#its not reasonable to ban stuff cause you don't personally like how it looks. it's not OK to decide someones wrong cause they arent doing it

[gunsli-01]

just wanna say since I've been away from fixating on milgram for a month or so and came back for a skim (I got my therapist hooked, so its on the mind).. I wanna say how the fuck did this happen but I've similar enough that like, I hope you're taking care of yourself, congrats on the marriage (thats recent right?), your posts are always nice to see, I hope Organ Thief's Dance Party is entertaining for you too

I got so carried away beneath this cut that it's just a new Mu post I'm sorry in advance! Before any of that though I'll try to answer your points to the best of my abilities!

I'm so happy to hear about the therapist thing! I hope more people can enjoy Milgram so many that getting to a million views is pretty much immediate during trial three!

I think conflicts appearing in the fandom in and of itself isn't a bad thing it just means people care about the material, but I hope people can do that in a fun and respectful way. Not only to make the environment comfortable for old fans but newcomers as well. I don't believe it's good for fandoms to become exclusionary or too closeknit since that can lead to terrible forms of conflict down the line.

A fandom should be full of various people and opinions. So, I always wanna remind people to look at the views of others outside of mine since it helps form a more well-rounded opinion. It's even helped me better reflect on my own biases. I do like passion, but too much of anything in one direction can be bad, and I want more and more people to like and watch Milgram! So, regardless of what happens, I want people to see the fun in it not just from the content but its fans who do great things in a passionate way every day.

I'm taking care of myself and my dad to the best of my abilities he surgery went smoothly too! I'm still very much enjoying Milgram all the way! I hope none of what I said about the fandom comes off as pretentious or too serious because I know it'd be easy to read it that way. When it comes to the marriage, I assume you're referring to my blog description.

Ah, Star and I have known each other since late 2013! We met through Tumblr actually. That's why I was so upset to have my blog shadow banned because it has a lot of sentimental value and I'd hate to lose it. We started dating maybe three years after and we got engaged two to three years after that. Though, since we live in different countries, we haven't officially tied the knot yet. She's my best friend, confidant, and we hang out often. Even meeting up in person whenever we can manage/afford to.

Actually, she's the reason anybody even gets to see me talk about Milgram at all right now. She introduced it to me! She wanted me to look over the entire series. Because she was very well acquainted with my penchant for deductive reasoning and love of solving mysteries. Because of thar she wanted to know what I would think was going on based off the trial one music videos alone. I was a bit miffed at her at the time, so I was like, no, I don't wanna.

Though she went if I didn't want to watch all of it then she'd at least like it if I looked at Mahiru's song. Causing my response to Mahiru's first trial song to pretty much be you trying to say something about me, huh?! However, I really loved it and pretty immediately went okay I'll watch the rest. However, that was only after she asked what I thought happened and the only thing I could think was with the focus on food, probably poisoning, but other than that I'm unsure.

So, I'm very nostalgic when it comes to Mahiru's song since it's related to a person I love.

If you don't want all the personal stuff here's the Milgram stuff!

I think the thing I'm looking most forward too is hearing Shidou's cover of Delusion Tax given how the VA handled Liar Dance! Shidou's voice tends to be more reserved when it comes to singing his original songs but go hard in his covers. Mu is the exact opposite, her voice being stronger in her original songs but going to a gentle whisper in her covers.

Showing the dichotomy between how she presents herself and how she may be inwardly. That outward appearance of dominance breaking into a soft-spoken stint. While Shidou's soft demeanor breaks way into a more domineering tone with hard enunciation that's so good to hear. So, I'm really curious if that will stay in Delusion Tax just like it stayed for Mu with MKDR.

I like Mu's covers far more than her original songs because of that vocal change and the subtle gentleness like holding porcelain. Especially the scream here and how it directly contrasts with the one here. Her covers really highlight that similarity between her and Futa of putting on a tough front but having an incredibly soft interior that needs a lot of nurturing from their environments.

Something also highlighted by her being represented as Parasitic Wasp in It's Not My Fault.

One of the insects that build cocoons on a host and use the nutrients off them to feed their young. Meaning It's Not My Fault we are literally seeing an artistic rendition of a Parasitic Wasp nest being built on a beehive.

Explaining why Mu is so large in comparison to the others. It's a literal hostile takeover until she gets enough of what she needs and leaves.

This also explains why she's so quick to leave and nothing remains when she does in the end. Since they eat everything and go. Yet, it has another meaning too! Mu being a parasitic wasp can be read as her leeching off of a society of course but it can also be read as her needing external validation to support her own beliefs. Showcasing that she lacks the mental fortitude necessary to defend or rationalize her own behavior or past actions.

This is highlighted in After pain when she's literally drowned in her own negative opinion of herself. Something that used to be feeding her is now eating away at her. Because it doesn't come with that sweetness of external validation. No one else is saying that she's right so she'll always wonder if she's wrong on some level. Because she's incapable of validating her own behavior this is even shown in It's Not My Fault when she basically begs the viewers not to hate her or even look for her bad side the source of her pain.

In a, "Just keep liking me, keep feeding me, I can't do it I can't take it on my own." In a way, reminiscent to the way Mikoto freaks out when everybody, but Kotoko wishes him a happy birthday. It also feeds into why her victim ignoring her bothered her so much and she couldn't let it go. The reason she's behaving this way is perfectly illustrated at the end of It's Not My Fault where she's literally reformed by the previous verdict and breaks away from her host, in this case the hourglass.

Something that very much comes through in the tone of her cover songs. While Shidou- Ah, his are so full of that usually restrained animosity of his that I just love! So, that mixed with Delusion Tax may just get me.

[rainyraisin]

OKAY SO, RETICENT INFO DUMPS!!! The first half of Raph's wasn't in my notes so I had to steal it from Instagram. These are from 2 weeks ago so the characters have more to them at this point but I'll only keep infodumping if people ask :)

Raph continuation:

Raph is the only brother other than Leo who goes up to the surface, usually to get more fun things for his brothers rather than what they genuinely need. Mikey receives spray paint gear and painting supplies, also said to be from Splinter, but Raph suspects he knows who its truly from. He hides in his room whenever Splinter actually does visit so he doesn't get into a fight with him and "scare him off" for a few months. The only crime Raph really commits is stealing. Despite his temper and tendency to get into fights, he's actually quite responsible. He's the one who stops his twin from committing too many crimes. The vandalism he permits, the arson he does not. He wants to be closer to Mikey and Leo.

Mikey:

Mikey is 15 and the younger twin by 2 days!!! He's more of a traditional artist and enjoys painting. He was introduced to spraypainting by April and does it around the lair pre-season 1, to Splinter and therefore Leo's dismay. Following the start of season 1, he starts doing spraypainting with Casey which was a big bonding activity for them. Mikey struggles with expressing anger verbally and does it through other things like burning stuff or going out to spraypaint. He was almost caught by the police once due to him being too loud and disturbing the peace whilst spraypainting to relieve some stress. He's the best cook in the family and when he was deemed old enough by Leo he was allowed to start cooking for them (with supervision of course, and Leo handled things like knives). He wants to be a cool older brother to Donnie but tries a bit too hard and kinda just comes off as weird yet kind funny. They're still not the closest though. He wants to be closer to Donnie and Raph. Later on he bonds with Donnie a bit through baking as his little brother enjoys the chemistry part of it (he is completely banned from the stove though). Raph is their taste-tester.

Donnie:

Donnie!! The youngest at 13!!! (And a half as he will constantly remind you). Donnie is autistic but literally has no fucking clue, just like the twins with their ADHD. He's a bit clingy to Raph and shares similar traits to him due to spending the majority of his life around him. He acts the same way around April as Mikey does around him, trying to be a cool little brother. April doesn't understand what the hell he's trying to do. He questions why Splinter brings him materials for his inventions yet seems so disapproving of them. Donnie feels like his brothers view him as a liability first and family second. Leo tends to try keep him out of the way a lot of the time, mostly when sparring, which leads to him being weaker than his brothers in that aspect, although Raph eventually has enough and begins sparring with him in secret. Don is the reason they met April as he went out looking for Splinter when he was 9 and got lost, only finding his way back to his brothers due to April offering to help him. He stole Leo's coat so the majority of his features are covered up. She only realises that shit might not be right here when he tells her he lives down in the sewers but like, is she really gonna leave a kid to get home alone??? No, ofc not.

April:

April! The oldest of the group at 17!! She will lord the fact that shes just over a month older than Casey over him for the rest of his life. April acts quite apathetic and snarky but genuinely does want to help her brothers cause she cares a lot about them. She just doesn't know how to and she feels so guilty about it. She also tries not to get too involved in their personal stuff because she thinks that they don't view her as a sister. She hasn't met Splinter yet but has heard a lot about him from Raph and isn't very fond of him. She doesn't like Casey too much at first as she's worried he'll break their trust and reveal her brothers' existence to the world but over time they grow closer and become friends. When she first met the turtles, she was a bit freaked out cause holy shit there are mutant turtles in the sewers why why why why why- But she came to realise that they were just kids trying to survive and warmed up to them quickly. She came round as often as she could to make sure they were okay and eventually bought them all radios in order to keep in contact with them better (she let Donnie mess with them to increase the range). Very supportive of her brothers cause like, who else is gonna be? Their dad sure isnt and she's the only one who knows about them otherwise (until a certain goofy guy comes along)

Casey:

Casey Jones!! Second oldest of the overall group, also at 17!!! He's just less 17 than April (don't question me I can english). He's the catalyst for the series as a whole and is completely confused by what the fuck is going on the majority of the time- bro is just slowly learning how fucked up this family is and he's just like "ARE U GUYS OKAY??? 💀💀💀". He wants to help the sillies stop being so damn emotionally constipated. He is also a silly little vigilante guy‼️‼️‼️ He is not very good at it but don't tell him that he's trying his best. He also plays hockey cause he slays like that. He is very loser/affectionate. He's definetly been arrested a couple of times although never actually sent to jail or anything, just made to wait with an officer until his dad comes to pick him up. He acts way more confident than he is. (I have way less on him than everyone else atm lmao I'm sorry)

Also just realised, here's a very old Leo infodump, like literally from the second day of Reticent's existence

Anyway if there's anyone who wants to know more about all of the sillies or even just one particular silly, throw an ask into the box!!! :D

[dear-ao3]

look guys, i know i say that every update to this post is insane. but this one is. incredibly. and insanely. bonkers. every turn in here is a left.

i don't even know how to begin this one, but welcome to australia, the race where no one knows how to act, everyone always collectively looses their shit, and this weekend they might have lost their shit a bit more than usual. today is march 25, 2024. grab a snack, make a drink, hold onto your hats and also your socks, cause this is the most insane update of the season thus far. and its very very long.

and before you skip this one cause you think its going to be another max win, spoiler: MAX VERSTAPPEN DIDNT WIN

now that i have everyone's attention, it has been two weeks since we last spoke. meaning that we are going to cover the race week and the off week drama.

oh also, everyone who complains about how long this post is, you all asked for this!! you said to keep it on one post and i am committing to the bit!! the post is staying!! block the tag if you want!!!

honestly the off week was kinda quiet, but there was still some good stuff.

like the ongoing red bull fiasco:

-they seem pretty allergic to talking about it but in short

-helmut marko is Not getting fired or banned or whatever they were going to do to him (supposedly)

-they were going to do that because they ordered him to stop talking to the press and then he kept talking to the press

-there was a rumor that horner was going to be let go before the australian gp

-this turned out to be fake

-reportedly though adrian newey is unhappy with the current red bull situation

-(aren't we all)

-and supposedly, according to AMuS, horner wants to move him from red bull f1 racing to the hypercar project that they have for supposed budget cap reasons. which seems kinda silly when hes the one who is making the car that is making them win everything

-also supposedly, newey has been in talks with ferrari, possibly in response to this

-according to sports illustrated, theres still an ongoing power struggle at red bull, and talks between newey and ferrari are supposedly at an "advanced stage" this isn't even the first time ferrari have tried to get newey, they tried back in 2014, but he decided to stay on with red bull. but newey has said that he has always wanted to work with lewis hamilton, who is going to ferrari for 2025, so this could be his shot

-and the person who accused horner appealed the decision to dismiss the complaint to both red bull and to the fia. i couldn't find a real source for that but a lot of accounts reported on it. she also appealed her suspension from red bull (i think this was back on march 16) and nothing has been said about this

-horner though did say this at the saudi press conference : "the reality is that there was a grievance that was raised. it was dealt with in the most professional manner by the group, not red bull racing, but the owners of red bull racing, red bull gmbh, who appointed an independent kc that is one of the most reputable ccs in the land. he took the time to investigate fully, all of the fats. and he came to the conclusion where he dismissed the grievance. as far as im concerned, as far as red bull is concerned, we move forward and we look to the future." (bbc)

-well. one person really didnt like this, and that was mr ralf schumacher, ex f1 driver and michael schumacher's brother

-hes already told horner to step down, but he got more intense: "it became problematic for me when he portrayed himself as a victim in the press conference in saudi arabia. im sorry for his family, yes, but there was only one person who started this whole thing: him. I think it can no longer be denied that he and his personal assistant must have become very close. i can't accept that he keeps saying he doesnt want to talk about it in detail....one thing is certain, as long as this chaos remains, it will do immense damage to red bull. horner said that no one is more important than the team. therefore, he should follow this command and resign as soon as possible." full interview here

-so. yeah. yikes on bikes for red bull as per the usual.

still confused? maybe this graphic from formula.room on ig can help:

but that was not all for red bull in the off week.

this next bit is kind of stupid but its important to me and its my post so i am including it.

redbull does promotional cans to promote their athletes, and previously they have had a whole bunch of their f1 drivers on limited edition red bull cans. now right after the singapore grand prix last year, a limited edition red bull can was released with both max and checo on it, meant to promote the us races (austin and las Vegas) and it happened to coincide with max's 3rd world championship victory. the can looked like this:

(hilariously the cans also featured a link to try and set a fast lap on one of the tracks to win tickets or something but it was written as "got what it takes" and then the link, fully implying they were looking for someone to replace checo)

but anyway. my local target usually has a nice display of these and as the season ended i saw less and less of them until it was kind of just sporadic, like they were cleaning out old stock. which is understandable, cause theyre limited edition, and its a new season of racing.

so last week i went to target and low and behold, a new red bull can greeted me:

max. just max. on the can. in ter est ing.

i did a bit of digging and all i found was this on the red bull website:

To mark the 20th anniversary of Oracle Red Bull Racing, Red Bull is unveiling a limited-edition can and pack featuring the iconic Oracle Red Bull Racing branding, showcasing three-time World Champion driver Max Verstappen and the Red Bull F1 car. The exclusive Red Bull Racing cans and packs will hit store shelves by late March 2024, coinciding with the launch of the 2024 season and in anticipation of three U.S. grand prix races. This collectible item celebrates the spirit of Red Bull Racing.

now this is Intriguing. previously, other drivers (seb and daniel) have also had their own special edition cans to celebrate them doing something or other, but their teammate also usually had one of themselves. a few year back i am Pretty sure that daniel and max each had their own can. and max and checo have appeared on cans together in previous years. and red bull has two drivers. so why. only one of them.

well.

the logical explanation here is that stuff like this goes into production months in advance and they wanted to celebrate max's third championship. but checo was on the can also the last few years.

now. towards the end of last year, there was very heavy speculation that checo was going to get replaced by daniel because checo was causing all kinds of problems for red bull. and if we recall all the way back up to the top of this post where i talked about daniels contract, its rumored that if checos doing badly daniel gets to replace him.

so. it is possible. that perhaps checo isn't on the can. because they weren't sure they would be keeping him for the whole season. and they still might not keep him the whole season. he has done well For Now, but he historically has a strong start to the season and then kind of fades into the problem realm.

is this far fetched? absolutely. but its red bull. anything is possible with red bull.

moving on from the raging dumpster fire, gunther steiner made a reappearance in the form of the gunther steiner column on f1.com:

-basically he said that if he were still a team principal he would sign ollie bearman. hes worked with ollie before because last year ollie did a few practice sessions in the haas car. and after his saudi drive gunther said that

For prospective employers, that drive will have taken a lot of doubts away of what he is able to do. He’s in a good place as at the end of this year, there are a lot of contracts up with drivers, so he can put himself in good a position. He can’t go anywhere he wants, but I believe there is more than one opportunity for him.

