#jellyfish yars

[thegeminisage]

ok we watched the tng pilot. let's get into it

data is my best friend on this show and i love him

i liked riker but jonathan frakes looks like a baby without facial hair. he's gotta grow that in. also, at one point he asked someone a question and i got really excited. he should ask more people more questions i think thats what jonathan frakes was born to do. that and sit in chairs with style

also liked geordi even though we only saw him for 3 seconds and worf even though same.

the sections with q draaaaaaagged. ik people like q and whatever he has going on with picard but i'm just not there yet. this "humans are NOT savages anymore" plotline has been played out in tos many times to better effect

actually shocked picard was such a dick. idk why i was expecting him to be more kind maybe i was projecting professor x onto him?? but he kinda sucked lol like what was EVEN going on w his little pissing contest with riker

love and light, there should not be children on a starship. space is fucking dangerous. they're literally boldly going where no one has gone before. these kids could get hurt

the ship??? splits?????????? IS THAT LEGAL????

ok, furthermore, sorry, speaking of kids, not to be a misogynist but out of the 3 ladies (troi, crusher, and yar) i dislike 2 of them. love and light to deanna troi but i really hope she gets something to do besides emote and go OH THE PAIN...her look was slay. i understand completely how she turned women gay. give her something to do. give her a chance. i know she could be good.

i didn't mind dr crusher until she let her kid on the bridge even though you're not supposed to do that and they told him to touch nothing and he proceeded to touch everything and then she got mad when picard got mad. picard spent 70% of this episode being a dick and the one time he was justified she was like :/ wow you're such a dick. lmao. girl come on he literally said don't touch anything he was already being nicer than he had to be. the child was in the wrong children shouldn't even be on this ship

also they talk about wesley like he's their affair baby. idw if its true but nobody tell me. let me believe it. wesley crusher destined to suffer through male pattern baldness

also, i can see now why you're not supposed to date your ship mates. dating them is fine but being exes with them is excruciating and we had TWO PAIRS this pilot

anyway. tasha yar was rad i DID love her.

it's weird though how many of them use first names...in tos sometimes they didn't even use last names, only titles. spock called bones "doctor" almost exclusively. so riker calling geordi geordi after like 5 minutes of knowing him was a little weird

i cried when bones showed up. sue me. his prosthetics were terrible and i already miss him so much.

SPACE JELLYFISH. that part was good

overall both the adventure and the interpersonal stuff was a little ????? which is like. you can flop on one or the other. i DO have faith it will get better but i feel kind of lukewarm on it so far

there's a lot of direct counterpoints to tos, but it's shuffled JUUUST enough so it feels like it isn't copying tos's homework word for word but rewording it to trick the teacher. for example, data is like spock in that he doesn't understand emotions or whatever, but it's actually the inverse because spock understands and pretends not to, while data truly doesn't understand but wants to. then you have deanna troi who's sort of filling in for the other thing spock used to do, which is give us general impressions about unknown alien life, but she SPECIFICALLY does it through emotions so she doesn't resemble spock too much. the captain and first officer have a lot of scenes together but they're tense so it doesn't look too tempting to the slash fans. the doctor is still a bit grumpy but she's a woman this time. they don't use tricorders but geordi's special prosthetic helps them see all that shit anyway. it's tos but shuffled. lmao that it took 2 people to replace spock <3

anyway my favorite part, aside from the part bones was in, was when riker and data talked in the holodeck. and riker was like actually yeah the fact that you're a machine DOES make me uncomfortable. and data is like well i am superior but i'd like to be human actually! and you could see the little gears in riker's head turning and later he called data friend. i liked that and i love data. i love data he's very important even though the pilot wasn't good i think i would keep watching no matter what for data. and i knew it would be like that.

