#its not bad but like...... she Never Played it Before and i kinda understand why my dad stopped her lmao
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Let's talk about Octavia
With the newest helluvaboss episode out and season two cming to an end there was a lot of discussion about Octavio even before the epsiode dropped. That's why i decided to look at her a little more in depth. Spoiler ahead (duh)
My realtionship with Octavia is kinda rookie. I love this asexual queen as much as her dad but find myself a little annoyed at her behaviour sometimes. Let's recap what we know about her.
Octavia is a royal teen, deeply loved by her father, troubled by the divorce of her parents and 17 years old. But if we look past the more obvious characteristics there is a lot going on in subtext.
Octavia is oblivious: Octavia grew up quite sheltered and as much as it is understanable (since they tried to assissinate stolas at loo loo land) that she is well protected the problem is that she has little to no clue about the outside world. Much like her father in the recent episode she is seen being scared of the world in seeing stars. She is THAT unaware that she was walking around without a disguise in broad daylight.
Octavia loves her father: So you might ask where the problem is for that point. She sees Stolas as JUST her father. She fails to see Stolas as a person with needs, wants, dreams and wishes. We have to point out that Octavia is never seen with any other people despite her parents (not counting loona in seeing stars). So it's save To assume that she is quite isolated and ultimately fixated to on her parents.
Octavia lacks comparission: As we grow up we compare. We always do. It helps us to decern right from wrong. The outside world helps us contextualize. Octavia probably never had that. Growing up with mostly her parents she has no other love relationships to look at and compare. Therefore she might not see Stella as an evil person like we do. For us the audiance it is hard to understand why she always puts her mother next to her while talking to Stolas and about the broken "family". But forOctavia Stella is an integral part of her life. (As a mother should be) She has no chance to see the behaviour of her mother as toxic and harmful, because that is how her mother ALWAYS was. Its the only thing Via knows. She cant understand why her father was "fine" with the antics of her mother until a certain point and "suddenly" isnt anymore.
Octavia is a child: That point kinda put me at odds a long time. My parents divorced when i was 12 and I could understand the situation better than her. Octavia is nearly an adult. Most children her age don't want to be that close to their parents, they want to be free, start their own live. Octavia doesn't. She clings to memories, to promises her father made to her and she just feel so so SO young. She tries to be that edgy teen but she feels way more like a child. Which isnt exactly bad but plays a huge part in her character.
Octavia and Stolas
The relationship of father and daugther hit a fallout and it was important that it happened because both characters need to GROW up.
While Stolas never had the chance to grow into his very own charcater due to the fact that his life was planned out for him, he tried to shelter Via from the same fate by protecting her and sacrificing for her. He did basically the other extreme of what he experienced.
Stolas slowly grows into himself, making decisions for himself and realizes that while having the freedom to make decisions for yourself is great, the consequences are yours to bear too. And he just realized how overwhelming these consequences can be in the recent epsiode.
Via on the other hand still needs to grow up. The fallout with her father is over due because stolas isnt JUST her father. She tries to remind him of his role on every step he takes further to himself - his true self.
Octavia needs to finally learn about the world, how healthy relationships look like, and what her father truly did for her. Right now she is angry and dissapointed and from her perspective she has every right to be but she lacks the understanding for her own father. It shows how little she truly knows about the relationship of her parents. She need to question why her father took pills rather than judging him for it. She needs to ask why her mother is so degrading towards him rather than accepting it as a given. She needs to see the true intentions of her uncle and mother rather than overlooking it.
and there clearly is hope. She protected her dad, still called him dad and i belive that if both of them grow and want to mame an effort it can work out. If Via learns more about her parents and the world - if she manages to grow up both father and daughter can grow into a healthy relationship. And if it takes a bruning bridge for now, than so be it but I'm certain that they will find each other again sooner or later.
#helluva boss#stolas goetia#helluva stolas#sinsmas#octavia#helluva boss analysis#helluva boss sinsmas#helluvaboss stolas#helluvaboss octavia
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⋆. 𐙚 ˚ Busy schedule ! . . . ( 西村力 )
— pairing: 西村力 x reader — contains: angst, readers a lonely clingy loser, mean ki, fluff — now playing: 一子青葉
"She became a victim of my busy schedule though, and I know that it's not fair that don't mean that I don't care."
Riki was always busy. He had a bunch of extracurriculars he did for school on top of dance, so you never really got the chance to see him anymore.
He'd always apologize, saying he knew it sucked never getting any of his attention but in the end, nothing ever changed. He was still busy and you still rode the train home alone every day.
Riding the train by yourself wasn't a new concept, lonely yeah but you got used to it eventually.
People on the train were usually either elders coming home from work or students huddling in groups of themselves, and it sounds depressing but beyond Riki, you didn't really have friends, which was okay. Until Riki joined a bunch of extracurriculars beyond his daily dance practice, which left him no time for you.
And it's bad to think about but the thought eventually got a hold of you and you started wondering if Riki enjoyed not being around you as often. You were clingy so it was understandable wanting some space from you, it still made you upset to think about though.
This thought alone has caused you to distance yourself from Riki subconsciously, which despite how busy he is he noticed because you're still his girlfriend after all.
-
The train was often packed with teenagers on the way home, you'd think you'd bump into someone and make friends for once but not once has it happened. You've begun to lose hope in talking to people.
Sure you could strike up a conversation but that's terrifying so you choose not to, which is probably one of the reasons you don't have any friends. How you started knowing Riki on the other hand was a grace from god.
In middle school, Riki came up to you rather then the other way around and asked to be friend's.
Spacing out on the train, thinking to yourself made you realize just how lonely you were when he was he wasn't around. Considering he's been your only friend since you guys were 12, being 18 in high school now. You've become slightly dependent on him, and it's another thing you've added to the long list of your lonely life.
Long lost in thought you feel a head hit your shoulder, you jump slightly cause it startled you but when you look to your right its a boy. Probably fell asleep, why else would he put his head on a stranger's shoulder.
Your body tensed up a bit, it was kinda hard to not be tense with someone resting on you.
You wanted to wake him and ask him to move but disrupting him wasn't in your best interest so you left him alone. On the plus side his hair smelled really nice.
-
The train came to an abrupt stop which shook the boy awake
Realizing he had fallen asleep on a stranger, he stood up and started apologizing profusely like a scolded child.
You followed in his steps and stood up, letting out shaky reassurance and telling him not to worry about it. It was overwhelming with people around looking at the two of you but eventually, he calmed down and explained himself "I really didn't mean to fall asleep on you like that, let me make it up to you!"
He was enthusiastic and energetic, especially for someone who was just freaking out.
"Oh oh no need! Really it's not a big deal." Still shaky you tried to convince him he was blowing it out of proportion. He wasn't taking no for an answer and he even managed to get your number so he could apologize more properly later.
After that he said goodbye and ran off the train, leaving you dumbfounded. You kind of just spaced out the rest of the way home, the whole situation was so dumb it was kind of funny.
So funny you wanted to tell Riki which you planned to do when you guys called tonight, you guys always called sometime before bed.
It was a point he made. No matter how busy he was and how little time he had for you, he'd always call.
You laid in bed waiting, and waiting, and waiting.
12am and no call. You weren't mad at him, you understood he couldn't always be there but you thought some notice would've been nice, instead of just laying there for hours on your phone.
Time passed and you gave up on waiting for a call. You placed your phone on your nightstand and got in bed.
Your mind started to wander, what was he doing that was so important? All of his activities end before 5 so why couldn't he call you? Was he okay? Was it a family thing? Did you do something?
In the midst of thinking you fell asleep.
-
In English the next day, during break time. It was your 4th period and Riki had yet to even mutter a word to you. As time passed, it was getting more upsetting and even more nerve-wracking.
You scanned over everything that's happened the past few days and you couldn't think of anything you've done.
You looked back at Riki to see him sitting at his desk analyzing his work, but you turned back around when you got a text.
Some random number that you didn't have saved.
"You're in English rn right?" The text creeped you out a bit, so you pressed to know who it was "Oh shit sorry! Just realizing I never gave you my name yesterday! It's Akio from the train. I wanted to come say hi if you were in English :)" Knowing it was him made it sorta less creepy feeling, he was still technically a stranger though.
You hesitated on replying but gave in "Ohh right haha, yeah I'm in English"
He liked the message but didn't actually say anything back.
Eventually, he came swinging in loudly with a booming "HI" as soon as he opened the door. It shocked not only you but everyone.
Riki who was staring at the boy in confusion.
Riki's eyebrows furrowed even more as he saw the boy walk up to you and hug you like you'd known him forever, slightly glaring at the boy. He sit's down in the chair next to you "What class do you have next?" His voice still much too loud for the atmosphere, the girl next to us shushed him, in which he apologized quietly and turned back to you.
"Uh math." You said quietly, shaken up by the boys incredibly friendly demeanor.
The boy started rambling on about how that was his next class too and how it's surprising you guys hadn't become friends sooner, all while you look back at Riki to see him still eyeing the boy down.
Riki got easily jealous, and he was possessive, but this looked more like confusion and annoyance then anything.
While on the other hand luckily for you the boy tended to talk more then he listened which was good as you were still too nervous to talk to him like a normal person.
Once Riki realized you weren't all that invested in what the boy had to say he finally took his eyes off of the boy and returned to his work.
After what felt like forever of Akio rambling and you silently smiling and nodding, it was time for Math.
Besides Math and English, you and the boy didn't have any other classes together, so the rest of the day went as normal, besides the fact that Riki seemed busier than usual and wasn't talking to you.
But the way home from school was different.
On the train ride home, you were walking to sit where you usually do when a familiar voice started to yell for you, you turned around, and it was Akio.
He grabbed your wrist and pulled you to a seat, exclaiming that now you had someone to ride the train with. Before you could get a word in, he continued, once again going on about anything and everything.
He was a bit over the top for you, but you had to admit, he was nice, and the company was nice too.
-
The train came to a stop, and you said your goodbyes, he offered to walk you home, but you declined. You told him you lived a bit from the station, and he left it at that. Getting home you got into some comfy clothes and passed out.
Asleep for about an hour and a half, you were awoken by a text from Riki
All it read was "I'm coming over" Don't get me wrong you were excited he was coming over; this was the first time in a while, but you were still upset with him for not only not calling you but also ignoring you all day. So you just texted back a simple "ok" and started your homework while waiting for him to arrive.
He didn't live very far so it didn't take long, as soon as he got there, he plopped on your bed and gave you a look.
You asked him what it was for, and he stayed silent for a few seconds followed by a contemplating hum, "Who was he? The guy in English that was acting all buddy-buddy with you?" He said it so calmly as if he didn't care if he got an answer.
"Ohh I met him on the train" You turned back to the homework on your desk "He fell asleep on me and asked for my number so he could apologize later!" his brows furrowed and his eyes creased a bit, "Seriously?"
You nodded and he continued "He gave you his number so he could 'apologize later'?" You again nodded at his very sarcastic question.
His tongue played with the inside of his cheek "Has he apologized yet?" He sounded almost annoyed
You chuckled nervously, his gaze was strong and intimidating.
"No, not yet.." He let out a 'psh' sound, he was clearly annoyed but not with you. More so with the situation. "He gave you his number cause he thought you were cute. Not cause he wanted to apologize." His voice was deeper
You didn't believe it so you rebutted "That's not true ki, I'm sure he'll apologize soon!" He continued to look at you, almost like he was trying to analyze what you were thinking. "Block him" He sits up on your bed
"What??"
He repeats himself "Block him"
"Why Riki."
"Are you dumb? He clearly doesn't want to just apologize. Does he know you have a boyfriend?" He started to sound angry, almost a little sad sounding. "How do you know that? You've never met him."
"I've met guys like him and you didn't answer my question, does he know you have a boyfriend? Me? Does he know you have me?"
You opened your mouth but nothing came out for a second, "I don't know? I mean I didn't mention it" Before you can finish, he tsk's and looks away "But the only reason I didn't mention it was cause he didn't ask Riki. I really don't think he's trying to get with me."
He ignored you "What's so good about him anyway?" He was starting to get fed up "He's nice Riki. I mean he made time to see me in English today despite being busy himself." You emphasized the 'made time to see me' part which Riki took as a jab.
You didn't necessarily mean it as one but you were tired of never seeing your boyfriend and so it just kinda came out. "You know I try to make time for you." Instead of sounding annoyed, he sounded genuinely hurt and tired, he looked down a bit as he continued "And I know that you don't really have friends besides me but you shouldn't befriend the first person that talks to you." He gets off your bed and heads to the door, "It's stupid and pathetic." He finishes before he shuts the door, harder than he should have.
His voice was laced with venom, almost like the sadness from before completely desecrated. And it left you dumbfounded too.
You weren't one to cry, you didn't cry about anything.
Not that you couldn't, but you made a point not to. It's pathetic and embarrassing, but despite that, you felt your eyes well up. You wiped them before anything could come out and decided to head to bed early. Couldn't cry if you weren't awake!
Granted it took forever to get to sleep, but you kept replaying what Riki said non-stop. 'Stupid and pathetic' weren't new words to you, but when they came out of Riki's mouth they felt a million times worse.
-
Going to School was dreadful, more than before.
Riki was avoiding you and so you were avoiding him back. You continued to hang out with Akio, it probably wasn't the best idea but you rather hang out with someone Riki doesn't like than be lonely again.
A whole week of this pettiness has gone by, nightly phone calls have stopped, goodnight and good morning texts, walking you to and from school whenever he had the chance, all of it stopped.
You know you shouldn't totally blame Ki, it wasn't completely his fault. You said some mean stuff too, but you couldn't help but be so angry at him despite it all.
Of course, you guys have gotten into arguments, and of course, with those arguments came insults but he'd never said something so cruel to you, something you confided in him he used against you, which hurt the most.
Everything was too much to think about so you dove into your studies, more than you already were. Not only studies but other things too, anything to get your mind off of it. Throwing yourself into things isn't a new concept for you, you did it whenever you got overly anxious. It would cause you to eat less, go outside less, and socialize even less than you usually do. Now the difference between then and now is you'd usually have Riki to make you feel better, but you don't so sitting in your dark room all day will continue.
Riki on the other hand, doesn't know what he's feeling. Though he's noticed you not taking care of yourself properly which is making him feel crazy guilty, he knows it's because of him.
Riki's so mad at you for choosing some other guy but he feels so bad for the things he said.
He didn't mean it, he knew you knew that, at least he hoped.
He just wanted to apologize and make it all better but he couldn't. His pride mixed with not having a lot of time made it hard to talk to you so he just didn't bother. Plus he wanted to truly work out what he was going to say before he attempted to talk to you.
He'd catch your eyes in every class, in the lunchroom, in the auditorium, everywhere. He wanted to see your face, he wanted to see you and hold you but he just couldn't let himself be vulnerable and admit he misses you. He's hoping you'd do that but you were just as 'non-vulnerable' as he was, maybe even more.
Which meant he'd either have to make it up to you or lose you over some random boy you met a few weeks ago. Luckily for you, he's sickly in love with you whether he'd admit it or not so he chose the former.
-
It wasn't spontaneous, Riki thought it over.
He planned when it would happen, how it would happen, where it would happen, and what he thought the outcome would be. He wanted to start it all off by making sure to spend the whole day with you.
So he went to your house before school, he loved walking you to school but he rarely got to do it since he had to be at school so early. But the way you get all giddy when you see him at the door makes him happy so he canceled morning activities to walk you.
Seeing him at the door was a little surprising, especially cause he didn't knock, you opened it before he could and the walk to school was uneventful. Silent, but not awkward.
Riki didn't try to hold your hand. He didn't want to make you upset by acting like nothing was wrong, but when passing by a little shop he grabbed your wrist and pulled you inside.
At the rate you two were going you would've been early to school, and he saw something in the window he knows you've been eyeing so why not.
He didn't say anything as he pulled you through the shop up to where the display was.
A large stand with matching phone charms.
It was a niche interest you had, and you had tons of them at home but the thing about these ones is that they're matching.
Two long chains, decorated with beads that had small charms on the end. One with black beads and a white star on the end, the other with white beads and a black star on the end.
Riki knew you had been looking at them for a while, thinking it was cute considering his favorite color is black and yours is white.
He found matching things cute, he found it even cuter when you'd get a tint of rose on your cheeks and try to hide your smile as you showed him a new piece of matching items you bought for the two of you.
He thought about this as he walked to the register, making his own cheeks turn a slight shade of pink as he looked at you. You weren't looking at him but it didn't go unnoticed.
Walking out of the store, chains in hand, without letting go of your wrist Riki asks for your phone and puts the charm on.
He does the same for his phone and then holds them up together in his hand to show them off.
You tried to act non-cholent but your dumb little smile made its way onto your face and made Riki smile even harder as he handed you your phone back, and you guys continued walking.
You hated your smile. You felt it was too... cheeky. Too wide, and it made your cheeks all big.
But Riki adored it. The way your eyes would light up and close a little every time something made you happy, or how you'd cover your mouth if you felt you were smiling too much, just for him to pull your hand down and hold it in his. He loved your smile, he always looked for it everywhere he was, he especially loved it when it was he who was the one causing it.
He knew he couldn't always be the reason you were smiling but as long as you were happy it didn't matter to him.
He kept on glancing at you just to see you smiling and looking at the phone charm, you saw him doing it but didn't say anything. You thought it was cute how cheesy he acted when he thought no one was looking.
-
The rest of the school day was normal for the most part; the assigned seats of each class were fumbling with Riki's plans to be by your side all day, which he knew would happen.
Tables in your class were set in pairs of two, you were at the front of the class seated with a girl you barely knew and Riki was a few seats behind.
As break time started, Riki used his height to his advantage and threw a piece of paper above the guy in front of him and it landed perfectly on your desk. You looked back to see who it was, despite already knowing. You gave him a small smile which made him melt, and as you opened it you saw two stick figures holding hands in a flower field.
It was cheesy, yeah but it was cute. Cuter coming from Riki as he wasn't one for cutesy things.
He would write cute little notes and letters to stick in your locker but that was rare, so this act made you blush so bad you had to hide your face slightly.
You went to draw a cute photo back but before you could even get your pen out Akio spotted you and caught your attention.
Riki tried to ignore it, he didn't like the guy yeah but he also knew he was your first friend besides himself so he wanted to attempt to become friends with him for your sake.
Looking at Akio you saw Riki come up behind him. They had never stood side by side so you never realized how much taller Riki was in comparison and it shocked Akio too as he let out a child-like yelp when he turned around and saw Riki behind him.
You could tell Akio put his guard up a little.
-
During Riki and your petty silent treatment towards each other, you talked to Akio about how you were dating Riki and that you still wanted to be his friend but there needed to be a bit of distance.
He took it really well which was lucky for you as you had a hard time confronting people.
-
Akio backed up a little from Riki who was giving him a slightly annoyed-confused look, and bumped into your desk.
He wasn't scared of Riki per se, but Riki was intimidating. Tall, broad, cold stare, etc.
But in the moment of silence, Riki begrudgingly introduced himself.
Akio stood up a bit and introduced himself back, voice kinda shaky which made Riki chuckle. Akio, who has proved himself to make friends easily, quickly got comfortable with Riki and started talking about anything and everything.
As the conversation went on, Riki took the seat next to you as the girl had left a bit ago.
Riki grabbed your hand under the table, another thing he didn't often do as PDA wasn't something he enjoyed.
Eventually, the break was over, and it was time for the next class.
Akio said his goodbyes and ran off, Riki on the other hand wanted to walk you to your next class.
Walking to class, Riki had yet to let go of your hand, rubbing his thumb back and forth here and there.
And luckily the class was on the other side of the building which left you guys some time to talk, or more specifically some time for him to apologize.
He looked over at you almost nervously and squeezed your hand the tiniest bit before starting.
"I didn't mean it." He wasn't the greatest at starting apologies or apologizing in general, and although you were pretty sure you knew what he was talking about, you still asked. "Didn't mean what?"
He took a sharp breath in "When I said you were stupid and pathetic, just overall being a jerk..." he paused and looked at you before continuing.
"But that's not even all, I haven't been making any time for you, I was petty and ignored you, I got overly jealous and possessive, and I have just been a huge asshole." You were so focused on him apologizing that you hadn't even realized you guys weren't in the school building anymore, you were outside behind the school, in the small garden the school had created not too long ago.
"What are we doing out here?" You looked at him with confusion "I wanted to talk with you more privately."
