#it's so hard to find a recipe because theyre all like 'go out and buy 2 pounds of shrimp for the express purpose of making broth'

[nebulaad]

everyone pray for my shrimp broth 🙏

[the-s1lly-corner]

How could each Evil Adult do in a dinner date?

dinner date w/ various knd villains

i dont usually take larger group posts buuuuuut i was already planning on writing something like this and this was the kick i needed to get to it LMAOAOAOAO!! happy to see people still requesting knd even if my writing for it has slowed down a bit!

characters: father, knightbrace, cuppa joe, stickybeard, spankulot, toiletnation

notes: reader is gn, established relationship, admin did his best to make everyone unique with their settings- hard given theyre all dinner dates!

cws: none

father

if should come as a surprise to absolutely no one that he would use the fact that he has access to money to spoil you- get ready to be taken to some high end place to eat! if you need an outfit he even offers to buy you something nice

all things considered, he does try to make the night as perfect as possible and hes quick to agitate if something comes up that can derail those plans- example being your typical knd antics or something else entirely

provided nothing happens, the night is... actually pretty nice..

he feels nice being able to spoil you, if he knows you cant afford your half of the bill hes willing to pay it off

wears a bowtie over his shadow suit thing, it.. looks a little funny because it looks like its just been glued on

the type to give flowers before a date to set a tone for the night

knightbrace

obviously hes going to make you brush after you both eat but thats not exactly part of the date, now is it? i mean he can try if he can find a way to make it romantic- side note if you struggle with general self care knightbrace is your man to hype you up

moving on

he does his best not to comment on your food choices- not in a body shaming way of course, hes just extremely uber hyperaware of whats going on with your teeth- hes got a bit of fixation that kind of boarders on obsession but thats another thing for another day

asides from that, hes actually pretty normal! he doesnt do fancy high end restaurant, hes more comfortable in spaces that are more casual...

splits the bill with you- you can have dessert, hes fine with not having any

if theres anything else hes obsessed with that isnt teeth, its time. he always makes sure hes on time to meet with you, likely a trait from his days as a dentist in training- got to be on time for appointments!

spankulot

he offers to let you meet up with him at his home- assuming he has one... i like to think he lives.. somewhere... whether it be a cave somewhere or in some old creepy manor! vampire stuff, you know?

does his best to put everything together so he can impress you

you can see him doing the hand shakey thing if you catch glimpses of him working on things before he sets the table... hes so eager to please you its adorable

fancy, but without the pressure of having to conform to others and their standards- you're in the comfort of a home!

tailors the meal to what you enjoy, he definitely keeps multiple cook books on hand! hes got recipes!

talking a mile a minute about his day as well as how hes happy you were able to make it for your date, and he listens to every word when you speak

very attentive partner who does everything for you, sweet man. blorbo

cuppa joe

you guys dont get to go on dates often due to him being out on his coffee rigs for... long periods of time..

i believe i mentioned in a different post somewhere the he does try to make up for lost time by absolutely spoiling you and smothering you in his love and attention

loaded as well, that coffee money PAYS! he can afford to take you to some fancy schmancy place, but thats not really his style

its a bit predictable, but he takes you to a cafe to get a drink and some treats. its far more casual than father or knightbrace's idea for a date, but you cant deny that the coziness offers you a comfortable atmosphere to catch up

makes sure you get the highest quality coffee, wouldnt be surprised if he was the one supplying the specific cafe you two were sitting in

tells you about all his findings out on the rig and asks you if youve been up to everything, he offers to take you with him the next time he has to go out

stickybeard

i can see him taking you to that candy bar he was at in the black licorice episode! hope youre ready to get some toothaches because there... isnt much options for actual food... actually now that you think about, have you ever seen your boyfriend eat actual food? sure he sometimes goes to the villain bbq, but-

night outs with stickybeard are always full of energy and laugh, he makes sure youre having a good time and hes ready to call it a night if youre getting tired or otherwise ready to put an end to the social event

insists you do most of the talking, he thinks your voice is the sweetest thing ever... pun intended!

does his best to take you out every week or two, definitely takes you out when he successfully carries out an evil plan to rob a child or a candy shop

date nights rarely end with dinner, expect him to have another activity planned afterwards! even if its just sailing around the suburbs in his ship!

toiletnator

he either prepares something at his place or yours- or he takes you out to eat somewhere

who needs to dress up and sit at some posh place when you can just catch a movie and then grab something quick to eat?

sure its not the most.. traditionally romantic... but the simplicity of it feels just as charming as the other characters nights in my opinion!

makes sure youre having fun- he can sometimes get carried away with the things he wants to do that night, but he can pull himself back if he notices you're not having as much fun as he had hoped you would

offers to pay for everything even if he cant afford it- i... doubt he makes a lot of money given that hes not a very successful villain..

[shoyastars]

A Star Celebration

Hiya!!!~ welcome to the nsfw fanfic for today because! ITS RAY’S BIRTHDAY!!!! April 30th is our best man’s birthday!

Old man turning 33 hehe! >:D

Anyways I got a bit inspired off of @argyre169

Wonderful fanfic… ✨☕️👀

AHEM! I hope you all enjoy this cup of tea oh! Be warned this is an Nsfw version not a sfw, and I might be a bit rusty I have written nsfw before, but back then I was all “hehehe totally do that and this!” Without really thinking what the character would cannonlly do, OH RIGHT! Be sure that Ray isn’t my character, they belong to ConcreteParasite! Who made an absolutely beautiful and amazing game. Go check it out if you’re 18 or older it’s intended for 18 and up, if you’re a minor, GET OUT OF HERE!! We ain’t getting the creator or the game in trouble today you got that?

This will be an oc x character sooo yeah.. >:)

✨But anyways, Happy Birthday Ray!✨

Let’s begin!

Mistin knew today was a special day, it was Ray’s birthday. That and it’s been everywhere on social media as of late. Unfortunately due to the NAHA knowing today’s a special day for ‘Binary Star’ Ray was called into work. However Mistin wouldn’t allow this chance to go to waste, they decided to make something special for him, he’s probably able to buy anything he wants due to his usual hero work, So Mistin got out some stuff and started sketching, painting and putting in final touches, when they were done they smiled at the work they’ve done. Mistin looked at the time, Ray still wasn’t home yet. That’s when they had the idea to try and make something, sure they’re cooking skills weren’t as good as his but they could try. They weren’t sure if it will work out in their favor, but they weren’t going to give up so easily, they’ve been in the villain world and got out barely with a scratch….. well… almost without a scratch… but hey what’s the worst that could happen?

.

.

.

“Gah! Geez how many times am I gonna make things fall over today.” Mistin caught the baking powder before if fell, due to it being on the edge. Mistin didn’t think about how much of a hassle baking was for them, especially doing it right… Mistin wasn’t sure how long they were in they’re apartment’s kitchen for… (Ahem 6 hours) they tried to think of what Ray would like or try finding a recipe, heck even perfecting it… it was honestly hard for them not to feel nervous they might screw up horribly…. Even causing them to trip and knock things over… luckily they didn’t fall with anything in hand so far.

Mistin groaned in frustration as they weren’t sure if they were going to get it done at all correctly without messing up, they were confident in their skills but however when it comes down to something they can’t determine will go badly wrong or perfectly right. They never cared this much before so why now? Well…. It’s because Ray gave them the chance to love romantically again… not to mention how they were able to set boundaries, discover and experience some thing’s normal couples do at least…. But most importantly…. Actually feel loved and not used like…. They’re last relationship….

They shake they’re head to snap out of they’re thoughts and focus, if anything it won’t be perfect but it’s decent at least they hope. Soon Mistin would be so wrapped up in Theyre own little cooking mayhem that they wouldn’t hear the door open and close. It was Ray.

“Star, I’m back.” Ray stretched but didn’t get a response. They we’re starting to worry a bit, until they heard Mistin mumbling out curses in the kitchen, they walked out to see Mistin getting annoyed at another failed attempt to make something, Ray noticed the recipe, and realized that Mistin choose a difficult recipe that is not very easy to make, causing him to smile a bit at them and try not to laugh at how angry they’re getting over a single recipe. “GAH! Fuck sake! What does it take to make a recipe actually go right!? Ugh!”

Mistin put Theyre hands to they’re face and turned away to breath, moving they’re hair out of they’re face, only see Ray in hero uniform, trying not to laugh at them. “Oh… um… hi…” Mistin didn’t know weather to be embarrassed or ashamed over getting frustrated over a recipe going wrong. “Hi, struggling with something?” He says crossing his arms and leaning to the side. Mistin felt their face go a bit pink from pure embarrassment. “W-Well I was just trying to make something so….”

“A difficult recipe?”

“What?”

“The recipe is difficult to make, yeah it will take trial and error but I’m sure you’ll get it in at least…. A couple of days if you’re dedicated to making it?” Mistin sighed and admitted defeat, setting themself on the kitchen floor, then Ray joined with them setting themself down beside them. “I’m sorry…” Ray gave a concerned look, he gently started rubbing their back to comfort them. “Sorry? For what?”

“Doing this… all by myself… possibly making you worry…. this day was supposed to be about you and…. I can’t even realize a stupid recipe is going to be too difficult for me to make…. You even had to go into work on you’re birthday…. I just want… to make sure today was going to you special…. like you did when it was my birthday….. I suck at this…”

Ray didn’t realize that they were willing to do that for him, but that’s how love goes am I right? (Ahem! Anyways) Ray got up and just threw out the failed attempts causing Mistin to look up at him. “Ray what are you doing?” Ray only smiled and lend a hand to lift them up. “Well I was hoping you weren’t going to continue with this recipe and do another one that’s more simple together.” Mistin was hesitant but nodded. Ray smiled and place a kiss on their cheek, causing Mistin to laugh a bit push his face away. “Hey I was only giving you a kiss.”

“Well you gotta kiss me without that mask of yours mr. ‘Binary Star’ haha!” With that Ray looked at Mistin with so much love in his eyes, taking his mask off, right now he knew Mistin truly only wanted to celebrate his birthday… not as Binary Star, but as Ray. He loved that about them. “There you are… Happy Birthday Ray..” with that Mistin and Ray shared a passionate kiss. Ray didn’t wanna pull away but however Mistin pulled away with Ray only leaning in for more only to snap back to reality. “I think you should hop in the shower. I’ll clean up this mess.”

“Why not join me then?” Ray smirked as Mistin was tempted, they did say the next time he’d invite that they’d take up the offer. That’s when Mistin sighed and smiled. Turning to him. “Sure, I did promise that I’d take you up upon you’re offer the next time, and it seems like a good day to finally accept.” Mistin would take his hand and lead him into the bathroom, Ray already a bit excited yet couldn’t help but feel a bit surprised they actually accepted this time. “What about the mess?” Mistin smiled as they started taking off their clothes, not caring if he’s looking or not anymore. “I’ll clean it up later, for now I believe ‘we’ should both get cleaned up.~” They then turned on the shower, Ray sighs as he shakes and then chuckles a bit. He finally decided to take off his hero uniform, Mistin was the first to step in waiting for him, soon Ray followed afterwards. The nice water hitting their skin as they were in there.

——————————————————————————

Ok! This is where the spice begins! ✨☕️👀✨

______________________________________________

Soon Ray would have Mistin against the shower wall as he kissed them passionately, he was so glad that they accepted the invitation now. Mistin’s arms around his neck, soon their hands were in his now wet hair as his kiss trailed down to their neck, Mistin couldn’t help but let out quiet moans of pleasure, only fueling Ray further to continue on. Soon his hand traveled down to touch every part of Mistin’s body. “You are so… fucking perfect…” a husky whisperer into Mistin’s ear as Ray’s hand goes between their legs. “If you want me to stop, stay it and I’ll stop. If not… I’ll make sure you’re going to feel real good.” Mistin nodded eager, they soon moaned as Ray’s fingers were pumped into and out, causing Mistin to let out shaky moans of pleasure as Ray smiled at how much they were enjoying this. The water making it even easier for him to move his fingers around.

“Ray..-“ before they could speak further he kissed them, definitely adding tongue. He pulled his fingers out, Mistin was confused but understood quickly what his intentions were next. Mistin was uncertain because they never had sex with a guy before, if anything it was entirely new.. but they weren’t exactly a virgin in the slightest. Ray noticed the uncertainty and gently held they’re face, looking into they’re eyes. “If you don’t want to continue that’s completely fine, don’t feel forced to do what I want because it’s my birthday.” With that they knew Ray read their mind without consent but in this case they didn’t care at this point. They didn’t wanna run away or be scared to do things anymore, they’re going to go through with it. “I want to, Ray please…” with that Ray kissed them, soon Mistin felt both pain and pleasure, Ray whispering reassurances and even holding they’re hand fingers linked together, soon he started to move, Ray never letting go of they’re hand as his other hand gripped their side. Mistin biting their lip for a bit and then going back to moaning with pleasure, feeling every inch of him inside them feeling good with every thrust he made. Ray couldn’t take his eyes off them, he wanted to see every bit of them of every moment. He knew he wanted them from the very start, but not in a way he only wanted they’re body, but having them, they’re trust, they’re love. He couldn’t ask for a more better gift than that. He then shared a kiss with them he doesn’t get enough of them, if anything he loves them more than anything, if he were to choose the city or them, he’d pick them. Mistin couldn’t have asked for a better partner for this moment, feeling so much love from Ray it feels like they were to explode in any given time. They weren’t used to such affection for not being given any in a long, long time… they wanted to get the know the true Ray and now after all this time they still wanted to know more. They’re so glad they didn’t give up on him, though some people say two broken people are only bound to tear what’s left apart, they gave it a shot with Ray and yet here they are, loving each other. Mistin grips some of Ray’s hair, even wrapping his arms around him again. Moaning his name heck even more, saying they love them. To them this was more than just simple sex in the shower, to them it was like giving a piece of themselves to him and trust him wholeheartedly. Soon Ray while kissing them, pulls away and leans in hear they’re ear. “Mistin, I love you..” he says as Mistin knows they’re both nearly finished. “I love you to, oh god Ray!” Wrapping they’re arms around him tightly as he sped the pace up a bit, and then finally stop.

