#it's technically late for the main prompt this was written for

[golbrocklovely]

cultish love // colby brock

A/N: first off, so sorry for this being so late, i had a lot of things i had to edit about this fic. also this is my longest fic ever ! like the other fic before this, this is a AU version of colby… where he, you guessed it, is a cult leader. and he is also corrupt (but like aren't all cult leaders). again this deals with some possible heavy themes, so give a good read of the trigger warnings before reading ahead. i've always joked about colby being able to lead a cult, and that's basically where this idea came from. this fic also took a turn i wasn't expecting, but i like it anyway. also the first half is written as a journal entry (all italized) and then the rest is an actual fic (not italized). lmk what you think, and happy haunting !

prompt: you're a journalist, and your next big story is on the 'empathic love' cult, led by none other than colby brock. this cult is not known well, but you are getting a first hand look at them and what they do. and quickly, colby takes a liking to you. || fem!reader x AU!cult leader!colby brock

trigger warning: SMUT, no actual sex but you do get mentally fucked (it will make sense in the story), cult vibes all around, love bombing, cursing, supernatural powers, colby is very intense and kinda scary but also still his charming self, slight dubcon similar in vain to sam's story - you never say no outright, but you do have general feelings of 'wtf is this, idk if i like' so if that's too much for you, feel free to read something else :), colby's aura is crazy good at giving you visions, strangers-to-soulmates?? don't know if that's a tag lol, also…. colby's technically bisexual in this????? but like barely

word count: 8610

I've been a reporter for only five years, and this story.... it could make or break my career. Cults aren't as prevalent as they once were way back when. They still exist, just in the shadows. A lot quieter on most fronts. Usually disguised as a business or religion, for tax reasons of course. But this cult, Empathic Love, is unlike any cult I've heard of.

Of course, they don't call themselves a cult, but that's what they are. How else would you describe a bunch of randos following one man around wherever he goes?

They only started so many years ago, right before I graduated university. The main founder, Colby Brock, is a pragmatic individual, according to his followers. The cult began blowing up in my town a little over two years ago, and now people flock from all over the world to visit the Love Compound. You would think it's Disney World the way people grow excited about it.

But I am here to get to the truth of this cult. What is their motive? What are they planning to do? Will this be another Waco or Heaven's Gate? What sinister beliefs hide underneath the modern-day hippie aesthetic they show?

These notes will document everything I experience for the next couple of days. And in case I go missing, these are my proof of who's to blame.

I don't think it will go that far, but you can never be too sure.

~~~~

Day 1 - Investigation

I'm still incredibly surprised I was allowed to come onto the Love Compound. The leader himself apparently reached out to my boss and told them that they wanted someone to come down and interview the group. They allow visitors from time to time, "new recruits" as some of the townspeople call them, but reporters have never been allowed in. Not once. Until me.

Driving up to the compound was nerve-wracking. I never imagined I would be nervous; I've interviewed plenty of criminals in my years, have done full blown investigations into scary, horrifying crimes. But something about this place freaked me out. Partially because I didn't know what I was getting into. But another part of me, and I will never admit this out loud, felt... at home.

The only promise I made to myself was I wouldn’t drink any kool-aid while there. So, I plan to stick to that. Pretend my previous statement never existed.

I was greeted by a beautiful woman when I got there: Avery. No one went by last names. And some apparently changed their names altogether, which was not surprising. My guess is there were most likely criminals hanging out amongst the group. But I had no proof of that, just a hunch. It easily could be a safe haven for those wanting to escape whatever life they had before.

The compound was three Victorian style mansions connected to each other and had a decent size farm attached - about 222 acres. Avery told me about all of the vegetables and chickens they farmed. Everything was organic and used up as often as possible. Anything that couldn't be eaten or produced too much for the only 100ish people in the compound, was sold at the farmer's market or given away to the local food bank. Avery explained to me very clearly that everyone in the compound chipped in one way or another. Some still worked normal jobs, but just lived here with everyone. But she noted that Colby hoped in the near future no one would have to work at all and they would be self-sufficient in a couple years.

A cult with future plans? Almost unheard of.

I told Avery that I was given an all-access pass to ask anything I wanted to, and nothing I asked could be ignored or deflected. She agreed to an interview. I recorded all of it, but here are the highlights of what I gathered.

I asked her why Colby was such a secretive man. There were very few photos of him that did exist out there, but all that was rumored about him was his alluring eyes and generally attractive presence. She agreed that he was handsome, describing his as having "ocean blue eyes" and his voice was to die for. "Deep and arousing", as she explained.

I noted that she seemed almost lost in thought at the idea of him, like she was envisioning him directly in front of her. Strange behavior; but not for a cult follower. Many end up falling in love with their leader, believing they have a genuine relationship with said person.

I bought up the name of the group, Empathic Love, and said it felt a little too inviting. She laughed and told me that it was right on the money - the best way to describe why everyone was there. She expressed to me that so many of Colby's followers wanted peace and love and light, and that being in this group felt like that. It was rewarding to be surrounded by those that cared and wanted to see each other succeed. Life outside the walls of the compound was rough, scary, draining; but inside, it was all love.

Call me cynical, but I don't believe that for a second. It took all the strength I had to keep from rolling my eyes at her. But I could tell from her voice, her motions... she was telling the truth. Well, her truth.

I wanted to know what brought her here, so she spoke of her previous life. She was abused growing up, moved around a lot in foster care. She was almost homeless, and then one day she ran into Colby. He had just begun the Empathic Love group, and she just knew she had to stick with him. Her life immediately turned around the moment he was in her life. The adoration in her eyes told me a different story, so I pressed her - "are you and Colby... together?" She smiled and said no, but she knew that they were life partners before, just not currently.

Oh... so it's one of those types of cults.

She said that Colby doesn't have a second in command, wife, girlfriend, whatever. Everyone is equal and heard. He's just the face of the group, which is a bit ironic given even I have no clue what he looks like. I knew he was young, in his mid-20s. But other than that, no idea.

I needed to know, why stay? What keeps you here? A dreamy look came over her, like she had said this a million times before: "Colby. He is love, and that's all anyone could ask for."

Chills ran up my spine at the tone of her voice. It was dull, and her words sounded like a mantra, the way she said them so easily.

I wrapped up my interview with her, quiring if I was allowed to interview others. She said yes and began sending over random people one-by-one to me.

If I hadn't gotten chills from her first, I would have from everyone else. Something about seeing everyone saying similar things, smiling happily, like the ship isn't sinking around them was eerie. It made my stomach churn when I would ask questions I already asked Avery, and get almost the same speech back.

I interviewed about 15 people. All variety of ages and genders. I suddenly realized that there were no children around, and everyone was over the age of 21.

Consenting adults… minus the supposed brainwashing.

A couple of the interviewees stuck out to me:

Penelope, 25. Her upbringing was similar to Avery's, but she still kept in contact with her family. Apparently, she wasn't the only one like that either. Many still kept in touch and even visited their loved ones. I asked her to describe Colby, tell me anything about him. She giggled, almost like a schoolgirl, and began to weave such a story about him. He was kind and caring. His smile was contagious, just like his laugh. And his singing voice was fantastic. She talked about him like he was a boy band member, and she was his biggest fan. I asked her to give one word to describe him, and she said "Love. He is love, and that's all anyone could ask for."

Greg, 36. He had fallen into rough times, and desired a fresh start. He had heard about this group online, and figured checking them out while he was in town wouldn't hurt. And that was a couple years ago. I wondered why he didn't feel weird listening to someone that was younger than him, and he shrugged. It was nice not having eyes on him. He loved being in a wallflower, and he believed that Colby deserved all the love he got from everyone in the group. Every ounce he got was ten-folded back into the group. Greg had never felt so connected to a group of people and he knew it was all thanks to Colby. "He brought love into my life like I never have had it before. Because that's who he is: love."

Heather, 29. She mentioned how for most of her life she felt like shit. Her confidence was at an all-time low when she met Colby. He encouraged her to keep at it, to love herself and find happiness everywhere. And by spending more and more time with him, she did. She has never felt more confident about herself, her life, her direction, and Colby is the reason for that. The tone that took over her voice when she bought him up was odd. It was very similar to a partner describing the love of their life, almost like wedding vows. I asked her haphazardly about her love life, how that was going for her. And she told me she had been on many dates - something she never used to do back when she was younger or before Colby. But she did note that regardless of who she ends up with, she knows that a part of her heart will always belong to Colby. They were connected, forever. "Love and light and happiness is what I desired, and I got it - all because Colby exists in my life now."

It felt like I was getting nowhere with some of these interviews. Many said the same thing, Colby being love and light and blah blah blah. I wanted someone that wasn't gonna just quote to me whatever mantra he made them learn. And luck was on my side, because I was able to interview their newest member, Ash. They were 23, and very beautiful. There was an almost smugness about them, like they knew they were the shiny new toy on the block. The confidence only a young 20-something year old could have.

I asked them, point blank, about Colby. Be brutally honest. They told me he was hot, and that's what drew them to him. They liked the idea of living in a group setting, especially since they grew up with many brothers and sisters. They liked helping out, and they liked knowing that Colby was keeping an eye on them the most recently. I then followed up with how long it took for them to join the group. "Three days. That's how long it takes for everyone."

I questioned them about the "Colby is love" thing, and they agreed it was a bit strange, but they couldn't help but feel the same way as everyone else. They were like a moth to a flame when it came to him. Everything about him was hypnotizing, entrancing. It was like staring at the sun; even though you knew to look away, you just couldn't help it.

Then I had to know: were they sleeping with him? Most of these cults feed off of the leader fucking every person they wanted to and leaving other members high and dry. But for some reason, it felt as if Colby was sleeping with everyone with the way they all talked about him. Ash dissented, saying no one was sleeping with him. He didn't sleep with any of his followers. But they all shared a deep, sensual mental connection with him. They felt like, sometimes, he was in their soul. And that sensation alone was euphoric, bordering on orgasmic. They also knew that in another life, they would have been together, similar to what Avery said.

It was then I knew that this group was clinically insane, or just really infatuated by what Colby was selling. It had to have been some crazy brainwashing. But it was odd; people were allowed to leave, to see loved ones, to have lives outside of the compound walls. Hell, some had dating lives that included those not here! That's unheard of, and completely stupid on Colby's part if he wants to keep things going.

A cult leader that wanted to watch his world implode.... I had to meet him. I had to meet the myth that was Colby Brock. And tomorrow I get my chance to.

~~~~

Day 2 - Interview with Colby

I feel the need to explain that these are my notes, not really meant for anyone else to see. And really, the only reason anyone would be seeing this is if I disappear or got murdered.

So, I say all of that just so I know, for myself, that this is a safe space for me to express my truest emotions and thoughts after interviewing Colby.

And all I can say, honestly, is that... I get it. I understand it now.

I felt my nerves hit their break last night before going to sleep, unable to stop my mind reeling from what was to come. I ended up bringing along a bodyguard, or really a photographer. I had known Trey since I started working as a journalist, and I knew I could rely on him to get us out of the Empathic Love compound if anything went south. I wasn't sure what I was up against when I went to interview Colby, but God... I didn't think I was so underprepared.

I met him in his office, Avery walked me over to it. It was up in the attic of the third house. It overlooked the entire property with wide windows. For an attic, I expected it to feel dark and dusty, but surprisingly it was light and airy. Almost like being out in the woods and taking a deep breath.

Colby was sitting in his main office chair. He spun around to see us, a light smile on his face. I'll be honest - I was taken aback by his beauty. I understood Ash's whole spiel about him being attractive and looking at him was like looking at the sun. It was intense. He was intense. His blue eyes bore into me, almost like they could see through me. I felt chills, but they weren't of fear. It was out of... excitement, of awe.

He greeted me, giving me a warm handshake. I hate to admit that I almost blushed at the sound of him saying my name. I had to take a couple deep breaths before starting. Avery left the room, and Trey sat outside the door, in case of backup.

I recorded our interview, knowing that I couldn't keep track of everything he said. But listening back to it now, his voice.... it's like a song. A beautiful, spellbinding song. I could almost fall asleep to it....

I asked him about his life, and how he came to be a leader for a group like Empathic Love. He spoke of his upbringing lightly, barely scraping the surface. He talked about growing up pretty normally, having a loving family, a great friend group, and then one day realizing that he could make a change in the world. That many people loved him and loved being around him. And that's when he knew that if he could make their lives better, he would. So, he started Empathic Love. Originally, it was just gonna be a safehouse for those that needed it. But then more and more people joined and suddenly, it grew into what it was today.

I asked where his family was now. "In Kansas," he told me. He said nothing further than that.

He humbly spoke of all the love he received from his followers, or his "friends" as he put it. They all cared about him in a way that he only wished he could return tenfold. I questioned him about the whole "Colby is love" thing. "How come everyone says almost the exact same thing, like they've been brainwashed into saying it?" He didn't even trip over his words as he spoke matter-of-factly to me. "I didn't come up with that phrase, they did. You would have to ask them. I take it as the highest form of a compliment, truly. I'll be honest, it's a bit embarrassing at times when they call me that, but I can't help what they do. I appreciate their love, nonetheless."

I continued asking him about different topics, until finally reaching the one I was most intrigued about. "How many of your followers - excuse me - friends, have you slept with?" He smirked, smirked, at me and said "None. Did any of them tell you that we slept together?"

"No, but the way they talk about you like the sun shines out of your ass does seem a bit odd, don't you think?"

He looked unphased. God, he had an answer for everything. "I'll be honest with you, some of my friends might be in love with me. But I make it abundantly clear that while I love them, and love their love, I don't have feelings for them. I'm still looking for the one."

I remember holding back a glare, "So, you're celibate?"

"Now, I never said that." He let out a chuckle, then his eyes darkened. "Why do you care so much about my sex life? Unless of course, you want to join it."

I tried ignoring his gaze and his words but stuttered through my next question. “Then who exactly is the right one for you, if it's not one of your followers or friends?”

It took him a while to answer, he even closed his eyes for a bit. He sat up once he knew, sauntering over to his window that overlooked it all. "I imagine the one for me is someone that will bring peace to me and my life. Someone that for all my faults, can see who I am truly deep down. She will love me, and I will worship her. I will show her what true love feels like. Our souls will be one, because they always have been."

Something strange came over me. I don't know why I said it, but I uttered, "What about looks?"

Who cares about looks! Why did I ask about looks? I was a serious journalist, not a reporter for Star Magazine!

He looked over his shoulder at me, "Looks aren't that important to me. What matters is mind and soul. Who you are deep down. But if I had to pick… someone like you. I feel someone like you would be a perfect fit around here."

I wanted to give him the sassiest voice and rebuttal I could muster, but deep down I was shaking. Energy raced through my body, like I had been electrified.

He kept his back to me, staring out the window. “I'm not trying to be overly complimentary. I'm just being honest. But I can tell that you would do so well to have us around. To have... me, in your life. I bring a lot of love to people's lives, that's for sure. But I also bring a lot of drive, and passion, and intimacy.”

Intimacy?

“People open up when I'm around. They tell me everything, even things they never dreamt of telling another person. And I allow it, because clearly, they needed to express it. And once they do, it's like the floodgates open. Love and light just start pouring into them, into their life, and it's overwhelming - but so worth it. Doesn't that sound nice?”

I guess so...

“I bring happiness to so many. My friends have told me that they get jittery around me, I'm like a shot of adrenaline. And that energy, that power, courses through them. And when it gets expressed, it comes out in…” He took a long pause, turning back to me. The look in his eyes… I can remember it as if he was still in front of me. “Pleasurable ways.”

I hate admitting this, and it's embarrassing to say it even now, but I felt a jolt of... something, run through me. I won't even say what it was out loud, in fear of never being taken seriously again. But what happened after that, I don't know if words can even express it well.

Colby continued talking, but I couldn't pick up on any of it. He was talking up a storm, but I couldn't help the sensations I was feeling. Even in my wildest of fantasies, I've never felt anything in reality. It was all in my mind. But in that very moment, it felt like it was happening to me.

I felt lips tread up my neck, stopping just below my ear. A hot, low moan breathed into my ear. My spine tingled at the sound, my hands gripping the armrests of the chair. If I didn't know any better, I would think Colby was behind me, making those noises. My hands suddenly felt hands on top of them. My eyes widened, looking down, but nothing was there. I couldn't really move my arms once the invisible hands were there. My whole body felt numb and heavy, relaxed. My mind was the one on edge, worried as to why I was feeling all of this.

I hadn't eaten or drank anything at the compound. Maybe it was being poured into the room by the vents? I don't know, but something was making me feel this way.

The invisible hands drifted up my arms, massaging my shoulders for a moment. My head lulled back, almost hitting the back of the chair. My mind was on high alert, but my body was about ready to fall asleep. The hands relaxed me so much that my eyes began to flutter.

But then... they drifted down my torso. They traced along my neck gently, drawing small, insignificant patterns. The hands grew lower and lower until they finally were on my chest. I felt the hands cup my breasts softly, my breath hitching in my throat. They kneaded my tits gingerly, my nipples hardening in my bra. I bit my lip, praying that I wouldn't make a sound. It was hard not to, especially when the delicate fingers of these invisible hands found my nipples, gently pinching them.

I remember closing my eyes tight. Trying to clear my mind. This wasn't actually happening to me. There was no way. This was a psychosis or a drug hallucination that was happening to me and Colby was doing nothing about it.

One hand drifted down my body, stopping right above my sex. I suddenly became very aware at how wet I was, my eyes widening. I felt a rush of blood flow through my cheeks. I was about to get caught. These invisible hands made me wet, and I couldn't stop them.

And the terrible thing was, I didn't want them to. I wanted them to finish the job. To get me off... in front of Colby. One hand rose back up my body, grabbing my neck and turning my face to look up at him.

A deep voice whispered harshly, "You want him, don't you?"

I didn't say anything, afraid of what would come out. But deep down, I knew.

"Say it, and it's yours. Say you want him. And he'll have you... forever."

I opened my mouth. I felt the words almost leave my lips. I stuttered out something. I closed my eyes, my body feeling high.

And then in a split second, it was all gone. The room grew quiet, and Colby cleared his throat. "Y/N, are you okay? You look flush."

I jolted out of my seat, being able to move freely again. I looked around and realized Colby was sitting once more, staring at me concerned. I finished the interview abruptly, saying I had everything I needed - even though I definitely didn't. And then he uttered words I wish I didn't hear.

"If you want, come back tomorrow. We are having a celebration here. I would love if you came by, even if for an hour."

I nodded, not even really taking in what he said, and left. Trey was confused as to why I bum-rushed out of the room, but I never told him the truth. How could I?

I knew deep down I shouldn't have said yes to go to the party. But getting that footage would be killer for my article. Interviews are great, but a party at a cult compound? That's bound to end terribly (for Colby, but great for me).

But something in me can't shake this feeling that I basically signed myself up for the end. End of what? I'm not sure. But I'll find out tomorrow.

~~~~~~

Stepping back onto the compound made my heart race. I was nervous as all hell, and just wanted this day to be over with already. Today was my last day doing this story. I was counting the minutes to when I could go back to my office and write about how this place was insane, or whatever narrative I planned to write.

I had enough proof that something was up here. All I needed to do was a bit more digging. And during the party is when I planned to do it.

Avery walked up to me, smiling brightly. "Hey, Y/N! How are you doing today?"

"I'm okay. I know it's a bit early, but Colby never specified when the party was going to take place." I replied.

"No, you're totally fine. The party is gonna happen later. Right now, though, we have something going on that you'll definitely want to see." She clapped excitedly.

"Oh? And what is that?" I questioned.

"We are inducting a new member!" she exclaimed giddily. "There's a whole process that we do, and everyone is involved. I imagine that will bode well for your article if you see it firsthand. It's all taking place in that tent."

I stared over at the huge tent, its plastic cover doors strangely inviting.

I hummed, "Sure, I'll be there in a moment."

Avery nodded, turning on her heels and prancing over to the tent, following in other members.

"What's happening in there?" Trey asked.

"Apparently they are inducting someone new into their cult." I informed him.

He blinked. "Group, you mean."

I rolled my eyes, "Yeah, whatever. Make sure to capture as much as you can."

He shook his camera, giving me a wink, "On it."

We both walked in, many members still up and around, giving everyone hugs and chatting. Avery waved me down, patting the seat next to her. I walked over and sat. My body tingled in anticipation. I wasn't sure what was going to happen. My breathing picked up as everyone grew silent, the doors opening. Colby walked in, and people rushed to their seats.

Colby called out, "Hello everyone, good morning."

"Good morning, Colby." Everyone said in unison.

Jesus, that was creepy.

"A lot of things are going to be different today. First, we have guests watching our festivities. Y/N and Trey. Everyone, give them a hand." He gestured to the two of us.

The tent exploded in applause, Avery evening rubbing my back sweetly. It felt like I was being congratulated on something I didn't achieve, my cheeks flushing at the acknowledgement.

"And secondly, sadly, the new member we were going to have decided not to stay." He frowned, his face dropping.

Members gasped, some audible "oh no" echoed around the tent. Colby nodded his head sympathetically. “I know, but fret not. I think this will be a learning experiment for our new guests. We can still do our traditional motions of having someone join us. But, imagine it as if it's a mock ceremony instead. Ms. Y/N, would you please step up here?”

My heart stopped when he looked into my eyes, the first time since yesterday. I glanced at Avery, who grinned enthusiastically. She pushed me out of my seat, my body following her lead. I gazed around, finding Trey, who pulled away from his camera with a concerned look. I stumbled up the walkway, stepping on stage with Colby.

Colby lowered his voice so I could only hear him, moving away from the microphone. "I know you wanted to know about how we induct someone into our little home, so I figured why not use you as an example? We aren't actually inducting you, in case you’re worried. This is just what would happen if you were joining. Are you okay with that?"

I gazed around the huge, white tent, making eye contact with many people in the audience. They all looked so eager, waiting to hear my response. Some were even shaking with excitement.

I stuttered, feeling Colby squeeze my hands to bring my attention back to him, "I-I guess so."

"Fantastic." He turned, still holding one of my hands, "Alright everyone, you know the drill."

The crowd cheered, suddenly many lining up to a microphone at the side of the stage. Colby lightly pulled me to a cushioned throne, sitting me down. "So here's what's going to happen. People are going to come up to that microphone, and they are going to give you plenty of love. Genuine love. And then the next person will go, and so on until everyone has spoken."

"Everyone here? Like, all hundred plus of you?" I whispered.

"Yes. It's gonna be a while, so get cozy." He laughed, rubbing my shoulders.

Time felt frozen as slowly everyone came up and said something nice about me. Some were quick, mostly just commenting on how nicely I dressed or how the stories I had covered in the past were interesting and thoughtful. But others, it's like they could see into my soul and point out the exact thing I was insecure about. Everyone was complimentary and it was nice, but exhausting.

The line had dwindled down, and the next person to speak was Avery.

She stepped up the microphone, giving me a huge smile. "Hi, Y/N. I know we don't know each other that well, but I feel like I've known you my whole life. These couple days of getting to know you, being interviewed by you, have just been the highlight of my life. You are such a lovely presence to be around, and you deserve all the success you've gotten these last couple years."

Lots of people in the crowd nodded, agreeing with Avery. She continued, taking a deep breath, "I wanted to add - you are so deserving of love. You are easy to love too, and I hope that you are surrounded by people that make you feel that way. I know that this is just a mock ceremony, but I truly believe you would be such a great addition to us. I know you don't trust us, but I hope that soon you will find that you have a safe place here. Even if you never come back here again. This is your home now, and forever will be."

My chest heaved suddenly, tears welling up in my eyes. What the fuck is happening right now? Why was I crying at what she said? Sure, it was sweet and kind, but... how did she know I needed to hear that?

I turned my head, wiping the tears before anyone could see them fall. The crowd clapped as Avery left, going back to her seat.

The last couple people were a blur, my mind still hanging onto Avery's words. Suddenly, a hand was placed on my shoulder, jolting me out of my thoughts. I gazed up, seeing Colby's beautiful face staring down at me.

"The ceremony is done. Now, time to party."

