#jamezbot

[brightlybound]

7-Up

I was tagged by @takearisk-ao3 to share seven lines from a current WIP then tag seven others!

Because I've recently found out that I absolutely love writing Harry and Teddy (age 3 in this, if my math is correct), here are 7 lines from the next chapter of Erased:

“Who’s Ginny?”

"She's Ron's sister," said Harry smoothly.

“Oh.” Teddy’s face scrunched up in thought, and his hair rippled from blue to purple and back again. “Is she pretty?”

Harry barked a laugh of surprise. “That’s a strange question to ask.”

“Oh,” said Teddy again. “Is she nice?”

“D’you know,” said Harry, as he pulled the boy carefully around a group of rowdy teenagers, “she is quite nice. And she is quite pretty.”

“Good,” said Teddy, before the conversation derailed entirely. “Look! A bat!”

Open to anyone who wants to play! I'm tagging @jamezbot for bot laughs.

[thedistantdusk]

Have you ever written a Ron Weasley centric fic?

I’ve written a couple Romione fics, but I admit they’re not my strong suit 😅

Of course, no one can compare to the “work” of @jamezbot in Ron Weasley and the Midnight Crew…

[dot-adsty]

For the HPRomione Discord Popcorn, @acnelli gave me the prompt "flying higher than ever before." I tag @jamezbot with the prompt "do you remember, the 21st night of September?"

This drabble takes place during the summer of 6th year, right before the Order goes to rescue Harry. It is rated G.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Flying Higher Than Ever Before

For the first time, Ron was glad not to be included in the Order’s meeting. It was rare, now, that he was excluded from an Order meeting, since he was of age and about to join them on a mission to rescue his best mate from his insufferable relatives. Typically, during the rare times he was excluded, he would complain and moan and try to force his way in. But today, he didn’t care that only the “more senior” members were meeting. It meant that he could get his mum off of his back and take a much needed break from cleaning the burrow. It also meant that he could finally, finally, talk to Hermione.

His mum was doing everything in her power to keep them apart. Which was tough–they needed to talk about their plans (which he was sure Hermione had many of). But more importantly, they just needed to talk. The last time they were alone was the night she arrived at the burrow. She had been in a right state, sobbing to Ron about what she had done to her parents. He did his best to comfort her, though he had to admit he wasn’t yet comfortable around crying people.

He definitely could have done better. He was doing alright with comforting her, but when she needed a tissue, all he could offer her was his sleeve. He had made a mental note to buy a handkerchief for her—for the next time. But there hadn’t been a next time. Instead, they were forced to do an ungodly amount of cleaning tasks alone. But now was his chance, and he was determined to let her know that he was there for her—that he could do better.

He quietly searched the burrow, looking for Hermione as quickly as he could so that they could spend the most amount of time together. But he couldn’t find her. Fear hit him deep in his gut, but he shook it off, deciding to search the grounds before letting panic overtake him.

He had checked the garden, the shed, and the perimeter of his house, panicking more with each step that he didn’t find her. He had one last idea of where she could be—one last hope—and thankfully he was correct.

He couldn’t remember which summer Hermione had found him in his secret spot in the grove of trees behind the burrow. He couldn’t even remember why he was there that evening, though it probably had something to do with the twins picking on him. But he could remember her face when she saw him. It was one of relief and of excitement, likely mirrored in his expression upon finally finding her right now.

Initially, at the time, he had been a bit peeved that she had discovered his secret place. It was secret after all. But he quickly changed his mind, and the spot became one they would sneak away to together. Not to do anything inappropriate, mind. But just to be together, to decompress from a tough day or worry about what Harry had gotten himself into, once again.

“Trying to skive out of housework?”, Ron asked Hermione jokingly. She jumped at his voice, not aware that he was there, but offered him a small smile as soon as she noticed him. Ron knew that smile, and he knew that it was not genuine. Concerned, he sat next to her.

She had made a spot for herself where she had a view of the land, the trees parting and the small hill they were on dipping into the abyss. If he hadn’t known better, he would say she looked peaceful, her curls blowing slightly in the wind as she looked on to the sunset.

