#its kind of funny 2 me that i so rarely end up playing men

[gilfrespecter]

fun sketchbook page from yesterday ft patty who was originally made for sw deadlands and is now a teen with issues for a wod/hunter campagin and my first try making a brush based off my beloved g2 pilot 0.38

[yj-98]

my brain is perpetually melting lately so im like not super comprehending it but i looove hearing ppl talk about what theyre into and i am just nodding along so enthusiastically when you talk about rdr2 . also take this as me asking about it as i said im nodding along

crow im sorry </3 honestly i understand 100% and i hope the brain fog lifts for you<3 but im happy its fun to hear about <3 thank you for nodding along and asking about it (in spirit) so let me lay the generic history + synopsis of both games because i have . sort of just been dropping context as i talk about two brothers and their horrible father (<3 and the good one)

anyways im about to be very autistic<3 buckle up

red dead redemption (2010) started off as a spiritual successor to a game called red dead revolver (2004) that rockstar bought after the game had been cancelled after it failed to follow thru with funding issues in 2000 (capcom. as in mega man capcom, was paying for a studio to make it, but funding dropped and and that studio closed so rockstar acquired the studio + eventually got the rights for rthe game). HOWEVER they wanted to do more w/ the concept

so john martson was born in 2010 w/ the first red dead game. youre introduced to a this former outlaw in 1911 who's family is being used for blackmail as he makes his way across a fictionalized version of the american south/west + mexico trying to track down his former friends because the US govt wants them dead. hes polite but no-nonsense and hes sarcastic sometimes and mentally unwell and also so kind. hes very funny honestly like rdr1 john my beloved. and he helps people along the way! he makes associates with all kinds of people. he deals with the people in his old gang (javier escuella and bill williamson), including his father figure dutch van der linde. hes described as his fathers greatest success and greatest downfall. hes returned to his wife and son and 'uncle' only for the US govt to raid their home, kill uncle, and it forces john to tell his wife and son to run while he makes a last stand, knowing that theyd stop at killing him. because ultimately these games are about redemption. and it almost succeeds, but his son grows up to avenge him

and its a fun game! its a wonderful story its really well done with interesting twists and turns and a HEARTBREAKING ending with this kid just. continuing that cycle. killing a government man puts a target on his head too. and rockstar couldve gone with a sort of . 1910s-1920s set sequel where you explore what the kids fate is. instead in 2018 we're given a prequel in the form of red dead redemption 2.

its 1899 and its the end of the golden age and the age of the "west" is honestly decades gone. dutch is clinging to an old life because he hates the US government, doesnt trust the law, etc. hes got a group of misfits including two men hes raised since they were preteens (arthur morgan + john marston) alongside his oldest friend (platonic life partner? sorry. theyre toxic old men* in love) hosea matthews.

(*old for 1899)

so arthur morgan is born in 2018. hes not mentioned once in rdr1 because he didnt exist! and rockstar gives themself the very hard job of making us LIKE a protagonist new to the story as a whole. and it works basically immediately. id argue its almost impossible to hate arthur when he feels so human. ive rarely like. played a game that beat for beat feels very much like reading a novel and i am. so honest when i say he feels human. they all do. but you hear his thoughts, you read his journal entries, you hear his comments to himself and his way of interacting with the world around you, let alone with other people. hes so endearing, if not a bit gruff and rough around the edges, and then he warms. especially around hosea, or in quiet moments with john or his friendship that blooms w/ a man named charles (i will not get into this.) or his kindness with sadie adler, a widow you meet in the prologue (shes sooo).

and then arthur starts dying. hes dying from the end of chapter 2. theres 6 chapters total + two epilogues w/ john. chapter 1 is essentially the prologue. youre given ONE whole chapter with arthur before It Happens. and hes declining. and you get hints. he starts coughing.

rdr2 is a story of arthur and the events that lead to rdr1 with a splintered family. you know the events of rdr1 will happen as absolutes: bill dies. javier dies. dutch dies. john and abigail (his wife) will die. jack, their son, who in rdr2 is maybe all of 5 years old, will one day kill a man. but that seems so distant

its a death march, its an avalanche, its a butterfly effect. its a car crash its a trainwreck. and youre a rubbernecker. you cant look away, you have to play his part in the play. the events that ultimately are the catalyst happen a month prior to the games opening: dutch picked up a man named micah bell, and micah is not a nice man. and he knows exactly how to play dutch like a fiddle. and dutch's ego is too big to know hes being played. they rob a ferry boat. it goes badly. people die. the pinkertons are after them all. they run into the mountains and almost die. dutch's ego is bruised and he Needs to correct it. they run into his old nemesis and they steal that guys plans to rob a train. you could say that this was the true catalyst for the events for the rest of the game but ultimately it doesnt matter. micah has his grip on dutch, and dutch just robbed one of thee wealthiest men in america, who has an ego that matches

meanwhile arthur is an attack dog, and he attacks the wrong target on orders he doesnt like. a weak man dying of tuberculosis. it infects arthur, unwittingly. arthur can quit these jobs. its doesnt matter. he will die in 6 months

rdr2 is a story of trying desperately to pump the breaks as more and more people die. its about hope and trying to save as many people as you can. its about people who fall through the cracks and who the 1% hate coming together and the reality of being used in a cult of personality. its about one man falling apart and taking 20+ people who looked to him like a shepherd, down with him. its about desperately clinging to the past as the future rockets forward. its about loyalty its about betrayal its about dying.

arthur is shown chapter after chapter as he gets weaker that his father is willing to let family die. that when dutch loses hosea in ANOTHER botched robbery he is not the same man. that he's willing to let both his sons die. and when arthur realizes his time left is short, hes desperate to make things right

arthur dies letting john escape. dutch and micah look down at him as hes dying and walk away. arthur is buried facing west. for the sun. john inherits his hat and journal. john tries to build that fateful home with abigail and jack. you spend the epilogue with him as he tries to make wrong puzzle pieces fit and shave down the parts of him that were his fathers son so that they can try to live normally. he succeeds. the epilogue lets you face micah and dutch as john and arthurs friends who survived (charles + sadie). you kill micah. he deserves it. dutch lets john live.

time does not stop. rdr1 looms ahead. you ignore this and play ranch simulator as john draws in arthurs journal and writes and scratches out words and draws hearts around his wifes name. you can find arthurs grave and sit with him.

i spent 1 month putting off arthurs death. i mourned him in real time when he died. games to CHANGE the brain chemistry

[croissantbae]

June 4, 2023

1.  Today was a wonderful Sunday (as usual).  We went to costco and Johnny asked if folks wanted to get lunch.  We all vacillated trying to choose options and ultimately ended up inviting people to our place.  Gave the kids miyukgook and ordered Bodega Park.  Then we all just hung out for hours talking while the kids played (and eventually fought /bickered lol.  That’s when you begin to know kids need naps / some space).  Jason planned a little gardening activity for the kids so that they could plant a seed.  It was really sweet/cute. 

2.  It’s happened.  After everyone left, Naya was just talking as Jason and I were cleaning, cooking.  And she says something about how someone killed someone on accident.  And I was like, wait naya say that again?  And she said that at school someone told her that someone had a gun and killed someone on accident.  I was like who told you that?  And she said her friend Sella (Sella is a little older than Naya and I noticed Sella has an older sister so I am guessing they are just actually conscious of that stuff).  I honestly wasn’t sure how to react.  And I said well, we don’t have any guns in this house so you don’t have to worry.  And Naya was like, yeah we don’t have guns in this world.  And I just repeated, we don’t have guns in this head (but thinking ugh. we have lots and lots of guns in this world).  Jason and I were kind of like uhhhhhh.  I think we really need to think about how we talk to our kids about this topic and other difficult topics like climate change, just death in general, violence, etc.  3 going on 4 and talking about gun violence. 

3.  I went to a mamamoo concert w/ my friend and coworker joan. And it honestly made me really glad that I went to a mamamoo concert specifically (over any other korean band).  Because I truly feel like they’re a little bit different and special.  I noticed there was a gay person sitting next to us and during the performance we saw that the rapper was getting a looooottt of love from the audience.  so as we were leaving my friend researched if moonbyul is gay and it seems like she is.  She seems to be pretty out (or I guess as out as you can be in Korea) and has a song out where it features two women lovers.  Anyway I just feel like their personalities are more unique.  Even like the light sticks that they passed out to everyone was a moo (radish), which was just funny to see everyone holding up a moo.  

My uber rides to and from were so weird.  On the car ride to meet Joan, the driver was talking about how he lives in Los Feliz and there are so many gay people in the area so he always warns his sons to be careful.  He was talking about it so much I started to feel like I was being punked.  And after watching Jury Duty I started to queston whether I was seriously being filmed and I was supposed to react.  He was talking about how they’d see two men walkign on the street with one walking the other with a collar around his neck, wearing hot pants.  I was like ....?? and then at a red light he showed me a pic of his 3 sons andI was like oh they’re beautiful.  and he was like yeah that’s why I have to tell them not to talk to strange men.  I was just like oh my god.... what is going on. 

Then on the uber ride home, the guy was kind of weird but I was like whatever.  Then he asked me how the concert was (I told him about it) and I said it was nice, I have two kids so its rare to be able to go to a concert but it was good.  and menitoned my husband is watching the kids.  and he was like oh yeah of course they’ll listen to him.  kids will listen to /obey men because they’re closer to god.  I was like uhhhh I’m not going to agree with that.  and he laughed.  and I was like because god is a female. and he was like haha why? I was like uhhh b/c life comes from women?  We give birth to life.  and he was like yeah but what’s the spark that creates that life? and i said just this teeny tiny thing.  and he was like oh come on.  and then he was saying kids will be loud and rambunctious and then when he comes into a room they’ll be quiet.  and its because men are close to god (like closer to the form of god I’m guessing).  and in my mind I was just like what you’re describing is fear and there’s a difference.  But didn’t say it because I was like my god just get me out of here. 

[atopearth]

Collar X Malice: Unlimited Part 7 - Adonis Route

Honestly, I find the way Ichika joined Zero's side to be pretty iffy even back then in the original game, so I kinda hoped something like Kazuki dying would have changed here but I guess not.. I feel sorry for Kazuki that they reconciled but she still ended up joining Adonis alongside Akito, it must be a pretty big shock having to deal with that. (EDIT: guess he is gone..) Ichika being at the top and training people in marksmanship and stuff is very interesting lol. She looks all right with short hair but yeah, I agree with Zero, I liked the long hair more. Anyway, Zero wants her to find out if there's a traitor amongst them before the next X-Day (since the one 2 years ago failed) in 30 days. Anyway, it seems like you go through each of the Adonis' executors' stories so that's interesting. I'm just going to go from the ones I least like to the ones I like the most haha, and then leave Mikuni for last I guess. Well, Hana's story first then~

Kobayashi Hana

I guess Hana is as bright as ever. I quite enjoy seeing her try and dress Ichika up and make her cuter lol. On the other hand, seeing her mercilessly cut through that panda cake was pretty hilarious. One thing I enjoyed insight into was hearing that Hana has been avoiding going to Isshiki's concerts to avoid causing any trouble to them with the police just in case they come to crash it because of her or something. Honestly, I was pretty impressed. Like, she's always been pretty selfish, and she's always prioritised her love for Isshiki above everything, but to see that she could stop herself to protect him was nice in its own way. Even though she's a pretty ruthless killer, and even though she's obsessed with Isshiki, I guess she does think things through a bit so that Isshiki won't ever have to suffer because of her. Hmm Ichika seemed to reminisce about Kazuki, does that mean he died? Anyway, these investigations are short? Are they really just segments of story for Ichika to become friends with each person? Lol. I mean, Ichika literally did nothing but talk about random stuff with Hana lol. I actually find it rather endearing that Hana and Ichika can fight so openly about their feelings and understand that they actually do want the best for each other, it's kinda nice how they became good friends under such circumstances.

Soda Manabu

Honestly, I kinda wish we could just pick one character and continue until the investigation completes because it's sooo annoying having to press on each one like 7 times just to get a couple of lines of story each time Zzz. Anyway, gotta admit Ichika is pretty judgmental towards Soda, and actively tries to "fix" him and thinks what he does is "wrong", which is pretty annoying tbh. Just because she doesn't understand games, she thinks it's useless to Adonis, and then judges him for his eating habits? Lol. Anyway, at least she tried playing his game though lol, and even got lessons from him haha. I see, I can understand why Ichika would go to Zero for "revenge" but not sure about the "sadness" thing if that's what she's going for tbh. Losing Yanagi, Enomoto, Shiraishi, Okazaki and Kazuki is a big hit and I can understand it shattering her world, but going to Adonis is basically breeding everything that killed everyone important to her. Anyway, Sasazuka's pained voice telling Ichika not to go to Adonis really hurt. I'm sure he's really hurting over the fact he didn't notice the weapons that ended up killing everyone, alongside survivor's guilt of being the only one who survived out of the group, and then now not even being able to stop Ichika from going over to the other side.. It's painful to see. Anyway, lmao, Soda is probably a tamer little brother than Kazuki. His words are harsh but you can tell he only talks like that to protect himself, so any time he swears, I don't bother taking him seriously, he's a hurt little kid. It's cute how Ichika mixed his hated eggplants into the gratin and he didn't even notice, but he ate the whole thing happily🤣 He's so adorable lmao, especially when his face went red and he told her he'd eat her stuff again (even though she shouldn't hear it), and then he ran off🤣

It seems like Soda regrets his actions much more than I initially thought. He was able to get revenge, but now he's even more scared of death because of what he had done, and now he's just in this never-ending cycle of fear, needing to have Zero's power to protect himself, doing his bidding so that he won't die, but at the same time being so scared of his life that the only time he probably feels "safe" is when he plays his games. I love how happy he was when Ichika gave him a SS tier rare item and he put it on, locked it and kept it in a special box🤣 That's so cuteee. Definitely enjoyed Soda's mini part more than I thought hahaha, he's such a cute little kid, which makes it kinda sad lol. Soda blowing up and getting mad at Ichika for playing solo and saying she didn't need connections when she made him realise he wanted to start building connections because of her was really...heartwarming. Soda gave up on people and a lot of things thinking that he could never have them because that's how it was considering how people are, but he changed his mind after Ichika so insistently barged into his life, and now to say that it's practically useless would be extremely hurtful to him. I was really impressed with Soda, and I'm happy that he even told Ichika that she can rely on him more, he's such a sweet boy🥲

Uno Suzune

Lmaooo poor Shion, the woes of a big brother. I found it hilarious how Suzune would give him the green peas she doesn't like even though Shion hates them too, definitely something siblings would do🥲 I superrrr agree with Suzune about handwriting diaries instead of writing a blog! I mean, I have both obviously, but I definitely have different feelings when I read my blog and when I read my writing in my diary. Through my blog, I can easily read my exact thoughts and get to the gist of what I'm talking about, but with my diary, I can see stuff like when I started getting tired of writing, when I felt like changing my pen, and a lot of other feelings that can't be seen or portrayed properly in a typed blog, and yes, the memories of me writing all this usually comes back better when I've written it, mainly because I either say it in the entry or because I can actually remember sitting there and putting time into writing about my life/day.

Guess Suzune's pretty yandere for her brother if any kind of possible romantic interest from Ichika gets her other self to come out and threaten her about it lol. Anyway, it's cute how she’s starting to kinda think of Ichika as a big sister. Suzune willingly taking Ichika to Shion and calling Ichika Chi-chan is probably the biggest improvement you can get considering she could stab you as the worst case hahha. Well, Suzune was definitely cuter than I thought and seeing her so vulnerable, shy but wanting to protect Shion and getting out of her shell for him was sweet. Are there endings for each executor? Well, anyway, Suzune saying she would be sad if anything happened to Ichika was really sweet.

Sugawara Rika

Lmao, I forgot Sugawara is obsessed with Zero, this is going to be fun I guess. It's kinda funny that getting a 50,000 yen strawberry entices her lol, I'm surprised Zero approved it as an expense, like dang, can I have one too, I'm curious lol. Lmao when Sugawara wanted to keep the strawberries as a memento instead of eating it😂 She should have been convinced when Ichika said it'll become a part of her hahahah. LOL when Sugawara started lecturing Ichika about dressing better in front of Zero, and then tried to get her makeup to make her look better, but then Ichika runs away😂

Okay, I loved the girls dress up night with Hana, Ichika and Sugawara. It was so funny how they started arguing about what Ichika should wear and then became fast enough friends to recommend each other stuff and then wear it for fun. I loveee that they had a CG for their new outfits because they're all so pretty, I love them! I think Hana's is my favourite because it's so simple but cute in a different way from her usual. I guess it's kinda cute how in Hana's investigation, Hana focuses on Ichika's clothing fashion, but Sugawara takes it further or I guess mainly focuses on skincare, makeup and haircare haha. I guess it's nice that Sugawara is definitely much more open about standing up for herself and other women when it comes to men who try to objectify them or think of them as "lesser". She's become stronger. I think it's kinda sad to see that amongst all the other happy mini endings with the other executors, Rika's one with Ichika is actually pretty sad because it was through them bonding that Rika noticed Ichika's true intentions of revenge, and that's why they can never truly see eye-to-eye and be friends.

Ogata Tomoki

I guess I didn't expect Ogata to be the type to go to batting cages, but I even more didn't expect him to reserve sweets to make sure he can get them hahaha! It's nice that he enjoys wagashi though, I definitely should have tried it when I went to Japan, but I completely forgot😭 Aww, Ogata had such a sweet daughter! Whenever his wife wasn't looking, she would eat his hated tomatoes for him! Such a kind kid😭 I've never heard of monaka before, so I googled it and they look nice!! Kinda like an ice cream sandwich but not with ice cream and has red bean paste and other stuff inside I guess? I would totally eat it. Lmaoo at Ichika's impression of the typical salaryman😂😂 It's true though, I can't imagine Ogata going home to watch comedy shows with a beer in his hand🤣 Aww it was so cute how Ogata did an impersonation of a character in a drama because he got so used to doing it for his daughter. But lmao at Ichika though, telling him what he can improve on since Adonis might have end of the year parties he could use it for, imagine a bunch of terrorists partying for something so normal like the end of the year hahah😂😂

It's actually really sad how Ogata feels like he can't be a father anymore because he knows that he prioritises his current ideals and dreams more than his daughter. And I guess considering how long they've been separated and how much he has changed, it would probably feel awkward to try and be a normal father, but I guess at least through Ichika's encouragement, he's willing to try and reply to his daughter's letter of wanting to meet him. I think the reason why I've always liked Ogata is because he doesn't regret his actions. Like, he knows that he's killed people and that's why he doesn't want to see his family and get them involved with what he's doing right now, because he knows the gravity of his actions. But at the same time, his hatred for Fujii, the police and the whole mistaken arrest that led to such injustice for him and changed his whole perspective on life is something he can't let go of, and that's why it led him to Adonis and to fulfill his "new" ideals. He knows it's a path that will not necessarily have a "good ending" but he's willing to sacrifice everything for it, and I think that's what makes me attracted to his character. Anyway, LMAO at how insistent Ichika was on seeing young Ogata with a buzzcut playing baseball, absolutely hilarious when she was ready to tie him up with a rope and search his room😂😂 It's pretty sad to see that Ogata wanted to be like Isshiki and save people with his justice without faltering in this cruel world but he just wasn't able to do it because hatred was what fuelled him to move forward and not forgiveness or hope. But I'm glad he encouraged Ichika to listen to Isshiki's song and hear Kazuki's guitar, because seeing Ichika show her emotions again, even if just a little bit was nice...

Uno Shion

Aww, it's cute how much Shion cares about Suzune, but also so cute how he's embarrassed to say he likes chocolate🤣 It's nice that he's more cooperative than Suzune I guess hahaha. I never expected Shion to like to paint though, that's interesting. Anyway, it's pretty sad to think that the "outside world" was much more unforgiving to the Uno siblings, and that it was only after they joined this terrorist organisation did they get to feel safe and secure that they have shelter and food without people going crazy on them. In that sense, it's understandable how much more comfortable Adonis would be for them. Aww Shion and Suzune getting excited over a chocolate cake is so adorable. Them saving up to buy a home for themselves is so heartwarming, it makes me really want to cheer for them. I'm dying from how cute they are trying to feed Ichika the chocolate cake too because they really like her and think she's really kind like their mother was before. Shion buying a cheese tart for both Ichika and Suzune was sweet, she's like a part of his thought process when buying stuff for his sister hahaha. Lol when he just shoved it into her mouth instead of giving it to her like a normal person🤣 Lmaoo when Shion drew a portrait of Ichika stuffing herself with cheese tart🤣 To think that Shion was so serious about drawing that he's actually thinking about a future with it after the X-Day stuff..it’s so endearing.

