#jack is fun he's one of the best villains in gaming but look at a different character pls. pls

[girlwiththegreenhat]

going into the borderIands tag and wondering if i clicked a handsome jack tag by mistake somehow

but no. no i didn't

[imperatorrrrr]

Good morning. Let's make it a fun and engaging activity. I think you'll find it entertaining and rewarding

"Who do you think is the movie or film character that best mirrors Nico's personality, and why?"

Good Evening Anon, thank you for this lovely question.

Unfortunately, you have stumped me. I have been thinking for days about this and essentially my brain has gone empty and I'm not able to think of any movie or television character at all.

But.

I will use your ask, and apologies for co-opting your ask, to finally do my SteveBucky // JackNico are Parallels of Each Other Tangent aka the SteveBucky to JackNico Pipeline

...am I saying Nico is Bucky Barnes? No. Am I saying that Jack and Nico together are very Stucky coded? Yup.

Some things off the bat...Nico has clearly never been brainwashed (the concussions don't count), nor does he have a metal arm, nor has he ever been incorrectly labeled a villain (the Florida Panthers doing this also doesn't count), so like lets just put all of that aside okay and focus on the characters at their core.

1 - Jack Hughes is the undisputed star of the New Jersey Devils. He is a superstar. He is the main focus of media. He will always be the big draw. He has, what is it, the second highest selling jersey throughout the league.

Whomst else is the main focus, the star, the dude who is put in front of the cameras? Steve Rogers.

2 - Bucky Barnes and Steve Rogers are typically seen as being evenly matched in the powers department. Yes, Bucky got the bastardized version of the serum whereas Steve's was pure, but they're pretty much even in terms of the powers they have.

Nico Hischier is also a first overall draft pick just like Jack Hughes.

3 - Bucky Barnes is known to do the spycraft, the jobs that Steve as Captain America can't do or can't be seen to do. He does the dirty work, the behind the scenes stuff. Steve is leading out front with the shiny shield, but Bucky is in the background being stealth getting the job done without anyone noticing.

Nico Hischier is known to do the "dirty work" in hockey games. He goes to the corners to win puck battles, he's net front grappling against opposing players. He's known to be a defensive forward and one of the best in the league (you'll get that Selke win soon!) and he does all this stuff throughout the game that no one is privy to. Most importantly, Nico is matched up against opposing team's lines in such a way as to give Jack Hughes the room to do his Jack magic and give us that flashy highlight reel offense whether it be a silky pass or an unbelievable goal.

Nico in the background. Bucky in the background. Jack in the foreground. Steve in the foreground.

4 - Steve Rogers is known to be an absolute bitch, a mastermind strategist.

Jack Hughes is known for his pithy and generally cunty responses to the media and also having an insane amount of hockey knowledge and being able to see plays and see the ice like no one else.

5 - Bucky Barnes is a caretaker. He looked after Steve when Steve was poorly and sickly when he was younger and in the comics he kind of collects these kids/orphans that he takes under his wing. He also was the dude in charge (under Steve) as Sarge during WWII. He herded Steve and the Howling Commandos and kept them alive.

Now think about Nico Hischier as a Captain. Every quote about his captaincy talks about how he's a better person than he is a player and he's a remarkable player so he must be a fairly amazing person. He cares about making sure his guys are okay and that his guys can come and talk to him about anything not just hockey. He wants to push people to be their best. Coaches, throughout Nico's career, have placed the worst/worse players with Nico because Nico makes them better and takes responsibility for them.

6 - Bucky Barnes' thighs. Nico Hischier's thighs. Do I have to say more?

7 - Steve Rogers, all American, blue eyes, blonde hair. Bucky Barnes, brunette who holds such sadness in his eyes and is incredibly expressive with his face.

Jack Hughes, all American, blue eyes. Nico Hischier, Swiss brunette, who has a face made for tragedy.

8 - Steve Rogers gets into fights. Bucky Barnes pulls him out of them or finishes them for him.

Jack Hughes will find himself the target of an opponent trying to get in a hit and Nico Hischier comes flying in to defend his honor (see: the Nico coming after TK when TK tried to go after Jack incident).

9 - Bucky Barnes was known to be a charming ass mother fucker back in the day. From the comics especially.

Whomst is a charm offensive on the ice and off the ice? Ah, yes, Nico Hischier.

10 - A lot of teammates, when talking about Jack Hughes, say that how he plays and how good he is inspires them to go out there and give it their all. He leads with how good he is on the ice and his hockey skill. He motivates through his sheer skill level. He scores a goal and it turns the entire game around.

Steve Rogers is also known to be quite inspiring as Captain America with his rousing speeches.

11 - Picture it with me now, folks. Pre-Serum!Steve + Pre-War!Bucky Barnes and Jack Hughes + Nico Hischier.

12 - Steve Rogers is the sun and Bucky Barnes is the moon. Jack Hughes is the sun and Nico Hischier is the moon.

I think twelve is a good place to stop right?

It really is no wonder that I so seamlessly transitioned from SteveBucky to JackNico.

[starleska]

welcome to...starleska's f/o round-up 2023! 🥳🥳🥳

below the cut is every single character i've had a crush on in 2023...and there are 30 in total!! 🙈💖 these are given in chronological order of fixation, and they are all new crushes (so re-entering a fixation for a character i've simped for previously doesn't count 😂) now be warned, this is a genuinely unhinged list. they are largely villains. one is a mushroom. one is a vehicle. one is a casino-themed duck-shaped robot. my autism is indiscriminate in the characters it fixates on, and they are all suitably embarrassing 😭💖 without further ado, here we go...

1. James the Red Engine | Thomas the Tank Engine

...shut up 😂💖 at the start of this year i truly lost my mind and fell headfirst into the Thomas the Tank Engine fandom (everyone there is so lovely and creative!!)...and of course, the vain train is my favourite 🙈💖 James is cute okay!! i don't need to justify myself!!! 2. 'Big' Jack Horner | Puss in Boots: The Last Wish

there's no way anyone missed this one - we are quite the tight-knit and dedicated group in the 'Big' Jack Horner fandom 😳💖 come on, look at him...a huge, powerful, obsessive, fancy-bastard collector with an affinity for magic??? he's stunning 🥴💖 i made so many lovely friends through gushing about this horrible man!!! we had so much fun making OCs to ship with him 🙈 one of the most intense fixations i've had all year, and one of the best villains we've seen in years...he is fantastic 🥰 3. Pizzahead | Pizza Tower

i don't know what's in the water of Pizza Tower but it's impossible to be normal about any character you like from that game 🙈💖 of course the evil sentient pizza slice took the top spot, he's so cartoony and ridiculous!!! the amount of power he exerts is also quite the draw 🤭💖 i'm not gonna lie there's a couple other characters from this game i may get into later...we'll see 😉 4. Fingers | Dead End: Paranormal Park

have you heard this guy's voice. can you blame me. deliciously evil fruity monstrosity with supernatural powers? sign me up to whatever sinister scheme Fingers has going on now or in the future 👉👈 he hits a lot of boxes...between the cabaret-style makeup, the posh, dismissive and manipulative personality and the inexplicable Eldritch body, he was always gonna be a crush 🤭 5. M.O.D.O.K. | Marvel

wheeze okay, this was originally a JOKE!!! @thelighttasteslikelasagna sent in this message joking that i look like i'd find M.O.D.O.K. hot, and i was really angry about it for five minutes...and then i discovered the stop-motion cartoon where he's exactly the kind of cringefail malewife villain i enjoy (in the Augustus St. Cloud vein), and the rest is history 🙈💖 definitely one of the silliest crushes i had this year, but he holds a special place in my heart :3c 6. Gargamel | The Smurfs

nah man i was on some serious mental illness at the start of this year 💀 i just can't help it when bad guys are like this, alright!!! Hank Azaria's performance as Gargamel is sooo silly and over-the-top, i couldn't help but love every second he was on screen 🙈💖 Gargamel's just a whole lot of fun!!! who doesn't love a magic-wielding freak hellbent on the destruction of a group of little creatures?? (i cannot and will not be taking any questions at this time 😶) 7. Wally Darling | Welcome Home

my God, the Wally Darling fixation hit the entire Internet like a train 🤭💖 soft-voiced, ambiguously-moraled rizz puppet that he is, how could we not all fall head-over-heels? i have to thank this guy for throwing me headfirst back into fanfic writing, as the whole Welcome Home story really inspired me...not to mention all the lovely folks who wanted to imagine different ways of getting to hold Wally's hand 🥰 hooray for our pretty puppet boy!! 8. Killa Harkan | John Wick: Chapter 4

...yes, i know, it's funny that Killa's the first of two cartoonishly evil German-accented bad guys with sleight of hand tricks and gold teeth on the list this year 😂💖 sitting in the cinema, the second he opened his mouth my partner just turned and stared at me, because they knew. i refuse to apologise for appreciating a really awful bastard - especially one who dresses so sharply 😉 9. Ian Hawke | Alvin and the Chipmunks

yet another member of the 'it started off as a joke...' club 🤭💖 listen, Ian serves!!! we can't resist a smarmy music producer/manage type, can we? Ian's in the same camp as Gargamel for being a deeply evil man whose capacity for doing harm is directed at little creatures. all i'm saying is, he can sign me up for a dodgy deal any day 🥴 10. Myc Cellium | Inside Job

i can't tell if it's my monsterfucker tendencies or my consummate attraction to Brett Gelman but the crass sentient mushroom got me down bad 😭💖 he's just such a menace!! he's got that intoxicating combo of being horribly socially inappropriate and an actual outcast...fellas, Myc was fixation bait for me 😭 11. Klaus Kickenklober | Sing 2

i don't care if you think you're not a furry, someone can and will get you from the Sing franchise, and that is a threat 🙈💖 yesss laugh it up, Star's got another stern and vaguely European cartoon villain added to the list 😂 i just find Klaus so impossibly delightful!!! he'd be a terrible teacher to have in real life, but in fiction, i think i could fix him :3c 12. The Spot | Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse

ohoho, i know you guys were living for The Spot fixation because i remember your reaction to the x Readers 😉 look at him and his incredible design!!! the transformation of The Spot from weak laughable villain to reality-bending monstrosity had me by the throat...and i can't wait to see more of him when the next Spider-Verse drops 👀 13. Mad Mod | Teen Titans

MAD. BLOODY. MOD!!!!! i think our favourite British bastard has to take the crown (literally and figuratively) as my strongest fixation out of the whole of 2023, i lost my mind over this guy. he just consumed my every waking thought!!! 🙈 the style, the voice, the unbelievable engineering skill...Mad Mod is one of those once-in-a-lifetime f/os that you know you'll be obsessed with for a very long time 😳💖 i look back so fondly on those wonderful few months of Mad Mod fandom resurgence, and how that still continues today...here's hoping even more people find out about him and develop their own crushes 😉 shout-out to the lovely @iriso-page who suggested him and Music Meister to me 🙈💖

