#it's so bad but finding pictures took me 5ever

[elsiebarnes]

ELSIE BARNES — NEW YEARS EVE 2024

[mintmatcha]

This took me 5ever because my brain still hurts! sorry it sucks!!!

"Can you not smoke right now?"

Zeke pulls an even longer drag, pulling away to let the smoke seep from between his bared teeth. The sidewalk outside his apartment is empty besides you two and a collection of trashcans waiting for the morning. Even without summer heat, the stench is almost papable, hanging in the back of your throat.

"When did you become my fucking mother?" He flicks the butt to the ground and crushes it between his dark heel and the pitted concrete. He jams his hands into his pockets, shoulders hunched like the hackles on a dog, ready to bite.

Time may have sharpened his teeth, but it's done the same to yours.

"If I was your mother-" You pause, picking words you know you'll regret. This was supposed to be peaceful, and yet you're willingly starting a war- "I would have abandoned you years ago."

Zeke scoffs. Not a strong enough reaction to satisfy the worst part of you.

"Oh. sorry-- if I was your mom I would have sent you to military school and then abandoned you, right?"

Zeke looks up at you from over his glasses, eyes narrowed into slits. His jaw flexes, muscles working as he grits and simmers.

"God, you're such a cunt." His voice is tempered- a sign you hit the exposed nerve he never let heal. After a couple of breaths, something that always fuels the fire instead of calming him, the man straightens. "You'd be a shittiest mom."

Zeke grinds his heel into the ashes again. "And I know shitty moms, don't I?"

Usually, you could shrug his insults off, but this one sticks. He doesn't know yet, how all those tests came back positive, how the doctor gave you tiny pictures of the blob that's growing inside you.

You knew sleeping with your ex was a bad idea, you just didn't think the regret would be so physical.

"No, I wouldn't." The crack shocks him more than you.

"Are you fucking crying?" Zeke softens just a bit, more confused than anything else. You're horrified to realize he's right- tears have begun to bubble down your cheeks. You try to hide behind your hands, but the damage is done; he finds your arm, holding you by the crook of your bow as he dips to your height. "Hey, stop. Stop that. What are you doing?"

He takes your hands into his, manhandling your face free so he can see you properly. You forget that he's pretty under that personality, with deep set blue eyes and tussled blonde hair. His beard is no longer pure brown, but dusted with flecks of grey towards his temples. When he looks at you, it still feels like you're 16, talking to a boy that might love you.

"You've gone soft on me, girl," he clicks his teeth, affect still flat.

But you're not 16. You're fifteen years older than that, talking to a man who broken your heart too many times. The thought of him loving you no longer fills you with butterflies, but something heavier, the sinking feeling of lead in your gut.

"Zeke..."

He's hurt you and you've returned the favor, over and over again. Sometimes by accident, most of the time on purpose.

"What's wrong with you? You never cry over this shit." He throws in a shrug, "Why do you care about being a mom all or a sudden?"

Hands still held away from you, its all you can do to sniffle. As he waits, Zeke's face slowly drops as he thinks, paging through micro-expressions.

His eyes widen. He knows.

"Why do you care about being a mom all of a sudden?" he repeats, much more serious than before.

He knows and yet he waits for you to tell him otherwise.

"I'm pregnant."

The news hits him physically. Zeke recoils, dropping your arms to clutch at his hair, palms digging into his temples.

"Shit. Shit, that's-- it's--" He clears his throat. "It's mine?"

He knows you haven't been dating anyone else; the second anyone gets close, Zeke's there, dragging you back into his mess and back into his bed. That's what happened last month. That's how this happened.

"Yeah, it's yours. Unfortunately."

"Don't. Don't play like that right now." Zeke's head snaps to face you, lips curled in disgust. "I'm trying not to lose my fucking mind and I can't have you fucking insulting me-"

A sob you weren't expecting escapes you. The cocktail of hormones and stress has left you brittle, leaving you crumbling in its wake.

"I'm s-s-sorry," you hiccup, clutching at your face again, "I know you hate me-"

"Stop crying," he says, coming back to you. "I didn't say that, stop crying."

"Jesus Christ, it's fine." With a barely there tremble, Zeke wraps his arms around you and sighs. The wool lapel of his coat digs into your nose harder as he pulls you tighter, a semblance of real affect there. "I'm here, it's fine, it's fine. Just calm down."

"I don't know what I'm going to do," you whimper through hiccups and sniffles, wiping your face on his coat.

"Breathe or else you're gonna pass out." Zeke pats your back, stroking up and down in the way he knows you like. "You're being crazy. Is this really the end of the world?"

You scowl into him. "Fu-fuck you, you're such an asshole."

"There's my girl, there's my spitfire." Zeke presses his lips into the crown of your head, surprisingly chaste and sweet. He does it again, then again, arm locked around your shoulders and chin pressed into your forehead. After a long moment of being locked to him, he begins to sway, pressing one leg against yours to force you backwards. The give and take guides you, pushing you towards his place.

The shuffle is awkward and slow, but the man never lets you part from him, even as he struggles with the lock. You try not to let it comfort you, you try not to fall for him again, but his breath against the crown of your head sends chills down your spine.

Maybe he loves you, deep down somewhere.

The apartment is dark, illuminated by flashes and thrums of light. Eren is sprawled on the couch, headset half off of his head. He barely looks up from his game, throwing a nod your way. You nod back and hope the dim hides your tears.

"Oh, hey." The young adult pushes his mic out of this face, "Z, are we still going to order pizza, or-?"

Zeke shoots him a look.

"Alright, I'll fucking order it, damn."

You're quickly ushered back to Zeke'a room. It looks how it always does- clean, if not barren. You're finally let go, Zeke's arm falling away as you shuffle towards the bed. The man is already rummaging through his closet, pulling out the two extra pillows he keeps there for you.

"Lay down." He joins you there, puffing up the down and piling them the way you like. When you don't immediately obey, he gestures towards it, almost urgent, "Come on."

The conversation you need to have dies on your lips. Both of you stand there, the sound of Eren's game permeating through the thin walls. Tears still stain your cheeks, but the hysteria seems to have stopped for now.

"You want to have it, don't you?" Zeke says.

You nod.

"I figured. You always wanted a kid." The blonde flops down on to the mattress and you follow, spread out of what used to be your side. maybe it still is. "Just didn't think it'd be my kid."

"You don't have to be involved, Zeke."

His boots are muddied at the heels, staining the practically pristine comforter with red clay. Your own shoes aren't much better; the laces are undone and soggy, trailing halfway to the floor.

"I'm not a dead beat." His hand finds yours and squeezes. "I'm a shitbag, but I'm not a dead beat. I'll be here."

That doesn't mean anything. There's no plan, no certainty, no promises- but it makes you feel better regardless. Zeke has never been a good man, but he's always been good to you when it mattered the most.

"Do you think it's a boy or a girl?" he says.

"I think it's a genderless blob of cells right now." you reply, "So it probably looks just like you."

He shoots you a look, not unlike the one he gave Eren.

"You can laugh now, but you're going to be irate when our child looks more like me than you."

Zeke'a hand squeezes tighter and you squeeze back.

[nathaniacolver]

okay i'm back for what i'm calling the "pirate" shrine

did the shrine, now fight the pirates

well that was quite uneventful. got a blue hinox hammer though

bro i think I'm literally just gonna walk this korok to his friend

what if the lightning strikes the korok while I'm hoisting him in midair fkhhdkdkdjdsksjd

okay now the shrine

bro i love that the bigger enemies can just throw or carry smaller bokoblins like that's so funny lol

bro "turbine power" was the quickest shrine i've done in a MINUTE

okay lady let me go report that i killed the pirates

BRO only for 2 pony points??? Chile......

NO WAIT AN ENDURA CARROT TOO LET'S FREAKING GOOOOOOOOOO MALANYA I'M COMING FOR YOU

wait feed the doge first

55 DEFENSE ROYAL SHIELD??????? OH LET'S GO

wait i have one (1) bomb flower i can go explore the well

the fact that the camera makes a box around the object you're photographing is actually pro skills development like

now why did i think the game would encourage me to take a picture of the statue of the goddess 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ RESPECT CULTURE NIA

taking Sol (zelda's horse) to malanya we'll see what happens

golden apple for a golden horsey!

wait i LOVE malanya's color palate!!

