#it's kind of hysterical to me sorry y'all

[teethrotter]

trent reznor backing vocals in ruiner: kill yourself .......................... NOW

me:

[ponderingmoonlight]

How JJK men react to different insecurities part 3

Pairings: Nanami x overweight fem! reader (requested by @deegausserr) Choso x fem!reader with big breasts (requested by anon)

Yuji/Todo x tall/curvy fem!reader (requested by @sitarawrites, @hitori979, @sophyr05 and anon, I see y'all my tall queens)

Word Count: 3k

Warnings: not 100% proofread, as usual don't read if you feel triggered by those topics, listen I literally have no boobs so I'm beyond sorry if Choso's part is shit, overweight and big breast parts contain insults (please note that this is definetely not the way I feel about it!) but also so much comfort from your favorite characters, you are beautiful just the way you are 🤍

Part 1: Nanami x reader with facial scars; Megumi x reader with small breasts; Sukuna x reader with acne (click here to read)

Part 2: Nanami x reader who doesn't want kids; Gojo x reader who gained weight; Megumi x reader with hooked nose (click here to read)

Nanami with an overweight reader

(Imaging him grabbing those ass bully girls like this okay)

You cover yourself up the minute he enters the room. He, the man who caught your eye since the beginning. He, who looks so effortlessly good in that suit. He, a well-trained man with a body like the statues in ancient Greek.

“Hey, the same as usual?”

“Thank you, (y/n).”

Just him, Kento Nanami. And you? Well, you have nothing in common with all those things. To be exact, you aren’t even sure if he ever noticed you. Why would he? You are nothing but a worker in a coffee shop, average-looking and…

You swallow. You are overweight. Not that it would bother you this much. After all, you work hard for your money each and every day, you do your best to keep your head above the water. You never really felt the urge to lose weight until reality, or rather other people, hit you.

“Oh, look who’s working again!”

“Did you already eat all those muffins? How is it possible that when you’re working, all the food is gone around this time?”

There they are again. Breathe in, breathe out. Everything is alright. Just suffering a few minutes, just letting their words hit you a little longer and they’ll be gone again. You just have to get through this. It’s not like you haven’t heard those group of actual grown-ups say those nasty things to you over a hundred times already.

But no. Today, it isn’t that easy. Because on the table in front of you sits none other than Kento Nanami who reads his paper and sips on his cup of coffee like he always does. Why do you suddenly feel the urge to defend yourself, to make them stop talking to you like that?

“Can you guys just leave me alone? I’m doing my job here, okay? Would you like to drink or eat something-“

“Fat pig”, one of the blonde girls suddenly spits at you.

This is nothing new. You should be used to it by know, all the countless insults especially that group of four girls always spits at you are too much to even count. Then why…Why do your eyes roam to his perfectly trimmed blonde undercut, why do you ball your fist in an instant?

What a dumb mistake. One of the girls follows the direction of your sight, breaking out in hysterical laughing when realizing that you were looking at Kento Nanami. No, please don’t make a stupid comment, please just grab a coffee and leave this place. Even though it hurts to get reminded of the stinging fact that you are overweight almost every single day, what hurts even most is…

“I can’t believe you! Why would a fatass like you even look in his direction? Can’t you see that he’s out of your league? God, you are so pathetic it makes my wanna cry. I mean, don’t you have a mirror at home, can’t you see that you are nothing but a fat fuck? Nobody will ever want you, (y/n). Especially not a handsome man like him.”

It’s hard for Nanami to contain his temper, hand already trembling threatful. Who do these girls think they are to talk to you in such a nasty way? You are breathtakingly stunning with eyes that radiate nothing but kindness, you work so hard each and every day. You…

You don’t deserve this.

“Leave me alone”, you mumble again.

And for the first time in forever, your throat starts to burn as well as your eyes. At this point you were so used to getting picked on that you didn’t even cry about it anymore after some time. But this…this isn’t about your weight anymore. This hits you right where it hurts.

Kento Nanami.

You don’t even dare to look his direction, eyes pierced to the ground while their venomous laughs fill the room with hatred. The urge to just get out of here, to leave this place and never return becomes almost unbearable. Maybe…maybe you should really lose some weight. Your eyes dart towards the counter in whose glass your figure is reflected.

You feel absolutely horrible and disgusting. A silent sob escapes your lips. Yes, why would someone like Kento Nanami ever want someone like you?

“Awww look at her, now she’s crying!”

You can’t take the shame anymore. Without thinking twice, you storm out of the coffee shop, ignoring your co-worker calling out your name behind. It began to rain in waterfalls, your tears now mixing with the drops from above.

There was probably never a moment in your life where you hated yourself as much as now. What where you even thinking, getting all excited every morning because of that force of a man? Were you really too dumb to realize that Kento Nanami would never fall for a girl like you?

A fat pig, a person so undisciplined that it shows, a girl that could never wear his t-shirts as a dress. You are a nobody, an ugly figure in a world full of skinny models-

“(y/n)!”

That voice makes your guts turn in an instinct, heart pounding against your chest. You pick up your pace immediately, almost running down the rainy streets of Tokyo into an alley. Of course, he followed you. After all, Kento Nanami is a gentleman out of romance books, the perfect man. But you’d rather die that let him comfort you. No, you don’t want to hear that he’s sorry about their cruel words, you don’t want him to look down at you with his pity-filled eyes.

You simply can’t take it.

“Hey, (y/n). Please look at me.”

With a swift motion, he grabs your wrist and turns you around. You feel like dying right here and now, his chocolate brown eyes seem to pierce right through your soul.

But then…

He pushes you against the wall and just kisses you. His lips collapse onto yours with so much passion that it simply takes your breath away, his eyes roaming around your body hungrily. You stare at him in sheer disbelief. Is this really happening? Are you dreaming? Countless lonely night, you imagined what it would feel like to have him this close, to feel his body against yours. And now…And now that gorgeous man pinned you against a wall.

“Don’t you dare to believe a single word they said. I promise you that they’ll never speak to you like this again. I made sure of that.”

It feels so surreal, almost too good to be true. Is he only doing this out of pity, because he doesn’t want you to feel bad? Your heart sinks painfully. Is that what this is about?

“You don’t have to do that so I’m feeling better”, you mumble against his lips.

Instinctively, you cross your arms in front of your chest, hiding you like you always do around him.

“I’m not saying this to make you feel better”, he replies in an instant, hands gently untucking your arms to place his own around your waist.

“I’m saying this because I can’t take my eyes off you since I saw you the first time I stepped into this café. You have to be the most beautiful person I have ever seen, (y/n). I adore your delicate curves, your inviting smile, your unshakable character. I love the way your hair falls and how you prepare my coffee. I adore you just the way you are. Did you really think I’m there because of the coffee? It’s not that good if you’re asking me.”

His comment makes you giggle your tears away and shaking your head at the same time.

“Yeah, the coffee isn’t that great to be honest”, you comment.

“But you are.”

He looks down at you all serious again, his intense gaze making your knees go weak in an instant.

“And I want nothing more than to take you out to a nice restaurant.”

Choso with a reader who has big breasts

You were never keen to meet new people, especially men. Not because you aren’t talkative or enjoy others company. No, it’s because you never know how they’ll react when seeing you for the first time.

Even though especially other women are jealous of you because of how big your breasts are, you truly hate them. It seems like the second you meet someone, all they have eyes for is your cleavage. No matter if you wear a baggy shirt, your uniform or one of the dresses you normally adore so much, your boobs come first. And you fucking hate it.

“Hey, why are you so nervous, (y/n)? I’m sure you and Choso will get along just fine!”, Yuji tries to cheer you up with a kind smile.

“And probably your-“

“Shut up right now, moron”, Megumi mumbles instinctively.

You sign to yourself. It’s clear that he’s just trying to be nice and funny, but to be honest you want to cry. Since puberty hit you, no one ever saw you like an individual anymore. No, you are either sexualized or body-shamed.

“Would you crush me with your melons for some money? C’mon (y/n).”

“There she is again. Look at her tits!”

“She’s just showing off. What a slut.”

“I bet those would be a good ass pillow.”

You are so damn tired of it. Tired of all the people talking about you behind your back, tired of being nothing but a sex object, tired of having no character. Even though here at Jujutsu High, people seem to finally get that you are indeed a human being all by yourself and would never talk badly about you, you can feel their looks.

“Oh, there he is! Come on, (y/n)!”

No, no, no. Is it too late to just turn around and leave this place? Maybe Maki is still free, you should go and grab a drink with her. Or even better, barricade yourself into your dorm and return when this man is gone.

“You must be (y/n). My little brother told me a lot about you”, a dark voice introduces itself.

Your eyes dart up in panic. Oh, you just know how this goes. First of all, he’ll look down at your breasts. If he’s having at least a spark of decency, his eyes will dart back to your face and roam around when he thinks you’re not paying any attention. And maybe, just maybe, he won’t mention your cleavage for quite some time.

“Nice to meet you”, you mumble annoyed already.

Huh, his eyes rest right on your face, a small smile forming itself on his lips. You tilt your head to the side, squint your eyes in confusion. Well, this is definitely new. He didn’t even look at them, not a single glimpse onto your body.

“Is it true that you have a thing for blood manipulation? Yuji told me you are interested in learning more about that technique.”

“Well, yeah…”

You have to blink a few times. He is so…different from everyone else. Not even Megumi resisted the urge to look down at you, you even heard him talking about it with Yuji someday. But this man…what was his name again? Choso? He seems to be curious about…

You. Nothing but you.

“I am quite skilled when it comes to blood manipulation. If you want, I will gladly show you a few things.”

“Y-yeah…I mean…That would be nice. Like, today?”, you stutter awkwardly, completely caught off guard by this unexpected change of scenery.

“If you have time, of course.”

“Okay, then…I’ll change now.”

“I’ll meet you at the training field.”

“Yeah…”, you mutter.

As soon as you leave the room, Yuji seems to finally regain your voice.

“And? What do you think about her?”

“I think she seems quite nice for a human being.”

“And what else?”

A big pause that makes your heart shatter for a brief moment. Maybe he isn’t as different as you thought. Maybe he’s just thinking about your cleavage like everybody else does, maybe-

“I don’t know what you mean.”

“Haven’t you seen her,…y’know…Megumi?”

“He means her breasts”, Megumi clarifies.

“Why would I look at her breasts when she seems to have an interesting character?”

Your heart almost beats out of your chest, ears literally unable to comprehend what you’ve just heard. It really shouldn’t touch you like that. But oh, the second you begin to realize what that stranger just said your eyes get glossy. It might only be a little statement for him, but it surely means the world to you.

In a world that shames on you for something you can’t change, in a world in which men only took you on dates or talked to you because of your breasts and not because of your personality.

Choso seems to be the first person who genuinely doesn’t give a fuck about the way you look. And oh does it feel nice.

“Maybe you’re not as bad as I thought”, you mumble to yourself.

Yuji and Todo with a cury/tall girl

Just one look at him seems to sweep you off your feet. The way he walks, the way he talks, simply the way he carries himself. It wasn’t hard to fall for Yuji, but it was definitely rough to find out he isn’t interested in you.

“What kind of woman is Yuji actually into?”

Nobara looked at you up and down, visibly bamboozled about what you’ve just asked. There aren’t many things she doesn’t think about, but Yuji Itadori’s type is definitely one of them.

“I don’t know girl…But I guess he’s the type for rather short girls, don’t ya think?”

You hated the way your heart instantly began to ache in your ribcage. Of course he does. Aren’t all boys nowadays into petite girls with a bubbly personality? And to be honest, you are none of that.

Taller than all the other girls and even some boys around Jujutsu High, curvier than anyone else, probably uglier than the rest. You never put much thought into all of these things, but right. Why would Yuji be any different from all the guys you’ve met before?

“Who the hell is this woman, Itadori?”

Todo can’t help but shamelessly stare at you. This is too good to be true, a sight straight out of his dreams. You…You are even better than Takada-chan.

“Huh? Oh, that’s (y/n)”, he replies with a small grin, just one look at you making his heart stumble all over again.

He hasn’t seen you in quite some time now that he thinks of it.

“What kind of woman is your type, Itadori Yuji?”

The pink-haired boy has to blink a few times, eyes still set on your delicious curves and gorgeous long legs.

“I like tall woman with a big ass.”

“Is that your final answer?”, he huge boy next to him urges, grabbing him by his uniform so roughly that his eyes yank away from you.

“Yes!”, he replies immediately.

“Then get going, we need to talk to this beauty over there”, he announces, dragging Yuji behind him before he is even able to reply.

You tilt your head to the side. What the hell is going on over there? Who is that shirtless guy and…is that Yuji he drags behind him as if he’s taking out trash?

“You!”, he shouts into your direction, eyes seem to pierce right through your soul.

What the hell is this about? Should you run away, cry for help? He definitely looks pretty dangerous to you with the way his muscles seem to grow with every step he takes towards you.

“Hey, let me go! I can walk by myself!”, Yuji protests.

“Now talk to her”, Todo hisses, almost pushing him into you.

“Oh, hi (y/n)!”

“Well, hi Yuji…”, you answer rather confused.

You look even better from over here, your body lingering over his own by a few centimetres. Yes, you have to be the biggest woman Yuji has ever seen with a character so badass that no one can hold a candle to you. And those curves, those oh so delicious curves…

“Tell her what kind of woman is your type”, the guy next to him demands harshly.

“Stop being so damn loud, she hears you!”

“Oh, I definitely do. What is all of this bullshit about and what kind of freak are you exactly?”

“Itadori loves tall woman with a big ass.”

Well, that’s rather unexpected. Yuji turns as red as a tomato, not daring to shoot a single glimpse your way. But Nobara said that he likes petite girls and somehow, this always made sense to you. Still, his body doesn’t lie. And the fact that he doesn’t say anything against it tells you…

“You like tall woman with a big ass”, you repeat.

“Well, to be honest, I just like you, (y/n)”, he mutters along with scratching the back of his head awkwardly.

“I like you too. You have to be the hottest girl I’ve ever seen. Let me cherish you for the rest of our lives”, the guy named Todo purrs.

“Hey, I thought you were my wingman and now you’re trying to steal my girl away from me!”, Yuji protests.

“When did I ever say that, moron? We might be brothers, but this right here is my girl-“

“WE ARE NOT BROTHERS AND (Y/N) IS NOT YOUR GIRL!”

“I’ve been crazy about you for so long. I can’t believe you actually find me attractive, Yuji”, you interrupt their little chitchat.

Your heart feels light as a feather, so good that you are almost think about giggling out in sheer joy.

“Are you kidding? You are what dreams are made of, (y/n)! I was just too shy to admit…”

“I’d never be too shy to show my love. Pick me, (y/n)!”

“GET AWAY FROM HERE!”

“I’M NOT LEAVING MY GIRL BEHIND!”

"That's enough, I'm leaving. See you around guys", you announce with a sly grin.

"OUCH, DID YOU JUST SLAP ME TODO!?"

"JUST THE WAY YOU DESERVE IT, ITADORI!"

Tags: @arehzhera @ploylulla @tzubaki @beatrexworld @kenstarsworld @hellkaiserinphoenix  @lauv4chuuya @shadowfoxey @starlightanyaaa @sindela @kayleegomez @sunshine7queen @magalimachete @mokoartpost @gatitam @idontknow1123 @creative1writings @sanicsmut  @mynahx3 @sad-darksoul @chilichopsticks @hellkaiserinphoenix @chuyasthighs0 @ynackerman9499 @keepghostly @wxwieeee @lovelyluna1 @froufrousnowman @hidazinie @tomiokathedepresso @gojosrealwife  @coffeeluvr96 @mahi-tamashi @weebotaku21 @chaoticwinnercupcake @lees-chaotic-brain  @risuola  @sugurulefttesticle @wordskeeper @baku2345 @polarbvnny @ruixrei @bam-bam-bam-bame-blog @lavenderdrxp @localhehecat @alicerhr @kayleegomez @belovedvamp @wifenanami @chilichopsticks @dlwlrmas-world @oikawarz

[novantinuum]

Fandom: Steven Universe Rating: Mature Audiences (For references to underage sex) Words: 2.8K~ Summary: It’s possible. The timing lines up. What Connie fears is one hundred percent possible. The problem is, a potential pregnancy this early into their relationship was absolutely not in their plans.

WOE, post canon Connverse pregnancy scare fic be upon ye.

This is honest to god the fastest I've ever written a fic of this length in my whole ass life- I thought of this idea literally last night and nailed it all out in like twelve straight hours. Just so y'all can make an informed decision on whether to read or sit out, this contains minimal description of actual sex beyond like one short paragraph- instead focusing in on the human fallout of poor teenage decision making.

Connie is 17 and already in college, and Steven is 19.

On a semi-related topic, Google absolutely believes I'm pregnant now after all the incessant research I did for this story, lmafo.

Enjoy! I'm putting basically all of this fic under a cut here due to its mature topic nature.

__

If you asked Steven what kind of conversation he expected when Connie called him out of the blue at one AM in the morning, one where she’s hysterical and halfway to hyperventilating definitely wouldn’t have been at the top of his list.

“Woah, woah—” he stresses, passing the phone to his other ear so he can pick on up what she’s saying better. “Just— slow down, okay? Start from the beginning. What’s happened?”

“It’s been three days, Steven!” she says, voice hitching upon his name. “I know my cycle, okay?? I’ve been tracking my cycle ever since I started menstruating, and it’s supposed to be like goddamn clockwork! It’s never been late like this. Never!”

“And you’re, uh— you’re absolutely sure there’s nothing else that could be interfering-??”

“Of course I’m fucking sure!” she hollers, making the small speaker bar on his phone vibrate against the side of his head. 

He winces, already regretting his poor choice of words with her. 

“Okay, okay, I— I shouldn’t have pressed about that. I’m sorry. Just—” he sucks in a deep breath of air, doing his absolute beat not to delve down the dangerous implication filled rabbit hole this early on, when tensions are high and accurate information is sorely limited— “what do you need right now? What can I do to help?”

“I need you here,” she warbles, her hysteria finally pushing over the brim and transforming into a heartbreaking bounty of distraught cries. “With me—!”

He clamps down upon the inside of his lip, thinking. The unfortunate part of living two timezones away from a romantic partner is that their transportation options for emergency visitations are limited. Unless… 

“Is Lion with you?” he asks, crossing his fingers and hoping beyond all hopes that this aloof feline miraculously chose this evening to make a visit at Connie’s off campus group home.

“I-I…” Brief pause. There’s a faint ruffle in the line, probably her shifting position. “I think he’s outside, yes.”

“If you can send him over to me, I’ll be there as fast as I can. Okay?”

“Okay,” she whispers, hoarse and strained. 

“We’ll figure this out, I promise. Love you.”

“Love you…”

And with that, Connie hangs up from her end.

Steven’s humble little studio apartment falls into complete and utter silence. He cradles his phone in his hands, staring with unparalleled intensity at his seventeen-year-old girlfriend’s smiling contact photo for a good few minutes… contemplating the sheer daunting weight of the potential future life’s just sprung on them out of nowhere. 

It’s possible.

The timing lines up.

What Connie fears is one hundred percent possible.

“Shit,” he ultimately hisses, shoving the device in his back pocket and moving to grab his wallet, his keys, and a light jacket.

This was absolutely not the conversation he expected to have tonight.

_____

One trip to his local 24-hour convenience store and a ride on Lion later, Steven finds himself perched on the edge of Connie and her housemates’ shared couch holding the instructional pamphlet for a pregnancy test, intensely conscious of the sleep shattering noise they’re probably making out here despite their best attempts at whispering. Ugh. He really, really hopes they don’t wake Patricia or Natalie up with all this racket. He doesn’t want to be rude, especially not at the heart of midterms season.

“But this says you’re not supposed to take it until a week after your first missed period,” he says, tapping his finger at the relevant section of fine print.

“That doesn’t mean it’s not gonna work at all, though,” Connie shoots back, tussling the instructions from his hands. “Look, see—? It doesn’t say you’re not supposed to take it until then, it just says the results may have a higher chance of inaccuracy.”

“And isn’t accuracy exactly what we need at the moment?” he responds with a bit too much stress riding within his tone. 

(His thoughts trail back to almost three weeks ago. That kissing session that got a bit more heated than either of them had originally planned for. The expired condom that he didn’t realize was expired until after it broke in the middle of sex.)

She shoots him a withering look, her eyes puffy and damp from all the tears she’s already shed tonight. 

“No, what I need is an answer. Any answer, so I can finally go to bed and stop freaking the hell out over this. You know how I am— I just gotta rip the bandaid off, and then I’ll be fine. I’ll even test daily for the next week if that makes you feel better.”

“Whatever makes you feel better,” he gently redirects, capturing her trembling hand within his and rubbing faint circles against the side of her palm for a few precious moments.

Sniffling, she gives a faint nod, grabbing the test itself from the coffee table and moving to stand.

“Okay. I… I’ll be just a few minutes. I’ll come back out once I have the sample ready, a-and… and then we can wait together.”

“Take your time,” he says.

She does.

As it turns out, peeing on demand (and on a plastic test strip, no less) is pretty difficult, even more so when one is stressed beyond all belief. 

They keep in contact over text for those long twenty or so minutes, and it’s through this feed of discussion that he starts to piece together the full picture of what must’ve happened here.

Mistake number one: Connie knew she was in a fertile period. She knew, and— horny as she was at the time— decided to progress the speed of their lovemaking anyways. All her choice. She provided him a condom she’d gotten as a free sample from some university health fair, and off they went. In any normal circumstance, that’s where this story would stop.

But then came mistake number two: right as he neared the brink of orgasm, he felt a distinct jump in sensitivity— one that not only sent him careening right over the edge, but also alerted him to the fact that his condom must’ve snapped. He’s almost positive Connie felt it too. He pulled out as quick as he could the second he realized, but what’s done was done. 

They discovered big mistake number three right afterwards: The condom was already expired. It was expired all along, and neither of them had thought to check the label before slipping it on. Stupid. Connie promised she’d talk to the campus nurse about getting her hands on some free Plan B that next morning— just in case— and Steven assumed that was the end of it. 

But then there was mistake number four: Apparently, Connie never took that Plan B at all. She was so wigged out over one of her upcoming midterms in a class she’s barely passing that (as he learns via this text thread) she forgot to go to the nurse to inquire about it in the first place. By the time she remembered, too many days had passed for it to be effective, so she didn’t bother looking into it further. Instead she merely crossed her fingers that nothing would come of this series of unfortunate happenings whatsoever, but then came late period day number one. And then number two. And then number three. And by that point, the evidence seemed so stacked against her favor that the stress simply exploded. She couldn’t study. She couldn’t even sleep. Thus, she just has to secure an answer tonight, or she’ll never find any peace, she says.

He understands, he does.

But also… he really, really wants to make sure that whatever answer they settle on with this matter is guaranteed correct. And soon, while there’s still time to do something about it (if that’s what she wants) without too much emotional investment coming into play.

Because accidentally knocking up his girlfriend in her second year of college… before they’re even married or close to being engaged… and while she’s still seventeen to boot was absolutely not in their plans.

“Ughhh… stupid, stupid,” he hisses to himself, knocking his head against the plush backing of the sofa. 

If that damned test comes back positive, her mother (and heck, probably Pearl too, for that matter) is going to kill him.

While he wouldn’t mind being a father in a few years’ time, the fact of thee matter is that they’re nowhere close to ready for such a future at this current juncture. Neither of them have jobs. Neither of them have a home of their own that isn’t partially paid for by their parents. Hell, on his end, even with regular therapy and steady medication he still struggles with the most basic self-care like showering daily and remembering to eat breakfast. So how on Earth— if Connie’s fears are right, and she is positive— is he supposed to suddenly pivot to taking care of an infant too on top of all that? Oh stars he’s not ready for this. He’s not. 

And if that’s how he feels, then he can’t even begin to imagine how much terror must be surging through her mind at this present moment.

Yikes. He’s really made a mess of things, hasn’t he? He should’ve… ugh, he should’ve said something. He should’ve gently told her ‘no’ the moment she revealed she was only a day away from ovulation. He shouldn’t have taken the risk. He should’ve thought to check in with her about the Plan B instead of blindly assuming she took care of it. He’s older, so he should’ve been the responsible one. 

He tells her as such.

no, no… it takes two to tango, silly, she responds via text a few seconds later. it’s not your fault any more than it’s mine. im sorry for yelling at you earlier, it’s just. not what i had planned.

same, he responses. 

