#its so much fun where has this spark been last season omg

[footballandfiasco]

sorry guys eintracht frankfurt is so hot

[kpopmusiclyricsalbums]

WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT....

Kenzie 

The hidden goddess of songs in SM Entertainment. 

The brilliant lyricist that is behind some of the most iconic songs in SM’s history. 

A graduate from the Berklee College of music, yes, that Berklee she has written 10 songs to hit number 1 on the gaon chart, and her B-sides are dreams.  

The thing that I love about Kenzie is that she knows how to twist a song into making it mean something while saying something else.  It’s kind of hidden meanings within a song that I don’t see all that much from writers.  It’s one of the reason I love Taylor Swift’s music is because I love learning something new every time I hear the same song over and over again.  The hidden depths and meaning more.  

3 Examples:

Obsession - EXO 

At first glance, the song could meaning the obsession with one’s fans/Idols, or being obsessed over someone and seeing the toxicity in it.  When I heard it, I thought it was a dig at sasaengs and fans that go to far.  Then the line at the end came in and it completely startled me.  

거울 속의 나를 보고 있는 나 / It’s me looking at myself in the mirror

It’s can simply change the entire meaning behind the song without even thinking about it.  It’s a double meaning that also is about ego, and self reflection.  Sometimes you get so caught up in everything, In yourself, you never realize the toxic part could also be from one’s own self-reflection.  The lines that follow are all of plea’s to get away, to disappear.  It’s the last line of substance in the song that flips it on it’s head.  A cry for help because sometimes your worst enemy, the thing that goes bump in your nightmares isn’t someone else, but you.  It turns the song into a dialogue with one person fighting with their own demons.  

Power Up - Red Velvet 

Power up is one of those Red song’s that people either hate or love.  (I personally loved it)  It’s one of those songs that is great for summer and is about having fun.  But it also is about recharging yourself and going for your dreams that seem so out there.  It’s also points out that maybe the reason we haven’t gotten our dreams yet is because we just need to have fun.  

It starts off with someone who hasn’t moved since they got up, and ends with them being recharged and ready to take on the world.  It’s about changing your mindset on things.  Yeah school is boring and sucks, but you could also think of it is school is learning and you are evolving as a human being.  It’s about changing the mindset. 

선생님은 내게 말씀하셨죠 / Teacher told me 

놀 때도 일할 때도 즐겁게 해 / To have fun whether I’m playing or working

그래 난 유달리 반짝거렸죠 /Yes, I shined even more

뜨거움도 새로움도 It’s mine / This hotness, this newness, it’s mine

It’s  a song to help those who need it be pumped and to get out of bed.  To go forth into the world and achieve their goals.  

Go go airplane 태양 위로 날아라/ Go, go, airplane, fly above the sun

Diving to the sky 완전 소름 돋았어 / Diving to the sky, I’m getting goosebumps

Let’s power up!

까맣게 다 타버릴 거예요/ We're gonna burn up

Doesn’t it make you enjoy Power up just a little bit more?

Into the New World - Girls Generation

Into the New World is certified Kpop Gold.  It’s the golden standard and a must for every new girl group to learn, and to be compared to.  The song is upbeat and high energy with just as much air needed to belt out the lyrics.  It’s a timeless song that has been turned into a rallying cry for protesters and Women empowerment.  Into the New World is what Girls’ Generation ended up doing for the Kpop industry as a whole for female groups, by going the tough route always working hard, facing the darkness that comes.  

사랑해 널 이 느낌 이대로 / I love you, just like this

그려 왔던 헤매임의 끝 / The longed end of wandering

이 세상 속에서 반복되는/ I leave behind This world’s

슬픔 이젠 안녕 / Unending sadness

수많은 알 수 없는 길 속에 / In the many unknowable paths

희미한 빛을 난 쫓아가 / I follow a dim light

언제까지라도 함께하는 거야 / It’s something we’ll do together to the end

다시 만난 나의 세계 / Into my new world

특별한 기적을 기다리지 마 / Don’t wait for a special miracle

눈앞에선 우리의 거친 길은 / There’s a rough road in front of us

알 수 없는 미��와 벽 바꾸지 않아 / With unknowable future and obstacles, I won’t change

포기할 수 없어 / I can’t give up

The lyrics in the chorus are talking about struggle and paths not yet traveled.  To a better place where even though the light is dim, we have to work towards it together, because that’s how things change.  It’s a rallying cry for hope, for endurance in tough times, and to make sure that people keep fighting for what they believe in.  That they know, they are not alone.  

To sum it all up, Kenzie is the secret hidden goddess of Kpop song writing.  If Kenzie releases a song, I know its going to be good.  So here a list of songs she has written the lyrics for and the links so you can listen and enjoy! 

BoA

DOTCH 

Garden in the Air 

I Kiss 

Lollipop 

M.E.P. (My Electronic Piano) 

Milky Way

Moto 

My Name 

On December 27th 

People Say…

Spring Rain 

Time to Begin 

EXO 

24/7 

Baby

For Life

Forever  

Monster 

Obsession 

Sing for You 

Transformer 

The First Snow  

What U Do?

Wolf 

Ya Ya Ya 

EXO-K 

Overdose 

EXO - CBX 

Playdate 

Rhythm After Summer 

EXO - Baekhyun 

Betcha 

EXO - Chen 

Love Words

Shall We?

F(x) 

Cash Me Out 

Danger 

Jet 

Lachata (Intro) & La Cha Ta 

MILK 

Mr. Boogie

Papi 

Red Light 

Signal  

Vacance 

Gain

Kiss or Kill 

Girls’ Generation 

All Night 

Diamond 

Europa 

Express 999 

FAN 

Fire Alarm 

Girlfriend 

HaHaHa

Haptic Motion 

Into the New World

Light Up the Sky 

Merry-Go-round 

Oh!

Oscar 

Way to Go!

