#ive been itching to trust

[ohsweetflips]

my neutral dragon age trait is that 50% of the time i'm like "the more i critique the games, the more i love them. i can appreciate each game for what they are but my criticism and frustration over what they could be are a sign of love" and the other 50% is like "this is the writing of the dragon age series. sure. why not. this may as well happen."

[bayonetta-origins]

twitter liked them so ill share here too^_^ my aurametis hcs.....

[om340700]

already have a bday thing ready for mammon orz

[prosebushpatch]

new otp is Gaius and Evelyn from Rune Factory 3. like, i'm sorry, he has a hard time expressing his feelings because she assumes every gift he gives her is a commission to turn it into an outfit? And she, the resident fashion designer who uses fish and fondue for her out-there fashions seems to relish the challenges he gives her? But when he gives her an engagement ring, one he made as a blacksmith meant to suit her perfectly, she considers this the hardest commission he's presented her with yet and after asking you to suss out the kind of girl he likes, SHE DECIDES TO WEAR THE RING AND WALK SIDE BY SIDE WITH HIM AS HER GREATEST ATTEMPT AT COORDINATION YET. HELLO?

[biteyoubiteme]

lucky charm teaser

choi beomgyu x fem!reader ⁷⁷⁷ㅤ

⚂ ⚃ synopsis: On impulse, you book a hotel room at one of the largest resorts and casinos on the Las Vegas strip. The same hotel where beomgyu had been living for five years gambling night after night waiting for a winning streak that he found the very first day he had walked through the side door. Without knowing each other you bet on the same slot machine promising to split whatever prize it is that you end up with. Only the night never ends and no one can stop the two of you from chasing every high you could get your hands on. ⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝ warnings: early 2000's au, gambling addiction, shopping addiction, violence, impulsivity/reckless behavior, smut, more to be added/subject to change/full warnings to be posted with fic

estimated word count: ~20k I could be lying I don't know how to estimate word counts so we will actually see how far off I am or just right when it’s posted lol

⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝ release date: 2025

an: it the month of beomgyu and I cannot get him off my mind- ive been spending so much time researching this fic and I love it sm it’s my baby rn so hopefully you enjoy it when the time comes :)) [m.list]

⸝⸝⸝

“I'll split it, whatever it is we get, promise,” he lifted his pinky like a kid on the playground, the digit the righter of all wrongs and the promise of all things great, at least to someone sitting in the basement of a hotel. Giving you back at least your two dollars would fix his transgression on your luck. And he had put his own last two into it before trying to add in yours; it was only fair. 

“You have a deal,” it didn't even bother you, two dollars was less than you paid to wash the laundry and you knew that even if he split the twenty sitting in the machine you would have won more than you had expected to so soon. You locked pinkies with him, his thumb hiking up pressing your knuckles together like a fist bump. “Stamp it to make it real,” it felt silly pressing your fingerprint to his, imagining you could feel the soft groves of his life like a fortune ready to be told on an open palm. But you did it anyway, trusting the stranger you didn't even catch the name of. 

Beomgyu handed you the last quarter to make the dollar, you slipped it into the machine and he nodded at the handle still there even when the new wave machines with the buttons were making their way onto every casino on the strip. You felt your hand itch to touch it, pull it, and watch the dials spin just as you had in the commercial that brought you here. Stretching your palm you watched the stranger break into a smile, the luck already funneling back into you at one single action before you pulled the lever. 

The room had never been so loud. Beomgyu could only hear the blood rushing in his ears the second he had seen the second seven line up with the first, body cold all over as he instinctively reached out for anything to feel grounded again. You twisted your fingers in his, watching the way the fruits, bells, and little bars went round and round the sevens sticking out and catching your attention when the first two dials froze in place. You knew even with those two it would be more than twenty dollars the both of you went away with. But then the world began to slow just as the ticking began to dwindle, the tick…tick making the both of you catch your breath before the echoing alarm rang out and bounced off the cement walls. 

“Holy shit-” he had whispered the words, his smile breaking out to show all teeth and gums, his laugh a mix of exhaled adrenaline and the glorious high of hitting the one jackpot he had never seen coming. He let go of your hand for all of a second, reaching out to run his fingers through his shaggy hair, pulling at the roots as he cheered. “We won! We fucking won!” 

You were in a state of absolute shock, blinking from the screaming machine to the elated boy next to you grabbing your hand again to kiss your knuckles like they had been the key to tipping the last number into place. The screen did not read $20 anymore but a crisp 12k, the zeros lined up just as nearly as the triple seven the two of you had rolled on a triple multiplier roll. “We won-” It felt unreal, your laugh bubbling up out of you in disbelief as the tsunami of reality came crashing down on you. 

⸝⸝⸝

taglist 🏷: want to be added to the taglist? check out my rules to see how to join! want to be taken off the taglist? send an ask! everyone on my txt taglist will already be tagged

[heartbreakgrill]

happen: sleep token (vessel).

a/n: we pretend we don’t see my unfinished fics, okay? also we pretend we don’t see my spelling and grammar and plot mistakes in this, okay? okay. enjoy :)

"your paint is smeared."

vessel looked up from his piano, first meeting my eyes, then following where my finger pointed to.

"shit," his accent stuck out like a sore thumb, elongating the i in the cuss word.

vessel wiped a finger across the paint in an attempt to blend it in. it didn't do much.

"i think you might be making it worse," i commented with a smug smile.

vessel met my sneering gaze. he was unphased by the sarcasm on my tongue. he reached a blackened hand forward as he tried to rip the clipboard from my hands. i ducked out of his reach. the piano blocked him from me, but his arms were long enough that he managed to swipe a hand across my stack of papers.

i scoffed, stepping back a few feet, examining the black paint overtop my paperwork. "vess!"

"y/n!" he mocked my tone. he rounded the piano, coming to look down at the paper in my hands. "your paint is smeared, lovey."

i looked at up with an annoyed stare, "fuck off."

vess patted my bare shoulder, sending electrically shocked goosebumps down my clammy skin. i shifted my arms, hoping he wouldn't notice how i shivered under his touch.

"i'll go get some more paint, kay?" i offered with a deep breath.

vessel settled in front of his piano again. he nodded, pressing a few keys, "there's a tube in my dressing room."

"be right back."

i turned on my heel and headed for the stairs. i passed ii, who patted my head, and iv, who made some chirp about me owing him a shot- which just wasn't true.

i reached the dressing room soon enough. i'd been in here- in the other ones- numerous times. we often all hung out as a group between shows, in here or out on the town with various disguises on the boys. i still didn’t know who the guys were outside of those masks and strange nicknames. sam did, of course, because he’d been teching for the boys for years now. plus, they all had a brotherly relationship. they trust him.

for some reason, going in here by myself felt provocative. i kept my vision tunnelled, just in case they left something important out. they were men, after all-messy, sometimes careless, forgetful.

outside clothes, hoodies and sweatpants i recognized, sat strewn across the chairs and couches. their personal cellphones were sat with their things, different from the work phones they had been assigned. i had their work numbers, for professional conversations, for getting bullied by ii and iv in the groupchat. vessel and i talked, sometimes, about new coffee shops in new towns we'd be stopping by, movies we'd need to go see when we had a day off.

personal phone numbers were for the trusted.

i b-lined for vessel's paint and brushes, on the counter beside his phone. as i did, my eyes glossed over a wallet. it wasn’t one that i recognized. but, i knew that it was vessel's. or, whoever he really was. my fingers itched with a curiosity that i could not feed. it was none of my business who they were. if they wanted me to know, they'd tell me. they'd unmask themselves when we're chilling out on the tour bus.

if vessel trusted me, if he felt our silly conversations held any depth like i thought they did, he'd tell me who he was.

no matter that i'd known him for six months and hehad yet to do so. no matter that i thought we might have reached that point. no matter that sometimes, when he looked at me, there was a longing sat right behind his eyes, a wanting that made me feel entrusted, that made me feel like he understood what was bleeding off my skin.

no matter.

i grabbed the paint and headed back for the stage. vessel was sitting on the side of it now, talking to ii about something or the other. i handed the paint off to him. i went to go backstage, heel prepared to turn, when he spoke, "thanks, lovey."

ii followed vessel's gaze up to me. i stood overtop of them. ii's eyes raked up my bare legs, over the little black dress i wore. he met my eyes and nodded. "hey, gorgeous."

ii always enjoyed flirting with me. playfully, of course. vessel rolled his eyes at the usual quip. "here we go..."

"i am going to do my job. see ya later!"

ii reached up and grabbed my hand before i could leave. i jerked back to my spot, brows raised. ii shook my arm around, "go on, darling, give us a strut."

"you're ridiculous," i ripped my hand from his, though i chuckled slightly.

"tell her, vess," ii nudged his bandmate's shoulder with his elbow, "tell her how beautiful she is. she just doesn't believe me!"

i met vessel's eyes. he never joined the boys in their teasing, never flirted like ii did. he was always genuine, kind. our conversations were always full of depth, too. in fact, he never showed much interest in me besides those longing, full glances that i took to heart, that i let create a delusional fantasy land in my head. everytime i thought he might be, when we'd have these great conversations, he'd pull back. like was afraid, or he didn't fully trust me.

so, i shuddered when vessel's eyes drug down my body, over my exposed chest, the barely visible tops of my boobs, the curve of my waist, hugged tight by the dress, and the skin of my thighs and calves, right to the tips of my platform boots.

it was then that i realized today was going to be a very different day.

"you look..." vessel rolled his eyes back up my body, to my own flustered gaze, "good."

i couldn't get away fast enough. i thanked them both, stuttering slightly, before turning on my heel and racing towards backstage. i bumped into iv's shoulder and muttered a half-hearted apology.

i knew that they all were staring at me, analyzing my girlish behavior. i knew they'd talk about it.

and that was embarrassing as fuck.

when the show ended, i was determined to not be anywhere near any of the boys. i escaped to the bus sam, myself, and the other techies slept on. i changed into comfortable clothing and lay in my bunk, willing the blush on my cheeks to finally leave me alone.

this wasn’t supposed to happen. did i long for him to say something like that? duh!

did i actually want it to happen? no, bitch.

because that changed everything for me.

i just needed to hide out here for the night, will my anxiety and the fawn look in my eyes away. tomorrow, i could shift everything back to how it was. tomorrow, he’d probably act the same- passive, uninterested.

even if there was any weight to that entire interaction, it’s not like anything could even happen between us.

management made the band swear off girls for risk of privacy and in order to focus on their work. besides, i worked for the band. i helped run every single show they did. they were my boss’.

and there was that whole issue of him not trusting me. because it was so obvious that he didn’t.

i was letting my brain run around too much.

what snapped me back to reality was the commotion of everyone returning to the bus, excited chatter from the other men on the crew filling the once silent vehicle. sam's voice got closer as he and another techie approached their bunks, across and above from my own. i figured they’d just be grabbing something before everyone headed out to the bar.

but, of course- that wasn’t my luck.

