#its just nice and friendly it makes them all seem like theyre friends and get along more

[autisticlee]

I know it's wrong and bad to say this, but sometimes I really hate when my friends have other friends. (specifically when I can't also be friends with those friends) because every time I want someone to hang out with or talk to, the only couple friends I have are always busy with their other friends. when I want to plan something with them, they will always choose the other friends over me. they will cancel plans *with* me as soon as other friends ask, but won't cancel plans *for* me when i ask. they will use up their social spoons on other friends and leave none for me. always putting things with me off or simply not responding at all.

i'm always told by random people when I say I want mkre friends "it's better to have a couple great friends than many aquantances" or something like that. but honestly it sucks because you can't rely on 1-2 people to always be there for you every day or every week when you want or need someone. if you keep asking, you're seen as annoying and clingy and they will ignore you eventually (or worse)

it's annoying that they get to fill their social needs at all times, but I never get to. because i'm never the one that gets to go first in the social queue. and when it gets to my turn, it refreshes and i'm pushed to the back again.

the only solution I can ever think of is being friends with my friends' friends too....but for some reason!!!!!! that never works out!!!! (if my friends will even share their friends with me to begin with)

[hiemaldesirae]

this is such a radiostatic coded poem and actually i think i know a way to make it worse. walk with me okay just. we're all familiar with hanahaki right.

imagine a hanahaki au where vox develops it after a messy radiostatic fallout. at first its bad- so bad in fact that rosie, who he'd done his best to cut contact with following the fallout, seemed to have noticed and sent him condolences and advice for 'getting rid of it' by simply confessing and letting out his feelings. not that he had a way to contact alastor at the time, thanks to the man's disappearance, but... deep down, he knew she had a point.

because really, theres actually quite a simple fix for hanahaki: simply confess your feelings for the object of your affection and no matter the response, the flowers slowly taking over you will slow their ascent. but vox doesn't want to. he tells himself its for alastor- tells himself that he knows alastor would only feel more disgusted with him, that it would sever the last remaining bonds between them and form an everlasting distrust on alastors mind... but in part, its also because- well.

when he feels the itch in his throat come up again, when he feels the need to run to the bathroom and hide himself away until the blood and the petals stop coming up and over and down all over the floor, when he feels himself slowly wasting away, cold and alone and unloved by the only person he's ever wanted... the tiny flowers, forget me nots and periwinkle stain the floor alongside his sinners blood. theyre the only thing left of alastor he has, now. and deep down, vox knows, its the only thing he'll ever have of alastor. theyre both too prideful to ever go back to what they had before, and even if they could.... well. would alastor even want to?

so he keeps it to himself. vel and val are the only ones other than his assistants to know- and in theory, that could work against him, seeing as while he has his contractees under lock and key, the same does not apply for his friends... but, well. it's nice to not be alone in this. nice to know that he won't be alone when he goes. nice to know that when he passes out from a particularly bad episode that he'll wake up swaddled in layers of blankets and soft quilts, that warm english tea velvette introduced to him waiting by his bedside along with the newest indulgent, trashy romance book val selected for him. it's nice. and he almost thinks he can bear with it like this-

that is, until the princess invites him to her hotel. and invites him to play friendly with alastor once more, to stay in the same vicinity as the other overlord without either of them trading sharp barbs and words with each other. and- and it's- it's nice. it's so good, to no longer be at each others throats. so nice to finally sit and talk with al, get to hear his voice without having to sneakily tune into a broadcast.

it's so nice that he almost forgets he's living on borrowed time. but of course, as all things do, life- and death, too- work their course.

it happens when he's visiting the hotel. not really the place he'd wanted to be when it happened- vox had hoped- well. he's not sure what he'd hoped. but... he'd hoped to be with velvette and valentino when it happened. to at least have the two people who understood by his side when he eventually succumbed to his own weakness. instead, it's alastor who notices first as vox's frequency goes slightly off tune, eyes widening as the flowers and the blood come up. it's alastor who sprints to vox's side first, immediately scooping the other up into a gentle hold as his shadow summons come to vox's aide. it's alastor, who grasps his hand tight as vox continues coughing, gasping and choking for breath, dribbling red blood and flower petals falling from his mouth.

alastor recognises those flowers. of course he does, he was the one who had shown them to vox.

in his delirium, with desperate hands clutching him tightly and begging him to hold on, please, please, i can't lose you when i've just gotten you back--

vox smiles.

a hand reaches out blindly, fumbling for a moment before he finds what he's looking for. bloodstained claws reach up, shaking hard as they tuck two flowers behind alastor's antlers.

i'm sorry i could never tell you, al, he laughs. it's weak. he's growing weaker, and by the panicked look on alastor's face, he can tell, too. i- i was scared. didn't- didn't wanna lose-- the last bit of you i had left. at least this way... i got to keep this part of you.

he smiles again, wider. it probably looks disgusting, with the flowers and the blood everywhere. he probably looks like a mess. but it's fine. he has to say this.

i hope you enjoy this last part of me, too.

and with that, alastor is left in the bloodstained foyer of the hazbin hotel, clutching a still body to his chest.

[conanssummerchild]

the other day i was wondering about how it would go if rick sanchez and abed nadir interacted bcs theyre my fav guys ever but i couldnt actually imagine them ever interacting and then i accidentally came up with a whole fuck ton of headcanons about what would happen if rick started visiting the study group regularly (also featuring morty :3) so i figured i might as well post them idk

(rickortys dni)

idk what rick is doing in the commumity dimension and why btw, he's just there

the hc abt rick and abed having a conversation was just like rick going on and on about some insane adventure he went on and just overall saying wild stuff and abed listening, genuinely interested, but thinking "this guy makes jeff seem well-adjusted"

at first rick always goes alone but he talks about morty all the time and the adventures they go on but he never elaborates about who morty is so everyone just assumes he's a friend of ricks and one day rick finally introduces them to him and its literally a teenage boy and his grandson lol. everyone is confused

shirley probably hates rick sm at first

morty and britta talking abt politics or ethics or smth like that :3

i imagine rick saying the f slur or smth and the family friendly sitcom study group is flabbergasted while morty is sweating bullets apologising for him lol

rick almost immediately asks if troy and abed are fucking

one time chang tried to hug rick (even though they barely knew each other, i just feel like thats something he'd do) and rick's first instinct was to pull a gun out on him and after that chang kept begging him to make him one of those guns too (he didn't)

britta tries to therapise him but eventually rick scares her off by saying something insane or "way out of her league diagnostically" as she said once and she never tries again

rick and jeff having a drink-off (rick wins)

troy alternates between thinking rick is cool and funny and being a little afraid of him

morty and troy get along and morty thinks abed is cool

morty's favourite is anne because he thinks shes so cool and smart and pretty (think like the person you looked up to as a kid, thats how morty thinks of annie) and she lets him act like a kid and doesnt put any unfair insane expectations on him (*cough* rick) because she knows what that feels like

annie dislikes rick but she keeps slipping fliers for AA into his pockets and rick is confused and incredibly annoyed whenever he finds them

rick thinks chang is weird af but finds it funny, especially bcs hes like the main antagonist of the study group and hes just some guy

rick is probably kinda mean to the dean :(

rick saying something in spanish and no one in the ex spanish study group has any idea what hes saying (they did not learn a thing)

rick thinks its kinda cool that jeff faked his degree, but he wont admit it ofc

morty loves apartment 303

annie eventually warms up to rick because he's less grumpy and rude once you get to know him and they become kiiiinda friends (but shes still a little wary of him)

rick, morty, troy, abed and annie playing minecraft together :3

shirley also eventually warms up to rick and acts like a stern parent (even though rick is almost double her age 💀) and rick pretends to hate it but he doesnt (he didnt get loved enough by his parents as a kid)

rick calls pierce the jerry of the group

abed always listens to rick infodump

abed and rick talking about alternate timelines/dimensions together

one time he fell asleep on the sofa at apartment 303 and while he was asleep annie washed his labcoat bcs its probably grimy af and rick freaked out on her and didn't visit their dimension again for a month

morty loves shirley because shes is always so nice to him and gives him baked goods bcs she thinks hes the sweetest kid ever (he is). he always defends her when rick calls her lame

ok thats it, i usually lowkey hate crossovers but here i am. doing a crossover

also ive always been scared of posting headcannons in case someone is like "FUCK YOU these headcannons are the WORST you have no understanding of these characters you dumb faggot" so erm im scared :3 bye

[p-wrryyy-mordial-soup]

Hiiii :3 heres my pack of losers (my x-rank team) because i needed ghost to actually have a team :]. heres a link to all my splatoons on toyhouse

seperate refrences, little blurbs about them and color alts where they all share eachothers colors below the thang v enjoy my word vomit idk how to write character stuff out teehee

sorry his ref is a year old and rushed for artfight </3 also the age is wrong i think i changed it to 23

he's from around where the deepsea metro is/was. had to leave because of unstable surroundings from an unknown to him cause. he's best friends with Rust and her kids, im gonna be honest i haven't actually thought through how they met and ive just realized this oops. since he spent most of his life underground and now lives in the splatlands he gets sunburnt way too frequently to not be covered up constantly, though he wears thing like tank tops and shorts during splatfest since those mostly occur during the night.

He met wisteria and ember first and then 72. they didnt apoint him as leader nor do they really care to have one but he's the tallest so everyone assumes its him. he's the most softspoken out of the 4 of them but thats a really low bar, he has a hard time making decisions but once he does he will die on that hill

(since its not on his ref like the other three)

72 escaped the metro before agent 8 went through it, he had found a memcake that was dropped after a test giving him just a clear enough mind to think for himself some. he ended up finding his way out after a while of accumulating a couple more memcakes, barely any where his though so hes walking around with memories that aren't his. It also took him a while to get used to the fact he isnt a soldier nor a test subject anymore. If he saw another sanitized mollusk he'd probably hide or run away </3.

