#its so tempting to go back into a bad relationship because at least i knew they'd always be there every day

[oddogoblino]

Everyone always seems more willing to talk and exist when I'm not around. The sleep deprivation makes me want to believe this means I'm a smothering presence rather than considering maybe everyone just finally had more free time. If the bad thoughts are right though, I guess I have no qualms against disappearing since youtube exists for entertainment.

[thebigqueer]

2 years ago i fucked up a friendship w a girl (that im pretty sure i was in love with). to this day i think of her and sometimes when i see her on the street i just wanna cry. i understand your plight very much.

yeahhh man im sorry to hear that!!! it genuinely fucking sucks and i would never wish this upon anyone. cuz like it makes you fully think about all the what ifs and i genuilnely dont think ill ever find someone like her again

[cevansbrat0007]

The Lonely Hearts Club: Part One

Summary: You decide to press pause on your relationship with Andrew Barber. Too bad your hotshot attorney of an ex-boyfriend doesn't understand the meaning of the word. Takes place directly after the events in Photo Shoot Faux Pas. Read Part Two!

Warnings: Angst, Break-ups, Cursing, Andy Being a Menace, Insecure Reader, Eventual Smut, Manhandling, Punishments, Minors DNI

A/N: Happy Valentine's Day! This multi-part fic will feature a combination of requests from the likes of @writer84, @lexivass, @moejdaw, as well as several other anonymous readers. Part of my ongoing Growing Pains Series. All mistakes are my own. Likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated.

___

“Come on, girl. You can do this.”

“Yeah, but maybe…” You trail off as you approach Andy’s front door. Fishing the key out of your pocket, you insert it into the lock. Thanks to your shaking hands, it actually takes a few seconds longer than it probably should. “Maybe I oughta wait.”

“Babe.” Your friend blows out a breath, the noise coming across the other line like static. “We’ve been over this like a dozen times already. Today is just another day; it’s no different from any other.” 

Your friends had been quick to remind you that Valentine’s Day didn’t really matter. At its core, it was nothing more than a cheap gimmick big corporations used to upsell mediocre chocolate and subpar rom-coms. Right?

“I know, I know.” There really wasn’t much more you could say beyond that. Not after the two of you had painstakingly broken down every detail of this very scenario just last night. During which time you also managed to consume several bottles of wine. 

You’d been all up in your feelings from the moment you’d arrived at your best friend’s house. And Sara had spent a good hour sitting with you on her living room floor, gently rocking you back and forth while you quietly sobbed into her sweater. 

Andy hated it when you cried. But when you did, he was always so good at using his big body to comfort you – to calm you down. He’d been the one that you’d really wanted last night. You’d been so tempted to call him, even before the alcohol had started flowing. 

However, all your girls had said “no”. And when they couldn’t get you to listen to reason, they’d instructed Sara to remove the temptation by swiping your phone and hiding it away. At the time you’d been highly upset. But now you were grateful for their interference. Because this was something you had to do. 

Provided that you could make yourself stick with the fucking plan.

“Are you in yet?” Sara asks, her voice briefly snapping you back into the present.

“I am. I–I’m just gonna leave it on the table. Along with the muffins.” Squeezing your eyes shut, you brace for the sound you’re pretty sure is about to viciously assault your eardrums in three…two…one…

Here it comes.

“YOU BOUGHT HIM FUCKING MUFFINS?!” She screeches, her tone rife with stunned exasperation. “Are you being serious right now?!”

Yes, you did that. It didn’t seem right to just drop the note and run. At least not without leaving a little something else to go with it, apparently in the form of cinnamon spice crunch.

“Don’t judge me, bitch. This shit is hard enough as it is.” You growl into the receiver, setting the box of delicious smelling baked goods onto his kitchen counter. “I just wanna make sure he has something to tide him over until we – until we, um…” Gripping the edge of a chair, you force yourself to take a series of deep breaths.

“Shit, Y/N, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, baby.” Your friend immediately backpedals. But it doesn’t matter. It’s not like you can hear her anyway over the sound of the distant roaring in your ears. “I know this is hard, honey. But you’ve got to pull it together.” 

This whole thing was making you feel ill. 

Fuck! Like it or not, she was right. The last thing you wanted to do was start crying again. Because you knew if you allowed yourself to break down here, it would be impossible to stop. And that’s exactly where you could not afford to let Andrew Stephen Barber to find you right now.

Standing in the middle of his kitchen, openly crying. Desperately wanting to be held by the one man who had the power to shatter you into a million glittering pieces with nothing more than a simple touch.

And while that might seem a bit dramatic, it also didn’t make it any less true. Which meant that you needed to get out there, fast. You couldn’t allow yourself to forget that you really did have somewhere else to be. Standing up straight, you tuck Andy’s house key into the folded up piece of paper and then place it on top of the muffins.

Time to go. 

Turning on your heel, you make a beeline for the exit. Hopefully you’d feel better once you were on the road. As you leave, you make a mental note to worry about everything else later. Until then, you just had to focus on the now.    

“Fuck!” You hiss as the door slams closed behind you. 

“What? Is Andy home? Did he –” You cut her off, feeling frustrated even as the sickly-sweet taste of regret threatens to claw its way up your throat. 

“No. I just forgot to grab that stupid fucking album is all.” With a huff, you jog over to your car. “And it’s not like I can go back in for it or anything since I left him his key. Fuuuuck!” You close the driver’s side door before turning on your vehicle and putting it in gear.

“Girl, who gives a shit!” Sara snorts, clearly relieved that your activities weren’t interrupted. “Look at it this way, whether you like it or not, you just gave that ungrateful bastard something to remember you by.”

Good point, Sara. That’s exactly why she had been designated as your emotional support person for this entire emotionally draining escape. 

“True.” Time to focus on the road. If traffic cooperated, you had just enough time to get yourself to your next destination without risking getting a ticket.

Not that that mattered much anymore. The days of anyone giving a shit about your potentially reckless activities were most likely a thing of the past. Oh well. You looked forward to no longer having to stock up on aloe. Yeah, the price of that stock was about to go way down. 

A tiny giggle bubbles up, escaping before you can stop it. 

“Are you okay, Y/N? I know that was rough back there, but I really think you did the right thing. Plus, I’ve been updating everyone on the group chat, and they all agree.” You resolve to check the thread later so that you can provide everyone with an update.

See that Andy Bear? This whole damned thing had been workshopped from start to finish. You can’t possibly accuse me of being impulsive now. You let out another burst of laughter, this one sounding a touch more hysterical than the last.  

“Also, Rhea really wants to know where you got those friggin’ muffins…”

“Tell her I’ll message her with the name of the bakery later.” You merge onto the highway as you head towards downtown. “Thanks for all your help today, Sara. Couldn’t have done it without you girls.”

“Hey boo – you know we love Andy’s fine ass. We just happen to love your ass a hell of a lot more. Now drive safe and text us when you land.” You know she’s telling the truth. All of your girls were pretty darn fond of your man, but you were their girl first. And their loyalty was to you.

Something for which you were exceedingly grateful.

“You got it – talk soon.” 

You end the call before settling in for the remainder of the drive. Not wanting to be alone with your thoughts, you quickly decide to turn on the radio – only to be surprised when Mariah Carey’s “We Belong Together” begins playing over the speakers.

“Wow.” You whisper with a shake of your head. “That is so not fair.”

Sometimes the gods possessed a real fucked up sense of humor.

Your bottom lip quivers as the lyrics hit home, hot tears blurring your vision. You let out an audible sniffle before dashing at them with your sleeve. But you don’t change the station. And you no longer try to stem the flow. Instead you finally give yourself over to the pain that was your heart breaking – piece by piece.

You’d talk to Andy in a couple of weeks. He’d give you space. He’d give you time. And if he didn’t want to work things out when it was all said and done…then you would have to find a way to live without him. And you would find a way.

But first, you had a plane to catch. And then you were gonna get yourself a margarita and – no – scratch that.

Make that a bottle of tequila.   

___

Five hours later…

Andy shoulders his way into his house from the garage, absentmindedly toeing off his shoes as he sorts through his mail. 

Bill. Bill. Junk. A Postcard from his Dentist. Another bill. And more junk.

With a grunt, he tosses the stack of unwanted papers onto the table. And then he spies the pink box resting on the counter. A smile curves its way across his handsome lips when he realizes that you must’ve stopped by at some point during the day. 

But he does find it rather odd that you wouldn’t have let him know. Sure, it was Valentine’s Day, but the two of you weren’t supposed to get together until this weekend. 

Still smiling, Andy makes his way over to the box of treats, humming a little tune as he goes. While he had a feeling something was going on with you lately, he’d simply chalked it up to stress. But he also knew that once he got you in his bed and settled himself between those gorgeous thighs, it was only a matter of time before he’d have you speaking in tongues…

Which would hopefully lead to you spilling your pretty little guts. So that he could finally try to fix whatever it was that kept making you seem so sad.  

He picks up the note, his head tilting to the side as he tries to make sense of the meaning behind your interesting dessert choice. Confused, he decides to read your message. With a sigh, he unfolds the piece of paper. Only to be caught off guard when a key falls out and onto the surface below, the sharp clatter making him jump.

“What the fuck?” He snarls as his eyes quickly scan the tear-stained piece of paper. “No. Oh no, baby girl…fuck no…” 

He could not fucking believe what he was reading. 

Andrew grips the edge of the counter as his legs threaten to give out underneath him. However, it’s not until the fourth reread that it all finally clicks into place.

You'd just tried to break-up with him. On fucking Valentine’s Day of all fucking days. But if you thought that leaving him a “Dear John” letter and a box of muffins before running off to god-knows-where was going to be the end of it, then well…the joke was on you. Because there was no way in hell he was ready to let you go. At least not without one hell of fight. 

"Alright." A dark chuckle escapes as he crumples the note in fist. Part of him wished that he still carried a lighter so that he could go outside and burn your fucking letter. “But make no mistake, sweetness, we’re not done here.”

However, Andrew Barber could be patient until he saw you again. He’d give you a couple days to get your mind right. But when he found you – and he would – he wasn’t going to stop until he had you back in his life and in his bed, right where you fucking belonged. 

You could count on that shit.

END

[im-not-a-l0ser]

Another Ongoing Fic That I Need People To Encourage Me To Finish

5+1 Secret Relationship Michie Edition

This is much shorter than some of my others, but this chapter is complete in of itself.

1- Jason and Kyle

It was no surprise that Jason and Kyle were the first two to figure out that there was something going on. They didn’t get it outright, but they did know that something suspicious was going on. 

Kyle was the first to realise. 

“Hey, look, it’s Shit-Lips. Been a minute since he’s—”

“We should probably get to class,” Max said. “C’mon, I don’t want you two flunkin’ off the football team cuz your grades slip!” He said. He slapped them both in the back of the head before marching off. 

“Dude, that keeps happening!” Kyle said, even as he began to walk to his first period class with Jason. 

“What keeps happening?” Jason asked. 

“Max keeps changing the subject whenever we bring up Richie! Anything about him, not even going to bully him, just straight gossip,” Kyle said. Jason shrugged.

“I dunno,” He said, “I’m not gonna look a gift horse in the mouth. I’m glad Richie’s gotten away from it all. He really helped me pass geometry.” 

It was true, Richie was the main reason that Jason didn’t have to retake the class. Ever since then, Jason had a soft spot for Richie. Not enough of one to keep Max from bullying him, but enough to not want to bully him. 

“Max never does that shit though,” Kyle said. “Pete and Steph are straight-up dating, and he still hasn’t given Pete a not-nerd pass.”

“Max hasn’t said Richie isn’t a nerd,” Jason said, “He’s just stopped bullying him. And maybe it’s because Pete and Steph are dating. He hasn’t bullied Pete and Ruth since they started, or at least as much.”

“Eh, Ruth doesn’t count,” Kyle said, waving him off. “We stopped bullying her often in the eighth grade when she moaned after he insulted her.” Jason shuttered. “But Richie’s always been Max’s favourite victim! For three years straight, he said his name nearly every day we saw him! And, what? Now he’s suddenly moved on from that? Nuh-uh, not Max, he’s too much of a stubborn bastard.”

“If I hear anything,” Jason conceded, “I’ll tell you, but let’s not go snooping around, okay?” Kyle nodded.

“Right. You’re right, that’s smart.”

And they didn’t go snooping. 

Not on purpose, at least. 

Just after the football team left the locker room, Jason noticed that Max hadn’t come out. It’d been a couple minutes even, and he still hadn’t come out. 

The game wouldn’t start for a while, so he motioned Kyle over.

“Max hasn’t come out,” Jason said, looking at the shower shack.

“Huh,” Kyle said. He’s the one who led the way in there. 

There was no door, it had snapped off back in their sophomore year, when Max got so angry at the creaking noise it made whenever it opened, he kicked it right off its hinges. 

“Good luck,” They heard.

“You’ve said that four times already,” They heard Max reply fondly.

“And you’ve yet to leave. That is your fault. You stay here and tempt me with your stupid face. I cannot be blamed for wanting to kiss my boyfriend ‘good luck’ before a game he really cares about.”

Kyle and Jason looked at each other with wide eyes before walking in and around the mini-hall that the doorway opened to.

“You don’t even like…” Max trailed off, noticing Kyle and Jason standing there with wide eyes. “Football,” He finished numbly. 

“I knew it!” Kyle screamed at long last. “I knew there was something going on!” Richie stiffened, his hands still stuck to Max’s waist.

“Hey, it’s okay,” Max said to Richie quietly. “It’ll be okay, I got you.” 

“Whoa, yeah,” Jason said, stepping to Richie’s side.

Richie’s jaw was tight and his lips trembled in fear. 

“Richie, we’re not gonna do anything, we just thought there was something goin’ on,” Jason reassured. “Cuz, Max wasn’t bein’ a jerk so much.”

“Yeah, Richie, we don’t care about you two being together,” Kyle agreed. “I just like being right.” Max glared at him. 

“See, we’re okay,” Max said. “Nothing bad will happen.”

“So,” Richie choked, looking up at Max with wet eyes. “You’re not going to leave me now that people know?” 

“Wha- Richie, of course not,” Max said, sounding almost offended he would ask. “I just don’t want to get in trouble for liking guys. But first of all, they’re totally chill with it, and two, even if they weren’t, it’s not like they’re gonna get locked in my room for a week.” All eyes whipped to Max, concerned. “Not that that’s happened before,” He said, his eyes shifting between the boys. 

“Okay,” Richie said. “I’m sorry,” He said, wiping his face. “I’m just being stupid then.”

“Hey, it’s okay,” Max said. “I don’t wanna lose you either.” He pressed a quick kiss to Richie’s lips carefully.

“You guys are sweet and all,” Jason said, “But we should probably get out there.” 

“Oh, shit right!” Max said. “Okay.” He kissed Richie once more. “I gotta go. I’ll see you after, okay?”

“Okay,” Richie said with a smile. 

Max went out of the locker rooms, accompanied by Jason and Kyle, joining their team. Richie left shortly thereafter. 

Max was a little distracted at the beginning of the game, but Richie cheering them along as Zeke definitely helped. Max knew that Richie struggled faking joy and energy, so it’d be easy to tell if he was still hurting. And he wasn’t.

It might’ve been Max’s best game of the season so far.

[bbyeeti]

character analysis anon (I've got to shorten this to something)

You see I'm actually the devil tempting you with sweet sweet character analysis

(Also if you saw errors in my analysis, no you didn't.)

You hit on three other topics that I wanted to address about Sunghoon but wasn't sure how to include in the post: Sunghoon's reckless behavior, metaphorical and literal deaths, and Sunghoon's selfishness.

Sunghoon's selfishness in particular is such a fun thing to discuss because he's selfless in his love for those he cares about but outside of them his empathy is noticeably lower. Honestly, this aspect of him really makes me think of our vampire brothers. The two main scenes that makes me think of parallels between them. The first is when Sunghoon stands by Jake knowing that he (nearly) murdered Sunoo and murdered Kai which remind me of Heeseung's relationship with Jay. The second is when Sunghoon uses Heeseung's vulnerability to steal the card back which makes me think of Niki? Niki mainly in taking advantage of trust given but I think that could also apply to Jay.

There's also another topic that I included but wished I went more indepth in: Sunghoon's romantic relationships. As much as I adore JayHoon they're a concerning IRL couple. They do genuinely care about each other now and cleared some of the secrets between thm at least. (And Hajoon was Hajoon.) I don't have enough data to establish a pattern but I can defintely draw out some examples of Sunghoon (unconsciously/consciously) seeking unhealthy romantic relationships.

I also want to mention that I think that by the time we meet Sunghoon he's already found some stable footing which is why his boundaries aren't extremely unhealthy but he still has some unhealthy tendencies. Unfortunately, you can't just untraumatize yourself and making progress takes time. Unlearning bad habits and thinking patterns is difficult on its own, without having to deal the supernatural absurdity. (Meeting the vampires definitely made him backslide)

Thanks for expanding on why Sunghoon is drawn to danger! I had some inklings toward the notion but I couldn't narrow down the exact reason why Sunghoon kept going back.

Despite the numerous times Sunghoon has or has called himself weal or a coward, I've never truly considered him either? He's not the strongest physically or smartest but the fact that he's still standing despite everything (past and present) leaves me in awe. Being able to pick yourself up and rebuild your world from the ground up is strength. I really do love his character.

I'm glad you enjoyed it! It was a lot of fun to write :)

I loved the long response! Hearing more about the characters and what parts I've gotten right and missed is always fun to know!

(I'd probably only be able to do character analysis for Jay and Heeseung at this point! I feel like I have the most insight into what's going on with them due to their prevalence in the plot currently)

I fell for it😔

I've always found people who are wholly selfless a little bit alien, so there was no way Sunghoon would have been made this way. Why would you care about people who are not close to you T^T altruism, eh?

YOU CAN'T JUST UNTRAUMATISE YOURSELF, it's such a great sentence that I snorted

I don't know if Sunghoon seeks unhealthy relationships, but for sure jayhoon are not ahemmm *cough cough* very healthy. Since the beginning I knew there would be problems getting them on the right path and well, even though - as you've mentioned - they explained to each other a lot, there's still c: a lot they don't know. They don't have the greatest *base* but now I can at least say that they want their *narrows eyes* relationship to work out. Yeah, they're not boyfriends, but.

From Jay's pov, after his ehehe little ritual failed the second time, he thought about getting rid of Sunghoon for good (I mean, breaking off things with him), but he couldn't because he started liking him, and he grew to be grateful that the bonding thing work out. So, at least Jay's been genuine for some time now.

Still, Heeseung would probably be the best option, so if Jungwon didn't die, Jaywon were together, and Heeseung didn't have any deals this psycho vampire guy, maybe they would actually be together. If Jakehoon weren't dating. 'Cause it's probable they would by the end of college.

Oooohoo it was fun to read, but I feel like I've already told you this xD

(you should take care of hajoon. if it's not the most interesting character in the whole fic then i'm not sure who is🙄)

[buttercream-squad-imagines]

Tinder in Real Life

Pairings: Harry Lewis x fem!Reader, Sidemen x platonic!Reader Word Count: 2k Warnings: Language some people may find offensive, sexual themes, recycled lines from Sidemen Tinder in Real Life because I'm not at all creative Request: Hey! Could you do reader x Harry imagine where the sidemen do a collab video with the reader who is also a big youtuber and Harrys celebrity crush. And during the video the reader is very flirty, leaving Harry a flustered mess when the flirting is directed towards him, but very jealous when its with any other sidemen.

The Sidemen were one of the biggest groups on YouTube and one that you were very familiar with. At the age of 23, you were a fair bit younger than some of its oldest members but yet you had a close relationship with JJ, whom you had met through YouTube.

You had started your channel when you were 17, just under four years ago, making makeup videos, which was a passion of yours when you were younger. Not that you were any good at it back then. Those videos quickly become unlisted when your channel started blowing up in late 2016, now nearing 20 million at the present time.

It wasn't long before you expanded your horizons and had started making different sorts of videos, including vlogs of your everyday life - which wasn't and still isn't that exciting in your opinion - and those where you just had a laugh, attempting to do stupid challenges that were so popular back then. It was those, however, that grew your channel. Your fans seemed to love them and so you gradually started to make more.

As your small channel began to grow significantly, it caught the attention of KSI, a member of the Sidemen, who reached out to you to for a collab. You were ecstatic. You couldn't believe it at the time, why would someone like KSI with 20 million subscribers want to collaborate with you? By that time, you couldn't exactly call yourself a small channel anymore, with almost 5 million subscribers but it still didn't make any sense to you.