[andietries]

Comment on Star trek Tng Farpoint:

-First episode and captain Picard is already in the position of having to prove humanity as not a savage race, easy peasy. I would say that he is going to loss hair due to the stress but yeah

-Q is constantly checking out Picard. I don’t have words. Pretty sure Q stole his shirt in the end

-Geordi and Data haven’t interacted yet :( I feel betrayed

-You know what the vid they showed Riker needs? The Careless whisperer song

-Tasha Yar is great! I hope nothing wrong happens to her ever

-Thank Q the gigantic space jellyfish weren’t revengeful (I want what they have btw)

-“I’m leaving because I want to, not because you told me to” Lmao????

-Q: :D I’ll be back

Picard: please don’t

[jellyfishspew]

make it quick, he hasn’t had his coffee yet

(please do not repost artwork or remove caption)

[ezrisdax-archive]

Troisha for the ship opinions? Love your blog by the way! 💜

thank you!

Send me a ship and I'll give you my (brutally) honest opinion on it

so this is one of my all time fave trek pairs in general ever. back in 2015 when I was rewatching tng I really became invested in it because I noticed how much they would reach out for each other when the other was hurting. even in the first episode when troi is overwhelmed by the emotions of the jellyfish aliens you can see tasha is the first one to run over to her and hold her. and then you have the line later from troi of "lieutenant yar is very attractive" like come the fuck on, they were def attracted to each other.

I also yes am attached to the tragedy of it, like they had so much room to grow and know each other but it was cut short and we'll never see what they could have gotten up to in the later seasons :(((

god I still wish we had gotten later seasons with tasha, like I want to know how tasha would have reacted in the episode troi lost her powers! I want to know how troi would have been there in the episode tasha's sister returns! I want to know!!!!!

buuuut for what I did get I absolutely love them, they're so tactile and there for each other and I'm weak...

[spoofymcgee]

mkay so the streaming platform i use only has journey to babel with the sound effects, but none of the dialogue, god knows why, so i went and watched encounter at farpoint instead and i have Thoughts.

first and foremost that q is so fucking annoying. 9/10 less obnoxious than my sis but that's not a high bar.

secondly, i love data with my heart and soul, he is delightful. 'what is... snooping?' and he just wants to learn to whistle!

third of all, tasha yar is my new favorite character. i can't tell if i want to date her or if i want to be her, but either way she is giving off the most intense queer vibes, and i am SO here for it.

and last,

space jellyfish kiss! the height of romance.

[starcloaked]

okay first five star trek (of the next generation variety) episodes rating bc. well i don’t know i don’t have anything better to do <3

encounter at farpoint: this is a rlly good pilot omg. good into to the characters and the adventure is cool and interesting i think all th episodes should be long like this actually! slightly confusing for a new viewer but v good i liked the silly little jellyfish <3 also troi is great i love her very much along with the rest of them this is such a good set up for every character they’re all so unique and fun

the Q ... oh my god the Q they’re such an interesting villain i know they come back in later episodes and are very excited for it they’re just fun!! unresolved tension but in a good way i like to be kept wondering

the naked now: *insert luigi staring with an indescribable negative emotion at his phone*

okay being serious i had to skip around this one cause this stuff typically makes me a bit uncomfortable but i kept watching only for wesley. oh my god i love wesley he’s hilarious and very smart i want him to be my partner in math class i think we would be friends :] kind of funny maybe but not for me i guess

code of honor: come onnn you guys yar doesn’t deserve that!! i mean the guy got screwed over in the end and thats great but #&@&@&#&# YOU GUYSS. didn’t like the premise very much but um when data said that the french language was little known...god i want that to be the future

i can at least agree that yar is hot eh episode 5/10

the last outpost: YEAAH aliens!! started out a bit rocky cause the going back n forth on the spaceship thing always gets a bit boring to me but by the end with the planet i was fully enthralled this is great. i want to live on the funny crystal planet!! also haha finger trap funny android man doesn’t know how to solve it hehe hoohoo (i like data though. i get the feeling he is probably everyone’s favorite and i can see why)

liked that worf was more involved in this one i like to see him. also geordi <3 i like him almost as much as troi he’s a blast in like every episode

umm ferengi were alright. wish they looked like mushrooms like their spaceship did and i dunno about making all of the alien races well. you know but i’m sure it gets much better

okay thats it next episode has more wesley in it very excited but i need to do math homework and then sleep good day :running emoji:

[atamascolily]

watching Star Trek TNG 1x01 - "Encounter at Farpoint" be like

oh, wow, these special effects were cutting edge once now I see what Galaxy Quest was a parody of Data just looks like he's relaxing in that chair instead of actually piloting the ship Okay, not sure why Picard has a telepath on staff--didn't think this was Babylon 5--but okay, sure, cool.

