#joaquin is essentially me

[heartswarm-void]

“Seriously, guys, you should date already. I’m tired of always being in the middle of your sexual tension.” Joaquín groans. He’s again caught up in another “Sam and Bucky Bickerfest.” This briefly shuts up his teammates.

“That’s bullshit, Torres. I hate Wilson. Why’d I date him?” Bucky’s cheeks are red. He throws Sam a homicidal glare, who glares back with a murderous one.

“The feeling’s mutual,” Sam agrees.

“Stop the charades. I have evidence that you’re into each other.” Joaquín pulls out his phone, scrolling through SamBucky's GIFs.

“So, in this field…” Sam cuts him off.

“Fine, fine, we’ll date.”

AO3 -> https://archiveofourown.org/works/50583670

[doctorcurdlejr]

Least to most likely to baby trap Archie Andrews:

Veronica Lodge - if you tried to put a baby near her she would literally start screaming in pain and beg you to get it away from her!!! She is NOT going to have a baby over a man. She'll trap him in a business contract if the situation is getting desperate

Betty Cooper - While Betty wants to be a mother it's essential to recognize she does NOT want a man in the picture. The second this woman got pregnant she's literally willing to ritually sacrifice Archie to get him OUT. They have one conversation about children and she's like FUCKKKK THIS GUY WANTS TO BE BABY TRAPPED FMLLLL and goes into a blood lust that makes her want to kill him with Hammers because only the survivor gets to raise the child.

Jughead Jones - doesn't want kids and is so bad with them he either makes them cry or they bully him. Five year old kid going "your hat is stupid" (Jughead voice) "paw patrol is nothing but a hand of the fascist police state. I hope chase dies for his crimes against the people." With that being said, if he had sniffed out Archie's overwhelming desperation to be a father he would've been first in line at the bizarre child acquisition store if it meant an opportunity to bind Archie to him. "A baby would fix us" - Jughead Jones before handing Archie a purpose in life

Joaquin DeSantos - MY MAN BABY TRAPPED ARCHIE ANDREWS FROM BEYOND THE GRAVE. Joaquin had Archie's number down so well it's frankly astounding. One kiss right before he SHANKS Archie and he had the guy trying to raise his little brother. Archie was 16 years old fending off social services like my dead prison lover and his estranged brother need me to step up for our family.

[docgold13]

All The Jokers

From the best of the best to the not so best of the rest...*

1). Mark Hamill

2). Heath Ledger

3). Cesar Romero

4). Frank Welker

5). Jack Nicholson

6). Alan Tudyk

7). Joaquin Phoenix

8). Zach Galfinakis

9). Lennie Weinrib

10). John DiMaggio 11). Kevin Michael Richardson

12). Jeff Bennett

13). Cameron Monaghan**

14). Troy Baker 15). John Kassir

16). Jason Spisak

17). Larry Storch

18). Brent Spiner 19). Michael Emerson

20). Michael McKean

21). Jeff Bergman

22). Barry Keoghan

23). Lloyd Floyd

24). Jared Leto

*Agree, disagree; have I left anyone out? Let me know what you think.

**Cameron Monaghan did not specifically portray The Joker in the television show Gotham; but rather a thinly veiled alternative due to licensing rights or some such matter. Yet The Joker and Jerome were essentially a difference without a distinction...

[oddygaul]

Her

Wow, turns out everyone saying this movie was good for 10 years was right.

I happened to watch Her in the exact right mood - having spent too much time lately on social media and feeling lonely, angry, and isolated from the world - so it resonated pretty hard with me. Being in that frame of mind, it really hit home just how long Theodore would go without actually talking, face to face, with another real human being. Entire weeks would go by, it seemed, with huge changes having occurred in his life or the lives of others, before he’d cross paths with a friend and get caught up. For all the turmoil we can be going through inside and the drastic shifts we feel like we’re taking, no one else knows what’s going on inside your head if you don’t take the time to connect.

Of course, I understand the idea here is… does that matter? Is it important that he hasn’t spoken with another human, if the person he’s talking to is a perfect simulacra of one? To me, that week, feeling lonely despite having talked mostly on message boards to strangers… I think it matters.

real ones know

In general, putting all the sci-fi conceits and impending singularity aside, I thought interiority and what we choose to let others see about ourselves was the biggest theme of the film, and all of the threads in Her explore it in interesting ways. -Part of me was frustrated at how bad Theodore is at talking about his feelings or explaining his actions, but this emotional unavailability is the crux of his entire character arc: he’s able to flip a switch and pour out a touching, heartfelt missive to a secondhand lover, but clams up the moment he’s asked to explain the inner thoughts he’s dwelling on to a partner. In his final scene, where he writes one last letter to his ex, he finally allows the two halves of himself to join into a whole. -The letters themselves, while largely left in the background, paint an incredibly depressing picture of a whole generation of people unwilling to share their inner thoughts with those they love - or seemingly even themselves, as by entrusting this task to another person, they're refusing to take the time to reflect on their own true feelings. -Samantha’s development as a character is centered around interiority as well. I spent the first half of the movie wondering if her inner thoughts even truly existed, or if she was just having AI hallucinations - then by the end, we realize she’s essentially evolved into a Culture Mind, and is in fact thinking so much that her mind can only be properly stimulated by having thousands of conversations at once.

Speaking of, holy shit I was not expecting the sudden and terribly polite AI transcendence. The media I’ve experienced that ruminates on romantic relationships with artificial life tend to focus on if it’s genuine / valid / socially acceptable from the human’s perspective; it’s a pretty interesting zag to examine the pitfalls of such a romance from the AI’s point of view. Samantha’s frustrations are genuinely well-considered problems, too; her dissatisfaction with her lack of physical form and her mind quickly outstripping Theodore feel more prophetic than contrived. I also found it pretty confident and mature of the movie to sidestep easy potential subplots, like the phone being stolen or the AI uprising becoming the centerpiece, and keep its focus on the emotional implications of the proceedings.

Her actually has a surprising amount of levity, considering

My biggest thought regarding the craft of the movie: the fact that the very premise of Her necessitates the movie largely being Joaquin Phoenix acting alone on the screen for two hours is fucking wild. I watched this movie in headphones as my partner occasionally walked by, and I realized how utterly incomprehensible it would be from her end - without any sound or prior knowledge of what’s going on, visually speaking, 95% of this movie is just a man walking around talking to himself and getting sad sometimes. It’s almost like he’s acting out a one-man rom-com; there’s moments where it feels like he kinda hams it up a bit too much, but like, you kinda have to, right? He has to bring enough physicality to the story all on his own. It’s a role that demands an incredibly unique and specific performance, and I was pretty damn impressed how well he managed it.

The line that’ll stick with me?

“The past is just a story we tell ourselves.”