72 met Ghost while after wandering around the area for a while, and ended up crashing in his car the whole time on ghosts way back to the splatlands (he thought 72 was like, drunk or something since he was tumbling around and seemed to be not the most coherent). he doesnt blink or breath unless hes actively thinking about it :[.

he had a hard time discerning things for a while but hes gotten better, at first he thought ember was just a weird octoling because she wears the old octoling goggles. we beat the evil soap with friendship in this house!!!

personality wise hes pretty hyper and cheerful which isnt usually your first thought upon seeing a zombie, forgot his age but hes an adult, he was encouraged to pick his own birthday :]

I have the least down for him at the moment, there will be more on her prommy </3 she's 21

She's a callie superfan with a vulgar sense of humor, usually the one who purposefully makes other players angry. born and raised in the splatlands she knows all the places to hide and get you lost in.

he's been friends with ember the longest, they where online friends until ember moved to splatsville. was introduced to ghost and 72 later by ember, he likes to antagonize 72 (think sibling antagonizing, theyre both in on it). down to fist fight you in the back of a waffle house

Originally from the inkopolis outskirts, they're 31

Ember's both a video game and turf/anarchy streamer, she has camera in their goggles for the latter. bad habit of talking in twitch/internet lingo outside of streaming. Once she has eyes on something its nearly impossible to get her to do something else. Very friendly outside fighting, will give you nice words and a pat on the back after a game whether they won or not.

met ghost while playing turf war in a random que, he was, in her words, "a bit to intense to be playing in turf" and told him after the game that he should try out anarchy, he was scared of it since he was new to the area. they ended up teaming up and playing a couple games together, later inviting wisteria and eventually 72.

theres def more to these guys but it will take me a long time to get the words in my head to cooperate 🙏im better at answering specific questions about things then coming up with what to write myself

have some color alts :3

[alienaiver]

Tales of Meet Cutes

Kozume Kenma x gn!reader

warnings: this is pretty fluffy! while reader is gender neutral, they are cosplaying male characters and are being described wearing makeup, so beware if thats not ur thing! :’) wordcount: 4.4k content: FLUFF, genderneutral reader, poc!friendly reader, canon compliant, post-timeskip, meet cute, kenma FALLS IN LOVE... HARD!, cosplayer!reader meeting kenma at a convention basically, kuroo’s the worst wingman but he swings it anyway!, kenmas a bit awkward but hes got the spirit, weirdly enough became an advertisement for the tales of games..., unbeta’d bcos i am sobbing about my con, reader cosplays mikleo from tales of zestiria and jack vessalius from pandora hearts! heres mikleo and heres jack (theres no switch release of zestiria this is just me dreaming btw </3)

notes: hihey!!! i was at a convention this weekend and have been ruDELY STRUCK by the post-con depression and its... its GIVING ME feelings. so i wrote this. im aware that conventions in japan are usually simply called ‘events’ and not cons like in the west but it felt sO UNSPECIFIC so ye. i actually do Not know what bouncing ball corp DOES... so im playing around. this is all based off of my own convention experiences but theyre obviously very local to my country so idk how it is in others <33333333 i hope u enjoy AWKWARD KENMA who stutters <3

It’s Friday afternoon and Kenma’s plugging the Nintendo Switch’s HDMI into the television’s port that the convention provided for their booth. Kuroo’s humming by their table as he places the flyers nice and orderly next to the game cases. Kenma turns to his friend, “you didn’t have to do this.” he says, flustered that Kuroo had to take a weekend off for him. Kuroo smiles, “’course I didn’t have to,” he looks knowingly at Kenma who bites his lip and stares pointedly at the floor, “but I wanted to. It’s a free convention, a weekend with my best friend plus, you’re paying me.”

It's true, Kenma has agreed to pay all of Kuroo’s meals this weekend no matter what he wanted – he knows Kuroo will seize the opportunity and ask for food he’s normally too cheap to buy himself, but Kenma’s happy to indulge.

Bouncing Ball Corp has for many years sponsored a big part of Tokyo Expo’s Game Room. It was one of the first places that properly introduced Kenma to streaming so it’s become like a silent thank you to them. The community is nice too and he knows a lot of his fans come here. For just as many years that he’s been a sponsor, they’ve tried to get him to have a booth or maybe even a panel but he’s been dodging them successfully every year. The attention seems like it’d be too much for him to handle for a whole weekend so he’s always declined and showed up stealth as a regular convention guest and enjoyed the Game Room. He was almost found out once because he beat a high score on the big center screen in front of an audience. He’s never ducked out so fast of anything in his life.

But this year’s dodging and parrying proved unsuccessful due to circumstances out of his power. You’d think running your own company would make situations like these impossible but alas. Kenma has been playing the Tales Of game series on his channel since the early beginning and after the third game, Bandai Namco reached out and they made a rather fruitful arrangement that’s served both of them well. Now, they’re releasing an anniversary Nintendo Switch release of Tales of Zestiria and wanted Kenma at the convention, advertising. He was put between a rock and a hard place when the game company reached out to the convention on his behalf – he knows they did it on purpose to render any of his moves ineffective.

So here he is, plugging the television into the massive outlet that runs through the room to accommodate every booth and game (is this even fire safety regulated?) with Kuroo by his side. One of the volunteers, a Gopher, has already stopped by multiple times to offer their assistance in setting up. Kenma thinks they might be a fan because the Game Room’s volunteer-leader has already been by upon their arrival and walked through whatever they might need from the convention and what they’ve brought themselves to the booth with him.

There’s usually not a lot of booths in the Game Room, traditionally focusing more on just having a lot of platforms and screens available with games ready to be played by the guests but it’s not uncommon to see a company or two advertise for something. At the far end, Kenma knows an indie-game developer is going to be. She’s also going to host a panel on how to make your own games and where to start. He’d like to stop by for that out of curiosity. There’s also a booth from a school where you can become a game designer who advertises for their education and tells people of the way you’ll have to go to reach that.

And then Kenma’s. He certainly feels out of place as he sets up the brand-new Switch with only one game inserted provided by Bandai Namco. He originally connects it to the Convention Center’s Wi-Fi but decides his own might be faster for the final download of the software. He hears Kuroo talk to someone behind him as he fiddles with his phone settings. The convention opens in just a few hours and he’d like to get lunch before anyone arrives. He dreads how he’ll have to be available here until at least after the dinner rush. He’ll have to eat a heavy lunch. He has a gnawing suspicion that Kuroo’s got food or snacks in his bag if the size of it is anything to go by. He hopes there’s the red bean Taiyaki that he likes in that bag. He really wants one now.

  __

  His stomach is gnawing, reminding him of that Taiyaki he imagined earlier. It’s past 7PM now and there’s been so many people that he really doesn’t want to come back tomorrow. Kuroo’s currently out, there was a tabletop event he wanted to check out and since there wasn’t that many people when he left an hour ago, he had said yes but they’re all coming back from their dinner and filling up the room again. The heat is unbearable; poor ventilation and so many machines turned on making it worse on top of the people crowding it. More than once he’s had to explain how the Switch controls work for curious guests and it’s getting repetitive in a way that he really doesn’t enjoy. Is he really an asset as a sales representative? He thinks not.

Maybe he should just take a peek in Kuroo’s bag. He probably wouldn’t mind, right?

Turns out that he definitely wouldn’t mind given that all there is in said bag is snacks that only Kenma likes and that he knows Kuroo doesn’t even the least bit pretend to enjoy. He stays crouched and rummages through it and lo behold, a red bean Taiyaki shines from the bottom of the bag. Out of the corner of his eye he spots two people nearing the booth, one whose color scheme is glaringly blue. He hears talk, someone jumping in excitement and thinks it might be an old fan of the game excited about the remake. He’s surprised by how few knows the game – it’s not that old, he keeps telling himself.

“It’s you!” a voice exclaims and with the Taiyaki hanging from his mouth, Kenma looks up with confusion and an accidental glare. Before his booth stands two people. One is dressed like an anime character from that fighting show he’s heard about and the other… Well, the other is none other than Mikleo, a character from the game he’s currently advertising. You’re standing with the game in your hands, sparkles flying from your eyes in excitement, your underlip worried between your teeth.

Kenma drops the Taiyaki from his mouth as his brain decides you’re the most beautiful person he’s ever seen.

(Luckily for him the snack lands on the bag and not on the floor. He doesn’t notice that at all though.)

“I shouldn’t buy it. I already have it at home for the PS3,” you start arguing resolutely, putting down the Switch case with much reluctance. Your friend laughs at you, “yeah that would be silly. But you were so sad about not finding any merchandise with Mikleo or Sorey on it in Dealer and Artist, so I’m glad we saw this!” you nod to your friend, eyes still glued on the game, “me too. I hope this remake will get it the revival it deserves. Maybe we’ll actually meet people who knows the game now,” you sigh before you start to continue on, “I don’t want to be late for the Tekken tournament though and if I stay here much longer, I’ll end up buying the game.” Your friend follows and you look back at the game one last time with mock sobs and an arm reached out towards it. Your friend laughs and drags you along.

Kenma stays crouched and frozen for a few more moments until Kuroo’s voice breaks through, “that cosplayer’s the character from the game, aren’t they?” his eyes are turned towards you before he looks down at Kenma, “you found the snacks?” he walks around the tables to get inside the booth, “we can go get dinner in an hour or so, is that fine?”

Kenma barely registers any of the questions that Kuroo asks him, still looking after your form. It’s easy to see where you’re going with your cosplay prop, Mikleo’s staff being his guiding star as you’re walking towards the big screen for the Tekken tournament.

Maybe he should join the tournament.

No, he definitely shouldn’t.

Right?

A palm suddenly touches Kenma’s forehead and Kuroo’s form is crouched next to him, looking only mildly concerned, “you okay? You need to get out a bit? Too many people?” the questions are many as Kuroo tries to locate what Kenma’s issue might be. It’s not a fever, so the redness in his face much be account of the crowd, Kuroo thinks. Kenma scrunches up his nose before he gets back to his feet, “I’m fine.”

Kuroo shakes his head before he picks up Kenma’s abandoned Taiyaki and gets back up, “let me know if that changes. I’d be more than happy to duck out for food early.”