Sera Akito

It must be difficult for both Akito and Ichika to talk to each other. Just seeing each other's faces would make them remember the past and compare it to the present, making their whole encounter just...painful to watch. It's so like Akito to hide that he dislikes shiitake mushrooms so that it wouldn't inconvenience Ichika and make her remove it from the cooking menu. Lmaooo at Akito being so scared of bugs, enough that Ichika has to call cockroaches dark fairies to make him feel more at ease🤣 I'm sure Akito must be hurting too, but his consideration for Ichika above himself really makes my heart feel so warm. Awww, my heart swooned when Akito said his ideal type was Ichika! If only there was an Akito route~ Anyway, I didn't expect Akito and Soda to really interact but lmaoo at Soda having spent millions of yen on in-game stuff, Soda is right though, gacha rates are cruel😭😭 Aww, it was so cute how honest Soda was about wanting to have defeated the boss with Akito instead of dumping him and killing it himself, since what Soda values is playing together with other people. So, Kazuki was stabbed by a guy who was influenced by Adonis into taking revenge against his bullies or something, and I guess Kazuki was killed when he tried to step in? Honestly, I feel terrible for Akito. He was already feeling doubts and guilt over getting revenge for his sister, but after experiencing Kazuki's death, he must hate his choice for joining Adonis even more than before. It honestly broke my heart to see Akito break down like that not knowing how he could atone for his sins in causing Kazuki's death. His heartwrenching screams really cut me and made me tear up from all the pain Akito must have been bottling up all this time. Akito will always be my favourite side character, I think his pain, his feelings and his emotions were portrayed so well.

Sanjo Keisuke

Aww, Sanjo's favourite food being ramen is very him, kinda hahaha. I can't imagine a 7kg bowl of ramen and having to finish that in 30 minutes😱 On the other hand, Sanjo being into arcades is kinda unexpected, lmaooo at Ichika thinking he would play the crane games😂 I didn't think about the fact that Ichika is a former cop just like him now, I wonder how he feels about that or whether he even cares😅 Lmao at Sanjo seriously answering Ichika what his type of woman is and then even describing the body shape with sound effects😂 I can't believe Ichika just tickled Sanjo and made him laugh like crazy, I would have liked to see that😆😆 I think it would have been so nice if Ogata was Sanjo's boss, I feel like their values and ideals of justice back in the day would have matched well since Sanjo probably desired something "pure" back in the day and hoped to be a part of an organisation that helped people, and Ogata was always helping people already, so they would have worked well together. It's just sad that they both got betrayed by their ideals of what the police should have been to them and others.

 The idea that you can't feel any fear because you don't value your life is a pretty interesting and saddening thought. Maybe because I get that feeling sometimes. I agree with Sanjo, Zero definitely doesn't truly care about those ideals of saving the weak that he keeps spouting, he's not like Mikuni, and that's also imo the reason why Zero believes that he and Mikuni will never truly understand each other. Ichika and Sanjo eating ramen together is so cute lol.

Mikuni Rei

Lmao at Zero calling Mikuni an old man for liking fish, disliking carbonated drinks and other junk food because they're not nutritional hahaha. Otherwise, nothing much to say tbh, Mikuni has always been a rather bland character to me? I like him, but at the same time I don't because even though it's interesting to see that he actually has "noble" goals compared to Zero, the fact is that Mikuni as he himself said has been told that he's a "saviour" of sorts, and I think that really exemplifies the type of person Mikuni is. Someone who believes that he can and wants to "save" people in his own way as if he is someone above them all, but at the same time, he is very apparently flawed exactly because he is like that. He's not someone who truly understands the people "below" him and he also doesn't seem to perceive that as something that can be helped, and that's why even though his goals are "noble", he's not really noble at all. But it doesn't really change the fact that Mikuni is kind in his own way though. Mikuni eating shrimp crackers is so cute😂

Saeki Yuzuru

To be honest, I've always liked the chill policeman Saeki, and I personally think Zero likes that version of himself too. I feel like he always enjoyed just talking about stuff with Ichika during their drinking charades, and had fun visiting her. But at the same time, I feel like because of the existence of Adonis and Mikuni, Zero never really allowed his negative emotions to be "accepted" in order for him to move on, so instead it just continued piling up inside to the point of indifference towards the world and others imo. Anyway, it's sad, seeing Zero and Mikuni happily play chess together. They really look like two brothers just having fun in their own way. Hearing them say that they've been doing this since they were kids makes it all the more saddening when they realised that despite how "close" they were to each other, they never really understood each other. In a sense, I feel like in the end, both Mikuni and Zero use Adonis as a way to get the things they want and feel like it's one of the only ways they can do it? I mean, I do feel like Mikuni treasures his relationship with Zero more than Adonis or anything else, because when it comes down to it, I feel like he tries really hard to understand Zero by trying to see things from his perspective and hanging out with Ichika, the one that Zero thinks understands him best and the one Zero likes the most. On the other hand, Zero seems to use Adonis as a way for revenge of his mother and as a way to vent those emotions and scars he got, but at the same time Adonis also granted him Mikuni (a brother), and it gave him opportunities and power.

Zero definitely loves Ichika in an obsessed way, probably the only way he thinks he can love someone, since he doesn't want to become "weak" like his mother was. So if he felt anything like love, he would prefer it to be a love that would destroy him, because in a sense I think I can understand that sentiment of wanting the person you love to solely focus on yourself and no one else, whether that is hatred or whatever emotion doesn't matter, because being the entire focus of someone else's is a sort of "love" to enjoy, so I don't blame Zero for his twisted "love" lol. Especially since you can tell how much he has always enjoyed his after work beers and just chatting with Ichika. I quite enjoyed their little date walking around reminiscing the past and discovering new things they missed out on, now I really want to eat crepes🥲 The ending where Ichika kills Saeki is pretty sad though. Seeing Saeki the most relieved and happy he has ever been is probably what made me kinda happy for him though. He still sucks, but like Ichika said, I can't hate him, because it was true that he did reduce the sadness of many (whilst creating sadness for many others too though) and at the core, he was like in a sense a guy who consumed so much sadness from everywhere around him, always in pain, always sad despite his appearance, and thinking that makes it difficult for me to truly hate him.

Overall, I like the Adonis route! Initially, I was a bit sceptical whether it was really necessary and whether it would be interesting at all but I really loved bonding with all the executors. Seeing more of the human and emotional sides, seeing them warm up to Ichika and become friends with her really made me enjoy the "what could never be" part of it all. I think I especially loved Akito's because of how emotional it was tying into Kazuki and everything. But I also really enjoyed seeing the different sides of all of them. It really makes me wish Ichika got an individual route with like Akito and Sanjo and Ogata because I loveee them🥲🥲

Overall Review

I definitely enjoyed CxM: Unlimited much more than I thought I would! In the beginning, Sasazuka and Okazaki's routes kinda made me wonder whether I really wanted to continue this, but I'm so glad I got through them because I enjoyed Enomoto's, Yanagi's and Shiraishi's routes a lot! If I ranked them, I probably liked Shiraishi's the most, then Yanagi, Enomoto, Okazaki and then Sasazuka. It's definitely what I wanted in a fandisk, which is more fluffy romance and just bonding with all the guys even more, and I absolutely loveeee the potential romances with Yoshinari and Minegishi, they were so unexpectedly nice. Definitely no plot but that's okay since it's a fandisc and I think it fulfilled really well what its goal was when it comes to more romance in the story haha. 8/10! I'm definitely going to miss the characters, I'm so attached to Enomoto and them lol.

[emotionalcello-makefanfics]

Chapters: 2/? Fandom: Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics), Red Robin (Comics), Batman - All Media Types Rating: Mature Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Tim Drake/Jason Todd Characters: Tim Drake, Jason Todd, Tamara Fox, Some OC for cuteness Additional Tags: Angst, Fluff and Angst, Sickfic, Tim Drake is Not Robin, Tim Drake is Not Red Robin, Jason Todd is Red Hood, Tim Drake Needs a Hug, Jason Todd Needs A Hug, Crying, so much crying, Love Confessions, Cheesy, God it's so cheesy, Cringe, So sweet so cheesy so angsty that you'll cringe, Tim Drake-centric, some Jason POV tho, A wild X-men appereance, I know they're not the same universe but I'm running out of character and running out of creativity, So yeah X-men characters and vaugly their mansion/orphanage too, Bruce Wayne Bashing, Some things that I don't put down bcs it'll be a spoiler, Smoking, Implied/Referenced Sex, POV from a cat????, The Clichést Cliché that ever Cliché, Cliche Summary:

They meet again on a rooftop after ten years. They're different now, and things are not the same. It's all too late. Chapter 1 sneakpeek

“Don’t jump.”

Sighing exasperatedly, Tim puts down his cigarette-clutching fingers and drags his eyes to the source of the voice. His gelled-back hair loses its hold and a strand of ear-length bangs falls to his vision.

Sadly, without seeing him and just from the voice, Tim knows exactly who this person is. One of the Bat franchise, and it just had to be the Red Hood variation, fucking great. Out of all time, it has to be tonight. The world is playing a joke on him.

Tim is sitting hunched on the rooftop’s edge, wishing he’d have some peace and quiet for once, and of course one of these pestering bats just has to bug him at the worst time. Yet, it’s actually pretty rare for Red Hood to patrol Gotham lately, and Tim curses up a storm in his mind. Out of all the days, it just has to be fucking tonight.

No, Tim is not having it.

“This man has too much to do tomorrow to jump.” Tim looks away, getting a light from his suit.

One hand lighting another one of his death stick, and the other unbuttoning his suit and loosens his tie. After a puff and two, Tim drags in and keeps the smoke in, letting his nerves uncoil. Seems like it doesn’t work that well when the big bad shadow of a vigilante doesn’t move from the corner of his eyes.

“I’m not jumping, go away, I can’t deal with you tonight,” Tim says as he sighs the smoke away to the red polluted sky, thinking the man must be deaf or just not convinced. Maybe the latter, the bats are famous for their tact after all. People say they’re purely human. Seeing Red hood’s physique, maybe this one becomes meta-human at some point.

Tim looks the other way so the vigilante is completely out of his vision, to make a point that he’s not having this conversation. He looks to the city, engulfed by the red sky. It’s bright since this building is at the heart of the city, where the higher caste of Gothamites live and prosper. You can see the border around the bright side of the city where the lights stop dead and darkness begins. The poor side of the city. The gap is ghastly, it’s what makes Gotham what it is.

Tim is not surprised but highly disappointed when he hears shuffling instead, and when he looks at where the tall brick wall of a man, he already sits down next to him. Red Hood keeps a respectable distance though, at least he has that much of a tact.

Red Hood hooks his fingers inside his helmet, does some finger shimmy, and the red shiny mask helmet is off. His face is still covered by a domino mask, his hair looks damp, and his gloved hands rake his jet black hair back. Curls bounce to his forehead, sighing a fog, the only indication that the weather is reaching the end of the year. In turn, Tim felt his cleanly shaved nape chilled.

From inside the leather jacket, the vigilante digs to look for something, and that’s when Tim realized he’s been looking at the cuts on Red Hood’s exposed forearms from the folded sleeves. Very thick and muscled forearms. This guy either lifts all day or a meta-human, not that Tim cares anymore.

“Got a light?” Red says, plush lips smirking.

Tim sighs, guess he has company today. He digs into his suit and throws him his lighter. The masked man inspects it and Tim rolls his eyes. The lighter is a metal one that you flip, and on it engraved ‘From my heart with love, that this one lasts longer, Tam.’

“A sweetheart of yours?” Says the man, the second sentence he speaks, and Tim doesn’t recognize the voice. Deep, gravely, the typical voice of someone that smokes.

Red Hood extends his hand to give back the lighter to Tim instead of throwing it, must’ve thought it’s special.

“Kind of,” Tim says, receiving the lighter.

Red Hood drags in, keeps the smoke in, “Why kind of?” and sighs.

“Never established the relationship.”

“Commitment issues?”

Tim quirks an eyebrow at the man, sitting just as hunched as him. There’s a pillar beside Tim, and he lays his back there, thinking whether or not he should engage in this conversation. Eh, why not right? It’s not like it’s confidential information, and Tim is just so tired of caring about social politics.

“I was too late,” Tim says. It’s not as painful to say now, but lately, Tim has been numb. He’s been numb for years. Tim’s gay, or so he thought. When he began to really love her, she’s gone from him.

“Girl got another guy?” Red Hood teases.

“Girl got dead,” Tim deadpans. The smile dropped from the vigilante’s mouth, and if only he can see his eyes, panic would look funny on the all-powerful Bat. But, no, Tim can see his tell by the tapping hands.

“Ah fuck, sorry.”

Tim chuckles at the spectacle of an awkward vigilante. Maybe this night won’t be so bad after all.

“Relax, I’m not too sad about it now, it was years ago.”

It’s hard to predict Red’s expression with that domino mask that takes his cheekbones and half his forehead, but Tim’s pretty sure the twist on that mouth means his opinion of Tim isn’t good. Well, not that Tim cares.

“How did she die?”

“Wrong place, wrong time,” Tim put the filter on his lips and drags in as deep as he can. Too deep, and Tim coughs hard, once and twice that his vision blurs. Her face comes to vision, the morbidity of her expression tips Tim’s nerves off balance. Tim quickly takes another deep drag, “She was in the Joker’s way.”

At the name, Red Hood snaps his face at Tim. Slowly, languidly, Tim looks back. The vigilante clenched jaw and balled fists look like he’s about to kill somebody. Tim knows that a few years ago Red Hood kidnapped Joker, didn’t kill him, and just vanished before popping up again to have a vendetta against Batman. What a load of drama those bunch.

This also means that Tim knows exactly who this person is. Suddenly the voice registers, the familiar jaw, the soft fucking tone.

He blames it on the nicotine that his heart is calmer than he’d like, his mind still not on overdrive, still plagued with Tam’s face as she died in front of him. He’d breathe smoke instead of oxygen if he could. God he wished he’d breathe smoke from now on. Why does it have to be today? One grace from the universe is that Tim -for some reason- feels amused instead of dread.

“You look like you’re about to kill somebody, Red,” Tim says, can’t help the ease and sass in his voice. Tim lays back hunched, crosses his legs. “I thought you let go of your vendetta against the Joker.”

“Where do you hear that bullshit?” Redhood snaps and Tim can’t help but let go another chuckle.

“People talk, words get around,” Tim says.

“Then they’re far off the truth,” Red hisses before dragging in his cig.

“Yet the Joker still roams.”

“Ain’t my call.”

“Is it the big bat daddy calls?”

Red Hood splutters at the name and Tim smirks evilly at the reaction. “Ew, don’t call him that!”

“I can call that higher-than-thou furry hero wannabe anything I want,” Tim spits bitterly, looking out to the city. Sometimes when he’s really lucky, he’ll catch one of the bats twirling in the sky, and now one of ‘em is sitting beside him, but sadly it’s not the most shocking knowledge he has today. “One of these days it’s going to be my turn.”

“What?”

“Dying in the collision of mad men’s evil master plan you refuse to get rid of.”

“Ck, I don’t like what you’re insinuating.”

“Sorry then, I don’t mean to insinuate anything. This is me telling you loud and clear that you’re all cowards for not killing these maniacs that kill us like ants when you have the power to stop them.” Tim’s voice is even and chill, it did not raise a tone, but it reduces the bulk of a man beside him to still. “Some of us rooted for you when you caught the Joker, and your reputation gives us high hopes that it’ll be the last of him. Then he showed up again.” Tim feels the lighter in his pocket burn, “Then Tam died.”

Tim pumps his lung full of smokes, keeping it in there so that the clawing gloom will die before it takes roots.

“I almost did kill him, Batman stopped me,” the gravel voice says lowly.

Tim feels himself stiffens, now that’s something he doesn’t know. His eyes scan the hunched vigilante, trying to find any sign of a lie, there’s none.

“Shit,” Tim curses, sighing up smoke and quickly takes a deep drag in. “Fuck Batman.”

For the first time, Tim hears Red chuckle, “Yeah, fuck him.”

“Still your family though, right?” Tim says, earning what he thinks is a glare, who would fucking know with that mask. “Why else would you stay in his line?”

Red Hood looks away, not answering.

“Guess I understand. Proving something to someone.”

Red scoffs, “Would you?”

“You know who I am.”

“Yeah, not your story.”

Tim scoffs at the obvious lie, “Look it up. I have better things to do than telling you my backstory that’s a google search away.”

Tim Drake. Son of the CEOs of Drake Industries. Running smoothly since ever he becomes the COO. Yada yada, young and successful, yada yada, has the reputation to chew out the reporters and a resting bitch face, all that shit. Tim doesn’t have the best bedside manners, but when it comes to business, Tim gets things done, and his business partners know to swallow their pride for a potential too stupid to missed just because Tim has fangs.

“I dunno, you’re pretty mysterious in the eye of the media,” Red says.

“Because they’re nosy pricks and not worth my time when they’re asking me about rumors of my flings.”

“They’re not true?”

“What the fuck are you? Does TMZ sent you?”

“Good point, never mind.”

They let the quiet settle in, and Tim isn’t too bothered by the company so much. The red amber eats to his filter. Tim puts out the light and puts the bud back inside the pack while he gets another one. He looks down at his light, which reminded him of Tam. Damn, she was such a good assistant, she’s also his best friend but a damn better assistant. Tim doesn’t let himself think about it.

He lights another, and puffs.

“Shouldn’t you be patroling?” Tim says before he can stop himself.

“Nah, not here to patrol, just some errands.”

“Don’t mind me. I’m not jumping.”

“No, I know that,” Red says, tone softer that Tim narrows his eyes at him.

“Lonely?” Tim teases, putting the filter in his lips while locking eyes to the pair of white lenses.

Red shrugs, “Just wanna kill time with someone that doesn’t wear one of these,” he says, tapping to his domino mask.

Tim hums imagining himself with his family, “Yeah, me too, I’d take a vigilante franchise over family dinner anytime.”

“Aww,” Red surprisingly coos, making Tim flustered.

“Don’t get it twisted, my family sets a pretty low bar for good company.”

“I can say the same, Timmy.”

Tim flinches, “I didn’t say you can call me Timmy.”

“What about friends then?” Red follows up, ignoring him.

“Joker killed my only best friend. Oh god, stop making that face, everyone I know got someone they know killed by the Joker, or Bane, or.... shit just those freaks.”

“Doesn’t make me feel better.”

“I don’t care what you feel.”

“I’m wounded,” Red says in that joking ‘boo-hoo’ voice but it was the last thing to snap Tim’s patience completely. He hates this casual conversation as if nothing happened.

“I’m not jumping, and I know you’re not here just to talk to some random civilian. You know who I am, so say what you wanna say and go,” Tim inhales deeply after the low-toned rant, only to be met with another silence.

They stay quiet for a few whiles again. Smoking the tension away. After Tim’s cig burns halfway, his nerves calmed down. Then he realizes that Red is looking at him. Staring.

“What?” Tim says, sighing smoke.

“Would you kill Joker if you could?”

“In a heartbeat.”

“Killing someone isn’t as easy as it sounds, especially if you did it before.”

“You underestimate my anger then.”

Red Hood goes still for what Tim is insinuating. His phone vibrates in his pocket. Tim gets it and his new assistant reminds him of a flight in an hour and he needs to be ready in half. Tim puts out his cig and pockets it.

As he stands up, he looks down at Red Hood, really looks at him. It reminded Tim of the time has passed. It’s been so long.

“Nothing to say?” Tim asks, he has an underlying tone of ‘last chance.’

“Thanks for the light.”