You and JJ quickly bonded after filming together. You had a very similar sense of humour and interests. As the years went, the older boy became one of your best friends, the nature of your relationship being very teasing and flirtatious but the both of you knew it was a joke. It was just the way you both were.

Though despite having known him for nearing 3 years now, you had never met the rest of the Sidemen, with the exception of Simon, as he lived with JJ. Which is why when he texted asking you to collaborate with the Sidemen, you couldn't turn the offer down. You were a fan of the group and the content they were producing. You thought the videos that they made were exceptional, that they were pushing the envelope of the standard of content on YouTube and often found yourself excited for new videos.

He had explained that they were filming another of their 'Tinder in real life' but a YouTuber version with the likes of BambinoBecky and ChiWithAC. You were so excited. You were finally going to meet the rest of JJ's friends and you had the opportunity to be a part of a Sidemen Sunday.

You arrived at the studio the boys were filming at in the afternoon, finding and greeting JJ before he introduced you to the other sidemen in addition to Lux, Freezy and Stephen.

"And you've already met Simon." He finished.

"Yeah. Nice to finally meet you all. JJ tells me a lot about you guys." You laughed.

"Because that's assuring." Ethan pointed out with a chuckle, the other boys letting out agreements.

"Not all bad, I promise." You teased, winking at him. Ethan felt the blood rushing to his face, immediately becoming flustered and stumbling over his words. You found that you often had that effect on people as you could be very direct and flirtatious even when you didn't mean it. To you it was just friendly banter.

"Geez Y/N, stop flirting with people you met literally five minutes ago." JJ rolled his eyes.

"You sound a bit jealous, Jide." You smirked, a teasing grin spread across your face.

"Nah, allow it." There were eruptions of laughter around the room, coming from the boys. You were quick to notice Harry standing out of the way and was significantly quieter than the others, with what seemed to be a forced smile on his face.

Harry was in his own head, barely paying attention to what was going on around him. When JJ had told him that you were going to be in the next Sidemen video, he panicked. You were an accomplished YouTuber who he was quite fond of to say the least. Well, that would be an understatement, he had a fairly large crush on you. A crush that no one but Freezy and Lux knew about.

He knew that JJ had been friends with you for some time now but never considered the possibility of even meeting you. His anxiety acted as a barrier to even the thought of it. But he was currently in the same room as you and had said nothing more than a short 'hello'. He longed to have the confidence Ethan had to speak to you, even more so for you to look at him the way you were.

Already you were flirting with JJ and Ethan, something that caused a pit to form at the bottom of his stomach. He wouldn't admit it, but he could slowly feel the jealousy forming. Not that he had anything to be jealous about in the first place!

You continued to speak with the boys as you got your mic set up, telling them stories you were sure would embarrass JJ.

"Y/N, stop." The older boy whined. He could be like a child sometimes, but it was one of his more endearing qualities. He simply wouldn't be JJ if he wasn't.

"No, carry on." Simon laughed.

"Oh, don't worry, there's plenty more where that came from." You teased.

"I think it's time we started, don't you think?" Harry grumbled.

"Right." You smiled at the boy, who's cheeks became tinted red. He ducked to hide his face and walked around to stand in the line, hiding himself in the middle.

"Hi, I'm Y/N, I'm 23 and I'm from Y/H/T." You spoke to the camera once you were given the go ahead.

"I'm Simon, I'm 28. I like to practice safe sex."

"Always a good start."

"I could tie you to the bed, so you don't fall off." He finished with a giggle. You acted like you were pondering it for a moment before letting out a laugh and swiping right.

"I'm down for that." You teased. The boys all let out rumbles of laughter

"Hi, I'm Ethan, I'm 26 and kiss me if I'm wrong, but you're gonna swipe right."

"What would you rather?" You joked. Ethan shrugged his shoulders and walked closer to the board, sticking his head through with his lips puckered, eliciting a cry of protest from Harry that this wasn't allowed. You laughed and made an over exaggerated motion to swipe to the right, causing him to pout playfully but walked over to the right anyway.

"Hi, I'm Josh, I'm 28. KSI has a top ten single, but you're the only hot single I can see."

"Wow, that was smooth!" You said with a grin. "Definite yes from me."

"I'm Callum, I'm 26. Are you into fitness?" Freezy asked.

"Can't say I am." You replied, unsure of what turn this could take.

"How about you fitness dick in your mouth?"

"I wouldn't get too excited babes, I gag on my toothbrush." You laughed. "We could try though."

You swiped right on him, chuckling as you watched him let out a yes before joining Simon, Ethan, and Josh. You frowned slightly, a crease forming between your brows as you saw Harry whisper something furiously at his friend but ultimately got distracted by Vik stepping up to go next.

"I'm Vik, I'm 25. My ex-girlfriend always said I'd never do better than her, wanna prove her right?" You could hear the cries of the boys in the background, some scolding him, others laughing.

"Man actually said prove her right. Not wrong." JJ shrieked with a shocked look on his face, holding his head with his hands.

"You need to find someone for that." You snarked, swiping left on the boy, who shrugged and walked off.

"Damn! You got told!" Lux cackled.

"Uh hi. I'm Harry. I'm uh 25, no I'm not I'm 24." He stumbled. "Are you sure you're a muggle? Because that ass is magical."

"You should see how magical it can be." You spoke before cringing at yourself and laughing, swiping right to avoid a reply. The boy's face grew a bright shade of red, closely resembling the colour of a tomato.

"Geez, is that an offer?!" Freezy yelled from the right side. You laughed, observing how Harry whispered furiously to the boy to stop and winked at him once he had could see. Your laughter only increased as you watched JJ step up.

"I'm JJ. I'm 28 and are you a raisin? Cause you're raising my dick." The boy in question stood in front of you so confidently, hands clasped together in front of him so seriously that you just lost it. By the time you composed yourself, there were tears almost falling from your eyes.

"A* for effort." You laughed, swiping right eliciting a cry of success.

You had wrapped up filming your segment of the video, which conveniently was the last of the day. You found JJ who you spoke to whilst the other boys were otherwise occupied talking to each other.

"Cheers for coming, Y/N/N. You've been great."

"Anything for you." You joked.

"Don't tempt me." He laughed. You could feel eyes on you, eyes that were burning into your side. You turned your head to see Harry staring you and JJ down before looking away after being caught in the act, and suddenly felt very uncomfortable.

"Does Harry not like me or something?" You whispered to JJ, feeling self-conscious all of a sudden.

"Not that I know of." He frowned looking at the younger boy. "He can be a bit awkward at times and gets flustered a lot."

"Right." You agreed. You excused yourself before sauntering up to the boy in question, calling his name to snap him out of the daze he appeared to be in.

"Oh, um hey Y/N." He stumbled.

"Hi." You smiled gently. "I uh, I was just wondering, do you... have I done something to offend you?"

"Offend me? Why, uh, why would you think that?" He rambled.

"It's just... it's nothing, it's probably just me overthinking things." You waved it off, feeling like a complete idiot.

"I'm sorry if I gave you the impression that I don't like you. I don't not like you, in fact I really like you! Oh, um I mean I like you, you're very pretty." The boy couldn't stop rambling which made you laugh. "No, wait."

"You think I'm pretty?" You blushed interrupting him. Harry felt his mouth go dry, not being able to get anything coherent to come out. "Well, Harry, I really like you too."

"What?" His eyebrows shot up so far it was almost comical. "Really? So, you don't like the other guys?"

"What? No." You laughed. "That's absurd. Why would you think that?"

"You seemed very..." The boy trailed off, not wanting to offend you after you had admitted to liking him.

"Flirty?" You finished, causing him to nod. "I'm like that with everyone, I don't mean to be half the time."

"Oh."

"Well, how about you give me your phone number and when you finally grow a pair, you can ask me out?" Your confidence levels had shot up spontaneously.

"Uh, sure." His cheeks had become a dark shade of red as he passed his phone to you so you could put your number in. You kept looking up at him as you typed, putting your name under 'Y/N x' in his contacts before handing it back to him.

"Y/N! Come on! We're going to Nando's!" JJ called from the other side of the room.

"Call me." You winked. Your bottom lip was caught between your teeth and was currently the only thing from stopping the wide grin from spreading across your face. A grin that hadn't disappeared from your face for the rest of the day, much to the curiosity of JJ, who was disappointed when you refused to tell him why, or more appropriately who, had put the smile on your face.

[tchallasbabymama]

Don't Forget About Us

Hello, my lovelies. Here’s my contribution to @nahimjustfeelingit-writes smut challenge (the prompt is in bold!) Let’s see what Erik’s up to now, shall we?

Don’t forget to check out my masterlist to read my other stories and oneshots. Your comments and reblogs mean the world to me, so make sure to let me know what you think! And let me know if you want to be tagged in any of my writing. Enjoy😘

Word count: 5,595

CW: smut...duh.

“So, what do you do for a living?”

Kayla sighed internally at the question and took a sip of her Pinot Grigio. She hated first dates with a burning passion, but unfortunately, that was the only way to find a man around here. She went through the motions of politely answering his questions, barely asking any of her own. She didn’t care. Even just fifteen minutes in, Kayla could tell he didn’t excite her, and she lamented the waste of a good outfit as she listened to him drone on about his life. Every now and then, he’d stop and ask a question about her, but she could tell he was only asking so he could talk more about himself.

How many siblings do you have?

What’s your sign?

Why did your last relationship end?

Her mind traveled to her ex-boyfriend, Erik Stevens. They had spent six blissful years together, and Kayla thought he was the one. She wanted them to get married and start a family, and she thought he did, too, but every time she brought it up, he’d find some excuse to change the subject. At thirty years old, Kayla wasn’t getting any younger, so she grew tired of his avoidance and eventually cut him loose. She needed more out of life, but the guy currently sitting across from her certainly wasn’t it.

“We wanted different things,” she answered vaguely and took another sip. It would be a long night with what’s-his-name. David? Devon? Whatever. At least he had money and took her to a nice restaurant.

Darryl took the opportunity to bore her with the details of his job, which Kayla already knew. He was a colleague of her best friend, Carina’s husband. They worked at the same law firm, and Carina decided to hook them up after tiring of hearing Kayla complain about dating apps. As much as Kayla hated Tinder, she would’ve much rather been at home on her couch swiping left on the cesspool of single men Oakland had to offer. Every few dozen swipes or so, she’d find a cutie, but his bio would be abysmal, or his conversation skills would fall flat.

Despite the fact that their relationship just couldn’t make it, Kayla still thought of Erik as the gold standard. Just thinking about his dimples and his struggle beard made her smile dreamily. His big, strong arms would wrap around her and hold her tight at night, and she’d trace her fingers over the intentionally placed keloid scars that held his darkest secrets. She missed retwisting his locs and the way he always smelled like sandalwood and warm vanilla. Kayla didn’t want to admit it, but she still loved him. No man could compare to her Erik.

“Hello? Kayla?”

“Huh? Oh, sorry. Can you repeat that last part?”

“Uh, yeah, sure. What’s got you so distracted, babygirl?”

Kayla fought the bile rising in her throat. She wasn’t his babygirl. It didn’t even sound right coming from his mouth. Maybe it was the thinness of his lips. They weren’t “white man” thin, but they couldn’t hold a candle to the juicy pussy pleasers she had grown accustomed to.

“Nothing, just thought I saw somebody I know. You were saying?”

“Just that you look beautiful tonight,” Damon attempted to flirt with her.

Kayla wanted to roll her eyes but thanked him instead and smiled politely again. Of course she looked beautiful; she had pulled out all the stops for what she had hoped would be a good night out. Kayla had squeezed her thickness into a lavender satin dress. The way the dress’s skirt cinched on the side kept it snug around her plush waist, but the high slit that traveled up her thigh was the main attraction. The strappy silver heels on her feet showed off her matching pedicure that contrasted beautifully with her glistening brown skin, and her makeup was flawless. Her outerwear for the night, a cropped fur jacket that had found its way to the coat check when they arrived, was the icing on the cake. Her outfit deserved the appreciation, just not from Deshawn.

The waiter saved her from having to focus on her date when she brought out the food they had ordered. Since Kayla knew Derek had money, she had ordered the whole lobster, and she fought her mouth from drooling too much as the waiter set it down in front of her. It laid on a bed of forbidden rice, and the side of roasted brussels sprouts and cremini mushrooms looked heavenly. The ramekin of drawn butter off to the side tempted her as it sat next to the minuscule seafood fork. She may not enjoy her company for the evening, but Kayla damn sure was going to enjoy her meal.

“Looks good,” Dominic called from the other side of the table, breaking Kayla from her trance as he cut into his wagyu beef.

“Sure does.” Kayla wasted no time before digging into her meal. Not only was it the perfect excuse to avoid conversation, but it was perfect, period.

A slight chill permeated the air as the door swung open and the crisp January air entered the small restaurant. Kayla shivered as she complained internally about being forced to sit near the door, but that shiver intensified as she heard a voice. His voice.

“Reservation for Stevens, please.”

Kayla stilled.

“Of course. Right this way, sir,” the maitre d’ responded, and Kayla heard three sets of footsteps coming her way.

--------

“Babe, let’s go!”

“Yell at me one more time, woman,” Erik warned as he came around the corner into the living room, fastening his watch.

“I swear, you take more time getting ready than I do.”

“Whatever, Mo. You ready?”

“Nigga, I been ready!”

Erik rolled his eyes and grabbed his keys. It would be a rough night, and things were already starting off on a bad foot. He and Monique had been seeing each other for the better part of a year, and he’d finally reached his limit. She was overbearing, rude, and just after him for his money, but he hated being alone, so he put up with her bullshit. His cousin, T’Challa, had tried to hook him up with a few ladies back in Wakanda when he went to visit after his breakup, but nothing stuck. Almost immediately after coming back to the states, Erik met Monique at a charity event for the Outreach Center. She had the singing voice of an angel and had been booked as the entertainment for the evening. Erik was drawn to her like a sailor to a siren, and she immediately sank her teeth into him. Past her vocal talents, Monique wasn’t really anything special. Her personality left a lot to be desired, she wasn’t the sharpest crayon in the box, and she just wasn’t her.

The moment Kayla ended their relationship a year ago, Erik’s whole world shattered. He had lived a life full of pain and loss, but Kayla had been his lifeline. She pulled him out of the dark and made him revel in the sunshine. Hell, she was the sunshine, but now he had settled for a UV lamp at best. Kayla had wanted a life that Erik was too scared to give her, but that fear became his downfall. He still missed her most nights. He was lonely, and Monique was there to keep him company, but that wasn’t enough for him anymore. Erik craved a connection that Monique just couldn’t provide. So he decided he had to break it off and figured that doing so in a public place would probably be best. She had a tendency to throw things when she got angry.

The car ride to Chez Martine was tense. Monique had been angry all day because Erik had taken back his credit card even though she wanted to buy a new dress for their date. Her lousy mood almost made him dump her back at his condo, but Erik kept a cool head and stayed focused on the plan. He ignored the way Monique complained the entire time she got ready, reluctantly putting on a dress he had seen her wear before. It didn’t matter to him; he knew what the night held.

When they walked into the restaurant, Erik’s heart dropped into his stomach. He’d recognize that shoulder blade tattoo anywhere. She had cut off all her hair and lost a few pounds, but he knew for sure that he was looking at Kayla. His Kayla. He forced himself to look straight ahead as they passed her table and prayed that the maitre d’ didn’t sit them where she could see him. Unfortunately, he had no such luck because the only open table for two was directly within her line of sight. He prayed again that Monique would sit on the far side of the table, but Bast ignored his pleas once more. He had to sit facing her, and as soon as he got comfortable in his chair, her gaze slyly trailed over to him. They locked eyes across the room, and Erik’s heart stopped. She was just as beautiful as the last time he saw her all those months ago, but who the fuck was that sitting across from her?

“What are you looking at?” Monique’s abrasive voice cut through his eardrums.

“Nothing. Just thought I saw someone I know, that’s all.”

She cut her eyes at him and turned around to look as he buried his face in the menu.

“Quit being nosy,” he complained.

“I just wanna see who’s got your attention, that’s all.” Monique turned back around with a sour look on her face. “It’s probably that fat girl with her cleavage all out.”

“Mo, just look at the fucking menu and act like you got some sense.”

“Fine.”

Monique pouted until the waiter showed up, but she plastered a fake smile on her face as he took their order. As usual, she ordered the most expensive thing on the menu, and it bothered him to no end that she was hellbent on spending all of his money. Of course, he had plenty, but she felt entitled to it. Kayla never cared about him being rich. Hell, when they got together, she didn’t even know he was a prince, but he loved to spoil her nonetheless. He loved the look on her face when he’d buy her things or take her on the expensive trips that she more than deserved. Kayla appreciated everything he did for her with all her heart, but she’d say the same thing every time.

“Thank you, baby, but you’re all I need.”

Erik smiled fondly at the memory of when he bought her a diamond tennis bracelet from Wakanda for their second anniversary. She was so excited to have diamonds that weren’t marred by exploited labor that she damn near dropped the box when she saw what was inside. It had been a rough year for them, what with him disappearing for a couple of months to seize the Wakandan throne and all. She certainly had plenty of colorful words for him when he came back. He’ll never forget the look on her face when he showed up at her door. He had brought T’Challa for backup just in case, but she looked right past the king as tears welled up in her eyes at seeing her Erik, alive and well.

Erik’s eyes started to get misty as he thought about the way she kissed him with so much emotion...then slapped him across the face for leaving. His gaze wandered back over to Kayla and he noticed the light bounce off of something on her arm. She was wearing the bracelet.

As if she felt his glare, Kayla shifted uncomfortably in her seat, so he averted his eyes back to Monique, who had caught him staring again.

“Why don’t you go say hi?” she asked sarcastically, making him roll his eyes so hard they almost got stuck.

--------

Erik Stevens. Here, of all places. He just had to be here.

Kayla noticed that he didn’t seem to be enjoying his modelesque date’s company any more than she was enjoying Darwin’s, and the pang of jealousy she felt at seeing him with another woman went away. She knew she had no right to feel any kind of way about it, especially since she was the one that broke things off. That didn’t make it any easier, though.

Dylan was too wrapped up in his steak to notice her wandering eye, but it seemed that Erik’s food was as uninteresting as the woman across from him. Kayla watched as he half-heartedly pushed it around his plate, but he certainly kept his favorite whiskey coming. She wanted to chuckle but didn’t want Daniel to think he had anything to do with her levity. They were both drowning their dissatisfactions in their alcohols of choice, and Kayla got a phantom taste of Uncle Nearest 1856 on her lips as she watched him take a sip. When he set the glass down and licked his lips, Kayla felt flush. She missed those lips…

“So, how about dessert?” Damien asked as he leaned back in his chair and rubbed his stomach. “I hear their creme brulee is amazing.”

“Uh, sure, why not?”

“You know,” he began as he leaned in and reached for her hands. She allowed him to take them, but the softness of his hands disgusted her. No callouses, no roughness, not even a firm grip. “I’ve had a great night. I’d love to see you again.”

Kayla chuckled nervously, unsure of how to proceed.

“What are you doing next-”

“Are you fucking kidding me?!”

A shrill voice pierced the air as Erik’s date bolted up from her seat. Desmond, and the whole restaurant, turned around to see what was going on, and Kayla took the opportunity to remove her hands from his.

“Keep your voice down,” Erik sneered through his teeth. “We’re in public.”

“So?! You bring me out here just to dump me? To dump this?!” she gestured at her slim figure, and he rolled his eyes.

“You ain’t even all that,” he waved her off. He was tired of playing nice, and Kayla could see the exasperation written all over his face.

“Excuse me, miss-” the waiter attempted to calm her down, but the crazed woman cut him off.

“Stay out of this!”

“I’m so sorry,” Erik mouthed to the poor man who would absolutely be getting a monstrous tip later.

“Oh, you’re sorry for him, but not for me?”

“Mo, just sit down. We can finish our meal like adults-”

“Fuck you, Erik.” She threw her dirty martini at him, soaking the front of his all-black ensemble.

Kayla could damn near see the steam coming out of his ears as his apparent ex stormed out of the restaurant. Erik locked eyes with her across the room, and when he saw the concern written all over her face, his softened.

“Whew, poor fella,” Dexter commented as he turned back around. “Where was I? Oh-”

“Excuse me, where’s your restroom?” Kayla interrupted him as their waiter walked by.

