her legs. She looked at her daughter who was suddenly silent. "May?" she asked, noticing that the girl was staring at a spot behind her.

"Mama..." the young girl whispered, looking at her with an expression she couldn't quite make out, only to turn her attention back to what she had previously been staring at, causing her mother to turn and look in that direction as well.

And there he was.

The man she had loved for all those years and had to leave behind. This time he was different from the last time she saw him, obviously, time had passed for him too. His gorgeous curly hair had gone grayer, and so did his beard. But without a doubt he still had almost the same physical constitution as he had had almost 20 years ago.

He was still just as undeniably handsome, though.

"Joel..." she let out in a whisper, which she doubted he would ever hear.

The man looked at her with surprise, as if he had seen a ghost, in a way. He certainly hadn't expected that after all those years he would see her again, let alone there.

Not after convincing himself that he would never see her again.

He looked at her carefully, hoping to somehow rule out that what he was seeing, not far from him, wasn't some kind of trick his mind was playing on him. Then his gaze shifted to the young teenager, who, stunned by the scene before her, shifted her gaze from her mother to the man she had discovered a few hours ago to be her father, repeatedly.

Red took May's hand and the young girl squeezed it, looked down at their hands and then back up at Joel, who was still looking at them. The adult woman bit her lower lip and tried to articulate a word, but was unable to.

Then it was when she saw it in his gaze, which changed from surprise to realization, that something had clicked in his head. It was as if he had found the last missing piece in the puzzle he had been unable to solve all that time.

And what to say. No words were needed. It was in the soft sound of the winter night, in the gentle, cold breeze, that the truth came out.

That truth he had been unaware of, until that precious moment.

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itsoutrageouss · 11 months ago

Text

LIKE A BELLFLOWER

A Joel Miller x fem!oc fanfiction.

Go here to be part of the story taglist

✿✿✿

There are three rules when Joel lets her trail him after an incident with her old and horrible crew,: Stay silent, follow him, and leave him alone as soon as she finds somewhere else to be. But for the first time since Belle was left to fend for herself she feels safe. And Joel sees that she is soft. Soft and delicate like a bellflower, like nothing else in this ruined, apocalyptic world.

✿✿✿

1. A stoic rescue

2. No ammo, no sleep

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ryuzakemo128 · 5 months ago

Text

Cara Mia (My Beloved)

Pairing: Billionaire! Joel Miller x Alessia Romano (Joel Miller x F! OC)

Content Warning: Cussing, Angst, no outbreak, post break-up, age gap (Joel is 55-56. Alessia is 28 turning 29), Jealous Joel.

Indirect Character Mention: F! Reader Supermodel(21yrs)

Words: 1021

Summary:

Masterlist Dividers

Note: Mood board is for Alessia Romano. Alessia Romano is an OC. Not a canon character. Sneak peek of Upcoming One-shot with bonus mood board.

Alessia had decided to start up an onlyfans ever since he broke up with her, she needed the extra cash. It was one of the few ways she could earn it without the extra leg work. She spent that entire week getting ready for it, setting up her profile, taking photos and videos, and planning her content.

He broke up with her to go out with a young supermodel. She said go ahead and do it. Just don’t be shocked when I move on from you to someone else better than you.

Was it petty of her to add those last few words? Yes.

Did she care how it impacted him? Fuck no.

Why should she care about him after she ‘set him free’?

Joel decided the best course of action after she disappeared for a week was to yell at her, who remained passed out in her lime green hammock.

“Where the hell have you been?” he roared, the rage boiling within him mixing with the worry that had consumed him during her absence.

“Well. You said fuck off, right?” Alessia answered, causing him to grit his teeth even harder.

She took it literal as possible and fucked off, right after he told her to.

She didn't have a couch in her living room, but she did have a lime green hammock. Not only that, but she must have passed out on it after passing out after four cocktails at the bar.

The television still had The Simpsons playing, the DVDs on her coffee table against the red brick wall, the black curtains shut tight blocking the sun from taking a peek inside.

“You're drunk,” Joel stated, the disbelief in his voice palpable.

“Hungover, it means I was drunk 𝓎𝑒𝓈𝓉𝑒𝓇𝒹𝒶𝓎” she corrected him with a smirk, though her voice was groggy, her eyes were still half-closed.

Joel's eyes narrowed as he stepped closer to her, the wooden floorboards creaking under his weight. He grabbed the edge of the hammock, giving it a rough shake. “Do you have any idea what I've been through the past week?”

“Hey, you were the one who wanted to break up. Don't come walking over to my place because you saw me talking to another guy.” Alessia retorted. “What's the matter, your 21-year-old supermodel girlfriend not good enough for you?”

Alessia groaned as she got up to shove her pyjama top on, a men's graphic t-shirt with marvel heroes plastered over the front of it. The same one she wears to bed most nights. She didn't bother putting her pyjama bottoms back on as she walked into her small, tiny, kitchenette, taking out the leftover pizza from last night to have for breakfast.

“What's your problem?” Joel followed her, the anger still resonating in his voice.

Alessia ignored him to warm up her pizza, getting her leftover soft drink from the fridge and Joel continued to speak, “You're not even sorry? Do you know how worried I was? I called everyone, I looked everywhere!”

“Why the fuck do you care?” She snapped back at him. “You have everything you want. Leave me the fuck alone.”

“I care because you're still important to me, whether you like it or not,” Joel said, his voice cracking.

He slammed his fist on the kitchen counter, making the plates rattle. “I thought something had happened to you. I can't just turn that off because you decided to ghost me after I made a mistake!”

Joel had been told that Alessia started an onlyfans that week, she didn't know how he found or who told him about it. Was it Thomas? Did he tell him? Was it Ellie? Did she do it to spite her? Was it his new girlfriend that told him about it? Who told him? Why did they tell him about it? What did they have to gain from telling him what she was doing now?

Joel spoke up again, much to her dismay, “What's with the onlyfans bullshit, huh? Did you do that to get back at me?”

“No, I did it because I needed the money, and it’s my body, Joel. I can do what I want with it. If it’s not with you, then it’s with someone else. I’m sorry if that bruises your little man ego, but that’s not my problem anymore. You chose the supermodel over me, remember?”

Joel’s jaw tightened as he watched her take a bite of the pizza, the cheese stretching out in a long string. “So, you’re just going to whore yourself out because I made a mistake? That’s your solution?”

“Did I hurt your small feelings? ”Alessia sarcastically remarked. “Did I bruise that pathetic small ego of yours? I have a date this evening, so you better shove off before I call security on your dumb ass.”

A date? Joel was caught off guard by her nonchalant announcement. “You're seeing someone else already?” he asked, his voice laced with both anger and hurt.

“A great guy from where I grew up in Italy.” Alessia answered.

Joel felt a pang of jealousy stab through his chest. “Italy? How long have you been seeing him?”

“He's the guy that helps me with my onlyfans content.” Alessia answered indirectly.

This revelation hit Joel like a ton of bricks. The rage that had been simmering inside him began to boil over. He couldn't believe that not only had she moved on, but she was also flaunting it in his face.

He stepped closer to her, his eyes burning with fury. “You're going to let some stranger film you? After everything we've been through?”

“He is most definitely not the guy filming.” Alessia implied he was the guy acting in said onlyfans content with a smirk on her face, which only added more fuel to Joel's rage.

“You're fucking him?” Joel's voice grew louder, his face contorted into a mask of rage.

“Why do you care?” Alessia walked to her bedroom to get her outfit ready for that evening. “I'm finally moving on. You should be happy for me.” Alessia walked into her closet looking through her black dresses to wear that night.

She finally settled on her A-line black dress with leg slit, batwing sleeves, and bat hem line. She had bought it from a designer store for this exact purpose.

“You don't get it, do you?” Joel followed her, his voice filled with a mix of anger and desperation. “You're not just anyone to me, Alessia. You can't just replace me with some random guy from your past!”

“Watch me.”

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joelswritingmistress · 5 months ago

Text

Neighbors with Benefits: Part 2 (Joel Miller x f! Reader)

Part of the #hotdilfsummerchallenge put on by @hellishjoel 🙏 Thanks again for this overabundance of Dilfy Pedro content & promotion 🥵

Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader

Word Count: Roughly 4000

Warning: Dilfy Smut/ Age Gap (23 & 42)

“(Y/N), do you want some money for pizza?" The voice sounded like a distant echo. "(Y/N)... (Y/N)?"

You finally snapped out of a daydream and turned to your mother in the kitchen from the sink where you aimlessly washed dishes. "Huh?"

"Do you want some money to order a pizza or are you going to have something here?" Your mother waited for a response that was taking you an extra long time to give.

"Oh." You cleared your throat and looked at the soapy bowl in your hands, "No... no I'll eat something here."

"Are you sure?"

You nodded. "Yeah there's... soup and stuff."

"Soup?" Your mother asked, "It’s eighty-eighty degrees outside.”

You shrugged. "I had a turkey sub for a late lunch. I'm fine." You managed a smile, "What time will you and Dad be back?"

"Well the banquet starts at seven." She eyed the ceiling as she thought, "I can't see us being out much past ten."

Your father wandered down the stairs straightening his tie that completed a black suit, "How do I look?"

"Dapper dear."

You laughed, "Dapper? Is that still a word?"

"Hey if selfie is a word," your father contested, "Then, yes, dapper is a word. And I'll take it." He kissed your mother on the cheek, "Are we ready to go?"

"Just about." Jennifer glanced at you again.

"I'll be fine." You shoo'd them with your hand, "You guys look great."

Tim reached into his wallet and handed his daughter a twenty. "Just take it," he ordered with a grin when you began to refuse. “In case you change your mind about the pizza.”

"Fine." You smiled and tucked it into your jeans and then kissed them each on the cheek. "Have fun."

The two of them waved and then headed toward the front door, locking it behind them and heading off for the evening.

You continued with the dishes, unable to put the events of the night before out of your mind. You knew you had officially crossed a line - a big line. You had had one of the hottest moments of your life the night before with your much-older neighbor. All day you had kept an eye out for Joel. Once you'd seen him outside watering flowers in the front of the house and another time washing his car. With your parents quite literally over your shoulder it proved to be harder to pursue his offers than you would have thought.

All the more reason to have my own place, you thought.

You turned off the faucet and dried your hands before making your way up into your bedroom. You had begun to feel like a stalker, staking out Joel's every move and looking for some opportunity or excuse to go over there to see him.

"Where ya headed?" Joel's voice filtered in through the open window in your room and you rushed to the window to listen.

You swallowed hard, watching as he sat on a rider lawn mower shouting to your parents who hadn't yet left the driveway.

"Retirement dinner!" Your father shouted, "Open bar!"

"Even better." Joel put his hands out to the sides and gave a wave. "Enjoy!"

You took a breath and saw him kick the mower back into gear before continuing on down the yard. You couldn't take your eyes off of him and only did to watch your parents' vehicle vacate the premises with a friendly double-beep of the horn as they headed a few towns away to a fancy dinner for a friend.

Do I go over there? you wondered. Will I look too desperate? Your heart raced and all of a sudden you felt like you were in high school again - waiting for your parents to leave so you could talk to some guy you were crushing on. Not just some guy, you knew. He was more than you had bargained for in the best of ways.

With a deep breath you took a glance at yourself and changed from the plain, pink t-shirt into a fresh cami from the closet before reapplying some deodorant and giving a spritz from her best Victoria's Secret body spray collection.

I'll just go grab a beer and sit outside, you decided with a nod before ripping the hair-tie from your hair and letting it fall in a naturally messy fashion around your face.

You darted down the steps, reached for a bottle of Bud Lite and headed out the back door to sit on the steps. Your heart was pounding now and flashes of memories from the night before continued to rattle your brain, sending electric currents to every part of your body. You didn't want the encounter to be a one-time ordeal and so when you saw him casually ride up and down in the next yard over you couldn't help but stare.

He's busy. You didn't know if you meant what you were thinking or if you were just scared to go over there and talk to him.

Each second felt like a minute; each minute like an hour. You adjusted from sitting to standing, to sitting again and then decided to pretend to check the mailbox, though you couldn't have cared less if there was mail or not. All you wanted was for Joel to notice you.

Like before, your heart thudded with each step as you crossed the yard and rounded the house that was adjacent to Joel's. His back was to you, and for that you cursed to yourself but you continued the walk toward the driveway, glancing out of the corner of your eye as he put the mower in reverse and turned to face your direction. As your feet waltzed over the pavement you saw him glance over, letting his stare linger as you paced the length of driveway before reaching the mailbox.

You swallowed hard, noting there was nothing to retrieve and then took a deep breath as you prepared your walk back. Again, Joel’s back was to you and he continued what he was doing, mowing perfectly straight rows up and down the lawn.

You sighed, noting it was only halfway done and the impatience that radiated out of you began to drive you mad. Still, next door Joel didn't falter. He carried on with a sense of patience and control that it almost made you feel crazy.

He doesn't seem to be in any rush, why should I?

You sipped your beer again and then reluctantly went in the house when Joel disappeared around the opposite side of his. You scrunched your nose and turned on the television to try to pass some time, though you opened up the living room windows so you could hear the hum of the lawnmower.

You actively felt yourself growing weaker as you relived the moment in the bathroom yet again - his face a few inches from yours while his fingers explored your most sensitive areas. You imagined his inability to control himself in the midst of his climax that left him cursing and moaning with no regard for anything but the way you were making him feel. And his eyes; his eyes burned into your soul and made you submit to him in ways that no other man had. Never in your life had you been enamored so quickly or fallen so hard and fast for someone. It was all brand new and exciting.

It's driving me crazy!

When the lawnmower went off you muted the television and listened, wanting to burst out the front door and run over next door. You knew you couldn't do that - not if you wanted to look like you could handle the passion that was brewing between you and Joel. He wouldn't tolerate some clingy little girl. You knew he needed a woman - a hot, young woman to satisfy him.

You tapped your foot and bit down on your fingernails until they were as short as they could possibly go. As the world grew darker your hopes began to fade. Truthfully, you didn't know if you had the balls to go over and knock on the door of his house. Though, without warning, fate finally appeared to be on your side.

A light knock at the back door made you freeze. Your body went numb and you swallowed hard, able to hear the beating of your own heart. On a second knock, you sprung to your feet and began to rush through the living room. The closer you got, the slower you moved in an attempt to look like you had your shit together. You didn't - not even a little bit. Still, you were addicted to the feeling and the suspense that went along with your short bout of time knowing Joel. If it was anyone else at the back door you knew you might lose it, and so when you flung it open and he stood there still in his yard clothes, you couldn't help but smile as excitement and relief filtered through your body.

"Hi." You smiled at him.

"Hi." Joel's voice cut straight through you. A familiar tantalizing chill ran down your spine.

You stepped aside and held the door, prompting him to slowly ease himself inside. As if it was already a habit he removed his work boots and closed the door behind him, leaving them on a mat so as not to make a mess. The action made you grin and you glanced up at him.

"You, uh... you cool with the shit that went down last night?" Joel asked, leaning against the counter in the kitchen.

You nodded. "Yeah."

"You sure?" The human lie-detector in him studied your features more intently now though he could tell from the smirk you were fighting off, your big excited eyes and the reddening flush in your face that you were being truthful.

"Yeah, I'm sure." You nodded and Joel looked around for a moment. "My parents are... gone."

"Until when?"

"Ten."

His eyes landed on a clock that read seven-thirty-six and then he returned his gaze to meet yours. "The mail doesn't come on Sundays."

"What?" you looked at him, "Yeah, I know..."Your voice trailed off and you felt your face grow a shade darker again.

Joel began to chuckle, "I was sure you did."

You shook your head and sighed, putting your hands on your hips for a moment before casting them out to the sides. He had seen right through your little stroll up the driveway.

"You could've just come over ya know." He gave a closed-mouth smile accompanied by playful eyes.

"I didn't want to bother you when you were mowing the lawn."

Joel smiled, "I was just fuckin’ killing time.. waiting around.. hoping you’d bring by some butter.”

"You were?" You smiled a little wider, pleased to know that you weren’t the only one who felt the anxiety that went along with the cat-and-mouse game you were actively involved in.

"My dick's been hard half the day thinking of last night. Took some serious will power not to fuckin' take care of it myself."

Fuck. What a visual that was.

You giggled but felt that familiar flush in your cheeks again as you leaned back against the counter across from him. Joel grinned when you began to twirl the blinds closed in front of the kitchen window.

For a moment he stared across the room, taking every part of you in from where he stood and eyed each twirl of your fingers around the blinds. When you moved to the next window to assure your privacy, he stalked quietly, waiting for you to begin to close the blinds on the second window before moving in behind to wrap an arm around your midsection.

You felt it again - the electricity. His touch shot currents through your body like you had never experienced. Your eyes closed as he kissed your neck; you whimpered as his fingers carefully undid the button of your jeans. He teased you by letting them dance just an inch or two below your waistline.

Joel reached for your hand, placing it on the front of his jeans and began to nibble on your earlobe. You bit your bottom lip when you felt his hard-on through his pants. "This is what you fuckin' do to me," he whispered.

"Mmm..." you moaned, keeping your eyes closed, "You already know what you do to me,” you told him, pushing his hand farther down your pants so he could feel the dampness that had lingered there since seeing him out on the lawn mower.

He moaned against you, pushing his erection against you from behind and continued to ravage your ear. "I've been dreaming of what you feel like all day." Joel continued to whisper, becoming more aroused by the second.

"God..." you pressed your eyes shut, your arousal spiking now from his words. When you felt his hands sweep down over the thin straps of your cami, you slunk your arms out of it, allowing him the access to grasp both of your breasts from behind. His hot breaths continued to land on your neck. When you heard him undo his zipper you almost couldn't take it. You sighed out loud and reciprocated his advances when he bent you over in front of the back door so your hands were pressed firmly against it.

Joel dropped his pants, stepping out of them with ease and removed himself from the black boxer-briefs he was left standing in. With a swift move he fingered your underwear to the side and positioned himself so at your entrance.The anticipation was almost too much.

You bit your bottom lip and closed your eyes as you waited those long couple of seconds until finally feeling him for the first time. Inch by inch he eased in.When Joel pushed fully inside of you, you moaned

“Ughh…”. His deep, desperate breaths from behind made you feel weaker in the knees, though when his big, strong hands clamped down on the outsides of your hips and he started thrusting you were taken to a whole new level of pleasure.

"Fuck..." You were barely able to get the word out as he wasted no time, pumping hard and relentlessly into you; though when he didn’t stop you couldn’t contain yourself. “Oh..my..God.” You couldn’t hold it in.

Joel closed his eyes, switching his hands from your hips to her shoulders. He tried to remain in control of the feeling, but everything about you got the best of him. The way your back was arched; the way his name echoed off the kitchen walls as you moaned uncontrollably. You couldn’t help it.

As a man who often prided himself on control, Joel was the one who was overwhelmed with a desire so intense that he felt like he could come already at any second. It was why he was forced to pull out, replacing his dick with fingers so he could continue to pleasure you.

