#its simultaneously eloquent and stream of condciousness

[enbyfication]

oh wow, you cut your own hair? i have a trans friend who cuts his own hair as well and idk what they do but its simply gorgeous to look at; wavy but short and smooth. im sure your hair also looks amazing and hopefully, it'll kick dysphoria's ass! you pose an interesting predicament but what if i wanted to rest my head on your knee? or use my own hands to just rub against your legs or even thighs...depends on how tall you are. just moving my hands up and down to massage you and let you know that im appreciative. you'd at least have to let me do something with my hands, right? it wouldn't be fair that i would be the only one enjoying myself from it... unless you're getting pleasure out of me cleaning your fingers and watching me do that. okay, that thought is kinda hot but i'm only cleaning them because they're dirty, okay? and the sink is too far away without you having to get up and leave so this will have to do for now. you know what i mean, right? that's the only reason im doing it - dont you think of cupping my face in one of your hands or scratching my chin either. dont ask why, those arent like sweet spots or anything!

aa sorry if this is too much, i got a little bit "motivated" to respond right before i go to sleep.

ah, no!! i buzzed it aka i took an electric shaver to it - slightly longer on the top n rlly short on the back and sides. was super easy hehe & took no skill at all, no way I cld ever cut my own hair. that's so impressive though!! unfortunately im in a top spot bc id love long hair but my hair grows up n out into curls instead of down so it looks v masc no matter what i do:/ i am like sisyphus cutting and growing out my hair tryna achieve androgyny. the short is keeping dysphoria at bay for the moment though:)

and no, no, of course I understand. my fingers are dirty and you're helping me clean them, as best you can, and I'm so grateful for that. and if you want to hold my fingers, my wrists with your hands so you can better clean then, well that makes sense too! but of course I'd have to watch, to make sure you were doing it right. because at the end of the day, I could always get up and clean them myself. so you've gotta keep me there. and I've gotta keep an eye on you to make sure you're really giving me all your attention