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kimabutch · 5 years ago

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JLCR: kimabutch edition

To celebrate somehow reaching 1000 songs on Jam Like Critical Role, the giant fan-created playlist that I’ve been curating since February, I’ve decided to put together a mini-playlist of own, featuring two of my favourite songs for each member of Vox Machina and The Mighty Nein! Each song has a YouTube link, but you can find the whole mini-playlist on Spotify here.

By mini-playlist I meant that there are “only” 36 songs, and also that I’ve pulled out my favourite lines and explained why I associate the song with them, so that this whole thing is approximately 5400 words long. I tried to restrain myself, but, well, Jam Like Critical Role is a testament to my lack of self-restraint. If it helps, I’ve tried to incorporate a diversity of artists, eras, and genres, from folk-punk to techno, country, dream-pop, classical, and beyond. I hope you find something you enjoy.

Grog

We’re Going To Be Friends, Jack Johnson (cover of White Stripes), for Grog and Pike’s incredibly wholesome childhood friendship. While many of the lyrics describe friends at school, which is not totally accurate for them, I can just imagine the two weirdos playing among the bugs:

“Walk with me, Suzy Lee/ Through the park and by the tree/ We can rest upon the ground/ And look at all the bugs we’ve found”

Not to mention Pike teaching Grog his ABCs:

“Tonight I’ll dream while in my bed/ While silly thoughts run through my head/ Of the bugs and alphabet”

I just love these two silly monstahs.

Giant, Juno Reactor: to balance out that last song, have some techno that makes me want to yell “Vox Machina, Fuck. Shit. UP!” and split Kevdak in half with a nat 20 from the sky. Appropriately named for our goliath friend, this song always temporarily convinces me that I, too, am a seven foot tall barbarian (which is not recommended while you are trying to do anything that requires brainpower.)

Keyleth

I Lost Myself, Lauren Mann and The Fairly Odd Folk, for Keyleth’s self-doubt about whether she can do her Aramente (or whether she even wants to) and fear that she’s hurting everyone:

“I’ve got voices in my head Making me think that this is where I end Hey, what do you see, if anything What do you see in me”

This specifically reminds me of her Aramente, and how it taught her so much more than she was expecting:

“You and me we made a plan To travel from here to there and back again Somewhere on that weathered road I found the dreams that I’d been looking for”

And “Hey, we’ve got the world to see/ So let’s forget our anxieties and get on our way” makes me think of Keyleth and Percy’s friendship, and how both of their stories are about trying to figure out what to do once you’ve achieved your goals. I want to think that after the story ended, they were still occasionally able to leave behind their responsibilities and travel the world together.

Take Us Back, Alela Diane, for a post-canon Keyleth, reminiscing on the old days and eventually outliving the rest of Vox Machina. I get a strong image of Kiki coming down from Zephra to see her friends:

“Atop the crags and cliffs the air is thin/ So we’ll find a mountain path on down the hill/ Meet me where the snowmelt flows/ It is there, my dear, where we’ll begin again”

And of her listening to Scanlan’s music, centuries later; they’d be the last two alive: “I’ve a friend who lives out by the river’s mouth/ He knows the fiddle’s cry is an old sound”

And then Keyleth, alone, listening to a river’s gurgle or the wind’s howling, and almost thinking she hears her friends: “Muted voices, just beyond/ The silent surface of what has gone.”

Percival

The Devil Spoke Here, Chicken Little, which I think is actually about the aftermath of a protest, but which I feel works eerily well for Percy’s development following the Briarwood arc. The beginning reminds me of his guilt, feelings of brokenness, and anger issues after he’s cast out Orthax — right down to his guilt about guns:

“There’s bullets in the streets/ and broken dishes on the floor/ enough anger in my heart/ to take the blame for it all/ I could take every bullet back/ if I could never feel like that”

It also covers Percy’s realization, after his conversation with the Raven Queen, that he’s free from the judgment of the gods, and acceptance that he’s the one who has bad thoughts for the greater good:

“I have no god for guidance/ still I’m praying all the same/ may everything I do/ be done for everybody’s gain”

And then this, for a reason that I can’t quite explain, feels so much like Percy’s forgiveness of Ripley at Glintshore, and his death at her hand:

“May we always fail/ with the best of intentions/ with our hearts always pure/ and our souls only human”

Wandering Star, Portishead: the weird trip hop vibe to this song somehow feels appropriate to Percy, and in particular to his darkest thoughts. The song addresses the possible punishments for these thoughts: “Wandering stars, for whom it is reserved/ The blackness, the darkness, forever.” It helps that this is an allusion to a Bible passage about atheists.

The second verse makes me think both of Percy’s relationship to the concept of eternity (because of the “needle’s eye” — a parable about the entrance of heaven for the rich) and his raven mask:

“Those who have seen the needle’s eye, now tread Like a husk, from which all that was, now has fled And the masks that the monsters wear To feed, upon their prey”

Additionally, “Doubled up inside/ Take a while to shed my grief” is reminiscent of Percy’s revelation, in the last episode, that he just really fucking misses his family. This whole time, something inside of him has been curled up into a little ball like the teenager he was five years ago, grieving his family.

Pike

Holy, Jamily Woods: a song about self-love and self-assurance, underscored by Christian imagery:

“Though I walk through the darkest valley I will fear no love/ Oh my smile my mind reassure me I don’t need no one […] Woke up this morning with my mind set on loving me”

Many of the lyrics can be interpreted either as the singer being self-sufficient because her god is there — or being sufficient even beyond her god: “I’m not lonely, I’m alone/ And I’m holy by my own.”

I think both interpretations work for Pike: that she has found (or is attempting to find) peace when she’s not with her friends, or that although she worships Sarenrae, the Everlight doesn’t necessarily interfere in her day-to-day life and she makes her own happiness. Either way, the song makes me feel at peace in the same way that Pike does.

The Otherside, Ohbijou, for Pike’s feelings about Scanlan during the year gap. Particularly, I’m reminded of Pike’s attempts to talk to Scanlan on the earring: “With things left unsaid so unsatisfied/ And a burning to hear your voice just one more time.”

And in these lyrics:

“And it’s so silly for me to worry/ About situations that don’t exist/ We create these problems and try to solve them/ Why waste each passing moment?”

I hear Pike trying to figure out her feelings for Scanlan, but shooting herself down because he’s gone, why even try?

Scanlan

The Pilgrim - Chapter 33, Willie Nelson (cover of Kris Kristofferson), which really encapsulates, for me, Scanlan’s complex relationship with religion: the fact that a guy who regularly produces lightning from his dick, messes with people’s memories, and actively attempts to cultivate a drug habit finds himself praying to the Everlight at night and eventually becomes Ioun’s chosen:

“He’s a poet, he’s a picker/ He’s a prophet, he’s a pusher/ He’s a pilgrim and a preacher/ And a problem when he’s stoned”

The lines “He’s a walking contradiction/ Partly truth and partly fiction” reminds me of all the identities he’s taken on, both for fun and to shield his emotions from his friends, whereas “Taking every wrong direction on his lonely way back home” makes me think of Scanlan’s long road back to Vox Machina after leaving them.

Handle With Care, Traveling Wilburys: almost every single song on this album works for Scanlan, so choosing just one was a real challenge. But this song is so good for all the shit that Scanlan’s been through (and all the shit that he’s been), and his relationship with Pike through all of that:

“Been beat up and battered around/ Been sent up, and I’ve been shot down/ You’re the best thing that I’ve ever found/ Handle me with care […]”

“Everybody’s got somebody to lean on” reminds me of Scanlan’s feeling, in episode 85, that he’s the odd one out in Vox Machina.

The last verse encapsulates Scanlan acknowledging his own fuck ups, working to make them right, and eventually, having a healthy relationship with Pike:

“I’ve been uptight and made a mess/ But I’ll clean it up myself, I guess/ Oh, the sweet smell of success”

Taryon

Father and Son, Cat Stevens, for Tary’s relationship with his father and his decision to leave home; the song is a duet of sorts. I think the father’s part of the song is a little generous for Howaardt Darrington, but retains the message of (somewhat condescendingly) trying to keep his son at home and have him reconsider his far-reaching plans: “I know that it’s not easy to be calm/ When you’ve found something going on.”

The son’s part, though, captures Tary’s frustration with his father’s strictness and inability to actually understand his passions:

“How can I try to explain?/ ‘Cause when I do he turns away again/ It’s always been the same, same old story/ From the moment I could talk/ I was ordered to listen/ Now there’s a way and I know/ That I have to go away”

And the last verse is some real closeted gay feelings that always make me tear up:

“All the times that I cried/ Keeping all the things I knew inside/ It’s hard, but it’s harder to ignore it”

What’s It Gonna Be, Shura, not so much for the song’s lyrics, but for its music video, which is all about falling for a different gender than you expected, and which is incredibly sweet and beautiful.

That being said, you could definitely take the lyrics to be about his crush on Percy and his obliviousness about who in Vox Machina is sleeping with whom:

“Do I tell you I love you or not?/ 'Cause I can’t really guess what you want/ If you let me down, let me down slow”

Vax’ildan

Glorious, Muse, for Vax’s early relationship with faith. He can’t help but feel drawn towards Sarenrae’s light, even as he has doubts and perhaps even anger towards the gods:

Faith: It drives me away/ But it turns me on/ Like a stranger’s love It rockets through the universe It fuels the lies and feeds the curse And we, too, could be glorious”

He wants that glory that he sees in Pike, but he doesn’t know how to approach it or reconcile it with his life experiences. And then he finds his whole world shattered as he’s chosen by the Raven Queen, and he once again has to find faith, though in a way that he never expected:

“I need to believe But I still want more With the cuts and the bruises”

Fields of Gold, Sting: a song from Vax to Keyleth. I can imagine them so perfectly in this scene, perhaps during their year of downtime, with the winds of Zephra blowing through the fields and their hope beyond hope that they’ll be able to stay together:

“Will you stay with me? Will you be my love?/ Upon the fields of barley/ We’ll forget the sun in his jealous sky/ As we lie in fields of gold”

“See the west wind move like a lover so/ Upon the fields of barley/ Feel her body rise when you kiss her mouth/ Among the fields of gold”

Years later, Vax knows that Keyleth will see those fields again and think of him: “You’ll remember me when the west wind moves/ Upon the fields of barley.”

Vex’ahlia

Half Jack, The Dresden Dolls: a truly haunting song about the pain and unavoidability of being her father’s daughter — she’s always half Jill (her mother) and half Jack (her father.) The whole song is incredibly painful for Vex, and the lines:

“It might destroy me But I’d sacrifice my body If it meant I’d get the Jack part out”

always makes me think of “If I could pull the blood of you from my veins and give it back, I would.” Also,

“But if you listen/ You’ll learn to hear the difference/ Between the halfs and the half nots”

reminds me of her asking Percy if she looks like she comes from money — or a younger Vex, in Syngorn, gradually realizing why everyone looked down on her and Vax. Lastly, isn’t “I see my mother in my face/ But only when I travel” absolutely heartbreaking for her?

Fall Down or Fly, Lindi Ortega, only partly because Lindi Ortega strongly resembles my headcanon for Vex. The other part is because of my abiding love for how Vex learned to fly, and how that worked with her character arc: from the first time, in the Briarwoods arc, that she discovered her love for flying, to her flaunting convention and stealing the broom, to Percy modifying it for her, to her friends cheering her on with chicken target practice, and finally to her soaring through the skies with confidence. And the song captures that so well for me, as well as her decision to keep going even when her father, Saundor’s words, and her own self-doubt bring her down:

“This is your life/ You can fall down or fly/ You can burn out a shot if you want/ This is your life/ You can live it or die/ You can quit now or try if you want/ But don’t you give up, don’t you give up”

This also reminds me of how much all of Vox Machina adores and supports Vex (and I will join them in crying about how awesome she is):

“You said what is there to lose?/ Do it if you choose/ I got faith in you/ Everything you do/ I know you are gonna make it to the top”

(I also maintain that a modern Vex would be really into country music, particularly the genre of country song in which women tell people to fuck off.)

Vox Machina

Call Them Brothers, Regina Spektor feat. Only Son, for Scanlan’s departure from Vox Machina and the whole team’s attempts to deal with it. I first heard this song in an absolutely heartbreaking TAZ animatic, and my pain increased exponentially when I realized how much it also worked for Critical Role. It’s perfect, in my opinion, for the sense that their family, which has seen them through so much, is irreparably broken — “That’s it, it’s split, it won’t recover/ Just frame the halves and call them brothers.”

But then you also get “Over and over, they call us their friends/ Can’t we find something else to pretend?” for Scanlan’s insistence that Vox Machina doesn’t really care about him, and “Find your fathers and your mothers/ If you remember who they are” for “what’s my mother’s name?”

Maybe this should go on Scanlan’s playlist, but I think “The hunt is on, everyone’s chasing a shot” also works for the way that the rest of Vox Machina independently searched for Scanlan during their year of downtime… and the feelings of defeat in the song just feel appropriate to the whole group.

(I actually have a playlist full of songs for episode 85, because I enjoy making myself sad; it took a lot of effort not to put them all here.)

Freaks, The Hawk in Paris: I can never decide whether this is a Mighty Nein or Vox Machina song, but I’m putting it here mostly because “If you come along with us, the doors are never ending” is absolutely hilarious in for Vox Machina’s single greatest enemy.

That, and there are a lot of lines that work for individual members of the group: “We have a flair for the shade and the inbetween” (Vax); “We like to run with the wolves from the darker scene” (Keyleth); “When we turn the safety off, the shots are automatic” (Percy); “All our friends tell their friends we’re so dramatic” (Scanlan); and “We’ll make you swoon, make it hurt just a little” (Vex).

Additionally, “We have a plan, we’ve got the means for your liberation/ You’ll only have to blur the lines on a few occasions” makes me think of the Briarwood arc, and I makes me think of Percy dramatically revealing his identity to the priest — and cut to Grog pulling out a guy’s tongue.

Anyways, if I learn to make AMVs by the time that the animated series is released, this will be the first that I’ll make.

Beauregard

Saint Simon, The Shins, for Beau’s escape from the Cobalt Soul. The song expresses frustration at weighty intellectualism and how much it doesn’t teach you — which i think is something Beau felt strongly with her monk teachers:

“After all these implements and texts designed by intellects/ So vexed to find, evidently there’s still so much that hides […] Since I don’t have time nor mind to figure out the nursery rhymes/ That helped us out in making sense of our lives”

So she tries not to care about anything because it’s safer that way (“The cruel, uneventful state of apathy releases me”), and she runs away:

“I’ll try hard not to give in, batten down to fare the wind/ Rid my head of this pretence, allow myself no mock defence/ Step into the night”

I think the last part of the song could also work for her meeting the Mighty Nein and starts understanding friendship and love: “Mercy’s eyes are blue when she places them in front of you/ Nothing really holds a candle to the solemn warmth you feel inside you.”

Jonas and Ezekiel, Indigo Girls, because what kind of lesbian would I be if I didn’t put at least one gay-written song on Beau’s playlist? This one is about road trips, wandering, and looking for a purpose:

“I left my anger in a river running Highway 5 New Hampshire, Vermont, bordered by College farms, hubcaps, and falling rocks Voices in the woods and the mountaintops”

But also contains one verse that I think fits her strict family, her new family in the Mighty Nein, and the “devils” — or tieflings — of which her family would certainly not approve:

“Now when I was young my people taught me well/ Give back what you take or you’ll go to hell/ It’s not the devil’s land, you know it’s not that kind/ Every devil I meet becomes a friend of mine/ Every devil I meet is an angel in disguise”

And something about this reminds me of her journey into Xhorhas and attempts to uncover conspiracies and work out the truth: “In the war over land where the world began/ Prophecies say it’s where the world will end.”

Caduceus

Born at the Right Time, Paul Simon, for Caduceus’s belief in destiny and his place therein. The chorus describes his occasional naïveté, and the happiness of his life in the Blooming Grove, with his family:

“Never been lonely Never been lied to Never had to scuffle in fear Nothing denied to”

And then gets into his conviction that his goddess and the world itself put him where he is:

“Born at the instant/ The church bells chime/ And the whole world whispering/ Born at the right time”

The very chill vibe of the song is also very Clay, to me.

Happy All the Time, Danny Schmidt: the singer himself has said that he doesn’t know whether or not this song is ironic and/or melancholic, so I’m going to go with a sincere and cheerful interpretation for Caduceus, with maybe a hint of nostalgia for more peaceful days among his family. It’s got some incredibly lush and occasionally strange nature imagery that I think is perfect for him:

“I took the time to breathe cause I was happy all the time/ Among the rootbuds and the weeds cause I was happy all the time/ But the peat moss and the leaves took turns with both my feet/ Until my toes took root and I was happy, I was happy all the time”

I think Caduceus is still happy, but he was definitely at peace as a hermit.

Caleb

I Miss That Feeling, Tennis: a song about panic attacks and how the physical effects, when described, almost seem like falling in love. It works not only for Caleb’s panic attacks, but also, relatedly, his relationship with fire, which scares him, even as he likes the way it feels — “Something like pleasure, you’d never believe it.”

The fiery way that the singer describes panic attacks is also very Caleb:

“I miss that feeling/ Flicker hot and hovering/ Like my own discovering/ Eagerly, tenderly/ I miss that feeling/ Flicker spread into an itch/ Into a burn, into a twitch/ Slow and even”

It brings me back to the first time we saw it, in the gnoll mines. Also, “Every little thing starts trembling/ Recorded by the needle of an EKG” feels very reminiscent of his hospitalization, though from a modern perspective.

Putting the Dog to Sleep, The Antlers, for Caleb’s very tentative trust in the Mighty Nein, and in particular his friendship with Beau. I think this song really encapsulates Caleb’s pain and skittishness, especially near the beginning of their campaign, as well as his desperation (unknown even to himself) to love again:

“Well, prove to me I’m not gonna die alone/ Unstitch that shit I’ve sewn/ To close up the hole that tore through my skin/ Well my trust in you is a dog with a broken leg/ Tendons too torn to beg for you to let me back in”

And this feels like something that Beau would say to Caleb — upfront and caring all at the same time, reminding him that his actions affect everyone else and asking him not to run:

“You said, ‘I can’t prove to you you’re not gonna die alone/ But trust me to take you home/ To clean up that blood all over your paws/ You can’t keep running out […] Kicking yourself in the head/ Because you’re kicking me too.’”

By the end of the song, Caleb is starting to believe her, and even asking her to trust him: “Put your trust in me/ I’m not gonna die alone… I don’t think so…”

Fjord

Release the Kraken, The Daysleepers: I added this to Fjord’s playlist back when everyone was speculating that his patron was something kraken-like, and even now that this is clearly not the case, I think it still works for Uk’otoa (Uk’otoa) and his attempts at freedom: “It pulled the ships down/ It’s rising from the deep below.”

But also for Fjord’s relationship with Avantika — for his attempts to get close to her in order to save himself and his friends:

“Turn the lights down Careful as a serpent’s tongue Move without a sound Gentle as the cold wind moans”

I think “When you sold love/ Your heart becomes a monster” is some of what Fjord felt after those encounters: like he gave part of himself away.

21st Century Child, Daggy Man, for Fjord’s self-hatred and the masks he puts on. Many of the lyrics could fit several characters (particularly Beau, Caleb, and Scanlan), but

“I hate the sound of myself/ When I’m being honest/ Sounds like somebody else/ And I don’t wanna listen/ To the whinings of a 21st century child”

just perfectly captures his feelings about his voice and his past self — weak and whiny, and not who he wants to be. And then we get these lines, which feel like a good summary of his issues with identity and deception:

“And I’ve struggled with how/ Others perceive me/ And I can’t tell if I’m better/ Or just better at deceiving And I’ll keep going until I’m called out”

Jester

The Sweetest Sounds, Ella Fitzgerald (cover of Richard Rodgers), for pre-stream Jester barely waiting for her exciting life to begin. I first heard this song in Rodger & Hammerstein’s Cinderella, and while there is something fairy-tale-like about Jester, I think this upbeat, jazzy cover fits her well:

“The most entrancing sight of all Is yet for me to see And the dearest love in all the world Is waiting somewhere for me”

I can just imagine a 10-year-old Jester listening to the band at the Lavish Chateau play this song, dressing up in Marion’s clothes, and pretending she’s in a storybook romance.

One Hand in my Pocket, Alanis Morissette, which really captures her beautiful complexity:

“I’m free, but I’m focused/ I’m green, but I’m wise/ I’m hard, but I’m friendly/ I’m sad, but I’m laughing”

because Jester is so many things all at once, and none of them negate each other. It’s so hopeful (“What it all comes down to/ Is that everything’s gonna be quite alright”) and comforting (“What it all boils down to/ Is that no one’s really got it figured out just yet”) in a way that really reminds me of my favourite blue cleric.

The whole song has such a fun, free, summer vibe that always makes me smile — just like Jester.

Mollymauk

Carnival Overture, Antonín Dvořák (Leonard Bernstein & New York Philharmonic Orchestra): one of my favourite pieces of classical music ever — when I hear it, an entire music video about a carnival plays in my head. The exuberant theme that bowls you over from the start reminds me of Molly’s effervescent, ostentatious personality.

The slower and quieter part in the middle with the violin and woodwind solos gives me a picture of Molly and Yasha sitting alone in the evenings just outside the carnival encampment, cuddled together — Yasha talking about her wife, Molly telling jokes, and the both of them making up names for constellations and flowers. Then the quick-paced minor section makes me think of the bloodhunter tiefling in combat, deadly with his swords and vicious mockery — before the return to the joyful, triumphant original theme.

Wonderful Everyday, Chance the Rapper & The Social Experiment**: this is sort of a cover of the Arthur theme song, but in the absolute best way possible. The meandering, loose, and extraordinarily happy vocals always remind me of Molly’s way of living.

Although some of the lyrics are more optimistic than Molly (I think he’d laugh at “Everybody that you meet/ Has an original point of view” and say that their points of view are usually bullshit), the message of appreciating every single day is just wonderful for him.

And the last bit hits me like a ton of bricks:

“And when I go down/ I'ma go down swinging/ My eyes still smiling/ And my heart still singing”

“Eyes never shut,” indeed.

**not on Spotify, sorry!

Nott

The Sore Feet Song, Ally Kerr: at first it appears to be a simple song about traveling long distances to find your love, which certainly describes Nott’s search for Yeza: “I walked ten thousand miles, ten thousand miles to see you/ And every gasp of breath I grabbed at just to find you.”

But the second verse is where it really gets into Nott’s thieving, rat-eating, badass ways:

“I stole ten thousand pounds, ten thousand pounds to see you I robbed convenient stores cause I thought they’d make it easier I lived off rats and toads, and I starved for you I fought off giants bears and I killed them too”

I love this strange little goblin.

Fox in the Snow, Belle & Sebastian: this song has always been a bit of a mystery to me, but the lyrics remind me of Nott’s intense vulnerability after she was transformed into a goblin — and in particular her self-image as something animalistic:

“Fox in the snow, where do you go/ To find something you could eat?/ Because the word out on the street is you are starving/ Don’t let yourself grow hungry now/ Don’t let yourself grow cold”

The second verse, which switches to describing a human girl, reminds me of pre-transformation Veth, more acceptable in body but no less socially ostracized than Nott:

“Girl in the snow, where do you go/ To find someone that will do?/ To tell someone all the truth before it kills you/ Listen to your crazy laugh/ Before you hang a right/ And disappear from sight/ What do they know anyway?”

I can just see that exact scene play out with a young Veth, right down to the “crazy laugh.” I’m glad she found Yeza, but she must still have been pretty lonely without any other friends.

Yasha

Into the Barrens, Grizfolk, for Yasha’s years of blank wandering after Zuala’s death. This song fits Yasha so well that for months, I somehow tricked myself into believing that Ashley had put it on her playlist. But I feel like this encapsulates her hopeless feelings, away from all society, not living for anything or anyone:

“Cast me away, my shadow’s cold/ Into the barrens where I will grow old/ Well, I’m not looking for answers/ And I’m not looking for gold”

And I can see this verse for the beginning of her relationship with the Stormlord, following voices she can’t understand as she wanders, barely alive:

“The voices in my head/ They echo in the wind and I begin to sway/ I follow what they say/ I can’t see their eyes, but I hear howling through the haze”

Dreams, Fleetwood Mac: technically a break-up song, but I can’t help but think of Yasha’s ever-present guilt and her memories of Zuala when I hear:

“Listen carefully to the sound of your loneliness/ Like a heartbeat drives you mad/ In the stillness of remembering what you had/ And what you lost”

The storm imagery also works for Yasha — “When the rain washes you clean, you’ll know” makes me think of her fight with the Stormlord on the boat, which allowed her to open up to her friends. And it touches on Yasha’s opaque dreams (“Now here I go again, I see the crystal visions/ I keep my visions to myself”).

(Ally and Stevie also have a lesbian mash-up of Dreams and Rhiannon, two of the gayest Fleetwood Mac songs, that I associate strongly with Beauyasha.)