And then, after a hard swallow and a moment’s pause… he dares to rustle up that big ol’ elephant in the room.

He asks The Question.

have u thought about what you’re gonna do if its positive yet

A set of ellipses show up at the bottom of the screen. She’s typing. Slowly. 

Or maybe… 

The ellipses disappear for a bit. Then reappear. Then blink out existence once again.

Steven sighs, sinking back into the couch and setting his phone upside down so he doesn’t have to psych himself out by staring expectantly at her contact photo at the top of their text feed for the next goodness knows how long. 

Good grief. If he weren’t already so damn emotionally drained over all this, he’s sure he’d be glowing bright ass pink right now. Thank goodness he’s not. Connie needs his comfort tonight, not the other way around. His lip crinkles into a pensive frown as he reflects on the situation… shifts his gaze around the darkened living room. (He catches the faintest glimpse of Lion snoozing outside the window again as his eyes adjust to the light level.) For the briefest of seconds he considers shooting a text to Dad, curious if he might have any advice on how to handle this sort of situation, but then…

No, no. It’s far too early to say anything. Plus, he doesn’t want to risk letting the blunt reality of their active sex life break containment unless Connie says it’s okay.

His phone buzzes.

Heart pounding with unimaginable ferocity, he flips it over to read.

honestly the reason i’m so freaked out rn is that i think id really wanna keep it. even though im SURE it would mess up all my college goals. is that stupid??

Brief pause yet again as she adds something else.

i’m so, so sorry i know that might not be something you’re ready to commit to rn. that’s half of why i’m so upset. i don’t want this to speed up our relationship in ways you’re not ready for, or ruin it altogether

Steven’s inhale is sharp and shallow, his thoughts racing as he tries not to consider the potential implications of what her decision means for him too deeply. It’s not about me, he reminds himself. It’s not about me.

hey, no- it’s okay, he types, fingers shaking. don’t fuss about me. it’s your body. your choice. i’ll support you through whatever you decide. promise.

Send.

A good while passes without a response. 

Considering the heaviness of the topic, he’s half a mind to stride across the room and go knock on the bathroom door to see if she’s okay, but then that very door squeaks open.

Connie scuttles to the couch in a hurry, the test and a generous wad of toilet paper in hand. She lays down the paper on the coffee table first for cleanliness’ sake, and sets the plastic sample cartridge on top of it.

Then, with a weary sigh, she sets a timer on her phone for three minutes.

“Please don’t let me look at it until time’s up,” she says, slumping against his side for comfort. 

“It’s okay,” he whispers, shifting his position to wrap his arms tight around her. Secure. Safe. “We’re okay. Whatever happens, we do it together, all right?”

“All right.”

Noticing her heavy blinking and angling to help her feel better, he brushes a stray wavy lock back behind her ear, his touch as delicate as he can muster. “Hey. Jam buds?”

“Jam buds,” she nods with a watery smile.

They sit in silence for about thirty seconds, allowing each others’ racing heartbeats to lull them to at least some form of camaraderie laden relief.

Or at least, they try to.

“My mom is not gonna be happy about this,” Connie says out of the blue, attaching words to the daunting thought they’re clearly both stewing over.

“If it’s positive,” he reminds her. “It’s still a big if.”

“But I’m right though. I was an underage accident, too, remember? I just—” her voice breaks as she chokes back what he fears might be an impending sob— “I know she wanted better for me. I don’t want to disappoint her, y’know?”

He risks a dry joke to lighten the mood.

“Well… at least if she’s mad, you have the excuse that it runs in the family to fall back on, right?”

“Oh, shut up, you,” she says with a half-hearted giggle, playfully shrugging him away.

They lapse into a peaceful quiet yet again.

He busies himself tracing abstract shapes against the knob of her shoulder, doing his best to help ground her amidst this unexpected squall in their relationship.

“How much time’s left?” she asks, her tone shrunken and nervous 

Steven glances over at her phone on the table. “Just a few more seconds.”

The timer goes off a mere cluster of heartbeats later.

Taking a deep breath as one committed unit, their hands inseparably intertwined, the two lean forward to investigate the pregnancy test together.

There’s only a single band visible in the results window, where the control should be.

Negative.

Steven lets out what’s quite possibly the biggest exhale of his full nineteen years.

Thank the stars.

That’s step one.

It’s still not a solid confirmation— not with this singular test taken so early into what she fears is a missed cycle— but it’s a start.

“What does it mean that a tiny part of me is kinda disappointed now…?” Connie asks him afterwards, sinking backwards into the couch’s soft embrace. 

“It means we’ll have to try again in a few years,” he says, giving the crown of her head a soft kiss. “When we’re actually ready.

_____

Connie tests again just a few hours later that morning. 

Then the next day.

And the next.

All negative.

Much to their relief, their one hundred percent conclusive answer comes on day three, when she calls him at the literal crack of dawn with immense excitement to report the belated start of her period.

Just to be extra sure, she makes a walk-in appointment at the university clinic to talk through the scare with one of their doctors on day four.

“It was that damn anxiety med I just started,” she relays to him over the phone later that evening. “I didn’t even think about it. Apparently medications that function as antidepressants run the risk of screwing up your cycle a bit. Thus, the delay.”

“Well, now we know for the future, yeah?” 

“Yeah,” she says with a faint chuckle. “That, and the importance of never using cheap free sample condoms. Ugh… I’m gonna be so paranoid about expiration dates, now.”

He frowns, rapping his fingertips against the arm of his desk chair.

“Hey, listen— don’t get all worked up over it, okay? Like you’ve said before, it takes two to tango. We never have to do anything you’re not explicitly comfortable with.”

“Yes, yes, you’re right,” she acquiesces. “Of course you’re right… Still, I guess the silver lining of all this is that now I know I actually want children someday.”

“Same,” he says, his chest fluttering with unquestionable affection. “Let’s get you through college first, though. Then we’ll talk.” 

Connie giggles, lively and free. The sound is spellbinding music to his ears.

“Sounds like a deal, Biscuit.”

[seoliee]

Driving Fear Into Your Heart

Word Count: 2.7k words

Pairing: X x Reader

TW: Cursing, Kidnapping, Stabbing, Yandere Tendencies (Pls read smth else if not comfortable)

A/N: I said this was inspired by X's halloween theme skin, but idk this maybe how I perceived it instead? Anyhow, lemme know y'all thoughts <3

In a dark and hollow forest somewhere near the city. Where only fragments of moonlight shone through the small crevices of the tall trees branches and its leaves. It was eerily silent, until swaying locks of hair pass through the bushes in a haste.

A girl ran barefooted, cracking sounds of dried leaves filled her hearing, leaving a trail behind. Her complexion was pale, fear stricken and distressed. Her body felt sore and drained, it was only sheer adrenaline that made her push through.

Her feet were starting to hurt, forming small cuts and bruises on the sole. She has to stop running at some point, but she can't. Not when she's running for her life.

~*4 days ago*~

She was in the cafeteria, sitting along with her friend at their usual booth and chatting about ramdom stuff. Just like the usual. She was attentively listening when her childhood friend X, came into view along with his own fair share of group.

She found herself falling out of the conversation and instead decided to watch him from a distance. Only did her friend's voice broke her out of the trance with a small nudge.

"Don't stare at him too much or he'll melt." Her friend says teasingly, chuckling at her obvious crush at the lab nerd.

"I-I wasn't staring!" She quickly rebukes her claim, though her blood red cheeks and ear were contradicting it.

"Yeah yeah, whatever. Anyway.." Her friend's tone suddenly became serious, which made her get a bit confused as her friend seldom becomes serious during their conversations. "Have you heard about the kidnappings that's happening near the university recently?"

She shakes her head. She's been too absorbed on finishing her research paper these past few days that she blocked out any kind of gossips or news that would distract her from concentrating. She even went as far as to cancel all her plans of hanging out with X.

"There were a total of three missing cases reported and all of them were  students of different universities near our campus."

"The authorities haven't gotten a single clue whether it's a solo or a group operation. Either way, the kidnappers are still out there so do be careful."

Her warning sent a chill down her spine, terrified that such happenings were happening near them. Those poor students, she hopes that they were at least safe and alive.

She sent her friend a reassuring smile, squeezing her hand in a comforting way. "Don't worry. I always walk home with X anyway. You should be careful too."

"Oh, I'll be fine. Besides, I'm going on a date with y'know who later..." Her friend managed to light up the mood immediately by redirecting into another topic that she knew, she would interested in.

"What?? Since when? Tell me the fucking details!" She exclaims hysterically, practically slapping her hands down on the table earning a few strange looks from the people around them. She couldn't care less though.

Alas, the final bell rang throughout the halls signaling the end of the day. Tired groans from her fellow students and a few hastily gathers up their things, wanting to leave immediately.

As for her, she's delighted to walk home with him again after for so long only to be met with disappoinment.

"Sorry, (Y/n). I promised the guys I would hang out with them afterschool so I won't be able to walk you home." X says apologetically, a troubled smile grazing his handsome features.

He could see how your bright and grinning gorgeous face warps into a look of disappointment, making him feel guilty. "I can cancel it though. I'd rather be with you anyway."

The disappointment in her face quickly turns into a sheepish smile as she shook her head for a no. "No, it's alright. I can walk home with my friend instead." She obviously can't make him cancel his plans just for her satisfaction. After all, he has a life of his own.

"You sure? I could really—"

"Hey, X! You coming or what?!" One of his friends yells from a far, having an impatient look while the others grin at him in a teasing manner as they watch the scene unfold.

"Be there in a sec!" He yells back in response, looking over his shoulders with his eyebrows furrowed in annoyance. He looked back at her in disbelief. "Sorry about that. I gotta go. Remember to text me once you got home, okay?"

"I will." She chuckles, fondly grinning as light pink hue flows to her cheeks. This made X's heart softened, huffing a tiny chuckle as he brush a stray hair behind her ear.

"Be safe, my little lamb."

She watches as he ran up to his friends, some of them teasing him for the little moment they had. She's glad to know he found good friends despite his peculiar personality, he meant well.

~•~

After getting off the bus, the way to her apartment was already a bit dark and somewhat silent than usual at her on time arrival at dawn. Though, that's to be expected as she's staying in a peaceful neighborhood which she should be thankful for.

The soles of her shoes clicks on the pavement on each step she makes, the soft cold breeze of air moving past her ear as chills ran down her spine. Her surroundings were dark, the only light present were from the flickering street lights and the moon above her, which she thinks added to her paranoia.

She doesn't know if it's because she isn't used to walking home alone or is there someone watching her? She swore she could feel eyes from everywhere around her.

As she turned to a corner, footsteps sudden came to light from behind. She didn't thought anything of it, as it could be a passerby or a neighbor. Thankfully, she's near to her home so she briskly walked and much to her surprise, the person behind her began to speed up.

This set off alarm bells in her head, once she could see the light from her porch. She began to ran and screamed for help. However, all hope is lost once she felt a sharp pain struck behind her head as darkness engulf her sight.

~*~

A horrible stench whapped into her nose, as consciousness slowly seeped back into her figure. She pry her eyes open, blinking away the drowsiness as her vision clears up and able to take in her surroundings.

She's sat in the corner of a crusty room, the wallpapers were ripped and moldy. The pipes above her were leaking with merky water which where the awful stench came from. The windows in the room were boarded, as nothing but the gush of wind and crickets were heard from the outside.

She tried to move, but found it difficult as her wrists were tightly bounded together from behind to a pipe. She found it quite hard to breath because of the tight cloth on her lips. Panic fills her body as she heard heavy footsteps, and an unknown man had entered the room.

She glares at him, which made him smirk at her feistiness. He bends down to her eye level, and pats her head. "You're a pretty one, aren't you?"

His breath fans to her face, which made her feel nauseous and wants to puke at the horrible smell of alcohol and poor oral hygiene coming from him. He took off the cloth that's covering her mouth and traced his disgusting thumb across her bottom lip.

She didn't hesitate to bite down on his finger, hard enough to make him scream and recoil his hand away as blood rushes out of the bite. The man was furious and smashed the bottle of alcohol in his hand and points the severed half towards her.

"Don't fuck with me, woman. I can—" He was cut off when he heard a buzz coming from his phone. He clicked his tongue and immediately answers the phone, proceeding to leave the room.

Once he's out of sight, all the energy seeped out of her body as hot tears rushes down her cheeks. Tears trickle down to her knees, as she kept her mouth close to silent her ugly sobs. Her chest felt so tight, she's scared, deeply scared. She didn't think something like this could happen to her. Not when after being warned by her friend.

Then, she saw a faint glimmer from her peripheral vision. She looks up and saw a piece of broken glass from the bottle near her. She uses her foot to reach towards the shard and manages to push it to her side and tries her best to grab it.

Once she successfully got it, she began to slowly cut the rope, but found it to be quite thick and tough for the nibble blade.

It took her roughly 3 days before she could finally cut the rope because she was constantly interrupted by people coming in and sometimes watching over her. She felt drained as she refused to eat anything they gave her, but it didn't matter because she'll be out of her in no time.

She pushed her body up, and slowly walked up to the door, careful not to make any noise. She turns the knob and opens a small gap to peek. It was silent and there was only one man outside, and he was sleeping soundly, practically snoring.

She gently swing the door open, careful to not make it creek as she steps out of the room. She held in her breath as she began to take light steps behind the sleeping man. She sucked in her breath as the man began to turn in his sleep, rendering her still as she kept her eyes on him. Once she deemed it was safe, she continues her way to the door.

She steps out into the cold night, as a smile finally crept to her lips, tasting her freedom. Only for panic to once again surge as one of the men guarding outside saw her and calls to her, alerting the others.

She didn't think twice and ran into the dark woods. She didn't mind if twigs poked the sole of her feet, nor if she stepped on pointed pebbles. She just ran wherever she could, taking sharp turns to confuse her captors.

She could hear their voices getting farther, but she knows she shouldn't celebrate yet as the woods were hollow and wasn't sure if she's heading towards civilization or deeper in.

Her speed slow down as her adrenaline began to dissipate, she's breathless and looks around for any source of life. Much to her surprise, a hand had grabbed her wrist and instinctively she swipped her hand forcefully and elbows whoever it is.

The person grunts and moans in pain, the voice was oddly familiar. The person lights up their phone to their face, and soon she was able to make out who he was.

"You pack a mean elbow, little lamb." X smiles, chuckling despite the stinging pain on his nose. "Makes me think you didn't actually needed me."

His face quickly transforms into a scowl, looking back once he heard numerous of voices barking behind them. Without another word, he took her wrist and guided her out of the woods.

She saw his motorcycle parked by the side of the road, she hopped on and X quickly stepped onto the pedal as they drove away.

Her hands tightly hugged the small of his waist, leaning her head against his broad back as she tries to catch her breath. Her feet were in pain as well as her whole body. She couldn't stop shaking, as she cried on his back.

She felt his hand comfortably brush against hers, which sent butterflies inside her stomach flutter in ease.

"How.. did you find me?" She asks, keeping her head close to his back and listens to his faint heartbeat.

"I finally managed to track your gps using my phone and followed its location." He replies, keeping his voice low and words consise. "Sorry it took me a while. I had to first know your ips before managing to connect. Thank god, your phone is in working order too or I won't be able to track you."

His words flew into her ear, but she couldn't make sense of it as her energy began to lower that's she finding it difficult to keep her eyes open. "Thank you, X."

"No worries. After all, you know I'm always here for you." She could hear the usual smile in his voice. She finally lets herself rest and is unable to hear his next words.

"And I'm all that you need, and no one else matters, my little lamb."

A sickening and sadistic smile curls up to his lips, chuckling lowly.

~•~

X dumps a bucket full of cold water down on the unconscious person tied up to a chair infront of him. The man, jolts awake and flickers his eyes up at X.

"Good, good. You're finally awake. Did you slept well?" X muses, keeping the usual permanent smile on his face.

The man didn't bother to answer, starting to wiggle his way out of the chair in panic. X was displeased by this, but made no action and instead clicked his tongue.

The man finally stopped trying, his energy running low. "You bastard! Why are you doing this, X?! Let me go!"

The man's voice was irritating to X's ears, but he was glad to respond to his question in a simple and conventional manner.

X had walked up to the nearby switch and flicks it. Light began to shine on the wall littered with pictures. Pictures of (Y/n). His cheeks reddens as he took a step closer to the wall, his eyes flickering at each picture he took throughout the years in complete secrecy.

"Don't you think she's beautiful?" X asks the man, which confuses him and found the revelation quite disturbing.

"W-What...?"

"You asked why I'm doing this and it's because of her." X says, turning towards him once more. He took a step closer to a nearby table, his hand brushing against each tool on it. "I am merely protecting her from the filth swarming around her and trying to take what's mine..."

X grips the handle of a sharp and bloodied knife in his hand, taking slow steps towards the now frantic man who's eyes are filled with terror as he tries to reason with him.

X stops infront of him, bending down to his eye level. He moves his face closer to him, keeping his heterochromatic eyes into the man's terrified and shaking ones, a sadistic smile slowly forming on his lips. "This wouldn't have happened if you just kept your distance from her and not end up in the same predicament like the others..."

X had driven the knife into the man's throat, and pulls it back out. He watches as the man gurgle in his own blood rushing out of his mouth. He continues his attack until he was satisfied.

He only stopped a buzz emits in his pocket that came from his phone. With his bloodied hand, he tapped the screen and answers the caller.

"You got her? That's good news!" X muses, as he nods at the following sentences from the person in the other line.

His eyes flickers down to the mutilated and lifeless man in front of him, blood pours down onto the ground and pools around his shoes. He clicked his tongue, thinking he made quite a mess this time.

"Yeah yeah, I got it. Remember, don't touch her. Unless, you got a death wish." X warns before ending the call. He began to walk towards the wall swapped with photos of you, filling his heart with love and feeling of ease.

"Sorry, my little lamb. You just have to learn the hard way this time." X took a certain picture from the wall, looking down on it with a soft eyes and smile. It was a picture of them back when they were still children.

"And this time, with driving fear into your heart. You'll realize that I'm the only you'll ever need and trust after I come and save you."

~•~

I think I flunked this lol.

Thanks for reading though <3

Happy holidays everyone!!!

[coffeelovesdramasalatte]

LITA Ep. 5 Rewatch Thoughts Part 1

(edit bc I started writing this post like 6 months ago - hi! I'm gonna finish going through the rest of the phayurain episodes of LITA finally! I've lost all sense of shame so these posts are just gonna be love letters to Eul, hope that's ok) Hi hi hi! I find it absolutely hilarious that the notes on the final part of my episode 4 rewatch post (which contains my best screenshots of That Scene) has like triple the notes of the rest of the parts. I love the thirsty LITA fam <3 I think I kept it mostly clean for the first 3 episodes but LITA brainrot is real and from here on out I'm putting down all my deranged thoughts into words so enjoy

Onwards to episode 5!! Ok so y'all should know by this point that BossNoeul sang the opening right? I added it on spotify and have listened to it on repeat so much over the last week that I could probs (badly, bc my singing voice leaves much to be desired but I can and will belt it at the top of my lungs) karaoke it now. If y'all haven't heard the full version check it out bc they rap a few bars and Noeul has this line "shake your bo- shake your bo- shake your body" that makes me lose it every time

The recap sees us revisiting some rather adorable moments from the previous episode including PhayuRain in the rain and tub. Imagine if they stuck the leg kiss in the recap >.<

We open to sunlight pouring in through the curtained windows on the morning after. I kind of wish the last episode had ended with this scene bc it would have been a soft transition after the intimacy PhayuRain shared rather than the abrupt cut to credits. But I digress.

Phayu's hair looks glorious out and I wish we'd gotten to see it like this more. In fact I think we should've seen Rain push his hands through it and grip it during episode 6's NC scene. Also the definition of that bicep? Sir pls.

I ADORE how sweet Phayu is towards Rain all the time, and this is yet another example. I love it when characters look fondly at their lover (I finally get to use that word for them!!), cover them with a blanket, and then give them a forehead kiss before sliding out of bed. SO FOND

I just think it's really attractive when people do this. Rain was really missing out by snoozing.

The state of Rain's neck and chest sends me into hysterical giggles every time. Phayu you did not have to go that hard with the marking bestie (let's be honest though, looking at the state of Phayu's neck post episode 6 they both have marking kinks) - everyone's gonna know Rain's officially yours soon enough. Also throwback to how like two months ago (or something like that idk the exact timeline) Rain was like hmph I never want anything to do with P' Phayu ever again. I didn't hear any complaining from you last night hmm??? Also I love how confident Rain was in his abilities to seduce Phayu, so true of him

I'm DECEASED

OK WAIT I think I finally get the whole yellow-blue thing. It literally is just that yellow is Rain's representative color and Phayu's is navy blue. So by making Rain put on Phayu's navy blue shirt for the "morning after" they're just reiterating that Rain belongs to Phayu now. Mystery solved :)

Obligatory shot bc he's worked hard for these gains and I think he deserves some appreciation ft. Rain who's making the same face as all of us. I think they spent like 30 whole seconds on Phayu's shoulders and that's so valid of them

Sir, do you have a good reason for striding in here shirtless and sweaty to wake your new bf up? Methinks someone was hoping for round 2

Ok, and we're back to Rain in a yellow t-shirt looking very feverish. He's holding his teal green phone (case) up though which is a combo of yellow and blue, isn't it? I'm sorry my color theory is lacking. His eyebrows look really nice here and I don't know why I noticed. I hope he has a good nap! But oops he misses calls from Phayu...

This episode's title is "the Calm Before the Storm" which implies it's gonna be a mostly tooth-rotting fluff episode and that drama is on the way next week. I'm already smiling so wide my cheeks hurt so the title is apt.

Phayu (dressed in navy blue!) is here to make sure his precious Rain is ok and Mama is already planning the wedding in her head.

The first three or four times I watched this, I was paying too much attention to their faces and probably missed a lot so let's break it down a bit. Phayu comes in, Rain's surprised and sits up, and Phayu sits down next to Rain on the bed but facing away. Phayu is slightly upset that Rain went away without saying anything and he was worried that since Rain was sick that him driving home alone was dangerous. The second Phayu sits down this way, Rain reaches out to grab his arm but Phayu pulls away. Compared to couples in other dramas, PhayuRain depend on touch a lot to communicate so obv the situation is quite serious plus Phayu is not immediately making eye contact with Rain.

The next couple of shots are just back and forth where Phayu asks why Rain left and Rain tells him what happened and apologies for worrying him. He looks v v soft and fluffy here

Gonna take a second to appreciate the background music bc it sounds so serious and doom-y right now but they're literally about to clear it all up so it was unnecessary to go that hard. Sound artist I love you

Throughout this conversation, Phayu starts far away (which for PhayuRain means there's like 1.5 meters of distance between their faces instead of 0.15 meters) but he moves closer and tilts his body more in Rain's direction as Rain gives each justification. He also lets Rain grab his arm. It's very subtle but I like the acting choices here.

Phayu, Rain is sick. Can you pls stop staring at his lips bff give him some rest (spoiler alert I counted like 5 lip-looks in the next 10 seconds, Phayu didn't hear me)

OK this hug. Exquisite. The gap has been bridged, all parties are happy again, and they both absolutely sink into each other.

Boss' little shoulder rub here is so soft and gives us more PhayuRain believability. We can see how worried he was and how relieved he is now that Rain is safely in his arms again.

Rain's cheek-smushed nod agreeing to never disappear from Phayu's side ever again is everything to me.

I don't actually think this was what I was supposed to get out of this but there's something about the symmetry of this hug and them being in the shape of a triangle and how technically their first encounter as a couple involved Phayu's triangle tool etc. etc. etc. Also headpat alert!

More subtle and soft gestures from Phayu. Rain is down bad.

HANDS!!!

We really heard the MWAH here and I want to forehead kiss whoever placed the mics

Everyone needs to observe Rain's expression right after Phayu asks this question bc it's very sus

(I couldn't get it in motion but Rain straightens up a bit and raises his eyebrows. Someone thinks they're about to get spanked like before)

Except this is not that kind of punishment and I can't believe Phayu really brought along a rectal suppository. To his credit though, I believe they're supposed to be more immediately effective than oral medicines because they absorb more directly into the body so he just wants Rain to be healthy faster. Although I wish Phayu would've not proceeded to yank Rain's pants off without permission, it's fiction and I hope if Rain had shown signs of major discomfort he would've listened. I do have to wonder if Mama put on headphones though bc Rain was really loud with his protests. I also think this must've been funny to film bc if you look closely before it cuts to Rain's mom, Rain looks like he's holding back laughter.