"the god of horses cannot revive on an empty stomach" skkskajsms okay

Sol baby daddy is taking notes okay daddy's gonna go cook meals and give them to horse god so we can max you out okay

used my sleepover card bc i think i wanna go fight the lynel

ope it's raining. not yet I guess. let's go see the spring of power instead

yo what happened to the mother goddess statue of power????¿?

hylia don't worry baby i got you!!!

okay the lynel made me eat like 30 hearts worth of food bruh. why did it not get stunned? Why could i not mount it?

a like like????? just in the open????

NOT GLOOM HANDS OKAY I WILL STAY AWAY FRKM SKILL LAKE FREAKING

bro i killed an aerocuda but then a BOAR SQUEALED right next to me and it FREAKED ME OUT

oh i like this pendulum shrine!

i practiced on the chest one then i oneshotted the regular one

i will indeed go into this cave in the other eye of skull lake but first off let's wait for the dragon to go into the depths so i can get his scale. lemme just sit here and drink my boba while I wait for him to fly down

ok he very much did not go down into the chasm.....i shoulda known. The dragon music wasn't playing

okay tulin you gotta go your gusr just made me die

bro if this goes to the depths i'm reloading. that obsidian frog scared me SO BAD last time

bro why are there skeleton bokoblins????........

IF THERE ARE GLOOM HANDS DOWN HERE IT'S A NO

oh just a skeletal hinox that's fine

now about these blue rocks...............idk man

bruh the reason I didn't know where toto lake was was bc i was looking for BLUE water 😭😭 poor zora pollution :(

bro i was about to launch a full-scale search and rescue for the stone slab, like the whole mountain, and then i look to the left and it's just There

bro okay lemme explore real quick

all that exploring did was get me a blue boss bokoblin horn but that's okay ALSO i learned that you can just shoot the baskets of those bokoblin basket bearers and the fire chuchus will all explode!

okay sneak up on the kids as they gossip ........literally it's always the kids

bro why is it SO HARD to swim through this waterfall. realistics be darned

aw dorephan looks so beat up .......

bro i can't believe muzu STILL does not trust me like

BRO I TOLD YOU SOEMONE IS IMPERSONATING ZELDA. BEN (my brother) WAS LIKE "NAJ" BUT BRO I TOLD YOU!!!! IT'S GANON ALL OVER AHAIN DKSJDNSJDDN

bro i was scared ab finding the droplet rock bc my brother took 5ever to find it but lo and behold you just climb to the top and Look

i love briefly subverting the blood moon by teleporting

YO AM I AB TO SEE A COUPLE FIGHT BETWEEN SIDON AND YONA YOOOOOO

oh the sludge like like had to intervene

"I can see right through you" oh she gagged him a bit

SHE GAGGED HIM GOODDDDDD

i already saw the hurricane cutscene when my brother played so eh

i totally mis-dove but whatever

bruh......no bomb arrows........okay time to go back to the depths. and maybe hestu. and maybe misko's treasure

bro i just barely got the "combat training: throwing" shrine 😭😭 i guess i'll take the free regen and crappy weapons

spent like 20 min in the depths, faced a lynel, got 2 more lightroots, still don't have 150 poes, and only have 3 bomb flowers. wow.

something something sleep to regen health something

need to live tweet my playing of totk but don't wanna be annoying on my irl so i'll just do it here. this is the first bit:

BEWARE: TOTK SPOILERS BELOW

"i know i'll be ok with you link" okay they are IN LOVE

WHERE IS LINK IN THE CUTSCENE. THEY HAVE TO SHOW HIM IN THE NEXT 10 SECONDS OR I WILL FRET

ZONAI????!!?!!?!??!?!?! (Listen i forgot the gameplay trailer)

me walking at a respectable pace as to not leave zelda's side

BABE THERE'S TOO MUCH MALICE HERE WHY ARE WE STILL GOING

just talked to zelda and she was like "i'm so excited!!!!" GIRL DO YOU NOT HAVE AN OUNCE OF SELF-PRESERVATION

swinging the sword swinging the sword

WAIT WHY DO I HAVE 30 HEARTS WHYYYYYYY DO I HAVE 30 HEARTS

THEY JUST ADDED AN INSTRUMENT OR TWO OH FRICK AND IT'S GETTING LOUDER oh i already love the sound engineering

GLOWY SPIRAL????

DON'T PICK UP THE TEAR BABY oh frick oh frick

OH THAT'S WHY I HAD 30. FOR THE DRAMA

CAN'T LOOK AT MY TYPING I'M WATCHING THE CHTSCENE

OH FRICK IT JUST SHATTERED OH FRICK

gamer lean on x games mode rn

mans said screw it i'm out. fly you fools

BRO I WAS TYPING THE ABOVE WHEN HE LUNGED AND I GOT SO NERVOUS THAT I'D HAVE TO FIGHT FJSKDKJSJDAHHDLADG THE JOYCONS ARE FLOPPING AROUNS ON MY ARMS

THAT TEAR BETTER PROTECT HER I HOPE THAT'S WHAT THAT GLOWY YELLOW WAS

BRO WHAT. THE BLUE GLOWING IS GOOD. this is so anakin skywalker of him btw

baby don't you worry i'm gonna make link level up so fast so he can come and get you

oop naked link again AND HIS SHORTS ARE SHORTER????

nice mani link

A MAN'S VOICE???????? WHO IS IT WHY DOES EVERYONE KNOW THEIR NAMES

okay so The Voice just gives him an arm. okay

the malice or whatever stopping just at the triforce is Symbolic, i think

is it really a master sword or is it a master Dagger

i rly be taking screenshots of everything like i'm a tourist

okay green hand thing go off!!! oop give it a high five and it turns blue and goes behind you as a save point

*taking notes* okay cogs are cogging.......gears are gearing..........

now why the frick did it have me dive like that. what was The Reason

i Forgor that link can tread water indefinitely. swimming king

not me searching every nook and cranny like there's gonna be secrets in this Cave

PANTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ARCHAIC PANTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

wait i put them on and now he looks like a gladiator.......cardboard skirt & Jesus sandals........ok shirtless king

oop just noticed his hair animations & the layers are CRAZY but it lookin good

wait so they was underground......and now in the sky...................i have Theories

they said aerial view shot once again but i mean AERIAL

ope no climbing, you're already too high in the sky

the lighting looks SO GOOD!

it's so silent up here i love it.

the MUSIC AHHHH

WAIT EVERYTHING'S AN ISLAND???? OH WE WAY THE FRICK UP IN THE SKY LINK. HOW CAN YOU BREATHE THAT THIN AIR

this game is making me fall In Love. with Silence

TREE BRANCH YES THE WORLD IS HEALING

apples. i could Cry

is that a broom?????

wait so the soldiers are bad and the stewards are good. it's just like real life!

why do i have the feeling that this is a /different/ princess zelda that left this to him.......oh nvm it's just the purah pad. what happened to the sheikah slate???

is link gonna look at pics on it and get emo

wait so. garden of time (ok Christianity reference). so zelda has lived through some trash already and is like poor link in the past. let's give him this

aw it's lonely :(

YES WE'RE GETTING ZELDA RIGHT AWAY I COULD CRY

ooh the purah pad looks slick (i'm so sorry but why does that sound like a tampon brand LIKEEEEE)

high five!!! oh wait high fives have OTHER FUNCTIONS???!?!

now why did the bridge have to do all that fancy stuff. (ik it's for stability or whatever don't @ me engineers)l

just smashed some pots. link's Primeval Urge

ok so linear path for Diving. got it.

that's a hot-footed frog.......................i could cry. i AM crying

picked up a rock. now i just have to see some Chickens

there are Grates in the ground and you can peek below. idk why i like that so much.

i am hunting these ostriches like i might die

THAT GUY SNUCK UP ON ME SO SILENTLY. I DECIDED I HATE FLOATING MACHINE ENEMIES (don't worry i was fine)

why did i try to light a frog on fire

[kate-komics]

Hey Kate! I was wondering if you could share your process in how you go about drawing backgrounds in your comics? Yours always look on point, Especially when it comes to the interiors of space ships which I find impossible haha. Any tips would be greatly appreciated!

