#its the xenophobia/ableism thats why they did it

[kideternity]

Never gonna forgive DC for taking Count Vertigo, a well-written, pretty morally gray, suicidal and disabled character, whose disability was treated seriously, and then spontaneously deciding he was just completely irredeemably powerhungry and evil now

[bloodyke]

ive tried to make this post many times before but it always gets jumbled up in my head and words become a toddler's messy fingerpainting and it all sound wrong and im probably going to delete this immediately after posting it, but ive been thinking lately about the special kind of grief that losing the accent from your home brings about. its a kind of loss that cuts really deep in a way that's hard to talk about because there isn't anything tangible that is gone, your home town is still there, you can go visit anytime, you still have all the memories and the traditions, the people are all the same, but YOU are not. you know all the slang and the turns of phrases but it all comes out wrong now. you no longer fit in, and maybe you never did fit in the first place, thats why you left isnt it? no matter, its still painful to constantly hear 'i never wouldve guessed, you dont sound like it' everytime you open your mouth

its especially hard when, on some level you did it on purpose, because of the combined force of ableism classism and xenophobia convinced you that there is a "correct" way to speak and if you have "precise" diction and "proper" grammer people will praise and love you for it, maybe this time if i speak in this way they will finally understand me, and they did, for a little while, then they hated you for being Other, for thinking you're Better Than Them you're so Pretentious and Condescending, but you don't think that and you never did. I am proud of being puerto rican and i am proud of being from the south. i love my homes, both the one i grew up in, and the one i never got to see aside from secondhand memories passed on from my mother and her family

and these accents DO come out sometimes so i know its not truely irrevocably gone, but those times are far and few between and only come out in times of great emotion so its not the same to me. and know i can just go and relearn the accents but it feels forced, inauthentic, like im trying too hard when i should just Be Able To Do It. idk where im going with this but i just feel like something important was taken from me, like all those stories of the protagonist who can never really go back home anymore and it makes me sad