“Right down there.” She pointed at a set of stairs off to the side, and Kayla thanked her as she slid out of her seat.

“I’ll be back, Darius.”

“It’s Denzel.” He deflated.

“Fuck,” she froze. She had been sure it was Darius. “Still, I’ll be back.”

“I’ll be here,” he responded, obviously upset by her slip-up.

Kayla hurried off down the stairs and leaned against the wall as she waited for either of the single-use restrooms to open up. She took a deep breath and opened her clutch, reaching in to pull out her phone with a shaky hand and typing in his number. It was one of the few she had memorized, just in case.

“You ok?”

Her thumb hovered over the send button, but she couldn’t press it. Her heart nearly thumped out of her chest at the thought of starting a conversation with him, but something within her said that she should. It would be weird not to say anything after all that, right?

“Hey-”

“Shit!” Kayla dropped her phone when his silky baritone graced her ears.

“My fault, ma.” Erik leaned over and picked the phone off the floor, checking it for cracks. He saw she had typed a message out to him and smirked before handing it back to her.

“T-thanks.”

“No problem. And, yeah, I’m ok.”

“Huh?”

Erik pointed at her phone screen.

“Oh! Right. Um, well, that’s good to hear.” Kayla attempted to push her hair behind her ear out of habit, forgetting she had just cut it all off a week ago.

“What about you?”

“What about me?”

“You ok? You don’t seem to into ole dude out there.”

Kayla sighed and rolled her eyes, “Oh, him.”

“Damn, it’s like that?” Erik laughed, and she slapped his arm. That slight contact was enough to spark a flame in them both, and Erik’s face turned serious. “For real, though, not going well?”

“Better than you, it seems,” she quipped as she eyed his wet shirt. That was a bad idea because his first three buttons were undone, and she caught a peek of the raised scars that she missed so much. And that broad chest, and the chain with his father’s ring that he always wore. He’d let her wear it from time to time, and she always felt like it was such an honor. He trusted her enough to let her wear it. He loved her enough to-

Kayla pried her eyes away and made yet another mistake: she looked up at him. Those eyes still looked like sweet, sweet molasses, and even though his locs were braided back, she could tell he was letting them grow out. She momentarily wondered who was retwisting them nowadays, but her train of thought was cut short by the scent of sandalwood and vanilla. Kayla’s mind went blank as she inhaled slowly.

“Heh, yeah. That was...that was pretty embarrassing. Not even gonna lie.” Erik looked away shyly, unable to hold her gaze.

“I guess you’ll need to find a new date spot, huh?”

“Nah, I think I’m good on dating for a while.”

“Same,” Kayla sighed. “Dating sucks.”

“Yeah…”

One of the bathroom doors unlocked, and a middle-aged white man stepped out and passed them on the way up the stairs.

“Well, I should-”

“Yeah, go ahead.”

Kayla walked towards the bathroom, but before she could reach the door, she felt a light tug on her wrist. His touch still gave her goosebumps, and he noticed her raised skin as she turned to face him.

“I just, uh...it was nice seeing you, Kay-kay.” Erik smiled at her, and she nearly melted. She missed when he called her that, too. “You look good.”

“Thanks, E.” She smiled back. “So do you.”

He let her go, and Kayla disappeared into the bathroom. When she closed the door behind her, she took a deep breath to center herself. After all these months, Erik still took her breath away. He clouded her senses and scrambled her mind. Even as she took care of business, her brain replayed their short interaction on a loop.

Kayla locked eyes with her reflection as she dried her hands. How could she go back up there to- what’s his name? Oh, yeah, Da- Denzel. That’s it, Denzel. How could she go back up there to his mediocre company when the man she still loved had made her feel so alive with just one touch. That was the magic of Erik, his magnetism. When they were together, she couldn’t help but be drawn to him, even when she wanted to slap him across his beautiful face. Those were some of the best times, though. If she was angry at him, he knew exactly what to do to calm her down. To put her in her place. To remind her-

Kayla’s daydreaming was cut short by a knock at the door.

“Occupied!”

It came again.

“I’ll be out in a minute!”

She reached for another paper towel to dab off the sweat that had started to pool on her skin at the thought of Erik’s dominance when the door opened.

“What the f- Erik?!”

He pushed inside the bathroom and locked the door behind him.

“You need to start locking doors, Kay.”

“I- what do you want?”

“I want to talk to you,” he spoke as he moved closer to her.

“Here?!”

“Yeah, here,” he chuckled.

Kayla rolled her eyes and tried to push past him.

“Now is not the time or place-”

“When is?” he blocked her exit, and she crossed her arms in defeat, looking up at him through her lashes as she leaned against the sink. “Look, I just need to say something real quick.”

“Fine,” Kayla sighed and gestured for him to continue. She knew there was no use fighting him. She wasn’t leaving that bathroom until he was good and ready.

“Kay,” his voice softened, and she looked away only to have her face pulled back in his direction. “Kay-kay, look at me.”

She made the mistake of doing just that, getting lost in his eyes again.

“I miss you,” Erik murmured.

“Erik-”

“Look, I know, ok? I know. And I’m sorry, Kay. I really am- no, look at me. I’m sorry I wasn’t enough for you...but I miss you, girl.”

Kayla’s eyes welled up with tears that she tried her hardest to blink away, but one had the nerve to fall. Erik wiped it away, and the next one, and the next one. A sob wracked Kayla’s body, and he wrapped his arms around her body.

“Don’t cry, babygirl. I know you worked hard on your makeup.”

Kayla laughed through her tears, but the emotions washed back over her, and she buried her face into his chest. It was already soaked with gin, so what harm would a few tears do?

He held her and rocked her softly from side to side as she cried, and after a couple of minutes, she found the will to look up at him again. His cheeks were wet, so she reached up and swiped her thumbs over them as she held his face in her small hands. He nuzzled into them and kissed her wrists.

“I miss you, too, E,” she croaked.

“I know, babygirl.”

He leaned in to kiss her forehead, and she closed her eyes as his soft lips caressed her skin. They stayed intertwined for who knows how long until Erik felt Kayla begin to pull back. He looked down at her, and the two of them locked eyes. Before they knew it, their lips had met in the middle in a passionate embrace. They got lost in each other for a moment until common sense returned to Kayla, and she pushed him off.

“We can’t-”

“Why not?”

“Because…”

“Because what, Kay?” Erik’s voice rumbled as he closed what little gap was between their bodies. He left soft kisses on her temples before working down to her cheeks, then her jawline, and eventually the column of her neck. She let out a soft whimper when his teeth grazed the crook of her neck but pushed him back again before he could continue any further.

“Erik, I...I still love you, and-”

He attacked her lips with his, hands feverishly gripping her waist as he pushed her further into the sink. She had nowhere to go, and she was ok with that.

“I...love you...too...babygirl,” he whispered between kisses.

Kayla’s mind went blank as he lifted her up on the counter and pressed himself between her legs. She could feel him, all of him, and damn did she miss that monster between his legs.

“Erik,” she moaned as he nipped at her earlobe. He still knew how to play her body like a violin.

“Mmm, say it again.”

“Erik!” she squeaked as she felt his strong hands grip her thighs.

“Just like that,” he groaned, and she flooded her already wet panties.

“Baby-”

He connected his forehead to hers and stared deep into her eyes. “You miss me?”

“Mhm,” Kayla nodded with her lip between her teeth.

“I miss you, too, baby. I think about you all the time. Every day,” he pecked her lips, “every night. I miss everything about you, Kay-kay. Your off-key singing, your horrible cooking-”

“Shut up,” Kayla giggled as his hands traveled up her dress.

“Your body…fuck I miss this body. I miss how you smell, how you taste...how that tight little pussy feels wrapped around my dick.”

Kayla widened her legs for him as his fingers found their way to the seat of her panties, stroking up and down her slit. Erik kissed his way back down her face and over to her ear, his warm breath sending chills down her spine.

“Do you think about me when you touch yourself? Because I do. You’re all I see when I stroke my dick...wishing it was your hand...your lips...this fucking pussy.”

Erik pushed her panties to the side, and his nimble fingers circled her clit. Kayla let out a small moan that was music to his ears, making fingers move faster and her breath grow shallower with each rotation.

“Answer me.”

“Mhm.”

“Come on, babygirl, you can do better than that. You think about me when you play in your pussy? This pussy right here?” he asked as he slapped her vulva, her wetness sticking to his hand.

“Y-yes, baby-”

“Uh-uh, you know who I am. Say it,” Erik commanded as he snuck three fingers inside her wetness, making her moan loudly in his ear. “Shhh, you gotta be quiet, babygirl. You don’t want people out there knowing how much of a slut you are, right?”

Kayla shook her head no.

“That’s what I thought. Now, I asked you a question, Kayla,” he reminded her. His gruff voice made her weak, and the fingers that were steadily speeding up inside her certainly didn’t help. “Answer me. Who am I, babygirl?”

Kayla tried to hold out as much as she could. She didn’t want to say it, too proud to give in, but the way he was currently stretching out her pussy and curling his fingers inside her made her cling to his shoulders. The bastard knew what he was doing, and she didn’t want to let him win. But then, he played dirty and bit down on her neck. She cried out, and when he pulled back to look at her, the ferocity in his eyes drove her up the wall.

“I said, who the fuck am I, Kayla?” Erik growled. His hand sped up, making her weak with every thrust. She couldn’t hold it anymore and came undone around him, her mouth betraying her as his name fell from her lips.

“Daddy!” she gasped as her pussy spasmed, and he chuckled darkly.

“Damn right I am,” he kissed her lips, “now gimme that pussy. Daddy missed his pussy.”

Kayla heard a rip and felt the cool air between her legs as he tore through her panties to get to her treasure trove. She reached down between them and grabbed his clothed erection in her hand, making him groan as he bit down on his luscious bottom lip. She undid his belt buckle and slowly unzipped his pants before reaching in and pulling out his throbbing dick.

The longing in her eyes told him everything he needed to know, so he pushed her legs back and tapped his head on her clit.

“You want daddy’s dick in you?”

“Mhm,” she whimpered.

“Good.”

He pushed in and groaned at the feeling of her pussy walls gripping him as he sheathed himself inside her.

“Fuck, you feel like home.”

Kayla moaned into his neck in response and wound her hips against him, meeting him thrust for thrust as he stroked into her slow and deep. She couldn’t form words. He felt so damn good inside her that Kayla’s brain had short-circuited. Erik’s dick hit spots that she could never find herself no matter how hard she tried. Even in her dreams, he drove her body wild. She had spent the last year trying to find somebody, anybody who could make her feel that way, but nobody could compare to Erik Stevens.

Erik and Kayla panted heavily into each others’ mouths as he made love to her body, and as soon as Kayla started to tense up, his thrusts grew harder.

“I-I-”

“I know, babygirl. Daddy feels it,” he groaned as he nipped at her bottom lip. “Cum on my dick like a good girl.”

His words sent Kayla into overdrive, and her body shook as she spilled over him. Her spasming walls hugged him tight, and she wrapped her legs around his waist, begging him with her eyes.

“You feel amazing,” she moaned.

“Mhm. I know them other niggas wasn’t hitting it like this. I just know it. Look at you, cumming all over daddy’s dick. Look at it!” He grabbed her chin and made her look down at her throbbing pussy as his dick slid in and out of her.

“We look so good, daddy!”

Erik slammed into her, and she bit into his shoulder to keep from screaming. He gave her his all over and over, rocking the countertop in the process.

“We’ll look even better if you let me cum in this pussy. Mix my cum with yours-”

“Yes!”

“Yes?” He chuckled. “You want it that bad, huh? Nasty ass, in here getting fucked while that bum ass nigga’s waiting for you upstairs.”

“Mmm, I want it.”

“Want what, babygirl?” Erik teased as he brought his thumb to her clit, strumming it slowly as he thrust into her.

“You. I want you to cum deep in me.”

“Shit,” Erik groaned. “You want it deep in there?”

“Mhm. Put it where it belongs, daddy.” Kayla licked up the side of his neck, making his knees buckle. “Cum in your pussy.”

Erik lost all sense of control and pounded into her tight pussy, somehow getting even deeper in preparation for his release. Kayla held on tight as she felt him begin to spasm inside her, and she released around him again as his deep moans tickled her ear. Erik thrust extra deep and held his dick in place as he emptied his balls into her warmth, whimpering lightly as she rubbed his back to soothe him and bring him back down.

“I missed you, babygirl.”

“I missed you, too, daddy.”

They stayed like that, wrapped up in each other until their breathing slowed. Erik was the first to move, slowly pulling himself out of Kayla as she whined at the loss of contact. He kissed all over her face before planting a slow, sweet kiss on her lips.

“I can’t let you go again, Kay-kay,” his voice cracked as tears threatened to fall from his eyes again.

Kayla pulled him back in and kissed him so deeply that she nearly lost herself in him again, but he pulled away and looked her in her eyes.

“I’m serious, girl. I’ll do anything. I’ll marry you, give you as many big-headed babies as you want. Just, please, Kay-” she cut him off with another kiss to shut him up.

“We should go back to my place and talk,” she whispered, and Erik’s face lit up. Something about the way she said it, the way she kissed him, the way her body still responded to his...it gave him hope. Kayla smiled at him and pecked his lips once more before hopping off of the sink. He had to catch her because her legs were wobbly, and she stumbled a little in her heels.

“You aight?” he laughed.

“No, nigga,” she slapped his chest, and the two of them got caught in a laughing fit. They had really just fucked in the bathroom at Chez Martine. Kayla was on cloud nine until a thought occurred to her, and her face fell flat. “Oh, shit.”

“What?” Erik’s face turned serious, and his eyes scanned over her body, looking for whatever the problem was.

Kayla started giggling again, and he looked confused.

“What is it?” he asked, barely able to keep a straight face. Her laugh was always so infectious…

“Demetrius.”

“Who?!”

“My date.”

“Girl, don’t worry about him. He probably thinks you dipped out anyway.”

Kayla shrugged and fixed her dress as Erik stuffed his shirt back in his pants. They checked their reflections in the mirror, and Kayla was pleasantly surprised that her makeup was still intact thanks to that setting spray she had splurged on the other day.

“Ready?” Erik asked as he admired her beauty. Kayla nodded, and he unlocked the door, opening it to find Duncan leaning against the wall with a sour look on his face. Kayla’s eyes blew wide as she tried to figure out what to say to her date for the evening.

“Heyyy, um…”

“Denzel,” he seethed.

“Yeah, sorry. So, um, we’re-”

“Sorry, bruh,” Erik clapped him on the shoulder, “but we heading out. Bathroom’s all yours, though.”

Erik pulled Kayla along, and she sent Deion an apologetic glance before following Erik up the stairs. It seemed the whole restaurant knew what had occurred, but neither one of them cared. They were just happy to be around each other again. It had been entirely too long.

Taglist: @ladymac82, @kitesatforestp, @harleycativy, @raysunshine78, @maddeningmayhem, @theblulife, @motheroffae, @love-mesome-me,@toni9, @bribrisback, @impremenior, @blacklytical, @uzumaki-rebellion, @honeyandpeaches, @cecereads209, @wakandama2,

[merakiui]

What do you think of the concept of yan!xiao, childe venti trapping their darling in a teapot?

I feel like they would be less restrictive since the darling wouldn't necessarily be able to escape most likely, so they wouldn't worry about restraint much. Esp in Ventis case...he is the God of freedom so while his darling isn't exactly 'free' they're still kinda free in a way that they have their own world to be free in?

Xiao would probably be somewhat restricted, but only just keep them in the house because he probably wouldn't trust them to be by themselves yet--he figures they may try to run off and hide from him or something

Childe would probably let them try to "escape" on purpose and would be absolutely amused when his darling finds out they wouldn't be able to leave

(cw: yandere, captivity, unhealthy behaviors/relationship, mention of children and implied stockholm syndrome for childe’s part)

Venti doesn't exactly lie to you, but he does trick you. He's aware that it's not the nicest thing to do and that it's not exactly captivity if you're living in a world that resembles the one outside. Only this pocket-sized world is nicer and happier and there aren't any people to get in the way. He tells you about it when you're vulnerable. Maybe you're drunk or you're crying your eyes out because something horrible happened. Either way, you're not in the right state of mind when you make the comment: "I wish I could live in my own ideal world for just one day." And this is great news for Venti because it makes relocation so much easier.

He shows you the teapot and explains it briefly, leaving out certain details. It's better if you don't know everything about how the teapot works. After all, ignorance is bliss. Venti tells you how to get in, but he doesn't tell you how to get out. And the way he describes it makes it sound so tempting—as if living inside this teapot for a bit will cure whatever's bothering you. You decide it wouldn't hurt to spend a day or two inside the teapot to see the little world Venti holds in the palms of his hands.

It's a lot of fun at first. You and Venti glide from the top of the mountains in Emerald Peak, he sings melodious ballads as you look up at the sky, and the two of you play hide-and-seek inside of the house, playfully popping out of rooms and laughing when you’re caught. Eventually the charm wears off and you start to yearn for the outside world. It’s not the same in the teapot. As pretty and peaceful as it may be, it still feels so empty. And when you bring it up to Venti he finds small ways to change the subject. It probably plays out like this:

“Venti, I’d like to go home now.”

“But we were just about to play another round of hide-and-seek! Come on! Don’t be a spoilsport! One more round? Then we’ll leave.”

Or he’ll tell you that you’re already home. There’s always a big smile on his face when he says stuff like that. He’s happy that he gets to spend so much time with you and no one can interfere. But it does get annoying when you start to beg for the old world. Your pleas to leave will fall upon his deaf ears. Venti does feel a little bad when you start to sulk, but his sympathy is short-lived. Let’s not forget that you were the one who wanted this. You wanted to live in your ‘ideal world.’ And isn’t this ideal?

As an adeptus, Xiao is aware of Sub-Space Creation and the effort it takes to construct a presentable teapot. He’s been working hard on his ever since you came into his life. Before he knew you he didn’t have a reason to put effort into it because he stays at Wangshu Inn, but after he met you he started working a lot harder. He tries to make the teapot as comfortable as possible. You mentioned you like dogs or cats in passing? You can find a few in the teapot. You said you like berry bushes and flower fields? There’s a bunch in his teapot. He probably has a nearly perfect model of your room in there as well. Before he brings you into the teapot, he’ll often sit in that room and make sure everything replicates the original, down to the bed frame and the fabric used for the pillow case.

He’ll put some of your things in it just so it feels more personal. Xiao knows he’s stealing from you whenever he does this, but it’s not like you ever noticed anything was missing. Besides, it’s all going in the teapot anyways. You won’t even need your real room or mortal possessions anymore. Xiao is actually quite proud of the teapot and manages to fool himself into thinking you’ll like it, too. And you do (for the first few days, that is). He’s very forward with his question of whether or not you’d like to see his teapot. And you eagerly nod because the two of you are friends and Xiao wants to show you something he made and he looks a little…excited? There’s definitely light in his eyes when he gets your agreement to view the inside of his teapot.

Once you’re inside, you’re genuinely surprised. It’s far more beautiful than you could have ever imagined. The Floating Abode is a really gorgeous landscape. You’re so caught up in looking at the sunset and the flowers and the animals that roam the teapot that you aren’t aware of the horrors that lie just beyond. You’ll find the room that resembles yours in no time and it’s really creepy. As much as you try to tell yourself that Xiao means well and wouldn’t actually do something like this on purpose, it’s hard to ignore the fact that everything is practically identical to your room. It’s so, so strange. You want to ignore it, but you just can’t. It’s so obvious.

It’s definitely creepy, but you don’t have the heart to tell him.

You hold your tongue because you don’t want to hurt his feelings. You’re really the only close friend he has, so you’d feel bad if you insulted his interior decorating skills. Xiao’s pleased to hear that you like it so much. Praise falls from your lips like a waterfall and it gives him a sense of relief. He’s so happy that you like it and since you’re okay with it it’ll be fine if you live here. When he tells you that, your brain freezes and you’re not sure how to respond.

“Live here? Like…permanently?”

And to your shock he nods.

Xiao is far less lenient than Venti. With Venti everything feels like eternal, childish fun with the idea of freedom sprinkled in. But with Xiao it’s definitely a harsher form of captivity. You aren’t allowed outside because he’s worried you might fall off of the bridges that connect the floating islands or you might try to find your way out of the teapot. So you’re confined to the mansion. It’s got everything you could ever need and the interior design matches that of your home perfectly. Just treat it like it’s your own home and it won’t be so bad. You definitely try to see the good in this situation because you care about Xiao, but it’s so hard when he’s keeping you here like you’re just another addition to his teapot.