Tim clenches his jaw and breaths slowly. What did he expect? “You caught me at a bad time but it’s good to meet you again, Jason.”

When Tim walks away, his elbow is grabbed and he’s spun to face Jason in all his bulk. Looming over him with his height.

“You know who I am?” Red says with a threat in his voice that makes Tim wants to laugh.

“Are you really that surprised? Or did you forget me when you fucking died?” Tim smiles bitterly.

Moments passed, eyes on each other, chest to chest. The last time he sees Jason, Tim was staring at these white lenses too, and Jason was still as tall as him. At this close, Tim sees tiny tears that heal pale than the rest of his tan skin, bulked up body looming over him that used to be similar to his. For anyone, Tim had two best friends, Robin and Jason Wayne-Todd, he had known the two are the same. Seems like Jason doesn’t.

Doesn’t matter now. Everything said and done. Too late.

“Say your goodbyes now,” Tim says, because why else would his childhood friend pops back again after a decade of not saying anything after he returned to life. Tim doesn’t realize it’ll hurt this bad though. Missing Tam doesn’t hurt this bad.

Perhaps it was because the scar never healed right, but he still thinks of Jason like a big chunk of him that’s been torn away forcefully, even now.

“I’m sorry,” Jason finally says, low and guilty, as he should be, but it irks Tim to no end.

“I lost you, and when you’re back you didn’t tell me,” Tim says, his voice cracks and he curses it to hell. Red Hood’s been around for years, and Jason never came to Tim to say he’s alive.  “If you have nothing else to say, let go of me.”

“I didn’t know that you knew.”

“What?”

“I didn’t know you know I was Robin... Did you know... everyone?”

Tim rolls his eyes, “Yes.” Gloved hands still on his elbow, and white lenses not letting him go. The non-challant face he wears slips off as if oil just slicked between the mask and his skin. His heart picks up a beat. There are layers between their skin, Jason’s thick gloves and Tim’s three-piece suit, but it feels warmer. Burning.

“Damn,” Jason curses under his breath.

It’s just a little thing, but Jason’s silence following that is a nother prick to Tim’s skin.

“Is that all?” Tim dismissed, pulling his arm away, but Jason only holds tighter.

“I didn’t know, okay?” Jason pushes, “And you’re a civilian, you’re not supposed to know Jason Todd is back to the land of the living.”

“A civilian,” Tim mutters under his breath. That’s all he is to Jason? All this time. His chest hurts, Tim knows this is because of Jason’s words instead of anything else. “Get away from me.”

“I’ll see you again,” Jason says before letting go.

Before Tim can say don’t bother, the man puts on his red helmet and grapples away. For a moment Tim can see the shadow of red yellow green flying away.

[youtiaoshutiao]

传闻中的陈芊芊 thoughts

i haven’t been very active lately but i just came on to say, i binged on the romance of tiger and rose / 传闻中的陈芊芊 and have 2 eps left and i love it SO SO MUCH. i was expecting some pure crack but beyond that, i really ended up catching much feels for it?

and i think beyond the outlandish hilarity of some of the scenes and the cheeky meta, it’s actually a pretty decent drama with its plot and character motivations largely dictated by logic. i have to commend the scriptwriter nan zhen 南镇 for the entire set up of the drama (and it’s her original script!!! which is so rare in the industry nowadays run over by book adaptations - i mean i love those too but i still think it’s an easy way out for production companies when they adapt books with established fan bases). it’s actually really clever of her because all plot holes/flaws in world building can easily be attributed to xiaoqian’s lousy scriptwriting abilities?

i really did become quite impressed with the plot as the episodes progressed haha. the conflict and plot thickens as xiaoqian, now as qianqian, with the mindset that she’s not part of this story at all and that she’s interacting with a bunch of characters on paper, continues to engineer plot machinations trying to steer the plot in the right direction to get to the end so she can return back to the real world. and you slowly see how that just devolves into complete chaos and plot twists when surprise! she IS part of the story, she IS interacting with these characters and they are influenced by what she says and does! so you have her original male lead hanshuo, destined for the female lead chuchu, falling in love instead with her and changing his entire plan because of that. you have chuchu, the original female lead, slowly growing more unhinged as she perceives qianqian’s actions and words as callous and uncaring and outrightly antagonistic towards herself and as her resentment builds when everyone seems to shower affection and attention on qianqian still.

adding on to that is, how xiaoqian as a scriptwriter views and perceives her characters? some characters like hanshuo, she clearly constructed with much care and love, as seen by how she knows exactly how to make hanshuo happy and doesn’t want to upset him in the initial episodes (which caused him to fall for her like a devoted puppy). yet it seems like she either didn’t grasp fully their character motivations/personality/how their character is moulded by their backgrounds? which is why she probably didn’t see how the inherent difference with which her mother treats qianqian vs chuchu would lead to jealousy and resentment seeping in and poisoning chuchu’s heart. and her visualising han shuo as a murderous calculating career-driven male lead aka the male lead of eastern palace clearly runs contrary to how he is total putty and has barely hurt a fly ever since he fell in love with qianqian.

and there are characters too like her mother that she originally clearly just wrote in as characters to steer the plot forward, and in-world, she is clearly stricken when she realises how they have emotions and hidden depths beyond what she fathomed - like when her and her mother had that semi HTHT after she stole the dragon bone and her mum stayed by her bedchamber to watch over her all night. and another example would be su ziying - she’s so happy to see him when he appears as in that moment she’s viewing him from the lens of the scriptwriter of this story and she knows he’s going to push the plot forward. but seeing him and his actions actually playing out - she gets irritated by what he does and also his actions actually do end up affecting her, because she is in the story too!!!

and moving on from that, as the plot further progresses, another spanner is thrown into the mix when she realises that male lead is really really in love with her! and would give up everything for her! and... she too is in love with him!! and this changes things too because while initially all her actions were to push the plot to move forward the way she originally wrote it so that she can head back, now she’s actively trying to push back against the flow of events, as she’s now emotionally invested in this and doesn’t want the male lead to die as per her original script.

the play out of all these was really really entertaining and gripping to watch?? i was legitimately bowled over by how affected i was when all the angst came in, because it really felt like it made sense amidst all the crack and was well set up? and throughout it all, the actions of all the main players in the plot made sense and were logical, even the secondary leads chuchu and peiheng. haha idek if i’m ascribing too much credit to this whole plot, maybe it’s really just meant to be a cracky fun time and i’m too into it HAHA.

there’s also the set up of huayuan city being a matriarchal society where basically the roles of women and men are reversed. it is really v trippy!!! and An Experience to see scenes like men being harrassed by women, people tittering at other men for not being covered up enough in public, wares that can increase your chances of birthing a female heir being peddled on the streets. initially i was kind of apprehensive as to how it was going to play out. now at ep 22 where they’ve gone to xuanhu city which is patriarchal the conversation regarding gender roles and gender equality is continuing!! but i shall reserve my thoughts and comments till the entire arc plays out.

but beyond all that, the drama is just so much fun fun funnnnn!!!! i loveddddd seeing how this drama about a scriptwriter getting stuck in her own script had scenes interspersed with storytellers on the street retelling qianqian’s exploits and qianqian’s regular meetups with the storytellers/opera writers to discuss how the plot of the drama was going or even the scene where hanshuo and peiheng went to the opera house for their male lead showdown and the opera characters were there saying all the rude things they wanted to say to each other. such fun meta?? breaking the fourth wall?? satire?? idek LOL i just know i enjoyed it thoroughly

and lastly, apart from all the thinky thinky stuff, i’m thoroughly charmed by the otp HAHA. i loveeeee qianqian so much and zhao lusi is soo effortlessly adorable and natural and charming in this role that i can totally see why everyone from han shuo to her mother is enamoured by her. i actually am really curious also to see how qianqian before xiaoqian transmigrated into her body was like - seeing how her servant didn’t seem to have any whiplash from an extreme change in personality suggest that maybe qianqian wasn’t all that different from xiaoqian?? and probably might not have been that spoilt/callous/havoc-wreaking as everyone perceives her to be?

and han shuo too is SO entertaining and funny and darling - when he first came to huayuan city he’s all “i’m cunning and smart and i’m going to MANIPULATE EVERYBODY for my/xuan hu city’s benefit” and “i want chen qianqian to die with ten thousand arrows through her heart!! i want her to be stabbed by knives three thousand times!! not a single time less!!!” and “do you think i don’t dare to kill you?!”. then he falls in love with her and instantly he’s all puppy eyes and utter devotion. IT’S DELICIOUS. ding yuxi really makes staring at your FL like she’s the only one in the world an art form. and as one comment on a bilibili mv said regarding han shuo’s supposed bloodlust, “han shuo, up to this point you’ve only killed one horse” HAHA

(keep in mind that it’s not even that han shuo ordered the killing of this horse, it was his subordinate that killed it on his behalf, and han shuo was Not Happy about it after that!)

together the otp are even more adorable!!! it’s teeth rotting fluff but yet it comes off very earnest and adorable without being cloying. i was literally clutching my heart and grinning at the screen dopily at some scenes. and even though the otp dynamic and character setups are not really the same, the way the two of them bicker and act like children around each other kind of remind me of yongqi and xiaoyanzi from hzgg for some reason lol.

and apart from the otp, there are a whole host of supporting characters that are really very funny and adorable and entertaining to watch haha. special shoutout to both han shuo and qianqian’s subordinates who are HILARIOUS and plain Done with their masters’ nonsense (especially bai ji who really just wants to get shit done okay!! but his master just keeps on wanting to fall in love and date!!) there’s also qianqian’s older sister yuanyuan who is disabled and on a wheelchair, and with a sad yet somehow hilarious penchant for writing multiple drafts of her will. and her otp, su mu, a courtesan (yes the courtesans in this city are all male).

honestly i’m not sure where i’m going with this, i just briefly scanned through what i’ve written so far and lol seems like paragraphs of illogical incoherent rambling. I’m sorry it’s 5am over here i’m not really thinking straight T_T i just have a lot of feels for this drama okay ;_____;

[watchinglikeafangirl]

Kiss Me Again - first reactions

Out of boredom, I started watching Kiss Me Again also because I've already watched Dark Blue Kiss. I saw many people saying both shows should be seen as two seperable things because some important details got lost on the way of making spin-off.

Let's see how much of a difference there actually is. From what I've heard, Pete is going to be very different. Anyway, here are my first reactions during the watching process:

Episode 1

Oh well, Pete is so different. He's a whole other person here. He's the typical cool guy who just wants to show off but at the same time, he's a bit socially awkward and I love it. This faked boredom and annoyment are only there because he doesn't know what to say when Kao is around and especially when they are alone because the atmosphere is just weird between them. Acting all annoyed is his way of socializing and I like it because I believve we all have weird tactics to try to lighten the mood or find a topic with peopl we don't know. Here, Pete is "annoyed" to look cool but I guess, he does this because he tries to find something they both can agree on and annoyment is the simpliest way. You can easily agree with people on negative emotions concearning a topic, so it's the easiest choice to pretend to be annoyed. What's funny here is that Kao is really not impressed by it and already knows Pete just wants to be cool. I think, Kao just doesn't like Pete in the beginning because he sees Pete is just pretending and is never true. I guess, that's why he will fall for him later, because they will probably have real talks and bonding moments.

Episode 2

Okay, Pete and Kao shared an awkward kiss and now things are even more weird. Here's one difference to the Pete I know from Dark Blue Kiss: he's not honest. Now, whenever Kao wants to address the kiss, Pete gets defensive and aggressive. Yes, it's probably because of his confusion but in Dark Blue Kiss, Pete always addresses everything - even the uncomfortable or negatively loaded topics - but not at this moment.

And also, I know, Pete is not the nicest person at this moment but he is really respectless. After the kiss, he stares into Kao's eyes in surprise, pulls away and then wipes his mouth in disgust more than once. As if Kao's lips and the taste of them are dirt on his lips and that's so disrespectful. Kao is obiously hurt by it and I would be too. Of course, you are allowed to not like a kiss but reacting so disgusted is very harsh.

Episode 3

And now, Pete is bullying Kao by isolating him from the group. He makes the others believe Kao doesn't like them, so he will end up being the king of the group since Kao is not the kind of person who talks about such things and just accepts the circumstances.

The scene between So and Sansuay in the parking lot was obviously not right bahavior on So's part because Sansuay was clearly uncomfortable being pressed against another car. She had no way out and I love the random dude walking by and just checking if she is okay. No romanticizing. Just a statement that this behavior is wrong.

Episode 4

Pete and Kao now claim to be "annoyed" of each other and all the other ones are still left wondering what the real problem is.

But at least, Pete confides to Sandee and confesses he only gets angry because of the kiss. I mean, we as the audience understand him better but I just find Sandee's frustration very amusing. Pete is obviously not realizing his feelings and is just helpless. Sandee is such a mood.

Until now, I really don't like R at all. He is pushing Sanwan around and invades her ersonal space all the time while saying he cares. Dude, if you care, don't force her, don't drag her into your car and especially don't kiss her when she doesn't want to.

Episode 5

Its just my speculation but I'm pretty sure Pete is bisexual because he has an ex-girlfriend (we know of) but seems to be attracted to both gender and he's not the kind of guy who falls for the personality or character of someone. The gender matters to him, I would say. But it's nice to see a bisexual character because mostly shows want to tell me that people are either homo- or heterosexual but there are obviously many other sexualities in between. Living in a gay relationship doesn't mean you define yourself as homosexual, real life doesn't work like that and I like they give us a character who is neither homo- or heterosexual.

What's going on with the men in that show? WHy are there so many red flags? Except for Kao, Mat and Sun, everybody pushes the women around and invades their personal space in a very uncomforting manner. Are they all going to "change"? I don't know if I will be able to believe them...

Episode 6

Mat's mother wants Sanson to "turn her son straight"? Okay, just gonna leave that there because I don't have words how wrong this thought is.

Oh, the scene which I saw many gifs of, happened. But I thought Pete and Kao would spend more time laying in the grass. I though this was a very romantic scene. But it's just a second long. But who cares, their relationship took a next step. They stop fighting and come to some sort of agreement (the agreement being that fighting is pointless). But somehow this scene feels like they broke the ice and finally found peace.

Episode 7

And again, a scene I've seen very often: the hospital. But it's really sweet they all went there because of Pete and wait all together until he can go home. That's real friendship and I think this show portrays their friend group really accurate because they are so natural with each other. They are a bunch of people thrown together who bond over weird fun talks at night and getting home drunk. Even though they are so different, they are loyal and trustworthy. It's heartwarming to see a group of friends be portrayed like this because mostly in shows, the protagonist has one really good friend and just a few people they know but are not very close to. but a group of friends is exactly this and it's rare on TV because showing a whole group bonding is difficult and also because they dynamic is totally different.

Episode 8

Kao (giving me the chills): Mint, even if he doesn't like you back, it doesn't mean you are not good enough. No matter how beautiful you are, no matter how good you try to be to him, if he's not into you, he's not the one for you.

I can't believe So gets away with stealing Sansuay's phone. She will never know it was him. I don't know what to think about him.

Epsiode 9

Sun flirting with Kao over coffee makes me cringe so much right now. This is uncomfortable and not as romantic as Sun may think it is. And then, Kao is scared Sun meant him, this is uncomforting to watch. Also, I really don't think Kao and Sun are a match. It doesn't fit at all and I hope it will be over soon.

What? Wayu wants to rape Sanwan? Did I miss something? How did we get here? I thought this was a warm show for teenagers. Now there's rape? I could deal with the sexual harassment even though that was not fine to watch, but rape? I'm confused how we got there? But of course, R saved her.

Not Mork casually cleaning his gun...

Episode 10

I love the fact Pete and Kao just quietly accept the fact they spend a night together. It happened and they can't change it. They don't even mention it and I'm relieved there's no "don't ever tell anybody" or something. It just happened and that's it. Nothing further to dicuss about it. Also, they made pretty clear already they have certain feelings for each other. The wuestio now is just how they are going to deal with this and if they will be in a relationship.

Kao: I will stop seeing other people when things between us become clearer.

Episode 11

I can't believe they actually address the bullying I mentioned before. Kao is very right when he says Pete needs to earn his trust because of the past. This is just right because you can't forget the past just because of romantic feelings. If you don't address the other person made you feel ad, you won't be able to move on from that and relationships are about trust, so I find this very mature and good for both of them. Pete needs to understand he hurt Kao in the past and can't just change his mind over night and Kao will say yes right away.

A planned engagement? Isn't that a bit old-fashioned? Sanwan and R don't know each other at all and why would their parents decide this for them. It doesn't look like it would be good for family's business or something. This seems so random.

And Wayu tries to rape Sanwan again? How? Why? And what is wrong with Sindee for initializing this? But of course, R saves her again.

Episode 12

Oh Mint. I always had mixed feelings about her and now i know for what reason. Is she fine? Making someone feel bad for leeting her go by threatening she would hurt herself is not healthy or normal or anything. That's a serious matter. No wonder, Pete feels like his life is messed up and is extremely stressed about it. And then, Mint woders why he's not comfortable at all and doens't see Pete just let her stay out of fear her threat might be the truth. Because he's a nice person. But Mint is just crazy and plays mind games.

I've never seen a drunk kiss be that cute and meaningful. They are just pure. Now, I really know why people love Pete and Kao so much. I already fell in love with their dynamic in Dark Blue Kiss but seeing the beginnings of their relationship tops that. This script is too good. They both know, the kiss meant a lot and I like they are way past the regretment state. Or at least, they don't regret the kiss. They regret they are not in a relationship which makes the atmosphere afterwards more sad and hurt. Again, they are so mature about this.

Mint took a picture? I can't with this woman.

Episode 13

Why did tehy not report Wayu? They are covering up a crime. And Sanwan doesn't seem to be traumatized which makes me wonder a lot. She is more than fine and I'm not buying Wanyu's apology at all.

And now Mint send the picture to Pete's dad. Does she have no shame? It's not her right to out Pete. That's a thing between Pete, his dad and Kao. Mint has and nothing to do with it and shouldn't have ever. She took Pete's power away by letting his dad now. Things were in Pete's hands and I hope Pete will tell mint very clearly she had no right to do that and her behavior is wrong.

Wow, Pat has guts. Telling your best friend you like them even though you know they don'yt like you is very brave. I love Mat being so cool with it because it's obviously a hard moment for Pat to outlive.

Episode 14

I love Pete's dad. They both were so scared but he doesn't say anything and I like what he says. He talks with them like they are adults (which they are) and doesn't talk to them like they are kids who don't know anything. They don't need to be lectured by their parents. They are adults already and make their own life decisions. I like very much he has this calm talk with them and then drops the topic.

Sanson being the first to confess fits very good because mAt is alway the wuieter one of them. This scene is so bittersweet and Sanson is so vulnerable, it hurts my heart. If it stays like this, then it would be a strong statement of the show because not everything works out in the end. You can try, you can ask, but in the end, maybe your efforts were all for nothing.

Finally, Pete calls Mint out. But he forgives her?... But at least, he doesn't want to be her friend any more.

Of corse we have happy endings all over the place.

[szivtalan]

character ask: kagami, momoi, alex and himuro 👀👀👀

!!! omg thank u Ceru! u might be one of my favorite mutuals <33 (putting this under a read more just so I can speak at lengths about each individual character)

Why I like Kagami: this is where I sarcastically ask “why DON’T i like him” but that’s literally the next question so; he’s everything i want to be and more. He has the determination and the willpower to make his own dreams come true, he’s gay as shit, he’s tall and buff and well-adjusted, mature enough to live on his own at an annoyingly young age, he’s funny and dumb and a total himbo as well as an excellent advisor bc of how grounded he is.

Why I don’t: I’m... not really good with explosive people. Violent men with loud voices especially scare me, and I’d think I’d flinch around him a lot and that would make me rlly anxious.

Favorite episode: it’s a toss-up between the Seirin fam visiting his place for the first time (is it where Kuroko confesses his love to him and then passes out in his arms? idk), and the onsen episode. I also loved all his plays against Kise and Aomine. AND the training camp w him running a lot in the sand.

Favorite season/movie: season 2 probably because he’s not a jerk anymore, but he’s still on his way to shed off any asshole behavior stuck to him. And I actually liked Last Game?