Girls’ Generation-TTS 

OMG (Oh My God) 

Girls’ Generation - Seohyun 

Don’t Say No 

Girls’ Generation - Taeyeon 

All Night Long (& NCT Lucas) 

Close 

Four seasons 

I Got Love 

Lonely Night

Love You Like Crazy 

Spark  

Sweet Love 

Isak N Jiyeon 

The Sign 

NCT 127 

Limitless 

NCT Dream 

We Go Up 

Red Velvet 

Attaboy 

First Time 

Lady’s Room 

Lucky GIrl

Mr. E

Peek-a-Boo 

Power Up 

Psycho 

Really Bad Boy (RBB) 

Red Flavor 

Sassy Me 

Some Love 

SHINee 

All Day All Night 

Evil 

Graze

Green Rain  

Jo Jo 

Life

LOVE 

Love Sick 

Queen of New York 

Our Page 

Real

Rescue 

Savior

SHIFT  

Stranger  

Trigger 

Why So Serious?

SHINee - Key 

One of Those Nights 

SHINee - Onew 

Blue 

SHINee - Taemin 

Sexuality 

Want 

SMTOWN

Hotmail 

Red Sun 

Snowflake 

Super Junior 

첫눈이 와

A Day 

Angela 

Bittersweet 

Devil 

Good Love 

Hate U, Love U 

Lo Siento (& Leslie Grace) 

Storm 

The Girl is Mine 

Your Eyes 

Super Junior - Happy 

Sunny 

Super Junior - K.R.Y. 

Just You 

Super Junior - M 

Me 

Only U 

Super Junior - Kyuhyun 

At Gwanghwamun 

A Million Pieces 

SuperM

I Can’t Stand the Rain 

Let’s Go Everywhere 

The Grace 

한번 더, Ok?

One More Chance 

Sweet Emotion 

TVXQ 

하구달 

Humanoids

Like Now 

Oasis 

One 

Phantom 

Rainbow 

Remember

When We’ll Be Together  

Your Man 

TVXQ & Super Junior 

Show Me Your Love

Masterlist

[hideouspumpkin]

um hello??? that response almost made me tear up 🥺🥺 tbh this quarantine my relationship with food has been quite strained but taking the time to research new recipes and really enjoy the ritual of cooking and preparing the meal helps me appreciate it!!! i started watching terrace house and the meals were quite an important part in the first season and it kind of sparked an interest in japanese cuisine (1/2)

so my boyfriend got the cookbook of japan easy and we started trying out some meals. it really helped to connect to each other and build a better relationship with not only each other but also with food and my body. im also trying to see cooking for myself as an act of self love and see it as a way of taking care of my body and taking time out of my day for myself instead of seeing it as another task on my to do list (2/3 SORRY for the spamming!!)

honestly food plays such a big role in our lives and i really want to work on my relationship to it and see it as something positive that is enriching my day instead just a task where it's a constant struggle with my body + mine vs. food. also having your kitchen cabinets smell like indian spice markets is a delight :-) anyways! long rambling! sorry! i hope you're having a lovely evening and sending you loads of love! ❣️ (3/3)

ALSO (sorry last one for today i promise) making your own granola is fun and its so much better than store bought and it's just ??? making me feel like im living the life i always dreamed about having when i was 14. i'll just curl up in bed in the morning and have my homemade granola and see the rays of sunlight coming in through the window to make my mind a happier place and i just want to learn to appreciate the little moments like that ❣️

----

omg anon don’t apologise for that kind of spamming it was so heartwarming to read, so full of hope and love and softness !!! And i also agree, i do love cooking but as i live alone i tend to not put much thought and like love into it, but i want to change that because, as u said, cooking for yourself is an act of self love !!! feeding yourself is literally taking your life back into your own hands, nuturing yourself and all that but also throught the process of it !!! thinking abt what to eat, going to the store or the market, smelling, looking and touching the things, then and choosing what you need and what you want to then be cooking the meal, all of it is reclaiming your life in a way bcs spending the time to feed yourself, in an healthy way, on your own terms, and then, if you want to, you can share it, the whole of it, with the people you love like...all of this is quite...lovely to think abt im

Also the way you talked abt that granola......i do love the emotional links we all have with very specific food or meals ! I talked abt it with my friend today and we just listed the foods we were emotionally linked and why and it was such a fun an light and wonderful conversation tbh

And i do have a complicated relationship with food and eating and my body but also i see food and meals as having a major role in our lives because we need it and we also have the desire of it so it has so much more impact on us than say water  !!! and idk if i make any sense but its just all very interesting to me agfdgfa so anon im so so glad your sent me all of those it made my heart WARM like a good soup and i hope your relationship with food and urself through the lense of food keeps getting more complexe and more amazing as time goes (also don’t hesitate to send me other recipes you’ve tried and loved)

[space-lions-and-imagines]

If requests are open could you do some headcannons for the paladins for when their s/o asks them to spar but they are really graceful and looks like they are just dancing around them?

Eyyyy its been a long time but here I am making a weird gradual return! Season three has me hype and even though I have yet to watch it the spark is making its way back. So for the moment no spoilers please but once I watch it prepare for (hopefully) a more steady supply of writing~ So for the time being please enjoy this my dears

Shiro

-He loves training with them! He hates standing still and working out is an easy way to get off some access energy and wow his s/o is actually volunteering to spar with him is a dream come true 

-He doesn’t want to push them too hard though so he vows to take it easy, he isn’t trying to be condescending he just knows that going full force probably doesn’t make for a very good date

-He is watching s/o very closely, even more so than when he is fighting/sparring anyone else, so he quickly realizes just how graceful they actually are. He makes a comment about it not being very good form because he can easily knock them down 

-Eventually he actually forgets what it is he is actually doing because he gets so caught up in watching them and his own movements start to mirror their’s so it ends up being like that scene from Avatar when Katara and Aang are spar dancing 

-This also leads to s/o being able to find an easy opening and landing a direct hit to his chest knocking him back. This turns into that scene where Mulan first took down Shang and hes super impressed. 