“Joel.” You whined his name and your fingers curled against the door, widening your feet again to assure he could do whatever he wanted. Your head dropped and your midsection went weak. “Fuck.” When he removed his fingers this time he pulled you back to him, spinning your around to face him and then crashed his lips against yours.

Joel's tongue dominated you and you wrapped your arms around him. Both of you moaned together as you took a breath in the kiss before he picked you up by the backs of your legs and set you down on the kitchen counter so you faced him. For another few seconds you continued to make out fiercely until he finally reconnected himself to you again at the edge of the marble.

You met his half-open eyes as he proceed to fuck you raw. You wrapped an arm around his shoulders and left the other pressed firmly into the counter with your calves digging into the backs of his legs. He appeared as if he was barely hanging on, though everything he was doing was effectively leading you toward an orgasm.

Your eyes closed now and your fingers dug into the back of his shoulders. You tightened your legs around him and whimpered. It left your thighs aching; your stomach taut. The strength of what was building was mind-blowing, and you begged him not to stop as you let yourself go, releasing a moan you didn’t know you had in you. It was primal and raw, accompanying a burst of pleasure that pulsed with such ferocity that Joel groaned from the recognition of your climatic moment.

"Holy fuck..” He barely got the second word out and gripped your hips harder before releasing inside of you, complimenting your orgasm with a powerful one of his own. Joel let out a guttural moan and had trouble catching his breath as the feeling lingered. Joel kissed you hard as he finished completely, leaving an ache on your lips as he breathed his final breaths into your mouth.

You held onto him hard. Sweat coated his heaving back beneath your palms as he breathed heavily and rested his forehead against yours, now dormant inside of you.

"Fuck," he whispered against your lips and pulled your hips closer to his, thrusting slowly into you once more as if to assure you had gotten every single drop from him.

"Mmm..." you hummed a moan, keeping your arms slung loosely around him. In that moment, you knew you could easily get in too deep, too fast.

When his lips lazily danced against yours again you felt the same electricity as when he'd first entered the house. Your new mission was not to fall in love.

"Any of them college boys ever fuck you like that?" Joel whispered, half-smirking with heavy, satisfied eyes. He hummed another quiet moan and nibbled sensually on your earlobe.

Your senses hadn't quite turned to normal and your face glowed a shade darker. You breathed out the word, “No.”

Joel pecked your lips a few more times in a row before finally separating himself from you.

All of it still felt a bit surreal. For the first time ever you didn't have a care in the world for what kind of consequences could stem from your actions. Joel didn't take his eyes off of you. The lazy post-coital gleam in his eye was unmistakable and you finally chuckled when he failed to look away from here.

"What?" you tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

Joel's face twisted into a mischievous smirk. "Let me see your phone." He kissed you once more before pushing back off the counter to retrieve his pants from the floor.

"My phone?"

"Yeah," he chuckled, "Your phone." Joel began to get dressed and you slowly slunk off the countertop, feeling a heaviness in your thighs.

You glanced around the kitchen, not wholly aware of where you'd left it and then reached a few feet away across the counter when it finally caught your eye.

Joel waited patiently, still smirking to himself. "Punch the code in, honey."

You did as he asked and were tempted to ask what he was doing, but ultimately decided you had nothing to hide and slipped the phone into his waiting palm.

"What the hell was that friend of yours name from the bar last night?" He asked.

You pressed her eyebrows together, a small bout of jealousy filling your body. "Holly. Why?"

Joel kept his eyes on the small screen in front of him, letting his tongue dance over his lips in amusement as his thumbs began to type away at the screen.

The anxious butterflies returned to your stomach and you were dying to know what he was writing.

Joel continued to smirk, almost laughing to himself, and then a noise went off that indicated he'd successfully sent a text message. "Here." He tossed the phone back and sat down at a chair at the kitchen table, crossing one foot over the other, waiting in anticipation as you read what he'd written.

Your eyes scanned the screen and you couldn't contain a wide grin when you saw that he had texted her parents claiming you were spending the night at Holly's house.

When your eyes lifted to meet his, Joel maintained a smile and waited for what you would say.

You decide to tease him. "I'm not staying at Holly's house tonight."

"I know." He nodded matter-of-factly.

You snickered, knowing what he was getting at. "What about my car? My parents will see it in the garage."

Joel waved a hand again, requesting the phone back.

You handed it over, smiling as he sent another message before tossing it back to you again.

"Holly is on her way to pick me up," you read aloud.

Joel cleared his throat and then rested his hands behind his head. Before either of you could say anything more your phone went off and he chuckled, prompting you to put your finger to your lips over an ear-to-ear grin.

"Now, I thought you were an adult and could do whatever the fuck you wanted." He winked and you fought back a laugh as you answered the phone.

"Hi Mom." You made eye contact with Joel who you knew was gaining far too much amusement from the situation. "Yeah I'll text you when we get to her house... no we're not going out drinking." You paused, “Yeah I'll get us some pizza with the money." Another pause. "Okay, goodnight."

When you hung up the phone you eyed Joel again who appeared more than satisfied about the situation. "How will I get back over here without being noticed?"

“I've put all the pieces of this plan into motion,” he reminded you, “Time for you to be creative." Joel slipped his boots back on. "I'm going to shower," he informed you.

“Okay.” You reached down for your jeans, still standing next-to-naked in the center of the kitchen.

Joel made his way back to you, resting his fingers beneath your chin and tapping just under your lips with his thumb. He then leaned down and gave you a chaste kiss. "Pack a bag. I'll leave my back door unlocked."

CLICK HERE FOR PART 3

@pedropascal111 @axshadows @smolbeanzzz

400 notes · View notes

sinful-mind-joyful-thoughts · 10 months ago

Text

𝐀 𝐑𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐖𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐓𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐧𝐬

*vision bored doesn't describe readers' looks it describes the vibes of the story*

Pairing: dark!stalker!Joel Miller x fem!reader

Summary: Life takes a sinister turn once you begin renovations on your old, eerie house. Strange occurrences start piling up—like missing security camera footage and mysterious messages from an unknown stalker. The tension really amps up when you stumble upon red roses, serving as a chilling reminder of the stalker's presence and danger. Despite trying to brush off the threats, the situation escalates when the stalker directly reaches out to you, leaving you fearing for your life and bracing for a potential confrontation.

IMPORTANT: This fic is based on haunting/hunting Adeline i do not claim or own any characters from the series I only used it as inspiration, all the credit to H.D Carlton for being an amazing inspiration and writer.

Warnings/tags: MDNI 18+, DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT, stalking, breaking and entering, bondage (rope and tape), groping, grinding, fear, non/dub-con, rope burns, toxic people, degradation, praise, feet kink? (maybe kind of), pussy eating, fingering, spit, biting, clit biting, breeding kink, kissing, protected sex wrap it before you tap it, kids. THIS IS A WORK OF FICTION, YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR THE CONTENT YOU CONSUME

WC: 6.5k

Small things, it all started small. Ever since renovations started on the house, life has gotten strange. The old dark house didn't help much, but it was cheap to buy such a run-down place when you originally got it. It's worth more now that you've fixed up parts of it, but you still feel like it's dark once those cobweb-covered walls are watching you like you're something to be hunted, or like you're in a horror movie and aren't noticing the obvious hints of a killer.

And you weren't entirely sure you weren't avoiding a killer with how many small changes you saw around the house. Glasses were left on the counter, seemingly freshly poured, even if you didn't remember pouring any. Your nice scotch bottle had less fluid in it every time you checked it, yet whenever you wanted to check the cameras your friend Daphne suggested you put up for your safety, there was missing footage from certain hours of the day even during the night, whatever or whoever was doing these things was smart and calculated with every move. You don't even feel safe showering, Over a month of weird stuff, no face no answers just fear

The more you tried to be rational about how you couldn't have a stalker, the weirder things got. Like he wanted you to know he was there. You started picking up on little changes, the stuff you initially brushed off as maybe just your mind playing tricks on you. But then it became crystal clear when you kept finding those red roses laid out for you, no thorns in sight. Every time a red rose without thorns appeared, it felt sinister. You'd thought how considerate it was of the stalker to avoid using the thorns, but it felt more like a taunt like the person responsible wanted to remind you of their presence with every rose and to show you that they could easily hurt you, but chose not to.

Tonight wasn't any different. You came home from some grocery shopping to see three red roses sitting on your kitchen counter, trimmed and tied together. You groaned and put down the bags of groceries before tossing the roses completely, trying not to pay it any mind. You'd done that the past five times, hoping giving him no attention would make him go away. Your phone buzzed, interrupting your unpacking. You read the text message, and a chill ran down your spine when you realized it was from an unknown number.

Unknown: Do you not like roses?

You saw the message and dropped your phone, immediately scrambling to find something to defend yourself with. You ran to the knife block, grabbing a large, semi-sharp knife. You could worry about the melting ice cream tomorrow, not when your life was at stake. A stalker's murder attempt was imminent, and you weren't going down without a fight. Your phone buzzed again, indicating a new message from your stalker. Your muscles tensed as you carefully picked up your phone to check the message, feeling a sense of dread wash over you when you read it.

Unknown: I see you're taking precautions. But trust me, violence won't solve anything. Let's have a civilized conversation, shall we?

The audacity of the message sent shivers down your spine. How could this person be so calm, so composed, while installing such terror in your life? The thought of engaging in conversation with them made your skin crawl, but you knew ignoring them wasn't an option either.

You took a deep breath, trying to gather your courage. You replied with the knife still in hand, determined to stand your ground.

You: I don't want to talk. Leave me alone.

The response was almost immediate.

Unknown: Ignoring won't make me disappear. You can't escape me.

Your heart pounded in your chest, and the gravity of the situation intensified. The stalker's persistence was chilling, and you knew you needed to involve the authorities. As you dialed 911, another message flashed on your screen.

Unknown: Calling for help? It won't make a difference. I'm always one step ahead.

Fear tightened its grip on you, but you continued with the call, silently praying that law enforcement could indeed intervene in this sinister game. As you spoke with the emergency operator, your stalker's messages continued to flood in.

Unknown: You can't hide forever. I'll be watching, waiting.

Each message felt like a dagger, cutting through your sense of security. The operator assured you that help was on the way, but that didn't stop the ominous texts.

Unknown: The sirens won't save you.

The final message came through, short and ominous, making you block the number.

Unknown: Tick-tock.

You waited almost the whole night, but no one came. The silence was deafening, making you doubt that your stalker would make a move on you. Perhaps your fear has gotten the better of you, making you panic unnecessarily. Either way, you couldn't shake the feeling that danger was just around the corner, leaving you a bit on edge.

As days turned into weeks, the quiet dragged on, and you started second-guessing yourself. The fear kind of faded, replaced by this sort of 'what now?' feeling. A whole week passed, and you didn't spot a single red rose anywhere. The absence of any signs from your stalker had lulled you into a false sense of security, the fear becoming a distant memory. The red roses that once haunted your thoughts had blurred into the background, and life had cautiously resumed a semblance of normalcy.

Just when you thought the nightmare had ended, he resurfaced. On an ordinary day, as you hesitated at the threshold of your home, a cold shiver ran down your spine and you saw something on the ground. You squinted at it for a moment before realizing what it was; a few red roses, perfectly trimmed and tied together with string. Your phone buzzed. You gasped, your heart racing as you realized that the rose had to be from your stalker.

Unknown: "A week is a long time to go without hearing from me, don't you think?”

Your fear grew as you considered possible reasons for your stalker's sudden absence. They'd been relentless with the red roses until now, constantly reminding you of their presence through the ominous messages tied to them. So why would they wait an entire week before finally breaking the silence? Was it a psychological game meant to make you believe you were safe long enough to let your guard down? Perhaps they'd been watching your house, waiting for a good opportunity to strike. Your mind was reeling with possibilities, yet the uncertainty only added to your mounting anxiety.

You quickly walked inside the house and blocked that number as well, not bothering to bring in the roses. You left them on your doormat to rot, as you had no desire to let the flowers remain in your home. Soon after, you heard a buzzing sound coming from your phone and instinctively answered.

"Hello," you said, hoping to hear a familiar voice on the other end. There was no reply for a second. Then suddenly, a deep, gravelly voice infused with a Southern twang unexpectedly responded, sending shivers down your spine. You froze for a moment, pondering the uncanny timing of the call. What gave it away wasn't just the voice, but the chilling familiarity of the situation. The sudden appearance of the roses, the ominous messages, and now this call from "Daphne 💕" at the most unsettling moment – it all clicked into place. It couldn't be a random coincidence. Your gut twisted with certainty; it had to be the stalker, cunningly using the guise of your friend's name to unnerve you further.

The voice spoke again, "I missed our little game, I'm glad you blocked my last number, as it made our game much more interesting," the voice taunted, sending shivers coursing down your spine.

"Why are you doing this? Is Daphne okay?" You shouted into the phone, your thoughts running wild with a million questions and concerns. The stalker's laughter sent chills down your spine and increased your frustration. "Why would I hurt Daphne if you're the one I want?" the stalker laughed again as if your worry was a joke to them. It seemed clear that the stalker had little to no compassion for your best friend's safety.

You desperately needed a way to get to the point, so you chose not to waste any more time. "If you're after me, then why are you pretending to be my best friend? Wouldn't it be easier to just text me with your number?”

"Well, that doesn't seem to work. You've blocked every number I've tried," the stalker replied, their tone oozing with smugness. It dawned on you that they'd been meticulously keeping track of every number you blocked, instead of simply moving on like a normal person would.

"Touche," you responded evenly, sensing the stalker's growing frustration as you stood your ground. Their voice took on a darker edge as they acknowledged your resistance. "Blocking my numbers isn't cutting it. Looks like we need to switch up the game," they declared, sending a chill down your spine. You couldn't shake the feeling that their next move would be far more sinister than merely sending flowers.

"So, what do you propose we do now that blocking your numbers isn't working?" you asked calmly. The stalker laughed, a menacing sound that only added to the tension between the two of you. "I have a few ideas," the stalker replied, their tone of voice hinting at something sinister. "Let's hear them," you replied, keeping your tone of voice as calm as possible to disguise the fear growing inside of you. The stalker paused for a moment before speaking, as if they were plotting their next move.

You walked into your kitchen and grabbed a knife like you did a week prior. The stalker's dismissive response sent a chill down your spine. "And a flimsy kitchen knife is a solution... sweetpea, those knives in that block of yours aren't as sharp as you think," the stalker responded, making you look around nervously. The stalker had made it clear that they could see you, which raised several new questions. How much could they see? Could they see you right now? Were they hiding nearby?

"Like that would deter me. In my hands, this knife can and will kill you," you spoke with false confidence as you walked to your bedroom. The stalker's dismissive attitude frustrated you, and you were tired of being the one who was afraid. You wanted to gain the upper hand in this situation, and you were prepared to do whatever it took to protect yourself.

You grabbed your desk chair and a pillow before taking a seat with the phone and knife still in hand. The stalker responded in a mocking tone, "Oh, what are you going to do with that knife? Stab me through the phone?" They were challenging you, and you were determined to prove that you weren't as afraid as they thought. You were determined not to let them get under your skin and decided to respond with your mocking tone. "Maybe I will," you replied, deciding to match their confidence.

"No need for hypotheticals… you smell good by the way," he responded, so casually it made you gasp audibly as you suddenly imagined how close he was. "No need to get all fussy," the stalker continued, their tone of voice a mixture of amusement and malice. The thought of the stalker's presence just inches away from you made you hot and uncomfortable in a way you hadn't felt before.

You shut the blinds in your bedroom and frantically rummaged through your closet, stabbing at clothes out of sheer terror. Opting to take a seat, you vowed not to sleep until the psycho lurking in your house was either gone or dealt with permanently. The idea of him being in such proximity sent waves of unease rippling through your body. Uncertain of his capabilities, paranoia set in, making you hyper-aware of every subtle sound or movement. It felt like only a matter of time before you'd hear him drawing closer.

The night felt like it stretched on forever, filled with nothing but anxiety and dread. You must've checked the locks on every door and window a dozen times, feeling more paranoid with each click. Even going around, peeping through the blinds and peeking under the bed, making sure nothing was lurking in the shadows before finally settling down in your desk chair for the night. You could barely stop yourself from jumping at every little sound. Around 1 am, you started to feel tired but kept yourself awake for as long as you could. However, your exhaustion soon caught up to you, and you began to yawn constantly, fighting against the urge to fall asleep.

It was 1:30 am when you decided you couldn't take it anymore. You were thirsty and tired, and the three-day-old water bottle on your nightstand didn't sound too appealing. You grabbed the knife as you made your way down the stairs, trying to stay alert while simultaneously fighting the exhaustion that was starting to take over. You finally reached the kitchen and took a deep breath, grateful for the chance to stretch your legs. You poured yourself a glass of water and gulped it down quickly as you thought of the long night you still had ahead of you.

You can feel the exhaustion slowly taking over as your eyes start to feel heavy, and the surroundings turn hazy. You can feel yourself starting to lose control as the exhaustion takes over, and it becomes harder and harder to stay alert. You feel as if you're caught in a fog, losing touch with reality more and more as time goes on.

You stumble into your room, your vision getting blurrier by the second. Exhaustion has you barely standing. Darkness starts to take over, swallowing everything up as your surroundings turn fuzzy. It feels like you're losing control, like a heavy blanket pulling you down. A fog surrounds you, making everything dark. As darkness closes in, you can feel yourself slipping away, struggling to stay upright as your vision fades to black.

You jolted awake as something rough brushed against your wrist. Your surroundings rushed back into focus as the exhaustion subsided a bit. You tried to see what had touched your wrist, only to find your hands tied securely to the headboard with rough, coarse rope. After the initial shock wore off, you started to feel the tension in your wrists as the ropes began to dig into the skin.

Your room was dark, illuminated only by the moonlight flooding in from your window. The blinds and window were now open, letting in a cool breeze. You looked around in a panic, and that's when you saw him. The contractor you hired 2 months ago to help with house renovations stood menacingly in the moonlight, his large frame and pepper-sprinkled hair glinting in the moonlight. His appearance made you feel a wave of fear and suspicion, which was only furthered as he stepped forward into the light.

You tried to speak, but the words caught in your throat as you realized he had covered your mouth with tape. Panic surged within you, questions swirling in your mind like a tempest. Why was this happening? Why are you? What was the significance of the roses? And the most pressing question: How did he get into your house?

His presence loomed over you, a sinister silhouette against the moonlit backdrop. Every detail seemed amplified in the dimness—the way his eyes bore into yours, the rough texture of the tape against your skin, the faint rustle of fabric as he shifted closer. Fear pulsed through your veins, a relentless drumbeat drowning out all other thoughts.

You struggled against the bindings, the coarse rope biting into your wrists as you attempted to break free. But his gaze held you captive, a silent reminder of your vulnerability. During the chaos, a desperate longing for answers consumed you, driving you to seek clarity in the shadows that enveloped you both.

As the stalker's words filled the dimly lit room, they carried a weight of uncertainty. "I just want to keep you safe," he said, his voice oddly calm, though it sent shivers down your spine. Despite his calm demeanor, you couldn't shake the feeling that there was something off about his intentions.