Favorite line: “There’s no such thing as useless effort.” and “This is our drama and we write the plot.” because he’s so ridiculous.

Favorite outfit: all of his casual fits... comfy but manly is my Jam

OTP: AoKaga....they’re truly soulmates, star-crossed lovers, canonically brought together by fate.

Brotp/otp no. 2: KagaKuro, I love them

Head Canon: I have several collections because I think too much about this boy, but here’s something I think about his family: he doesn’t know what happened to his mom. He never asked, because it wasn’t relevant, and he didn’t want to inconvenience his dad by questioning him. Occasionally, as a kid he felt like he was missing out on something (seeing other kids with their moms, feeling like they’re being treated with much more gentle care because they have moms), but as he grew older he realized that nurturing behavior shouldn’t have been limited to only a mother, and that he was just straight up neglected without any regards to missing a parent in his life.

Unpopular opinion: I never realized this was an unpopular opinion but I’m glad he went back to America at the end of Last Game. Obviously, it’s sad that he had to separate from the others, but I felt like Japanese basketball has always been just a stepping point to him, and now that he’d beat the best of them, it was time to move on. And it also warms my heart that him getting scouted in the US gave Aomine hope to aim big, too. I felt like both of them would’ve felt trapped in Japan with their skill sets.

A wish: I want him to be happy and gay and to confront Himuro and tell him how hurt he was by how he treated him and probably do the same to his dad too

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: ....whatever I’d say Shinsun has probably written it/will write it, but I don’t want him to forget about the GoM just because he becomes a world-famous athlete.

5 words to best describe them: sweet child with anger issues

My nickname for them: not mine (it’s Sypha’s) but “Kags”, Kagami, Tigerboy, Kagababe, Baby

Why I like Momoi: she is SO nurturing and sweet and she cares so much about her boys!! I’m sorry it always turns into “how they remind me of myself” but actually I get feeling like a background character and being the moral/emotional/physical support of those who are more talented or in any way better than you. I feel a strange kind of kinship with her and also,,, feminine girls make my heart stop, and it doesn’t get more feminine than Momoi. Added: Aomine aside, the Touou team wouldn’t worth shit without her skills tbh, and she’s not in any way less than the GoM. Also, I appreciate her being the one person to try to keep their friend group together.

Why I don’t: Analytical People Scare me like!! how do u know stuff people are Unknowable!! I usually am also irked by her pointing out Riko’s breast size but I can just pretend that’s in a gay way (maybe Momoi likes girls with small boobs and she’s just bad at flirting) (also I don’t exactly liked her calling Aomine a “ganguro” but I have too little knowledge on the use of this word to say exactly why)

Favorite episode (scene if movie): uh the one where Aomine made her cry? It really came through how much love she actually has for her friends at that one.

Favorite season/movie: she was great in all of them!!

Favorite line: I can’t remember the exact quote and Google isn’t really helpful either but the one where she made Kuroko promise they’ll always play together or something? Or that they’re gonna beat Aomine?? idk?

Favorite outfit: I like all of them but mostly I just appreciate her wearing so many hoodies, she looks so cute in them

OTP / Brotp: it’s both AoMomo. I feel like the have the most special and strongest bond in the entire series.

Head Canon: She’s never been shown to do, but I feel like she wears Aomine’s clothes a Lot. Also, they definitely have sleepovers To This Day.

Unpopular opinion: Momoi is good at basketball and she loves playing!!! But try being successful in it when ur opponents are Giants and Way More Buff than you are

A wish: I wish people appreciated her more!! Both in fandom and in canon. She’s an amazing person and she has her own skills and strengths that are rarely explored or even mentioned anywhere.

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: her falling out with her boys ;-; I do not want that

5 words to best describe them: strawberry sweetheart to steal ur heart

My nickname for them: Satsuki :> I feel like it’s a little too much to call characters on their first names sometimes but hers is so cute I can’t

Why I like Alex: yet again another woman with an extensive skill set. I love her persistence and again I appreciate getting disillusioned and finding your way back to the thing you love. Also it’s just sweet that she did that by teaching (again, something I can relate to)

Why I don’t: the whole “kissing children” thing rubbed me the wrong way but again, just like Momoi’s obsession with comparing breast sizes, it’s just bad/sexist writing from Fujimaki probably

Favorite episode (scene if movie): adshg any and all where she expressed that Himuro and Kagami are equally important to her <33 that shit makes my heart burst

Favorite season/movie: she only appears towards the end of s2 and in s3 so... I guess s3?

Favorite line: its so Bad that u literally can’t find the iconic quotes of these iconic ladies anywhere but... her story on finding her passion again through teaching kids, and anytime she mentions her fondness of Kagami and Himuro.

Favorite outfit: her iconic olive green coat with the short red shorts... wtf was that I loved it.

OTP: she doesn’t really interact with people her age but I’ve heard she’s shipped with Masako Araki and I’ve seen some seriously good fanarts and like... Yes Good I’d Love To See It

Brotp: I feel like her and Himuro would be that sassy pair that Kagami tries and fails to contain and they get into all sorts of weird, absurd situations asdjs what I’m trying to say is Kagami has to bail them out of jail from time to time

Head Canon: fck me if I’m wrong but she’s the lesbian single mom of the two gay kids she reluctantly adopted from the streets

Unpopular opinion: it’s more like another headcanon, but she can dunk and she taught Kagami how to do it.

A wish: I’d love her to coach the Seirin fam more!! Pls let her be part of her children’s lives (she could also judge streetball games between the goms it would be fun)

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: anything about her being romantically involved with her pupils makes me.................no

5 words to best describe them: Beautiful Beach Blonde Basketball....goddess

My nickname for them: Alex!! sometimes An Icon

Why I like Himuro: em dash Asdgsdj I’m joking, I’m becoming more and more fond of the boy. Once I realized that he shouldn’t have been the “bigger person” in that situation and one year doesn’t really mean much when you’re that young and that hurt, I realized he’s actually a good and hard-working kid and I’m sorry for giving him so much shade. Also I really like his snark and sass, but that might not even be canon at this point tbh

Why I don’t: I’m still sort of irked by him beating down on Kagami because he was envious/mad, but I realized the aspect of that situation that Really got to me was how devoted Kagami still was to him after all that. That devotion was what felt toxic, nothing that Himuro actually did to him.

Favorite episode (scene if movie): the time they met up w Kagami just to exchange a dramatic socially distancing bro fist and a few encouraging words.... gays be Like That

Favorite season/movie: I really didn’t mind s3 Himuro

Favorite line: apparently he’s said some iconic stuff that I don’t remember (and my sources don’t seem really legit) but I’m gonna say “let’s see you become number 1, bro” because again, that’s just so ridiculous and endearing. On one hand he really went from loathing Kagami to rooting for him and wanting him to reach his full potential and on the other, honey ur  like 17 stop speaking like That

Favorite outfit: his knitted V-neck sweaters and the black coat with the white fur.... boy’s got all the fashion sense that’s missing from Kagami

OTP: can I say.....AoHimu asdfh I ship 3/4 of these characters with Aomine what does that say about me

Brotp: KagaHimu. They can be sweet, but I’ve only ever seen Jake write them really well

Head Canon: I’ve been entertaining the idea of....trans Himuro.....

Unpopular opinion: everyone thinks that Kagami is the violent kid and Himuro is the chill, sweet child who’s somehow wound up with this mess of a fiery tiger, but it’s actually Himuro who taught Kagami how to fight and Kagami learned quite a lot of aggression from him

A wish: I feel like Himuro should’ve gotten a separate episode to explore his thoughts, feelings and past. He had so much potential as a character Is2g

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: him quitting basketball would fucking destroy me. I’d be devastated for others too, but it would really pull on my heartstrings if he just dropped the only thing he’s been so passionate about.

5 words to best describe them: gender-non-conforming emo child

My nickname for them: Himu, Tatsuya, Tatsu

[startwithbrooklyn]

THE GREAT ND REWATCH OF 2021 / SEPTEMBER 28-29, 2019 // the bonny scot

posting this a day later than normal because this is one of the rare episodes that shows a passage of time from one day to the next yayy love that for them

-wonder what filming these beginning sexy scenes is like for them in real life

-sooooo can lucy see nancys sexy dream? is she judging? does this mean she likes nancy with owen or nick more? or is she trying to tell nancy that her sex dreams are irrelevant to the mystery at hand and she needs to focus?

-seeing people in the ✨prison chair✨: gomber, carson, karen (voting for josh s3 just saying)

-completely ignores carson's question about herself typical nance

-"or maybe i did stumble across a knife" its like hes trying to make the case against him look plausible while attempting to maintain innocence. this is a slippery slope for carson to try and encourage her to keep her pacified + hide the truth while also trying to keep her from getting involved bc hudsons

-"genetics gets you in the door" aaaaand then she walks in to everetts office to meet him and crashes their family dinner

-ok who tf is dawn and why is she in charge here

-this guidance counselor of nicks is my favorite person

-"i admire your allergy to pleasantries" bess and nancy both have reveals to big families but nancy does not have the graceful, accepting reveal to her rich family like bess does at this lunch. nancys reveal is messy, cold, bloodstained and sticky-fingered, not nice in any way whatsoever. and this little chat with everett (bit of a parallel to lucy's) just highlights how nancy is always bad at bargaining with her grandparents*- always trying to fight on their level but giving up her equal hand bc she doesnt know how to hide it when they bring up something she doesnt know. like confronting celia at the masque: she was so confident with her theory and what she knew, but then we got a "what does that mean?" like. the instant you say that, you lose. and she walked right into the "yes i do have someone, hes in jail" 🤦🏼‍♀️ even in the car with ryan at the end of s1, he literally just fucking leaves her there. like 🤷🏼‍♀️ what did u think was gonna happen sis?? for all she can predict how past things lead to present circumstances shes fucking awful at seeing the direct future *(grandparents except for patrice bc her dementia makes her inaccessable)

-lmaooooo this awko ass portrait...i get the empty space is for nance but who on earth thought this was a good pic??

-LISBETH 🥺💙

-"will u help the claw for me?" george struggles financially to keep her livelihood while nancy is somehow shown as being taken care of even when her parent is incarcerated; both nancy and george live in single parent homes now with mention of both medical debt and george being breadwinner yet nancy has no struggles while george does. (i wonder if ryan had been able to help george here how the story would have changed)

-"when it comes to following people around without their knowledge or consent i am somewhat of a repeat offender" 😂😂😂

-"he wasnt endgame after all" BESS lmaoooo

-"...okay." lmaoooo i fuckin love owen

-i was hoping the girls' faces would be more shocked like with a glance to owen but they just....werent

-"we're the good guys" <---- this statement is soooo interesting in terms of how they structure the show and how the characters see themselves (its an interesting contrast with the more definitive good vs evil with things that are both clearly good and clearly evil but theres also a lot of moral grey area here, the show is kinda swamped in it. are nancy and crew the good guys? are they the bad guys in someone else's story? concerns.)

-"i'd call it more than just stuff" like why did u concede that??? and then the shit about oof that didnt sound like a compliment lmaoooooo why does she suck at arguing?? she and owen wouldnt work long term bc theyre so similar (as mentioned later on)

-i LOVE george slowly falling in love with nick here- hence how upset she gets when nick bails on her for nancy later (which is totally justified!!!)

-i am LIVING for the little nod this driver guy gives bess when she turns back around all nervous 😂

-"i do like buying things" i would so say that too tbh

-"you'd have plenty to talk about" LMFAOOOOOOO SHE KNOWS "marvins dont marry drivers" so diana is totally fine with the gay its just the poor she has a problem with 😂💙fuckin love that

-love how nancy just casually ruins everything for nick/george lmaooo

-"i have seen you at your best, nancy, and there is nothing like it." 🥴😳 i love this still-in-love look nancy gives him thats so strong he had to change the subject

-so is haunting time 11 pm? from that clock of bashiir's?

-how do NO neighbors notice this fucking water and shit

-these are TOTALLY AWFUL fake screams from the bonny scot crew 😭

-"i know well enough not to get involved when he's in play" both carson and ryan avoid engaging with everett even though nancy is willing to do so armed with less info and more balls/ but "could i trust him" and ryan says yes lmaooooo NO honey + that makes ryan 0/2 for helping the girls when they ask this ep

-"find a project of your own" and he does, with his youth center 🙏🏻💙 what s2 foreshadowing!

-"god i wish i still drank" 😂😂😂

-"she is darling." 💙👌🏻

-okay wtf is mirror bay??

-i really wonder about the extent of celia x sebastians relationship here. did she truly care about him or was it just secret and exciting sex? also would love more hints of diana vs celia moments like these. celia doesnt even look upset. i mean shes had time to deal but like wtf. and who exactly is sebastian to diana? not her husband? like damn what if he was. somehow i doubt she'd talk about him diddling celia if diana was disrespected also

-i wonder if celia being so invested in dna testing nancy was bc everrett dna tested ryan to make sure he was his bc of sebastian / other men (which would be totally valid on his part!! but wouldnt it be funny as fuck if ryan wasnt his 😂)

-what a neat hiding place in this frame lmaooo who put that in for them tho? like how do u go about ordering that

-"you certainly are your fathers daughter" this quote is doubly ironic and foreshadowy bc theyre referencing carson here as being a useful hudson attaché but nancy is playing everett just like ryan played celia about putting his house up (but TRIPLY ironic bc carson pulls off the long con of hiding nancy from the hudsons right under their noses this whole time!) the one time nancy is successful against them

-that bess/lisbeth look while lisbeth does something badass (+diana reassessing now that lisbeth has been revealed to be useful)

-"almost as fun as a real fight" why do i believe him? lmaoooo a bit weird that he would enjoy a fight w a partner, but i also think this is an acknowledgement of nancy being an "opponent" who exists at his level. but i also love the "let me take you out" as a direct mirror of her relationship with nick, where she avoids the public acknowledgment/"going out" but prefers the more subtle/hidden arrangements of staying in. but as shown with later eps, owen is way more capable of meeting nancy where shes at, which is so important to her + the only way of getting close to nancy. (the only foil is ace who somehow is able to do both)

-"not always about a guy" <---- this could have been such a powerful statement if the show had thought having nancy end up alone/choose herself instead of pitting her between love interests (nick, owen, gil, even potentially ace, in only 2 seasons) was a more worthy stance to take ; as an aro/ace person i cant tell you how much i would kill to see just one female protag choose herself over a man. and its more realistic to end up alone than have a happy ending anyway, for all that these shows try to be as "real" and gritty grimdark as possible

-"is that what you want?" this is an interesting question to his mother- like maybe he senses her unhappiness? combined with his issues with his father- still trying to look out for his mom? either way it's sweet. (it could also potentially work as foreshadowing of something happening to her, but i think that was played with but then diverted when it was revealed who really killed her) "i think its time i steer this ship" still kind of patriarchal tho. i get that its him coming into his own as a dad technically but still. i also like how he calls her "mother" and not mom

-love that old white people thumbs up at george asking about his clams 👍🏻

-okay fuck dawn tho lmfaoooo

-"stressful dinner huh?" 😂 i fucking love lisbeth so much why didnt they bring her back (wouldnt it be Fucking Hilarious if they brought lisbeth back to bounce bess on her expired visa since the marvins kicked her out and didnt fix it lmaoooooo)

-BESS IS A TOP lmaooooooo i fuckin knew it

-nick says "you can pay me back" wonder if thats gonna come back in s3 considering their "marital problems" (also, those bonds are sosus lmfaoooo if any single person cashing those was looked at sideways they'd confess in 2 seconds that some random guy is handing out bearer bonds they dont even make anymore with absolutely zero proof as to how he got them)

-"you wanna finish what you started?" 👀 (dont mind if i do)

-"i need my dad back" parallels s2 when she asks him to come home

-parent politics: "you are taking your life in your hands / no, i'm putting it in yours" vs "i know well enough not to get involved when hes in play" both carson and ryan try to dissuade nancy from pursuing her pulling this con on everett but go about it different ways: carson is wildly concerned with nancys physical wellbeing but ryan appears to be leaning more towards weighing the odds for her/ like a "you cant win so cut your losses/dont try" scenario which interestingly might have more weight with nancy; its easy for her to brush aside carson's worrying like second nature but nancy has been established to be a determined winner, and ryan speaks to her here like shes a beginners luck prodigy at a blackjack table by encouraging her to keep her record clean by not dealing in this next round. of course she herself admits shes incapable of not dealing in ie "you know me better than that" but i have lots more thoughts on how effective ryans approaches to nancy can be sometimes (saving for the reveal ep 🙏🏻)

-wonder what all carson knows about the hudsons? + that look on his face when he hangs up... wonder if he was just lying to her about knowing anything or just ashamed at having to admit bad things hes done for them

-love nick & bashiir waiting together 🙏🏻💙+ nicks very strong and pointed "good night" as a means of ending his convo w nancy on his terms (gotta reinforce those boundaries man!)

and lastly

-celia + that gossip girl moment when she just throws the whole phone away 😂(wonder if she was just talking to "gus" or whoever that guy was. keep forgetting the bobbseys' dad is in prison too, wonder if he'll feature in s3)

[jawabear]

(4) A Lesson In Want (Maxwell Lord x Reader)

A/N: Here is part 4 of the story. its a little long so I’m sorry about that but Max is really cute I swear. I don't really know how to summarise this part because quite a lot happens.

Genre: Fluff, Smut

Warnings: Smut, slight choking, sub!Max, Pedro Pascal comes with his own warning

Summary: Together again

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8 / Part 9 / Epilogue

She stood in the mirror looking at the dress she was wearing. It was somewhat similar to the one she had worn before. Although, it was a little more concealing then the other. The mirror its self was dirty but she didn’t really care, it just matched how she saw herself, dirty. Her job wasn’t exactly the most respectable profession but she felt she wasn’t made for anything more.

The room was dark, but she was used to it, somehow accustom to living in the darkness, a small light above her that shone a dim orange light through the room. It was cold in her room, nothing more then an attic in a giant tall building that was just as dark and cold through out its lower levels. She often wondered if everyone else who lived in the building was used to the cold as she was, but she never thought to ask, it was rare she would see anyone else anyway, she was professional and couldn’t deal with others, aside from the girl who she shared her room with, although at times she was completely unbearable.

It had been weeks since she had last seen Max, since their wonderful night together. And since that night, she had been horrible distracted. She couldn’t do anything without seeing his face or hearing his voice in her mind. She could remember the face Max made when he looked at her when he saw her in that dress when she pulled him away to please him, he made her feel so special. And their night together was just the greatest night of her life. She wanted nothing more in that moment then to fall back into his strong chest whilst his arms wrap around her and he whispers to her how beautiful she looked. Her eyes slid shut and she held a dreamy smile on her face.

She could practically hear his hushed voice in her ear as she wrapped her arms around herself, trying to replicate his warmth. She could hear his low whispers of praise. She could feel his soft lips pressing against her neck. She was once again in front of his grand fire, the heat from the flames was no match to what he gave her. His living room was bright but his eyes were brighter. His hands all over her body, caressing her skin with his rough fingers, his lips against every part of her making her feel as if she were dreaming. And she was.

“Having fun?” came a teasing voice from behind her. (Y/N) was pulled from her daydream back into the harsh reality of her life. Back into the cold dark room. She saw her friend Mia standing behind her reaching for a file. “You know, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were in love” she smirked looking at the file.

“I don’t do love” (Y/N) argued firmly as she straightened her dress. She then stopped again and her friend came and stood next to her, looking at (Y/N) through the mirror.

“What is it about him that’s gotten you like this? You’ve done this a loads of times, this has never happened before. So he must be special, there must be something about him” (Y/N) didn’t answer and just walked away from the mirror over to her desk, she picked up the file that Mia had picked up moments before, which read “MAXWELL LORD” in bold black letters.

Mia let out a soft laugh from behind her “is it his money?” She asked “he could be the richest one you’ve ever been after”

“You know I don’t care about money” (Y/N) muttered. She opened the file and looked at the picture that was clipped inside along with pages of writing that she couldn’t be bothered to read. It was probably all lies anyway. About how vile and self-centred he was, he had proven to her that he was more then the news made him out to be. He was a sweet, caring man.