Mighty Nein

Old Black Train, The Blasting Company (from Over the Garden Wall): trains don’t exist in Exandria (yet! — Percy or Taryon should get on that) but this is more of a metaphor for life. It reminds me of the Mighty Nein setting out from Alfield, not knowing the twists and turns they were going to face, the places they’d go, nor the family they’d become:

“This journey is a long one/ It will take you all around/ Life rushing by your window/ Before it lays you down”

Then there’s this verse:

“Oh come on now young stranger/ Weren’t you someone’s son? How’d you find this depot 'Cause it ain’t where you belong”

which feels very appropriate for many members of the Mighty Nein, separated as they are from their families and wandering in lands that aren’t welcoming to them. There’s also a verse that’s reminiscent of the graveyard they passed on the way to Zadash, which more and more feels like a portent of things to come:

“You will pass a graveyard/ Stones worn by the years/ The train’ll stop a minute but don’t let it leave you here”

Sailing, Leisure Cruise: another song about transportation, although this one is a little less metaphorical. As you can probably guess, I associate it with their adventures on the Mystake and the Ball Eater, which begun by total accident but which, in my opinion, was a turning point for the group, and ultimately helped them grow closer together:

“And to our surprise we’re sailing The high seas in the middle of the ocean […] We’re sailing the wildest mystery And to our surprise we’re happy and free”

Okay, so maybe “happy and free” is a bit of an exaggeration for that arc (particularly for poor Nott) but I think there were a lot of moments in which the Mighty Nein learned unexpected lessons about themselves.

And I think this is a good summary of the Mighty Nein’s modus operandi: seize every passing opportunity, because you don’t know what tomorrow will bring:

“Maybe it’s today Maybe it’s tomorrow But we have to make a play Or the chance will fade away”

And that’s a wrap! Thanks for listening and reading. Love you all <3

#critical role #Cr music #my stuff

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newagesispage · 5 years ago

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JANUARY 2020

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Lots of nominations are out. I do have some faves: The Grammy’s went crazy for Lizzo and Billie Eilish. The comedy recording noms went to Trevor Noah, Ellen, Aziz, Gaffigan and Dave Chappelle.**The Sag’s gave love to Leo and Brad for Once Upon a Time… In Hollywood, Of course, Joaquin was nominated for Joker. Most noms went to JJ Rabbit, The Irishman and Bombshell. In TV there was much ado about The Morning Show, The Crown, Barry, Big Little Lies, Game of Thrones, Stranger Things, The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel and Schitt’s Creek.** The Golden Globes which will air on Jan. 5 were full of great choices. Fingers crossed for Joaquin Phoenix and Todd Phillips for Joker, Once Upon a Time… In Hollywood and Quentin and Brad and Leo, Knives Out, Kathy Bates, Jodie Comer, Olivia Coleman, Billy Porter, Bill Hader and Henry Winkler and Barry. I hope good things for The Crown, Succession, Patricia Arquette, Helena Bonham Carter, Brian Cox and Kieran Culkin. Ellen DeGeneres will get the Carol Burnett award and Tom Hanks will receive the Cecil B. DeMille award.

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And Hooray to Schitt’s Creek for their PSA at the end of an episode that was about a character coming out to his parents. The promo gave resources to turn to for help.**The crew met up recently at the Paley Fest after the end of the series.

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Finally.. The Pope has abolished pontifical secrecy. It’s 2020 and the church may finally stop protecting predators. The age of consent for their porn was raised from 14 to 18 to keep up with modern times.

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Days of our Lives has been renewed for another year. We are safe until September 2021.**I am really hating Kate right now. I wish Rolf would take them all down. I am quite thru with the ‘acting’ of pushing buttons on phones and computers which leads us to read their messages on the screen. I do not like it in real life and I don’t want to watch it. Boring!!

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The Patriot act has been reauthorized.

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Sara Gilbert has separated from wife Linda Perry.

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Sharon Stone was blocked on Bumble because users thought it wasn’t really her, it was and her account was restored.

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The new film, Linda Ronstadt: the sound of my voice shows just how far her reach has been.

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Kudos to Eddie Murphy and company for the fab ‘Dolemite is my name.’

*****

I saw that the Bachelor is back. Is that horrid show still on?

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Steve Bullock is out.** Kamala Harris is out. Scary Clown tweeted: Too bad. We’ll miss you Kamala. She tweeted back: Don’t worry Mr. President, I’ll see you at your trial.** Biden is on the No Malarkey tour.

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Willie Nelson has reportedly quit smoking weed.

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Word is that Trump wears Switzerland’s Bronx face makeup for that orange glow.** Have you seen Rand Paul lately. He seems to have taken on a similar look to his President with the big white puffy eyes and that deranged look. What is going on with these people?

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Woody Harrelson and Justin Theroux will star in a series about Watergate from the Veep team.

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Billy Dee Williams tells us that he identifies as male and female.

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About 1 million kids are getting thrown off lunch subsidies and other programs.** A recent Rolling Stone article explains the evangelical support of Trump. An early campaign meeting with religious leaders promised to fuck with the rights of transgender folks, abortion rights and to leave climate change alone because of the belief that God will control that. So, with that thinking should we shut down the factories because those are man made? Should we all be Christian scientists and not practice medicine anymore? Word is that the big money donors for Trump are helping to prop up their institutions and charities. **Christianity Today magazine : Trump should be removed from office. To the many evangelicals who continue to support Mr. Trump in spite of his blackened moral record, remember who you are and whom you serve. ** On Dec. 8, the President tweeted 108 times. So much time on his hands!

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Michael Moore has a new grass roots podcast called Rumble. He will discuss and digest the breaking political news of the day and suggest things that the rest of us can do. He is introducing the Emergency podcast system.

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The last democratic debates of the year were here and again there was not enough time for Andrew Yang. He did well when he got the time and got to promote his book without that sounding too bad after he was asked whet gift he might give another candidate. Warren made a sound bite with her “wine cave” crack which just made her look petty. Biden and Bernie sounded the same as always. Amy Klobuchar had the best night. She was not shaky and seemed so confident. Trevor Noah seemed thrilled that he was mentioned. The sound on the microphones was a bit prickly.

*****

I really hate advertising for the most part and try to avoid them if at all possible. But it seems these Peyton/ Brad ads are everywhere and they are the most annoying things I have ever seen. Please make them go away.

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Hooray for Kansas City for being the first major city in the country to offer free public transportation.

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The Giuliani’s are divorced.

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Ok.. I’ll hand it to Dolly Parton. She has been putting her story songs on the screen in Heartstrings. They are a little “Hallmarky” so they wouldn’t really be my thing but it’s Dolly so sure I’ll give it a go. They celebrate all kinds of love which is a beautiful thing . One story had a beautiful performance b Gerald McRaney.

*****

Love intentionally, extravagantly, unconditionally, the broken world waits in darkness for the light that is you. –L.R. Knost

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I was so hoping that Greta Thunberg would be the person of the year for Time. Hooray!!

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Rep. Van Drew is switching from the democrats to the republicans. Um..ok.. what timing.

*****

Check out Jack’s grandson, Duke Nicholson. He is all the buzz!

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The President was impeached on Dec 18. There were plenty of objections and rants from the republicans like they were children. The idiocy that comes out of their mouths is astonishing. Doug Collins, Deb Lasko and Louie Gohmert just seem insane. I don’t understand why there was not more push back when they kept up their mantra about nothing in the Mueller report when we can all see that there was. We are not all stupid. In the end some sort of consequence was finally brought to the man who has been accused of so much in his life. In formal impeachment proceedings there is no executive privilege. Pelosi is mulling over when to send the case to the senate. It is probably a good idea to let POTUS stew over the holidays.

*****

If impeachment would overturn the will of 63 million voters and that’s unconstitutional, then what is the electoral college overturning the will of 65 million voters. –Adam Parkhomenko

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Trump fans were upset when Canada broadcast Home Alone 2 with their President cut out. They called it political but it was found that it had been cut for ad time long before his campaign even began.

R.I.P. Irving Burgie, Williams Rucklehouse, victims of the multiple military shooting, Ron Leibman, Marie Fredriksson, the Jersey City , Portland and New Zealand victims, Don Imus, victims of the Vegas fires, Jerry Herman, Alley Willis, Carol Spinney, Danny Aiello, Syd Mead and Neil Innes.

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doomedandstoned · 6 years ago

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Gandalf The Green Returns with ‘A Billion Faces’

~Doomed & Stoned Debuts~

Hailing from Leeds, England, this is GANDALF THE GREEN. The stoner-doom trio is one of a handful of younger bands comprised of members in their late-teens and early-twenties that have been impressing us lately, joining company with Montana's Wizzerd, Toronto's Horse Lung, Portland's SAOLA and Ape Cave, as well as Witchers Creed from Sweden.

Something interesting I've observed about what I'll dub the Dopesmoker generation is their affinity for large-scale compositions. Horse Lung shot for Bach-like complexity with their fugal composition Rattenkönig and have just released a pair of tracks clocking in at 18 and 28 minutes respectively on 'ἔσχατον' (2019). Likewise, Ape Cave released the massive double album, 'Language of the Earth' (2018), with Sleep producer Billy Anderson, who actually invited these kids to come in and record it after hearing their 2016 album Pillars of Evolution.

With Gandalf The Green's latest single, we find them similarly thinking on a grand scale. The near fourteen-minute epic "A Billion Faces" is the foretaste of the glory to come, as the band readies to release their full-length via APF Records this fall. Staged in three interlocking segments, the track is a real trip and holds up well to repeated listens. Execution-wise, Andrew Flint (guitar, vox), Jack Walker (drums, vox), and Danny Wrigley (bass guitar) have never sounded tighter as a unit. Compositionally, the fuzz-trippers show they can achieve balance and depth within a big-picture framework, without betraying flow or nuance. Fans of Slomatics and Conan will surely find this a joy to listen to from start to finish.

I think the band describes it best: "A 13-minute psych-infused stoner doom filth fest. All the tone. All the distortion. Titanic-sized knuckle-dragging gnarly riffs amped into pure oblivion through a Matamp rig of doom. We are excited for you to hear it." Look for "A Billion Faces" out Thursday, March 28th, as a digital download via APF Records, with artwork by Dominic Sohor Design.

Give ear...

An Interview with

Gandalf The Green

For those new to Gandalf The Green, tell us about how you formed and your history.

It started with Andy writing a bedroom demo for 'The Right' in 2015, we'd previously been in a deathcore band together (we know, we were 16, cut us some slack) and knew we all liked slow and heavy music, so got in touch and we started rehearsing with ghetto equipment in Andy's bedroom in Huddersfield. The name came from a friend who'd just bought a Gandalf style pipe and we found the pun hilarious for a Stoner Doom band, so we used it. We released our Debut EP 'King of the Ashes' in September 2016 as a 4-piece band with two guitarists, though soon after we split with our drummer and put Jack behind the kit as a trio. After that things began moving properly. Since then, we've been gigging more, collecting more equipment, and worsening our tinnitus by turning up louder. In the last year or so we've finally started getting proper slots on festivals and local gigs, though we're still yet to play a headline show!

What music has influenced your sound, and who are your musical heroes?

Our philosophy is that we want to play stupidly low-tuned, crushingly heavy music, but not in a way that sounds too evil or miserable, then combine that with trippy, ambient cleans for a huge dynamic change. Someone once put it eloquently as 'The brutality of Mordor with the serenity of the Shire.'

From a writing perspective, our main influences are Conan, Sleep, YOB and Elephant Tree. Though with all the spacey ambient bits it's quite difficult to pin exactly where a lot of that comes from, mainly just going a bit nuts with effects and seeing what comes out.

AF: My musical idol is forever Dave Grohl, even if this band doesn't sound much like his stuff. My favourite guitar players are the ones for the bands listed, plus Tony Iommi, of course.

JW: We all listen to very varied stuff, so there’s all sorts, but for this genre my influences are, Yob, The Body, Elephant Tree, Khanate, Om, Weedeater, Windhand, BongCauldron. Musical heroes? Fenriz, Willie Nelson, Hank Williams III, Mike Scheidt.

DW: My influences change around a lot but probably The Body, Sleep, Conan, Thou and Full of Hell. As for heroes the first that comes to mind is Jordan Dreyer.

What’s been your favourite gig to play so far?

AF: I'd say Gizzardfest 2018 as it was our largest crowd, but one of my amps blew up during sound check so I was a bit miffed. Other than that, the Holy Spider Promotions show Terence Larkin booked at the Mulberry Tavern in Sheffield last year was brilliant. A tiny, sweaty venue crammed with people who were really digging the music.

JW: Yeah Gizzardfest was really cool, but for me I'd say that Sheffield gig, it was Mulberry Tavern with Khost, Oak, Ritual King, Regulus and Stonelung. When we went onstage the venue was rammed so the atmosphere was great for us, it WAS proper sweaty but that's the best way.

DW: Got to agree with Gizzardfest I was amazed by the amount of people there and the reception we got cancelled out the problems by a long shot for me.

King of the Ashes by Gandalf the Green

How do you look back on your 'King of the Ashes' EP two and a half years on?

We recorded it for £0 in Andy's bedroom with whatever mics we had on hand and did the drums with some University students. Other than 'The One Ring', it's not very representative of our sound these days though, as we were finding our feet and trying lots of writing styles, with speedier Stoner Rock tracks like 'King of the Ashes' and 'The Right', which we don't really play these days.

It's fun to see how the tracks have evolved for our live performances though, 'The One Ring' now screams with feedback, has reverb swells and washed out cleans, while 'Old Toby' has a massively slowed down outro riff and stereo panning oscillating delay at the beginning. If you enjoy the debut, definitely come check us out live to see how it's evolved.

AF: I'm still pretty happy with it and loved the super DIY bedroom recording. I felt the production quality came out great, given the circumstances. Seeing how I’ve changed my vocal style and tuned my guitar down so much lower makes comparing the new and old material interesting.

JW: I have a lot of fond memories from that time writing and recording, but since we were so new to it all it doesn't quite have as good sound quality as I'd like. It's alright, but we've grown as a band and the stuff we're writing now has a way more unique sound and is better in every way I can think of.

DW: I still listen to it a fair bit honestly. I think it still holds up, but I'm excited to start showing how we've developed over the past few years and how we come across out of a bedroom. What music are you digging right now?

AF: Right now I'm on a massive hype for the gnarliest, darkest stuff I can find, such as Grey Widow, Coltsblood, Ommadon, Bismuth, and Glasghote, and I imagine these bands are going to work into my writing style for our next release.

JW: I listen to a shit load of country, like every day, maybe even more than I listen to metal. Artists like Benjamin Tod, Willie Nelson, Hank Williams III, Jesse Stewart, Crywank, The Native Howl, etcetera. But for this genre the stuff on rotation right now is bands like Windhand, Grime, The Body, Yob, Bell Witch, Ommadon, Bismuth, Sloth Hammer, Primitive Man, Elephant Tree, Goblinsmoker, Tuskar.

DW: I've been binging on grindcore and hardcore recently, a lot of Full of Hell and Wormrot on repeat. Other than that the new Body Void EP has been blowing me away every time I listen.

You’ve recently signed with APF Records. Which bands on the label do you share an affinity with?

AF: The reason we approached APF to begin with is because we love so many bands on the roster, it's hard to pick out a few! Personally, I'd say BongCauldron, Battalions, and Under, though there really isn't a bad band on APF.

JW: BongCauldron, since they were the main influence on me (and I think the others too) when starting this band. They were one of the first bands to help me get into this kind of music, since I found them when Andy's old band supported them in Bad Apples years ago and through that found more doom/stoner bands.

DW: Yes, BongCauldron, for pretty obvious reasons. Also I've been listening to Under- Stop Being Naive a lot since seeing them at Gizzardfest they've got such a unique and crushing sound.

photo by aevjohnston

Tell us about "A Billion Faces" -- what’s it about, and how did the track come together?

AF: It was the first track I wrote after we tuned down to drop F and bought a bunch of new effects, so I was really playing with all the new toys and trying to make something with a big dynamic change from the gentle intro to when it kicks in. We've been performing it live for a while, so the song's evolved over time to include the sexy wah solo and, because Jack and Danny love noise music, we added the noise/screaming section in the outro. The original demo was only 9 minutes compared to the final 13!

We were approached by a friend of a friend (Alex Tune, assisted by Jake Bonnett) who needed a band to record for his University coursework, it seemed mutually beneficial, and we'd get to record in the gorgeous Phipps Hall and borrow a bunch of Huddersfield Uni's Matamp equipment for free to use with ours, so we took him up on it. We live recorded the track in December 2018 and mixed and mastered the track ourselves, so again got away with paying £0 for the release. It sounded lovely in the room, but we really didn't expect the final product to sound quite as good as it did. Lyrically, the track is about parallel universes and how, if they exist, every different possible version of you exists somewhere in a big infinite tree of possible yous, experiencing the best and worst things all at once. I was wondering where I'd be if I'd taken a different turn in life and moved to a different city, and I realised that there'd be a version of me in a parallel universe where I did move there, wondering right now where he'd be if he took the turns I did. We're both thinking about each other amongst a billion different versions of ourselves, but unable to know who the other is and what their life is like.

The song comes with a cracking video. How did that come about?

A friend of the band, and vocalist/guitarist in Andy's other band, Andrew Johnston (he uses the moniker 'AEVJohnston' for music) offered to help. We thought it'd be a crime to not get video footage of us performing in such a beautiful venue, so he came along free of charge, brought his fancy lighting rig, bathed the room in green light, rented a couple of cameras from the University, and filmed us while we recorded. We edited the footage ourselves cut from various different takes we did. Again, we paid nothing for the video because we're cheap (do you see a theme?).

JW: Shout out Johnston for being a sick bloke, nice one mate it turned it really well, thank you. Sadly though, I don't think the video shows just how beautiful that room really was. Like the video is great, don't get me wrong, but actually being stood in that room with that lighting rig made it look gorgeous. Such a great atmosphere for it. Again, cheers Johnston, that was a huge help, I think the video of it really brings this release together.

What’s your plans for the rest of 2019?

We're working on our next release, of which we have over half an hour written already. Andy is busy with University, and the other two of us with real life things. Put simply, in 2019 we want to push to play more gigs and write more music. Hopefully we'll have another release done or out by the end of the year. We're aiming not to fuck about as much for it as we did for this one, because it took a long time to get going.

If your house was on fire and you could grab one thing from it before it burned down, what would that be?

AF: My Green Matamp GT1 amplifier, it's like my child.

JW: My bong, it's like my child.

DW: My cat, it's like my child.

Finally: anything to declare?

JW: Yeah, we just want to say how much we appreciate everything that's happened to us since finishing the single. We love every one of you who's checked us out or gave us a chance. Big shout out and lots of love to Andrew Field for signing us to APF, to every promoter for putting us on and every one of you for listening. It means the world to us, thank you.

AF: We also love all the sound guys who keep telling us to turn down on stage, even if you don’t love us.

☮

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#D&S Debuts #Gandalf The Green #Leeds #England #UK #Doom #Metal #Doom Metal #Stoner Rock #Music Video #APF Records #D&S Interviews #Doomed & Stoned

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bthenoise · 6 years ago

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Congrats To The Grammys For Finally Getting Their Rock & Metal Category Figured Out

Following a pretty up-and-down rollercoaster ride the past few years, the Recording Academy has seemingly gotten their stuff together when it comes to their rock and metal categories.

After dealing with an embarrassing year last year where Avenged Sevenfold publically called out the prestigious institution for their lack of support to the metal community, apparently, someone at the Academy was paying attention as this year’s nominees might be one of their best in quite some time.

For Best Metal Performance, the Grammys see a lot of new faces including Between The Buried And Me, Deafheaven, High On Fire and Trivium as well as scene staples Underoath (Underoath were previously nominated back in 2006 for Best Short Form Music Video).

As for Best Rock Performance, previous nominees like Arctic Monkeys, Cris Cornell (rest in peace) and Halestorm are accompanied by the likes of Greta Van Fleet and, surprisingly and well-deserved, FEVER 333.

Another fantastic nomination comes in the Best Rock Song category. Sandwiched between well-known household names like Ghost, Twenty One Pilots, and St. Vincent is Bring Me The Horizon and, for the second time, Greta Van Fleet.

All in all, as much as we bash on award shows for their lack of support towards our hard rock and metal community, this year the Grammys got it right. Were there other artists that deserved a nomination? Of course there were. But considering how things have been in the past (Leonard Cohen Best Rock Performance 2018, Beyonce Best Rock Performance nominee 2017, Tenacious D Best Metal Performance 2015, etc.), we’ll take it.

To check out the full list of nominees to prepare you for the 61st annual Grammy Awards which will take place on Sunday, February 10th, be sure to look below.

Best Rock Performance

“Four Out Of Five” —Arctic Monkeys “When Bad Does Good” — Chris Cornell “Made An America” — The Fever 333 “Highway Tune” — Greta Van Fleet “Uncomfortable” — Halestorm

Best Metal Performance

“Condemned To The Gallows “— Between The Buried And Me “Honeycomb” — Deafheaven “Electric Messiah” — High On Fire “Betrayer” — Trivium “On My Teeth” — Underoath

Best Rock Song

“Black Smoke Rising” — Jacob Thomas Kiszka, Joshua Michael Kiszka, Samuel Francis Kiszka & Daniel Robert Wagner, songwriters (Greta Van Fleet) “Jumpsuit” — Tyler Joseph, songwriter (Twenty One Pilots) “MANTRA” — Jordan Fish, Matthew Kean, Lee Malia, Matthew Nicholls & Oliver Sykes, songwriters (Bring Me The Horizon) “Masseduction” — Jack Antonoff & Annie Clark, songwriters (St. Vincent) “Rats” — Tom Dalgety & A Ghoul Writer, songwriters (Ghost)

Best Rock Album

Rainier Fog — Alice In Chains M A N I A — Fall Out Boy Prequelle — Ghost From The Fires — Greta Van Fleet Pacific Daydream — Weezer

Record Of The Year

“I Like It” — Cardi B, Bad Bunny & J Balvin “The Joke” — Brandi Carlile “This Is America” — Childish Gambino “God’s Plan” — Drake “Shallow” — Lady Gaga & Bradley Cooper “All The Stars” — Kendrick Lamar & SZA “Rockstar” — Post Malone Featuring 21 Savage “The Middle” — Zedd, Maren Morris & Grey

Album Of The Year

Invasion Of Privacy — Cardi B By The Way, I Forgive You — Brandi Carlile Scorpion — Drake H.E.R. — H.E.R. Beerbongs & Bentleys — Post Malone Dirty Computer — Janelle Monáe Golden Hour — Kacey Musgraves Black Panther: The Album, Music From And Inspired By (Various Artists)

Song Of The Year

“All The Stars” — Kendrick Duckworth, Solána Rowe, Al Shuckburgh, Mark Spears & Anthony Tiffith, songwriters (Kendrick Lamar & SZA) “Boo’d Up” — Larrance Dopson, Joelle James, Ella Mai & Dijon McFarlane, songwriters (Ella Mai) “God’s Plan” — Aubrey Graham, Daveon Jackson, Brock Korsan, Ron LaTour, Matthew Samuels & Noah Shebib, songwriters (Drake) “In My Blood” — Teddy Geiger, Scott Harris, Shawn Mendes & Geoffrey Warburton, songwriters (Shawn Mendes) “The Joke” — Brandi Carlile, Dave Cobb, Phil Hanseroth & Tim Hanseroth, songwriters (Brandi Carlile) “The Middle” — Sarah Aarons, Jordan K. Johnson, Stefan Johnson, Marcus Lomax, Kyle Trewartha, Michael Trewartha & Anton Zaslavski, songwriters (Zedd, Maren Morris & Grey) “Shallow” — Lady Gaga, Mark Ronson, Anthony Rossomando & Andrew Wyatt, songwriters (Lady Gaga & Bradley Cooper) “This Is America” — Donald Glover & Ludwig Goransson, songwriters (Childish Gambino)

Best New Artist

Chloe x Halle Luke Combs Greta Van Fleet H.E.R. Dua Lipa Margo Price Bebe Rexha Jorja Smith

Best Pop Solo Performance

“Colors” — Beck “Havana (Live)” — Camila Cabello “God Is A Woman” — Ariana Grande “Joanne (Where Do You Think You’re Goin’?)” — Lady Gaga “Better Now” — Post Malone

Best Pop Duo/Group Performance

“Fall In Line” — Christina Aguilera Featuring Demi Lovato “Don’t Go Breaking My Heart” — Backstreet Boys “‘S Wonderful” — Tony Bennett & Diana Krall “Shallow” — Lady Gaga & Bradley Cooper “Girls I Like You” — Maroon 5 Featuring Cardi B “Say Something” — Justin Timberlake Featuring Chris Stapleton “The Middle” — Zedd, Maren Morris & Grey

Best Traditional Pop Vocal Album

Love Is Here To Stay —Tony Bennett & Diana Krall My Way — Willie Nelson Nat “King” Cole & Me — Gregory Porter Standards (DELUXE) — Seal THE MUSIC…THE MEM’RIES…THE MAGIC! —Barbra Streisand

Best Pop Vocal Album

Camila — Camila Cabello Meaning Of Life — Kelly Clarkson Sweetener — Ariana Grande Shawn Mendes — Shawn Mendes Beautiful Trauma — P!nk Reputation — Taylor Swift

Best Alternative Music Album

Tranquility Base Hotel + Casino —Arctic Monkeys Colors — Beck Utopia — Björk American Utopia — David Byrne Masseduction — St. Vincent

Best Rap Performance

“Be Careful” — Cardi B “Nice For What” — Drake “King’s Dead” — Kendrick Lamar, Jay Rock, Future & James Blake “Bubblin” — Anderson .Paak “Sicko Mode” — Travis Scott, Drake, Big Hawk & Swae Lee

Best Rap/Sung Performance

“Like I Do” — Christina Aguilera Featuring Goldlink “Pretty Little Fears” — 6LACK Featuring J. Cole “This Is America” — Childish Gambino “All The Stars” — Kendrick Lamar & SZA “Rockstar” — Post Malone Featuring 21 Savage

Best Rap Song

“God’s Plan” — Aubrey Graham, Daveon Jackson, Brock Korsan, Ron LaTour, Matthew Samuels & Noah Shebib, songwriters (Drake) “King’s Dead” — Kendrick Duckworth, Samuel Gloade, James Litherland, Johnny McKinzie, Mark Spears, Travis Walton, Nayvadius Wilburn & Michael Williams II, songwriters (Kendrick Lamar, Jay Rock, Future & James Blake) “Lucky You” — R. Fraser, G. Lucas, M. Mathers, M. Samuels & J. Sweet, songwriters (Eminem Featuring Joyner Lucas) “Sicko Mode” — Khalif Brown, Rogét Chahayed, BryTavious Chambers, Mike Dean, Mirsad Dervic, Kevin Gomringer, Tim Gomringer, Aubrey Graham, John Edward Hawkins, Chauncey Hollis, Jacques Webster, Ozan Yildirim & Cydel Young, songwriters (Travis Scott, Drake, Big Hawk & Swae Lee) “Win” — K. Duckworth, A. Hernandez, J. McKinzie, M. Samuels & C. Thompson, songwriters (Jay Rock)

Best Rap Album

Invasion Of Privacy — Cardi B Swimming — Mac Miller Victory Lap — Nipsey Hussle Daytona — Pusha T Astroworld — Travis Scott

Best Music Video:

“APES***” — The Carters, Ricky Saiz, video director; Mélodie Buchris, Natan Schottenfels & Erinn Williams, video producers “This Is America” — Childish Gambino, Hiro Murai, video director; Ibra Ake, Jason Cole & Fam Rothstein, video producers “I’m Not Racist” Joyner Lucas & Ben Proulx, video directors; Joyner Lucas, video producer “Pynk” — Janelle Monáe, Emma Westenberg, video director; Justin Benoliel & Whitney Jackson, video producers “Mumbo Jumbo” — Tierra Whack Marco Prestini, video director; Sara Nassim, video producer

Best Music Film:

“Life in 12 Bars”— Eric Clapton, Lili Fini Zanuck, video director; John Battsek, Scooter Weintraub, Larry Yelen & Lili Fini Zanuck, video producers “Whitney” — (Whitney Houston), Kevin Macdonald, video director; Jonathan Chinn, Simon Chinn & Lisa Erspamer, video producers “Quincy” — Quincy Jones Alan Hicks & Rashida Jones, video directors; Paula DuPré Pesmen, video producer “Itzhak”— Itzhak Perlman, Alison Chernick, video director; Alison Chernick, video producer “The King” — (Elvis Presley), Eugene Jarecki, video director; Christopher Frierson, Georgina Hill, David Kuhn & Christopher St. John, video producers

#The Grammys #Underoath #FEVER 333 #Bring Me The Horizon #Between The Buried And Me #The Fever 333

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asflowersfade · 7 years ago

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Ficlet: Your Average Joe

A MacGyver ficlet. They’re on a stakeout and they’re bored, bored, bored! So bored, actually, that it’s starting to make Mac cranky. Mac’s POV.