~~~~~~

It had been a couple hours since the ceremony, my body feeling almost numb but jittery all at the same time. It was hard to shake all the love and words that were thrown my way today. Sure, some were probably just lying and saying random things because they had to, because they were conditioned to. But it freaked me out how some just... hit the right spots, knew my insecurities.

The party itself was fine. Two of the houses had parties happening in them, and since all three houses were connected, you could leave one and walk into another. There was a dancefloor full of people, and multiple fully stocked bars. Tons of food was at each table. It honestly looked like an adult prom. But I wasn't in a partying mood. Trey, on the other hand, was enjoying himself immensely. Girls and guys surrounded him, laughing at his jokes and bringing him plates of food and wine. One girl kept rubbing his thigh, staring at him longingly.

I wanted to leave. I had had enough of today, and I just wanted to be as far away from Empathic Love as I could be. I decided fresh air was what I needed, so I got up and slid out the back door of one of the houses, taking a deep breath. There were still too many people around, but I noticed the last house, the one with Colby's office in it, had no lights on and no one around it. I walked through the yards, stopping once I was by the back porch of the third house.

I sighed, leaning back against a railing. I could still hear the party going on, almost getting louder now that I wasn't there. I shook my head, feeling overwhelmed.

“Hey, Y/N. Fancy seeing you here." Colby's voice broke through my thoughts.

I exhaled. “Hi, Colby.”

He cocked his head, “Are you doing okay? You seem... upset.”

I felt this sudden rush of anger, knowing in reality he was to blame for all of this. “No, I'm not doing alright. I want to go home, I'm extremely overwhelmed by this party and all the people around here. That ceremony was too much for me to deal with, and the only way for me to get out of here is Trey and he's getting rubbed down by your followers!”

He took a step back, putting his hands up defensively. “Woah, that was a lot. You must have needed that release.”

I glared, “You think?”

“Look, I get it. It's a lot to take in. I myself don't love going to all these parties. It can be really overwhelming and if I'm honest, it gives me a lot of anxiety,” he admitted casually.

“You get anxiety?” I scoffed, “How? Everyone here loves you.”

“I know. That's the stressful part!” He sat on the railing, turning to me. “I'm the leader of this family. I have to make all the right decisions, and sometimes that means upsetting some of the people closest to me. Not to mention, so many eyes are on me, and it's just all too much sometimes. Even if you think this group is a cult, I still care for everyone here. I make sure they are fed, have a job, and have a life outside of here. And that's a lot to take on.”

“How do you deal with all of it, then?” I questioned.

“Patience. And a lot of alone time when I can get it - through meditation, specifically,” he laughed. “I was actually going to go meditate before I found you. Would you like to join me?”

I shook my head. “No, I'm good.”

“Are you sure? Look, at the very least, it will get you away from the party and all the noise. You don't even have to join me, you can just... sit in the room with me while I do it.” He argued, shrugging his shoulders.

I gazed at the party, everyone had grew rowdier while we were talking, and I didn't even notice. But my head felt like it was spinning from the noise alone. I sighed, nodding my head. Colby smiled, opening the door to the house, and I walked in first. I followed him up to his office, sitting down on his couch as he sat in the center of the room on the floor.

I raised an eyebrow. “That's where you meditate?”

“Yeah, I know it's a bit silly. But I feel so much more grounded... on the ground.” He replied cheekily.

I snickered, sitting back and watching him. He crossed his legs, resting his palms on his knees. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He took multiple breaths until they were low and shallow. I furrowed my brow, my eyes never leaving his form.

It almost seemed like he was asleep, or in a hypnosis of some sort. He was completely still and silent. A dull glow appeared at the top of his head, growing brighter and larger. I leaned away from him, my eyes widening at the sight. What the fuck is that...?

An aura grew around him, surrounding him completely. He didn't move, unfazed by it. His eyes remained closed, and with each breath it grew.

"How... are you doing that?" I uttered, my mouth a gape.

"Doing what?" He spoke in a monotone voice.

"That... aura. How are you doing that?" I pressed.

“I've always been able to do it since I was young. You can get closer if you want to.” He suggested.

How did he know I was still far away?

I stepped off the couch, moving closer to him. I kept my distance, but the aura was almost pulling me in. It was beautiful, the light reflecting and growing bigger. I was almost engulfed by it, but it stopped right before getting to me. I could feel its warmth, its energy. It was calling to me, beckoning me to step towards it.

The aura wrapped around me, filling me with light and love. Or at least that's what it felt like. I gasped at the sensation, my legs shaking underneath me. I breathed in deeply, my lungs filling up with fresh air. I didn't feel like I was in the room anymore. I felt like I was flying, the world almost zooming around me.

“Let your body relax, Y/N. I know it's so much to take in.” Colby’s calming voice spoke.

I felt my body give out on me, falling onto the soft rug. I laid down on my back, staring up at the ceiling. Visions began to swirl in my mind and around me.

How is any of this happening?

He answered, reading my mind. “Because of me. Because of us. Because of the connection you and I share.”

My body felt very heavy, unable to move even if I wanted to. I could move my eyes, and out of the corner of them, I saw Colby stand up. The aura remained around us, almost engulfing the entire room.

“You know, I knew the moment you stepped foot on to the compound's grounds, you were going to like it here. You were going to stay.” He smiled sincerely, gazing down at my body.

I blinked, confused. “What? I-I don't plan to-“

He cut me off, “This is the final step, Y/N. Everyone gave you love, people celebrated you, and now... I'm allowing you in.”

I wanted to shake my head, but couldn’t. “But I don't want to join.”

He chuckled, “Yes you do. If you didn't want it, none of this would have worked on you. You wouldn't be seeing what is directly in front of your eyes.”

The visions morphed around me, suddenly showing Colby and I. But we weren't us, we were different people, at a different point in time. But I could feel it was us. We were in love, growing a family together. Our lives were beautiful.

What the fuck is this?

“That is our past, or present, or future,” he winked. “The thing is, Y/N, I never seek out anyone. They all seem to find me.”

“That's not true, you emailed my boss about being interviewed.” I remarked.

"Oh, you are so forgetful, Y/N. You emailed us, begging to interview me and anyone else that said yes. I only agreed because I knew you wanted to meet with me. You sounded very eager to join in your email." Colby pulled out a piece of paper, reading from it happily, "Dear whoever reads this, I'm hoping to score an interview with your group, Empathic Love, for an article I am writing. I would love to meet Colby, and really pick apart his brain on why he created said group. Maybe I could even join if you guys win me over. Please let me know if any of this sounds of interest to you. Sincerely, Y/N of Global Gazette."

He leaned down, staring into my eyes mischievously, "Now does that sound like someone that didn't want to be here?"

My heart raced, suddenly scared. “Why don't I remember writing that?”

“I couldn't tell you. All I know is you wanted to be here. And there's a reason for it.” He sat down on the ground next to me. I wanted to get up and run, but my body stayed still, heavy. “Growing up, I realized very early on that certain people just... gravitated to me. A lot of women, yes. But really it was anyone. And not only did they gravitate towards me, they became obsessed with me. At first, I was confused, uninterested in ever going through that. Who wants someone obsessed with them? But then I realized how much good I could do with so many people rallying behind me.”

He continued, “As I got older, my ability, or power, or whatever it is - grew twice as strong. Suddenly, all the people around me followed me, did anything and everything I could ask for. Then, I began getting visions, and I understood why this was the case. Everyone here: we had a past life together. Their souls and mine have always been connected. They find me and then continue to stay. And almost always, they fall in love with me. It's just so glorious.”

“You're insane.” I mumbled.

He hummed, “Interesting, especially since you’re seeing the same things I am.”

It was true. The whole time he spoke, I saw vision after vision of our past lives together. We were always destined to meet, destined to be with one another.

“But the thing is, I know you're different from all the rest. You and I, we are meant to be together forever. You are meant to love me forever, and I am meant to love you. That's why my abilities affect you so greatly.” Colby divulged.

“What if I say no? What if I want to leave?” I grunted, trying to shake free.

“You've had the ability to go all this time. You just don't want to. You know how much love I can give you. You know how much pleasure I can give you as well.” He bit his lip, his eyes snaking up and down my body, “You've known that since yesterday, haven't you?”

Blood rushed to my cheeks, memories of yesterday played in my head.

“And do you know what’s crazy about that? That's not even half the pleasure I can give you.” Colby kneeled next to me, a devilish smile on his lips. His hand lightly brushed my face, cupping my warm cheek sweetly.

A burst of arousal raced through me, my body spasming in ecstasy. “Oh my God!”

“I know, it's a lot to take in. But I just want to make you feel good, darling. You deserve it.” He leaned in slowly, “You are mine, after all.”

"This is what your followers meant by a deep and sensual mental connection," I groaned, feeling hands all over my body, touching me in the most lustful of ways. "You got inside their heads and mentally fucked them."

“...That's one way of wording it. But if they didn't trust me, if they didn't already want me, it wouldn't happen.” He winced playfully, “So in reality, it's your fault.”

“Fuck you.” I growled.

“But baby, that's what's happening,” Colby laughed darkly. “Those hands, those kisses and bites... that's all mine. I can tell you're losing it. You want me real bad, but you don't want to admit it. I get it, you’re overwhelmed.”

I felt like my body was getting electrocuted with pleasure. My hips grinded into the air, needing some form of relief. My nipples strained against my bra, wanting any form of touch. I closed my eyes tightly, embarrassment rolling through me as I felt my damp panties against my sex.

Fuck, he was right. I did want this, and him.

I didn't even need to say it out loud. Suddenly I felt a cock slid inside of me, too easily from how wet I had become. I ripped my eyes open, looking around. Colby was watching me from his chair, smirking.

He palmed his hardening dick through his jeans. “Imagine how much better it would be if I was actually inside of you, filling you up with every. fucking. inch.”

I thought about screaming Trey’s name. Maybe he could help me.

He grimaced, rolling his eyes. “He won’t do anything for you, sweetheart. He joined our group just a couple weeks ago. Right around the time you sent the email. So really, you have all the more reason to join us.”

“Even if I join this cult, I will never stay here. I will leave here and never come back.” I hissed.

“And that is your choice to make. But Y/N,” his gaze lowered at me, his eyes intense. “You will never be satisfied. You got barely a taste of what I can offer you, and you're gonna want it forever. Just like everyone else here.”

“You're a- fuuuuuucckk!” I moaned, the cock inside of me hitting my spot deeper. I caught my breath, glaring at him. “Y-You're a freak.”

“Says the girl almost coming to my invisible dick.” He spat, clenching his jaw.

I bit my lip, annoyed at how right he was. The hands exploring my body gripped my ass, slapping it lustfully.

“Okay, okay. I'll agree with you. I am a bit of a freak of nature. But let's not act like I'm some monster. I let people leave. But they always come back because they choose to. I can't force people that far. Pinky promise,” He stuck his pinky out, and I rolled my eyes defiantly. He huffed, “It's not like this place is Scientology, for Christ's sake. We are love. I am love.”

“You are the most tainted form of love that I've ever met.” I retorted, gripping the rug to hide my building arousal.

He deadpanned, “Ow. That hurt.”

Colby strutted over to me, laying down right beside me. The pleasure grew more intense, my hips bucking desperately. His one hand hovered over me, never touching me. It didn't matter, because having him this close felt like his whole body was on top of mine, fucking me hastily.

“If you allow yourself to enjoy this feeling, you might actually come. Because I won't force you to. I'll just keep you here, for hours, riving in pleasure until your brain melts into goo.” He smirked, “How's that sound?”

"I-I hate you." I gritted my teeth. Why did I feel like I was lying?

"No you don't. But soon you'll be able to admit the truth." He leaned his mouth in close, his voice low and sincere, "I know that this place might not be what you imagined your home to be like, but it is. You will always have a place here. You will always be loved here. And I know that's what you want deep down. To be loved unconditionally. To have every fiber of your being satisfied. And if you let me, I will do that. I will please you every night, however you want me to. But for me to do that, you have to let me in. You have to let love in."

The cock inside of me pounded faster and faster. I could barely think anymore. The only thing on my mind... was him. The lives we had together, the life we could be having. I knew I shouldn't want it, but I did. I wanted him in my life, forever. He was what was missing, and I couldn't live one more day without him.

I mewled loudly, my hips thrusting up erotically. Colby's hand cupped my face gently, turning my head to look him in the eyes.

His alluring eyes stared deep into mine, his jaw clenched. "You will always be mine. I am love, and that is all you could ask for."

"You are love, and that's all I could ask for." I repeated mindlessly, grabbing onto his arm desperately.

His face softened, “That's right baby. You're such a good girl for me. My good girl, forever. You want that, don't you?”

“Yessss, please Colby. I want to be yours forever.” I keened.

"You will be. I promise, you will always be mine." His eyes darkened, the pupils almost completely blown out. "You will never leave."

"I won't!" I trembled, my orgasm building closer and closer to the edge.

“You wanna come, Y/N? Get close for me. Don't I feel so good inside of you? You like when I do this?” Colby's hand snaked down my body, rubbing my clit sensually.

I begged wantonly, dying to come. "Pleaseeeeee! Please let me come! I need it! I need you."

"Of course you do, baby. You and I need each other. Our connection is unlike anyone else's. Tell me the truth and I'll let you come." He leaned in close, his lips brushing against my ear, "Tell me, baby. Say it..."

"I love you," I cried out, right on the edge. I direly wanted him to say it back, knowing it was already the truth.

“I love you too, baby,” he smiled sweetly, kissing my cheek. “Now, come for me.”

Hot, white pleasure shot through my body. I had the strongest orgasm of my life, my mind shattering as I rode every wave of pleasure that went through me. Colby stayed by my side, shushing me as my high lowered down more and more. He kept whispering 'I love you' repeatedly, my mind unable to hear or think anything else after a while.

I blacked out at some point but awoke when my body was lifted off the floor and placed softly into a bed. “Wha... happenin?” I slurred.

“Relax, darling. I just brought you to my bed. Well, our bed now,” he chuckled. “I want you to get your rest because tomorrow is a big day for you.”

“What's tomorrow?” I murmured.

“Your introduction to everyone as my soulmate.” Colby informed happily, tucking me in. “Everyone will be so pleased that you changed your mind about joining us.”

I nodded my head, snuggling deep into his bed. He dimmed the lights, whispering softly, "Welcome home, Y/N."

[thisapplepielife]

Written for @steddieholidaydrabbles.

Santa Magic Coming Through

Prompt Day 22: Santa | Word Count: 564 | Rating: T | CW: None | Tags: Older Steddie, Mall Santa Eddie, Growing in His Santa Beard

Technically, this takes place in the same universe as my fic If You Only Believe from last year, but all you need to know is Eddie's a mall Santa and he met widowed Steve in the food court.

"I like it," Steve says, cupping both of Eddie's cheeks between his hands, "you look like you're you again."

Eddie laughs, "Me again? I didn't look like me yesterday?"

"No, you did. But the beard must have grown an extra millimeter overnight and now you look just like you did when we met."

Eddie smiles. It's funny that Steve would consider his beard to be his true self. He supposes that's how he first saw him, even if he's seen him clean-shaven, or in the process of growing the beard out, for much longer.

But yeah, Steve's not wrong. When Eddie looked in the mirror this morning he thought he was finally Santa ready, right on schedule. 

It's been almost a year since he spotted Steve sitting at that food court table, picking at his mall pretzel, and decided he needed to introduce himself.

A decision that changed his whole life.

"It's the Santa magic coming through," Eddie says, pulsing his fingers in the air, as if he's spreading magic around his head.

"Oh, is it now?" Steve asks, hands finding his hips, looking skeptical.

"Yep. Santa magic. I'm a card carrying Santa Claus, you know?" Eddie says, fingering his handlebar mustache. He'd waxed it this morning, getting back into practice, and it looks good.

"Oh, I know," Steve teases.

They're both joking around right now, but Eddie kind of believes it to be true. Every year he thinks maybe he waited too long to start growing the beard, and every year, no matter what date he started growing it, it fills out right on time.

He has his first team meeting at the mall this afternoon, just to get things ironed out, schedule-wise, for the upcoming holiday season. There's three of them, but he's been the main Santa for a few years now.

And he's always enjoyed it, but this year he's more excited than usual, because this year he has Steve. The best gift he's ever gotten. An unexpected, late in life miracle, full of more magic than even anything the Christmas season can bring.

Eddie sits on his throne, kids lined up to finally meet Santa, and Steve is sitting over at his table, a cinnamon roll in hand. But this time he's looking right at Eddie, and smiling. No sadness to be found. It looks so good on him, Eddie has to force himself back to the job at hand.

But Eddie sneaks glances as Steve watches Eddie do his job, entertaining the children. Steve looks happy, contented, and most importantly, he looks lighter.

He's happier this year.

They both are.

"Ho, ho, ho," Eddie booms in his best Santa voice, only slightly mimicking the department store Santa from A Christmas Story, as the next kid settles onto his knee to tell him their Christmas wishes for this year. No Red Ryder BB guns are asked for these days. Instead, he gets to hear about toys he's not exactly familiar with, and hopes parents come through with those wishes on Christmas morning. He never promises them anything, he can't. He has no control beyond the few minutes they are in his presence. 

He can only hope all their Christmas wishes come true, because his own already did.

And Eddie sneaks another glance, grinning, because Steve currently has Cinnabon icing clinging to his mustache at a table a few feet away. 

If you want to write your own, or see more entries for this challenge, pop on over to @steddieholidaydrabbles and follow along with the fun! 🎅

[gay-otlc]

two flowers in the wind

I'm working on a longer tiertice fic but in the meantime, take 400 words of rambling about their almost cognate relationship. Written for day 3 of tiertice week (prompt: jewelry). It's technically on time!

Title is from two flowers (dyed gold 2008) by the Maine because this is THE tiertice album oh my god

There is a ring hidden in a box in Prentice’s drawer. Tiergan finds it months after the mind break, when he finally wills himself to go through his lover’s things. His breath hitches as he slips it onto his finger. It fits perfectly, and he pulls it off in a rush. 

He can’t wear it, not with Prentice gone, unable to wear the other half of the set. He is half of a whole now, without Prentice, and the single ring only makes his absence even more achingly clear.

There’s a piece of paper too, neatly folded and tucked beneath the box. Tiergan unfolds it carefully. His chest feels hollow when he recognizes Prentice’s handwriting.

Tiergan,

I know you said you didn’t want to be cognates, and I respect your decision. But I’ve never stopped hoping you might change your mind. Maybe someday I’ll work up the nerve to offer this ring to you again.

Maybe someday you’ll say yes.

Prentice

Tiergan has to sit down. His head is spinning, doubts and regrets and what ifs swirling all around him. If only he’d said yes, when Prentice asked to be his cognate all those years ago. If only Prentice had asked again, if only he’d been less stubborn, he might have changed his mind.

If only Prentice was still here beside him.

“I’m sorry,” he says to the empty room. “I shouldn’t have said no. I trust you and I love you and I wish I’d been brave enough to be your cognate, but I wasn’t ready to be so open with anyone, not even you. And now…”

And now it’s too late, he thinks, but he can’t say it over the sudden lump in his throat. 

He can’t bring himself to wear the ring on his finger. He doesn’t think he deserves to, really, not after he had the chance to be Prentice’s cognate and still said no. But he can’t bring himself to let go of the ring either.

(It’s a foolish hope, but maybe someday Prentice will be healed. Maybe they’ll get another chance. Tiergan knows it’s unlikely, but he can’t stop himself from clinging to that possibility.)

Tiergan wears the ring on a necklace, tucked inside his shirt, close to his heart. Even as the months without Prentice turn to years, and the years turn to a decade, he doesn’t stop wearing the ring around his neck. He doesn’t stop loving Prentice. Doesn’t stop wishing things had gone differently. 

[mariaofdoranelle]

The Courtship Deception - Part 4: Wanderlust

Fic masterlist

Written for @throneofglassmicrofics

I faded the smut to black, sorry! I’m just a gemini who talks too much, I’m doing miracles with this word count already LOL

Warnings: closed-door sexytimes

Words: 863

“You really are a prince, aren’t you?” Aelin whispered to Rowan while ushering him out of the party.

“Technically, yes, but not really.”

“How does that work?”

“It works really well after some family drama with a tabloid-obsessed aunt.”

Dodging her father’s acquaintances was easier than avoiding his men’s questioning looks. Well, that’s what happens when her father told a bunch of big guys that they’re entitled to every detail of her life: they believed it. But they wouldn’t cause a scene if she didn’t either, and that’s how she was able to move through the crowd effortlessly with a man that wasn’t one of her suitors.

“Where’re you going?” Lorcan hissed, one of her Rhoe’s most trusted and least subtle men.

“Out!” Aelin barked while dragging Rowan out the main doors. But the man’s eyes weren’t on her, and something dawned on her. He was the one who came with Fenrys from Doranelle, wasn’t he? Was he friends with Rowan too, or just acquaintances?

Out of the main venue, Aelin found a storage closet of sorts and shoved Rowan in it, locking herself inside with him.

He sighed, taking in the tiny room. “I didn’t know you liked it tawdry.”

She crossed her arms. “You were talking about family drama and tabloids.”

“When we texted last night, I thought you’d want my mouth for entirely different reasons.”

“Well, I—“

Aelin was silenced by his hand holding onto the back of her neck, tilting her head toward his.

He raised a brow in question. *What do you want?* he seemed to ask.

Well, fuck. This was such a cheap trick, but she could Google her answers later to figure it out. Neck-grabbing with those rough hands? Not so easy to do on her own.

Aelin closed the distance between them, and their hands found each other’s bodies like magnets. Rowan’s kisses were rough and hungry; when he backed her against a shelving unit and sneaked a hand up her thigh, Aelin grasped how thoroughly ravished she was about to be.

She lost sight of her initial goal completely.

