#it's literally that I realized after much pain and trial and error that 'oh shit the way I like boys is as a boy'

[anothertimdrakestan]

How DARE You Go And Die On Me???  - Jason Todd x Reader Soulmate AU -

Words: 2.1k

Requested? Yes! From a lovely anon!

“Jason Todd x reader soulmate AU pleasssse where when you touch them with skin for the first time there’s sparkly lights that only you and your soulmate see or something and you feel really warm and your soulmate glows or something? Thank you ❤️”

LINK TO PROMPTS  -> REQUESTS ARE STILL OPEN!

I love this request. So much. I hope y’all enjoy this one because I really got to live out my famous science nerd dream. Thank you for the amazing request! I secretly love soulmate AU’s hehehe so please send more! Y’all are so creative with them too :)))

Soulmates were a sore subject for you. At a young age you glowed bright red, and it was the most crushing moment of your life. Soulmate glows only occurred when you touched your soulmate for the first time or when they died. Knowing this meant you would never meet your person was hard, but you hoped maybe you’d be one of the lucky ones who got a new soulmate, seeing as you were so young. But years later nothing had happened even though you stayed hopeful. Unlike so many who go off the rails once they realize there’s no one for them, you dedicated your life to researching soulmates, and it was incredibly fulfilling. As a high school intern working under a group of molecular biochemists, world renowned computer scientists, and psychiatrists you were worked towards creating a drug that made you glow in your soulmate color, it would make finding soulmates much easier and from there you could maybe make a sensor and go international with your research. Who wouldn’t want a drug that finds the person you’re meant to be with?

You’d been tracking soulmates to see if there’s any tell before they find out they are soulmates besides the glowing. It was painful to watch thousands find their life long partner but part of you hoped that by finishing this research you would be able to figure out if your soulmate was really gone, or get filthy rich trying. As just a teenager you planned on working for the company for the rest of your life, staying involved as you pursue your degree then returning, this project was growing up with you. 

As far as you knew, soulmates were drawn together. That was the only explanation as to why so many people in your tests were soulmates. There was something almost magnetic about finding your other half, and you were convinced it was chartable. There was a scientific explanation for everything. 

Finally the drug was ready, after months of blind trials and high highs and low lows it was time for the first wave of real life test runs. Grouping a couple thousand eager participants together, your team split into groups. Taking each participant into a room you gave them the drug and filled the color they glowed, and if anyone matched you’d bring them together. Of course all the interns on your team wanted to try too. 

Stepping up you couldn’t hold in excitement. Since you were only newly a teenager you hoped your soulmate color would be cool. You’d seen some amazing colors and meetings all throughout the day. It couldn’t get more exciting.

Stepping up, you took the drug and waited. 

And waited.

And waited.

But you didn’t glow. “Hey uh Y/N you did say you glowed when you were little right? Sorry to break it to yah kid but yours is gone, we’ve got a couple hundred more tests why don’t yah go home?” a voice came over the intercom, and your heart sunk. Sure some people didn’t glow either, and they all had flashed at some point. Your hope was clearly misplaced. And with a broken soul, quite literally, you went home.

Years later you’d kept with the team. The drug was almost ready to be released officially, and the public was beyond excited. You were 25 now, a huge public face for the soulmate finder, you’d stuck with the program and it had made you practically famous. Doing PR you’d brought the drug on talk shows, finding strangers their soulmate on live TV, you made special appearances to celebrities to find and log their soulmate color. Everyone that took your test had their specific color logged in a huge database, so when you tested if your perfect color matched somewhere your soulmate would get alerted. It was perfection.

Tonight you were going on television to do another round of soulmate finding with a late night host. Nothing new.

“And please welcome, Cupid Herself, Y/N!” The crowd was always full wherever you went, everyone wanted a chance at love as soon as possible. “Now I’m very sorry to disappoint the crowd but we’re bringing out some celebrities who’ve requested a chance at love... I bring you THE WAYNES!” You were a little shocked, you probably should’ve read the brief but no difference, you had enough for about ten people. Standing up you shook Bruce Wayne’s hand, moving onto the chair at the side while Bruce and three of his children walked in. “Hello! Mr. Grayson, Todd, and Ms. Brown right?” the host greeted the three and shook Bruce’s hand, no need for his introduction. 

“These three couldn’t pass up on the opportunity. As you know Mr. Drake-Wayne has found his soulmate and now husband so we couldn’t bring him! And my son Damian was erm- busy.” You saw Jason Todd snort, slightly taken aback by his actions on live television. “Can I just say, I am super excited to be here! It’s a huge honor Ms. Y/L/N this is too cool!” Stephanie got up, giving you a quick hug, you smiled, happy that she was so kind. 

“Well lets get this show on the road! I’m sure millions want to know if any of the Wayne’s are their soulmate!” the host waggled an eyebrow as the crowd cooed. This was basically a chance at the lottery, a Wayne was a ticket to riches for life. Taking the lead you gave your pitch about the drug, taking consent before grabbing a serving for four. Walking up you handed a glass to each boy, finishing with Bruce, but he refused. “Oh no, I don’t want to know” he said softly. The crowd booed, and in a bit of a panic the host said “well then how about the lovely Y/N takes a drink? We all want to know if the creator has a soulmate!” you politely told him and the crowd you’d tried before, but there was no light, explaining how you lost is when you were younger. As you saw the crowd looking upset you decided it was better than nothing.

“How about I try it guys! Maybe something’s changed - find out live here on Late Night!” you pitched into the camera and the host nodded, cutting to an ad-break.

“Does this shit actually work?” Jason turned to you, swirling the liquid around cautiously. “Yes! We’ve been error free for five years!” you said proudly, this was your life's work after all. “And we’re back! How ‘bout we get this show on the road! Grayson you first?” 

With a shrug Dick threw the little up back, and in a few seconds a cerulean blue glowed around him. The crowd oohed and ahhed as Dick smiled. “Any matches?” He looked to you. Glancing over at your guy who had snapped the exact color he shook his head. “Not yet! Dick Grayson-Wayne’s soulmate is still out there!” the crowd rumbled in excitement, everyone wanted a test now.

“Ms. Brown! Care to drink?” Stephanie drank eagerly, and quickly shone a deep royal purple and the crowd cheered. “No match!” you let everyone know and there was another cheer.

“Mr. Todd, you next?” Jason didn’t waste a moment, drinking the liquid he shone the brightest red you’d seen in a while. For a moment it reminded you of your red all those years ago. Looking over it was another no, and the crowd was almost losing it, many girls in the audience begged for a drink to see if they were his lover. 

“And lastly Ms. Y/N! Ready to see the creator try her own drug?!” You corrected him, taking a moment to shout out all the amazing scientists, interns, and volunteers you’d worked with over the years. The crowd cut you off, chanting “DRINK DRINK DRINK” urging you to throw the cup back, the liquid tasted way better than the last time you’d tried it in the trial run. You help out your hand to show the lack of coloration and the audience sighed. Smiling sweetly you began to talk about the drop date.

“Thank you all so much! I’m so excited to release this with my team in just a month. I’d like to once again thank my tea-” you heard a shriek “OH MY GOD THAT’S JASON’S COLOR!!!” and the audience lost it. Confused you saw Jason’s jaw drop, and you looked at your hands that now radiated the same deep red from all those years ago. 

“UM WE’LL BE RIGHT BACK!” the host shouted over the chaos. You immediately got up, rushing to the color scanner. “Holy shit Y/N it’s really Jason’s color.” he confirmed your suspicions and without thinking you sprinted back up to the sofa. Connecting your hand to Jason’s cheek the two of you began glowing the same color. Locking eyes with Jason, you couldn’t help but start crying. The aura radiated between the two of you and Jason pulled you into his chest. 

The camera came on after the 20 second impromptu break. And what they saw made the news that night. “JASON TODD FOUND SOULMATE LIVE ON LATE NIGHT” “CAMERAS TURN ON AND JASON IS HOLDING HIS GIRL - TOO CUTE! CLICK FOR PICS” “JASON TODD CUFFED! SEE THE PICS HERE!” In just the few seconds before they could cut the cameras, millions of viewers saw Jason holding you, the bright red shining around the two of you while you clung to him. And the pictures were everywhere. Pulling you off stage you couldn’t wrap your mind around what had just happened. 

“My- my soulmate died years ago. When I was a kid I took the drug and didn’t shine! This doesn’t make any sense!” you looked up a Jason and practically saw a lightbulb go off. “Well um, were you around 13 when your soulmate died? [ you nodded ] And you were about 14-15 when you tried the drug? [ again he was right ] Okay well long story I died and came back to life. And you must’ve tested when I was still gone” he finished and you almost passed out. “YOU DIED?” you screeched. And he clamped a hand over your mouth. 

“Shh princess that’s valuable knowledge for family and soulmates only” it was slowly starting to register that you were in fact his soulmate. “Soulmates” you whispered, leaning in to hug him again. “Soulmates.” he confirmed. 

“God I have never seen Jaybird this sappy in my life, you might be magical” Dick came up to you, shaking your hand and pulling you in for a hug. “You got a good soulmate Jay. By the way, can I have a couple servings early I’ve got a bet with Timbers that Damian’s soulmate is Jon and I need some soulmate help for myself?” you rolled your eyes and Jason tugged you back to his side. “Back off Grayson she doesn’t even know you!” 

“A little protective already Jay? Poor Y/N get used to this sweetheart” Dick winked at you and you felt Jason tighten his grip around your waist. Dick backed off and Stephanie bounded up to you. “Oh my god Tim’s gonna die he’d totally wanna be here! Plus I bet Bruce is gonna have to do all sorts of interviews now hahaha. How are you doing girl? This is a lot! Welcome to the Waynes!” she said, pulling you in for another tight hug, and the seriousness of finding your soulmate hit you. “Oh my god I’m gonna have to do so much press. How did I not think of this. What are the odds oh no this is gonna be a shitstorm fuck fuck fuck” Jason interrupted you by squeezing your hand. “Uh I really hate press too, I mean Bruce owes me patrol for like a week for just tonight but, if you like, need me for something I can go... does that help?” he looked lost, but it was clear that he wanted to help, and it was adorable. 

“I would like that. And it’s late. I’m exhausted. Maybe we can meet up tomorrow somewhere private? We’re gonna get stalked so maybe you can come over to my place?” you realized you just had to take it step by step, and finding a soulmate was the best first step ever. “Yeah, that seems easier.” Jason sighed, and the two of you exchanged numbers.

“By the way, what does patrol mean? And does the color red mean anything to you cuz it doesn’t to me and usually the color means something but it could not?” You saw Jason’s eyes widen.

“Erm, I’ll tell you tomorrow. It’s another one of those ‘family and soulmates only’ facts. If that’s okay?” you nodded, just happy to have a soulmate.

“Of course Jason, but just know I’m gonna give you a hard time for going and dying on me. Idiot” you stuck your tongue out as he winked.

“Only to make a perfect love story for you princess” and you groaned, but he wasn’t wrong. This one truly one for the books. 

[aelysianmuse]

DESTIEL FIC REC

Okay, so, fanfiction is something that has brought me so much joy, entertainment and comfort during these hard times. These are the Destiel fics that I have bookmarked and would suggest for everyone to read. They are top notch in every department and I’ve read each and every multiple times. I wrote them down from the lowest word count to the highest and I linked the authors to their tumblr accounts, whenever I could find them, so please go shower them with love!

Touchstone - by xylodemon -   Words: 3,519 - Summary: "You're in pain," Cas says finally. He sounds sad. (Episode tag for 11x03, the one where Dean is hurt but doesn’t think he deserves Cas healing him. Cas disagrees and makes heals him in loveliest, most tender way. Everything is beautiful.)

Colette - by englandwouldfall - Words: 4,218 - Summary: Cain’s prediction keeps ringing in his ears. He’s going to kill Crowley, then Cas, then Sam. It makes sense to him. He hates how much sense it makes, but there’s something almost poetic about it; it’s circular, neat, the Mark wants it. The Mark wants to destroy everything, but most of all it wants to destroy Dean. And that would do it. (Episode tag 10x14, Dean struggling with the Mark, unable to deal with all the anger and urge to kill and Cas trying to be his savior Collette. Feelings are acknowledged but things are far more complicated than that.)

