#jeff the doorman

[namelessspirit27]

I’m this scene Michael gives the doorman a real frog (his final gift to the doorman before he goes to earth for the final time) and it’s clear that Michael expected that the doorman was going to name the frog after him.

While the doorman didn’t do that I think that the name maybe is a nod to something else. Namely the first frog related gift Michael got him! The tumbler with a sticker of a frog on it. Which upon seeing the doorman remarked “he’s a jumper”

So the doorman maiming the frog Mr. Jumpy Legs was partially to tie the first and last gifts together.

Obviously this is me reading far too much into this but I don’t care cause I like it.

[clairedelune-13]

Appreciation post for Jeff the Doorman, my second favorite ND.

[crustacean-man]

The guy is a robot who was built by another robot who has no clue how to build a robot, therefore, wind chime penis

[colfy-wolfy]

this thingy so fun to draw silly little tail man crush his skull and watch the puddle of flesh and blood regenerate back to normal awww so shmumple heart emoj i aww c little mouf oguhb b

[harrywavycurly]

Worth the Fight: I’m Just a Librarian

Masterlist: Here

CW: Pregnancy symptoms, protective Harry, slight panicking, fans finding your job, cliffhanger-ish ending.

A/N: I got asked for some more protective Harry so I hope this hits the mark, also I know most fans wouldn’t do this (stalk Harry’s baby momma) but it’s for the plot and I’m very sorry for the ending but it’ll be fine, promise!✨

Tag List: @kookjipao @msolbesg @lomlolivia @namoreno @outofthisworl-d @mema10 @watarmelon212 @natykn @sassamanda77 @st-ev-ie @ghayda0 @hannah9921 @indierockgirrl @chaoticthoughts2022 @lizsogolden @gmikaelson @styleswithaseaview @sofaritsalrightt @babegoals @fangirl509east @one-sweet-gubler @stylesftcher @umadirectioner @last-saturday-night @montgomery-929496 @laughterismytherapy @hisparentsgallerryy @jerseygirlinca @behindmygreyeyes @mads3502 @tpwkdpr @unfuckwitablenarry @itscoucouharry @latedirectionerera @ell0ra-br3kk3r @cumuluscranium @donutsandpalmtrees @silastylesswift @prettygurl-2009 @blueleonor @daphnesutton @angeldavis777 @harryssunflower17

Summary: You and Harry post your pregnancy announcements and things get a little hectic✨

You do your best to busy yourself by packing your lunch for work, making sure to grab the containers of cut up fruits and veggies Harry made you the day prior during his juice visit. You roll your eyes at the sticky note on the front of your lunch box that says “don’t forget your water” in his handwriting that could be mistaken for a doctor’s with how barely legible it is. Harry has taken it upon himself to make sure you stay healthy during your pregnancy and that includes trying to get you to drink as much water in a day as possible, he even went as far as buying you several different types of water bottles to try to find one you actually enjoy using. That’s how you wound up with the bright pink and yellow metal bottle that has a handle on top as well as a straw that tucks away so it doesn’t get all gross when you’re not using is. It’s the only water bottle that keeps your water the perfect temperate for drinking because you’ve become quite picky when it comes to the temperate of drinks lately so Harry considers this a giant win for him and smiles every time he sees you drinking out of it.

You quickly grab the water bottle off the counter and shove it into your bag along with your lunch box and head for your front door. It’s not until you’re about to grab your doorknob do you remember something, you look behind you and smile when you see Paris sitting in the archway of your kitchen staring at you with his big green eyes. You give him a smile and blow him a kiss as you slip on your shoes.

“Bye Paris I love you. Have a good day.” You shout over your shoulder to the orange ball of fur before you open your front door.

You let out a sigh as you lock your door and head down the hallway towards the elevators pulling out your phone and unlocking it to check the time and you just so happen to see the brightly colored social media app staring at you making your mind suddenly going back to the exact thing you had been trying to distract yourself from. You chew on your bottom lip as you step into the elevator, it’s only been half an hour since you posted your photo and you know it’ll be a shock to everyone who follows you and while you want to see the reactions and comments you just can’t quite bring yourself to check, at least not yet.

You slide your phone back into your bag as you step out of the elevator and turn to head towards the front entrance of your apartment complex, smiling at the doorman as he holds the door open for you. You look around for the very familiar black SUV, the one Harry has been insisting you use ever since your meeting with Jeff a few days ago because it gives him a small peace of mind knowing you have someone he trusts making sure you get to and from work safely. Nick gives you a small wave to get your attention making you grin as you walk over to him, he is quick to open the door for you and help you into the back of the car.

“So tell me how is it going with the new series? Are you enjoying it?” You ask as you get comfortable in the backseat of the SUV, placing your bag down on the seat next to you. Your mind going back to the first time Nick drove you to work and how shocked he was to find out it was a library, and when he picked you up later that same day he was a little nervous but he eventually ended up asking you for some book recommendations for someone who likes crime shows and then the next day he asked for some books his daughter, Jasmine might like who was just starting to really get into reading.

“I gotta tell ya I didn’t think I’d be into reading about murder mysteries but I’m really liking this Alex Cross character. He’s cool.” Nick answers as he checks his surroundings before pulling away from the curb. You let out a chuckle as you fold your hand together and rest them on top of your growing bump that has begun to make things such as getting in and out of cars a little harder for you.

“I’m glad you’re liking it.”

“Oh and thank you for the recommendation for Jazzy she’s really enjoying that girl oh-what’s her name again?”

“Junie B. Jones.”

“Ah that’s right. She’s finished the first one and already asked to go check out some other ones.” You smile as he tells you how much his daughter is enjoying the classic series.

“Well you can bring her to the library anytime and I’ll make sure she gets whatever books she wants.” You tell him as you reach over for your bag. “You’ll just have to make sure she returns them on time.” You add with a pointed look at him that he catches in the rearview mirror making him laugh and shake his head.

“Yes ma’am.” You just give him a nod as you grab your phone so you can text Harry when you arrive at work, something he has now asked you to do just so he can sort of keep tabs on you since he is too much of an over thinker and doesn’t have the courage to ask you to share your location with him so he can just see where you’re at that way. But you don’t mind, you find it oddly comforting knowing he at least has a vague idea of where you’re at when you leave the apartment.

“Do you want me to walk you to your office?” Nick’s voice brings you out of your thoughts as you look out the window just to find you’re already pulled up to the front of the library you work at. “Mr. Styles said you might need some help with the stairs?” You roll your eyes at the mention of Harry as you quickly send him a text telling him you’ve made it to work.

“Mr. Styles says a lot of things that aren’t true.” You inform him with a huff making him have to hold back a laugh because even though he is now driving you around, Harry is still his boss. “I don’t need help getting to my office Nick but thank you for asking.” You tell him in a much more softer tone than the one you just used.

“No problem ma’am.” He says before getting out of the car and walking around the front so he can open your door and help you get out. He grabs your bag from you and holds his hand out for you to hold as you step down onto the sidewalk. “I’ll be here at four. Let me know if that time changes okay?” You give him a nod as you take your bag from him and sling it over your shoulder.

“Sounds good. Thanks Nick.” He smiles and stands there by the side of the car until he sees you fully enter the building and it’s not until you turn and give him a wave, the agreed upon signal that you’re okay, does he make his way back to the driver’s side so he can leave.