*Q appears out of nowhere*

gay very gay do the writers want me to think he's gay? why else would an alien entity dress as a 16th-century ship captain? Is he... flirting with Picard? Yup, definitely flirting. I ship it.

*Q keeps changing costumes* *Q plays cat and mouse games with Picard* You're not really doing anything to change my mind here, writers.

*Data trying to get out of the trial* *Data using his recording function to get Q to eat his own words* YOU'RE DOING AMAZING SWEETIE.

*Tasha Yar tries to jump a crowd to get at Q* we stan a legend

we also stan that 137-year old admiral who hates being beamed up and calls Vulcans "annoying". #LIFE GOALS.

so far, all the crew seems okay... ...oops, never mind, I hate Riker. Riker, please stop being a creep, Dr. Crusher is not into you.

hahaha, Picard and Riker have a conversation that is basically just lampshading Kirk for running off to have adventures instead of staying aboard ship like captains are supposed to, lol.

I'm with Picard on this one: why is there a literal CHILD on board?

oh, hahahaha, the telepath is Riker's ex and she's talking in his mind SUPER AWKWARD lol.

GEORDI LAFORGE!!!! <3<3<3<3!!

Data, you are amazing, please don't let Riker's stupid prejudices and nicknames for you get you down. I just want to punch Riker in the face ALL THE TIME. Is there a reason Deana Troi is wearing a miniskirt when Tasha is wearing pants? Is there no standard uniform for women, or is Deana not part of the ship's hierarchy? She's got a Starfleet emblem, but her title is "Counselor"

that asshole Riker tells Troi to open her mind when she's uncomfortable doing so and she does it and then falls to her knees sobbing with pain I HATE THIS ASSHOLE (this is even worse when I remember THEY USED TO DATE AAAAAHHHHH). And then he has to rush to the rescue *sigh*

oh no Dr. Crusher and Picard Had A Thing, too, didn't they??? I SEE THAT SIGNIFICANT HEADNOD OF MUTUAL UNDERSTANDING ABOUT THE PAST.

LOOK AT PICARD SOFTENING AT WESLEY LIKE EVERYONE ELSE ON THIS SHIP. D'aww.  

RIKER PULLS RANK ON TROI WHEN SHE CAUTIONS HIM, FUCK I HATE THIS DUDE. (Her title is “Lieutenant” here... Lieutenant Counselor?) the old city looks like Tatooine, lol

Tasha's bench looks so ergonomically uncomfortable if she's going to be using it while standing WHYYY love how Data moves in a way that doesn't look quite human The fact that Q approves of Riker just makes me hate him more. Q calling Picard "mon capitaine", I just... FLIRTING. HE'S FLIRTING. Picard is such an awkward turtle with Dr. Crusher LMAO. is it... yes, it is... A SPACE JELLYFISH? HECK YEAH. Q is such a sore loser and such a DRAMATIC ASSHOLE. and so clearly flirting with Picard

I love everything except for Riker. Maybe he gets better?

[phantom-le6]

Episode Reviews - Star Trek: The Next Generation Season 1 (1 of 6)

Well, it’s taken a little while longer than I’d originally planned, but at last I’ve started working my way through the episodes of my Blu-ray collection of Star Trek: The Next Generation, the first of a number of series I will be hoping to tackle in my TV show backlog.  For those who haven’t ready any of my TV show reviews from when I used to post them on Facebook notes, the lay out is very similar to what I do for film reviews.  I usually do one disc’s worth of episode per article (every show I review is one I own on DVD or Blu-ray), and within that, I post a synopsis of the episode’s plot, followed by my review of that episode.  So, if you’ve never watched a certain series and want to skip the plots, or you know the episode from its title alone, just skip the sections headed as ‘plot’ and go straight to the review.