Uh-oh, Mama it's better if you walk away now

This sequence was actually so adorable and funny. I love purrito!Rain and Phayu is looking way too smug. Mama Rain walked out of there trying to name all the yellow and blue flowers she could for the wedding centerpieces.

omfg Phayu calling Rain's mom "Mama" is so friggin cute and I love how smoothly he just slid into son-in-law position

Rain's like excuse me I'm sick I should NOT be slandered right now

To part 2 with all the cute shots!!

[chrrywvea]

i think the most beautiful thing i experienced at the r+ concert in groningen was this:

they were playing ausländer right? i have watched many many maaany videos of the beautiful outro yet i wasn't one bit prepared to hear it live - safe to say i was tearing up instantly when richard started playing. sobbing. call me dramatic, but that moment was simply magical. so i'm in tears, somehow keeping my phone up despite my emotional breakdown bc that was one of the moments i desperately wanted to film and i look down our seat row for a moment; what do i see? another girl my age, also filming & sobbing hysterically like i was. we meet eyes and we both start giggling through it while we, of course, keep watching richard. when the solo ends we're both by far the loudest ones to cheer (it was definitely audible haha, some people looked at us all weird & stuff but honestly, their worries). we meet eyes again and have like, a whole fangirling conversation through wild gestures, silent talking and basically freaking out and dare i say after the concert itself that was the best experience of the day. we didn't even talk afterwards (i was so exhausted & my feet hurt so i just wanted to get to our car😅 if you see this girly i'm sorry) but i'll remember that always.

music connects strangers of all kinds through so many ways and it's delightful to witness it myself once more. on one more note kudos to the three elderly dudes in front of us who kept singing with me and hyped me up☆☆☆

that's it, much love to anyone who read all of this. i just wanted to share something positive :-) if y'all want keep the positivity chain going, i'd love to hear some of your experiences♡ i'm sure some of us are definitely needing it

thank you rammstein, for a night i'll never forget♡

[aubzikins]

Alaskan Darkness - Chapter 2 Writer's Collective Discord Shenanigans Pt1

We have many POVs for our lovely Rah's fic. I figured I would give yall an insight on the craziness of our little Collective. ENJOY! PSA... This is all fictional... mostly.. shenanigans

After talking to Rah about logistics of the KCONers getting up to Alaska, we got to work on prepping the houses in our neighborhood for incoming company. Nick and I were able to find some abandoned stores that had a ton of winter gear of all different sizes. We loaded up our two SUVs and determined to use the middle house of the neighborhood as a “processing” center. This allows everyone to come into the neighborhood, get a set of keys for a house, some food and pick up some winter gear.

Dealing with a zombie apocalypse where they seem to not like Alaska, is kind of boring. We are in a smaller town which means we don’t have to deal with a whole lot of people. This leaves me with some extra time on my hands. After getting everything prepped, we still had a couple days until the KCONers were due to arrive. I decided to get onto Discord and check in with everyone.

Writers Collective Discord – Chaotic-Main:

Aubz: Hey y’all!!!! God, the one good thing about being up here is that no one bothers me. Everyone doing okay down there?

Rah: Were good.

Rayne: Just hanging out…

Bella: All good here, getting to know everyone.

Aubz: Hey @Rayne, have you tried to “seduce the Jinnie” yet?

Rayne: I…

Rah: AUBZ!!!! WE INVITED THEM ALL TO THE SERVER!! THEY ARE IN HERE!!!

Aubz: Oh Shit!!!! *Deletes the previous message* SORRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Aubz: Um… So, @Rah @Bella, I am making a new role and a private channel. Also, please next time WARN me before we invite a bunch of idols into the server. Everything has been muted since we were out and about collecting supplies…

CaptainsEyepatch: wtf? I thought Rayne was into Woo??????

Aubz: o.o Um… Whatcha talking about? I’m Aubz Snow… I know nothing.

**creates a private channel and the role of WC Ogs**

Aubz: Ok, so when the FUCK did they all join???

Bella: *hysterically laughing* The Kids joined as soon as we got internet back, the pirates joined after the military announcement.

Rah: Yeah, figured everyone should be in the server so we could communicate better.

Aubz: Oh okay… WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT

Jennen: Theres the lightbulb…

Aubz: OOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG DOES THIS MEAN THEY HAVE BEEN ABLE TO READ EVERYTHING WE HAVE SENT????????????

Shai: Yeah… about that… I have already had to talk to Bin and Cap about it. That was a fun convo *rolls eyes*

Kel: They have seen all the pictures as well..

Aubz: *dies dramatically* oh fuck… All Channels?

Bella: Yeah

Aubz: and y’all have the pirates HEADING MY WAY?

Rah: *nods* Yes…

Aubz: omfg omfg omfg…. *finally meets Seongwha* “Hi im the middle aged married woman who has been thirsting and writing about yall for years… Welcome to my humble abode.”

Rah: *laughing* I love Aubz meltdowns!

Kel: me too

Aubz: Question…

Bella: possible answer?

Aubz: Do they by chance know about our personal servers?

Kel: I know they know about them but none of us have sent them any invites…

Aubz: Oh thank god…

Rayne: Also… no I have not seduced the Jinnie. Although he's trying to seduce me it seems... *winks*

Bella: I may or may not have told the demon Bunny about your server name.

Aubz: *Embarassed face* WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT???

Bella: Because you have been paying a monthly fee to call him Meow Meows everyday. Also he admits that he saw those messages AND all the messages that you had sent about DnD, fics etc

Rah: Basically, if it was put into this server... they know about it...

Aubz: Ok… so I am gonna start heading for the arctic circle, its been nice knowing y'all.

Rah: it gets better…

Aubz: WHAT DO YOU MEAN RAH?

Bella: *sends laughing Ezma Kitty gif*

Aubz: oh fuck…

Jennen: Just take this as payback for your years of shenanigans…

Kel: Its okay Aubz… its good…

Rah: I will send you a DM

Aubz: *sends a Chan hiding gif*

Rah: Check your DMs

Aubz: I am so fucked… figuratively…

Aubz: o…m…g… I am um gonna go hide now. Also just remember, I am gonna be able to tell the pirates ALLLLLLLL ABOUT YOU GUYS! So no telling the Kids ANYTHING

Rayne: I will just message Seongwha on the side and give him a list of all your side comments in your server… Like tagging Peach trying to get her to stan Ateez… the tongue pics

Shai: Remember we have access to your server too.

Aubz: oh god…

Shai: If I have to suffer, everyone is suffering…

Bella: Might wanna check the main chat guys..

Writers Collective Discord – Chaotic-Main:

CaptainsEyepatch: wtf? I thought Rayne was into Woo??????

Aubz: o.o Um… Whatcha talking about? I am Aubz Snow… I know nothing.

Rah: Don’t mind the Aubz, she’s been isolated for a while

WoosFoxEars: Cheating on me already Rayne?

CaptainsEyepatch: Wow, I thought I told you guys that you can only stan us?

BinniesCake&Biddies: Its not our fault that they found better? *winks*

WoosFoxEars: Better? I’ll remember that Binnie

ChickieYongbok: I think it’s cute!

Ferret&Flames: *sends a drama gif*

Rah: …

Bella: Now Now Guys…

ChrisHasRizzButCannotFlirt: …

SURPRISE!_ImLINO: Let them fight it out Bella… I need some entertainment…

MamaHwasTongueTamer: Where did Aubz go?

Jennen: She is hiding, she is our chaos starter…

OGMaknaeOnTop: That is an understatement from what I have read..

DobermanInTheDiscord!: oh @Aubz where are you… it shows you online!

Aubz: … New Discord, who this?

Bella: *facepalms*

Rah: *laughing*

Jennen: Didn’t you rant about FicJinnie setting you on fire in the fic @Rayne???

Rayne: … I hate you…

Aubz: um… did yall seriously use the fic Discord usernames?

Bella: They did it so we knew who they were.

Aubz: I feel like I was set up… *nervous laugh* Don’t mind me as I go and delete ALL previous messages and start walking towards the arctic circle like ive been exiled.

MamaHwasTongueTamer: @Aubz don’t do that! I am on my way up to you, Tongue and all *winks*

Aubz: Rayne… Please see other chat…

Rayne: Nope say it here Aubz

Aubz: Rayne… Not in front of guests.

Bella: *insert popcorn gif*

SURPRISE!_ImLINO: Bella share the popcorn, this is getting good.

Rayne: Aubz… I DARE you to say it in here…

Aubz: FINE… IM GOING TO STRANGLE YOU THE MOMENT I FUCKING SEE YOU RAYNE!!!!!!!

TheFaeKingsCrown: @Aubz No strangling the Rayne…

MamaHwasTongueTamer: @Aubz calm down…

Jennen: Bold of y’all to assume Rayne would not enjoy Aubz strangling them…

Aubz: *facepalms* and I just swore in front of them. *cries* I am gonna go die now.

Rah: Not allowed Aubz

Aubz: On that note… I am gonna go finish prepping for the KCONers arrivals. If y’all need me, tag me *kisses* *inserts Homer Simpson disappearing gif*

MamaHwasTongueTamer: See you soon Aubz *winks*

Writers Collective Discord – Chaotic-Main:

Aubz: btw I hate y’all and fuck my life…

Rah: Nope! You love us!!!

[honey-tea-and-cookies]

Messages For These Placements <3

Aquarius Sun/Mercury: Y'all always gotta be the smartest in the room huh? Don't argue, we both know it. Even if you're defensive smh 🙄. Now this isn't to say you're wrong. You absolutely are smart. But you're more than that, you know? I know people have made your intelligence a huge part of your identity (gifted kid burnout anyone??) but you are actually way more than that. You don't need to know everything to be of value. You matter beyond your intelligence and learning capability. Side note: You are so funny and it's such a shame people don't realise it more. Like, astrology people do, but regular people in your regular life don't see you as funny. That's bullshit tbh y'all are hysterical.

Taurus Moon: Stop dealing with your emotions through baking. Banana bread is temporary. The problem will stay. Fix the issue at it's root. Come on now. You're amazing at giving advice, for once please use your own wisdom. Also, I know this is a huge realisation but; not everyone has the same love language as you. By that I mean, it's not that they don't care about you. It's not that they don't put as much effort in as you do. It's that you just express your affections differently. You give advice, you cook for people, you help them with clothes and general design choices, you help them with work, etc. That's great! But they might not do that for you, and it doesn't mean they don't love you. It just means they might show it as texting you a meme that reminded them of you, inviting you to play video games, re-watching an episode so you can catch up, letting you pick the music, checking on you after you fall asleep, etc. You know?? Important lesson you guys. Finally, PUT UP BOUNDARIES. I'm begging. I know you want to be selfless and I know you try to be kind and I know you struggle to do things you know will upset others in some way. Your happiness/safety/comfort/wellbeing is more important though. I know you get told by astrologers that Taurus is 'selfish' or 'egotistical', and they can be, but in this place especially I think it makes some really kind and gentle people. Y'all are also bad bitches but that's not the point here. The point is, set boundaries. Thank you :)

Capricorn Venus: No because why do does Cap Venus make life so hard it's not fair 😭. You want to be open and vulnerable and loved by your person so bad, I know, it's just really hard. It's just... uncomfortable, you know? I know vulnerability is a struggle for everyone, but it's truly paralysing for Cap Venus natives. Stuck in a limbo between the carnal yet truly deep desire for romantic, domestic bliss and desperately wishing for their heart remain untouched, and therefore unharmed. Life is hard and our minds are cruel, my love. I know. You'll get there honey :)

Mars in 1st House: RBF. Everyone thinks you're a bitch. That's my whole comment. Oh, and that literally every person knows what you're thinking. You are NOT slick, sorry babes. Love you though????

Lilith in 4th House: This isn't a callout this is a cry for help. Please get therapy you guys. Or a hug. Or cut off some family members. Please treat yourself today. TW: Death, sexual harassment, mental illness, emotional manipulation, implication of suicide, familial trauma. Y'all are always like "I've had a blessed life, I'm so grateful for what I have" and you've lost a major family member, been sexually harassed by your uncle, had to talk down your own parent and had a whole mental illness be blamed on you 🤨. TW: Over. Baby take a breather. This was not an attack on you, I just can't handle getting too serious right now lol. Please though, seriously, give me a fucking hug. We both need a snuggle okay? Or if you're uncomfortable with touch, we can sit on the same couch and enjoy each other's general comforting presence. Let's make a pact to heal, okay? I love you <3

Jupiter in 7th House: Fake scenarios much? Pull yourself together sweetheart. We both know you're at least a little scared of love. Yet, it's one of your greatest dreams?? You won't meet anyone by day dreaming, ya know. If you genuinely aren't ready yet, that's okay! However, if the first one is you. If you are the person who desperately wants a relationship but is too busy day dreaming to do anything about it... I don't know what to tell you cutie pie. Good luck?? 💀

Okay everyone, that's all I have for today! Thank you so much for reading. If you have any of these placements, let me know! Tell me if you relate or not lol please relate to me I CANNOT be the only bitch like this right??? I love you guys so much, and have an amazing day/night!!

[writtengalaxies]

A Confession At Knife-point

Cup God Chronicles :: Part 4

Characters: God of Night, GN!Reader

Word Count: 730

Spicy Rating: Our dear reader has a foul mouth, so expect a lot of f-bombs y'all!

You stare across the table at him.

The God of Night has his hands folded in front of him, trying to keep his eyes anywhere but on the glow-in-the-dark plastic cup you're sipping juice from, the book open to that last ritual, and your face. Finally, you sigh, putting the cup down, folding your hands in front of your face. Sure, you feel a bit like an anime villain, but...the man made you a promise.

"I didn't die. So start talking. What's so ooky-spooky about this ritual that makes you so skittish?"

"How much do you understand of what's written here?"

You shrug, pointing out the sections. "This basically reads like it's a spell for a messy break up, but I can't read most of the page."

He sighs, honest to gods (ha) sighs, like a melodramatic teenager. "It's...more complicated than that."

"Explain it to me, then."

"I...I would rather not-"

"You made a deal, dude. What's in the damn book."

"...I don't have many followers. You're...you're honestly my only one any more, even by technicality. I exist because I am Night, and--"

"I don't care about your tragic backstory right now. Why's this spell freaking you out so bad. Just means I get my privacy back, right?

"It..." He sighs again, and you resist the urge to roll your eyes. "It...it isn't just severing the connection between us. It...it takes from you."

"Like, what? I'll get dizzy, or--"

"Emotionally. It cuts out part of your emotional range as payment. It's not meant to make it...easy. You lose part of yourself. Based on what I've seen in the past, your particular witticisms, your sarcasm, your....you-ness...You might be a strange, weird little mortal, but you're my strange, weird little mortal--" He takes a breath, his hand covering the part of his face you can see, like he's embarrassed about saying that. "If you truly want me gone, I'll...I'll find a different way to sever our connection, I swear. I promise. But just...I..." He swallows, a motion you're not really certain he needs to do, before he speaks again. "I...I'm fond of you, in a way I haven't been in a very long time...and...I would be...put out if you lost your...spark, starlight." 

You blink. He's never called you anything but 'mortal' before. Not your name, and certainly not what could best be described as a pet name.

You sigh, shoving to your feet to go process things, get a slice of cake. You bought it as a treat to yourself, and by fucking god, did you need it now. The last thought, that last word really lingered, however, and you turned, brandishing the knife as you started talking.

"Wait a fucking second. Why did you call me starlight? What kind of--Are you blushing?" The god shifted to turn away from you, leaving you to follow him around the table, trying to catch his attention. "You are! Why are you--oh my fuck. Do you have a crush on me?" He continued to look away, leaving you laughing almost hysterically as you headed back to the cake, gesturing as you spoke. "This is how I find out. Fucking figures! First time someone does in forever, and it's a god with a problem with personal space--"

"Please, starlight, can we talk about this--will you please put the knife down before I actually tell you--" He squawked, staring at you, then over his shoulder, where the the object you just threw rolled to a stop. "Did you just throw a cup at my head?!"

"I dunno, did you just decide to call me sweet things like we're already lovers?"

"...Fair point, but...perhaps...perhaps I am fond of you in that way as well. I just...you're interesting in many ways, and everything I learn about you I carry with me through each night..."

You stare at him for a long time, then sigh. "Do it properly."

"...Sorry, what?"

"If you're going to try to flirt with me, do it properly. Woo me, motherfucker. Flowers. Dates...I don't know if gods do dates, but I'm not just gonna say 'oh boy! Time for deific dalliances!', you gotta work for this."

"...You're...not opposed. To..."

"We'll see. I'm not a cheap date."

You give him a smirk, not unlike the ones he's used to giving you.

It's worth it to see the small, truly happy smile come to life on his face.

[batsandbugs]

The Great IKEA Game

Chapter 11: Playing the Game

AN: I hope y'all enjoy this non-stop flirt-a-thon, chapter count got increased again, so we'll get back to the plot in the next chapter!

At first, Marinette didn’t know how to act. This was the last route she expected Damian to take. The shock of Damian’s lips against hers turned her body rigid; hands splayed out to the sides, unsure of where to touch. After a second of floundering, she gained enough bearing to place her hands firmly on Damian’s arms. Her once still lips hesitantly moving against his. The closed-mouth kiss stayed chaste, but Marinette found herself fluttering her eyes closed, sinking into the warmth.

Damian stood taller than her, bending into the kiss while she craned her neck. Marinette pushed herself upward, arching onto the tips of her toes, and Damian’s hands wrapped tighter around her waist, deepening the kiss. She readjusted her mouth for a second grabbing a quick gasp of air before diving in again with more fervor. Damian responded in kind, pushing her back fully against the wall, one hand migrating from her waist to cup her cheek.

Damn. Damian was a good kisser.

“What the- Hey, customers are not allowed to be in here!”

Oh, right. The employee. That’s why they were kissing.

Why would kissing be helpful in this situation?

Not that Marinette was complaining, but-

Damian pulled away from her, and Marinette held back a pitiful whine when he turned away and faced the employee.

‘Bad thoughts, Marinette,’ she chided herself. ‘Focus on the mission, not Damian, or his lips, or his eyes, or-’

“Oh, sorry ‘bout that,” said Damian with a bashful smile.

Wait…

Blink.

What?

Marinette dragged herself out of the kiss-induced bliss, focusing on her co-conspirator, and had she been less in control of herself her jaw would have dropped.

Damian’s whole demeanor had markedly changed. His normal sharp posture sunk into a causal slouch; the emotions on his face, generally a mix of sharp observation or practiced disdain, now a mix of charming elegance and, yes, bashfulness. He flashed a wide grin at the oncoming employee, a person in their early twenties, who froze when they saw them.

Or rather, Damian.

Rapidly blinking bright blue eyes gazed at them. “Oh, oh you- you’re-”

“Yeah, yeah, we all know who I am,” said Damian, rubbing the back of his neck. Even the way he spoke changed; careful pronunciation and formality thrown out the window for a lax New Jersian drawl. “What’s your name?” He asked with such a genuine smile, had Marinette not been versed in people lying through their teeth, she would have bought it.

Not for the first time, Marinette wondered how famous Damian’s family was – obviously rich enough, and high profile enough - to be recognized on the spot.

The person paused for a moment, fiddling with a strand of curly blond hair. “I’m- I’m ah… Fey, nice to meet you Mr.-”

Damian cut them off with a laugh. “Oh please, any name with a mister makes me think of my father or my older brother. Call me Dami.” He offered a hand to the flustered Fey. They limply shook it.

“Oh… ah- alright Dami.”

Damian encircled a hand around Marinette’s waist dragging her out of the weirdness induced fugue state she’d fallen into. “And this… well,” he lowered his eyes, catching her attention and winked. “This is my girlfriend Marinette.”

Fuck, this is what he meant by play along.

Fey dropped open their mouth before closing it quickly.

“Oh, I hadn’t read-”

Damian cut the flustered employee off again.

“We’ve kept it quiet.” He waved his hand dismissively. “The papers would devour a story like this,” he said, with a sense of vapid annoyance, although a trace of his normal calculated disdain accented his words.

Note to self; Damian didn’t like the media. Good, Marinette didn’t much like the invasive vultures either.

Fey nodded along, twirling a lock of hair on their finger. “Oh yeah, that totally makes sense.” They paused shaking their head to clear away an emotion… awe? Fear? Marinette couldn’t tell. “But uh, why are you here? Like in the stairwell, not in the store. Because of course celebrities would still shop, right? I mean-” Poor Fey was a stuttering mess. Marinette almost felt bad for them.

She felt like an absolute stuttering mess too, but she would be damned if Damian would carry this lie all by himself.

She was fucking Ladybug; savior of Paris, Guardian of the Miraculous.

She could act like a lovestruck fool.

“It iz so sweet,” she said, emphasizing her accent to add a little more pageantry to this entire scheme. “I just arrived back from Paris, and wanted to decorate my new apartment with ze ah-” she waved her hands around, “Oh, how you Americans put it? Fairy lights?”

Fey nodded quickly. “Yeah, we have a couple of good selections, but-” Marinette continued before they could logic their way out of the made-up cover story.

“I planned to go by myself, but Dami-” at this she moved forward to wrap her arms around his, leaning into his side. The warmth of his body bleeding through his clothes. “He insisted on ‘companying me even though he dozen’t like ze crowds.” She leaned forward with a conspiratorial air. “He gets grumpy,” she divulged with a girlish giggle. Why Damian did a 180 on his personality was a complete mystery, but if he dropped the act, this would make Fey less suspicious.

Fey nodded right along like Marinette’s comment made total sense. “Yeah, I don’t read too many magazines, but damn they must pin you all wrong,” they said to Damian. From Marinette’s position at his side, she felt his body tense the slightest amount. “Gotham’s Ice Prince, yeah right.”

Marinette inwardly quirked an eyebrow. ‘Ice Prince, huh?’ The name sounded familiar, but she couldn’t put her finger on where she’d heard it before.

Damian nervously chuckled again, sounding more authentic this time. “Oh no, I’m a grump when it comes to the media, I fully admit. My, ah,” he looked at her again, an apology flashing in his green eyes. “Angel here puts me in a better mood.”

A rushing noise filled Marinette’s ears, and her heart quickened. She vaguely registered a squeal of delight coming from Fey, but it sounded far away compared to her blood pounding at a thunderous level. Heat flushed in her cheeks, and the confident smile she plastered on her face almost dropped at the pet name.

Angel.

He called her angel.

What level of utter insanity had she dropped into?

“A few disguises later,” Damian continued, adjusting the glasses on his face, and oblivious of the turmoil he’d created in Marinette’s mind. “I thought we’d be able to stay under the radar, I just wanted a day out with my girlfriend,” he said with a put-upon sigh. The emotional, charming actions stood in complete opposite to Damian’s normal demeanor.

Marinette found herself desperately torn between breaking down laughing hysterically or clapping at Damian’s masterful performance.

“You got noticed?” asked Fey.

“We got noticed.” Damian sighed, rubbing a hand through his hair. Marinette regretted not touching it while she and Damian kissed; was it as fluffy as it looked? “And Marinette, the sweet angel she is, isn’t used to the whole utter insanity of… you know, dating a celebrity.” He glanced at her, teasing her with a fonder smirk than his usual. Marinette wanted to roll her eyes. Damian had no clue she knew very well the consequences of dating a celebrity.

Never mind she’d only dated Adrian a month before they broke up because his dad turned out to be a psychopathic supervillain intent on plunging the whole of France into an apocalyptic hellscape in an attempt to upset the universes’ balance, and was fully okay with killing the both of them to make it happen.

Being friends after that little debacle was the better option. For both their sanities.

‘Focus Marinette.’ She dragged her attention back to the conversation.

“We kinda ducked in here when nobody was paying attention. I want to keep this away from the media as long as possible, for my angel’s privacy.” Marinette wanted to scoff at how Damian leaned into that nickname. He certainly was laying it on thick. Marinette wouldn’t have bought the act, but that was due to her years of lying and deceiving in the name of super-heroics.

Fey, with their eager demeanor and bright blue eyes, didn’t stand a chance.

“Oh, that’s awful people wouldn’t leave you alone. I bet most celebrities would be familiar with the attention, but for you to look out for Marinette too?” They whistled. “Damn girl, he’s a keeper for sure.”

The blush gracing Marinette’s cheeks was 100% real. “Oh, well, ah, zank you. I know.”