He placed a hand cautiously onto her shoulder, not sure if it was the right action to take. She immediately burst into tears, making him even less sure of his move. At least he had a handkerchief this time. He silently offered it to her and she loudly blew her nose before placing herself closer into his arms to the point that she was nearly in his lap. Maybe he had done the right thing.

Out of nowhere, she began listing off all of the things that frightened her. She started with her parents and the fear that she would never see them again. In between hiccups, she moved onto Harry and the fear that they wouldn’t be able to protect him; that they wouldn’t be able to destroy all of the Horcruxes and it would all be for nought. Eventually, she landed on their upcoming mission. They still didn’t have the exact details of their mission but they knew they would be polyjuicing into Harry as a decoy and flying to a safe house. She was terrified that something would go wrong. Even more so, she was terrified of having to fly especially with the possibility of needing to fight whilst doing so.

At her last comment, Ron nearly laughed. Not that there was anything humorous about what she said. But after hearing her fears about loads of things he could do nothing about, she finally mentioned one he could. He immediately stood and took her hand.

“What?”, Hermione asked, looking perplexed.

“We can practice,” Ron stated confidently.

“Practice what?”, she asked, looking even more confused, but standing up nevertheless.

“You said you’re worried about flying and using your wand; we can practice that.” Hermione's eyes went wide. “It’s really not that bad,” he reassured, “and like you always say; practice makes perfect.”

She still looked unsure, but nodded hesitantly, not able to find a way to say no. He had finally found a way to convince her to do something; by using her logic against her.

Ron nearly skipped to their shed, finally feeling like he was useful. They tip-toed to the brooms, in case the Order meeting had finished, though there was no sign of them when Ron grabbed his broom. He mounted it and motioned for Hermione to sit in front of him.

She sighed heavily but did as he suggested. He wrapped one arm around her while placing the other on the broom handle in front of her.

“I’ve got you,” he whispered in her ear. Even with the sun setting and the light low, he could make out the goose pimples that ran down her neck when he whispered. Because of their position, he was pushed up against her back. The closeness made his stomach twist, but again he tried to quiet his body’s reactions, telling himself that he was only this close to her to help her feel safe, not for any other more nefarious reasons.

As he kicked off, she squealed, quickly putting her hand to her mouth to quiet herself, then just as quickly putting that hand back on the broom, terrified that she had let go in the first place. He brought her past the trees and out of sight. He kept going higher but evened out as he noticed her hands squeezing the broom tighter with every foot he lifted them.

“This alright?”, he asked and she carefully nodded her head as if any sudden movements would bring them crashing down.

“It’s okay,” he reassured. “I won’t let you fall.”

She nodded her head again, only a fraction of a bit more enthusiastically. He could feel her start to shake and he tightened his grip around her waist.

“You said you wanted to practice using your wand while flying,” Ron said. “You’ll have to let go with one hand to do that.”

Even though Ron could not see her face he could feel the death glare she made at his suggestion.

“I know,” she said tightly. Shaking, she gingerly peeled her right hand off of the broom and reached for her wand in her sleeve. She slowly began to wave it, pretending to cast spells.

“Good,” Ron said. “See it’s not so bad.” He swore he could hear her almost growl at his comment.

With a cheeky smile he added: “If you really want to be prepared, we should be moving, not just hovering.”

He felt her sigh and took that as permission to go. He slowly began moving them around, making soft turns at first and then beginning to make sharper ones.

At a particularly sharp turn, Hermione began to lose her balance and instinctively grasped his arm around her. As he slowed, she continued to hold on to him, ignoring the pretence of pretending to use magic.

“I hate this,” she said softly.

“I know,” Ron replied as sympathetically as he could. “Do you want to land?”

“No,” she said, much to Ron's surprise. “I need to keep practising.”

“Okay,” Ron said and he began to move again. Hermione began to do small spells, including one which evaporated a cloud, a spell Ron had never seen and told her how impressive it was. His comment seemed to give her some confidence and she began to cast spells with more ease. They kept at it, with Ron manoeuvring them while Hermione did magic and the two of them randomly bursting into laughter at the absurdity of it all. But, all too quickly, the sun had set and they were surrounded by darkness. Ron slowly descended them, not thinking about dealing with his mother’s wrath towards them for disappearing but instead basking in Hermione's expression, one which had been fearful but now was pleased; she was smiling. Smiling because of something he had done.