So, now that you know how this is all going to go, let’s warp our way into those first few episodes of TNG’s first season. Reviews, engage…

Episodes 1 & 2: Encounter at Farpoint

Plot (as adapted from Wikipedia):

In 2364, the new flagship of the United Federation of Planets, Starfleet's USS Enterprise, travels to the planet Deneb IV for its maiden voyage. Enterprise is to open relations with the simple Bandi people who have somehow been able to tap immense energy reserves and construct Farpoint Station, much to the surprise of the Federation. En route, the Enterprise is met by an omnipotent being who identifies himself as Q, a member of the Q Continuum. Q, appearing a grand inquisitor from Earth’s post-nuclear age, declares that humanity is being put on trial. A suggestion from Captain Picard results in Q deciding that their actions in their upcoming mission will be used to judge their worthiness and determine their fate as a race. Before letting the ship resume its course, Q warns Captain Picard that he is destined to fail. 

As the Enterprise arrives, the crew members explore the offerings of Farpoint Station and establish relations with their Bandi host, Groppler Zorn. The crew becomes suspicious when items they desire seem to appear out of nowhere moments later, and are unable to identify the power source that feeds the station. Deanna Troi, an empath, senses a being with powerful yet despairing emotions nearby, and the crew discover a strange labyrinth beneath the station, but Zorn does not offer an explanation. As the Enterprise crew continues its explorations, a large unknown alien craft enters orbit and begins to fire upon the old Bandi settlement near Farpoint Station, and abducts Zorn. Before Picard orders the ship's phasers to be fired at the craft, Q appears to remind him of humanity's trial and prompts Picard to send an away team to the alien craft. The away team discovers the craft has passages similar to those under Farpoint and they are able to free Zorn. Their actions cause the alien craft to transform into a jellyfish-like space creature, and Picard is able to deduce the mystery of Farpoint Station. He confirms with the apologetic Zorn that the Bandi found a similar lifeform injured on their planet and, while attempting to care for it, they also exploited its ability to synthesize matter to create Farpoint Station. The creature now in orbit is trying to help free its mate by attacking those who hold it captive. 

Though Q goads Picard into using violence, Picard refuses, instead ordering the Enterprise to fire a vivifying energy beam onto Farpoint after the station is evacuated. The beam allows the land-bound creature to transform back into its jellyfish-like form, and it flies into orbit to join its fellow being. As the crew watches the reunion of the alien creatures, Q reluctantly tells Picard that they have succeeded in their test, but hints that they will meet again.

Review:

As someone born a couple of years before this show first aired, I missed this pilot and much of the earlier seasons in their original appearance, only getting to see anything of the show in the early-to-mid-1990’s when my family first got Sky TV and I watched some of the later episodes and re-runs of some earlier episodes on Sky 1.  Thank goodness for those being my introduction to the show, because as pilot episodes go, this one isn’t great.  Granted, very few pilots are ever completely brilliant because the show is starting out anew and will take a while to establish what it is, and there’s no guarantee how long that will take.  For some shows, it could be a matter of only a few episodes, such as The West Wing or Friends, whereas others might be more like the Simpsons and M*A*S*H, taking more than just their first season to really find themselves.

 The biggest problem this pilot has is a lack of exposition to explain what the show is really about.  Ok, we’re on a starship crewed mainly by humans, travelling the galaxy to explore what’s out there, but that’s all you get.  That might be sufficient for people who were versed in the franchise of Star Trek from the three-season long original series and the various films it spawned, but what about new audience members?  Other shows have made similar assumptions that everyone will know what their show is about based on existing media, and for me it always spoils the pilot.  In my view, the only good pilot assumes at least its audience will know nothing about what the show will be about and will tailor at least half its content to educating them in that era, with the rest of the content being about placating the existing fanbase if the show is continuing a franchise or adapting it from another medium.