Kenma reluctantly grabs the Taiyaki from Kuroo and continues to eat it in silence. Kuroo does what he does best and try to sell the game to whoever stops by even if they’re only stopping briefly. There’s an influx of people for the tournament and Kuroo manages to sell a few copies to old fans. Kenma fiddles with his water bottle as his eyes are glued towards the tournament area, hoping he’ll see you on your way out. He definitely doesn’t want to go for dinner before it ends.

  Sadly, he doesn’t see you in the crowd leaving the area, all morphed together into one blob of mass. The Game Room is finally breathable again and they get ready to leave the booth, putting up the “Out for dinner, be right back!” sign and notify the Gophers that they’re leaving so they can keep an eye on the unattended booth for them.

Kuroo wanted something from the food stalls, much to Kenma’s chagrin. Kenma doesn’t particular like going out to eat but a restaurant’s volume levels is miles apart from the food halls of an anime convention’s. The line luckily isn’t long as Kenma stands with his phone, playing Valkyrie Connect on it to pass the time. Kuroo talks to the people around them in line, blending in even though this normally isn’t his crowd.

“Ah, thank you for holding the line! It was such a bother going to the bathroom in this,” you laugh, sounding out of breath as you pat your friend’s shoulder.

Kenma’s afraid to look up because out of his peripheral he spots the blue of the bottom part of Mikleo’s pants. The tail ends of your cap sways as you move around too and he feels his tongue grow a few sizes in his mouth. Kuroo continues talking with your friend who introduces you to him.

The good thing about Kuroo, that Kenma’s always appreciated, is his uncanny way of knowing when to push Kenma’s social buttons and when not to. So Kuroo simply lets the conversation flow with the two people in front of him, not letting their focus shift to Kenma in an effort to relief him.

He chances a look at you without lifting his head and you’re even more beautiful up close. Your wig seems to be of high quality and well taken care of, even after a whole day at the convention. Kenma doesn’t know a whole lot about makeup, but he can see that yours is sharp and accentuating the parts that make you resemble Mikleo the most. You’re wearing purple contacts and Kenma’s brain is fuzzy with the thought of what your real eye color must be like. Is your hair long underneath the wig? Or short? Your face seems perfectly sculptured and he has to look back down at his game so he doesn’t pass out from the way you shine.

  “Whatcha want?” Kuroo suddenly asks Kenma and he realizes it’s already their turn. Kenma gulps loudly and shakes his head at Kuroo, hoping his blush isn’t too obvious. Kuroo nods at his non-verbal response before he orders two sets of bibimbap with two chicken bao buns. Kenma fumbles to get his wallet out of his pocket to pay for the food and Kuroo wordlessly takes the wallet from him so he can hand them the correct amount. “Anyways, have a great con!” Kuroo gladly tells you and your friend as they go to leave the queue and wait by the side for their order. Kenma stomps his feet mentally and looks you squarely in the face. Your smile is gentle and warm as he gets eye contact with you, “you’re a… b-beautiful.. Mikleo.” he stumbles over his words and hurries to join Kuroo by the side, feeling very childish with his breathing ragged and heart beating. He hears you making a reply behind him but he doesn’t make out the words as he focuses on Kuroo’s shoes and quieting his own heart.

  When he reaches Kuroo, an unfortunate but very teasing smirk is on the bastard’s lips. “So it wasn’t a fever.” He teases, ruffling up Kenma’s hair. “Shut up,” he bites back and punches Kuroo’s stomach. Kuroo leans forward in mock pain and whispers close to Kenma’s ear with a teasing lilt, “they’re still looking at you. I think they’re flustered.”

Kenma just hits him again but dares not to look back to confirm whether or not Kuroo’s right, a pout evident on his face from Kuroo’s teasing.

      Saturday morning comes around without too many hiccups and Kenma’s playing Octopath Traveler on his own Switch, precariously tipping the chair to alleviate boredom. Kuroo only teased him mildly yesterday and this morning, so he thinks he might be safe with his private crush. It’s lunch time soon and the big cosplay show is currently underway, which makes the Game Room pleasant, only a few people sitting by different platforms quietly playing games.

Kuroo’s at the cosplay show too, leaving Kenma behind. He’d offered to go together, but Kenma thinks the noises will be too much. He can always watch the show online at another date and he doesn’t technically mind manning the booth when it’s this quiet. A few fans have found out he’s here and passed by for pictures, but it hasn’t been too wild. He misses his cats even if he briefly saw them this morning.

He yawns as he finishes off one of the chapter 2 bosses, checking his battery percent as the victory screen loads. He’s still good to go for at least some time yet before he has to get up and dig the charger out of Kuroo’s bag.

“Excuse me,” your voice rings as you clear your throat and Kenma’s head whips up so fast at the sound of your voice that he loses balance and with a leg raised tall in the air, he falls backwards with a yelp that he’ll deny until the day that he passes.

“Oh my God, are you okay?” he hears the worried wobble in your tone as you shuffle around towards the little entrance to his booth but stops in front of it, unsure if you’re allowed to enter, stomping your feet anxiously. “I didn’t mean to give you such a scare, I’m sorry!”

As Kenma groans and places his Switch carefully next to him on the floor, he realizes that you’re trying to hold back a laugh at the scene in front of you, but your brows are still furrowed in worry.

You’re not Mikleo today.

He’s not sure who you are, really. He doesn’t recognize the design but then again, he hasn’t watched a lot of anime. But even if you’re in a total different outfit, with a different hair and eye color than yesterday, there’s no mistake who you are. You’re the one inflicting psychic damage on Kenma’s heart and he’s not sure how to handle this properly.

Your outfit is no less detailed or well-done than yesterday, with a blonde wig styled with a ponytail and a very exquisite-looking, long green coat lined with gold. You’re wearing a ruffled shirt underneath a black vest, knee-length boots and white pants. You must be hot in all that. He feels heat flush to his cheeks at his own staring and throws his head back to the ground, staring at the ceiling to avoid your gaze, exhaling a deep breath. You crouch down, still by the entrance to his booth and look at him, careful of the length of your ponytail – he can see now that it’s a braid. “Are you sure that you’re okay?” you ask, biting your lip in worry about how he has yet to reply to you. Maybe you shouldn’t have walked up to him at all.

Kenma tries to make his eyes meet yours but he finds that he’s not really able to. He’s frozen staring up at the ceiling, feeling his blood pump faster than he’d like. His palms are lying spread but he can feel the sweat gathering there and there’s quite a bit of saliva gathering in his mouth that he seems to have forgotten how to swallow.

“Uhm. Was it Kazu?” you look up at the ceiling to see if Kenma’s found anything interesting, “ah! Kuroo! He said you’d be here when I saw him during the show break…” there’s a pause as you seem to think about what you want to say and Kenma finds the courage to move slowly to sit up, the thought that you sought him voluntarily out replenishing his HP bar.

You follow him with your eyes, a triumphant yet tense smile on your lips at making him blush so exceedingly. He’s pretty when he blushes, you think.

“I was wondering if you’d like to… Uh, get some lunch together from the food stalls?” Kenma whips his head towards you again, his expression more constipated than positive and you raise your arms in alarm with an apologetic smile, “y-you don’t have to of course! Kuroo just suggested that you might be hungry and well… I am too, but my friend didn’t want to miss the award ceremony so I thought… maybe… you’d like to? We could talk about the Tales of games, if you’d like?”

Kenma nods and looks away to regain control of his voice, “I’d like to, let me just close up here before we leave,” he says and a new excitement rises in him from being able to speak a whole sentence without stuttering to you. He chances a look at you he feels like he shouldn’t have because the smile that adorns your features is absolutely breath-taking and Kenma feels his heart stutter at brightness in front of him. You move to get up and dust off your thighs before reaching out to him, “need a hand?”

  The walk to the food stalls isn’t as awkward as Kenma feared it’d be with his newfound inability to compose proper sentences. You let the conversation flow freely and naturally, filling in when his answers are stunted. You’re so calm and patient that Kenma finds himself opening up more naturally as you reach the stalls, taking a walk through the area to figure out what you’d like. Kenma also learns that you’re dressed as a character from Pandora Hearts today, a character named Jack. “Don’t get the curry,” you warn in a whisper-voice and lean in close to continue what Kenma supposes is gossip but his heart is beating so loud in his ears he barely hears why you issued such a warning in the first place. He simply nods and trots along, hands buried deep in his hoodie’s pockets.

You settle on the food stall that sells pizza slices. It’s a small food truck with a pizza oven inside that Kenma’s frankly fascinated by. There’s not a lot of options that he likes on their menu and he feels embarrassed to order something where half of the ingredients needs to be taken off in front of you but he would also like to be able to eat said food in front of you.

When it’s your turn in the line, Kenma motions for you to go first and as he hears your order, his mind immediately relaxes – he’s not the only one with special requests to remove certain ingredients. As it turns out, you end up wanting the same exact pizza as him, so he taps your shoulder and quickly asks if you want to change it from two separate slices and just share a regular sized pizza. Your eyes shine at his question and you nod excitedly before turning towards the cook on the other side who happily takes the new order.

  You’re seated in front of each other with the pizza between you, the conversation flowing naturally and freely between games. “Have you ever played Fire Emblem?” Kenma asks through a bite of pizza and you hum through your chewing, “not yet. I only recently got my hands on my own Switch and that’s my first Nintendo console so I think it’ll take me a while to rack up my arsenal,” you laugh and Kenma nods, “you could always watch a stream of it?” he tentatively ask and you shake your head and put down your slice of pizza to take a sip of your drink, “I can’t really concentrate on streams… they’re kind of boring,” you admit with a sheepish laugh and Kenma’s back straightens as he tries not to take it personally. It’s technically not a big deal and he usually isn’t bothered by whether or not people would like him but he has a very deep-seated need for you to like him right now.

“What do you do on the daily? Outside of cons?” you ask after you’ve swallowed your last bite of pizza, “something with sales?”

Kenma raises a confused eyebrow at you and you laugh apologetically, “I just thought maybe for Bandai? Since you’re selling their game at the con.”

That’s when Kenma realizes.

You have no idea who he is.