"We're gonna get in trouble for skipping class, Ki."
"Don't worry about it, okay? I'll take all the blame." You looked at him, debating if you should stay out here or convince him to talk later but his eyes were almost pleading for you to stay out there, and so you listened. "Fine," you said with a slight smile.
He took a second to collect his thoughts and how he was going to go about this but eventually, he got it and started.
"I'm sorry I've left you alone so long. And I'm truly so sorry that I never made time for you, a busy schedule isn't an excuse to be distant, and I need to learn that."
"Rik-" You tried to cut him off and say it wasn't his fault but he didn't let you. "Wait just, wait okay." You shut up
"I care about you so much, you're truly the only one for me, and you mean the world to me. What I said during our fight was so fucked up, and I need you to know I didn't mean any of it. I want to be around you all the time, but I know I can't, and I'm glad you found someone you can be with when I'm not around.
I want you to know that I want to make all of this up to you. All the lost time, the phone calls I missed, the dates, just hanging out together, I want to make up for all of it. And I will, I promise.
I love you. A lot, and I'm gonna prove it this time. I'm going to be the best boyfriend you can ask for and I'm going to be your best friend again. Okay? I'm going to spend as much time as I possibly can with you. I love you so much. You don't have to forgive me now but I-"
"Riki." You successfully cut him off this time as he was starting to run out of breath and his cheeks were all pink.
He looks at you like a scolded puppy, catching his breath a little, Pure word vomit he thought.
"I love you too, so much. And I promise I'm not mad. It hurt never seeing you, yeah, and we definitely have distanced, ourselves as both a couple and friend but it's not your fault. You're busy and I understand okay?" He gave you an apologetic small smile before bringing you into a hug
It was warm and loving, just as all of Riki's hugs were.
He put his head into the crook of your neck, "I missed this so much" He mumbled, squeezing his arms around you tighter. "I'll do better. I promise." You smiled and softly caressed his hair. "I love you Ki."
"I love you too baby. So much."
-
Later throughout the day Riki walked you to every class, smiled at you whenever your eyes met, and was friendly with Akio whenever he came around.
After school, he came to your house and you guys just laid with each other. Something you hadn't done in ages, and although you knew he wouldn't be able to do this every day, you were just happy he was trying to make more time for you, and he was just happy to have his girlfriend back.
@ featki
Note: Sorry if the ending is bad or rushed, iv been working on this for like 2-3 weeks now and just wanted it out. But this is definitely my longest fic and I hope u guys like it :)) also I think I made Akio seem like a bigger character than he actually was... srry
#enhypen niki#enhypen riki#enhypen#nishimura riki#niki#riki x reader#riki angst#riki fluff#enhypen x reader#riki nishimura#nishimura riki x reader#riki nishimura x reader#niki nishimura#taiyaakii ⭑.ᐟ
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i very much enjoy the extremely scientific analysis of the naruto verse in which there are three genders, aka naruto, sasuke, and Woman.
AM I WRONG? AM I WRONG? pulls down projection screen and plays powerpoint
Obviously let's give room for nuance. A ton of Naruto characters don't fall into these gender norms. This does predominantly apply to the rampant proliferation of the three-person dynamics that were assigned by the government and dictate your entire life. And, like, society. It does not end. Gender isn't a biological factor in Naruto, it's a social dynamic constructed entirely by your homoerotic tension with other men. And there are so many.
Madara (S), Hashirama (N), Mito (W). Izuna (N) and Tobirama (S) - tragically, Izuna died before women could be invented. Sarutobi (N), Danzo (S, horrifically) - see above about women not being invented yet. Jiraiya (N), Orochimaru (S), Tsunade (W). Yahiko (N), Nagato (S), Konan (W). Obito (N), Kakashi (S), Rin (W). Shisui (N), Itachi (S), that little deeply unimportant girlfriend (W). Um, fucking, Naruto (N), Sasuke (S), Sakura (W). Even - even, fuckin, Rock Lee (N), Neiji (S), Tenten (W).
And what do they all have in common????
(OT3. They're all OT3s. Is what I'm saying).
There is some room for alternative gender expressions here, like being butch or femme. Naruto gender expressions: teacher, otouto, woman who you can't even tell is woman gendered because she has no backstory but you just have to kinda assume that she has a polycule-based backstory where she was Woman Gender. I feel almost as if 2/3rds of the Rookie 9 are liberated from this. InoShikaCho just doesn't fit (their chaotic cousin energy is just too strong and Ino's too much of a lesbian). Hinata's too busy being defined entirely by a different throuple's N to have codependent dynamics with her own N and S (and I'm hesitant to even say that, since I actually don't know if Kiba and Shino have a codependent rivalry - do they?).
I get, like, the reason for all of this. Curse of Hatred. Cycles. N and S Genders being sourced from demigods or something. Narrative parallelism. Sympathy points. It's not the bad guy's fault he's evil, his N and W gendered counterparts died :(. But an extremely strange side-effect of this is that all of the male characters are, like, Just Naruto or Just Sasuke. But the vast majority of the female characters are - like, completely defined by the men in their lives - but also they are more likely to be a unique person. Mito, Sakura, and Rin have actually nothing in common. Writing so sexist it creates more interesting characters?!?!
Unironically, this is why I'm always saying that Sasunaru is the ship of all time, nothing will ever top it, you will NEVER do it like Sasunaru, etc. Every important relationship in the series is meant to evoke Sasunaru. (Notably, none of the explicitly romantic ones. But we're beyond such paltry understandings of the most iconic pairing of all time as fundamentally based in romance. We're operating on a higher level than that). This unbroken chain of toxic yaoi has culminated at the end point of Sasunaru, and it exists to parallel Sasunaru and define their relationship by the dysfunction of generations of tragedy. That's why Naruto has to consciously break the cycle and free them from the generational hate - it was the only way to save Sasuke. This is also why I'm always saying that Sasunaru is the point of Naruto, and that the entirety of Naruto is about Sasunaru. Come back to me when your work has invented new genders in the all-encompassing pursuit of toxic yaoi.
This also means that the only truly gender non-conforming individuals in Naruto are its mightiest heterosexuals: Minato (W) and Kushina (N). Truly insane. The N/S/W configuration is the societal norm, it's bonkers to make a major good-aligned male character a wifeguy. By Naruto standards Minato and Kushina are the only queer couple.
#naruto#sasunaru#happy yaoi day everyone#my asks#i do have more serious thoughts about themes in fiction and how the best things ive consumed have extremely tight themes#to the point where the entire work is about 1 thing.#ya know like. sasunaru is to naruto what ecosystems are to dungeon meshi#its why dm is good. anyway thats more complicated thoughts not for joke sasunaru post#fwiw my MENTAL naruto is inosaku my IDEAL naruto is team7ot3. i dont explain my genius often.
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Look At Me⋅˚₊‧୨୧ ‧
>>contents: in which Sunghoon becomes jealous of his admirer, y/ns new friend
>>warnings: fluff, angst, kinda cliche romance
>>now playing: Look At Me - Twice
Everyone in the campus knows of y/ns crush on Sunghoon, its no surprise that she follows him everyday, gives him lunch which he never eats, tries to strike up a conversation which he never answers and so much more. The head over heels girl was so in love with the quiet popular boy that never considered her a choice
"Sunghoon, good morning!" Greeted y/n with a happy smile, after all it was always a good day when she meets sunghoon first thing in the morning
As always Sunghoon didnt answer anything, instead walking away from the interaction. leaving a disappointed but not suprised y/n to stand alone in the hallway
"i don't get why you still chase him y/n, hes such a cold guy that doesnt even appreciate what uve been doing to him for the past months" said Sana, y/ns best friend who saw her interaction with him
"Dont be like that! Maybe one day he would finally see me as a someone, i just need to have patience" said y/n enthusiasticly
Sana only sighed and shook her head before dragging y/n to class
After class finished, Sana, y/n along with Danielle and Hyein all went to the cafeteria to eat. As always y/n prepared sunghoons meal beforehand
The daily routine goes about how y/n would approach Sunghoon to give him his cooked meal only for Sunghoon to give a slight nod and later throwing it away
As y/n was about to approach the cold boy, Hyein stopped her. "I don't think you should do it today y/n. I heard he failed his history exam and is in a bad mood today"
"Nonsense! I do this everyday, im sure by now its a natural occurrence to him" said y/n stubbornly, Hyein can only sigh at the realization that her best friend was head over heels for the boy.
Y/n approached his table, there was him and his other popular friends. "Hi Sunghoon, here's ur meal" said y/n while giving Sunghoon a lunch box which she cooked before school
She didn't expect sunghoon to suddenly snap. "God y/n why can't you realize that i don't like you? Is that too much to comprehend for your stupid and stubborn head? Do you not realize that i never ate your lunch? Do u not realize that i would never like someone as low as you?" Said Sunghoon furiously.
Y/n felt her heart shattering at his words, sure Sunghoon never said thank you to her, but he never snapped at her especially in front of the cafeteria, where everyone was watching
Sunghoon continued to bash her and humiliate her infront of the cafeteria, y/n just stood there trying to hold back her tears, looking at the ground
Danielle and the rest quickly approached the commotion and pulled y/n to the girls bathroom to fix herself. All y/n did was cry, she didn't expect for Sunghoon to humiliate her for the entire school to see, all she can think was the revenge she wants. She wasn't sure of whats happening but she is sure about one thing, she doesn't like him anymore
They comforted her and walked her to her next period
"Listen up students, today we have a new student" said their teacher
"Hello, im Soobin. Please treat me well" said the new student whos name seems to be Soobin
Y/n wasn't paying attention though, she was still in shock about what happened at lunch earlier
"Soobin can sit next to y/n, y/n raise your hand" y/n heard that and raised her hand
"Hi, I'm Soobin" said soobin who saw the gloomy girl
"Hi im y/n" said y/n shortly, again still sad about what happened
Although it turns out, y/n and Soobin seems to have a click. They enjoy the same tv shows, has the same opinions, understands each other's humor, they instantly became close friends by the end of the lesson
The next day, Sunghoon didn't expect her to not greet him first thing in the morning, instead avoiding him. At first he was feeling good with this change, it was one thing off his plate and now he didn't have to be annoyed by another admirer
Y/n was having a good day, she spent time with Sana, Hyein, Danielle and Soobin. The people who appreciates her and loves her for who she is
At lunch time, Soobin and y/n ate at the cafeteria together. Sana and Hyein was busy studying for their history test in the library, while Danielle was practicing tennis at the school field. Which ultimately left them both together to get lunch
Y/n had so much fun, Soobin's jokes were making her mood so happy today.
Unbeknownst to her, Sunghoon who arrived at the cafeteria before her was staring at her, he was confused on why she didn't even greet him, nor did she give him lunch today
"Seems that uve got a staring problem, u like her or smth?" Jay jokingly asked
"No? Why would i like her? Im happy that she's finally not clingy to me anymore, i never liked her anyways" said Sunghoon. Y/n heard that sentence and she feels her heart shattering once again
"Don't say that, she put a lot of effort on ur lunch that u throw everyday, atleast give her some credit" Heeseung, Sunghoons friend said
"Yeah, if i had an admirer that put in that much effort i would be honored, besides she's quite cute" Said Sunoo, who in return received a glare from Sunghoon
"Hey do you know that guy? He keeps glaring at our direction since we've arrived" Said Soobin, pointing to the person not other than Sunghoon
"Hm? I don't know him, he is probably just spacing out" reasoned y/n while trying to drag soobin out of the cafeteria
Sunghoons deathly glare at both of them certainly was a shock to y/n, usually he never even looks at her even if she tries to talk to him, but she ultimately brushed that thought to her just being dramatic
This went on for weeks, Soobin and y/n became practically attached (platonically) and Sunghoon would always often stare at them the whole time
Sunghoon still wouldn't admit to anyone (even to himself) that he misses y/n, her talks, her lunch, and just her being clingy to him. Until one day he finally had enough
It was lunch break, as usual y/n along with her friendgroup was walking to the cafeteria to get some food, Sunghoon knew this and took the opertunity to approach y/n and her friends
"Y/n can i talk to u?" Asked Sunghoon who was still giving Soobin glares. Before y/n can answer Danielle did. "What do you want sunghoon, leave y/n alone she isn't bothering you anymore" said Danielle while the others agreed.
"No i promise it's not about that, can i just speak to y/n privately for a moment? It won't take long" Sunghoon tried to reason. Finally y/n said "Fine, you guys can go to the cafeteria first ill catch up later" said y/n
Once they were finally alone, Sunghoon immediately said "Why do you keep avoiding me these past few weeks? I thought u liked me" said Sunghoon
Y/n scoffed "How do you expect me to keep clinging on to u after what you said? Its true, u never appreciated my efforts. I should've listened to Sana" said y/n with a slight crack in her voice
"What about Soobin, what is with that guy and why are u guys suddenly close? Do you like him now?" Asked Sunghoon bitterly
"Don't bring Soobin in this conversation, you know very well that this is your fault, me and Soobin are just friends, but whatever we would be is none of your business. I thought u hated me anyways? What happend to u having one thing off ur plate?" Said y/n
"I didn't mean it i swear, i was in a bad mood. Im sorry, i genuinely miss all the things u usually do to me in the past, i don't like it when u look at anyone else, look at me" said Sunghoon with a slight pout
"it's okay, i forgive you. Besides i kinda miss making you lunch" y/n said half jokingly
"I promise ill change" said Sunghoon while kissing her forehead
Since that day, sunghoon and y/n ultimately started dating (against Sana, Hyein, and Danielles will)
💳: divider: @iluvrei & @chilumitos! Other pictures are from pinterest, credits to all the owners
A/N: feel free to send in a request xx
#enhypen#jungwon#enhypen angst#enhypen fluff#enhypen x reader#enhypen fanfiction#enhypen oneshots#yang jungwon#txt#enhypen scenarios#enhypen fanfic#enhypen au#enhypen imagines#park sunghoon x reader#sunghoon x reader#enhypen soft hours#enhypen oneshot#enhypen smau#enhypen drabbles#enhypen soft thoughts#enhypen headcannons#enha imagines#enha x reader#sunghoon imagines#sunghoon fluff
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ahhh I understand, I’m glad you replied to my request though! can you simply just make reader a childhood friend of Isagi but the scenario is that reader wants to have her first kiss with Isagi because she trusts him and secretly has a big crush on him?
✦ 𝐈𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮. (𝐅𝐭. 𝐘. 𝐈𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐢)
Syn: You need your first kiss according to your friends by you only trust one person
Pairings: Yoichi Isagi x Reader.
A/N: sorry about the rushed ending I already took farr too long to make this so yeah
This was one of the nights you would dream of, hanging out with your friends and doing things that you probably shouldn't but who gives a fuck really? The night was starting to get rather grey before one of your friends suggested truth or dare.
Overused? Sure. But it worked, the room was bustling with chatter before it was your turn.
"Truth or dare Y/N?"
You tilted your head to the side as in you were thinking hard about this simple choice.
"Hmmm, Truth"
"Okay! Whose the first boy you've kissed?"
Damn, She got you. The room was quiet and at first your friends got excited because they thought silence was thinking, as in you missed so many guys you can't remember. But no, it was stalling and it wasn't helping anything.
"I... I um, actually never kissed a dude before"
The room was quiet again before a loud surge basically shattered your ears. Things like "WHAT!? Y/N YOU'RE DROP DEAD GORGEOUS HOWWW" Or "That's a lie, you're not lying, right?" Or... "Ha. Loser" Just what you needed on an already exhausting night.
"I'm being serious! I just never really... Y'know..."
Two of your friends eyed you suspiciously before whispering amongst themselves.
"Okay, well Y/N if you were going to have your first kiss right now and you could pick anyone, who would it be with?".
There was another pause but this one seemed more acceptable. Your mind searched through all of its core memories to find a person who could fit the criteria for your first kiss. They have to have decent looks, a nice reputation and personality and basic love for you.
You could only think of one person that could meet all those standards. Your friend; Yoichi Isagi.
"Well I guess I would have to go with Yoichi Isagi, I mean he's stuck to my side for a few years."
Your friends quietly searched the memory for any sight or interaction with this kid.
"Ohhh you mean that kid on the soccer team?" One of your friends jumped up as they heard the origin of the mysterious kid.
"Oh! Yeah I remember now. He's a cute one" your other friend shouted out, clearly not caring who was in the room listening to her.
"Yeah, heh..." You say while subconsciously staring daggers at your friend.
"Y/N!!! Tell your friends that their parents are here!"
Everyone kinda heard themselves so they all emptied the room themselves. You waved goodbye to everyone and got ready to go to bed.
As the day started up again all you could think about was the events that transpired last night. It only got worse when you heard that sweet, sweet voice...
"Hey! Y/N! How you didn't think you could escape me for another second of the day, did you?"
No.... Of course not. I mean the huge soccer playing, all seeing menace definitely would've found me anyway with those eyes and that brain of his.
"Why have you been avoiding me? Is it because of that game? I know it was sorta, kinda, bad for me but at least we won"
"No, no it's not the game I.... I just had a huge night"
"wanna talk about it?"
"...Later" You say dismissively.
Gosh he was hot... Did he always look at you with that passion in his eyes? No! This is your Best friend! You can't do that to him... You don't like him you're being silly.... But he's so damn cute, such nice lips, such a nice smile.. and that feral smirk he gets on the field.
You were kinda nervous about talking to him later, even though it was just your friend Isagi, it didn't feel so innocent anymore especially when you have thoughts like this going through your head. It doesn't matter that much though... You'll just talk when you guys talk... Nothing will go.... Wrong?
"You like me Y/N!?" Isagi questioned with a red face that's seeking validation.
"w-what!? Where the hell did you learn that information!?"
"From Y/F"
Damn it, your friend, the one person you thought you could trust ratted you out. You swore that when you saw them again it was up.
"I... I...." You couldn't even form sentences, what the fuck!? Your friend just snitched on you!
"I also heard from a little birdie that you wanted a certain blue eyed guy with a passion for talking shit and making goals to fulfill the honor of giving you your first kiss."
"Damn, that bitch can't keep her mouth shut for shit!"
He laughs lightheartedly before grabbing your hands and bringing you closer to him. He brushes your hair from your face and that feral look and his eyes were replaced with something much more soft and tame.
"I like you too Y/N, so much in fact that I might just give you more than just a kiss that you've been so desperately seeking"
He shared that same warm smile before pulling you close by your waist and planting a warm kiss on your soft lips, you kinda just melted into him and he did the same, it became sloppy pretty fast. You guys didn't even see that anyone could've just walked by and saw you guys.
When you guys finally separated to catch your breath he leaned his forehead on yours and chuckled before grabbing your hand and pulling you into his arms.
"I've wanted to do that for a while... Also I won't forgive you for holding out on me" There's the Isagi you remember. He's still in there somewhere?
#bllk isagi#bllk x you#bllk x reader#bllk#yoichi isagi x reader#yoichi isagi#blue lock isagi#isagi x reader#isagi x you#isagi yoichi#Yoichi bllk#black reader
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SORRY, WRONG NUMBER
— sim jaeyun one-shot
GENRE: strangers to friends to lovers, crack fic kinda, you fell first, he fell harder.
PERM TAG LIST: @run2seob
you and your best friend, huh yunjin, were talking about past relationships. but, you never told her you’ve never been in a relationship. so, you tell her you have 1 past relationship.
the day after you receive a call about a shim hyeri, someone who isn't you.
the chatter between you and yunjin filled the room, “so you’re telling me, that he messed up a pick-up line?” you cackled when she gave you the nod of confirmation. you’d never been hit on, but you sure as hell wanted to be a fly on a wall to see that in real time.
yunjin stared at you, a serious look on her face, “so, let’s talk about you now.”
you froze, realizing she meant talking about your past relationships. you felt yourself gulp, having never been in a relationship before, you couldn’t answer. so, you decided to make one up! what could possibly go wrong?
“so,” your taller friend stared at you in disbelief, “the last time you dated someone was 3 years ago? before you met me?”
you simply nodded, trying to make her believe you, you couldn't let yunjin know you have no dating experience.
when she gave a shrug, you felt your face light up. hopefully this won't come to bite you in the ass, right?
the night went on with drinking, laughter, and just a joyous time altogether. yunjin didn't drink much, but you definitely drank over your limit.
“yunjin, i need to head to the restroom” she gave you a nod of understanding and you wobbily made your way there.
you tripped over your own foot and stumbled into a black-haired man, who was definitely your type, but all you could manage to get out, distracted by this man’s beauty, was a mumble of “sorry...”
what you didn’t realize is that your friend saw this whole ordeal.