The episode is also plagued by some poor character interactions, especially Picard’s over-the-top anger at Wesley for no good reason, Troi’s over-the-top whining when she’s in empath-mode, and the less said about Tasha Yar’s histrionics in front of Q during the fake trial set-up the better.  Really, it’s down to the performances of Riker, Data, Wesley’s mother Dr Beverly Crusher, Geordi and Worf to elevate the episode to decent, and for Q to be the better guest character than Zorn.  This episode is also where Colm Meaney makes his debut as Miles O’Brien, who would spend several seasons as a secondary recurring character in TNG before making the switch to spin-off series Deep Space Nine (which I reviewed some years ago on Facebook) as a series regular.

There’s not much depth or real issue exploration in this episode, we don’t really learn what Star Fleet is or what it represents (the words Yar uses during her court-room meltdown before being thankfully frozen), and really all we do get is some basic character introduction and a Trek show that starts off more on impulse, or at least low warp.  Overall score for this combined episode is about 6 out of 10, and I’m probably being a bit charitable at that.

Episode 3: The Naked Now

Plot (as adapted from Wikipedia):

The crew of the Enterprise travels to rendezvous with the SS Tsiolkovsky, a science vessel monitoring the collapse of a supergiant star. During a long-range comm exchange, the Enterprise crew are shocked to hear what sounds like a sudden hull breach about the Tsiolkovsky. After the Enterprise secures the Tsiolkovsky via tractor beam, an away team consisting of Commander Riker, Lt. Yar, Lt. Commander Data and Lt. La Forge beams over.  They find the crew frozen to death in various stages of dress and undress, including one who was taking a shower fully clad, and whose frozen body falls into La Forge's hands.

Captain Picard orders Dr Crusher to perform full medical examinations of the away team on their return, and the doctor finds La Forge sweating profusely and complaining about the temperature. She orders him to stay in sickbay but he wanders out while she is studying his test results, and makes his way to the quarters of Crusher's son, Wesley. Unaware of La Forge's condition, Wesley shows him a portable tractor beam device and La Forge places an encouraging hand on his shoulder. Meanwhile, acting on a hunch by Riker, who had read a book on past starships named "Enterprise" that included an event involving illness and showering fully dressed, Data locates a historical record identifying the ailment as similar to one encountered by Captain Kirk's USS Enterprise. La Forge returns to sickbay, where D. Crusher quickly becomes concerned when she realizes that the infection is spread by physical contact. Much of the ship's crew comes under the influence of the ailment, including Data, who engages in a sexual encounter with Yar. Dr Crusher, struggling against the effects of the ailment, finds the original antidote documented by Kirk's Enterprise to be ineffective, and begins devising a new version of it.

Now infected, Wesley uses a digital sample of Captain Picard's voice to lure key engineering crew-members away from the engineering deck. He erects a force field around the area with his tractor beam device and assumes control of the ship. He allows Mr Shimoda, one of the engineers who is acting in a childlike manner, into the force field. Shimoda manages to remove all of the isolinear chips from the engine control station and plays with them like toys. As the supergiant star collapses, a fragment is blown into a direct impact course with the two Federation ships, and without the chips in place, they cannot move out of its way. Chief Engineer MacDougal manages to disable Wesley's force field, and Data is sent to replace the chips. He reports that he will not have enough time. Wesley reverses the ship's tractor beam, repelling the Enterprise off the Tsiolkovsky, giving themselves the necessary additional seconds for Data to replace the chips enabling the ship to move out of the way. The crew is cured of the ailment, and Picard partially credits Wesley for helping to prevent a disaster.

Review:

Not only is this Trek at its worst, but it’s actually based on an original series episode with pretty much the exact same core plot; some random configuration of water molecules making an Enterprise crew act like the Trek equivalent of chavvy idiots getting plastered on a night out. It’s an appallingly bad concept, especially when Picard’s closing dialogue suggests the whole thing was meant to be about some kind of exploration of temptation.  News flash, folks, but the episode is an abysmal failure in the exploration of that issue.  To be successful, you’d have to give the crew the option about whether or not to give in to temptation sober.  The crew of the Enterprise doesn’t have a choice here because it’s some weird combination of water molecules acting like an infection that causes drunken-like behaviour.  As such, their judgement is impaired against their will, so the point is lost.