They stayed there for a bit soon Mistin finally looking at Ray out of breath and soon smiling at him, Ray didn’t need to read they’re mind to know how much they loved him. Sharing a passionate kiss afterwards.

——————————————————————————

End of the spice. ✨🤭✨

——————————————————————————

Once out of the shower Ray as expected brought over clothes. Mistin grew used to it, Ray only smiled at them as they were changing into some comfortable clothes, the day is nearly over. Mistin cleaned up the kitchen with Ray, soon he’d find a recipe that was more easy to understand and simple. Of course… why didn’t they think of that? Soon as they were making something he noticed Mistin’s sleeves were fully up, they didn’t usually have them all the way up because they showed the scars of when they used they’re ability as a villain. “What wrong?” Mistin asked a bit concerned. Ray looks at their arm, the cuts were big. They did explain how their ability worked, the deeper the cut the bigger the effect, the longer the cut the longer it lasted. “I thought you were uncomfortable showing you’re scars.” Mistin smiled and just moved some hair out of their face. Ray then knew right there he’d reached a point where Mistin isn’t ashamed to show they’re scars around him. Without warning Ray goes up behind them taking their hand and then kissing the scars on Mistin’s arm, making Mistin’s face a bit pink. “Hey! Don’t make me cover them up again old man!” Ray only laughs as he got used to them calling him old man long ago. Soon after awhile they ended up finishing the recipe also cleaning up a bit. Then Mistin decided to make something extra, ending up getting frosting on their face. Ray chuckled as he wipes a bit of it away with his thumb. At this point Mistin had already put their sleeves back down since what they made was practically done and they’re arms were getting marks from their own sleeves which was uncomfortable. “Ray wha- haha!”

“Gee Star getting messy again on my birthday?”

“Hey! Of course I’m gonna make a bit of a mess when cooking. Haha!” With that Mistin stuck out their tongue and Ray only smiles, he was having a good time. Soon afterwards they ate the food. “Oh shit! Right almost forgot.” Mistin gone over to their bedside table and grab the thing they made. Mistin gave it to them. Ray looked at it and saw two silhouettes in a starry sky holding each other. “I decided to describe how felt around you, in a form of I guess artwork… I don’t usually do it but… Ray… you make me happy. Even if the world we know is fucked up… at least we found each other… right?” Ray didn’t know what to say, but he place it to the side and kiss them. When he pulled away he held them close. “I’m glad I saw you that night.. I’m very lucky you know that?” Mistin leaned into him. “I’m lucky to have finally met you in the café.”

With that Ray spent the night, they were called in the next day, but Mistin knew he’d be back, after all. They were both caught in a pre ordained dance….

They met.

.

They collided….

.

They orbit around each other.

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.

.

Thank you for reading this.

✨Happy Birthday Ray!✨

✨Hopefully I did good at writing this, it’s been long while since I’ve written actual Nsfw Ehehe… as alway! Comments are open if there are any criticisms you’d like to give. I’ll be sure to keep it in mind for the future! Bye bye!✨

[mysmedrabbles]

RFA Reacting to a Muslim MC

requested: twice by the same anon :P

a/n: note that I am not a muslim nor am i a hijabi, so if i get a detail wrong, im super sorry and please pLEAse let me know so it can be fixed!! :D this was really interesting to write, enjoy!! 

would you like to support this Muslim MC? want more specific WoC MC’s? buy me a coffee to support my dangerous coffee addiction so i can do em for ya!

warnings: n/a

-hyped mod alex

Jumin

-his strong faith in Christianity was admirable, his ideals set in stone as he abided by them; but of course there was the smallest bit of apprehension in getting to know him, how would he react to someone with ideals different than his?

-he was never one to announce his faith publicly, he still isn’t, however he likes taking with you about your respective religions, sitting on the balcony of his penthouse taking in the cool night air,,, wine for him and Aryana’s Halal Cola shipped all the way from Montreal for you

-orders you the finest hijabs for you to wear, most of them custom made exactly the way you love them, elegant and refined. he also learns the level of modesty you tend to wear your clothes, buying you occasional stunning gala outfit that he knows you’ll both love and feel comfortable with

-you own the most stunning abayas

-absolutely takes you with him on his trips to the middle east. he’s an avid believer in learning about your own roots, and especially if you have family there, he’ll more than certainly take you, going together to see all the sights, take private tours of museums and enjoy life

-makes Chef learn specific halal recipes, and is more than willing to import any food you want from other countries that you cant get in Korea

-learns Arabic in about a year flat,, of course his Korean accent hits heavily, but its so sweet hearing him carefully pronounce sentences to your parents and or relatives

-on eid al-adha he’s aware of the old tradition to sacrifice animals and share with the poor, needy and family; so as a compromise he decides to donate 300 lbs of meat to various homeless shelters and soup kitchens. both you and him going down to help with transport, hand every box to the people, a sort of community service combined with observing a time old tradition.

-comes down with you to the night prayer at the mosque during ramadan, and even though he stays near the entrance and the garden out front, hearing the prayers coming from the inside and seeing all the people that you know and love around you, smiling and having a good time, it makes him happy

Jaehee

-she grew up catholic, lives catholic; but this isn’t to say she’s close-minded to other religions,, she always loves learning more, especially if its about you, who she loves with all her heart

-when youre cuddling, she likes fiddling with the edge of your hijab, just feeling the material and knowing you’re there makes any day of hers better, no matter how hard it may have been

-you being muslim doesn’t have much of an impact, she’s respectful to your beliefs, and even puts in halal foods in the cafe

-this is, of course, after months of her experimenting with different recipes, often finding her in the kitchen at midnight, flour on her face and apron dirtied, sleeves rolled up in a frenzy as she mutters under her breath 

-shes so proud to finally present the finished deserts and foods to you!!

-one time you used one of her woven silk scarves as a makeshift hijab when all of yours were in the wash and she almost cries seeing how pretty you are in her stuff (the scarf is yours now)

-always interested in your religion, and she likes learning the differences between the traditions she was raised with and the ones you were

-during Ramadan, the two of you keep the shop open later for anyone wanting to eat after the sun has set, figuring that no one had to break their fast alone if they didn’t want to

-she gets up very early to prepare Suhoor for you in the morning, a simple oatmeal with dates, blueberries, grapes, almonds and honey

-likes to read her own books aside you while you read the Quran and do your morning prayer, its often the most peaceful part of your day, just having a clean and quiet space as you both enjoy each others company while also doing your own morning routines

Yoosung

-sweet boy, he knows very little of,, well any religion to be honest, and outside of 10th grade history, his knowledge on Islam as a whole is quite limited

-always asking questions about your traditions

-he reads the Quran at some point, wanting to understand you better,, and even though it takes him a long time (mostly due to having to re-read the passages over and over again to understand what was going on), but he’s devoted to learning about your culture

-he drives/walks you to the mosque, but doesn’t leave,, he’s not sure if he can go in, so instead he opts to walk around the area, enjoying the park and waiting for you to come back out so you can walk/drive back together

-he learns so many recipes specifically for you everything from mawmenye, harira, and moroccan krsa to berber bread

-he loves spending time with your family, he loves the sense of community and the celebrations that take place in your household, specifically during religious holidays

-he legitimately cries when you eventually decide to go to Mecca, leaving for hajj, because he knows he cant be with you for around a week and a half,, he can’t help it, he’s so sad he won't be able to see you for more than a week

-he’s so used to stopping all gaming and quieting down devices during salah, that even when you’re not around he still stops for five minutes at the designated times, mostly out of habit, but it also serves as a break from working, studying or gaming

-Lisa,, lisa loves your prayer mat, always trying to knock it down from its rolled up position next to the couch and sleep on it, so instead yoosung buys her a smaller prayer rug to lay on and its the cutest thing you've ever seen

Seven

-although he’s always been the one to mention his own faith in Catholicism, he’s also the one to be most curious about other faiths.

-he likes hearing you talk about the way you grew up, specifically hearing you talk about Islam and asking questions about traditions and practices you have to do

- “wait y/n!!,,, are honey buddha chips halal???”

-if theyre not, he opts to buy pringles in bulk instead. hes going to binge eat chips and damnit he wants you to join him!!! 

-when it comes time for you to perform Salah, he makes sure that you have total peace, even stopping his typing for the duration, letting you connect fully with Allah and your spirit

-since theres little to no sunlight that appears in the bunker, he makes a simple little app that alerts you when the times of prayer come, pre-dawn, noon, afternoon, sunset, and night, using the bells that are primarily heard in mosques as the ringtone for the app

-if anyone dares to mess with you or insult you in any way, Defender of Justice 707 will send a nasty virus their way, because theres no way anyone is getting away with hurting his angel

-its canon that he knows Arabic, and often times, when you can’t go to sleep he’ll sing to you in the language, and although his singing isn't the best, focusing on the strength and passion in his words, the almost comforting way he sings, it sends you calmly to sleep

Zen

-incredibly respectful of your religion and the fact that you’re Muslim

-he sets himself to learn everything he can about your faith and things he might have to change or alter in his own life to be respectful of the way you live yours

-he cuts down on alcohol. a lot.

-this isn’t to say he stops drinking altogether but he certainly cuts down, only having a beer or two in the fridge for emergencies

-bursts in one day, phone in hand as he wheezes, leaning on the couch for support, “y/n ArE wE hALaL dATiNg Or?”

-if you believe that sex should be saved to be only after marriage, he respects that, if not,, well he respects that too

-WILL spend extra money on an abaya from serenity scarves as a gift, just for you being you

-his only goal is to make you as comfortable as you can be, and he Will Not Stand for islamophobic comments directed towards you, but in most cases he won't even let them reach you, cutting off interviewers before they can say anything with a stream of gushing about how perfect you are, and smoothly taking you to the other side of the room if he thinks someone is looking at you, shooting them a mean glare before looking back at you and smiling, whispering something to make you laugh as you guys walk away hand in hand

-respect is this mans middle name, he’ll meet your family the second you start officially dating, making sure to make a good first impression, the second, and third, and fourth impressions

-likes going shopping with you, and is constantly in awe of how stunning you can make anything look, going to the little middle eastern kiosk in the mall to buy food

-he’s such a shameless fan of those cute matching couples outfits, and his heart bursts everytime your hijab matches the colour or pattern of his shirt or jacket

[starcrossedkitsune]

Well in that case, MC and Luca, please and thank you! 😚

No problemo!! ❤

Who hogs the duvet

MC does 😹 but Luca is fine with that because hes not a big blanket person the wierdo

Who texts/rings to check how their day is going

Luca, definitely. He's like that mothering friend you know and love and he'll blow up the MCs phone with emojis to brighten their day

Whos the most creative when it comes to gifts

Technically the MC, Luca would honestly just gift the MC their favorite snacks while MC would go out of their way to make/find a meaningful gift for Luca

Who gets up first

You serious? Neither of them do, hell theyd stay in bed all day cuddling and well probably doing NSFW antics before Briar or Cordelia came pounding on the door to get thier butts out of bed 😹

Who suggests new things in bed

Luca and hes like really confident when he does, but ends up going off to sulk if it goes wrong or MC says no

Who cries at movies

"I'm not crying your crying!" -MC 😹

Who gives unprompted massages

Neither, but they're always trying to sweet talk each other into giving one

Who fusses over the other when theyre sick

Luca most definitely. MC was his best friend before they started dating so he always worries about them, and Briar but this isnt about her, and will drop everything the moment he finds out MC is sick/injured

Who gets jealous easiest

Luca, he acts all flirty and confident but MC is his if theyre dating no one else is even allowed to try and be flirty with MC he will shut that down quick

Who has the most embarrassing taste in music

Im pretty sure this would just be a game between them to try and have the most embarrassing playlists 😂 Luca would probably lose bc the MC has a way of finding some really out there songs

Who collects something unusual

MC collects POP! Funkos and Luca is just like why????? Not really unusual but he doesnt see the point in them

Who takes the longest to get ready

Luca, only for the sheer fact his hair has to be juuuuust right. Kidding, he just runs his hand through it like twice and hes good to gonow outfits on the other hand if he dresses sporty he just threw that stuff on but if he tries to look nice (anything that isnt gym clothes 😂) then he will sit there for 30 minutes to an hour trying to find something unless MC helps

Who is the most tidy and organized

Nooot Luca, neither is the MC but the room would be such a chaotic mess that MC still knew where everything was and Luca just ends up asking them to find everything

Who gets most excited about the holidays

Luca, coming from a big family the holidays are important for him because it is a time of being with loved ones. Halloween is his favorite though, he's been trying to convince MC to do a couples costume with him

Who is big spoon/little spoon

They take turns 😹 only because MC is adamant about being little spoon but usually ends up being big spoon