-he also said that he stayed at haas for too long and has liked being away from the track. he would come back, but only for the right project

then we have filipe massa who sued the fia finally over the 2008 world championship:

-this has been going on for awhile and i dont know a whole lot about it so if you want more info do your own research but to my basic and general understanding

-at the 2008 Singapore gp nelson piquet jr, driving for Renault (now alpine) purposefully crashed his car to help his teammate fernando alonso win the race

-at the time, people did not know that the crash was deliberate and it only came out a year later after piquet left the team that he had been ordered to do so by the Renault team principal at the time (flavio briatore) and the engineer (pat symonds) and renault was charged with conspiracy and race fixing, which were charges they did not contest and had the team principal and the engineer leave the team

-reguardless of that, the crash caused some problems during the race itself and without getting too into it, basically everyone came into the pits during the safety car to get fuel and tires (this was back when they did refueling during the races, they stopped cause its dangerous) and Filipe massa was prematurely released from his pitstop with the fuel hose still attached to his car and into the line of another car. the hose was removed and he was able to rejoin the grid, but was given a penalty and ultimately finished i 13th place

-fernando alonso was able to pit before the piquet crash and that ultimately made him win the race

-anyway, massa claims that this race is what caused him to lose the 2008 world championship to lewis hamilton (massa was one point behind Hamilton) and had the piquet crash been investigated the outcome of the world championship would have gone into his favor.

-you can read the further race play by play on wikipedia if youre interested

-hes suing for

“a declaration that the FIA acted in breach of its own regulations in failing to investigate the circumstances of the crash promptly in 2008” and “a declaration that if the FIA had not acted in breach of its own regulations, it would have canceled or adjusted the results of the Singapore Grand Prix with the consequence that Mr Massa would have won the drivers’ championship in 2008.

and 82 million dollars.

in the spirit of legal action, susie wolff filed a criminal complaint against the fia:

-have i talked about susie wolff before? i dont remember. in case i haven't, she's in charge of the f1 academy (the woman's junior division of formula racing) and she is also married to toto wolff, the mercedes team principal.

-back in december the fia stated a conflict of interest case because they thought that susie and toto had been sharing confidential information with eachother that the other was not supposed to know. i dont think they ever actually said it was toto and susie, but they said that it was "an allegation that confidential information was being passed between a team member and a member of the sport’s owner Formula One Management (FOM)." and susie is a member of fom.

-initially people thought that perhaps another f1 team had complained about this to the fia (because they do that sometimes) but then every single team released a near identical statement stating that they in fact did not do that and fully support the f1 academy (pretty much all of the teams sponsor an academy driver), and mercedes definitely didnt do it (the merc instagram posted a photo after all the statements had been made of george drinking a cup of tea which was hilarious)

-the fia dropped the investigation about two days later when it was clear that no now actually had any issue with toto and susie and it seemed to be some misogynistic bs from the fia.

-and low and behold, susie, just like she said she would, took legal action against the fia finally last week.

-she posted on social media the following:

“I can confirm that I have personally filed a criminal complaint in the French courts on the 4 March in relation to the statements made about me by the FIA last December,” she wrote. “There has still not been any transparency or accountability in relation to the conduct of the FIA and its personnel in this matter. “I feel more than ever it is important to stand up, call out improper behaviour and make sure people are held to account. Whilst some may think silence absolves them from responsibility – it does not.”

-sir lewis hamilton, a god and a legend, has always been very supportive of susie and her endeavors, especially with f1 academy (and the merc f1 academy driver dorian pin), was quick to repost it with his own support, saying that "its still a male dominated sport. and we are living in a time where the message is "if you file a complaint you will be fired" and that is a terrible narrative to be projecting into the world, especially when we're talking about inclusivity"

and finally, before we get to the really fun stuff, the fia president, mohammed ben sulayem, was cleared of wrongdoings and any allegations against him, but in true fia fashion, they didnt reveal their process of clearing him or any of the complaints against him

sir lewis hamilton did say something utterly hilarious about the whole ordeal though. and that was this:

and would you believe it, were not even anywhere near the damn race weekend yet.

because during the off week there was a whole shit load of unhinged pr and driver posts. i dont know if its the big time change or the fact that its summer in australia and everyones seasonal depression disappeared but everyone seemingly had the time of their lives.

red bull as we know is falling to pieces. and it is up to the pr team to make them stay at least a little bit relevant. so they decided to make the drivers do the water cup challenge

you know, that ages old trend where you try to fill up a cup of water without it overflowing?

and i would explain what happened, but its probably better for you to just watch it:

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Oracle Red Bull Racing (@redbullracing)

charles leclerc went surfing. and as we already know he cannot do sports besides f1 to save his life. some fans saw him and took some pictures of him attempting to surf:

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by F1RIENDS (@f1riendsmx)

charles then shit on this in his own instagram post:

later on in the weekend, charles also tried to play cricket, but ended up hitting a camera:

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Scuderia Ferrari (@scuderiaferrari)

pierre gasley also became the co owner of a semi professional french football club called fc versailles. likely because he realized that alpine is going nowhere fast and he needed an alternative source of income.

alpine is also rumored to be going up for sale (as in, some of the people funding the team reportedly may not want to fund them anymore. can't find the source for that but i know i read it somewhere this week)

and then we have lando.

where do we start with lando.

well.

he chose violence from the second he touched down in melbourne:

now why did the girlies lose their shit over this? well.

lando's current teammate, oscar, is australian. his previous teammate, daniel, is also australian. (worth pointing out that daniel's racing nickname is also the honey badger)

and daniel and oscar (perhaps?) responded (to lando's instagram story?) a day later when they each posted this on their stories:

but that was of course not where lando stopped. and if ive said it once, ill say it again, you gotta respect a guy who likes to stir the pot. and stir the pot he did.

now lando never dresses seasonally appropriate. this is a guy who wore a sweatshirt and long pants in miami when everyone else was wearing t shirts and shorts. and he decided to finally break out the shorts and tanks tops for australia. and. run everywhere.

now, for those who remember it, this gave kind of the same energy as when daniel howell made that esports documentary and there was all that weird footage of him just walking around in it. there were so many of these photos circulating but for some reason the only one i can find right now is this one:

he also revived his jpg and mov instagram accounts

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by @lando.jpg

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by @land0.mov

and then, as if that wasn't enough, he went on chicken shop date:

the girlies sufficiently lost their minds.

and then, right before the race, he finally shaved his little goatee thing. (not to be biased on my own post, but it was time for it to go)

also, leading into the race weekend, people pointed out that oscar piastri's voice was the australia tram announcement (i can't find the video but trust me it exists)

and then there was the australian race ads. which featured the three australian drivers.

three? you might be thinking. aren't there only two?

well, yeah technically. theres daniel and oscar and then for some reason the entire country of australia decided to make valtteri bottas an honorary australian.

and now, onto the race weekend itself:

first we need to talk about stake

specifically valtteri, who took the honorary australian title to heart and ran with it in whatever the absolute hell this ad he did with uber carshare was:

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Valtteri Bottas (@valtteribottas)

and then his teammate, zhou guanyu, furthered the bit by dressing up in a valtteri wig and putting a picture of valtteri on his special edition australia helmet:

there was also a sinkhole or a hole of sorts outside of the alpine hospitality, perhaps a bad omen for the weekend.

and as i said way back up at the top, every turn in this race weekend was a left. the first of which was about to happen in practice 1.

now i didnt actually watch this practice session because i had work but i know more or less what happened and that was that alex albon crashed.

it was a pretty big shunt with the wall (lando very helpfully said on the radio that there was "muchos debris" (lando does Not speak spanish hes just friends with carlos)) and while alex was okay, his car was not.

the session was red flagged (and we got a lovely shot of charles leclerc's eyes, as per is customary) (i was told i have to include the photo Or Else so here:)

now as we know, williams have had problems getting parts this year. aparently their methods are really out dated (aparently its all run on a microsoft excel sheet and they tried to blame microsoft itself for being the season why they didnt have any spare parts) and it is something that new team principal james vowels is trying to work on, but it is still a work in progress.

in any case, they needed a new chassis to repair alex's car. and they did not have one.

so what did they decide to do?

well. they figured that between their two drivers, alex and logan, alex had a better shot at getting points. (which williams have none of yet this year) so williams decided to have alex drive logan's car, sidelining logan for the race.

this was a bonkers decision for many reasons.

logan didnt actually do anything to deserve to get side lined, he actually finished practice sessions 1 and 2 in 13th and 14th place, equalling his best ever practice sessions

alex was the one that crashed, why were they punishing his teammate?

why re sign logan at all if williams aren't confident that he can perform when he needs to and score them points???

now i dont think that we have talked a whole lot about logan sargeant. hes a 24 year old from fort lauderdale, florida (only american on the grid baby!!!) and this is his second season. by all accounts he had a disappointing first season last year. his highest ever finish was 10th at the 2023 austin grand prix. he only got 10th because charles and lewis got disqualified, bumping him up two places. this is the only time last year he finished in the points.

i think he only made it to q3 of qualifying one time and it was at the las vegas gp, which the car was incredibly well suited for (but dont quote me on this).

prior to being in formula 1, he finished 4th in the f2 2022 championship. which is very good. for context, in the 2018 f2 championship george russell finished 1st, lando norris finished 2nd and then alex albon finished 3rd. in 2020 yuki tsunoda finished the f2 championship in third. and in 2022, when logan sargeant finished in 4th, liam lawson finished in third. in fact, logan was the only f2 driver from the 2022 year to secure an f1 contract for 2023.

reportedly, the reason why logan did not do well last year is because he has cripplingly show self confidence. and this was not helped by the fact that he was not performing well. he was the only driver to retire due to illness during the brutal 2023 qatar gp (high temperatures, drivers vomited in their helmets, drove with no hands, asked to have water dumped on them, couldn't get out of their own cars at then end, etc, bad times over all) (logan wasnt feeling well in the first place, but still).

logan barely got re signed to williams for 2024, they announced his contract extension in december after the season had already ended. and over the winter break he aparently trained his ass off because he felt as though he was not as fit as other drivers and he is well aware of the fact that he really has to prove himself this season to stay at williams, or at least to get a seat somewhere else on the grid.

and having your team kick you out of the car because they think that your teammate has the better shot at winning points is not the kind of message that you want to be sending to other teams.

the announcers (jolyon palmer and someone else who i can't remember) had a lot to say about this during the third practice session on friday.

they were mainly surprised at the decision because alex albon only did 11 laps during practice 1 before he crashed, logan had done two full sessions and done well. they went as far as to say "how humiliating for logan. williams thinks he can't score a point. alex did 11 laps yesterday and they think that he has a better chance of scoring a point"

now, alex has scored way more points than logan, especially last year. alex scored 22 points and logan scored 1. but this year neither of them have scored any points.

if we look at the williams stats from the last 2 races:

in bahrain, alex albon finished 15 and logan finished 20. both cars had severe technical problems and logan was on track to finish well before he spun out because of a mechanical issue and ended up 2 laps behind everyone else. several buttons on alex's steering wheel stopped working at one point.

in saudi arabia, alex albon finished 11 and logan finished 15. both cars still had technical problems and they were also being held up by kevin magnussen.

so, the two drivers should be on a relatively equal playing field here, but they are clearly not.

the announcers (and everyone else) were mainly confused as to why williams retained logan for this year if they didnt trust him to score a point (as that is how f1 works) and he clearly "hasn't got the backing of anyone" at williams.

but it gets worse for logan.

aparently, theres a clause in his contract that says that it was possible that he would get pulled out of his car for alex to race it instead because the team knew that they were short on parts. which again begs the question: “why did they retain sargent if they put it in his contract that if your teammate bins it were going to give you his car” 

williams came into this weekend knowing that this was a possibility because they had no space chassis because their spare car hadn't been built yet (this happened to a team before, haas, back in 2021 when their drivers destroyed so many cars that they didnt have any spare parts and then the following year their spare car got stuck in customs so they couldn't use it). and they ad to use one of their two curfews (each team is only allowed to break curfew twice during the season for car repairs) to rebuild the car around alex.

and as jolyon said: “he’s unlikely to score. the last thing he did was crash a car. he knows his teammate cannot score. he cannot crash another car. if he has another crash he will look really stupid.” 

alex albon finished practice 3 in p13. fans the whole weekend were outraged on behalf of logan.

the official press statements from williams were also very somber sounding:

the team said this:

following alex albans accident during fp1 at the Australian grand prix, williams racing confirms that due to the extensive damage sustained, it is forced to withdraw the chassis for the remainder of the grand prix. this chassis will be returned to the tram's hq at grove for repair. due to the fact that a third chassis is unavailable, the tram can confirm it has taken the decision for alex to complete the reaimeder of the weekend in the chassis that logan sargeant drove in fp1 and fp2

james vowel's statement was very long but he basically said:

while logan should not have to suffer from a mistake that he did not make, every race counts when the mid field is tighter than ever, so we have made the call based on our best potential to score points this weekend.

alex albon sounded displeased about the whole ordeal:

i have to be totally honest and say that no driver would want to give up his seat. i would never want anything like this to happen. logan has always been a consummate professional and a team player from say one, and this wont be an easy one for him to take. at this point though, i cannot dwell on the situation and my only job now is to maximize our potential this weekend and work with the whole team to make sure we do the best job possible.

(alex has also been a victim of the red bull second seat bs and had his own seat yanked from under him so he knows how this feels)

and logan said

this is the hardest moment i can remember in my career and its absolutely not easy. i am however completely here for the team and will continue to contribute in ay way that i can this weekend to maximize what we can do

also, the day that alex got into logans car for practice 3 and qualifying? it was alex's birthday.

they asked max verstappen his thoughts on the logan having to give up his car thing and he said "i understand it from the performance aspect, of course, but that doesnt change the fact that this obviously sucks for logan. if that were to happen to me, i would completely flatten my car, so no one can drive."

tldr: its not looking good for logan sargeant to keep a contract if three races in theyre not confident that he can score the team points and yank him out of his seat for his teammate to have a chance to drive when he has already crashed during the weekend.

aside from that, practice three was decently uneventful. mercedes are still struggling and according to one alex brundle (commentator) they even looked "grumpy" and red bull were not dominating as much as they usually should have.

there were also a fair amount of unhinged radios: (via the instagram acc f1feverr)

moving into qualifying. all eyes were on red bull, mclaren and ferrari, who all seemed to be the most competitive for the weekend.

and back in the ferrari was one carlos sainz jr who was, in the words of crofty, “minus an appendix and full of determination."

thats right, carlos sainz was racing again following his emergency appendix surgery in saudi arabia 2 weeks before. after his trip to the paddock for the saudi race (which was against doctors suggestions but aparently he woke up and immediately was like i want to go to the track and just sort of argued with everyone until they let him go) he aparently spent 10 days in bed and did absolutely no training for the australian grand prix. no running, no sim work, no neck training no nothing. he himself said that he was better, but definitely not in peak physical condition and definitely not 100%. they had to out extra padding around his seat belts so that it wouldn't totally kill him.

not too many insane things happened during qualifying, but there was the following:

-crofty said that "honorary australian bottas, who has been spreading his mullet happiness and has been adopted by australia"

-daniel ricciardo went 10th fastest during q1 only to have his lap time deleted due to track limits and put him back in the bottom 5 and out in q1

-esetban ocon managed to make it out of q1. in an alpine. he screamed very loudly over the radio when this was told to him

-martin brundle very disturbingly said that “when i was little i was told that they use the appendix for the bits in marmalade” and theres a lot to unpack there but i think we should just throw away the whole suitcase

-yuki tsunoda made it through to q3

-alex albon got out in q2

-sir lewis hamilton got knocked out in q2 by none other than lance stroll, and it was the first time since 2007 that he wasnt out in q2 at the australian gp

-in q3 charles leclerc had some technical problems with his car and ended up aborting his last flying lap, landing him in p5

-max verstappen became the first driver to crack 250 mph at albert park

-the top 6 were max, carlos, checo, lando, charles and then oscar

-however, checo was given a three place grid penalty for impeding nice hulkenberg, so the starting order ended up being max, carlos, lando, charles, oscar, checo

onto the race itself

hang onto your hats folks this is where shit gets insane

(lando did in fact have to hold onto his hat and also shove past several people to make it to the national anthem on time, which was hilarious)

and for the first time in many years, there was no crash in the first corner !!! no, the bonkers stuff came a bit later on lap 2

staring on lap 2 the cars can use DRS (which is where they open up the back wing to get an extra 20kph of speed as long as they are within 1 second of the car in front of them) and carlos was running very close to max, so he opened up the DRS and BOOM BAM KAZAM CARLOS SAINZ PASSED MAX VERSTAPPEN AND TOOK THE LEAD OF THE RACE

i am not at all exaggerating when i say that it felt like everyone freaked out at the same time. i was watching the race with my roommate and i could still feel the sheer insanity of the whole world

but that was not all

max said over the radio "i just lost the car, really weird" which is what made carlos be able to pass him.

