#joe caused trouble from the off and that's why he's the wildcard

[lectern-fullcauldron]

my favourite bits from some hermits' first ever hermitcraft videos:

Joe: [very poor mic quality] "howdy y'all! Joe Hills here, recording as I always do in Nashville, Tennessee, and I seem to have found myself on the hermitcraft server, despite it being private and whitelisted, a testament to my ingenuity and the foolishness of others" GenB: "...Hypno, we've been hoodwinked"

Cleo: "oh there's a FUCK ton of horses over there... well, Joe's offline and I'm too shy to speak to everyone"

Etho: immediately just crawls into redstone and farms and gets distracted by bits of string doing block updates that he wants to figure out

Cub: "Land ho, Hypno!" a whole video of hermit chaos and running about with cub being pretty quiet only for him to unmute, run around calling everyone's builds beautiful and then add mineshafts to the Mesa before Mojang did

Impulse: mumbo, X, and tango doing their giggly impulse summoning ritual for redstone purposes

Xisuma: 48 seconds into the video, the active hermits (Hypno included) are plotting to hunt him down and kill him because they think he's afk

Doc: episode title: humble beginnings, episode opening: two and a half minutes of dramatic music as doc gives a third person camera tour of the server with the back of his head firmly in the centre of the shot

False: poor, quiet, wet cat just wants a job in some xisuma and mumbo led roleplay

Mumbo (this is the first hermitcraft episode I ever watched, btw): he's building a plaza and he needs the hermits to validate his fountain idea because what if he builds a fountain and the hermits don't like it? building is hard, btw

Gem and Pearl: in the pit, go. Get in the pit. Ok, now we can start

Keralis: "yo, yo, it's keralis", "no, I won't be doing a tutorial for this house because it's a pain in the ass to make", "me and survival is really shitty, it's not my cup of tea at all"

[theminecraftbee]

“Hey Iskall,” Joe says, adjusting the diamond glasses he’d been given. He thinks they’re the wrong prescription, which is a little annoying, since he’d given Ren the right one, but what can he do? It’s almost like diamond isn’t a particularly good material for actual optical lenses or something. Who knew.

“Joe,” says Iskall. He’s not adjusting his glasses. He is, in fact, wearing his upside-down, because he has a robotic eye anyway and doesn’t need glasses the way Joe does, so the optical qualities of diamond lenses give him no trouble no matter which way he wears them. Joe’s jealous.

“So, I was wondering,” Joe says, adjusting the lenses again. “So like, I’m pretty good at reading people wrong. I’d say it’s one of my best skills, along with painstakingly making to-scale models of things and also accidentally causing more problems than I intend.”

“Alright,” says Iskall, bemused for what frankly seems like no reason at all.

“And like, because of that, I often miss the joke,” Joe says.

“You? Miss the joke?” Iskall says.

“I know, right? But it happens all the time! You’d never have expected it!”

“Mhm,” says Iskall. Joe gets the sense that he’s missed another joke.

“Anyway, I normally ask Cleo these things, but the thing is, I think she’s in on it,” Joe says.

“…on what?”

“The joke,” Joe says, looking over at a king dressed in red, a right hand, a temperamental zombie, and a wildcard conman, all standing together under the roof of the same Crastle. He tastes blood on his tongue a little looking at them, or maybe feels a nearby ghost (the difference has always been sort of hard to tell for Joe, but it’s one of the two). “I think she’s in on the joke, and you’re not.”

“…the joke,” Iskall says.

“Yeah,” says Joe. “Or, maybe not a joke? But like, it feels like… you know, to me, anyway. And maybe to you! That’s why I was asking if you knew what it was. This doesn’t seem like something I can ask Cleo. I don’t think she does, from the inside.”

Iskall watches them for a moment.

“I don’t know,” he says.

“But like, you see it, right?” Joe asks.

“Yeah, Joe, I see it,” Iskall says.

“Oh good. I was starting to feel like I was imagining things. At least there are two of us imagining them if we are.”

Iskall is oddly quiet. He’s frowning. The serious expression is somewhat undermined by his upside-down diamond glasses, but hey, Joe trying to be serious is undermined by his everything else, so he gets it.

“…what are we missing out on,” murmurs Iskall.

“I have no idea!” Joe says. “That’s why I was asking you.”

“Do you want to try to investigate?” Iskall asks.

“I mean, since you’re asking.…”

Joe whips out his notebook. Joe squints at his notebook. Joe sighs.

“Let me get my normal glasses first. Then we scheme.”

