#ive never done this before but i just . had an urge. I need her so bad

[memorydatas]

chat do you guys think im cooking

[axelsagewrites]

Could you do a Roy or Jamie fic where the reader gets hurt? Even something silly like getting hit in the head with a ball at practice or something! They’re super concerned and want to take care of them! I also love angst…sorry if it’s a stupid idea. No worries if you don’t want to write it 💜✨

Jamie Tartt*Practise Mishap

Pairing: Jamie x f!reader

Word count: 1291

Warnings: reader getting hit by a football (which hurts a lot btw from experience), Jamie feeling guilty, fluff

A/n: i love this idea btw ive been wanting to write something like this for a while but i made this more fluff than angst

Masterlist here

You’d never actually seen Jamie at practise. There was the occasional time where you dropped him off or picked him up after, but you never lingered since he needed to concentrate. However today Jamie in all his genius managed to forget his phone this morning.

“Wouldn’t have forgotten it if you hadn’t have distracted me love,” he teased, a smirk toying on his lips that made you smack his chest.

“Can you not?” you said, nodding to where the coaches stood only a couple feet away.

Of course, Roy heard. A loud groan came from him before he barked at Jamie, “Back on the field Tartt,”

“You staying to watch Jamie in action?” Ted asked, far more politely than Roy who was sulking at the suggestion.

You looked between him and Jamie who seemed to perk up at the idea, “Is that allowed?”

“I don’t see why not,”

“Maybe he’ll actually put some effort in,” Roy mumbled.

Jamie just rolled his eyes at Roy before giving you a quick kiss, “Get ready to see the king in action,” he said before running back on the field as you laughed.

“How do you stand him?” Roy grunted.

Truthfully you found Jamie’s cockiness annoyingly attractive, but you didn’t think Roy needed to hear that. “What can I say? I’m a saint,” you joked.

Even though the practise was interesting at first it was just boys kicking balls around a field and the illusion quickly worn off. That plus you were supposed to get a bunch of things done at home since it was a rare day off. You turned to Ted to tell him, “I’ll probably shoot off in a minute or two,” you said at the same time as someone yelled “Watch out!”

Roy tried to grab your arm, pulling you out the way, but not fast enough and a ball planted right in the middle of your chest, knocking you off your feet. You hit the ground with a thud and all the air was knocked out your lungs.

You heard Jamie shout your name, but you were too busy coughing up a storm and trying not to be sick. Roy and Ted had crouched down beside you, Beard shouting for Nate to run for the first aider. “Are you alright love?” Jamie asked, dropping to his knees beside you.

“I think- “your attempts to speak was interrupted by more coughing and the urge to be sick, “Ow,” you winced.

“What the fuck were you doing Colin?” you heard the footballers begin to argue as they all rushed to your side.

“I was trying to pass to Isaac! I didn’t know he didn’t see me,”

“When I said improve your kick, I didn’t mean kill Jamie’s bird,” Roy yelled at him, standing up.

Ted tried to calm him, but it was Jamie who spoke first, “Oi! The lot of you move it. you’re crowding her now piss off,” his anger washed off his face when he turned back to you, “C’mon love let’s get you some help,”

“I’m fine,” you winced as Jamie pulled you to your feet.

“No, you’re not now be quiet and let me help you,” he said as he helped you over to sit on a bench at the side. The first aider came and gave you a once over and said it was all good but to be careful. So, Jamie naturally made them triple check. Colin also came over, apologising a million and one times to which you assured him it was okay, and Jamie tried not to death glare him.

Some water and painkillers did help but you still weren’t feeling amazing. Ted walked over with a guilty smile on his face, “How we are doing over here folks?”

“Better now,” you smiled, hiding your wincing as best you could.

“I’m gonna kill Colin,” Jamie muttered.

You rolled your eyes, placing a hand over his, “It was an accident babe. Let’s just let it go, okay?” Jamie didn’t say anything, but you knew he wouldn’t. “But I should defiantly go now,”

“Well Rebecca gave me a call saying to tell Jamie to take the afternoon off and take care of you,” Ted said and before you could protest, he cut you off, “Its doctors orders, okay? Now scamp you too. And try take it easy, okay?”

You felt bad making Jamie miss the end of practise but right now football was the last thing on his mind. after dropping you off at his place and surrounding you with pillows and blankets Jamie went on a Tesco run for snacks.

When he got back you laughed when you saw the almost overflowing bag. “We’ve got enough to survive the winter,” you joked as he sat it down. “You’re spoiling me,”

“Never,” Jamie said with a bashful smile as he pulled out the flowers from behind his back, “Got ye these as well,”

“Aw Jamie,” you gushed, standing up to take them from him but you winced slightly as you did.

Instantly concern washed over his face as he grabbed your arm to steady you despite you not actually falling, “You alright love? I knew that women missed something. What hurts- “

“Jamie,” you interrupted him, cupping his face with your hands making him pause in his tracks, “I’m fine baby I swear. Are you?”

“Yeah, course I am,” he said, wrapping his arms around you, “I just don’t want you getting hurt and that. I just feel bad’s all,” he said, mumbling as he hugged you tighter.

You moved your head to rest on his shoulder, hugging him back, “But why?”

“You were there to see me and then you got hurt. I know how hard those balls can hit,” he said before sighing, “Its all my fault,” he mumbled making your heart break.

You pulled back only to pull him to sit on the couch next to you, placing the flowers on the coffee table, “It was an accident. It was no one’s fault,”

“It was colin’s fault,”

“It was no one’s fault,” you repeated, rolling your eyes with a small smile, “Now are you gonna sit and mope all day or are you gonna take care of me?”

Finally, a smile cracked onto his lips, “Thought it didn’t hurt anymore?”

“I lied,” you said, sinking back into the couch in a dramatic display, “I am wounded beyond belief. You’ll need to do everything I need,” you joked with a hand splayed across your head.

Jamie leaned down to press a gentle kiss to your forehead, “Don’t I always?” he smiled. “Want me to put those in some water?”

“Yes please,” you grinned as Jamie got up to sort out the flowers, but you called out before he could leave the room, “Can we have a movie night?”

“If that’s what the lady wants, that’s what the lady gets,” he grinned, “Just try not pick a total chick flick,” he added with a smirk that made you roll your eyes.

By the time he’d returned with drinks and a takeaway menu you already had 27 dresses queued up, “Oh c’mon,” Jamie protested as he dropped onto the couch beside you.

“Please, I’m injured,” you teased making him roll his eyes but finally agree. Despite his protests Jamie was more into the movie than you were and made you pinkie promise to pause it when he went to get the food when it arrived.

Four chick flicks and an unholy amount of food later you and Jamie were curled up on the couch under a pile of blankets. “Feeling better?” he murmured in your ear though you could hear from his voice he was already half asleep.

“Feeling perfect baby, thank you,”

“Anything for you,”

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[starlightazriel]

bee 8

desc: modern day bestfriends>lovers azriel au (fem reader)

warnings: lots of time jumps, rhys being rhys, arguing/angst, lying, az being unhinged in vegas (leave my bby alone he's not used to serious relationships), reader being insecure , SMUT ! (oral, az eating the booty like groceries (we been over this guys hes a freak), raw dogging, soft dom, self gratification,vibrator, squirting, spanking, cream pie), fluff, drug/alcohol addiction

A/N: IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK ME SO LONG MY LIFE IS V V MESSY AND UNHINGED ALSO THIS ISNT FULLY PROOF READ

MOOD FOR THE BEGINNING OF THIS

wc: 5.9k

other parts can be found on my masterlist under azriel

eight

"I got us a massive suite at the four seasons for our trip this weekend," Rhys is grinning while showing Cassian a photo of what he had booked for them. Azriel suppressed the urge to roll his eyes, only Rhys would drop that big of a bag on a weekend work-stay, they were supposed to be location scouting. He didn't want to be ungrateful, but him and Bee were in their honeymoon phase... Everything was just going right, everything except the fact that Rhys wanted to move him hundreds of miles away.

"This weekend?" Azriel grimaces, leaning against the reception desk in the shop. Kat had gone home already and it was just Rhys, Cass and Azriel left. "What if I don't want to uproot my entire life here and move to Vegas?" he asks then, Cass shifts uncomfortably on his feet, looking between his two best friends.

Rhys' jaw flexed and he leaned back, tilting his chin up at Azriel in that power tripping way that he did so often. Azriels jaw flexed, his hands balling up at his sides as he stared Rhys down, not shying away from his intimidating frame. He knew challenging Rhys never ended well, sometimes he just couldn't help himself.

"You do realize that you have a contract, right Azriel? A contract that you signed, a contract that includes relocation if I see fit," Rhys voice is cool and unwavering as he assesses Azriel. "Maybe, if you had been sober while reading the contract, you would have known that was included," Rhys eyes narrowed, the tension in Azriels jaw grew, his temper flaring. "And maybe if you had been sober when we were talking about this trip weeks ago, you would have remembered that we were going this weekend to scout out a few potential new spaces," Rhys tone was unwavering, Cass winced behind him, it was always his job to keep the peace, usually between the three of them it was almost always Rhys and Az butting heads.

"Fuck this, I got dinner plans to get ready for," Azriels voice was a near growl now, and he didn't even bother to say good bye to either of his closest friends before he left them in the shop with a slam of the front door, the bells rattling at the top as it slammed shut.

His annoyance and Rhys' sheer entitlement had him needing to take the edge off. Az loved Rhys, of course he did, he was basically his brother- but that didnt mean they always agreed. Azriel tried not to think about Rhys' jabs at his sobriety while he took a quick sniff from his vile before heading home.

-

With Bee, it was just easy. Azriel didn't seem to have the same issues he did in the past with other women, being faithful to her came easy. He guessed it was because he always had been loyal to her in a sense, since they were just kids.

The past weeks had been a type of bliss that Azriel had never known, a different kind of high than the one he got from his drug of choice. They were fucking constantly, waking up together every morning, going on dates whenever they had time, fuck, he had even posted her which he had never done for anyone else... It was a picture of her at the beach, grinning so brightly it made his chest feel tight because he put that smile on her face. ive been so blind, was his only explanation under the photo.

And still, he wasn't able to bring himself to tell her about Rhys' Vegas plans for the next year. Everything was too perfect right now. Granted it had only been a few weeks since their first date, but he just didn't wanna mess everything up so soon, he wanted to live in this perfect little bubble just a little longer.

"Az? You with me?" she giggles softly, her dirty martini pulled to her lips, her eyes glowing as she looked at him from under dark lashes. "I think I want to get the vodka pappardelle," she places her glass down again and points to the menu.

"Yeah, whatever you want baby, sorry," he ran his finger through his hair, leaning back into his seat, flicking his eyes back down to the menu. "Just- I know it's last minute, I'm going on a little Vegas trip this weekend with Rhys and Cass," he waited a second before looking up and studied her face, absentmindedly messing with the straw in his own drink.

"A Vegas trip?" Bees eyebrows draw together, her attention was already on him, the menu forgotten, he swallowed. "Like Las Vegas?" she asks, a little more slowly this time. "Why are you guys going out there?" the concern, the uncertainty in her eyes made Azriels gut wrench. He knew he should tell her everything now, tell her that the possibility of him living there next year was becoming less of a possibility and more of a reality. Sure, when she was done with school, she could be a nurse anywhere... But that was still a ways away.

"Boys trip," he shrugs, and it wasn't exactly a lie, it just wasn't the full truth. She looked back at him skeptically, and he knew he had to change the subject soon.

"Boys trip, huh?" she leans back, raising an eyebrow skeptically. In the past- boys trips were really only meant for single Az.

"I'll be good," Az flashes her a smile, he knew he may have used the wrong choice of wording. A year ago, a boys trip to Vegas would have meant unlimited blow, maybe even a threesome, hooking up with randoms, losing all of his money. "Gonna gamble for sure though," he sips his drink, she's still looking at him with a skeptical look as if she knew there was more to the story. Luckily for Az the server came back for the rest of their order.

"Have we made some decisions?" she asks, looking between the two of them, Az only jerked his chin toward Bee, he liked the smile it put on her face to be able to choose everything for them so they could try it together.

"Yes we are going to share the duck pizza and the vodka pappardelle, you want oysters Az?" she lifts her eyes from the menu to look back at Azriel, he smirks and glances up at the server.

"Yeah, we'll start with a dozen," he shrugs and the waitress beams, making sure she had everything correct before leaving the table. "Thank you," he adds, but his eyes are back on Bee.

"So boys trip to Vegas, kinda last minute huh?" she quirks her brow again, leaning forward, her elbows on the table, Azriel tried not to let his eyes settle for too long on her breasts as they spilled slightly out of her top. Of course he wasnt lucky enough that she'd already forgotten about it.

"Yeah, I mean, I knew about it.. Just forgot," he shrugs easily, nudging her foot under the table, her eyes are hazy but he can still see that skeptical glint in them. He didn't want to lie, or leave parts of the truth out... But he also wanted to have a good night before he had to leave in a couple days, plus, she was working the rest of the week until he was gone anyway.

"Interesting," she murmurs, rubbing her finger against the base of her glass. "Anyway, you better bring something back for me," she shrugs before taking another sip from her martini.

"I wouldn't dream of coming back without something for my girl," he licks his lips, nudging her foot gently again under the table, her cheeks warm at his words and she rolls her eyes playfully at him. Az knew he was good at distracting her, though he wasn't sure if that was really a good thing or not.

"Yeah, yeah," she laughs softly, the sound made Azriels chest swell. "Thank you so much," she smiles softly as the runner sets the oysters down on the table between them.

"Can I grab you anything else?" the boy flashes her a cheeky grin that Azriel doesn't miss, he clears his throat as if to remind him he was sitting there across from her.

"More lemons," Az says boredly but there was an edge of annoyance in his tone, making the boys head snap to him and he blushed slightly, nodding his head. He didn't need more lemons, he just wanted to be difficult, the level of jealousy he felt when anyone even spoke to her was something he'd never experienced.

"Oh, of course, I'll be right back," he swallows, before running off back to the kitchen. Azriels eyes snap back to Bee, who's looking at him with pursed lips.

"Azriel, lay off the poor kid he's like eighteen," she shakes her head slightly, he noted that her martini was almost gone now, she was definitely feeling it. He only shrugs, smirking at her, stretching his legs out under the table so they were more than in her space, the skin of her bare calf pressed against his pants, she's nibbling on her lip, her eyes growing darker with lust. He loved how easy it was for him to get her going.

"Here you are, enjoy," hes back quickly and he places the small dish of lemons in front of Azriel.

"We will," Az only nods, Bee makes sure to utter a rushed thank you to him, shooting Azriel another look. "Don't look at me like that, lemme see you swallow," he smirks suggestively and she lets out a little puff of air her jaw dropping slightly but she couldn't help but smile.

"Azriel, don't be gross," she giggled quietly but she was still squeezing lemon onto the first oyster, he watched as the juice dripped off of her fingertips and she picked up the oyster, her eyes meeting his.

"That's it," he murmured, watching her tip her head back slightly and open her lips, her cheeks warmed at the gravelly tone of his voice. "Good practice for when I make you swallow something else tonight," he smirked, sipping from his drink while he watched her rest the shell on her lower lip, he watched her throat bob as she swallowed, humming softly in approval.

"Mmm those are good ones," she giggled softly, turning the shell over and placing it back on the ice.

"Youre a good one," his lips twitched in a sheepish smirk and she held his gaze, her own full of so much love it made his heart rate pick up.

"Az Im worried about you, cheesy much? youre definitely going soft on me," she grinned so brightly it made heat crawl up the back of his neck and onto his cheeks.

His cock was aching in his pants, he couldn't wait to get her back home. His jaw flexed before he muttered "you're going to be my end I swear."

-

"I should have stopped after the first two," I giggled quietly as I stumbled into my bedroom, kicking my heels off behind me, Azriel was right behind me, I could almost feel his eyes burning into my backside.

"I told you," he says in that low husky tone he often used with me these days, it was laced with so much need it made my head spin. "Anyway, Im glad now because it will give you courage for our reenactment."

"Reenactment?" I ask, turning to look at him now my brow slightly furrowed. "Of what?" I ask curiously, taking each of my earrings off, I had obviously been wearing the ones from Az, I had every day since he had gifted them to me. I had learned that he liked to get rough often, I didnt want to chance losing them so I tucked them away carefully in my jewelry box.

"Of the day I walked in on you," his voice was so calm and commanding it made my toes curl, my breath hitched, a warm tingling sensation spreading throughout my pussy. My cheeks warmed at the thought.

"Az- I can't..." I breathed out, my heart rate picking up at the thought of just purposefully touching myself in front of him.

"I didnt ask if you could. You will," he says, his voice so sure, and he was right. Knowing what he could do to me... Anything he told me to do, Id do it. Especially when he sounded like that. "I'll give you about five minutes to get situated, ten if youre lucky but I don't think I can be that patient. Im going to show you what I wanted to do to you," he adds, a small smirk tugging at the corner of his lips. I was already moving before my brain could even process. My throat bobbed, my cheeks embarrassingly red as I retrieved the toy I had used that day from my top drawer and I left him alone in my room. It was annoying how easily he could render me speechless these days.

I slipped out of my dress and my panties, leaving them both on his bedroom floor, I didn't dare look at myself in the full length mirror he had. I let myself fall back onto his bed, inhaling his cedary scent just like I did that day he walked in on me.

My heart was racing as I spread my legs and placed my rose toy on my clit. I let out a small huff my eyes on Azriels open bedroom door as I let the toy suction softly to my pussy. My hand traveled up, caressing my skin gently before settling on my nipple, I rolled it gently between my fingertips. My breath hitched when he appeared in the door way, looking handsome as ever, my cheeks warmed at the sight of him. How had I gotten so lucky?

"That's my baby," Azriel chuckled darkly as he leaned against the door frame to his bedroom. I moaned softly when our eyes met, my cheeks turning pink. "Now if I had been bold enough that day, I would have got down on my knees like I'm about to now,"

"Az," I whimpered softly in desperation, the need for him starting to outweigh my nerves. It was hard to want to hide when he made me feel so sexy. A single look was enough to do me in.

"Shh baby," he hums softly and in one fluid motion, pulls me to the edge of the bed and slowly drops to his knees. I whimper softly as he brushes the sides of his face against my inner thighs, inhaling my scent before spreading my legs. I gasped softly my hand shaking slightly as I held my toy between my legs.

Azriel sucked gently and bit at the sensitive skin on my inner thighs, a guttural moan escaped my lips at the contrasting feeling. The sting of his little nibbles mixed with the soft buzz and suction from my toy had my back arching up. "Please Az," I gasped softly, I knew there would be little bruises peppered over my delicate skin.

"Please what baby?" he breathed out, his breath hot against my sensitive skin. My head was spinning, I didn't know if it was from the alcohol I'd drank at dinner or from the way he touched me, the way he took control, guided me. It just felt so right, so perfect.

"Please," I let a heavy breath pass through parted lips, my heart beating rapidly against my chest. "Please taste me, I need you," I begged softly, gasping as he pushed my legs up, the delicious scrape of his rough hands against my skin sending heat slithering down my spine.

"That's my good girl," he licked his lips at the sight of me, my legs spread and up in the air, bared to him except for my clit, the vibrator still buzzing around it. I was already so close, my cunt pulsating with need for him. My breath hitched when I felt his mouth on me, the slow lazy roll of his tongue on my second hole sending stars dancing in my eyes. I hummed softly, tossing my head back and letting my eyes squeeze shut, goosebumps raising all over my skin.

"F-fuck Az," I breathed out, the new sensation making my mind go numb. His thumbs pressed harder into the backs of my thighs, I arched my back slightly, gasping again for breath as he circled his tongue around and around my opening. He held my legs open as they threatened to close, quivering pathetically underneath his touch. It was only a matter of seconds before I was cumming, his name ringing out through the room, making him moan against me. My vibrator fell from my hand, gently hitting his cheek before rolling onto the floor next to him. I panted, my hips wriggling underneath him as he sucked the sensitive skin between my pussy and my ass before covering my entire cunt with his mouth. "Ohh my- fuck-" each word came out in a pathetic broken moan as he shook his head between my legs. I couldn't hold it back anymore and I was squirting all over his face, he moaned against me, pulling off of my pussy with a soft sucking sound.

He gently licked me down from my high, my body jerking with the aftershocks of my intense orgasms. "Damn baby I didnt know you could do that," his eyes are so dark and hazy with lust as he kisses back up my body, hes back on his feet now, hovering over me. "My little sprinkler," he teases before biting down softly on my nipple, I yelped softly, my body jerking.

"Az, I need you so fucking bad," I breathed out my eyes meeting with his. He grinned in that lazy way he did his face still glistening with my cum. He looked so damn happy, it made my heart sing. It had been a bit of a rare sight these last couple years... But these past few weeks? He had been nothing but happy, it made my chest swell knowing I was the cause of that happiness.

"I was gonna put my cock in your mouth first but since you've been so good we'll save it for later," he stood up straight, looking down at me hungrily, my legs laying lazily over the edge of the bed now. He undid his pants, his eyes never leaving me as he dropped them to the floor. "Lay on your stomach," he commanded, his voice gravelly. He watched me readjust myself, cursing quietly under his breath as I lay on my stomach across his bed before him.

I let out a moan when his hand unexpectedly connected with my ass with a loud slapping sound, the sting sending my toes curling. He gently lifted me up, his arm wrapping around my torso and lifting up with ease. He slid a pillow underneath to prop me up perfectly. Azriel gently rubbed his rough fingers over the tender spot he had smacked, humming in approval. "Ive wanted to do that since I watched you walk away from me in the hall that day," he admits, only earning a whimper in response from me. I was so ready for him to fuck me into nothing.

I shivered as Azriel slowly slid his fingertips over my shoulders and down my arms gently wrapping his large scarred fingers around the tips of his fingers pressing into the insides of my elbows as he pulled my arms behind my back. He used one hand to pin my wrists to my lower back, I whimpered softly, begging him for his cock again as his hand tightened on my wrists, his large hands finding no trouble.

He used his other hand to guide his cock toward my pussy, not bothering with a condom. If it was one thing about Az, we were fucking raw, every time. He slid his tip over my slick cunt, teasing gently before sinking into me, cursing softly under his breath as he did. "Yes please fuck me, please," I begged desperately, the side of my face pressed into his bed.

"That's my girl, so wet and tight for me," his fingers were gripping the bed beneath me, his mouth almost by my ear now as he moved in and out of me his cock filled me up over and over.

I moaned his name again, arching my back up for him, he hissed under his breath and spanked me again, I felt my ass jiggle under his big hand, the sting made my body jerk. "I love how you fuck me," I whimpered softly, feeling like a puddle beneath him, he still my hands pinned to my back, he let out a low groan from deep in his throat, up on his knees as he slammed his hips over and over against my ass.

I let out another broken moan, his considerable length dragging over my g spot every time he thrusted himself into me, I couldnt hold it in anymore and I came all over his cock with my third orgasm of the night, stars danced behind my eyes my body tensing underneath him. I couldnt stop the scream that left my lips as he continued fucking me, cursing again softly and squeezing my tender and red flesh from his spanks. "Ohh yesss Az..." I moaned again, his thrusts lost their rhythm as he grew closer, his breath heavy and erratic behind me.

"Mmm baby you're so fucking sexy," he breathed out before letting out a low guttural groan. "I'm gonna fill up that pretty little cunt," he grunted in my ear and with a few more thrusts I cried out softly at the feeling of his thick ropes of cum spilling into my pussy. So damn good. "Fuck," he breathed slowly pulling his hands from my wrists, my arms fell back at my sides and I whimpered softly as he slowly pulled his cock from my pussy. He swore again under his breath, "Stay just like that," he muttered, leaning over and grabbing his phone from the bedside table, and I felt him slap his still semi hard cock on my ass cheek. "For later," I could hear the grin in his voice as he snapped a picture of his gleaming cock against my ass. I just whimpered softly in response, my body feeling limp my mind numb. He tossed his phone aside on the bed and flipped me over onto my back and placed a soft kiss to my lips.

I had been waiting to get fucked like this for years. None of my past lovers had ever been able to compare to the way that Az made me feel, though if things hadn't gone the way they did with Az I probably would have ended up giving Eris another chance.

"You're so damn good at fucking," I huffed out, looking up at him with hazy satisfaction. "It's not fair," he just laughed and leaned down, pressing a soft kiss to my forehead and then my lips. I let my eyes flutter shut again as he tucked my hair behind my ear before he muttered "let's get you cleaned up baby."