Newton’s Third - by felolle - Words: 6,220 - Summary: “How can I be running from something when I’m racing toward it?” “I dunno -- kinda your thing.” Thanks for the call out, little brother (Episode tag 14x03, Cas helping Dean deal with Michael possession. Awesome character portrayal!)

Take me home tonight - by persephoneshadow -  Words: 8,111 -  Summary: The one where Cas wants to have sex and Dean is there to help (It’s a PWP where it takes some jealousy for Dean to get his head out of his ass - and Cas knows exactly what he’s doing)

Boys on film - by loversantiquities - Words: 8,540 - Summary: But maybe that’s what it is—maybe Castiel’s finally realized something Dean is too chicken to admit, despite the fact he’s been jerking off to the idea of Castiel fucking him for the past few weeks. The idea warms him as much as it pains him to think about, his friend not being able to talk to him about something like that. That has to be it—it’s the only explanation. Castiel likes him.“Or maybe he knows you do cam shows.”Dean chokes on his burger. (Basically Dean does cam-shows, Cas knows. They get it on in the end.)

Cuckoo and Nest - by komodobits - Words: 10, 190 - Summary: For a long time, Castiel thought that every earthly possession other than the immediately necessary was excess to requirement. But Dean – Dean who named his car, who keeps a photograph of his mother in his wallet, some thirty-plus years after her death, who still has the crumpled ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign with a sleeping pelican emblazoned on it from the Microtel outside of Roanoke where he first kissed Castiel, clumsy and unsure, under the unsteady fluorescence of an exhausted bathroom bulb – is sentimental.It puzzles Castiel, where Dean draws the line between what is meaningful and what it is worthless. (Boys walking on eggshells around each other, Castiel mistaking Dean’s neatness for annoyance about Cas’s lack of thereof, Dean mistaking Cas’s apprehension for having one foot out of the door. Miscommunication that gets resolved. It’s delightful!)

Just turn around and go - by Porcupinegirl - Words: 11,320 - Summary: Dean should be happy. His best friend and housemate of five years, Castiel, is moving out to live with his boyfriend, Balthazar. Dean's career is going great, so he can easily afford the house on his own now. This is just growing up, moving forward to the next phase of their lives.It would be awesome, if he weren't in love with Cas. (Some angst and miscommunication among roomies who are in love but needed a little push to finally do something about it, and that push is Cas deciding to move out and live with his actual boyfriend. Things work out just fine.)

So glad we made it - by annie d (scaramouche) - Words: 16,421 - Summary: At twelve years old, Dean makes a friend, who becomes his best friend, who will eventually become the love of his life. (Destiel fic in which they know each other since childhood and take their sweet-ass time with admitting to each other that they’re otp: meant to be. But it happens. Timeline of little snippets that show them falling in love and owning that shit up, at last!)

I know who I want to take me home- by annodominique -  Words: 17,548 - Summary: The one where Dean and Cas are new workmates who hate each other's guts, are somehow forced into driving each other crazy because they secretly want to fuck, and they might have fallen in love with each other in the process. (Lots of sexual tension, mutual pining and enemies to lovers storyline - all in a nursing home. It’s amazing and absolutely heartwarming.)

Welcome to humanity - by winnywriter -  Words: 19,944 - Summary: Castiel is falling, slowly but surely becoming fully human. Every day there is something new to discover, and many of those discoveries are not wholly pleasant ones. And the whole time, Dean can't help but worry about the fact that the further the angel falls, the more he finds he likes the human Cas is becoming. (It’s exactly what the summary says it is. Moments of Castiel slowly becoming human and Dean trying to help him navigate that path while navigating it himself in the most Dean way possible)

On air - by wincechesters - Words: 21,219 - Summary: Cas and Dean are radio DJs who host the second most popular morning show in Lawrence. They’ve been co-hosts for years at different stations across the country, and they own a house together out of necessity, even though they’re just friends. But for some reason, a lot of their listeners and even some of their friends and family seem to think that they’re secretly in some kind of relationship, which they’re totally not (besides that one time that totally doesn’t count). In spite of that, Dean thinks he’s got everything figured out, until an ill-fated on air game of Truth or Dare turns everything upside down (and the billboards around town aren’t helping either). (Friends to lovers story that’s very well summarized, so I have nothing to add except that it’s such a wonderful read, this author is absolutely amazing and you should definitely read it.)

The Beach House in the Winter - by englandwouldfall - Words: 23,715 - Summary: They're not exactly in a good place right now, so it was probably a bad idea to agree to a full Milton family reunion at their old summer haunt to mark a year since Cas' father died.Obviously, he did it anyway. (This is a second part of a series, I absolutely suggest reading all of the works ‘cause they’re equally wonderful, but I read this one first and individually and loved it the most so I’m suggesting it. Look at tag warnings. It’s about Dean having panic attacks mid sex due to trauma, Castiel trying to treat him right and handle the situation properly. They love each other so much ugh)

There are many things - by imogenbynight -  Words: 28,807 - Summary: In which Dean and Castiel learn, through trial and error, how to be together. (What starts out as an angsty fic that follows Cas’s human experience after Dean kicked him out of the bunker, turns into a Destiel falling in love fic as they find their way back to one another)

Sometimes it fits - by ballsdeepinwinchesters -  Words: 37,720 - Summary: Castiel is an over-worked, socially awkward neurosurgeon; Dean is the ruggedly handsome paramedic that asks him out for drinks. The rest kind of fell into place. (Two hotties with busy work schedules having lots of sex and being domestic. It’s a lot of fluff and smut. No angst.)

Put up your dukes - by saltyfeathers - Words: 38, 282 - Summary: Dean can't sleep. Cas offers to tire him out. (Dean struggling to accept the sexual tension relief Castiel is oh-so-eager to offer. So much tension, sparring goodness and bed sharing.)

All’s well that ends well - englandwouldfall - Words:  52,326 - Summary: Dean knew the second he took off that he shouldn't have left, but that didn't mean he could have guessed what he'd be coming back home to. (It’s actually a part 4 of the series, and I do suggest reading the entire series, but I read it first and individually before even realizing this and I absolutely loved it nonetheless. It’s about both Dean and Cas having made some poor choices in the past, abandonment and infidelity and two of them loving each other so much that they’re willing to forgive and fight for each other no matter what. Angsty and beautiful.)

A midterms night’s dream - by englandwouldfall -  Words: 75,756 - Summary: There's at least fifteen good reasons why they're not sleeping together, it's just that Dean can’t remember them when Cas sends him one second dirty snapchats to goad him into doing the dishes. (One of my absolutely favorite fics and one of my top 3 fic authors (does a lot of series, which gets you really emotionally invested!). I suggest you read literally every single Destiel story written by this author, ‘cause it’s consistent in character portrayal and in invoking emotional response and I’ll probably explicitly write down at least one more story that I particularly liked from them. This one’s about them being college roomates who’re basically oblivious to sharing sentiment of wanting to be in relationship with the other, so they pine emotionally while having exceptional we-are-strictly-fuck-buddies sex)

Version 2.0 - by elizabeth1985 - Words: 75,937 - Summary: Life is nothing but a series of processes. We rise, we work, we function within the walls we’ve designed for ourselves. Dean Winchester does not deviate from this system. Heavily tattooed and a certified genius; Dean necessitates control. Relationships are a no-go. Too messy, unpredictable. And yeah, he knows having casual sex with his best friend, roommate, and business partner is a dumbass move. But Cas’ suggestion is impossible to resist.What Dean doesn’t expect and couldn’t possibly predict is the unique way Cas manages to shut down his mile-a-minute mind, giving him a level of inner peace he’d thought to be unattainable.What starts out of convenience morphs into a dynamic emotional slide neither of them were prepared for, forcing them to decide what they’re willing to risk. (Cas and Dean being business partners turning to fuck buddies turning to mutually pining idiots, where Cas won’t let things progress further ‘cause Dean is so entwined in every single aspect of his life that he’s absolutely terrified to lose it all. But Dean makes an effort to show him otherwise!) + It’s hard to fool around in a tent (Words: 5,861)

Any little heartbreak - by followthattardis - Words: 76,897 - Summary: Dean Winchester knows everything there is to know about the human heart. Well. Anatomically speaking. (Very Grey’s Anatomy-y, Dean is a thriving cardiosurgeon, Cas is his new surgical nurse assistant, there are so many well written characters, so much gossip, gratuitous sex and eventually a relationship. It’s so lovely, ugh I love this writer.)

A crash course in computer safety - by followthattardis - Words:  85,269 - Summary: On the day of his 29th birthday, Dean receives an email from his old nemesis: Michael Milton, the guy who got him kicked out of college and stole his girlfriend. The email contains encoded images with top secret CIA/NSA intelligence – and now their only copy is in Dean’s brain. Both agencies send their best operatives – Castiel Novak and Victor Henriksen respectively – to handle their accidental asset and protect the invaluable data in his head. To justify their sudden appearance in Dean’s life, they adopt covers: Victor as Dean’s new co-worker and neighbor, Cas as his new boyfriend. Needless to say, Dean’s brother and his girlfriend are thrilled to see him in a relationship they believe to be real. Clearly, there’s no way this could go wrong. (This is a NBC: Chuck AU and one of my top 3 fics ever. I haven’t watched Chuck at all and regardless of whether you have or not, I don’t wanna write anything else in this section ‘cause I enjoyed discovering every bit of information on my own. I’ve literally taken this fic and studied/analyzed it as a writer myself to take pointers on accurate character portrayal and writing style. It’s book material, I’d literally buy anything this author writes. It’s becoming a series and more content is to come so I suggest subscribing.) + Curtain up (Words: 10,311)

La hantise (The only work in progress fic here) - by quiettewandering - Words:  87,468 - Summary: Castiel’s mother dies, leaving him the family home that sits abandoned on the moody coast of Maine. He’s forced to return to the past ghosts of his trauma, as well as meeting the mysterious and nomadic Dean Winchester. Dean offers to help Castiel fix up the house so he can sell it, which quickly becomes problematic as Castiel begins to develop feelings for Dean; especially when details of Dean’s troubling past come to light.This is a story about the sea, second chances, and two broken, forgotten people building a love between them while restoring a broken, forgotten house. (Romance, ghosts, house renovation, cliffhangers, angst - I am awful with WP’s, never read them till they’re done ‘cause I’m an impatient one but this is the one I couldn’t resist and thoroughly enjoy)

Ignore the butterflies: best friend advice from Dean Winchester - by impatient14 - Words:  114,837 - Summary: Dean likes his doctor, but his doctor doesn’t like him.Accidental friendship ensues, heartwarming bonding type moments occur, and oops!friends become best!friends.But best friends aren’t supposed to feel the way Dean feels about Castiel. He knows this. So he ignores all the things that he can’t help feeling. When he sits and watches a movie with his best friend or when they are arguing about which method of coffee brewing is best, he pointedly doesn’t look at his friends lips, or the adorable way he tilts his head when he doesn’t understand.Dean ignores his feelings.That’s the way he knows how to keep his best friend.Just ignore the butterflies. (Dean is a heroic firefighter who ends up in stand-offish Castiel’s ER and flirts mercilessly with him, but to no avail. Cas is not made of stone, though, he’s just trying to protect his little heart ‘cause Dean does scary heroic things. It’s super emotional, go read it.)

Keeping you in sight - by gingerswag - Words:  136,374 - Summary: Castiel valued his solitude, and was happy to stay hidden away in the mountains for the rest of his life. But when his seeing eye dog dies, that solitude is suddenly broken when Gabriel shows up not with another dog but an actual human slave. Castiel doesn't believe in slavery, but he can't turn away the very hurt and broken man he's given. (This is a slavery fic, look up the tag warnings! It’s extremely angsty, it has a very human and rational ending which not might satisfy those looking for a conclusive, expressed fairytale ending for these two. It’s about Dean having gone through a lot of trauma and Cas being extremely lonely and two of them trying to mend each other while going through an excruciatingly painful healing process. I don’t think I can summarize it in a way that envelops everything that happens in this fic - it’s a tougher read but absolutely wonderfully written and very angsty)

Stay with me, sweetheart - by mandalarose - Words: 142,926 - Summary: A single moment's distraction ends with a serious car accident that leaves Castiel trapped in his vehicle. Fortunately for him, fire fighter Dean Winchester is there, never leaving Castiel's side as the rest of his company work to free him from the mangled remains of his SUV.When the two meet again in the ICU, Castiel finds himself just as drawn to and comforted by the handsome fireman as he was during his accident. Dean is certainly attractive, but single father Castiel doesn't have time or space in his life for a romantic relationship.Then again, there's no harm in making a new friend, is there? (Dean is so whipped, so is Cas but he tries really hard not to get invested ‘cause everyone leaves and it’s not a commodity he can afford now that he’s got a baby. Thankfully for him, Dean is all-in kind of guy who’s gonna make all the right choices, one after another, fighting to show Cas that he can have what he desires and deserves, even after multiple attempts of Cas’s to push him away. Love conquers all!)