It’s miserable, but at least you can count on him to visit you every single day.

Childe is very receptive to the idea of owning his own little world in a small teapot. Maybe he was holding you captive before he came upon the teapot and while you’re sleeping he relocates you. You don’t expect to wake up in a new location, but you assume you’re still somewhere in Liyue. Childe finds it cute that you’re so startled, clearly confused with the change in scenery. And when you glance at the surroundings on the Cool Isle, it feels like you might have a chance. Childe seems to think so because he waves you off, telling you with the sincerest voice that you’re ‘free to go.’

You don’t need to be told twice and so you run because you’re invigorated. You can leave and he’s not coming after you. Childe doesn’t even raise his bow in warning. You’re actually leaving him and he’s letting you! But it feels too good to be true. A day passes and you learn that there’s no one else to help you. So you find an empty shack on the shoreline and you hide in it because survival is the only thing you know right now. And the day goes by, the night comes, and morning makes its arrival. You’re still safe. He hasn’t found you.

And it really feels like you can make it out of this. Even if there’s no one around, you can still find something to help you. You’d take anything at this point. By the end of the week, you’re losing sight of your goal and you really just want to head back to the mansion and nap on a comfortable bed. You’ve been catching the crabs and the fish and doing what you can to start a long-lasting fire. When Childe finds you, you’re so exhausted from running and hiding that you collapse into his arms. And he smiles so sweetly while he tells you something that shatters your entire world.

“You did well, comrade, but this isn’t Liyue. You have no need to run.”

It’s not even Teyvat. It’s another world entirely—one existing solely within a teapot. And everything comes crashing down when you realize just how impossible that makes any escape attempts. No human contact. No energy or life that comes from meeting with friends and seeing family. It truly does feel like you and he are the only people in this world.

Childe knows that you’ll adjust to this new world whether you like it or not. It was fun to toy with you in the beginning (and it still is) when you didn’t realize this was the world inside the teapot. But now he just wants to settle into a comfortable life. He takes every chance he has to visit you and eventually you’ll find yourself succumbing to the relaxing pleasures of domestic life. You learn how to cook delicious meals with Childe’s help, you collect seashells on the shore to cure your boredom, and you’ll take care of any chores or housework. It warms Childe’s heart to see you accepting this life.

Maybe the two of you can start a family. Maybe he should get a few pets to liven up the house. It’s not like you can get away from him while inside the teapot, so it’s a recipe for anything to happen. And you’ve come to learn that what happens in the teapot stays in the teapot.

[migilini]

Give Me Attention - Charlie Gillespie

summary: Zoomcalls Classes with a bored Charlie

a/n: a/n: Don't quite know what this is but it was stuck in my head so here ya go.

words: 1.5k

warnings: some arguing, cursewords and pure fluff

Requests are open :)

MASTERLIST

------------------------------------------------------

Most of the time if someone asked how living with Charlie went you answered with ‘great, literally so amazing, he brings a smile to my face every day. And you meant it, at least most of the time. You loved the way he was awake long before you even dare to open your eyes and the fact that because of that there was always a freshly made coffee just waiting for you on the counter. You loved the way that he danced in the kitchen with you while he cooked dinner and the way the bedsheets always smelled like him. Yet, you weren’t gonna lie, especially the first couple of corona moths have taken a little toll on your relationship.

“Charlie, do you have to rehearse your lines in the living room?” you asked irritated, crossing your legs under the kitchen table you currently sat at.

“But here I have the most space to move around. I gotta move around. You also said that we can go over our lines together.” he whined from the living room. At this moment you cursed the fact that you had moved into an apartment with a connected kitchen and living room. It seemed like a good idea at the time, and it was, especially when you had friends over, but right now it was only trouble.

“I know babe, but I have this essay due tomorrow and I haven't had the chance to start because we’ve been on set and in so many meetings.”

“Then you work somewhere else?”

“This is the only room with a table!” you protested, gesturing to the table your school books, notes and laptop were scattered on.

“You chose to pursue acting and finish your degree!” he shot back, getting worked up over this simple thing. The hurt flashed in your eyes making him instantly regret his words.

“I’m sorry that my education is important to me Charlie and that I wanted to finish my last one and a half years at College.” You stood up and grabbed your things “Have fun running your lines.” Charlie only heard the bedroom door slam shut and winced at the sound.

He knew better than to immediately run after you, so he waited about ten minutes before approaching. He knocked on the door and leaned on the doorframe. “Baby come back out. I’m sorry. It's just...I had a bad day, couldn't remember any of my lines, and even though we live together I feel like we rarely see each other... both so busy with the show and I… I don't know, I let my frustration out on you.”

The door opened and you hugged him tightly “I’m sorry as well. I could've just worn headphones. I’m stressed and let it out on you as well. I’m so sorry.” you muttered into his chest.

Charlie kissed your head and asked, “Can I help you with College stuff?”

Arguments like these happened a lot during the starting months of the pandemic. Both of you stressed and tired, basically working your asses off and still trying to be caring for one another. It wasn't all sunshine and rainbows but after a storm of an argument, the clouds faded away and the sun came back out.

During the timespan from April to August, your boyfriend was bored, very bored. There sadly weren't many acting opportunities, there was not much to do in general and the press tour for JATP was scheduled after its release in September. You on the other hand had lots to do with school, participating in online classes, catching up on the material you missed last semester, writing essays and studying.

“Babeee…” he whined and propped his head up behind your laptop screen so just his eyes looked over it. “Watcha doiinn?”

“Pack it up Isabella…” you grinned at him “Currently working on a project due next week and I have a class in five minutes”

“What class?” he popped his head up a bit more, his whole face hovering just slightly in front of you. “Economics.”

“Boooriiing” he dragged out and rolled his eyes “Don’t you wanna do something more fun? Like Wii bowling, cooking, me.” he wiggled his eyebrows at you.

“As tempting as that sounds, I can't, this class is really important...sorry bubbs.” you looked up at him apologetically and pushed your computer glasses up your nose.

“Fine” he sulked, “give me a kiss and I'll leave you alone.”

You smiled and went to lean closer to his face, with one hand he grabbed the back of your head and pulled you closer. One kiss, two kisses, three kisses later, you tried to pull back. “One more,” he muttered against your lips and you caved.

And he really did leave you alone until you were done with all your classes. But another day meant another day full of classes and work. You quickly build your own little routine. Charlie still woke up earlier than you and greeted you in the kitchen with a smile, a coffee and a kiss. Then he would go on a run and you would start your first couple classes. He would come back, shower, prepper your face with ‘motivation kisses and then try to get your attention for the rest of the day.

++

“Braid my hair.” he wailed like a little kid and put his head on your lap. You looked down at him for a split second, your hand immediately tangled in his hair.

“That can’t be comfortable for you.” You chuckled and scanned his figure, the side of his right hip on the chair next to you, both arms and legs hanging loosely to the ground, his head on your lap.

“It totally is,” he muttered, barely audible because his face was nuzzled between your crossed legs.

“If you say so bubbs,” you said and tried not to laugh, your fingers playing with some strands of hair.

“Miss Y/LN what is the answer to question 4?” the professor asked you and totally ripped you out of your thoughts. “Oh shit...class.” you cursed and looked over your notes before unmuting yourself “the national bank sir?” you tried but it sounded more like a question than a confident answer.

“I know you're sitting at home and this is a difficult situation for all of us but don’t get distracted. We don't want your grades slipping…” you nodded and shot charlie a quick look. He half layed on your lap for the rest of the day, drawing little patterns on your legs, occasionally he got up to get a glass of water or some notebooks for you.

You liked to say that he annoyed you and sometimes he really did but you mostly found it endearing. But he did know how to distract you.

“I’m gonna work out here alright?” he questioned and put down his weights he took out of a closet in the hall. To focused on your note writing, your professor's voice ringing through the room you only nodded your head and barely looked up.

As your professor started to ramble on and on about a topic that you already had last semester, your eyes started to wander through the room and got stuck on a particular thing. The thing was working out and still looked absolutely delicious, he was currently lifting weights and his cake was on full display for you.

A tone shift of your professor brought you back to the zoom class but it didn't take long for you to be distracted again. After his workout, Charlie showered and was now just casually chilling shirtless on the couch a couple of feet away from you. His new tattoo shining brightly in your direction.

“What is more important than my class Miss Y/LN?” the same teacher that always catches you slacking piped up. Charlie's head shot up and he winked at you. “J-just a bird,” you said shyly, your cheeks heating up.

Not even ten minutes later, there was a movement in the corner of your camera. You tried to ignore it and listen to one of your classmates' presentations.

“You also want a coffee?” Charlie asked you over the counter.

“Yes please.” you shot him a thumbs up.

Whilst the coffee machine was rattling in the background, your classmate finished the presentation and that meant that it was your turn. Time Management was never you and Charlie's strength and so just as you were in the spotlight option of the call, Charlie walked up behind you.

“Char..I-” you tried to stop him.

“Here is your coffee ma love,” he said lovingly, still shirtless by the way, bending down to give you a kiss on your shoulder before placing the cup on your table. You awkwardly froze and stared at the screen in front of you.

“That’s a funny bird.” was all that your professor said while another classmate piped up with a “He’s kinda hot.”

“So uhm…” you chuckled, your cheeks and ears bright red. “I choose this topic because…”

[corpsedaydream]

paint wars

aaaaaaaand here it is! my first corpse!angst fic!

this was a lot of fun to write, i’ve been posting so much fluff, and as much fun as i’ve had fluffing it up, it felt good to get back to what i love. i normally only do angst!

a little disclaimer: i do not know corpse, this writing is purely fictional and for entertainment purposes only!

happy reading!

word cout: 2080

_______________________________

paint wars

Third wheeling had never really bothered you before. Partly because you were the type of person who could make your own fun. But also because you were so close with your friends that you normally did become friends with the people they were dating, too. So hanging out with a couple never really felt like third feeling for you.

Except today, you were feeling a little ruffled about it.

It was meant to be such a good day. Currently, you were out with your best friend and the person she was seeing - someone in which you’d started to become friends with - and the three of you were painting at the park. An afternoon of painting and sharing a bottle of wine was an activity in which you did with your friends every now and again and if someone happened to be seeing someone, they were welcome to bring them along. You’d always thought that the person you were dating would experience it too, except he wasn’t.

Corpse was at his place.

You’d attempted to involve him earlier.

-

“Please come, it’ll be fun, I promise.” Your voice was still upbeat then as you spoke to Corpse on the phone, trying to persuade him into joining you.

“I won’t have fun.” He was holding his ground firmly.

“Not with that attitude, you won’t.” Yet again, you were still trying to joke around, hoping it would make him feel better. It didn’t. 

“It’s more than just an attitude, (Y/N).” He responded so glumly.

You sighed in response and looked at your phone screen, it showed you’d been on the phone for 23 minutes, pretty much all of which was you trying to get your boyfriend to come have some fun with you. You knew it was hard for him, you’d been so understanding, but you couldn’t deny you’d gotten your hopes up that today would have been an easy enough outing for him to participate. You were tempted to press the red hang up button because he was bringing your mood down and today was meant to be a good day. But his voice came through the speaker on the phone call again before you could.

“How about, you go have fun and you can come round here after and show me your painting.”

“No.” You knew he was trying to make you feel better this time, but that wasn’t a compromise you wanted to take part in.

“Why not?”

“What if I want to keep hanging out with my friends after we’re done?”

“Then hang out, I don’t mind.”

“That’s the issue, you should mind, you should want to spend time with me.”

“I do want to spend time with you.”

“Then do it!” You got a little louder that time, frustration filling you.

He sighed that time. No one was winning this conversation that was quickly turning into an argument. So you decided to try again.

“My friends are good people, Corpse, I’ve known them forever, you’d really like them and they’d liked you. They wouldn’t say or do anything that-”

“I fucking know, okay?!” He cut you off, and it seemed it was his turn to raise his voice. “Fuck, (Y/N), I know. You talk about them all the fucking time. I get it, you’ve got these fucking amazing people in your life and I just can’t fucking compete.”

“What the fuck?” You couldn’t help but to respond, you knew his anxiety was getting the better of him but he snapped at you and now you were snapping back. “You’re seriously angry at me for having good friends?”

“No!” He yelled then and even through a phone call it caught you by surprise.

“Then why are you yelling at me right now?!” You questioned him, ironically also beginning to yell.

“Because- fuck. I don’t fucking know,” He sounded a lot closer to his phone then, as if he’d picked it up and had it closer to his face. “I’m going, I’ll see you later, or not, do whatever you want.”

And before you could say anything, he hung up.

You sat there looking at your lock screen, a photo of you and Corpse. The first photo you’d ever taken together, you were both so happy that day. You were all glammed up in the photo, you were going out and Corpse couldn’t stop telling you how pretty you looked.

-

“Baby, stop,” But you were giggling, so Corpse continued dotting rapid fire kisses all over your face. “you’re gonna mess up my make up.” You told him, but you were smiling so wide as your hands were pressed against his chest, pushing him up, but you were also having too much fun with him so you didn’t really try so hard.

“I can’t,” Corpse replied, his arms were locked around your waist, and the kisses stopped for a moment so he could bring his face in front of yours to look at you once more. “Oh, my baby, you do look so beautiful.”

He took your breath away with his words, your heart felt like it was doubling in size with how much he had made its way into it. And this time, you kissed him, but on his mouth and he kissed you back, hard. Your hands slid up from his chest and to either side of his neck and his gripped your sides. How you loved to feel so wrapped up in him.

“I don’t want to leave.” You whispered when you broke apart, your faces still close enough that your nose brushed against his.

“Then stay.” His deep voice could almost convince you, but you hadn’t seen your friends in a little while, you’d been inside the loved up bubble with your boyfriend. Your friends knew that, so they let you be, at least for a while and when they missed you too much, they demanded that this time you had to come out. You’d made a commitment to go out with them, and you wanted to see them. Corpse was invited, too. After all, your friends wanted to meet the man who had been taking up so much of your time, but he wasn’t up for it yet.

“I can’t.” You’d sigh.

“I know.”

“You could come...” You tried to invite him one last time.

“Baby.” Was all he said, dropping his head to rest it on your shoulder. He knew he had disappointed you when he turned down the offer the first time and he didn’t want to disappoint you, ever.

“I know, but, my friends really want to meet you.”

“And they will,” He looked back at you then, “just not yet.”

“Another time, then?”

“Yeah.”

“Promise?”

“I promise.”

-

But he still hadn’t followed through on that promise. You didn’t mind then, things were still kind of new between the two of you and you remember thinking that he’d keep his word. Your friends were so important to you, and he knew that, so you’d really thought that if you waited it out it would happen. 

But it hadn’t, and you were running out of patience.

Looking around the park, it really felt like the universe was just wanting to hit you down more, because it seemed that every person you looked at, really seemed to be in a couple. 

At one point, you were watching a dog who just fetched a ball. Thinking you’d found the only other soul here who wasn’t rubbing a relationship in your face. But then from behind a tree, another dog appeared and they started licking each others faces.

“Oh my fucking god.” You exclaimed and swapped your vision back to the painting you had completed. You were done with today. And you let your thoughts be heard then.

“You alright?” Your friend had heard you.

“Uh, I guess. I don’t know.” You answered honestly. And you didn’t know. Could you keep being in a relationship with someone when your differences were causing this divide?

“What if I just come over to his place with you?” Your best friend suggested. She knew exactly what was stirring at you, she’d listened to you vent about it many of times.

“Like, without him knowing?”

“Yeah.” It was a very her thing to suggest. You’d grown up with her and she always was a person who turned up unannounced, it was a rarity to find someone like that but she was that person. But she was also such a calming presence that no one ever minded and instead, welcomed it. You contemplated her idea, it was just the two of you now, the person she was dating had left a little earlier.

“It could go very bad.”

“It could go very good.”

-

And so there you were, walking up to Corpses front door. With your best friend waiting in the car. You were at least going to give him even a tiny bit of warning of what was going to happen.

The front door swung open, “Hey,” he greeted you, he was expecting you after you texted him to see if it was okay if you’d still come over.

“Hi.” You were nervous.

“Get in here.” He waved you in and so you stepped inside and he met you in a hug. “You okay?” He questioned you, he noted something about you seeming a little off.

“Yeah, just a little tired.” It was the oldest lie in the book, and you and Corpse both knew that but he was going to let it go.

“Where’s the painting?” A change of subject now that you’d both taken a few steps inside his place.

“Oh, I left it in the car,” You started, turning to face him.

“Okay.... did you want to get it, or?” He wondered why things felt so off balance. Yes, your last phone call didn’t end very pleasantly but he knew you, if you wanted to talk to him about that, you would.

“Well, I could get (Y/F/N) to bring it in.”

“What?” Instantly his mood changed. His face hardened, his posture stiffened.

“She’s in the car, she-”

“What the fuck, (Y/N)?!” Already his voice was raising.

“She just wants to meet you!”

“You didn’t think to ask me about this?”

“She’s my best friend, Corpse, I didn’t think you’d mind.”

He turned away from you and picked up a glass from his bench top, smashing it into the floor. You jumped and took a step back. For a moment, everything was so silent but the tension couldn’t have been louder.

With tears bubbling in your eyes, you decided on trying to cut through the thick silence. “Corpse-”

“No.” He instantly cut you off, turning to face you. Both of you had shaky hands. You should have been comforting each other, making an effort to calm one another, but instead, you took it out on one another, peaking each others anxiety and frustrations level even more. “You really fucked-

“No!” You cut him off this time, blinking back your tears and stepping towards him. “You don’t get to treat me like this right now, you’re overreact-”

“Don’t fucking finish that word. You’re the one who brought someone here without me knowing!”

“She’s not just someone, she’s my best friend!”

“Your best friend. Not mine, (Y/N).” He stepped towards you then. “Did you really not think about how fucking stupid this was?” His words stung like venom. “I don’t even want her knowing what I look like, let alone where I fucking live!”

“She- she wouldn’t...” Your voice trailed off. He was right in your face, he was yelling. But could you blame him right now? You were feeling guilty for causing this, you were feeling so distraught that things had gone this badly. 

“Just get out.” He told you plainly, moving back away from you and turning so his back was towards you.

“What?” You stared hopelessly at the back of his head of curls.

“Fuck off.”

“We can talk about this.”

“No. I don’t want you here.” His words were crushing your heart, you could barely take a full breath in. You had anticipated a bad reaction, but you hadn’t hoped it would go this bad.

“If you kick me out like this, I’m never coming back.” You threatened, despite how much it pained you to say those words.

Corpse looked back at you then over his shoulder, you both had challenging expressions on your face. You were fighting fire with fire, things were burning down, fast.

“Good.”

[yandere-daydreams]

Id bet money that yandere!bakugou watches his darling sleep. He just HAS to. He cant help himself.

You bet your ass he does. And, if I’m any good at this whole writing thing, he does so with as much repressed paranoia as possible. It’d be the closest thing he has to an actual hobby, honestly, but that doesn’t mean he enjoys it. That’d just be out of character.

Title: Loving Observation.

TW: Unhealthy Relationships, Slight Codependence, and Mentions of Somnophilia. 

~

It wasn’t like Katsuki liked watching you sleep.

That was much was common sense. Of course he didn’t like it, of course he didn’t enjoy it, who would? He’d heard stories of guys getting off on the vulnerability, the helplessness, the secrecy, but vulnerability and helplessness and weakness weren’t the kinds of things Katsuki was interested in. Staying up all night was boring. He was always exhausted the next day, always irritated, and he always told himself he wouldn’t do it again the next night, that’d he’d sleep by your side and resist the urge to perch himself at the foot of your bed and stare you down with all the intensity of a bird of prey. But, it was the next night, and here he was, standing guard with all the loyalty of a well-trained pet.

Momentarily, he wondered if he’d start growing feathers, if he kept this up.

It wasn’t that he couldn’t sleep, either. He was sure he’d be able to, and if not, Katsuki was always the type to make the best of his insomnia, he’d never liked the idea of wasting so many precious, undisturbed hours on a staring contest with the ceiling. No, if he hadn’t been able to sleep, he’d be researching the villain he’d have to track down in the morning, or meal-planning, or doing anything besides fisting at the sheets and watching you - tired, beautiful, narcoleptic you - drool onto your pillow and kick your comforter into the space he should be occupying, a habit he knew you’d never fight off. He could sleep, it’d be easy to, but he couldn’t let himself sleep. He couldn’t take that risk. He couldn’t be so careless. He couldn’t do something that dangerous and wake up to a corpse, as his reward. He couldn’t let you down like that.