(kind of irrelevant but martin brundle said around here about carlos "you do not look 100% young man" and it was just too good to leave out)

max was still holding onto p2, sandwiched between carlos and lando, until lap 4 when he first said "fuck the car is loose" followed by "i have fire. fire fire by brake" after smoking horrendously.

and i Guarantee you everyones thoughts while watching this were "max is smoking. holy shit max is really smoking. wait iS HE GOING TO DNF???"

spoiler, he did.

max verstappen dnf'd the 2024 australian gp

incidentally, the last time that he dnf'd was at the australian gp in 2022.

later on, max revealed that it was a mechanical problem with the brakes. one of his brakes got stuck on and overheated.

meanwhile, carlos was still going strong out in front. leading and controlling the race. not as much as max would have, but still enough. and so everyone who didnt want up in the middle of the night to watch the race was very very upset (hehe, i stayed up and i had a fucking blast, seriously the last night that i felt the insane during was the night of the destielputinelection)

meanwhile, the only thought in my head was that i wasnt going to have to hear the dutch national anthem

to positively no one's surprise, valtteri bottas had yet another bad pit stop, with stake blaming the wheel nuts as the primary issue.

all was fine and dandy until lap 16 when another tragedy struck

sir lewis hamilton's engine failed

which was nothing short of absolutely tragic. so with lewis out and a yellow flag with a virtual safety car to neutralize the race a bit, the boys continued

nico hulkenberg and alex albon fought for awhile for p10 (and points) until alex had to pit, firmly placing the williams car out of the points. which was disappointing considering the fact that alex was put in specifically to get points.

on lap 29, lando and oscar, who were running 4th and 3rd, were told to swap positions and lando pulled out in front of oscar to try and catch charles leclerc, who was in 2nd. the reason for this was because lando had fresher, faster tires and had been placed on a better strategy since he had qualified higher than oscar. notably though, an australian has never been on the podium at their home gp, so in the words of martin brundle: “that went down like a cold flat white with the crowd” 

then the shitty stake pitstops continued as zhou had a 19 second stop (darn wheel nuts)

pierre got a 5 second time penalty for cutting the pit lane exit (which he also did during qualifying)

on lap 50, perez, who had been flying up the pack like a rocket ship, suspiciously had no more pace in his car. later it was revealed that this was because one of fernando's helmet visor tear offs got stuck in his car.

and then, on the very last lap, george russell basically got brake checked by fernando alonso (who was having a problem with his car) and skidded across the gravel into the wall before landing in the middle of the track. over the radio he begged for a red flag (because he was in the middle of the track) but race control only gave him a yellow flag with a virtual safety car. likely because it was the last lap and george had been in the middle of the pack, meaning only half the grid had to pass him again before doing the cool down lap. if they had called a red flag (which they should have) people would have still had to pass george to get back to the pits.

and with that, the australian gp ended with carlos in p1, charles in p2, lando in p3, yuki and both haas drivers in the points and three dnfs.

insane.

even more insane when you remember that every time carlos has won a race, george russell has dnf'd.

and!! this is not the first but the second time that carlos has managed to break max's 10 win streak. the last time he did this was in singapore 2023, the iconic race where he kept lando in his drs behind him to help fend off the mercedes cars that had brand new tires and george russell ended up crashing on the last lap of that race as well.

reguardless. carlos won. fresh out of appendix surgery. with no contract for next year. this is now the second time that the "wrong driver" (not charles) has won a race for ferrari in the last year.

despite this, carlos asked over the radio if charles could pull up next to him on the cool down lap so that they could "celebrate this one together"

the post race interviews were hosted by gunther steiner, the disgraced haas team principal. carlos joked in his interview that “i would recommend all the drivers have their appendix out." charles only understood about half of what gunther was saying and the other half of the time he just blinked in confusion. lando said that he thought that he could have beaten charles if he had pitted at a different time.

and thankfully, we did not have to hear the dutch national anthem at the podium. truly the biggest win this weekend.

the broadcast cut off lando's champagne pop tho, thankfully we have mclarens ig account:

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by McLaren (@mclaren)

it was also so terribly refreshing to see a ferrari driver with life and happiness in his eyes. carlos must have said the same stupid appendix joke in every interview he did and he thought that it was equally funny every time:

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Lando Norris Fan (@f1_landonorris_4)

carlos and lando (though it was clearly mostly lando) also made this train wreck of an instagram post celebrating their podium together (for those of you who dont know, carlos and lando were teammates at mclaren back in 2019-20 and had such a ridiculous bromance going on. they are still friends (their hug after this race was adorable) and when asked about sharing the podium with carlos after the race, lando said that it was "quite romantic")

the weight loss hashtag was particularly insane of them (appendixes only weigh between 1 and 18 grams)

and, taking us into the silly season discussions was the podium post race interview:

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by 𝐂𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐨𝐬 𝐒𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐳 & 𝐋𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐨 𝐍𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐬 𝐟𝐚𝐧𝐩𝐚𝐠𝐞❤️‍🔥 (@carlandocontent)

-in his post race interviews, carlos said “i’m still jobless for next year so hopefully this will help”

-previously it had been rumored that carlos might go to stake because its going to turn into audi in 2026 and they are interested in him, but after the performance that carlos put on at the race, he probably wont go there if they can't even change tires properly.

-chrsitian horner, on the other hand, confirmed that carlos is on the short list of people for the red bull 2025 seat, something that was previously not an option at all.

-and then, unfortunately, daniel ricciardo has been given an ultimatum

-aparently if he does not step up his performance by the miami race (3 races from now) he will be getting replaced by liam lawson, according to helmut marko.

-this is both hilarious and also upsetting. hilarious because he was the one who replaced nyck last year, upsetting because they gave nyck almost half a season but theyre giving daniel barely a handful of races. also yuki only just scored the teams first points this weekend

-its kind of implied that if daniel looses his seat now, hes not coming back.

-daniel was interviewed post race and seemed just about as upset as he usually does these days (no life in his eyes) and said that before the race, horner came up to him and said that "he wished me luck and told me to keep my head up” so we will see what happens. had daniel's lap time not been deleted during qualifying, he likely would have gotten points this weekend.

and a quick speed run of other chaotic stuff that happened this weekend that didnt quite fit anywhere else on this post:

-oscars grandma made the mclaren team cookies

-fred vasseur the ferrari team principal signed the back of lams lawson's shirt

-alex albon smashed cake in a fans face

-pierre and estaban traded a selfie for some tim tams

-nico colored in kevin's beard with sharpie on one of his giant head cut outs

-valtteri bottas did scooter tricks

-everyone got quizzed on aussie slang as usual and very few people knew any of it

-all the teams posted a photo that was upside down to announce they were in australia

-lando said that his plan for the race was "not a jump start"

-they had valtteri rate people's mullets

-yuki got compared to a koala

-charles was asked to speak french and then he started speaking spanish

-logan was asked his thoughts on the Tasmanian state election and he said "i dont even know what's going on"

-someone shouted at lando when was he going to win a race and he flipped them off

-lando pulled his chair up closer to charles and carlos in the cool down room to get a better view

-they cut to lewis looking like a proud dad watching the race after his dnf

-toto wolff said that he wanted to punch himself in the face following the double merc dnf and hes now doubting that hes a good team principal

-jack doohan and nico hulkenberg had a whole conversation about nicos hair and what hair gel he uses after the race

-EDIT FROM THE FOLLOWING MORNING CAUSE I FORGOT THINGS:

-fernando alonso got a 20 second time penalty for nearly killing george russell

-max verstappens girlfriends kid (penelope) was at the race and it was her fist time going to one (i think she’s like 5 i have no idea) so we got to see max being a girl dad

-ryan air posted asking logan sargeant if he wanted a ticket home

-sebastian vettel is being rumored to be preparing for the 24 hours of le mans, he’s in the process of doing testing

and well in the words of nico hulkenberg "interesting race"

i think that just about does it

hopefully the next update is shorter

see you all in 2 weeks for the japanese gp!

Sorry i tried to scroll past but, i know nothing about f1 other than max verstappen is fast, my dad doesnt like lewis hamilton, fast car goes in a loop and sometimes expodes. Could you give me a crash course in f1 drama? Im very intrigued. Whats the tea as it were?

a terribly loaded question, but i will do my best. i’ve talked about some of the drama before like the red bull second seat and the chronicles of haas but allow me to briefly try my hand at explaining the nightmare that is the upcoming silly season

under the cut we go

silly season is when the drivers go through contract renewals, extensions and switches. usually it’s confined to the first half of the season (march-july) but it has been known to extend all the way to the last race of the season and they like to switch people around at random sometimes. driver contracts are complex, there’s a lot of money involved and basically You Are The Face Of The Team so if you have a shit season then you make the team look bad. but at the same time you could have a shit season because you have a shit car. it’s sticky stuff.

so. there are only twenty seats in formula 1. 10 teams. each team gets two drivers. (there’s also reserve drivers but we’re not going to get into that). who ends up with a contract is largely up to the teams, they can pull the contract out from under people they can also cut you mid season. they’ve done it before.

of the 20 drivers on the grid, 14 of them have contracts expiring at the end of the year. yes. 14. you see how this could get complicated.

so let’s meet the teams.

red bull racing. they came first this year (and last year) in the championship. like aggressively first. like they won the championship by over 350 points. they are definitely the team to beat. but if you end up with a seat at red bull, you do have to deal with max verstappen being your teammate and he won all but three of the races last year. he’s the golden boy. red bull are also notoriously silly when it comes to contracts and famously swap people mid season who aren’t performing.

mercedes. merc is home to 7 time world champion lewis hamilton and they have won the championship a great many times, though not since 2021. they are kind of in their flop arc and their car the last 2 years has been pretty garbage, but they have still made it work because they were able to come in second last year.

ferrari. god help the poor little meow meows with a ferrari contract. ferrari is a notoriously great team and they’re trying to get back to the top again but their strategy every single time has fallen short. to the point where their drivers are the ones doing the strategy in their cars while driving. they came in third last year and have been decently consistent at getting first in qualifying and then getting beat by max verstappen on race day.

mclaren. they’ve definitely worked their way up over recent years. they ended fourth last year and have had some championship wins before but not nearly as many as say merc and ferrari. their team ceo (owner? director?) is a little interesting and their car started out a pile of flaming hot garbage at the beginning of the year but they did manage to get their shit together.

aston martin. they are owned by canadian billionaire lawrence stroll, father of lance stroll (one of the drivers for the team). they’ve undergone several name changes over the recent years (force india, racing point, etc). they positively slayed at the start of the season and then one day they sucked. they finished fifth in the championship.

alpine. the frenchest french team. they’re (i think?) still partially owned by the french government. both of their drivers are french. (their drivers also hate eachother but we’ll get to that. just know they’re in the middle of a modern french civil war). they had the opportunity to have a good rookie driver (oscar piastri) this past year but in a thrilling twitter battle, he publically flamed the shit out of them and went to mclaren instead (and slayed). they're usually solidly middle of the pack. they ended sixth in the championship.

williams. williams has been one of the back of the grid teams for the last many years but they have finally started to get their shit together and don’t quite suck as much as they used to. all of the points this year were scored by only one driver though (except one but we’ll get there). they came in seventh.

alpha tauri. they are the sister team of red bull. so technically redbull owns both teams (meaning they can swap drivers between teams. they like doing this.) they’ve just kind of been There for awhile but they did slay towards the end of the season when one of their drivers led the race for several laps. basically tho, this team is the gateway to redbull. they came in eighth.

alpha romeo. recently renamed to stake f1 team (but sometimes they are going to be called kick sauber. this is a whole other drama post and i’m not getting into it). they’re also just kind of there. generally unproblematic. seems that really great drivers who get ixed out of a contract for a younger driver end up here or young drivers who are in their early years are here before they go to a better team. they ended ninth this year.

haas. oh haas. goofy team. they suck. point blank they suck. they keep loosing sponsors because they suck, they don’t win ever (one time they came first in qualifying last year). they cursed themselves in australia in 2018 by not tightening their tires and its been downhill ever since. they came 10th. their team principle got let go (fired?) who’s to say today.

so those are the teams. it is important to note that:

-there is a cost cap. each team is allowed to spend no more than 135m per year.

-not all cars are equal. some things are standard. they all undergo the same testing. but the cars are all very different. so you can be a good driver but stuck in a shitty car. which makes it impressive if you are doing well in a shitty car.

let’s meet our drivers!!!

starting with the guys who’s contract is not ending in 2024:

max verstappen. 3 time world champion. 26 years old. general beast on the track. he dominated the whole season. he’s currently racing for red bull and has a contract with them through 2028.

lewis hamilton. 7 time world champion. 39 years old. he drives for mercedes. he will not leave mercedes until he retires. he really really wants to win an 8th world championship and is willing to stick it out a few more years as long as merc still believes in him. his contract expires in 2025.

george russell. the other merc driver. 26 years old. hes aggressively british and says thinks like blimey unironically. walking meme. got his merc seat in 2022 right when they entered their flop arc by getting his tractor of a williams to finish second in qualifying in the middle of a rainstorm. his contract expires in 2025.

lando norris. mclaren driver. 24 years old. he has notably never won a race in his five years of formula one (mostly because right when his car finally was good enough max verstappen was 20 seconds ahead of anyone) but he is regarded as Very Good. he has only ever driven for mclaren. and even though there is another year left on his contract there is mass speculation that he will not renew his contract with mclaren after it expires and he may move up to one of the top teams (red bull, merc, ferrari) (tho i think he doesnt hate himself quite enough to go to ferrari). his contract expires in 2025.

oscar piastri. the other mclaren driver. 22 years old. this was his rookie season and he positively slayed. like people compared his rookie season to lewis hamiltons rookie season. he also had the positively funniest start to his rookie year because alpine announced that he would be driving for them (he had been their reserve driver and in the alpine academy) and he posted a tweet that basically said yeah thats false i never singed anything with you and im going to race with mclaren instead (he dodged a bullet) and then alpine tried and failed to sue him for $4m USD. he signed a contract extension with mclaren this year and his contract expires in 2026.

lance stroll. aston martin driver and son of the aston martin owner. hes doing ok, tho there was conspiracy that he wanted to quit and have a tennis career awhile ago. but basically since his dad owns the team it seems that hes guaranteed a seat for as long as he wants one.

so now. moving onto the good shit. the people who have contracts expiring in 2024. hold onto your hats people.

charles leclerc. (everyones favorite slutty little soup can). 26 years old. he is currently at ferrari and he has been since 2019. notably, he was given the longest contract in the history of ferrari after a stellar rookie season at sauber (renamed to alpha romeo, renamed to stake f1) where he got the tractor of a car consistently into the points. having the longest contract in the history of ferrari was a flex at the time, but now its likely how he will introduce himself at therapy sessions. ferrari have fucked this man left right and center up the ass with a plastic lunchroom spork. hes talented, he can drive, and he can drive well. but the strategy that ferrari has absolutely sucks. either something is wrong with the car (see him blowing out his gear box on the formation lap in monaco, his car completely crapping out and spinning into the barrier in brazil before the race even started) or they fuck up his pit stops or put him on the wrong tires and honestly its just frustrating. but will he leave??? likely not. you'd have to pry ferrari out of his cold dead hands and at this rate that might be where this is headed though there has been some minor speculation of him going to another team like merc or red bull, but merc doesnt have any open seats and red bull is a whole other dumpster fire of drama. ferrari are going to have to pay him a boatload of money to make him stay.

carlos sainz. the smooth operator. 29 years old. ferrari driver. previously carlos was at toro rosso (renamed to alpha tauri), renault (renamed to alpine), and mclaren before signing with ferrari. he has been at ferrari since 2021 and has voiced that he would like to stay with them for however long he can. there is speculation that lando might replace him at ferrari (but landos contract is not up until 2025) and there is also some speculation that alex albon might replace him. while charles is clearly the golden boy at ferrari, carlos is slightly slower but also definitely consistent. he was THE ONLY non red bull driver to win a race this past year, in Singapore after max verstappedn was knocked out of qualifying by alpha tauri reserve driver liam lawson (more on him later) and because he basically came up with his own strategy in the car while he was driving.

sergio perez. aka checo. red bull driver. 33 years old. and oh boy here's where we open the can of worms. checo was previously at racing point (renamed aston martin) and it was very near the end of the 2020 (?) season and he was out of a contract. he had a bonkers race where he was knocked to the back of the grid and then overtook everyone and somehow ended up winning (there is more to that story but just trust me) and christian horner, red bull team principle, mr ginger spice and definite disney villain called him and said congrats sir you have a seat at red bull! well. fast forward. hes been causing problems. problems as in crashing a lot, generally not doing great and pissing the crap out of red bull. it is basically guaranteed at this point that he will not be getting a contract extension. there was actually talk this year of him losing his seat mid season to one of the alpha tauri drivers, because remember, red bull owns both teams and they can switch them whenever they want to (and they have!) but ultimately this did not happen. even though checo has a seat at red bull until the end of 2024, its mass speculated that he is going to get switched with an alpha tauri driver, probably daniel ricciardo (more on him shortly) mid season because there is a speculated clause in daniels contract that says that if checo isn't performing well in the first few races daniel is getting his seat.

