#its like. i used to feel all the emotions i describe when i write but nowadays it feels so monotonous

[felassan]

David Gaider on Dorian, under a cut for length:

"Now this is a fun one. It's no big secret I have a lot of feelings about Dorian, not least of which because he was my first (and only) gay male companion. There's a lot more to him than that, of course (as there should be), and it was quite a trip. So let's go! Now, DAI is a story all its own, but I'm sticking to the characters. In this case, back at the beginning, the writers were going to try something new: we were going to let the artists take a more active role in the companion creation process. Why? Because not doing so had caused a lot of problems. See, here's the thing: writers and artists speak two different languages. When talking about characters, we talk about their story. Who they are. What they want. We'd write up these briefs, huge and full of information... but it was never the information the artists needed. They wanted visual cues. I don't mean describing their appearance. Sure, we'd usually provide that, especially if there was a story case to be made, but often the artists vetoed us on appearance stuff anyhow so meh. No, I mean they looked for visual language while we tended to only talk about who the characters *were*. What would happen is they'd hone in on something visual in our write-up not intended to be a focus. The first write-up for Anders in DA2, for instance, mentioned he was "haggard" after his journey... and the first concept we got was this pale, shriveled man. "What... is this?" "YOU SAID HAGGARD!" 😅"

"That was the other trick: sometimes when we DID try to be more descriptive, we had to be extra cautious because the words could be interpreted very differently. You encounter this recording VO, too. A VO note says "hysterical" and you *meant* "really upset" but the actor read "scream like a banshee" Thus this caused problems, like I said. The artists would struggle, sometimes conjuring details just to give the character *something* but which would change the character... and, to us, the character was created. Done. We were already invested, probably already writing them. Something had to give. So this time we wrote a bunch of character briefs - but short. One paragraph. We stuck to vibes and the *emotions* we wanted the concepts to evoke. And we didn't name them. They got titles like "Slick Con Man" or "Ice Queen", so we wouldn't get too attached. Then we handed these off to the artists. And it worked nicely. The ones that just weren't inspiring we'd discard, no problem. The others had juice... and the artists felt free to play and offer lots of variations because we weren't set on anything yet. A lot of times, what they produced ended up inspiring US. It was a neat back-and-forth."

"This is what led to Dorian, in fact. He came from a short write-up entitled "Rock Star Mage" and it really boiled down to "I'm cool and I know I'm cool, so take that you cretins". And just like that, the first sketches (by Casper Konefal, I think? I bet I'm wrong) were all amazing. Instant fire. Me: "He looks kind of like... Freddie Mercury?" Him: "Is that bad?" Me: "NO ARE YOU KIDDING THIS IS AMAZING" Plus there was a monkey. Sadly, we had to lose the monkey. There were iterations to come, but this was really where Dorian was born: Tevinter mage, noble, savant, and too cool for school."

"When did he become gay? Not right away. Like I said elsewhere, we didn't talk romance and sexuality until after the concepts were more in place. But as we were brainstorming about why this hot shot mage left Tevinter, the idea DID come up that maybe it was because he was gay. Not directly, however. Homophobia isn't really a thing in Thedas, after all, so at first blush I didn't think that could work. "Rich kid gets kicked out of the house for being gay" wasn't a trope I wanted to explore. But, then again, magister families in Tevinter are *obsessed* with the appearance of perfection, so...? Any deviation from the "norm" is considered scandal-worthy. It said weakness. It said you couldn't control your house. Now... THAT had real promise. The writing pit discussed it a lot. So I think it's fair to say that the gay fairy was already circling Dorian even before we got to the romance talk. I think it's also fair to say that the rest of the team realized I low-key wanted to write him, because when everyone started calling dibs, who was left standing for me? (I pick last, remember.) I gleefully snatched him up and got to work... ...about six months later. I was very busy at the time. 😅 That late start meant I had to design and write VERY quickly. And I did. Somehow, though, this one... it came easily. "Catty gay man" isn't digging very deep, no surprise to anyone who knows me, and it had an extra layer of being so fun because Dorian was confident. He sparred verbally. I loved it."

"There was more to it, however. The conflict between Dorian and his father... ugh, how do I say this? Let's be clear: Dorian's story is not MY story, but it's also not far off. I wrote the entire confrontation scene in one go. After I was done, I probably cried harder than I ever have in my life. 🫠 I was unsure whether it was any good, however. I just didn't feel objective. I passed it over to Cori May - my friend but also Dorian's editor - and asked her to please tell me and be honest. She read it. She walked into my office after, tears streaming down her face, and just nodded. "It's good." Here's the thing. Not everyone is going to agree with this, but: I don't think a writer NEEDS to be a minority in order to write a minority. Sometimes those characters should simply exist, and we want them to. But if that character's story is ABOUT their experience as a minority? That's different. Dorian's story didn't need to revolve around his sexuality - and, honestly, it only did so as a tangent to his family issue, but they're so bound together it's probably irrelevant to split them - but my writing him meant it could be. It allowed me to SAY something. That felt good. It felt right. Ramon Tikaram came on board after a lengthy casting process (so many British Indian accents, oh god). I sat in on a few recording sessions... the confrontation scene, though? Ramon: *says line* Me: (curled up on a nearby sofa in fetal position) *shaky thumbs up* Caroline: "Yep. Great work, Ramon!""

"Dorian's sexuality isn't all he's about, but that's certainly how some viewed it. When the character was announced in 2014, his being gay was mentioned as the last of a number of points, and the instant response from some gamers was to act as if we'd called a press conference just to say THAT. 🙄 It was annoying. Still is. Overall, however, the reaction to Dorian was very positive. The number of straight men who said they romanced him still pleases me. The number of fans who privately contacted me who'd been through conversion therapy, some who said Dorian helped them survive? Well. Gosh. 😭 I did write him for Trespasser - though I hear that a late scope cut meant every conversation had been chopped by 1/3rd or more, and that meant a lot of nuance lost. Which is sad, if true, because it sounds like the result of that left some Dorian romancers a bit cold. Such is how game dev rolls. 😔 If you need more proof of how it was hard for me to let go of him, a short story I wrote after Trespasser came out where Dorian has a bit of closure with his dead father: medium.com/@davidgaider... So yeah. He'll always be my boi. And I'll always be thankful Bio gave me this opportunity. ❤️"

[source thread]

User: "I'm not going to lie, it's hard to take my mind off Dorian almost having a monkey." David Gaider: "If by “almost” you mean there was a picture of a monkey that the concept artist put there as a whim, and which would almost certainly have taken more cinematics and modeling time to put in than we could ever afford… then yes. 😉" [source]

[chrollogy]

why does no one talk about the sadness you feel when you lose interest in your best hobbies

[seiwas]

i ran out of tags sera i can’t believe this ☠️

anyway i was just saying !!! that !!! ONLY YOUUUU can write smut like this and stilLl make it so emotionally pAcked and heavy and characteristically ON POINT and i don’t even know if u intend to 😭😭😭 it feels like these things just flow like magic out of ur fingertips !!!!!!!!

and the next morning when nanami is there too KAMXKSN THE KISS THE CHEF APRON IS KILLING MEEEE and when he trips reader by jokin about the hickIES and reader falls for it and satoru facepalms 😭😭 hELPP AND THE LAST LINE SERA THE LAST LINE !!!!!!!!!!!

anyway this is all to say That !!!!!! SERA i love u and i miss u !!!! And i am so happy that i get to find ur lil works like this no matter how long time has passed !!! And that i get read it !!!! And enjoy it the way i do !! Because i always will love the things u write 🥺🥺 U KNOW I WILL !!! AAAAAAH thank u for blessing us w this nanago (more heavy gojo) MEAL 🥹

also thank u to somi for reminding me that this exists omfg jsnxkdnxj

ੈ♡˳·˖✶ — GOJO X FEM READER

Gojo and you have little to nothing in common besides a friend group and a shared crush on Nanami Kento. However, as befitting the sorcerer to end all sorcerers, of course Gojo has one up on you - he’s actually made a move on Nanami. If he offers to give you a taste through him, who are you to turn down such a golden opportunity? 

wc — 4.5k

tags — mdni, nanami x reader is present but not the focus, praise, Gojo’s a tease, fingering, mutual pining but for Nanami, crying during sex but in a good way, light begging

Work has been long and exhausting. Everywhere in the world is overrun by curses, but surely the solution can’t be to simply give the sorcerers more curses. There’s only so many of you, and with assignments piling on, you all can barely breathe. Sooner or later, someone’s going to burn out - and that’s an infinitely worse possibility. You don’t want to know what happens when a sorcerer goes rogue. 

That’s why you’ve taken to recovering the best you can. At least the pay has been proportional, thanks to the efforts of one Nanami Kento. Enough so that you’ve been able to rent an apartment in the heart of Tokyo, where you can home after work and relax - as much as you can when most days you go out into the field, come home, sleep, and repeat. You’re not even sure when you’ve had the time to eat these days. 

Which is why coming home to the sounds of music leaking out of your apartment is a little unwelcome. As you hear a crash from inside, and a loud, “Shit!”, you begin to regret giving your friends your keys. It was supposed to be for emergencies only, and yet, as you unlock the door - 

“Welcome home,” Nanami says dryly, nursing a drink in his other hand. Utahime notices next and scrambles up to greet you with a kiss on either cheek. 

Keep reading

[whispers-whump]

Some writing advice

that I like to use when I write. None of this is meant to be taken as hard and fast rules, they’re just things I like to do/keep in mind when I’m writing and I thought maybe other people would enjoy! <3

Never say what you mean

This is an offshoot of the very common “show don’t tell” advice, which I think can be confusing in application and unhelpful for scenes where telling is actually the right move. Instead, I keep the advice to never say exactly what I mean in stories.

By using a combination of showing and telling to hint at what you really mean, you force your reader to think and figure it out on their own, which makes for a more satisfying reading experience.

You might show a character getting angry and defensive in response to genuine care and concern. You could tell the audience that the character doesn’t see/talk to their parents often. But never outright give the real meaning that the character feels unlovable because of their strained relationship with their parents and as a result they don’t know how to react to being cared for.

Your readers are smart, you don’t need to spoon feed them.

Be sparse with the important things

You know how in a lot of movies there’s that tense scene where a character is hiding from something/someone and you can only just see this person/thing chasing them through a crack in the door? You get a very small glimpse of whatever’s after the character, sometimes only shadows being visible.

Do that in your writing. Obscure the important things in scenes by overdescribing the unimportant and underdescribing the important.

You might describe the smell of a space, the type of wood the floor is made of, the sound of work boots moving slowly across the room, a flashlight in the character’s hand. And there’s a dead body, laying in a pool of blood in the far corner of the room, red soaking into the rug. Then move on, what kind of rug is it? What is the color, patterns, and type of fabric of the rug?

Don’t linger on the details of the body, give your reader’s imagination some room to work while they digest the mundane you give them.

Dialogue is there to tell your story too

There’s a lot of advice out there about how to make dialogue more realistic, which is absolutely great: read aloud to yourself, put breaks where you feel yourself take a breath, reword if you’re stuttering over your written dialogue. But sometimes, in trying to make dialogue sound more realistic, a little bit of its function is lost.

Dialogue is more than just what your characters say, dialogue should serve a purpose. It’s a part of storytelling, and it can even be a bridging part of your narration.

If you have a scene with a lot of internal conflict that is very narration-heavy, breaking it up with some spoken dialogue can be a way to give some variety to those paragraphs without moving onto a new idea yet; people talk to themselves out loud all of the time.

Dialogue is also about what your characters don’t say. This can mean the character literally doesn’t say anything, they give half-truths, give an expected answer rather than the truth (“I’m fine”), omit important information, or outright lie.

Play with syntax and sentence structure

You’ve heard this advice before probably. Short, choppy sentences and a little onomatopoeia work great for fast-paced action scenes, and longer sentences with more description help slow your pacing back down.

That’s solid advice, but what else can you play with? Syntax and sentence structure are more than just the length of a sentence.

Think about things like: repetition of words or ideas, sentence fragments, stream of consciousness writing, breaking syntax conventions, and the like. Done well, breaking some of those rules we were taught about language can be a more compelling way to deliver an emotion, theme, or idea that words just can’t convey.

Would love to hear any other tips and tricks other people like to use, so feel free to share!!!

[ancientgoddessofegypt]

Lilith The Enchantress: Lilithian Energy In The Houses. How Each One Brings Their Own Tempting Flair.

So you're probably wondering, where am I going with this?

I wanted to focus on the temptation of lilith, and why she is so oozing and attractive as is she.

For this reading, I will focus on the houses. In my later post, it'll be in each sign.

So lets dig in! Shall we ;)

Lilith in the first house - Pleasing to the eye. Can have a very sultry appearance. There is a point where they must undergo a transformation of the self, and at some point they will have a divine, sensual aura. There sensual power comes through the way they look at you, and often times they can tell when they're being a little too flirtatious. But that is so they can get the person of their choice. Like a siren, they go in for their target and come out on top. They use their attractive persona as like a spell, think of the girl on who framed roger rabbit with the beautiful red hair and dress.

Lilith in the second house - They have an eye for detail. This is the time to take you to their home and show you the rose petals on the bed with the red and white candles everywhere. They know how to make a person want them, by adding to some flair into their home. While also using different aesthetics for they're look to match with the energy that is being shared between them and they're lover. Very picky with who they spend their time with you know. They aren't for everyone. These are the type to make you wait for it.

Lilith in the third house - These are the lovers that can write erotic letters and make you think about them all night. The way their minds can carry a story, and then when you meet them in person its even better than the books. They hold their composure well, but deep inside they are ready to be explored in more ways than one. My my my, they sure know how to right a love spell. One that lasts til the very end.

Lilith in the fourth house - It's actually so much harder to get them to show you who they truly are, thats what makes their mystique so awe dropping. The way these lilithian beings share themselves is with the power of their emotions, and eventually they will bring you right into their beautiful dungeon they call a home. Where you will find all them in just one bite. Very sensual with the right one. The one that makes them feel good, the one that knows them from the inside out. These lilith babes will let you have all of them if once you have succumb to their power.

Lilith in the fifth house - The sensual energy these lilithians carry is a one of a kind. Their magnetism never goes unnoticed, and they take you on a roller coaster of emotions with their performance. They are intimate with their audience and can put you under a spell with the way they make things look. Their hearts are in it with this one. Very gentle to the eye, but to the soul its much more deep and profound. Can't take them anywhere because their wild manes get stuck in the pursuit of love, where they will drenched you with all their sweet and tears to make more use of the bloody romances they've indulged in. They will have you thinking about them for many moons, due to them putting their all into what they do in the matters of the heart.

Lilith in the sixth house - To be loved by a lilith babe with this placement, is to have made yourself fully devoted to them. Worship is what they want, and it is what they need to pursue them. They don't let just anyone in, so you must be prepared to give yourself as an offering. Very pleasant, and freaky to ones they want most. Most never see this coming, which is why they always get away with it ;) The sensual energy they carry is very smooth, abundant and hard to describe. Mysterious auras that you want more of, so much so you will spend every hour, every day of the week wanting to get to know them.

Lilith in the seventh house - The die hard lovers who goes in for the kill. What they want wants them, and they oozee it in with their attraction spells. Their auras are unique, fresh and able to commit to their partners. It's just that they have so many options to choose from so they have no use to sticking around if you're not pulling in your weight. Im sorry, its hard having to be loved by so many! The sensual power in them is hot, tempting, and alluring. You just can't get enough of them. Can see right thru you and can captivate you with just a look!

Lilith in the eighth house - The way they just make things easy with how they seduce people is something I feel nobody else can relate to. The way they come in and take the throne with how they please their partners as well as themselves, It may be that nobody could come close. But thats the thing about being in a scorpion house, is that you touch people in a way that people are not able to control within themselves.. yet you've already mastered it. Very pleasing, pulsating, bold and full of passion. The sensual nature in them could have you feel things you've never felt before, and that will have you in a panic. because the way they are able to get you to come out of that shell and move deeper into them . Will have you begging for more & more & more. Bewitching auras indeed!

Lilith in the ninth house - The delicacy mixed with erotic power. The angels and the demon. The artist and the muse. They have the power to seduce anyone with just their mind alone. They can seduce you with their wit, their humor, their charisma and just their soul in general. But on a sensuality note, they are abundantly clear on what it is they want. And they know just how to get it. They waste no time in going after the energy it is they feel desires them. They are devoted to themselves and the power of a Godly force and nobody comes close. So to the ones who get to experience them, they feel a closeness to the divine that makes you tremble a bit. Because they show us a sense of carefreeness thats been missing, so the way they seduce you is in how they free themselves in a world that is committed to self restraint.

Lilith in the tenth house - Enchanting and mysterious in nature. The world wants to have them but cannot get enough of them. The secret to these characters is that they know what it is you're looking for, but you just won't get it from em. Not immediately that is. They'll make you wait for it. Hell, they'll even charge you for it if your a beggar. They know you want it, but they aren't easy. Like a coquette, they'll have you waiting for years, and their energy will be intact and while yours feels depleted. Lilith tenth housers just know how to work it with their sex appeal. It can transform you, to say the least. ;)

Lilith in the eleventh house - A special energy is unlocked in these lilithians because not only do they have the capacity to seduce the whole world they can be someone close to them too. Be careful with them, because they might bite! ;) Their sensual power comes from the ability to be close with them and they have a compassionate nature too! This makes them way more likeable and seductive. And even if you're close to them, there is still something else about them. Almost hard to ignore, so its no wonder friends and associates try to get it on with em.

Lilith in the twelfth house - If all the other placements are tempting to the eye, then these beings are tempting to the soul. They have a capacity to entice others with the way they carry themselves. They have a gift in pulling you in, and telling a story with just their body language alone. The moment you are seduced by them, is the very moment you come over and have a meeting with God. They are no angel, but they can just about make you feel things that where never present before.

Lilith in these houses can show the tempting, seductive energies of a person if they learn how to tap in. There is a short story about lilith being the tempting 'devil' we kind of all known of her to be. However, learning more complexities of her story. She is so much more. So this just a small version of what we know as lilith, there will be many more to come!

[mononijikayu]

ikaw lang— fushiguro megumi.

"Thanks. he muttered, his voice softer this time, almost shy. He still wasn’t used to letting people in, but for some reason, with you, it didn’t feel so bad. You smiled again, that same warm smile that made something inside him flutter. "Anytime." you replied, and Megumi knew you meant it. “Let me take care of you again, okay? When this happens.” “......You didn’t need to—” You shake your head, smile even wider.  “But I want to, okay?”

GENRE: Alternate Universe - Canon Convergence;

WARNING/s: Fluff, Romance, First Love, First Meeting, Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Light-Hearted, Slice of Life, Friendship, Confessions, Humor, Mutual Affection, Love, Pining, Hugging, Mention of Injury, Mention of Fighting, Mention of Blood, Depiction of Medical Aid, Fushiguro Megumi is In Love, Sorcerer! Megumi, Non-Sorcerer!Reader, Megumi and Reader Are A Bit Older;

WORDS: 6.5k words.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: this song is really cute. i should rest after this because ive been writing all the other poll related works and my eyes hurts. i might open commissions some time so i can get new glasses 🤔 but anyway, i hope you like this as much as i do. i love you so much 🫶

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if you want to, tip! <3

:•:•:•:•:•:•:•:•☾☼☽•:•.•:•.•:•:•:•:

HE WONDERS WHAT HE DID TO BE THIS HAPPY. Fushiguro Megumi often finds himself lost in thought, trying to piece together how he ended up with someone like you as his lover. It’s a mystery to him, one that he turns over and over in his mind, especially in the quiet moments when he watches you from across the room.

The two of you couldn’t be more different. Megumi has always been reserved, the kind of person who prefers the solace of a quiet corner, away from the spotlight. He’s never been one to seek attention, content to blend into the background, observing rather than participating. 

And then there’s you, today. The person he loves the most.

You, who are the complete opposite of everything he thought he needed. You walk into a room and light it up effortlessly, drawing people to you like a lighthouse in a rough storm. Your presence is magnetic, radiant—wherever you go, you leave a trail of warmth and joy, like the sun casting light on everything in its path. If the sun existed in Megumi’s universe, it would undoubtedly be you, the brightest star in his sky, illuminating even the darkest parts of his world.

Sometimes, Fushiguro Megumi wonders how someone like you could ever be drawn to someone like him. He’s not flashy, not outgoing or overly expressive. But then, you’ve never needed him to be. From the moment you met, you saw something in him that no one else did. You didn’t mind his quiet nature; in fact, you seemed to appreciate it, to cherish the way he found comfort in the shadows while you thrived in the light.

Every time Megumi sees you, his heart races uncontrollably. It’s a feeling he can’t quite describe, this mixture of awe and disbelief that he’s lucky enough to have you by his side. You have a way of making him feel things he never thought possible—emotions that run deep and wild, far beyond the calm exterior he usually shows the world.

And whenever you flash him that smile, the one he loves so much, he feels his composure slip. His face turns scarlet, his heart stumbles over itself, and he panics slightly, wondering how he’ll ever survive the intensity of his feelings for you.

But what truly leaves Megumi breathless are your eyes.

He’s always been captivated by them, even before he realized he loved you. There’s something in the way your eyes shine that draws him in, that makes him feel like he’s seeing something otherworldly. When you look at him, it’s like the rest of the world fades away, leaving only the two of you in a moment of pure, unfiltered connection.

Your eyes are windows to your soul, reflecting every emotion, every thought, every ounce of love you hold for him. And Megumi, who is often so unsure of himself, finds a sense of peace and belonging in those eyes. They are his sanctuary, his guiding light, the proof that he’s not alone in this world.

Sometimes, when you catch him staring, you’ll tilt your head and ask him what he’s thinking. And every time, Megumi struggles to find the right words, because how can he possibly explain the way you make him feel? How can he put into words the overwhelming mixture of gratitude, love, and fear that courses through him whenever he’s with you? All he knows is that, in those moments, he’s reminded of just how extraordinary you are, and how incredibly lucky he is to have you.

You are the sun in his universe, the brightest star in his sky, and with every passing day, Megumi falls deeper in love with you. And even though he’s not always able to express it, he hopes that when you look into his eyes, you can see just how much you mean to him—how much he adores every part of you, and how grateful he is to share his life with someone as wonderful as you.

Each time you raise your head and let Megumi gaze into your eyes, he’s struck by how they seem to shimmer with an otherworldly light. It’s not just the way they sparkle, but the depth and complexity they hold within them, as if your eyes contain entire galaxies, full of stars, planets, and endless mysteries.

To Megumi, your eyes are like a universe unto themselves—vast, beautiful, and impossible to fully comprehend. He can never quite find the words to describe the wonder they bring him, because, in truth, they’re unlike anything he’s ever known. They’re out of this world, something magical and extraordinary that he’s lucky enough to witness every day.

And every day, Megumi is reminded of just how fortunate he is to have you by his side. There are moments when he’s caught off guard by the simple yet profound realization that someone as remarkable as you chose him.

He’ll be lost in thought, or caught up in the routine of daily life, and then you’ll look at him, your eyes meeting his, and all those thoughts scattered like leaves in the wind. In those moments, nothing else matters—just the connection between you, the unspoken bond that ties your hearts together.

Megumi finds that the most beautiful part of his day is when you look back at him. Your eyes, shining with a brilliance that words can’t quite capture, speak volumes in a language only the two of you understand. They tell him of the abundant love you hold for him, a love that fills his heart with warmth and light.

He’s always been shy, a little reserved, and sometimes he struggles to put his feelings into words. But when you look at him with those sparkling eyes, he wishes he could find the courage to tell you just how much it feels like heaven on Earth when you let him see the hearts hidden behind the bright beam of your gaze.

Megumi knows that you’re patient with him, that you understand his quiet nature, but sometimes he worries that he doesn’t show you enough how deeply he loves you. He wishes he could be more expressive, that he could find the words to tell you everything he feels.

But when words fail him, he hopes that you can see it in the way he looks at you—in the way his breath catches, in the way his heart races, in the way he’s completely and utterly captivated by you.

To Megumi, your eyes are not just beautiful—they are a reflection of the love you have for him, a love that he treasures more than anything in the world. Every glance you share, every moment your eyes meet his, is a reminder of how lucky he is to have found someone like you. And even though he may never fully grasp the magic you bring into his life, he knows that he will spend every day trying to show you just how much you mean to him.

To Megumi, it feels like stars might actually be falling from the sky, captured in the light of your gaze. Every moment he gets to see those eyes, he feels like he's witnessing something otherworldly, something that makes all the differences between you melt away, leaving only the overwhelming love he has for you.

Even though Megumi isn’t always good with words, he sometimes wishes that you could simply look into his eyes and just know that he loves you more than anything in the world. He hopes that you no longer feel the need to ask over and over, like you used to, because the truth is, you’re the only one he has ever truly loved—and the only one he ever will.

But sometimes, a nagging doubt creeps into his mind. He worries that his quietness might not be enough to convince you of how much you mean to him. He fears that he’s not doing enough to show you just how deeply he cares, because he struggles to express his feelings out loud. Yet, despite those fears, Megumi is determined to try harder, to find ways to show you his love so that you never have to doubt it.

If there were a way, Megumi wishes you could look into his heart and believe without a shadow of a doubt that you are the only one his heart has ever loved. And as he gazes at you now, he silently hopes that you can feel the depth of his affection in the way he looks at you, even if the words aren’t always there.

Fushiguro Megumi vividly remembers the first time he saw you for the first time. That was that day, during middle school. It was an ordinary day, and he wasn’t expecting anything to change. And for that change to be for the best.

He was known for being a bit of a loner, someone who kept to himself and occasionally got into trouble for his rebellious streak. He wasn’t exactly a model student, and most people gave him a wide berth, not wanting to get involved with someone who had a reputation for being a delinquent.

But then there was you, when you were younger.

He had just been reprimanded by one of the homeroom teachers for getting into another fight—something that had become more common as he struggled to navigate the challenges of his teenage years.

Or rather, just the annoyance he had for people he considered to be cruel, horrible people. But he supposed he was also angry, frustrated with the world, and on the verge of lashing out again when you approached him.