Four Letter Word for Intercourse - by bendingsignpost - Words:  194,739 - Summary: As a grease monkey turned college freshman, Dean's constantly three seconds away from being stressed out of his mind. It hardly helps that he's finally figuring out his sexuality in his thirties.What might help with that stress is a little phone number (and a big credit card bill). If he can't figure out how to be bisexual in person, he can at least give it a go over the phone, right? (I think I probably read this story a hundred times. Fantastically written fic where Dean is a student discovering his sexuality through a phone sex line, struggling with having to take over family business and Cas is a professor with a sidejob, with whom Dean interacts wordlessly at the library. It tackles on mental health, on wonderful sex dynamics, coming out and lots of other stuff. It’s one of the best writen fics out there, along with the other works in this series that I highly suggest to read: A Little Anal - Words: 18,805 and What makes a man kneel - Words: 9,920)

[boyjadzia]

I really need to sleep but I can’t because the discourse is haunting me.

People really need to actually listen to transmasculine people and trans men when we talk about our experiences with masculinity and femininity. There is literally no other way to understand it; you’re not going to get it by assuming it’s the same as cis men’s (or women’s), but you’re also not going to get it by assuming that it’s just the exact reverse of transfeminine people and trans women’s experiences. It isn’t. It really, really isn’t, and it’s so frustrating and hurtful for me to see over and over again that whenever we try to bring this subject up, our posts get derailed by people (generally not trans women) claiming that our descriptions of our experiences— descriptions that make no attempt at generalization, no attempt at prescriptivism— are transmisogynistic and violent towards women at large, because we dare assert that maybe our experiences of masculinity don’t always align with the same privilege that cis men experience for being men.

If you’re not a transmasculine person/trans man, especially if you’re also not a transfeminine person/trans woman, and you feel hostile towards trans men who say they don’t feel like they had male privilege before transitioning— an experience that you have literally no authority to discredit— you really need to do some self-reflection and think about why your immediate instinct is to write a trans man’s claim to being oppressed by cis men, in a way that is specifically a result of those cis men’s cis male privilege, off as yet another symptom of male privilege and abuse. Because time and time again I see people try to explain this— that they did experience misogyny, however misdirected, before transitioning from those same cis men people want to group them with, and that they absolutely do not intend this to be a general statement about the nature of how one’s gender is perceived or privileged pre-transition– and get shouted down by claims that actually, saying that must necessarily imply the opposite for trans women, and therefore is transmisogynistic and sexist garbage.

Please, I am urging everyone, you have to understand that gender and the ways in which it interacts with gendered power structures is far far far more complex than a simple “you’re one or the other” privilege/oppression dynamic. There is literally no law out in the real world that says that if trans men are capable of not having male privilege before transitioning, it means trans women must always have it. Trans men and trans women are not opposites. We have vastly different experiences that do not benefit from being compared to one another. The power dynamic that exists between trans men and trans women does not influence the one that exists between trans men and cis men, or the one between transness and cisness.

There is nothing radical or revolutionary about hating trans men, especially for speaking to our own experiences with gender non-conformity and oppression by cis people. There is nothing radical or productive about telling trans men that they’re bad people for being male (because as a matter of fact, that’s exactly what cis people say). Please let us talk about this oppression without automatically conflating it with the privilege trans men have for not being subject to transmisogyny. I’m so tired. I’m so sick of being told I’m a bad person for being transmasculine by cis people, only to have the rest of the LGBT community turn around and agree that I’m a bad person for being transmasculine, and in particular that because I want to talk about the complexities of my experience I’m actively hurting others. Like I’m not even a binary man, I don’t really consider my experience to be “manhood” but I’m still so exhausted by this. You all are always putting words in our mouths, as though saying “my gender non-conformity is not privileged” or “my life pre-transition was heavily influenced by the misdirected misogyny I experienced” is somehow the same thing as saying “I was socialized female.” No one is saying that, no one is claiming that trans men have the same experiences as cis women. This is precisely why you need to actually hear what we’re saying, because you’re just deliberately not getting it, you’re deliberately choosing to interpret what we say about our own lives as an attack on others’. And that’s not helping anyone.

[thechocoboos]

Could you do the chocobros (+Ardyn and Ravus) taking care of their significant other while she's on her period?

These hcs have been sitting in my google docs for a week now--but hey, they’re ready!!! I ended up with eight pages of headcanons so brace yourself lol; wrote these while i was suffering from the very thing i was writing about. what a life.

HC: The Bros + Ardyn and Ravus taking care of their SO on their period!

Noctis

Noct knew that periods existed, he swore that he did, but he just kinda… forgets.

So when he came home to see you dying on your couch, he was just… ??? “Uh, babe? You okay?”

“NO, Noct, I’m not o-fucking-kay--”

“Uh.”

It was only when he called Ignis that he figured out what was going on, with Ignis exasperatedly having to remind Noct that hey, people get periods!

It was a short phonecall, luckily

And it didn’t take Noct too long to get with the program

Softness increases to 110%

Mutual laziness increases to 70%

Caring for his SO increases to 2000%

He does his best--but he also kinda. Just. I dont wanna say it but he doesn’t think it’s that big of a deal until he sees you crying over cramps, then he realizes that periods suck and that you just need your stupid boyfriend to give you the love and support that you deserve

After that, he gets better!!!

“NoCT, can you please go get me my meds? And some water--”

“Can’t you do it yourself--” He always freezes, remembering how bad it can be, “Shit, sorry, babe--” He already started getting up, bringing out a bit of your favorite snack as an apology, “You know I’m an idiot.” He said when he handed you your meds and your fave candy bar

You know, and for whatever reason, you still loved him

He kinda has to learn what to do and what not to do just because he feels too unsure to ask anyone

Unfortunately, it was also through trial and error that he realized how sensitive you can sometimes be when your period is knockin’ at the front door

He found out through multiple crying sessions--and yes, it was usually his fault, but he was always insanely good about making it up to you with food, cuddles, and movie marathons

He’s the boyfriend who goes to the store for tampons and pads for you, sees the giant aisle of them, and while he isn’t embarrassed to be seen buying shit for his SO, he has absolutely no idea what to get and literally grabs the first shit he sees

And of course, you send him right back with a picture of the brand you actually like and a pad in his hand just so he can get it right the second time

Cue the mental image of Noctis comparing the pad in his hand to the color of pad packaging in stores

“They’re both green so it’s gotta be right… right???”

In summary: Noctis is a dumbass and can be a bit insensitive about periods simply because he’s really not around women or anyone who gets periods, but he really does try to remedy his ignorance and any mistakes he makes

Prompto

Prompto, too, has never really had much experience with girls or periods or people with periods and he just. He tries so hard--he really does

He gets you a new teddy bear every single time (at some point, you know you’re gonna have to tell him that he can’t keep buying you new bears, but it’s so cute that you don’t want him to stop)

He’s the one who gets sympathy pain

I promise, the second he catches wind that you’re on your period, he’s out the door trying to find your favorite of everything

If you send him to the store for pads, he comes back with one of everything and lots of tears in his eyes, “Babe--I didn’t know what you wanted so I just bought everything im sorry oh gods”

He’s the pitiful soul who blushes as he buys all the pads and tampons and looks like he’s gonna cry

He’s the one who pulls a cart full of sanitary products to the first register he sees and is crying as he looks in the clerk’s eyes and cries, “My SO is on their period i dont know what they like help me please”

Christ, he’s a mess but he’s your mess and you love him

He comes back with every single snack he knows you so much as look at

Cravings? He’s got your back.

Like, you mention this shit you want half heartedly and then he disappears for three hours and comes back with a weighted blanket, heating pad, and three bags of those weird chips you were craving

He’s always blushing and frantic, but he blushes the hardest when you ask him to lay with you and cuddle

Ofc he does it--he loves it, but the bold, straightforward way you ask has him blushing head to toes

He once caught himself wishing people got periods more often just so he could hold you like this more often--he accidentally said it out loud, and you only snuggled into his chest more and told him to shut up and hold you tighter

Prompto is a mess but he tries so, so hard just to make you comfortable and content

He once drove for twenty minutes to find your favorite candy bar (and he would do it again, no question)

When you cry bc emotions, he starts to tear up, too

He always says, “Babe, if you cry, I’ll start crying and then we’ll both be crying and I don't think either of us can handle that on an emotional level” and then you both cry anyways

He likes to sing to you when you guys cuddle, his voice is soft but husky in the perfect way that lulls you to sleep

If you fall asleep in his arms, he falls asleep, too

He’s the extra bf who goes above and beyond unnecessarily, merely because he doesn’t know how else to help you

Gladdy

Holy Behemoth Batman! One of these idiots is properly aware of periods!!!

And it’s this one. Bravo, Gladdy, bravo. Fans everywhere are cheering your name.

In all seriousness, he is aware and actually knows how to handle someone who is on their period

Iris used to get some pretty bad periods, and with their mom not around and their dad always busy, it was Gladio who had to help her out and actually explain them to her in the first place (he’s never gonna forget when Iris ran up to him one morning while crying and shouting about bloody underwear)

So, needless to say, he ain’t shy during that time of the month. In fact, he knows more tips and tricks than you do, simply because he was one hell of a big bro for Iris

Heating pads? Blankets? Snacks? Damn good brands of sanitary products? He’s got it all and you didn’t even have to ask, like holy shit

Back when you guys were just starting out your relationship, you had actually gotten your period once while at his place and when you told him you’d have to go home because you forgot your products, he was like, “Oh--hang on. You prefer pads or tampons???” and pulls out a giant basket with a lobster on it, labelled ‘Menstruation Crustacean’

He said that he liked to be prepared in case Iris was over

What an absolute legend of a bf. Like, after that, you knew you weren’t letting this fucker go.

He rubs your stomach if you’re having really bad cramps and doesn’t even have to be asked to go grab you some pain meds--it’s like he has a sixth sense or some shit

Really, really chill about periods as a whole like he’s not scared to go to the store for you and he gets the right products!!!

Sometimes, when you get so sore and crampy that you can’t move, he’ll carry you around in his arms and doesn’t complain once

Will change your bloody sheets and isn’t the slightest bit grossed out--doesn’t mind emptying the bathroom trashcan either

Similar to Prompto, he loves to hold you and hum to you. He won’t sing, but even his absent minded humming while he holds you to his chest under one arm and reads some random book lulls you to sleep with ease

Quite frankly, probably the best of the bros when it comes to periods

He’s not scared of them. He doesn’t care if it gets messy, he knows what to do, like. Shit. Fuckin’ winner over here.

Ignis

Ignis, much like everyone else, does not have that much experience with periods. Didn’t really have many folks with periods around and he’s never had a SO before

So you would think he’s a hot mess--but nO! He would nEvER

He googled and he googled and he googled and he asked coworkers (always respectfully ofc) and he googled some more

He has an arsenal of tips and tricks and guides and everything--but he does lack the hands on experience

He will help you and he will buy you everything you need and more--but there will always be the hesitation of someone who doesn’t really know what they’re doing

One time, Ignis tried to rub your belly to help with cramps, but he only succeeded in tickling you and embarrassingly had to admit he doesn’t really know where his hand should be

Ugh what a cutie pie

He’s patient and sweet and he does all these small things for you without even telling you, and when you do notice, you feel like your heart is just gonna burst and vomit affection everywhere

He’s still a little embarrassed and shy when you boldly demand cuddles, but he does it nonetheless (he fucking loves it though he will never admit to it)

He’s the SO who cleans up bloody sheets and quietly gets blood stains out of your clothes while you’re vomiting from cramps, but never, ever makes a big deal out of it and does it with the caring affection of a kind man in love

Bumps his pun game to 110% to try and make you laugh

Knows which subjects and what phrases and words to avoid to prevent your emotions from blowing up

Even if they do, he never takes rude words to heart and he always comforts you lovingly, giving you a warm hug and a kiss on the cheek

He keeps an eye on you

If you shift uncomfortably, he’s there with a heating pad

If you’re meds are wearing off, he already has more in hand

Sometimes, if you want to cuddle, you only have to look at him a certain way before he’s sighing and climbing into bed next to you, reminding you that if you were anyone else he wouldn’t go this far

He just dotes on you in the quietest ways possible

Ravus

Insensitive Dumbass Part 2

Yes, he knows people get periods. Does he care? No.