14. Control Freak | Teen Titans

sdfgdf okay back on form with the fat dweebs, i know, i know!!!! my ravenous Mad Mod fixation wasn't enough to ignore Control Freak, one of the most delightfully stupid villains in Teen Titans...!!! he hits all my buttons (ha!) and i genuinely think his design and powers are kind of epic. would love to see him utilised in the future 😉 (i am never beating the Discord kitten allegations...) 15. Ken | Barbie

well, this particular blond himbo was quite the surprise!! 🤭💖 i'm not usually the one to go for such a stereotypical hottie, but Ryan Gosling plays Ken as so unhinged and...off for the whole movie, he activated the same neurons which come with the weirdest of my crushes 🙈💖 Ken's a misguided sweetheart and i'd love to help him feel a little bit wanted;;; 16. Buck Ruffler the Duck Shuffler | Toontown: Corporate Clash

fell into the wonderful world of Toontown: Corporate Clash and imprinted on this fucker like...well, like a baby duck 😂💖 is this not the most spectacular design for an original Cog you've ever seen?! i love that Buck is an absolutely scrambled robot with a gambling addiction, and i think he'd be lovely (and hilarious) company 🥰

17. Barnaby | Billie Bust Up

ohhhh yesssss Billie Bust Up caught my attention with this sinister goofball!!!! fancy, flamboyant and very into murder...Barnaby has all the traits for any Tumblr Sexyman, and i cannot wait for the full game to drop so we can see even more of him 👀

18. The Mad Hatter/Jervis Tetch | Batman

Jervis Tetch my beloved!! this has been the year of fancy blonds in top-hats, as well as deeply silly hypnotists, and Jervis kicked off this trend with a bang 🙈💖 i'm a Mad Hatter fan generally but B:TAS Jervis is a special kind of pretty stalker, and that voice is delicious 🥴 thanks to him for kicking off an Alice in Wonderland fixation and for finally getting me into drinking tea...the things we do for our crushes, eh? 🥰 19. Music Meister/Darius Chapel | Batman

and here is the first character played by Neil Patrick Harris who made it onto this year's list!!! 🙈💖 another camp, theatrical Batman villain to add to my collection...gorgeous voice, such an immense sense of style, and wonderfully good fun!! i think more people should get a little obsessed with the Music Meister 😉 20. Buggy the Clown | One Piece

none of you can judge me for this one - i remember all the TikTok edits!!! 😂💖 Buggy is pathetic and so much fun - i wasn't expecting to enjoy him as much as i did!! although my fixation for him may have been short-lived, my love for him certainly isn't 🥰 21. Pat Butcher | BBC Ghosts

ohhhh, every now and again a little sweetheart will get me right in the feelings, and Pat Butcher is added proudly to my f/o collection as the second Yorkshireman (next to Salad Fingers 😭). i just love what an upbeat, lovely man he is!! he's so soft and warm to everyone he meets and tries his best to do everything right by his friends...i'd love to cuddle with him 🥺 22. Josh Levy | The Eltingville Club

a classic return to form with Josh Levy, à la Comic Book Guy and Control Freak...really telling on myself by collecting these horrible greasy nerds who would 100% call me something derogatory if i tried to talk to them 💀 i appreciate every last one of The Eltingville Club but Josh, as a failed writer who remains just as toxic as he was when he was a teen, is my undisputed favourite 🙈💖 23. Swan | Phantom of the Paradise

oh God, reawakening my crush on Paul Williams by discovering Swan damn near killed me!!!! 😭💖 i was so obsessed with this man as a kid and the moment i saw him as Swan in POTP i felt intense attraction and gender envy in equal parts;;;; Swan's whole aesthetic and demeaning, inhuman approach to people is impossibly sensual, and i can't overstate enough how little evil dudes in tinted shades will always get me down bad 🙈💖 24. Kinger | The Amazing Digital Circus

my love for Kinger was such a pleasant surprise!! 🤭💖 sweet, anxious fella that he is, all i want to do is get him out of that digital hellscape and ensure he can wrap up in as many blankets as he likes!!! i love his always-on-the-edge-of-a-breakdown portrayal and am so eager to learn more about him and his backstory 👀 25. Peter Gregory | Silicon Valley

ahhh, kicking it the old-fashioned way by getting extremely invested in the most autistic character on the show (and that's saying something, given the high neurodivergent coding of everyone in Silicon Valley 🙈💖). Peter's style and methods of communication are traits i simply find attractive in real life, and although he sadly wasn't with us long, he absolutely stole the show ✨ 26. 'Action' Jack Barker | Silicon Valley

given my love of nerds it's no shocker that Silicon Valley hit me with two f/os, and 'Action' Jack Barker - the tech-field Colin Robinson - was a surefire entry 😳💖 what is it about these milquetoast men who are so whitebread yet are capable of such terrible things which gets me every time?! Jack is such a fun character and i'm glad we got as much of him as we did 🙈 27. Avery | Pokémon: Sword and Shield

i cannot believe none of you guys told me about Avery, the most amazingly dressed character i've ever seen in the whole of Pokémon 🙈💖 shhhh he is so very pretty and petty and his powers are incredibly cool. i just love everything about him and would delight in helping him develop a real sense of self-esteem, because he does not deserve the dismissal he receives from his family 😭💖 28. Matthew Patel | Scott Pilgrim

oh my God, heart in my MOUTH seeing Matthew Patel get the glow-up villain arc he so desperately deserved!!!!! 😭💖💖💖 Matthew is just the epitome of style and power in Scott Pilgrim Takes Off, and it was so fantastic getting to see him grow as a character and get self-actualised. plus his fight scenes were some of the coolest things i've ever seen. Matthew can i have your number please 🥺 29. The Toymaker | Doctor Who

!!!!!!!!!! i don't know if you guys can tell, but i really love the Toymaker...and even predicted that he'd completely consume my mind months before we got The Giggle 🙈💖 e v e r y t h i n g about him just gets me so bad. his reality-bending, his teasing attitude, his ridiculous accents, his gorgeous costumes, his emotional inconsistency, his tragic backstory...god, if i so much as look at him smiling i melt 🥴💖 characters played by Neil Patrick Harris really get me!! i'm so proud to be modding a server dedicated to the Toymaker now, and have met so many brilliant, wonderful friends through him and falling back into Doctor Who!!! i think we're all going to be brainrotting over him for quite some time 😉💖 30. Dr Mark Fry | Chicken Run: Dawn of the Nugget

Dr Fry, rushing in at the finish line!!! 🤭 the second my pals saw this guys they were all spamming me, begging me to watch Dawn of the Nugget!!! and ooooh i was noooot prepared for the specific brand of soft creepy genius he is 💖 even if they'd played Dr Fry purely as your run-of-the-mill mad scientist he would've gotten me bad, but they just had to make him equal parts freaky and brilliant with just a touch of arrogance, didn't they?? Melisha scored well 🤤 (also, three whole Yorkshiremen in my collection now!! is it the accent? 😭) aaaaand that's everyone!!! phew, is anyone else out of breath? 🥵 what a wonderful, silly year of fixations this has been 🤭💖 thank you all for being here, brainrotting happily alongside me for some of these characters, and for all the other characters you love!!! i hope 2024 is awesome to you, and that many more fictional characters are around the corner, ready to make you smile 😉

[accirax]

initial thoughts on DCAS episode 11

oh my god

i had already guessed that Alec was lying (much like Jake did), but this was a really nice explanatory touch! Alec and Riya's friendship is, as usual, one of the season highlights for me.

would've been a lot more interesting if the campers could have chosen their own partners in one way or another, imo, but that would definitely eat up a lot of time in an already packed episode. plus, some pairings (like Connor and Riya) probably couldn't have happened this way, given how Riya wound up reacting to Connor.

"alright Fiore, here's how we prevent you from going home this week," one could say.

i was SO worried that Alec was going to have another confessional at some point being like "lol i was testing my acting skills on Fiore too" but he DIDN'T. which means this is CANON. THE ADOPTION IS BACK ON!!!!!!!!

okay, i actually love the decision to pair Hunter and Grett together here. both of them are the "very flawed but kinda mistreated partner of their appearances-obsessed date," so it makes sense that Hunter could give Grett a good perspective on this. also, is it just me, or did they rework Hunter's personality in this episode to be more like S2? i liked it.

i'm going to put every Fiore and Alec moment in this post and you can't stop me. i am initially thinking about them.

"joke's on you fucker i didn't teach her literally any of this. she's just built different."

as much as i enjoy Alec appreciating his daughter's sass, this does seem like a pretty radical heel turn from "i only voted Connor out of this game because it was what was best for him." i guess maybe spending time with Riya and the other villains has caused Alec to fall further off the deep end/forget about Connor's genuinely nice qualities...? or it's inconsistency between different writers, who knows.

i am 0% a jul(?) shipper, but, damn, the jul shippers were eating well this episode.

Yul is such an interesting little guy.

James flexing his character arc, we love to see it.

WHAT IS IT WITH THE CYAN WOMEN AND SECRETLY BEING JACKED????

society..... it's becoming more utopian........

see, this is why i didn't think Tess would be the one to return to the game.

Aiden is such a hater, i love him. but, overall, i agree with Lake. we're definitely sowing the seeds for a Jake redemption(/winner?) arc and a heroes' reunion.

Riya, finally finishing what she started in S2 of making the gays fall off cliffs.

villains are so fun. i love villains.

THE SOFT DAD SMILE IS BACK :D

ooh, nice callback.

this is an objectively funny screenshot. why does Alec yell like that

what a surprising outcome! (/s /lh)

:,) <3

i wish Aiden and James had more of an opportunity to talk during this episode :/ it's fine, though-- i think that James and Lake's characters were used more effectively this way.

they're getting back together after this trust me guys i'm disventure camp

YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY

they truly are family now. i love it.

"not that bad" is a weird way to describe your would-be crush.

this will be a fun scene! idk which episode "Saturday" will be, though. both because idk how many days will pass in any given episode and also bc i don't recall which day today is in canon.

i do wonder what evil Gabby is doing here. i guess maybe it'll just be the side of Gabby that wants to run with the villains alliance for power vs the side that wants to follow Ellie's advice? that seems kind of weird. maybe it'll be more like the side that wants to go mad with power on the revenge quest vs Gabby's more rational and strategic side? either way, strange cliffhanger.

can't we just have everyone here... always... all the time...? no? okay :( well, it was still really nice to get the whole gang back together for this episode. i'll look forward to seeing them again in the finale.

and, hey, Connor's back in the game now! and he can't be eliminated next episode, at least. are there going to be three players with immunity...? that could get spicy. we'll see how the heroes and villains smack down when the next real elimination rolls around. back up to ten to nine again... see you next time!

