#its been a year since the sleeper agent in me got activated and i became onsessed with ponies again in nearly a decade

[dearimasu]

THE TUMBLR YEAR IN REVIEW IS COMING. A YEAR HAS PASSED. OH MY GOD. OH MY GKD. OH MGOD.

[crashdevlin]

Crashing 1- Drowning

Crashing Masterlist

Author’s Note: Originally posted to ao3 (This is an edited and improved version) Part Four of the Red Queen Chronicles!

Summary: When Loki pulls Cassandra Campbell out of cryo and uses her trigger words against her, the memories that have been hiding from her since she was ten years old finally crash down on her completely.

Word Count: 3686

Pairing(s): Clint Barton x OFC, past Loki x OFC, past Bucky Barnes x OFC, past Steve Rogers x OFC

Chapter Warnings: mentions of brainwashing, mentions of murder, violence and anger, mentions of cheating

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“She is beautiful, isn’t she?” Loki asked, setting his hand against the glass of the tank. The terrified Wakandan scientist nodded nervously. “Gives off an air of regality, even asleep.” He scoffed. “Especially asleep. There’s no fear on her here. No contempt. No attempt to run from her king,” he mused before turning to the scientist. “You can speak German, yes?”

“Y-yes.”

Loki produced a red notebook from his breast pocket and handed it backward to the man without looking away from the frozen woman. “Halfway through. Labeled ‘Kind’. Open this and recite those words.”

The man hit several buttons on the console attached to the tank and it filled with a chemical. Cassie blinked her eyes open, green orbs filling with confusion. The blur of confusion cleared out of her eyes and it was replaced with fear. “Loki?” she squeaked, struggling against the binds as the tank opened.

“Junior. Vierhundert.”

“No! Don’t read that!” Cassie struggled harder, but she didn’t move. “Please!”

“Keep going,” Loki ordered, smiling at her as she fought against the binds.

“I’m sorry,” the man said. “Rot. Tochter. Vermächtnis. Fünfzig. Messer. Schädel."

“No! God, please, no! Please! Please, stop!” she begged over the trigger words.

“Johann. Zwei,” the scientist said, shaking as the woman blinked slowly...as if everything were suddenly clear.

“Undo her restraints,” Loki demanded, and the man rushed to release her. Cassie stepped down from the tank and looked around like she had new eyes. “How do you feel, Joanna? What’s different?”

“Shut up, Loki,” she bit out quietly before turning to the Wakandan man. “Run. Now. Go.”

The Asgardian watched in amusement as the man ran from the lab. “Now. How do you feel, my queen?”

“Not as different as you would want,” she snapped, leaning against the tank and looking up at Loki with disdain. “You really thought I’d come out on the other side of this ready to be your bride or something?”

“I wasn’t sure how you’d come out of it, Joanna. I was actually hoping you’d be ready to take directions as the other one does.”

Cassie scoffed and shook her head, scornfully. “Someone’s feeling a little flaccid without his scepter.”

Loki’s eyes went wide. “How dare you talk to-” he started, indignantly.

“Don’t start, Loki. Let’s just go. We don’t wanna be here when the king and the Doras get here,” she said, grabbing his coat and pulling him out the door.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

T’Challa sent word to Steve as he was mounting his offensive on the Raft that Cassie was kidnapped out of the cryo lab by Loki, so when they were safely away from the prison and sitting in the cargo hold of a ship on its way to America, Steve sat next to Clint. “You know, Cassie was the one who gave me the information I needed to get you out.”

Clint nodded. “Yeah? When did she talk-”

“She didn’t go home after she got out. She found me and Bucky and she helped us get to Wakanda. She was instrumental.”

“Wait, but she was--what about the…” Steve looked down and Clint’s whole body slumped. “No. What happened?”

Steve shook his head. “She said she lost it, but...she also said she had some interaction with Loki after she left the Raft so...he may have...I’m not sure.”

“She must be devastated,” Clint whispered.

“Um...there’s...more.” Steve pulled the letter out of his inside pocket, but he didn’t hand it to the archer.

“Wh-”

“And before you read this, you need to know...Loki found her in Wakanda.”

Clint’s eyes went wide. “What?! What do you mean? Why did she stay in Wakanda?”

“She had them freeze her. She said that the letter would explain.” Steve set the envelope on Clint’s lap and stood.

Clint’s stomach was in knots as he slid his finger across the envelope and pulled out the letter. A weight in the envelope had him shaking out a white gold ring that he recognized. He cleared his throat to deal with the sudden dryness.

My Dearest Clint,

I’m so sorry that I cannot do this in person, but you’re in prison and I’ll be frozen by the time Steve gets you out. Loki is looking for the red book, the one that Zemo used to activate Bucky as the Winter Soldier. I’m 90% certain that my words are on those pages too. What I’m not sure of is who I will become when those words are said. Since it means I’ll be who Hydra wanted, I can’t imagine anyone would enjoy finding out. That’s why I’m going into cryo, because I can’t hurt anyone if I’m frozen. I decided it was the best course of action...and I know you’re thinking that I would never hurt anyone, but you have never been more wrong. I’ve been remembering things and I know that I have killed. I killed two SHIELD agents when I was a child and I killed a man just a few days ago. Who knows what else is hiding in my head?

I’m sorry to send the ring back like this, but it’s what you deserve. I never should have said ‘yes’. It was selfish of me. I wanted my happy ending so much that I lied...to myself and to you. But I’ve been pretending for so long and I can’t anymore. I can’t keep putting up this facade for you. I kissed Sgt. Barnes. He saw the real me, those parts that I’ve been hiding from you and something about that drove me to break your trust. You deserve better. You deserve the woman you thought I was.

Despite it all, I love you. Be well.

Cassandra Campbell (R.Q)

Clint crushed the letter in his hand, anger almost palpable in the small space. “Let me get this straight,” he snapped as he stood, stomping up to Steve as the others stared on in confusion. “While I was in prison for helping you, your buddy made out with my fiancée and then one of you convinced her to freeze herself, leaving her completely defenseless when Loki showed up to get her in the supposedly impenetrable fortress that is Wakanda?”

Steve looked up at the ceiling. “It was Bucky’s idea to go into cryo...and he isn’t the only one that she kissed,” he finished quietly.