You’re not even half way done with the day when you stand up to take a little lap around your work space, finding yourself getting a little stiff from sitting at your desk for too long. You’re about to reach for your lunchbox to grab a little snack when the door at the top of the stairs opens revealing a very worried looking Vivian, one of the main librarians who is in her mid fifties and manages the kid’s programs upstairs on the second floor. You watch her rush down the steps and head straight for your desk and you can see her face scrunch together in confusion when she doesn’t see you sitting in your chair.

“Is everything okay Viv?” You ask from behind making her jump and place a hand over her heart as she turns around to look at you. “Sorry I didn’t mean-"

“Oh thank goodness you’re down here.” Her words are rushed as she takes a few steps towards you with her arms stretched out. “We have a bit of a problem.” She adds as she gently places her hands on your arms once she’s close enough.

“Uh what-what kind of problem?” Your mind begins to swirl with issues that could have come up while you were off yesterday but when you feel her give your arms a soft squeeze and you catch her eyes glance down to your bump that is taking up all the space between the two of you it begins to click what kind of problem she might be referring to.

“There are uhm well-cameras and some I guess fans of yours outside and it’s getting mildly concerning because we aren’t sure how much longer we can keep it under control.”

“Fans? Of mine? Viv I don’t-I don’t have fans I’m just a librarian.”

“Maybe they are fans of his?” Her eyes once again glance down to your bump making you feel like your heart is about to beat right out of your chest at the image of Harry’s fans and random people with cameras standing outside the library.

“Oh god.” Vivian lets go of your arms so you can rest a hand on your forehead while the other grabs a random paperback off the table next to you so you can fan yourself with it as all of a sudden you start feeling the beginnings of a hot flash. “How many would you say? Like a dozen or-”

“It was a dozen about an hour ago so now I’d say it’s maybe closer to fifty or sixty people.” You feel your eyes go wide as she tries to gently let you in on just how big of a commotion is going on outside, she looks around and when her eyes land on your phone she is quick to walk over and grab it. “Maybe you should call someone? See if they can come and get you before it gets to be too unruly out there?” You’re nodding your head as she takes the book from you and hands you the phone but you feel like you’re having an out of body experience as you look down at the screen and see it’s barley a little past eleven meaning your post announcing the twins has only been up for three hours and yet people have somehow already managed to find out where you work.

“I’ll call Ethan.” You unlock your phone with shaky hands and when you go to your favorites in your contacts you realize he isn’t the one you need to call in this situation. “I should call Harry right? He-he is who I should call?” Vivian might not know the full story on how you ended up pregnant but she at least knows the name of your baby daddy so when you see her nod and give you a reassuring smile you let out a deep breath and hit his contact that is listed third in your favorites right under Ethan and Anne. You take a few calming breaths because you know if you sound panicked then Harry will panic and that’s not what you need right now, once you feel as level headed as possible you hit the call now icon and bring the phone up to your ear.

Harry is standing in the middle of Nora’s nursery trying to figure out where to place the bookshelf he had made to look like a house that fits the theme of her nursery, the theme he went with being storybooks as in classic princess stories mixed with little hints of sage green and dusty pinks so it will be similar in vibes to the one in your apartment. He feels his phone vibrating in the back pocket of his jeans and doesn’t bother looking at who’s calling before he hits accept. He places a hand on his hip as he brings the phone up to his ear, absentmindedly wondering if the bookshelf should go near the window that faces the backyard or if it should be tucked into the little nook near her closet door.

“Harry?” Your voice through the phone makes Harry’s heart drop a bit because he can tell something is off, he’s not sure what but he knows there’s something wrong.

“Are you okay?” He asks as he turns around so he’s facing the door to Nora’s room. He hears you let out a puff of air and he can practically see you placing a hand on your hip and looking up at the ceiling of the so basement you work in, something he’s seen you do a dozen times during his random pop ins to see you at work once he figured out which library you worked at.

“Uh physically yes I’m-I’m fine.” Harry’s brows furrow as he takes a few steps towards the nursery door. ���But uhm well-don’t panic okay? Because that’s not going to help-”

“What’s wrong?” Harry is already down the hall heading for the stairs as the words leave his mouth, his tone making it clear that he isn’t in the mood to beat around the bush and he needs you to get it the point of your phone call already.

“There’s people outside my work and-and some of them have cameras and some just look like fans of yours.”

“How many?”

“Maybe like sixty or-”

“I’m on my way.” He tries to sound as calm as possible as he rushes down the steps and grabs his business phone off the counter in his kitchen so he can text Nick to come get him. “Don’t move until I get there okay? I’m going to come get you.”

“Harry you can’t come get me. They will swarm you.” Your voice is shaky as you take a seat at your desk. “I’ll just-”

“You’ll just stay where you’re at until I come get you.”

“Don’t be rude to me Harry Styles I’m just trying to be smart about this and don’t need you being-”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be rude.” He says with a sigh as he runs a hand through his hair while he waits for Nick to pull into the gate. “Please let me come get you. I’ll be with Nick if that makes you feel better? He’s used to this sort of thing.” His voice is much softer and has only a slight edge to it as he asks for your permission to come rescue you from your own workplace.

“So I’ll be safe with Nick?”

“Yes. You’ll be safe with him.”

“Okay.” In the moment Harry doesn’t let it bother him that you only agree to letting him come now that you know Nick will be accompanying him, deciding he can dwell on that later because right now his main focus is getting to you and making sure you’re okay.

“I’ll be there soon.” Is the last thing he says before the two of you hang up just as Nick pulls into his driveway, Harry is climbing into the backseat before Nick even has a chance to get out and open the door for him.

“People are standing outside her work so we need to go get her before it gets bad.” Nick nods as he pulls out of the driveway and onto the main road of Harry’s neighborhood.

“Don’t worry boss we’ll make sure she’s safe.” Nick says when he catches the way Harry is chewing on his bottom lip and his leg is anxiously bouncing up and down. “It’ll be okay.” Harry wants to believe him but until he can see you standing in front of him unharmed and hopefully only mildly annoyed at the situation, he can’t help but feel a pit of panic and anxiety form in his stomach.

Harry isn’t even phased by the amount of people calling his name and trying to get their hands on whatever part of him they can reach, he just keeps his head down and follows Nick into the building. It’s not until he is at the top of the stairs that lead to your work station that he finally lets out the breath he feels like he’s been holding since getting off the phone with you not even fifteen minutes ago. Your sitting at your desk eating what looks to be the fruit he cut up for your lunch while a woman with short gray hair fans you with a hard cover book of some sort, the two of you are wrapped up in a conversation so neither of you notice him as he makes his way down the stairs while Nick stays at the top near the door.

“Edward and Nora? How precious. You know how I feel about Nora she is-”

“Hot flash?” Harry asks making the woman fanning you jump slightly at the sudden sound of his voice while you just let out a sigh of what he thinks is relief.

“Yes but it’s so much worse than normal because I think it’s being mixed with a small panic attack.” You answer as Harry takes a few steps so he’s in front of your desk, the woman fanning you pauses her movements so she can give Harry an extremely unsubtle once over that makes him stand up a little straighter and clear his throat as she appraises him.

“You’re Harry I presume?” She asks and all Harry can do is nod as he feels very nervous as the woman slowly nods before a small smile forms on her face when she turns to look at you. “He’s cute.” She tells you in a semi hushed tone but still loud enough for Harry to hear, he watches your cheeks get pink as you roll your eyes.

“Harry this is Vivian she’s in charge of the children’s programs.” Harry gives her a smile as she looks over at him. “Vivian this is Harry Styles the father of my two lovely babies.” Vivian laughs as she holds her free hand out for Harry to shake.