You were new, just transferred to the school, and Megumi was sure that you, like everyone else, would steer clear of him. But instead, you walked right up to him, your eyes full of concern rather than fear or judgment. You were like the sun blocking his eyes when he met you. You changed his whole world that day, he likes to think. 

"Hey! Are you okay?" you had said softly, your voice calm and soothing. "Oh no, you got some dirt on your shirt—is that a cut on your side?"

Fushiguro Megumi had been taken aback for a long time. The last time must have been when Gojo said he’s taking him and Megumi in. There were very few things that had Megumi fazed, stuck in his tracks, and at a loss for words.

Perhaps the act of kindness being shown to him was one of those points. But he doesn’t think you’ve blamed him. He wasn’t used to anyone talking to him like that—without the underlying wariness or caution. He didn’t know how to respond, so he just shrugged, trying to brush you off. 

“I’m fine.” he muttered, his tone gruff, hoping you would just drop it and leave him alone. "Don't worry about me. Move on."

But you didn’t leave. Instead, you stood your ground, your eyes filled with a concern that he hadn’t seen in a long time. It was as if you could see right through his tough exterior, straight to the part of him that was hurting, and you weren’t about to let it go unnoticed. You shook your head, your hands reaching out to gently tug at his sleeves, drawing his attention back to you.

When he finally looked at you, he was surprised to find that you seemed more distressed about his well-being than he was. There was a softness in your gaze, mixed with a quiet determination that caught him off guard.

"It doesn’t look like it! See? It hasn’t stopped bleeding. you replied gently, your voice free of any reproach, but filled with genuine worry. 

Megumi followed your gaze to the cut on his arm, a wound he hadn’t given much thought to in the heat of the moment. But seeing the concern etched on your face made him pause.

You hesitated for a moment, as if unsure of how to proceed, before speaking again. "But if you don’t want to talk about it, that’s okay. I just… I just wanted to make sure you’re alright." 

“Don’t worry about me—”

Your voice wavered slightly, betraying the depth of your concern, and it made something inside Megumi’s chest tighten. "At least maybe let me help you clean that nasty cut."

Megumi blinked, taken aback by your persistence. He was used to people either ignoring him or chastising him for getting into trouble, but you were different. You weren’t trying to fix him or tell him what to do—you were simply offering to help, to be there for him in a way that no one else had been. It was a kindness he wasn’t used to, and he didn’t quite know how to respond.

For a moment, he considered brushing you off, telling you he didn’t need any help, that he could handle it on his own. But something in your eyes stopped him. There was a sincerity there, a genuine desire to take care of him, and it made him realize how rare it was for someone to care like that.

"Fine." he finally grumbled, though his voice had lost its earlier edge. He couldn’t quite bring himself to meet your gaze, instead focusing on the ground as he added, "But it’s really not that bad."

You didn’t seem convinced, but you didn’t push him further. Instead, you smiled—a small, relieved smile that made his chest feel warm in a way he wasn’t used to. "Let’s just get it cleaned up, okay?" you said softly, leading him to a nearby bench.

As you carefully tended to his wound, Megumi found himself stealing glances at you, wondering why you cared so much. You were new to the school, new to his world, and yet here you were, going out of your way to make sure he was alright. It was strange, but also… comforting.

"Why do you care?" he asked quietly, surprising even himself with the question. It wasn’t something he’d meant to say out loud, but now that the words were out there, he couldn’t take them back.

You paused, looking up at him with those kind, worried eyes. "Because you deserve it." you replied simply, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "Everyone deserves to be cared for, you know?"

Your words hung in the air between you, and for a moment, Megumi didn’t know what to say. He’d never thought of himself as someone who deserved kindness, especially not from someone like you. But hearing you say it so matter-of-factly made him wonder if maybe, just maybe, you were right.

You took Megumi to the nurse’s office, your concern evident in every step you took. He had tried to brush off the cut on his arm as no big deal, but you weren’t having any of it. As you entered the office, you headed straight for the supply cabinet, rummaging through it to find the emergency kit.

Megumi watched you with a mixture of apprehension and admiration. His face was tense, a mixture of discomfort and embarrassment clearly visible. He had never been one to draw attention to himself, especially not for something he considered minor. Yet here you were, focused and determined to make sure he was taken care of.

You pulled out the first aid kit and set it on the counter, your hands moving quickly and efficiently. “Alright, let’s get this cleaned up,” you said, your voice steady and reassuring.

Megumi shifted uncomfortably, clearly aware of the fuss you were making. “You didn’t have to go through all this trouble. It’s just a scratch,” he muttered, trying to downplay the situation.

You gave him a stern look as you began to clean the cut. “It’s not just a scratch if it’s bleeding. Besides, it’s my job to make sure you’re okay. You’ve been taking care of everyone else, so let me take care of you for once.”

He sighed, though he couldn’t help but feel a little comforted by your persistence. As you carefully applied the antiseptic and bandaged his arm, Megumi stole glances at you, noticing the focused expression on your face. Despite his initial resistance, he was grateful for your concern.

“You really don’t have to do this,” he said again, though his voice lacked conviction this time.

You glanced up at him with a small, reassuring smile. “I know, but I want to. You’ve always been there for me, and it’s only fair that I return the favor. Besides, you look like you’re in no condition to argue right now.”

Megumi managed a small, appreciative smile despite his discomfort. “Thanks. I guess I’m just not used to this… kind of attention.”

You finished wrapping the bandage and patted his shoulder gently. “Well, get used to it. Because I’m not going to let you get away with not taking care of yourself. And don’t think I won’t be checking on you if you ever get hurt again.”

He looked at you, the tension in his face easing as he met your gaze. “I’ll try not to get hurt then. Or at least try to let you know before it gets this bad.”

You laughed softly, your eyes crinkling with warmth. “Good. And remember, if you ever need anything—whether it’s help with a cut or just someone to talk to—I’m always here for you.”

Megumi’s heart swelled with a mix of gratitude and affection. Even though he had tried to downplay the situation, your unwavering concern made him feel valued in a way he hadn’t felt before. He knew that no matter what happened, he could always count on you to be by his side.

As you finished bandaging his cut, Megumi felt a strange sense of calm settle over him. For the first time in a long while, he didn’t feel so alone. Maybe it was because of the way you looked at him, or the way you didn’t push him to talk about things he wasn’t ready to share. Or maybe it was just because you were there, offering your help without expecting anything in return.

"Thanks....I guess." he muttered, his voice softer this time, almost shy. He still wasn’t used to letting people in, but for some reason, with you, it didn’t feel so bad.

You smiled again, that same warm smile that made something inside him flutter. "Anytime." you replied, and Megumi knew you meant it. “Let me take care of you again, okay? When this happens.”

“......You didn’t need to—”

You shake your head, smile even wider.  “But I want to, okay?”

He didn’t know how to reply. He rubs the back of his neck. “You’re a weird one.”

“EH!? But I’m not!”

As the two of you sat there, the world seemed to quiet down around him, leaving only the gentle presence of the person who had somehow managed to slip past his defenses and show him a kindness he hadn’t realized he was missing.

Megumi didn’t know what to say. He was used to people either avoiding him or giving him grief for his behavior, but you were different. You weren’t trying to lecture him or push him away. You were just… there, offering your kindness without expecting anything in return.

From that day on, you always treated him with the same patience and understanding, even when he continued to get into trouble. You never judged him, never scolded him. Instead, you listened, offering support when he needed it and giving him space when he didn’t. You seemed to see past the rough exterior, recognizing that there was more to him than just the delinquent reputation he had built.

At first, Megumi didn’t understand why you were so kind to him. He didn’t think he deserved it, and part of him expected you to give up on him eventually. But you never did. No matter how many times he got into trouble, you were always there, offering him a smile or a word of encouragement.

Slowly, he began to soften around you. He started to look forward to the moments when you would seek him out, your presence becoming a source of comfort in his otherwise turbulent life. You became his anchor, the person who made him believe that maybe he wasn’t as bad as he thought.

It wasn’t long before Megumi realized that his feelings for you had grown into something deeper. At first, he had tried to convince himself that what he felt was simply gratitude, an appreciation for the way you treated him with such genuine care and respect. But as time passed, he found himself thinking about you more and more, his thoughts lingering on the little moments you shared.

Like that time in the library, when you had insisted on helping him with his homework. Megumi had been struggling with a particularly difficult problem, his frustration mounting with each failed attempt to solve it. You had noticed his struggle and quietly slid your chair closer to his, gently guiding him through the problem with a patience that both surprised and comforted him.

“There, see? You’re getting it!” you had said, a bright smile lighting up your face as you watched him work through the problem.

Megumi had looked at you then, really looked at you, and something inside him had shifted. It was the way you had been so kind, so encouraging, without a hint of judgment or condescension. The way you had treated him like he mattered, like you genuinely wanted to see him succeed. It was a feeling that was foreign to him, yet it warmed him from the inside out.

Another moment had come when the two of you were walking home from school. It had started to rain unexpectedly, and Megumi had cursed himself for not bringing an umbrella. But before he could worry too much, you had pulled out your own and held it over both of you, smiling up at him as if it were the most natural thing in the world.

“Come on, let’s share. Can’t have you getting soaked.” you had said, your voice cheerful despite the downpour.

As the two of you walked side by side, your shoulders brushing occasionally, Megumi had felt his heart do a strange little flip. He hadn’t been able to stop himself from glancing at you out of the corner of his eye, noticing the way the raindrops clung to your hair, how your smile remained unwavering despite the weather.

In that moment, something had clicked for him. It wasn’t just your kindness that drew him to you—it was the way you made him feel safe, understood, and… cared for.

The realization had hit him one afternoon when you both were at the park. You had been talking animatedly about something, your hands gesturing as you spoke, your eyes sparkling with excitement.

Fushiguro Megumi had been content to just listen, watching the way your expressions changed with every word. And then, without warning, you had turned to him, catching him completely off guard with a look of such warmth and affection that it nearly knocked the breath out of him.

“What?” you had asked, laughing lightly when you noticed the way he was staring.

Megumi had opened his mouth to respond, but no words had come out. Instead, he had felt a strange mix of emotions bubbling up inside him—nervousness, excitement, something that felt suspiciously like hope. It was then that he realized: this wasn’t just friendship or simple admiration. It was something deeper, something more.

He liked you. A lot.

The thought had sent a rush of warmth through his chest, leaving him both exhilarated and terrified. Megumi wasn’t used to these kinds of feelings, and he wasn’t sure what to do with them. But as he looked at you, standing there with that bright smile on your face, he knew one thing for certain—he wanted to be around you, to make you smile like that as often as he could.

“Nothing.” he had finally managed to say, a small, shy smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “I was just… thinking.”

“Thinking about what?” you had asked, tilting your head curiously.

Megumi had hesitated for a moment, but then he had decided to be honest, even if he couldn’t say everything that was on his mind. “About how… I like spending time with you.”

Your smile had grown even brighter at his words, and you had reached out to lightly punch his arm in that playful way you always did. “Well, I like spending time with you too, Megumi.”

And just like that, Megumi had known that he was done for. He liked you—really liked you. And even though the thought scared him, it also filled him with a strange sense of happiness, one that he wasn’t sure he’d ever felt before. From that moment on, Megumi couldn’t deny it anymore. He liked you, and he wanted to see where these feelings would take him.

Looking back, Megumi often finds himself reflecting on how profoundly different his life might have been if you hadn’t approached him that day. It was a pivotal moment, one that he now sees as the turning point in his journey.

Before you, he had felt like a perpetual outsider—misunderstood, labeled as a troublemaker, and largely ignored by those around him. He had been resigned to his role, to the way people saw him, without much hope for change or growth.

But then you came into his life, a beacon of kindness and patience in a world that had been mostly indifferent. You saw something in him that no one else had—a potential for change, a person worth caring for. Your approach had been gentle but resolute, offering him a friendship and understanding that he hadn’t known he needed.

You didn’t judge him for his mistakes or his quiet demeanor; instead, you reached out to him with a genuine concern for his well-being. It was this unassuming kindness that started to crack open the hardened shell he had built around himself.

Now, years later, Megumi often wonders if he would have ever found the strength to change if it hadn’t been for you. He thinks about the way you had treated him back then, how your unwavering support had slowly begun to reshape his view of himself.

It was as if you had quietly whispered to him that he was worth something, that he had the potential to be better, and that there was more to him than just the surface-level troubles. And in doing so, you had planted a seed of hope and self-worth that gradually grew into something stronger and more resilient.

As the two of you sit together now, the evening sun casting a warm, golden glow through the window, Megumi can’t help but be reminded of how far he’s come. The comfort and familiarity of your presence have become a cherished part of his life.

He often steals glances at you, unable to fully comprehend just how lucky he is to have someone like you by his side. The way you’re sitting there, so effortlessly at ease, makes his heart swell with a deep affection that words can hardly capture.

You’ve caught him staring more than once, and each time, you respond with that soft, knowing smile that makes his heart skip a beat. It’s a smile that reassures him, that reminds him of the love that started on that day in junior high, when you saw him not as a problem or a troublemaker, but as someone worthy of care and respect. That smile, simple yet profound, continues to be a source of comfort and joy for him, a daily reminder of how much you mean to him.

In those moments, as he looks at you and sees the warmth in your eyes and the gentle curve of your lips, Megumi is filled with a deep sense of gratitude. He thinks about how his life might have been different without your influence, and he realizes just how much you’ve changed him. The love he feels for you is rooted in that initial connection, and it has only grown deeper and stronger with time.

Megumi knows now that the love he has for you began with that first act of kindness you showed him, and it has only been enriched by the years you’ve spent together. As he sits there beside you, basking in the glow of the setting sun and the warmth of your presence, he can’t help but feel that he has found something truly extraordinary—something that started with a simple gesture of care and has blossomed into a love that he never thought possible.

You lean in slightly, noticing how quiet he’s been. "Megumi. Oiiiiiii, Megu–Megu~ Gumiiiiii!”

He sighed, looking at you. You have energy again, after resting. “What is it?”

“You truly okay?" you ask, your voice gentle and inviting.

He hesitates, his cheeks turning a light shade of pink. "It’s nothing. Don’t worry about me.” he mumbles, looking down at his hands, fidgeting slightly. "Just thinking about the past. Nostalgia."

You tilt your head, your eyes sparkling with curiosity and affection. You smiled. "You’re always so cute, Megumi.” You sighed, as you reached out gently to touch his hand. ”You’ve been staring at me all evening. If you have something to say, you can tell me, okay?”

Megumi swallows, gathering his courage. "It’s just… your eyes…" he finally says, his voice barely above a whisper. "They’re… really beautiful. And just…..you. I think how lucky I am to be with you.”

You blink in surprise, not expecting such a heartfelt compliment from him. "Oh, my beloved Megumi." you murmur, feeling a warmth spread through your chest. "Thank you."

Megumi slowly looks up at you then, his own eyes filled with a tender sincerity that makes your heart flutter. He took a breath before letting his eyes wander at the sight of you, his beloved marvel. His wonder in life. He gives you a faint smile. 

"When you look at me like that… it feels like I’m seeing stars." he continues, his voice growing softer, more vulnerable. "Like… every time I see your eyes, it’s the most beautiful part of my day. And… I don’t know how to say this right, but… it’s like there’s love shining behind them, so much that it feels like heaven."

Your heart swells with emotion, and you squeeze his hand gently. You lifted his hand to your lips and looked at him tenderly as you pressed your lips against the top of his hand. He doesn’t know when his heart will calm down. But when it’s you, he doubts if it will ever happen. 

"Megumi, that’s one of the sweetest things you’ve ever said to me." you reply, your voice filled with warmth. "And just so you know, when I look at you, I feel the same way. You make every day feel like the brightest one I’ve ever had. Because when I look at you, I ask, ‘how did I deserve this boy?’ Because, you’re too good to me.”

He smiles shyly, his blush deepening as he takes in your words. "I’m glad….that you feel like I do too." he murmurs, his fingers intertwined with yours.

"I always will." You reassured him, grinning at him lovingly.

"I… I’m not good with words, but I want you to know how much you mean to me. Every time you look at me, it’s like… it’s like I’m the luckiest person in the world."

You lean in closer, pressing a soft kiss to his cheek. "You don’t have to say much, Megumi. I can see it in your eyes too." you whisper, your breath warm against his skin. “That’s more than enough for me, know that. Okay?”

Megumi’s heart swells, and for a moment, he forgets about his usual shyness. "I love you." he says softly, the words slipping out before he can stop them. “More than you’ll ever know.”

Your smile widens, your eyes shining even brighter. "I love you too, Megumi." you reply, your voice filled with the same sincerity and warmth that he sees in your gaze every day.

And in that moment, with your hands intertwined and your eyes locked, Fushiguro Megumi knows that there’s nothing more beautiful than the love you both share. And he truly believes that. He thinks that you’re the love of his life. And he has no intention of letting you go.

Megumi's heart races as the words hang in the air between you. He's never been the best at expressing his feelings, but something about being with you makes it easier—like the words come naturally when you're around. You pull back slightly, just enough to look into his eyes again, your own filled with the same warmth and love that makes his heart flutter. 

"You know, Megumi." you start, your voice soft and affectionate, "I always feel like I’m the luckiest person too. Because even when you're quiet or shy, I can feel everything you don’t say in the way you look at me. It’s like you’re telling me a million things with just a glance."

He bites his lip, trying to find the right words to respond. "It’s hard for me to… say things out loud sometimes. And it’s hard to be honest at times." he admits, his gaze lowering for a moment before meeting yours again. "But when I’m with you, it feels different. Because when I’m with you, I’m just….me.”

You smile at him, a soft, understanding smile that makes him feel even more at ease. "You don’t have to say everything, Megumi." you reassure him. "I can see it in your actions, in the way you care for me, and in those beautiful eyes of yours. You’re always telling me how you feel, even when you think you’re not. I love that about you, don’t worry.”

Megumi blushes, the compliment making him feel a mix of embarrassment and joy. "You… you think my eyes are beautiful?" he asks, his voice small, almost disbelieving.

"Of course I do." you reply, leaning in to rest your forehead against his. "They’re one of my favorite things about you. They’re so expressive, even when you’re being quiet. I can always tell what you’re feeling just by looking into them. Your eyelashes too. They’re always pretty!”

His breath hitches at the closeness, your words making his heart swell with emotion. "I… I’m glad you think that." he murmurs, his eyes locked onto yours. "Because… When I look at you, I see everything I could ever want.”

Your heart skips a beat at his confession, and you close the small distance between you, pressing a tender kiss to his lips. It’s soft, sweet, and full of the love that you both share, a love that needs no words to be understood.

When you pull back, you see that Megumi’s face is a deep shade of red, but there’s a small, content smile on his lips that makes your heart soar. "You really know how to say the perfect thing, don’t you?" you tease lightly, brushing a stray strand of hair away from his face.

He chuckles softly, his shyness momentarily forgotten as he looks at you with nothing but affection. "Only because it’s you." he replies, his voice steady and full of sincerity. "You make it easy."

You both sit there for a moment, just enjoying the comfort of each other’s presence. Megumi’s hand is still entwined with yours, and he gives it a gentle squeeze, as if to remind himself that this is real—that you’re real, and that you’re his.

"I never thought I’d be this happy, you know?" he admits quietly, almost as if he’s afraid that saying it out loud might break the spell. "But with you… it’s like every day is a dream."

You smile, your heart swelling with love for the boy who, despite his quiet demeanor, has given you more happiness than you ever imagined. "Then let’s keep dreaming together, Megumi." you whisper, leaning in for another kiss. "Because I never want this to end."

The warmth of the setting sun bathed the room in a golden hue, casting a gentle glow that seemed to amplify the intimacy of the moment. Megumi and you were nestled comfortably together, sharing a quiet sense of peace that had settled between you. This was paradise, Megumi thinks. This was heaven on earth. You and you alone, in his arms — he could not ask for anything more.

Megumi glanced at you again, his eyes reflecting the soft light. “What good did I do to be with you?”

You tilted your head, smiling at him with a mixture of curiosity and affection. “Why do you say that? What makes you feel that way? You did everything good. You do deserve me."

He hesitated, his gaze falling to the floor as he tried to find the right words. “It’s just… you’ve always been there for me, even when I didn’t really know what I needed. I was so closed off and messed up back then. But you saw something in me, something I didn’t even see in myself.”

You reached out, gently placing your hand on his cheek to lift his gaze to meet yours. “I saw a person who needed kindness and understanding, and I’m really glad I could be there for you. But you did the hard part, Megumi. You changed and grew, and that’s all you.”

He shook his head slightly, his eyes never leaving yours. “I couldn’t have done it without you. And now, every day with you feels like a gift. I keep thinking about how different things could have been if you hadn’t come into my life. It’s overwhelming sometimes.”

You chuckled softly, your fingers brushing his hair back from his forehead. “Well, I’m glad I did. And I’m glad you’re here with me now. It’s like we were meant to find each other, don’t you think?”

Megumi nodded slowly, his expression thoughtful. “Yeah, it does feel like that. I keep thinking about how we met and how everything just seemed to fall into place after that. It’s like you were the missing piece I didn’t know I needed.”

Your eyes sparkled with affection as you leaned closer. “And you were the person who showed me what it means to be patient and understanding. We’ve both learned so much from each other.”

He smiled, a rare, genuine smile that made his eyes crinkle at the corners. “You’ve made me a better person. I feel like I’ve become more open, more willing to trust and care. It’s all because of you.”

Your heart swelled at his words, and you wrapped your arms around him in a gentle hug. “I’m just glad I could be a part of your journey. And I’m excited for everything that’s still to come for us.”

Megumi returned the hug, holding you close as if he never wanted to let go. “Me too. I want to make sure I’m always there for you, supporting you just like you’ve supported me. I don’t want you to ever doubt how much you mean to me.”

You pulled back slightly to look into his eyes, a soft smile playing on your lips. “You don’t have to worry about that. I know exactly how much I mean to you. And I’ll always be here for you, just like you’ve always been there for me.”

As the two of you sat together, the warmth of the setting sun casting a gentle glow over the room, Megumi felt an overwhelming sense of contentment. He knew that with you by his side, every day would be brighter, every challenge more bearable.

And as he looked into your eyes, he realized that the love he felt was a constant, reassuring presence—one that made everything feel right in the world.

[the-s1lly-corner]

Can you write some scar fluff/comfort? As in kissing slashers scars (And trying to not get stabbed /hj) or vise versa? Maybe with Jason, Micheal, Brahms, and Thomas? (Feel free to change them up)

Kissing their scars (Jason, Brahms, Thomas and Michael)

and the days writing begins! hoping to get a lot done, even if a lot of it wont be posted today to avoid spam- wooo!! notes: reader is gn, you kiss their scars, michaels part is admittedly short mostly due to the admin still not totally used to writing for him yet- havent quite felt ive got his personality down cws: healed injuries, nothing intense but i like to be safe than sorry

JASON

he has more than his fair share of scars, and honestly? hes not all that worried about them, hes not ashamed of them- he takes them as a sign that hes been doing well with protecting his space as well as you

still open to you kissing them, theres lots to choose from.... hes got them on his hands, his back, shoulders, youre sure if you look there would be a scar somewhere

the moment is so tender that he may shutter a little with some emotion, being slightly more emotive than he normally is

take his hand and press his scarred knuckles to your mouth for a gentle kiss and hes going to be melting in your grasp

its not much different than the kisses you press onto his mask but the intention feels different- if that makes sense.. hes bad at describing things...

BRAHMS

does not like his scars at all- he thinks they look unsightly and they feel uncomfortable against his skin thats not scarred over

covers most of them with his mask and clothing, but you can see some splotches here and there

he... doesnt quite know how to feel about it when you kiss them, but hes not going to deny himself the extra attention and affection that youve giving him

with time he may grow to accept them; whether or not he stops covering them up is a totally different thing, though...

one thing is still the same, the second you give him some extra loving hes going to expect that to be the new normal- surely you wont mind cuddling into him while trailing kisses up and down his body where his scars reside!

MICHAEL

similar to jason, he doesnt mind his scars all that much... in fact he doesnt care about them at all, and you probably wouldnt have known he had them if you didnt see him without his usual coveralls on

shows no visible reaction to you lightly pressing kisses to the scars he lets you get close enough- usually reserved to the ones on his hands hes gotten from minor burns or nicks

does not seek affection, but its a good sign that hes not pulling away or otherwise getting you to stop... because if he truly wasnt interested in it he wouldnt indulge you

doesnt quite understand the sentiment behind kissing his (now healed) wounds but you do you

THOMAS

you make him feel better about his looks, youre always uplifting him so you kissing along his face- especially concentrating it around where his nose once was- makes him feel.. nice

it does come as a little surprise at first, though, not that he thinks youre revolted or not fully willing to show your devotion and love for him... its more so the act never crossed his mind until you did it

youre cupping his head in your hands, fingers lightly tangled in his hair... perhaps even massaging his scalp as you lean in for another kiss

truly he is in heaven as you give him all of your love, youve never seen someone look at you with so much love in their eyes... much less look at you like that

it does make him more willing to take his masks off around you, now fully reassured that you dont mind his appearance at all and that you like the face he was given

[jennifer-jeong]

Fluff | Genshin x GN!Reader What Made Them Fall For You?

Xiao, Wanderer/Scaramouche, Diluc

SUMMARY Headcanons on what makes the genshin pookies fall for you <3

CONTENT Fluff, gender neutral reader, men falling for reader, reader is not traveler but is friends with them, mentions of character's trauma, CHARACTERS ARE 18+

AUTHOUR NOTES I hope to eventually write about all the men >:) it will probably take a while to get to it but I’ll try to keep each one short to encourage myself to finish them all hehe.

XIAO

I think Xiao would start to fall for you because you see through his tough, mean guy act. You can tell that even though his words are harsh and he’s telling you to leave him alone, he’s just protecting you. You might not see it at first, but as you understand his condition, his karmic debt, you understand him. Your realization makes you feel warm knowing that Xiao is really just an innocent soul who wanted to keep you safe. He wants so badly to never hurt anyone ever again and “repent” in solitude even though he has nothing to really repent for; he was forced to kill by his previous master and his karmic debt only comes from killing the remnants of old gods and absorbing their debt.