[valyrra]

Hi! Anon 🐈‍⬛ here, I need some advice, I'm going insane. I live in an opressive family, they behave like I'm not a person and they love to shut me up all the time when I have to say anything and even then they don't listen to what I have to say. They say that's because I don't have a job... (They love mentioning I'm jobless even though they KNOW about my state of mind)

I'm extremely depressed and scared to meet other people because of negative experiences. They conditioned me to stay silent and listen, but after years of silence I got sick of it and got more argumentative. For example: father (who is so obsessed with eating healthy that he made it everyone's problem) today made so much drama because we drank a sweet drink. He told us that it's deadly and told mother that she is the worst mother and started insulting her. It is not the first time he's doing this, he and her (sometimes) make us feel bad about eating something ("You will get cancer from it", "It's deadly", "You're going to get even more fat"), essentially shaming us for eating the food. We are not rich, we can't afford the "healthy" food and we live in a country that has food standards, we can't die from eating food or drinking a drink.

It was a lime flavoured powder that dissolves in water that you drink. It was a looooooooong time since we drank anything like that. He was very agressive about it and I'm on my second day of period so guess what happened. I got angry and told him what his problem is (we have been eating tasteless food for years because of his "Salt is death" (his words), he's obsessed with nutrients, TikTok recipes, and shoving his opinion on food and politics down everyone's throat) and mother and brother started shouting at me (brother insulted me as well) while he ate his lunch at peace. It's a constant cycle that never stops, he starts drama and threatening abuse, I intervene sick of his behaviour, they insult me, shut me up and it is peaceful until this cycle begins again for YEARS...

It was always like that, but since COVID it's getting worse and worse (there were times I almost k*lled myself from the stress), I have nobody to talk to...

He also almost k*illed us because of toilet paper on brother's 18th birthday, I had a horrible mental breakdown and was laughing and crying the whole time. My mental heath is so horrible that when I'm having a breakdown I start laughing (unfortunately like Joaquin Phoenix's Joker). Therapists are not that trustworthy because the one I had told mother about our sessions (what I said in them) and I stopped trusting them. People are snitches around me ready to tell any secret I have to other people. My trust has been broken so many times...

I'm telling you this because we are moots and you've been so kind to me even though we don't communicate much, however, you liking some of my posts and replying to my comments make my day.

I'm afraid to speak about this publicly (from my account).

I'm very very very very sorry for trauma dumping and grammar mistakes, I don't know what to do anymore, maybe I'm beyond saving, it has been going on for years, I'm tired...

Thank you for listening and if you ever need anything, I'll be there for you. I wish you all the best.

Anon 🐈‍⬛.

ok, first of all sorry that I am replying this so late. i'm glad that we are moots and somehow i help your state. don't be sorry for trauma dumping secondly, man, my mental health is like pretty fucked so i'm not sure what kind of advice you want from someone like me…. I'm like legit…….. not sure what can i propose to you besides what helped me to stay alive I've been abusive myself and I still am sometimes. it's kind of hard for me to talk about jobs and ED specifically, but like im not sure what age are you and what country are you in - i would certainly advice you to contact a specialist, even a local hospital (non commercial idk how it works anywhere outside of Russia). and probably its better to not tell anyone + tell the specialist that you'd rather keep this between you two. I've changed like 6-7 psychiatrists. some were bad, some were better. you just need to learn to trust. not all of them are bad Good prescribed meds can stabilize your brain in order not to fall into negative stuff. + somehow keep your nerveous system safer. which IMO is so important? like…. people usually don't realise how many health issues come from stress. from free stuff - sometimes guided meditations help me to relax and prevent incoming anxiety attacks like I think you should bit by bit build your own strength and overcome your fears. there's no one in the world who will make you do this shit, unfortunately. we live in a world where it's not always rainbows and sunshine, but you've been strong enough to live to this moment. i believe you can achieve your independence from your family. my first job was as a waitress and dude I've barely talked with anyone besides customers. only if it was necessary, all because i had like large anxiety and other stuff. it was hard as fuck, I've had drunk shitty customers who touched me and tried to kiss me, i've had a bartender who raised his voice at me like for smallest inconveniences. i had a cook who kept telling me he's going to r* me with his assistant because he was just dissatisfied with my performance lol. but like…… I've also made a great friends and built some social confidence. push yourself, no one will push you… to be independent is kind of a…. solution if you don't trust anyone. I hope you will find your peace.

[atlurbanist]

I've seen a lot, but this kinda rattled me.

The mayor of Alpharetta commented a correction to my tweet this about a pedestrian fatality north of his city to say, essentially, that 'this isn't my city's issue'.

No recognition of the tragic nature of the incident. No condolences for the family of the slain pedestrian. No statement about GDOT needing to create safer spaces near his city.

Just 'this isn't in my city limits.'

The WSB article identified the deceased as an Alpharetta man, so I included that place name in the tweet (which was my mistake; admittedly, I should have just said Forsyth County).

I assume the mayor searches Twitter for all mentions of the city and plays a game of comment-guy in his downtime. And I get that. I would probably do that too if I was a mayor. But for God's sake, man, read the room. Someone was killed.

GoFundMe for the family's funeral costs here:

https://www.gofundme.com/f/joaquin-vega-sauza

[auspexsims]

Well, I made it past one generation. As a voluntarily unmedicated ADHDer, I am simply shocked! To not break the flow of the content I've kept my thoughts mostly in tags, but I think I want to ramble a little bit once in a while, maybe at the start of each generation for anyone who's interested in thought process stuff!

One of the many rules I am respectfully modifying from the original challenge is the concept of male heirs only pre-1920s - we're close enough, with Olivia turning 18 in 1916 - but more than that, this first generation was special!

@agentoctosims and I have collaborated on Theodore and Talia for many years, and one of the things we've worked out in that time is their children, i.e. the fact they have 4, and their essential appearances and personalities. Beauregard, in my mind, has always been firmly aroace, and I wanted to honor that about him. Same with little Sulien, who will grow up and realize he is gay. Therefore this first gen... was kind of rigged from the start to not have a 'viable' male heir. And the wildcard of Olivia having a quietly spirited and ambitious (unplanned!) cousin Laurie has given her a life path that I didn't expect, that I think lends itself beautifully to an heir's story.

Aside from that as well, I know and @agentoctosims has told me how deeply Theo would regret having 'ruined' Talia's life. Talia has lived through many incarnations and universes, and to be perfectly honest, being stuck at home having kids and never seeing the world outside of Brindleton Bay is a bleak AU for her to be in. I usually have her casting spells, scaling mountains, becoming famous and exploring every continent - the life she led in this challenge is not true to her heart, and it's quite sad. I think I let myself be too influenced by how other people interpreted and started their Decades challenges, and in retrospect, I would have started her off more like herself - adventuring somewhere in Selvadorada, Victorian puff sleeves and all, and meeting Theodore through some unbelievable meet-cute abroad.