“Well, no one will hear a word from me,” Fey promised. They fiddled with their hands and sent a shy smile at Damian. Marinette’s stomach clenched at the sight, and without her permission, her traitorous hands tightened their grip on Damian’s arm. “Without your family’s scholarship, my sister never would have graduated med school. She would kill me if I even thought of ratting you out to the papers.”

“Oh…” said Damian, his outward appearance of shock mirroring Marinette’s own internal emotions.

‘His family is rich enough to fund medical scholarships?’

“Well, that’s not on me directly, you know,” he commented. “All my father’s doing. I hope- ah… I hope she’s doing well?” Although his face portrayed a bashful and relaxed air, his body language screamed uncomfortableness. Marinette released one hand from his arm and brought it to rest on the small of his back, circling her thumb around. He relaxed, slightly, and Marinette smiled.

“Yeah, actually she is,” said Fey beaming. “She’s working at the new pediatric clinic that opened in Crime Alley.”

“Good for her,” said Damian honestly. “We need more people willing to work to make the city a better place. Money can only do so much.”

“Money definitely helps though,” Fey replied, wryly. Marinette agreed. Long-buried memories of her early years arose. Living above her parents’ shop, where every month they spread their bills across the kitchen table and talked in hushed tones while Marinette sat on the steps to her attic room and worried, even if at five and six she didn’t know what she was worried about.

Those days were long gone. Her parents and their creations internationally famous, with three separate locations across the greater Paris metro alone. But that worry never really went away.

Fey shifted on their feet reading their watch. “Well, you guys stay here if you want until whatever crowd out there loses interest.” They gestured to the door Marinette and Damian entered through. “Or you can come with me if you want?” Pointing to the other locked door. “I’m heading out to the atrium to deal with a problem, but you can continue on with your shopping.”

“Zank you so much,” Marinette replied. “We will go with you if you do not mind?”

“Of course not,” said Fey, walking to the door and pulling out a security key. They opened the door, but Damian held it allowing Marinette and Fey to walk through before he followed. Placing a hand once more around Marinette’s waist.

“What problem in the atrium, if you don’t mind me asking?” he prodded, sharing a look with Marinette.

It could be nothing, but it could also have something to do with his brothers.

Considering their luck today, Marinette would be shocked if it wasn’t the latter option.

“Oh, well it started with the children’s center shutting down. Apparently, the kids got it in their minds to start a dodge ball fight with the workers. Which, you know, totally fair,” confided Fey, as they walked through the back corridors. “Sounded like it was a blast to watch. I was such a shit when I was a kid, I would have joined them in a heartbeat. It wrapped up fairly quickly, but they can’t convince the main instigator to descend from the jungle gym. I think they’re still hunting down her parents.”

Marinette pursed her lips trying to hold back a smile. ‘Oh, Abby,’ she thought, ‘you absolute gem.’

“I only heard about it from Lisa when I got back because I was dealing with a security issue in the back lot.” Fey glanced at them nervously. “Not that there’s anything wrong, we’re perfectly safe.”

Marinette and Damian shared a look.

Jason.

“Of course,” said Marinette.

Followed by a quick, “Absolutely,” from Damian.

Fey relaxed. “So this is, apparently, a whole bunch of workers on strike? They walked out of the back warehouse and congregated in the atrium, spouting on about living wages and corrupt big business, and the effects of verbal abuse in the workplace.” Fey said with a wave of their arms. “And it’s not like I don’t agree, because I do. Jerry, the warehouse general manager, is an asshole.” Marinette and Damian exchange worried glances at the rotund angry man’s name, who they last saw dragging a singed Tim into an office.

“…but it makes my job hard,” whined Fey, oblivious to their compatriot’s inner panic. “And the Starbucks baristas joined them, so their kiosk closed too.” Fey chuckled, “I would avoid the whole area if I were you, especially if you don’t want anyone finding out you’re together.”

“I wonder how zat ended up happening?” Marinette asked hopefully her high-pitched voice conveyed confusion instead of slowly settling in panic.

“They called in saying some guy lead the charge, he’s worked the crowd into a fervor. I’m there to be the HR rep while security tries to remove him. You know, normally my job involves sitting at a desk all day listening to bitchy customers on the phone. I’ve dealt with more in-store problems today since last Black Friday.” Fey chuckled. “What a day, ya’ know?”

Marinette glanced at Damian, his casual mask still firmly in place, although his left eye twitched, and the hand he wrapped around her waist, tightened at Fey’s words.

Fey finally reached another door, pulling out their pass and lead them out into the store’s main section.

“Well, it was nice to meet you Marinette, Dami,” Fey chirped. “Nobody will hear from me about any of this.” They mimed zipping their lips.

Marinette smiled, hoping the strain wasn’t too noticeable. “It waz nice to meet you too Fey.”

“Good luck with whatever is happening in the atrium,” said Damian. They stood at the door and watched them move out of sight. When Fey finally disappeared around a corner, Damian turned to Marinette his casual persona rippling away as if it never existed at all. His hand slipped off her waist.

She did not, absolutely not, want to grab it and put it back thank you very much.

“How much do you wish to wager on Drake’s involvement in whatever is occurring in the atrium?” he asked. Marinette smiled, reassured at the return of his clipped and formal tone. The informal speech felt wrong coming from Damian’s mouth.

“Oh, I don’t know Dami?” she teased. Then again, she couldn’t let this opportunity pass by her. “I don’t think I have enough money for that bet with you.”

Damian closed his eyes with a grimace and sigh. “Do not call me that.” He opened his eyes, an expression just short of pleading radiated from them “Please.”

“I would rather gag, and it sounds so would you.” Marinette covered her grin with her hand, unable to stop a slight giggle at the man’s long-suffering tone. “You pulled off vapid lovesick celebrity well, but why the need to act at all?”

“I have plenty of reference to draw from,” he grumbled, piquing Marinette’s interest; every half aside comment enticing her to dig further at Damian’s life. “I needed whoever descended those steps on our side and my normal... demeanor tends to put people off.” He folded his hands behind his back, a perfect picture of casualness, but the tightness around his eyes and the twitch of his mouth was all Marinette needed to note his self-consciousness.

“Well, I for one find your usual self charming,” Marinette admitted, pleased when Damian relaxed at her words. “You freaked me out acting that weird.”

“It is not an option I use often,” Damian admitted. “My brothers tend to make big productions of themselves. I prefer a far subtler approach, but this required more theatrics to make it believable.” He glanced at her. “I hope…” he paused. She watched his hand flutter and turn into a fist at his side. “I hope I did not overstep your bounds, that is, I mean violate your...” Damian refused to look at her, his gaze firmly planted on a far wall.

Marinette could let the poor man continue but ended up taking pity on him before he dug an even deeper hole. She placed a hand on his arm. “You were fine. If I didn’t want you… kissing me,” she said the words out loud for the first time, reigning in a pleasurable shudder at the memory. “I would have pushed you off, and if I felt violated, which I didn’t, you would have found yourself on the ground in plenty of pain.”

Damian dragged his gaze back to hers, a small smirk twitching at the corner of his lips. “Undoubtedly, yes, you easily could have done so.”

Marinette smirked again, not willing to let the entire debacle slip away quite yet though. “Although I have to ask, where in the world did angel come from? And what on earth made you think it would be a good nickname for our fake relationship?”

Damian lifted his nose haughtily. “It is a perfectly acceptable name of affection for a significant other. What, did you wish for ‘sweetheart’ or ‘doll’?” he asked, drawing out those names with the earlier casual New Jersian accent. Marinette withheld a shiver at his low tone of voice curling those words around his tongue. She may prefer his normal speech, but damn he still sounded unbearably attractive when he dropped that low.

‘Focus, Marinette. FOCUS!’ she inwardly screamed at herself.

“Goodness no,” said Marinette, forcing a pretend shudder. “Something with more class perhaps? Darling, or beloved?”

Damian pursed his lips. “Not beloved. That’s what my mother refers to my father with.” Marinette winced, yeah, that could be awkward. Not that this whole conversation wasn’t a disaster plucked out of a fever dream. Why, why was she debating Damian on the finer points of affectionate nickname giving?

But her mouth continued talking. “Alright, I suppose angel isn’t bad in comparison. Still, it’s a bit cliché. What does that make you? A demon?”

Damian tilted his head with a shrug. “Tt. My brothers do call me that on occasion, yes.” Oh right, Jason called him demon-spawn a few times during their confrontation. With the way Damian rolled his eyes in annoyance, Marinette figured a story lurked behind that particular nickname.

“Regardless, we have strayed dangerously off-topic here. We should head towards the pandemonium in the atrium, yes?” Damian pushed off the wall he’d leaned against, and Marinette followed.

“I thought it was Panic at the Disco?” Marinette teased with a grin.

Damian pointed a finger at her, trying for a stern expression, but the glint in his eyes betrayed his amusement. “You think yourself terribly clever, don’t you?”

“I think I’m adorable,” she shot back. “But I also think you’re right. It sounds like Tim managed to involve himself. If he’s making a scene, I bet he’ll draw the rest of your brothers there too.”

“You think Grayson will escape the clutches of that ravenous she-wolf?”

Marinette scoffed. “Damian, you’ll insult wolves with that comparison. I thought she resembled more of a hyena myself.” The woman certainly shrieked enough for it. “From what I saw, your brother probably ducked out at the first opportunity available to him.”

“True. Which leaves Todd, and nothing attracts his attention more than a spectacle. Especially when Drake stands chance to make a fool of himself.” Turning a corner they found themselves several yards away from the open-aired atrium. A crowd of people lingered around the railing looking into the courtyard below. Clapping and cheers fill the air.

“Shall we?” asked Marinette, excitement brewing in her chest.

“I have a bad feeling about this,” grumbled Damian. “But I suppose we must.”

Tag List (or you can subscribe and read it here on ao3)

@multplelifes @bluesimani @justhugefangirl @nik-nak-3 @redscarlet95 @purplesundaze @incredulous-reader @k-poplunardreams @our-preciousss @blackmagicforever @vgirl-10123 @lozzybowe @wannajointhecrabcult @dast218 @chaotic-mess-of-a-life @fidget-eep @kawaiigiantjudgefish @queenmj10 @tumbling-down-hills-and-stuff @crazylittlemunchkin @fandom-writer642 @nach0ava @ladybug-182 @sam-i-am-0222 @spyofthenightcourt @how-to-fuction-properly @emotionalsupportginger @dreamykitty25 @tomanyfandomsonmy-mind @mystery-5-5 @theatreandcomicfreak @weird-pale-blonde-person @whatthechickenfriedfuck @myazael @pawsitivelymiraculous @urbanpineapplefarmer @karategirl119 @consumeconstantly @hauntedstudent99 @ertyzeta @thornalchemist23 @iloveitwhen @animegirlweeb @byronsacademics @i-wanna-be-a-ninja @moonlitjiminie @iglowinggemma28 @constancetruggle @catgirlkittypryde @waffelyunsure @maskedpainter @lilkymilky @unhappyraspberry @avengerthewarrior @quotesandanime @tbehartoo @clumsy-owl-4178 @g-arya @chocolateherringtacofan @jalaluvsu @crazyrandomrebel @fatimaabbasrizvi @thenillabean @goblinwhoships @bluefyoto94 @nerinalith @loopingtangent @demonicbusiness @hecate-hallow @themcclan @tropestropestropes @paintedhope7 @whitetiger1249 @glitchon @vulpixmina @kitkat81804 @kissa-chan @beautiful-disasters-sunshine @sh31bin0 @ichigorose @strawberry-lemonade @loveswifi​ @theunquiet-dead @dood-space​ @kitkat81804​ @queencommonsense​ @vgirl-10123​ @ihavehomeworkbutistillhere​ @karukofox21

[hurting-fictional-people]

Betrayal Story - Part 6

Hii look at what I finally finished! sorry for taking so long to post this guys, I don't even have an explanation lol... I have something else already half written for the boys so hopefully I won't take so long to update the story again 🙃 anyways, I hope y'all like it <3

tagging @thelazywitchphotographer @swift-perseides @whump-it-like-its-hot @sunflower1000 @msrandonstuff @fromtheo-withlove @boxofsilence @lionhxartx @sometouchofmadness @paleassprince @livingforthewhump @1becky1 @shameful-indulgence @whatwhumpcomments @tropes-for-my-md-daydreams @starnight-whump @writingbackwards @noodlesandkareokee @mylifeisonthebookshelf @nightwhumpee

CW: forced sedation, manhandling, drugged whumpee, needle mention, aftermath of branding/burning

Part 1 here, continued from here

-

Liam can’t move. Every time he does, his arms do too and the mere brush of burned skin against pristine bandages is enough to get him on the verge of tears.

The room he’s kept in is too barren, too small to provide any kind of distraction from the constant pulse of pain – too much and never abating. No one listens or cares when he begs for medication, for anything to ease the agony. The doctor comes in to see him, give him antibiotics and check if there’s no infection, but barely looks at Liam when he whimpers under gloved hands.

The first time he takes a glance at the twisted skin underneath the wound dressing, a breathy, hysterical laugh slips out, quickly followed by a silent gasp as Chase’s initials weigh on his arms. He was always his, in the end, wasn’t he? Even after being betrayed and stabbed and kidnapped, he could never get the agent off his mind. Now he’ll be on Liam’s body as well.

It takes all of his willpower not to rip the dressings off once the doctor and nurses leave, just to stare at the hideous thing his arms are now.

But in the silent room, with nothing to do but think and despair, Liam can’t stop looking at the bandages.

He doesn’t know how long he spends staring at it – at the white itchy gauze, and the burns that hurt underneath it. At the C and the R he knows are forever burned on his skin. Like fucking cattle, marked with his owner’s name. Like the stupid boy who thought he could give his heart away to the beautiful, mysterious man that smiled at him. If nothing else, it is a good reminder of how big of a fool Liam is. If he lives long enough for it to be useful, that is. If Jonah doesn’t decide he’s had enough of Liam soon.

Horror floods him at the thought, and when his heart speeds up, Liam can’t hold it any longer. He pulls off the bandages in one swift movement, holding his breath when a wave of fire licks his arms. It doesn’t stop him from ripping out the second bandage though.

His hands tremble on his lap as Liam stares at the skin above his wrists, red with blood and raw skin disfigured into letters. It looks just as ugly as it feels.

He doesn’t realize he’s crying until a tear drips on his thigh. And then another and one more, until he’s openly sobbing, chest heaving and stomach twisting.

Lost in tears and the sight of burned skin that sinks into his heart and burns everything there too, Liam only realizes there are people in the room when a hand grabs his forearm.

“What did you do? I just bandaged that,” the nurse complains.

This time, this one time, he moves. Liam yanks his arm away from their grasp and stumbles out of the bed, away from the nurse that stares at him with wide eyes and a startled frown.

“D-d-don’t touch me,” he hisses, holding his hands as close to his chest as he can, and hissing again when sore skin rubs against his shirt. “Stay the fuck away!”

But instead of moving back or so much as talking to him, the nurse calls for the guards and starts walking in his direction.

Liam takes a step backward and presses his back against the wall, wild eyes searching for an escape, a weapon, anything, but salvation is nowhere near. “Please, don’t. Leave me alone.”

When the guards open the door and enter the room, Liam slides to the ground, as small as he can make himself, elbows on his knees, arms protecting his head.

“Get off!” he screams when hands grab at him, and thrashes in the hold. His foot connects with soft flesh, his knee with someone’s chin, but there are too many men. Too many hands for too little strength, no matter how desperately Liam fights.

They drag him through the floor as Liam writhes with every last bit of stamina he has, panic driving him to fight like he wishes he could every time he’s hurt.

A different kind of pain blooms as he squirms uselessly in unforgiving grips – one deeper, familiar, warmer. Liam still doesn’t stop.

“Fuck, he reopened the stab wound,” someone shouts over the cacophony of pain and panicked struggling. “Hold him down, now!”

Liam is pushed to the floor, and when someone squeezes both his arms to keep him there, right over the exposed burns, the world turns red, and a scream tears its way out of his throat.

“No, no, no, get off!” he sobs, kicking out even when a needle sinks into his arm. “n-n-nggh off, get, get o-off,” he tries again, but the world is already slipping through his fingers. He kicks out and thrashes as best as he can, but it isn’t enough. There are stronger bodies over him and the movement is barely there at all.

As much as Liam tries to keep his eyes open, they weigh too heavy, the drugs stronger than he is.

What isn’t?

Liam’s body relaxes against his will, slumps under harsh hands and angry stares, and all he can do is whimper when they drag his limp body to the bed.

-

Chase moves through life like a ghost, only a shell of helplessness and worry, and for the first time, his team notices. He hasn’t slept in days, not with Liam’s face twisted in agony ready to wake him up each time he closes his eyes. Has barely eaten, no appetite left when all he can think about is the boy he loves being hurt on his account.

How can he be free when Liam is locked up? How can he be the one who isn’t hurting when he is the only one who ever deserved it?

“Come on, I know that there’s something wrong,” Zoey says, crossing her arms.

If he could simply flee, he would, but with the hacker standing right in front of him, Chase knows it isn’t worth it. Even if he did leave, she wouldn’t stop trying to get the truth out of him. So Chase sighs and looks down at the blond woman who looks ready to commit murder.

“We all know it. You look like shit. What’s going on?”

It takes all of his strength to plaster a smirk on his lips and lean against the wall with a casual tilt of his head. “You guys worry too much. I’m fine, Zo. Probably could do with a little more sleep, but who couldn’t?”

As convincing as he hopes he sounds, Zoey doesn’t seem at all impressed by his acting. If anything, her frown deepens. “I know you, Chase. And you know me, so you know you can trust me. You look even worse than you did after that mission with the newspaper boy.”

Newspaper boy. If that was all Liam meant for him, maybe Chase’s heart wouldn’t be this tattered.

“Zoey. I am okay, I p– I promise.”

I never lied to you, he had said to Liam as he bled out in Chase’s arms. I betrayed you, yes, but not once did I lie. Stay alive and I’ll prove it to you.

But that was just another lie, wasn’t it? Liam is as alive as ever, and all Chase’s done is cause him more pain than any of them ever imagined possible. All he’s proven is his failure to keep Liam safe.

What is another lie when he’s already filled with them? Maybe that’s all he was always meant to be, all he will ever be – a betrayer. A traitor. A liar.

With a casual shrug that makes his stomach twist, Chase sidesteps his teammate. Before he can move farther away though, she grabs his arm and pulls him back.

“You are good at lying, but I can see the way your eyes have gone dull. I’m not going to force you to say it, but when you get tired of pretending to be fine, I’ll be here. Okay?” When Chase doesn’t answer, she takes a deep breath and nods. Zoey leaves him standing there, feeling dirty and raw, something stirring inside his chest and begging him to tell her everything.

Chase opens his mouth, the truth one breath away, and takes a step towards Zoey’s back. And then his phone buzzes, and reality comes crashing back as he looks at the screen and she disappears down the corridor.

Wanna see him?

It’s the first message he’s gotten from Jonah in days, and Chase holds his breath and freezes for a second at the words.

He’s rushing to his car even before his mind has caught up with his legs.

He’s standing in front of Jonah’s building in a matter of minutes, heart racing but mind weirdly quiet. Static silence, fear building up.

Jonah waits for him in the lobby this time, leaning against the open door of the elevator with a smile on his lips.

“Chase! Long time no see.”

“Where is he?”

“Straight to the point, huh. Boring as ever,” Jonah rolls his eyes. “I was feeling generous today, thought you might want to say hello. I’m not sure our dear boy will answer you, but you can try for yourself I guess.”

“What the fuck did you do?” Chase hisses as Jonah nods for him to get inside and presses the button.

“Nothing bad. He was just fussing about the pain, so my nurses gave him have a little something to relax.”

Chase steps into the elevator, two guards close behind, and fears he’ll shatter his jaw from how hard he’s clenching it.

“He also doesn’t really like his new… adornments, I don’t think. Ripped the bandages earlier today, wet the whole bed with tears.”

Jonah’s voice is light as he says it, the tone one would use to talk about something meaningless, something that doesn’t make Chase sink his nails into his palms and hold his breath. The man’s eyes are the telltale, shining with dark glee, and Chase can see the way Jonah follows his every movement like a predator, reveling at the little cracks in his unruffled façade.

“So when I offered him something to calm down, he didn’t even think before accepting,” he continues.

The doors slide open before any of them can say anything else. A small mercy.

The walk to Liam’s room is as quick as it is infinite. They stop in front of the door so incredibly soon, yet so painfully late.

“Be nice to him, I think he’s going through a phase,” Jonah chuckles as he nods for one of his men to unlock the door. “And don’t forget that this is your fault, dear.”

He barely realizes he’s entered the room until the lock clicks behind him. And then Chase’s eyes find Liam, and the world stops on its tracks, just like it always does when they are in the same room together.

He’s lying on his back, arms open and hands hanging off the bed, bandages covering the skin from Liam’s elbows to his wrists. His eyes are open, but unfocused, slow blinks that lead to nowhere even when Chase takes the first step towards him. His chest rises and falls slowly, rhythmically, a shallow blow of air through parted lips, and despite everything, Chase is happy that Liam isn’t in pain.

It is only when he stops beside the bed that Liam’s head lolls on the pillow, a sunflower looking for the sun even though no real light can reach him here. Still, he looks, and half-lidded eyes roam around the room before finally stopping on Chase’s face.

“Hey,” Chase says, curling one hand into a fist while the other clutches the edge of the bed.

“Mmgh,” Liam slurs with a shuddering breath and a crease on his forehead before trying again. “I, mm, I’m not, n-uh not feeling… well.”

“How can I help?” Chase’s voice is hoarse and low, pained, but Liam hears it. He hears it and he whimpers, shaking his head no.

Make it stop, his mouth forms, but doesn’t voice.

I can’t, Chase wants to scream, I’d give anything to make it all stop but I can’t. Instead, he softens his voice and tries to smile. “What if I do something to distract you? I… I was told you are under some strong drugs.”

Green eyes blink at him, and Chase is happy there are only the two of them in the room. He might actually lose it and punch Jonah square in the face if the man was here.

“How about I tell you a story? You’ve always liked them.”

Liam swallows, eyes darting around the room again, and even though Chase knows he isn’t listening, not really, he sits on the edge of the bed and starts talking.

“It’s about a boy who thought he could change the world, but instead changed the person who was sent to stop him.”

“Sou-sounds like a shit story,” Liam mumbles.

“Depends on how you look at it. Or who’s the one telling it, I guess.”

There’s a pause, and Liam sighs softly before talking again.

“Are you… are, are you really… here?”

The words slam into his chest, shattering anything left in there, and though Chase holds himself firmly still and keeps his face carefully free from anything but tenderness, something collapses inside of him. Maybe it’s his heart. It feels like it, and he wants to cry, to grab Liam and leave, but he can’t, and Liam strains to focus on his eyes, so Chase smiles like there isn’t burning agony rippling through him.

“Do you want me to be?”

“I, I don’t, I don’t know.” It is only a murmur, but Chase knows he’ll hear its echo in his nightmares for a long time – the uncertainty, the fear, the sadness. The helplessness.

I’m here. I would be here forever if I could.

But the words are only that – words. He can’t be here forever, nor erase all the pain he’s caused and continues to cause. So Chase picks up the pieces of his heart and pretends it doesn’t hurt to smirk and brush Liam’s hair away from his forehead like he used to do so long ago.

If he can’t take Liam away from this nightmare, the least he can do is pretend it is a dream.

“Then you should stop dreaming about me.”

“Ca-can’t,” Liam frowns, staring at the hand Chase just touched him with. “Will, will you leave? Again?”

“Only if you want me to.”

Liam looks up again, and something is missing in those eyes. A spark of life that was still there the last time they saw each other, but isn’t now. As Chase searches for the hope he always loved in the depths of Liam’s gaze, what he finds instead is sadness.

“Don’t go,” Liam breathes. “I, I, my h-head, it it it feels weird, Chase.”

“I know, love,” Chase says calmly, nothing of the wild desperation that rages inside of him seeping through the words. Not when Liam is this lost, this vulnerable. Not when it is the first time he has called Chase by his name after the betrayal. “It’ll pass.”

“I’m scared,” he murmurs, shifting on the bed. “But, I, I don’t remember… why.”

“You are okay, Liam. I promise. You’ll be okay.”

Liam closes his eyes and shakes his head, and when he speaks, his voice is only a whisper, gone even before he finishes. “I don’t believe you.”

