#ive been a little bit a lot obsessed lately. oh my god how are you so damn attractive

[slimeciclecock]

Forgive me for the person I'll become when Missa releases all his new music <- delusional

[many-gay-magpies]

For the ask game thing! If they haven’t been asked yet I’m super curious about 8, 15, 20, 23 & 24 (you do NOT have to answer all of those I’m just like super nosey and also pester-y)

oh thank you, i love to yap and i am absolutely answering all of these kdbfjfbfn (answering most of the non-fandom-specific questions about dbda because. well yeah)

8: i hope more people will come to appreciate...

honestly there are a ton of people that appreciate crystal in this fandom, and i am very gratified by the amount of people and posts i see preaching that she needs more appreciation/understanding/love, but like. there will never be enough crystal appreciation in my opinion. and while a lot of people love her character just as much as i do, there are also people (mostly in fics) that treat her more as an afterthought/backdrop for the boys or don't seem to really like her for her actual canonical traits, so i absolutely want more people to appreciate the beautiful mess that is crystal palace. and hey theres a whole crystal appreciation week coming up so thats gonna rock!!

although on a non dbd note. SCOTT MCCALL. hes literally the main character of teen wolf and hes amazing please love him. also alan deaton, he rocks and he gets far too much hate

15: the character that always makes me smile

unless its something angsty, i smile so fucking stupid every time i see charles rowland and his stupid pretty face i swear. his smile and goofiness and HAPPINESS are utterly contagious and i love him so much

20: my very first fandom

it was probably my little pony jfbjfbfjf. i'm talking when i was like,, i dunno eight? i wrote a whole fanfic for it in the notes of my service-less basically-ipod-with-extra-features little phone and made cheesy nextgens and everything. and if it wasn't mlp then it was how to train your dragon for sure, i was obsessed with reading fics from the dragons' POVs where they found more night furies and stuff. also crossovers. i had a grand old time!

23: the fandom i'm curious about because of a mutual

i can't think of any i'm interested because of a MUTUAL SPECIFICALLY, but god the amount of people putting that gay firefighter show on my dash has gotten me INTRIGUED. i actually went and tried to watch it but i couldn't and the intrigue has faded with my failure but its still there a little bit. also bridgerton, i've been seeing lots of bridgerton on the dash and it is tempting me. OH ALSO! i almost forgot, but interview with a vampire! and i actually did give into temptation with that one and watch the first episode while eating dinner a couple nights ago, it was absolutely amazing.

24: how has fandom positively impacted my life?

i think the biggest positive impact i've gotten from fandom is the sheer volume of interactions ive had with other people, and the friends i've gotten from that. like, i still have you from when i was mainly posting about teen wolf, and i've made so many great connections in the dbd fandom, whether they're just people i've made an impression on with my art and writing or people i've formed full friendships with (shoutout to nimm @babyseraphim for being probably the best friend ive made in this fandom? i love how loving dbd enabled me to meet and connect with you over so much OTHER stuff we have in common).

i really just love being able to connect with so many people over common interests and opinions; i've gotten a lot more outgoing/confident lately, irl as well as online, and i feel like fandom is at least partially to thank for that. ❤️

[suckishima]

haikyuu rewatch s01e01

i've been itching to rewatch the series lately and a few years ago i did something similar for miraculous ladybug where i wrote up like a stream of consciousness/commentary post and made a gifset for each episode and i wanna try to do it again for haikyuu?? we'll see if i stay committed or not lol—gifsets per ep probably a lot more likely to continue than commentaries tbh, these things are long and not thought out so,

anyway let's start with episode 1, who wants to take bets on how many times i get teary-eyed?

ughhhhh how did i not know IMMEDIATELY my first time watching what a fucking banger of a show this would be. this opening scene is sooo aah. the voice over with the sounds of the balls and shoes, the actual content of the 'a tall tall wall' monologue, and then the visuals of just hinatas shoes stepping up to the line and then 'it was a view i could never see on my own' and the rest of the teams shoes step in??? FUCK

holyyyyy and bc im obsessed i know who is who based on their shoes in that lineup and after thir 'onigaishimasu' and they run onto the court they all run in at different speeds?? and like tanaka goes quick and kageyama bounces on his toes and tsukki is all like unenthusiastic?? what the fuCK bro

its been literally 40 seconds and im in awe aaah

oh.. oh no it's the intro. i was joking before about getting teary-eyed but uhhh

how long has it been since i watched season 1 omgg 😭😭😭

gOD the opening is so good, not just imagination but the visuals rrr the practicing shots and the animation on all the volleyball looks so great wowow

one of the less talked about of the many crimes of getting movies instead of a 5th season is definitely the loss of another amazing opening and ending

damn did i really never realize that karasuno of the little giant's time didnt JUST go to nationals but theyre playing on center court when hinata catches them on tv? meaning its either the semi finals or finals, damn lol

hmmmm i am already conflicted about whether or not i wanna talk about manga spoilers in these writeups lmao. tumblr blockout spoiler text WHEN

anywayyyy manga readers hinata on his bike watching little giant on tv iykyk (and if you know me lol) right

rrrr the imagery of the crow flying into hinata from the screen with still the sounds of the balls and whistles aaah what a cool way to show inspiriation

huh, the libero is no.2 not no.4 is that manga accurate from just before furudate decided that it was a Thing for karasuno or did the animation not check?

okay i checked and you literally can only see the little giant in the manga and none of the rest of the team so im calling it an oversight on the animation side lol (understandable, tbh when youre just making people up to fill in the shot, you arent thinking about jersey lore)

no one cares but my japanese is surprisingly better than when i first watched (at which time i knew nothing) and i can actually understand a few bits here and there without the subs

reading the occasional katakana in the background is fun too. mmmm i should try looking at og scans of the manga to see how the sound effects are intended to be read, ive heard the way furudate incorporates the characters into the action as the sound itself is really well done

air salonpas!

oooo one of the teams practicing spikes had one guy hit left handed, thats a fun detail!

dude hinatas friends are such homies i swearrrr

'whats our opponent kitagawa daiichi even like' 'idk! but we're gonna win!' lmaooo hinata you coulda done SOME research

ooo the shot of kitagawa walking in and looming above hinata is so well done, they look huuuge. i know factually that kindaichi and kunimi are tall but i tend to forget, kunimi especially, hes got short energy to me 😅

yessss and the shot of kagyama walking by and just like his Aura is enough for hinata to pick up on the king vibes yooo its so goood

kitagawa daiichi banner is just 'victory' lol okay

i could use some of hinatas blind confidence in my life lmao

oh jk its bathroom tummy ache time

man the set up for kageyama as like powerful early on is SO good, weve only seen him twice so far and both times it all above the king cape, which im pretty sure is also supposed to represent how hinata sees him which rrrr what a great way to set up their dynamic knowing everything that's to come. greatest opponent to greatest ally etc etc

also thinking about how this IS basically all hinatas POV (including the quote i just referenced) and what kageyamas POV of hinata is when he looks back on it all 👀

kageyama telling hinata he shouldnt talk big bc he isnt even physically ready (referencing tummy ache), and hinata right off the bat telling kageyama 'the six of us go all the way' and kageyama responds 'i will win every game' oooo yep they both got some things to learn from each otherr

seriously how is hinata like the friendliest person on the planet. his team is SO bad and all he cares about is that he's finally on the court, he's so positive and determined even when they're doing terribly and his friends dont know wtf is going on

🥺🥺🥺 he's so happy seeing his palm all red after spiking the ball successfully the first time waaah

sjkhdk i always laugh at 'well there IS a foxy senpai on the girls team' lmaoo like he could have just ignored that part of the question, and who translated it to 'foxy' anyway lmaoo

koji, soccer friend, coming in for a foot receive! he missed lol but for real hinatas friends are so cool showing up for him like this

i mean, they are also avoiding him when he tries to practice throughout middle school, but they showed up here when it counts

love that you can see the 'mild internal bleeding,' as kuroo would call it, on izumi's arms when he tells hinata that his arms hurt lol

akjhsakjsasj they hype hinatas jumping skills, the music swells, you think hes got it, aaaand then immediately triple blocked and the music cuts back out lmaoo. honestly, love how haikyu always plays with expectations like that

half time serve routines my beloved.... i miss you..

'we keep trying.. because we havent lost yet' <333

but also kunimi, what a mood lmao

the animation on hinatas slide hit after the toss missss aaaah, and kageyamas bangs like whipping in the wind before he reaches as far as he can aah god this whole sequence is so beautiful

kageyama after knowing hinata for roughly 30 minutes: "this guy overwhelms me" skagsajsa

he has every quality to be someone even better but—WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN DOING THESE PAST 3 YEARS?? 😭😭😭😭

karasuno senpai in the crowd!! related dumb question time, why isnt tanakas hair blond here? he should be a first year atm, and the beginning of the ep said this match is about 3 years and 3 months after little giants nationals (which is in january, although iirc the month changed sometime around those years so possibly it was in march during his time—hence why call 'spring tournament') but either way if hinata and kageyama are still middle school third years then tanaka should be a first year and thats when his hair was blonde. likely in universe answer i guess is just that this tournament is after the practice match where karasuno loses badly and gets made fun of which makes tanaka respect his senpai more and shave his head lol. which also, if hes here with them at this middle school tournament also makes sense with that so. question answered i guess

'if you want to be the last one standing then become strong' waaah

awwww the first years that he recruited to fill out his team stayed with him to practice with the middle school girls team!! they caught the volleyball bug <3

not me pausing to try and see which one of them is the foxy senpai..

lmaoooo the "old ladies team" that hinata practices with are called the yukigoaka beauties lol nice

yoooo hinatas running toward the gym for the first time and a crow flys away and a feather crossed in front of hinata niiiiice

let me tell you i had relatively low expectations for haikyu my very first time. i just wanted something easy to watch while i ate my lunch during the day, and i thought it would just be a predictable underdog story where hinata gets revenge for middle school. and i wasnt against that, i was relatively entertained this whole episode, then it gets to the end and reveals that kageyama has to be his teammate and i was like OH this is gonna be GOOD good. immediately have me hope and reassurance that the show knew what it was doing and wasnt gonna just be typical cliches etc

fuck i wish i could watch again for the first time

i warned you this would be long lol, honestly these writeups are more for me in the future to like remember my thoughts etc and like i said we'll see if i keep it up lol

[fallout-lou-begas]

hi lou i was wondering if you had any recommednations as to where to start watching aew... ive only watched a little bit of wwe with some friends so i really have no idea if should start somewhere for Context or just dive right in with wrestling stuff lmao. but all of the pics of aew all out that im seeing are really really horny and it makes me think aew is up my alley. and i trust your opinions implicitly.

All Out 2024 is genuinely the most interested I've been in AEW in a long time because it was really struggling to retain me for the last couple of whiles, so I think my best answer to "where to start watching" is just "now"? like i seriously cannot stress enough how much it seemed like a major shaking off of a lot of funk that's kept me from watching live for a long time; maybe it's literally just because jericho wasn't on the card lmfao. i REALLY hope that they can keep up the momentum and it's not just a fluke, though

I don't consider myself particularly knowledgable or well-read about wrestling, I'm a admittedly a little myopic and maybe just a really horny dilettante, but what I recommend is finding a guy or a girl you like, and getting obsessed with them and looking through their backlog of matches just to see where it takes you, and maybe find other guys to get obsessed with through that. to be as brief as possible, here's just three of my own favorites and some pointers:

Kris Statlander: literally any of her pay-per-view matches after returning at double or nothing 2023. her whole history with Willow Nightingale especially is just amazing television, including their various tag team stints, like this personal favorite match against Mercedes Martinez & Diamante back when Collision. The reason that Kris and Willow clashing in a street fight at All Out was so significant was because these two are the street fight QUEENS, they've done 2-versus-2 street fights against the aforementioned Mercedes and Diamante, Julia Hart and Skye Blue, etc. before, and all of these are worth looking up.

