#jes tom less lonely

[thequeereview]

Exclusive Interview: stand-up comic Jes Tom on Hannah Gadsby's Gender Agenda Netflix comedy special - "I am your new queer best frenemy"

New York stand-up comic, writer, and actor Jes Tom follows a sell-out Off-Broadway run of their acclaimed solo show Less Lonely (presented by their friend Elliot Page) with a hilarious set as part of a lineup of seven genderqueer comedians in Hannah Gadsby’s Gender Agenda. The comedy special, which was shot at London’s iconic Alexandra Palace last year, launched on Netflix this week. Named by…

[qnewsau]

Hannah Gadsby drops lineup of Netflix special Gender Agenda

New Post has been published on https://qnews.com.au/hannah-gadsby-drops-lineup-of-netflix-special-gender-agenda/

Hannah Gadsby drops lineup of Netflix special Gender Agenda

“The last time Netflix brought this many trans people together, it was for a protest. So, progress,” Hannah Gadsby jokes in their new genderqueer comedy special Gender Agenda.

The Australian comedian signed a big deal with Netflix in 2022, after publicly slamming the streaming service for its handling of celebrity transphobe Dave Chappelle.

But at the time, Hannah, who uses they/them pronouns, had a request: that Netflix create a stand-up special featuring genderqueer comics from around the world.

That project is now titled Gender Agenda, and arrives on Netflix on March 5 with Hannah hosting and a lineup of seven performers.

They are Jes Tom, Alok, Asha Ward, Chloe Petts, DeAnne Smith, Krishna Istha and Mx Dahlia Belle.

Jes Tom has written for queer favourite Our Flag Means Death and recently wrapped the Elliot Page-presented one-person stage show Less Lonely.

Alok headlined the NYC Comedy Festival in 2021, and has appeared in Cara Delevigne’s Planet Sex and Netflix’s Getting Curious with Jonathan Van Ness.

Asha Ward is best known for being Saturday Night Live‘s youngest-ever writer.

Chloe Petts is currently touring standup show If You Can’t Say Anything Nice.

DeAnne Smith featured in Netflix’s Comedians of the World and is a regular on the Australian comedy festival circuit.

Krishna Istha was a writer for Season 4 of Sex Education and is currently working on a trilogy of performance pieces about trans motherhood.

Mx Dahlia Belle founded the Portland Queer Comedy Festival and took on Dave Chappelle in a high-profile open letter in 2021.

Hannah Gadsby explains Netflix stand-up special

Hannah Gadsby told Variety, “There is such a wealth of brilliant genderqueer comics out there, but such a dearth of representation on the major streaming services.

“Meanwhile jokes about trans people are becoming more and more lucrative.

“So it seems only right that at least some of those jokes be told by actual trans people themselves.

“I am beyond thrilled to bring this lineup together, showcasing seven extraordinarily talented comics and to use my platform (and Netflix’s…) to hopefully help catapult them into the spotlight that they deserve.

“They (and I mean ‘they’ in every sense of the word) are some of the funniest, smartest genderqueer comedians from around the globe, and it was an utter delight and true honor to share the stage with them.”

Back home, Hannah’s new solo stand-up show Woof! tours Sydney and Melbourne in March and April.

Lots more on Hannah Gadsby:

‘Amoral algorithm cult’: Hannah Gadsby rips Netflix

Hannah Gadsby signs new deal for more Netflix specials

Hannah Gadsby talks their marriage with ��spouse lady’ Jenney

For the latest LGBTIQA+ Sister Girl and Brother Boy news, entertainment, community stories in Australia, visit qnews.com.au. Check out our latest magazines or find us on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and YouTube.

[picturethisshow]

#NY It's time to give thanks for another year of live animated comedy at our FINAL NEW YORK SHOW OF 2023!!!

Comedy by:  Jes Tom (Less Lonely) Griffin Newman (The Tick) Eman El-Husseini (JFL) Jess Salomon (The Best Show) Wilfred Padua Animation by:  Jason Chatfield (National Cartoonist Society) Chrissy Fellmeth (Titmouse) Emmett Goodman Adam Howard Dima Drjuchin Dan Pinto Hosted by:  Jason Chatfield (The New Yorker)  TICKETS: $10 pre-sale, $15 day-of/at the door  

at Union Hall (702 Union St, Brooklyn, NY 11215)

Masking HIGHLY encouraged when not actively eating or drinking.