˜˜

Rowan had one hand on her waist and another using the shelf to hold himself upright. They were both panting, breaths mingling in that near claustrophobic closet.

He grabbed a few napkins behind her to dispose of the condom, and that was her cut to fix her hair and smooth down her dress.

“Can you—“ Aelin was brutally interrupted by a kiss. “I’ll be right back.”

She peeked out the door. The only person close by was Lorcan, looking grumpier than ever.

“Psst!” she called him. “Yes, c’mere.”

“You missed dinner.”

“Your friend didn’t.” Aelin smirked with the memory. Him kneeling before her, face between her thighs, was definitely something. “What time is it?”

Aelin had no way of knowing—she didn’t have her phone with her, and Rowan would do anything to avoid their conversation.

“Late.”

“But is it too late?”

The man gave her a hard look, and it was all she needed to know—no, it wasn’t too late, but she should get back to the party before her dad notices it and incites chaos. Still, she got back to the storage closet and locked the door again.

“Round two so soon?”

Aelin crossed her arms. “Family drama and tabloids. Spill.”

“You’re not unlocking that door until I tell you, I take it?”

“Absolutely not.”

Rowan sighed, but conceded. Then, he went on about how much he disagreed with Queen Maeve’s contrarian policies, and the rupture it created between him and his family. About how he left Doranelle without looking back, and only remained as a prince in name, since the royal family wouldn’t rescind his title for the media havoc it’d cause—even if he wasn’t so much in the public eye.

Prompted by Aelin, he told her about how he found a remote job with his engineering degree and traveled the world with no royal privileges and no money—for a prince’s standards, at least—, met people who weren’t royals or billionaires. How he lived his life with no constraints.

She liked it. She wanted it. To live freely, to travel without a team of bodyguards who reported everything to her father, to be able to drive on her own.

Just like that, Aelin saw a new plan unfold right before her eyes.

Moving from her father’s highly-guarded mansion to Dorian’s or Chaol’s castle with a different set of guards was just trading one pair of shackles for another.

But Rowan… she could live like him. She could live with him—anywhere and everywhere, like he’s been living so far. Rhoe could be so blinded by her having a royal title he’d forget that her groom was penniless. Rowan didn’t sound like the type to hold her down, he sounded like the type who would let her live her own life, or even give her a divorce if she truly desired it, no politics involved.

She’d keep her money and her relationship with her father, but also have freedom. It was perfect. It was her best plan so far.

“Rowan…” she trailed, uncertain of his reaction to her next words. “Will you marry me?”

You can get notified when I update by either turning notifications on for @mariaofdoranelle-fics or entering my (sometimes glitchy) tag list!!

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[enokito]

Tompercy AU Masterpost

As I'm taking a step back from tompercy for the time being, and having just finished my main ASOR-related WIP, I thought it would be a good idea to gather all my tompercy thoughts all in one accessible place (written and non-written). This post is also linked in my pinned. I am still technically taking prompts for this ship, though no promises in terms of filling them; you can also request any AU from the unwritten section of this post, and I'll do my best to oblige since I already have thoughts for most of those :)

Also, anyone is allowed to write a fic based on any of my prompts, or transform any of my works (ie translation, writing another story in one of my established universes, write something inspired by my fics/prompts, etc; just don’t repost my fics wholesale) — I simply ask that you link it to me somehow so that I can check it out!

Written

Superhero AU: a civilian and a mercenary (mid-length; series of one-shots) Features Percy as the only civilian in a family of superheros, a Deathstroke-inspired Tom as the world's deadliest mercenary, and a something-with-benefits type relationship.

Royalty AU(s): you should see me in a crown (short; series of one-shots) Tom is the heir to the throne, and Percy is a spy on a mission to kill the king totally normal librarian. Bizarre yearning vibes.

a mask of my own face (short one-shot) Mostly platonic, but still tompercy-centric; Tom is a well-known mercenary, and Percy is his mysterious masked client.

Vampires AUs: Crimson (short one-shot) Percy is a vampire, Tom is a wizard. Unarguably erotic, but somehow not erotica.

Sanguine (even shorter one-shot) Tom is a vampire, Percy is a wizard. Spiritual successor to Crimson. Somehow even more erotic (but still not erotica).

Faerie (And Adjacent) AUs: offer me his lips (short one-shot) Percy is fae, because the the urge to make him some kinda creature is never-ending. Tom is a wizard hoping to make a deal.

monsters of a feather (short one-shot + bonus) Tom is one of the most feared pirates to still sail the seas; Percy is a siren caged in the bowels of his ship, only ever let out to lure other ships into Tom's waiting hands.

ASOR Canon Divergence: Beloved (short two-shot) AU where tompercy is roommates during the war. Bizarre vibes just in general; the first tompercy fic I ever wrote.

crucio (short two-shot) AU where Percy becomes Tom's sworn companion at some unspecified time, presumably post-war. Bizarrely kind of erotic, but mostly fluffy.

lay all your love on me (fairly longform; it's about 30k words) ASOR alternate ending; canon divergent from the Forbidden Forest confrontation. Tom learns how to love. Featuring some of my favorite tags from any of my fics: "Percy Weasley is Bad at Feelings / 'Bad at feelings' doesn't even BEGIN to describe what's wrong with Tom Riddle". >> Now with sequel, which is about 10k words, and is mostly erotica with character study.

communing with dangerous men (shortform multi-shot) Vaguely associated with lay all your love; a Percy in some sort of post-war established relationship is thrown back in time to the late 1940s, when Tom is working at Borgin and Burke's. An even darker tompercy than I usually write, with lots of codependency, obsessive devotion, and eroticized gore.

1943 (short one-shot) Percy time travels for a third time, back to 1943; this is a gothic writing style study, but also one of my favorites on this list.

sworn companionship (short one-shot) similarly to it's golden hour somewhere, this is a collection of vignettes – variations on the theme "Percy Weasley as Tom Riddle's sworn companion". Features an ASOR bad ending, a Hogwarts AU, a Wool's Orphanage AU, and vignettes associated with lay all your love on me and communing with dangerous men

Other/Miscellaneous: it's golden hour somewhere (collection of short one-shots) This is a collection of three one-shots featuring tompercy interacting in the sun, following the theme, "in another world, we could've been so happy". Features a professor AU, a coffee shop AU, and a bonus/missing scene canon compliant to ASOR.

it ain't love (if it don't hurt) (extremely short one-shot) unclear what universe this takes place in; basically erotica, but lacking genitalia. The intimacy of torture.

little rabbit (short pwp one-shot) An omegaverse porn w/o plot, featuring a wolf!Tom and a bunny!Percy. No heat/rut/mating cycles, if you're not into that sort of thing, but there are still cnc elements; Tom chases Percy down in the woods.

pomegranate hearts (mid-length; series of one-shots) Featuring Percy as Hades, king of the dead and the underworld, Tom as Persephone, young god of spring all growing, sprouting things, and a tangible power dynamic so skewed in Percy's favor that their relationship comes out looking something like one of equals. Also, has a wider cast of characters than my usual fics, including Abraxas, Severus, and a more fanon-flavored Harry Potter than an ASOR flavored one.

From My Ideas Folder (Unwritten):

a civilian and a mercenary AU: Percy is trying to get a coffee when the shop is suddenly being held up. He's fully ready to go along with the hostage situation, just wanting to get his coffee and then go to work, but Tom shows up out of the blue and is having absolutely none of it.

Alternative relationship reveal: 5 times someone found out about Percy and Tom, and 1 time Percy actually told them. Featuring, probably, Tonks, Severus, and various Weasleys.

Time Travel AU(s): Percy time travels to the early 1940s and beats the shit out of someone for calling Tom a mudblood.

Time Traveler's Wife-esque AU where the sworn companionship ritual between Percy and Voldemort goes wrong or gets interrupted; a Percy who's soul is fundamentally attached to Tom's gets flung through time, appearing to young Tom at various points in his life (either involving scenes at Wool's Orphanage, Hogwarts, while Tom is working at Borgin and Burke's, while he is traveling the world, etc... OR Percy is transported to Tom immediately after he makes each horcrux, for a total of 7 times).

AU where Percy throws himself back in time a 3rd time to the 1930s... and it severely fucks up, leaving him in the body of 5 year old without the full mind, maturity, or memories of his adult self, with only snippets of nightmares and general motivations to guide him. He grows up alongside Tom at Wool's Orphanage, trying to protect him and take care of him, and they share an extremely intimate co-dependent relationship as kids that starts to rupture when they receive their Hogwarts letters. A snippet of this AU can be found in sworn companionship, and it's tentatively named guardian angel

communing with dangerous men sequel tentatively named step two: getting a pet dog potentially coming soon... 👀

ASOR Canon Divergence: Alternate ending where Tom wins the war, but Percy dies and comes back as a ghost (but Wrong; possibly soul-related complications, something sworn companionship related???). Percy has some form of amnesia, and either follows Tom around like a lost dog or haunts their flat, which Tom refuses to move out of for some reason.

Alternate ending where post-war Percy is told that all physical forms of Voldemort have been successfully destroyed, but a remnant remains harmlessly attached to his soul, mostly powerless, destined to die once he does. This results in a benevolent possession, Venom-esque dynamic where Tom is a snarky asshole living in Percy's head and occasionally taking over his body, and Percy just has to deal with that now.

Lay all your love adjacent t4t AU, with a transmasc!Tom who transitioned in childhood + promptly obliviated everyone into believing he was always male, and a very repressed transfem!Percy that Tom is slowly manipulating and coercing into being more feminine. I myself am genderqueer, but I find that I rarely write trans characters, so this would ultimately be an interrogation of that habit, a joyful study of transgender identity, and a massive fuck you to JK Rowling. Tentatively named portrait of a female

Other/Miscellaneous: Selkie!Percy AU tentatively named Salinity. Percy saves a young, orphanage-era Tom, they interact throughout the years, and Tom eventually returns to steal Percy's coat.

Animal hybrid AU with a bunny!Percy living in a cottage doing wizard stuff, and a wolf!Tom who breaks and enters in order to steal a magical artifact (I'm thinking a horcrux that Percy found by complete accident). And then he accidentally gets dog adopted. And then Percy has to contend with the fact that his new wolf familiar is actually a particularly attractive dark wizard. This one would be really funny honestly, it just seems kinda long. Also, Percy has massive glasses and velvety ears, by necessity of the AU.

Percy is a wizard who traveled a long ways to learn arcane magics from the immortal sage he heard is living in this mountaintop cave. Tom is a dragon that lives in a mountaintop cave, and who is not against adding this plucky young wizard to his hoard.

Short one-shot; Tom is a professional duelist, and Percy is very impressed.

Some sort of mixed-generation AU where Tom and Percy have been together since Hogwarts; after graduation they move in together, and Percy provides for the two of them with his Prewett heirship and ministry job. Tom is promiscuous and disloyal, Percy is devoted and willfully ignorant of Tom's various affairs – when he eventually confronts Tom, Tom casually leaves him for one of the many purebloods he's been courting, leaving Percy searching for a way to win him back. Vaguely inspired by the novel Naomi by Junichiro Tanizaki.

Kink community AU where Tom is an event host in the local community and Percy has stumbled upon the scene by complete accident at age 18-19. Drawn to Percy's naivete and vulnerability, Tom takes care to portray himself as being trustworthy (as he's something of a community leader), and takes Percy under his wing in order to take advantage of him.

Trafficlight SMP/death games AU with Tom as an extremely prolific killer on his red life, and Percy on his green life but nonetheless absolutely dedicated to serving Tom. Featuring red life bloodlust, irrational loyalty to what should've been a temporary alliance, betrayal, and reluctant affection/devotion. Tentatively named I bet on losing dogs.

Percy Weasley is the Dark Lord's favorite Death Eater. Could be ASOR bad ending/Voldemort wins AU, could be a Percy legitimately chooses to join Voldemort AU

[wetcatspellcaster]

Do you have any writing tips for newbie fic writers? Your descriptions are gorgeous. Thank you for pieces BTW, it's my favorite 'piece' of writing ❤️

hi anon, thank you for the kind words!💞💞 I'm flattered that I'm someone that you'd think to ask this question, so I'll do my best to answer! I've put my response beneath a keep reading cut to prevent it being a long post :)

I wasn't sure how to interpret this question, so I'll focus on 'technical' (?) tips mostly. Hope any of them help, in some small way!

my main tip to new fic writers is: write, first and foremost, for yourself, and to feed yourself. I've seen this perspective get put through the disk-horse ringer of late, so take it or leave it, or take it with as much of a pinch of salt as you need. But truly, from the bottom of my heart and from my position of sudden newfound popularity, this is the most important lesson I was ever given and so I have to say it. Popularity is not guaranteed. Even a popular fic will have haters and people who think it objectively sucks, and the readers who like you will never be fully pleased with what you've delivered. This could all be very depressing and cause an author to lose motivation.... if you make it the criteria for success in the first place. If you make the criteria for success your own happiness (or perhaps the happiness of you and a few close pals), providing yourself with what you, specifically, want to see, you will probably want to keep writing regardless of all other factors. Produce fics that you want to reread when you need comfort, when you are sick, and when you want to see your blorbos exactly the way you want them. This will make any fic worthwhile to you, regardless of stats, and prevent you from writing things that will suffer if your heart isn't in it! (this doesn't preclude gift fics/prompts! sometimes your heart can be 100% in providing food for others. find your key motivators, and feed that - a healthy amount - if you're trying to get into writing as a hobby!)

Now, onto my writing tips! I don't consider myself an expert and these are more lessons that have helped me, specifically, to improve my writing. But maybe something in here will be of use!

Bc you say you like descriptions... I tend to go into detail only when it's an essential thing that needs to be described. Leave wider details for readers to fill in with their own beautiful mind-palaces, and this gives you permission to go ham on what matters. What is it that matters? maybe it's a piece of the environment (say, a soul jar) or maybe it's just how hot one part of your ship is, in their hot clothes or out of them. If you focus on the important stuff but leave the rest to background, this not only creates a good balance of action to description, but it also shows the reader what they should prioritise in the scene.

I also google '[WORD] synonyms' a lot, for descriptions specifically. Which seems like it might be condescending advice, but it both helps you find different words if you're worried you're repeating yourself, and sometimes confirms that yes. You are using the best word actually, as you were.

Get a good balance of complex/simplistic words, as well as a good balance of complex/simplistic sentences. Sometimes you need a flowery description, sometimes you just need to state explicitly what is happening or the way things are. Tone will shift depending on your balance of these two things, so test the waters and see what works for you!

If you feel like you've written too much dialogue, the answer is probably no, you haven't written too much dialogue - for fic specifically. Most people are reading fic bc they want their faves to interact more. You are giving them more interaction and they will probably love it.

If you find phrases you like in the books/fic you read, it isn't plagiarism to use them so long as you recontextualise them. I'm certain I've used other people's words multiple times, particularly for my descriptions/imagery, and this is totally ok so long as the context is original. If you're worried, or its a whole sentence/interaction you like, examine the sentence/interaction and work out why you like it so much. Is it the sentence structure? Is the character dynamic? Is it the way the kiss plays out? Take the things you find sexiest in other people's writing and find ways to incorporate it into your own work!

I proofread by reading aloud. Yes, I sound mental and unhinged. My cats are worried about me. But this not only helps you catch mistakes, it helps to test the flow of a sentence! If you're ever worried a sentence is too long/a line of dialogue doesn't sound in character, read it aloud! This will help you work out if it's flowing or not, and if it isn't then you'll get some clues as to why!

Don't be afraid to take risks, if you want to take risks! This can apply to anything: being brave enough to put in a joke you're not sure people will find funny, describing something in a way you're worried people will find weird, tackling something from a perspective or POV that you find challenging. This may be a more intermediate tip, but you can start with small risks, and experimenting helps you find your writing voice! Taking risks makes your writing unique :) and I can't explain how much better my writing has gotten since I gave myself specific challenges. You will not get it perfectly write 100% of the time (there are some parts of Pieces that are weak compared to other parts) but it will always help you improve.

[lorifragolina]

Sweet Pies

Last entry for Mungrove Summer Bingo 2023 prompt: A1 Carnival It has been a large ride, thanks for all!!

@mungrovebingos

Carnival

Eddie Munson collected the mail near the gate while he’s returning home with his car. He found a brown envelope and he ripped the paper, smiling silly when he took a magazine from it.

The naked truth said the main title on the cover of that number of Carnival, the music and lifestyle magazine, where was a full body photo of Eddie, with a cowboy hat, a leather harness around his naked, tattooed chest and his thumb tucked in the belt of some black skinny jeans, pushing then down showing his happy trail.

The allusive pictures were not the spicier thing in the article about him, his music and especially his private life.

Eddie scoffed and started the car again, finally approaching the entrance of his mansion.

Billy and Steve would literally go crazy about it.

Eddie entered the fancy hotel in Boston, followed by an ice cold wind blow. He shot a flirting look to the receptionist.

“I’m here for Nancy Wheeler from Carnival” and in a minute a woman in a red suit came from a table of the restaurant, extending a hand to him and driving to a private table. Eddie took off the scarf with the skulls he was wearing (a silly present from his boyfriends that time he caught an illness insisting to get out without a jacket, being very fussy during an entire week) and ordered a double coffee, then sat down to relax on the small sofa.

Nancy placed a little recorder between them and started with some light chat, then took a notebook from her purse and stared at a page with a pen, for a minute or two.

“Do you mind if I smoke?” asked Eddie. The journalist shook her head, they were in the smokers area of the restaurant. He took his zippo from the pocket, looking at the engraved orca on it for a moment. It was Billy’s lighter and he took it by mistake when he left home, causing a fuss that Steve could barely manage. The gold ring at his finger sparkled when he moved his hand close to his face.

“So you’re ready to start the interview?” Nancy asked, checking the recorder.

“For you I’m always ready” cooed Eddie, and Nancy had a little shiver, although she knew he wasn’t interested in her, he couldn’t resist for a second to flirt.

She cleared her throat.

“Ok, let’s start” She smiled. “So, you started your solo career this year and you already have a new album rising in the ranks…”

He moved into his new mansion in Montecito last September, just a month after the last Corroded Coffin concert. The house was quite good and he had just to set his studio in the basement and fix a little the garden. Billy and Steve kept their apartments in Malibu and Portland, but only technically, in fact they lived there with him. Steve moved to the little keeper’s outbuilding in the garden, to write quietly, and sometimes he played the security guard at the gate, a thing that literally turned Eddie feral.

He had already planned to release a solo album at some point and had most of the songs already written, so the album was easy to record. He planned a little USA tour for the winter and, despite all his effort, an Europe tour between spring and summer. He was adamant to have at least a month free next summer to go away with his boyfriends, and although they have busy summer plans too, they all were looking forward to going to Mykonos in July.

Surprisingly, the album was full of love songs and ballads, and was an instant success. His fandom immediately associated those songs to his relationship with Billy; he wrote some of them for Steve too, but they didn’t come out yet as a poly couple, but for the moment it was enough. Thanks to the news of the house, they didn’t go out a lot lately, and they were happy in this way.

“And what did you feel when your bandmates decided to temporarily retire from the live shows? Are you still on good terms? And do you think about coming back with them sooner or later? -

Eddie smiled and shook the ashes off the cig.

Gareth and Martha tied the knot in late September in his hometown in Indiana, from when Corroded Coffin started and they all ran away just when they could. The ceremony was sweet and intimate, Gareth's Irish catholic family wasn’t quite happy Martha showed her almost six month belly, but she was so pretty and sweet that nobody cared after a while.

Eddie attended with Billy and Steve, Gareth insisted on that, and Billy, as usual, passed almost all the ceremony whipping softly behind his sunglasses. They felt a little too cocky and didn’t pay enough attention to professional and amateur photographers and someone almost caught the three kissing together behind the trees.

After the dinner Eddie was frankly drunk, Steve and Billy never saw him at that point, despite the heroic quantity of alcohol he usually drank when he was happy. He also lit a few joints and they were wetting themselves from laughing.

Eddie was dancing with Gareth's great-grandma, a little old lady with a cane who was incredibly agile despite it.

“I’m a little horny” Eddie drunk-said to the lady, who luckily was a little deaf. Billy was dancing with Gareth's little niece and overheard the conversation, his belly hurting for the laughs.

“Ok Eddie, time to go” He took Eddie and tried to drag him out of the dance floor; he whispered what had just happened to Steve and he doubled up with laughter too.

“Come on Eddie, sit down here” and Billy sat down too to catch his breath.

“Once I took a schoolm… a school… a friend over there and we caug… we caught… we thought there were wolves…” Eddie kept munching nonsense for some time, while Steve was trying to give him water.

“You want to kill me, this shit kills,” Eddie kept saying, trying to catch the glass but missing it badly. “You hate me? Do you hate me?”

Billy was in tears. “Come on, Billy please, put yourself together, you’re always crying!” mocked Steve, provoking more laughs and more tears.

Finally, Eddie drank the water and stayed for a moment, regaining control a little . Suddenly, he becomes a little pensative.

“Ehi” he said out of nothing. “Want to go there” and he pointed far in front of him. He got up and started walking to the woods.

“Eddie, Eds, wait!” Billy tried to stop him, but Eddie took his hand and they followed him.

A minute walking from the hotel they came to the trailer park. Eddie told them about his childhood with Wayne in a trailer and, although he bought his uncle a fancy house, he kept the trailer and sometimes went to rest there.

Eddie knew where the spare key was and they entered, in silence.

“Here is where you used to live?”

Eddie nodded. He entered his old room that Wayne was keeping as when he lived there, just a little more tidy and clean. He sat in the bed.

“You know? I never had a fuck here”.

Billy looked to Steve and found the same sparkling glare in his eyes. He knelt at Eddie’s side, and Steve knelt at the other.

“No? Really?” said Billy. “Why?” he opened Eddie’s belt and Steve took off his shirt from his pants.

“I wasn’t out, and I ran away right after the graduation” he smiled remembering while the two took off his pants and underwear completely.

“And now?” asked Steve, jerking a little Eddie’s dick, hard and leaking already.

“And now I will fuck both of you here” he grinned, pushing Steve’s head on his legs.

Billy whined biting the pillow while Eddie spread his legs a bit more. He was on his stomach, naked, a leg bent and filled by his boyfriend so good and deep. Eddie was grabbing him by his waist and fucking him with a blissful face and eyes closed. Steve jerked himself near Billy’s face, then pushed his dick in his mouth. Billy moaned and looked at him with eyes full of tears while Steve stuffed all his length deep into his throat. Eddie extended to kiss Steve passionately and pushed faster into Billy.

“Fuck, yes Eddie, yes” cried Billy, grabbing the sheet on the verge of coming.

“No” said Eddie, coming out from him. He tilted his head to Steve and he took his site behind Billy.

“Do you want more, Billy?” whispered Eddie on Billy’s ear, kissing him deeply with his tongue in his hungry lips.

“Yes please, please” he whined, jacking himself off on the bed. Eddie kissed Steve again and tickled him on his spine, rubbing on his tailbone, then pushing his fingers on him, kneeling behind him spreading the leg, still hard and willing.