-

"Send me lots of pictures," Bee flashes her biggest grin, hugging Azriel so tightly. He smiled down at her, squeezing her back and pressing a soft kiss to her forehead. He was glad she had brought them to the air port, it gave him just a little extra time with her.

"I promise baby I will, I'm gonna miss you," he rubs small circles into her back, savoring the last few minutes they had together before he was on the plane.

"Be good okay?" she drops her voice lower, Rhys and Cass were standing off to the side waiting for him while he said his last goodbyes. He could tell she didn't want them to hear this part. "Just like- stick to drinking and bud okay? Just don't want you to buy something without knowing what it is for sure first.." she mumbles softly, biting down gently on her lip.

Az sighs quietly, pulling away slightly at her words, he knew she meant well but he couldn't help but get the tiniest bit annoyed. "I'm gonna be fine, chill off me," he chuckled quietly but leaned down and pressed one more kiss to her lips, because he know she was only saying that because she cared about him... She had never exactly supported his extracurricular activities. "I'll be good, and you better be good too," he warns playfully, but there was a slight edge in his tone so she would know he did mean it. "You're mine now, I don't want to hear about any red headed visitors," he raises an eyebrow and she pursed her lips, glaring lightly at him.

"Azriel. You know I would never-"

"I know," he cuts her off, brushing a lock of her hair behind her ear. "I gotta go baby, text me when you're home safe alright? I'll text you when I land," he opens his arms one last time to crush her in good bye hug, she hums softly tucking her chin into his neck and inhaling his scent.

"I love you," she mumbles softly, he just grinned and hugged her even tighter, he kissed the top of her head, not daring to utter it back yet. Some things he just wasn't ready for.

He had told her he loved her dozens of times, but he knew the next time he said those words to her, they would carry a whole different weight.

-

It was evening on the second day when they finally made it out onto the strip, the first day had been filled with scouting out locations. Rhys had already signed a lease, much to his own surprise, he thought he'd have to come back a few times before finding the perfect spot for their new shop. The signing was followed by a very late dinner and a few bottles of champagne before they retreated back to the massive suite Rhys had got for them.

Azriel had to admit, he liked it here. He was having a blast with his brothers, and he hadn't wanted to admit it before but he could see himself living here. He knew this would be a level up for him, he would make way more money out here... Plans were already stirring in his head for how he would convince Bee to move out here with him, she would have to transfer schools, quit her job... He knew that was a lot to ask. He couldn't imagine not living with her anymore...

"Sin city baby!!! AZ! Get outta your head man do you see this shit?" Cass had been excited since the moment they stepped off the plane yesterday, they were all quite fucked up now. They had been gambling all night, winning and losing money and had now settled in one of the nicest clubs Azriel had ever been in. There was half naked bottle girls everywhere, and of course Rhys had got them a VIP section with bottle service included.

"Oh I see it," Azriel laughs softly, catching the eyes of the bottle girl who was leaning very close to him as she poured shots for the three of them. She was definitely giving him the eyes. Azriel had to look away then, turning his head back toward Cass. "I'm just fucked up," against Bees wishes, the first thing he had done this morning was purchase a gram.

"Better hope that shit didn't have fenty in it," Rhys turns his head to look at Az, who rolls his eyes in response.

"It's doesn't," he snaps back, before downing another shot, he didn't even know how many he'd had at this point. "It's just good shit you want a line?" he raises his eyebrows, there had been a time the three of them did this all together. Az just never grew out of it...

"I'll take one man, I'm in fucking Vegas!" Cass shouts, earning a laugh from Az who simply passed the little white bag over. This was one thing about Vegas he liked, the freedom of just being able to do a line in the club and no one even batted a single eye because it was Vegas, and obviously one of them had money if they had a VIP here.

"Some day the two of you will grow up," Rhys sighs before beckoning the bottle girl over for the list of bottles they could purchase.

"Get the Clase Rhys we are celebrating!" Cass voice boomed out and he shot to his feet, shaking his head with the effect the drugs had on him. Azriel just laughed and snatched his little bag back from him.

"Easy," Az laughs again, catching the bottle girls eye again, he didn't mean to, she was fucking staring. She flashed him a seductive little grin before retreating to get the bottle that Rhys had ordered.

He knew a few months ago he would have flirted a little and ended up taking her back to the room. He wasn't single anymore though, and the pain it would cause Bee just for him to get his nut off for a night while he was on his boys trip, it just wasn't worth it. Plus, he needed her to know he wasn't that guy anymore. He wanted to be everything for her.

-

"No fucking way," my phone tightened in my hand as I stared down at it, Kat and I were out to brunch, she figured we should have a little girls weekend while the boys were away. So finally we were able to do something since I had Sunday off, Az wouldn't be landing back home until late tonight.

"What is it?" Kat asks, lifting her eyes from her plate.

"Go look at fucking Cassian's instagram," I said through gritted teeth as I swiped through each photo from their apparent escapades lastnight.

There was my Az, my Az... Grinning wickedly, leaning over, face smushed between the tits of two bottle girls who were wearing nothing but lingerie to cover their most intimate bits. He had his arms around each of them, a drink nearly spilling over one of their shoulders. His pupils were blown out, clearly he hadn't listened to me about staying away from drugs out there. My heart was sinking further with the scroll of each photo. There was another snap shot of him dancing with one of them, she was bent over, her ass shaking on him, one of his hands loosely on her waist.

"Oh fuuuck.." Kat drew out the word, her eyes widening as she looked down at the photos on her phone.

"Yeah fuck is right," I locked my phone, tossing it on the table next to me before downing the rest of my mimosa. "I fucking knew it, he hasn't changed even a little bit- As soon as he said boys trip I-"

"Boys trip?" she asked, drawing her eyebrows together. "That's what he told you?" she asks, biting her lip and gnawing on it a bit. What the fuck did she know?

"Kat...?" I say slowly, meeting her eyes, her cheeks are flushed as if she had just said something she knew she shouldn't have.

"I- I'm sure Az is going to tell you- I don't think it's my place to-"

"Just spit it out," I was starting to get more angry, the gnawing feeling of shame starting to eat at my stomach. "What do you know?!" I demanded and she loosed a breath, leaning back in her seat.

"Bee- I swear I thought he told you- Please don't tell him it was me that said anything I'm sure he's just waiting for-"

"Just spit it out Kat," I repeat, an impatient edge to my tone. What had he kept from me?

"It was a location scouting trip- For-for the new shop that Rhys is opening up with Az and Cass in Vegas," her voice is soft now, and she's almost wincing as she waits for my reaction.

Just like that... It felt like everything had been some sick game to pass the time. My stomach turned, I felt like I was going to lose everything I had eaten on our little brunch date.

"I'm so fucking stupid," I breathed softly, fighting back the tears that threatened to spill from my eyes. I really thought I knew him better than that... I never expected him to pull some shit like this. To keep something this big from me.

-

Azriel groaned loudly as he rolled over, the silky sheets slipping from his skin as he reached for his phone. He smiled, noticing the few notifications he had from Bee, his face quickly fell, and he was sitting up straight in an instant rubbing his eyes.

good morning!! can't wait to see you tonight

Normal, but the message below that one, and the notification that she stopped sharing her location? Definitely not normal. They had been sharing location for years, basically since it had become an option.

going to visit my family for a couple days i'll talk to you when i get back.

He quickly typed out a response.

everything okay baby?

He knew he had forgotten to face time her lastnight before he went to bed, but he was so fucked up he couldn't even remember getting home. And it had to have been almost 5 am when they had gotten back to the resort. She had asked him before they left to face time her before he went to sleep both nights, surely she couldn't be that mad over that, could she?

As he padded into the little kitchen that was built into the suite, his eyes were glued to his phone. He opened instagram next, and his stomach twisted slightly when he pressed her story and it was one of those dumb quotes girls tended to post after getting dumped about never really being able to know someone.

Fuck what did I do? his face had gone a little pale, the contents of the michelin star dinner they had lastnight and all the alcohol he had consumed bubbled in his stomach, he was racking his brain, trying to piece together the night, he couldn't really remember much of anything once they had left the casino and got to the club.

All he had to do was scroll down to the top post on his feed and his face paled. "Cass are you fucking dumb?" he's in Cassians part of the suite before he can even think shaking him awake.

"What the fuck man?" Cass groans, rolling over and rubbing the sleep from his eyes. Rhys was behind them now, he had been up for an hour or two already.

"You saw the instagram post didn't you?" Rhys chuckles from behind him, holding his coffee cup in hand, leaning against the door frame.

"You think this shits funny?" He demands, whirling around to direct his attention to Rhys. As angry as he was at Cass, he knew it was only his fault that he had bought coke and got completely black out shit faced drunk. "Man fuck both of you," he growls and turns on his heel, storming to the bathroom and slamming the door behind him.

-

a/n: sorry but if it's one thing abt me yk i love drama

taglist: @smalljasper289 @cynthiesjmxazrielslover @scorpioriesling @userxs-blog @lilah-asteria @abadfantasybook @judeduartewannbe @lindsayscottagebythesea @velarisdusk @serxndipity-ipity-blog @julesvanslutta

[yoru-no-seiiki]

https://www.tumblr.com/yoru-no-seiiki/751614308271718400/hii-so-like-ive-been-starving-for-yandere-eren

def something w/ canon eren! but other than that you can could go as wild as u want! :p

god where do i start?? i’ll mostly write for early seasons eren since i refuse to watch the whole thing until i’m done with season one on my quotev book as a motivator but i’ll add some tidbits that i got from other fanfics. go check it (my book) out btw!! it’s called Walk With Me!! (currently on the next chapter which is around 10k words atm huhu)

as always he’s aged up to 18 during enlistment and massive spoilers for those that don’t know the lore/story yet.

MDNI. DDDNE!!

yandere! eren is a force of absolute willpower. he is obsessive, he is protective, and very much goddamn possessive. he needs you, he needs you to need him too if not moreso. he grew up in a very traditional household and expected to be the provider in the family. the least you could do is have him in your thoughts at all times.

if you want max yandere! potential with him, it’s best to have known him even before armin. be close family friends. maybe your parents worked with his dad since marley and were similarly banished (but not turned into mindless titans).

as children he’d always been protective of you. he’d always stick to you like glue. and because of future him’s influence over grisha and essentially your parents, you were arranged to even sleep in the same bed.

but this sort of backfired in the long run cause you saw him as this annoying brother figure that just wouldn’t stop bothering you.

and one day you just blurt out, tired of the suffocation you felt with your friend, with your parents that vehemently kept pushing you two together, of everything in your life that you couldn’t control.

“i wonder what it’s like beyond the walls.”

i feel like armin would still be the true trigger of eren’s obsession with the outside and freedom (after all, he doesn’t give a shit about yours so why and how would you influence him in that area?), but you probably pushed him in terms of the survey corps.

you were dumb at the time. i mean as a kid, who isn’t? so you announced to literally everyone you knew that you planned to join the military and eventually explore the outside world.

you didn’t really understand the concept of death and all but whatever that was, you still thought it would be better than eren’s basically isolating you from anything that moves.

you dont truly understand death until eren kills those intruders in mikasa’s house right in front of you.

you were supposed to help him, but only stood there frozen in fear.

thankfully mikasa awakened just in time, with eren shouting at her to save you.

speaking of mikasa, her true allegiance/ackerman blood thingy is still with eren in this fic but i headcannon that since his first command was to for her to fight for you she also has the same knee jerk reaction for whenever she perceives you’re being harmed.

in anycase, that day ™️ happens and you all start training.

it had already been obvious since you were teens but eren started looking at you from a different angle. the sexual kind.

your lack of contact with other people due to his influence had made you a bit of a pushover, as such he’d often coerce you into sex or other related acts.

i mean, you had to pity him! he never had the opportunity to explore and act on his urges. mans stayed a virgin til he enlisted and he’s pent up. you try to argue that it’s cause he was so hung up on revenge that he’s bitchless but that only leads to him questioning you if you’ve been seeing other people behind his back.

i mean you two were basically together, why would he see other people? don’t tell him that you’ve been … cheating on him? how could you!

so yeah he does the same thing to mikasa (the manipulation not the sex lol) and forces her to guard the two of you during your ‘trysts’ (which is just him, the inexperienced boy rutting into you and getting off while you stood/laid there uncomfortable silence)in addition to basically shutting down whatever feelings she might have brewing for him (poor mikasa dude)

but surprisingly eren is the most lax to you during this time period. despite the literal r*pe, he basically allowed you to roam around and do whatever for a change. frankly, it was mostly cause he had to catch up in terms of training, but also cause his FREEDOM ideal is the strongest during this phase.

anddd depending on your behavior you might get pimped out. only to those that he can trust though. god even jean got a taste of you because he lost a bet. he promptly beats up the man afterwards though.

if you’re more focused on training and acquiesce to his demands (hormones) however you’ll be enjoying the only three years of your life where eren’s presence wasn’t looming like dread of your death by a titan’s hands.

now i can’t vouch for how accurate i can portray later seasons eren but basically he’s the worst in yan levels at that point.

once he can fully utilize his powers there is literally no escape for you, not even his death, unless you have some sort of power that hides your ass. he’d already prepared for everything from your captivity to how your life will be like after his inevitable demise.

like i said before, he’d be the type to give you an illusion of freedom. he hates the idea of being caged and vice versa. so specifically speaking after his death and the end of the series, you’ll go from being stuck in a remote area to being free but with hundreds of armed guards watching your every move. hell maybe even the whole “town/village/city” you live in will all just be paid actors he had staged. he will never let you move on from him. whether you like it or not, you’re his in life, in death, as he is dying, and beyond that.

[bonefries]

Franco must have mad dick and head game to have pulled a baddie like Lizzy

this is the funniest ask ive gotten yet ty anon.

know nobody wants to hear my franco nsfw headcanons but i want to have faith the mans head game is strong because of all tht sucking he does. i pray the man has picked up tips over his life.

but, one of the main reasons Eli wants to keep him around is because she wants to eat him!

wip // and story undercut below tw for cannibalism/death/violence

So to explain this i need to give some back story.

Eli's mother killed her father before she was even born. Her mother was so in love with her father, but he wasnt as commited or faithful. Mom doesn't take that well, kills him because if she can't have him nobody will. She dismembered him, cooked him and used every part of him for mundane and simple things around the house. And from this point forward she would go on to do this multiple times to other people. Her mother was unfortunately not in the greatest mindset and also gravitated towards people that treated her poorly.

Eli would have to help skin human flesh and widdle bone/cut hair and make materials. Nothing was wasted. Not even meat. But her mother would only serve her specific pieces. Over the course of her childhood into her teenager years Eli would grow more and more curious to know what the heart of someone she loved tasted like. But she never felt the right kind of "love" to go through with it. This is a hidden obsession that Eli has. There is a bizarre hunger in her she never really can seem to satisfy. This obsession evolves into the idea that eating the heart of the person she acquires this love with, will cure the hunger.

SO, Franco becomes her chosen for this obsessive belief/ritualistic meal to calm the hunger. Not because the love she feels is one like her mother had for her father, its more of a sad love. Eli knows Franco wants to do fucked up shit, has done fucked up shit, and it attracts her to him in some strange empathetic way. She never discusses this urge amongst friends or people she wants the company of. And essentially my motifs between her and franco are that he is thirst and she is hunger. They both want to do something really fucked upto the other, we will just have to wait and see who does it first. She does tell Franco this way down the line, but here is how she would say it:

"Aw Frankie. If I had it my way, dolly. I'd reach right into that lil'barrel chest'a yours, rip ya'fuckin heart outta ya. And bite it like a fuckin fruit....while it was still warm and pumpin........A girl can dream."

-Elizabeta

[nyxronomicon]

Part iv: One More Time

ex-husband!Geto x fem!reader

reader: she/her pronouns, wears a skirt/dress, tits & vagina pet names: my love note: I use MC in the place of y/n because I prefer it cw: coercion & dub-con (reader is drunk), manipulation, choso sleeping in the room you're getting freaky in, religious themes, yandere!Geto, fake boyfriend scenario, penetration, creampie, fingering, overstim

masterlist | ao3 mirror

Despite your better judgment, you gave in to him. Just like you always did. Your buzz was fading, so you downed the half glass of wine you'd forgotten on the table.

Suguru took the hint and sensually kissed your neck again, sliding his hands down your thighs to find the hem of your skirt. He was still painfully slow, taking his time feeling you again as your hips rocked against his.

"Suguru…" you whispered as he kissed you, his lips covering every inch of your exposed skin yet still respectful of the dress you were wearing. "I jus'..." You had a slight slur to your speech. He recognized this as the level of drunk where you get honest.

"This is bad for me. You're bad for me…" you continued as he peppered kisses down your cleavage. "It doesn't mean anything , ok 'Guru?"

Suguru was stunned at how much this felt like it used to. Like you never left him to begin with. He was sure you felt the same way, why else would you tell him how little it meant to you if not to try to convince yourself?

"Of course not, my love." He whispered back, staying focused on making you feel good. He pushed the spaghetti straps of your dress over your shoulders, exposing more of your breasts that he promptly kissed.

"No… not your love…" you mumbled. He shifted on the couch again, making the couch squeak. You froze in place, glazing over at Choso who was still snoring away on the bed. You were at the point where you no longer wanted him to wake up and stop this. The damage was done.

You put no more thought into your fake boyfriend after feeling Suguru's thick cock pressed against your sex. Nothing but a few layers of fabric separated you, and the urge to feel him inside you again was raging in your core.

Suguru hadn't skipped a beat, feeling the heat of your skin and your uneven breaths told him everything he needed to continue. "You missed me too. I can tell."

"No…" You sighed with pleasure, refuting his claim more out of habit than anything.

"No? Then what are you feeling?" He whispered. His voice was tender and affectionate. He didn't want to force you into anything. That was part of the reason you'd divorced him to begin with.

"Feeling…" you closed your eyes, pushing all distractions aside for a moment.

Suguru was everything when you closed your eyes. His hands had pushed the hem of your skirt all the way up your thighs, holding your hips still against his, making sure his cock was nestled against your sex through the layers of fabric. Feeling his size against you so tightly made you yearn for him, remembering how easily he could get you to fall apart in a way no other man had.

Your dress had fallen off your breasts entirely, and Suguru's wandering kisses took its place keeping you warm. Your head tilted back as you felt his tongue against your nipple, a light moan dripping from your lips by accident when his tongue swirled around the hard nub.

You could feel the heat in your core quickly rising, his touch so familiar and intimate. He knew everything about you, your body, your mind. He even knew how much you missed him before you did, which made it all the more dangerous to admit the truth. And yet, your mind wasn’t quite clear enough to stop yourself. You were lost in the nostalgia, stuck in his little trap that he’d designed to bring you back. To make you his again.

"You're right…" your words were breathy, you weren't really even processing them as you spoke. Never mind the alcohol, his presence was intoxicating. Every moment you spent with him left you wanting more.

"I'm right?" His movements stopped but your body yearned for him to continue. "I want to hear you say it." You pouted, looking into his molten brown eyes again. You couldn't resist him at this point even if you wanted to.

"I missed you." You whispered, cautiously pressing your lips to his, knowing those words were a mistake. Far more than any actions you’d taken until now.

He immediately kissed you back, more reckless now that you weren’t holding yourself back. But there was something needy behind it, like those were the words he’d been waiting to hear all this time. You pulled away, looking into his eyes with a soft gaze.

You were in it now. Even if you stopped yourself, Suguru knew he’d won this round. You were so pent up and needy, his touch sparking your desire so deliberately.

He flashed a flirty grin as you rocked your hips against him, inspiring him to trail his fingers up your thigh to your sex. He felt your folds through your panties, slowly stroking his thumb over the fabric as he looked back at you with those lonely eyes.

Choso’s presence returned to your mind, knowing the longer you kept this up, the more likely he was to wake up and see how wrong the plan had gone. Yet, you couldn’t ignore the way Suguru looked at you. It was like he was begging for just a little more, and the way your pussy fluttered at his touch had you subconsciously rocking your hips against him again.

It was subtle at first. The friction as you rubbed against his bulge felt good. Suguru was an expert at building you up slowly, making sure your arousal has piqued before making you cum. His fingers kept rubbing your pussy, gradually intensifying his movements. He started kissing your neck again, sucking and biting you as you finally embraced the pleasure his touch was bringing you.

Your brain was getting muddied. The rigid walls and barriers you’d built against him had been torn down one by one, and Suguru Geto had gotten exactly what he wanted. You. And you were letting him get away with it.

Suguru pushed your panties to the side and pushed his fingers down your slit, feeling how wet you were. "That’s my girl…" He mumbled into your ear, biting your earlobe as he stroked your folds. Your breathing was labored as he continued, his touch getting a little rougher when he found your clit.

"My love," Suguru raised his hips, his bulge prodding you again. You wanted his cock so badly it was embarrassing. He continued to whisper in your ear, "I would do anything for another chance. Please."

"Guru…" you mumbled back, barely able to control your volume. The pet name made his heart leap, knowing it was always reserved for intimate moments like this.

"I know." He stopped your thoughts, talking you through them as he fingered your clit more intentionally. Your back arched in pleasure as he continued to whisper. "You’re not sober now. But I know you feel it too. We belong together."

"I've put you through so much." He started sucking your neck again between thoughts, the feel of his teeth against your soft skin making you shudder. "Even I know that… but I would do anything for you… if you would just…"

You were panting, his fingers and mouth pushing you to the edge as he whispered. You could feel pleasure washing through you, the familiar rush of ecstasy coming closer and closer as he continued.

"Let me worship you." Suguru's hips rolled against yours, responding to how desperate you seemed. How close he knew you were.

"Yes… Guru…" your voice was a whimper, your whole body electrified as you twitched in pleasure.

"Good girl." He sounded husky in your ear as your orgasm hit, squirting all over his hand and pants as your body tensed up. He kept rubbing you through your high, savoring each aftershock as you trembled against his fingers.

Slowly, you relaxed against him. You were too tired to fight your desire to return to his side, too drunk to let go, or maybe just too stupid to care. It didn't matter. You rested your head on his chest, anyway. It felt like home.

"Is my love tired?" Suguru whispered. Your mind blasted alarms at the pet name, but you were too exhausted to fight it anymore. Or perhaps you wanted this too.

"Guru…" you nuzzled closer to him. This feeling was so familiar but so distant at the same time. "… we're divorced…" It almost seemed like you were talking to yourself.

Suguru stroked your hair, holding you against his chest. "Just let me pretend we're not for this weekend."

You were silent. Your sensitive pussy still ached as it rubbed against his stiff bulge. His body was so warm, his scent so decadent. His presence was so soothing, you hated how calm and at peace you felt in his arms.

"And then what?" Your voice was soft, unsure.

"Do you want me to promise to leave you alone?" Suguru sighed. "You know I can't do that. I've been trying for a year to get over you and I can't. I still think about you every day. I yearn for your touch, your kiss… I spend every moment thinking about you."

"Suguru… it has taken me all this time to piece my self esteem back together. I still haven't repaired most of the friendships I lost because of you." You felt hypocritical clinging to him like this as you spoke, but you were too comfortable to move.

"What about our friendship? Could we rebuild that?" As he spoke, you squeezed your eyes shut.

You lifted your head to look at him, and he looked back at you with glossy eyes. He placed his hand on your cheek, making eye contact with you. "I need you." He sounded so vulnerable.

Suguru was wearing down your resolve bit by bit. Without thinking, you pressed a kiss to his lips again, the passion between you still burning just like the first time. You could still feel his clothed cock pressing against your sex. You were conflicted, wanting more of him but not wanting to cross the boundaries you'd made to protect yourself.

Although, you'd crossed many of those boundaries already.

"One more time." He whispered in your ear. You felt his bulge twitch, knowing what he was asking for. "Just for tonight. Let me fuck you one last time."

Your mind was still a little scrambled from the wine, and your body was still sensitive from cumming earlier. He held your hips, slowly pushing himself against you to remind you of his size. You gasped silently, glancing at Choso, who was still sound asleep.

Suguru placed a hand on your cheek, directing your attention back to him. He kissed you deeply; he was done asking for your permission. He quietly flipped you on your back, hovering over you on the couch.

"It doesn't have to mean anything." He kissed your neck. "... just need you one more time, promise." You were panting, his hands finding where you were sensitive. You knew you should say no, but he felt so good. Truth be told, you often still thought about the way he fucked you.

"One more time." You repeated, giving him the permission he wasn't going to ask again for.