21+, Street Parking available, ride share encouraged

Lineup subject to change without notice

Flier art by Jason Chatfield

[terebi-me]

Whale oil.

I can't believe I didn't think of that.

[ghostsandmermaids]

It is intentional!! Jes Tom, one of the writers, said this in an interview:

I'm just curious since I absolutely adore all your trans Ed fics, what made you read Ed as being trans? Is it more of a personal headcanon since we tend to see ourselves in fictional characters, or did you notice some tiny detail on the show that made you think so?

Oh my friend, I'm so glad you ask.

The cool thing about reading Ed as trans, I think, is that you do not even have to squint to do it. Literally you need to change exactly nothing, and this read suddenly adds a lot of nuance and additional juicy layers to his story and his journey with masculinity.

Ed's whole deal with masculinity, precisely exactly all of it, makes him feel so much like a trans guy who never outgrew the "I need to be hypermasculine so I pass" phase, fitting that read so precisely that given there are trans writers on the OFMD team I would be absolutely SHOCKED if at least some of it wasn't intentional. Every single trans guy I know has been through a version of this, where you come out and you know you're a man but you need everyone else to know, too, and so you lean very hard into masculinity to make damn sure you pass. And not just pass, but pass perfectly. Ed is forcing himself into such a heavy ideal of masculinity that it feels artificial; he needs to make sure everyone sees him as this perfect ideal of a masculine man that he cannot possibly live up to because no one could.

Certainly, parts of Ed's hyper-masculine presentation seem to be things that genuinely make him happy and bring him joy. That's important. Ed's happy to be a man, the problem is that he's trying to force himself into such a narrow idea of masculinity that it's stifling him. It's preventing him from enjoying more ""feminine"" things that he genuinely loves, because he's terrified of being seen as less of a man for it, and people like Izzy reinforce the idea that if Ed fucks up in his performance of masculinity, he's going to be in danger because of that. It's very real, and the added juiciness from reading Ed as trans adds so much to the great story that's already there, I think. There's this additional element of Ed knowing he's a man but needing to make sure everyone else could never doubt it, there's an additional perceived danger to slipping up, there's a sort of jealous admiration for guys like Stede who seem, at least on the surface, so much more comfortable with a different type of masculinity that Ed wishes he could have more of.

And on top of that, there's just a lot of other little additional things, like:

Ed making his beard his whole brand, it just screams beard dysphoria and "no one could ever claim I'm not a man because the beard is my whole THING."

Something about his relationship with his name, and how hard he has to try to get people like Izzy to call him by his name in front of others

The way Ed is dehumanized when he dares to step outside a very safe, masculine gender presentation - it's why Izzy saying "this thing you've become" when Ed is wearing a robe and painted nails hits so hard for me, I think

Okay. okay. listen. You know the scene where Ed makes CJ whip him in the balls. Listen. Ed baby. It just SCREAMS "people here don't know I'm trans and I don't know how much getting hit in the balls should ACTUALLY hurt so I'm gonna lay it on really really thick just to be safe"

There's a lot to be said about Ed and his clothing in a lot of directions, but I'm gonna leave it at how he's really figured out a safe set of clothing that works for him and consistently allows him to be read as this super masculine guy, and he's scared to step away from that. Also, I really like imagining the full-fingered gloves at the end of s1 as a way to cover up the nail polish on his fingernails until it wears off.

I think it's very sweet that Ed tends to be very private when talking about his personal and sex life with others, but a very, very easy explanation for how that got started is he just doesn't want to go around sharing personal details about his body with people!

Yeah. A trans read of Ed is so shockingly easy, fits so well, and adds so much to his journey, frankly I'm amazed it's not more common.

[stan-holland]

Frenchie -- Tom Holland x French (Female) Reader

To my French anon: I’m sorry it took me three months to post this. 

This is (maybe) a part one of a series. Feedback would be wonderful. Let me know if you want a part two. x

“Look, I need to get to Sunset soon, will the car be coming or not?”

“I’m sorry ma’am, I can’t understand you.”