"I gave you those roses because they mean something to me," he explained, his tone determined yet unsettling, the twang of his accent adding an eerie quality to his words. His explanations felt like pieces of a puzzle you couldn't quite solve, leaving you with more questions than answers.

His justifications for his actions only added to the confusion. "Breakin' in, you see, it was necessary," he continued, his explanation sounding more like a feeble excuse. You couldn't help but wonder what drove him to such extremes, what twisted logic fueled his intrusive behavior.

With each passing moment, the lines between concern and obsession blurred further, leaving you to navigate the murky waters of his intentions. As he spoke of protection and affection in that Southern accent, you couldn't shake the feeling that there was more to his story than he let on.

"Now," he murmured, his voice taking on an eerie calmness, "I'm going to remove the tape from your mouth. I suggest you cooperate." His tone held a chilling finality, a warning wrapped in false benevolence. "Behave, and we won't have any problems."

As the words escaped his lips, a twisted narrative unfolded, stirring a disturbing sense of familiarity within you. Despite the fear gnawing at your core, there was an unsettling draw towards him, as if his words carried a hidden allure.

His voice, soft yet commanding, stirred conflicting emotions within your mind. Memories of your first encounter flickered like distant flames, igniting a spark of attraction amidst the chaos of fear and confusion.

His eyes, once unsettling, now seemed to hint at vulnerability, reflecting a mirror to your uncertainties. His determination to protect you, though shrouded in ambiguity, blurred the lines between reality and manipulation, leaving you to wonder at his true intentions.

Amidst the turmoil, a nagging sense of unease whispered warnings of danger, urging caution in the face of the unknown. The chill that ran down your spine couldn't be dismissed, as his calm demeanor masked the darkness lurking beneath the surface.

As he reached to remove the tape from your mouth, a fleeting thought crossed your mind, betraying the depths of your confusion. Despite the fear and uncertainty, an undeniable attraction lingered towards this enigmatic figure, the same one who had once breathed life into the walls of your home.

Trapped and bound, vulnerability heightened with each passing moment. The stalker's unsettling words hung in the air as he approached, his eyes now a mix of intensity and what seemed like genuine concern. The tape on your mouth held back the words you longed to shout in defiance.

As the tape peeled away, a shiver coursed through you, a mix of fear and inexplicable attraction. The dim room bore witness to the conflicting dance of emotions, a macabre waltz where danger intertwined with a bizarre sense of connection.

His fingers brushed against your skin as the tape came off, sending a jolt through you. "I suggest you behave," he murmured, his words dripping with a possessive edge that made your skin crawl. Tension thickened in the air as his touch lingered, tracing an unsettling path along your bound wrists.

His actions became increasingly invasive as he leaned closer, his eyes piercing into yours with a sinister intent. "I'll behave if you stop this madness," you retorted, your voice quivering with defiance and desperation. The stalker's eyes narrowed, a sinister smile playing at the corners of his lips.

"Ah, but this ain't madness, my dear," he drawled in a Southern twang, his voice dripping with unsettling calmness. "This is love, a love that you'll come to understand in time."

The words sent a chill down your spine, but you refused to let him see your fear. "Love doesn't involve tying someone up against their will," you shot back, determination lacing your words.

His laughter echoed in the darkness, a hollow sound that sent shivers down your spine. "Oh, but my love, you'll see," he said, his voice taking on a dangerous edge. "You'll come to realize that everything I do, I do for you."

Your heart raced as you struggled against your bindings, the stalker's presence suffocating in its intensity. "Let me go," you pleaded, your voice betraying the fear you fought so hard to hide.

But the stalker only leaned in closer, his breath hot against your ear, his Southern twang adding an eerie quality to his words. "I'll let you go when you understand," he whispered, his words a haunting promise of things to come. "Until then, we're playing a game, you and I, a game of cat and mouse."

Your pulse quickened at his words, the sinister game unfolding in the darkness. "I don't want to play your game," you countered, your voice trembling with a mix of fear and defiance.

"But you've already joined, my dear," the stalker replied, his tone chillingly matter-of-fact, his Southern twang accentuating the unsettling atmosphere. "And you'll find that I'm quite skilled at it."

His words loomed in the air, casting a weighty tension that embraced the room. Each of his calculated moves and carefully chosen words served the purpose of unsettling your equilibrium.

"I won't let you win," you declared, rallying every ounce of courage within.

The stalker's grin widened, a predatory gleam sparking in his eyes. "Oh, but that's what makes it so exhilarating," he whispered, his voice sending shivers down your spine. "The chase, the uncertainty. It's what keeps us alive."

A hard swallow marked the acknowledgment of your grim reality. Trapped within the twisted game he orchestrated, you recognized the stakes were high. Refusing to play the role of a pawn in his deranged scheme, you vowed to escape, regardless of the price.

As the tension simmered between you, the air crackled with an unsettling energy. The stalker's gaze bore into yours, a magnetic pull tainted with danger and an underlying primal essence.

"I won't be a pawn in your sick game," you spat, your voice trembling with a blend of fear and defiance, yet underscored by an undeniable undercurrent of something more.

The stalker's smirk deepened, a trace of amusement flickering in his eyes. "Oh, but my dear, you already are," he purred, his voice low and seductive. "And soon enough, you'll come to relish every twist and turn."

He reached for the blanket and slowly pulled it down, revealing the t-shirt you had worn earlier. The cool breeze in the room caused your nipples to harden. "What are you doing?" you panicked, attempting to move away, but the rope still tightly bound your arms and ankles. "I said behave." Gosh, you wished you could put a name to the face; it had been so long since you'd talked to your contractor that you'd completely forgotten his name.

He removed the blanket completely, walking to the end of your bed where your ankles were tied. You felt a sense of relief when you saw him start untying your ankles. "If you do something stupid, there will be consequences," he finished untying your ankles and kissed your feet softly.

The change in move had you taken by surprise. You didn't know what to expect next, but you were suddenly aware that you were in a very vulnerable position. He planted his hands on your hips and pinned you down on the bed, his strength overwhelming. You were completely at his mercy, and you could feel the heat of his breath on your neck. A shiver ran through your body as you realized how easily he could overpower you if he wanted to.

Your body goes into survival mode, and you fight against his hold with all the strength you can muster. But it's useless. He's too big. Too heavy. Too imposing. He moves to straddle you, pinning your legs between his screams with frustration, attempting to buck him off. He laughs at the attempt, the rich sound of his amusement sending a chill down your spine,” Shh..just relax sweet pea I won't hurt you” he gently brushes some stray hairs out of my face.

"Get off me!" You shouted, kicking your feet up and down, but there was no budge in his position. He grabbed your face forcefully, drawing it closer to his own, and you could smell the mixture of liquor and mint on his breath as he spoke with a threatening tone. "Keep pissing me off, I dare you."

A panic starts to come over you, sweat starts to drip down your hair like a pulsing sensation starts to pulse between your legs, “the stalker whispered with a sickening grin. As he lifted your t-shirt, exposing some of the skin on your stomach, you felt his breath on your ear, and a shiver ran down your spine. Your body was reacting to his touch in a way that filled you with shame.

His rough calloused hands started exploring higher, slowly but surely making their way over your stomach and up towards your chest lifting your t-shirt more and more with each movement. You felt the soft touches against your skin, his fingers slowly tracing up your body, creating a sense of danger and excitement. You were frightened, and your mind went into panic mode. "What's your name? Is it Josh or Jake?" the words came spilling out suddenly as you wanted to distract him from what his hands were doing.

The stalker was caught off guard by your sudden question, and the change in your tone pulled him out of his trance for a moment. He chuckled, as his fingers continued to explore your body. "My name is not Josh or Jake," he whispered. "My name is much more interesting than that." He leaned in closer, his breath warm against your skin as his fingers continued to trail up toward your chest. He started to knead your breasts softly.

"My name is Joel, and I'm shocked that you don't remember," Joel said with a sadistic smirk. He sat up, allowing your legs to move freely, and you immediately rolled around to cover your exposed skin. It didn't matter whether you got rope burns on your wrists or not, as long as he wasn't able to touch you intimately. Your body was still tingling from his earlier touches, and no matter how much you tried to ignore it, the sensations were still there.

"Maybe I should make you remember it for next time." Joel's voice had a harsher tone to it as he spoke, and there was a hint of anger in his eyes as he watched you roll around to cover up the exposed skin. Maybe he was angry that you didn't remember him, or maybe he was angry because you seemed to be resisting his advances. The reason didn't matter. What mattered was that he looked pissed.

He walked back over to your ankles and started to tug on your pants making them come off in one swift motion before grabbing one of your legs and lifting it roughly kissing your ankle and lower calf you tried to kick your legs but to no avail, it was like it didn't affect him it was kinda hot, what no? Get it together he's your stalker

You were left helpless in your t-shirt and panties scared and unsure of what to say or do as you're body was betraying your brain my pause in thinking gave him enough time to discard your panties and put them into his jeans pocket…You glanced over him swiftly, taking in his broad, fit physique, which seemed to defy his age. He carried a presence that suggested he might even be older than your father if not the same age. what had felt like 15 seconds had been long enough for him to pin your knees down to your bed

If you tried to buck and get away you would only shove your pussy closer to his face, you had an intense pink blush on your cheeks at the action he was so quick and seamless unlike any male you'd ever been with you stiffen the moonlight barely allows you to see him making you angrier feeling even more exposed to him.

He starts to kiss your upper thigh making you gasp at his actions as he slowly makes his way closer to your mound he teases you knowing that your body is betraying you as your legs shake suddenly the closer he gets to your core. He took his time kissing both your legs and even your lower stomach every so often as he switched.

“The only sounds I want to hear out of you are praise, my name, or your moans'' he placed a kiss directly onto your clit making you arch your back in pleasure causing your hips to lift off the bed. “You smell and taste like candy” he gripped your hips and roughly brought your hips back down onto the bed “Now stay still and let me enjoy my food”

Joel didn't hold back he kept his hands on your knees keeping your spread and ready for whatever he wanted to do to you, he didn't hold back in his movements his tongue lapped up every juice your body produced like it was the best thing he'd ever tasted you bite your lip trying not to give him and satisfaction of knowing the pleasure he was giving you. You were grateful your hands were bound if not you weren't sure you could hold off on running and tugging your hands through his hair.

You feel and smell your arousal your body is shaking and you're struggling to stay quiet he knows it and isn't making it any easier as he starts to change his technique he uses his teeth to bite your clit softly allowing his tongue to attack no mercy his movements calculated as he listened to the sweet sounds of your moans started to escape.

He pulled away making you whimper before changing the position he sat on her knees before pulling your ass off the bed and pushing your legs so they were at the side of your head he spit on your pussy before using his hand to spread the spit around your pussy making the surface even wetter. “You're not behaving you're holding back” he pauses and puts two fingers into your pussy pumping in and out slowly making your eyes roll to the back of your head and moan softly…fucking heaven. “See how much better it feels when you don't hold anything in?” he taunted you as he began to curl his fingers hitting that one spot that made you see stars.

You moaned feeling on edge you tugged on the ropes holding your hands hostage you wanted to touch him so badly. He began to bite on your clit just enough to give you pleasure but not enough to hurt. He brought the hand that wasn't fingering you so deep you were seeing stars up to your breasts moving your stupid t-shirt out the way to pinch and kneed the smooth skin.

You couldn't take it anymore. Your orgasm was coming faster than ever your moans were not contained. You were grateful for the seclusion of the woods that surround your house. It probably sounded like a murder was taking place with how loud your moans were getting.

Joel knew you were close as well. He stopped kneading your breast and used his free hand to hold one of your legs down as they began to shake rapidly, he added another finger and made his motions faster. You couldn't take it anymore you screamed out “OH GOD JOEL!!!” you started to shake as he continued to finger you and hold your legs open he moved away from your pussy to get more leverage to hold down your shaking body “JOEL…stop.., it's too much” you gasped and started to cry at the overstimulation he was giving you.

Then he finally let go, letting your legs down. Your vision was blurry from your tears. Joel stood up at the end of your bed. The sun was beginning to rise, giving you a better look at him. God, he was just as hot as the first day you met him. “I hope you don't think we're done so soon?” he joked you were shocked for a man his age he's lasting longer than you thought possible, the started to undress himself revealing his chest he was even broader without a shirt he had a small belly but bellow it was a large raging cock it had to be as thick as a soda can and longer than any dick you'd seen in real life it was majestic .” cat got your tongue?” he climbed on top of you and met your lips with a sloppy kiss.

You both began to make out like horny teenagers. You could taste your arousal on his tongue. He ran his hands through your hair and down your body he pulled back for a second before ripping your t-shirt in half “Hey!” you protested, “it kept getting in the way of what I wanted” he started to kiss down your neck leaving bruises as he moved along your neck and collar bone. You groaned in frustration as you couldn't touch him, your wrists were becoming raw and red with pain. He noticed and kissed your wrists but didn't untie them, making you squirm to try and loosen the ropes. Joel grabbed your face roughly "When you misbehave, you don't always get what you want," Joel said, using a more stern tone. "Now be good and stop squirming around like a child who didn't get what they wanted." he let go of your face and started to stroke his cock.

He put his hand in front of your mouth “Spit” You spit into his hand and watched as he used your spit as lube for him to stroke his dick, he spread your legs open again he pushed your knees back close to your head but not far enough for your ass to be off the bed but enough to give him a good view of your pussy glistening in the morning light.

He rubbed the head of his cock up and down your folds causing you to gasp nervously for what was to come, he slowly started to insert his dick into you screaming at him and moved your hips away as he tried to insert the tip “Ah!” you kick at him “stop it doesn't fit” you plead with him for him to stop or maybe stretch you more. “Aww poor baby never had a real cock have you” he inserted the tip of his dick filling causing you to arch your back slightly you rapidly shake your head no to answer his questions “Words” his voice sounds cold and dominant as he pulls you by your hips onto his dick

It's so deep you feel it in your throat you can't help but moan out at the feeling so painful but so pleasurable “Now…” he pulls out almost completely before slamming back in “Have you never been with a real man like me?” He continues to apply slow deep thrusts as he talks to you making your eyes roll to the back of your head “god I can barely fit” he eggs you on as he begins to use his thumb to rub your clit adding just enough pressure to have you moaning out for more.

“Please…more I want more” you beg as your hips start to meet his thrusts. He begins to pump into you faster grabbing onto your hips and roughly digging your hips into the mattress as he thrusts harder and faster into you the pain has completely faded and all you feel is pure euphoria as he fucks you.

You haven't been able to stop moaning and you quickly get embarrassed as a loud shriek leaves your mouth as he hits that spot again you'd never had anyone fuck you like this you don't feel pleasure for a moment he's made you feel good over and over listened to your body and understood how a women's pleasure works. “Joel…please” You didn't Even know what you were begging for, you just longed for more for anything he was willing to give you.

“Do you wanna cum?” he taunts biting your shoulder as he continued thrusting into you, you were lying if you said you didn't want to come you wanted so too so bad and he knew it he was experienced he could tell by the way your pussy was pulsing, your breath became sloppy, the way your toes curled he knew he just wanted you to say it. “Answer me or I won't let you cum at all” he growled, applying pressure to your clit using his thumb “Yes yes god yes please make me cum” Your back arched and you moved your body into him as much as you could.

You're juices dripped down your thighs a set of continuous moans fall out your mouth “You're gonna cum with me sweet pea fill you with all my baby’s” he groans and pulls your thighs into his arms so your legs are flat against his chest allowing you to feel him in your spine the sound of the bed squeaking fills the room as his thrusts became more erratic “ready?” he groans deeply and rubs your clit faster and faster until your vision suddenly went fuzzy as your orgasm washed over one another. You felt his sticky cum flood into your pussy. The feeling was so warm it felt like it would never stop cumming thank god for IUDs.

Joel didn't let go of your legs, instead, he pushed into you making sure as much of his cum as possible would stay inside of you, he leaned down into you making your legs right next to your ears he leaned in for a passionate kiss before pulling out of you.

A dead silence reigned over the room the morning sun shined through your bedroom window as the smell of sex overwhelmed your senses, after a few moments Joel undid the rope that had your hands tied to the headboard your wrists were red and bruised from rubbing against the rope so hard, Joel put his clothes back on as you lay in bed staring at the ceiling finally releasing what you just did you fucked your stalker and liked it?

Your thoughts raced as Joel came back into view, the last person you wanted to see at that moment. "My real number..." he muttered, tossing a business card in your direction. You glanced over the card.

‘Miller Brothers Contracting and Co….’

He hesitated at your bedroom door before exiting the room entirely.

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jillsandwhichs · 6 months ago

Text

Our Future Days

Joel Miller x Reader series, Chapter 1, Move in day

Masterlist

Pairing: Fem!reader x Joel Miller

Summary: You officially move from oregan to texas and get to meet your very new & handsome neighbor, Joel

WC: 3.1k

Type: SFW

Some thing's you need to know before reading: this is a series, not a one shot collection! you (the reader) already have a semi premade backstory. first off, you're originally from oregon. you studied at med school and got a job offer in texas to become a doctor, which you took. you are 23 in this but if you don't like that, imagine any age (18+) and i did make joel younger 26 (until the 20 year time jump, he'll be 46) but he does still have sarah, just pretend it's not wonky LMAO! one more thing, ya have a dog in this fic, he's a boy but imagine any breed you'd like! aside from that, this is tlou game version but i included some sides from the show! a couple more things: 1. all characters from tlou1/2 will be mentioned/featured. 2. this takes place before outbreak, then eventually outbreak day, then eventually in the apocalypse. 3. this is a slow burn romance (drabbles of it in each chapter though, esp when it progresses) and does feature a decent amount of smut. 4. JOEL NEVER DIES!!!

A/n: Hi! Hope you all enjoy. Please check out my masterlist, there's a lot of stuff there. You can get to know me, you can see the rules of my blog and then you can see all of my fanfictions. You'll be able to find the previous chapters to this fic and upcoming ones. You'll also be able to find my Wattpad & AO3. Thank you

Tapping your fingers on the steering wheel, you matched the beat of the song playing on your cars radio. It was a song by Blake Shelton. You weren't a huge fan of him but he had some classics. It has been such a long day for you. You've been driving for the past two hours, not a single break in between. You just wanted to get to your new home as soon as you could. You could tell your dog, Becker, needed to go potty as well. He'd just have to hold out.

The GPS on your phone stated you were only about ten minutes away. The center of Austin TX was busy as all hell, so that time span could get longer by the second. So many cars & people flooded the streets. "God dammit." You mumbled to yourself, rolling your eyes as you seen all the upcoming traffic ahead. This was going to be a long night. You had no clue when you'd even be able to get into bed. Then again, it was only 4:30 in the afternoon, almost evening.

Behind you, in the backseat, you could hear Becker whimpering & whining. "Don't worry boy, we're almost home, just a little bit longer." You cooed to him, reaching your right hand back and allowing him to lick you. You got Becker as a graduation gift a few weeks ago. You two have bonded ever since. You were never a cat person, dog's were more of your style. "You'll be able to go potty soon." You said to him, pulling your hand back up and holding onto the wheel.