“Nice to meet you.” Harry takes note of how strong her grip is as she gives his hand a shake while also giving him a very pointed look that tells him she’s very aware of who he is and he swears it’s even a little threatening but he just brushes it off and gives her a smile.

“You as well.” Vivian returns his smile as he drops his hand and turns her attention back to you. “Do you still need me or may I give the fanning duties to Harry over here?” She asks you with a raised brow, you let out a huff as you look from her over to Harry.

“I don’t know Viv you think he’s capable of fanning me with the literary classic The Very Hungry Caterpillar?”

“Oh I think he’s capable of a lot of things with those hands.” Harry feels the need to look away as Vivian shoots you a playful wink as she hands you the children’s book she was using to fan you with.

“They are nice aren’t they? It’s the rings.”

“I bet they are just as nice without them.”

“They are but-I don’t know they are just better with them on.”

“I will just take your word for it. But I do have to get going I have to prepare the reading room for a group of three year olds.”

“I guess I’ll let him take a shot at it then. You’re officially relieved of your duties. Thank you Vivian.” Harry knows his face is as red as a tomato as the woman walks by him so she can make her way up the stairs to the main level of the library. You watch her leave as you place the book on your desk with a little giggle.

Harry moves around your desk so he’s standing right in front of you and it’s not until he kneels down so he’s eye level with you and places his hands on your knees that you feel a sudden lump begin to form in your throat. You can feel his eyes roaming over your body as if he’s making sure you really are okay and nothing is bothering you minus what’s taking place outside. It’s as if your body needed to see him in order to really process what’s going on because when his eyes find yours, you start to feel a very familiar stinging sensation making you blink a few times to try to keep the tears from falling.

“I know it’s a lot.” Harry’s voice is soft as he rubs his thumbs over your knee in a soothing motion. “I’m sorry I should’ve been prepared for this to happen and told Nick to stay with you or-or gotten-”

“It’s not your fault Harry.” Your voice is shaky as you place a hand on top of one of his that is resting on your knee. “I just don’t know how they found me so-so fast? Do you think they know where I live? Oh god Paris he-he doesn’t handle people knocking on the door very well if he’s alone and-”

“Hey look at me.” Harry’s voice is gentle yet firm as he gives your knee a soft squeeze when he notices your eyes darting around not knowing what to focus on as you go into a panic induced rant. After a moment your eyes finally land on his and the smile he gives you is enough to help at least start the process of calming down. “Pairs is going to be okay. We prepared for that happening. You have security at your apartment remember? They have a list of people to let in so no one will be able to knock on your door unless it’s someone you approved.” His eyes don’t ever leave yours as his words slowly sink in and start to help your heart not feel like it’s beating a mile a minute inside your chest and makes your breathing slow down a bit.

“I have-have security.” Harry nods as he gives your knees another squeeze. “Paris is going to be fine.” You say with a sniffle making Harry’s heart want to break at the sight of you getting upset over something he knows he’s the cause of, even though you told him it’s not his fault he knows that you wouldn’t be in this situation if you had gotten pregnant by someone who’s job didn’t require their face to be plastered everywhere and for cameras and fans following them around be something that is sadly an everyday occurrence.

“The four of you are going to be fine.” Harry reassures you as his eyes only briefly leave yours so they can glance at your very noticeable baby bump. You just continue to nod at his words while he keeps his strong hands securely on your knees making you feel grounded and able to really begin to breathe a lot easier.

“You mean the five of us right?” You question once Harry’s eyes are back on yours. “Paris doesn’t bite you anymore so I think he wouldn’t mind if you joined our little gang.” A small chuckle falls from Harry’s lips as you give him a small smile.

“Is that what you call the four of you in that little apartment? You have the twins mixed up in a gang before they’re even earth side?”

“Excuse me Mr. Popular but my apartment is a perfectly respectable size it fits everything I need and that spare bedroom is huge. It fits two cribs and a bookshelf and dresser in it.”

“Oh forgive me. So you call the four of you in that perfectly respectable sized apartment a gang?”

“What else would you call us? One of us is deadly with their teeth and one of us is has the mental strength to not cry at those animals in need infomercials.”

“Oh well I mean with those kinds of talents I don’t know what you’d even need me for.”

“Don’t get me wrong Harry I don’t need you.” Your voice isn’t as playful as it was a moment ago as you stare into Harry’s eyes. “I want you to be in our gang. We need someone who’s big dumb green eyes could be used as a distraction and you’re good with your hands.”

“Okay Cranky.” Harry says with a laugh as he stands up and holds his hands out for you to take. “I’ll be in your little gang.” You smile at his answer as you place your hands in his so he can help pull you out of your office chair. “How did you like the fruit?” He asks making you turn your head to look at the half eaten container of fruit sitting on your desk next to your lunchbox.

“Honestly I don’t remember how any of it tasted I was stress eating.” You answer honestly making Harry laugh and shake his head as he lets go of your hands so you can begin to pack up your things.

“How much water-”

“I’ve had to refill my bottle two times today so far.” You answer before he can even finish his sentence as you hand him your bag after placing your lunchbox in it only leaving your water bottle left for you to carry.

“Thats good.” You’re not prepared for how close Harry is when you turn around so you stumble a bit before Harry’s hand quickly grabs ahold of your forearm to help keep you steady. “God you’re going to be the reason I get gray hair before I’m fifty.” He mumbles as his grip on your arms loosens just enough so he can help you walk around the desk towards the stairs, he runs a hand over his face as he slings your bag over his shoulder noting how heavy it is with all your work things and lunchbox full of snacks. But he decides not to bring it up as he follows you up the stairs, a hand at the ready just in case he needs to reach out to stop you from falling, again.

“Okay so here’s what’s going to happen.” You let out a huff as Harry stands in front of you and grabs your water bottle from your hands and shoves it into the bag that’s still slung over his shoulder. “You’re going to walk behind Nick and let him guide you to the car while I walk behind you to make sure you don’t stumble or anyone tries to get too close.” You look over Harry’s shoulder to Nick who just nods in agreement at Harry’s plan.

The plan sounds good to you but as soon as your eyes catch a glance out the window your heart drops and your eyes widen at how many people are outside waiting for a chance to see you and Harry together. Harry notices your change in demeanor as your breathing starts to pick back up and get more uneven while your hands instinctively go to your bump before you turn your attention back to Harry and before you can stop yourself your mouth is opening and a long winded rant begins to spew out.

“They aren’t going to like try-try to touch me right? I’m just a librarian Harry I don’t even know why they are here? Why do they care about-about me? I’m just a librarian. I’m literally just a librarian whose desk is in the basement because I catalog the books and keep track of what’s going out and what’s coming in. I’m-I’m just a librarian.”

“Sweetheart.” Harry doesn’t know how the pet name falls from his lips but he just goes with it as he grabs one of your hands and places it on his chest. “Take a deep breath with me okay? Ready? Deep breath in.” You do your best to copy Harry as he takes a deep breath and then lets it out slowly. “Good now let’s do another one.” The way he gives you a proud smile when you copy his breathing makes your cheeks get pink. “You’re doing so good. Just one more for me okay?” You feel better as you release your third deep breath slowly through your nose, your hand on Harry’s chest feels warm from the heat of his skin underneath it.

“Can you-you hold my hand? When we walk out there?” Harry doesn’t hesitate as he gives you a nod while Nick prepares to open one of the doors in the front of the library.

“I’ll be right here the whole time.” Harry explains as he stands next to you and interlocks his fingers with yours on the hand that was pressed against his chest. “You ready?” You look over at Nick who gives you a big smile and a thumbs up before looking back at Harry and just giving him a nod because you’re only as ready as you can ever be for something like this.

