#jay wasnt even my choice its just my initials that i started going by as like. plausible deniability that i wanted to change my name
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borealing · 1 year ago
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im gonna go off on one in the tags pls enjoy
#ive been going by jay online since i was 13 irl since i was 15/16 and my mum cant get used to it#me my friend and both our mums hung out last week and i heard my mum telling his mum 'i just cant get used to [their] name. they want to be#called /jay/ but i just cant do it' literally everyone else including my brother and my dad uses my chosen name#apart from when theyre around my mother! because her force of disgust is definitely more important than my agency and want to be called by#my own name... i have been thinking about wanting to be called another name like. interchangably with my name#and i think id go with yasha. its the diminutive of jay so like. if we friends i want to be yasha x#but also realising how much i want to have autonomy over my name came from picking a name in 2021 for practise in chinese#and my friend helping me decide between something that sounds similar (林植 cos the first character kinda sounds like my eng surname) and a#more literal translation where i was like the translation of jay is 松鸦 i could use that haha and she went but the 鸦 character is awful#you could be 松雅! its then a pun and makes me sound fancy. and i was so happy just making choices and getting to like#pick my own name that peoplw could use. really a revelation. anyway i was kinda on hold for a bit living at home but now im freer hearing#her go on that 'jays choice of name is so hard on me' rant really made me..... start thinking and reminiscing about my name. and me. u know#jay wasnt even my choice its just my initials that i started going by as like. plausible deniability that i wanted to change my name#i remember thinking more about it when i was younger and deciding against other names Specifically because it would be easier to go#'its just my initials!' yeah. im 25 is it too late to change names#sorry for long rambly disjointed rant. hope this was enlightening if u made it this far
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cookiedough77 · 5 months ago
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PLEASEEEEEE IM DYING TO KNOW ABOUT YOUR OCSSSSS 🛐🛐🛐🛐🛐🛐
oh my gah
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well heres some... refrences i made a while back GAH I NEED TO DRAW MORE OF THEM UH UH UH
man ok so i put alot of their lore into a google doc ill just like copy and paste alot of it here:
Okok more of a deep dive on these guys because i wanna do more with them
OK JAY BACKSTORY
So initially, jays mom like wiped out a bunch of superheroes, like when jay was really young (he cant remember it) and shortly after, what very little heroes were left or heroes who were only “super” because of the gear they had, an order was created, to try and take her down
His entire life he was raised by his evil ass mom, mainly manipulating him inot thinking humans were bad (they are generally human but with so much magic into their system that they really arent anymore i guess, similar to like a vampire or a werewolf or something). Its not that jay didnt believe his mother but more of he knew something was wrong with what she was doing, how she was going about things
His mother was a wanted criminal for years, and she was mainly destructive or whatever because her husband died idk-
Im making this up as i go, her husband died from too much magic intake? Like he couldnt handle it, but jays mother blamed humanity because “they were the ones holding him back from his potential” 
Jay barely knew his father, so its not like he had a super connection to him
Now while he was growing up, he didnt actually see his mother attack superheros, mainly took her anger out on civilian, even then she didnt like kill them or anything. So he didnt see his mother as a bad person….. UNTIL 
A new superhero actually DID show up, or merely, one that was “taken down” and came back, and maybe or maybe not jays mother wanted him to kill whoever it was and hes like “uh NO????” she does it herself and jay immediately wants out of this, but he doesnt exactly have a choice, so he starts disobeying her for like a year, and then…
Another superhero shows up, a young one, a new one, a vulnerable one. Im not exactly sure how kylo and jay interact and stuff at first because i guess its the ���beginning” not the backstory idk sooooooo save that for later!!!
Anyway well i guess kylos next which is complicated man
Gah you’ve heard about this, one of a bunch of orphans actually survived some mutation and that was kylo, who initially wasnt even given a name, kylos name shows up later
So because theres a “superhero shortage” the order decided instead of waiting, to just make more, no matter how, they just needed strong enough heroes to take down any threats, including jays mom, and yes i know i need a name for her
Now remember when i talked about kylo having “siblings” yeah so there are others, just none of the orphans, “failed attempts” before kylo, too much of the mutation so they're not really “usable” and they science people are trying their hardest to make them “work” they also dont see them as real people!!! Hahahaha
Anyway kylo was kinda like raised like this, usually isolated from the other attempts because she was “perfect” and it was mainly two scientists taking care of kylo, they were new, and didn’t have much experience in the field, kylo was their first “assignment” and btw idk they’re a couple, and when kylo turned 10 they both suggested before kylo going out and “being a superhero” that she should like interact with real people, she looked human enough, and she could blend in, and learn like basic empathy from other people/kids
The order approved this and those are basically kylos adoptive parents.
BUT not before wiping all of kylos memory!!! Hahah they’ve tested it out before, and decide to use it on kylo, to not mess with anything, and the memory just doesnt “go away” its like a polaroid camera and rolls of memories spills out, and they keep it safe, locked away
So kylo spends like 3 years homeschooled, and realizes that shes “different” than others (kylos parents didnt really explain anything to them (they werent allowed)). So she comes up with a dumb constume like all heros and decides to make good use out of it
This all leads up to the actual beginning of the story which is like i dont even know where to start but like i can tell you that kylo and jay team up, obviously jay has more experience with his abilities and is like the main person to take down his mother, but kylo definitely helps
The order “meets” kylo and lets her stay obviously, and jay… well they’re wary of him, and make him stay in the building (where the order resides) to keep an eye on him, and this is basically where jay stays until like hes 18
Jays “indenity” is quickly released to the public, an requirement from the order, and jay tries to do whatever they say to make him seem trustworthy (because he is, my poor boy), all while, kylo is instructed to not tell ANYONE who they are, and kylo follows the rules at first, but over the years she likes to challenge them alot.
Jay and kylo quickly become friends and trust eachother obviously uh uh, yeah, theirs other villains of course, and kylo and jay become friends even while civilians but kylo is told to “not get so close” but they try anyway bruh idk
A lot of things happen and ill probably draw some stuff out or talk about it because man theres so much up in this noggin and it yearns to be free
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