And hey, Kenma isn’t that conceited that he thinks everyone knows him but with all the games you have the same interests in, he’d figured you at least knew his name or something of the sort. He also had a tiny drop of fear that you might just be seeking him out due to his status. He’s not sure he wouldn’t just let you, given how infatuated he is with you. What a wonderful way to get played, he absentmindedly thinks.

He's glad it seems to be in a whole other alley. You might just be interested in him for him.

“I uh, I own a company.” He tries not to sound like too much of a jerk but the sentence makes it hard to not sound high and mighty, no matter how he’d said it. Your eyes widen and you slap your palms onto the surface of the table, “that’s so cool!” you exclaim and Kenma tries to will down a blush. “What kind of company?”

He must look like a deer in the headlights to you because you shrink in on yourself and apologize for prying. He’s not sure why he didn’t expect such a follow-up question but his brain malfunctioned at the way your eyes shone. You’re wearing contacts again today, bright green and making your eyes seem bigger than they actually are. There are golden lashes lining your eyes and once again your makeup best accentuates what he believes fits the character because it’s different than it was yesterday but still just as sleek and beautiful. He hitches a breath before he can properly reply, “uh, it’s called… Bouncing Ball Corp.” he admits with a hand scratching the back of his neck.

Realization seems to dawn on your face as your eyes narrow, seemingly in deep thought. Then your mouth opens in an ‘o’ shape before you burst out laughing, a hand to your stomach. Kenma’s sitting like a duck, watching you go through all of these motions, confused as to what they might mean. Then, you wipe a stray tear from your lash line and apologize for your outburst, “it’s just. Oh my God, please apologize to your friend. When we met him at the show…” you laugh again, trying to breathe calmly, “I thought he was trying to hit on me because he started talking about knowing some kind of CEO and a streamer. My friend knew who it was but I didn’t and he seemed embarrassed that I didn’t. Oh God,” you’re still laughing, hiding your face behind your hand as Kenma puts two and two together.

That blathering idiot.

How many times does Kenma have to tell Kuroo not to be his wingman? He groans as he hides his face on the surface of the table, letting out strings of apologies on behalf of his friend. “I’m so sorry he’s just… like that,” Kenma bites out as he raises his head back up, licking his front teeth. You wave your hand with a smile, “don’t worry, don’t worry. He seems… fun. And he really seems to care about you.”

Kenma nods and plays with the woody veins on the table, unsure what to say when you grab his hand, “but you can thank him for his meddling, I think. It got the two of us talking, right?”

Kenma’s body seems to freeze at the contact as he feels the warmth of your hand in his. Your eyes look hopeful as you worry your lip between your teeth, a half-smile on your face. Kenma smiles in what he hopes is a reassuring way as he squeezes your hand back with a courage he hadn’t felt in a while, “yeah, I’ll be sure to treat him to a nice dinner later. But I think I’d like to treat you to one first.”

You giggle as you look down at the table in front of you, “that’d be lovely. But I think you need to see me out of cosplay before you decide, don’t you?” you ask with nervousness teetering in your lilt. Kenma shakes his head, “I cannot imagine that you’re not beautiful underneath your costume. Besides, your personality’s what’s important and I like that a lot already.”

The smile you send his way make his heart pump again. Yeah, he definitely needs to thank Kuroo, no matter how stunted his attempt were, it ended up working.

[eternadreeblissa]

I've been getting into Sonic for a smidge so here's some hcs on how Sonic, Shadow, Silver and Mighty the Armadillo react to Ava for funsies

If I'm gonna have to rank, I'd have to say the fastest to like her and fall for her to least would be: Silver, Shadow, and Sonic. I haven't figured out Mighty's yet but we'll explore that here later! If I get the characters kinda OOC/Off-key though, i'm sorry. I'm a lil rusty since I havent been in the fandom and stuff for a bit since... Sonic colors?? I forgot but yeah sghdfgjsfgjuf Might get back just to re-analyse the characters and get their arcs and stories right.

Anyway we start off with Silver :D

Oh beloved. He started off nice and friendly with her but ofc didn't exactly trust her just yet. Guy came from an apocalyptic future or some timeline whatever. Terrible times. But despite all that is so optimistic, hopeful and driven... Love him.

The Ava i'm having over in this story is the overseer Ava; not quite Goddess yet, but a very powerful one and is more enigmatic and mysterious.

Anyway, I think he was quite curious of her. She lives in this enchanted forest? Alone? By herself? Oh wait she has lil chao friends! And spirit wisps too? Well at least she's protected. But either way, yeah he's a lil curious. If there's anything else he noticed about her though is that she loves her lil small friends, and not just that, the other lil critters and animals big and small are fond of her and seem to respect her. The environment seems.. More magical and react to her presence. Something Silver is amazed by. I bet he asked her a ton of questions just cuz he was so fascinated by her.

It's when he saw Ava caring for the animals and nature and how sweet and caring she is did Silver felt like he liked her. Not necessarily attracted just yet, but just like her as a person, you know?

Next we kick off with Shadow XD :DD

Shadow was definitely on guard with her, but also intrigued. As the ultimate lifeform with powers I don't fully remember its whole list about asides that he has a lot of capabilities and skills, I can say for sure bro sensed Ava to have something in her: he feels a mysterious power, a force, to her. Her aura was alien. Like something foreign, not from this world type of thing. He has this sense she's not exactly from here and the environment seems to react with her, as if drawn to her in some way. But she doesn't seem to be a threat... She's nice, kind and compassionate to those around her. Still, while she seems harmless, her aura and her... Influence he can't put a finger on is smth he feels he shouldn't exactly ignore just in case. For all he knows she might become a threat and he can't let that happen.

So... He kinda stalks her??

A little. Last I remember guy works at G.U.N so he doesn't necessarily have all the free time in the world to do that and, while he does wanna keep an eye on her, she's not that high in the danger or priority list... It's just a lil gut feeling or hunch you know? A feeling that doesn't exactly scream danger, but just for him to make sure she really isn't a threat just as she seems to appear. So I guess he comes around watching her every... Once a week? Twice? Sometimes if he feels he hasn't checked in on her for a long time he might send out Rouge or Omega to watch her (theyre absolutely confused tho and have no idea why he would want them to look after her... Except maybe Omega who also sensed smth w his scanning whatnot?)

Bcs of that, he learned quite a lot of things about her. If there's any way to describe it, this gal could definitely pose a threat should she ever decide to.

He's seen her disappear from his sight a lot, and later learned she can teleport. But she barely if ever makes a sound; the only traces of it are lightly carried by wind; if he wasn't in its direction, he may not have heard her leave at all. He also notes that she has a lot of friends who could help her and assist her, and often times when danger was around, like a monster or robots, said friends, the ones who are more capable and stronger at least, dealt with them. And he's learned they sometimes even come in hordes, otherwise, many are hiding within the trees and leaves. Like they ambushed their threat. It's a deadly but efficient method of keeping themselves safe.

And that was just her friends in action. She must be very cunning or some significant person to have all these animals and creatures follow her every command without any use of force whatsoever. But he didn't need to know the full details to get the memo she can be a dangerous individual.

Either way... She's intriguing. Shadow got interested in watching her go about her life when he has nothing in his hands. It became.. A weird hobby. Rouge and Omega started teasing him that he's crushing on her or smth XDD Oh yeah did Rouge and Omega also learn how potentially dangerous Ava could be? Well not upfront like Shadow surely. They probs only heard bits of it from Shadow but the full picture hasn't really caught with them.

It wasn't until Ava wasn't in her home in the enchanted forest, somewhere beyond it, dunno. Maybe in some desert or a town? without her friends in sight or hiding around anywhere, and was surrounded by tons of eggman's robots for some reason, did he finally came and meet her, by destroying and beating up said robots and saving her.

Shadow was fascinated with her skills yes, but he supposes that she's a bit too reliant on her friends. Because he didn't see any sort of action or movement from her to attack those robots. They were about to hurt her if he didn't do anything, so he had to step in. After the robots were turned into metal scraps littering the ground, he turns to her like: "You can't always rely on others to help you and sit around and wait. You have to find your own strength and help yourself." Sorta rough tough love advice thing. And then he left her.

After some time, watching her as usual, she got caught in another sort of trouble again. But Shadow couldn't step in; actually he finds he didn't need to. Ava was simply standing there, looking unfazed and unwavering with the foes facing her, and seems to only talk and have her enemy be angered or fearful. Either way, they tried lunging themselves at her, but instead of Ava steps out of the way, or dodges. There was more talking and less moving and hitting. But Shadow noticed her often confusing her enemies and suddenly, he and her enemies finds Ava being the one in control of the situation or has higher ground that the enemy couldn't deny or face, and is forced to leave with Ava unscathed.

He had to come down from behind her, remarking smth like: "It seems you some backbone by yourself after all. I underestimated you."

Ava turns to him. "It's flattering to know you came out all the way from afar just to say that to me."

He blinks in surprise. "So you knew I've been here this whole time?" But her friends weren't with her at all. He's sure of it. He triple checked the area and everything.

Ava simply smiled.

Shadow was impressed.

He started showing himself more to her after that, and took a liking to her then.

WOOO ahem, Shadow was embarrassingly long. Did not anticipate to ramble an entire marathon with this guy 🧍‍♀️, my bad. The words tumbled out and the ideas were running a waterfall haha 🥹 But Ok. Man—

This was a doozy to ramble through @@ ig this'll be a two parter thing KFBKDBDKDBDK Thx for reading, to those who did at least, especially the ones who went until the end. Id appreciate if you reblog if thats fine 👍

[blackfairy312]

What traits are each of them most attracted to? What/who is their biggest inspiration.

🔥oh boy an attraction, invlvong MY fucking ocs this is great.