“I’ll be waiting, dude,” Iskall says, and Joe spares a glance for the strange way his best friend moves in this place before wandering off to find the glasses he can actually, like, see in. Maybe they’re less fashionable than the diamond ones, but they’re far more practical, which isn’t normally a thing Joe would care about, but call him crazy…

Well, he may need to be a little practical to figure this one out.

(At the table, the King creates a banner.)

[reggiemantleholdmyhand-tle]

HARRY POTTER.

*supporting cast, A-E, all canon is connected

Name: Annalise Willow

Era: Golden Trio

Fic: Bad Decisions (Make the Best Stories)

Love Interest: Booker Mabbitt, Fitz Fitzgerald

Face Claim: Hailee Steinfeld

Summary: Annalise was perfectly content with Booker — he was handsome, and tall, and charming — but when she finds out Fitz had harbored a crush on her for years, she begins to wonder if she made the right choice.

Name: Augustus ‘Auggie’ Scardino

Era: Marauders, Golden Trio

Fic: When the Sun Met the Moon, The Trouble With Weasleys, Mistakes We Knew We Were Making

Love Interest: Dorcas Meadowes, TBD

Face Claim: Milo Ventimiglia

Summary: Auggie had had far too much tragedy in his life. He’d lost his older brother at a young age to a fatal accident, one he himself had survived. Just ten years later, he lost almost everyone he cared about to the First Wizarding War. With ample survivor’s guilt, he holes up in a shoddy flat in London for years, until his dear friend Arthur Weasley calls him up for help with the war. He almost says no, until he meets the gang of youngsters he’ll be fighting alongside, and finds himself being reminded of his own friends back in the day.

Name: Aurelius Bostwick

Era: Golden Trio

Fic/Series: The Trouble With Weasleys

Love Interest: Charlie Weasley

Face Claim: Robert Sheehan

Summary: Aurelius was a wildcard through and through — always in trouble at school, speaking in riddles and nonsensical sentences, dropping into his friends’ homes unexpectedly. But if there was one thing Aurelius was, it was intuitive. He knew exactly how someone was feeling at first glance, and he knew how Fred Weasley felt about Maisie. However, Aurelius was always one for drama, and there was no way he was going to reveal what he knew until it played out.

Name: Ayla Timmons (later Barker)

Era: Marauders

Fic/Series: When the Sun Met the Moon, The Trouble With Weasleys

Love Interest: Brant Barker

Face Claim: Maisie Peters

Summary: Ayla had been friends with Brant Barker for as long as she could remember, after he knocked the wind out of her on Platform 9 3/4 at the start of their first year. Everyone knew they were meant to be, even Ayla and Brant themselves, but she wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction before he even made the effort to do something about it.

Name: Booker Mabbitt

Era: Golden Trio

Fic: Bad Decisions (Make the Best Stories)

Love Interest: Annalise Willow

Face Claim: Jordan Fisher

Summary: Booker knew he had won at life when he’d snagged himself a catch like Annalise Willow, but he didn’t think it would be so hard to keep her locked down. When Annalise starts to question her feelings for him, he knows exactly who is causing her to do so, and he’ll be damned if he lets it happen.

Name: Brant Barker

Era: Marauders

Fic/Series: When the Sun Met the Moon, The Trouble With Weasleys

Love Interest: Ayla Timmons (though he has hooked up with Gilderoy Lockhart and Sirius Black)

Face Claim: Joe Keery

Summary: Brant knew he was going to marry Ayla Timmons from the moment he saw her. Why even worry about something if you know it’s going to happen anyway? He hadn’t meant to put her on the back burner, but when he ends up too busy playing matchmaker for Iridessa and Remus, Ayla makes it pretty clear that he screwed up.

Name: Celestine Bostwick

Era: Marauders, Golden Trio

Fic/Series: The Trouble With Weasleys

Love Interest: Minerva McGonagall

Face Claim: Holland Taylor

Summary: Celestine was the type of Professor you could go to on her off hours with any sort of problem, or even just for a chat, and she would pour you a cup of tea and listen. She was good at problem solving and always had good words of advice — so why couldn’t she solve any of her own problems?

Name: Dominic D’Angelo

Era: Golden Trio

Fic: Bad Decisions (Make the Best Stories)

Love Interest: Gemma Fitzgerald

Face Claim: Drew Ray Tanner

Summary: Dom really should have known what he was getting into when he became friends with Fitz. He knew Fitz was unpredictable, driven, dumb as all hell, but it hadn’t bothered him until Fitz came up with the terrible plan to fake date Alicia Spinnet. Now he was stuck with another huge secret, and his crush on Fitz’s younger sister Gemma was more than enough.