“Come on, sweet pie” he whispered to Steve. He lined his dick to Billy’s pulsing ring, wet for Eddie’s precum and well stretched. He entered with a single move and Billy arched and cried. Eddie pushed him against the bed again, then coated his dick in lube again and glided smoothly inside Steve. He didn’t lose the pace he’s keeping in Billy, but arched in turn and bit his own lips.

Billy started shaking under them both and his breath broke, he jerked himself faster and pushed his face on the pillow coming hard in his own hand.

Eddie trapped Steve between his loins and Billy’s ass and came inside Steve pulling so hard his hips that Steve screamed in pain. Eddie collapsed on the bed at Billy’s side and Steve kept a little inside him, after loading him with a growl.

“Fuck…” he whined come out from Billy, letting him leaking and trembling, still spreading on the bed.

Eddie hugged Billy and Steve leaned his head on Billy’s back.

“So we revenged young Eddie, right?” whispered Billy, smiling sweetly.

Eddie whined, and didn’t answer, just hugged his boyfriends a little more.

They collected their clothes from the floor. Eddie sat in the bed putting his pants on, but suddenly he stopped, staring at the void.

“Eddie? All right?”

Eddie sighed, biting his lips.

“I want to marry you” he whispered.

“What?”

“I want to marry you”

Billy laughed. “We already have the rings, Eddie, don’t you remember?”

Eddie shook his head. “Yes, but I want to marry you, for real, I want a wedding, I want a party, I want everyone to cheer for the husbands, I want to have a ceremony with you…”

“Oh, Eddie…” Billy knelt to hug him. “I love you too” he kissed his forehead.

Steve hugged them both. “I wish I could marry you for real too… I love you”.

Nancy scribbled some notes about what Eddie told her about the solo album and his relationship with Gareth, then took a sip from her cup and looked at Eddie smiling.

“I know we agreed on the topics of this interview with your staff, but what about some more personal questions? Our readers are very avid about some particulars, obviously, if you want. If you’re more comfortable, I can turn off the recorder”.

Eddie nodded. “I can talk with you about everything” he flirted again, batting a little his eyelashes, and Nancy turned off the recorder with a little shiver.

“Well, you came out some years ago already. What about your recent flirt with Billy Hargrove, the supermodel?”

“It is not a flirt” said Eddie smiling, without harm in his voice.

Nancy blushed a little. “And what about this summer’s pictures in Mykonos? You know, Billy presumed cheating with Steve Harrington, who was working with you on his series soundtrack? It’s all good with your boyfriend now, or…”

Eddie scoffed, leaning back on the sofa with a smile. “I don’t know anything about Billy cheating” he said, without adding more explanation. “We’re doing very well and we are doing good together, and I work very well with Steve, of course. But he’s not my boyfriend anymore” Eddie waited for Nancy's reaction, and he didn't have to wait.

“What? Are you breaking up…” she sighed, really surprised.

Eddie giggled and raised his left hand. “If you promise to keep the secret, he will be my husband soon. And… ” Eddie blinked at Nancy. The recorder was turned off, but she scribbled in her notebook.

“Oh, come on, put a price tag on me and sell me already!” Eddie protested, shaking under Billy’s hands.

“Eddie, for Christ’s sake, stay still, stop wiggle”.

Eddie grunted again, snorting and looking in the mirror.

“Please, I feel all compressed, you know I don’t like it!”

“Stay straight and stop complaining. It’s Steve's big night, so shut up” Billy tied strong Eddie’s tie trying not to strangle him.

“If it’s Steve’s big night, why are you dressing me like that?”

Billy scoffed and pouted. “Because I know elegance. Now stop fussing!”.

Obviously, Eddie didn’t stop. “Why can’t I simply dress like at Gareth's wedding? I was elegant”.

“Look, leather pants and a vest were right, but I said you have to be classic for the gala. Last word” Billy dusted Eddie’s shoulders. He looked at himself in the mirror and barely recognized himself, he had a dark gray three piece tailed tight, a silver tie, cufflinks and coordinated leather shoes and belt. He felt like a puppet and he was really uncomfortable. Billy wore a similar suit, a little clearer, that really matched his colors, and seemed like he was wearing his pajamas.

“Now the hair” said Billy, and Eddie screamed.

They finally came to the gala and came out to the limo and walked to the red carpet.

It was the presentation gala of the new series The man who invented electricity based on Steve’s books, and Corroded Coffin did the soundtrack.

Eddie took Billy’s hand during the walk, waving at fans and posing for the photos, smiling and feeling like a scarecrow, furthermore, Billy won about his hair and now he had a messy bun that squeezed all his head. But he was quite happy, Billy was really beautiful at his side and didn’t let him go, grabbing his waist from time to time. They passed the photocall at the entrance and they gave the reporters a sweet kiss to talk about, and after a little interview they could enter and wait for the show.

Steve was already there, as principal guest, they were excited for their boyfriend’s big night.

Gareth was already in with a really pregnant Martha, they went away after the first part of the gala; Eddie was in charge for a little talk on behalf of Corroded Coffin and that reminded him of the Gelato gala at the beginning of the summer. He was so full of love at that moment, two beautiful pairs of eyes were chained to his’, and he fiddled with the silver ring.

When all the talking was done and the real gala started, Eddie and Billy sneaked out of the party and got into an empty room, where they drank from the classic Billy’s flask and started kissing. Eddie finally got rid of his stupid jacket and rubbed on Billy, who was really turned on by the alcohol and the glamour.

The door opened again and they froze.

“You better close the door,” said Steve, closing the lock.

“We’re waiting for you, sweet pie” smiled Billy.

“It’s your day” echoed Eddie, opening his arms for Steve.

They kissed their star of the day. He started touching Billy’s crotch, but he moved his hands.

“Oh no, sweetie, it’s your day” he repeated, and opened Steve’s belt. Eddie knelt in front of him, and Billy followed.

Steve licked his lips and grabbed both heads under him.

Eddie called for Steve and Billy from the entrance. They were watching the sport in the living room. Eddie waved at them, and they really didn’t pay attention to him. He showed the magazine to them from the door and then threw it to them on the sofa, and went on the stairs, waiting.

“Eddie!!” cried Billy with a feral crazy voice.

He ran upstairs. Steve came out the living room running behind him, and Billy followed him immediately, squealing.

“Eddie!! Where is that harness? Eddie!! Come here!”

They threw themselves on him in their room, falling in their big big bed; the TV kept talking alone in the living room, reflecting on the silver frame of a photo on the fireplace; they were together, in Tulum, with a big green arc of plant and white flowers, all dressed with white shirts and linen trousers, barefoot and a silly bouquet for each.

That day, only a few weeks after, they had a little private ceremony, although symbolic, and they exchanged their silver rings with three old fashioned yellow gold wedding rings.

They were husbands now, each other and forever.

[dream-beyond-the-fantasy]

Hello, this is @auradon-bore-a-don, sorry this is late but you are on my OC Creator Bingo Card!

1. What's your favorite thing about writing for your OCs?

2. Do you have a favorite OC?

3. What tropes do your OCs fit into?

4. What was the hardest scene to write for your OCs?

5. Which OC is the easiest to write for?

Hi! It's completely fine. We've all got things that push back some of the fun fandom stuff. Plus, there are so many OCs and creators to get to know.

I like exploring different worlds and ideas. And since Julie, Alyssa, and even Violet (my main HP OC, who I've barely started writing) have pieces of me in them, I like to explore different parts of myself or handle something that may have happened to me in a different way.

Probably Julie, but Alyssa is a close second.

My Cobra Kai OCs are the Main Characters/Protagonists in their fics, or at least share that role with Jimmy. Tropes that apply to Julie: love interest, tagalong kid, little sister heroine, teen mom, shrinking violet, annoying younger sibling/bratty half-pint (to Johnny and the Cobras, but I try to tone it down), precocious crush, and little miss badass. Tropes that apply to Alyssa: bratty teenage daughter (only some of the time), little miss snarker, middle child syndrome (played with), troubled child, and stoic woobie. Although, YMMV on whether the reader can see the characters as I do.

Honestly, some of the hardest things to write for my OCs are the tragic events in their lives. Sure, I haven't written some of them yet, but I know it will be difficult. Also, trying to write my first ever sex scene for Julie is proving to be fun but difficult.

Um, that might be Jenny. Jenny technically exists as a named and never seen character mentioned once on Cobra Kai. She is Jimmy's wife, but I basically created her character in Never Knew. She is a supportive wife and mom who isn't afraid to speak her mind. She is more mom than stepmom to Alyssa. Also, the sweet fluffy and romantic moments with Jimmy just write themselves. Also, Julie can be easy to write for when the prompt or story is filled with fluff.

[feeling-grubby]

Lore dump prompting right back @ u

:( sorry for taking a while to answer this. Been really low on energy lately. I hope it's alright I am answering now. ):

(: I'll catch you up on some lore that I have implemented on the blog that has been overlooked for this lore dump. As I want to try and keep feature plans under wraps. :)

:( some lore that has gotten overlooked is from two short stories I written. At least I think it was overlooked. It's Just Business is a short story focused on Tikvah. In it talks about her first technical client. Giving you a little look into her life before being a mechanic. It is revealed that she built an olive blood a protistic arm out of obligation for following orders, and later when that same olive died, she was able to salvage the arm and buy her freedom. She wasn't ever a slave. she was a servant for a high blood working off her debt. There is more to it than that, but that something more is part of future plans. Just don't tell Tikvah I told you. She will kill you if you know of her past. :) (: speaking of Tikvah I may be introducing some side character trolls to the blog soon connected to her and possibly making another main character troll for the blog connected to her mysterious past. Again, there is more that, but I really can't say right now. :) (: the second short story is called Metal, Flesh, and Blood. The main point of it is to show that Hollie is taking more risk in her line of work. Managing to get hurt more than ever. I can't tell you much of the event that happened to her to get her so injured, but I will say it is worked related but not in the way you would assume. It also shows how Tikvah subversions to her usual character traits. in the previous short story, you see how she works using logic and often ignores her emotions. She is analytical and puts emotions dead last. That doesn't mean she can't have emotions or can't care about people, but it is ultimately hidden in a weird way. The two have known each other for sweeps as Tikvah refuses to cash in on the favor Hollie owns her, and I really wanted to try to show how the two characters are individually, but also what their dynamic is. There is also way more I can talk about there, but I do want to try and keep things open ended. :)

:( in an ask you can see that Hollie is still distraught about the injuries she had received, and it is still haunting her. ):

(: and in this post this kind of reveals an answer to an ask that I couldn't really give with it being answered by Tikvah. As it would have been out of character to answer it directly. ): (: outside of those two characters some really light and funny lore that kind of has been said on the blog is that my local non-binary troll who is a possum reincarnated [: not literally :] has so far only befriended people finding them refilling through their trash. Literally has happened three times now. and you know what that's the only way other people's trolls can befriend her now. is finding them in their garbage. :)

(: thank you for the ask. I really appreciated this. :)

[bebepac]

A Piece of Heaven on Earth Part 6

This is my second submission for the last @wackydrabbles​​​​ prompt # 145 That was really really good which will appear in bold.

My OG Riley had to be a part of this.  She had to be. She started the wacky drabbles journey with me, it’s only fitting, my final submission is with her.  

This also is a submission for @choicesmonthlychallenge​​​​ for day 3 for paranormal.

The series:  A Piece of Heaven on Earth

The Book:  TRR

The Pairings: Liam x Riley /  Riley x Nico 

Word Count: 4599

Warnings and Ratings:  Profanity, Sexual Situation, 18+

Song Inspiration: When Can I see You by Babyface

Song Inspiration: Come Away With Me by Norah Jones

Song Inspiration Just a Dream by Nelly  

Summary: Riley moves in with Taylor until her apartment is vacated by Liam. Nico and Riley begin an relationship together. Team Liam launches an offensive to help bring Liam and Riley back together.

Original Post: 05/06/22 at 11:24PM  EST

A/N:  This is very special to me.  So please be kind.  I’m writing this as a tribute story to my Riley FC, the late Cheslie Kryst, in a way to deal with my grief which has almost been consuming my life.  I started following her in 2019 when I was watching the Miss USA pageant.  I rooted for her immediately.  Not only was she from my home state, but she was just this bright twinkling light on stage, she was a minority, like me. So when I came to the fandom in January 2020 and started writing stories for TRR I picked her as my Riley FC because she embodied what I wanted my “Riley” character to be.  Even in her untimely passing, I am still finding out more about her life and I have written her pretty accurately, even down to having depression.  So I will say it again.  If you need help please reach out.

A/N:  Last weekend I did a balloon release in honor of Cheslie’s birthday on the 28th of April.  It was very cathartic.  I think it helped.  I still really miss her a lot, and hope she saw  me in that moment, how much I did care for her as person.

A/N2:  This is the conclusion of A Piece of Heaven on Earth, I still plan  to do an epilogue.  I hope you have enjoyed what I have created so far in Cheslie’s honor.  

"Surprise!!!!"

"Riley oh my God! You’re here!"

“Guess who’s out of the hospital to crash with their baby sister!?!?!”

“I would have picked you up! Why didn’t you call me?”

"I didn’t want to be a burden, all you guys have had a hard time the last five months. It's okay! Besides, Nico was nice enough to call out of work, yet come to pick me up, from where we both work, and he’s doing all the manual labor of carrying all my stuff for me. Let him work."

“I heard that!”  Nico said with a smile as he walked up and  stood next to her, holding several boxes and a bag slung over his shoulder.

"I didn't mind helping you all out. Anything for my boo."  

"Alrighty." 

Taylor almost wanted to throw up in her mouth a bit. Riley was not "his boo." He only won this round by a technicality.

Chance shared Taylor's sentiment and  started growling at Nico from the door, but as soon as Nico passed the threshold into the house, Chance immediately started barking at Nico.

"Chance! Be nice!"

Riley said sternly to Chance causing him to whimper for a few moments. But the low guttural growl remained as he watched Nico. Chance did not like Nico, not one bit.  Chance’s main man was Liam.

Taylor smiled, it was like Chance was telling Nico, "Man Whore! Stay away from my Mama! She's already taken!!!!"

"You sure you don't mind putting me up for the next two weeks Tay?"

“Of course not! You’ll just have to sleep in the baby’s crib though.”

“What?”

“I’m kidding. KIDDING.  Actually, we have a nice patch of floor cleared next to Chance’s dog bed you can sleep on.”

“With a sister like you, who needs enemies?”  

“Max help Nico please!”    

She pulled Riley inside by her arm.

“No Riley, we got  you.”  Taylor teared up hugging her.

"Tay, I'm fine."

"Riley you just don't understand what these months have been like without you. I felt like half of me was gone. The best half, and the not punctual side."

Taylor laughed through the tears.

"Sure you missed me? Don't make me fall asleep for another three months."

"Too soon Riley. That joke was not even funny."  

Taylor shoved Riley but then pulled her in a hug.  

“I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“Be punctual maybe?”

“Exactly.”    

At dinner Taylor intently watched Riley with Nico.  They seemed close, friendly even, but something about them just seemed off.  There was something about the way Riley responded to him touching her.  Nico was teetering on clingy, which was definitely a turnoff.  Yes, it was clear he was completely smitten with her sister, but Riley didn’t seem to be completely relaxed with him, like she couldn’t be her true self with him.  Riley didn’t seem that into him honestly.

That evening Taylor decided to talk to Riley for a bit, and offer her some free sisterly advice as she  was settling down to sleep in the guest room.

“Hey Rye, are you comfortable?”

“Better than sleeping in a crib or sharing Chance’s dog bed with him.  I’m fine, thank you for letting him sleep in here with me.  He hasn’t left my side since I’ve been here. Chance was always affectionate, but this is next level for him.”

She looked down at him, smiling as his head rested on her stomach.  He licked her hand again, nuzzling it, causing Riley to rub his snout.  Chance’s tail wagged happily.

"I love you too boy." She gently scratched his forehead. Chance's tail wagged so much his whole body shook.

“He missed you Riley, so much. We all thought we were going to lose you. So what’s really up with you and Nico?”  

“He’s nice.  He makes me laugh, and you know, he’s not perfect, but  I can tell he really cares about me, and I don’t want to be alone anymore.  Life’s so short,  and it made me realize I work so much and don’t have anyone to spend my time off with other than Chance and you guys.  Nico is not a bad guy.”  

“He's not a bad guy Riley, but he’s not the right guy Riley.  He’s not.  You just said it yourself.  Life’s too short! Don’t you feel it?  You could be connected to someone, the way you always hoped, that you were. Like something’s missing. Someone is missing?”

“Everyone doesn’t get that feeling Taylor, like the world stops when they meet someone.  I’ve never felt that before.”

“You had it, you just don’t remember.  Try to remember Riley. Nico’s nice, but he’s not the one you’re supposed to be with.”  

That night when Riley was sleeping Chance woke up abruptly when she came into the room.  He growled softly; Riley stirred but did not wake.

“I am not going to hurt her, you little flea bag, I just need to give her a message.” 

Olivia leaned closer to Riley’s ear.  

"You know, you had one job Riley. Now I'm back to fix this. It's because I love him; I always will and he deserves to be happy is the only reason that I'm doing this for you. Otherwise, I'd let you stay with the overly clingy Man Whore. You're welcome.  Go to Apple Valley Park tomorrow morning for a run, and take your miserable mutt with you.”

She looked at Chance.

 "And yes, I am referring to you. You know what to do, Chance.”  Olivia bonked him on his nose.

“That’s one down, one to go.”  

Liam and Olivia

This was harder than she thought. She watched Liam sleeping; she sat on the edge of the bed.

"Hi my love.  You turned out exactly how I feared you would, from my passing.  And yes it means a lot to me that you held me in your heart for all this time as your wife, and I love you for it, but you have to let me go, it's time, dear heart, it's time. I was your first love.  And being loved by you Liam Rys, is a treasure that  I will cherish for all eternity. But, Riley Brooks is your last love. So I'm going to tell you exactly what you need to do to help her remember you. You will know what to do when it's time to reclaim her heart. But for now in the morning, go get breakfast at that place we used to love to go for bagels and muffins, get a coffee and go to Apple Valley Park, find a bench where the sun shines bright on you and warms you up, and just enjoy the morning. Chance will find you.  And soon, she will find her way back to you too. Be patient, and when the time is right, seal it with a kiss."

Olivia turned to walk away.

"Liv?"

She slowly turned around to face him, giving him a small wave.

"You were supposed to be sleeping Liam."

Liam's eyes were filled with tears. "I miss you so much Liv, and I don't deserve you doing this for me."

"I miss you, and yes you do. Liam, what happened to me wasn't your fault.  Stop blaming yourself; there is nothing that you could have done differently to save me. Riley was able to be saved, and you did it. You did a very selfless thing for her.  Be patient with her, Liam. Take things slow. Deep down, she feels the same about you, that you feel about her. And I know you tried not to, but it couldn't be helped, you fell in love with her. And it's okay."

"Thank you Liv."

"You're welcome."

The next morning Riley woke up  to Chance licking her face.

“I’m up. I’m up!  You know I’m technically still on vacation for a bit right?  We get to sleep in a little you know? But you don’t care.  You know what, how about after breakfast we go to the park.  Work off the bacon and pancakes we’re both about to eat. What do you say boy? Wanna go running?"

Chance happily barked in response.  

Riley was ambitious in her workout gear,

thinking she’d go running through the park. The run turned quickly into a jog, which just as quickly turned into a fast paced walk.

“Mama has to get her endurance back up,  Whew.  I don’t remember walking being this much of a workout. It’s okay though, we’re still getting some exercise in.”  

Chance was preoccupied and kept sniffing the ground as they walked.  

“Let’s go this way, Chance,” she gave him a gentle tug on his collar, but he instead started in the opposite direction.  

“Okay maybe not. We’ll go where you want to today. No it’s cool, all that obedience training we did together that I paid for, for you to have me follow the leader? It’s cool bro.”  

After a few minutes, Chance lunged, breaking the leash from his collar and took off running.  

“Dammit Chance, we already established Mama can’t run like she used to!!!!”

Chance had quite the lead, Riley tried to follow whilst screaming every command she could at him to get him to stop,  but he wasn’t listening to her at all. Chance had a singular purpose in mind, find Liam and he had finally picked up his scent.

Liam closed his eyes and smiled when he heard a dog's  barking  approaching him as he sat on the park bench.  Sitting his coffee down and half eaten bagel, he stood and turned, seeing Chance  bounding over the hill, happily barking heading straight towards him; Chance had found him.

He knelt down to pet Chance who was clearly happy to see him.  

“Good boy, you found me!  Riley said you were the bestest boy."

Liam looked around in confusion.  Riley was nowhere in sight.

"Where is your mom?"  

Finally Riley emerged over the hill, screaming Chance's name.

“I promise you he won't bite!!!”  She screamed from a distance out of breath. She leaned over her right hand on her hip; She looked like she was almost dry heaving.

Liam tapped his pant leg.  “Come on, boy, let's take you back to your mom.  She’s not coming down that hill. She looks tired."

Liam laughed softly at Riley’s sight.

Riley had sat down on the hill waiting for Chance to be brought back.

“Lose someone?”  Liam asked as he sat next to Riley on the hill.

“You’d think a dog with short legs couldn’t run that damn fast.  Or I'm just that damn slow lately."

She glanced up to his face.

“It’s you.  Liam right?”  

“Yeah. Hi Riley."

"How are you?"

"I'm doing great. No I'm exaggerating, I'm doing good."

Riley laughed at his joke.

“Chance went all Hulk and snapped his collar.”  

“Let me see, maybe I can fix it.”  

As she handed Liam the collar, his fingers  grazed her wrist, and what felt like an electric shock passed between the two of them.

Riley quickly drew her hand back from his, her mind drifting, she heard her own voice at the top of her lungs singing obnoxiously like it was a faint memory.  

“One thousand bottles of tahitian treat on the wall, a thousand bottles of tahitian treat……”  

"Isn't there a light you should be walking into, or considering your less than sunny disposition, infamous lake of fire?”

She looked at Liam. It sounded like his voice in the memory?

“I fixed it.  Are you alright?  You look pale.”  

"I'm fine." But Riley was continuing to stare at him oddly.

“If it’s all the same to you, I’m going to get you some water, okay?”

"That really sounds good. Thank you."

Liam came back a few minutes later with bottled water for Riley.

“It’s no Tahitian Treat, but it will get the job done.”  

“That’s my favorite drink. How did we know each other Liam?”  

He immediately remembered how Riley's Mother reacted to the news. He couldn't have that happen again or Riley to be afraid of him.

He heard Olivia's voice tell him to be patient.

“Our paths just randomly crossed.  Do you mind if I walk you back home just to make sure you make it there safely?”  

“I’m fine with that.”  

As they walked  he noticed Riley was walking slower.

"Are your feet hurting?"

"If I said yes, would you carry me?"

"Yes, I would." Liam responded without missing a beat.