Not until he falls in love with you, at least.

Cramps? Can’t be that bad. Migraines? Just mere headaches. Aches and pains? Probably nothing. He dismisses each symptom right up until you come into his life

Because when you guys get together--he gets to see firsthand just how bad everything can get

Oh gods you’re crying from it all?? VOmitting??? HOW WAS HE SUPPOSED TO KNOW--

He felt like a right dick (and he should)

But he was also quick to change his tune, because the love of his life can’t suffer like this

Not while he’s around!!!

He’s quick to ask Luna what to do, and thank god at least one sibling in their family is sympathetic and not a mess and a fucking half otherwise he’d be doing things through trial and error (not that he didn’t, even with the help)

He does everything by the written list Luna had given him (she knew he wasn’t gonna remember everything), even years after you two got together (he likes to use it as a benchmark of sorts to know when he’s doing everything you need)

The first few times you had sent him to the store because you ran out of supplies, he had absolutely no idea what to get and any poor employees who tried to help him earned the most aggressive, hostile glare he could muster

He ends up calling Luna, too, because how is he supposed to call you and tell you that he doesn’t know what to get??? And have you think he’s incapable??? NO! He was gonna be the best bf and get exactly what you fucking needed or so help him--

He’s just very aggressively in love. Little bit of a dick but he changes and grows as a person into the kinda man we can all love and support and who will love and support us right back!!!

He does his best but he doesn’t want to seem incapable of being helpful

Likes to remind you when your medicine is supposed to wear out so he can show that he’s some use

Anytime he gives you a massage or rubs your back or smth, he’s always giving you nervous, uncertain glances just to make sure you’re content or that he’s helping

Always giving you nervous glances just to check that you’re okay (he really loves you, he’s just not sure how to show it)

Lots of hugs and kisses but he’s embarrassed about all the skinship when you want cuddles (don’t get him wrong, he really, really loves it; he’s just… not sure what to do with all these feelings)

He learns how to be a supportive, wonderful SO when you’re on your period and maybe one day he might actually remember your favorite brand (but don’t get your hopes up too much at that)

Ardyn

Back in Ardyn’s day, periods weren’t exactly talked about, so the first few times you mentioned them, he was absolutely flabbergasted that you would blatantly talk about something that was considered so private

If he hadn’t been a healer, he wouldn’t have known near as much about them as he did

But even as a healer, periods were still something considered a woman’s subject and were usually left for women healers and mothers to handle so he could rarely do much

But then--Ardyn had to get pretty fuckin’ used to periods because you were pretty much out of commission when your “aunt irma” came to visit

First couple times you got your period while with Ardyn, they weren’t so bad, but then they went right back to their normal symptoms

When Ardyn came home to see you curled up in a ball, clutching your abdomen and trying to just keep your eyes shut to block out the light, he had thought you were terribly, terribly sick

“Darling--what’s wrong? What happened--” He was genuinely concerned and worried, his brow furrowed and mouth drawn in a worried frown. He hadn’t realized that your periods were so debilitating, so to see you like this, he had thought something even worse had happened

You only managed a groan when you tried to talk, and that only made him rush over even more, trying to lift your arms to see where you were injured, “Darling, please--”

“‘M fine,” you tried to say, “It’s just--fuck,” You hissed as a particularly bad cramp came your way, “--fine, jus’, that time of the month.” You wheezed, laying your head back down on your pillow

And that was when Ardyn realized just how terrible the symptoms could be

He was a worried man. Absurdly worried actually, and sometimes it made you want to laugh if everything didn’t hurt so badly

Ardyn was the kind of man to do absolutely anything and everything for his love, so that’s what he did

You never had to leave the bed for anything unless you really wanted to

Ardyn would deliver your pain meds on the clock, always accompanied by the most ridiculously jeweled goblet he could find (he was always one to be amusingly over the top and treat you like a queen, but his dramatics always cheered you up)

He was usually by your side unless you requested some alone time, and then he would respectfully kiss your forehead, say “Of course, darling. If you need anything, don’t hesitate to call--I am always at your disposal,” and close the door quietly as he left

Otherwise, he would be laying in bed with you, one arm wrapped around your shoulder and the other holding some old book or resting across his stomach as he took a nap beside you

He would give you massages wherever you ached and he would provide herbal remedies from back in his day that were pretty good at relieving aches and pains

Ardyn’s innuendos and teasings would go on the back burner during this time--unless you instigated it

If you didn’t, he might tease you here and there, but always the tiniest, most light hearted things and it was always said in the softest teasing tones

All your feelings are valid to him, hormonal or otherwise, and he will listen to every word you say as though they were your last

Yes, you were usually treated like royalty by him, but it somehow increased exponentially when that time of the month arrived

[devilsnwitches]

SSDD - Ch3 - Into the Fire

AO3 <Link - Written by Me & @lynxtigerwritings

Tags = AU Canon-Divergent / Canon-Typical Behavior

Pairings = Vergil-OFC / Dante-OFC / Nero-Kyrie / V-OFC / Nero-V

Note - READ LOVE’S SACRIFICE BEFORE THIS CHAP IF YOU HAVEN’T - Pairing V/OFC

“Are you shittin’ me? Three to four months and you guys haven’t been attacked yet? What the actual fuck?” Was the first thing Yvette said once she and Charlotte got the full story.

Charlotte had to agree with Yvette. Demons should have been swarming them the moment the deal had been made. They should’ve been prime targets for any and all sorts of attacks. That demon either had the patience of a saint, or there was something more at play. She looked over at the blue-black bird that was resting on V’s shoulder. Golden-beady eyes were steadily watching her, assessing.

The light bulb came on quick in her head. There was indeed a reason why demons weren’t attacking this kid, and it had nothing to do with the deal. “You’re Mundus’ familiar.” She turned to Yvette. “The fallen King of the Underworld. The throne is still up for grabs.”

“Well ain’t that a plot twist,” Yvette whistled, “Damn, V, you go man.”

V glanced towards his room where he’d done the ritual all those months ago. Yvette’s praise felt...good, in a way, but he bowed his head to her. "‘He who holds to himself a joy, doth the winged life destroy’." Taking every precaution had been what gotten him this far. At least that was what he liked to believe. “Xina told me you had...advice for me.”

Charlotte let out a long, slow breath. Her eyes wandered. His tattoos, the circles under his eyes, and how he held himself. It was clear that this took energy. She didn’t know what price he paid, but she didn’t doubt it was a heavy one. She glanced over at Alexina, who was quiet. They were both soft-spoken, good-hearted kids. She inhaled sharply and let it out again. “Kid...no.” She shook her head, “V.” She looked at him. His eyes were fierce. They told a story without her having to ask for a word. “I’m gonna be blunt and honest with you because I respect you. You’re one of the few people that I’ve sat with, had a conversation with, and know for a damn fact that my sister and I might not get out of here alive if we went up against you. That’s saying something coming from a seasoned witch of thirty years or so. Whatever demon you made a deal with...they fucked up. They weren’t expecting you, but they also won. Whatever price you told them you’d pay...and believe me I can take a gander...they got more than what they bargained for. What that means, is that your life is no longer going to be easy. I’m not talking about the pain and the familiars. I’m not even talking about demons coming after you. There are people who’d want exactly what you can do. That’s not to say you can’t live a normal life. You’d have to fight for that. What I am saying is that...your new normal isn’t going to be fun and games.”

The silence was heavy and she knew V was hanging on to her every word. He was an observer. He looked and listened, a lot more than most people. Griffon didn’t seem to be too thrilled with the thickness of the conversation, ruffling his feathers and trilling. He didn’t like her very much and she didn’t blame him. Lysander reputation went far into the Underworld. Just like Dante’s. Soon to be this kid. “My advice to you, V, is to learn what you got. You can harness demon energy, summon things from the Underworld, and make it your bitch. That’s not easy. Not everyone has that kind of willpower, that kind of spirit. You’re both a hazard and the most dangerous person I know. I know the Sparda brothers. They’re as dangerous as you and they’re older.”

V looked down at his hand, examining the tattoos that only barely went over his knuckles, “‘I am a series of small victories and large defeats, and I am as amazed as any other that I have gotten from there to here’.” Glancing up again he knew for sure that Alexina and himself wouldn’t continue to be so lucky to be left alone. He had read about Sparda, same as any other who was smart enough to learn history. Of course he had thrown himself headfirst into that world. “Is there anyone that can teach me? Reading will only get me so far. If I have this power, I might as well put it into practice.”

“Now we’re talking!” Griffon cackled.

Charlotte looked at Yvette, a slight head-tilt and a raised brow. There were plenty of people. They could do it, at the very least get him on the basics, a foundation. Dante and Vergil could do it as well. Demon hunters and half-demons as they were, they had been around the block. She wasn’t sure if she should lump Vergil there, honestly. Nero and Kyrie were another factor. They were part of the Order a long time ago.

Her lips pursed. They had options, but the question isn't quantity. It was quality. There was no one that’d teach him summoning, he would have to learn through trial and error. “If that’s what you want to do, then we’ll help you find someone that can,” Charlotte said after a moment. “Dante has a network of people, I’m sure there’s bound to be someone he can recommend to you to help. If not, I’ll take you.” She looked at V squarely. “If, of course, I’m up to your standards.” She glanced at Griffon. “I already know how you feel about me, chickie.”

“Oh, you son of a-” He was about to fly towards Charlotte but was stopped by V’s hand and he settled himself back down, shaking out his feathers in a miffed sort of fashion. Alexina’s lips were curved slightly, looking away from them as she hid her amusement.

“Then that is what I will take,” V nodded to Charlotte, “I appreciate you offering to take me under your wing.”

“If you’re interested in spellwork and seeing if you can turn your poems into spells, I’m totally down for helping you out there. Char does the hexes and the symbols and stuff, I’m the Latin person.” Yvette beamed proudly.

Now that did sound like an idea. It amused him that the one who seemed the brashest was the one who could speak the elegant language of Latin. “I will take that into consideration, thank you.”

Charlotte leaned back looking a little on the exhausted side all of the sudden. She could already tell that she was going to be in hell for the next few months since her sister offered Latin courses to a kid that probably could summon a demon with literally his wits alone. “You both will be the death of me. I saw my life flash before my eyes.”

Griffon cackled. “I’ll let Shortstack have that gold star, girlie.”

X

The following day, Charlotte decided that the best way to test out V was to throw him into the fire. She wasn’t literally going to toss him into a middle of a demon fight and see how he fared, that wasn’t the greatest idea. However, she was going to drag him to see how he fit in with the rest of the group and see if Nico was willing to fit him up with a weapon. A conduit or something. She doubted he could swing anything heavy. She leaned back in the driver’s seat, eyeing him from the corner. He was reading his book, but she could tell that not a single thing was not noticed.

She could already tell, this kid was the kid that teachers loathed in school. Not for his smarts, oh they’d praise that, but he’d get bored quick. He’d pick up a book and read, and not once miss a beat. “You know, your stubbornness is a treat.” She said after a moment.

“Oh?” V picked his head up and watched her curiously, “Stubborn natures are not usually praised. What sparked you to say something like that about me?”

“There’s stubborn as in stubborn idiots and then there’s stubborn as in smart. I’ve dealt with more stubborn idiots than smart ones. Believe me, you’re a breath of fresh air, V.” Charlotte smiled as she tilted her head towards him as she flipped her turn signal to turn a corner. “You watch. You listen. I bet there have been a few times where if you wanted to, you could’ve started a shit show or ended one.” She hummed under her breath. “Mind if I ask you something personal, V?”