-You know what it really is just like a scene from a movie complete with s/o leaning over and saying “Next time I promise to take it easy on you" 

Keith

-First things first is that asking Keith to spar is not the best idea. He backs down for no one. He is set to destroy at all times and he does not take losing well so s/o needs to be prepared for that 

-He is ready to go whenever though and its a good chance to see him in his natural element. He actually moves just as graceful and s/o has to not fall into the trap of watching his hips move and muscles flex because it really is quite a site 

-Keith is actually quite the trash talker when sparring too so there are lots of things to distract s/o when going against him. But they don’t realize just how mesmerized he is by them because he tries to hide it as hard as possible 

-What gives him away though is the color on his cheeks that has nothing to do with how hot its getting in the training bay no matter what he says. He also stammers ever so slightly ‘wh-what are you trying to uh do … do exactly? Hit me or um waltz, is it called waltzing? well you know what I mean either way!’

-He still ends up winning in the end, or whatever the equivalent of winning is in sparring, but afterwards s/o finds that he is still watching them really closely which they find kind of weird since usually he is avoiding looking at them directly because hes a shy boy 

-When asked what he is doing when caught he just tells them that "I just … think we should do that more often. It was fun," 

Pidge

- She has two moods which are: "I never want to step foot in the training bay” and “someone better FIGHT ME” so as long as s/o knows how to determine these moods there is no problem at all getting her to spar with them 

- Her fighting style is all about getting in close to her opponant so s/o is probably already a little bit flustered, its not often that they get to be this close 

- S/O quickly learns that its hard to actually land a hit since she is so quick and agile so they focus on blocking instead. This turns into this ducking and weaving sort of dance that Pidge picks up on 

- Seeing this Pidge starts to calculate the way that she moves to see s/o react, forcing them to move in even more dance like movements with her. She tries to keep a straight face when eventually s/o slips and shes forced to catch them but that only last for about .2 seconds before they are both cracking up 

- “Maybe next time I should ask you to dance so I could get an actual work out in,” she teases after wards when they are cooling down, this comment is met with s/o pouring ice cold water down her back 

- In the end it just makes them both a laughing grinning mess and helps relieve more stress than traditional sparring ever could 

Lance

- Honestly he didn’t even go into this thinking of sparring, he only took up the offer to spar because he loves spending alone time with s/o and this seemed like the perfect chance 

- He actually brought music to play during it, something upbeat and easy to dance to because he wasn’t so much looking to train as he was looking for a chance to gyrate his hips in s/o’s direction. 

- S/O tries to ignore him and his very obvious dancing but finds themselves falling into the trap. They start moving in time to the beat and throwing in unnecessary flourishes of their hips and rolling of their body 

- Lance wasn’t actually expecting his plan to work so he didn’t even pick up on it at first cause hes an absolute oblivious fool. It isn’t until s/o starts humming along to the music and stops trying to hit him does it occur to him that 'omg its happening!' 

- He then pulls out all the stops because this boy can dance and whats worse is he knows just how good he is. His body is a weapon and his sights are set on s/o and the only thing that is saving them is the fact that they are just as good as him. So its really a test of wills to see whos going to slip up first 

- It ends up being s/o who ends up literally tripping, even though its actually Lance’s fault because he wasn’t watching what he was doing because he was too busy making heart eyes at his s/o and ended up stepping on their feet. He uses this opportunity to dip them like he had it all planned 

- “You’re pretty good at sparring but your dancing could use some work. Good thing Im an amazing teacher on top of a list of other things,” he would tease before going in for a kiss and switching the music to something slow and sweet, his mission accomplished 

Hunk

- He is mildly surprised by the request to spar but hes a very easy going guy, as long as he has nothing else he has to do he would do whatever s/o asked him. If it makes them happy he is completely on board 

- He’s slightly on edge about it though, just because he doesn’t want to hurt them on accident. This means he focuses less on s/o and more on his own body and how hes moving. It actually makes him a pretty easy target and in simple terms s/o is easily able to kick his ass 

- S/O would notice this and would want him to losen up. S/O would grab his chin and smile in the way that makes him melt while telling him to relax and just watch them. He practically melts but he manages to comply because how could he deny a request to stare at an angel? 

-Its then that he realizes that wow they are so graceful that it should be illegal and at a certain point he stops trying to spar and is just circling around them watching them because after all this is what they wanted right? 

- He eventually gives up the whole sparring thing and just pulls them into his arms and starts to slow dance with them. S/O struggles at first not understanding what hes playing at but when he lays his forehead against theirs and whispers about how beautiful they are all bets are off. Now it is there turn to melt 

- Honestly they just end up making out in the training bay which is frowned upon but sadly is not an uncommon occurrence in the castle either. The others find them kissing in random places more often than anyone cares to admit

[bushlaboo]

if you haven’t, you should (part xxvii)

27th installment of my Olicity-centric Arrow fanfiction recommendations, parts: I, II, III, IV, V, VI,VII, VIII, IX, X, XI, XII, XIII, XIV, XV, XVI,  XVII, XVIII, XIX, XX, XXI, XXII, XXIII, XXIV, XXV & XXVI.

I am going to start off with a slew of @thatmasquedgirl recommendations. My wifey has been prolific and brilliant of late: first up, a little something I inspired, say pineapple to Masque and she thinks Psych (as should we all) and when thinking about Psych meets Olicity prompts this beautiful craziness ensues: Cat in the Cradle (Or in Felicity's Apartment). Then of course when she has a fake!psychic!Felicity AU happening and I put a little word in her ear about that version meeting fake!pyschic!Oliver this bit of delight followed: Close Company. But I’m not the only one giving her ideas, thanks to @thebookjumper's Olicity Hiatus Fic-A-Thon we’ve also been gifted with this stellar Tarzan AU: Uncharted Territory. (Seriously if Masque doesn’t write more in this verse I will cry bitter tears of woe.) Last, but never least, the latest installment in Deathstroke!Felicity: Bite the Bullet. AND OMG MASQUE JUST POSTED SOMETHING IN THE Dark, Dirty, Dangerous series – this was like my fave, after TA, until recently. I HAVE DIED AND GONE TO HEAVEN: Hostile Territory.