“are you okay?” the man asked, helping you up, “now that i met y- i mean, y-yes!” your face flushed, thinking to yourself on why you said that. but then you heard a snicker, knowing all-too-well who it was coming from, yunjin.
when you woke up the next day, you had the worst hangover you’d ever experienced. “why did she let me drink so much...” you whined and fell back onto your pillow.
your phone’s ringtone went off, and you were confused as to who was calling so early. “hello?” your exhaustion showed through the phone's speaker, “excuse me? is this shim hyeri?” a deep voice came from the other end, “who?”
the male laughed a bit, “hyeri, i know you like to play games, but seriously..” the words left you confused. “i think you have the wrong number...?”
“what?” the male's voice was in disbelief, almost sounding sad. “are you okay?” you ask out of concern, “yeah..” his voice cracks, “’m fine.”
you sigh, “listen, i don't know what happened between you and this hyeri, but you definitely don't sound fine.” you emphasize on the word “fine”.
the other end of the line goes silent, as if he hung up, but you know he didn't because the call would've ended. “i thought she was into me, and the feeling was mutual, but i guess she wasn't.”
ah, one-sided love. you smile sadly, “i guess, if you ever need to talk, you can call me?”
he snorts, “i don't even know your name?”
aware he heard you gasp, you quickly answer “it’s seo y/n,”
“ah, pretty..” you heard him try to whisper. “what about you?”
“sim jaeyun, you can also call me jake.” you smile, “alright then, jakey.”
“don’t call me that...” he whines and he receives laughter in response.
“eh.. too bad!~” you tease excitedly. “geez, we get along pretty well, don't you think?” he laughs, and you could sense the smile on the other end of the line.
“yeah, i guess we do.” you smile a bit, “hey, y/n. i gotta go, talk soon?” he asks with a sense of hope.
“sure, i'll save you in my phone!” you shrug to yourself. its not like you’d fall in love over text, right?
as the weeks go by, you both get closer and facetime occasionally. you mostly text each other, which always ends in laughter from both ends.
jake had an idea of asking for you both to meet up, but never actually entertained the idea. he was hoping that fate would come in handy and make you both 'accidentally' bump into each other on the streets one day.
though, as close as you both were, he went radio silent in the following week. confused, you sent him messages almost every hour, considering you both talked a lot.
to get your mind off of jake, you went to a bar and decided to have a drink. as you started to take your first shot, you realized you actually had fallen for sim jaeyun.
sighing to yourself in realization, you took the shot. your love life was never as glamorous as you’d wanted, but it would take a fairytale to make it that way.. or some kind of string of luck.
“y/n?” you heard your name a few meters away from you, the voice sounding vaguely familiar. yet, you didn't care to see who it was, you felt miserable enough already.
“y/n,” the person patted your shoulder making you turn around. soon making your eyes widen, shocked to see jake looking you in the eyes. he also seemed shocked.
“h-how’d you know i was here?” he questioned you, “i should be asking the same thing!” you retorted.
“fate..” he mumbled, making your eyebrow raise. “what?”
pulling you in close, he tightly embraced you. a soft whisper brushes against your ear, “fate.”
“fate?” you whisper back to him as you feel him nod, “the wrong phone number, the random meet up? that’s all fate, my love.”
“my- my love...?” you comment on the sudden pet name, making him chuckle.
a sense of warmth sits on your lips, a soft and tender feeling, jake kissed you. bringing your hand up to gently caress his cheek, you returned the same feeling he gave you.
it was all in fate’s hands, all starting with a wrong number.
#✆. . . wrong number#fanfic#kpop#enhypen#sim jaeyun#sim jake#jake imagines#enhypen jaeyun#enhypen fanfiction#enhypen fanfic#enhypen imagines#enha#enha x reader#jake x reader#sim jaeyun x reader
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Unseen Grave (Yandere!Venture x Reader)
My first post and it's about Venture LOLZ- I've never used tumblr before, I kinda just skim through here on occasion for cool art, writing for some of my favorite characters, and headcanons- Sorry if this is bad- This is also on AO3! I don't mind any requests either, can't promise to get to them quickly though-
CW: Minor Character death, implied/referenced past non/con, dead dove kinda, stalking, non graphic violence, skippable NSFW (This isn't non-con), a kinda abrupt ending, OOC Mauga, No use of Y/N, Gender Neutral Reader
Word Count: 5.3k
Your POV
Where did all of this go wrong? You only ever wanted to live a normal and happy life. Forced into a world of crime, you made it your mission to get yourself and your comrades out of this hell hole. This slimy, sludgy pit you all had seemed perpetually stuck in, but you knew there was better out there. You could all live that lavish and carefree life you always dreamed of, you just had to claw your way to it. So when Mauga approached you, you saw it as an opportunity. Talon spotted your talent, your knack for creating poisons and toxins capable of killing or simple paralysis. Why they sent this big brute you’d never understand.
He held his hand out to you, that devious smirk on his dashing features captivating you like no other, drawing you in like a fly to a honeypot. You couldn’t see the web just inches from it though, nor could you see the spider eyeing you and waiting patiently for you to get stuck in its home. He gave you an offer you simply couldn’t ignore. A whole new identity and payment beyond what you could fathom, more than petty pocket change for simple side hustles, no you’d be playing in the big leagues. If you impressed Doomfist himself enough that is. All you had to do was complete a rather simple task and the position was all yours.
Despite what you’d heard about Mauga, he was quite tricky and conniving with his words. The smartest? Not by a long shot. He couldn’t quite comprehend the big words you used, but he could read you like an open book, and that was enough for him. The smallest twitch or glance was all he needed to know almost exactly what you were thinking and just how much more persuasion you were going to need. A true predator cornering its prey.
If you knew then what you know now, you never would’ve agreed. Then again, Talon may not have let you off the hook so easily. It may have cost you your life. You agreed to the simple mission, poisoning an important political figure and rendering him desperate enough to turn to Talon for a cure. Your unique little toxins could only be cured by you, considering they were abominations to medical science and were something entirely new and original all together. The mere fact that you only had to change one component to make it cause different effects was something you were proud of.
You didn’t doubt yourself in the slightest, so when word of your success was all over the news you felt your pride and ego swell. Doomfist had introduced you into a new world, one where the pay was greater and the tasks were challenging enough for a brilliant mind like yours. Working alongside Dr. O’deorain was fascinating, considering it was she who had inspired you to push the boundaries of the medical world. At the time, Talon seemed like it would give you everything you needed, but blinded by that desire for more and where it could take you you didn’t see it for what it truly was. Just as much of a hell hole as the rest of the world had been.
They squashed your hopes of getting somewhere, of having peace and calm rather than the hustle and bustle of the streets. No, working for them you never knew any kind of peace. A sense of hate began to form inside of you, alongside resentment. Watching them turn your brilliance into mush and treat it as if it was the common whore was devastating. They had the audacity to demand better from you. Working with Talon, you began to develop the belief that a life of crime and hate was your only option, that staying in this pit was the only option for you. The heinous acts you committed just to gain a lick of fortune was the only thing you’d ever be good for. Of course, you blamed Mauga for all of it. He had gotten you into Talon after all with his stupid face and smug words.
You had found yourself in some kind of relationship with him. He never said you two were together but he surely acted like it, getting irritable when others flirted with you or tried to ask you out. The relationship hadn't been the best nor the healthiest, but at the time you were just happy someone wanted you and didn't view you as a monster because of things you couldn't control. He called you so many sweet names, complimented you when Doomfist tried to put you down and offered you a place to run to in any time of need. It was all for his own advantage of course, but you didn’t know that. You just knew you could be vulnerable with him. You were unaware that you’d finally crept too close to the spider's web. No, he wasn’t a spider, he was a wolf. And you were a lamb, strayed too far from the safety of the herd and right into the wolf’s den.
Needless to say, he took advantage of you and your trust in him. The whole time you two were entangled in your complex relationship, he was almost always borderline violent with you and was very hot and cold with you, treating you as if you were some kind of dog that needed to be trained. You complied with almost everything he asked of you, and even when you didn't he forced you to anyway. Countless nights you lay next to him feeling used like some cheap toy for a rabid animal, and yet you stayed. Because Talon was all you had. Because he was all you had. No one was coming to save a monster, especially not one as sneaky and atrocious as you.
In the end, when you finally had enough, Mauga broke you down and ripped your heart to shreds. He called you so many awful names, told you how much he despised you and watched you crumble with disgusting glee. It hurt. Even though he had treated you so poorly, you were still so distraught by his words and callous behavior. The fact that you were readily available for him was the only reason he kept you around, to be a punching bag and plaything when he felt like it. His betrayal fueled a kind of rage you didn’t know you were capable of feeling, and made you realize for the first time that this world was cruel no matter where you looked at it from and you were stuck in an echo chamber of miserable people. Maybe that's why they let you spiral. Used that rage and hurt against you, and made you numb to everything because it was just easier that way. It kept them from picking at your vulnerability any longer, from seeing you as weak..
You weren’t cared for in the slightest at Talon and you were just fine with that. You didn’t need to be babied or coddled anymore than you had when you were first introduced to this raunchy life, especially not by people who were as disingenuous and callous as your “co-workers”. The only one who showed a hint of sympathy or empathy was Dr. Kuiper and Sombra, probably some of the only people in that place capable of expressing such a thing.You couldn’t complain. You still made money so long as you did what was asked of you and didn’t retaliate when you were degraded for your progress or your work. You were pretty sure things took a turn when you met Sloane, who at the time was “Venture” to you.
Pesky, annoying, and constantly getting in the way of your mission to find some artifact for Doomfist from some kind of ancient gravesite. The two of you were naturally enemies, being on opposite sides and all. And yet they intrigued you. Their happy-go-lucky manner and their quippy remarks as they effortlessly kicked the asses of your useless “assistants” you didn’t understand why Doomfist bothered sending. Truthfully, you could’ve accomplished the mission just as well on your own. You probably would’ve killed them too if Overwatch hadn’t shown up. Just as annoying as ever, they helped finish off the rest of your shitty squad, leaving you running off to hide like a dog with its tail between its legs. That mission you had been left behind, abandoned like an injured pup and left to fend for yourself. Badly injured, you would have cared less if you died. Sitting and stewing in your own misery had made you indifferent to life or death.
Doomfist didn’t want to lose you as an asset, but your location didn’t provide him any opportunity to send you an escape route, so you were stuck slinking about the Petra ruins, avoiding the ever-watchful eyes of Overwatch and the Wayfinders as you waited for your wounds to take you out. You’d only been caught because that insufferable archaeologist found you. You were dehydrated with infected wounds, and even then you still bared your teeth at their approach. They had been on guard at first, but seeing you in such a pathetic state had made them take pity on you, something you hadn’t been gracious enough to receive since you were a child.
Taken to the on-site medical facility, you were put under watch but nonetheless you were cared for. You were unfit to go to jail and serve for your crimes right away, so you were stuck there with the Wayfinders, under their care until you could be sent off. For whatever reason, Venture had stuck with you whenever they could, offering short conversation that was mostly one-sided. You didn’t talk much and only glared, uncomfortable with the hospitality. You would’ve preferred if they were rude to you. It was what you were used to. Three days was all it took for you to finally crack. Three days of consistent visits and kind words. Naturally, you were hesitant. Last time you had opened yourself up you were burnt terribly, and had been several times before. Kindness was a poison to you, and yet they made it so desirable. Their genuinity with it and the way they handed it out so easily had you craving it.
After about a month you had completely recovered, well enough to finally go serve for your crimes. The last day you and Venture spent together, you had taken their hand, feeling its warmth as you pressed a small kiss to the back of it. Their flustered reaction made you laugh for the first time since becoming what you were, and it was warm and joyous.
“Thank you, Sloane.” You whispered, refusing to look at them. You didn’t want them to see you cry. “You’ve been so kind to me, even though I’m so undeserving of it. I wish things were different. I wish we’d met before . . . everything.”
“Not everyone deserves a second chance.” Their words stung, making you shrink in on yourself slightly. “But, you’re . . . different. I don’t think you ever really wanted to do the things you did.”
You looked up at them. They saw you, truly saw you, what you were beneath the muck that had clung to you and thickly coated your skin. Something about the way they looked at you gently made you want to melt and embrace them, but you didn’t, still too timid to trust completely.
“You’re not a bad guy, you were just forced into a shitty situation. Try not to be so hard on yourself.” Their smile wasn’t as wide as it usually was, but it was still filled with just as much charisma and warmth.
Looking back on it, you believe it was this small interaction that led to the actions after. That simple and innocent act of gratitude. If not that, then you weren’t sure what, but you could recall that new glint in their eyes when they watched you get taken away. The way their gaze lingered far longer than it ever had. The way they subtly caressed the hand you kissed.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Your time in jail wasn’t bad, made better by the fact that you received letters and small gifts and pictures from Sloane. The letters were innocent to you at the time, but thinking back on it the signs were there. You wrote back, sent small handmade gifts of your own, and kept every picture and ecstatic letter they sent you from each of their journeys that they shared with you. Unfamiliar with the whole concept of having someone truly care about you, you didn’t notice anything weird. You fought a bit with the other inmates who tried their hand at intimidating the newbie, especially with how widespread your reputation had become working with Talon. You had believed yourself doomed to rot there, considering you had attacked several political figures, harmed many innocents, and stolen that much more. You’d also broken Hippocratic Oath and used your research for worse.
But like some unwanted blessing, you found yourself hightailing it out of there early. Talon had come back for you, after abandoning you for months, and before you would’ve run back to them with open arms. Things were different now though, you had changed for the better and knew going back promised nothing but misery. You ran the second you could, barely escaping but escaping nonetheless. Hiding in a sewer wasn’t ideal but it helped you get away from that prison and away from Talon. The one good thing they could’ve done for you, and probably the last. You knew now though that they would be looking for you. Doomfist would be pissed, knowing he wasted valuable time and resources trying to get you out of prison just for you to run off, but that was his own problem. You never asked for his help, perfectly content with rotting in a cell but now gifted a chance of freedom. With nowhere to go though, you turned to the only person you felt you could trust. The one person who made you feel some sense of normalcy.
Going to Sloane was a huge gamble, considering that you were still a wanted criminal and they were pretty much some kind of vigilante hero type. It took you forever to get to Petra, but you managed, lying in wait until you could talk to Sloane again. In the dead of night, you startled them awake, covering their mouth to prevent them from shouting.
“Shhhh. It’s just me.” You whispered, letting their sleepy eyes adjust to the dark, watching them widen at the sight of you. “Follow.”
The simple command was all they needed as they trailed after you, the two of you finding a quiet little spot away from the dig site to speak freely. Sloane was dressed in a form fitting tank top, allowing you to see the various tattoos that decorated their muscular arms, but you tried not to oogle too much.
“W-What are you doing here? I thought you were in prison? . . .” Sloane spoke slowly, voice still laced with the smallest inklings of sleep as they yawned, pushing stray strands of hair from their face.
“Talon came for me.” You saw them tense, scrambling to finish explaining. “I ran though. They don’t know I’m here, but they are searching for me, and I-” your voice caught in your throat as you swallowed thickly. “I can’t go back.”
You never told Venture the full story of your time at Talon, just that it was awful. They didn’t know about Mauga, didn’t know what was said to you, or any of what you had experienced. It was difficult to bring up. What they did know was that you weren’t treated kindly, and that was enough for them.
“I just need somewhere to hide so I can create a new identity for myself. I just want to live a normal life. That’s all I want.” You stumbled forward, taking a hold of their hands, steady in your trembling ones. “I can’t trust anyone else to keep me hidden. Please, I promise you’ll never have to hear from me, I won’t cause anyone any harm, I just-”
Your desperate ranting was cut off as they pulled you into a tight hug. Their scent was calming, earthy and refreshing. They held you gently, a solid rock amidst the swirling storm of emotion you felt. You weren’t sure how to react, arms shaking as you cautiously hugged them back. You felt safe. Accepted. Warm. You began to hitch as your legs buckled and gave out, taking both of you to the ground as you buried your face into their shoulder. How long has it been since you allowed yourself to cry like this? Ugly sobs wrench their way free from your body as they hold you, rubbing slow and calming circles between your shoulder blades.
“It’s okay, you don’t have to be afraid anymore. You’re safe with me, I promise.” They spoke in a hushed tone, accepting you as you were. “You don’t gotta explain anything to me right now, all that can come later.”
They shifted so that they could hold you more comfortably, letting you cry into them without complaint. When you calmed down, you leaned back, their arms slowly falling from you as you stared down at your lap, furiously wiping away tears. You sniffled slightly, before their hands came into view, holding yours.
“You’ll rub your face raw if you keep doing that, it’s okay to be not okay, camarada.” They were gentle with you, scooting closer to you. “I’d be happy to help you out, especially if it’ll bring you some peace. You deserve at least that much, and you’ve more than proven that you deserve it. Apologies won’t make up for much though, there’s only so far words will take you. You gotta make an effort to do better.”
You looked up to meet their gaze, warm brown eyes scanning your face. You didn’t feel judged, and instead could feel that love and care you always so desperately searched for. You did have a long way to go if you even wanted to atone for a fraction of what you had done, but you were aware no amount of repenting would fix anything. You still did what you did, and there was nothing you could do to fix it. And yet, here in Venture’s arms, you felt so sure that things would get better, especially with them at your side. So distracted by your thoughts and their comfort, you barely registered the way they looked at you with a burning possession and the way their smile slightly faltered when you removed yourself from their hold.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Venture POV
Six months. For six, sweet months Venture had you all to themself. It was a miracle of some kind, it had to be. When the two of you had been separated they could hardly stand it, they wanted to go to you and take you from that prison themself. Hide you away from the world where only they could find you. But they had a reputation to uphold, and they wouldn’t be doing anyone much good if they were in prison with you. When you had first arrived all that time ago, Sloane had thought of you as a bad guy working for talon and nothing more, but when they talked to you in the infirmary, they could tell you were different. When you kissed their hand so sweetly, holding back tears, they felt their heart nearly explode.
At first they were scared and confused. These feelings were new and foreign, they’d never felt this way about anyone else before. But you . . . you lit a new fire in them they didn’t know existed, and they wanted more. They wanted you, but you were gone, so they made do with letters and sending you gifts. They remembered when you finally started writing back they could hardly contain themself, not to mention when you sent the little gifts you made by hand. Countless nights Sloane had spent thinking about you, depressed by the thought that they’d never get to touch or hold you. They tossed and turned dreaming about what it would be like to have you next to them instead, but it did nothing to soothe the growing flames of their obsession with you.
And then right out of thin air you appeared, needing them. It had to be fate, the way you came back to them like a lost dog, dependent upon them and their helping hand. Talon had finally done a good thing for them, and that was bringing you two together again. They had been more than willing to do anything for you, but you were so shy and timid. They had to be careful, or else you’d run off and never come back. They had to put on a facade, but was it really a facade when it felt so genuine with you? Because they did care about you, they’d go so far as to say that they loved you. However, they knew you were fragile, knew that this pillar of trust they had built up could be snapped in an instant if you caught a whiff of how they truly felt, because no matter how right this felt to Venture, they knew it was wrong . They had to do this the right way, and that meant keeping their feelings for you a secret.
At first, there wasn’t much to worry about. They had you all to themself by default, considering if anyone saw you they’d send you right back to prison. As they had promised, they kept you hidden away from the prying eyes of everyone at the dig site, whisked away where they wouldn’t find you while they helped you rebuild. They helped you change your appearance, making you look different than what you were before but still vaguely the same. They gave you a place to rest your head, and provided you with food and water. They took care of you, like any good partner would. You probably didn’t see it that way, but Sloane had convinced themself you would with due time. You’d recognize their effort and fall into their arms. You’d let them touch you more, and you’d open up to them and share all your secrets like good partners did. But you didn’t.
No matter what they did, you always seemed to be so far from their reach, withdrawing from their attempts to touch or soothe you when you clearly needed it, and each time they respected that boundary, though patience was wearing thin. You were so close, how could they not want to touch you? They always made due with taking things of yours. Articles of clothing in particular that smelled strongly of you. They loved your smell. It was a unique scent, and they always felt so perverted sniffing your shirts in private. The shame fueled their hunger though, and occasionally they’d get bold enough to take your underwear. Not often, but when they really wanted to.