[annerbhp]

Are you by any chance a plumber?

wouldn’t you like to know

[remedialpotions]

The Forbidden Forest

For my friend @jamezbot 🤖 and his love of this particular, super-canonical, not-at-all-ridiculous ship.

I cannot emphasize this enough: this is a crack fic.

***

It was the clicking of Ron’s fingers in front of his face that finally snapped Harry back to reality.

“Mate,” said Ron, half-laughing as he sat back down on his bed, “what’s wrong with you? I’d say you look like you’ve seen a ghost, but that’s actually not all that strange around here-“

“No,” Harry interrupted. His voice felt hollow, detached from him somehow. “Definitely not a ghost.”

He still struggled to believe it - even after all of the bizarre things that had happened in his life - but what he had seen had been very, very real.

“Where’ve you been, anyway?” Ron swung his long legs over the side of his bed, feet flat on the stone floor. “It’s nearly midnight.”

“Erm-“ Harry gulped. “Just... out. With Ginny.”

A grimace flashed over Ron’s face, then he said, “then why’ve you got this look on your face? Did you ditch her?” he demanded. “I swear to Merlin, Harry, if you-“

“No! No, nothing like that.”

“All right, well then - oh fuck, it’s not Malfoy, is it?”

“No, no - all right, listen. Something - something happened,” he began. “But if I tell you, you’ve got to promise not to tell anyone else.”

“What, not even Hermione?”

“Fine, but just her.” Harry paused, eyes darting around the quiet dorm room. Neville’s garbled snores sounded from behind the closed curtains of one bed; Seamus and Dean’s beds were both empty. They’d both been out past curfew more and more lately. “So listen, Ginny and I were out on a, erm, a walk-“

Ron’s features twisted into disgust. “Ugh, come on, mate, I know what happens on these so-called walks-“

“That’s not the point! Just listen.”

“Harry,” Ginny laughed against his lips, her fingers curling in his hair, “we’re going to get caught-“

“So what?” Harry kissed her again. “What’re they gonna do? Expel us?”

“I know, but-“ Ginny glanced toward the greenhouse, where lantern light flickered behind the dingy glass. “Professor Sprout is still - mmm - still in there-“

Even as Harry couldn’t stop himself kissing her again, it did occur to him that he didn’t particularly relish being found in such a compromising state by anyone, let alone a teacher.

“Yeah, I reckon you’re right.”

Ginny grinned, her face still close to his. “I know.”

“I’ve got an idea, though. Come on.”

Ginny extracted herself from his lap, and they stood, then started off hand-in-hand across the school grounds. The sun had just dipped below the horizon, bathing everything in dusky blue light. All was quiet and calm; even the Whomping Willow could not be bothered to wave its branches at them as they passed, and Hagrid’s hut was completely dark.

“The forest?” said Ginny as they approached the row of trees that marked its perimeter. “Seriously?”

“Yeah, it’s perfect. No one ever goes in here.”

“You don’t think there’s a reason for that?”

“Can you get on with the story already?” interrupted Ron. “‘Cause I know I said I’m all right with it, and I am, but I don’t love hearing about you and my little sister looking for a place to get off-“

“And I don’t really love telling you about it,” replied Harry. “But if you’d just let me get to the point-“

“Sorry, sorry. Go on, then.”

“So where are the centaurs?” asked Ginny as they wound through the thick maze of trees.

“Way further in,” Harry assured her. “We don’t need to go that far.”

“And Grawp?”

“He won’t bother us.” Harry slipped his arm around her waist, pulling her close. “He likes Hermione best, anyway.”

Ginny’s laugh sounded through the quiet air. “Poor Ron’s always got competition.”

Harry chuckled and leaned over, intent on kissing her cheek, when the sound of a twig snapping caused Ginny to freeze in her arms.

“What was that?”

Harry shrugged. “Thestral, maybe?”

“Yeah, maybe.” She didn’t sound convinced.

“Here, let’s just go over-“ Harry’s words died in his throat, because now he wasn’t just hearing the sound of twigs snapping; deep, very human-sounding murmurs met their ears.

