#jesper thread.

[inkshadow]

random closed starter for @sunliights

".... fallon." he should've expected to bump into her at some point, what with how moderately sized their town is. this coffee shop, however, tended to cater more towards clientele who have their noses permanently turned upwards and jesper was no exception. "didn't think i'd run into you here." in code: it's good to see you.

[inkshadow]

❝ yeah, that's what i said. is that really so hard to believe? do you not want me to come home with fries anymore? ❞ as if that was the message of her mockery. his brows mimic hers, actually confused about where he might've gone wrong with the suggestion. if anything, he thought she'd prefer it. ❝ yeah, yeah, i know we will, ❞ jesper waves dismissively, popping another handful of fries. as different as their routine is and their general livelihood, tending to things later was thankfully common ground. they didn't butt heads nearly as much as they would if they weren't aligned. ❝ somewhere.. i mean, it's nothing google can't handle. should be alright as long as next weekend won't be too late? just because we buy the stuff, we'll still need to account for actually setting it up and decorating... ❞ grown up things, things he didn't think he'd be doing at this age.

"take the season off? mr sorry-i'm-late-babe-here's-fries?" fallon's eyebrows shoot up since she isn't entirely sure what to make of the suggestion. how serious he really is about his plans. "i know, i know! we'll get it all done, though." that was seemingly her life moto. we'll get it done with very little planning about when anything was supposed to happen. "there's enough time! i have a list of stuff we still need to pick up... somewhere... that's fine, right? we can always just move it next weekend. once i'm finished painting i don't think there's anything stopping us from setting the room up properly. i still need to sort all the clothes out..."

[the-wraiths-wife]

I'm starting a new thread abt the crow's insta stories.

First up, Matty<3

1# MATTHIAS

[knomelooking]

Love that films are finally giving men skirts, they deserve to feel like princesses

[crowshoots]

concept. three-way thread but its your muse, jesper, and a muse from my multimuse

[inkshadow]

❝ well, you should've known what you were getting when we kissed. ❞ given his aversion to anything serious, it was only natural to come to the conclusion that everything that night happened for fun. to save her from men with grubby paws who can't take no for an answer. the biggest surprise ( which remains a surprise to this day ) was how easy it felt to kiss her, like they should've been doing it all along. knowing that thought won't get them anywhere, however, jesper nods along and keeps his head down as he picks apart the rest of the meal, only to scoop each bit on his spoon again to clean his plate completely. to think he ever believed he wasn't hungry... or maybe it was kaori's food that always seemed to have him changing his mind. the conversation between her and her mother was comforting to listen to. while he may not have been privy to the details of her mother tongue, the tone more than made up for it. for once, the air around him feels full, warm... and wildly unfamiliar. his body prickles at the growing anxiety of properly introducing himself to someone's parent, having not spoken to his own in what feels like years. but he waits and listens intently, occasionally flashing a glance to see if he's missed a cue to chime in and say hello.

          " would you have really ? i feel like i gave you the go-ahead and then you just went emotional on me. felt like i was in some emotional rollercoaster. " she speaks up, not bothering to water down or mince her words, as she knew that out of everyone, she could be the most transparent with jesper. laughing against the palm of his hand as she's pushed back down further into the chair. " exactly, i think it was a pretty accurate description of you, in my humble opinion. " it was weird, she knew that he was just trying to protect her eyes in the event that she walks in on him and someone else, but there was a twinge inside her chest when he said that and she was scared to explore that feeling. a playful grin follows when he praises her cooking, " good to know. but i would argue that you should eat more, not that i'm trying to make you blow up or anything. i just feel like you don't enough considering your job. " she shrugs, fully aware that her cooking was great, knowing it was in her blood. " okay, let's do that. i'll let you know when you can say hi. i'm thinking i have to do some damage control first for letting her think i was withchild. " finally grabbing her phone nearby, she dials her mom's number and laughs when she immediately answers the call, switching to her native tongue, kaori engages in a casual conversation at first, assuring her mom that she wasn't pregnant.

[lessnearthesun]

I think if social media existed in the Grishaverse, someone on the Twitter equivalent would try to cancel Kaz for being a class traitor and then someone else would go “girl he’s literally a mob boss who kills people……he has worse problems” leading to huge debates. I just know Nina and Jesper are laughing their asses off. They definitely share the drama with Matthias, Wylan, and Inej, and probably also stir shit up for entertainment purposes. Kaz, of course, wouldn’t be aware of this because he doesn’t use social media, but I like to imagine that Inej tells him and he’s just like “well, I’m glad to see everyone agrees that I am a bastard for one reason or another 💅”

[storystartsanew]

"Sure, I made mistakes when I was younger. We all did! But now that I'm older, I've learned to make different, often far more serious mistakes."