"yoohoo," sam knocked a fist on wall, near my head, "is there a y/n in here?"

i huffed, "what do you want?" i knew they were here to berate me to come out with them. but that would mean seeing the boys- having to confront the issue that was vessel.

"get up, grandma," sam teased me for being in bed so soon, "we're going to the bar."

"i'm tired," i replied, a slight groan in my voice. please just go away.

"that's a load of bull," sam scoffed, "you literally said this morning that you wanted to go out tonight."

i went to reply, but more voices filled the bus, all too familiar ones that made my chest tight.

"what's going on? is y/n okay?" that thick british accent burst through whatever i was gonna say next. iv.

then, another spoke- ii, i was pretty certain. "what? what's happening? aren't you coming out, y/n?”

i shoved my head into my pillow, wanting to scream. the only downside of tour was this obvious lack of privacy. i appreciated that my presence was always wanted by just about anyone i worked with. but, god, can’t a girl daydream and regret her actions in peace?

i pulled open the curtains sheltering my bed, just a fraction, not even trying to mask my annoyed expression. ii, iv, and sam were squatted just outside my bunk. sam wore a cheeky grin, but the others had their outside masks on. i could read their energy well, though.

"i'm fine, guys," i waved them all off, cuddled up under my blankets, "i just wanna chill tonight."

"no! you can't! please! you have to go out with us! you promised last time you would! plus you owe me a shot!" iv whined, head tilted to the left. he really needed to find a new gimmick.

i rolled my eyes, "you're a baby."

"wow, y/n," ii set a comforting hand on iv's shoulder, gasping at my insult, "that's harsh. here i thought we were friends."

sam laughed in response, "yeah, y/n. that was really mean. you hurt iv's feelings." he, also, touched iv’s arm.

i met iv's eyes with pursed lips. his eyes read no signs of offense. we were all always so mean to each other and i knew they’d call me out if i ever took it too far. no, this- this was them bullying me back. trying to get me to come out. they’d probably, eventually, get on me about my flustered escape from earlier. ii nudged iv, and he began to fake cry, head dropped down into his hands.

i rolled my eyes again with an exasperated huff, "oh, my god. here we go."

the bus door swung open, then shut again, as the rest of the band made their way in. i didn't notice, too caught up in the boys' theatrics to get nervous that vessel was in my vicinity. he stood just out of sight, watching all of us.

iv sobbed, shoulders rocking. "i can't believe you'd say that, y/n!"

"whatever. im not coming out, freaks,” i went to shut the curtain, but sam pushed it open all the way.

i dropped my head to my pillow in annoyance. ii spoke now, egging on the situation further. i grew nervous he’d bring up earlier, "there's just one thing you can do to make this up to him."

"let me guess, it tastes like vodka and rhymes with hot?" i murmured as i pressed a stressed hand over my eyes.

ii pried my hands from my head. “actually- tastes like hennessy and rhymes with get the fuck out of bed!" he, then, reached into my bunk and tickled my sides.

i laughed this ugly, wheezing laugh, squirming away from ii's reach. iv's showcase of crying twisted into him falling back onto his ass, laughing with his head thrown back. sam held onto the bunk as he joined. i then heard vessel and iii's laughs, echoing from a bit down the hall. i tried to snap myself out of the situation, insecure by vessel's presence. but, ii just wouldn't stop tickling me.

luckily, he did, leaving my face red, tears spilling out of my eyes, and a newfound energy to get up from my bunk. i didn’t forget that vessel was standing there, watching. and, i knew, i’d have to face the reality of my embarrassment eventually. but, the boys drunk were usually pretty sweet.

"alright," i huffed and shoved the covers off of my body, "let's go, you freaks."

"you'll come?" ii offered me his hand, helping me off of the floor.

"yeah, i'll come," i released his hand, steadied on my feet. i shoved his shoulder as i walked towards the closet at the end of the hall. i pushed past sam and iv to get there. as i searched through my bag, trying to find my dress from earlier, i felt eyes still on me. all the boys had begun moving from the bus, going outside to smoke and wait on me. but, vessel was still there. lingering.

he waved at me as i looked down the hall towards him. my face flushed again and i gave an awkward smile. god, i was not helping the situation. if anything, i was making it worse, making him uncomfortable, ruining everything. he’d never trust me now.

i put back on my little black dress, tights to bear the cold, platform boots. my makeup was still in tact, though i had to clean up a few smudges made by my sweat from the show. i finally met everyone outside the bus, drawing eyes to my body as i bounded down the steps.

"still looking sexy, darling," ii flirted, cheekily, taking my hand and forcing me to do a little spin in front of everyone.

as i faced back to everyone, i pulled my hand from his and shoved him away from me again. "creep- let's go. you owe me a shot."

"um, i think it's the other way around," ii scoffed.

i began walking from the group, towards the bar down the street. i tossed a confused look over my shoulder, "that never happened. you're crazy."

i left behind a trail of laughing men, a stunned ii. they teased me- but i did back just as much.

it was just a five minute walk, and i kept my pace ahead of everyone because i was cold and wanted to get there quicker. i knew someone was watching me- again. i knew the feel of that stare. i knew it was vesel. so, i tried to stay just far enough ahead that he couldn't catch up. i don’t think i could keep up any meaningful conversation when my heart was still beating this quickly.

alas, the over 6' man fell in stride beside me, easily, hands shoved in the pockets of an alpha wolf sweatshirt. he adjusted his sunglasses, inhaling a chilly breath before saying, “why’d you run off earlier? before the show? did i- say something wrong?”

"no reason," i snapped a too-quick response, arms crossed over my chest. my cheeks were reddening again.

he tsked his tongue, “good. shame, though, i didn't get to enjoy this dress for as long as i would have liked to.” i couldn’t see his eyes- but i knew they flicked down over my body. i straightened up under the gaze.

what game was he playing?

maybe he just wanted to hook up. i knew it wasn’t anything serious for him, because it couldn’t be.

i could imagine he and the boys were horny. all the time they’d spent declaring celibacy on this tour must be getting to them. so, i convinced myself that’s what this was. but, i of course didn’t want that.

so, i couldn’t help but feel let down that i had gotten my hopes up. i had thought that maybe, just maybe, he wanted me like i wanted him. that, again, maybe, he trusted me like i wanted him to. like i trusted him.

i looked up at him, head tilted back from his height. i tried to read the air between us, hoping something else was there. but i knew he wore a cheeky grin beneath his mask. i frowned, slightly, a desperate disappointment laying just behind my eyes. my head shook just slightly, "don't."

vessel's shoulders fell. he nodded, just once, before silencing himself.

we walked to the bar in drowning silence. i wanted to stop, to turn to him and ask him a million questions. why didn’t he trust me? why didn’t he want me? why couldn’t we try?

why couldn’t we have met in another lifetime, where he didn’t feel the need to hide behind a mask? where he didn’t have to put his life on the line just to reveal himself to me?

not that would fix anything if he didn’t feel what i felt.

i needed a drink.

when we got to the bar, we got swept up in the excitement from our group, separated from each other. i was grateful for the space. it allowed me to breathe, allowed me to start getting wasted.

ii and iv shoved drink after drink into my hands. we pounded shots off of the wooden counter of the bar. we paid far too much for the shitty jukebox in the corner to play our favorite songs. ii even eventually drug me out to the make-shift dance floor, holding my free hand in his, guiding my hips with his other palm.

i clutched onto my vodka cran, following the rhythm ii was swinging in his hips. we danced to some usher song, sultry and silly. normally, i’d shove him away and cuss him out, make fun of him. but, the alcohol was starting to burn my throat, sending a soothingly loose feeling through my blood. i was relaxed.

the song slowed and we did with it. i rested my heavy body against his, chin on his shoulder. we danced in a circle. i could see vessel, sitting at the bar, burning a hole through ii's head with his eyes. he saw me looking at him and quickly looked away.

i just wanted to walk right up to him and kiss him, mask or no mask. i just wanted him. i didn’t care what he looked like. who he was. because i knew him- i knew him well. i knew when his favorite cat died, i knew that he dropped his sandwich in the first grade and cried on drive home. i knew he preferred tea over coffee, with two sugar cubes, and an exact glug of milk in it.

my mind was racing like crazy. i needed to ground myself or i’d do something i’d regret.

that’s when ii mumbled into my ear, “he wants you so badly.”

i jolted out of my own head space, pulling my chin back from ii’s shoulder to look up at him. “what?”

i was having trouble processing words.

“vess. he’s been pining after you for so long,” ii had a sense of urgency in his eyes. "and he think he's trying to see if he can shoot my head off with his eyes right now."

i peered over his shoulder. vessel was watching us again. he didn’t look away, though i knew he could see.

“fat chance,” i blurted out. “he keeps pushing me away…pining my ass. everytime we have, like, a really good conversations about, like, the stars or some shit, the next day he acts like he barely knows my name.”

ii was patient, just listening as i rambled, surely drunk now. i continued on, “i don’t know, dude. like, if he wanted me he would do something about it, yeah? he’d show me. he’d say something. he’d- he’d just do something. instead he just makes me feel crazy.”

i finished myself off with huff. i downed the rest of my drink and set it on a table close to us. both my fists leaned against ii’s shoulders. i was getting dizzy.

ii squeezed my hip in comfort. he waited a moment, for me to catch my breath, to respond. "it's difficult. being in our position. it's hard to tell who's getting close just to catch a peak. forcing everyone we care about to sign mountains of paperwork just to really know us. to trust that we can stay hidden, though the entire world is just itching to unmask us. i know you know that. i know you understand it. that’s part of the reason why we all get along with you so well. the pressures gone. we can be ourselves- no matter what our names are, what we look like. cause you just don’t care.