You start to hang around him more as a result and, much to Xiao’s dismay, he doesn’t hate it. In fact, he actually enjoys how you reignite the warmth in him, the warmth he hasn’t felt in so long since his fellow Yaksha have passed. But did he want to let you in? Shouldn’t he push you away? He’s been alone for so long, why change that now? He felt like he didn’t deserve to enjoy company again, that he didn’t deserve you and your kindness. But maybe just this time… just once, would he allow it.

WANDERER

I think Wanderer would start to fall for you because you make him feel human emotions like he’s never felt before. He’s always searched for a “heart” in the form of a gnosis, thinking it would make him human and make him feel loved and wanted. But even when he had it, it didn’t feel right. Even now, with his anemo vision, he feels more, but still not what he wants. But with you, it feels perfect. Others would probably describe what he feels as something like “butterflies in my stomach” but since he probably doesn’t really experience physical things like that, being a magical puppet and all, he thinks about how you make his vision glow. When he feels a surge of emotions, it feels like he’s using his vision. It feels powerful, happy, strong, and warm, like how a light breeze feels on a sunny afternoon.

You know about his past, what he did, and how the world wronged him. He’s been so traumatized and can barely comprehend his emotions. So when you reach out to him after he regains his memory and a new anemo vision, you try to help him through his emotions in the gentle way that you do. You’re so soft with him and it makes his vision heart ache. He believes he doesn’t deserve you but you try your best to show him otherwise. As you two get closer, you never really notice, but the wind always picks up just a little bit when he sees you.

DILUC

I think Diluc would start to fall for you because you don’t just see him as “the young and rich son of the Ragnvindr family estate.” You see him for him: Diluc. You see a beautiful soul with a broken heart that has put up walls that he intends to never break down again. Others might think that Diluc is just cold, but you and the others close to him know that no matter how cold he may seem, the pure fire that burns inside him always spreads its warmth to those around him. He’s believed for a while now that barely anyone can see what he’s hiding underneath, that people want him for his money, his property, his material things. But you prove him wrong time and time again. You sweetly say hi to him every time you see him not because you want to put on a facade to get on his good side. You don’t help him break up a fight at the tavern and clean up after because you want a monetary reward. You don’t bake him an adorable strawberry cake for his birthday because you want something back. No, you do it because you care, because you have so much love to give, and Diluc feels so lucky to be a part of your life.

He feels his feelings grow for you as time goes on. He feels you getting closer and he barely hesitates to let you in. You didn’t break down his walls, you politely made a door for yourself to enter and it makes you both laugh to think about it that way. He stays reserved around most others but always holds the door open for you, physically and metaphorically.

|| MASTERLIST ♡ || Thank you for reading! ||

[valtsv]

Do you have any tips to get better at writing? Your word usage is so amazing. the way u describe things are so utterly unique, it’s so mesmerizing. You motivated me to write more but I want to reach your level of skill

i'll be honest, i personally find my writing to be rather subpar and lacking in the necessary technical skill to justify its overly stylised prose and excessive wordiness, so i wouldn't necessarily recommend taking inspiration from me. that being said, i'm my own worst critic and i am very flattered that my writing resonates so strongly with you. i'm not a professional writer, so i can't offer much in the way of advice beyond what has, through trial and error and years of practice, worked for me.

something that people often point out to me when complimenting my writing is that i have a rather lyrical style, which i can see. i try to pay attention to the way that words flow together - which words best complement one another - and choose how to structure and order sentences based on that. i do have a fairly extensive vocabulary thanks to reading a lot from a young age, but i also frequently make use of the thesaurus (my most dearly beloved). obviously, trying to beef up your writing by simply using more obscure words that you found in a book will come across as clumsy, and detract from your writing rather than enhancing it, but if you learn how to stitch words together in a way that has a pleasing ear or mouthfeel, you can mitigate that somewhat, and even make it part of your repertoire of skills.

speaking of vocabulary, the more expansive it becomes, the more doors it opens to you in terms of what you can write and how you can write it. this is pretty straightforward common sense stuff, but you'd be surprised by how effective is if you actually start paying attention to it. likewise with grammar. not everything you write needs to sound like it was written for a sophisticated publication in a well-respected 19th century newsletter, but if you read widely and often, you'll find that your understanding of just how many ways the scaffolding of phrasing and punctuation can be used to support incredible linguistic architecture there are grows immensely, and start seeing opportunities to make all these little adjustments and additions and substitutions that enhance your work's overall presentation.

with regard to the above, i'd also recommend considering how you want your audience to feel. you can alter a reader's entire undercurrent of sensational experience simply by changing a few words, according to whatever emotional (or even more primal) response you intend to provoke. you can also mix your palettes, and flirt with crossing the wires (horror tinged with eroticism and vice versa, fantasy with a dose of down-to-earth pragmatism, tragicomedy, and so on). the more you experiment, the more your confidence will grow, and your skills begin to take shape, from crude instruments to refined, specialised tools.

one word of caution i'd offer you, based on my own shortcomings, is that my style of writing does very much neglect realistic-sounding dialogue. the way that i write and the way human beings talk to one another clashes without much grace or redemptive quality (at least in my opinion), and i have yet to find a satisfactory solution to this. i'll let you know if i ever figure it out.

[grriki]

This made permanent changes to my brain

not you / nishimura riki

synopsis: out of all the people that could've hurt me, i didn't expect one of them to be you.

warnings: angst and angst and more angst, heartbreaks, toxic behavior, mixed signals, cheating, lmk if i missed anything else.

pairing: riki x reader, takes place in college

wc: 14.7k

With your phone alarm going off, you come out of the bathroom, ready and prepared for the day ahead of you. Numbers on the clock tell you that you have enough time to eat breakfast, brush your teeth then head to your first class of the day. When we say breakfast, we mean coffee and maybe toast bread (if you're lucky) because that's the kind of luxury living in a dorm gets you. Roommates aren't always the best thing ever but lucky you, you did not get the shorter end of the stick. Because of Bahiyyih, she was a year above you but that did not matter since you two seem like long lost sisters. She's definitely one of the reasons why you are currently mentally sane.

Unfortunately, she'll also be the reason why you meet the one that will make your college life a living hell and test that sanity of yours. Being close to her means you come along to her brothers' dancing competitions, being at those competitions also means you meeting Nishimura Riki...

Here's the thing, there was nothing wrong with Riki, when you first met the rest of Huening Kai's dance group members; Riki was the most kind and most welcoming. He was someone who you clicked with so easily, someone who presented himself as if he was so trustworthy... emphasis on 'was'. Because right now, the man standing in front of you is reminding you what 'hindsight' is.

It started during your freshman year, after gaining a solid friendship with Bahiyyih; she wanted to bring you to one of her brother's performances for the school's event. You never minded going to them because you enjoyed musical art in your own time as well. When you went to see these events, you only ever looked at the group as a whole, judging their skills and expertise. That was until you went backstage to see Huening Kai. His group just won first place and you went over with Bahiyyih to congratulate them.

That's when your life was going to start shifting because when you knocked on the door, Riki opened the door with a warm smile, and gestured you guys to enter. "Hiyyih, nice to see you again" he says in a sarcastic tone, showing the close-ness he has with Bahiyyih as well.

"Oh Riki, I love seeing you around" Hiyyih responds back with the same kind of sarcasm. "This is yn, be nice". You looked up at him, and geez did that feel like an effort to do since he was 6ft tall, maybe even more than that. He smiles shyly as he notices how cute your height difference was. "Wow, look at Riki boy being all shy, that's new". one of the other guys say, which you later find out it was a senior named Heeseung.

"Leave him alone guys before he becomes beet red" Huening Kai walks in and greets you after. You look back at Riki who was still opening the door, standing in the same spot. "You okay there, bud?" Kai nudges him; getting him out of his trance. "What? Love at first sight?"

There you have it, your little meet-cute with Riki, it is also the day that marks the teasing shipping by everyone that knew you two. But that did not stop Riki from sticking around, it's like the teasing only egged him on to bother you as well. Since that day, nothing could have prepared you for the antics and shenanigans Riki would add into your life. But you weren't complaining.

"What's going on with you and Riki?"

"Are you two dating?"

"Do you like him?"

You felt like you were being interrogated by your friends at the lunch table. Since they saw that Riki treated you for boba tea and cake, also they noticed how he would constantly do romantic things for you, which you had to try your best to explain how you were friends and that he was just a natural gentleman.

"Yeah, cause any guy would go out of their way to get you things in the middle of the night, offer to run errands for you, and buy you flowers just because...why not?" At this point, your friends were setting you up for failure since they were not letting you rebuttal and debunk their theories.

"Guys, I swear...we are just friends." shoving another spoonful in your mouth and rolling your eyes at your friends. Look, you had no issue with the constant teasing and shipping but sometimes they can push it.

"Oh yeah, then why is he coming over with a bag of goodies like he knows you're on your period today?" turning around, and yes, he was coming over to your table with a black plastic bag filled with necessities. "Hey yn, I picked up some stuff when I went to the convenience with the boys." He hands over the bag and you take it with a smile. "Wait, why did you-"

"I just took notice to your cycle-" Riki stops himself when he realized how shocked you looked and maybe started thinking that he was a psycho. "Oh- OH wait...did that sound weird...I'm sorry." soon after, you had to assure him that it was okay and that you never expected it.

After he leaves, you sit back down and face your friends who had a certain look and smile on their faces. Some of them raising their eyebrows at you, like they want to say "just friends, huh?"

"Don't even start" warning them but the look still remains on their face. Again, rolling your eyes and focusing back to eating lunch before you had to drag your feet to your next class.

Guess what? you have that next dreaded class with him.

Later, you're in your usual seat, re reading the notes in case the professor wants to suddenly have a pop quiz. So focused that you do not realize that he already sat next to you. "Do we have an exam that I don't know about?" eyes leaving the notebook to look at him, one bicep on the table, head held by his palm. He's rocking the same hip hop fit and classic smirk.

"Why do you have to stress yourself out like this, relax yn" taking the book out of your hands and closing it. Before you could say anything, he places it on his desk and looks back at you. "There's no pop quiz or exam, the professor isn't even coming to class."

"What if there's a substitute and they give us a task?" chuckling, he looks at the wall clock and gives you an ultimatum. "In the next 20 minutes, if no one shows up, let's get out of here and just hang?" This was nothing new, Riki has always proposed this idea to you but never got to happen. So, you always just say yes.

Usually after he would give the ultimatum, the professor or the sub with walk in. To which you see the disappointment in his eyes as he slumps in his chair, along with a "I hate this class".

But this time, it has passed 15 minutes and no one else but your classmates have entered the room. For those 15 minutes, Riki has been mentally planning on what he's going to do or where he's going to take you if you both do end up leaving. Why was he even nervous, he's been out with you, multiple times...but in groups.

Another 5 minutes goes by and before Riki could bask in his victory, someone from the faculty comes in. You smirk and rub his back jokingly. He looks back at you and sends you a death glare. "You hate me that much? You can't even spend an hour and a half alone with me?" As he starts pouting, the professor speaks up.

"Your professor won't be able to make it in today, he also did not leave any task or assignment, so you are free to go." now the reactions are switched, your smirk fading and Riki's pout turning into a smile.

Now, you find yourself in the newly opened cafe in the campus. With a very happy Riki. "Now that I think about it, you're stuck with me for 4 years, and maybe even beyond that. You know...after graduation." He sips on his coffee and whips out his phone. "What if I move schools?"

"Then I'll just have to follow you there." Taking a picture of the food and while you were looking out the window, he snaps a quick picture. "You look pretty, yn." its times like this where you start to question if your friends were right and maybe Riki has feelings for you, but you think back to his interactions with other females; he pretty much acts the same towards them...but does he call other girl pretty and take them out to more than just friendly dates?

"Riki, can I ask you something?" You couldn't let this live on anymore, you had to get a straight answer from him, getting the answer to this 'what are we' situation you both were in.

"Sure, anything."

"Even if it might change our friendship?" He pauses but bounces back quickly and proceeds to shrug. "It can't be that bad, shoot"

"Do you perhaps...like me? romantically?" Looking straight at him. "I just...I'm getting mixed signals from you and I-"

"I do"

"What?"

"I really do"

From that moment on, your freshman year was occasionally filled with Nishimura Riki.

In the beginning, everything was molded perfectly into your life, nothing seemed to overlap, had a handful academic stress but had resilience. Riki was the addition that you loved. In the beginning.

The first official date happened a week after that talk, Riki decided to go to your dorm room, which was extremely restricted to males, but somehow, he slipped through the wire and convinced you to go on a spontaneous date. He took you to a park and you two had a picnic and played soccer together. It was a fun time, getting to know Riki and him getting to know you on a different level and for a different reason.

The first kiss was when you were at a little group hang out, Riki and his friends separated from you and the others, only to come back with funny disguises; embarrassing you guys by dancing and singing loudly in the middle of the mall and only promising to stop if you kissed his cheek. Which you were going to do but he moved his face so you could kiss his lips.

The first 'I love you' was when it was spring break for freshman year when Riki had to go back to his hometown to visit his family. When you two were saying your goodbyes, you said the three little words.

As the sun dipped low on the horizon, casting a warm glow over the campus, you and Riki found yourselves standing beneath a blossoming cherry blossom tree. It was the last day before spring break, and Riki's hometown beckoned him back to his family.

Finally, with a soft sigh, you looked up at him, your gaze filled with affection and vulnerability. "I love you," you whispered, the words hanging in the air between you like delicate petals.

Riki's heart skipped a beat as he processed your confession, a rush of warmth flooding his chest. He felt a lump form in his throat, overwhelmed by the intensity of his emotions. "I love you too," he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper but filled with sincerity.

A little fast forward to second year, you were now both sophomores; still going strong as a couple. It been roughly 8 months since you two got together in February, during your freshman year. Now we stand in September, the very first day of your sophomore year. First day was always nerve wracking for you, no matter what because you have too much to look forward to but also so many things to worry about.

But still, your main focus and priority was still to be on the grind, work your butt off to get high grades, do extra-curricular activities, but still making times for friends and loved ones.

And that's what you made sure to do, months passed, and you were one of the few students who were on the top of their classes but still manage to have their own private life, to others; you make it look so easy.

"Got time for your boyfriend, or no?" Putting down your book and then sitting down next to you, Riki had a pout on his face, giving you puppy eyes. "You seem to like this book more than me these days" continuing to sulk until you give in and give him attention for the rest of the day.

"I just have an exam coming up, that's all." You try to reason but nothing ever seems to work for Riki, "I still reach out and keep you updated though" unfazed, he simple places his face to rest on his palm, still facing you with the same pout and puppy eyes. Sighing, putting down your reviewers and pens, asking him what he wants.

"I'm not taking you completely away from your study time, I know how important this is to you but take a break, let's go out and get some snacks, then we can come back here and I can study with you?"

Now you knew your boyfriend, and this man does not study. But somehow, still gets decent grades, far from a failing one. "You? studying, that's funny."

"Hey, I'm turning a new leaf, I want to match my smarty pants of a girlfriend." Rolling your eyes as you pack your things. After zipping up your bag, Riki goes to carry your bag for you, along with his.

You really felt like Riki was meant to be in your life and you were meant to be in his. The two of you just seemed too perfect for one another, as said by many people in your life. The support, love, and genuine care you have for one another was something you rarely see in college couples. Others tried to find a flaw in you two but somehow, nothing seemed to come to the light. Sure, there were small arguments here and there but even for your first big fight, you both never screamed nor yelled at ech other to get your point across. It was all clear and patient communication to fix whatever caused the problem. It was never you vs him, it was always you two vs the problem.

"Seriously, have you ever seen a more inseparable pair? They're like two peas in a pod!" Kai says while gesturing to Riki and You

"I know, right? I'm convinced nothing could tear those two apart." Hiyyih nods in agreement

"Yeah, not even a tornado or a zombie apocalypse could break their bond. They're like the ultimate relationship goals." Jay laughs as he watched you two from the distance.

"Hey, let's not jinx it. Knowing these two, they'd probably take on a zombie horde together and come out unscathed." Heeseung raises his eyebrows but says sarcastically.

-

"Can you calm down; you're stressing me out!" one of the guys on the dance team takes hold of Riki's jittering self. Clearly, he was under stress and pressure to do well in this event. "Yeah Riki, you'll do great, like always" Kai comes up to him and pats him on the back.

"Yeah, but this time, I have a solo part and what if I-"

"You won't. You're literally a born to be dancer and performer." there you are, what Riki needed right now. Walking into the room giving him the biggest hug you could give him but considering the height difference, you were more like a baby bear to him.

"You've got this, Riki. Just remember to breathe and let your passion flow through every movement."

"Thanks, Babe. I don't know what I'd do without you here."

The emcee's voice echoes through the speakers, announcing the next performance. Riki takes a deep breath, centering himself as he steps onto the stage, the spotlight illuminating his figure.

As the music begins to play, Riki's movements are fluid and graceful, his body seemingly moving in perfect harmony with the rhythm. Each step is imbued with emotion, a testament to his dedication and talent.

From the wings, You watch with bated breath, heart swelling with pride as you witness Riki's mesmerizing performance.

As Riki reaches the climax of his solo, the audience erupts into applause, their cheers filling the auditorium with thunderous applause. Your eyes shimmer with tears of joy as you rush forward to embrace Riki backstage, admiration for him overflowing.

"That was incredible, Riki! You were absolutely breathtaking up there."

There was someone in the crowd who thought the very same about Riki...Remember the talk where your friends were joking how nothing could tear you apart? Yeah, the 'nothing' was there at the auditorium.

It's a typical day on campus, with students bustling between classes and the air filled with the hum of activity. Riki is sitting in a lecture hall, scribbling notes furiously as the professor drones on about the intricacies of a science theory. Suddenly, there's a knock on the door, and the professor pauses, motioning for Riki to step outside.

Riki furrows his brow in confusion but follows the professor's lead, stepping out into the hallway where a man in a sharp suit awaits him. The man exudes an air of confidence and authority, and Riki's curiosity is piqued.

"Riki, I presume? My name is Hiro Endo. I was at your performance yesterday, and I must say, I was thoroughly impressed." Extending a hand

Riki's eyes widen in surprise, his heart pounding with excitement. He shakes Hiro's hand eagerly, his mind racing with possibilities.

"Thank you, sir. That means a lot coming from you. But may I ask what brings you here?"

"I represent one of the most renowned entertainment companies abroad, and I believe you have the potential to be a star. Your talent is undeniable, and I would like to offer you and a fellow member of your dance team an incredible opportunity to work with us."

Riki's heart skips a beat at the mention of such a life-changing opportunity. He glances around, searching for his friend from the dance team, who steps forward with a mixture of excitement and disbelief.

"I… I don't know what to say."

"Take a look at these documents. Everything is legitimate, I assure you. This is a chance for you to pursue your passion on a global stage, with all expenses covered and a generous compensation package."

Riki's hands tremble slightly as he flips through the documents, his mind whirling with the magnitude of the opportunity before him. He looks up at Hiro, his eyes shining with determination.

"I'll do it. I'll take the chance."

Hiro's smile widens, sensing Riki's commitment to seize the opportunity before him. With a firm handshake and a promise of further details to come, they part ways, leaving Riki with a newfound sense of purpose and excitement for the future.

As Riki returns to his class, the weight of the decision he's just made settles in his chest.

As Riki navigates the rest of his day, the weight of Hiro's offer hangs heavily on his mind. With each passing moment, the pros and cons of accepting the opportunity to go abroad to South Korea swirl through his thoughts, leaving him torn between excitement and apprehension.

During his next class, Riki finds it difficult to concentrate, his mind wandering back to the conversation with Hiro and the tantalizing prospect of pursuing his passion on a global stage. He imagines the vibrant dance scene in South Korea, the opportunity to learn and grow as an artist, and the chance to make a name for himself on an international level. But alongside the excitement, a nagging sense of doubt gnaws at him.

As the afternoon stretches on, Riki decides to seek solace in the one person who knows him best: Yn. He sends her a text, asking if they can meet up later that evening to talk. With each passing hour, the anticipation builds, and Riki finds himself grappling with the decision of whether to tell Yn about the offer now or wait until it's officially in writing.

On one hand, he wants to share his excitement and fears with Yn, knowing that she'll offer him the support and guidance he needs. But on the other hand, he worries about burdening her with his uncertainties and fears, especially when the offer is still tentative.

As evening falls and Riki meets Yn at their favorite spot-on campus, he takes a deep breath, steeling himself for the conversation ahead. He knows that whatever decision he makes, Yn will be by his side every step of the way. And with her unwavering support, he feels ready to face whatever the future may hold.

"Yn, there's something I need to talk to you about."

You look at him, expression a mix of curiosity and concern. Senses the gravity of his words and braces self for what's to come.

"What is it, Riki? You seem… tense."

Riki meets your gaze, his eyes reflecting a mixture of excitement and uncertainty "A talent agent approached me. He offered me an incredible opportunity to work abroad with one of the most renowned entertainment companies in South Korea."

Your heart skips a beat at Riki's words, a mixture of pride and apprehension washing over you. You knew this day would come, but the reality of it hits harder than anticipated.

"Wow, Riki, that's… that's amazing! Congratulations!" forcing a smile.

Riki reaches for your hand, his touch gentle and reassuring "I know it's a lot to take in, but I truly believe we can make this work, Yn. We've always been so good at communication, and with technology these days, staying connected will be easier than ever. Plus, think of all the opportunities this could open up for both of us."

Your heart aches at Riki's optimism, knowing deep down that your relationship will face challenges you both can't simply overcome with good intentions and video calls. Again, forces a smile, masking your inner turmoil as you squeezes Riki's hand gently.

Softly "Riki, I appreciate your optimism, I really do. But… but we both know that long-distance relationships are incredibly hard. And with your career taking off like this, I… I don't want to hold you back."

Now it Riki's heart to sink at your words, the weight of uncertainty hitting him like a punch to the gut. He had hoped you would share in his excitement, but now he realizes the depth of the fears and doubts.

"Yn, I… I don't want to lose you. You mean everything to me, and I can't imagine my life without you by my side."

Your eyes glisten with unshed tears as you meet Riki's gaze, voice barely above a whisper.

"Riki, I love you. And I want nothing more than to see you succeed and chase your dreams. But… but I can't ignore the reality of the situation. Sometimes love isn't enough to bridge the distance."

Riki's heart shatters at Yn's words, the realization dawning on him that their love may not be enough to overcome the obstacles that lie ahead. With a heavy heart, he pulls Yn into a tight embrace, holding her close as they silently grapple with the uncertain future that lies ahead.

"Yn, please… just hear me out. I know this won't be easy, but I truly believe we have what it takes to make it work."

Your gaze flickers with a mixture of longing and uncertainty, heart torn between the love you feel for Riki and the fear of the unknown that lies ahead.

"Riki, I want to believe that too, I really do. But… but how can we be sure? What if the distance becomes too much to bear?"

"Because I know, deep in my heart, that our love is stronger than any distance. We've overcome obstacles before, Yn, and this will be no different. We'll make it work, together."

"Yn, I promise you, with every fiber of my being, that I will do whatever it takes to make this work. I won't let our love slip away, not now, not ever. Please, just give us a chance."

With a trembling breath, you nods slowly, a flicker of hope igniting within you. "Okay, Riki. Okay, let's give it a try."

-

You wake up to the soft morning light filtering through the curtains, the warmth of Riki's embrace wrapping around you like a cocoon. With a contented sigh, you nuzzle closer to him, cherishing the fleeting moments of peace before the day's responsibilities pull you apart.

-

Hand in hand, you stroll through the vibrant bustle of the campus, the chatter of students and the rustle of leaves creating a symphony of life around you. With every step, you steal glances at Riki, committing the curve of his smile and the sparkle in his eyes to memory, knowing that soon they'll be but distant echoes in your mind.

-

Underneath the shade of a towering oak tree, you and Riki share a picnic lunch, the taste of homemade sandwiches and sweet strawberries a bittersweet reminder of the moments you'll soon leave behind. You laugh and reminisce, savoring the precious hours you have left together before the inevitable goodbye.

-

As the sun dips below the horizon, painting the sky in hues of orange and pink, you and Riki steal away to your favorite spot on campus, a secluded bench overlooking the city skyline. In the quiet stillness of the evening, you wrap yourselves in each other's arms, the weight of the impending farewell heavy on your hearts.

With a heavy sigh, you press your forehead against Riki's, the warmth of his breath mingling with yours in a silent exchange of love and longing. In the depths of his gaze, you find solace and strength, drawing courage from the unspoken promise that your love will endure, no matter the distance.

-

In these fleeting moments, Yn finds solace and strength in the love she shares with Riki, cherishing every precious second before they must part ways.

-

The airport terminal buzzes with the energy of travelers coming and going, but for you and Riki, the world narrows to a single, heart-wrenching moment. Hand in hand, you stand amidst the throng of people, your fingers intertwined as you cling to each other desperately, unwilling to let go.

Tears prick at the corners of your eyes as you gaze up at Riki, your heart aching with the weight of your impending separation. His face mirrors your own emotions, etched with sadness and longing.

"I don't want to leave you, Yn. I can't bear the thought of being apart from you."

You choke back a sob, your throat tight with emotion. "I know, Riki. I feel the same way. But… but we have to be strong. We'll find a way to make this work, I promise."

Your words hang in the air like a fragile thread, tethering you together in the face of uncertainty. But as the minutes tick by, the reality of your impending goodbye looms ever closer, casting a shadow over your fragile hope.

It's only when your friend Kai approaches, his expression solemn yet compassionate, that you realize the time has come to part ways. With a heavy heart, you turn to Riki, your eyes glistening with unshed tears.

"Guys, it's time. The boarding call has been announced."

Riki's grip tightens on your hand, his heart breaking at the finality of Kai's words. With a trembling breath, he presses a tender kiss to your forehead, his touch a silent vow of love and devotion.

"I'll never forget you, Yn. I'll carry you with me wherever I go."

Your voice catches in your throat as you return Riki's kiss, your heart overflowing with love and longing.

"I love you, Riki. Always and forever."

With one last lingering embrace, you reluctantly release each other, your hearts heavy with the weight of your farewell. With tears streaming down your cheeks, you watch as Riki disappears into the crowd, leaving behind a void that echoes with the echo of your love.