Okay, first off... sorry this took 5ever for me to answer 😅

So, I suppose the short answer would be a basic understanding of perspective and A LOT of references. I seriously have folders upon folders full of collected photo references and a billion 3D model references from sketchfab and various other parts of the internet. They save my ass whenever I'm having a tough time figuring out a shot.

For understanding drawing perspective as a whole (and so you don't feel lost with all these references and models) I highly recommend the book 'Framed Perspective' by Marcos Mateu- Mestre. I have a copy that sits next to my desk at all times 😊 absolutely amazing. Makes it all seem so easy.

As for my process it's actually very similar to this post I saw not too long ago! Check it out down here ⬇️

https://art-tnt.tumblr.com/post/612413698481537024/indoril-niehaus-bludragongal-askoursquad

But yeah, my process for backgrounds is often pretty similar to what’s above. Find a reference, lay down a guide and then add or take away for whatever you need to. Like this panel and this reference model. I checked some angles I liked to help me figure out my grid then I changed a few things in the room, laid down my lines and added some ships and people. Very common for a lot of artists apparently.

Though I don’t always use model help. If it’s a background I’m familiar with/ have already drawn a million times I can usually do an easy perspective grid myself. Like these ⬇️

I also eyeball quiet a lot of things because I’m lazy😅 as you can tell!

A thing I also do sometimes I’d make a perspective grid around a pose. I get pretty attached to poses. So for his panel panel I took a reference photo of myself from above and built a scene around it. I don’t recommend this for beginners but… yeah it’s a thing I do still. (Sorry, I don’t have the original reference picture anymore) but I think it definitely helps anyone understand how certain angles work.

As for interiors of space ships, I honestly just see it as a lot of repeated or dynamic shapes. You don’t need to do much to make some alright sci-fi scenes. If you look through any space or Star Wars comics a lot of the time the backgrounds it’s just like “oh, they just split this wall into asymmetrical panels and added a pipe or two and some lights.” As you can see, I do exactly that ‘cause again… I’m lazy 😂

If it’s a repeated shape I just make a flat version of the pattern then transform it into my grid. Like these fucking floor oval things at are everywhere in the star wars universe.

Work smart and use all the tools at your disposal to work faster 👍🏻 if you want to see someone go more in depth with a lot of these techniques I highly recommend checking out some of Ethan Becker’s videos on YouTube. He’s a brutally honest animator and he gives what I think are some very helpful tips to people who are intimidated by the industry or furthering their artistic practice.

But yeah... practice perspective and use reference to help you understand! And also random shapes. And also don’t be afraid to fuck up! Try things! You can’t learn if you don’t fail!

Hope this helped! I’m bad at explaining these kind of things 😅

[zackcollins]

like a train through a house of glass ch. 2 || carter hart

chapter 1

Author’s Note: Well. I’m apparently in a mood to write because I finished chapter 2 on the same night as chapter 1. To space things out a little, I scheduled this to be posted today at 11:00 am instead of last night when I finished it. I just didn’t want to overwhelm you with content since I’ve written like. 2 complete one-shots and now 2 chapters of this in less than 5 days. I know a lot of you love my writing, but I really don’t want to smother you or something. If you actually want me to post stuff as fast as I finish it, let me know because I will, in fact, do that if it’s what you want. I want to keep my readers happy! GIF credit goes to the original creator!!

Warnings: The same mention of the paralysis as last time. It doesn’t just evaporate; paralysis doesn’t roll like that... usually. There’s a brief mention of both Carter and the reader being disrobed but it’s nothing serious. If you want a spoiler, they’re disrobed for a shower, not anything naughty or explicit. Once again, there’s a swear word or two if that bothers you.

Word Count: 2.0k+

Title: Crash by Chad Brownlee

Additional: It was a little harder this time but I managed to make the language gender-neutral again!! I started the train on that track and I plan to keep it there. The Leafs will win the Stanley Cup before I derail the train. The Leafs can please win the Stanley Cup though... Leafs fan 5ever.

You jolted awake when you heard the Flyers goal horn blaring in the bedroom. Rubbing your eyes, you noticed that the bed was empty. Wiggling toward the nightstand, you grabbed Carter’s phone and turned the alarm off. It was then that you heard the shower in the en suite.

“Ah, there’s my sleepyhead,” Carter said, appearing in the doorway of the bathroom. He wasn’t wearing any clothes, save for his shower shoes.

“Honey, hey,” you yawned, stretching your arms above your head. You ran your fingers through your hair, cringing at how dry and brittle it felt. “Do you have time to help me shower?”

Nodding, Carter made his way across the room. He slid the blanket off you before hooking an arm under your legs and one under your shoulders. 

“Ready, (Y/N)?” Carter asked, looking cautiously at you. No matter how many times you had done this in the last month, he was always scared he would drop you.

As you nodded, Carter lifted you off the bed and into his arms. To help steady him, you swung your arms around his neck; that levelled Carter’s centre of gravity a little, making the walk to the bathroom smoother.

When you arrived in the bathroom, Carter placed you on your stool. He bent down, hooking his fingers in the waist of your pyjama pants. At the same time that he pulled your pants off, you pulled your shirt over your head. 

When he moved you from the stool to the shower seat, you melted into the heat of the water.

“Fuck… that feels so good on my shoulders,” you said, rolling your shoulders to prove your point.

Carter took some of the body wash and squirted it into his palms. He lathered it along the front of your body, making sure to dig extra hard in the wrinkle crevices.

By the time Carter was done lathering the front of you with the body wash, parts of you were tingling from the pressure he had placed on you; parts of you that you had previously thought to be completely broken.

Tears rolled down your cheeks as you held your head in your hands. Carter bent down, rubbing along your shoulder blades.

“Babe,” Carter stated, looking at you concerned. “Are you alright? Is this about not being able to do most of this yourself again?”

Shaking your head, you looked hesitant at Carter. “Move your hand below my stomach and press as hard as you can.”

Confused, Carter obeyed the command. Even with the heat from the shower, his hand left a giant red mark on your skin. You immediately started crying harder, leaning what you could toward Carter. Carter, still confused, held you as you cried.

You cried while the water went cold. You cried while Carter turned the water off. You cried while Carter towelled you off. You cried while Carter put you in fresh clothes. You only stopped crying when Carter got your shoes on to leave for practice.

“I felt it when you pressed your hand into my back,” you whispered as Carter was tying one of your shoes.

Fumbling the lace, the knot he had been tying came undone in his hand. Carter dropped the lace and looked at you. Your eyes met with dual looks of hope; both of you smiled. Carter wrapped you in a hug, kissing you once you broke apart.

“That’s amazing, (Y/N),” Carter said, wiping a few stray tears from his eyes. “Do you want me to call the doctor to schedule an appointment sooner than the one you already have?” He leaned back down to tie your shoe. 

“If you think you could get me in sooner,” you smiled, running your fingers through Carter’s hair. 

When he finished tying your shoes, he stood back and opened the door for you. Smiling, you wheeled yourself out. As you both made your way toward the parking garage, Joel flagged you down.

“Carter, (Y/N),” he said, panting. “Could you give me a ride today? I can’t find my license anywhere.”

“Yeah, we can do that,” Carter smiled, motioning Joel toward the parking garage.

“You’re lifesavers.” Joel squeezed both you and Carter on the shoulder. You chuckled and Carter rolled his eyes.

When you got to Carter’s car, you looked between your boyfriend and Joel. Joel smiled, looking at Carter.

“I got this,” he said, swinging the car door open. “You do it all the time; it’s about time someone else had a turn.”