Traffic wasn't going as slow as you intended, was traffic always going to be like this though? This ain't going to be pleasant if so. Especially working for the hospital. Imagine an emergency happens and you're needed but the roads are packed, that's going to be one helluva time. But, you wanna think positively. You missed your family too. It's going to be hard without them, especially your mom. She is your number one supporter and without her in the same home as you, it'll be a large change.

You turned the radio up, hearing the country music blast throughout your car but not loud enough to scare your dog. Dogs ears are sensitive and you didn't wanna bother him further than he already was. No doggo wants to be stuck in a car all day, especially in this heat. Despite it being early September, it was still quite warm out. That's another big change from Oregon, you imagine that back home, it's either really windy or heavily raining. The change could be nice though.

The sound of Becker panting was clear as day, it only made you feel more guilty. "Hold on baby." You muttered to him before you then rolled your window down and the window directly behind you, not a lot though, you didn't want him to jump out or something. Through your rearview mirror, you could see his slobbery tounge blowing in the wind as he stuck his head out the window. "Hah, good boy!" You giggled, turning left onto the exit, finally getting off of this miserable highway.

Finally, the road wasn't full anymore. It was a downtown rural area now, cars slowly made their way through the town. Austin is busy, yes, but this side of it, not so much. The only logical reason it was super busy on the highway and earlier roads was because people are getting/going to work. Your first day at the hospital is on Monday. You were nervous but in a great way. You have been non stop thinking about it. All of the work you've put in and you're officially where you wanted to be. Life was going good... For once...

You passed by all sorts of different places. Gas stations, fast food chains, locally owned stores & stands, it felt so honey. Back in Oregon, you lived in the center of the city, it was always so lively and never calm. Austin is like that too but not as bad, and definitely not as bad as Dallas is. You were grateful you didn't end up moving there or even somewhere that was worse. Austin was a good enough fit for you.

The GPS showed you were only a minute or two away from home, your heart was racing a bit. You've never been on your own before and you least expected it to be in a completely different state. Luckily, a week from now, you'll be going back home for the weekend. It'll be comforting. You'll definitely make sure to call your family everyday, you made sure they knew that too. They'd have to simply put up with it.

You could tell you were getting closer due to the change in scenery. There weren't any establishments around these parts, just either compact or extensive suburban homes. You actually used to make fun of those perfect American families who lived in these types of areas but look at you now. Back home, you lived in a small house, only two bedrooms but you were an only child so it was never a problem. You did wish for siblings growing up but you understand now that if you had some, things would be a whole lot different.

As you turned left, the tracker built into your phone made a dinging noise, indicating you had arrived at your destination. It wasn't wrong. Just to the left, you could see your newly purchased home. It made your heart skip a beat. Not only were you nervous but you were also so happy. You glimmered as you pulled right into the driveway and set your car in park. You could tell Becker knew this was your guy's new home, his whimpers weren't ones of boredness but rather excitement. "One second." You sighed out before getting out of the car.

Stepping out of your car, you sighed softly as you breathed in the fresh air. The smell of outside was always so welcoming. You grabbed your purse out of your car too and swung it across your shoulder. It was a brown leather purse with an embroidered strap. You then opened up the backseat so Becker could jump on out. "Stay over here buddy." You chuckled out, scratching the top of his head a few times before closing both doors. You had quite a bit of stuff in your trunk & backseat but you hired a truck to drive all of your other belongings here. It wouldn't be there for another day or so.

Becker ran off to the side of the house to go potty ; You trusted him enough to not run off. He was a good dog. You went to the back of your car and popped open your trunk. It was a mess but everything you needed for the night was in there. You even bought an air mattress, your back would die trying to sleep on a wooden floor. You grabbed the first two boxes, they weren't very big, and set them on the concrete of your driveway. They just had toiletries in them.

You grabbed out another box, this one was a bit bigger than the other two. It had all of your kitchen appliances in it. You were excited to cook your very first dinner in your very own home. You already decided on making Pesto Pasta, one of your favorites. In your trunk, there was the air mattress box. It wasn't going to be the best way to sleep but it'd have to suffice for the night, your proper bed should be in either tomorrow or on Sunday.

Whilst grabbing out the air mattress, you heard the sound of a truck driving past and pulling into the driveway across from you. They must've been your neighbors. Your neighbors back home weren't the nicest. There were the Johnson's so were beyond uppity and thought they were better than everyone else, they lived beside you. Then there was Cassandra and Cody, they were your age and pretty kind except they were literal kleptos.

You ignored the truck behind you, just trying to get everything you needed for the night. You could hear Becker barking but you didn't know what it was he was doing it at. You figured a wild animal, maybe a bunny or a stray. Becker was actually from a shelter, you'd never buy an animal from PetSmart or whatever. "Becker, quit your barking!" You shouted at him, nudging him to come over to you. Maybe he wasn't good with new environments.

You placed the last cardboard box from your trunk on top of another one, shooting your eyes to look at Becker. He was looking at the truck across the street, barking at it. "Oh boy, quit it." You spoke out to him but he didn't listen. You went to grab onto his collar but right as you did, he bolted off into their driveway. He was a friendly dog, you didn't think he'd do anything bad, he was just inquisitive, but it was still bad of him to run off like that.

"Becker!" You yelled, jogging across the street to grab him. You watched as two men got out of the black truck. The one in the driver's seat had a mullet and lighter hair than the other man, he also seemed shorter. The other one though had short dark hair, although you couldn't tell if it was purely brown or black. He was well built, along with the other man. Were they brothers? That's the only assumption that came to mind.

Once you reached their driveway, you grabbed Becker and pulled him back to you. The man getting out of the passenger seat looked back at you and had a puzzled look before letting out a chuckle beneath his breath. "Listen, I'm so sorry, he's just curious." You sighed out. Becker was now listening as he sat down right by your feet. "Sorry, we'll be out of your hair." You giggled, beginning to turn around before you heard the man's voice speak up.

"You just move in across the street?" He asked you, his voice sounded southern and it was very deep. "Oh uhm, yeah, just got here tonight actually." You said kindly, looking back at him again. "Well, welcome then, and to your dog." He snickered out. "I'm Joel, this is Tommy." Joel spoke deeply, pointing over at the other man. You let the two men know your name before asking them whether or not they were brothers, and they were. You weren't surprised, they did share similar facial features.

"Where are you from?" Joel raised, his arms crossed. His arms were huge, he definitely has a nice body. "I'm from Oregon." You said softly, placing your slender hands onto your waist. "Damn, that's a long ways out. What made you move all the way here?" "Got a job offer at the hospital." You said with a titter, his accent was thick. "Oh, you a nurse or something?" He questioned, leaning up against his truck. "No, a doctor. Recently gradated from medschool." You explained, glancing over at his brother as he walked into the house. Maybe they lived together.

"Well how bout that? I'm just a contractor." "That's nice." You added, tucking strands of your thin hair behind your ear. "Yeah, yeah, well I'll let you continue settling in. If you need any help with uh larger furniture, me and my brother can stop by, we helped the Adler's when they first moved in." Joel said with a deep voice, pointing his index to the home beside his. "That would be great, thanks, luckily I don't have to deal with the bullshit of larger furniture today, it'll be in either tomorrow or Sunday."

"Alrighty, well, you have yourself a good evening. See you." Joel said with a sly smirk, slowly inching backwards. "You too, Joel." You gave him a slight smile before patting Becker to follow behind you. You made your way across the street, allowing Becker to run around in his new yard. You took a gander back and seen Joel looked back at you before entering his home. When you saw his eyes on you, you felt a deep pit in your stomach. Nothing bad, rather just glee or something. You couldn't pin it.

Around your neck was a lanyard, it had the key to your home, you assumed it was locked. At least you hoped, you don't want any squatters inside. You unlocked the white door and opened it, stepping inside of it. The sunset beamed in through the windows throughout the house. It was still dark though, every single light was switched on. The seller said you'd have to go to the basement to switch them all on. That sounded like a fun time!

One by one, you dragged each box into the home, keeping some on the floor and placing some on the island counter. You didn't plan on unpacking any of it tonight, you were restless and just wanted to lay down for the night, despite it only being 5 PM. The more sleep you get, the easier it'll be tomorrow. You definitely had to get a lot of sleep Sunday considering on Monday, you start your first day. Even though it's just training, you wanna be as awake as possible.

You ambled towards the front door again and away from the kitchen to call Becker in. He'd have to deal with the floor for the night. He is a cuddly dog, he loves big comfy areas but without a bed or a couch, there's no way. "Becker!" You said with a rowdy voice, "C'mon baby." He came running over to you and past your legs, going into the house and treading around like a mad man. "Oh good boy." You chuckled, petting him gently.

You walked back over to the kitchen and grabbed the air mattress, you needed to get it open and blown up. It was sealed to a T, your nails were definitely not enough to get it open. Striding towards the appliances box, you opened it up and searched through it, taking out a knife to slice it open. You are quite clumsy so you were praying you wouldn't stab the mattress on accident. It didn't help that Becker felt the need to push himself up against you, seeking attention & love as if he's starved from it.

"Back off boy." You snorted, pulling the mattress out of it's box. It was all wrinkled up and looked compact. Although it was the size of a Full. You straightened it out on the living room floor, you didn't feel like carrying it all the way up the stairs. It came with a machine to blow it up and you connected it to the black cylinder hole, turning it on and hearing the loud blowing noise it was making. You didn't have any pillows, they were all packed up in that truck but luckily, you had a blanket, it was the one you let Becker use in the backseat when you were driving.

"You stay here mister." You stated out to Becker before beginning to make your way out of the front door to take the blanket out from the car. As you went outside, you noticed a bright light was on in Joel's house, just in one room though. You could also see the shadow of a smaller person's body walking through said room. Did he have a girlfriend? Or did Tommy have one? Maybe it was Tommy's. You convinced yourself of that at least.

After grabbing the blanket, you walked back inside and seen Becker already making himself a spot on the bed, despite it barley being inflated. "You little shit." You grinned, tossing the fuzzy blanket on top of him. Guess you were going to have to share.

The bed was officially ready to be slept on, you haven't been this excited to sleep in a very long time. Back home, you dreaded it. You would stay up all night, doing different stuff. Whether it was studying, painting, reading, working out, etc.. You were always doing something new. With Becker, it's been better. You're an affectionate person and he is as a dog. It may be a rough night, it always is sleeping somewhere new, but with him it may be easier.

Pulling the machine away from the bed, you turned it off and climbed underneath the blanket, feeling immediate warmth. The Texas heat also played a part in that. Back in Oregon, you had a heater beside your bed to help, you definitely didn't need one here. "Alright." You whispered to yourself, Becker lying right beside your feet, his fur was cozy. You were originally going to turn the lights on to your home but honestly, you were scared to go down there all alone, a pitch black basement? No thanks.

Trying to sleep in a new area was hard. You felt homesick. You miss your old room, the house noises, the feeling of it. You lived there your entire life, now you're thousands of miles away. Becker probably felt that way too, especially with how he connected with your father, they bonded. A week from now though, you'd be able to see them. It'd be easier. Another thing you couldn't stop thinking about was that man - Joel.

He seemed so different. He was kind & understanding, and that's just simply based on the short conversation the two of you had together. He was so willing to help you out, no one else was like that. It was a sweet welcoming. He was also very handsome. All the men back home weren't like that. That glimmer in his eyes wasn't something to ignore. It was the way he gazed at you that had you wrapped around the thought of him.

That brother of his was good looking too, definitely not as much, but either way. Were they both contractors? It appeared as though they had just left work so maybe they work together. And who was that smaller person walking throughout his house earlier? Had to be a girlfriend. A daughter? No way, the two of them looked to young to even have children. There was still a chance though, teen pregnancies aren't uncommon. You presume you'll deal with a lot of them as a Doctor.

Your eyes felt more & more heavy. Becker's deep breathing made you weary too. The pitch blackness of the room was helpful ; White sound would've been helpful too. Sleeping in complete silence was torture. All you could really hear was your dog and your own breathing. You were completely spent for the day. And you were ready to hit the hay.

Divider Creds: animatedglittergraphics-n-more

#the last of us #tlou #joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #reader insert #joel miller fanfiction #slow burn #eventual smut #tlou fanfiction #tumblr fyp

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theetherealbloom · 2 years ago

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UNEVEN ODDS - CH. 6

Chapter Six: I Swear A Million Times To Hold You Just The Way You Like

Summary: The Reader is dragged into the Last of Us universe and has no choice but to watch the events unfold or will she be able to change what was already written?

Paring: Joel Miller x Fem!Reader

Warnings: SMUT SMUT SMUT IN THIS CHAPTER AHH, (besties wrap it up!) Lowkey this chapter was poorly edited so sorry! Age-gap Romance, Violence, ANGST, Swearing, Suicide, FLUFF, PTSD, Depression, Anxiety, Crying, Suggestive content, the pandemic, character death, INFECTED, MY SCIENCE IS WONKY, probable plot holes, rusty writing, TLOU is dark please read at your own risk! (MINORS, please run away :,)

Word Count: 17.3k (I hope this makes up for the delay my bad)

A/N: HELLAUR HOOMANS! Thank you again for all the love and support you have given me for this series! I truly appreciate you all for being here <3 This chapter and episode feels a little bit personal to write since I am someone who also has PTSD, so when I watched Pedro’s performance during those difficult panic attack scenes, I truly felt represented and seen. For me, my PTSD is subtle and not overly loud or noticeable at first glance, so when I saw it being portrayed that way I started ugly crying pls--

Song: Sweet Disaster by Oh Wonder

Previous Chapter -> Next Chapter | Series Masterlist

TLOU WORLD – 2023

THREE MONTHS LATER…

WYOMING WILDERNESS, HEADING WEST – DAY

It’s been three months since the incident, and neither of you spoke about what happened that morning in Kansas City. The past few months of walking West have proven a challenge as the seasons begin to change. As you suspected, you noticed Joel slowly let Ellie in; he taught her how to look for tracks and how to properly keep watch the first time he fell asleep. Her questioning, her loving attitude, her nasty language, everything entered his heart gradually. He hadn't planned on it, but he now cares for her. You, on the other hand, were already fond of her, you taught her the more “fun” activities. Like looking for more constellations as time passes by, continuing educating her ASL, and teaching a few of your favorite songs from your original reality.

You occasionally hummed as the seasons changed, trying to fill the silence and somber with music. Joel and Ellie didn’t seem to mind, you asked if they were bothered or annoyed but Joel grunted, “Better than Ellie asking a million more questions.” You simply chuckled while Ellie protested and began to defend herself. And then there were the moments you couldn’t quite label. Small touches between you and Joel, providing each other comfort now and then, knowing how bad the loneliness can get to anyone. A squeeze on your shoulder, the brushing of fingers, and if you were lucky, you’d get to hold his hand for a period of time as you trekked through the terrain. You swore there were times you felt his gaze roaming every mile of skin you had, but every time you turned to look he was already busy doing something else.

The branches have exchanged their leaves for white sleeves and all warm-blooded creatures make ghosts as they breathe. As gentle as feathers, the snow piles high, this world gets rewritten and retraced every time. After seeing Cody crawling with infected, you three headed out to the large forest to find out if Tommy is still alive and in hiding. Even Ellie tried to point out that there was a possibility he didn’t make it, but as Joel had said before, he was persistent.

You came across a cozy cabin hidden in the forest. Realizing you had no other options, you had to ask for directions to where you were at the moment. A quiet and nice old lady, named Florence had resided and mentioned she was with her husband, Marlon. After making the soup she told three of you that her husband wouldn’t be happy they were in their home. You peeked past the curtains and out the window you saw he husband returning from hunting in the forest, hanging out two white rabbits by the door. Marlon walked inside his home to find her wife sitting upon the rocking chair, her gaze slowly moving towards Joel, him with his revolver out while you and Ellie are upstairs, quietly watching from the mezzanine.

Marlon reluctantly places his bow and arrows on the side entry table, removes his gloves, and unzips his outer jacket, while Joel grumbles out, “And the gun.” Marlon grunts, “Who the hell are you?” Joel walks a bit closer while demanding for him to cooperate, he says, “Just someone passing through. Take the gun out, two fingers only, put it out of reach.” The senior does as he’s told and places it on the other table and asks his wife who was quietly watching the interaction, “Why didn’t you shoot him?” She continues rocking back and forth, “The gun’s all the way over there. He didn’t hurt me by the way.”

“Yeah, I got eyes.” He nonchalantly replies and spots the empty soup bowl on the wooden living room table, “You made him soup?” Florence gives his husband an obvious answer, "Yeah, I did. It’s cold out.” He simply shakes his head and sits down on his own chair. “I’m looking for my brother.” Joel states and the other man replies and removes his cap, “Well, I ain’t seen him.” Your cowboy shakes his head, “I haven’t told you what he looks like.”

“He look anything like you?” He asks and Joel tilts his head, “A bit.”

Ellie taps your arm and whispers to you, “It’s you and Joel from the future.” You frown and shake your head as you whisper back to her, “No.” The young girl rolls her eyes, “Whatever, you should see the way he looks at you when you’re not paying attention.” You blink at her, and you’re seemingly left speechless.

“Then I ain’t seen him,” He says, “He’s got a girl and his wife with him.” You hear Florence say and you nearly choke on air in surprise. Joel turns to look at her, pissed, and confused, and didn’t even bother to correct her. Ellie yells next to you, “Can I come down?” Joel raises his voice at her, “No! Ellie!” You couldn’t stop her as she excitedly runs downstairs, and you have no choice but to follow her.

The elderly couple laughs knowingly, Joel looks at you and Ellie, “What did I just say?” And you give him an apologetic look and Ellie replies, “Joel, come on. They’re like a thousand.” Marlon questions aloud, “Who’s this little psycho and her mother?” Your mouth slightly parted open, about to inform him that you weren’t married to Joel and you weren’t her mother but Joel dismissed it, “Never mind them. I need you to tell us where we are.” He went to the middle of the living room, shoving the map in his direction, cheekily the man throws back, “If you got a map, why you lost?” Ellie’s lips turn downwards as she replies sarcastically, “Must’ve missed all the street signs in the enormous fucking forest.”

Marlon whistles out, “Holy.” And Florence chuckles, still enjoying the excitement that they haven’t had in years. Joel sighs and points out on the map, “We’re somewhere here. Exactly where? And your answer better be the same as your wife’s.” Marlon glances back at his wife, “Did you tell him the truth?” She nods, “Yeah.” He raises an eyebrow at her, “Are you telling me the truth?” She doesn’t hesitate, “Yeah.” He lets out a deep exhale as he leans over, pointing where you all were currently.

Joel places his revolver back in his holster, his eyebrows are furrowed and he sighs in frustration, “Well, you found a great place to hide, I guess.” He sits down and you sit right next to him and Ellie mimics you both. “Hide? Came here before you were born, sonny. Get the hell away from everybody.” Marlon replied as his wife gives her input, “I didn’t want to.” He grumpily waves her off and you lean next to Ellie, “Okay, there’s some truth in what you said.” She gives you a smirk in response.