As you watch Riki's retreating figure, you cling to the hope that one day, your paths will cross again, and you'll find your way back to each other, stronger and more resilient than ever before.

The car ride home from the airport is silent, the weight of Riki's absence hanging heavy in the air. You stare blankly out the window, your mind a whirlwind of emotions as tears trace silent paths down your cheeks.

As the car pulls up to your doorstep, your phone pings with a notification. With trembling hands, you unlock the screen to find a message from Riki, accompanied by a selfie that pierces your heart like a dagger. In the photo, Riki's red eyes and tear-streaked face speak volumes, a stark reminder of the pain you both feel in your separation.

Your fingers tremble as you open the message, your heart breaking with each word.

Riki's Text: "Goodbye, Yn. I'll call as soon as I land. I love you, always."

"Yn, we're here for you. Lean on us, okay?" You look up to find Bahiyyih's compassionate gaze, her eyes brimming with empathy. Around her, Jay and Kai stand in solidarity, their silent presence a comforting anchor amidst the storm of emotions.

With a shaky breath, you nod, allowing yourself to be enveloped in the warmth of your friends' embrace.

-

As the third year of college unfolds, you find yourself immersed in a whirlwind of classes, assignments, and extracurricular activities, each day passing in a blur of busyness and routine. But amidst the chaos of student life, there's a quiet sense of contentment that settles over you, a reassuring reminder that even in Riki's absence, your love endures.

In the four months since Riki left, you've thrown yourself into your studies with renewed focus and determination, channeling your energy into academic pursuits and personal growth. The days blur together in a blur of lectures and late-night study sessions, but through it all, Riki's presence lingers like a guiding light, his love a steady anchor amidst the tumult of college life.

Despite the distance between you, your bond with Riki remains as strong as ever, nurtured by late-night phone calls, heartfelt messages, and the occasional video chat. Each interaction is a precious lifeline, a reminder of the deep connection you share and the promise of a future reunited.

As the weeks turn into months, you take solace in the knowledge that despite the miles that separate you, your love knows no bounds. And though the road ahead may be long and uncertain, you face it with courage and conviction, secure in the knowledge that no matter what challenges lie ahead, you and Riki will weather them together, stronger than ever before.

The soft glow of your phone illuminates the darkness of your room as you settle in for another late-night study session. With a tired sigh, you pull up your phone, a smile tugging at your lips as you wait for Riki's familiar face to appear on the screen.

After a moment, his face pops up, his eyes lighting up with a grin as he sees you. "Hey, love," he says, his voice warm and filled with affection.

"Hey, Riki," you reply, your heart fluttering at the sight of him. "How's your day been?"

Riki leans back in his chair, running a hand through his hair. "Busy, as usual. But seeing your face makes it all worth it."

You feel a blush creep onto your cheeks at his words, a warm rush of affection washing over you. "You're such a sweetheart," you say, unable to contain your smile.

For the next hour, you and Riki lose yourselves in conversation, sharing stories about your day and trading jokes and laughter. Despite the miles that separate you, the connection between you feels as strong as ever, each moment spent together a cherished reminder of the love you share.

As the clock ticks past midnight, you reluctantly bid Riki goodbye, knowing that another day of classes awaits you both in the morning.

In the bustling cafeteria, you and your friends gather around a table, the lively chatter of students filling the air with warmth and energy. As you dig into your lunches, a familiar face approaches you, a hopeful smile playing on his lips.

"Hey, Yn," he says, his voice tinged with nervousness. "I was wondering if you'd like to grab coffee sometime? Maybe go see a movie?"

Your heart skips a beat at the unexpected invitation, but you offer him a gentle smile. "Thank you, but I have a boyfriend. I appreciate the offer though."

With a disappointed nod, the guy retreats, leaving you to return your attention to your friends. But as you resume your conversation, a question lingers in the back of your mind, like a faint whisper of doubt.

It's Bahiyyih who voices the unspoken concern, her brow furrowed with curiosity. "Hey, Yn, what if someone else likes Riki? What if people start asking him out?"

Your heart clenches at the thought, a surge of protectiveness welling up within you. You take a moment to collect your thoughts before responding, your voice firm yet tinged with uncertainty.

"I trust Riki," you say, your words a quiet affirmation of your faith in your relationship. "And I trust in the love we share. If someone else likes him, well… it's flattering, but it doesn't change how I feel about him."

Later that evening, as you and Riki settle in for your nightly video call, you can't help but share a lighthearted moment with him. With a playful smile, you recount the encounter at the cafeteria.

Riki's laughter fills the screen, his eyes twinkling with amusement.

You chuckle at his teasing remark, feeling a warm flutter in your chest at his words. "Well, he definitely got the wrong idea. But it was kind of funny."

As the conversation winds down, you both find yourselves drifting off to sleep, the comforting presence of each other's voice lulling you into peaceful dreams. With your phones still on video call, you share a silent moment of intimacy, the soft glow of the screen casting a warm halo around your faces.

The next following months were just like that, Riki and you still communicated. Things were different, that's for sure.

Now, you were in your 2 months of the second semester of third year. Riki was now preparing for new upcoming performances, both of ypu had realized that in this time of year, you both are busy and have less time for one another.

As the clock ticks past midnight, you find yourself nestled in the familiar comfort of your dorm room, the soft glow of your phone casting shadows across the walls. With each passing minute, anticipation builds in your chest as you wait for Riki's late-night video call, a nightly ritual that brings you both closer despite the distance between you.

But as the hours stretch on, the silence of the room grows deafening, broken only by the soft hum of the ceiling fan and the distant sounds of laughter from down the hall. With each passing minute, a gnawing sense of unease creeps into your mind, overshadowing the excitement that had filled you earlier.

You check your phone for what feels like the hundredth time, hoping for a message or a missed call from Riki, but the screen remains stubbornly blank, devoid of any notifications. A frown creases your brow as you glance at the time once more, realizing with a sinking feeling that Riki's late-night call isn't coming tonight.

As the minutes turn into hours, you wrestle with a whirlwind of emotions, from disappointment and frustration to worry and concern. Thoughts race through your mind, each one more unsettling than the last. What if something happened to Riki? What if he forgot about your call? What if…?

With a heavy sigh, you push aside the barrage of doubts and fears, choosing instead to focus on the love and trust you share with Riki. You remind yourself that he's likely caught up in rehearsals or meetings, his busy schedule leaving little time for anything else.

But even as you try to rationalize his absence, a small part of you can't shake the feeling of loneliness that settles over you like a heavy blanket. You long for the familiar sound of his voice, the warmth of his laughter, the comfort of his presence.

With a resigned sigh, you resign yourself to another night spent apart, the glow of the phone screen casting a soft halo around you as you drift off to sleep, holding onto the hope that tomorrow will bring the reassurance and connection you crave.

As Riki steps into his apartment, exhaustion weighs heavily on his shoulders, a testament to the long hours spent at dance practice followed by a whirlwind of classes and meetings throughout the day. With a weary sigh, he kicks off his shoes and drops his bag by the door, his thoughts drifting to you, thousands of miles away in Japan.

Glancing at the clock, Riki's heart sinks as he realizes how late it's gotten. It's already well past midnight, and the thought of interrupting your sleep with a late-night video call fills him with guilt.

With a conflicted sigh, Riki debates whether to reach out to you anyway, knowing how much he craves the connection and comfort of your voice. But as he weighs the pros and cons, a sense of responsibility tugs at his conscience, reminding him of the importance of rest and self-care, both for himself and for you.

Reluctantly, Riki sets his phone aside, knowing that the late hour is no time to disturb your sleep. Instead, he resolves to send you a text in the morning, a simple gesture to let you know that he's thinking of you, even when they're apart.

As he settles into bed, the soft glow of his phone casting shadows across the room, he drifts off to sleep, wrapped in the warmth of your memory.

For Riki, the demands of his dance career and rigorous training schedule weigh heavily on his mind, leaving him little time or energy to devote to anything else. Each day is a relentless cycle of rehearsals, performances, and late-night practice sessions, leaving him drained and exhausted by the time he collapses into bed.

As the weeks slip by in a blur of obligations and responsibilities, you find yourself struggling to keep up with the demands of college life while navigating the increasingly distant landscape of your relationship with Riki. Despite your best efforts to stay connected, communication between you has become sparse and erratic, leaving you feeling adrift in a sea of uncertainty and longing.

Each day is a delicate balancing act, a relentless juggling of classes, assignments, and extracurricular activities, all while trying to carve out precious moments to connect with Riki. But no matter how hard you try, the distance between you seems to grow wider with each passing day, leaving you feeling increasingly isolated and alone.

The once constant stream of texts and calls has dwindled to a trickle, leaving you yearning for the warmth of Riki's voice and the comfort of his presence. Each unanswered message feels like a tiny dagger to the heart, a painful reminder of the growing chasm between you.

In the quiet moments of solitude, you find yourself haunted by doubts and insecurities, wondering if Riki still cares as deeply for you as he once did. The silence weighs heavily on your mind, casting a shadow over the once bright and hopeful future you imagined together.

But despite the uncertainty that clouds your thoughts, a part of you still clings to hope, holding onto the belief that love has a way of overcoming even the greatest obstacles. You remind yourself that distance is just a temporary hurdle, and that as long as you and Riki remain committed to each other, you'll find a way to weather the storm together.

And so, as the weeks turn into months, you hold onto the promise of better days ahead, trusting in the strength of your love to guide you through the darkness and into the light. For even in the midst of uncertainty, you know that with Riki by your side, anything is possible.

As you take a much-needed study break, you absentmindedly scroll through your social media feed, hoping for a momentary distraction from the weight of your thoughts. But as you idly flick through the photos and updates, your heart lurches painfully in your chest at the sight of a familiar face.

There, amidst the sea of posts and selfies, is a picture of Riki, his arm casually draped around the shoulder of a girl you don't recognize. The image is a stark reminder of the distance between you, a painful testament to the reality of your fading connection.

Your breath catches in your throat as you stare at the photo, your mind struggling to process the flood of emotions crashing over you like a tidal wave. Jealousy, hurt, and betrayal swirl together in a tumultuous whirlwind, threatening to overwhelm your fragile heart.

With trembling fingers, you tap on the photo, your heart pounding in your chest as you read the caption beneath it. "Fun day out with my favorite person ❤️ #love #happyducky"

The words hit you like a punch to the gut, each one a painful reminder of the intimacy and closeness shared between Riki and the girl in the photo. A sense of betrayal gnaws at your insides, leaving you feeling raw and exposed, as if your world has been turned upside down in an instant.

Tears blur your vision as you stare at the screen, your mind racing with a million questions and doubts. In that moment, as you sit alone in your room, surrounded by the suffocating silence of your own thoughts, the pain of heartbreak washes over you like a tidal wave, threatening to drag you under.

With a heavy heart and trembling fingers, you reach for your phone, the weight of the day's revelation pressing down on your shoulders. Despite the ache in your chest, you muster the courage to send a text to Riki, your fingers hesitating over the keys as you struggle to find the right words.

"Riki, we need to talk. Please call me when you get this."

With a shaky breath, you hit send, the message disappearing into the digital abyss as you wait anxiously for a response that never comes. The minutes stretch into hours, but your phone remains stubbornly silent, devoid of any sign of life from Riki.

As you climb into bed, the weight of uncertainty settles over you like a heavy blanket, casting a shadow over the once familiar comfort of your room. Despite your exhaustion, sleep eludes you, your mind consumed with thoughts of Riki and the painful realization of his betrayal.

With a heavy sigh, you curl up beneath the covers, your heart heavy with the weight of unanswered questions and unspoken truths. In the silence of the night, you find yourself grappling with a maelstrom of emotions, each one more overwhelming than the last.

As you drift off into fitful sleep, your dreams haunted by echoes of Riki's laughter and the warmth of his embrace, you can't help but wonder what tomorrow will bring. But for now, all you can do is wait, the uncertainty of the future looming large in the darkness, a silent reminder of the fragile nature of love and trust.

With a groggy groan, you roll over in bed, your hand fumbling for your phone on the nightstand. The sound of its insistent ringing fills the room, pulling you reluctantly from the depths of sleep.

Groggily, you glance at the caller ID, your heart skipping a beat as you see Riki's name flashing on the screen. Without bothering with a proper greeting, you answer the phone with a sassy tone, your words laced with a hint of annoyance.

"What, did you finally remember you have a phone?"

There's a moment of silence on the other end of the line, and you can almost hear the surprise in Riki's voice as he responds, his words tinged with uncertainty.

"Uh, good morning to you too, Yn. Is everything okay?"

Despite your frustration, a pang of guilt tugs at your conscience at the concern in Riki's voice. With a sigh, you relent, your tone softening slightly as you reply.

"Yeah, sorry. I just… didn't expect to hear from you, that's all."

There's a pause as Riki absorbs your words, his voice gentle as he speaks.

"I know things have been rough lately, but I want to talk about it. Can we meet up?"

As confusion swirls in your mind, you can't help but furrow your brow in disbelief. "What do you mean, meet up? You're in South Korea."

There's a brief pause on the other end of the line before Riki's voice comes through, filled with an unexpected urgency. "Just… open your front door, Yn."

Your heart races with anticipation as you rush to the door, your hands trembling with excitement. With a flick of the lock, you swing it open, your eyes widening in shock at the sight before you.

There, standing on your doorstep, is Riki, a sheepish grin spreading across his face as he holds up his phone in a gesture of greeting. "Surprise," he says, his voice tinged with excitement and relief.

Your jaw drops in astonishment, your mind struggling to process the surreal sight before you. "Riki, what are you doing here? How did you…?"

But before you can finish your sentence, Riki steps forward, enveloping you in a warm embrace that sends shivers down your spine. "I couldn't stay away any longer," he whispers, his breath warm against your ear. "I needed to see you."

Tears prick at your eyes as you return the embrace, your heart overflowing with a dizzying mix of joy, relief, and disbelief. In that moment, as you stand together on your doorstep, the distance and misunderstandings of the past few weeks melt away, replaced by the overwhelming certainty of your love for each other.

As Riki takes in the redness of your eyes, concern etches his features, but before he can voice his worry, you step back, breaking free from his embrace. His eyebrows furrow in confusion as he looks at you, searching your face for answers.

"What's wrong, Yn?" he asks, his voice filled with genuine concern.

You meet his gaze with a sassy smirk, your tone laced with sarcasm. "Oh, nothing. Just stumbled upon a cute little picture of you and your 'favorite person' on Instagram last night."

Riki's expression shifts from confusion to realization, his eyes widening in understanding. "Yn, it's not what you think—"

As you step back into the apartment, the weight of the moment hangs heavy in the air, a palpable tension swirling between you and Riki. But before you can retreat any further, Riki moves closer, his arms encircling you in a gentle back hug. His touch sends a shiver down your spine, the warmth of his embrace a stark contrast to the coldness of your heart.

"Yn, please," he pleads, his voice soft and pleading. "Let me explain."

You stiffen in his arms, your resolve wavering as his words wash over you. Part of you longs to hear his side of the story, to believe that there's a rational explanation for what you saw. But another part of you, wounded and betrayed, hesitates to let your guard down, afraid of the pain that lies on the other side of forgiveness.

With a sigh, you turn to face him, your eyes meeting his in a silent plea for honesty. "Fine," you say, your voice barely above a whisper. "But make it quick."

Riki nods, his expression earnest as he takes a deep breath, steeling himself for what comes next. And as he begins to speak, his words wash over you like a soothing balm, each one a testament to the depth of his love and the sincerity of his regret.

-

Throughout the week, Riki's presence brings a sense of warmth and familiarity to your home, filling the air with laughter and shared memories.

-

One lazy morning, you wake up to the aroma of freshly brewed coffee, courtesy of Riki's thoughtful surprise. As you join him at the kitchen table, he presents you with a steaming cup, his eyes twinkling with mischief. Together, you share intimate conversations over the warmth of your drinks, lost in each other's company as the morning sun filters through the curtains.

-

On a clear night, Riki suggests a spontaneous adventure: stargazing in the park. Hand in hand, you make your way under the twinkling sky, laying out a blanket to lie on. As you gaze up at the vast expanse of stars above, Riki whispers secrets and promises, his words mingling with the soft rustle of leaves and the distant hum of the city. In that moment, surrounded by the beauty of the universe, you feel closer to him than ever before.

-

In a burst of spontaneity, Riki challenges you to a pillow fight, the room erupting in laughter as pillows fly and giggles fill the air. You duck and dodge his playful swipes, retaliating with your own, your hearts racing with the thrill of the moment. Amidst the chaos and laughter, you share a connection that transcends words, a bond forged in the simple joys of being together.

These moments, filled with laughter, love, and shared experiences, serve as a poignant reminder of the deep connection and affection that binds you and Riki together.

But amidst the joyous reunions and heartwarming moments, you can't help but notice the subtle shifts in Riki's behavior, the fleeting glances at his phone and the whispered conversations that leave you feeling uneasy.

In the midst of a family dinner, you catch Riki sneaking glances at his phone, his brows furrowing in concentration as he types out a quick response to a message. At first, you brush it off as nothing more than the usual distractions of modern life, but as the week wears on, the frequency of his interruptions becomes harder to ignore.

During a quiet moment alone together, you voice your concerns to Riki, your words tinged with a hint of worry. "Is everything okay, Riki? You seem… distracted."

Riki's smile falters for a moment before he offers you a reassuring squeeze of the hand. "It's nothing, Yn. Just some work stuff I need to take care of."

Despite his words, a nagging sense of doubt lingers in the back of your mind, a silent reminder of the uncertainties that have plagued your relationship in recent weeks. But you push aside your doubts, choosing instead to trust in Riki's love and sincerity.

As the week draws to a close, you find yourself unable to shake the feeling of unease that gnaws at your insides. And then, one fateful afternoon, as you innocently reach for Riki's phone to check the time, you stumble upon a series of messages that shatter your world into a million jagged pieces.

With trembling hands and tears in your eyes, you scroll through the messages, each one a damning testament to the betrayal that has unfolded right under your nose. And in that heart-wrenching moment of truth, the painful realization dawns upon you: Riki's distractions weren't innocent after all. He was hiding something from you, something that would irreparably change the course of your relationship forever.

As you hold Riki's phone in your trembling hands, the weight of the truth settling heavily upon your shoulders, you're startled by the sound of the bathroom door opening. With a shaky breath, you quickly set the phone down on the bedside table, your heart pounding in your chest as you scramble to compose yourself.

As Riki emerges from the bathroom, his expression bright and carefree, you force a sleepy smile, pretending as though you've just woken up. "Hey, sleepyhead," he greets you with a warm smile, oblivious to the storm raging within you.

You return his smile with a forced one of your own, your mind racing with a million thoughts and emotions. Despite the urge to confront him, to demand answers to the questions burning in your mind, you hold back, choosing instead to bury your pain beneath a facade of indifference.

As Riki settles onto the bed beside you, his warmth seeping into your bones, you fight the urge to reach out to him, to seek comfort in his embrace. But as you steal a glance at his unsuspecting face, the memory of his betrayal looms large in your mind, a silent reminder of the shattered trust between you.

In that moment, as you lie there beside him, a silent tension fills the air, a palpable barrier that separates you from the man you once loved. And as you struggle to make sense of the turmoil within you, one thing becomes painfully clear: now is not the time for comfort or reconciliation. For now, all you can do is bide your time, waiting for the right moment to confront him and demand the truth.

As the days pass by, you find yourself grappling with the painful truth that hangs heavy in the air between you and Riki. Despite his attempts to maintain a facade of normalcy, his behavior remains unchanged, his frequent disappearances to answer calls or texts a constant source of unease.

Each time he slips away, you can't help but feel a pang of betrayal as you watch him, his smile once meant for you now a cruel reminder of the deception that lurks beneath the surface. And as he returns to the table, his kiss on your cheek feels hollow, a bitter reminder of the love that was lost amidst the web of lies and deceit.

In that moment, as you sit beside him, a silent tension fills the space between you, a chasm of unspoken words and unresolved emotions. And as you steal a glance at his unsuspecting face, a surge of anger and resentment wells up inside you, threatening to consume you whole.

But instead of giving in to the urge to confront him, you bite back the words that burn on the tip of your tongue, choosing instead to keep silent, to bide your time until the moment is right. For now, all you can do is play the part of the oblivious lover, keeping your true feelings hidden beneath a mask of indifference, all the while knowing that the truth will eventually come to light.

I played dumb, but I always knew That you talked to her, maybe did even worse I kept quiet so I could keep you

As the night stretches on, you lie awake in bed, your thoughts swirling in a tumultuous storm of emotions. Beside you, Riki shifts restlessly, his concern evident in the furrow of his brow.

"Yn, what's wrong?" he murmurs, his voice thick with worry.

But you remain silent, your mind consumed by the weight of your own thoughts. You know you should speak up, confront Riki about the truth you've discovered, but the words catch in your throat, suffocated by the fear of what might come next.

Sensing your hesitation, Riki reaches out to gently caress your cheek, his touch a soothing balm against the turmoil within you. "Please, Yn," he pleads, his voice barely above a whisper. "Talk to me. I can't help you if you don't tell me what's wrong."

But still, you remain silent, your heart heavy with the burden of your secrets. With a sigh, Riki pulls you close, wrapping you in his arms with a tenderness that threatens to undo your resolve.

"Fine," you finally whisper, your voice barely audible in the darkness. "Just… hold me tight until morning, okay?" And with that simple request, Riki pulls you even closer.

In the depths of the night, as sleep claims you in its gentle embrace, you find yourself drifting into a dream so vivid and beautiful that it feels almost like reality. In this dream, you and Riki are together, happy and content, living out a future filled with love and laughter.

You can see it all so clearly: the two of you walking hand in hand down a sunlit aisle, surrounded by friends and family as you exchange vows of everlasting devotion. You can feel the warmth of Riki's touch, the softness of his voice as he whispers words of love and affection into your ear.

Together, you embark on a journey of endless adventures and shared experiences, building a life filled with joy and happiness. You can see yourselves growing old together, still holding hands and stealing kisses even after decades have passed.

But then, in the quiet darkness of the night, reality comes crashing back with a cruel inevitability. As you stir from your dream-induced reverie, your eyes flutter open to the sight of Riki sleeping peacefully beside you, his features softened by the gentle glow of the moonlight.

In that moment, as you gaze upon his sleeping form, a pang of sadness grips your heart, the harsh truth of your situation looming large in the darkness. You know deep down that the future you envisioned in your dream will never come to pass, that the love you once shared with Riki has been tainted by betrayal and mistrust.

With a heavy sigh, you turn away from him, burying your face in the pillow as tears prick at the corners of your eyes. In the stillness of the night, you grapple with the painful realization that the dream you so desperately clung to will forever remain nothing more than a fleeting fantasy, a bittersweet reminder of what could have been.

In the soft light of dawn, you find yourselves once again at the airport, the familiar scent of departure lingering in the air as you stand on the precipice of another goodbye. But this time, there's a subtle shift in the atmosphere, a quiet sense of resignation mingled with a newfound sense of resolve.

As you watch Riki prepare to board his flight, a bittersweet smile graces your lips, a fleeting reflection of the conflicting emotions swirling within you. You know that saying goodbye to him will be painful, but deep down, you also know that it's the right thing to do.

As you stand at the airport, the weight of unspoken words hanging heavy between you and Riki, you can't help but feel a sense of urgency bubbling up inside you. With a glance towards him, you catch his gaze, a flicker of confusion crossing his features as he meets your eyes.

"I know, Riki," you say softly, your voice barely above a whisper, but laced with a quiet determination.

Riki's brow furrows in confusion, his lips parting as if to speak, but no words come out. He searches your face for answers, but you simply offer him a small, enigmatic smile, leaving him to grapple with the puzzle of your words.

As Riki boards the plane and takes his seat, the pieces of the puzzle begin to fall into place in his mind. With a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach, he realizes the truth behind your cryptic message, the weight of his actions crashing down on him like a ton of bricks.

As the plane taxis down the runway, Riki's mind races with regret and remorse, his heart heavy with the knowledge of what he's lost. In that moment of clarity, he knows that he may have let go of the greatest love he'll ever know, all for the sake of fleeting moments of temptation and desire.

And as the plane takes off, carrying him away from you and towards an uncertain future, Riki is left to grapple with the consequences of his choices, knowing that the pain of your goodbye will haunt him long after the plane touches down in a distant land.

As you sits in your car, watching through tear-blurred eyes as the plane carrying Riki disappears into the vast expanse of the sky, a wave of emotions crashes over you like a tidal wave. Tears stream down her cheeks unchecked, mingling with the silent sobs that wrack her body.

Memories of their time together flash before your eyes, each one a bittersweet reminder of the love you once shared and the dreams you two had dared to dream together. But now, all that remains is an empty void, a gaping hole where once there was warmth and affection.

-

Your phone buzzes insistently, pulling your attention away from the conversation with Jay and Kai. You hesitate, your thumb hovering over the answer button, torn between the desire to hear Riki's voice and the fear of worsening fresh wounds.

Jay notices your hesitation and raises an eyebrow. "Who's calling?" he asks, curiosity piqued.

You shrug nonchalantly, a forced smile playing at your lips. "Just someone from school," you lie, the words tasting bitter on your tongue.

Jay frowns, sensing your reluctance to answer. "You gonna pick up or what?" he prods, his tone tinged with impatience.

Your heart pounds in your chest as you weigh your options. You know that talking to Riki will only make things worse, but a part of you still longs to hear his voice, to find some semblance of closure in your fractured relationship.

In the end, you shake your head and decline the call, your hand trembling slightly as you set your phone back down on the table. "Sorry, just not in the mood to talk right now," you mumble, offering your friends a weak smile.

Jay nods understandingly, but you can see the concern etched in his expression. You know that your friends mean well, but there are some things you're not ready to share, some wounds too deep to be healed by mere words.

As the conversation shifts back to lighter topics, you can't help but feel a pang of regret at your decision to ignore Riki's call. But deep down, you know that it's for the best, that some bridges are better left unburned, even if it means sacrificing the chance for closure.