Eddie Kingston: his journey through the Continental Classic tournament of late 2023 and early 2024 culminating in a grand finals match against Bryan Danielson at Revolution 2024 was something really goddamn special. The Stadium Stampede at All In 2023 is also lots of fun, he comes out bloody with a gas can and just looks sooooooo good

Bryan Danielson: he's world champion right now (incredible match against also-incredible previous champion swerve strickland at All In 2024) and obviously has no shortage of amazing matches across his very long history, but my introduction to live AEW was watching him TEAR through banger match after banger match on Dynamite from January to March 2023 (konosuke takeshita! bandido! timothy thatcher! brian cage! rush! literally so many different KINDS of wrestling) in the build-up to a 60-minute iron man match against then-champ, then-much-more-entertaining MJF at Revolution 2023, so check that out

Wait wait wait actually an honorable mention goes to FTR vs Bullet Club Gold 2-out-of-3-Falls, from July 15 2023, also from back when Collision was good. I love those wet freaks in the bang bang gang so much oh my god

[urlocalnonbinarybastardwrites]

hiii so i put in a request for the matching thing but you didn’t respond to it so im guessing i didn’t put enough info which i completey understand!!! very sorry about that, i hope ur still doing these requests if not i deeply apologize. anyway pls take ur time so so sorry!!

i’d also like to be matched with someone in pjo pls!

personal info ? 15 yrs old, i’m a girl, she/her(truly idc), bisexual, half mexican (white dad…)

physical: i have medium length wavy brown hair with grown out bangs, im 5’4 average weight, pretty tan, brown eyes, silver circle glasses, i wear smudgy eyeliner w/mascara, i either wear tank tops with big pants or big t shirt with shorts

personality: i’m honestly very weird with the people im close with, like very. i have brainrot humor so im always saying weird ass shit acting like it’s normal. i’m also very sarcastic and if im not very close with someone i give them like 0 reaction i guess? idk ppl tell me im nonchalant but that sounds rlly corny 😬 anyway im very embarrassing in public when im with my friends and they hate it but i think its funny idc!! im also pretty moody but im just a teenage girl!!!!!!! i dont get mad that easily tho like i can take a joke i just get ANNOYED easily but then ill be fine in a few minutes. also ppl tell me im very funny so 😇 meat riding myself YES IM A NO SABO KID I AM TRYING TO LEARN SOANISH.

hobbies/intrests: love love love listening to music, love tv girl, tyler, mitski, arctic monkeys, the smiths, depeche mode, the cure, lana, tame impala, beabadoobee and so many other generes and artists but i only know like 2 songs 😬

i also had a severe fnaf phase, avatar the last airbender, spiderverse, saiki, and obvi percy jackson

currently OBSESSED with slushy noobz they are my whole personality they are how i act. along with avascreams on tiktok ive literally had 6 different ppl tell me “you know that one girl on tiktok?? you act just like her” IM TRILY NOT EVEN TRYING TO ACT LIKE HER I SWEAR. also love sam and colby i full heartedly believe in ghosts just watch ima become a ghost hunter 😊😊

as of right now my hobbies are playing stardew valley and never getting my homework done, i also love to draw but im not very good at it. i also love painting but i haven’t done it in a while bc of school :(( i take piano lessons as well but again, not very good even after 5 years. i rlly like reading too but again bc of school i haven’t read as much lately, love playing with my pets (dog and cat) they’re so cute i love animals so so much i want more but yknow im busy, ive also gotten into working out bc im tryna lose this face fat🫥

likes: love carnival rides!!!! they’re so fun i love the fair SO MUCH. beautiful atmosphere truly. the zipper is so fun don’t let anyone lie to you. nature, i love going on walks in the woods but i can’t bc i don’t live near any😔 food i love food, korean, mexican, american, japanese, i love it all. english class! teacher is so sweet i love her and its also easy and boring so

dislikes: six flags. i hate roller coasters. annoying ppl like bruh stfu up OH MY GOD. when my mom asks me about college, leave me alone pls!

okay i truly don’t know what else to put i hope this was enough 😓😓

-faith 👐

Hey Faith, I am so so sorry that this took incredibly long to complete. I’ve been insanely busy these few months and lots of personal stuff going on so I really hope that this does it justice! And also also don’t be sorry I’m really sorry that this took so long

Your PJO ship: Leo Valdez 🔥🔥🔥 (man I’m jealous)

Explanation: honestly the best way I can explain this is that you’re crazy totally matches his crazy. Your freak matches his freak. is somebody gonna match my freak? Yes, someone will match your freak and that person is Leo. Starting off with your physical appearance, I think that he would be very attracted to you and I think you give a vague match of his mom like I feel like you look like his mom a little little bit, which is what kind of drew him to you in the first place I feel like he probably saw you in a crowd and his jaw dropped. He just thought that you were your clothing style. He also liked your eyeliner which he had you do on him whenever you guys got comfortable enough in the relationship he was like hey can I please have your make up routine done on me? He looked rlly hot but anyway- you guys are just so chaotic together with your personality like you match him so well I feel like Leo in order to make a relationship work with him. He needs to have someone that’s either vastly different than him or the same because I mean, I just see you guys as Deadpool and Vanessa, you guys so chaotic in public you guys would do so much embarrassing shit together and social anxiety would be afraid of both of you combined, a deadly duo. Whenever you were first getting to know each other, and you were more relaxed and chill around him less if you’re crazy with showing, that’s what kind of Drew him like he thought that your dynamic could be that you would kind of be more opposites, but then he slowly realize that you were just as fucking goofy and silly as him, and he would have a blast with you as you guys got further on into your even like just friendship that eventually turn into romance. You guys always have the funniest times together like I’m not joking. You guys would be the couple to go out with if you wanted a good time because you guys just yeah you’re chaotic and glorious and also really freaking funny and I mean yeah. (I would also like to let you know to do a deeper dive into your personality. I did research some of the people you mentioned that you were compared to and watched some of their videos and subjected myself to the painful amount of puns and batshit crazy, honestly I’m pretty impressed if people are comparing you) as for your hobbies, he would love playing Stardew Valley and I feel like he would romance. Sebastian don’t ask me why, but I just feel like he would. He would totally want Sebastian as I don’t know why OK I really don’t. I really don’t but anyway that’s just my personal theory. But he would love playing Stardew with you. He’s also a procrastinator when it comes to homework and work and taking things seriously in general so you guys would be quite the interesting duo and I feel like U2 would just end up making out during study date so if you want someone to study with? He’s probably not the best person. Also, I think that he would love your art and would be absolutely obsessed. If you ever did any artwork of him or just inspired by him like he would love that he would frame that shit he would brag to everyone about how good you are and same goes with piano he’s obsessed even if you think you weren’t very good after five years of playing he thinks you’re magnificent. It took everything in him to not compare you to Apollo because he knew that that would probably get you like blasted into the sky or something, but he just thinks anything that comes from you is good basically. That’s Leo Math.

You + Anything= Good.

He can never read very much because of his ADHD. I just feel like he would lose interest in books really easily unless they’re really exciting or exactly what he’s being into at this point, so I feel like he would get the being too busy to read. He also loves animals. He would absolutely snuggle all the pets in the world. I feel like he just loves animals. I feel like he especially loves dogs because they match his energy and he’s definitely like a golden retriever guy or maybe a Chihuahua guy one of them anyway dogs are very Leo core. Also, he thinks your chubby face is cute, and while he promotes working out for the healthiness of it, he thinks you have the wrong motivation if you want to get rid of that cute squeezable cheeks. (Multiple cheeks if ykwim) he also loves carnival rides and he’s a huge foodie so if you ever went out to him, you guys would end up eating more than your stomachs and belts can handle I mean yeah you guys would just be done if you ever went out to eat because he would order so much food and then I feel like because of his ADHD he’d be midway eating through another thing and then see other stand and be like babe. We gotta go there next. basically you guys would be extremely full. He also likes nature walks. I think that he kind of just likes the dirt of it because he’s definitely not afraid to get dirty and he loves just poking around nature I mean, I honestly that’s how I see him going on hikes like he’d pick up slugs, he do all kinds of like gross stuff. People normally wouldn’t do like I don’t know, letting a worm crawl on his arm or something.  anyway you guys totally match each other crazy and match each other’s freak yes just like the song, and I really ship it 💕💓💗💞💗💞

[prisonguards]

FR!!! Like oh my GOD I didnt even ship smallidarity before likeeeee I was just your average flower husbands fan, and I wanted to stick hard to the whole boundary compliance thing because I was part of dsmp twt for a year and. Well. That should say enough, iykyk. But then Joel just kept obsessing over Jimmy, Jimmy kept simping for Joel, and then the entire thing with the "he's just sooo cuuuute" and "can we just compare the size difference again, its my favorite thing ever" and whatever the fuck fixating on the noise Jimmy made was and it was like. Well. Bro. BRO. THEEEEN the having a CHILD together thing happened and I just fell into shipping them immediately from E2 alone. And now I'm watching E1 and I'm gonna rewatch 100h hardcore because your blog has just made it Worse.

This has been an entire tangent but the tldr is I didn't ship smallidarity until Joel was absolutely unbearable and obvious over just how much the cuteness aggression he gets over Jimmy Gets To Him.

Also I see your tags and I bring you this: in watching E1, am I insane or is the whole "Katherine was his first ally but I am his BEST ally, I will call her a coward and get genuinely angry at her for not going to the lengths I will to protect Jimmy" give off possessiveness. Not possessiveness as in jealousy, ownership, or anything like that but more in the sense that he takes great pride in being the one who takes care of Jimmy best, so to speak and to be the one who protects him when he needs it. This isn't really related at all to what you said but I'm doing my best and it's 6 AM as I write this, I have not slept and I should cut myself off before I spout even more nonsense.

- life series anon

ANON I LUV YOU AUSGEUE. I hope you get some good sleep friend aaueghd

I think that happened to a lot of people :3 smallidarity like was ramping up all season thanks to enemies to lovers being such a popular trope/dynamic but its Exploded in popularity lately and Im so thankful for that!!! whether it be from Joels fawning or their. insanity inducing innuendoes. the more fans the merrier ^—^

IM SO GLAD MY MADNESS HAS GOTTEN U TO WANNA REWATCH 100 HOURS :3c !!! its a comfort series for me for sure. and the episodes with Jimmy in them are. absolutely the best. ep 4 is one of my favorite episodes of anything ever. and if you want more Joel fawning over Jimmys cuteness…

YESSSSSS YES.. I ADORE THEM IN EMP S1!!! their dynamic is so unique there because of how wholly and overwhelmingly soft/positive it is. theyre allies from the start and BEST allies… auuughh.. yesshh Joel gets sooo defensive over Jimmy in s1 its beautiful. how quick he is to go absolutely murder mode for Jimmy. but how quick he is to be soft for him too. SIGGHHHHH. its my dream fr. the possessiveness.. YES.. theyre just SO important to eachother and it drives me crazy. he treats Jimmy so special. the way that he has little rooms for just Jimmy and Lizzie in his palace… the special roles they both hold… his wife and his best friend… there is def such a special connection there. and the possessiveness, Jimmy has so many more allies and close allies than Joel does. Joel just enforcing and affirming his station and specialness to Jimmy every once and a while.. by insulting his other allies augshs.. augh.. I just love them

also, for anyone else mulling over boundaries still; if you want specifics he just said he finds it “a bit weird” and iirc he didnt really say you cant do it. he just doesnt get it cause hes such a wifeguy. if youre concerned you can still tag it properly/keep it out of main tags. but if he was Really upset by it he would Not be encouraging and escalating it, and making the jokes he does, and putting them in his videos, and liking comments people make about them, and the tweets he makes, and and and and… if people are harassing u on behalf of him, they dont really care about what hes comfortable with, they just wanna punch down at someone. I get wanting to be respectful, but Ive also seen it used for such cruelty 💔 so I think the most important thing to keeping everyone, including the creators themselves, happy is to keep things to the right tags and spaces and being kind to yourself and others and blocking what you need and keeping out of peoples business.