“i don’t!” i agreed, punching my fist lazily against ii’s shoulder. “i don’t care who you guys are! because you’re still the same to me. and i trust you. and i love you guys. and i just- but just, why can’t he want me?”

he chuckled, “oh, darling. he does. you know he does. and you know the risk, you know the worry. you push it away because it’s not going to be easy. put your pretty little head to rest. just…let it happen as it happens.”

“i think i’m too drunk to really understand this right now, babe,” i droned on, eyes squinted as if i could understand him better with a blurred gaze.

ii tapped my nose sweetly. he stepped back, glancing over to vessel. “just let it.”

i met vessel’s gaze- invisible to me, but so obvious from the burn on my skin. he stood from his seat, hesitant, yet somehow determined.

i felt my body pulled towards him. we met in the middle. some stupid country song was playing. the bad was emptying. our friends were loud. my breath smelled of alcohol. vessel seemed exhausted.

but, for some reason, this was the night that it would happen.

vessel held out a hand, skin pale yet still stained from the paint. i took it. he waited a moment, as if awaiting my consent. then he guided us to the backdoor of the bar. we were out in an alley, alone.

“i’m sorry, lovey,” he said, once he was settled on his heels in front of me.

i clutched his hand like an anchor. “for what?” my brows furrowed.

he brushed a thumb across my knuckles, “that it’s like this. i…i wish i could love you under different circumstances.”

the word passed by without a second thought, so easily spoken from his lips. i barely noticed it. “it’s okay…it’s-its not your fault, vess.”

“no, it’s just,” he ran his other hand overtop his hat, covering his hair just perfectly. “it’s just that i need you to know that. how i feel about you..” now he danced around the word, “because i need you to know that…but…i can’t go forward with any of it. i can’t follow through with it. and i’m so sorry. i just…can’t.”

i slid my hand up to his cheek. he nearly crumbled under my touch. my fingers touched the edge of his sunglasses. he didn’t move. he didn’t try to stop me as i slid the glasses off his nose. i knew those eyes well- i was grateful to see them, even in this dark lighting. i could read him better, i could see his soul.

“i’ll sign whatever you want me to sign.”

the words lingered between us as he processed them. then, he denied them, “lovey…i-“

“i’ll sign a million nda’s. i’ll sign away my life. i’ll- i’ll delete all of my social media. and i’ll wear a mask, too. i’ll step into the darkness with you, vess. i’d do it. i want to do it.”

“lovey, please, i can’t-“

“i can. if you can’t, i can. i can for the both of us.”

vessel dropped his chin, looking away from me. “i can’t ask you to do that for me. beside, you- you don’t even know what i look like. i’m- i’m probably not what you’d want. you can’t love someone you think is ugly. i don’t know, lovey.”

“i do know, vess,” i quickly replied. “i know. i know you. i know your soul. it doesn’t matter to me what you look like, or who you are. cause i know your heart. and that’s all that matters to me. besides, i can’t go on hiding- knowing that we love each other. i just can’t. i won’t allow it.”

vessel met my eyes again. he removed his hand from my own. his hand hung by his thigh, clenching into a fist. it shook. i was worried he’d walk away.

but, after his hesitation softened, he reached his hands up to his face. he tugged the medical mask off of his ears, revealing his familiar lips and smile to me. his nose was new, a feature i’d never seen. but, it was just a nose.

he took off his hat, too, revealing his entire complexion to me. i grinned in response, barely even getting a good luck at him because i really didn’t care.

“that changed nothing for me,” i grasped at his hands. “i feel the same. i feel- the same. maybe better, knowing that you trust me. but- the same. i still want you- i need you, vess…please. i know you need me, too. i’ve always seen it in your eyes. just…take a chance. come out of the darkness…for me. please.”

vessel slid his hands up my arms, slowly, brushing my hair over my shoulders as he passed. his fingertips tickled my neck, the lobes of my ears, until he cupped my cheeks. i leaned into his touch, eyes alight with abounding adoration. he tilted his head down, brilliantly colored eyes boring into my own.

and then he kissed me.

[chaifootsteps]

i honestly feel like speaking of angel dust/vaggie being a toxic temu version of jax/ragatha, i also feel like pilot! angel was closer to how jax is in tadc. as in: a guy whos been there longer then most the rest of the main cast, and possesses certain abilities/advantages in the position they were "born" into when they manifested into a hell they cant ever escape from (as far as they know, and are so used to being there for so long that they dont care when the main character introduces a possible solution out of said hell,) and to entertain/distract themselves, messes with others that they view as beneath them, so they dont have to think about how horrible everything truly is, or risk being hurt by caring about others unjustified pain who are stuck in the same environment as them. theres just a lot in general i miss about pilot! angel dust's personality, sexual persona, reputation in hell, and personal hobbies outside of him being a pornstar that has not translated into the series whatsoever, and i doubt it ever will. i stopped feeling it ever would be when "my cousin and me" canonically became angels first porno he filmed with val. so i hope whenever theres a jax episode, it scratches at least little bit of that itch ive been missing since then. tadc isnt a show where the creator needs to go on twitter and tell you the series will be best enjoyed when all of the episodes are out, because goose trusts her audience to know theyre smart enough pick up on that fact without being told, and that the episodes will speak for themselves in quality when they drop. so heres to hoping! <3

Oh man, you're right! There are a lot of moments when you can kind of feel the ghost of pilot Angel Dust through Jax...that cool, silky confidence and snark with a trace of something deeply painful underneath.

Energy can never die, it just transfers and changes form.

[jokingmisfit]

For Love

Yandere Jeremiah x Reader

Prompt- “This IV itches.”

Prompt- “This medicine makes me feel so out of it.”

Warnings- Kidnapping, Drugging, Mentions of needles (IV), Cuddling, Implied Isolation

After a few weeks you were calmer, or maybe it was the medicine in your system. So much time left with your thoughts and not much else has left you lonely and tired. Despite having nothing to do you were exhausted. Propped up in a padded rocking chair, with a book, attached to an IV. Too bad your brain can’t keep up with the lines in the book because of the drugs.

You wish you could take the needle out, but the last time you made that mistake you were tied to a chair for several days. At this point you don’t want to fight anymore. You just want a bit more. More to do, more stimulation. You chastise yourself for those thoughts; giving in just because you're bored. An under simplification sure, but you were angry. The thought of giving him what he wants was upsetting. 

But, things were getting harder. Whatever he was doing he was doing it right because you wouldn’t be able to ‘fight’ back much longer.

You only realize you were staring at the wall when the door opens.

“Hello, Darling. How are you feeling?” Jeremiah asks calmly. Eyes calculating; evaluating everything you are.

You glare at him lightly. “I feel like I’ve been kidnapped and drugged.” You say bitterly.

He glares back at your words. You knew he hated when you answered like that. You always give that answer and it never ends well. His glare made you feel uneasy because you knew what could follow.

You sigh again, looking down to avoid his gaze. “This IV itches.” You start. “This medicine makes me feel so out of it. And there's absolutely nothing in this room that’s actually interesting. I’m really tired and there is no reason to be because I’ve done nothing. I feel useless. Like I’m rotting…” You quickly explain your thoughts.

“I see.” He responds, simply, stepping closer. 

Jeremiah reaches for your hand. He places his thumb over the spot the IV enters your veins. The light pressure relieves some of the discomfort you’ve been feeling. You kept your eyes on your hand as he watched you. He rose from his position, bent in front of you and looked at the bag over head.

“I’m trying to… understand… how I’m supposed to make you more… comfortable.” He states slowly.

“More comfortable or more willing.” You ask looking up at him.

Jeremiah's lips curled up. You had no idea whether it was to smile or snarl.

“Always so quick.” He said. “Give me a list of things you’d like. I’ll get them for you.” He offers.

“Can you stop whatever,” You pull loosely at the IV. “this is? Please.” You plead.

“No.” He replies. “Not yet.”

“When?” you question.

He laughs. “When you can be trusted, obviously.”

He cups your face with his hand. His thumb rubs your cheek. You watch him carefully. He may act kinder to you, but you’ve seen what he can do. You’ve witnessed his violence; his psychopathy. 

Jeremiah stood abruptly. He offered his hand out to you, and you, hesitantly, took it. He helped you stand on your unstable legs. The both of you moved towards the bed.

The bed was cool and comfortable. Different from the padded chair. After so many hours in one spot changing your position felt nice. You still wanted to argue for more freedom, more movement, but you knew it would only cause you pain. 

His cologne was surprisingly calming. His suit jacket abandoned earlier when he entered making it easier for him to wrap his arms around you. Jeremiah picked up a book of his own and began to read.

You laid in his arms silently for a few minutes. As tired as you were, your boredom held on tighter. As stubborn as you were, your boredom was louder.

You sighed a little before asking. “Can you read it to me?” You felt embarrassed, but you needed more than this.

A smile grows on Jeremiah's face at your question. “Of course, dear.” He responds.

As he reads you feel your eyelids droop. You feel disappointed in yourself, but he’s becoming one of the few things that can hold your interest. One of the few things to bring you comfort. It was twisted, but you were beginning to need him. A terrible fate but one you weren’t going to fight against much longer.