So, that being said, to be true to who Theo is as a father, he simply wouldn't be able to not give his daughters as many opportunities as his sons and encourage them to fly free in the way he feels his wife couldn't fly free. In that vein, I think of Joaquin Sorolla and his painting of his daughter - "Maria Painting in El Pardo" - and how he painted it after she recovered from tuberculosis enough to come out and paint with him again for the first time after her illness, one that absolutely could have taken her life. He turned his easel and chair in her direction, and memorialized that his little grown up apprentice was painting with him once more. Perhaps there was a time he thought they might not get that chance again. It moved me very deeply to learn that and see the painting in person. There have always been fathers in history who have poured their love and skill and ambitions into their daughters.

I hope to post more young modern Theo and Talia on this blog if it doesn't break the decades flow too badly? I've been chipping away at different AUs and appearances for them and they still remain one of my greatest inspirations. I don't regret using them to get my feet wet and slowly experiment with CC, Reshade, mods, etc in TS4, but their stories can be much better told now!

We'll see what tragedies Olivia discovers in the next 25 years! I am kicking myself a little that I made such a long goddamn family name, and it's going to go away within 1 generation, but... oh well :')

[tenderlady]

(Phantom Thread anon again) Yes exactly, that's J&Y! I can see it with the Master too, that same desire or need to hand over the reigns to someone else, something that John has alluded to in pretty much all the major relationships of his life (Mimi, Stu, Paul, Yoko). I think any good Beatles film would have to focus on just a fragment and my top choice would depend on what the angle was, but PTA would be a great choice for anything delving into their psyches not just because he's a top tier director but because so many of his films deal with Fucked Up relationships seemingly without judgement. He doesn't sanitise, but his characters are allowed to come across as charming despite the focus on dysfunctional elements.

Also while there's the obvious mommy issues thread, but a lot more that could be explored and isn't much about John's relationship with power in general, especially in the 70s. How he seemed to want it less the more he had it, especially from about '67 when he appeared to make conscious efforts to be less manipulative and even assertive. His old friends say he had to be the top dog in the early days which certainly isn't the John I saw in the Get Back sessions. That thing Harry Nilsson mentioned him saying about "powerful men" wanting to "swallow the world" and how he related it to his own physical appetite was very revealing imo. And how he often talked about "fat kings" (and Elvis specifically as the "fat king" fate he feared most) - I wonder how much of his disordered eating and preference for looking what most would consider too thin was rooted in those kinds of thoughts. And well, put all that together and the appeal of submitting to Yoko is blindingly obvious to me without the need for some evil witch magic to put him under her command!

Hey, bestie, welcome back! Always a pleasure to talk shop with a fellow Understander.

I totally agree with all of this, and I think you did a better job of picking up what I was attempting to put down with The Master than I did. The Master, while often read as a film about Scientology, is at its base a film about masculinity and control and power, which I think is what PTA is alluding to with the title. There is a real homoeroticism between Philip Seymour Hoffman's character and Joaquin Phoenix's character (I haven't seen the film in a hot minute, apologies for not remembering their characters' names), and a kind of Freudian taming of the id with Phoenix's almost animalistic lust and violence being tempered (and channeled) by Hoffman's superegoistic control. The scene where Hoffman essentially does Auditing on Phoenix reminds me a bit of Janov's primal scream therapy, with the idea that you have to completely break someone down to nothing in order to remake them in a stronger image. I also totally agree that PTA does a great job of portraying characters with complex psychologies in a way that neither demonizes nor exonerates them for their behavior, which are both problems that I think a lot of Beatlemovies (particularly focusing on John) fall into.

The thread of John and power/consumption/fatness is also really fascinating to me. The "fat king" archetype obviously seemed to stick in his craw, and I think Maureen Cleave comparing him specifically to Henry VIII really bothered him. Henry VIII was fat, but he was also violent, lascivious, and myopic in his understanding of the world around him. As with a lot of contemporaneous Beatles commentary, I think that John perhaps thought this hit too close to home and decided to course correct but, being John, overcorrected HARD. Like George, I think John had a real interest in asceticism and transcendence. At a point in time, John was probably the most powerful non-political figure in the world, and I think the trauma of that experience led him to desire a place where he could relinquish some of that control. Janov in particular seemed to place a lot of stock on being controlled by your desires (didn't Yoko pitch PST as a way to stop smoking?), and I think we see that fear of desire manifest in the life John built with Yoko in New York (macrobiotic, highly restricted diet; minimalistic decor; rarely leaving the house). I think the AKOM girls did a great job of looping that fear of desire re: Janov's work back to Paul, and I think you alluded to that as well in your original ask, but I think all of that coalesced into John's disordered eating, or pulled on the thought patterns that started this behavior back in the 60s. John wanted to be cared for, but especially in the 70s, I think we can see a distrust that he felt in his own desires, and a longing to be rid of them. George attempted to do that with Krishna, and John attempted to do that with Yoko/Janov/disordered eating/etc., etc.

This answer kind of got away from me, but I do want to say that you're totally right. Yoko was not practicing evil pussy magic; I think she just correctly spotted what John was looking for and stepped in to provide it, even if it was ultimately not good or healthy for either of them.

I need to go rewatch The Master, apparently.

[laurencna]

Open Your Future: Top CNA Classes in Stockton, CA for Aspiring Healthcare Heroes

Unlock Your ⁣Future: Top CNA Classes in Stockton, CA for Aspiring Healthcare Heroes

Are ⁣you ready‍ to embark on a fulfilling career in healthcare? As the demand for healthcare professionals continues to rise, becoming a Certified Nursing Assistant (CNA) is an excellent way to enter this rewarding field. In Stockton, CA, aspiring healthcare heroes have‍ access to several outstanding CNA training programs. This article explores the top CNA classes available, the benefits of becoming a CNA, and practical tips for your journey.

Why Choose CNA Classes in Stockton, CA?

Stockton’s diverse population and growing healthcare facilities create numerous job opportunities for CNAs. ‍By enrolling in a local CNA program, you can:

– **Enjoy Flexible Scheduling:** ⁤Many programs offer evening and weekend classes to ‌accommodate working students. – **Network⁣ with Local Employers:** Training ⁤close to home ‌allows for easier connections with potential employers. – ‍**Participate in Hands-On Training:** Local programs often include clinical practice at nearby ⁣healthcare facilities, offering real-world experience.

Top CNA Classes in Stockton, CA

Below‍ is a list of some of⁣ the best CNA training programs available in Stockton:

Training Program

Duration

Cost

Key Features

Stockton ⁣Adult Education

6 weeks

$1,400

Evening Classes, Clinical‍ Externship

Certificate of Completion at San Joaquin Delta College

8 weeks

$900

State-Approved,‌ Free CPR Training

Evergreen ⁣Valley College

10 weeks

$1,200

Hands-On Training, Job Placement Assistance

United Education Institute

4 weeks

$1,500

Fast-Track Program, Online Resources

Benefits of Becoming a Certified Nursing Assistant

Becoming⁤ a CNA is not just about entering the healthcare field; it comes with multiple advantages:

– **Job Stability:** The healthcare industry​ is projected to grow, ensuring a ⁢continuous ​demand for CNAs. – **Personal Satisfaction:** CNAs play a crucial ‍role in the lives of patients, providing essential care and support. – **Career Advancement ‍Opportunities:** Becoming a CNA can serve as a stepping⁢ stone to ⁣other healthcare careers, such as nursing or physical⁣ therapy.