“You may ask anything you like, but there is no guarantee I will answer,” V responded cryptically, turning his page and settling further into the seat of the car.

Charlotte grinned, seemingly pleased. “Fine, I’ll give you two questions.” Even though there was no guarantee he’d answer either of them, it still made her pleased that one of the questions he might choose over the other. “What’s your full name? I only know you as V and while that’s not a bad nickname, it’s a...very short one.”

“Indeed it is.” His lips quirked at that, not elaborating in the slightest. He gave his full name to few people. The applications for the few times he held a job and Alexina.

Charlotte’s smile widened and she let out a soft chuckle. She flipped on another turn signal. “Okay. That’s fair.” Laughter echoed in her words as her eyes crinkled with the emotion. “Your girlfriend’s hot. Nico even said it.”

V’s hand twitched on his book, and he felt his neck warm, but otherwise gave nothing away, “I half expected that to come from Yvette’s mouth, not your own. Xina is not my girlfriend, even if Griffon calls her Hathaway.”

“Familiars are jerks as in they give things away before you even get a chance to hide.” Charlotte glanced at her rearview mirror. “Vet’s a terrible influence sometimes, and admittedly talking girl last night got me all sorts of curious. Nico’s also no help in that either. Thought I’d ask first before one of them pounced on you...loudly. Believe me, you’d rather be trapped where you are than getting a massage from Yvette if she’s around.”

“I will keep that in mind.” V closed his book and set it on his lap, eyes on the area around them once he realized the surroundings were unfamiliar. “Tell me again, where we are going?”

“We’re getting you fitted,” Charlotte replied, tapping her fingers against the steering wheel. “We’re tracking down Nico and her van. I don’t want her hauling through the streets like they’re made of clay. I’m thinking they’re back at Dante’s place. If Vergil’s the stubborn idiot type I think he is, he’s there as well and if he is...I get to get upset about the wound he’s undoubtedly making angry.” She glanced at V. “Pop quiz time, V. What does the name Abaddon mean to you?”

Racking his brain, V knew he’d heard that before. It didn’t take long for him to narrow it down, “Abaddon, one of the Christian Angels of Death. Also known to be a demon. Rules over a bottomless pit, an Abyss. A destroyer. Destruction.”

He did his research. Charlotte tapped her fingers on the steering wheel again. Which meant he decided which demon to summon when he did his little ritual. “Okay. Now tell me a bit about Stolas.”

“Often depicted as an owl with a crown, or a raven,” V didn’t take as long to answer that as an image came to mind, “Known for astronomy, poison plants, and their herbs as well as precious stones. Not much is really known about him besides that.”

Charlotte nodded a few times, “He’s a plant demon with a thirst of trouble and worse his plants don’t usually have antidotes. Not ones that you can find anywhere, anyway.” She nodded her head towards the back of her car. “I’ve studied plants, that’s my shtick besides drawing sigils and paper origami spells. If you meet up with a demon that can do plants, don’t. I don’t even know how Vergil’s still alive. Stubbornness and pride I guess. I can’t blame him, I’d do the same thing. I ain’t dying to a plant. I think that’s everyone’s thought. Still. Things are getting worse from here, and if you’re gonna get in the middle of these battles, I’d rather you know. I have some of the cures. If you’re handy with plants, I can teach you how to make some of them, just in case.”

“By ‘antidotes you can’t find anywhere’ do you mean ‘common antidotes’?” V arched a brow at her. It wasn’t often he found himself around someone who would ramble away about something. Xina only did that when she was passionate about her chosen topic. “Xina ribs me for it, but I tend to keep my room as dark as possible. Blackout curtains and the like. So I don’t usually keep plants alive.”

“I’ll give you some extras then. Bottles I mean.” Charlotte grimaced. “Words and I aren’t..uh...good with each other.” She smiled thinly. “I’m the one that graduated high school, too, let that sink. We’re here.”

Eyeballing the building V slowly got out of the car and took a good hard long look at it. Committing it to memory would be a good idea, as he felt he would be coming around here quite often in the future to come. Right in front of them was an arched roof over the porch, double doors that were certainly worn in. In fact, the whole building looked worn down as if they were in the slums of Redgrave city, but V knew they were only in one of the several residential areas. Attached to the roof was a clear neon sign with cursive letters loudly screaming "Devil May Cry" and a man at the end with a gun pointed towards the capital D, a full-body sword on his back. “Should I be concerned?” V couldn’t help asking.

“The only thing you gotta worry about, Shakespeare, is keeping your head on straight.” Griffon appeared on V’s shoulder, peering at the building. “Nothing in there’s gonna bite ya, and there’s no shame in running away. You can always run away if you have to.”

“Never thought I’d hear the day a demon told someone to run away and mean it kindly.” Charlotte mused as she came out from the rear seats, carrying a stick of metal. “Come on. Dante’s kind enough and Griffon’s right. No one’s in there looking at you for a fight. If anything, they’re gonna be curious about you as you are them.” She gently patted V’s back.

As soon as they walked through the doors, V heard the wooden floorboards creak beneath his sandaled feet, and when he looked up from being startled by it he was greeted by an interesting sight. Two red couches to his left underneath the stairway were filled with people, the desk straight ahead of him had a man with shocking silver-white hair sitting in it, and they were all watching a familiar short woman with a trash bag in hand muttering to herself as she busied around like a bumblebee.

Before he or Charlotte could say anything, a voice at the top of the stairs caused him to look up. “Why is Yvette cleaning your place by herself, Dante?” He looked like the man behind the desk with his hair too wet to form a shape, only he wore shades of blue instead of shades of red.

V was the one to answer him, “It seems to me she’s the type of person to not allow anyone in her way.”

Charlotte was impressed. Five seconds in the door and he already called out her sister. Then again, it was probably cheating since they already met yesterday. The other boy on the couch looked over at them, his silver hair much shorter and wearing a royal blue hoodie spoke up. “Who’s the MCR knock off?”

Nico, on the other hand, was already leaping to her feet and heading towards Charlotte. “Is that what I think you got in yer hands there, Lotty?”

Charlotte’s instant response was to hold it up over her head, despite that, both girls were the same height if Charlotte wasn’t a tiny bit taller. “Uh-huh. I got rules for this one, Nico. Nothing flashy, something practical, and can be used in a fight.”

“Seriously? Yer gonna make me go borin’ with that piece of equipment?” Nico folded her arms over her chest. “Do you know how awesome I can make that thing? It’d be a work of art.”

“It’s not for me. It’s a gift.” Charlotte bargained. “Triple your usual rate. Unless...this isn’t a challenge at all for you Nico.”

“Give me that.” Nico jumped up and snatched it out of Charlotte’s hands. “Wow. I can’t believe I’m actually holding this...who's it for?”

Charlotte merely tilted her head and Nico looked right over at V. Her eyes looked all over him for a moment and then noted, “You must be Lexi’s boy.”

Griffon cackled. “Looks like they all got you pegged, pretty boy.”

Dante even glanced up at the bird’s voice. He didn’t have to look over at the stairs to know that Vergil probably shifted uncomfortably. The familiar looked….well...familiar. He looked back at Charlotte. “I didn’t shove her into doing this. She-”

“I VOLUNTEERED AS TRIBUTE!” Yvette screamed towards Charlotte, “You should’ve seen this place, Char! Horrible! You would’ve cried!”

Charlotte did a whistle as she held three fingers solemnly towards her sister and turned to Dante. “Next time instead of sacrificing my sister to the Hunger Games, rent yourself a wife.”

“I volunteer for that, too.” Yvette chirped and Vergil scoffed up above.

Dante shrugged, a smirk playing at his lips. “I didn’t do anything. She’s the one that went Tohru Honda on me. I barely said a word, let alone told her to do anything. I offered to help, but V called it.”

“Oh my fucking god, nerds. The lot of you.” Charlotte deadpanned, her attention turned towards Vergil. “How did my handiwork come out?”

“After a certain point,” Vergil put the towel he’d been using to dry his hair around his neck, “My demon healing took over. My back isn’t completely healed over, but it will be by tomorrow.” He wasn’t about to say that avoiding itching it had been a nightmare.

Nero noticed that V was gluing himself to the corner of the room, watching them. Griffon was steady on his shoulder, beady golden eyes also surveying the room as they took in the different interactions. He had a book under his arm, but Nero wouldn’t be at all surprised to look back at him and see his nose stuck in it. Nico’s question also went avoided. Either she was wrong and he didn’t know who Lexi was, or this kid didn’t know why Nico knew.

Charlotte did tell them that they had met him and that she wanted to see everyone’s reactions to him. Nero didn’t feel anything towards him, but that demon on his shoulder certainly gave him pause. He didn’t miss the look Dante made as he glanced over it. Carefully Nero stood up. He didn’t know why, but V reminded him of one of the shy orphans he sometimes ran into when Kyrie was working.

They were the ones that saw more than people wanted to admit. More ghosts in their closets and skeletons. The way V was watching him approach was much like how someone would watch a predator walk up to them. Assessing every move and every word before speaking. Like there was a game behind it. Nero didn’t do well with those kinds of games. All they told him was that the kid got hurt.

It sucked that this goth kid also looked like he was in a world of hurt. He noticed the necklace instantly. Same one the girl wore. The tattoos that were swirling in complicated and ornate designs were a little faded. Mostly around his arm that Griffon was perched on.

“Seeing something you like?” Griffon taunted Nero.

Nero instantly was reminded how he greeted his father and he tilted his head at the bird. “A talking bird.” He pretended to be impressed. “That’s a hell of a party trick you got there. I’m Nero. Who are you?”

“If you would like to see a party trick, I can certainly provide. You may call me V.” His olive green eyes crinkled a bit at the corners as a smirk tried to worm its way onto his face.

“V, huh?” Nero clicked his tongue. Playing the mystery route. He supposed he couldn’t blame the kid. Well, he was probably older than him. “This isn’t your only one?” He rapped his fingers towards Griffon.

“Ooh, someone wants to play.” Griffon trilled. “Don’t think you can handle us, little bug.”

Nero raised an eyebrow, “Was that the best you could come up with, Chicken?”

Charlotte made a soft noise in the background.

“First Charlotte wove her web and now you wish to irritate Griffon,” V was amused, and he forced himself to tear away from staring at Nero’s lovely blue eyes to address Dante, “I assume demons are a common sight around here?”

“I don’t think Lotty’s gonna win you any spelling bees. Also, you’re talkin’ to a quarter.” Nero pointed at Nico. “The only thing that’s demonic about her is her weapons.”

“Ain’t that the gospel truth,” Nico called from over her shoulder as she was heading back to her van. “I got a commission, so you boys have fun. Tell Lexi I said hi, V. She’s something fierce.”

“Shut up, Nico!” Nero rolled his eyes. “Honestly. It’s like she doesn’t get it.”

Dante watched the exchange with a furrowed brow and he leaned back. “The only thing that’s not so common to see is you, V, but Nero’s on track. I’m a half-demon. So is tall and brooding up there on the stairs. Everyone else around you is human. Well. As human as they get.”

“I was referring to more...unusual sights,” he glanced at Griffon but continued his smirk at Nero and patted his shoulder as he went by, “Outside.” He didn’t say anything else, going back for the door. He had been itching for a safe place to release his third, and if Nero wished for a party trick, then this was the perfect opportunity.

Silence. Nero was the first to shrug it off and head outside. Charlotte also decided to go, mostly out of curiosity and to see what this “party trick” was going to consist of. She was pretty sure her sister and Dante weren’t far off. Nico wouldn’t give a damn unless she saw it from her van. Vergil was also up in the air, but she could presume he followed if to confirm whatever suspicions he had.

Plenty of space was a wonderful start. V also wasn’t too concerned that it was daylight, as it meant people were more than likely at work and wouldn’t stare out their windows at the ruckus. It wouldn’t be for long, either, he had nothing for it to attack, but he could not deny he was eager. In all reality, this would be the first time he saw Nightmare the same as everyone else. Griffon had only told him of it.

Turning around, V decided to start off the show with shrugging Griffon off his shoulder and then flourished his arm out towards the group, his tattoos breaking off in particles and swirling before Shadow roared and pounced on the ground, shaking herself off from being cooped up.