Carter blinked as he locked the wheels of your wheelchair. “I do it all the time because I’m (Y/N)’s boyfriend; it’s kinda my job.”

Joel hooked an arm under your legs and one under your shoulders. “Still. Even boyfriends deserve a break every once in a while.” Joel smiled as he lifted you from your wheelchair smoothly. You and Carter shared a flabbergasted look when Joel effortlessly transitioned you from his arms to the car. “And there you go.”

“Thanks, Joel,” you said, smiling as you buckle your seatbelt. 

Joel gave a cheeky grin and some finger guns in response before turning to your wheelchair. You chuckled and rolled your eyes. When Joel bent down to release one of the folding mechanisms in your wheelchair, you noticed that Carter was looking at you with pure, unadulterated horror. All you could do was shrug and laugh dismissively. Carter did chuckle at that which made a soft sensation fill your stomach. You blinked and grabbed your stomach.

“Uh… (Y/N)?” Joel sounded confused when he spoke.

You snapped your head in his direction, noticing him and Carter giving you lopsided stares. Moving your hands from your stomach, you ran one hand down your face and the other along the back of your neck.

“Sorry, it’s just…” you trailed off, unsure if you wanted Joel to know this. You weren’t as close with Joel as you were with some of the other guys. If you were honest with yourself, you had always pictured Travis or Nolan being the next person to find out any big news about your current situation. Sighing, you decided Joel deserved as much respect as anyone on the team; he had lifted you into the car and that had to account for something.

“You know that I’m paralyzed from about the stomach down, right?” You asked; you wanted to make sure Joel knew the exact parameters of the situations. 

“Yeah, why?” Joel responded, leaning against the car. “Carter has mentioned it several times. He talks about how much he loves you and how caring for you is preparing him to be a father.”

Whatever you wanted to say to Joel instantly died on your tongue. You looked at Carter who was decidedly not looking at you. He was staring at his shoes and fiddling with the drawstrings on his hoodie.

Joel coughed which caused Carter to look at you. He had a look on his face that was halfway between embarrassment and sincerity. You blinked, feeling tears making their way to the surface. You quickly wiped them away before averting your glance from Carter and Joel.

“Is everything okay?” A voice echoed through the parking garage. Your upper torso jolted a little out of fear. 

Carter and Joel turned their attention toward the direction of the voice, both raising a hand in salute. You tilted your head in confusion. When the person appeared beside Carter, you relaxed and smiled at them.

“Morgan, hi,” you said, raising a hand in greeting.

Morgan smiled, waving at you. “(Y/N)! How’re you feeling? Is your injury healing okay? Carter said you were still waiting on the results of your last CT scan.”

“The doctor called earlier,” you bit your lip, looking past Morgan. Carter was standing there, nodding. Focusing your attention back to Joel and Morgan, you breathed shakily. “She said the injury wasn’t as bad as originally thought. I went from 5% to 50% probability of regaining at least a partial feeling of my lower extremities.” 

Morgan grabbed your hands, squeezing them. “That’s awesome! I’m so happy for you!”

Instead of squeezing your hands, Joel squeezed your midsection. You gave him a questioning eyebrow which turned thankful when you felt a pinprick sensation in your belly button. Joel noticed the look on your face, this time grabbing your hand. He squeezed and at the same time, he squeezed your shoulder.

“I hope this works out for you,” Joel said, leaning out of the car and making his way into the passenger seat. Once he was in and had his seatbelt buckled, he looked over his shoulder at you. “The guys love you; Carter loves you. You deserve this.”

You glanced at Morgan; he was nodding. “Joel is right. We all love you, (Y/N). Carter especially. You’re the best thing to happen to him since he won World Junior gold.” Morgan squeezed your shoulder before walking away.

Looking at Carter, you noticed that his face was decidedly red because he had been crying. 

“Morgan!” You called out, hoping he would hear you. When he appeared in front of you, you heaved a sigh of relief. “Could you drive us to practice today? Carter needs to sit with me and Boo Boo the Fool there lost his license.” You made a vague gesture in front of you. Joel grunted but made no word of disagreement with your statement.

Nodding, Morgan grabbed the keys from Carter. Carter mumbled something that you didn’t hear; Morgan smiled which lead you to believe he had heard whatever it was. Before Morgan walked to the driver seat, he closed the door for you. You thanked him to which he hummed his appreciation. A moment later, Carter appeared in the seat beside you. You jolted because you hadn’t seen him move from his spot outside the car. Carter mumbled an apology; you shrugged it off because you weren’t angry at him. As soon as Carter and Morgan were buckled in, Morgan began the drive to practice.

Carter leaned against you, placing his head on your shoulder. You brought your arm around him, carefully rubbing his side. Carter hummed, nuzzling closer. You noticed Joel’s eyes and a soft smile in the rearview mirror. You smiled softly back, giving him a thumbs up. 

On the ice, Carter might be rough and tumble. When he was at home with you, he was the exact opposite. He was the personification of soft and sweet. As much as he cared for you, he needed his own level of care. You were happy to oblige that to whatever extent you were able; you wanted this relationship to be mutually beneficial. Carter knew the kind of care you needed; you never knew what kind of care he needed which is what usually made Carter the one that was the needier of the two of you.

None of that mattered to you though. You loved him and he loved you. You had been making this relationship work for a year before the accident; the accident had just caused new challenges that you would have to work through. For the most part, you were handling it pretty well.

While Carter laid with his head on your shoulder and two of his teammates sat in the front seats, you couldn’t help but think of how vulnerable this made you feel. You had never been one to show any level of affection in front of other people. You had always reserved your affections with a partner for when it was just the two of you.

As all that was going through your head, another thought was right alongside it: you didn’t care who saw anymore. You loved Carter and he loved you. It shouldn’t matter what other people thought; if they can’t handle Carter dating someone in a wheelchair then they aren’t worth either of your time.

You pressed a kiss to the top of Carter’s head and let the thoughts permeate. You would be sharing them with Carter soon; it was about time that people outside of the team knew about your relationship. Carter had friends on other teams.

You were ready to tell them.

[j0ebay]

Kiss Me Goodbye... Chapter 7

Warning(s): swearing,  this is probably trash tbh

Word Count: 3891

A/N: At long long last this chapter is hecking done!!! I’m really super duper sorry this took 5ever to come out. BUT I’m really stoked this chapter is finally out so enjoy and feedback is deeply appreciated!! 💙

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chapter 6     chapter 8

an extra thank you to @starksmile for the amazing moodboard!!

“Now he’s gone. I don’t know why and to this day sometimes I cry. He didn’t even say goodbye. He didn’t take the time to lie.” -Nancy Sinatra

The following morning, Lindsey wakes up with arms wrapped around her. She looks down and smiles to see the same bandaged hands from last night meeting together at her hip. She lightly chuckles- Harrison was always a cuddler. Lindsey slowly pries his hands off her and makes her way down the stairs to the kitchen. Treks over to the fridge, passing a distracted Harry Holland, sitting at the kitchen table, typing away on his laptop.

“Did you eat?” She asks, breaking the brunette from his trance.

“Nah,” He mumbles, still deep in concentration.

“Well I’m gonna make some eggs ‘n toast. Should I add you to the order?” She asks in a soft tone.

Harry scoffs.

“You really are a fuckin waitress aren’t you?” He looks up from his laptop. “Sounds great, Linds. Thank you,” He adds sincerely.

Lindsey lets out a breathy chuckle.

“Gimme a break, Holland. You guys stole me from my job,” Earning another laugh from Harry.

There's a few minutes of comfortable silence before Lindsey walks over to him with another cup of tea and the plate of food.

“Am I allowed to know what you’re so diligently searching?” She asks.

Harry lets out a sigh before taking a sip of tea and shoveling eggs into his mouth.

“How long have you been up anyway?” She questions, softly.

“Too long” He responds, mouth full of food.

Harry swallows and takes another sip of tea.

“And to answer your first question, it's nothing too drastic. But, if it’s one thing Gideon Fuller made me promise him, it’s not to involve you in anything until you’re ready for it.”

Lindsey lets out a heavy sigh and nods.