In the Wake of Yesterday by foreverfelicityqueen (@stydiasredstring) & holysmoaksoliver (@holysmoaksoliver ). The long awaited follow-up to Before the World Wakes. Malcolm is using Felicity, Waller is using Tommy and Oliver has finally decided to return home – without a heads up – can our beloved trio get their acts together and save the day? If you’ve haven’t read this series consider me very mad at you. It is magnificent.

The Love Thieves: Ludus by TrueMyth. Another long awaited sequel (to The Love Thieves: Amour de Soi), Felicity and Oliver are assigned a Section mission where they must play married. @truemyth has out done herself with the UST, mission stakes, and creepy bad guy. I beg of you: read, comment, and kudos.

Beneath the Shadowed Hood (There is a Mark Upon My Countenance) by geniewithwifi (@geniewithwifi). Steampunk!Soulmate AU. It is nearly impossible to describe what is going on with this fic, but it so amazing. Just go, READ IT. You won’t regret it.

Felicity Smoak and the City of Gold by acheaptrickandacheesyoneline. Part Mummy, part National Treasure and whole lot of fun … librarian Felicity Smoak gets pulled into a treasure hunt with Oliver Queen, son of the famous adventurer and treasure hunter Robert Queen, whose out to make his own mark on the world.

My Home series by adiwriting (@adiwriting ). AU series of stories where Oliver and Felicity are childhood friends separated when her mother moves them to Las Vegas. Throughout the years they maintain their more than friendship before Oliver Queen is lost at sea … or is he?

Panthera Pardus by AlexiaBlackbriar13. Another of my talented wives has been busy spinning her AU web, this time werepanther!Oliver. @alexiablackbriar13 has also updated her Man's Best Friend verse with Betrayed Hatred. So much Quentin Lance in this one and I adore it!

Hide Away {We Could Be Beautiful} by beinmyheart . No Island/Arrow AU that takes a realistic look at life for Felicity wheelchair bound as she takes on a new job as the EA to a certain CEO.

The Mirror in the Attic by Sophie1973. AU with time traveling. Felicity Smoak inherits a crumbling house from the reclusive Oliver Queen. Having no connection to him, his gift is a mystery she finds herself compelled to answer, but the impossible happens when a mirror leads her to meet Oliver Queen in the 1940s.

At the Edge of the Ocean by Bindy417 (@bindy417). Mermaid!Felicity and no crazy mercenaries (or Sara) island AU.

Not The One From Delphi by ExcellentlyEllen. Dueling vigilantes kind of, sort of AU. The Green Arrow doesn’t like the new vigilante that has popped up in Starling City, little does he know, she’s a lot closer to him than he knows.

Left To Fate by MISSYriver (@missyriver). Sort of inspired Serendipity AU. Fate brought them together and circumstances pulled them apart, but will they be able to find each other again before it is too late?

ribs are a cage (of a wild heart) by sarcastic_fina (@sarcasticfina). A Teen Wolf inspired AU. Honestly I’ve never seen the show, I am not 100% sure what is happening, but I love it anyhow.

some fairytale bliss by callistawolf (@callistawolf). Post 5.23 fic, Oliver, Felicity & gang returning to Star City. Each chapter is inspired by TheBookJumper's Olicity Hiatus Fic-A-Thon prompts.

Beyond The Spotlight by arrow_through_my_writers_block. Sort of Bodyguard-ish but so many twist. Pop star Felicity Smoak has a mysterious past that is rearing its ugly head. When threats get too close to home new bodyguard Oliver Queen is brought on to strengthen her security and keep her safe.

The Beast Within by felicityollies (@felicityollies). Soulmate AU with a twist. Oliver comes back from Lian Yu with more than just arrow-ing abilities, he’s also a werewolf.

Bonds That Can't Be Broken by Wherethereissmoak. Alpha/Beta/Omega AU where a drunken night in Vegas leads to a certain duo bonding without remembering who exactly with ... and how they find each other again. Also by @wherethereissmoak ... To supplement her income Felicity Smoak is a donor to the outed vampire population, ready to retire her last feeding job is Oliver Queen. Sparks fly and things happen:  Tastes like pure joy.

Of Sutures, Spilled Juice, and Sticky Notes by KayleeThePete. AU where paramedic Oliver Queen finds himself assisting one of the Starling City’s vigilantes (aka Felicity Smoak).

Anything But Ordinary by Hellbrat (Ringred19) . Heading into season 3 canon divergent tale where Felicity’s latent Slayer gene finally activates causing complications with Team Arrow, especially as vampires begin to pop up in Starling.

Now for some oldies (aka previous recommendations), but goodies that were recently updated:

AlexiaBlackbriar13’s Defend Not The Man, But The Mind (Bellator!Oliver. Really if I have to say more you should be ashamed of yourself.)

Abbie’s (@absentlyabbie) Way Down We Go (Part 4 of her brilliant Long Way Down series)

writewithurheart’s (@writewithurheart) There's a Machine Where My Heart Should Be (A glorious steampunk, each thought the other was dead AU)

greyhorizon’s What You Will (Modern Twelfth Night-inspired AU)

QueenKLee's The Wrong Girl. (I am legit in love with what she has done with Isabel in this fic. Not something I would ever in a million years ever think I’d say.)

SuperSillyAndDorky06’s (@supersillyanddorky06) The Predator (Rival mob AU)

dettiot (@dettiot) & Mel_Sanfo’s (@melsanfo) Two Men, Same Name (Two Olivers! What could wrong? Hint: A LOT.)