So, he dug his nails into his hand, letting soothing, awakening pain run from the heel of his palm into his wrist until it infected the tips of his fingers and made the rest of the world a little more vivid. Until it made him a little more aware.

You must’ve been used to falling asleep without him, by now. There was always an effort, an extra cup of coffee or a slurred declaration that you weren’t going to bed until he found the time to carry you there, but you’d worked late, tonight, and you’d been ready to collapse the moment you dragged yourself into his apartment. He’d blamed himself for that, too - if he was really as good of a boyfriend as you thought he was, he wouldn’t let you work yourself to the point of exhaustion. But, he’d been called out for an emergency, and by the time he got home, you were already out, undressed and unconscious under the assumption that he’d join you whenever he was ready to, and you’d be able to make it up to him in the morning with a kiss and an apology for wearing yourself out. 

He wanted that. You couldn’t imagine how badly he wanted that. It was the kind of domestic, private bliss he’d come to crave, since you two first moved in together, and yet, he couldn’t bring himself to indulge in it. Holding you was just too tempting, too innocent. A million things could go wrong as soon as wrapped his arms around you. He could roll over and break your arm, he could hold you too tightly and suffocate you, he could do something wrong and hurt you, because punishing the people that loved him seemed to be the only thing he was good at doing. Because he would hurt you, if he let himself.

Because something else would hurt you, eventually, and he’d be the one to blame.

So wrapped up in his own thoughts, he almost didn’t notice when you rolled over, a small groan forcing itself through your parted lips as you settled onto your back, your hands drifting from your pillow to your sides, and then to your chest, another sound of discomfort drawing his attention to your current position. The air fled from his lungs only to hitch in his throat, and for a moment, he watched as you went still. Mentally, he went through your schedule, through the hours of the day, through every risk you’d taken and ever hazard he’d forced you into. Your job was draining, but it wasn’t dangerous, he’d made sure of that. You took the safest route home he’d been able to find, and he’d been slipping supplements into your food for weeks, a habit you wouldn’t approve of, but one he took to keep you healthy, to keep you safe. Still, there was too much that wasn’t accounted for. There was too much he didn’t know. There were too many things he hadn’t seen because you were so independent and because he was a failure of a guardian and because you must hate him--

Your expression contorted from neutrality to pained discomfort, and Katsuki stopped thinking.

In an instant, he was on top of you, straddling your stomach as he took you by the shoulders, wrenching you upward with all the frantic desperation of a soldier under fire. There was no blood, no injury, but an invisible threat was so, so much worse than a wound he could see and evaluate and fix on his own. Your eyes flew open, your hands finding his in less than a second, but your scream was swallowed down as your shock turned to confusion and that confusion faded into bleary, startled concern. You didn’t try to push him away, didn’t writhe or struggle out of his grip, only scanning over his wide-eyed, panicked expression as you collapsed back onto the mattress, adrenaline dissolving into little more than an unpleasant fatigue. That was good, that was great. You were fine, you were alright, you were perfect. He was just being paranoid, you were…

You were glaring at him.

Fuck, right. He probably deserved that.

“What is it?” You spoke slowly, your voice weighed down by sleep. Already, you were settling back down, and a second later, Katsuki followed your lead, falling to your side and keeping to himself until he felt a tap to his forearm, a signal that you weren’t that mad at him. Hesitantly, he uncurled himself, letting you burrow into his chest, your arm soon draped over his waist and your head resting on his bicep. You didn’t seem to care that he didn’t return the gesture. “Better think of something good, ‘suki. If the building’s not on fire, someone’s gonna sleep on the couch.”

He chuckled, dryly, more at the idea of him sleeping at all than to indulge your idle threat. “I thought... I mean, you looked like you were in pain,” He admitted, knowing you wouldn’t remember this conversation clearly enough to recognize the implications. “I was worried. You know how I get, about you.”

“I know how you get about everything.” There was a sigh, this time, a slight lean in his direction. Without a second thought, he plucked the comforter from where it draped over the side of the bed, laying it over your tense form despite your earlier attempts to free yourself from its plush entrapment. Immediately, you relaxed against him, thanking Katsuki with a small smile and a soft kiss to his collarbone. “This is the third time I’ve ‘been in pain’ this week. I know you’re just being protective, and I know you’re trying to help, but--” Despite the darkened bedroom, you averted your gaze. As you went on, your tone became a little more lucid, a little more genuine. His heart twisted in his chest, and Katsuki wondered if it’d be less painful to make you think he hadn’t cared at all. “The way you’ve been acting is really starting to bother me. You’re not getting any rest, and you’ve been so erratic, lately. It’s hard not to feel like this is....” You paused, biting the inside of your cheek. “Like this is bad for us.” 

It was futile to deny it. Assuring you was probably just as useless, but it felt like the right thing to do. “I know, baby. But I’m trying to--”

“Promise me.” You were clinging to him, now, your words muffled by his skin. “You have to promise me this is going to end. I don’t know what I’d do if I had to...”

You didn’t have to finish. Katsuki knew what you were going to say, and he knew it was as terrifying for you as it was for him. He didn’t want to leave you. He didn’t want you to leave him, even if he knew it was for his own good. He wanted things to be better, but he couldn’t stop, not if he wanted you to be protected, not if he wanted you to be safe. He wouldn’t be able to stop worrying, not unless he found a way to make sure he didn’t have anything to worry about.

It was an awful thought. An awful thing to even consider doing to another person. It was awful, and yet, he found himself pulling you closer, his body going slack as he finally let himself relax. It’d be awful, but it’d be safe, too. And it wasn’t like you were giving him much of a choice.

Giving you up wasn’t an option. You’d suffer, but you’d be secured and bound and safe, and it wasn’t like he couldn’t take care of you. He was a good boyfriend, or, he was really trying to be one, at least, and doing something so extreme, something so permant, would only prove he was more devoted, more capable, more loving. Even if he doubted you’d see it that way. 

From his experience, people usually didn’t react well to waking up in handcuffs. 

Not at first, at least. 

“I promise.”

[beautifulsnake2162020]

Ikevamp headcanons after watching Hamilton

Quick disclaimer: Yes I know this is a show about people who had owned slaves and slavery is bad. Having said that there's a reason why we suspend disbelief for a couple of hours and just allow ourselves to be swept into the story. I also love Phantom of the Opera but I also am aware that this is a story that involves an abusive and toxic relationship. The point is that I am aware that there are problems that needs to be discussed, but I still love the music, the story and the shows okay. This is just fan content not meant to be taken seriously and is just for fun. Okay? Now let's proceed.

I'll be doing Will and Arthur first since I'm currently doing Shakespeare's route and was inspired to do this after MC watches Romeo and Juliet with Vincent and I was wondering how Will would react to watching Hamilton. And Arthur is here because he is my husband/main lover. I might do Mozart and Napoleon next.

SPOILER ALERT: For anyone who hasn't seen the Disney Plus version of Hamilton, there might be some spoilers here (unless you already saw the show or know the story that is).

General Scenario:

You don't know how but Le Comte was able to get the filmed version of Hamilton, a musical which you've told Sebastian that you've been dying to see but was never able to because tickets were always sold out and entering the lottery was going to be a little too expensive for someone who lives in Japan and who doesn't exactly have the money or the time to simply fly to New York if in case she won. You were also excited because apparently Le Comte was able to modify the 21st century tech room that you use for your online classes and was able to get a wide screen and high quality surround sound which made you appreciate his efforts. A part of you was also curious as to how the other residents would react. You were scared that some of them might take offense, especially Napoleon who knew one of the characters in the show in real life. Would they react weirdly for seeing people different from them portray people that they knew? You were also wondering if they might even appreciate some of the 21st century slang that you and Sebastian would sometimes slip back into whenever it was just the two of you alone. After talking it out with everyone and explaining a few more things (like how its probably going to be different since it is a series of captured pictures-or at least that's your closest analogy- being played super fast with the synchronized sound of the actors- or what you were almost tempted to call "Techno Magic") during a dinner in which Shakespeare had decided to be present in, they were actually interested in what this show is about. Napoleon convinced you that he's fine and actually someone else playing Lafayette might even help with the suspension of disbelief since its been awhile since he has last met him anyway. Will even mentioned that while he has read and heard about stories from America, this is probably going to be the first story or production he's going to see from it. The only one who showed any hesitation - to no one's surprise - was Mozart, since he is attached to the kind of music he is familiar with (aren't we all?). But after prodding from both Jean, Le Comte and you giving him the puppy eyes, he finally relents. The day comes when everyone was once again free and for practicality everyone decided to have a meal first so that they won't be hungry during the show and also for you, Le Comte, and Sebastian to explain a few things everyone else may need to know to truly appreciate the show (like how the Presidential system and elections worked during the setting, what the word "Rewind" means, what is beatboxing, etc). So finally everyone gathered into the tech room after the meal, the lights were dimmed and once everyone was settled, you hit play. And as self-predicted of you, you find yourself crying in the end.

William Shakespeare (I'm still doing his route so please don't hate me if I get him wrong. Also no spoilers please).

- He was a bit shocked at first by how exactly up close you could see the facial expressions of the actors as well as the various ways it would cut to another person. He could now understand why you struggled with trying to explain how its played in a theatre but not exactly like the theatrical experience. But as you saw in your periphery, by the time Philippa Soo sings her first line, Will had already adjusted and allowed himself to be an audience and shut off his director and actor mindset (for the most part at least).

- While he didn't specialize in musicals, he found himself paying attention to the story of "the ten dollar founding father without a father." He knows how music could help both the actors and the audience in succumbing to their emotions in a scene and to suspend disbelief from reality. In his productions the words are not overwhelmed by any score but rather complemented to bring out the emotion he wants to evoke and for actors to show. Since many parts of the show has been influenced by the spoken word style without completely removing it from being sung, he has become enlightened with how powerful a show can be when it is done right.

- He not only enjoyed the story (especially the flow of it) and the production (especially some of the more technical details that the other residents hadn't noticed as far as a stage production is concerned), he loved that even the ensemble members had good acting and some of the onstage humor. One of the meta things he enjoyed was the obvious reference to his most superstitious work.

- Once you've seen how he loves analyzing the technical details of the production, you excitedly tell him about a special member of the ensemble who is known as "The bullet" among fans of the show. You could see him being enlightened as he watches the show with you again (this time with just the two of you) and he now sees "the bullet" and the way she interacts with the characters in a whole different light. He was so impressed with this idea that he may have adapted it into one of his new original plays (its not a copy paste of Hamilton's "bullet" but he definitely adapted assigning a member of the ensemble to have a special role that may not be significant at first, but he heavily notes that this member would have to be unique in interacting with any of the other characters).

- He didn't know what to expect from a 21st Century production but he found himself impressed with the prose and writing of various raps and songs. His favorite from Act 1 in terms of rhyme schemes was "Right Hand Man" and from Act 2 it was Jefferson's rap in "Washington by your side". And after settling down a bit his favorite emotional parts were "History has its eyes on you", "Hurricane", and "It's quiet uptown".

- He was impressed with how the double roles was given and how it actually is true for both of their roles in both acts. Ambiguity is one of his favorite things to have in a work, and he gives props to Lin for all the ambiguity he later realizes was in several parts of the show. If he and Arthur had been a little bit more closer, they probably would have bonded over the ambiguity Hamilton's comma in his letter to Angelica (see kids, grammar matters).

- A part of his brain wonders how the real life Hamilton would react to this and if him and Burr would still be enemies. But after some thinking he decides its not worth his efforts of asking anyone to bring them back since a wonderful production of their life has already been made even if it may not necessarily reflect who they truly are. He of all people knew what it's like to be inspired by great figures, it was fortunate that Lin Manuel Miranda decided to make a show about them before he had the chance to.

- You explain that in America Hamilton is one of the lesser known founding fathers of their nation and how it may be because his political opponents later on became Presidents and therefore was able to form the narrative. He becomes inspired by it and begins to search out people or stories who are hidden gems who may not be historically famous but had much more interesting stories than some of the ones he has heard of.

- Afterwards once you are sure that he has gotten comfortable enough with the genre you show him various videos of people rapping to his works and his reactions range from impressed to amused to "that's not what I mean when I wrote that" and you had to calm him down and explain that they can't hear him anyway after he started giving serious critiques on what the text means.

Arthur Conan Doyle

- While he was knowledgeable about many things, America's founding fathers was not one of them. He along with the other residents have gotten used to any rumors or exaggerated accounts of their lives and you and Sebastian have already warned that this is just a fictionalized production of the real person. As a writer of some historical fiction books he argued that he of all people was aware that any work based on history will speak more about the creators rather than the actual people they are writing about most of the time. He was nevertheless interested as to why you have become fascinated with the treasury secretary (and maybe it was with a twinge of jealousy that you began to expressly show admiration to another man even if he wasn't among the residents in the mansion). After all unlike many other residents of the mansion, on the surface it seemed that Hamilton was similar to Theo who mainly played a supporting but crucial role to his brother. He was thankful that you didn't hold it against him and was comforted that you were in a similar place. You even told him that the only thing you really knew about Hamilton before listening to the soundtrack and watching "Animatics" was that he was in the ten dollar American bill.

- And as someone who has delved into writing historical fictions, this was probably one of the most entertaining productions about a historical figure he has seen. He's going to be honest with you in that at first he was wondering if revealing Burr shot Hamilton in the opening was going to hinder him from enjoying the show; but he was pleasantly surprised that this was not the case at all. As a matter of fact it now made him want to find out who the real Hamilton was (although a part of him doubts if the real Hamilton had any regrets at all). According to him, this is why as a fictionalized historical work, the show is a success because it makes you want to find out more about the events and figures of the story (even if it means looking at darker realities that they did). And while the real Hamilton may be a lot different from what was shown, with all the things he went through and all the things he has done (for better or worse), he now wonders why exactly Le Comte hadn't approached him since he seems to be no better or worse than the average resident ("He and Newt could probably discuss mathematics all day."). You then explained that his political rivals (Jefferson and Madison from the show, and Monroe who wasn't shown in the musical) had later on become Presidents and was able to shape the narrative away from Hamilton. "Ron Chernow made Hamilton's biography because he was the lesser known founding father who was fading into obscurity among Americans and Lin read the book and recognized the story of someone who has risen through his writings. And to Lin that was also the story of hiphop." While he wasn't involved in politics as much as Hamilton was, Arthur had enough experience to know what it feels like to have those kinds of people in power. He also knows just how powerful it is to be in "the room where it happened" and how sometimes the real decisions weren't being made in an office but rather in either a private party or the right bar when people in power had their guard down and were more susceptible to being influenced.

- He could relate a lot with Hamilton on many things that he's only comfortable allowing either you or Theo to see. From being just so much more aware of death's inevitability coming for every living thing to survivor's guilt even though a part of him knows its irrational (but sometimes the emotional nonsense just overtakes our perspectives and actions). It's why he could understand Hamilton's need to write as much as he can before he dies. It's why for a time in his human life he had deviated from writing about Holmes and ventured into other genres. He could also relate to the need to prove what type of person he was, and how to go beyond his tragedies to serve people in their own ways. Hamilton did it as a soldier and the creator of America's financial system. And he is doing it as an informally practicing doctor and as a writer. It's a need that he's trying to mitigate since you've repeatedly told him that he doesn't need to prove anything to you or to anyone and to write whatever he pleases. But he also can't deny that it's still somewhere lodged in the back of his head.

- Just like William Shakespeare, in terms of the wordplay found in rap and the ambiguity present in the show and how those things were executed made him amazed and momentarily speechless. He was especially fanboying about "The comma after dearest" and how this essentially shows how important grammar was. It went to the extent that afterwards whenever he would write to you he would address you either as "My dearest, Y/N" or "My darling, Y/N" with special emphasis on the comma (sometimes you could see how there's more ink in the comma than some of the actual words. That's how much he wants to emphasize that you hold the title of dearest or darling). And you excitedly share with him some of the trivia knowledge of the show (like how in real life it was Angelica who originally made the comma mistake by writing to Hamilton as "My dear, sir" in one of her letters and it was Hamilton who was asking her what the comma means and even replied with "Ma chere, soeur") and how Angelica really did reference the Icarus metaphor in one of her letters to Eliza. And even though he wasn't a major musical nerd (he sang for fun), he would now join you in watching Howard Ho's Hamilton videos musically analyzing Hamilton (and would probably try to find a way to use this knowledge to annoy Mozart in some way).

- Speaking of music: Maybe it's because he's biased in his love for you but aside from Sebastian he's probably the one who has no qualms about the hiphop genre and was immediately into the various wordplays that rapping allowed. And because of this his favorite characters in terms of rapping are the ones played by Daveed Diggs (probably more than Hamilton himself even though you've explained that Lin is the one who wrote the whole thing). He even adapts to how Daveed as Jefferson would say Isaac's third law and incorporated it into his "let's tease Newton" kit. That's when you know he really loves Daveed Diggs ("Every action has an equal opposite -" "WILL YOU PLEASE STOP SAYING IT THAT WAY?! I didn't mind the first few times but this is ridiculous Arthur" "It must be nice, it must be nice to have a Newton on your side"). And his favorite character emotionally was Angelica (her raps in Schuyler Sisters and Satisfied may have helped).

- Speaking of the Schuyler Sisters, after watching it with you another time (this time with just the two of you) one of his favorite things to say is that you've got the best of all three sisters within you (Angelica's wittiness and intelligence, Eliza's cares for the more important things in life, and Peggy's humor) with the sexiness of Maria Reynolds. But because he sees all 4 of them in you he has the benefit of not needing to choose among them. Having said that there will be a period wherein he teases you if he makes you "Helpless" or "Satisfied" (and you respond either by kissing him or singing "That would be enough").

- Whenever you would sing as one of the Schuyler sisters he will join you as any of the male characters the moment he masters the soundtrack and could even sing it without the music. His favorite rap songs are "Guns and Ships", "Washington on your side", and of course "Satisfied". He also really loves "Non-stop", "the 10 duel commandments", and "The room where it happened". But his favorite sequence is from "the Winter's Ball" all the way to "Wait for it". Since it has romance, a shocking revelation, and gives insight to the perspective of the antagonist. He's also one of the first people to attempt to learn the choreography whenever he's in one of his mental blocks in writing. Of course he makes sure not to injure himself.

- He posts song lyrics to keep himself motivated in his times of mental block "There's a million things I haven't done. But just you wait" and "I'm not throwing away my shot" frequently appear around his desk.

-And whenever he's feeling low or insecure, just like Eliza you remind him to "Look around, Look around, how lucky we are to be alive right now."

[obeyme-kaidii-writes]

Panties

Mammon x gn!MC

Words - 1963

Content Warnings - lots of fluff, just a brief smidge of angst, my attempt at humor, relationships with the boys are open to interpretation 

Prompt/Inspiration - none

Summary - You return home to the House of Lamentation one day to find an absolute shit show waiting for you. 

AO3

As soon as you opened the door to the House of Lamentation, you could tell something wasn’t quite right. Raised voices could be heard filling the halls, but you were unable to quite make out what they were saying.

You followed the sound of the commotion to its source and were soon standing in the doorway to the library. All the brothers had gathered there and were too busy arguing to notice you.

There didn’t seem to be any sort of emergency. No one was bleeding at least.

But as your eyes scanned the room, they finally landed on a brightly colored bunch of fabric in Asmo’s hand that he was holding up for all to see.

You recognized it immediately.

It was your underwear.

You could feel the heat rising to your cheeks. You were mortified. What the hell could they possibly be discussing that involves your underwear in the middle of the afternoon?! Just as you were about to start tearing into them, you managed to catch some snippets of the conversation.

“OMG Mammon! You’re a panty snatcher! This is like a scene from an anime. I can’t believe this happens IRL.”

“I knew you were a pervert, but this is just depraved. Even for you.”

“Such a scumbag. Isn’t it enough to try and steal their things? Do you have to take their underwear too? Really?”

You shifted your attention to Mammon, who was standing at the front of the group, desperately trying to defend himself. His face was flushed, all the way down his neck. So intense was his blush, that even his tanned skin couldn’t conceal it. You don’t think you had possibly ever seen him so embarrassed as he stumbled over his words, and stuttered out excuses.

Well, this wasn’t going to do.