Riley surprisingly looked at him; she was blushing.

"Good to know chivalry isn't dead."

"If you've ever been wondering of its existence Riley, that means you're with the wrong man."

Riley turned to face him.

“You’re with the wrong man.”  Liam said again.

Riley's eyes widened, and her breath hitched as she stared at him.

Wake up Riley and see me he thought to himself, I know you can feel it too. For a brief moment he saw a spark in her eyes, but it faded as quickly as it appeared.  She broke his intense gaze, motioning to the house.

"Well this is us.  Thank you Liam for the water,  and walking my dog for me."

"I didn’t mind at all. He's a great dog."  He handed Chance's leash back to Riley.

Taylor opened the door and when she saw Liam standing on the porch with Riley, she abruptly slammed it back.

“Well that WAS my sister.”  

Riley went to the door turning the doorknob and while Riley's back was turned Liam smiled. What was Taylor up to?

"Okay….and she locked the door too. You want to sit on the porch with me until I'm allowed back in? It’s a nice morning, and we have a kick ass porch swing here."

And that’s what Taylor was up to.

“Sure.”  

Liam sat on the porch swing with Riley, and instead  of Chance coming to her, he sat at Liam's feet playing with one of his dog toys.

"Chance seems really taken by you. Did we hang out with you a lot?"

"No. I only met Chance once. Not trying to boast, but dogs are excellent judges of people’s characters.  So it should tell you a lot, if a dog doesn’t like someone you’re around."

“That’s right!” Taylor screamed from inside the house.

“And we have an audience.  Taylor, are you going to let me in or what?”  

There was silence.

“And she’s ignoring me.”

There was more silence until the window opened.

"Psssst.  Hey Liam….Liam…. come  over here."

Liam walked over to the window  and Taylor handed him a small tray.

The tray included two slushy tahitian treats, which Liam took.  Taylor winked at him, closing the window.

  It felt like everyone knew they belonged together but Riley at this point.

Riley tossed the water aside, and when Liam sat next to her with the tray she grabbed one of the bottles off the tray.  

The conversation started flowing between her and Liam.  She felt so comfortable with him and it felt so natural, she couldn’t help it.  

Riley released one of the biggest burps she’d ever released in front of a guy.  

“I’m so sorry,” she commented laughing.

“No need to be sorry, that’s damn impressive.  You could give some of the frat boys I knew in college a run for their money. That was really really good."

Liam laughed and burped at the same time.  

“That didn’t feel good!”  Both continued laughing.

Finally after a while Riley faintly heard the door unlock.  Liam heard it too. He hoped Riley wouldn't just end the conversation and run inside,

 instead they talked for two more hours and got delivered another tray of snacks.

Finally though Liam did not want to be the one to leave,  he had to go sign the paperwork for his new apartment.  He thought Riley looked disappointed that he had to go.

One Week Later

"Taylor, you know I love you, and I say this from a place of love right? But you are freakishly obsessed with your sister’s love life, get away from the window!"

"Well I wouldn't be so obsessed if she wasn't with the wrong guy Max. She was supposed to meet Liam the night of her accident. And she still met him."

"She's a grown woman Taylor, hell!!  She's your older sister."

"By only six minutes I might add."

"Still older. Let her make her own decisions."

"This is not the right one." Taylor rubbed her stomach.

At that moment Riley walked in the door  pulling Nico by the hand.

Chance immediately started his low guttural growl as they went up stairs.

Riley locked the door behind Nico, and he pushed her against the door kissing her.

"Are you sure you want me to stay with you tonight?"

Riley bit her lip and nodded, she pulled off her top revealing bare skin to him.  Riley was everything he imagined.  Nico yanked off his shirt revealing his finely chiseled physique, Riley raised her eyebrow at him.  Both liked what the other had revealed.  Nico took that as a green light and grabbed her, pulling her close to him. As Nico picked her up, she wrapped her legs around him, and he loudly groaned, tightening his grip around her.  They tumbled onto the bed together.

  He cupped her breasts in his hands gently caressing her.  

Nico whispered. "I've been wanting this for so long, Riley.  I’ve imagined this moment so many times.”

Instead of responding back, she kissed him again.  She couldn’t say the same. She had never had a fantasy about Nico.  Not even one.  Yes he was handsome, but he never invaded her thoughts in that way.  She didn't mean for her mind to wander as his kisses had drifted to her neck, but it did. To many things, the way Chance always barked and growled in Nico's presence, talking with Liam on the porch, how he listened so intently to her,

and at the park… then something different but she felt like she was seeing it for the first time but it was her with Liam. But she didn’t remember this happening.

"Let's watch the sunset together, it looks like it's going to be a beautiful one."

They were together in a beautiful garden in the evening.

Side by side they stood, watching the sunset together enjoying a peaceful silence.

“Are your feet hurting?”  

“What would you do if they were, if I was your girlfriend?”  

“I’d carry you Riley.”

Riley smiled at Liam.  She could tell from her body language, she liked him so much, the most she had ever liked someone.

“What do you think it would have been like, if we would have met that night?”  

“I wouldn’t have been able to take my eyes off you, in that dress.  Just like now.”

“I wish it would have happened like that.”  

Riley’s heart was racing, but it wasn’t for  Nico.

"Nico…"

"I want you." Nico grunted his hands sliding up her skirt.

"No, Nico, I can't do this with you, I'm sorry."

Nico quickly pulled his hands away from her, but he could not hide the disappointment in his eyes.

"What's wrong?"

"This doesn't feel right."

"What can I do to make this right for you?"

"This isn’t about you Nico, it’s about me."

"I love you Riley, I always have."

"I love you too Nico, as a friend, and I don’t feel the way I should about you to be with you this way. I’ve been trying because I know how much you care."

"It’s because of him isn’t it? He told Hana he was your boyfriend."

“He what?”

“But you don’t even remember him, Riley. You let ME kiss you that day, not him!!!!!  That should tell you something. How good was he to you if you can’t even remember him?”

“And Chance doesn’t like you.”  

“Well Chance is an asshole.”  

Riley laughed in shock, pushing Nico away from her.  

“Dogs are great judges of character, and they know other dogs when they see them.  You know that staying the night was clearly not a good idea, maybe you should leave Nico.”

“You’re right, maybe I should.”  

Nico quickly got dressed and left, and that’s how Riley really knew he wasn’t the right one for her.  She really didn’t care.  Her mind drifted back to what appeared like a memory that she had no recollection of in the moment.  Was it real?  Something she imagined about him?  Liam seemed so genuine.  

The next day Riley decided to go to her apartment to see him.  She knocked on the door,  there was no answer.  She looked to the fire hydrant, and found her spare key and walked inside.  There was no sign of Liam anymore, as he had moved out.   Her other key to the apartment was lying on the counter.  She had no way of getting in touch with him.

Liam’s was settling into his new apartment was ironically two blocks away from Riley’s, and it was still close enough for him to walk to the Bodega for tahitian treats, which was what he was doing that day when the idea struck him.  He knew what he had to do.  Liv said he’d know what he needed to do when  the time was right.  

He didn’t know exactly when Riley would be moving back in.  So time was of the essence.  He had a plan.

Two days later,  Taylor took Riley home.  

“Dad had the place cleaned, but Liam was really neat, so it really didn’t need it.  Does it feel good to be home?”  

“It does.”  

“I loved having you at the house, but I know you need your space Rye.”

“Thank you for having me.”

Taylor gave her one last hug before she left.

Riley exhaled flopping onto her couch.  

“It’s finally just us again boy.”  she whispered to Chance scratching his head.  Chance curled up on the couch next to her.  

It was a beautiful day,  too beautiful to be sitting indoors. She decided to get up and go up to the rooftop of her apartment.  

Riley pushed the door open and was met by a blinding light.  When her eyes finally adjusted,  she was standing on the rooftop of her apartment that had been converted into a garden oasis. It was her garden, and it was absolutely breathtaking.  Who did this for her?

“And who the hell is going to take care of all of this? I’ve legit got a brown thumb.  Mother Nature or God,  I’m gonna need you to handle this!!!!”  Riley chuckled to herself, starting to wander through the beautiful and sweet smelling flowers.

There was a seat in the middle and on it sat a white rose.  For her?  It better be, it was her damn garden on top of her damn apartment.  She picked up the freshly clipped de-thorned rose, lifting it up to her nose, to breathe it in.  She closed her eyes as she sighed contentedly.  It was the most fragrant rose and its lovely scent filled her nostrils. Riley sat relaxing, basking in the sweet air and the warm sunshine.

Then she heard a voice… it was his voice, gentle, and so smooth it felt like he was part of the breeze.

“I wrote you a poem.  It’s the first one I've ever written, because I felt so inspired by your effortless beauty…

Soft, Sweet….

Sensually Smiling

Sighs… Softly…..

Shifting Stares….

Sharing Secrets…..

Shhhh……

Shuffling Silently

My Sweet Star.”

Footsteps approached her, and then a hand caressed her shoulder.

She knew it was him,  her soulmate , the one she had always been waiting for.  Riley immediately turned to gaze into his face, the man that had just made her grin like a giddy school girl in love.  

She turned to see… Liam standing there.  

“Nice poem, but when have you known me to be silent?”  

Liam burst out laughing.  

"I'm noisy, belch loudly,  and teeter on being obnoxious at times."

"You are, and I wouldn't have it any other way."

“Liam, tell me the truth.  I see how you look at me.  I can feel love leaping off of you in my direction, and I have these memories of you I don’t know how to explain, that I can't remember happened, but I feel like they are real.”

“They are real.”  

“So, we’ve been in a garden before?”

“Yes, we have."

"Why don't I remember it? It feels like I am watching a memory, not like I lived it."

"But you did live it Riley, and we meant something special to each other. "

"How did you get back into my apartment? You left your key."

"The spare key you keep under the fire hydrant."

"I had to trust you to tell you about that."

"You did Riley. You trusted me."

Riley stepped closer to him.

"Why can't I remember you?"

"Because your heart stopped. But mine didn't and I remember every moment you and I spent together fighting to save your life.

 The night of your accident Riley I was the blind date you were supposed to meet.  We were fated to meet, and we still did. While you were in a coma, your spirit came to me wearing a blue dress and heels.”  

Riley took another step towards him.  

“You were everything you just said about yourself, that you just highlighted as faults, but they are not and still somehow I fell love with you. You’re my Casper the cranky ghost.”  

Riley laughed out loud.

“That’s by far the craziest nickname anyone has ever given me.”

“Guess it’s fitting then because I’m crazy about you.”  

He heard Olivia’s voice say “Now Liam!”  

Riley’s breath hitched when Liam pulled her close. She closed her eyes as he closed in for their first kiss. 

 It was electrifying.  After a few moments Riley abruptly pulled away bursting into tears.

“Liam!!!!”  

She touched his face and then pressed her hand to his chest.

He rested his hand on hers.

“Finally I can really feel your warmth.  I remember everything.  Thank you and I’m sorry, I didn’t remember sooner.”  

“It’s okay.  We’re here now.”

Liam kissed Riley again.  

“Would you like to stay for dinner Liam?”  

“I’d love to.”  

“I haven’t been to the grocery store yet, so are you okay with pizza?”  

Finally Liam’s dream of a pizza night with Riley was coming true.

They went back down to Riley’s apartment where she ordered a large pizza.  

“I did leave you a few things though.”  

Liam opened the pantry door,  there sat a case of tahitian treats.  

“Um, two of those need to be in the freezer like right now.”  

“You got it.”  

She watched the two of them start to find their way together, as a new couple.  Both a little giddy after all they had been through and finally reuniting with each other once again.  Liam paid for the pizza when it arrived while Riley set the table and pulled out the drinks.  They genuinely looked so happy together.  It did hurt her a little watching how comfortable Liam was with her.  Riley was the remaining chapters in the book of his life. Riley would be the one that Liam would have children with and grow old with.  

 “Well Flea bag, my work here is done.  And for the record,  she’s not the only one you’ll do tricks for.  So Let’s Dance Chance!”  

Liam caught Olivia out of the corner of his eye for a split second before she disappeared, dancing with Chance, then only he remained dancing in a circle on his hind paws.  

He smiled back at Riley.  

“Got any plans for next week?”  

“I mean nothing firm set up yet why?”

“Let’s go to New York.”  

The trip neither thought they would be able to take together.

“I'd thought you’d never ask. "

Click here for the Epilogue of this Tribute Series!

[the---hermit]

It by Stephen King

This is going to be a very long post. Let's start with some more technical infos, I have read this for the studyblr w/ knives summer reading challenge 2.0, initially I wanted to use this only for the non linear time line prompt, but considering that this book is over 1200 pages, and it's the book that has been on my tbr for the longest time I decided it could work for the tbr prompt aswell. As I was mentioning this book has been on my nightstand for so many years, it's been on my tbr for almost 10 years now, and I have one failed attempt at reading this in the past. I was thinking to read another book for the tbr prompt, and I might even read it still for the challenge, but for now this brick of a book will count for two prompts. With this being said let's talk about the book itself. There's a lot to say, this will be spoiler free, and I'll add my spoiler-y thoughts under the cut not to ruin the book for anyone.

I'll start with a bit on the prompt, although there's so muc hgoing on it's quite impossible to give out an accurate idea. We are following our characters in two different timelines that intertwine amazingly (for real I was afraid things will get confusing but it was so well done, it made the plot even more intriguing). The first timeline is set in 1958 when the seven main characters were children and first dealing with It. The second time line is set in 1985, where our characters are adults and will have to come back to their roots in Derry. Everything starts in the 50s with the very well known scene of Georgie, Bill's younger brother, who is the first to be murdered by It, aka Pennywise the clown. After this iconic scene we start meeing the characters in their adult life as well as in their late childhood, learning who they are, and how they got to meet each other and had to face this terrifying nightmare that plagues the city of Derry. I won't say more about the plot, I feel like this gives a decent outline of the very base of the story, although as I said it's so layered it's impossible to explain.

Let's start with the things I liked. I definitely preferred the scenes set in the 50s, but mostly because of the kid's dynamics. In general as I said the time jumps are very well made, are never confusing, and in my opinion they serve the novel very well. What I loved is the friendship these characters have. I grew attached to all characters, who have all their very different personalities and history. The relationship they have is so pure it warmed my heart in so many occasions. You get to see their friendship bloom in such a natural pure way it's truly one of the best parts of this book. Overall friendship is a huge theme of the book and it was so well made. The characters are very well shown, I feel like you really get to know them, as if they were real people, and it's not something you get to experience with all books. Surely the lenght of the novel helps with this. The base idea of the novel is very cool, and as you might know if you have read other book reviews I have written I particularly like when horror stories deal with childhood fears. That is something particularly fascinating, and it never fails to work. This novel is fully based on that and looks at the fears of a kid in a very broad way, so there's a lot to talk about. I cannot say I am fully satisfied with the end of the novel. There's one particular thing I will discuss in the undercut because it needs spoilers, which was so unnecessary and irritating. But aside from that I feel like there's a couple of things in the end that felt confused, or maybe just like they didn't fully fit the rest of the novel. I don't even know how to explain it because it's complicated, but as I said I wasn't fully satisfied with the ending. Still there's a big potential I will reread it in the future. And on this a little side note, if I'll reread it I will surely pick up an English copy. I read my dad's vintage copy he bought in the 90s and the Italian translation was so poorly done. I really hope the newer editions have been edited because it was painful to read a times. Another thing I didn't like, and of which I have already complained in one of my daily posts is that especially in the first part of the novel there's some lines that feel straight out of the men writing women reddit. As I said in that other post I do not feel a particular need to know about the boobs of a characters while I am reading about them feeling anxious or scared. There are of course scenes in which a more sensual description, or simply a description of the body is needed. But there certainly were parts in which it was not necessary, and felt so random. It's not the first time I have noticed it in King's writing, and I cannot wrap my head around it. I must say there's parts of the novel in which a similar type of description is done on male characters, but just as in the first case it feels unnecessary and sometimes it could even be a bit uncomfortable.

Overall this book is such a huge story with so many layers I think it's impossible to have a full review that is satisfying, I am not even sure that discussing directly the book could be enough to do it justice, because there's so much. It's such a journey. I do recommend giving it a try if you feel interested in it, and I speak as someone who despised long books. This was incredibly fast-paced, and once you are into the story it feels like a drug. It was described to me as one of those books you want to finish to know what happens, but at the same time you don't want it to be over. And it's a great description, you need to know what happened and why, but you also don't want to let go of these characters. I think I'll need a good while to get over this novel. Also I need to mention that if you want to read this book you should check the trigger warning lists if you know there's stuff that might bothers you. I'm pretty sure the tw list for this novel is infinite because of everything that happens, from bullying, to homophobia, racism, very abusive and toxic parenting, just to name a few. It's also very graphic in describing violence so keep that in mind and check the tw lists online out just in case. As for the scary factor I personally didn't feel scared at all, there was one scene that did creep me out, but I am finding out it's more difficult than expected to scare. Still some people I know say this is the scariest book they read, fear is a very personal thing.

(spoilery thoughts under the cut)

This is my biggest complaint needs spoilers because there's one scene that felt so out of place an unnecessary I don't think I'll ever stop being annoyed at it. I am talking about the very end where in the 50s they kids are trying to get out of It's nest and apparently because their friendship is wearing out already they all need to have sex with Beverly. It was so unnecessary, and honestly kind of uncomfortable to read because it made no sense. There was no need to have that, their friendship worked amazingly, and this scene was just trown in there with no reason. Especially because as adults this whole bullshit thing does not happen, and they are not all present, but in that case their friendship still works perfectly. So really there's no back up for that scene, it just ruined the whole feeling for me. And the thing is that it has no consequences to the story, it's so umprompted and then it's just there with no real reason to exist. Can you tell I am pissed at it? The additional thing that annoys me is how yet again friendship between girls and boys have to be sexualised in some way, apparely it's impossible to have a friendship that stays a friendship if you are not of the same sex. It's a huge pet peeve of mine in all kinds of media whether it's books or shows and movies. In this novel in particular before this scene happened I had liked how Beverly's father, as well as other parental figures, mentioned how terrible a friendship between kids of different genders were bad. In the case of Bev's father to the point of accusing her to have had sex with her friends. The way Bev's reacted with absolute horror, because yes Ben might have feeling for her, and her and Bill really like each other, but at the end of the day they are just friends, was great. It shows how these friendship can be very deep but still just be platonic, but of course it had to be ruined. I hope this is making sense, because it turned in a rant that might not read as coherent as it is in my head. Overall this scene bothered me on many levels, and in the end was totally useless.

[rayneing-on-your-parade]

JonGerry week day 7: Promises

It's been a day, I was at my sister's house and we went apple picking and I made apple cider and apple butter. All of which are fantastic things. However, it meant I didn't have much time to write so I'm technically a little late but oh well.

Here's the last chapter of A Past Worth Fighting For, the prologue to my main fic How to Fall in Love Again. This prologue was written for @jongerryweek and followed their prompts for each day. Today I chose promises from the prompt list and decided to give Jon and Gerry the happy ending they deserve. For now.

A Past Worth Fighting For - Chapter 7 - Aspen_rayne - The Magnus Archives (Podcast) [Archive of Our Own]

If you're here you get to know the secret that I'm working on a jongerry art piece right now, keep an eye out for that eventually as well as two companion art pieces for A Past Worth Fighting For, one of the art Gerry gifted Jon and one of the Delano-Shelley-Sims family.

[massivedrickhead]

Bechloe Week 2021 - Day 2

July 27th: Bed sharing/one bed

Read on AO3

Fun fact - everything I’ve written/will write for Bechloe week this year are all part of the same universe, but they won’t be posted in chronological order. So at the end of the week I’ll probably put something up with a list of the prompts in chronological order :)

-

Beca was pretty sure that sharing a bed with Chloe Beale was simultaneously the worst and best thing that had ever happened to her.

It was almost unbearable to be that close to her without being able to touch her in the way she really wanted to.

Strike that.

It was unbearable.

But Beca couldn’t sleep any other way.

On those occasions when Chloe would sleep elsewhere, Beca would find herself unable to drop off.

She’d be up most of the night tossing and turning, unable to get comfortable, unable to shut her mind off.

It was as if Chloe’s mere presence could calm Beca in a way that nothing else could.

And then they would have these moments of complete vulnerability late at night.

Chloe would reach out with a featherlight touch and run a hand through Beca’s hair. So gentle that sometimes Beca thought she was imagining it.

“Bec?”

“Hmm?”

“I can’t sleep.”

“M’kay.”

Beca would roll over, still practically asleep, and lift her arm, allowing Chloe to either scoot back into her - making Beca the big spoon - or for her to rest her head on her chest.

Beca was usually already asleep by the time Chloe had gotten into a comfortable position, but she always seemed to register the soft “thanks,” that Chloe would whisper.

On those nights when it was Beca’s turn to be comforted, Chloe seemed to always know without Beca having to ask.

Logically, Beca knew it was probably down to the fact that Beca tossed and turned more, or played on her phone for longer, that tipped Chloe off, but she liked to think that Chloe just… knew.

“What do you need?” Chloe would ask, her voice quiet and thick with sleep.

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“That’s not an answer.”

“Can you do the hair thing?”

“Mhm.”

Chloe would then lie on her side and gently run her hands through Beca’s hair, her nails lightly scratching her scalp.

Her other hand would rest on Beca’s side or stomach - depending on if she was on her back or side - and her thumb would sweep gently back and forth.

In the daylight, neither would mention these moments. They’d usually wake up back on their respective sides, and if they didn’t whoever woke up first would pull away and climb out of bed - usually waking the other in the process.

And while these moments were nothing short of tortuous for Beca, they were still the favourite part of her day.

Because at two or three in the morning, nothing else matters. There are no distractions. No texts or emails to answer. No potential to be interrupted. Nowhere they needed to be.

They could just exist in the quiet together. Their bed was an island in the room. They could ask questions that, in the cold light of day, could be forgotten or ignored. They could share secrets or confess insecurities that neither would at any other time of day.

“Bec, do you believe in soulmates?”

“I don’t know. I think so. Do you?”

“Yeah. Of course.”

-

“If I hadn’t kissed Jesse, do you think things would be different?”

“Different how?”

“I don’t know. Just different. I dated him throughout all of college, maybe I missed experiencing some things?”

“Do you regret dating him so long?”

“No. I don’t think so.”

-

“Chlo’?”

“‘Yeah?”

“What if I don’t make it as a producer? What if I’m not good enough?”

“You’re the most talented person I know. You’ll make it.”

-

Over the years of being best friends with Chloe, she’d always had a crush on her. It had been a harmless thing really, she assumed everyone had a crush on Chloe.

Especially after a drunken confession to Aubrey had caused the blonde to let out a snort of laughter and say “girl, same.”

But this last year or so that they’d spent sharing a bed - sharing more of themselves with each other than they’d ever done before - Beca had fallen hard and fast and completely in love with Chloe.