Name: Elodie Bardot

Era: Golden Trio

Fic/Series: The Trouble With Weasleys

Love Interest: Fred Weasley, Eero Barnaby (@hughstheforcelou)

Face Claim: Kristen Froseth

Summary: Elodie meets Fred for the first time during a fateful encounter at Florean Fortescue’s Ice Cream Parlor and is instantly smitten. She adores him and his friends, especially Maisie, who she is determined to get close with. Maisie doesn’t make it easy, that’s for sure.

Name: Everard Bostwick-Caulkins

Era: Golden Trio

Fic/Series: The Trouble With Weasleys

Love Interest: Senan Bostwick-Caulkins (@hughstheforcelou)

Summary: Older brother to Aurelius and much more level-headed, Everard is just cruising through life with no worries. He’s wise, he’s curious, and he’s as quick as a whip. Just don’t tell his mum that he, too, loves a bit of mischief every once in a while.

[baseballnerdo-blog]

Amateur Draft analysis - 1st Round Picks - College players

1) Buzz Cortes Our rank - 10 - Buzz is a left handed starting pitcher with great base stats that should dominate against lefties. Against righties he may have difficulty, hence why we had him 10th 2) Randy Hammonds Our rank - 2 The wildcard of the draft. Randy told everyone he wouldn't sign unless he could slot right into ML ball. Our scouts showed he has potential to play in the bigs right now with a good bat and stellar defence. He still has yet to sign. Was this all a ploy so he could play Indie ball and be a free agent next year? Breaking news: Hammonds has signed and looks like he could already be a force in the big leagues. This was a gamble that looks to have paid off bigtime for Huntington. 5) Del Hague Our rank - 5 Not much speed and a slightly below average defensive player. Del Hague will make up for that with a stellar bat. He may have trouble making contact with the ball, but when he does he is going to hit it a mile. Del has also yet to sign so we don't know how he currently looks. 9) Joe Merloni Our pick - 9 A very good, right handed pitcher with solid pitches, good control and is effective against both left and right handed batters. Merloni was ranked lower on our board because he lacks the ability to go deep into games. With a stamina of 52 and a durability of 27 he fits somewhere between a starter and the bullpen. It will be interesting to see how Montreal use him. 10) Clayton Jennings Our rank - 6 An all around second baseman who does a little bit of everything. A good bat, defence and speed. This is the type of player you want on your team because he can get on base and plug up the middle infield. Jennings questionable ability to stay healthy is probably what caused him to drop in the draft. If Colorado can maintain a good training and medical department, they have a real gem in the 10th pick. 12) Jeurys Guerrero Our rank - 2 An all around hitting back catcher. At 19 Guerrero already has the hitting ability to play in the majors. His ability to see balls and lay off bad pitches was unmatched in this draft class. Still has a ways to go to be an effective back catcher but could easily be a major league pinch hitter right out of college. 13) Evan Pomeranz Our pick - 14 A decent enough bat. Pomeranz greatest strength will be his legs. Pomeranz looks to be a defensive short stop that will be able to steal bases when he reaches the big leagues. Los Angeles field instructor will play a vital role determining just how good Pomeranz can be. 15) Stan Conforto Our pick - NA A great pick at the 15th spot. Conforto already has great fundamentals, control and decent pitches at the young age of 19. His slider and circle change will need some work to truly be dominant but we will see this young stud in the majors in a few seasons. 16) Jumbo Jamie Our rank - 29 Jumbo Jamie has probably the best name in the draft that we found. A good quality relief pitcher that may have gone a little high in the draft. Jamie has the skills to become a big leaguer but with a poor stamina/durability combination it will be interesting to see how many innings he can pitch a year. 17) Karl Howell Our rank 22 At 20 years old Howell is already strong as a bear. When this kid gets a hold of the ball, it's going to travel. Howell also exhibits strong defensive possibility and should be an excellent shortstop with proper coaching. Colorado hitting coaches will have to work on Howell making good contact with the ball and laying off bad pitches. If Howell can be consistent with putting the bat on the ball, he could be a big asset for Colorado going forward. 19) Bruce Swift Our rank - 40 A young leftie with good control and a dangerous 4 seam fastball. Swift has the potential to eat a lot of innings for the Black Sox in an end of the rotation role or as long relief. He has yet to sign despite asking for slot money. Swift may be back in the pool next year. 20) Jario Volquez Our rank - NA Volquez has great fundamentals for a 21 year old pitcher. He already has great splits against both lefties and righties and a great fastball/slider combination. Going forward Volquez' control and health may hinder his success as a starting pitcher but he should still play a valuable role when he reaches the major leagues. 21) Ji-Man Joon Our rank - 81 An interesting pick at 21. Joon is a right handed pitcher who projects to throw a lot of ground ball pitches and has the ability to strike a lot of guys out. Joon projects to have good control of his pitches and possesses a great fastball but other then that he may have trouble being able to get major league hitters out. Joon has yet to sign with Salem and may have better base numbers then are currently projected. 22) Marty Crosby Our rank - 3 At 19 Crosby already has the ability to hit the ball a ton and has a good grasp of how to tell balls from strikes. Before he reaches the majors he will have to work on his contact and his defensive responsibilities as a back catcher. His durability may come into question if he is unable to improve it over the coming season. 25) Toru Donald Our rank - 16 Entered the draft as a shortstop but may not have the defensive ability to make it in that position in the big leagues. Donald should still be a very effective third baseman for Kansas City. Donald already has good base ratings across the board. With good development, he should become a talented day to day player, or at least a very versatile bench player. 31) Mac Aubrey Our rank - NA At 19, Aubrey already has a dominant 4 seam fastball and a very effective slider. He is able to control his pitches well and has a very high durability, allowing him to recover after starts very quickly. His ability to keep the ball down may be a concern going forward, but if he can improve his splits and improve one of his other pitches, Aubrey should settle nicely into Baltimores rotation. 33) Carlos Graces Our rank - 4 Graces is a bit of an oddity. At 19 he has amazing base stats across the board including a great fastball and curveball. His splits, control and stamina are all very good for his age. Many other owners probably avoided Graces due to his durability. With an abysmal durability rating of 11 with scouts saying it will never improve, this pitcher may struggle to reach 90 innings a year. It will be interesting to see what role St. Louis slots him into when he reaches the majors.