“So what is it then? His status? His connections?”

“He’s...he’s nice to me”

“He’s nice to you?”

“I’ve done this so many times...giving myself to all of those dirty men for the sake of completing the mission and after all these years, he’s the first person to ask me what I want. No one else has treated me with such care, to them I was an object, a pretty face, but to him...I’m more then that. He’s gentle and kind. He said he likes me. He said I’m the woman of his dreams...” she let a soft smile form on her lips as her fingers gently grazed over his picture “he said that he didn’t believe I was real...”

“He’s just another rich guy looking for a woman to hold on his arm to impress people, (Y/N)” Mia told her.

“You don’t know anything about him” (Y/N) scoffed defensively. “He’s not like everyone else Mia...he’s different”

“He’s different” Mia repeated “there’s no such thing as different. But I will say one thing, he must be quite something you get you in this state. You’re usually the most professional of us. You seem a little distracted all the time, thinking of Mr Lord no doubt. If he’s so different, maybe after this mission you should try it with him, leave this and be with him”

“You say that as if they won’t want me to kill him at the end” (Y/N) said and closed the file “Besides, I can’t see that he’ll welcome me with open arms when he find out who I am”

“If you think that, then maybe he isn’t so different after all”

As much as (Y/N) hated to admit it, Mia was right. If, one day, she told Max who she was, what her job was, and he hated her for it, then he wasn’t the caring person she had thought. But she didn’t want to think he wasn’t, he had given her no reason to suspect that at the first sign of trouble, he would drop her and move on, but she couldn’t deny that that thought was eating away at her mind constantly since meeting him. The thought that he would leave her and she would be alone again.

She quickly shook her head of the thought and grabbed her shoes, quickly pulling them on and storming to the door. “Are you ready?” She asked her friend, more like ordered.

Mia laughed and turned to face her holding out her arms to the side “what do you think? Can you recognise me?”

“I can when you open your mouth” (Y/N) muttered before leaving the room.

The gathering was a charity event at a local history museum. Max didn’t really try his hand in history that much, although he was quite fond of Greek literature, he loved to read about the gods and myths of the ancient world, the love and the tragedy. The museum needed extra funding and what better way to source money then to drain it from the richest people in the city. Maxwell Lord being one of them.

Max was used to the deal by now. Getting hounded by wealthy men and women who all want to flaunt how rich they were to each other, a test to see who had the biggest ego. Talking rubbish about history that they didn’t understand or care to look into. They would try and show off to him about how much they knew, Max was half tempted to correct them but he thought it was funny to hear them big themselves up.

Max tried to play along as best he could, nodding along to whatever they said but he had to admit that his mind was elsewhere. It had been weeks since he had heard anything of (Y/N). And he missed her everyday he was apart from her. He desperately wanted to see her again. He didn’t care what happened between them, whether they return to his home to recreated their night or simply just talk. He didn’t care, being in her presence alone would be enough for him. He had wanted nothing more then to see her smile, hear her voice, look into her beautiful eyes. Just to be near her again.

He figured if he were to see her again, it would be tonight. So he dressed up smarter then he usually would, not that he was ever scruffy looking. He wore he best and most expensive black suit. A crisp white dress shirt, black tie, shining shoes and his hair slicked back. He definitely dressed to impress this evening.

“I’m starting to get the feeling you aren’t a fan of these gatherings Mr Lord” the young gentleman in front of him, who had introduced himself as James Felis said pulling Max’s attention from looking for her to him. He was a clean looking man, clean shaven, dark eyes and dark hair, quite tall but a little shorter then Max. He was new to the business world, his name only just starting to get know. Max had spoken with him a few times at past events, he seemed nice enough, more genuine then most which Max found surprising due to his young age. Max was very arrogant when he was younger, figuring that’s how he would get what he want. He had however mellowed out over the course of his business.

“What makes you say that?” Max asked even though he was right. Max took a sip of his drink and tried to focus on James but him mind betrayed him, her beautiful face was at the forefront of his mind and he couldn’t stop his eyes from wavering around the room they were in. The ancient history wing of the museum, standing beside a painting that depicted the Trojans brining the famed wooden horse into the city walls of Troy that was soon to be destroyed by the Greeks that were hiding inside its belly.

“Every time we speak, your mind seems to be elsewhere. Either your looking for a quick escape or my voice just bores you”

Max let out a stiff chuckle “no, it’s not either really. Just...admiring the outfit choices, always different and of course be art work beside us” he said pointing to the painting with his glass.

“Looking for someone in particular?” James teased as he took a sip of his own drink. “I’m surprised you are not yet in a relationship. Women must be lining up to get a taste of Maxwell Lord. Can’t be difficult for you to find a partner”

“No, you’re right. But, I haven’t found the right one” Max shrugged. He had found the right one. He wasn’t sure if he should admit it, she was so secretive about herself, Max wasn’t sure if he should reveal their little ordeal to a stranger.

“Never would’ve taken you for the sentimental type. Thought you would be like any other rich man”

“And what’s that?”

“Well, you know, sleeping around. Waking up to a different woman in your bed every morning”

“Maybe when I was a little younger” he admitted “but I haven’t done that for a long time. Thought maybe it was time to really start looking. Is that the lifestyle you live by?”

James laughed and shook his head “no, there are a few occasions when I will bring a woman home with me to bed, but not every night, like you, I am also looking for the right woman”

“Excuse me gentlemen” came a soft voice as a woman with fiery red hair slipped into the conversation. Max’s eyes fell on her.

“Hello~” James drew out “and who might you be?”

“Scarlett Diaz” she introduced with an innocent smile holding out her hand to him. He took it and brought it to his lips pressing a soft kiss to her knuckles and winked at her making her giggle “and who might you be?”

“James Felis” he introduced. She then turned to Max. She had unreal blue eyes. Her lips bright red which matched both her hair and her dress.

“And you sir?” She asked in a smooth voice that reminded him of (Y/N). Their voices were almost identical. But it wasn’t her he was looking at. Maybe he was just too obsessed with her that now any woman sounded like her.

“Maxwell Lord” he greeted. He wasn’t as gentlemanly as James had been, opting for just shaking her hand instead.

“Of course, I should’ve know. I’ve heard all about you in the news. Quite the name you’ve made for yourself Mr Lord, I’m impressed. I myself am not much for the spotlight like you seem to be”

“Really?” He said. He looked her up and down and gave her a soft smile “you seem to stand out in a crowd. I’ve never seen hair so red before”

She smiled to him and brushed a strand behind her ear “yes, well, we all need to be a bit adventurous with how we look sometimes. Much better I think then wearing simple black or white. Adds a little colour to people’s lives. Wouldn’t you agree Mr Lord?”

“I would agree” he nodded “although red would not be my colour of choice”

“It would be mine” James chipped in, but he seems to be ignored for the moment.

“And what would your colour of choice be?” She asked him but didn’t give him time to answer “gold perhaps? Or maybe you like a woman in (f/c)”

Max was a little shocked at her words. Confused as well. It could’ve just been a lucky guess, but he felt it was something more then that, as if she knew. “Yes,” he mumbled “I think (f/c) would be favourable to me” he looked away from the woman and took a large swig of his drink finishing it off “excuse me” he nodded curtly to the two in front of him before leaving. He was heading towards the bar to get a drink but something in his mind had stopped him and told him to look right.

And he was gazing into the most beautiful eyes anyone could ever look into.

She was there.

And she was wearing (f/c).

He noticed her give him a soft smile before she walked behind a wall going deeper into the exhibit. He was quick to follow after her, not much caring for another drink now, he wasn’t going to loose her. At some point he had put down his empty glass but he couldn’t recall where.

He rounded the corner and saw her standing alone staring at a painting holding a half filled glass of champagne in her hands.

As he had the night she had first touched him, he straightened himself, regaining his composure before approaching her. He stood next to her but keeping a slight distance, trying his best to resist the urge to wrap his arms around her.

“Beautiful piece” she said not looking at him.

“It is. Are you familiar with the story of Dido?” He asked her, his eyes on her.

“The queen of Carthage. She was shot by Cupid and made to fall in love with the Trojan leader Aeneas by the queen of the gods, Juno’s orders. But he had to leave to found Rome and left her alone in Carthage. So hopelessly in love with him by the gods hands she throws herself onto Aeneas’ sword and dies” she summarised.

“Did you study the stories?”

“Only to make conversation” she shrugged making his laugh softly

“It’s nice to see you again (Y/N)”

“And you Mr Lord”

“Mr Lord?” He repeated raising an eyebrow at her. She turned to face him, taking a teasing sip of her drink.

“Is that not your name?” She asked him “I would’ve thought you would prefer me to call you by your title rather then your first name at such a formal event. Maybe we should keep the use of your first name for when we’re alone”

“Will we be alone again anytime soon?”

“Perhaps” she nodded

“I’ve really missed you”

“You have?”

“You sound surprised” he chuckled “did you think I would forget you?”

“Not exactly” she said “I just thought you would be done with me”

“Clearly you are not done with me” he retorted “if you were, I don’t think you would’ve made yourself known to me tonight”

“I guess you’re right”

“Just so you know, our night together didn’t mean I was done with you, I meant what I said (Y/N), I like you, more than just a sexual liking”

She gave him a light chuckle and sipped her drink again “and I like you too Mr Lord”

“Will you let me take you out to dinner?”

“No” she answered firmly

“Why not?” She paused for a moment “is it because of your job?”

“Partly. But also because I hate people”

“But yet you come to things like this, places full of probably the worst kind of people in this city”

“I know, but I never talk to any of them, I’m very good at hiding. I could stand in the middle of the room and still no one would pay any attention”

“Which I still find hard to believe. Someone as beautiful as you must’ve caught the eye of someone”

She smirked over to him “clearly I have, so what is it about me Mr Lord that interested you to take notice of me? Was it simply just my looks?” She was testing him at this point, seeing if Mia’s theory was right.

“You can’t blame me for being drawn to a woman as beautiful as you. But it wasn’t just your looks, it was how easily you managed to slip away in a split second. One minuet you would be in front of me, the next you would be gone. I was interested to know, as I’ve told you before, if you were real. I’m interested by you’re aura, you have the ability to disappear but then be so obvious like you are now” he brushed a piece of hair behind her ear “there’s something about you that draws me to you but I can’t tell what it is. Maybe it’s your eyes, you’re beautiful eyes, or maybe it’s simply that I don’t understand you, and I wish too”

“What about me do you wish to understand?”

“Who you are”

“I can’t tell you that”

“I know” he nodded “I respect that”

A silence fell over them as they both stared at the painting in front of them. It was a peaceful silence though, they could hear the busy chatter of the guests in the other room but it was mostly muffled but the wall that separated them.

“There’s a woman here tonight who is a lot like you” he said “she looks nothing like you but she has the same feel about her”

“What’s her name?” She asked him.

“I think she said it was Scarlett? Scarlett Diaz”

“Can’t say I’ve ever heard of her before” (Y/N) shrugged

“Well, she seemed to talk the same as you. But maybe that’s just my mind playing tricks on me”

“Maybe”

“If it’s not to much trouble, would you allow me to take you back to my house?”

“What would we get up to there?”

“Anything you want to. It been a while since we’ve seen each other and I’d rather spend time together when I know you can’t slip away from me into a crowd”

“Very well” she nodded with a smile as she finished off her drink “I’ll meet you outside Mr Lord” she held up her glass to him and slipped by him, her hand gliding across his back.

He smiled as he watched her slide into the crowd, but this time he wasn’t worried about loosing her. He quickly made his own way through the crowd outside where his sleek black car was waiting. He leant against the car and looked to the entrance of the museum waiting for her.

It didn’t take long for her to emerge from the entrance. Looking like a queen, a goddess from the stories he loved to read, to be honest, he would be surprised if she was in fact a goddess in disguise. She seemed to glow as she walked carefully down the steps to the museum, holding her dress up slightly to ensure she didn’t trip.

He held his hand out to her and helped her down the last few steps and opened up the car door for her “after you my lady” he said with a polite smile, she couldn’t help but blush as she got into his car. He slid into the seat next to her and told his driver to take them back to his house.

He couldn’t help but look at her the entire way, how radiant she looked, the way she gazed out of the window, her eyes every so often catching the warm orange glow of the streetlights they passed. He couldn’t resist touching her anymore, it was warm gesture and it sent her heart into over drive.

He rested his hand on her knee. Her gazed was pulled from out the window to his hand and she smiled “you look so beautiful tonight (Y/N)” he complimented.

“Thank you Max” she said.

“Back to first name basis?” He asked with a soft smirk.

“Well, we are alone” she shifted slightly so her body was now facing him, her hand running up and down his arm. “You look a lot smarter than usual. Is this a new suit?”

“Newish” she shrugged “I’ve only worn it once, it’s my best suit. Only for the most special occasions”

“Did you dress up all nice and fancy for me baby?” She asked him in a seductive whisper “because I don’t think that event classes as a special occasion”

“Wanted to look my best for you baby” he said in a broken whisper. She looked to where the drive would be and saw a dark screen that blocked them from him.

“How long till we get there?” She asked him. Max looked out of the window.

“Maybe about...20 minuets?” He guessed. He heard the click of her seatbelt undo and she was quickly on his lap, straddling his waist.

“Do you think 20 minuets is enough time?” She asked as she bit her bottom lip. He nodded rapidly and swallowed thickly, his hands coming to rest on her hips. “I don’t want to make a mess on your fancy suit”

“I don’t care. You could fucking rip it to pieces if you wanted to” He panted slightly to her, he leaned forwards to kiss her but she smirked and pulled back.

“Well I don’t want to do that baby” she chuckled, she reached between their bodies and unbuckled his belt and unzipped his trousers. She reached into his boxers and pulled out his length. She stroked him a few times and he shuddered, his eyes never leaving hers.

She slowly sunk down his body and ran her tongue over the head of his dick “(Y-Y/N)” he whimpered. She then licked up his entire length and he let out a pathetic noise that was sent straight to her core. She hummed happily against him and took as much as she could of him into her mouth, what she couldn’t fit in her mouth she pumped with her hand. He whimpered and whined pathetically as he thrust his hips up into her slightly, his head falling back and his eyes sliding shut. “(Y/N)” he moaned, his fingers sliding into her hair. “I want to be inside you” he muttered.

She immediately pulled him out of her mouth, a small bit of drool sliding down her chin. She got back onto his lap and he lifted his thumb and wiped her saliva away from her chin. He brought his thumb to his lips and slipped it past them, sucking her drool off him.

She smiled to him and bit her bottom lip “such a good boy for me aren’t you” she praised lightly. He nodded and removed his thumb from her lips. She moved one of her hands under her dress between their bodies and moved her panties to one side and took him back into her hand. She aligned him with her entrance and slowly sunk down onto him. He let out a harsh breath when she did and he gripped her hips tightly.

(Y/N) began bouncing on him almost immediately, Max’s eyes grew heavy and eventually closed as his head fell backwards again “oh baby, you feel so good” he groaned. She hummed in response and placed her lips to his neck, sucking on the skin between his neck and his jaw. His finger tips dug into her hips as he moaned out her name multiple times, repeating it as if it were some kind of chant.

Her hands slid up to his hair and she grabbed the strands and pulled his head up “I want you to look at me while I fuck you” she ordered in a whispered to him. His eyes opened and met with her seductive glare that made him shake and whimper.

“Will...will you choke me?” He asked quietly, his cheeks flushing bright red at his request, he felt so small but he loved it, he loved the dominance she had over him in that moment. He loved the way she looked at him, the way she spoke to him, she way she felt around him. “P-please?”

He looked at her with wide eyes, puppy eyes. Big, brown and beautiful. Pleading her to grant him his wish and she was more then happy to comply, she just hoped that she wouldn’t be too hard on him. She moved one of her hands from his hair and wrapped her fingers around his neck, applying light pressure. “H-harder” he breathed when she pulled his hair.

She did as he ask, her fingers getting tighter around his neck as she rolled her hips against her. His moan came out broken and it made her groan. She could feel his dick twitching inside her and she decided to go faster. He was struggling to keep his eyes open, the pleasure and lack of air was making his head spin in the best possible way, he couldn’t help but smile as she fucked him.

“You like that?” She smirked into his ear, her heavy breaths going straight through him “you like to be dominated? You like having my hand around you neck?”

“Yes...yes I do (Y/N)” he gasped and nodded “oh fuck, I’m gonna come” he moaned shakily. He moved one hand from her hips and grabbed her wrist, pushing it into his neck. “Fuck! (Y/N)!” He yelled as he came suddenly inside of her, his hips bucked wildly up into, his body shaking. The warmth of his come and the sight of him falling apart was enough to send her over the edge, her walls clenching around him making his head fall back.

She removed her hand from his neck and noticed it was slightly red but she could tell it wouldn’t stay like that for very long. She slowly slipped off him and tucked him back into his boxers and tidied him up a bit, he was too fucked out to do it himself. She sat beside him again and slowly ran her hand up and down his heaving chest while he came down from his high.

He let out a low breath and turned his head to look at her, his eyes opened and they were blown black with desire. She smiled at him “did you like that Max?” She teased.

“Yes” he nodded “I really did...I’ve never...never felt so good...”

“I’m glad you liked it baby” she leaned forwards and pressed her lips to his in a gentle kiss. He took her hand in his, interlacing their fingers together when he pulled away to look out of the car window. She looked at their joined hands and her heart swelled. Such a small action, but it meant the world to her.

“I think we’re nearly there” he said quietly, his breath slowly coming back to him. She hummed in acknowledgement and lifted their joined hands to her lips and pressed a gentle kiss to his knuckles. He gave her hand a gentle squeeze and smiled to her. “How about, when we get back, we take a bath together?” He offered. She shuffled closer to him, bringing their joined hands to rest on her lap while her head rested on his shoulder.

“I’d like that” she hummed. He pressed a soft kiss to her head and they sat in a comfortable silence for the remaining few minuets of the car journey.

15/04/20

[trashyswitch]

Relationship Goals

Henry Emily and William Afton have been best friends for as long as they can remember. So, when William starts acting like a drama queen, Henry contemplates either enjoying the rare moment, or wrecking him...

Eventually, Henry finds a good compromise for both options...

This takes place WAY before the killings at Five Nights at Freddy's. I wanted to establish the Men's relationship in a very...fluffy light...

Hope you enjoy!

Henry Emily and William Afton have been the best of friends for as long as they could remember. They spent High School together, being 2 teenagers on top of the world.

Henry was an artist and a tradesmen. He could often be seen taking visual art classes AND Mechanical Engineering classes in the same year, for multiple years in a row! His favorite past time was tinkering with any spare parts with a toolbox by his side. When he finished, Henry would run test after test to make sure there were no flaws. He was very perseverant, and often refused to give up on a project he had worked so hard on. Heck, it was sometimes impossible to leave his project for a few minutes to go eat or take a bathroom break! But, Henry eventually learned that taking breaks can be good. It allowed Henry the time to think about what to do next, and allowed Henry to look at his project in a new light. Unsurprisingly, Henry kept up his passion as a career choice. But long before moving onto college, Henry met William.

Now, William Afton was an anti-social kind of teen. William was one of those 'non-scholarly' kinda kids. He was very good with numbers and received semi-good grades, but didn't really bother putting the hard work in. William understood high school life to be the time to 'have fun while you can' and often told Henry to 'loosen up and have fun once in a while'. The two best friends were polar opposite in that regard, but managed to balance each other out. William had shoulder-length hair that would often be dyed with a tinge of purple. He didn't care very much for piercings and tattoos, but loved painting his nails black and wearing purple clothing as much as possible. You could really tell what William's favorite color was back in the day...

Back then, they were just kids trying to find themselves in the world. Who could've possibly known they would end up here: Working together on an Animatronic-filled dining area for families, in the middle of the crazy 80's?! It was absolutely unheard of to have robotic animals in dining rooms. But, with Henry's engineering degree and William's business degree, Freddy Fazbear's Pizza had become a successful company! To celebrate, the boys went out for some drinks at a local bar.

Months later, William and Henry were working in their double duo office (an office with 2 people sharing the space), and having a bit of fun while they worked.