Who gets competitive when playing games and/or sports

For video games oh my god MC does and it can get pretty hilarious, Luca gets competitive about sports but thats because thats his domain but he doesnt get too bad with it not like how MC gets with video games

Who starts the most arguements

Luca does only because he over worries and the MC just kind of goes with the flow so he just kind of goes off on a tangent about hoe they almost could have died

Who suggests they buy a pet

Both of them 😂 Luca would run a shelter out of his dorm if he could get away with it, he just loves animals so much

What couple traditions do they have

They call each other wierd nicknames to try and get a reaction from one another. Also at least once a week they cook together in the kitchen and try recipes from all over the world

What tv shows do they watch together

Cop shows, thier current lineup is Rizzoli and Isles(for the 3rd time), The Rookie, and Elementary

What other couple do they hang out with

Oof I didnt think about this 😂 I guess depending on if i do make this a thing again Castiel/Zac or Gwen/Castiel Gwen/Cordelia. Either Castiel ships because hes the more laidback twin and Zac once he opens up a bit more they're pretty fun together and Zac really likes to do war reeenactments and theyd play cards against humanity together. Gwen would be the main reason, she is one of the few people who could get Cordelia to just take a chill pill and try to have fun for once and the group would do mountain climbing/fun runs together which would make Luca die of happiness and probably just make MC die 😂😂

How they spend time together as a couple

They watch movies/tv shows together, MC would begrudgingly agree to do sporty stuff with Luca but still have fun doing some of them (having thier abilities helps 😉), and play video games together. At least once a week though they have to cook together its thier little tradition

Who made the first move

Theyre both flirtatious idiots when it comes to one another but it was the MC who made the first move. Yeah Luca is flirty with them before they date but he didnt think the MC would take him seriously so when they reciprocated he was just dumbfounded

Who brings flowers home

MC would try but then have to throw them out the window because pollen 😒 doesnt make sense since you know Luca spends the majority of his days outside ANYWAYS but nope no flowers within 2 feet of Luca or hes a big sneeze fest

Who is the best cook

Luca, i mean he works really hard to since he grew up with being told one day he would be a cook/manager for the family restaurant and he definitely wants to impress MC with his culinary prowess

[linddzz]

What advice would you give to two 20 year olds who are trying to survive and get to financial stability, but are barely making ends meat despite both working two jobs?

So I looked at this for a while trying to think of a good response that could actually mean something and decided I have to admit my own priviledge may make me not in the best position to give good advice here.I've been through the struggle of barely affording rent and trying to make ends meet while working. But I always had a backup. My upper middle class parents were super supportive and understanding on how much the economy fucked and continues to fuck our generation. They never paid rent for me and left me to my own a lot but were ok when I ended up having to move back in with them for a bit.I can't give practical advice because I haven't lived the experience enough to have that practical advice to give. And I totally welcome followers who have advice to give and know better than me how to get through those hard early years.What I can say is stick with those who support you. Friends and family and whatever you have. Online or real life, help each other even with just finding small bright points. Because what I did get good at was making a space my own with little money or room.Food is a basic necessity and being able to cook can save money if you can do it right. There's also the joy of making food and sharing it with someone to get one of those bright points that you may need in life. There are tumblr blogs for low budget cooking and im blanking on the name, but there are cook books designed for food stamp levels of budget. If mental or physical issues get in the way, try @lowspoonsfood for good easy, quick recipes that tend to be cheap.One pot pasta is amazing. You put a few cans of stuff with whatever pasta you choose into a pot and it all cooks together. Look em up.If you want greenery, save some money to buy a couple airplants. They dont need soil or special potting. You can even glue them to neat sticks or stones for decoration. Just soak them almost fully in water a couple times a week or so, get them some indirect sunlight, and theyre a nice easy and inexpensive boost of color. Also when they grow they shoot out baby airplants that you can spread around!Succulents can be good but do need a specialized soil to do their best. I have a couple in old washed out tin cans that are going strong after multiple years and moves.Don't let go of dreams entirely, but dont see being unable to reach a dream as failure. Understand that dreams can be on hold for a while as life runs it's course. There isn't a set age to get things done. Just surviving now to try more later is a good plan. Sometime you may need to choose between the dream and personal stability. Both are perfectly valid options, neither is wrong. The correct answer is whichever you think is more important to you.Or even if you dont HAVE a dream, working just to work and get income is perfectly fine. Don't let inspiration-porn make you feel guilty for deciding to focus on surviving over the messages of "only do your passion and dream!!"Keep your eyes up and aim up, but not to the point where up seems impossible and you get stuck. Sometimes you have to force yourself through the day. And even if current jobs are hell, try learning skills to try and move up to management positions (if you arent already there). Getting up to manager can make it easier to get work in a place you may like more.(Also I have heard that Walgreens as a whole, generally treats workers better than a lot of other chain retail joints. Trader Joes and Ben N Jerries are also good retail places for employees. I'm sure there's more, that's just what springs to mind!)

[themoneybuff-blog]

Four Fermented Foods I Love to Make at Home

A few years ago, my wife bought me a copy of The Art of Fermentation by Sandor Ellix Katz. She knew that I loved to experiment with foods and unusual recipes and figured Id enjoy digging into this book, especially since there was a long tradition in my family of making homemade sauerkraut. She was absolutely right. Making fermented foods and beverages has developed into a low-cost hobby of mine over the last few years. Ive tried and failed and succeeded at making all kinds of strange fermented foods: some that were delicious, some that were not so delicious, and some that were decidedly strange. After many, many experiments over the last several years, Ive come to realize that there are really four things that come out on top in terms of things Id recommend to others. These four items are often being made in our home. They perfectly balance flavorful and useful with being relatively easy to make. (I really enjoy a few other things, but theyre a lot of work keeping a sourdough starter alive comes to mind here.) Here are the four fermented food items that I think offer the most bang for the buck in terms of making them yourself. Theyre easy to make, dont require much equipment, and use pretty inexpensive ingredients. If you make these even twice, youve paid for any equipment compared to buying these foods in the store; if you make them several times, youre saving a ton of money versus buying them in the store. Sauerkraut Sauerkraut is simply finely chopped fermented cabbage. You simply take a head of cabbage, chop it up into small bits, add some salt to it, mash it around until a lot of the liquid comes out of the cabbage, and then store that juicy salty cabbage in a jar for a few weeks. Thats literally all you do. Sauerkraut is something of a family tradition for me, as my father used to make large batches of it every year in a giant crock in the garage when I was growing up. My preferred easy way of doing this is to use a large wide-mouth quart Mason jar and put a simple air lock fermentation lid on top. Those are the only two things you need that you might not already have in your kitchen (besides the cabbage and salt). You might also want some glass fermentation weights, but theyre not essential, merely very useful. The process is about as simple as can be. Go to the store and buy a head of cabbage weigh it while youre there and note the weight in pounds. When you get home, take the cabbage head and remove a few of the big outer leaves from the head and set them aside for the moment. Take the rest of the cabbage and chop it up into fine pieces I usually aim for pieces that are roughly the size of a small matchstick and I discard a small portion of the stem. To that chopped cabbage, add one tablespoon of salt for every two pounds you weighed in the store. Mix the salt in and let it sit for about 15 minutes, then start squeezing it with your hands or with a blunt instrument. Your goal is to try to get as much water out of the cabbage as you can, and the salt will naturally help with this; you dont want to discard the liquid, but make a salty soup out of the cabbage. Do this for about 10 minutes or so. Youll be left with a lot of salty liquid and a bunch of squeezed cabbage. Fill a jar about 3/4 full with the wet cabbage, then pour on enough of the liquid so that the cabbage is fully submerged. Take one of the leaves, cut a circle out of it thats a little wider than the size of the jar, then stuff that cabbage circle down on top, pushing it down below the liquid level. If you have a fermentation weight, put that on top of the cabbage leaf to keep it weighted down so that its less likely that the sauerkraut will push up above the liquid level. Then, pop on the fermenting lid and let it sit for three weeks or so. You might see a bit of white mold on the very surface of it if any of the cabbage is exposed, and thats okay you can just toss that part but if you see any other colors, your liquid wasnt salty enough. After three weeks, its ready to eat! You can serve it as a condiment or as a side dish with many different meals. You can also experiment with future batches by adding other ingredients to the mix, such as shredded radish, caraway seeds, shredded beets, jalapeo peppers, or minced garlic. Heres a great recipe for homemade sauerkraut with more details. Kombucha Kombucha is fermented sweet tea. The fermentation process gives the tea a bit of a distinct flavor its still sweet, but it has a hint of pleasant sour to it as well. I personally like to mix it with a small bit of fruit juice. Again, making kombucha is pretty easy. The only permanent equipment you need is a gallon glass jar, a clean cloth to cover the opening, and a rubber band to secure the cloth in place. If you want to individually bottle it and try to make it fizzy, youll need a few resealable bottles I use these for all kinds of homemade beverages, including kombucha. Youll need to buy a bottle of kombucha at the store this is the starter you can use to get your own batch going. I highly recommend the popular GTs Kombucha brand for this because Ive personally verified that you can get kombucha started from it. Dont worry about which flavor to buy. This part is going to sound crazy, but what youll want to do is simply open up the bottle of kombucha, cover the opening with the cloth, use a rubber band to secure it, and just leave it out in the open at room temperature. Im not kidding in the least. Youll want to leave it for about a week or two. What will happen is that a small layer will form at the top of the liquid. It might look more like a small ball, or it might be a layer along the top both are fine, and the one that forms depends entirely on the type of kombucha you have and the ambient air in your home. That layer or ball is called a scoby, and its a key ingredient in making kombucha. This can take a couple of weeks, so dont sweat it if you dont see any changes after several days. Note that, as with any fermentation, if you see anything that looks hairy or black, theres a problem and you should toss the mixture, but this is a rare occurrence and generally only happens when youve messed up a step. Once that little ball or layer has formed, give it another few days, then youre ready to make your first batch. Youll need 14 cups clean water, 6 bags of black tea, 1 cup of sugar, and your bottle of kombucha. First, simply boil the water in a large pot on the stove. When it reaches a boil, remove it from the heat and put the tea bags in. Let them steep for five minutes or so, then remove the tea bags and let the entire mixture cool to room temperature over a few hours. When its at room temperature, add the cup of sugar, stir it thoroughly, then pour it into the clean gallon jar. Then, pour the contents of the kombucha bottle right into the jar, scoby and all. Stir it for a minute or so, then put the cloth over the top of the jar and rubber band it in place. Let it sit for a couple of weeks. What youll notice is that the scoby will grow a lot larger over this time. Thats a good thing. When you decide its time to try it, youll want to remove the scoby and two cups of the liquid from the mixture. What you may find is that the scoby separates into multiple pieces or layers; thats fine. Keep at least one scoby and the liquid. The rest of the remaining liquid is kombucha thats ready to drink be aware that its not carbonated at all and at room temperature. If you want to carbonate it and add a fruit flavor, add two cups of your preferred fruit juice to the jar, mix it thoroughly, then fill some of the resealable glass bottles mentioned earlier. These will carbonate over the next several days; leave them out on the table and check one of them each morning and evening by simply opening one of the bottles quickly and closing it. When you open one and hear a small popping sound, then carbonation is happening and I would recommend moving them to the fridge and drinking them in the next few days. The scoby and two cups of liquid that you saved can serve as the starter for your next batch. Just repeat the above process, using your scoby and starter. If the scoby is getting really thick and hard to handle, you can easily divide it into smaller pieces; this allows you to start making multiple batches at once. Heres a great kombucha primer from Joy of Cooking. Fermented Pickled Vegetables There are a number of ways to pickle vegetables. Some of them involve vinegar as a way to introduce acetic acid to encourage the pickling process. Others simply use salt and allow the pickling process to occur naturally. In both cases, you can wind up with a delicious treat. I personally like many different fermented pickled vegetables. Cucumbers are an obvious choice, but pickled carrots and pickled cauliflower and pickled peppers and pickled radishes are all delicious. I also like mixing vegetables in this process. My process is simple. I just use a wide-mouth quart jar and a fermenting lid, as described in the earlier section about sauerkraut. I also use a glass fermentation weight or two, as noted earlier. I cut up four cups of vegetables that I want to pickle and put them in the jar Ill cut pickles into spears or carrots into smaller long strips or trim down cauliflower florets or cut peppers into strips. If I want to add some spices, I add them now for example, I like to add peppercorns to many vegetables and dill to pickles. Youll want to leave at least an inch and a half of space at the top of the jar, if not more. Then, I add three tablespoons of salt to the water and stir it thoroughly, then add that salty water to the vegetables, covering them completely in the salty liquid. Ill put a fermentation weight or two on top to keep the vegetables down in the brine, then put on the fermentation lid and the ring. Then, I just let them sit on the countertop or in the cupboard for a few weeks. I usually taste the vegetables at about the two-week mark and then weekly after that until Im happy with them. As I noted earlier, this is a delicious way to prepare cucumbers, cauliflower, peppers, carrots, radishes, and beets, among other things. For most of them, you dont need to add any spices at all, though I like adding peppercorns and dill to pickles at least. If youd like to know more about making fermented pickled vegetables, this is a great guide. Kimchi Kimchi is a Korean condiment that is made up of a variety of shredded vegetables. I view it as being a long lost cousin of sauerkraut, because the two often remind me of each other. Kimchi has a particularly strong flavor, however, and thats due to some of the more unusual ingredients. The process for making kimchi is pretty similar to making sauerkraut, actually. Youll need the things mentioned earlier (wide mouth quart jars, fermentation lids) as well as a blender, as the sauce in kimchi is made up of more than just water and salt. I like to make several jars of this at once, so what follows is a recipe for enough kimchi to fill quite a few jars. Start with a head of cabbage, three large carrots, and a handful of green onions. Chop the cabbage head until its reduced to thin strips, then chop the carrots into long matchsticks. Add half a cup of salt to these vegetables in a big bowl and mix it thoroughly with your hands, then add enough cold water to cover all of the vegetables. Let this sit for an hour or two, then strain off the salty water and save it. Meanwhile, chop off the green portion of the green onions (and save that green part), then dice them. Put the onions, half a cup of chili powder, 20 garlic cloves, four inches of peeled ginger root, a tablespoon of fish sauce, and four tablespoons of white miso paste in a blender and puree it. Itll be a very thick paste add water and re-blend it until its like a thin pancake batter or a milkshake. Take the green parts of the onions, chop them into small pieces, then toss the cabbage-carrot mix, the green onion pieces, and the paste together in a very large bowl. Mix everything as thoroughly as you can; you can/should use your hands, but wear gloves! Then, just start cramming this stuff into the jars, pressing it down as much as you can. Ideally, some of the thick liquid should move up to the top, covering the vegetables. If this doesnt quite happen, add just a small bit of the saved salty water until the vegetables are thoroughly covered. I advise you to keep the top of the liquid about an inch and a half from the top of the jar. Put a fermenting lid and a ring on each jar and leave them out at room temperature for three days; theyll probably start to bubble. When you start to notice bubbling, open each jar and press the vegetables down with a knife, releasing the bubbles. Do it again each day after that. After three days (at least two of which involve noticeable bubbling), put them in the fridge on top of a plate or a pan of some kind, because sometimes this stuff can bubble up and overflow the jar. This stuff is delicious, but it has a very very distinct flavor that can be a love-it-or-hate-it kind of thing. Im in the love-it camp. Heres a more detailed version of the above recipe. Final Thoughts In all four of these cases, these recipes are far less expensive than buying the equivalent amount of that item in the store, and the homemade version is usually tastier because its fresher and youve selected the ingredients to match what you like. However, these food items arent for everyone. I encourage you to try these things before making batches of them at home to make sure youll even like the end product. I really like all four of these things, but I know that even within my own family, some of these things are not well liked. If you find these kinds of foods and procedures interesting, I highly recommend the book The Art of Fermentation by Sandor Ellix Katz as a great reference. There are a number of good books on fermentation out there, but that was the one that really set the hook in terms of my own interest and discovery. Good luck! Now, if I could just figure out how to keep a sourdough starter alive Read more by Trent Hamm: https://www.thesimpledollar.com/four-fermented-foods-i-love-to-make-at-home/