daniel ricciardo. 34 years old. alpha tauri driver. man oh man what a guy. outside of being the prankster of the paddock, he has one of the most batshit careers of anyone currently on the grid. he started out at red bull and was showing real talent and skill and was on track to win things (and was!) and was there until the end of 2018 when max verstappen (his teammate) started getting preferential treatment and also red bull started having a lot of problems with their engines (which were being outsourced from Renault (now alpine) and another team on the grid) and well very very long story short he made the surprise move of the century and decided to sign with Renault (which makes no sense they're the one with the engine problems) and was there for 2 years before moving again to mclaren where he was reportedly not treated very well and had a hard time driving the car so they mutually ended his contract with them early and he basically retired at the end of the 2022 season and became a red bull reserve driver. then halfway through the 2023 season alpha tauri ixed one of their drivers, nyck de vries, because he wasnt doing well and promoted daniel back up to a full time driver at alpha tauri (which we know is only a step down from red bull) but then he broke his hand in a crash in zanvort (?) and then he was replaced for a few races by formula 2 driver liam lawson (who we will also talk about) and then he came back to finish out the season in alpha tauri after he was cleared. daniel has admitted openly that he never should have left red bull and he was given bad advice to do so. hes towards the end of his career at this point and its well known that he Really Really wants to finish out his career at red bull again. he and max have already been teammates before and they do work well together and daniel is great driver (see his comeback in texas (or maybe it was brazil?) this year). so. Pretty Sure that daniels going to get either an extension at alpha tauri or go up to red bull. thats what we all want. get this man in a red bull we need him there biblically.

liam lawson. now technically liam is not actually a formula 1 driver. hes a formula 2 driver, but he was daniels replacement for five races and there has been some speculation and some confirmed news about him so hes getting included. when he was racing for f1 he was at alpha tauri. hes 21 and looks like he belongs in the movie grease. no one was expecting him to slay in formula 1 and he positively knocked everyones socks off. the scene: Singapore. which, if you'll recall, is the one race that a not red bull driver won. this was largely because liam lawson slayed the absolute game in qualifying. the qualifying part of racing determines what order the cars start in on the grid for the race and theres three parts, the first two parts the bottom 5 drivers each time get knocked out and then the top 10 complete for the last 10 spots. liam lawson knocked BOTH max verstappen and checo perez out of qualifying in the second round by going very slightly faster than them, effectively fucking up red bulls race and allowing carlos to win. and he also scored points in that race, which no one was expecting. now thats all fine and dandy, but here's the speculation: hemlut marko (im pretty sure) (who is somehow decently involved in the decision making at red bull though i couldn't tell you how) said that he thinks that liam lawson will be in an f1 seat no later than 2025. meaning that he will probably get offered a contract this year. and hes already raced for alpha tauri. red bull have sunk a good amount of money into him. they clearly want him. so if he gets offered an alpha tauri seat in 2025, that means theres a good chance danny rics is going to red bull. do you SEE how the plot here is THICKENED

yuki tsunoda. age 23. currently at alpha tauri. and fun fact, the only alpha tauri driver to race there the whole year. he had three separate team mates. he is slaying and hes often slept on. he has a bit of a temper and likes to shout on the radio and also hates working out (they had to force him to move to italy or something to work out, long story) but hes been kinda killing it. he led several laps in the abu dhabi race this year and hes decently consistent. people think theres possibility that he could get moved up to red bull on account of the fact that he is younger than daniel and clearly has more years in him,, but there is also possibility that he might not because red bull like to make stupid decisions. and if he doesnt get moved up to rebel, will he stay with alpha tauri? we don't know.

alex albon. age 27. currently a williams driver. alex albon is another one with a batshit career. he started out his rookie year in 2019 at alpha tauri then got moved up to red bull halfway through the year when red bull decided that pierre gasley wasnt doing a good enough job (more on him later) and stayed with red bull for a solid year and a half until he lost his seat in 2021 to checo. he has been with williams for the last two years and is basically carrying the team. like. williams as a team scored 28 points this year. and alex albon scored 27 of those 28 points. and as we know, williams is still kind of in their shit arc (though they are doing much better. they didnt score any points for a solid 2 (?) years. so this is an improvement.) and if you can get a shit car to perform you catch the eye of bigger teams. now, alex has already been a red bull driver. and he was on the cusp of podiuming two separate times when lewis hamilton ran into him. this (among a few other things) basically killed his chances at getting resigned at red bull because he wasnt ""performing"" and red bull are bitches who love to win. but some people think that red bull should give him another shot. like daniel, hes already been max's teammate and he can definitely drive. but theres also talk he might go to ferrari because ferrari think that he might compliment charles's driving style (or something). but going to ferrari at this point is kind of suicide. so.

logan sergeant. age 23. the only american on the grid. the other williams driver. he just finished his rookie year. he scored a grand total of one single point this season, in texas, and it was because charles leclerc and lewis hamilton both got disqualified because the floor of their car had more wear (by literally less than millimeters) than it was allowed to, bumping him up from 12th to 10th. he has never done better than alex albon. he was also the very last driver to get a contract for 2024, with williams waiting until i think december of 2023 to announce his contract extension. clearly, hes on thin ice. but people have also said that he needs time to get used to formula 1 (other people have pointed out that oscar piastri slayed his rookie season this year and this statement about needing time is largely false). where logan ends up next year though will largely depend on how well the 2024 season goes for him.

fernando alonso. 42 years old. many people like to point out that oscar piastri is actually younger than fernando's racing career. he won tiktok creator of the year (somehow) and is also a 2 time world champion. he retired a few years ago, just to show back up again and slay. during the first half of the season when aston martin had a zoom zoom car he killed it, and then they had problems on top of problems and he didnt do well. except for that one race in brazil where he came in third, beating checo by literally .05 seconds. he hasn't really made any hints about retiring a second time and he is kind of carrying aston Martin right now (he scored 205 points this season, coming in 4th and tying in points with charles leclerc, lance stroll only scored 74 points this year.) and they did have their best year yet this year. (though they are relatively new).

pierre gasley. 27 years old. french. drives for alpine. the french team. previously he raced with toro rosso (now alpha tauri), then got promoted to a red bull driver in 2019, then halfway through the season they decided he wasnt doing a good enough job and he got demoted back down to alpha tauri. then he won a race with alpha tauri just to stick it to red bull. after the great oscar piastri contract twitter war, he was signed as alpines second driver, with Esteban ocon being the other driver (more on him soon). estie bestie and pierre (both french) were childhood friends and now hate each other for unknown reasons and basically feuded on the track for most of the season. french civil war at alpine. he scored 62 points in 2023 and came in 11th. not really sure where he will end up, it is possible that he will stick it out at alpine.

esteban ocon. 27 years old. also french. currently driving for alpine. another one with a silly bonkers career. he started out at force india and had a baller few seasons there but his teammate at the time was checo, and checo didnt really cooperate with him too much and caused some drama that cost estie bestie some places and some points. max verstappen also beat him up in the garage once. thats not really relevant but it did happen. anyway, after the owner of force india was arrested for .... i don't remember what maybe it was embezzlement or bankruptcy or something money related, the team was backed by lawrence stroll and became racing point. but all of that happened mid season and lawrence was basically like look ill back you guys for now but next year my son gets a seat (lance) so one of you two (checo and estie bestie) have to go. and ultimately they let estie bestie go even though he was more consistent because checo had more sponsors and they needed money. so he was out of formula 1 for a few years (but was a merc reserve driver) and then went to Renault, which then became alpine. he did come in 12th though overall this season, just behind pierre. so. will alpine keep both him and pierre and keep the civil war going? whos to say.

nico hulkenberg. 36 years old. haas driver. in his 200+ f1 races he has never been on the podium and he really really wants to be on the podium. unfortunately this will never happen in a haas because haas fucking sucks. and everyone knows it. he is getting towards the end of his career though. though! stake f1 will become the mario Andretti and audi team in 2026 (don't question it) and they have supposedly voiced interest in nico. so we will see if he hangs on that long to end up at audi. for now tough, hes definitely hating it at haas. though, haas are going to have a different team principle next year so maybe that will change things. i have a sneaky feeling through that haas will probably end up with another 2 rookie drivers because everyone else is smart enough to not race for them.

kevin magnussen. 31 years old. haas driver. hes another deeply interesting character. he has had one podium. in his rookie season. in his first race. and none since. kevin started at haas in 2017 and then left at then end of 2020 when he basically got kicked off because the team needed money and they wanted to bring in drivers with more sponsorships. these drivers were mick schumacher and nikita mazepin. so kevin basically was forced to retire after the 2020 season. this went decently well for haas. until russia invaded ukraine right before the start of the 2022 season and, well, nikita was Russian and it was never distinctly proven that his dads company (who was sponsoring the team) wasnt also funding the invasion. so nikita got fired and they were literally like 2 weeks out from the start of the season, down a driver. who are you gonna call? kevin magnussen! and hes been back ever since. but hes clearly getting annoyed with haas. there was one great clip from this year where his car caught on fire and he kind of just stared into to, clearly hoping it would burn for a long time. so the likelihood of him extending his contract is looking slim.

valtteri bottas. 34 years old. currently a driver for stake f1 (alpha romeo, kick sauber, whatever you wanna call it). previously, he was a mercedes driver and notoriously helped lewis hamilton win a great many championships, until he lost his seat to george russell in 2022. there was a rather awkward part of the 2021 season where valtteri knew that he was out of a merc seat the following year and kind of just chose violence. he slayed. then he went to alpha romeo, grew a mullet and made a calendar of his ass. quite the glow up if you ask me. hes also very interested in cycling. honestly though, i have my own personal speculation that hes going to retire at the end of this year.

zhou guanyu. 24 years old. driver for stake f1 (alpha romeo/kick sauber, etc etc). hes doing alright. he just finished his second season, in his first season he was majorly out qualified by valtteri but this past season he managed to out qualify him a good 6 times. which is decently good for the tractor of a car hes driving. its possible that he could get a contract extension, but like logan, its probably going to depend on how the 2024 season goes for him.

and thats all the drivers. theres also a few others i didnt talk about, like some other f2 drivers who want seats and mick schumacher, who is currently a merc reserve driver, all of which could be contenders for f1 seats. but one things for sure. this is going to be the silliest fucking silly season.

feel free to add on and peer review me

[rxttenfish]

What are those fish plotting. What nefarious deeds are they up to

complicated question. namely because to answer this i'd have to get into merkingdom politics and history and how exactly their whole embargo on ANY contact with the land formed and for what reason, alongside some REALLY shady stuff that they have done, that people within the merkingdom are very aware of, but of a kind of nature that even miranda has been banned from speaking on it to landfolk. or showing them either. she's kind of bad at both of these, but its fine, just don't look too closely at what she's doing and you won't know a thing.

speaking of miranda: there's the whole REASON she was sent up as an ambassador to make those very first introductions to the land and forge brand new political relationships, which is a complex mix of history, merkingdom politics, and inter-vanderbilt drama that they've covered up pretty hard and are absolutely trying to distract even their fellow royals from. miranda herself only knows a part of the story on that last part, which unfortunately is the least interesting part of the story. if you asked any of her sisters, they would know, but they aren't exactly telling, nor are they in a position where its feasible to ask them. where the present-day is in my writing - only miranda and bellanda are on land, amanda and laudanda are still fully within the merkingdom and tending to business there.

and of course there's the king, but you KNOW no one's getting close to him to ask him anything. the queen's been dead for over twenty years and her spirit is MIA, so she's no use either.

in as far as anyone on land knows: mostly the merkingdom just seems interested in forging new political relationships, getting off on the right foot and generally being eager to please with a heavy undercurrent of "they have the kind of power behind them that you REALLY don't want to fuck with". all anyone's seen of that power so far is glimpsed through trade relationships, which the merkingdom seems very intensely interested in odd, basically worthless things from the people they contact, with a lot of high-value items and resources in return, which they seem all too willing to give out like candy. the quality alone is cause for suspicion, least of all how readily they can provide all of these things, and for almost nothing in return.

still, they're polite, and dont really come off as wanting anything else, and are clearly fantastically rich, so although something's clearly going on, it's hard to make heads or tails of it so far.

as far as miranda's friends know: miranda is clearly afraid of going home. she acted completely differently when she came up to land as compared to how she acts now, and even now she still gets WEIRD in certain situations and topics in an alarming way, be it either switching into complete and utter panic (dolphins being one of the biggest triggers for this one) or entirely blanking out and going numb or switching into a sort of "princess mode", abruptly coming across as strict and business-like and entirely divorced from her prior personality, and there's a lot of little hints that something is wrong. she still fawns over daddy, don't get me wrong, but she goes further with it. practically falling over herself for him even when he's not present and almost overcompensating by talking him up. hell, the only person in her family she's willing to speak very genuinely about is bellanda, and asking about the others only ends badly.

trying to bring up any of this to miranda herself is a bust, ofc, because all you're going to do is to make her reactive and lash out at you for daring to question her and question the merkingdom, and how DARE you speak such LIES. around spring she gets especially despondent and vanishes for days and weeks at a time, though she's obscure with the reasons why. she still vanishes for sometimes weeks during other times of the year, with absolutely no answers as to what she was doing, but it always happens a lot in spring.

and there's the business of what miranda's royal duties are specifically, but again, she's not talking about any of this and you can't make her.

the merkingdom is, likewise, not taking questions at this time.

[n1kolaiz]

"You want to know what death is? I'll tell you. Death is the loss of life. Despite everything doctors like me attempt... a patient's life can still fall through our fingers. You think death lies in the apex of science? Anyone with such little regard for life will die by my hand."

Character Analysis: Yosano Akiko

Age: 25 || Ability: Thou Shalt Not Die

BSD CHAPTER CHAPTER 65-66 SPOILERS

table of contents:

1. Author counterpart.

2. Yosano's history.

3. 'Angel of Death' defined.

4. Yosano and Atsushi.

YOSANO BRAINROT!*(#&!*@#($

1. Author counterpart.

Having been given the “Sho Ho” at birth, Yosano Akiko’s counterpart—the real-life author—was known for her zealous take on both feminism and pacifism.

Side note: Once again, to avoid confusion, I will use the name Sho Ho in reference to the real-life author, and Yosano in reference to the BSD character.

Sho Ho's writings were pretty much out-of-the-ordinary in her time, and despite being suppressed by the social norms of gender hierarchy, she sought to reform society’s view on the cultural perspectives of women and their sexuality (She expressed her love for a woman in one of her poems, but many still argued on whether she identified herself as queer or not.)

"Thou Shalt Not Die," Yosano's ability, is actually named after one of Sho Ho's most famous, controversial poems. She wrote it for her brother, who was a soldier in the war between Russia and Japan (1904-1905). In her poem, she expressed her general distaste for war and how her brother was a part of it.

O my young brother, I cry for you Don't you understand you must not die! You who were born the last of all Command a special store of parents' love

Would parents place a blade in children's hands

Teaching them to murder other men Teaching them to kill and then to die? Have you so learned and grown to twenty-four?

- excerpt from Sho Ho's poem, "Kimi Shinitamou Koto Nakare"

Her words were blunt enough to inflict guilt on her brother's conscience, as she wasn't afraid to express her disapproval over how her brother took part in the typical violent bloodshed and manslaughter of war. Such opinions perturbed the authorities, and her work was eventually banned from the public for a period of time. Later on, it was used as an anti-war statement.

2. Yosano's history.

Now, as for the character in BSD, Yosano is seen to be generally strong-willed, and later on, we see that she is terrifyingly compassionately ambitious in the way she treats her patients. She treasured life itself, and hated the thought of losing a patient.

Yosano had developed her relations with Mori Ougai back in the Great War, when she was just 11 years old. Her ability was a great benefactor in saving lives. Realistically speaking, she was used for her ability to heal injured soldiers and diminish the effect of any casualty acquired.

Initially, she wasn't aware of this, until one of her close friends pointed it out by subtly accusing Mori of manipulating her to participate in the War under the close-to false pretence of 'saving lives.'

As much as her ability did save lives, it also forced soldiers to return to the frontlines and suffer injuries over and over again. The soldiers were never given the opportunity to return to their families because of her ability. This obliged them to carry on in the war without any excuse, inserting them into a vicious cycle they had no escape out of.