Clint’s fist smashed into Steve’s left cheekbone, groaning as he pulled away cradling his hand. “Worth it!”

“You kissed her back?” Sam asked, as Scott tried to not look impressed and Wanda made no effort to hide her judgment of Cap.

“I…” Steve rubbed the back of his neck and cleared his throat. “She...I didn’t know she kissed Bucky first and...she did say she was breaking up with you, Clint, and...I didn’t know if I was ever going to see her again. I’m sorry, Clint.”

“I know what you are thinking and she is not,” Wanda practically growled at Scott. “I could feel your judgment. You don’t know her like I do, like we do. She isn’t promiscuous.”

“Oh, really? ‘Cause, I mean...evidence to the contrary, Wanda. How many other guys does a woman have to kiss before she gets labeled a slut?”

“Shut the fuck up, Lang,” Clint growled.

Scott rolled his eyes. “Yeah, okay. Get angry with me.”

“So what are we gonna do about Loki taking her?” Sam asked.

“We’re going to go to the U.S. and we’ll go from there. Coulson gave me the location of an old SHIELD black site where we can hang our hats. We’ll search for them from there,” Steve responded.

“Screw that,” Clint snapped. “I’m going home. You can find me on the farm.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Clint stood in the barn, launching arrows into a target made of hay. He was furious. He was dismayed. He was taking it out on the wall behind his target.

“What’d that wall ever do to you?”

Clint turned to the voice, immediately dropping the bow and bounding for the small blonde woman. “How’d you get away from Loki?!” he asked, wrapping his arms around her and holding her tight.

“I fought back,” she answered. “Did you expect anything less of me?”

He pulled back, eyeing her warily as a feeling of unease settled in his chest. “You...you wrote me a letter. You said Loki was looking for your trigger words. It’s the whole reason you let yourself be frozen. You didn’t want him to let out the sleeper-”

“You think Loki’s controlling me?” she asked, incredulously. She scoffed. “He’s just an alien without his fancy scepter. I’m a super soldier.”

Clint drove his fist into her jaw and stepped back into a fighting stance. “You might be, but Cassie hates being called that. You’re Joanna again,” he accused.

She smirked as she straightened, her tongue darting out to lick at her busted lip. “Actually, Clint, I prefer ‘Cassie’. Joanna Schmidt is an obvious Nick Fury construct. It evokes uncomfortable feelings and images of the noseless abomination my father became.” She wiped at the blood leaking from her lip. “Cassie, though, that gives off a feeling of hope and love. It evokes images of a young woman crying over a holiday dinner because she finally has a family to share Christmas dinner with.”

She sighed and shook her head. “I was afraid you were going to be a problem. That you were going to see the change, recognize.” She hummed sadly. “Sad. I was praying to fool you.”

“You could never fool me,” Clint spat out.

“Because you love me,” she finished for him. “You, the man who watched through a scope as I tried to piece together some semblance of a normal life. But I couldn’t, could I?” She chuckled ruefully. “Not with Phil’s help. Not even with your help. It’s like I was trying to put together a puzzle with half the pieces gone. Joanna...she was a completely different puzzle, but she was missing the same number of pieces.”

“And you, what, you’re the missing jigsaw pieces?” Clint asked as his hand went to the tactical blade clipped to his belt.

Cassie lurched forward, grabbing the knife from his hand and punching him in the mouth with the handle. “The words are the pieces, you idiot. I’m the big picture, Clint. Pay attention,” she snapped. “I’m the image we’ve been trying to get to but haven’t been able to because we didn’t have the words to trigger the memories. The memories that Hydra and SHIELD decided I’d be better off without!” She kicked Clint in the chest, sending him backward into the barn door. She let out a satisfied sigh as the sound of cracked bones hit her ears.

“Because what good could come from me knowing that I killed my first enemy agents at nine years old?” she asked, with a bitter laugh. “Fury said he was afraid I’d look in the mirror and hate myself but he was terrified that I’d like it...and you know what, Hawk? I don’t.” Her smile faltered for a moment as a nauseated look took her face. “I don’t like it...but it feels right to be me. The ‘me’ I was bred to be.”

Clint coughed painfully and moved to sit up against the barn door. “This isn’t you. This is Loki.”

“Loki has nothing to do with this! I sent him packing a week ago! He wanted nothing to do with Hydra and since I am the future of Hydra, I sent his ass back to Asgard.” She squatted down in front of him, a sincere sadness gracing her pale features. “I knew this was going to be difficult for you to understand, Clint. Even before Loki made me...complete, I knew you’d hate this. I knew you’d hate me if I became this.”

Clint glared at her. “We won’t let you-”

“I know,” she interrupted softly. She nodded as she stood. “All of you would fight tooth and nail to get me back to being the person you think I should be. You’d send me off to SHIELD to be erased again. So, I guess I’ll just have to kill you all.”

Clint’s lip twitched into a sneer. “Harder villains have tried.”

“You’re right, they have...and we’ve overcome them all, but...see, Zemo had the right idea and he did half of the work for me.” She ran her hand through her hair and licked her lips. “The Avengers are strong because we work well to balance each other’s faults. The powered and the nonpowered, tacticians and geniuses and just plain strong heroes...but right now, we’re fractured. Those of that signed can come and go as we please and the rest of you, fugitives, you’re scattered. I heard Scott is even on house arrest. Are the rest of you even in contact with each other?” She shook her head. “I’ll have marched through the hidden Avengers before you all realize the rest of your team is gone...and then I’ll take the Compound.”

“You’ll never make it through all of us,” he groaned. “Even separately.”

“See, you forget, Clint, that I’ve known you all for quite a while now, so...I know your pressure points. I know your buttons, Clint. Like I know that just mentioning Bucky makes Steve stop in his tracks.” She smiled cruelly as Clint swallowed heavily. “I wish I could have been there to see his face when the Winter Soldier showed up at Fury’s old black site.”

“You didn’t,” Clint whispered.

She chuckled. “Of course I did. Why would I leave such a powerful Hydra asset on ice?”

“Why would you send him after Steve?”

“Why wouldn’t I? He’s Steve’s weak spot. I would be a fool to not use him. Especially since I know Soldat’s trigger phases. It’s the only Russian I know. Strucker taught me a long time ago. Did you know that Winter Soldier was supposed to be my right hand man when I came of age? When they put me at the head of Hydra, Bucky was going to be standing next to me.” Cassie examined the knife in her hand and smiled sadly. “I remember that now. I’m finally the person I was created to be, Hawk. I know you can’t be happy for me about that and...if it’s any consolation, killing you is really gonna hurt my feelings.”