“Let’s go. Remember just follow me and don’t stop.” You feel yourself squeezing Harry’s hand as Nick opens the door and begins clearing a pathway to the parked SUV.

“You’re okay.” Harry’s voice is the only one you can focus on as you walk out the door and get bombarded with screams and random questions. “I’ve got you. I’m right here.” His grip on your hand tightens as his arm goes out to create some space between you and the people trying desperately to get even the smallest glimpse of you and your pregnancy bump.

When you make it into the backseat of the car you feel as if you could take a nap with all the emotions and stress your body just went through in a short amount of time. You still have a death grip on Harry’s hand as he slides into the seat next to you as you lean your head onto the headrest and close your eyes.

“I’m okay.” You mumble already knowing that was going to be Harry’s first question as soon as he drops your work bag at his feet.

“You won’t have to deal with that again-at least not at work. I’m going to take care of it.”

“Okay.” You say barley above a whisper and Harry feels his body go tense when your head rolls onto his shoulder, he relaxes slightly when he looks down and see your eyes are still closed and your hand is still gripping his. “I really like the way you smell.” Your voice is muffled a bit but he still hears every word resulting in him letting out a chuckle.

“Thanks. I just really like you.” The moment the sentence leaves his mouth he feels his heart drop to the pit of his stomach. “Uhm I mean I like how you-you smell too. Not that I just like you.” He tries to save himself but he knows it’s too late when he feels your head lift off of his shoulder.

“You really like me?” The way you’re blinking as if to check that you’re really awake or not makes Harry swallow down all the nerves he feels building up because he figures he might as well get this over with now.

“I think it’s more of a crush? Yeah-yeah I’d say I have a crush on you.”

“Oh.”

Here are the instagrams you and Harry posted:

[baronessblixen]

Asking For Miracles

Merry Christmas, @katebeckets! I'm your PoangPal Secret Santa, and as I am mostly a writer, you're getting a fic 😁 You said you were enraged that we didn't get to see Mulder and Scully reunite at the end of "Redux II" (same, btw). So I wrote a scene where Scully tells him that she's in remission. It's angsty - but of course, it has a happy end. I hope you like it!

(Here's the AO3 Link)

@poangsecretsanta @today-in-fic

“Mulder, I know it’s late, but I- I need to see you.”

The words Scully left on his answering machine still ring in his ears, even half an hour after he first heard them. By the time Mulder arrives at the hospital, his legs are like lead and feel as if he’s just finished a marathon. Every step he takes is pure agony; if only he could turn around and run. That, of course, is not an option. Not when Scully asked for him. 

Mulder enters the hospital lobby, the place as familiar as his own home by now. He nods at Jeff, the doorman, and he nods back at him. Maybe he recognizes Mulder, or he has compassion for every sad soul that passes by.

He stops in front of the elevator, his fingers fidgeting with the lapels of his jacket. An elderly woman standing next to him eyes him wearily when he presses the elevator button twice more. He’s grateful she’s not making conversation as they step inside. His thoughts are loud, screaming at him. They have been ever since Scully’s phone call - another one he missed. The sound of her suppressed tears is too familiar; it already haunts his nightmares.

It’s late. The hospital is deserted – save for the elderly woman, who’s clinging to her purse, staying with him on the elevator until they reach the oncology ward. They share a silent look, pain evident in their movements as they set out in opposite directions. 

A phone call late at night is never good news. Scully must have called him just after 9 p.m. He grabbed his jacket as soon as he heard it, not even caring if it – or he – smelled bad. Scully is all that matters. 

Yet, now that he’s here, he slows down. The closer he gets to her room, the smaller and heavier his steps become. As long as he’s out here, and as long as he hasn’t looked into her eyes, and heard what she has to say, he can pretend. He can pretend the disease isn’t taking her life, cutting it way too short.

He passes room after room, getting closer to the truth. For once, Mulder doesn’t want it. He wants the miracle, the fantasy. From somewhere he hears music. Or maybe that’s just his imagination. It’s an older song, melancholic. A woman singing about wishing she had a river she could skate away on. Mulder thinks it’s a Christmas song. Who plays Christmas music in the middle of the year? He considers telling Scully about it, hoping it will make her smile. 

It’s no surprise that he hates hospitals. He’s hated them long before Scully got sick, but not always. The first time he remembers being in one was when he was a toddler, just about three years old. On his first visit, he was apprehensive. He knew the concept of hospitals from books; big, white rooms with doctors looking like angels, sometimes healing, sometimes taking people to heaven. That’s how his grandmother Mulder had described it to him when he’d asked. 

The angels, his grandmother had explained, too, had taken good care of his mother and his sister. As a new big brother, he had to know these things. It was his time to be brave. Just like now, he thinks, as his shoes squeak against the linoleum. Back then, his much smaller feet had shuffled along, trying to keep up with his father, who was holding his hand in his large, steady grip. Before that day, Mulder can’t remember his father ever holding his hand.

The room Mulder remembers is filled with a sunny warmth, despite it being November. What are the chances of it having been a sunny day? But that’s how he remembers it. Just like he remembers the soft smile on his mother’s face and the way he had to stand on tiptoe to see Samantha and her squishy face. Seeing her cemented his fate; he was a big brother and he would look after her forever. Only that forever had been taken away from them. Much like last night when he lost her again. No matter what he does, he keeps losing.

The memory ends there. In the following years, hospital walls became tainted. There was blood and screaming. Samantha broke her collarbone and Mulder broke his arm. His grandmother died; the angels she’d believed in taking her away. The memories are strung together like a pearl necklace in his mind; one painful memory after another. An endless circle. Now, there is another memory to add.

He stops in front of Scully’s hospital room. All is quiet. The music has stopped. His heart, however, hasn’t. It’s thumping steadily, loudly. So loud in fact that he wonders if Scully can hear it through the closed door. He closes his eyes and knocks.

“Come in,” Scully’s muffled voice says and so, finally, he does. His eyes find hers the second he steps inside. Her face is puffy - puffier than he’s seen it in weeks. The hollowness for once hidden. How many tears has she cried without him here? She throws him a small, shaky smile. A laugh falls from her lips that sounds more like a hiccup.

“I came as quickly as I could,” Mulder says, flinching when he realizes that’s a lie. He may have driven to the hospital as fast as he could, but he took his time arriving. 

“I thought you should hear it first,” she says, sniffing. She grabs a tissue out of a half-empty box and blows her nose. “This is ridiculous,” she adds, avoiding his eyes. “I just- I called you first when I- and you… you were the first person I wanted to call when I found out.”

Blood rushes in his ears, his temples throb; this is the last moment before he knows. Once she says it - once the words are out there - they can’t be taken back. It will be real.

“They did more tests. I- the last PET scan showed no improvement and I-,” she trails off and Mulder’s knees buckle. No improvement. There’s no cure for this cancer, just like Scully said months ago when she asked him to come to the hospital for the first time. No cure, no improvement. There’s only one way this can end. He wants to cover his ears; it can’t be true if he doesn’t hear it, or see it. 

“I wasn’t ready to accept that,” she goes on, her voice steady. She glances at him as if waiting for him to say something. It’s not like him to remain quiet, but what is there to say? He wants to get on his knees and pray to a God he doesn’t believe in. “So I asked for more tests. When you’re dying, doctors will do whatever you ask of them.”

“I’ll make sure to remember that,” Mulder mumbles and Scully cracks a smile.