“Listen, I didn’t mean to upset you about your brother but if you’ve come this far, then you know what’s out there. You seen Cody?” Marlon asked while Joel clenches his jaw, and Ellie replies, “Yeah, got close enough. It’s crawling with Infected.” He hums in agreement, “Yeah, Laramie and Wind River Reservation. Anywhere people used to be, you can’t go there no more.” Joel doesn’t give up and asks, “So you haven’t heard the name, ‘Tommy’?”

“Nope.” He simply says and Ellie questions, “What about the Fireflies?” Florence replies this time, “We get those in the summer.” The young girl frowns, “Not the bugs, the people.” Cluelessly the woman asks, “There are firefly people?” Her husband chuckles and Joel's frown grows deeper, creating harsh lines on his forehead, “You got any advice on the best way west?” The senior man doesn’t miss a beat, “Yeah. Go east. But you never go past the river here.” He then points to a specific location on the map, the blue stream that flows across the paper, “Ever.”

“What’s past the river?” Ellie asked, brave and a little naive, the kind wise Florence replies, “Death. We never see who’s out there but we see the bodies they leave behind. Some infected, some not.” She turns to look at Joel, “If your brother is west of the river, he’s gone.” You lift your eyes to the man next to you, Joel has his eyebrows pinched, his gaze distant, and the lines by the side of his mouth are evident. Your heart sinks at the chance that the elderly couple might be right. “You’re not gonna scare us,” Ellie softly says and the woman answers, “Scared him.” Her husband chuckles and Joel scrambles to get out of there, not saying a single word, he’s grabbing the map and packs up the rest of his things.

You and Ellie are quick to follow after him as she comments, “You don’t seriously believe them.” Joel’s footsteps are loud with every crunch of snow, “They’ve lived here a long time.” He turns and you do too to see Ellie grab a rabbit, “Put that back.” Ellie doesn’t listen and swings the dead rabbit behind her back, “They don’t know anything. Never heard of the fireflies.” Joel unexpectedly stops walking, and you can hear his breathing become labored as he places his hand on the wooden fence, you angle your head to the right in confusion and concern.

Joel only hears muffled echoes as the ringing in his ears overpowers his senses, “Joel? Are you okay?” You softly ask and there is no response, you hear Ellie begin to worry as well and lines begin to form across your forehead. “Shut up.” His voice was barely audible as he places his hand on his chest. You jerk back, but you try to decode what was happening. Ellie then asks him, “Holy shit. Are you dying?” He shakes his head in response, “I’m okay.” But the world seems to spin around him, his vision feels blurry and the weightlessness he feels is unsettling, unable to process the news he had just heard and the possible chance his brother is no longer alive. The further he goes West, the more his paternal empathy is starting to merge Ellie and Sarah into one.

Yours and Ellie’s voices merge into one large echo as you both try and make sure he’s alright. “I’m fine.” You both don’t buy it, “No, no, but are you? Because just a reminder that if you’re dead, we’re fucked.” Ellie said, referring to both of you, which seemingly brings Joel grounded remembering he is now a caretaker and guardian to the both of you, he turns to you as he assures, “I said I’m fine. It’s just the… cold air all of a sudden.”

You don’t buy it one bit but you don’t want to diagnose him immediately so you keep silent and listen to Ellie speak as she marches on forward while ducking under the wooden fence, “All right, uh… let’s go and find Tommy and, and the Fireflies.” Joel grunts and looks at you and you avert your eyes from him, quickly following Ellie.

“It’s gonna be easy,” Ellie said, stumbling a little but marching on, “All we have to do is cross the River of Death.”

All the bruises seem to surface like mud beneath the snow, your feet dug into the snow, a small thin path of footprints lay behind me, telling me where you have come from, but not where you are going. The winds were cold, almost freezing your skin with a simple touch. The icy winds blew against your jacket, the fabric keeping you warm, enough to feel comfortable but not to keep your cold thoughts away. You knew about Jackson, but you weren’t entirely sure where exactly the town was. You silently hope Tommy was fine and nothing had changed.

You gazed around the land, nothing but unending snow and ice, almost a hint that this land had gotten incredibly secluded through the years. After the trees reached the sky, children laughed and played, and the sounds of birds chirping in the woods woke me up from my long rest. It was almost as if the world itself was a part of you, but now that everything has turned frigid and awful, you hardly recognize it.

You see a river stream to your left, Ellie stops to look at it and rolls her eyes as she sarcastically says, “The River of Death. Scary.” Joel sighs, “Don’t start. It’s too close to dark. There’s some caves along the river. We’ll set up camp there, cross in the mornin’.” Ellie smiles, “Good. I’m starving. Should’ve stolen two rabbits.” You ruffle her hair a little bit and Joel replies, “We can get our own rabbits.”

Ellie excitedly asks as she looks up at Joel, “You gonna teach me how? You taught Birdie.” You bite back a smile from the memory, his entire firm body was behind you, hands on either side of you, the ghost of his breath as he whispered instructions creating a trail of goosebumps. If you were being honest, you were very close to kissing him, but you were too afraid to mess it all up, to ask if he felt it too, and continued to wait for him to be ready. “Just keep movin’.” Joel dismisses her and the girl sighs in frustration and exhaustion. You look to Joel, your eyes gazing into his brown ones, hoping that if you stare long enough you could magically read his mind, then turned to trail after Ellie.

WYOMING WILDERNESS, CAVE – NIGHT

Your campfire appeared to echo the starlight and bounced off the walls of the small cave as if the flames so close and so distant had so very much to say to one another. It crackled and spat before hissing into life. Its lambent light stole away the velvet-black shadows dancing on the wall. As that dry, withered stump slowly releases years and years of energy soaked up from the sun, the air, and the ground around it, outcome bright lights, whispering hisses, sizzling pops, and a thick, intoxicating smell of musky smoke and pine needles.

You sit atop a large rock by the edge with Ellie, both of your heads are tilted up, black heavens are the perfect stage upon which the brightest of hues dance. You could watch the aurora lights for infinity and always see that it is new, a unique moment and beauty in all of existence. Rays of light fall from the sky, making drapes that stretch across the sky. And they are reminiscent of fluttering drapes or curtains in the wind. There is also a violet and a crimson trim at the bottom and top ends. Sometimes the hues are blended together and braided into one another. New beams of light streaming down from space cause the curtains to vanish and reappear.

Joel looks up to find you both whispering and giggling, you are pointing up at the sky and moving excitedly as you explained the glow from the stars and the infinite rays of light creating waves in the cold midnight sky. He watches Ellie lean her head on your shoulder and you gently rub her back, eventually giving her a light squeeze as a form of a side hug. He brings his fingers to his lips, and a shrill attention-grabbing pierces through the air, both of you swiftly turn your attention to Joel who says, “Come down from there. You’re both gonna break your necks.”

You and Ellie make your way down the high rock, and both of you walk to Joel who was sipping from his flask. Ellie curiously asks Joel, “Ahh… Can I have some?” He shakes his head at her, “No.” The fourteen-year-old whines, “What? Just to warm up. C’mon.” Joel looks at you, and you were surprised he wanted your input or permission. You simply nodded, letting him give the metal flask to Ellie which she receives with a bright smile, she raises it in thanks and takes a large sip. Her face twists into a sour expression, her eyes shut for a brief moment while her eyebrows meet in the middle, “Yep… still gross.” Ellie hands it back to Joel and he asks if you want some to which you respond with a shake of your head. She lets out a little cough and Joel quietly sips from his flask.

“So, I’ve been thinking. Let’s say we find the Fireflies, it all works, they draw my blood and put it through some of their fancy machines and make a cure.” Ellie says and you watch Joel shift his eyes a bit, trying to figure out where this is heading, “Okay?” Ellie raises her eyebrows as she asks aloud, “Then what? Like, what do we do?” Joel raises his defenses, trying to keep the invisible bricks intact steady, “Oh, it’s ‘we’?” Unintentionally you sigh loudly in exasperation, looking at Joel with your eyelids heavy, you nervously lick the bottom of your lip and cling to your patience as it slowly slips through your fingers like sand. Ellie also sighs and reforms her question, “Okay, fine. Whatever. You. Her. You both can do anything you want. Where are you going? What are you doing?”

Joel clears his throat, “It’s never been an option. Maybe… an old farmhouse, some land… a ranch.” Ellie encourages him to continue, “Cool. What kind?” He replies while he smugly looks at Ellie “Sheep. I would raise sheep. They’re quiet… do what they’re told.” Ellie rolls her eyes and nods, “Yeah, yeah. Okay. So, just you and a buncha sheep. Romantic.” You smile at the thought of him living a domesticated life, no more danger or violence, just simple and safe. Joel hesitates a little before asking Ellie, “And what about you? Where are you gonna go?”

She raises her head high, looking up at the full midnight moon glimmering bright along with the twinkling stars, “It’s probably cause I grew up in the QZ. Behind you, there’s ocean, and ahead of you, there’s a wall. Nowhere else to look but up. I read everything I could in the school library. Neil Armstrong, Buzz Aldrin, Jim Lovell. But you know who my favorite is?” You create creases beneath your eyes as you smile widely, having a pretty good guess as to who. You and Joel say the same thing at the same time, “Sally Ride.” Ellie grins, “Sally fuckin’ Ride! Best astronaut name ever. How about you Birdie?” You blink twice, “What?” She raises an eyebrow, “What are you gonna do when after I save the world? Are you gonna try to go back to your world or whatever?”

You've trusted and refused every compass you've followed, and the same is true of an ever-changing concept of right. You wrap your arms around your middle, and your shoulders rise and fall as you breathe, “Um… I actually haven’t thought about that. I don’t know.” She looks at you with confusion and questions “Don’t you want to go back home?” Her inquiry causes you to shrink into yourself a little more, not wanting to answer, craving to distance yourself from Joel and Ellie’s gaze. You swallow nervously and look down at your worn-out boots, “I… Maybe. It might take a long time before I could figure out something. But to be honest Ellie, I never felt… at home there. So many things that I had before, but they don't matter to me now.”

Then it becomes quiet for a bit, you watch Ellie blink a couple of times, the crackling bright glow of the orange fire illuminating on side of her face, as she begins to question the future before her, she couldn’t help but wonder, “It’ll work, right? The vaccine?” Joel looks down unsure, “It’s a little late to start wonderin’.”

“I tried, with Sam,” Ellie says as she doesn’t bring her eyes to either of you, your eyes soften at her admittance, none of you have talked about what had happened, not wanting to dwell on the past too much, but to hear her finally bring it up giving you a sense of pride, for her to have the courage to speak about something so traumatic. Joel continued the conversation by asking her what she meant, “Tried what?” She still couldn’t bring herself to look at either of you, choosing to gaze into the campfire, “I knew he was infected. I rubbed some of my blood into his bite. I know, I know, it was stupid. But I… I wanted to save him.” Joel softly says, the wind carrying his words into the night, “Well, I reckon it’s a lot more complicated than that. Marlene, she’s a lotta things, but… she’s no fool. If she says they can do it, they can do it.” Ellie doesn’t say anything as she nods and he takes a large gulp from his flask, throwing his head back as he does.

The fire crackles loudly, but Ellie’s voice could be heard as she asked, “You wanna take first watch or second?” Joel grunts out, “I’ll do both. Get some sleep.” You opened your mouth to dispute him, saying that you could do the first watch but he doesn’t let you get a single syllable in as he narrows his eyes at you, “No.” You huff in annoyance and say nothing. You and Ellie get up to go deeper into the cave as Joel says to the both of you while grabbing his rifle, “Dream of… going home to sheep ranches on the moon.” Ellie gives him another nod, “I will.”

WYOMING WILDERNESS, CAVE – EARLY MORNING

The snow forest feels to the rest of the world like a gift waiting to be opened. Upon the ascent of the daylight, the wilderness is so bitter cold. It exudes a clean aura that invites the soul to pause for a minute and allow the sight to permeate the soul. You live in the moment, the past is always gone, and each day is something new, a stepping stone into a future you dream of even in the cold. The last of the morning stars were blinking out tragically above you. They glowed like bling-silver grains of sand in the early sky. It was a sight to see as their bejeweled splendor faded into nothingness. A ghostly, orb-white winter moon lingered there, eerily similar to a faint strobe light. A halo of brilliant golden encircled its waning brilliance. The sky around it was a vast sheet of grate-grey, with a plum-purple hue near the horizon.

You woke up a bit earlier than usual, and you found Joel passed out, laying on his side and using his jacket as a pillow. You could hear the birds squawking from above the trees, and see the campfire had dimmed. Quietly, you pushed yourself up and grabbed the rifle he had left beside him. You did the usual checks to ensure the safety of everyone, and to see if there were any tracks or unwanted animals lurking around. So far, luckily, you three were safe for the time being.

You made your way back to the cave, finding Ellie alert and awake. She looks at Joel and then back at you, and you raise your finger to your lips, indicating that she should let Joel rest and be quiet. The young girl nods in understanding, silently walking towards you, the both of you taking watch. You let Ellie practice what Joel had taught her and let her hold the rifle in the meantime. And she did everything perfectly.

As time passed and the sun began to rise from the east, you hear Joel mumble in his sleep. You tuned your ears to his whimpers and mumbling, catching the words, “Supposed to be me… Supposed to…” You frown in understanding and worry, you had your fair share of nightmares fueled by guilt. Joel startles awake, gasping for air as he pushes himself up frantically searching for his rifle, only to find you and Ellie standing guard. Ellie couldn’t help herself as she quips, “Still mumbling in your sleep. Birdie and I woke up early. You were passed out, so we both took second watch.”

Joel’s fury sprang to life as he stood up, “You gotta wake me up if that happens. Both of you can’t do things like this.” You felt a flash of irritation as you say to him, “But we can… ‘cause we just did.” He’s quiet for a moment, caught off guard by your reaction, then he speaks, “I’m responsible for both of you, okay?” Ellie is quick to throw back, “Then don’t fall asleep.” She began to recount detail and instruction Joel had given her before when he taught her while you proudly smirk at him, “What can I say, man? I’m a natural.” Joel grouchily nods, “Uh-huh.” And gestures to her to give him back the rifle, he nods at her in approval this time, “You wake me up next time.” Ellie rolls her eyes and smiles sarcastically, “Yes, sir. But you should know that Birdie woke up before me.”

Your eyes widen at her, “Ellie, don’t throw me under the bus!” She chuckles at you as Joel gives you a pointed look and you raise your eyebrows at him, daring him to try and argue, instead he just shakes his head, “Let’s get goin’.”

The cold air stung your cheeks and you pulled your scarf up closer to your face. As you looked around you took notice of the white blanket of snow covering the trees, ground, and mountains. The smell of damp pine trees made the air feel fresh and clean. The world around you was frozen in a glaring white quiet. Nothing made a sound, nothing moved, nothing sang. Winter's slavering teeth have vanished. Its piercing winds had stripped the trees of their final leaves, leaving them naked and brooding in a harsh world. They were groaning beneath the weight of the snow, encased in their medical coats. A great limb would occasionally groan, shatter, and collapse. It sounded like an explosion went off in the jungle. Apart from that, the woodland was engulfed in an eerie stillness. There was no morning chorus, sound symphony, or avian orchestra. The entire globe was encased in a dome of quiet. Winter's lethal grasp has strangled and suffocated all life on the planet. Snowflakes fluttered down on the three of you, sylph-like in their airy quiet. They glinted like crushed diamond dust as they landed. A shimmering winter scape of white and silver.

The sudden gunshot disrupted the peace of the forest, and the startled geese began to honk and fly off into the distance, Joel waits for a bit to ensure it was safe to cross the bridge, Ellie observes, waiting for something to happen, but nothing does, “The River of Death. Still no people.” Joel grumbles out, “Fine.” Then proceeds to stand up, and walk to the entrance of the bridge as you and Ellie closely follow him from behind.

As you continue to make your way across the bridge, Ellie tries to whistle like Joel, however, no high pitch sound comes out, just puffs of air. Joel turns around in confusion, and Ellie’s reply is muffled by her fingers, “I’m learning how to whistle.” And Joel looks at her incredulously, “You don’t know how to whistle?” She retorts, “Does it sound like I know how to whistle?” He says the obvious, “No.” You laugh, letting yourself enjoy the little moments of peace with the two. “Seriously, though, how the fuck do you do that?” Ellie asks walking a little bit ahead and you walking side-by-side with Joel, he harrumphs, “Talent.” And you lightly smack his arm at his response, and you swore you saw him give you a small smile, Ellie mutters, “Whatever. You should teach me how to hunt.”

“Huh.” Joel states, and Ellie mocks him, “‘Huh’. Like. ‘She’s a girl. She can’t handle it.’” Joel speaks as he trudges through the snow, “You can handle the shootin’. Not so sure about the dressin’.” Ellie sighs, “What’s the dressin’?” You and Joel walk a little bit past her and he replies, “The part where you take the guts out.” And your nose scrunches up at the thought while Ellie says, “Oh, yeah. Why do they call it dressing? It’s like you should call it undressing ‘cause it is. It’s like… undressing from the inside.” She paused for a bit to catch her breath before saying, “Still interested, though.”

The sound of water rushing fills your ears as you waddled through the snow, stumbling upon a large structure. Dams were mechanical temples that harnessed the victorious powers of water, power, and terrestrial fertility for human advantage. “Dam.” Ellie said, and you rolled your eyes in amusement while Joel tells her, “You’re no Will Livingston.” She quickly throws back at him, “Yeah, yeah, but who is? So that made electricity?” Referencing the Dam in front of them, Joel mutters, “Yeah. Don’t ask me. I don’t have a clue.” Ellie laughs, “You know, you could’ve just made something up. I would’ve believed you.” Joel answers, “Ask Birdie, she’s practically a walking encyclopedia.”

“I don’t know whether to be offended or amazed at the fact you know what an encyclopedia is.” You quip at him with a smirk and his lip quirks up in a small smirk at you, and his eyes twinkle with mischief and desire as his pupils slightly darken, “Smartass.” You winked at him, “You like it.”

“Damn right.” He said with his eyes unwavering from yours, and you felt every atom in your body spark to life. Joel’s heavy breathing stirred the tiny hairs on your neck, sending a shiver into every cell of your body. Ellie disrupted you both as she makes a disgusted groan, “If the two of you are done flirting can we please keep moving?” The heat of embarrassment rushed into your face, leaving you speechless as you decide to break away from his stare and keep marching forward.

“Look at that river. It’s crazy blue.” Ellie said then was immediately quiet after, somewhere between then and now irony slipped its way into her vocabulary, laughter became an anecdote for guilt, sacrifice grew to be a band name for shame and unnecessary death became a nightmare that rode her piggyback. At this point, the thought suddenly struck her, “Hey, Joel, Birdie… what if this is the River of Death?”

Joel grabs the map from his jacket pocket and unfolds it, checking to see if Ellie was right. The cold wind harshly bit into your skin as you three stared at the crystal blue river. At first, you couldn’t see them, but you could hear them—the snapping of twigs, the crunch of snow, and the clopping sound of horse hoofs. There were more than one, more than three, and they were closing in. Joel tried to grab you and Ellie to run, but they were too quick, and organized, and had you surrounded in seconds with their guns and rifles pointed at you. “Get behind me,” Joel said, slightly pushing both of you behind his tall frame. You all raised your hands up, and showed no sign of aggression, Joel shouts, “We ain’t lookin’ for any trouble. We’re just passin’ through.”