Metaphorically speaking, Yosano's hatred for Mori sort of mirrors Sho Ho's disdain for war and fighting, don't you think? The way Kafka materialised Yosano's past was quite interesting because he used chapters 65 and 66 to explain Yosano's dislike for Mori, reflecting how Sho Ho used her poem to explain why she condemned the idea of war and how her brother was part of it.

Before the effect of her ability was fully understood, however, every soldier praised and thanked her for what an angel she was. One of the soldiers she had befriended and gotten close to even kept a tally of the number of times she had saved him. He was the one who gifted her the butterfly hairpin she wore all the time.

The weight of the truth that her ability was a curse rather than a blessing fully dawned on her when her soldier friend ultimately committed suicide, because the fact of being indefinitely trapped in the throes of war agonised him until his spirit gave out. This drove Yosano to loathe her ability, or rather, how it was used.

In the time she participated in the War, Yosano was given the alias 'angel of death' due to the control she retained over the battlefield, but I thought that perhaps Kafka had a reason behind giving her this title, so I did my research.

3. 'Angel of Death' defined.

Side note: I wouldn't want to disrespect any culture or religion, so if my citations are inaccurate and/or disrespectful, do feel free to correct me/let me know! I did research out of pure curiosity, and I don't intend to twist the significance of any of the interpretations.

I had to grow up learning about the basics of religious stuff, so it's kind of nice to study something out of the box, and very much against my father's rigid belief system :D

ARCHANGEL ARIEL

(archangel: an angel of higher rank)

I came across the few characteristics of angels/goddesses and their roles, and the one which really caught my attention was the female archangel, Ariel, the angel of nature.

[ source ]

In Hebrew, the name Ariel means 'altar' or 'lioness of God,' and her role is to heal. In addition to that, she is also recognised as a helper to another one of the seven main archangels, Raphael, whose role is to provide physical and emotional healing, too.

She is the protecter of the environment and the animals therein, and is bestowed with the duty to oversee the order of heavenly bodies as well as earth's natural resources. She assures the sustenance of food, water, shelter, and supplies of human beings, much like how a nurse is to a patient I suppose.

In relation to Yosano, I think this part is pretty self-explanatory, or perhaps this is blown out of proportion HA, so take this as a suggestion rather than a fact, because I'd like to believe that Kafka had a reason for giving Yosano a title as such.

In the past, I've come across the angel of death only to perceive it as a female grim reaper of some sort, so it was pretty cool to find that the word 'angel' and 'death' made up a title of a someone like Ariel, one of the purest forms of humility and compassion.

GREEK GODDESS PANAKEIA

For my beloved (wannabe/or not) students of Greek mythology (much like myself, let's make a cult!), you've probably heard of Panakeia, the goddess of healing. Medicine finds most of its vital significance in Greek history, and in its mythology, Panakeia is actually known for her ability to heal any kind of sickness.

[ source ]

Her name means 'panacea,' which is actually defined as a remedy for all diseases. Terminal diseases and injuries lead to death, right? This would bring us back to Yosano's ability to nullify any injury's effects on a person, keeping them from death itself.

Now, we know that in order for Yosano's ability to work, her patient, or victim, has to be in a near-death condition in order for her treatment to take effect. This can't exactly fit into the description of resurrection, but it can be described as some sort of rebirth.

GREEK GODDESS PERSEPHONE

So another goddess which reminds me of Sho Ho/Yosano, is Persephone, the goddess of spring and rebirth. Before Hades, the god of the underworld, fell in love with Persephone to take her to live with him, Persephone lived a happy life.

Hades, with his nature of darkness and the like, was captivated by how pure Persephone was, and stole her away from her former life to live in an environment which differed sharply from her natural aura of purity.

[ source ]

Remember when Yosano's friend left a note behind before he killed himself? The note said nothing except for, "You are too righteous." Take that as you will, but figuratively speaking, you could say Mori takes the role of Hades in the story, while Yosano can be portrayed as Persephone.

Sho Ho can also be a parallel of Persephone, in that she had to adapt to the realities of war and disharmony, while Persephone had to adapt to the raw darkness of the underworld with Hades.

Sho Ho stood against society's norms and decided to reform it, making her one of the most well-known feministic pacifist in history, while Persephone managed to escape from the underworld to return to her former position, earning the title the 'Bringer of Life,' or the 'Destroyer of Death.'

Furthermore, the way Sho Ho's anti-war poem took its effect later on, reflects the way Persephone restored balance in the world after returning from the underworld.

4. Yosano and Atsushi.

chapter 66; Yosano: "It's my fault that those close to me died... Is there some place where it's okay for me to live?"

chapter 8; Atsushi: "If I have any chance of saving them all, of returning them home safely, would that mean it's okay for me to keep on living?"

I couldn't help but think of Dazai and Atsushi back when I was reading through these panels. Ranpo (my beloved), along with Fukuzawa, accepted Yosano as she was, despite how her ability was a cause of despair and misfortune.

Ranpo looked past her mistakes and the entirety of how dark her past was to welcome her into the Armed Detective Agency. Dazai, on the other hand, knew who Atsushi was and what his ability had made him do before anyone else, and still decided to provide a safe place for Atsushi to find his sense of belonging, journeying with him as he learned to use his ability properly.

For more info about Dazai and Atsushi's dynamic, you can check out the analysis I did for Dazai :D

Atsushi desired to save people to prove his right to live, while Yosano made her wish to achieve the recovery of all her patients the reason for her existence.

Others would prefer to accuse both Yosano and Atsushi of having a saviour complex, but the reason why they pursued to save people with utmost dedication, stems from the nature of what their past was like. You know the saying 'from broken to beautiful?' Yeah, it's something like that.

The way their pasts were written out gave them a desire to change, which was, I daresay, initiated by the people who took them in: Ranpo and Dazai. Their abilities were demonised because of how they were used, but once they broke from their abilities' effect over their lives, they honed their skills to control them for the right cause instead.

In a less cynical point of view, I believe both Yosano and Atsushi stood for what was right, and wanted nothing but to achieve peace and harmony in whatever way they could, even if it meant risking their own lives to save others.

So yeah, that's it for my rants today. Thank you for reading, and if you have anything to add, go ahead! I'm open to discussions ;)

[randomestpersononearth]

Questions

(Or headcanons or rhetorical questions or story times or why do I keep doing this part or all of you should know that questions are an umbrella term so that when I'm bored, and can find this post again.)

*EXTREME EXHALE*

The post will be under the cut thing, since it's gonna be long.

1. Why does everyone have phones?

Who thought that this was ok? Also who found the materials to give a bunch of criminals phones. I know that this is "rainbow magic reality smear" Prison, but why?

Its not like I'm against it, it could give them insight to the real world, and teach responsibly?

I just wouldn't give them phones.

But I wouldnt be surprised if they were like school computers, so when you try to go to CoolMathGames, they will block you. That is a good idea, but still it's weird.

2. Why is Isou always around children?

He was around Noriko when she was a child, he hung around Manji that one time, (I classify Manji as a child since Manji is Ban, yada yada, go to my past Questions post for more explanation,) and now he is the weird Sub at Nadeshikos school.

Whats with the kids Isou?

Ya like kids?

I'm kinda thinking that he is like the "Child Outreach Specialist" or something?

I know that this

Is a lot more approachable than this,

But still, why does there have to be a separate goon for the kids?

Why not put elf in a actual elf costume, and have him be around the kids!

The Man with the Scar could save some money or wouldn't have go deal with all that Elf and Isou drama.

Maybe Elf doesn't like kids? Or he doesnt want to be asked stupid questions by kids? Either way, I'm not complaining since I enjoy Isou and his...

Ummm

Ability to be evil but not that evil.

Now we are getting to more of the talk about it stuff. (Not really questions)

3. Yakumo and Tsu-in existed since part 2 of the manga.

Proof

Gotta look pretty hard but once you see it, you never go back.

4. The Uno theory

This was mostly a Discord thing, but I am taking the liberty to talk about it here.

Due to the fact that Uno doesn't have a backstory, "game builder garbage and nanbaka" has decided that Uno could be evil.

Now, as much as it worries me to think about, Uno can't be evil, since every person who is a Elf... person or cronie or bro? I don't know, has pointy ears!!

*Disclamer, I pulled this theory right out of my ass, so it may not be correct. It's not the only reason why I don't think Uno is evil, i just wanted to bring it up.*

Yup, that's right if Elf can posses you, then you have pointy ears. Not as pointy as Elfs ears but not in the regular shape of a normal persons ear.

Example

I would love to show a picture of Uno without pointy ears, but HIS HAIR COVERING HIS EARS!!! And I dont feel like searching the manga for ear pictures right now. Ugh you and your gorgeous hair.

You get my point.

(Pun intended)

Another reason why Uno isn't evil, is that SHIN'S GOT ALL THE EVIL ELF SNITCH COVERED!!!!

Agghhh!! Shin!!!

Proof

WHAT ORDERS!!!

This is kinda out of context, so here is some context, this was before Zakuro and Ikkaku arrived at Nanba. Chapter 191 or 192, (im out of coins now searching for that.) But who else would he be talking to due to the context of the statement!!

SHIN IS EVIL!!!!

WHY WHOULD ANY PRISON WANT A BUNCH OF SUPER HUMANS, SUPER HUMANING IT UP!! SHIN HANDED, the lovely, MISS MOMOKO A BUCKET OF LIES!!!! HE LIED TO THE CAUSE, HE LIED TO MOMOKO!! FIRE HIM!!

Sorry for the all caps, I feel every strongly about HOW MUCH SHIN SUCKS!!!!

That's it.

And that also anwsers my

Why does Shin need an anvil to crush him in the skull? question from awhile back.

[updatingranboo]

Okay, this is super duper long, but I copied down Mark's entire transcript here for anyone who doesn't have twitter! I adjusted it and changed very slight words just for the ease of reading, but this is all of the important things from todays stream. here:

Ranboo: "Honestly, I feel like I have to say this for a lot of people, its that there is a certain amount of people that I believe still do not get when I establish how I want you guys to act in chat. I'm gonna be real, based on a lot of the reactions to a lot of stuff today. I am not the person I was when I started this. Ok? There are people who still think I am the same person I was even just a year ago and everything, and the thing is it's the same people who go into other people's chats when I say something.

Like the fact that I got a dm saying like, "Hey I had people in my chat saying you have ADHD" when I didn't say that and I cleared it up and everything and the fact that you guys would go into another person's chat to say that is so incredibly stupid and I do not like it when people do that and I've said so many times how I want you guys to act in chat and the people who are just ignoring it, you are just gonna start to be timed out for a while and you are just gonna start to be banned. Alright?

That's the thing, and I know there's gonna be people who are gonna say I'm gonna go "oh I'm gonna go against what the streamers says cause it's funny" and the thing is right, my content has gotten more mature as I've matured. My content has changed, it shifted from what it was and there's a reason. There are many, many reasons why my content has done that. Ok?

There are plenty of reasons, all of which I can't go into as to why I've switched up my content and to why I'm no longer comfortable doing the content that I used to do. Ok? And to the people who do not respect that, to the people who try to shove me back into where I was a couple of years ago, I do not like that. I do not like when that's in chat, I do not like when people bring up other people, I do not like when people bring up other streamers, other things, old things. Not necessarily old things. You can bring up old things as long as you do so in a way that shows that you understand that I have moved in from it for a very good reason.

And to the people that are like "oh that's not me", it could be! It could be you! You have to look back on yourself. Ok? I'm not one to say, you know, "if you haven't watched me in a while and you still like my old content then you're gonna be banned", that's not what I'm saying. What I'm saying is that if you continuously try to just completely break all the rules that we have in chat then you will be banned.

Just the fact that people chat hopped when I said I was gonna be on ADHD medication because it's something that I'm figuring out. I am vocal about that because of the fact that I don't want people to feel alone about it. I am vocal about that because of the fact that I think it's something that is very very stigmatized that people should just be open about but the thing is that you make me afraid to say that when you treat it so incredibly wrong by going into another person's chat and saying that. That doesn't make sense. That's the thing, why? Why would you need to do that.

I understand that there's a lot of people here that may be young. I understand that there may be a lot of people here that may be immature. That is ok but the thing is you have to think. There's so many people that I've seen who just do not think before they speak. And it is so just awful to see people get into arguments all the time, to see people get into fights that I don't necessarily care about all too much.

The thing is that, if there's some wrong going on, I will talk about it. You should not be attacking other people on behalf of me unless it's something I've already stated and even then you shouldn't be attacking people, you should be respectfully saying "hey, Ranboo doesn't like when you do this." That's the thing. I've seen so many people getting into pointless arguments. Not everyone is gonna like my content, not everyone is gonna like me, that's ok. You shouldn't argue with people who don't like me. I don't care. You shouldn't either. That's a huge thing cause you shouldn't either.

You shouldn't attack people on behalf of me cause again, if there's something wrong that's going on, I will talk about it and today was just an entire thing 'cause I know a lot of artists get a lot of slack for drawing me a certain way. If I had a problem with that I would have spoken about it. If there was something that was going on so many times that I had a problem with them I would have spoken about it and I always will.

If there is something that makes me uncomfortable then I will talk about it. And this isn't an invention to go and break every boundary that I have. That's obviously not what I'm trying to say. What I'm trying to say is for the people that are like "what if he's not ok with this" and I'm fine with it, I should not have to explicitly approve or deny every single piece of art someone makes, every single thing in chat someone says.

You guys should have that in your mind already of the fact that if I don't care, you shouldn't either. I see so many other peoples fanbases and how they act and everything and sometimes I can't help but wish you guys just enjoyed the stuff I'm putting out. Why do you try to put yourself into arguments that do not matter. Obviously there's arguments that matter and there's arguments that don't matter and the reason why I've basically gone off of twitter completely is because there are so many people that fight arguments that do not matter.

I will not care if someone calls one of my projects bad. I will not care. I see that every single day. And it should not affect you. I get it, if it does affect you 'cause of the mental thing of like "this person is insulting something I like", but people should be allowed to have opinions. Even people who are fans of me should be allowed to have opinions. If I don't have a good stream people should be allowed to say I don't have a good stream without being afraid of how people will act around it.

I am an adult. I'm no longer the 16-17 year old that I was during my peak of everything and I know there are people who still view me as that. I can take care of myself. People can compliment me without having to worry about people attacking them for it. I don't care. As long as nothing is explicit then I really don't care. People can say whatever. I have stated my boundaries already and if I had a problem with what people were saying then I'd say something about it.

That's an important thing. If you're sitting here going "oh that wasn't me" then you're going into other people's chats saying "oh Ranboo has this he said on stream" then you are the person I'm talking about. You are the person I'm talking about.

I probably should have done this on the rebrand but I'm doing it now. There's just so much. Whenever someone potentially crosses a boundary I see so many people immediately attacking them and insulting them instead of like, maybe replying and telling them what they did wrong and moving on.

You shouldn't have to bring attention to bad things cause all that will do is give it more publicity. That's sometimes what they want, the person who is saying bad things. They want that publicity, they want that outrage. They say it because of the fact that they want that reaction and if you just do not give them that reaction right? Cause you just shouldn't care cause I don't care.

And I know that I'm saying it very explicitly and I know that I'm saying it in a very passionate way but I care because it's how you guys act and I want you guys to act better cause I want to continue to enjoy what I do.

The fact that I don't go on Twitter as much cause it used to give me constant anxiety attacks should not be a thing. The fact that I don't like chat sometimes cause you guys are not normal about things that are completely normal cause like, I'm a nonbinary person. Who cares if I have bahoingas or not? That's the thing, I'm experimenting with how I look, I'm experimenting with my gender identity, I'm experimenting with everything. You guys should not make it such a huge thing. There is so, so much. It's something that I've wanted to say. I should be allowed to cause I'm a goddamn adult.

That's the thing, if you're gonna make a huge deal about it to the point that it's too much- I want to start to make the content that I want to make and for the last couple of months or so I have felt that because of how people view me already, I have not been able to do that. And that's what the rebrand is for. I wish I had said this during the rebrand but I got nervous so I didn't. Again, just be good people and only highlight good people.

Obviously you can talk when there's problems, that's not what I'm saying. What I'm saying is you have to uplift the good in order to make the community seem good as well. Not too many people do that. I'm all for getting rid of the problems. I will continue to make statements if I need to to get rid of the problems in the community but the thing is you guys have to uplift the good. Uplift the people who are doing good. That's a huge thing. Uplift the minorities that are helping this community be more understanding, be more good.