[adambstingus]

6 Guys Youll End Up Dating When Youve Been Single For Too Long

I’m writing this post from my bed.

I’m un-showered, even though I came home from CrossFit three hours ago.

I’m slugging back red wine and crushing a party size-serving of chips and salsa.

I turned my phone on silent an hour ago, just so I would stop checking to see if the guy I like has responded to the text I sent earlier.

Needless to say, I dont think you get much more single than this.

There are nights when I rejoice in it, and there are nights when I sulk in it.

Tonight, its the latter.

But as I sit here, elbow-deep in a bag of Tostitos and knuckles clenched around a topped-off glass of wine, I cant help but be grateful for this single life Ive been living for almost a year now.

Its an unexpected and for me unwanted learning experience.

I say its “unwanted” because Im the relationship type.

Ive never had a one-night stand (nor will I ever).

I like commitment.

Dating gives me anxiety because I never know what to say or do.

Should I text him first? Will he text me?

Whats the right emoji to use? Should I even use an emoji?

Let me screenshot this and send it to all my friends to see if its okay.

What should I wear?

Unwanted or not, Im on one hell of a self-learning curve.

I think its so important for every woman to have this bittersweet journey, especially in her20s.

Im learning when to keep my guard up and when to let it come crashing down.

Im learning how to be patient.

I’m learning what I like and what I dont.

Im learning so much about myself because Im finding time for myself.

Im trying new things.

I’ve joined CrossFit and hot yoga, and I quit some unhealthy habits that were crippling my self-esteem.

Ive tried tons of new restaurants completely free, thanks to first dates.

But besides learning about myself, Im learning a lot about the dating pool.

Let me tell you this: When they say there are plenty of fish in the sea, it’s true.

But the ones you want to catch are really, really hard to find. They’re borderline nonexistent.

Ive met tons of guys ranging in age, profession, personality, height, hobbies, etc.

However, after dozens and dozens of dates and hundreds of right swipes that have amounted to nothing, Ive been able to put a label on just about every single one.

Ive boiled them down to six main categories:

1. The Ex

When one relationship ends, its so easy to look back at a previous ex and question why that relationship didnt work out either.

Call it delusion or curiosity, but it always seems like a logical first step when youre single.

So, if youre both single, why not give it another whirl?

Its comfortable. Its fun.

Its your opportunity to double-check hes really not the one who got away.

When my high school sweetheart found out that my recent ex and I had ended things, he came back into my life the same way he left it: like a tornado, leaving a path of destruction in his wake.

Without getting into details for his sake (and his girlfriends, whoops), the verdict was we broke up for a reason.

Thats always a validating feeling.

In the words of my inner spirit animal, Taylor Swift, we are never, ever getting back together. Like, ever.

But hey, like I said, it cant hurt to double check.

2. The Non-Committal Charmer

Hell tell you youre exclusive, but he won’t ever make you his girlfriend.

He’ll monopolize your free time to ensure you dont spend time with anyone else, but he wont commit.

Youll never meet his friends or family, so dont even try.

He is in complete control of the relationship because you let him be.

His charm, wit and personality compel you to stay.

His goal is to perpetually keep your relationship in a hostage situation.

You want to see other people, but you dont want to put what you have at risk because its comfortable and fun.

Youre convinced that at some point, hell come to his senses.

He wont.

So, youre going to want to quit while you’re ahead. Dont waste any time.

3. The Egotistical PrickWho Plays On Your Heartstrings

Is it rough to call these people sociopaths?

Theyll do everything they can to make you like them in a short period of time.

Theyll cook you your favorite dinner, buy you nice wine and compliment you on the weird things you wish people would notice.

They make it so easy to let your guard down.

Then, one day, theyll just stop talking to you.

Theyll give you some bullsh*t excuse like theyre just “not ready for a relationship right now, or they really like you, and “it scares” them.

No, you just needed an ego trip. Or, you needed to get laid.

Or both.Whatever.

These types of guys are the reason all women are a little hesitant, confused, broken and yes crazy.

There are plenty of them out there.

4. The Former Frat Guy Who Just Cant Let Go Of College

In my opinion, these guys are the absolute worst.

This is mainly because they dont even realize theyre being the absolute worst. The naivety isnt at all charming.

He doesnt have to be a frat guy. Hes just the guy who loves college.

He cant grow up.

He loves his boys and beer pong more than he loves his job. He knows more about chugging beers than investing in a 401(k).

He has no idea how to start or maintain a conversation. His career path is questionable.

He most likely has the life goal of being a stay-at-home dad.

Thats what she said jokes are far too common, and he finds them far too funny.

While I personally havent gone on a single date with one of these guys, they exist in the masses.

So good luck, female young professionalsof America who thought men matured after college.

AsI say to my dad, “Im looking for the smartest idiot over 25.”

5. The One Youre Just Not That Into

These, for me, are the most common.

Then again, I think they’re common for everyone.

If we were into every person we met, there wouldnt be anyone special, right?

But sometimes, you really want to like someone.

He hasa great job. You love hisfriends and family. He’s funny.

You have everything in common. You can text all day and never run out of things to talk about.

Your Snapchat exchanges keep you laughing all day long.

He’s proud of you. He cares about you.

Youre even a perfect match (according to the stars).

But, you just arent into this person, no matter how hard you try to be.

While relationships take effort, you should never force yourself to fall for someone because you think you’d be great together.

It’s a recipe for disaster and heartbreak, and that’s one sad situationI won’t ever willingly walk into.

So when you find yourself in this kind of mess, you have to break the ice.

It’s unfair to string the other person along when he’s clearly feeling all the emotions you wish you could.

When you’re dating someone youre not into, but whom you love as a human being, breaking the ice is a double-edged sword.

You both end up hurt and bummed.

6.The One

Every person I talk to tells me the one will walk into my life when I least expect it.

It wont be because I spent my entire lunch break swiping left and right (mostly left).

It wont be because I asked my co-workers, friends, family and acquaintances if they know someone else whos completely exhausted by the routine dating scene.

It certainly wont be because I got drunk enough to get the nerve to walk up to a guy and strike up a random conversation.

No way, not me.

Im told Ill meet someone in a sweet form of serendipity.

Ill accidentally spill my coffee on him at Starbucks.

Well bond over the fresh produce at Trader Joes.

Well be at the same bar for happy hour.

Something will happen.

When that something does, in fact, happen, all those heartbreaks, mistakes, moments of weakness and feelings of guilt will wash away.

You won’t question whether your guard should be up or down. What or when to text won’t be a thought.

Everything will slip into place.

Because as everyone always says, “When you know, you know.”

So until then, my advice to every single woman out there is this: Be a lady.

Be fearless, but not careless.

Be willing to love and unafraid to get hurt.

Put yourself out there. Learn to love yourself.

Discover hobbies that fill your time.

But this is the most important piece of advice of all: Never ever settle for any of the five who come before “the one.”

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/2017/09/27/6-guys-youll-end-up-dating-when-youve-been-single-for-too-long/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/165810005762

[samanthasroberts]

6 Guys Youll End Up Dating When Youve Been Single For Too Long

I’m writing this post from my bed.

I’m un-showered, even though I came home from CrossFit three hours ago.

I’m slugging back red wine and crushing a party size-serving of chips and salsa.

I turned my phone on silent an hour ago, just so I would stop checking to see if the guy I like has responded to the text I sent earlier.

Needless to say, I dont think you get much more single than this.

There are nights when I rejoice in it, and there are nights when I sulk in it.

Tonight, its the latter.

But as I sit here, elbow-deep in a bag of Tostitos and knuckles clenched around a topped-off glass of wine, I cant help but be grateful for this single life Ive been living for almost a year now.

Its an unexpected and for me unwanted learning experience.

I say its “unwanted” because Im the relationship type.

Ive never had a one-night stand (nor will I ever).

I like commitment.

Dating gives me anxiety because I never know what to say or do.

Should I text him first? Will he text me?

Whats the right emoji to use? Should I even use an emoji?

Let me screenshot this and send it to all my friends to see if its okay.

What should I wear?

Unwanted or not, Im on one hell of a self-learning curve.

I think its so important for every woman to have this bittersweet journey, especially in her20s.

Im learning when to keep my guard up and when to let it come crashing down.

Im learning how to be patient.

I’m learning what I like and what I dont.

Im learning so much about myself because Im finding time for myself.

Im trying new things.

I’ve joined CrossFit and hot yoga, and I quit some unhealthy habits that were crippling my self-esteem.

Ive tried tons of new restaurants completely free, thanks to first dates.

But besides learning about myself, Im learning a lot about the dating pool.

Let me tell you this: When they say there are plenty of fish in the sea, it’s true.

But the ones you want to catch are really, really hard to find. They’re borderline nonexistent.

Ive met tons of guys ranging in age, profession, personality, height, hobbies, etc.

However, after dozens and dozens of dates and hundreds of right swipes that have amounted to nothing, Ive been able to put a label on just about every single one.

Ive boiled them down to six main categories:

1. The Ex

When one relationship ends, its so easy to look back at a previous ex and question why that relationship didnt work out either.

Call it delusion or curiosity, but it always seems like a logical first step when youre single.

So, if youre both single, why not give it another whirl?

Its comfortable. Its fun.

Its your opportunity to double-check hes really not the one who got away.

When my high school sweetheart found out that my recent ex and I had ended things, he came back into my life the same way he left it: like a tornado, leaving a path of destruction in his wake.

Without getting into details for his sake (and his girlfriends, whoops), the verdict was we broke up for a reason.

Thats always a validating feeling.

In the words of my inner spirit animal, Taylor Swift, we are never, ever getting back together. Like, ever.

But hey, like I said, it cant hurt to double check.

2. The Non-Committal Charmer

Hell tell you youre exclusive, but he won’t ever make you his girlfriend.

He’ll monopolize your free time to ensure you dont spend time with anyone else, but he wont commit.

Youll never meet his friends or family, so dont even try.

He is in complete control of the relationship because you let him be.

His charm, wit and personality compel you to stay.

His goal is to perpetually keep your relationship in a hostage situation.

You want to see other people, but you dont want to put what you have at risk because its comfortable and fun.

Youre convinced that at some point, hell come to his senses.

He wont.

So, youre going to want to quit while you’re ahead. Dont waste any time.

3. The Egotistical PrickWho Plays On Your Heartstrings

Is it rough to call these people sociopaths?

Theyll do everything they can to make you like them in a short period of time.

Theyll cook you your favorite dinner, buy you nice wine and compliment you on the weird things you wish people would notice.

They make it so easy to let your guard down.

Then, one day, theyll just stop talking to you.

Theyll give you some bullsh*t excuse like theyre just “not ready for a relationship right now, or they really like you, and “it scares” them.