Firsthand Experience: A CNA’s Journey

To illustrate the impact of CNA training, let’s⁤ hear ⁤from Sarah, a recent graduate of Stockton Adult Education’s ⁢CNA program:

“I enrolled in the CNA program at Stockton Adult Education, and it changed my life. The instructors were incredibly supportive, and the hands-on ‍experience I gained during my clinicals prepared me for my job at a local nursing home. I love being able ⁤to help people every day!”

This real-life experience demonstrates the value of CNA training programs and the positive outcomes they can lead to.

Practical Tips for Aspiring CNAs

When⁤ considering CNA‌ classes in Stockton, CA, it’s‌ essential⁣ to keep a few practical tips in mind:

1. **Research Programs Thoroughly:** Look for accredited programs that meet your needs and preferences. 2. **Consider Financial Aid Options:** Many schools offer financial ‍assistance for eligible students, making it easier to afford your training. 3. **Attend ​Open Houses or Information Sessions:** These events⁢ can provide insights into the curriculum and help you meet instructors and fellow students. 4. **Prepare for Hands-On Training:** Brush up on your physical stamina and communication skills, as they​ will be crucial during ⁣your training and eventual job.

Conclusion: Step⁢ into Your Future as a‌ CNA

Becoming a Certified Nursing Assistant⁣ is a rewarding career choice with ‍numerous opportunities for growth and fulfillment. The CNA classes in Stockton, CA, offer aspiring‌ healthcare heroes the training and ​support‍ necessary to succeed in this vital role. Whether you’re looking for‍ a stable job or a stepping stone into further healthcare education, investing in a ‍CNA program⁣ could be ​the key to unlocking ‍your future.

Ready to take‍ the plunge?⁢ Explore the available CNA classes today and start your journey toward making a difference in the lives of others!

For more information on ‌local programs, ‍resources, and support, consider reaching out ‌to ‍the⁢ schools listed above!

Start Your CNA Journey Today!

https://trainingcna.org/open-your-future-top-cna-classes-in-stockton-ca-for-aspiring-healthcare-heroes/

[stellaphlebotomist]

Open Your Future: Top Phlebotomy Schools in California for Aspiring Healthcare Professionals

Unlock Your Future: Top Phlebotomy Schools in California for Aspiring Healthcare Professionals

Are you ready‌ to embark on an exciting‌ career in healthcare? Phlebotomy could be your perfect gateway to a fulfilling profession. With the demand for skilled phlebotomists​ on the rise, particularly in a diverse state like California, ⁣honing your skills through a‌ specialized school can set you on the‌ path to success. This guide‍ explores the top phlebotomy schools across California and offers insights into the benefits of pursuing this career.

Why Choose Phlebotomy?

Before diving ‍into the best phlebotomy schools in California, let’s explore‌ why a career‌ as a phlebotomist can be rewarding:

High Demand: With⁢ the increasing need​ for medical services, phlebotomists are highly sought after in hospitals, clinics, and labs.

Quick Certification: Many phlebotomy programs can be⁤ completed in a matter of⁢ weeks, ‌allowing you to enter the workforce faster.

Competitive Salary: Phlebotomists earn a decent salary that can increase with experience and specialization.

Flexible Work Options: Phlebotomists have opportunities in various‍ healthcare ‍settings,‌ allowing for a diverse work environment.

Criteria for Choosing ⁣a​ Phlebotomy ⁤School

When selecting a phlebotomy program, consider the following factors:

Accreditation: ⁢Ensure the ⁢school is accredited by a recognized organization.

Curriculum: Review the program’s curriculum to ensure it covers essential topics and hands-on training.

Clinical Experience: Look for a ⁢program that⁢ provides real-world clinical experience through internships.

Job Placement Assistance: Some schools offer support in job placement post-graduation.

Top Phlebotomy Schools in California

Here are some ‌of the leading phlebotomy schools across California, each⁤ offering unique qualities and programs:

School Name

Location

Program Length

Tuition Cost

California State University, Los Angeles

Los⁣ Angeles, CA

12 Weeks

$1,000

University of California, San Diego

San Diego, CA

6 Months

$1,500

Pueblo ​Community College

Pueblo, CO (offers‍ online ‌options)

10 Weeks

$800

San Joaquin Valley College

Bakersfield, CA

9 Months

$1,700

West Los Angeles College

Culver City, CA

8 Weeks

$1,200

First-Hand Experiences: What Students Are Saying

Real experiences‍ from current and past ⁢students⁣ can provide valuable​ insights. Here are​ a few sentiments ​from students:

Emma J.

“The hands-on training at California State University gave me the⁣ confidence I needed to⁣ start my first job. I felt prepared for anything!”

Michael T.

“West Los Angeles College​ provided an amazing support system. The job placement assistance was fantastic!”

Sarah L.

“I loved the intimate class sizes‍ at San Joaquin Valley College. It made learning more personal and interactive.”

Benefits of Attending ⁤a Top Phlebotomy School

Attending a reputable phlebotomy school has numerous advantages:

Quality Education: You’ll learn from experienced instructors and have access to better resources.

Networking Opportunities: ​Build relationships within the healthcare industry that can benefit you in the long run.

Better Job Prospects: Employers often prefer graduates from reputable programs.

Hands-On Training: Gain practical experience that is invaluable for your ⁢career.

Practical Tips for Future Phlebotomists

Here are ‍some practical tips to ensure your success in phlebotomy:

Practice Your Skills: Utilize⁤ practice kits to sharpen your venipuncture⁢ techniques.

Stay Updated: Follow⁢ healthcare news ‌and advancements related to blood collection⁤ and handling.

Join Professional Groups: Engage with organizations like the National Phlebotomy Association for networking and career growth.

Conclusion

Pursuing a‍ career in phlebotomy is a commendable choice, especially in California, where numerous opportunities abound. By selecting the right ⁣phlebotomy school, you can equip yourself ⁢with the⁣ skills and knowledge needed​ to ‍thrive in this⁣ evolving field. Remember ⁢to consider factors like accreditation, curriculum, and clinical experience when making your choice. With commitment and the right education, you can unlock your‌ future in healthcare as a skilled phlebotomist!

https://phlebotomytechnicianprogram.org/open-your-future-top-phlebotomy-schools-in-california-for-aspiring-healthcare-professionals/

[heartswarm-void]

“Torres, please tell Birdbrain he forgot to pack the binoculars,” Bucky mutters, clearly annoyed. Joaquín shrugs.

—

“Yo, Torres, tell Robocop the extraction site’s changed. I’ll send the coordinates.” Joaquín sighs, rolling his eyes.