[miksaslut]

heyy !!! me again could i possibly request a mikasasha threesome with reader in fanfic form ? ive been obsessing over mikasa and sasha recently !! thank u sm

crowded — by miksaslut

type of work: smut + fanfic CW // smut, THREESOME <3, use of strap-on, slight begging kink, praise kink characters: mikasa ackerman and sasha blouse a/n: BRO WTF THIS IS THE BEST ASK IVE GOTTEN?? oh to be eaten out by sasha while mikasa watches

“come on baby, you can take it, can’t you?” mikasa says sweetly as she caresses your breasts. you were sitting in between her legs, hands on your tits and lips kissing your neck. but that wasn’t why you were so worked up. you were practically gushing because of the perfect girl between your legs - sasha blouse. you were shaking, thighs pressing against sasha’s head while you thought of how you got here. mikasa had seen the way sasha checked you out. it was supposedly innocent, she would never do anything more than look, she just loved the way your tits sat on your chest and how flustered you got by one little touch. mikasa herself noticed these things about you, she loved how cute you were. “if you wanted to have a threesome, who would you want to have it with?” you had asked your girlfriend one day, not thinking much of it. “i dont know,” mikasa lied, “i hadn’t thought about it” she had thought about it. she had thought about how cute you would be, riding her fingers while sasha sucked on your tits. she had thought about how pretty you would be, cumming on sasha’s tongue before fucking you with her strap. she had thought a lot about it. “who would you want to have a threesome with?” mikasa asked, raising an eyebrow, genuinely curious. “sasha” you had said with hardly a hesitation. it was an in the moment thing, you hadn’t meant to say it but it was too late. you laughed trying to play it off like a joke, but mikasa just nodded slyly. “we can make that happen baby” so here you were, your pussy clenching and uncleching around nothing as sahsa sucked on your clit. she ate you out sloppily, tongue dragging along every inch of you. she was loud, moaning just from the taste of you. she couldn’t get enough of you. she loved how wet you were for her. “fuck mika its so- she’s so good” you bit your lip hard as sasha’s tongue swirled messily around your clit. “yeah love i know she’s good,” she thumbed at your nipple before pinching it, “now say thank you to sasha” you started moving your hips up and down, riding sasha’s face. “th-thank you sasha” you babble, mouth dropping open; sasha’s got your spot. your back arches higher, hips in the air. “r-right there fuck y-yes” sasha moans and mikasa laughs at you both. “look at you - so desperate to cum, so cute” your eyes roll to the back of your head and one of your hands looks to find something to grab. “mika yes im gonna fucking- ngh im gonna cum” you said between moans before gripping mikasa’s wrist. your legs shook and a shiver crept up your whole body as the knot building up in your stomach snapped. “fuck fuck y-yes i’m cumming for you” your nails dug into mikasa’s arm and sasha stopped sucking your clit, out of breath. she came up to kiss you, licking her lips. “god you taste so good” you laugh in her kiss, smiling with your head foggy from your previous orgasm. “my turn baby” mikasa said, while she pulled you towards her then changing positions, so you’re underneath her, ass up and head pressed into the mattress. she was sporting a pink strap on that teased you, the tip dragging along your slit. “mm- mika please put it in” “you can ask better than that, cant you lovely?” she traces hearts and stars in your back lovingly, waiting for your request. “please c-can you fuck me mikasa i need it so- so fucking bad” she chuckled and looked to sasha who was sitting in front of you, lacing her fingers softly through your hair. “what do you think sasha? did they do good for you?” sasha nodded and stopped playing with your hair; instead, playing with her tits. “mm fuck yeah they did amazing, came so prettily for me” mikasa smiled and aligned her silicone cock properly with your wet pussy. she pushed it in slowly and you let out a loud moan. “ah f-fuck it’s so- so big mika” sasha loved the way it slipped into you so easily, every inch disappearing perfectly inside of you. “shit” she said and mikasa laughed. “you’re doing so good y/n,” mikasa let out a breath, then took hold of your waist. “i’m gonna move now baby” you nod desperately. “yes mika please” she pulled out half way

before thrusting back into you. you grab the bedsheets and your breath increases. “god its so- shit its so g-good” “yeah i know princess,” she says cockily, “you just make yourself feel good yeah?” you nod again. god you loved the way she moved her hips. you loved the way sasha rubbed her clit so nicely, biting her lip and trying to hold in moans. you loved the way mikasa’s cock made your knees shake and your jaw go slack as you moaned absentmindedly. you moaned at every thrust, every touch, everything. the way sasha moaned for you made your clit throb, you loved her words. “fuck it feels amazing” “god just like that, you’re so hot” “you’re so pretty when you get fucked from behind” you already felt like you were gonna cum. “you’re- fuck i love it” “yeah love you want me to make you cum? you wanna put on a show for sasha?” you could hardly process what she said it felt so good so you just nodded. she thrusted harder, deeper until you felt your orgasm washing over you. “fuck yes i’m c-cumming” your eyes rolled back and your thighs pressed together while mikasa slowly pounded into you, easing you through it. you collapsed, breathless. sasha giggled tiredly. “whoever said three’s a crowd was fucking lying”

[inlovewiththefictionalcharacters]

SECOND CHANCE

CHAPTER - 1 : GARDNER

Pairing: (Dark) Andy Barber x Reader.

Warning(s): Non-Con; Dub-con; Slow-burn(Maybe); Possible Defending Jacob spoilers; Possessiveness; Grief; Angst; Any other possible warnings will be added in the future chapters.

Summary: Follow Andy’s journey after the horrible accident that turned his whole world upside down.

*****

Series Masterlist

*****

Never in his life did Andy thought he’ll go through what he did. His whole family and himself going through Jacob’s trial is one thing, but Laurie intentionally trying to take their son’s life by crashing the car to the side of the tunnel is another. He can’t even imagine why on earth did she even think that her son is capable of murdering someone. Sure, Jacob did do a lot of weird stuff that are not normally done by other teenagers. But he believed his son was innocent. And while his son was in coma, attached to IV’s, the woman who put his life in danger came out sustaining minimal injuries.

The events following that are even more ridiculous. No matter what Andy did, she always doubted him. He thought that he deserved it. After all, he did hid about his father from her and would have probably never told her about it if it wasn’t for Jacob’s trial. Andy was fine with her maintaining some distance from him after every thing that happened. After all, the distance was there between them and kept increasing during the trial. And then there was a lot of secrecy that confused him. They never maintained any secrets between them, well apart from Andy not telling her about his father. That really confused him. But what he couldn’t stand was the unbelievable hatred she’s got for Jacob and it kept growing each day. First, it was just her avoiding to look at any of Jacob’s pictures or things. He chalked it up to her feeling guilty about the accident. But then there was her literally just removing all the things that had any connection to Jacob and piling it up to one a corner in the room that those things were in. He didn’t understand why she did that. Not until one day he couldn’t find those things in those rooms anywhere and found them in trash, just as he found the baby pictures of Jacob in the trash can right before the car crash happened. And when he brought those things back inside their home and confronted Laurie about it, she just screamed at him, kept yelling at him that she didn’t want to see them anymore. It was during that time when she literally told him that she hates Jacob. Her own son. That she regrets giving birth to him and should have gotten rid of him like her friends told her to when Jacob was conceived. 

He can’t even fathom how a mother could hate her own son. And then she went on blaming Andy for everything that happened in their life. He tried taking her to therapy and even went to couples therapy with her, hoping to reduce the distance between them, but soon realized that nothing can fix things between them. Andy soon found out that one of the main reasons for the growing reasons between him and Laurie was the affair that Laurie’s been having  with some dude that kept visiting Newton frequently. He definitely didn’t peg Laurie for the cheating type, but oh well. 

But the final nail in the coffin was when Laurie tried to kill Jacob, again. He was visiting Jacob that day and Laurie insisted that she’ll tag along with him. Andy wasn’t up for it, but Laurie was persistent. Andy caved in and took her with him to the hospital. While Andy actually spent some time with Jacob in the unit, Laurie just stood outside the room, not even bothering to come. Then Andy went to talk to the doctor in-charge of Jacob’s treatment to check on the progress of Jacob’s health. When he returned, the sight in front of him chilled him to his bones. Jacob has his eyes closed and was struggling to breathe, his chest was moving frantically while Laurie just stared at him holding the oxygen mask he was wearing earlier, away from him.

“What are you doing?!” Andy growled at her, storming inside towards her while Laurie jumped and looked at him with wide eyes.

Hearing him, a nurse and doctor rushed in and helped Jacob breathe again and checked his vitals while Andy grabbed Laurie’s arm and dragged her away from his son. That was the final nail in the coffin. With some help from his previous employer, since he was still in her good books, Andy drew out a restraining order against Laurie for Jacob and also signed the divorce papers, also stating that he wanted to get full custody of Jacob. He had stayed in Newton till the divorce was finalized and also got full custody of Jacob since Laurie wanted to do nothing to do with the kid which made it easier. The house was sold too and he didn’t bother packing anything that Laurie had any input on. He just packed all of his stuff and Jacob’s sold some stuff and then gave some to charity and then moved to a place where all the ruckus and the media circus was far less. He wanted to live in peace and hopefully, Jacob will heal in time. He hoped that Jacob will be all good and healed in no time but the progress on his part is way less.

*****

It was another day spent working in the little bakery that Y/N owned. Y/N was truly lucky to find Gardner of all places to settle down for now. And she was even more lucky to find this gem of a bakery that was on sale. She literally placed almost all of her savings on it and didn’t regret it one bit about it in the past 3 years. The sales were good and the staff of 4 that worked in shifts were also good and understanding, never making a mess about things. They were like her second family and were there for her when things got a bit overwhelming. She hated dumping her stuff on them but they lived in a community and most were practically a few streets down from where she lived. 

It was a few minutes past 3 in the afternoon and Y/N looked at her watch and cussed.

“Damn, I’m getting late today...” she muttered and looked up at the older woman who was one of the staff.

“Agatha, could you mind taking over for today? Charlotte is closing today and I have to go... I made a promise...” Y/N started and the older woman just her off.

“Just go on child. Don’t worry. Char and I will look over the place. You stay safe on your way” she told her.

Y/N smiled gratefully at her, grabbed her purse and dashed outside. 

By the time she reached home, she sighed in relief and jogged towards the threshold, unlocked the door and walked inside, closing the door behind her. Walking into the living room, a smile broke on her face at the sight in front of her.

“MAMA!” a voice yelled enthusiastically upon her entering the living room.

Y/N crouched down as the toddler ran towards her as quickly as her little feet can take her and she wrapped her arms arounds Y/N’s neck.

“Hi baby!” Y/N cooed as she pressed kisses on the hair and forehead of the little toddler.

“Hi mama! I vuv you!” the little being said.

Y/N’s gaze then landed on Elie who was babysitting her little girl and smiled at her which was returned. The teenager has also been a savior babysitting the little girl whenever Y/N asked her too.

Y/N then looked at Ada, her little girl and told her “Baby, why don’t you go and get your things while mommy speaks to Elie?”

Ada nodded her head and quickly dashed towards the huge box of toys that she has. Y/N then looked at Elie and sighed.

“God, Elie. You are literally my savior, have I ever told you that?” she asked.

Elie grinned and replied “I think you might have mentioned it a time or two, but meh. Ada is the sweetest, and the most easiest to deal with. And I love hanging out with her.”

Y/N smiled gratefully. She still couldn’t understand how she got this much lucky with everything. She then pulled out thirty dollars out of her purse and handed them to Elie, who took them and bid goodbye for the day. Just then Ada ran towards her, with a few of her stuffies.

“Mama! Tea pawty!” Ada yelled enthusiastically. 

Y/N chuckled and grabbed a blanket along with a few of Ada’s stuff for the tea party with her stuffies and the two of them walked outside towards the tiny lawn they had. After setting all the things down, she sat down with Ada and was busy playing with her when the movement of a truck got her attention which was following a sleek black Audi that stopped in front of the house beside theirs. It used to be empty, but Y/N heard from Mrs. Williams that the previous owners have finally sold it to someone, but Mrs. Williams didn’t know any details about the new owner. 

Y/N saw the the truck stop behind the car and the packers and movers immediately opened the back of the truck, carefully moving all the stuff out and to the inside of the house while a guy got out of the car and lead them inside. From what she could see, he’s tall and got dark hair. While Y/N was looking at all the movement that was happening, little Ada’s gaze was transfixed at the sleek black Audi. The little girl, according to Y/N has an unhealthy obsession with cars, way more obsession that what a normal toddler has. 

“Look, mama! Carrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!” Ada said, prolonging the R, making Y/N look at her and giggle. 

She could literally see Ada’s eyes glowing while staring at the car and Y/N shook her head in amusement. Unbeknownst to them, the owner of the said car suddenly turned his attention towards his new neighbors and caught the cute little girl’s gaze on his car and a small smile grazed his lips.