“If it's one thing my dad was, it’s stubborn.”

Harry scowls at the image on his computer. Chad Powell. He recognized the picture as the man who dropped you off last night. No criminal record, no blatant mafia affiliation, squeaky clean but still acting suspicious based on what he heard about the date the night prior.

“Lindsey?” Harry asks, closing his laptop slightly, shielding Lindsey from the screen.

The woman raises her eyebrows with a mouth full of eggs and toast, prompting Harry to go on.

“Do you think you’re going to keep seeing Chad?” He asks her, voice dropping a few octaves and decibels.

“Your tone concerns me, Mr. Holland,” She responds, “Please continue”

Harry sighs.

“I mean, what ever happened with Harrison? Last time I checked, you were, like, madly in love with him. And, granted the last time I checked was high school but it still seems like it.”

“I wouldn’t call it madly in love with him. And what? You don’t like him?” She asks, eyebrow quirked.

She wasn’t about to admit to someone she saw as her younger brother and also one of Harrison’s best friends, that seeing her old flame of sorts, especially now, ignited a fire in her that she hadn’t felt with anyone else. Now, thinking about it, that feeling seemed to fill the gap in her life she didn’t know she wanted filled. But, she wasn’t about to admit that.

Harry opens up.

“To be honest Lindsey, I don't. I don’t know what it is but something doesn’t seem right. He seemed kind of sketchy when I met him,”

Lindsey scoffs.

“Did you maybe think that he seemed sketchy when you met him because he was, I don’t know, nervous?”

Harry clenches his jaw.

“You said he checked his phone every 30 minutes or so to send updates right? Lindsey, we do that when we’re doing meetings and things with other bosses. I can’t imagine why he would do that other than that reason”

“Harry, I don’t know if it’s because he’s making me happy for the first time in a while, or because it’s not Haz. But, I like this guy a lot and it’s really shitty of you to not only dictate who I go out with but try to justify it by him being shady, WHICH HE IS NOT BY THE WAY”

Lindsey sighs and pinches her nose.

“I-I just don’t know. Everything is just too much right now”

Harry meets her gaze.

“Do you still love him?” He murmurs, barely above earshot.

“What’s too much?” Asks the gravelly, sleep ridden voice of Harrison Osterfield.

Lindsey and Harry whip their heads around. There they see the sweatshirt clad, wispy haired man, standing at the open refrigerator.

“Juice?” He turns around and asks the two at the table.

“I’m good- I thought you were still sleeping?” Lindsey deflects.

Harrison sighs, sets down his glass of orange juice to the right of Lindsey and wraps his arms around her sitting figure.

“The bed got cold” He mutters into her neck.

Harry raises his eyebrows at the girl and she rolls her eyes at him.

 “So complete 180” Lindsey starts as Harrison sits down.

Tom struts into the room already dressed and makes himself a cup of tea.

“180 from what, darling?”” He asks. 

“Okay great you’re all here cause I’ve been sitting on something ever since,” She pauses to gesticulate in the air.

“Since I found out about your, uh-”

“-Business?” Tom asks, playfully.

Lindsey stifles her laughter.

“So um, you guys are saying I’m in danger and I have no clue what the hell my dad made you promise to him for you guys to swoop back into my life and play knights in shining armor. Which I’m grateful for, don't get me wrong, thank you so much for all of this. To put it bluntly, do you guys have any idea how long I’ll be staying here?”

All the boys smiles’ drop. Harrison reaches for her hand.

“I dunno Linds,” Tom sighs.

Harry chimes in.

“We’ve started to narrow things down, but it’s just been the usual suspects in the pool” He mutters, running his fingers through his curly hair.

“Which isn’t necessarily a bad thing” Harrison chimes in.

“How?” Lindsey scoffs.

Harrison bites the inside of his cheek, contemplating if he should go on or not.

“Please someone tell me how this isn’t terrible?” She asks barely above a whisper, rubbing her thumb across his hand.

Harrison squeezes her hand in response.

“I-It’s just, we haven’t heard anything about you in our, well, work community. So it’s not a bad thing that no one’s actively targeting you. But it’s also a matter of ‘Are people keeping their plans about you under wraps? Do they really not know about you? Was whoever was following you that night just some John who liked what they saw and we’re all just being paranoid?’ Y’know?”

Lindsey nods, thoughtfully.

“So it’s going to be a while isn’t it?” Lindsey asks, feeling everything in her chest sink to her feet.

“Probably” Tom responds somberly.

He tries to find the glimmer of hope he always finds in her eyes, but he just can’t.

“W-What about my job? Do I at least get to call them and say ‘Hey something’s come up and I can’t be coming in for a while’? Do I get to say goodbye to my kids? Do I get to wish them luck on the show they’re working so diligently on? Or am I just gonna have someone from your “mob” following me constantly like a protective detail?” Lindsey questions on the brink of tears.

“We’ll take care of it, darling. Don’t worry everything will be taken care of” Harrison soothes, squeezing her hand again.

“Well can I at least go get the rest of my stuff? I only have stuff for the week that you guys got” Lindsey asks.

Maybe if she could just go home she could feel more at peace with the situation.

“That Chris guy knew exactly where you lived. It's a public record. The last thing any of us needs is some guy surprising you when you’re alone in your room” Tom exhales, rubbing his temples.

Lindsey’s heart drops as she feels tears well in her eyes.

“Linds I’ll take you shopping or something. It’ll be great. We could talk about literally anything. Plus, you always talked about the joys of retail therapy” Harry adds, trying to take her mind off of things.

While Harry and Lindsey leave to go shopping, Harrison is tasked with making sure everyone’s paying up on time, everything is in order and that his best mob boss friend isn’t carrying too much work on his shoulders. He knocks on the door with the gold plate reading “Tom Holland” and enters.

“How’s it going man?” Harrison asks the brown eyed mobster.

Tom nods and responds.

“Pretty good, I guess. Nothing is outright troublesome other than the stuff we already know about. Everything in your field normal?”

Harrison nods.

“Good, good,” Tom mutters.

“Maybe all the douchebags and lowlifes decided to take the day off” Harrison suggests, prompting the two men to laugh.

“So,” Tom starts, breaking the silence.

“So?” Harrison asks in response.

“You’re getting pretty close with Lindsey, there” 

Harrison raises his eyebrows “And?”

Tom runs a hand through his hair.

“Is this going to be a repeat of high school?”

Harrison eyebrows snap together.

“What do you mean?” “Mate, you wouldn’t shut up about her. Both of you wouldn’t shut up about each other, in fact. And none of you would make real moves on each other” Tom chuckles. 

“Anyway,” Harrison says just a little too quickly. “Any headway on who was trying to get into your parents’ stuff?”

Tom lets out a heavy sigh and shakes his head

“Ten bucks says it’s one of Harding’s guys. But, there’s nothing to actually back that up so until then...,” he trails off and shrugs.

Harrison nods as Tom continues.

“I mean, my main concern is Lindsey. Like don’t get me wrong, my parents are fine, my dad’s still got some tricks up his sleeve and they’re the ones with the dog. But Linds on the other hand-”

“She only has us and no knowledge of protocol whatsoever” Harrison interjects.

“I mean don’t get me wrong she has all the self defense stuff she learned from Gideon. But, my main concern is, will it be enough to keep her all safe ‘n feisty if and when she gets affiliated with us?” Tom asks.

Harrison’s eyebrows knit together.

“Do you think she’ll be a long term partner?” Harrison asks, directing his gaze upwards at Tom.

He sighs and shrugs his shoulders

“I honestly don’t know. She seemed pretty horrified when she found out about us. But now, she seems to be warming up to it. She just seemed more concerned about our safety than anything else. I guess it all depends on when you get a ring on that girl’s finger” Tom chuckles at his own joke.

Harrison shoots Tom a knowing glance and flips him off.

“So, nothing else on your end you need help with?”

Harry and Lindsey sit in the food court of the crowded mall, indulging in their lunches.

“So what kinda shit do you need anyway?” Harry yells to Lindsey, trying to speak over the loads of people surrounding them.