Komi obviously has bad taste in men, like oh my god woman please theres somethig wrong with you but thats alright i guess. like idk how to decribe it but like, so likem you know. idk. like. ? blonde men seem to be a type, like Albert Wesker, andlike William Birkin, but also like bitches with mental disorders i guess idk DSM5 bitches like Amanda Young and probably the Trickster from Dead by Daylight fame. and like , Scaramouche is on there, which says something for sure. about here type, so foes like Maxwell from Dont Starve fame. Reigen Arataka is on this list and so is Osomatsu Matsuno from fucking Osomatsu-San is on this list and he is like, idk man hes on that go look at his wiki, aslo like everyone Komi has ever dated EXCEPT FOR TWO are on theVillians wiki which is insane because one of them is fucking MIGUEL OHARA. wild. i hope she gets therapy.

as for the others, uhm, Vincent is bisexual so like he knows what he likes. im not going into any more detail than this. dont ask me about what this pervert likes. hes a freak.

Antonio and Richard are GAY so like . tbh theyre probably like attracted to SANE people or something? idk Antonio seems like the guy to like, idk maybe someone who's nice to him? like SOMEONE WHO LIKE GENUINELY SEES THEBEST IN HIM AND WILL SUPPORT HIM becuase hes never had that ever growing up so its bizzare to him that someone out there genuiely CARES about him and CARES ENOUGH TO BE LIKE HIS FRIEND. GEUINE FRIEND. and if theyres a guy... yeah . Yaoi. (im a gay man I MAKE THESE JHOKES ALL THE TIME)

Richard i didnt answer bc idk man have you ever sen the Stranger Things fandom? so like. He's Steve Harrington and he needs to find his Jonathan Byers OR Eddie Munson before its too late ... it is too late btw he died lol

their biggest inrpiratons? Komi's is her half-kind of? sister? Ayano from KagePro and im not going into all that just read her carrd or assume that i will address this later in more detail ebcause again this is an OC we've had for over 6 years so her lore is all over the place and shes not a dedicated fandom OC SHE GOES EVERYWHERE.

Vincent? idk. some big name hollywood actor . or somethibg. probably a few. im not going to indulge him by looking one up for an example bc the only movies i watch are shitty horror/slashers or marvel movies and smetimes ill watch like, idk a disney movie if im feeling freaky. idk whyy i said freaky

Richard idk soem fucking sports guy probablt i kinda want to make ajoke with Richard that he APPEARS to be a CIS STRAIGHT WHITE HETEROSEXUAL MAN but hes such a fucking himbo that he probably doesnt even fucking realize that hes GAY and im not saying like hes, idk talking to women I MEAN HE DOESNT REALIZE THAT WOMEN LIKE HIM. MAUBE. LIKE HE OBVIOUSLY, TO HIM, LIKING MEN IS NORMAL HES UST OBVLIOUS WHEN SOMEONE OF THE OPPOSITE SEX/GENDER IDK FLIRTS OR HITS ON HIM andhes like thibning theyre friendly and so hes friendlyback? LIKE THAT JOCK DUDE FROM PARANOMAN, thats Richard. he probbaly has a boyfriend or a crush on someone idk. too bad he died.

Antonio probably looks up to like, idk, a super hero or some fictional character like if he lived long enough to see Star Wars, he would attach himself to Han Solo. i dont really know many people/characters PRE-1970s and the Rat/Cat/Puppeteer ALL DIED IN LIKE in the span of 1961 and 1963 probably, i think Vincent died in prison a year or two after the events of FNAC 3. so. but yeah.

[starscelly]

curious about early days vibes for the flying stars if you have more thoughts about that. like it sounds like they go from being two sets of two weirdos to being a set of four weirdos all together and that seems like it would be a bit of a process

oh it is. absolutely a Whole process. like already the friendship btwn robo and otter with roope is. weird. because those two have their own longer history and um. deeper. connection. but roope is good and has amazing stage presence and promised them a bassist so they kind of. brute force their way through it.

and roope isn’t Bad company, he’s just. not the easiest to connect to? and they think it’s a language barrier thing, or maybe he’s just like that but no. his english is like great for the most part and he seems silly and fun with his other friends. but they find out after playing together a bit that he and robo have Electric chemistry. like their styles play off each other really well in every way. so while roope still absolutely fucking refuses to give into north american ideas of politeness (why would i ask how you are if i don’t care. just because we’re in a space together for a few minutes doesn’t mean we have to introduce ourselves when we’re strangers. dont talk to me) he does let them in a bit more over the few weeks they exist pre-miro.

and then they find out miro isn’t just a random bassist he knows Here but a bassist from Back Home. like finland home. and they’re like??? maybe we should meet him first? like call or text or something at least? is he already flying out here?? wdym you dont know anyone else more. idk. in america? and roopes like. okay shut up no he’s good. you’ll see you’ll get it. and also yeah he already booked his flight soo. and then when miro Does finally get to the states and they organize a little meet up it completely changes their perspective on roope because like. okay they thought they made Progress. they cracked through that shell and could unlock the roope they saw with his other friends. Wrong. they saw roope mostly with american friends. they are not prepared for the loud ass rapid fire finnish that he and miro break into, or the clear ease in the way they interact, in general and physically. and theyre like :/ oh maybe we didnt unlock shit and this is gonna be awful and awkward as we feared.

so despite the fears that miro is gonna be as stand offish as roope felt at the start, they actually get along really well with him off the bat, like he comes off much friendlier, and sure he’s a little quiet but its not like. Concerning. and roope was right. he IS really good and they DO get it. for the first little while it is for sure like, two separate weird duos that just kind of seem friendly with each other - not helped by the fact that miro is living with roope while otter is sorting out school stuff and robo is in and out of the state for a bit - but once they’re all able to Solidly be together otter realizes like. wait a fucking minute. miro isn’t nice. roope hasn’t gotten nicer. they’re just Secretly being assholes together.

this realization of course brought on when robo asks possibly the dumbest shit he’s ever heard in his life during practice and miro just hits him with a “yeah of course (:” as if he doesn’t deserve to get torn apart for saying it. and wow miro says that a lot. they thought it was a weird filler but No he’s just making fun of them to their face and roope is just giggling along with him. and ofc when this is called out miro is like “no no i was just trying not to hurt ur feelings 🤗” and even if that was believable roope starts blowing up his spot chuckling anyways So.

so once That is put out there things sloowly start clicking into place because they’re like. okay we get your stupid sense of humor now. we can work with this. and miro IS more willing to conform to american politness which probably soothes otter’s midwestern soul a little. and because of this they do find it easier to get close to miro, and through like. osmosis or whatever robo and otter grow on roope as well. and it Cannot be denied that robo and roope’s insane chemistry on stage can be carried on offstage….. to say the least .

so basically through the powers of being so stubborn and gay and mean. they can all b friends <3 and maybe friends who kiss <3

[spacedhead]

homestuck reread #13 act 6 p4

still in these conversations where the kids reveal their true feelings about each other except not TO each other but to someone else. this dirk one is so true though roxy has been the goat of their session and the one fucking thing holding them all together. god i love roxy

wow so cool they all ascended at the same time! surely nothing bad will happen immediately after

theyre finally arriving. holy shit . theyre COMING THROUGH THE WINDOW. JOHN AND JADE

yeah ok so jade showed up and her and jane immediately got turned evil

DAVE AND KARKAT HIIII

this is a CLASSIC dave/karkat mess around. if you know, you KNOW . shit had me ROFLing.

holy davesprite . i havent seen this mf since like RIGHT AFTER cascade. literally its been eons

TRUEE i think its a strider lalonde thing they looove to go on and on about random bullshit

hey its these bozos what up yall

waitt theyre being friendly to each other? breath players CAN get along!!! this is huge news. especially for me.

this actually would be a hard ass shirt fr i need that shit

this is the reaction i get when i bring up minestuck to my friends... and im like guys please its actually fun i promise... .(im lying)

yo its the fan trolls what uppppp

okay nice meeting you

this is all very silly :D

OH GOD WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU. WHY DO YOUHAVE EYES.... WHAT THE FUCK I DONT LIKE IT I DONT LIKE IT I ACTUALLY HATE IT GET IT OFF GET IT OFF

YES!!!!!!!! OKAYYYY TAVROS!!! stand up for yourself girl you are serving like crazy right now. i think maybe this is more meaningful than when he tried to kill her, cause that was just a too little too late type of thing where he wouldnt have actually accomplished anything by succeeding, and also had no chance of doing so. BUT realizing his CONFIDENCE and his FREEDOM actually is meaningful and it will accomplish things later on!!! :D YAY TAVROS

insane behavior

i think i agree with john here, i dont think it is out of line for him to hesitate in giving you the life ring. you dont have to be a good person to be a hero. but you do have to do... heroic things? like, ever? maybe once in your fucking life? when is the last time ANYTHING you did could be considered "heroic?" when you were alive, all you did was make everyone around you suffer. they had to kill you just to make sure you didnt doom them all. when youre dead, sure youre hunting down a weapon to kill the big bad monster, but you dont even seem to care about the millions of troll lives you are mind controlling against their will to be bait for your big mission. who the hell are you trying to save? the heroes that are alive in this story literally NEVER encounter the version of the villain that you are trying to stop. whats more, this big plan to use the your ghost army FAILS because the one who was doing basically ALL the legwork mind controlling most of the ghosts ditches you, and the only reason you still have an army by the end is because the guy you fucking bullied the whole time when you were alive (and a lot of the time you were dead) BAILS you out by ACTUALLY being a hero and a genuinely good person that doesnt need to MIND CONTROL PEOPLE to get them to follow him. look. i understand everything you are saying. about not having time to deal with the morals and ethics of what you are trying to accomplish. because the ends justify the means. but the thing is that NONE of it matters. YOUR PLAN FAILS. YOU GIVE UP and have an actual SATISFYING character arc. then it gets retconned and the main version of you goes back to being Worse. and then her plan...? succeeds? i guess? if succeeding means literally EVERY ghost in the army gets obliterated, the secret weapon deploying the four beta kids who are almost all killed by LE, and randomly davepeta being the one to throw him as well as themself into a blackhole. i guess if that counts as success, then congrats. you didnt even get to see that happen though, because you got ejected from the fight frame one. HOPE IT WAS WORTH IT!

anyway... what was i doing. oh yeah look at this. this is a bit sad

okay this is pretty real. even if it is nonsensical, and maybe a little bit problematic?

me talking about myself three images ago

i like this panel. poor john cannot find his friends

this is a very cool panel as well

FAWK

YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO worlds most epic meetup

my worst nightmare

fucking scary ass motherfucker please get a grip. also brown contacts .