-

As Riki steps off the plane in South Korea, his heart heavy with the weight of his actions, he is greeted by a familiar face waiting for him by the gate. But instead of the usual excitement and anticipation he feels at seeing her, there's a knot of guilt and remorse churning in the pit of his stomach.

For the first time, he looks at her and sees not just the thrill of their secret trysts, but the pain and betrayal that his actions have caused another. He sees the hurt reflected in her eyes, a silent reminder of the consequences of his actions, and he can't help but feel a pang of regret deep within him.

As she approaches him with a smile, her arms outstretched in greeting, Riki can't bring himself to return the gesture. Instead, he hangs his head in shame, unable to meet her gaze as the weight of his guilt threatens to crush him.

In that moment, looking at her standing there before him, Riki realizes the magnitude of his mistakes. He knows that he can never undo the pain he's caused you, but he also knows that he can't continue down this path of deception and betrayal any longer.

With a heavy heart, Riki takes a step back, distancing himself from the girl he once thought he loved. And as he walks away, leaving behind the echoes of his past mistakes, he knows that the road to redemption will be long and arduous. But for you, and for the chance at a better future, he's willing to take that first step.

-

As the months flew by, the weight of Riki's absence lingered heavy on your heart, a constant reminder of the love you had lost and the wounds that still remained unhealed. Graduation loomed on the horizon, a bittersweet milestone marking the end of one chapter and the beginning of another.

Despite your best efforts to move on, Riki remained a lingering presence in your thoughts, his memory haunting you at every turn. It was a struggle to push him out of your mind, to silence the ache in your heart that longed for his touch and his presence.

But as graduation day drew nearer, you knew that it was time to confront the truth, to lay bare the painful reality of your relationship with Riki. With a heavy heart, you confided in your friends, finally revealing the truth that you had kept hidden for so long.

Their reactions ranged from shock to anger to profound sadness, but through it all, they stood by your side, offering their unwavering support and understanding. With their help, you found the strength to stop seeking updates on Riki, to let go of the need to know what he was doing or where he was going.

-

As you browse through racks of dresses with Bahiyyih by your side, laughter and chatter filling the air, your heart skips a beat when you suddenly catch sight of a familiar figure standing just a few feet away. Your breath catches in your throat as you lock eyes with Riki, his expression a mix of shock and desperation.

Time seems to stand still as the reality of the moment sinks in, the air heavy with unspoken words and unresolved emotions. For a brief moment, you're transported back to a time when his presence brought nothing but joy and happiness, but now, all you feel is a dull ache in the pit of your stomach.

Bahiyyih's eyes widen in disbelief as she takes in the scene before her, her hand reaching out to grasp yours in a silent gesture of support. She can see the pain etched on your face, the raw vulnerability that lies beneath the surface, and she knows that this unexpected encounter has dredged up a flood of emotions that you had long tried to bury.

Riki opens his mouth as if to speak, but no words come out. Instead, he simply stands there, his eyes pleading for forgiveness, his heart laid bare for all to see. But you know that forgiveness won't come easily, not after everything that has happened between you.

With a heavy heart, you turn away from him, the weight of his gaze burning into your back as you walk away. As Riki takes a step forward, his instinct urging him to chase after you, Bahiyyih steps in his path, her expression a mix of determination and concern. She places a gentle hand on his arm, her touch a silent plea for him to stop and reconsider.

"Riki, wait," she says softly, her voice tinged with urgency. "I know you want to talk to her, but now is not the time. She needs space, time to process everything. This..you, being back all of the sudden"

Riki's brow furrows in frustration, his heart torn between the desire to make things right and the fear of making things worse. He knows that Bahiyyih is right, that barging after you now would only add fuel to the fire, but it's hard to ignore the ache in his chest, the desperate longing to reach out and hold you in his arms.

Reluctantly, he nods, a heavy sigh escaping his lips as he watches you disappear from view. He knows that this won't be the last time he sees you, that there will be other opportunities to make amends, but for now, he'll have to trust that time and distance will heal the wounds that lie between you.

As you sit in your room with Bahiyyih by your side, a heavy silence hangs in the air, broken only by the soft sounds of your breathing. You're not crying, but your mind is elsewhere, lost in a whirlwind of conflicting emotions and shattered illusions.

Thoughts race through your mind like a raging river, each one a painful reminder of the walls you had built up around your heart in an attempt to move on from Riki. You had worked so hard to rebuild your life, to find happiness and fulfillment in the absence of his love, but seeing him earlier today shattered those fragile walls like glass.

In that moment, all the progress you had made feels like nothing more than a cruel illusion, a fleeting mirage in the desert of your heartache. You realize now that no matter how hard you try to forget him, to bury the memories deep within the recesses of your mind, he will always have a hold on your heart, a piece of you that can never be replaced.

And as you stare off into the distance, lost in the labyrinth of your thoughts, you can't help but wonder if it will ever be possible to truly move on from him. Will the ache in your heart ever fade, or will it linger like a shadow, a constant reminder of the love you once shared and the dreams that were shattered in its wake?

-

Riki finds himself sitting in Heeseung and Jay's dorm room, his heart heavy with guilt and regret. He knows that he's made a mess of things with Yn, and now he's desperate for advice on how to fix it.

Heeseung, ever the empathetic one, offers words of comfort and reassurance. "Look, man, we all make mistakes," he says, his voice gentle and soothing. "The important thing is that you recognize what you've done wrong and try to make it right. Yn is a smart girl, she'll understand if you're honest with her."

But Jay, ever the realist, isn't so quick to let Riki off the hook. "Come on, Riki," he says, his tone sharp and biting. "How could you let her suffer for months while you did nothing? You can't just waltz back into her life and expect her to forgive you. You've got to show her that you're willing to do whatever it takes to make things right."

Riki winces at Jay's words, knowing that he's right. He's let Yn down in the worst possible way, and now he has to face the consequences of his actions. He knows that it won't be easy, that he'll have to work hard to earn back her trust and forgiveness, but he's determined to try.

With a heavy sigh, Riki nods, his jaw set with determination. "You're right," he says, his voice firm. "I messed up, big time. But I'm not going to let Yn down again. I'll do whatever it takes to make things right, even if it means facing some hard truths along the way."

Jay's sharp gaze fixes on Riki, his expression one of curiosity mixed with skepticism. "What about the other girl?" he asks, his tone cutting through the tension in the room.

Riki's heart sinks as he braces himself to explain the tangled web of deceit and betrayal that he's woven. Taking a deep breath, he begins to recount the events that led him to this point, his words stumbling over the painful truth of his actions.

"I thought I could have it all," he admits, his voice heavy with remorse. "I thought I could keep Yn in the dark while I pursued something with this other girl. But it was all a lie, a foolish fantasy that only ended up hurting everyone involved."

As he speaks, Riki can feel the weight of his mistakes pressing down on him, threatening to crush him beneath their burden. But he knows that he has to face the truth, no matter how painful it may be.

Heeseung listens with a sympathetic ear, his expression one of understanding and compassion. "It sounds like you were in over your head," he says, his voice gentle. "But that doesn't excuse what you did. You need to take responsibility for your actions and make things right with Yn."

Jay's expression remains stern, his eyes boring into Riki with an intensity that makes him squirm uncomfortably in his seat. "You've got a lot of work to do, Riki," he says, his tone sharp. "You can't just expect Yn to forgive you overnight. You need to earn back her trust, and that starts with being honest with her about everything."

Riki nods solemnly, knowing that he has a long road ahead of him. But with Heeseung and Jay's support, he feels a glimmer of hope flicker within him. He knows that he may never be able to fully make amends for his mistakes, but he's determined to try, if only to prove to himself and to you that he's capable of change.

As you step out of the apartment building, your heart skips a beat when you see Riki waiting for you, a hopeful look in his eyes. Your resolve wavers for a moment, the sight of him stirring up a whirlwind of conflicting emotions within you.

"I'll walk you to school," he says, his voice gentle and pleading. "I remember how you don't like walking alone."

But you shake your head, steeling yourself against the pull of his words. "I got used to walking alone when you left," you say, your voice firm. "I don't need you to walk me to school anymore."

With that, you turn on your heel and begin to walk away, determined to put as much distance between you and Riki as possible. But to your dismay, he falls into step beside you, his presence a constant reminder of the tangled mess of emotions that still linger between you.

"No matter how far you walk, I'll always follow," he says quietly, his words a whisper on the wind. "I'll do whatever it takes to make things right, Yn. Please, just give me a chance to prove myself to you."

You can feel the weight of his gaze burning into your back as you continue to walk, the ache in your heart growing with each step you take. You know that giving in to him would only reopen old wounds, but at the same time, you can't shake the feeling that maybe, just maybe, there's still a chance for redemption and forgiveness.

As you walk to school, the weight of your emotions threatens to overwhelm you, and you find yourself unable to keep the floodgates closed any longer. With each step, the memories of the promises Riki made before he left come flooding back, taunting you with the bitter taste of broken dreams and shattered trust.

"Remember when you promised that we'd make it work, no matter what?" you begin, your voice tinged with bitterness and hurt. "You said that distance wouldn't be a problem, that we'd find a way to make it through together."

Riki's expression softens, a pained look crossing his features as he listens to your words. "I meant every word of it, Yn," he says, his voice filled with sincerity. "But I know that I messed up, that I let you down in the worst possible way. I'm not asking you to forgive me overnight, but I promise that I'll do whatever it takes to make things right."

But you shake your head, the walls around your heart still firmly in place. "Words are cheap, Riki," you say, your voice tinged with sadness. "You can't just expect me to believe you after everything that's happened. You had your chance to make things right, and you blew it."

Riki's shoulders slump in defeat, his gaze dropping to the ground as he struggles to find the right words to say. "I know that I don't deserve your forgiveness," he says quietly. "But I'm not ready to give up on us yet. Please, just give me one more chance to show you that I've changed."

You pause for a moment, the weight of his words hanging heavy in the air between you. As you finally reach the school gates, the tension between you and Riki hangs heavy in the air, a palpable reminder of the chasm that lies between you. With a heavy sigh, you turn to him, steeling yourself for the answer to the question that has been haunting you since the moment you saw that picture on social media.

"What did she have that I don't?" you ask, your voice trembling with emotion. "Was she worth throwing away everything we had?"

Before Riki can respond, you shake your head, cutting him off before he can offer an explanation. "It doesn't matter," you say, your voice tinged with resignation. "I hope she was everything you ever wanted, everything you couldn't find in me."

With that, you turn on your heel and walk away, leaving Riki standing alone at the school gates, the weight of your words echoing in the empty space between you.

As you take your seat next to Jay in class, the sour look on your face doesn't go unnoticed by him. Concern etches his features as he turns to you, his eyes narrowing with worry.

"What's wrong, Yn?" he asks, his voice low and filled with concern.

You hesitate for a moment, unsure if you want to share your troubles with him. But the words spill out before you can stop them, and you find yourself recounting the encounter with Riki on your way to school.

"He walked me to school," you say, your voice tinged with bitterness. "Like everything's fine and we're still together."

Heeseung and Kai overhear your conversation and begin to tease you mercilessly, their laughter filling the air as they poke fun at your discomfort. But Bahiyyih quickly intervenes, shooting them a stern look that silences them instantly.

Jay leans in closer to you, his expression softening with understanding. "Maybe he's being genuine, Yn," he says, his voice gentle and reassuring. "You know how much he cares about you. And besides, he came over to our dorm last night to talk. He seemed really sincere."

You chew on your bottom lip, the weight of Jay's words sinking in as you contemplate the possibility that maybe, just maybe, there's still hope for you and Riki. But despite the flicker of optimism that blooms within you, you can't shake the lingering doubt and uncertainty that clouds your heart. Only time will tell if Riki is truly genuine in his intentions, and whether or not you're willing to take the risk of trusting him again.

-

As you return to your apartment, the events of the day swirling in your mind, you're surprised to find the familiar scent of your favorite flowers wafting through the air. Your heart skips a beat as you step inside, your eyes widening in disbelief at the sight before you.

The entire apartment is adorned with bouquets of your favorite flowers, their vibrant colors filling the room with a sense of warmth and comfort. And lying on the couch, nestled among the blooms, is a beautifully wrapped gift with a note attached.

Your hands tremble slightly as you pick up the note, your heart pounding in your chest as you read Riki's words. In the letter, he pours his heart out to you, apologizing for his past mistakes and expressing his sincere desire to make things right. He promises to do whatever it takes to earn back your trust and forgiveness, begging for another chance to prove himself to you.

My Dearest Yn,

As I sit down to write this letter, my heart is heavy with regret and longing. I know that I've hurt you in ways that words can't even begin to express, and for that, I am truly sorry. I never meant to cause you pain, and yet, my actions have led us down a path filled with heartache and uncertainty.

I want you to know that I've spent countless nights lying awake, haunted by the memories of our time together and the mistakes I've made. I've replayed our conversations in my mind a thousand times over, wishing I could turn back the clock and make things right. But no matter how hard I try, I know that I can never undo the hurt that I've caused you.

And yet, despite everything, my love for you remains unchanged. You are the light that guides me through the darkness, the warmth that fills my soul with hope. I can't imagine a life without you in it, and the thought of losing you terrifies me more than anything else in this world.

I know that I don't deserve your forgiveness, that I've broken your trust in the worst possible way. But I'm willing to do whatever it takes to make things right, to earn back the love and respect that I've lost. I promise to be honest with you, to communicate openly and honestly, and to never take your love for granted again.

Please, Yn, give me another chance to show you how much you mean to me. I know that words alone can't heal the wounds that I've inflicted upon your heart, but I hope that with time and patience, we can find a way to move forward together, stronger and more resilient than ever before.

With all my love,

Riki

Tears prickle at the corners of your eyes as you read his words, the weight of his sincerity washing over you like a tidal wave. Despite the pain and uncertainty that still lingers in your heart, a small part of you can't help but be touched by his gesture, by the lengths he's gone to show you how much you mean to him.

But as you look around the empty apartment, the absence of Riki's presence casting a shadow over the room, you can't shake the feeling of unease that settles in the pit of your stomach. Will he keep his promises this time, or is this just another empty gesture meant to placate you?

With a heavy sigh, you set the letter aside and reach for the gift, the weight of it heavy in your hands. Whatever happens next, you know that the road ahead will be long and difficult.

As you carefully unwrap the gift from Riki, your heart flutters with anticipation, unsure of what lies within. With trembling hands, you peel back the layers of paper, revealing a beautifully crafted wooden box nestled inside.

Your breath catches in your throat as you lift the lid, revealing the contents within. Inside the box lies a treasure trove of memories, each one carefully preserved and presented with love and care.

There are photographs, snapshots of moments frozen in time, capturing the laughter and joy that once filled your days together. Each image is accompanied by a handwritten note from Riki, sharing his thoughts and feelings from those cherished moments.

But it's not just photographs that fill the box. There are letters too, pages upon pages of heartfelt words and declarations of love, each one a testament to the depth of Riki's feelings for you. As you read through them, tears prickle at the corners of your eyes, your heart swelling with emotion at the thoughtfulness and effort that went into creating such a meaningful gift.

And then, at the bottom of the box, nestled among the memories, lies a single red rose, its petals still fresh and vibrant despite the passage of time. It's a simple gesture, but one filled with meaning and symbolism, a reminder of the love that still blooms between you despite the trials and tribulations that you've faced.

As you sit with the gift from Riki in your hands, a nagging doubt creeps into the back of your mind, casting a shadow over the warmth and comfort that you felt moments before. Was this all just a ploy to win you back, a carefully orchestrated act of love bombing designed to manipulate your emotions and keep you under his spell?

The thought sends a chill down your spine, filling you with a sense of unease that you can't shake. You know that Riki is capable of great kindness and generosity, but after everything that has happened between you, it's hard to trust his intentions completely.

With a heavy sigh, you set the gift aside, the weight of uncertainty settling over you like a dark cloud. Only time will tell if Riki's gestures are sincere or if they're just another ploy to keep you under his control.

-

On a sunny Saturday morning, Riki wakes up early to prepare for the surprise picnic he's planned for you. He carefully selects all your favorite foods and snacks, making sure to pack them neatly into a wicker basket. With a satisfied smile, he adds a bottle of sparkling cider and a bouquet of your favorite flowers to the mix before heading out to the park. - After weeks of soul-searching and reflection, Riki sits down at his desk with pen and paper in hand. He takes a deep breath, steeling himself for the task ahead, and begins to write. With each word, Riki pours his heart out onto the page, expressing his deepest regrets and sincerest apologies for the pain he's caused you. He bares his soul, laying bare his thoughts and feelings in the hopes of winning back your trust. Hours pass as Riki fills page after page with his handwritten words, his emotions flowing freely onto the paper. When he finally finishes, he reads over the letter one last time, making sure every word is just right. The next day, Riki delivers the letter to you personally, his heart pounding in his chest as he watches you read it. - One evening, as you're scrolling through your social media feed, you come across a post about a movie you've been dying to see. You mention it in passing to Riki, not expecting anything to come of it. But to your surprise, Riki jumps into action, surprising you with tickets to the movie for that very evening. He clears his schedule for the night, ensuring that you have his undivided attention as you enjoy a night out together. As you settle into your seats at the theater, Riki reaches for your hand, his touch sending a shiver down your spine. Throughout the movie, he steals glances at you, his eyes shining with affection. - One evening, as you arrive home from a long day at work, you're greeted by the mouthwatering aroma of your favorite meal wafting through the air. Curious, you follow the scent to the kitchen, where you find Riki hard at work, surrounded by pots and pans. He looks up with a smile as you enter, gesturing to the spread of food laid out before him. "I wanted to surprise you with dinner tonight," he says, his eyes shining with excitement. "I hope you like it."

-

As the morning sun filters through the curtains, you awaken to the sound of your phone buzzing with notifications. Groaning, you reach for it, expecting the usual barrage of messages and emails.

But as you scroll through the notifications, your eyes widen in disbelief at the news that greets you. The message is simple yet profound, a single sentence that rocks you to your core:

"Riki quit his dancing job and came back to Japan for you."

Your heart skips a beat as you read the words again, unable to believe what you're seeing. Could it be true? Could Riki have made such a monumental decision, sacrificing everything he worked so hard for just to be with you?

With trembling hands, you dial Riki's number, your heart pounding in your chest as you wait for him to pick up. When he finally does, his voice is filled with warmth and affection, a stark contrast to the uncertainty that fills your own heart.

"Yn," he says, his voice soft and filled with emotion. "I know that I've made mistakes, but I'm willing to do whatever it takes to make things right. I love you, and I'll do anything to prove it to you."

Tears prickle at the corners of your eyes as you listen to his words, the weight of his sincerity washing over you like a wave. In that moment, you know that you have a choice to make, a choice that will determine the course of your future.

[sorcerersseestars]

LIMERENCE (part I)

Gojo Satoru x gn!reader

"I can't stop loving you, no matter how hard I try."

summary: Your long-time friend stirs feelings inside you that you never realized existed. Of course they bubble up in your chest while he’s in the midst of ignoring you and discovering his own possible romance. Your mutual friend thinks she has it all figured out—or does she?

pairing: gojo satoru x gn! reader

fandom: jujutsu kaisen

genre: hanahaki sickness au, angst, hurt/comfort, drama, slow burn!

warnings: mentions of feeling sick, being stonewalled kinda, usage of the word (Y/N) bc Gojo is too fed up for nicknames (in reality idk what else to use 😶), Gojo being an ass (common theme in my fics oops)

word count: 3.6k

a/n: This is the first part to my hanahaki au! I’ve had this in my drafts for the longest time, but never committed to writing it all out until now. This first bit is kinda slow and maybe confusing BUT hopefully I’ll be able to clear it up next chapter. Not proof read very thoroughly; will probably regret later 🫥

part ii part iii

“DON’T YOU THINK you could be a bit nicer to me?” You try, clasping your hands together as you look up at him with an odd smile—a cross between apologetic and playful. You’re joking, or at least half joking. It’s too difficult to be serious with Gojo; his habit of masking emotion with jest must be rubbing off on you.

Only one corner of his mouth raises. “Good one, (Y/N)-chan. As if I didn’t use to pay your bills.”

He doesn’t look at you when he speaks, and he walks away from you without a single glance. You frown and lightly jog a few steps to catch up to him.

“Ah, and I’m forever thankful for that!” You say, cringing at how overly peppy your tone is. “But that’s not exactly what I meant.”

“Hmm,” Is all he says. His hands are in his pockets, but he doesn’t carry himself with as much ease as usual—his posture is closed off, angular and tense.

“What I meant was–” You prompt your own answer, as he doesn’t make any move to. “We haven’t seen each other in a while. I know you’ve been really busy lately, so I don’t blame you, but I think we should go out and do something. Could help relieve some work stress too, don’t you think so?”

“Maybe,” He says, the word short yet effective in its delivery. The word was sharp in his mouth, clear annoyance shaping his tongue enough for the word to have a bite to it.

You wince. He never used to be like this. Gojo has been in a state of perpetual mirth—and one could argue levity—for the entirety of your friendship, never taking anything seriously and always looking for opportunities to poke fun at you to half-jokingly glorify himself. His expression has always been infectiously positive—never molded into anything hard or serious.

But, lately, everything you thought you knew about Gojo Satoru has faded away into your memories. He never seeks out your presence anymore, which is polar opposite from your high school days, when he would follow you around and pester you until you’d hang out with him. You actually used to get annoyed at this behavior, but you’re sorely missing it now.

You feel like you know nothing about him these days, only hearing tidbits here and there from your mutual friend Shoko. It stings to know that he obviously talks to her, and quite often at that, seeing she always has new details to spill every other day.

It doesn’t make sense to you: him and Shoko were never particularly close, definitely not nearly as close as you and Gojo were. In fact, she thought of him as particularly annoying in high school, and often swore to you that she would cut all contact with him once they graduated.

Back then, you had rolled your eyes at her antics, never believing that anybody could cut Gojo out of their life, seeing as he simply wouldn’t let them. But how else could you describe what he seems to be doing to you?

You bite your lip nervously. “Satoru? Is there something wrong?”

“Not particularly,” He says with a forced smile that’s screaming for you to shut up. You pretend like it’s not the most disingenuous smile you’ve ever seen smeared on his face.

“Are you sure?” You probe. “I mean…what’s been going on with you these days? We haven’t seen each other in forever, and you don’t seem yourself.”

“Are you sure?”

His lips are quirked up, as they perpetually are, but it’s different this time. It’s mocking. A mocking smirk that’s telling you to face reality. Do you really know him anymore?

You pause in your steps, studying his expression. You can’t see his eyes, but you wish you could. He’s hard to read with that blindfold concealing those powerful eyes of his, but it never used to be a problem. It hurts that you’re now struggling to gauge him when your emotions used to feel like one.

Evidently, you can’t answer his question. Not that he seems to care.

“I’ve really got to get going. Students to teach, curses to kill, all that,” He announces, tone low and apathetic. Bored. “See ya.”

Your breath flutters in your throat as you try to bid him goodbye. You choke on your words and only end up tentatively raising a hand. Before you can wave, his form disappears. A gust of wind greets you in lieu of a proper goodbye.

You stay where you are for a few shocked moments, not even registering the hot tears that leak from the eyes he avoided.

You wander aimlessly around campus for a while, the whole interaction replaying in your head several times over. His “Are you sure?” needles its way into your brain even when you push it away, the words hitting where it hurts every time.

Your feet find themselves taking you to an empty break room – ah, this is the one that has your favorite flavor of tea. You turn the kettle on, then eagerly dig through the tea stash. You file through the individual packets quickly and thoroughly, but to no avail. It’s gone.

With a sigh, you grab a random tea bag and throw it into your mug. Frustrated, you roughly begin pouring the now-boiled water into the mug, but it doesn’t seem that was a good idea. Your hand slips for just a split second, but a sizable splash of boiling water still manages to singe your non-dominant hand. A stream of expletives leaves your mouth, and you instantly cradle your hand to your heart.

More tears appear. At least you have an excuse this time—it fucking hurts.

You trudge to the clinic, feeling quite silly, but also seeking some much-needed relief. And you’re not exactly imagining painkillers or an ice pack—no, there’s something else. Someone else.

You hesitantly knock on the door. You feel stupid, but you really have to see her.

You crack a smile at the creak of the door. Your friend and co-worker Shoko strides out with an air of confidence you wish you held.

“What happened?” She asks calmly, eyes lazily taking in your form.

“Spilled some water from the kettle,” You say lamely. “It hurts.”

That doesn’t really constitute a visit to one of the only reverse-cursed technique users in the school, and you know it. So does she.

“Mmhm,” She raises her eyebrows. “Well, come on in.”

You shuffle in a little sheepishly, not able to meet Shoko’s eyes. Now that you’re here, you start to feel unsure about your own motive—do you really want to discuss this? Won’t it just be embarrassing more than anything else?

You stall a little in your steps as the negative thoughts invade your head. You’re startled to attention by a poke to your side—when you look up, Shoko’s playful smirk fills your vision.

“Come on over to the sink and we’ll put that under some cool running water,” She says, gesturing to your reddened arm.

You cock your head, looking between her and the sink skeptically, “No ice?”

She shakes her head, sticking her tongue out at you a bit, “Nope! Running water for burns.”

You hold up your hands in defeat, smiling, “Whatever Doctor Shoko says.”

“And I do,” She says cheekily. “So get under that water!”

“Aye-aye,” You say with a salute.

She groans, “Ugh. You guys are so annoyingly similar. Hang on a sec, I gotta grab something.”

She turns away before she can see the way your expression drops. The smile is stolen from your face, leaving behind saddened eyes and a slight frown. There’s only one possible person she could be talking about.

You sigh and turn on the faucet—your disheartened sigh morphs into one of great relief as the cold water soothes your burn.

“That better?” Shoko asks upon her return.

You nod, a small smile coming back, “Yeah, thanks Shoko.”

“Is there something else wrong?” She asks, then shakes her head. “No, scratch that. What’s actually wrong?”

You take a deep breath. How are you going to broach this subject? You wait several moments, pondering your exact next words.

“Do you think Gojo is okay?” You finally ask your long-time friend, words coming out almost cautiously.

She eyes you funnily, “Why are you asking me? As if he doesn’t chase you around the school to blab on about himself.”