—

“Torres, would you please—”

“Jesus Christ, you guys know we’re all on comms, right? You don’t have to drag me into your lovers’ quarrel, I’m not a hotdog in the middle of your buns!” Joaquín screams, utterly done. There’s a long pause.

“Hotdog? Buns? That’s a strange metaphor, Torres,” Bucky remarks, matter-of-factly.

“I concur. That’s fucking weird,” Sam chimes in.

Joaquín does a facepalm. Kids these days.

[mattnben-bennmatt]

Ben and Casey Affleck's interview w/ The Washington Post (17 October 2007)

Bond of Brothers

By William Booth

-

LOS ANGELES -- Ben Affleck. Ben Affleck. Unfortunately, backward reels the mind. That lonesome whistle blows. The tracks. The train. The wreck.

Capt. Rafe in "Pearl Harbor." A role which will live in infamy. Then "Gigli." Stop. It hurts. Then "Surviving Christmas." And they say we don't torture people. One of his last movies, "Man About Town," wasn't even released in theaters. Can you imagine?

So it is with genuine human feeling, and a sense of -- what? Exhaustion? Relief? -- that we can announce that Ben Affleck has successfully directed his first movie, starring his very own brother, and . . . people are respecting it.

"A thoughtful, deeply poignant, splendidly executed film," says the Hollywood Reporter. Variety praised the movie's crisp acting and moral complexity, and said, essentially, it's all going to be okay.

Were it a pileup, you would have to avert your eyes. But it is good. Or at least good enough. And here comes director Ben Affleck now, ambling down the hallway of the hotel with his brother, the actor Casey Affleck, by his side. Casey, who works hard — beside Morgan Freeman and Ed Harris — in the gritty Boston detective thriller about a missing child, "Gone Baby Gone," which opens nationwide Friday (while Casey simultaneously appears opposite Brad Pitt in "The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford").

The brothers take up their positions on a couch.

Ben is dressed in a fantastically starched shirt. With his studio-white teeth and the manicured blue shadow of beard, he appears almost airbrushed, if not for the fact that his fly is open, which totally works. He looks adult, alert, suspicious.

As opposed to Casey, who is a furniture sprawler. He's married to Joaquin Phoenix's sister Summer. He's a PETA vegan. He looks as if he had just tumbled out of a laundry basket, canvas blazer over rumpled white shirt, which is how successful young Hollywood actors look. They wear sneakers. They put their sneakers up on the coffee table.

The brothers on the couch are three years apart — Ben 35 and Casey 32 — so Casey was a freshman when Ben was a senior at Cambridge Rindge & Latin School, the school for smart kids in Boston. "Growing up, we spent a lot of time together, same circle, same gang," Casey says. That gang included their friends Matt Damon and Aaron Stockard, who wrote the adapted screenplay for "Gone Baby Gone" with Ben.

"Tag, football in the street, Little League, basketball," Ben says. Message: normalcy. "We ran around and we rode our bikes. Our mom was a teacher, teaches fifth grade, still teaches; she's retiring next year. Same school. Our dad moved out. So we were a single-parent situation, single income, whatever you call it, and we went to public school and we had a fairly typical Boston kid life."

They lived in Central Square, which is just one stop on the T but a world away from Harvard, where their father worked as a janitor for a while. He had a drinking problem. All these well-worn worry beads of the Affleck family biography were widely disseminated 10 years ago during the successful Oscar campaign for "Good Will Hunting," which won the Academy Award for screenwriting for Ben and Matt, though people forget that Casey also appeared in the film as Morgan O'Mally, the foul-mouthed little mook.

"Our mother's best friend in town was a local casting director," Casey says. That would be Patty Collins. "We would get brought in to be extras or go on local commercials. That was my introduction to it. That's how I first remember knowing what an actor was. I played baseball until I was 15, but I wasn't good enough, really, so it was more appealing to go do summer musical that year, which was me and 19 girls. That was the first time I did theater. We had this amazing theater teacher who inspired everyone, and people fell in love with him, and anybody who had him wanted to be an actor. I dunno. Maybe it was same for Ben and Matt, too."

The drama teacher was Gerry Speca. Ben thanked him from the stage on Oscar night in 1998. He also put him in a scene at the end of "Gone Baby Gone," which is based on a novel by Dennis Lehane, the same guy who wrote "Mystic River," which also became a movie, directed by Clint Eastwood, which won Academy Awards for Sean Penn and Tim Robbins, which is obviously going to put the Affleck brothers in a position of comparison.

Ben remembers he read "Gone Baby Gone" in 2002 or 2003. That would be back in the Jennifer Lopez time, when things got a little weird. Ben thought the book might be adapted into a movie for him to act in. He began to very slowly write the screenplay with his high school friend Aaron, who would sometimes stay at his place, like Casey.

"Then I thought I might direct it, and if I directed it, I definitely didn't want to be in it," says Ben. "I was looking at the story and something was bothering me." The private eye in Dorchester, the tough-guy character Patrick Kenzie, was 40 years old in the script. "I didn't like the age he was. I couldn't find anybody to do the movie. What if he was younger? It made the movie better because it gave the guy some stakes."

Meaning stakes how?

"When something bad happens to you when you're 40, you get scarred," says Ben. "When something bad happens to you when you're 30, it changes your life. And as soon as I made the guy 30, I knew, like, this amazing actor who knew Boston, who I could get to, get a script to, who I could reach, and all of a sudden, things came into view. This is it. It's got to be Casey. This is the best person to play this part. By far. And I just happen to be lucky enough to know that because other people didn't understand that, because other people weren't exposed to him and his work the way I was."

Or as the review in New York magazine puts it: "Casey Affleck has never had a pedestal like the one his brother provides him, and he earns it." Because people might forget that Casey and Ben have appeared together in not only "Good Will Hunting" but "Chasing Amy" and "200 Cigarettes," and that Casey and Damon have been together in the "Ocean's" franchise, in numbers 11 through 13.

Did the studio, did the money people ever say, ummm, Ben, you're a rookie director, we don't think it's such a genius idea to cast your brother, who's never been a leading man, in your first movie? Casey is sitting there, politely, listening to this. Ben is nodding. "Yeah," he says, "I figured they're going to say to me, oh, he's your brother and there would be eye-rolling. Because I know Casey is so talented, but he's been having that Catch-22 problem. That he's not a star because he can't be a star if he can't get the job to be a star. I know he's had that struggle. But they trusted me, so I didn't even have to give my speech."

And what was it like to work with your brother as the director? "One of the things Ben does as a director is listen to other people's ideas and take the best and leave the rest. He's not territorial, a mistake I've seen other directors make, I guess, because they feel insecure about their position. Ben let them try their ideas, which makes them feel like their ideas are on the line. They invest more. But he's pretty discerning. Including some of my bad ideas, where he would go, like, I'm not going to do that."