“It depends,” Lindsey responds following a heavy sigh.

Harry has a puzzled look written all over his face. Anyone can read that man like a book. “On what?” He questions.

“Well,” Lindsey trails off, trying to contain her laughter.

“How comfortable are you going into Victoria’s Secret?”

Harry chokes on his food.

“What could you possibly need from Victoria’s Secret?”

Lindsey finally cracks up in hysterical laughter.

“Lingerie for Harrison, duh” Lindsey jokes between laughs.

Harry covers his ears.

“TMI TMI TMI lalalalala I can’t hear you” Harry partially yells.

Lindsey laughs even harder than before.

“Harry, you know I’m kidding. I just need the basic bras, panties, that kinda thing. Which, in all honesty if you’re not cool with going in there or if we get kicked out, I’m one million percent okay with going somewhere else” She explains.

Harry lets out a small chuckle. He can’t believe he forgot how conscious and caring for other people Lindsey is.

“I’m fine going in there but I can’t promise we’ll be in there for very long. But, then again, I have no idea- You alright, Linds?”

That last sentence was a blur. All Lindsey could feel was tingles in the back of her neck while only hearing the nagging of her subconscious.

“Turn around. Someone’s watching you”

“Turn over your right shoulder. There’s someone watching you. You’re in danger. Danger. Danger”

“Lindsey?” Harry asks.

Lindsey whips her head back around to face her friend.

“What?” She questioned, clearly zoned out of the conversation.

Harry sighs.

“You know he can’t hurt you anymore”

Lindsey nods, still distant.

“Linds, repeat after me. Chris Maxwell is dead. He can’t get to you anymore” Harry insists.

He hates seeing his friend like this. “Then why do I still feel eyes on me?” She mutters taking a look around the food court once more.

Harry scans the room, trying to see if anyone is being blatant about watching her. 

“I don’t see anyone, Lindsey. C’mon let's go grab some more things you need, yeah? I know Tom said no apartment but maybe I can run and grab some things for ya if you want” He encourages.

Lindsey’s eyes light up.

“Really? Cause there was this super cute silver bodycon dress that I totally left there and if this whole thing clears up or maybe if I end up going out with Chad again I could wear that”

Harry chuckles. 

“You’re really into this Chad guy huh?” 

Lindsey sighs and clears her burgundy hair out of her face.

“I dunno, Har. Like I love Haz ‘n all but there’s no real moves made y’know. It’s all sweet words and cuddles with him. But it’s hard to gauge if he actually feels, or I guess felt, things for me or if that’s just how he expresses friendship. Chad on the other hand, is actually making moves and expressing things, y’know?.”

Harry nods, understanding. She pauses and checks her phone.

“Especially now,” She adds, “Because he just asked me to dinner tonight”

Harry’s eyes widen.

“Dang”

He pulls out his phone and writes out a text to Harrison.

Harry Holland() Mate, I have no idea wtf is going on between you and Linds. But if you still feel things for her you gotta make real moves and fast cause she just thinks its friendly shit

“Alright. Where next m’lady?”

Harry asks, offering his hand to a giggling Lindsey.

Harry was a good distraction for her. That was obvious. But somehow somewhere, Lindsey was still hearing her subconscious whisper

“Look over your left shoulder. Someone’s got their eyes on you. Just turn, turn, turn” And once again, she obliges to her thoughts. 

Harrison looks at his phone and sighs. Harry has just confirmed what has been nagging in the back of his mind ever since he saw her for the first time in the diner. He turns his head around when he heard the front door open and shut.

“Hello?” He hears the angelic voice of Lindsey grace the household. 

“What did you get, love?” Harrison asks, looking at the bags in her hand.

“I think I have successfully traumatized the big, scary mobster, Harry Holland” She giggles as his cheeks turn a bright crimson.

Harrison’s eyebrows snap together in confusion.

“Whadya mean?”

Lindsey says nothing and holds up the square Victoria’s Secret bag. Harrison mouth forms into a silent “Oh” 

She giggles and runs upstairs with her things.

“How is she?” Harrison asks with a quirked eyebrow.

“As expected, I guess” Harry murmurs.

“What do you mean?” Harrison asks, voice full of concern.

“She still keeps looking over her shoulder. She’s convinced that someone’s following her” Harry sighs.

“Well, this isn't necessarily cause she ‘has me in her pocket’,” Harrison starts, making air quotes.

“But, is it really that irrational of a thing to think of? I mean, need I remind you that someone tried to find information on Gideon Fuller’s whole family? Not just Gideon but Denise and Lindsey as well”

Harry’s eyebrows raise.

“You think it’s the same person?”

“It could very much be” Harrison responds, eyes wide like saucers in realization that he was onto something.

“You go take care of her, I’ll fill Tom in,” Harry says and speeds off to his brother’s office.

The unidentified brunette man sits in his hotel room, fresh out of the shower. Hair wet, towel on his waist, he decides to get himself into some clothes. Now clad in a black v neck, fitting his muscles perfectly and some plaid pajama pants, the man haphazardly dries his hair and looks over the files sitting on the polished table. He’s pulled out of his concentrated state by the familiar sound of his ringtone.

“Yeah,” he answers, voice raspy as he hadn't had much to say.

“Yeah I have eyes on her,” He confirms, smirking at the master plan.

“No, boss, they have no idea,” The man reassures with whoever is on the other line.

“The only one posing a somewhat threat to the plan is the right hand, Osterfeld” He briefs the person as well as going through it for himself.

“Problem? No. Definitely not. I can easily neutralize him,” He boasts

“Yeah,” He confirms.

“The second he gets in my way he’s getting taken out. This information on Fuller is too good to pass up”

As Lindsey goes on her date, Harrison is in Tom’s office, plotting. Tom glances over at his right hand man to see him gazing off into the distance. Harrison can’t stop thinking of Lindsey, his Lindsey, looking absolutely stunning on the dress Harry brought for her. Her burgundy hair was straight, her makeup was done, she looked flawless as per usual. But, she’s always flawless. Chad probably doesn’t see that. Chad doesn’t deserve a beauty like her. Who does he even think he is?

“Harrison,” Tom says, snapping him out of his trance.

Harrison trains his bright blue eyes on his best friend and right away Tom knows something’s up. “Alright, man. Spill. Where’s your head at?”

Harrison sighs and runs a hand through his hair.

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy she’s happy. But what did this Chad guy even do to deserve to go out with her? She’s so gorgeous and funny and perfect. And Harry texted me earlier and basically said I needed to make my move because she was teetering between me and him. Tom, what if I’m too late?” He pauses as he starts to feel himself choke up.

“W-what if this is the man she’s gonna marry and I’m left high and dry? I know there have been girls in the past and like you always say there’s women throwing themselves at us being ‘dangerous sexy mobsters’ or whatever. But I don’t want anyone else. I want her” 

In all the years of friendship and partnership between Harrison and Tom, Tom has never seen Harrison get choked up like this. Tom lets out a sigh, breaking the silence.

“I mean,” He begins, pausing to wet his lips and find the correct words to console his friend with.

“It’s clear she loves you. Whether it's seen as platonic love or more than that, that’s up to you two. However, as much as it hurts, it’s not up to you to decide who she dates and this Chad guy seems to make her pretty happy. But, then again, so do you. It’s kind of a rough process trying to decipher this, man. Try not to think about it too much,”

Harrison nods and sniffles.

“What do I do?” He inquires his best friend.

“If it were me, I would come clean to her. Tell her everything you just told me. Because, if it’s one thing I know about Lindsey Fuller’s feelings about you, it’s confusion. She doesn’t know if all the PDA you guys do is platonic or something else. But, it’s not me, it’s you. So, it’s not my place to tell you how to go about this,”

The blue eyed man nods to Tom.

“But,” Tom continues, “Right now, we can’t change that she’s on her date. So, good that we got all her feeling out but let's figure out who’s meddling in our crime family”

Harrison makes his way up to his bedroom. He had heard Lindsey enter the house, but, he was so caught up in the work he and Tom had started. This is it. Harrison is going to confess what has been eating at him since he first saw her. As he walks up the stairs to his room, he gives himself a small pep talk.