You smile, but it’s tainted by bitterness.

“Shoko…Gojo hasn’t talked to me for two months,” You admit quietly. “I don’t know what’s going on.”

She stops.

“What?”

You hate hearing the confusion in her voice. You hate the pity that soon fills her eyes.

“He seriously hasn’t,” You affirm, sighing. “I don’t know what I did, or if I did anything, or…or what. I just, I don’t know what’s going on.”

“Have you tried talking to him about it?”

You sigh. “Of course I have, but he didn’t seem to take my concerns seriously. Or consider them at all. It just seemed like he wanted me to shut up and leave him alone.”

Shoko looks at you curiously, lips quirking as if she has something to say, but no words come out. Is she holding something back?

You take a deep breath, willing the horrible emotion that squeezes your throat away. You look out the window to distract yourself, watching the branches of a sakura sapling swaying in the wind. It looks alone and lost, battered by the relentless wind.

“What’s he been like recently with you?” You finally ask, your gaze still on the tree.

“Normal,” Shoko says. “Annoying as ever. Noisy as ever.”

A cluster of pink petals is ripped from a branch, swirling hopelessly to the ground. When they settle on the ground, you look back to your friend.

“He’s really the same?” You ask weakly.

“Unfortunately,” She says wryly. “Besides, why do you care? We’ve both been trying to get him off our backs since waaay long ago. Sounds like a blessing in disguise.”

“Ah, that’s true,” You admit with a weak chuckle, trying to ignore the way your heart throbs painfully. “But he’s also our friend.”

“Since when? More like a thorn in my side. Maybe he finally got the message,” Shoko smirks. “You should give me instructions for that. I’d have a lot better quality of life, you know.”

You know she’s just joking around with you, but she’s truly just rubbing salt in your wound. Not very ethical for a doctor, even if unintentional.

“Yeah,” You laugh, but it’s an empty sound. “Well, I guess I’ll get going then. Hopefully your next patient gives you an easier time.”

Shoko jokes, “Yeah, this has been my toughest job all week. You fiend.”

Your head is filled with so many questions, all of them growing louder as you walk away from your friend. Your friend who you thought would sympathize with you, but only ended up making you feel worse in the end is acting suspicious. It’s not like you’ve ever wanted to actually cut ties with Gojo, even when he used to pull pranks on you in high school. You craved for a strong friendship with him throughout all his shenanigans.

Why is Shoko acting like you hate Gojo, and what isn’t she telling you?

Before you reach the door, you decide you need to know. You stop abruptly in your tracks.

“Ieiri, you’re not telling me something,” You say softly, not looking back. “Why?”

Shoko sighs, pinching the bridge of her nose, “You don’t miss anything, do you?”

You say nothing. The door in front of you is tempting—it’s your way out of knowing the truth. Do you really want to know?

You wait tensely for a few seconds, the silence causing nerves to bubble up in your stomach. But when Shoko begins to speak, they go don’t go away.

“He hasn’t really been acting strange around me, but he’s constantly on his phone. Like always. Whenever he comes to chat, he immediately tunes me out and starts texting or loudly takes a call,” She snorts, huffing out an exasperated sigh. “I thought he was just bored and trying to make me feel disrespected as a sort of cruel joke, but I think it’s something else. I think…I think Gojo is interested in someone.”

Your head whips around, disbelief clear in your features. Interested in someone?

“Maybe that’s why he’s been acting weird. I always thought he was crazy for you, so it didn’t cross my mind until now.”

“Crazy for me?” You immediately echo back, voice hollow and confused.

Shoko shakes her head at you, “C’mon, you can’t be that oblivious. He always followed you around like a lost puppy in high school. He never said anything to me about it, but I really thought he would confess any day for years.”

“He did that to everyone…” You shake your head. “You say yourself he bugged you so much.”

She rolls her eyes. “Trust me, it was different.”

Your heart pounds in your chest. Your vision becomes foggy at the edges, reality fizzling out.

“Why didn’t you want to tell me?” You ask. “It’s not like that matters.”

You try to appear uncaring, yet it was a fight to get those words out.

“You’re a sensitive person. ‘Didn’t know how you’d react since Gojo always seemed to chase after your attention, exclusively. But it’s not like it was the other way around—should have known it wasn’t a big deal. It’s not. Guess he’s just growing up.”

“Yeah,” You agree faintly, voice devoid of emotion. Reality is slipping through your numb fingers, the information turning your world into a nightmare. You should have opened the door and ran when you had the chance.

“It’s not,” You say with a saccharine smile, one so sickly sweet that Shoko gets chills. That’s not your usual smile—not one that Shoko has ever seen you wear. “Of course it’s not.”

When you turn on your heel and rush out of her infirmary, Shoko reaches out a hand and her lips part to call after you. It’s uncharacteristic for her—the cold doctor is rarely sentimental or emotionally affected, but she saw something ghastly in that smile of yours.

The slam of the door answers her call. The truth, now imparted, comes to bite her in the ass.

It’s been a few days. You’ve been moping around the school, around your students—trying to cope with the information that you don’t even know is true. You see him across campus sometimes; he’s so easily spotted with his translucent hair and tall frame. Every time, he’s facing away from you, and your eyes fall on the back of his head. Your chest always tightens and you end up turning away, too.

You have ignored the feelings stirring in your chest, not willing to admit something that clearly isn’t reciprocated. It has been working, you suppose, since you haven’t cracked under the mental weight of possibly being in lo—

No, you can’t even think that.

Everything has been as okay as it can. It’s not until you attempt to visit Shoko again to try sort out your feelings, however, that things take a turn for the worse.

Your hand is raised as you prepare to knock on the infirmary door, but you hesitate once you hear muffled voices.

“I don’t know…I didn’t expect it at all.”

That’s Gojo’s voice. That low but self-assured tone is undeniably his.

“Expect what?” Shoko asks, sounding bored.

His reply is so soft that it passes by as just a hiss of air, so quiet that you physically startle at Shoko’s loud reaction.

“No! What? I can’t believe that!” She shouts, laughter quickly following her exclamation.

You shouldn’t be listening—you hadn’t planned to eavesdrop on your two best friends, but for some reason your ear seeks out the wall, as if magnetized.

The next three words uttered still your heart.

“Utahime kissed me,” Gojo admits quietly.

You feel like you can’t breathe. Utahime, who has always despised Gojo even beyond Shoko’s extent. Utahime, who once cried into your chest after Gojo was harsh with her at an exchange event. Utahime, who always persisted that you and Gojo were into each other during high school.

Shoko’s unbelieving chuckle cuts through your thoughts.

Shoko laughs, “Oh, yeah, okay, as if I’d ever believe that.”

There’s silence. Your heart drops at the lack of response—no teasing refute, no playful faux playboy attitude.

Shoko absorbs his unusual silence, finally interpreting his words for what they are.

She gasps loudly, spluttering, “Oh my God, you’re being serious. What?! There’s no way…”

Gojo’s voice is even and deep. “I didn’t lie. She just did it out of nowhere. I didn’t even know how to react, to be honest.”

“So you just stood there?” Shoko snorts, trying to keep up her usual sarcastic persona. “God, you’re insufferable all the way around.”

“I kissed her back,” He breathes out, voice almost weak.

Another long moment of silence ensues. You hold your breath, terrified that your panicked pants will alert them of your presence.

Shoko recovers quickly this time.

“Still insufferable,” She sighs, and you can imagine her shaking her head. “So what now? You like her or something? This is so random.”

“I…I don’t know,” He admits quietly. “I never thought she’d do that, it took me by surprise. I…I think I liked it?”

Your heart shatters. You clutch a hand to your mouth, gagging yourself, forcing back the pained gasp that’s threatening to leave your lips.

“Oh, is that so?” Shoko says drily, but the usual edge to her voice is absent. You can only imagine her expression: contorted with pity and pain, desperately trying to maintain her poker face.

“Yeah,” Gojo reaffirms. “It was nice.”

There’s silence for a few seconds as Shoko takes it all in. Then, “Is she who you’ve always been calling and texting when I’m talking to you? You’re an ass for that, by the way.”

Gojo exhales out a sardonic sniff, “You’re spot on.”

Why are you still listening? You should leave. You shouldn’t be hearing this. Pain blooms in your chest, as if thorns became lodged between your ribs.

“What about (Y/N)?”

You freeze, eyes bulging out of your head.

Gojo sighs, sounding annoyed, “What do you mean?”

“I’m not dumb, Satoru. There was something going on during high school and frankly in the past few years as well. Are you going to deny it?”

He scoffs, “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Shoko. It was never like that.”

You feel like you’re going to be sick. You shouldn’t—there’s no possible way you’re actually in love with Gojo Satoru, is there?

Fuck. The thought you’ve been trying to avoid all this time has finally firmly inserted itself into your head.

You take off swiftly and immediately, and your footfalls are as light as you can possibly manage. If either of them knew you were here, you wouldn’t be able to handle the shame.

Gojo and Shoko are none the wiser to the immoral action that took place just beyond the door—so when Shoko is ready to clock out and opens the door, the presence of a school ID on the ground is nearly missed. She feels something strange crunch underneath her foot and steps away and glances at the foreign object.

You left in such a hurry that your ID flopped out of your pocket. It lays on the ground, your smiling face staring up at Shoko, who looks on in horror. She immediately knows that you heard everything. She quickly steps back onto your ID, concealing your identity with her foot.

With all the sight of his six eyes, Gojo somehow completely missed Shoko’s strategic maneuvers to erase traces of your presence. He whistles nonchalantly, not having a care in the world, apparently.

In contrast, Shoko’s mind is racing. Her eyes roam around the courtyard, searching for your form. She feels rooted to the spot—will she reveal you if she steps away? She almost forgets that she’s not alone.

“You looking for someone?” Gojo asks.

Shoko stiffens, but forces herself to relax and appear nonchalant. “Ah, I was just wondering if…if (Y/N) would still be around.”

Gojo frowns. “Hm. Not sure. Don’t they usually go home right after they get off?”

“Lately, they’ve been staying back to do paperwork,” She sighs. “Masamichi has really giving them too many missions…How come you don’t know that?”

“Haven’t had the chance to catch up, I guess,” Gojo says evasively, then quickly changes the subject. “Besides, aren’t you the same way? You coming or not? I’ve got better things to do.”

He waves his cell phone around playfully, a smirk widening across his features.

Shoko rolls her eyes, “Go ahead. I’m just going to wait here a bit and see if I can text them and get them over here.”

She hesitates for a second before adding, “Actually, why don’t you wait a sec? We haven’t all seen each other in a bit.”

Gojo immediately stiffens. He scratches the back of his head and says, “Ah, I’m actually sort of on a time crunch. Maybe next time.”

What a lie. Shoko thinks, eyes narrowing subconsciously. What is he up to?

As he trails off into the distance, the gears in Shoko’s head continue to turn. He always, always teleports home after work finishes. So why is he slowly walking around campus, head turning this way and that way as if searching?

And you! Why were you there? Why were you so affected? What is going on in your head—or rather, your heart?

Something strange is going on with her two friends and Shoko is determined to find out what.

next part

credit 🩷:

@kiyaedits - baby pink dividers, @sweetxmelody - cherry blossom divider

*note: taglist open!! comment to be tagged in part 2 :)

[eustasskidagenda]

omg hi hi! i adore your writing so much :3! if its alright with you, could i get headcanons for how crocodile, law, kid, and ace would be with an autistic s/o who loves to infodump, but is nervous to do so. theres always this odd bit of shame that accompanies infodumping for me because i get so excited i cant properly articulate myself *lays down* its just a mess of stimming, stuttering, and laughing at my own jokes. i feel embarrassed after, even if its totally an illogical response. im unsure if you write for autistic y/n so feel free to ignore this if you dont. thank you so much <33

☆Crocodile, Law, Kid & Ace with an autistic s/o who loves to info dump 

Hello, dear anon! I'm not used to write autistic y/n, because I don't know enough about this and I wouldn't like to be harmful. However, the situation you're describing is something close to ADHD, which I know well. So I've made some additional researches to be sure and come up with something, I hope you will like it. Thank you for your request, it was a sweet one ♡

CW : g/n reader, slight curses for Kid, fluff 

WC : Around 1,500 words

Crocodile 

Crocodile doesn't talk much, he's always serious and quiet. It's just that he's often thinking about his business and plans. But he's a good observer and would immediately notice if you want to say something but are too nervous to do it. He knows you perfectly, so he would recognize the way you're fidgeting.

He's a man with good manners, so his first reflex would be to lock the door and make sure no one can enter and destabilize you. When it's done, he will point his chair towards you.

"Sit. I'm listening, y/n." 

Actually, he likes hearing you speak during hours. He knows it's a way to express your love and feelings. He's flattered that you want to share your world with him. Go ahead and speak, he will listen. Even if he's just nodding or commenting short sentences in response, he has a good memory and will remember everything you said to him. 

If you're talking too fast and start to get really flustered, he will let you know that you're speaking too fast, like 'y/n, what did you just say?' 

Your hyper-focus and info-dumping are appreciated by Crocodile because he enjoys learning new things and you're a source of knowledge. Maybe he's impassive and struggles to express his feelings, but sometimes you will hear him talk about what he learned with you, so clearly he listened to every single word. 

"Don't be ashamed, it was interesting. Can we talk more about this specific point?" 

If you say something that he is really curious about, he has no shame asking for more. It's a way for him to express his genuine care for you. For him, it's a way to prove to you that even though he's always quiet, he cares.

Law

Law is similar to Crocodile in his lack of emotional expression and limited speech. He is always busy, struggling with his parasitic thoughts and taking care of his patients. Finding some private time with you is a challenge for him. 

If you run into Law with excitement about your passion or new hyper-focus, he may feel embarrassed because it's not the perfect time for him. Autism is something he knows about, and he is an intelligent and educated man. And, he wants to make you feel safe and comfortable. 

"I'll be yours in a moment, y/n-ya."

He has a complete understanding of you and is an excellent observer. The way you're already blushing, fidgeting, and swallowing nervously. He can even hear your heart racing. So first thing first, he will tell you to take a deep breath. After all, he’s a doctor. 

"What do you wanna talk about?" 

As Crocodile, he's a great listener. When you're full of passion and excitement, he thinks you're cute. He likes the sound of your voice. He loves when you want to find him and talk about your passion, because you're offering him a break from his work. If you weren't there, he would be stuck either in work or in his own head. When he's with you, he can forget about his dream of avenging. You're his safe place, truly. 

He doesn't speak a lot. But he is listening.M and asks questions from time to time.

"Yn-ya, there's been no urge. Take your time." And if you're stuttering a lot, he would just say nothing because it's pointless to make a remark, as long as he can understand what you're saying, he will never say something about your elocution. 

"That's interesting, where did you learn that much?" 

Law is a curious and intelligent man, so he likes to learn more about almost everything. If it can help him with his plans or maybe his patients, it might even be beneficial for him.

During your bedtime together, he would ask you to talk about your passions. The way you talk and laugh is like his own lullaby. When you speak, he can find inner peace because it shuts down all the voices in his head. He might fall asleep sometimes when he feels tired. It's just that you're providing him with some relief. When he wakes up, he would be deeply sorry. "So, yesterday, you stopped at this precise point… what were you trying to say after?"

Kid 

Kid is so goddamn loud. And really passionate. He's focused on his goal of becoming the next PK and has loved mechanics and robotics since childhood. He would be aggressively sweet, like frowning when he notices how stressed and nervous you act towards him. "Hey, Y/N, why are you so fucking nervous? Just speak" 

He thinks you're cute with your cheeks all red. On the flip side, he's a bit confused. Why are you nervous? Is it his fault? He knows he's loud, hard to love and rough, but he cares about people he likes. Have you seen how he acts with Killer and his crew? He loves his people. 

And, as a punk, Kid is marginalized. He knows a lot about being different, and if you feel ashamed about it, he can understand. "Come on y/n, let's find a private place" 

Grab your wrist in an aggressive yet sweet way and lead you to his workshop or bedroom. He sits you on the bed with his arms crossed and eyebrows raised. "Now we're alone." 

So, you start talking nervously. It doesn't matter if the topic is interesting to him or not, he will listen. Because as I said, Kid is a passionate. Everything can be made interesting by passionate people. So, yeah, talk about birds, cakes, plushies, or anything stuck in your head. He will like it. And he enjoys the sound of your voice. He’s even flattered to be your special someone, the one you’re looking for when you need to talk. It fuels his ego and pride.

He will deal with your stuttering as he deals with Killer's laugh. He'll shut up and smash all the people making fun of you if there's something you hate about yourself. You're his s/o, no one can laugh at you and continue to live without facing his rage.

"Goddamn, slow down" yes, not the best with kindness, but at least he's paying attention. 

He wouldn't help but think you're really cute, with your eyes shining as you finally manage to relax and express how passionate you are. He understands your excitement because when he talks about robots, music, punk or weapons, he's exactly the same. 

Kid is not the most culturally advanced, it depends on the topic. He enjoys learning new things thanks to you or Killer, it's important for him to be credible, and he hates looking inferior in front of others. 

"See, there was no reason to be that nervous" When you finished speaking.

Just poke your cheek, grin and leave a mark of lipstick on your front-head before returning to his activities and yelling proudly to everyone he knows everything about the subject you just info-dump about.

Ace

The sweetest. Ace's personality is both compassionate and protective. He grew up with Luffy, so passionate and talkative people are something he knows a lot about. As he's proud of his brother, he's proud of you and can listen to everything you say for hours. 

"Y/N, is there something wrong?" 

Yeah, he would immediately notice that you're starting to get nervous. His first reflex is to find a more private place, if that's not already the case. He wants to do everything to make you feel safe and loved. If it's winter or just cold, he would even use his DF to warm the room. As soon as you're all comfortable, he'll run his fingers through your hair. "You know I will always listen." 

Ace doesn't speak a lot about what's on his mind. He's way too stubborn and always struggles with guilt due to the blood running through his veins. So he enjoys having someone like you. Your voice is soothing him, and he loves how passionate and honest you are always. 

For him, it's even amazing and unreal to have someone talk to him. You're treating him like a normal human and not a failure, because he feels like it often: unloved, unwanted and unworthy.

"Sweetie, you don't have to rush, we have the time, I'll always listen" if you start to speak too fast.

Would entwine his fingers with yours when you're stuttering and laugh heartily at your jokes. You remind him of his dear little brother. He feels lucky to have you by his side. 

"I could listen for hours." And he's totally honest.

If someone makes fun of you, he's truly mad. You are as significant to him as his brother or Whitebeard. And if someone makes fun of his loved-one, Ace is merciless and really impulsive.

"Please, say more about this specific point!", "Oh, really, that's so funny?" He wants to make you talk even more. Until you're finally relaxed and able to speak without stuttering, blushing, or anything else. He doesn't mind it, even if it lasts for hours. Once you're done, he has his usual sweet smile on his face. "That was so interesting, why are you so embarrassed?" 

So you explain to him that you feel embarrassed about your info dump because you're afraid to annoy people or talk too fast etc." It's alright, you won't bother me." 

You're his sunshine. He feels loved with you. He feels more than just the son of someone; he's just Ace, and that's the most beautiful thing in the world for him.

Such a sweet boy. ♡

[the-virgoperspective]

Part 1

The Moon in composite is one half of the most important luminaries and one of the most vital sources of energy in a relationship. It complements the Sun and represents the medium through which the Sun’s energy expresses itself. The composite Moon indicates how well the relationship acts as a medium of emotional expression for the two. The house position of the composite Moon shows the area in which you feel, or ought to feel, that you have the most in common.

I will be using the writings of Robert Hand from his novel “Planets in Composite: Analyzing Human Relations” to describe the meaning and significance of the Moon in each composite house. Please always keep in mind that this is only one vital step to reading an entire composite chart and should not be seriously considered without viewing everything as a whole. This is just one piece. Enjoy!

1H Composite Moon

Composite Moon in the first house makes clear that in this relationship your feelings and emotions are very prominently involved. It is not a cool or distant relationship in which the two of you treat each other as distant objects. You will be in there with all your feelings working.

Obviously, this placement is favorable to any relationship in which you want to relate on a close, intimate level. However, it can create some problems that must be dealt with if you want to derive the greatest benefits from this configuration.

As the planet of emotions, the Moon emphasizes the subjective side of any matter. A prominently placed Moon can, at its best, indicate a very sensitive relationship in which the two of you know intuitively what is going on inside each other. You have a deep emotional understanding of how you get along. But the Moon can also create such a strong emotionalism that you are unable to stand back and look at yourselves clearly in terms of your relationship. In other words, your subjectivity overwhelms your ability to see each other objectively. Be careful to avoid such extreme emotional involvement.

The Moon also rules the past and the contribution each of you makes from your individual experience, so these factors will be very important to you. A first-house Moon is usually a strong indication of an important personal relationship. It should give the two of you a strong sense of emotional compatibility. You will feel that you belong together and that you have much in common, which will indeed be true.

2H Composite Moon

Composite Moon in the second house indicates that this relationship will bring out the needs you both have for emotional and material security. In fact, you may have come together because of those needs.

You will have a strong sense of shared values, which will help to reinforce you as a couple against the undependable and changeable outside world. Because of this shared feeling, your relationship will grow strong even when there are considerable difficulties between you. You will be reluctant to give up the emotional security granted by the Moon in this position, even when things get tense. But the need for security could keep you together even when that is not the best solution for either of you.

One minor problem that this placement can bring about is that your need for emotional security can lead to a compulsive gathering of physical objects. You may try to satisfy your need for emotional security through owning things together. In this case your relationship will come to be symbolized by great quantities of material possessions. Beyond a certain point, possessions can become a millstone around your neck that limits your freedom of movement. Particularly if this is a marital relationship, you might be trapped into staying together because of what you own rather than because the relationship is working well. Like everything else, possessions must be kept in their place.

Nevertheless, the security that this relationship can offer should be one of its strongest points and should help keep you together when the going gets tough.

3H Composite Moon

Moon in the third house implies that this relationship is based largely on feelings. The third house is the house of the mind in its day-to-day functioning, and in a relationship it indicates the normal attitudes and opinions that you share. When you are together, you think about yourselves more subjectively and are more influenced by your emotions. You communicate with each other primarily through feelings rather than through intellect, so communication between you is likely to be mostly nonverbal.

Because you have a strong sense of shared opinions and viewpoints, you may not really need to communicate so much on an intellectual, verbal level. But at the same time, because communication within the relationship is so subjective and emotional, it may be difficult to discuss things rationally and objectively when you have to.

You may talk quite a bit about your collective feelings, which obviously is good in a personal relationship if you keep your sense of perspective and don’t overdo it. Do not let this tendency degenerate into making mountains out of molehills.

In a marriage or love relationship you are likely to be involved to an unusual extent with relatives, who may in some way contribute to the emotional stability of the partnership.

4H Composite Moon

The fourth house is in some ways the most natural position for composite Moon, for there is a strong analogy between this house and Cancer, the Moon’s sign.

With this placement it is extremely important that the two of you share a common background or experience, for it is likely to be a strong force binding you together. You may feel that you are alone together in a crazy world, protected only by your shared attitudes and origins. However, it is not so important that your backgrounds be truly similar as that they have given you similar basic attitudes to the world.

Even more than in a relationship with a second-house Mon, you are together to give each other emotional security. And here again the security is very likely to take the form of sharing real estate or a house. This is an excellent position for a marriage partners or roommates because of the strong sense of sharing it can induce.

However, it is necessary to warn you that your desire for emotional security and the related tendency to seek material security should not become the sole factors binding you together. Also your need for a secure relationship must not lead you to repress the legitimate gripes you may have with each other. Let your partner know how you feel; your relationship is probably strong enough to stand the strain.

A fourth-house Moon is most favorable in a relationship in which you set up housekeeping together. For this reason it is a good position in the chart of a marriage.

5H Composite Moon

Composite Moon in the fifth house suggests that your relationship exists because it makes you both feel good, especially emotionally. Traditionally, the fifth is the house of amusement, love, and children. One could also call this the position of recreational relationships, in which self-expression is a principal aim. Obviously this is a good house position for any kind of personal relationship, especially a love affair. You will enjoy each other’s company immensely, and together you will seek out parties, the theater, nightclubs, and all kinds of good times. These experiences will be important in your feeling of what you share with each other.

The major deficiency of this position is that you may find it difficult to settle down to anything serious. This can be especially difficult in a marriage or long-term love relationship, for you can’t always have fun and games; at some point you have to work at the serious business of building a relationship together.

If this is a marriage, children are likely to assume an important role in your life together. With this position of the Moon, you will probably want to have children, and you will have them.

For the pleasantness in a relationship, this is one of the better Moon placements. It ensures that you will be able to express yourselves emotionally with each other easily and fully.

6H Composite Moon

The sixth house is a rather somber and serious placement for composite Moon. It suggests that you have a sense of having come together for a specific and necessary task or purpose that may not be completely pleasant. One of you may feel subordinated to the other in some way. Therefore, this is a difficult placement for any relationship that requires you to give and take equally, as most relationships do. One person may feel like a doormat for the other; he or she is likely to get tired of that position and revolt against the other.

The only way to make this position work is for the two of you to exchange services equally, thus preventing it from becoming a one-way affair. This may be more difficult than it sounds if one of you is determined to be a martyr, especially since a martyr usually demands some kind of repayment that is very difficult for the other to make.

A related danger is that one of you is giving more to the relationship emotionally than the other, you could become quite resentful about it.

Whatever the costs. You both must strive to be more nearly equal in giving and receiving. Otherwise, this relationship will become quite unpleasant.

Find part 2 here!

ᡣ𐭩 ombré divider by @cafekitsune ᡣ𐭩

[physalian]

When To Keep Your Writing Stiff (pt 7)

Part 6

Part 1

Gonna shoutout a specific fanfic, “Salvage” (ATLA) for writing that is even leaner than mine is, and mine has zero fat whatsoever. This was really good. I particularly like how some scenes were only 2 or 3 lines long as an example of what I’m going for here.

When I say “stiff” in the following examples I’m specifically talking about a lot of the same syntax, few similes and metaphors, few ‘said’ synonyms, very little, well, “life” in the prose. And this can be good in a few situations.