[crimswnred]

I've just gotten back home from work so I'm a little late to the party, however...

LITG SEASON 8: TEMPTING FATE — VOLUME 2: thoughts, concerns and prayers

first of all yesss more hair booooo paywall, fusebox get it together??? (at least they are pretty but again that's the bare minimum)

anyway, here's my girl with her new hair

why do all of the girls' nightwear look like I'm on a strip club and they're asking me if I want something to drink

it's so over for you Theo

honestly she's too good for him anyway

okay kiss challenge!!!! let me snog everyone

I don't want any more of that "peck" crap we want FULL ON SNOGS, TONGUE AND CHAOS

Jin: "Nap, then results?" Hamish would be so proud of him

okay, so you rate me EIGHT just so I feel like I have to pay to have one extra kiss, your game is a dirty as ever Fusebox

date time!!!! going with Jin ❤️

LMAO Jack is kinda funny

so sad to see a baddie doing too much to keep a man in love island 💔 Luna I'm so sorry you didn't deserve it your only crime was being coupled up with the one guy I want

oh. so about the terrace scene...

first of all, super sweet gem scene. it seemed like a super important one for it to be a gem scene though. so idk I'm a bit lost.

Jin is a walking red flag ��� this boy is soooo gonna flip on me when the next hot girl shows up!! but let's enjoy the ride

and Luna... girl... was it ever that serious?

the award for worst outfit design goes to 👇

and the one for BEST outfit design goes to 👇

like wow wowza mmmhmm yeah! this man is hot hot HOT 🔥🔥🔥

I had to kiss him HE IS SO FINEEEEEEEEEEE

oh, Jack is kinda sweet... if he looked more like Lewie/Alex he would be favourite boy of the season for sureeee

keep the compliments coming, darling

I had to kiss him too. you know, to be polite.

but it was just a peck, tho

okay, NOW JIN!!!

having a spicy conversation with the guy I want to fuck and his currently girl isn't how I planned to spend my afternoon but here we go

"You're adventurous. You're fun to be around. And you'd make every sight even more beautiful", "Okay. Where's the punch line?", "There isn't one :)" OKAY GAG ME WITH THE WRITING

FUNNY BOY WHO'S A HISYORY NERD? OH OKAY!!!! BIG T??? NO IT'S BIG J!!!!!! JIMOTHY!!!

lmao Sophie mixing the boys up she's so me

Claudia is a real one let me tell you that

she's nice, she doesn't force herself upon us, she's polite, she give us all the tea, and she even help us to graft on the boys behind their girls' backs. like, THAT'S MY GIRL

and if Theo doesn't step up she will DEFINITELY be mine

TIME TO PICK MY BOY LET'S GOOOOOOOO

so sad to see Luna go, I really like her :/

lmao???????????

I TAKE BACK EVERY GOOD THING I SAID ABOUT JACK WTFFFF 😭😭😭😭

he was so out of pocket ?? what's your deal man, are you jealous I picked Jin instead of you? we kissed ONCE. be sooooooooo for real rn

okay Sophie you can join your boy in this bullshit he still cheated on you with me when you weren't looking (and he probably would do it again)

no. I won't forgive you?? you were basically calling me a whore back then and now you are SORRY? don't say something you'll regret later that's not cute.

and he's supposed to be serious?

anyway, stressful night over. time to go to bed with my babygirl Jin

BITS BITS BITS BITS

29 gems to go all the way? what is this?

they could've make the scene a little longer but they have gotten way better ever since the writers dropped the word crescendo

MR TYLER WHO ARE YOU?

still not 100% sure if I'm going with Jin or Oakley but I'm leaning towards Jin, I'm not gonna lie 😁 I did some stuff that will fuck me over on movie night if fusebox finally learnt how to code (which they prolly didn't so I guess I'm safe)

I really enjoyed this episode except for the part when Jack and Sophie went full on villain mode but if the narrative made sense all of the time it wouldn't be LITG, right?

anyway, let's see what this Tyler guy is about... see you all next week 🫶

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Psycho Analysis: Dee Vasquez

(WARNING! This analysis contains SPOILERS!)

“Turnabout Samurai” was always a case I skipped on my replays, because when I originally played the game I found it to be a tedious filler case loaded with bland characters and little plot progression. On my most recent playthrough, though, I realized how wrong I was; while the case is overly long and does require some obnoxious backtracking, it’s honestly an extremely fun and funny case that really helps develop Miles Edgeworth and flesh him out as a character, which kind of makes me baffled at my initial perception of the case as pointless filler. This is no “Turnabout Big Top,” that’s for sure, and that’s all the more apparent when we uncover who the true killer is.

Dee Vasquez marks a true turning point in the killers I the franchise. Frank Sahwit and Redd White are certainly not out of place in the series, but they are both one-dimensional goofballs. Not Dee; she’s an incredibly three-dimensional villain with motivations that go beyond simple greed and an actual sympathetic motivation for her crime.

Motivation/Goals: Dee Vasquez is actually rather interesting in that her motivation for murder has one of the first twists in the series: She had no motive. The murder was an accidental one in self-defense, as the victim Jack Hammer had come to her with the intent to kill her. When he did so, she shoved him off the steps and impaled him on a fence—something Hammer himself had accidentally done to another actor five years prior.

It’s pretty interesting to think that there wouldn’t be another killing in self-defense until Spirit of Justice, and even then there’s a big twist to that too—but that’s a story for another time.

Breakdown: Fitting her terse and stoic personality, Vasquez actually has one of the single most understated breakdowns in the whole series, followed by her sadly and graciously accepting her defeat:

That really is it, and honestly, it's all she needs. Someone with her demeanor losing her composure for even a moment like that is pretty impressive.

Best Scene: Vasquez actually gets one of the most unique scenes in the franchise, as at the end of the third day of investigating she lures Maya and Phoenix into her trailer, where she proceeds to call upon her mafia goons in an attempt to “erase” them.

It’s pretty notable because the mafia goons actually get art here, and this is also the only time Vasquez’s mob connections are really brought up in any capacity as they aren’t mentioned during the trials, only getting briefly mentioned in discussions while investigating. It’s doubly notable because it gives Gumshoe one of his first “Big Damn Heroes” moments when he bursts in and saves our dynamic duo’s lives.

Final Thoughts & Score: Dee Vasquez is a really solid villain, and her case is where the series really grew the proverbial beard.

I think what’s most fascinating about her is how you only get some vague hinting at the relationships that surround the crime she committed, and the true nature of her relationship with Hammer is based entirely on hearsay from biased parties—can you trust what she says in regards to Hammer, considering she was blackmailing him and clearly had a great disdain for him for killing her possible lover? Can you trust Oldbag’s account of it being a tragic accident when she’s a Hammer superfan? It all makes her the sort of character where you can come up with multiple interpretations of her and have different levels of sympathy depending on how you view her actions. Like sure, it was in self-defense, but it becomes a lot less sympathetic if you see Hammer more as a victim of manipulation for something that wasn’t really his fault (although his willingness to frame his co-star Will Power out of petty jealousy certainly doesn’t make him look very good).

Helping this is just how grounded and low-key she is. She doesn’t really get wild, over-the-top reactions like some of the other killers, and while that may seem like a detriment in a series as silly as this, it actually makes her stand out a lot more especially with how later villains would become even more wild and wacky. It also helps build her up as a genuinely formidable opponent in court, and she’s actually a pretty tough egg to crack when you get her on the stand.

While I’m not going to pretend like she’s the greatest, most complex, or most tragic of all the villains (how can she be when characters like Ini Miney, Geiru Toneido, or Acro are around?) but for a first attempt at a more complex villain that isn’t just killing for the money, she’s a really solid one. A nice solid 7.5/10, I’d say. I think really her biggest problem is that the case immediately following hers features perhaps the single most sympathetic murderer in the original trilogy, as well as another stoic hardass villain who has a far more glorious breakdown, which leaves her being a bit overshadowed. Still, for what she is, she's a remarkably solid villain.

[elfqueen006]

Running Red

A drabble for @themeatpit37's Slasher!Jack AU ft. my OC May-Rose and "Selene," my name for human Moonpie. Basically, it's a chase scene and I hope I captured the maliciousness of the villainous Jack in this.

Wanted to draw something but summer classes and shit cutting in on my fun. Figured I could scribble this up while it was in my head between free time.

Tw: injury, implied/referenced cannibalism and gore, blood and violence, implied death of character offscreen.

---

He fought like an animal. His head dips low and to the right, surveying her from all angles before taking a running start to pounce at her. May barely makes it out the way when she jumps to the side and scrambles back up, ignoring the throbbing in her left arm. It was still scratched up from his "claws" -- some kind of filed metallic material stuck to otherwise friendly, fluffy fur gloves.

Selene was hiding like she told her. Where, she didn't know, but somehow, she felt that was the best case scenario. 'As long as Jack can't find her.' She thought.

Her thoughts were already mixed up out of focusing on survival and worry for her godchild. She didn't know how long this fight would last. She couldn't find a second of opportunity to look inside any of her ex's compartments for a gun. She recalled in college, Ian said something along the lines of hoping he'd never have to own a gun, and she mentally cursed him to his grave. If he owned a damn gun he wouldn't be dead now.

Then again, could a gun work on this... thing? Not even the chair could keep him down. What could a bullet do against supernatural evil?

Jack's big eyes looked back at her from behind his plastic lion mask. She thought they were a bright brown, but everytime his focus was her alone they were a blood red. He didn't have a problem getting on his feet, languidly rising from the floor to stalk towards her again.

"Oh, lioness," Jack purred, "You can't protect your cub forever."

Her voice impulsively lashed out, "What the hell do you want from her?"

He shrugged, "Lion's gotta eat. It's what we do . Especially when the prides getting a li-i-i-tle too big." he hopped forward a few steps in tune with his words. Mays lips rose in a snarl as she backed up. The masked man snickered, and her anger rose over fear at how easily he made their continued survival into a sick little game. Her protectiveness of Selene and hostility towards him didn't add caution but fueled his "lioness" image of her.

Something else then clicked for May -- Jack ...Joseph... whoever he was. Is not a man, nor some freak in a mask, but a caricature of his former self. Someone who's abandoned humanity and empathy for carnal desire. A mascot for terror and evil, one he assumed with glee.

May wasn't sure how she could win against something like this... but she had to try.

She turned and fucking ran. There was no direction she was going with other than away from the predator. The click of nails followed close behind. He was probably running after her on all fours - the freak.

Ian didn't have much in his living area, but whatever May could find, she threw. She threw a small alarm clock and missed. She threw a lamp that he took like a fucking pro. And in her growing frustration she took the wooden stand by the couch and swung it down with surprising force. He cried out as it hit him over his shoulder, making him stumble backward. May didn't wait for him to regain balance.