You huffed and used your hand to comb through your hair, “Sir, will the car be coming or not?” You were frustrated and the weather wasn’t helping either -- who knew California could honestly feel this hot?

“No, we don’t have any cars available right now ma’am.” You watched as the man continued to press some keys and you noticed his brow furrowed. “I’m so sorry ma’am. It’s just that, considering it’s a national holiday, things are overbooked for a couple of hours.”

You felt your face heat up in frustration and looked around the hotel lobby to make sure no one was about to see you burst into a frustrated fit.

“What I can offer you, however,” he continued, “Is a complimentary lunch at the hotel’s restaurant. We know it’s not much, but we have some very appetizing meals.”

You checked the time on your phone, 13:45, and decided that was probably the best thing that was going to happen today -- at least until Uber rates went down again.

“That would be fantastic. Thank you.” You tried your best to smile politely and hoped the hotel staff didn’t hate you too much.

“Right this way ma’am.” And he held his hand out, showing you the way to the restaurant.

‘There could be worse things than eating alone’ you thought to yourself. ‘You could be eating with someone who isn’t hilarious.’

You laughed to yourself, but quickly recomposed yourself when you remembered you were in a public place. You took this time, however, to look around the room for other interesting people.

As you looked around, you started laughing as some guys started putting straws up their noses and ears. You couldn’t help but snort a bit when one of them took the straw out of his ear and put it into his friend’s drink.

“You can’t do that Jacob!” shouted one of the guys. You tried to sip your water but decided against it when you saw them all poking their straws in each other’s drinks.

Suddenly, your phone started ringing incredibly loud in the room -- you fumbled around in your bag for the device before answering with a terse, “Bonjour?”

“Ça va?” you heard your best friend muttering on the other line.

“C'est pas trop tôt!” you practically shouted, “Pourquoi ne m'avez-vous pas rappelé plus tôt?”

You’re friend laughed and then sighed, “Je suis occupé. C'est ma seule pause pour les trois prochaines heures. C'est un gâchis ici.”

“Semble terrible,” you replied.

“Well I’ve gotta run, I’ll call you back later, oui?”

“Oui! Au revoir.” You hung up but smiled as you locked your phone. It felt good to hear your friends voice. As you zipped up your bag again, you freaked out when you heard the chair in front of you open. It scared you, even more, when you saw that the cute boy from the other table had come over to sit in front of you.

“Can I help you?” You hoped your accent wasn’t making it difficult for him to understand your slight discomfort.

“Bonjour!” He smiled and you were taken aback by the French word coming from his mouth.

“Bonjour?” You hesitated to put your hands back on the table, gripping your purse a bit tight in case you needed to bust out of the restaurant. “Puis je vous aider?”

“Umm…” He hesitated a bit and then questioningly said, “Oui?”

You smiled a bit -- this guy didn’t speak any French but you figured you could embarrass him a bit before he trotted back to his friends. “Cela a-t-il à voir avec votre mauvaise odeur?”

“Oui!” He smiled ecstatically. “Oui! Oui! Oui!”

You laughed and threw your head back as you did. This kid was on something else. You leaned in a bit and stated, “So it’s you that stinks then, yes?”

He started blushing and his ears got pinker than they were before. You glanced over to his friends and laughed at their laughter and their incapability to be subtle.

“No, no, no.” He continued laughing at himself and sat up a bit, “My friends wanted to either come sit here and just spat bullshit at you or go over to that couple--” he points to some older people sitting in the corner, “and ask if I could borrow $100 to pay for my meal.”

“Well,” you said and you fiddled with the straw of your cup, “I’d prefer this to you bothering some nice people.”

“Are you saying you’re not nice?” He smirked when you looked him dead on. You smiled too but breathed in deeply.

“You’ll just have to wait and see won’t you?”

His smile grew bigger and he held out his hand to you from across the table. “I’m Tom, by the way.”

“Y/N.” You smiled when his cold hand slipped into yours. He held it as he stood up.

“You should meet my friends, come on.” He let you go and reached out for your plate of food. You reached for your cup, but he used his other hand to halt you from doing that.

“I wouldn’t do that!”

“Why not?” You asked.