[sapphicflower-ao3]

what are ur personal favorite fics? i can be a bit picky and have a hard time finding fics but i love ur writing and i feel like we might have similar tastes based on that :3

i'm sorry it took me like a week to get to this!! i wanted to compile my faves and write notes for each of them... and i went overboard LOL. but thanks so much omg, i'm flattered that you would trust my taste based on my writing!

these are all bkdk obviously :)

i. 'In Case of Fire' - passengerside

post-canon // complete // 11K // E

an absolute MASTERPIECE!!! this author has become a recent favourite of mine, i love the way they incorporate little details into their work and make the mundane so beautiful.

highly recommend all of their other works, especially 'Pacemaker'! so freaking beautiful and fun and the lead up to the confession was a genuine holding-my-breath moment

ii. 'Sun Hands' - yesthisisnarumi

snowboarding AU // complete // 5K // T

i've re-read this one so many times it's SOOOOO good! so fun and so classically bkdk it's insane. everybody say thank you OP for giving us the rival olympic champions to lovers story we needed

iii. 'all that you ever wanted from me was sweet nothing' - maxisnotokay

UA compliant // complete // 11K // T

i dont usually read a lot of whump but this was brilliant, im a sucker for this specific trope and for LOVE CONFESSIONS YEASS!!! obvi it has a happy ending bc i wouldnt have it any other way. a good length too :)

iv. 'Spinnin' On Our Feet' - sage_and_cinnamon

High School AU // ongoing // 47K // M

UNDERRATED AS FUCK and my favourite ongoing fic right now. i usually dont read jock x nerd AUs but this fic is so brilliantly funny and charming and heartwarming and it blew all my expectations out of the water and then some. i've been following it for ages and it's been on hiatus for a good while, but it updated recently and when i tell you it was the best day of my freaking life...

v. 'In Perfect Rhythm' - chalk

Band AU // complete // 50K // E

yes how surprising, a band AU fic in my faves list. anyway shut up, chalk is literally godlike in their writing and this fic was SO FUN and scratched all the itches. nothing gets me going more than awkwardly endearing izuku n rockstar katsuki

vi. 'Last Days of War' - antisora

Pacific Rim AU // complete // 44K // M

GENUINELY ONE OF HUMANITY'S BEST PIECES OF LITERATURE???? fuck. i never have the proper words for this fic, but it is SO gripping and the worldbuilding is so tight and their relationship development is so good and the CLIMAX OF THIS HAS BEEN MORE EPIC THAN HALF THE BLOCKBUSTERS I'VE SEEN. i beg you to read this even if you have never watched Pacific Rim. or maybe go watch the movie and get EDUCATED and then read this! i'm begging you, dear reader!!

vii. 'Ingenium' - crandberrycrush

Astronauts AU // complete // 85K // E

guys i love sci-fi sorry lol. this one is another brilliant fic. OP put so much blood, sweat and tears into research and it shows, it is just very intelligent and the plot itself is HEART RACING and GUTTING and THRILLING. there's a lot of POVs and it really fleshes it out, tho ofc bkdk is the main thing. happy ending obvi! it is the space/astronaut drama that i love and adore, just BKDKified now!

viii. 'The Magic in a Mirror' - totallyrottentomatoes

Magic/Circus AU // complete // 80K // E

oh how surprising, a totallyrottentomaoes fic in my faves list. anyone who knows me knows that i rec this fic all the time. it's one of my all time favourites, if not my favourite of all time lol, and it's really because of the writing and the imagery and the characterisation and the relationships b/w all the characters. it's all just so well done and MAGICAL. no joke, if i could print and bind a fic into a book, it would be this one. no notes. perfection. caters to my tastes so specifically. i could go on about this fic forever but i'll shut up for now

also highly recommend 'The Distance Between Suns' by this author - it's a high fantasy epic with TIGHT AS FUCK worldbuilding, brilliantly written, the romance is BEAUTIFULLY WRITTEN, the payoffs are amazing, etc... this deserves to be published and revered

ix. 'Battle of the Bands' - roadtripwithlucifer

Band AU // complete // 168K // E

look i know i always rec this fic, i just can't help that it's like my favourite thing ever. roadtripwithlucifer and totallyrottentomatoes my BELOVEDS. the humour in this fic is so fucking yummy and brilliant, the writing is gorgeous in typical roadtrip fashion, the stakes are gripping, the climax is thrilling, the romance n yearning is INTENSE, the sex is hot as hell, the ending is so satisfying, just..... the whole package.

and while you're here, read other roadtripwithlucifer works like 'Nothing Else Fills' if you feel like destroying your heart :) an angsty and beautifully written time-travel-to-save-my-kacchan-gone-wrong war AU fic. i love OP's works but her more recent fics (eg. after battle of the bands) have had some of her best writing. i adore it when you can feel how an author has poured their soul into their work, you can always feel it in a roadtripwithlucifer work and it's just the cherry on top

x. 'Scar Tissue' - Loriqod

canon-compliant // complete // 18K // E

loriqod is another author with a characterisation that i fuck with so hard... this one was so full of that Yearning and Tension that i so vibe with. bonus points to the plots focus on bkdk's scars like yes pls more of that <3

anyway i might make a part 2 some other time, these are just the ones i grabbed from my public bookmarks. i have a lot of private ones and some of them i forgot to make public oops

hope u find smth u enjoy!

[areyoufuckingcrazy]

“Hit Me (Like You Mean It)”

Commander Wolffe xBounty Hunter!Reader

⸻

The cantina on Vradros IV reeked of sweat, desperation, and synth-spice. Which is to say, it smelled exactly like a place Wolffe would pick for a “quiet recon op.”

You leaned against the bar, twirling your drink with one hand, your blaster slung low on your hip like a challenge. You felt him before you saw him—Commander Wolffe moved like a ghost in armor, all steel and unspoken tension.

“You missed our meeting,” he said, voice low and gruff behind that half-scorched vocabulator.

You smirked. “I was busy. Didn’t realize I needed your permission to have a life.”

“You don’t.” He paused. “Just seems like yours always conveniently conflicts with mine.”

You turned, sipping your drink lazily. “Aw. You miss me, Commander?”

Wolffe didn’t flinch, but the corner of his mouth twitched like it wanted to. “You’re a pain in my shebs.”

“And yet,” you drawled, “here you are.”

He looked tired. No—past tired. He looked hollowed out, like someone who’d been running on fumes since the war ended, and no one remembered to tell him he could stop.

You tilted your head. “You sleep at all?”

“Enough.”

“Eat?”

“When I remember.”

“Touch anyone lately?”

That got his attention.

His gaze flicked to yours, sharp and startled—but not offended. Never offended. Not with you.

“That’s a hell of a question.”

You shrugged. “It’s a hell of a galaxy.”

He was quiet for a beat, jaw tight.

Then, out of nowhere, he said, “You gonna hit me, or just keep talking?”

You blinked. “Excuse me?”

“You heard me.” He stepped closer, chest brushing yours. “You’ve been itching for a fight since I walked in.”

“No, you’ve been begging for one.” You looked him up and down. “Why?”

“Maybe I deserve it.”

“Oh, don’t get all martyr on me, Commander.” You narrowed your eyes. “What’s really going on?”

He didn’t answer. Just stared at you, every inch of him coiled and unreadable.

And then he said, almost too quiet: “I just want to feel something.”

Ah.

There it was.

The crack in the armor.

Not in his phrasing—Wolffe would never be that direct—but in the weight behind the words. You’d seen it before. In soldiers who lost brothers. In children who never got hugged enough. In yourself, sometimes, when the nights were long and the stars too loud.

“Fine,” you said, stepping in close. “You wanna get hit?”

He nodded once, stiff.

You swung. Not hard—but enough to snap his head to the side.

The cantina didn’t even blink. No one cared. It was that kind of place.

Wolffe exhaled, slow and shaky. Turned his head back toward you.

And smiled.

A real one. Lopsided. Crooked. Full of pain and something almost like relief.

You grabbed the front of his armor and pulled him down to your level. “Next time you need to be touched, maybe try asking, instead of playing wounded karking bantha.”

He leaned in, voice rough. “Would you say yes?”

You kissed him.

It wasn’t gentle. It wasn’t sweet.

It was raw. Like striking flint to stone.

His hands came to your waist, holding on like he didn’t trust the ground to stay solid. You felt the tremor in him—not fear. Not hesitation. Just need.

You pulled back, just enough to murmur against his mouth: “Touch-starved bastard.”

He looked at you like you’d reached inside him and flipped a switch he forgot existed. “I deserved that punch.”

“You’ll deserve the next one too.”

He smirked. “Looking forward to it.”

⸻

[magnuspanoptes]

do you have any book/media recs? i love your thoughts on jonelias and as a fan of it (and hannigram/hannibal nbc) im having a hard time finding stuff that scratches that itch 😩

waow what a question i certainly do not have letterboxd and book lists titled 'jonelias intertextuality recs'. never done that.

manhunter (1986) and the silence of the lambs (1991) or just read the thomas harris books.

functionally any bluebeared narrative where the supposedly ingénue gothic heroine masters the patriarch of the gothic manor works for jonelias so: jane eyre, charlotte brönte; rebecca, daphne du maurier (which is jane eyre if it was psychological horror); and phantom thread (2017) (which is rebecca if the second mrs de winter slayed)

deathless, catherynne m. valente which is the same dynamic as above and is also a death and the maiden story.

the bloody chamber, the tiger's bride, and the erl-king - all collected in the bloody chamber and other stories, angela carter

duke bluebeard's castle, béla bartók

candyman (1992) which is based on clive barker's the forbidden. je text of all time. like this is it. gothic romance where union with the lover is only possible through annihilation of the self because the violence is the romance.

ravenous (1999) has cannibalism as colonial expansion, which the podcast is also doing at times in its themes of consumption as power. jon and elias could naturally do boyd and ives.

amc interview with the vampire. loustat, hannigram, and jonelias are all the same ship dynamic about the dual gift/curse of being fated together with a really awful blonde man. i think this has some very smart writing re consumption and race wrt louis and lestat's relationship as black and white men/vampires during jim crow, and is also a thoughtful narrative of abuse which is set to end in a reconciliation, so pitching this as jonelias but if they were vampires feels reductive. but it's jonelias if they were vampires. if you've been here long enough you know i don't choose to differentiate between avatarhood and vampirism.

opening of dracula, bram stoker. jonathan harker trapped within dracula's castle is literally what happens to my guy jonathan sims in the podcast. speaking of which. nosferatu (2024) was kind of mid to me and my reading of it leaned more towards a csa narrative, but that can definitely co-exist with a romantic interpretation of orlok and ellen. didn't interest me very much but might work for you.

gone girl, gillian flynn and the 2014 fincher adaptation. jon will be amy in this scenario. you understand.

whiplash (2014). trust me.

rope (1948)

crimson peak (2015)

for a similar dynamic but with themes of incestuous enmeshment, see the winter prince, elizabeth wein and dead ringers (1988)

stoker (2013). this would be more of interest to someone who liked abigail and hannibal's relationship, not will and hannibal per se. but i did say i see teen!jon as abigail.

jonathan strange & mr norrell, susanna clarke is a very odd recommendation because it's not gothic, not horror, and not romance, it's a whimsical period fantasy piece. there's a lot more happening in this book but the two titular characters have a relationship founded on mutual academic respect which goes through bit of a schism because they subscribe to different schools of thought. exactly the kind of nerd shit i enjoy and strange & norrell's friendship is very dear to me, close to how i picture regency jonjonah.

didn't watch all of house of the dragon but daemon and rhaenyra over there came close to capturing how i feel about jon and elias. also incest. but i wouldn't recommend this unless you're already moderately into the a song of ice and fire books.

i've never read the phantom of the opera but given what i know through osmosis it has got to be the same type of thing.

the picture of dorian gray, oscar wilde - everyone says jonah is dorian gray coded but that's not right. jon as the corruptible gothic protagonist is the dorian here with elias assuming the role of both basil and lord henry.

annihilation, jeff vandermeer, nothing in this is jonelias adjacent, it's just really good cosmic horror and what happens to the biologist is what should've also happened to jon.