Reaching over for a glass trinket on Ian's TV shelf, she flung it toward him. It crashed into his chest and she grinned, truly vindicated when he made a pained "Augh! "

As she turned to run, Jack winced, running his hand over his broad chest. Some glass had been lodged in the skin. He clenched his teeth as he pulled it one out with his claws, then two, and three. There were some tinier shards that just couldn't be grasped, making his skin quiver in discomfort. Then his attention was drawn to the familiar and yet jarring red liquid blooming from the cuts on his skin. They came as little droplets before trickling down over the fabric of his shirt.

Experimentally, he swiped a thumb over the blood and tasted it fresh off the fabric... the same. And yet, different. How could he pin that? It was almost the same as touching yourself. You didn't know why it felt different with other people, it just did. And just like an orgasm, you know it's coming, but with others you don't know how. That was part of the fun for him. Finding out different ways to make them bleed. Every wound, every cut, every bruise would open and send him up a fountain of gushing red gold. His reward for playing a different strategy with each kill.

He knew he bled, but it was rare someone showed him how. It was exhilarating.

[tygerbug]

For better or worse, the 2023 Super Mario Bros movie very accurately translates the Nintendo video games to the big screen, offering fun and references but few surprises.

Some have defended the quirky 1993 Super Mario Bros movie by saying that the original games aren't cinematic, and aren't possible to adapt into a film. "What, do you want a movie where Mario jumps on some blocks in a raccoon suit and says Wahoo, it's-a-me, Mario?" Well, this is a movie where Mario jumps on some blocks in a raccoon suit and says "Wahoo, it's-a-me, Mario."

Will Mario, Luigi, Toad and Princess Peach be able to save the Mushroom Kingdom from Bowser, king of the Koopas? Will Mario eat some mushrooms, kick some shells, and jump on some blocks? Will fire flowers and invincibility stars provide a temporary boost in power? Will Mario drive a go-kart down a rainbow road? Will Donkey Kong throw some barrels? Is water wet? Does two plus two equal four?

It's been forty years since the Nintendo Family Computer (Famicom) hit shelves in Japan, and thirty years since the 1993 movie, made by an older generation that didn't understand the appeal of Nintendo's video games. This time round, everyone involved understands the assignment and plays it safe. I'm glad we're at that point where everyone is on the same page, even if no risks are taken with the material. There are similarities to the 1993 film but mostly it feels like you're watching one of Mario's recent video games, but as a movie. Which raises the question of what this film has to offer that a game doesn't.

For one thing, there's the character relationships. Mario doesn't have much to say in the games, but here is serviceably if blandly played by Chris Pratt, who somehow hasn't been fully cancelled yet. (See also: Fred Armisen as Cranky Kong.) We somehow get a fair amount of bonding between Mario and Seth Rogen's amusing Donkey Kong. Incidentally the events of Donkey Kong (1981) are fictional in this movie, but the events of Wrecking Crew (1984) are not.

The standout is Jack Black, giving a very Jack Black performance as the lovestruck villain Bowser, king of the Koopas. He mostly interacts with Kevin Michael Richardson, spot-on as Kamek the Magikoopa. Keegan-Michael Key plays an adventure-seeking Toad, whose part in the adventure feels underdeveloped. Charlie Day doesn't get enough to do as Luigi, mostly just looking scared in true Luigi fashion, but does well enough with what he has.

Anya Taylor-Joy plays the sweet and fiercely determined Princess Peach, who is very much a playable character here, as an overcorrection for her passive nature in most of the games. The result has Lego Movie syndrome, where it's not clear why this hyper-capable, overqualified character gets to do nothing, compared to a man with zero experience or skills. The Lego Movie also starred Chris Pratt, and both come uncomfortably close to the bigot's dream that "the best of them is lower than the worst of us." This is, at least, in line with the games, where Luigi and sometimes Peach and Toad are just as playable as Mario is, but are also not your first choice of character. But there's no reason given in the film to choose Mario over Peach, and even Peach's interest in keeping Mario around is somehow less romantic than the quick kiss he'd get at the end of a game. The film does often find things for Peach to do, including fighting Bowser herself. It also puts her in the passive role of watching Mario do something, while portraying her as overpowered compared to him, which almost feels sarcastic.

The predictable plot is not unlike the 1993 movie and 1989's The Super Mario Bros. Super Show, whose theme song is used here. Actually a lot of theme songs are used here, with the score constantly referencing themes from the games, almost at random. (In a real dick movie, Grant Kirkhope is not credited for writing the Donkey Kong Rap, with a blank space credited instead.) As in the 1993 film, the Brooklyn plumbers Luigi and Mario Mario journey into the sewers and are warped via pipe into another world, the Mushroom Kingdom, and menaced by the evil King Koopa. I'm pretty sure this has never been the actual storyline according to Nintendo of Japan (who sometimes claim that Mario is from the Mushroom Kingdom himself), but it's a key factor in American adaptations.

Otherwise this is stuff you've probably seen before in over forty years worth of video games. The attention to detail is laudable, but it's also just protecting Nintendo's corporate branding at a time when they've been doing this for over four decades, and are now expanding into theme parks. It would be an idiot move, at this point, to deliver anything that's unlike the video games. This movie would have felt like a miracle in the 80s or 90s, when anti-Japanese paranoia was still rampant among the older generations, and video games were written off as rotting kids' brains.

But coming at this with a Millennial and Gen X attitude, we know exactly who Mario is, and what he does. This is a Mario movie where you expect the expected. Of course it could have been a lot worse. The film feels a little too simple, but doesn't do anything actively wrong or bad. They had a chance here to lend a little more depth to Mario, who is barely a character, and that chance is not taken. The film zips by without much time for character development. Kids may find poetry in that, and be able to fill in the blanks, as if hours passed in these scenes rather than seconds. Adults will simply get what they paid for - a movie that feels like the Super Mario Bros video games. In particular, the New Super Mario Bros series, which upgraded the adventure to new hardware while staying very close to the old 80s formula.

Here's another metaphor for you. The Mario game series got more experimental with Super Mario RPG and the first Paper Mario, as well as the Mario & Luigi (Superstar Saga) RPG games. These introduced many unusual new characters, but the Paper Mario sequels have been progressively less experimental, presenting us instead with a lot of similar Toads and Koopas. That's also what we get in this movie - a sea of Koopas and Toads. Series creator Shigeru Miyamoto, credited as producer here, prefers it that way.

The scenes set in Brooklyn are a little stranger, filled with easter eggs and characters we don't learn much about. It's too cartoony to pass for the "real world," and is full of stuff Illumination are making up for this movie, rather than taking from the games.

I was surprised, somehow, that some animated version of Dennis Hopper's Koopa didn't show up. I think that might have been an improvement.

Not long ago, I edited an extended version of the 1993 Super Mario Bros movie, intended for an official Blu-Ray release which never happened. That film had a famously troubled production, and has some real problems with a mismatch in tone. The directors had created the cyberpunk TV series "Max Headroom" and wanted this to be a similar cyberpunk dystopia for older teenagers, while the studio heads at Disney were dismissing Mario as something for very young children. The shooting was a messy and unhappy affair, and something was lost in the edit. Meanwhile no one involved seemed to know or care very much about the actual property, which seemed impossible to translate into live action anyway. It's fanciful and cartoony, and the things Mario does in the games are things he does because it's a video game. There's no reason for him, in a movie, to be jumping on blocks and saying "Wahoo!"

The 1993 Super Mario Bros movie is very weird. The 2023 Super Mario Bros movie is a cartoon where Mario jumps on some blocks and says "Wahoo!" The latter is, obviously, much more accurate to the game. In a weird way, I think both approaches were valid. Older people actually know who Super Mario is now, so this is the movie we get. It's a kids movie, for those kids who've been playing Mario games for the past forty plus years. It's no better or worse than that. There's no false advertising here - it is exactly what it claims to be.

I can't imagine that anyone will be thrilled by a post-credits sequence teasing Yoshi, whose species already appears in the film. That's about the least surprising reveal possible, in a movie that's already devoid of surprises. A set of toys for this movie came out at McDonald's, and this is really the McDonald's hamburger of movies. Something for kids that adults can just about choke down. Well, I've got all those McDonald's toys on my desk, and if they keep making movies like this I'll probably keep watching them. I'll watch a movie with Yoshi in it, or Rosalina or Wario or whoever they add for a sequel. I just won't pretend like it's something I haven't seen before.

Rating: Fresh / Recommended

(Seen in theaters)

[thirdrootwriting]

Brother of my Brother (Infinite Crisis - Bad End) pt3

Back to Jason POV. There is some gore, torture, and gun violence in this one.

Part 1. Part 2. Part 3. Part 4.

The thing about Lex Luthor was the man had an insatiable need to stick his fingers into every available pie, the greedy capitalistic little Jack Horner pig. If some serious shit went down, there was an absolute guarantee that Luthor had started that shit, worsened that shit, or offered some incredibly condescending ' help' with that shit that was -in reality- probably just a disguised ploy to fuck with Superman.

(And holy hell, Jason could admit that he personally had raging inferiority issues, both before and after his resurrection, but the way Luthor was with Superman made his relationship with the original Robin AND Robin 3.0  look like the model of mental health by comparison).

All this in mind, if you wanted to know something and didn’t feel like trying your luck snooping around Batman's shit, the next best thing was to hop a city over to the next autocratic billionaire. Armed with that knowledge, and with the street cred of being known as one of Gotham's rouges, it's not hard to growl and posture in front of the right seedy bar-owners, fixers, and middle-men to track down a villain that's been getting cash flow from Luthor.

 People in that sort of game might be hard enough to keep their composure and claim ignorance in front of the Big Bad Bat himself, but are always willing to spill the latest gossip to a guy with a rap-sheet, well-used guns, and blood under his nails. It's how they connect thugs and D-list villains to people Luthor or Talia for use as cannon fodder, and while it's annoying as fuck to be seen as nothing more than a gun for hire, it is useful.

So useful, that only three days after reading that stupid memorial page, the Red Hood's got his gun under the chin of some little mathlete, computer nerd called the Calculator (stupid name), the guy squealing about the Secret Society of Supervillains (stupider name) that Luthor had set up with Talia, who really could do better in terms of company, and that fucking creep Deathstroke.

Three fingers shot off at point blank and one knee crunched to bony, gritty pieces under his boot, and the Red Hood's heard way more than he cares to regarding this little fun-time club of murders, their plans for a world-wide prison break (like Arkham didn't have those regularly on its own), the JLA's nasty little foray into memory alteration (the good guys pulling, morally objectionable, authoritarian shit? Say it ain't so!), and how the Luthor leading them had actually been an alternative universe fake trying to pull some sort of multiverse ending evil scheme.

Fun times all around, and the Red Hood could not give less of a shit about any of it if he tried.