[inkshadow]

continued for @decadentscribe from the source

"oh i have plenty of better things to do but right now i don't feel like doing any of them." and it didn't really concern her anymore what he was doing with his life. granted, the same could be said with the shoe on the other foot but he's already here and in her business and there's not much she can do to get rid of him now that he is. "me? threatened? you're joking, right?" genuinely, he's not. didn't even think that the guy that walked past him was even that attractive. "you really lowered your standards, you know."

[littlelightningbvg]

@lannamused gets a semi-plotted starter.

Kay had been out in the garden when she’d discovered it; an odd looking bug, sort of shaped like a grasshopper, that was about the size of her hand. The insect was nothing like she’d ever seen before, and in her excitement to show Wylan she’d hurriedly, and carefully, carried it in through the back door of the mansion into the kitchen.

“Wylan! Wylan, you have to come see what I found!” she called out and glanced up into the empty room. It took her a second to remember him telling her that he’d be going out for something, and that Jesper would be around if she needed anything. Well, she hadn’t met him yet, and didn’t know if he liked bugs or not… but there was always a chance he did.

As she stepped further into the room, the insect on her hand began to shift, and suddenly it leapt from her hand into the air, large wings fluttering as it took flight. “Woah!” Kay exclaimed, mouth falling open as she watched it head for the hallway. “You – You can fly! … no, wait! Hang on! Come back! You – You cant just fly away!” The critter landed against the hall wall for only a minute before it leapt off again, disappearing down the hallway and out of sight. Quickly she tried to follow after it, but wasn't fast enough.

”Oh no…” she whispered apprehensively, shoulders sagging and heart sinking. “I lost it. I lost the bug, and now I’m going to be in trouble.”

[averrse]

@gaerlhoss “ you think i don’t notice but i do.  i can tell something’s wrong.  ” (from jesper)

The first thought is that he's let Jesper get too comfortable with him.

He's made too many concessions--small and sporadic as they've been--that have culminated in this moment. The thought comes with the impulse to do something frightening. Something in this moment to remind Jesper of who Kaz really is, and what he's capable of, and after that, to rebuild a distance between the two of them. It would be easy enough to return to a time when one hard look from Kaz could make Jesper sit up straight and look away.

Kaz turns his glass in the ring of condensation on the surface of the table and sets that first thought aside for reasons that he won't think too much about now.

"And what is it you notice, exactly?" He flicks his eyes at Jesper, then away again.

[inkshadow]

❝ was enough to get your attention, right? ❞ and it's not like he's motivated to listen either, with the way his legs remain spread out like that. ❝ mmm, if i had a pussy, i'd prefer to be called squirtle. nice try though. the aching will stop once you quit picturing my cock stretching you out, slut. what did i want? a date. i'll pay you. my parents are supposed to attend one of my tournament celebrations for the first time in... ❞ never, but he just waves it off like he didn't care to remember. ❝ and i can't show up alone. thoughts? ❞

💌 NEW MESSAGE RECEIVED: @dysnomiias !

                ˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥         "you can stop with the manspreading, because your cock isn't blooming." trying to avoid staring directly at them, she grimaced. "shame you've no pussy, we could've called you vulvasaur. before you try anything, the spreading is making my vulva sore ... so, what did you want?"

[dvrast]

a thing about jesper is that he is constantly afraid. angry and frightened— that's what the fjerdan had called him. what had matthias and inej seen in jesper that he didn't understand ? / [ stop treating your pain like it's something you imagined. if you see the wound is real, then you can heal it. ] / you taught me to lie. [ to keep you safe. ] i had a gift. you should have let me use it. [ it's not a gift. it's a curse. it would have killed you the same way it killed your mother. ] i'm dying anyway, da. i'm just doing it slow. it's a genetic disease, father to son. inheritance. power, from his mother. fear, from his father.

it was one thing to be born zowa in his father's house, a weight impossible to tip - toe around with the old farm floorboards creaking under every step, something reaching deep down in his chest to hold his breath from a young age. it was that easy, as breathing, as long as it kept the fear off his father's face ; even easier, whispering truths like pearly whites tucked inside unassuming seashells with his mother. she was brave, braver than the both of them, and she made it easy, until she couldn't. after her death, colm's fear deepened, widened, and it swallowed jesper whole.