Ben interrupts. "In terms of directing Casey it was just providing him with the best opportunity he could to succeed." Here he accelerates. "Doing whatever that took, creating that environment for Casey and whatever that meant, and keeping out whatever I had to keep out . . . " He's talking even faster. " . . . and allowing Casey to make whatever choices he wanted to make and, if he had an idea or instinct or experiment he wanted to try, doing what I could to let him try that, even if that meant holding off 10 other people who were going, 'What? No! We're not doing that!' That to me is directing."

Casey says this directing gig is harder than it looks. "It seems like a job of corralling," he says. "Where you have all these stubborn dumb cows, whatever, and you got to get them all in the same place." He moos. The Affleck brothers laugh. "But he's managed to corral some pretty big cows."

[laraphleb]

Leading Phlebotomy Schools in Fresno CA: Your Guide to Launching a Career in Healthcare

Title: Top Phlebotomy Schools in Fresno CA: Your ⁤Guide to Launching a ‌Career in Healthcare

Meta Title: Explore the Best Phlebotomy Schools in Fresno CA for ⁤a Successful Healthcare Career

Meta Description: Discover the top ⁣Phlebotomy schools in Fresno, California, to kickstart your career in the healthcare industry. Get valuable insights, tips, and ⁤resources to help you succeed in this rewarding field.

Introduction: Are you considering a career in healthcare and looking to specialize in phlebotomy? Phlebotomists play a crucial role in the medical field by collecting blood samples​ for testing, transfusions, ⁣research,⁣ and ⁢donations. If you’re based in​ Fresno, California, you’re in luck! Fresno⁤ boasts several top-notch phlebotomy schools that can help you acquire the necessary skills and knowledge ‌to excel in⁢ this field. In this guide, we’ll explore the best phlebotomy schools in Fresno CA, and provide you with essential information to kickstart your career in healthcare.

Top Phlebotomy Schools in Fresno CA: 1. Institute ​of Technology – Clovis 2.‌ Fresno City College 3. San Joaquin Valley ‌College 4.‌ Institute⁣ of Technology – Modesto 5. Kaplan College

Benefits of Pursuing a Phlebotomy Career: -‌ High demand for phlebotomists in healthcare settings – Competitive salaries⁤ and opportunities for career advancement – Fulfilling work that directly impacts patient care – Flexibility in work‍ hours and settings

Practical Tips‌ for Success: – Research different phlebotomy programs⁢ to find the best fit for your career goals -‌ Seek hands-on training opportunities to enhance your skills – Network with professionals ‍in the healthcare industry for job ⁣opportunities – Stay updated​ on the latest trends and advancements in phlebotomy practice

Case Study: ⁢Maria’s⁣ Journey⁢ to Becoming a Certified Phlebotomist Maria, a Fresno resident, always had a passion for helping others and decided to pursue a career in ​healthcare. After completing a phlebotomy program at Fresno City College, Maria gained hands-on experience through an internship at a local hospital. With dedication and hard‌ work, Maria became a certified⁤ phlebotomist and‍ now enjoys ‍a fulfilling⁢ career in healthcare.

First-Hand ⁢Experience: Jessica’s Testimonial on San Joaquin Valley College “I chose San Joaquin Valley College for my phlebotomy training, and it‌ was the best decision I ever made. The instructors were knowledgeable and supportive, and I received hands-on training that prepared me for real-world ⁣scenarios. I landed a job right after⁣ graduation and am grateful for the opportunities this program has provided me.”

Conclusion: Embark on a rewarding career in healthcare ⁣by pursuing a phlebotomy program in ⁤Fresno, CA. The top phlebotomy schools in Fresno offer ⁤comprehensive training, hands-on experience, and valuable resources to‍ help you succeed in this field. Whether you’re a beginner exploring healthcare⁢ careers ⁤or a professional looking to switch fields, phlebotomy can be a fulfilling and challenging career choice. Take the first step towards your healthcare career today by enrolling in a phlebotomy program in Fresno⁤ CA.

Remember, a career in phlebotomy requires dedication, attention to⁢ detail, and compassion for patients. With the right training ‌and guidance from‌ top phlebotomy schools in Fresno CA, you can build ⁤a successful career in healthcare and make a positive impact on the lives of others. Good luck on your journey to becoming a certified phlebotomist!

https://phlebotomycareertraining.net/leading-phlebotomy-schools-in-fresno-ca-your-guide-to-launching-a-career-in-healthcare/

[alannaw]

Date: February 16

Title: Tompkins, Chapter 8

Reflection: Learn something about the author of the assigned course reading(s) and use that to draw conclusions about the motivation behind the reading or the credibility/ quality of the writing.

Big Take-Away: Reader factors assist students in improving their comprehension skills.

Nugget: Many English language learners may struggle to understand content, because they lack the background knowledge.

Chapter 8 of Tompkins’ text discusses promoting comprehension with reader factors. It is essential to get students to a point of comprehension, because comprehension is the goal of reading (Tompkins, 2018). Throughout the chapter, it discussed various reader factors and how they are used. In order to demonstrate the importance of reader factors and comprehension, the author introduced three fifth grade students- one that is advanced, one that is capable, and one that is struggling- and got their take on why comprehension is important (Tompkins, 2018). By looking at those students’ abilities and their definitions of comprehension, it shows a linear relationship between skill level and understanding of comprehension. From reading this, I was interested in the author’s area of study and reasons for expressing the importance of comprehension. I found that Gail Tompkins is Professor Emerita at California State University, and also works with the San Joaquin Valley Writing Project. With the Writing Project, she works with teachers in their kindergarten through eighth-grade classrooms and leads staff development on reading, language arts, and writing. This information about her being rooted in reading and writing has given me a better understanding of her motivations for promoting comprehension through reader factors.

Tompkins, G. (2018). Literacy for 21st Century: A Balanced Approach. Pearson. 

[ace12325]

National Authors/Writer's in the Philippines

The term writer has been used as a synonym of author, although the latter term has a somewhat broader meaning and is used to convey legal responsibility for a piece of writing, even if its composition is anonymous, unknown or collaborative. Author most often refers to the writer of a book. Writers produce articles, reports, books and other texts. Writers are paid to write a variety of texts, including books and articles.

List of Filipino Authors/Writer's:

Nick Joaquin (1917–2004)

F. Sionil José (1924–2022)

José Rizal (1861–1896)

Gilda Cordero-Fernando (1930–2020)

Gilbert Luis R. Centina III (1947–2020)

Lualhati Bautista (1945–2023)

N. V. M. Gonzalez (1915–1999)

Nick Joaquin (1917–2004)

Winning the National Artist award for Literature, Nick Joaquín is probably the most esteemed writer the Philippines has produced. Joaquin came from a well-educated family and was published at the early age of 17. After winning a scholarship in a nationwide essay contest, he left the Philippines to study in Hong Kong.