Eh, I don’t even know what this is. I just sat down and started typing and this happened. Eh.

They’re on a stakeout, he and Jack, in a town better not named, staking out a military facility that officially doesn’t exist, waiting for someone - for whom, the intel didn’t specify, of course - to try to get their thieving little hands on a weapon that officially doesn’t exist either. And it’s sweltering hot. Just another lovely day at the office.

Mac’s not cranky. He’s not. But they’ve been sitting there for hours - and hours and hours! - and Jack’s been listening to the same Willie Nelson CD on repeat - over and over again! - and Mac’s almost out of paper clips, the dashboard’s littered with his doodles!

The last song on the CD is slowly winding down. And if Jack starts playing the damn thing from the beginning again, Mac will blow up the stereo on principle. He’s a patient man but even he has his limits!

Distraction, that’s what he needs.

“Hey, you’ve never actually told me why you left the army, back then, after Iraq,” Mac blurts out the first thing that comes to his mind when he sees Jack reach for the stereo button. “I mean, you always sound so proud when you talk about your Delta Force days, so... it never made much sense to me.”

The car remains blessedly quiet as Jack drops his hand and contemplates the question. But the longer the silence lasts, the more apprehensive Mac feels; he hopes he didn’t ask the wrong thing. He only wanted to distract Jack a little and he would hate it if his question brought back bad memories, if it hurt Jack.

Finally, Jack replies, staring out through the windshield at the sun-baked street, “I guess-I guess I loved the army but I didn’t particularly like it.”

Mac frowns, looking at him. “I don’t follow,” he admits.

Jack shoots him a self-deprecating smile. “Look, we both know I’m not the sharpest tool in the shed. I’m not dumb but I’ll never be as smart as you.”

Now Mac’s frown deepens. He hates it when Jack talks like that about himself because, yeah, sure, Jack might not know how to turn a cellphone into a bomb but he’s one of the wisest people Mac’s ever known, even though one needs to know Star Wars by heart to actually get his point most of the time. “That’s not true!” he protests.

But Jack shakes his head. “Hey, I’m not putting myself down, just stating the truth. Most people on this God given earth will never be as smart as you, kid, and I don’t mind joining the masses there. I’m your average Joe. I was a good football player but not good enough to make a career out of it. I got into college but I wasn’t smart enough to actually finish it.

“But I’m really good at this.” He pats his gun holster. “At fighting and shooting, kicking people’s asses… protecting them.” He gives Mac a meaningful look and Mac smiles. “So, you could say that I enlisted - that I chose this line of work - because of that. But... it was more than that.”

Mac turns in his seat a little to see Jack better. “Tell me,” he prompts.

Jack sighs and takes a moment before replying. “I love what the army stands for. And not just protecting my country, being a patriot and things like that. No. I love that it’s a home away from home. Your unit’s your family outside your family, you get me?” He glances at Mac.

But Mac… doesn’t, not really. Well, he does, in theory, but he’s always been more of a loner. Until he met Jack, that is, who chose Mac as his son slash little brother slash charge, basically his responsibility. And Mac loves him for it more than Jack will probably ever know, for giving Mac the sense of… security.

“So, yeah,” Jack continues. “I loved that about being in the army. But at the same time…” He shakes his head a little. “I hated being used as a-a hammer, sometimes without regard for collateral damage. I get it, it’s not easy to make decisions and give out orders, even from the safety of your office, but… to actually see the end result up front…

“So I left, after Iraq. And I joined the CIA, thinking that maybe it would suit me better, being able to make my own decisions in the field, as long as the mission was accomplished,” Jack says. “And, yeah, I got that. I was my own man, more or less. But at the same time, I couldn’t trust anyone, not even the people I was working with. Sure, there was Sarah. And Matty. But those were the exceptions. And I hate not being able to trust people, it eats me up on the inside.”

Mac nods. He knows that. Jack hates secrets and lies.

“And so I went back, thinking that maybe something changed, that it would be different, being in the army. Maybe my pa’s passing had something to do with it, too, I don’t know.” Jack pauses, then sighs. “But it wasn’t. Different, I mean.”

“Well, if the army disappointed you and the whole spy business, too, then why are you here? Working for the Foundation?” Mac asks.

Jack laughs quietly and thumps Mac on the thigh with his fist playfully. “Why? Because then you came along, you fool.”

“Me?” Mac says, a little surprised.

“Yeah, you,” Jack replies, still smiling. “Pale and skinny, with the nerdiest, most ridiculous name ever and I realized, I didn’t need the army. All I needed was to find the right people and stick with them.”

“So… I’m the ‘right people,’ then?” Mac asks with a small smile.

“You know you are, man,” Jack tells him, completely serious. “I’ve never trusted anyone the way I trust you. I would follow you anywhere. And you know why?”

Mac shakes his head a little.

Jack looks at him, hard. “Because I know you would never abuse it.”

Oh, Mac thinks, dropping his eyes. “Thanks,” he replies thickly because… what else could he say to that? Nothing would be adequate.

“Does that mean you won’t blow up the car stereo, after all?” Jack asks and when Mac looks up quickly, he sees Jack smirking mischievously.

“How--?” Mac stammers out in surprise.

Jack’s smile widens. “You do this-this thing with your face when you’re really annoyed, bordering on homicidal.”

“I do not!” Mac replies, affronted.

“Yes, you do. You always clench your jaw real tight and then this little vein you’ve got here” --Jack points-- “starts pulsing like crazy. Let me tell you, that’s not good for you, longterm. You’re lucky the Foundation has a good dental.” He nods sagely.

“That’s not-- I don’t do that!” Mac protests, huffing, and straightens up in his seat. Nonsense, this!

But Jack lifts his eyebrows and his head bobs. “Yes, you do, you so do! And you also--”

Luckily, their thief arrives soon after. But it doesn’t stop them from bickering all the way through the car chase and the apprehension of said criminal in a rather spectacular fashion at the local mall. It’s all quite flashy and unforgettable. Matty will be so pleased. Not.

And then, since they’re already there - though the mall’s looking rather worse for wear despite their best efforts - Mac gets Jack a new Willie Nelson CD because the old one got trashed together with their car. And Jack gets Mac a big box of paper clips.

Tomorrow, they’ll do it all over again. And they wouldn’t have it any other way.

#macgyver #angus macgyver #jack dalton #thehemingwaygoldfish #my fics

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thejonzone · 4 years ago

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Jon Writes a Year-End List

My favorite songs of 2020, alphabetically by artist

Bedouine (Margo Guryan cover)- The Hum

The original Guryan version is good but Bedouine’s take is cleaner, all the better to emphasize Guryan’s blissful songwriting. I could listen to the chords in the chorus forever.

Bob Dylan- I’ve Made Up My Mind to Give My Heart to You

It’s nice to hear Bob sing a yearning and clear-eyed love song. And the way he stretches out his words gives the whole thing a confidence that’s easy to get lost in.

Boldy James- Giant Slide

Boldy had a great year, and it’s The Price of Tea in China with Alchemist producing that stood out to me.

Empty Country- Becca

I don’t go to music festivals anymore, but listening to this album makes me dream of hearing it live, while being dehydrated, sweaty, feet hurting, holding in a p*op, a late afternoon sunburn loading. I want the whole thing!!

fawning, Rui Gabriel ft. Jack Riley- God

Toss it on the cloudy day walking playlist!

Frances Quinlan- Went to LA

Great cathartic yell in this one. Quinlan builds up a palpable tension here. It rocks.

Judy ft. Jack Dolan, jommis- Say What U Mean

You’ve got to imagine these fellas knew they had put a few catchy melodies down while trying to out-croon each other.

Kurt Vile ft. John Prine (John Prine cover)- How Lucky

A Prine acolyte with a feature from the man himself. RIP.

Lala Lala, Grapetooth- Valentine

Kind of like a slow-dance song at nightmare prom. I love the percussion and Frankel’s villainously-low voice.

Lil Durk- Street Affection

The range of emotions Durk can access and scroll through is impressive.

Miranda Winters- Little Baby Dead Bird

Scuzzy guitar and violin create a hypnotic effect in this evocative dirge. Miranda Winters is such a good singer. Check out her main band, Melkbelly-- they put out a great album this year!

Nap Eyes- Mark Zuckerberg

Two guitars: one is pointy, the other is chugging. That is the correct way to do two guitars.

Noname- Song 33

This song is 70 seconds. 70! Noname casually negates J. Cole and the song isn’t even about him. She’s so great.

Ratboys- I Go Out at Night

Julia Steiner is on her The Hours shit in this melancholic fantasy of leaving and not returning.

Rio da Yung OG, Lil Yachty- 1v1

I like how Yachty comes in on his verse! It’s been fun to see him back in action with his new Michigan friends. Rio is the star here, though. And Enrgy too.

Soccer Mommy- yellow is the color of her eyes

Sophia Allison’s delivery of “The tiny lie I told to myself is making me hollow” might be my line of the year.

Swamp Dogg- Memories

The whole of Sorry You Couldn’t Make It is great, but for Swamp Dogg, who has covered John Prine, to work with the man before he died is a special accomplishment, and we’re better off that it’s recorded.

Tall Juan- Irene

One of my favorite 2020 releases. And I’ll be a bit vulnerable here folks….when I am walking outside and this song comes on, I push my butt out a little bit and walk like I have rhythm and purpose.

Tierra Whack- Dora

I’m so excited to see what Tierra Whack does, from her beat selection to how she jumps between flow and cadence. She understands herself so well.

Non-2020-specific Music I Enjoyed, in Superlative Form

Group Vocal Performance Most Likely to Pierce Your Heartless Facade

Yesu Ka Mkwebaze

Best Song to Listen to if You are an 1850’s-era whaler in Your Feels

Mary Ann

Favorite Duet (Not Blood-Related)

Emmylou Harris and Herb Pedersen (but mostly Emmylou) create such an intricate and gorgeous melody on “If I Could Only Win Your Love”. Pedal steel heads and mandolin freaks, eat up.

Favorite Duet (Blood-related)

The Louvin Brothers- When I Stop Dreaming

Any longtime friends of the show know I’m a big fan of the singing duo The Louvin Brothers. They’ve got that golden country tone but it’s the blood harmony that turns these guys into something else entirely.

And here’s the kicker, folks. Emmylou covered When I Stop Dreaming! How coincidental for all of us reading this End of Year list…. The Louvins are my preferred version, but Emmylou, that you could help me make this connection is enough, dayenu!

Most Surprising Use of a Song in a Network TV Show

"Yama Yama" by the Yamasuki Singers, Fargo Season 2

When I was a dishwasher at St. James Cheese Co., late 2016ish, this CD was in our back of house music rotation. It is a magical album-- a Japanese children's choir with French pop production (think a bunch of bells and shit). I never learned the name of the album while working there and it fell out of my mind until years later when, after remembering how much I loved it, realized I had no idea how to find it. The pain of typing different spellings of “japanese children’s choir” into google for days on end.....I literally yelled when Fargo used this in its Season 2 big boy shootout. *chef’s kiss*

Best Album by a Spiritually Hungry Musical Genius, Lapping Her Contemporaries in Arrangement, Theme, and Songwriting, Gone Before Her Time

Judee Sill’s self-titled debut.

Best Use of a Second Keyboard in A Keyboard Solo

Fountains of Wayne’s Red Dragon Tattoo

Do I mean to say synthesizer? Not sure. RIP Adam Schlesinger and long live FoW. What a loss.

Best Vibes/ Song I’d Most Want to Show Ezra Koenig so That We’d Bond & Become Friends

Zibote

Best Lyrics Written by a Jew in 1920’s NYC Being Sung by Willie Nelson

Lonely rivers flow to the sea, to the sea / to the open arms of the sea

Favorite TV Shows

Ramy

-Second season shook its focus on the titular character and oh am I thankful. Not that Ramy himself isn’t great, he is, but the entire cast here deserves attention. The Uncle Naseem episode. The Uncle Naseem episode. Ahem. The Uncle Naseem episode.

Joe Pera Talks with You

Lovecraft Country

-Small gripes and complicated plotlines aside, this anthology connecting gothic horror, racism, and American history is phenomenal.

Small Axe

-The second installment in this series, Lovers Rock, which takes place at a party, is the vicarious shot in the arm you deserve, you little extroverted thing you.

I May Destroy You

Betty

The Last Dance

-The first Bulls game I ever went to was the first game *without* Michael Jordan, at the beginning of the ‘98-’99 season. Bad timing.

The Chi

Schitt’s Creek

-This show was never about the plot. Am I allowed to say that? I’ve never cared less for a plot and more for a cast. Catherine O’Hara is in her own league above us all.

Jon Writes a Year-End List

In 2019, my roommate June and I took a road trip through the Upper Peninsula of Michigan. I was out of a relationship, happily or unhappily I wasn’t sure yet, but along the way I downloaded Tinder hoping to meet a local who’d be excited to make out with me. There wasn’t much bite on my line, but by the time we reached Marquette, largely due to my good looks and charisma I’d orchestrated some type of group date with June, me, a girl from Tinder, and her friend.

We met at a dingy karaoke bar and drank for cheap. Nobody wanted to hear me sing, but I got on stage anyway and gave “Willin” by Little Feat a go. Some guy at the bar in a maroon work shirt looked at me, scoffed, and left to smoke outside. The four of us weren’t hitting it off, even with alcohol. I and the friend made a plan to sing “Mommas Don’t Let Your Babies Grow up to Be Cowboys'', but she quickly abandoned the duet after we had begun, citing a lack of vibes.

But we kept singing and drinking and hours later I was leaning against the bar, waiting to order, standing next to maroon-shirt guy who had so easily shrugged off my existence earlier. What caught my eye as I stood next to him was a Star of David tattoo on his forearm. And sure enough, the name tag stitched onto his shirt identified him as “Isaac”. Well I’ll goddamn be-- this guy was frickin Jewish! I was shocked-- I assumed he was goy in the same way I assumed everyone I ran into up there would be.

For just one unconscious assumption (I’m the only Jewish person in this Marquette karaoke bar) to be wrong felt great. My assumptions are really awful. I assumed maroon-shirt hated my guts. I assumed these two girls we were drinking with thought I was a loser too. I assume people don’t like me or respect me or have any interest in getting to know me. I tell awful stories about myself to myself, and my assumptions about the world are limiting and boring! With patience, “guy at bar who kinda scowled at me” had all of a sudden turned into “my new friend Isaac” who, after a few minutes of conversation, I “asked to bum a cigarette from.”

One of my favorite shows of 2020 was Joe Pera Talks With You. I still remember watching Joe Pera’s stand-up for the first time, and then rewatching and rewatching, savoring his cadence. He dressed and spoke like a grandpa, replete with pitch-perfect, kinda-gross mouth sounds, stutters, and low-but-driving energy. It’s a good bit, and Joe has morphed it into probably the funniest, sweetest, and least-pandering show of 2020. What I love about this show is its foundational belief that anyone can surprise you, you just need to give yourself time to notice.

I didn’t end up making out with anyone but I did wake up the next morning with the worst hangover of my life. Wake up, barf, whimper. As June drove us out of Marquette, I could barely keep my eyes open. I did notice, however, a massive, wooden structure jutting out into Lake Superior.

It is this same Lake Superior structure that Joe Pera Talks With You fixates on for its first shot of Season 2. Yes, this is an Adult Swim show that takes place in none other than Marquette, Michigan! Which is weird. Think about other movies, shows, or books that take place in the U.P. You can’t! Even zooming out to include the larger Upper-Great Lakes region leaves us with an almost-empty net: The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald by Gordon Lightfoot and titular Gatsby’s origin story on Lake Superior. These are stories of hard living and life and death on the dangerous Great Lakes. But neither of those are specific to the Upper Peninsula.

Regions are an easy if reductive lens with which to attempt to view and understand people. In 2020, broad and sweeping generalizations about large swaths of people continued to gain power. There was the movie adaptation of JD Vance’s ahistorical Hillbilly Elegy. Woolly-eyed liberals trotted out fake maps of a preferred America that holds only the “good” blue states, not at all engaging in the history of racism and voter suppression that got us here. Besides the fact that Georgia went blue. And Democratic strongholds like California, New York, and Chicago betray any notion of a “better” America. The sins of this nation are not cordoned off into one section or time zone, no region is monolithic, and most importantly, no person can be explained away with a quick sentence.

There is no regional monolith more widely misunderstood than the Midwestern gestalt. Fargo (the show) does a great job of serializing this one type of Midwestern character-- they say “oh sure, happy to help” and they’re murderers. So for Joe Pera to settle his show in the U.P. is a fun choice. Most Americans are probably hard-pressed to conjure an accurate mental picture of who the U.P. is, so Pera creates his own flavor of a seemingly-recognizable small Midwestern town.

In the first episode, Joe walks us through the bean arch he’s growing. Why grow snap beans? “Beans are straightforward.” Straightforwardness, or the appearance of, is central to Pera’s charm. Pera’s shtick is walking the audience through a basic task that can serve as a metaphor for a larger existential question. This conceit isn’t new to Pera, but it has been en vogue recently, with shows like Andy Daly’s Review and the new HBO show How To with John Wilson. These shows present a simple stated goal that obfuscates a larger, more complex grapple.

Joe Pera Talks With You is incredible and endearing because of the genuine tone Pera gives his tight-knit Marquette. We’re getting deranged lunatics like Conner O’Malley and Dan Licata to write jokes for 70-year old Michigan grandmas at a salon. The show trades in the perceived Midwestern folksiness for a punchline, yet doesn’t lose itself in irony or resentment.

Every character in the Joe Pera universe has the opportunity to be profound. Pera gives every character the patience they deserve; even O’Malley’s berserk Joe Rogan listening-caricature Mike Melsky gets incredible moments of vulnerability. It’s a rare comedy: self-aware but not self-obsessed, sweet but not gross, and uniquely funny.

Nowhere else on TV are you going to see such consistently great acting. Some of the best working comedians are in this season. Conner O’Malley has found a way to tap into his unsettling grotesque that is a pleasure to watch, playing characters at the ends of their ropes, shrieking. Jo Firestone is hilarious and essential as Joe’s doom-prepper girlfriend Sarah. We get guest stars like genius Carmen Christopher. Even one-line role players like Joe’s teacher-coworker, who says Joe and Sarah go together “like desk and chair,” knock it out of the park.

The questions at the heart of Talks With You feel more pronounced in a year of death and isolation. How do we connect with people? How can we really be there for our loved ones? How can we feel comfortable in our own skin? The show came out pre-pandemic but Pera’s touch and pacing is universal.

It’s difficult not to compare Talks With You to How to with John Wilson. The two shows have a lot in common. Both protagonists are soft-spoken, and speak at an arrhythmic clip. John Wilson’s voice is affected just like Pera’s; both vocal deliveries are meant to engender trust by signaling to us that they’re lacking some social confidence. But I don’t buy Wilson’s shtick as much as Pera’s.

John Wilson’s show is not straightforward in the same way Pera’s is, and the show suffers under the added weight of pretense. Wilson’s tangents lead us to places that barely fit under the established thematic umbrella and feel forced. On memory, Wilson’s adventure with the Mandela Effect turns from fascinating to boring as the truthers devolve into sketch characters, viewing simple spelling errors with magnifying glasses. “How to Cover Your Furniture” spends an upsettingly long amount of time with an anti-circumcision advocate as Wilson works through the question of how much we are allowed to change parts of other people. Meant to appear as if they effortlessly fell into place, these characters feel shoe-horned in.

Both characters and shows are performative authenticity, and Joe Pera and John Wilson’s whole deal is their status as observer. This year, many of us have become observers. I know I have: unemployed, unable to see people, watching death counts climb, sending money to various bail funds and rent relief to people and organizations near and far. There is a responsibility to being an observer. It is not some callous task. Being an effective observer means allowing your subject the space they need to be as they are and not foisting your own nonsense onto them.

In Joe Pera’s America, it’s understood that everyone is weird. By virtue of being human, we are all weird, off, we do confusing things, and say dumb stuff that doesn’t make sense. Even you’re a weird freak. John Wilson’s subjects seem like circus animals, squeezed in front of the camera for their fucked-up little flip. I can’t shake the feeling that John Wilson is making fun of the people he’s observing. Pera’s observations are rooted in the fairness that comes from seeing humanity in people-- every person has an equal chance of surprising you with how weird they are if you just make them comfortable and let them talk. We owe that to each other.

To be fair, these shows are also very different. Wilson’s found-footage, documentary style is ingenious, hilarious, and completely not the vibe that Pera and Co. are going for at all. And region here is everything. Wacky stuff happening in NYC? Eh, isn’t that par for the course over there? Wait, a show set in Michigan’s Upper Peninsula? Ok...now that I’ve never seen.

Obviously I was wrong about Isaac in Marquette, just as any broad assumption about a region and its people will be. I actually learned that Jews have a significant relationship to the U.P. And I found similarities between my own Jewish history, covering a similarly nebulous area of the Rust Belt/Midwest, and my U.P. cousins. Yes, home was closer than I thought, even across the length of Lake Michigan. Yes, people don’t just hate my guts. Yes, we can overcome lazy assumptions and we can even connect with people. We can make a better world. It just requires patience and listening.

Now, on to my thoughts regarding Fiona Apple’s landmark album Fetch the Bolt Cutters...

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surveystodestressme · 7 years ago

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94.

