#its 4:30am i cant think of anything funny

[funky-vg-beats]

she funky on my vg till I beats ‼️‼️‼️‼️

[latriii]

𐄹 DEJA VU ? — y.jw x f!reader ★

| OO20. THE CHANGE 4 THEM

thursday 8:30am — Seoul High

the news about yn and jungwon being together has gotten around the school, they were both a bit taken aback by the sudden news about them a couple, but it felt awkward. things were never made official and riki “exposing” them made things even more weird.

they were both uncomfortable, but yn did approach jungwon and asked him to walk with her to rooftop. she was more upset than she thought she would’ve been. riki always airing out their business really set her off.

at first, the posts were funny and harmless , but when it came to her and jungwon, yn felt differently. she was embarrassed and unsure of how to process the posts. she really hated the fact that everyone knew what was going on between her and her potential future boyfriend.

“jungwon why would you let riki post that?” the girl stared at the boy, he nibbled on his bottom lip, feeling unsure about what to say.

“I’m sorry. It wasn’t my intention to make any of this happen. he just doesn’t understand boundaries..” he replied, being completely honest with the girl.

“What did you expect would happen?” yn inquired, crossing her arms and leaning against the fence as the wind blew through her silky hair.

jungwon stayed silent, knowing that yn had gotten him there. he didn’t know what he expected and right now he just felt bad. he really did like yn and he knew she liked him back but riki doing this was just too much.

“rIki just wanted us to settle things once and for all, he thought this would help.” the boy glanced at the girl, he had been watching her facial expressions. it hasn’t changed since they started this conversation. she had a downturned face. oh, it was still gorgeous of course, but she was just so obviously upset.

“I know he thinks hes helping us get together but what he did was not his place. i want you to do the talking not him.” yn said, her voice wavering slightly as she spoke.

“i fucking like you and i hate how everyone knows everything about us when i just want to spend time with you without the stares and whispers!” yn continued, her voice was stronger now, her eyes flashing in determination.

“I don’t want anyone else deciding or interfering with our relationship. everyone has had an opinion on us since i moved here because of that stupid rumor that your ex made and honestly, im sick of it. i just want us to be true to each other and for people to stop, and i know you cant do anything about it but please. just tell riki to stop.”

the two never realized how much they were changing for the better, how much support they were giving each other until now. And it was all due to the things went through together.

jungwon listened to every word she said and took it all in, knowing exactly what she meant and how hard it was for her. he reached forward and took both her hands in his before speaking.

“im sorry yn, i had no idea how much this was effecting you. i like you so much its killing me how much i never realized this was hurting you. i cant make any promises like, getting people to stop talking, but i can tell you that i'll do what i can to make sure riki stops posting.” jungwon gave a gentle squeeze to her hands, trying to reassure her as best he could that he would take care of it.

and so he did. after kissing yn on the cheek and walking her to class, he spoke to riki and did his best to make him understand how important it was for yn to get the respect she deserved.

riki agreed and promised to stop posting anything about them. it was him who started this whole relationship though, so jungwon wasn’t completely mad at him.

if riki never asked him to distract yn at that party, they probably would’ve never had this type of connection. so even though jungwon had kissed yn and pretended not to know her, it all worked out in the end.

riki still felt bad so he agreed to help jungwon surprise yn so he could ask her to officially be his girlfriend. and when the time came, he really put in the effort, making something work for them.

m.list — prev next

| 𐄹 DEJA VU would be word that went though yn’s mind when she saw the class president at her new school. the uncanny resemblance YANG JUNGWON had with the guy SATO YN kissed at a party last weekend ran through the girls mind. but there was one problem, they were complete opposites. they aren’t same person, RIGHT ?

latri’s zz … Im sad this chapter is sad

TAGLIST @eulris @yenqa @jungwonsgfnameyukie @taegyuul @chaechae-23 @astrae4 @winteringdream @l0veflrws @leaderwon @wtfhyuck @softpia @kyyuri @jangw2nyo @curly-fr13s @baekhyunstruly @wonioml @sydneylam777 @woncheecks @soobsdior @beomsbeanie @j-wyoung @ilovewonyo @officiallyjaehyuns @hyuckscore @maimoirs @haefims @pr-da @nokacchan @sserafimez @heartsforjngwn @lhees01 @kyuupidwrites @shinsou-rii @ensrfm @strwberrydinosaur @cwsana @rikimylove @haoqwrld @soobisrealgfnotfake @sunooluver @wonyoungsvirus @aeminju @tzyuki @enhapocketz @kyanmeai

[barnesandrogersfanfics]

Rose Coloured Glasses - Part 4

The next morning i was up and ready to go by 6:30am after only a few hours sleep! Frank was insatiable last night and now I was exhausted! Maybe id be able to sleep in the car on the way to Vermont.

"Okay i'm gonna go" Frank said wrapping his arms around my waist from behind and kissing my neck as i started to pull out a couple of travel mugs to make some coffee.

"Mmm okay" i mumbled leaning back against him.

"Can i call you or are you off limits til you get back?"

"You can call, text. I'll answer when i can"

"Good"

"You'll probably forget all about me while im gone" i chuckled. His arms tightened around me and i felt him shake his head.

"Not gonna happen sweetheart"

"We'll see" i turned in his arms and kissed him properly before playfully pushing him towards the door.

"Okay i'm going" he laughed catching my lips one more time "i'll call you later, have a safe journey".

"Bye Frank".

Once Frank had left i double checked i had everything and carried on making the two cups of coffee to go.

Andy: Im outside :)

Y/N: on my way.

As i approached Andy's car he got out and greeted me with a smile taking my bag and putting it in the trunk next to his. I couldn't help but notice he was dressed more casual today, wearing black jeans and black Henley.... he looked good! Andy ALWAYS looked good but there was something about seeing this more relaxed side to him that made me smile.