“We did another PET scan, among other things, and Mulder- I don’t know why is this so difficult to say.” Another hollow laugh from her and he can no longer keep his hurt in. It expels from his mouth as his lips begin to quiver. Scully’s eyes open wide.

“Oh, Mulder,” she says, reaching out her hand and he’s too weak to deny her, to deny himself. Her skin is as soft as ever, her touch as assuring as it’s always been. He’s crying openly now, weeping. The tears are blurring his vision, but he sees what’s important: her in the hospital bed, smiling up at him.

“You shouldn’t have to comfort me,” he says with a sob, trying to compose himself. He thinks of his father, of the way he watched him dismissively the night his grandmother died. When Mulder, at ten years old, had wiped his tears away with the sleeve of this sweater, he had asked his father why he wasn’t crying. Wasn’t he sad? His father hadn’t replied and only stared at him before he’d wandered off.

“I don’t know what I was thinking, Mulder,” she says, tugging at his hand. “Sit down.” When he doesn’t, she tugs more strongly. “Sit. Please.” He does, his hands folded in his lap as if waiting to start a prayer.

“It’s not what you’re thinking,” she says softly.

“You’re a mind reader now?”

“I don’t have to be. I should have started with the most important news,” she says, waiting. He knows she wants him to look at her. He braces himself before he lifts his eyes to hers. Hers are brimming with tears, just like his own.

“My cancer has gone into remission.”

Mulder stares at her, not understanding. These are the words he wants to hear. Remission. Cured. Yet, he can’t believe them.

“You believe everything but not this?” she teases, her voice shaky.

“You’re- and the cancer? It’s- it’s.” He doesn’t know what to say. How do you describe a miracle? It just is.

“Like I’ve been trying to say, I couldn’t accept that there was no improvement. My mother… my mother and I prayed together and then I knew I couldn’t give up. I asked for another PET scan and more blood tests. Mulder, I don’t know what… something changed. Whatever it is, whether it’s the chip or, or-”

“You’re in remission,” he repeats, his brain finally catching up. She nods.

“I’m in remission. The PET scan shows great improvement. The tumor is shrinking.”

“I can’t- it’s shrinking? You’ll be fine?” He reaches for her other hand, needing to feel her. Again, she nods, smiling.

“I’ll be fine,” she whispers. Mulder stares at her, watches her, and sees his whole future. Their future. Together. His lips quiver again, but this time from joy. Scully nods, understanding him without a single word spoken.

“Come here,” he says, desperate. He lets go of her hands and engulfs her in his arms. Their positions on the bed are awkward, but they make it work. His heart thumps against her chest, and he feels hers, too. He doesn’t care if it was the chip or a miracle. For once, he doesn’t care about uncovering a secret truth. He just wants to hold her in his arms and have her by his side for as long as she wants to be.

“Will you stay?” she asks into his neck. Her lips are warm and wet and her touch brings him back into the here and now.

“I’ll stay,” he says. He’ll stay as long as she will endure him in her hospital room.

“I need to call my family,” she whispers and he loosens his grip on her. Her face is as wet as his own feels and he wipes at her eyes with his thumb. Her blue eyes are almost translucent and he’s in fear of losing himself in them. Instead, he finds himself nodding along, reaching for the cell phone on her bedside table and handing it to her.

“Tell them right away,” Mulder says. “Say you have good news.” He smiles sheepishly. She doesn’t need to know about what he’s gone through in between her call and her breaking the news to him. Still, he’d like Mrs. Scully and Bill Jr. to know what they’re in for so they won’t have to worry anymore. There’s been too much heartbreak already. Scully nods at him, new tears falling from her eyes.

“It’s a Christmas miracle,” Mulder muses and Scully’s eyebrows knit together.

“It’s not Christmas,” she says with a chuckle and he takes her hand into his, entwining their fingers. She lets him. He marvels at their laced hands, remembering the song from earlier. He hopes the woman found a river to skate away on. He hopes she found her happiness somewhere along the way. Or maybe what she was looking for was right in front of her eyes the whole time. He knows what’s that like. 

Mulder lifts his head and grins at her, falling deeper in love with her, allowing himself the full force of his emotions for once. The skepticism in her expression lets him know that she’s about to call him crazy. Or she would if this weren’t the exact moment her mother picks up the phone.

“Mom?” she says, trying to keep the tears out of her voice. Mulder squeezes her fingers to remind her he’s here with her. “I have something to tell you-…,” Scully goes on and looks at Mulder. There are so many things unspoken between them, and so many possibilities now for their future. 

“It’s good news.”

[jonahmagnus]

The chain = promise, the twisted blade (their called a Kris), the PINS, how Lisa's pin is gold like the treasure AND THE PROMISE CHAIN, the smile which reminds me of Ed's mom in the flashback, the Mask which makes me think of Phantomime, the BITE on the FULL MOON, FORGE'S HEART!? Alex's pins (so cutes), the CROWN and the CLOCK in the vault, Lisa LOOKING AT HER PIN like she knows its in her, the weight at the end of the promise chain, the door to the vault is a normal ass door (doorman real?)

The corner of whatevers on Alex's shirt looks a little bit like a pink version of the mask but idk why it would be? Jeff and Lisa both have webs, Alex and Lisa both have pins. Im so hopeful for Shrike this chapter.

"Forced to seek a new host, the Witch and her web envelop Bayview Biddle School. The members of the Activity Club find themselves resisting a Student Council crackdown alongside unlikely allies..." <- This + the Zack sketch of Max with the anti student council badge is giving me HIGH hopes for Serge in thsi chapter. And wow I wonder who those "unlikey allies are" . Looks at the chapter title. But I can guess.

[apomaro-mellow]

Whatever Stevie Wants 11

Part 10

“-The castle has many defenses. But those unknown by the dragons may have a chance to cast a charm. I urge you to make off with the treasure first. The princess has her own wings.”

Eddie had watched the video over and over again. He’d even saved it, just in case the post got deleted. His leg bounced where he sat on the couch. His hands ached to hold his mate, to embrace his pup, to know that they were safe in his arms again.

Jeff was pacing back and forth, just as agitated. “He’s sending us a hidden message. ‘The castle has many defenses’.”

“These folks are rich, they’ve probably got cameras around the place”, Gareth said.

“‘Those unknown by the dragons’...”, Grant echoed from the video. “The dragons are probably his parents. What does he mean by being unknown and able to cast a charm?”

Eddie suddenly stood and snapped his fingers. “His parents only met me and Jeff. They probably won’t recognize you and Gare.”

Jeff stopped his pacing. “You guys might have a chance to sneak in and get the girls.”

“And then Steve can get away on his own”, Gareth said.

Eddie suddenly felt lighter. “That means we’ve got one chance. If they realize too soon what’s going on, they’re going to make it tighter than Fort Knox.” ----------------------

“I don’t even know if I should let you out of the house after that stunt with Findlay”, Margaret said. “Do you know what Betty Rockville said to me today? She asked if I preferred potato salad or macaroni salad. A Rockville! The shame of it all.”

“Isn’t she in the middle of planning a wedding?”, Steve asked, knowing that wasn’t the point.

“It was a slight at my offense and you know that. I’ve raised you to at least recognize that much. A Rockville, Steven! Our family has stood shoulder to shoulder with great families in this country. Kennedys and Reagans. And Betty Rockville thinks she can say that to me.”

Steve looked at his father imploringly. He didn’t regret what he did, but there was only so much of his mother that he could take like this. Layton took pity on him and cleared his throat.

“Why don’t you give Steve the good news, Margaret?”