the world was always too small for jesper, too big, for grisha of any kind, an open range with traps and snares littered every few feet like landmines. you're born as prey animals native to every continent, or trained into predators in ravka. there isn't a single hill or meadow that's safe, not really. this is a part of why he leaves for ketterdam in the first place, no matter how afraid he is to leave his da, alone in a haunted house. but he can't stay there, not when it feels like the same thing that killed his ma is lurking under the floor, hiding in the rafters, breathing down his neck. but it wasn't the house. it was a part of him, some heavy, extra organ, and he takes it with him wherever he goes. it begins to feel like some kind of birth defect, something somewhere just a millimeter out of line, killing him slowly with every too - fast beat of his rabbit heart. sleeping, waking, this inescapable, primal paranoia. it'll kill him, just for being born.

jesper has what we would call generalized anxiety disorder on top of his attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, and it's at its worst once he realizes this feeling isn't something he can leave back home in his father's house. one could go mad with it, not a single place in which you can feel yourself, safe, whole, and he feels a little mad, at first, digesting this revelation ; this is his life, a blessed death. this is what it means to be zowa, his mother's son, his father's prodigal, home or far from it, everywhere, anywhere in the world. he can't ever catch his breath in ketterdam, since before even that, light and heavy all at once, a freedom you can only feel from falling. he feels like a dead man walking the streets, less to lose than even that, and it's easy, easy as breathing, to lay down what little money fit in his pockets with or without the promise of it earning any of it back. ketterdam is alive, though, and he learns quickly how fear is in the very air, but with it, an immunity in its people. something fearless in the water. it was almost inevitable, then, that the most fearless creature in the barrel is who jesper finds himself drawn to even more than the promise of a light burning brightest before it goes out, like a moth to flame. kaz brekker makes him feel like he could be brave for the first time since his mother. like he could survive.

fear is a lot easier to face if you don't ever look away in the first place. if you never come down from the high, there's never any crash - landing, and life with the dregs is a rollercoaster of ups and downs to simulate a freefall that's in his actions instead of his bones. joining the dregs, joining kaz, it gives a name to the grip in his chest— a false one, but a name all the same. he can't be afraid of living if he's dodging death left and right. this fear he has is for a bullet in his head, a knife in his back, dime lions or black tips or stadwatch or debt collectors instead of slavers or drüskelle or ravka or poisoned little girls in need of saving or his father's scared, scared eyes— ketterdam is where taking a deep breath could get you killed anyway, and it's the first place he feels he can live in. the first place he feels he could survive, because living in ketterdam demands it.

[sunliights]

continued for @dysnomiias​ from here.

     she took the bait. teeth bite down on lower lip in thought, his eyes scanning her face in a panic, unsure of what to say now when he’s on the brink of hurting her again. ❝ yeah i kissed you but that was such a long time ago and we were both drunk and i was hyped up on adrenaline after punching your shitty ex. why are you so stubborn to be with someone who will only disappoint you??❞

“right, so you didn’t do it because you like me. if you don’t like me then say it instead of palming me off with excuses about why you did do it.” fallon supposed it was only a matter of time until she had to put him into the position where he fully rejected her. perhaps then she’d get it into her mind. “i just really don’t think you’re as bad as you make yourself out to be, that’s all.”

[exiitiosus]

& clary fairchild. 〃 @masterwcrk

→ [ 📱 — clary ] would you see that, you just mispelled the BEST → [ 📱 — clary ] goo thing i caught that :p → [ 📱 — clary ] now you got me curious. how are you faring in the ranks? → [ 📱 — clary ] tho, i'll let you know i'll be worried if you have a high number → [ 📱 — clary ] hey hey, a guy can dream and pretend to be blissfully ignorant about it → [ 📱 — clary ] especially when i can feel a headache coming if kaz was to get on my case → [ 📱 — clary ] c'mon, i have a comment for everything, don't i? → [ 📱 — clary ] . . . i feel like i just stepped into a trap → [ 📱 — clary ] was all of this a complex ploy to get me to spend time with you? → [ 📱 — clary ] because you just needed to say the word and i would have been outside your place :p

[deareclipse]

˗ˏˋ @theybolted sent "62 - jesper & wylan" » mmmh by kai. ˎˊ˗

"take my jacket and put it on," he states, "my shawty that’s not your fault. just come into my arms, destroy me if you want."