"I made you some coffee for the journey" i held out the cup to him shaking my head slightly to clear it of thinking about how good my boss looked!

"Oh my god you must have read my mind" he smiled and accepted the cup before we both got in the car.

I spent the first half hour of the journey covering my mouth as i yawned, Andy had caught it a few times but didn't say anything which i was grateful for! When we finally arrived at the hotel he grabbed both our bags from the car insisting that he carry mine.

"Do you wanna sit down and wait with the bags and i'll go check in and grab the room keys?" He turned to me and asked pointing to the sofa's in the corner.

"Yeah sure" i nodded quickly with a smile. Once i was alone i took the chance to check my phone, i had felt it vibrating a while ago but didnt want to check it in-front of Andy.

Frank: Hows the journey?

Having fun?

Y/N: Journey was fine, i spent most of it trying to stay awake because SOMEONE kept me up all night lol

Frank: Didnt hear u complaining last night babe 😈

Y/N: im not stupid thats why! 😂

Y/N: i gotta go, just checking in. I'll text when im in the room x

Andy walked towards me looking a bit sheepish and scratching his beard.

"All sorted?" I asked as i stood up.

"Kinda, there's been a mix up with the bookings and they only have my room. I tried to book another one but their fully booked because of some event"

"Oh"

"They can bring a cot up to my room though, you can have the bed"

"Okay, i guess theres not much more we can do" i shrugged, i could hardly insist on going home just because we had to share a room! We were both adults for christ sake. Taking both bags again Andy led the way to the elevators and hit the button for the 8th floor.

"Im so sorry about this Y/N they must have double booked us somehow. I feel awful" he sighed before dropping his head down and slowly shaking it.

"Its fine Andy, i mean we wont even be at the room much. Its just somewhere to get a few hours sleep"

"Yeah i guess your right, i'll buy you dinner tonight to apologise"

"Hate to break it to you boss but you were already paying for dinner" i chuckled as the doors opened and i stepped out the elevator "what room is it?"

"Um.....815"

I took the keycard from Andy and quickly located the room.

"You in a rush?" He laughed from behind me.

"Sorry i really need to pee" i replied stepping into the room with a quiet "wow!" the room was huge and obviously very expensive....It was more like a suite!

Of course he'd have one of the fancier rooms.

After i was finished in the bathroom i pulled my cell from my pocket and pulled up my messages with Frank.

Y/N: Hey, you'll never believe what happened??!

Frank: Hey sweetheart. What happened?

Y/N: The hotel double booked us so there's only one room!

Now i have to stay with Andy!

Frank: ur right, i dont believe it! He so obviously planned this to happen!

Y/N: Its a bit odd i have to admit, but their fully booked for an event in town. Its fine though their bringing a cot up to the room, Andy said he'll sleep there and i can have the bedroom

Frank: Make sure u lock ur door!

Y/N: Very funny! Lol

Frank: Im serious! Lol

U need me to come rescue u??

Y/N:  No i'm good lol i gotta work.

"You okay in there?" Andy suddenly called from outside and then i realised how long id been in the bathroom!

"Yeah!" I called back tucking my phone back in my pocket and opening the door, Andy looked over at me smiling.

"I thought maybe you fell in or something"

I shook my head laughing "No, i was just texting a friend and got distracted".

Andy nodded with a tight lipped smile on his face as if he wanted to say something but thought better of it.

"I eh, i left your bag in the bedroom" he said pointing towards the bedroom.

"Thanks"

"Im just gonna call my friend and find out where to meet then we can get on with what needs doing"

"Okay, i'll check the emails while you do that make sure nothing urgent has come up back home"

"Great".

We had been waiting down in the hotel bar for Andy's friend Paul to arrive for over an hour now and there was no sign of him. Andy was getting more and more agitated as the time passed. He finally grabbed his phone and excused himself, i watched as he stormed outside and made a call, pacing up and down past the window shaking his head....10 minutes later he came strutting back in and sat on the barstool next to me.

"everything okay?"

"His not coming" Andy shook his head "he said he got called to an important meeting and now cant meet me until tomorrow morning!"

"Oh..."

"Such a bullshitter! His probably with some woman" he moaned "put all that away Y/N" Andy nodded to my laptop and notebook that i had out.

"We done for the day?"

"Yeah fuck it, how about we go back to the room and get changed into some comfier clothes then dinner and a few drinks?"

"Sure, sounds good boss, lets go" i smiled as i quickly tucked the laptop and notebook away in my bag....I couldn't wait to get into my comfy clothes and get something to eat.

Everything taglist: @jesseswartzwelder @dumblani @barnesandrogersworld @patzammit

Rose Coloured Glasses taglist: @readermia @princess-evans-addict @jennmurawski13 @matsumama

[yntcdtyler]

so here’s my lover secret session’s story... 02/08/2019 london 🏹🇬🇧

i got my dm on twitter on july 16th at 5:15pm and i looked at it thinking someone was trying to boo boo the fool me and it was really gonna say something like “stream ME!” so i opened it not thinking much of it and my heart literally SANK when i saw it was actually REAL. i got the phone call 4 days after from a girl called sara who was from Taylor Nation, she told me everything and i was literally in the storage room in work crying.

so it’s finally august 2nd.. i got up at 5am cause i literally had 4 different trains and 2 ubers to catch, when i finally got to my hotel it was around 11am, i checked in and got ready and went to the meeting point. i was literally the first one there so i panicked thinking i was at the wrong place but more people started to show up and immediately everyone formed little friendship groups who they seemed to have stayed with the whole day which was insane. i met lisa and emma which i’d recognised from twitter because we’d been following each other for so long and then georgia, evie & shiv all came over and we all just bonded and instantly became friends and realised we we’re the brits of the group, there were SO many international fans and it was amazing seeing people come from all over the world! our group was first on the bus and i’m not sure why but we were literally all crying like wtf was going on?? we drove past a few ambulances thinking ‘that’s gonna be our ride home after tonight’ cause at this point i’m like dying and then we finally got to THE HOUSE.