He kissed your neck with more passion as you heard the clinking of his belt, soon feeling his bare cock mingling between your thighs. You sighed as he directed the tip into your folds, taking his time to swipe it between them and get it wet.

With a breathy moan, he finally began slowly pushing himself in, his patience dwindling now that your warmth wrapped around him. You both were trying to be silent as he bottomed out, but only a sleeping man wouldn't hear the panting and soft groans coming from the two of you.

"Fuck…" Suguru whispered, burying his head in the crook of your neck. "This feels… better than I remember…" he started pumping in and out of you, the friction instantly dialing up the heat in your core.

You were oversensitive from earlier, your pussy fluttering around him as he prodded your g spot. You forgot how good the sex was with him. It was like his cock was made for you, filling you perfectly and hitting you just right. Just a few minutes of his thrusting and you felt your rational thought disappear, your body doing all the thinking now.

"Feels so good… my love…" Suguru was absolutely shameless, knowing at this point you were too fucked out to care what pet names he used. He was intentionally sewing them back into your mind, reminding you how good it feels to be his love. If only he could get you to say it back.

Suguru's long dry spell and the languid make-out session had him on the edge already, his cock throbbing with pleasure as he haphazardly rammed into you. He wanted to cum so badly already, your tight grip around him. "Can I... my love?"

"Can you...?" You whispered back, heavy breaths tickling his neck.

"C-cum inside..." he sounded so needy. Desperate. Like he was about to fall apart regardless of your answer. You knew you should say no. The single last salvation for the evening- making him pull out like a one-night stand. But you knew he was clean. He admitted he hadn't fucked since the divorce. You were on birth control, so that wasn't a concern either.

It was the intimacy that concerned you. Well, it should have. Your walls had crumbled and Suguru was in your heart again. The throbbing of his cock made your whole body shudder, and you hated to admit it. You hated to admit that you'd cum again if he filled your aching hole with his seed. You hated that in the heat of the moment, the breathy moan that fell from your lips, just before an almost silent "Yes."

"Mmh," He grunted, his body tense as he slammed into you a few more times. Whimpers seeped into his erratic breaths and you suddenly felt his cum shoot against your cervix. It triggered your sensitive cunt to tighten around him, the pleasure of another orgasm rushing through you as he rode out his high, riding yours with it.

As the two of you stilled, both attempting to catch your breath, you glanced over at Choso. He remained blissfully asleep, none the wiser about the sinful deed you'd just done. Suguru remained nestled deeply inside you, peppering kisses on your neck.

"That was... incredible, my love." He whispered in your ear.

"Guru..." you sighed, body buzzing with the fading ecstasy. As your post-nut clarity kicked in, you realized you never really stopped loving him, either. The one-night stands, the dates. It was all a distraction. There was nothing substantial behind it. And if Suguru really had changed (he hadn't), maybe you were being too cruel by not giving him another chance (you weren't).

But it was late, and you were drunk. Even though every cell in your body ached to be intwined with him for the rest of eternity, you knew Suguru Geto. You knew what he would do if you gave him that power over you again. But still, after asking him to leave, you found yourself seriously considering taking him back. Just according to Suguru's plan. 

[space-apples]

ive done it again folks! made angst about when i laughed the hardest.

(@hopepetal )

“I’m cursed, Zera, you can’t—”

“I can.” Zera’s eyes turned purple, and Space never thought he’d be scared of them until this very moment. It was for a split second; Space’s fear dissipated as soon as it came, but it was long enough for Zera to notice.

Zera always saw everything, after all.

“I thought you said you’d do anything to survive,” he said, taking a small breath to calm themself down. Their tone was bitter, but Space didn’t care.

“I would, but why would I—” He lowered his voice, as if They wouldn’t be able to hear this conversation. They would. They always would. He mirrored Zera with his own sharp words. “Why would I want you to put yourself in danger, Zera? I— Honestly, I’m fucking fine with being red, and, you know, I’m feeling way less dizzy now.”

“You think you can lie to me, Space? Of all people— I literallycan see. Everything. It’s sickening.”

“I erm… hope you feel better soon.”

“Space.”

“What—? it was getting too serious for me,” he scratched the back of his head sheepishly. “Last session I couldn’t crack one joke cause my head was too busy cracking itself open—”

“Space.”

“Zera.”

“It’s getting serious because I need you to take this seriously.”

“I am. I- I do,” he murmured, bringing themselves to talk how they would normally; loud, with a tint of fear, light enough to go unnoticed by almost everyone. “You know that just because they’re heartless monsters doesn’t mean you are.”

“…I know.”

“Do you?” At Zera’s silence, he switched gears, trying his best to keep them as safe as possible, even though he knew it was a lost cause. “I really, really, don’t want you to do this for me. They’re going to be angry, and— it doesn’t go well when they’re angry. For you and for me.”

They didn’t respond once again. Instead, they closed their eyes, and Space knew what was coming. Zera was too stubborn to back off, anyway.

He felt the life coming back with the warmth that started sprouting in his chest. It felt like a breath of fresh air, like he’d been stuck underwater and finally got pushed to the surface.

Red Life symptoms can consist of homicidal ideation, urges, and actions towards oneself and others. Is often sadistic and reckless. Their self preservation all depends on the individual, but most of the time, it becomes much smaller. Affiliations with such people is a cautionary tale at best.

Space wasn’t red anymore, thanks to Zera, but he couldn’t bring himself up to look at the admin.

“Thank you, Watcher Zera.” Xiara. “Say hi to Jay for me.”

He didn’t hear a response, nor did he notice the full body flinch of his friend. Space finally turned around, only to find that he was now alone in the caves.

-

“Open the door, open the door, open the door now.” Space’s breath was shaky, his body racked with terror. He was so close to death, and there was a husk right behind him, there was a husk right behind him, there was a husk right behind him.

The bottom cobblestone block broke, and he ran inside, crashing into the rest of the sillies confused and concerned faces.

“Want some enrichment?” Elle said, offering some in the form of bamboo. Her eyes sparkled concern, but she didn’t say anything. She didn’t have to.

Space took the bamboo, smiling softly before hearing the groans of desert zombies and the rattling bones of skeletons.

“The husks, they’re— they—“ Space took a breath. “—killed me before.”

“It’s true,” Wilm whispered, as if they all didn’t see the death message on their comn. “I was there.”

Space was given cooked rabbit, he didn’t know from who (Brandy had slaughtered so many rabbits, it was probably them), but now they all were out of food.

Unfortunately Elle’s enrichment bamboo could not keep them fed.

This was stupid. Space was stupid. It was just a husk, he’ll be fine to just kill some stupid rabbits. It was fine. There was no reason to be scared of anything.

A husk appeared out of nowhere. He screamed, agony filling his chest the same way Zera had given him life before. The cruel irony of yet again being killed by the same undead creature, but this time he didn’t have the excuse of a migraine, was sick.

Zera had given Space a gift. But as everyone should know, throwing something into the void was wasteful. Space wasn’t just space, he was Empty Space, quite similar to the void. Cursed to forever take, cursed to forever lose.

Space knew that to the Watcher’s above that it was entertaining, and he could hear their laughter echoing in his ears.

[lorei-writes]

Winter Flower

Chapter IV: White Gold & Soup

Masamune x OC [Hana] Summary: Hana wakes up in the gardens of Azuchi castle without any recollection of her past. Who is she? What was she doing there? And most importantly – what is she supposed to do now? Placed under supervision of Lord Date, Hana has to find her footing in the unfamiliar reality of the warring states. Series Masterlist

Content Warnings: hunger

The last few drops spill out the corners of my lips. They regroup into a narrow stream, before flowing down my chin, and then further, to finally rest within the fibres of the kimono I’ve been given. I blink. No, no, this is wrong, this is so wrong.

“I can’t believe you’ve skipped three meals since yesterday,” Masamune grumbles, his back turned towards me as he bustles about the kitchen. I do suppose he is my supervisor, or perhaps a host, but it still does not feel exactly appropriate to be served by a lord.

“I –”

“You do know you can’t live on an empty stomach, don’t you?” The lecture continues. I’m not listening anymore. I’ve given up what feels like half an hour ago.

Masamune appears well-acquainted with the space, so much so that he does not need for his sight to guide the movement of his arms, his body seemingly instinctively knowing where just about anything may lie. Pots, utensils, even ingredients, nothing escapes him or his knife. I gulp – if he is at least a hundredth as skilled with his sword… I should consider myself lucky to still have my head attached.

I raise my hands in front of myself, to signal my defeat. Nevertheless, he goes on and on, about the importance of proper nutrition, the (less and more probable) consequences of poor eating, appropriate cooking techniques, and approximately million other things that fly right over my head as soon as they leave his lips. From the moment he started the rice, Masamune has not been quiet for longer than a minute, and now I truly do understand why Kojuro left us alone. Me too, Kojuro. Me too. Had I known Masamune felt so passionate about all things related to feeding, I’d never – never – dare to offend him… Although I do wonder whether it is the empty space in my stomach that upset him so, or whether it has merely been the straw that broke the camel’s back.

The quiet plink of dishes being set down brings me out of my thoughts. Masamune stares at me expectantly, several bowls waiting in front of me – some with rice, soup, vegetables… My mouth waters. Oddly enough, it is only now that I am made aware of my own hunger. My fingers tremble as I reach for the chopsticks, all while I pray for my will to hold up for long enough. No, silly me, no, we cannot eat with our hands… I’ve said no, me. Here, here, chopsticks. Yes…

There is this feeling again; my body does not seem to be fully mine. Whatever happens around, it’s all merely a haze, a distant echo from far away lands. I’ve relinquished control over myself the moment I touched the first bowl of rice.

There is nothing past it.

I need more of it.

It is not enough.

More. More. More…

I…!

My jaw hurts from how low I’ve had it fall, and I only wish I could open it further. A quiet inner voice whispers to me, urges me to have it drop out of the joint, assures that for as long as I can force food down my throat, I will be fine – but it is absolutely detrimental I do so fast…. And perhaps I would have, had I not lost myself in rice. I hardly bite; something deep down has me convinced it would be an utter waste of time. Given the ease with which it comes to me, I do suppose I’ve done so many times by now.

My body downs the soup, bowl after bowl. There will always be time for breathing later, I am certain of that much even when I grow mildly light-headed. It’s so hot it burns.

The last few drops spill out the corners of my lips. They regroup into a narrow stream, before flowing down my chin, and then further, to finally rest within the fibres of the kimono I’ve been given. I blink. No, no, this is wrong, this is so wrong. No — I —

Somebody puts their hands over mine, just gently enough for me not to jolt back. They stay in place to lull my anxieties, and have me release the bowl the very next breath. I reach after it, but I freeze on the spot, Masamune staring at me wide-eyed. My arms drop down. For the love of all things holy, what exactly have I done?

“I-I –” I stutter. My cheeks seem wet, so I bring my hand to them to inspect it further… And I do find the root of this state. I lower my head as to hide my face, embarrassed and thus convinced it must be awfully red – if not due to tears, then as a result of my newly regained awareness.

A plink of dishes, again. I look up, only to be assaulted by a strangely sentient piece of cloth… Or at the very least it looks like so, for it cuts off my vision as it wipes my face dry.

“Eat some more. You must have been famished,” Masamune says. He drops the cloth – and I can only nod, this time not possessed by the promises of white gold in front of me.

He doesn’t say a word until I’ve had my fill.

“Whenever you’re hungry, come here and eat.”

I don’t dare look at him, but he has none of that. Masamune grabs my chin and forces me to face him properly… so I shut my eyes. He clicks his tongue.

“Damn it, lass. You’ve wolfed down several days worth of food in one sitting, the time to be embarrassed has passed.”

I do not yield.

“Hana.”

Please, stop making this situation any harder on me. At this point, inaction will have me become even more ridiculous than doing just about anything.

“What is it that you wanted to tell me?” I speak as blankly as I possibly can. Masamune drops my chin, and I turn my face away before opening my eyes.

“Do you know how to cook? How to start a fire?”

I get up. I can almost feel his gaze drilling into my back as he watches me walk away. I hear his steps to my left, slightly behind me. He is ready to intercept my escape route, but I do not have any intention to run.

“There is only one way to find out, is there not?”

Masamune nods. Somehow, I don’t want him to watch, although I do suppose it is inevitable for as long as fire is involved.

***

I have not been ready for what followed. Out of all the things we had done, rousing the flames was the only one that came to me with relative ease… As for the rest, I can imagine having them return to me at night in form of nightmares. To put it simply, the answers to his questions are: both yes and no; yes. Yes, I can cook something edible, but also no, because our definitions of the word vary… tremendously. (Although I am also of the opinion that he shouldn’t have set his expectations high to begin with. The fact that, apparently, I can crack an egg with one hand speaks everything to my dexterity, and precisely nothing to my overall ability to cook).

My wrist still hurts from whipping egg whites into a foam; I am nearly certain chopsticks were not destined to perform this task. Masamune has given up on me what feels like several hours ago, and has resigned to have me fulfil his orders rather than do anything on my own. Gladly, lord Chef. I swear I won’t ever feel hunger again. Kitchen, kitchen is a war zone, even as he takes over and pours the batter into an appropriately sized tin.

The sun has already set, although I fear that may be an understatement to an extent. The room is kept from darkness by a single lantern, and I can barely believe Masamune has considered it reasonable to have us go on for this long. What is worse, he still seems to have enough energy to look over pans and pots, while I nearly topple to the floor, my feet aching – at this point, the ground feels bed-like soft. The… treat, castella… it’d better be worth it… It’d better be… My eyes feel dry, so I suppose I ought to let them rest. Soft like bed, indeed, yes…

I am startled awake, for the second time this day… Unless it is already tomorrow, in which case, I have woken up absurdly early for a change of pace.

“Wake up, lass. It’s ready.” Masamune shakes my arm. Heavens, why… Nevertheless, I prop myself on my elbow, stiff from the cold of the floor. What little light has remained alive softens his smile, then content and bright. For somebody so displeased with my tastes, Masamune appears fairly proud now, his eye crinkling as he plops down beside me. I accept the plate he pushes into my hands, although it takes me a moment to realise what it is that sits over it.

“Dig in,” Masamune urges. He doesn’t wait for me, so I hurry to blink my disorientation away.

It is a cake, similar to a sponge, but with a slightly crunchy layer on the bottom. It almost feels familiar, but something about it is different to what I must have known during the life I had before I forgot… Both its sweetness and texture fill my chest with warmth. I take another small bite, relishing it for as long as I can.

“Now, this is how you should eat.”

I snap my head to the side, startled by his voice. It has slipped my mind that I am not alone. As he is now, Masamune seems rather boy-ish, not much different from a smugly satisfied cat. His elbow resting over his knee, he props his chin in his hand – and have mercy on me, it dawns on me how ridiculous we are. I stifle a laugh, half-convinced I would wake up the dead if I allowed it to come out unrestrained.

“What’s so funny?” Masamune frowns.

“You’re the lord of that,” I pause and gesture vaguely. I actually do not know what exactly he is the lord of, but I assume the title is not granted to just about anybody, “and I’m your prisoner. And we’re sitting on the kitchen floor, in the middle of the night, eating cake. Better tell me, what isn’t funny about this?”

His shoulders shake as he snickers, “You’re making it sound as if there was something wrong about me using the kitchen in my own manor.”

“I wouldn’t dare imply that, my lord,” my words melt into a satisfied hum. I cannot stop the corners of my lips from curling upwards, each bite bringing forth the feeling of a secure embrace. If my body remembers… Then I’m glad it remembered the sensation well. I close my eyes to savour it further.

“You’re having a good expression now.”

My head turns towards Masamune again. I look at him, confusion replacing whatever it was that he has seen.

“It’s better when you smile than when you cry,” he explains, as if that was the most obvious fact of the world. I shake my head and smile once more. Lord Eyepatch, don’t tell you were worried there? First the tiger, then the sword, and now the cake, it’s too much for a single day without any proper rest. I refuse to see the nap on the floor here as anything but a mistake.

“Thank you, lord Masamune.” I sit up properly and set my now empty plate down. “For the food. And the cake.”

He raises his arm by a bit, the hem of his sleeve sliding down before getting caught on the bandage.

“Favour for a favour,” he simply states. Masamune rolls his shoulder before getting up to his feet. He extends his hands towards me. I hesitate – I can hardly see his face… But then I do, I do accept it.

Masamune puts out the lantern.

“Besides,” he adds. He seems completely motionless, not a rustle of fabric or creak of the floor making it to my ears. “I don’t want to see hunger under my roof.”

My throat has suddenly dried, synchronously with the return of the sound. Masamune slides the door open, but somehow, my body tells me not to follow him, not even by a step.

“Come on. It’s dark. Or do you know the way?”

It is, and that is what has me concerned. But you do have a point, lord Chef, I do not know which direction to take from here… So even though I should know better than to let you lead, I do what my body warns me against.

There is this voice, the one that woke up when I first ate. It tells me now that I shouldn’t have even looked at you, that I’ll regret it in time… But then again, it was hardly my mistake. No?

--

Series tag list: @cheese-ception @nuttytani

[muzanswifey]

Can I nsfw request headcannons of Dragon!Kagaya x Reader please? It’s fine if you ignore it!

Dragon!Kagaya x Fem!Reader

18+

Oooo this will be interesting 🤔 ive never done anything nsfw for kagaya before so lets give it a try

Warnings: Smut, dragon au, kagaya is still blind, handjobs, blowjobs, riding, cowgirl, knotting, creampie, thank-you sex

Unlike most dragons, he’s quite accustomed to human ways and is thoroughly educated on the differences of the two species

But that isn't to say he doesn't feel the same instincts and urges as all other dragons do

So when you wander into his cave one quiet night, the first thing he can even think of doing is keeping you there

He does everything he can to extend your stay, feeding you, letting you take a nice warm bath in one of the many hot springs that decorate his abode, warning you of the many dangers that lurk around at night, yet you still insist you must get going, not wanting to be a bother

But he continues to urge you, practically begging you not to leave, and he's just been so nice that you give in

You stay for a grand total of 3 weeks, your every attempt at leaving met with a sad expression and worry from him, but you push past the sadness it brings you, finally leaving the way you came

It gets darker a lot faster than you thought it would, suspicious sounds filling your ears at every turn, when you reach a dead end of stone, absolutely certain this wasn't her last time, you start to worry

Several dragons corner you in, snarling and snapping at you dangerous close and you scream out

Just when they're about to grab you, 2 more individuals sweep in, swiping at your tormenters and shooing them away

As everything settles down, they come better into view, two large males, one hellishly large and blank eyes, the other a bit shorter with crazy white hair and scars, your confused as you stare at them until another comes out from the foliage, who you quickly recognize to be Kagaya

He softly asks if you are alright and you can't stop yourself from leaping into his arms, so overwhelmed and traumatized by what had just happened

Your still sobbing as he takes you back to his cave, his rumbling purrs deep within his chest and tender cooing eventually calming you down

As he cradles you in his arms as he lays you both down into his nest, your overcome with a sense of intimacy you've never quite felt before, it runs all the way from you tingling brain down to your curling toes, a wave of slickness rushing out of your core

He must be able to sense it as he nuzzles into you, bathing you in his scent while mumbling sweet praises into your ear

You giggle as you fall deeper into him, unable to stop yourself from lazily humping at his lap, hazy stupidity glazing over your brain quickly with the growing vibrations of his purr

You're the first to undress yourself, letting his hands roam about to memorize your body with touch rather than sight, then you push his robe open, taking his thickening cock in your hand and pumping it slowly, he groans aloud, leaning into your neck to bite and lick carvings into your neck

You drop down to take his member into your mouth, bobbing up and down to suck him until he finally reaches full hardness and twitches harshly

You ride him gently, rocking your hips to and fro and unintentionally stimulating his growing knot with your puffy cunt lips, he pants underneath you, worshipping your perfection and encouraging you to take what you need from him

When the time comes, he warns you, prompting you to slap your hips down a top his and swallowing his knot into your tight heat

He practically whimpers, humping up into you and jostling where you're locked, the movement has you whining, throwing you into your own orgasm and further milking him into your womb

You lay a top him exhausting, both of you peacefully falling asleep with his cock and cum stuck inside of you and his voice lulling you to unconsciousness with sweet nothings

[justwritedreams]

Rebel Renegade | Kai

mafia Kai x soldier reader

Word count: 4007 Genre: action, drama Author: maari Warnings: reader and kai try to kill each other, mentions of bad guys, guns, knive and fight, suggestive. Note: I wish I had focused on the action but with Kai it's practically impossible. It's way suggestive and shorter than I planned so sorry? Request: Hello ive never done req thingy before so bare with me here i go lmao 😭 can I request (if you can) write kai fic similar to sechan but make it soldier reader and criminal kai something abt him being an rogue soldier who works for the enemny of sort you can go crazy with it if you want thank you! 💛

Y/N felt her heart beating fast between her ribs as she walked quickly to the intelligence meeting room.

Hearing that the commander requested her presence at the super secret and important meeting didn't help.

She controlled the urge to rethink all the things that could have been considered wrong and focused on just placing her fingerprint on the entrance, waiting for the automatic door to open and reveal that the table was full of soldiers with ranks higher than her.

That made her swallow hard but move on, saluting and seeing her division commander nod and point to the empty chair to his left, she sat down after the others did.

“Y/N, you will go on a field mission outside the base.” he warned, causing her to stare at him in surprise.

"Sir." her tone was questioning but at the same time accepting.

It wasn't like she could say no.

“You will work undercover.” he explained and pointed to the projector ahead, she looked away and watched the slides. “We need to take down a mafia that has been secretly selling weapons to a separatist terrorist group.” pictures of the terrorists were shown and she memorized the faces that appeared. “The main mafia leader is called Kim Jongin, better known as Kai.”

Y/N had to control the sigh when the next photo was shown.

Not because the photo was of a military man, but because the man was attractive, even in a photo like this.

No soldier she knew had the feat of looking like a Vogue model in the official army photo.

"He's a deserter." another superior spoke and Y/N looked at him quickly, by the look of the man she knew he knew Kim. "Extremely skilled and deadly, knows all our best men."

Y/N looked back at the photo, this time as if she could unravel the man through the projector.

Defector meant traitor. Which made him dangerous.

“And why was I chosen, sir?” she looked at everyone at the table and waited for an answer, which came from her own commander.

“You're not known, Kim won't know who you are, let alone know your weaknesses. That's the most important."

Y/N held her gaze and felt a huge weight on her back.

She got the message. If given the chance, Jongin wouldn't hesitate to kill her like he probably did others.

But as the commander had said, he didn't know her. He didn't know how stubborn she was and if the mission had been entrusted to her, then it would be accomplished.

[...]

It took six months for Y/N to prepare for today.

She studied the case in depth, read everything she could about Jongin, and met people who could give more details about him. All she heard from people was "Jongin is dangerous, he's not the merciful type".

She clung to the old army file as if it were her new manual.

Kim was a member of the elite Marine Corps team, which meant he had extraordinary training, he was not only good with weapons but also melee combat as well as being a great tactician. He had nothing he couldn't do.

Decorated by the general himself, Kim left the army a few years later without a plausible reason, at least that was what was missing from the file.

This made Y/N go straight to the sources, but contrary to what she imagined, not even those who knew Kim talked about it. It felt like it was forbidden and she realized that something very serious had happened.

This was fragile and unexplored territory.

As for Kim himself, she watched him closely. Infiltrating a group of his clients, who agreed to cooperate before being sent to life in prison, she had inside information.

Where was he and with whom, where would he go next. She could tell it had become her new obsession.

However, none of this made her feel more relaxed about the mission.

Of course, she was glad to finally act off base, she was trusted by her superiors to do so. It was the opportunity she had longed for for so long.

Right, she was anxious at the idea of ​​meeting him in person. He was the bad guy but it wasn't like she could ignore the fact that he looked like the personification of Adonis.

She was a soldier but not blind.

Y/N caught her breath on the way to the Aphrodite nightclub, Kim owned it and used it to go about his business without looking suspicious, it was like it was her first mission again. Heart racing, adrenaline taking over the veins and dry mouth.

She would pose as the new negotiator, was accompanied by security and the group's driver, no one but the owner knew she was undercover and would remain so until she gathered enough evidence to put Kim in jail as well as his associates.

Unlike the uniform she was so fond of, she wore a short red strapless dress and black sandals, the makeup marked her face well and had become her best friend in the last few months.

All to make it different from what she really was.

As soon as they entered, after security had authorized it, she felt the hot air and the smell of expensive liquor as lively music filled her ears. The nightclub was well decorated, in a chic style and exactly the way she'd heard.