“Drop the gun,” the harsh voice ordered in front of you, Joel does as he’s told and so do you. “Both of you… take five steps back.” the man says, and Joel tries to reason with him, “How ‘bout we just talk this through?” And the unknown man unrelentingly replies, “How ‘bout you shut the fuck up?” Joel's shoulders tense, “Okay, easy.” He turns to both of you, Ellie has her eyes wide open and mouth slightly parted, her hands slightly quivering and you trying to steady your breathing, “You’ll both be okay.”

You follow the orders given to you and take five steps back and you hear the man ask, “You been near Infected?” And Joel replies, “There’s no Infected out here.” He doesn’t buy it one bit and retorts, “The hell there ain’t.” He whistles and you hear a short, abrupt vocalization, relatively loud and high-pitched, changes in frequency, the bark of an excited dog, “Last chance for a bullet. If you’ve been infected, he will smell it, and he will rip you up.”

The black large dog continues to bark and its handler removes his leash, he prances over to Joel, sniffing him up and down, jumps up to place his paws on his stomach, looks at him then whines, not finding any indication of the virus. The dog walks back over to his handler for a treat while Joel’s Texan accent becomes heavy, “Like I said… we’ll just move on.” The man still has his rifle pointed at you as he sits atop his horse, he nods over in your and Ellie’s direction, “Now both of them.”

Your heart drops, and you hear Ellie’s breathing become shaky. The flip in your stomach takes over all of your senses, you are frozen and unmoving as you watch the dog crouch lowly and growl at you and Ellie. Joel turns back to glance at you both and you’re worriedly looking at him. He turns around, not bringing himself to watch, the world becomes quiet, the silent ringing returns, and his lungs are clawing for air. It brings him back to that moment when the world took her away, his Sarah, the powerlessness and helplessness feeling that had followed him over the past twenty years. The weight of the world was placed on his shoulders that faithful day.

The sound of a high-pitched bark brings him back to the present, he hears you and Ellie giggle and turns to find you and her completely fine, happily rubbing and petting the dog as the creature licks and wags its tail. The man whistles and the dog is called away, you and Ellie stand up from the snow and hear the leader say, “You just bought yourself ten more seconds. What are you doin’ out here?” Joel quickly replies, “I’m just lookin’ for my brother. That’s all, nothin’ more.” A beautiful woman, whose skin was as rich and deep as any stately home mahogany, exclaims, “Ho!” And walks her horse forward, “What’s your name?” He answers breathlessly, “Joel.” And his name became the key, the password, and the answer, for them to escort you into their town.

You three were given and allowed to ride your own horses, the cold wind rushing past me. The sun’s rays of light are covered by the darkness of the clouds. Hooves, galloping along the plush white snow, the loud clopping and crunch fill your ears as you hold onto the reins. In the distance, you see a large wooden wall with a giant gate, men and women stationed on top, ready to shoot any intruders. One of the men raises a red bandana, a signal to one of the guards on watch.

The large gate opens for all of you, the horses begin to trot at a normal pace as you take in the sight of Jackson. Underneath you are fluffy, cold snow. The sounds of slush fill your ears. You watch as the misty fog escapes your mouth anytime you take a breath. Every time you inhale a frigid prickle enters your lungs and every time you exhale the heat from your breath warms your lips. Around you are naked trees covered in powder-white snow, glistening in the daylight. The town is neatly arranged, and it felt comfortable and safe. You spot the Tipsy Bison on the right, a location you recognized, then bring your eyes to observe the people around you. A thriving and collaborative community, stable enough to provide and care for the elderly and children.

You continue on forward, spotting Tommy on top of the scaffolding, helping with construction work. You angle your head to look at Joel as he shouts at the top of his lungs, “Tommy!” His brother stops what he’s doing to look at Joel, then he proceeds to run down the steps leading up to the scaffolding, Joel urgently dismounts from his horse, and the people around town watch as the two brothers reunite, a large impactful hug from the both of them, secure and firm. Their shoulders move up and down as the two laugh loudly, finally, all of the pieces align and the balance is clearly defined, he sighs and settles down for the first time.

Tommy smiles as he asks his older brother, “What the fuck are you doin’ here?” Joel looks at you and Ellie for a second before back to Tommy, replying, “I came here to save you.” Joel begins to laugh again, his chuckle a melody you’ve rarely heard before, a sound you keep in your back pocket just in case.

You bring your gaze to Ellie, whose expression is mixed and jealous, sensing that she’s now a bit less important in Joel’s life. You look back at the two brothers, turning down the volume of your heart, the massive table of countless dominos, all lined up and weaving in and out of each other, every relationship and decision in every piece of domino, subconsciously shrinking the row of dominos the best you can. Eliminating your opinions or wants and desires, convincing yourself that this will be simple by just focusing on the needs of everyone else but yourself. The only form of control you’ve had looks like empathy to understand all sides.

MESS HALL, JACKSON COUNTY, WYOMING – AFTERNOON

The mess hall was large, warm, and inviting. The indistinct chatter fills the giant wooden cabin, lightbulbs twinkling from above, and dining tables lined up neatly. Ellie was sat in between you and Joel, she is scarfing down her food, eagerly eating everything that was on her plate and so was Joel. You were meekly eating, trying to not draw attention to yourself, as you quietly chewed on your potatoes. “There’s more if you need it.” And you soon come to realize that this must be Maria, the way Tommy’s body language is drawn and pulled close to her, you smile when you hear Joel reply politely, “Thank you, ma’am.” And you also offer your thanks to her and she nods in your direction in acknowledgment. Joel cuts into his food as he says, “It’s been a while since we’ve had a proper meal.” Ellie pipes in, “Actually, I don’t think I’ve ever had a proper meal. This is fuckin’ amazing.” You wince in second-hand embarrassment and so does Joel, he turns to Maria, “Sorry. Ellie… let’s mind our manners.” Tommy smirks knowingly. At one moment, another girl furtively looks at Ellie, until Ellie loudly says “What?!” and scares her off. Joel’s lips turn down and his eyebrows furrow in confusion, “What’s wrong with you?” Ellie doesn’t relent, “What about her manners?”

“She was just curious. Kids around here don’t usually look or talk like you.” Maria points out and Ellie nods, “Right… well, maybe I’ll teach them. And I want my gun back.” Maria shakes her head, “They also aren’t armed.” The young brave girl glares at her in response, Tommy decides to step in, “You know what? Uh… I think maybe ya’ll got a little off on the wrong foot.” Ellie raises her tone and points out, “She was gonna have our guys kill us.” Joel gives her a pointed look, an indication for her to stop being disrespectful but Tommy calmly responds, “Well, we gotta be real careful about who we let in this place. But it’s all bark. We’re just trying to scare off those who might wanna try us is all.” Ellie nonchalantly says, “Well you got a couple of ninety-year-olds who shitting themselves out there.” You and Joel chastise her quickly, “Ellie.” But she doesn’t care, “They say that you leave dead bodies around?” Maria doesn’t deny the ugly truth, “Those are the people who tried us.” Tommy adds, “A bad reputation doesn’t mean you’re bad.” Maria narrows her eyes at Joel as she comments, “Not always, at least.” You feel your anger flare up from your chest as you grip your knife tighter, glaring at Maria for suggesting such a thing.

Joel swallows down his food and his shame, “Ma’am… we’re grateful for your hospitality and all. But it’d be nice to have a moment here, maybe just for family.” You place an elbow on the table, using your hand to hide your face in embarrassment as you squirm in your chair, you hear Tommy clear his throat, “Well um…” You peek past your hand and watch him grab Maria’s hand, spotting the wedding band on his left ring finger, “Maria is family, actually.” Ellie blinks in surprise as she says, “Oh, shit! Congrats.” You bring your eyes to Joel’s unmoving figure, frozen in shock from the sudden news as his breathing becomes unsteady, Ellie softly whispers to him, “Joel, say congrats.” The all-too-familiar cold tone is unmistakable as he grits his teeth to say, “Congrats.” There’s an awkward silence between the two parties, and you take a large gulp of your water and Tommy offers, “How ‘bout a tour.” You nod as you’re the first one to get up from your chair, not liking the possibility of conflict between the two brothers, “Yes, please.”

JACKSON, WYOMING – AFTERNOON

The town had a large plaza, and a giant vibrant Christmas tree in the center, Maria spoke as she walked, and the rest of you followed, “We settled here about seven years ago. Just a handful of us back then.” She points out a section of the town, “That section was already a gated community, so we built the rest of the wall out from there. Stopped most of the raiding parties, but we still find pockets of them.” Joel warily looks around, “And you said Infected?” Tommy nods, “Yeah, but usually in smaller colonies, wandered off from the cities. All this open country out there… it’s a turkey shoot. I still got my 700, but I found a variable power scope. Sub MOA. Can headshot those fuckers from half a mile out.”

“Can you teach me how?” Ellie asks and Joel is quick to respond for him, “No, he can’t. How do you keep this place quiet?” Maria replies, “Carefully. Being in the middle of nowhere helps. Not advertising what we have, staying off the radio.” Joel stares at his brother and Tommy shrinks away from his pointed look, you listen to Maria as she explains the purpose of each building, “House of worship, multifaith. School. Laundry. Old bank works as a jail, not that we’ve needed it.” Joel looks to one of the electric poles, “And you draw power from the dam?” Maria confirms his suspicion, nodding, “Got that workin’ a couple years ago. After that, sewage, plumbing, water heaters… lights.” Ellie shakes her head, seemingly impressed, “This place actually fuckin’ works.”

The group makes their way to the farm, and a herd of sheep passes by, and Ellie points it out as she smiles at him, “Hey, Joel, check it. Baa.” Ellie playfully swings her arms back and forth as she asks Maria, “Are you, like, in charge?” She looks at Tommy for a bit before replying, “No one person’s in charge. I’m on the council. Democratically elected, serving three hundred people, including children. Everyone pitches in. We rotate patrols, food prep, repairs, hunting, harvesting.” Tommy picks off where she left off, “Everything you see in our town… greenhouses, livestock, all shared. Collective ownership,” to which Joel replies, "So, uh, communism." Tommy's knee-jerk reaction is, "Nah. Nah, it ain't like that." His discomfort with the term pulls from over a century of distortion of the fundamental principles of communism. “It is that, literally. This is a commune. We're communists," Maria states modestly, to which Tommy’s discomfort at the thought causes him to stagger a bit, to which you offer, “I can try and explain it later.” Tommy nods in thanks and you give him a reassuring smile.

“No way!” Ellie exclaims as she makes her way to the stables, Maria trails behind her and you follow the two ladies, “That’s our newest one. Couple months old. You wanna pet her?” Ellie’s smile is as bright as the sun and her teeth as white as the snow beneath you, wide and happy, “Yeah, what’s her name?” Ellie asks to which Maria replies, “Shimmer.” Your smile falters a bit, recognizing the name from the second game, but you shake it off, not wanting to keep looking into the future. “Shimmer you’re so beautiful,” Ellie says as she pets the pony gently, completely enamored by her beauty and gentle grace. Maria turns to Tommy and discusses the possible sleeping arrangement, “Well, I’m sure they’d like a shower, some new clothes. We can put them in the empty house across the street from us.” Her husband nods in agreement, “Yeah. It’s a decent place. Pretty much untouched since the ‘03, but it’s got the heat goin’ in it. Could do worse.” Ellie carelessly remarks, “Oh, trust me, we have been.”

Joel has his eyes narrowed and annoyed, “We’ve been doin’ fine.” You get the slight feeling he’s being defensive, and Maria looks at you and Ellie, and tells her husband, “Well I’ll take her and Ellie over there if you two wanna catch up.” Tommy then looks to his older brother for approval and Joel nods, “Yeah. Okay.” You and Ellie whip your head to face Joel, slightly unnerved and fearful of the unknown, and potentially Joel pushing you both away. “Joel.” Ellie says and he brushes her off as he walks away, “You’ll be fine.” Maria asks the both of you, “Shall we?” And having no choice but to follow her you both nod, “Uh, yeah.”

THE RANCH, MASTER BEDROOM

JACKSON, WYOMING – AFTERNOON

The warm hot shower soothes your skin as you wash off the grime and dirt of the last few months. At some point, you had decided to sit down in the bathtub of the shower, letting the water hit your skin freely, your eyes distant and gaze unsteady as you watch the steam of the shower move to the light. You hug your knees close to your chest, rest your chin on your knees, and finally let yourself go.

The haze takes over your vision, a sculpture of water and unsettled dust, and your exhausted mind only wants to be carried home. So you fight with the concept of grace while attempting to hold everything in place. You were so full of life that you could barely hold it in. You were amateurs at war, strangers to suffering. Your questions ricochet like broken satellites. How did your bodies, born to heal, become so prone to die? Your nights have grown so long and now you beg for sound advice, time has been ruthless and unkind, every turn in the corner of the maze only to be faced with a dead end, the trapdoors you couldn’t see, and the lives that were lost to your journey to Jackson. You felt so vulnerable and fragile, the fact that the foundation of society was shaken to its core due to the pandemic, governments, families, and lives as you know them, will never be the same again. As life replayed, you hear the voice in the back of your mind proclaim, to let the brokenness be felt until you reach the other side.

The sting in your eyes as the tears escape from your eyes, allows for the cold embrace of the depression you’ve kept hidden and at bay for so long. Sometimes you pretend you are evergreen and keep your cards close to your chest. But this time you allow yourself the reprieve, as you quietly sob into your hands and gasp for air now and then, letting every little fracture of you shatter out loud. Wondering if your messes mattered and if all the chaos counted as you felt empty-handed. You had set sail along the universe's ocean of the unknown with cheap wood and tried to patch up every leak that you could until the blame grew too heavy.

You reflected on the world that you were unintentionally placed in, presenting the world through a different lens, a world that turned hostile and dangerous. But a story that explored how nevertheless you can still find love and meaning, the longing for human connections, and how willing you are to sacrifice everything to safeguard the people you love.

You hadn’t planned on it, the greater weight of the truth settling inside of you. Fundamental resilience and a built-in resistance, and against your judgment, prevent you from completely surrendering yourself from truly giving up on being human. You open your eyes and slowly rise to your feet, placing your palm on the wall, you blink and try to look past the undefined and fragile promise at the light at the end of the tunnel. You nod, shakily you breathe, and whisper to no one in particular, “I guess that’s how it goes.”

After the mental breakdown in the shower, you stepped out of the bathroom fresh and felt a little bit lighter. You lift your chin a little higher and open your eyes a little wider despite the puffiness in your eyes. You are wrapped in a towel, and as you make your way to the foot of the bed, you find fresh clean clothes to wear and a menstrual cup. You smile at the thoughtful gift and find a note, that reads ‘I’m just across the street. Come by when you’re done.’

You get dressed and make your way down the hall to Ellie’s room, you knock on her door and call for her, “Ellie? You there?” When no reply came, you slowly opened the door to find her gone and after investigating a little bit, you see a similar note from Maria. You figured she had already gone over. You leave her room and walk across the street to Maria’s house, knocking on the door and Ellie opening the door for you. You smile at her as you walk inside, appreciating the warmth already provided by the fireplace.

You take a good look at the living room, yellow curtains by the window, a messy coffee table with an unsolved crossword, and a large cozy couch facing the fireplace as it crackles and roars. Your eyes catch the small blackboard sitting on top of the fireplace with two candles on each side. Ellie walks over to it and you follow closely behind her as she stares up at the two names. Kevin and Sarah, with the dates, that they were born and taken away too soon from this world.

You let out an uneven exhale and feel your frown deepen, as the flashbacks of Joel’s life come back to you in a blur. The scream for mercy, watching him tear apart with each cry and wail from his hoarse voice. The day the world ended was the same day his world ended. Something broken that cannot be fixed. You both turn your heads to the sound of the back door opening, Maria enters bringing the cold wind with her until she closes the door behind her, “Oh, good. Just traded for these two. Go ahead, try it on.” She hands Ellie a deep purple long coat while yours is A sophisticated medium gray with the barest hint of violet. The young girl comments as she wears her purple puffer coat, “It’s, uh, super fuckin’ purple.” You bend down a little to help Ellie with her coat, fixing the collar and the lining, Maria nods, “Eggplant. It fits?” Ellie replies, “Yeah.” Maria continues to fuss over her as you put on your coat, “Shoes aren’t too big?” She answers, “Uh, no. Where’s our other stuff?” Maria lifts her shoulders, “Rag pile. Did you both get the thing I left you?” You merely nod while Ellie bluntly replies, “Yeah. Weirdest gift ever.” Maria nods in agreement but says, “But useful. Who’s been cutting your hair?”

“Uh, world-class salons,” Ellie says plainly and it earns a laugh from you and Maria, “Let me get my scissors.” Ellie’s mouth opens to protest but Maria doesn’t let her argue, “Trim. That’s all. Just the ends, I promise. And her too, she’ll go first so you can see that you have nothing to worry about.” Referring to you as she walks to the kitchen. You ruffle Ellie’s hair and whisper to her, “Just let her,” to which she sighs and takes a seat on one of the dining table chairs.

The trim was much needed. Maria had cut your hair in the style you wanted with such precision and skill. You happily thanked her with a polite smile, sat down on one of the other chairs, and let Ellie go next, of course, Ellie being the curious kid she is, begins to interrogate Maria, “So, this was, like, your job back then or something?” The sharp snips of scissors fill the silence for a bit before she answers, “No, I was an Assitant District Attorney out of Omaha, Nebraska. I put the bad guys in jail. I always liked doing hair though. Maybe it was a mom thing.”

“Damn, that’s pretty impressive.” You said and she gives you her thanks and asks, “What did you do for work?” Your smile falters, “Um, I used to be a researcher, a Quantum physicist.” The quiet was nice for a moment before she comments, “You both were looking at the little memorial Tommy made?” Ellie answers for the both of you, “Uh, yeah.” She stumbles on her words, “I’m- I’m sorry about your kids.” Your nails dig into your palm and listen to Maria reply, “It’s okay. And kid. Just Kevin. Sarah was Joel’s daughter.”The heavy silence that follows tells Maria that Ellie didn’t know that before, and you find it harder to breathe, “Oh, maybe I shouldn’t have said anything.”

“No, it’s okay. I guess that explains him a little,” Ellie says and she brings her eyes to you, “Did you know?” You squirm, the feeling of deja vu from when you first heard those words from Joel, the accusatory glance, and the betrayal in her eyes. “Yes,” You said and she scoffs at you, “Why? Why didn’t you say anything?” You pull back and raise your eyebrows at her, “You and I both know that was never my story to tell or share. No amount of knowledge will ever excuse the fact that I can never talk about what happened without Joel’s explicit consent.” Ellie resigns from her lashing out and nods at you with understanding, and you simply sighed. Maria chimes in, “Look, I’m not gonna ask you what you both are doing with him.”