we all go inside, the ME! playlist was on, there was a huge moose head on the wall which we all became really intrigued by, a huge mirror to see ourselves ugly crying, there was food & drinks and little m&m’s with ‘lover’ and hearts on them and i have no idea what was going on in my mind at this point, like i didn’t know what to expect.

so then we all go to the living room we’re there was a bunch of cushions on the floor and a chair and speakers in front of us and i KNEW what was about to go down lads, it’s about to happen, we’re about to hear lover and i just wasn’t ready and i was sat THERE in front of the chair and a few minutes later... SHE COMES OUT FROM BEHIND THIS DOOR LOOKING LIKE LIKE AN ACTUAL GODDESS THAT JUST STEPPED OUT OF HEAVEN AND I DEAD ASS DIED RIGHT THERE THINKING ABOUT THAT AMBULANCE I SAW EARLIER ON CAUSE SHE JUST WASNT REAL. so she’s like “welcome to the lover secret sessions” and the noise that came out me was actually not human at all. she played half the album the first and kept apologising for ranting and going off topic which was so funny, she’s so adorable i was literally in awe. then was like “we’re gonna take a break so you can all go the bathroom, have a drink and stretch your legs” and then mentions she’s made us treats and everyone’s like OMG and she’s literally like “it’s just rice crispy treats i dyed in heart shapes” and it was just the funniest thing bc she’s just so sarcastic but they were the cutest things and just knowing she spent time making them was honestly insane. like i ate a rice crispy heart treat..made by taylor swift? sounds fake. so then as she’s passing them around, she’s goes into the garden and starts talking to everyone and thanking people’s parents and let everyone on her trampoline and just shouts “THESE ARE MY KIDS” with a glass of wine in her hand and it was such a taylor swift moment. it was just surreal like wtf? imagine bouncing on taylor swifts trampoline? i would’ve went on it but i wasn’t about to break my neck before listening to the rest of the album x

okay so we go back in to listen to the rest of the album and throughout the whole album listening part, i just kept crying and she kept looking at me and smiling and singing and i was just bloody in shock. there was one point during a song we’re me and georgia we’re holding onto each other crying and she just looks at us and tilts her head and gives us the most warming smile. right there we both died together it was unreal. but the album HOLY SHIT every song was INSANE. i found it so hard to pick a favourite so i have 3, this album is literally her BEST, and this coming from a speak now stan🤝 i was just the happiest i’ve ever been, it just seemed like a dream. seeing her sat there in front of me so happy and in such a good place, feeling so proud of this album and these songs just made my heart feel so full. what i was feeling in that moment is unexplainable. just pure happiness like i knew life doesn’t get any better than this... right it’s time for the meet and greets and everyone goes back in to the other room whilst they got ready and people started queuing then to go in and meet her, she spent so much time with every single person and seeing everyone’s faces coming out that room was so magical. the event was supposed to be over at 11pm and it’s literally 1:30am when it was my time to meet her. she’d literally been meeting people for HOURS and is 2 and half hours past the end time and she didn’t even mind. everyone was so eager to go inside that me and the girls decided to wait till the end.

so evie had just come out and now it’s my turn. i almost fainted, i was so dizzy and nervous and WHEN I TELL U I WAS PETRIFIED TO GO INSIDE, I ACTUALLY MEAN IT BECAUSE I WAS STOOD OUTSIDE THE DOOR REFUSING TO GO IN FOR ABOUT A MINUTE CAUSE I COULD JUST SEE HER STOOD THERE AND I WASN’T READY BECAUSE LIKE I’VE DREAMT ABOUT THIS MOMENT SINCE FOREVER. emma and lisa we’re stood there laughing trying to force me inside as well as a girl from TN. took me a good minute but i finally walked in, i walk over to her trying not to cry AGAIN and she’s stood there smiling at me and she says to me “it’s tyler isn’t it?” and i was like JDJSKDJD “yeah 😭😭😭😭” cause i didn’t think she knew who i was and i was just randomly picked by TN??? she then pulled me in for the biggest hug and i just felt like this is it, i’m gonna bloody pass out. I TOLD HER THAT WAITING IN THAT QUEUE TO MEET HER WAS LIKE WAITING FOR THE ELECTRIC CHAIR and i was like why tf did i just say that omg but she laughed and was like “omg hahaha it’s like waiting for the electric chair that’s so funny” then i gave her the lover necklace i’d gotten made for her so we had matching and she kept saying how much she loved and how beautiful it was. then said “i love your necklace” with a little smirk because i was wearing her ‘TS’ initial necklace and my heart just went HDAJHDJDDH. then she asked did i enjoy the day and i was like of course??? it was so amazing i couldn’t stop crying and she was like “aw i had so much fun, i love doing these” and then she asked how i’d gotten here and i told her that i had to take 4 trains and she looked so shocked and thanked me for doing that and asked if i was travelling afterwards and i told her i had a hotel and she goes “omg good, PLEASE don’t talk to any strangers” and i’m just like YEAH OF COURSE ANYTHING FOR U MISS SWIFT :’)))) i hugged her about 3 more times and i asked her about tour, and how she found me and she said she’d found me on tumblr and literally said “its tylovestaylor right?” and i was just like WHAT. THE. ACTUAL. FUCK. IM SCARED. cause i barely use tumblr because i’m the only one who reblogs myself??? and i’d gotten my dm on twitter so my mind was like wtf is going on right now?? i told her i changed my url and she said she’d follow me 🥺 then says “so do you wanna like... take a picture together or something?” YEAH OF COURSE, IM A BIT OF A MESS RN BUT ABSOLUTELY. she asks what i wanted to do for the photo like stand, sit, go near the piano? and i told her to choose because my mind was just all over the place and she says to me “i think one sitting down with our legs crossed over acting all (then does some pose) and stuff” i just couldn’t believe what was actually happening. we sit down next to each other and she grabs my hand and i’m just holding her and the photographer takes the photo and she tells me to have a look to see if i like it and i said i looked so bad and she goes “ITS SO CUTE, YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL AND PHOTOGENIC” then the photographer told me i was really photogenic and tay goes “SEE SHE EVEN SAID IT” did taylor swift..who invented photos and beauty... just call me beautiful and photogenic? surely not. so we took one more pic and she said she loved it so i loved it😭😭😭 we got up and hugged again and i just kept saying i love you and she told me i was beautiful and i was like SO ARE U???? and then i told her that i still don’t believe she’s real and she laughed. we hugged again i told her i loved her as i was walking out she shouts “please get home safely” and i said “have a safe flight wherever you’re going next” at the same time and she laughed and was like “OMG THANKYOU?” and i walked out and the emotions i was going through oh my god. i’d just met my favourite person in the entire world? like never in a million years did i think i’d ever meet her let alone get handpicked for secret sessions. i was in so much shock like it wasn’t real. that never happened? i’m still in shock now and literally crying writing this. she was so lovely and welcoming and spoke to me like she’d known me forever.