And now for a little self-promotion, my Gargoyles AU, Defenders of the Night.

[survivor-hosts]

Ep. #2: “One Woman Hall of Fun House Mirrors” - Drew

The tribes were given the music video immunity challenge. Jinsei planned out a story to go with their song and what each person will do whereas Naicha didnt seem to care much.  Jinsei obviously won.  After the results, a plan was made by Jessy and Drew to blindside MJ while MJ was trying to convince Jessy to blindside Drew. Meanwhile, Regan being uber paranoid and started freaking out in the tribe chat and telling people she is going to vote for them and making up fake advantages.  This lead everyone to change their votes to take out Regan as she was too much of a liability.  Jessy still voted for MJ even though she knew Regan was going.

update: im here but rip to my perfect game cause catherine randomized her vote

Cat: I don’t use sugar she’s cursed I’m using Christy I won with her also cat: gets voted out first I’m disappointed to see cat go first. I was really excited to play a game with her for the first time ever and I just wish there was something I could have done to help her.

Can’t wait to be second boot

[2:30:43 PM] Austin Trevino: Ok!! I’m trying to scroll back right now and catch myself up but Skype isn’t showing like half of the messages for some reason. Did we decide on an idea? [2:31:13 PM] Sam: we’re doing something LGBT+ related since it’s pride month omg the trumpie is shaking

[2017-06-12 4:08:53 AM] Jessy: this is actually crazy [2017-06-12 4:08:58 AM] Jessy: IS NO ONE GONNA DO ANYTHING?????????????????????????? [2017-06-12 4:08:59 AM] Jessy: BKLMASDFKLMASFKLMDFKLSDAFMS [2017-06-12 4:08:59 AM] Jessy: LIKE [2017-06-12 4:09:01 AM] Jessy: KLJSKLJSSKLMSKLMSKMLSKM [2017-06-12 4:09:19 AM] Jessy: THERES LEGIT GONNA BE NO VIDEO [2017-06-12 4:09:19 AM] Jessy: SLKJSLKJSKLJS [2017-06-12 4:09:22 AM] Jessy: BC THESE PPL ARE SO LAZY [2017-06-12 4:09:26 AM] Jessy: OR THEYRE JUST THROWING [2017-06-12 4:09:27 AM] Jessy: BKLMSADFLKDS [2017-06-12 4:10:51 AM] Jessy: LEGIT ITS LIKE [2017-06-12 4:10:53 AM] Jessy: SICKENING FOR ME [2017-06-12 4:10:54 AM] Jessy: TO DO NOTHING [2017-06-12 4:10:56 AM] Jessy: KLBMASKLDMDFSAMKL [2017-06-12 4:10:59 AM] Jessy: I WANNA YELL AT EVERYONE AND JUST GET TO WORK [2017-06-12 4:11:01 AM] Jessy: ME: U DO THIS! [2017-06-12 4:11:04 AM] Jessy: ME: GET THIS PROP! [2017-06-12 4:13:47 AM] Jessy: ugh it makes me mad [2017-06-12 4:13:48 AM] Jessy: KLBMASDFKDSMA [2017-06-12 7:59:26 AM] Trevor [Host of Hosts]: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

For me, this season is about Redemption. I just learned that Connah is looking to break his pre-merge curse he’s adapted to over the past few seasons played, so instantly I need to jump on that connection and form some sort of understanding between us in order to prevent him from going after me. I feel like this creates a whole lot of trust, and when the time comes where I’ll need it most I’ll be damn sure to use my allies to my advantage in securing votes. The thing with Connah is that he’s viewed as our tribe’s local Inactive. The time zone thing really does hurt his game because of my tribe consisting of sleepy old schoolers. Me, the insomniac that I am, can use this to my advantage by being Connah’s go-to for info and reliance. The problem for me though is looking back to Bhutan, where the last time I trusted someone in a different country voted me out @F5… *eyes Max*

It’s Day 4. 4 days since the game started and I’m not in game-mode yet. It’s probably because it’s been a long time since I played a main but even then, in Generations I wasn’t in game-mode at all. I may be too comfortable or I’m not on guard but I haven’t had that “spark” yet. I have no alliances yet, I’ve talked game to no one. Is this new schools Tumblr Survivor? Things are just…slow? Now I’m not sure if everyone is just feeling things out or I’m already in the minority but I just feels so detached from the game. Catherine has been voted out FIRST and that should give me motivation to do better but I didn’t feel anything. I think what made me feel so detached in games is that in the past year, I’ve played two orgs on Facebook. I didn’t mesh well with people there at all and basically became emotionless and indifferent. That in turn led me into FTC and Final 4 respectively. I’m trying to do the same thing and I thought this is Tumblr where my ORG life started I should have connections or know everyone, should be hard but it actually isn’t. People usually label me as a non-threat until late into the game but I have to be careful because I have friends on my tribe and the other tribe but if I can somehow manage to convince everyone I’m not a threat and will be helpful to them I could pull this off for the third time and make it to FTC. That’s my game plan. As for my relationships in this tribe, I’m friends with Connor for about a year. It’s almost common knowledge since we hosted 4 games together but in the event that people don’t we’re both trying to be distant to one another in the tribe chat. The next person I’m closest to (minus Connor ofc) is probably Jessy but we haven’t talked game yet. I’m still kinda feeling things out. I don’t know how to end this confessional PS I have 4 outdated video confessionals because I can’t upload them BECAUSE NO INTERNET !!! FUTURE JOSH REMEMBER THIS MOMENT AFTER THE GAME IS OVER AND HOW YOU FELT THIS CLOSE TO SUING THE INTERNET COMPANY

Catherine deserves all the good things in the world by the way. She’s an angel. Please let the Phoenix Idol be the Arabia twist.