You took a deep breath to calm yourself, and plastered a wide smile on your face. As you made your approach, Mammon was the first to notice you. He snapped his mouth shut as all the color drained from his face. It was bad enough having his brothers yell at him. But now you were here. And he was utterly screwed. His mind started racing, struggling to figure out a way to explain this to you and still maintain your relationship. Before he could say anything though, Asmo spoke up.

“Oh! There you are dear. You’ll never guess what our pervert of a brother was up to.”

“What’s up?”, you asked, playing innocent.

“We caught him with your underwear! In his pocket!”, Levi explained.

“Oh. That.”

You reached for the underwear that Asmo was holding, and unfolded it to get a good look at it, making a show out of confirming it was yours.

“I gave those to him. So what’s the problem?”

You turned to Mammon and returned the clothing to his own hand, and he quickly shoved it back into his pocket. He gaped at you, completely bewildered by what he was witnessing and unable to form a single coherent thought. You looked into his eyes and gave him a soft smile, completely different from the fake one you had on earlier. He wasn’t sure what the hell was going on, but he felt his body relax. For now, he was just going to go with it.

When you returned your attention to the rest of the group, they were completely silent, staring at you in shock. Satan, you could tell was quickly figuring out what was going on, and had realized how badly he and his brothers had fucked up.

“It’s not like y’all haven’t taken any pairs yourself,” you said as one by one, you made eye contact with each of them before they looked away. Only Lucifer attempted to hold your gaze, and you knew that was just his pride refusing to let him look away since a light blush dusted his cheeks.

“HUH?!” Mammon sputtered out. He looked at his brothers and all of them were in various states of embarrassment, now refusing to look anywhere near him or you. He couldn’t believe this. He was used to them picking on him, but for them to be such blatant hypocrites? What. The. Hell.

Levi attempted to defend himself, “wh wh what are you talking about?”

You snapped your head in his direction, eyes laser focused on him, “Do I need to go into detail? Really Levi? Think carefully.” Your tone of voice had turned icy. Playtime was over now, and you were not in the mood to put up with their shit. If they were still going to deny it, you were going to add to their humiliation by revealing the details that you were certain they were unaware you knew.

Levi flinched and decided to keep quiet, shrinking in on himself and trying to hide behind Beel as subtly as possible. He didn’t know why or how, but he had the feeling you knew a lot more than you had said so far and he wasn’t eager to find out exactly how much that was.

“Y’all might think you’re pretty sneaky, but when 6 demons start periodically swiping individual pairs of your underwear it adds up pretty fast. At least Asmo had the decency to take me shopping occasionally, the same can’t be said for the rest of you.”

The brothers continued to stand there in silence. Satisfied that you had put an end to the shit show you had walked in on, you turned to Mammon once again, tugging at his hand, “C’mon we had stuff to do, remember?”

“Uh. Yeah. Right.” He had no idea what you were talking about honestly, but now didn’t seem like a good time to point that out to you. You continued holding his hand as you led him to your bedroom in silence. Frankly he was too scared to speak. And really, really confused. His brothers had been stealing your underwear? And you knew…? He couldn’t wrap his mind around it.

Once safely inside your room, with the door closed behind you and your book bag discarded on the floor, you flopped down onto your bed, and let out a groan. Mammon remained by the doorway, frozen in place as his thoughts started to catch up with him. Even if his brothers were a bunch of lying hypocrites, he still had stolen your underwear. That was a fact. He had been caught red handed and there was no denying it. Not that he was even tempted to try at this point after watching you and how you handled his brothers just now.

What were you going to say to him? Should he just start begging for forgiveness now? Or should he wait for you to speak first? Would you even accept his apology? He was so disgusted with himself. I really am a scumbag, aren’t I? he thought. He was certain you were not going to want anything to do with him after this. He had violated your trust. Never before had he felt guilty about stealing something, but he honestly would have given anything to go back in time and not make the same mistake twice.

“....mmon. Mammon? You okay?”

He looked up to find you right next to him, calling his name and peering into his face with concern. Why were you still so worried about him? Even after knowing what he had done?

“S’rry,” was all he could manage, looking away again.

“Sorry? Oh about the underwear?”, you laughed and took one of his hands in your own, lacing your fingers together, “It’s fine, honest. I don’t care.”

“You don’t?” He looked at you, lost and confused. Why had you been so mad then?

“No, I don’t. I only got pissed earlier because everyone was ganging up on you when they were just as guilty themselves. Well, guiltier, if I’m being honest.”

You were smiling at him, with such a gentle look in your eyes. There was no trace of the anger from earlier on your face. You were telling the truth. And as he stared at you, a thought occurred to him.

“Guiltier? Whaddya mean?”

You laughed loudly at his question, before smirking and asking him, “Do you really want to know?”

He gave you an eager nod and you pulled him to your bed, before crawling in and curling up next to him as he joined you. Usually he was the one holding you when you cuddled during movie nights, or whenever else. But today you wrapped your arm around his shoulder, and he rested his head on your chest as you ran your fingers through his hair. With your free hand you once again reached for his and laced your fingers together.

“Well, Asmo I know has taken several pair. But like I said downstairs, he takes me shopping often and replaces them regularly. He’s probably the only reason I still have any underwear left at all.

Belphie has a couple different pairs that he keeps stashed under the pillows on his bed and in the attic. I try not to think about what he does with them while sleeping.

Beel actually doesn’t have any in his possession...but he has eaten them once or twice. To his credit, I’m pretty sure those were accidents.

Levi, poor guy, actually has a small shrine hidden in his closet behind his one for Ruri-chan. Now that was fun to discover. I’m pretty sure he’d spontaneously combust if I ever mentioned it to him directly,” you laughed at the thought of your precious otaku realizing you knew about his little homage to you. I should probably go check on him later, you thought, he was almost as sensitive as Mammon when it came to being embarrassed.

You felt Mammon laughing as well, and planted a small kiss to the top of his head before continuing.

“So that leaves Satan and Lucifer.

Satan only has one pair that he keeps hidden in a book that he stores under his mattress. I guess he figured I’d never find it there, but the hard lump is pretty obvious when you sit on his bed.

And finally, Lucifer. Dear, sweet Lucifer,” you couldn’t help but laugh as you thought about all the things he had done, unbeknownst to you as far as he was concerned, “Lucifer is the worst offender of them all. There’s a reason he hardly lets anyone into his private study.”

Mammon lifted his head to look at you, and his eyes were sparkling like he had just discovered the best kept secret, “Really? Lucy? He did that?”

You laughed again and continued, “Yeah, I made the mistake of browsing through his books in there while waiting for him once. Never again. I only bring my own books to read now.”

You resumed playing with Manmon’s hair as he settled back down, chuckling at the thought of his brother having a secret panty stash hidden within the bookshelves in his study. He’d have to check this out for himself one day. Just to verify it, ya know. Not because he wanted to steal another pair for himself or anything.

“Anyways, that’s why I’m not mad at you. You were actually the last one to take something from me, and judging by what I saw earlier, it only happened yesterday,” Mammon froze. He had forgotten about what had gotten him into this situation in the first place. And he certainly didn’t expect you to be able to tell what day he had taken them. Though, it shouldn’t have surprised him since the underwear featured a pretty distinct pattern.

“Can you do me a favor though?”

“Hmm?” Mammon hummed in response. He would do anything for you.

“Take me shopping later and help me pick out some new ones?”

[oftenderweapons]

sub jk?? 😶😶😶

Pairing: Jungkook x reader (nicknamed Candy)

Wordcount: 2,0k

Genre: drabble, pwp, fluff, established relationship

Rating: 18+

This was SO! MUCH! FUN! TO! WRITE! Thank you, nonnie. Also, sorry if I got carried away with wordcount, I couldn’t help it 😳🥴🥴🥴 This is literally pwp. Just a drabble where bestest boi Jeon Jungkook is super sweet and begs a lot. 

TRIGGER WARNINGS: sub!Jk (obvs), Domme!Reader; Candy is super horny and has a severe case of wandering hands. Brief handjob male receiving (just very casual palming); boobjob and blowjob; use of lube (again, let’s normalise using it); edging; hand pinning; mild mommy kink; grinding/humping with clothes off; praise kink; brief unprotected penetration (please don’t do that unless you and your partner(s) are safe); cockwarming; creampie; switch!Jk at the very very end.

Jeongguk standing at the kitchen counter, fixing breakfast, shirtless at the crack of dawn was something that always made you horny.

Simply watching those back muscles flex and flutter was a sight to behold.

He was humming a tune under his breath as he cut and cleaned an avocado, your chocolate milk already on a cup as it cooled down a little, so that you could drink it without burning your tongue. He always made it a bit hotter since he knew you always took your time before waking up — or rather, before getting out of bed.

Your feet padded softly against the linoleum floor, lazily walking toward him.

As you stood behind him, you placed your hands around his waist before sliding them to his front spreading your fingers against his taut abdomen, dragging them upward, toward his pectorals, flattening your palm against the thick muscles.

“Good morning to you,” he said with a teasing tone.

“'Morning,” you replied, placing your cheek between his shoulder blades.

“Your breakfast is ready.” He said, spreading some sliced strawberries over your toast.

“Mhhh...” You commented nuzzling your nose against his spine, your thumbs toying with his nipples. “How long do we have?”

“I have a free morning...” He said, chuckling.

“Free morning on a Saturday? Am I dreaming?” You asked, incredulous, letting one of your hands roam down, to the waistband of his sweats.

He stopped your wandering hand. “Are you feeling needy?” He asked, his chin resting on his shoulder as he looked at you from the corner of his eye.

“Can you blame me? You're hot first thing in the morning.” You said, standing on your tiptoes and kissing his nape.

He let go of your wrist, silently giving you the green light to slide your fingers into his sweats.

You inhaled his scent, leaning your forehead against him before tentatively teasing his pelvis by raking your nails gently against his skin.

“Do you want breakfast or shall we go back to bed?” He asked, feeling your small hand skim the sensitive length of his cock, up and down before wrapping your fingers around it, exploring how it hardened and fluttered and pulsed into life, tracing the spot where his shaft met his balls.

“Let's go to bed.” You murmured, cupping him and teasing his skin with the edge of your teeth.

He chuckled and tugged your hand out of his pants. “I need to walk.” He said, grinning down at you with the most mischievous expression.

As soon as you both reached the bedroom, he stood with his back to the bed, you standing right in front of him as he pulled his sweats down, taking them off entirely before sitting on the bed and crawling backward.

"Aren't you going to take off your shirt?" He asked, staring at you. "Well, my shirt, but you're wearing it..."

"Semantics," you commented, crawling toward him, settling down in between his spread legs and removing the problematic item.

"How do you want me?" He asked, sitting up, ready for you to direct him.

You pushed him with his back to the mattress, the soft light coming in through the blinds making the atmosphere intimate enough for a steamy rendezvous. “Just lay there,” you said, straddling his waist as you stretched to the bedside table, his hands landing on your ass lightly, your body laying on top of his as you fumbled with the drawer, finding a small plastic bottle and taking it with you, climbing down his body even though his hands felt so good groping your ass.

You kissed his strong thighs in the process, making sure that you teased them a little with your teeth and tongue. “Hands off,” you said as soon as you felt him touch your hair.

He obeyed. “Kinky.” He said grinning, crossing them behind his head and watching you get to

“Quiet.” You warned.

When he heard your voice, he immediately changed his attitude. “Sorry.”

You smirked and stood on your knees, uncapping the bottle and squeezing a line of lube from his base to his tip as his cock arched invitingly all the way to his belly, leaning slightly to the left. Looking at it felt almost forbidden at the beginning, but now here you were, considering how its proportions fit you perfectly, the long shaft matched with a less conspicuous girth. You doubted you could have handled him had he been even a millimeter thicker.

Drawing another line of lube, you heard him hiss.

You looked at him with a small sneer.

“Cold,” he pouted, as his glutes twitched with a tiny thrust.

You grinned and poured some lube on your palm, “Don’t worry, I’ll warm you up baby.” You said, leaning down, rubbing your wet hand to your chest, focusing on the valley between your breasts.

His eyes opened wide. “Oh god, yes.”

You smiled, placing your mouth on his thigh, tempting him before biting down, eliciting a tight growl.

“I said quiet.” You scolded him before caging his cock between your breasts. “You answer when I talk to you. Got it?”

He nodded quickly.

“Be verbal, baby.” You encouraged him.

He looked you in the eye, feeling slightly insecure, out of his depth. “Yes, Candy.”

“Good boy.” You said, sliding up and down, just once.

He began purring, but he managed to control himself, holding back after half a second.

“That’s my good boy.” You praised him again, watching as his arms started moving a little, struggling to stay still.

Slowly you gave him another pump. “Feels nice, sweetie?” You asked, looking up at his lovely face, scrunched up as he tried to restrain himself from pushing his hips against you.

“Feels nice, Candy. So nice.” He replied, trying to be ‘verbal’, as you had asked him, but also barely managing to stay sane.

You picked up your rhythm. “Look into my eyes, baby bun.” You called, staring at his sealed eyelids, waiting for them to flutter open.

Licking his lips, he obeyed, his dark pupils dilated because of the darkness and all the lust.

Lewdly, you lolled your tongue out, licking his tip and kissing it, sucking on it until it popped into your mouth, your teeth grazing the sensitive spot where his glans met his shaft, your head bobbing a couple times before you released him and started stroking him again.

"Oh god, Candy, I'm..." His eyes held your gaze for a second before you let go of your tits just slightly, reducing the pressure on him.

He threw his head back and groaned. “Please.”

Oh, that was the first of a long series. You meant to make him beg at least twenty times. Minimum.

You gave him a couple tentative licks, watching him catch his breath and unwind.

As soon as he looked like he had a grip, you went back on him with all your might, immediately sucking his tip aggressively while your boobs worked his shaft.

“Oh, please. Please, Candy, so good.” He whined, his voice so sweet as he softly, unconsciously switched to his satoori. “It’s too good.” He rumbled, giving a few thrusts up before you let go of your tits and placed your palms on his hips, pushing him down, momentarily denying him the privilege of your mouth.

“Stay put. No pushing.” You warned him, laying small pecks all the way from the base to the tip before swallowing him.

His arms immediately tried to go for your hair, but he managed to control himself and grip the sheets at his sides instead.

As you saw him behave, you added your boobs in the equation, immediately conjuring a moan from him that slowly turned into a breathy whimper. “Please, baby. I need you. Please, wanna cum. Lemme cum, I'll be so good to you.” He begged, desperate. “I've been so good.” He reiterated, trying to appeal for your mercy.

You pulled him out of your mouth and worked him with your hands a little. “You've been a good boy?” You asked, using your thumb to tease his slit, bringing your finger to your mouth once it was smeared in his precum.

“I've been so good.” His light voice contrasted with the tone he usually used for satoori. It was so sexy, the dragging of the vowels, the consonants with their smooth edges. It was a light mumbling.

You got on your knees and crawled until you found yourself straddling his hips.

“How good?” You asked, bracing your palms on his pecs, the pads of your thumbs circling the small areolae of his nipples, a few shades darker than his skin.

“I was making breakfast… I made you feel so good last night…” He tried to defend himself. “I'm always so good to you.” He babbled as he felt the warmth of your cunt cover his shaft. “Please, I'm your good boy. Please, Candy.”

Your pelvis started grinding against him.

“Please… I— I need it so bad. Please, baby.”

Your eyes rolled back as you felt his taut, slippery, hot flesh rub against your most intimate part. “What do you need, pretty boy?” You asked, moving one hand to cup his cheek.

“Inside, please, love.”He said, his abs twitching, his eyes struggling to stay open. You looked down, noticing his abdomen stained in a mix of lube and precum, pouring frequently and abundantly from his slit.

“So close…” He whimpered. “I'm begging you. Inside, Candy, ____.”

“Say the magic words, baby.” You said, licking your lips and smiling deviously as you felt him whine like the loveliest puppy.

“I love you, please inside…” He said, placing his hands on your ass. “Love you so much… God, Candy… I—”

You caught his wrists with a tut and pinned them atop of his head, stretching forward so that your breasts were bouncing right against his chest, your clit pressing more harshly against his sex.

“Please, Candy please, so good. Mommy please, inside.” He whimpered.

You felt your body melt. He'd never called you that before.

Never.

And you never thought you could like it, until it blossomed from his lips so gently and desperately, his body weak with tiny hiccups and moans, sweat covering his forehead, his soft chocolate locks fanned on the pillow like tender tendrils of darkness blooming around him.

“Mommy, please let me… I need it.” He cried out, his eyes watering as he opened them with so much difficulty.

Freeing one had, you brought it between your legs and slipped him in.

“Yes,” He moaned in relief, “thank you, mommy.” He said with a strained voice before you gave him a squeeze with your kegels.

Two thrusts and he was gone, completely blissed out, his eyes so grateful as they met yours before shutting down, his mouth opening in voiceless pleasure, his abs pulsing with the same pattern as his cock inside you, his chest staying wide and full for half a minute as he copiously spilled inside you, his lungs deflating as his high subsided, his seed pouring out of your hole and dribbling down his cock.

“Koo,” you said, letting his wrists go, his hands immediately coming for his face, covering his eyes.

“I'm so sorry, that's so embarrassing…” He said, trying to escape your curious gaze.

“It was so sweet, baby.” You said, kissing his cheek. “It was a little out of the blue, but it was really, really cute, Koo.” You said, nuzzling your nose against his jaw.

“It was amazing.” He said, hugging you to his chest. “And, I'm sorry for… That. I don't know what happened…”

“We can talk about that whenever you're ready. Or we can completely forget about it. Still, I think I sort of liked it…?” You said, dubious. “So I'd really like it if we talked about this sometime… Take it into consideration. If you're comfortable, that is.” You clarified.

Jeongguk looked at you silently for a minute. “Yes. Sure. I mean, I never really brought that up because it's something… It makes me vulnerable, but… I'd like it if we… took it into consideration.” He said, titubant but also relieved. “However…” He mused, “I think we have more pressing matters to consider.” He said, thrusting gently inside you before throwing you on your back.

All shyness gone, he spoke with a grin. “Your turn.”

[spookybias]

first time again ‣ [ yang jeongin ] ✧

pairing: yang jeongin x gn! reader

genre: comfort, angst, slice of life

synopsis: an attempt to return a love letter leads to a cycle of all too familiar events.

content: exes to almost lovers again, exes to friends au

warning: reader threatens to kill jeongin twice, insecurities, self-blame

for: @districtninewriters' dear skz, with love event. please be sure to check out all the fics written for this event! everyone in the net worked hard on them :)

word count: 2.4k

note: i want a jeongin :,)

You studied the envelope you were holding, flipping it over a few times in your hands. The quality of the paper was nicer than normal, almost like whatever was inside was more important than just a regular letter. You weren’t expecting anything, let alone anything important or special.

But it was definitely your name on the front.

You took in the minimalistic decoration of the beige envelope, mentally noting the small piece of looseleaf paper that had been torn at an aesthetic angle and taped down. Your name had been written in rainbow calligraphy on top of the looseleaf, a font you immediately recognized because your ex had used it plenty of times when decorating the tags on gift bags and appreciation cards to you. Each letter of your name casually leaked into an ombre of cool shades, and hand drawn sparkles littered the envelope.

You dreaded opening the letter, and wished you could stop feeling as blue as the ink your ex had used to write your name.

You were tempted to toss it in the trash, and bury it under the used romance novels you no longer wanted, but as quick as the urge to scream and throw away everything related to your ex had came, it had left.

Adrenaline coursed through you. Your fingertips were fast at ripping open the packaging, while your brain was hesitant to remember the pretty bleach-haired boy who had stolen your heart and then unintentionally crushed it just awhile ago.

Your ex's words were written on skyline stationary. Red and blue stripes twirled along the edges of the paper and a stamp of a smiley face followed by squiggly lines appeared at the top right corner. You were too scared to skim over a single paragraph. So you stood there, staring at the greeting instead.

I know this is sudden, ____.

Four minutes passed. And then you began to read.

You declined your group of friends' invitation to walk to the local bakery and then home with them after school. You had been holding in an immense amount of anger for your ex since you had read his letter to you last night. The letter could've easily been thrown in the trash after reading, but you couldn't help but become entangled in the words he spewed out into sentences.

It's not fair, You thought to yourself as you stomped up the stairs to the platform of the train station. It's not fair that he gets to remind me of everything and I don't get to say anything back to him. It's not fair that I have to think about why our relationship was so pretty.

"Pretty" is the word everyone used to describe the relationship you had with your ex. The both of you had taken it as a compliment back then, but now you knew why everyone referred to the two of you with such an adjective.