“That’s two,” Charlotte muttered under her breath.

Nero had a feeling there was more to this. Like there was tension that started to crackle in the air. Anticipation made his blood roar in his ears like he was getting ready for a fight, even though there wasn’t one to be had. “Come on.” He grinned ferally. “That cat’s not everything you got.” He called out towards V. “Don’t hold back on us. This party’s just getting started.”

Something in Nero’s grin made V feel lively, and the smirk turned into a genuine smile. As he raised his arm slowly above his head he spoke, “‘He who kisses the joy as it flies, lives in eternity's sunrise’.” A snap. An explosion of black particles. The cool rush through V’s body that replaced the near-constant prickling made V close his eyes in blissful relief.

Nero wasn’t sure what he was expecting, but there were two surprises. One: V’s hair was suddenly stark white. It almost made Nero take a step back in surprise. A quarter demon like himself? Yet, he made a deal with a demon so...that wasn’t possible. The second thing was how large this familiar was. Stocky, like it was made of nothing but stone, but it’s body pulsed and swirled with dark energy and matter. As though it was created from it. A large purple eye was glowing in the middle of where the head should’ve gone. It was deep inside of the shoulder and it barely made any noise. Nero could…get this feeling this creature was confused. Who did it attack?

“Goddamn.” Nero whistled. “You certainly weren’t kidding when you said that you can do tricks.”

Charlotte pursed her lips together. Three. Everything came in three. “This kid.” She muttered fondly. “Is going to be the death of someone, I swear.”

V was absolutely in awe of the massive creature in front of him when he turned to look at it. He felt it’s confusion and he subconsciously hushed it, reaching out and laying his hand on what looked like a rocky arm. Coarse. Warm. He was fascinated and glanced up, examining the purple eye. Having Nightmare out was such a rush but he smiled ruefully, knowing it couldn’t last. Patting it, he allowed it to return since it had nothing to do. “That…” he released a long breath and turned back towards Nero, “Was Nightmare.” He motioned to the panther with glowing red designs on her fur, “Shadow.”

“It looked like one.” Nero quipped as Shadow paced herself in front of V before weaving around his legs. Nero could tell that the familiars were attached. Extremely attached. He didn’t doubt that if any of them made a move against V, they’d be in a world of hurt. Especially after Nightmare’s little show and tell. “You look like you’re halfway between passing out and in pain.”

“My, you are quite astute,” V placed his hand over his chest, taking a deep breath as the prickling pain was settling down. It wasn’t nearly so bad with Shadow out, and really he was grateful Alexina enjoyed his panther familiar so she could be out more often. “I am more...dizzy from relief. It has been nearly four months and Nightmare has never been out.”

Nero frowned. There was a question on the tip of his tongue, but he had a feeling asking it would only lead him in circles. “Let’s go back inside, and you can stop hogging the corner. Just in case someone else wants to pretend that it’s the corner of invisibility. You only make me feel bad.”

“You joke like your Uncle,” Vergil sighed, making his presence known.

“It means he has a good sense of humor. Don’t knock it because you don’t,” Dante teased.

V watched as Yvette, who was holding the door open, giggled madly at the exchange. Shaking his head, he stroked the top of Shadow’s head and followed everyone back inside. Though he did pause and look at Charlotte, “What are your thoughts now?”

“My thoughts are that you are a fucking terrifying person,” Charlotte said bluntly. “And how you haven’t been a target lately changed. Someone’s bound to feel that, and take it as a challenge.”

“Well now. That’s good. Business was getting slow, thought the demons finally got bored.” Dante swung his arms back and forth. “Prepare for the worst like the Abaddon fellow. And that Stolas. You and I got a score to settle with him later.”

Charlotte wasn’t sure if rolling her eyes would mean anything, but she did so anyway.

“That is another reason why Charlotte brought me here.” V explained once they were all inside and heading for the couches, “My familiars can protect Xina and I, but I have no training.”

It hit close to home. Nero felt like the world suddenly was showing him a mirror. He thought of Kyrie back at the orphanage that she was working at. They were far enough that any demon could take her at any moment. She took self-defense because Credo and Nero couldn’t stand the thought of her getting hurt, but anyone could be taken off guard. It only took one. One second. One moment.

Nero already knew that if his Uncle or his father didn’t, he would. “Fuck.” Nero hissed after a moment, throwing himself down to the couch, crossing his legs in midair. “I’m doing it.”

“Whoa-oh. Hotshot thinks he can teach us new tricks, huh?” Griffon leered. “What makes you our number one pick of the week?”

V held his hand to Griffon, watching Nero intently.

There were millions of reasons that Nero obviously shouldn’t take him on. Life experience, not a witch, had no idea how to do anything with familiars, weapon variety, fighting styles, there were plenty of reasons not to. Instead, Nero looked at V square in the eye. At the same time, there were reasons to help.

Nero eyed Griffon and instead of addressing V, addressed the bird. “Number one pick of the year.” He pointed out before turning his attention to V. “Because of anyone in this fucking place knows anything about what you’re going through. It’s me and my father, and my father’s injured and while he can recover in a day, I’m sitting right here. I don’t got a lot under my belt, that’s true, but I got enough to get you back to Lex safe. I got enough to help you protect her because I know that if one drop of blood leaves her, you’re guilt-ridden for a month.”

An inhale and V gingerly touched the tooth necklace. He had made a guess, but that confirmed it. “‘The people who consider you weak have not yet noticed the wolf hiding behind your eyes, nor the flames inside your soul’.” The poem fell from him without any trouble at all, “I accept your offer, Nero. We should perhaps talk next about places to train. Keeping my energy flares as far away from her as possible would be ideal. You understand.”

“Yeah.” Nero did understand. He turned towards Dante who was watching them with a complicated expression. He didn’t bother to question it. “You good with us using your back yard ol’ man?”

Dante rolled his eyes, “Sure thing, whippersnapper.”

Yvette cracked up in the background.

Nero paled, he forgot that Dante wasn’t one to lay down and take it, “No wait-”

“You kids can be on my lawn if you need to,” he continued, as though Nero didn’t say a word.

“Oh my god-” Nero wanted to fucking die.

“I’ll toss a newspaper at you every once a while,” Dante’s grin was feral as Nero looked completely done with this conversation, “Vergil do you remember back in the good ol’ day-”

“OH MY FUCKING GOD PLEASE!” Nero threw a pillow at Dante and wasn’t at all surprised that it was caught. “I get the MESSAGE!”

Vergil pinched the bridge of his nose as he listened to Yvette wheezing, her cleaning tirade completely halted as she stopped to laugh to death, “At least someone enjoys your jokes.”

Charlotte pursed her lips together, “I vaguely find myself in between horror and amusement because I suddenly can feel my age.”

“You are not-” Nero rounded onto Charlotte. “Following his line.”

“Oh please, I have enough confidence in myself to not embarrass you to death.” Nero looked relieved for five seconds. “I’ll do that to you on the battlefield.”

Yvette pointed at Charlotte from her position leaning on the wall, “She will roast people on the field!”

Griffon trilled, “Not unless I shock them first, shortstack.”

V shook his head, “Not that sort of roasting. I understand the reference.” He chuckled when Yvette chirped a ‘yay’.

“Nerds.” Charlotte deadpanned. “Violent nerds. All of you. I thought you people were supposed to be sweet. Goddamn.”

“You went to the wrong school,” Nero retorted.

“I must have. Fuck me.”

“Well, we got that all straightened out and taken care of.” Dante looked pleased. “If you need any help Nero, we got you covered.” He turned towards Charlotte. “You keeping an eye out?”

“So far nothing.” Charlotte shrugged. “Either they’re cowards, or this is gonna bring them out of hiding.”

“Then we’ll see you sometime later.” Dante turned to V. “You know that’s a good question. How are you going to sneak out on your girl anyway? It’s rude to leave her hanging.”

“There is no sneaking involved. Xina was the one who suggested I take their advice in the first place. Their advice was training. So here I am.” V leaned back, getting more comfortable.

“She has a good head on her shoulders.” Nero looked at V. “I’m glad to know you two aren’t the types to not tell each other shit. I can already tell you how bad that can go down.”

“Yeah yeah, dramatic effect, near death love confessions. Not that won’t happen an-” Griffon was cut off.

Yvette was quite surprised when V was not the one to silence his familiar, but it was Vergil standing abruptly that caught everyone’s attention.

“Secrets between lovers leads to death.” The hiss was cutting and the words dripped acid, but if they were aimed at anyone it was himself. Vergil turned on his heel and his strides were long and swift towards the door, snatching his coat from the hooks, “I am going out.” Was his only explanation before the door clicked shut behind him.

The silence was uncomfortable, but no one had the heart to refute it. Not even Griffon for all the wise-cracks that he made. Charlotte stared at the door, her expression complicated. Only for a moment before she finally decided to also leave. Either to follow him or to get away from the silence was beyond them.

Shadow, on the other hand, seemed to have an idea. She leaped on the couch and draped herself over Nero’s legs, stretching herself as long as she possibly could before melting against his lap.

“I didn’t realize I was destined to be a demon pillow,” Nero said dryly but gingerly ran his hand through her fur. It was...shocking at how soft the fur was and the energy that crackled underneath her. It wasn’t painful, not at all, but it most definitely reminded him that she was more than a panther. “Good girl.” He muttered under his breath as she purred louder. “I think I’m stuck.” He admitted.

Dante huffed a laugh before walking out of the room. “Need me to haul those out for you, Yeti?” He asked, pointing at the trash bags she had collected.

“Don’t call me that,” Yvette muttered even as a smile played at her lips and she tied off the one in her hands, all of the trash picked up by now, “Sure, you can show me where the bins are.”

V listened as the two made their way to do their own thing, and he crossed his ankles in front of him as he arched a brow at Nero with Shadow. They were left alone now. “She likes you.” He decided to start off.

“Never thought of myself as a cat person. Dog person sure, but cats? Never really had a chance to go up against one.” Nero said as he rubbed Shadow’s ears and she headbutted his hand to get him to rub more. “She’s a lovebug, isn’t she? All that affection. It’s like you and Lex don’t spoil her, and I know better than that.”

“I’ve heard plenty of people say they don’t like cats because they are evil or something of the sort,” V waved his hand dismissively, “I prefer cats over dogs myself. Our apartment doesn’t allow pets, but since this is...awfully convenient,” he traced over his own tattoos, a mischievous little smile on his face this time, “Xina has been extremely pleased she gets to have Shadow who’s the size of a dog but a giant ball of love.”

“What am I, chopped liver?” Griffon pouted. “You make it sound like Hathaway holds no love for me V. Rude. I get the feather scratches.”

At that, V actually laughed and he reached his hand up, scratching under Griffon’s chin, “Indeed you do.”

Nero’s lips curved into a smirk. “Lex has a soft spot for animals and she adores you because you can talk.”

“That is not my only shtick hotshot.” Griffon stuck his neck out further for V to scratch. “I am an extremely good wingman too. They’re stubborn.”

Chuckling again, V continued to scratch Griffon absently and looked to Nero’s demonic arm. He hadn’t a chance to really take it in, “If you use your claws I’m sure Shadow will adore you.”

“You mean my nails or…” Nero trailed off as he looked at his demon arm. It had been a while since he had a stranger look at it. Kyrie hadn’t minded, which had been a fucking surprise to him. For V to point it out, he wasn’t sure how to feel about it. He switched hands but was careful for it, just in case Shadow didn’t like it. As he gently used his nails to scratch Shadow, he was pleasantly surprised when he saw a tiny hint of tongue stick out. Well now. There was a pause. “Pretty terrifying looking isn’t it.”

“Your arm? I don’t think so at all.” V shook his head, resting his hands in his lap and watching Nero with interest, “Though I will say I am confused why you have that and neither Dante nor Vergil do. Is it because you are a quarter?”