It didn't take long for Kim to appear, striding through the entire club with a smug smile on his lips but that changed when he saw Y/N.

She almost laughed at his brow rising almost imperceptibly as if asking if she was the one he was waiting for, she just didn't because she felt a shiver run through her body at the sight of him staring at her so deeply.

“Mrs. Kang?” he asked softly and she took a deep breath, his voice was velvety and it had an effect elsewhere on her body.

"Miss." she corrected and held out her hand to him, who stared for seconds before taking it.

Y/N thought she was going to be able to shake and pull him towards her, in a sign that she was the one in control, but when she felt the warm and soft palm between hers, she realized that this would be much more difficult than she imagined.

Was contact with him supposed to burn like that? As if he was lighting a fire that had never awakened inside her?

"Please follow me." he spoke after clearing his throat and pointed in the direction.

Y/N nodded and walked beside him, sensing the security guards following. Kim walked up the floor and stopped in front of the dark door, turning to Y/N.

"If you don't mind, I don't like company." he nodded at the security and she agreed, turning her head just enough for the two of them to understand that they would be alone in the room.

Just imagining it, Y/N's stomach churned nonstop in sheer anxiety. She entered just as he made room for her to do so and heard the door slam loudly behind her, she swallowed hard before turning to face him.

A shiver ran through Y/N's entire body, Kim was a predator, eyes locked on her like she was prey. Strong as the tide.

"Forgive me, I didn't expect Yoongi's wife to be so beautiful." he spoke and headed for the large chair behind the office desk.

Y/N smiled widely as she followed him with her gaze.

"I'm not the wife, Mr Kim, I'm the niece." she didn't know how many times she had said it but that was how the story would have to go.

Y/N is the niece of Kang Yoongi, the buyer of Kim's weapons and also the leader of a separatist group in the north of the country. She was getting into the business so she could lead later, learning before anything happened to her uncle.

Anything, in case she arrested him after the deal was done.

Her body shouldn't have reacted to Kim's contented smile after listening to her.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, miss." spoke before sitting down, she did the same feeling her legs wobbly with the way he curled the word pleasure on his tongue.

Someone must have warned her that Kim was a complete sin.

“Why did you enter this world, if I may ask.” he seemed too interested.

But Y/N wanted to return the same question if she could.

“My uncle explained the situation, right?” he nodded in agreement. "The siege is closing, Mr Kim, I believe he will not be here to complete his purpose."

Even though lying and that theater being part of the mission, Y/N hated having to repeat that speech.

There was no point in being a terrorist in favor of bombing civilians and rebelling with something that only they believe is right.

"It's a shame but I can't deny that it will be much easier to have to deal with you." he smiled again and she raised her eyebrows. He didn't even disguise his flirtations. “Don't tell your uncle but he has a very… explosive temper. And please call me Jongin.”

She smirked and nodded as she felt Kim's eyes burn from so much fire, it was then that she realized that this mission was completely uncertain.

The main problem here was whether Kim would trap her in his darkest desires before she took him to jail.

[...]

The next hour was productive, Y/N got important information about the cargo and how the delivery would go. It would be the opportunity for Kim and all of Kang's cronies to be arrested.

Jongin continued to flirt with her blatantly and his intense gazes every time she glared at him were warming her body in a dangerous and good way. If he was mortal as a soldier, even fighting his ex-team, they should have warned her how much he was…well, hot.

Of so many guys Y/N knew, and she knew many since she lived in the army, none had the same effect as Jongin. He was like a black hole, pulling you with a supernatural force and you fell eternally in search of the end, which never came.

And maybe, she was enjoying this situation more than she should have.

She was undercover, it was part of the plan to gain Jongin's trust so it wouldn't hurt, right?

She could drink whiskey and go dancing at his club, all to make him trust her.

So when Jongin invited her to enjoy the club for the rest of the night, she didn't refuse.

“You’re excused, Mr Kim will take me home later.” she spoke to security who looked reluctant. She knew the order was that they didn't leave her side for even a second, but Jongin needed to see that she was willing to trust him to let the same feeling go through him. “I said you’re dismissed.” she repeated in a more serious tone and they nodded, walking away as quickly as possible.

"That was pretty sexy." she felt Jongin approach from behind and speak close to her ear, making her smile evilly.

"You didn’t see anything." she turned her face away and her nose brushed against his warm cheek.

It was a simple touch but it only heightened the sexual tension between them, all the more so because Jongin fixed his eyes on her mouth.

Wanting him to taste his own venom, Y/N made her way back downstairs as she looked behind her to make sure he followed her, and she wasn't wrong.

He led her to the bar with one hand resting on her waist, causing Y/N's entire body to shiver at the contact.

Okay, he wasn't even being discreet.

"What will you want?" he asked and she laughed in disbelief.

Discredited because she was there with him, admiring the beauty of the club's colorful lights being reflected in his perfect face.

“Whiskey. Double." she asked and saw that Jongin looked at her in surprise but smiled in response.

He ordered drinks and they sat at the bar to talk, this time anything other than business, he didn't take his hands off her waist and Y/N confessed that she had enjoyed that approach. She could smell his expensive perfume and the heat of his body up close.

They took the opportunity to dance, keep talking and drinking until the club was practically empty. Jongin wasn't subtle, he showed he wanted Y/N, it was clear when he almost kissed her in the center of the dance floor but Y/N was smart and walked away before that could happen.

A part of her didn't accept it, wanted her to give herself over to Jongin's full, pink lips that were extremely inviting. But she wanted to tease him, push him to the extreme until she finally had what she wanted.

She didn't know what time it was, she was sitting on one of the bar stools and had Jongin's suit between her shoulders waiting for him to come back from the office with the car keys, now with her body relaxed she felt tired. Acting like an undercover was tiring and only there, acting like her role had she noticed.

A wave of sadness washed over Y/N, if circumstances were different, Jongin would be the perfect man. The perfect match for her.

She liked intense men, who showed what they wanted not just with words but with actions. She had enjoyed that warm and sensual atmosphere that surrounded Jongin, she might even have fallen in love with him if he wasn't the bad guy.

As soon as she saw him approaching, she was left wondering what actually had done or happened to make him turn to the dark side. This was a question that had been with her for a long time, ever since the mission had been entrusted to her, but she didn't think so much about it when she saw that he didn't seem to have any remorse for funding terrorist groups. But after meeting him in person, hearing his almost childlike, husky laugh, seeing the kindness in his eyes, she wanted to understand what had happened.

It must have been something very serious because she knew he was a loyal man.

"Let's go?" he asked and she nodded, still dizzily thinking about the possibilities.

Jongin kept his hand at the base of her spine as they walked to the parking lot, she clung to the suit as the icy wind hit her body, that short dress was useless in keeping her warm.

So she was grateful when Jongin turned on the air in the car as soon as they got in, he smiled before starting the car and pulling out of the parking lot.

“Can I take you to my house?” he asked in a very subtle tone, the kind he hadn't done that night and Y/N nodded, feeling her palms sweat.

Well, he'd made it clear that he wanted to spend the night with her and Y/N needed to go on with the undercover role, right?

Along the way, Jongin placed his hand on Y/N's exposed thigh and stroked it so slowly that it made her feel a shiver through her spine until they stopped in front of the mansion.

She couldn't deny that she was anxious. It had been so long since she'd been with a man that she looked like an innocent teenager again, but she could tell that in a way it was something new because she'd never been with anyone like him.

Jongin helped her out of the car, being gentlemanly enough to open the door, and Y/N noticed that he purposely leaned their bodies together, smiling provocatively.

He let her in first and she quickly scanned the house, it was just the way that she had thought, she took off his suit and left it on the sofa, no longer feeling cold.

“How do you want to do it?” he asked as soon as he closed the door and she turned to look at him without understanding, until she realized he was pointing a gun. "Soldier."

Y/N felt all the blood in her body go cold, his gaze as sharp as a knife.

Shit. Holy crap.

It couldn't be.

"What did you say?" she forced her voice to come out steady as she held her breath.

Jongin was steady, his eyes were now shrewd and there was no denying it, he knew everything.

"Soldier." he practically spat out the word. "I'm not going to lie, the undercover agents are starting to get good at this." he moved the hand that carried the gun and the blood on Y/N's face fled, she felt her mouth go dry and her heart pound.

She chose the best answer, silence. She wouldn't give in until she had a chance to escape and she had.

“You were the closest, very good work, I have to admit. But your eyes don't lie.”

She clenched her jaw and took a good look at him, the posture, the way he held the gun with one hand and how she could get out of there after she'd knocked him out.

"I don’t know what you're talking about." she answered through gritted teeth and he laughed.

“I once had that look. Of hope, of certainty that you are doing the right thing.” Jongin's expression turned to pain. “Until I realized it wasn’t quite like that.”

“Until realized you were a traitor.” Y/N spoke angrily and saw that he cocked his head to the side, offended.

"You don't know me."

It was her turn to smile.

"You're right, and you don't know me either." she spoke and lifted her leg to kick the gun away, the movement caught Jongin off guard and he dropped the gun on impact.

Jongin took a step and attacked her, arms tight and outstretched, he almost landed a punch but she deftly dodged it but he didn't stop.

He kept taking steps forward, forcing Y/N to walk backwards as she blocked the attacks, now she was grateful that she had studied Jongin's fighting profile beforehand. He was fast and steady but Y/N had the advantage of being smaller than he, which made it easier to duck when fists came her way.

But that was tiring her too fast, so she decided to attack instead of just defending herself, she took a random vase and threw it towards him that he defended with his arm, the glass shattered on the floor as he let out an angry grunt.

Y/N took out the knife hidden in the holster on her thigh and was close to hitting it when Jongin grabbed her wrist, forcing it to stay in place, she ended up hitting her back on the table already in the other room and Jongin tried to force the knife to hit her neck, just inches from her skin.

She ignored the fact that his body was glued to hers, this wasn’t the time to be excited by the closeness when he was trying to kill her.

Y/N used all the strength she had to keep this from happening and when she saw that he was going to use all his body weight, she dodged it and the switchblade got stuck between the table. With no choice, she decided to use a low blow, literally.

She kicked Jongin's private parts, causing him to groan in pain and fall to the floor. She leaned against the table, practically sitting on top of it, and caught her lost breath as she watched him squirm.

“Is that the best you can do?” he asked, struggling to get the words out.

"I'm not the one crying." she teased and saw him get to his feet, still staggering.

He took a deep breath and looked at her, they both remained that way, just exchanging glances.

"Whatever your plan, believe me, it won't work."

Y/N laughed sarcastically.

"Anytime I want, you'll end up in jail." she raised an eyebrow and saw Jongin looking her up and down.

She noticed when his gaze strayed between her legs and it was only then that she noticed that her legs were open, totally out of the way she should feel, her cheeks burned and she closed them instantly.

She stood still as Jongin approached slowly, hands still on his private parts, she reached for the knife on the table and Jongin's hand did the same, holding her where she was, stopping her.

He positioned himself between her legs, making her hug him with her thighs, Y/N felt a shiver when he took his hand from the place where she had hit it and placed it on her thigh.

The soft, warm palm held her there, and she just pulled her torso back to face him.

"If you weren't so attractive, I might kill you." he spoke softly, causing her heart to continue beating at a frantic pace, as if they hadn't stopped fighting.

In fact, the fight was still going on. Against their own desires.

"It's not what it looked like, you're rusty Kim." she spoke, seeing him raise his eyebrow. "But I don't think it's just in that department." she lowered her gaze to the place where she'd hit.

“You shouldn't have said that.” he warned.

Y/N didn't even have time to blink, Jongin brought the hand that was holding hers to the back of her waist while the one on her thigh went to the back of her neck, bringing her angrily up until their lips met quickly and thirsty.

She sighed as she felt the contact with his full lips as Jongin growled as if he were an animal, as he took her lips to himself with gusto.

The kiss was hot and uneven, there was so much desire there that they both didn't know what to do first, taste the whiskey or let their tongues meet. Jongin forced his torso forward so that Y/N lay on the table, he let go of her hand so that he could hold her by the waist tightly while she brought her hands up to his face, her thighs squeezed his hips even more and she felt something grow beyond the urge to surrender.

The adrenaline she felt when they were fighting turned to heat and the small dress she wore seemed to suffocate her, and she couldn't control the surprise or the moan that escaped when Jongin's lips left hers and went to her neck. She brought her hands up to his shoulder and squeezed hard as she felt his teeth drag along her skin.

She had barely caught her breath from the kiss and was already out of breath, having to squint her eyes even tighter as her breath hit her skin.

Another groan escaped her as she felt Jongin's fingers leave her waist and go to the end of her dress, suddenly it was as if her entire body was pure lava and the world was swirling around.

She didn't feel Jongin's lips anymore so she decided to open her eyes and found him looking so deep into her eyes, it was as if he was corrupting her soul.

“Jongin…” was the only thing that came out of her lips, his name.

"You can call me Kai." he lifted the fabric until it was bunched around her waist and his fingers played with the cloth that still covered her.

He smiled and pulled away enough to place a kiss on her inner thigh, Y/N bit her lip and a shiver went through her entire body, taking a certain heat to the place where Kai was so close she could feel his breath heavy of it.

"If you have the strength for it."

[askuemki]

The books (or well manga) wasn't bad at all, I just don't exactly like reading all that much One of the series my buddy gave me to read was called "Run Away With Me, Girl" and it was such a lovely story Basically there's this engaged woman who runs away w/ her former girlfriend, 10/10 recommend I never really had a twilight phase, but I did (still do) enjoy the concept of werewolves and vampires Nothing wrong w/ liking the book/movies!! I can see the appeal There was this one other book I read some time ago by Stephany Meyers (same author as Twilight), the Host I remember not getting the story, but I ended up enjoying it Wondering why you would want to watch a movie in English over Spanish? Is it something about the language or performance you'd wanna experience? Or does it seem less bothersome to process things Yeah, Alexa is like Siri... My mother just uses it when everyone is out of the house and has something playing, just so there could be an allusion that someone is there or as a timer Think my dad uses it to try and find answers to questions, but most of the time it fucks up and tells him smth else Personally I don't have an urge to talk out loud, Id perfer just picking up my phone to check the time/weather, but when I do try and ask Alexa things it just doesn't answer and I have to yell at it (even though it was advertised as being able to hear you if you talk normally..) Lokey bad logo design, mann honestly disappointed Games on PC is really nice, can't deny that My personal problem is that I can't keep up with games, or i can't access or buy them There was this one game called Facade (with the c having a squiggle under it) where it's basically a couple bickering and stuff, while you, the guest just stand there awkwardly or trying to intervene Seen a few gameplays and it's really funny at times Me too!! Axolotls are adorable <3 In minecraft you don't really have any objecives Personally I had (or well have, but it's been awhile since ive opened it up) really fun spawning in animals and making a whole empire of cats or dogs Or just building stuff, thinking i can get a big project done when im just sitting there instead, having fun flying through the building(s) You kinda just build stuff, survive, or even go on servers/download mods for uniquer minigames and experiences (I do recomend trying to play w/ friends or other people, it can kinda get boring being alone from time to time) Besides basic controls, there isn't much that's needed to be learned? (that's important anyways) Unless you wanna specifically improve in something like building Really? I don't remember lol I have a close pal of mine obsessed w/ jellyfish (maybe just drawing them or both in general too) The whole performance of the song was really pretty!! Think ive seen that instrument somewhere before, but I can't remember where I'd love to see it paired up w/ other instruments but the others might drown out its sound :(

@vivgst new thread <3 (I have the cut so it won't be a pain to scroll lol)

I've never watched Death Note, but I guess Ill just say L is my favorite since we share a name (technically) Honestly? my answer is simple w/ what animal Id be Almost ANY cat (not the flatfaced or folded ear ones though they can have some bad health issues :( ) Like if you're a domestic cat, you have the stuff to survive both in the wild, or in someone's house. You have super scenes of smell, night vision, claws, sharp teeth, AND probably enough smarts to not get eaten by dogs or smth. On the other hand with humans, at least 70% of the population would adore you, and maybe even take you in to pamper you. It would be very easy to get them to do your bidding since you'd be just some animal, and perhaps put above your caretaker's needs. Pets? Affection? Just act all adorable and stuff and they'll give it to you, cling on to them and they'll say they're your human now. On the other hand (or paw) there's the wild cats!! Still very cute. Still very cool. Now your defenses are upped by a ton, and people still find you cute. Though with how shitty environmental conditions are, and with the bigger cats slowly going to extinction :( , I may or may not just stick to domestic cats But hypothetically.. It would be neat to be either a snow leopard, tiger, or a jaguar. I love snow leopards for their big fluffy tails, and it would be cool to be able to roam through snow and stuff, but that seems to get a little boring from time to time. Love tigers for their stripes, I don't think they can roar..?? But that doesn't change anything. Think Tigers and Jaguars are both pretty efficient in survival, but I'd pick Jaguar just for their athletics and HUGE bite force (least from my 1st search). Or maybe, maybe not because there's an outfit/skin or two of Valeria's that are based on jaguars.. (or leopards, but ill go w/ jaguars) im obsessed w/ this woman man hdwhadwjadawnk OH ALSO ON THE TOPIC OF BIRDS??? AS FUN AS IT WOULD BE TO BE A MALE BIRD AND SHAKE YOUR COLORFUL BUM AROUND, THERE WAS A WHOLE ASS WAR W/ EMUS AND AUSTRALIA Honestly who wouldn't wanna be a relative of a dinosaur, but smaller and just as fucking scary Also for vacation.... I don't like going on vacation. I just like being in my sad little room, on the internet or drawing my ass off But, Id love to visit Japan and see their Ghibli Studio museum, it's so cool... Or even just go to a few hotels or smth here and there, I love their stellar technology, I love how everything is so cute or neat there, oh and I especially LOVE the social rules there, I'm a goody-two-shoes at heart and perfectly agree with being "nice"... Like yeah sure I may not like you or the opposite, but at least we can co-exist without biting our heads off (unlike the fucking us) and japan seems open to their culture being explored by others, so I'd totally love to (respectfully) participate in some traditions here and there OR I could visit Europe. Like not even a specific country? Just Europe. Cuz the US is like really fucking big, and a country like France is apparently as big as Texas. And it would be cool to take a week trip just exploring cultures and stuff (well everything except food, I'm a terrible picky eater ugh) Vacation in the US scares me tho, I'm fine where I'm at rn Maybe id be a little open to going to canada.. but bc of how they're treating the Palestine genoside rn maybe like later in life if they redeem themselves, but like the us? Fuck them too I think crocodiles r cute, but I wouldn't wanna go near one :3 Most of my relatives are either in the Philippines or Maryland, I barely know abt them now Never thought I'd be the one to be the gay cousin, ngl

[spikesbimbo]

Drunk in Love

Summary:  Getting drunk and confessing your love for your “boy” friend and fucking him was most definitely not what you expected to go down on the usual night.

Pairing: Issei Matusukawa x Reader

Tags: Timeskip!Tattoed Mattsun, softdom!issei Hurt/comfort, friends to lovers, smut, fluff, virgin!reader, Unptrotected sex, non-penetrative sex, fingering, oral, pussy/thigh job, clit slapping, sweet dirty talk, praise, drunk sex

Word count: 7.2k

A/N: I heard pussy job and I wrote a whole ass novel

18+ Minors DNI

You run your finger over the condensation of your empty drink, drawing shapes (or what you thought to be shapes, you couldn’t tell at this point) waiting for your dear friend, Makki to bring you a refill of your cocktail.  

“Here ya go.” Makki said as he returned with your beloved Malibu Sunset. The smooth coconut rum bringing you back to your first and favorite drink that you ever got drunk on in high school. You smiling at the memory

“Thanks.” you say. Your reply being mumbled by the liquid already in your mouth.

This all started with Iwaizumi calling Mattsun up, you and Makki hearing “You wanna get wasted?” on the other side of the phone. And with pleasure, you two were already packing your stuff up, shoving yalls “pregame” bottles back in the bag. The three of you made your happy way there climbing through the fence of the abandoned skate park you were in. Needles to say it was abandoned for a reason, but what’s life without a little danger.

You three and the rest of the third years have been friends since high school, meeting in freshman year, and now including Oikawa’s girlfriend. You actually didn’t like Oikawa at first, his “pretty boy” demeanor making you internally cringe. But his personality grew quickly on you, being the perfect target to tease you and Iwa clowning him over everything.

Now back to you on your nth drink, complaining about your previous job that fired you because u got injured, even though you know you wouldn’t have lasted long there anyways because you weren’t that academically inclined. Bright? Whatever you wanted to call it.

And as-usual it wasn’t long before your crybaby ass immediately called Makki and Issei and “tried” your best to tell them what happed with your dramatic self-induced tears running down you race, while Makki urged to you to try to calm down and Issei straight up laughing at the state your were in, snot running out of your nose. You recoiling at the thought, hoping they forgot. (Spoiler, they didn’t)

But now you nanny for a rich couple and you get payed good to play with cute babies all day, sounds good to you! Luckily, you had the week off due to them going on a vacation, you think it was France, no, the south of France. Must be nice.

Cue to now, Mattsun chuckling and leaning on you and Iwaizumi; both of you, especially Iwa, being visibly done with his shit. Him reminding you about the times you bought him some random shit, which you went out of your way for since he always payed for you, like that chopper keychain because you said it reminder you of him.

He didn’t know what compelled you to say his 6’2, tattooed built self looked like a tiny reindeer but okay. It still meant a lot to him, hooking it onto his motorcycle keys. But you knew he appreciated it, despite his appearance he’s a softie.

“You wanna try this’” He says gaining his composure offering you one of the shots he got.

You took one of the mini glasses, not being the type to back down and promptly swung the drink to the back of your mouth, quickly coughing before it even reached your throat.

“This shit is fucking gross.” You coughed out bringing the glass down from your lips.

  “Imagine being sober. Can’t relate.” He said taking another shot.

  “I guess I should do that but ive passed the point of giving a fuck” You said sending yall into a giggling fit while somehow Makki was thrown in to support yall from falling over. You two carry on laughing ignoring everyone’s stares at you thinking about how much yall fit perfectly together.  

   Makki rearranges himself to sit back in his chair, far away, from the both of you, whispering “Damn. I’m really third wheeling.” under his breath. Getting a snicker out of Oikawa sitting next to him.

   “When your best friends are ignoring you. Sad times.” He continues bringing his bottle to his mouth getting no response.

  Issei chuckles and gets up shoving his hands in his pocket reaching for the cigarettes. Pulling them out while failing to find his lighter

  “Fuck.” He muttered

  “Any’all got a light?”

  No one responds so you sacrifice yourself “Yeah” you say reaching into your pocket grabbing out your prized possession of a hot pink, bedazzled lighter that you did yourself, reaching out to hand it to him.

  “Don’t lose it” you stated seriously trying not to break a smile.

  “K’ sweet cheeks.” He said smirking into the butt between his lips as he walked away. Your face now burning up, hoping that everyone would think it was because of the alcohol.

  You mind wanders, thinking about the “dates” you two go on, from watching shows you “forcing” him to watch some romantic anime, to going to the skatepark, to playing video games with the rest of the 3rd years (which you don’t really like but you’ll play for him) and him surprising you with takeout, you bringing out candles trying your best to make it cute with him telling u everything you everything about his day.

  And you always tried to remain calm, even though sometimes he deserved to get his ass beat, like that one time he broke one of your favorite pair of heels. It honestly hurt him even more, he wanted you to get mad at him but no, you just acted like nothing happened. Making the guilt rise in him. Let’s just say didn’t have to lift a finger for the next few weeks.

You basically babied him, taking care of all his “chores”, mainly making him food when you were at his place knowing he hated doing it. Makki teasing you for acting like his housewife, leading to you slapping the shit outta him while trying to cover your now red cheeks.

You’ve never been so grateful for your attire at the moment, blessing yourself for not wearing your usual outfits of short skirts and cute tops, defending yourself saying what housewife dresses in beat up vans and baggy clothes. You definitely not imaging yourself in that position for the rest of the day.

 You expressed that you just liked to take care of people, which was true. You always looked out for them, bringing an extra umbrella, to bringing cookies you made at 2 in the morning to school, always carrying band-aids (yes, the paw patrol ones you took from the kids you babysit).

You checked the time on your phone seeing it was late since the sun at last went down, your lock screen being your dogs to their complaint since they have a group photos of you all from high school as theirs. To which you replied “They’re my babies” getting a groan and huff out of them.