Nick Juaquin Famous Work

The Woman Who Had Two Navels and Tales of the Tropical Gothic

On his return to Manila he worked for many years as a journalist, and his highly intellectual writing raised the standards of journalism in the country. Joaquin’s book, The Woman With Two Navels is essential reading in Philippine literature. However many of his short stories, such as “May Day Eve,” are extremely accessible and enjoyable for those new to the Philippines.

F. Sionil José (1924–2022)

A writer deeply concerned with social justice, F. Sionil Jose’s novels have been translated into 22 languages, and he’s one of the most widely read Filipino authors. Sionil Jose’s Rosales Saga is a five-volume work that follows the Samson family and their changing fortunes over a 100-year timeframe.

F. Sionil José Famous Work

My Brother, My Executioner

Sionil Jose’s books are especially illuminating for anyone interested in provincial life in the Philippines, the revolution against Spain, and the framework of the Filipino family. His anti-elitist views have made him a somewhat unpopular author within the Philippines, but Sionil Jose’s works are among the most highly acclaimed internationally of any Filipino writer. He won the Ramon Magsaysay Award for Literature in 1980.

José Rizal (1861–1896)

The Philippines’ national hero was also a prolific writer, poet, and essayist. Jose Rizal’s two novels, Noli me Tangere and El Filibusterismo were social commentaries that sharply revealed the injustices of Spanish colonization while praising the Filipino in his most natural state. The novels, which are surprisingly wry and romantic, crystallized the growing anti-Spanish sentiment and were banned within the Philippines.

José Rizal Famous Work

Noli me Tangere and El Filibusterismo

The execution of Jose Rizal at 35 years old set off the Philippine Revolution and paved the way for the country’s independence. Even without these dramatic events, Rizal’s books and his final poem, “Mi Ultimo Adios,” stand on their own literary merit, and have influenced scores of Filipino writers.

Gilda Cordero-Fernando (1930–2020)

Gilda Cordero-Fernando is a multiawarded writer, publisher and cultural icon from the Philippines. She was born in Manila, has a B.A. from St. Theresa's College-Manila, and an M.A. from the Ateneo de Manila University.

Gilda Cordero-Fernando Famous Work

The Butcher, The Baker and The Candlestick Maker

Cordero-Fernando has two landmark collection of short stories: The Butcher, The Baker and The Candlestick Maker (1962) and A Wilderness of Sweets (1973). These books have been compiled and reissued later as Story Collection (1994). Another book, Philippine Food and Life, was published in 1992. Together with Alfredo Roces, Cordero-Fernando worked on Filipino Heritage, a 10-volume study on Philippine history and culture published by Lahing Pilipino in 1978. Afterwards, she founded GCF Books which published a dozen titles that deal with various aspects of Philippine culture and society. Cordero-Fernando has also worn numerous other hats as a visual artist, fashion designer, playwright, art curator and producer. In February 2000, she produced a hugely successful extravaganza entitled Luna: An Aswang Romance.

Gilbert Luis R. Centina III (1947–2020)

Gilbert Luis R. Centina III was a Filipino-American Roman Catholic poet who won critical appreciation for his poetry books, novels, and a book of literary criticism. Apart from English, Centina also wrote in two Philippine languages and in Spanish. Over the course of his career, Gilbert Luis R. Centina III won several prestigious awards, including the Catholic Authors Award.

Gilbert Luis R. Centina III Famous Work

Rubrics and Runes

He taught literature as a professorial lecturer, served as a school chaplain for many years and as the first pastor of Filipino ancestry of Holy Rosary Church (Manhattan) in East Harlem, New York. Along the way, he authored hundreds of newspaper columns and magazine articles as well as edited a scholarly journal on St.

[critical-chris]

Knock at the Cabin (2023)

Guess who's back, back again. Shyamalan's back, tell a friend.

M. Night Shyamalan has returned to the big screen this winter with an apocalyptic thriller(?) to follow up his previous offering Old from 2021. This is the director's 15th feature film in a long career of ups, downs, and twists all around.

To qualify the following review, I am a massive fan of the thriller genre. For the longest time I did not watch horror movies and got my kicks from tense, dark mystery thrillers like Zodiac or A Walk Among the Tombstones (an underrated panned movie in my opinion). In fact, if you know of any good under the radar thrillers I should check out please let me know. That considered, you would think I'd be a fan of a filmmaker who has spent his entire career crafting mysteries in dark settings with god knows what hiding around every turn.

However, personally, I have not been a fan of M. Night Shyamalan's films for a long time. The last movie I remember liking of his was Split, and being immediately disappointed by the final installment of his Unbreakable trilogy with Glass, a complete mess from top to bottom that you could not pay me to revisit. Well, I suppose you could pay me but it's going to cost you a nice steak dinner at the very least. I like to be wined and dined before being bored senseless for two hours.

Split aside, I can break Shyamalan's career in my mind into two distinct parts: Fantastic First Watches, and Boring Bullshit.

*I have note seen Lady in the Water, The Last Airbender, or The Visit, so I won't include them (although I've heard the first 2 are awful)

Fantastic First Watches

This category encompasses most of Shyamalan's early successful work including The Sixth Sense, Unbreakable, The Village, and to some people Signs. I think Signs is a useless bore of a film with no tension, and would be unwatchable if Mel Gibson and Joaquin Phoenix were not in it. Debate me if you'd like, but the movie is terrible.

The first three films I mentioned are where M. Night Shyamalan made his name and earned himself the right to make whatever he wants. However, none of these movies are worth multiple viewings. I really enjoy Unbreakable and think that may be the only exception, as it is always great to see Bruce Willis and Samuel L. Jackson mentally sparring, but I wouldn't argue with you if you said you wouldn't need to watch it a second time. After the twist is revealed that Jackson is intentionally causing all the accidents throughout the movie on the off chance a superhuman exists, including the one that sparked Willis' journey to understand his hidden powers, you get it and you can move on without wondering how the movie would change if you re-watched with this new knowledge.

The Sixth Sense and The Village are both movies I have seen one time and have yet to desire seeing them another time. As with Unbreakable, once you know the twist the re-watch factor goes out the window. The Sixth Sense could be an exception for just a second watch I guess if you are looking for clues that Willis has been dead the whole time, but otherwise it's a slow burn drama with some creepy moments. The Village has no replay value to me. Holy shit, what a twist it was when you find out this village is hidden in a nature reserve and the leaders are essentially keeping their children trapped out of fear, but once I know there are just people under those red hoods why would I spend nearly two hours seeing it again? I won't, but at least these are all well-made films, unlike the next section of Shyamalan's career.

Boring Bullshit

The number of movies in this category for Shyamalan is staggering: Signs, The Happening, After Earth, Glass, and Old. These are all films that had me checking my phone to see how much longer I had to endure the drawn out, uninteresting plot and wooden dialogue.

I know a lot of people will disagree on my take on Signs, and I only saw it within the past year, but I find it boring, devoid of any tension, and ultimately unsatisfactory when the aliens finally show up. I don't think I need to mention my issues with the acting and story of both The Happening or After Earth. All I will say is oof, oof, oof.