A shock went through her as something hit her back but it didn’t put Cassie down. She turned to the redheaded intruder with rage in her eyes, then forced a tight smile. “Natasha! How unexpected. I didn’t think you’d be here. Did you know she was coming, babe?” she asked, stomping her booted heel down onto Clint’s hand.

“Steve sent me,” Natasha said, hand resting on the stingers on her wrist.

“Really?” Cassie growled.

“Bucky showed up at Steve’s new base and tried to kill him. Luckily, Sam was there. They were able to subdue him. When he came back to himself, he told them you sent him. He was adamant it wasn’t your fault though, so Steve called in to get you some help.”

“And you’re just here to stall until the help gets here, right?” Cassie rolled her tongue along the inside of her cheek and scoffed. “Let me guess...my help comes in the form of Phil’s Zephyr 1, which will take me to Fury to be erased again.” She shook her head as she twisted her heel until she heard the crunch of Clint’s bones. Her lips twitched, attempting a smile as Clint screamed. “Someone’s not drawing a bowstring anytime soon. Something to remember me by, Hawk, since I won’t be able to.”

“It’s better this way,” Natasha said, matter-of-factly.

Cassie took her foot off of the archer’s hand and squared herself off with the Russian. “Says you. You’re not the one who has to walk around with a giant hole in your personality. You aren’t the one who gets to feel wrong every day and not know why.”

Clint cradled his broken left hand in his right and stood with a wince. “You don’t even like yourself like this!” he argued.

“I hit a wall, Clint,” she growled through clenched teeth. “I couldn’t deal with fighting myself anymore. Since Sokovia I’ve been trying to convince myself that this isn’t who I am, that remembering wouldn’t change me, but it did. I changed...and when I woke up, when Loki said those words, everything clicked. Who I really am flooded into me...so I let myself finally drown.”

“What, you’re tired so you just stop fighting? What happened to the strong woman I wanted to marry?” Clint snapped.

“She died in Africa,” Cassie snapped, looking from Natasha to Clint to the barn door to the hayloft. “About the time she killed a warlord and threatened to drown a little boy in the blood of his friends.” She bent her knees and vaulted herself over Natasha, landing on the ladder before jumping to the loft. “I can’t let you take me back, sorry.” She started toward the hayloft door but stopped in her tracks when an arrow hit her right thigh.

“Barney! What the fuck? You shot my-” Clint yelled as Cassie pulled the arrow from the soft flesh of her leg.

She turned and flung the arrow at the tall ginger man, who grabbed the arrow from the air. “What? You can’t shoot her so I did.”

“Barney Barton! Nice to finally meet you!” she said with sarcastic enthusiasm. “Unfortunately, I can’t stick around. You understand, I’m sure,” she said before jumping out the loft door.

Barney handed the arrow shaft to Clint’s good hand. “Great taste in women, bro.”

“That wasn’t Cassie,” Clint defended as Barney walked out the door. He threw the tracer-arrow shaft to the ground and followed.

“Yes, it was,” Natasha said, pulling up a map on her tablet and watching the retreating dot.

“How can you say that, Nat? You know Cass. You know she’s not-”

“Clint, I know what you wanna hear, but I can’t say it.” Natasha shrugged. “She was one person with those memories gone, but she is someone different when she has them.”

“Yeah, okay, but...you remember your-”

“And I fought to become someone better than what they made me in the Red Room,” she interrupted, following the Bartons across the field to the farmhouse. “Cassie doesn’t wanna fight so unless we can get her to Coulson to get those memories erased, your fiancee is gone.”

“Do you even want her back, Clint? Bitch just broke your hand.” Barney threw the bow on the porch swing as he walked through the door. “I mean, even if you got her back to being...what’s her name? ‘Red Queen’. Even if you get rid of the homicidal tendencies the Nazis gave her, she tried to kill you. It’s gonna change how you see her, how all of you treat her.”

“And we won’t be able to tell her why,” Natasha added.

“What does that matter? How many times have you tried to kill me, Barn? Nat was trying to kill me when we met!” Clint exploded.

“Different,” Barney said, pulling a beer out of the fridge with one hand and grabbing an ice pack from the freezer with the other. “This is the chick you said hadn’t ever killed anyone, right? That actively avoided doing more than incapacitating the bad guys, ‘cause her dad was a huge dick?”

Natasha rolled her eyes. “Now we all know that’s not true, don’t we?”

“You don’t seem too surprised by that, Natasha,” Clint said suspiciously as he put the ice pack over the back of his hand.

“I read the file. The Projekt Kind file. I knew she killed the agents in ‘99 before she did,” Natasha said, sighing as the signal on the tracer dulled. “She’s blocking the transmitter.”

“She’s a scientist,” Clint growled. “I coulda told you a tracker wasn’t going to work.”

“Shut up, man. I had to try something.” Barney popped open his beer and took a drink. “At least you know which direction was heading and she’ll have to pull whatever’s dampening it eventually to cut out the chip.”

“If we even want to find her,” Natasha reiterated.

“Of course we do! What kind of-”

“Exactly what memories do we take, Clint?” Nat asked, calmly. “Just her childhood or do we take her memories of the things that made her start remembering? Do we take away Loki’s second attack? Do we take Austria? What about Wanda? Where do we stop?”

“Wherever we need to to get her back!” Clint’s hand reflexively started to clench, causing him to hiss in pain.

“But if we take everything, she’ll barely know you. She’ll still be terrified of Steve. She will be drowning in a bottle of whiskey and pining for Phil, who kinda still loves her and is currently very unattached.”

“Coulson wouldn’t.”

Natasha shrugged. “Man’s lonely. His last girlfriend was shot and bled out in his arms. He might.”

“And she’d have no memory of playing Avenger with you,” Barney said from behind his beer can.

“Why don’t you just turn the new Cassie?” Laura suggested as she entered the kitchen and all eyes fell on her. “I’m sorry. I know I’m not supposed to listen in, but Cassie’s a friend.”

“It’s not that simple, Lore. She’s gone over to Hydra. It’s not like we can just convince her to come be an Avenger again.”