“Oh my God,” Ginny breathed. “It’s Dean and Seamus.”

“You think so?”

“Definitely.” Even in the low light, he could see her eyes gleaming with mischief. “Sounds like two blokes, doesn’t it?”

“Yeah, it actually does.”

“We’ve got to investigate,” said Ginny, her voice a low, excited whisper. “Please? We won’t let on that we’re there or anything, I just want to see-“

“You want to see your ex-boyfriend snogging his new boyfriend?”

Ginny nodded, gleeful. “Yeah, I do! Let’s go see. Please?”

Harry, admittedly, was curious - he had heard the rumors, he’d suspected, but he didn’t really know, not for certain - and anyway, it didn’t really matter what Ginny asked of him. He’d do it without a second thought.

And so they crept, careful to keep their footsteps light lest they make their presence known, in the direction of the voices. The thing was, the closer they got, the less it sounded like Dean or Seamus. There was no sign of Seamus’ Irish brogue, nor Dean’s London accent. And these voices didn’t sound like those of teenagers, either: they were timeworn and mature.

“‘M so glad ter be with yeh again,” came a gruff voice from within a particularly thick copse of trees. “Feels like it’s been ages.”

Harry’s stomach leapt into his throat - this was Hagrid.

“Merlin’s pants,” Ginny breathed. “Who do you think he’s with? Madame Maxime?”

But before Harry could answer, another voice - this one just as familiar and yet just as surprising - responded.

“I’ve missed you as well, Rubeus. I regret how little time we’ve been able to spend together lately.”

It was a voice Harry would have known on his death bed. It was one that had imparted wisdom and had comforted him in his darkest moments. One that had been a constant source of safety and stability in an increasingly uncertain world.

It was none other than Albus Dumbledore.

Next to him, Ginny positively quivered with excitement.

“We should go,” Harry muttered, trying to steer Ginny by the waist. “We shouldn’t be here-“

“Are you kidding?” Ginny hissed back. “We have to go see this.”

As she crept, catlike, through the forest, Harry had no choice but to follow in her footsteps.

“You’re fucking with me,” said Ron decisively. “And I mean, twenty points to Gryffindor for creativity, but-“

“I’m not,” Harry insisted. “I’m really, really not. When have I ever lied to you?”

“I don’t know, but maybe you’ve decided to start-“

“With this?!”

“I don’t know!” Ron threw his hands helplessly in the air. “Maybe Ginny’s put you up to it, to see what you can get me to believe-“

“She hasn’t. And anyway, the story’s not over.”

“Look!” Ginny pointed into the copse of trees, her face a mixture of shock and utter delight. “Oh my God, this is mad.”

Harry wasn’t sure what he expected to see, but it certainly wasn’t Dumbledore, in spangled, midnight-blue robes, leaning back against the trunk of a tree with Hagrid pressed closely against him. Their Care of Magical Creatures professor positively dwarfed their wizened Headmaster, but neither seemed to mind. Dumbledore, in fact, seemed to relish it as he entwined his long, wrinkled fingers in Hagrid’s bushy beard.

“Are we hallucinating?” asked Ginny. “We’ve got to be, right?”

“I don’t think I could hallucinate something like this.”

As they watched, rapt, Hagrid wrapped a massive hand around Dumbledore’s thin, knobby one. “It pains me ter see yeh hurting, Albus,” said Hagrid as he pressed a whiskery kiss to Dumbledore’s blackened fingers. “Are yeh sure it’s worth it?”

“It is for the greater good.” Dumbledore rose up on his toes, reaching toward Hagrid, and as their lips met, their beards brushed. “Soon, my love, it will all make sense.”

“My love,” Ron repeated weakly. “You’re sure you heard right?”

“Oh, quite.”

“So...” Ron raked his fingers through his hair. “So Hagrid and Dumbledore are-“

“Yeah.”

“D’you reckon they’re... er...” Ron gestured uncomfortably, waving his large hands awkwardly around. “Y’know-“ He laced his fingers together; his implication was clear.

“I didn’t exactly have a chance to ask,” Harry retorted.

“Well, yeah, I just - how would that work, exactly? Hagrid’s so much...” Words failing him, Ron resorted again to gesticulating wildly. “Er - bigger-”

“I don’t know!”