AND AFTER ALL THAT, SHE DECIDES SHE WANTS ME LITERALLY DEAD AND LIKES MY POST ON HERE FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER. RIGHT AFTER I’D MET HER.

i couldn’t get over how beautiful she is, inside and out like i already knew that but seeing her in real life is so different, she’s literally flawless and so cute and delicate and i’ll literally die for this woman. thankyou so much, from the bottom of my heart @taylorswift for choosing me out of 100m+ fans, i’ll never understand why i was chosen but i can’t explain how grateful i am. it was by far the best day i’ve ever had in my 18 years of being alive, nothing will ever come close to that moment. i cant wait for everyone else to hear this album, i miss you and your hugs already and i forgot to tell you because my mind was blank but i’m insanely proud of you and will support you forever. promise.

[btsjfans]

Our Song (pt 6)

Summary: School playboy, and jock Jungkook is the last person you’d expect to be a soulful musician, but everybody has their secrets

Jungkook x Reader (fluff, angst, smut next chapter)

a/n: ahhh thank you for all the requests, getting requests and feedback about my stories literally makes my life I love you all so freaking much ALSO SORRY IT TAKES ME LIKE 50 YEARS TO POST OMFG

masterlist

part 1   2   3   4   5 

“Y/n L/n IT IS 2:17AM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA--” Your mother screams, pacing in the kitchen, while your dad scowls beside her. You sit at the dinner table, numbly listening to their tirade. You’re still half asleep, and tired from earlier. 

You’d fallen asleep at Jungkook’s earlier that night, and woken up when he’d rolled over in his sleep, and flopped on top of you. In the moment it was funny, until you read the clock that glowed “2:10am” in ominous white lettering. 

“JUNGKOOK I-AGDHGDJ” You’d screamed, pushing him off and springing from the bed. He sat up, hair sticking up in all directions as you hopped around his room, desperately tugging your jeans on. 

“What?” His voice was deep and grumbly as he rubbed his eyes and tried to process the situation. His eyes finally settled on the clock, and he gasped and dashed out the door, “MEET ME IN THE CAR!!!” He screamed, scrambling for the keys. 

The two of you hit 70 in a 25, managing to get you home by 2:15, saving about 8 minutes on your usual drive time. You kissed him one more time before getting out of the car, trying to savor one last good moment before you met your bitter end. “I love you forever Y/n,” He smiles, stress evident in his tense body. 

“I love you forever too Jungkook.” You sighed, facing the house, having accepted your impending doom. The second the door had closed behind you, the lights came on and the screaming began.

By 2:45 your parents decided they had enough and sent you swiftly to bed, but not before taking your phone and sentencing you to 2 weeks of being grounded. 

You lied in bed, emotionally drained as you stared at the ceiling. But even then, you couldn’t help but smile. You really did love him. 

From: My Mans :)

Saturday, 2:30am

Y/n??

Y/n is everything okay???

Im so sorry 

I really am I didnt mean for time to get away from us like that

Ughhhhhh Y/n please dont be mad

Please dont be mad

Ok uhhhh text me tomorrow ig. I love you

Sunday, 10:11am

Y/n really Im getting worried

Pls tell me this is a prank? AHAHAh im laughing

2:45pm

I showed you my dick pls reply

Y/N 

4:41pm

goddddd

Y/n i really love youuuuu

Knock knock

Whos there?

NOT YOU APPARENTLY SJHDGSJFAHKSAHJ

6:18pm

ok so

I guess youre mad?

Annnnd idk what I did so I cant say sorry

BUT if you tell me what I did wrong I can apologize

sooooo

uGAUKHSFGHJ Y/N

See 216 More Messages?

You grin scrolling through your messages. It was 7:45am on a monday, and you’d just gotten your phone back. You’d spent the weekend without electronics, and with plenty of housework. You still had two weeks of house arrest, but you would get to see your friends at school, and keep your phone, so things were already looking up. Your parents didn’t know you lost your v-card, so they didn’t really have anything against Jungkook except for him keeping you out too late. 

To: My Mans :)

7:48- Come get meeeeee :P

Within 2 minutes of sending that text Jungkook replies, making you laugh.

From: My Mans :)

7:56- Oh my god are you kidding me I text you all day every day all weekend and this is all I get back? No heartfelt message? Am I just a rockin bod and a cool car to you? Damn, you thotties really be cold

7:57- Omw

“What the fuuuuck,” Jungkook whines pulling you in by the hips and kissing you, pressing you against him. 

��Sorry, my parents took my phone.” You grin, ruffling his hair and getting in the car. 