“Good.” You and Ellie say at the same time, quickly protective of Joel but Maria continues with her statement, “But there are clearly things you both don’t know about Joel.” You glare at Maria while the teen remains typically testy, “Oh, like how he used to kill people? We know about that.” Ellie rebukes with vigor and impresses Maria with it somewhat, “So then you understand my concern.” Ellie’s anger flares, “He doesn’t do that anymore.” And Maria is quick to question, “He stopped killing people?”

“Innocent ones. And Tommy did it, too. Are you worried about him?” she asks to which Maria’s lips form a thin line, “Tommy was following Joel. The way you both are.” Seemingly sees Joel as a bad influence, someone who pulls people into his orbit and leaves harm in his wake. “Well, maybe, we’re smarter than Tommy. No offense.” Ellie states and you sense distrust in Maria, “You are definitely smart. Both of you. You would have made a hell of a lawyer, Ellie.” The woman says as she puts away her scissors and stands in front of you and Ellie, “There’s a whole lot you’re not telling me.” None of you answer, to which Maria nods, “Good. Therein lies the point. Be careful who you put your faith in,” she warns you and Ellie. “The only people who can betray us… are the ones we trust.” Ellie clearly resents the advice and Maria’s distrust of Joel, perhaps because she senses there’s a good reason for it and none of you want to admit it.

“You understand?” Maria asks and you both hum in acknowledgment. “Now come on.” She says as she walks to remove the towel around Ellie’s shoulders, “Grab your super fuckin’ eggplant coat.” You allow yourself to laugh at the callback and get up from your own seat, shuffling to put on your gray coat to which you hear Ellie ask, “Where are we going?” Maria smiles, “The movies.” Ellie sighs and ties her hair back, while you say, “I’m actually gonna go for a walk. Get familiar with the surroundings. You okay to go by yourself, Ellie?” The brave teen nods, “Mhm. I’ll see you back at the house.”

“Tell me what you think of the movies later, okay?” You say and she smiles and agrees, “Okay.” You tuck your hands in the pockets of your coat, yelling a thank you and goodbye to Maria as you headed outside to the cold winter of Jackson.

MAIN STREET

JACKSON, WYOMING – SUNSET

You tried your best to help around as much as you could with the stables and the children, doing some work to pass the time. The clouds collected again around sunset, bringing an earlier night, and the snow began to fall straight and slowly from a sky devoid of wind, in a gentle universal dispersion more perplexing than the morning's blasts. It appeared to be a part of the growing darkness, the cold night itself falling on you layer by layer.

The amber glow of the string lights, the burn barrels doing their best to keep parts of the area warm, the steam following the wind but the bright glow of the fire emitting from inside shine through. Most people at this hour have already decided to go to the dining hall to watch the rest of the movie, but you continued to wander around the empty main street of Jackson.

The world is an outline of shapes you used to know, hidden in plain sight. The drapes suddenly pulled back slowly, as though pulling a ribbon. You've been distracted, but you're no longer trapped in the static. Despite the fact that your hands are prone to trial and error, you cross your fingers for anything to hold. Here in the shadows of letting go, you can't help but wish for a brighter future. You spot Ellie from a distance, her figure crouched down as she eavesdrops through the door of a nearby workshop. You tilt your head and quietly walk towards her, to which she still turns her head to you, lifting her finger on her lips indicating to be quiet. You decide to follow her request and crouch next to her, hearing Tommy and Joel quietly conversing with each other.

Joel started, “It was Marlene. She hired us to smuggle her to some Fireflies. It went bad. Tess got bit. She made me swear to take the kid. It was her dyin’ wish. What the hell was I supposed to do? We made it as far as K.C., and then… You know she saved my life there… from another kid. Birdie got hurt too… Five years ago, I would’ve destroyed him. But she had to shoot him to save me. Fourteen years old. Because I was too slow and too fuckin’ deaf to hear him comin’.” You shudder at the reminder and the two of you listened as Joel broke, bit by bit, his voice started to quiver, “And Birdie had to protect Ellie 'cause I asked her to… and she didn’t even have the experience or skill that I had… I saw… I saw a man kill his own brother… to save her, while I just watched. And today I thought that dog was gonna tear both of ‘em apart because it smelled somethin’ on them.”

“And all I did was stand there. I couldn’t… move. I couldn’t think of anything to say. I just… I was so afraid.” Joel’s breathing was ragged as he spoke, his mind racing with worst-case scenarios, “You think I can handle things, but… I’m not who I was. I’m weak.” He believes he bears little resemblance to the man he once was or could become. No action hero, he admits to being far less capable of recognizing and reacting to threats than he used to be, and to sometimes being paralyzed by fear. You slowly start to feel your eyes sting again as you hear the tremble in his voice, the brokenness you’re all too familiar with, “Lately, there are these moments where the fear comes up outta nowhere, and… my heart… feels like it’s stopped. And I have dreams. Every night.”

“What kinda dreams?” Tommy asks, and you listen to the triggered tripwire every time he breathes, the tremble in his voice gives you that he was beginning to cry, “I don’t know. I can’t remember. I just know that when I wake up… I’ve lost somethin’.” You allow your own tears to fall, covering your mouth to cover your whimpers as you listen to him admit, “I’m failin’ in my sleep. That’s all I do. It’s all I’ve ever done is fail them again and again.” Tommy states, “You want me to take them.” And Joel continues to cry as he says, “I’m just gonna get them killed. I know it. I have to leave them.” Tommy tries to call his name to calm him, “Joel.”

“I mean, it’s why you took off on me, right? To make up for the things we did?” Joel asks with a clear glaze in his eyes, he begs his younger brother, “Well, here’s your chance to bring your kid into a better world. You’re younger than me. You’re still strong. You said it yourself, you’ll come back. You have to take her. You have to give Birdie… that sweet, smark, and kind girl, a chance to live a life here. A normal life here. Please.”

You take Tommy’s silence as agreement and the tears fall from your cheeks as you try to muffle your cries. Joel breathes, “And you can’t tell anyone, not even Maria. Tommy, you’re the only one I trust. If anyone else sees those bites on her, on them both, what’s under their skin… they’ll shoot them. It’s the last thing I’ll ever ask of you. I swear.”

“I’ll take her out at dawn.” You hear Tommy say and Joel sigh of relief. You feel Ellie tug your coat sleeve, indicating you need to leave before they realized you had heard the entire conversation.

THE RANCH, MASTER BEDROOM

JACKSON, WYOMING – NIGHT

None of you spoke as the two of you walk into the night, heading back to the temporary house that they had provided. You opened the door for Ellie and she ran straight up to her room, while you walked up the steps to the master bedroom. You quietly shut your door sitting on the edge of the king-sized bed, you sniffed and try to will yourself to stop crying. You stared blankly at the floor as you swung your feet, patiently waiting and deciding what to do next.

The options you had were limited to figuring out how to get back to your previous observable universe or facing the truth about how you felt for Joel and your fondness for Ellie as if she were your own daughter. This meant admitting that you also needed to discuss what you wanted with Joel. To wake up and wage war with this gravity that has been holding you back for almost all of your life, the epiphany of finding so much worth fighting for, and either way all the lines of dominos will fall and cascade.

You were too in your head to hear the shouting from across the hall, the argument between Joel and Ellie, a crucial turning point in the central relationship. You hear the bits and pieces of their yelling and arguing, “You have no idea what loss is,” is a pretty awful thing for him to say. And in both, she tells him that everyone she’s ever cared about has either died or left her, “Everyone—fucking except for you. So don’t tell me that I would be safer with someone else because the truth is that I would just be more scared.” Joel’s painful response, “You’re right, you’re not my daughter, and I sure as hell ain’t your dad.” You flinch at that, “Now, come dawn… we’re goin’ our separate ways.” Then you hear the loud slamming of the door of Ellie’s room, and your own frown deepens, you feel your heart race, as if you feel the climb of the track of the rollercoaster, building you up and then taking you back. It’s a while before Joel decides to go to the bedroom, he had decided to sit in the living room to remember Sarah one last time before letting her go.

You anticipate Joel’s footsteps, the thud of each step, and hear your door open. Joel finds you sitting at the edge of the bed, hunched over, your hands shaking in your lap as you try and hold yourself together. The quiet dim glow of the yellow lamp by the bedside table illuminates your features. You don’t look at him as he calls your name, you choose to look at the floor, he tries again, softer, “Birdie…” You only blink in response, the only indication that you heard him at all, you hear him step a little closer to you, “How much did you hear?” In a barely audible response, you shakily whisper, “All of it.”

Joel began, “Birdie… it’s for the best if we–” You cut him off before he could even finish, sharply turning your head at him as you stood up, “Joel I can’t… I can’t keep doing this.” He feels breathless as he registers what you said, “What?” You blink back the tears and try to look him in the eye, a little more alive as you let the scale tip and feel all of it rushing through you like a restless river stream, you feel your chest expand as you breathe and say, “If you don’t want me… if you don’t feel anything for me. Just say it and tell me now and I’ll figure out how to get back home on my own. ‘Cause I can’t keep going like this… dancing around you and pretending I don’t have feelings for you.”

You shake your head, “I’ve spent my whole life asking and searching for the impossible and none of it made any sense to me… And then I… I found you and Ellie. For the first time, I felt whole.” Your hand clenches near your chest as you utter, “Was I just delusional or imagining things? ‘Cause all of this… push and pull is hurting me. Do you even want me?” Joel steps a little closer as he says, “Yes.” And you look up at him and take one step back, “Then… why? And don’t you fucking dare make it an age-gap excuse or I will kick you in the balls Miller.”

He stumbles over his words, “I’m afraid. I’m so, so, afraid Birdie. That I could fail to protect you, Sweet Girl. The light that you give, the kindness you’ve shown, I’m scared I might taint it. Take away something so good in this world. You deserve so much more than what I could give.” Your face pinches in frustration and tears fall down your face, your cheeks warm and eyes puffy from all the sobbing, “Don’t I get a say?” And he’s quick to tell you, “Of course you do.” You scoff and angrily wipe your eyes. You pause and take a good look at the man in front of you, it's a fire and a goddamn blaze in the dark and he started it, you say from across the room, “Then let me choose you, Joel. Please, please, don’t leave me here.” He’s quiet as he takes in your words, and you continue, it’s uncomfortable but right, you say, “I don’t care about what was written about in your history. In the end, I want more than the life that I choose, and I want it to be with you.”

The silence that fills the room is one of heaviness and anticipation. The churning fear that pours out of you, and the inheritance you did not seek or ask for. You watch as Joel breathes heavily at your confession, taking his time to process what you said and felt for him. Someone who he deemed no longer worthy of receiving love. Slowly, you show him who he is and who he could be, and try to initiate the heart, bringing himself to let it open up properly. All of a sudden, you changed his mind and pulled back the curtains a little at a time.

You were on a frequency, the perfect opposite of him. Though he never needed any proof to trust the heart that beats inside of you. He can't keep his head from spinning out of control, but he will try to breathe ‘til it becomes muscle memory. He’s only steady on his knees, but maybe with you, he’ll one day stand on his own two feet. To struggle gracefully and let the scaffolding inside of him be strong enough to hold his tired body up once more.

He licks his bottom lip out of nervousness, and directly looks you in the eye, “I want you, Birdie.” You feel the rush of heat through your body, and stutter, “W-What?” His gaze darkens as he looks at you with need and desire, seemingly made up his mind to just give in, to let himself want and need you. “I said, I want you Birdie. Will you be mine?” He takes a step closer to you and you stay frozen, eventually, he’s towering over your frame, his eyes so dark you can no longer see the honey-brown eyes you were familiar with. You can’t help it. You’re drawn in by the force and pressure of the tempest building in those damnable eyes. Your heart is loud as a drumline, the thumping noise and heat in your ears as you feel the magnetic pull into his warmth, you feel his breath against your lips as you whisper, “Yes.”

That’s all it took, and with slow deliberation looks at you up and down. His inspection seems to last for hours, though it must take only seconds. The air between you crackles, and you want to move toward him, to close the gap between you. But you stay rooted to the spot, waiting for him. He lingers for a moment on your lips before finally lifting his head to meet your eyes, and his lips meet yours. You didn’t grow up, we grew in, like ivy wrapping, molding each other into perfect yins and yangs. You kissed with mouths open, breathing his exhale into your inhale. You could have survived underwater or outer space, breathing only the breath you traded.

You felt his warm rough large hands bring one hand to your waist and the other to cup the side of your cheek as he kissed you. You felt the tickle of his facial hair on your cheek, and each breath and groan vibrated throughout your body. You wrapped your arms around his neck, running your fingers rhythmically through his salt-and-pepper hair. Happily sighing breathlessly as he continues to kiss you dizzy. Like a whiskey, you can feel it he hits so strong but tastes so sweet.

The rush and thrill consumed you, the slick wetness between your thighs and his hands moving to cup and grab at your ass causing you to gasp in pleasure, to which Joel decides to pull your bodies closer ‘til no space lies in between. His presence was too powerful, his scent too all-consuming. It crowded your lungs, filling them with clean earthiness and rich spices. When you were around him, it was easy to lose myself, no matter how upset you were.

When he carefully dropped himself to the ground, the movement was both proud and obedient. His breath brushed over your skin. “Do you want this?” His fingers ran down the back of your leg, leaving a path of heat in their wake. Your thoughts were jumbled, but you had enough sense to realize this wasn't about sex. It was all about being vulnerable. It was a landmark event disguised as insignificant and distilled into one phrase. “Yes.” That was both demand and submission, a groan and a gasp. Joel exhaled. He carried you to the plush bed in the center of the room, appreciating everything you could give him. Clothes were quickly removed, and he stripped you down to your barest form while he kept his boxers on, an evident hard-on showing but choosing to take care of you first.

His palms burned as they parted your thighs. He’d barely touched you, and you were already on fire. You tipped your head back, drowning in arousal, heat, and lust and the reverence of his touch as he kissed his way up your thigh. His stubble rasped against your skin and sent tiny shocks of pleasure down your spine. As he separated your thighs, his palms seared. He hadn't even touched you yet, but you were still immediately burning. As he nibbled his way up your thigh, you threw your head back, reveling in pleasure, heat, lust, and the devotion of his touch.

“I'm sorry I offended you…” A gentle kiss at the fine line where your thigh meets your leg and persistent heat. “For attempting to drive you away…” Your underwear was removed and tossed to the side as he softly stroked your clit with his tongue. When he dragged your clit into his lips and sucked, his abrasive words mingled with your scream. Your body arched away from the bed. He began to worship you with his lips, hands, and tongue as your hands dug into his hair and you could barely hang on. Joel was rigid but beckoning. Delicate but sinful. You felt a new rush of pure sensation with every movement. Your chest and the base of your spine are both under pressure at the same time. You were soaring high solely on passion and desire, out of breath. He backed away and lightly touched your delicate clit with his teeth. He inserted two fingers into you and plunged and curled them as you wilted carelessly.

Your body was familiar to him. Knew precisely what you wanted, how to operate it like a well-tuned guitar, and even what buttons to press and where to press them. He stroked your G-spot while simultaneously pressing his thumb into your clit. When Joel stood up, his chest heaving, the strain was dizzying as your orgasms ripped through you and your moans were still echoing in the air. He gently kissed your lips as he leaned forward on top of you, bracing his hands on each side of your head.

When you kissed him and cherished the flavor of the kiss, leisurely threads of need twisted inside you. Like desperation flavored with desire and soothed with compassion, robust and rich. You explored and licked the inside of his mouth as you panted. He moaned in hunger and want, “Birdie…” Your hands roamed, your hearts pounding in sync and your kisses growing in intensity until the heat became too much to bear.

He took off his boxers and you flipped both of you over with the help of gravity, and you gradually sank into him, taking him in, inch by inch until he was buried deep inside of you. Hitting deeper, and tasting sweeter. You rocked against Joel as his hands held onto your hips. A delightful pressure swelled inside of you, rising higher and higher until your head was distorted with lust. Sweat misted your skin. Moans filled the air. He was certainly straining to hold back, but he made no move to take control as you both experienced toe-curling orgasms at the same time. When Joel brought you down for a kiss, the second, smaller climax that the overpowering intimacy of the moment had triggered was still reverberating through you.

Your eyes are half-lidded as you pull away from the kiss and look at Joel, who’s heavily panting, breathless, and in awe of you. Joel flips you both over, and your back hits the mattress. He kisses you again, still, inside of you, you are still sensitive from your previous orgasm and cry out, “I can’t…” He pants and groans, “Yes you can sweet girl. You can do it. One more for me Birdie.” He’s hitting deeper and quicker as you try to squirm away from him but all he does is pin you down, grabbing your hands to lock them above your head, causing you to scream and cry out in pleasure. “You’re doing so well. You’re such a good girl.” He praises, and everything feels and sounds amplified, every thrust his hips make, the sounds of slick wet skin slapping together, each grunt and moan mixing and blending between you both finally brings you and him over the edge. He pulls out and paints your stomach while you clench and moan throughout your release.

He folds over atop you, his weight is a welcoming feeling, like a large protective blanket. You’re running your fingers through his hair as he continues to catch his breath and you hum happily, “You good cowboy or do you need a wheelchair?” He grunts, “Haven’t done that in a while. Cut the man some slack.” You laugh loudly and kiss the side of his forehead and he sighs with contentment. After a while, he rolls off of you, pulling you closer to his side, peppering your neck and cheek with kisses, “I’m goin’ to get a clean towel to clean us up.” You nod as he gets up, walks over to the bathroom, comes back with a clean rag, and wipes off the slick between your thighs and stomach.

He sets the cloth aside and climbs back in bed with you, tossing the blanket over both of your bodies, gripping your hips, and pulling you close. You kiss him again, just because you can and both of you are smiling widely at each other. You take a deep breath and close your eyes as you place your forehead on top of his, and Joel grumbles, “I should have pulled out earlier.” To which you yawn, “I have an IUD, it’ll expire in ten years.” Joel’s mouth opens, “You have a… oh right.” You laugh, “Yep. So I can keep riding you, my cowboy.” He smacks your ass and kisses you again as you yelp in surprise, “Keep talkin’ like that and we’re not gonna get any sleep tonight.” You roll your eyes in response but smile up at him.

The quiet between you two is comforting and allows you to rest your eyes, no awkwardness, just a blistering moment of peace. The night sky once ruled your imagination and you used to turn the dials with careful calculation. After a while, you thought you'd never find him and convinced yourself that you would never find him.

Then suddenly, he saw you through telescopes and calculations, the far was pulled so near. You opened your eyes to find yourself under his warm gaze, trying to memorize every feature as if you were constellations in the night sky. But the looming threat that hangs over you makes an appearance in the dark corner of the back of your mind, you whisper, “Joel.” He hums in acknowledgment and you continue, “You should give Ellie a choice. She also has every right to choose too.” He’s quiet for a moment before he sighs agreeing, “Yeah… Been thinking about it a while ago before you jumped my bones.” You smack his shoulder, “I did not!” To which he kisses you breathlessly, “I’ll give her the choice tomorrow.” You nod and cup the side of his face and he says to you so quietly, “We have a long way to go.” To which your eyes softened and kissed the tip of his nose, “Yes, but look how far we’ve come.”