[ad1thi]

underrated stevetony fics rec list (P1)

i feel like a lot of really good stevetony fics get swept under the rug because this is such a big fandom and sometimes people miss out on quality content?? so this is a rec list of some of the stevetony fics i feel like everybody should have read/ be reading

Edit (31.12.2020): this got very long (i had almost 50 fics on my list, so ive decided to split this list into two parts. part 2 will be out soon!!)

Edit (20.02.2021): part 2 is out now!!

//

picture me in the trees: @ifmywishescametrue

Tony and Steve were childhood friends that almost became more, but Tony moved and they lost their chance. Thirteen years later, a chance meeting brings Tony back into Steve's life.

Free: @iwanttopizzamanyou

"Steve reads, and the words dance in front of his eyes, because while this used to be his dream, what he wanted, all he can think about is how this Hell will soon become his full time life."

Steve discovers fame, with fans waiting for him in the lobby and girls passing him their numbers after the shows. It used to be what he wanted, he supposes. Except his future managers keep asking more and more from him, and he's not sure his old life will survive. Tony is ready to help, and compromise, but Steve maybe isn't anymore.

making it work: @/ironarm 

“Just tell him you don’t want to see him anymore,” Clint replies, finishing the end of his burger and starting to crumple up the wrapper, “It’s not like you love him or anything.”

“Clint, if I thought I could get rid of him about a week ago, I would have. But for some fucked up reason, I can’t lie to him. It’s like, I see those baby blue eyes, and bam. Whatever barrier that I built up from childhood trauma is gone.”

Clint chokes on the last piece of his burger, almost resisting the urge to smack Tony on the side of his head.

Tony was a fucking idiot.

Boys Like Us: @naferty

The video had been a mistake. One of the biggest mistakes he had ever done in his life, and considering Tony Stark had done a bunch of shit in his younger years, and even older years, that was saying something.

It was just that none of those things were as embarrassing as that video.

He blamed Clint for everything

Stained Fingertips: @thesoundofnat

“I don’t really believe in magic,” he said, clearing his throat. “But I’m almost certain you’re a goddamn wizard, Steve Rogers.”

Steve would remember those words for the rest of his life.

(Or, Steve is maybe slightly obsessed with drawing Tony. Not that Tony minds.)

Inhale, Ex-Sail: @summerpipedream

"Rich pirates decked out in top-of-the-line black market gear,” grumbled Tony, ”why don’t I have the budget to make those again?’

Rhodey inched back so that he and Tony were back-to-back. “We’re apparently law abiding citizens now, which means having to pay taxes.”

Tony scowled. “Urg, right. Remind me why I wanted to do that again?”

Rhodey rolled his eyes. “What was it you called him last time? Your sweet tart? Your apple pie in the sky? The wind beneath your wings? Hopefully he’ll fly here fast enough so we don’t get killed. Or worse, mugged.”

Tony Stark Bingo K1 - AU: Steampunk

As Constant As A Star: @atsadi

The Swan Princess AU

As young children, Prince Anthony and Princess Natasha of neighboring Midgardian kingdoms are betrothed, and spend their summers together every year until they are wed. Tony adores his headstrong friend Nat: it’s her scowly little companion Steve he’s not thrilled about at first. But soon Steve goes from being a thorn in Tony’s side to being his dearest friend – and much, much more than that. Despite Steve feeling the same way about Tony, the pair still dance around each other for years as Steve struggles to accept his feelings for another man: especially one already betrothed to another. Not to mention that Tony is a prince, and Steve is nothing but a squire.

But before they can make peace, Tony is kidnapped and dragged into the beginnings of another conflict in the nearby magical kingdom of Asgard – he really hates magic. With his potential usefulness diminishing by the day, Tony races to escape even as Steve, Natasha, and their friends race to find him and bring him home.

And—just to make matters worse—Tony has been trapped by a powerful spell and turned into a swan, of all creatures. He really, really hates magic.

Always Yours: @hollyjollyhope

Getting kidnapped is normal for them, at this point. But there's nothing normal about this.

And suddenly, Tony has a choice to make.

Oxeye Daisy (patience): @s-horne

“You make me want things I can’t have.”

Steve startled at the voice from behind him and turned around to see Tony standing in the kitchen doorway. He stared straight at Tony for a long moment. The room was quiet, time stretching out in a thick and uncomfortable silence as neither man dare to move nor opened his mouth to speak first.

White Clover (a promise): @s-horne

“Hey, sweetheart.”

Tony lifted his head as he tried to focus on Steve’s voice. When he managed to open his eyes and blink a bit of the blurriness away, he was rewarded with a gentle smile being shone down at him.

“There you are,” Steve said. “Was worried I was going to have to talk to myself.”

Though his tone was light, Tony knew what he meant. It was no secret that Tony was physically weaker and a hell of a lot more human than Steve was and was therefore struggling more with the lack of regular nourishment that came with being held hostage.

“Course not,” Tony said back, voice hoarse but plastering a smile on his face all the same. His head was pounding and his eyes couldn't stay open. “Would I ever do that to you? You’d never get a sensible answer.”

Acta non verba: @firebrands

unapologetic fluff about two idiots who can barely keep it together with how hard they're crushing on each other

or:

tony has to help steve with math + a halloween party = a good time for everyone, eventually

you take me higher than the rest (everybody else is second best): @firebrands

tumblr fill for adi & anthonydarling, who asked for "'Prank' war, but the kind to see who can make the other blush the most in public" from this prompt list

Adjacent, Against, Upon: @firebrands

A political AU!

Steve Rogers is running as the Mayor of somewhere, America. Tony Stark, his campaign manager, deals with a candidate who isn’t interested in lying, and just wants to do good by these citizens, god damn it.

song of unrest: @omg-just-peachy

How was Steve supposed to reconcile all of this? The way he looked so different but still felt so much the same? It made Steve’s head spin. He knows he shouldn’t care so much, that he is what he is, but he just wants to know.

Paint The Town Blue: @omg-just-peachy

Ten years since he’d seen or spoken to Tony Stark, ten years since they’d broken up to go away to school. And now this email. It could be his only chance to see Tony again.

Camelot: @weethreequarter

For one shining moment, there was Camelot.

In 2019, Karen Page meets Captain Steve Rogers to conduct an exclusive interview on his late husband, President Tony Stark.

In 2007, Steve meets Senator Tony Stark and falls in love.

he thinks he’s lancelot (but he’s more of a sir lamorak): @theotherwasdeath

Tony knows firsthand that violence isn’t funny. So why oh why does he think that the scene playing out in front of him, Steve and Victor Von Doom in a knock-out, drag-down fist fight, is absolutely hilarious?

wildflowers: @tinytonysnark

“So,” Steve begins, clapping his hands together, “the city of SHIELD is in debt. The big ups have sent for financial advisors, all the way from DC! They’re gonna take a look at the city’s spending and make some cuts.”

He squints at the camera against the morning sun shining through the courtyard, “I’m not that worried. Everyone here in the parks department is an important member of the team and absolutely needed.”

The camera swings towards the office where from the large glass window, Natasha can be seen picking up the ringing phone before immediately slamming it back down onto the receiver.

[A Parks and Rec AU]

trinkets of your affection: @starklysteve

Kissed him once for every year I loved him, Steve had written.

By that count, Steve owes him five more kisses now.

Tony traces the words, hands trembling, and tips back a shot of Howard's ancient whiskey. None of it burns anymore.

One day, he'll have lived more days without Steve than there are words in the diary.

For the first time since he'd woken with shrapnel in his chest, Tony fears the future.

----------

Or, five things Tony keeps to remember Steve by, and one thing Steve gives him to remember.

[catnippackets]

have you seen/would u recommend pacific rim 2? ive heard some things about newt and idk lol

I feel like Im in the minority that actually did think pru was fun but that being said it ended SO abruptly and with like three separate plotlines completely abandoned that I was really frustrated for days after watching it until I had processed everything and had time to think deeply about it lol it just seemed rly unfinished?? it feels like it was deliberately made as 1/2 of two sequels and there needs to be one more to tie everything up. actually I’m gonna ramble abt this bc I have a lot of thoughts (obvs spoilers under the cut)

the thing about the second one was that I genuinely was enjoying it right up until it ended because I swear to god the moment the end screen went up I yelled "what the fuck, that's it?" out loud into my bedroom bc I was so SHOCKED that THAT'S how it all ended, because it just seemed so incomplete?? Like it seemed like one half of a story, that will only be made whole if there's a third one to tie up all the plotlines that they didn't go through with in the second and if that's the case then I will be completely fine with it but if it doesn't or if they dont have a third one at all I will stay so frustrated lol. one silver lining to this is that the vibe of this movie was so different from the first that it almost feels easy to separate it and just imagine it as an AU if you prefer which is sort of nice; usually if a piece of media I like does something bad I feel all gutted and anxious and terrible that this is the canon I have to accept, but something abt this movie just made it feel like it was sort of a totally separate deal. maybe cuz only 3 of the original characters were in it idk

to start off: I felt like there were a couple of plotlines in it that were just sort of introduced and then never seen through which was very ????? Amara & Vik's weird hate-rivalry thing was one of them; Vik instantly has it out for Amara bc she’s jealous, which is a very interesting concept, and then this prompts Amara to become hostile right back at her, which is also a very interesting concept, and then it never got resolved at all? like they couldve done something really cool with those two but it just never went anywhere. and then there was sort of a weird love triangle thing happening between Jake and Nate and Jules that felt so weird bc it had no significance to the plot at all and it felt like it was only thrown in there for the sake of having ~romantic drama~ idk maybe I wasnt paying too much attention and there was more to it than that but it really just seemed like they wanted to put romance in there and didnt want to bother to put any work into it

BUT the thing about romantic sub plots is that THERE ALREADY WAAAAS OOOOOOOOONE which brings me to the biggest frustration I have w this movie because--and DISCLAIMER, this was also my favourite plot point of the movie bc it was by far the most interesting, the biggest reason for me enjoying the movie at all, and the bit I feel like should have had WAY more attention--Newt and Hermann were like legitimately in love in this movie I swear to god I was watching it and thinking “this is GENUINELY the most blatantly gay thing I’ve ever seen in a feature film and I know that straight ppl are very talented at writing gay romances completely by accident so it’s possible that they just accidentally did it this way but also it is REALLY goddamn obvious oh my gooood?” (and then I did a lot of frantic googling and found out that I was right and Charlie Day & Burn Gorman knew what the fuck they were doing and I felt so validated lol), and yet despite this, the movie had them speak for the last time almost at the halfway point of the film and then spend the entire second half apart and not talking at all and even at the post-credits scene where Jake and Newt talked for a bit Hermann wasn't there?? not even behind Jake to give Newt any searching glances?? Nothing??

dude...Newt being possessed by the precursors is a HUGELY interesting concept that actually makes sense and I wish it had had more attention. I’ve seen a lot of ppl say that pru butchered Newt’s character and I don’t 100% agree bc like...being possessed will change you lmao so while yes I’m obviously sad that he wasn’t himself, I feel like it made sense that he had a slight personality change, because it...wasn’t him anymore. we don’t really see the Newt we all fell in love with in the first movie. we THINK we’re seeing him, but halfway through we find out we’re wrong.

my critiques with that plotline are basically that I wish the reveal had happened a little bit later on, and I wish that it had been a little more obvious I guess?? like, we definitely get hints of it (when Hermann excitedly asks Newt to help him with a dangerous unorthodox project and Newt says “dude why are you doing something so risky when we’ve already got a good plan in motion? just wait for that to be done, it’s fine” and Hermann IS us, he IS the audience when he reacts, because this is a completely insane thing for Newt to say. Newt, who, in the first movie, was so obsessed with finding knowledge that he went behind the marshall’s back to literally risk his life doing something incredibly dangerous just to see what would happen? being given the opportunity to do the same kind of dangerous frivolous act and refusing? this is blatantly out of character, and Hermann is all of us when he’s shocked, “what, you mean you...won’t help me??” which means it wasn’t bad writing on their part, it was purposefully supposed to stand out as something that was wrong and something that we needed to pay attention to. that was a really good scene to hint that something was Not Right with Newt), and I wish there had been a bunch more like it. I think the reveal should have been saved for the end of the second act; I think that should have been the moment that act 2 of a story usually has, that dreadful event that happens that leaves the main characters feeling completely hopeless and unsure what to do.