Steve raised a brow. “Good news?”

His mother settled a little at that. “I’ve narrowed it down to three venues and you’ll never guess what’s available.”

“Available for what?”

“Your wedding, of course. You have to plan these things in advance, you know.”

“I know. I’m already married.” And it had been a beautiful ceremony. Steve had cried at least three times. 

Margaret waved a hand at that. “Annulled before you know it. We’ll get rid of that bite as well.”

Steve just sighed, ready to walk off and sulk in his room when the doorbell rang. His father continued to read the paper while his mother sorted through correspondences from the mail, knowing the doorman would answer it. And just as they expected, he did. And moments later, Chesley came to them with a man in a gray jumpsuit carrying a large duffle bag. It took absolutely everything in Steve to keep himself sitting and not jump into Gareth’s arms.

He wasn’t even looking at Steve, instead simply tipping his hat to his mother and father. Chesley cleared his throat.

“Exterminator, sir and ma’am.”

“I don’t remember hiring an exterminator”, Layton said.

“Do we have vermin in our home?”, Margaret nearly hissed.

“It won’t be a problem miss”, Gareth said. “I just need to inspect the problem areas of the house and then I can set up traps.”

“Layton, we’re having guests next week, we can’t have mice running around the place”, Margaret said, panic pitching her voice. “Chesley, have Tabitha show him around.”

“Oh, don’t bother Tabitha”, Steve finally spoke up and got to his feet. “I can show him around.”

The idea of little critters running around the house had her so frazzled, Margaret didn’t even fight him on it. It was only when they were nearly out of the room that she called out after them.

“Remember your virtue Steven!”

Steve would have groaned in embarrassment if he’d been with an actual stranger. As if he’d just fuck anyone who came through the door!

“She’s lovely”, Gareth said the moment they were deep enough in the hallway.

Steve couldn’t hold back anymore and he pushed Gareth against the wall as he kissed him. He had missed this. His actual family, genuine love, real affection. He would have scented Gareth if he didn’t know his mother would sniff it out immediately and make another comment about his virtue and tighten the leash even more.

“Are you okay?”, Gareth panted after the kiss. “They haven’t been hurting you?”

Steve shook his head and then grabbed his wrist to pull him into one of the guest rooms and locked the door.

“What’s the plan?”, he asked, voice hushed.

“You’re probably not gonna like it”, Gareth said as he set the duffle bag down and unzipped it.

---------------------------

“I realize I’ve yet to take Steve’s measurements”, Margaret said.

“He doesn’t appear to have grown much since college”, Layton commented.

“He’s had children, my dear. Plural. He’s put on weight, I just don’t know how much. It would be nice if he could fit into my wedding dress but we might need other options.”

Layton smiled. “You’ve always wanted to take him bridal shopping, ever since he presented.”

“Well what mother doesn’t dream of it?” She set down the letters in her hand, already thinking of the guest list. “I have measuring tape, maybe I should do it now.”

“He’s escorting the exterminator”, Layton reminded her.

“Don’t use the word ‘escorting’, it sounds indecent.”

While his folks were having that conversation, Steve was struggling to keep his scent calm. He couldn’t believe that this was the best plan they could come up with. But then again, it was pretty short notice, so he couldn’t blame them entirely. They had no idea what his parents would do to him or the pups while they were locked away in this dungeon. 

But still…

He could never tell the twins that he’d let this happen when they were older. He could just hear it now. ‘You’ll let us get kidnapped but we can’t go to a party?’

When they got to the nursery, he told Eleanor that she could take her break now. Steve wasn’t entirely sure what he’d tell her when she returned and there were no babies but that wasn’t important right now.

Violet was sound asleep in her crib. That was good. Vanessa was up and active, playing with a book but her attention was immediately grabbed by Gareth and Steve. She smiled big, arms going in the air and Gareth scooped her up. 

“You ready to get back home, kid?”

Vanessa’s reply was to grab for his hair and pull it towards her mouth. Gareth pulled it out of her grasp and then checked in on Violet, soundly asleep.

“Okay, Operation Cabbage Patch is a go.”

“Of course you guys would call it that”, Steve sighed as he carefully lifted Violet up. 

“Steven? Where did you go? I want to measure you for your dress”, his mother’s voice sounded from the hallway, causing both men to freeze. 

Steve kissed Gareth’s cheek, three times for his other three loves and then set Violet back down. He would have to put all his faith and trust into them while he kept his mother distracted. He walked out, closing the door behind him and calling out to his mother to keep her away from the nursery while Gareth continued the plan.

He set Vanessa down and then opened the bag he had brought along. Inside was soft and cushiony as well as strapping. He placed Violet inside and strapped her in just like it was a carseat. She only shifted slightly, rubbing her eye before settling again. Gareth kissed her forehead, then zipped the bag back up.

He put Vanessa in, and they were secured, foot to foot. Vanessa cooed a bit, but mostly just appeared curious. He just hoped she didn’t make too much noise as they moved.

Gareth carefully lifted the duffle bag by its straps. He wanted to cradle it, but knew that would look unnatural. He left the nursery and thankfully remembered his way back to the front door. A nondescript white van was waiting outside. Grant was at the wheel. As bad as it felt to only have the job half done, they figured it would have to be this way.

The Harringtons had let Steve go once and he went and became the pack omega to a band of musicians. Just as the group had expected, even if they were able to lay eyes on Steve, he wasn’t left alone for long enough to make a real escape. At least not when the girls’ wellbeing was on the line.

Gareth opened the back of the van just as Vanessa began to whine. He shut the doors and opened the bag. In preparation for the plan, car seats had been secured. The moment Gareth had the girls safe in their seats, he told Grant to go. 

----------------------

Eddie and Jeff both wished they could have been home while Gareth and Grant went through with the plan, but they had their own part to play. Steve’s video had been picked up both by news outlets and the gossip rags and Corroded Coffin needed to give their official statement. A police report had been filed, just to cover their bases.

And soon it would be out in the world that the Harringtons were under investigation. Jeff and Eddie went on a radio show, first apologizing to the fans for cutting their promotions short but hoping they’d understand the severity of the situation. By the time the interview was over, they both received a text from Grant simply stating ‘They’re home’.

For once, Jeff didn’t chastise Eddie’s reckless driving. Fuck anyone else on the road, they had to get back. Once they were home, the door was all but torn off its hinges.

And there they were. Vanessa, holding herself up with her hands on the couch. Violet, on her back, trying to eat her own foot. Jeff saw the moment Vanessa saw him, her lips spreading wide and bouncing on her feet in glee as he rushed to hold her. Her giggles were punctuated by the kisses he put all over her face.

Violet didn’t realize Eddie was in the room until she was already in his arms. He could tell by the scrunch in her face that she wanted to be mad at having her foot eating activity interrupted but once she saw who had interrupted it, all was forgiven. Eddie rubbed their cheeks together, feeling more like himself than he had in days. 

“They barely smell like him”, Jeff noted sadly. 

Before, Violet and Vanessa smelled like a combination of their parents. They sometimes carried notes of other pack members too, but Eddie, Steve, and Jeff were the most prevalent. The fact that they hardly carried any of Steve’s scent spoke volumes. 

“They’re home now”, Eddie said, reassuring himself just as much as Jeff. 

----------------------

Steve somehow survived the impromptu fitting without much of a beating to his self esteem. He hadn’t been good enough when he was playing three sports in high school, he definitely wasn’t going to be good enough after having twins. He foresaw plenty of lean meals in his future.