5000 Question Survey Pt. 23

2101. Are you an optimist? i like to think so 2102. If you were in the Breakfast Club, which character would you be? judd nelson 2103. Who do you have no respect for? arrogant or rude people 2104. Is the plural form of cactus cactuses or cactii? cactii Is the plural form of penis penises or penii? penises. 2105. What does your favorite coffee mug look like? it has a chick on it and says biker above it (biker chic)

2106. Have you ever gotten hurt at a concert? some guy elbowed me in the face but it wasn’t that bad

2107. What age do you think it is most difficult to be? early adulthood since youre just figuring everything out and you probably dont have a good job and can hardly pay for bills and all these new responsibilities

2108. Do you like to be considered weird or different? i don’t really care either way 2109. Do you think you could handle a day in jail? nope 2110. Is your body an amusement park? what? 2111. Are dj’s obsolete? not necessarily 2112. What is the best liquid in existence? water. 2113. What is turning out better than expected? life??? lol 2114. Who is the most overbearing person you know? my boyfriend’s mother honestly lol 2115. Who does it surprise you that you are close to? idk 2116. Apparently Eminem got booed at the MTV music video awards because he was making fun of Moby onstage. What do you think of this? doesn’t affect me 2117. Close your eyes. What do you see? nothing? lol 2118. What’s the best Van Halen song? idk any off the top of my head 2119. What do you picture when you hear the word “Puritans?” i honestly don’t picture anything 2120. Have you ever been on a trampoline? yes, but it’s been a while. 2121. What do you use batteries for the most often? camera 2122. What do you find thrilling? when i’m on the motorcycle with jack and he goes really, really fast 2123. Porch swing. Sunrise. What else could you ask for? a drink. 2124. Do you like William Shatner’s cover of Mr Tambourine Man? never heard it. 2125. Where’s the sexiest place to have a piercing? i always thought lip piercings were sexy but now i’m really into nose piercings but only on women tbh 2126. Do you get panic attacks? yes 2127. How long does getting dressed to go to a club take you? the same amount of time it takes me to get dressed in the morning for work lol no more than 10 mins. 2128. What is Adam Ant’s best song? idk 2129. Does your body need improvement or is it just fine? it needs improvement but i’m not unhappy with it 2130. Does watching MTV or reading beauty magazines make you feel bad about yourself? i don’t do those things but nah i don’t think they would 2132. What is the most romantic movie ever? i used to think the notebook, but i don’t know lol 2133. Do you think that woman are treated as second class citizens of this world? yes. 2134. What would you do if you were at a dance club with your significant other and he or she got into a fistfight with someone? first of all, jack wouldn’t do that (i hope) second, i would intervene and not let him make a fool of himself 2135. Has anyplace ever asked you to leave? no. 2136. Have you ever been openly kicked out? no. 2137. Are you permanently banned from anywhere? no. 2138. Who is your favorite movie director? i don’t care about that kind of stuff 2139. What topic do you hate to talk about? politics. 2140. Are you looking forward to the remake of Willie Wonka and the Chocolate factory or do you think it could never be as good as the original? it’s been done & i didn’t like it that much at all 2141. Do you enjoy the band Ministry? idk who that is 2142. What is your coziest article of clothing? this humane society sweater i have, i love it sm 2143. What is your favorite word to say? shit 2144. Does your name and your signifigant other’s name feel like one word to you? nah 2145. Do you like the band the Buzzcocks? idk them. 2146. Can you tell when other people are lying? sometimes 2147. Do you like to wear glitter? i would on my eyelids if i had some but that’s about it. 2148. Would you prefer to wrap your own presents or have them all giftwrapped? i am awful at wrapping presents so i wouldnt mind getting them giftwrapped 2149. Where do you go when you want to meet new people? i don’t meet new people on purpose lol 2150. What is the best first sentence to a book, in your opinion? one of the john green books ad a really good beginning but i cant remember which one it was 2151. Should fun or safety come first? safety. 2152. Does mind over matter work for you? sometimes. 2153. What’s the most weight you ever lost in one year? i don’t even want to think about it 2154. What are your feelings about punk and goth? i think they’re cool 2155. Did you ever write something when you were high and then looked at it sober and realized that it was nonsense? probably 2156. How often do you shave: (guys) your face? (girls) your legs? in the winter, almost never. but in the summer maybe once a week (girls) under your arms? every week. 2157. What word do you often hear people misuse? idk. 2158. Have you ever used somebody? not that i remember 2159. Are you paranoid? sometimes 2160. What is the best music video of all time? i like some shinedown videos and five finger death punch videos 2161. How many Shakespeare plays have you read all the way through? hamlet, romeo and juliet 2162. What was the deepest religious or spiritual experience you’ve ever had? i thought i saw a ghost once at church if that counts 2163. What is it like to be you today? not that exciting 2164. Do you like to play games? i love to 2165. Have you made any good friends on this diary site? no. 2166. Have you met anyone from open diary? no. 2167. What have you done lately that gave everyone something to talk about? getting drunk and crying over a video game 2168. Do you get along with people who annoy you, disagree with you, dislike you, and hate you? no, why would i? 2169. When you ask for something do you make a request or a demand? request, unless it’s of utmost importance 2170. Who are you a bad influence on? i don’t think anyone 2171. Who are you a good influence on? hopefully my friends. 2172. Who is on your Christmas list this year? just my boyfriend, my family and i adopt a family now so we don’t buy each other presents just presents for people who cannot afford a christmas 2173. How many other people do you know of that are doing this survey? no one that i know 2174. Have you ever intentionally had a one night stand? never had one period. 2175. Do you tend to get car sick? nope 2176. What is the legnth of your hair? very short, buzzed on one side 2177. Do you like to listen to techno music? i don’t mind it 2178. Have you ever dyed your hair an unusual color? red, purple, blue 2179. What do you think of these diary names? Oculto: suffer victim: With A Purpose: Almost_Famous: In.The.Name.Of.Lust: The Phallic Stapler: <*>SeXyCandace<*>: dont care. 2180. What do you think of these entry titles? Lesbians … as far as the eye can see: Why Avril Lavigne sucks: Call On Jesus: Buddha-licious: WeLCome To The JungLe!: Geektastic: Should i get an abortion?: 2181. What do you find beautiful in an atypical way? idk. 2182. What would you PHYSICALLY fight someone over? i don’t know 2183. What was the last thing you were invited to? a wedding 2184. What do you like lots of things 2185. Have you ever drank: chartruese? no. absinth? no. but i want to 2186. Do you plan your outfits ahead of time, pick them out the morning of, wear whatever was on the floor, or wear what you slept in? i usually plan them ahead of time but when i get lazy i just put them together when i wake up in the morning 2187. How long have you ever gone without changing your sheets: a really long time honestly lol clothes: no more than a day. underwear: 2 days max toothbrush: usually monthly but it’s been a couple months and i need a new one 2189. What item should not be shared? condoms? lol 2190. How do you keep control of your temper? breathing deeply before i start talking to someone 2191. If you could gain all of your dreams by giving a family member (little brother) to the goblin king who would turn him into a goblin, would you? yes, my brother lol 2192. Do you like to listen to Duran Duran? i don’t mind it 2193. Do you ever feel the need for MORE than life has to offer? ehh sometimes 2194. What is your favorite children’s story? love you forever 2195. Do you think that adult books should have more pictures? nah 2196. What was your all time low? in high school 2197. Do you make up songs and sing them to yourself when you’re alone? when i’m bored or when i’m cleaning 2198. Do you like to listen to the Smashing Pumpkins? they’re good 2199. Do you see the expression of emotion as weakness? not at all. 2200. Are you prepared in case of chemical, biological and nuclear attacks? not even close lol

#bored #survey #questions #quiz

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sounds10thapr1976-blog · 7 years ago

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Onto the actual text this time, including a Contents page so you should be able to work out how long you have to wait for the articles you’re interested in.

Page 2 SOUNDS April 10, 1976

CONTENTS

FEATURES David Bowie 12-14 Bill Bruford 16 War 17 PFM 18-19 Kate and Anna McGarrigle 19 Led Zeppelin 20 Bachman Turner Overdrive 27 Clive Davis 30 Guitar Special 32-39 Miracles 45

REGULARS News 2-4 Charts 6 Wax Fax 7 High Society 8-10 Jaws 11 Albums 20-24 Singles 40-41 Reggae 41 Fair Deal 42 Letters 44 Steppin’ Out 46-48 On The Road 49-51 New Sounds 54

SOUNDS

EDITOR Alan Lewis

DEPUTY EDITOR Alf Martin

FEATURES EDITOR Barbara Charone

SPECIAL PROJECTS Phil Sutcliffe

NEWS EDITOR Hugh Fielder

EDITORIAL Geoff Barton Dave Fudger Susanne Garrett Vivien Goldman Jonh Ingham Tony Mitchell

CONTRIBUTORS Mick Brown Giovanni Dadomo Flip Fraser Jerry Gilbert Dan Hedges Robin Katz Dave Laing John Peel

PHOTOGRAPHER Mike Putland

IN AMERICA Toby Goldstein 212 672 3166 Al Rudis Steve Rosen Ted Joseph Peter Crescenti

ADVERTISEMENT MANAGER Jonathan Ward

TELEPHONE SALES MANAGER Eddie Fitzgerald

ADVERTISEMENT PRODUCTION Len Driver

MANAGING DIRECTOR Jack Hutton

EDITORIAL DIRECTOR Mike Sharman

ADVERTISEMENT DIRECTOR Peter Wilkinson

Spotlight Publications, Stoplight House, 1 Benwell Road, London N7 7AX. Telephone: 01-607 6411.

NEWSDESK

KISS MAYHEM Three attacks by the US destroyers

KISS, US kings of heavy rock in heavy make-up, are at last to play three gigs in Britain next month.

Despite the transatlantic publicity they have so far made little impact on record here but their fourth UK album ‘Destroyer’ will be released on Casablanca to coincide.

The label also plan to back up the full frontal assault on the British market with giveaways at the concerts including arm bands and Kiss masks and a TV advertising campaign.

The dates are: Manchester Free Trade Hall May 13, Birmingham Odeon 14, Hammersmith Odeon 15. The band may use their own jet-liner on the tour.

‘UNOFFICIAL’ FLOYD A PINK FLOYD single taken from ‘Wish You Were Here’ is being released in this country in a special limited edition of 10,000.

It will be ‘Have A Cigar’ b/w ‘Shine On You Crazy Diamond’ and comes through an exclusive distribution deal arranged by Lightning Records with the Dutch company who originally released it.

The last of the official Floyd singles released in the UK was ‘Point Me At The Sky’ and they have recently again vetoed any further single releases here, though they put them out in every other record buying country, because of what they regard as the lightweight pop image of the charts here.

ALVIN, FAIRPORT IN FOOTBALL FEST BANK HOLIDAY Monday is now set to be the biggest day ever in live rock in the UK – another huge football ground festival probably starring Alvin Lee has been announced, coinciding with the Who and Co. putting the boot in at Charlton (see opposite page).

The Southend Charity Festival Committee say that contracts are expected to be signed this week for a line-up starring Alvin and Friends, Budgie, and the debut of the new Fairport Convention.

Support acts planned are The Dave Bromberg Band, Magna Carta, the Mickey Jupp Band and Crossbreed with our very own John Peel compering.

Confirmation came from the business end Alvin and the Fairports that they were likely to do the gig though it was still being negotiated – neither band’s line-up has yet been announced.

The Festival is run for the benefit of Christian Aid relief and development projects in the third world.

It starts at 11 am and runs through to 9pm at Southend United Football Ground. Tickets are now on sale from the ground in Victoria Avenue at £2 though they will be £2.50 on the day. Postal applicants should send an SAE with cheques and postal orders made out to ‘Southend Sounds ’76.’

SOME OF THESE KNIGHTS GLADYS KNIGHT And The Pips will tour Britain later this month doing two shows a night in five venues, her last visit for some time as she is pregnant.

The dates are: Bournemouth Winter Gardens April 23, Manchester Palace 24, Southport New Theatre 25, London New Victoria 27, Birmingham Odeon 30.

They will be bringing their own rhythm section and the tour coincides with the UK release of their States hit ‘Midnight Train To Georgia’.

Gladys is also starring in a movie titled ‘Pipedreams’ due for release in Britain in the autumn.

STILL NO TUBES Tubes’ record company A&M say that they cannot tour the UK in May as their new album ‘Young and Rich’ (produced by Ken Scott who worked on the Supertramp albums) will be released then and they will be touring the States to promote it.

But they have been trying to arrange a London venue to do a possible week of shows later in the year as well as provincial dates and A&M said they were “virtually certain” to come to Britain in ’76.

RECORD NEWS

JON DOES THE LOT Jon Anderson, who plays just occasional acoustic and percussion with Yes, has been a one-man band on his solo album ‘Olias Of Sunhillow’ released by Atlantic on May 7. He wrote the words and music and plays all instruments including keyboards and harp.

He will perform excerpts from it on OGWT on May 11 and get a spot in the Daily Telegraph colour supplement on the release date. Yes start a three-month tour of the States in late May.

REAL THING release a single in mid-May to tie in with their guest appearance with David Essex at Earl’s Court on May 15.

BARNEY JAMES, ex-drummer with Rick Wakeman’s English Rock Ensemble, has his first solo single out on April 9 on the Solddon label. Titled ‘All The Prizes Taken’ it’s from his album ‘Koneg – The Second Coming’ scheduled for May release.

JOHNNY TAYLOR’S US number one hit ‘ Disco Lady’ has been rush released in the UK by Columbia. Taylor is a soul black veteran who first recorded in the 50s and had a string of hits on Stax during the past decade, including the classic ‘Who’s Making Love’. He joined Epic after the recent Stax collapse.

FREDDIE MACK, who played ‘Mr ‘Superbad’ in the K-Tel TV ads for the album of the same name last year, has a single of the same name out on Contempo on April 23. It’s called ‘Mr Superbad’.

LINDA LEWIS, whose current single on Bell is a Van McCoy song ‘Baby I’m Yours’, is heading for New Orleans to record with Allen Toussaint. Later in the summer she will co-star with John Miles in a Mike Mansfield TV special.

GRAND FUNK have signed to EMI International for the world outside North America.

NANARETH’s single ‘Love Hurts’ and album ‘Hair Of The Dog’ have both gone gold in the States.

ANNE-KARINE THINGNAES, Norwegian Eurovision Song Contest entry ‘Mata Hari’ is being released by DJM in the UK.

MOON WILLAIMS new single on DJM ‘Every Time I Take The Time’ will be ‘endorsed’ in radio ads by admirers including Deep Purple, The Rubettes, Angie Bowie and Biddu.

SHIRLEY BASSEY has a single called ‘Natali’ released on April 9 by United Artists. It’s taken from an Album ‘Love Life And Feeling’ out on April 23.

BONNIE DOBSON is recording a new album for Polydor and tracks so far completed include ‘Morning Dew’ (which she originally wrote) ‘A Taste Of Honey’, ‘Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow’ and ‘Here Comes The Sun’. The album is scheduled for July release.

URIAH HEEP have finished work on their new album, ‘High And Mighty’, which is the first that the band have produced themselves. It will be released in May.

ARISTA RECORDS have taken over Haven Records in America which gives them such artists as the Righteous Brothers, Gene Redding, Willie Harry Nelson, Eve Sands, and Rob Grill and the Grassroots. The Righteous Brothers and Willie Harry Nelson have albums due for release shortly.

‘THE HAPLESS Child And Other Inscrutable Stories’ is the title of an album released by Virgin next weekend. The music is by Mike Mantler and lyrics by Edward Gorey and among those taking part are Robert Wyatt, Carla Bley, Terge Rypdal, Steve Swallow and Jack De Johnette.

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SOUND CITY T-SHIRTS for ONLY 65p When you buy one set of SOUND CITY STRINGS – Ask your dealer

Next time: page three

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icefang100 · 7 years ago

Text

Song List [1183 Songs]

I keep a list of any and all songs I enjoy, and I figured someone here might want to give it a listen, too, so I’ve decided to post it - I’ll update this list periodically (probably once every few months?). The list is alphabetized, and (as such) is prone to leaping wildly from genre to genre, sorry.

Songs are below the “keep reading” divider - be warned, it’s (obviously) a very long post.