Which, let’s be honest, wasn’t an ideal situation. Especially considering that, about three weeks ago, Chloe had started dating Chicago.

“He rescued us from the Med, Beca. I think I owe him a date.”

“Technically Amy and I rescued you. He turned up after the hard bit was done.”

Wearing a new dress and her highest heels, Chloe had thrown Beca a wink and said “don’t wait up!” as she left their apartment to meet him for the third time this week.

Once the door closed, Beca flopped back dramatically on the bed and let out a groan.

“You know you could tell her!” Amy called from her bedroom. “Actually, ignore that, that’s a bad idea. If she turned you down it would make our living situation way more awkward.”

“When not if,” Beca said, miserably. “Have you seen the abs on Shit-ago?”

(Yes, her nickname for Chicago was unnecessarily mean and childish, but give her a break.)

“If Chloe hadn’t accepted the date I would have climbed him like a tree,” Amy said.

“You could save me a lot of pain if you’d use those millions of dollars you have to move out so I could at least have my own room,” Beca said.

Amy left her room and was also looking dressed up for a night out.

“I’m doing you a favour captain,” Amy said. “If I move out you’ll have no excuse to share a bed anymore, and I know you can’t sleep without her. Besides, when she eventually moves in with Chicago, you won’t be able to afford the rent on your own.”

“Please don’t use his real name, it humanises him,” Beca said. “And what makes you think she’d move in with him? Has she said anything?”

“Not specifically, no. But things are obviously going well between them. It’s not out of the realm of possibility that Chloe has found ‘the one’,” Amy said. “So, you know, if you’re going to make a confession of love, time’s ticking.” She checked her phone. “I gotta go. If you are going to comfort eat please leave my Ben & Jerry’s out of it.”

“I make no promises,” Beca said.

“Hmm, due to your pathetic state, I’ll let you off. See you tomorrow!”

Beca spent the remainder of her night feeling sorry for herself, and making some truly self-indulgent mixes.

There were so many songs about unrequited love that Beca was never short of material, and when she finished she saved them in a hidden password-protected so no-one else could even accidentally listen to them.

No, these mixes weren’t going to help her career but they did make her feel at least a little bit better.

The crying and eating Amy’s ice-cream had helped too of course.

Beca was in bed by the time Chloe got back that night, and even thought she wasn’t asleep she pretended she was.

Chloe could always tell when Beca had been crying, and she definitely did not want to talk about the reason why.

So she closed her eyes when she heard the keys in the door, and kept them closed as the lights came on which was followed by the sound of high-heeled shoes walking across the apartment.

She felt the bed dip behind her, and heard the click of Chloe’s lamp turn on.

The bed jostled again, and the main light went off.

She heard running water from the bathroom as Chloe washed off her makeup and brushed her teeth, and then the sound of drawers opening as she searched for pyjamas.

She heard Chloe undressing, and tried not to picture it. She hoped Chloe didn’t need help with unzipping her dress, because she didn’t know if she could handle that right now.

Eventually the bed dipped again and the light went out.

She felt Chloe gently tug at the blankets so she could cover herself.

Then there was nothing but a calm silence.

Beca could tell by the way that Chloe was breathing that she wasn’t asleep yet and before she could stop herself, she was rolling over to face her.

“Hey,” she said.

“Hi,” Chloe replied. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

Beca just smiled as she looked at Chloe’s face in the moonlight. She was so beautiful.

“What?”

“Nothing,” Beca said. “How was your night?”

They were both whispering, even though they were the only two people in the apartment, and it was only a little after midnight.

“Fine,” Chloe said. “What did you get up to?”

“Made some mixes,” Beca said. “Before you ask, no. They’re not ready yet.”

Chloe grinned. “Not even for me?”

“Especially not for you.”

“Spoil sport,” Chloe said.

They fell into an easy silence while they just continued to look at each other, and Beca felt that tug in her heart again.

She wanted more than anything to just reach out and touch her. To tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. To sweep her thumb across her jaw.

To kiss her.

God, she wanted to kiss her.

She swallowed, and turned so she was lying on her back.

Amy was right. Time was running out if she was going to say something. And Beca knew she had to say something.

She just didn’t think she could look at Chloe while she said it.

“Is everything okay?” Chloe asked, in her gentlest voice that was always Beca’s undoing.

She just had to do it. She had to rip the bandaid off and deal with whatever came after.

If Chloe turned her down… well… their friendship could survive that.

Right?

“Are you gonna move in with Chicago?”

If she’d been looking at Chloe she’d have seen her frown.

“What? No, what made you ask that? We’ve only been dating for a couple of weeks,” Chloe sounded genuinely confused, and it spurred Beca on. “We’ve been on, like, six dates.”

“But is that something you could see yourself doing? With him, I mean.”

“I… I don’t know. I don’t really know him, I hadn’t thought about it. Why?”

Beca swallowed again.

It was now or never.

“Chloe, I… fuck, this is… look, this is hard, okay. I’m not good at this.”

“Bec, you’re kinda freaking me out,” Chloe said. She sat up and switched on the lamp on her nightstand.

Beca felt instantly exposed and vulnerable - way too vulnerable - and she was up and off the bed in seconds.

“Beca-”

“Just… just give me a second,” Beca said, her heart beating uncomfortably.

She could feel tears building in her eyes and, at that exact moment, they heard the sound of keys in the door before Amy walked in.

“Funny story,” she said, shutting the door and walking further into the room. “Turns out it’s next week that I’m staying-”

She stopped abruptly, realising she had stepped into some kind of emotional minefield.

“Uh oh,” she said. “Beca when I said you should tell her I didn’t mean toni-”

“Nope!” Beca said, loudly cutting her off before walking into the bathroom and locking the door behind her.

Okay, so this wasn’t exactly going to plan.

She had locked herself in the bathroom and was maybe on the verge of a panic attack.

Not an ideal situation.

“Beca,” Chloe said, knocking on the door. “Come on, you can’t stay in there forever.”

I can try, Beca thought.

When Beca didn't respond, or give any indication that she would come out of the bathroom anytime soon, Chloe turned to Amy with a huff of frustration.

“What just happened?”

“So… she didn’t tell you anything?”

“No! I think she was about to tell me something and then…” Chloe trailed off with a shrug. “I don’t know. Something freaked her out and then you showed up.”

“Look this is really not something I should - or want to - be involved in,” Amy said. “So I’m just gonna…” She jerked a thumb towards her bedroom. Amy made a hasty retreat and Chloe returned to the bathroom door.

“Beca, please,” Chloe said. “Look, even if you don’t wanna talk to me, can you just unlock the door so I can go pee. I’ve had like a full bottle of wine tonight and you know how small my bladder is.”

She heard the lock slide and Beca opened the door.

Chloe could see tears in her eyes despite the fact that Beca was doing everything in her power to avoid looking at her.

“Thank you,” Chloe said, as Beca moved aside to let her in.

It hadn’t been a lie, Chloe really did need to pee, so after she closed the door behind her, Beca sat down on the bed and let her head drop into her hands.

It’s probably for the best, she thought. It would ruin everything.

The light from the lamp had had the same sobering effect of daylight.

It reminded her of all the reasons she hadn’t told Chloe how she felt, and why she shouldn’t tell her now.

Any fantasies she could conjure up during the night were always chased away by the day.

While Chloe was stroking her hair in the moonlight, it was easy to imagine that they could be together, but those hopes were always replaced with facts the next day. And the same thing was happening now.

Beca felt something hard lodge itself in her chest as she came to a realisation.

She couldn’t keep doing this.

She’d have to start looking for a new place.

When she heard the toilet flush and the sound of running water she quickly wiped her eyes.

She didn’t look at Chloe when she came out, and kept her eyes fixed on her clasped hands in front of her.

“Are you gonna tell me what’s going on?”

“No,” Beca said. “It’s… it’s nothing. It was dumb. Can we just go to sleep?”

“Sure,” Chloe said with a sigh.

Beca didn’t get into bed until the light was off and then she lay with her back to Chloe.

“Night Bec.”

Beca swallowed again, hoping her voice was steady. “Night.”

Beca’s phone then lit up on her bedside table.

Amy: omg tell her or I will!!!

Beca read it, smiled briefly, and then locked her phone.

She didn’t say anything else, but after a few minutes of silence, Chloe rolled over and wrapped her arm around Beca’s middle. Her other hand started stroking through her hair.

“You get a headache when you cry,” she said softly, answering the question Beca hadn’t asked.

Something broke inside Beca, and she knew she couldn’t keep it in any longer.

“I’m in love with you Chloe.”

Chloe’s hand stilled and Beca’s heart seemed to stop beating.

The silence stretched on, and Beca had to fight every urge to run.

And then Chloe’s arm tightened around Beca’s waist, and she pulled her closer.

“What took you so long?”

Beca laughed and turned around to face her. Their faces were inches apart now, and Beca could see the tears building in Chloe’s eyes.

“I was scared,” she said, her voice breaking. “I was so fucking scared. I didn’t want to lose you.”

“You could never lose me,” Chloe replied. “You will never lose me. I promise.”

Her eyes traveled over Beca’s face, flicking between her eyes, looking for doubt or regret. She didn’t see either. She saw love and adoration. She saw vulnerability, hope, and a tiny fraction of fear.

“I’m in love with you too, Bec.”

And then the fear was gone from her eyes and her face broke into a grin.

“Yeah?” Beca asked, letting out a tearful laugh.

“Yeah,” Chloe replied.

“Can I kiss you?”

Chloe nodded, and their lips met a second later.

Tomorrow, in the cold light of day, Chloe would tell Chicago she didn’t think they should see each other anymore. Tomorrow, she would ask Beca on a date and if it went well - which she knew it would - she would ask her to be her girlfriend.

Tomorrow, when the sun was up, she would repeat these things they’d said to each other in the moonlight.

She’d tell Beca she loved her.

She’d tell Beca she’d always loved her.

And Beca would say it back. A thousand times. In a thousand different ways.

[ultimatebethylficlist]

Veteran Author of The Month: September 2021

The featured veteran author for September is a well-known and beloved name in the fandom, @rckyfrk !

Rckyfrk can be found on AO3 and FFN under the same penname.

When asked what got her into Bethyl and what the fandom means to her, she said:

I did not start watching TWD until late into Season 3. I don’t do well with horror. My husband would watch and I would just read a book in our bedroom or something. Well, one fateful night, I needed to get some work done on my laptop and didn’t feel like sitting in bed to get it finished, so I just stayed in the living room (our house was teeny tiny - there weren’t a lot of other places to go), and I turned so I wasn’t looking at the TV, plugged in my headphones, and got to work. Well, I glanced over and there was the wonder that is Daryl Dixon gracing my screen. I was instantly intrigued. (I believe my exact words were, “Who is that? What is he...DON’T DO THAT THERE’S ZOMBIES THERE!” and I was instantly hooked. Dammit. I found that as long as I could watch some of the behind the scenes stuff on how they make the walkers, it took some of the horror out of it and I could just focus on the artistry of all the makeup and stuff. Season 4 premiere, we had some friends come over for a “watching party,” (remember those?) and I was actually up getting refills for everyone (being the good hostess that I am) so I completely missed the hug in Beth’s cell and when I came back into the room, NO ONE THOUGHT THAT WAS IMPORTANT ENOUGH TO TELL ME ABOUT. (I thought they were my friends…) So I really didn’t start *shipping* Bethyl until “Alone.” I mean, I saw how close they were getting during “Still,” but I guess I didn’t realize what I was really seeing, you know? (Keep in mind, I was still a relatively new fan and had missed most of Season 3 and THE HUG.) Anyway, I couldn’t stand waiting for the next week to find out what happened to Beth, and thus began the ONLY time I have EVER looked for spoilers. That’s how I happened upon this crazy thing called “fan fiction,” (I honestly had never known such a thing existed before that fateful search.) I got to know some of the Bethyl writers, and someone suggested joining tumblr and writing my own stories, and the rest is history. Bethyl is the only pairing I’ve actually, actively shipped, before or after. The only two characters I’ve invested time in. The only two I’ve cried over (just ask @jbird9...hubs has seen me go through all kinds of emotions over these two). My boys can identify Beth and Daryl (they’ve NEVER seen an episode, not even a commercial for TWD, but recognize them from pics I’ve shown them.) The Bethyl fandom has brought me to meet some wonderful people, who probably know me better than members of my actual family. This fandom has been such a bright spot in my life, and has been so supportive even when the well has been dry for years (at least as far as new content from the show). I love you guys.

For her personal fic rec list, she recommends:

(Ugh. I’m really hesitant to come up with personal lists because I’ve read SO MANY WONDERFUL STORIES and I don’t want to leave any of them out, but I also know my brain and I’m not always the best at recalling names and places when I need to. I do want to give some love to:)

@gneebee [AO3] Love’s Highway and One Cold Night live in my head rent free

@piper1016 (basically anything she’s written) [AO3]

@inkinmytea (Audriss) [AO3] especially By Any Other Name

These ladies have been super supportive of my writing, and I can’t thank them enough.

I also really miss Pussyfoot by SaraiVe

is this how you say hello (in the zombie apocalypse) by the queen conquers (dastardly_dame)

Also, @leftmywingshome [AO3]

and @majicmarker​ [AO3] who not only write amazing Bethyl stories, but have their own original work published, all of which I strongly recommend reading.

There’s about a gazillion other stories that I’d like to recommend, but we’d be here all day if I listed them all. PLEASE don’t feel left out or disheartened if I didn’t pull your name from the deep recesses of my brain. I swear I’m not doing it on purpose. There are so many gifted writers in this fandom - we are SO lucky! - and I truly do appreciate @ultimatebethylficlist​ for recognizing the veterans and newbies equally.

Rckyfrk’s Works & Personal Thoughts:

Lady in Red and Man in Black Summary: It's finally the big day, Maggie and Glenn's wedding day. Beth is maid of honor, Daryl is the best man. - This started as a one-shot/prompt for Bethyl Week on Tumblr, but has evolved into becoming a full-sized story. Thoughts: I miss these babies. I had to take a break to try and get Terms and Conditions going because they are so drastically different from it, but now it’s been so long I almost have to get T & C out of my system before I can get my head back in the syrupy sweetness. Lady in Red started as a prompt (technically two) WAY back in the day. We’re talking back in the summer of 2014. The first two chapters received such a supportive response that it took on a life of its own, but it was solely from Beth’s POV, and I had Daryl in my head basically screaming to be heard, so Man in Black made its way in. The goal is to get MiB caught up with LiR, then write them simultaneously (mainly so no one knows what will be coming next and the reader gets to decide which “side” to read first).

Terms and Conditions Summary: It was Beth's first time in Atlanta by herself when the world decided to end. When she lost her way home, she winds up meeting a crossbow-toting man with steel blue eyes and a smile that gives her chills. This is not your typical Bethyl story - imagine if Daryl were more like Merle. Thoughts: I think this is the darkest thing I’ve written (and really, it’s not even that dark). I had this idea in my head for Daryl to be a lot more like Merle and all these little scenarios kept popping into my head of Beth “taming the beast,” and having them slowly fall in love despite how they met and him being a total jerk - at least in the beginning. I think there’s only going to be a couple more chapters of this one, I just need to buckle down and write them. Maybe that’s why I’m dragging my feet to do it. 

And once upon a time, I was writing a non-Bethyl story called “Summer of Learning,” which is actually kind of misleading. Back to that summer of 2014, where I was going through some fandom drama and was about to give up writing and tumblr all together when this group of Norman fans (we called ourselves his Harem...I miss you @basswipe and @unicorns-and-myblacksoul) came along and included me into their shenanigans. Anyway, they gave me the prompt “Imagine Sean Patrick Flanery is your dad’s best friend and teaches you everything there is to know about sex.” In the story, the main character’s parents are Norman and Emily, so it’s...Bethyl adjacent?

[peaches-writes]

seven hundred and one

description: seven centuries and you always seem to bump into hyunjin at least once in every one of them member: hyunjin genre: fluff, childhood friends to lovers au, slow burn (technically it is), historical au, vampire au (vampire!skz, implied incubus!hyunjin idk yall decide), witch au (immortal!reader), a sprinkle of established relationship towards the end, implied fem reader word count: 10.3k warning: explicit language, mentions of blood, murder, death, trauma, arson, suggestive (i turn 19 & suddenly i get brave lmao) note: hyunjin playing a thousand years on his post-mucore vlive that happened to fall on my birthday did things to my feelings + took a lot of liberties w the history & nature or vampires if that’s okay + if the narration is confusing just tell me lmao + established relationship au’s in detail makes my head spin ew cheesy stuff

zero

You have always been a traveler even in 1319 when you were still twelve and mortal. Being born and raised into a coven of witches at a time when witchcraft and other non-conforming practices were punishable by death, you naturally had to be for your own safety. Growing up, you had to move from village to village with your family, helping villagers in secret as your main source of income then leaving before word would inevitably and uncontrollably spread; thus leaving you with little to no room to grow intimate attachments with people who are not kin.

Not that you minded the last, anyway, because your mother would always remind you that you can always go back after some time. Korea was vast, then, but there were only a few places you could go to in a cycle. Then, you met Hyunjin.

Hwang Hyunjin has always been a prince, but especially in 1319 when he was still twelve and human. Besides his undeniably regal looks and naturally graceful disposition, he was also a noble in King Taejeong’s court. Of course, you’ve already forgotten his exact title at the time after centuries of living but you do have an inkling of a memory wherein he mentioned something about being related to the king somehow—this said memory being the first time you met him.

You don’t remember all the specific details now but you’re quite certain that you moved to the capital Hanseong in the first place because your mother’s services was requested by the king himself to treat one of his daughters, the only time the monarchy acknowledged you. You can also faintly remember being allowed to wander on your own at the marketplace right outside of the palace courts on the day you arrived only because you competed with your cousins over who can unpack their belongings the fastest and won.

Even now, over seven hundred years later, you’re still thankful that Chaeyeon and Chaeryeong somehow forgot some of their bags in your carriage that day or else you would’ve missed bumping into Hyunjin completely.

He was receiving his chosen bouquet of carnations from a flower stall at the market entrance when you approached, the bright colors of the display chrysanthemums initially catching your eye. As you asked the stand owner about the blue flowers, you noticed that Hyunjin didn’t seem to have any intentions of paying, prompting you to stop him from walking away to ask, “Aren’t you going to pay for that?”

Hyunjin momentarily froze in his steps before turning around to you with raised eyebrows, his head slowly turning from you to the pink flowers in his hands. After this brief pause, you then heard him laugh in amusement for the first time, confusing you further in the moment. “I, uh, I don’t have to. It’s—it’s free for me.”

Ever the curious child, you then asked next, “For you? Why?”

Hyunjin would confess to you later on, some time when you briefly met at an art exhibit in 1880s Spain, that he only entertained you because no one has ever asked him such question in a long time when you did. Because of his status, people both inside and outside the court would leave him alone to do whatever he wants and so he thought it was refreshing that you did otherwise when you first met. He also mentioned something about finding you cute in the fashion of your time but you always dismiss this in embarrassment. You were only seven, for crying out loud.

And so, taking a step closer to you, he then lifted the bouquet up to the level of your faces after he leaned down to your height and, with a mischievous smile, loudly whispered to you, “I’m from the palace courts—an important person to the king!”

Hyunjin still insists at present that he did tell you exactly what his title and relation to the king was but every time you challenge him to tell you what he said, he would clumsily steer the conversation away to something else. Besides this, you have always agreed that you furrowed your eyebrows deeper at him in response and replied, “Still, you should pay. Earning money is difficult these days.” which piqued Hyunjin’s interest in you further.

“I will,” He assured you smoothly, bringing the bouquet down after and turning to the stand owner. Gesturing to the chrysanthemums you’ve been eyeing, he then continues, “if you let me pay for your chrysanthemums. The reason why I couldn’t pay is because my money right now is too big, anyway.”

You protested against his offer politely, reasoning out that you had no intention of buying, but with Hyunjin’s status as a noble also came a persuasive charm to him. “Didn’t you just move here? I can tell with the travelling hanbok.” He pointed out to you, already gathering the best-looking chrysanthemums before he could even hear you say ‘yes.’ You started showing signs of giving in after some five minutes of friendly banter, prompting his optimism. “Consider this as a welcoming gift!”

You had no choice but to accept the flowers in the end with the promise of giving him something in return when you meet again around the palace courts after briefly mentioning your reason for moving to the capital. Holding your bouquet on your left hand to mirror Hyunjin’s bouquet on his right, you then extended your right hand to him before you could part ways. “I’m Y/N, by the way.” You then introduced yourself, already too focused then on thinking of how to repay Hyunjin. “In case I forget and you want to look for me.“

“Hwang Hyunjin. I would definitely not forget but really, you don’t have to repay me.” He smiled as he took your hand in his, reluctantly letting go only when older passersby gave you curious looks. “I just hope you have a good stay here in Hanseong!”

You then made a bracelet out of one stem of the chrysanthemums almost a month later as payment, preserving the petals inside transparent beads with an enchantment that would prevent them from losing their vibrant blue. By this time, you have been seeing Hyunjin almost every day around the palace grounds and with this, he has been slowly piecing together the entire reason for your court presence. With the bracelet, you indirectly confirmed your true nature to him and he wholeheartedly accepted you with a hug behind the hallway pillars.

“Your secret is safe with me.”

You‘ve been best friends ever since, even when you had to leave two years later. At present, Hyunjin still wears the bracelet—even when you insist in making him a new one.

“I like it.” He always tells you whenever you would bring it up. “I liked it then, I like it now, and I’ll like it forever.”

“It’s ancient.” You would scrunch up your nose in response. “You could literally sell it at the local museum.”

“Well, that says a lot about your age, doesn’t i—ow! Ow, I won’t say that ever again just sto—ya, stop hitting me!”

seven

Your family briefly returned to Hanseong five years after your stay to attend one of the elder princesses’ wedding, the same princess your mother has been tasked to treat when she was hired by the king. You were eighteen and almost ready to part with your coven in the event that your mother will ask when you turn nineteen in the fall, having grown particularly proficient in brewing potions after you first left the capital. Hyunjin, on the other hand, became a more prominent public figure in the courts at nineteen as talks of the king appointing one of his sons as crowned prince become more frequent, thus initially making your first reunion awkward.

“Should I address you as Your Highness?” You asked between your teeth as you carefully curtsied back at Hyunjin, glancing on the corners of your eyes in case the passing servants were sparing you looks. “I don’t really know how these things work.”

“No, no need, I don’t think anyone really cares.” He chuckled with a shake of his head as the two of you then simultaneously stood up straight. Looking around the two of you after, his grin then grew wider when he looked back at you before he engulfed you in a hug, startling you— even more when he lifted you up slightly from the ground and spun you once. “Oh, Y/N, I missed you!”

“Y-Ya! Hyunjin, p-put me down, someone could see!” You scolded him instinctively while frantically looking around for any signs of his or your relatives. “Hyunjin!”

“Don’t mind them!” He countered back at you, burying his face into the crook of your neck with a deep inhale after putting you down. “I missed you. You haven’t written since late Spring!”