No, you just needed an ego trip. Or, you needed to get laid.

Or both.Whatever.

These types of guys are the reason all women are a little hesitant, confused, broken and yes crazy.

There are plenty of them out there.

4. The Former Frat Guy Who Just Cant Let Go Of College

In my opinion, these guys are the absolute worst.

This is mainly because they dont even realize theyre being the absolute worst. The naivety isnt at all charming.

He doesnt have to be a frat guy. Hes just the guy who loves college.

He cant grow up.

He loves his boys and beer pong more than he loves his job. He knows more about chugging beers than investing in a 401(k).

He has no idea how to start or maintain a conversation. His career path is questionable.

He most likely has the life goal of being a stay-at-home dad.

Thats what she said jokes are far too common, and he finds them far too funny.

While I personally havent gone on a single date with one of these guys, they exist in the masses.

So good luck, female young professionalsof America who thought men matured after college.

AsI say to my dad, “Im looking for the smartest idiot over 25.”

5. The One Youre Just Not That Into

These, for me, are the most common.

Then again, I think they’re common for everyone.

If we were into every person we met, there wouldnt be anyone special, right?

But sometimes, you really want to like someone.

He hasa great job. You love hisfriends and family. He’s funny.

You have everything in common. You can text all day and never run out of things to talk about.

Your Snapchat exchanges keep you laughing all day long.

He’s proud of you. He cares about you.

Youre even a perfect match (according to the stars).

But, you just arent into this person, no matter how hard you try to be.

While relationships take effort, you should never force yourself to fall for someone because you think you’d be great together.

It’s a recipe for disaster and heartbreak, and that’s one sad situationI won’t ever willingly walk into.

So when you find yourself in this kind of mess, you have to break the ice.

It’s unfair to string the other person along when he’s clearly feeling all the emotions you wish you could.

When you’re dating someone youre not into, but whom you love as a human being, breaking the ice is a double-edged sword.

You both end up hurt and bummed.

6.The One

Every person I talk to tells me the one will walk into my life when I least expect it.

It wont be because I spent my entire lunch break swiping left and right (mostly left).

It wont be because I asked my co-workers, friends, family and acquaintances if they know someone else whos completely exhausted by the routine dating scene.

It certainly wont be because I got drunk enough to get the nerve to walk up to a guy and strike up a random conversation.

No way, not me.

Im told Ill meet someone in a sweet form of serendipity.

Ill accidentally spill my coffee on him at Starbucks.

Well bond over the fresh produce at Trader Joes.

Well be at the same bar for happy hour.

Something will happen.

When that something does, in fact, happen, all those heartbreaks, mistakes, moments of weakness and feelings of guilt will wash away.

You won’t question whether your guard should be up or down. What or when to text won’t be a thought.

Everything will slip into place.

Because as everyone always says, “When you know, you know.”

So until then, my advice to every single woman out there is this: Be a lady.

Be fearless, but not careless.

Be willing to love and unafraid to get hurt.

Put yourself out there. Learn to love yourself.

Discover hobbies that fill your time.

But this is the most important piece of advice of all: Never ever settle for any of the five who come before “the one.”

Source: http://allofbeer.com/2017/09/27/6-guys-youll-end-up-dating-when-youve-been-single-for-too-long/

from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2017/09/27/6-guys-youll-end-up-dating-when-youve-been-single-for-too-long/

[jimdsmith34]

6 Guys Youll End Up Dating When Youve Been Single For Too Long

I’m writing this post from my bed.

I’m un-showered, even though I came home from CrossFit three hours ago.

I’m slugging back red wine and crushing a party size-serving of chips and salsa.

I turned my phone on silent an hour ago, just so I would stop checking to see if the guy I like has responded to the text I sent earlier.

Needless to say, I dont think you get much more single than this.

There are nights when I rejoice in it, and there are nights when I sulk in it.

Tonight, its the latter.

But as I sit here, elbow-deep in a bag of Tostitos and knuckles clenched around a topped-off glass of wine, I cant help but be grateful for this single life Ive been living for almost a year now.

Its an unexpected and for me unwanted learning experience.

I say its “unwanted” because Im the relationship type.

Ive never had a one-night stand (nor will I ever).

I like commitment.

Dating gives me anxiety because I never know what to say or do.

Should I text him first? Will he text me?

Whats the right emoji to use? Should I even use an emoji?

Let me screenshot this and send it to all my friends to see if its okay.

What should I wear?

Unwanted or not, Im on one hell of a self-learning curve.

I think its so important for every woman to have this bittersweet journey, especially in her20s.

Im learning when to keep my guard up and when to let it come crashing down.

Im learning how to be patient.

I’m learning what I like and what I dont.

Im learning so much about myself because Im finding time for myself.

Im trying new things.

I’ve joined CrossFit and hot yoga, and I quit some unhealthy habits that were crippling my self-esteem.

Ive tried tons of new restaurants completely free, thanks to first dates.

But besides learning about myself, Im learning a lot about the dating pool.

Let me tell you this: When they say there are plenty of fish in the sea, it’s true.

But the ones you want to catch are really, really hard to find. They’re borderline nonexistent.

Ive met tons of guys ranging in age, profession, personality, height, hobbies, etc.

However, after dozens and dozens of dates and hundreds of right swipes that have amounted to nothing, Ive been able to put a label on just about every single one.

Ive boiled them down to six main categories:

1. The Ex

When one relationship ends, its so easy to look back at a previous ex and question why that relationship didnt work out either.

Call it delusion or curiosity, but it always seems like a logical first step when youre single.

So, if youre both single, why not give it another whirl?

Its comfortable. Its fun.

Its your opportunity to double-check hes really not the one who got away.

When my high school sweetheart found out that my recent ex and I had ended things, he came back into my life the same way he left it: like a tornado, leaving a path of destruction in his wake.

Without getting into details for his sake (and his girlfriends, whoops), the verdict was we broke up for a reason.

Thats always a validating feeling.

In the words of my inner spirit animal, Taylor Swift, we are never, ever getting back together. Like, ever.

But hey, like I said, it cant hurt to double check.

2. The Non-Committal Charmer

Hell tell you youre exclusive, but he won’t ever make you his girlfriend.

He’ll monopolize your free time to ensure you dont spend time with anyone else, but he wont commit.

Youll never meet his friends or family, so dont even try.

He is in complete control of the relationship because you let him be.

His charm, wit and personality compel you to stay.

His goal is to perpetually keep your relationship in a hostage situation.

You want to see other people, but you dont want to put what you have at risk because its comfortable and fun.

Youre convinced that at some point, hell come to his senses.

He wont.

So, youre going to want to quit while you’re ahead. Dont waste any time.

3. The Egotistical PrickWho Plays On Your Heartstrings

Is it rough to call these people sociopaths?

Theyll do everything they can to make you like them in a short period of time.

Theyll cook you your favorite dinner, buy you nice wine and compliment you on the weird things you wish people would notice.

They make it so easy to let your guard down.

Then, one day, theyll just stop talking to you.

Theyll give you some bullsh*t excuse like theyre just “not ready for a relationship right now, or they really like you, and “it scares” them.

No, you just needed an ego trip. Or, you needed to get laid.

Or both.Whatever.

These types of guys are the reason all women are a little hesitant, confused, broken and yes crazy.

There are plenty of them out there.

4. The Former Frat Guy Who Just Cant Let Go Of College

In my opinion, these guys are the absolute worst.

This is mainly because they dont even realize theyre being the absolute worst. The naivety isnt at all charming.

He doesnt have to be a frat guy. Hes just the guy who loves college.

He cant grow up.

He loves his boys and beer pong more than he loves his job. He knows more about chugging beers than investing in a 401(k).

He has no idea how to start or maintain a conversation. His career path is questionable.

He most likely has the life goal of being a stay-at-home dad.

Thats what she said jokes are far too common, and he finds them far too funny.

While I personally havent gone on a single date with one of these guys, they exist in the masses.

So good luck, female young professionalsof America who thought men matured after college.

AsI say to my dad, “Im looking for the smartest idiot over 25.”

5. The One Youre Just Not That Into

These, for me, are the most common.

Then again, I think they’re common for everyone.

If we were into every person we met, there wouldnt be anyone special, right?

But sometimes, you really want to like someone.

He hasa great job. You love hisfriends and family. He’s funny.

You have everything in common. You can text all day and never run out of things to talk about.

Your Snapchat exchanges keep you laughing all day long.

He’s proud of you. He cares about you.

Youre even a perfect match (according to the stars).

But, you just arent into this person, no matter how hard you try to be.

While relationships take effort, you should never force yourself to fall for someone because you think you’d be great together.

It’s a recipe for disaster and heartbreak, and that’s one sad situationI won’t ever willingly walk into.

So when you find yourself in this kind of mess, you have to break the ice.

It’s unfair to string the other person along when he’s clearly feeling all the emotions you wish you could.

When you’re dating someone youre not into, but whom you love as a human being, breaking the ice is a double-edged sword.

You both end up hurt and bummed.

6.The One

Every person I talk to tells me the one will walk into my life when I least expect it.

It wont be because I spent my entire lunch break swiping left and right (mostly left).

It wont be because I asked my co-workers, friends, family and acquaintances if they know someone else whos completely exhausted by the routine dating scene.

It certainly wont be because I got drunk enough to get the nerve to walk up to a guy and strike up a random conversation.

No way, not me.

Im told Ill meet someone in a sweet form of serendipity.

Ill accidentally spill my coffee on him at Starbucks.

Well bond over the fresh produce at Trader Joes.

Well be at the same bar for happy hour.

Something will happen.

When that something does, in fact, happen, all those heartbreaks, mistakes, moments of weakness and feelings of guilt will wash away.

You won’t question whether your guard should be up or down. What or when to text won’t be a thought.

Everything will slip into place.

Because as everyone always says, “When you know, you know.”

So until then, my advice to every single woman out there is this: Be a lady.

Be fearless, but not careless.

Be willing to love and unafraid to get hurt.

Put yourself out there. Learn to love yourself.

Discover hobbies that fill your time.

But this is the most important piece of advice of all: Never ever settle for any of the five who come before “the one.”

source http://allofbeer.com/2017/09/27/6-guys-youll-end-up-dating-when-youve-been-single-for-too-long/ from All of Beer http://allofbeer.blogspot.com/2017/09/6-guys-youll-end-up-dating-when-youve.html

[allofbeercom]

6 Guys Youll End Up Dating When Youve Been Single For Too Long

I’m writing this post from my bed.

I’m un-showered, even though I came home from CrossFit three hours ago.

I’m slugging back red wine and crushing a party size-serving of chips and salsa.

I turned my phone on silent an hour ago, just so I would stop checking to see if the guy I like has responded to the text I sent earlier.

Needless to say, I dont think you get much more single than this.

There are nights when I rejoice in it, and there are nights when I sulk in it.

Tonight, its the latter.

But as I sit here, elbow-deep in a bag of Tostitos and knuckles clenched around a topped-off glass of wine, I cant help but be grateful for this single life Ive been living for almost a year now.

Its an unexpected and for me unwanted learning experience.

I say its “unwanted” because Im the relationship type.

Ive never had a one-night stand (nor will I ever).

I like commitment.

Dating gives me anxiety because I never know what to say or do.

Should I text him first? Will he text me?

Whats the right emoji to use? Should I even use an emoji?

Let me screenshot this and send it to all my friends to see if its okay.

What should I wear?

Unwanted or not, Im on one hell of a self-learning curve.

I think its so important for every woman to have this bittersweet journey, especially in her20s.

Im learning when to keep my guard up and when to let it come crashing down.

Im learning how to be patient.

I’m learning what I like and what I dont.

Im learning so much about myself because Im finding time for myself.

Im trying new things.

I’ve joined CrossFit and hot yoga, and I quit some unhealthy habits that were crippling my self-esteem.

Ive tried tons of new restaurants completely free, thanks to first dates.

But besides learning about myself, Im learning a lot about the dating pool.

Let me tell you this: When they say there are plenty of fish in the sea, it’s true.

But the ones you want to catch are really, really hard to find. They’re borderline nonexistent.

Ive met tons of guys ranging in age, profession, personality, height, hobbies, etc.

However, after dozens and dozens of dates and hundreds of right swipes that have amounted to nothing, Ive been able to put a label on just about every single one.

Ive boiled them down to six main categories:

1. The Ex

When one relationship ends, its so easy to look back at a previous ex and question why that relationship didnt work out either.

Call it delusion or curiosity, but it always seems like a logical first step when youre single.

So, if youre both single, why not give it another whirl?

Its comfortable. Its fun.

Its your opportunity to double-check hes really not the one who got away.

When my high school sweetheart found out that my recent ex and I had ended things, he came back into my life the same way he left it: like a tornado, leaving a path of destruction in his wake.

Without getting into details for his sake (and his girlfriends, whoops), the verdict was we broke up for a reason.

Thats always a validating feeling.

In the words of my inner spirit animal, Taylor Swift, we are never, ever getting back together. Like, ever.

But hey, like I said, it cant hurt to double check.

2. The Non-Committal Charmer

Hell tell you youre exclusive, but he won’t ever make you his girlfriend.

He’ll monopolize your free time to ensure you dont spend time with anyone else, but he wont commit.

Youll never meet his friends or family, so dont even try.

He is in complete control of the relationship because you let him be.

His charm, wit and personality compel you to stay.