GOD. ROXY IS SO FUCKING REAL AND TRUE. THEYRE ACTUALLY MY GOAT ITS SO FUCKING INSANE HOW MUCH I LOVE ROXY

well. things are pretty bad right now! jade is evil jane is evil everyone is on random planets with no memory of how they got there john is missing. if i didnt know any better this might seem like the beginning of something really bad . but what do i know. anyway catch you on the next one. or catch me? joff i will see you next time. ok joff bye joff

[siriusblackdevotee]

"we love your Ted talk" we all say in unison.

Its the Barty effect, Barty x any character always gives you the most interesting ships. Lily? James? Sirius? Evan? Regulus? Add in Barty to the mix and now you have a chaotic ship.

LOWKEY...Evan and Remus are giving moonwater..but like, so much more background? Like I literally agree with you, moonrose tend to be the quiet ones, the ones that sit back and observe, the ones that can get away with being in the background. Yes, no wonder they can communicate without communicating, theyre so obsessed with watching the other they know each other's tiniest ticks.

It starts with Remus being curious with how Evan fits in the it-girl Slytherin friend group. Dorcas is obviously magically the strongest of their entire school despite her age, Regulus the most influential and wealthiest, Barty had a bit of those but hes mostly the academic weapon, Pandora was the social butterfly, not because she was nice but because you physically cannot be rude to hear because of her Aura. So what does Evan bring? He doesn't seem to be good at anything so how can he sit there and seem like he belonged?

This is definitely Remus's insecurity speaking, if it wasn't obvious. You don't have to talk about the duo starboys James and Sirius to know the world literally revolves around them. Born smart, athletic, attractive and occasionally, friendly. Peter, like Pandora, was a social butterfly but didn't have some Aura. He was just naturally a good friend, sweet, attentive to details, helpful, brought you customized gifts, so people genuinely wanted to be his friend.

But Remus? He didn't have any of that. He worked hard for his grades, he could never look handsome, the scars from his childhood ruined any chances of that, no point in becoming athletic when his body tears itself down every month anyways. From the start, his lycanthropy made it impossible for him to have any social expectations, he expected years of social isolation, people avoiding him for his sickly nature and scars. For that, he doesn't even think people want to be friends with him, besides the mauraders (everyone has a friendcrush on him, why is he so insecure) So him having the mauraders made him grateful, a bit too grateful, he felt as if he didn't deserve them.

So when Remus observes the Slytherins, he can't help but notice how similar they are in the context of their friend groups. Except well, Evan was attractive unlike him, he wasn't sure why he kept noticing that particular detail but more importantly, unlike him, Evan always seemed as if he belonged there and Remus wants to know how. What made him special?

Well it can't be because he's gorgeous? Remus understood but the other Slytherins were somewhat pretty too?

And well, luckily for Remus, Evan is wondering the same thing about him. Because they're both insecure little shits who don't realize their friends would literally die for them!! And they spend the whole time observing each other!! Notice each other's strengths that they were oblivious to!! And then fall in love because "no one has ever said that about me"!!

I love that bitchkiller and moonrose are total opposites. Moonrose is the calm, emotion centric relationship, built on healing eachothers insecurities. Bitchkiller? yeah no it's chaos here (the Barty effect)

sorry for the word vomit, I love them so much they make me ill.

Fuck gryffindors!

*A pissed Evan storming into the common room*

Pandora: Never seen you look this upset, what happened?

Evan: This same guy keeps borrowing the books I need for my project and he's a Gryffindor! Since when do Gryffindors read? honestly fuck them!

Dorcas, who fucks a blonde Gryffindor after quidditch matches to "relieve stress" (they're figuring it out):

Regulus, who's been dating the head boy Gryffindor secretly for months now and fucks rather frequently:

Barty, who gets high with and fucks on the daily with regulus's very Gryffindor brother: cheers.

*Pandora assessing all their reactions*: ...I sense a disturbance

*Evan not noticing because he was too busy thinking of getting his books and Definitely Not about the scarred blonde Gryffindor boy that took said books"

[thatone-highlighter]

I think Finn and pb being friends over reincarnations is really sweet tbh, (or I guess specifically Finn’s reincarnations) and I think it just adds on to them becoming more friends than anything else over the series ? Like at the start finn sees pb as a crush/boss more but over time He does see her as a very good friend !! Also like u said !! I think part of this is also seeing Finn n jake n stuff call pb Bonnie more ? It’s nice I really just like Finn and pb’s friendship, like how in the finale pb kisses Finn on the cheek platonically and like !! It isint weird or anything !! Idk if I am explaining my feelings well but idk you get what I mean most of the time.

I actually didnt know that Finn’s other incarnations were also friends with PB but ur right that is really cute and sweet

The way their dynamic changes over the series is really nice. I like where theyre at now i really liked that episode where they were at that party and then just. Left and chilled and hung out together it was nice. And then also the seeing eyes oke where Finn just sees her as like, his friend and she was just in casual clothes, makes it seem like he sees her a lot more as his equal now.

I think also as much as finn has taken PB off that pedestal he had her on to start with i think Bonnie also sees Finn as her equal a lot more now, i think she respects him a lot more now and the way theyve changed in treating eachother has made it easier for the other to change as well. This is getting hard to explain but u get it i think

I get what u mean, if that sorta thing had happened at the start of the series (i think it does) it would have been like a Whole Thing but at this point where they’re at with eachother its just. Not.

The overall swap with so many character from calling them their titles to using their actual names is something that is so special to me. Like you have Simon and Bonnie as the obvious ones but its also a lot more explicit in, i cant remember what the ep is called but when Flame Princess tells Bonnie her name is Pheobe and its like a Thing where she wont tell her what her name is until after shes proven she can be trusted and its like a trust and closeness thing. Finn also started calling her Pheobe but i don’t know where he got it from he just Did that but its nice too

Anyways yeah Finn and PB’s friendship is so nice and im glad they’re friends now over whatever idolisation knight thing was going on at the start of the series

[cuz-reasons]

Me: While I personally have no problem with masks, I can understand why others may have issues breathing while wearing them for extended periods of time as it is an extra layer covering your breathing holes and I dont want to be disrespectful of that

Customer at work after waiting about 3 mins tops as I make her two drinks: I'm going to step outside for a moment since it's hard for me to wear a masks for longer than 5 mins

Me, about to put the straws in her drinks, internally: if I can wear a mask and run around in this hot cafe for 4 hours you can wear yours for one more second without being a baby about it

[plasma-packin-mama]

i did a silly little chart of the relationships between the companions and delilah!!! (and benny is here). i know this isnt super interesting but sometimes u just make posts for yourself

some specific notes bc theres more nuance to their relationships and i like talking about my story LOL:

Boone and Arcade: they dont really agree on a lot, and they sort of grind each others gears. but theyre the two most important people in delilahs life so they've learned to respect one another. at the end of the day theyre not friends, but they know they can count on one another.

Boone and Lily: everyone on the team loves lily, but boone gets along with her best. he likes helping her cook and take care of the house, and listening to her talk about her life. Lily thinks that Craig is a nice, helpful young man :) during the postgame lily and boone are a common team to go on missions for New Vegas together!!

Arcade and Cass: Cass thinks arcade is pompous and judgemental. Arcade thinks Cass is rude and small minded. They're constantly sniping back and forth, and they're the only two on the team who seem to actually not like each other.

Raul and Veronica+Cass: they're the only two on the team who Raul can just chill and have a drink and a conversation with. (Delilah and Lily don't drink, Edie is a robot, Boone doesn't talk, and Arcade is somehow more annoying drunk than he is sober.) These three don't necessarily agree on everything, and they might not be friends in another world, but as it stands they all really enjoy each other's company.

Arcade and Veronica: they have so much in common I think everyone already agrees that they're besties forever. Veronica is friendly and sweet enough that she puts in the work to get over arcades awkwardness and break down his walls with her big power fist, and they just get along really well. Arcade sees his younger self in her, and wants to protect her (even tho he really doesn't feel qualified to be any kind of mentor or guide to anyone about anything). Veronica likes annoying arcade on purpose bc it's funny watching him get all >:0 grumpy. She's also the one who insists on including him when the group hangs out, much to Cass's chagrin.

Benny: if youre one of the people who has sent me asks about bennys role in delilahs story, i promise im GOING to explain. but not yet lol. its one of the most complicated dynamics in delilahs story and i want to show it through comics rather than just trying to explain awkwardly. i hope knowing that everyone but delilah wants to put him in a blender is somewhat satistying in the meantime. (thank you for asking about my story i ksis you on the forehead)

I love the characters in NV so much.. I have so many thoughts about them

[thehoundwrites]

I find it very cute that Yelena is aroace and Natasha bi because I'm both (well, I'm pan technically but the spirit is here). Have you any thoughts, headcanons about gender neutral reader being best friends with the Romanov sisters? Maybe reader is a spy too, or the "I have everything you need and contacts everywhere" person. Hope you have a good day :]

AYO!! I love aro rep bc I am aro!!! I also totally love romance in theory and then it happens and i'm like lol okay bestie ahha! But like the thought of being in a relationship with Characters who also suck at romance is cool asf! Like i love you but ITS WEIRD AND ROMANCE IS WEIRD but hey i dislike you the least!

YES

Gn!Reader x Romanoff sisters (platonic) [Being their contact]

undercut for longpost!

You probably met Nat first, since she was free from the red room. Out of their control. She was always kind, always friendly. But she was very clearly paranoid. She was always holding her tongue and you could tell. You'd end up hooking her up with lil extras. After all you heard about Dreykov. The girls. And these were only just rumors. You could only imagine the horrors she's been through. But everyone had horrors these days, And you were no stranger to ghosts from the past.

You came early one day, with a ride for her. And she absolutely wasn't expecting you. Well you guessed by the knife that just barely missed your head.

She was clearly upset. "What are you doing I almost killed you!?"