You shrugged, feeling strangely cold when he pulled away after. “I’ve been—well, we‘ve been busy. It’s the summer so a lot of people are asking for us and most of my cousins, um, parted with us after my last letter.”

“Oh.” He frowned, having thought of it negatively at first. “I’m sorry about that.”

You remember distinctly shaking your head reassuringly at him over his apology, waving your hand dismissively in front of him at realizing that he misinterpreted. “No, it’s alright. When you turn nineteen, you’re given the choice as tradition—most of my older cousins just so happened to choose parting ways with us.” You then explained, even giving him a small smile. “It’s nothing personal. It does give us the younger ones more work, though, hence why I couldn’t write.”

With your explanation, Hyunjin then smiled. “Oh, oh, I see.” He muses. “Then, I’m glad we meet again after a long time! I really was starting to worry you were taking longer to reply!”

“Well, we’ll be staying here for two weeks—that should be enough time to catch up.” You then matched your smile with his, following him to the palace gardens when he offers you to, ‘for old time’s sake’ he reasoned. “Then at the end of the week, we get to attend a wedding! Honestly, I’m really excited, I’ve only ever seen weddings from afar when my aunt would perform rituals for good weather.”

“Then you’ll be in for a great time! Weddings are absolutely lovely, especially here in court!” He promised you that afternoon before proceeding to recall to you the countless weddings that have happened within the confines of the palace courts in his life.

Only, the wedding somehow ended in catastrophe when the day actually came because of a group of hired assassins who managed to get to nearly every one of the royal family in attendance including Hyunjin.

“Hyunjin!” You cried for him amidst the stampede and the fire that has somehow started from one of the guest tables, Chaeyeon and Chaeryeong tugging you in the opposite direction by your arms and waist waist and preventing you from running back to his bloodied body. “Hyunjin!”

“Y/N, no, we have to leave!” Chaeryeong scolded you countless of times that night, tears streaming down her own face in fear as your mothers and aunts ushered your entire coven to retreat back to the woods. “We have to go!”

“B-But Hyunjin!” You insisted in between sobs every single time, your attempts at escaping your cousins’ grasps becoming weaker and weaker until they eventually managed to reunite you with the rest of your coven after. “We can still save him—I can save him! He’s still conscious, for God’s sake!”

Hyunjin received two fatal stab wounds to his chest and stomach that night as one of the assassins’ last few victims before fleeing because of the fire, pushing him on his stomach to the ground in his own pool of blood. Even with the fear and panic coursing through your veins and your blurry vision as you navigated your way through the chaos, you knew that you could heal him quickly with the right enchantments and potions and that you could carry him with you all the way to the forest where your needed herbs could possibly be available but your cousins wouldn’t listen to you, forcing you to abandon your friend that night for your own sake.

You remember vividly, even to this day, this particular image of Hyunjin seemingly dying on the ground, eyes pleading you to follow your cousins as he clutched his chest and choked on his own blood, because it still gives you nightmares every night despite the assurance that he was eventually saved. Hyunjin laughs at you over this now but whenever you would scowl and hit him in the arm for making it seem as if he thinks of his human death as a joke, he would immediately pull you into his embrace and apologize.

“I’m sorry.” He always whispers in your ear at present, stroking your hair and hugging you significantly tighter each time. “It’s just that it’s all in the past now and I’ve let it go way back. I just hope you do too because I’m still here—and I’ll always be.”

“I don’t think I can—not in a hundred more years, I think.” You would frown in response, also recently acquiring the habit of gathering fistfuls of his shirt in the process. “It’s too—it’s too—“

“I understand. Shh. I’m sorry, again...”

nine

In the event that a family member turns twenty-one, your entire extended family gathers to perform a ritual on the full moon after their date of birth in order to grant them immortality which can only be broken by willful death. It was an ancient and seemingly controversial tradition unique to your family, the elder generations were close and wanted to be close with everyone in this fashion.

When you were younger, with your innocent sense of adventure, you’ve always looked forward to being the recipient of this particular ritual at the thought that it would give you more time to explore both in and, hopefully, out of Korea. But when it came to the first full moon after your twenty-first birthday, you felt nothing but dread throughout the entire night.

“I just think it’s meaningless!” You cried into Chaeryeong’s shoulder once you’ve managed to return to your lodgings, pulling your knees closer to your chest as the two of you sat in your bed. “Why should I continue living when I have nothing to look forward to anymore? When someone else deserved to live?”

Chaeryeong still feels guilty about it even at present, often apologizing to Hyunjin whenever she would come across him, but she felt this feeling the heaviest in this moment hundreds if years ago as she stroked your back comfortingly. “I’m so sorry, Y/N...I know anything I can say right now wouldn’t make you feel better or make what happened right but I’m so sorry. It was you or him and Chaeyeon and I had to make a choice.”

“But w-we could’ve—we could’ve s-saved him!”

“I know, I know, and I’m sorry...”

“Hyunjin, my best friend—“ You sobbed until morning despite Chaeryeong’s pleas for you to sleep. “My Hyunjin, he’s gone because of me.”

And until morning, Chaeryeong kept an eye out for you in case you did something to yourself as you mourned. “None of it was your fault. If anything, it was mine.” She told you over and over again until you fell asleep at sunrise. “Y/N, please...”

Chaeryeong and Chaeyeon ended up watching over you closely for the two months that followed, wary of your actions until you confronted them again about it and assured them that you weren’t thinking about doing something else that could potentially harm you.

You then completely parted ways with them after.

eighty-eight

You have already travelled the entirety of Korea on your own once when you unexpectedly meet Hyunjin again. Eighty-one years after his supposed death and with a new king already on the throne, you‘ve almost forgotten all about your childhood best friend because of the passing time that it completely startled you when you saw a glimpse of his face in the crowd of a village somewhere in Pyongyang.

He smiled at you from afar in the brief second your eyes first met, even subtly tipping his hat as he walked towards you from the opposite direction which effectively froze you in the middle of the street.

Shaking your head in thought, you frowned and look away at the seemingly random remembrance of the past. You’ve always thought then that you’ve already forgotten most of your childhood, especially those that ended in tragedy, and so you instantly felt a wave of disappointment in yourself at suddenly seeing a familiar face of the past in the crowd.

But when you looked up and see that Hyunjin has already reached you on your spot, your breath got caught in your throat and your eyes began to sting in the moment as tears threatened to fall at the sight of seeing your best friend’s smile again in person. You then instinctively held out a hand to touch his hanbok. “Y-You—y-you’re—“

“I-I’m alive...” He stammered out almost in the same fashion as you, his grin only growing bigger after the longer you stood frozen in front of him. When you don’t respond immediately in prolonged shock, he then lifted you up in a hug, planting your feet right on top of his this time as he pulled you impossibly closer to him. “I missed you, very, very much. I thought I’d never see you again.”

It took you a long moment to hug him back, making some passersby look. “I thought I—I thought that I’d never see you again.” You reply once you find your voice again, warily lifting your hands up to his shoulders as if he might disappear. “How are you—h-how are you alive?”

Pulling away briefly to examine his face, you then added, “A-and you look the same...”

At first, Hyunjin only shook his head at you, still overwhelmed at finally seeing you again to care about explaining. “I’ll, uh, I’ll explain everything later.” He whispered to you, pressing his forehead to yours and closing his eyes as he sighs in relief. “Please, just...let me hold you for now.”

After this scene in public, Hyunjin then took you to the lodgings where he was staying at with his friend, Seungmin, whom you would eventually came to realize was the vampire who saved him that night along with the fact that your best friend was now a vampire himself. “I was passing by the palace grounds on the way to a safe passage to the next village.” Seungmin elaborated further on Hyunjin’s story over a cup of tea and buckets of crying. “When I saw the fire, I got curious and approached then I saw Hyunjin trying to crawl out to safety so I helped him up, took him to the forest, and turned him.”

Seungmin would also tell you much later on, when you meet again by chance centuries later in 1930s Thailand, that he also didn’t know first-aid at the time so his immediate alternative was to turn Hyunjin in panic, having seen another friend of his, Chan, do it in a similar extreme emergency situation. Hyunjin also laughs at this at present, especially when he first found out, and you’d let yourself giggle occasionally but you always make sure to thank him sincerely after, even when he always assures you that it’s nothing. “You helped me reunite with my best friend.” You would tell him, your voice always low enough so only Seungmin would hear even with Hyunjin’s enhanced hearing. “You didn’t just saved him that night, you saved me too—just eighty-one years later—so thank you.”

And so, you ended up travelling with the two for almost a hundred and fifty years, eventually meeting Seungmin’s other nomadic friends while helping Hyunjin adjust better to his new lifestyle and developing skills. You only had to forcibly part ways after because your mother sent you a letter all the way from Xinjiang, China, requesting for your presence at a family member’s funeral.

“The mourning period for our family is is fifty years,” You explained to the two on the morning you had to leave them. You were staying in Beijing during this time in 1657. “and she was my mother’s favourite sister, I have to be there for her, especially.”

Hyunjin had a slight frown in his face until you left on a horse-drawn carriage that day but he straightened it out into a thin line and pursed his lips once: when he came to hug you goodbye as you were packing, wrapping his arms around your waist in a back hug. “Write to me, please?” He pleaded over your shoulder. “If we really have to be apart again for a long time, then at least write to me.”

You nodded at his request, swiftly turning around to prperly hug him back. “I will, promise, just tell me where you’ll be next.” You instructed him, pulling away after to hug Seungmin goodbye. “Please take good care of yourselves and always be careful.”

“We will.” Seungmin assures you sincerely, having grown fond of you in a familial way over the years. “You take care, too.”

“I’ll see you again very soon!”

Hyunjin received a letter from you almost two months later, thus beginning your hundred years long correspondence. 

three-hundred eighty-eight

When the fifty-year mourning period for your family ended, your mother asked you to stay with her longer, prompting you to write to Hyunjin that you’ll have to extend your time away before being free to meet him again. Simultaneously, Hyunjin began writing to you about his and Seungmin’s adventures with Chan, Minho, Changbin, and Seungmin around Asia, especially the possibility of him and his friends of the same nature forming a coven amongst themselves and how he had somewhat developed a vampiric gift, the latter of which he couldn’t write to you about explicitly until you accidentally met again in person a month before your extended stay was over.

Well, you’re still not sure at present if you really did meet in person at the time because, besides some subtle inaccuracies in the memory itself, there would be times at present when Hyunjin would insist that you did and times when he would deny it completely in embarrassment. “You know, maybe you were just fever dreaming me up, then!” Hyunjin would tell you now whenever he feels like denying it as a slight blush creeps up his cheeks, coughing awkwardly in between and making sure to run as far away from you as possible. “Or maybe—ha!—did you have a crush on me as early as the 1600s? You know, they do say that distance makes the heart grow fonde—ow!”

But dream or not, this memory is still burned at the very back of your head even hundreds of years later and it’s embarrassingly awful that all of your telepath and clairvoyant friends either joke or complain to you about it from seeing fragments of it replay in your thoughts often.

In this memory, you met Hyunjin in your house at Xinjiang while your mother was away to run errands. You consider this as one of your biggest hints that this was a dream since Hyunjin and his friends were in Laos until you met with them halfway later on along with the fact that he appeared in your bedroom of all places when you have long made it a habit of placing all kinds of protective charms in this particular space of yours.

“H-Hyunjin?” You called out for him when you saw his reflection in the mirror as you worked on your desk, glancing over your shoulder with a fond smile on his lips. Turning around, you then jumped up from your seat and right into his arms, laughing in disbelief when you felt him encircle his arms around your waist. “Hyunjin! When did you get here? How did you get here? I thought you’re in—”

His laugh that followed still echoes at the back of your head occasionally, even more the feeling of his lips pressing a feathery kiss on the fabric draped over your shoulders. “Doesn’t matter, I’m here.” He dismissed with a sigh, pulling away from the hug after in order to gently cup your face in his hands. Tilting his head down slightly to level with your eyes, a smirk then formed on his lips as he studied your features carefully and added, “I missed you. You look even more beautiful than when we last met.”

Hyunjin insists that you’re exaggerating this part but his closest friend and current roommate, Jeongin, is a mind reader and the poor boy accidentally sees through your thoughts that it isn’t every time he brings it up, making everyone in the vicinity feel awkward and embarrassed. It also doesn’t help that, in this memory, you’re quite sure that Hyunjin surprised you with a kiss after, urgently crashing his lips onto yours and backing you up to your desk.

You always make sure to keep it in a part in your thoughts that Jeongin can’t read but, besides your genuine shock, you initially didn’t pull away from the kiss because of the feeling that the gesture somehow affirmed your previous doubts on your almost four hundred years-worth of feelings for your best friend. You didn’t kiss him back with as much force as he did, even when he almost drew blood from biting your bottom lip or when he smoothly slipped his tongue in your mouth as his hands took hold of yours on the sides of the desk, but you thought a lot about him in the moment—mostly about how you were questioning your feelings for him prior to when he appeared out of nowhere.

It also definitely didn’t help that he kept whispering ‘I missed you so much’ in between gasps of air too. It still makes your heart melt to this day (and Jeongin disgusted whenever he passes by you and accidentally hears your thoughts. “Can you two please just stop being horny over each other all the time? It’s been 700 years.” “Yang Jeongin, get back here!”) 

You realized, as Hyunjin moved to trail desperate kisses down your neck, that maybe you did have a crush on your best friend and it was okay even if it was just because of the longing to see him after years or the loneliness of eternal life. You liked him a lot, maybe you even loved him as early as this moment you’re not even sure anymore but you’ve always been certain from that this very moment, you never wanted to be apart from him for too long.

But it still scared you after a while, even when you already felt assured over your previous qualms, and you unknowingly pushed him away because of this, right as he tugged on your clothes and snaked a hand up your dress. “Hyunjin, stop!” In a wave of fear, you pushed him away with an enchantment, making him fly all the way across the room until his back hit the opposite wall. “S-Shit, I’m so sorry, I—“

In response, you remember him shaking his head reassuringly. “It’s fine, don’t worry.” He assures you, his voice just barely above a whisper. “It’s just that I—nevermind, I should be sorry. I’m so sorry, Y/N...”

Before you could even say anything else, however, he vanished into thin air right in front of you, leaving you even more confused than before.

When you do actually meet Hyunjin and the others a month later, you couldn’t bring yourself to confront him about it somehow even when you were quick to notice that he was avoiding you after Minho proudly boasted to you that he started training Hyunjin to navigate other people’s dreams. Besides the fact that it made heat rise up to your face alarmingly that Changbin started joking about you trying to lure all vampires within the vicinity into sucking your neck dry, you also didn’t know how to approach Hyunjin in the case that you had to inevitably tell him your feelings. Though you had a clearer idea of your feelings then, you still weren’t ready to confess it to him yet.

So, reluctantly, you had to part ways again because of this, you coming up with a lame excuse to see your cousins all the way in Europe at the thought that you wanted to think your feelings through again while also giving Hyunjin his much needed space. You ended up leaving the group in 1763 somewhere in Shanghai, a hundred and nineteen years after the incident.

“Ah, I don’t think I’m suited for the coven life anymore.” You pointed out awkwardly at Hyunjin as you hugged him last at the ports. “It’s just—not the same, I guess. I think I have to travel on my own for a while...”

Even with the awkwardness, Hyunjin still hugged you tightly anyway and even planted a familiar kiss to your shoulder. “Write to me again, okay?”

“Always.” You assured through the frantic beating of your heart. You notice him catching your hand in between the two of you when you pull away from the hug, almost rendering you speechless. “I’ll see you when I see you. It’s just goodbye for now.”

Jeongin once spilled to you one day that of all the similar situations after that Hyunjin has let you go after seeing you again, he always thinks about this one in particular the most and how he should’ve asked for you to stay; and you hit the younger boy with one of your books in response for snooping. But still, it has also made you start wondering lately if things would’ve changed if you parted ways differently then.

“Yes, it’s goodbye for now.”

four hundred ninety-nine

The next two hundred and four years would then be spent in an unconscious game of cat and mouse between you and Hyunjin. Whenever Chan and Minho would let him, he would follow you by your letters around Europe and Africa and he would more often than not miss the opportunity of approaching. When he did manage to catch up with you, you would go to lunch with him and show him around the place you’re staying at until the tension eventually died off as you occupied yourselves with other things.

Hyunjin first saw you again in Crete in 1818 when you started to learn foreign forms of witchcraft, missing the chance to approach you only because you disappeared from his watch because he chickened out last minute from recalling your previous incident in his mind. He would then see you again in 1825 Austria, studying the stars with Chaeryeong and a friend, Yuna, until he missed you by a boat ride to Egypt, then again in 1861 Congo when he would got in the wrong carriage and somehow ended up in in Algeria.

You eventually noticed, of course, how his return addresses seemed to pattern yours but you never brought it up until you he first caught up with you in 1884 Spain, when you went to the same art exhibit and ended up talking for hours until the tensions from almost a hundred years before completely vanished. “Are you following me?” You asked him teasingly mid-conversation as the two of you observed the Spolarium. “You have accumulated wealth from 400 years and you spend it by following me?” 

Hyunjin froze instinctively, an easy giveaway from him in your years of knowing each other. “What? No! I’m just—ya, you’re not the only one who can like travelling!” He quickly denied until you giggled in amusement, making him confess everything truthfully later on over lunch. 

You then ended up dedicating two hours to recounting all the times you almost met, laughing at almost every one of them because of Hyunjin’s undeniable clumsiness. By the end of his tales, he’s pouting at all your teasing in defeat as he asked, “Can’t you really live with us again? We’ve all moved back in Korea, you know—well, except Seungmin since he’s back in his trying to get all kinds of educational degrees in the world phase again.”

You didn’t want to admit it to him then up until now but you’ve thought about the exact same thing countless of times in your travels. Learning new skills and travelling the world has always been something you thoroughly enjoyed, you are a traveler after all, but you also couldn’t deny that you’d miss seeing Hyunjin more than anyone else you’ve met in your whole lifetime.

Without you knowing, you’ve realized that somewhere in between the correspondences you’ve managed throughout the centuries and the frequent meetings around the world, you’ve completely fallen in love with your best friend. You were sure of it then. 

However, before you parted ways again three years later to head further West while Hyunjin had to hurry back East for sneaking out from Minho this time, you answered his question with, “Let me think about it.” 

And, surprisingly, he understood. When you wrote to him from Brazil six months later, he replies with a long letter detailing his adventures halfway across the world in New Zealand as well as Middlemist’s Reds pressed in between the papers—one you would scold him later on once you found out that they were extremely rare.

 “Where did you put those rare New Zealand flowers, by the way?” Hyunjin asked you just last week, almost as if he remembered at the same time as you. 

“It’s somewhere.” You mused absentmindedly over your cup of coffee, hand instinctively going up to fiddle with the pearls on your ears where you discreetly hid the flowers. 

six-hundred eleven

When you met Seungmin by chance in 1930s Thailand, you immediately asked him about one of the earliest models of the 35 mm film he acquired from his own travels and the photos he took. Since Hyunjin was in California with Jisung, Jeongin, and Felix while Chan, Minho, and Changbin stayed behind in Korea, Seungmin showed you how the film worked by letting you see the photographs he took of your friends, especially Jeongin and Felix who were still new to their family at the time but you’ve immediately welcomed as your little brothers. The photographs mostly depicted them candidly in their day-to-day and though you have countless of similar photos now in your own smartphone, you couldn’t help but tear up at seeing these photos in particular at the time. 

“Hey, don’t stain my photos now, the film’s expensive.” Seungmin chuckled as he patted your shoulders comfortingly with one hand while the other took the photos from your side of the table. “What’s wrong?” 

You sobbed into his shoulder that afternoon, attracting the attention of some passersby at the restaurant you had breakfast together at. “I-I, uh—I missed everyone.” You told him, the first time you ever confided in someone else these very thoughts. Not even Chaeryeong, whom you would stay with every five years or so, knew this. “It’s just—it’s so lonely now and I...I love travelling but it just feels empty now—”

“Then come home. Come home when you think you’re ready, we’ll all be waiting for you—Hyunjin will be waiting for you.” Seungmin finished your thought for you gently, momentarily removing his hand from your shoulder to separate Hyunjin’s photos from the pile. Passing them to you again, he then adds, “If it makes you feel better, you can keep his photos if you want but for a little request.”

You then left Thailand to live with your mother in India four years later with Hyunjin’s photographs tucked neatly in the pages between his letters you’ve collected over the years in an enchantment pouch, acquiring them from Seungmin in exchange for photographs of you he would pass on to Hyunjin later on. 

Along with the other photographs you would collect of Hyunjin and your other family and friends, these particular photos now line up almost all walls of your apartment in Seoul. 

Hyunjin, on the other hand, though you’ve never confronted him about it, keeps your photos in his wallets and at the back of his clear phone case. Every time someone from the art gallery where he works in would ask him about it, he would always say that he DIY-ed them with his grandparents’ film and a coffee staining technique he got from YouTube. 

six-hundred forty-eight

Your mother willfully passed away in 1967 by ingesting a concoction of poisonous herbs you reluctantly helped her make. She was 2,022 years old and surrounded by all of her daughters in her deathbed on that fateful Sunday morning—some of whom you’ve only met when you came to live with your mother again. Your relatives then came a week later for another 50 years of mourning and, as one of the elder daughters, you were tasked in helping cater to everyone in the time that you had to be secluded from the world in old rituals and traditions; thus, halting yet another plan of reuniting with Hyunjin. 

It impacted you greater this time, not only because your mother was the one who passed away but also because you’ve already planned on returning permanently to Korea and reunite with Hyunjin this time. After six hundred years, you’ve finally sorted out your feelings for your best friend and fifty more years of being apart suddenly felt too long with this. 

And, as if he had read your thoughts, Hyunjin visited you in your dreams on the night before you would enter into the fifty-year mourning period. Having gained more experience in honing this gift of his by this time, he somehow managed to fashion your dreams into happening against the backdrop of the familiar 1300s Korean landscape. 

You dreamt of approaching Hyunjin at a flower stall in front of a marketplace akin to when you actually first met. Instead of having his back turned to you to pick on the carnations, however, he was waving at you with his arms outstretched for a hug, hanbok and everything. 

“How did you do all this?” You asked in disbelief as you hugged him back, taking in all the detailed scenery from his shoulder. You knew that, in the real world, he was back in Korea by this time and helping Seungmin set up his own film company, easily giving away the dream nature of your meeting. Still, you touched all of the flowers and the fabric of his favorite red hanbok anyway, marveling at how his gift has grown since the last and only other time you experienced it. 

“Lots of practice.” He shrugged with a proud grin, reluctantly letting you go after to take a good look at you. “I didn’t do anything weird to practice though, I mostly just terrorized Jisung in his dreams.” 

You scoffed at him, hitting his chest playfully. Looking around again and even chuckling at how your dream was even filled with people, you then commented, “It’s beautiful.” 