“I might or might not have put that straw in my ear…”

“I hope you know that I already dislike you, Mr. Tom.”

He laughed and turned around to walk to the table. “We’ll see about that.”

“Wait, wait, wait,” You had to pause to catch your breath, “All three of you stole the golf cart and all three of you nearly sunk it in the lake?!”

They busted out laughing harder. Jacob held his hand to his chest, “It was Harrison! He can’t drive! You’re terrible!”

Harrison sputtered a bit but continued on, “Okay, yeah, maybe. But who was it that dropped that entire box of muffins when we stole them from the dining tent in Atlanta?! You had one job, Jacob!” 

You continued laughing at the antics and continued to quarrel over who was the worst human being at the table. 

Tom’s phone received a notification, but you and Jacob laughed as Harrison tried to defend himself once more. 

“Hey,” Tom said, reading something off of his phone as he did so. “Just been invited to some house party tonight. Should we go?” 

Considering you had just met these guys, you figured the invite wasn’t stretched to include you. 

“I’m down,” said Jacob.

“I’m definitely in,” said Harrison.

There was a silence before Tom coughed and looked at you. “You in?”

A smile spread across your face, “I’m definitely in.” 

Everyone at the table whooped -- LA was about to get less lonely. 

[mojput-mypath]

Wind of Change/Vjetar promjene

ENGLISH FIRST - scroll till the end for some nice pics

HRVATSKI ISPOD ENGLESKOG

Reading time: 7 minutes, 14 seconds

FLASH NEWS

Is there a day with no news from me?

One day it's up One day it's down One day it is.

Like Jessica Jones says (a Marvel heroine): Start from the beginning.

I came to Zagreb. Then went away for the weekend to the seaside. Someone asked me: since when have you been in Zagreb? I could not say. I tried to figure it out according to how many rents I paid, but that was not entirely correct, as I was here before I got my place for a few weeks, and then I was in Germany in between.

I cannot really follow where I was, nor where I am going. I went from one city to another, spent an hour and a half there, and came back. It is not so hard to travel Croatia, like it used to be.

Rijeka, Croatia

ETERNAL QUESTIONS

Who am I, where am I, what am I to do, what is really important? The world outside of the ashram is quite complex.

In the ashram, you have this one thing that keeps pressing on you, and it keeps pressing on you from all sides, until it squeezes yourself out of yourself.

Here, on the outside, a lot of things press on you, sometimes more, sometimes less in phases. Fires come up on all sides. One calms down, while another bursts out. Juggling!

I’m doing coffee hangouts, lunches, concerts. Sing, play, breathe – the usual. I am working on quite some projects, most of them interesting and most of them online. Now, I seem to be, like they say in the modern world – a freelancer. I work on projects, people are paying me. Offering me new projects. One project keeps me connected to Zagreb, but I still have some flexibility of movement. That’s how it is, once you get all you wanted to have for so long, it seems it arrived so naturally, that one cannot even perceive it is some great success. It took some time, I wished for this for a long time, I worked in that direction, but I cannot really say that I am responsible for things being as they are now. It happened, what do I know how it happened. The intention just manifested.

Now that the intention has manifested, it’s all fine and dandy, but it came naturally. I didn’t ruin myself in order to get here. It just happened. It wasn’t me, for real.

IT WASN’T ME

I don’t know if this is humble of me, or stupid of me, but I don’t feel I deserve to have credit for the situation I am in. Not only that, but all this doesn’t seem to be so special, like I dreamt it would be. Life should not be a search for happiness, but an expression of happiness, Guru says. Every moment is fulfilling, every moment holds happiness. Not tomorrow, not the day after tomorrow, not when I will have, when I will know, when I will feel like this and like that. Postponing happiness is crap. Expressing happiness in every moment is enlightenment. Life is somewhere in between. It is good to have reminders, when we fall into a particular version of our own reality, and put an ultimatum on our own happiness and contentment. When the ultimatum is fulfilled – happiness. When it is not – unhappiness. In my world, I call this slavery. I admit I am a slave. A slave of my own creation. A slave of my own mind.

I am not trying to be negative, just realistic. If there is such a things as realistic.