“Also, Avengers are less a thing now,” Natasha finished.

“She loves you, Clint. You know she does.”

“She woulda been really sad about killing you, right?” Barney set the can on the counter and turned to his wife. “She may not be fixable.”

“But...you just bring her in, help her,” Laura argued. “She doesn’t have to be bad just because she was made to do some things when she was Hydra...right?”

Clint looked between Barney and Natasha. He sighed loudly as he heard the sound of a Quinjet landing in the yard.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Kitchen Sink - @emoryhemsworth​​​ @flamencodiva​​​ @wasabiwitteks​​​ @rainbowkisses31​​​ @rissbennett @mariekoukie6661​​​ @officiallyunofficialperson​​​ @dolphincliffs​​​ @mrs-meghan-winchester​​​ @gayspacenerd​​​ @foxyjwls007​​​ @ilovefanfic86​​​ @marvelfansworld​​​ @f-yeahfandoms​​​ @wonderlandfandomkingdom​​​ @hhiggs​​​ @sev3nruby​​​  @hobby27​​​ @paintballkid711​​​ @divadinag​​​ @thewhiterabbit42​​​ @fantasymyth-1 @queenoftheunderdark​​​ @cosicas-cuquis​​​ @superfanficnatural​​​ @letsby​​​ @supernatural-bellawinchester​​​ @onethirstyunicorn​​​ @swinchester27​​​ @chalicia​​​ @sunnyroadtrips​​​ @screechingartisancashbailiff​​​ @death-unbecomes-you​​​ @dayasvalkyrie​​​ Hero Tags - @atc74​​​ @winchesterxfamilybusiness​​​ @holylulusworld​​​

[thesportssoundoff]

Playoff Droughts And Who Can Break Theirs

Joey

Baseball season is approaching and in the interest of breaking up the monotony of what figures to be a LONG and painful spring training, I wanted to take a peek whimsically while looking backwards. There's no more enjoyable story than when a team that's been excluded from the postseason dance for quite some time gets their invite. Sometimes it's years of hard work and team building and other years its due to ownership just throwing money around and sometimes? It's just a fluke luck circumstance not to be repeated for quite some time. For the sake of doing something of a bit of a project, I decided to take a brief look at teams that have not made the playoffs in over five years. I chose five years arbitrarily I suppose because to me five years or more without a playoff run is a genuine drought whereas four or less just feels like a lull regardless of expectations. Yankees fans may consider three years without the playoffs to be a drought whereas that's if anything a lull or a break in tradition. Teams that have been out of it for five years or more are teams that are either mired in long term BAD baseball or embracing mediocrity at best and so five years just felt right. Also I wanted to do it since the invent of the two game wild card but then it would be literally just three teams and nobody wants that.

Of the eight teams who have missed the playoffs for five years straight or longer, who are most likely to break that streak and join the dance? Well...

1- Philadelphia Phillies Last Playoff Appearance: 2011

Last year's darling picks, the Phillies have been out of the playoffs since 2011. For fun facts, 2011 was also the first year of the Chromebook, snapchat and the release of Elder Scrolls: Skryim. If you read this space for MMA? 2011 was the year Jon Jones beat Shogun for the LHW title, the Strikeforce HW Grand Prix started and Alistair Overeem's UFC debut. It's been a while and to the credit of Philadelphia, they've tried a multitude of ways from riding out the final years of aging veterans to rehauling their farm system to spending and spending big. It's not for a lack of trying they haven't made it back to the playoffs! Last year they seemed armed to roll through a perceived weak NL East with big names and big money across the board. Of course little did we know the Nationals would be better without Bryce Harper and the Phillies wouldn't even crack the top two of the division. Out goes Gabe Kapler and in comes Joe Girardi who will be tasked with VETERAN MANAGING his way through this ultra talented and underachieving roster that has added the likes of Zach Wheeler, Didi Gregorious as well as Andrew McCutchen who was lost early into 2019 with a torn ACL. The Phillies boast an insane line up as if Didi and Cutch are healthy and productive then you've got a core of Jean Segura, JT Realmuto, Didi, McCutchen, Rhys Hoskins and Bryce Harper. The rotation is pretty damn spiffy (health permitting) with Wheeler, Aaron Nola, Zach Eflin and Jake Arrieta plus flostam as a fifth if need be. The Phillies are always going to be a team that has slumps magnified and streaks glorified (such is life with Bryce Harper) but I can't see them not cracking the playoffs in some form or fashion this year. If they don't make the playoffs, we may need to try and discuss if there's some kind of a curse out there on the Phanatic.

2- Cincinnati Reds Last Playoff Appearance: 2013

Gotta admit I had no idea the Reds had a playoff cameo back in 2013. Guess that's just one of those years lost to time. Fun facts of 2013? Grand Theft Auto 5 came out that year, Yahoo purchased this hell site and the UFC brought women into the organization for the first time ever. The Reds spoke openly about wanting to spend a bit in the offseason and so they did, flexing some financial muscle with deals for Mike Moustakas, Shogo Akiyama and Nick Castellanos to help out a lineup featuring the likes of Joey Votto, Nick Senzel and Eugenio Suarez. If the Reds are going to make a serious run of things, it'll likely be on the arms of a rejuvenated Sonny Gray, mercurial Trevor Bauer and the league's best kept secret to casual fans Luis Castillo. There's obviously going to be concerns about a team that hits a lot of dingers but strikes out a bunch and a somewhat unheralded bullpen but the Reds have power, they've gotten better and they've got a cadre of arms to flex at any time. Also? The NL Central figures to be up in the air as the Cubs seem to coast with the core they have until the rebuild comes around, the Cardinals and Brewers underwent massive changes and the Pirates figure to be flat out bad. There's never been a more clear path for the Reds to make some October noise.