Hood readjusts his weight, putting more of it on his left leg that's bearing down on the Calculator's ruined knee. The man underneath him lets out a whimpering, scream. Hood lets his gun's aim wander slowly down the guy's body, he thinks about pointing it at the fucker's crotch just to see if he'll start crying again but decides to have a bit of class and lets the muzzle rest on the Calculator's other, intact knee instead.

"That'd all be real interesting if I gave a shit about what you were getting up to Noah, but I what I want to know is how things shook out. The world's still standing right? So whose dead now that the dust's settled, and how they'd get there? That's the real question."

Hood taps the gun muzzle twice against Calculator's knee. He won't actually shoot, too much chance of hitting a blood vessel and having the guy go unconscious and useless from blood loss, but he doubts this computer geek knows that.

Way too many villains get into this gig all excited about torture, extortion, and killing with absolutely no defenses on what too do if the tables are reserved. It's always hilarious watching them shit their pants and scramble when they suddenly weren't the meanest thing in the room.

"I-, I-, the Luthor we were working with, the one from Earth-3, he ran so the heroes didn't get him, but he's dead already. He made the mistake of trying to go to ground in Gotham, and the Joker got him. Apparently the fucking clown was pissy he didn't invited to festivities, as if anyone half-way sane is willing to team up with his crazy ass." The Calculator grunts out, eyes wide and desperate as they track the gun that's poised over his one remaining knee.

Ugh, what a fool-ass rookie mistake. You only tried going to ground in Gotham if were unhinged and bloodthirsty enough to be too much of a pain in the ass to attack or you were homegrown on its cursed soil and knew how to avoid the city's resident cast of horrors. Hood's willing to guess any version of Luthor's a dangerous genius, but unless this version liked peeling people's faces off and eating them for a midday snack, he'd undoubtedly instead got eaten alive himself by Gotham's hungry jaws.

A least if the Joker got him, the guy definitely didn’t die a nice, easy death. Jason knows that with a painful certainty.

"Mmh, closer to having something actually useful to say. But hey, you went to ground in Gotham too, huh Noah, and it seems that's working out a bit better for you!"

Hood grinds his left heel down again. His boots are too thick to feel the grit of shattered bone, but he can hear the mess of tendons, viscera, and bone shards underneath the Calculator's latest, warbling scream. The guy pissed his pants right around the time Hood shot off his second finger, and the whole air would likely have the sharp mixed stinks of urine and blood if he removed his helmet.

"Was working out for you, I should say. You must be a local boy, huh?" Hood pauses, till the Calculator's eyes have refocused enough to show he's paying attention to Hood instead of his own pain.

"So, from one Gotham boy to another, how'd it shake out for our Bats? I hear our latest little Robin got out fine, and god only fucking knows that we ain't lucky enough to hope Batman got offed, but how'd birdy number 1 fare?" It's hard to resist the temptation to grind down on the man's shattered bones again, to resist pulling the trigger and making him bleed. Jason can feel himself losing control of the urge to send this piece of trash to hell where he belongs.

"How's Nightwing doing these days?"

"Nightwing and Superboy took down the machine-tower Earth-3 Luthor was using to rewrite the multiverse. I didn't see in person, but I hacked communications, and from Wonder Woman's report Luthor killed Nightwing in rage as reve-"

Hood yanks the aim of the gun up from Noah Kuttler's knee to his skull and blows his fucking brains out close range. The left side of the Calculator's face explodes into a mess of brain tissue and blood.

He gives the body a final kick, then lets himself out of the apartment that piece of trash had set up as a his hideout. It's Gotham, and the few cops not corrupt enough to ignore this are too overworked to give a shit about some villain's death, so no need to waste his time taking out the trash.

Hood slams the door of the run down apartment complex behind him, and stomps out onto the chilly streets. It's not raining, just damp and cold as Gotham usually is in the fall, so there might still be people, but Jason doesn't really give a fuck right now. Between his now-infamous helmet, his more obvious guns, and the wide shoulders he grew into, nobody's gonna mess with him as he prowls the streets.

And if they do, well, actually smashing some drug dealer or rapist shit's head against ground still it cracks like a bloody egg sounds like a good time with the mood he's in.

Hood makes it four blocks, not thinking about where's he going and not lucky enough to pass someone dumb enough to try starting shit with him, before he can even think above the cold, angry, itching boiling beneath his skin.

He needs a plan, he needs to do something, do anything. Jason will boil himself alive in his own itching skin with his rage if he has to just sit on it. He'd planned to kill whoever had murdered Nightwing, figured it would be some hot-shot that got a lucky hit in the chaos of battle, or some too clever for their own good smarmy loser who'd gotten an advantage by holding a little side-kick hostage.

Jason could have worked off his rage on giving them a death that was almost as slow they'd deserved for taking someone like his brother from him and Gotham, and finally proved, that at least in this respect, he was better than Rob-, than Nightwing. He might not be so nice, so naturally talented, so charismatic, but he could have proved himself better in this and given Dick's death the closure a good person like him deserved.

He realizes his loud, angry walk has taken him close to the warehouses of the harbor, the drafty old buildings three times as likely to be housing some sort of illegal goings-on as they are to be housing shipping containers.

His- his- second time heading out as Robin with Nightwing, had been around here.

Jason had jumped into a drug-processing scheme too early, nearly ruined the bust. Nightwing had to swoop in and rescue him - though instead of cracking heads, the annoying prick had just flashed a fake, movie-star smile and sweet-talked the guards and drug processors into letting them walk out.

He'd scolded Jason a bit afterwards, but taken the sting out of it by inviting him along on the real bust later that night. Afterwards he'd shot Robin a much gentler, beaming real smile and told him 'good job'. Then he'd ruined that soft, tingly feeling of pride at being treated like an equal by Nightwing, by prodding and whining until Jason had reluctantly let Dick buy him ice-cream.

Dick had flavor palate of a little kid in regards to sweets, and he'd gotten whipped cream and sprinkles on his. Jason had made fun of him for being 17 and eating like a 7 year old, and-

Jason's nearly twenty now, older than Dick had been when they first met. He's right near the age Dick was when Jason had died, a funny sort of parallelism.

Hey, with the way he's getting on with the family right now, chances are Jason will also miss his brother's funeral. How fuckin' hilarious is that?

He leans his head against one of the warehouse's outer walls and laughs. It comes out monstrous and distorted through his helmet's speakers. His gloved hands can't find purchase on his jacket's shoulders to rip up his own skin and let out some of the anger inside.

Anger and maybe not anger. His face feels wet and he's still laughing a bit. Whatever Jason's feeling it's bad, and he wants it gone. Needs to do something, anything for this feeling to be gone.

He doesn't know what to do though, and the unbearable tide of it swells and suddenly and desperately Jason can't help himself from thinking he wants to be 13 years old again getting painlessly snatched out of the air by Nightwing with a trapeze artist's instincts for a fall about to go wrong. He wants to be 14, half-asleep on a mountain-lodge couch on his first ever family vacation as his brother quietly tells his father Jason's a good kid, with the softest tone he's ever heard Dick aim at Bruce.

He wants to be 15 with this same unbearable angerfeargrief that is drowning him now swelling and calling his brother, his Robin, Bruce's first son, the only person in the world that might understand how he's feeling. The phone won't pick up, and he'd known that, known that the Titans were in space all distant and unreachable, but he'd still called.

Jason had still had a brother to call, and the promise that maybe someday it would connect.

He dials Dick Grayson's current civilian number on numbs fingers.

"The number you are attempting to reach is not in service."

Jason hits redial. He can't say why, the call's not magically gonna go through this time.

"The number you are attempting to reach is not in service."

He redials the number manually, staring hard at the screen to make sure each button press is pulling up the correct number.

"The number you are attempting to reach is not in service."

Once more, repeating the phone number out loud to make sure he's remembering it correctly.

"The number you are attempting to reach is not in service."

"The number you are attempting to reach is not in service."

"The number you are attempting to reach is not in service."

[zdbztumble]

Yet Another Kingdom Hearts Revisit, Part VII

I can't speak to what the Japanese version of Kingdom Hearts is like, but the English version has always done a brilliant job capturing Jack Skellington's voice. His dialogue reflects every facet of his character: elegant, theatrical, polite, delusional, and just a little pompous. Ooogie Boogie's always been on point too, speaking like the bullying but jazzy slob that he is. And this spot-on character writing is used in an original story! As far as adapting the flavor of a particular Disney movie in the writing - this Disney movie, at a time when the company still treated it like the ugly stepchild - Halloweentown is one of the best.

Visually, it's much less successful. I've never liked the look of Halloweentown in KH I, with its harsh reds and purples and copious amounts of ugly brown. On playing the game again, it might be my least favorite world aesthetically in the game, and the only reason it's not dead last for the entire series is because Port Royal in KH II looked even worse. Port Royal also doesn't have the saving grace that is Oogie's house, which I do think is well-designed. I wish it stuck around even after you defeat him, but I appreciate how that works out story-wise, and it's a fun area to climb and explore while it lasts. The gambling den is the highlight of the house, and the more fun and engaging stage of the fight with Oogie.

And you better believe that I fight him with Jack in my party. His movement and combat suit him just as well as his dialogue, and like Aladdin in KH I's Agrabah, Jack makes the Top 3 for my favorite party members in the series (Ariel's the other, for all the reasons I gave for appreciating Atlantica last time). Having Oogie fight you through gambling first, then a runaway possession by the powers of darkness, is a nice break from the more direct villains that precede him (Hades excepted).

Storywise, Halloweentown is the closest a non-Pooh world comes to being "filler." It's not - it's a world on the brink of destruction that needs saving just like the rest, and Oogie's in the League of Disney Villains - but none of the cutscenes build on the larger story or the lore the way every previous world does. It's the most self-contained adventure within the larger framework of "we must rescue Disney from darkness." I don't raise that as a complaint, though. It's rather nice to have a lighter world at this point in the game.

Neverland is much more embedded into the larger story, and it's an extremely well-written one. And yet I don't have too much to say about it; its virtues so far as driving Riku along the path to darkness, taking another step toward explaining what's up with Kairi, and giving Sora another step up in his hero's journey, are self-evident. And it's another world where the voice of a particular Disney character (Captain Hook in this case) is captured flawlessly. I don't think I fully appreciated how well he's handled before, but as far as lines and facial animation go, he may now be my favorite of the Disney villains used in this game.

Gameplay-wise, my biggest frustration with Neverland is that there's really one one combat area where you can really take off with flight. I'm sure the claustrophobia of the ship was by design, and I don't mind so much of the action taking place within the Jolly Roger, but it would be great to have a second open space where you can fly around unencumbered for regular combat.