When you finally cultivated a new identity, they helped you get a job at the Petra site, if only to keep you closer to them. You may have been part of the bio-archaeology team, but you were still theirs. They had been concerned at first, afraid that someone there might catch your eye and take you away from them, but you did wonders in keeping people away. The others might have called you ‘rude’ and ‘scary’, but Venture knew the true you, them and them alone. You kept the rest of the world at bay, and kept them close.
If it wasn’t obvious before, it was now. The two of you were clearly meant for each other, and everyday that passed that you still treated them as a simple friend pained them more and more. Why couldn’t you see what the two of you had? You still tortured them, tempting them to get closer, close enough to touch. Sloane was content playing a well-behaved best friend, but they couldn’t explain that aching desire for more that coiled in their gut as time ticked by.
Despite their own turmoil, you were happy and that was all that mattered. As upsetting as it was seeing you start to open up with others, they couldn’t deny that the look on your face was worth it. Nothing compared to what they could make you feel, but it satisfied them knowing that you were getting what you wanted and what they had promised you’d have. Peace. And they planned on keeping it that way. You believed that Talon couldn’t find you. But the truth was they had, and tried several times to take you away and back into their nasty clutches. But every time, Sloane was there to stop them, dispatching them all with ease. Every time they rammed their drill into a talon goons body, piercing and mangling their flesh, they always thought of you. How this was all for you and only you.
Every bone broken, scream muffled, and skull cracked beneath a boot was all done in your name. These guys wanted to take you back to a place that hurt you, wipe that sweet precious smile off your face forever and undo all of Sloane’s progress. Sloane didn’t feel bad watching their blood stain their clothes because they deserved it, and if they could they would’ve killed every single person working for Talon, but they needed to stay here with you to keep a watchful eye and keep you blissfully unaware. These disgusting bastards wouldn’t ruin you again, not if Venture had anything to say about it.
Tonight was no different as they carelessly tossed more mangled bodies into a ravine, a small smirk of satisfaction evident on their features. How many more would they send before they stopped trying? Then again, it always gave them a rush when they took out these idiots, thinking about how grateful you’d be to them if you knew. Sometimes, when you pulled away they wanted to drag you closer, shake you and confess everything. Confess their love, the things they’d done to those Talon goons who were trying to snag you, maybe then you’d appreciate them. Perhaps you’d even reciprocate their love.
It was becoming too much for them to bear, and as ashamed as they were of the action, they had tried to get closer to you while you were sleeping. They always wanted to consider that it would be the perfect moment to get close to you. They underestimated how light of a sleeper you were though, panicking when you opened your eyes and caught them right in the act. They had to come up with an excuse, one that you surprisingly believed before they excused themself. It wasn’t their proudest moment, but at least they knew not to try it again. You were sleeping now, tired from the day's events, but Sloane lay wide awake in their bed, twitching with anticipation. They hadn’t seen you most of the day, with both of you being busy. As much as they loved what they did, Sloane loved you more.
They wanted to visit you now more than ever, feeling hot and bothered after dispatching those goons, but knowing damn well you wouldn’t allow it. They thought about it several times, coming to you after finishing them off, covered in their blood and giving you a kiss. Your hands roaming them as you praised them for their work. They huffed softly, hands grabbing at their shirt as they flipped over.
~NSFW START~
They were feeling particularly needy tonight, pulling out a shirt of yours they had recently taken. They pressed it to their nose, inhaling deeply and taking in your delectable scent. It still smelled so strongly of you, and it brought them inexplicable joy. They practically salivated over it, breath coming out in whiny gasps. They sat up slightly, taking their pillow and pushing it beneath their body. They let out a soft growl as their hips grinded against the pillow, imagining it to be you instead as they closed their eyes and sniffed again. They shuddered as they let out a breath, whimpering as they continued to grind some more against the pillow.
They thought about how vocal you could be, imaging your hands roaming over their muscles, massaging them as you went. Your legs wrapping around them as they provided you with pleasure, your face contorting in ways they could only cause. The praise you’d give as they followed your every command. Sloane moaned softly as they humped the pillow faster, rougher, free hand curling into the sheets as they pressed their face further into your shirt.
“Joder querido por favor~ I need you~” They whispered the words in a hushed tone, slowing their pace for a moment. “ He sido tan bueno, lo prometo~”
Gods, they could imagine how you would feel, body pressed against theirs, flesh touching flesh as the sound of your love would reverberate through the room. The two of you could care less who would hear, it would just be the both of you in the moment. The marks they would leave on you, nipping at as much exposed flesh as they could, marking you up and claiming you as theirs. You’d beg them for more and they’d happily oblige, giving you what you wanted. They could be gentle, or they could be rough. They could pin your hands and make you squirm and beg for their touch, or perhaps you’d like to be on top, having them worship every inch of you and beg to touch you. Beg you for relief.
“Dios ya no puedo más, te necesito mucho mi amor por favor~” Their voice was high pitched and whiny, desperation laced in their tone. “Tell me how good I’ve been for you~ Fuck ~ You feel so good mi amor~ Tell me how good I make you feel~”
Their moans gradually got louder the deeper into the fantasies they sank, desperately wishing for the real thing. They could only think about how soon enough it could be you, you just needed a little more coaxing and to realize your feelings that you undoubtedly had for them. They could see it in the way you looked at them, feel it when you touched them. Your words were so gentle with them, and you were so sweet. God they couldn’t wait to have you. They’d take it as slow as you needed if only it meant you’d be closer to them. How would your lips finally feel once you let them get close enough? How would you taste?
“Mine, mine, mine. All mine. Only mine.” Their words were muffled, coming out in short growls, matching the pace they had set for themself. “Eres toda mía, mi amor, toda mía~” The words came out in a chant, laying some unknown claim on you for their own sake and sanity.
Sloane slowed their movement against the pillow, thinking about how whiny you’d get when they went slower than you liked, and then picked up again in the same beat to keep you on your toes. Their thrusts got rougher as they groaned, panting desperately as they approached their climax, their last few thrusts desperate as they let out one last cry, sweat dripping from their body as they relaxed, nuzzling their face into your shirt.
~NSFW END~
Sloane instantly felt much more relaxed, feeling the tension leave their body. Such a mess they’d made. They thought about laying next to you, giving you soft kisses and praise as they cleaned you up and snuggled close to go to bed. Unfortunately, they weren’t with you and couldn’t sleep while being such a mess. They lifted themself from their bed, tucking your shirt away again for a later date. For now, they needed to clean themself up, grabbing a towel as they headed for the showers. In due time the two of you would be together. You’d recognize your love for them, and they’d be waiting for you with open arms, no matter how long it took. Until then, they were content just being near you, protecting you from afar.
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So how about tooth fairy Jack frost Easter bunny and mr claus(sorry if do do him) with someone that represents karma and make bad things happen to terrible people.
Tooth fairy,Jack frost,Easter bunny/bunnymund and north with a karma reader
I have so many requests so I'm starting off with the requests that have the less characters bc they take me the less amount of time.
Of course you can,for this you will be chosen as a guardian because karma dosnt nescerally have someone who represents it so they just have to believe in karma and shit.
Also norths will be more platonic than romantic
Has been proof read
Ty for the request
Tooth fairy
Shes kinda scared that you'll be something like pitch black
However once shes been explained to that you give people what they had coming she understands alot better
Despite her first interpretation shes actually very sweet
She sees you give a bully karma and she just smiles sweetly at you.
You and her come across each other every so often,usually it's because someone had their tooth taken out unwillingly(like someone punching someone or something)
She likes hanging out when shes not collecting teeth or just having some down time
You also explain to her that when you give someone karma they had it coming and deserved it
You like to hang out with her at the tooth palace(or whatever its called)
You have actually given abit of karma to pitch before
There have been times where you've had to put bunnymund and Jack in their place,she finds it funny whenever this happens
Her mini tooths love you to bits
Even when your not at the palace you'll always have a small group of them following you about
They like to make sure your okay and pick up teeth along the way
Jack frost
Honestly hes kinda excited
A guardian of karma sounds excitciting
He probally wouldnt be surprised if he was one of the first to receive karma though
He asks you constantly why you give him karma,much like a kid who broke a vase then pretended they didnt do anything
Hes very clingy
Tries to get other people out of trouble by bribeing you
If hes ever done something that you need to give him karma for he'll try get out of it by sweet talking
If there one person he'll never stop you giving karma to its pitch
Infact he constantly whines to you about giving pitch more,even going as far as making things up
He likes putting his hand on your shoulder
Will start snow fights with you at random
He will definatly see you floating around during an unexpected storm
Your almost constantly busy so he dosnt get to much time with you
Because of this he will definatly start more frost days so you can spend a day off with him and enjoy the snow
Bunnymund/Easter bunny
Hes mixed between two mindsets
Having another responsible guardian
Another Jack situation
He would definitely be surprised if he got any karma,its be a "I dont think I deserve this " even though he knows what hes done
Hes definitely got it easy after seeing the type of karma you gave to Jack though
Will ask if you can give karma to Jack,because he was playing with some of the elves....
He likes to hang out with you when your not doing anything in Easter island
He likes to give you personalized eggs as presents
Hes very protective of you especially when coming on the topic of pitch
Speaking of,bunny would definatly ask how much karma hes due,isnt surprised with the amount
You sometimes help him place the eggs around at Easter,its a fun activity for the day
Your the only one he'll ever allow to brush his fur,let alone touch it
Glares at Jack if he gets to close
North(platonic)
He trust the man in the moon,and so far manny hasnt been wrong in choosing his guardians
Hes also heard about you before so hes confident in manys choosing
Hes grateful that you seperate Jack and bunny alot,they can be quite tiring sometimes
Since you dont really have a realm or anything north let's you hang about in the workshop
The yetis and elvs love you
The elves will often climb on you or show you some of the toys
You help the yetis paint and make the toys every so often
He gives you one of the snow globes so if you cant make it back yourself you can just throw the globe
He acts very much like a father figure to you
Asking how your day was and what some of the people did etc
He was the one to reasure the others that you ment no Ill intention
You fit very well into the guardians
If north thinks you need a break he gives you a toy with a note with it
Let's you pet the reindeer
He allows you to watch the globe if your ever bored
#cattonic writes#rise of the guardians#rise of the guardians x reader#guardian reader#karma guardian reader#north x reader platonic#tooth fairy#tooth fairy x reader#jack frost#jack frost x reader#bunnymund#bunnymund x reader
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Doumeki is the first person ever that hold out his hand to Yashiro:
(Part 1)
Doumeki is the first person ever to stop yashiro's assault, in their first encounter doumeki stop's the guy that is pinning roughly Y down on a desk,
look right in his eyes and ask him a question, THE question that never been asked to him before :
"Are you okay ?"
This question that no one before cared enough to bother ask, a simple question that is so meanfull and important but never been asked to Yashiro.
No one ever cared enough about Y to just chek if he was alright, he always been abused neglected and used, he's whole life, by everyone he encounter's in he's life :
He's mom :
The little nine years old yashiro never been asked by his Mom if he was okay, we have no clue to know if she knew or not what was going on with her son, but as a mother not seeing that your own son is being raped by his stepdad is kinda off ( he literaly raped Y just behind her while she was sleeping..)
we know that play's a big part in Y's trauma and fucked up mindset, this disgusting piece of shit that raped him violently used that to brainwash Y to think that he liked feeling pain, to convince a literal child that dosen't even understand what's going on, that if he feel pain than he would get pregnant and if his mom find out she gonna be mad and abandon him, he was so young and clueless that he didn't even understand that it's imposible, but in the mind of a child, if an adult say something than it have to be true.
How horifying and disturbing to hear that for a child ? How much those words shaped the way of thinking and logic of the current Y ? How much of an impact those fucked word disturbed his way of thinking and helped him shape his facade that he lived with for 40 years ?
This panel is one of the most hurtfull (and one of my favorite btw) in this masterpiece, its speak's without words, him watching a little kid being sheltered by her mom with an umbrela from the rain speak so loud, the pain, the lonelines is screaming.
Why not me ? Why my mom, the one person that should be protecting me from all the bad of the world, didn't care about me and the abuse I lived ? Why didn't she sheltered me ? Why didn't she protect me ? Why she never asked me if I was okay ?
So heartbreaking (just for doumeki to return to the car with an fuking umbrella...crying right now).
I'm not saying that his mom knew but I'm saying there is always clue from abuse, she negleted him to the point that she didn't even bother enough to notice or maybe even ignored them (the sighs) in purpose.
And after all of that she abandon him like a piece of a trash that Y is already convinced to be at this point, dirty, twisted beyond repair, unloveable, a livestock that no one want, like he say's himself .
A parent or carer’s belief in the child, and support and actions to stop the harm after the child’s disclosure have an impact on the child’s resilience and recovery from the sexual abuse. If a child is not believed and supported appropriately after a disclosure it can lead to a higher level of relational trauma for the child leading to significantly more negative health and mental health outcomes for the child in the long-term.
Kageyama Kanji:
Now come kageyama, yashiro's first friend and first Love, when Y met kageyama he's already deep in self destruction by seeking violent sex with violent men (mostly yakuza men that are more violent and homophobic) as a coping mecanism from what he lived from his childhood to his puberty.
(At this point Y didn't see his step dad for 3 years and he stoped the rape surely because Y body changed and growed up, disgusting pedo.. And he didn't see his mom for aroud a year)
With kageyama Y encounter for the first time physical touch without pain but he's to deep to even realize it at this point.
intersting to notice how Y did not seek out sex when he though about kage.
At this moment Y try to seek a reaction from kageyama but the only thing that he would have is :
"Okay" okay ? like WTF ! (Y look so disappointent), he's beging for attention here, he's beging for care, for confort, even if he dosen't realise it, he want's someone to care so bad.
But Kage is again An another person that did not care enough to even try to ask him a simple "are you okay ?" and after this indiference he take his distance from Y (the worst thing to do in this situation) I know kage is an akward teenager and just a random classmate but for god sake he couldn't have tried a little harder...
Again we can see how Y try so hard to seek a reaction from kage he want him to care so bad, deepdown he want someone to notice that he isn't well.
I know Kageyama feel sorry for Y and care for him in a way but never verbalize it he just tell's him that he's pitiful and pathetic because he is all alone..(something he continue to think even now) he pity him but he's not bothered enough to really reach out to him.
And that lead to again one of the most hurtfull and heartbreaking moment, Y break's down in tears cause he can't hold it anymore (the one and only time we see him cry). No one care about him, he have no home, no roots, no one to rely on, no one to trust. He is all alone, in both physical an mental distress.
So he seek a sort of "confort" in what he know's : pain, physical one, as a form of self harm but also mental pain relief, to not feel emotions up there (brain) to numb his unbearable existence.
Yashiro learned with Kageyama, by loving someone for the first time, again, the deception, the emptiness and the loneliness, of not being loved.
And the despair of this first person being a man. Those same men that raped him, abused him, used him, crushed him, breaked him. He hate's them but he finish by falling for one of them.
See you in part 2
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when emma falls in love
synopsis: ellie might be in love with you, and you might just be in love with her too… if only you could admit it
pairing: college!ellie x fem!reader
warnings: too many tlou references, food, not proofread!!!!! also using angel in place of y/n bc it makes me cringe a little!
a/n: lets play a game called “how many references can kate make in her fics?”
‘IM JUST PRETTY GREAT WITH MY FINGERS’
when emma falls in love, she paces the floor closes the blinds and locks the door when emma falls in love, she calls up her mom jokes about the ways that this one could go wrong
ellie couldn’t keep up.
she felt like every time dina came over, there was someone new in your life, and she couldn’t understand how. you were perfectly nice and even prettier.
but here she was, yet again in her dorm, listening to dina rant about the latest endeavor.
“and he was just a total dick! like, how are you going to say you’re busy tonight with family and then go to a party? like are you stupid?” dina sighed. “i love her, but god does she picks some idiotic ones. you remember the beach girl?”
oh she remembered the beach girl.
on an annual beach trip over spring break, some blonde had caught your eye, and you caught hers. you had invited her to join them for dinner, and how could anyone say no to you?
you hit it off with the blonde, abby, and she spent the next couple days with the group, constantly flirting with you. ellie had felt a sort of dread fill her stomach. why her? she was obviously playing in to what you wanted and she knew you were smart enough to see that.
the trip wrapped up and you made plans with abby, excited she only live a town over. but when the time came, you spent 3 hours at the park waiting for her, only to receive a text saying she wouldn’t be able to make it.
you were upset and crashed at dina’s, and ellie had heard about it all the night.
“yes, god, i remember her. what a douche.” she rolled her eyes, standing up to grab her bag for class. “i’ve gotta go, but are we all still going out tonight?” dina nodded with a smile. “cool. don’t do anything stupid. and lock my door before you leave, please.”
“says you. and i’ll think about it!”
shes walking out the door when she hits something, or someone.
“shit.”
“fuck, sorry my bad.”
when she focuses back, she sees you. “hey, what are you doing here?”
“oh, dina told me to come over. are you going?” you leaned in the doorway. “dina, come on, stop invading people’s space. lets go!”
she groaned, “but ellie said we could smoke here!” she got up nonetheless, heading to join you. “thanks anyways els, have fun in class!”
“bye ellie!”
she sighs as she watches you two walk away. why does air fill her head whenever shes around you?
she waits and takes her time ‘cause little miss sunshine always thinks its gonna rain when emma falls in love, i know that boy will never be the same
“so, angel, how’s it going with you and that girl?” jesse felt a kick at his leg and turned to dina. “what? am i not allowed to ask questions?”
“no, no, it’s fine. we didnt work out, but thats okay!” you smiled brightly at the table. “i think im gonna take a break anyways. im kinda sick of it.”
they all shared a knowing look. “hey, no! i promise, this is for real.”
“hun, its not that we don’t believe you.” ellie started. “iits just that… we dont believe you!” you groaned and stole a fry from her plate. “look, we’ve just heard that a lot, and we dont wanna see you get hurt.”
“but im not going to! because im taking a break.” you kicked ellie. “you dont have to believe me, but can you at least pretend to?” they gave in and cheered for you. “thanks, now who wants to share a brownie?”
“okay, so its c minor sharp, f sharp, b, e, repeat?” you and ellie sat on the dorm room floor, her guitars in both of your laps.
“yea exactly, just on the third repeat, its a g sharp minor instead of a b.” you nodded at her and plucked the chord. “exactly. and i pluck for it so just… just watch?”
she played the song slowly, speaking her pattern as she went along. you nodded at her when she finished, figuring you knew it well enough. “okay, play it together?”
“yep!”
she counted down before starting, making you smile.
“talking away, i dont know what im to say. ill say it anyway, todays another day to find you shying away. ill be coming for your love, okay.” you hummed a harmony as ellie sang the words.
“are you sure you don’t usually play? youre a total natural at this.” ellie marveled as you let the last chord hum out.
“i guess im just pretty good with my fingers.” you felt your cheeks blaze as you heard back what you said.
dina chuckled, “damn right!” she stood up, going for the door. “gonna grab a bottle of water. play more for us beautiful ladies!”
ellie taught you the rest of the song, both of you more awkward than usual. you really came along it so fast, ellie was amazed.
“okay, seriously, you have to be messing with me because you are way to good at this.”
“i promise! i only took piano lessons.”
‘cause shes the kind of book that you cant put down like if cleopatra grew up in a small town and all the bad boys would be good boys if they only had the chance to love her and to tell you the truth sometimes i wish i was her
ellie had a thought that she might be, maybe, just could be a little in love with you.
she couldnt be though. right?
sure, she knew all of your favorite foods, and knew the words to your favorite song, knew your favorite books like the back of her hand, could tell anyone how you took your coffee.
but that was friendly. you guys were friendly. friends.
she guessed you guys hung out a lot, but thats because they always hung out as a group. she might’ve gotten excited when you joined, but that doesnt mean anything.
and of course she had noticed you were pretty. gorgeous, even. but so had everyone else. its not like she had purposefully memorized your features. every line and mark.
she could draw jesse from memory perfectly, its not like she liked him.
it was normal.
totally normal.
fuck.
“where’s angel?” ellie asked, looking to dina.
“not coming.” she sighed, digging around her purse for a pack of gum. “said she was busy, but she wouldn’t say why.”
“i think we all know why,” jesse teased. they all gave him a look, but he leveled them with one of his own. “im not insulting her. its just that, this isn’t exactly out of her nature. i mean seriously, who actually took her promise seriously?”
ellie excused herself to the bathroom, dialing you before she even reached the door.