The enthusiasm and love I had in life for the things I did brought me disappointment and discontentment. I am serious. I used to things with so much love, in spite of the work being unsatisfying and less than my skills and knowledge capacity, I expected the work to bring me growth and happiness. I expected the work to bring results. Results I expected. But, the results came as disappointing. I wanted to save the world and be a part of a change. I have not saved the world, nor am I a part of any change. I had this idea how all this should look like, but in the end it didn’t.

Let me elaborate. You work on a project, you work hard. You work with love and enthusiasm, expecting the world and the divine to support you. And it does. But not in the way your “noble work should be rewarded and supported”. Then you get sad – why all this good work is not really working out? Then the disappointment. If I had not expected much, I would have been happy with what I got. As I expected GRAND things, and got scraps – it made me feel insignificant and lonely. So, who cares what the results will be, I just need to live life now, without so many projections that rarely get to become what we thought they would.

Island Brač channel/Brački kanal

ORDER, WORK, RESULTS

I am here now! My things are here now, not all of it, but most of it – and that means I am here.

I took over an apartment in Zagreb, from a friend, and I’m working on it to make it look nicer with the least cost and as best I can. It’s a bit of a project, but nothing is impossible for the Super-Woman-Goga-Yoga. Why would things in life be easy. That’s super boring. I put my stuff into its place, and cleaned dirt layers, but I did not paint the flat yet, so who wants to, can come and work with me. It’s an open invite!

And so I keep thinking to myself, like usual. Thinking and thinking – is all this right, am I good, is the world fine? The world seems to take last place at the moment. I thought to myself, I have been caring and worrying about the world for too long. The planet is still spinning, people are still eating and bearing children. Everything seems to be under control, not mine though.

Just the other day I was commenting with a colleague how everything has changed. From doing things out of love and good will, everything changed into money, branding and marketing. That is how it is now. There used to be more time and less technology. Now, there is more technology and less time. People are turning into machines. They mechanically perform their daily tasks, caring for themselves and others. The more tasks and obligations, that much more we worry and burn out. We are already in that phase where we need to seek out time in order to find peace.

Are you finding time? Are you finding peace? Where are you in a hurry to go? What are you afraid of?

FEAR

What would you do if you weren't afraid?

I just saw this quote on social media.

And I thought to myself. What would I do?

I would travel the world playing my guitar and singing mantras.

I would not have people criticising my work in not a nice way.

I would spend more time on a beach sipping coconuts and meditating.

I would jump off a plane, even though I am terrified of heights.

I would go to India with no other agenda, but to eat idlis at amma's.

If I weren't afraid, I would honestly tell people how shitty they can be. And if I weren't afraid, I would not be hurt when people are honest with me about how shitty I can be.

I would ask for money to pay off my debts.

I would crowdfund for something selfish.

I would probably be in a relationship.

I would be someone different if I weren't afraid.

I would be free of vice.

And that is why I will stick to my fears and stare at them to make them go away. I might give them a big hearty hug beforehand, and thank them for sticking it out with me.

Olive grove, island Brač/Maslinik, Brač

REMINDER TO SELF

All your negative emotions are just energy stuck in places it is not supposed to be stuck in. In order to get them out of my system – is to meditate. Every other mental exercise I have been stretching myself to do is quite useless. It brings me back to where I was – worried. Worry is a negative emotion and it can be removed by acceptance and release – on an energy level. The mental level, the brain, the monkey just jumps around. It doesn't get things done, it doesn't bring relief. It brings denial and more worry.

MEDITATE!

Or do whatever other thing that takes a break on the useless mental activities. The other stuff the brain does can be useful, but if it takes over… I'll be making another What I would do if I weren't afraid list.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________

HRVATSKI PRIJEVOD:

Vrijeme čitanja: 5 min, 59 sek

NAJNOVIJE VIJESTI

Ima li dana kad kod mene nema vijesti?

Jedan dan je gori Jedan dan je doli Jedan dan je.

Kako kaže Jessica Jones (Marvelova junakinja): Počni otpočetka.

Došla ja u Zagreb. I otišla na vikend. Došla ja u Zagreb i otišla na more. Pita me netko: Otkad si u Zagrebu? Nisam znala reći. Orijentirala sam se po stanarinama koje sam platila, ali to nije sasvim točno, jer sam i prije toga bila tu par tjedana, pa otišla u Njemačku, pa se vratila.