His goal is to perpetually keep your relationship in a hostage situation.

You want to see other people, but you dont want to put what you have at risk because its comfortable and fun.

Youre convinced that at some point, hell come to his senses.

He wont.

So, youre going to want to quit while you’re ahead. Dont waste any time.

3. The Egotistical PrickWho Plays On Your Heartstrings

Is it rough to call these people sociopaths?

Theyll do everything they can to make you like them in a short period of time.

Theyll cook you your favorite dinner, buy you nice wine and compliment you on the weird things you wish people would notice.

They make it so easy to let your guard down.

Then, one day, theyll just stop talking to you.

Theyll give you some bullsh*t excuse like theyre just “not ready for a relationship right now, or they really like you, and “it scares” them.

No, you just needed an ego trip. Or, you needed to get laid.

Or both.Whatever.

These types of guys are the reason all women are a little hesitant, confused, broken and yes crazy.

There are plenty of them out there.

4. The Former Frat Guy Who Just Cant Let Go Of College

In my opinion, these guys are the absolute worst.

This is mainly because they dont even realize theyre being the absolute worst. The naivety isnt at all charming.

He doesnt have to be a frat guy. Hes just the guy who loves college.

He cant grow up.

He loves his boys and beer pong more than he loves his job. He knows more about chugging beers than investing in a 401(k).

He has no idea how to start or maintain a conversation. His career path is questionable.

He most likely has the life goal of being a stay-at-home dad.

Thats what she said jokes are far too common, and he finds them far too funny.

While I personally havent gone on a single date with one of these guys, they exist in the masses.

So good luck, female young professionalsof America who thought men matured after college.

AsI say to my dad, “Im looking for the smartest idiot over 25.”

5. The One Youre Just Not That Into

These, for me, are the most common.

Then again, I think they’re common for everyone.

If we were into every person we met, there wouldnt be anyone special, right?

But sometimes, you really want to like someone.

He hasa great job. You love hisfriends and family. He’s funny.

You have everything in common. You can text all day and never run out of things to talk about.

Your Snapchat exchanges keep you laughing all day long.

He’s proud of you. He cares about you.

Youre even a perfect match (according to the stars).

But, you just arent into this person, no matter how hard you try to be.

While relationships take effort, you should never force yourself to fall for someone because you think you’d be great together.

It’s a recipe for disaster and heartbreak, and that’s one sad situationI won’t ever willingly walk into.

So when you find yourself in this kind of mess, you have to break the ice.

It’s unfair to string the other person along when he’s clearly feeling all the emotions you wish you could.

When you’re dating someone youre not into, but whom you love as a human being, breaking the ice is a double-edged sword.

You both end up hurt and bummed.

6.The One

Every person I talk to tells me the one will walk into my life when I least expect it.

It wont be because I spent my entire lunch break swiping left and right (mostly left).

It wont be because I asked my co-workers, friends, family and acquaintances if they know someone else whos completely exhausted by the routine dating scene.

It certainly wont be because I got drunk enough to get the nerve to walk up to a guy and strike up a random conversation.

No way, not me.

Im told Ill meet someone in a sweet form of serendipity.

Ill accidentally spill my coffee on him at Starbucks.

Well bond over the fresh produce at Trader Joes.

Well be at the same bar for happy hour.

Something will happen.

When that something does, in fact, happen, all those heartbreaks, mistakes, moments of weakness and feelings of guilt will wash away.

You won’t question whether your guard should be up or down. What or when to text won’t be a thought.

Everything will slip into place.

Because as everyone always says, “When you know, you know.”

So until then, my advice to every single woman out there is this: Be a lady.

Be fearless, but not careless.

Be willing to love and unafraid to get hurt.

Put yourself out there. Learn to love yourself.

Discover hobbies that fill your time.

But this is the most important piece of advice of all: Never ever settle for any of the five who come before “the one.”

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/2017/09/27/6-guys-youll-end-up-dating-when-youve-been-single-for-too-long/

[apsbicepstraining]

His final moment was for me, quarry is for him . HTAG 1 TTWatch Warners heartwarmingtribute to His Lord and Savior, and speak the full transcript of his powerful meaning below: HETAG 1 TT .embed-container berth: relative; padding-bottom: 56.25%; meridian: 0; overflow: obscured; max-width: 100%;. embed-container iframe,. embed-container object,. embed-container embed outlook: absolute; top: 0; left: 0; thicknes: 100%; stature: 100%; DTAG 8 TT DTAG 9 TTBut those people had it all wrong . DTAG 10 TT BTAG 2 TT DTAG 11 TTNow, adoration it or hate it, that opening scene captured the curiosity of the sports world, and the words grew the heart of my floor. The residual, as “theyre saying”, is biography. Wreaking us to this: the famous last words. And the only lieu this extraordinary journeying can intent. His final moment was for me, quarry is for him. Thank you Jesus . DTAG 14 TT Amsterdam’s solution to the obesity crisis: no fruit juice and enough sleep

The city is successfully campaigning fat in terms of promoting tap water in its institutions, together with healthy cooking grades and a ban on fast food sponsorship

The city of Amsterdam is leading the world in purposing the obesity epidemic, thanks to a revolutionary and wide-reaching curricula which is getting causes even among the poorest parishes that are hardest to reach.

Better knows we tulips and bicycles, Amsterdam has the highest rate of obesity in the Netherlands, with a fifth of its children overweight and at risk of future health problems.

The programme appears to be attain by making multiple targets at the same time from promoting tap water to after-school activities to the city repudiating sponsorship to happenings that take fund from Coca Cola or McDonalds.

It is led by a dynamic deputy mayor with the unanimous backing of the citys legislators. From 2012 to 2015, the number of overweight and obese babes has dropped by 12%. Even more impressive, Amsterdam did exactly what nobody else has managed, because the biggest sink has been amongst the lowest socio-economic groups.

It is in neighborhoods like the Bijlmer in the south-east that the programme of activities is changing lives. The Bijlmer is notorious, replies Wilbert Sawat, coordinator and PE teacher at De Achtsprong primary school, and thats why he wanted to work there. Other teaches do too, he announces. Here we are capable of make a difference.

The school is in the middle of a high-rise home estate that was experimental in the 1960 s, with heightened streets so parties would be free to path and round on the ground level. But the repetition commons are empty. In 1975, when the Dutch colony of Suriname in south America became independent, numerous migrated to Amsterdam and moved into the inexpensive flats. Cycling was not part of their culture.

Amsterdams agent mayor for healthcare, Eric van der Burg, who was brought up for eight years in the Bijlmer district. Picture: Graeme Robertson for the Guardian

The school, which in 2007 was in the top three in Amsterdam for overweight babes, is now one of 100 that are a key focus of the obesity program. Children are weighed and weighed every year. Some parents objected but now it is normal, reads Sawat. And so is tap water.

All brats have to bring liquid or milk to academy, he suggested. No juice. A fortune of mothers were really upset. We had really hard discussions with them. The mothers visualized juice or even squash was healthier, assuming they contained fruit. The schoolteachers told them about the carbohydrate. I told them we were doing them a promotion. They could have water at academy and then juice at home. Now its normal not a problem.

The ban on birthday feasts for the class too made ructions. It had become challenger. Soul drew cupcakes, so another bring cupcakes and juice and then cupcakes and juice and a toy. The institution made a folder of healthy considers, such as oranges or carrots embellished to look like faces.

A few years ago we had a son who stopped going to the bathroom. We find he had Mars and Snickers in his pockets. He was a really fat son and his mothers had put him on a diet but they didnt tell us, pronounced Sawat. Now the school is focused on health meat and even the nearby McDonalds has agreed that a child without a parent is simply buy an apple no fries. A European concede provisions one fruit or vegetable for all children for three days a week. The fridge is filled with carrots and radishes, which the children are told they must at least try.

Young infants are the focus of most obesity tries because it is easier to prevent them putting on load than try to sorting it out afterwards. But Dana Bijvoet, a nurse and family consultant working out of a secondary school in the field, picks up with the youngsters. There are about 2,000 morbidly obese children in Amsterdam who are the initial focus.

Children get their yearly fitness exams at the De Achtsprong school. Picture: Graeme Robertson for the Guardian

She tells urgently heartbreaking floors. Romana, 14, had liver failure because of her weight and was suffering from feeling and low-pitched self-esteem. Bijvoet are talking about dysfunctional class where parents envisage “their childrens” can manage without improve, where there is no coin and constant crisis. I want to know how they are in “peoples lives” their mental health and their self-esteem, she supposed. She needs to help with the other difficulties, to get a bit of infinite in their foremen be addressed with the obesity.

Romanas mothers, from Suriname, are divorced and her father, who has detention, said the mother was possessed he told Bijvoet of a lot of black magic and voodoo. He was a cab driver, rarely home but would not permit his daughter got to go alone. Expected what she craved most, Romana supposed, I want to fit into my jeans and feel right about myself, enunciated Bijvoet.

In the east part of the city, where car horns and music announce a Moroccan wedding in the street, a cooking class takes home for childhood and mothers in their home communities centre. Every week they come together to cook healthily to change the conventional recipes, tells Amira El Ashkar, a voluntary whose lineage was from Egypt. Eight girls and a boy, some of whom are very overweight, are stirring what they call muffins, which seem more like quiche but are earn with only egg and oatmeal to bind courgettes, peppers and other vegetables.

El Ashkar has also introduced health different versions of tagine and couscous bowls. Pedigrees want to eat healthy nutrient they just did not know how, she says.

Eric van der Burg, the agent mayor for healthcare and boast who propelled the programme of activities, was brought up for eight years in the Bijlmer and says he “d rather” live in those localities. I dont want to live in an area where everyone is prosperou and they all wear the same clothes and have the same hounds and hairdresser, he did.

Cooking class with parents and children at local schools in Amsterdam. Image: Graeme Robertson for the Guardian

Van der Burg, however, is the nearest Amsterdam has to a rightwinger, belonging to the conservative-liberal Peoples Party for Freedom and Democracy( VVD ). The residue of the citys legislators are to the left of him, so there are no the allegations of nanny-statism, although there are the programme is noticeably interventionist.

He has taken a tough line on advertising at sporting phenomena. The city is the primary patronize of a European basketball championship in July. We said to the organiser, you cant have Monster[ vigour boozing] or Burger King as co-sponsor, he read. The same no-compromise spate is being obligated with the European hockey and macrocosm ice-skating championships. They are talking to restaurants and boasts facilities about selling healthier meat and censoring cola adverts inside stadiums the city owns.

Another important part of the programme is sleep. It is very important to get enough sleep. Nobody knows that, articulates van der Burg.

Programme manager Karen den Hertog says that if you dont sleep, your hormones are messed up. You will be additional starving. It is your hormones talking to you, she suggested. They work to organise discussions with parents on childrens sleep blueprints through community leaders.

Children get their yearly fitness quiz at local schools in Amsterdam. Image: Graeme Robertson for the Guardian

Professor Corinna Hawkes, administrator of the center for meat plan at City University, who has reviewed and considered the Amsterdam model, is affected. They werent just saying gives have a soda excise they were thinking about how people connect with their milieu, she said.

They went to parents and understood their the behaviours and engaged in educational programmes to change them, Hawkes added. We have to understand why people are making their decisions and adapt accordingly, she said.

Some of the policies Amsterdam is using to crack obesity

A proscription on making juice to focus schools and investment in more water fountains around the city Cooking categorizes to learn healthy ranges of ethnic foods: pizzas with a broccoli basi, kebabs with lean chicken instead of pork, honey and years substituted for sugar City has refused to sponsor any event joint-funded by a fast food company Parents encouraged to set small children on motorcycles without pedals instead of pedaling them in buggies Focus on the first 1,000 days of a childs life, including lawyer for pregnant women and mothers Families encouraged to eat dinner together Sports core membership and activities subsidised for low-income houses

The post His final moment was for me, quarry is for him . HTAG 1 TTWatch Warners heartwarmingtribute to His Lord and Savior, and speak the full transcript of his powerful meaning below: HETAG 1 TT .embed-container berth: relative; padding-bottom: 56.25%; meridian: 0; overflow: obscured; max-width: 100%;. embed-container iframe,. embed-container object,. embed-container embed outlook: absolute; top: 0; left: 0; thicknes: 100%; stature: 100%; DTAG 8 TT DTAG 9 TTBut those people had it all wrong . DTAG 10 TT BTAG 2 TT DTAG 11 TTNow, adoration it or hate it, that opening scene captured the curiosity of the sports world, and the words grew the heart of my floor. The residual, as “theyre saying”, is biography. Wreaking us to this: the famous last words. And the only lieu this extraordinary journeying can intent. His final moment was for me, quarry is for him. Thank you Jesus . DTAG 14 TT Amsterdam’s solution to the obesity crisis: no fruit juice and enough sleep appeared first on apsbicepstraining.com.

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[mavwrekmarketing]

Image: ambar del moral/mashable

Katie Karpetz is a business witch.

No, really. Karpetz, a Canadian who identifies as a bog witch because of her unruly hair, is literally in the business of selling products marketed specifically for other witches.

SEE ALSO: Instagram shares magical ‘Harry Potter’ illustration to mark 20-year anniversary

She sells everything from vintage amethyst tower wands designed to soothe insomnia, to custom-made “witch bottles” whose recipes are top secret. For the uninitiated, a witch bottle acts as a “recharging” agent for different parts of the psyche.

Her preferred medium for displaying and advertising her inventory? Her Instagram account, @WitcheryWay.