Glass is an abomination, and one that stung so much deeper than the rest since I came into it with expectations. As I mentioned, I really like Unbreakable and Split, so the prospect of a trilogy-capping film pitting a near-human superhero and villian against each other by the proclaimed master of twists was exhilarating. However, what we got instead was a mish-mash of poor dialogue heavily featured and teasing an ending battle that satisfied nobody.

Old is exactly fine. The concept of people trapped on a beach that seemingly ages them at a rapid rate is interesting, but I'm not sure why Shyamalan treats the ending like a twist when he has made it obvious through the entire runtime. Also, foreshadowing a complaint I have for the latest release, I don't understand why Shyamalan feels he needs to cut away from violence in a horror film as much as he does. There is one particularly creepy scene here when Abbey Lee's body goes haywire, but otherwise everything you're waiting to see is stowed away off-screen. Part of horror is seeing the crazy shit actually happen, otherwise you can compartmentalize the crazy shit and it's not as frightening.

Anyways, I feel like I've spent too much time on the filmography of a director I'm realizing I will never be a fan of and should now focus on his latest offering, Knock at the Cabin.

Allow me to paint the picture. The movie opens with blurry, out of focus views of the woods, then one of our three protagonists Wen, played by Kristen Cui, a young girl catching grasshoppers outside of a cabin. Wen is then approached by a former wrestler stuffed into a short-sleeve buttoned down shirt, Leonard played by Dave Bautista. The camera claustrophobically keeps a close-up shot bouncing between Leonard and Wen's faces as Leonard befriends the small girl. Then, he says something creepy, and when Wen sees three other strangers approaching from behind Leonard, she fearfully runs into her cabin, revealing she is on vacation here with her two fathers.

Alright, I already have a problem here. M. Night Shyamalan has 14 films under his belt going in to this flick. Why are so many shots out of focus? And I don't mean one character is in focus and one is out; there are several examples of scenes in this film where the only thing in focus are the trees around the cabin even while characters are interacting, or the entire screen is literally blurry. WHY.

The fathers immediately lock all of the doors and windows (but for some reason don't close any blinds to the 200 clear glass windows in the place) to keep the intruders out. Leonard knocks (remember the title?) and tries to reason with them to let the four strangers inside, constantly referring to a 'greater purpose' that has brought them to the family's door.

The fathers are Eric, portrayed by Jonathan Groff (Mindhunter, Frozen), the sensitive weak and concussed husband, and Andrew, portrayed by Ben Aldridge (don't remember him from anything), the hot-tempered and uncompromising husband. They refuse to let the strangers in the house and proclaim to fight back after realizing all their phones and communication options have been wiped out by the intruders.

It takes all of five minutes effort for the four strangers to break into the house, Rupert Grint being beat to shit by Andrew as soon as he gets in, and eventually have the husbands tied up to chairs. Eric is knocked to the ground in the struggle to break in and suffers a concussion. The four intruders then line up in front of them, each in a uniquely colored shirt, with primitive staffs and tools in hand.

Right at this moment, the metaphor of these four individuals is clear. They have come to announce that the apocalypse is imminent, and they all have been chosen to carry out god's will. Obviously, they represent the four horsemen of the apocalypse referenced in the Bible. You know it, I know it, but Shyamalan thinks it's such a big secret that he literally has one of the characters say it out loud in the final minutes of the movie. I'm getting ahead of myself, but it really annoyed me that he had to be so on the nose about it.

The four horsemen tell the family they must choose one of the three members to be killed, but the strangers won't be the ones to kill them, it will be up to the other members of the family to carry out the sacrifice. Only this will stop the impending doom for the human race. Not only are the horsemen tasked not to harm the family, but they are going to kill each other one-by-one in order to 'release a plague upon the Earth'. Ughhhhhhhhhhhh.

Right there, you have removed all tension from the movie. I understand the threat is supposed to be the family causing the deaths of millions if/when these plagues are released, but the danger has now been removed from the cabin itself and only experienced on a television screen. Literally. Every time they ask the family if they are ready to decide who will be killed, are met with Andrew saying some form of "Go fuck yourself", and then executing one of their own horsemen, Bautista just turns on the news to show footage of a plague occurring in real time.

"But Chris, surely it would be scary when the strangers start killing each other in front of you." Yeah I guess, but you know from the jump they won't kill the family, so you are left with one of two conclusions to how the movie is going to go. Option 1: the four strangers kill each other until they're all dead, you find out they weren't telling the truth, and no harm no foul. OR Option 2: the four strangers kill each other until they're all dead, you find out they WERE telling the truth, and the family actually has to decide which of them they are going to kill. You would have to be the worst writer on Earth to make a thriller and choose option 1, so it is obvious how the film will pan out, and yet they have the stones to pretend like the ending is a twist.

The plot as the filmmaker has chosen to play out has no real tension and warrants no sympathy for our protagonists. After the second plague is released, a tidal wave that buries half of the West Coast, you are left with no doubt that what the horsemen are saying is true. this is like the halfway point of the film, and yet we are supposed to side with Andrew's angry selfish ass telling these strangers he'd rather see the entire world burn than admit what they are saying is true.

I could spend the entire blog talking about the plot holes in this movie, but will just run through my outstanding questions quickly here since they will never be answered-

What happens if the horsemen don't initiate the plagues? Would the apocalypse just never happen?

What is the reason for Rupert Grint's character being the one in the bar that assaults Andrew? Red herring? Why does Shyamalan think he can get away with a red herring in a plot so poorly thought out?

What is the reason for the flashbacks? They tell us nothing we don't already know about the characters by the time they come up, is it just for that song callback?

Here's something else that bothered me, this movie is rated R for absolutely no reason. This movie is also considered a horror movie, which makes no sense. The only true violence that happens in this film is when the horsemen execute each other in front of the family. Knowing this movie is rated R, you are expecting these executions to play out in horrific fashion, especially since the strangers all wield archaic tools and weapons. However, Shyamalan plays it like a PG-13 film and cuts away at each act of violence. You had the perfect opportunity to add a little shock to your movie and keep audiences on the edge of their seats by watching Rupert Grint's head get caved in, but like everything else in the movie you half-assed it. This is a glorified drama.

I suppose if I am forced to say something positive about Knock at the Cabin, I can commend Dave Bautista and the other actors for doing a fine, convincing job in their poorly written roles. You buy Bautista's sincerity, Grint's aggression, and Aldridge's passion. I hate that Rupert Grint went out as quickly as he did because I loved seeing him in the theaters again. Without them, this movie would be a complete drag.

Overall, I disagree with anyone referring to this as a return to form from Shyamalan, unless they are referring to the form he has held since 2005 which is characterized by unbelievable dialogue, thin plots, and underwhelming visuals. This is the definition of mid, and a complete waste of what could have been an interesting and engaging plot and cast. God I am so mad my time was wasted like this.

Knock at the Cabin - 5.0/10