“God I thought I was bad in bed or something, you really did a number on my insecurity this weekend,” He grins, taking the car out of park. 

Walking through school felt different now. You felt dirty and exposed. You felt like everybody knew what you did that weekend. Walking down the halls hand in hand with Jungkook, you usually got some stares, but now it felt like all eyes were on you. Jungkook seemed fine, unbothered even. As he should of course, and as you should too. You just couldn’t shake that unsettled feeling though. 

Eventually that feeling left, and a feeling of pride took its place. You were his girl, the person he decided was worthy enough to be his first. Telling your friends really gassed you up. 

“Y/N YOU WHAT?!” Lisa was screaming. You guys were between classes and you couldn’t really think of a good time to tell them, so you figured now was as good as any. “You got dicked down? Like all the way down?!” Lisa whispered, eyes wide.  “Yeah! Do you guys hate me?” You grin nervously.

“No! Just don’t ditch us for booty calls,” Jisoo grins and nudges you. The three of you laugh while you give them details as you walk to your next class. You’re caught up in the story before somebody runs into you, jolting you from your thoughts. You look back in annoyance to see who the perpetrator was. Mark Tuan just hurries off, ignoring you. “Hey, ignore him. You’re Jeon Jungkook’s squeeze now, we have more important things to think about.” Jisoo laughs, grabbing your arm and tugging you down the hallway.

Mark

Jungkook was still a part of our group I guess. Bam and Taehyung jumped on the chance to talk to him again after things had been tense the last few weeks. Jungkook texted them and asked if we could all hang after lacrosse, so of course that meant I had to wait after school til 5 for them. 

Roaming the empty halls I scroll through instagram, trying to occupy my headspace. I really had been enjoying my guy time recently, but I can’t lie, I do miss my time with Y/n. After school hot chocolate and homework had become a fixture in my life, like she had been. It felt like there was a big empty hole where she used to be, in my house and in my head. 

“Mr. Tuan,” Mr. Atkinson’s voice rips me from  my thoughts. 

“Yes sir?” I turn, pocketing my phone.

“Wanna take a walk?” Atkinson approaches, not really giving me a choice. We both walk in silence for a minute or so, our footsteps echoing down the halls. “Have you been alright recently? You and Y/n don’t talk anymore, and you’ve fallen in with a..lesser crowd.” His voice is light, but I can hear the more serious tone beneath.

“Yeah, people just..grow apart.” I shrug, shoving my hands in my pockets.

“Yeah but you and y/n didn’t. Or at least she didn’t. I know there’s more. Now, I don’t expect you wanting to talk to your washed up teacher about your personal life, but you should talk to her. Or someone.” He’s right. I sigh, nodding. 

“What do I say?” My voice is quiet, ashamed.

“It never hurts to start with sorry.” 

You lay on your bed, scrolling through your phone on a break from homework. Your break had already taken 2 hours, oops. Suddenly a picture of Mark doing a double chin fills up your home screen while your phone buzzes, signaling a call from your old friend. It had been a hot minute since you’d gotten a call from him; it had been a hot minute since you’d gotten any kind of formality from him in general. 

“Hello?” You slowly hit the green button.

“I’m sorry Y/n. Can we talk?”

[ubereyezconfessions-blog]

2/8/19-2/9/19 Riders

#ThemToo

I dont want to assume it, But I seriously think I over heard my passengers speak on being raped. Its not a far trip at all, but i assume they were talking about it prior to getting in the car. But they get in, the first of the two ladies that are in the trip, finishes a story. But its a story of having nights were shes went out, and got blacked out drunk. Im already thrown off because Im more sober than I aint. But she continues. A story of being drunk, having to be carried on a mans shoulders cause she wanted to get into another club. Saying she woke up with bruises and her friends said she was “fighting a curb”. Even at one point of being black out, she was told that a cop approached her friend and asked if she was alright and couldnt get into clubs being that intoxicated and not being able to walk. And having to be took home and tucked in.

Now heres where things gets bizarre. The next girl begins her story. Begins with telling that shes had her experience with blacking out. But slips that she thinks she was drugged and the other girl thinks the same for herself. She runs on with a story that her friends did it to her. That they got her “fucked up”, blacked out to the point where she wasnt coherent of what was going on. To where her “friends” used her credit card and ran up a $500 dollar bill on a credit card of hers. Took her car and left her stranded, even as far as throwing her luggage out with her. Woke up with bruises and the thought that she was drugged cause couldnt remember any of it. At this point she says she at a airport and calling her parents that she had a crappy relationship with to save her. Back and fourths and being stranded without a clue of how to get out the situation. And at no expense her parents did get her out of it. Said that her “friend” was there the whole time and she knew the people they were with were sketchy but she was around them. According to her, she was drugged, beat, and I can only hope that the worst thing in mind didnt happen. But at many points on her trying to get through the airport and home, many people told her to get to hospital which she never did.

In my head, as fucked up as it is, I knew what kinda happened just with my upbringing. Basically her friend got to know her and behind her back probably hated that she probably never had a want that wasnt met. Of course sucks to assume, but these were white women that probably didnt come from homes where money was an issue. But the characters she was around more than likely did. So they probably used her for her money and the sketchy characters were probably in the other womans ear having her play the role til they could make that night happen, or even being the mastermind to it all. You dont get drugged in a house of friends without some inside job happening.. Of course thankfully shes alive and all good today. But what a story to overhear. These women were speaking on potentially being assaulted like it was a run of the mill thing.

Perhaps Im not aware of just how dark the human can be, or I just have such a respect and awareness for another human that I cant fathom hurting another or taking advantage when things can just happen if you let them fall in your lap.