3- Los Angeles Angels Last Playoff Appearance: 2014

The year is 2014. In the real world,  Colorado legalizes the purchase of wacky tobacky, selfies became "a thing" in need of forever going away and the occulus rift creates a youtube grift genre. Sports wise? The MLB struggles through record rating woes, the Cowboys finally break through in the Jason Garrett tenure with a 12-4 record, the UFC is undergoing massive upheaval as stars retire or are suspended for PEDs, Bellator hosts its first PPV which in turn leads to the ousting of Bjorn Rebney for Scott Coker and LeBron James leaves Miami to go back where it all began in Cleveland. That's the last time the Angels saw a playoff game and it's been beaten to death at this point. "WHY DON'T THE ANGELS MAKE THE PLAYOFFS DURING MIKE TROUT'S PRIME?!" is tired and done to death but for those of you who feel the same way, 2020 marks the BEST chance for that to become a fad question (or perhaps just morph into "WHY CAN'T THE BEST PLAYER IN BASEBALL WIN THE WORLD SERIES ON HIS OWN?!") since the Angels are pretty damn loaded for bare. With the Astros about to endure a pretty weird season and the A's always lurking, the Angels will roll into the year with three bonafide superstars in Anthony Rendon, Shohei Otani and Mike Trout. The pieces around them aren't bad shakes either as Andrelton Simmons is a defensive whiz, David Fletcher is one of those solid under the radar types and the rotation isn't flashy but it should be competent with minor league depth to make moves if they see a big fish out there. The Angels would've been higher up had they gotten Ross Stripling and Joc Pedersen in a deal but since that fell off, I feel like 3rd behind the Reds and Phillies is a fine spot to put them in.

4- Chicago White Sox Last Playoff Appearance: 2008

2008 will probably best be known as the year of change headlined by the election of Barack Obama as President of the United States. It was the year Fidel Castro stepped down in Cuba. China got the olympics in Beijing and people were TOTALLY cool about that with nary any controversy whatsoever. Beyond that? 2008 was the year I got into MMA and that was a special time, dudes. It was also the year where the White Sox saw their last real sustained succeed with its last postseason appearance. The White Sox feel like they've been in a rebuild since pretty much the end of the Ozzie Guillen tenure and despite multiple managers, multiple attempts to figure it out, rebuilds aplenty and some damn good talent coming through the organization, it's been a rough go of it for the majority of 2010 to 2019. Put it this way, the LAST time the White Sox made the playoffs, Chris Sale was a 22 year old rookie and Paul Konerko was still an active player. They've got a chance to kick off this next decade as a bit of a sleeper team in the Central. This team can hit and one can assume that another year of development for phenom talents like Yoan Moncada and Eloy Jiminez can only help. Tim Anderson for better or worse has a style and swagger that generates attention but it is fair to remember that for at least one half a season, he was a phenomenal player worthy of the acclaim. The White Sox have tried hard to secure elite free agents (Manny Machado and Zack Wheeler) but it's been a bust so at this point it's going to be up to them to draft, develop and trade for it. It would not surprise me if the White Sox are good enough in June and July to make a big deal to try and push them over the hump and chase for the second wild card.

5- San Diego Padres Last Playoff Appearance: 2006

The Padres last made the playoffs in the year of the Nintendo Wii. Floyd Mayweather hadn't even come up with his Money Mayweather gimmick yet! Lost to baseball obscurity, the Padres had at the very least an interesting team out west. The likes of Manny Machado, Fernando Tatis Jr, arguably the worst defensive outfield in the history of the universe and freakishly good young arms like Chris Paddack and Joey Luchessi at least made them fun to watch. They weren't "good" but this is a team that was still struggling to balance expensive veterans with clout (Machado, Eric Hosmer, Will Meyers) with really good young talent trying to figure things out. The Padres figure to be better with a full season of Tatis Jr, more production from guys like Hosmer and Machado plus improvements in the outfield with Tommy Pham and Trent Grisham (hold your jokes, Nats fans) figure to give this team a chance. There's a pretty good bullpen (Emilio Pagan is a sneaky nice pick up) and plenty of talent in their 26 man roster. The NL West has so much legit top talent with the D-Backs and Dodgers figuring to be really good that it's hard to make an argument for the Padres to be a playoff contender but they figure to try and trying is truly half the battle.

6- Miami Marlins Last Playoff Appearance: 2003

It's kind of a bummer that we didn't get our decennial Marlins "The fuck?" World Series win but they made up for it by giving us Jeffrey Loria and David Samson fucking things up for most of the decade leading to Derek FUCKING Jeter opting to get into the management game much to the chagrin of most folks on all sides. The Marlins are in the midst of rebuilding....again. Don't expect them to compete but they've got some good talent to at least want to see play. Brian Anderson, Caleb Smith, Jorge Alfaro and a bundle of veteran signings that will at the very least make the Marlins a fun trade partner in July will keep this team relevant. Wouldn't surprise me if the Marlins flirt with a 20 win swing from where they were last year.

7- Seattle Mariners Last Playoff Appearance: 2001

My god man. The Mariners were SO close in 2018, winning 89 games and finishing a few spots out of a Wild Card spot. As if they decided that this core couldn't do it, the Mariners went to work tearing their team apart and were rewarded with a pretty blegh squad that was once again picked apart at the deadline. To their credit they have some spiffy talent worth watching, namely the infield duo of JP Crawford and Shed Long. They’ve also got some fun young arms who might take the next step. Just don't expect them to win many games.

8- Detroit Tigers Last Playoff Appearance: 2014

The Tigers are aways away from being contenders. They're not trying to be contenders. They're in the midst of what could best be described as a multiple year rebuild after riding out the end days of the core from the start of the 2010's. They will be bad but god bless 'em for embracing it.

[achrisstevenson]

The Illustrious Wendy Van Camp Interview!

Author Interview: Chris J. Breedlove

October 23, 2019

Wendy Van Camp

2 Comments

I asked Author Chris Breedlove what his motto for being a writer was.  He answered:

A Writer is… A humble, receptive student and negotiator But the heart that beats within his/her breast Is a determined savage Unfamiliar with surrender

Please welcome this savvy science fiction author to No Wasted Ink.

My name is Chris Harold Stevenson and I’m 67 years young. I go by the pen name Christy J. Breedlove for my YA books and stories. Yes, I changed gender entirely. That’s another story.

My early writing accomplishment were multiple hits within a few years: In my first year of writing back in 1987, I wrote three SF short stories that were accepted by major slick magazines which qualified me for the Science Fiction Writers of America, and at the same time achieved a Finalist award in the L. Ron Hubbard Writers of the Future Contest. This recognition garnered me a top gun SF agent at the time, Richard Curtis Associates. My first novel went to John Badham (Director) and the producers, the Cohen Brothers. Only an option, but an extreme honor. The writer who beat me out of contention for a feature movie was Michael Crichton’s Jurassic Park. My book was called Dinothon.