Gareth had wanted to leave a scent token with Steve, something to hold him over and soothe him now that he would be completely alone. As much as Steve yearned for it, he resisted. It was too risky to have around. Gareth ended up leaving him with something even better instead.

A phone.

Part 12

We're doin another socmed chapter! So just like before, comment or reblog with how you'd react in universe to the events so far, be it Steve's video, CC's abrupt schedule change or whatever and it'll show up in the next chapter :)

[stimxtastic]

frog themed jeff the doorman stimboard

💚 🐸 💚 | 💚 💚 | 💚 🐸 💚

[thcbcys]

NEW TAG DUMP + ADDED CHARACTERS.

THE OLD ONE IS MESSY

CHARACTER TAGS.

South Park

╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Craig Tucker ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Kenny McCormick ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Marjorine Stotch ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Tweek Tweak ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Tricia Tucker ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Christophe Ze Mole ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Scott Tenorman

Friday Night Funkin / Picos School

╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Cassandra ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Nene ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Keith / Boyfriend ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Elizabeth Dearest / Girlfriend ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Sky

Creepy Pasta

╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Nina The Killer ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Eyeless Jack ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Ben Drowned ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Jeff The Killer ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Homicidal Liu

Eddsworld

╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Tord Petrov Lyakhov ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Thomas Reich ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Matt James-Hertenstein ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Jon ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Fundead Kid ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Todd

Murder Drones / The Amazing Digital Circus

╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Cyn ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Uzi Doorman ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Serial Designation N ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Gangle

Dead By Daylight

╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Susie Lavoie ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Frank Morrison

Mouth Washing

╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Anya ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Daisuke

Hazbin Hotel / Helluva Boss

╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Blitzo ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Angel Dust

Undertale & Au's

╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Blueberry / Swap!Sans ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Chara

League Of Legends / Valorant

╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Pyke ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Evelynn ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Heartsteel Kayn ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Clove

Yandere Simulator

╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Ayano Aishi ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Raibaru Fumetsu

The Pumpkin rabbit Returns

╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Pumpkin Rabbit

Homicipher

╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Mr. Crawling

Spooky Month

╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Bob Velseb ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Lila

Happy Tree Friends

╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Flippy

Your Boyfriend

╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Peter

Movie killers

╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Billy Lenz

Steven universe

╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Steven Universe ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Blue Diamond

Sally Face

╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Sal Fisher

Original Characters

╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Mr. Fox ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Himari Furukawa ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Serial Designation A. ╰─ ✩ ┊Muse: Spider.

OUT OF CHARACTER TAGS.

╰─ ✩ ┊Mun: Posting ╰─ ✩ ┊Mun: Pictures ╰─ ✩ ┊Mun: Videos ╰─ ✩ ┊Mun: Music ╰─ ✩ ┊Mun: Aesthetic ╰─ ✩ ┊Mun: Venting ╰─ ✩ ┊Mun: Trigger Warning ╰─ ✩ ┊Mun: Promotion ╰─ ✩ ┊Mun: Self Promotion ╰─ ✩ ┊Mun: Roleplay Request ╰─ ✩ ┊Mun: Roleplay Starter ╰─ ✩ ┊Mun: Reposts ╰─ ✩ ┊Mun: Asks ╰─ ✩ ┊Mun: Meme's

[talkingharrystyles]

The only think I love about this stunt is that H literally gives zero energy to their wannabe relationship. They literally looks like they barely know each other, for the last pap walk he almost had heart eyes for a random doorman than to his very serious gf with who he plans wedding and family lmao. And when I read that she get there just to have her 5 seconds of fame, isn´t it always like that? They met somewhere, spend like 15 minutes together to have attention and photos and then he was seen alone. It almost looks like this stunt deal is like "Ok, Jeff, I´m gonna stunt again not even after a year of being single but I´m not gonna do anything, I´ll just be there and I don´t care". I´m not complaying at all, rather this than her clinging on him OW style but still it´s annoying and idk why he doesn´t give us something else when he´s obviously not on a break at all.

[october-faye]

The penultimate episode of Partner Track. The show has barely taken off, and now it has to stick its landing.

Ingrid drops by Nick's place to return the engagement ring. She looks like she's dreading the conversation. Not to rub it in (but also to totally rub it in), I'd like to ask her if this confrontation is easier than simply breaking up with him weeks ago?

She explains to Nick that she and Jeff have a history.

Girl!

👏 You 👏 slept 👏 with 👏 him 👏 once 👏 six years ago, never learned his name, and never saw him again. That's not history. That's barely a footnote. Look, I just summed up the entirety of it in one sentence.

Nick calls Jeff dark and tortured (LOL) and tells Ingrid to ask herself why she always chases the storm (LOL).

Jeff is not 'the storm'; he's that drizzly piss weather we get in London. Or maybe he means Ingrid's love life in general? Still not seeing it.

Nick tells her he'll have her stuff shipped over to her.

In case this is your last scene, Nick... uh... sorry. You did not deserve this shit. But also, you and Ingrid dated for a matter of months, and you can do better than a woman who's only sort of into you.

Opening credits.

Ingrid is at her apartment, microwaving a meal and looking sad. She must be missing Nick's cooking. But she forgets about all that when the doorman rings and asks if Jeff can come up. She says 'yes' and hurriedly tidies.

Jeff has bought dumplings (I suppose they were out of egg salad sandwiches?) but he sees Ingrid is already eating some. So I suppose he learned her preferred foods off-screen?

He tells Ingrid that he's cooled things off with Victoria, and she tells him that it's 100% over with Nick. They kiss.

The two actors are excellent screen kissers, by the way. It's an easy thing to forget about until you see actors who can only smash their mouths together in a way that just looks like assault.

Jeff and Ingrid agree to keep their relationship a secret in the office. Jeff reminds her that she jumped him in that same office. They giggle some more.

Cut to a montage where they walk past each other at work, eye-fucking so intensely that I'm surprised Ingrid doesn't get pregnant on the spot. Now I'm imagining the beautiful but insufferable and stupid baby they could make.

Seriously, everyone in the office has eyes. They'll see you two touching hands in the corridor as you pass each other. Do you think you're the first ones in the firm to have an affair? I shudder to imagine what a black light would reveal in your offices.

In the overly long montage, they hang around Ingrid's apartment while she dances sexily for him and strips before they have sex. They also make out in an elevator. These two only wish they were Meredith and Derek from Grey's Anatomy.

I'm making fun of them, but I do buy that they're having a lot of fun. It's a shame there weren't enough episodes in this season to let their early love affair play out more slowly so we could see what they're like as a couple when it's not all steamy looks and slow motion fucking.

The montage (finally) ends, and they're in bed. The dialogue tells us it's been a week and that Ingrid is going to a deal closing ceremony. Ingrid tells him there are three slots for Partner at the firm, and she thinks it'll be her, him and Dan who get it.

Jeff agrees and hands her a gift - it's a pretty diamond necklace with a rose pendant, (which is a callback to Rosecliff, where they met). Ingrid is touched, but she's still sad that she hasn't patched things up with Rachel and Tyler. Jeff tells her to give them time and keep moving forward.

They talk about ambition and Jeff tells Ingrid she lives for the gold star. She asks Jeff about his parents' expectations. Jeff tells her that he was the parent. He cooked and took care of his little sisters. His mother was mentally unwell (it's implied she was an addict due to their circumstances and the abuse from his father) and she set fire to a picture of the two of them because she said it had demons in it.