[captainstressed]

so ive been working on a post-breakup bucktommy fix it for a hot minute and she's almost finished so i wanted to share the first chapter here before i put the entire thing on ao3.

its starts from the 'tommy's bubbling me' scene from 8x07 except its from tommy's pov. its mostly hurt but i swear the comfort is coming!

title: i love you, im sorry. word count: 1341 chapter: 1 of 2/3

Tommy hit backspace, deleting the drafted text he’d written to Evan with a sigh. Dropping his phone beside him on the couch, he reached out to grab the open bottle of beer from the coffee table and took a long swig. It wasn’t far off three in the afternoon but Tommy couldn’t bring himself to particularly care; he’d come off shift within the last hour and wasn’t scheduled back in until the next day, it also wasn’t as though he was planning to have more than one or two. He needed a distraction, something to temporarily cloud his mind that wasn’t Evan. Buck. He’d lost the right to use his given name the day he walked out of his loft.

It had been just over two weeks since the break up; fifteen days if he was counting, which he was. He had ran the conversation over in his mind an infinite number of times since then and each time he hated himself a little bit more.

“Did you just break up with me?”

“Yeah. I guess I did.”

He slammed the bottle back down on the table with more force than necessary. He was a fucking coward. He’d been a coward back when he was at the 118 and he failed to stand up for Hen and Howie against Gerrard; Tommy had been battling his own internal demons but that didn’t excuse his behaviour then and it sure as hell doesn’t now.

He had told Buck that if they ended up moving in together, then the younger man would end up breaking his heart; something that he wasn’t sure he would be able to move on from. The irony of it all was that through his own cowardice actions, Tommy had beat him to it and succeeded in breaking it all by himself.

Bringing his hands up, he pressed the heals of his palms into his eyes. He felt the sting of tears and took a breath, willing them to remain at bay. He had no right to cry, not when this was all his fault. He had broken up with Buck; had panicked at the thought of moving in with him. Not because he didn’t want to, but because when his heart was inevitably broken, the fallout would have been too much for him to fathom.

Tommy wondered if this imaginary scenario would have left him feeling anything like the way he felt right now. His palms were wet, the stars dancing behind his eyes the only outcome of his efforts. Swiping the tears that were only replaced by more a moment later, he wiped his hands across his jean clad thighs and tipped his head back against the back of his couch.

His fingers itched to grab his phone; he wanted to call Buck, apologise for being such a coward, for joining the list of people who had walked away from him and beg him for another chance. It was selfish, he was selfish.

He didn’t deserve Buck; Hadn’t been deserving of being his first relationship since discovering his true identity. Buck had trusted him, had let Tommy in. The two of them shared words and experiences that were completely new to Buck and it made Tommy feel sick that he had taken these things from him, with the promise of protecting them and him only to run when his own insecurities got in the way.

Curling his hand into a fist, he bought it down on the cushion beside him. The movement jostled his phone and lit up his home screen; his background was a picture of an LA sunrise, which to anyone else wouldn’t seem particularly special but to Tommy it held precious memory.

It had been taken a few months prior during one of his early morning runs, by Evan. Tommy had mentioned to him that one of his go to’s for winding down after particularly gruelling shifts was to hit one of the many hiking trails and if he was lucky enough to finish a shift before the day had officially started, then he could sometimes catch the sunrise. It was a way to remind himself that in spite of the often tragic calls he dealt with whilst at work, a new day was just on the horizon and with it the renewal of hope and possibility of brighter times to come.

He’d thought the idea was beautiful and asked if he could accompany Tommy sometime should their shifts lineup. They ended up going one morning after Tommy had finished a forty-eight and Evan was due to start his own a few hours later. They’d found a perfect spot to watch the sunrise and paused their run to drink it in. Evan had taken a picture just as the sun was peaking over the horizon, setting it as his phone background and almost shyly explaining to Tommy that this way whenever he looked at his phone it would remind him of not only the reason behind it but also of Tommy.

It had been one of the many times in which Tommy had wondered how he got so lucky as to find someone as adorable as Evan. He’d even asked him as much, which earned him a blushed smile that Tommy couldn’t help but kiss off his lips. Before asking him to send him a copy of the photo and setting it as his own background too.

Tommy could have changed it in weeks since the break up, probably should have done if he’d had any desire to move on. He wondered if Evan had changed his; selfishly he hoped he hadn’t.

He stared at his phone until the screen went back to black, mulling over his scattered thoughts before picking it up and unlocking it. It reopened back onto his text thread with Evan, they hadn’t spoken to each other via text since Howie’s wedding and the memories of that day and night settled heavily in the pit of his stomach when he compared how he had felt then to how he felt now.

His thumb hovered over the bubble to start a new message; Tommy knew what he wanted to say, what he’d wanted to tell Evan even before they broke up. He had never called his own feelings towards Evan into question, self hatred threatened to bubble to the surface once more when he reminded himself that the only person he had called into question was Evan himself.

Evan who had never been anything but open and honest with Tommy from the start of their relationship. Sure, he’d put his foot in his mouth a few times at the start and sometimes he got a little ahead of himself, but it was one of the many things Tommy loved about him.

Tommy loved him. Loves him.

But he let him go because he’s a coward.

With a sigh, he tapped the bubble to send a new message but paused. After weeks of radio silence Tommy knew it wouldn’t be fair to drops these heavy feelings on Evan straight away. If at all a voice in his head snarked. What if he was too late? What if Tommy ending things had been the wake up call Evan needed to realise that though Tommy had been his first, he didn’t want him to be his last and these last weeks had just helped cement those feelings.

The thought caused him physical pain. His entire reasoning behind breaking up with Evan in the first place had been to shield his heart from inevitable break, but it had quickly become apparent that he was destined for this fate regardless. He couldn’t allow himself to consider that Evan loved him back. He hadn’t deserved it before the break up and he sure as hell didn’t now. The difference now however was that he felt as though he had nothing else to lose, and he owed Evan the truth no matter what the outcome may be.

Fuck it.

“Can we talk?”

Tommy held his breath and hit send.

[cherry-jamm]

heya heya, you wright for the pretty boy homelander right? i saw that requests were opennn and yk ive got loads of little ideas so let me give you one thats been itching my brain for a looooong while

homelander x reader, (pref fem but whatever is fine w me) where r calls homelander 'bunny' out of no where. bc r thinks hes cute (he is) and the nick name sticks so homelander keeps getting called bunny at the most hilarious times.

just a thought, little bitty idea that itches my brain.

--viccy

Bunny

・❥・description: Much to Homelander’s dismay, a very interesting nickname stuck

・❥・word count: .4k

・❥・warnings: employee! Reader, pet names for Homes (obvs), second hand embarrassment

・❥・hi viccy I luv u. Sorry this took so long, I've been in such a slump even small works take forever but everyone's request is getting done, trust 🤞

Homelander stands tall, bouncing on the balls of hid feet. He held his hands behind his back, his lips pressed in a firm line.

"What's got you so anxious?" You smile as you place a hand on his shoulder.

"Nothing." He huffs. "I'm not anxious. I'm the Homelander. I don't get anxious." He sounded more like he was assuring himself.

"Right, so it's not because we’re about to go public on live television?" You raise an eyebrow at your boyfriend. His cheeks are a pinkish color, he exhales loudly.

"I'm fine." He nodded, his hands still behind his back.

"Whatever you say, bunny." You tease him before walking off to make sure everything is set up correctly. You don't get to see how he reacts to the name before you're off.

°•○●○•°°•○●○•°°•○●○•°°•○●○•°°•○●○•°

"Would it kill you to take off that suit?" You frown as you cross your arms. "We're trying to create a chill, casual, look."

"No way in hell am I dressing down for some stream." He scoffs. "I'm the Homelander, not some slob."

"This is a calm Q&A stream, just for the average citizen to learn more about you. You're forgetting I'm on your PR team, I'm helping you. Citizens don't feel like they know you."

"They don't" He cuts you off.

"Make them feel like they do. Just let me rough you up a little bit." He rolls his eyes. "Please bunny." It was a dirty trick but you smiled in satisfaction as his cheeks flushed a dark red that spread to the tips of his ears.

"Whatever." He said, his voice softer than he intended. You stepped up to him to brush his hair out of its clean style. "Just don't call me that on stream." He huffed.

"I wasn't planning on it." You hummed in response and flicked on his camera.

°•○●○•°°•○●○•°°•○●○•°°•○●○•°°•○●○•°

To anyone else the room would feel tense. A row of straight backed employees looked everywhere but the eyes of the superheros in front of them. You slammed the door open two cups of coffee in hand. Technically you weren't late, bit it was common knowledge that all employees should arrive at least five minutes early to greet The Seven. Not like you'd be punished anyways.

"Hey bunny." You said as you placed a cup of coffee in front of Homelander along with a chaste kiss to his temple. You should feel bad for reaping the benefits of dating your boss, but you don't. You walk up to join the line of employees as well. It looked like everyone in the room was staring at you. You heard stifled laughter from Maeve.