Okay but in all seriousness, can I tell you how scary it was to see my name come up last night… like Catherine made no effort to communicate with anyone so she can’t say “no ones talking to me” when she doesn’t do the same. Communication is a two way street, you get what you put into any conversation. Idk I just find her to be very hypocritical and don’t really feel bad that she was the first boot. I really want to push for a David/Andrew/Myself alliance, but for the moment I am worried that David and Sam are close and he would spill the beans. I feel like Sam is pretty well rounded in this tribe and that kinda worries me, but I can’t do anything about it so early you know?? But I think I have something solid with Andrew, I feel like Austin trusts me, and I have the Amulet of Abduction in my possession. If things go south, I think I have the tools needed to reverse the car and drive north. Now thinking about it, maybe Catherine voting me out was a good thing because the other tribe could possibly think I’m in the minority and save me for the next round. Who knows honestly, but one could hope. I really have no idea what could happen and I think my paranoia at that tribal during the live call has people questioning me. However, I did contribute a lot to this challenge and I think that puts me in good graces. I suggested the LGBT theme in celebration of Pride Month, which got us going somewhere with our video. I really hope we win mainly because I think our challenge idea is so cute, and if the judges don’t see that then they got something wrong with them. Heres to hoping we win this challenge so I have one peaceful night of sleep

omg austin writing #lovetrumpshate on his sign… me: *blurs it out in the video* i hate that i have to be on a tribe with a trumpie… i just hate it so much… it sucks that i actually get along with him? godt

me when we win this music video challenge

so yeah if we don’t win this challenge it’s plain homophobia

So basically the last vote was super easy except our tribe literally doesnt talk….Sam and I had to get the ball rolling which is weird for me because I never take part in that but I guess im like the leader of the tribe or something (Not really) Im really good with Sam like I think we are going to be a solid 2 going into a swap. Im good with Andrew and Lydia and Austin as well. Sam and I want to get an alliance chat of those people + Scott going so that we can have majority and no one feels left out and we can vote out Connor if needed. The music video we will hopefully and and then I wont have to worry about getting 15th! 

[13/06/2017, 10:21:03 AM] Josh: I can talk when I get to my desk! I’m driving atm [13/06/2017, 10:23:14 AM] Regan: Okay thanks lmk [13/06/2017, 10:37:35 AM] Regan: you drive slow

A plan to blindside Drew has been made but I’m not sure if it wise. On one side, Drew is a huge threat and he’s on everyone’s good side, but if we’re swapping tomorrow it’s not ideal to have a broken tribe. Only me, Jessy, MJ and Regan know about this and it’s enough to send Drew home but that would leave Connor and Allison out of the loop. I’m more concerned about burning the bridge I have with Connor that’s why I’m gonna try and pull off a unanimous vote. Or at least a 5-2 vote. I need Connor’s trust and more importantly it’s only the first tribal we’re going and I’m already hiding things from Connor. I’m at a dilemma. My vote seems to be the deciding factor if we keep Regan or not. We still have a lot of time to think about the vote and I think it’s better to have a full on discussion together with MJ and Jessy and see what we’re gonna do. For right now I’m gonna feel out Connor and see what he thinks of possibly blindsiding Drew.

So we won the challenge and we did that, the judges just knew not to be homophobic. But honesty the other tribes vid was not that good so we had this shit down. I think Regan is going and thank god because apparently she was trying to kidnap me and im like please get out before you ruin me thanks. I love Matt Summers so much also because we had a little tea session and it was juicy. he told me about the Regan stuff and I told him about why we voted out Cat seaux I hope if theres a swap we are good