Harry’s sharp words rang out in the silence of the dorm, and they both froze as there came a rustling of sheets from Neville’s bed.

“Well,” said Ron, once Neville had resumed snoring, “makes sense when you think about it, doesn’t it? The way Hagrid’s always talked about him, I just thought he admired him - great wizard, and all that - but I s’pose it must be more.”

“Yeah, I s’pose it is.”

“But,” added Ron, pointing a finger at Harry in mock seriousness, “I really don’t want any more stories about you snogging my sister.”

“I don’t want to tell any more of them, so we’re good.”

[adenei]

Hi there! I’m most interested in your answer to 19, please.

Hiiiii! Thanks for the ask, friend!

19. any new fics to start next year

This answer is probably going to shock you, but I don't have anything planned for the new year, which is surprising even to myself!

I suppose @jamezbot is expecting me to say I'm finally going to start that Romione story inspired by Shrek, but we'll see haha.

I'm sorry for that terribly disappointing answer!

Send me an End of Year Ask!

[sweeethinny]

for the fanfic asks, 1, 5, and 15? <3

hi sunshineee, thank you

1. If you’re an author, how many WIPs do you currently have? (Be honest!)

20 lol  but I’ll probably just keep writing 5 of those ahahahah

5. What’s a crackship you love?

Harry/Daphne, thanks to @jamezbot

15. Post the last line you wrote without context.

The woman did not seem to have swallowed the lie, her hard green eyes studying Ginny like an eagle, and she wondered where else she had seen that expression.

send me more Fanfic Asks

[breaniebree]

Tagged by @reerox67 and @whiffingbooks and @jamezbot to post the last line I wrote.  This is from yesterday as I haven’t written anything yet today.  PS - you get an extra three words LOL.

Ginny scowled.  “Oh, if someone said that to me they’d have bat bogeys coming out of their nose before they could even blink!”

Harry grinned.  “Noted.”

I tag @thedistantdusk @velvethopewrites and @celtics534 to do the same.

[be11atrixthestrange]

Okay but like can we have a link to this AI writing bot? I wanna try it

It’s not an online thing, just something @jamezbot made :). I think he’s taking commissions! 🙃

[esloon]

For @jamezbot

[thedistantdusk]

Where noticed ING, batch 😡

I’m so disappointed this wasn’t @jamezbot trolling me.

[brightlybound]

This post is truly for @jamezbot

rb this and tag where youre from and if eating raw tomatoes like apples is a weird/gross concept to you

[justmattycakes]

Shuffle Game

rules: we’re snooping in your playlist. put your entire music library on  shuffle and list the first 10 songs and then choose 10 victims

thanks @evil-pony for the tag and sorry it took me forever to get around to this lol. Shuffling my spotify ‘liked’ list

Swords - MIA

Vibin - Habstrakt

Carnival of Souls - Spectre

Dissolve - Liquid Stranger

Space & Time - SUAHN (my BIL!)

Oh Theo! - Blood Cultures

Nutmeg - Infected Mushroom

Le Refuge - Beats Antique

Greed - Throwing Snow

The Fixer - Still Corners

Tagging: @machiavelien, @i-lovethatforme, @coykoii, @awakening5, @over-the-sun, @pepperminttegan, @jamezbot, @whiffingbooks, and anyone else who wants to participate (feel free to PM if you want to be added to the tag list)!

[adenei]

9?

Hi anon! Thanks for the ask

9. Tag 3 fic writers you think are underrated/unknown in the fandom/fanfiction community.

This is a tough one! I think I’d have to go with:

@cheesyficwriter she’s new on the scene but her drabbles are top notch and she’s been churning out lots of great multichaps on Ao3 too! Check her out

@warriorlid14 I know you don’t write that often (or maybe my feed doesn’t show enough of your stuff, which would be sad), but anything I’ve read from you always leaves my heart feeling SO happy! <3 

@jamezbot I really don’t have any words other than, if you need a laugh, check out his stuff!

Send me a writer ask!

[be11atrixthestrange]

??? How/Where are you getting an AI that writes fanfic???

LOL @jamezbot created it, and it has spurred some very problematic content. :))

[brightlybound]

@jamezbot