William was filling out some paperwork on a clipboard, and was losing focus rather quickly. It was exhausting trying to work on such paperwork at 7:00 at night. Henry was doing more of the fun stuff. He was working on a tiny version of the Freddy Fazbear animatronic. William proceeded to watch for a few minutes, before getting an idea.

"Hey Henry! Look!" William said as he opened up a drawer and pulled another mini figure out of his drawer.

"One second..."Henry told him.

William took advantage of the delay, and started contorting the arm to face in front. Next, William moved the fingers into a fist, and flipped up one of the fingers to the air. "Okay. Look." William told him, holding up the mini figure.

"I'm busy. One more minute..." Henry told William.

William rolled his eyes. Not wanting to wait for him, William decided to place the mini figure on the ground. With the figure facing the right way, William clicked a button on the back and let it walk itself over to Henry.

The Bonnie mini figure started walking its choppy little legs over to Henry's direction. It took a couple minutes but soon enough, the Bonnie mini figure hit his foot, getting his attention. Henry looked down at the floor and rolled his eyes at the sight. The Bonnie mini figure was leaning against Henry's shoe, still walking on the spot as if it wasn't being stopped at all. Henry bent down and picked up the figure, turning it off as he looked at it.

It took a second to process it, but Henry noticed something...odd...about Bonnie's hand: The right hand appeared to have been reassembled into the shape of a middle finger. Henry let out a short titter in response. "Really Will?" Henry asked.

William only proceeded to burst out laughing at the reaction he got from his only friend. On one hand, Henry was mentally rolling his eyes at William's immaturity. At the same time though, Henry felt playful enough to mirror some of William's playfulness. So, Henry took the other hand, and contorted it to form another middle finger. When it was ready, Henry placed it on the ground and clicked the button to start it up.

A few mechanical noises and beeps later, the mini figure, along with its middle fingers, were now walking up to William's desk. William had heard the sound of the mini figure walking, and decided to look up just in time to see a smiling purple Bonnie, flipping him off with two delightful-looking middle fingers.

William bursted out laughing at the stupid humor. "That awesome." William muttered before getting up from his seat. William bent down and grabbed the Bonnie figure. He turned it off, and placed it onto the desk in front of him. "This glorious Bonnie, has earned its place on the Freddy Fazbear's Hall of Fame. A beautiful, family-friendly, fuck you!" William joked.

Henry bursted out laughing. "Oh my gosh...You're seriously not gonna-aaaaaand you have...great...Our business is gonna get sued, because SoMeOnE couldn't keep their inappropriate jokes to themselves!" Henry reacted sarcastically.

"Hey! I'll...hide it during the day...I'll only bring it out when it's just us." William reassured.

Henry sighed, but nodded his head. "...Fine." Henry concluded before returning to his mechanics.

Another 20 minutes had passed, with no contact between the two co-workers. Henry had just connected the hand wires to the arm wires, and was beginning to push the wires inside and clip the hand in place.

*click* That was hand #1.

All of a sudden, Henry had felt a quick hit from something super light. At first, Henry couldn't even tell if something hit him! The only thing he heard in the room, was the sounds of William throwing away paper. So, with a quick swipe of the hand against the back of his head, Henry returned back to his figure.

A few minutes later, Henry felt another light hit. This time, Henry felt the back of his head, and looked down at his feet. There, laying on the ground, was a crumpled up paper. Henry picked it up, uncrumpled it, and read the message:

~Hi ;)

Henry rolled his eyes and threw the paper aside, before returning to the Freddy mini figure.

Soon, the papers started hitting his back and head more...frequently. It became very apparent that William was the one doing it. He threw paper, after paper, after paper, after paper, after-

It just never ended! By the time Henry had even considered telling him off, William had thrown almost 30 paper balls at the man!

Henry turned himself around to face William. "Will, I swear to God-" Henry started scolding, before being interrupted by a paper ball to the face.

"What? Am I annoying you yet?" William asked, before throwing another paper ball at his face. "How about now?" William taunted, pulling out another piece of paper and crumpling it up. "Am I annoying you yet?" William asked before throwing the crumpled paper at Henry's face. "Tell me, my lovely co-worker-" William taunted as he crumpled up yet ANOTHER paper. "Am I annoying you yet?" William asked one last time, before throwing it at Henry's face.

This time though, Henry caught the crumpled paper like a baseball with his right hand.

Henry looked at the crumpled paper in his hand for a minute...When he felt ready, Henry threw the paper back at William. William dodged the paper, and began cheering and taunting him. "Hey look at that! You missed!" William mocked. Henry, without breaking eye contact with William, bent down and picked up another crumpled paper. With the taunting starting to get to him, Henry threw the crumpled paper at William with all his might. William jumped out of the way again, and started laughing at him.

"HA! You missed me!"

In reaction to that, Henry began picking up all the paper balls and throwing them at William.

"Whoa! Look at that slide, though!"

"Wheeee! This is kinda fun!"

"WHOA- That was clo- Ow..."

"Now, now WAIT A SECOND- You're not allowed to walk closer! That's against the rules!"

Henry guffawed at the statement. "What rules?" Henry replied, before continuing to throw his paper balls at a closer distance.

"Alright, smart ass, fine. Do what you- HEY! Okay! Okay, I'm sorry! Stop- Ow! Dude! Cut it out- Aah! Knohohock ihihit ohohoff! Hehehenry! Plehehehease!" William reacted, getting more playful and giggly the longer it went on.

Okay, fine. I'll stop." Henry decided before walking back to his desk. William's face went from confusion, right to disappointment in a matter of seconds. That wasn't what he meant...He meant stop throwing the papers, not 'stop playing all together'...It was fun what they were doing. He didn't want it to end...

The truth was, William craved attention. He craved it a lot. Playful moments showed William he was loved and cared for. silly moments showed William he was funny and worth being around. Lastly, people like Henry showed William he didn't need to be alone anymore...

William's paper ball-throwing, was one of the many ways he'd get Henry's attention. So, since William still craved it, he decided to try and gain back Henry's attention. William sat onto his black, leather rolling chair, and started rolling it back and forth across the room.

Back and forth, back and forth, back and forth he went, multiple times in a row. This seemed to get Henry's attention. Henry, near the third time around, started following William. "What are you doing?" Henry asked.

"Getting your attention." William replied with a smug face.

Next, William rolled the chair towards Henry, and began poking him.

*poke* *poke, poke* *poke, poke, pokepoke* *pokepokepoke, poke, pokepokepokepoke*

It didn't take long for William's pokes to start irritating the poor man. So, in an attempt to stop his childish endeavors, Henry placed his foot on the chair and used it to push William away from him. "I'm trying to work." Henry told him.

"No you're not!" William reacted, mentally calling Henry's excuse 'complete bullshit'.

In retaliation, William pushed himself towards the closest wall. When his aim was completely adjusted, William pushed his feet against the wall, and rolled himself all the way across the room...towards Henry's chair!

Henry, hearing the wheels getting closer, looked up:

INSTANT panic filled his body. A quick screech had left his lungs, as he instinctively fled from the 50 pound chair with the 200 pound man riding it!

"BUMPER CARS!" William shouted before crashing into Henry's chair. William bursted out laughing and spun around in the chair, drowning in his giddy playfulness.

Henry, in anger, began to yell at the man. "DUDE! We paid good money for these chairs! You break any of these chairs, you're paying for it. Got that?" Henry asked. William only continued to laugh in amusement. So, Henry paused his yelling and, in an attempt to corner William in the chair, Henry moved his upper body REALLY close to the chair, and placed his hands on the hand rests to intimidate him. "These are NOT! BUMPER CARS!" Henry yelled.

Normally, the only way to get something into William's head is by looking him in the eyes and telling him directly. But today, William only stared at Henry with a mischievous little smile on his face, and a glint of playfulness in his eyes. Suddenly, Henry began to regret his close proximity because soon, William began poking and squeezing Henry's sides.

AAAH! Dohohon't! William, this is SERIOUS!" Henry reacted, surprised by the sudden spill of laughter. William only understood this to mean 'keep going'. So, he did! William rolled himself closer to Henry and started digging his fingers into Henry's sides. "Wihihill, I swear-Hahahaha! Come hehehehere, yohohou lihihittle-" Henry giggled, before shoving his hands into William's armpits.

William gasped in surprise. "EEEEEK!" William shrieked, retreating his hands to cover the spot. Henry let out some deep, teasy giggles to successfully intimidate the man. "Now I've gotcha..." Henry said in an evil voice.

"Now, hold on-Just waaaAAAHAHAHAHAHA! NO! GAAAAHH- SHIHIHIHIHIHIHIHIT!" William shouted desperately as his back slid down the chair.

"What's wrong, Will? Can't handle what you dish out?" Henry teased.

"HAHAHAHAHAHA! NOHOHOHOT THE AHAHAHARMPIHIHIHITS!" William begged, before giving up and flopping his body onto the floor. Henry, with his hands still in William's armpits, came falling down with him! And so, two crazy best friends could be seen lying on the ground, in front of the security camera in their room. But, Henry didn't care! That didn't stop him from continuing his tickle attack! Henry shoved his hands back into William's armpits, and continued tickling wherever he could reach.

"HEHEHEHEHENRYYY! HAHAHAHAHAHA!" William laughed helplessly. The man in the purple shirt was helplessly squirming back and forth with his arms and fists tightened against his chest. But even so, William's grip on Henry's hands, was still loose enough to get his hands out.

Henry, wanting to try somewhere else, decided to remove his hands. Next, Henry grabbed one of William's ankles and pulled the shoe right off his foot.

William sat his upper body up, and gasped in utter betrayal. "You wouldn't..." William accused in a slightly nervous voice.

It was now Henry's turn to smirk mischievously. "Oh, I would..." Henry replied smugly, removing William's sock. "And I definitely will!" Henry added, before scribbling his fingers all over William's foot.

William's face contorted, as giggles began filling in his lungs. It turns out, William's immediate reaction was to hold in his giggles. William's head began shaking back and forth to cope with the tickly feeling ALL OVER his poor foot. William's body soon found this unhelpful, and began to use his right hand to cope instead! His hand had turned into a fist, and had started pounding desperately against the ground. But pretty soon, the reminder to laugh would return and and ruin William from the inside out.

"Come on, William...It'd be a lot easier if you just laughed it aaaall out." Henry teased calmly. By now, bits of laughter was starting to come out in titters through his teeth! So, William threw his hand right up, to cover his mouth. No matter how much his lungs were forcing him, and no matter how tempting it was:

He refused! He, was NOT, going to laugh!

"Oooooh! I can tell that you're looking extremely determined! You haven't laughed in about 10 minutes! I'll admit, I'm impressed." Henry commented. "But, I can't help but feel like you need a little...nudge into the right direction..." Henry teased very suspense-fully.

William's face froze in growing fear. What did Henry have planned? Was he gonna tease him? Talk to him in baby talk? wiggle his fingers in FRONT of his feet?! BLINDFOLD HIM?! Dear lord, William couldn't even stand THINKING about it, let alone the OUTCOME...

Henry's smirk grew even wider, as his hand retreated slightly to create some suspense.

1 second...

2 seconds...

5 seconds...

10 seconds...

20 seconds...

Suddenly, Henry's fingers touched down on William's foot again! Henry breathed in and..."Aaa-coochy-coochy-coochy-coochy-coo! Aaa-coochy-coochy-coochy-coochy-coochy-coo!" Henry teased in a baby voice, wiggling his fingers during the teasing, and pausing them in between every teasy mumble.

Oh GOD NO! William began whimpering desperately, and began pounding his fists into the ground again! It looked like he was really close to breaking.

"Who has ticklish wittle feetsies? I think..." Henry paused his tickling, before resuming with all 5 fingers wiggling all at once. "William does! William definitely has de tickwish wittle footsies!" Henry teased evilly.

"GAAAAAA-FAHAHAHAHA! EEEEEEHEHEHEHEHEHEHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! NOOOOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!" William bursted out as his upper body flopped onto the ground. Now, William was actually laughing! Hysterically, too! He was finally letting out every single laugh that was pent up in his lungs.

Henry gasped happily. "There it is! Aaa-citchy-citchy-citchy-citchy-coo! Aaa-citchy-citchy-citchy-citchy-coo! Aaa-citchy-citchy-citchy-citchy-citchy-cichy-coo!" Henry teased as evil and childish as possible.

William's face had quickly turned a dark red. The teasing was SUPER overdone! He couldn't handle just how teasy these teases were!

"Awww...Is William fwustered? Is wittle William not used to tickwy teases?" Henry asked in a baby voice.

"NOHOHOHOHO IHIHIHI'M NAHAHAHAHAHAHAT!" William replied loudly, lifting himself up to point at Henry and yell at him for mentioning something like that.

"I wonder...What would happen if I moooooved...my fiiiingeeeerrs..." Henry teased, slowly walking his fingers up to where his toes were. "...Uuuuup to these...tiny toes?" Henry asked.

"GAAAAAHHHH! HEHEHENRY NOOOOOOHOHOHOHOHOHO!" William begged desperately.

"Oohohoho...Henry...YES!" Henry replied, before immediately fluttering his fingernails under William's toes.

It only took a second for William's back to fall onto the ground. laughter almost immediately turned into cackles. It was taking everything in him not to kick Henry in the face with the other foot. The tickly feeling was so overwhelmingly strong! It was a wonder he even lasted this long! Since it may not have been easy to pick up on before: William's feet are an absolute death spot for him! This was his reaction to only ONE of his feet tickled! Tickling BOTH feet, would be a completely different story.

Finally, after a while of endless tomfoolery, Henry stopped tickling him. William's laughter lessened dramatically, with only a few giggles still leaving his mouth. William laid on the ground for a bit, breathing in lots of air to make up for the oxygen he lost.

Though breathing was pretty important...So was revenge...and boy oh boy, did William feel like getting some revenge on the man!

"You okay? I didn't kill you, did I?" Henry asked.

William smiled at his friend. "No...you didn't..." William replied.

"Oh, thank God. You want help up?" Henry asked, getting up and reaching his hand out for William to grab it.

William smiled politely. "Sure." William replied, taking his hand. Right as he was gonna pull up, Henry felt a sudden tug at his arm. One more tug, and Henry was down for the count, laying beside William who had an evil smirk on his face.

"W-Will, Wai-AAAH!" Henry yelled, getting tackled by the thin man beside him.

"You thought you'd be able to tickle me, without getting any tickles yourself?" William asked, holding his arms down with his hands.

"I...no, I knew you'd get revenge. It's just that-...um..." Henry replied, drifting off as he attempted to think of an answer.

"...yeeeesssss?" William said slowly, signalling for Henry to keep going.

"I-I didn't know that you'd recover so quickly...I thought I'd get a...bit of a break before getting tickled." Henry explained.

William's face softened a bit. He let go of his arms and sat up a little bit. "Oh...Well, looks like you caused your own funeral then." William declared, before poking and clawing at Henry's ribs first.

"What- Hehehehey! Dohohon't gohohoho blahahaming thihihihihis ohohon MEEhehehe! Yohohohou stahahaharted ihihihihit!" Henry argued through his giggles.

"Yeah! And I'm finishing it!" William replied confidently. Next, William moved his hands down to Henry's lower body, and began to drill his thumbs into Henry's hips.

"Ohoho GAHAHAHAD NOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!" Henry bursted out. Henry's entire body reacted to the tickling and in an instant, began squirming like a madman!

William couldn't even hold him down! "Holy shit man! I'm not killing you, I swear!" William reacted. In an attempt to get Henry under control, William sat himself onto Henry's waist and resorted to Henry's upper ribs instead.

"IHIHIHI'M TOOHOhohoho squihihihirmy fohohohohohor thihihihihis!" Henry complained as his laughter lessened a little bit.

"I can see that! You're just a squirmy little wiggle worm." William replied smugly.

"Shuhuhuhut uhuhuhup!" Henry shot back at him.

"Why? Don't like your friend reminding you of the truth? Guess what world! Henry is a wiggle, wiggle, wiggle worm!" William teased with a big smile, as he clawed and dug in between the ribs of Henry's ribcage.

"WIHIHIHILL! NOHOHOHOHOHO! STAHAHAHAHAP IHIHIHIHIT!" Henry begged.

"No way! It's too cute! You're a wiggly little worm! And, if I remember correctly..." William added, before moving his arm behind him. William reached out to Henry's knee, and squeezed it a few times.

All of nowhere, a snort and a giggle rang through through the room!

Henry covered his mouth with his hand, to cover up the embarrassing sound he had just made.

"You have a cute little snort too!" William mentioned.

"Ihihihit's nahahahahat cuhuhuhute..." Henry argued.

William let out an offended gasp and squeezed his knee a few more times in retaliation. Henry's muffled snorts and giggles began to fill the room and fill Will's heart as well.

"Are you kidding me? The snorts are the best part about you! It's adorable!" William replied, pausing his squeezing for a minute.

Henry didn't seem to think so. "It's weird...I don't like it." Henry admitted.

"Well, since you're not gonna love your own snort, I'm gonna have to love it for you." William reacted, before giving his knee another squeeze. "The truth is, any woman would love to have a husband who snorts. It's an adorable feature that you come with. If a woman won't appreciate that part of you, then I sure as hell will!" William added as he continued to squeeze Henry's knees.

Henry continued to wiggle back and forth, giggling and snorting uncontrollably. Even though Henry appreciated the compliment, he didn't really believe him. His snort was something that his family and friends would make fun of him for. Some of them even went as far as to call him 'Mr. Piggy' in school. That taught him that snorts are weird and only good for laughing at. It's not like he could control it, either! He couldn't, and that made things worse!

William was the only person who...actually got excited the first time he heard him snort. Instead of laughing at him like most kids did, William would...treat him like an adorable puppy for having such a snort. He would also make him laugh as much as possible, to hear it as much as he could. That's what made William so different from the others: He appreciated his small quirks.

In return, Henry would grow to appreciate William's adorable quirks! One of his adorable quirks, happened to include: how freaking ticklish the man was! All you'd have to do is poke him in the ribs, and William would be down on the floor, giggling up a storm! Sometimes, Henry would follow him and keep tickling the man! It was unbelievable how ticklish the man would reveal himself to be! Just about all the usual tickle spots made him laugh! However: there was one, single spot that Henry absolutely loved:

And that was right where he was gonna strike! Since William was busy looking at the knees behind him, Henry reached his hands out and wiggled his fingers onto William's tummy.

William gasped in surprise! "Yeeehehehehehahahaha! NO! NO WAY!" William yelled, pushing away his arms in an attempt to hold dominance over him. However, Henry was quick! "It was MY turn for reve-EEEEhehehehehehehehehe! Stahahap ihihit! Ihihit was MYHYHY TUHUHUHURN!" William begged as he attempted, but failed to cover up his belly and armpits. In the process of covering up the spots, Henry gave William a friendly push, allowing William to fall backwards so Henry could become the ler once again!

"Newsflash! Your turn just expired!" Henry replied confidently as he got up and continued tickling Will's chubby-looking tummy.

"Yohohohohou suhuhuhuhuck! Ihihi wahahahahanted rehehehehevenge!" William argued.

"You got your revenge! Plus, we were talking about adorable things about each other! My adorable thing, apparently, is my snort. YOUR adorable thing, is how unbelievably ticklish you really are!" Henry explained.

"I can touch here-" Henry wiggled his fingers around William's belly button, making him squeal and giggle.

"Here-" Henry clawed his fingers on William's ribcage, causing his laughter to heighten.

"Here-" Henry squeezed William's hips, making him cackle.

"Even here!" Henry fluttered his fingers on William's neck, making him squeak and giggle in a high-pitched voice.

"-And you'll explode into laughter immediately! Your entire body is ticklish, and it's so cute!" Henry declared.

William started squirming slightly to cope with the different spots being poked and prodded at. He was WAY too ticklish for his own good!

"Ihihihit ihihisn't fahahahahair! Yohohohou're lehehess tihihicklihihish thahahahan mehehehe!" William argued.

Henry rolled his eyes. "Aww, boo-hoo! Poor William is TOO ticklish for his OWN GOOD! How terrible! Such bad news! So unfortunate!" Henry taunted dramatically.

"Shuhuhut uhuhup, you ahahahasshohohohole!" William spat back, unable to handle how flustered he was becoming.