1. Your narrator is in shock

Shock doesn’t all look the same, but the kind of shock I mean is the one where the person is really quiet and un-emotive, they’re probably not speaking or reacting much to whatever catastrophe just happened and probably not responding to their name or anything spoken to them. Their body is pretty much going “uhhhhhhhhh factory reset!” when whatever it is, is too much to process.

A asks them a question. Once. Twice. B stares ahead. There’s a brown stain on the wall that looks like a thumb.

So if they’re narrating, they’re probably going to be giving the absolute bare minimum, need-to-know information and won’t be thinking about the best adjectives and adverbs. Especially if you normally write with fluffier prose, a jarring shift like this can really help sell the shock and dissociating of the character, something so traumatizing that it effects how the story is told.

2. Your narrator is depressed

Somewhere between New Moon’s 4 pages of just Months to show Bella did absolutely nothing in a depression rot and normal prose (though it was effective, particularly in the movie when they could draw out the words on the screen for longer and did the whole spin-around-her-depression-chair montage).

January came. It rained a lot.

They’ll probably either narrate very thinly, or listlessly. They might focus on a random detail and start going on a long ramble about that one detail that isn’t at all important, but it’s either all they can think about or all that can move them to feel anything in this moment, like:

On the bedside table, that coffee mug still sat there in a thin sheet of dust. What had been liquid now long since dry and gluey. It still sits there, collecting cat fur.

This might be the best place for sentences that all sound and flow exactly the same, but use it sparingly.

3. Your narrator is having a panic attack or trapped in a traumatic situation

Different from shock in that while they are physically capable of moving and interacting, they can’t let themselves describe what they’re seeing and feeling in grand detail. Maybe they’re moving through the horrific aftermath of a battle and all they can describe is the mud under their feet and how it squelches. Or they simply say that “there’s bodies everywhere” because looking too long or too hard at who those bodies belonged to is too much.

4. You’re writing something that has incredibly fast pacing

This post was inspired by a fic I just wrote that spanned about 5 months in about 18k words. Narrative was skipping days ahead between paragraphs at some point as my character was processing the end of an abusive relationship. It sped up and slowed down where necessary, but compared to its sequel that I also just finished (22k words across 7 days), I’d covered a whole month in about 2 sentences in the first one.

See nearly any part of Salvage (or my fics if you feel like it)

What happened in that month didn’t matter, only what was before and what’s different now and how this character realizes how their life is slowly changing, some things they never noticed that are suddenly right in their face or things that quietly slipped away.

—

TLDR; sometimes the lack of emotion and sensory details and frenetic, dynamic syntax is the point, that can sell the reader on the narrator’s mental state far better than picking the juiciest adverbs. If it’s so impactful to them that the physical telling of the story is changed, you’ve done your job.

[chiqelatasblog]

In the Middle of the Night🌙

-> Ao3 link is here.

-> Part Four is here.

Pairings : Bi-Han/ Sub- Zero x Reader, Kuai Liang/ Scorpion x Reader, Tomas Vrbada/ Smoke x Reader

Author’s Note : I apologize for the delay! The past couple of weeks have been incredibly stressful for me. I had several meetings and had to write protocols for my client’s case. Additionally, I visited a friend who was staying in a different province, four hours away from where I live. Everything seemed to overlap (and to top it off, even my menstrual cycle was 17 days late due to the stress). But now, everything seems to be settling down, and I’ve managed to clear my mind and focus on writing this chapter as soon as possible. I decided to split this chapter into two parts because I felt it would have a better impact, and I wanted to give the final chapter its own spotlight. I hope you enjoy reading it! Thank you for your patience and understanding.❤️

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CHAPTER FIVE : (READER)

Until now, you never thought that you could fall in love with three people at the same time.

You didn’t realize a few months ago that such a thing was possible, but now it felt as natural and normal to you as breathing. It was as if Bi-Han, Kuai Liang, and Tomas had always been a part of your life. You got used to their presence so easily that now it’s hard to imagine your life without them; you were so attached to them. It was a fact that you didn’t know them until a few months ago, but although you couldn’t quite describe it, it felt as if your souls had known each other for a long time. Your movements resembled pieces of a jigsaw puzzle—they were so complete. There was a nonverbal communication between you; sometimes you could effortlessly communicate without speaking, even just by looking. This situation was very special and unique for you, as you had never made such a connection with anyone before.

Each moment spent with them felt like a blessing. When Bi-Han’s stern gaze softened just for you, it made you feel cherished in a way you had never experienced before. Kuai Liang’s calm presence was a sanctuary, a steady anchor in the chaos of life. And Tomas, with his unyielding loyalty and kindness, filled your heart with warmth and light. The bond you shared with them was deeper than mere friendship. It was an unspoken promise, a silent understanding that no matter what happened, you would stand by them. You hadn’t yet said it out loud to any of them, but you loved all three with a special bond and emotion. Your actions and looks might have betrayed your feelings, but you lacked the courage to put it into words.

You would find yourself watching them, feeling an overwhelming sense of gratitude and affection. The way Tomas’s eyes glinted with mischief when he teased you, or how Bi-Han’s rare, gentle smiles made your heart flutter. Kuai Liang’s reassuring touch or kiss on your shoulder during moments of doubt spoke volumes about his unwavering support. Each of these little things cemented their place in your heart, making it impossible to imagine a future without them.

They had become a part of you, woven into the very fabric of your existence. And even though the words were yet to be spoken, your heart had already made its choice. They were the kind of people you would want to keep hidden in your heart forever, to protect and watch over.

Loving Tomas was like experiencing spring. He wasn’t as serious as his two brothers; he was polite, with a naivety that softened the expression in his light gray eyes, making them irresistible to look at. Despite the scars on his soul from a very young age, Tomas was brave. He was the first person to choose to trust you, and that trust felt like a precious gift. His sense of humor was not only funny but remarkably similar to yours, making your conversations a source of endless delight. His presence was like feeling the gentle warmth of the sun after the harsh cold of a long black winter. Every moment spent with him was filled with hope and joy, like the first flowers of the season blooming and signaling new beginnings.

His love was tender and kind, much like the soft rain that revives the earth after a prolonged drought. Being with him allowed you to embrace your inner child, escaping the harsh realities of life. You found joy in the simple pleasures of watching TV shows or movies together, taking care of mundane tasks, having small, meaningful conversations, and spending time with Ninja. His ability to bring simplicity and happiness into your life made every moment with him feel like a cherished memory in the making.

Loving Kuai Liang was like experiencing summer. His body was warmer than normal due to his pyromancy, and you found yourself surrounded by a gentle, safe warmth next to him, especially when wrapped in his strong arms. It was such a soothing feeling that most of the time, it made your eyelids feel heavy and sleepy because of the peace you felt. Although touching Kuai Liang was wonderful, he was afraid to touch you because of his dark past, fearing that he might tarnish you. When you heard that, it felt like you had been shot in the brain, and your heart painfully squeezed thinking about what this strong man had been subjected to. None of them had told you exactly what they had been through in the past—you knew bits about what happened with Leilani and a few other masters, but nothing more—but it wasn’t difficult to guess. So you left it entirely up to them to control the speed at which they wanted to move forward in the process. You wanted them to know that they had this power, that they had a say.

Every time you spent with Kuai Liang filled you with a vibrant energy, warming you to the core like basking in sunlight. His love was wild and passionate, yet he was also incredibly kind; it set your soul ablaze, much like the intense heat of a scorching day. You felt comfortable next to him, his presence enveloping you like warm summer nights. You enjoyed walking outdoors with him, cooking together with his help (especially since discovering his distinct fondness for sweets last week), chatting about past missions, and witnessing the proud expression on his face when you asked him to show his powers.

Loving Bi-Han was like experiencing winter. His true self, which emerged after overcoming his initially harsh and inaccessible exterior, exuded a unique warmth that demonstrated winter was not just about coldness. Like soft snowflakes falling to the ground in the serene beauty of a winter landscape, his touch was gentle and filled with longing. Though not as openly expressive as his two brothers, you could sense his love in the way he touched you or looked at you every time. Despite the coldness that seemed to envelop him, his gaze held a warm invitation that melted away the chill, filling you with a warmth that drew you to him.

Unlike Kuai Liang, Bi-Han was not one to avoid contact. Although the ice forces surrounding him usually caused harm to both himself and others, this rule didn’t seem to apply to you. Since realizing this, it was as if he couldn’t stop touching you. He never verbalized it, but every time a part of his body—his arm, hand, or leg—came into contact with yours, it was evident how much he cared. Though his touch initially felt cold and eerie, you soon grew accustomed to it, even finding it addictive. Despite appearances, Bi-Han served as the cornerstone among the brothers, keeping them united and shielded with his protective and steadfast demeanor. Being included in that circle filled your heart with love and made you feel special.

Even though Bi-Han was the last to let down his walls around you, getting used to him was quick and effortless, much like with the other brothers. You enjoyed conversing with him about his clan, listening to him describe his daily routines, and especially watching the city view in the evenings. The silence felt peaceful rather than suffocating, allowing for a range of unexpressed emotions to be felt in that moment. Moreover, witnessing his moments of care for Ninja when he thought no one was watching was another detail that melted your heart.

You were deeply connected to three men in a way that scared you a little. Your emotions were incredibly intense—the love you felt for them, their choice to trust you despite their painful pasts, the respect you held for their strength and courage, your anger at the injustices they faced, and your desire for revenge. You had never experienced such emotions so clearly and intensely, shaking you to the core. It was somewhat frightening, as your priorities suddenly shifted to them instead of yourself. Your sole focus became freeing them from the clutches of the book and its curse, with less than a week and a half remaining until the deadline.

Despite your efforts, you hadn’t found a solution yet. Since the owner of the book could only summon them once, you wouldn’t be able to see them again after the time limit passed. The thought of this damned you, filling your heart with great fear at the prospect of what they might face if Sektor failed to protect them when he came to retrieve the book after you, and it fell into the hands of a new person.

You were prepared to do whatever it took to prevent this outcome, but the lack of a solution filled you with terrible anxiety and drove you to the brink of madness. Just two months ago, your biggest concern was unemployment and paying rent, but now your problems had evolved into something entirely different. Your own worries seemed insignificant compared to the future of the men you loved. Breaking this curse had become the most important thing in your life right now.

Bi-Han’s change in attitude towards you had somewhat lessened the effect of the curse on you. However, it remained a relentless force, constantly gnawing at you in a corner of your mind. Whenever you were close to Tomas, Kuai Liang, or Bi-Han, it seemed to roar in your mind, filling you with a desire that was hard to resist. Your skin practically begged you to touch them, and sometimes the desire was so intense that it felt like you were engulfed in flames—it hurt and clouded your judgment, making you feel almost foolish. At times, the urge became so overwhelming that finding refuge in the bathroom seemed to be the only solution. While your fingers didn’t always provide the satisfaction you sought, they at least allowed you to regain some semblance of control. But the lingering feeling in your mind never disappeared. It was akin to eating without feeling satiated—it was relentless and unyielding.

Each passing day seemed to bring a new level of torment, as if the curse intensified with every sunrise. The pain became unbearable, almost akin to torture. You couldn’t eat, sleep, or even think properly in the last couple of days. Functioning normally seemed impossible, and at times, it became so overwhelming that even breathing felt like a challenge. You didn’t know how to endure this any longer. You were painfully aware that each day was worse than the last, and yet there seemed to be no end in sight. You were drowning in a sea of agony, struggling to keep your head above water.

Despite the agony you endured, you were determined to bear the burden alone. You knew that all three of them wanted to help you, hating to see you suffer. Yet, you couldn’t bring yourself to accept their help. You didn’t want them to be involved with the curse in any way. Forgiving and moving on with your life would be impossible if they intervened, so you chose to ignore them and continue caring for yourself in your own way.

Thrusting your hands into the pockets of your raincoat, you gazed up at the reddening sky, returning from yet another unsuccessful job interview. How you wished the answer lay somewhere out there. You had tried everything written in all the sources you could access, masking your disappointment even as each failure chipped away at your hope. Trying to guess how they felt and what they were thinking only added to your frustration, yet you refrained from showing it, knowing they needed your support more than your despair. In the ten years since they were cursed, they had endured far more disappointments than you had faced in two months. You could imagine how futile it must have felt for them to continue hoping. They had exhausted their strength fighting disappointment after disappointment, opting instead to cherish the present moment—a reality that broke your heart a little.

The fact that they had accepted their situation and grown tired of fighting weighed heavily on you. Yet, you couldn’t blame them for choosing this path. Instead, you took it upon yourself to fight for them. However, with each passing day and no solution to the curse in sight, a heavy weight descended upon your shoulders, threatening to crush you. Despite the growing despair, you knew you had to keep fighting for them. You were their only hope, their only chance at breaking the curse.

Witnessing them struggle against the influence of their past only intensified your own turmoil. Despite Tomas sometimes managing to fall asleep, there were nights when he woke up with unfamiliar eyes, as if he didn’t recognize where he was, his body stiffening as if his breath would be snatched away. Occasionally, you were able to calm him down in the morning, but even then, Tomas seemed powerless against his own imposing body.

Kuai Liang, on the other hand, often woke up drenched in sweat from nightmares, avoiding your attempts to soothe him. He repeatedly muttered about his fear of contaminating you too, leaving you barely holding yourself together as you fought the urge to tightly embrace him. His pain was palpable, almost physically hurting you.

As for Bi-Han, there were times when he hadn’t slept for days, his body tensed with the need to protect them from imagined external dangers, leaving small traces of ice and freezing cold wherever he passed. Rings of exhaustion encircled his eyes, his face taking on a statuesque and lifeless appearance, his gaze fixed on the windows and doors. It took you hours to convince him that there was no imminent danger and coax him into relaxation.

All three of them exuded danger; their capabilities to take lives were apparent from their looks and the threatening aura they emitted. Their muscular, powerful bodies spoke of a lifetime of training for combat. This reality became especially clear when they touched you—it was too easy for them to cause harm if they chose to. They possessed a suppressed power that pained you to witness. Despite being honorable men, it must have wounded their pride and soul to see themselves in such a vulnerable state.

Your train of thought was abruptly halted by the sound of someone calling your name. As you lifted your gaze from the sidewalk, you were met with the sight of a stranger standing beside Sektor, the same man you had encountered weeks ago under rather peculiar circumstances. Sektor, as formal as ever, greeted you, his black hair streaked with long gray tufts and his neatly trimmed beard suggesting recent grooming. Standing beside him was a figure who exuded an otherworldly aura, his piercing blue eyes unsettling and filled with an uncanny intensity. With a formal gesture, he crossed his arms, revealing intricate dragon tattoos that seemed to shimmer with an ethereal glow, mirroring the luminance of his gaze. Despite the chill in the air, there was an unexpected warmth in his smile as he uttered your first and last name, as if he had been anticipating your arrival.

You stood frozen, momentarily taken aback by the presence of the enigmatic figure before you. Tentatively, you ventured, “Lord Liu Kang?”

“Yes,” came the calm reply, confirming his identity. Despite his formidable stature and commanding presence, his voice carried a soothing timbre, putting you somewhat at ease. Strands of his long, obsidian hair were gathered in a half bun behind him, dressed in traditional Far Eastern attire, his hands were swathed in bandages, to his hand to elbow. It was surprising to see him in such ordinary garb, far removed from the divine image you had conjured in your mind. Yet, there was an undeniable aura of power and authority that emanated from him, accentuated by the eerie glow of his tattoos and the intensity of his gaze.

“Sektor has briefed me on the situation and the curse,” Liu Kang continued, taking a deliberate step forward. “May I have a word?”

As you silently nodded in agreement, Liu Kang motioned for you to follow him, leaving Sektor behind as the two of you made your way to a more secluded area, away from the crowd.

“Do you know how to break Quan Chi’s curse?” you voiced the question that had been weighing heavily on your mind since you first laid eyes on him. As a god, you assumed he held the answers to questions and problems that eluded mortals.

“It’s a curse I’ve encountered before,” he replied, his demeanor calm yet tinged with a hint of anger that simmered beneath the surface. “An ancient and demonic curse, leaving behind lasting damage, particularly to the mind. I am familiar with how to dispel such curses, but the solution is not one you will easily accept.”

“I want to save them.” Your voice suddenly became muffled, the tears that filled up as you thought about this situation and tried to hold them back, now that the three of them were not around, instantly began to flow down your cheeks. If you were a little embarrassed that you were crying in front of this man-god you never knew, the helplessness and grief you felt was even greater. “I can’t let them go back to the book again. What needs to be done to lift the curse? Please tell me, this has to stop.”

“You possess a pure heart,” The Fire God’s gaze fell upon you, a mix of sorrow and compassionate understanding that softened his features. “It has become increasingly rare to encounter individuals like you in this day and age… Black magic is inherently cruel, and so are its remedies,” he continued, his expression growing solemn. “There is only one method to lift the curse: the owner of the book must make a sacrificial offering of themselves.”

You fell into a stunned silence, grappling with the weight of his words as they reverberated in your mind. Your lips parted, but for a moment, it felt as though words had deserted you. Eventually, you managed to utter a whisper-like voice.

“So, what you’re saying is…”

“Death,” Liu Kang interjected sharply, his tone cutting through the air with finality. “This curse, rooted in ancient and potent sorcery, is designed by practitioners of black magic like Quan Chi to be unbreakable. The spell binds not only the cursed individuals but also the owner of the book, tethering your life energy to its pages until they return to its confines. Thus, any attempt to resist only serves to intensify the curse’s grip, compelling you to act against your will. The only path to freedom is through the ultimate sacrifice.”

Liu Kang’s gaze darkened with anger, a muscle twitching on his chin as his hands clenched into fists at his sides. His eyes, which seconds ago were warm and comforting, now blazed with righteous fury, their intensity piercing through the air like a searing flame.

“The curse is insidious,” he began, his voice laced with frustration. “It draws power from your life energy and intertwines it with their fate. As long as the owner of the book lives, the curse will persist. However,” he continued, his tone lowering to a solemn register, “if the owner willingly sacrifices their life, the curse will vanish along with the book, its source extinguished forever. It’s a trade-off, a cruel exchange that inevitably claims one side or the other. That’s the essence of black magic.”

You found yourself speechless, unable to even swallow past the lump in your throat. The gravity of Liu Kang’s words hung heavy in the air, casting a pall over your thoughts. Sacrifice your own life? The notion seemed incomprehensible, unfathomable, yet here it was, staring you in the face like an immutable truth carved in stone. With your family, dreams, and aspirations still within reach, could you bear to relinquish it all? Could you summon the courage to make such a sacrifice?

Strangely, these questions didn’t pierce your heart as much as the thought of never seeing all three of them again. Each day seemed more agonizing than the last, and you knew that the brave facade you wore didn’t fool anyone. Yet, you couldn’t bear the idea of burdening them with the curse’s weight and prompting them to take drastic action. You had found them too soon to lose them; the prospect losing them now felt unbearably cruel, like a dagger twisting in your soul. Their presence had became so integral to your life that you had actually forgotten what loneliness felt like.

You loved them, each with their own unique characteristics and qualities, with a possessive and fierce intensity unlike any love you had ever known. So when the answer came to you in a heartbeat, it didn’t scare you; instead, it settled on your shoulders like a comforting blanket, a peaceful weight that affirmed your resolve. Their needs, desires, and happiness were paramount to you, more precious than anything else in the world. As you reflected on the countless hardships they had endured, the thought of subjecting them to further suffering became unbearable. The power to end their torment lay within your grasp; you could not turn away from that responsibility. Though you couldn’t be with them in the way you longed for, you were determined to secure their well-being, even if it meant sacrificing your own life. They deserved nothing less than to reclaim the lives they had been denied for so long, to find happiness and peace in a world free from the curse’s grip.

“You don’t have to do this,” Liu Kang said, his voice soft yet filled with understanding.

“And shall I allow them to return to the book? No, I will never allow it,” you declared, your voice ringing with newfound determination. “I made a promise to them… My love for them eclipses all else, even my own life.”

Even as the curse neared its end, you couldn’t bear the thought of it being their final memory, tainted by your tears and suffering as each day brought more agony. You wanted to leave them with fond memories, to be remembered in a positive light. The idea of confessing your love to them seemed daunting until just ten minutes ago. Despite never feeling ready to bid them farewell, you knew it was inevitable.

“How am I to do it? With a knife?” you asked, your voice trembling with uncertainty. “I… I can’t take my own life. Will you help me?”

A myriad of emotions flickered across Liu Kang’s face, as if your question had unleashed a torrent of conflicting thoughts within him. You were taken aback by the sight of such ‘human’ emotions on the face of a god.

“I wish there were another way, one where you wouldn’t have to bear this burden alone,” Liu Kang sighed, his voice heavy with regret. “Bi-Han, Kuai Liang, and Tomas aren’t merely my chosen warriors; they’re also my friends—more than just allies. You are sacrificing yourself to save them; of course, I will assist you in any way I can.”

“And will you make it as painless as possible?” you asked, your voice tinged with a slight fear.

With a solemn nod, Liu Kang replied, “They will remember this act of immense bravery and courage for the rest of their lives. Your sacrifice, while saving them, will also haunt them forever.’’ You acknowledged it inwardly. Yet, the moment Liu Kang proposed the solution, your decision was made. You meant every word you said; they meant more to you than anything else, and you wanted them to reclaim the life that had been stolen from them. If sacrificing yourself was the path to ensure their freedom, then so be it.

“I want to bid them farewell,” you said, your gaze falling to the ground. “But the final act… I cannot bear to do it in front of them, especially Tomas. After what happened to his family, it would be too traumatic for him.”

‘’Of course,” Liu Kang replied, his voice filled with understanding. You gulped and lifted your gaze to the sky, silently observing the clusters of red clouds and the golden sun, its light waning as it prepared to set. The realization that this would be your final sunset weighed heavily on your chest, a palpable heaviness that seemed to anchor you to the ground. As you tried to swallow past the lump in your throat, a tear escaped, tracing a solitary path down your cheek. Your voice emerged hoarse, almost strained with emotion.

“I wish it hadn’t come to this. I would have cherished more moments with them.”

“Sometimes, even a god cannot interfere in the complex fabric of life,” Liu Kang said, tilting his head back to gaze at the sky alongside you. “Each thread is woven with its purpose and outcome. There are two paths before you, and the latter entails your choice to end your life. While I respect your decision, I must ask one last time: are you certain about this?”

As Liu Kang’s luminous blue eyes bore into yours, a sense of calm washed over you, a tranquility that spoke of acceptance and resolve.

“More than anything.”

***

As you returned home, it felt as though your body no longer belonged to you. You couldn’t recall how you had made the journey back; it was as if you had been moving through molasses, each step slow and heavy. Though your surroundings appeared blurred, your thoughts remained clear, cocooning you in a blanket of comfort and unwavering determination.

Upon softly opening the door, the scene that greeted you shattered what little remained of your heart. Bi-Han occupied the single seat he always favored, gently stroking Ninja’s head as the cat slept soundly in his lap. A rare, tender smile graced his lips, a sight that had become increasingly frequent in recent days. Meanwhile, Kuai Liang and Tomas sat cross-legged, engrossed in something on your laptop, their occasional laughter filling the room with warmth and joy. The serene atmosphere tugged at your heartstrings, leaving you both comforted and conflicted. How could you possibly break the news of your decision to them?

Caught in a state of frozen uncertainty, it was Kuai Liang who first noticed your presence. His expression of happiness dissolved into pure astonishment at the sight of Fire God and Sektor standing behind you.

“Lord Liu Kang?” he exclaimed, disbelief evident in his voice. As his words hung in the air, the rest of the brothers turned their heads towards the entrance, mirroring Kuai Liang’s surprise. They remained rooted in place for a few seconds before Bi-Han took decisive action. Carefully lowering Ninja to the ground, he strode forward to stand before Liu Kang, bowing his head respectfully in greeting.

“Lord Liu Kang.” Bi-Han uttered, his tone a mixture of reverence and warmth.

Liu Kang’s gentle smile widened as he placed both hands on Bi-Han’s shoulders, lifting him upright. “Bi-Han, it has indeed been a long time,” he acknowledged. His glowing eyes shifted to encompass Tomas and Kuai Liang, who had gathered behind Bi-Han. “It is truly a pleasure to see the warriors of the Lin Kuei, defenders of Earthrealm, and my friends once again.”

“The pleasure is ours,” Kuai Liang replied, his voice infused with warmth and sincerity as Bi-Han’s. They all expressed their respect and embraced each other in a brotherly hug, a sight that surprised you, especially seeing a god joining in. Engaging in small talk, their camaraderie was palpable. Bi-Han’s gaze then shifted towards Sektor, who stood silently beside you. His brow furrowed slightly, silently questioning his right-hand man.

“Sektor? You didn’t come all the way here just to show Lord Liu Kang, did you? It’s still more than a week until you’re supposed to take the book.”

Sektor didn’t answer, instead, when he gave you an evasive glance, Bi-Han instantly caught his gaze and his expression hardened. As he crossed his arms on both sides, the cold waves of air that began to spread over him tingled your skin.

‘’What’s going on?’’

‘’Bi-Han,” you interjected in a gentle, strained voice, struggling to suppress your emotions while the curse writhed inside you more cruelly than ever. The pain surged higher and more severe than you were accustomed to, causing your knees to momentarily tremble. Bi-Han easily grabbed you by the waist and pulled you to himself, his expression shifting from one of composure to one of anxious concern in an instant, causing your heart to flutter. Knowing how strict he was with himself about showing his feelings compared to his brothers, it filled you with happiness to see how much he had progressed in such a short period of time. It was the greatest proof of the depth of his feelings for you. Bi-Han was a stoic man, never one to show vulnerability. Seeing him like this now was both heartwarming and overwhelming. He was laying himself bare before you, offering his feelings on a platter, and you realized you could easily hurt him if you chose to, because he was showing you his vulnerability so openly.

“Are you all right?” Bi-Han’s hand gently cupped your face, his calloused fingers stroking your cheek. “Did you cry?”