A year after that I published two best-selling non-fiction books and landed on radio, TV, in every library in the U.S. and in hundreds of newspapers.

I have been trying to catch that lightning in a bottle ever since. My YA dystopian novel, The Girl They Sold to the Moon won the grand prize in a publisher’s YA novel writing contest, went to a small auction and got tagged for a film option. So, My latest release is Sceamcatcher: Web World, and it’s showing some promise. I’m getting there, I hope!

When did you first consider yourself a writer?

I considered myself a writer when I published the two shorts in Amazing Stories magazine. I actually considered myself an author after my first non-fiction book was published and hit the media. It seems I had to have legitimate credits in order to claim such status.

Can you share a little about your current book with us?

I can give you the basic summary, or the extended blurb:

When seventeen-year-old Jory Pike cannot shake the hellish nightmares of her parent’s deaths, she turns to an old family heirloom, a dream catcher. Even though she’s half-blood Chippewa, Jory thinks old Native American lore is so yesterday, but she’s willing to give it a try. However, the dream catcher has had its fill of nightmares from an ancient and violent past. After a sleepover party, and during one of Jory’s most horrific dream episodes, the dream catcher implodes, sucking Jory and her three friends into its own world of trapped nightmares. They’re in an alternate universe—locked inside of an insane web world filled with murders, beasts, and thieves. How can they find the center of the web where all good things are allowed to pass? Where is the light of salvation? Are they in hell?

What inspired you to write this book?

It all started with a dream catcher. This iconic item, which is rightfully ingrained in Indian lore, is a dream symbol respected by the culture that created it. It is mystifying, an enigma that that prods the imagination. Legends about the dream catcher are passed down from multiple tribes. There are variations, but the one fact that can be agreed upon is that it is a nightmare entrapment device, designed to sift through evil thoughts and images and only allow pleasant and peaceful dreams to enter into the consciousness of the sleeper.

I wondered what would happen to a very ancient dream catcher that was topped off with dreams and nightmares. What if the nightmares became too sick or deathly? What if the web strings could not hold any more visions? Would the dream catcher melt, burst, vanish, implode? I reasoned that something would have to give if too much evil was allowed to congregate inside of its structure. I found nothing on the Internet that offered a solution to this problem—I might have missed a relevant story, but nothing stood out to me. Stephen King had a story called Dream Catcher, but I found nothing in it that was similar to what I had in mind. So I took it upon myself to answer such a burning question. Like too much death on a battlefield could inundate the immediate location with lost and angry spirits, so could a dream catcher hold no more of its fill of sheer terror without morphing into something else, or opening up a lost and forbidden existence. What would it be like to be caught up in another world inside the webs of a dream catcher, and how would you get out? What would this world look like? How could it be navigated? What was the source of the exit, and what was inside of it that threatened your existence? Screamcatcher: Web World, the first in the series, was my answer. I can only hope that I have done it justice.

Do you have a specific writing style?

I’m a fruit salad of other known writer’s influences. Oh, like what I consider stylists: Poul Anderson, Virgin Planet, Peter Benchley, The Island and Jaws, Joseph Wambaugh, The Onion Field and Black Marble, Michael Crichton, Jurassic Park, Alan Dean Foster, Icerigger trilogy, and some Stephen King. Anne Rice impresses with just about anything she has written. I think it’s the humor and irony that attracts me the most–and it’s all character-related

How did you come up with the title of this book?

After I had the idea/premise for the book, having researched similar works, if any, I found that I had something very unique. It dawned on me to name the book Screamcatcher since it was a play on words and it sounded impactful. Again, I researched that word and only found that it was used in a short story about a kid having a tooth extraction. I knew then that I was home free. I was continuously complimented by all of the publishers and editors who saw the title. It’s the first book in the series, and I have sub-titles for the other two as well, which are sold and just about ready for editing.

Is there a message in your novel that you want readers to grasp?

I’m not very heavy-handed when it comes to delivering messages in my books. I want to avoid any preaching at all costs. I do include the basic/standard survival, loyalty, courage and persistence themes in my young characters, as well as emotional growth and cooperation. I did hide, or rather include, a very deep and subtle message in the story that I think most will gloss over or not recognize altogether. And that is my belief that sometimes the nice guy finishes first and gets the gal. I wanted something that swerved away from the controlling, domineering alpha male that is so often seen in other works of YA and romance. I wanted a slow burn sweet romance that was touching. Quite a few reviewers recognized this message and I got kudos for it. That was a RELIEF.

Are experiences in this book based on someone you know, or events in your own life?

The main character Jorlene (Jory) is named after my sister. Although she does not resemble the FMC physically, she does so in an emotional sense. Her boyfriend, Choice Daniels, is named after my great-nephew. All of my books contain the names of my extended family members. And there are parts of them that show through in the personalities of the fictional characters.

What authors have most influenced your life? What about them do you find inspiring?

Other than those stylists mentioned above, I had direct contact with members of the Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers of America. Alan Dean Foster, Richard Curtis, Robert Bloch, Bob Heinlein, Clive Barker, and others. From their Youtube instruction videos and articles, JK Rowling, Anne Rice, and Stephen King have inspired me tremendously with their no-nonsense attitude about hammering those keys in spite of depression, lack of motivation or pure laziness.

If you had to choose, is there a writer would you consider a mentor? Why?

That honor would go to Poul Anderson who wrote back to me habitually and gave me guidance in the industry when I needed it the most. He took out his valuable time to befriend me and answer so many questions. Can you tell I’m a dinosaur yet?

Who designed the cover of your book? Why did you select this illustrator?

Carlone Andrus of Melange Books, Fire & Ice YA division rendered the cover after reading the book. I had a different idea in mind, but she absolutely nailed it. The compliments have never stopped coming. Most of the plot is revealed on the cover but you would have to search very hard to put it all together.

Do you have any advice for other writers?

Watch your spending on ads–they can be grossly ineffective. Use social media and generously interact with fellow writers and readers. Don’t abuse FB and Twitter solely for the purpose of “Buy My Book.” Join writing groups and learn from the pros. Ask politely for reviews–don’t pressure, harass or intimidate. Be creative. Target your genre readers. Offer incentives and freebies. Craft a newsletter and send it out bi-monthly. Don’t take critiques as personal attacks–learn from honest opinions. Don’t despair. Never give up. Revenge query. I run a writer’s advocate blog and I pull no punches.