“hello?”
“hey, where are you?” she picked at the already chipping nail polish she had on.
“uhm, im out.” you sighed. “look, im kind of busy. did you need somet-“
she had to cut to the chase. “are you on a date?”
“excuse me?”
“are you on a date?”
“thats none of your business.”
“oh fuck off, you know it very much is. so. are you?”
“fine, yea i am. now can i get back to it?”
“we are talking later.”
she joined the group back at their table, but couldnt focus back in on the conversation.
“you okay, ellie?” she looked up at dina, nodding with a hum.
“yea, sorry, got lost for a second.”
when emma falls apart, its when shes alone she takes on the pain and bears it on her own ‘cause when emma falls in love, she’s in it for keeps she wont walk away unless she knows she absolutely has to leave
she didnt even bother to knock, just walked straight through your dorm room door.
“ellie, what the hell?” you were in bed, a book in hand and music playing from a speaker. “what happened to knocking?”
ellie b-lined for your bed, taking a seat at the foot of it. “why were you on a date?”
“dude, seriously, what if i was naked? so not okay!” you placed a bookmark on your page and set the book to the side.
“okay, fine im sorry!” she groaned and found your eyes. “now why were you on a date? what happened to taking a break?”
“what do you want me to say, els?” you exhaled and looked down at your hands. “that i cant keep anything? that i cant keep promises or partners?” ellie felt bad as she saw your eyes were glossy and the frown on your face. “im sorry im such a screwup and that i cant do anything right. anything else?”
ellie ran her fingers through her hair. “im sorry.” she crossed her legs on your bed and looked at you. “really im sorry, this was so uncalled for. youre right, its not my business. im really sorry. i just wan-“
she froze.
surely you couldnt be kissing her right now.
before she could even think to reciprocate, you pulled away, a deer in headlights look on your face.
“im so sorry.” you whispered moving away from her. “god, im so so sorry. you should go. im sorry.” she opened her mouth to try and say anything, but you beat her to it. “ellie, please, just go.”
she saw the tears well and felt compelled to stay. but her body went against her, forcing her feet to walk out the door to her own room.
e: you cant ignore me forever. read
e: please angel, just talk to me. read
e: you kissed me, not the other way around. stop making this my fault. read
e: millers, noon? just coffee, i promise. read
a: im sorry.
ellie tossed her phone at her bed.
“whats up with you?” dina probed. “youve been… peeved this week. whats up?”
“who the hell says peeved?” she tried to joke but was met with dinas serious face. “im fine! seriously!” god that face made her break. “okay fine, just… dont tell anyone.”
dina nodded excitedly and sat down infront of her.
“angel kissed me, and then she freaked out and made me leave, and now she wont even talk to me!” ellie fell back onto her bed.
“SHE KISSED YOU?” dina squealed. “OH MY GOD, HOW COULD YOU NOT TELL ME SOONER!”
“did you hear nothing else that i said?”
and shes the kind of book that you cant put down like if cleopatra grew up in a small town and all the bad boys would be good boys if they only had the chance to love her and to tell you the truth sometimes i wish i was her
e: please, im begging you, just talk to me. read
a: what do you want me to say ellie?
e: literally anything. read
a: i messed up els, okay?
a: i shouldn’t have kissed you. im sorry.
e: but you should have. and you did. read
a: what?
e: meet me at millers? read
a: ellie…
e: please. read
a: omw.
e: thank you omg. read
a coffee was waiting on the table for you when you arrived. you sat across from ellie, hesitantly taking the drink. “you wanted to talk.” you talk a sip, finding it tasted like your usual order. “so talk.”
“okay look… i’m just as confused and nervous as you are.” she laughed nervously and fiddled with her own cup. “but, im glad you kissed me.”
“what?”
“yea i know.” she took a deep breath before continuing. “i only recently, like very recently, realized my feelings were misplaced. i really dont wanna be friends.”
you groaned, “and you couldnt have just texted me that?”
“fucks sake, just let me finish!” she pleaded, picking back up when you sat back into your chair. “i like you. like, a crazy lot, and it freaks me out. so please, let me at least take you on one date. if not, its fine, we just cant be friends. i wouldnt be able to stand it.”
you chewed at a nail as you took in what she had said.
“say something.”
a beat of silence before.
“okay.”
“okay?” she whispered.
“yea, okay. you can take me on a date.”
well, shes so new york when shes in l.a. she wont lose herself in love the way that i did ‘cause she’ll call you out she’ll put you in your place when emma falls in love, im learning
“hey, hurry up, im waiting downstairs for you.”
ellies voice rang through your room as you placed her on speaker.
“nuh uh, im not done. you asked me out, now deal with the consequences. ill be down when im ready.” you pulled out your outfit, throwing it on as you spoke. “just scroll on insta or something if you’re that bored.”
“fine.”
she hung up and you couldn’t help but laugh. you had been so nervous in the days leading up to this, but suddenly felt much better as she yelled at you like normal.
you finally met her at her car, hopping in the passenger seat and connecting your phone.
“the hell are you doing?” ellie squealed.
you scoffed and rolled your eyes. “passengers princess gets aux. suck it up loser.” you queued up songs as she pulled out and onto the main road. “where are we going anyways?”
“you’ll see.”
“god you are so annoying.”
and yet you smiled at her.
“an arcade? really?” you looked at her with eyebrows raised.
she shrugged and unbuckled, opening her door to get out. you shook your head, shocked still you were on a date with ellie williams. at the arcade.
she pulled you through the maze of a place to some own machine. “mortal kombat? what even is this?”
she smiled so bright, you couldnt help but smile back. “just wait, its so fun.”
emma met a boy with eyes like a man turns out her heart fits in the palm of his hand now he’ll be her shelter when it rains little does he know, his whole world’s about to change
“it was totally fun right? c’mon, you can admit it!” she pushed your shoulder, seeing your smiling face.
“okay yes, fine it was fun, i had fun!” you laughed, staring at her face. “i never really noticed you had this many freckles.”
you traced a finger across her cheeks. down the slope of her nose. across her eyebrow, stopping to poke the scar running through the left one.
“you’re pretty.” you whispered.
she blushed. “i think you’re gorgeous.” she whispered back.
her eyes were so pretty.
“can i kiss you?”
‘cause shes the kind of book that you cant put down like if cleopatra grew up in a small town and all the bad boys would be good boys if they only had the chance to love her and to tell you the truth sometimes i wish i was her
“please.”
yeah, between me and you sometimes i wish i was her
#! what would you do… !#ellie williams#ellie williams tlou#ellie willams the last of us#ellie williams x you#ellie williams x reader#ellie williams x female reader#ellie williams fluff#ellie williams x y/n
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Personal take on "Chayanne as a Glass Child Interpretation" that no one asked for
===
Apparently people have been using the "Chayanne has glass child syndrome" thing to rag on q!Philza, which I haven't seen, at least not overtly. Or at least not with the purposeful intent of labelling q!Philza completely as a Bad Parent. But I can get why ppl would feel like that is an attack on his character (*stares at DSMP*)
But I also kinda wish some ppl understood that when we interpret the fact that Chayanne is a glass child, it isn't necessarily to blame q!Philza and his parenting.
please
Because anyone that has a singular critical thinking brain cell can see that the man is trying so fucking hard to raise his two children, and that he loves both of them so much. And that is the sad thing isn't it. Because the thing about glass children is that practically always it is not intentional, and the parents never mean to neglect or force their more capable/older children to become so. That it is often just a consequence of the circumstances of their lives together, and it is something that isn't obvious most of the time until it of course becomes an issue. That for all the efforts of the caretaker(s), they sometimes need to focus on one child more because of their needs and that is perfectly understandable, especially if it is health needs. But as a result, there are gaps in the support and needs of the family. And so, other children in the family that are capable of helping just end up doing so because additional aid and care is needed.
And if you especially look at the Death family's circumstances, we can see those circumstances in play. That the island is dangerous compared even to "normal" society, with the government system provides little to no additional care for its residents & their families. If not downright making it basically punishing them because they have children, due to needing to work for additional resources for their kids (cookies, tasks, etc.) And then there are the monsters and external forces trying to kill and torment all of them. Now that is already fucked, but then you consider the fact that Philza has two children, as he is their primary caretaker due to q!Missa's frequent absence. Which not blaming q!Missa, as the family still loves him and like probable lore reasons, but regardless that adds to the circumstances of the family. That q!Philza is the only one, for the majority of the time, responsible for two kids instead of just one for most of the other parents.
Which again, I will say that other residents also help out with taking care of other eggs of their own and all that, I won't deny that. But they can't always know or be able to pinpoint all things that the two children specifically need or be reliable as the island limits their ability to help.
That at the end of the day, Philza in specific is considered the official guardian for Chayanne and Tallulah, and the one that they spend most time with in their development on the island.
That with the constant danger and additional circumstances surrounding them, it is no wonder that Chayanne ended up taking more responsiblity, becoming more mature in the process. That like any other kid that could see their family struggling and also feel it, he wanted to help his dad. And especially at first, when they had Tallulah and it was evident she needed support due to her asthma and health issues (aka internet issues). She needed not just the support of Philza, who was already lacking consistent support of a partner, but also her brother to help out in case. That it might not have been the intention for Chayanne to take on these burdens or have to grow up so fast, but it happened out of necessity.
That it was as a result of everything they have faced on that island, both good and bad, for Chayanne to have turned out the way he has now and before.
And, I want to stress this so fucking much that neither Philza nor Tallulah are responsible for this. No one in this family is completely at fault because for fucks sakes it isn't exactly like they fucking meant for Chayanne to be a parentified child. That yes their circumstances contributed to to the situation, but that is the same as saying the island has given them lemons and they had to just do the best with it. And that in some ways, they are still growing out of their original dynamics, even months now that they have changed so much and literally have been displaced onto a new place. That in this manner specifically, Philza sometimes still falls into the same mentality in believing Tallulah is still the same little girl that he needs to constantly look out for, when she has become so much more and grown to be able to defend herself. Honestly almost, if not, just as well as Chayanne. But I also acknowledge that he has improved quite a bit, and given her much more freedom and autonomy, especially since they all reunited after Purgatory. But he is still getting used to it, and even in these few months, he has learned to give them room to grow a bit.
Also, I don't blame him for sometimes falling back on the old habits considering you know the dangers he is so guarded against are real and most definitely out to get him and his eggs.
The whole thing of people having flaws and making mistakes yada yada ya, they don't know everything they need to do all the time, especially with things changing constantly and all that shit.
And in some ways, I look at Chayanne right now and I see he is more of a glass child healing from their early circumstances. That his family has acknowledged in some way that he had to take on so much more than what a kid should have. And while I don't think they have unpackaged everything, and that it something that will take a lot more time. Not to mention all the new issues that pop up every other fucking day (for void sake, let this family have a goddamn break). But the thing is they are improving. That they are definitely moving towards that direction in which they are looking in retrospect of what they had to deal with and realizing things. And then, they are having conversations about it together.
And look, for all the things you can say about Death Family, they are all trying their best. That yes perhaps their family is dysfunctional due to fact that it is literally IMPOSSIBLE to cultivate a healthy stable and safe environment for them to grow up in. And yes, of course there are interpersonal issues and current trauma that they need to work through because of all the things they experienced on the island, there are issues in every family, small or big that needs to be worked through. But that doesn't negate the fact that they are trying so hard to the best of their abilities because of each other. That it is undeniable that they have sought to improve and grow and become who they are because they love their family, and hold each other closely in their hearts. That they are still people actively trying to discover things about themselves. And it will always be a struggle in their places as the family they are, but they do so out of love for each other.
But yes whole point is, "Chayanne has experiences that can be comparable to that of a glass child" and "q!Philza is a flawed person that is trying his best" and "Death Family is dysfunctional but also loving of each other" are all statements that can exist together.
Death Family isn't perfect and I love them for that <3
#qsmp#qsmp death family#qsmp philza#qsmp chayanne#qsmp tallulah#qsmp analysis#qsmp fandom crit#saph rambles#is this a hot take i dunno know#but i was getting a bit annoyed with ppl going - oh Chayanne isn't a glass child just ppl being mean to Philza for no reason -_-#<--- Me as an oldest child specifically relating to Chayanne because of experiences having a parent that means well but shit *circumstances#also if I do see anyone shit on any of the Death Family members for Chayanne being glass child or blah blah I am smacking you SHUT#i love death family specifically because they are flawed and imperfect but its undeniable they love each other#and because of that they are trying so hard to improve and go on for each other by facing the fact they have unintentionally hurt each othe#and it is hard but that is the process of making amends and taking accountability so they can heal and i feel so normal about it#i just like yapping about death family my cubitos <3
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lovesick | pedro pascal [4]
"and on this night and in this light i think im falling, im falling for you."
previous chapter: [3] series masterlist
summary: in which a 1975-obsessed film student accidentally falls in love with an older man she can't have.
pairing: actor!pedro x intern!reader
genre: acting world!au, big age-gap!, strangers to friends- maybe lovers?? au | angst, mature, awkward, love- eventually
word count: 10.6k
status: in progress
author's note: so sorry for the long wait! but i tried making this chapter longggg. i typically have my days off altogether and the rest of the week booked with work/school. i try to post many chapters within my short timeframe (bc im booked af) so pls expect another update soon after this one! sadly, it takes me around 8-10 hours to write one bc its hard to think lol. also, i don't want this to be too long of a series and kinda wanna connect the dots- slowly but surely, ya know? not edited.
"So, he just came knocking on your door at 6am?" Joon questioned, taking a sip of his smoothie soon afterwards. "I can't even wake up that early."
"We had to do that everyday for our last job."
"I woke up ten minutes before I had to be out the door," he shrugged. "Men get ready fast."
"Anyway," you eyed him as he cluelessly did the same, confused as to why you wouldn't look away. "I don't remember him coming."
"Yeah, because you fucking freaked out and hallucinated over Lady Gaga," Jules exclaimed, you automatically cringing just at the horrible memories you've recently faced with that damn cat.
Once she explained what had happened hours after you had woken up, you were disturbingly shocked.
And the fact that your sleepiness was to blame had you going insane- imagine all the other odd things you may had committed while under the covers.
But you will admit you did remember some of that night's events clearly, again like you practically making out with Lady Gaga- although she was the one who licked your face endlessly first.
Mortified just by the thoughts, you will never be able to face Pedro again sanely.
How could you when you recently dreamed about a man 25 years older being intimate with you- that's...confusing. And the worst part of it all was you couldn't say anything to anyone with the fear of being judged or laughed at- maybe both.
The thing was you couldn't quite understand why you had to dream about that. Maybe your time of the month was coming and your hormones targeted the first guy you had nonstop contact with?
No, that would've been Joon.
Attraction may had played a part but Joon definitely had that, Pedro as well but a little different...age-wise at least. There's no way you felt allured for men with bad jokes and rough skin- no offense. Right?
He did text you that same morning he dropped by and commented on how creepy you are half asleep and whether or not you agreed to his 'business' proposal. Not trying to start a conversation you knew you couldn't finish, out of second-hand shame, you just replied a simple:
LOL but busy with school atm to make a final decision- tell ya later
That later still hasn't arrived.
Unfortunately, you forgot to ask him why he made a random visit that morning- but you weren't going to ask him days later. In your mind, you need to avoid him. There's no way you'd be able to act normal after have unholy fascinations about him.
Not that it'll be a problem, you two hadn't seen each other for weeks before your cafe encounter, you're sure you can do it again without him noticing your distance.
It's been about two days since then which meant you didn't have to prioritize so much of your time on homework, you'll just save that for Sunday when it's all due.
"Did you bother to ask him why?" Jules added, turning to you. "He obviously wasn't coming to see me- I barely know the guy."
"You do know him!" you argue as she rolls her eyes. "You literally got mad at me for not recognizing him the first time we met."
"He's a celebrity- everybody knows him," she defends before tilting her head in curiosity. "But you two are oddly close, it's kind of weird."
"No," you shake your head, trying to laugh off her suspicions. "We are casual friends who fan girl over the same things."
People did take notice how close Pedro and you were but it wasn't anybody's fault you two had so much in common. Both of you loved Starbucks, going on hikes- when you weren't lazy, and believe Matt Healy is extremely attractive.
If they have a problem with that they can sue you.
"I see it," Joon adds, jumping up a bit. "Him and I barely talk and we're men- we should be bonding easily!"
"You're...you," Jules cringes, making Joon glare in return. "I can understand why he chooses not to be close to you."
Laughing, you watch as Joon quickly flips her the finger before he continues on with the conversation. "I just feel like he always comes around only to see you, it was pretty obvious since the first time he took us home."
Furrowing your eyebrows, you didn't understand what he meant by that. Pedro offered all three of you a ride home, not just you.
Already feeling done with this topic, you wanted to switch it before things started escalating and freaky theories started unfolding. They had every right to question your friendship, but you were starting to think they might be leading down a road where they may soon develop other impressions as to what your friendship might have been.
Why are you even thinking that? That's so inappropriate to imagine.
"You two are silly, he probably needed my advice on something or wanted to workout," you suggest, their faces showing they weren't fully convinced. "But anywho, did you call Yoongi yet?"
"I don't think that's a great idea," Joon declared, adjusting in your warm sofa. "He's not really a skating kind of guy."
Since it was Friday and you had no plans, you thought it would be a fun idea to be adventurous for once and do something you would never do on a regular basis.
Ice Skate.
Your friends were extremely down with the idea, but you needed a fourth person to make the group complete. Why not a skinny, impatient blonde man who would probably spend the whole night complaining about why this plan was awful?
Right now you could use some other grumpiness in your life.
"Just tell him to go," you beam back, clapping your hands in excitement as you'll soon be able to fall countless of times on the ice. "I'll buy him hot cocoa."
"You better do it or he'll never let that go," Joon states.
After hours of sitting around and blasting random music through your speakers, the three of you were ready to set off on your journey of locating the ice rink.
If it wasn't for Joon's constant whining to stop walking to take pictures of the scenery you probably would've arrived 15 minutes sooner than your actual arrival, but too bad your friend is a nature freak.
"You taking pictures of the pigeons better not be the reason why you're late," you heard Yoongi grumble as the three of you finally found him sitting on a bench near the entrance of the rink, staring directly at Joon who just scoffed.
"I'm sorry if my happiness bothers you," Joon snapped back as Yoongi just stood up from his seat and made his way to your trio.
Grabbing your ice skates wasn't too difficult as the long line seemed to flow by smoothly, but standing on them was a different story.
"I can't do this," you squeal as your hurriedly motion your arms around to find some balance. "I'm falling!"
Yoongi sent you a questionable look as he watched your poor attempts to stay still embarrassing. "We're not even on the ice yet."
Feeling a hand grab a hold on your shoulders and practically drag your feet towards the ice, you glance up to see Jules steadily directing you to face your fears.
Maybe this wasn't such a good idea.
"Are you going to push her in?!" you hear Joon gasp a few feet behind you but you couldn't turn your head as you rather focused your attention on yanking yourself off of Jules.
"It was her idea so she'll be the one going in first."
"Ahh!" you screech, putting all your pressure on your feet to stop her hard pull. Spiraling your ankles in the most crucial ways, you start to lightly slap her arms off you as she continues to fight them off.
One thing about her was she's going to make sure to remind you that this was your idea.
Feeling an arm gently tug you off her grip, you landed on Yoongi's side as Jules whined in return, offended that he ruined her vicious plan. Respectfully, he kept you stable with an arm wrapped behind your middle back as you gripped his other one, fearful she might snatch you away again.
"Why would you do that?!"
"I don't think watching her fall face first on the hard ice would be a fun sight to see," he bluntly returned as Jules huffed. "The sight of blood gives me the ick."
"I was waiting for that moment all afternoon," Jules sighed, disappointed that she wouldn't be seeing you fall- yet.
Waiting for her to walk away to go on the ice, you see Joon follow her before you released your friend, relieved that she wouldn't be partaking in her scandalous scheme just yet.
"You do know how to skate, right?" Yoongi asked, his uncertain eyes on yours as you crazily wave your arms in front of him to rub off his questionable thoughts.
"Do I? Of course I do!" you argue, making your way towards the ice until you were two feet away from it. Putting your feet on the edge, you hesitate as you could feel the cold breeze wrap around you legs. "I'm gonna go now."
"Yippy," he states, waiting at your poor attempts to convince him.