Chase bites on his lip and creases his forehead, but none of it shows when he takes Liam’s hand in his own and gives it a little squeeze.

“I know. That’s okay too.”

But Liam isn’t there anymore to hear it. His body sags on the bed, taken away by the drugs, and Chase is left alone in Liam’s cell, watching the boy he’d kill and die for fall asleep. As he does, all Chase can think about is that he needs to get Liam out of here. Somehow, he needs to get him away, no matter the cost of it.

An hour goes by, and though it is one of the worst hours of Chase’s life, is it the first time he doesn’t feel like a part of his heart is bleeding in days. Not when he can see the bleeding part right in front of him.

He wants to wake Liam up, to hear his voice while he can, before he’s forced to leave again. But there’s peace on his face as he sleeps, and Chase can’t take him back to reality when he looks like he used to, like he could wake up at any moment and kiss Chase with a smile.

And then the door opens, and the memories vanish as Chase reluctantly gets up. As soon as he does though, Liam stirs on the bed, frail hand reaching out and grabbing Chase’s wrist before he can move away.

“You promised me… a… um, a story.”

Liam’s eyes open for a moment before closing again, but he doesn’t let go. Chase shoots one look at the guards waiting by the door and knows that nothing good will happen if he waits. He has to play nice if he wants to get Liam out.

Chase looks down at Liam again, and when he finds half-lidded eyes struggling to stay open, he can’t stop his voice from breaking mid-sentence.

“It’ll have to stay for another time, okay? I’ll see you soon, love.”

Liam’s eyes flutter back closed with a soft sigh. His voice is soft as the tears that sting Chase’s eyes when he speaks. “You al–, you always leave in real life too.”

Chase can’t find an answer before he is dragged out of the room by a firm grip he knows better than to fight. He yanks his arm away as soon as the door locks him and Liam on different sides, and hears the words rattling around his head while he is lead to sit in Jonah’s office to hear what the man wants next. All the way back to his house.

He doesn’t think when he calls Zoey. All he hears is Liam.

All he can see is Liam’s lost gaze, the life fading out of his eyes. All he knows is that if he lets him in Jonah’s claws one more second without doing anything, he might actually, truly, crumble down until he can’t pull himself back up.

He is sitting on his couch, hands over his face and elbows on his knees just like they have been since he got home, when his friend opens the door.

“Oh, Chase,” she breathes as soon as she sees his face and sits beside him. “What happened?”

He doesn’t get to crumble down. Not when it’s Liam the one being hurt. The one branded and tortured and kidnapped and betrayed. Still, when Zoey’s gentle arms wrap around him, he hugs her back.

“It’s Liam,” he says, fighting to get the words out through his heaving breaths, trying to force his mind to put them together long enough for someone else to know it too because he can’t do this on his own. He thought he could, he thought he was enough, but he isn’t and he needs to get Liam out, no matter what, no matter how, he has to, he has to before the light goes out in that beautiful green gaze. “He, I, he’s caught and it’s my fault and I thought I could keep him safe but I can’t and now–“

“Chase, breathe,” she commands, and he answers. It’s all he knows how to do, isn’t it? Answer orders. Look at what happens when he’s left on his own. “Let’s start from the begging.”

So Chase does.

(next)

[broadstflyers]

i just have to get this out of my system, i'm really sorry y'all-- i know it was a bad game but i just want to post about me getting a puck from bobby brink because it was really cool

so feel free to skip this 100%

anyways *ahem*

so i had my sign out, it said "WELCOME TO THE SHOW, BOBBY BRINK"

and he came out for his solo rookie lap, and he saw it IMMEDIATELY and SMILED, and it made me happy because i could tell he appreciated it a lot

and then i swear y'all, some the flyers swung around and looked at it, and then bobby went to talk to kevin hayes and kind of looked over at my sign, i knew that he had seen it for sure

he kept looking at the sign throughout warmups-- and we locked eyes a few times and i literally mouthed "bobby" lmao

and then, when everyone was off the ice, he came over to me and nodded and threw the puck up and i caught it with ONE HAND. i felt like a badass ngl. he smiled at me and i went into fuckin hysterics and i lost my shit lol

anyways thank you for entertaining me and my story

[queen-of-the-queers]

Part One: Jabitha: Don't Leave Me

Sorry for the major writing break y'all! This piece is based off an anonymous theory for one of the next ethat someone sent in to @jabitha-endgame.

You can read the inspiration here (sorry for poor quality):

Anyway, let me know if you actually want a part two of this, and my requests are officially open, so hit me up, whatever you'd like.

...

“It’s ok Jug, take your time.”

“I-I-I can’t,” he whispered.

It felt like hours since Tabitha had arrived home to find Jughead curled up in the corner of their bed, breathing heavily and muttering to herself. She had immediately tried to grab his hand, only to be pushed away. The shock left her blinking tears from her eyes- but she knew that she had to be strong for him.

Now, she found herself kneeling in front of his curled-up form, trying to coax some form of explanation from him. He still wouldn’t let her touch him.

“Try and focus on your breathing. In and out. I’ve got you, I’m here,” she said gently.

Shit! What did her therapist tell her to do in situations like this? Something about a five-step process…

“Oh!” she said suddenly, “Jug, I need you to tell me three things you can see.”

He buried his head in his hands. Tabitha felt an infuriating temptation to reach over and brush his hair out of his eyes but managed to hold herself back. She knew initiating touch was futile.

He groaned, “Uh, you, bed,” he trailed off, “oh my god, I can’t see anything else.” His voice seemed to climb five octaves and he grabbed the pillow out from behind him and buried his face in it.

“Ok, that’s ok,” she replied, “Why don’t we-”

Suddenly, she was interrupted by the ringing of her phone, an Elton John song blaring from her pocket. She reached into it and checked the caller ID: Toni.

“Hey, Toni, this really isn’t a good time, so could I maybe-”

Her friend cut her off immediately.

“Tabitha, are you with Jughead? Something’s going on?” Tabitha drew her breath in sharply.

“Yeah. What’s going on your end?”

A muffled bang echoed through the receiver and Tabitha held it away from her ear.

“Tones?”

“Sorry about that. Look, Cheryl walked into the Wyrm about half an hour ago, completely hysterical. She keeps trying to hide in places and she’s saying that her mom’s coming to get her?”

Tabitha stood up and walked a few paces away into the corridor. She made sure to keep a careful eye on her boyfriend, still squeezing the cushion into his face.

“Jughead’s not doing well either,” she lowered her voice, “He’s panicking, and he won’t talk to me or- or let me try to comfort him.”

Tabitha felt her lip begin to tremble, certain that Toni had heard her voice break as she spoke.

“Hey, everything’s going to be ok. I’m gonna call Betty and see if she has any idea what’s going on, but I need you to try and get through to Jughead. Just try and stay calm, yeah?”

“Yeah. Thank you, Toni.”

She hung up and took a deep breath. It was essential that she remained composed, for Jughead’s sake.

...I

I hope you liked this! Let me know if you want a part two.

Have a great day/night. Bye darlings!

*Kind comments and reblogs always appreciated xo

[widowswineapologist]

I'm loving these headcanons about Ultimis Tank bc you write them so well <3 What would it be like trying to have a movie night in together (making Jiffy Pop together, blankets, cuddling etc.)? My favorite movie is Die Hard which I know would be his favorite too, but I don't think Mr. Stronk Man can handle my taste in scary movies (think TCM2 or Silence of the Lambs)

a/n: AA THANK U!! also im sorry im so uncultured i don't think I've even watched half of those movies- also modern au bc i said so 

- OH BOY. 

- I think movie night would be kind of spontaneous, on Dempsey's part. He'd randomly show up at your place with bags full of snacks and tell you to turn your favorite movie on. The only warning you get beforehand is a text from him saying he's coming over. 

- Personally I believe he is a slut for horror movies, but specifically movies that actually scare him, because he likes the adrenaline rush. He also enjoys action movies and comedies. 

- (He's probably a major Marvel fan, if you spoil anything he will ghost you for a week.) 

- Movies that actually scare him would focus on paranormal stuff. Think like the Conjuring movies. Yeah, they're kind of bad (well, really bad), but he's a lot more afraid of things he can't actually stand against. He's also a little desensitized to gore but please for the love of god don't show him anything involving eyes or broken ankles, he will lose his shit. 

- That aside, I think movie night with him would be more like "Dempsey talking your ear off while you try to watch the movie" night. 

- NO SERIOUSLY HE MAKES ME THINK OF MY MOM AND HOW WHENEVER SHE WOULD TAKE US TO THE MOVIE THEATER SHE'D BE TALKING THE ENTIRE TIME. (it was funny though the audience would usually laugh at her antics)

- Movie Critic Dempsey Time™ he absolutely will rip movies apart if he thinks they're stupid. (If you like them he'll keep his mouth shut but he'll occasionally poke fun at it because he thinks you look cute when you pout.) 

- I think he'd let you lay on his chest while watching movies tbh. He has those kind of vibes. Just lazily drapes his arms around you while you lay there. You can hear his heartbeat and he can practically talk in your ear now but he doesn't notice unless you say anything. And if you do, he will definitely take advantage of it. (Sir please stop whispering in my ear this is movie night not netflix and chill) 

- It's fun until one of y'all needs to go to the bathroom 💀

- Bonus shenanigans: please get microwaveable popcorn this motherfucker will destroy your entire kitchen trying to use the stove, sometimes when he's feeling particularly devious he will cover your eyes when an inappropriate scene comes on because he thinks its funny, please consider getting drunk and watching horton hears a who with him it would be fucking hysterical, dempsey highkey kins cinema sins, everytime a movie scares him and you poke fun at it he'll respond saying it's "still not as scary as the video of richtofen's birth" SOBS, DEMPSEY WOULD LOVE DEADPOOL I JUST KNOW IT

[tipsydipsydo]

➳ "look at how fucking wet you are- it’s running down your thighs like a mess."

➳ "you’re so fucking pathetic, it’s almost funny."

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Gender of the Reader: female

Word Count: 702

Rating: 18+

Genre: Smut!

Warnings: Dirty Language + Dirty Talk; Sex Toys; Semi-Public; Making out in the Kitchen; Grinding; Degradation; Teasing; Begging; slight fingering; Mentions of rough Sex

A/N: I'm so sorry Anonie that it took me so long!!🤧💕 But I've finally written it and I hope y'all enjoy it~ (Because I'm a lazy bitch, it's unedited as fuck, so just take it xD)

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「© tipsydipsydo」

This following story is my intellectual property and belongs only to my blog tipsydipsydo.tumblr.com!

I’ll not accept any kind of reposting, stealing or using/editing my work!

That includes reposting my content on other social media platforms too, even when you link me as the original author.

Thank you.

An incredibly relieved sigh leaves your throat as Jungkook unlock the front door of your shared apartement. You stumble through the hallway into the kitchen, trying your best to find some kind of balance on your high heels. You're breathing hard, your legs are weak and they're trembling.

Lips are pressed into a thin line, you suspressed the urge to whimper or to moan out through the whole dinner time, so you didn't want to give Jungkook the satisfaction now.

You wear a vibrating, remote-controlled bullet under your lace panties. They're completely soaked and your juices are smeared all over the top of your thighs. Tears are dwelling up in your eyes, you are so close to cry out of frustration and overstimulation from the orgasm denial.

It was Jungkook's Idea. He said it would be fun. If you wouldn't be so damn near to cry, you would start laughing in a hysterical and cynical manner.

A breathless hum escapes your pressed lips, gripping the edges of the kitchen island with both hands and closing your eyes, desperately trying to get at least some of your sanity back.

Jungkook is chuckling dirty behind you, strolling casually into the kitchen and gives your ass a firm squeeze. You hiss like a mad cat, turn a little bit to him and give him the dangerous side-eye. The only thing he do is simply laughing and giving your ass a gentle slap now.

"Aww, it seems like my sweet kitten didn't liked our little play session at the restaurant, hm?", he wispers teasingly into your ear, standing behind you.

"Well, I just say, I had a lot fun the last few hours... You was so adorable to watch you looking around the whole time, scared that someone of the waiters or other guests could've caught us... Just the thought of you squirming under me, like you squirmed around on your seat back in the restaurant made me so fucking hard, Baby...", grunts your Fiancé and grinds his hips forward.

A needy mewl comes over your parted lips when you feel his hard bulge between your ass cheeks. You want to ignore the urge to push your ass out to get even more pleasurable friction, you did so well the last hours, you just can't give in to simple cock-rubbing-against-your-ass!

Unfortunately you made this decision not with Jungkook, it's his goal for this day, to make you and your pride crumble until you're literally begging for his cock.

His right hand sneaks around your waist and slips under the hem of your short and skintight cocktail dress. A deep growl comes up from his chest when he feels the wetness on his fingertips.

"Fuck... look at how fucking wet you are- it's running down your thighs like a mess."

He's growling and starts sucking harshly on your weak spot- your pulse point. Fingers have found their way to your most sensitive part, rubbing tight circles on your clothed swollen pearl. Pushing you forcefully to your bearable limit within seconds- until you finally reach the point where you would throw your entire pride away without a second thought.

A you whine out in need and desperation, rutting your hips furiously forward as if you're a dog bitch in your heat. Jungkook, this little bastard smirks just smugly, his ego is up-boosted to an almost unhealthy extent.

"You’re so fucking pathetic, it’s almost funny.", giggles your boyfriend condescendly.

Honestly, you don't care anymore as what Jungkook calls you, your body and your mind is craving just one thing. Jeon Jungkook's cock. And you would do everything for it.

"I don't care, Daddy. God... please, I need you so badly, please finally fuck me and rearrange my guts, use me as your cocksleeve, as your fuckdoll, whenever. Please use me, tell me what I need to do, to get your cock!"

Jungkook smiles very satisfied, he achieved his goal, you already slipped into your Sub-Space. He can't wait to finally ruin all of your slutty holes and mark them as his.

[akitokihojo]

Monster - Chapter 10

chapter index

Hello I have returned. Have the next chapter.

CW: grooming

Also, please note that I have officially changed the rating of the story on AO3 and FF.net regarding *future* chapter(s). And don't act like y'all don't even know why. :)

-------

“I can’t believe that actually worked.” Kagome mentioned amusedly, walking a few feet behind her half demon companion.

“I told you it would. I can’t believe you tested out the sharpness on your thumb.” Inuyasha sarcastically sneered with an irritated roll of his eyes, his head slightly bobbing to the side.

“I didn’t test it out, and you know it.” Kagome half laughed - half sighed. “I just wanted to see the job Totosai did. It was super sharp!”

“Yeah, no fucking kidding, huh? I’m not sure if you know this, though, but you see things with your eyes.”

“It was an accident, you butt.”

“Will you hurry up and fix your tits so I can take a look at your cut already?” He pressed heatedly, intentionally keeping ahead of her.

Kagome had been wrestling with the lacing of her bodice for a few minutes now; ever since they left the inn. They were finally outside of the village and wandering through the forest, but it was a little tricky to get her breasts in order while keeping a steady pace behind Inuyasha. That, and finagling the strings with one less thumb so she wouldn’t get blood on her clothing.

“You know, now that you mention it, you haven’t looked at me since I tightened my bodice up. What’s up with that?” Kagome questioned, holding the loosened garment an inch away from her chest to try and shake her breasts down a little. No good. Not loose enough yet. She really went to town this time.

“You want me to?” He countered with a brazened tone.

“I mean, it’s not that I want you to. I don’t necessarily care one way or the other.”

“I’m trying to be respectful.”

“It was your idea for me to objectify myself, Inuyasha.”

“So? That’s different. It was Totosai objectifying you, and it served a purpose. You got your shit for free. It worked. Now put them away.”

“I’m trying! They wont work with me.” She laughed. It was honestly funny that he was so stiff ahead of her, so insistent to avoid looking at her.

“How bad is your thumb?”

“Eh, not too bad. It’s dripping down my hand, though.”

“Goddamn it, Kagome!” He ground out exasperatedly.

“Just turn around, oh my god.” Kagome laughed again, shaking her head.

“No.”

“You act like you won’t have anything else to look at if you do. Like, I don’t know, my eyes? Or, maybe even my thumb?”

“Fix your tits.”

“My nipples aren’t showing. It’s just a bit of cleavage.”

“I’m serious.”

“So, am I. My nipples really aren’t showing.”

“Oh my fucking god.”

“Ah! Inuyasha, it’s going down my forearm!” Kagome commented in a panicked tone, readjusting the way she held her arm as she quickly yanked her sleeve back so her blood wouldn’t stain.

Quickly, Inuyasha spun around, but he abruptly stopped before he could even reach for her hand, amber eyes landing on her chest and then hastily shooting up to her face. She watched his cheeks change colors, three shades of red appearing just beneath his eyes before he glared and turned back around to keep walking.

“Hey!”

“Fix ‘em.”

“Are you afraid of boobs, Inuyasha?” God, she was trying so hard not to laugh right now. She’d never seen anyone as flustered as he was now, and it was extremely difficult not to poke fun at him. “Is that what’s happening? Do my breasts intimidate you?”

“Kagome, don’t think I’m opposed to leaving you here alone until you fix your wardrobe malfunction.”

“You wouldn’t.” She stated plainly with a shrug he didn’t see.

“Oh, fuck you. Yes, I would.”

“And, leave me defenseless with a bleeding thumb and my tits out for all to take advantage of?” Obviously, that was a joke, but despite the lighthearted tone, she knew it would grind Inuyasha’s gears. He stopped walking and she heard the deep, hot inhale through his nose, literally watching his fingers furl into fists. It didn’t take a genius to know that he desperately wanted to leave her just to prove a point, but he couldn’t because there really was the possibility that she’d be an easy target.

“Go ahead,” Kagome laughed defeatedly, stopping behind him. “Say it.”

“Fuck you.” He huffed out through clenched teeth. “You’re manipulative.”

“Is there anyway I can kindly manipulate you into maybe helping me?” She almost mumbled, staring down at her chest while she struggled with one hand now.

“Kagome, what!?” Inuyasha lolled his head dramatically.

“I never realized how much I needed my thumbs for this. It was a struggle at first, but since I’m dripping now, I’m down to one hand entirely. I need help.”

“My help!?”

“Do you speak squirrel? Maybe you can get one of those guys to do it - yes, you’re help!” Kagome fired. “Stop being a sissy and just turn around. I promise my breasts wont bite you.”

“I hate you. I hate you so much right now.” He murmured, sliding his heel around in the dirt to face her. His golden eyes drifted around, never landing on her at all. They went from the right, above her, back to the right, then all the way over her and to the left.

“God, Inuyasha, I’m not asking you to grope me! Start from the bottom and pull this string.” Kagome waited a moment, observing Inuyasha’s discomfort, his blush, his tense stance. With a groan beneath her breath, she rolled her eyes again. “Would you feel better if I covered my cleavage?”

“I’m not sure.” He admitted.

“Fine, I’ll just do it, myself. But, stop for a minute. It’s even harder to do while walking.” Kagome conceded with a sigh. She turned around so Inuyasha would hopefully be more comfortable, pulling her sleeve as far back over her elbow as it would go to struggle with her lacing again with a little less risk of a mess. She continued on grumbling, “I don’t know what you’re problem is, though. I know damn well you’ve seen boobs before. Don’t act like mine aren’t nice. Mine are perfectly nice.”

With a feisty huff, Inuyasha gave in, giving her what she wanted with a little taste of her own medicine.

“Fine,” He grunted, grabbing her shoulder and yanking her around. Kagome unsuspectingly stood there, shocked, eyes wide as he flicked her hands away from her bodice. Inuyasha worked from the bottom up, yanking the strings loose as her body jostled slightly from the force of his movements. “Yes, your tits are nice. Is that what you want to hear? That’s not the problem though. You’re not someone I’m trying to hit and quit. You’re Kagome. I was being respectful. I refuse to make you feel objectified or uncomfortable.“ Finally loose enough, Inuyasha grabbed it from the top and wiggled her chest back and forth so her breasts would fall back into their proper place. Then, he went right back to tightening it up properly, going by how they usually looked as he pulled the strings taut, again her body jostling back and forth with his motions. “But, you just think it’s so funny, don’t you? You’re such a fucking brat sometimes, I swear. Well, fine. You want my help? You got it.” Inuyasha declared, quickly tying off the ends of the strings, and giving the top plush of her tits a finishing pat.

Kagome stared at him, stunned. There was a partial smile on her mouth, but it hung open, the heat of her face bubbling and bright. Inuyasha took in her blush, how it was taking forever to process what the fuck had just happened, and he cocked an arrogant smirk at the embarrassment he’d caused her to swim in.

“How’s it feel?” He asked smugly.

“I deserved that.” She remarked, trying to pinch her lips into a straight set line so she wouldn’t laugh. She hadn’t seen that coming. Not at all. “The - uh - the boob tap was a nice touch. No pun intended.”

There was a moment where he inhaled slowly, eyes blinking closed as his brows furrowed and creased deeply, but he couldn’t hold it. The both of them started laughing hysterically, his own coming out as a sort of snort from how hard he’d tried to bite the reaction back.

“Fuck, I can’t stand you!” He laughed, planting the palm of his hand on his forehead before sloppily dragging his silver bangs away.

“I’m sorry! I just didn’t expect to be manhandled by you!” Kagome had slightly doubled over from how funny it was. Anyone else, and she would have punched their lights out. But, this was Inuyasha. And, he went from zero to a hundred real freaking quick. It was both surprising and hilarious at the same time.

“How fucking old is that bodice? Why did I have to put so much effort into such a small thing?” Inuyasha stressed.

“Pretty old.” She giggled, testing the flexibility of his job. Honestly, it was nearly perfect. A smidgen tighter than she liked it, but not at all something she couldn’t live with. “I wear it all the time so it fits better to my body, but I’ve had to replace the lacing a few times already. I might be due for new strings. These ones like to stick in the holes and it makes it harder to pull loose - I know.”

“You’d better hope that thing doesn’t rip right off of you in the heat of battle.” He chuckled.

“Shh, don’t say that.” Kagome hushed. “You’ll jinx me.”

“Let me see your cut, you fucking idiot.” Inuyasha wagged his fingers to usher her hand over, taking it to inspect the small nick closely. It really was fucking tiny. How the fuck was it bleeding so much? “Turn around.”

Kagome pursed her lips and did as instructed, letting Inuyasha pull the drawstring of her bag loose and wriggle something free. With his clutch on the sack, her twisted her back to face him, opening up the canteen of water and slowly pouring some on the little laceration.

“Seriously, how did you even do this?”

“I don’t even know. I think my grip on the arrowhead just kind of slipped and I accidentally cut myself.”

“I can’t take you anywhere. You’re so fucking clumsy, it’s annoying.”

“Catch me, I’m swooning.” Kagome sarcastically remarked at his abrasive words with a playful roll of her eyes.

The corners of Inuyasha’s lips inched upward as he handed her the canteen to hold in her free hand, reaching into his pocket. The hanyou pulled out an off-white handkerchief, unfolding it before her with a little flick.

“Is that a flower on the corner? Inuyasha, I didn’t take you as a floral kind of guy.” Kagome giggled teasingly.

“Ha-ha.” He sneered. “A harlot gave it to me.”

“When?” Kagome hadn’t had the opportunity to hold back the rise in her tone before the word slipped off her tongue. It was shocked, and defensive, and almost territorial. Immediately, as she realized how she’d sounded, she fixed her expression and shut her mouth.

Inuyasha arched a brow, resisting the reflex to smirk. He didn’t take Kagome as the jealous type, but he’d caught it. No matter how quickly she’d adjusted herself and shifted her eyes away. Not to mention, there was a slightly embarrassed flush on her cheeks.

“Before I met you.” He said, finally letting himself smile, though it was smug as all hell. He could feel it. “We didn’t fuck.”

“Oh, that’s not it.” Kagome hastily reassured, giving a dramatic, one-shouldered shrug. “I was just a little surprised because I didn’t see you talk to anybody, so I was like ‘wow, when did another woman approach’, right? Because, like, I was right next to you most of the time, except for, like, when I went downstairs to the tavern to eat, but I highly doubt you would have snuck someone in then. Of course, even if you did, that’s none of my business. But, it was just, when we were shopping in the market avenue, we were right next to each other the whole time, so, like, I was just shocked because, wow, I didn’t see anything, so if it happened, it had to be super stealthy. I was just surprised, is all, but if it happened before we even met, then that makes a lot more sense. It’s actually a really pretty handkerchief.”