The episode is also stupidly sexist in how the infection presents; while more of the men just have a harder time thinking, get morose or go child-like and silly, all three female main cast members throw themselves on the blokes like randy strippers.  Tasha Yar sleeps her way through various minor male crew members before seducing Data, Troi seeks out Riker to try for a mind-grope, and Dr Crusher tries it on with Picard.  How Roddenbury (who was still alive and producing Trek at this point) allowed such antiquated sexist tripe into the supposedly equality-minded Trek utopia, I have no idea.  Given that the show improved in this and related areas when he stepped away from the show, however, I’m wondering if maybe he was somehow part of the problem.

All in all, this episode is something you only watch so you can get what few references there may be to it in later episodes of the series as a whole.  I give it a very low 2 out of 10.

Episode 4: Code of Honor

Plot (as adapted from Wikipedia):

The Enterprise arrives at the planet Ligon II to acquire a vaccine needed to combat an outbreak of Anchilles fever on Styris IV. The crew, possessing little information on the Ligonian culture, finds it follows strict customs of status similar to ancient China. Specifically, while the men in their culture rule society, the land itself is controlled by the women. Lutan, the Ligonian leader, transports up to the Enterprise to provide a sample of the vaccine, and is impressed by Lt. Tasha Yar's status as head of security. Yar further demonstrates her aikido skills against a holographic opponent for Lutan on the holodeck. After a tour of the ship, Lutan and the Ligonians abduct Yar as they transport back to the surface. Captain Jean-Luc Picard demands that Lutan return Yar, considering the kidnapping an act of war, but receives no response from the planet. After consultation with his officers, Picard is informed that Lutan took Yar in a "counting coup" as a show of heroism. Picard contacts Lutan in a more peaceful manner, who grants permission for the Enterprise crew to beam down to the planet and promises to return Yar after a banquet in his honor.

Lutan announces at the banquet that he wishes to make Yar his "First one", surprising not only the Enterprise crew but also Yareena who was already Lutan's "First one." Yareena challenges Yar to a fight to the death to claim back the position. When Picard objects to the fight, Lutan refuses to give the Enterprise the rest of the vaccine unless Yar participates. The crew investigates the combat ritual and find that the weapons used are coated with a lethal poison, and also that it is Yareena's wealth to which Lutan owes his position. Picard prepares to have Yar beamed to the Enterprise should she be harmed in the battle. As the match progresses, both Yareena and Yar are equally skilled, but Yar eventually lands a strike on Yareena. Yar quickly covers Yareena and orders the transport of both of them to the Enterprise against the demands of Lutan. Aboard the ship, Dr. Beverly Crusher reaches Yareena moments after death, but is able to counteract the poison and revive the woman's body. When Lutan demands to know the fate of Yareena, Crusher reveals that Yareena died, thus ceding the match to Yar and breaking the "first one" bond. Yareena is now free to select a new mate; she chooses Hagon, one of Lutan's bodyguards, and effectively strips Lutan of his position of power and makes him her "Second One". Hagon lets Yar go and gives the Enterprise their full supply of vaccine.

Review:

This episode wasn’t very well received by the cast and crew that had to make it, and I can certainly see why.  The Ligonian race is based on African tribal stereotypes that become obvious as a result of the race being played by Black actors, giving the episode an air of racism that is completely inappropriate to the Trek franchise as a whole.  According to Wikipedia, some reviewers have claimed that this issue would not have been seen if the actors had all be white and used the same dialogue.  Frankly if the Ligonians had been played by white actors, you’d have had a very early example of cultural appropriation, which is also a form of racism and again inappropriate to Trek.