Do you have anything specific that you want to say to your readers?

If you think that you’ve had it tough, I recommend you watch Magic Beyond Words, the life story of Joanne Kathleen Rowling. Books just don’t happen. They are nurtured and raised from infancy, just like a budding writer is. This business might quit you, but you cannot quit the business. Stay active and attentively writing.

Chris J. Breedlove Sylvania, Alabama

FACEBOOK TWITTER AMAZON PAGE BLOG

Screamcatcher: Web World

[thisisej]

s5 predictions and thoughts

 I just wanted to get them out there before s5 premieres! See how close I get or far off I am, buuuut some of it is also probably my fanfic brain running away with me. Because half of this I wanted to write about or started writing about, lmao. 

So far, beside our main plot of defeating Zarkon and dismantling his oppressive empire, here are our subplots and some thoughts on the connections to those subplots:

Where is Sam Holt

could possibly tie in to why Matt had a bounty

New storage technology from the Garrison 

Shiro and Operation Kuron

also possibly coincides with where is Sam

will play into the final Big Bad

Lotor 

Wanting to push the Galra Empire into a new age with himself at the helm-Lotor doesn’t care for his father’s rule, and his speech at the arena does seem to reflect his plans

The Sincline ships 

Zarkon’s decision to issue a kill on sight order for the prince

Haggar regaining her memories

the possible deterioration of Zarkon’s body (is he slowly dying?)

Lotor not seeming to realize Haggar and Honerva are the same person

Lotor’s plan for Team Voltron

Keith’s family

who Acxa is to Keith 

Kolivan and his relationship to Keith

Keith’s mother

Allura’s magic 

Allura has a lot of potential but has not been trained

Too Many Pilots Too Little Lions

Keith leaving the team

Lance’s arc

I’ve been thinking about all of these while considering what may happen next. Eventually all of these are going to have to tie together enough to push the story into its final arc, where I believe the rift will reopen and unleash the true Big Bad: the rift monsters. That’s Voltron’s real goal, even if it’s not the team’s, that’s what Voltron is really there for: the rift and these inter-dimensional horrors. And it’s going to be the state of the team after making discoveries, the resulting trust/distrust and new relationships as a result of those discoveries, that is going to affect the outcome of the final battle or even how it’s fought. 

 The rift’s not gone, even if it’s been unopened (dormant?) for 10,000 years. Haggar’s work, according to Lotor, held up well. So Haggar is set up to play a huge part in the story’s climax. So you have to wonder how Haggar and her work is going to help aid the Big Bad or push it into the open, and what that possibly has to do with Operation Kuron. Haggar says Shiro could have been the Empire’s greatest weapon, which is why it’s very possible she’s at the head of Operation Kuron. I’m also gonna guess Sam isn’t just some working slave; I’m sure wherever he is he’s comfortable enough because he’s probably working on Operation Kuron. After all, Pidge did mention the Garrison was working on a new  technology.

 Maybe Sam does it because he’s being forced to, maybe because he’s decided the Empire is too strong and has chosen a side, believing it would keep his family safe or safe enough. Matt isn’t aware of this, obviously, because he left a code for Sam if he were to ever escape, but remember: What they don’t know won’t hurt ‘em and I think that’s really gonna come into play when we find Sam. If Sam is working for the Galra, he has to be aware Matt was rescued by Rebels, especially if Matt’s enslavement was used as leverage to keep him working-he knows Matt wouldn’t choose to go back to the Galra. So, what’s a scientist holed up in a lab to do in order to get his rebel child back when he can’t risk official Empire resources to go get Matt without getting him in trouble or being attacked by the rebels, let alone, know where the heck he is? Hire an expert to go find him and bring him back by force. 

It’s likely Matt got word he had a bounty on his head. Since his skills were valuable, the Rebel forces did what they could to keep him alive, and pushed him underground. Still, bounty hunter wasn’t going to kill Matt. Yes, he says he’ll take something over nothing, but Matt is worth far more alive, and I’m sure he wants to get paid. He was probably ready to beat them into unconscious pulps, but kill them? Nah. They’re too valuable. Immediately after saying this, he tries electrocuting Matt into submission. His fighting style seems to back this up; he’s not trying to kill Matt. He defends but doesn’t strike to kill. His electrocuting whips are a special kind of weapon-if Pidge hadn’t been there to disrupt Matt’s electrocution, bounty hunter here would have just kept him tied up until he lost consciousness and taken off with him. Matt does take a bit to recover enough to sit up after. Bounty hunter really only goes on the offensive with Pidge. So:

Where is Sam Holt

 Sam may be working with the Galra, putting the Garrison’s new technology to use with Operation Kuron…specifically putting it to use with Shiro. 

Sam hired the bounty hunter to retrieve Matt for him, so he would have his son by his side

 Operation Kuron, Haggar’s plans, and Shiro 

may tie in to the inevitable reopening of the rift. If Shiro is a sleeper agent who has instructions and a mission that’s going to activate at some point, there’s going to be a point where he goes into Empire Mode and does what he’s been instructed to do, maybe unwittingly, maybe against his will, maybe in a sort of hypnotic state, unless someone can take care of it beforehand! In which case, if they do, then I suppose the mystery will be Shiro figuring out exactly what that purpose was supposed to be and how to use it to fight the Empire. Ideas on what his purpose is:

His purpose is to open something Haggar, for whatever reason, can’t herself that’s related to the rift, hence his hand. (Where’s the ‘Shiro is a key’ meta?) Maybe this mission could kill him, hence the possible multiple Shiros. Especially if they perfected this storage technology with Shiro.

His purpose is to dismantle Team Voltron from the inside, but given the multiple Shiros I’m dubious about that. What’s the purpose of another Shiro if your way inside ever gets found out? 

I don’t think Haggar really cares about what happens to the paladins…or to Voltron, as long as they’re contained/destroyed so they can’t meddle. Zarkon is the one obsessed with Voltron. Haggar’s mission is keeping Zarkon alive, especially now that he seems to be weaker looking at that new armor, and gathering quintessence for her own goals.