THE RANCH, MASTER BEDROOM

JACKSON, WYOMING – EARLY MORNING

In the morning you don’t say it as both of you wake up to your bodies closely tangled with each other. His heavy arms are wrapped around your waist and his legs are inserted with yours as he kisses the back of your neck. Continuing to worship your entire being. You both had woken up early, sharing the water in the shower, to which you had both agreed you needed to save water, but it was just an excuse to keep touching each other.

By the time you both got out of the hot shower, you both got dressed and made your way to the stables. The chirping of birds brings you to smile at yourself as you brush your horse, preparing to leave. “You came here to say goodbye or something?” Ellie asks the both of you, causing you to look away from the task and tilt your head and smirk as Joel replies, “No. We came here to steal the horses and go.” To which Tommy says, “I woulda given you them.” And Joel replies with, “I know,” He sniffs and walks to Ellie before continuing, “Anyway… that was thirty minutes ago, and I guess… you deserve a choice. I still think you’d be better off with Tommy…” It’s no surprise that Ellie shoves her bag at Joel, “Let’s go.” He blinks and you laugh as he answers, “Okay.”

Both of you exit the stables with your horses, Joel helps Ellie mount his horse and you mount your own horse. “General direction?” Joel asks his brother, “Head southeast til you hit I-25. It’s right off the interstate. Shouldn’t be hard to miss.” He nods at Tommy before they both pull each other into a hug. They pull away and Tommy says, “There’s a place for you here… All three of you.” Joel gruffly says, “Countin’ on it.” And he spots Tommy’s rifle swung across his shoulder, “Can I borrow that?” Tommy nods, “Yeah.” But Joel continues to talk, “‘Cause Maria took mine.” Tommy throws him a look, “I already said yes, Joel. Adios, big brother.”

The large wooden gate’s latch is lifted open as your two horses trot through the snow. Exiting the safe, gated, community of Jackson. Your journey continues through the wilderness of Wyoming. The cold chilly air creates goosebumps at the back of your neck as you ride your horse past the tall emerald-green trees.

After a couple of hours of riding, Joel decides to teach Ellie how to shoot with the rifle. The sound of loud gunshots rings out as Ellie misses the main target. She sighs and Joel comments, “Wide right. You’re flinchin’.” You stand behind the two, enjoying the view of Joel and Ellie having some time together. Ellie shakes her head at him, denying, “The target’s too small.” Joel harrumphs at her, “I made it bigger than I should’ve. Eject the cartridge.” She does as she is told, and said, “I am not flinching.” Joel hums, “Mm-mhm.” Ellie doesn’t let up, “The rifle just sucks.”

“Okay, give it,” Joel said and Ellie gives it to him and whines, “It doesn’t aim right.” Joel only hums again, “Mm-hmm.” And Ellie frowns as she lifts her binoculars, “You’ll see.” They swap places and Joel grunts as he adjusts the rifle, “A deep breath in, slow breath out.” The girl sighs and Joel glances behind him to look at you, “You squeeze the trigger like you love it.” Your face warms at the memory of what happened last night and what he could be insinuating. You try to hide your smile, he winks at you and then looks to the scope, his voice getting deeper, “Gentle… steady… nice and slow.” Ellie drops her binoculars and groans, “You gonna shoot this thing or get Birdie pregnant? ‘Cause holy shit you guys were loud.” You choke on air at the same time Joel looks at Ellie shamelessly before looking back at the scope with his finger on the trigger. Ellie shakes her head, continuing to be in denial, “It isn’t gonna work. It doesn’t aim right.” A gunshot rings out, and it's a perfect headshot. “You dick.” Ellie says while Joel just smirks smugly and turns to look at you, “Birdie would know.” You throw your head and hands up in exasperation, “I fuckin’ can’t with you two.”

Wind bustled through the branches of the trees, making the leaves howl in their symphony. The horses trot through the snow, as the three of you make your way to the University of Eastern Colorado. The silence is no longer present, only filled by Ellie’s questions and Joel's answers. You occasionally input your own thoughts and ideas, correcting Joel when needed, but otherwise, you let yourself watch them form a connection that Joel was so afraid of.

“So the way they ran stuff in Jackson, was how things used to be?” Ellie asked, and Joel replies, “No. The country was too big for that. Back then, there were basically two main ways of lookin’ at things. Some people wanted to own everything. And some people didn’t want anyone to own anything at all.” Ellie hums, “Which one were you?” And you hear Joel reply, “Neither. I just did my job.” To which you chuckled, knowing that Joel has always tried to stay neutral in anything, it’s more efficient that way.

“Which was… building?” Ellie asks, and Joel confirms her guess, “That’s right. Houses, stores, that kinda thing. We were called ‘contractors’.” The teen mocks his voice, trying to deepen it, “The contractor. That’s pretty cool.” Joel smiles, his lips quirking a bit to the right, “Yeah. We were cool. Everybody loved contractors.” You rolled your eyes at Joel, letting him off the hook and not wanting to correct him at all.

The days go by and you three have been closer than ever. Joel and Ellie discuss the basics and rules of football while you hum to yourself the new song stuck in your head. Enjoying the sight of Joel and Ellie laughing and smiling over mundane topics, feeling your heart more full than ever before. A part of you that had been missing so long, a family you didn’t even know existed, a family you now found.

Further down the road, you pass by the sign indicating to take the I-25. “Well, how ‘bout that? Made it in five days.” Ellie adds, “Easy days. I don’t know what Tommy was so afraid of.” Joel’s mouth curls downwards, “Still time to find out.” To which Ellie mimics his baritone voice, “Still time to find out,” she then creepily whispers, “The Contractorrrr.”

The horses snort and huff as its hooves clop and trot on the pavement of the road. You make your way to the entrance of the deserted university, Ellie says aloud, “Home of the Big Horns. What does that mean?” And you answer, “It was their team mascot. It’s a kind of sheep.” Ellie smiles up at Joel, “Oh, see? One step closer to your dream. Don’t see any Fireflies, though.” He forms a hypothesis, “They’re probably in the middle. Safer.” He nods and leads, “This way.”

Joel has his rifle ready with one hand on the reins. The campus is eerily empty and quiet as your horses trot on the grounds. “So these places… people would live here and, like, what? Got to classes and stuff?” And you nod, “Yup. Sometimes even do research, like me.” She points out, “Even though they were adults.” Yours and Joel’s voices blended together as he answered, “Sort of adults.” While you said, “They were fake adulting.”

“I think it was just as much about partying and findin’ themselves as anythin’ else. Figuring what they wanted to do with their lives.” Joel plainly puts, and Ellie chuckles, “What they wanted to do with their lives.” To your happy surprise, your ears perk up when Joel says, “So I’ve been thinkin’.” You and Ellie urge him to continue, “I don’t want a sheep ranch, actually. I mean, if the deal is I can do anything?” And Ellie nods, “That’s the deal.” He faces the road ahead with a gaze so soft you barely recognized him, “Well… when I was a kid, I wanted to be a singer.” Ellie laughs while you smile widely at him, teeth showing and cheeks pinched upwards, the kid says, “Shut up.” While you say, “Come on Cowboy, let’s hear it. Serenade me.”

“No, you’re both already laughin’.” He grumpily replies, his eyebrows knitted together, and both you and Ellie protest, “Well, you’re singing for me later. I’m gonna save the fuckin’ world, man. It’s the least you could do for me.” Joel relents, “Fair enough. Birdie, what about you? Have you changed your dream yet?”

You smiled at the two people you’d gotten close with over the past few months, the unlikely bond you now were a part of, “I have everything I need right here, what else would I need to dream about?” you said. The two of them looked at you, wide-eyed and breathless at your statement. How funny it is to think, we only notice light when darkness crashes against it. The melody you carry is the strength while they come undone and the aftermath that makes them new.

Content with your answer, you trot forward with your horse and you three stumble upon a troop of monkeys that presumably escaped from a lab, Ellie exclaims excitedly, “Are those monkeys?” The troop proceeds to run away as Joel says, “Must be from the old labs.” The young girl laughs, “Look at them go.” Joel glances at her and asks, “First time seein’ a monkey?” Ellie parrots as a reply, “First time seein’ a monkey.”

“Lookit.” Joel points out to spot a Firefly symbol, “Here we go.” Ellie says, and your head in the direction of the research lab. As you arrive at what looks to be the entrance to the lab, “Guard stations.” Ellie states and Joel hums, “Mhm. No guards.” Ellie is unnerved and wary, she asks to take out her gun, and Joel allows it.

You dismount your horse and tie it to the tree, Joel and Ellie do the same. You arm yourselves as you walk inside the lab. The sound of your footsteps echoes in the deserted building, you look to the ground to see documents and masks littering the concrete floor. “There were definitely doctors here,” Ellie says looking at the test tubes and you spot a brown file on top of the metal trolly. You lift the cover of the folder, peeking at the papers, your eyes skimming over the words while lifting up the yellow sheet of paper, “This is a packing list. They moved out of here.” Ellie’s eyebrows furrow, “They just left?”

And on cue you hear the sound of metal clanging from upstairs, your heads whip up in the direction of the noise, and Ellie remarks, “Maybe not all of them.” Joel takes the lead as you make your way up the stairs, hearing the clanging sound getting louder. Joel finds the specific door to where the noises were coming from, and he readies his pistol, slowly pushing the door open, slightly creaking as it does, to be followed by a high-pitched screech.

Two monkeys hop out of the room through the window, screeching at you for disturbing them. You all lower your weapons and survey the area. You snort at the fact it was so anti-climactic for nothing, Joel utters, “Well… at least it ain’t Clickers.” And Ellie mumbles, “Yeah, no Fireflies either. Maybe in all that research, they turned into fuckin’ monkeys.” You and Joel sense her disappointment, her need for reformation, and ways she could be better in her mind.

You look through the medical equipment and research notes, trying to look for clues to where the group of researchers transferred. Joel approaches the large wooden corkboard, a map of the United States is on display along with notes pasted on the side. You and Ellie walk up next to Joel to analyze the pins pushed in the lines that trace along the roads leading to the center. “That’s where they went?” Ellie said, pointing out St. Mary's Hospital, located in Salt Lake City, Utah. Joel nods, “All the pins lead there. Maybe gettin’ ahead of the weather… better facilities? I don’t know.” The joy in you vanishes against your will. The light goes out and your heart goes still, and just like that, you believe in ghosts.

But then, the trio hears voices. Looking out the window, Joel sees four men armed with weapons, they were raiders. You were weighed down by dread, the flutter of fear in your stomach causes your palms to sweat and tremble. You needed to get out of here and fast. Joel quietly tells you both, “Out the back.” You run down the steps and find the back door, your guns are drawn as you stealthily make it back to your horses, staying ever vigilant. You’re a few steps away from your horses, Joel turns to you both asking in a hushed tone, “Ready?” And you both nod, “Yeah.”

You run to your own horse while Ellie and Joel untie theirs. Something caught your eye in your peripheral vision, a blur of a shadow, and you turn to see a man carrying a baseball bat, lifting it while running at Joel. Ellie screams his name out while you ran towards the attacker, the baseball bat breaks as he tries to hit you but instead strikes a tree. You didn’t think, you just acted, protecting the two people who kept you safe for the majority of your journey. Shoving him with as much force as you could, the raider hits the tree, and Joel comes to your aid, grabbing the raider to break the man’s neck.

You didn’t even realize it until Joel had turned around, in the struggle, the sharp wooden hilt of the bat is stuck inside his abdomen, blood seeping out through the jacket. Ellie’s eyes grow wide in horror and Joel looks down, and grunts as he pulls out the sharp hilt of the bat, you scream, “No, don’t!” But you were too late, and Ellie yells your name, “Birdie you’re also bleeding!” You look down at your own abdomen to find a large slash across it, the maroon blood dripping on the freshly fallen snow, you direct Ellie, “Get Joel on the horse now. We need to leave before…” You hear yelling from a distance and you aim and shoot at the raiders with one hand as the other clutches your stomach while Ellie helps Joel up and back onto the horse.

You use all the strength that you have and pull yourself up to your horse, following Ellie as she shoots them back with you, she yells, “Get back!” And you three were in time to get away from all the other raiders coming. After a few minutes, you three have managed to make it to a safe distance from the attackers, “They’re not following us, I think we’re safe.” Joel doesn’t reply, and Ellie voices her concern as her voice rises as she says yours and Joel’s name.

He’s the first one to collapse from his horse, and you go toppling down as well. You feel the plush landing of the pile of snow, Ellie immediately comes both to your sides, and she says in distress, “Fuck! Shit, no, no no.” The cold weather mixed with the blood loss you were both dealing with were not the best conditions for either of you. “Joel, Birdie, open your eyes come on.” You bring your tired eyes to the girls and cough out to Ellie, “Place pressure on his abdomen and drag him using his sleeping bag, the rope, and the horse Leave me here and find someplace warm.” Ellie can feel her eyes sting and her vision goes blurry, it feels like bittersweet poetry. You softly grab your hand, “Listen to me. Ellie.” She tries to shake her head but you gritted your teeth, the adrenaline had begun to fade and you were beginning to feel the sharp pain across your stomach, you grunt and squeeze her soft small hands, “Ellie, remember what I asked you to promise? Go. Please, save him.”

It had been a campfire night out in the woods at the university and Joel had fallen asleep again during watch. You had both been talking about mundane things, to your hobbies and what you missed about home, to ask about what her life was like in FEDRA school, at one point you realized that there would be a difficult decision to make and that you needed to prepare her just in case it might occur. You didn’t memorize everything from the game, but you knew damn well there would be a possibility that you and Joel might get injured and Ellie would have to choose.

You grab her hand, abruptly stopping her from her previous sentence, and look her in the eye, “Ellie. There will be a time when you have to choose between me and Joel. In the event we both get badly injured, you need to save Joel, no questions asked.” The teen tries to protest but you silence her, leaving no room for argument, “Joel will protect you better than I ever could, we both know that. You need him more than me, I’ve been alone for almost all of my life… this is nothing new, but you… you are something so special. You must choose Joel for your sake, do you understand?” Ellie’s lips form a thin line, and stubbornly she shakes her head, “No. I’ll save you both. Just you watch.” Your eyes soften at her naiveness and hope, “You can’t save everyone, Ellie. So, I know it’s unfair to ask you this, but I need you to promise me to save him when it comes down to it.” Her eyes begin to water as she reluctantly tells you, “Okay.”

In a voice so broken and vulnerable, you hear Ellie whisper into the cold air as she puts pressure on Joel’s wound and looks at both of you, “I can’t fuckin’ do this without you. I don’t know where the fuck I’m going, what the fuck I’m gonna do. Joel, Birdie.” You give her a small smile, “Ellie, sometimes, just getting up and carrying on is brave and magnificent. Keep going, Ellie.” She sniffs and she lets tears slip down her cheeks, you keep smiling as you use the rest of your strength to lift your hand to cup her cheek, wiping away the tears, “It’s okay. It’s okay, Ellie. This was where I was meant to be. Thank you, Ellie, remember that you are loved.”

You feel your vision begins to fade and drop your hand from Ellie’s cheek, letting your head rest on the plush snow, no longer looking at the teen, you tearily look up to feel the snowflakes gently fall on your face. You distantly hear Ellie drag Joel and tie him up on the sleeping bag as a makeshift sled. Your eyelids begin to feel heavy and start to droop, you turn your head to see Joel struggling to open his eyes, seeing your freezing, bleeding-out body staining the white cold snow. Joel cries out your name, pleading, “Birdie. Wait. No. Please…”

You look up at the bright gray sky, blinking and slowly beginning to only hear muffled sounds. Your horse decides to rest next to you, knowing what was about to happen, cuddling your bleeding-out body, and staying with you til the end. You decide that this was the best way to go, protecting and shielding the people you loved as much as you could. So you hum carols softly, as sweet as you know, a prayer that our burdens will lift as you go.

Previous Chapter -> Next Chapter

END NOTES:

AGAIN MY BAD FOR THE HUGGGEEE DELAY – I 1000% blame the jet lag since I just flew out to somewhere on the East Coast! Sorry, ya’ll! T^T (Also the fuckin 5 hours of sleep, I am running on fumes rn)

YAY YOU KISSED AND SLEPT TOGETHER WOW GOOD JOB

UR OFFICIALLY HIS GIRL *confetti*

Holy fucking shit that was sO HARD TO WRITE

OKAY NOT BECAUSE I WAS UNCOMFY WRITING IT CHILL– its um, cuz, miss gorl here has never been properly kissed or um had a boyfriend lol so take a freaking guess to why

So writing a romance scene reALLY REALLY TESTED MY KNOWLEDGE, PATIENCE, AND HECKING ALL THE ROMANCE BOOKS I’VE READ PLEASE I WAS CLAWING MY WAY THROUGH THE ENTIRE TIME

I hope it wasn’t too awful or unrealistic :,))

HORRAY FOR FINALLY FACING YOUR FEAR AND VOICING OUT UR NEEDS AND WANTS GOOD JOB HERE HAVE A COOKIE

FUCK JOEL GOT STABBED MF

YOU ALSO GOT INJURED?? AGAIN?? WTF IS WRONG WITH U *bonk* ARE U DEAD OH NO? WTH!?!?1

ALSO MF PEDRO PASCAL IF I EVER MEET YOU I MIGHT HAVE A MENTAL BREAKDOWN IN FRONT OF YOU AFTER YOU DESCRIBED PTSD SO WELL WTF– ahem, I have PTSD and I’ve never seen me represented properly in any television series or movies. It’s always (usually) war veterans yk (CALM DOWN— CHILL PRETTY VALID AND PRETTY DAMN FUCKIN TRAUMATIC) But as someone who has PTSD and yk hasn’t been to a literal war it’s a bit harder to connect or relate to it (im not fucking whining, I’m just telling you my experience with PTSD) But the way Pedro showed it— fuck man. It was like staring at a mirror. My own brokeness represented in one episode. I felt so seen for the first time.

BUT THIS ONE, MF PEDRO U DESERVE ALL THE AWARDS

yay for Maria and Tommy! Such cuties congrats on the baby!!

someone should probably help me find a boyfriend— idk i Need research for smut :DD (this is a joke please don’t)

This chapter was wAYYYU more personal and intimate to write about. I just needed to do this right for my sake and others.

Sorry for the delay! The smut part was a little bit intimidating to write since yk I have zero experience with it LMAO

Thank you for sticking with me and I look forward to all of your comments and feedback! It gives me an idea if im doing this right and opportunity to connect with all of you! I LOVE YOU GUYS SOSOS MUCH AND OFF TO EP 7 I GO AHHHHH

Grace

#uneven odds joel miller #unevenodds #uneven odds #unevenoddstaglist #alternate universe #joel miller masterlist #joel miller x poc!reader #joel miller series #joel miller x reader #joelmiller #joel miller x reader au #joel miller x y/n #joel miller x reader tlou #joel miller x modern reader #tlouhbo #tlou series #tlou #tlou hbo #tlou au

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