[yautja-lover]

Chapter 1 Esmeralda's Flashback to Memory Lane: Part 1

TLC: Tables, Ladders and Chairs December 16, 2012 Esmeralda P.O.V. Since I'm off for the holiday from training at NXT so I can be a wrestler at WWE. Even though I won't be able to spend time with my family because they won't be able to make it. So I'm heading to the TLC pay-per-view show to watch and I'm wearing my Shield t-shirt to support my boys. I know them since high school but, they don't know I'm coming so it's a surprise. The show just started, the first match was a Tables match to determine the #1 Contenders for the Tag Team Championship between Team Rhodes Scholars against Rey Mysterio and Sin Cara. In the end, Sin Cara attempted a Springboard but Rhodes pushed Sin Cara in mid-air, knocking him through a table on the floor, meaning that Rhodes and Sandow won the match. Next, was the United States Championship match between Antonio Cesaro and R-Truth. Cesaro performed a Neutralizer on R-Truth to retain the title. The third match was for the WWE Intercontinental Championship between Kofi Kingston and Wade Barrett. In the end, Barrett attempted a Bull Hammer on Kingston but, he ducked and performed Trouble in Paradise on Barrett to retain the title. The first main event was a Six-Man Tables, Ladders and Chairs Tag-Team match between the Shield and Tag-Team Champions; Team Hell No and Ryback. The Shield dominanted the early part of the match by isolating one member of the other team and executed a Triple Powerbomb through a broadcast table on Ryback. As I watch on, I start to remember how we first met. *Flashback Starts* Eleven Years Earlier at Pensacola Catholic High school in 2002 After my mom dropped my brother off at middle school and dropped me off at high school. I head inside when I walked in and noticed all eyes were on me. They all started whispering to each other so, I head to my homeroom but, for some reason I felt like someone was watching my every move. When I turned around sure enough I was right but I had three pairs of eyes watching me, three boys to be exact. One of them on the left; had a light tan-toned skin, brown eyes and little blonde streak in his shoulder-length hair. The one in the middle next to him; had tan skin I'm guessing, Samoan, brown eyes and had short black afro hair. The one on the right; had light skin, blue eyes and short blonde hair slicked back with sideburns showing. So I just turned around and headed to my room, when the teacher gave us our schedule we started heading to our classes. For some reason I felt like someone was watching me all day but, everytime I looked nobody was there. Maybe, I'm imagining things I thought to myself while, I was getting my lunch and head for a table to sit at. I heard people started talking about me. "Hey its the new girl or should I say the geekie middle schooler" , "I bet you she slept with someone to skip a grade" , "Your right her mom is a prostitute after all" , "You know what they say, if there's something wrong with the bitch then, there's something wrong with the pup" that hurt even though no of those are true. "Shut up, just SHUT UP!" I yelled, "You should watch who your talking to slut, have a nice trip bitch,"someone said as I tripped over there foot. Next thing I know, in one swift motion out of nowhere the two-toned man caught my tray of food, the Samoan caught me from behind when I was half-way about to hit the floor and the guy with sideburns had the guy that tripped me in a choke hold. Where the hell did these three boys come from? They weren't in here before were they? "Are you okay,baby girl? "the Samoan asked in a deep baritone voice that could make a girl melt from, I couldn't from words to speak so I just nodded my head. He set me down gently after, he stand me up straight but still had his arm around my waist, the two-toned man gave me my tray back and faced the other two, "Jon,"he said. The one with sideburns loosen his grip on him but, had a hold of him by the back of his shirt and grabbed another guy from the back of his shirt. The two-toned man did the same thing to the other two that was sitting at the same table as the other one. Are these the four that I heard talk about me? These three couldn't possibly know, they weren't even in the room. Or were they? "I suggest you four better apologize to this young lady