His purpose is to retrieve something for the Empire Haggar can’t herself for whatever reason that’s related to the rift and the use of the storage technology-Maybe Shiro’s a vessel. Again, it’s possible it could kill him, hence another Shiro in case it goes wrong-so they can try again. Maybe Shiro was their first success and they don’t want to let go of that.

still begs the question of why they wouldn’t relentlessly hunt him down though, but again-clones? maybe?

Allura’s Magic:

Prince Bandor and Romelle may be introduced and might become important recurring characters. Apparently VLD has a new male voice actor? I have no idea where that post went.

romelle is the armored rebel  which can be read about on radioactivesupersonic’s blog (recommended if you love vld meta and analysis) and as explained again further down

Prince Bandor and Romelle will be imperative in shifting Pollux away from Zarkon’s rule, which would be a major win for Voltron and getting Empire-loyal planets to shift their attention. Bandor will be aged up though, and likely be the paladins’ age.

Romelle and Bandor have a brother in past versions named Avok who sided with Zarkon and became a robest. But instead of a robeast, he will be a druid here. Maybe this revelation will lead to the knowledge that the druids of Haggar’s circle have Polluxian blood, pushing the paladins toward Pollux

modern Altea would basically be Pollux, maybe a terraformed planet we have not been introduced to, but they’re loyal to Zarkon. They chose Zarkon instead of Alfor when the war started and due to this were spared and fled the planet, and often intermarry.  

Allura will gain a mentor for her magic as a result  (maybe a grudging older Romelle, who maybe is not magical, but maybe has a reason to know certain exercises in magic, like forms of meditation, etc, because of Avok, or maybe knows someone who can teach Allura again because of Avok)

Keith’s Family

Acxa will hope to find refuge from the Empire with whoever raised her, bringing us more backstory and possibly prove the Keith and Axca are siblings theory.

If Acxa is not Keith’s sister, she might still know who his mother is- Keith may remind Acxa of his mother. 

Kolivan knows Keith’s mother personally (this I’m guessing because of how Kolivan reacted in the Blade of Marmora episode. His reactions were always the most prominent and lasted the longest. I believe he was personally testing Keith too by putting him through the trials-his logic might have been he couldn’t be sure of who Keith was if he didn’t), and is possibly her brother or her father, and Keith and Kolivan will have a discussion that is brought on by Keith’s almost-sacrifice, which will jar Kolivan (who does care about Keith) and bring forth new information but ultimately, he will not know where she is now, or if she’s even alive, which is how Acxa will later play in to that if the generals later rejoin Lotor while he’s still with the coalition

Lotor

If Narti is somehow alive and her death was an elaborate ruse to cut Haggar off she will return, maybe as Merla, to regather the generals. Lotor reunited with his generals and the Sincline ships will push whatever agenda he has forward.

 I just think Narti’s death is something to pause over-Lotor and Narti stare at each other, aware of what’s happening though Lotor is taken by surprise, and Narti doesn’t even try to dodge when she is more than capable of getting away. It would be lazy if she just stood there for convenience’s sake. She could have mind controlled him to get away. I’m sure she’d be more than able to hold her own against Lotor! So why didn’t she?? Also I find Narti really interesting and I want her to come back so elaborate ruse works for me.

Narti regathering the generals might give us a reason to explore where the generals went, as well as propel us into important backstories or revelations which could tie back into Keith as explained later

Lotor will discover it was Keith whose life he saved

It may be Lotor who reveals that Keith almost sacrificed himself  which might add some interesting team angst and drama

It may be Lotor who realizes Shiro’s been tampered with. After all, he has experience with Haggar’s tampering and can recognize it, as we all very well know. After all, foiling Haggar’s plans works in his favor, too.

If Lotor figures this out and Shiro and the team are saved from an early rift opening as a result, the paladins will probably put some trust him which could make an eventual betrayal that much worse and the team easier to fool

Lotor will genuinely aid the coalition for a time. After all, the enemy of my enemy is my friend.

If Lotor doesn’t realize Haggar and Honerva are the same person it may affect his overall goals later, or how he goes about them, especially since he seems to admire Honerva’s work 

Too Many Pilots, Too Little Lions

keith will not rejoin the team until the end of, or near the end of,  the season

keith will need to have a Moment to realize he needs to rejoin the team.

I don’t have a lot on this one okay let’s see

I can see the team eventually returning to their original lions by the end of the show, so I guess these aren’t really s5 predictions but ideas for the end. I mean, their armor never changes, and that’s gotta be for a reason, and their original bonds were built up to be the strongest, but now that the team’s in disarray, the lions need to accommodate

This is all because of Shiro’s arc. He was taken in s2 for whatever his purpose is yes, but if he’s important to starting it, maybe he can properly close it himself too.

If that’s the case, Shiro has an important job to do in order to end the opening of the rift, and he’s going to need to be elsewhere, which means someone is going to have to fly Black in his absence. So, the lions being fluid and the team having figured that out before the end of the world makes sense to make up for that eventuality without all the terrible fumbling, because it already happened. And it doesn’t invalidate their original bonds.

And of course we have Lance. Considering his amazing moment with Allura, while she’s the heart of Voltron, Lance is really being set up to be the heart of the team 

he’s really going to grow in his support role, and I do think it’s going to have significance in Keith returning, especially since it was Lance who originally introduced the problem, so Lance might help close the issue too, and it will be a stepping stone for his character

On possible romance, relationships, and other predictions:

if there’s going to be any romance the first subtle hints of it will be seen this season. I’m always up for a ship free ending though. 

keith is going to have to be confronted about his almost sacrifice since he will not be talking about it. It was a scary experience, so I expect it should be talked about. If the whole team doesn’t confront him first, the paladin who does take up the job will likely become Keith’s love interest because when has that not happened

allura and lotor’s relationship will be a complete inversion, minus romance and obsessive behavior. Allura will take an angry interest, because lotor is half altean. She wants to know how and why. i’m guessing they will both be taken by surprise by each other’s race and not know the other personally

this might also tie in to allura becoming aware of pollux’s existence

keith and lotor will have a face off moment that starts off tense and dissolves into non-action and a wary, mutual agreement. 

If it's Keith who is meant to eventually have a love interest, this character will be central to his Moment

Keith and Allura will have a one on one convo once he rejoins the team that will refer back to their previous convo in s4

Edited multiple times after posting lol