People will say "I can't believe this thing was said in chat" and will show a screenshot of chat and there will be 100 people going "oh my god I can't believe how awful his chat is" when you could be saying "hey, look how funny this person in chat is" and there would be just as many people saying "oh wow that's a funny message." It's so easy to shift your mindset and shift how you do posts about things. Uplift the good cause the bad gets thrown out. Don't give the idiots who are doing really stupid stuff attention. The block button, the mute button, they exist for a reason on every single goddamn platform.

And Also, I'm going to be kind of shifting and experimenting with my gender identity and everything and I should be able to do that without having a bunch of people being weird towards me. I'm fine with compliments. I'm fine with comments as long as anything isn't genuinely explicit then I do not care. People have drawn me every single which way and I have not said for a second that I'm uncomfortable with it. So you should not be going "oh should we not be doing this cause Ranboo might not be comfortable with it." Goddamn I look through the Ranboo fanart page.

You don't have to speak for me, I can speak for myself. It's been on my mind for a long time and I haven't really said it has much because I was really worried about wording it and I don't want people to feel alienated just because they enjoy my old content and you want to enjoy my new stuff.

That's another thing, if people come from my old content, you have to be kind towards them cause they might not understand. If people want to make gender comments which may not be a thing anymore you can just be like "hey, it's a joke, he doesn't really do that thing anymore." Be nice, don't be like "look at this idiot." They're gonna make a mistake and be so afraid to make another mistake that they're not even going to try. People should be allowed to make mistakes and learn from them. That is such an important thing. People should be allowed to make mistakes just as I've made mistakes and learned from them. There have been so many things, things I haven't even made a huge deal about that I've gone "oh, maybe I won't say it this way" and then I continue on.

Because everyone comes from a different background, people should be allowed to make mistakes. Obviously, there are some mistakes that are way worse than others and some that are unforgivable. That's not what I'm saying. What I'm saying is that if they say like, the "Ranboo enderman" thing, if they still like my content they shouldn't be scared off because of that. Be kind. At the end of the day.

People love doing the thing where they're like "oh my god I'm such a hater". That's not a healthy mindset for anyone involved and it is such a toxic thing to constantly be looking for problems and constantly look for people you can reply to and be mean towards. Even if it's for a good reason. There comes a point where you should try to be understanding at first. Give people the chance to learn 'cause I'm not going to grow as a content creator if everyone is always trying to attack people who just make simple mistakes.

So just be positive. Enjoy my content, make silly things, make clips, make clip compilations. Put that energy into stuff that you enjoy in the community cause that's way more fun. And I do not want anyone coming from this being like "oh you used to do this, Ranboo said this was wrong" 'cause you're doing the exact thing I don't want you to do. Simply learn and act. You should care about how you act first.

That is the most important thing. You should care about how you act first. Cause if everyone cares about how they act first then there won't be any fingers to point. There won't be any situations where people are pointing fingers at absolutely everyone. It's not a good mindset to have.

I want to be able to continue doing this job. I want to be able to continue having fun doing this job. And I want you guys to continue being a highlight to this job like you have been. Cause you guys have been. There has been a lot of good. There's been a lot of funny chat messages. I absolutely adore it when you guys put in a funny little quip that makes me smile.

You guys have been a highlight of this job and I want you guys to continue to do that but I feel like I'm the past 7 months there has been a large shift that I have felt that I have not liked. And I have tried so many times to be nice about it which I probably shouldn't have, there's so many times I've tried to say it and at this point I want to be able to go live and enjoy what you guys are doing. I want to be able to see what the silly community is doing and not feel extremely anxious. There has been a lot. So please, be kind. I hope that you guys took all the right stuff from this.

You guys have been such a blessing in my life and I want you guys to continue to be able to do that. I want to be able to continue to feel comfortable around you guys, to be like "hey yeah, I'm on ADHD medication" and not have people make it such a huge thing to the point that that's what I'm known as or that's what you're saying in other people's chats. That shouldn't happen. While I have matured, I feel like most of the community has stayed the same and I feel like it's time for all of us to have that wake up call and sort of start shifting over. If people are new in chat, if they don't know all the rules cause obviously they won't cause they haven't watched me as much.

It's completely ok if you feel nice cause your streamer goes through the same things that you do. Of course I do, I'm human. You guys shouldn't be shaming new chatters for things. You guys shouldn't be shaming anyone for anything. You were all there, you were new chatters who didn't know how to act. Just because you've moved on from it doesn't make you necessarily better than anyone else. I'm not gonna sit here and say I'm better than the person I was a year ago but I will say I have learned and I have grown from the person I was a year ago.

And also, if you've watched me to the point that you think I'm not gonna make mistakes, I am going to make mistakes. I'm going to say things that may not be completely right and I'm going to do things that may not be completely right and it's up to you guys to go "hey this upset me a little bit, if you could change that would be great." And the thing is there have been people who have said "hey, this statement you said wasn't too good" and I saw it and I changed it. I always try to learn, if there's ever a mistake I keep repeating, that is the point I think that people have to go "alright we have to make a bigger deal about this" cause it's something I obviously don't care about. Just, be kind. At the end of the day.

I want you guys to learn from this. I want you guys to change so that I continue to enjoy the content that I'm making. Because I will just kind of go back a little bit. I really want to be able continue to enjoy the community. I've had to stop being able to use twitter because of the way I've just not enjoyed the community. I've had to not look at chat anymore because of the way the community has been acting. I want to be silly again. I want to be silly with you guys again. I want to joke around. I want to have everyone not have to be so completely serious and everyone can't make a mistake or anything or draw me a certain way which again, I will talk about things of things get out of hand. I mean c'mon, look at my vtuber! Who cares!

Anyways, I'm going to start being more comfortable with myself and if you're uncomfortable on my behalf then that is a problem with you, not with me. So you should not try to say anything. You should not try to shame people for simply doing what they want to do.

At the end of the day, the main take away's from this is be kind, the block and mute buttons exist for a reason, do not get into goddamn random arguments that do matter with people that do not like me. That's a huge thing, people won't like me, will always won't like me.

That's how the internet works. There's people who don't like Markiplier and Markiplier one of the best people imaginable. You shouldn't try to get into an argument with every goddamn person that says they don't like what I do cause they will never like what I do. Everyone has their own personal preference. You should allow that. By saying "oh this is better then what that person made", all you're doing is giving them a reason to attack both me and you. And you don't want that. I don't want that.

I hope you guys heard this and I hope you guys listened. At the end of the day, I appreciate you guys and I appreciate what you guys have given, but I appreciate you to the point that I know you guys can do better. I can appreciate you guys to the point that I know there are problems to be fixed. And I know this was a long time coming, I should have said it earlier.

I'm saying this cause I want to go live and enjoy my time and I want you guys to enjoy as well. Just chill. I'm a goddamn streamer, I'm a goddamn variety streamer. Things should not be serious all the time. People should not be walking on eggshells on what jokes to make. Y'all have to realize that it's a stream, it's a joke, you guys should be silly. Do more funny events, do more funny bits. Do more silly things. Be a community.

Also, you don't have to be in the community if you watch me. That's another thing. You just watched me and you enjoy my stuff then absolutely do that. You do not have to be associated or be a part of my community if you enjoy my stuff. Just enjoy my stuff if you want to enjoy it.

At the end of the day I will be just as grateful for each and every single person that does that because of the fact that you absolutely transformed a young queer kids life from thinking that I would have to constantly work in a job I didn't like and do things I didn't want to do, and you guys transformed that into literally what I've wanted to do my entire life. You guys have helped me so much and I want you guys to continue to be able to do that.

I want to be able to share more of myself with you and not have to worry about how you guys will treat other people because of it. You guys have helped me so much and I want you guys to continue to do that. I'm also saying this because in the last couple months I have felt like it is shifted in a way that I really have not liked. And I feel like everyone should just take a step back and think about it.

At the end of the day, the internet is the internet. Problems on the internet are not as big as problems in real life. I need you guys to take care of yourselves first. Cause I can assure I do not not cry, piss my pants and shit and die every single time I see that someone doesn't like generation loss. I could care less. So you guys should feel the same way. So please, be kind. Treat people with kindness first. I want to be able to return and be comfortable in my own goddamn community.

Allow people to make mistakes and learn from them."

someone made a transcript on twitter i’m pretty sure, maybe you could link that?

that's my lovely mutual mark! yes, if you want/need a transcript from ranboo's conversation at the end of stream, you can find it here :D

mark worked really hard on it and transcribed it by hand so if you have twitter you should totally give it a like and rt

[athena-is-a-chaotic-lil-shit]

Of Ice and Blood

Part 5

Look who's back with a 5k+ word count chapter?! Me!

I was planning on posting 1k+ at a time but stuff happened and I'm posting it all at once!

Enjoy and I'd appreciate it dearly if you reblog! Thank you!

Edit: Reached the 250 block limit so... The inevitable decision had to be made! Part 5 has a total of 3.42k words! The rest will be in a separate post <3

Pairing: Tai'chi Kashharzol (Orc) x Pearl Blackbell (Human OC/Reader)

Warnings: Cursing, Violence, brief mentions of blood and injury.

Overall SFW (but 16+ for language)

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4 Part 6

*

The walk back to the school building was quiet.

Or so I thought.

Because it wasn't. At all.

Whispers, mutterings, echoed from the rooms as we passed by.

Are they doing it on purpose, or is my hearing sharper than usual?

"Hey look it's that girl."

"You mean the freak who sat beside the orc—"

"First day of school and someone already got killed. Should've expected him to be a savage."

"You think she wears a mask to hide her identity? Maybe she's a criminal-"

Probably the latter.

I shrugged. There stood a decent amount of distance between us anyway. So it's likely my hearing.

Students were watching us with weird suspecting eyes from a distance behind the windows. Sensing apprehension and outward hate when they saw Tai'chi next to me, his face in a neutral expression. But with my nose at this proximity, he smells pretty annoyed.

Just— why are there so many people,— humans–garnering these feelings towards someone they don't even know! And to even mock him like that! How dare —

"Pearl," Tai'chi called. His rich voice resonating, making the gossips of the students stop for a brief moment before they continued. Most likely slandering my name now. I didn't know I was standing still. Looking up, Tai'chi was a decent 9 meters away, with the staff members further ahead of him. He gave me a wondering look, worry along with his natural fragrance, drifted through me, carried by air.

I straightened up and took long strides, Tai'chi beside me, to catch up with them.

"Yeah, just thinking. I'm okay." Replying, not looking up to him. He didn't ask, but I felt like he would.

************short pov shift************

He was a bit bothered by the change in your scent and looked back when he noticed you weren't beside him anymore. There you were, standing in the middle of the wide hallway, brows scrunched up in aggravation.

He called out to you, probably a little louder than he meant to, but you looked up and hastily made your way beside him, both of you catching up to the rest towards the dean's office. He didn't ask, but you answered, only making him worry even more.

**********first person pov**************

As soon as we entered the main office of the center building, we were greeted with the sight of the dean and David, together with Miss Holson. He was a white fat man, though a bit taller than me, wearing a light grey suit with a few buttons open revealing a white undershirt, and a silly yellow, violet polka dot tie. I barely held back from snorting at the sight.

Mr. Silverstone was fussing over his son, his voice raised in slight panic was heard by everyone.

They went ahead of us then.

"My son! My dear, dear David! Who did this to you?!" he cried out. Once David, that son of a bitch, spotted me, he flashed me that blasted grin of his. He was acting, pretending to be hurt.

I hardly even left a scratch on him for fuck's sake. How I regret not punching him straight in the face.

Reverting to his fake, frightened, and miserable state, he pointed at me. "I-I-It's her father! She is the one who attacked me! Along with that thing with her."

Thing?! That sick bastard!

The dean whipped his head in my direction, eyes scanning me up and down before he diverted them to Tai'chi.

Well, it seems I'll ve packing up sooner than I thought.

My shoulders sagged.

Some professors were alarmed by this, frantically pushing forward to grab his attention.

"Mr. Silverstone, we still do not know what's for certain. We must interrogate them properly and listen to each of their sides before we make a decision." Mr. Dulrik asserted, his voice strained and close to animosity. He was not pleased with what the student had said.

The elder professor from earlier followed up.

"Listen to Mr. Dulrik, sir. We cannot take any risks and ju—"

"Silence!" the dean shouted. "I will not hear your reasoning. My son has told me everything I need to know. Miss Holson supported his claims and that's enough to decide what to do with these criminals."

Criminals?!

"The girl and that orc shall be expelled from this institution immediately. We do not need any murderers or barbarians here. I have always suspected why that Ernestine brat even allowed these monstrosities to be with us. To breathe the same air and walk the same land as we do, endangering our safety no less! A pathetic excuse of a founder she is! If it were me I would've—"

"You would've what?" Words came out before I stopped myself, my voice low, but it was heard still, drawing their attention to me.

"What did you just say?" He demanded, his anger slipping out more. The room was silent, except for the subtle ticking of the wall clock behind me, and the movement of air around us.

I lifted my head and looked at him dead in the eye. "You would've what?" This time, I replied, louder.

Before he could retort I went on, emotion fueling my words as I advanced with every question asked.

"Would've banned every single, non-human race from the university?

"Would've taught every human that they are greater beings and the ones that were different were meant to be stepped on?

"Would've ordered and tolerated bullying on anyone who was unnatural and weird looking?

"Would've put them in their place?

Isolate them? Degrade them? Despise them for being alive?" No-one stopped me as I approached him, the teachers separating and making way. Even Mr. Dulrik was regarding me curiously.

I scoffed. " 'If it were me' you said. You think I wouldn't notice how everyone else, that isn't human, was oppressed and treated like shit in this school? It seems to me that you already did what you would've done, didn't you? You are no dean, you are a clown, a pillock, a dumbass, and you call yourself human? You are more monster than any of us in this room."

I breathed heavily as I stood a couple of feet in front of him. His face grew to a crimson hue, my ears catching the sound of smoke seething out of him. At the back, David and Miss Holson were dumbfounded, shocked into place, shaken like ugly statues.

Finally, the dean spoke, his fists clenching hard as he faced me, almost drawing blood.

I am so gonna beat him up. Hell yeah, I will.

"Keep out of trouble if you can." Well, shit happened Mama, forgive me.

"How dare you speak to me like that! I, a pure-blood Silverstone, a line of royalty! If we were still at war I would've had you executed from where you stand—"

"How about you do it yourself then, oh mighty Silverstone jerk?" I mocked and gave a toothy smile, then I remembered he wouldn't see it. That was all it took to have him launching himself at me, the professors running to the sides to avoid his wrath.

His hands were balled tight, a fist aiming for my face, eyes filled with deadly intent.

Oh, he really wants to kill me.

Before it connected, I sidestepped, causing him to stumble forward. Even so, he immediately regained his balance and reached to grab my hoodie. I didn't dodge this time, but before he touched me, I used my right hand to slap it away. With my other hand, fitted with my crimson knuckle dusters, I met his fist with mine. Almost instantly, he stumbled back and crouched down, his left hand holding his bloodied one.

"You bitch!!!" he screamed in agony.

I think I broke his hand.

I glanced to my brass knuckles, some of the blood covering them, merely visible because of its color.

Shattered it perhaps.

"I will have you killed you insolent brat! I'll kill you!" he cursed.

"Now, now, Silverstone, you will do no such thing." A feminine voice cut through the large room. We all turned to the door to see a slim, tall, tanned woman who seemed to be in her 40s, her slightly wrinkled face showing it. She was wearing a black high-waist pencil skirt paired with a black one-button suit and a baby blue undershirt. The lady also wore classic white loafers and white hand gloves made of leather, with her ebony hair tied up in a bun.

Everything about her screams 'important'. I scented an intimidating yet reassuring aura around her.

I met her eyes and a sense of familiarity fell upon me. I know her and I've seen her before.

Wait. Could it be— she's—

"Madame Ernestine!" A professor exclaimed.

That means she's, "The founder," I said out loud.

She began sauntering in my direction, each step clicking on the floor, carrying herself with grace.

"M-Ma-Madame Ernestine!" The dean, shrieked as he stood up, shaking, his busted hand in his chest, his back facing me. "I didn't expect you to visit this year! We could've prepared for your arrival—"

"You shut your mouth now Welmir." She spoke out, her voice firm and borderline hostile. "I've had enough of your blabbering mug. I made it so that my arrival is unexpected. Leaving my outside duties rather early and rushed this year when news got to me that you, the dean, were neglecting your duties, or so, doing it wrong. Not to mention I had my assistant install extra cameras in... certain places last year and because of that, I saw what you did in the shadows. Maybe not all, but it confirmed my suspicions of you, and so," She clapped her together, "I decided to visit you today. And what a surprise it was to see you get beaten up by this lovely young lady behind you."

Me?! Lovely—

My face warmed from her comment.