Pretty meant your relationship was attractive, it was pleasing to the eye on the outside, it was held at a fair degree. But what was it like on the inside? It was tame and decent, but complicated. Your ex always questioned what he truly felt for you, and it always made you wonder if you were doing something that made him doubtful.

Things had ended because you didn't want to feel more and more insecure as the days went by. It was fruitless to keep trying. Well, at least, it was to you.

"I'll kill him," you grumbled to yourself. A couple people waiting for the L train gave you a weird look. You tried to ignore their glances and the feeling of wanting to reminisce on the train ride you and your ex always shared before and after school during your relationship.

The two of you lived in the same apartment complex, but nowadays you did your absolute best to avoid him. You could've approached him there, instead, but you were so on edge you felt the need to return the letter before you got home. You had stopped taking the train a long time ago, too, desperately trying to avoid him at the train station as well. Now here you were trying to find him.

"I'll kill you!" You practically shouted at your ex. You grabbed him by his shirt collar and yanked him forward. You had forgotten what it had been like to stand so close to him, but you tried to ignore the blush that was pushing its way onto your face and the urge to pull him into a hug.

"What did I do?!" Yang Jeongin looked around awkwardly at the handful of people staring at both of you.

He was unsure of his emotions. One part of him was embarrassed by getting caught up in your sneak attack and the other part of him was happy that you were at least talking to him, even if you had just threatened his life. Jeongin was able to pry your hands -he had noticed how much smaller they were compared to his- off of him. He grabbed your hand and walked you towards an empty section of the platform.

Your heart fluttered, and when you glanced up as he pulled you along, you were seeing your surroundings in a sakura filter.

Jeongin stopped once you were at a spot without anyone around. "I-" He began to say, but you cut him off.

"Get your hands off of me!" You flailed your arms around until he took a step back.

Jeongin held his hands up in surrender. "Before you kill me, please tell me what I did."

"What is this?" You wasted no time in pulling out the crumpled envelope from Jeongin. "You're sending me love notes? After we already ended things?"

Jeongin looked like a deer caught in headlights. "H-how did you get that?"

"Your stupid ass sent it to me!"

"I- I did but-"

"Why?"

"Because I wanted you to know how much you mean to me."

"Well I don't care and I don't want this! I don't want you anymore!" You crumpled the envelope and letter into a ball and threw it at Jeongin's chest. It bounced off, and rolled onto the floor.

"Okay," Jeongin replied, his voice cracking. "You don't have to accept it. It was wrong of me to send you something after we had already broken up." He reached down for the crumpled up paper.

Jeongin held it up, hurt written across his features. The letter seemed to mean a lot to him, and even though he had hurt you in the past, you never wanted to make him feel bad.

You tried to snatch the mess you had made away from him but he held it up.

He furrowed his eyebrows, looking annoyed. "What?"

"Give it back," You told him, trying to reach the crumpled letter.

"You just said you didn't want it." It was unlike Jeongin to raise his voice. "If you don't want it then I'll take it back."

"Why?"

"Because I care about what I wrote in it and I want it!"

"Stop!" You continued your attempt to take it from him.

You and Jeongin fought over the crumpled papers like two nine-year-olds fighting over a toy truck. You were able to get a good grip on his love note. You were holding on to his love and you refused to let it go this time. You lied when you said when you didn't want him, and you yanked the paper towards you. Only it didn't come to you as a whole.

It ripped in half.

"Look what you did," Jeongin said, not realizing the weight of his words.

Look what you did, ____, You scolded yourself. You messed it up again.

That was the last straw. You were tired and frustrated and still heartbroken. You crouched down, head in your hands and tears slipping down your cheeks. You were nothing left but sniffles and sobs and torn pages and haunted by the word, "pretty".

"It's not fair," You choked out. "Why did you do this to me?"

"____," Jeongin had calmed down and reached out to you. "I'm sorry."

"No you're not," You told him. "Why did you send that if you didn't want to be with me anymore? What was the point of reminding me?"

Jeongin took a deep breath, gathering up whatever courage he had left. "Who says I don't want to be with you anymore? That's why I wrote you the letter. I'm just... not sure if you still want to be with me."

You didn't cut him off, so Jeongin took that as a chance to continue.

"I still think about you all the time. I wasn't sure how I felt about you when we were dating because we were both inexperienced and we rushed into things. That's not your fault, so don't think it was. I was the one who immediately said yes when you asked me out. I realized now that I did like you then and I still love you now, but at the time, I didn't know at all how to differentiate romantic feelings from platonic ones. I shouldn't have immediately said yes, I should've waited at least a day to confirm with myself that I did like you. If I hadn't rushed the both of us into something, we wouldn't have broken up. There wouldn't have been doubts or insecurities or anything wrong with us." Jeongin continued to rub your back soothingly. He was relieved that you had stopped shaking. "I'm sorry for hurting you. I'm sorry for making you feel like everything was your fault. And I'm sorry that you received a letter from me, because all it did was make things worse between us."

"Jeongin, I- I still love you too," You managed to get out.

It was in that moment that Jeongin realized he had said that he loves you. He gritted his teeth and scratched the back of his neck awkwardly.

"But I need more time," You told him.

"I understand that." He nodded his head and gave you a small smile. "But can I walk you home?"

You nodded, and took the hand he offered to help you up off the ground. It felt like the first time again.

Jeongin barged into his younger brother's room. "Were you looking through my stuff?"

"Yes," His brother responded, scribbling into his notebook and ignoring the urge to give his older brother eye contact. "I was helping mom clean in your room."

"Why did ____ receive a letter I wrote ages ago before we broke up?" Jeongin crossed his arms, demanding an answer.

Jeongin's little brother blinked twice before turning to him shocked. "You wrote that before you guys broke up? It looked recent so mom sent me to the mailbox to drop it off."

"Well thank you for mailing it," Jeongin tried to end the conversation, but his brother pressed on.

"Oh I know why it looked recent," His brother have him a sly smile. "You kept it in good condition since that was the only thing of ____ you had left before they dumped you." Jeongin's little brother chuckled, going back to his notes. Then a thought popped into his mind. "Wait. Why are you thanking me?"

"No reason. Just, thank you," Jeongin told him sincerely. "Now stop touching other people's mail."

"Hey, what?" The younger was confused. "I don't understand you-" But Jeongin was already out of the room and heading back to his.

Jeongin sat at his desk in front of his bedroom window, and looked at his half of the ripped love note. He smiled to himself. He had written the letter ages ago and wanted to mail it to you as a cute gesture, but you had broken up with him the day after he had written it, and demanded all of your stuff back.

Jeongin held up his half, analyzing the piece of paper. He had the ending of the letter.

The boy caught sight of you at your bedroom window, staring from across the complex. You held up your half and smiled at him.

You had the start of the letter.

( THE LETTER )

I know this is sudden, ____.

But I wanted to send this to you because you mean a lot to me, more than I initially thought. I just want to talk to you all the time, and thinking about you puts the biggest smile on my face. I want to send you letters like this every week. No, everyday. And I want to fill your mailbox up with love notes and other things I hope you'll find adorable and wholesome so that when you go outside to open it, it explodes in an endless supply of my affection and my words kind of just fall around you. And you can think, "Wow, Jeongin really likes me. He likes me." Because I do like you.

Okay. That was pretty cheesy of me. It's only the truth, though. I have real romantic feelings for you, and I've been thinking about how much I like you for awhile now.

I remember when you stomped up the steps to the platform of the L train just a few months ago. You looked pissed and about ready to kill me. I won't lie to you, I was fearing for my life and I thought, "This is it. This is how I go. At the hands of a beautiful human." But you didn't kill me. You grabbed me by my shirt collar and you gave me a quick kiss and said, "I like your stupid ass." Not the most romantic confession, but it's the only confession I've ever gotten. It's the only confession I want and need.

And I remember you tripping and falling right after. I wanted to carry your bookbag for you, but you wouldn't let me. We kept asking each other why. "Why can't I carry it?" I asked, "Why do you want to carry it?" You asked. "Because I want to," I would say and then you would yell at me and tell me to give your bookbag back. We looked like ten-year-olds.

The train had pulled in and you tried to grab my hand and lead me inside, but you tripped over my foot and fell down instead. You fell so hard you started crying and I panicked inside. But when I rubbed your back and asked if you were okay, you said you were upset that you made me miss the train. I offered you my hand and you took, and now, I want to hold your hand forever.

So yeah, I like you a lot. I'm sorry it took so long for me to say it. I can't wait to see where we go from here.

With love, Jeongin.

all rights reserved | copyrights © spookybias. do not repost, translate, moderate, or copy any of my works.

[crescentsteel]

Just Friends - Part 10

plot: fubu set up with Kuroo, model fem reader genre: fluff, smut, slow burn, angst  word count:  7k

A/N [More at the end]: 

I reviewed and edited Chapters 1 and 2 a bit because I kinda cringed at the errors and my writing was wonky (more than it already is now). No plot changes don't worry.

Thank you for all those who read this, especially to those who took their time to comment and feedback. It meant the world to me who stayed up later than usual and poured my heart out on this.

Part 9 || Epilogue || m.list

You instantly snapped your head up with expanded eyes. Despite the sternness his voice contained, you saw the delicate swirl of complex  emotions in his eyes, one that you haven’t seen him display before. You saw how the contrast of heartache and relief graced his features. 

“I love you, y.n.”

The quietness gave way for you to hear every single word he said. It was gently uttered, but firm on what it meant. 

It was almost magical, if not for the perplexity which came with that statement that enshrouded everything else.

As if the universe agreed with you, another set of lights landed on both of you, popping the enchanted bubble you two were in.

“Let’s go. We need to talk” He moved his hand from your waist to the back of your shoulder and guided you to his car. Still unable to regain your calm from what just happened, you absent-mindedly followed him and went inside the passenger’s seat.

“My place or yours?”

His question made you buck yourself up to the present again. It was the question that started your indecent affairs with Kuroo, and now he’s using it to settle what branched from said affairs.

“Did you really just ask me that?” You were unable to refrain yourself from retorting.

“What?” He asked back even though his eyes had a tender playfulness to them. He clearly knew what you meant but wanted you to elaborate for his entertainment.

You just rolled your eyes and ignored it. “Yours.” You weren’t playing his game. You just rather resolve the issue at hand somewhere not in your place. The last time’s conflict left you feeling vacant when he walked out the door and you stayed there with gloom lingering on every space of your place. You couldn’t do anything because it was your home. You just let it evaporate on its own.

In case things go South like they always do, you wouldn’t want to worsen the state of your already sullied abode. 

So you let him start the vehicle and drive off.

“I really thought you were gone again,” he broke the fragile silence.

“What do you mean?”

“I went to your place and they told me you left. I assumed you flew somewhere insanely far away for the second time.” All the involute sentiments he was carrying a while ago dissipated. He’s back to his laid-back self.

“Why would you think that?”

He sneered as his eyes flashed with bitterness even as he stared at the road. “Cause that’s what you do, kitten. You run away when things get too inconvenient for you.”

What could you say to that? 

Nothing. He was absolutely right. 

You tried to prove to yourself that you weren’t a spoiled rich brat by working your butt off, but it was never too difficult for you. You worked hard, but everything went smoothly like how you wanted them to. 

But with Kuroo, everything was in shambles. And in every chance you had to make things right with him, you chicken out. You blamed external factors such as timing not being right or other people were in the way. But you always had your chance. You just despised the fact that you had to cross certain barriers to move forward with your relationship with him. You wanted things easy. 

Before you left, you really believed that you wanted to confess to him just to get some clarity on your relationship. So why did you stop talking to him at all? If that was your only goal, you could’ve talked to him the morning after. But you didn’t. Because you didn’t like the pain of facing him again when he was messing around with women other than you. So instead of facing it head on, you ran away. 

It was the same when you confessed dead drunk and forgot the next morning. You were scared that he didn’t feel the same way, so you took the safe way out. 

And when it was becoming too much again, you were tempted to do the same exact thing you did ago: remove all the complications in your life by getting away from the source of it - Kuroo. 

With your mind flooded with realizations, you didn’t notice that you arrived at his place already. 

At least that was what you thought because he stopped the engine, but the neighborhood wasn’t familiar to you.

“Where are we?” you asked. 

“My place. Duh.” He answered before getting out. It was sarcastic, but it cheered you up. He was back to how he used to treat you before the drunken fiasco. It was just three weeks but it felt like you haven’t heard his taunts far longer than that. That’s how much you missed him.

You followed him and stepped out of his car as well. He must’ve moved out just recently, probably when you weren’t talking much, or else you would’ve known. 

“Glad to know you moved out of that dump.” Even with the current situation, you couldn’t just stay quiet when your mind instinctively thought of something to get back to his snarky remark. 

“Dump, huh?” He was looking at a certain building that you surmised was where his new apartment was. He scoffed before looking at you.

“Wonder why you agreed to let me fuck you in that dump though.” His grin spread wide enough that his teeth showed, clearly pleased with how he handled your usual battle of sarcasm.

You veered from his playful gaze and pursed your lips from the lack of a good response to bring down that haughty smile of his.

You regret ragging him on. You should’ve just stayed quiet. 

“Can we go inside now? It’s cold” You changed the topic being the loser that you were. 

“Come on then.” His satisfied smirk was still on his face knowing that he won that quick exchange. He waited for you to go to his side, then started walking towards the building.  

When you came back to the country, you thought it was odd that still stayed in his previous place. You were positive that he could afford to get a nicer one. Now it made sense. He was saving up for this. 

While heading to his unit, you could tell from the interior and the exterior of the building that the price of the place was above average. 

Inside the elevator, there was only you and him. He was about to press his floor number, but his hand stopped mid air before putting it down again.

“Wanna guess what floor I’m in?”

“And if I get it wrong?” He didn’t have to say it out loud for you to know where he was going with it. It was one of your gambling games. 

“You owe me nothing but the truth tonight.” Your bets were fun and the stakes were always petty but the weight of his stare let you know that the intent behind it was nothing compared to your previous wagers. 

He would demand nothing else but the truth from you when you two start to talk about the issue at hand. 

You found it strange. Of course, you would be honest. That’s the point of the conversation you’d be having when you reach his unit. 

But since he was acting like candor was of great worth to get from you, you’d ask for something of similar value. 

“If I get it right, I’m getting your Nekoma jersey. The one with No.1 on it.”

He was obviously taken aback from what you asked for. “Why that?”

“Why not?” You immediately asked back. 

He looked at the numbers on the side of the elevators while he scratched the roof of his teeth with tongue. 

“I changed my mind. I want all of them.”

“Huh?!”

“The odds aren’t right. There are 40 floors and the chance of getting it right is only 1/40. If you’d think about it, I’m even being generous.”

He clicked his tongue, acknowledging that your point was valid. “Deal.”

You instantly responded without even thinking twice, “22.”

You wished you could’ve captured his reaction. 

“You were already eyeing 22, dumbass. Your hand literally stopped in front of that number.” You shook your head as you snickered from that tiny victory, letting it take some of your tension away. “Say goodbye to your jerseys tonight,” you added. 

He usually won’t make such a mistake during your gambles. And because he did, you worked out that he must be distressed too. 

“Fuck.” He cursed then pressed the button you just said.

“Ugh fine, you can keep one.” You felt bad cause you even though the probability of you winning was low, the stakes for you were basically a given. 

The way on his unit was spent arguing on why the deal should be void because it wasn’t really a gamble since you already knew the answer. 

On his doorstep, you both hastenly arrived at a compromise of getting only his captain’s jersey, knowing that the inescapable confrontation is about to take place.

When he opened the door, it was nicer than you expected. It was modern looking with its minimalist interior and gray, black, and white tones. Your place was bigger but this looked more spacious because there weren’t unnecessary furnitures. 

The click of the door brought you back to why you were here. All the monkeying around a while ago was just a prelude to this and any impact it had on you was diminishing by the second. Things were about to get serious. You could feel anxiety crawling back to your skin. 

You didn’t wait for his hospitality and sat yourself on the couch. 

He immediately went after and sat beside you. 

You shook your head. “No.”

“What?” A frown creasing his forehead from the ‘no’ that came out of nowhere. 

“Don’t sit near me. It makes me uncomfortable.” It might have been rude, but you just had to say it. You want your mind working functionally so you can’t have him anywhere near your personal space. 

Instead of getting offended, he eyed you with consideration before standing up. He got a chair from his dining area and sat a good few steps away from you. He crossed his legs and arms. 

“So?” He proceeded, imploring you to be the first one to open the conversation that was suspended by the vehicle earlier. 

“What do you mean ‘so’?” You laughed sourly. “You’re the one supposed to explain things. Do you expect me to just accept what you said a while ago?”

He threw you a questioning look. “Is it really that hard to believe?” “You avoided me for weeks. When I tried to make up with you, you brushed me off cause you were seeing someone else. So my apologies for being so skeptical,” your last sentence full of uninhibited scorn.

“Who said I was seeing her? She’s just a volleyball player I’m working with.” If this was a normal conversation, he’d definitely have some snide comments to go along with it. But he didn’t swerve to his usual smugness. He remained pensive.

You couldn’t think of a decent reply except for an timid “Oh” that came from your mouth. You’re reassured that it wasn’t like that, but it was overpowered by the shame brought by your incorrect assumption.  

He didn’t wait for you to recover as he asked right away, “Why did you ignore me after that?” 

But despite the embarrassment, your brain was still running its engine properly. So you skillfully evade his query. “You still haven’t told me why you avoided me prior to that.”

He puffed a heavy breath. “I didn’t know how to get back to that friendship bullshit that you wanted so bad.” He uncrossed his legs and slouched with his elbows on his thighs. “Now answer my question,” he commanded.

“Well.. I didn’t want to intervene with whatever or whoever it is you’re busy with,” you said a bit too quickly without explaining further. “My turn again,” you continued on/

“No. I addressed two things from you so it’s still my turn,” he firmly asserted.

You were about to retaliate but he beat you to it with his own question. “How many times have I made you cry?”

It was an abrupt one that wasn’t in line with the previous questions that preceded it. You flinched from how it hit that certain memory you thought you moved on from.

“Never. What gave you that idea?” You denied as fast as you could. He didn’t have to know that insignificant detail. ‘It doesn’t  matter’ you told yourself even though you knew it was your pride that wouldn’t let you answer truthfully.

You’re glad to have won the bet earlier. Even though you thought you were going to be completely honest, there were just some details that need not be known.

Heated stares replaced words as both of you waited until the other withdrew. He was glaring at you, looking for an ounce of deceit. Too bad for him though because you have no intentions of folding. 

You arose the winner when he’s the first to concede as he straightened his posture from slouching. He leaned back on the backrest of his chair and sighed exasperatedly. 

“Man, I’d like to complain, but I guess your tenacity is one of the reasons why I fell for you.”

You were doing so well but with what he just said, your heart is back to the mess it was when he pulled you to him and said he loves you for the first time.

“Cat got your tongue, kitten?” His smug grin back to its former glory, making you even more flustered than you already were.

“How can you say things like that so indifferently?” You voiced out, irritated at how he’s so relaxed while youre all wound up.

“Look. I’ve been keeping my mouth shut ever since you came back. Now that it’s out in the open, I’ll say it as much as I want to.”

Did you hear him correctly? He said ‘since you came back.’ When exactly did he start having feelings for you? 

“What do-”

“Hold it right there. You don’t get to ask anything yet since your last answer was a lie.”

You groaned. He shouldn’t be allowed to call you tenacious when he’s even worse than you are when he wants to be. “It is not. So let’s move on,” you tried to proceed but he cut you off right away.

“Kenma told me.”

Your solid defiance rapidly chipped from your secret being found out by the person you wanted to hide it from. You could only guess that Kenma told him just now. That’s why he was on a rampant chase to find you. 

The earlier gamble made sense now. He anticipated your refusal to admit what happened back then, back before you left. So he wanted to ensure that you would be forthright about it. 

Even after losing the bet, his goal was still secured for he had Kenma’s story as proof.

You tried to feel any hostility towards Kenma but you didn’t have it in your heart to do so. You trusted Kenma. He must have had a good reason for telling Kuroo now when he’d kept it well for more than a year.

“Fine,” you said under your breath. 

“Too many that I didn’t bother counting.”

Guilt darkened the diffidence on his face. He must not have expected that you would be the type to cry over a guy, especially him who started his relationship with you only as a bed warmer.  