A post shared by The Witch (@witcheryway) on Jul 5, 2017 at 7:21am PDT

Karpetz is not alone. A quick Instagram search for the hashtag #WitchesofInstagram will garner you over 700,000 results, and many of them are selling witchy wares.

There is no one particular path of witchcraft all of these business witches follow. Some identify as Wiccan, while others ascribe to Paganism, and others still prefer the term secular witchcraft. A lot of witches dont like to label their beliefs, and instead say what sort of traditions influence them the most, such as Germanic paganism, Hoodoo, root work (folk-based witchcraft), or Brujeria (Hispanic-based witchcraft).

The products the Instagram witches sell are as vast and diverse as their spiritual paths. There are magazines curated especially for witches, tarot cards with original illustrations, herbs and oils with various protection and healing properties, amulets and pendants, and, of course, an abundance of crystals.

Whats more, there exists a community among these Instagram business witches, in which the account owners often personally know and support each other with promotions, free of charge.

Everyones pretty supportive, radical feminists, building each other up, and giving shout outs to each other, said Christy Patton, founder of the New Orleans School for Esoteric Arts and operator of the witchy-lifestyle Instagram account, @NolaEsoteric.

We buy each others products, and we put them on our own Instagram stories.

A post shared by Nola Esoteric (@nolaesoteric) on Jun 28, 2017 at 12:51pm PDT

Christie Patton and Josie Campos of Nola Esoteric (left to right)

However, many of these self-made business witches did not start their Instagram accounts with the intention of building occult business empires. Karpetz began her account five years ago as a private space where she could post all the witchy stuff [she] was into, as well as items she was making for herself.

In the beginning it was just for me, Karpetz said of her Instagram account, which now has over 50,000 followers, in an email to Mashable. What started [the business] was a witch bottle I had created; after I posted it on Instagram people were asking where they could buy it.

A community of online activists

The Instagram witches are mostly self-taught through books, art, and the internet; Patton was actually inspired to start her school because of the lack of esoteric art teachers in New Orleans. However, most witches agree that witchcraft is, by nature and history, a solitary venture. That is why having the Instagram community is so unique.

We have become really close friends with some really amazing witches on Instagram, Patton said. We have friends all over the world.

Instagram is also used for promotions and feedback; most business witches actually sell their products on an accompanying website or Etsy store. Mashable reached out to Instagram for comment regarding its policy on promotion.

The promised benefits of the products range from personal improvement, such as making oneself more focused, to widespread good, like destroying fascism. Instagrams interface also allows customers to post a review as a comment right on the photo of whichever product is being advertised.

We all make very natural products for spiritual people because were ethically radical, said Josie Campos, Patton’s esoteric apprentice. We want change.

A post shared by Nola Esoteric (@nolaesoteric) on Jul 19, 2017 at 12:46pm PDT

Campos said she noticed this radical shift in the Instagram business witch community following the 2016 U.S. presidential election. The organization W.I.T.C.H. has seen a resurgence, a sizable number are signing up to hex the patriarchy, and, as an act of protest, Patton and Campos sold a special tea they created to honor the election results.

We collaborated with another Instagram witch, @cattailapothacary, and created this tea blend called This Tea Grabs Back, Patton said. It was made of cat herbs. (Don’t worry, the tea didn’t involve actual cats, just feline-named herbs and plants like pussy willow).

Its about how we as witches and as women could resist together, Campos added. And that even though we currently have to exist within a capitalist system, we can do it ethically.

Patton believes the political climate following the election has led to a surge in witchcrafts popularity as a whole, which she says she has seen, albeit anecdotally, reflected in her own business.

Witchcraft has been a big thing because of that feeling of hopelessness, Patton said. Especially right now, now that hopelessness is more accentuated. Most people are looking for answers and looking for change, and theyll keep practicing witchcraft if it helps them feel better.

Commercialization: for better or worse

Its hard to miss the recent commercialization and popularization of witchcraft in mainstream culture. Lana Del Rey has tweeted out the best dates for spell-casting and Urban Outfitters now sells crystals (and perfume with crystals in it), spell books, and tarot cards.

At the stroke of midnight Feb 24, March 26, April 24, May 23

Ingredients can b found online http://pic.twitter.com/PsjNpIODZE

Lana Del Rey (@LanaDelRey) February 24, 2017

Many of the Instagram witches dont take issue with magic becoming more mainstream. They do, however, have a problem with the methods mainstream retailers use. Campos and Patton wanted to stress that their products are created differently from those of a big-box chain.

All our herbs are organic and fair trade; we grow them ourselves,” Patton said.

A post shared by Urban Outfitters (@urbanoutfitters) on Nov 19, 2016 at 9:51am PST

Patton, Campos and the other business witches of Instagram are aware that many people who buy their products and witchy products from other stores are not interested in becoming practicing pagans. The idea of a witchy aesthetic has become something cultivated by many millennials, and they know it.

It doesnt bother us if theyre just interested in that. If youre interested in the aesthetic, I hope you stay for the products, Patton said.

Patton and Campos call these people dabblers, and warned that dabbling in witchcraft is not advisable.

When youre dabbling youre not taking yourself seriously, Campos said. Its dangerous and something people shouldnt try; its not just fun, muggles, Harry Potter its a spiritual belief.

Some members of the community disagree; they do not see a danger in people trying on witchcraft for size. Sarah Telaar (Gwen Hawk on social media) who is from Germany and runs the popular Instagram account @ancient_hearts, said one of her products in particular is aimed at newcomers.

I feel like a certain range of products, like my Herb Witch Boxes that are really popular, go out to people that are new to witchcraft or want to start learning more, Telaar said via email to Mashable. Which is absolutely perfect because these products are designed as starter kits for beginners.

A post shared by Ancient Hearts (@ancient_hearts) on Jun 15, 2017 at 9:43am PDT

Not all Instagram witches, however, are okay with the appropriation of the occult as an aesthetic. Olivia McMaster, a practicing Wiccan who is active in the Instagram witch community, said she finds the idea of a witchy aesthetic irksome.

I find it disrespectful to an extent, she said in an email to Mashable. While being interested in a faith or culture is great, using our symbols and traditions for your aesthetic isnt ok. Its a culture and a tradition and something that I and other witches take seriously, and commercializing our religion is hurtful.

McMaster did contend, however, that the commercialization did have some benefits. It gets the publics attention to the truth about witchcraft, she said. Its not like American Horror Story: Coven. Were real people with an amazing and unique and diverse religion, and I wish people saw the real us, not the make-believe, Hollywood depiction of witches.

Moving forward: the future of the business witch

The movement of magic into mainstream culture, Patton said, has allowed many older witches to come out of the broom closet, and be open and proud of their spirituality.

McMaster agreed that the publics fear of witches and witchcraft has begun to dim in recent years. We can be more vocal about our beliefs nowadays, and on social media, people are seemingly more accepting, she said.

As for the future, the witches believe that, despite the current state of affairs in the world, the future is bright. Patton and Campos are even planning to open a physical store to sell their products and, presumably, advertise their wares on Instagram. They view their enterprise as more than just a store they see it, and their social media presence, as a way to shape the future.

A post shared by Nola Esoteric (@nolaesoteric) on Nov 12, 2016 at 8:16pm PST

Its about re-educating the next generation, Patton said. All these old, white dudes will be dead in 15 to 20 years, and we have to be able to shape how the world will change. Instagram is just one tool to do that.

WATCH: ‘Forest Bathing’: How steeping yourself in nature could help with stress

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What You Should Drink This 4th Of July Weekend According To Your Horoscope

Happy fucking birthday, America. We’ll skip the lofty introductions and just get to the weekend horoscopes. Drinking is in store for all of us, so find out what you should drink and how muchnot by listening to your limits or caring for your liver, or anything, but by interpreting the movement of the stars. What could go wrong?

Aries

While Aries may typically be one of the drunkest of the zodiac, this patriotic weekend is a time for pacing yourself. No one likes the girl whos blacked out before the fireworks even start. The goal here is to still be the drunkest person at the barbecue, but to maintain that drunk for the entire day, which means youll be sticking to ciders. Unlike beer which is heavy and makes you bloat like no other, cider is light and refreshing. Bonus: an Aries alcohol tolerance means you can drink it all day without wreaking havoc. Branch out into a festive red berry flavor thatll look super patriotic in your 300 second Snapchat story.

Taurus

This weekend is looking like a marathon for you, Taurus. Endless parties, multiple family obligations, and the burning desire to be drunk at each and every one of them. Nothing says thanks for the invite, Im going to eat all your potato salad and then GTFO like the girl who arrives with a bottle of tequila. Start easy with some blended margaritas, and then slowly ease into debauchery that our forefathers would be proud of by peer pressuring everyone in attendance to take shots with you. Youll be the life (and eventually death) of the party.

Gemini

We all know you have one goal, and one goal only, this weekend, Gemini: the illusive perfect 4th of July Instagram. No easy feat, this photo must strike the perfect balance of contrived and natural, patriotic while still self-aware enough to realize America is burning, cute but not so glam that people can tell you spent three hours getting ready for a barbecue. You have a lot of work ahead of you, but we can by making at least one part simple. The perfect photo calls for the perfect summer cocktail: a fruity punch that photographs well and will have people leaving comments asking for the recipe. Something big batch is perfect for a weekend like this because it will trick people into thinking you showed up with an item to share. Pour it into a festive ice tea cooler, and your guest obligation is done without any actual cooking at all.

Cancer

With a full weekend of family time ahead of you, Cancer, you have the very specific task of being as drunk as possible without anyone noticing. Strategically this means drinking what everyone else is drinking and hoping no one notices that the alcohol is disappearing at an alarming rate. Your best bet this weekend is sticking to wine, preferably white and refreshing. Your mom will be psyched that you showed up to an event and actually brought something to share, and if you do it right she wont even notice that you took down of the bottle on your own.

Leo

You have one goal and one goal only this weekend, Leo: to not remember anything that happens after the fireworks start. We commend your dedication to blacking out no matter the occasion, and have some ideas of the best way you can do it. Vodka is the answer to all your problems, even the ones that arent really problems at all. Easily the most versatile alcohol, you can switch up your drinks throughout the day to avoid getting bored and slowing down; the only constant is that half the cup is the vodka of your choosing. Avoid shots at all cost, less because of taste and more because no one like the girl who shows up and starts throwing back Absolut as if she actually enjoys it.

Virgo

This weekend is looking scenic for you, Virgo. Odds are youll be spending a lot of time in nature, away from the bustle and chaos of a typical 4th of July. This, by no means, allows you to forgo drinking, but more so means that you can relax and drink something luxurious. Before you head off on your weekend adventure, spend some time putting together a really top-notch jug (or three) of sangria. If youre feeling really wild, make a red and a white: one for day time adventures and the other for relaxing at night under the stars. Youre about to have the most relaxing 4th weekend of all time, so just sit back and sip the night away.

Libra

On a hectic weekend like this, Libras need a chill af drink to match their chill af demeanor. As much as I hate to say it, youre looking at a weekend full of beer. Hopefully thats your thing. But also, why is that your thing. Its summertime so why not dive into Corona and lime and worry about things like calories and bloating later? The holidays are meant for over-indulging anyways. Plus, this is a super easy drink to offer to people without seeming weird, meaning you can cozy up to literally anyone at your party. Can you imagine telling your grandkids that you and your husband met over a shared Corona? Its precious, in a painfully California way.

Scorpio

Scorpios are here this holiday weekend to fuck up your party and drink all your alcohol. Thats it. So instead of worrying about what youre going to drink, just show up and drink whatever the guest offers. If they dont offer anything, drink it anyway. Pros of this approach: a cheaper alternative to buying alcohol. Cons: Youre going to be doing a lot of mixing, which wont bode well for your hangover. But thats a problem for later you, and present yous only concern is that your cup is never empty. Go forth and wild out, Scorpio. No one does it better than you.

Sagittarius

While Sagittarians can frequently be the life of the party, theyre always riding the fine line of being one drink away from sobbing in the bathroom because they looked up the tree hashtag on Instagram, and like, nature is just so beautiful (a true story). To combat this, your only rule for this weekend is to stay as far away from wine as possible. While an excess of any alcohol can set you off, wine is a fast track to tears. Venture off into the land of hard alcohol and party the weekend away without worrying about being that girl.

Capricorn

Capricorns love all types of alcohol, as long as its on the rocks. While I may never understand this preference, I respect it. This weekend, dont stray from what you know. In fact, make it as obvious as possible. Nothing garners respect amongst strangers like the girl casually sipping tequila on the rocks in the corner of the room. Youll make friends in no time.

Aquarius

Its really all or nothing with Aquarians when it comes to alcohol. Youre either at a reasonably responsibly (aka boring) two drinks, or youre a fifth deep and trying to convince everyone that now is a really good time to go skinny dipping. This weekend, lean toward the latter. Its a holiday! Let that freak flag fly! And do it while drinking questionable amounts of champagne. Start off tame with mimosas and then abandon the notion of juice about halfway through the day. Theres nothing quite like the sophistication and impending migraine of a champagne drunk, which is exactly what America deserves this weekend.