The episode is also plagued by efforts to try and emulate the original series instead of being its own entity, with the final fight scene near the end really looking too much like a 1960’s throwback rather than fitting into any kind of 1980’s-made Trek.  Only the hints of the budding Data-La Forge friendship really make the episode worth a watch, especially since Picard stops himself in the middle of an explanation about the Prime Directive.  With that in, we might have had delayed compensation for the lack of exposition in the pilot, but instead…nothing.

Frankly, without fan support and the show being syndicated rather than controlled by a network, I’m pretty sure this episode or the previous one would have killed TNG in its infancy.  I’m just lucky that I know the show would later make itself into something worth watching, so I’m ok holding out hope for better episodes as I work my way along.  I just the rest of season 1 doesn’t have too many more of these stinker episodes in store. For me, Code of Honour again only warrants 2 out of 10.

[hunterboldlygoes]

Star Trek: TNG Season 01 Episode 01

AND AWAY WE GO!!!!

__________

God this opening is just the best.

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Patrick Stewart is just so great.

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I like how Data is basically a Spock replacement.

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Maybe it's because of my fond memories of this show growing up....but I am stoked for Q being in the first episode...whereas in TOS, I would really not enjoy the magical being episodes.

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I am 15 minutes in and all Tasha Yar has done so far is YELL ALL HER LINES!!!

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Oh shit! I do not remember a saucer separation happening in the pilot!

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I do like that the "battle bridge" looks like the bridges that are in the movies.

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IS THAT SHANG TSUNG?!?

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I'm pretty sure Judge Q borrowed that outfit from Grace Jones.

__________

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Beardless Riker smiling at Wesley is the creepiest thing I've seen in a minute.

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Picard: "I don't feel comfortable with children."

Same, dude.

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HELL YEAH!!! OLD MAN BONES!!!

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That ensign definitely checked out Riker's ass as he walked off.

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Dude....Picard has got it BAD for Crusher!!

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So wait....is Picard Wesley's dad?

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There is way more romantic entanglement on this show....and one episode in....I'm here for it.

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Ohhhh. Fairpoint is a spaceship?

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Space Jellyfish!

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This one 90 minute episode was better than half the movies.

[sshbpodcast]

The Mixed Bag that Is Season One of TNG

by Ames

Season one of Star Trek: The Next Generation is an uphill battle, but it'll get better, right? Your heroes here at A Star to Steer Her By just wrapped the first season, and can't wait for Picard and crew to hit their stride, or at least change their uniforms.

Because TNG has so many episodes, instead of waiting for the end of the series, we decided to do an abridged season wrap, complete with top and bottom three episode lists. And not surprisingly, we barely agreed on anything, and someone brought a poisoned glavin to the recording session.

[images © CBS/Paramount]

Bottom Three Episodes

Let's start with our bottom threes so we can end on a positive note. Or an "I guess these were okay" note. Here's a bunch of rookie mistakes from season one.

“The Last Outpost”: Ames What TNG did to the Ferengi is a crime that it takes until we get Quark in DS9 to atone for. Turning a villainous race into the jokes they were just ruined this episode and the whole race for years to come.

“Too Short a Season”: Ames The makeup alone is enough to put this one on the shit list, but add to that some lousy acting and lots of shoddy episode padding, and you've got a show that looks worse than Jameson's face.

“Skin of Evil”: Caitlin Say what you will about Tasha Yar's demise, Armus is a stupid idea for a villain. With way too much talking to a printer ink–covered rubber costume about how evil it is, this episode ended up being mostly tedious.

“Conspiracy”: Jake In an attempt at continuity between episodes, Star Trek manages to completely bungle everything that "Coming of Age" set up and make everyone confused as to what the hell is going on and why everyone is exploding.

“Justice”: Jake Roddenberry clearly inserted way too much of himself (you know which part of himself) into this episode. Also we enthusiastically break the Prime Directive again. Also there's god. Also they kept Wesley alive.

“The Neutral Zone”: Caitlin and Chris What do you do when you have two half-episodes? Do you cram them sloppily together and hope one cancels out the faults of the other? Well, not if you know how to write good episodes, but we're not there yet.