I also wish that he had managed to break through more than That One Scene, I think it would’ve been more dramatic if he’d had a few moments where he managed to take control for a second to remind us that he’s still in there and still fighting, and I’m sad they didn’t do that. I saw a fan comic that touched on this idea and I think it’s brilliant, even the idea of him suddenly getting a nosebleed and acting distracted to show that that’s the Real Him trying to fight through would have been sooooooooo good.

I also feel like it didn’t make any sense for Nate to be the one to subdue him in the end, I dont even think those two interact at all so like, why was it him?? it would have been so much more dramatic and heartbreaking if Hermann had been the one to confront him so they could’ve had a little conversation on the roof where Newt could once again break through for a second before getting taken over and then Hermann could like idk have a taser hidden behind him that he uses to subdue him and THAT wouldve been a way sadder and more interesting way to do it. I also think Hermann shouldve been the one to speak to him in the post credits scene, or to have him in the background behind Jake just watching him sadly so we can get a couple shots of intense eye contact like UGH I just wish there had been more interaction between the two of them after the reveal happened!! When the movie was over and I realized they never spoke again I felt so upset!!! they're soulmates!! they're literally in love!! this has been CONFIRMED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and segueing in from the soulmate thing, another thing that made me sad was that nobody came in pairs anymore :( aside from Newt and Hermann, they were the only ones gjdfk but in the first one every character had another character that they were paired up with, both for drifting reasons and just for plot reasons (except Chau and Tendo but I’m pretty sure there's actually significance to that too), and in the second one it just sort of felt like everyone was drifting with each other with no strong connection needed and that made it feel way less special. granted, the movie takes place ten years after the first one so in that time maybe technology advanced to the point where you didn't need a strong neural connection to drift anymore, but for the sake of the story it would have been way better if they'd kept the whole soulmates concept from the first one, it made it way stronger and more special

so yeah in conclusion I did think pru was enjoyable and I probably would watch it again some time but also it definitely pales in comparison to the first one and I’m desperately hoping we get one more so they can tie everything together and FIX THINGS KFGH it’s not too late!!!!! I wish I could write Pacific Rim 3 I genuinely think I would do a good job I love storytelling and I’m very passionate about these characters!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[tigerdrop]

okay kind of obsessed with the body swap art tho. idk why i just like benrey getting to bully gordon with his own body, his own voice, and i like gordon trying to navigate whatever weird shit benrey’s got going on. gordon not being able to figure out or control whatever organs in benrey’s throat produce sweet voice so it’s just spewing whatever emotions he’s feeling at random (including Horny? uh oh. can’t hide that as easily as a surprise boner can you gordon?)

this ask kicked me into actually thinking about it and your brain is so huge. massive. i lost control

last night i was struggling to articulate thoughts for the body swap thing but this is kickstarting me. i. really love bodyswap stuff........(sighing) i am yet again having to confront the fact that i latched onto an embarrassing number of Things after having first read about them in [REDACTED]. truly hate being alive

so like......potions. you can get into a whole lot of weird stuff with potions. truly loving that darnolds 5-minute existence gives me an excuse to think of the stupidest horny potions scenarios

and why in the fuck wouldnt he have a bodyswap potion just chillin in his lab. why wouldnt benrey crack that bad boy open and take a sip while darnolds bitching at him "dont you touch any of those goddamn potions. im not gonna tell you which ones which so if you die, you die"

gordon claps benrey on the back afterwards like "well, thats a risk im perfectly happy for him to take" but uh oh you fucking buffoon. the touch is what activates it. and shit just starts spinning and schlorping in his mind and he nearly falls over clutching the lab bench next to him and when he cracks his eyes back open, hes........shorter. and everybodys asking if somebodys okay but that somebody isnt him and hes kind of miffed about that

and then gordons head turns and he sees Himself being steadied on his feet by tommy and darnold and hes like.......guys? guys. hello! and the sound of benreys voice coming out of him with that irritated and loud timbre makes everybody turn to face him........b/c that is so insanely weird coming from him

im like way into the idea of benreys, like, Eye Darkness Thing transferring to gordons face when their bodies are swapped, too. its just his malevolent energies manifesting physically no matter what body hes in

Wait god wait. Like. Benrey in Gordon's body and he gets horny for some reason and has to live Gordon's fucking pained life of the suit edging the hell outta him- Bc now Gordon can actually fucking jerk off for the the first time in days. No edging bullshit from the hev suit

benreys newfound appreciation for why gordons such a bitch all the time

RRRRRRRRRRR gordon able to go wild beating his meat that night finally but right before he does he stops because hes looking down at. 8)!

YES EXACTLY....... gordon freeman humbled by the sight of benreys huge meat. except its his meat now 

at first he only feels mildly weird about jacking it when hes not even in his own body right now but hes been edged for days now and hes just thinking "if i can just get this out of the way now, ill be clear-headed for however fucking long im stuck in black mesa. maybe this is why ive been so goddamn stupid lately. yeah"

but then he gets some time and space to himself at long last and unzips and the shock of seeing benreys huge uncut dick instead of his own brings him back to reality like "?oh my god what the fuck am i doing"

embarrassment! guilt! but also hes still fuckin horny and eventually curiosity wins out. whats the harm, right. its not like he has to say anything about it. and gordon freeman is (mostly) heterosexual and hes never been this up close and personal with a foreskin before and hes just......curious. scientifically

maybe hes even.......locked himself inside one of the company restrooms while hes at it. just to make sure hes got privacy. and there is a mirror right there........  he was gonna just bust one out and leave as fast as he can but now hes curious

starts. thumbing the hem of his shirt under benreys vest. starts lifting it up experimentally just to see where all that hair leads. out of curiosity. and seeing the curve of benreys stomach peek out in the mirror makes him hiccup on sweet voice inadvertently 

weirdly enough theres a part of him thats both relieved and disappointed that hes never seen that color before

he never envisioned that seeing benrey like this would be a turn-on but like......with that vest and that helmet on he just looks like some kind of fuckin roundish rectangle shape. but now gordons intimately familiar with how his body feels to move around in......what hes gotta look like underneath all that armor and ill-fitting work clothes......and the hornier he gets the stupider he gets

takes off the helmet.......just to test the waters. if somebody manages to bust in, thats not so weird to explain. and hes surprised by the shock of black hair he finds under there. he doesnt know what he was expecting....but honestly, benrey looks, like, kind of nice like that. more like a person

im slightly obsessed with the idea of benrey just not even registering as a Real Guy, physically, to gordon, one that he could possibly be attracted to, until hes out of his work uniform.......like hes more of an icon of a person than anything up until that point. pure signifier. no substance

like......you know......the equivalent of how benreys HL model registers to 99% of people watching the series. sure, thats not necessarily anything youd register as "hot", most likely, but then u peel that away and its like........Oh

the model is the icon and the representation of the icon is the real

and gordon runs a hand thru benreys hair and tries out one of those shitty little smirks benrey likes to use on him and the effect is.......dizzying. is that him? is that what benrey really looks like to him?? he feels fuckin salacious doing this

he can even.........get his face up close to the mirror and really look at those teeth

run his tongue over them experimentally.......feel their sharp edges.......and, no, theyre not sharp like a knife, but they are definitely pointy. and surprisingly well-kept......hes never seen benrey brush his teeth before but clearly he must. theyre so smooth and slick under his fingertips

and then he flushes and drops his hand b/c hes getting some weird fucking thoughts right now........but looking back up at himself in the mirror and seeing benreys face all wide-eyed and red makes the issue worse

oh, you really like seeing him look like that, dont you. and gordons pissed b/c this isnt even his fucking brain but its still whispering the exact same neurotic, self-defeating shit at him that hes trying very hard to tamp down

and then he starts getting a little crazier. taking off the vest. he can explain that, no problem. its just kind of hot. heavy. he needed a breather! its normal. just in here to splash some water on his face and cool down, nothing wrong with that. but that just makes benreys shirt all the easier to access.......and he tugs the hem of it just a little higher and looks at himself in the mirror and runs a thumb over the curve of his stomach, where the hair is thickest, and he shivers

gordon freeman is deeply normal and would never get off to the sight of a guy with arms the size of his head tentatively dragging the hem of his shirt up, just for gordon to look at him closer

hands shaking from nerves as he decides to loosen his tie and start unbuttoning and he sees more and more hair-dusted skin and muscle and fat and a thin sheen of sweat reveal itself

> i could see gordon trying to tense and flex the muscles a bit just because hes normal

HE IS, AND HE WOULD

he doesnt know when "being horny b/c hes been pent up and edged for days and he just needs to get his rocks off real quick so he can be normal again" turned into "being horny b/c the way benrey looks under his uniform is scary good to him" but if he thinks about that too hard hes gonna have a panic attack

tells himself that its all just because he hasnt been able to get off. thats why hes thinking this shit. hell stop thinking it once he nuts

> hey this is a quick aside but yknwo how he talks to himself in third person sometimes? what if he does and then kinda does a mental double take at how his name sounds coming out of benreys mouth, with his voice. ok thats it goodbye

oh ym god thats making me go insane. doing it by accident and then.........saying it again. on purpose. just to hear benreys voice doing it

getting one knee hitched up onto the sink and leaning forward with his arm braced against the mirror and his forehead leaning on his arm and tugging benreys dick (no, idiot, thats your dick right now, stop thinking about it) and tentatively groaning out his own name and it comes out so hoarse and desperate that it punches him straight in the gut (too bad, hes thinking about it, he cant not think about it, not with the way he looks and sounds right now)

> remember in the series when benrey called him gordon one (1) time and he noticed immediately and was like..i think thats the first time youve called me by my name.

he looks so fucked out and slutty in that mirror that it almost makes him pass out

eyes darting like hes trying to commit every single detail of how he looks right now to memory (b/c he is. he fucking is. he wants to make benrey look like this so fucking bad. just for him. wreck him and get him flushed and sweaty and panting and moaning gordons name and jesus christ, okay, thats where his brains taking him. okay. cool)

hes dizzying himself thinking about it. he knows benreys hot for him by this point, theoretically. assuming his weird come-ons werent just jokes. benrey would probably let him do this to him. benrey would probably want him to touch his dick. gordon thinks about how good it might feel for his own hand to be on benreys dick and he cant get himself solidly into one headspace or another - hes gordon, hes benrey, he wants to touch, he wants to be touched, he wants to feel his own hand on this dick (and god, maybe he could. maybe he could ask. wouldnt that be crazy.)

benrey in gordons suit and gordons body and gordons face leaning over him, b/c fuck, he really is tall compared to benrey, hes figured that one out awful quick. and gordons (his) hand on his (benreys) dick and stroking him and leering down at him with those dark, dark eyes that dont even really look like his eyes, anymore, not with the way theyre shaded over, and hearing his (benreys) (his) voice moaning out his (gordons) (definitely gordons) name and all the little "pleases" and "thank yous" that he cant stop letting out b/c benreys voice was made for it, made to beg and whine and ask so nicely, and his heads spinning as he comes all over the fucking mirror and sink

> i wonder if this could be combine with the ideas that parts of the self or like mind is still a bit left behind if that makes sense, like with benrey also wanting this that part of the reason gordon wants to say those things

"do you want to fuck him or do you want to be him?" well my good bitch, perhaps you can have a little of both. welcome to my personal hell

hes never come so hard in his fucking life and the noise that rips out of him when he does, finally, after days of being jerked around (ha ha) makes his ears burn with shame

now if you really wanna go crazy. imagine that benreys up and walking around this whole time b/c being edged by his stupid broken suit is making it impossible for him to sleep, and he hears........all of this. stops and presses himself flat agains tthe wall to listen

he cant actually get into the bathroom to scare the shit out of gordon/offer to join in/etc, b/c this stupid flesh body of gordons cant even noclip, but he can press his ear to the door and. listen. and he can flush all the way down to his chest when he hears gordon in there, moaning out his own name with benreys voice

so thats what gordon wants him to do, huh. thats what hes thinking about.

poor benrey, tho. he gets to experience just a lick of the endless fucking suffering that gordon goes thru every single day just by being alive, and "the HEV suit trying and failing to suck him off to completion while his dick twitches against the hard metal of the interior every time gordon groans in there" is just one small part of it

anyway . see ya. my final message

[furymint]

All Prompts

#02: Sway

#03: Muster

#06: Bonus

#08: Clamor

#09: Lush

#12:  Tooth & Nail

#15: Ache

#16: Lucubration

#20: Bonus

#22: Argy-Bargy

#24: Beam

Header  | Reflection of some of my favorite peers’ prompts under the cut!