“I think so.” Nero shrugged. “My theory is that both Dante and pops can do a Devil Trigger and go full demon. Since I’m a quarter, I don’t think I have that ability and this is kinda...you know...the only reminder I got that says ‘yeah you got demon blood in you’.” He shifted his weight carefully underneath Shadow. The familiar was pretty freaking heavy, but he wasn’t about to push the cat aside yet. “It happened when I got injured a long time ago. It’s...it’s a hard story. That’s why I get it when you said you wanted to protect Lex. I couldn’t protect Kyrie. Almost lost her. It took a long time to get over it, we still wake each other up sometimes with nightmares about it, but...the orphanage keeps us busy...and demon hunting most definitely keeps me busy. Yet the reminders are still there. She used to sing for the Order. One of the best singers. You’d get along with her famously I think.”

“I would enjoy meeting her.” V nodded. He said her name with honey-sweet affection and it warmed his heart. “Xina isn’t my girlfriend, but maybe someday. That’s a secret you get to know. My name is also Vitale.” He ignored Griffon’s squawk and how Shadow twitched her ear. “I don’t tell many people that.”

“Yeah, Lex was pretty secretive about your identity as well. Pulled out all the stops to make sure she didn’t even say V.” Nero watched him for a moment. “She said to me that she was sick when you made the deal.” He paused in scratching Shadow’s fur. “Was she really near death or was that you jumping to conclusions?”

V licked his lips and took a deep breath, “I prayed to the Gods first, for a miracle. I knew if I made a deal with the devil it had to be because there was no other way. So that is what I did. The night I made the decision...she wouldn’t have made it to see her favorite thing. The sunrise.”

Nero let out a slow long breath. Griffon was even oddly quiet about it. Solemn. “You’re an interesting guy, V.”

[ryouverua]

Trial 4 - The Confession  (3)

THIS IS.... NOT HOW I THOUGHT THINGS WOULD GO DOWN... AT ALL...

Investigation 1 / 2

Trial: 1 / 2

WHAT THEY HAVE A TEXT BOX AND EVERYTHING THIS IS LEGIT THEN?!?!

Wait, so she really did meet up with him before the virtual world then? I imagine it was before she gathered everyone, but after that flashback light that caused her to panic the way she did - so in the last few days? And it would have to be before he met Monokuma too... so not yesterday (as I’m imagining this taking place midmorning after they went to the VR world) but the day before that?

I can only imagine what threw him off as she was speaking. He has an excellent poker face though, so I’m not surprised she didn’t realize he was onto her.

It says a lot about Kokichi that he could stay calm in the fact of that, but also it’s... a bit sad that he didn’t think he could approach anyone for help...

... Then again, countering a murder plan with a murder plan is, uh, very Supreme Leader-ish! And one that doesn’t get your own hands dirty...

I guess you are really confessing everything, because I don’t know why you would feel the need to add that damning evidence on top of all the other stuff???

By making it more interesting, did he just mean getting everyone into the simulator full well knowing Miu’s plans, or literally telling Monokuma, ‘I am going to counter Miu’s murder plan with my own’?!?!

It sounds like Kokichi’s idea wasn’t to put the motive in the simulator, after all! Monokuma is straight-up saying it was his!

But does it matter at this point if we didn’t find it??? I swear, between the Necronomicon, the First Blood Perk and this, we seriously not using any of the motives!

So they argue a bit with Monokuma about him working together with a student but he handwaves it away with the whole, well, ~I wasn’t involved with the actual murder myself~ which, okay, fine though technically isn’t he working with the mastermind. It’s kinda distracting from the confession at hand anyway.

  It’s a bit scary how badly you want to confess though.

“Anything that lets me actually put you in the ground.”

That’s a lukewarm revenge -

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK

W H A T

j us t

happen....ed...........

shuichi also reacted with probably one of the cutest ‘eh’ sounds I have every heard out of his mouth but unfortunately this is all visual based, not sound based, so I cannot include it here, and also that is entirely beside the point

Holy shit, Kokichi. Holy - shit - DID YOU... STRAIGHT UP... JUST..... DROP GONTA’S NAME...

AN ENTIRELY APPROPRIATE REACTION TO FINDING OUT YOU MURDERED SOMEONE VIA ALTER EGO AND DON’T REMEMBER IT once again, a masterstroke by Kokichi, Mr. ‘I reference YGO Duel Monsters without even trying’

Yeah, I’m not surprised to see Tsumugi chiming in here. She has been Gonta’s biggest defender from trial to trial, even if her voice isn’t as loud as Kaito’s. 8(

And my god, if Kaito’s voice ain’t loud right now!

HIMIKO DON’T YOU FUCKING SAY IT

A;SLDKFJ KOKICHI DON’T THINK YOU INTERRUPTING HERE SAVES YOU FROM ME SERIOUSLY JUDGING YOUR LIFE CHOICES

“YOU CAN’T JUST SPLIT THE SCREEN LIKE THAT WITHOUT A SWORD DUEL THAT’S NOT HOW THE MECHANIC WORKS!”

“- ANYWAY I was totally confessing guys, and on behalf of Gonta as well as myself! I can’t believe you would just interrupt me when I’m being so charitable! Waaaah, you’re all so meeeean ~ !” insert crocodile tears sprite here

I am here to interrupt this incredibly serious and terrifying confession with accompanying illustration to ask - why ‘Busters’?! What kind of dumb name is that, honestly.

Between this and your ‘if everyone dies, the game will end!’ comment, you’re really scaring me right now, Kokichi - !

Gonta is not about this at all.

Man, I’ve been making the D: face over and over again during this trial - meanwhile, Gonta right now is the living embodiment of that text emoji right now.

Oh.... oh, of course. Kokichi doesn’t know about the avatar error either, does he? He’s been operating under the assumption that Gonta has been... lying to us this whole time............ That he’s been a perfect liar, without a single crack in his veneer, even to a keen liar-spotting master like Kokichi, and that he’s been just as good at tricking us as him - even better, possibly. 

Oh, no. Oh, no.

Gonta’s strongest, most stalwart supporter of the whole game is back in the game!

TRAUMATIC BUZZING NOISE FLASHBACKS

Between all the back and forth, including a bit of gloating at Shuichi on Kokichi’s part, he drops this:

And here, to counter all of the ‘Gonta is too ~dumb~ to do something like this’ comments, he already has a ready-made argument. He really has been set from the beginning, huh? Either that or his improv ability is topnot - oh wait this is Kokichi Ouma we’re talking about, of course it is. Anyway, while I think Kokichi set Gonta up to do this, I feel like I’m at least affording Gonta a bit more agency than his classmates. 8′/

d-don’t.... neglect the heart...... nngh

erika furudo is being channelled by kokichi ouma to wreak havoc on this killing game, this truly is the worst timeline

FUCK PLEASE DON’T BRING UP GENTLEMEN THIS IS SO AWFUL I’M GOING TO D I E

and everyone else seems to be in the same state I am, minus the whole ‘I’m 99% sure it was Gonta’ mindset I had going in, so Kokichi asks them the obvious question:

Aaaah, I thought so. Kaito has been pushed far enough that he won’t accept anything other than Kokichi being the culprit. :(

Kokichi’s about to drop a massive truth bomb in the trial and Kaito is not going to like it.

OH FOR FUCK’S SAKE KOKICHI NOW YOUR TROLL FACES ARE WARPING THE FABRIC OF REALITY ITSELF AROUND YOU PLEASE CONTROL YOUR TERRIFYING ULTIMATE POWER

I just really wanted to isolate this one shot from the debate especially because damn, just - the way they set it up for him and his sprite to dominate the whole screen by just - towering over everyone despite everyone being against him, despite everyone accusing him, is just some great work by the layout team!

Also the fact that they can contrast that with this image with all the flowers and sunshine around him, with that cute little smile on his face... man, I keep praising what they did with the trial debates for a reason!

And once again, it’s Kaito argument that Shuichi is forced to cut down...

All the pieces except for two - Gonta’s motive/reason he would work with Kokichi (because I thought it was maybe spur of the moment move on his part to protect Kokichi, but Kokichi is heavily implying it isn’t, and the fact that it was done via prepared item is.... a problem) and Gonta’s memory problems - are officially out in the open. Oooh geez - I had been wondering how they would do this case since to me, it didn’t seem technically difficult to figure out, but I guess the writers’ solution to that issue is to just gut-punch the players all the way to the end. 8′D

And now Kaito’s being countered by his other sidekick. Can we stop kicking this poor puppy while he’s down??? As in, the poor puppy who is probably dying a slow death from a mysterious illness right now??? Is this the game’s idea of karmic rebalancing for not outright deathflagging him again this chapter, or???

Because you’ve been baiting him this entire time.

So... was he going to let them fall for the lie of ‘Kokichi Ouma is the culprit who killed Miu’? That’s what I’m wondering right now. He’s very happily driving in the point that the one, singular truth can be incredibly painful, but this still seems very much to be a reaction to all the events of the trial leading up to this point!

Having Gonta beside Kaede’s stand, the other person who we thought, ‘No, it couldn’t be, it couldn’t possibly be....’ was probably planned from the very beginning for this trial, I imagine.

I-I MEAN IS THAT FAIR SINCE BUGS ARE DIRECTLY TIED TO HIS TALENT...

But of course, while the classmates are rallying around Gonta and Kaito...

Showing growth at the most unfortunate times, Shuichi Saihara uses his budding confidence to grow up up up and away from Kaito. 8′\

Look at him, inserting himself in between the two like this -

“SHUT UP KOKICHI YOU’RE RUINING OUR BROSHIP - W-WE CAN STILL BE BROS AFTER THIS, RIGHT KAITO???

Kaito directly after the trial but actually no please let the saimota stay strong you must overcome....

On the one hand I feel like Kokichi is being heavy-handed - on the other, I’m starting to think that he feels the need to over-explain everything to his classmates because they just won’t get it otherwise. 8′D

I don’t feel like this is 100% fair though - he did a really great job with finding the door in Chapter 1! He, uh, did completely lose his mojo though, so...

Well, the point is, Kaito did need to teach him how to trust in other people because Kaede broke it by lying to him! Shuichi has been a naturally suspicious worrywart this whole time!

HIS VOICE IS BREAKING I CAN’T FUCKING DO THIS

SHUICHI CAN’T EITHER

FUCK I THOUGHT DOING HIS FTES WOULD HELP ME THROUGH THIS BUT IT MADE EVERYTHING SO MUCH WORSE

Oh shit, this was a surprise bit of support that I wasn’t expecting! How shocked do you think Kokichi is right now that K1-b0 of all people is not completely disbelieving him, on a scale of 1-10??

If I make a comment about how computer-like this is would I get slammed for being robophobic or -

I mean Kaito’s technically not wrong? But he’s not completely right either... I, I really think Kokichi is trying to kill two birds with one stone here. 8′/ But to what end, is the real question... Disillusionment? Is that the ultimate goal?

MONOKUMA YOU’RE BRO-BLOCKING ME!!!

unholy screeching -

Kaito sounds so betrayed -

“Hold on Monokuma, I thought this was only supposed to happen in the event of an even split -”

“Shut the fuck up Shuichi Is2g I’ll crazy glue your hat back on!”

THIS IS AN INCREDIBLY UNLIKELY TEAM and also a popular OT3, I imagine with an incredibly complicated name. like. how do you combine saiouma and, uh... kiibouma I’m guessing - saikiibouma maybe???

also K1-b0 please don’t wave your Objection! finger in Gonta’s face like that, it is neither the time nor place and also incredibly rude and not helping -

I absolutely love (and by love I mean my heart is being wrenched In Twain) the way they have Shuichi facing in one direction, and Kaito fully, completely turned the other way.

Once again Shuichi is learning how to defend himself, and is finally willing to do it. I... just wish it would be under better circumstances...

Actually, out of pure luck, it lines up really well with Kaito’s last FTE and the option I chose where Shuichi bites back about his detective work. It’s funny how in the end, his natural reaction is still to search for the truth at all costs, and I like reading him as someone who is naturally curious as well as singularly focused that way, sometimes to the detriment of everything else - and come hell, high water or, regrettably, casualties. And he’ll certainly have those regrets, and fret on them endlessly as he loses himself in a spiralling circle of self-doubt, but would he be able to stop himself from following that path down to the bitter end? No... no, I don’t think so.

Should I include every cap of Gonta pleading with everyone that he isn’t the culprit? No, it’s redundant. Will I anyway because he’s tearing my heart to pieces? Yes. Yes I will.

asldkf;asdf the worst thing is he isn’t. He isn’t lying. He paradoxically is the killer and not lying about it, because not being the killer is his current truth AS HE KNOWS IT...