  Seeing the notifications of your group chat you grinned at the contact name you and Issei gave each other; yall jokingly call each other pet names, his contact being honeybun and yours being pumpkin, even including Makki in your contacts as pudding bc then it wasn’t weird, right? no.

  “What’re you smiling at y/n?” Oikawa cheekily asks teasing you. You turn to him giving him a dirty look, not having enough energy to deal him right now.

  “Don’t listen to his bullshit.” Oikawa’s girlfriend says. You’re thankful for her. She was always on your side, being the only other girl in your friend group. To be honest you just wanted her and you to hang out most of the time, but of course to your disapproval her boyfriend and his friends had to join in.

  “Fuck this. Fuck you. I’m sleeping.” You say getting up to her objection, the only thing on your mind wanting to retire for the night.

  “You sure you’ll be fine? Let us at least walk you home.” She said already grabbing her boyfriend’s arm.

  “Nah, im good. I live right down the road.” You try to say not slurring. The last thing you want is him teasing you even more, especially in this state, knowing you, you’d probably start crying at the slightest irritation when youre this drunk.

    You started to “walk” towards your house resting  your hand against the brick walls to not lose your balance, leading you to run into Issei. You stopped to watch him lean against the alley holding a cigarette between his index and middle finger.

  “I’m hiding like a bitch” He says noticing you, resting his weight against the wall.

 “Wanna be a bitch with me? He grinned  blowing out the smoke out with his words.

You didn’t reply, just walking over to him, just being around him made you feel warm.

"Fuck its windy.” He says trying to light a new cig.

“C’you make me a house?” He asks.

You go up and put your hands around his cigarette, this not being your first time. Your hands wrap a little tighter to prevent the wind from burning out his flame. He joins you with his free hand helping, finally getting his cig to light.

 “Thanks doll” He smirks.

“No problem princess.” You reply earning a laugh out of him.

He takes his first hit with his and your hands still wrapped around it. He gets an up-close look at your hands, noticing how tiny they were, seeing all the scars that he never noticed, making a mental note to ask you how you got them later.

His head gets close to yours for the first time in a while due to his height. You glance at his face, noticing his features seeing some stubble growing on his face.

“You ain’t shave?” You ask, never seeing it in the past, while he was moving back up, blowing the smoke away from you.

“What, you don’t like my majestic beard? “He jokes. Making you giggle almost losing your balance before catching yourself on the wall.

  “s’too much work.” He starts. “You wanna shave it for me?” he says slightly leaning towards you. Handing you back your lighter knowing you didn’t need him to carry it because your pants actually had pockets in them for once.

You let out a soft laugh not responding again. He catches on, you got quiet when you were tired and he made out that you were walking towards your house.

“You going home?” he asks already knowing the answer.

“Yeah.” You respond more than happy to have him walk you back, him already moving to walk next to you.

He walks you home, you two talking about random shit, both of you forgetting about your skateboards leaving Makki to deal with them. And even though you’re drunk as fuck you’re still in the right state of mind, carrying a normal conversation with him. But just because you’ve built a tolerance doesn’t mean you can do basic tasks, like walk correctly.

When he reaches your house, he types in the keycode, your first dogs birthday, being glad that you, him and Makki have each other’s memorized.

He leads you into you house setting you on the couch, petting your dogs that ran up to him.

“Mommy’s not feeling too good” He said giving them the affection they deserved.

“Yes I am.” You slurred getting them attention on you now.

He walked over to your counter putting on the playlist that you two made together on shuffle, High fashion being the first to play. You didn’t like when it was quiet because too many thoughts would run though your head. You were in no way sad, singing the lyrics while you were laughing barely being able to hold yourself up as proof.

Remembering you were tired, he takes you off the couch and borderline carries you to your room, , setting you on your plush blankets that you had so many of because it was warm and comfy.

 “Easy, there. Try to sit up.”He said, trying to ask you what draws your pj’s were in because he didn’t want to snoop around; neither of you being bothered that you were half naked, what’s the difference between panties and a bikini, he thought remembering the times you’ve been to the beach together.  

Well it was maybe the fact that you were clinging onto him because u stumbled into him and he was closest stable thing around and you wouldn’t let go because it was cold and you couldn’t stop shaking.

 He ignores his thoughts and grabs the shirt he got out figuring you don’t need to change your bra because you told him and Makki that it was normal to keep it on for a few days after they were in awe as you were explaining how expensive they were. You calling Oikawa’s girlfriend to prove your point as she immediately agreed with you…Sometimes you might have got a little too comfortable with them.

You hear the song in the background change to Love Songs, you humming along, “Hope you smile when you listen.”

You were still holding on to him, your boobs squeezing against him, him only being able to put a t-shirt on you, while you looked up at him with your red glossy eyes making him burn up.  

You fidget timidly with your face now in his chest while gripping his sweater. Trying to build up the little courage you had. He tilts your head up making you look at him, wondering what you were thinking about.

  You try to express yourself, but you can’t get the words out him having no idea what is going on in your head at the moment.

“It’s okay to be nervous sometimes. Tell me” He gently says reading your body language. He was intuitive, so there was no way you could hide your feelings from him.

But you knew you could trust him, him having full self-control, always staying collected and following through on what he said he’d do.  He went out of his way to avoid any friction coming between you two, him never raising his voice or starting an argument.

“We need to talk.” You started. “About something important.”

“Ok…What is it?” He questioned rubbing his hands on your back. You were so nervous, were you really about to say this? Confess your feelings that you’ve pushed to the back of your heart for so long?

“I… I l… I love your face. And the stuff in it. and around it.” You spoke, being surprised you did it stutter.

He stood there, hands stopped moving trying to process what you just said.

“Just you, in general…”  You finally confess trying to state three things at once barely getting your words out.

But he understood exactly what you meant, or maybe he was warping what you said to fit what he wanted.

  "I don’t even know when I started liking you, but this shit won't go away." You restated

  Nope. He clearly just heard you say that.

  He doesn’t understand what’s so different about today. Yall have been in this scenario multiple times taking care of each other, sometimes including another into the mix.  

You didn’t understand either. You just felt like the time was right, even though you know it wasn’t the best idea to confess while you were drunk off your ass.

But you couldn’t help it, your feelings overflowing, which you never until this day let get the best of you, being vulnerable and trusting is not your usual . Youve never even had a crush on anyone, him being to only in your whole life to make you blush.

  Who you been vibin' wit and why I can't make you mine?

  You should have seen the signs that you feel for him when he helped that lady that lives down the street from him set up her Christmas lights or when he first met your dog that wasn’t fond of men, but it instantly liked him. And you loved his selflessness it was something you admired and applauded.

  “y/n” He tries talking you down, making sure you weren’t just saying this because of alcohol, deep down knowing he felt the same, you always being in the back of his mind.

You were generous with your time too, always being there for him. You knew he was softer than he appeared, he was tender, sensitive and vulnerable. He tried his hardest to not get into situations where anyone would get hurt, like breakups, arguments, and so on.

Which is why he won’t make the first move. He pushes his feelings to the back of his head. He values your friendship more than anything, but he can see what develops. If love is meant to be, it will happen.

I told you I am down for the worse or the better. But I keep sticking to you cause them four stupid letters

    “You make me so happy. And I’ll always care about you. Okay? He says breaking the silence, trying to reassure you.  

  “You mean so much to me—something I can’t even put into words because nothing can compare- I’ve wanted you since that day you tripped and bust your ass in the school hallway I still want you even though you drive me insane.”

  “Iss-“ You tried to get out only to have him continue talking over you.

  "I love that you can’t leave the house without a jacket. I love the wrinkles that appear on your forehead after you call me crazy. I love that it takes you hours to get ready. I love that you always know how to make me feel better. I love that even when you don’t agree with my decisions you always trust me to make them.  I love that when I spend a day with you, I can still smell you on my clothes; and I love that you are the last person I think of  before I go to sleep at night."

  You stood there awestruck for what feels like eternity until you mustered the bravery to speak “I didn’t expect you to feel the same way-” You said, being dumbfounded because from what you’ve seen treats everyone “nice”, were you really getting special treatment?

  He tilts your chin up, locking his dark eyes with yours. “Baby I don’t know if your notice but you and Makki are my only people that aren’t my family that call me my first name.”

He has a point. You think pushing yourself more into him, trying to fuse your bodies together to hide, not relaxing what you were doing to him. He tries to nudge your legs to the side but you won’t let go still clinging onto him.

“fuck” He groans. You pulling back wondering why until you looked down and noticed. A smirk appeared on your face as you reattached your self to him like velcro. You were feeling bold, the liquid courage still in your system driving you to slide your fingers down his chest, looking him in the eyes before stopping at his waistband.  

He knows what you’re doing, him being in this position multiple times. Does he really want to ruin your friendship like this? He hasn’t even asked you to be his girlfriend. He tries to push you off him already knowing you were gonna complain. But what he didn’t expect was for you to whimper out his name in that pretty voice of yours.

 He tried to keep his calm, blood already rushing down. “You know what you’re doing”

“yeah” You start.

“y’don’t want me?” Giving him your pouty face that you know he’s weak for, hoping that’ll work, insecurity piling up. Was it because your boobs weren’t that big or that fact that you were dressed like man? Was he not attracted to you right now, only liking you when you were dolled up?

“Fuck” You think. You should have worn something cute instead of dressing like a whole ass man even with your makeup fully done. Its not like you were supposed to know you were gonna get fucked today.

His were burning holes into you now, thinking of how to say “No, I would be more that happy to fuck you!” to his best friend, soon regaining his consciousness finally speaking.

“Fuck no doll, ive wanted you for a minute. You know me better than I know myself. How did you not notice my feelings?”

 You got me singing love songs, love songs, love songs

“You’re really hard to read” You replied trying to maintain your seductive act, resting your hands back on his chest.

“So are you.” He said lowering his head, you still looking up at him, taking in your gleaming eyes.

Sex ain't the only thing that's on my mind But you get me so excited, whoa

Your heart was beating so wildly that you could only take little sips of breath. His hands running down your waist stopping at your hips.

“Can I kiss you?" He asks "...yeah” you attempted to say as confidently as you could, nodding your head along with it.

His face bent down, hot mouth breathing over you. His lips slowly moved, brushing over yours, the liquor on his lips that you hated; only choosing fruity drinks even though you got relentlessly teased you for it.  You pushed further into the kiss desperately wanting more. Your teeth clicking his from being impatient, wanting to suck him in. Your hands sliding under his shirt subconscious desires reaching out.

Irreplaceable Tattoos from your neck that drop down to your ankles

“You’re drunk…” he says snapping you out of your trance.

“So are you.”

He dove in for another kiss much more passionate than the previous one, arguably needy, pusing you on the bed to which you more than happily comply. He tugs back not letting his mind get the best of him, disconnecting your spit trial leaving you panting. “You sure this alright?” He says deep down hoping you still say yes.

  You pull him back for your answer, your grabby little hands working their way back up his shirt. He gets the hint and pauses your lips rendezvous, taking off the turtleneck that he looked oh so good in, before seeing his unclothed body.  You’re admiring his body in a new way, before just complimenting him whenever he got a new tattoo, now up under him tracing them like a lovestruck teenager.

“When did you get this one?” You quietly ask, his ears closer to you than they’ve ever been.

“I got it that day you faked sick”

“What! You said were gonna take me!” You sulked, turning your head away from his as much as you could, crossing your arms.

He let out a slight laugh before gently taking your face in his hands, guiding you back into the kiss.

This is not really what he imagined for your first time. He’s an old-fashioned romantic who likes to take one step at a time. But then again nothing was ever normal with you. That said, when he falls in love, he falls deep.

“You’ve done this before?” You uttered.

“Hmm?” He mumbles, unmoving his lips from you kissing you, moving towards your neck.

“You still with that other girl?”

“No. I broke it off her, everything that came out of her mouth was bullshit, and no she wasn’t my girlfriend.”

“You didn’t trust her? You added. Trying to distract him until you could think of a way you could say “hey in my 21 years of life I’ve never got passed kissing a guy.”

“Our relationship was purely built on lies, I’d second guess everything she said. He replied, wondering if you were interrogating him.

“Why’d you wanna know?” He asked bringing his face up from your skin.

“…No one’s ever touched me like this, fuck.” You bashfully admitted, thoughts racing through your head that he didn’t want you anymore because you weren’t experienced.

But he knew what was running through that pretty head of yours, his fingers reaching out to with your hair trying to comfort you.

“You’re a virgin?” He curiously asked dragging his hand to your cheek, you leaning into it.

“y-yeah” you muttered trying to move your eyes away from his looking down at his body.

“I thought you had a boyfriend before” he said, softly turning your jaw to make you look at him. Your eyes diverted from his arms back to his eyes.

“We weren’t actually dating” You quickly say trying to clear up the misunderstanding. “He was my friend and seatmate that pretended to be my fake boyfriend to get me out of some trouble” you spewed out “and I guess I forgot to tell everyone that it was fake.”

“Even if we were that doesn’t mean we fucked.” You sheepishly replied.

“So… what trouble did your fake boyfriend get you out of.” He questioned knowing how much trouble it must have been for you, miss independent, to go to such lengths.

“Umm, well…this guy wouldn’t stop flirting with me even after I told him I don’t like him, even following me to my other classes.”

He wasn’t surprised, you were definitely a sight for sore eyes, in fact the prettiest thing he’s laid his eyes on, your beaming eyes, your dimple when you smiled, your pretty face, your “ugly” laugh, he could go on for days.

“Why are we talking about this” You whined, reaching your hand back out to him.

He took a hint and continued kissing you, bringing you closer to him while you attempted to take you shirt off. His hands helping you seeing as that you were struggling, being lost in his touch, finishing by moving you up more on you bed, pushing your plushies out of the way, to your protested because “they had feelings too.”

He ignored you, bending down to pull your panties off stopping once he saw the slick coming through them.

“Fuck baby you’re wet” He breathed dragging his fingers across your clothed slit earing a whimper from you, leaving his fingers drenched.

 Shawty, you wanna feel good, I wanna feel good too Don't I make you feel good?

“M’always wet.” you responded.

From what? He questions taking off your soaked cotton panties, tossing them to the side.

“From me?” He smirks bringing his hand back towards your heat. You not even comprehending what he just said, just knowing that you’re ashamed of how worked up you were getting.

You were in awe. You’ve always known his hands were big, but in this situation your mind wondered. His fingers were so much bigger than yours knowing you can barely fit two inside your with out it hurting, and not in a good way.

“Do you know how pretty you are? It’s honestly distracting.”. He says kissing down your whole body, stopping at your breasts, licking lazily around and coming back to the nub. The attention on your nipples making you squirm and he finally lets go, you grateful that he stopped or you would have almost cum, how embarrassing.

“I thought you said were gonna get them pierced” He remembered, you going on a whole rant about how cute they were.

“You said u were gnna get em with me” You looked back on, reminding yourself making him promise to get them with you because you were too scared of the pain.

“That was the same day you played sick and I got that tattoo.” He stated lightening the mood, hoping you can calm yourself down before you actually embarrass yourself.

He picks back up and continues kissing all the way down your body, you playing with his hair while biting your lip to muffle your moans and whine until he reaches your entrance.

He parted your legs, your pussy laid out before him, believing you no have reason to be shy about it either. He paused, admiring your swollen cunt and puffy clit, you were beautiful.

The feeling that he didn't want anyone else ever in his position overtook him. He let out a little breath on your clit and you thrashed around. He wasn't going to play. “I’ll take care of you.”

His lips travel over your skin, light and heated before settling himself between your legs, grabbing you by your thighs and dragging you closer. “That tickles.” you giggle, nerves making you kick your legs, almost hitting him in the face before he grabs them. He puts them down locking your legs with his arms, lowering himself until he’s on the ground facing you.

“Does it make you nervous when I stare?” he teases while your covering your face trying to hide the blush he caused.  He puts his mouth on you, quickly gripping your thighs, his hands leaving imprints in your skin dragging you even more into him, deprived kisses taking over your body. 

“yer so pretty” You purred seeing the sight of his big build between your legs, your fingers grabbing onto his curly dark locks, tugging them.

  Issei moans, his voice radiating through your body, forcing out a cry, blessing him with your pretty voice. “I-Issei!” You cry, never feeling like this before, your vibrator and hands doing it no justice.

“Shh, just look at me, doll.”

You can barely make out what he says, so drunk on pleasure. You try your best, doing anything to see the pretty man beneath you. But you get interrupted by your pleasure, your back arching not being able to control your body, grinding down to meet his lips, heat rising in you.

He kisses through your wetness playing with your bud. You choking on your spit, back arching again your body tensing up. “Issei,” You beg, grabbing him knowing what you want but not being able to express it. Luckily he can read you like an open book, knowing what you want, driving you over the edge as he makes you see stars. “Good girl,” he sighs when he feels you let go of his wrist letting him bring you your first orgasm.

“Look at your thighs shaking so much.” He teasingly cooed, wrapping his hands around them, bringing you out of your daze.

Shawty, your body is so exciting

Arching your back into the blankets, letting out a whine “Want your fingers.”.

He lets out a condescending laugh. “You need to learn to be patient. You just came and you’re already so eager for more?”

But by the time he finished your body went limp, you were totally weak, body loose-limbed and pliant. Your mind clouded by lust and deep in your own world. You gasped out a little sob, unable to comprehend anything beyond the discomfort and the need to have it gone. You can’t think straight all you can do is take action, grabbing his arm him easing his fingers into to you.

It’s not too tight, is it?” you ask clenching around his fingers.

 “Just relax… let yourself feel it” He says barely being able to move in you. Fuck so were so tight.

“I love the way you look with my fingers inside you.” He added starting to thrust them inside you, making you let out a string of moans.

“Look how good you take it.”  

“Fuck, you’re so messy.” He groaned feeling the slick running down his hands, before taking them out.

“Issei-i,” You cried when he pulled away, pleasure leaving you, tears coming back.

  He shushes you easily, his fingers wiping your tears. You were so precious to him, your moans music to his ears.  He slows down repositioning his fingers, making you let out a whimper squeezing around them. Your brains so crowded you can’t focus, can’t gather the strength to speak when he thrust them faster inside you.

  Your eyes rolled to the back of your head as you fell back, fingers curling inside you, chanting his name over and over, incoherent words coming out of your mouth begging for more. 

You pussy tightens as you cum, unable to breath, letting out gasps and whines. Him still fucking you, fingers not stopping, pushing them in and out relentlessly feeling both pain and pleasure. You lay there, wet in your own cum not giving yourself a break before you went and got what you really wanted, his cock.

His eyes followed the movement of your hands as they pushed down his boxers, revealing the length of his cock, that jutted proudly from his hips. He was so pretty, so virile and handsome. Wondering how lucky you were to be in such a position with him.

You pushed away those thoughts and focused on him, pulling him forward gently, but he followed his encouragement. One of his hands tilted his cock down toward your lips. “Open your mouth for me, baby.”

You parted them instantly, tongue sliding slightly outward, and then you whimpered as the warm weight of his cock slid into your mouth. You let your eyes flutter closed and swirled your tongue around the tip of his cock not knowing exactly what you were doing, but it was working, tasting the salty tang of the precum that wept from his leaking slit. You moved your tongue as the he put his hand into your hair, gripping the strands and pushing deeper into his mouth.

“You look so good on your knees like that. “He says meeting your eyes once again, almost cumming from the picture below him.

“Slowly, baby, I’m not going anywhere.” He says slowing you down by grabbing your hair, making a pace that you follow.

“Yeah, that’s it, baby, just like that.” Seeing that sinful look in your eyes with your redden swollen lips.

You moan feeling yourself drip down your thighs, getting even wetter giving him head. Trying to ease the discomfort by closing your legs, griding them together, trying to find some friction. Your ears hearing “That’s so fucking hot.” watching the scene unfold beneath him.

Your jaw hurts, trying got make him cum faster using your hands and lips together hollowing your cheeks. “Oh fuck, oh, Jesus, fuck yes, there, just like that, fucking Christ" he groans out, his voice sounded beautiful to your ears, knowing he was about to cum.

He finally lets go cumming in your mouth, you swallowing it all, trying not to wince at the taste. “Did I do good” You ask waiting for his reply. Your doll eyes, so red and worn out looking up at him for approval. Fuck he was whipped.

“Yeah…fuck baby”

I love when you get on top and you ride it

You get back under him, his cock resting on you, drenched and clenching around nothing, resting in your cum. You working yourself up against him.

“What makes you think I’m going to fuck you?” He says to your complaint.

“You’re not ready yet.” he mumbles against your whining. Spreading your legs, slapping your clit a few times before letting his cock rest on your folds. Finally getting “seated” he picks up your legs and puts them both on one of his shoulders your thighs warming his cock, your knees touching his cheek not moving, getting a kick out of how desperate your were for him.

“s-stop being mean” You cried reaching out for him to come closer, needing affection after all you’ve been though.

“Aww, poor baby, you want me to take care of it for you? He says leaning into you, reaching your kiss, tasting the remnants of the cum in your mouth.

He plundered your mouth and slowly teased his cock over your entrance, catching it against your clit and making you whimper into the kiss, clearly wanting to be fucked. Your kiss turned you sucking on Issei’s tongue and lips, biting the swollen pout until his lips were red and puffy. He pulled back and looked down at you, a beautiful mess under him.

His fat cock head pushed between your folds. The moan escaping both of your lips was primal. You were turned on beyond imagination and the way he was thrusting forward, spreading his leaking precum on your wet clit was almost too much. He quickly picked up his pace fucking your folds, his warm head brushing against your clit with every movement, but your greedy self wanted more.

The fact that he made you cum so easily made you proud. Just because you’ve never gone this far with someone else doesn’t mean you’ve never cum, you’ve had a lot of practice over the years, being insatiable, the sheets soaked underneath you from your previous orgasms being proof.

“Keep your eyes open, look at me, baby.” He moans getting your attention him.

You tried, you really tried, but the way he was stroking you, imagining what it’d be like to actually sit on his cock, the lewd sounds echoing in the background leaving you unable to focus.

He taps on your cheek eventually getting you look at him, keeping your mind on him by placing his fingers in your mouth you letting him, hazily sucking on them, not being able to close your mouth.

“Oh, baby, you’re drooling everywhere.” He grumbles. Your spit dripping onto his fingers, the friction of your thighs making him feral, moving at an even faster pace. Your body bouncing with every thrust.

“You gonna cum after I cum on your little clit? Come one more time for me, I know you’ve got it in you.” You sob feeling the puddle beneath you, time slowing, fire pooling in your tummy.  Listening to his words you let yourself go. You come with a silent scream as the pleasure ripped through your body, your nails scratching his soft skin. Your vison fading to black feeling him lose his rhythm and moaning a mixture of curse words along with your name, feeling him cum on your tummy before resting his head in your neck while letting your legs go.

“So good for me, look at how much you came.” He says breaking the static. You whining into his shoulder, emotions high, never doing this before.

“I know, baby, I know. I’m right here, just breathe.” He says. You two laying in silence for an unclear amount of time, him rubbing your back while you rest in his chest almost dozing off.

“Are we still…friends?” You croak out trying to hold back your sobs already knowing the answer that you two were defiantly not friends now and never would be just friends again.

“Friends don’t do this type of shit” He maintained grabbing your shoulders to sit you and him up. You were worried, did he only do this with you because he was drunk? You were anxious that you scared him away because you just poured your heart out to him and pushed yourself on him. You left your head down, tears already coming out to your dismay. You moved your hand up to wipe them but he beat you to it.

“Look at me… I love you.” He says holding your cheeks in his palm. You in awe, hoping that you weren’t imagining it, that this was real life.

“R-really” You question making him worry too, preferring to forgive and forget rather than letting this a divide between the two of you in case you went back on your feelings. You were so overwhelmed, never feeling love until this moment, so happy that the person you longed for liked you back. Yours tears running once again.

 “Shh, shh, it’s alright...Don’t cry.”

You don’t even know why you were crying, the hangover already getting to you making you get a headache. You groaning in his arms complaining that your head and throat hurt.

“Ill be back” he says detaching himself from you, letting you know he was coming right back.

He walks to your fridge opening it to see every drink but water, having too dig through all of them, especially the absurd amount of apple juice guessing it was your “once a year craving for it”. He finally got you some cold water, putting It in a cup and waked back to your room.

  “Issei” you whined not picking your head up from the pillow.

  “Shh baby im right here.”