Succubus

Which brings me to my next story which is a polar opposite. And that is 4 lustful women that couldnt just admit what they wanted. Which i find these cases very funny and this was actually a first that was an ego boost. So this trip takes place in Long Beach-Huntington Beach borderlines. Its some 80′s rock night so you can guess the crowd attending. All american lol. But anyways, I pull up and a group of women approach the car. This Blonde that ordered the ride and led the pack, She approached the car with this look in her eye that was filled with lust. I can only assume they dont see many young black males around those parts. (Im learning America isnt as intergrated as it preaches). So they all get in, greetings follow. And they start getting ditzy. But its a smooth ride, were Its ever so obvious the blonde is diggin me. Yet, As im learning, younger women dont express their wants or attraction while. As in my story with “The Cougar”, Im very aware that if a woman wants you, she will let you know. Lifes too short for all this thats happening in this ride. But anyways, so in the backseat are her friends, which Im assuming are the cockblocks and overseers of if their friends go home with anyone when they go out. But she kinda narrates the trip. And with this running need for a toothbrush to spend the night at her friends. Which brings up this conversation where the blonde states she has a toothbrush for her. To which we all have a laugh because it sounds rather bizarre that she just has toothbrushes to give out to guest. And then she ask me would I find it creepy if a woman had a toothbrush for me if I stayed over. Which kinda felt like a indirect way of asking me to stay over. But not being bluntly stated, no bite on my end. I tell her that yeah it could be weird but its all on context. To then this point her friend begins talking about she needs vitamin D and a facial mask of some sort. If you ask me, she meant some very sexual things. But once again, not bluntly stated - no bite. Even with the toothbrush conversation that same girl told that blonde, “dont sound like such a hoe”. Which reviewing the trip, its obvious that this is something that isnt out the normal of these chicks. Which among being a good ego boost. Kinda glad I didnt pursue anything thrown out there with any of them. Even more a nod of the right choice, the chicks went from plans on going home to another bar, which it was a little after 12am-ish then. So about a hour and change to drink before last call, or rather find someone with vitamin D and a face mask lol.

All-Americans

This is a very quick trip but a conversation on hindsight that makes me go “hmmm”. Anyways this is directly after the prior trip with the Succubus. And I pick up 3 white guys in Long Beach, like 2nd street where its nothing but bars and nightlife. Im aware of the area being at the beach with an ex near there. Which riding through, it kinda hit me that she probably spent times there for her experience of the nightlife which give her awareness of the beach there. But anyways im going to the pick up with “This Is America” playing. Obvious what that is, if youve ever watched the video or heard it. But I pick them up and its the greets. The guy that sits passenger is the only one talking. The other two or weirdly quiet or maybe offended because with the rate the first guy got in, I only got a introduction to him before they jumped in the back and it was probably a quick “whats up” or something. But anyways we hit the light to turn thats maybe 2 blocks away. So they notice a bar across the street and speak on how packed it is. Which i myself was wondering why this bar had a line to get in it when its many bars in the whole street that didnt. Part of me recognized it was a urban crowd, but it slipped out my mouth that I didnt understand why people wait that long to get in a bar. Which its approaching 12:30am and some of them wouldnt get in til 1am and then it leaves 30 minutes for that. Which the passengers say, “not worth it, right?”. To which I agree. Hindsight i feel he meant its dumb of urban folks to go to bars and wait around for that we just saw. So then he starts asking me am I from the area and i tell him Im from LA. Then he ask where in LA do i visit, bar wise. To which i tell him I just spend my time at home and working that job. To which he calls me a Iron Introvert and then he ask me this really urking question when I look back. “Do you read?”. I chuckled but in my mind im thinking, who the hell doesnt read. Or perhaps he wasnt used to people like me reading. To which he goes in on if ive ever heard of David Goggins. to which he calls a introvert that does crazy shit. amongst the accolades he preaches he tells me about his book. and I ask him whats it about. So he tells me about his growing up and he started with “he grew up in indiana and he was the only...”. Didnt finish the sentence, which i knew exactly what he was gonna say but I was gonna let him say it. So he explains first that his dad had a roller rink and was the first black man to start a business there or thriving business i suppose. Which he abused his son with a lot of beatings. But he becomes who he is and is the only black in the vicinity or that he spoke on. The guy was fascinated by him but kinda was a obvious observations that they dont run into many black folk in that side of the city. And dont truly understand the us, but what they read and see.

[scaredlonelymoon-blog]

5.

Man, today was both fucked up and amazing at the same time. Let me explain.