"Listen here, brat." he regarded the founder. The founder. "I do not know what you are talking about. I have done my duties and more for this university. I made it so that everyone here is safe and this girl,"— he spat— "harmed me, my precious son, and his friends!"

"And all of you deserved it, severely," she responded flatly. "You put my dear students at risk and antagonized them with your schemes, tolerating the behavior of treating other races like animals, disrespecting even the professors who are different in kind," she glanced at Mr. Dulrik and the others. "You even forced a minotaur, an elf, and a dwarven student to act the part of being in a student council, hoping people wouldn't notice the crimes you did behind our backs. Did you expect me to turn blind eye to this?"

It was all pretend?!

The mere thought of what he did to threaten them to it makes me wanna puke.

"I am furious, Welmir Silverstone. To think I believed you'd change your ways after my father's death with the renovation of the institute. Trusted you to do your job as dean and make the students comfortable, welcomed. But, no. You chose to follow his footsteps, became selfish, blinded by greed and pointless hate. You are a disappointment to all of us."

I smelled her rage under that near non-expressive facade of hers. It was spicy, like fire having an odor of its own.

"You are but a child! You know nothing of this world! This world of ours needs to be purged off of those rats. You cannot tell me what to do!" He yelled as he brought up his uninjured hand to hit her. I was about to step in when Madame Ernestine grabbed his arm and threw a right uppercut, blood spilling out of his jaw. The punch sent him a few steps back, he would have landed on me if I didn't move out of the way before he collapsed on the floor groaning and holding his mouth.

Ooh she's strong! Nice! I grinned.

"You are hereby stripped off of your job as dean along with all of your titles, properties, and henceforth banished from these grounds, together with your son and Emma Holson, whom I found out laid with him, and the abusive acts they had engaged in." Her words laced with poison, disgust and anger as she gave the final judgement.

"Never show yourselves. Ever. Again," she spat. "Take them away."

Out of nowhere, men in black suits came in and apprehended the young instructor, who twisted her heel trying to escape. She yelled at them to let her go, saying she has done nothing wrong. David, the bastard, was held in place by one of them as he struggled in their grasp. The dean— or should I say, Mr. Silverstone, in pain and bleeding, was dragged up by two others and headed straight out of the door. He shouted ;

"Mark my words, brat! I will—"

And the door slammed close.

With my gaze following them, my eyes landed on Tai'chi. I took off my dusters and waved, tucking them back up my sleeve.

He is smiling! And oh wow he's damn gorgeous— wait what?

My attention was drawn away to the lady in front of me. I got distracted by Tai'chi that I almost forgot about her.

"Oh my God I uhm— hello Madame Ernestine." I took one step back before bowing. "It's an honor to meet you. I—"

"Oh dear, please raise your head. No need for such formal gestures. I am Valerie Ernestine, founder of the new Ernestine State University." She stated as she beamed at me.

"I uh- Yes ma'am I know of you. I'm quite a fan actually— I mean! My name is Pearl Blackbell, ma'am."

Oh God, that sounded so stupid.

Then she hugged me.

"Ma'am?!" I squeaked. My arms went stiff, nervous to even touch her. Before I could, she pulled back, a gentle expression on her face.

"Nice to meet you, Pearl Blackbell."

"I- nice to meet you too Ma'am Ernestine!" I stammered, praying my face and ears isn't as red as I feel them to be.

"Please, call me Valerie."

"Ma'am Valerie."

"Just Valerie, dear."

"I'm so sorry ma'am but I can't— my mother will hit me in the head with a frying pan if I forget my manners."

"Very well, then. It brings me joy that you were raised properly by your parents."

"Thank you ma'am, I really am happy to have them, and I only hope for them to be proud of me— oh wait. Uh, ma'am Valerie?"

"Yes?"

"Am I gonna get punished or expelled?" I shrunk, expecting the worst.

"Why ever did you think of that?"

"W-Well you see, I did harm uh, students and they're probably in the infirmary right now and—"

"Oh, Pearl, no." She let out a light chuckle. "You won't be punished or even expelled for that! In fact, I saw how you defended yourself and your friend from them. They did attack you first, sweetie. And what you did was impressive!" She clapped her hands. As I stood there in relief, I couldn't help but shot up when the words sank in.

"Oh, thank you. But how...?"

"Apparently, I had my assistant install some cameras in the forest area for particular reasons. I watched you from the monitor as I made my way here," she replied.

"Oh. Oh, wow. That's actually pretty awesome," I sighed.

"Indeed, it is," she smiled. "Excuse me for a bit."

******pov shift to 2nd person (two characters)*****

Madame Ernestine turned and walked towards the remaining teachers to talk about important matters at hand.

"Greetings, my friends." She beamed at the staff and looked at Professor Dulrik and the woman who supported him earlier. "Hello, Roldo and Amila. I have missed you dearly." She bent down to hug the two of them before she went on. "I apologize for not taking action immediately. To think he did this to all of you right under my nose! Why didn't you contact me Roldo?"

"My apologies, Madame Ernestine. I didn't have any proof to show his plot against you and the others. He was very elusive and kept us very busy in our own offices for the past year with you away. That was until today, with the young lady over there standing up against his son, he snapped."

"It really is a good thing she came here, didn't she?" she whispered.

"Indeed, Madame," Amila replied.

There was a brief silence, before Valerie spoke up again. Her gaze locked at the dwarven professor.

"Roldo, my old friend, I want you to take your place as the new dean of this university. I trust you to do your duty a hundred percent better than that impudent man ever did. Will you accept this responsibility?"

"I- Valerie this is-"

"Roldo, you are wise and have seen things most of us here have not. I will not force you on something you do not want, but I put my faith in you, to help me, along with the rest of the staff, to teach everyone here that all of us stand in equal ground, and that we must respect and acknowledge each individual, regardless of their kind. No one, no student, should ever feel uncomfortable in this haven of mine."

"I understand, Valerie." The dwarf took a deep breath and vowed;

"I, Roldo Dulrik, son of Grol II, son of Frerin, accept the responsibilities given to me as dean of Ernestine State University. I will do my duty to the best of my abilities, and remain loyal to you and to this institution." He responded as he thumped his right fist against his chest.

"I know you will, my friend." Valerie grinned at him, her eyes full of trust and hope.

While they were occupied with discussing certain issues, you tried to sneak away, only to be called back by Madame Ernestine.

"Pearl, my dear."

"Yes ma'am?"

"Thank you."

She had a soft smile, emotions clear on her face, directed at you. The founder, Valerie was thanking you for your bravery, kindness and overall honesty. You simply nodded and grinned from ear to ear behind your mask. You were, however, suddenly nervous when Valerie and the two professors approached you. No, actually, all of them were, but the others are heading out of the office, perhaps to go back to their respective classrooms and start working, they gave their thanks as they went out.

"Pearl Blackbell, a wonderful name!" Professor Dulrik remarked. "May the Gods bless you and shine upon you in all your days," he grinned. Before you could reply, Professor Amila hugged you and whispered. "Thank you, for beating up those idiots," —which made you giggle— "It was the right thing to do, and also I had to defend myself. and thank you, Professor Dulrik."

"Nonsense, call me Professor Roldo, lass." He patted your shoulder as he went past you and out of the office, but not before he slapped Tai'chi's forearm.

"You best protect her if you can, lad. Even so, it is obvious she won't need protecting!" He laughed, and went on, quietly, as if whispering. "...Be her friend, my boy. Her eyes...they show the pain she had gone through. You saw that in her, didn't you?"

Tai'chi simply nodded in response. He knew what he meant.

"Then do what you must. If word ever comes to me that you hurt her, I will hunt you down with me battle axe hidden in my office, you hear?"

This time, he chuckled. "I hear you, Professor. I won't. I swear on the the name of my clan, no harm will befall on her." He told him, his voice firm and true.

"That's what I'm talking about, lad!" He replied as he finally exited the room.

Tai'chi shifted his gaze to you. You and the dean were still talking so he stood there, patiently.

"We best be on our way. We still have a number of things to set straight. We will see you around, Miss Blackbell. Don't get into trouble now." The founder giggled.

"I will try my best, ma'am."

"Oh sure you will, sweetie. Goodluck. And oh, the two of you should start going back. It's past lunchbreak afterall." She said as the two ladies sauntered past you and went out.

"Thank you, we will." You said, mostly to yourself.

**************************************

Part 6 will be posted shortly! Like, shortly shortly. Like, an hour or so shortly. Stay tuned! Thank you for reaching this point uwu✨

Tags: @crackinanutshell @kokokatsworld @mitchiesdungeon <3

[raylee-kai]

When You Love Someone - Park Jae Hyung Chpt. 1 (Part 1/2)

Here's the thing.

You hated playing the guitar. 

You were clearly a keyboard/piano person but when you heard that Jae had volunteered himself at the local music shop, you barely hesitate to put your name down on the form for the guitar lessons. It might have got something got to do with the crush you harbor on the guy. 

Your hate of the guitar was mostly because of the fact that your fingers were never flexible enough to press on the strings, how loud and gritty the sounds of an electric guitar echoes and also how there were different ways to play with different songs.

Like what on earth was plucking? 

Why are there different ways to play one instrument? 

It didn't help that there were different ways to tune a guitar. The amount of time you struggled with the tuner was making you regret the decision but as soon as Jae smiles at you and helped you out, you found yourself back in the studio, practicing yet another song on the guitar.

"Have you been practicing your chords?"

You nod, totally forgetting that he was actually asking about guitar chords and not keyboard. He gave a small chuckle and settled in front of you.

"Great, let's see it!"

The next few minutes consisted of;

"Did you tune your guitar? It sounds a little weird.." 

"That's the G chord."

"Bring that finger here and this one here..." 

"Show me A chord..... Uh... That's C chord."

"That's not even a chord."

It was amazing how Jae was never frustrated with your inability to learn the chords because your limit was approaching fast. 

Every mistake you made, you simply want to throw the guitar down and leave but Jae was always there to stop you from doing that. With his kind smile and carefree attitude, you could not stop yourself from falling for him even more. He was honestly your only motivation to learn the guitar.Your frustration was clear on your face but once he ruffles your hair, you can't help it but to come back for the next session. 

"You did great! Just need a little more practice."

Jae flashed a proud smile when you get a chord right was the highlight of the entire lesson.

"That's it for today!"

Jae clapped his hands and pats your shoulder, as if signing to you that you did a good job. Your shy smile made its appearance along with a slight blush but luckily, his attention was on the notification of his phone. He briefly read through and perked up, catching you before you leave. 

"Before I forget, here!"

He held out a shiny silver ticket out to you and grinned.

"Umm... What is this?"

"There's a gig, tomorrow at Club Eclipse. Thought that maybe it would be nice for you to see a few live performances."

You eyed the ticket for a bit before you glance up at him.

"You'll be playing?"

"Not this time but I'll be sure to invite you next time! Pinky promise!"

He stuck out his pinky, wiggling childishly to which you curled with a small giggle. Jae gave you a ruffle on your hair before looking at his watch. 

"I'll pick you up at about 7 at the cafe near school?" 

"You have a license?" 

"Only one way to find out right?" 

He winked, smiling while you tried to bite back your smile. 

You might have went all out in trying to find the perfect outfit which had Seungmin groaning in pure annoyance at the fact that you just practically dumped a bunch of clothes infront of him. The amount of times that you ran into his bedroom's toilet and came out with a new outfit had him regretting his friendship with you.

As if he could break a childhood friendship that easy.

You and Seungmin met each other at a piano recital when the two of you were younger. Ever since then, it was as if it was fated for the two of you to be friends. Both of you kept getting into the same classes, courses and school with or without planning on it. Plus, it did not help that Wonpil, Seungmin's brother, was your partner for a piano recital which made the two of you even closer.

"Are you seriously doing this at my house?"

"I need fashion advice."

You pouted, turning away from the mirror for Seungmin's view. He barely gave you a glance and scoffed.

"Stop pouting. You ain't cute."

You pouted even more at his harsh words but it was just a Seungmin thing to do so you weren't offended in the slightest. 

"Why aren't you asking Hyunjin for fashion advice? He is better than the rest of us at fashion."

"YOU'RE A GENIUS, SEUNG!"

You immediately grabbed your phone and called Hyunjin over to Seungmin's house. It didn't take long for him to arrive but not alone.

"Who invited the sunshine twins here?"

"We are here for mental support!"

"Get out of my house."

"Why do you like Jae anyways?"

Felix's question threw you to a state of flabbergast.

"Why Jae?"

Jisung added on, while Hyunjin was picking up outfits and trying to pair them together.

You sat on Seungmin's mattress much to the other's displeasure and thought about it to yourself. 

At first, it was the smile. You always thought that Jae had a cute smile with how he smiles with his eyes. He had a variety of smiles from the playful mischievous grin to the tired yet blessed smirk. It stays in your mind every time and you could not help feeling warm seeing his smile.

"Who's that?"

You asked Seungmin, who had been re-reading his script for the tenth time that day. Your dear friend was a part of the MC line up for some after school event which he was extremely nervous for which was why you, his dear friend, was there to cheer him on.

"What?"

"That blonde? I don't think I had seen him before."

"Oh, Jae?" 

You raised a brow as if trying to get him to explain more. "He was a student here, my brother's senior. They called him back to help us with the event."

Your attention went to the blonde who was joking around with some of the MCs to calm their stage nerves. The way he threw his head back to laugh caused you to smile a little.

"Cute."

Then, you fell for his personality. How friendly and welcoming he was with everyone, how thoughtful to those he held those dear and how mature and gives the best advice at times. He was like a canvas with similar yet different shades that you would only realize after looking closely.

Jae was not close to Wonpil by any means. 

It did not mean that they hated each other or anything but it is just that their friend circles never really clashed. So, Jae had no reason to protect Wonpil like he did that one time during his third recital. 

During his third recital, the seniors had Wonpil running around, forcing him to do stuff which would make him late to the recital. They went as far as to cut his formal clothes causing him to turn up with red slick back hair and blue button up which had caused a ruckus among the audience and judges for not being professional. But without a doubt, he was able to pull a performance that had the audience crying and reaching out for their tissues. 

Unfortunately, Wonpil was disqualified and was banned from joining in another recital in the event hall for not being "professional" and was reported for "harassing" the seniors that he had helped. 

That had caused you and Seungmin to fume in pure anger with how you had seen Wonpil going around to help the seniors, even going as far as to cut his practice time. 

It was the first time you saw Wonpil getting upset that he walked away. 

You and Seungmin were about to storm into the judges when Jae reached before the two of you could and provided them with evidence and eyewitnesses of the seniors bullying Wonpil and forcing him on errands. You watched in pure amazement at how the older glared the seniors down. 

When you asked why would he stand up for a total stranger, his reply would always be the same. 

"Why not?"

After, you just could not help but pay attention to him no matter where he goes. It's like your eyes would constantly be searching for him. There was just something about his presence that made you look at him in amazement. 

What do you like about Jae?

"I don't know. I just like him."

You should probably trust Hyunjin more than you did because the outfit he put together really looked good. Not only you looked good but you also feel good in the outfit. So there you were with nervous jitters waiting outside the cafe for Jae, typing at your phone furiously, trying to calm yourself down. 

Millennium Line Unite (5)

Memelix : Still cant believe u got boss to give u today off

Memelix : On short notice

J.ONE : Not fair :(

SeungSky : I dont get y u guys complaining

SeungSky : M covering her shift 

SeungSky : If anyone want complain it be me

                                                    lmao he saw my ticket 

                                                    he just send me off 

Dramallama : boss said you need friends 

Dramallama : hes sad Minnie is ur only friend 

Dramallama : WHO TF CHANGE MY USER NAME 

Memelix changed Dramallama to PrettyJinnie 

PrettyJinnie : Aww

PrettyJinnie : Thanks baby

Memelix : Anything for my Prince 

J. ONE : my eyes

J. ONE : NEED BLEACH

SeungSky : No flirting 

SeungSky : Not in this christian household 

Memelix : jokes on you

Memelix : im catholic 

SeungSky : And Jisungs a rapper 

Memelix : ??? 

J. ONE : ??? 

PrettyJinnie : ??? 

                                         ??? 

SeungSky : it means idgaf 

                                        Ouch

                                        taht got to hurt 

SeungSky : Idgaf bout ur date either 

                                           :(

SeungSky : u made me work on my off day 

SeungSky : u officially out of my friend list 

J. ONE : at least u were in his list 

SeungSky : Han 

SeungSky : stfu 

Oh shit oh shit oh shit

Jae here gtg 

wish me lcuk

Memelix : Stay safe 

PrettyJinnie : Use protection 

J. ONE : good lcuk 

Private Chat : SeungSky

SeungSky : Text me ASAP if somethings wrong 

SeungSky : Don't accept drinks from strangers 

SeungSky : Stay close to Jae hyung

                                        Must u do this everytime 

SeungSky : U only have one braincell

SeungSky : It worries me that u dont have common sense 

                                        I do have 

                                        hope I dont make a fool of myself 

SeungSky : Tough words for a clown like u 

                                        f u 

"Coming in?" 