You were not expecting to get your head nearly chopped off, so you were at a loss for words. She came up to you and pulled the knife out of the tree you were standing by.

"i didnt get you right?"

"No, No I- I'm fine, i just came back with some more rations, and hitched a ride. Youre going to be leaving soon so thought i'd make it easier"

She was a bit suspicious of you, thought you were being nice with intentions. She invited you in for the night. You hesitantly accepted, but despite your training you knew there was know way you could really fend off a black widow let alone Natasha. The avenger.

But it went way better, the two of you drank and put an old movie in the background neither of you could focus on. Neither of you talked about your pasts nor did you want to.

It had been a couple months since she needed you last. you never got a letter but she was a busy women. None of your other clients were as kind as her, you never really spent time with any others anyways.

You knew there were other widows but when Nat showed up with her sister you were conflicted. You felt bad for them, not quite pity, I mean they were amazing and strong. But it never quite sat right with you. What happened to them.

Yelena had mentioned more about their past than Nat did, she seemed more apathetic. Like "yeah it happened lmao lets drink" where nat was more broodish in a way, not really able to look you two in the eyes. You thought she looked guilty.

The first time the three of you hung out was very awkward, but yelena in a very wow fuck this tone was the first to speak.

"This is stupid, i need a drink" She made comments of how unusually nice you were to them, when Nat chimed in with yeah. "Theyre my friend Yelena" That mad eher raise her eyebrows for a moment before returning to her usual snarky nature, "Who would be friends with you, you're so quiet. Not boring. Buuuut boring."

Sisters...

You couldn't help but to snort at that. So that's where the humor in the family went to. But you laughing seemed to make Yelena in a better mood. But earned a glare from Nat.

"Im sorry, shes funny"

"Ah, you like that, huh" Yelena smirked handing you the bottle she had in her hand. "You drink right?" You nodded and took it taking a few swigs,

You knew there were other widows but when Nat showed up with her sister you were conflicted. You felt bad for them, not quite pity, I mean they were amazing and strong. But it never quite sat right with you. What happened to them.

Yelena had mentioned more about their past than Nat did, she seemed more apathetic. Like "yeah it happened lmao lets drink" where nat was more broodish in a way, not really able to look you two in the eyes. You thought she looked guilty.

The first time the three of you hung out was very awkward, but yelena in a very wow fuck this tone was the first to speak.

"This is stupid, i need a drink" She made comments of how unusually nice you were to them, when Nat chimed in with yeah. "Theyre my friend Yelena" That mad eher raise her eyebrows for a moment before returning to her usual snarky nature, "Who would be friends with you, you're so quiet. Not boring. Buuuut boring."

Sisters...

You couldn't help but to snort at that. So that's where the humor in the family went to. But you laughing seemed to make Yelena in a better mood. But earned a glare from Nat.

"Im sorry, shes funny"

"Ah, you like that, huh" Yelena smirked handing you the bottle she had in her hand. "You drink right?" You nodded and took it taking a few swigs,

It took a few visits but Yelena did end up opening up a bit, but as she told you more about her past she was either making a joke out of it, or being apathetic. They tended to be sarcastic towards each other and ended up bickering sometimes.

Usually the three of you just sat around talking, and drinking. Kinda just dozing off into each others worlds rather than thinking about the shit show around you all. You never really worried about being judged, other than seeming boring or weak. They liked you. And it was kinda refreshing. Yknow? People in your world. They tended to be cruel, incompetent, horrible people. But they still had their heart. No matter how much Yelena tried to shove it down.

You always wondered what it would be like, if the three of you weren't fugitives. If the three of you could live normal lives and be yourselves.

They never really talk about their feelings, which you couldn't blame them. Nat never really talked about her past. Only her two families. You kinda just sat there happy to be with them. They were fun, and nice. And you felt appreciated and accepted. And you were.

[milkacchan]

Request for anon: Hi! Could you write hcs for poly bakusquad with a quirkless reader who has a serious independent streak but has recently been a target for villain attacks and got injured, but refuses to rely on anyone and tries to ignore their pain and take care of everyone else, please?

This is gonna be a little angsty

• First- it annoyed bakugou that you, someone /quirkless/ made it into the hero class

• On pure fucking spite and anger alone

• You didn't even particularly want to get in to UA

• It was just something you chose to prove someone wrong about

• and it fucking aggravated him- more than aggravated him

• Inspired Deku though, he hated that even more

• and he isn't surebhow- but he ended up talking to you and suddenly you're part of his friend group and he's /okay/ with that

• that irks him too.

• and a lot of things are uncovered when y'all are friendly w eachother

• and they learn pretty fucking fast about your independent streak

• and when you all started dating (crazy how they managed that) they thought it might go away- only it didn't.

• You never asked for help, regardless of what it was- you'd handle it on your own.

• You got hurt during training? Don't worry about it, I'm fine.

• Failed a test? You'd disappear for a few days to study and retake it.

• Didn't know what you were doing in a particular subject? You'd teach it to yourself.

• Aizawa had heard the words 'help' ONCE and he was limited to the help you'd allow him to give you .

• You trained your ass off everyday, you worked hard in school, you took no shit- it was obvious you felt like you had something to prove.

• Bakugou felt like he was a partial reason for that and it made him feel like shit.

• He wasn't exactly the kindest to you when classes started in first year.

• But he was concerned.

• They were all concerned.

• recently, you'd been stressed out. They could tell, even if you weren't giving them signs.

• On top of that, you'd become a big target for villains and no one knew why.

• it seemed like both you and midoryia were a magnet for assholes in masks

• And they tried talking to you about it, they do.

• Denki brings it up, he's holding your hand, Kirishima is threading his fingers through your hair and Seros behind you, holding your waist. Mina is in between your legs, resting her head on your chest and bakugou is at the end of the bed.

• And Denki asks if you need help- whether its coping with it- or dealing with it while its happening- or trying to figure out /why/ they're attacking you

• and you blow him off "it doesn't matter, i'll deal with it if it happens again."

"It's not a matter of if, it's a matter of when." Bakugou glares.

"Okay, then when it happens again, I'll deal with it."

"That's fucking stupid," he growls.

Kami squeezes your hand gently. "Maybe we should have a plan-" he glares at Bakugou.

"I was fine last time. Don't do this."

"Do what? Offer fucking help?" Bakugou snaps and Mina cringes. She grips your shirt. She knows what's going to happen, she knows you're going to stomp off to think- it could be a few hours or it could be days. Sometimes, if she held something on you, you'd stay. She hoped this was the case.

"Your fucking pity." You seeth. "I don't need it. I can take care of myself."

"Baby we didn't-" kiri starts but you're already sliding off the bed.

"Babe," Sero looks at you. "please come talk about it,"

You say nothing, and let the door close behind you.

"Fuck." Mina sighs

• Its 2 days.

• 2 days before you resurface, calm and collected, like nothing happened.

• but you're busy- you're training harder. Much harder, you're pushing yourself past your limits and its obvious

• they were already impressed. Theg already knew you could take care of yourself. Why couldn't you see that?

• you push and push and push

• and they don't see as much of you

• when they do see you at the end of the night, you always look exhausted

• and you put on the same fucking front each time

• you smile and laugh and kiss them goodnight but they can see you're in pain

• they don't even get a chance to talk about it with you

• because the next thing they know

• theyre in another attack and youre in the center of it

• You're fighting and you're holding him off but you aren't going to last much longer

• You were tired from the day before- you hadn't gotten proper sleep- and he was strong

• It's all kind of a blur, really, you're thrown a lot, youre bleeding

• he had you by the neck at the end, you were clawing at his hands and he was laughing

• your mates weren't exactly in the best shape either- after all, the attack had happened in the middle of the night

• A strong kick to the center of his nose seemed to do the trick. There was a sickening crack and his hand loosened and he fell back.

• When you regained youre senses you froze- he wasn't breathing.

• you /killed/ him.

• Your stomach churned and suddenly all the pain you felt increased ten fold.

• You scrambled to stand up, Mina was the first one you saw and you fell to your knees in front of her, cupping her cheeks. "Baby? Baby you okay?"

"M fine, but you're not, that's a lot of blood." She looked up at you her eyes wide. "Baby that's a lot-"

"I'm okay, I promise."

• She wanted to yell and scream and you, she wanted to hit you and telling to just accept help but you'd already stood up, moving to look around for the others.

• Denki was next, you met him with a hug and a short but desperate kiss. "You okay?" You whisper, brushing your thumb over his bruised cheek. Mina was behind you now, gently brushing her fingers through the blondes hair, but she stepped away when she saw Kiri and Bakugou.

"I'm okay, I'm okay," he smiked softly.

"Eiji? Katsu?" You mumbled.

"They're okay, they're fine. You don't look so good though."

"M- M okay.." you mutter. Youre tired now. Standing here is nice. You're dizzy- Ashido was right. That was a lot of blood.

Your eyes close and your weight falls.

"Hey- Hey- Jesus! Guys! Katsuki! I don't- I can't tell if she's breathing-"

• You wake up in the hospital 2 days later.

• Mina's in the bed with you, hand thrown gently over your thighs. Sero and Denki are on the left side, heads down, eye's closed and arms over your shin.

• Kiris got your left hand in his, another hand in Minas hip.

• Bakugous on the right side, arms crossed and head down.

• and youre confused because why the fuck are you here?

• what happened?

• you miss Katsukis voice next to you when it all comes back

• and you can't help but scramble to sit up and suddenly you can't breathe

• youre not sure how long you zoned out, but when you finally get back, there's two nurses

• ones replacing and IV bag

• and the other is checking your tempature, you think.

• theres another needle stick in your arm but you can't pay mind to it right now.

• the warmth around you was gone and you desperately wanted it back.

• they weren't in the room anymore

• and when the nurses cleared the room, the tears spilled over.

• your brought your hands to cover your face and your head fell back.

• five minutes? 10 minures? Later there was a gentle tap on your shoulder

• it was ashido

• your arms were around in her seconds

• "You okay?" She whispered as the others took their spots around the bed.

"No," you shook your head. "I killed him- and and I could've gotten you guys hurt because I didn't listen," your breathing had started to get faster again.