But you went on with your previous question since that’s what was pervading in your mind. “When did you realize?” You were really curious since when the feeling has been mutual between the two of you. 

“Realize what?”

“That you l-,” you hesitated, reluctant to fully spat out the phrase completely even though he already said it first hand. Looking back, you don't know how you convinced yourself to admit your feelings to him when you’re stuttering from a trifling thing such as this. 

“That I love you?”

You staved off away from his perfervid stare, not able to handle it as you replied a brash “Yeah” to maintain your tough façade.

“At the very same night you were supposed to confess.”

You harshly returned your gaze to him. “Was that a joke?” You chuckled wryly. “In case you forgot, I was there.” 

You were grateful to Kenma being there at that moment, but it’s different when it’s finally Kuroo you’re confronting. You could feel all the unaddressed bitterness you buried deep inside take over you.

“I was hoping to get an honest conversation. Instead, I arrived at the godforsaken bar,” you continued with a forced smile, “and stood watch as you made that first move to kiss her, how you pulled her close like ….  like you couldn’t get enough.” The particular scene tore you back then and it does just the same now. Before you knew it, warm liquid pooled in the corner of your eyes without any warning. 

You turned your head sideway and let your hair cover your face. 

You didn’t want him to see how your lips quivered as you fend off a whimper that was already at the back of your tongue

You sealed shut any feelings you had for that certain chapter of your relationship with Kuroo. So you couldn’t understand the surge of sullenness that flowed through you. It must be from how paradoxical his narrative seemed. 

How could he claim to love you when he enjoyed the sultry company of another?

If Kuroo would think of two words to describe your personality, it would be determined and composed, to the point that you can seem cold and apathetic at times. You were the kind of person who didn’t give two shits to anything you found unnecessary or irrelevant. 

Since he met you, you constantly had your guard up as if people will find something awful if they get a tiny peek of what you really are. He couldn’t do something about that. He didn’t have any right to. You two were only fucking around. He later figured out that you didn’t want people to know who you really were - an heiress and a successful model. 

That’s why you traded carefully around people. 

But when you came back and asked only for friendship, you still had your fences up like you were hiding something. He thought maybe because you’ve had them up for so long that you didn’t know how to turn it off, even for him whom you considered a friend. 

So to see you struggling to keep your walls up that were slowly crumbling, he realized why you have a soft spot for Kenma. He’s already seen what you tried so hard to protect.

Disobeying your earlier instruction to not sit beside you, he stood up from the chair and moved to your side. 

When you saw him do so, you didn’t say anything. You only raised your hand to nimbly wipe your tears that were already falling. He grabbed your hand you were using and held it still on your lap. He replaced it with his own, drying your tears with his fingers. 

It was the least he could do with being the cause of it, and he was glad you let him even though you still kept your eyes away from him.

He trailed his fingers down your jaw and slightly lifted your face so he could look at you. What he saw was unrefined vulnerability, and even then, you wore it beautifully. 

He finally understood. That wall you built when you met again was exclusively for him. You guarded your heart from him. You created the friends only set up so you wouldn’t get hurt again.

It made him feel like shit. You really did love him back then, enough to cause you this pain.

“I’m sorry. I was half-assed about it at the time. Nothing more happened with me and whoever that girl was. I just,” he trailed off knowing that the next thing he’s going to say is gonna sound stupid. “used her to see if what I felt for you was real.”

You raised your gaze to him with eyes wide with disbelief. “Are you serious?”

“I know it’s idiotic, okay?” His voice took a slightly defensive tone as you were about to judge his line of thinking back then. “But we were only fuck buddies. I didn’t want to start a relationship with you then realize that I was just confusing the comfort of your company with something as serious as love.”

He stroked your knuckles after he explained.

“I really am sorry, y/n. I didn’t mean to hurt you like that.” His words dripping with remorse from every single tear that you shed for him without him knowing. 

“Why tell me only now? It’s been months since I came back.”

“You were insanely driven on being friends only. I didn’t think you feel the same way.”

No one said anything after. He couldn’t tell if you’re aware of it too, but he could feel tension in his every vein as his next question dangled on the tip of his tongue. 

“Do you?”

You bit your lip as you averted your eyes downwards again. 

“You know the answer to that already.”

Indeed he does. You wouldn’t be this affected if you didn’t. But he has to hear it directly from you. He has to hear you say you love him for real this time. 

“I need it to come from you.” He gently held your cheek to guide you back to his gaze. He needs to see the entirety of your face, especially your eyes, when you finally tell him how you truly feel about him. 

“I… I-” He could see your strenuous struggle to get the phrase out. You eminently tried as you kept uttering the first syllable but nothing after that. “I can’t say it,” you said defeatedly. 

He should be frustrated. He laid out all his cards open for you to see, but you refused to do the same when you had one last face down card that would declare the game over where you both win. 

But he held nothing but patience. He could wait for the phrase he’d been longing for as long as he made sure of something.

“You don’t have to if you can’t say it. But I’ll be honest. I,” he let out a deep breath before continuing, “I can’t stand us being friends only anymore.”

He removed his light grasp on your face as his hand travelled to the one that he hasn’t been holding. He lightly squeezed your fingers to get you to heed the attention he needed from you. 

“Be my girlfriend, y/n. Be mine.”

If you say no at this point, he’d lose his mind.

With his focus solely on you as he waited for an answer, he saw a subtle nod from you.

“Okay.”

It might seem too simple and bland of an answer. But you two had been going on through ragged stops for a year that he couldn’t care about trivial crap like that. 

It wasn’t sweet and he found that perfectly okay. Because it was you. He just needed you to finally let him be more than just fuck buddy, more than a friend.

And when your lips tugged on both corners to form a smile that was directed at him, especially for him, it made his heart soar.

“Is this really happening?”

You had the gall to be skeptical when his actions never hid his affection for you. He just didn’t say it out loud.

“You bet your ass it is.” Instead of his usual shit-eating smile that would’ve accompanied his response, his smile mirrored yours.

You were both happy.

Unable to contain himself, he acted on what always wanted.to without anything holding him back. 

He kissed you. 

No alcohol and no bullshit involved, just taking in that first touch of your lips as officially your lover.

His hands travel up to your shoulders as he scoots over to have you closer. You taste and feel ethereal. It was unlike any kiss you’ve shared in the past. The ache he had for you this whole time was being lulled by how your soft lips cascaded on his. 

His one hand goes up to the base of your neck while he parts your lips so he can have better access on the wonders of your mouth. 

You sighed helplessly to the kiss before withdrawing just a bit, your warm breaths still mingling with one another. 

“Wait,” you gasped inches away from his lips before burrowing your face on the crook of his neck. 

“What’s wrong?” He asked worriedly, stroking your neck and shoulder to soothe whatever it is that’s bothering you.. 

“It feels weird.”

“Weird how?”

You lifted your head and looked at him with the most insane blush he’s seen from you. Your cheeks were a rosy fury that highlighted a foreign countenance in your face. Your orbs were glossy and sparkling with a tiny hint of naivety that he’s never seen from you. Your mouth was compressed in a thin line that he could tell was done to prevent the trembling of your lips that was still slightly evident.

He managed to get another unknown aspect of you to surface, and goddamn what a pleasant surprise it was. 

He loves your confidence. It was sexy. But bashfulness was an exceptional look on you too. It provided depth to your character which was already fascinating to him to begin with. 

He couldn’t wait until he could fully discover everything about you, even the one you still weren’t aware of. 

“It’s like I’m overwhelmed by something until I can’t breathe. But I… I like it?” You glowered right after describing it, probably thinking that it sounded asinine. 

He was amused and charmed at the same time from how you tried to put into words how he was making you feel. 

“You do realize we’ve fucked countless times already.” He couldn’t resist goading further even when he knew exactly what you were talking about. 

“You don’t say,” you riposted, gaining your smart-assery back to which he laughs at. 

“God, I really love you.”

He lunges to claim your lips once more, his need to have more of you back with heightened intensity.

You were getting dizzy from how he was kissing you. It was much more needy than the previous one. You still haven’t fully grasped what just happened and yet he’s already filling your senses, making you forget the tiny insignificant details and retaining only one fact that mattered. 

You and him. 

His hand on your shoulder wanders down to your waist while you grasp his biceps for support as he pulls you even closer until you were straddling him. 

His mouth did not linger too long on yours as it impatiently trailed down your neck, interchanging loving kisses with hungry sucks that stirred your thirst for him.

You remembered some parts of the drunken sex you had, but they were just flashes and blurred images. The sensation from the experience wasn’t retained. 

It seemed like a far away memory compared to how he was making you feel at the present moment.

You suddenly feel him slip his hand underneath your shirt, palming your bare skin upwards until it reaches one soft mound which he doesn't hesitate to squeeze.

“Haaaa. Kurooo, wait,” you plead breathlessly. You were getting overwhelmed by how he swiftly fanned the flames of desire that was spreading throughout your body.

His lips left the sensitive skin of your collar and met your gaze with restrained hunger.

“What is it?” 

You didn’t know what to say. Did you want him to slow down or just have his way with you already?

He must have noticed your conflict so he decided for you. 

He chose the latter.

Both his hands scurried to your hips, guiding you to raise them slightly while his lips find their way to yours again. Not bothering to remove or even tug down your leggings, he slid one hand inside which was welcomed by your slick arousal. 

“Why’d you stop me when you’re already this wet?” He asked with pride flickering in his eyes knowing that it was him who caused it. 

But he did not let you answer as he shoved one finger in your core.

“Aahh,” your eyes closed shut and your thighs tremble from the sudden pleasure as your hands move to clutch his shoulders to anchor yourself. You rest your forehead on his while puffing heavily. 

“Kuroo...” you whimpered.

He steadies you with one hand, but does not relent as he inserts one more digit.

“Hmmm?” You could tell that he was enjoying your wanton surrender just from the way he sounded. 

“It feels too much,” you admitted. 

“Too much? Oh kitten, we’ve barely even started.”

He took the hem of your shirt and lifted it up. “Bite it,” he commanded and you complied obediently. 

He hoists your bra down your chest, exposing your unclad breasts to him. He eagerly takes one perk nipple in his mouth while his one hand goes around your waist. He retacts his fingers inside and rubs the bundle of nerves above your slit in hurried circles that were driving you to the brink of madness. 

He was right. This was still foreplay, but you were already so feverish. 

Your moans were muffled by how hard you were biting the cotton fabric of your shirt. 

“Take your shirt off. I want to hear you,” his voice raspy as he stopped everything he was doing that was making you feel good. You quickly yanked your shirt off so he could go back to doing them right away.

 As soon as your top was thrown away, he inserted the same fingers back again and started pumping in and out aggressively. 

With his request and the absence of your shirt, nothing was repressing the salacious sounds that were coming out of your mouth

The heat in the pit of your groin was building up too fast. It was a very steep peak that he was rapidly coercing you to reach. 

“Feels-ahh-so good.”

He groaned in response. He took out his digits and loosened his hold of you which made you flutter your eyes open. 

“Let’s take this to my bed,” he said ruggedly as he was about to get up. 

You firmly grasp his shoulders to stop him. “Wait.”

A dash of timidness came over you again which you couldn’t understand. Just like he said earlier, you’ve had a lot of sex. You did things more scandalous than what you had in mind, but you feel flustered just thinking about saying it out loud. 

“What is it?”

“Uhh,” you swallowed your nerves. “Do you mind getting your couch dirty?” 

He raised an eyebrow from your question, but was immediately followed by a riveting smile upon realizing what you meant. 

“Not all,” he took off his shirt then proceeded to unclasp your bra that was still lugged your breasts. 

“We can get it dirty as much as we want,” he whispered right in your ear. 

--

Sex with Kuroo before usually ended with both of you scramming to get water or go to the bathroom to clean up. Then when you went back to his bed, both of you just settled down in  whatever position you were comfortable in. 

Holding each other after sex just was never on the table. No one talked about it and no one initiated so you figured both of you weren’t into it. You weren’t sure about him but you found the act too intimate to do between casual sexmates.

You had no idea it felt this good to be cradled by him.

Your head was nested on his arm that he extended for you. His other one was enveloped around your waist and your face and hands were burrowed on his chest. 

“This is nice,” was an understatement that you breathed on his skin.

“Mmhmm. More especially since you’re awake and sober,” he hummed on your hair.

“Hmm?”

He chuckles lightly as he caresses your hair delicately, his fingers sometimes grazing your nape. 

“Yeah, I held you like this the night of my birthday instead of going back.”

You definitely had no memories of that. You knew he took care of you, but you didn’t think he got cozy in bed afterwards. 

“I thought awww poor you. You seemed like you could use a cuddle. You did beg me to fuck you after all.”

Typical of him, he had to be an ass and ruin the moment. 

But you didn’t believe him. You knew that’s not what happened. You did kiss him first and asked him to stay, but you did not beg. Even if you did forget everything, you still wouldn’t believe him. You’re not the type of person to beg.

“Don’t invent stories just because you wanted to feel me up after sex.” 

His chest rumbles within your touch as he worked up a laugh from your snappy comeback. “You’re really something, kitten.”

“You’re gonna keep calling me that, huh?”

He cranes his head back a bit, creating some space between you. You could tell he was peering at you.

“Don’t like it?”

You smile at his question. You found the nickname tacky at first, but it kind of got stuck with you. He’s never called you any other pet names other than that and it made you feel like it was solely for you.

“No, I love it.”

You tilt your head up a bit to look at him.

“I love you.”

You were so apprehensive earlier because of the torment that still lingered from the many failed attempts to tell him so. 

You thought you would need more time, but that doesn’t seem to be the case as he easily whisked your worries away just by being with him like this. 

You were finally able to tell him sincerely in your own accord. You didn’t realize keeping these feelings all to yourself was so heavy that letting it out was such a liberating experience.

As you free your chest with the restless burden of secretly loving him, you don’t feel empty because your heart was filled with content from knowing that he loves you just the same.

It reflects on his face, more so now that his smile is growing broader by the second which was accompanied by a noticeable flush on his cheeks that was illuminated by the dim light of his night lamp.”

“I love you too, y/n.” His eyes exuding profound adoration for you.

“I had my chance to tell you the morning after I got wasted. I just-”

“Hey,” he cut you off then removed his hand on your waist to cup your neck, his thumb brushing gently the curve of your jaw. 

“I have you now. That’s all I care about,” the elated smile still not leaving his face. 

“I can see that. You look too freaking happy,” you said as revenge for how he ruined your moment just a while ago. 

“Well, sorry I’m not emotionally constipated like you,” he quickly outwitted your attempt to mock him. 

“You scumbag,” you hissed despite his blissful smile infecting you. 

He pulls you again closer to him until your bodies stripped off of any clothing are perfectly molded against each other. 

“Yea yea, say whatever you want but I’m the scumbag you love.” Even when you couldn’t see his face anymore, you could still hear how enraptured he was. 

And so were you as you snuggled with him until you fell asleep. 

--

“Sorry, I’ll be a little late, kitten. I need to be here for a while even though the game ended already.”

You could hear him scuffling around with the dwindling sound of excitement in the background. 

You’re already late from your planned time, but he was running even later. Not that you were upset. You didn’t have major plans or anything. You just agreed to go to his place together since you’re spending the night there. 

“You have my keys, right? You can go ahead.”

“I can go there and wait for you,” you suggested since you still have some energy left from the orderly photoshoot you had this late afternoon. Also, you’d just be restless waiting for him at his apartment. 

“You sure?” He asked even though you were sure he’s smiling judging from the way he sounded. 

“Yup.”

“Okay then! Have to hang up now though. Love you, kitten,” then he ended the call. 

It’s been almost a month now since you two were officially together but he sometimes still catches you off guard with how he expresses his love for you without reservations. But you have no complaints. 

Upon arriving in Tokyo Stadium, there were only a few people inside, and some of those few are heading out. 

Thank goodness for that. Even if you weren’t feeling tired, you didn’t wanna get squashed by Volleyball enthusiasts. It would also make your bed-headed boyfriend much easier to find. 

You don’t want to call him just yet. He’s probably still occupied so you’ll just look for him. 

As you paced the area unsurely, you were starting to doubt your decision to look for him on your own. You had no idea stadiums had this kind of structure on the inside since you’ve never gone in one. You thought it was just one big open area with elevated benches.

Instead of going inside the actual playing arena, you went to the narrow halls that branched to the sides of the building.

Just before passing a certain corner, someone emerged from a room that you weren’t aware was actually there.

“Oy Hinata, I’m going ahead if you keep being a slowtard,” a tall, dark-haired man aggressively stated before walking towards your direction.

“Kageyama, you impatient turd!” A bright orange-haired guy, who’s probably called Hinata, came out right after, hurrying to go after the dark haired one who’s most likely Kageyama.

Before he could even pass you by, you lock eyes with Hinata.

A snap of familiarity hits you both.

“Waah. Ms. Pretty!” He said in English, completely and overwhelmingly affable that it was almost adorable.

Oh right, you spoke in English the first time you met.

“Hello.” You smiled politely, still holding up your non-Japanese speaking facade.

Kageyama stopped walking and turned his attention to you. He bowed then looked at Hinata. “You know her?” He asked in Nihongo.

“Not really. But it was kinda funny, Kuroo-san called her ‘kitten’ but she didn’t really know him,” Hinata grinned from amusement only but Kageyama didn’t respond.

Hinata frowned and took a semi defensive stance. “You better not tell Kuroo-san I said that.”

You just alternate your gaze between the two men, deciding whether you should admit that you could actually speak Nihongo and that you’re looking for Kuroo or just let things play out as is. 

“What’s the noise all about?” 

Another set of recognizable faces turned up - fake blondie, curly, and black and white.

It wasn’t hard to guess why they were there. They were athletes. They weren’t just guests in the event. They were most likely brand ambassadors too, except for Kageyama. It’s the first time you saw the man. 

They must be part of the national team. Kuroo did say it was an international match today.

Fake blondie’s face lit up as soon as his eyes landed on your face. He quickly made his way to approach you, passing by Hinata when he did.

“You lost, pretty girl?” It contained everything Hinata’s previous compliment lacked, pure flirtatiousness together with a come-hither smile. 

So the Volleyball national team can somehow speak English. Although, they still retained their heavy accents.  

You studied fake blondie in front of you and quickly decided that you wouldn’t date him even if you haven’t met Kuroo. The guy’s hot, but he seems like an idiot.

“Y/n?”

Someone who you didn’t have to identify by his hair entered the scene, Yaku. 

You wave reservedly at him for you still haven’t forgotten how you acted around him the first you met.

“What’re you doing here?” He, then, turned to fake blondie. “Cut it out, Miya-san. I’m certain she’s not interested.”

“She can’t understand Nihongo, Yaku-san.” Black and white appeared to be whispering but his voice was loud enough for everyone to hear.. 

Yaku threw him a confused look. “What? I met her around two months ago. She’s a local, Bokuto.”

The Miya person scowled, “Geez. Could’ve saved me the trouble.”

You just ignored him and shifted your attention to Yaku. 

“I’m looking for Tet-” you cleared your throat. He’s been pestering you to call him ‘Tetsu’ every single day until you just succumbed to it and it became normal to you. You almost addressed him as such to these people who you presume he’s working with. 

“I’m looking for Kuroo.”

Yaku raised an eyebrow with intrigue twinkling on his whole face. “Oh?” 

“Mmmhmm,” you answered obscurely. 

“You friends or somethin?” Miya asked with an ounce of wariness, changing your initial thought of him being an idiot.

Yaku grinned. “They’re just friends,” he answered for you, obviously anticipating whether you’d agree or not. 

You weren’t ashamed of dating Kuroo, but you’ve had some kind of weird interaction with these people that involved Kuroo, save for Kageyama obviously. Poor guy must be confused at the novelty of what’s happening.

From behind Bokuto and the curly haired guy whose name you still have no idea what, the man you were looking for presented himself and walked towards you. 

Those he passed by had their eyes lingering on his back with Miya being the last person to notice him since Miya is the closest to you. 

“Not that it’s any of your business,” he puts a possessive arm around you, “ but this lost lady here is my girlfriend.” 

You tried to hold off a smile, but it was futile. You didn’t expect that announcing it to other people was that gratifying after more than a year of consistently telling people otherwise. . 

Damn it feels good to be more than just friends with Kuroo. 

A/N”

I want to cry. This was my very first fic and my very first series as well. I'm so happy to see it through and finish it.

I'm thinking of an epilogue maybe next year, but for now, I'm marking it as completed.

I love you all.

Part 9 || Epilogue ||  m.list

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