  He sat down beside you on your bed lifting your head up. “Here drink this” he reassured, to which you ignored not wanting anything to go in your mouth, just wanting the day, or night as it was now, to end.

  “It’s just water, honey, look.” You sat yourself up with his help seeing him in just his boxers, you remembering your still naked, not caring enough to cover yourself. He held to glass to your mouth, babying you, tilting it far back enough to where you could drink it. The water hit the back of your mouth feeling like a shot making you cough.

“I know, it hurts. I’m sorry but we have to” He stated. You continued to drink it, feeling the stinging in the back of your throat, him comforting you, calling you “good girl” which was unsurprisingly working.

  He put the cup on your dresser when you finished, climbing back into bed with you leaning your body into his. “Have you ever thought about...us? Y’know, as an...item?” he said causing you to look at him with wide eyes.

 “Call me selfish, but I don’t ever want anyone else to touch you.” He insisted making you cheeks flush. You try to think of a way to respond, not wanting to keep him waiting.

“You’re the best thing that has, and ever will, happen to me. Not only am I deeply in love with you, you’re my best friend.” You stammer out, your shaky hands somehow made there way to his neck, letting them fall slowly before he grabs them dragging you in for a kiss before you got to even see his face.

“Everybody has always thought we’re a couple.” He continued taking his time kissing you all over your face. “Then I guess we should be.” You retort, kissing him back before you could see his reaction, not wanted to be embarrassed anymore today. But he caught you, holding you still “Really “y/n? Like deadass?” He asked.

  “Yes dummy, I want to be your girlfriend” You say causing him to grin swearing you’ve never seen him smile that big, before he gives you one last kiss.

  “I always kiss you on the cheek, why are you blushing now? He teases laying back down, you following along. You just snuggle into him mumbling something along the lines of “m’tired”, he understanding and speaking to you in a soft, gentle voice while helping you to bed, so he doesn’t make it harder for you to sleep by being loud. “I’m here love, I’m not going anywhere.” He whispers into your ear mkanig your heart swoon one last time before you pass out.

  “I l-love you issei.” You sleepily mumble.

“Tell me this when you’re sober.” He says stroking your head.

“Just relax, close your eyes...”He murmurs, your heart beating slower every second. Both of you together, lazy, slow presses. Limbs pressed together, chests heaving, fingers trailing down backs, tracing lazy patterns.

  “Oh!…” He remembers. “If you really wanna get them pierced, we could get matching ones.”

© all content belongs to spikesbimbo. do not alter or repost .

[marvelous-harry]

Caught In a Lie Part 2

Harry/Florence/Reader Warnings: Needles, Dom!Harry, Dom!Florence, Sub!Fem!Reader Words: 4.9K Summary: It's time for the dreaded doctor's appointment. A/N: This took so long to finish cause of life and general writers' block. Hopefully, the story will be worth the wait! Part 1 “Babe, it’s time to wake up,” Harry whispered as he sat down at the edge of the bed and stroked a hand over my hair. Whimpering, I pulled on the blankets while shaking my head. “Still sleepy,” I whispered. “Cuddle,” I added as I grabbed his hand and hugged it.

“It’s 9.30 am love. You need to get up and get ready. Your doctor’s appointment is at 11, remember?” Harry said softly, leaning down to hug me as he pressed kisses to my cheek.

“I don’t feel very well, we should reschedule,” I whispered, keeping my eyes firmly closed and burrowed further into my pillow and blankets.

“That just means it’s even more important that we go to the doctor, baby,” Harry sighed as he sat up.

“Nooo!” I protested as he put his hands around me and lifted me up. “No! I’m not going, you can’t make me. I want Flossie!” I whined as I finally opened my eyes and looked at him. “Flossie!” I whimpered and tried to get out of his hold.

“Florence is at work, she left hours ago. We are going to the doctor, now you have 45 minutes to get ready and have something to eat. I don’t care if you spend those minutes being a brat, I’ll take you over my knee and then drive you there while you’re still in your pajamas. That choice is yours,” Harry said sternly as he gripped my jaw.

I whimpered and hugged him tightly as he let my jaw go. “But I don’t want a spanking!” I told him, pouting as I looked up at him.

“Well you better behave then so I don’t have to spank you,” Harry said with a little smile as he poked my nose. Grumbling, I pressed my face against his neck and played with his cross necklace.

“I know you’re worried and overthinking it but I’ll be right next to you the whole time if that’s what you want. It’ll be over before you know it. You can squeeze my hand as tightly as you can the whole time,” Harry spoke gently. “You need to go get ready like a good girl now okay? I’ll go make you some toast for breakfast,” he said as he pulled back.

Nodding, I stopped playing with his necklace. “Okay but I don’t want any breakfast. I’m not hungry,” I told him as I started moving off his lap.

“I’ll chop you up some fruit and if you still don’t feel like having anything when you’re done getting ready we can just eat it later,” Harry replied as he got off the bed and pulled the blankets down and over to air them and the mattress out. I just hummed a little note as I walked into the bathroom to get a quick shower and get dressed.

-

Pulling the cardigan tightly around me, I chewed on my lip as I walked into the kitchen where I could hear Harry moving about. A quick glance at the clock let me know we should probably start driving into town soon.

“I’m ready,” I announced and sat down on one of the kitchen table chairs. Picking at my nails, I kept staring at them as Harry put a glass of juice and a little plate of different kinds of fruit on the table next to me.

Harry pulled up a chair and sat down in front of me. “You should try and eat some and have the juice,” he said, pulling the plate closer while nudging me with his knee.

I moved from my chair and sat down on his leg. Twirling a strand of his hair around my fingers, I kissed his neck before moving up to his mouth. Closing my eyes, I kissed him eagerly as his hands went to my hips. Moaning, I stroked my hand down his t-shirt and over his crotch.

“Baby, stop,” Harry said as he ended the kiss and moved my hand off his crotch. “But I want to taste you. Please!” I pouted as I moved my hand back and stroked him gently.

Harry grabbed my arm firmly and moved it away. “That is enough. Did you think you could distract me from your appointment by offering a blow job like I’m some sex-crazed teenager? Hmmm? Do not try to manipulate me again. Now drink up your glass of juice, have a few pieces of each fruit. We need to get going,” Harry helped me off his lap before spinning me around and landing three hard smacks on my covered bum.

Sitting down, I wiped my eyes quickly before grabbing the glass of juice and chugging it down while Harry cleaned up the chopping board and wiped down the counters.

“Harry? I ate three of each, is that enough?” I asked as I pushed around a little blueberry on the plate.

Harry turned off the faucet and dried off his hands before walking over. He tilted my head up as he looked at me seriously. “Yes it is, thank you for listening. Do you understand why I got cross and gave you those smacks?” he asked.

“Yeah,” I replied quietly. “Not nice,”

“That’s right. We use our mouths to talk and we discuss if we want something, and we don’t use sex against each other to get our will either,”

“I’m sorry!” I whimpered, grabbing his hand and pressing a kiss to his wrist.

“You’re forgiven, I understand why you did it but next time I won’t be as l nice about it,” He explained and pulled me up from the chair. “Go put your shoes on, I’ll put this away,” he pressed a kiss to my cheek before grabbing the plate and the empty glass.

--

I could barely pay attention as the doctor asked me a bunch of routine questions so my answers were all over the place and before I knew it the actual doctors’ appointment was over and we were being told to go wait outside the lab for my turn to go in.

“I think I’m going to pass out,” I said as we stepped out of the doctor’s office and close the door behind us.

“Just keep breathing and if you do pass out I will catch you in my big strong arms,” Harry smiled as he put his hand around me.

“You’re not funny,” I huffed as I poked him hard in the side causing him to grin.

Waiting until Harry sat down, I took a seat in his lap and started plucking at my nails again as the nerves kept getting worse and worse.

Harry laced his fingers with mine and gave me a little smile as I leaned against him.

“Number 309?” A nurse asked as she stepped out into the hallway and looked around. I looked up at her wide-eyed and held my breath.

“Is it okay if I come in with her? She’s a little nervous about getting her blood drawn,” Harry smiled as he squeezed my hand.

“Of course! Why don’t you both take a seat at the examination table and we can have a little chat before we start,” the nurse smiled. I looked at her and she looked nice enough. Walking into the room, I took a seat next to Harry - never letting go of his hand.

“So you’re a little nervous?” the nurse asked as she sat down on her little rolling stool and moved closer to us. I nodded and bit down hard on my bottom lip.

“Is it the needle that makes you nervous or having your blood drawn? Or something else?” she asked, clasping her hands together as she looked at me. Harry stroked his thumb over my hand when I took a bit to answer.

“The needle,” I replied quietly and looked away. “I’m scared it’ll hurt or that it’ll break inside my arm,” I mumbled.

“It’s very common to feel that way. Have you had any bad experiences in the past with getting your blood drawn? Ever fainted or something like that?” she looked at me curiously. I nodded.

“I used to get sick a lot as a kid so I was at the doctors and the hospital quite often and it always hurt so much when they’d draw blood or put an IV in. And I’ve never fainted, just felt very lightheaded and like I was about to,” I explained.

“I see, I see. I can’t promise you won’t feel anything at all but it shouldn’t hurt. It should just feel like a little prick and maybe something like a pressure feeling as I move the needle just slightly into your arm. As for the needle breaking, it’s very very rare, I’ve not heard or seen it happen ever. The needles we use are made from stainless steel and it would take a great deal of force for it to break,” the nurse glanced at Harry.

“How are you with needles?” she asked while rolling over to her hand sanitizer and cleaning her hands.

“I’m good,” Harry smiled back with a small nod.

“Wonderful,” the nurse smiled as she looked back at me. “What would make you more comfortable going through the steps of what I need to do beforehand or telling you whilst I’m doing it or just do it with how I usually do it?”

I licked my lips nervously and looked at Harry for help. “You have to decide,” he urged me. “Emm just do as you normally do I guess. I don’t have to watch right?”

“No, you don’t have to watch. Could you take off your cardigan please?” she asked while grabbing her rolling tray and an arm support stand.

Letting go of Harry’s hand I slipped off my cardigan and rubbed my palms against my jeans as I looked over all the things on her tray. Blood vials in different colours, a sharps container, cotton balls, tape, and a bunch of needles were on it.

“Let’s see what hand looks the most promising,” the nurse mused as she gently turned over my arm and gave it a quick little glance before grabbing the tourniquet and securing it around my arm.

Grabbing Harry’s hand tightly, I turned my head against him and rested it against his shoulder as I tried to remember to breathe. Whimpering quietly as I felt her move my arm up on the arm support stand, and clean the inside of my elbow, I tensed up and held my breath.

“Baby, you have to breathe,” Harry whispered as he pressed a kiss to my head.

Taking a deep breath, I tried to think of anything else but the fact that I was about to be stabbed in the arm.

“Little pinch now,” the nurse said, causing me to squeeze Harry’s hand as tight as I could. I could feel my eyes welling up with tears and I felt slightly lightheaded as I could feel the needle going in.

“You’re doing really good, I’m almost done,” the nurse said encouragingly as she switched out the vial and put another one in. I did a sniffle and whimpered as I felt her pull the needle back out.

“That’s it! All done!” she grinned as she pressed down on the cotton ball she’d taped over the little needle prick. “The results of the blood tests will take a few days till a week and then they will be sent to your doctor and you’ll hear from her if there’s anything you need to know,” she patted my arm before she started cleaning up.

Sitting up, I looked down at my arm and pressed down on the cotton ball just in case I was still bleeding out.

“Are you feeling okay? Feeling any dizziness or like you’re about to faint?” she asked as she rolled the tray and the stand away.

I shook my head. “No, not now. I was a little lightheaded earlier but it’s gone now,” I grabbed my cardigan and held it close.

“Wonderful, that means you’re free to go,” the nurse said as she stood up and opened the door for us.

“Bye,” Harry waved as he took my hand and guided me out of the room. He glanced around the waiting room to the lab to check no one was around before kissing me hard.

“I’m so proud of you, darling! You did it! So brave,” Harry gushed and peppered little kisses on my cheek.

Giggling, I grinned. “I did it,” I said quietly and looked down at my arm again, feeling quite proud of myself.

“Come on, let’s go home,” Harry put his hand around my waist and held me close as we started heading out.

---

“I can’t wait to tell Flossie and show her. Do you know when she’s off work today?” I grinned while practically skipping up the three little steps to our front door.

Harry followed me up the stairs and unlocked the front door and held it open for me. “She’s already home,” he smiled and pointed at her keychain lying in our designated keychain bowl.

“Flossie!” I called out and kicked off my shoes. “Flossie, where are you?” I yelled again and listened for her reply while taking off my cardigan, getting ready to show her my ‘bandage’. Walking into the kitchen, I whined as she wasn’t there. “Florence!” I looked at Harry as I walked into the living room. “I can’t find her and she isn’t answering me!” I whined.

Harry rolled his eyes as he put his wallet away. “You checked one room, baby,” he chuckled and put his hands on my shoulders. “Let’s go see if she’s upstairs,” he said and turned me around.

“Well to be fair the kitchen is her favorite room in the whole house so the odds were in my favor,” I grumbled slightly while walking up the stairs. Opening the door to our bedroom, I grinned happily. “Flossie!” I shouted and ran over.

Florence jumped and took the AirPods out of her ears as she turned around in her seat by the vanity and looked at Harry, who gave her a smile and a little nod before she looked at me.

“I did it! Look! I didn’t faint, bleed to death or cry!” I said as I put my arm out and showed her the little cotton ball taped to my arm.

“Baby! I’m so proud of you! Come here,” Flo smiled and opened her arms.

Sitting down on her lap, I gave her a tight hug. “The nurse was super nice and Harry held my hand the whole time,” I explained while pulling back.

Flo looked over at Harry who had taken a seat on the bed and was looking at us endearingly. “Have you thanked him for coming with you?” she asked, running her hand up my thigh.

I shook my head no and bit my lip as she got closer and closer to my crotch.

“Well, that just won't do. Why don’t you be a good girl and ask him if he’d like your mouth or your pussy as a thank you,” she said while pulling her hand back.

I nodded as I stood up, got undressed, and stepped over to where Harry was before getting down on my knees in front of him. Looking him in the eyes, I put my hands behind my back and straightened up my back. “Thank you for coming with me today, Harry. I wouldn’t have been able to get through it without you. I’d like to make you feel good, please. Would you like my mouth or my pussy to use?” I asked.

Harry let his eyes roam all over me, making me all hot and bothered as he put his hands on his knees and leaned forward. “You want me to use you, baby? As my own little fuck toy?” he asked with a slight smirk.

“Yes, please,” I replied eagerly.

Harry stood up and took off his jumper before shrugging off the rest of his clothes, letting it all fall into a messy pile on the floor.

Putting my hands on my thighs, I looked at his cock and took a little breath to calm myself as Harry wrapped his fingers around his hardening cock and slowly stroked himself. “Open your mouth,” he ordered.

Quickly opening my mouth, I stuck my tongue out for good measure and looked at him eagerly.

“Pretty girl,” Florence smiled as she walked over and stood by Harry’s side, putting an arm around him. She too had gotten undressed.

My whole body heated up with embarrassment and horniness as they looked up at me sitting here with my mouth open, on my knees, and pussy on display.

“Go on, get your lips around me,” Harry said finally as he let go of his cock.

Shuffling closer, I grasped the base of his cock as I took him in my mouth. Moaning, I closed my eyes and licked at the cock head.

Flossie pulled Harry down for a kiss. “Fuck,” Harry muttered against her lips as he put one hand on my head, grasping my hair while the other wrapped around Florence, pulling her even closer.

Relaxing my jaw, I took a deep breath before slowly easing Harry’s cock into my mouth until it hit the back of my throat. I kept it in as long as I could before easing back a bit and just bobbing my head trying to make Harry moan or grip my hair tighter, something to let me know I was doing good.

Looking up I could see that Harry and Flossie were still making out, and Harry’s hand had traveled down to her bum, squeezing and stroking it, not paying nearly enough attention to me.

I moved off his cock and licked at the head before letting my tongue lick from the base of his cock and all the way up to the head before taking just the cock head in my mouth and sucking on it.

“Fuck, that’s nice,” Harry moaned and stroked my hair. “We should move to the bed. I want to eat you out,” he said as he looked at Florence.

“No objections from me,” Flossie grinned as she got up on the bed and piled the pillows together to lean on before spreading her legs.

“I want to eat you out too!” I protested as I stood up and quickly got on the bed, crawling quickly up the mattress - wanting to get to her pussy first.

“You come lie next to me, you can eat me out later. Harry is going first,” Florence patted the spot next to her.

Letting out a loud whine, I shook my head and moved a little closer to her pussy. “Me first!”

“Don’t be a greedy brat. Move,” Harry said sharply before landing a hard smack on my bum.

“It’s not fair!” I grumbled as I moved over and lied down next to Flossie, cuddling up to her as I watched Harry get between her legs. “I’m the sub, I’m the one who’s supposed to eat pussy, and suck cocks, and give you pleasure!” I protested, sticking out my bottom lip.

“If that was the case you’d never be on the receiving end of oral ever, darling,” Florence chuckled before letting out a breathy moan when Harry spread her pussy lips apart and swiped his tongue up before giving her clit a little suck.

“Well obviously it’s your job as my doms to take care of me,” I mumbled as I watched Harry.

“You clearly need to get spanked more. Such a fucking brat,” Flossie said before smacking my ass.

Harry pushed Flossie’s legs further apart with a smirk before pushing his face close and licking at her hole.

“Fuck!” Flo moaned loudly and reached down, grabbing onto his hair and pulling him even closer. “Your fucking tongue,” she hissed.

Licking my lips as I moaned. I couldn’t tear my eyes away. Harry looked so good with his face buried between her legs. I didn’t know who I was more jealous of. Harry or Flossie.

“Can I touch myself, please?” I asked and glanced up at Florence. I knew I was soaking wet, feeling the slick going down my thighs.

“Don’t you dare. You’ll get the attention you so badly want in a minute,” Florence replied in between moans.

Biting my lip, I tried to ignore how that sounded more like a threat than a pleasant promise. I got up on my knees and put my hands down on my thighs as I figured it wasn’t too late to start behaving and maybe convince them I wasn’t that much of a brat.

Harry moved his lips up to Flossie’s clit and flicked his tongue over it quickly while opening his eyes and looking up at her.

“So close,” Flo moaned as she tightened her hold on his hair and rolled her hips against his tongue. Throwing her head back as Harry sucked and licked at her clit faster, Florence let out a long moan as she cummed. She panted as she closed her eyes and let go of Harry’s hair.

Harry took one last lick at her pussy before pressing a kiss to her clit. He climbed over her leg and wrapped a hand around my throat, squeezing lightly as he leaned in and kissed me.

Moaning against his lips, I spread my legs as I felt Flossie stroking her hand up my thigh and stroked her thumb over my clit.

“Please. Want to cum,” I begged as two of Flo’s fingers prodded at my hole but didn’t go in. “Please,” Harry took his hand off my neck and let it fall to my boobs, taking one in each hand and used his fingers to flick at my hard nipples.

Whining as I thrust my hips into Florence’s hand. “Please! Stop teasing, I’m so close already,”

“Lie down on your back,” Harry instructed before giving nipples one final tug before letting them go.

Eagerly lying down, I spread my legs wide apart and looked at them both pleadingly. “Flossie, Harry, please,”

Florence leaned over me and kissed me slowly while she rested her hand on my lower stomach. “You want Harry to fuck you, darling? Make you cum?” she asked just as Harry teased his cockhead against my pussy lips.

Nodding quickly, I took a deep breath to try and calm down. “Please! You know I get so turned on watching you two, so hot,” I said while glancing between them.

“Oh, we know,” Harry smirked before thrusting his cock into me.

“Oh god, fuck!” I gasped, grasping onto the bedsheets and arching my back.

“All better now? Got your pussy all full and nice,” Florence teased running her fingertips up and down my stomach. I nodded, enjoying how Harry was thrusting in and out of me so deeply.

“She’s so fucking wet, love” Harry groaned as he dug his fingernails into the skin of my hips. “Don’t blame her. You’re very sexy when you get eaten out,” he grinned.

Florence chuckled and moved closer to give him a hot, deep kiss. “Not as sexy as you look between my legs,” she gave him one more kiss before giving my clit a little slap.

Letting out a little shout, I clenched around Harry’s cock and looked at them shocked. “I think I just came,” I said quietly and panted.

“From me slapping you? Did it feel nice?” she asked as she rubbed her finger over my clit.

Whimpering, I squirmed as it was even more sensitive now. “Yeah, definitely came, and no! I barely felt anything,” I whined and looked at them sadly.

“Poor little slut. Didn’t get to cum the way she wanted,” Harry teased while Florence kept rubbing my clit. “Nearly cummed as well when you clenched so tightly around me,” he said while fucking me faster and harder.

“With Harry being so generous and fucking you so nicely I think you can cum again, darling,” Florence smiled widely as she brought her hand up to my mouth and put two fingers into my mouth.

Sucking on them, I blushed and held her hand as she fucked my mouth slowly with her fingers.

“Yeah, you can,” Flo smirked and took out her fingers and put the wet fingers on my clit, stroking them up and down.

“Fuck, Flossie, please. Too sensitive,” I whined but pushed up against her and Harry as I could feel the familiar feeling of an orgasm building again. Her wet, soft fingers felt so good as she rubbed them over my clit.

Harry sped up his thrusts. “Going to cum soon,” he warned, closing his eyes as he held on even tighter to my hips.

Florence started swiping at my clit faster. “Doesn’t that sound nice, baby? Get filled up on Harry’s cum? Making him feel so good, pet. Such a good girl for us aren’t you?” she whispered close to my ear.

“Good girl for you,” I mumbled out, my fingers twitching against the bed. “I’m gonna cum,” I moaned, feeling so close again. “Please, can I? Need to cum,”

“You can cum, baby. Cum around Harry’s cock,” Florence said moving her fingers as fast as she could while Harry fucked me just as fast.

Moaning loudly, I held on tightly to the bedsheets as I cummed for the second time. Harry was moaning as well, blending together with mine as he buried his cock deep into me, filling me up.

He was breathing heavily and a strand of hair was handing over his forehead as he did a few lazy thrusts. “Fucking hell,” he breathed out before pulling out slowly.

Florence stopped rubbing at my clit and pushed her fingers into my pussy. “Jesus, you weren’t lying when you said she was wet,” she chuckled and did a few thrusts with her fingers before pulling them out. “Taste yourself and Harry,” she said and held the fingers to my lips.

Shuddering, I poked my tongue out and let it swipe over her fingers before opening my mouth and sucking off his cum mixed with my juices. I couldn’t help but moan at the taste and clean every inch of her fingers.

“Fucking hell, going to make me hard again already,” Harry said as he watched, propping himself up on his elbow.

Flo moved her fingers back down and eased them into me again.

Again, I couldn’t help the little moan that escaped me.

Florence smirked as she pumped her fingers into me a few more times before pulling them out and landing a smack to my pussy.

Letting out a little scream, I whimpered as I looked up at her with tired, hazy eyes. “Please, no more” I begged, seeing the look in her eyes.

“You got one more in you, I know it, pet. Harry, why don’t you pass me that clit vibrator that’s in the drawer and hold her hands down for me?” she asked and held out her hand.

“No, please. It’s too much, Flossie, please, I can’t cum again,” I pleaded as I brought my legs together and placed my hands over my pussy to protect myself while letting out a little sob.

“Here,” Harry handed over the vibrator before grabbing my arms and putting them over my head. He held them together with one of his hands and pulled on one of my nipples while he gave me a kiss. “Just one more, you can do it,” he whispered.

Florence spread my legs and kneeled between them as she ran a teasing finger over my sensitive clit. “You can cum when you need to,” she said while placing the vibrator against my clit.

Whimpering, I squirmed and tried to lift my arms up but they were so tired they had no chance against Harry’s grip. I got the tiniest little warning as I could hear Florence turning on the vibrator before I felt it come to life. My eyes closed and my mouth fell open as I tensed up. I could feel my orgasm building up but fuck it hurt so good. “P-please,” I stuttered out and tried opening my eyes to look at them but my eyelids were too heavy.

Harry kissed my nipple before taking it in his mouth. He placed his teeth around and pulled on it slowly before letting it go. “Turn it to the highest setting,” he told Flo and looked at her with a grin.

There was a quiet little click again before the vibrations got super strong. Pressing my heels down onto the bed, I arched up slightly and my legs trembled as I orgasmed for the third time. Collapsing back down on the mattress, I felt the vibrator getting turned off and Harry letting go of my arms.