Good lord, she rambled when she was flustered. Inuyasha shrugged his brows, sighing deeply as he ignored her, taking the corner of the cloth between his teeth and ripping a long portion off.

“And, now it’s not.” Kagome deadpanned.

“Will you shut up already?” Inuyasha grumbled, wrapping the torn away length of cloth around her thumb to tie securely. “There. You’re gonna make it.”

“Thanks, doc.” She said with a cute pout.

Inuyasha’s ear flicked as he took the canteen to shove back in her bag, stopping for a moment to analyze the noise he’d caught. Light footsteps, small gait, single person, careful treading. Not in a stalking manner, though. It was nearby, but it didn’t seem like they were attempting to creep up in any way. With an attentive sniff, Inuyasha caught the scent of a human. One who made home more often in a forest than anywhere else. They had a woodsy scent, a fresh campfire lingering on their clothing. With how light they seemed, Inuyasha was willing to guess they were female. Though, he has been wrong before. It could also be a child. They had the tendency of ambling similarly, albeit with more frequent stumbling. Nevertheless, they were fine so long as both parties minded their own.

“You done rambling?” He asked as he came around the side of her, notching his head to signal for them to continue on.

“I wasn’t rambling.” She weakly defended with a barely audible huff from her nostrils.

“Okay,” He chuckled. “Well, if that’s the case, then keep your voice down. There’s someone nearby.”

“Who?”

“No one we need to worry about. Human. I just don’t want to attract attention our way.”

“Roger that.” Kagome nodded, sealing her lips and walking by his side.

Silence, talking, bantering, it was all comfortable with Inuyasha at this point. There was something that had shifted between them over the past couple of days. After he’d gone to sleep on his human night, Kagome laid there awake, listening to the peacefulness of his deep breathing. It wasn’t often that he slept, but he seemed to fall asleep pretty quickly that night. All she could hope was that he was okay and comfortable, and that he woke up well-rested.

But, she worried that maybe she’d pushed the boundaries with all the touching she’d done on him that night. She was a little more handsy than normal. Granted, it was only his hair, arm, and legs, and they’d held hands for about thirty seconds, but it was still abnormal and slightly unwarranted. Kagome got a bit in her head by overthinking the situation. She was slightly overly affectionate, which was weird on its own because this was a different sort of affection she hadn’t really understood or explored before. And, while she wanted to blame the one beer she’d consumed and Koga’s insinuation of her feelings for Inuyasha, by the next morning, she knew she couldn’t. She knew it made sense for a reason. How could she deny that she had an attraction toward him?

Thing was, Kagome was worried she’d made it too apparent. He was so close to her, they were touching like it was second nature, and she hadn’t even considered that she may have been overstepping a boundary. She’d hoped, sincerely hoped, that things wouldn’t be awkward in the morning.

Luckily and surprisingly, they weren’t. Though, things weren’t quite the same either. Inuyasha walked a few inches closer to her. They’d decided to stay in town for another day for a little rest - which she knew was because he was aware of how exhausted she was from all the extra effort she’d been putting into her training and growth. That, he wouldn’t openly admit, though. Nor, would she expect him to. It was good enough for her to be able to read him, and that was all Kagome needed to appreciate. They ate breakfast in Kaede’s tavern, and he kicked the toes of her boots a few times. It was a casual thing as they waited and conversed, but it was new. She wouldn’t necessarily call it footsies though. That was a little too cutesy of a stunt for Inuyasha to ever pull. Then, he took her around the town, discretely showing her some of the deterrents Kaede had previously mentioned. He stayed close. Always close. Especially, when he took her to the market avenue.

There was a bit of a crowd even Inuyasha seemed surprised about. Kagome could tell he wasn’t a fan of them right away. His ears swiveled unpleasantly, almost pinning down for a brief moment, and he seemed to stiffen minutely. Nothing too obvious, but she’d caught the difference. She was quick to suggest they come back later, but the hanyou shook his head, clearing his dissatisfaction.

“Stay close.” He’d instructed as he guided her through. “Don’t want to lose you.”

It might have meant nothing but basic kindness to him, but it caused a tiny flurry in her abdomen. That sensation spread out whenever people got a little too close to her and Inuyasha’s hand would unconsciously find the small of her back. Was it protective, or was it just to make sure they didn’t get separated? Or both? Kagome didn’t allow herself to read too far into it. She just decided to go along with it, enjoying the warmth and safety of his presence.

They ate dinner in the tavern, joked with Kaede in her downtime, played rock-paper-scissors - which was shockingly exciting for such a simple game, enjoyed one last, hot bath, and then went to bed. Of course, ending with Inuyasha wrestling with her and dumping her on the mattress like before. At some point in the day, Kagome had stopped thinking about the potential for awkward tension between them, she stopped thinking about accidentally overstepping boundaries the night before, she stopped thinking about incidentally making Inuyasha uncomfortable with her affection, because it felt like he was partaking in growing closer to her, as well. It felt natural. It felt like no thought needed to be applied, and whatever was happening was organic.

Whether it was in the same nature as her or not, she wasn’t sure. And, she tried to believe it didn’t matter.

So quickly, yet still not terrifying. Not to her. Kagome had thoroughly come to enjoy his company.

“So,” She spoke, keeping her voice low so it was conversational but between them. “What did you mean by, ‘you’re Kagome’?”

“You’re Kagome.” Inuyasha repeated matter-of-factly.

“And?”

“You’re annoying.”

“And?” She giggled.

“You’re fishing for something I’m not going to give you.” He stated gruffly.

“Allow me to fill in the blanks.”

“Here we go.” Inuyasha muttered.

“‘You’re Kagome’, when looked up in a modern dictionary, can mean one of three things: Number one, I respect you so stinking much that I could never find it in myself to sexualize you non-consensually. Number two, I’m not attracted to you and it makes me feel uncomfortable that you have such nice breasts because I would rather not view you as a sexually appeasing woman. Number three, you’re one of the bro’s.”

“Number four, you’re an idiot I can never get to shut up, so it’s physically impossible to be attracted to someone like you.” He added.

“Hah! Says the guy who got shy at the sight of a little cleavage.” Kagome playfully teased.

“Why are you not offended when I call you ugly?” Inuyasha chuckled, his expression twisting bemusedly.

Kagome stopped, an obvious pout replacing her grin. “You think I’m ugly?”

Inuyasha turned to look at her, his face shifting seriously as he panicked at her sudden hurt. “No. No, Kagome I don’t think you’re…” He paused as he watched her lips slowly curve upward, brown eyes twinkling devilishly. “I hate you.”

She laughed, “That’s why.”

“You fucking tricked me.”

“It’s one thing to not be attracted to me, Inuyasha. Of course, my feelings wouldn’t be hurt by that. But, calling me ugly would actually hurt me, and you know it, and I’ve noticed that’s something you try to avoid.”

“Hurting your feelings? I literally call you an idiot all the time.”

“Yes, but you know that doesn’t bother me.” She smiled, shrugging as she continued walking. She heard his footsteps follow behind her, crunching leaves and the thick clumps of dirt on their path.

“What makes you think I care about hurting your feelings? It’s not something I actively try to avoid, kid. You’ve probably just got a thicker layer of skin since you grew up with two boys.” Inuyasha was pulling shit out of his ass. Kagome had sort of scattered his brain for a moment. She was reading him well. Was he obvious in his attempts at taking better care of her sensitive nature?

“Nah,” She turned around to look at him, and he froze from how happy she seemed. He knew she was joking, playing around, and there was only one thing she’d said that had bothered him. That he wasn’t attracted to her. While he would rather keep it to himself, while he would rather that not be obvious information, it was still incorrect. Because, when she smiled the way she was right now, when her cheeks tinted naturally, and when the sun touched her through the tops of the trees, his heart had a tendency to clench. It wasn’t painful, it wasn’t jolting, but it was there. Of course, he found her appealing to look at. There were so many sides to her that he’d been able to witness over the weeks, and he genuinely only disliked one. Her sadness. Her tears. It wasn’t that they were ugly. He just hated it. It had no business clouding the joyful features that he observed now. Despite all that, he genuinely wanted to see more. He wanted to see it all. He wanted to see her fierce side, her determined side, he wanted to see her scowl - pointed at others, of course - and her attitude, he wanted to see what she looked like when she danced, when she was compassionate, and at the end of the day, he wanted to see her win. Inuyasha was truly attracted to Kagome, and even though that was his business, it still didn’t sit quite well that she considered otherwise. “You’re just a big softie.”

Inuyasha deadpanned. That was the second time she’d called him that, and he was beginning to think she really believed it. “And, you’re stupid.”

“You didn’t deny it!”

“Neither did you.” The hanyou stated smugly, catching up to her side. He watched her expression flatten, and she grumpily kicked a rock out of her path. Got her.

Interestingly, the human was still nearby. He’d thought, after a while, they would have gone in some other direction, but it was almost like they were keeping up with he and Kagome. Additionally, they seemed to be walking just a bit closer. More than that. They were walking toward them now. It seemed like in a matter of minutes, they were bound to cross paths.

No. Something wasn’t right.

Inuyasha stopped, swiping his arm out in front of Kagome’s stomach to halt her as well. The girl jumped slightly at the sudden change, but she settled into place as her hands gently grabbed his forearm, attention on his hardened jaw but eventually following his gaze ahead of them.

A woman stepped out from behind a thick-trunked tree, an emotionless expression on her pale face as she gazed at the two of them with caramel eyes. Beneath, the skin was thin and dark, telling stories of her fatigue, though her shoulders were broadened energetically. She was thin, mid-height, wore fitted pants, but the beige blouse she donned seemed two sizes too large, tucked into her bottoms to keep the tail out of the way. On her right shoulder, she wore a quiver of arrows and a long bow, colored red and cracked from years of usage. It came from above, but a white, ghostly serpent slithered down and around the woman’s shoulders and chest, dropping a glowing light through her heart before circling her body to perch on her free shoulder with its insectile legs.

“Kikyo.” Kagome breathed, but when Inuyasha looked down at his companion, he noticed she didn’t appear as pleased or welcoming as he would have expected her to be. So, this was the great Kikyo, huh? He lowered his arm.

Kagome skeptically glanced at Inuyasha, and even though she was just touching him, she reached for him once more to feel his shoulder.

“This is real.” Kikyo spoke. “I’m not in your head. I’m here. And, before you react to anything dramatically, no, this is not the endgame we were intended to meet at.”

Inuyasha’s brows pinched together slightly, and he felt a tug pull down at the corners of his lips. Already, he wasn’t a huge fan of the way she spoke to Kagome.

It was a moment before Kagome could speak. All she could do was stare at the woman in front of her. Over the past year, she’d always imagined she would be some form of excited when meeting Kikyo in person, but Kagome currently felt no emotion in similarity. She was unhappy. She was growing increasingly more upset, a grudge she’d been holding against the woman rising to the surface now.

“Been a while.” She finally said, her tone level.

“Yes. It has been.” Kikyo walked closer, leaving just a few feet’s worth of a gap separating she and the opposite conjurer. “I’ll admit, I haven’t much felt like talking to you. I had nothing to say.”

“Oh, you haven’t?” Kagome shrugged her brows in minor challenge. “Well, ditto.”

“Ditto?”

“Means, the feeling’s mutual. I didn’t want to talk to you, either.”

“Are you claiming to be upset with me?”

“I am.” Kagome stated plainly.

“On what grounds?” Kikyo asked, a modest scowl appearing on her features.

“You first.”

Inuyasha swiftly grew uncomfortable as both women faced each other. At the reveal of who the person was, he hadn’t suspected Kagome to be any degree of unhappy, yet she faced the supposedly powerful conjurer with squared shoulders and a vexed look on her face. Now that he thought about it, she hadn’t mentioned Kikyo since that night they played the question game. He figured if they were in consistent, subconscious communication, as it previously seemed, she’d share any news. It made sense now. They hadn’t spoken. Still, no matter how badly he wanted to take a large step to the side, he resigned to remain at Kagome’s for the moment. He really hadn’t seen her in a confrontational state such as this, so he had no idea what to expect right now.

“You know what you did.” Kikyo replied.

“You mean, what I didn’t do?” Kagome cocked her head to the side. Again, the challenge was present.

“Yes.” Kikyo huffed.

“I don’t see how that’s any of your business.”

“You don’t - excuse me?” For the first time, Kagome heard a heightened inflection in Kikyo’s tone. Even when she lectured her that last time, she didn’t seem this exasperated. And, so quickly too. Kagome was sort of proud of herself. Kikyo always appeared so grounded. “This has everything to do with me, Kagome.”

“No, you think it has everything to do with you, but it really doesn’t. You voiced your opinion, I took it into account, but then I made my own decision. You and I can’t travel together, and you basically told me I’m on my own, so that means I get to call my own shots. Right? Right.”

“You’re a fool.”

“Oh my god.” Kagome’s head lolled back dramatically before finding its way to sit upright. “That again? I’m the fool, but you wanted to punish me by giving me the silent treatment for traveling with Inuyasha? Fine, I’ll take it. But, you’re immature.”

“What do you have against me?” Inuyasha inquired with a small shrug, confused. He was sidelined one moment, and then before he knew it, part of the problem.

Kikyo hissed an abrupt hushing sound at the half demon, barely looking at him before she went back to glaring at Kagome. “Tell me why you have the audacity to be mad.”

“The audacity?” Kagome guffawed, so blown away by Kikyo’s ego that she couldn’t help but back step with her jaw hanging agape. “Okay! Sure! Were you ever gonna mention that you were hanging around my village for god knows how long? That you were spotted and that was the reason Naraku’s henchmen had been visiting so frequently? Hm? Ever plan on bringing that information up, or were you just gonna sweep it under the rug?”

“Are you blaming me for -“

“No. I’m not. The girl’s death is on them. I’m blaming you for being partially responsible for making the last few months of my life hell, though! Did you watch when my mother was slapped across the face two months ago? She was hit so hard, her cheek was bruised and she spit blood. Did you sit back and relax when an old lady had her face shoved in horse shit? Her heart gave out a week later, and the doctor thinks it was from the stress. We all called her Grandma Hojo. She raised one of my friends. She was all he had left. How about the time they defiled our graveyard? Did you like that little show they put on? How I had to scoop up and bury my father’s ashes for the second time!? You really want to say that I have the ‘audacity’ to be mad at you!? Kikyo, you were right fucking there! Why did you -“

“Hey,” His voice was soothing as Inuyasha swiftly reached for her jaw with one hand, her nearest shoulder with the other, turning Kagome to face him. He bowed his head slightly, speaking only to her as he forced her eye contact. “Hey, it’s okay. Calm down, alright? Don’t visit that pain again. I don’t want you going back to that.”

The hanyou gave her a moment, and luckily Kikyo stayed stiff with silence. He didn’t let Kagome go. Truthfully, he was willing to guess even she hadn’t realized how emotional she was becoming or how the post-traumatic stress was being triggered. But, he’d seen it. He heard things he couldn’t imagine a single person having to live through, let alone this girl. This girl whose eyes brought him solace without any effort, this girl whose laughter was bubbly and sweet, this girl he was biased enough to believe deserved it all the least. Even he was slammed with the weight of the experiences she’s lived through, and these occurrences were only separated by mere weeks. But, it was at the mention of her father’s remains being disrespected that his heart wrenched painfully. If he was hurt by the thought, he knew Kagome was engulfed in that pain and anger, and that was where Inuyasha needed to reach in and yank her out. It was so easy to drown in trauma you hadn’t been able to sort through yet, and he couldn’t let it take her. She could continue arguing all she wanted. Truthfully, he loved her feisty side. This seemed like something that was waiting to come, anyway. But, she was going to stay balanced while she did it. He was there to make sure she didn’t get too overwhelmed.

Kagome took a deep breath, slightly embarrassed but thankful for her companion reeling her back to reality. She had been quickly growing so furiously heated that she wasn’t even thinking straight and her fingers had begun trembling, but his touch pulled her back to the present. She hated that she was so emotion driven, she hated that she got so passionately flustered when reliving past incidents, but none of that was important right now. Kagome nodded as she felt steadier, more level-headed, and then turned out of his grasp, looking back at Kikyo. She could feel the slant of her own eyes, though. Her glare held no forgiveness yet. She wanted to hear Kikyo’s explanation, and quite frankly, deserved it.

“You do blame me.” Kikyo stated more than questioned, a slight frown tugging at her lips.

“I blame you for what you’re responsible for, yes.” Kagome replied. “I blame you for just standing by and watching. I blame you for knowing the havoc you’d caused, but never giving any sort of warning. You had plenty of opportunities. You communicated to me in my dreams, but all you ever said was, ‘the responsibility is ours.’ Not once did you slip in a, ‘hey, I fucked up. Look out.’”

Kikyo’s caramel eyes fell to the forest floor, the muscles at the joint of her jaw flexing and nostrils flaring. There was the smallest quiver in her chin, but she tucked it in the hopes that it wouldn’t be noticed. A heat was rising through her chest, her neck, her face, and all too soon, her nervous ticks began to kick. Her hips swayed side-to-side, her fingers clenched and unclenched repeatedly, she gnawed on her thin, bottom lip, and she blinked profusely because she’d be damned if anyone saw a single tear from her.

“I - I didn’t know what to do.” Kikyo hesitantly admitted.

Kagome didn’t speak. In fact, she sealed her lips. The floor belonged to Kikyo.

“It took forever to find you, and when I had, I didn’t want to forget your face or your village. It was difficult to locate to begin with. I did - um - I did make a mistake, Kagome. I wasn’t paying as close attention to my surroundings as I should have been. I got too relaxed, and hadn’t realized I’d been seen at first. When it became apparent, it was too late. I tried wandering away, even going so far as to intentionally be seen elsewhere to try and drag the attention away from you and yours, but I was unsuccessful. Thing was, so long as I remained evasive, things weren’t going to be as bad as they could have been. Things were terrible, I know, but if they had caught me, that is when Naraku would have shown up. Or, could have. I don’t know how that would work or how they would gather his attention, but it wasn’t a chance I was willing to take. They could not involve him if they did not have me.”

“But, why didn’t you say anything to me?”

“I did not want you to go looking for me. Knowing I was right there, you would have come searching.”

“You could have at least warned me to expect the worst. You could have said something.” “Kagome, I am a conjurer. I am not clairvoyant. I had no idea what was coming for you once I had been seen.”

“Okay, fair.” She huffed agitatedly. “But, you never said anything to me afterward, either.”

“It was in the past.”

“Oh, screw you!” She snapped, stepping back again.

“It wasn’t something you needed to focus on, anymore!”

“I really can’t get a read on you! Are you that cold!? Are you that insensitive!?”

“No!” Kikyo was beginning to crack. She didn’t know how to properly explain herself, how to make Kagome understand that her intentions were pure and not cruel. Naturally, Kikyo had a difficult time emotionally connecting with others. Ever since she’d met Naraku, ever since her life and heart had taken a nosedive into turbulent waters, connecting grew exponentially more difficult. Throw that in with the fact that human interaction was few and far between, she was in a disposition where she legitimately felt blocked. How did she make Kagome understand? Did she overshare? It was uncomfortable to consider, but even now, where she stood, she was uncomfortable already.

“You didn’t even help! You just watched! You watched peoples’ homes get torn apart, you watched my family suffer, you watched women get thrown around and harassed, one was almost raped last month, Kikyo!”

“Kagome, I didn’t mean -“

“No! Stop it! I looked up to you! You made me look up to you! I thought you were my hope, I thought you were everyone’s hope! Lo and behold, you were five feet away the whole time, and you just watched!” Kagome’s voice cracked from her zeal, her fury. “And, you want to tell me it’s a thing of the past!? Tell that to Hojo! Tell that to my mother! No, you know what? Go ahead and tell that to any male in my village. They’ll still take it as personally as any woman who’s been at the wrath of the henchmen’s hands. Go ahead, Kikyo. Tell that to my cousin and little brother. See how they’d respond.”

“I just - I didn’t -“ Kikyo’s breathing had increased. Her pale cheeks were now painted red, her eyes were bloodshot, her lips were bitten, pressed, and sucked so hard that they finally hued pink. Her chest rose and fell heavily from the way her lungs pumped air in and out, that her breasts actually pressed against the cloth of her baggy shirt. “If I did something, there was - there was the chance that I wouldn’t get them all. They were working off of inconclusive evidence of my presence since they had nothing tangible, so if I basically confirmed I was there and failed to kill every last one of them, Naraku would come. Kagome, Naraku wouldn’t hesitate to kill you all just to find me. He would have you killed. I couldn’t - no. I didn’t know what to do.”

Kagome took the sight of the breaking conjurer in. Finally, she was expressing emotion. Finally, she was showing something relatable, she was conveying tension, and anxiety, and fear, and remorse. Finally. “Were you scared?”

“No!” Kikyo hardened hastily.

“You’d only be doing yourself a favor by admitting it.” Inuyasha spoke, his tone gruff. “You’re not fooling either of us.”

A tear fell from Kikyo’s eye, but her hand swiped across her cheek to clear it so quickly. That tear served as her breaking point, though. It was like a wall she’d forged in unbreakable steel was cracking down the middle, and the weight Kikyo carried on her shoulders was bringing it to crumble. She gasped as the emotions overpowered her, as the guilt overwhelmed her, and this sensation, the denseness in her chest, the disturbing warmth that tingled over her skin, was all so foreign now that she didn’t know how to process it all at once.

She was only human. This was a bold reminder of which. Kagome’s anger began to dissipate, the flush in her body was cooling down. Her own heart clenched at the visible pain the opposite woman was in, but she didn’t know what to do to help.

“I was. I was scared.” Kikyo cried, relentlessly wiping her face of her tears. Her head was bowed so her twisted, sorrowful expression wasn’t observable, but she spoke up, despite her broken voice, to make sure the confessions she’d kept under lock and key were heard as clearly as possible. “I didn’t mean to cause so much damage, and I didn’t know what to do to correct it. There was always the risk that there were lingering demons. They didn’t always bring everyone in their pack. Their leader was smart, and the risks hanging over your head scared the hell out of me. For a while, I thought I was helping by staying out of it.”

“Well,” Kagome sighed, trying to push the remaining resentment from her veins. “You’re definitely right about something there. Their leader was smart. He rarely brought his whole squad, and when he did, it meant they were bored and all hell was about to break loose.”

“I didn’t know that them spotting me would make things harder on you. Was everything they did from that point on abnormal?” Kikyo asked, sniffling but desperately trying to pull herself together. The skin beneath her eyes was scarlet and puffy, and the tip of her nose was bright. She blinked quickly to fight off anymore tears from falling, and any that did escape was swiftly cleared away with the wet sleeve of her shirt.

“I don’t know when, exactly, they noticed you since they never said anything, but they increased their visits. Which makes sense now since it turns out they were trying to weed you out.”

“Weed me out?”

“Yeah, they thought you might have had family in my town. And, even if you didn’t, overall, they were just trying to get you to react.”

“Wait,” Kikyo shook her head slightly, perplexed. “How do you know this? I don’t understand.”

“I had a little run-in with their leader almost three weeks ago. He spilled the beans.” Kagome grumbled, recollecting on that incident.

“Oh,” The shake of her head deepened, eyes falling for a moment as she exhaled heatedly. “I - I wasn’t aware of that.”

“It’s alright. He’s dead now. All of his lugs are. Hopefully, my home is at least a little more peaceful and they’re in recovery.”

“I want you to know, I also wasn’t aware of the grave defilement. That may have happened when I was away and trying to pull the attention off of your village. I did not know you had to… your father. Kagome, I didn’t even know your father was deceased.”

“Don’t worry about it.” Kagome resigned, pushing the memory away.

“Look, this - uh - this isn’t why I came here today. I need to speak with you.” Kikyo admitted, centering herself as she raised her chin as she normally would.

“About what?”

Kikyo regarded Inuyasha was a slight shift of her eyes before glancing back over to Kagome. “In private.”

“No.” Kagome said. It was straight, like there was no room for compromise.

“Yes.”

“She said no.” Inuyasha said.

“You are not involved.”

“I am now.”

“Kagome -“

“Kikyo, whatever you tell me is most likely going to be relayed back to Inuyasha, anyway. He’s with me. We’re doing this together. So, you can talk to me with him around.” Kagome attested. “He’s trustworthy, I promise.”

“I do not deem him so.”

“Alright, that’s it. What’s your problem?” Inuyasha questioned, his attitude flaring. He cocked his head to the side, panning the woman with an indifferent stare.