"Bunny?" Someone from the table asked

[latetaektalk]

update.

hi there!! its me, linh. and i have an update to give.

it probably surprises no one, but i think its time for me to officially announce that its the end of my time here on tumblr. trust me when i say that i say this with a heavy heart. over the past few months i just realised that ive just kinda outgrown (that sounds so weird to say) writing, tumblr and even kpop in a way.

regarding love to hate you, im so deeply sorry that this how the series is coming to an end, or well... its not. but i really havent felt the desire to touch it at all. or anything for that matter. i will hold that series near and dear to my heart and forever cherish it for how much fun i had creating it. im sorry for leaving it on such a note but i hope you guys can understand and still appreciate the chapters i offered to you guys.

i will keep the blog up, so you guys can go back and read their silly little story again and again. (for those who really really need to know if they make it or not, i will put it in the tags)

and for those few who care, ive been doing really good! im really happier than ever but busier than ever too (uni has been kicking my ass). still, these past few months have been so fun for me and i hope the same applies to you all!!

if you guys want to, you can send me messages because i will still log on every now and then to check up on things. because even though tumblr isnt really a part of my daily routine anymore, i did gain a lot of love for it over the past few years. and hell if the writing itch catches me again, maybe i will post something. its a big maaaybe and right now it looks pretty unrealistic given how busy i am, but never say never i guess

so, it looks like this is a goodbye. but its a good one, a really good one. and i hope you guys understand and see it that way too!!

linh.

[roanofarcc]

PROJECT SUNSHINE CHAPTER SIXTY SEVEN → TICK, TICK, TOCK

summary: steve harrington x oc

when another product of Hawkins National Laboratory escaped a long-survived nightmare alongside her sister, she crashed into one unsuspecting teenage boy and dragged him deeper into the dark mysteries that made up their hometown.

word count. 5.2k || masterlist

warnings: cannon typical violence, child abuse, horror, gore, and depictions of mental illness. parts of this story were written pre-season 4 release. cannon divergence.

previous chapter ← → next chapter

tagged list: @leptitlu, @sattlersquarry, @laughing-drawing-aces, @adaydreamaway30

The infirmary was quiet. None of the other beds were occupied, only the one Seven laid on. An IV was taped to the top of her hand, which itched more than it hurt, and a constant chill drenched her bones. She shivered under the blanket and kept her eyes pointed at the ceiling, listening to the steady beeps of the monitor at her bedside. 

One of the nurses told her to sleep, but despite the fuzziness in her brain, she couldn’t get herself to. 

She refused to even close her eyes until a click sounded from outside the door. Seven faked sleep as the door was pushed open and three steps of footsteps entered. She recognized the voices that followed the steps too. 

“I told you, I don’t know what happened.” The voice came from someone Seven knew from the Rainbow Room. Not a kid, but rather a man who often watched over them from inside the room. He was one of the guards but never wore a weapon on his hip like the others did. Seven thought that made him less scary, but Ivy always reminded her that anyone who worked inside the Lab was never to be trusted. 

Nevertheless, Seven was less frightened of the man, whether she was supposed to be or not. 

“You’re testing my patience,” said Dr. Brenner, sharply. His tone alone caused Seven’s muscles to tense, igniting a fear in her chest, even though he wasn’t even speaking to her. She curled into herself more, quietly so as not to draw any attention or give away that she wasn’t actually asleep. 

“I will ensure there are no serious injuries, Doctor,” the nurse who had been tending to Seven said. 

Dr. Brenner said nothing, but the notable click of his shoes fading told Seven he had left. 

She listened closely as the bed across the room creaked, which she assumed was caused by the man sitting down. He had told her his name once, she thought, but her fever-induced brain couldn’t remember it. 

The man groaned and the nurse didn’t utter a word. The only sounds in the infirmary came from Seven’s monitor and the nurse placing items back down on her metal tray. 

She wasn’t sure how much time passed before the door clicked again and the nurse’s footsteps disappeared. Seven kept her eyes closed and expected the man to remain silent, but his voice filled the air a moment later, startling her. 

“You’re not really asleep,” he said, not posing his words as a question but rather as something he knew. Seven hesitated, keeping her eyes shut. Maybe someone else had entered the room that she had missed, and he wasn’t speaking to her. But then he spoke again. “Seven.” 

Holding her breath, she peeled her eyes open and met the gaze of the man. 

He had a quickly forming black eye and blood was stained across his white shirt. The red caught her eye immediately and she feared the worst, that someone horrible had happened to Ivy or another child. 

As if he read her mind, the man’s lips curled in a small smile, almost amused as he said, “It’s mine.” Seven furrowed her brows, not understanding. “The blood.” He pointed to the stain with a bony finger. “It’s mine. Courtesy of a broken nose.” 

Seven let out a breath before sitting upright. Her head felt heavy on her shoulders, but the nurse had said she would feel better soon. She mentioned something about “side effects,” a word Seven had heard before from various nurses and doctors. 

“Hurts?” she asked, her voice small and timid. 

The man shrugged and flexed his hand, flashing his busted and red knuckles. “It only hurts if you let it.” 

She nodded slowly before another chill took hold of her small frame. She pulled the blanket tighter around her, wishing they’d give her another one. 

The man’s gaze narrowed on her. “And you. Are you here because something hurts?” 

“Sick,” she answered. She was sick, which was different than hurt, or so she had been told. 

“Ah,” he hummed. “Do you know what made you sick?” 

Before she spoke, Seven gathered the words in her head, wanting to ensure she got them right, repeating what the nurse had told her and what she had whispered to Dr. Brenner when she thought Seven wasn’t listening. “The tests made me sick.” That too was confusing. Before sitting still for the test where needles were shoved in her arms and wires were attached to her, Dr. Brenner had promised it wouldn’t hurt and that the tests were good things. 

“Papa said they are supposed to make me stronger.” 

The man’s eyes were sharp and intense, but not as scary as the glare Dr. Brenner, Papa, gave her sometimes. “Do you feel stronger?” 

Seven peered at her hands. A familiar tingle was present in her fingertips, buzzing internally like her veins were shivering. “I don’t know,” she answered. She felt sick; that was all she could feel. 

She expected the man to scold her for not knowing, but when she dared to meet his gaze again, his lips were curled in a smirk. Not a kind one, but not an unkind one either. 

He said simply, “You will.” 

The next morning, Sunshine’s parents returned home to a lie from their daughter and Steve about how the weekend had been super uneventful, followed by another lie that Kali was a new student at Hawkins High who Sunshine had befriended. 

As bad as she felt about it, lying to her parents had become second nature to Sunshine. She kept herself sane by remembering that keeping them in the dark was the best way to keep them safe and left out of whatever darkness was lurking in Hawkins. 

They had yet to learn about the murder of Chrissy, but it was only a matter of time before they read the paper or turned on the news. She had just enough time to come up with some other lie as to why she was certainly in no danger roaming around Hawkins. 

She, Steve, and Kali bit her parents goodbye and headed off to pick up Robin, Max, and Dustin before they spent Steve’s latest paycheck on feed to keep Eddie alive. Steve wasn’t too stoked about it, but they all felt bad for Eddie and no one wanted to risk him leaving his hideout and being questioned by police. If they were going to get to the bottom of what really killed Chrissy and how a “Dark Wizard” from the Upside Down was terrorizing Hawkins, they needed Eddie. And Eddie needed to eat. 

Back at Reefer Rick’s shed, they met up with a wide-eyed and on-edge Eddie, along with Calum who stayed to keep Eddie company and keep him from losing his mind.

“We got good news and bad news,” Dustin prefaced as Steve and Sunshine handed over the bags of food. “Which one do you want first?" 

Eddie dug into the cereal first, filling his mouth before he said, “Bad news first, always.” 

“We tapped into the Hawkins P.D. dispatch with our Cerebro, and they’re definitely looking for you. And they’re pretty convinced you killed Chrissy.” 

“Like one-hundred percent convinced,” Max added, unhelpfully. 

Eddie hugged the box of cereal to his chest. “And the good news?” 

“Your name hasn’t gone public yet,” said Robin. She listened in along with Max and Dustin to the dispatch before they were picked up. “But if we found out about you, it’s only a matter of time before others do too. Once your name’s out there, everyone and their shallow minded mother will be gunning for you.” 

It wasn’t exactly “good” news, but rather news that provided with a short window of time to figure out what was happening before Eddie was hunted by an angry mob of Hoosiers. 

“Hunt the freak, right?” he sighed. 

Robin wince, sympathetically. “Exactly.” 

“So, before that happens,” Dustin said, reeling the conversation back in. “We need to find Venca, kill him, and prove your innocence.” 

“That’s all, Dustin, really?” Annoyance laced Eddie’s tone in an attempt to shield his fear. 

The kid just nodded. “Yeah, that’s about it.” Perhaps his confidence wasn’t the most comforting, but they had been in a similar situation before, so it wasn’t something new for most of them, just for Eddie. 

“Listen,” said Robin. “I know everything’s he saying sounds totally delusional, but we’ve been through this kind of thing before. They’ve been through it a few times, actually, and I have once. Mine was more human fleshed based while theirs was more smoke-related, but the bottom line is, collectively, I really feel like we’ve got this.” 

Beside Sunshine, Steve nodded with his arms crossed casually over his chest. “We are down a couple of key players on our team.” Sunshine’s siblings were clear on the other side of the country, and they hadn’t answered any of her calls that she made that morning. Sunshine told herself they were too busy enjoying their spring break to pick up the phone, without a single inkling that something was very wrong. But the paranoia in her head wasn’t convinced that was the reason. 

“But,” Steve continued, tossing an arm around Sunshine’s shoulders. “We’ve still got our team here, and Sunshine, obviously. And, uh, her sister…” Kali offered the group a curt nod that said she was a willing participant in their team, which Sunshine was grateful for. 

“We sort of in the brainstorming phase right now,” Max said. Mike usually was the best at brainstorming, but he too was in California, so it was left up to those of them left in Hawkins. That pressure already started to push on Sunshine, but the confidence the rest of the group seemed to have, even if it was fake, did help ease her worry just slightly. 

“There’s nothing to worry about,” Dustin said with a reassuring smile tossed at Eddie. As he did so, sirens cut through the air. 

They tossed the tarp over Eddie inside the rowboat before rushing to the windows that looked out toward the road. a parade of police cars was followed by an ambulance, running right past the hideout and heading elsewhere. 

While Sunshine was relived they hadn’t figured out where Eddie was, the cop cars meant something else had gone wrong. If their luck hadn’t changed, that something was probably related to the Upside Down in some way or another. 

Leaving Eddie and Calum to continue lying low, the rest of the group followed the sirens down the backroads until they caught them parked alongside the road right before the trailer park. They barricaded off the road, which was filled with officers milling around. 

Sunshine could see what had happened, but she did spot a familiar face surrounded by three officers, one of which included the new sheriff who took over after Hopper’s death. Nancy noticed them once they all left the car and ignored the rising voices of the officers as she rushed over to them. 