-"'Til my Last Day", by Justin Moore -"(Kissed You) Goodnight", by Gloriana -"21 Guns", by Green Day -"21st Century Pop Song", by Hymie's Basement -"22", by Taylor Swift -"30 Minutes", by t.A.T.u. -"A Big Day for Grimley", by AJJ -"A Boy Named Sue", by Johnny Cash -"Accidentally Daisies", by Danny Schmidt -"Achilles Come Down", by Gang of Youths -"A Country Boy can Survive", by Hank Williams, Jr. -"A Death", by An Unkindness -"A Deer Mistaking Candles for Headlights", by Crywank -"Adelaide", by Meg Myers -"Afraid", by The Neighbourhood -"After the Storm", by Mumford & Sons -"A Girl Named Tex", by Trocadero -"Agnes", by Glass Animals -"Aha!", by Pentatonix -"Ain't Goin' Down ('Til the Sun Comes Up)", by Garth Brooks -"Ain't It Fun", by Paramore -"Ain't No Rest for the Wicked", by Cage the Elephant -"Ain't Worth the Whiskey", by Cole Swindell -"Albany", by Ghost Mice -"Albatross", by Big Wreck -"Alcohol", by Brad Paisley -"A Little More", by Eric Hutchinson -"All-American Girl", by Carrie Underwood -"All About Tonight", by Blake Shelton -"All Alright", by Zac Brown Band -"All Eyes On Me", by Or3o -"Alligator Teeth", by Mother Falcon -"All my Exes Live in Texas", by George Strait -"All my Friends Say", by Luke Bryan -"All my Life", by Foo Fighters -"All My Little Words", by The Magnetic Fields -"All of Me", by John Legend -"All Star", by Smash Mouth -"All the Dead Kids", by AJJ -"All the Right Moves", by OneRepublic -"All the Small Things", by Blink 182 -"All The Time", by Tom Waits -"All the Wine", by The National -"All To Myself", by Marianas Trench -"Alma", by Tom Lehrer -"Almost Every Door", by The Mountain Goats -"Always Gold", by Radical Face -"Amarillo by the Morning", by George Strait -"American Healthcare (Glitzy)", by Penelope Scott -"American Honey", by Lady Antebellum -"American Idiot", by Green Day -"American Kids", by Kenny Chesney -"American Ride", by Toby Keith -"American Tune", by AJJ -"Ampersand", by Amanda Palmer -"Amsterdam", by Imagine Dragons -"Angel", by Sarah McLachlan -"Angel Eyes", by Love and Theft -"Angel of Death", by AJJ -"Angels are Weeping", by Nox Arcana -"Angel With a Shotgun", by the Cab -"Animal Keeper", by George Barnett -"Anthem for the Already Defeated", by Rock Plaze Central -"Anxiety (I Just Wanna Be Calm)", by Chris Ray Gun -"Anxiety Song", by Human Petting Zoo -"Anything Like Me", by Brad Paisley -"A Perfect Sonnet", by Bright Eyes -"A Poem", by AJJ -"Apologize", by OneRepublic -"Appetite for Destruction", by Vo Williams -"Are We All We Are", by P!nk -"Are You Gonna be my Girl", by Jet -"Are You Happy Now?", by Michelle Branch -"Are You Satisfied?", by Marina & the Diamonds -"Are You Sure", by Willie Nelson -"Arsonist's Lullaby", by Hozier -"A Rush of Blood To the Head", by Coldplay -"A Sadness Runs Through Him", by The Hoosiers -"As Good As I Once Was", by Toby Keith -"A Song Dedicated To the Memory of Stormy the Rabbit", by AJJ -"As She's Walking Away", by Zac Brown Band -"Austin", by Blake Shelton -"A Woman Like You", by Lee Brice -"B.Y.O.B.", by System Of A Down -"Babel", by Mumford & Sons -"Baby Girl", by Sugarland -"Back where I Come From", by Kenny Chesney -"Backwoods", by Justin Moore -"Bad Bad Things", by AJJ -"Bad Blood", by Creature Feature -"Bad Guy", by 3OH!3 -"Bad Moon Rising", by Creedence Clearwater Revival -"Bait a Hook", by Justin Moore -"Bald Butte", by Colter Wall -"Bareback Jack", by Chris Ledoux -"Basket Case", by Greenday -"Battle Scars", by Paradise Fears -"Battleships", by Daughtry -"Be Calm", by Fun. -"Beekeeper", by Keaton Henson -"Beer for my Horses", by Toby Keith -"Beer in Mexico", by Kenny Chesney -"Before He Cheats", by Carrie Underwood -"Begin Again", by Taylor Swift -"Believer", by American Authors -"Believer", by Imagine Dragons -"Be Nice to Me", by The Front Bottoms -"Bernadette", by IAMX -"Best Day of my Life", by American Authors -"Best of You", by Foo Fighters -"Better in the Morning", by Birdtalker -"Between the Bars", by Elliott Smith -"Between the Lines", by Chuck Ragan -"Beverly Hills", by Weezer -"Big Bird", by AJJ -"Big Burned Hand", by Iron & Wine -"Big Houses", by Squalloscope -"Big Iron", by Marty Robbins -"Bill & Annie", by Chuck Brodsky -"Bird Song", by Florence + the Machine -"Birds With Broken Wings", by Ben Caplan -"Birthday (Alligators and Pretzel Makers)", by Lemon Demon -"Bittersweet", by Panic! at the Disco -"Blackbird", by the Beatles -"Black Cat", by Never Shout Never -"Black Dog", by AJJ -"Black Dog", by Janita Jenny Haan -"Black Eyes", by David Wirsig -"Black Friday Rule", by Flogging Molly -"Black Sheep", by Metric -"Black Sheep Boy", by Tim Hardin -"Black Wave (Bad Vibrations)", by Arcade Fire -"Blasphemous Rumours", by Depeche Mode -"Bless the Broken Road", by Rascal Flatts -"Blindness", by Metric -"Blister in the Sun", by Violent Femmes -"Blood", by my Chemical Romance -"Blood // Water", by Grandson -"Blood and Whiskey", by The Mechanisms -"Blood on my Name", by Brothers Bright -"Blowin' Smoke", by Kacey Musgraves -"Blue Lips", by Regina Spektor -"Body Terror Song", by AJJ -"Bohemian Rhapsody", by Queen -"Bones", by Ms Mr -"Boulevard of Broken Dreams", by Green Day -"Boys 'Round Here", by Blake Shelton -"Boys will be Bugs", by Cavetown -"Braille", by Regina Spektor -"Brand New City", by Mitski -"Brave", by Sara Bareilles -"Brave As a Noun", by AJJ -"Breakaway", by Kelly Clarkson -"Breakfast At Tiffany's", by Deep Blue Something -"Bright", by Echosmith -"Broken Crown", by Mumford & Sons -"Broken Halos", by Chris Stapleton -"Broken Horses", by The Mechanisms -"Broom People", by The Mountain Goats -"Brothers", by Vic Mignogna -"Bruno is Orange", by Hop Along (feat. Queen Ansleis) -"Brutus", by The Buttress -"Bubbly", by Colbie Caillat -"Built for Sin", by Framing Hanley -"Bullet", by Hollywood Undead -"Bullet with Butterfly Wings", by Smashing Pumpkins -"Bully", by Shinedown -"Burn Him Down", by Kitsch Club -"Burning Gold", by Christina Perri -"Burning House", by Cam -"Bury a Friend", by Billie Eilish -"Bury Me Face Down", by Grandson -"Business Man", by Mother Mother -"Bust Your Knee Caps", by Pomplamoose -"C'mon", by Panic! At the Disco (with Fun) -"Cabinet Man", by Lemon Demon -"Cadillac Jack Favor", by Clint Black -"Cain", by Cousin Marnie -"Cairo", by San Fermin -"California Burritos", by Chuck Ragan -"Callin' Baton Rouge", by Garth Brooks -"Candy Jail", by Silver Jews -"Car Radio", by Twenty One Pilots -"Carry On", by Fun. -"Castle", by Halsey -"Castle of Glass", by Linkin Park -"Cat's in the Cradle", by Harry Chapin -"Catabolic Seed", by The Scary Jokes -"Catch Fire", by Jenix -"Cathy's Clown", by The Everly Brothers -"Caught Like a Fly", by Falling in Reverse -"Cecilia and the Satellite", by Andrew McMahon -"Celebrity", by Brad Paisley -"Centuries", by Fall Out Boy -"Champagne Supernova", by Oasis -"Change the Formality", by Infected Mushroom -"Charlie's Inferno", by That Handsome Devil -"Check Yes Or No", by George Strait -"Chicken Fried", by Zac Brown Band -"Children of God", by AJJ -"Choke", by I Don't Know How But They Found Me -"Chop Suey!", by System of a Down -"Christmas Island", by AJJ -"Christmas Kids", by ROAR -"Circle", by Mitski -"Clay Pigeons", by Blaze Foley -"Cleaning This Gun", by Rodney Atkins -"Cleopatra", by The Lumineers -"Clint Eastwood", by Gorillaz -"Clocks", by Coldplay -"Closer", by the Tiny -"Code Name Raven", by House of Heroes -"Coin for the Ferryman", by Nickelback -"Colder Weather", by Zac Brown Band -"Cold Hearted", by Zac Brown Band -"Cold One", by Eric Church -"Come a Little Bit Closer", by Jay and the Americans -"Come Along", by Cosmo Sheldrake -"Come With Me Now", by Kongos -"Coming Home, Part II", by Skylar Grey -"Compass", by Lady Antebellum -"Control", by Halsey -"Cooler Than Me", by Mike Posner -"Cool Kids", by Echosmith -"Copperhead Road", by Steve Earle -"Counting Bodies Like Sheep", by A Perfect Circle -"Counting Stars", by OneRepublic -"Country Folks can Survive", by Hank Williams Jr. -"Country Must Be Country Wide", by Brantley Gilbert -"Country State of Mind", by Hank Williams Jr. -"Courtesy of the Red, White and Blue", by Toby Keith -"Coward Till the End?", by Julian Lennon -"Cowboy Casanova", by Carrie Underwood -"Coyotes", by Don Edwards -"Coyotes", by Modest Mouse -"Cradles", by Sub Urban -"Crazy = Genius", by Panic! at the Disco -"Criminal", by Britney Spears -"Cups (You're Gonna Miss Me)", by Lulu and the Lampshades -"D-I-V-O-R-C-E", by Tammy Wynette -"Dance Music", by The Mountain Goats -"Dancing with the Devil", by Set It Off -"Danny Boy", by Celtic Woman -"Dare You To Move", by Switchfoot -"Dawn's Highway", by The 69 Eyes -"Dead Girl Walking (Reprise)", by Heathers -"Dead Hearts", by Stars -"Dear Daphne", by Clara C -"Dear Fellow Traveler", by Sea Wolf -"Dear God", by XTC -"Deathbed", by Relient K -"Deathlessness", by AJJ -"Death of a Bachelor", by Panic! at the Disco -"Death Valley Queen", by Flogging Molly -"Demons", by Imagine Dragons -"Despite What You've Been Told", by Two Gallants -"Deuteronomy 2:10", by The Mountain Goats -"Devil's Dance Floor", by Flogging Molly -"Devil's Right Hand", by Johnny Cash -"Devil's Train", by The Lab Rats -"Different Kind of Fine", by Zac Brown Band -"Dilaudid", by The Mountain Goats -"Dinu Lipatti's Bones", by The Mountain Goats -"Dirt Road Anthem", by Jason Aldean -"Dirty Night Clowns", by Chris Garneau -"Dirty Paws", by Of Monsters and Men -"Disenchanted", by My Chemical Romance -"Disturbia", by Rihanna -"Divine Comedy", by Sanguinarius -"Dog Days Are Over", by Florence + the Machine -"Dog Teeth", by Nicole Dollanganger -"Doin' What She Likes", by Blake Shelton -"Don't Blink", by Kenny Chesney -"Don't Come Knocking", by Holy Locust -"Don't Cry", by Chuck Ragan -"Don't Get In My Way", by Zack Hemsey -"Don't Mess With Me", by Temposhark -"Don't Panic", by Coldplay -"Don't Take the Girl", by Tim McGraw -"Don't Threaten Me with a Good Time", by Panic! at the Disco -"DONE.", by Band Perry -"Doubt", by Twenty One Pilots -"Down on the Farm", by Tim McGraw -"Downpour Intro", by Jonathan Davis -"Down to the Honkeytonk", by Jake Owen -"Do You Hear the People Sing?", by Les Miserables Cast -"Do You Pray", by Chuck Ragan -"Draft Dodger Rag", by Phil Ochs -"Dream", by Priscilla Ahn -"Drink a Beer", by Luke Bryan -"Drunken Lullabies", by Flogging Molly -"Drunk Last Night", by Eli Young Band -"Dust Bowl Dance", by Mumford & Sons -"East Bound and Down", by Jerry Reed -"Easy", by Son Lux -"Echo", by Jason Walker -"Eet", by Regina Spektor -"Emperor's New Clothes"', by Panic! at the Disco -"ES", by Crying -"Evelyn Evelyn", by Evelyn Evelyn -"Even If It Breaks Your Heart", by Eli Young Band -"Ever After", by Marianas Trench -"Everybody Knows", by Leonard Cohen -"Every Rose Has Its Thorn", by Poison -"Everything's Not Lost", by Coldplay -"Everything Has Changed", by Taylor Swift -"Evil Ways", by Blues Saraceno -"Exile Vilify", by The National -"Exxus", by Glass Animals -"Eye of the Tiger", by Survivor -"Eyes Down", by Eels -"Face Down", by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus -"Fading All Away", by AJJ -"Falling in Love with Your Best Friend", by Paul Baribeau -"Family Tradition", by Hank Williams Jr. -"Famous People", by Brad Paisley -"Fastest Girl in Town", by Miranda Lambert -"Father of Mine", by Everclear -"Fear & Delight", by The Correspondents -"Feed the Machine", by Nickelback -"Feeling Mean", by Ben Bostick -"Feelings are Fatal", by mxmtoon -"Fighter", by Christina Aguilera -"Fine, Great", by Modern Baseball -"Fire", by Noah Gundersen -"Fireflies", by Owl City -"Fix You", by Coldplay -"Flagpole Sitta", by Harvey Danger -"Flawed Design", by Stabilo -"Float", by Flogging Molly -"Fly", by Maddie & Tae -"Flyin' Down a Dirt Road", by Justin Moore -"Folsom Prison Blues", by Johnny Cash -"For Broken Ears", by Chuck Ragan -"Forest", by Twenty One Pilots -"Forget It", by Breaking Benjamin -"For What It's Worth", by Buffalo Springfield -"Free", by Zac Brown Band -"Free and Easy Down the Road I Go", by Dierks Bentley -"Free Bird", by AJJ -"Friends in Low Places", by Garth Brooks -"Funhouse", by P!nk -"Gasoline", by Halsey -"Geronimo", by Sheppard -"Get Free", by Major Lazer -"Get Out Alive", by Three Days Grace -"Ghost", by Halsey -"Ghost Riders in the Sky", by Johnny Cash -"Giants", by Bear Hands -"Gimme Back my Bullets", by Lynyrd Skynyrd -"Gimme Three Steps", by Lynyrd Skynyrd -"Girls", by Marina & the Diamonds -"Give Me Back my Hometown", by Eric Church -"Gives You Hell", by The All-American Rejects -"Glitter & Gold", by Barns Courtney -"God & Guns", by Lynyrd Skynyrd -"God's Gonna Cut You Down", by Johnny Cash -"God Bless the USA", by Lee Greenwood -"God Gave Me You", by Blake Shelton -"Go Get Your Gun", by The Dear Hunter -"Gold", by Imagine Dragons -"Gone, Gone, Gone", by Phillip Phillips -"Goodbye, Oh Goodbye", by AJJ -"Goodbye Earl", by Dixie Chicks -"Goodbye in Her Eyes", by Zac Brown Band -"Goodbye Mr. A", by The Hoosiers -"Good Country Song", by Blake Shelton -"Good Directions", by Billy Currington -"Good Girl", by Carrie Underwood -"Good Morning, Hypocrite", by Electric President -"Good Ole Boys", by Blake Shelton -"Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)", by Green Day -"Good Ride Cowboy", by Garth Brooks -"Good To Go To Mexico", by Toby Keith -"Granddaddy's Gun", by Aaron Lewis -"Grandpa", by Justin Moore -"Great Day", by The Lonely Island -"Growing Up Is Getting Old", by Jason Michael -"Guilty All the Same", by Linkin Park -"Guilty by Association Blues", by Danny Schmidt -"Gunpowder & Lead", by Miranda Lambert -"Gunpowder Tim vs. The Moon Kaiser", by The Mechanisms -"Guns", by Justin Moore -"Gurt Dog", by Faustus -"Hallelujah", by Leonard Cohen -"Handlebars", by Flobots -"Hand Me My Shovel, I’m Going In!", by Will Wood and the Tapeworms -"Handsome", by The Vaccines -"Happy", by Never Shout Never -"Happy Pills", by Weathers -"Harlem Roulette", by The Mountain Goats -"Harmony Hall", by Vampire Weekend -"Harper Valley P.T.A.", by Jeannie C. Riley -"Hast Thou Considered the Tetrapod", by The Mountain Goats -"Hate Song for Brains", by AJJ -"Have You Ever Seen The Rain?", by Creedence Clearwater Revival -"Head Like a Hole", by Nine Inch Nails -"Heartache Tonight", by Eagles -"Heartbreaker", by Pat Benatar -"Hearts of Stone", by Chuck Ragan -"Heavydirtysoul", by Twenty One Pilots -"Heavy is the Head", by Zac Brown Band -"He Didn't Have To Be", by Brad Paisley -"Heist", by Ben Folds -"Hell's Comin' with Me", by Poor Man's Poison -"Hello", by Evanescence -"Hello, I Love You", by The Doors -"Hello Darlin'", by Conway Twitty -"Hell On Heels", by Pistol Annies -"Hell Yeah", by Montgomery Gentry -"Here Before", by Vashti Bunyan -"Here for a Good Time", by George Strait -"Here for the Party", by Gretchen Wilson -"He Stopped Loving Her Today", by George Jones -"Hey, Good Lookin'", by Hank Williams -"Hey, Soul Sister", by Train -"Hey Ho on the Devil's Back", by Katzenjammer -"Hey There Delilah", by Plain White T's -"High", by Young Rising -"Highway 20 Ride", by Zac Brown Band -"Highway Don't Care", by Tim McGraw -"Highwayman", by Johnny Cash -"Hillbilly Bone", by Blake Shelton (feat. Trace Adkins) -"Holiday", by Green Day -"Holland, 1945", by Neutral Milk Hotel -"Hollow", by Cloudeater -"Hollow Moon", by Awolnation -"Holy", by PVRIS -"Home", by Edward Sharpe and The Magnetic Zeros -"Home", by Phillip Phillips -"Homesick", by Radical Face -"Honey Bee", by Blake Shelton -"Hotel California", by Eagles -"House of Memories", by Panic! at the Disco -"How", by The Neighbourhood -"How Do You Like Me Now", by Toby Keith -"How Far We've Come", by Matchbox 20 -"How Forever Feels", by Kenny Chesney -"How To Save a Life", by The Fray -"How Will I Rest In Peace If I'm Buried By a Highway?", by KennyHoopla -"Human", by Rag'n'Bone Man -"Human", by The Killers -"Hungry Dog in the Street", by The Taxpayers -"Hunting Song", by Tom Lehrer -"Hurt", by Nine Inch Nails -"I'll Always Love You (In my Own Crazy Way)", by Johnny Cash -"I'll Be There", by Josh Turner -"I'll Never Get Out of This World Alive", by Hank Williams -"I'm Alive", by Kenny Chesney -"I'm Always Walking as Somebody Else", by American Murder Song -"I'm Gettin' Stoned", by Eric Church -"I'm Gonna Be Somebody", by Travis Tritt -"I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry", by Hank Williams -"I'm So Sorry", by Imagine Dragons -"I'm Yours", by Jason Mraz -"I Am Not a Robot", by Marina & the Diamonds -"I Am Shit", by Crywank -"I Can Still Make Cheyenne", by George Strait -"Icarus", by Bastille -"I Don't Love You", by My Chemical Romance -"I Don't Want To Be", by Gavin Degraw -"I Don't Want to Die", by The Unicorns -"If Everyone Cared", by Nickelback -"If Heaven Ain't a Lot Like Dixie", by Hank Williams Jr. -"If Heaven Wasn't So Far Away", by Justin Moore -"If I Die Young", by The Band Perry -"If I Ever Leave This World Alive", by Flogging Molly -"If I I Had a Million Dollars", by Barenaked Ladies -"If Only", by Holes Soundtrack -"I Fought the Law", by The Clash -"If You're Going Through Hell", by Rodney Atkins -"If You're Reading This", by Tim McGraw -"If You Could See Me Now", by The Script -"If You Don't Like my Twang", by Justin Moore -"If You Ever Stop Loving Me", by Montgomery Gentry -"If You Have Love in Your Heart", by AJJ -"If You Knew", by Joel Faviere -"I Go Back", by Kenny Chesney -"I Got You", by Thompson Square -"I Hate Love Songs", by Kelsea Ballerini -"I Hope You Dance", by Lee Ann Womack -"I Knew You Were Trouble", by Taylor Swift -"I Know I'm a Wolf", by Young Heretics -"I Like It, I Love It", by Tim McGraw -"I Love It", by Icona Pop (feat. Charli XCX) -"I Love This Bar", by Toby Keith -"I Miss You", by Blink-182 -"Immigrant Song", by Led Zepplin -"Infamous Butcher", by Amigo the Devil -"Infinitesimal", by Mother Mother -"Infra-Red", by Placebo -"In Our Bedroom After the War", by Stars -"Inside Out", by Eve 6 -"Insomnia", by Electric President -"In the End", by Linkin Park -"In the Pines", by Danny Farrant and Paul Rawson -"In the Valley of the Dying Sun", by House of Heroes -"Into the Woods", by Cilla Jane -"I Play the Road", by Zac Brown Band -"Iris", by Goo Goo Dolls -"Iron Man", by Black Sabbath -"I Saw the Dead", by Villagers -"I Saw the Light", by Hank Williams -"Iscariot", by Walk the Moon -"Island Song", by Ashley Eriksson -"It's a Great Day to be Alive", by Travis Tritt -"It's All Futile! It's All Pointless!", by Wilbur Soot -"It's an Ugly Life", by Electric President -"It's Five O'Clock Somewhere", by Jimmy Buffett (feat. Alan Jackson) -"It's Not Ok", by Zac Brown Band -"It's the End of the World as we Know It (And I Feel Fine)", by R.E.M. -"It's Time", by Imagine Dragons -"It's What You Will", by Chuck Ragan -"It Ain't My Fault", by Brothers Osborne -"It Can Get Lonely in My Mansion", by Lemon Demon -"It Happens", by Sugarland -"It Took me By Surprise", by Maria Mena -"I Walk the Line", by Johnny Cash -"I Wanna Talk About Me", by Toby Keith -"I Will Always Love You", by Dolly Parton -"I Will Follow You into the Dark", by Death Cab for Cutie -"I Will Not Bow", by Breaking Benjamin -"I Will Survive", by Stephanie Bentley -"I Will Wait", by Mumford & Sons -"I Won't Back Down", by Johnny Cash -"I Won't Give Up", by Jason Mraz -"I Won't Let Go", by Rascal Flatts -"I Wouldn't Mind", by He Is We -"I Write Sins Not Tragedies", by Panic! At the Disco -"Jackie and Wilson", by Hozier -"Jar of Hearts", by Christina Perri -"Jekyll & Hyde", by Jonathan Thulin -"Jekyll And Hyde", by Five Finger Death Punch -"Jerusalem", by Dan Bern -"Jesus Saves", by AJJ -"Johnny", by American Murder Song -"Jolene", by Dolly Parton -"Jolene", by Ray Lamontagne -"July", by American Murder Song -"Jumper", by Third Eye Blind -"Jump Right In", by Zac Brown Band -"Just a Girl", by No Doubt -"Just a Kiss", by Lady Antebellum -"Just Give Me a Reason", by P!nk (feat. Nate Ruess) -"Justice", by Everything Everything -"Just Like Old Times", by Todd Snider -"Just the Past", by Peter Bjorn & John -"Just the Way You Are", by Bruno Mars -"Karma Slave", by Splashdown -"Kaw-liga", by Hank Williams -"Keep Me in Mind", by Zac Brown Band -"Keep Your Head Up", by Andy Grammer -"Kids", by MGMT -"Killer in the Mirror", by Set It Off -"Kill of the Night", by Gin Wigmore -"Kill the Lights", by The Birthday Massacre -"Kill Your Heroes", by AwolNation -"King", by Lauren Aquilina -"Kiss It All Better", by He Is We -"Kiss my Country Ass", by Blake Shelton -"Kitchen Fork", by Jack Conte -"Knee Deep", by Zac Brown Band -"Kokopelli Face Tattoo", by AJJ -"Kryptonite", by 3 Doors Down -"L'il Red Riding Hood", by Amanda Seyfried -"LA Devotee", by Panic! at the Disco -"Lady Liberty", by AJJ -"La Habanera", by Carmen -"Land of Broken Promises", by IAMX -"Landslide", by Dixie Chicks (originally by Stevie Nicks) -"Last Dollar (Fly Away)", by Tim McGraw -"Laughed Until We Cried", by Jason Aldean -"Lemon Boy", by Cavetown -"Less of Me", by Until I Wake -"Lethal Temptress", by The Mendoza Line -"Let Her Go", by Passenger -"Let It Go", by Zac Brown Band -"Let It Rain", by Jason Michael -"Let It Rain", by Zac Brown Band -"Letter To Me", by Brad Paisley -"Liar", by Mumford & Sons -"Life is a Highway", by Rascal Flatts -"Lights", by Ellie Goulding -"Lights are Going Out", by Nomy -"Like a River Runs", by Bleachers -"Like a Staring Contest", by The Future Kings of Nowhere -"Linda Rondstadt", by AJJ -"Lion's Teeth", by The Mountain Goats -"Lions Roar", by The Hush Sound -"Listen to Me", by Human Petting Zoo -"Lithium", by Nirvana -"Little Bit of Everything", by Keith Urban -"Little Game", by Benny -"Little Lion Man", by Mumford & Sons -"Little Pistol", by Mother Mother -"Little Talks", by Of Monsters and Men -"Little Toy Guns", by Carrie Underwood -"Little White Church", by Little Big Town -"Live Like You Were Dying'", by Tim McGraw -"Long Haired Redneck", by David Allen Coe -"Look Away", by The Dear Hunter -"Look How Far We've Come", by Imagine Dragons -"Lord Anthony", by Belle and Sebastian -"Lost Highway", by Hank Williams -"Lost In The Supermarket", by The Clash -"Lost Sol", by Sanguinarius -"Lotta True Crime", Penelope Scott -"Louder Than Thunder", by The Devil Wears Prada -"Love", by Jana Kramer -"Loved", by Fein -"Love In The Time Of Human Papillomavirus", by AJJ -"Love Like Crazy", by Lee Brice -"Love Like You", by Rebecca Sugar -"Love Love Love", by The Mountain Goats -"Lovely Thing Suite: Conversations", by Watsky -"Lovely Thing Suite: Knots", by Watsky -"Lovely Thing Suite: Roses", by Watsky -"Lover's Eyes", by Mumford & Sons -"Love Story", by Taylor Swift -"Love the Way You Lie", by Eminem -"Love the Way You Lie (part II)", by Rihanna -"Love The Way You Lie, (part III)", by Skylar Grey -"Lovin' Me Anyway", by Eric Church -"Lovin' You Is Fun", by Easton Corbin -"Lucky Man", by Montgomery Gentry -"Lullaby Bye", by Dr. Steel -"Machine", by Regina Spektor -"Made in America", by Toby Keith -"Mad World", by Gary Jules -"Magic Key", by One-T -"Magpie", by The Mountain Goats -"Make a Move", by Icon for Hire -"Make This Day", by Zac Brown Band -"Mama", by My Chemical Romance -"Mama's Broken Heart", by Miranda Lambert -"Mama Tried", by Merle Haggard -"Marked Man", by Mieka Pauley -"Marshal Dear", by Savages -"Masterpiece Theatre III", by Marianas Trench -"Matches", by Sifu Hotman -"Matthew 25:21", by The Mountain Goats -"McGreggor", by Elbow -"Mean", by Taylor Swift -"Me and Mine", by The Brothers Bright -"Mean to Me", by Brett Eldredge -"Meanwhile Back At Mama's", by Tim McGraw & Faith Hill -"Meow Meow Lullaby", by Nada Surf -"Message Man", by Twenty One Pilots -"Mess is Mine", by Vance Joy -"Middle Fingers", by Missio -"Middle of Somewhere", by The Neighborhood -"Midnight Rider", by The Allman Brothers Band -"Might Not Like Me", by Brynn Elliott -"Migraine", by Twenty One Pilots -"Millstone", by Brand New -"Mine Would Be You", by Blake Shelton -"Miss Jackson", by Panic! at the Disco -"Moments", by Emerson Drive -"Monster", by Imagine Dragons -"Monster", by Meg & Dia -"Monster", by Paramore -"Monster", by Skillet -"Monster", by Starset -"Mountains", by Radical Face -"Move (Keep Walkin')", by TobyMac -"Mr. Brightside", by The Killers -"Mr Loverman", by Ricky Montgomery -"Mud on the Tires", by Brad Paisley -"Must be Nice", by Nickelback -"Must Have Been The Wind", by Alec Benjamin -"My Demons", by Starset -"My Front Porch Lookin In", by Lonestar -"My Least Favorite Life", by Lera Lynn -"My Mom", by Kimya Dawson -"My Neck of the Woods", by Blake Shelton -"My Next Thirty Years", by Tim McGraw -"My Ordinary Life", by The Living Tombstone -"My Own Worst Enemy", by Lit -"My Songs Know What You Did in the Dark", by Fall Out Boy -"Na Na Na", by My Chemical Romance -"Natural", by Imagine Dragons -"Need You Now", by Lady Antebellum -"Neon Light", by Blake Shelton -"Neptune", by Sleeping at Last -"Never Gonna Get Away", by The Cog is Dead -"Never Really Good at Sports", by Sledding with Tigers -"New Americana", by Halsey -"New Divide", by Linkin Park -"Next To Me", by Emeli Sande -"Night of the Hunter", by 30 Seconds to Mars -"No Bravery", by James Blunt -"No Children", by The Mountain Goats -"No Church in the Wild", by Kanye West & Jay-Z -"No Happy Ending", by The Mechanisms -"No Hurry", by Zac Brown Band -"No Light, No Light", by Florence and the Machine -"No More Shame, No More Fear, No More Dread", by AJJ -"No One's Here To Sleep", by Naughty Boy (ft. Bastille) -"No Rain", by Blind Melon -"Normalization Blues", by AJJ -"No Roots", by Alice Merton -"Nothing Left to Say", by Imagine Dragons -"Nothing Without Love", by Nate Ruess -"Now that I'm at the Top of My Game", by AJJ -"O' Death", by Jen Titus -"Ode to Sleep", by Twenty One Pilots -"Oh Ana", by Mother Mother -"Oh Darling, What Have I Done", by The White Buffalo -"Oh No", by Marina & the Diamonds -"Oh What A World", by Rufus Wainwright -"Ol' Red", by Blake Shelton -"Old Alabama", by Brad Paisley -"Old Back in the New School", by Justin Moore -"Olde(y) Tyme(y)", by AJJ -"Once In A Lifetime", by Talking Heads -"One for the Money", by Escape the Fate -"One Hell of an Amen", by Brantley Gilbert -"One of Those Lives", by Brad Paisley -"One Piece at a Time", by Johnny Cash -"Only Everyone Can Judge Me", by Crywank -"Ontario Gothic", by Foxes in Fiction -"Our Song", by Taylor Swift -"Outlaw Song", by 16 Horsepower -"Outside", by Staind -"Over my Head (Cable Car)", by The Fray -"Overtime", by Brika -"Over When It's Over", by Eric Church -"Over You", by Miranda Lambert -"Pagan Angel & A Borrowed Car", by Iron & Wine -"Pale Green Things", by The Mountain Goats -"Paper Planes", by M.I.A. -"Paper Scars", by Lovedrug -"Paradise", by Coldplay -"Paragon Of Order", by Owen Pallett -"Parrot", by Stepdad -"Payphone", by Maroon 5 -"Peace", by Shayfer James -"People", by AJJ -"People Are Crazy", by Billy Currington -"People II 2: Still Peoplin'?", by AJJ -"People II: The Reckoning", by AJJ -"Pepper", by Butthole Surfers -"Pet", by A Perfect Circle -"Phantom 309", by Red Sovine -"Photograph", by Ed Sheeran -"Photograph", by Nickelback -"Piano Man", by Billy Joel -"Picture To Burn", by Taylor Swift -"Pieces", by Gary Allan -"Plastic Soul", by This World Fair -"Play that Song", by Train -"Point at You", by Justin Moore -"Polarize", by Twenty One Pilots -"Pompeii", by Bastille -"Pork Soda", by Glass Animals -"Prayin' for Daylight", by Rascal Flatts -"Pressure", by Billy Joel -"Pretty Girl (The Way)", by Sugarcult -"Pretty Good At Drinkin' Beer", by Billy Currington -"Prison Grove", by Warren Zevon -"Professional Griefers", by Deadmau5 -"Prop Me up Beside the Jukebox (If I Die)", by Joe Diffie -"Providence", by Poor Man's Poison -"Putting the Dog To Sleep", by The Antlers -"Pyramid", by Jason Webley -"Quicksand", by David Bowie -"Quiet", by Lights -"Quiet as a Rat", by Amigo the Devil -"Quiet Your Mind", by Zac Brown Band -"R.I.P. Everyone", by JJ Demon -"Rabbit's Song", by S. J. Tucker -"Radioactive", by Imagine Dragons -"Ragged Old Flag", by Johnny Cash -"Raging Fire", by Phillip Phillips -"Rain is a Good Thing", by Luke Bryan -"Raise Your Glass", by P!nk -"Ramalama (Bang Bang)", by Roisin Murphy -"Rebels Of The Sacred Heart", by Flogging Molly -"Reckless (Still Growin' Up)", by Kip Moore -"Red Baron / Blue Max", by Iced Earth -"Redesign Your Logo", by Lemon Demon -"Redneck Side", by Justin Moore -"Red Right Hand", by Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds -"Red Solo Cup", by Toby Keith -"Red Stars", by The Birthday Massacre -"Rehab", by Amy Winehouse -"Reign of Love", by Coldplay -"Remedy", by Little Boots -"Remember the Name", by Fort Minor -"Renegade", by Styx -"Renegades", by X Ambassadors -"Requiem for a Dying Song", by Flogging Molly -"Response", by Barcelona -"Return of the Grievous Angel", by Gram Parsons -"Rhythm of Love", by Plain White T's -"Ring of Fire", by Johnny Cash -"Riot", by Three Days Grace -"Riptide", by Vance Joy -"Rise (Sing it Loud)", by Caroline Jones -"River Below", by Billy Talent -"Roads Untraveled", by Linkin Park -"Roar", by Katy Perry -"Rock 'N' Roll Lifestyle", by CAKE -"Rockin' The Suburbs (Over The Hedge Version)", by Ben Folds -"Rockstar", by Nickelback -"Rodeo", by Garth Brooks -"Roll Away Your Stone", by Mumford & Sons -"Rolling in the Deep", by Adele -"Rooster", by Alice in Chains -"Rose", by A Perfect Circle -"Round and Round", by 3 Doors Down -"Round and Round", by Imagine Dragons -"Round Here", by Florida Georgia Line -"Royalty", by Conor Maynard -"Rubik's Cube", by Athlete -"Rude", by Magic! -"Ruler of Everything", by Tally Hall -"Run Boy Run", by Woodkid -"Run Rabbit Run", by The Hoosiers -"Run To You", by Pentatonix -"Rät", by Penelope Scott -"Sad Songs", by AJJ -"Safe & Sound", by Taylor Swift (feat. The Civil Wars) -"Safe and Sound", by Capital Cities -"Safe and Sound", by Electric President -"Sail", by AwolNation -"Saint Bernard", by Lincoln -"Same Old Song", by Blake Shelton -"Sam Stone", by John Prine -"Santa Monica", by Everclear -"Santeria", by Sublime -"Satin in a Coffin", by Modest Mouse -"Savages", by Mariana & the Diamonds -"Sax Rohmer #1", by The Mountain Goats -"Scarborough Fair / Canticle", by Simon & Garfunkel -"Scar Tissue", by Red Hot Chili Peppers -"Scarves", by Tag! -"Secret", by The Pierces -"Sense, Sensibility", by AJJ -"Set Fire to the Rain", by Adele -"Setting Yourself up for Sarcasm", by Get Scared -"Settlin'", by Sugarland -"Seven Nation Army", by The White Stripes -"Shake It Out", by Florence + the Machine -"She's Country", by Jason Aldean -"She Keeps Me Warm", by Mary Lambert -"She Wouldn't Be Gone", by Blake Shelton -"Short Skirt / Long Jacket", by Cake -"Shout", by Tears for Fears -"Show Me Love", by t.A.T.u -"Show Your Fangs", by The Crane Wives -"Shut Eye", by Stealing Sheep -"Sic 'Em on a Chicken", by Zac Brown Band -"Silent Majority", by Nickelback -"Sinnerman", by Nina Simone -"Sinners", by Barns Courtney -"Sirens", by Hop Along, Queen Ansleis -"Skinny Love", by Bon Iver -"Sleep Walk", by Forrest Day -"Small Town USA", by Justin Moore -"Smashing the Opponent", by Infected Mushroom -"Smells Like Teen Spirit", by Nirvana -"Smoke a Little Smoke", by Eric Church -"Smokey Mountain Memories", by Earl Thomas Conley -"Sober", by P!nk -"So Long, Mom (A Song For World War III)", by Tom Lehrer -"Some Beach", by Blake Shelton -"Somebody that I Used to Know", by Gotye -"Some Nights", by Fun. -"Someone Like You", by Adele -"Somethin' Bad", by Miranda Lambert and Carrie Underwood -"Something's Gotta Give", by OneRepublic -"Something I Need", by OneRepublic -"Something in the Water", by Carrie Underwood -"Something Like That", by Tim McGraw -"Something to be Proud of", by Montgomery Gentry -"Somewhere Only We Know", by Keane -"Song for Dennis Brown", by The Mountain Goats -"Song for Someone", by U2 -"Soul Meets Body", by Death Cab for Cutie -"So What", by P!nk -"Spiderwebs", by No Doubt -"Spirits", by the Strumbellas -"Springsteen", by Eric Church -"Stabat Mater", by Woodkid -"Standard Deviation", by Danny Schmidt -"Stand by your Man", by Tammy Wynette -"Standing Outside the Fire", by Garth Brooks -"Starlight", by Muse -"Start a War", by Klergy -"Stay", by Rihanna -"Stay Young", by Strata -"Story of my Life", by One Direction -"Storytime", by Sanguinarius -"Straight to Hell", by Darius Rucker (ft. others) -"Strange Victory, Strange Defeat", by The Silver Jews -"Strawberry Blond", by Mitski -"Stray Italian Greyhound", by Vienna Teng -"Stressed Out", by Twenty One Pilots -"Stubborn Love", by The Lumineers -"Stuck Like Glue", by Sugarland -"Such Horrible Things", by Creature Feature -"Suds in the Bucket", by Sara Evans -"Sugar We're Goin' Down", by Fall Out Boy -"Superheroes", by The Script -"Survival Song", by AJJ -"Sweet Annie", by Zac Brown Band -"Sweet Home Alabama", by Lynyrd Skynyrd -"Sweet Tangerine", by The Hush Sound -"Symmetry", by Chuck Ragan -"Sympathy for the Devil", by The Rolling Stones -"Table Song", by Katie Kuffel -"Take a Back Road", by Rodney Atkins -"Take a Walk", by Passion Pit -"Take Me to Church", by Hozier -"Take Me to War", by The Crane Wives -"Takin' Pills", by Pistol Annies -"Tattoos on This Town", by Jason Aldean -"Teardrops on my Guitar", by Taylor Swift -"Tear in my Heart", by Twenty One Pilots -"Tears of an Angel", by RyanDan -"Tea With Cinnamon", by Katzenjammer -"Teenagers", by My Chemical Romance -"Tell Me Why", by Neil Young -"Terrible Things", by April Smith & the Great Picture Show -"Terrible Things", by Mayday Parade -"Thanks for the Memories", by Fall Out Boy -"That's How Country Boys Roll", by Billy Currington -"That's What I Call Home", by Blake Shelton -"That's What I Love About Sunday", by Craig Morgan -"The Air Force Song", by Robert Crawford -"The Angel of Death", by Hank Williams -"The Archers Bows have Broken", by Brand New -"The Artist", by The Hush Sound -"The A Team", by Ed Sheeran -"The Ballad of Love and Hate", by The Avett Brothers -"The Beaches of Cheyenne", by Garth Brooks -"The Beautiful People", by Marilyn Manson -"The Beer", by Kimya Dawson -"The Bird and the Worm", by The Used -"The Call", by Regina Spektor -"The Cave", by Mumford & Sons -"The Changeling", by Merrigan -"The Cigar Song", by Tim McGraw -"The Comedienne", by Parenthetical Girls -"The Contrarian", by A Perfect Circle -"The Cowboy's Song", by Don Edwards -"The Cowboy in Me", by Tim McGraw -"The Daughter of the Fish and the Ram", by The Scary Jokes -"The Devil Wears a Suit and Tie", by Colter Wall -"The Devil Went Down To Georgia", by Charlie Daniels Band -"The Diary of Jane", by Breaking Benjamin -"The Distance", by Cake -"The Final Cut", by AJJ -"The Fool", by Lee Ann Womack -"The Freshmen", by The Verve Pipe -"The Gambler", by Fun. -"The Gambler", by Kenny Rogers -"The Game of Life", by Jubyphonic -"The Good, the Bad and the Dirty", by Panic! at the Disco -"The Greatest Show Unearthed", by Creature Feature -"The Grove", by Chuck Ragan -"The Hand That Feeds", by Nine Inch Nails -"The House That Built Me", by Miranda Lambert -"The Ignominious Demise of Dr. Pilchard", by The Mechanisms -"The Joker", by The Steve Miller Band -"The Judge", by Twenty One Pilots -"The Kids Aren't Alright", by the Offspring -"The Kill", by 30 Seconds To Mars -"The Last Country Song", by Blake Shelton -"The Likes of You Again", by Flogging Molly -"The Lion and the Wolf", by Thrice -"The Lonely", by Christina Perri -"The Man Comes Around", by Johnny Cash -"The Masochism Tango", by Tom Lehrer -"Theme from a NOFX Album", by NOFX -"The Mercy Seat", by Johnny Cash -"The Michael Jordan Of Drunk Driving", by AJJ -"The Middle", by Jimmy Eat World -"The Mind Electric", by Miracle Musical -"The Monster", by Eminem -"The Moss", by Cosmo Sheldrake -"The Night the Lights Went Out in Georgia", by Reba McEntire -"The Noose", by A Perfect Circle -"The Old Country Church", by Hank Williams -"The Only Exception", by Paramore -"The Only Way I Know", by Jason Aldean -"The Other Side of Paradise", by Glass Animals -"The Phoenix", by Fall Out Boy -"The Pretender", by Foo Fighters -"There's a Ghost", by Fleurie -"There's a Tear in my Beer", by Hank Williams -"The Rhyme", by Scratch21 -"The Scientist", by Coldplay -"These Boots", by Eric Church -"These Few Presidents", by Why? -"The Seven Deadly Sins", by Flogging Molly -"The Sound of Silence", by Simon & Garfunkel -"The Thunder Rolls", by Garth Brooks -"The Underdog", by Spoon -"The Valley", by The Oh Hellos -"The Violence", by Rise Against -"The Wendy Trilogy I: Wendy on Board", by S.J. Tucker -"The Wendy Trilogy II: Red-handed Jill", by S.J. Tucker -"The Wendy Trilogy III: Green-Eyed Sue (Sue's Jig)", by S.J. Tucker -"The Wolf", by Mumford & Sons -"The Words", by Christina Perri -"The World", by Brad Paisley -"The World Ender", by Lord Huron -"The World Is Black", by Good Charlotte -"The Yawning Grave", by Lord Huron -"Thinking Out Loud", by Ed Sheeran -"This Cowboy's Hat", by Chris Ledoux -"This Is Country Music", by Brad Paisley -"This Is Gospel", by Panic! at the Disco -"This is Home", by Cavetown -"This Isn't The End", by Owl City -"This is Only a Test", by Pennywise -"This Is War", by 30 Seconds To Mars -"This Love, This Hate", by Hollywood Undead -"This One", by Snowmine -"Thistle & Weeds", by Mumford & Sons -"This Too Shall Pass", by Danny Schmidt -"This Year", by The Mountain Goats -"Those Days are Gone and My Heart is Breaking", by Barton Carroll -"Thunderhead", by The Native Howl -"Tic Toc", by Mother Mother -"Til The Last Shot's Fired", by Trace Adkins -"Time Marches On", by Tracy Lawrence -"Time of Dying", by Three Days Grace -"Toba the Tura", by Forgive Durden -"Toes", by Zac Brown Band -"TOEWGMO", by McCafferty -"Tomorrow", by Chris Young -"Tongues & Teeth", by The Crane Wives -"To Noise Making (Sing)", by Hozier -"Toothbrush", by Brad Paisley -"Tornado", by Little Big Town -"Trampoline", by SHAED -"Transcendental Youth", by The Mountain Goats -"Treble Heart", by Anna Graceman -"Truckers Are The Blood", by AJJ -"Try", by Colbie Caillat -"Try", by P!nk -"Turn The Lights Off", by Tally Hall -"Twice", by Little Dragon -"Twin Sized Mattress", by The Front Bottoms -"Twist the Knife", by That Handsome Devil -"Two Birds", by Regina Spektor -"Two People Fell in Love", by Brad Paisley -"Two Pina Coladas", by Garth Brooks -"Typical Story", by Hobo Johnson -"Ugly", by Nicole Dollanganger -"Uncaged", by Zac Brown Band -"Under the Bridge", by Red Hot Chili Peppers -"Undo It", by Carrie Underwood -"Unfinished Business (White Lies)", by Mumford & Sons -"Unity", by TheFatRat -"Unsteady", by X Ambassadors -"Uprising", by Muse -"Up the Wolves", by The Mountain Goats -"Venus Ambassador", by Bryan Scary -"Via Chicago", by Wilco -"Victorious", by Panic! at the Disco -"Video Games", by Lana Del Rey -"Villain", by Nightcore -"Villainous Thing", by Shayfer James -"Viva la Gloria (Little Girl)", by Green Day -"Viva la Vida", by Coldplay -"Vladimir Grutsov", by Eleanoora Rosenholm -"Volatile Times", by IAMX -"Wagon Wheel", by Darius Rucker -"Waitin' on a Woman", by Brad Paisley -"Wake Me Up", by Avicii -"Wake Me Up When September Ends", by Green Day -"Walk the Line", by Johnny Cash -"Wallet", by Regina Spektor -"Wallflower", by CatchingYourClouds (feat. Johnnie Guilbert) -"Waltz #2 (XO)", by Elliott Smith -"Warning", by Green Day -"Warrior", by Ke$ha -"Wash Away", by Joe Purdy -"Wasteland, Baby!", by Hozier -"Watching You", by Rodney Atkins -"Watered Down", by The Used -"Watermelon Crawl", by Tracy Byrd -"Way Down We Go", by Kaleo -"We're Not Gonna Take It", by Twisted Sister -"We Are the Champions", by Queen -"We Are the Enemy", by Aranda -"We Are Young", by Fun. -"Weird Beard", by Mad Caddies -"Welcome to the Black Parade", by My Chemical Romance -"Welcome to the Circus", by Skittish -"Welcome to the Future", by Brad Paisley -"Well-Dressed", by Hop Along -"Werewolf Gimmick", by The Mountain Goats -"Wernher Von Braun", by Tom Lehrer -"We Shall All Die Alone Someday", by AJJ -"We Were Never Built To Last", by Electric President -"We Will All Go Together When We Go", by Tom Lehrer -"We Will Rock You", by Queen -"What's Left Of The Flag", by Flogging Molly -"What's Your Mama's Name, Child", by Tanya Tucker -"What are you Waiting for?", by Nickelback -"Whatever It Is", by Zac Brown Band -"Whatever It Takes", by Imagine Dragons -"What I've Done", by Linkin Park -"What I Got", by Sublime -"What Kinda Gone", by Chris Cagle -"What Was I Thinkin'", by Dierks Bentley -"What We Ain't Got", by Jake Owen -"When He Died", by Lemon Demon -"When I Come Around", by Green Day -"When I Get Where I'm Going", by Brad Paisley (feat. Dolly Parton) -"When Johnny Comes Marching Home", by Dolly Parton -"When the Day Met the Night", by Panic! at the Disco -"When the Sun Goes Down", by Kenny Chesney -"When You Were Young", by The Killers -"Where Did You Sleep Last Night", by Nirvana -"Where I'm From", by Jason Michael -"Where the Boat Leaves From", by Zac Brown Band -"Where the Green Grass Grows", by Tim McGraw -"Whiskey's Gone", by Zac Brown Band -"Whiskey Bent and Hell Bound", by Hank Williams Jr. -"Whiskey Lullaby", by Brad Paisley and Alison Krauss -"White Horse", by Taylor Swift -"White Liar", by Miranda Lambert -"Who's Gonna Stop Me?", by Portugal. The Man (feat. "Weird Al" Yankovic) -"Who's Next", by Tom Lehrer -"Who's Your Daddy?", by Toby Keith -"Who Are You When I'm Not Looking", by Blake Shelton -"Who Gets the Family Bible", by Rick Logan -"Who I Am With You", by Chris Young -"Who Knew", by P!nk -"Who We Are", by Imagine Dragons -"Why?", by Lily Allen -"Wildflower", by The Janedear Girls -"Willow Tree March", by The Paper Kites -"Wine Red", by The Hush Sound -"Winter Winds", by Mumford & Sons -"Wires", by The Neighbourhood -"Witches", by Blackbird Raum -"Wolf", by First Aid Kit -"Wolf in Sheep's Clothing", by Set it Off -"Wolves Without Teeth", by Of Monsters and Men -"World's Smallest Violin", by AJR -"World So Cold", by 12 Stones -"World So Cold", by Three Days Grace -"Would You Be Impressed?", by Streetlight Manifesto -"Write This Down", by George Strait -"Yeah Yeah Yeah (V2)", by Jack Conte -"Yellow", by Coldplay -"You", by Keaton Henson -"You're Dead", by Norma Tanega -"You're Gonna Go Far, Kid", by The Offspring -"You're Gonna Miss This", by Trace Adkins -"You're Somebody Else", by Flora Cash -"You Always Make Me Smile", by Kyle Andrews -"You and Me", by Lifehouse -"You Are the Moon", by The Hush Sound -"You Are the Sun", by Sara Groves -"You Belong With Me", by Taylor Swift -"You Could Be Happy", by Snow Patrol -"You Don't Know Me", by Ben Folds (feat. Regina Spektor) -"You Gonna Fly", by Keith Urban -"You Lie", by Band Perry -"Young", by Hollywood Undead -"Young God", by Halsey -"Young Volcanoes", by Fall Out Boy -"You or Your Memory", by The Mountain Goats -"You Oughta Know", by Alanis Morissette -"Your Cheatin' Heart", by Hank Williams -"Your Heart is a Muscle the Size of Your Fist", by Ramshackle Glory -"Your Song", by Elton John -"Your Voice, as I Remember It", by AJJ -"You Should See Me in a Crown", by Billie Eilish -"You Swan, Go On", by Mount Eerie -"Youth", by Daughter -"Youth of the Nation", by P.O.D. -"You Were Cool", by The Mountain Goats -"Zombie", by The Cranberries -"Zombie by the Cranberries", by AJJ