“Angel One”: Ames and Chris It is a feat unto itself for an attempt at commentary on apartheid to somehow also end up getting feminism upsettingly wrong. We're still baffled as to what this episode was trying to accomplish, but we can tell it failed.

“Code of Honor”: Caitlin, Chris, and Jake The gold for stinkiest turd goes to "Code of Honor," with its really uncomfortable racist casting choices, showing its hand and spoiling the tension, and did I mention the really uncomfortable casting choices?

Top Three Episodes

And here are some highlights we'll probably never talk about again because future seasons are so much better. These prove that we're on our way there though.

“Encounter at Farpoint”: Ames Anything with Q gets extra points, and the series premiere had lots of him being absolutely delightful. An extra nod to the jellyfish, the most alien creatures on earth, in space, and everywhere in between.

“Datalore”: Caitlin Two Datas are better than one in this fascinating though sometimes confusing Data backstory episode. Basically, when in doubt, just add more Datas, as we're about to prove... 

“We'll Always Have Paris”: Ames If two Datas are better than one, then three Datas is just topnotch, right? Anything with some hard science that breaks time is plenty fun, and Picard's romance scene was sweet enough. Next time: infinite Datas.

“Haven”: Caitlin Majel Barrett's back as the fabulously over-the-top Mama Troi, lookin' fine. We've got an awkward love story and an awkward plague ship and some awkward scenes with Riker, and you know what, it sorta works!

“Coming of Age”: Chris We could watch Wesley failing in this episode for days for the schadenfreude alone. Kudos to a storyline that actually knew what to do with the little know-it-all for a change.

“Heart of Glory”: Chris We finally get some Klingon action and it's been worth the wait. Worf is on his way to being a three-dimensional character, and we are 100% here for this. RAWR!

“Where No One Has Gone Before”: Jake The Traveler manages to fix "Shore Leave" from TOS with a much better episode that smashes thought and reality together and gives us some great visuals on the edge of the universe. Sorry not sorry, Finnegan.

“11001001”: Ames and Jake Picard is starting to fill out his character, the Bynars are a fabulous concept for an alien species, and we've got some nifty science to go with it when we finally drag Riker and Picard away from macking on their holo-woman.

“Symbiosis”: Caitlin, Chris, and Jake Three of your hosts conspired to agree on this one (I'm sensing a pattern). Ignore the Nancy Reagan PSA for a minute, and you've got a lot of really great political commentary that sparked one of the more intelligent conversations we've had.

Did that get you in the mood for more final verdicts? There's a holodeck program for that. Check out the Top Five and Bottom Five TOS episodes, and the Worst and Less Worse Episodes of TAS.

We're bound to get some better TNG soon, though the beginning of season two isn't much to start with, so stay tuned, be sure to keep listening, follow A Star to Steer Her By on Facebook and Twitter, and get ready to crank out more and more Datas.

[jellyfishspew]

HELLO I WAS JUST ABLE TO FIND YOUR ART ONCE AGAIN WHICH MADE ME VERY HAPPY. I love your muppets/human muppets art especially ❤️

thank you so much!!💖💖💖

[jellyfishspew]

Leo: Dad. Goji: Yes son. Leo: I got into a relationship today. Goji: ... Several minutes later.. Goji: Is that where they live? Leo: *in the backseat* What are you doing?! Goji: *preparing his atomic breath* I just want to talk to them

sfbhhjfagfhj goji please

[jellyfishspew]

Came for the muppets. Stayed for the clone high and also still the muppets

👌😎

[jellyfishspew]

GOOD NEWS! Scooter and Skeeter will show up on the new Muppet Babies! May 22 2020!

that is good news!!!

the kids are coming back!!!!!

[jellyfishspew]

You and homefryboy are the only people Ive seen here that post modern Muppet content and it's more than I could ever ask for. It's good stuff honestly and we need more of it.

thank you so much!!!

[jellyfishspew]

Apologies, but it seems that your “personal blog” link is outdated. do you mind giving us a new link for your new blog since arsenic-colada ain’t workin’ too well?

Oh yeah I forgot to update it last night, sorry.

Here’s a new one: ♔