“Are you okay?” Sunshine asked, looking Nancy over for any injuries. The only thing that looked off was the tears in Nancy’s eyes that she seemed to be stubbornly holding back. 

Tugging her denim jacket tighter around her body, Nancy nodded. “I’m fine, but…” she trailed off, glancing over her shoulder as paramedics closed the door of the ambulance. 

“Guys.” Max nodded her head toward the officers who were looking at the group with a heavy gaze. “We should probably talk somewhere else.” 

Since the trailer park was so close, they decided to regroup there. Since the car was already packed with the addition of Kali, Sunshine opted to walk over to the park with Nancy. 

Once everyone was out of sight, aside from Sunshine, Nancy let a few stray tears roll down her cheeks. She tried to wipe them away before Sunshine noticed, but it was too late. 

Wordlessly, Sunshine dug around in her bag- one she had stocked full of an assortment of things ranging from first aid supplies, to lip gloss, to items one may need if kidnapped by Russians or something- and offered Nancy a clean napkin. 

“Thanks.” Nancy blotted her tear eyes and blew her nose as they walked alongside the road. “I-It was Fred.” 

A terrible taste rose from her throat, coating Sunshine’s mouth with dread. “Is he…” 

“Gone,” Nancy croaked. “Dead. He wandered off into the woods and I couldn’t find him. I don’t know what happened. They found him a little bit ago, on the road. I saw his body, Sunshine.” The waiver in Nancy’s voice was all Sunshine needed to know. It was similar to the shake in Eddie’s voice when he recalled the events with Chrissy. The horror. The disbelief. “It was terrible.” 

“We know,” Sunshine sighed. 

Nancy stopped walking, wiping her red nose. “You know? You know what?” 

Sunshine didn’t have to say anything to answer Nancy’s question. She simply looked at her friend with an expression they had carried for years at that point. It told Nancy what she needed to know, what was behind the horrible things happening, again. 

Clenching her jaw, Nancy wiped her eyes one last time before marching over to where the rest of the group waited for them at a picnic table not far from Eddie’s crime scene trailer. 

Taking a seat, Nancy noticed Kali standing and silently observing. “Who’s she?” 

Sunshine briefly explained who Kali was and what she was doing there, and while it looked like Nancy had more questions, Dustin spoke before she could ask them. He quickly laid out what they knew up to that point, with information sprinkled in from the rest of the group where Dustin left gaps. 

Once she was caught up, they needed to figure out their next move. 

“Our working theory is that Vecna attacks under a spell or curse,” Dustin said. “Now, whether or not he’s doing the bidding of the Mind Flayer or just loves killing teens, we don’t know. All we know is that this is something we haven’t encountered before.” 

“This doesn’t make any sense,” said Nancy. “Fred and Chrissy don’t make sense. Why them?” 

“Maybe they were just in the wrong place? I mean, they both were at the basketball game. Maybe that’s something.” 

“And they died near the trailer park,” Max said. 

Vecna having a killing location wasn’t a bad theory. There could have been an unknown or unseen gate nearby, much like the small one Sunshine and Nancy had found in the woods back after Will went missing. That one hadn’t been opened by anyone but the Demogorgon. It was possible whoever Vecna was, he had the ability to open gates, make the kill, and then return to the Upside Down. But Eddie didn’t see anything the night Chrissy died; there were no monsters around. 

“Um.” Steve looked around the quiet park, his shoulders tense. “We’re in the trailer park. Should we not be here?” 

No one had an answer for him. 

“There is something about this place,” said Nancy. “Fred started acting weird the moment we got here. It was like he was scared or upset. He seemed on edge.” 

“Max said Chrissy was upset too,” Dustin recalled. 

“Yeah, but not here. I heard her crying in the bathroom at school.” 

Leaning on her elbows propped up on the table, Robin tossed out her working theory. “Serial killers stalk their prey before they strike, right? Maybe Fred and Chrissy saw this thing before it killed them.” 

“I don’t know about you guys, but if I saw some freaky wizard monster, I would mention it to someone,” said Steve. 

Sunshine hummed in agreement. For anyone who didn’t know monsters really existed, they’d probably assume they were going crazy or losing their mind. They’d go to someone for help, one would hope. Someone who would listen. 

“What if they did?” she said. “Who would be someone both of them could have spoken to about seeing something like that?” 

From across the table, Max’s eyes lit up. “I saw Chrissy leaving Ms. Kelly’s office, the school counselor. If you saw a monster, you wouldn’t go to the police because they’d never believe you. But you might go to your shrink.” 

Sunshine had been assigned to visit Ms. Kelly once a week until she got acquainted with high school. The woman was nice, but she couldn’t exactly tackle the issues Sunshine was facing. She became just another person she had to lie to. 

“Fred was seeing her too,” Sunshine said, remembering seeing the teen waiting outside the office when she finished her session. 

That was their connection, despite the wildly different circles they ran in at Hawkins High. 

“We need to get our hands on their files and see if there was anything they said that overlaps, or something that could explain why Vecna targeted them specifically,” said Dustin. 

Their plan was simple, as simple as a plan on how to solve a murder and find and kill a monster could be. Nancy had a lead she wanted to follow from Eddie’s uncle, who she spoke to earlier, about someone named Victor Creel. She wasn’t sure how or if it was connected, but she had a hunch, and they all knew better than to doubt a Nancy Wheeler hunch. 

Robin volunteered to accompany Nancy to the library with a plan to use Tamera to gain access to the library’s archives. 

While they did that, the rest of them took Max to Ms. Kelly’s house to see if she could get any information about Fred and Chrissy from the counselor. Max was crafty and Ms. Kelly was, according to Max, desperate for the redhead to open up to her. 

Steve parked a couple of houses down from Ms. Kelly’s and waited. 

“So,” Dustin said, unable to sit in silence for longer than a minute. “How are you liking Hawkins so far?” 

Kali, who shared the backseat with the boy, kept her attention out the window. 

It was springtime, which meant everything was coming back to life. Flowers wore their buds with pride and dead lawns started to recover from a harsh winter. If you didn’t know anything about Hawkins, you’d think it was a simple, quiet, lovely little town with room to grow in. 

“It is something,” she answered cooly. 

“Yeah, it can get a little weird,” Dustin said as if Hawkins was more kooky than horror movie-like. He waited a beat before he spoke again. “Leia said you were in a gang-” 

“Dustin,” Sunshine swiftly cut him off, sending him a look that told him to be quiet through the rearview mirror. 

Kali turned her head, looking at Dustin with a slight scowl. “I found people who cared for me,” she said sharply. 

An embarrassed blush spread across Dustin’s cheeks. “No, y-yeah. That’s probably what she meant…” He trailed off, turning his attention to his hands folded in his lap. 

Steve missed the look Sunshine tossed at Dustin, prodding the conversation further. “Where are they now?” 

Sunshine half expected Kali to ignore the question, but she answered, “Fanned out across the country. We needed to lie low for a while and we weren’t exactly a group that blended in.” There was the smallest hint of a frown on her lips. 

Luke and Leia sometimes talked about Kali’s group of fellow misfits. There was a fixed feeling from the twins about the group, some they liked better than others, but they both were clear that no matter their feelings, they were Kali’s family. 

The conversation ended there, just in time for Max to run across Ms. Kelly’s yard and toward the car. 

“What’d she say?” asked Dustin. 

Max slammed the door shut and instructed Steve to drive. He punched the gas and Max let out a breath as she held up a set of keys. “She didn’t talk, but Fred and Chrissy’s files are at the school in her office. Everything we need should be there.” 

“You stole her keys?” Sunshine wasn’t sure if she should’ve been concerned or impressed. 

Max shoved the keys into her pocket and nodded. “Unless anyone has a better idea, those files are our best bet.” They couldn’t argue with that. So, Steve headed toward Hawkins High. 

From Dustin’s backpack, a muffled voice sounded, repeating Dustin’s name over and over. He fished his walkie-talkie out with a roll of his eyes. 

“Lucas, where the hell have you been?” Lucas had been MIA since the night before, but Steve had assured the group he was probably celebrating his team’s basketball win with his friends. Whatever he had been doing, Sunshine was just glad to hear his voice and know that he was okay. 

“Just listen! Are you looking for Eddie?” 

“Yeah, and we found him, no thanks to you,” Dustin said. “He’s at a boat house on Coal Mill Road.” 

Lucas sounded slightly out of breath as he spoke in a rushed tone. “You guys know he killed Chrissy, right?” 

“Bullshit!” Dustin yelled. “Eddie tried to save Chrissy.” 

“Then why do all of the cops say he did it?” 

Max stole the walkie from Dustin, much to his protest. “Lucas, you’re so behind it’s ridiculous. Just meet us at school and we’ll explain.” 

“I can’t. I think some real bad shit is about to go down.” 

His words were unsettling, and he didn’t elaborate which only made Sunshine more confused. 

“What are you talking about? What bad shit?” Max called his name a couple of times, but they were only met with static. 

“Should we go look for him?” Steve asked, drumming his fingers against the steering wheel. 

Dustin shook his head, stuffing his walkie back into his bag. “We should get the files first. Lucas didn’t mention his problem was a ‘Code Red,’ so whatever bad shit he’s talking about can't be that bad. Not yet, anyway."

“He could still be in trouble, though,” Sunshine countered. She didn’t like knowing something was out in Hawkins, hunting and preying on people, and not having tabs on everyone in their little group.

“We’ll radio him again at the school,” said Max. “If he doesn’t answer then, we’ll go find him.” 

With a sigh, Sunshine agreed. They’d just have to make their minor crime at the school quick. The only comfort she had was that Lucas was smart; if he stumbled into trouble before they found him, he had a good chance of getting around it. 

The school was empty, as they expected. Nightfall had chased away any staff doing maintenance or prep over spring break, leaving the building free for the group to break into. The main doors were locked after school hours, but the side entrance never was. 

They hurried down the hall, guided by their flashlights and Max, toward Ms. Kelly’s office. 

“Dustin, do you copy?” Robin’s voice was the next to crackle through the radio. She and Nancy had been silent all afternoon, which Sunshine hoped meant they were having luck in following Nancy’s lead. 

“I copy,” Dustin answered, his voice low in the echoey school hallway. 

“Nancy’s a genius! Vecna’s first victim dates all the way back to 1959. Her shot in the dark was a total bullseye.” 