“I thought you needed some cheering up after what happened with your mom.” He explained, picking up a handful of carnations from the stall. Passing them to you, you were quick to notice how he didn’t let go of your hand after, prompting you to encourage him by lacing your fingers together. “I’m so sorry again. I’m sorry I can’t be with you right now, too.” 

“It’s okay.” You assured him with a shake of your head, mustering up a smile. “Just reading your e-mails and receiving your photos were already comforting for me.” 

"I can hop on a plane right now, if you need me.” He offers only to receive more assurance from you otherwise. “Are you sure?” 

You nodded, finally letting go of his hand after. “I’m sure just...let me dream with you right now.” You confirmed, earning you an understanding nod from him. Smiling at this, you then asked, “So, what do you have for me here?” 

Hyunjin then led you around your dream for the entire night, happily taking you to places you frequented when you were still children. You ran around the palace grounds, recounted village stories, ate popular foods of your time period, and laid in the grass of the palace gardens until you had to leave for an early start of your day when you suddenly felt someone shaking you awake from the physical world. 

Reluctantly, you parted ways at the marketplace at the end of your dream. 

“See you in 50 years?” He smiled sadly at you as you bid your goodbyes, awkwardly standing in front of you with his hands on his back. “Take care of yourself, okay?” 

You nodded with a hum, a stray tear suddenly finding its way down your cheek. “I’ll come home in 50 years, I promise.” 

Hyunjin’s eyes widened at this, his mouth hanging agape as he stuttered, “W-Wha—?” 

Before he could even coherently form his thoughts, however, you’ve already reached up to his cheek for a kiss before disappearing, leaving him alone in his own thoughts. 

Before you could enter isolation with the rest of your family in the morning that followed, you then made sure to e-mail Chan and Seungmin instructions to arrange your flight back to Korea in 50 years, asking them to not tell Hyunjin towards the end of your long message. 

six hundred ninety-eight

You returned to Korea on February 18, 2017 just as Chan and Seungmin have arranged for you, moving into one of Minho’s old apartment buildings where you still live at present. Following their further instructions, you then spent a whole month visiting all of your friends in their respective homes all around Korea (even Jeongin whom you met right under Hyunjin’s nose by visiting him in their home while his roommate was away for work) with your money you’ve entrusted Changbin to manage for you until you returned. You made sure to meet Hyunjin last, timing your reunion right on his 719th birthday. 

Your closer group of friends threw him a surprise party in Gangnam on this year, renting an entire hotel building for yourselves and your other friends from all around the world. When you met Hyunjin that night, you had helped Felix bake and deliver his seven-tiered birthday cake for him, casting a spell on the candles so that they would explode in colorful fireworks and dust sprinkles all over the red velvet cake before they eventually fade. You eventually made your presence known to him when Jisung and Minho turned off the lights to the halls as he made a wish, standing next to him when he opened his eyes. 

“Happy birthday!” You greeted him with a sheepish smile, laughing nervously when he jumped back in surprise. 

Hyunjin, however, quickly recovered from his initial shock and lifted you up the ground easily, moving the two of you away from the cake so he could spin you around twice in a hug. “You’re here!” He exclaimed happily to your shoulders before putting you down, hugging you even tighter now that you’re stationary. “You came!” 

“I’ve actually been here for a month.” You confessed bluntly, hugging him back by his shoulders. Your friends all cooed and gushed around you, eliciting heat to rise up your neck again (especially when Seungmin took out his camera to take photos) but Hyunjin only moves you away from everyone, still hugging you close. “I, uh, I moved in Minho’s old penthouse and everything. I’m staying this time.” 

At your last revelation, only then did Hyunjin pulled away from you, his hands moving down to your elbows as his eyes widened in disbelief. “R-Really? You’re staying this time?” 

“Permanently.” You answered with a smile, chuckling when he releases a relieved sigh and turns to everyone, happily telling them of your plans to stay. “I told you I was coming home.” 

“That was what you meant?” He repeated, earning him a nod from you. With that, he then hugged you again. “I’m glad...finally.” 

You then spent the rest of the night catching up with everyone at the party but most especially the birthday celebrant himself whom you couldn’t seem to get off of your side throughout most of the night. You ate, drank, sang, and danced with until early morning, until Hyunjin pulled you away from the naturally dying festivities to watch the sunrise with him at the rooftop. 

“I wondered why you’ve rarely replied to my messages on social media lately.” He frowned at you once you’ve reached the rooftop, settling on a random bench with the perfect view of the rising sun. “You could’ve told me you already arrived! I wanted to show you the gallery I’m working in these days!” 

“I’m still getting used to social media!” You defended yourself with a chuckle, pinching his cheeks and pulling them up to a smile which immediately makes Hyunjin laugh. “And I wanted to surprise you! I planned it with Chan and Seungmin 50 years ago—actually, even way back with Seungmin when we met in the 30s.” 

Hyunjin raised an eyebrow at you with this. “Hm? You did?”

“You remember when Seungmin and I met in Thailand in the 30s?” You asked, Hyunjin nodding along in response. “Before we exchanged our photos, he sort of talked me into it. I figured that I was getting tired of travelling for a really long time and he assured me that I can come home when I want to...that I can come home to you and everyone else...” 

Next to you, Hyunjin smiled as you spoke, the side of his face glowing faintly in the oranges and pinks of the early sunlight as he sat with his body turned completely to you. When you trail off with your words, he then muses, “Yeah, you can always come home to me...I missed you so much.” 

“You always say that whenever we reunite.” You point out without any hint of malice in your tone, pulling your legs up to the bench and pressing them close to your chest. 

“Don’t you miss me too?” He frowned teasingly, poking you on your sides. 

“Of course, I missed you too. I missed you everyday when we’re apart.” You assured, shrugging. “It’s just...” 

When you turn to Hyunjin, your eyes widened when you realized that he has leaned in closer to you, pressing his forehead to yours when you finally meet his gaze again. “Can I confess something?” 

Speechless, you could only muster a weak nod then. 

“I’ve always missed you, even from when you first left me when we were younger because I’ve loved you even then.” He whispered just inches away from your lips. “I’ve loved you and waited for you for almost seven hundred years.”

You thought he’d kiss you after his declaration but he only looked up at you in anticipation after, as if he was expecting you to say something. Caught off-guard, you let a brief pause pass by first before replying, “I-If you’ve always had, then why did you let me go each time?” 

“Because you’ve always been a traveler.” He answered, slowly closing his eyes and leaning in again. At this point, it felt as if he was only waiting on you to lean in on your own accord, the realization knocking out the air in your lungs. “And I’ve always hoped that you’d come back to me forever when you wanted to, if you wanted to—and now here we are.” 

“Here we are.” You repeated slowly, finally closing the small gap between the two of you with your hands going up to his hair. 

Unlike when Hyunjin first kissed you centuries before when you were still unsure of your feelings, this particular kiss was slow and almost feathery against your lips but somehow it also felt similarly urgent and heavy, bearing all of your hidden emotions of seven hundred years. Hyunjin only deepened the kiss when you whispered ‘I love you’ to him when you first pulled away to catch your breath, smiling uncontrollably when you kissed him again. 

“I love you too.” He replies when you have to catch your breath again, pulling away completely this time so he can gaze down at you fondly with his hand on your cheek never leaving your side to pat your head affectionately. “Always.” 

Hyunjin didn’t ask you to be his significant other afterward, not even when he took you home, but you both agree that there was an unspoken agreement between the two of you that day, especially when he didn’t leave immediately after dropping you off, preferring instead to trap you in between himself and the back of your front door while peppering kisses all over your face.  

“Still not cool, though.” Jisung teases every now and then at present, making Hyunjin roll his eyes every time. “You could’ve at least been a little more romantic with a confession or something! You’re from the 1300s, for crying out loud! Didn’t you guys court people and stuff?!” 

“But we’re in 2020 now.” Hyunjin has resorted to replying to this lately, even doing as much as chucking something at the younger boy (often Seungmin’s baseball bat for some reason). “Anyway, I’ve known Y/N for 700 years. It’d be even more uncool when you say you’ve pined over each other for 700 years and have only been dating for a year.” 

“Yeah so better start now than never, ri—ow, Y/N! I’m trying to defend you and you hit me with a pan?!” 

Without anyone knowing, however, Hyunjin did formally asked you to be his significant other when the summer came, sending you all of your letters for him by the traditional post. The delivery man looked at you weirdly when he arrived at your doorstep, there were seven boxes full of old all kinds of envelopes and bundles of papers after all, but you only smiled sheepishly at him and tipped him extra. 

“Ya, why did you send me all of your letters?” You feigned complaint at Hyunjin once he arrived at your place and successfully helped you getting all the boxes in your living room. “The shipping company probably thinks I’m stealing museum artifacts right under their noses or something.” 

“I thought it’d be cute to do send it traditionally!” He pouted before pulling you down on your sofa next to him and opening the first box. “I didn’t even know it was gonna arrive today!” 

“What are we doing with all these anyway?” You asked, carefully picking up a random envelope. “You know some of these could break from the air, it doesn’t take a Chemist or a Curator to know that.” 

“Ah, yes, but I did got these scanned on a hard drive in case they do break! We have to keep up with the times, Y/N! I’m going to have to scan yours one of these days.” Hyunjin grinned proudly as he swiftly swapped your envelope for the chronologically correct one. “Now, we’re going to look through these letters in the right order!” 

As it turns out, Hyunjin had hidden his original unsent letters in between the letters you gave him, reading them aloud to you and using them to ask you to be his significant other. “We could’ve been dating ages ago!” He commented playfully in between the more intimate ones, giggling when you frowned or tear up in response. “Ah, Y/N, don’t cry please! Shh, it’s okay, baby, I’m reading these to you just how much I love you, okay? Don’t cry...”  

“T-That’s exactly why I’m c-crying!” 

“So, does that mean, you’re, you know, you’re saying—”

“You didn’t even have to go through all this trouble!” 

Hyunjin still teases you for crying then, mostly because he feels proud that you think he outdid Changbin’s lavish proposal to his fiancé in the Maldives with this gesture.    

seven hundred one

Though most of Hyunjin’s family of vampires have had and/or currently have their own history of relationships, Changbin is the first of Hyunjin’s coven who announced plans of getting married. His fiancé, Haseul, insisted; something about having waited 900 years because they weren’t ‘as lucky as some people.’ 

You know she’s subtly hinting at you, even going as far as winking at you from across the room when she repeated the words at rehearsal dinner earlier this evening, but you only rolled your eyes at her playfully, dismissing the thought. 

“Why did you even sleep for 900 years? I still don’t understand.” You asked her after once you’ve gotten her alone, sharing a bottle of champagne on the side of the dance floor while giggling at Jeongin and his date trying to out-fluster each other on the dance floor. The DJ Chan hired has long shifted the songs from lively EDM tracks to slower love songs so, with everyone assuming that her and Changbin are busy dancing together, no one would bother the two of you for a while. 

Haseul only shook her head as she chugged down champagne straight from the bottle, making you wonder if older vampires really just act as casual as she and Changbin do by default. “It’s really complicated stuff, the practice probably died down when you were born.” She waved her hands frantically in front of you, pretending to stumble after and laughing when you don’t fall for it. You’ve had enough experience living with the boys to know that vampires don’t get drunk with alcohol. “Anyway, that’s not the point! Point is, don’t wait for a sorcerer to curse you with ancient blood magic and make you sleep for 900 years before you decide on taking a big leap in a relationship like getting married! Do it now, especially now while wedding fashion still looks cute!” 

You only pouted at her, taking the bottle from her hands and refilling your glass. “You know how I feel about weddings.” You pointed out in a smaller voice, effectively turning her teasing smile into a serious thin line. “And it’s not like we actually need weddings. It’s just an old ceremony that doesn’t even hold up much for us since we’ll be spending the rest of forever with each other, anyway.” 

“Yeah, but...you know...” Haseul opened her mouth to counter your argument before pursing her lips at seeing your now downcast expression. “...Sorry, I...that was insensitive of me.” 

You glanced over at her for a moment, furrowing your eyebrows before mustering up a reassuring smile and a shake of your head. “I—no, it’s fine. It’s just—I respect weddings for people who want them...I think I might even want them for myself if things from the past didn’t turn out the way they did. Because of that, I don’t think I’ll be in one myself...maybe if Hyunjin wants to but I don’t know how he feels about marriage or how he feels with how I feel about it...does that make sense?” 

Haseul really wanted to tell you right there and then that Hyunjin personally asked her to ask you about it in exchange for him to tone down his groomsman’s speech at the wedding next week. Instead, she only slung a comforting arm over your shoulder. “I get what you mean. I wasn’t sure about how to bring up marriage to Changbin at first, too—being in a relationship even when I woke up a century ago.” She comforted you with a lighthearted chuckle towards the end, rubbing small circles on your shoulder blades. “But whatever you and Hyunjin decide to do together, I’m sure it’ll all work out in the end.” 

But still, the thought lingered at the back of your mind for the rest of the night, especially when Hyunjin asked you to dance later on. 

“What’s on your mind?” He asked you curiously once you’re facing him again after twirling you once. “You know you’ve had that same thinking look since you and Haseul started drinking champagne. What’s wrong?” 

You looked up at him from your daze, eyes widening momentarily as you processed his words. When you regain composure, you shake your head and answer, “N-Nothing, I’m just, a bit sleepy.” 

Hyunjin frowned slightly, slowing your movements. “Must be the punch, I knew we shouldn’t have let Felix put in that weird blood mix on it.” 

“There’s blood on the punch?” 

“Type AB, I think—”

“—What? Gross!” You scrunched up your nose in disgust, making Hyunjin laugh. 

“I was just kidding, at least now you’re awake!” He pointed out in between laughter before going back to being serious. “But seriously, what’s wrong?” 

You took a moment to respond, eventually settling for a sigh. “Haseul just talked to me about marriage...” 

“Oh.” Hyunjin mused out loud and you’re quick to observe the way his expression falters ever so slightly, as if expecting the worse out of your next words. “What did she say?” 

“She just told me again how marriage and other ‘big leaps in relationships’ need to be timed correctly or something.” You answered, pursing your lips in between. “So I told her that yeah, I agree, but I don’t know how I feel about it on a personal level.” 

Hyunjin’s gaze then softened from the corner of your eyes. “Is it because of what happened before?” He asked carefully, tucking the loose strands of your hair behind your ear. 

“A bit, yeah.” You nodded. “But if you’re—i-if you think otherwise, if you want to get married or something, then I’ll be okay.” 

“I’m only following you, Y/N.” He reminded you, halting the two of you from dancing altogether as he becomes much more sincere with his words. “Whatever you want to do, I’ll follow.” 

You smiled up at him appreciatively, lacing your fingers with his in between the two of you. “I was hoping it’d be the other way around, you know how indesicive I could be sometimes.” 

“But do you want to get married?” He asked nervously after, slowly inching the two of you away from the dance floor now and into a quieter area on the sides of the hall. “Or...anything of the sort?” 

“Maybe...I don’t know...” You frowned, more to yourself in frustration. 

But Hyunjin only nodded in understanding, patting your head before pressing a kiss to your temple affectionately. “It’s okay, I understand. Don’t beat yourself too much over it, okay?” 

- 

Now, a week later, while you and Hyunjin were spending the Saturday afternoon in his bed, he suddenly pulls you on top of him so you’re laying on top of his chest, taking out a single blue chrysanthemum from his bedside table. “I bought this last week and asked Jeongin’s new friend to preserve it with an enchantment.” He hurriedly explains before you could even scold him for suffocating a flower inside the drawers of his bedside table. “Hear me out first.” 

“What’s this for all of sudden?” You ask curiously, taking the flower and picking on the petals as Hyunjin then lifts you up with him while sitting up straight, moving you to straddle his lap. 

“I’ve just been thinking...mostly about what Haseul said.” He explains, his hand then moving over to something else in his bedside drawer. “...and, of course, she has a point, I’d take someone’s word for it especially if they’ve been asleep for a huge chunk of the years humans have been on Earth but I also know that we’re a little different from her and Changbin because of what happened in the past.” 

You’re immediately rendered speechless from the very start of his speech, even more when he finally finds the velvet box in his bedside drawer. Opening it in between the two of you, you wanted to laugh at the way an extra copy of the keys to his new apartment peeks out from the cushions supporting the main purpose of the box, a ring with a simple round cut diamond and two sapphires, but you end up crying first before chuckling, easing Hyunjin’s own nerves. 

“Is the key really that visible? I thought I hid that pretty well when Changbin and I picked this up.” Hyunjin pouts, briefly turning the box in his direction to examine it properly and take the key out before directing it to you once again with a chuckle. “Anyway, as I was saying, marriage is cool and all but it’s not like one of us is being chased by a psycho sorcerer like Haseul so we can definitely take our time if we eventually want to.” 

“But still, a little reassurance wouldn’t hurt so...will you move in with me?—or just wear the ring, come over more often, and maybe tell me you love me more than you usually do; that’s also fine.” 

You hit him on his shoulder with a laugh, making him lean his head back in laughter too at his own silliness. “You really aren’t that romantic when it actually comes down to it, Jisung was sort of right.” You muse out loud, taking out the key from the cushions. 

“Ya!” He protests, taking your hand anyway and sliding the ring on your finger. “If it was still the 1300s, I would’ve had to ask people’s approval, carved ducks, and everything and it would’ve taken forever! It’s been 700 years so cut me some slack here!”    

Still, no matter how much you laugh after, you say yes anyway but not without making him promise that he’ll re-do his ‘proposal’ again so Jisung would stop roasting him about it. 

“I will, I will,” He assures dismissively, pulling you in for a kiss. “when you’re actually ready to marry...or say cheesy vows in front of everyone, whichever you prefer.” 

“That’s going to take 700 more years.” You joke against his lips with a giggle, making him scrunch up his nose in disapproval. 

“Fine, I guess I can wait a little more.” 

[cotccotc]

🎧   heartbeats per minute ┆ scb

genre/s: producer!changbin x gn reader, angst, exes au

wc: 1.1k

warning/s: mentions of drug addiction (not within the context of the plot, but in a metaphor)

a/n: written for @districtninewriters​ writers’ room prompt !! the prompt this week was headphones so for some reason my mind said Producer!Changbin Angst :D kdsj enjoy !!!

headphones.

a beat-up pair of black leather headphones, worn from continual use. audio-technica. changbin hated them, but he refused to purchase a new pair. they were sentimental to him. special.

just like you.

when he moved in, he assembled his makeshift studio in the corner of your shared bedroom. it was a petite setup, equipped only with the essentials. a small desk he’d found at a garage sale, a twin set of speakers placed on either corner, an off-brand computer monitor connected to a macintosh harddrive, and a piano keyboard with eight drum pads. each pad had a sticker on it. he always used the same pads for certain sounds, and he kept track of each of them with a sticker so he wouldn’t forget. he never has. but they’re there just in case. he’d use the top left pad for hi-hats, the middle two for toms, the top right for snares, the bottom left for cymbals, the one beside it for sub basses, and the other two for miscellaneous sounds. you never had a clue as to what any of it meant. he’d tried to explain it to you a few times. but each time he did, you got distracted by the manner with which he spoke. he was always so passionate. he was one of those types of geeks who could go on about something for hours with the partial intention to teach, but sidetracked by the additive thrill of describing his passion. he knew you didn’t care about the technical things. he knew that all you cared about was him. he never did thank you for letting him talk too much.

figures.

he hated those headphones. the way they’d weathered on the outsides; the wire he’d have to snake around the desk in order to reach his speakers. it always seemed to be about an inch too short. it was all so unnerving for him. and yet, he wouldn’t budge. they simply worked too perfectly. you’d even offered to buy him a new, identical pair for your one year anniversary. but he insisted on keeping them. you understood why. but if something is broken, you always thought, why keep it? why let the sorry things get more cracked and torn when you could always get a new one? he believed that good headphones were hard to come by. he’d had a few other pairs in his life, but none of them seemed to work as well as these. hell, he even produced his first mixtape with them.

there was a song about you on there. he never told you. but you knew.

another key component of his studio setup was his microphone. he loved that thing. bought it off of a friend for half of its original cost. he always joked about how he’d “conned” the guy. but you just thought it was a friendly gesture. just like all the little things you’d do for him that went seemingly unnoticed. like when you cleared the dust off the tops of his speakers. sometimes, you left post-it notes on his desk after slipping out of bed to leave for work. he was always so tired. regardless of their physical condition and emotional implication, you owed it to those headphones for allowing you to get a good night’s sleep despite his owl-like rest schedule. “i’m proud of you,” the notes would often say. or “love you,” maybe. sometimes it was just a few hearts. and when you’d come home, they’d be gone. sometimes, so would he. you figured he simply read them, chuckled, and used them to write down spur-of-the-moment lyrics before crumpling them up and throwing them in the trash can he stored below his desk.

he collected them. every last one. but you never knew that.

other times, he’d be working when you came home. usually, that was a good thing. but not when he was having writer’s block. you could always tell. he’d be quieter at first… more somber. he wouldn’t turn around when you kissed him on the cheek, explaining the day you’d had and changing out of your work clothes. maybe he’d provide some commentary. it was unlikely, though. eventually, you’d become so fed up that you’d exit the room, slamming the door shut. and every single time, you cursed yourself for having such a small apartment. if only it was bigger, you thought, we could get along. it was a comforting ideology for a while. a placeholder for a much bigger, much more conclusive way of thinking. that would come later. too late, you realize now. whenever you finally decided on what to get delivered for dinner, he’d be grumpy. less quiet, more passive aggressive. from the other end of your small kitchen table, he’d scarf down his meal - chinese food, a burger and fries, microwavable ramen, what have you - with an occasional “could you pass the sauce” or “napkin?” and trudge back into the bedroom.

a few times, you’d wait until you knew he was situated before you sneakily turned the doorknob, peering in to watch him work. he couldn’t hear you. another subtle virtue of the headphones. every so often, he would groan to himself out of dissatisfaction. you hated seeing him like this. it’s as if the longer he stayed locked up in that room, the more suffocating it became on his creative spirit. and yet, if he ever felt your presence or had even an inkling of suspicion that he was being watched, he’d turn around, rip off the device, and accuse you of being nosy. 

you sold him the headphones. it was your first day working at the tech store downtown, as well as your first time meeting changbin. he was charming. sarcastic, almost. much less sullen and apathetic than he was when he left you. now, all you can do is stare at the set as it sits in its original packaging, collecting dust upon the bedside table. he left them here. neatly placed back in their original packaging. yours to keep. how generous of him.

it’s been a month. he’s got a new pair now. undoubtedly so. how else could he survive from day to day without a constant auditory stimulant pulsing through him? it’s as if he was a drug addict. you always came second to sonic substance. but you bet he’s got a new dealer now. you often wonder where he might’ve purchased them or what brand they might be. maybe the cashier who sold them to him was nice. or, better yet, maybe they were ugly.

you love these headphones. no matter how worn they’ve become. you understand them, and they understand you.

tattered, expendable, alone.

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