Pisces

You might have had a more low-key weekend in mind, Pisces, but were here to tell you thats a terrible fucking idea. In this climate, there is only one weekend a year that you get to be unabashedly proud of being an American, and you will not be wasting it on a three day long Netflix binge. Nothing tempts you to dip your toes into the pools of alcoholism like tropical rum based drinks. Drinking rum is like going to a party you didnt plan on attending, but after a few Mai Tais youre not only hosting the party, but likely getting kicked out of it at some point. Save the lounging for your inevitable hangover and spend that time cursing America and everything it stands for. So, kind of the way you spend the rest of the year. 

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10 Great Ways to Drive Traffic to Your Website

Research shows that when business owners are asked what they’d like most, they respond first: More customers. Following in close second: Drive more traffic to my website.

Well, I’d like to summarize here what I’ve learned about #2: Driving traffic to your site, because, to me, it’s the #1 way to gain more customers—the #1 “want most.”

Who is your audience?

The first step in marketing in any medium—including online and digital—is KNOW YOUR TARGET AUDIENCE. Who are you talking to and trying to appeal to? What makes them tick? What do they care about? And who are their friends and business associates?

Give your audience “good stuff.”

Did you know that today there are 164 million blogs online? BUT 71% of these get fewer than 5,000 visitors per month. What’s the problem? CONTENT. If you’re not putting good information out there that your audience cares about and wants to read, they’ll just click on by.

So, what is good content? It’s news, data, statistics and facts that position you as an expert in your field—someone people want to buy from. It’s reliable information that generates online traffic, leads and sales. It’s not just great content, but the right content that readers want to share with their business associates. And can you guess what happens next? YOUR website traffic grows because of all these new visitors. WIN! WIN!

Once you know your audience and the information they’re looking for, it’s time to dive in and start creating the great content that positions you as the expert.

Now, here are my favorite 10 ways to drive traffic to your website using that great content you created.

1. Start blogging and never stop!

I just want to emphasize this one more time. Blogging works. It does drive traffic to your website. Wordstream.com recently ran an experiment and increased their blogging from twice per week to over 10 posts per week. The result was a 300 percent growth in traffic in just two months. Get EVERYONE in your organization writing blogs and supplying ideas for content.

2. Vary the length and format of your content.

Despite what some would have you believe, there’s no secret recipe for online content. That’s why it’s important to mix it up, trying different lengths and formats to appeal to different kinds of readers. Use video, infographics, news posts, graphs and data, shorter and longer pieces to keep your readers attentive and coming back.

3. Grab ‘em with your headlines.

Without a great headline, even the best blog post will go unread. Master the art of headline writing. The best writers often write more than 20 different headlines before finally settling on the one that will drive the most traffic, so think carefully about your headline before you post.

4. Optimize, optimize!

SEO is not dead. Optimizing your content for search engines is still valuable. Are you creating internal links to new content? Optimizing for on-page SEO doesn’t have to take a lot of time, and it could help boost traffic to your site. 

5. Attract visitors through advertising.

Paid search, social media advertising and display advertising are all excellent ways of building your brand and getting your site in front of people. Consider your advertising objectives. Do you just want more traffic, or are you looking to increase conversions, too? Each paid channel has its pros and cons. If you’re hoping for more sales as traffic to your site increases, you’ll need to focus on particular keywords in your search strategies.

6. Don’t forget email.

Good ole email. Traditional, yes, but still a powerful marketing tool. You’d be surprised that even a simple email blast can cause an uptick in your online traffic. Word of caution: Avoid relentless emails about every single thing that’s new at your business. Email today must be targeted and relevant. Send a friendly, appropriate email reminder to those already enjoying or familiar with your products and services—chances are much greater for them to engage instead of filtering you to spam or opting out.

7. Make sure your site is responsive.

Today, mobile-friendly sites are a necessity! Don’t lose sight of this. Make sure your visitors can access your site from whatever device they’re holding in their hands. And, if you force upon them an uncomfortable experience—pinching and scrolling around your site—they’ll go elsewhere. Make your website accessible and easily viewable across a range of devices, including smaller smartphones.

8. Research your competition.

Find out what people are reading (and talking about), and emulate that type of content to bring traffic to your website. There is special software that gives you an at-a-glance view of what content is popular with readers. Find out what your competition is putting out there.

9. Make sure your site is fast.

When was the last time you waited 10 or 15 seconds for a webpage to load? Not worth it, is it? If your site takes forever to load, your reader will move on. Kissmetrics has an excellent article showing how load time affects your bottom line. Your website pages need to be technically optimized. This means you need to check your image file sizes, the structure of your pages, and more. The faster your site loads, the better.

10. Examine your analytics data.

Google Analytics is an invaluable source of data for any company with a website. And you really DO need it! The information it gathers—from your most popular pages and visitor demographics to when and where your site traffic is coming from—is invaluable to your efforts to stay up-to-date with your promotional and content strategies. Pay attention to what its telling you and make adjustments.

Want to read more about this topic and others related to growing your business online? Download our free e-book about growing your agribusiness with a hard-working website. Give VistaComm a call to discuss elevating your presence online today.

Original Post Here: 10 Great Ways to Drive Traffic to Your Website

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Right-to-Repair is ridiculous

Congrats, you got it apart. Now what?

Image: Shutterstock / PATHOMRAT PRAERIN

My co-worker, Tracey, held her iPhone like a baby bird with a bent wing.

I stared at the dark screen. The device was still on, but stuck somewhere between living technology and a dead iPhone. Tracey said that the device made a popping sound and got really hot in one corner while she was making a phone call. Then, her screen cracked, and burnt her ear. She wanted to know what to do. She explained the incident happened shortly after having third-party iPhone screen repair company iCracked replace her shattered iPhone 6 screen. iCracked was ready to let the original technician repair her phone again. I warned her against it. The phone was obviously dangerousand letting them touch it again probably wouldnt help. In fact, I thought it might hurt.

Right-to-Repair? What a ridiculous phrase. No one has the right to repair anything.

I was reminded of this episode as I read about Nebraska, the latest state to consider new Right-to-Repair legislation. If the legislation passes, it’d require Apple, Samsung, and other electronics manufacturers to supply parts and detailed repair manuals to everyone, including repair shops, and average consumers. And there are several legislative efforts like it underway around the country.

Right-to-Repair? What a ridiculous thing to say. No one has the right to repair anything. You might have the skill to repair something (something that iCracked tech might’ve lacked). And you can hand people all the schematics, instructions, and parts you want and they still wont be able to replace an iPhone battery or screen.

Another way to say it

We dont lead with that language, said The Repair Associations Executive Director Gay Gordon-Byrne.

Her organization supports Right-to-Repair legislation around the country. Gordon-Byrne, who has a bit of a DIY streak in her, agreed that repairing something isn’t a right like free speech. In fact, some of the legislation her organization sponsors is called Fair Repair. The Right-to-Repair language actually started in the auto industry. Obviously, it would be silly for us not to take advantage [of it.], she told me.

Even though the language of the legislation being pushed in Nebraska includes the word consumers and reads broadly, Gordon-Byrne insists the goal of the legislation isn’t you should repair your own stuff.

That may be so, but I worry the DIY community, the Maker community, and especially Apple-repair shop iFixitwhich stands firmly behind Right-to-Repair, and urges their site’s visitors to support itfeel otherwise.

The company, which sells an excellent line of repair tools and kits, does daily teardowns of popular consumer electronics products, and rates them on repairability. It gave the iPhone 6 a 7 out of 10 score, which makes it sound quite repairable. Of course, the teardown features 22 steps using four specialized tools you can buy, naturally, from iFixit. Its screen replacement guide for the phone features 26 steps, an $80 part, and seven tools.

Gordon-Byrne says companies like iFixit should be credited with small third-party iPhone repair services that do exist. Without the intel they provide on how these products are made and the components within them, as well as the tools and, sometimes, replacement parts they offer? There probably wouldnt even be an iCracked.

The End of Repair

When they work, sites and services like iFixit and iCracked fill in a crucial gap between the end of your iPhone warranty and buying a new iPhone. But Traceys experience makes me wonder if the entire consumer electronics repair industry is a farce. Apple and Samsung aren’t building these products to be repaired. They started with batteries that cant be removed, and continued with hidden screws. Even water-resistance flies in the face of a repair job. ‘Soon as you open that phone, you can probably kiss any real waterproofing you might’ve had goodbye.

This, for Gordon-Byrne, is a positive. Most repair is actually simpler than people expect, she told me, adding that many repairs aren’t “repairs” at alltheyre just parts replacement. If a board goes dead, the repair shop slips it out, and slides a new board in.

Shes right, but the typical consumer gamely trying to repair their iPhone wouldnt get that far in. Theyd struggle to open the device, and probably wouldnt know how to unplug the front panel that includes both the LCD and glass screen cover.

I agree, theres a shift in manufacturing that has tended to using more adhesives and more integrated parts, said Gordon-Byrne.

Its not that I dont believe in better-built products and repairability. We need tightening against planned obsolescence cyclesTV sets that once lasted 25 years now fail after five. Im also a tinkerer. Ive taken apart everything from VCRs to BlackBerry Curve phones and their classic scroll buttons. When I see moving parts, I think: repairability. Todays phones have almost no moving parts. At least the iPhone 6 had a moveable home button. The iPhone 7 and 7 Plus dont even have that.

Apple would rather just not.

Apple, which wouldn’t comment for this story, has made no secret of its distaste for the Right-to-Repair movement, lobbying against it in multiple states. Its also sought to steer people away from third-party and potentially unlicensed repair companies by lowering the cost, in the U.S., at least, of some of its own repair services (Apple doesn’t cover most cracked screens unless the crack was caused by a manufacturing defect). The company also understands just how hard it is to repair and dismantle its own products. In 2015, Apple introduced LIAM, a custom-design, iPhone-dismantling robot. Its still a prototype, and only safely dismantles an iPhone 5, but it also separates and sorts recyclable and hazardous materials. My guess is that, at some point in the not-too-distant future, iPhones will be so thin, powerful, and complex than only a robot will be able to repair them.

Opponents contend that Apple’s fighting Right-to-Repair legislation because it wants to protect trade secrets. But which ones, exactly? iFixit teardowns reveal virtually every component inside these devices. There’s clearly some stuff iFixit cannot figure out via observation. Im fine with that. Apple wanting to protect some details of its iPhone technology is no different than Kentucky Fried Chicken trying to protect its secret recipe.

DIY disasters

I think its a fair concern that Right-to-Repair laws could lead to an explosion of Radio Shack-like iPhone and Samsung electronics parts shops. Consumers will wander in with broken iPhone and Samsung Galaxy screens, and walk out with all the parts and tools they need to repair them. And they will fail, miserably.

Plus, what if a consumer’s injured during a failed repair attempt? They slice open a finger on the cracked glass, or put it back together incorrectly, so the battery fails (and maybe even explodes). Its the consumers fault, obviously, but they could also try to sue Apple or Samsung.

Gordon-Byrne laughed off my concern. I cant imagine someone going in to try and sue Apple for a finger cut, when its already clear that the phone has glass and that glass is fragile.

The Right-to-Repair movement would make a lot more sense to me if it focused solely on industrial technology. Farming and manufacturing equipment are, increasingly, filled with hard-to-repair solid-state components. When theres millions of dollars (and potentially: infrastructure) on the line, it makes sense to ensure that businesses, farms, even governments can repair this equipment, as opposed to simply having to replace it.

The Repair Association has, in fact, considered pursuing something less inclusive. Gordon-Byrne pointed me to Wyoming and Kansas, two states considering legislation tailored to farm and ranching equipment. On its Wyoming Bill page, though, The Repair Association says it would like to see the bill be adjusted to include all digital equipment.

Too new to fail

If Right-to-Repair succeeds, Gordon-Byrne sees a lot more people getting trained and going into business for themselves as technicians. It could be a booming business. It could also face one very big challenge: modern product-upgrade cycles. New smartphone manufacturer and carrier plans are encouraging consumers to upgrade their phones every year (and pay a monthly fee, so they dont notice the $700 theyre plunking down for that new iPhone). Leaving aside clear profit motives, it introduces a new possibility to our smart-phone-owning existence: More and more people will be carrying like-new phones, and repair opportunities may dwindle.

That reality’s probably years away, though, and Right-to-Repair is struggling to make its way through a handful of state legislatures, which leaves us with the somewhat dicey status quo and companies like iCracked that are, even by their own admission, feeling their way through the repair process.

The repair industry was the wild west and to some extent, it still is. Said iCracked CEO and Founder AJ Forsythe.

He was understandably alarmed about Traceys experience, noting that its not the norm. iCracked does seem obsessed with repair quality. It even captures video of its parts on the assembly line and uses barcodes to attach that footage to the final product its iTechs use in repairs.

However, iCracked, like most third-party repair companies, is still flying partially blind-folded. Since Apple doesnt provide repair manuals and certified parts to companies like his, Forsythe has made over two dozen visits to China to find the companies supplying iPhone parts. Are they the exact same parts Apple uses? A lot of the time, they are the same, said Forsythe. But Apple is well known for forcing supply partners to, sometime subtly, alter components just for them. Could Forsythe be certain his LCD panels match Apples?

As far as we know from the supply chain team over there, they are wildly similar, or the same, he told me.

Forsythe, naturally, supports Right-to-Repair. I asked him if hes comfortable with even more consumers trying to repair their own phones. He acknowledged that not everyone’s as handy and tech savvy as he is. Would I feel comfortable having my father or mother repair a phone?”

“I guess [the answer] would be how well they could follow instructions.

AND NOW, A DIFFERENT OPINION: Apple doesn’t want you to repair your iPhone because they’re money-hungry and evil.

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