“You got this, Osterfield,” He thinks to himself.

“Tom said she’s into you, Harry insists she’s into you. Why would she not be into you?”

He opens the door to his bedroom, the gateway of so many sweet and caring memories between the two of them, only to see Lindsey... packing her things?

“Hey” He greets her, voice unintentionally giving hints of confusion and startling her from her mind.

“Oh! Hey” Lindsey gasps.

“You scared me!” She giggles brushing stray hairs out of her face.

“How was the date?” Harrison asks gently, not wanting to startle her any more.

Lindsey smiles that sweet smile making Harrson’s knees weak every single time.

“It was really good actually,” She beams before continuing “How’s everything here?” Lindsey asks him.

“Ugh it’s full of work. But, it’s good work, y’know? We do the shit law enforcement won’t- What are you doing?” Harrison asks as she continues to pack her things.

“Oh sorry, I’m still listening, don't worry! I’m just packing up” She answers pausing to bashfully scratch the back of her neck.

“Why, darling?” Harrison queries, walking over to grab both her hands

“I’m-uh, I think I’m gonna stay in the guest room from now on, Haz” Lindsey mumbles, finding a new fascination with the floor.

“Any reason why you’re moving out of here?” Harrison questions, trying and failing to find her gaze.

“Yeah I just- I just don’t want to be weighing you down by staying in your room and um...” She trails off.

Harrison brings his index finger to her chin and lifts her head up to meet his gaze.

“And what, love?” He asks, ocean eyes full of concern.

“Haz,” She whispers, while moving away from him and shaking her head.

“We can’t do this anymore, Harrison” She murmurs, shakily.

Harrison feels a hard pang in his chest like his heart is causing him physical pain. His head feels like it’s spinning and all he wants to do is wake up with his girl next to him “W-Why?” He asks, barely above a whisper.

“Harrison, Chad and I are a thing now. And, all the PDA stuff we do, I-I just I don’t wanna piss him off or offend him y’know?” She explains.

All Harrison can do is nod as Lindsey continues.

“You know I love you, Hazza and everything we do for each other. But, that stuff can be easily misinterpreted”

Harrison nods again.

“I hope he makes you happy” He chokes out, voice cracking just a little.

And with that, the girl of his dreams leaves his bedroom, confirming his worst nightmare has become a reality.

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[graysonhq-blog]

IT’S TOO COLD FOR YOU HERE  — AN INTRODUCTION.

MWAH hello yall cuties :”)) i’m lucy i’m 9teen i just spent the afternoon staring @ my blemishes n wondering if i should spend the $115 for the foreo luna mini ! but sdsdsj before i get distracted n start ranting abt myself, let me tell u about this trash bag aka grayson easton via this messy af intro xxxxxxx

- ̗̀ ❛ GREGG SULKIN, HE/HIM. ❜ ̖́- is that grayson easton getting out of their car blasting the new year by death cab? i heard they’re twenty five years old and they’ve been living in scarsdale for twelve years. i mean, i’m not surprised –– i hear their family’s networth is 800k. everyone’s always said they’re pretty industrious and disciplined, but rumor has it they can be deceitful and rigid, too.

so grayson easton was conceived when thomas easton aka international millionaire couldn’t contain his dick @ a medical conference 🍆💦 but even though it wasn’t necessarily how lauren hannigan imagined starting a family, she was still excited

she already understood that he wouldn’t be v involved (because smh his ass already had a family and was too high profile to risk exposing himself as a cheater), but it didn’t matter to her ! after all,  she just finished her residency program and was gong to *lil wayne vc* cash money make it rain ! lordt she was so HYPE she was close to spending a small fortune on little einstein storybooks 👀

but she never got the opportunity to read him those stories because a complication during her labour meant she passed away before she even had the opportunity to see her son—and because she wasn’t interested in involving his father (and honestmeme it wasn’t like he was knocking down doors to bring home his son), custody went to her parents, tessa and charles hannigan

they were fantastic guardians like clearly they were so distraught when their daughter passed away, but they decided to take all the love they couldn’t give her and direct it towards their grandson

he had a lemonade stand up every month, and his grandfather spent hours helping him make the posters and decorate the table before sitting out in the heat with him :”) it was called gray’s and grayson’s lemonade

they took turns helping charlie work through his dyslexia and brought him to the library regularly 💕 they were adamant about showing him that he wasn’t stupid just because he needed to work ten times harder than everyone to understand things, that he could do everything everyone else can do and more if he tried hard enough

also tessa taught him how to play the guitar and they spent v many fuzzy afternoons doing bad covers of sesame street songs shshsjs

but everything started going downhill when grayson turned ten—at that point, his grandparents were already p advanced in age, and that ultimately meant that their health was always v precarious :// before he could process what was happening, tessa was diagnosed w stage three breast cancer that showed no indication of slowing down—and all of a sudden, he was spending his nights doing homework in her hospital room and sleeping on the tiny chair near her bed because he refused to leave 

( tessa was always miserable in the hospital, but always brightened whenever he told her that he won a poetry competition or that his teacher put a sticker on his latest test because he got a hundred percent and he just wanted to make her happy ahhhh )

he was doing homework the evening she passed away in the surgery room—and after that, it was tbh emotional earthquake after emotional earthquake because the shock was too much for his grandfather, who died from a heart attack a few days after 

he’d barely processed what happened before his father ended up in the picture again—his father was concerned that the press would find the story, and he was smart enough to know that everyone discovering how he abandoned his bastard son would not be great press—and before he knew it, he was wrenched form his family home in maine, with only a few cardboard boxes in his arms, and dropped into this wildly privileged lifestyle in scarsdale, new york 

he soon became the center of immense gossip :/ because of his spontaneous appearance onto the otherwise exclusive setting of high class new york, people considered him a “leeching bastard son” who was only interested in getting his hands on some fortune

but he never felt that he could actually say something about his circumstances to his father smh at that point, he’d lost so many loved ones consecutively that he was desperate for someone that he could consider family, even if it meant steadfastly ignoring the genuinely shitty things about his father

he started attending first class institutions that cost as much as his old house’s mortgage per term, his dad gave him an allowance that made his weekly paper run money look like dust bunnies, he was introduced to businessmen and politicians and lawyers whose names he’d only heard on the evening news 

though he was already v hardworking and disciplined because he wanted to honour his grandparents and mom’s memory, his efforts to counteract the rumors that were being spread about him and his attempts to impress his detached father meant that his desperation to impress everyone became even more exacerbated 

by the time he graduated high school, he was the Golden Boy™ who sat at the popular table, got glowing comments from his teachers whenever he handed in assignments, and was celebrated as the star quarterback—but so much of his reputation was actually just constructed as a means to impress his father and as a way to please other people yikes he doesn’t even like playing football wtf

the fact that he was exposed to such a toxic environment that demanded everything from him to be considered valid and the fact that he’s so desperate for the feeling of compassion that he used to get from his family drove him to try finding validation and love in the wrong places, using the wrong ways

smh you would hope that spending time away from new york would’ve helped him become a little less reliant on other people’s opinion and more willing to be flexible but :) since finishing university and passing the bar exam, his family’s net worth dropped 200k and his father is placing even more pressure on him to help their firm get back on solid ground 

he’s doing everything he can and spending all his nights staying up late at his office, so much so that he sleeps there more than he sleeps in his still barely furnished apartment—but yikes he actually secretly hates corporate law and sometimes fantasizes about working for an non-governmental organization smh 

despite everything his father tried to make him as cold-hearted as him, his years with his grandparents meant that grayson is genuinely still such a compassionate and kind person underneath everything—he nags all his friends into eating vegetables and enjoys sneaking baby carrots into their homes and will always put everything on hold for the people that he loves and didn’t punch someone when they drunkenly vomited on his carpeted floor :”) 

but yikes he’s also repressed all the grief and trauma and bitterness that he’s experienced in his life, incorrectly thinking that his validation comes from authority figures and stubbornly ignoring anyone who suggests otherwise because “they’re just messing with me so they could be better than me” (also sidenote sometimes that bitterness manifests in some v questionable drinking n dating habits smh i hate him)