Of course, you can fight Phantom in an open space, and I really love this boss. It was a nightmare fighting him the fist time I ever picked up this game, but as soon as you figure out his orb, it's easy (in principle, at least) to know what to do. It's not even that hard to beat him with a full party as long as you're willing to be generous with Stop magic. But he is still a challenge, and like with Kurt Zisa, I like that he demands a good mix of magic and physical attacks. I get why later games opted for more elaborate fights with main villains in lieu of these kinds of one-off Heartless fights, but I do miss them.

[grasshopperdoingdogpaddle]

People are asking for random ratings from people so I request a ranking of Chase Young's top 5 attempted murders

Not sure what criteria to use to rank attempted murder... but I'm game?

A lot of the time Chase doesn't bother with actually trying to merk someone since he'd rather use them as pawns or intimidate and rule over them. So I'll only use the genuine, unambiguous times he was definitely trying to end someone's life on-screen.

5 - Jack, by trying to crush him with a boulder

The best part about this one was all the facial expressions we got. From Chase's smug smile as he says he's "finally about to get rid of him" to the look of absolutely shock and disappointment he shares with Wuya when Jack manages to get up. It’s golden, especially coming from someone as composed as Chase. It feels almost like a Swiper "aw man" moment, but about murder instead of petty theft.

He's pretty flippant about holding a life in his hands. He revels in it, in fact, says that Spicer’s painful death has been a long time coming. So seeing him so confused at not actually pulling it off was funny. This isn’t someone who’s used to messing up his assassinations.

Also, it's quite cute how the Xiaolin monks were the ones who saved Jack from this untimely fate.

4 - Raimundo, by almost biting him in half

It is a good thing Clay is a quick thinker, because Chase was really going for it. He was fully primed to bite someone in half for trying to take back Omi. 

It gives us confirmation that Chase will eat a human without hesitation, and the moment had some excellent tension in it. A nice quick show of the bond between the monks and how hard they try for each other.

A nice glimpse of how Chase's thoughts, too. The look on his face switching from that smug smirk as he caught the punches, into the murderous glare right before he shifted his dragon form, is very interesting to read into. It’s fun to get that occasional reminder that Chase is capable of being very brutal and evil, just in case him burning down that entire village for a laugh and plunging the world into darkness doesn’t quite doing it.

3 - Guan, by pushing him in the pit of fire

The first time we really see how far Chase is willing to go. It was a neat way to set the tone for what kind of villain Chase Young is, and the scene is definitely harsher in hindsight once we learn the history between Guan and Chase.

The other monks all on the sidelines reacting with such abject horror, and the visible beads of sweat on Guan's face while he struggles, before he finally managed to free himself just in time... This fight felt fun and intense to watch.

2 - Hannibal (disguised as Clay), by pinning him down and trying to stab him in the face

The only time on this list where I was actually rooting for Chase.

Usually Chase’s staff has blades at its ends, so I assume Chase was about to shoot out the blades and stab Hannibal? I’m not entirely sure that would even work on Hannibal, but Chase sure hoped it would.

This whole scene was such a great use of dramatic irony. It hurts all the more that this was their last chance at preventing the evil that is Hannibal Roy Bean from being released into the world and the monks themselves accidentally got in the way. Chase waiting by the temple gate and Ying-Ying being so happy to see Hannibal again that she flies straight to him really elevates the moment. It establishes a lot of interesting dynamics in just a minute.

1 - Dojo, by almost making him into Lao Mang Lone Soup

I love Dojo but this was just too hilarious.

Dojo sat in a simmering pot of soup and still needed more hints to figure out what was happening here. 

Chase introduced himself into the story by getting ready to murder Dojo’s legendary dragon, and he even makes a thinly-veiled threat to throw the monks into the soup and eat them, too. 

The usually cautious and skittish Dojo has lost his sense of self-preservation because he was given a nice cookie. And Chase has been planning this for apparently so long. Comedy gold, truly.

The animosity between Chase and Dojo is set up and stays consistent for the whole rest of the series after this. Chase puts the blame for his finale plan falling apart squarely on the fact that he was robbed of the chance to eat Dojo then and there.

[dynamistimaeus]

This post is about to get long, so I added a ‘read more’. I was working on this back in December of last year (2022). Though, I am now sharing my thoughts and ‘theories’ as the HS2 writing team has changed and the story will go a slightly different direction.

I want to compile my thoughts involving the Homestuck Epilogues and Homestuck^2. Not necessarily just my opinions of it, but some things I noticed. More of an in-depth analysis, along with some of my own commentary and several ‘theories’.

There was originally a post that sparked this interest; however, I no longer have it and I don’t want this to become a debate. The person was voicing their opinion and that is totally fair and fine! They are in the right to do that. My thoughts on it still remain, though, as it got me thinking and theorizing more deeply. Something akin to igniting the fire, so to speak. While I don’t think opinions on fictional media are right or wrong, they are still just that, opinions. This being said, I feel like sometimes fandom runs with opinions and considers it factual (or canon) when in reality it really isn’t. At the end of the day, an opinion of something, and even theories, are still just those things. The important thing is that it is actually a good thing that someone can formulate their own opinions about media, and art, in general. Art is subjective and even if there is a very specific message to something, at the end of the day, if it can evoke something in you and make you think deeper.. Then, that is impressive and honestly really normal. It should draw some emotion from you, hence why it is subjective. You look at it from your own lens and determine what it means to you, using your own personal truths. Now, onto the fun part.

While I was thinking about what this individual said, it made me reconsider certain story elements. They had made a comment that Rose would have been a more interesting villain, and that is fair; however, technically, if you consider Ult Dirk a villain, then Rose would be too. Sometimes I think people forget that Dirk and Rose are similar (like how Roxy and Dave are), and this also goes into Jake and Jade being similar and the qualities that both Jane and John/June share too. For the record, I don’t necessarily consider Ult Dirk a villain, and it is definitely fine if you do; however, this goes a little into my theories surrounding things. In all regards, I think the fictional version of Ult would be more of a morally grey character, possibly someone that would fit better in an ‘anti-hero’ sort of role, since he clearly believes what he is doing is the ‘right’ thing to do. Furthermore, I believe his character always had the possibility of becoming this way and not necessarily ‘becoming what he hates,’ but someone that can control things and ‘fix’ things. We see a lot in the comic that Dirk pushes his friends in odd ways to show he cares. By extension, Bro Strider also tries to do these things— and, a side note here.. I saw someone make a theory about Bro trying to turn Dave into a Dirk splinter.. But the canonical points of Homestuck disprove that theory.. In that Dave doesn’t have a heart shirt as a kid because Bro is a Prince of Heart.. He has a heart shirt, because John has a spades shirt.. So on and so forth. It is just a nod back to the card suites, as well as the trolls quadrants. Along with this, Bro Strider— as a Dirk adjacent being, would be doing what he ‘thinks’ is best. We even see Dirk mirror this kind of behavior with his creation of Brobot to ‘strife’ with Jake to ‘prepare and train’ him better. In Dirk’s mind, he was doing what was ‘best’ or ‘correct’. And, even if it is bad what he was doing.. It is oddly his way of showing he cares. Furthermore, Bro Strider, with the knowledge from Lil Cal (and those inhabiting him) definitely tries to create the scratch or attempts to ‘delay’ or ‘end’ the game however he can.. We see him battle Jack. Bro Strider was technically one of the only Beta Guardians that actively tries to interfere with the game, while Grandpa Harley seems to have his own agenda and hand in things— we learn more about this when it comes to Hiveswap. Grandpa Harley has some very deeply rooted ties with the cherubs and their magic, as well as many other links back to the game.. But this post isn’t about that, so I will save that for a different time.

Back to looking at Rose’s character for a moment. I want to make it clear that Rose has always had the ability to dig deeper into the narrative and the game as a whole. Her seer powers allow that. The original post I mentioned, also explained this well. They made the comments about Alpha Mom. While the guardians are really interesting and helpful to give us insight on the kids.. I also want to reiterate the kids aren’t the guardians. And, in my mind, I am of the impression that they may share the aspect with their alternate timeline self, but not the class.. I made this theory from looking at the trolls: The dancestors and decendants— they all share the same aspect, but not the same class. With this information, I started to dig a bit deeper.. Which brings me to some other interesting finds.

Some of the kids share some aspects with the trolls, and even with the cherubs. Now, before I get more into that, I want to brush up on my theories involving HS^2 and the turns some of the characters took.. First, starting with Dirk. It has been a bit since I read the story of Timaeus, but I already have a few correlating ties back to it and the turn Dirk’s character takes. Within the story of Timaeus, as Plato writes it.. Eventually, the character of Timaeus begins to take over the narrative completely. The full story never was finished, as Plato died prior to finishing the dialogues, but I think this is important.. It plays back into a few other things involving Dirk’s character too, but I don’t want to stay on this, as I have a lot of other thoughts to unpack. Now, another interesting thing about Dirk, and more specifically Bro Strider, is the ties they have with Kamina from Gurren Lagaan. Unsure of how many of you have seen the anime, but Kamina— one of the main characters, goes by the nickname of ‘Bro’, especially to the younger character Simon. Now, some of the methods Kamina uses to ‘help Simon’ basically.. Deal with the destroyed version of the world, aren’t ideal.. But a lot of the things Kamina does in that show are very identical to things Dirk, and Bro Strider, do in regards to the game.. And, well, end of the world, essentially. Along with this, Roxy (and adjacently) Mom Lalonde share a lot of qualities with Yoko from that show.. From the scarf to the amazing rifle action. Also, the weirdly overly fetishization of female characters that happened in the 90’s.. It was bad, and it even shows with Roxy a bit.. Her personality is also a little similar to Yoko’s.. Though, the other interesting thing about this is that Jake shares some qualities of her too.. The shorts, the guns, the infamous kissing in front of a volcano.. You know, among other things.. But I think Jake having more ties back to Indiana Jones and Laura Croft make a bit more sense.. Considering Grandpa Harley.. And, the fact Hussie has started they weren’t really sure what to do with Jake’s character for a while— sidenote: I love Jake and want to see him fully use his Hope powers.. But I’ll brush up on this a little more as I unpack some things..