@aethernoise​ -- #11: Ultracrepidarian

tired curses!!!! i also really love this contrast in their work..... its rly cute. alyx just saved the world and aymeric is hating the dictionary. i like how rough his narration is and then alyx calls and everything speeds up, and i especially love him staring into the empty room. it put another contrast between their circumstances, but its also rly damn accurate abt how it feels to share a moment over the phone w someone. it made me smile a lot

@ahlis-xiv​ -- #23: Shuffle

this one made me laugh ksjdf ahlis’ distaste for the saucer despite being drawn to it is hysterical, but it also mirrors a lot of her character flaws: avoiding vulnerability, placing stoicism before genuineness, planting her frustration on external things instead of herself. even confronting her own feelings draws some curses out of her, and i love that display of her personality.

@autochthonousone -- #09: Nonagenarian

i love me some reflection and mentorship. also im obsessed with “let ‘lone this ‘n”.........dialect is such a hit or miss thing when writing or reading, but god youve got it and i love that line so much. barry’s relationship w stalwart is even better tho, and i cant repeat enough how much i love their dynamic of fair/stern/wise and distant/brutish/actually-paying-complete attention.

@brave-horizon -- #12: Tooth & Nail

talk abt using the setting..............i rly struggle w incorporating setting so this was a little mind-blowing to me. we got a really cool action scene plus established an entire town and conflict all at once?? battle scenes are hard. but ur vocab is so precise and stuff like “seized midstride” and “spilling its pilot” are rly inspiring me rn!! wind magic is smth ive brainstormed in the past but u have such good ideas w it and im so pumped just rereading it. its so good

@erstwhile25 -- #05: Matter of Fact

oh my god. some kind of dialogue god comes down and hands kail all his words, or else he’s just the dialogue god himself. im leaning towards the latter. i wish to god i could say “very small dogs with the barest streaks of sanity” in daily life, and honestly i might start to. the crew of the rook are always a joy to see + the development of their conversation takes such a meaningful turn that it really sticks after the laughs

@endangered-liaison​ -- #05: Matter of Fact 

sorry not sorry jaejh is cool!!!! he’s super nasty and terrible and interesting and i loved his voice, but i esp love how well he pushed the conflict and just Ruined Everything. i rly live how his influence bleeds into the others through their fear. The kids go from hoping or expecting to smth better, to not even debating that he’s lying bc it will just turn out worse. the berry stains as a gun on the wall never struck me either, and i was SHOOK

@high-and-away -- #10: Avail

honestly this was the hardest one to pic a fav for. i rly loved so many of these bc they check a lot of boxes for my Brand. this one sits the longest with active conflict + does a fantastic job staying clear despite all the trails it picks up w max’s foil n comradeship, the chocobo’s higher level of pity over people, the chaotic pack of Resistance members, and the highlander that vicky reasons over n kills. i love that word “limning” now; ur vocab always finds ways to surprise me w the way u use them (esp in describing settings)

@holyja -- #03: Muster

usually when i think of lizzy writing, i think of how perfect ur verbs are, but this time i really liked the visuals and tone. hyana pushing food around her plate and sitting on the rooftops had such a lonely feel to them, but at the same time were rly enjoyable and clear imgs despite not having to be described forever. serella’s dialogue was perfectly on-the-nose, too. usually i rly linger on what is given too much detail, but this rly showed me how nice it is to air things out n leave the thought monologue unsaid.

@karoiseka --  #24: Beam

hell yeah memory lane time. i loved seeing CT from karo’s pov and seeing where her priorities lay or moved. i also liked the life u gave to the little parts left untouched by the narrative, like walking through CT and the heartbeat in the soul vessel. idk what could be more satisfying that a reunion either, so following karo into the ocular was some Good Shit

@mythrilreflections -- #15: Ache

does this get bonus points just for being in o’ghomoro? yes. i love how the tunnels are characterized by the senseless kobolds in them. the added pressure from their reasonings for being in this hellhole is even better, and i love the sigils concept. jace’s narration is so cold, too, which makes both the kobold’s ferocity and the team’s desperation more poignant: he doesn’t sound the type to exaggerate.

@norhimorovine -- #14: Part

this one just screams fairy tale to me. the others do too, but the repetition of events rly knocks this one up the flagpole of ‘belongs in some mid 19th century kids story collection.’ i LOVE the sisters’ banter, and how the younger daughter gets incorporated a bit further for her attention. having the soldier take little pieces of each environment to prove they were real made them a lot more real to me, too.

@snowbird-down -- #03 Muster

if u think im NOT gonna lose my mind shrieking over stream of consciousness as one of the #1 ways of writing trauma, u have not been around me for very long. the varying sentence length is rly successful here, and i esp love the part where people are rushing into the ship and she has to stab a dude to keep him from coming aboard. it’s such a back and forth determining who is humanity and who is the faceless antagonist for a minute, n ofc i love that.

@stars-bleed-hearts-shine​ -- #28 -- Irenic

i was p surprised that my fav of urs came so late, but i feel like this piece has a lot of what your really good at, and which i admire a lot: you aren’t afraid of emotional dialogue or arguments based in more than factual debate, and you capitalize on casual thoughts that reveal a lot more than they do at face value. i esp like that you rly make the most of two characters that overlap in values and personality so often--they acknowledge that overlap and work together with what they share.

@yunkinko​ -- #05 Matter of Fact

im gonna forget abt that little rat line bc the last line is a kick in the teeth. i always admire ur ability to expand tiny details into lasting events. x’arhll’s musings also cut so different from the rest of the scene, separating her from the others and mhifa even further from her, so i love that contrast. the “arc of water” stayed with me for a while too.

[pebblysand]

of tyres that blow (extended author’s note of chapter v. of castles)

- - TO READ THE CHAPTER ITSELF, CLICK HERE. - -

Oh, what a month it has been. Well, a month and two days - I’m a bit late updating. I’ve had two good things happen, writing wise. 1) I got my first original short story published (!!!!) (you can read it here) and 2) I put out a little one-shot about Fleur Delacour that I’m super happy about and gave me an idea about a new series (more on that later this week, I hope. I might need help with prompts!). Regardless, this latest Irish lockdown is fucking endless and I sometimes wonder if this fic isn’t just an outlet for my feelings of lockdown-induced loneliness, apathy, but also a constant argument that I have with myself thinking: for the love of god, just pull yourself up, will you? You’re a Gryffindor, goddamn it. I certainly wish my fucked up sleeping patterns on no one, although I may or may have Mary-Sued that onto Harry, lol. (Spoiler alert: he’s scheduled to get some real sleep in next chapter. All bets are off regarding whether I will.)

This chapter was surprisingly easy to write (I basically vomited out chapters iv, v, and vi over the span of a week in December) but incredibly difficult to edit. For days, I just couldn’t concentrate, wrote and re-wrote and felt like everything was shite. Then, I realised it’d become this 19,000-words long monster so I had to cut a lot of shit out. We ended up with 15,898 words which I suppose is better? 

I do wonder: do people mind long chapters? Like, I know as fanfic reader, I personally prefer longer formats and rarely gravitate towards works that are less than 3,000 words. I love just getting buried into a story, into plots rather than single scenes. This being said, every time I write something that I deem too long (i.e. above 10k) I have these excruciating struggles where I wonder: should I cut it in half? should I leave it as is? I decided to split the last one. Then, I decided not to split this one because (you may notice this or not, I’m not sure) it’s kind of built a certain way, geared towards basically getting to the last two paragraphs. Like, when you get there, it’s a bit of an ah-ha moment, but I couldn’t get to that ah-ha moment without all the build up before it. It’s the accumulation of all of these little details that feel like they don’t matter. And as Harry says in the end, they don’t, in the grand scheme of things, but also they do. Like, everyday life doesn’t matter until you lose it. Then, it does, if that makes sense.

In terms of next update... I’ve decided to get my law licence transferred to France and the EU (it’s a long story), which means that I need to bloody, fucking study. The exams are at the end of March so my current plan is: hardcore study until the end of february. Mix study/writing in early march and hopefully get chapter vi out mid-March, then hardcore study until the end of March. Please, if you see me posting then, tell me off in the comments cause god, I really need to pass. Now, I will go have my traditional i-ve-put-a-chapter-out shot of limoncello and let you read the below :).

...spoilers for castles, chap v. under the cut -

I’ve done a lot of thinking about what this chapter is meant to be about. Obviously (I hope), every chapter has a point, in this story. Chapter 1 is about time (the way it passes and blurs when your mind’s a complete mess), chapter 2 is about hope, chapter 3 is about inevitability and the consequences of trauma, chapter 4 is about becoming an adult and growing into your own skin, etc. I think this one is about fear. How you feel it, and how you overcome it. Like, Harry takes a decision to stand up, fight, do the interview, regardless of the fact that he is scared (for his life, for that of the people he loves), and finds buried inside him a lot of the courage that he (felt) he lost, after the war. He learns to control his fear of the world by figuring out how apprehend it, through the training Giulia gives him, through learning how to kill, too. 

But, it’s also about fear in society. How the attack on Robards sets everyone on edge and how they keep going regardless. I initially wrote this chapter with the idea that it was going to be about speaking out and being brave, but obviously, fear and fighting against it is a huge part of that, too. 

Then, there’s Mia. Obviously, this fic is Harry/Ginny endgame but I do like the idea of Harry (and possibly Ginny as well) dating at least one other person, before officially tying the knot. Like, yes, Ginny is obviously coming back next chapter. She’ll probably own the second half of next chapter, if I’m honest, considering they’re obviously going to the burrow for christmas. I love Ginny, I’ve missed her and honestly, I can’t wait to bring her back. This being said, to be fair, I’ve kind of realised that this fic may actually be the first I ever write that isn’t strictly “shippy.” Like, yes, their relationship is a huge part of it (it’s a huge part of his life) and it will and was always going to be a huge part of this story but I think this fic is larger than that. It’s a result of my years-long obsession over: but what happens next? Over what “all was well” really means, in a general sense. How do they get to “nineteen years later” and beyond. But yeah, I’ve missed Ginny and I’m glad she’s on her way back to us now. 

Now, obviously. Giulia. I’m sorry. This was always going to happen. Well, almost always. I remember when I first wrote her in, she was a bit of a filler character. At the time, the thing with Mia was supposed to happen in last chapter and I actually had (have) much more backstory around her, than around Giulia. She and Harry were going to have proper conversations (will they ever, who knows?), really get to know each other. But then, Giulia came first narratively and shone through the page. I started writing her and she had this personality and life of her own and I couldn’t bring myself to curtail her. 

Now, we all know how it is: fanfics can only tolerate so many OCs. So, I had to choose between putting Mia at the forefront, or Giulia. I chose Jules. 

Then, in chapter 4, I wrote this: 

Her first lesson is to teach him how to drive the patrol car. ‘I don’t know why we use them,’ she explains, honest, and Harry vaguely wonders if he should be taking notes. ‘Reckon the Ministry saw them being used by Muggles, had to prove they could do better. They like making noise, the Ministry, don’t they? Lots of sirens and shite.’

Politely, Harry hides a chuckle behind a cough. He clearly doesn’t know yet that he doesn’t need to, that Giulia’s sarcastic sense of humour is one of the things that he’ll come to appreciate the most in this world, over the next few months. That the sound of her voice is one he’ll try to never, ever forget. That in the speech that he’ll give when he makes Head Auror, over a decade later, he’ll think of her and say: ‘Okay, let’s try to not just be sirens and shite, all right?’