Ne pratim više gdje sam bila, niti gdje idem. Onako, sa strane. Otputujem iz jednog grada u drugi, tamo provedem 1,5h i vratim se nazad. Nije ni Hrvatskom tako teško putovati kao što je nekad bilo.

VJEČNA PITANJA

Tko sam, gdje sam, što mi je činiti, što je važno? Svijet van ashrama je mnogo kompleksan.

U ashramu imaš jedno nešto što te stišće, pa te stišće na puno načina istovremeno, dok te ne istisne iz tebe same.

Ovdje te stišće puno toga, u manjoj ili većoj mjeri i to periodično. Upale se vatre razne. Pa se jedna malo stiša, a druga pojača. Žongliranje!

Idem na kave i ručkove, druškanja, koncertić. Pjevam, sviram, dišem – kao i obično. Radim razne projekte, svi zanimljivi i skoro svi online. Sad sam ti ja, kako se ono kaže u modernom svijetu – freelancer-ica. Radim projekte, svi mi nešto plaćaju. Nude mi nove projekte. Imam i jedan dio koji me veže za Zagreb, ali ne pretjerano, imam fleksibilnost kretanja. I tako ti je to, kad dobiješ sve što si dugo želio, došlo je tako prirodno, da ni ne vidiš to sad kao neki veliki uspjeh. Dugo je trajalo, dugo sam to željela, dugo radila u tom smjeru, a opet ne mogu reći da sam samostalno zaslužna za to kako je sad. Dogodilo se, otkud ja znam kako. Namjera se manifestirala.

Sada je namjera manifestirana, i tako ti je to sve super i lijepo i krasno, ali prirodno je došlo. Nisam se ubila u tom smjeru da bih dobila to što imam. Dogodilo se. Nisam ja, majkemi.

Sutivan sunset, island Brač/Sutivanski zalaz sunca, Brač

NISAM JA

Ne znam je li to skromno, ili glupo od mene, ali ne osjećam zasluge za situaciju u kojoj se nalazim. I ne samo to. Već mi ne djeluje da je to nešto tako posebno, kao što sam dugo sanjarila da je. Život ne bi trebao proći u potrazi za srećom, već biti izraz sreće, kaže Guru. Svaki trenutak je ispunjen, u svakom trenutku je sreća. Ne sutra, ne prekosutra, ne kad budem imao, kad budem znao, kad se budem osjećao tako i tako i tako. Odgađanje sreće je sranje. Izražavanje sreće u svakom trenutku je prosvjetljenje. Život je negdje između. Dobro je imati podsjetnike, kad se uljuljkamo u neku svoju stvarnost i stavimo si ultimatum na sreću i zadovoljstvo. Kad je ultimatum zadovoljen – sreća. Kad nije zadovoljen – nesreća. To se u mom svijetu zove robovanje. Priznajem da sam rob. Rob vlastite kreacije. Vlastitog uma.

Ne pokušavam biti negativna, već realna. Ako to postoji.

Entuzijazam i ljubav koji sam u životu nosila za sve što sad radila mi je donio razočaranje i nezadovoljstvo. Ozbiljno ti govorim. S tolikom ljubavlju sam stvari radila, unatoč tome što su bile nezadovoljavajuće i neadekvatne mojim vještinama i znanju, očekivala sam da će mi to donijeti rast i da će mi donijeti sreću. Očekivala sam da će donijeti rezultate. Rezultate kakve sam ja očekivala da donese. Međutim, rezultati su se očitovali na kraju svega kao veliko razočaranje. Htjela sam spasiti svijet i biti dio promjene. Nisam spasila svijet i nisam dio nikakve promjene.

Da pojasnim. Radiš na projektu, i trudiš se baš. Radiš s ljubavlju i entuzijazmom, očekujući svijet i božansko da te podrži. I podrži te. Ali ne na onaj način na koji bi tvoj « plemeniti rad trebao biti nagrađen i podržan». Onda postaješ tužan – zašto sav ovaj “dobri rad” ne uspijeva? Onda razočaranje. Da nisam toliko očekivala, bila bih sretna s onim što sam dobila. Kako sam očekivala VELIKE stvari, i dobila mrvice – osjećala sam se nevažnom i usamljenom. Zato, koga više briga za rezultate, moram samo živjeti život sada, bez projekcija koje rijetko prikažu ono što sam ja mislila da bi trebalo.