So this morning I had an appointment at the dermatologist at 7:30am in the fucking morning. Yesterday was a good day for me, I was able to get some good sleep and was able to function more so like a normal human being for most of the day. I think it was mainly because I had only fruit the day beforehand. Anyway, this morning a few hours before the appointment I had woken up in the worst way possible. My vaseline which is used for moisturizing my skin went flying off my bed to the opposite end of the room, I woke up itchy as fuck, and was just fucking pissed off knowing I was on the right track of normal sleep and it just went to fuck all. After talking to myself and questioning why life chose me as its torturing puppet, I decided to go back to sleep. My armpits wouldnt stop sweating but it wasn’t much to stop me from sleeping. I slept for about a few minutes, only to wake up to the common raging burning sensation on my whole upper body. Now I’m really fucking angry and mentally drained. This whole kept me up till my appointment came, and I was just out of my fucking mind by the time my dad came home, leaving work early just to go with me to the dermatologist. It was really hard on me to get ready and get out in the cold, pitch black morning, while being in excruciating pain. The appointment was... interesting. I honestly never wanted to go in the first place, I only did it to shut my mom up when she was trying to force my dad to bring me to the hospital while having a breakdown. The doctor was nice, and caring in his own way... but prescribed me a steroid immunosuppresant just like every single doctor before him. When I realized what he had prescribed me, I was just so disappointed and even more angry that I didn’t know what to do anymore. I told my dad I wanted jugo juice, and so went to the place 20 mins before they had even opened... got my jugo juice with a salad roll with sweet chili sauce and was on our way back home. On our way back home, we found out that the rexall near our house got torn down which was sort of a surprise, but knowing the business there... it was kinda expected. My dad dropped me off home because I needed to use the toilet. He went off to shoppers drug mart to buy me the medicine the doctor had prescribed. When I got home, I did my business in the toilet and actually pooped out a ton of blood... now THIS got me fucking mentally crazy because nothing just ever fucking stopped giving me shit and the morning hadn't even passed yet. I ran to my room as my mom annoyed me about things I really didn’t care about at the moment (humidifier problems)... and just wanted to fucking sleep the rest of the day until later on in the day when we were supposed to eat and go out as a family (which I was very excited for). As I lay there on my bed, my dad finally gets home after about 30 mins and comes to my room. He tries to force the steroid onto me and starts getting real upset as I reject him constantly, I kept telling him I was sorry because I was scared of the medication. I know the side effects and what it can do to my body if things went south... the medication most likely isnt even used to treat my actual symptoms (fluid retention or lymphedema) and could actually make it worst. As my dad kept getting more upset, I started feeling even more terrible because my dad has been putting up with my shit that whole morning and the whole week basically just taking care of me and going out of his way for me. Just that morning he got off work early just to go with me to the derma, bought me breakfast, getting my meds, and taking care of me at home... It was at this point that I snapped, for real. I went on a raging rampage and starting yelling at slamming my pillow, eventually punching another god damn hole in my room. My mom then came in crying and it was just a whole fucking mess. Mom kept pressuring me to take the medicine or else she’d quit her job just to take care of me... and my dad just sat there comforting me as I kept crying my fucking ass off. Anyway, time pass, I was able to get SOME sleep, its about the evening now. It’s time to eat with the family and get some food. Before hand I had some pineapple, love me some pineapples and went out with my dad to go buy food at millwoods. First trip, tokyo express.. sadly I cant eat anything from there or any asian place generally because all those resturants use is soy sauce (yeast allergy). After, we went to prime time donair where I got a chicken donair rice platter with small fries and garlic sauce on the side. I wanted the beef kebab but sadly they didnt have it -_-. Got home, and ate with the family, it was fucking nice. Seeing and being with my family at a round table for 4, just talking and having a good chat.. its what I wanted.My meal was decent enough, not enough sauce... the same goes for the rest of my families rice bowls XD. Then after I had another bowl movement, no blood thankfully! And we were on our way to the cinema to watch Bad Moms Christmas! It was decent, had some real funny parts but overall it was a half decent movie. What mattered more to me was just being there with my whole family and experiencing it all together. The popcorn was bland though, no matter how much butter I put on it... To be honest I wish I couldve enjoyed the moment more, I was pretty occupied with my slight indigestion with the popcorn not going down my esophagus...but other than that yeah.. it was fun. When we got home, it was kind of sad... it basically spelt the end of a whole family experience... and of course the coming of inevitable painful episode awaiting me. But the last thing I needed to do was to thank my dad for everything... and I did. Before he was set off to go to work to his 2nd job (jesus christ this guy never has a break)... I walked up to him , arms wide open and gave him a hug.. thanking him for everything he had done today. Nothing was possible without him and I love him so much for it. Anyway, that was my day more or less and I dont know how much left I have in me to keep going. I’m still suicidal but I love my parents so much... I dont know... we’ll see.

[loveandra0314-blog]

Tweets!