They didn't have the time to unpack what that meant as they approached Ms. Kelly’s office. 

“That’s totally bonkers, but I can’t really talk right now,” Dustin said. “We’re kind of in the middle of breaking and entering into school to retrieve confidential and extremely personal files.” 

There was a brief pause on the walkie. “Can you repeat that?” 

“Just get your asses to the school, stat!” He removed his finger from the button and dropped his hand back down at his side with a huff. 

Using the stolen key, Max opened the door to the office and bee-lined for the filing cabinet. Sunshine joined her, holding up the flashlight so Max could read the names on each file. 

The boys wandered around the office and Kali kept watch at the door. 

“This is like a mini-Watergate,” Dustin said. “Hawkinsgate!” 

“Didn’t those guys get caught?” Steve asked to which Kali confirmed with a loud hum. 

Max’s actions halted as she found Chrissy’s file, plucking it out of the drawer before she found Fred’s. She tossed both down on the desk before sliding into Ms. Kelly’s seat and flipping through them. 

From the notes, it didn’t seem like the two had much in common. There were no notable encounters both of them shared. The only thing that stood out was a list of symptoms they had experienced prior to their deaths. They suffered from headaches, nosebleeds, and nightmares. For a monster, Sunshine wondered why those were notable, they had become so common in her life that she hardly registered them anymore. But, she realized, most people didn’t commonly suffer from one, let alone all three. 

“Max, what is it?” Dustin shined his light at Max when she didn’t respond. 

She had gone still, oddly still. Her fingers were frozen and splayed out on the files, her eyes unfocused, and her shoulders tense. 

“Max?” Sunshine leaned down, trying to get the girl to look at her, but Max still wasn’t answering. She curled her fingers around Max’s shoulder, gently shaking her and calling her name again. 

The air felt thick, and goosebumps rose along Sunshine’s arms as they all tried to shake Max from her strange state. 

Finally, Max’s whole body lurched forward and she heaved out a breath. Her eyes blinked rapidly before they refocused on the group around her. She looked frightened as she bounced her gaze around the room as if she was looking for something. It wasn’t until her eyes landed and stayed on Sunshine did Max seemed to relax just slightly. She gripped Sunshine’s arm tightly and took a couple of deep breaths. 

“Hey,” Sunshine said softly, brushing back a couple of sweaty strands of hair behind Max’s ear. “You’re all right. We’ve got you.” 

They waited until Max snapped back to herself, dropped her hold on Sunshine, and leaned back in the office chair. 

“What happened?” Steve asked, his eyes pooled with concern. 

“I was just…I saw…” Max trailed off and stood up. They had no choice but to follow her out into the hall. Just as they started following Max, Nancy and Robin showed up. Dustin quietly filled them in as they turned the corner, coming to a dead-end hall. 

Max shook her head. “It was right here.” 

“What was?” Sunshine asked. 

“A clock. It was one of those old and big ones. I saw it right here. I-It was in the wall.” 

“Like a grandfather clock?” Nancy asked, earning a nod from Max. “You saw a grandfather clock in the wall?” 

“It was so read,” she whispered. “Then, when I got closer, I just…woke up, I guess. And I was back in Ms. Kelly’s office.” 

“It was like she was in a trance or something,” Dustin said. 

Sunshine stared at the empty wall, looking for any sign that what Max saw had been real somehow, but nothing was there. 

Dustin continued, “It was almost exactly like what Eddie said happened to Chrissy.” 

A shuttered breath fell from Max’s lips, pulling Sunshine away from the wall. “That’s not even the worst part.” She brushed past the group once more and led the way back to the office. They all crammed into the smaller room, watching as Max dug around in the file cabinet again. 

She plopped down another file along with Fred and Chrissy’s but didn’t open it. “They came to Ms. Kelly for help. Fred and Chrissy were having the same problems. They had headaches, bad headaches that wouldn’t go away. Then nightmares, trouble sleeping. They’d wake up in a cold sweat. Then they started seeing things, bad things from their past. These visions, they kept getting worse and worse until eventually, everything just…ended.” 

“Vecna’s curse,” said Robin. 

“Chrissy’s headaches started a week ago. Fred’s, six days ago.” Max glanced down at the unopened file, her eyes suddenly glossy. “Mine started five days ago.” 

It felt like someone had punched Sunshine in the gut; she wanted to be sick. 

The same, brave little girl Sunshine met at the middle school back when Dustin first discovered Dart in his trashcan stood on the other side of the desk. Only, she was a bit taller, sadder, but still wore a brave face as she tried to conceal the waiver in her voice and the fear in her icy eyes. 

“I don’t know how long I have. All I know is that, for Fred and Chrissy, they both died less than twenty-four hours after their first vision.” She wiped her nose hastily. “And I just saw that goddamn clock so…so it looks like I’m gonna die tomorrow.” 

A firey feeling bubbled in Sunshine's stomach, a similar feeling to the rage she felt back in Starcourt Mall that night the Mind Flayer tried to get El. 

“No,” she said. “No one is dying, Max.” 

“You don’t-” 

“We will figure something out,” Sunshine said, cutting her off and leaving no room for argument. “We will find Vecna and kill him; I will kill him.” Because no one threatened her friends, her kids. If Sunshine could take on the Mind Flayer in its human form and manage to stay alive, then she could do the same with Vecna, no matter what he turned out to be. She didn’t have a choice if Max’s life was on the line. 

A loud clank echoed through the school, startling everyone out of the conversation. They exchanged a series of weary glances before Sunshine took the lead venturing out into the hall with her hands poised and ready to ignite. Steve told the others to stay put before he followed behind her, having grabbed the closest thing he could find to use as a weapon, which happened to be Ms. Kelly’s lamp. 

The noise grew louder as the two slowly walked toward it, on edge. The other did, in fact, not stay put. They followed a couple of steps behind, tense at the sound of running footsteps in their direction. 

Something turned the corner suddenly, coming at them. Sunshine’s hands sparked to life and Steve raised the lamp, but before they attacked, the something came fully into view as it skidded to a stop feet from them. It wasn’t a ‘something’ at all, but rather a someone. 

“Lucas!” Sunshine screeched, balling up her hands into fists with a heavy sigh. Her heart drummed wildly inside her chest. 

“What is wrong with you?!” Steve yelled. “I could’ve taken you out with this thing!” He shook the lamp. 

Lucas doubled over, breathing heavily. “Sorry, guys,” he wheezed out. “I was…I was biking for eight miles.” He held up one finger. “Give me a second.” 

Once he collected himself, Lucas looked between the group, his face glistening with sweat from his bike ride. “We’ve got a Code Red.” He marched up to Dustin, grabbing him by the shoulders. “I’ve been with Jason, Patrick, and Andy. They’ve gone totally off the rails. They’re trying to capture Eddie, and they think you know where he is,” Lucas explained. “You’re in danger, man!” 

Dustin sighed. “Yeah, okay, that sucks,” he said. “But we’ve got bigger problems than Jason right now.” He glanced back at Max. 

It was like Sunshine could hear the slow ticking of a clock as their time started to wane. A rhythmic noise in the back of her head that moved in time with the beat of her heart. Tick. Tick. Ticking faster and faster to let her know their time to save Max was fleeting.

[ihatedean]

please help my baby get his ear surgery done<3

thank you for clicking read more :)

so after months of testing the vet informed us a few days ago that our cat does, in fact, have skin cancer. to get more specific it's actually squamous-cell carcinoma.

(text is in spanish but im sure google lens can translate pretty well.)

it's affecting the tip/side of his left ear and hasn't spread to his nose or the other ear, so the vet recommended surgery to get the ear removed as soon as we possibly can. this would be on september 2nd, this monday.

exams like x-rays and biopsies have already been pretty expensive so i'm making this post to hopefully offset the cost of his pinnectomy (ARS$180,000->USD$189) even just a little bit. the whole thing has been really stressing and adding to that a messed up family situation where i can't ask them for help, please trust me when i say i wouldn't do this if i didn't need to.

details for the fic commissions:

my ao3 account for reference

right now im working on stuff for supernatural and formula 1 so that's where my brain's at, mostly, but ive done a lot of writing for jojo's bizarre adventure (im Very fluent with jotaro and all part 3-4 characters) and for the argies in the room, i've even written stuff for los simuladores and el marginal. i have no issues writing in spanish (rioplatense).

im also comfortable writing for genshin impact. been playing for years and im familiar with the lore up until fontaine. i've been itching to write something for a while :)

im Very Very familiar with x reader fics and will do OC x Character or OC x OC gladly as long as you provide character art or detailed descriptions to help me capture them best.

im comfortable writing pretty much every ship for the fandoms i named and can do gen, teen, mature and explicit works. im open to all kinks and have a history of doing incest and age-gap pairings. im comfortable with most dark themes— will write dub-con, non-con, cnc, and want to hear your weirdly specific skinks. in general, it's easier to say what i will not do than what i will. no judgement, as long as you respect

what i will not do:

horror

gore

necrophilia

violent non-con or explicit non-con (mentioning it in the story is fine, but i will not write the actual scene)

scat

vore

race play (hateful imagery/racial slurs)

kidfic

for formula 1 im simply inept at doing maxiel and c2. in general, i struggle with max and carlos. won't write anything for lando, sorry. anything else from 2010 to 2024 is fine, and im open to AUs of any kind as well as gender bending :)

pricing

Tier 3 — USD$5 for 500 words. 5 slots open

Tier 2 — USD$10 for 1k to 3k words. 2 slots open

Tier 1 — USD$25 for 4k to 10k words. 2 slots open

if i exceed wordcount in any case, it's on me. i'm a yapper.

contact me here or ask for my gmail in tumblr dms ^^

i can only accept ppal for USD$. if you're in argentina and you're interested, dm me for mercadopago info :)

(if you just want to donate that's totally cool. i just felt weird asking for money without anything to offer. it's a me thing)

ppal link

if you read this whole thing, thank you. here is the boy himself. he's almost 11 years old, incredibly grumpy, manipulative, called ugly by almost all my friends, has already gone through eye surgery so that's why his eyes look Like That, and on the rare occasion he sits on my lap i literally cry.

please put sunscreen on your cats, especially if they have white hair like aki. we didn't know for the longest time that exposure to the sun could cause skin cancer on cats and by the time we knew and started doing it, it was too late.