Oh okay the game’s starting now huh. I’m sorry in advance, dear readers, this is gonna be lengthy as fuck, I really should’ve done a Meet the People confessional the first week but I got lazy so here we are! So first and foremost, I’d like to personally thank Steffen for messaging me after immunity results like WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT MUSIC VIDEO because we know, babe. We know. Dramatic little fuck, ilysm. ANYWAY my ass is making some interesting mistakes! We’re gonna break this lil confessional section into three segments because it’s how I’m processing my thoughts: All Stars, Congo, and Pacific Islands. 1.        When I first walked into this tribe, my first thought was “OH look, three All Stars kids! Well that can’t happen!” and then they turn out to be…….the only…….people…………I talk to???????? dkjlshlkfjhgKJHFLKJSHD kill me now honestly. So now this is the crew I’m accidentally rolling with for at least this first vote. MJ gave me a call on like night two like “I wanna work with you until the end, I think we could go really really far together and it’s not something people would see coming” and I’m like WHEW this probably means I’m not first boot huh. Like okay if by some miracle or twist of fate, I’m actually capable of making FTC here, I’m not going with no damn MJ, but realistically who says no to an F2? Jessy is a fucking angel, and the only person who will semi-reliably reach out and just say hey, which I’m not sure I’ve ever done with her. Actually, because this is reminding me, I’m gonna go do that right now! … kk now that that’s done. She’s a sweetheart, I don’t ever want to do anything against her or without her. Like I will if I have to, don’t you worry about that, but it would hurt. And then Matt Summers who I’ve talked to like twice since the season started because he’s always busy but like they were real conversations, it wasn’t even anything game-related, we like poured our hearts out to each other. And now he’s been kidnapped so he’s not on the table anyway. But like honestly truthfully, these All Star kids are the good eggs of the beach, I could actually see working with them for a while (cut to Connor and Josh and Allison’s confessionals saying the same thing because they’ve gotten the same calls and the same messages and I’m actually just that easy to manipulate). 2.        Okay, Congo. Congo is a side season I won a million years ago. Hosted by Connor, Josh, and Cat. So when they all popped up here, two of them on my tribe, best believe I was SCREAMING. And it was cute until I realized the main season history that Cat and Josh had and how that wouldn’t last. And sure enough, Miss Cat was the first to die and that wasn’t completely unexpected but damn why these bitches have to take my secret pair beware??? We literally saw Moana together in theaters, I’d have thrown away my entire game for her. But this boot is probably a better case scenario because now fewer people are looking at Josh and Connor, they lost their footing on the other tribe and are just in general softer more passive people, at least outwardly. Everyone knows they’re connected, Josh hosted Connor in Palawan and they did Arabia together, but I don’t know that I’m exactly linked with them, which is great right now because if we can manage to work together on a lower radar for a while, it could end up being very very helpful in getting things together moving forward in new tribe configurations. 3.        Oh Pacific Islands…….a mess. This is Regan and Allison. Allison is an interesting case because on the one hand I love her, she’s one of my favorite hosts, I’ve been hosted by her in three Pacific Islands games before, she’s a lot of fun. But she knows how I play these days. She and Andrew actually did a cast assessment for PI Johto, which was Heroes vs Villains, and some of the things they said were spot-on but not things I want out. Allison talks about how she wishes I’d been cast on the villains tribe because I’m like secretly cutthroat as fuck, willing to stab literally anyone in the back, may not be seen as a villain but has very villainous characteristics. And Andrew is like Drew is super hard to read, you can have an image in your head of Drew’s game and who he’s aligned with and you could be completely wrong and then suddenly you’re the one working with him and making moves, but it’s never shady. And like true but fuck. So like Allison knowing this much about my game, having hosted me through to the finale episode three times, seen me win one and get player of the season once, is a bit of a scary concept because I’m LIVING for the fact that I’m mostly an unknown entity to these people, like MJ and Matt might know bits of my record and stories from Kait or being in VLs or whatever but so few of them have seen me play and I’m ready to not be nearly as known. And then Regan is just being……..whew. Imagine messaging everyone 20 seconds after the challenge ended, like actually everyone, schedule calls with them, literally tell someone on call that you’re leaving to go talk to someone else instead, frantically messaging the tribe chat like “I know I’m the easy choice” “I just want to beat my best placement” like babe we all do, this is a returning season and only two of these flops have won, we’re all hungry to at least better ourselves. She’s been rubbing people the wrong way, especially Connor and MJ. I don’t think anyone except Allison would lift a finger to save her. BUT HERE’S THE THING, THEY MIGHT NOT HAVE TO. Regan. Got. A. Vote. Stealer. From the idol map. Which is apparently a thing! So in this tribe of seven, literally all she needs to stay is me and Allison and her vote stealer. I mean granted, she doesn’t have me and I don’t think she knows that yet, but it’s a nice concept, very cute. Like I’m not going to stick my neck out for her on literally the first vote when if we don’t swap and Matt comes back, everything could quickly fall apart for me. Plus another layer. I have the map now. And Regan is the only one who knows that it’s even a POSSIBILITY that I might. She didn’t EXACTLY tell me so even she might not realize it. She was trying to be vague like “It’s on the blog, it’s super obvious but not something you’d ever think to search for, like what specifically would you be looking for” so I tried board, then grid, then map and BAM. So I make my very first search and find a vote negator!! Oh do I already have big dreams for this little baby This place could be a fucking gold mine for me moving forward, if no one knows that I have it and I never have to expose that I do until it’s time. I was never a captain, I never got a clue, who would look at poor little Drew for any sort of power? Regan, that’s who, who knows if she’d even guess that I did figure it out after all, I never told her I did, but she knows what she told me. Which is why she absolutely has to leave now because she’s the only one who could know. Now I have a way to test the loyalty of whoever becomes captain next, and at least for the moment, of accumulating wealth without anyone knowing. Part of me wants to go for broke and ask Regan what places she’s already searched but I’m not pushing my luck and forcing her to realize that I made it to the map. That’s on her to figure out. I don’t know where I’m going from here, Trevor said it would be beneficial to be on Skype after tribal tonight, which probably means a swap. Which sucks a little because I have a pretty good connection with everyone here right now, I fit into all three of the groups listed above, I think I might actually end up in alliance chats with all three by the time tribal rolls around. But I’ll find new friends if I have to. I’m a lot more confident in my ability since the last time I did a main season, and I’m finally in a season where I can potentially be looked over and befriended as a number and might not have to fight quite as hard to dodge the immediate threat edit. I’m nowhere near the passive player I used to be. Who knows if I’ll win this season, but I was not proud of my performance in Sri Lanka and Bangladesh, so it’s time to have a main season experience I can look back on and say I did that. This vote negator and I are gonna go find some friends and get down to business!

[2017-06-12 5:52:25 PM] Jessy: ughhh [2017-06-12 5:52:28 PM] Jessy: i hate this [2017-06-12 5:52:38 PM] Jessy: keeping regan is better on THIS tribe [2017-06-12 5:52:49 PM] Jessy: but im just giving away three free allies to sam and lydia [2017-06-12 8:06:55 PM] Jessy: I love Regan but like I can totally picture being in trouble with her, Matt and Allison if we were to make this move. Making enemies out of Drew, Josh, Connor and MJ is literally so fucking scary but I don’t want to regret this later on thinking that I should have made the move so that this season wouldn’t end with a winner like Sam, Lydia or MJ. But I also don’t want to be one of those players who only make “big moves” just for the flashiness of it. [2017-06-12 9:47:46 PM] Jessy: okay U know what? [2017-06-12 9:48:00 PM] Jessy: I completely understand the logic Matt implied [2017-06-12 9:48:13 PM] Jessy: but here’s the thing. OPPORTUNITY! [2017-06-12 9:48:35 PM] Jessy: By voting out Regan I’m accepting a position at the bottom of an alliance that not only has numbers on my tribe but the other tribe as well [2017-06-12 9:48:53 PM] Jessy: So yes it does make enemies of the other tribe, but the opportunity I have rn is to take out the person that connects them [2017-06-12 9:48:58 PM] Jessy: the head of the snake. [2017-06-12 9:49:21 PM] Trevor [Host of Hosts]: wheres your confessional

Anyways scratch all this bc Regan is targeting me apparently so she’s DONE.

last night lydia and i agreed that we should make a 4 with connor and scott and try to take out austin cause david suggest a 4 between me, austin, him and andrew right before the cat vote but now david is including me, andrew, scoot and lydia in an alliance YIKES G2G!!!!!!