“You have no business here.” Kikyo responded. “I tried to caution Kagome against traveling with you, but she’s as stubborn as a mule. Be that as it may, just because she finds you trustworthy, does not mean I have to agree.”

“You’re right, you don’t.” He shrugged, a hint of venom on his tongue. “But, that doesn’t change a damn thing, sweet cheeks. Kagome and I still come in a pair, and because she’s already declined to leave me out of it, it looks like you better get used to me being included. She’s already told you she’d only end up telling me everything, anyway. So, you might as well get talking.”

“You are highly infuriating.”

“Likewise. You’ve sparked a fight with both Kagome and I in the span of minutes. That takes skill.”

“I don’t much care about offending you.”

“Right back at ya.”

“You have no business here.” Kikyo repeated, more vexed that time.

The hanyou gestured to the girl at his side. “All the business I need.”

“Kikyo, stop.” Kagome tried. “Just tell me what you came here to tell me.”

“No.” She held up a hand at Kagome, her glare aimed at the half demon at her side. Kikyo squared her shoulders mightier, and he only stood a couple inches taller than she, so she barely had to look up at him to meet his amber eyes. “Why should I trust you? Why should I believe you’re a good asset to Kagome?”

“What is this, an interview? You think you call the shots or something?” Inuyasha challenged.

“I am more experienced than she is, so I know what your kind is like. It’s normal to have lapses in judgement when you’re fresh to the world outside of your home, and it’d be way too lucky to stumble upon someone valuable immediately. So, tell me, hanyou. Tell me why I should trust you.”

“Kikyo, stop.” Kagome ordered, going ignored.

“You’re missing the point. I don’t give a flying fuck if you trust me. Get your head out of your ass and understand that you have no fucking say here. I’m along for the ride whether you like it or not.”

“You shouldn’t be. Just your temper tells me you’re irrational and could get Kagome hurt.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?”

“That Kagome needs to be as level-headed as physically possible with every step she takes, and that she can’t afford to take chances with reckless half demons such as yourself.”

“Are you implying that I would put Kagome in danger!?” Inuyasha seethed, filled with a burning heat that rose over his body.

“I am implying that even if you kept your mouth shut, who you are is a risk on its own.”

“Kikyo!” Kagome shouted.

“Fuck you!” Inuyasha growled. He hadn’t been this angry at an insult toward his hanyou state in so fucking long, this feeling was almost unnatural to him at this point. How dare she? Who the fuck did this bitch think she was? Everything from his tongue thereafter was uncontrollable and hot, it was demanding and sharp as knives. “Says the twat who refused to even help Kagome out from the beginning because you were too scared to be caught by Naraku! Yeah, I’m a fucking half demon, Kikyo! Who gives a rats ass!? Kagome doesn’t seem to mind, but I guess you’re just so fucking entitled that you’re not used to your opinion being irrelevant! Jesus fuck, but for you to think I would ever put Kagome in danger is low! You don’t know me! Don’t pretend to know me because of my genetics!”

“Would you give your life for hers?”

“Without a second thought.” He answered quickly, furiously, his tone lethal and husky. Inuyasha realized then that Kikyo was calm. She’d relented halfway through his rant, the tiniest of smug grins appearing on her lips. What was that about? Was she egging him on? Did she believe him? Or was this what she wanted all along? Either way, he wasn’t finished. He knew what he’d said, but he felt like he needed to make sure he was understood completely with no room for misinterpretation. “I don’t give a fuck who you think you are, I don’t even care what you think of me. What matters here is Kagome, and so long as she trusts me, I’m not going anywhere. She’s safe with me. I would never intentionally put her in danger. Understand?”

“Got it.” She smiled, holding her hands up to submit. “Calling me a ‘twat’ was a bit excessive, but that was all I wanted to know.”

“Were you -“ Kagome gawked incredulously. “Were you testing him?”

“I was. He wouldn’t outwardly tell me why I should trust him in the beginning, so I had to trick him into telling me.”

“Good lord, you really need to work on your social skills.” Kagome groaned, pinching the bridge of her nose.

“I know, it’s not the greatest tactic.” Kikyo scrunched her expression remorsefully. “It’s difficult for me to properly navigate conversations; I really don’t talk to a lot of people much anymore. I’m not surprised that I’ve upset you both. I apologize, Inuyasha. I just wanted to - are you okay?”

Inuyasha had crouched down where he stood, his elbows braced on his knees as he buried his face in his hands. “You stress me the fuck out, dude.”

“I just wanted to make sure you had good intentions.” Kikyo assured, looking slightly panicked. “When a person is heated, they say their truths more passionately, and -“

“Yeah. Just talk to Kagome.” He murmured, not yet coming out of his position.

Kagome soothingly rubbed her hand over the top of his back, lightly scratching her fingers at the nape of his neck where his hairline was. “Alright, we’re all done fighting. No more of that, okay? What did you come here for?”

“Are you sure he’s okay?” Kikyo whispered concernedly to the opposite conjurer.

“He will be.” She replied in a hushed tone, as well.

“Alright, well I should - I should apologize to you, too. I should have never -“

“It’s alright, Kikyo. I understand.”

“No, you really don’t.” She confessed. “There’s a lot more that I’ve been hiding from you. I didn’t know the right time to tell you, or even how, but I fear it’s imperative knowledge.”

“What is it?” Kagome asked.

“I don’t even know where to start except to ask:” There was a brief pause as Kikyo inhaled deeply, sighing out just the same, almost in preparation. “How - how is my sister?”

Kagome didn’t take long to process her question. She pursed her lips and nodded instead, taking her hand back as her companion rose back to a standing. “I knew it. Kaede.”

Inuyasha almost instantly regretted unfurling from his ball. This chick was all over the place. One minute she’s starting fights, then she’s testing him, the next she’s admitting to withholding important information, and now she’s Kaede’s long lost sister? Holy fucking shit. This was a joke, right?

“Is she well? Healthy?” Kikyo continued, her tone substantially softer.

“Inuyasha, this is your domain.” Kagome handed over to him.

“Inuyasha?” Kikyo questioned, as if to as why Kagome couldn’t answer, herself.

“He knows her on a more personal level. I only met her because of him.”

“Wait, wait, wait. I’m gonna need a little more information here. Kaede said her sister died. Tragically.” Inuyasha stated.

“You’re her friend?” Kikyo asked hopefully.

“Yes. Focus.”

“It’s - please, just tell me she’s okay first. She has to be, right? Is that her building, or is she just working in it?”

“Kaede’s fine. She’s a fucking firecracker. The building is an inn, and yes, she owns it. Your turn.”

Kikyo cracked a small smile of relief, nodding and bowing her head as the information registered. Her sister was well. Now, came the fun part. She prefaced by taking an inconspicuous step back. With the wild energy of the two before her, and how quick they were to spring into attack mode, the last thing Kikyo wanted was to be within arm’s reach for this.

“I faked my death. It was to protect Kaede.”

Inuyasha grimaced, crossing his arms over his chest as he leaned his torso down to the side toward Kagome. “Why do I get the feeling I’m not going to like this?”

“Because, nothing good ever comes from a statement like that.” Kagome returned, giving a slight grimace, herself.

“I’m right here. I can hear you.” Kikyo grumbled.

“Sorry. Continue.” Kagome waved dismissively.

“Look,” Kikyo sighed, her shoulders dropping an inch. “I’ve known Naraku for well over a decade. We loved each other - or, at least I thought. I - I loved him, that was for certain. Now that I’m older, I see how volatile our relationship truly was, but it changes nothing. I was a teenager when we'd met and he was eleven years older, and I was too young and naive to understand the red flags I was shrugging off. Naraku was never on our side. The side of good.”

“Sorry, to interrupt, but I need to know: Did you know Naraku while he was human? Or was he a half demon by the time you two met?” Inuyasha asked, and he observed Kikyo’s expression widen in slight dismay.

“How did you know about that?”

Inuyasha blatantly didn’t answer. His look was hard, straight, his arms still crossed and lips closed. Her inquiry was valid, but he didn’t really like his questions being answered with questions constantly. She’d get her explanation in a moment, but his came first.

“I met him while he was still human.” Kikyo relented, understanding his body language. “I had planned to mention his transformation in sequence, though I will admit, I wasn’t sure how it would have come off.”

“Fair enough.” The hanyou nodded. “I had an unfortunate run-in with his indisposed state. From my angle, it’s not hard to tell what I was looking at.”

“He was -“ Kikyo ground her jaw, eyes falling to the floor as they slanted indignantly. “I wish I had known just how insane he was beneath the surface. It was criminal just how well he hid behind smiles and polite gestures, and he was so gentle with me I would have never guessed he’d one day want to kill me. He talked a little about growing stronger, tired of being human, wanting more control. I was seventeen, I didn’t know that there were people in the world that struggled with mental sickness. That they could walk into your life with a sweet smile and leave with a wicked one. I didn’t know what he’d do for this control he spoke of, and I had no idea that once he got an actual taste of it, he’d go mad for more. I’ve never been the type to wear my heart on my sleeve, so I thank myself for being guarded in the first few years of our friendship. As we fell in love, that was when I opened up about being a conjurer. A creator of light and purity. But, as he allowed demons to consume him, trading his soul for the power they offered, gradually losing whatever humanity he had left in him, Naraku became the exact opposite. Do you understand, Kagome? Do you understand why it has to be us?”

Her mouth parted as she processed the information, her voice coming out small as the revelation became clear. “Naraku is literally darkness, and we are literally light.”

“Precisely.”

“No.” Inuyasha spoke, holding the hint of defense. “I understand why it has to be a conjurer, but why Kagome, specifically? She’s never met Naraku, never seen his face, she didn’t fuck him, wasn’t there for his transformation, so why did you bring her into this?”

Kikyo took another step back, slightly uncomfortable. “I’ll get to that. As Naraku and I grew closer, developed a relationship, and I had learned to trust him, I began to open up about things that weren’t superficial. I told him I had a sister, but they never met. I practically raised Kaede, so she was the only one I held unconditionally dear. No one I mingled with would know her on a personal level until I was certain it was a lifelong commitment and they would never bring her harm. While I had developed irrevocable feelings for Naraku, I felt something was off with him, and my intuition always stung when I considered introducing them to one another. He never seemed interested either. Actually, he hates children. So, him not asking or prying helped in the sense where I never felt guilty or obligated.

“Behind my back, he began his affairs with demons, selling his soul piece-by-piece as they joined his body. He killed like it was easy. He murdered for fun. He laughed when he felt the liberation of his newfound, despicable abilities. And, he'd told me as much as soon as he saw my own at play. I was distracted by him at one point; he was playfully encouraging me, acting the part of my kindhearted partner, and my arrow hit a demon but didn’t hold enough power to kill it. Naraku walked up to it, spoke something incomprehensible, and then absorbed the demon right into his body.

“That was the moment everything slowly began to unravel. He expressed desires I didn’t share, how we would be the definition of a power couple. A demon and a conjurer taking over the world. Nothing could stop us. If I shifted my focus to darker magic, he claimed nothing ever would. We’d be untouchable. I wanted no part in that. Power was never what I craved. After the childhood I’d endured, watching my parents ripped away from us by evil, I just wanted to craft my powers well enough to ensure a peaceful life for myself and my younger sister. So, I tried. I desperately tried to save Naraku. I reasoned with him, pleaded for him to come to his senses, even used our relationship as bait. He laughed in my face. Like, I meant nothing to him.

“It felt irresponsible of me to merely leave him. What good would that do? I break up with him and leave him as a menace for the rest of the world to deal with? Like, it wasn’t my problem anymore? He’d already confessed to joyful murder, and he was only growing stronger. I was -“ Kikyo paused, sucking in a grounding breath. Expressing emotions wasn’t her forte, especially now, but honesty was what Kagome deserved. And, she knew very well by now that if she didn’t, either she or Inuyasha would call her out on it. “I was scared. No, terrified. What was I supposed to do? Even if I did take the cowardice way out, Naraku would never let go of me that easily. I was trapped. Progressively, he grew violent toward me, making horrible threats if I didn’t abide by his wishes. He made me study with a woman named Tsubaki; a dark conjurer. A year later, I had no choice but to kill her. She was tainted, deplorable, and she would rip the heart from a person’s chest without so much as an ounce of remorse.

“That was also when I knew what I had to do. I had to stop Naraku. We were polar opposites, and it came to a point where there was no denying I was the only one capable of bringing him down. Unfortunately, he was three steps ahead of me. He knew as soon as I had killed Tsubaki that it was a statement as to what side I was on. All that mattered, all that he saw, was that I was against him. So quickly, everything crumbled.

“He planned to kill everyone I cared for. Naraku set attack to my village. Everything was on fire. People were screaming, pleading for help. I made a split-second decision then. I was going to let Naraku believe he killed my sister, and I was going to let her believe he’d killed me. It was the only way to make sure either stayed away from the other. I couldn’t take the chance that he would potentially come back for her, seek her out, so I used the dark magic Tsubaki taught me.”

Kagome could see the shame visible on Kikyo’s face. It was in the way her lips and chin crinkled, in the way her brow tensed, in the way her brown eyes shifted to the side as if there were a mirror before her and she couldn’t look straight at herself. Her pale fists clenched tight, and though she lacked color, Kagome could still notice the difference in white around her knuckles. If this was a lot for Kagome to hear, to digest, it had to be overwhelming for Kikyo to confess. Had she ever faced the full brunt of everything she’d been through and everything she’d done? Was her admittance to Kagome and Inuyasha the first time she’d laid it all out on the table? It seemed to be. Pink had returned to Kikyo’s cheeks, and her sclera were bloodshot. No tears had to be fought off, though. Alternatively, Kagome observed that the minimal light remaining in the opposite woman’s irises was fading.

“I hurt Kaede. I made it seem like it was one of the demons attacking. I took her eye. Held it in my own hands. Then, created something that looked like a demon to eat me - which actually carried me away from the village. I cut my arm deep, intentionally left behind a pool of blood for Kaede to see, and I’m sure she watched the whole, conjured thing. I remember our final glances, the way she clutched her right eye socket, the incredible amount of blood all over her sweet face. She watched me die, and when I was far enough away, I screamed for Naraku. I screamed, and I screamed, because I knew that bastard was listening. When he appeared, I presented my sister’s eye while I cried. I vowed to kill him, and he laughed before disappearing.”

Inuyasha was rigid, nearly shaking. He felt horribly hot all over, his nails biting into the flesh of his palms. For the sake of his willpower, he’d turned his attention away from Kikyo, clenching and unclenching his jaw, inhaling and exhaling searing breaths from his nostrils. Kaede had no idea the truth behind her own assault. She didn’t know it had anything to do with her own sister, Naraku, that her eye was taken as a result of which, that she was harmed as a result of which, and that Kikyo was still very much alive. Without a doubt, Inuyasha knew Kaede would forgive Kikyo, but Inuyasha found himself angry on her behalf. When she’d recounted the incident to him, he could see just how heartbroken Kaede still was over it all. The ferocious woman was reduced to false smiles, a belly full of liquor, and an eye that wouldn’t meet his anymore. She was no older than fifteen at the time.

He recognized that a lot of things were out of Kikyo’s control. He understood that Naraku was the true cause of everything that had occurred, that Kikyo acted on a whim with good intentions, and that she was doing what she felt she needed to do so they both survived. None of that took away from his unmitigated resentment, though. That was his friend. That was one of his first friends, in fact. That was someone who stuck her neck out for people without needing convincing. Inuyasha couldn’t help that he was furious for her, couldn’t help that he wanted to yell at Kikyo for hurting her own sister despite the fact that she did it to save her life, and couldn’t help his natural instinct to want to protect and defend. Kaede was a good fucking person, and it wasn’t right that he now knew more about the most traumatic event she’d ever endured than she did. And, he was willing to bet Kikyo was going to insist they kept their mouths shut.

Everything he felt was vile and conflicting, and while he knew the rationality behind it all, it was extremely difficult to remain rational on his part. He knew it would be wrong to act, but it was so hard not to. Kagome must have sensed it. Kagome always seemed to pick up on his shifts lately. She’d leaned a little closer to his side; it was so inconspicuous, even he hadn’t caught her adjustment. The back of her hand lightly grazed his thigh, as if they were walking so close they’d accidentally brushed, and she kept it there. Ever so slightly, she moved it back and forth in a tender, rubbing motion, bringing him back to her in such a subtle manner that wouldn’t put any obvious attention on him. Even as she picked up the conversation and spoke to Kikyo, she kept the light touch going, gradually grounding Inuyasha until he gathered his control again.

“Okay, that explains that.” Kagome said, breathing as evenly as possible. “So -“

“So,” Kikyo resumed, pinching her lips together and finally meeting the opposite conjurer’s gaze again. “I’ve spent the last nine years or so trying to stop Naraku. I have trained tirelessly, studied ancient texts I struggle to understand, stared at pages in foreign and dead languages hoping the context of conjurers, priestesses, witches, mages, and whatever the hell else we’ve been referred to as over the centuries would suddenly make sense and help me master my skills, but I’m still not strong enough to do it. I cannot kill Naraku. I had the opportunity multiple times before he became who he is today, and I couldn’t release my arrow.”

“You still love him.” Kagome commented quietly.

“No. I hate him.”

“But, you used to.” Inuyasha joined, his tone almost lethal. He was outraged now. Was she implying that she couldn’t kill Naraku because she used to have that connection with him, so that was why she’d recruited Kagome? To do her dirty work for her? He’d better be wrong. Kikyo had better tell him otherwise and she’d better do it fast or else he was about to lose his goddamn shit.

“Yes, I used to. And, it does hold me back. I can’t do it.” Kikyo admitted. “As well as I know how evil Naraku is, I still remember the kind person he’d fooled me into thinking he was. It’s like a blockade. It won’t budge. My heart wont let me. It’s useless and it was going to lead to the destruction of so many if I didn’t find a solution. I can see the wrath in your eyes, Inuyasha. I did not choose Kagome haphazardly.”

“Then, why?” He pressed, not easing his glare.

“Do you truly think I would spin a wheel and thrust my fate onto the random name my dart landed on, Inuyasha?”

“I don’t know you. I don’t know what to think. That’s why I’m giving you the chance to explain. Take it. Quickly.”

“Inuyasha.” Kagome whispered, but he reached down, grabbing her hand from his thigh and giving her a small tug to slightly shield her behind his frame. He couldn’t prevent it. He couldn’t silence his need to protect her right now.

“Think about it.” Kikyo argued. “It’s not like there’s documentation on every conjurer in existence. I didn’t raid confidential records and select Kagome arbitrarily. There’s no such thing. Otherwise, do you really think Naraku would bother having those mindless demons searching towns and interrogating innocent families looking for any conjurers, young or old? That would be absolutely pointless, and Naraku is not an idiot. He’s maniacal, but he is the furthest thing from an imbecile. I didn’t just happen upon Kagome, I was told about her. A long time ago, there was a conjurer - no,” She shook her head in swift correction. “A priestess. She was a priestess. Midoriko. She was formidable, and a master of her skill.”

“I’ve heard of her.” Kagome clutched Inuyasha’s hand in minor excitement. She hadn’t expected things to come around this way, but finally she didn’t feel completely clueless. “Papa mentioned her. He was a well-traveled man, and I don’t exactly know how he’d gotten his information, but after he’d first brought her up, Miroku - my cousin - and I snuck into a library and found a few things on her. She was extremely powerful, but died at the hands of demons, right?”

“Right.” Kikyo nodded. “Kagome, do you believe in reincarnation?”

“Uh oh.” She murmured, expression faltering. She hadn’t meant to react as such, but Kagome had a huge feeling she was about to have a heavy reality suggested upon her. “I’ll be honest, I haven’t put much thought into it.”

“Well, I believe we are her reincarnated soul.”

“What!? Are you shitting me!?” Inuyasha barked incredulously, only grasping Kagome tighter in result.

Kikyo released a frustrated groan, pinching the bridge of her nose for a moment before continuing. “I know it sounds unfathomable, but so is a human-turned-demon, okay?”

“Half demon.” Inuyasha corrected bluntly, feeling disgusted by the thought of that lunatic receiving credit as a pure breed. Even if it was seen as a jab toward his being, at least he knew he, himself, was organic.

“Not the point.” Kikyo stated. “Much like I began communicating with Kagome in her dream state, I too was contacted. By Midoriko.”

“But, she’s dead.” Kagome said, confused. “And, you said you couldn’t be contacted that way. I specifically asked you.”

“You asked me -“

“If I could do it to you, yes. But, you responded by saying you were too guarded so it wouldn’t work.”

“I just didn’t want you to try, Kagome. For the deceased, it’s nothing but a visit. For the living, it’s dark magic. You’re playing with fire.”

“You’re a fucking conjurer! What are you talking about!?” Inuyasha asked. Already on edge, at this point it was like he was just being prodded to react.

“Trained by Tsubaki! Have you not been listening!?” Kikyo fired. “I have a history with dark conjurings. It was brief, but it was shoved down my throat. I utilized them to fool my sister and Naraku, and now I’m utilizing them for the best possible reason I can think of. Midoriko told me to find you, Kagome. She specifically told me you were vital to the success of bringing the end of Naraku. She told me your name, she told me I already knew how to find you, she told me you and I are connected, and I haven’t seen her since. The dream was too particular to believe it was nothing more than a fabrication of my brain. She gave me your name. She spoke directly to me. At that point in time, I was at wits’ end. I was willing to try anything. So, I did. And, it wasn’t easy. Subconscious communication was never taught to me, but I had remembered reading about it in one of Tsubaki’s texts. It took months to get down since I had to go by nothing but trial and error, and even longer to find you. You do not know how difficult it is to mentally link with someone you have never met in person and have only heard of on one circumstance. I had to write your name down and carry it with me so I wouldn’t chance forgetting it.

“Midoriko did not state that we were her reincarnations, but in order to locate you and communicate, I had to first figure out how we were connected. I’d initially assumed it was by distant relation, but it wasn’t until I searched deeper that I finally got somewhere. We’re tethered at the soul. To me, it would only make sense that we must share one. That was why Midoriko came to me. She appeared because I was in need, and I was desperately trying to win a battle against evil - much like she was in her time. My soul called out to her. And, once I discovered it was your soul I was touching, it all made sense. Doesn’t it to you?”

“Not at all.” Kagome slowly shook her head. “I’ve gotta admit, this is a lot to chew. I’m a bit winded right now, Kikyo.”

“Try to keep up.”

“Believe me, I am. You’re kind of info-dumping on me, though.”

“Look, I’d considered giving you everything little-by-little, but I don’t think we have that sort of time on our side. Naraku’s only getting stronger, and sooner or later, he’s going to know about you. So long as I’m alive, his focus is on me. He has a nasty tendency to obsess, and I currently have his undivided attention. I want it to stay that way. But, you’re getting stronger, too. You’re improving at a rate I had never expected, so I can hear the clock ticking.”

“Is that bad?”

“Yes and no. You’re doing better than I had thought you would. You’re doing exactly as I asked of you. It’s attention-grabbing, though. That’s sort of inevitable; don’t think you’re doing wrong. I’m just concerned, so I decided it would be best to tell you everything at once. You deserve to understand it all; and I recognize I should have tried to trickle all this information in with each telepathic visit I made to you. It was just - it was hard. When I first connected, I didn’t understand that I had. It was sort of like an ember struggling to catch flame. You know how it’ll flicker in and out? That was my connection with you at first. Finally, when I managed to step through, I barely had enough time to say, ‘The responsibility is ours.’ For the longest time, that’s all I was ever able to get out to you. It was frustrating.”

“You mean, that wasn’t intentional?” Kagome arched a brow, frowning.

“No, of course not.”

“Why is that the first thing you’d say to her, anyway?” Inuyasha asked quizzically, unintentionally and unknowingly matching Kagome’s expression. “Have you ever tried, ‘hello’?”

“I was invading her mind, Inuyasha. If the only thing I was able to say was, ‘hello’, even I would feel creeped out.” Kikyo replied.

“Alright, but alternatively speaking, if you had enough time to say, ‘the responsibility is ours’, then you had enough time to say, ‘hey, my name’s Kikyo.’”

“Pleasantries aren’t my strong suit. I prefer to get straight to the point.”

Both Inuyasha and Kagome went silent, pursing their lips, still unconsciously wearing matching expressions.

Kikyo grimaced, reading the signal on their faces. “I am aware that I didn’t. It wasn’t exactly my fault, though.”

“No, you’re right. It makes better sense now.”