I think the Epilogues and Homesuck^2 are.. Kind of replaying the events of things that happened with the trolls’ ancestors.. To the way Jane is becoming Condy.. Even her ties to Gamzee. It makes me think of the relationship between Condy and GHB.. Even the fact Jane, a human, is with a troll to the side, but is fine with destroying the rest. Condy was with a human because ‘he made her laugh,’ but was fine with destroying anyone else. With this, we even see in one timeline (the Candy one) that Karkat becomes a lot like the Signless, which makes sense, especially if Jane is filling the role of Condy. There isn’t a kid that shares the Rage aspect as Gamzee, so I wondered if this was why they ‘brought him back’.. But that doesn’t explain Vriska, because Rose technically shares a classpect with her and still is alive within both timelines.. Though, interestingly enough, Terezi’s relationship with Rosebot in the Meat timeline mirrors her past relationship with Vriska, as well as that of Redglare and Mindfang.. Now, this is the interesting thing.. Jake would then technically be in the same shoes as Cronus and Eridan if it was following this trend, but he isn’t. He’s an outlier.. Though, on the other hand, John/June being a breath player.. I think that is why they will ultimately still ‘be the hero’ in all of this. Having ties back to Tavros’ ancestor, and what that entails involving the Signless. We also only see John/June in the candy timeline, as it is believed they died within the meat one.. Upon being sent back.. Now, even more interestingly.. Dave shares an aspect with Aradia and her ancestor and dancestor.. Which we see Davebot currently traveling along with Aradia.. But he also shares an aspect with Caliborn, being the same ‘color’ of the cherub swirls.. Also, think of the parallels here of Lord English and The Handmaid… Which also brings me to the fact that Jade and Calliope also share an aspect (as well as Kanaya; however, she never goes Godtier).. And, the color scheme of Jade fits closely with Calliope.. In the Meat timeline, they have merged together— to an extent.. Which makes me wonder if Davebot and that Jade will eventually have to fight one another? Would Davebot win or would that version of Calliope be the actual winner? Since, as we know, Calliope was the one who was supposed to win between the two cherubs, which was the reason the session was doomed.. As Caliborn takes over entirely (becoming Lord English). I also would like to point out that Aradia accidentally left Sollux behind somewhere… Will he eventually become a power source for Jane? Just some random thoughts. I’m still digging into things.. But I do think some of the characters going the routes they do make sense more in this context.

Last notes, I also believe the reason Roxy (within the Meat timeline) is fine with executing Ult Dirk. When they talk to Dave about it, he seems uncomfortable about it (reasonably so), but Roxy doesn’t.. They also share an aspect with Equius (and we all know about his ancestor)…

Anyways, this is all of my findings for now. I’ll continue updating as I find more things to discuss (and have the energy to do so).

[kimium]

Tell us about your favourite ship/ships for Leona Kingscholar👀

Hi friend! Thanks so much for asking me this! I'm always excited to write about my Twisted Wonderland ships. I'm ranking them based on my silly little categories, so don't take this too serious.

Let's get started!

My favourite ships with Leona Kingscholar (Twisted Wonderland)

I Really Like These Ships

Leona/Malleus

This was actually my first Twisted Wonderland ship. When you start the game you pick a dorm and a character within it. I went with Diasomnia and Malleus as Maleficent is my favourite Disney villain (mostly due to her role in Kingdom Hearts). Thus, Malleus's ceremonial robe vignette was the first one I saw. In it, Malleus's robes are accidentally swapped with Leona's when picked up from being cleaned. The second half of the vignette shows that they have a rather antagonistic relationship with one another. It's a dynamic I instantly liked and I immediately shipped them.

Later, when I played through Book Two I started to see how Leona and Malleus are foils to one another. Their contrast between Malleus crown prince and Leona the second prince with an inferiority complex compelled me. I want to see more of their interactions with one another and if those interactions end up with some unresolved sexual tension, so be it.

Leona/Ruggie

I'll admit, I didn't like this one for a while. Mostly because my favourite dynamic between prince and attendant (Ruggie is an attendant in many ways) is loyalty. Ruggie is loyal to Leona, but it's closer to an employee/employer loyalty. That being said, I understand that both have trouble being honest about their feelings (Leona with his inferiority complex and tsundere attitude. Ruggie who has to survive with his own wits and cunning.). I can see them growing closer, talking their feelings out privately, and getting together. Though, my favourite dynamic between them is Leona "Actually Ruggie is MINE and I May Not Flaunt it Publicly, but if ANYONE Tries to Take Him From Me, They're Toast" Kingscholar. A little possessiveness dashed into the ship is a 10/10 for me.

I think these ships are Fun

Leona/Jack

Look, I am always a little weak to a ship where one looked up to one another, found out they weren't 100% what they thought, and instead of being disappointed frowned, grabbed the other by the shirt and said "I know you can be better so I'm going to MAKE SURE you live up to that potential." I love the idea of Jack's eager persistence and values of hard work and determination lighting a fire under Leona. I love that Jack sees Leona for who he can be and doesn't care about any of the extra "weight" Leona feels he carries. I love the idea of Jack seeing so much good and potential in Leona that it makes Leona want to live up to Jack's ideals.

Leona/Vil

Like with Malleus, Leona and Vil are a fun ship because they're character foils. Leona is a lazy genius who, besides the throne, has everything he could ever want but is crippled by his inferiority complex. Vil, who is brilliant, smart, and worked hard to get himself where he wants, also suffers an inferiority complex. Leona turns to apathy to escape the burning, twisting pain of always being compared to Farena. Vil turns to jealousy, consistently and silently comparing himself to Neige, putting a mask of success and glamour over his fear of always being second best. I think these two could learn a lot from one another and grow from their similarities and differences.

The only reason why this ship is lower on my list is because I'm absolute Rook/Vil trash. Though, I am not opposed to a threesome between Leona/Rook/Vil.

Cute Concept, I see where people are coming from

Leona/Idia

To me this is a ship of "opposites attract". Leona is very confident in his powers, abilities, and skills (when his inferiority complex related to Farena isn't in the way). He's not afraid of being in the spotlight and if people are pissed off at him, Leona will not back down from beating the shit out of them. Leona is also a natural born leader, even if he employs "tough love" methods.

On the other side we have Idia who when not behind a screen is an introvert and awkward with people. Yes, he's also talented and a genius but Idia's confidence and people skills only come out when he's in his element.

My favourite way of seeing them get together is having them play chess. I know at first Idia would try to escape playing with Leona, terrified to be in the same room but as he grows comfortable Idia's talking smack as they play. Sure, some of his terms fly over Leona's head (Idia cannot turn off the gamer terminology) but I bet he's ecstatic that Idia's not backing down from the challenge.

But Do I Ship Yuu with Leona?

Yes, I do. Leona was my first SSR for both dorm and event card (Fairy Tale Gala) so he has always held a special place in my heart. I also think Yuu's first encounter with Leona is hysterical. I love the idea that Yuu is not afraid of Leona simply because they have NO CLUE who he is. This lack of fear is refreshing to Leona who after realizing it's not bravado, that Yuu truly isn't afraid of him, is hooked. It will take Leona a while to figure out that he -likes- Yuu but a little bit of jealousy and possessiveness would probably rear its head within Leona eventually. Yuu's -his- herbivore, damn it.

And there you have it, friend! I hope you like my answers!! Feel free to let me know which are your favourite Leona ships!

[viktormaru]

Please explain your Borderlands opinions, but to someone who doesn't know much about Borderlands at all. I do want to hear!

there are so many about so many specific things so I'll just rate the base games for you after a brief explanation of why you should give it a try

its a run and gun game with no fall damage

ok with that out of the way- just kidding. Borderlands is a coop (or solo) shooter RPG in this post apocalyptic-ish scenario that has the Random Ass humor that is kinda great actually, so you can usually burn hours in it with tons of fun. It has this "randomizer" weapon system with different stats and stuff and differect characters with different skills and skill trees so its pretty fun all around.

With that being said here's my rating and why

Borderlands 2 > Tales from the Borderlands > Borderlands 3 > Borderlands the Prequel > Borderlands 1

I know, controversial, let me explain

BORDERLANDS 2: Please play it, its such a good game and has one of the best video games villains ever, Handsome Jack, who says very iconic lines such as "I will pay you to kill yourself". The story is fun, the characters are fun, the gameplay is fun, Borderlands 2 is the peak of the series.

TALES FROM THE BORDERLANDS: this is kinda cheating bcs Tales was made by telltale games and its a choice based game and not a shooter, but the characters are so entertaining and the story so good I rate it super high anyway. Heres the one to play if you dont like shooters, though this one is set after BL2 so it might get a bit confusing without context.

BORDERLANDS 3: I know I shouldnt rank it this high because my god the story SUCKS and the character assassination happening here is brutal, but the gameplay really has reached peak with the movement and the gunplay and stuff. I only played with FL4K though so IDK how fun the other characters are to play but hey, the DLCs are pretty good so that also raises the game in my tierlist

BORDERLANDS THE PREQUEL: It didnt do anything criminal tbh, I jsut didnt like the Oxygen mechanics they added, it kinda pisses me off a little bit. Fun characters though!! Like very much so! The story is alright, its about how Handsome Jack became who he is but... well... they dont introduce anything new really so it sits in the alright spot

BORDERLANDS: i misspelled is as boredlands while typing and had a laugh. Look, I still havent maanged to beat the game bcs its so old and clunky it was making me have a Gamer Rage moment. I shall review this tierlist once I finish it.

But seriously, borderlands its weird and quirky and edgy and fun and U should def give it a try... or at least watch a compilation of characters saying dumb shit

[madara-coroguarde]

SHIT I FORGOT SOME STUFF ABOUT THE HEADCANONS I GOTTA FINISH IT. MY OCD COMPELS ME.

- THE MAD HATTER CAME INTO EXISTENCE WHEN ALLY WAS BORN. SHE WAS THE BLACK KNIGHT (AKA SIR COROGUARDE) BEFORE SHE WAS THE HATTER. WHEN THE OLD HATTER DIED (ILL LET YOU GUESS HOW THAT HAPPENED) THE QUEEN NOTICED HER AND DECIDED SHED BE A GOOD HATTER

- ALLY'S FULL NAME IS ALICIA RENEE STETSON

- IN THIS VERSION THE CONNECTION BETWEEN THE HATTER AND ALLY IS COMPLICATED. THE HATTER HAS AN OBSESSION WITH ALLY AND THE ALICE LINEAGE (NOT. ROMANTIC.) AND HAS MENTALLY BOUND ALLY TO HERSELF. SHE TAKES PSYCHOLOGICAL DAMAGE EVERY TIME SHE HURTS ALLY, EMOTIONALLY OR PHYSICALLY (examples: when she insults Ally at the tea party and is nearly sobbing by the end of it)

- LET ME BE VERY SPECIFIC ABOUT THE HATTER AND HER PLAN. IN THIS VERSION, SHE SUCCEEDED IN BEHEADING THE QUEEN OF HEARTS AND TOOK OVER THE QUEEN'S THRONE. SHE PLANS TO MURDER ALLY AND END THE ALICE LINEAGE BUT IS EXTREMELY ANXIOUS ABOUT HER ABILITIES TO DO THAT BEFORE THE RABBIT HOLE OPENS UP AGAIN. WHY DOES SHE WANT TO END THE ALICE LINEAGE? SO ALLY'S FUTURE DAUGHTER DOESN'T FALL INTO WONDERLAND AND END HER REIGN OF GIRLBOSS TERROR.