Jae's voice hollered from the car as you look up from your phone. You darted into the car taking the seat next to the driver's and greeted him casually. You tried to avoid his look, considering how he actually put effort in looking good and you could barely stop yourself from combusting at the sight. 

"Looking good today."

"Thanks. You too, Jae. It's been awhile since I saw you in something other than a shirt."

"That's cause I'm usually half awake and late for work."

"Well, does that mean that you are late everyday?" 

"Hush now little one."

Laughing quietly at his words, you guys started talking about random things and before you know it, you were already there in the club.

"Nervous?" 

He asked, seeing how you hesitate after parking the car nearby. An arm over your shoulder had you calming down almost instantly. It was as if just knowing that Jae was there brought you calmer. 

"Is this the wrong time to tell you that this is my first time going to a club?" 

"You mean to tell me… you're a club fetus?!" 

You giggle at his dramatic scandalised face and playfully pushed him away. He laughed and placed his hands on your shoulder leading the way. 

"Don't worry and just stay close."

[owldemon08]

you'll never understand  But why would you - open letter

this is an open letter to someone I talk to every single day and am really close to. they don't have Tumblr so if I know you in real life. it's not you. and I probably shouldn't have to say this but, trigger warning, I think? mainly for like trans people or people with like PTSD for like family divorce and mentions of verbal abuse, depression, suicide, and some other heavy stuff. so be cautious if you have a problem with that kind of stuff. 

Its been a while since we actually had this conversation but. I was never finished with it. you walked away before I could finish. and I'm not angry. you don't like fighting and I understand that but. I wanna finish. because you know that's how I am. I need to finish my thoughts. 

if you don't remember, which isn't hard to believe. I was talking about my parent's divorce. for the personal narrative essay. and I mentioned how hard it was to switch weekends with my dad and mom. I said how I had to plan the switch weeks, sometimes a month ahead. and you, said something along the lines of “whys it so hard? just say ‘hey I wanna switch weekends.’ and be done” and I told you, that it's not that simple, because of the custody papers and agreements and yadda yadda yadda. and you proceded to say, “ Sydnie, (purposefully using my birth name) you make everything so much more difficult then it needs to be. you make your life sound so hard. it doesn't help that you wanna be so special with your gender and sexuality.” when you said this, I was hurt. you've never said anything like that before. and I was surprised. you were probably having a bad day, which isn't that uncommon cause, you get pissed of by idiots in your first hour and I usually make things better in the second hour.

and because it was all I could think off. I said to you. “ you wouldn't understand, cause your parents are together.”  then the bell rang. “why does that matter.” and you walked out, without me for the first time ever. but I have more to say. and I’m again going to start it with.

                                 you don't understand.

you don't understand cause you don't have to deal with it. 

and because you don't have to deal with it. you don't have to worry.

you don't have to deal with your parents being in two different houses. 

you don't have to deal with there only interaction being them yelling 98% of the time. 

you don't have to be the middle man, cause you know they'll fight if you aren't.

you don't have to deal with the aching pain of knowing that, you might be the reason your parents divorced when you were 4. 

you don't have to worry about your stepdad coming in your room to yell at you for no reason. 

you don't have to be compared to your older brother on a daily basis

you don't have to deal with sitting in your room just so you don't get compared to your dad by your stepdad with false information.

you don't have to plan weekends with your dad just so you can see him for a weekend and only see him for half of it, because he has to work double overtime just to barely make due on child support.

you don't have to watch your dad silently cry in the car every visit just cause your brother refuses to talk to him, just cause your stepdad has money and he doesn’t.

you don't have to listen to your dad fight with your stepmom because he wants to get his son a birthday present but you stepmom doesn't want him to cause they can barely afford groceries, and he hasn't been there in 6 years so why bother.

you don't have to leave your moms house crying on Christmas almost every year cause your brother is an asshole and yells at you for saying something about your dad, but won't even say Merry Christmas to him, even though he gives him a card with $50-$100 that he’d been saving for MONTHS using quarters and spare $1′s he finds and stashes in his truck without his wife knowing.

you don't have to be afraid to shower for weeks at a time because you'd rather die than have to see your self naked in a mirror.

you don't have to be afraid that your parents will kick you out if they find out your trans. 

you don't have to ask teachers to call you a name other then what's on the roster.

you don't have to stand there and explain for 3 minutes why your preferred name is so different than your name on the roster. 

you don't have to remind yourself to use the girl's bathroom even though your feet wanna take you into the boys. 

you don't have to live in fear of coming out to your dad, because you might break his heart, and possibly cause ANOTHER heart attack that could actually kill him.

you don't have to constantly remind people you've known since before you came out that you don't use your birth name anymore, but they still use it cause, who cares your still technically a girl right? 

you don't have to worry about finding a person to date, just cause you don't look your gender.

you don't have to watch as someone you are in love with that you've been flirting with for months, gets a boyfriend because they aren't into women, forget your trans, and thinks your flirting is just platonic compliments.

you don't have to feel horrible, just cause you really wish that you’d get breast cancer so that you can get surgery without having to come out to your transphobic family.

you don't have to sit and listen as your grandfather who loves you to death states that he would shoot a trans person, unknowing that your one of those people. 

you don't sit awake at night and cry because you would give anything to either die in your sleep or magically wake up as a guy.

you don't have to switch the pronouns in stories just so you don't out your gay friend and get banned from talking to him.

you don't have to deal with falling asleep for 10 hours but only getting 3 hours of sleep because of insomnia making you toss and turn all night and have nightmares you can't even remember that keep you from actually sleeping.

you don't have to listen to voices in your head make fun of you cause you think people care for you. 

you don't have to fear for the next relapse, that drives you to hurt yourself again

you don't have to listen to people make light-hearted jokes about your weight, that actually hurt, because of your mind there true. 

you don't have to sit and listen to voices as they say you're worthless and hopeless.

you don't have to deal with depression that you've had since you were 5 and realized daddy was never coming home again.

you don't have to listen as all of your family, even your sister who knows you've tried to kill yourself tells you that you're being dramatic and don't have depression and are just looking for attention.

you don't have to (non-religiously) pray that you see your best friend at random points in the day, cause their touch is the only thing that makes the voices shut up for a few minutes at a time. 

you don't have to deal with hoping that you get hit by a car, just so that the pain of living finally stops.

you don't have to deal with the thought process of, you don't want your life to end, you just want the pain to stop, and death may be the only way.

you don't have to deal with divorced parents, gender dysphoria, depression, insomnia, anxiety, and shit like I do. yes, you deal with your own problems, but please don't downplay mine as “making my life hard cause I want to.” if I had the choice I wouldn't have a fucking life at all. 

so please, stop downplaying my struggles, I'm not saying they're the worst in the world, but there what I deal with, I don't downplay yours, I always listen to you and treat your issues the way they should be treated so, do the same for me.

               But even after this, if you ever saw it, you'd still                              never understand, why would you? you don't care enough.

Yeah so that's it, I'm done ranting now and I cried a couple times while writing this....... but yeah, that was meant for one person but whoever reads this can use it to learn about me so.... have fun with this info 

[saddlepunk]

More stuff about paint brushes/potions

Thinkin about paintbrushes and potions again bc i never really clarified much about them in my big ramble post. I think ive settled on them being like... a relatively new kind of magic, as far as the history of the world goes. Of course there were always ways of changing color and species, but its only within the last century or so that people started trying to commercialize it. The setting im putting my neo-kids in is a kind of paintbrush prohibition. These things were legal at the onset, but after everyone realized how dangerous they were there was a huge ban enacted. Of course, people being people (or neo-people, as the case may be), there's a lot of big underground circles dedicated to selling and using this stuff, and there are like... differences between them that affect a lot of the laws around them.

Theyre mostly the same magic, and theyre both incredibly unstable and can cause some serious problems if theyre used too frequently. The main difference is that the magic used in the "paint" is marginally less potent, since its geared just towards changing whatever genetic bits govern color and not like... species. By applying it to the skin rather than ingesting it there's a little more control over the dosage, plus only using part of a paintbrush won't fuck you up entirely. It's still illegal because like... there's way too many unknown side effects and if theyre used too frequently they can still absolutely spawn a mutant neopian, but its not something that can totally ruin a person's life. Rich assholes who can wave away fines and jail time will probably change their whole coloration every few years to match the hottest trends and its super shitty but that's how it goes.

Potions, on the other hand, are some seriously dangerous stuff. Since its usually changing color and species, the dosage has to be way more precise. Folks in the business of making morphing potions don't usually have a whole lot of them just laying around, since they have to make each potion specifically based on the weight/species of the person ordering one. Of course less scrupulous sellers will dole out whatever they've got without any care for the consequences, and buyers who either dont know or dont care will chug them down just the same.

Only drinking part of a potion is Seriously Ill Advised. While having a mottled paintbrush coat is neat, being trapped in the halfway point of a transformation between species is not. Even going back and finishing the remainder of the potion after its started doing its thing won't guarantee that the shift can be completed properly, since its no longer working with the same species/weight specifications for which it was brewed, and is essentially starting the process over, except... it's still only half a potion, so you're likely to end up even more fucked up. Even more likely: drinking only half the potion and being trapped between forms will probably leave your organs caught too, and whatever's going on in there won't be able to actually sustain life in any form. That kind of thing can happen anyways, since like... changing like that hurts. We're on some animorphs shit here. Folks without the right mental and physical constitution might die even if everything else was done right.

So, for obvious reasons, potions are a little more strictly managed. If a celebrity shows up for their new movie role with a shiny new coat, everyone can pretend its fur dye and look the other way. If they show up with a shiny new set of scales... that's a little harder to explain.

[thetwitchylife]

hey i'm trying to write a story about a character with epilepsy. i'm not epileptic so i'm trying really hard to make his (partial) seizures accurate but i also don't want to romanticize them. what are some first hand experiences w partial seizures/can you have more than one type of seizure/how would you want epilepsy to be presented in a book? ik that's a lot of questions but i want it to be accurate and not make the character a charity case. would writing an epileptic character be overstepping?

I’m delighted to get this question!  Getting info from folks who deal with epilepsy is exactly what authors should do.  Go you!

Advice #0.  DO NOT KILL THE EPILEPTIC CHARACTER.  FOR ANY REASON.  JUST DON’T.

1. Partial seizures describe a huge range of sensations and actions, so you can probably pick about four kinds of seizures that happen to your character. 

-Most folks have many kinds of seizures (like me) but putting the full range and variety of simple or complex partial seizures might be too much.  Check out the resources at the bottom of the page for more range.

-Realize that where the seizures originate will affect what kinds of seizures they have.  I don’t know enough about the brain to tell you what kinds of seizures come from what part of the brain, though.  Not a neurologist.  Go find one, and ask them!

2. If it were up to me, I’d see epilepsy treated kind of like its own character. A character has quirks and needs and an origin story, and they interact with other characters. Think about:

-When did epilepsy come into your protag’s life?  Were they born with it?  How much does it interfere with their daily actions?

- Where did it come from?  Was it the result of an illness, or a traumatic brain injury, or was it idiopathic (they don’t know, and probably never will know, where it came from)?  There’s a lot of anger and blame associated with each kind- whoever caused the TBI, whatever caused (or didn’t prevent) the illness, or directionless anger/self-loathing for idiopathic epilepsy.

-Is it controlled by medication, partially or completely?  A huge number of people never get their seizures completely under control, even with medication, implants, surgery, diet, acupuncture, or anything else they try.  But even when it’s controlled fully, epilepsy interferes with someone’s life.

-How many people know about this character’s epilepsy?  For a lot of folks, epilepsy holds a shit-ton of shame.  People with epilepsy used to be forcibly sterilized.  Epileptics were banned from marriage in Missouri until 1980.  How would you feel, knowing that people like you were considered a social danger?

-Is the character conscious during their seizures, or not?  Do they have any warning before their seizures?  (Realize that “auras” are often not just floating lights- they could be a flash of fear or nausea, or smelling gasoline/cat pee, or tingly finger, whatever, and not everyone has them.)

-Do they know anyone with epilepsy? Do they have any friends post-diagnosis? Epilepsy is fucking ISOLATING, especially because you can’t drive to see friends who live outside of walking/bicycling distance, and people can get real jumpy around you.

3. Stuff that has bugged me about books that have had epileptic characters, that hopefully you can avoid, has been:

-Not having the daily stuff mentioned- taking meds, or freaking out because you forgot them, or dealing with insurance, etc.

-Not realizing how important your doctor/neurologist is in your life. If you have a good one, you KEEP them. I have a long-standing relationship with my neuro.  She’s part-therapist, part-doctor, because for years I didn’t know anyone else with epilepsy, and she was the only person I could talk to about it.  (Family gets very distressed when I talk about SUDEP.)

-Glossing over how complex meds are.  Maybe they work, maybe they don’t.  Maybe your med levels fluctuate during the day/month, maybe they interact with diet or stress or sleep.  Just changing your meds takes over a month, and it’s the most stressful thing.  Nobody likes it.

-Making this about “God’s grace” or something.  Don’t even.  If I have epilepsy, and we’re talking about the Christin God, then God gave me these seizures.  Praying for God to take away my seizures is basically telling them that they screwed up.  Rude.  I tend to smile and nod when people tell me they’ll pray for me, then add their name to an internal list of “Morons to Avoid.”

-KILLING THE CHARACTER FOR THE ABLED CHARACTER TO GROW AS A PERSON.  DO NOT- I REPEAT DO NOT- KILL THE EPILEPTIC CHARACTER.

4.  Writing a character with epilepsy would not be overstepping.  It would be a breath of fresh air- we have so few stories that include us, especially ones where we live through until the end, and dear god I live for those stories.

5. There are two kinds of partial seizures: simple partial and complex partial.

Simple partial seizures are seizures where your character is aware of what’s around them.

Complex partial seizures are when your character loses consciousness.  Not convulsing or dropping to the floor, just blanked out.

Many people (like me) have both types.  In fact, I’ll usually have several simple partial seizures mixed with complex partial seizures.

My usual complex partial seizure is:

-I lose consciousness.  A few seconds later I regain consciousness, and my body is in roughly the same position, but during the seizure my body slumps down.  This is usually fine, but is hazardous while crossing the road, cooking, or carrying something delicate.  It comes with no warning.

-If I’m walking, then I keep walking, or I (semi-voluntarily) sit down.  I generally lose consciousness halfway to the ground.  I take my time standing up, because I feel very muzzy.

-When it’s a stronger seizure, I might wet myself.  Wicked embarrassing, but the right combination of meds can stop it from happening.  (It’s been months!)

-Afterwards I’m muzzy/foggy, cannot understand spoken language or speak, and have lost track of what I was doing before.  After a few seconds/minutes, it comes back.

-Every time I seize, I kick my right leg.  I didn’t know this until my roommate told me they’d noticed a “tell.”

My simple partials tend to be:

-I lose the ability to speak, lose facial expression, and open my mouth while blinking/closing my eyes.  Sometimes I can raise on hand to give the “hold on a minute” gesture.  I’ve been told that I look like I’m in pain- I’m not.  It’s just muscular contractions.

-My vision just cuts out- I can’t see anything, and I feel confused and muzzy.  When I see things again I’m clear enough to know that I’ve seized and tell folks that I’m fine, I just had a seizure.

-HUGE dizzy spells.  Like, grab on to the wall and close your eyes.  (I used to have these in college, it was intense.  I’m on better meds now.)

Keep in mind: All of these vary in intensity and length.  I might blank out for a millisecond, so the person I’m talking to doesn’t even notice.  (Happened with my neurologist once.)  I also might lose my awareness of anything outside my body for a full 30 seconds.

Also keep in mind: this is just me, one person.  My seizures are all language-centric  (The first thing to go is ALWAYS the ability to understand spoken language) because my seizures come from the part of my brain that controls language.  (One area in the left Temporal lobe.)

Talk to other people.  See what their epilepsy is like.  What traits fit your narrative needs?  And above all, DO NOT KILL THE TWITCHER.

And when it’s finished, tell us who you are so we can all read it!  I’d totally read Supernatural Fanfic if it included an epileptic character, and I’d extra-read an original novel.  

Resources: http://www.epilepsy.com/article/2016/12/2017-revised-classification-seizures

http://www.epilepsy.com/learn/types-seizures/simple-partial-seizures

http://www.epilepsy.com/learn/types-seizures/complex-partial-seizures

http://www.who.int/mediacentre/factsheets/fs999/en/