Scratch that it looks like we’re voting Regan again

So the first tribal council was pretty successful aside from the fact that Connor was left out of the loop. But honestly I’m over that. I’ve been talking to him a little more lately and same with Lydia so trying to keep those social connections up! I would give a more extensive recap but essentially the challenge went fine except for a marker fiasco where a new purple marker fresh out the box exploded all over my table…..anyway! Scott and I have been getting closer and he’s really cool tbh. He told me today that I’m his #1 and that he wants to go through everything in this game with me “at his side” and I’m like alrighty! Hope he’s not saying that to anyone else lmao. In terms of other people, David and I have been good and Sam and I have on and off convos - sometimes involving strategy and other times not. Lydia and Connor I’ll talk to here and there but not about strategy. And then there’s the fun Forced Austin Convos™… Okay I ain’t gonna be mean like the conversations I have with him are genuine but also never go anywhere? Like I guess we have each other’s backs which is fine. I’m just waiting for him to really REALLY strike something with me but he doesn’t which I guess is fine because I don’t trust him and therefore wanna vote him out. The big development of the day though was David and I got an alliance going. I basically just cracked open a cold one with the boy and said let’s talk an alliance and before I knew it he was getting Sam I was getting Scott and Sam was getting Lydia. This is also good for me getting close to Lydia btw! Keeping that in mind. Also David wanted Lydia and I wanted Scott but my messages fucked up so we ended up getting both of them? Which is fine… I think. We were going for a 4 person alliance but I’ll work with 5 the best I can. I just needed Scott to be involved. That was a top priority. So now the other tribe’s tribal is tonight and from all the completely expected game related shit Matt has talked on Regan - she’s going home. BUT. This is a main season. Ya never know what wackadoodle-Dan shit is gonna happen.

[1:15:02 AM] Jessy: THIS TRIBE IS SO CRACKEDT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [1:17:00 AM] Jessy: MJ IS SENDING MIXED SIGNALS! [1:17:02 AM] Jessy: LIKE SIS! [7:45:09 AM] Trevor [Host of Hosts]: What’s happening [7:45:13 AM] Trevor [Host of Hosts]: Make a confessional

things are… confusing yet also very straight forward. the vote was pretty clean cut on being regan, then things.. well, they happened. regan told drew that she heard her name from mj (mj i think???) and then she was like BUT i heard your name from mj. so drew messaged me like ‘what is the happen’ and i was like, well, i have never heard your name so thats probably not happening. regan told drew that she has a vote stealer and is going to try and take mj’s vote and vote for mj, but frankly the vote steal probably isnt real. i have a good thing going with allison, i like her a lot and i really hope to work with her deep into this game. im hoping to pull together an alliance of myself, josh, mj, drew, and allison and then a counter one? with everyone else. that would leave me in the middle which is where i play games best. im just hoping regan goes. i know she would be an easy shield down the road, but theres just no clear target going into this vote, and especially with her having a vote steal, taking her out with it and seeing if it’s something that exists will be very beneficial in the long run.

So I really am happy that we ended up winning the immunity challenge. Beforehand I was so scared cause we lost the first immunity and I didn’t want to go back to tribal after receiving a vote at the last one. Plus I don’t know who they would have kidnapped which really scared me. Lydia and I also discussed who we should end up kidnapping outside of the tribe. She was really worried about her relationship with Matt Summers and their previous game history, so she felt it was best to kidnap him. I personally didn’t give a fuck so I just went with it. Even though if we kidnapped Regan, it would have easily changed their tribe dynamic since Matt confirmed that she was an easy vote. I kinda wish he would have like actually given info on the dynamics so I could know who to abduct if we end up never swapping. Also, I’m low key surprised that Regan told the other tribe I had a final 2 with her mainly cause I don’t and know that she’s bad for my game being here. She also told them she wouldn’t take me to the end, which really has me thinking I’m a huge threat on their side. Personally, I think there are more fish to fry on my tribe over myself, so I hope I don’t go home anytime soon. Lydia also told me she talked to Connah and he seems to have a fire lit under him because he’s more motivated now. Which I’m happy about cause he did a phenomenal job on our video. If the tribes do stay the same and we lose again, I would personally like to see Austin go over Connah. Lydia and I compared notes on how Austin’s conversations come across as very fake and in genuine, and like hes only talking to us through a game perspective. I just find Austin to be fishy. Today, Sam told me that Lydia and I would be approached by Andrew and David about an alliance. And she even told us that she has a separate alliance with just Andrew and David. I’m actually happy she told me this mainly because now I have info against her for down the road. Andrew approached me moments later about it and I acted like I had just heard this. So I got added to an alliance with Andrew/David/Sam/Myself called the Pure Four. I’m happy that this alliance was made cause it was the alliance that I wanted, but right now I just feel very suspicious if that makes sense. I think the smartest thing for my game is to lay low until the moment is right. Who knows if that will happen though mainly cause if I use the Amulet of Abduction premerge, it makes me a pretty big target going into the merge. It sucks cause I want to tell Andrew so I can further our trust but I can’t tell him without exposing the Three Muskequeers (Sam/Lydia/Myself) and why Lydia was chosen to be captain was to help our alliance. So right now I just need to lay low and hope that Regan didn’t completely ruin my reputation on the other tribe

I swear to god, Regan is like a one woman hall of funhouse mirrors and all we’re trying to do is walk a straight line.

So IDK IM GETTING VOTED OUT AN DIM FREAKING. ITS ME OR MJ ME OR MJ I HATE LIFE