#Song #Music #Song list #My song list #My Post

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thesportssoundoff · 7 years ago

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“A Typical Fight Night From Europe”

Joey

July 10th, 2017

After a hectic, eventful and landscape changing International Fight Week you have approximately one week to get it all out of your system before everyone's favorite traveling circus heads overseas! Scotland has had one UFC event and now they better get ready for the UFC wackybus to roll back into town! The first event had a killer main and co-main and then some decent enough stuff under it. This card seems a bit deeper but not without some fluff as well. It's top three fights are fantastic stuff as the main event could be a potential title eliminator, it's co-main event is a really intriguing fight at strawweight and it's third fight is a slick lightweight clash between two guys who are more than capable of going on a run but dangerously close to falling behind in a crowded 155 lb picture. I think I've hammered on the "elite" stuff enough for one weekend. The rest of the card is essentially a very typical European card for what that's worth.

Fights: 12

Debuts: 6 (James Mulheron, Justin Willis, Galore Bofando, Danny Henry, Daniel Teymur, Amanda Lemos)

Fight Changes/Injury Cancellations: 3 (Mark Godbeer OUT, James Mulheron IN vs Justin Willis/Lina Lansberg OUT, Amanda Lemos IN vs Leslie Smith, Mitch Gagnon OUT, Albert Morales IN vs Brett Johns)

Headliners (fighters who have either main evented or co-main evented shows in the UFC): 3 (Gunnar Nelson, Santiago Ponzinibbio, Steven Ray)

Fighters On Losing Streaks in the UFC: 0

Fighters On Winning Streaks in the UFC: 4 (Steven Ray, Cynthia Cavillo, Santiago Ponzinibbio, Gunnar Nelson)

Stat Monitor for 2017:

Debuting Fighters (Current number: 16-18)- James Mulheron, Justin Willis, Galore Bofando, Danny Henry, Daniel Teymur, Amanda Lemos

Short Notice Fighters (Current number: 12-17)- Amanda Lemos, Albert Morales and James Mulheron

Second Fight (Current number: 20-19)- Charlie Ward, Brett Johns, Bobby Nash

Cage Corrosion (3-2)- Neil Seery

12 Precarious Ponderings:

1- There are going to be plenty of people disappointed in this main event on paper but let's be totally fair; this is a very acceptable Saturday afternoon main event in the middle of a rough Summer stretch of six events in a row. It's a respectable headliner featuring two WWs on winning streaks who could easily slip and slide their way towards a title shot. With Lawler/Cerrone happening and Masvidal/Wonderboy happening, that's four guys looking to fight through winning streaks. Maia vs Woodley is in two three weeks and then GSP "awaits" in November but I think we're all a hint smarter than that, am I right? So if there's a very impressive win, we might be looking at a new potential contender.

2- It's interesting to look at who each guy has beaten and realize that they've both kind of failed in their attempts to step up to the next level. Ponzinibbio was TKO'd by Lorenz Larkin in a really good fight whereas Nelson has lost to the likes of Rick Story and Demian Maia when asked to take a step up. Both are well rounded guys who have beaten fair competition (Ponzinibbio over guys like Sean Strickland, Nordine Taleb and Zack Cummings; Nelson over Alan Jouban, the aforementioned Cummings and Albert Tumenov). It's a very good stylistic matchup as well as Ponzinibbio's striking matches up well with Nelson's and while he lacks Nelson's grappling game, Santiago has great takedown defense. This is a good exciting fight that should be fun over five rounds.

3- Joanne Calderwood vs Cynthia Calvillo is one of those weird fights where a lot of bad outcomes could happen for the UFC. Calderwood seems destined to jump up to 125 lbs after this fight and so right off the bat, the big concern has to be that Calvillo loses to Calderwood who then goes up to 125 lbs and one of your more promising fresh prospects is left at 115 lbs with nowhere to go. On the other hand, it would probably kill the crowd entirely if Calderwood gets dominated by Calvillo.

4- Khalil Rountree vs Paul Craig is pretty interesting if you still think Rountree has potential. He's had 3 UFC fights and outside of getting smothered to death by a great wrestler, he's had a fight where he gave Tyson Pedro problems before his ground game fell apart and a fight where he almost removed Daniel Jolly from the realm of the living with a knee. Paul Craig likes to live in the clinch where there's plenty of danger from Rountree's knees. At the same time, if Craig takes the fight to the ground then tchances ar Rountree is going to have a very bad time.

5- Worth noting that Rountree and Craig are BOTH under 30 years old so we should want them to do well. Also holy shit let's do less of these under 30 fights at LHW and HW please?

6- Steven Ray going into this fight on the last fight of his deal. That's normally a sign of a guy having a breakout performance and then losing the NEXT fight right after it.

7- Paul Felder vs Steven Ray at range is going to be a lot of fun given how both guys tend to be hittable but can crack. Felder is more unorthodox but Ray's boxing can be really crisp plus both guys tend to be so-so takedown artists so expect a lot of power clinch work as well.

8- I don't want to say that it's shameless (because it's probably the kind of guy he should be fighting) but McGregor's buddy getting a dude with a 4-2 record who hasn't fought since 2015 is PEAK MMA. The very height of this stupid fun sport.

9- Danny Roberts gets a very serious gut check after losing vs Mike Perry. I don't know if he would've won a decision vs Perry but he had moments of brilliance in between getting rocked and eventually finished. Roberts is a fun welterweight to watch; an all offense all the time kind of guy who is susceptible and vulnerable in just about every passing second of a fight. Roberts is a work in progress for sure and Bobby Nash is the sort of wacky as fuck brawler with pop who can give him troubles. This could be a bonus earning fight.

10- Neil Seery's wacky amazing MMA journey comes to an end vs Alejandre Pantoja and I just wonder if maybe the UFC should've found an easier opponent for Seery.

11- In a crowded messy and talented 135 lb division, Brett Johns is one of those guys on the lower half just trying to find himself. Johns made a name for himself in good ways and bad on the regional circuit; a dude who vacated the CW title in a messy situation, missed weight in Titan FC and ultimately got to the UFC with questions about his commitment and focus. His debut was a great fight but not without some questions, primarily his cardio and his striking defense. Johns came into the UFC as a wrestle first desperation takedown guy but he showed even more in his debut. Albert Morales is the most athletic guy that Johns has faced but he has been prone to getting taken down in the past.

12- Really excited to see how the Teymur brother does. His brother has been a fantastic revelation for the UFC and might be Sweden's best chance for a champion going forward.

Must Win

Joanne Calderwood

The UFC clearly has had no problem letting people go recently. From releases to just not matching deals, they're skimming out people they deem excessive, expensive or headaches. At this point, Joanne Calderwood might fall more or less into the category of one of those three. She's getting Dana White's big pet project in Cynthia Calvillo who is 2-0 but hasn't fought anybody major of note. This is a decent enough stylistic matchup for Joanne Calderwood plus she's at home.

Steven Ray

Free agency looms for Mr. Ray and fighters are getting "paid" by somebody. Ray has a tough out in the versatile Paul Felder and he's proven to be a very durable 155er.

Khalil Rountree

You gotta imagine that at some point, Rountree has to make good on his promise and athletic upside. He's still very, very young in this division where age and staleness has taken over. Is his takedown defense improved? Has he rounded out the holes in his game? These are all key questions requiring serious answers. He's got a tough match up in Paul Craig who is a total stylistic crunch for him.

Five Fights You Can't Miss

1- Santiago Ponzinibbio vs Gunnar Nelson

It isn't often the case but the main event on this show is far and away the best fight on this card. Both are streaking WWs with a wealth of ability and in the case of Ponzinibbio, an interesting challenge for a very good Gunnar Nelson. Smarter people than I have discussed almost to an ungodly extent how the WW division is slowly aging and getting stagnant and these are two guys in their primes who are improving with each fight and fit a perfect spot for the WW division in need.

2- Brett Johns vs Albert Morales

I could just be really high up on Morales and overrating this newfound more aggressive Johns but I'm betting this fight is going to steal the show.

3- Joanne Calderwood vs Cynthia Calvillo

I'm pretty jacked for this one since there's so much at play. Cynthia Calvillo has real star potential and while the chance for Calderwood to be a "star" has come and gone, she's still a good strawweight who has flashes of greatness from time to time. Curious to see if Calvillo can get her down and even more curious of Calderwood's size will play a factor. There's a decent chance IMO that both women could fit for titles next year.

4- Khalil Rountree vs Paul Craig

Under 30 LHWs. Y'all need to be in on this.

5- Neil Seery vs Alexandre Pantoja

This should be a pretty interesting fight although I think it's going to be a bit of a bummer for Neil Seery fans. Seery's weaknesses have been against dominant grapplers and better athletes than he is. Pantoja touches both markets pretty easily and he's gone from being a very talented grappler to a solid striker as well. It's a damn good fight for those of us who love flyweights and would be a great send off for Seery if he can pull this off.

#MMA #UFC #Scotland

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theworstbob · 8 years ago

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every grammy for record of the year settled

another installment of what is slowly becoming a series of me pointing at things i’m mostly okay with and making simple jokes instead of writing actual things. i have six rough drafts of fictional shorts i said i wanted to post by the end of january and now its february 11th and fuck, dude, but this is so much easier!

1959 "Catch a Falling Star," by Perry Como "The Chipmunk Song (Christmas Don't Be Late)," by David Seville "Fever," by Peggy Lee "Witchcraft," by Frank Sinatra WINNER: "Nel Blu Dipinto Di Blu (Volare)," by Domenico Modugno

This field actually sets the tone for all the future Grammy categories to come. There's 2 songs that are really fucking good, there's one person who's here because they have a reputation as a person who is popular, there's some fucking awful bullshit that we're only going to remember in five years because it's, y'know, fucking awful bullshit, and then the winner is some obscure nonsense that sort of renders the whole operation moot, like if in 2007 the Oscar for Best Picture went to Chumscrubber, or if the Falcons won the Super Bowl. Peggy Lee/Frank Sinatra : Beyonce/Rihanna+Drake :: Perry Como : Adele, David Seville : Lukas Graham :: Domenico Modugno : twenty one pilots.