Catching my breath, I smacked my lips as I let Harry and Flo move me around till I was under the blankets. “M’melted,” I mumbled as Harry wrapped his hands around me and pulled me close to his chest.

“Get some rest, darling. You’ve earned it,” Flossie said softly and pressed a little kiss to my forehead. I just hummed before my breath evened out and I fell into a deep, restful sleep.

Masterlist

[winter-soldier-vibes]

You Aren’t Somebody? (Bucky x Reader)

Bucky x reader

Word count: 2647

Summary: Bucky knows that the reader has struggled with an eating disorder before, but thought they were doing better. Little does he know, they had just gotten better at hiding it. Until one night, he catches her doing something she had promised she had stopped

Warnings: eating disorder, purging, angst, fluff

Tags @abitgryffindorky @buckys2thicc @thatfangirl42 @buckfics @barnesplums @mardema @stucky-on-spiderman @thundering-barnes

Main Masterlist

A/N: It’s finals week and I am running on energy drinks, reading fanfiction, and longgggg hot showers. But the semester is almost over, and then I have no obligations aside from my hobbies. I see the requests and I’m working on them I promise! I have a list of all the requests that I get, and I am working through them I PROMISE!!! Thank you all for all of your support.

A/N 2: This deals with heavy and dark themes of mental illness. The specific warnings are above. If you feel that in any way reading this will be harmful to your mental health and your journey, PLEASE skip it. I write from my own experience and I know what I would’ve wanted to hear in these situations, and writing/reading fics helps me feel comforted. This fic is based on one experience more specifically than most of my fics, so I apologize if it’s not exactly the same as your experience. This is what I would’ve wanted to hear. If you need or want someone to talk to, vent to, or get advice from, feel free to message me, really. I’m here! <3

------------------------------

Bucky was standing in front of you, blocking the door. His piercing blue eyes were locked on you, your own refusing to meet his. 

He wanted answers that you were not ready to give.

“Y/n, please. I just want to talk about this”

“There’s nothing to talk about, Bucky.”

He looked you up and down. Your hair was in a messy bun, a few loose strands sticking to your tear stained cheeks. Your eyes were puffy, and your face was red, voice raspy. He took a deep breath. “You told me you would tell me if it was getting bad again.”

“You promised.”

You closed your eyes. He wasn’t wrong, you had promised. But that was because you never thought you’d see the day when you were purging again. You thought you had gotten over it. You really thought that this time you wouldn’t slip up.

------------------

You had been struggling with an eating disorder for a while. The cause, you weren’t quite sure. An innocent diet soon turned into a competition for yourself, but the end goal was never there. At first you had thought it was just about the weight and how you looked, but then you found that some of your behavior patterns were tied to your emotional ones. 

Stress was the major trigger, you had come to learn.

Whether it was a mission gone wrong, you getting injured, someone else getting injured, or even just basic social interactions you thought could’ve gone better, you found yourself inclined to comfort yourself with food. 

Until you panicked, which would lead you to the bathroom with music blaring and water running to cover up the noises of your retching. 

You hated it, and every time you told yourself it was the last time. But the more you did it, the more you felt the urge to do it. At first it was triggered by large stressors, but now smaller things could trigger you to want to throw up. You tried to keep it hidden, unaware of the true reasons for why you did it. You were able to help yourself sometimes, it wasn’t worth bringing anyone else into. 

You couldn’t explain it to yourself, so how were you supposed to explain it to anybody?

The best way that you had figured out how to describe it was that whenever you felt a negative emotion, you could soothe it in a physical way with food, especially with all the warm comfort foods that are known. But at the same time, that feeling lasted as long as you could taste, and you would feel guilty as you felt full. When you threw up, it felt like you were also throwing up the negative emotions. 

But when you said it out loud, it didn’t make sense. When people are sick and throwing up it’s one of the most uncomfortable feelings ever. Inducing it hurts sometimes, but it’s almost not as bad. Like you know it’s coming, and you’re in control of what’s happening and you could stop at any point. And there had been times where you could soothe yourself in other ways, and you knew your own physical limits. You knew when you had to stop for your own health.

Until you couldn’t stop.

Which is what led to you fainting on a mission after purging too much. Your electrolytes had bottomed out and you almost had a heart attack at an age no one should. Bucky, your boyfriend who was on the mission with you, had put it together when the first words out of your mouth upon gaining consciousness were “Is this a glucose drip?” while tugging at the IV.

He hadn’t been mad, not exactly. He wasn’t mad at you but he was furious with himself for not noticing, and for making you feel as though you couldn’t tell him. You assured him that you did trust him, but he wished you had come to him before you could’ve gotten yourself, and those on the mission, seriously hurt or killed. 

Nonetheless, you still didn’t know how to talk about it.

“Can you try to tell me about it?” he asked gently, running a hand through your hair. He held you to his chest, you unable to meet his eyes.

“It won’t make any sense,” you had said, tears glazing your eyes.

“I want to understand. Can you help me understand?”

You paused for a moment. “It’s a long story and I don’t know where to start. There’s so much going wrong.” you had said, tears beginning to streak down your face.

“I have all the time for you. And it doesn’t have to make sense, these things rarely do. I’m not here to judge you, I’m here to listen.”

And true to his word, he had. He had listened and held you while you tried to talk about what you could. He didn’t understand everything, he naturally had a ton of questions, but they weren’t for that moment. He had promised to help you the best that he could, and you had promised to try and tell him whenever you felt the urges get too strong. And if you couldn’t, to tell him after.

It was easier to talk to Bucky than anyone else. Not because he was your boyfriend, but because he seemed to understand you more than anyone else could. He had his own share of mental health struggles. Neither of you knew exactly what the other was going through, but you both understood that it was easy to feel alone and guilty even though you couldn’t control it. 

It was rough, but he was never mad. He was sometimes firm, and sometimes you had gotten angry with him. Only to later apologize to him with tears in your eyes. He was never mad with you. He understood that this was something internal. Upon research he had done and conversations he had had with Bruce, he understood that this had nothing to do with him. Some people thought eating disorders were about getting attention when it was one of the furthest things from the truth.

All he could do was love you and be there for you.

And to your surprise, talking about it did help.it took a long time, months, of long and hard conversations, panic attacks, slip ups, and really dark days. But it got to the point where Bucky felt that you were doing better, making an effort to tell you how proud he was and how much he loved you. 

And you were doing better, in a way. But you had been slipping up more recently, and you hadn’t told Bucky. You didn’t know how. After going the longest you’d ever had between slip ups, you found yourself retching over the toilet. You would have gone to Bucky but he had been away on a mission that was extended a few days. You couldn’t interrupt him because your feelings were too much to handle. People needed his help more than you did.

You were going to tell him, but he had been so tired when he had come back. He needed his time to relax, and it wasn’t the right time to tell him. And the next day when he was rested, you felt that it was irrelevant. Any negative feeling you had felt the day before had since past, and you didn’t see the point in bringing it up today. It would worry Bucky, he wouldn’t want to go on missions, and you weren’t going to do that to him. Besides, it was just one time.

Right?

You soon found yourself purging when Bucky wasn’t around. If he had gone out with Steve, if he was on a mission, or if he was down in the gym you found yourself taking more opportunities to give into your urges. It wasn’t nearly as bad as it had been, but you were spiraling. But at this point you had been slipping up so many times, you had been so secretive about it. 

It would kill Bucky inside to know that you were hiding this from him again. He would feel like you didn’t trust him. You trusted him with your life.

You just didn’t want to let him down. Not again, not when he had explicitly told you to come to him and you had been blatantly ignoring that.

You wanted to tell him, you did. But you couldn’t let him being so proud of you be based on a lie.

One day you were hunched over the toilet, legs sahking and tears streaming down your face from exertion. Bucky was away on a mission, so you didn’t even bother with the music or the water. What you hadn’t anticipated was him coming back hours earlier than he should’ve

The mission had gone much more smoothly than anticipated, which everyone was happy about. Bucky was glad he would get a few more hours with you. He had gone up to your shared room and let himself in, surprised to see you weren’t there. But then he heard you coughing from behind a closed bathroom door.

He felt like someone had punched him in the gut. You had been doing so well, what had happened?

He walked over to the door, knocking on it and calling out your name. He heard you muffle a small fuck before he knocked again.

“Y/n please, let me in.”

He heard the toilet flush and the sink turn on, you on the other side washing your face. You could feel the tears from exertion be replaced by ones of shame and embarrassment, biting your lip slightly. What the fuck were you going to tell him? 

When you finally turned off the water, you rubbed your face with a towel, sighing heavily into it. When you took it away, you looked long and hard at the doorknob. 

Bucky sighed on the other side of the door. “Y/n please. I’m not mad. We’ve been here before, I just wanna talk to you.”

You closed your eyes for a moment, taking a breath before you made your expression nuetral and opened the door. 

Bucky’s eyes immediately saddened when he took you in. your face was still red and there were tears in your eyes. You had tried to put up a front, he could tell that too. Sometimes you got angry with him because you didn’t want to be vulnerable. He was prepared because like he said - he’d helped you before.

Before he could say anything you crossed your arms. “You’re home early,” you said coldly.

“Y/n.” 

“How’d the mission go? Well, I assume.” you tried to slip past Bucky but he was blocking the door. 

Bucky took a deep breath. “Yeah, yeah, the mission went well.” He wanted to be gentle with you. “But how are you?”

You shrugged, trying to appear oblivious. “I’m fine,” voice wavering slightly as you looked away.

“Y/n please. You’re not fine. Can you tell me what happened?”

“The same thing that always happens” you said bitterly. “Something stupid comes up, I start feeling like shit about myself and I ignore it until I’m puking it up with everything else, alright? It’s the same story, different time, and now I have you looking at me all hurt just like I was worried about which is why I couldn’t tell you!” you exclaimed, eyes filled with anger and tears. Bucky looked at you as if you had just punched him in the face. He would’ve much preferred that you had.

“Y/n.”

You shook your head, trying to get through the door that he was blocking. “Bucky, just let me through the door, forget it.”

“Y/n just talk to me please, I -”

“JUST LET ME THROUGH THE GODDAMN DOOR.” You yelled, surprising Bucky. It had been a while since you had gotten this angry or defensive. But he stood his ground. Bucky was standing in front of you, blocking the door. His piercing blue eyes were locked on you, your own refusing to meet his. 

He wanted answers that you were not ready to give.

“Y/n, please. I just want to talk about this”

“There’s nothing to talk about, Bucky,” you said, feeling tears threatening to spill over. 

He took a deep breath. “You told me you would tell me if it was getting bad again.”

You closed your eyes and felt a pang in your stomach. “Bucky, I - “

“You promised,” he said, voice cracking.

You shook your head. “Why do I have to talk about this. It’s not like I’m hurting anybody” 

“You’re hurting yourself, y/n.” he said calmly.

You shook your head and narrowed your eyes slightly, tears falling. “That’s different Bucky, you know it is.”

“You aren’t somebody?”

You looked at him for a moment before a sob escaped your body, leaning on the counter for support as you brought a hand to your mouth. Bucky quickly came up behind you and pulled you into him, wrapping his arms around you. You started crying harder, embarrassed and ashamed. 

“I’m sorry Bucky, I didn’t know what else to do, I didn’t know how to tell you, I -”

“Hey it’s okay, it’s alright y/n, I’m here.” Bucky kept whispering reassurances in your ears, rubbing a hand up and down your back. 

After some time passed, you didn’t know how long, you were able to calm down enough to take some shaky breaths, hiding your red face in Bucky’s chest.

“When did this start happening again?” he asked softly

“I don’t know… few weeks at least, not really sure.”

He took a breath, trying to stay calm. A few weeks and he hadn’t suspected anything, and you were alone. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“You were on a mission, I couldn’t interrupt that.”

“Why didn’t you tell me when I got back?” he pressed gently.

“You were so tired Bucky - ”

“Y/n.” he said more firmly.

You paused for a moment, knowing he wouldn’t take those answers. If they were truly the reason then you would’ve told him the next day or the day after, as soon as the opportunity came. There was more to why you waited, and Bucky knew that. 

“I didn’t want to disappoint you,” you whispered. 

You heard Bucky sigh. He was angry with himself, for not being approachable to you. All he wanted was to make you feel safe enough to come to him, and to hear that you hadn’t because you thought he had expectations for you crushed him. “Y/n, I told you you could tell me about this. When have I ever been disappointed or angry with you?”

“You haven’t. You were just so proud and I - I didn’t want to ruin that for you. I didn’t want to tell you that you were proud of a lie.”

“Hey, hey look at me.” Hesitantly you looked up to meet his eyes. “None of this was you lying. You put in the hard work day after day, and I told you I was here to support you. But I never did the work for you. You did that. I’m proud of you and I always will be because you’re a fighter. It’s okay to have bad days, it’s okay to slip up. It’s okay to need a little help too, and that’s what I’m here for. A slip up doesn’t erase all the hard work you’ve put in before. I’m proud of you for the progress you’ve made, and of the work you put in. This doesn’t change anything sweetheart.”

He pulled you back into his chest.

“I’ll always be proud of you.”

[thithesandofferings]

“Open Wide”- Ogami Shirou x Reader

TW: 18+ MINORS DNI!! Dom!Shirou/Sub!FemReader, Comeplay, Choking, Voice Kink, Rough Sex, Praise Kink, Degradation, lil bit Size Kink SMUT!!

This is bad .

“Look at you Alan, I thought you said Purebloods didnt get Nirvalys Syndrome? Let me put in into you, before you lose your mind”

Who says stuff like that to the enemy? Ive never seen Shiro this angry before. Especially to say words like that. He barely speaks at all most days. Only when he absolutely has to. This should surprise me or- or stress me out but-

It's so hot.

Link to my Ao3 for this fic= https://archiveofourown.org/works/25414948

This is bad .

“Look at you Alan, I thought you said Purebloods didnt get Nirvalys Syndrome? Let me put it into you, before you lose your mind”

Who says stuff like that to the enemy? Ive never seen Shirou this angry before. Especially to say words such as that. He barely speaks at all most days. Only when he has to. This should surprise me or- or stress me out but-

It's so hot.

“Hey you! Look alive we gotta go!” Michiru yelled, startling me out of a downward spiral.

She was right. I had to get out of there before the place was destroyed to shreds. I could barely think. All I could think about was Shirou splitting that evil bastard's mouth open and putting his power inside it.

I couldnt help but feel jealous.

His wolf had such a presence on its own, how could I not be affected.

I needed to get it together, there were still people that needed to be saved. I shook my head and ran after Michiru towards Shirou. She was chattering excitedly, but I honestly couldnt understand anything she was saying. My eyes were on him.

He must’ve caught something in my gaze because he turned his attention to me.

“You okay?” His voice was gruff from exertion and I had to take a calming breath from the shiver that coursed down my spine. He caught that too.

“I should be asking you that Shirou” I looked away, but with a sideways glance I grumbled that he was, in fact, amazing. He raised his nose a notch, almost an afterthought,  and I could see him take a deep breath.

With his penetrating gaze solely on mine, I could feel my pulse jump and my temperature rack up a thousand degrees, I had to look away. He scoffed, almost smugly, and slid attention back to Michiru, who was still talking and running around. Something about having Shirou howl to the town.

We watched as he changed into his silver wolf form again to howl into the microphone. It was a beautiful site to see. Seeing all the animals completely stop what they were doing just to howl with him. Alan had no idea what he had been talking about.

Shirou had the Howl.

Michiro and I could only watch in awe. We were born human turned animals so we didnt have the innate instinct to go along with him. It was such an eye-opening experience, so much so that I felt a little empty at not being able to do it. Shirou looked so regal, the urge to fall on my knees in front of him was an encompassing feeling.

Shaking violently at the thought, I had to blow out a long soul-suffering sigh. Michiru glanced with eyebrows in an “are you okay” motion and I could only just nod.

What is going on with me? Where are my thoughts?

I had hoped that thoughts of Shirou would leave. The attention was of us and finally life was, in all intensive purposes, back to normal. Michiru was able to hang out with her fellow friends, and I- was able to start my work in the office.

Except, I could get nothing done.

Shirou was constantly in my peripheral, working on whatever case was in that week. But when he wasnt there, he was in my mind whispering in his growling voice about the things he could do to me.

I was dying.

There would be times where I would stare at a research book, never turning the page, just staring. It was becoming so hectic that Shirou asked if I needed time off.

“I know its been hard for everyone” Shirou had said. He had been in that leather jacket again. Who wears gloves inside? Why was it so hot?

Its not fair.

“What's not fair?” I looked up from his gloved hands and I could feel my heart rate sky rocket in panic.

I said that out loud.

His gaze is so piercing, it felt like he was staring into my soul. He was leaning on my door frame, completely relaxed. His usual bored expression was placed with something that was almost- teasing? Not that couldnt be right.

But it had been the same expression and mood for weeks now. His casual bumps and grins were so much that Ive had to actively avoid him before I had a heart attack. I wasnt in control of my emotions half the time, so any sort of embarrassment would make me change into my animal form. Even through his cold demeanor, it still seemed like he was laughing at me. I'm sure he could tell that I was flustered, especially when he turned into his wolf form. It always made my blood pressure go up and something slick slide down my thighs.

Which is what was happening now.

Oh no.

I prayed that he wouldnt notice anything amiss, but the world wasnt on my side. He lifted his nose up again and sniffed. It was as if he was trying to find someone miles away, but when he finally looked towards me, his pupils were wide open. Alert.

“You never answered my question.”

There was a hitch in my breath at that tone. That growl that Ive been dreaming about for weeks.

I’m so fucked.

“I-i uhm… sorry what?” I could feel myself blinking rapidly. I couldn’t get my thoughts in order. This was getting ridiculous.

“You humans are very odd,” Shirou rose up from the door, and for a moment I felt relief only to freeze when he closed my door.

With him still inside. We’re alone.

“You even more so.”

He walked slowly towards my desk. Well more like prowled. There was intent in his walk.

I’ve never felt more like prey than right now.

“I’ve seen the way you’ve been looking at me” He’s whispering now. His gloved fingers gently spread out to the edge of my desk and he leans over it.

He’s so close.

“I smell you all day. Its intoxicating.” One hand lifts up and brushes my cheek, I know he can feel the heat.

“You’re the first human that I have ever wanted”

I froze.

Hes been feeling the same? From his expression and the dropping of at least two octaves, it was definitely confirmed.

“I- uh I want you too” My voice was hoarse from emotion. He could hear it just fine it seemed because if his pupils werent blown out before, they sure were now.

Shirou visibly licked his lips and I couldn’t help but follow the motion. He watched me watch him and he grinned, showing his fangs in satisfaction.

“Good because I plan to devour you. Stand up”

I could barely hear the order due to his growling. His ravenous expression was drowning me. I was swimming in heat and desire.

“I wont ask again”

Shirous’ voice snapped me back into reality and with shaky sweaty palms I pushed my chair away and stood. He never told me to move so I just stayed there. He seemed very pleased that I didn’t move.

Not like I could, I was barely able to breathe.

He stalked slowly around my desk until he was behind me, moving the chair completely across the room. It crashed into a plant and I jumped, still not moving an inch.

I could feel his breath across my nape and goosebumps coursed down my skin. I could feel him smelling my hair, breathing in the sweat that I felt that I was pouring out. I tried to move away, embarrassed, but I could feel his grip tighten and him growl at my into my neck.

“Stay still” He whispered. “You can be a good girl and do that for me right?”

I froze at the pet name. I’ve never heard him call me anything other than my last name. I couldn’t believe how it affected at me. I could feel myself become even more drenched.

He could tell.

“Oh? You like that huh?”

I felt his leathered hands slide slowly underneath my shirt and palm my breast. I gasped, my head falling on his shoulder at the groping. This was getting intense fast. I heard something tearing and tried to glance down only to have one of his hands press lightly at my neck. Holding me still.

Shirou shushed me, keeping his hand curled around my throat. Murmuring something about not needing this or that, I felt fabric fall at my feet and my chest became covered in hot leather. I let out a choked moan, only to have his grip tightened.

“You’re gonna have to be a quiet pup, you don't want all your colleagues to know what you're doing right?” He was so mocking, I couldnt help but feel flustered with how demeaning he sounded.

I nodded knowing I couldnt say anything in this position.

“Thats right, good girl, now go on bend over the desk” He slipped his hands away and disorientation readily slid back into my head.

I laid over my desk, paper be damned, and wrapped my hands over the edge to hold on. I heard him growl in confirmation at the act and I preened at the act of pleasing him.

I’ve never felt this way. I was completely ok with him taking the reigns. I didnt have many braincells left, I could barely think. All I could do was just do.

Shirou hands caressed my ass in appreciation, his ungloved hand (when had that happened?) made a purposeful track up to my waistband, hastily taking them off. I was completely soaked and hearing him swear obscenities definitely didnt help.

“I can’t wait to knot you, pup” I felt his weight against me, his bare chest completely covering my whole body. He was so warm, degrees hotter than his normal, his breath hot on my cheek as he licked my face from chin to forehead.

“The real question is,” he says through licks down my spine. “Which form do I want to take you hm?” I shivered violently at the thought of Shirou taking me in my wolf form. Outside of Anima city it is forbidden to have any of those kind of thoughts. But you couldnt help that you constantly thought about Shirou fucking you in his wolf form.

I could hear his deep chuckle at my spine. He knew my answer.

I felt him nose my wetness and my breath hitches. It didnt last for more than 5 seconds and I could hear myself grown out against the desk.

“I would love to taste you, but unfortunately we dont have that kind of time.” There was a zipping noise and I tensed, gushing even more at the thought of what it could be.

“I would need hours to be satisfied from your taste” He is suddenly in my ear. “But I plan to fuck you like you need it.”

I could hear myself mewling at the thought. I’ve been wanting this for weeks. I cant believe someone like Shirou even wants to touch me. Shirou, cool-mannered and distant, wants to fuck me five ways to Sunday is honeslty an eye opening experience.

There is a clicking sound and I gasped. I was so absorbed in my thoughts that I didnt feel the fingers. I could feel myself clenching around and my mewling became even louder. Colleagues be damned.

There was an surprised hum from behind me.

“You’ve been touching yourself?” All I could do was nod embarrassed. He cooed sweetly and added 3 fingers inside of me.

“What were you thinking about? Were you thinking of me? Tell me” I gasped in affirmations. I couldnt take it anymore. I needed inside of me now.

I felt like I was going to die.

“P-please Shiro, I need it.”

“You need what pup?” He grinned savagely and I felt something hard and hot against me.

I wiggled in frustration. Only to have him laugh and hold my hips still. Using his strength to make me stay still.

I was going to have bruises.

“Please fuck me Shirou” I whispered into my shoulder. I knew he could hear me. I felt my chest tighten at the gasp and growl.

“Good girl.” I shivered and gasped as he pushed the head in with a savage force of his hips.

“I wont hold back pup” He laid his furry chest against my back “You might be ruined for any one else.”

“I dont want you to Shirou, give me your all”

A growl was heard and then the most intense feeling of my life was radiating through my whole body.

He thrusted so hard that I could hear the desk screeching. The other colleagues, if they were still there, would definitely hear it. I prayed that they weren’t gonna check to see if I was okay. I wouldnt be able to speak anyways. I’m pretty much holding on dear life on the desk. There was no way I was able to explain anything.

Shirou didn’t seem to care either. The constant growling and heavy breathing that was coming from him was telling.

“Youre so tight, I cant believe all of me fit inside of you” He groaned and all I could do was tighten around him, which made him go even faster. There was a crack from the desk, but I ignored it. All I could concentrate on was the heat and his cock bruising my insides.

“Mine mine mine MINE” He stopped abruptly and pulled out. Only to pick me up effortlessly and turn me around, my back hitting the desk.

He entered me again and with that the world was crashing around me. I’d never come so fast in my life. Watching him in his wolf form growl over me as he pounded me into the afterlife, I wasnt gonna last long.

Seemed like he wasnt either, his thrust got more savage and I got louder. He took his right hand and placed it at my throat again to cut off the noise.

“Be quiet while I shove my knot inside you, I need to concentrate” It made me fall again, shivering while he grinded his knot inside me. He came with a roar, tightening his hands on my throat, cutting off my sound.

“Shhhh, good girl, you did so good” He whispered praises to me while he continued to grind himself inside me. He lifted his hand and I gasped dazed.

He looked up at me and caught my disheveled appearance and grinned.

“Dont move, I’m not done.”

I returned the grin.