Y-You sound like you’re talking from personal experience, and outside of the last few trials, too! Which side of this ‘cornering’ were you on exactly...????

Oh!!! We haven’t seen this sprite in a long time!

Is it just me or is Kokichi acting extremely viciously right now? Like, his vitriol levels are off the charts. Honestly I couldn’t bring myself to interrupt this part with commentary because the way Kokichi is going off, just absolutely screaming at him, is a huge departure from the cool and collected Ouma we’ve had up to this point!

Did they... prepare arguments beforehand, maybe? And he’s losing it because Gonta isn’t playing along with the plan he said up? With that said, when Gonta turned on Kokichi in the Meet-n-Greet, Kokichi wasn’t anything like this. So what’s his deal???

Kokichi Ouma will not rest until he has flipped every single aspect of this trial and the trial format as it’s been up to this point on its head, and subsequently, used it to attack everyone around him. 

Holy shit, Kokichi has well and truly lost it. This - this has to be real. It’s far too raw for it not to be real.

Ugh, the way Kaito’s voice cracks when he jumps in here...

KAITO......................

I... feel like, despite flickerings of his ‘playful’ persona, this may be the longest he’s ever gone showing his genuine feelings - and man, they aren’t pretty. I mean, that’s assuming this anger is genuine... but I really, really feel like it is.

Just like another character I love who also uses lies and fantasy as weapons, I feel like going over this section again with new eyes will be extremely telling.

Still, that means he really, really wants to live. And the ‘we’ there is interesting. Who is the ‘we’? Is he speaking for a select few, including Shuichi? For the whole class? Someone not here, in a similar vein to Kirumi?

you know Kokichi for someone who wants to live, maybe screaming at someone whose good friend is an assassin is a bad idea

You know everyone fighting over him is eating Gonta from the inside out.

Ah, fuck, I’ve been waiting for the other shoe to drop and I think this is when it’s going to happen.

I’m like 99% sure Kokichi’s on Tsumugi’s hit list for next chapter. 8′D 

Oooh, speaking of growth - !

You know, I keep saying this and I don’t know if I’m alone in thinking this or not but Shuichi has been consistently weak in all things social and emotional, detection-wise and otherwise. But now, here, we finally have Shuichi picking up on the true source of Gonta’s confusion on his own, his language, and how it could be relevant to the case on his own without anyone else giving him any clues or hints!

The one who has consistently stood up for Gonta in every trial, Kaito, the one who wants to believe in everyone, and Gonta himself... aaaaah, no, no no..... 8′/

KAITO WHAT IS THAT NEW SPRITE

OH GOD NO THAT’S SUCH A SAD SPRITE SDLKFJ

OMFG HIMIKO ARE YOU SERIOUSLY WHY ALL OF THIS HAPPENED

ALSO... oh, that’s right. Gonta lifted up the manhole cover at the beginning of the game with his lefthand, didn’t he? SHIT....

His sprites and tones of voice are oscillating so wildly now and it’s really hard for me to keep up??? I’m getting whiplash asdlfkj

THAT. THAT IS THE ONE PART THAT I AM WAITING FOR. I thought it was in defense of Kokichi because that is the only way I can feasibly see him killing someone and still be, well, the Gonta Gokuhara who wants to protect everyone, but there is too much of this murder that seems premeditated!!!

So we’ve established this in previous games via Celes’ and Peko’s trials, but it’s worth going over again - especially since these guys have no knowledge of either of those games -

Yeah... we’re really going to need a motive from Kokichi. Could it be as simple as countering Miu’s plan? I suppose taking her out as an obvious threat makes sense, and he’s already established that he wants to live ... There’s also the question of if it can really be something like, ‘he also wanted to use this as a way to create a fun mystery.’ I really hope not. 8′\ I suppose something like, ‘I’m taking opportunity of the fact that I’m getting rid of a threat on my life to also drive home certain points to the rest of my classmates, and also as revenge for the events of the last few days’ would be more of an acceptable answer to me, given what I’ve seen of him so far. With that said, that... is not a great way to survive, considering the target being painted in broader strokes on your back each passing minute...

DON’T LOOK AT ME, SWEETCHEEKS!!

don’t neGLECT THE HEART, DAMN IT

Jeez, maybe he really does see the rest of them as chess pieces... and Shuichi as a knight that can move in abstract, highly unpredictable ways. 8/ Either that or he’s thinking he can keep tightlipped on the motive since Gonta no longer knows it?

Looks directly at Shuichi - winks - blows kiss - “Hey you know what would be a great first date idea? Setting up a tragic murder via patsy that will rock your worldview, potentially break you apart from one of your only friends in this wretched place and ultimately send everyone spiralling into despair.”

“W-Where did you learn how to pick up people?”

“Oh, some book I found in the library called ‘Enoshima’s Guide to Love for the Hopelessly Loveless’, why?”

“KAEDE.AGAIN, WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME IN THIS SPOT. I DIDN’T WANT TO BE THE PROTAGONIST. SOMEONE, PLEASE SEND HELP.”

Sadly, Kaito is all bluster at this point... oTL

I have a feeling this is going to end up looking a lot like my reasoning...

He goes down the list so clinically. It’s one thing for me, an outsider, to be able to do that (and just barely, because I was SAD about the conclusion I came to, damn it), but for someone in the game to be able to do it... yikes....

“There is no amount of incest roleplay fantasy dreams that’ll make up for the shitshow that is today.”

“He’s making me be the one to say it, isn’t he. Sonuvabitch.”

well fuck you too

no no no no no no no he’s CRYING HE’S AUDIBLY CRYING THIS IS 50 SHADES OF NOT OKAY

He’s straight-up challenging Shuichi to be the one to pull the trigger (absolutely pun intended).

IF.... IF ONLY IT WERE SO EASY, KAITO....

“If I just choose myself THIS HELL WILL BE OVER.”

“Bro I will fucking deck you.”

What if I just

turned

the game off

right now

just let this game board sit open, here, for all of eternity

that would be okay right

[beccadanae]

ok so the first time i tried to write Wells’ birth story it all got deleted soooo here’s take two (as if i just have time for this???) (whatever, this is important to me): 

Thursday October 25th at 630pm I started feeling contractions. They were about 8 minutes apart and were pretty manageable. As manageable as they were I handled them better when I was in the tub. I tried to go to sleep but the pain of the contractions kept me from sleeping... like I was laying there just waiting for the next one to hit rather than sleeping until it happened, in addition to trying not to wake Evan. I wanted to do most of the laboring at home so I endured through the night because I had an appointment Friday at 930. When we got there my doctor checked my cervix and told me I was 4-5cm, which meant I could go to the hospital to be admitted at anytime. The contractions were still bearable so Evan and I decided to go home for a little longer. We were at home doing business as usual (I watched Mulan) until I couldn’t take it anymore and I called our doula, Lori. It took me a lot to call her because when you experience a contraction, the pain is HORRIBLE but only lasts about 30 seconds, then it goes away and you have a clear head again. When I had a clear head I would forget how bad the pain was and be like, “nahh I don’t need help”... anyways, Lori came over and I knew that was beneficial because I never know when is the best time to go to the hospital and I knew she had enough experience to tell me when. She came over and we hung out until I started getting shaky. Apparently shaking is a hormonal thing and she knew it was about time to have the baby. 

We went to the hospital and when we got there they told me I was 8cm. Doctors and nurses were flooding my room, overwhelming me with questions about my past health, birth plan, if I wanted an epidural or not, etc. With so many people in the room I just assumed that meant I was going to start having to push within the hour or a little more, so I chose not to get an epidural, thinking that the pain I was experiencing was the worst of it. Jenna, Evan, and Lori were in the room with me just hanging out and I was doing great with every contraction. I was feeling confident and ready (looking back on that time I was a little cocky, I had no idea how long transition would last and how BAD it would be). 

Eventually the pain hit a level I was not expecting. I don’t remember how the situation played out but I know that I randomly yelled, “Ok jenna it was all fun and games until it wasn’t fun anymore. I need you to leave, I love you” so she left and it was just me, Evan and Lori. We got out the speaker, started playing the “o baby” playlist I made a couple weeks ago and sang through each contraction. I also did it all with my eyes clothes. that was my best pain management at the time. Then it got bad, like real bad. Like writhing around on the bed yelling (then eventually screaming) bad. I started begging for an epidural. It wasn’t uterine contractions that hurt anymore, it was my back. I kept yelling about how bad my back hurt. It was Wells coming down. They even got the anesthesiologist in there with the epidural but then she was like “if I could be frank, you gotta get your shit together if you’re going to start pushing soon,” and then idk somehow I was convinced that pushing would happen soon so I chose to turn away the epidural. Little did I know that pushing would be the hardest fucking part of the whole thing. I had been doing a good job controlling my breathing through all contractions until pushing. Once I had to push it was like I had to focus all my strength (mental and physical) on the push while holding my breath. Yeah... I had to hold my breath. Huge inhale, hold to push, and then relax. The nurse that was assigned to me was a tough cookie, real sarcastic and aggressive with me. I hated it. I wouldn’t have gotten through the pushing if it wasn’t for Lori. While Mary would tell me “Push harder, again, give it a bigger push, come on” (that kind of shit), Lori would tell me “you’re doing great, that was so good Becca, I’m so proud of you” etc. Mary was getting on my nerves so much I told her things like, “You are mean!” and Evan remembers me telling her, “Don’t fuck with me”... although I don’t remember that. I do remember cussing a lot through the pushing. It literally felt impossible. While I looked like I was dying, some people ask me if I felt like I was dying. Looking back on it now, I have no idea how I didn’t feel like I was dying. I knew I would make it through, I had thoughts that were positive like “I can’t wait until this is over, I can’t wait until they tell me this is my last push, I can’t wait until I have him on my chest.” Those aren’t negative-i’m-going-to-die thoughts. So yeah, breathing was so fucking hard. 

While I was struggling to breathe and push (the literal only way to push is to use all your muscles down there and pray you’re using the right ones, knowing full well you’ve pooped multiple times.) The doctor (oh i forgot to mention my doctor wasn’t there. it was an on call doctor. I had even the day before wrote a thank you note for her because I loved her so much and i thought she would be there for me on this day...ugh) anyyyyyways the doctor was super great and did an amazing job, but she told me that she was going to have to do an episiotomy which didn’t end up hurting then she told me his heart rate wasn’t where they wanted (basically telling me they were getting worried but in such a chill way to keep me calm) and then they got out the vacuum, which was something I thought they would have asked me about, I didn’t realize they would just decide that. But that’s ok because it was necessary because of the way Wells was situated behind my pelvis. After his head got out from the weird spot I was able to push him out on my own without the vacuum. 

Then they took him out, cleaned him up, put him on me, birthed the placenta (i have no memory of that), pushed out some extra inside stuff, stitched me up aaaaand yeah it was all so fast and crazy. I was shaking the whole time (hormones) also I was just very overwhelmed by everything. I remember everyone telling me what a good job I did, however I didn’t feel like it because of how aggressive Mary had been with me. I remember telling her something along the lines of “I felt like I let you down”. Thank god I didn’t have to see her again after she cleaned me up. My family came, Evan’s family came, Wells breast fed on both sides, and then when everyone left I got cleaned up while Wells was taken to the nursery for some tests.

Evan and I had a rough night. I didn’t realize that I could take advantage of nursery until very late which meant that Evan and I did a lot of trial and error soothing to our baby while running on little sleep. I didn’t know until the next afternoon how traumatic the entire event was for Evan. He brought up the idea of not staying in the hospital overnight again (I was told I needed to) and I was very against staying alone. Through some conversation and... just seeing Evan... he was about to have a panic attack... he was sobbing. The dude had basically just watched the love of his life practically survive dying and was being asked to stay in the same hospital where it all went down. I understood. So he went home around 830pm and Kristian came to relieve him. While it was nice having a friend in the room during the night, it was hard to do some things (like feed and sooth my baby) knowing she had to get up for work the next morning. i didn’t turn on the lights when I wanted to, didn’t recline the bed in the position I needed to get comfortable to feed, and didn’t ask her to take over to soothe like I would have if it was Evan. I did eventually ask for the nurses to come take him away so I could get some sleep... but overall it was an exhausting night.