Yeah the winner is "Fever." I'm not looking to re-invent the wheel here, the best song of these five is "Fever," like are you kidding me, "Fever." "Fever," guys. "Catch a Falling Star" is a relic of an era where all we wanted from male pop stars was for them to be a gentle father in a sweater to say he's proud of us, "Witchcraft" goes but its only failure is that it's not "Fever," hahaha they actually thought "The Chipmunk Song" would stand the test of time, and "Nel Blu Dipinto Di Blu (Volare)?" Fuck outta here, "Nel Blu Dipinto Di Blu (Volare)." I have nothing to say to you. What are you? I don't care. You're not "Fever." Also I immediately regret this exercise because now I'm just angry I'm alive in era where songs don't have horn sections. Someone give me a big band cover of "Closer." Yeah I know Postmodern Jukebox did "Closer" BUT THEY DIDN'T DO IT THE WAY I WANTED. DO IT AGAIN.

TRUE ENDING: "Fever"

1960 "A Fool Such as I," by Elvis Presley "High Hopes," by Frank Sinatra "Like Young," by Andre Previn "The Three Bells," by The Browns WINNER: "Mack the Knife," by Bobby Darin

Im going to give Andre Previn a shitton of extra credit here for apparently naming his album Secret Songs for Young Lovers, which is a simply killer album title. Like I think only Mitski's Bury Me at Makeout Creek can stand up to that title. I'm also giving it extra credit for being an instrumental, that's just refreshing. It still only adds up to a strong second, I'm not here to be contrarian (yet), they got it right, but yo, Andre Previn! You seem chill.

TRUE ENDING: "Mack the Knife"

1961 "Are You Lonesome Tonight?" by Elvis Presley "Georgia on My Mind," by Ray Charles "Mack the Knife," by Ella Fitzgerald "Nice 'n Easy," by Frank Sinatra WINNER: "Theme from A Summer Place," by Percy Faith

Hey! Black people! I legitimately was worried we wouldn't see them for another few years, but hey, they got an early invite (relative to American history)! I like that "Mack the Knife" was nominated again. It makes me wish that, last year, both Tay Tay's "Blank Space" and the indie dudebro's "Blank Space" cover had been nominated simultaneously. When you type "Georgia on My Mind" into the YouTube search bar, suggested searches include "Ludacris," "Willie Nelson," and "Michael Buble," and that is one person away from being a party I'd like to attend. I really want to give this to "Mack the Knife" again because I think that'd be funny, and I, an ignoramus, shouted "YO THIS IS THAT SONG?" the second I heard "Theme from A Summer Place," I've heard that used as a music cue in a billion comedies, that song is iconic, but the winner is "Georgia on My Mind." That song won an Oscar for Jamie Foxx.

TRUE ENDING: "Georgia on My Mind"

1962 "Big Bad John," by Jimmy Dean "The Second Time Around," by Frank Sinatra "Take Five," by The Dave Brubeck Quartet "(Up a) Lazy River," by Si Zentner WINNER: "Moon River," by Henry Mancini

"Big Bad John" just makes me angry that country music used to feel legit and dangerous, and nowadays Brantley Gilbert thinks he's an outlaw because he has a tattoo honoring the 2nd Amendment (a law). I promised myself I wouldn't turn any one part of this into an extended treatise on bro country, but it's not extended if I keep it to two sentences, however compounded they may be! Anyhoo. These are five decidedly not-unpleasant songs by five white dudes. I understand I'm making an assumption about Si Zentner here, but it's 1962. People were still wearing hats in this season of Mad Men, I think it's a safe assumption. I think. I dunno. I think? Yeah, fuck it, "Take Five," that had a pretty boss drum section. Imagine listening to every song made in 1961 and thinking, "Yes. These. I love these five songs." "Stand By Me" was the biggest hit of the year. "Runaway" was number two, I'm pretty sure that was a banger, and if not at least it couldn't be worse than these five. "Hit the Road Jack." "Crying." "Shop Around." "Crazy." Hey guys I just made a hot discovery, I think solely using the Grammy nominees for Record of the Year does not an accurate snapshot of music history provide.

TRUE ENDING: It doesn't matter because it can't be "Stand By Me," but "Take Five" I guess

1963 "Desafinado," by Stan Getz & Charlie Byrd "Fly Me to the Moon Bossa Nova," by Joe Harnell and His Orchestra "I Can't Stop Loving You," by Ray Charles "What Kind of Fool Am I?" by Sammy Davis Jr. WINNER: "I Left My Heart in San Francisco," by Tony Bennett

You can pick up some interesting tidbits from music history, though, such as the fact conductors would have "and their orchestra" in their name. I'd be so much more okay with the state of things, as they are, if The Chainsmokers would start going by The Chainsmokers and Their Soundboard. I don't mean to impugn The Chainsmokers' ability as songwriters, I'd listen to "Closer" a million times before I gave any of these songs another spin, I would just prefer more accuracy in my song attribution. Also the extra credit "Like Young" got for being an instrumental is waning. I could have listened to "Run Up" five times. That's what I could have done with these twenty minutes. ...At least they didn't nominate "The Monster Mash." It wouldn't have been without precedent! They could have nominated "The Monster Mash." No matter how bad it is, it can always get worse.

TRUE ENDING: "I Can't Stop Loving You"

1964 "Dominique," by The Singing Nun "Happy Days Are Here Again," by Barbra Streisand "I Wanna Be Around," by Tony Bennett "Wives and Lovers," by Jack Jones WINNER: "Days of Wine and Roses," by Henry Mancini

when do the 1960s get to the seasons of mad men with stan in them. oh okay hi there "wives and lovers" aren't you horrible. what a blast from the past you are. why am i doing this. fuck it.

TRUE ENDING: "Dominique"

1965 "Downtown," by Petula Clark "Hello, Dolly!" by Louis Armstrong "I Want to Hold Your Hand," by The Beatles "People," by Barbra Streisand WINNER: "The Girl from Ipanema," by Astrud Gilberto & Stan Getz

HERE. WE. FUCKING. GO. Holy shit. Up-tempo music! Songs I wouldn't only ever listen to in hotel lobbies, that aren't all the exact same ballad! What good fortune! We can actually have a fun debate over which of these songs was actually the best! Sort of. I mean. Just in terms of cultural impact, it's "I Want to Hold Your Hand." I wouldn't dare argue that "I Want to Hold Your Hand" isn't a historically significant song. But "Downtown" is just a nice song about going to the city and seeing a moviefilm, "Hello, Dolly!" is just a wonderful little ditty which brings to mind Freakazoid, "People," erm, and "The Girl from Ipanema" is about as surreal as it gets when you're talking about Record of the Year nominees. And we're not talking about cultural impact, y'know? (At least for now, this is gonna go all over the place.) We're talking about my shitty opinion which, here, overlaps with that of the Grammys in this instance. "The Girl from Ipanema" is dope.

TRUE ENDING: "The Girl from Ipanema"

1966 "Yesterday," by The Beatles "The 'In' Crowd," by The Ramsey Lewis Trio "King of the Road," by Roger Miller "The Shadow of Your Smile," by Tony Bennett WINNER: "A Taste of Honey," by Herb Alpert and the Tijuana Brass

It sounds like taking the easy way out to pick what is widely recognized as the best song ever made by what is widely recognized as the best rock band of all time, but. Um. It's really hard to argue for the other four songs here. You could, in a vacuum, almost make an argument for "The 'In' Crowd?" But I'm at the point in this project where I am completely okay with the idea of never hearing a jazz instrumental ever again. Also I regret being mean to Barbra Streisand the last two years, you're right, those jokes were unair, she's a national treasure and I miss the days when true theatre kids could score Record of the Year noms. The only representation theatre kids get in pop music these days is Tay Tay, and that's disappointing. Anyhoo, yeah, fucking "Yesterday." Whatever.

TRUE ENDING: "Yesterday"

1967 "Almost Persuaded," by David Houston "Monday, Monday," by The Mamas & the Papas "What Now My Love," by Herb Alpert and the Tijuana Brass "Winchester Cathedral," by The New Vaudeville Band WINNER: "Strangers in the Night," by Frank Sinatra

One positive from this experience is that all the Mario Maker videos that YouTube had been recommending to me for months are being replaced with songs from the '60s YouTube thinks I might enjoy. Lemme talk about my YouTube recommendations window for a hot second because it’s gone through some shit to get me to watch Mario Maker content. There was a chain. Like, carlsagan42, I could understand, I'd watched AGDQ VODs that featured him, YouTube knew I liked speedrunning and Let's Plays of Mario Maker, here's this guy. And GrandPooBear, that was fair, he was in AGDQ, he seemed like a chill dude, it made sense I would enjoy him, too. But now it's recommending just random dudes to me. "Here's a white dude with a beard playing carlsagan's troll level!" Alright, I guess I fuck with him, he seems chill. "Hey! We found this white dude with a beard playing that white dude with a beard's troll level!" Wh - okay, this is, why is his display name Japanese, I don't, why are y "Here's a dude who just plays troll levels!" GREAT, WHY. WHY DID HE MAKE A CAREER OF DOING THAT. These songs are uninspiring, is what I'm saying. In 1966, notable releases (according to Wikipedia so who actually knows but I'ma go with it) include "The Sound of Silence," "Uptight (Everything's Alright)," "These Boots Are Made for Walkin'," "When a Man Loves a Woman," "Paint it Black," "You Can't Hurry Love," "It's a Man's Man's Man's World," "I Got You (I Feel Good)," "Good Vibrations," "I'm a Believer," and "You Keep Me Hanging On." "Ain't Too Proud to Beg." "God Only Knows!" I listened to "Winchester Cathedral." None of these songs deserve any recognition.

TRUE ENDING: i mean "Monday, Monday" but legit who could find it in them to care

1968 "By the Time I Get to Phoenix," by Glen Campbell "My Cup Runneth Over," by Ed Ames "Ode to Billie Joe," by Bobbie Gentry "Somethin' Stupid," by Nancy Sinatra & Frank Sinatra WINNER: "Up, Up and Away," by The 5th Dimension

R E S P-E C T No but like legit there was one year where it sounded like the Grammys were finally over the '50s. Ah, but no! No. ...The world had "Ain't No Mountain High Enough" in 1967. Fucking, a version of "Try a Little Tenderness" dropped in 1967. AND THEY HAD "MY CUP RUNNETH OVER." I AM APPALLED. I AM AGHAST. THIS I -- man, fuck this awards show in particular. I'm giving this to "Ode to Billie Joe" because it's the only song of this bunch I feel I'm being unfair to by bringing up better songs. That song holds its own. It's dark, it's grim, it fucks you up in all the right ways. It's the rare song that feels dated because it's so far ahead of its genre's current game. And I guess I'm down with "Up, Up and Away," too, sure, yeah, whatever, I'm down for a nice song about balloon rides. Everything else, tho. Especially "Somethin' Stupid." Wow. That sure is a thing that happened. That sure is a thing multiple people thought was a great idea! My stars.

TRUE ENDING: "Ode to Billie Joe"

1969 "Harper Valley PTA," by Jeannie C. Riley "Hey Jude," by The Beatles "Honey," by Bobby Goldsboro "Wichita Lineman," by Glen Campbell WINNER: "Mrs. Robinson," by Simon & Garfunkel

In back-to-back years, country songs performed by women were nominated for Record of the Year and subsequently adopted into feature-length films. Country music used to own, is the primary takeaway from this exercise so far. Anyhoo. I'm not gonna judge these nominees by what they could have been, because it's not necessarily these songs' fault they're not the songs that actually define this era of American history. They're nice, safe songs, and it's totally understandable why a committee wouldn't disagree with making these the five songs they wanted to present to an increasingly discomfited public for their good-time parade of nice-seeming celebrity. I don't know why I expected an awards show to lead any kind of movement in the late 1960s, it's not their job now and it certainly wasn't then, but I thought I'd at least be getting jams from the past. I got the worst Beatles song and "My Cup Runneth Over."

TRUE ENDING: "Harper Valley PTA"

1970 "A Boy Named Sue," by Johnny Cash "Is That All There Is?" by Peggy Lee "A Time for Us," by Henry Mancini "Spinning Wheel," by Blood, Sweat & Tears WINNER: "Aquarius/Let the Sunshine In," by The 5th Dimension

Well, this is the least disappointing batch of nominees in years! These songs are more than unobjectionable. "A Boy Named Sue" and "Is That All There Is?" and "Aquarius" are all unimpeachable. Picking one of those three is rough, but honestly I'm just stoked to have a hard choice to make. ...I almost want to go with "A Boy Named Sue" just so I don't have to agree with the Grammys after slagging on them so much, but like "Aquarius/Let the Sunshine In." Like, I have a vision of what the 1970s sounded like, and I just typed I had a vision of what something sounded like and I need to like take a walk or drink a water or something. Take a moment, take a breath, come back stronger.

TRUE ENDING: "Aquarius/Let the Sunshine In"

1971

"(They Long to Be) Close to You," by The Carpenters "Everything is Beautiful," by Ray Stevens "Fire and Rain," by James Taylor "Let It Be," by The Beatles WINNER: "Bridge Over Troubled Water," by Simon & Garfunkel

...OK I'm not into any of these so let's just list other notable songs that were likely released in 1970. "ABC." "Big Yellow Taxi." "Black Magic Woman." "Express Yourself." "Get Up (I Feel Like Being a) Sex Machine." "I WANT YOU BACK." They nominated a song which explicitly states that everything is beautiful and ignored the song which provides IRREFUTABLE FUCKING PROOF the world is beautiful. We're not done. "Lola." "The Letter." "Paranoid." "SIGNED, SEALED, DELIVERED I'M YOURS." NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT. ONLY THE GREATEST FUCKING SONG OF ALL TIME. THAT HAS NO PLACE IN THE GRAMMYS! WHY SHOULD IT? THERE'S TOO MANY BALLADS IN THE WORLD FOR US TO PAY "SIGNED, SEALED, DELIVERED I'M YOURS" ANY MIND. Shit. I dunno. How could I possibly know.

TRUE ENDING: "(They Long to Be) Close to You"

1972 "Joy to the World," by Three Dog Night "My Sweet Lord," by George Harrison "Theme from Shaft," by Isaac Hayes "You've Got a Friend," by James Taylor WINNER: "It's Too Late," by Carole King

OH HELL YES. I can get behind this field, which is to say: I am getting behind the theme from Shaft. "Joy to the World" is lovably loony, I'm not about to speak ill of Carole King, "My Sweet Lord" is about as good a song like that as you're ever gonna find, but Shaft. Shaft, y'all.

TRUE ENDING: "Theme from Shaft"

1973 "Alone Again (Naturally)," by Gilbert O'Sullivan "American Pie," by Don McLean "Song Sung Blue," by Neil Diamond "Without You," by Harry Nilsson WINNER: "The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face," by Roberta Flack

"Superstition." I honestly don't get what Kanye hopes to accomplish by boycotting the Grammys when the Grammys couldn't give "Signed, Sealed Delivered I'm Yours" or "Superstition" their due. What even was that Gilbert O'Sullivan nonsense. Criminy. This is, this is just who they are, y'know? Neil Diamond sings the blues. That most iconic blues performer, Neil Diamond. They get no points for giving the trophy to Roberta Flack. Roberta Flack is something we can all agree on, you don't get a PhD in astronomy for pointing at the sun and saying "that's a bright ol' star!" and you don't get credence as a song-recognizing function for recognizing Roberta Flack made a good song.

TRUE ENDING: "The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face"

1974 "Bad, Bad Leroy Brown," by Jim Croce "Behind Closed Doors," by Charlie Rich "You Are the Sunshine of My Life," by Stevie Wonder "You're So Vain," by Carly Simon WINNER: "Killing Me Softly with His Song," by Roberta Flack

I. I don't WANT to agree with this terrible program twice in a row. I'm glad to see Stevie eventually got a make-up nom, but I don't really feel that song too deeply (at least, judged against the rest of his catalogue; this would be the best song Gilbert O'Sullivan ever made by a country-ass mile), and no that doesn't make any sense but I've listened to 16 years' worth of songs the Grammys think are good, I'm not in a good place right now. I could easily say "Bad, Bad Leroy Brown" takes it, it's a great song, it wouldn't be that b -- but "Killing Me Softly with His Song," though! Am I sort of giving it the nod because of The Fugees' version? Yes, but, see, The Fugees' version doesn't get nominated, so.

TRUE ENDING: "Killing Me Softly with His Song"

1975 "Don't Let the Sun Go Down on Me," by Elton John "Feel Like Makin' Love," by Roberta Flack "Help Me," by Joni Mitchell "Midnight at the Oasis," by Maria Muldaur WINNER: "I Honestly Love You," by Olivia Newton-John

...I mean. I sort of decided to make Roberta Flack a hero today after spending a lifetime not thinking of her that often? But I spent the entire 1960s listening to jazz compositions and friendly dads giving me life advice. "Feel Like Makin' Love" is, when considering the scale of this project, like breathing in skunkless country air after a lifetime in the city. Which isn't to say "Don't Let the Sun Go Down on Me" isn't the class of the pop sub-genre Songs Clay Aiken Can Capably Perform, or that "Help Me" isn't a jam. Just, Roberta Flack made three nice songs, and that makes this project worth pursuing somehow, no matter how many times I have to listen to blondes whisper about how much they love someone.

TRUE ENDING: "Feel Like Makin' Love"

1976 "At Seventeen," by Janis Ian "Lyin' Eyes," by Eagles "Mandy," by Barry Manilow "Rhinestone Cowboy," by Glen Campbell WINNER: "Love Will Keep Us Together," by Captain & Tennille

the best song i heard in this batch was the five seconds of rock guitar in the miller lite ad that presaged "rhinestone cowboy." i mean, on its own, "rhinestone cowboy" would have been the true ending, but that five seconds of guitar the youtube advertising algorithm attached to the beginning pushed it over the top.

TRUE ENDING: "Rhinestone Cowboy"

1977 "Afternoon Delight," by Starland Vocal Band "50 Ways to Leave Your Lover," by Paul Simon "I Write the Songs," by Barry Manilow "If You Leave Me Now," by Chicago WINNER: "This Masquerade," by George Benson

...So, it's been a while, right, since we complained that what was presented to us isn't what it could've been? But since a clear novelty song about bangin' when the sun's out was given a nod, let's see what else 1976 had to offer. Hm, well, the two biggest hits of the year were "Dancing Queen" and "Bohemian Rhapsody." Those aren't too egregious, assuming your standard for egregious is "Signed, Sealed Delivered I'm Yours." Which is to say, if you're dead inside, those aren't notable omissions. "Baby, I Love Your Way" is as basic as anything in this field, but I think people remember that as an Actually Good song, so I'ma bring that up. "I Wish!" "The Rubberband Man" is the best song about a fat man playing his body as an instrument you're ever like to hear. "Squeeze Box" was the centerpoint of one of the better Freaks & Geeks scenes. I'm listening to "I Write the Songs." Everyone who thinks the past is better is wrong. "I Write the Songs” is a less self-aware version of "7 Years." "50 Ways to Leave Your Lover" is acceptable, I guess. It was compelling, and it grabbed my attention. I think "This Masquerade" had its moments, but "50 Ways to Leave Your Lover" had me. I dunno. I think it's just bad that I, a music history simpleton, could come up with a viable ROTY field with like half a minute of looking at Wikipedia. Hell, I'm gonna go ahead and be super unfair and judge the Grammys for not seeing into the future and seeing all the dope tweets about "The Boys Are Back in Town."

TRUE ENDING: "50 Ways to Leave Your Lover"

1978 "Blue Bayou," by Linda Rondstadt "Don't It Make My Brown Eyes Blue," by Crystal Gayle "Evergreen (Love Theme from A Star Is Born)," by Barbra Streisand "You Light Up My Life," by Debby Boone WINNER: "Hotel California," by Eagles

I'm going to give this year props for featuring four songs performed by women in the ROTY field. Remember my alt-nominee field from last year? The only women in that field were in ABBA. So at least the Grammys got this right, ignore the racial composition of this field DON'T THINK TOO HARD ABOUT IT, and then it would be until 1999 that the Grammys would have another year with a 4:1 female:male ratio in this category. Anyway, "Blue Bayou." If that surprises you, you haven't been paying attention.

TRUE ENDING: "Blue Bayou"

1979 "Baker Street," by Gerry Rafferty "Feels So Good," by Chuck Mangione "Stayin' Alive," by Bee Gees "You Needed Me," by Anne Murray WINNER: "Just the Way You Are," by Billy Joel

...i thought we were done with jazz instrumentals. another fool am i. Anyway fuck everything in this world that isn't the sax solo in "Baker Street" for not being the sax solo in "Baker Street." See that song is basically a jazz instrumental, but,,, the sax solo in "Baker Street" is maybe the greatest thing that's ever been? Also let's just note how the first disco song nominated for Record of the Year is by three white dudes. Dope. History is cool. But at least we have the sax solo from "Baker Street" to keep us warm.

TRUE ENDING: "Baker Street"

1980 "After the Love Has Gone," by Earth, Wind and Fire "I Will Survive," by Gloria Gaynor "The Gambler," by Kenny Rogers "You Don't Bring Me Flowers," by Barbra Streisand & Neil Diamond WINNER: "What a Fool Believes," by The Doobie Brothers

listen, i took some time off to do other things, and then i woke up at two am this morning and said, "let's continue this fool's errand!" and i made it through a few years and now it's two hours later and i am interesting in selecting the INCREDIBLY OBVIOUS CHOICE and moving on

TRUE ENDING: "I Will Survive"

1981 "The Rose," by Bette Midler "Lady," by Kenny Rogers "Theme from New York, New York," by Frank Sinatra "Woman in Love," by Barbra Streisand WINNER: "Sailing," by Christopher Cross

woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooow. um. i mean, 1980 isn't a particularly inspiring year? but got.DAMN this field is so bad "escape (the pina colada song)" has a viable claim to snub status. how did this awards show survive? how did we never do better than this? are we just committed to not being into the american music awards?

TRUE ENDING: "Woman in Love"

1982 "Arthur's Theme (Best That You Can Do)," by Christopher Cross "(Just Like) Starting Over," by John Lennon "Endless Love," by Diana Ross & Lionel Richie "Just the Two of Us," by Grover Washington, Jr. with Bill Withers "Bette Davis Eyes," by Kim Carnes

I've listened to two Christopher Cross songs and "Endless Love" before having any coffee, which was a mistake. We're at this weird point in history where my unearned nostalgia doesn't exist because I'm pretty sure the '80s were mostly terrible, and the Grammys aren't 1981 bad because I get a chance to shout out Bill Withers (which I'm sure he totally appreciates, this sort of seems like something that wouldn't insult his very being, is some asshat pointing out how great he is in a whole entire piece where nothing of substance is ever said), but they're still really fuckin' bad. Also ignore what I said about the '80s being terrible because fuckin' "9 to 5" was dropped this year, as was "Don't Stop Believin'!" They selected John Lennon's best Queen impression. Dead Kennedys released a song called "Nazi Punks Fuck Off!" in 1981. That classic is, somehow, timeless.

TRUE ENDING: "Just the Two of Us"

1983 "Steppin' Out," by Joe Jackson "Ebony and Ivory," by Paul McCartney & Stevie Wonder "Always on My Mind," by Willie Nelson "Chariots of Fire," by Vangelis WINNER: "Rosanna," by Toto

As alluded to above, I am a card-carrying member of something I guess I have to call Poo Nation. (There is no card, regrettably.) I'd have to check the rules, but I am pretty sure I'm not allowed to besmirch the good name of Toto, even if the song in question is not "Africa." I think "Steppin' Out" might've been a good true ending in an alternate universe, and it's hard to deny "Chariots of Fire" is legendary (if anything has to be the last instrumental I hear while doing this, I'm glad it was that), but I'm not tryna incur anyone's wrath here. Also, hey, here's Stevie Wonder and Willie Nelson, getting makeup nods for lesser tracks. "Ebony and Ivory," that's just a more prestigious version of "Accidental Racist." No one should feel good about that song. But the first six seconds of Rosanna, that's a sort of "pinnacle of human achievement" thing, that's something we should put in a museum.

TRUE ENDING: "Rosanna"

1984 "Flashdance... What a Feeling," by Irene Cara "Every Breath You Take," by The Police "All Night Long (All Night)," by Lionel Richie "Maniac," by Michael Sembello WINNER: "Beat It!" by Michael Jackson

Wh... What is this? What just happened? A whole five songs I've listened to outside the context of this project? Songs which all still endure to this day? A winner that could actually stake a claim as the most iconic song of 1983? The Grammys! It's like you just took off your glasses and did your hair all fancy and showed up to prom, and I'm just like, oh shit, the theatre dork was actually hot all along! Did we find it? Did we find the turning point? Did Flashdance provide the turning point? Is that the movie musical you guys watched and thought, "Oh shit, this music actually kind of goes, I think we oughta get with the times?" /looks at the next year/ IT IS! Bless you, Flashdance. Bless this change you provoked in the Grammys. I'm not about to do something silly like not pick "Beat It!" but I will at least acknowledge that you are phenomenal and were the true spark that ignited the Grammys and also no one involved in your production ever fucked any kids, probably.

TRUE ENDING: "Beat It!"

1985 "Hard Habit to Break," by Chicago "Girls Just Want to Have Fun," by Cyndi Lauper "The Heart of Rock 'n Roll," by Huey Lewis and the News "Dancing in the Dark," by Bruce Springsteen WINNER: "What's Love Got to Do with It," by Tina Turner

hm. it's such a tight field we have here. not a one clear standout in this bunch. i don't know. this is a tough choice. i'm sure glad i wasn't a voting member in 1985. imagine seeing the choice laid before you and slowly having the impossibility of the task ahead dawn on you. what a daunting prospect. (tell ya what tho, "Girls Just Want to Have Fun" is a strong-as-hell second place, and "Dancing in the Dark" is possibly the strongest bronze.)