ANYMEME that’s grayson easton he’s a lil fake bitch who needs some help sdshdsjd the only person he talks 2 abt things is his corgi plz help 

oK that should b it omg if u managed 2 finish this fckn ... verbal diarrhea of an intro plz know that i love u 5ever mwah ! if ur lookin for some childhood friends n old exes n fwbs n ride or die’s n will they won’t they and tBH w/e plz hmu my ass has graduated from thirsty 2 plots to dehydrated for them oOF 

[starryseo]

youtuber!seungmin

aw im excited for this one

seungmin’s such a precious lil’ bean

Chan | Woojin | Minho | Changbin | Hyunjin | Jisung | Felix | SEUNGMIN | Jeongin

can you just imagine him for a sec

with these huGE overhead headphones

and a mic that comes out in front of his mouth

makes him feel like this badass pilot

but he looks so cute with them on bless his soul

starting off with his youtube stuff:

he deffo started his account off with the ever-cringey. . .

m i n c e c r a f t   v i d e o s

he used to unironically play them

and make videos of them all. the. time.

he was really good at making different worlds but like

c’mon

it’s minecraft, the guys had to mock it

he still plays it

and he’ll always be like

“jisung~ can you please play with me?”

and he’ll tilt his head to the side, and bite his lip a bit

and he looks so cuTE

that jisung just can’t say no

even though that completely destroys his gaming rep.

remember changbin’s diss track stuff???

didn’t think he would say anything bad about the precious lil’ thang that is seungmin???

yeah changbin just mocked his minecraft videos

honestly though seungmin just laughed and was like “what’s wrong with my videos though??”

that kinda ended changbin so he’s never made a diss track about him again

and even though the guys mock him

he still keeps the minecraft videos up

he watched a lot of walkthroughs to make those worlds, he ain’t taking the videos down now

as he grew up, he played minecraft less and less, and after meeting hyunjin in school, started playing more FPS games (first person shooters, like battlefield fyi)

he probably had a Little Big Planet phase between that transition though

he’s still getting the hang of the shooting games

he cannot play zombies for shit in call of duty though

not because he’s scared of them

but because when a hoard of zombies comes he panics and starts spray shooting horribly

so he ends up getting attacked

as well as gaming though he has a knack for singing

as he grew up he got more confident in his singing

and so he started posting song covers

his old videos used to be SO out of focus and blurry

sometimes he would put the camera in a really bad position so half his body wouldn’t even be in the frame

but because the audio was gr88

he posted it anyways

after chan saw that video though he was like

dude,,,, im here 2 help u

so chan got down and fixed seungmin‘s entire camera set-up

so seungmin has left it exactly as that

literally

he hasn't moved anything the slightest millimetre

 he even took pics in case something happened to the set-up

and he took down notes in his journal about everything that chan said as he was fixing the place

the rest of his bedroom is also really cute!!!

alongside felix, he’s the only one to have properly decorated his room and show it in his videos

read felix’s one to find out more about his mess of a room lmao

seungmin’s room is 100x neater

he hangs up pictures and fanmail that people send

aaaand since he’s 1/2 of the flower boy line!!!!!!

a lot of the pictures sent in are flower-related

a lot of flowery edits/ backgrounds

or drawings of him with flower crowns

he looks like an actual prince with a flower crown ok

he does his lil’ adorable smile every time he reads the messages ppl have written on their drawings

and he gets even happier when his mum comes into the room like “!!!! you have more mail!!!”

he’s also done a few songs together with woojin and those videos are so amazing bc???

woojin + seungmin + guitar + breathtaking vocals + good camera quality = h e a v e n

they both have such beautiful voices and they compliment each other really well

back to the gaming stuff:

this one time seungmin actually got higher on the scoreboard than hyunjin and everyone was like :000000 SEUNGMIN PLACED FIRST?????

they later found out that it was actually minho playing lmfao

and so hyunjin demanded a rematch buuuut

seungmin deadass said “nah i haven’t got time for n00bs like you”

r.i.p hwang hyunjin’s pride

SEUNGMIN FELT LIKE SUCH A BADASS THOUGH HE TOOK A MINUTE TO JUST PAT HIMSELF ON THE BACK <3333

the guys were holleringggg when they found out lmao

and they don’t let hyunjin live this down

so he’s basically sworn revenge and has made it his life’s goal to obliterate seungmin in a game now

and then the day came that seungmin was like

ok, i’ll fight you, but in a game of my choice

and hyunjin was so desperate to beat him he was just like okkkk

finally!!!!

obviously, MAJOR THROWBACKKK, seungmin picked minecraft

they had a week until the battle would commence

so both boys were playing non-stop minecraft in preparation

felix was just like “damn and you guys call me extra???”

the day of the fight!!!!

seungmin had chosen the Battle mini game

(a quick rundown: each player starts somewhere on the map, there are treasure chests everywhere in the map (and like 5 chests in the middle). you gotta collect weapons, armour, food and potions from the chests because you gotta fight the other person before the time runs out)

seungmin figured that hyunjin would run to the chests in the middle so instead

he ran to the chests near his hiding place

(yeah, he knows all the maps like the back of his hand)

and he got decent resources from there (a bow and a few arrows, some apples, 2 regeneration potions and a mixture of armour)

there was still enough time so he ran to a couple more chests before the showdown began and he had to fight hyunjin

MEANWHILE

(as seungmin correctly guessed) hyunjin ran to the middle of the map to get to the 5 treasure chests

and he racked up a lot of food, armour, a couple of diamond swords and some shitty potions

when the showdown began he moved to one corner of the map so he could try to find seungmin

and seungmin knew that eventually, once hyunjin couldn’t see him, he would get annoyed and start searching for seugmin

so he waited like 30 more secs before he saw hyunjin’s character moving around the map

almost near the end of the countdown,,,,

and neither had fought yet lmao

but seungmin was quite high up and hyunjin hadn’t managed to spot him yet (or find a way to get to higher ground)

so riiight when hyunjin was below seungmin he started shooting his arrows lmao

and hyunjin, being startled, jumped down quickly

wrong move !!!!

because seungmin could still shoot at him

and then when hyunjin had run away seungmin jumped down

and he swapped to his diamond pickaxe and

whilst hyunjin was looking up trying to find him

seungmin literally stabbed him in the back with his axe

so hyunjin quickly turned around with his sword

managed to get a few hits

but

ultimately

seungmin won

yOOOO the boys were screamingggg

seungmin had actually beat hyunjin fair and square lmfao

jeongin, felix, and woojin were with seungmin

and jisung, chan, changbin and minho were with hyunjin

yeah they were in separate houses

so that nobody screenwatched

(they took it that seriously)

felix skyped jisung just so that hyunjin could see them all partying and laughing whilst hyunjin was just there like

my gaming rep is now non-existent

minecraft boi actually beat me

he’s lowkey proud of seungmin bc damn he planned his attack so well

but still

he stabbed him in the back man

it was still hilarious to watch

they all went out to celebrate the next day

changbin amde a lil’ rap about how shit hyunjin is at gaming now

and after that seugmin actually posted the video of him slaying hyunjin’s ass

within the first minute of seugmin posting that video there was one dislike

from a certain salty hwang hyunjin

he’s now made it his plan to improve in a game that hyunjin’s great at so he can beat him at that too

but that’s gonna take a while lmao

so yeah, although hyunjin will 5ever be salty that he got beat by seungmin

he still looks out for him like he’s his lil’ bro

it’s so cute honestly

and they’re always hanging out with each other in school now

practically inseparable

&& although the guys mocked him for his minecraft vids

he knows they still love him and they’re basically all just older bros to him that are always there for him to depend on

and there’s jeongin as his lil’ bro he can be the youngster with

they pretty much always act cute to get the older guys to do their bidding

secretly evil maknaes

only one more left them im?? done??? im gonna miss this series tbfh :’(