All my tweets since August 29th, 2016

Currently renewing my unhealthy obsession with Harry Styles. Seniors- have a fun year knowing that all the people older than you in school get to sleep in on Mondays If it comes in rose gold, I own it Lol @ seniors who think they're the shit All of my stories start with "well first of all, bitch" I love myself. Thought you ought to know. When your roommate is THE SAME DISNEY PRINCESS AS YOU My mom keeps sending me pictures of her food Still in summer mode Drew some nice pics of myself getting electrocuted in math today I can literally find someone on the Internet in .002 secs with just a first name, but tell me to hand in my assignment online and I'll die LOOK AT THE LITTLE HEART #GreysAnatomy GREYS FOOTBALL AND HOW TO GET AWAY WITH MURDER TONIGHT IS THE NIGHT If you live tweet next weeks Criminal Minds season premiere, I'll report you for emotional abuse I have not lost my voice, my voice just doesn't like me so she moved out. I send my parents paragraphs and hundreds of pictures of school and I am repaid with one word sentences and blurry pictures of my dog. I come home to find that my parents literally did everything they could to conceal everything that has anything to do with me in my room ALSO MY BATHROOM SMELLS LIKE CLEANING FLUID AND I KNOW DAMN WELL IT SMELLED LIKE "sweet peony" WHEN I LEFT Anthony's favorite hobby is absolutely roasting people on the Hudl app MUZZ WAS SO EXCITED TO SEE ANTHONY THAT HE PEED ON THE COUCH On a scale from 1-10 of brokenness, I'm a $34.72. I'm really proud of myself because I finished 1/8 of an essay that's due on Thursday #overachiever Btw, Anthony replied to my hint with pictures of his papa I know it's the law... But could the train maybe not blow the whistle 6 times through a campus of sleep deprived college kids????? Spagetting to know you Julia and I are in bed watching a movie and wondering why it's so loud... ITS 8:00 PM But how the f is it October in like 2 days We're over here acting like its the damn ice age I've been coughing all over everyone and everything and IM A TERRIBLE ROOMMATE IM SO SORRY WTF "5 Crazy" I love you, SVU Women before us fought to have the right to vote - don't take that for granted #VOTE My bed is absolutely COVERED in pillows, blankets, wires, school supplies, clothes and Tide pods etc… This woman started vaping and then another woman told her to stop, and now they are full on screaming at each other. ON THE COMMUTER RAIL. Guys, this clown thing is REAL I'm having a hard enough time sleeping without all these inconsiderately loud people outside my building clown hunting The dangerous part about college is going back to your bed in between classes WORDS LITERALLY CANT DESCRIBE HOW EXCITED I AM FOR BEAUTY AND THE BEAST. Belle is my Disney princess and Emma Watson is my all time favorite actress I'm crying Constantly waiting for the 12th of each month so I can have some data You can now get a life sentence for animal abuse. Justice. When your roommates make fun of you for complimenting an absolute FIRE selfie of yourself <<<< SUNDAY SHOPPING SPREE I fcking love candy corn You don't understand... our school and social lives have to fit around the voice and grey's. Sometimes my hand slips and I accidentally share something to my Facebook page We're gonna miss you #ThanksPapi It would be fun to me Harley Quinn for Halloween, but I refuse to be one of "those girls" Never be afraid to be yourself!! Happy National Coming Out Day everyone Julia and I have been watching Netflix in bed for 5 hours. COME BE OUR FRIENDS OMG Tmlt I fcking love Evan Peters and AHS Netflix for dayyyyyyzzzz May god bless you and may your eyebrows be forever on point Dear very high people in the hall, please talk even louder! And continue to walk around in your underwear! Please! I'm DYING. As soon as josh got home he immediately told everyone not to ask any questions about the dance My baby brother is almost 14 and he's like a foot taller than me and his voice is deeper than my dad's My little brother got a 30 yrd touchdown and 40 yrd run Mo and Julia are asleep and I'm just laying here laughing my ass off Literally the worst thing in the world is realizing you have a hole in your leggings Backless dresses are just so incredibly beautiful I love them The girls are asleep and I am laughing like a fcking psycho. What's new? Sorry that I retweet a lot, I just feel like sharing the things I find awesome or funny are worth making your day too I love reconnecting I have heart failure walking to class when I start to hear a longboarder behind me Cookies and Gilmore Girls with my babes It's 11:00 and we're trying to sleep pls enforce quiet hour or I will Julia and I suck at life so we put it on the internet. #relatable "Omg have you seen @JeffreeStar new black highlighter?" "Isn't that just a sharpie?" NO JULIA IT IS NOT A SHARPIE I love late night phone calls with my man Rewatching greys is my fave thing to do Meeting guy friends at college is easy until you bring up your boyfriend I told everyone in my kindergarten class that I was a boy. So, surprise everyone idk what that was about Life update: the heater in our room is making loud, evil noises. This started yesterday and has not stopped. This heater needs medical attention I am honestly concerned for this heater's health. She's clearly leaking or dying or something College is not being able to afford a stapler and the professor refusing to collect unstapled papers. Derek Shepherd has been setting unrealistic expectations since 2005. Feliz Dia de Los Muertes! I'm so excited for Beauty and the Beast I'm actually crying. Real tears. I'm seeing it MINIMUM 10 times in theaters "THIS MEAT IS SO RAW A GOOD VET COULD SAVE IT" Anthony wutttttttt No Makeup November JULIA AND I ARE CRYING (not happy tears) The sun rose this morning and it will rise tomorrow morning My dad has had a variation of the same car since 1995 "You are SO loud" "I just don't care" lol k Anthony Scooby doo I cried twice today, first because I watched the Beauty and the Beast trailer, the second time was when I re-watched the trailer. My dream job is when it's always Friday Also no makeup November is going swimmingly, I may never wear makeup everyday ever again All the bathrooms on my floor are being cleaned and I've been holding my pee for an hour and a half. Can I be someone's creepy older prom date this year? I had some real good coffee this morning and I feel absolutely fantastic, this may be a new me Anthony is snapchatting me live from his room where his roommate is keeping him captive and asking deep questions about life College is being awake at 11pm which is just enough time to squeeze in a few more episodes of greys before 12 COLLEGE IS BEING AWAKE AT 12:30am BUT THERES ONLY ONE MORE EPISODE IN THE SEASON Hobbies include: coughing loudly and rudely when I pass people who are smoking When I'm actively trying to not laugh my ass off at stupid stuff because roommate Just a reminder to be careful and safe this holiday season I want a pretty case because the life proof one is too much but I can't afford a new phone sooo.... TMI: I threw up all over a bathroom stall today. I warned you. My professor shaded me in front of the whole class. I don't have room for embarrassment because I high key gained so much respect. Savagery Hahaha at least my eyebrows are fleeky The weather today is less than ideal. Julia made a tinder and then promptly deleted it when she saw an attractive man. THIS IS WHY. THIS IS WHY. True friends snapchat from across the room If the wifi would stay connected, I wouldn't run out of data every month The temperature was in the single digits today and I honestly don't know how I've ever been able to live like this for so long There is a full on absolutely raging party down the hall from my room. 24 hour quiet hours what College made me addicted to tums Sleep is great, but have you ever watched Netflix? Prof almost made us stay past the two hours like... fuck you thought?? Oh annnnnnd I woke my ass up at 7:00 this morning to get a waffle AND THEY HADNT PUT THE STATION OUT YET Why does my brother constantly ask what we got him for xmas?? Like we're not telling you and if we did your xmas would be ruined Trying to save up...but Sephora I can't even put into words how sad I am about Carrie Fishers passing. Rest In Peace. Someone get me on the slopes Can't stop won't stop crying at the Beauty and the Beast trailer. What did I do to deserve this Every time I lose a snapchat streak, I die a little on the inside I'm such a daddy's girl tbh Setting that 4 am alarm is absolutely killer Hey at least the Cubs won the World Series in 2016 Thought about making a resolution to go to the gym and eat green stuff, but I'm just gonna do me, eat cookies and walk occasionally Tmlt- moral: be happy, and do what makes you happy I really just slept until 5pm Traveling through Hoth in my damn Jetta was fun I should have just skied home from work smh These are the days that I wish my dad's Outback was automatic. Smh I share a bathroom w two teenage boys. There is a pile of underwear in the corner that grows +2 every day.