Giving him a thumbs up, you clap your hands together to try to reassure yourself that you could do this, forgetting that he was right behind you secretly laughing.
Taking one final breath, you placed your right foot on top of the ice steadily, trying your best not to make any harsh movements, until you felt a hard jerk on your upper body, making you lose yourself in an instant.
"God, if you don't know how to skate why would you suggest it?" Yoongi grumbled, gliding both your bodies along the ice as he held tightly onto your arms. You were practically skating like a wet dog in front of him, begging with your eyes for him not to abandon you.
"I always wanted to try."
Sending you an annoyed look, you zipped your mouth as his arms were now securing you, closing any gaps there may have been and giving you the ride of your life.
Shutting your eyes harshly, you didn't dare to witness the environment around as you felt the icy wind slap your face the faster you two- or at least by Yoongi's swaying, got.
There were times where he did pretend to lose his balance, causing you to cry in horror and him immediately placing his hand over your mouth by how loud you weaped.
But other than that, you came to enjoy his help as your two other friends rudely abandoned you guys in order to practice their poor attempts of leaping across the rink.
"Okay," Yoongi started, releasing his left hand from your side and keeping you close with only his other. "Now you try on your own."
Fear creeping up in your face, you rapidly shake your head in disagreement and try catching his recent abandoned arm, which he denied. "I can't."
"Can't or won't?" he countered back making you silent.
He did have a point.
"C'mon, it's not that hard. If Joon could do it, you can."
"He's literally on the ground right now," you whine as Yoongi quickly averts his eyes in search of your tall friend, soon finding Joon clutching his knee in pain as Jules records on her phone.
"No."
Sighing, he continues to look around, trying to plan out an idea that would at least convince you to slide a few feet alone without his help until he smirked and met your eyes.
"What would Matt Healy do?"
Widening your eyes, you were taken back by his question.
Only Pedro used that line on you.
And for some reason it felt odd when Yoongi did the same. You shouldn't be bothered by his choice of words...but you were a little.
He wasn't him to be saying it.
"He wouldn't force me to do something I didn't want to do," you reply back, causing him to groan.
"I feel like you just want to be in my arms," he retorted with a grin, immediately making you revolt and fly out of his arms, your bottom hitting the ice hard. "Well that's one way to make you skate."
Feeling immediate pain on the back of your thighs, you just knew you were going to be bruised and swollen the next day. But hey, this technically counts for your workout for the week.
Awkwardly swaying your body around, you couldn't get up off the damn ice. You were sure you looked like a fish out of water by how crazy you were moving.
"Get on your knees," Yoongi commented, causing you to send him a death glare as he lifted his hands up in defense. "It helps you stand."
Or he could just grab your arms and help you himself.
Cautiously following his suggestion, you slowly pull your right leg up and place it firmly on the ice before slowly trying to do so with your left one. As you began to feel satisfied with the weight being supported, you felt your body finally working and lifting up off the ground before he poked your shoulder- making you fall again.
"I'm going to murder you!" you threaten as you stare at him on your back, whole body restlessly laying on the ground in misery as he cackles loudly.
He may have advantage on the ice, but oh man- once you regain your balance off it you were going to end that slender man's life.
"Isn't this just a sight to see," you heard someone exclaim before hands grab your arms and soon lift you back on your feet.
Moving your eyes to the ones in front of you, you burst out in smiles. "Bella! Nico!"
"I take this as my queue to leave,'" you hear Yoongi mumbles but you swiftly grab his arm from his close proximity and halt his plans.
He was not going to desert you now.
"What are you girls doing here?"
Not seeing them for a few weeks didn't make things awkward, but different. It was like catching up with old friends, even though you barely met them less than three months ago.
"Had nothing to do tonight so why not ice skate?" Nico giggled.
Bella examined you up and down before pointing at your head. "My god, your hair grew so long. Has it really been that long?"
Rolling your eyes, you were about to answer her before Yoongi cut in. "No, it's her fake extenstions."
Gasping, you turn your body to him and smack his shoulder as he smacks you back. One thing about him, he's all about equality. You touch him, he touches you- simple.
You don't see the way Nico and Bella exchange smirks to one another before Nico slides in front of you and pulls out her phone. "We should take a selfie! You know, for memories."
Laughing, you agree. You took some pictures with them but never really out of the work environment.
Uncomfortably standing still, Yoongi hastily moves to the side a bit, not wanting to intrude this moment you were having with your friends. He was a pretty sociable person, but only if they had things in common and he fairly knew them.
Yoongi didn't know these two young girls and he sure as hell didn't want to be the one being kicked out of this picture- so why not kick himself out first?
"Where are you going, we need your long arm to get us all in the frame!" Bella exclaimed, motioning Yoongi to move back as he sent her a flustered glance.
"I can just take it with the three of you."
"Nonsense!" Nico argued back, shaking her head as you giggled. "We don't leave people out."
Biting his bottom lip a bit, he scratches the back of his neck swiftly before increasing the speed of his skates to the girl, accepting her phone. "I suppose."
Fixing your posture, you stand behind your friend as he carefully raises his right arm up in the air, positioning the phone that was able to capture all four of you in the frame.
Pulling out the gummiest smile, you bursted out a gigantic grin after seeing the rare radiant expression Yoongi was giving. He was never one to show much emotion so finding him giving in for a picture amused you.
Taking the phone out of his hands, Bella examined the screen before chuckling. "Wow, you've got one adorable smile."
You could've sworn you saw Yoongi blush as he lowered his head while shaking off her compliment, trying to act natural but he wasn't fooling anyone.
He was shy.
Gasping at the sight in front of her, Nico pointed at the concession cart near one of the exits of the ice. "They have hot cocoa! We must get some."
Faking a groan, Bella allowed her friend to drag her away but not before sending you a pout to follow, which you were happy to do. You were freezing to death without even realizing it until you stopped your attempts to skate for the picture.
"I was promised a free cup," Yoongi stated as he was gliding behind you, softly pushing your back as you proceeded to do nothing but allow him to direct you to where your desired hot cocoa was.
Scoffing a little, you shush him as you reached the exit ramp. Jumping off, the two of you slowly waddled to Bella and Nico who were next in line.
"Wait," you start, pausing your footsteps which resulted in him almost falling after slamming to your side. "Shouldn't we ask Joon and Jules if they want one?"
Peeking over your shoulder, Yoongi looks back down to you. "Nah, don't wanna ruin their fun."
Following his recent glance, you could see Joon and Jules in front of one another, both holding hands as they try to catch a faster pace while twirling in big circles.
You were sure they were eventually going to knock a small child over soon.
"Next," you hear the worker call out, sitting behind his register waiting for your arrival.
Quickly walking up, you place your order as nothing else but the hot drinks seemed to interest you. The total came out to be the cost as what four drinks at your local cafe would be, but you shouldn't be surprised since this place was pretty popular to the public.
Pulling out his wallet so fast, you didn't have to process what Yoongi was doing until you caught the view of his credit card as he handed it over to the man in front of you.
"No-" you try intercepting what had just happened by giving your card to the worker who just shrugged as he had already paid for the drinks on Yoongi's card. "Why would you do that?"
"You're too slow," Yoongi bluntly said as he grabbed the two drinks and moved to the side so the next person in line could place their order.
"But it hadn't even been three seconds since he said the total before you handed him the card," you protest.
He handed you your cup, hoping it'll shut you up as he took a small sip from his own. "And?"
Is he being serious? "'And,'" you question as he continued to be unaware as to what you were getting at. "Since the beginning I vowed to buy you hot cocoa."
Yoongi laughed at how stubborn you were becoming. "Vowed? What a great word choice for this scenario, fiance."
Rolling your eyes at his teasing, you hated the fact he was avoiding your question. You knew he did it because he wanted to be a gentleman, but the problem was he didn't want to admit he was one.
Again, he was being shy.
"I see you are kind," you smirk as he gave you a disgusted glance. "Don't worry, I won't tell people you have a heart."
Before he could leave a snarky comeback, Nico and Bella came back in giggles as Yoongi retreated back to his natural state of looking lifeless. "Oh my gosh- we went to get napkins and I kid you not I may have poured my drink on the back of this poor little girl."
Lightly gasping, you widen your eyes as Yoongi confusingly replies back. "May have? You don't know if you did or not?"
Bella makes an accountable face, scrunching her nose in the process. "Okay, I did. But she's the one who ran into me!"
"Well, she was really small and you kind of didn't search your surroundings before kneeing her," Nico exposed, causing Yoongi and you to give each other a concerned look.
"You kneed her?!"
"Only in her side," Bella excused herself, sending Nico a betrayed look. "It wasn't like it was her stomach."
"It practically was...," Nico mumbled but became silent when her co-star eyed her hard.
Coughing uncomfortably, Yoongi caught everyone's attention as he tried to avert the conversation into something that wasn't as horrific as striking a child with hot cocoa and a knee. "We should probably hit the ice again soon before Jules and Joon find out we got these drinks without them."
"Jules is here?!" Bella beamed, searching around for her through the large gatherings of people on the ice. "I missed that crazy lady, she was the only one who would get my coffee order right."
"She told me she would threaten to get the baristas fired if they kept getting it wrong," Nico recalled, chewing her mouth a little. "That's why I stopped letting her take my orders."
Sighing, you looked up in the ceiling in disapproval as you could feel Yoongi laughing his ass off beside you. That was very Jules of her to do.
After another two hours of trying to figure out how to skate, and basically latching onto Yoongi the whole time as Bella and Nico were doing laps around you guys, you finally made it home.
To say you were exhausted would be an understatement- you were drained.
No, seriously. You hadn't worked out this much since Jules and you almost missed the subway two months ago and had to run three blocks to catch it on time.
That day was dreadful, but you were sure if you went to bed you were going to wake up lifeless like a worm.
"I call the shower first!" you hear Jules scream, running to her room in order to grab her belongings but you were faster and instantly made your way to the bathroom, locking the door before she could break in. "You bitch! How dare you steal it with my back turned!"
Grinning evilly to yourself, you wanted to get your night routines over with so you could hit the pillows quickly. Even after taking off all your makeup, taking a very steamy shower, and doing your nightly skin care routine, you were sure you could easily knock out sitting on the toilet if you had the chance.
We all have done it once in our lives.
Opening the door, the steam flows out smoothly as you face your very displeased roommate on the other side, glaring at you. "All yours," you smile, stepping to the side but she roughly pushes you in response, causing you to yelp as you manage to catch your balance midway.
Mental note, burn her eggs next breakfast.
Stepping into your room, you change into an oversized hoodie and sweats before throwing yourself under your covers in excitement.
The moment you've been waiting for all day: sleep.
Closing your eyes, you feel all your senses slowly drifting away from your body as relaxation crept up from all around. It was truly intoxicating how in trance you were.
But of course with your luck, nothing goes as planned- ever.
Wildly jumping up from the loud blaring of your phone, you cover your face in agony as the vibrations and noise cause pain throughout your entire body.
Who the hell was calling you at 10 o'clock at night? This should be illegal.
After taking a minute to control yourself, the ringing stopped. Good, now you won't have to make time to engage in a conversation. Quickly falling back down onto your pillows, it wasn't even ten seconds later before you feel your phone going off like crazy again.
With you eyes shut, you move your hands around your bed until you feel the cool object underneath your pillow. Lazily pressing any button, without batting one eye open, you move the phone to your ear before releasing a groggy, "What?"
"What a lovely way to greet somebody, kiddo."
You instantly freeze, automatically thinking about the vivid dream you had about him, then Lady Gaga, and felt a blush creeping in.
Slowly pulling the phone away, you let out a loud but fast scream before moving it back. How the hell are you going to begin a conversation without thinking about his lips on yours. "What do you want?"
Pausing for a second, you can hear him move around through his end. "Did you just scream?"
It's not like you didn't just dream about him kissing all over your body two nights ago.
"Did you just wake me up to ask me the obvious answer?"
Act like you don't care. Like you are perfectly fine.
He chuckles lightly and you can tell by his tone he was close to passing out too. "Somebody's cranky, is it past your bedtime?" Pedro teased.
You were definitely not in the mood to handle his ridicules at this hour, especially by how nervous he was slowly making you. What did he want?
"Yes," you simply reply before hitting the red button, ending the call and laying your head back on your pillow. Good, just end it before you make a bigger fool out of yourself.
It hadn't even been another ten seconds before your phone was ringing once again. Pulling it up to your face, you let out a huff. What a shocker, it was him again.
"You better have an insanely good reason as to why you chose to wake me up in the middle of my dream," you immediately say as you press the 'accept' button.
Hearing him laugh, you just know he has a sarcastic comment coming any second. "Wake you up? Honey, you're still living your dream talking to me."
Honey.
No, not another nickname for him to call you in future dreams.
Shaking that thought away, you rejected the idea of him being in any more dreams- you forbid it.
Loss at words for a second, you almost let your next words trip over one another before calmly gaining your composure at the incidental choice of your pet name.
"So funny," you reply back, trying your best to sound sane. "Pretty sure I was dreaming of a very shirtless Matt Healy playing 'Please Be Naked' to me."
Why the fuck would you slip that out.
"Are you trying to hint at something?" he smirks, making you press mute and hold your hand over your mouth to hold back the screams you feared would release.
Feeling like your soul was about to leave your body, you couldn't believe he just said that.
Actually, you couldn't believe you would even recommend that song. God, your sleepiness was messing with your mind.
Finding your energy once again, you unmute the call and try to seem unfazed by his last comment. "Yes, that I want to sleep. Goodbye now."
Before you could hit the red button again, you could hear him chanting over the phone to do the exact opposite. "Don't!"
Groaning, you clutch the phone harder in despair. "I am so tired. Don't do this to me, please. I am a girl who values her sleep!" you whine as you hear him continue his light giggles in the background. "If I don't sleep I will die, is this what you want. Are you trying to kill me?"
"I can reassure you I don't plan on keeping you up long," he explains. "And I wouldn't dare wish for your death."
Your heart fluttering, you glare at your chest. "Then what do you want?"
Moving his phone from one ear to the other, he lays in his bed while smiling at his ceiling. "You," he declares, making you widen your eyes as he shuffles around in his blanket. "Tomorrow, let's hang out."
Sitting up against your bed frame, you furrow your brow. "Hang out? For what?" There's no way you will be able to act normal for a long period of time, your weak-self can't do it.
Placing a hand over his chest, he lets out a light hiss in fake hurt by your comeback before continuing. "Can't I hang out with you by choice and not by a work schedule? Unless you're so disgusted by me." That's when he started his fake cries. "I'm so sorry I am not Matt Healy and can't do a great British accent."
Shaking your head, you try to intervene as his ugly cries become louder through the line. "That's not what I meant, stop being dramatic," you complain as he instantly stops while smiling widely. "Is there a specific reason why you want to hang out?"
Taking a deep breath, he fiddles with the fingers on his non-occupied hand. "Does there need to be a reason?"
You pause for a second. He's acting too kind for your liking and it's making you question what his intentions are. In this point of time, you're sure he's going to take that moment to convince you to work with him in Canada.
"With you there's always a reason."
Scoffing lightly, he grumbles. "I just want to go on a hike and need a hiking partner."
Oh hell no, you already did enough working out this evening. You were not about to do that again, that's for sure.
"Yeah, nooo," you exhale lowly. "I already did too much working out with my body if you know what I mean and-"
"I don't know what that means," he cuts you off.
"It means I am going to be sore for days so my body has no strength to walk for more than five minutes," you declare as he falls silent.
After a few seconds that felt like forever, he replies. "Fine," he blankly states. "Have a goodnight, sweetheart."
The warmth as blood began drawing to your face became present as you quickly reply with a simple "night" before ending the call. And for some reason you felt as if you couldn't breathe normally by the pounding on your chest.
What the hell was happening to you. Looking up at the ceiling, you silently pray you don't have a Lady Gaga 2.0 fiasco.
As you were questioning why your heart made you feel as if you were going under cardiac arrest the night before, your body was currently making you feel if you really needed to make that trip to the ER by how tender you were.
It also didn't help that Jules was the one waking you up at the crack of dawn, half asleep with her eye mask clinging onto her forehead.
"W-why are you-" you grumble, rubbing your eyes as you look at the alarm clock near your bedside. "-waking me up at 6:18am? It's Saturday."
She sent you a death glare for assuming she randomly wanted to wake you up for the fun of it as she was the one who was woken up first. "Someone's here for you."
Positioning your body upwards, you squint your eyes up at her. "What are you talking about?"
"Why don't you take a look for yourself," she gritted her teeth, swaying her head towards your door.
Slowly standing up, you make your way to it before sneaking a peak of the view of your living room. That's when you see a very annoying man you were sure you both agreed on the phone last night to not go hiking.
Luckily, he didn't notice your wandering eyes as his were glued to his phone, scrolling through his social media.
What was he doing here? You can't face him without thinking about his body wrapped around yours and his lips doing dangerous things.
Oh no, you truly were screwed.
Lightly shutting your door, you nervously turn back to your roommate who looks displeased. "I told him no."
"No means yes, I guess," she replies, snaking her arms around her body for warmth. "I'm going back to bed."
You could hear her walk out of your room as you frantically begin searching for something warm yet comfortable clothes to wear on this undesired hike. You knew if you tried backing out he would stay until you caved, he was very persistent to get what he wanted.
And what he wanted was for you to get your ass up and exercise.
You were also certain you heard Jules let out a "thanks for the invite" to him before hearing her bedroom door shut.
Running out of your room, you made sure not to look in his direction so he wouldn't see your morning appearance clearly- well he already has but why reveal yourself in this state again?
Quickly brushing your hair, teeth, and washing your face, you change into a baggy green sweatshirt and some black workout leggings before slipping on suited running shoes.
Try to act natural. Give him little attention so he won't speculate anything. You aren't into old men and did not vision him smooching you on your sofa.
"You are so buying me breakfast," you deadpan as you walked straight out of your door, not even daring to wait for him to follow.
Good, be straightforward.
Laughing to himself, Pedro promptly jumped off the couch and jogged after you once you shut the door on him and continued down the halls to the elevators.
Finally catching up, he barely made it through the elevator doors as they were closing to find you leaning against the corner, mad and tired. "Good morning to you, too."
You let out a small cry as you lay your head against the wall in pain from how frustratingly exhausted you were. If one cold breeze hit you outside you were sure you were going to burst into tears.
"Oh, come one," he walks over to you and nudged your shoulder to wake up some more. If he unexpectedly touched you again you were sure you were going to rip his arm off. "In a few minutes you'll be wide awake and fine."
"How dare you assume I'm going to be fine!" you whine, trying to hit his side but he manages to capture your arm and that's when you give up and allow your worn out body to fall on him.
He instantly wraps his arms around you as your head falls just beneath his chin, your eyes slowly closing and your thoughts drifting away as his warmth was making you drowsy.
You tried to stay focus, but your poor state was taking over and you suddenly weren't as anxious as you once were. Being sleepy really made your mind roam.
"Hey, now," he whispers and looks down to see you snuggling up against him. "You can't fall asleep on me. I do not want your security guards thinking I drugged you."
Tightening your arms on how lower sides, you ignore him as you feel yourself easing closer to dozing off by the constant beating of his heart. "Stop," you mumble, clutching your ears softly before positioning your head on the other side of his chest.
"What?" he curiously glances down at you.
"You heartbeat's annoying me," you lightly whine. "It's pounding against my ears."
Pedro was extremely glad you were too tired to process his heartbeat and the bright red tint plastered across his face. Your drained-self definitely saved him from embarrassment.
Finally, the elevator doors opened and you still weren't moving. You were too comfortable to make any effort to walk on your own and if he really wanted you to hang out this morning then he was going to have to find a way to make you move.
And to him, dragging you was his best option yet. But with care.
Delicately keeping his arms secured around you, he gradually walked out with you still engulfed by him, eyes shut and only moving your feet with his pace.
Honestly, you were surprised how much rhythm you had.
Stopping to pull out his car keys, he unlocked his car and opened his passenger side door once you two reached the garage complex. Gently, laying you on the seat, you station you head against the headrest as he buckled you in. "God, I really hope security doesn't report me."
And once he made it to his side and hopped in, he laughed at the state you were in, head instantly bent to your side and legs tangled together in hope to create some kind of warmth. "Adorable."
But of course you were too dumb to not catch that.
You were awoken by a small speed bump and the instant hit of warmth through the heat vents, your eyes slowly glancing around your surroundings. Taking a quick peep at the screen indicating the time, you read that it was almost 7am.