This kind of tumbled out without me really thinking about it until I really looked at it and thought: fuck, why is he talking about her past tense, like that. Like “the sound of her voice is one he’ll try to never, ever forget.” Why would he forget it, though? And so, just like that, came her death sentence. For that, I apologise. It killed me too, and I cried when I wrote it in (especially when I wrote next chapter, actually, first time I ever made myself cry writing, if I’m honest) but it just needed to happen. It’s how Ginny and he get back together (I mean, obviously - is that even a spoil) because he’s grieving but she’s grown stronger and steady and she’s able to be there in a way that she wasn’t last summer. It did occur to me that god, all his mentors/father figures come to die, don’t they? But honestly, I kind of thing that his real mentor will be Robards, at the end of the day. She was just the one who allowed him to get back on his feet. 

One last note: I’ve been meaning to put this into the fic for ages but have never found the right moment to write it in. In the meantime, I’ll just say it here, because I don’t know if this has frustrated some of yous - I know it might have driven me mad. There is a logic to the Muggle/Wizard swearing/exclamations in the fic. Obviously, this is an adult fic so they swear normally, like eighteen-year-olds would in this (I decided that very early on), but also there’s “God”-s and “Merlin”-s and things like that. 

Now, I think that throughout this fic, although Harry hasn’t mentioned it yet (cause it never fucking fits anywhere) Hermione’s been having a sort of Muggle reckoning. She - in conscience - decides to start swearing/exclaiming “like a Muggle” after the war. If you notice, she only ever says “god”, never “Merlin.” Harry uses both interchangeably although he tends to use Merlin more when he thinks about wizard stuff, but God when he thinks about Muggle stuff (like when he’s with Mia). Ron only swears in “wizard” but I think he might start using Muggle expletives as well in the later chapters because of Hermione rubbing off on him. 

The fact that I even think about all that stuff is pathetic and I need to get a life. But that’s for another post, altogether. 

Anyway, thanks for reading. I hope you liked it :). 

[sugrx]

1, 16 and 24

1. what did you learn about yourself this year?

i’ve obv changed a little bit and definitely have COMPLETELY different interests this year,,,, like if my last year self saw me now they would be like ‘wtf is dream smp oh my god you got into minecraft again didn’t you i thought i had finally moved past this phase when i was 9 YEARS OLD WHAT ARE YOU DOING PUT DOWN THE PEN STOP MAKING MINECRAFT FANAR--”

also i think i’ve gotten a bit better grasp on my sexuality/gender?? (that's explained more in the next question) and i feel like my art has DARASTICALLY improved like look at my last year art look at it i didn’t even know how to make .png files if i saw my current art style last year i would CRY OF JOY 

but my artistic eye has rlly developed since then tho and even though if i could draw as well as i could this year last year i would be over the moon now i just,,,, i see things i really want to change?? and my inspiration artists are so much beTTER THEN mE?? how do i be as good as thEM??? MY ART BELONGS IN TR ASH??

i was rlly anxious this year about my writing bc i haven’t been doing it as often and i feel like i SHOULD bc art is just a hobby and my main aspiration is writing and literally i feel like i haven’t improved at all since last year literally i looked at a piece i wrote last year and i haven’t improved at all,,, i feel like in general my stories have gotten better but not my general writing abilities?? like,,, last year i had this one story i planned to write that i really liked but i’ve basically scrapped it now and i have like 3 different stories i have going that im in love with but haven’t touched in weeks bc i’ve been so distrACTED

my self-image has also become a little,,, less?? this year?? i think??? idk if its just been the general mood of this year bc it sucked for everybody but im definitely not as excited and confident as i was last year

16. did you learn anything about your sexuality this year?

yeS?? NO?? MAYBE??? YES???

i mean i was questioning last year and im still questioning this year but,,, i’ve kinda thought about it more?? last year i was like completely clueless but i think now i have a vague sense of direction?? somewhat??

ive only had one crush ever when i was in kindergarten and that's not a lot of information to go off but it was a boy so i know i like boys,,, but also at the same time?? i could imagine liking a girl?? but I've never actually had any romantic feelings towards a girl yet so im not going to officially label myself bisexual or pansexual or anything so im sticking to questioning until i've had more romantic experience bUT that’s still something

i’ve also thought about my gender a lil bit?? it’s not something i’ve been super concerned with up until now but idk i haven’t been,,, feeling good abt it?? bc im growing up and my body is getting more “feminine” and it’s been making me uncomfortable??? like not to the point where i absolutely despise my body but like,,, a vague sense of uncomfortableness whenever i look at myself without like 4565492834589 sweaters blocking the shape of my body LOL

like,,, i could imagine being a boy and sometimes i want to be a boy but at the same time,,, there’s some things i rlly like abt being a girl that i wouldn’t want to get rid of entirely?? is there a sexuality for being both a boy and girl???????? idk,,, i’ve been debating if im gender fluid, since sometimes i would prefer if i was a boy and other times i like being a girl,,, but i haven’t done enough research into it so im sticking to she/her pronouns for now, plus this is all kinda vague speculation

 so basically nothing’s changed with my gender/sexuality other then i’ve thought abt it more and have more of a vague concept of it

24. who has made the biggest impact in your life this year?

i feel like there hasn't rlly been a single person in particular who has affected my life this year? this year has definitely not been my best (probably one of my worst actually) not just bc of the pandemic but idk i felt like i was drifting away from my friends but couldn’t muster up the courage to do anything abt it??? but nearing the end of the year things have been getting somewhat better with that

i got tumblr this year and managed to become more active with some friends who i felt like i was loosing touch with (like luvu and dan!) and that definitely had a positive impact!! but i feel like if anything shows/fandoms/fictional universes made more impact on me this year then anything?? idk whenever i’m stressed i usually fallback on fictional media bc i love consuming storytelling content,,,, i probably focus more on other’s fictional worlds then my own LMAO 

my interests have shifted a lot this year but i feel like my comfort fictional characters and current favorite shows rlly helped me get through this year!

namely a few fandoms that have really made an impact were sander sides, dream smp, the owl house, etc..! i RLLY got into sander sides near the beginning of the year and rn near the end of the year im RLLY into dream smp (as you can tell) but even if i don’t post as obsessively about one fandom doesn’t mean i still don’t love it and it made a significant impact on my life!! i feel like every fictional universe i’ve been into has affected me just as a whole in some way and i’ve definitely subconsciously weaven aspects of them into my own stories! not to mention i’ve been rlly getting into some of my friend’s fictional universes lately and i have been DYING over them and they’re so underrated and inspire me so much!! namely the 4 queens story  (@luvuwite‘s), a NUMBER of @raventherobot‘s stories (im simp for vin’s story and also kayne and also EVERYBODYAJKSJKSJKADJK) and also i love @hypnoticcdan‘s oc viper and i dont know a lot about their story yet but i am LEARNING also horizon is baby we stan,,,,

[mousehole5000]

more tgcf chapters 143-173 lets goooooo

PEI MING BOO HISS except actually okay he’s mostly funny i think but still boo hiss

“hey who’s this guy who’s really pissed at you?” “oh thats my sword. i broke it.” alright then!

i think i need to go back and reread the banyue pass arc bc im still confused as to whats going on with banyue and pei su

“Banyue dropped from the sky with two pots raised. Without a word, she plummeted with the mouths of the pots facing down, trapping and detaining the shocked Ming’guang and the roaring Ke Mo within.” - THATS MY GIRL

“It must be known that, to heavenly officials, it certainly was more than natural for kingdoms of the mortal realm to fight and annihilate one another; the acts of these plays progressing on endlessly. But when it came their own turn, it was often hard to let things go. If one must stand in the same court as the one who annihilated their own kingdom, and that man cavorted in the heavens, exceedingly flashy, then it must be vexing.” - hmmmm!!

“I’ve spoken too many words in this lifetime. What are you referring to?” - okay to be fair thats a mood

okay its nice to get some pei ming backstory and its funny that he and xie lian are bonding but also still whenever pei ming interacts with a female character my hackles rise like a cat lol

“Xie Lian watched as Banyue thought really hard before cheerfully pulling out a few long, wine-red scorpion-snakes, and putting them into the bubbling pot.” - THATS MY GIRL

“Although “smell” was something colourless and formless, the instant Banyue removed the pot cover, it was as if some mysterious physical object had twisted all the air around the mouth of that pot. The group stared at the sight within the pot for a long time. Their pupils reflected an endless, bottomless darkness; like it could pull them into the abyss. No words could describe the sentiment expressed within their eyes. A moment later, Xie Lian patted Banyue’s shoulder and gave a thumbs-up.” - like father-figure like daughter-figure. amazing.

“However, what if one day mortals discovered something completely new that ran faster than horses? Then, when this new invention overtook horses, worshippers of this heavenly official who controlled horses would inevitably decrease. Such heavenly officials, flashing by like shooting stars, made up the majority of the heavens.” - obsessed with this, genuinely. life and change. worship and its purpose. my religious studies diploma on my wall is screaming at me rn. ALSO i am once again thinking about celebrities

“...” It was only then that Pei Ming seemed to notice, and started to contemplate this question. A moment later, he answered, “A habit. In a dark, creepy place like this, isn’t it normal to hold women in your arms, to comfort them and calm their fears?” “I’m sorry, but I wasn’t scared,” Banyue said.” - BANYUE I LOVE YOU. I MISSED YOU SO MUCH. god this takes me back to every college party i ever went to

LING WEN BACKSTORY????? shoeseller chosen for godhood bc she wrote a political essay and got arrested...... and now she’s face to face with the official who appointed her..... do go on.....

“Ling Wen laughed out loud, seeming to be enraged, and her voice dropped. “Very well! You said I couldn’t reach that high. Then, might I ask you: had the prominence of the Palace of Jing Wen at its peak ever reached even the knees of my Palace of Ling Wen??” - GET HIM!!!! BOO HISS JING WEN

“Compared to you, I’m not that bad,” Ling Wen said. “You’d personally order me to stay in the Palace of Jing Wen until midnight, then turn around and say I shamelessly hang around ‘til late to harass you. Words murder without form; I was much nicer responding with blatant violence.” - ling wen im love you..... also this bit... feels Real

BLOOD RAIN BLOOD RAIN BLOOD RAIN!! FLOWER PETALS TRANSFORMATION!!! see hua cheng? look as how cool it can be when you leave the story for a little while!! bc then you get to return and make an entrance!!

“Not only can you bring forth bloody rain, you can also make flowers shower. I didn’t know that. How fun!” - cute!! and in that moment we were all xie lian

“Everyone was stunned by his deed, and Ling Wen arduously gave him a thumbs-up. ”Ol’ Pei, what a man!” Pei Ming gritted his teeth. “WELCOME!” - aww three two tumors buddies!!

okay yin yu is here and xie lian did the equivalent of asking someone when the baby is due only to find out theyre not pregnant at all. then rong guang taunts yin yu and no one says anything. i do love the amount of awkward moments in this book tbh sometimes there are no words.

“All around was sand and mud crushing at him, exceedingly suffocating. The sand and mud was also moving endlessly; the feeling was like he was swallowed into the stomach of a giant monster, and that monster had also eaten a bunch of other things besides him, tumbling everything in its stomach, trying to digest” - ooooh creepy!!! the red string thing... is cute.... also xie lian being able to see hua cheng’s butterfly vision by looking directly into his eye is kinda cool. and obviously homoerotic.