“Good Shirou, cause neither am I”

[yesimwriting]

Crossing lines

General Kirigan/the darkling x reader

Summary: This was requested by my friend @vvsdiamond28 who also writes and has a really good kirigan x reader story up right now! The request was basically for a fic in which the reader is out wandering at night and runs into kirigan while he’s in the banya and then they get to talking and some other stuff before he admits to only trusting the reader and giving her his real name. This gets kinda steamy bc of the request and bc the story called for it lol but it’s not full smut bc i decided that it would be better to do that as a part 2 so that i could add some jealousy tension haha

a/n i think im back?? Ive been working on requests a lot and ive really enjoyed writing regularly again. A small side note, after rewatching revenge of the sith im kinda in the mood to try writing an anakin fic 😭 pls he was my OG fictional crush,, so either send help or a request for him or something, Anyways,, back to this fic--ahh i had fun writing it but i still feel awkward writing steamier stuff so be nice!! 

-- 

Those that wander in the night, lost in uneasy thought--there’s probably a lot that can be said about them. But I can’t think of anything to be said about me. Nothing good comes from walking around a place full of powerful and tense people in the middle of the night. It wouldn’t take much effort to interpret my actions as suspicious, and yet I continue forward. I’m an idiot--just because I can’t sleep doesn’t mean I have to wander around campgrounds. My presence is barely tolerated here, I shouldn’t try backstroking in waters I can barely tread. 

But still, I walk, eyes more fixated on the open night sky than anything else. The moon is as full as an overflowing glass, the stars twinkling as if desperate to compete with a light it will never be able to duplicate. I sigh, pressing my lips together. Maybe the stars and I have more in common than I thought. Normally, that would be a good thing. 

Letting out a weary breath, I continue forward, away from the relative safety of the main tents. I’m still on the grounds, I’m approaching the border where the tents of higher ranking officials are. That should make me more nervous, but if anything it almost eases me slightly. 

General Kirigan is not the type to be friendly, and yet our interactions have always been laced with a touch of intimacy I can’t quite explain. We’ve been alone together more and more frequently, and I think that’s how I like him best. It’s strange, but when we’re alone some of his sharpness dulls, leaving space for something I might consider humor or actual personality on anyone else. He probably speaks to many girls like that when they’re alone together--a fact I have to fight to remind myself of--but it’s the closest thing to friendship I have here. Maybe it’s foolish to hold onto that, but I can’t bring myself to release my grip on those sentiments. At least not yet, when the kind moments are still rare and fleeting and no line has been crossed. 

The danger, however, comes from the prospect of not recognizing lines before they’re crossed. Even now, as I walk aimlessly in the night, pacing in hopes of exhausting my thoughts, I’m crossing lines in a much more literal way and even these are ill defined. I must be in new territory now, and even that I can only vaguely recognize because of the strangely humid scent that surrounds this area of the grounds. 

I’m near the banya. I didn’t intend to wander here, but the thought of splashing water on my face is too tempting to pass up on. I move closer, finding a sense of peace in having some direction, even in a small way. 

When the promise of water is only steps away, I begin to regret everything. There’s a figure in the bath. I freeze, ready to attempt to shrink away in hopes of disappearing before I’m caught. This could easily turn extremely awkward even though I technically haven’t done anything. Most people don’t bathe at this hour. Who bathes this late at night? 

I keep my eyes on the individual, trying to make out who they are and how aware they are of their surroundings in the dim light. Pale skin, dark hair--unbelievably attractive torso. My eyes linger there longer than they should. I force my gaze upwards, towards their face as if that can erase my ogling. Embarrassment leaves my face burning--I’m not the ‘ogling’ type, and this person doesn’t even know I’m here. I keep my eyes on them as I step back, taking in unaware features as best I can in the dark. 

I know them--I--Saints, it’s Kirigan. 

Fantastic. Of course he has to be even more impossibly attractive while shirtless and wet. I turn my head upwards sharply, more desperate to not be caught than ever. I would never, ever recover from being caught. Whether he’d tease me or be angry with me, I don’t know. I also don’t know which option I’d prefer. 

I step back again, my gait wider due to my urgency. Snap. The sound of both a twig and my chance of a stealthy escape being shattered. I cringe, craning my neck to the left in a desperate attempt to make it clear that I wasn’t watching him. I take another desperate step, ready to duck behind a nearby tree. Maybe he hasn’t seen me--maybe he’s distracted and assumed that some kind of rabbit or something passed by. He may not actively dislike me, but I’m not sure any semblance of favor he may have for me extends to this situation.

“Y/n.” His tone reveals nothing but his level of certainty. Ignoring him will only make me seem guilty. 

I pause, keeping my gaze off of him. “Yes.” It wasn’t really a question, and yet I still answer it like one. “I was--I couldn’t sleep so I thought I’d get some air, and I was walking kind of aimlessly and I ended up here and I didn’t think anyone would be here.” Why do I feel like I’m making this situation worse? “I’m sorry--I’m gonna--I’m going to go now.” This is the kind of embarrassing moment that will come back to me when I’m trying to fall asleep at night. I know it.

“You know the polite thing to do after intruding is to make eye contact.” 

I don’t think my face has ever felt this warm before. At least he doesn’t sound angry, but his voice doesn’t reveal that much. I raise my gaze carefully, turning my head slowly. “I didn’t mean,” I exhale slowly, “It wasn’t my intention to intrude.” 

He straightens slightly at my words, exposing more of his chest. I stay still, eyes trained on his to avoid an accidental lapse. “You could make it up to me by offering conversation.” Kirigan’s tone is deliberate, his words measured and calm. I don’t speak, feeling like I’m being presented a test I don’t understand, but most of our conversations leave me feeling like that. “Only if you’re comfortable.” 

And just like that, I’m backed into a corner. A challenge. To deny him now would be to expose the effect he has on me. My chin raises a fraction of an inch as I take in that assured half-smirk. “Why wouldn’t I be comfortable?” 

Kirigan arches a dark brow, assessing my response. “Then sit,” his voice has not changed, “You want air and I want company.” 

I don’t think anyone that looks as good as he does shirtless has ever had trouble finding company, especially with the smooth way he speaks. Despite this, I step forward to accept his challenge without calling him out on his coyness. Each step is the crossing of another invisible line until I’m near the water’s edge. I make sure to keep my nightgown at a respectable length as I sit down. 

I make a point of extending my legs towards the water while leaning back so that I can’t be easily accused of being a coward. “I feel the need to warn you that I might not make particularly interesting company.”

He angles his head to the side slightly, drawing attention to his jawline and neck. I force my stare to focus on the water. “I’ve never found you uninteresting.” 

There’s something resigned in the way he says this. On instinct, I look up, taking in the slight softening of his features. The release of his usual sternness only adds to his beauty, a fact that I’m already resenting. 

“You may be the only one.” It’s not meant to be a deprecating comment, but I’m not sure my partial laugh softens my bitterness. I hope it does--I’d rather his interest than the interest of my entire unit. 

Kirigan shifts forward, the water moving with him. “Do you think that any coldness you’re experiencing has to do with you?” 

The question has me drawing my eyebrows together. What else could it be? I shrug, “I’ve considered it.” 

He nods once, eyes hardening slightly. “Do you always have trouble sleeping?” 

The personalness of the question shouldn’t surprise me as much as it does. Kirigan seems to only understand boundaries when he’s the one setting them. “Not really.” A partial lie--this time I’m glad I can’t quite bring myself to look at him. “It’s not uncommon for me, but it’s not something I deal with every night.” 

I risk shifting my eyeline when I hear the sound of water moving. Kirigan’s now resting an arm on the rim of the pool, wet skin dangerously close to my ankle and lower calf. “It’s not always easy,” his voice is low now, “Being alone with your thoughts.” 

That’s not the kind of reply I’d expect from him. I blink twice before turning to study his expression. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him seem so tired--so weary and human and in need of something. The line between his eyebrows and the far off quality of his eyes leave me with the strong desire to give whatever it is he needs to him. The urge to reach out, to touch him in hopes of breaking him free from his odd trance leaves my stomach knotted. That line is too clear to cross so recklessly.

I need to chase away the serious atmosphere he’s created. “Is that why you bathe so late at night?” I let myself smile, “To avoid thoughts?” 

“I like the peace of it.” Something akin to amusement touches his words. “And for the record, little dove,” the nickname is pointed and earns him an eyeroll, “The warm water doesn’t exactly chase away thoughts so much as encourages others.” He pauses. “You understand, considering you can barely look at me.”

This is the most embarrassing thing to have ever happened. The suggestive jilt to his words has to be intentional. Damn him. I turn my head, forcing myself to meet his gaze. “I can look at you just fine.” 

“And if I were a Heartrender and could hear your heartbeat your pulse would be normal?” The question is teasing, a small smile pulling at his lips. 

The warmth in my face increases, spreading down my neck. Kirigan’s expression remains smug. “You’re not as funny as you think you are.” 

“No?” He leans forward, angling his head so close to me I can faintly feel the warmth of his breath on my lower calf. “I find myself amusing.” 

At least being around him like this is getting easier. I open my mouth, ready to provide some sarcastic comment I haven’t thought out yet. My mouth clamps shut on instinct when I feel his touch on my ankle. The faint contact quickly grows, his fingers brushing up my ankle and calf, leaving drops of cool water across my skin.

“What are you doing?” That’s a--a fair question, right? I’m not sure, rational thought slipping from me more and more with each passing second. 

“Nothing, really,” his reply is quick. “Nervous?” 

There is no way he doesn’t know what he’s doing. I roll my eyes, fighting against my instinctual fluster. “No,” a full lie, “You’re just getting me wet.” 

“Barely.” When he’s not busy being brooding he’s not much better than an irritating child. He retracts his hand slowly, fingers grazing my skin slowly as he submerges his hand beneath the water. The loss of contact should feel like a victory. It doesn’t. “Y/n,” he shifts closer, back straightening.

There’s an odd seriousness to his demeanor that almost leaves me reeling. “Yes?” 

He beckons me forward. I hesitate, but comply, letting myself shift closer to the water’s edge. Kirgan’s lips part, but no words leave him before he moves his arm, purposefully splashing water over my thighs and bottom of my nightgown. I let out an instinctively annoyed sound. “That is getting you wet.” 

“Kirigan!” My tone is as menacing as I can make it, but he continues to grin. There’s such a lightness to the look I almost forget to be annoyed. Almost. “I should tell the entire Second Army how much of a child you are.” 

My threat does nothing, his smile softening without fading. “They fear me too much for your stories to make a difference.” He says this flatly. “All of them except you.” 

I don’t know if I’m supposed to make something of that comment. A brief moment passes in which I think his eyes come close to softening. Maybe that’s a side effect of seeing the world as you want. Wait...what do I want? Him? No, no, I can’t. 

Okay, he’s objectively attractive and sometimes I think I may see more depth in him than he wants to be capable of. But that doesn’t mean I’m allowed to want anything with him. Even if he was trustworthy enough for me to be with him in any capacity...even casually, it could never happen. Nothing good could come from having relations with the highest ranked general and I doubt he’d ever want me like that. He likes to fluster people and I’m an easy target. I just accept it because being some level of entertainment to him is better than being nothing to everyone. 

“I don’t think there’s much point in fear.” It feels like a fair answer. The fairest answer I can manage, anyways. 

He sighs, the sound heavy. His hand stretches forward cautiously. I watch him and make no attempt to stop him from touching my lower calf. His fingers trace absentmindedly across the skin. “Of course you’d think that.” 

Again, I don’t know what to make of his words. Or his actions. He couldn’t find anything wrong with me just slightly adjusting my position. It’d be a polite way to remind us both of the natural order of things. But then again, someone like him is allowed to be mad about anything. And I’m not sure I want to remind us of our place. 

Actually, I’m completely sure that I want the opposite of that. But admitting that to myself is enough of a risk. I’ve already crossed thousands of tiny lines and what I want will require us to cross a thousand more. 

“I’m a little surprised you’re not reminding me how foolish a notion like that can be.” 

He lets out a tiny breath as he shifts even closer to me. “Maybe I’m enjoying your foolishness.” 

“I’m not sure if I should take that as a compliment or the opposite.” 

The slightest hint of a smile is visible to me beneath the moon’s glow. There’s something about darkness that adds beauty to things. I wait for him to reply, but instead of speaking his  hand moves further up my leg. I struggle to hide my reaction to his long fingers trailing up my skin.

He’s touched me before, sure. Tiny moments in which he’d push a strand of hair out of my face or wipe at a bit of dirt on my cheekbone. More recently, he had gripped my hip firmly to guide me through a crowd of soldiers. He had been in a hurry, stealing me from a conversation with the only member of my unit that’s been somewhat friendly to me. It wasn’t serious--he had just been rushing me because he only had a minute between meetings and apparently he had too long of a day to not take a moment to speak with me. 

“Are you alright, Dovey?” Normally, the nickname and all of its variations earns him an eyeroll. But everything is a lot less humorous with his hand half up my lower leg, leaving a trail of cool water wherever he touches. 

His fingers press more firmly into my skin. “Yes, I’m fine--it’s just late.” 

“Hm…” Kirigan breathes before tilting his head slightly. “You’re warm.” I stay silent as his hand shifts slightly. “Perhaps too warm.” 

If I’m hot that has absolutely nothing to do with fever. “I’m fine, General, I promise.” 

“Come closer,” he says, “It’ll take me no time to check.” 

...A little too convenient. My nightgown is still embarrassingly damp from the last time I eased tonight. “Please tell me you don’t find me that naive.” 

“Naive? No.” He lifts his hand slightly. “Warm? Yes.” I still don’t trust him. “I’m not going to do anything. I promise.” 

His eyes are dark and the limited lighting of the moon doesn’t offer me much in my analysis, but what I can see makes him seem genuine. “Why do I feel like that’s not the first time you’ve had to say that?” Despite my comment, I move towards him. 

The back of Kirigan’s palm is pressed to my forehead for less than a second. He brushes his hand down the side of my temple, rotating his wrist so that his fingertips can touch my cheek. His hand then continues to move down my jawline and then my neck...and then finally trails down my collarbone. I bite my tongue to avoid exhaling audibly at the contact. 

“Warm,” he concludes with a tsk, and yet he doesn’t withdraw his hand. “Though that could just have to do with the climate.” His thumb slips beneath the sleeve of my nightgown. “Perhaps you could benefit from joining me.” 

I bite my tongue to avoid letting out a surprised, embarrassingly enthusiastic squeak. I don’t know what’s gotten into him...maybe it’s the night air and the prospect of being fully alone. I should be strong enough to break whatever spell he’s starting to place on me. But I’m not. I’m really, really not. 

He pulls on the sleeve of my nightgown slightly. “I’m…” 

“Unless you’re nervous?” Another damn challenge. To shy away from this would be to expose myself. He tugs on the sleeve a little more assuredly, exposing my shoulder to the humid night. “Do I make you nervous?” 

His voice comes out a shallow rasp. I feel it straight in my core. “...Not more than you should.” 

“More than I should?” 

Ugh--too honest. I let myself get distracted. It shouldn’t be too difficult to explain what I meant. He knows he’s feared. He wants to be feared. “I’m sure we’re both aware that there are a fair amount of cautionary tales revolving around you.” 

His hand falls next to my lap. Oh? I didn’t expect to miss the contact between us so much. His expression seems to have fallen slightly as well. Was it my response to his question? It felt fair and straightforward without being too blunt. “And you believe every cautionary tale you hear?” 

There’s something stiff about the way he asks the question. His moodiness is making me miss his touchiness even more. At least then I didn’t have to feel like I made a mistake. Did I say something wrong? “Should I?”

“It depends on whether or not you plan on being brave.” 

“I told you...I don’t see much point in fear.” 

“And yet you’re still there.” A bit of humor returns to his voice. “Why is that?” 

Rolling my eyes, I shift forward, letting my legs dip into the water. This is as far as I should let this go. I’ve already lost too much more control. “Better?” He’s strangely tense again, a hint of something bitter playing at the smug look he tries for. “You alright?”

“Of course you’d ask me that.” He says this with a tired sigh. “You can never make things easy.” 

“I don’t understand.” 

He shifts backwards slightly. I can feel the distance between us like I’d feel a pebble in my shoe. “Do you believe all the stories about me?” 

Is he still bothered by that? “I didn’t mean it as literally as you’re taking it. All I meant is that people are intimidated by you, but that’s not a bad thing. It’s the way things have to be, you’re the only Shadow Summoner in existence and the army needs you to be intimidating so that they can act on your guidance.”

“The way things have to be,” he echoes, his voice strangely weighted. “There’s a specific kind of loneliness that comes with being feared by everyone.” 

Oh--I don’t know what I expected, but it wasn’t that. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him feel defeated like that. I reach for his hand without thinking, pulling his fingers towards my lap. “I don’t--I’m not scared of you.” It’s a weak attempt to comfort him, but it’s the only one I can think of. “That probably doesn’t mean anything, but I--” 

His hand turns in my lap, squeezing the exposed part of my thigh. “It means something.” Kirigan’s voice has hardened in a different way. “You’re the only person I’m certain of.” 

Everything in me seems to tighten at that. At the implication of something so personal from someone so closed off. “Kirigan, you don’t have to be as alone as you feel. You talk to me all the time and you do so in a way that makes it easy to forget the cautionary tales.” His hand moves further up my thigh. I fight as I try to remember our usual dynamic. “You’re the only one that talks to me like that.” 

“Have you ever considered that maybe the others refuse to take to you because of the favor I’ve shown you? The instinct to stay away from me is strong enough to extend to those around me.” Kirigan’s hand moves higher up my thigh. “To be near me is to involve solitude.” 

“I don’t care.” The answer leaves me too quickly. “Being near you is worth it.” 

He leans closer before resting his chin on my knee with no hesitation. “Careful, you don’t understand the line you tread.” Kirigan places his hand more firmly between my thighs. “Or perhaps you do...perhaps you know what you want to cross.” 

This time I can’t help the airy sigh that leaves me. Kirigan pushes against my thigh slightly, separating my legs. I feel his breath on my inner thigh before I know what’s going on. I can’t move, I can’t think, I can’t even breathe. That inability to do anything but feel my heart pound against my chest only worsens as I feel his lips press into the inside of my thigh. His lips trail up my skin before his teeth gently sink into the top of my thigh. 

“Is the line you want to cross?” He breathes the question so softly I feel like I’m being coddled. Everything in me feels too hot to think of any kind of coherent response. Kirigan uses his free hand to pull the fabric of my nightgown as high up my thighs as he can from his position below me. “Or maybe this is the line you want to cross?” Kirigan pulls me forward so suddenly I let out a tiny gasp. I’m not fully on the edge of the banya. “Or perhaps this one?” He kisses the skin of my inner thigh gently. Each time I exhale too loudly, his teeth graze my skin. He gets harsher with each passing second. “Lay down.” 

My body listens to him on instinct. How is this happening? How am I this powerless to fight against something that’s so clearly wrong? The sound of water shifting causes my entire body to tense. He’s pulled himself out of the water. Kirigan moves above me instantly, water dripping from his toned chest and dark hair and onto my still damp nightgown. 

Before I can speak, he’s on me completely, his lips pressing against my jaw. He kisses down my neck, his teeth grazing against my skin sporadically. He pulls away from me by tracing his tongue across my collar bone. I let out something dangerously close to a moan. “Such pretty, little sounds.” 

“Kirigan--” 

“The only name I want you to hear from your lips is the only name that I’ve not given myself. The only name that holds meaning to me.” 

His lips graze where my skin meets the hem of my now soaked through nightgown. I’m not sure the poor lighting is offering me enough coverage now. There’s no way the thin fabric leaves much to the imagination while being this wet. He kisses up my chest and neck until his lips reach the shell of my ear. 

“Aleksander.” The name is grace in the form of a breath so soft it’s more like I’m feeling the name than actually hearing it. 

He presses his lips against the spot on my neck directly beneath my ear. I exhale into the contact. “Aleksander.” As I test his true name on my tongue, his teeth dig into my skin much more harshly than before. 

I let out a partial squeak at the sudden shift in pace as his hands grip my waist. “Say it again. Say my name again.”

He traces his tongue gingerly over the skin he just aggravated with his teeth before I can speak. The soothing sensation is so much I can barely find my voice. “Aleksander.” 

His hand bunches the bottom of my nightgown, raising the fabric to my hips. “...Say it just like that.” Kirgan’s rough hand slips between the bone of my hip and the fabric of my hip. “Like I’m the only one that knows you like this.”

“Aleksander.” I breathe as he traces invisible patterns into my skin with his lips. “Aleksander.” Each use of his name earns me extra attention--a stronger hold on my hip, a more adamant nip at the base of my neck. I feel my need for him so heavily I swear it’s leaked into my bones. “Aleksander.”

When he pulls away, I fight the urge to whine. The night is still humid, but with the absence of his touch I feel like I’m shivering. He regards me silently for a long moment before shifting his weight again. I feel my heart stall in my chest as his hand softly brushes a strand of hair out of my face. He lets his hand linger there, at the apple of my cheek. The entire world seems to stall as he leans down, his hand cupping the side of my face as his mouth inches closer to mine. 

“I can feel the fluttering of your heart.” 

Any poor defense dies in my throat as his lips meet mine. He gives me no time to think about what’s happening as he presses into me even harder. Kirigan holds my face as his teeth graze against my bottom lip. My mouth opens slightly in surprise, giving him the opportunity he needs to slip his tongue into my mouth. His tongue slowly brushes against mine, coaxing me into total, delirious, compliance. When he starts to pull away, I react, my hands flying forward to grab his hair. He lets me get away with tugging him towards me, prolonging the kiss as he bites my bottom lip. 

One of his hands leaves my face and travels up the hands holding onto his hair. He pulls me off of him easily, pinning both of my wrists above my head with one hand. “Easy,” Kirigan warns, “You’ve been such a good girl, let’s not ruin it before we’ve started.” 

A tiny sigh leaves me. I can feel the pride he takes in that as his hand trails further down my body. His fingers ghost along the hem of my underwear teasingly. 

“Is someone there?” I’ve never damned the voice of a stranger more. 

Panic and dread roll in my stomach. I’m going to get caught like this, with my nightgown bunched at my hips beneath the General Kirigan. An unclothed, wet, General Kirigan. “I’m bathing.” 

Okay...good...Aleksander spoke. Anyone with common sense would run at the thought of invading on Kirgan’s privacy. It’s a good thing that the soldier had the sense to linger behind a thicket of bushes. “Pardon General, but there’s been a crucial development. A new strategy should be thought of as soon as possible.” 

No. No. The thought of losing contact so entirely, of having a moment that should have never happened be ripped from me before it’s even really happened is overwhelming. I feel my lips pull into a pout. Kirigan’s hand adjusts on me, his thumb pressing teasingly over where I’m neediest. I bite my tongue to avoid making an inappropriate noise. 

“Five minutes--I’ll be in the strategy tent in five minutes.” 

“I’ll tell the others, General.”

Great. I hear the stranger disappear, his feet crushing twigs and grass as he leaves us. Aleksander’s attention returns to me quickly. Disappointment swells in my chest as I take in the solemn look that crosses his features. His hand moves to my chin quickly before pulling me into another deep kiss. It’s too short lived. 

“I have to go.” 

Frowning, I lift my hand to trace my fingers up his arm. It’s softer than I should allow myself to be, but it doesn’t really matter anymore. Not when this is probably never going to happen again. “Do you?” I mumble to myself, half joking.

He sighs once, his thumb brushing against my cheek. “No pouting.” 

Now that whatever little bubble we were in has popped, I’m capable of normal feelings. Including shame. “I am n--” 

“Easy, little dove, I’ll remember all of this when I find you again.” 

This...this is going to happen again? “You’re going to find me?” 

“I haven’t yet heard your voice crack on my name as I undo you.” He punctuates the promise with a kiss to my jaw. “Again.” Another kiss. “And again.” Another brush of his lips as he finally pulls away. “And again.” 

My breath catches itself in my throat as he moves off of me entirely. Damn whatever change in the war that’s pulled him away from me so suddenly. I sit up as he stands. I’m not sure where to look now that he’s not in close enough proximity to cloud my thoughts. I should leave as he dresses, but I can’t quite bring myself to. It doesn’t feel safe, not when the man that interrupted us could reappear at any moment. Not when I want to hold onto his presence like this as long as possible. 

 He squeezes my shoulder warmly as he passes before bending down to press one more kiss next to where his hand is. 

“Soon,” he promises again. 

--

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