TRUE ENDING: "What's Love Got to Do with It," by Tina Turner

1986 "Money for Nothing," by Dire Straits "The Boys of Summer," by Don Henley "The Power of Love," by Huey Lewis & the News "Born in the U.S.A.," by Bruce Springsteen WINNER: "We Are the World," by USA for Africa

oh praise ra i actually get to break from the grammys So I think "The Power of Love" is solid, I think it'd be hard to find someone who'd say they have any sort of disagreement with this sound. "Born in the U.S.A." is similarly a classic. I love how The Other Side keeps trying to repurpose it as a rousing anthem for them when it is an absolutely scathing indictment of what has become of the American working class. It's such a self-own, playing this song at Republican conventions, and I love it every time it happens. You think they'd have learned how to process subtlety by now! But: I am not attached to "Born in the U.S.A." too deeply beyond that. As an emokid straight outta the mid-aughts (hey there goes my claim to any valid political opinion! later, bro!), have a special connection to "Boys of Summer," tho. Is Don Henley's version The Ataris' version? No. It is not. But we set the precedent in the Roberta Flack threepeat that, even though this is Record of the Year, we will recognize the power of the composition. We also must acknowledge that "Money for Nothing" is the absolute fucking worst.

TRUE ENDING: "The Boys of Summer"

1987 "Sledgehammer," by Peter Gabriel "Greatest Love of All," by Whitney Houston "Addicted to Love," by Robert Palmer "That's What Friends Are For," by Dionne Warwick & Friends WINNER: "Higher Love," by Steve Winwood

One other notable change, apart from the fact the songs are now actual songs that I can imagine people casually listening to in the era in which they were released: these songs are fucking long. You go back to the first Grammys, I don't think any songs lasted past 3:15, and now we have "Sledgehammer," which lasts five minutes. All the songs from the 1986 field were five minutes long. It sort of feels like we've trimmed the excess in our modern era, because my reaction to all these songs is, "Alright, I'm feeling this one! I am grooving! ...Okay, I've grooved. I've felt it. You can go now. No, you can g -- oh, more? OK, cool, I guess that's cool." Except "Addicted to Love." That's a positively breezy four minutes, and it holds the attention the entire time. It's slightly leery? It's kind of "Blurred Lines"y? But it's not overtly gross that it's unworthy of celebration!

TRUE ENDING: "Addicted to Love"

1988 "La Bamba," by Los Lobos "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For," by U2 "Luka," by Suzanne Vega "Back in the High Life Again," by Steve Winwood WINNER: "Graceland," by Paul Simon

...Yeah, fuck it, "La Bamba," I don't like that the choice I have to make is a cover of a '50s hit, but HASHTAG GRAMMYS, amirite. Time to look at Wikipedia because the Grammys have displeased me! ...OK, so there's "I Wanna Dance with Somebody." "Alone" has been a stable of reality singing competitions for thirty years, now! "Bad" woulda been acceptable. "Don't Dream It's Over" may not be the most notable tune in the world, but unlike eventual champion "La Bamba," it was made in 1987. "UM "FAITH" HOW ABOUT?! "The Final Countdown" is listed as a 1987 single and I get why it wouldn't get ROTY love but I would be remiss not to point out its presence on the list. Who doen't love "(I Just) Died in Your Arms?" LL Cool J coulda gotten some hype, I'm not gonna pretend to be familiar with '80s rap but that's a name I know. "Need You Tonight" got INXS a reality show 20 years later. WHAT THE FUCK YOU COULD'VE EASILY REPLACED "LA BAMBA" WITH "RHYTHM IS GONNA GET YOU." "Welcome to the Jungle" is a metal song, sure, but you're gonna tell me that's less influential than "Graceland?" Also I changed my mind because I forgot how fucking good "Luka" is.

TRUE ENDING: "Luka."

1989 "Giving You the Best That I Got," by Anita Baker "Fast Car," by Tracy Chapman "Man in the Mirror," by Michael Jackson "Roll with It," by Steve Winwood WINNER: "Don't Worry, Be Happy," by Bobby McFerrin

I commend "Don't Worry, By Happy" for laying the foundation for maybe the greatest Key & Peele sketch, and I'm loathe to pick two unrelentingly sad songs about good people in awful situations in a row, but, like, "Fast Car." "Fast Car," y'all.

TRUE ENDING: "Fast Car"

1990 "The End of the Innocence," by Don Henley "She Drives Me Crazy," by Fine Young Cannibals "We Didn't Start the Fire," by Billy Joel "The Living Years," by Mike + the Mechanics WINNER: "Wind Beneath My Wings," by Bette Midler

So apparently the two things I liked about the 1980s are the kitschy one-hit-wonder-y singles that are completely of their times, and the songs about horrifying tragedies. But y'know what at least those were closer to the vision of '80s music I had in my head than the options from the '70s were to ‘70s music. I don't know if that sentence makes sense. I've listened to a lot of bad and/or trashy music. For no reason. When was the last time I asked why I was doing this? I would like to ask that question again: why am I doing this

TRUE ENDING: "She Drives Me Crazy"

1991 "Vision of Love," by Mariah Carey "U Can't Touch This," by MC Hammer "From a Distance," by Bette Midler "Nothing Compares 2 U," by Sinead O'Connor WINNER: "Another Day in Paradise," by Phil Collins

MC Hammer has more ROTY nominations as a performer than Prince. The first rap song ever nominated for ROTY was "U Can't Touch This." MC Hammer was the first rapper to earn a ROTY nomination. ...You're right, this isn't fair, MC Hammer apparently built himself, and the distinction easily could've gone to MC Skat Kat. That's the motto: no matter how bad, it could always be worse. TRUE ENDING: "Vision of Love"

1992 "(Everything I Do) I Do it for You," by Bryan Adams "Baby Baby," by Amy Grant "Something to Talk About," by Bonnie Raitt "Losing My Religion," by R.E.M. WINNER: "Unforgettable," by Natalie Cole w/Nat King Cole

I am 100% convinced "Unforgettable" only won because the Grammys were completely in love with the fact Natalie Cole and Nat King Cole performed together. "Look!" they said, laughing and clapping. "Their names are of similar mouthsound! Delightful!" Anyway, instead of the idiosyncratic rock song, we're going with the country song about doin' it.

TRUE ENDING: "Something to Talk About"

1993 "Achy Breaky Heart," by Billy Ray Cyrus "Beauty & the Beast," by Celine Dion & Peabo Bryson "Constant Craving," by k.d. lang "Save the Best for Last," by Vanessa Williams WINNER: "Tears in Heaven," by Eric Clapton

OH SHIT THE GRAMMYS JUST HIT US WITH THE THROWBACK! Awful novelty single? CHECK. Treacly ballad? CHECK. Ponderous slow song from an influential-but-overlooked performer? I FEEL BAD ABOUT SAYING IT BECAUSE IT'S A SONG ABOUT HIS KID WHO DIED BUT, OKAY, THIS IS WHO I AM, CHECK. And we have A NEW KIND OF BAD this year: THE POP VERSION OF THE SONG FROM THE MOVIE MUSICAL. Angela Lansbury or GTFO. k.d. lang does sort of earn this by default, I'm not gonna lie to you and say I dug the song presented to me, but I absoltuely respect the pioneering work she did in advancing stylization in performers' name. k.d. lang paved the streets on which Panic! At the Disco marches.

TRUE ENDING: "Constant Craving"

1994 "A Whole New World," by Peabo Bryson & Regina Belle "The River of Dreams," by Billy Joel "If I Ever Lose My Faith in You," by Sting "Harvest Moon," by Neil Young WINNER: "I Will Always Love You," by Whitney Houston

The end result is always the same, no matter what, but hoo boy, this sequence is something else. '90s music is generally ugh, but you had "Nuthin' but a 'G' Thang," "Mr. Jones," "No Rain," "Shoop," "What's Up?" But this. Billy Joel. Again. It's only been three times or something but it feels like Billy Joel has been nominated for this award every year.

TRUE ENDING: "I Will Always Love You"

1995 "I'll Make Love to You," by Boyz II Men "He Thinks He'll Keep Her," by Mary Chapin Carpenter "Love Sneakin' up on You," by Bonnie Raitt "Streets of Philadelphia," by Bruce Springsteen WINNER: "All I Wanna Do," by Sheryl Crow

The Grammys have relapsed pretty hard. And because we're in the 1990s, and also I've kind of hit a wall in terms of my enthusiasm for this project, I'm not even listening to these songs, because there's not any lessons to be gleaned here, music was being taken over by grunge and rap and the Grammys didn't know how to react so they literally gave their biggest award to a song which states, "All I wanna do is have some fun." Let's just have some fun, guys! Stop being so sad about everything, let's just, let's play Parcheesi! You used to love Parcheesi! Let's play Parcheesi and just, let's just have some fun! But yeah the Grammys are havin' some issues coming to terms with reality.

TRUE ENDING: "I'll Make Love to You"

1996 "One Sweet Day," by Mariah Carey & Boyz II Men "Gangsta's Paradise," by Coolio "One of Us," by Joan Osborne "Waterfalls," by TLC WINNER: "Kiss from a Rose," by Seal

Now THIS. This, I can extremely fuck with. Nary a quibble I have with the Grammys' assessment of 1995! Do I maybe trade out "One Sweet Day" for "Fantasy?" Of course, I'm not that dead inside. Do I maybe replace "One of Us" with "You Oughta Know?" Eh, I think "One of Us" is more timeless, in that it's about God and not Dave Coulier, but I'd hear the argument. Do I maybe put "Life's a Bitch" in there instead of "Gangsta's Paradise?" Yes, but I completely get why they wouldn't. I think we've found it. I think we've found the most acceptable list! And the winner is almost the acceptable winner! Also, I didn't realize this until I dove into the list of hits from 1995, but apparently Ko[backwards R]n and P.O.D. were active and hitmakers in 1995. I knew it was coming soon? But I didn’t think it started when I was in Kindergarten.

TRUE ENDING: "Gangsta's Paradise"

1997 "Give Me One Reason," by Tracy Chapman "Because You Loved Me," by Celine Dion "Ironic," by Alanis Morissette "1979," by The Smashing Pumpkins WINNER: "Change the World," by Eric Clapton

And we're back. Though, hey, the Grammys are still making incremental progress. There's grunge, earning respectful recognition that it did, indeed, happen, and the Grammys were aware of it but ever distant! Alanis Morissette gets a nod for writing a song about how sometimes bad things happen! And TRACY CHAPMAN JUST ENDS THE FUCKING GAME. Someone once described "Give Me One Reason" as the last true blues hit, and that is such an accurate assessment. Everything about "Give Me One Reason" owns. I am thrilled to have shared some portion of the earth with the two Tracy Chapman songs we have briefly discussed.

TRUE ENDING: "Give Me One Reason"

1998 "Where Have All the Cowboys Gone?" by Paula Cole "Everyday Is a Winding Road," by Sheryl Crow "MMMBop," by Hanson "I Believe I Can Fly," by R. Kelly WINNER: "Sunny Came Home," by Shawn Colvin

I believe it was @fart who tweeted that "Where Have All the Cowboys Gone?" and "The Boys Are Back in Town" share two different perspectives of the same event, and I'm sticking to that here. This right here is sort of the distillation of the '90s, assuming you're ignoring, y'know, rap: while you can't deny that this was probably what everyone in the '90s was listening to, you can absolutely fault everyone in the '90s for listening to this, because this is bad. But this is what was popular! "MMMBop," a song about grappling with your own mortality while making mouthsounds, was the biggest fucking song! You couldn't escape it! "It" referring to "MMMBop!" Like, the 1981 field was bad? But it was bad because it was bland, and it was regressive, and it wasn't of the time. This is bad because the songs are bad. They're all dated, they have no appeal beyond kitschiness, they're just, ugh. For once, it's not the Grammys' fault. ...Not entirely. Again: rap. We had that. We didn't have do the Sheryl Crow thing again.

TRUE ENDING: "Where Have All the Cowboys Gone?"

1999 "The Boy Is Mine," by Brandy & Monica "Iris," by Goo Goo Dolls "Ray of Light," by Madonna "You're Still the One," by Shania Twain WINNER: "My Heart Will Go On," by Celine Dion

The '90s weren't without their saving graces, of course. Golly. Imagine being presented with this field and voting for something that wasn't "The Boy Is Mine." So many people did! I'm not gonna sit here and say that "My Heart Will Go On" wasn't the biggest musical craze of 1998, I lived through that shit, I endured that shit, believe you me, from a historical standpoint, it deserves this award. It's not history's fault, though, that so many more people listened to "My Heart Will Go On" than "The Boy Is Mine." It's those people's fault. WHAT THE HELL, PEOPLE. What was wrong with you. ...At least you're still 15 or so years from your choice being Macklemore. It's hard to tell which is worse, but at least there's a good chunk of time between your failings.

TRUE ENDING: "The Boy Is Mine"

2000 "I Want It That Way," by Backstreet Boys "Believe," by Cher "Livin' La Vida Loca," by Ricky Martin "No Scrubs," by TLC WINNER: "Smooth," by Santana ft./Rob Thomas

...I don't like what I'm about to do. You know I think "Smooth" is a hot one. You know how I feel about guys in the passenger side of their best friend's ride, tryna holla at me. You know what I believe with regards to an existence of a life after love. You know I live that crazy life. ...If I'm doing karaoke, though. If I'm doing karaoke, and I need one song to fire every fucker in this dingy bar the fuck up, I need an all-time classic song that everyone loves and everyone knows, IF I AM SELECTING ONE JAM TO TAKE THIS PEANUT BUTTER SANDWICH CALLED LIFE TO FLAVOR TOWN. ...It's gonna be "I Want It That Way." It's a perfect song. It is expertly crafted, the epitome of Swedish song design. It's this massive engine driving this amazing being into existence. I don't like that it is perfect. You may not like that it is perfect. But it is perfect and we love it. There are truths in life which are undeniable. "I Want It That Way" is one such truth.

TRUE ENDING: "I Want It That Way"

2001 "Say My Name," by Destinys Child "I Try," by Macy Gray "Music," by Madonna "Bye Bye Bye," by *NSYNC WINNER: "Beautiful Day," by U2

ugh what is with the u2 thing Anyway, this would ideally be where we start recognizing the things Beyonce has done for the world and all who live in it, except "I Try" is amazing. Also we're in the aughts and everyone knows and loves the aughts and no one has anything bad to say about the aughts so I'm not even gonna try to stretch for profundity it's lightning round time.

TRUE ENDING: "I Try"

2002 "Video," by india.arie "Fallin'," by Alicia Keys "Ms. Jackson," by OutKast "Drops of Jupiter (Tell Me)," by Train WINNER: "Walk On," by U2

SERIOUSLY THIS U2 THING. WHAT ARE THEY SEEING THAT I'M NOT. WHAT COULD THERE POSSIBLY BE IN THERE. Anyway, hello. Rap has been around for two and a half decades and three rap songs have been nominated for Record of the Year in this space. That is as many rap songs as U2 songs in the same span of time. And lemme just skip ahead real quick here, and... Yep, yep, of course, the entire genre of rap and U2 are still tied in the official Record of the Year Grammy count! That's incredibly acceptable and great.

TRUE ENDING: "Ms. Jackson"

2003 "A Thousand Miles," by Vanessa Carlton "Without Me," by Eminem "Dilemma," by Nelly & Kelly Rowland "How You Remind Me," by Nickelback WINNER: "Don't Know Why," by Norah Jones

Legit question: is "Dilemma" the last great duet? I know Drake and Rihanna have put in work trying to find a great duet, I know Usher and Alicia Keys dropped "My Boo," I'm going to point out New Found Glory and Hayley Williams collaborated on "Vicious Love" and wait until this point is completely ignored before I move on, there we go, I think this might be the last great pop duet! I think the last great pop duet features the iconic screencap of Microsoft Excel Messenger!

TRUE ENDING: "Dilemma"

2004 "Crazy in Love," by Beyonce ft./Jay-Z "Where Is the Love?" by The Black Eyed Peas "Lose Yourself," by Eminem "Hey Ya!" by OutKast WINNER: "Clocks," by Coldplay

See, I'm disqualifying "Crazy in Love" from consideration from the "great duets" debate because it's not a duet. Jay-Z has a feature verse. Anyway: FUCK THIS. "Crazy in Love" vs. "Hey Ya!" absolutely 100% fuck this. Like that's a goddamn debate right there. There could be an entire 1000-episode podcast debating who should have won this category, "Crazy in Love" or "Hey Ya!" And it's not like the other three are slouches. "Lose Yourself" is disappointingly but definitely more popular than either track, "Where Is the Love?" is the kinda-awesome midpoint between Woke BEP and Party BEP, and I'd bop "Clocks" from the party but I'd let it hang for a few minutes, get a glimpse of a world other than its own before throwing it out on its ass. But "Crazy in Love" vs. "Hey Ya!" Fuck, dude. ...Grammys can tie, right? Yeah, there's ties in the Grammys. Fuck it, even if there's not ties in the Grammys, there's ties in this weird alternate reality Grammys because legitimately how the fuck do you choose.

TRUE ENDING: "Hey Ya!" & "Crazy in Love"

2005 "Let's Get it Started," by The Black Eyed Peas "American Idiot," by Green Day "Heaven," by Los Lonely Boys "Yeah!" by Usher ft./Lil' Jon & Ludacris WINNER: "Here We Go Again," by Ray Charles & Norah Jones

...Like?

TRUE ENDING: "Yeah!"

2006 "We Belong Together," by Mariah Carey "Feel Good Inc.," by Gorillaz ft./De La Soul "Hollaback Girl," by Gwen Stefani "Gold Digger," by Kanye West ft./Jamie Foxx WINNER: "Boulevard of Broken Dreams," by Green Day

...OK, shit. Um. "We Belong Together" set the Mariah comeback in stone and history has a place for it, but I don't have a trophy for it. It's "Gold Digger" vs. "Boulevard" for me, and... And I think I gotta give it to. "Boulevard?" See, here's the thing, though, if "Stronger" were nominated a few years down the line, or "Love Lockdown," or "Niggas in Paris," yes! Absolutely, there'd be an argument! But "Gold Digger" is... Not his finest song? It's a funny-ish song about a stereotype. It has charm, it has that Ray Charles sample, but it's sort of, what's the phrase I'm looking for? Chop up the soul Kanye? It's that. It's good not great. "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" is a song that captured the hopelessness and futility of life as a lower-class individual in the Bush era and is presently capturing the hopelessness and futility of life as anyone in the Trump era. The world needed and continues to need songs like that.

TRUE ENDING: "Boulevard of Broken Dreams"

2007 "Be Without You," by Mary J. Blige "You're Beautiful," by James Blunt "Crazy," by Gnarls Barkley "Put Your Records On," by Corinne Bailey Rae WINNER: "Not Ready to Make Nice," by Dixie Chicks

"Not Ready to Make Nice" is the shit. I wanted Mary J. Blige or Gnarls Barkley to win, I could almost write that argument, but I just, "Not Ready to Make Nice" is the angriest song ever written. It is the apotheosis of the "message to the haters" song; it walks the same thematic ground as Tay Tay's "Shake It Off," but thunder emanates from its every step. And it's angry in that plain-spoken metaphorless way only country music can pull off. She does not obscure what has her fucked up: the letter stated, "shut up and sing or your life will be over." She is not going to forget. It's so powerful. Does it define 2006 in music? No, let's not be silly, "SexyBack" owned the year, Timbaland had more than a few songs hit #1, this song didn't have reach or impacy beyond the Grammy, but this song. This fucking song, man.

TRUE ENDING: "Not Ready to Make Nice"

2008 "Irreplaceable," by Beyonce "The Pretender," by Foo Fighters "Umbrella," by Rihanna ft./Jay-Z "What Goes Around.../...Comes Around," by Justin Timberlake WINNER: "Rehab," by Amy Winehouse

okay no need to write an extended defense of this one, we know what's up

TRUE ENDING: "Irreplaceable"

2009 "Chasing Pavements," by Adele "Viva la Vida," by Coldplay "Bleeding Love," by Leona Lewis "Paper Planes," by M.I.A. WINNER: "Please Read the Letter," by Robert Plant & Alison Krauss

i'm not really feelin' any of these songs, but WE'RE SO CLOSE TO THE END so fuck it here's the song i come closest to feeling

TRUE ENDING: "Paper Planes"

2010 "Halo," by Beyonce "I Gotta Feeling," by The Black Eyed Peas "Poker Face," by Lady Gaga "You Belong with Me," by Tay Tay WINNER: "Use Somebody," by Kings of Leon

oh wow, so, y'know, okay, how? how do we still have years like this? i know dope tunes were released in 2009 because i lived it, how do so many people get together and think, "yes! these!" this field is so bad, if you dropped drake's "best i ever had" into it, it would have a legit claim to the title. this is unconscionable! i hate this! why did i do this?

TRUE ENDING: "Poker Face"

2011 "Nothin' on You," by B.O.B. ft./Bruno Mars "Love the Way You Lie," by Eminem & Rihanna "Fuck You," by Cee Lo Green "Empire State of Mind," by Jay-Z ft./Alicia Keys WINNER: "Need You Now," by Lady Antebellum

Ah, the poetry of a group with the word Antebellum in their name emerging from a pack of black artists to claim a trophy they didn't deserve. Memories! What lovely recent history! Anyhoo, as sure as the earth is round, "Fuck You" is the best pop song of the decade so far. I'll fight you. Dungeon fam, I just gave you two Grammys for the mantle.

TRUE ENDING: "Fuck You"

2012 "Holocene," by Bon Iver "Grenade," by Bruno Mars "The Cave," by Mumford & Sons "Firework," by Katy Perry TRUE ENDING: "Rolling in the Deep," by Adele

"love on top," "party rock anthem," "niggas in paris," "the motto," "the edge of glory." what the fuck, you guys. picking songs that are good isn't hard but you fucked it up five times in a row somehow.

TRUE ENDING: i mean "Rolling in the Deep" i guess? ye gods this is dire

2013 "Lonely Boy," by The Black Keys "Stronger (What Doesn't Kill You)," by Kelly Clarkson "We Are Young," by Fun. ft./Janelle Monae "Thinkin Bout You," by Frank Ocean "We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together," by Tay Tay WINNER: "Somebody That I Used to Know," by Gotye ft./Kimbra

So now that we have years and years of historical context for the Grammys, let's take a minute to discuss what a miracle it was that Frank Ocean was ever nominated. The Grammys spent years ignoring anything resembling a subculture. As the 1960s grew increasingly psychedelic, the Grammys kept handing out nominations to Frank Sinatra and jazz instrumentals and gentle sweater dads. They dipped their toes into funkier things in the '70s, but they stayed the hell away from actual funk, from rock, from anything that looked like it might have been near cocaine at any point in their life. They gave Frank Sinatra a ROTY nomination in 1980. 1980! The Grammys had shown zero sign that they were even close to acknowledging a black man with ambiguous sexuality singing songs just on the edge of the mainstream existed. "Thinkin Bout You" peaked at 32 Stateside. There would have been zero outcry outside of The Internet if his song weren't nominated. And yet! They did! I don't get how, but I dig it! Anyway the best song of these six is "We Are Young" and how. How is "Call Me Maybe." ...A thousand steps forward, one step back, I guess.

TRUE ENDING: "We Are Young"

2014 "Radioactive," by Imagine Dragons "Royals," by Lorde "Locked Out of Heaven," by Bruno Mars "Blurred Lines," by Robin Thicke ft./Pharrell Williams & T.I. WINNER: "Get Lucky," by Daft Punk ft./Pharrell Williams

yeah they got it right, i don't care

TRUE ENDING: "Get Lucky"

2015 "Fancy," by Iggy Azalea ft./Charli XCX "Chandelier," by Sia "Shake It Off," by Tay Tay "All About that Bass," by Meghan Trainor WINNER: "Stay with Me," by Sam Smith

wooooooooooooooooooooooooow you really dont have to go back that far to find one of the all-time worst fields. i don't know if we've dropped any song off the face of the earth faster than "fancy," i barely even remembered it existed. "all about that bass" gets more embarrassing with each passing day. "stay with me" is mor pap. "shake it off" is horrifyingly immature and features tay tay rapping, which is, it's just a gross thing to have experienced. "chandelier." "chandelier" almost single-handedly redeems this field. i know i've used this blog to discuss what a miracle it is that sia exists as she does in the music landscape today, but legitimately, what the fuck. how? i don't mind! but how? but no for real "Chandelier," "Happy," "Problem," "Drunk in Love..." hoo boy 2014 was dire, uh, "Timber." shit, dude, yeah, "Timber." ok. ok yeah i guess it's ok as long as "Rude!" didn't make the cut.

TRUE ENDING: "Chandelier"

2016 "Really Love," by D'Angelo & the Vanguard "Thinking Out Loud," by Ed Sheeran "Blank Space," by Tay Tay "Can't Feel My Face," by The Weeknd WINNER: "Uptown Funk," by Mark Ronson ft./Bruno Mars

"Uptown Funk"/"Can't Feel My Face" is the toughest choice since "Hey Ya!"/"Crazy in Love." I think I give it to "Uptown Funk," simply because it doesn't feel like "Can't Feel My Face" exists without it, but man, "Can't Feel My Face" is such a solid track.

TRUE ENDING: "Uptown Funk"

2017 "Hello," by Adele "Formation," by Beyonce "7 Years," by Lukas Graham "Work," by Rihanna ft./Drake "Stressed Out," by twenty one pilots

listen, if i had to pick the field, it's "formation," "stresed out," "love yourself," "closer," and "black beatles." maybe throw "panda" in there over "stressed out," more people seemed to be into that than "stressed out," who cares, 2016 just wasn't great for anything on earth which exists, but hey! at least this field is more or less accurate! i don't know what "7 years" is doing here, and neither do you, but i know we're both hoping it wins so we can watch the first fires of the revolution.

TRUE ENDING: "Formation"

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