- also my little things about the characters' mental states and identifications

Ally herself has schizophrenia and thinks the whole Wonderland thing is a hallucination until she arrives at the Mad Tea Party. she's 11 years old, cisfemale, and aroace because yes. she loves her mom, her mouse Arctus, and doesn't know or give a shit who her dad is. She's the newest generation of the Alice Lineage, aka a long bloodline that can be traced back to Alice Liddell (each generation has a daughter who falls down the Rabbit Hole at 11 years old.) She's friends with Jack, slightly exasperated by the Cheshire Cat's shit, terrified of the Queen, even more terrified of the Mad Hatter, and appreciative of the White Rabbit for being the only mildly reasonable person in Wonderland.

Jack is the White Knight who lives on the Board, a part of the Land Beyond the Looking Glass that (you guessed it) is a chess board. He was best friends with the Black Knight, Sir Coroguarde, before he disappeared. He is Ally's self-appointed guardian and was the second one to talk to her after she fell. He's basically Ally's bodyguard, constantly annoyed by the Cheshire Cat, intimidated by the Queen, completely done with the Hatter, and just tolerant of the Rabbit. like, "yeah, you definitely exist, bud"

Charlie the Cheshire Cat lives in Candyland. Surprisingly he's allowed to be a political force even though he doesn't do shit. He basically wanders around the river invisible and waits for people to silly gaslight. After Ally outsmarts him with the power of 5th grader, he helps her do stuff sometimes. Also he totally only attends the Mad Tea Party so he can ogle the Hatter. he has the same relationship with every single person in Wonderland: "lmao yeah sure buddy go off", except his bestie the Hatter.

Wright the White Rabbit lives in the mainland of Wonderland, rushing about and being an impatient little fucker. He overbooks himself horribly and is constantly arriving at his various affairs sweaty and barely breathing. He arrives at the tea party literally the second that the Mad Hatter finishes her villain song and makes a big fuss over the insulting game. He is sympathetic towards Ally, has a "friend of my friend" relationship with Jack, completely done with the Hatter, scared of the Queen, about to stab the Cheshire Cat for his silliness, and. anxiety.

Madara the Mad Hatter lives in the Land Beyond the Looking Glass. She runs the Mad Tea Party every single day (fun fact: the time in every part of Wonderland is exactly 22 seconds past 1:27 PM) and generally causes shenanigans. As detailed by Jack, she's the second most powerful figure in Wonderland. She eventually succeeds in her plan to behead the Queen and become the ruler of Wonderland. Currently plotting Ally's demise. She hates Ally's fucking guts, is besties with the Cheshire Cat, has a 🙄 towards the Rabbit, is life partners with Morris, and usually fakes innocence around the Queen till her death. Aside from being clinically insane, she suffers from particularly gory hallucinations caused by mercury poisoning. She actually does make hats.

Morris the March Hare is the Mad Hatter's dearest and most faithful servant. He's also definitely more than a little in love with her. He would do anything that he is asked. By anyone. Without question. Without remorse. Without hesitation. Without a napkin. He would literally commit bioterrorism if the Mad Hatter told him to. He has no relationship with anyone except her. He's just 😐 with common folk

i would love to talk about the Queen of Hearts but this took two hours

[phantom088]

Days 12, 13, 14, and last but not least, 15 of commanding an AI to Make Danny Phantom Fanfics

I'm so sorry, I keep getting busy and not having time to post on Tumblr, but here we are, a little time and 4 brand new AI generated Danny Phantom fanfics, I hope y'all enjoy!

Story 1: Write me a Danny Phantom fanfic where Danny has the best day of his life.

Danny Phantom woke up feeling a sense of excitement he hadn't felt in a while. It was the weekend and there were no ghosts to fight, no villains to stop, and no school projects to worry about. Today was going to be the best day ever.

He got out of bed and looked out the window. The sun was shining and the birds were singing. Danny decided that he was going to go on an adventure. He dressed in his casual clothes, grabbed his backpack, and headed out into the bright day.

As he walked down the street, he came across a group of kids playing basketball. They invited him to join in, and Danny was happy to accept. He had always loved playing sports, but with his ghost powers, he had to be careful not to use them during games. Playing without his powers was a refreshing change, and he felt like a regular kid again.

After a fun game of basketball, Danny decided to head to the park. As he strolled through, he noticed a group of people doing some kind of performance. He got closer and saw that it was a circus. Danny loved the circus, but he hadn't been to one in years. He decided to stay and watch.

The performers were amazing, and Danny was in awe of their skills. His favorite act was the tightrope walker. The performer was so skilled that he looked like he was floating on air. Danny couldn't take his eyes off the performer and was completely mesmerized.

After the circus, Danny decided to go to his favorite ice cream shop. The owner was a friendly old man who always had a smile on his face. Danny ordered his favorite flavor and sat down to enjoy it. The ice cream was so good that Danny decided to order another scoop.

As he walked home, Danny couldn't help but feel happy. It had been a long time since he had such a carefree and relaxing day. He felt like he was on cloud nine.

As he entered his house, his parents greeted him with a surprise. They had constructed a new ghost portal for him to use. It was a gift for all his hard work fighting ghosts, and they wanted him to have the best tools for the job.

Danny was thrilled. Not only had he had the best day ever, but he also had the best parents ever. He went to bed that night with a huge smile on his face, thinking about all the adventures that were yet to come.

Story 2: Write me a Danny Phantom fanfic that revolves around Cujo.

Danny was already having a pretty bad day when he heard a loud growling coming from the outskirts of Amity Park. He was out on patrol as his ghostly alter ego, Danny Phantom, trying to keep the town safe from any ghostly threats.

When he arrived at the source of the growling, he was surprised to find a massive dog-like ghost with fire in his eyes staring back at him. It was Cujo, one of the most ferocious and powerful ghosts he had ever encountered.

Danny's first instinct was to fight back, but he quickly realized that Cujo wasn't attacking him on purpose. The ghost dog was in pain, writhing on the ground and howling in agony.

Danny carefully approached Cujo, trying to figure out what was wrong. It didn't take long for him to see that the ghost dog was covered in terrible burns and wounds, as if he had been in a deadly battle recently.

Despite the danger, Danny decided to help Cujo. He used his ghostly powers to heal the wounds as best he could, soothing the ghost dog with his gentle touch. Cujo slowly calmed down, his eyes losing their fiery glow.

As Danny turned to leave, he heard the sound of footsteps approaching. It was Jack Fenton, his father, who had been tracking the ghostly energy in the area to find Danny.

"What are you doing here, son? And why are you helping that ghost?" Jack asked, surprised.

Danny explained what had happened, and Jack's attitude softened. "Well, I guess it's good to see that you still have a heart for those in need, even if they're ghosts," he said.

The two of them helped Cujo back to the Fenton lab, where Danny and his parents worked together to create a special device that would help heal the ghost dog's injuries more quickly.

As Cujo healed, he became more and more friendly towards Danny and his family. Despite his formidable appearance, the ghost dog was actually quite gentle and grateful for their help.

Soon, Danny found himself spending more and more time with Cujo, playing fetch and going on adventures together. The other ghosts in Amity Park soon learned to fear the duo, as Cujo's powerful abilities combined with Danny's ghostly powers made them an unstoppable force.

In the end, Danny realized that even the most ferocious ghosts could have a soft side. And as for Cujo, he had found a new home and a new friend in Danny Phantom.

Story 3: Write me a funny Danny Phantom fanfic that involves Jack

Danny Phantom: Jack's Latest Experiment (and yes, this is what the AI titled the fanfic)

It was a typical Saturday morning at the Fenton household when Jack decided it was time for his latest experiment. He had been working on a new invention that he was sure would make ghost hunting even easier. However, Danny and his friends were skeptical of Jack's latest invention.

"What's this one supposed to do?" Tucker asked, eyeing the contraption warily.

"It's my latest invention for capturing ghosts," Jack proudly proclaimed. "It's a new and improved Fenton Ghost Net!"

"Um, Dad, that's just a laundry basket tied to a broomstick," Danny deadpanned.

"Exactly! It's genius!" Jack exclaimed, ignoring his son's sarcasm.

"Uh, Jack, are you sure that's a good idea?" Maddie asked, eyeing the makeshift ghost net with concern.

"Of course it is! What could possibly go wrong?" Jack replied confidently.

With a shrug, Danny and his friends followed Jack outside. As soon as they stepped outside, they were met with a glowing blue ghost hovering in midair.

"Alright, let's do this!" Jack yelled, charging at the ghost with his makeshift ghost net.

However, the ghost was too quick for Jack and quickly dodged his flimsy trap. Jack stumbled and fell flat on his face, causing everyone to burst out laughing.

"Dad, I think you need to go back to the drawing board," Danny chuckled.

Undaunted, Jack continued to try and catch the ghost with his laundry basket, but only ended up getting tangled in it instead.

"I got this! I got this!" Jack exclaimed, flailing around in his net.

Finally, the ghost had had enough and took off into the sky, leaving Jack flailing behind. As Danny and his friends doubled over with laughter, Jack continued to wave his ghost net around like a madman.

"Well, I guess it's back to the drawing board for me," Jack muttered dejectedly.

Danny and his friends couldn't help but laugh as they watched Jack stumble back into the house, still tangled up in his makeshift ghost net.

"Looks like Jack's latest experiment was a bust," Tucker quipped.

Danny could only nod in agreement as they all made their way back into the house, still chuckling at Jack's latest ghost hunting mishap.

Story 4: Write me a Danny Phantom fanfic that has Wulf in it.

Danny and his friends had just defeated Skulker and were taking a break in the Ghost Zone when they stumbled upon an unlikely ally – Wulf. Although at first Wulf was hesitant to trust Danny and his friends, he soon realized that they were not like the other humans he had encountered in the past.

Danny explained their mission to Wulf – to protect both the human and ghost world from the evil ghosts that threatened to destroy them. Wulf took an interest in their cause and decided to join them on their journey.

As they trekked through the Ghost Zone, Danny and his friends encountered ghost after ghost. With Wulf by their side, they were able to defeat them all. Wulf proved to be a valuable asset to the team, using his incredible strength and otherworldly powers to help them in battles.

But their mission would not be without its setbacks. Vlad Plasmius had caught wind of Danny’s plans and was determined to stop them at all costs. In a fierce battle, Danny and his friends faced off against Vlad and his army of ghost minions. It was a tough fight, but with Wulf’s help, they were able to pull through and finally defeat Vlad once and for all.

After the battle, Wulf expressed his gratitude towards Danny and his friends. He had never been able to trust humans before, but Danny and his group had shown him that not all humans are bad. Wulf decided to continue helping Danny and his team, offering his strength and knowledge of the Ghost Zone to aid in their future endeavors.

Together, Danny, his friends, and Wulf vowed to protect both the human and ghost world from any threats that may arise, standing tall as the ultimate ghost-fighting team.

The End

And that's the batch I missed, sorry yet again but hey, ya got 4 stories outta it lol.