"Hey, it's okay. Just breathe," she soothes, thumbs stroking your cheeks.

"I can't- I- fuck /help me/-" you gasp out

• It takes awhile, but they managed to calm you down.

• Ashido just holds you, she lets you cry, and Kiri reminds you that you're okay

• they do most of the comforting usually

• when you're breath has finally started to even out, and you can feel the pain again, you know you'll be asleep soon from the pain meds.

"How bad was it?" You whisper, hands still gripling Minas shirt.

"Bad." Katsuki spoke. "You stopped breathing when we got you here."

Sero rubbed his face. "You needed a blood transfusion. They weren't entirely sure how it was going to end."

"You were...you were just standing in my arms and then you weren't moving. And then you weren't answering-" denki breathed. "There was blood everywhere."

"What about you guys?"

"Can you just stop?" Katsuki groaned. "Can you just let us worry about /you/? Let us help. Don't ask about us. You almost /died/ and your only fucking thought is us. Why?" He was crying, head down, hands gripping his pants.

"He's got a point. It's okay to ask for help," kirishima whispers. "So why don't you?"

• you're quiet for a few moments.

• do you go into detail.

• or do you dodge the question.

• ultimately, the fear of losing them outweighed any shame you would have felt

• "its hard not having a quirk." You mumble, eyes down. "Quirks are practically currency. And power is highly valued. I don't have that. I don't have any of that. I'm in a constant risk of being replaced and if I ask for help, they know I'm weak. I can't ask for help."

• And they all feel their hearts shatter a little bit.

• Bakugou had poked fun at you for quite some time in first year for not having a quirk.

• and Denki wasn't much better- neither was Sero. They'd make jokes about how fast you'd drop out.

• Bakugou would break a little bit, reminding you that you weren't weak. You still being alive was proof of that.

• and slowly

• slowly you get accustomed to ask for help.

• its not necessarily with words- sometimes they ask and you just nod

• or you ask in your own way.

• youre independent streak remains- but its not as bad.

[thisdreamplace]

ashamed to say the 3D reflects our true inner reality, yes? my ENTIRE family has turned against me, after some atrocious conflicts in which they all ganged up on me nd judged me, name-calling, very hurtful things too, provoked me. i been dealing with some serious mental uh 'issues' on my own nd when this happend i was already on the verge of a breakdown nd the good news is while the conflict happened i kept telling myself theyre only reflecting me u can get thru it etc. Later i looked at the hard facts nd realised some of the hurtful things they said were my deep secret feelings abt myself. BUT my question is why the HELL cant they talk to me like normal people? confronting one person vs whole family, why?! i felt so small nd like an object, nd not a single person defended me. am i not a part of the family?

Part 2 is simply its been a week and theyve still been cold towards me as if I yelled AT THEM ABT THEIR PAINFUL 'tRuThS' in front of EVERYONE LMAOOO. At first if i was around we'd have dinner together while they'd all talk to each other like best friends aka sickeningly overly friendly while completely IGNORING me while i sat there. i could tolerate it. I WAS PISSED AT THEM TOO Now its too painful. They're having dinner without telling me, yesterday didnt leave enough food for me knowing i hadnt eaten, serve tea/snacks without my portion. i honestly feel so unspeakably trigered nd sad. worst is these things r reminding me of deep school memories when id feel excluded like this by other kids at parties or class activities nd its like im back there. anyway im glad i controled myself a bit nd didnt counter with horrid things abt them to THEM yet they think they can say the same to me. im so hurt rn i cant even tell u lol i was okay the whole week but now its too much,, ive been crying the whole day

thing is, ik this seems like 'im a victim oh noooo they ganged up on meee'. Nope its more like how do i change myself to change them?! u could say why not talk to them how they made u feel, except whenever ive defended myself in the past regarding hurtful things they/anyone in family did, the siblings/parents would say irritating things like: "oh so YOU'RE the one hurt? Oh thats right, its because YOU'RE right! yes, yes, you're always right. Forgive me for saying anything against the perfect person u are." Or one of them says: "You?! I hurt YOU? What about me? You don't care about me! So you think what ur doing is okay?" or "no, who do YOU think u are to tell ME what to do?" it just goes in circles like this! i dont deserve to hurt myself or do smth to myself even if they dont give a damn, even if years of silent suffering of the 'mEntAL pRoBlEms' (which my lovely parents have already told me is my fault years ago, hence why I NEVER show it to them, unless im crying too much then lol they just mock me, but idc abt THAT bcoz now ik i hav a right to let out my emotions)). i mean this is worse rjan usual. its kinda insane nd when guests come they start talking to me as if nothing's wrong then when they leave, they ignore me!

this whole twisted dynamics, feelijf left out nd helpless is ig some crazy assumptin from childhood of being alone nd unable to defend myself. plus when they argye with anyone, they become overly self-righteous nd over the years its clear they can only scream, blame the scapegoat and never talk abt serious matter like normal ppl. And yes, in the past when i bring this up, they like to reply with stuff like: "no YOU'RE the one who doesnt talk to US bla bla" like, when i do u just shut me down? have belittled my mental 'issues', mocked me when im at my worst, stabbed me with cruel silent treatments nd thinking its alright "bcoz of self-righteousness blegh". Or maybe i think its okay for them to punish me? or whatev? Like law says u get what u r. if these ~~~ keep doing this to me, im doubly ashamed to say this means im the one at fault?! i let this monster assunptin grow nd now idk what to do. the worst thing imo is how i failed to tell them,even if they ignored me in the past, how i feel when anything like this or a conflict happens nd none of them stand up for me, or at least are neutral to me. bcoz now if i do, they say nope, u dont care what we do, YOUR the shameless one :! so yeah they hav the advantage of 'numbwrs' while im too afraid to stand up for myself lol. btw they never apologize nd i suspect they expect ME to apologize to TYEM bcoz everything's already ruined bcoz of 'me'..... i give up on them, i really do, but my heart hurts. Either i harden my heart, nd save up to move out, OR i try to change my self or whatev assumptins i have. But how do i do that? i try afirming: "my familys so nice to me, im respected by them" but it feels so fake tears literally enter my eyes lol

firstly i want to say, thank you for coming here to vent and being open about your feelings. it’s so important sometimes to just let it all out, without holding back. so that way you can move forward more bravely, to create the life you truly want to experience. that being said, i am going to be completely honest with you here in hopes that perhaps it may inspire you and you will be ready to do what is needed for the life you truly want to experience.

“BUT my question is why the HELL cant they talk to me like normal people?” -> “i felt so small nd like an object, nd not a single person defended me. am i not a part of the family?” here is your question, and here is your answer. i think that being completely honest when venting your feelings can actually be so helpful, because if you read back what you have said, you will be able to clearly find the patterns that are creating your personal hell. FEELING IS THE SECRET. ASSUMPTIONS HARDEN INTO FACT. the true way you feel, becomes your experience. Feelings/assumptions/beliefs come first, and the experiences come second to confirm them. That’s all that’s happening here.

i am glad that you were able to keep your reactions to a minimum! that's wonderful and as many of us know, it can sometimes be hard to do in such hurtful circumstances. but you managed to do it, this shows just a small glimpse of the power you truly hold within. although emotionally you may feel out of control, there is still the choice to choose better for yourself which you demonstrated through your reaction to them. good for you!

the truth is, you acknowledge the victim mindset to seem like you’re not engulfed in it, but no, you’re still very clearly engulfed in it. as i have said before, you can’t be a VICTOR and feel bad about it. feeling bad about taking responsibility, about everyone is you pushed out, about any of these types of concepts automatically shows a victim mindset. talking to them won’t do anything, because there are no second causes. you could talk to them nicely, you could be the nicest person in the world. but you can’t pretend your way out of your inner world. your inner world is the one and only cause of your experiences. until you change the story you tell yourself, they will stay the same. this is a hard pill to swallow sometimes. and it can feel heavily, because it’s ultimately only you’re choice. they can’t change until you do. the heaviness of the situation may make it seem impossible to turn around, but that’s just an illusion. your emotional attachment to the situation makes it seem so real and hard to change, but no. that’s just an illusion too. however, it’s ultimately your choice. Do you want to take responsibility for your life, or do you want to keep being tossed around like your lost at sea, victim to the merciless angry waves? Because we always have a choice. No one chooses your inner world, you do. No one can go into your mind and decide things for you, that’s only your job.

you can harden your heart, but who would be the one who suffers more? It won’t be your family, i can assure you. it’ll only be you. by doing that, you keep that old story alive and therefore you keep experiencing it. you keep those stories alive that are desperately showing themselves to you, saying “LET US GO.” but you remain identified with those painful stories, so you grip onto them tight. you keep on thinking of possible reasons for their behavior, but you could just read your entire ask back to yourself and you’ll see every reason. your reactions, your beliefs about them, your emotional pain. its your refusal to let those things go, and focus on what you truly want that keeps you in this state and keeps them in this state. sure it’s painful to face the responsibility at first, but it’s not a blame game. thinking its about blame is just a misunderstanding of the teachings. it’s not about they’re so perfect and you’re so not, so you have to change your ways. it’s about this is how life works here. this is about... you can ONLY ever experience self. whatever is going on within, will be reflected in your outer world. it’s about how they can’t change, UNTIL YOU DO. so instead of feeling sorry for yourself, you have to decide to give yourself the gift of a wonderful life because you have that power too. you stop deciding they can be in control of your experience, and you decide your experience yourself.

to change your assumptions, stop trying to affirm over them and actually face what’s keeping you from believing in your desires. yeah, it’s going to be painful and uncomfortable. but you need to face the pain that you’re running away from, so that it can finally be released. you have to realize, it only stayed true because you believed it to be true. and if you are to live a life free from that story, and experience a more desirable story, then you must let the pain go. give yourself love and grace as you work through it, and know that there is a more beautiful side of life that awaits for you to accept it in.

No One To Change But Self

There is Nothing to Forgive

How to Sit with Your Triggers

give yourself the time you need, it's not race. the love that you wish to experience exists, allow it in. 💖