Henry paused his hands, and covered his mouth with them as he gasped in surprise and offense. "Such language, coming from a pizzeria owner for KIDS! That language is NOT! TOLERATED here! I think SOMEONE needs some SENSE tickled into them!" Henry scolded before shoving his hands into William's armpits.

"NOOOHOHOHOHOAHAHAHAHAHA! IHIHIHI'M SAHAHAHAHARRYYYY! IHIHI'M SAAAHAHAHAHRRYYYHEHEHEHE!" William shouted.

"Oh, but I don't think you really ARE, though! At least, not yet! Am I right?" Henry asked as he continued to quickly tickle his armpits.

"NOHOHOHOHOHO! IHIHIHI'M REHEHEHEHEALLY SAHAHAHARRY! PLEHEHEHEHEASE!" William shouted through his endless laughter.

"Oh! Now you're saying you're REALLY sorry!...I see! Well, I suppose I could consider letting you-"

"YEHEHEHEHES PLEHEHEHEHEASE! LEHEHEHET MEHEHEHE GOOHOHOHOHOHO!" William shouted suddenly!

"Hey! I didn't finish yet! You just earned yourself 2 more minutes of tickles, Will!" Henry declared.

Eventually, Henry did stop to let the poor man breath. Though, Henry ended up regretting his actions, once William's revenge included RASPBERRIES! And only God knew how ticklish THOSE were! But, even William eventually had pity on the man, and stopped himself. He didn't wanna kill him, after all. Plus, it was nearing the end of their work day! So, William wanted Henry to have a bit of time to get read to go home!

After packing up their stuff, the two co-workers left the building, giving each other a hug before going their separate ways. As William drove home, he felt thankful for having a best friend like Henry. He also felt thankful for the little snort noises that came with Henry. It was a super adorable thing that William loved about him. It was...a bit of a guilty pleasure...But, that's normal!...

Or so he hoped...

[traincat]

Fic Author Tag Game

AO3 Name: Traincat

Fandoms: Currently it’s fairly exclusively Fantastic Four and Spider-Man comics, particularly the 616-verse, with some works for related fandoms.

Number of fics: 102 posted on Ao3. 

Tagging @bipeteparker @moonwolfhowl @mishatheberry

1) Fic you spent the most time on: The Boy From New York City, my The Amazing Spider-Man/Fant4stic Spideytorch movieverse fic, definitely. I started it in 2015 and posted it in late 2018. A lot of that wasn’t active writing time -- I wrote about 50k of its 80k wordcount in 2018. But it was a fic that I spent a lot of time on and a lot of energy devoted to, trying to figure out what the best way to tell the story was, playing with different point of views, what the actual plot was going to be, what I wanted it to say, and that’s not counting the amount of times I watched TASM/2 and Fant4stic to try and nail down everything just how I wanted it. Andrew Garfield’s Peter Parker speech patterns are SUPER specific and I wanted to get them DOWN. I also wanted things to play out in a very cinematic way, like a third installment of The Amazing Spider-Man movies. So a lot of time went into that fic. 

2) Fic you spent the least time on: To Have and to Hold, an Into the Spider-Verse fic about May Parker and Olivia Octavius getting married, much to Peter’s distress. I think I wrote it in like a day. 

3) Longest fic: The Boy From New York City, at 84,500 words. 

4) Shortest fic: wrap yourself around me, a really short Spideytorch clothes sharing fic. It’s under 500 words.

5) Most hits: The Masked Man (Who Has Everything), an X-Men: First Class Erik/Charles fic I wrote back in 2011 to answer a very important question on the old LJ kink meme: what if Magneto was Batman? It has like, almost 75,000 hits, so. That was an easy one lol.

6) Most kudos: It’s also The Masked Man (Who Has Everything), so my second most kudosed fic is Keep Throwing Things and Slamming the Door, one of my first Spideytorch fics. 

7) Most comment threads: To Have and to Hold again! Which is kind of nice since it’s relatively new. It did get some pretty big recs though so I’m not all that surprised. 

8) Fave fic you wrote: Oh that’s a tough one. I have a couple of favorites -- I really like the fics in my Tales From the Back Pages series, which is a Spideytorch soulmates AU that plays with the very early days of canon and reimagines it within a world where soulmates are a known phenomenon and Peter and Johnny are each other’s. It’s fun to take canon events that are really familiar and go, what do they look like in this world where everything is the same but also there’s this one really big difference? The Boy From New York City again because I worked on it for so long and at the end I pushed myself really hard to make it exactly what I wanted it to be and I’m really proud of the end result. It’s also one of those fics where I feel like writing it made me a better writer ultimately because I was pushing myself so hard to be like, worthy of what it was in my head. Work Song, which is a Spideytorch canon rewrite of the aftermath of Superior Spider-Man. Another one where I feel like I learned a lot by writing it and where I’m really proud of the end result, even if I did have to read all of Superior Spider-Man to write it. Cat's Cradle, a Spider-Man PS4 Peter/Felicia fic about their maybe-baby from the DLC, because I really loved writing that fic. Night Blooms, a Victor Von Doom/Reed Richards fic based around Reed’s connection to the alternate universe Victor from Marvel Two-In-One (2017) #11, because canon gave me so much to work with there and because it was a Yuletide fic for @portwinestains where I knew I could give her exactly what she wanted and I just went for it. Writing that one was a blast and I got to dig into such a rich canon relationship. It was fantastic, even if while I had to like, try and subtly find out how much infidelity Aysha was cool with without letting her know what I was doing. 

And then there’s Hands On where I like, REALLY wanted to be the first person to write Spideytorch smut featuring six arm Spider-Man. And I was. And weirdly that genre of fic hasn’t taken off? Look, you just need to keep very detailed notes for yourself about where all eight hands involved are. 

9) Fic you want to rewrite/expand on: There are a couple! They’re expansions, not rewrites. I don’t think I have anything finished that I feel I would want to rewrite from scratch. I have a third installment of my fairy tale series, The Spider Prince and the Morning Star, where the idea is like very fresh in my head right now so I’ve been playing with that a lot. The first two fics in the series are Spideytorch, but this one is a MYSTERY pairing. (It’s not that big of a mystery. It’s pretty easy to guess what it’s going to be based on the end of the second fic.) And there’s a lot of stuff from The Boy From New York City where it was like, I had ideas about where I COULD go with things, if I wanted to. The Boy From New York City is very much Peter’s story, very much The Amazing Spider-Man 3, so I think there is a lot of space to go forward that would be more focused on Johnny. But on the other hand I do think a lot about a fic that takes The Amazing Spider-Man 2′s deleted alternate ending and asks the question, what if instead of meeting his father in the graveyard, Peter met the sixteen-year-old sister he never knew he had? And I don’t know how many people want TASM fic about what Teresa Parker would be like in that universe but you know. I kind of do. 

10) Share a bit of your WIP or share a story idea that you’re planning: PeterFlash 2020! I’m working on it. It got long and I wanted to play with canon, what else is new.

“You were always stuck up,” Flash grunted, lying down on a flat stretch of rock. It was freezing cold, leaching the heat through Flash’s jacket and jeans, but it felt good at the same time. “And you made Liz cry.”

“I didn’t make Liz Allan cry,” Peter snorted, rolling his eyes.

“You did, though,” Flash said, closing his eyes. He probably shouldn’t have said that, he knew. Liz wouldn’t have liked it. But Peter had made her sob until the cuffs of her pink sweater had been wet with her tears and Flash had just had to stand there and take it, unable to make it better as badly as he had wanted to, all because stupid Peter Parker was too thick to see that Liz was the best thing in their entire school. “She really liked you and you just ignored her.”

“I was busy,” Peter said. Flash cracked open an eye; Peter was standing over him, staring down at him with a quizzical expression on his face, like Flash was one of his fancy complicated math problems, only Peter had never had a hard time solving those.

Warmth spread from Flash’s stomach right down to his toes with the idea that he was the kind of problem even Peter Parker might have trouble solving.

“We were all busy,” Flash said, shrugging. “We all had stuff. Doesn’t mean you had to ignore everybody else.” 

“I wanted to be liked,” Peter admitted, sitting down crosslegged next to Flash. He had a funny kind of look on his face, his brows knit together fiercely. He was going to have a wrinkle there in a couple of years, probably. Butterflies lit up in Flash’s stomach, trying to imagine it.

“You had a funny way of showing it,” Flash said.

“Yeah, yeah,” Peter grumbled, stretching out next to him. He put his arms behind his head, looking for all the world like he was sunning himself even though it was November and practically freezing already. “What are you gonna do now?”

“I don’t know,” Flash admitted, trying not to stare down at him. It wasn’t like Peter would ever know, though – his eyes were closed. “Get a job, I guess.”

“Flash Thompson, working man,” Peter whistled.

“Don’t strain something not being a jackass, Parker, you’ve gone a whole five minutes,” Flash said, rolling his eyes. “It’s not like I’ve got a choice. Can’t stay in school without that scholarship and it’s not like I can go home.”

Peter cracked one eye open. Something about his eyes had always made Flash’s stomach go funny; they were the warmest brown he’d ever seen, flecked with gold, and they shone on those rare occasions when Peter laughed. But usually they looked how they looked now: filled with suspicion, and just a touch of scorn.

“You can’t go home?” he asked.

[seb-ass-tian-stan]

touch | seb stan one shot

pairing: reader x co-star!seb

warnings: big fat fluff, anxiety, slow burn but NOT because it’s a one shot after all, romantic cheesy CRAP

a\n: started out as a headcanon, so it’s written in a weirdly casual way (for the most part). just a heads up! Also let me know what you think!!! Feel 100% free

Another note: I HATE it when writers don’t put an ‘under the cut’ link and i’ve already done that twice so im sorry!!!! Last time promise

You and seb have been acquaintances for a couple of years, met each other in a broadway production you both starred in, you were never super close. Just distant friends. After a while of not seeing him you two get to play in a second rendition of the show due to popular demand or something like that and you become friends again.

And as time goes by, with each rehearsal he suddenly sees something in you. Suddenly he realises his feelings for you. He looks at you and realises you’re more than a fair woman, you’re beautiful. The flaws that used to make you an average in his blind eyes now make you exactly what he sees as the ideal. Utter perfection.

But... Sebastian keeps it on the down low because he’s kind of embarrassed about all of that, as one would be.

His embarrassment mostly comes from him believing that you’re out of his league. I mean he knows he looks decent, more or less. But as for his personality, he never thought of himself as macho or suave and you’re ex was all that, so Seb doesn’t have the courage to make a move.

But listen to that; there are certain things that he just can’t control. Little small tiny hiccups. 

Like, by example, when you two are rehearsing he’ll come wearing this, gorgeous, gorgeous, mens perfume that smells like heaven for all those attracted to the male species. And it’s most definitely on purpose.

One time, you two rehearse a Kiss ™, and out of nowhere, he takes his time. Just slightly more. And instead of looking into your eyes afterwards and holding you firmly as the once director directed, he looks down and blushes and just holds one of your hands ever so lightly. But it’s the lightness that gets you to really feel it. Surprisingly, or not, just your fingers brushing against each other has so much more impact than a firm grip of the body. God.

In the mornings he starts to bring you coffee. And he did that the first time you were working together, but now it’s Starbucks. You’re favourite brew -  alongside these great dutch waffles they have. 

He lives nowhere near a Starbucks.

And when all the actors are sitting down for some wine drinking and lighthearted conversations, he tries to sit as close to you as possible. If there’s a spot right next to you, it’s a jackpot. It really is.

So then, he sits next to you on the sofa and your knees keep brushing. He looks at them and then at you - back and forth. You’re unbothered, invested instead in the conversation with your co-star across the room.

So he stays as is. 

On another similar occasion he even puts his arm behind you. not to get your attention or to let you know he’s flirting, God no! Simply because he likes to be close to you and feel your body warmth on him. The moment you’d notice, he would move his arm and apologise, as he rehearsed in his mind.

You laugh and sit back on his arm. He doesn’t pull it away, he’s afraid to do any sharp movements - if he’s afraid to touch you - it’s a signal he wants to, isn’t it? All those thoughts get his mind spinning and he’s super anxious and he hates himself for that. He didn’t do anything dramatic, nothing too risky, and he’s already sweaty. And you can kinda sense it. 

You look back and he swallows his spit and blushes. “Are you ok? Did I hurt you?”, and he wants to say all is well. more than well. That you’re beautiful and smell nice and he’s lucky to feel you against him. But you lean forward and return to your chattering, not before flashing a lazy and ingenuine smile. But he’ll take it!!

One time, he gets a facetime call from his mum as you two are waiting for rehearsal to start. Something inside him (most likely the something that considers you to be one of the focal points of his life at moment - his heart) tells him to introduce you two. You and his mother.

So after turning the camera to the green room to show Georgetta the place he was spending most his time at, he turns it back and then to his side, to you. To unbothered, distracted, nonchalant, cool, beautiful, funny, dreamy you.

You say hello. You say hello and then giggle a bit. And that little insecure fuck takes it as a “that was really weird of you” giggle. So he turns the phone to his other side and introduces his mum to a “stage-crew-assistant-person-kinda��� while he’s sowing together a few bold coloured garmets, and then goes, “So yah... we’re all good friends here!”, and his mind goes full on survival mode and starts looking for a way out of the situation.

One day... You two finish late. You tell him in a casual manner that you’re going home by foot. The little idiot says, “Great, goodnight!”, with an appropriate idiot smile, so you start walking away.

But the minute you step outside the venue, his calls your name and asks if you want him to walk you. It’s the bravest he’s ever been near you, and your oblivious ass goes haha sure weird flex but ok ! :-).

At the first 3 minutes you two are kinda silent, which is awkward for the both of you - but so so so much more for him. It’s painful.

But then, you start talking about the hot weather outside and that leads to talking about how much you love winter and miss it. And your descriptions of the cold weather send Sebastian back to his childhood so much it makes his nostrils expand because he can almost smell the rain.

The conversation suddenly gets deep. Without him even trying, which makes him excited. It reconfirms his now strong feelings for your cuteass.

He tells you about winter in romania which leads to his escaping from communism story which leads to talking about the human condition and the meaning of life. And it’s wonderful and he’s not that scared anymore, it’s like talking to his best friend.

Before you know it it’s 4AM and you’ve been sitting on your buildings stairs for about 2 hours. You frankly wanna end the conversation because you have a long day tomorrow but he talks so freely and he’s never been like that with you before —he opens up and it shouldn’t ever be interrupted, it being such a rare thing to occur. So you listen carefully and start to notice;

The way his lips move is to be put in a museum of modern art. He is so invested in the story so his hands move magestically to further convey it, and they’re big and manly and he looks so handsome, you feel like you just met him. Your hearts literally flutters and you hope he never finishes the story because when it’s your turn to speak, you’ll have nothing to say but hello, nice to meet you.

And—“Wow,” you think, “What was that?”. Now your mind is racing.

You aren’t aware of his own loving and anxious thoughts so you do everything you can to surpress your own.

You both are surprised by that time. You’re surprised by the fact that this beautiful man with the great deal of talent and an even greater deal of sex appeal agrees to stay in your presence for so long.

He is surprised by the exact same thing. This treasure of a woman sitting beside him and listening to him. Not to mention, he’s surprised by himself, feeling comfortable to talk for so long!

All of a sudden he’s aware of how much talking he’s been doing and he stops. “-I’ve been talking for so long. Oh god, sorry.”

He reaches to put his hand on your own (which rests on your thigh) as he says the word “Sorry”. But his body stops him and he only puts it on her knee.

Then again, it’s also so painfully intimate. A mistake. His mind says go back but he doesn’t. He freezes.

The sun starts to rise as the street clock says 4:55, and you see him now much clearer. You smile at Sebastian while a person that works for the city in cleaning its streets walks past you two.

Your hand was now voluntarily resting on his.

He finishes swiping some leaves away and looks at you two, and, with an incredibly apologising look, asks to get up because he should swipe off some dirt and dust of off the stairs you’ve been on for 2 hours.

You do so and look away while he does his craft so you don’t make him uncomfortable by staring at him. Sebastian has such great manners, you think to yourself. But it wasn’t manners—it was a pure heart—you’ll find later in life.

The elderly man turns around and thanks you two for your patience. He rarely encountered something like that in the streets of New York.

“You two are charming. Have a good morning.”

Sebastian nods to him in thanks and the man walks away. No words needed to be exchanged now in order for you to figure the situation out. No words needed. The sun was now high enough to light the street up and you saw everything so very clear - the both of you.

[bespectacled-panda]

after seeing dumpywoof’s post I was inspired to do a tier list of my own!!! and boy howdy do I have some hot takes of the century it turns out,,,

the seasons are more or less organized in descending order within the same row as well (e.g. MC 4 > MC 5). also, shamefully copying dumpywoof & putting a detailed & overly verbose explanation for each season:

S Tier

Terraria 3: For me, absolutely nothing compares to Terraria 3. No other season combines such perfect participant dynamics with such heart-wrenching drama—not to mention the existence of Team New Kids who make me cry on a daily basis, or the incredible fake twist ending. It would be a sin to put this season anywhere but alone at the very top. Also props for being the only (1 of 2) post-show that actually includes all of the cast.

 A Tier

Minecraft 4: This is the best season for shenanigans alone, hands-down. It’s largely just the participants shooting the shit together, especially in the latter half of the season when it gets down to just the four of them. & I have a huge soft spot for men being wholesomely foolish together I suppose, so here it goes fhdhfhd.

Minecraft 5: To be honest, I have not seen this season since it released, which is a crime, I know, I’m sorry :orb: But I remember it being very very good, & I cannot imagine my taste will have changed that dramatically in just a few years, so. in truth, this one might be actually better than MC 4, but as I have not seen it in many years I can’t say that for certain. Either way, though, it’s definitely one of the best seasons out there.

MineZ 1: To me, MineZ 1 is the reverse of MC 4: low on shenanigans & high on drama. It’s pre-Todd era, but the editing in this one is honestly Todd-level, I would say. It’s so incredibly tense, especially the scene with McJones & PBG trying to escape the caves, and I feel like the sheer stress of it all brought out a new side of a lot of the participants, most notably Dean—who sounded genuinely agonized at times. A very very quality season all around, IMO.

Terraria 2: This season probably objectively deserves to be B tier, but I am it giving A tier for personal bias. I just,,, love the dynamics okay. Jeff & McJones especially made for a killer duo. It was a rare instance of McJones being the funny man himself rather than being the straight man to someone else’s funny man; he was super uncharacteristically goofy & almost borderline flirtatious at times, it really made for some good moments fhdhfjd. Plus then you got McJones solo commentary at the end which I greatly enjoyed. Just,, a very enjoyable season, very mid-HC era, very light & easy to watch, all that good stuff.

Diablo II: Man,,,,this absolutely 100% does not deserve A tier, I know, I’m sorry, but I just can’t bring myself to put it lower. I have A tier love for it :orb: Admittedly, the game is horrendously ugly and confusing to watch, but the shenanigans + the cast dynamics win me over in the end. Paul especially was great in this, & I hope he makes a return someday. Loving fathers Paul & Jirard with their sorceress son McJones making their way through the end-game just cannot be beaten. (Anti-shoutouts to Ross though, I don’t know anything about him, I am sure he is a lovely man, but GOD. WHY DID HE KEEP RUNNING OFF ON HIS OWN & GETTING LOST BUT THEN FORCEFULLY REFUSING HELP,,, ROSS YOU ARE THE WORST DHDHFJDJD)

 B Tier

Minecraft 7: Boy,,, this is going to be a controversial take fhhfjdjf. I just don’t know how to explain it, but something about MC7 felt,,,, Very off. I don’t know what it was, just something about the season seemed very,,, almost like you could tell things were falling apart behind the scenes, & they were trying to pull it back together but weren’t quite succeeding. It’s not a bad season in any regards, of course, I just,, don’t enjoy it nearly as much as a lot of others,, it’s missing that crucial spark of life in my opinion,, also Dean leaving to go to work was kind of strange,, I get it, it’s probably difficult to work around his real-life job,, but it felt strange,, he got like temporary immunity. Nothing like that had ever happened before I don’t think. And also they never even explained why Dean wasn’t there for like three episodes fjdjfjhd,,

Minecraft 3: God I feel like I just keep digging myself into a deeper & deeper hole here fhsjfjd,,, but man, I did like MC3 to be honest. It wasn’t the best season, it kind of went nowhere, but I liked the cast & there was a lot of good funnymoments. Smooth & Shane were very good guests who I feel like really rounded out the season, & Jontron did not come off as terribly overbearing as I believe that he has in other seasons. Overall, pretty decent, I’d say.