I like getting some backstory for Jeff, but again it's all tell and no show. They could've given him any other backstory, and it wouldn't matter because it isn't reflected enough in his behaviour. In fact, I half-suspect he might be lying about everything. I just don't know.

It's not the actor's fault. The writers waited too long to give us anything to care about with Jeff. But even this just feels like a set-up for the inevitable implosion of their relationship by the finale.

I do like these two as a couple, sort of. Which surprises me, because I wanted to murder Jeff in episodes 1 through 4, and intermittently thereafter.

If this had been better written, we could've had a solid enemies to lovers story. I've found it easier to find gifs on Tumblr for Paralegal Justin and Rachel's love story than for either of Ingrid's love interests. The side pairing was getting more fandom attention than the love triangle the show based a chunk of its marketing on. Whoops.

[dwarf-vader-of-middle-earth]

Ok so my American friends. Y'know the Tony's (the awards for Broadway shows)?

My old neighbor, and childhood friend who babysat me growing up, is the producer for them this year.

Like this man is famous legit. Goes traveling around the world with famous magicians (I've personally met like several America's Got Talent magicians who'd won in previous years, I've met a world famous balloon artist comedian magician, I've met Jeff McBride, like they're all friends with my neighbor, and so I grew up with these folks). Hell. My neighbor would just do levitation illusions on me in the middle of my driveway as a kid sometimes.

About 10 years ago he went on to be a producer for the hidden magic TV show "The Carbonaro Effect". Michael was the doorman at my friend's wedding like 4-5 years ago. I got to meet with him and his husband that night. I went to one of his shows in 2019 as well, but his husband wasn't there because their cat was sick, so he stayed behind to care for it.

Anyway, yeah. Now my friend, he's fucking producing the Tony Awards on Broadway tonight. Matt Schick. Dude's incredible, super kind, and I'm sad I only get to see him like once or twice a year even though he doesn't live too far from me. He's always traveling, so when I go to the city, he's basically never there. If he were, I'd totally hop on the train sooner and go chill at his place a while before heading to whatever event it is I'm there for.

[yourcomedyminute]

A PREVIEW OF YOUR COMEDY MINUTE WITH JEFF GREENBERG #StandUp #Comedian #NewYork #Crime #Bad #Train #Subway #Track #SecondAvenue #Bronx #Kids #Hopscotch #Fire #Help #Old #Doorman #Machete #Shoplifting #Comedy #Funny #Humor #Live #Stream #fyp #JeffGreenberg 

This is just a clip from the interview with Jeff. The full interview premieres January 31st at 7:00 PM (EST) 

If you would like to be a guest on Your Comedy Minute please contact me

[jaqiqi-blog]

Last old art post for the time cuz gettin my pc again soon!

Heer wii goooo

Old dbd art, the doorman and a Jeff cosmetic. Jeff cosmetic was made for a lil dbd contest thing for a cosmetic. I wanted a one man band skin just for a silly skin cause dbd doesn't have enough silly skins

These two are art from my dreams four eyed girl had I believe different personality based off the combo of open and closed eyes. Saw both sets opened and the bottom set closed. Never the top set. Something in me figured I didn't want to see when only the bottom was closed. The other one was quite a vivid dream for some reason. I was exploring this wooden beam area with a cod pov, found these shattered windows from portal with what originally were thought to be vines. After more exploring they turned out to be tentacles (I shot at them and they came to attack me basically)

This next piece is a special one

My friend is doing some streamin and he wanted like a goofy ass background with the plan of having like some transparent dancing gifs in the empty space. The gif part didn't work out so well, but the bg Goin strong still lol

Little bit of pokemon art. Halloween one is my favorite bugmons, foresty cubone and marowak are fusions wit bulba and venosaur

Last is two random lil paintings cause they wouldn't have fit other themes lol. First image is a jack in the box fused with a resurrected cat and the 2nd image is another dnd character. Tentacle Squelch, a kenku with a big ol secret about them that I can't disclose on the off-chance that they check my Tumblr lol

Okiiii hava good one!

[docrotten]

MOTHER’S DAY (1980) – Episode 261 – Decades Of Horror 1980s

“You get what you deserve in them Deep Barons, you lez-beans! You won’t be causing no one no trouble no more!” Really? That’s all you got? Join your faithful Grue Crew – Crystal Cleveland, Chad Hunt, Bill Mulligan, and Jeff Mohr – as they celebrate one of their favorite holidays Troma-style with Mother’s Day (1980).

Decades of Horror 1980s Episode 261 – Mother’s Day (1980)

Join the Crew on the Gruesome Magazine YouTube channel! Subscribe today! Click the alert to get notified of new content! https://youtube.com/gruesomemagazine

Gruesome Magazine is partnering with the WICKED HORROR TV CHANNEL (https://wickedhorrortv.com/) which now includes video episodes of Decades of Horror 1980s and is available on Roku, AppleTV, Amazon FireTV, AndroidTV, and its online website across all OTT platforms, as well as mobile, tablet, and desktop.

Two brothers kidnap and brutalize three women for the pleasure of their demented mother.

Directed by: Charles Kaufman

Writing Credits: Charles Kaufman, Warren Leight

Produced by:

Alexander Beck (executive producer)

Michael Herz (associate producer)

Charles Kaufman (producer)

Lloyd Kaufman (associate producer}

Michael Kravitz (producer)

Cinematography by: Joseph Mangine

Editing by: Daniel Loewenthal

Production Design by: Susan Kaufman

Art Direction by: Sandy Hamilton

Assistant Art Director: Rex Piano

Costume Design by: Ellen Lutter

Special Makeup Effects by: Josie Caruso, Rob E. Holland

Selected Cast:

Nancy Hendrickson as Abbey

Deborah Luce as Jackie

Tiana Pierce as Trina

Gary Pollard as Ike (credited as Holden McGuire)

Michael McCleery as Addley (credited as Billy Ray McQuade)

Beatrice Pons as Mother (credited as Rose Ross)

Robert Collins as Ernie

Peter Fox as The ‘Dobber’ (credited as Karl Sandys)

Luisa Marsella as Terry (credited as Marsella Davidson)

Kevin Lowe as Ted

Scott Lucas as Storekeeper

Ed Battle as Doorman

Robert Carnegie as Tex

Stanley Kaufman as Older Man at Pool Party

Mother’s Day, directed by Charles Kaufman and featuring an admirable performance from Beatrice Pons as “Mother,” looks far better than it deserves to look. Except for Pons and cinematographer Joseph Mangine, Mother’s Day features a group of relative novices, and yet, the acting, story, and humor propel this film from beginning to end, even though it’s a bit tough to watch in places. Hey! The three lead victims of Mother’s clan even have story arcs! Eli Roth’s favorite movie can’t be all bad, can it?

At the time of this writing, Mother’s Day is available to stream from Shudder, Tubi, PlutoTV, and several PPV sources. The movie is available on physical media from Vinegar Syndrome in a 2-disc Region Free Set: 4K Ultra HD + Blu-ray.

Every two weeks, Gruesome Magazine’s Decades of Horror 1980s podcast will cover another horror film from the 1980s. The next episode’s film, chosen by Jeff, will be Roadgames (1981), directed by Richard Franklin (Patrick, Psycho II) and starring Stacy Keach and Jamie Lee Curtis. Get ready for some Ozploitation!

Please let them know how they’re doing! They want to hear from you – the coolest, grooviest fans – so leave them a message or comment on the Gruesome Magazine Youtube channel, on the Gruesome Magazine website, or email the Decades of Horror 1980s podcast hosts at feedback@gruesomemagazine.com.

Check out this episode!