for talking about her and tripping her,"the two-toned man said, okay...maybe they were in here, "Why should we she's just a bitch and slu..."he didn't even get to finish because I'm guessing Jon since that's what they called him. He still had a hold of the other one while, he slammed the one that was talking onto the lunch table face first, "Shut the fuck up and just fuckin' apologize you funckin' prick,"he said in a deep raspy voice, man he sure does have a sailor mouth and I noticed the Samoan still had his arm around my waist but it tensed up a little bit, "I suggest you listen to my friend and you and your crew better apologize, "he said in a much calmer voice but, still dominante and demanding. "Oh look guys the big bad quiet Joe, finally speaks,"he said with his face still in the table, "I'll talk when I have something important to say. Now apologize, NOW, "he said in a demanding tone, pulling me closer into his chest. Damn he smells good, "Okay, Okay, I'm sorry it won't happen again, "they all said at once I just nodded still not able to find my voice, "Good, boys let them go,"Joe said causing the two-toned man to let go of the two he had but, Jon still haven't let go of the other two. "Jon, let go now," they both said in unison and he did,"You two get the hell out of my face,"Jon said, they didn't even say anything else they just scattered and took off running. "Anoa'i, Lopez, Good. Office now!"the principal said, with the other two that already left standing right next to him smirking. I don't know what or how but I managed to find my voice, "Wait a minute...sir," I said before anything else happened, "Yes, Ms. Lockhart?"he asked. "May I ask why?" I asked, "Well, these two gentlemen told me that these three..."he said pointing to them, "were picking on you and beating up..."I didn't even let him finish his sentence because I knew that it was a lie. "Oh hell no, that's not what happened at all. If anything you have it the other way around, "I said making the principal look at me confused, the two gave me a death glare and the three smiled at me and then smirked at the two,"Look these two..."I said pointing to them ,"were the ones picking on me and as for these three..."I said pointing at them,"stand up for me and just have them apologize for what they did, "I explained. "Is this true?"he asked the three, "Yes sir,along with the other two, "the two-toned man said. "You mean the two that supposedly you guys beat up,Colby? " he asked, "If you're referring to two that are hiding behind that trash can..."Colby said pointing, "then yes," They principle looked in that direction, "Okay, you, you, you and you..." he said pointing at the four, "office now, and sorry for the misunderstanding boys,"they nodded. *Flashback Ends* It turned out ever since then we become friends and the four guys end up getting suspended. Nobody else ever messed with me since, then I guess you could say they were afraid to because the boys were always around me. It's been a long time since I seen them and I miss them, the Shield fought with Ryback on the entrance ramp. Ryback threw Rollins off a ladder through two tables, back in the ring Reigns and Ambrose performed an Aided Powerbomb through the table on Bryan for the win. While they celebrate their victory and do their fist bumb they look out to the crowd and saw me. They smile and wave at me since, I was holding my phone and recording them I just smiled at them. I could hear from the announcements table, "A great victory pick up by the Shield but, who are they smiling and waving at?" Jerry Lawler asked, "I don't know King. But whoever it is, they must know them,"said Michael Cole. When the camera's moved in my direction they realized who I was, "OMG, it's Harley Quinn Moxley from NXT, "the King said, "Booker, you work for NXT. What can you tell us about Harley Quinn Moxley?" asked Cole. "She is a bit flirtatious and tricky but, also dominante. She'll fight anyone and I mean anyone, she doesn't care if your a female or a male. She will fight you, she's unpredictable and a wildcard, not to mention with a lot of speed and stamina along with a little bit of a powerhouse, "he explained. THIS IS MY FIRST SHIELD FANFIC WRITING AND THERE WILL BE A SECOND PART TO WITH HER SEEING HER FRIENDS! I'LL HAVE THE NEXT PART POSTED SOMETIME TOMORROW! PLEASE LET ME KNOW HOW I DID!