Tilting your head and leaning against the headrest, you lazily stare at Pedro as he continues to drive to god knows where.
"Don't I look so handsome in the morning?" he jokes before meeting your eyes, sending you a warm grin.
And handsome on top of you.
Shutting your eyes tightly, you beg your imagination to please shut the fuck up.
"You mean drastic," you mutter, moving your head to the opposite side, against the window to force some sleep again.
Better to make time fly by faster knocking out where you were sure you wouldn't say anything stupid.
"Hey, no..." he whines, moving his right arm across to shake your chin softly to keep you conscious. "Don't pass out on me again, I'm lonely."
"And I'm tired, deal with it."
Shuffling in his seat, he looks over to see you curling yourself up in a ball with your legs to your knees and arms wrapped around. Not thinking things throughly, he hits the brakes hard for a split second and watches as your body jolts forward before swinging back against his seat.
"What the fuck!" you shriek, propping your body up and facing him in pure rage. "Are you trying to irritate me?!"
"I'm lonely and you're not helping," Pedro calmly states, shrugging as you continue your daggers his way.
You were beyond pissed. How could he think you would be energetic and talkative right now? How could he attempt to make you fly out the window? You could feel your nerves slowly fading away by the fury growing inside you.
If he wanted you awake then fine, you were going to be awake.
Doesn't mean you had to talk though.
Silently sitting up, you stare at the windshield in front of you and watch the cars drive as he continues to spare you a glance every once in a while.
Honestly, your silence was terrifying the fuck out of him. Normally, you would have some snarky comeback or violent punch to return to his evil tactics, but you were doing nothing.
Literally nothing.
And he knows damn well the sights of trees and cars did not interest you.
"Hey...," you feel Pedro lightly poke your side, pursing his lips once he saw your non-existent reaction. "You're not mad, right?"
Ignoring him, you continue your deep stare now onto more trees as you two were getting closer to nature than streets. You must've been out for some time as you barely noticed how far away from the city you really were.
Joon would really love this.
Gradually lifting his arm up, his places it on top of your own and gives it a small squeeze while laying it there. "C'mon, don't ignore me."
As if that would make you stop your scheme.
Blinking slowly, you acted like you paid no attention to his puppy dog pleads as the car was making its way towards an almost empty parking lot, all surrounded by a forest that only had one route starting within an old wooden bridge.
Pulling up to a nearby parking spot, Pedro parked the car before turning back to try and capture your attention but nothing was working.
You were so damn frustrating, it was infuriating. But he was still desperate to gain your attention.
"Are you just going to sit in here all day or what?" he questions as he waves a hand over your face to make you blink.
You didn't and that kind of frightened him. Work of the devil.
"I am going to cry," he warned, swatting his hand over his face to prepare for his fake tears.
Yet you showed no mercy. Sitting there patiently, you inhaled and exhaled softly, causing him to internally flip the fuck out because why were you being so aggravating when the two of you should be walking and pointing out the squirrels fighting over nuts.
And sadly, he was slowly giving up.
"Imagine if I really was crying," he began, offended you did not care one bit. "Really means a lot how unconcerned you are."
But when you suddenly started examining your nails and carefully picking at them is when he totally lost it.
Reaching over to you and moving his arm down your arm, he swiftly intertwined your fingers with his before moving you posture to face him.
His hand was huge.
"No, no-" he started, pulling a face as you gave him a blank stare back. Act natural. Pulling your shared hands in front of his chest, he sulks. "-please, for the love of whichever god you believe in, or if you're an atheist- for the love of you, please talk to me."
Watching him beg for forgiveness has always been funny in the past, but his pleading for attention now makes you feel bad.
"If you talk to me I will buy you breakfast and a very delicious milkshake that will make you extremely happy for the rest of the day," he continues, using his free left arm to wrap around you as his right one still clutches onto your palm.
He's so warm.
Pursing your lips a bit, you send him a skeptical glance. "Oreo shake with a lot of whipped cream?"
He instantly nods, a smile breaking out. "Of course, anything you want."
You look at the car's steering wheel before averting your eyes back to his. "And a red cherry?"
"I'll buy you a full jar of cherries if it makes you happy," he declares.
"And fries?"
Agreeing, he lets out a quick nod again. "With extra seasoning."
Biting your lip, you proceed to think about other stuff you may want with your milkshake and fries. "A burger?"
"My goodness, woman" he sighs, letting go of you and jumping out of the car before running around to your side and opening your door. "I'll buy you the whole menu, now let's go!"
With that, he vigorously yet cautiously pulls you out of your seat and throws you over his shoulders.
"Oh no!" you squeal, trying to find something to hold on to as he begins his journey, walking towards the bridge to start the hike. Grabbing a hold of his neck, you try not to choke him as you place your arm around it.
If you were going down, you were sure you were going to break his neck in the process. At least it would be a learning lesson for him.
"If you drop me I am never talking to you again," you threaten as he continues down a path.
"Said that before and just did it half the car ride here," he begins, moving his shoulder to give you a little fright of your life. "Now I just found out that all I have to do is buy you food and you'll yap again."
Glaring, you choke him a little to which he chuckles. "Didn't know you were into that."
Speechless, you couldn't believe his words. What the hell was he on this morning?
"Put me down!" you exclaim, immediately moving your body so he would lose his balance. Once he did so, you scowl as he ruffles your hair, making it tangle around. "Hey!"
"Can you stop being negative for a few minutes and enjoy the environment?" he asks, pulling his arms up to twirl around. "Just take in that fresh air mother nature gifted us."
Scrunching your nose, you frown. "It smells like rotten eggs."
"Because of the ducks," he pointed out before patting his pockets. "Which we will be feeding with the bread I brought."
Examining his pocket, you shoot him a curious glance. "How big are your pockets?"
"Not important," he states, grabbing your arms and dragging you along with him down the long trail. "What's important is finishing this trail to feel accomplished."
Pouting, you allowed him to drag you along as you miserably dreaded the next few hours to come. The energy you had to give off just for some damn breakfast.
Shame on you for loving food so much.
Encountering many frogs, lizards, and pigeons who loved flying right by both of your heads and scaring you to death, you had long forgotten about how anxious you were being around him. Being distracted constantly had you occupied which was a relief.
Eventually, you two finally found the drugs.
Or the ducks.
Walking by a huge pond, there were numerous amounts of ducks leaping around with their families following behind. It was really cute, but the smell wasn't.
"I wonder if they can choke on this?" Pedro muttered as he pulled out a large bread. Slowly nearing one medium-seized one in caution, he rips a piece apart and throws it. "It is kind of thick."
Taking a moment to check the bread out, you sigh. "Are you feeding these ducks bolillo bread?"
He pauses, not sure why you would care to ask. "Yes and?"
"They have thick crusts!" you exclaim. "And why not just feed them normal wheat bread?"
"Who even eats wheat? It's bland." he protests. "Plus, this is leftovers from my dinner last night."
"They're ducks! They don't care," you argue as he shakes his head.
"Just imagine if you were a duck," he began, making you huff in annoyance as you just knew he was going to say something ridiculous. "Wouldn't you love to eat this nice bolillo bread, maybe visualize a torta with some carnitas, onions, avocado, can't forget the refried bean-"
"The duck is choking!" you squeal and stare in fear as the poor duck starts to wheeze sharply.
Pedro's facial expressions drops as he sees the poor duck quacking in agony. Nervously rushing to its side, he looks up at you. "Do we pat its back? CPR? Call 911?!"
Pulling out your phone, you type away to find answers for your current problem. It was indeed true that you aren't supposed to feed ducks bread.
Especially thick Mexican ones.
"Give it mouth to mouth if you want chlamydia," you read aloud, causing Pedro to instantly leap away from the duck as it hastily begins to lay on the ground. "Wait, you get that from birds, not ducks. Silly me."
"Ducks are birds," he discloses, trying his best to softly pat the ducks back, finally giving it one powerful swat to help but instead the duck ends ups being thrown a few feet away by his force.
"Do I look like a fucking duck doctor?" you spit out, making him look up confused.
"You mean a veterarian."
Ignoring his last comment, you continue scrolling through more of google's suggestions, finally finding some information that may help. "You need to press down on its chest with 1-2 fingers or just give them water to drown it down."
Immediately grabbing the duck and placing it on its back, you worriedly watch over the duck from Pedro's shoulder as he works his fingers on the poor animal.
However, no luck was given as the duck was beginning to look weak and drowsy as pressure kept being projected on its chest. "We need water!"
Running towards the pond, you motion for Pedro to follow along with the duck as you look for a safe ramp to lead the duck onto. "Let's just lay him down near the water and splash him with it."
"He?" Pedro asks, stopping his movements. "But it looks like a she-"
"We are not arguing over its gender when its literally dying in your arms!" you exclaim, causing him to quickly nod and follow the ramp you found towards the water.
Gently, Pedro lowered his arms near the water with the poor duck taking over his hands. Trying to move the flow of water towards its face, he calls you over. "He's not accepting it, you need to scoop some up in your hand and pour it over his beak."
Rapidly nodding, you do as he says and take a handful and try not to spill it before gradually pouring it over the duck's beak. This water was not clean, but at least it was something. Nothing was happening until your third scoop once the duck began to actually swallow some of the water slowly.
"I-I think it's working! We did it!" Pedro cheered, trying to give you a high-five, failing incredibly as he somehow managed to lose his grip and dump the poor duck hard in the pond. "Oh shit!"
Squatting down, you try to reach for the duck as its face was buried underneath the water before Pedro's body slams into yours, causing you to fall into the dirty, cold pond.
The feeling of thick, muddy water overtakes your body as you lose all sight of air. Quickly moving your arms up and down, you rise back to the surface to find Pedro with his hands over his mouth and his jaw dropped.
He knew he wasn't going to hear the end of it.
"Fuck," he nervously muttered to himself before reaching out for you. "I am so so so sorry, the leaf made me slip AH!-"
He couldn't finish his sentence as you yanked his arm down with you, pulling with almighty to get him to land in the pond. The weight of the water going down with his body diving harshly against it, you knew he was completely soaked.
And probably pissed, but its okay. It's what he deserves.
Waiting for him to come up, he finally did so in seconds looking very unhappy. It made you delighted.
"You did that on purpose!"
Scoffing, you splash him and watch as he gasps harder. "You do a lot of things on purpose."
Using both hands to release bigger waves, he splashes you back. "Don't splash me!"
Growling, you slap his chest as he clutches your wrist afterwards. "You're so lucky I forgot my phone at home."
Gasping, you feel one of his hands fly underwater. "I didn't!" You hold in your giggles as he shuffles frantically before moving his gaze back up. "Wait, I never removed it from my glove department. Be fortunate I forgot it because if you destroyed it I would've made you walk home."
Furrowing your brows, you push his shoulders and make him move back by the force of it. "You're the one who started it. We're gonna get duck chlamydia now!"
Rolling his eyes, he pushed you back, causing you to fall under the water. Once you caught your breath again you notice the way he glares at you. "That's not even a thing."
"Just another STD to add to your list," you jokingly mumble to yourself, sure he didn't catch it.
You were wrong, again.
Launching himself onto you, the two of you fall underwater as he shoves you body around in revenge. Swimming back up, you gasp for air while slapping his arms off you as he tried blocking all your attempts.
Wrapping his arms around your waist, he clings his face on your shoulder as he proceeds to try and bring you down under but somehow you manage to wrap your leg around his thigh, causing him to lose his strength and fall backwards with you on top of him.
He sure has one strong grip.
Now, not saying you were going to kill him. But this was your chance to kill him with no witnesses.
Well- besides the ducks, but they wouldn't quack a soul.
Regaining his energy, he lifts himself back up and holds you up, about to drag you under again before you crazily oppose while shaking your head, "Don't! We're gonna get sick!"
"That's not a very sincere apology," he tilts his head, his wet hair scattered across his face as he awaits your alibi.
Huffing, you fight back a rude remark. "Do you understand how much poop were swimming in right now? These ducks are probably laughing at us by how much they are quacking."
Swiftly looking around, the two of you check the surrounding ducks around who blankly stare back. The older looking ones hollering nonsense, probably making plans to kill you and Pedro.
"I bet their releasing their chlamydia right now," you cry, hiding your face in his shoulder as he bursts out laughing.
"I don't think that's how it works."
Glancing down on him, you're surprised by his strength. He's been holding you up by your waist for so long you're shocked he hasn't dropped you accidentally yet. "Let's not find out, let's get out."
"You're forgetting something," he smiles, staring innocently at you, knowing damn well you can't leave without his release. "And I wouldn't wait this one out because I am pretty sure I feel toads swimming near my feet."
Instantaneously, you clung onto him tighter in fear as you could imagine the feeling of something swarming around your body. It was like hundred of spiders crawling all over you, you needed to get out of here.
Pulling yourself back up, you place your hands on his shoulders as he impassively stares back at you, waiting. "Fine," you huff. "I'm sorry for claiming you had STD's before."
Pedro just stays there, not moving an inch as if he wants more. Groaning, you knew he wasn't going to give in so easy. "And I am sorry for stimulating the idea that you would get duck chlamydia," you apologize. "But you can get E. coli."
That didn't help as he just helplessly eyed you, not impressed with your poor excuses of your so-called apologies. What more did he want? You can't necessarily beg on your knees, you're in the water!
Whining, you knew you had to pull out your sincere face. You just knew your Oscar-worthy acting was about to award you freedom.
Softly, you move strands of hair stuck near his eyes away from his face and brush his hair back before quivering your lips and looking down upon him in sorrow.
He has really pretty eyes.
"I'm really sorry," you start as you push your face inside his neck and lock him inside your arms. "I know you don't have any infections, you don't even have visible rashes or sores to prove it."
Pedro finds your plead for forgiveness charming as you squeeze him tighter. He begins to release you until he hears the mutter of your "-that are visible."
"You couldn't hold it in for a few more seconds?!" he whined at how fast you went back to insulting him.
Sighing heavily, you slap a hand to your face. "It's hard!"
Suppressing a laugh, he unwrapped his arms around you and let you get back to the sidewalk. But once you were back on your feet, you looked down to find your body filled with random pieces of dirt, sticks, and grass. "Ew!"
"You're not sitting in my car," Pedro states, waving his head side to side to release some water from his ears.
"You're worse than me!"
"My car, my rules."
Frowning, you weren't sure if he was kidding or not. "Well, you almost committed first-degree-murder so if you don't want people to know you must be my personal servant."
His instant glare turned into confusion as he abruptly moved his attention back towards the pond. "Where did the duck go?"
Widening your eyes, you forgot that you had a helpless duck in your hands minutes ago before your splash attack with Pedro. Scanning your eyes from the sidewalks to the ramps to the pond, you noticed a duck floating nearby. "I think that's them."
Pointing at a duck with the closest familiar colors than the rest, you felt Pedro let out of sigh of relief. "Thank goodness, I would have felt extremely guilty if she would have died."
"It could be a he," you snap back.
He was about to protest but honestly, you were done for the day. You just wanted to take a long and hot shower and knock back out. Not only that, but you ruined your cute running shoes you gifted yourself months ago for your work out journey.
You never really wore them, but it's the thought that counts.
"We can get breakfast another day," you plead to which he didn't argue over because he really wanted to remove the unknown substances off his body asap.
He wouldn't admit it, but he was genuinely scared he may have gotten duck chlamydia .
"Okay, but no sleeping in the car," Pedro states as you exhale loudly. All this and you still weren't allowed to doze off, how cruel is life at the moment.
Walking back to the car would've went down smoothly if the two of you weren't given disturbed looks from strangers and your clothes weren't clinging uncomfortably to your bodies, especially your shoes.
Luckily, Pedro had towels in his trunk and set them down on the seats. "God, I am definitely going to need a deep cleaning after this."
Slipping inside, your hands find the heater and turn it on full blast. Not only was it freezing outside, but your drenched state made you feel like an icicle.
Setting off back to the road, your mind begins to wander back to the question that has been flooding your mind lately. Craning you neck towards his presence, you make out his comfort state. Cool, he's calm.
Here goes nothing.
"So," you start, awkwardly playing with your hands as you try to make direct eye-contact with him as he turns his head to you. "Why did you visit the other morning?"
Lifting a brow, he pulls a face. "Other morning?"
Biting the inside of the cheek, you try to sound composed. "Yeah, remember? You dropped by around 6am-"
"-and you thought I was Lady Gaga, slammed the door on my face, and went back to bed?" he finished, grinning while finding your eyes again. "You mean that day?"
"Well if you knew what I was talking about why make me recall those mortifying details?" you grumble, leaning back against your seat. "And I thought you were a cat."
"I figured, I always questioned why Jules would ramble on about buying Lady Gaga a new electric litter box until I connected the dots," he confessed making you let out a small chuckle.
Yeah, you clearly remember how upset Jules became when Lady Gaga neglected the expensive box.
"But if you're curious, it wasn't because I wanted to go hiking," he smiled, referring to the current day.
"Then why?"
He paused for a minute, checking his mirrors before switching lanes. "I'm not really sure."
Tilting your head a bit, you express curiosity as you glance back. "I don't understand?"
Laughing lowly, he slightly shook his head. "I did wake up real fucking early that day," he started. "Maybe around 4am? Which sucked because I must've gotten like 3-4 hours of sleep."
"So you decided to wake me up so I could feel your pain?"
"No," he stifled another chuckle. "To plant trees."
Squinting your eyes, you become very confused. What is he talking about? He noticed your puzzlement immediately. "You know, go early in the morning to different areas in the city and help dig and replace old trees to plant new ones."
This whole time you were flipping out, wondering why he randomly came early in the morning just to find out it was because he's a nature boy who wants to help out the community?
It was very sweet of him to be as helpful as he was, but you were a little disappointment it wasn't something more.
"That's why?" you ask and he nods. "And why no warning?"
"Well, I was going to call but I figured all that studying you had done the evening before may have knocked you out early," he confessed.
Yet he still made you wake up early today knowing damn well you were exhausted last night. Strange.
"Why me?" you giggle. "I'm not your typical nature girl, Joon would've been perfect for the job."
Shrugging, he leaned his elbow on his middle console. "I thought about asking him, but to be honest I didn't want to pay for any damages he may have caused."
That was a very accurate insight of what Joon really was, clumsy. The amount of times he accidentally dropped his coffee cups, tripped over wires backstage, and face-planted against glass doors would be too much to count on both your palms.
You're surprised he hasn't broken his back again- but still glad he hasn't. That would really suck.
"But have you thought things over yet?" Pedro glanced your way before looking back forward. "About Canada?"
Stiffing up a bit, you move your eyes to the dashboard. You weren't dreading this conversation, but you didn't want to talk about it.
This was a situation where it was a win but also a loss.
Win as in gaining incredible experience, loss that your parent's wouldn't be pleased, it was in a different country, and you'd be missing out on your social life for almost a year.
"Not really," you admit and sense from the corner of your eyes his shoulders fall. "Still indecisive, as always," you try joking to lighten the mood.
Sending over a tiny grin, he mirrors your same expression, doubtful. His face turns concentrated again, leaning closer to you before he shuts down again, ultimately rejecting whatever idea he had going on.
The rest of the drive back to your place went by fast. The two of you made little talk about each other's life and how school was going for you, but he already knew so much already from past encounters.
Pulling up to the red curb you loathe, you crack a scowl as he only returns a smirk at his doing. "I will personally send my property manager to you so she can threaten you."
"I do love threats," he beamed, watching as you reach for the handle before stopping you by his voice. "-but I had fun this morning, despite our little uh...catastrophe," he chuckled, looking down at his clothes.
"I totally agree," you grin. "Dirt just looks so good on me."
He sniggers lightly before slightly sobering up. "But seriously, think about the offer," he begins, nipping at his lip a bit, not trying to put too much pressure on you. "It'll be good for you, you know- your future."
Sighing, you nod. You knew where he was coming from since he's been doing this for so long, but you were still young and had a lot on your mind.
"I'll think about it," you smile, reaching for the door handle and swiftly getting out, missing the way his smile slowly vanishes.
Taking your usual step back, you send him a farewell wave but he does his habitual goodbyes as he gets out of his car and grins to you. "See you around." Laughing, you walk inside the doors and make your way to the elevators, his followed soft "beautiful" being muffled by the traffic on the streets.
It seemed like both of you were screwed.