At his question, Tomas and Kuai Liang turned their gaze toward you. You quickly composed yourself, the callouses on his hand providing a comforting touch against your skin. With a slight tremble in your voice, you managed a reassuring smile, your eyes reflecting a mixture of gratitude and sadness. You wanted to remain strong until the very end, to etch a lasting impression in their minds.

“I’m fine,” you replied, your voice surprisingly calm despite the turmoil within. You savored Bi-Han’s protective touch, the coolness of his skin a stark contrast to the warmth of his presence. The scent of cold and fresh snow emanating from him filled your senses, your fingers traced the contours of his strong features lovingly, committing each curve to memory. A lump formed in your throat, making it hard to swallow, as you fought back tears that threatened to spill over. Gently winding the few remaining tufts of his black hair into a small bun, you planted a tender kiss on his pale lips, conveying all your emotions in that fleeting moment. Stepping back, you caressed his cheek one last time, the rough texture of his short stubble a familiar sensation against your fingertips. Bi-Han’s expression grew increasingly worried, his furrowed eyebrows revealing his confusion as he searched your eyes for answers.

However, instead of offering an explanation, you gently slipped out of Bi-Han’s grasp and made your way to Kuai Liang, who stood beside him.

“What’s going on? Why are you acting like this?” Kuai Liang’s voice was laced with concern as he carefully cupped your face with both hands, his thumbs stroking your skin. You responded with a soft smile, kissing one of his palms before silencing him by placing your finger on his lips. His brow furrowed in confusion, the joy from moments ago fading from his face. You felt a pang of guilt for dampening his spirits, but you knew that everything you were about to do was for their well-being. They would no longer suffer, be exploited, or have their consent disregarded. They would reclaim their dignified lives, where they rightfully belonged.

As Kuai Liang fell silent, you withdrew your hand, savoring the warmth emanating from his body for what would be the last time. Despite his formidable appearance, he exuded a comforting aura, his skin radiating health, his stance unwavering. The faint scent of ash, a remnant of his pyromancy, mingled with the aroma of cedar reminiscent of summer nights, enveloping his bronze-toned physique. His amber-brown eyes, usually filled with determination, now held a soft, worried gaze as they met yours.

Struggling to maintain your smile, you rose onto tiptoe and pressed a gentle kiss to Kuai Liang’s lips. “It will be all right.” you assured him, though your voice faltered toward the end. Blinking back tears that threatened to cloud your vision, you swiftly moved to Tomas’s side before Kuai Liang could reach out to you once more.

There was an obvious panic on Tomas’s young face as he scrutinized you from head to toe with his gray eyes. You felt a pang of guilt for causing such distress. Though you kept your shoulders straight, reminding yourself of your purpose, and tried to maintain a smile, tears welled up in your eyes again when Tomas uttered your name in desperation. Instantly, you enveloped him in a tight hug.

“Talk to us, what’s going on? Did someone hurt you? Just give us their names,” Tomas pleaded, his muscular arms circling you protectively, as if he wanted to shield you from everything, even though you were the one who wanted to do the same for him.

You shook your head in response, planting a kiss on Tomas’s cheek. The faint scent of embers lingered around him, reminiscent of burning wood. Whether from his smoke magic or not, the smell defined Tomas—wild and free. Despite his formidable abilities as an assassin, his naive trust in you was evident. Stepping back, you met his gaze, his gray eyes almost appearing blue in the light. Though he possessed frightening strength and abilities, the vulnerability in his eyes told a different story. Swallowing back your emotions, you resolved that he wouldn’t suffer from the curse’s torment any longer.

You remembered how Tomas had reacted when the power went out a few days ago—it was as if everything had been reset that evening, despite the progress he had made since leaving the book.

“Tomas, it’s okay. You’re safe. You’re not in the book; look, I’m here. Your brothers are also here,” you reassured him, trying to calm his frantic state.

Thanks to the small fireball Kuai Liang created in his hands, Tomas became clearly visible. The silver-haired assassin stood frozen, breathing heavily, fists clenched, his gaze darting around erratically. Sweat matted his short hair against his forehead, glinting in the dim light of the room.

“Tomas,” you called softly again, reaching out to him, but Bi-Han stopped you, gripping your wrist firmly.

“He might hurt you,” Bi-Han warned, his voice harsh and protective. “He’s out of his mind right now, more like a cornered animal than a human being.”

“He’s just scared, that’s all,” you countered, disregarding Bi-Han’s warning. Carefully, you approached Tomas, making sure not to startle him further. “Tomas? Let me touch you, let me show you that you’re not there anymore.”

As you raised your hand to touch him, Tomas’s gaze fixed on you, his jaw clenched tightly. An angry, almost aggressive snarl escaped his lips. Bi-Han and Kuai Liang moved to protect you, but you signaled for them to stay put. Sudden movements and sounds would only agitate Tomas further.

“You’re not there, Tomas. It’s been two months since you came out of the book. You’re in my house, next to me. Look,” you reassured him, your hand gently touching his cheek. Tomas flinched violently, but he didn’t lash out. Though he remained as still as a statue, his gaze shifted to focus on you.

“You don’t want to scare Ninja anymore, do you?” you continued, noticing a slight softening in Tomas’s expression. A low, plaintive sound escaped his throat, resembling the whimper of a wounded animal. “Shh, everything is fine. I know, I know. Come, let me hug you.”

Gathering courage from his stillness, you wrapped your arms around him. Tomas melted into the embrace, his grip tightening around you as he took a sharp breath. Despite the pressure from his strong frame, you made no sound, understanding his need for this connection. As Tomas whispered your name like a prayer, your heart swelled with love and pain, wishing you could heal the wounds inflicted on his soul by the curse.

Your hand found the short tufts of gray hair, stroking them lovingly as you planted a kiss first on his cheek and then on his forehead. “I’m here. It’s all right, you’re safe, Tomas.”

And now you had the power to break this curse.

“You frighten me,” Tomas’s voice interrupted your thoughts, drawing your attention. His words echoed the fear and confusion swirling within you, amplifying the emotional turmoil.

You fought to maintain the dwindling smile on your face as you leaned in to kiss Tomas goodbye on the lips. Every touch, every gesture, was imbued with a depth of feeling that words could not fully express. It was a bittersweet farewell, filled with love and longing. Then, you turned to look at Kuai Liang and Bi-Han, their expressions clouded with concern.

“I love all three of you,” you whispered, the words heavy with emotion. For days, you grappled with how to express this overwhelming feeling, the realization that they had become the foundation of your world, each one holding a profound significance in your heart. The mere thought of voicing these sentiments once filled you with breathless anticipation, but now, as the words escaped your lips, they carried a weight you couldn’t bear alone. Indeed, the pain of the curse paled in comparison to the heaviness in your heart. “Please don’t be angry with anyone, okay?”

“Why are you saying these things?” Bi-Han’s voice cut through the air like shards of ice, his tone rigid and unyielding. Understanding his reaction became easier as you got to know him. He tended to become aggressive when he didn’t want to show his emotions – especially when panicked or afraid. This was one of those moments.

“To whom, why should we be angry?” Tomas’s voice conveyed his confusion. His genuine perplexity only served to deepen the ache in your chest, reminding you of the innocence he still retained despite everything he had endured. You took a deep breath, after stroking Tomas’s cheek for the last time, you stepped back. However, Kuai Liang stopped you by grabbing your arm.

“Tell us what’s going on.” he demanded, his voice taking on a tone you had never heard before. It was the first time you heard him speak like this. Despite his usual warmth and politeness, even when discussing his past, his voice now turned cold, almost resembling that of his older brother, but never had it been this harsh and demanding.

“I will lift the curse,” you stated firmly, leaving no room for argument. “It’s my decision, so don’t hate me or anyone in this room for this, okay? I want what’s best for you.”

“Don’t we have a say in this? And how will you lift the curse?” Kuai Liang’s tone showed his displeasure. He shook you, and the words came out as a snarl. The fire burning in his eyes was evident, his touch alarmingly hot. But behind this intensity, the concern and fear he felt were clear in his expression, open and vulnerable. “Speak!”

“This is a farewell,” Bi-Han said in a single breath, his words cutting through the tension like a knife. “You are saying goodbye to us.”

“No!” Tomas, standing up to Kuai Liang, grabbed your other arm and turned you around to face him. “Tell me it’s a lie.”

You swallowed hard. As your composure, which you tried to maintain, slowly crumbled, your lower lip trembled, and tears flowed freely. An expression of denial appeared on the faces of the three of them, indicating their refusal to accept what was about to happen.

“I’d love to,” you responded to Tomas. “But Bi-Han is telling the truth.” After inhaling deeply, you squared your shoulders and fought back the tears. “I love all three of you very much. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you. I made a promise, and I will keep it. I will set you free.”

“How?!” Bi-Han appeared in front of you with a roar, gripping your chin and forcing you to meet his furious gaze. “Whatever sacrifice you’re considering, I won’t allow it. Do you hear me?! You’re not doing anything! We will find another solution.”

“There is no other solution,” you said tearfully, freeing yourself from his grip and placing your hand on his. “I can’t set you free any other way, Bi-Han.”

“No. I said no damnit!” Bi-Han’s voice was adamant. “You stubborn woman, listen to me; I won’t allow it.”

“I’m so sorry,” you said, your voice trembling. “I wish there was another way, but it’s the only way, and I’m ready to fulfill it gladly. I’m not going to let you stop this.” You glanced over your shoulder at Liu Kang. The Fire God watched in silence, his gaze betraying a mix of sadness and anger at the injustice of the situation. “I am ready.”

As Liu Kang nodded his approval, an aggressive growl rumbled from Bi-Han’s throat, his dark, furious gaze fixed on Liu Kang now. Layers of frost and sharp ice began to grow on his skin, a chilling armor of determination as he prepared to confront a god to protect you. It was evident that while they respected Liu Kang deeply, you held an even greater significance to them in that moment, compelling them to face him in order to shield you from harm.

“Don’t you fucking dare. Don’t come close—” he warned, his voice carrying the weight of finality.

“I have the utmost respect for you, Lord Liu Kang, but if you take one more step, I will have to attack you.” Tomas’s voice pierced the tense air, devoid of its usual warmth, cold and chillingly clear. His bright eyes, once filled with warmth, now darkened and focused with an intensity that chilled you more than Bi-Han’s powers.

Aware that what you were about to do would haunt you forever, you steeled yourself. Despite the weight of your decision, there was no other choice. Your sole aim was to bring an end to this ordeal swiftly and without further harm. The thought of anyone else being affected by the curse was unbearable.

“Nobody’s going to do anything,” you said, turning your gaze away from Bi-Han and fixing it on the wall behind him. You couldn’t bear to meet their eyes. “I order all three of you to remain in your places and not to move.”

Your command hung in the air, heavy and tense. A suffocating silence descended upon the room, broken only by the sound of their ragged breaths. This was the first and last time you’d give them orders. It was for their sake, but it didn’t ease the guilt gnawing at you. You’d betrayed their trust. A few more tears escaped down your cheeks as you walked towards the book on the kitchen counter, still avoiding their gazes. You easily slipped out of Bi-Han’s loosening grip, determined to see this through to the end.

As you mentally prepared to pick up the book and materialize into the Fire Temple, it remained stubbornly unmoved. Furrowing your eyebrows, you tried to lift it with both hands, but it felt as if the book weighed a ton. A searing heat radiated from your fingertips to your hand, threatening to melt your skin and expose your bones if you held on any longer. With a small whimper, you pulled your hands back, and Liu Kang came into view.

“The curse knows what you’re about to do, that’s why it won’t let the book move.” He explained.

“But… if we can’t take it with us—then…” you trailed off, a sense of helplessness washing over you.

“Yes,” Liu Kang replied in a carefully flat voice.

“I don’t want them to witness this,” you said, your eyes flickering to the three men you held dear. Their faces revealed a tumult of emotions—betrayal, concern, and fear all intertwined. Despite their futile attempts to defy your command and approach, their efforts proved fruitless. Veins protruded on their skin, and deep furrows etched across their foreheads, with Tomas even beginning to bleed from his nose. Knowing there was no alternative, you fought back a fresh wave of tears, though they continued to betray your resolve. “All right,” you sniffed, quickly dabbing your eyes to dry the tears, lifting your chin to meet Liu Kang’s gaze once more. “Do it quickly, please.”

“Liu Kang!” Kuai Liang shouted, trying to launch the fireballs that appeared in both his hands but failing because of some kind of invisible wall that forced him to stay still. “Don’t you dare hurt her!”

“Get away from her!” Bi-Han said furiously. “I swear, if you touch her, I’ll fucking kill you!”

“No, you won’t hurt him.” In as soft a voice as possible, the second command poured from your lips. “This is my last plea to you, please don’t hurt anyone.” Your gaze turned to Sektor, who caught your wordless request. With silent steps, his head tilted to the ground, he approached, took out the hunting knife from the scabbard at his waist, and handed it to Liu Kang.

“No!” Tomas struggled on the spot, shouting, trying every way to break free from the order that was suppressing him. It destroyed you to feel the desperation in his voice. “No, Sektor, stop! Lord Liu Kang, don’t do this. Please!”

“Place your hand on the book. I know it will hurt you, but I will make it as quick and light as possible,” Liu Kang said, falling deaf to the screams behind him. However, there was a weight in his voice that made him seem more mature than he was. You did what he said, taking strength from the gentle expression on his face to keep you calm. A sizzle rose up in your flesh. You bit your lower lip and held yourself back from squealing in pain. You were going to handle this quietly; you were going to stand strong for them.

‘’Repeat after me: as the keeper of this book, I offer a pact. I unbind Bi-Han, Kuai Liang, and Tomas from the Lin Kuei Clan, the chains that tether them to this book, in exchange for the sacrifice of my own life. From this moment onward, they shall walk free from this curse. My blood and my life shall seal these words.’’

After you echoed his words, despite the screams and chaos around you, Liu Kang delivered the first stab with the knife from Sektor. When the blade pierced under your ribs, you gasped sharply. The pain was more sudden and searing than you had anticipated. Your balance wavered, and the burning pain in your hand seemed insignificant compared to the deep cut now bleeding beneath your ribs. As your misty gaze fell on the book under your hand, you saw the length of the cut forming there.

“Stop! By the elder gods, please stop! Bi-Han, brother, stop them!” Tomas’s desperate cries rang in your ears. Turning your head to him, you murmured in a voice hoping to comfort him.

“It doesn’t hurt, I swear.” Tomas’s expression shattered, his gray eyes shining with unshed tears, making him look younger and more vulnerable than ever. “It’s okay, everything will be okay.”

When Liu Kang raised his hand for the second blow, you closed your eyes. At that moment, Bi-Han’s furious, despairing voice cut through the air, filled with deadly determination.

“Liu Kang, she’s innocent! Stop it now, or I swear to you—No!” Bi-Han’s voice rang out as the knife plunged into your stomach. Your knees buckled, and you collapsed to the ground, but you kept your hand on the book despite the pain. Your hand went numb, whether from the pain or from the nerves being destroyed, you couldn’t tell. Everything had become a big ball of agony. The metallic taste of blood rose in your throat, filling your mouth. You coughed to avoid choking, and blood splattered around, some of it flowing down your lips.

‘’It’s okay… It… Doesn’t hurt.’’ You managed to murmur, the words feeling foreign on your tongue. Your lips felt numb, as if disconnected from your voice, and your tongue seemed to weigh heavy in your mouth.

“Don’t lift the curse, stop!” Kuai Liang’s cries were muffled by the pounding in your ears. Everything around you blurred into a chaotic whirl of colors and sounds, like trying to focus underwater. Each breath was a struggle, a battle against an unseen weight pressing down on your chest. Despite the pain, you clung to consciousness, fighting to stay present amidst the overwhelming haze of approaching death. “Don’t take her away from us. Please, Liu Kang, stop this madness! Let the curse stay, we want it back. Give it back—Just stop!’’

Liu Kang didn’t stop. As he lowered the knife for the third time, aiming for your heart, you felt a deep slit open in the cover of the book under your hand. Despite the excruciating pain, a weak smile formed on your face as you realized the curse had finally been lifted. It was over. They were free now. You could feel the pressure of the curse lifting, and you knew they must have felt it too. As blood continued to rise from your throat, flowing relentlessly from your lips like a crimson cascade, Liu Kang hesitated before withdrawing the knife, gently lowering you to the ground. Numbness crept through your body like tendrils of frost, slowly engulfing your senses. The pain, once sharp and all-consuming, now ebbed away like a receding tide, leaving behind a dull ache. As your vision blurred and darkness encroached, you could barely discern the outlines of three figures, their forms wavering like shadows in the fading light.

You tried to talk. To say that it doesn’t hurt, you’re glad that you finally lifted the curse and set them free, to say that you loved them with all of your heart even words cannot describe how you felt for them. But the words tumbled meaninglessly from your lips, your tongue felt too heavy and it became increasingly difficult to breathe.

“Shhh, don’t talk. We will save you, qīn’ài. Everything’s going to be fine.”

You felt a hand on top of your head, the gentle caress tracing soothing circles. It was Kuai Liang, you surmised from the familiar touch. His fingers moved with care, each stroke bringing a fleeting warmth that chased away a fraction of the cold surrounding you. Then, a sudden pressure on your wounds jolted you, eliciting a sharp whimper that escaped your lips.

‘’You foolish, stubborn woman! We won’t let you go, did you hear me? Don’t you dare give up on us now. I’ll make your life hell after the act you pulled.”

Bi-Han’s words echoed in your ears. Despite the harshness of his tone, you detected the underlying concern beneath his façade, acknowledging the conflict in his emotions. Each breath became more labored, and you wished desperately to convey your remorse to them. But deep down, you knew that if faced with the same choice again, you would make it without hesitation. Because your love for them outweighed everything else. Yet, as another cough wracked your body, you realized that words were futile. Numbness enveloped you completely, and the chill in the air seeped into your bones, causing you to shiver uncontrollably. You surrendered to the encroaching darkness, unable to resist its pull.

Your heart beat weakly one last time, then stopped completely.

***

Author’s Note: My apologies for the cliffhanger! But I’ve already started writing the next chapter, so you won’t have to wait too long again unless something important comes up. Also, I’ve decided to turn this into a series, as I have a couple of ideas brewing. If you have any suggestions or ideas, feel free to share them with me on my blog. If I find them interesting or relevant to the story, I’ll incorporate them into it and give you credit.✨

[decagondice]

༓ Astra's Dark Bargain ༓

༓ Pairing. Zayne x Reader

༓ Synopsis. In a desolate, snow-covered mountain pass, Zayne kneels beside the still form of the one person he had vowed to protect, grappling with the weight of his failure and the relentless demands of Astra, a deity whose cruelty haunts his every step. As the frost of Astra’s displeasure creeps across his own skin, Zayne finds himself confronting the quiet, somber ache of a love lost to forces beyond mortal control. His voice is a quiet plea to the uncaring heavens, a whispered promise to carry the burden left in your wake, and to defy the god’s merciless hold—even if it means bearing Astra’s frost alone in the empty silence.

༓ Content. sfw, I've mixed both of foreseer and regular zayne into this one, it's hard to describe Zayne here... Zayne and reader in an alternate life you might say, Angst (?) no comfort, Emotional distress, Loneliness, Resentment, Mentions of death, Hurt, Mentions of pain, Zayne's woes, Not proofread.

༓ Word Count. 1.3k

༓ A.N. Bargain doesn't even read legibly on the cover image -_- But! I wanted to write a slightly dramatic piece about Zayne and this is what I could conjure up...I hope to come up with more ideas for him and the other characters in the future, as they often occupy my thoughts. I am not sure how I feel about this piece (again…) but I just wanted to test the waters to see if I could write for any of the L&DS men :)

[Artwork by Arkhip Kuindzhi - 'Elbrus. Moonlit Night', 1895]

The snow fell in a gentle, unbroken drift across the desolate mountainside, casting the world in a pale, unyielding silence. Zayne knelt in its midst, his breath misting in thin clouds before him, his body still but his mind filled with restless echoes. Beneath him, a thin sheet of frost began to form along the edges of his hands, creeping across his skin as he held still, resisting the hollow summons of Astra’s will. He could feel it—Astra’s cold displeasure, sinking into his bones, a reminder of the god’s claim upon him, of the obedience expected.

But his focus, his thoughts, lay with you.

His gaze traced the jagged peaks rising around him, black shadows against the whiteness of the sky, as if the mountains themselves bore witness to his failure. The snow lay untouched, pristine, save for the faint indentations left by his knees and the faint outlines of where you lay beside him. Zayne closed his eyes, breathing in the frigid air, letting it scrape against his lungs, sharp and raw, as if it might somehow mirror the feeling within him.

When he finally spoke, his voice was a quiet murmur, almost lost in the vastness. “You once told me,” he began, his words nearly inaudible, “that if anything ever happened, you trusted me to keep you safe. You believed in me, even when I faltered.” He lowered his gaze to the snow-covered ground, to the faint outline of your form, unmoving. “I wanted so much to protect you from all of this…from him. From the fate he had written for us.”

He reached out, his hand hovering just above you, close enough to feel the bitter cold radiating from your skin. Astra’s frost was already settling there, weaving a cruel web of ice and decay, a visible reminder of Zayne’s defiance, of his quiet refusal to yield fully to the god’s demands. The frost had become Astra’s punishment, each crystal a reminder of his supposed disloyalty, a testament to his human weakness.

Zayne took in a slow, ragged breath, and his fingertips trembled, holding back the impulse to touch you, to draw you close. He knew he couldn’t; the frost would spread, seeping from him to you, an insidious reminder of Astra’s power, and he couldn’t bear to add to your suffering, even in this silence.

“Astra,” he murmured, slowly looking up to the bleak, slate-grey sky. “If this is your design, then why must I be forced to bear it like this?” He could feel the ache of his words in his throat, the raw sorrow pressing down on him, heavy as the snow that fell, cold and unfeeling. “What purpose is there in this silence, in this…punishment?” He let his hand fall away, fingers digging into the snow, as if the sting of cold could numb the helplessness clawing within him.

The silence held his answer. Astra’s presence loomed, distant and implacable, as cold as the landscape around him. Zayne had spent years under that shadow, bound by threads of fate that he had never chosen, threads that tightened around him with every passing moment, reminding him that his defiance was futile. And yet, he had never truly surrendered, not in his heart. Not with you beside him.

The snow began to settle more heavily, blanketing the desolation around him in a shroud of quiet, oppressive white. Every breath Zayne drew tasted of cold metal, of something bitter and unforgiving, and he could feel his strength waning under the weight of the knowledge pressing down on him: he’d failed. This time, he hadn’t been able to shield you from Astra’s wrath, from the god’s harsh and unbending will. This time, the nightmares he had fought so hard to keep from you had spilled into the waking world, and he had been powerless to stop them.

He looked down, his eyes tracing the delicate lattice of frost spreading along your skin, tracing lines that seemed cruelly beautiful in the way they marred the familiar warmth he’d cherished. His voice softened, barely a whisper. “I never wanted this to be your burden,” he murmured. “I wanted to be enough, somehow…enough to keep you safe, to carry the weight of it myself.” He felt the ache of unspoken words, the memory of countless promises he’d made to himself to protect you, to give you shelter from Astra’s storms, no matter what price he had to pay.

But Astra’s price had been exacted nonetheless, claimed in silence and shadow, leaving only emptiness in its wake. Zayne’s jaw tightened, the grief pressing harder, sharper, as he forced himself to look upon the frost-laced contours of your face. How many nights had he watched over you, guarding you from the dark, from the nightmares he carried in his own soul? How many times had he whispered quiet reassurances, promising a safety he was never certain he could give?

And now…now that safety was as distant and unreachable as the stars that hid behind the grey sky.

He let the silence stretch, feeling its weight, listening to the quiet crush of snow beneath his fingers as he shifted closer, unwilling to leave your side even as Astra’s frost continued its cruel work. “You believed in me,” he murmured, more to himself than to the god whose shadow lingered over him. “Even when I questioned myself. You had faith that I could keep you from this fate, that I could somehow outwit a god’s will.”

He shook his head slowly, a faint, sorrowful smile ghosting over his lips. “Maybe that was your kindness…believing in me like that, letting me think I could protect you from him.” His voice softened, breaking. “But even kindness has its limits, doesn’t it?”

The snow fell thicker now, beginning to blur the line between earth and sky, erasing the distinctions between each jagged peak and hollowed valley. Zayne could feel the stillness settling over everything, blanketing him in an almost unbearable quiet, as if even the mountains shared in his grief. His hand drifted to his chest, resting over his heart, as if trying to hold onto the warmth that was slowly leeching away in Astra’s icy wake.

He closed his eyes, letting the memories fill the silence—the warmth of your laughter echoing against stone, the way your hand had slipped into his with quiet confidence, as if the gods’ wrath could never touch you so long as you stood beside him. He’d found himself believing it, if only for a moment, forgetting that Astra’s shadow could reach anywhere, even here in the desolation, even here in his arms.

Zayne’s shoulders fell, the weight of the silence pressing in. He looked to the mountains, their impassive faces cloaked in snow and shadow, and he spoke once more, a faint whisper of resolve threaded through his voice.

“Astra may hold my fate in his hands,” he said softly. “He may demand penance, loyalty, whatever else he wills.” His fingers brushed the cold ground beside you, almost tender, but he did not dare disturb the stillness that bound you now. “Some things will always remain beyond his reach—even for him.” His hand pressed to his heart, the only warmth left in the unforgiving chill.

In the solitude of the mountain, with only the wind and snow as witness, Zayne leaned down, his forehead nearly touching the frost that laced your own, his breath ghosting across your brow. “Rest now,” he whispered, the words barely breaking past his grief. “What you leave behind, I'll bear.”

And as he knelt there, alone in the unyielding cold, he felt the frost sink deeper into his skin, creeping in warning, as if Astra’s hold tightened with each moment he lingered by your side. But Zayne stayed, unwavering, unwilling to surrender his last moments with you, no matter the price.

Snow covered you both as the mountains stood silent, unmoved, keeping watch over the broken vow that lay quietly between you.

A.N. I was researching a bit about Astra when writing this piece and his theories seem...interesting.... I do want to write something about astra but I'm not too sure since he is still a shrouded figure. Anyways~ I hope you enjoyed this piece! Thank you for reading! Have a lovely day/night:)