#jawaharlal o'shea

[incorrectspyschoolquotes]

Erica: Has anyone seen Chip?

Jawa: Hold on, I’ve got this. *Ahem*

Jawa: 🎵Bill Nye the Science Guy🎵

Chip: *Slamming the door open* BILL! BILL! BILL! BILL!

[incorrectspyschoolquotes]

Spy School characters as quotes from Overly Sarcastic Productions’ “We’re So Sorry” video

(Link is in the notes)

Ben: I’m sorry for mistranslating that ancient Egyptian curse, and accidentally getting 15 archeologists killed. On the plus side, I got this nifty necklace out of it. On the downside, I’m pretty sure if I ever take it off I might get eaten by a mummy.

Erica: I’m sorry for refusing to cry when Baldr died, thereby forestalling his resurrection and condemning him to hell. I just don’t like expressing my emotions publicly.

Mike: I’m sorry I didn’t address Wakanda in my African history video. It’s been a crazy couple months for anthropologists everywhere.

Zoe: I’m sorry that I invented a time machine, went back to steal the Library of Alexandria, shrunk it down Braniac-style and put it in a bottle, and then burned the foundations to cover my tracks.

Chip: I’m sorry for committing the unforgivable sin of human transmutation and accidentally disintegrating my brother. Sometimes I can still hear his voice...

Jawa: I’m sorry for suggesting Robespierre just guillotine everyone. I thought the sarcasm was obvious, but clearly he did not.

Warren: I’m sorry I stole the horses of St. Mark from Constantinople. I didn’t want to be the one guy at the crusade not pulling their weight. ...Also, I’m sorry about the Crusades.

Murray: I’m sorry for using my three wishes for cheesecake instead of world peace.

Nefarious: I’m sorry I sunk Atlantis. I swear I had no idea that’s what that button did.

Ashley: I’m sorry. I caused the Tunguska Event by plugging a power bar into itself for infinite energy. The good news is it worked!

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Jawa: I’m bored.

Chip: Wanna go hang gay pride flags at Chik-Fil-A drive-thrus?

Jawa: *Smiling* You complete me.

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Chip: I’m bored.

Jawa: Wanna binge Bill Nye the Science Guy?

Chip: DO I?!

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Hope y’all like Chawa because I have no ideas for quotes except ones featuring that right now

Chip: I guess you could say I’ve “fallen” for you.

Jawa: You literally just rolled down eight flights of stairs. How the f*ck are you even alive?!

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Jawa: It'll be fine. It'll be fine. It's just a crush-

Chip, walking in: Hey!

Jawa: I HAVE TO GAY- I MEAN GO

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Chip: Please, don’t do this.

Jawa: I have to.

Chip: After all we’ve been through!

Jawa: I’m sorry, my love.

Jawa: *Places a +4 card*

Jawa: Uno.

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Chip: Hey Jawa, wanna hear a chemistry joke?

Jawa:

Chip: Is -is that a no?

Jawa: Oh, I'm sorry. Were you expecting a reaction?

*Airhorns*

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Okay, everyone, I’m presenting my random ships/headcanons because I run this blog

Erica is asexual

Chip x Jawa (they’re both bi)

Zoe is into hand-sewing

...that’s it. I’m gonna go do another re-read of the series.

[incorrectspyschoolquotes]

Jawa: Friendly reminder to not remove knives from stab wounds!

Chip: Well, what if I’m ready to immediately cauterise the wound?

Erica: Good luck cauterising internal arterial hemorrhaging.

Mike: Ooh, looks like things are heating up in the stab wound fandom!

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Chip: Or we could do this the old-fashioned way! *Whips out a Molotov cocktail*

Jawa: HOW DID YOU MAKE THAT SO FAST?!

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Jawa: If we keep accusing people of being the Zodiac Killer, we'll eventually get it right.

Chip: Maybe the real Zodiac Killer was the friends we made along the way.

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Spy School characters as John Mulaney quotes

Because I’m running out of ideas!

Ben:

Erica:

Mike:

Zoe:

Chip:

Jawa:

Alexander:

Catherine:

Cyrus:

Warren:

Murray:

Joshua:

Ashley:

Nefarious:

[incorrectspyschoolquotes]

Chip: Erica, if Jawa and I were drowning, who would you save?

Erica: You guys don't know how to swim?

Jawa: It's a hypothetical question.

Chip: Yeah, who would you save?

Erica: My time and effort.

[incorrectspyschoolquotes]

-All standing around a broken coffeepot-

Erica: Who broke it? I'm not mad, I just want to know.

Warren: I did! I broke it, Erica.

Erica: No you didn't. Mike?

Mike: Don't look at me! Look at Ben!

Ben: What? I didn't break it.

Mike: Huh. That's weird. How'd you even know it was broken?

Ben: Because it's sitting right there in front of us and it's broken.

Mike: Suspicious.

Ben: No, it's not!

Chip: If it matters, which, probably not, but- Alexander was the last one to use it.

Alexander: Liar! I don't drink the kind of coffee we have here!

Jawa: Oh, really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?

Alexander: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles! Everyone knows that!

Warren: Okay, everyone! Let's not fight! I broke it! Let me pay for it, Erica!

Erica: No. Who broke it?

Ben: Erica, Zoe's been awfully quiet.

Zoe: Really?!

Ben: Yeah, really.

Zoe: Oh my gosh!

*All clamoring*

Erica, to the camera: I broke it. It burned my hand so I punched it. I predict ten minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with war paint on their faces and a pig's head on a stick.

Erica: I thought things were getting a bit too chummy around here.

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Zoe: Hey, is anyone else d-

Mike: Dead inside?

Ben: Depressed?

Jawa: Drained of all forms of energy?

Zoe: -Done with the assignment. What is wrong with you people?!