 C Tier

Minecraft 2: MC 2 & MC 3 are very similar, but I think MC 2 is slightly worse, both in terms of entertainment & cast. NCS & Kyrak did not hit like Smooth & Shane did,,, and I feel like just everything that happened in this one was fairly forgettable. I was torn as to whether this should be a B or a C, but I put it here in the end just to drive home that I really don’t like it as much as MC 3, I don’t believe.

Minecraft 6: Oh lord, this is a nuclear take fhdjfjd. Again, this isn’t a bad season at all, it has its good moments, especially Chad & Dodger, they are angels & I love them & want them back. But boy,,, just. Many things went wrong here. None of the twists panned out like,, at all, which I know isn’t necessarily anyone’s fault, the concept of this twist & of twists in general is very good. But it fell so flat here, especially with the revival. There was,, no debate at all about what to do. They hyped it up like they had this big decision to make, but then nobody made any effort to dramatize it at all. It was basically just Dean deciding by himself and everyone just sitting back & letting him. For the record, I have no qualms with the fact that Dodger was revived, I fully agree that she deserved it over McJones, but it was not played well at all IMO,,,      I do have to admit, though, with a fair amount of sheepishness, that the thing that most sullies this season for me is McJones’s death. Just,,, his horrible, so so avoidable, insanely early death, coupled with his retirement shortly thereafter & him becoming so jaded with hc that he expressed borderline hostility & hatred towards it just,,, hurts. I kinda don’t wanna see the events of MC 6 now knowing the aftermath. I understand fully that this particular point is not something most people care about to say the least dhfhdjd, but,,, in all honesty, I really don’t have any desire to rewatch this one, as objectively good as it might be. It was a win but it felt like a loss, if that makes sense. Also the post-show lacked all three people I actually wanted to hear from fhdjfjd neither the two people who could’ve been revived nor the actual person who did the reviving were there to share their insight & perspectives on it :pensive: 

 D Tier

Starbound: man,,, starbound. This is a very mixed bag for me. On one hand, I disagree with people who say that it was boring or that nothing happened, I found it very tense, Todd’s editing had me on edge throughout every episode. But on the other hand,,, man. Very few memorable moments, what even happened in this one,, also I feel like the game mechanics/plot weren’t explained very well, I feel like I remember being vaguely confused all the time as to what was happening. Probably will not ever rewatch either.

 Have Not Seen

DayZ: I will not ever be watching this season both because I do not know anything about DayZ & because from what I’ve heard it was an absolute disaster, I’m just not interested in getting involved in that fhdhfjdk

Terraria 1: There’s not really a reason I haven’t watched this one. Just,, I haven’t made my way down to the earliest seasons yet. Although as mentioned before, I have seen a few clips of this season, & Jontron seems to be pretty obnoxious in this one, so I don’t how much I’ll enjoy the parts with him in it, but I definitely do want to watch it someday.

Minecraft 1: The same as Terraria 1, I just happen to not have seen this one by chance. But unlike T1, I am much more looking forward to actually watching it, it seems really good, I want to experience that legendary very first season at last dhdhfjd

MineZ 2: Man,,, many things about the behind-the-scenes of this season make me sort of uncomfortable honestly. Just,,, the visceral second-hand shame & embarrassment of someone in the hc fandom being so rude & bothersome to the cast,, somehow it makes me feel personally responsible even though I didn’t do anything fhdjfj,,, Also,, once again continuing with the trend of me being saddened by McJones expressing dislike for seasons fhdjfjd,, I do recall him saying, regarding this season, something like “I think it would’ve been better if we just never did this,” which,,, ow. That doesn’t make me particularly enthused to watch it fhdjfjd. I probably will end up watching this season someday to be honest, but I’m not looking forward to feeling the cast’s frustration & unhappiness with the situation,, (EDIT: I want to be clear that there is no actual drama surrounding minez 2!!! it is a perfectly fine season, there is nothing wrong with it, it just happens that I personally am bothered by the fact that there was a lot of like,,, frustration coming from the participants regarding the player who was stalking them. this in no way means that minez 2 is an objectively bad or problematic season!! if minez 2 is your favorite season I completely respect you, there is nothing wrong with that!! there is a lot to like about the season as a whole!!! I just personally care too much about mcjones having a bad time in seasons bc it’s what ultimately led to his retirement, & that makes me sad fjdhfjdjd. but it has come to my attention that my wording made it sound like there was drama about minez 2, which there never actually was, I am very very sorry for my unintentional yet poor choice of words.)

[bellarkefanfiction]

#NoClickbait

written by: Josefine / @selflessbellamy

prompt: This is typical but maybe distracting kiss while playing a video game? Person A is competitive, 100% focused on winning and person B starts to plant kisses, all because of the competition, no one is in love here, it's a cold, calculating strategy. for anonymous 

word count: 2204

Sharing an apartment with a Youtuber has its pros and cons. For instance, her roommate has — on numerous occasions — demanded to film alone in the living room for hours, because “it has much better lighting.” At night, she often hears him groan loud in frustration while editing, which would be funny if she didn’t have to wake up early for class most mornings.

However, the pros outweigh the cons, at least as it is right now. They’ve been living together for almost a year now, and since she told him that she didn’t mind being a part of his videos every once in a while, he has involved her in his creative process. Unlike a lot of YouTube channels, Bellamy Blake’s offers a wide range of different content, such as:

cook with me: grilled chicken breast (with a twist)

vlog: a day at the bookstore + haul

history has left us: queer!Achilles (Pride Month special)

If his subscriber count of 3.2 million is anything to go by, this kind of content is great entertainment for everyone watching. Hell, Clarke even watches his videos despite the fact that she lives with him and could easily just sneak into the living room to watch him film. Still, she attempts to stay away, because Bellamy doesn’t tend to stare over her shoulder as she draws one of her pictures.

Sometimes, though, her thriving curiosity gets the better of her. When he first noticed her piqued interest, his dark eyes crinkled at the corners and he told her, “Princess, if you wanna know what I’m doing then you have to be a part of it.”

At first, Clarke had wondered whether having her show up in his videos was just gonna be a cheap clickbait trick, so that he could include her in the thumbnail and write a title called ‘vlog: Santa Monica with my girlfriend’, but he didn’t.

Instead, he turned the camera on her face as they were walking down the peer and said, “Oh, by the way guys. This is my roommate Clarke. She’s tagging along.”

He had probably expected her to not say anything, maybe give a shy little wave in response, because that’s what usually happens when people are camera shy. Clarke’s actual reaction was so far from that. In teasing, she stuck her tongue out at him and retorted, “Oh please, you’re the one who’s tagging along. I need someone to help me decide which Bath Bomb to get.”

That is the start of Clarke’s appearance in Bellamy’s videos, and since then she has only showed up more, for longer periods of time. A couple weeks ago she assisted him while he did the ‘Blindfolded Book Challenge’ by picking various classics and non-fiction works from his bookshelf.

After that video was posted, he told her not to look at the comments, which only made her suspicious, because he’d never advised her to stay away from the comment section of his videos before, and for a moment she thought that his viewers were perhaps making fun of her or something. Despite that the possibilities made her somewhat nervous, she couldn’t hold herself back.

The most popular comment jumped out at her:

[Top Comments - click to show]

Dani Larsson: y’all can’t tell us you’re not dating after this.

781+

Gulping, Clarke clicked on the replies and found the first couple ones to be:

Lydia Marcello: yea, just look at 13:52. That shoulder-lean is the least platonic thing I have seen in the modern era.

123+

Furrowing her brow, Clarke went to the timestamp to see what the girl was referring to — and there right before the end of the video as Bellamy said, “I guess that’s it for the Blindfolded Book Challenge. Thanks for watching!” — he pulled Clarke against his side, making her lean her head against his shoulder for a second, smiling.

After forcing her eyes off the frozen frame, Clarke looked at the comment below Lydia Marcello’s only to find:

 TJ Byrne: Well, if he’s not dating her, I would love to tap that.

2+

While the comment didn’t bother her much, it sure as hell seemed to have bothered Bellamy (and a lot of his loyal viewers), because he had actually responded:

Bellamy Blake: @TJ Byrne: Too bad. Sexist white Internet creeps aren’t her type.

201+

Clarke had to bite back the urge to laugh. Also, it was difficult to ignore the clear voice at the back of her head who kept telling her that men with bronze, freckled skin and lots of sharp edges is her type. Still, she has only ever seen one person who looks like that.

A person, whose laughter could light up the entire world, who places pencils behind his ear and hums while he cooks.

***

One late afternoon she returns, violet and vermillion paint caked beneath her fingernails, to the sight of Bellamy sitting cross-legged on the couch, his trusted laptop in front of him and square glasses resting on the bridge of his nose. As always, he looks up when she enters the living room.

“I’m gonna cook dinner. Chicken Alfredo pasta, does that sound good?”

He beams, most likely with as much surprise as amusement, because she’s rarely the one who prepares meals. Still, she wants to prove to him that she’s learned quite a lot from watching his culinary-themed videos.

“Very,” is his simple comment, though the lone word manages to convey his enthusiasm. When she turns to walk into the kitchen, he suddenly adds, “Hey, Clarke, would you mind being in a video later?”

The curiosity in her mind sparks like colorful fireworks. “What kind of video?” Given the complexity of Bellamy’s content, it’s impossible for her to have the faintest idea… Maybe it’s another challenge video? A casual vlog? One of his informative history sessions?

Then he explains that his viewers would love his nostalgia series to feature a gaming video. “I have Mario Kart for my old PlayStation, so… I thought it’d be more fun if we played it together. You know I love how competitive you are.”

That last bit seems to be coated in fondness, the words soft — a stark contrast to his usual teasing tone, and it has color rising to her cheeks, undoubtedly. In order to hide the blush, Clarke turns away, but not without saying, “Of course. That sounds fun,” over her shoulder.

To her joy, Bellamy eats two large portions of the Chicken Alfredo pasta and praises her for using vegetables and spices that complement the creamy sauce. Hearing him say this makes her heart feel warm.

Together, they do the dishes while listening to ‘Cigarette Daydreams’ from one of Bellamy’s vinyl records. Most of his collection he inherited from his dad, but he adds a newer record once in a while. Afterwards the struggle with setting up the lights in preparation for filming — since the sky has now darkened, they need to improve the lighting in the living room.

Before they can turn on the camera, they have to plan a quick intro. Of course, Bellamy will do the most of the talking, since it’s his channel, but he tells her that he doesn’t want her to hold anything back, especially not during the gameplay itself.

It feels like an eternity has passed. At last, Bellamy clicks record, takes a seat next to Clarke and says, “Welcome back guys! I looked at your requests and quickly had to realize that you all want to see me play a video game,” he runs his fingers through the back of his hair, “As you will probably find out, I suck at gaming. I’ve killed a Sim once, and it was not on purpose.”

Clarke mouths, “He has,” hoping that the teasing it will amuse some of his viewers.   

“Anyway, I dragged the Princess along for this one. She’s gonna crush me as Peach.”

Chuckling, she replies, “Oh, I sure am. No more of that ‘damsel in distress’ Peach. Those days are over, and you’re gonna go down.”

Even though they didn’t plan it for the intro, they look at each other, faces inches from one another to signify the “stand-off” that’s about to happen. However, within a couple seconds, they both crack up.

As it turns out, Bellamy is not actually bad at Mario Kart, which seems to surprise him way more than it does her. Within ten of playing minutes, he’s in 3rd place, but he makes the mistake of gloating, “Now, who’s gonna go down, Princess?”

Maybe they should stop using that expression…

Oh, well. “You still are,” Clarke laughs just as she uses the Starman that she’s had up her sleeve for a couple minutes, and while it does help her overtake a lot of players, she’s only gets to the fourth position, right behind him.

Bellamy does what he can to maintain his lead. Out of the corner of her eye, Clarke sees him lick his lips in concentration, and the sight damn near distracts her. Quickly, she collects herself, and while it’s difficult to keep up with him when she has to stay on the course, she’s tailing him.

When he bumps his shoulder against hers in teasing, moving his controller just to annoy her, an unfamiliar sensation sparks in her ribcage, causing her to lean closer and press her lips to his neck, right below his sharp jawline. At first she feels him freeze. Scared that she has overstepped an invisible boundary, she draws back, but he…

He is smiling. “You think you can distract me?”

“I can’t?” Turning her attention back to the television, Clarke smirks as her heart flips itself over and over.

Now she thinks she notices the faint pink tint in his freckled cheeks, but it might be her eyes playing a trick on her. With much confidence, Bellamy says, “You gotta keep trying…”

Right now, they’re doing the final lap around the course, still tailing each other, brushing each other like they are in real life. It seems as though he just gave her another challenge — one, which she is even more determined to win. Therefore, she giggles slightly, kisses his throat again, a little lower this time, then his shoulder and the back of his ear.

He releases a strange sound that must be somewhere between a groan and a chuckle. Unsuccessful, he tries to brush her off, but she can feel the heat that’s rising to his skin by the second.

Just when she leans in for the sixth kiss, he groans, tossing his controller to the side. She doesn’t recognize the emotion flashing in his earthy eyes, but she is not afraid of it. Bellamy murmurs intelligibly before giving her a gentle push to the floor — out of the camera frame — on her back, she watches his face move closer to hers than it ever has until she can almost sense the amazing warmth that pours from his features. Taking a slow breath, he nuzzles her, which has her entire chest feeling like jelly.

When their lips meet, it’s as if the living room is filled with light, though it must be nearing midnight. The happiness bubbles in her stomach, runs through her veins to mix with her bloodstream. Burying her fingers in the dark, soft curls of his hair, Clarke deepens the kiss a little, causing him to smile against her lips.

“I’m gonna have to edit this out.”

She laughs at that statement. “The video is useless now, Bellamy. We’ve both fallen off the course before the finish line.”

“Well, it was worth it.”

As opposed to sleeping that night, they sit on the bed in his room eating dry Coco Puffs while talking about where to go from there.

What they end up doing is reshooting the Mario Kart video the next day (Bellamy wins, much to her dismay), then spend the next eight months trying to hide their relationship from his online following, which is easy when she can simply not be present in his videos.

His viewers, however, are far from stupid. The first video that she appears in after the Mario Kart one is a casual writing vlog, where she brings him a cup of black coffee after his all-nighter. And it’s one tiny detail that Bellamy missed in editing that effectively exposes them:

[Top Comments - click to show]

Christine Hollinger: oh my god, he murmurs ‘thanks, babe’ at 8:46 asdjffikoxxkak… Y’ALL

863+

theo lewis: *platonically calls my roommate ‘babe’*

219+

After that, they have to come to terms with the fact that their secret is out, and because Bellamy doesn’t want to trick his followers, he decides to make the announcement (albeit casually) in his next video, which is a brief daily vlog. Bellamy turns the camera towards the balcony, on which she is standing, looking at the sinking sun.

“Isn’t she beautiful? I’m so lucky.”

No forced, half-assed video of them explaining how they got together, no cheesy girlfriend tag — just a simple yet revealing comment. Their relationship is not clickbait; it’s not something that he’s going to use to gain more followers. It’s too important for that.

[windandwater]

I have a note on my phone of various marauders headcanons, some of which made it into fic (angwrites on ao3, check me out, or don’t), some of which didn’t or haven’t yet.

but tumblr is made for shit like this so here they are. fair warning for some teenage boys using somewhat gross language towards the end of this.

james potter has a flat ass

unfortunately for his ego, james potter is also an ass man.

"butts butts butts butts" --james potter, probably

sirius acts like a wild child but has secretly been an old queen since the day he was born

"do you know long it takes to get glitter out of your ass, get that shit away from me”

(insert screeching after it gets in his hair here)

james is one of those people (men) who writes everything in all caps

peter's eyebrows always come off during games of exploding snap, even if he ducks, even if it's not his fault, even if he's not technically playing, even if he's across the castle when the cards explode. he's actually incredible at the game but no one will ever know because that's all anyone ever notices.

james's taste in women is "could beat me up". this does not stop at women he is attracted to. his female friends are no different. and he gets along very very well with lily’s friends.

james is a cheerful morning person, to the unmitigated disgust of all three of his friends, and later, his wife.

lily can keep a schedule but likes a bit of a lie-in sometimes. the rest of them would sleep until noon daily if allowed. james despairs of all of them. while whistling loudly as he burns breakfast.

james can actually cook quite well. he just forgets to turn the heat down sometimes (lily evans gave him a stern look and he got distracted, what did you expect) and makes a mess.

one of sirius’s rebellions is actually learning how to cook, to spite his parents. it takes him a few years and some guided grocery shopping, but he becomes really good after a while. everyone but remus is surprised.

remus is not surprised because he was the one who pointed out that sirius doing menial tasks would really piss off his mum. this didn’t get him to clean up his damn socks more often, but he can’t actually complain when the food’s this good.

what remus doesn’t know is that sirius sat down, did some complicated math, and realized that if he bought food, remus would feel bad for eating it, but if he made food, remus would feel bad for not eating it. 2 + 2 = the only option here is to become an amazing chef and keep his boyfriend from starving to death by sheer force of the meatballs he always craves at the full moon.

speaking of cravings, here are some food preferences:

remus can’t explain to you why he craves meatballs at the full moon. it should be a very rare steak, right? but no. meatballs. or goat curry. james knows to be on call in case it’s a curry month.

remus actually likes his food the spiciest out of the four of them, even though james grew up eating it. if the food isn’t making the other three tear up, it’s not hot enough for him.

lily is the same way.

mrs. potter adores them both

sirius, surprisingly, has the worst tolerance. even worse than peter. he won’t eat anything james makes.

sirius’s cooking also suffers a bit from the fact that he takes on the American belief that every vegetable is better when fried or covered in cheese.

unsurprisingly, peter is the one with the garbage taste buds. he’s been known to eat hot dogs dipped in melted chocolate and ice cream topped with hot sauce and mayonnaise. it’s a good thing gryffindor tower is a judgment-free zone after 1 am.

the first time Dumbledore had a spare second after finding out that the Marauders were Animaguses, he sprinted to the Infirmary to tell Madame Pomfrey (under pain of death to never tell anyone else) about the Animagus transformation and its apparent effects on lycanthropy. Remus's sudden dip in symptoms at age 15 was fucking up all her research and notes, and he knew this, and also that she'd want to know why. those notes have only recently been released to the public.

favorite bands:

lily: simon & garfunkel. also kind of a deadhead. no I’m not projecting.

sirius: led zeppelin, queen

remus: bob dylan (ugh, I know)

james: the bee gees. james is so into disco.

peter: claims to like whatever james likes at the moment. actually likes the beatles best.

gryffindor parties are fucking wild. this is known. passed out hungover gryffindors is not an unusual occurrence on any given Saturday or Monday morning. this is also known. if it is a school morning, the likelihood of them having something embarrassing written or drawn on their faces increases exponentially. here’s how it went when the following (immature, sexist, standard teenage fare) things were inscribed on the foreheads of the marauders:

james: someone was dumb enough to think that "james potter is a pussy" would embarrass him. it did not. he did alter it so that ”is a" read "eats”, then wore it proudly until it was forcibly removed.

sirius: whoever thought “sirius black sucks dick” would be funny and humiliating for him was in for a hell of a surprise about his lack of shame. he spent the day winking and blowing kisses at anyone who laughed at him. (somehow this only increased his reputation as a womanizer. he doesn’t get it either.)

peter: either of the above tactics would have worked quite well on him. unfortunately, the budding artist ran out of verbal creativity, and opted to simply draw a dick on his face. for some reason, peter had no problem with this. especially since he didn’t have class with professor mcgonagall that day.

remus: did not get drunk in the first place. did not stop the perpetrators from doing this to his friends. also did not warn them that it would go this way. this tells you everything you need to know about remus lupin.