“Are lower-ranked heavenly officials below other people?” Quan Yizhen asked. “No,” Yin Yu replied. Were they not? It was obvious that he himself didn’t believe in his own words, and Quan Yizhen also noticed. A good while later, he said bluntly, “I don’t like it here.” Yin Yu said nothing.” - im having emotions. and then yin yu also saying he doesnt like it there either.... also idk how this scene is going to play out but as much as im enjoying quan yizhen being an icon i can also possibly see how yin yu could eventually get to the point of “i am tired of being nice. i do just want to go apeshit” even if he really cares about qyz. it happens </3

“Indeed,” Hua Cheng said. “Half a year later when Quan Yizhen actually ascends, he won’t find it so funny anymore.” “Can we watch that part too?” Xie Lian asked. “We can. Hold on,” Hua Cheng replied.” - quan yizhen king of taking things literally. also why did this turn into hualian having a movie night

jian yu seems like the kind of asshole who would purposely give someone regular soda when they specifically asked for diet soda. god yin yu is really having a bad day i really feel for him in the whole situation with the brocade immortal

awww okay at least jian yu tried to take responsibility. im still mad at him tho that was objectively a terrible idea. god this whole situation sucked :(

“Rocks and earth crushed at them from all around, forcing their bodies to press tightly against one another, their faces brushing, their ears warm. Although it wasn’t the right time, a thought flashed through Xie Lian’s mind: “‘To die buried together’ doesn’t feel so bad.” - okay... im kind of emotional.... gay people....

okay obviously these murals and the prince of wuyong have some connection (im guessing pretty direct) to xie lian and are important but everytime they start analyzing one i feel like im back in art history class fhadskfhskjdhf not that thats a bad thing!! i liked art history a lot tbh

“Don’t worry, they’re not human,” Hua Cheng said. “It’s precisely because they’re not human that we have to worry, alright….” Xie Lian thought.” - goth ghost bf problems

xie lian: well, there is one person i trust more than anyone else, someone who’s first in my mind hua cheng, oblivious: oh :/ xie lian, also oblivious: what? hua cheng: you shouldnt trust so easily its dangerous xie lian: oh. haha. yeah. well. wanna,,, know who it is? hua cheng: its :) fine :) it :) doesnt :) matter :) but of course you can tell me if you want to gege xie lian, internally: well now ive made it weird hua cheng, 5 minutes later: actually i need you to tell me. right now. its totally for your security me: gay people smh

“As they suspected, he had been captured by Qi Rong. Although no one was bound by ropes, there were balls of greasily green ghost fires hovering over every one of their heads.” - completely off track but anybody else remember the great green globs of greasy grimy gopher guts song

“Could there actually come a day when Qi Rong was embarrassed that someone might see the manner in which he ate? Before Xuan Ji entered, she put Guzi down. Guzi, ta-ta-ta, ran in, rushing straight to Qi Rong’s side. But when he saw him, he pointed his finger. He cried, “Dad is eating bad things in secret again!” “I’m not!” Qi Rong retaliated.” SCREAM IS QI RONG LEARNING THE POWER OF LOVE NOOOO also god that poor man whose body he has im starting to doubt if he’ll ever be free jimmy novak flashbacks

everytime we get another ghost king power somewhere someone should be writing hua cheng the cyborg bf in a high tech futuristic au i think thats the only other potential setting that could truly capture this wild ride

“In truth, throughout history, there was no man in the world who didn’t love bragging. A breeze could blow the handkerchief of a brothel girl into a man’s hand, and he would turn around and say the most beautiful of renowned escorts had fallen in love with him; holding shoes and wiping benches for the emperor’s mistress’s uncle’s grandson’s cousin’s mistress would for sure become him being an important administrator at the residence of royal relatives, raising his status. Thus, men who didn’t brag were a rare species.” - SCREAM this is going in my favorite tgcf quotes folder god... mxtx come here let me shake your hand

read the story of rain master yushi huang’s ascension. why am i crying. also this bit im crying again me with my stuffed animals “Thus, while Yushi Huang was cultivating at the Temple of Yulong, every time when she went to seek water and passed that door, she would rub the head of that ox. The door knocker soaked in her essence of life, and when the Rain Master ascended, the ox ascended with her.”

okay thats enough for now i have 7 more chapters to book 4!!! woo!!!

[jiyeong]

bmblb flowershop au

been CRAVING this for weeks so i wrote one on twitter and im gonna do a post here too so i don’t lose it in my 43k tweets in case i ever do anything more with it (’: but here’s my bee flowershop au pls enjoy. it’s set in late spring/early summer

yang, age 18 and freshly out of highschool, gets her driver’s license and immediately asks for a motorcycle. taiyang gives her the keys to the family minivan instead and tells her if she wants a deathmobile, she can get a job and buy it herself

she’s walking down the main shopping street looking for job opportunities when she sees a cute girl putting up a “help wanted” sign outside a flowershop. it’s blake. the cute girl is blake.

it’s a delivery job and she applies immediately and gets it mostly because she’s the only one who applied, but ironically also because the minivan is big enough to hold large bouquets, has a 5star safety rating, and also does not go faster than 35mph so its extremely unlikely that she will be in any accidents lol

blake’s family’s shop is very popular, and they do a lot of weddings and big events. it’s an on-call job and she gets called in maybe once or twice a week. it’s always blake calling her in, and they always have a nice chat before she has to go deliver the flowers

she finds out blake is the owner’s only daughter, so she’s probably off limits so like ok. disappointing but whatever it’s easy money and she gets to talk to a hot girl every time she goes to work so this is fine

but then she starts getting some really weird deliveries...

the first one is to a wrestling tournament at some prep school. it’s for a boy (sun wukong, the delivery slip says) who giggles like a little schoolgirl as soon as he sees her coming with the flowers, and before he’ll sign for the delivery, starts talking to her about sports and her workout routines, etc

he’s a nice guy, they talk for a bit, and she asks if he got the flowers because he won and he says no, it’s the nationals and he made third place. the whole time he’s grinning like it’s some kind of inside joke, so that’s what she figures it is.

when she goes back to the flowershop, she tells blake about it, about how weird it was delivering to a wrestling tourney of all things- and she’s laughing too.

yang mentions looking at the delivery slip and that she’s never heard of the flowers before. this gets blake GOING.

she tells her that they’re ranunculus flowers, more commonly known as buttercups in some other flowershops, and that they symbolize attraction, that you find someone charming.

“huh. guess he has some big fan out there,” yang laughs.

“yeah,” blake smiles softly, “guess so.”

the second time it happens, it’s a delivery to some small town fashion magazine publisher. this time, blake mentions the flowers before yang leaves.

it is a mixture of carnations,lilies, and white orchids, and they all symbolize, to some degree, beauty. yang supposes it’s fitting considering she’s going to a fashion magazine, i guess??? this makes blake laugh a bit. yang thinks her laugh is really very cute.

the flowers are for a velvet scarlatina. yang notices her fidgeting as she drops them off in her office. it’s not a nervous fidget, more like she’s excited but is a bit too shy to say and doesn’t know how to express it, maybe?

so yang asks. velvet’s surprised by the question, but she smiles and tells her anyways. she’s just been promoted to lead photographer, she’ll have an entire photo editing department to lead starting tomorrow, and it’s probably the biggest thing that’s ever happened to her. it’s exciting! she’s excited! yang congratulates her, she’s genuinely happy for this girl. she seems like a hard worker.

as yang turns to leave, velvet stops her, holds up a camera slowly, and softly asks if she can take yang’s picture. to test out her new lens, she adds.

it’s a little weird, but okay; artsy people are always weird, yang’s smokin hot on a normal day, AND she’s having an incredible hair day today, if she does say so herself. so she agrees. before she leaves, velvet hands her a small rabbit’s foot, “for good luck.”

this time, yang tells both blake and ruby/weiss about it. blake seems amused, but doesn’t say much, and ruby immediately demands to see the rabbit’s foot charm.

while ruby is occupied by the charm, weiss asks yang how her new job is going. yang gets stuck talking about blake, how cute she is and how smart she is and how nice she is. her smile and her face and her voice.

at this point even ruby’s tuned back in.

so, they do what any good sister/sister’s weirdly obsessive girlfriend would do. they tag along the next time she gets called in to work.

ruby and weiss immediately drift to a section of shop on their own, distracted. ruby’s picking out a bouquet of roses for weiss (ugh, yang thinks) as yang walks to the counter where blake sits. this time the bouquet is simple, made of only one flower: gardenias.

“it symbolizes purity and love,” blake tells her.

“wow i feel like 90% of these flowers symbolize purity and love,” yang jokes. it makes blake chuckle, so very softly, and yang feels like a hammer has dropped in her chest. love. oh no.

“probably accurate. gardenias though, if you were wishing to send someone your undying love anonymously, you would send them gardenias,” blake muses, eyes drifting over to ruby and weiss making a fuss in the corner. “it’s a symbol for a secret love.”

yang’s head is screaming. oh no.

yang ends up leaving (ditching) ruby and weiss there with blake.

the flowers are being sent to the same prep school as the wrestling tournament, but instead of the gym she’s headed for the locker rooms. there’s a sign for a track meet today, and the flowers are for an ilia amitola, some star on the team, yang guesses, as she walks through the school.

ilia is the only one still in there, and yang senses the hostility immediately.

ilia absolutely GRILLS her, there’s no other way to describe it. she asks her question after question about her tastes, her hobbies, her personal life. it’s a little intimidating, and yang is still sort of distracted from her revelation at the flowershop (oh nO) so she answers them all.

ilia’s quiet for a bit at the end before signing the slip and letting yang go.

“don’t fuck it up,” she says as yang’s leaving the room. what the hell???

when she gets home she immediately storms into ruby’s room.

“i think im in love with her,” she’s freaking out. pacing. weiss is in there too, because of course she is, and they’re both just staring at her blankly.

apparently, it was obvious.

“I don’t know why you’re freaking out,” weiss huffs. “when was the last time you dated a girl? like, actually, with feelings??”

“shut UP weiss you’re not invited to this conversation. ruby, sweet ruby, my wonderful adorable baby sister with a strange addiction to model guns and extremely violent shooting games, how the fuck do i get over the cute flower girl that makes me feel like i want to bash my head against the concrete??”

“uhhh well, for one, i think weiss has great ideas so im re-inviting her into the conversation. (”thank you,” weiss huffs, because she was raised to be polite even while offended) and two, just, like, uhhh don’t???”

they convince yang to confess to blake. but yang’s like ok it’s been a while since ive had actual, swear-to-god, feelings, so she wants to do something ROMANTIC. something BIG. something GAY.

yang’s saved up a nice chunk of cash from her job - and okay, who needs a motorcycle when you could get a girlfriend? and like, okay, blake works at the shop, so she’s not quite sure if flowers are an appropriate idea, but she’s literally always reading books on flower meanings and flower dictionaries and looking at natgeo magazines etc so she watches shia lebeouf’s just do it video and why the hell not

but she has to do it right - and she asks the only flower experts she knows other than blake. blake’s parents. she wants to get their okay as well anyways - she’d quit if she had to - so it’s like two birds one stone. but yang’s been charming them since her interview, and they’re almost strangely enthusiastic about helping set up their only daughter.

she gets weiss to place the order, because ruby can’t stop giggling on the phone. it’s a HUGE bouquet - full of every flower that symbolizes love that mr & mrs belladonna recommended her. it’s almost embarrassing listening to weiss list the flowers and knowing that blake is the one receiving the order.

the bouquet is so huge that yang insists that she needs help carrying it. conveniently, ruby and weiss are busy doing something gay, so they aren’t free to help her. blake raises her eyebrow when her parents send her off with yang to help. yang thinks it’s very attractive.

the address is a meadow right on the outskirts of town. lots of rolling hills, lots of swaying trees, the sky is clear and you can already see the moon even though it isn’t nighttime yet. it’s all very scenic, a perfect wedding venue. it’s late afternoon when they leave the shop.

“preparing for a wedding so late in the day is so strange,” blake comments on the way there, playing with the radio stations like she owns the van. it makes yang’s heart clench. can you die early from too much feeling? how awful. “what eccentric people, to be having their ceremony so late at night.”

“aha... y-yeah, eccentric people for sure,” yang sweats.

they park on the hill, and there’s no one there. blake steps out of the van, confused. she’s looking at the sunset and it’s as picture perfect as she thought it would be, but where is everyone?

and when she turns around, yang is holding the very large bouquet perfectly fine on her own. she almost shoves it into blake’s face.

“they’re for you,” yang blurts out immediately. “i’m the eccentric people.”

blake’s all ??? for a second. and then it sinks in and she’s laughing because, “do you know how much these flowers cost? did you literally spend all your money on a bouquet of flowers for me, a florist’s daughter who is literally around flowers all day?”

turns out blake has also been spending her money on bouquets for all of her friends uncharacteristically often, with their consent of course, just to get the cute new delivery girl into the store more so she could see her and maybe have a chat. they’ve been returning the flowers with small favors of their own - non-consensual blake makes sure to point out - namely, yang’s favorite workout spots, some really cute not-at-all-candid pictures of yang, and what basically amounted to, yup u guessed it, an entire autobiography of yang herself. god.

they kiss as the sun’s last rays are fading, laughing, on a hill almost an hour’s drive away in a rusty old minivan, and over a ridiculously unnecessary amount of flowers. it’s pretty fuckin gay.