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taglist: @thesapphirequeen @floralsightings @wrathofcats @avengersheart @fafik7 @chimchimjiminie16 @adriennemichelle98
#pedro pascal#pedro pascal fanfiction#pedro pascal imagine#pedro pascal x reader#pedro pascal x y/n#pedro pascal x you#joel miller#tlou#tlou joel#pascalispunk#joel miller x reader#the last of us#pedro pascal angst#pedro pascal fluff#pedropascaledit#fanfiction
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ANOTHER AGENT 4 X OC FANFICTION YES WAITER, THATS THE GOOD STUFF
SO the idea was "what if Four has a writers block" and then it kinda turned into... this! Yeah! I acutally wrote this during my works break so its not too long but i think it turned out fine.
these bitches gay, good for them.... good for them 👏👏👏👏
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Four sighs, her head burried in her hands. It was so boring. Boring. B-o-r-i-n-g. Writing an essay about some topic she couldn't care less about. It feels all too much like a drag, and one in which she makes next to no progress. Dull, bland, boring. On and on it goes... It's not that she's bad at school or anything, but her mind just does not allow for her to really think into that direction.
Wait. So maybe that's the issue? She is distracted! Four claps her hands, then her cheeks, looking determined at the almost blank paper (because all she wrote tis far was the date and the name).
"Ok, first I need to make sure I understand that and then..." She tabs the pen against the table, furrowing her eyebrows in concentration. A sigh comes forth. What is up with her? She now allows her thoughts to wander off, after being contained for this entire duration. Haji. Was the first, and literally first thing that blooped into her mind. "Maybe I need to warm up my writing, that's it! I'm so so smart!" The Inkling exclaimed happily over finding the solution of her problem. She streches her hands, rolls her shoulders and locks in on the page. The page still stares back. "Alright let's see-" she says out loud, starting to write. /How come, that everytime I look at you, I can feel the energy, the passion burning brightly, almost never ending?/ Ok so that came out worse than expected, it could be worse... Isn't that a bit too cheesy? But it's not like anyone will read that anyways, it's her own thoughts, nicely packed and hidden away. /I met you at your lowest, you were so different compared on how you are now. But maybe this difference contrasts your beautiful colors even more?/ God, was the writing of her own thoughts becoming awfully easy for her. She couldn't stop now. /Hey, why does it feel like I might be one of the only people, that can truly read you? I know what you're doing, you're putting on a facade for everyone else to see. But somehow, I can see it melting everytime we are with each other./ Something heavy was sitting inside Four's chest, pressing down on her lungs. Why did writing her thoughts always make her breathless and weak? It feels freeing but also unfamiliar to be this vulnerable. /I wish i could actually see what's going on in the head of yours. Seeing if you maybe think the same about me too?/ God! Why is this the first thing she could've come up with. Haji is more interesting than that. /She plays in a band, she's really funny, and a bit of an dork! But she told me to stop calling her that, though I didn't, because she always smilied so radiantly when I did./ Maybe the emotions she kept so bottled up, slowly seeped out and wrote themselves into the paper. / I would like to hug her tightly, so close together and feel her warmth engulfing me in everyway possible./ Something was forming in Four's throat, causing a lump and a horrible uncomfortable sensation. /This reads like a bad bad fanfiction! God ignore the last part please-/ Four exhaled, reading the passage through her head. Was she really feeling so strongly for her friend? Maybe? It certainly was a feeling she did not harbor before. It almost scared her. But not in a scary way, rather in a nervous fluttering and giggle sort of way. /Part of me is scared to ruin this friendship, but I can't help myself, I want to ruin this if it means being honest to you./ /I think, deep down, I already made my decision. But yet, I feel hesitant, spooked even!/ Four puts the pencil down, and allows herself to fall into the chair to rest. Something feels a little heavy about these words... They are true, right? Why couldn't she just say what was on her mind?! Just tell her. That's simple enough. But why does she stop herself before doing so. She couldn't be afraid, she did way more dangerous things before, agent work and all that. But yet this feels massive.
"Wait! My essay!"
She takes the sheet of paper on which she spilled her feelings on, and fold it carefully. it goes into her desk, hidden away safely. She thought of maybe throwing it away, destroying the evidence, if you will. But she couldn't. That wouldn't be right, that would mean lying to herself.
PICTURE WAS MADE BY @glfry THE GOAT THE LEGEND THE ONE AND ONLY
#agent 4#splatoon#oc x canon#SHE LOWKEY DERAILED INTO WRITING A DIARY ENTRY NGL#this is very gay though#agent 4 spills her feelings on a paper instead of doing work#fanfiction#LESBIANS ARE REAL AND THRIVING#lil goobers#i love them so much#hii haji#not art by me but my friends artwork#splatoon story#it aint much but its honest work
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Artschool Dropout
I made a thread about how and why I became an artschool dropout, and want to share it here too. Storytime! It's mainly a highlight of parts I despite in the art worlds; capitalism and superiority. My experience was affected by the environment, and hell was a bad environment
Back in the distance year of 2019 I went to an(community) art college in like the *fancy* part of my area. I lived across the lake on the countryside, so I was not prepared for this environment. Rich people cosplaying poor is the best description. Fancy clothing made to look dirty and no-one wore shoes. It was very networking-vibe, with "omg we HAVE to talk more later" but never doing so. Like nurses energy. To be fair I became more and more non-approachable as time went on.
A good note is that Swedish education is normally free, even uni degrees, but this one cost money. It was that was never addressed or mentioned when I applied; that's on me maybe, but the few friends I had didn't know either. A lot was beaten around the bush when it came to expenses. A big draw for the school was a trip they made to Berlin during a film festival. Once the time came around they mentioned the cost for the trip (which was not mentioned before, I thought it was included) and kinda of shamed people if they wouldn't pay and go. Saying how its a highlight of the education and the few staying behind just watch movies for a week. In addition, the film festival wasn't included in the price, and we would have to pay extra to go. It was supposed to be a week, but two days was for travelling by train.
The price was something I would rather use for a private Berlin trip. It wasn't a lot, but I refused to do it, mainly for how indirect they were with everything. A friend and I said we wouldn't go and a staff complained how they would have to keep the school open just for us.
My classmates weren't an issue, it was the teachers and system, which all just felt like a money laundering scheme. One day we travelled to Stockholm, and we were tasked to go four hours alone, sit and stare at an object and think what it made is feel. Those were the instructions.
Four hours. Alone. Then home.
I and one other instead went to grab a coffee and trash talk. Once the time was up, I just made up on the spot "what it made me feel" and he gave me a job well done. I understand the assignment, but the execution from the teacher was all wrong.
It wasn't my crowd tho, I came from a gaming development High school while these people were like, social studies. I'm used to a nerdy crowd, is what I'm trying to say.
I have two funny examples:
I was talking to some guy during a break the ice get together with the whole school (very small school) and I explained I studied video game development before, and he said "omg that's so cool!!" And I answered, "yeah! Do you play?" And he said "yes, the piano :)"
And other time we were talking about painters, and when they asked me who my favourite was, I thought I would joke and said "oh, donatello :) because I love purple" and NO ONE got my tmnt ref and instead thought some Italian Renaissance was my favourite artist.
But back to the main issue, it was the school: First day our teacher handed us supplies from a closet and I was like "wow! Thank you! When these run out (BECAUSE WE'RE FKN ARTISTS) can we grab new ones in the closet?" And she said "no :) this is for the two years you are here" Like eight different hardness pens and a block of paper.
My worse experience was that every Tuesday was lecture day (although we didn't have grades nor exams) and all students gathered in a dark room to look at a PowerPoint about culture and people.
Fun in theory, but again executed so badly. My last lecture one teacher said "oh, and we gotten complaint not everyone can take notes during the presentation, so we thought one from each class could take notes and share with everyone else later :)! Any volunteer?"
Like ??? What? I raised my hand and said "you have a PowerPoint there? Why can't just share the presentation with everyone if they want to go back later?" AND SHE ANSWERED "that is a great idea, but unfortunately that would take weeks. So this is a better alternative:)"
TO THIS DAY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT SHE MEANT BY THAT
Smaller details ; expensive lunch, creepy teacher keeping images of women's privates on screen (and I'm an artist I don't mind nudity) pointless activities and little progression. I can't give it a fair judgement, I only lasted three weeks but jumped in the opportunity to leave.
Cherry on top was I had communicated in private with my mentor about quitting and the day it was decided I had to go back to get my stuff and have one last day and the teacher (not my mentor) exclaimed in the shadiest way "Sophie? I thought you quit" I hadn't told my friends yet.
Last day I replaced all my supplies with new from the fancy closet, and me and my friends stole coffee from the cafeteria during lunch (it was only included if you bought food) to celebrate my time. We all hated the system of the school, but all of us loved art.
My experience is mainly the environment the school was located in; upper-class pretending not to be. The people were alright and i got a few friends before quitting. It was also traditional, general art when I prefer digital art. The school, system, and teacher were hell, which is a shame because it took something I loved and turned it into all the things I hate. i don't regret going and I don't regret quitting when I did. Best thing to come out of it was my literal label Artschool Dropout
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OK so as someone who just genuinely loved Dual destinies and is keeping my theis length DD apologia in the drafts at least for now. I genuinely want to know why people don't like it.
I have seen this take from so many AA fans who I completely agree about everything else with. I need to understand why it sounds like we played completely different games.
I will put some I've seen but feel differently about under the cut
Critisms I find unfair:
-it doesn't tie up the loose ends AA4 left hanging. We don't hold any of the other games up to this standard because they all properly finish up the characters arcs. Aa5 cannot be blamed for the problems we want to overlook in AA4. I do also love AA4 but it does leave a lot of dangling plot threads that the others don't and that would be a fucking nightmare to tie up *staring directly at sibling reveal*
- Clay comes out if no where. He's very well established through the game. He just isn't mentioned in AA4 just like Fran isn't mentioned in AA1 and Dahlia isn't mentioned before AA3.
Critism I acknowledge is a reasonable opinion people can have but strongly disagree with
-Spilting the game between the protagonists stops them having proper arcs. Athena is our weird girl for this game. She is our maya. We get to play as her for 1.5 cases. For the majority of the game she's taking up the weird girl screen time and she's honestly still doing that in the ones you play as her. She's just a weird girl who happens to be a lawyer. In the main game Apollo and Phoenix have a roughly equal amount of screen time by chapter. They cut the bloated filler not the arcs (yes I will argue that 5-2 is needed for Apollos arc. Its there to set up his relationship with Athena that us a catalyst later on)
-Phoenix and Apollo are OOC. No. Phoenix is still a cryptic little bitch when you don't play as him and in AA4 he was so very clearly missing being a lawyer. It makes sense. Apollo very clearly in the last case of AA4 regains a lot of his respect for Phoenix. No, he doesn't do this on screen but again that is AA4s fault not dual destinies. That's how he acts the last time we see him so that's how he's acting now.
-The Phantom comes out of nowhere. Plot wise, maybe. But so do a lot of AA villians. Thematically, he's the perfect fit. DD is a game about trust. Very, very explicitly. A spy is someone who can't trust anyone. The phantom is a man who's shut himself off so much from emotions that he no longer recognises why trust is needed. And also has an ability that directly preys on people by making them think hes a trustworthy figure. He's not an incredible villian but he is thematically cohesive.
-almost a part 2 to the last point. The Fulbright reveal comes out of nowhere. First of all 5-2 has some very very choice sprite framing lol. But beyond that it also is a thematically smart choice. We as players are conditioned in AA games to trust the recurring detective. The villain should be someone that we trust. The guy was likeable but also fundamentally always kinda hollow and did in fact pull a shit ton of strings in 5-4 that we all ignored because we trusted him. The clues are there. You're just not ment to pick up on them because of the formula of these games.
-Edgeworth doesn't need to be there. Again game with a theme of trust. He doesn't necessarily need to be there but his dynamic with Phoenix does. They spent 3 fucking games setting up how important it is that those two trust each other and in a game about trust his absence would be felt.
-I don't see this a lot but I did see it a few times. Blackquill is a bad prosecutor. Honestly this is a taste thing and I love him. He is my little bastard man. Also thematically he embodies the two people you aren't supposed to trust in these games, a convict and a prosecutor but is actually a cool guy.
-I've never seen this but I can guess it's happened. Pearl comes out of nowhere. Again theme of trust. Phoenix has just lost the two people he's been relying on to trust the most and needed to be reminded that there were other people he loved and trusted so letter from Maya and visit from Pearl.
-mood matrix. I like the mini game I think it's fun. My brain likes to sit and logically think about what emotions it would make sense for someone to feel in situations.
Criticism I agree with but really don't bother me
-Trucy is side lined. Yeah. I love her to pieces and will never complain about getting more of her but it doesn't make sense for her to not be there plot wise and they clearly just didn't have room for her. I am happy with my Trucy scraps. I would visit her and present every piece of evidence to her to get as much dialogue as I could.
-Klavier is sidelined. Also yeah. But he did genuinely need to be there for 5-3 thematically for that case. (It is literally a showdown between his school of thought and the one he thought phoenix had) but they couldn't make him procecutor because he'd be too much on their side. It had to be someone who at that point seems at least a little morally dubious. I wish there was more but I will also happily take my Klavier scraps.
-the anime cutscenes. I don't love them but I do have a little switch in my brain marked "watching anime" that I can flip and enjoy them for what they are.
-the switch of the voiced sound effects. Yes they are worse but like, I can live with it.
Stuff I don't like and won't defend
-turnabout reclaimed racism and fatphobia (also blatant animal welfare ignorance). I'm not defending it or overlooking it but it's not the only game in this franchise to be problematic.
#ace attorney#dual destinies#aa5#aa5 spoilers#gyakuten saiban#dual destinies apologia#phoenix wright#miles edgeworth#apollo justice#clay terran#athena cykes#simon blackquill#bobby fulbright#pearl fey#trucy wright#whenever i write dd apologia i also make it look like i dislike AA4#i dont. i love that game. it is just flawed and i think people who already dislike DD but like AA4 want to pin those flaws on DD#however you see as i am an intellectual i love AA4 while accepting it's flaws instead of pawning it off onnthe next game/hj
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Jin & Xiaoyu in Tekken 8
This is a couple I’ve wanted for years and its safe to say Tekken 8 may just give them the room to be an actual couple once and for all. If you are obsessed with this fighting game franchise as much as I am and have been waiting as long as I have, Jin and Xiaoyu are a ship that in my opinion should have sailed loooooong ago. Xiaoyu is the sunshine and Jin is the one in need of that sunshine.
Their relationship seems to be more grounded and cohesive this time. No longer the delusional and obsessive teenager chasing the handsome and mysterious bad boy, but now as two young adults who respect one another whilst realizing and understanding underlying feelings and the role each plays in the other’s life.
Now before I get to it, I am fully aware that there are millions of people who are against them being a couple. “Oh Xiaoyu’s annoying, Jin doesn’t care for her, JinXiao shippers are delusional”, YADA YADA. Be that as it may, I am 100% behind Jin and Xiaoyu. This post is not for you!
Its shaping up to be Jin and Xiao as endgame and here’s why… Get comfortable because it’s a long one…
Starting off, Japanese men are not the most romantic and are considered shy in those kinds of contexts- as most Japanese people are. Japanese people are not big on pda and being straightforward. Commonly seen in manga and anime. Protagonist in most cases will literally do everything else in a story before worrying about their relationship- telling the girl or guy how they really felt. And it is usually the very last thing we get, if we get it at all. Creators/writers will hint at certain things subtly and you usually have to be aware of it. It’s a staple in Japanese storytelling and Tekken is no exception. It’s a fighting game people, so fighting is the main focus while something like romance is typically placed on the backburner.
With that said, Jin is yet another example of this. He crosses me as the type to be very loving but not in a showy kinda way. I’m certain Jun showered him with love and affection. Her very existence is love and affection. She is mama Kazama- Jin’s whole heart which was taken away from him very early. So being caring and affectionate is something we all know Jin is capable of doing. It’s just that his life took a course that changed him in a way that he needed to adapt to. The mishimas and the devil gene are no place for the kind boy who was raised on the almost remote island of Yakushima. Never having to deal with anything even close to his life after meeting Heihachi. I say this to not right any of his wrongs but to say that you can become a product of the things you go through in life.
Jin is capable of a lot but had to put a lot on the backburner because he was dealing with a situation that was thrown onto him. He didn’t ask for any of it but it was time for a boy to become a man. He no longer had Jun’s kind and touching words, but rather memories of her precepts and warmness to guide him, a grandfather whom he became to trust betrayed him in the worst way, and a father who could care less of his existence.
Xiaoyu on the other hand, a cheerful and caring young lady who wants nothing but to be there for Jin- someone she seen the good in and became a close friend to. She knows that Jin has only become the way he did to cope with the never ending pain and sadness, having to force away everyone and everything he cares about because he fears he would bring them nothing but harm. Jin was once a kind and sweet guy as Xiaoyu stated. Jin cares for Xiaoyu. He cares A LOT. I feel that he cares as much as he can in a way that he can given his situation. I don’t think I want the person I truly care for to be around me in moments were I lose control of myself either. Trust me, Jin has all the emotional components as the next person, he just doesn’t have the space to show it.
Xiaoyu isn’t an idiot. She understands this and catches what Jin throws. Jin’s life was a hard contrast to Xiaoyu’s fun loving, amusement park going life. Sometimes the best way to get through to someone is to communicate in a way they can understand and this time around she knows what has to be done.
And there are things that Jin is fully aware of. He knows that Xiaoyu will follow him to hell without a second thought. He knows she will come looking for him at the drop of a dime and wouldn’t even consider the harm she would face in pursuing him. HE IS FULLY AWARE of how much he means to her. Which is why he puts that distance between them. Why he disappears without a trace, why he keeps his hardships to himself. He knows Xiaoyu will go to bat for him quick. But he cares for her so much that he doesn’t want her getting caught up in his mess. Jin believes that he doesn’t deserve the love and consideration Xiaoyu gives him but he still cares. His self-hatred is what holds him back from believing he’s a proper member of society. The devil gene thoroughly labels him as an outcast who doesn’t deserve a second shot at life and he doesn’t try to hold onto that hope. So something like a relationship or friendship means nothing if you can never truly have it-and to him- as long as the devil gene exist, none of those things could ever be.
He feels as though he has to deal with everything on his own- end his family’s mess and end the bloodline. Jin always seems ready to give his life away because he feels the world would be better off without him. He looks at himself as an abomination, an existence not of this world. He invalidates how he really feels for what he thinks is appropriate for the situation. He calls it like it is. How can you smile, be a friend, or even have a relationship when you are a ticking timebomb and could ruin everything in the blink of an eye?
He's aware that Xiaoyu is going to give it to him straight, cut no corners. He knows she wants the best for him. He knows she’ll tell him that what he thinks of himself isn’t true. He knows that she can read him like a book. He knows she truly cares.
Their special interaction in Tekken 8 is long overdue. It shows exactly what their reunion should be. An abundance of emotions that look almost impossible to interpret. Xiaoyu- happy, relieved she found her man, but also with restraint trying to approach the situation another way, and there’s Jin- sheepish, unable to face Xiaoyu, not sure how she feels. Awkward but both push forward to paint a better picture together this time around. He knows she knows all the things he’s been doing and she knows that he knows but wants to move forward and be able to aid him in the fight. He’s always been much more softer in tone and demeanor with Xiaoyu. He calls the girl “Xiao”for goodness sakes, and in Japanese society people don’t usually do that unless they are really close and have a bond. She calls him “Jin”, no suffix just Jin. She even came out and said that "an exchange of blows can be revealing". Now if that's not obvious...
Sometimes love comes at the right time, and you have to be ready. The love was definitely there, feelings were definitely mutual, they were just shown very differently. In a lot of ways they just had to get themselves together and figure some things out. Besides the romantic part, Jin and Xiaoyu did a lot of growing up. I mean a lot. Look at those two. Xiaoyu LOOKS more mature. SHES A WOMAN NOW. Jin LOOKS certain in his actions and seems to have much more confidence and resolve. This is a man and a woman. I believe they are ready this time.
In a lot of ways Xiaoyu is what Jin needs- that reassurance, that support, that sunshine, that stick beside you type of thing.
And with Jun officially back, Jin’s life will definitely brighten up but with Xiaoyu included… That’s the ideal situation for me!!
I can go all day on these two but in conclusion, Jin and Xiaoyu are a pair that is definitely hard to come by and one of my favorites especially in games. It doesn’t make any since how long I have waited for an interaction between these two where they finally appear to be on even footing, on the same page, and know what they want.
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