RED, RAD, REZULTAT

Ali tu sam! Ovdje su mi sada stvari, ne sve, ali većina da – i to znači da sam tu.

Preuzela sam stan u Zagrebu od prijatelja, radim na tome da ga uredim što jeftinije i bolje mogu. Zahtjevan projekt, ali ništa nemoguće za Super-Ženu Gogu-Yogu. Što bi stvari u životu bile lagane? Živa dosada. Stvari sam rasporedila, slojeve oribala, ali stan još nisam pofarbala, pa tko želi, neka dođe i radi sa mnom. Otvoren poziv!

I kontam ja, kao i obično. Kontam jel to sve dobro, jesam li ja dobro, je li svijet dobro. Svijet nekako ipak na zadnjem mjestu trenutno. Mislim se, brinula sam se za svijet dovoljno dugo. Kugla zemaljska se još nije prestala vrtit', ljudi nisu prestali jest' i rađat djecu. Sve je pod kontrolom. Mojom ne.

Komentiram s kolegicom kako se sve promijenilo. Promijenilo se iz ljubavi i dobre volje u pare, brending i marketing. I sad je to tako. Nekoć je bilo više vremena, i manje tehnologije. Sad je više tehnologije i manje vremena. Ljudi se pretvaraju u mašine. Mehanički idu ovdje i ondje, obavljaju gomile zadataka, brinu se za sebe, za ljude oko sebe. Zum zum zum. Nije lako bubamarcima. Što više zadataka i obaveza, to više briga i izgaranja. Već smo u toj fazi da moramo tražiti vrijeme da bi našli mir.

Jel' nalaziš vrijeme? Jel' nalaziš mir? Gdje se žuriš? Čega se bojiš?

STRAH

Što bi ti napravio/la, da te nije strah?

Vidjela sam ovaj natpis na društvenim medijima.

I pomislila: što je to što bih ja napravila?

Putovala bih svijetom svirajući gitaru i pjevajući mantre.

Ljudi mi ne bi kritizirali rad na ne tako lijep način.

Provodila bih više vremena na plaži, pila kokosovu vodicu i meditirala.

Skočila bih iz aviona, iako se užasavam visina.

Otišla bih u Indiji, bez drugog plana, osim da jedem južno-indijsko jelo 'idli'.

Kada se ne bih bojala, iskreno bih rekla ljudima kako znaju biti grozni. I kada se ne bih bojala, ne bih bila povrijeđena kad bi ljudi bili iskreni prema meni o tome kako ja znam biti grozna.

Tražila bih novce da otplatim dugove.

Napravila bih crowd-funding kampanju za nešto sebično.

Vjerojatno bih bila u vezi.

Bila bih netko drugi da me nije strah.

Bila bih slobodna od poroka.

I to je razlog zašto ću se držati svojih strahova i buljiti u njih kako bi nestali. Možda ih prethodno srčano zagrlim, i zahvalim im se što su bili uz mene.

Beach Bistrica/Plaža Bistrica

POTSJETNIK SEBI

Svi tvoji negativni osjećaji su samo energija koja je zapela na mjestima gdje ne bi trebala zapeti. Kako bih ih izbacila iz sebe – meditiram. Svaka druga mentalna vježba koju sam se trudila napraviti je bezuspješna. Vraća me nazad odakle sam počela – u zabrinutost. Zabrinutost je negativna emocija koja se otklanja jedino prihvaćanjem i otpuštanjem – na energetskom nivou. Mentalni nivo, um, je majmunić koji sam skakuće uokolo. Ništa taj ne obavlja, ne donosi olakšanje. Donosi negiranje i još briga.

MEDITIRAJ!

Ili radi što god ti stavlja kočnicu na beskorisnu mentalnu aktivnost. Druge stvari za koje je um zaslužan, mogu biti korisne, ali ako um preuzme… Napravila bih još jedan „Što bi ti napravio/la, da te nije strah?“ popis.

Refurbished bike/Sređena bicikla, Zagreb