“I soon realized it was our physical distance that was making communication troubling. While I had discovered the method to slip into your mind, it wasn’t something I could become proficient at so quickly. I had to use the strength of our connection as a guide, and the closer I got to you, the stronger it all became.”

“Right. You began giving me bits and pieces of Naraku. Everything was mysteriously vague, but I understand why now.”

“I just didn’t know how much was too much. I was being overly cautious for the both of us.”

There was a reprieve of silence between the three of them for a moment. It was noticeably thick, uncomfortable. Kagome was missing a huge chunk of information that was going to nag at her brain unless she received something to go off of. “So,” She began. “Midoriko… What makes you so sure?”

“Nothing. I’m not one-hundred percent positive we are actually her reincarnated soul. I can see how it’d be farfetched, and Inuyasha’s expression is practically screaming so.” Kikyo responded.

“Well, I’ve heard of reincarnation, but I’ve never heard of a split soul.” He said, shrugging carelessly as if he didn’t care how offensive his scowl appeared.

“I have. It’s rare, but it can happen. Particularly to a wise or powerful soul. One who’s traveled through a number of vessels and is too strong to be properly contained in a single one anymore.” Kikyo stated. “Midoriko had a defined strength that wasn’t all self-taught. She was a priestess born with experience. Her soul was intended to be a savior, because it was derived from countless, brave spirits before her.”

“And, she told you this?” Inuyasha asked, cocking a brow in skepticism.

“Of course, not.” Kikyo had almost rolled her eyes. “I wish she had so that I had definitive reason, but instead I have to go off of intuition. If it is true, if my soul came from Midoriko, then this unwavering belief isn’t incorrect. This connection I feel to her makes sense. Kagome, do you feel it too?”

“Well, I’m not sure.” She half frowned. “When papa mentioned Midoriko, I felt an undeniable interest toward her, that’s for sure. I just figured it was because she was a lot like me, and I’d never met another conjurer. At the time, I was probably ten or eleven, so I couldn’t help but want to know more about her. You know, curiosity of a kid and all. It was probably the only reason Miroku entertained the idea to seek out more information, and we snuck out of our house, borrowed my friend’s demon cat to take us, and broke into a library in another town. We really didn’t find too much on her, either. It was pretty anticlimactic, to be honest. I remember being extremely disappointed that I didn’t find a well-written biography on her like you would basic philosophers, but knowing the stigma on our kind in modern days, it sort of made sense. But, ever since, Midoriko has rarely crossed my mind.”

“Kagome, I’m the same. The difference is, when I discovered I was a conjurer, it wasn’t so detrimental to keep to ourselves. I did as much research as I could, while I could, and found little mentions of her, along with a few other names I can’t remember to this day. Midoriko stood out to me just the same, but I thought of her few times between then and the time she’d come to me. It was in that moment that I felt a deep connection to her. Maybe -“ Kikyo’s brows furrowed as an idea crossed her mind. “Maybe it was because she’d touched me, in a sense. I felt engulfed by her warm spirit. Please, may I try something?”

Kagome watched Kikyo take a few steps forward. She felt no reason to deny her request so she slipped her hand from Inuyasha’s feeble grip, slowly freeing one finger at a time as she walked forward. Kikyo raised her hand before her and Kagome apprehensively pressed her palm flat against hers. Awkward, quiet moments passed, and it was nothing short of uneventful. While Kagome was initially nervous to see what would happen, everything just sort of fell short. She had even noticed Kikyo’s nose sort of wrinkle disappointedly.

“I’ve got nothing.” Kagome mentioned, pursing her lips.

“Me too. I wonder why she told me to find you, then. What could possibly be the reason for our connection?” Kikyo said, almost troubled. It was perplexing, and she absolutely hated unsolved mysteries. “Unless, it isn’t as simple as merely touching to confirm or deny.”

“I’m not sure. Maybe we aren’t meant to know.”

“That is what I fear.” The older conjurer sighed, adjusting her palm to face upward and hold Kagome’s in a minor gesture of appreciation. While she was avidly discomfited by her inconclusive hypothesis, she’d still managed to explain every crucial detail she’d been withholding from Kagome. Their meeting was coming to an end. There was nothing more to say but goodbye. Respectfully, Kikyo placed her other hand over the top of Kagome’s, enclosing it in her warmth.

Kagome smiled. She was afraid with how pale Kikyo appeared that her blood ran cold and tired. It was pleasant and reassuring to know she was wrong. Returning the kindness, she gently placed her palm on top of Kikyo’s, both of their hands now touching.

Kagome’s heart jolted. Her abdomen tensed. All external sounds were muted. And, the world immediately went dark.

Kikyo was holding her hands tighter than even she was, nearly trembling as at least a dozen women, mass amounts of demons, blazing fire, and a powerful, swirling aura of lavender appeared around them while they stood in the middle of a pitch black orb. It was like an overwhelming sequence of events were playing without pause, thrusting into their minds so quickly that if you blinked, you’d risk missing something important. It was hard to determine relevance, though. Who were these women? Kagome had never seen a single one in her life. They all fought valiantly, each of them with their own unique weapon to fend off their enemies. So desperately, Kagome wanted to ask Kikyo if she was okay, ask her if she knew what was going on, but the two of them were struck stiff, mouths hanging agape.

The demons were wild, frenzied, and furious, slithering in the dark sky, some even flying through Kagome and Kikyo as if they were transparent. The lavender aura forcefully collided with the bleak grounds like storming tidal waves, crashing, receding, rising, and flooding. Sequentially, the women fought from left to right. Each one killed their significant foe, but was brought down by them, as well. Their final move was to look to the next woman, as if passing their duties along. Always, the next woman seemed more determined, more powerful, but no matter the strength in their resolve, their enemies always succeeded in dragging them down with them.

It was by the third that Kagome realized they were conjurers. The purple cascading around she and Kikyo was the same energy she could see when she saturated her arrows with her power. This was a history of legends they were witnessing, each one stronger than the last but still brought to their knees in a puddle of blood. By the last, she faced an enemy with no fear written in her eyes. She wore a stoic expression, armor decorating her torso, a sword on her hip, a bow and arrow in her hands, redefining the meaning of what it was to be a female warrior. Her battle was gruesome, hard to watch but harder to look away from. In the end, she killed her enemy, but bled from a deep wound in her chest.

Her dark eyes turned to she and Kikyo, and in a way to communicate, Kikyo squeezed Kagome’s hands twice, her gaze widening. It was as if she knew who that was. She seemed simultaneously in awe and stunned, and the gasp she’d inadvertently reacted with was clutched captive in her inflated chest. Kagome watched the woman, the final conjurer, limp toward them, blood oozing from her rustic armor, dripping down her leather pants and along the floor. She raised her trembling hands, curling her fingers in a motion that would typically usher them forward, but instead of the two girls moving, their naked spirits stepped from their bodies.

No longer could Kagome breathe. She wasn’t even sure if she was blinking anymore. Before her, she was looking at her raw self. It was a vaporous version, glowing vibrantly white with wispy hues of red swirling about. Her spirit looked back at her with a bright, confident smile, then spun back around to the legendary woman. Kikyo’s spirit was different. It stood tall and bold, much like her current demeanor, but a kind, small smile pushed at her lips when she regarded her own vessel for a moment longer. Kagome could see the tears brimming in the real Kikyo’s eyes, she could physically feel that though the gesture so small, it was revealing a true sweetness Kikyo hadn’t felt within herself in far too long, repressed beneath rubble of heartache and resentment. It was radiant white with smokey clouds of blue tufting about, her long, translucent hair billowing around her like their spirts were held under a body of water.

The dying conjurer, shaking horribly, smiled so sincerely as her last, living act, and as her body fell backwards to the ground, her own spirit stepped out. It was pure white, so saturated it was nearly solid, with flecks of every aura color swiftly whirling around her untouchable body. She extended both hands out to each woman, patient, compassionate, and understanding of the hesitation even their spirits harbored. At the same time, Kagome’s and Kikyo’s vaporous selves reached forward and took the woman’s hands, and in the next second, she split into uneven portions and merged with their bodies, shooting their spirits back within their vessels to return to consciousness.

Kagome blinked her dry eyes, refocusing them as she tried to regain her bearings. Her sights were on their still-grasped hands, and beneath that was the forest floor, twigs and pinecones, dirt and weeds, their legs, their boots. She could hear the breeze, the rustling leaves of the treetops above them, an urgent Inuyasha calling her name. With an exhale, she looked up into Kikyo’s eyes, the both of them holding the same, baffled expression.

As soon as they’d fully registered what they’d just experienced, both women yanked their hands away from each other, hurriedly stumbling back and away from the other to prevent another potential, terrifying vision. Kagome collided with Inuyasha’s chest and his arms instantly grabbed her waist, steadying her as he spoke anxiously.

“Are you okay? What happened, kid?”

She couldn’t answer immediately. Not even Kikyo tried to speak. The both of them looked insanely bewildered, eyes directed right at each other. Inuyasha had tried to pull Kagome away, had tried to reach her, but the opposite conjurer’s creepy, flying snake got in the way and refused to let him near. As much as he wanted to kill the damn thing for stopping him from getting close to Kagome, he figured so long as she was standing, breathing, and generally okay, he’d wait out whatever the fuck was happening.

“Hey - uh - Kikyo?” Kagome finally spoke, albeit waveringly.

“Yeah?” Her tone nearly matched.

“What the fuck was that?”

“I don’t know. I hadn’t anticipated it.”

“Was that -“

“Yeah. That was Midoriko.”

Her jaw dropped just a little further, her brow crinkling, perplexed. “Oh. Okay. Alright.” She replied shakily.

“That wasn’t…” Things were progressively processing for Kikyo, her eyebrows pinching together to create lines in between. Caramel eyes shifted to the side, her teeth gnawing at her bottom lip momentarily. “That wasn’t an even division.”

“No, it wasn’t.” Kagome commented lightly.

“No wonder…” Kikyo breathed. “No wonder. It makes so much sense now. I don’t just lack the heart, but I’ve always lacked the true power. I’ve been giving it my all for so long, and while I’ve made a dent, that’s all I’ve managed. I get it now. I’m truly not strong enough in more ways than one.”

“Wait, I’m confused.” Kagome said.

“So am I.” Inuyasha joined, still holding his companion’s sides while finding it necessary to remind them that he was there. He still had no idea what had just occurred and no one had given a single context clue to inform him of a goddamn thing yet. Kagome turned her head to regard him slightly, but he could tell by her unsteady glance that she couldn’t give him an immediate recap. Not yet.

“You mean to tell me, you didn’t know?”

“Know what? That it wasn’t a fifty-fifty division?”

“Yeah.”

“No. I had no way to confirm that up until now.”

“But, you’d said you were the distraction while I was the weapon. You’d said I was meant to be stronger than you. With what we just saw, I’d assumed that’s what you were referring to.”

“Kagome, I said that simply because I could not do it. To me, that’s what it felt like. I do not have it in me to kill Naraku, and Midoriko told me you were vital to the mission. My assumption was what I’d told you. I keep his attention until you’re ready, I do everything I can to weaken him, and then you’ll complete the task.”

“I’m going to assume you guys got some sort of answer pertaining to being Midoriko’s reincarnations. So, if Kikyo was right and it’s the both of you, what the hell do you mean it isn’t fifty-fifty?” Inuyasha asked, stepping to stand at Kagome’s side as soon as she seemed stable.

“It’s more like seventy-thirty.” Kikyo stated.

“And, who got what?”

“I think you already know the answer to that.” She replied.

“But, what do you mean it makes sense to you? I don’t understand. Aren’t you extremely powerful? You’re able to pull off dark conjurings without your heart being tainted; I don’t feel any darkness coming from you.” Kagome said, sounding sort of flustered and rushed to comprehend Kikyo’s position. “You’ve gotta be stronger than you’re giving yourself credit for. Just because you lack the moral justifications to kill your ex-lover doesn’t make you weak! It makes you passionate!”

“No, Kagome. What I’m saying is, I’m not as strong as I thought I was supposed to be. I kept pushing myself to my limits time and time again but all it felt like I was doing was hurting myself. I thought if I had at least fifty percent of Midoriko’s soul in me on top of my own, then that was more than enough to take down Naraku, but my heart was never there. So, then I considered that maybe it was because I didn’t receive Midoriko’s resoluteness. Maybe it was because I was her brain and you were her heart, so together we would be unstoppable.

“It’s been so long, Kagome. I’ve been giving more of me to this mission than my body can handle. I’ve been sick for years. My shinidamachu keeps me alive with the souls of deceased women, but I can feel the thread I’m hanging on by. I am convinced that if I had not figured out how to call this spirit of the underworld to me, I would have died long ago. I am not using dark magic correctly, and it’s further taking from my light. You may not feel the darkness coming from me, and I believe that’s because that part of Midoriko mutes it, but I certainly do. It’s minimal, but with what’s left of me, it’s substantial. It’s like a congested battle raging within my chest. Do you understand now? Do you get it?” Kikyo, though tearing up sorrowfully, smiled in such a manner of relief. How long had she spent admonishing herself? How long had she cursed herself for thinking she had more in her than she could spare? How many times had she vomited the contents of her stomach out, been reduced to fevers, aches, and profuse sweating? Her expectations on herself weren’t just high because she felt that piece of Midoriko inside of her, but also because she felt the crushing weight of guilt for being partially responsible for Naraku. And, by using dark magic to call to Kagome, to save the life of her sister, to try and stay alive herself, she was unconsciously hastening the pace of her own demise.

Everything clicked. Everything was lining up now. Kagome was key because Kagome not only had the majority of Midoriko’s power, but her own soul, her compassion, her heart was not impaled by darkness. Even with the pain she’s experienced, the trauma that still eats away at her, that reappears whenever a trigger she can rarely identify beforehand causes her to quake, even with the loss, the apathy, the cold moments at night when she questioned if she even believed in a higher power anymore, Kagome avidly held tight to who she truly was. At the end of the day, there was no sense in trying to control what had happened, there was no use in attempting to reverse what had already come to fruition. While it has, in fact, fazed her, it hasn’t changed her negatively. It’s taken so much effort, so much resilience to resist the pull to let it take her, and sometimes smiling took more endeavor than she felt flowing through her veins, but she still stood up. It didn’t matter if Kagome was sobbing, was crashing and burning, was quivering and exhausted. She would cry while she maneuvered her legs beneath her body and pushed herself to stand. The darkness has touched her heart, yes. Whose heart hasn’t it touched in this day and age? What was important was that she fought it back. She physically pushed the darkness away like it was men impeding on her territory. She cried to release that anger and resentment, she yelled to release that heat and vexation, and she never gave up. Never did she leave the battlefield unscathed, but the scar tissue that had formed was what helped her become who she is right here and now. Because, her hardened heart was like a shell that protected the light within.

How could Kikyo not crumble under the pressure she’d been under? How could her eyes ever glimmer with hope when she’d had to willingly forfeit the one person she loved unconditionally all due to a person she’d mistakenly given too much of her heart to? He’d tricked her into trusting him, into caring for him, and repaid her with violence, grief, and taunting laughter. As if inflicting pain on her was an easy task. Even Kagome would be broken if someone she trusted her heart with treated it as an invaluable object, dropping it to the floor and stepping all over it with heavy boots. It was betrayal at its finest.

She was seventeen when they’d met. He’d groomed her. He’d gotten lucky with his pick of young, vulnerable women and groomed her to his liking, but when she finally resisted, he turned on her like she meant nothing. Kagome couldn’t blame Kikyo, and although she persisted, although she squared her shoulders and fought tooth and nail, Kagome understood why her brown eyes were dull and lifeless, and her skin was ghostly white.

Feeling like she was supposed to be capable of so much more, Kikyo had learned to feel unwell about herself. If Kagome were in her position, she couldn’t imagine being comfortable in her own skin. Just recently, she’d struggled with that exact thing, but it wasn’t nearly on the same level as Kikyo’s anguish. It was horrible imagining the burdens sitting on her shoulders, like cinderblocks pulling them down while she pleaded with herself to shrug it off and stand up straight. Kagome wondered if even she’d be able to overcome all that Kikyo had been through.

Everyone’s story was different. Everyone’s strengths and weaknesses were unique. It didn’t make you bigger or smaller than the person to your left. Everyone handled things their own way, and everyone had their breaking point. But, Kikyo’s smile right now was both the saddest and most joyful thing Kagome had ever witnessed from her. It was like some of that weight was finally lifting, some of those insults she’d thrown at herself were finally dissipating, some of the pressure was releasing and all it took was a little bit of clarity.

“It’s conflicting, you know?” Kikyo breathed. “I still have a long way to go. I still have to fight, and I still have to face Naraku. But, it’s liberating to see that my limitations cannot exceed what they are. I don’t have to push myself for the impossible anymore. I cannot rest, but at the same time, it feels like I already am.”

She wouldn’t have to be so forceful on herself from this point forward. Kikyo was giving this fight her all, and she could be at peace with what she had to give now. It was enough. It was more than enough.

“Naraku…” Kagome started. “When was the last time you saw him, Kikyo?”

The conjurer inhaled and exhaled slowly, sucking in her bottom lip as she pondered. “Maybe a couple of years ago. I’ve face his puppets, and some of his personal creations, but him in the flesh? It’s been a while.”

“You haven’t seen him?”

“He wont face me, himself.”

“Maybe because he can’t.” Inuyasha said. “I’m not trying to level with him, and I want to preface this with the fact that I still think he’s a fucking creep, but maybe this is a sign that, much like you, it’s difficult to be the hand that strikes.”

“That is not comforting.” Kikyo admitted, caramel eyes shying downward. “I do not want to think about him loving me. It’s disgusting.”

“That’s fine. Don’t. That doesn’t change the reality of it all. This tells me that you might be his weakness.”

“I am only his weakness because I am a conjurer.”

It wasn’t right to argue with Kikyo right now. It was clearly distressing for her to consider the plausibility of the situation, so Inuyasha shut his mouth, glancing down at Kagome as she regarded him just the same. He could see it in her eyes, too. She felt similarly. Even without knowing Naraku’s recent side of things, she was contemplating the potentiality of what Inuyasha had claimed.

“If you don’t mind, would you keep Kaede out of this?” Kikyo asked, and although she hadn’t looked up, it was clear that she was more talking to Inuyasha.

“Kikyo, I don’t know if I can make that promise.” He stated honestly. He wasn’t harsh, he wasn’t defensive, he was simply replying with honorable intentions.

“Please?” She nearly faltered, clutching her fists at her side as she bowed her head from view.

“I understand why you did it initially, but Kaede isn’t a child anymore. She should have the right to her own freewill, and that includes choosing to know the truth of what happened. I don’t believe she needs sheltering, and she’ll be the first to tell you that.”

“I don’t want her involved.”

“She already is. She was the moment your home was attacked, and the moment you took her eye.”

“But -“

“I get it, Kikyo. I do. I’m not trying to be thoughtless. But, one thing I need you to remember is I’m not on your side. We have nothing more than a mutual understanding and a mutual interest, but you and I are indifferent toward each other. Am I wrong?”

“No, but that’s my sister. That’s my baby sister, Inuyasha.” She declared powerfully, shooting her bleary gaze up at him. “I reserve the right to decide what’s best for her, because no one would know better than I.”

Inuyasha gave a simple shake of his head, and still his expression held no malice. “You gave up that right. You gave up that right the moment you faked your death and left her alone. I know that stings, and I’m really not intending to come off carelessly, but that’s the truth. The version of Kaede in your mind is still that fifteen year old girl, isn’t it? The young teenager she was just before Naraku attacked, right? Well, she’s actually in her mid twenties now. Kaede is an adult, so even if you hadn’t left, that right would still belong solely to her. I’m going to bring it up, Kikyo. I’m going to give Kaede the choice of knowing what actually happened so long ago.”

“Kagome.” She urgently tried, reaching for the opposite conjurer to convince the hanyou otherwise. Kagome’s sights had shied to the ground, hugging her arm inward as she allowed them to talk one-to-one, but she glanced upward now, a small frown marring her features. Kikyo could see it immediately. She could read the look as well as if the expression were written in text, and her chin quivered in response. “Kagome, please.”

“I’m sorry.” Kagome spoke softly, kindly. “Even if I did agree with you, Inuyasha��s right. Kaede deserves to know. She doesn’t need protection, she would be upset if we treated her that way, and truthfully, it would be inappropriate to sit on information like this. The way I see it is, out of the three of us, Inuyasha’s the closest to her -”

“That’s not true.” Kikyo interjected.

“She doesn’t know you’re alive, Kikyo. She will always love you, and you will always love her, but it is true. At this point, you have no connection to her outside of your bloodline. Inuyasha is her friend, and they trust each other. He isn’t bringing it up to disrespect you. He’s bringing it up out of respect for her.”

“You really wont budge?” Kikyo asked, and it was inconclusive as to who that question was directed to. Just in case, both Kagome and Inuyasha shook their heads in reply. “Then, will you please pass along a message? Tell her I don’t want her looking for me. Tell her I will come to her when all is done. Tell her I’m sorry.”

“I can do that.” Inuyasha agreed.

Kikyo could only manage to regard them both with small glances after that. Justifiably, she was upset, but she appeared too physically drained to outwardly react as such.

“Take care of yourself.” She quietly said to Kagome before turning around on her heel and heading off through the trees, her soul collector swirling in the air just behind her.

“You too.” Kagome whispered.

The breeze was the only sound passing around them now, filling the silence as Inuyasha and Kagome were once more alone with one another. It had been moments since Kikyo walked away, and it was sort of like they couldn’t just go back to the way things were before she’d appeared. There was too much to sort through, too many emotions had emerged in that time, and now they were left standing in dense waters.

With a synchronous and guttural sigh from the both of them, Kagome and Inuyasha made their ways down to their butts. They didn’t bother with finding a rock or log to sit on, didn’t bother finding a different location, because moving further right now was simply impossible. So, they made themselves comfortable and promptly sat where they once stood, closing their eyes in defeat as they mulled over the series of events.

“That was exhausting.” Kagome half-whined, crossing her legs and burying her face in her hands.

“Oh, she’s -“ Inuyasha rubbed his forehead, pushing the hair from his face briefly. “She’s a piece of work.”

The two looked at each other. Their tired, concerned expressions shifting to defeated smiles as they sort of just started laughing.

“So, what do you want to do?” She asked, leaning back on her hands. “You want to head back to Kaede’s? We’re not all that far.”

“I’m not sure yet. I can’t make that split-second decision considering the circumstances. Let me think on it for a moment.” He wagered. “In the meantime…”

Though there was no end to that sentence, Kagome could easily grasp what he was looking for. He wanted an explanation. She had to commend him for his patience. On his end, how did everything look? Did she just stand there motionless, or did it seem like something was wrong? If she were in his position, it would have driven her insane not knowing what was going on and then, thereafter, having to wait for any sort of detail to piece it all together.

“I saw Midoriko.” She started. “Actually, I saw all the successors before her, too. At least, that’s what I’m guessing. None of them spoke directly to us. It was more like we were watching the endings of each of their lives, how they fought, how they died, who was responsible, and then their spirit joined with the next person. There was about twelve, and they all died in battle. By the time Midoriko died, her soul was nearly solid. I saw my soul, too. It was - it was weird.”

“I can imagine.” His brows had furrowed, turning his body to fully face hers now. “You guys came out of that looking like you’d seen a ghost, so I guess that makes sense.”

“It was crazy, Inuyasha.” She exclaimed. “Demons were everywhere, it was so dark, and it was like an all out war that we were standing in the middle of. Midoriko pulled our souls from our bodies and joined them, and that’s when we came back.”

“So, seventy-thirty?”

“Yeah.” Her voice dropped. “Something like that.”

“Still shocked you can blow an entire field away now?”

“Honestly, yeah. Everything’s just so surreal right now, it’s hard to think this isn’t made up.” Kagome’s eyes fell to his legs, following the sewn pattern on the hem of his pants to distract herself. “I’m the reincarnation of someone. It doesn’t feel right to say that. Suddenly, it’s like it’s not just me in here. I watched her merge a huge portion of her soul with mine, so that tells me she’s just part of me, but thinking about it feels weird. It’s hard to explain. I just don’t know what to think or how to feel right now.”

“What, are you having an identity crisis? Kid, it doesn’t matter if you’re the reincarnation of someone. You didn’t inherit their personality traits or their thinking patterns. I’m willing to bet you didn’t even inherit their looks, because if that were true, you and Kikyo would look more similar. As far as I saw, the only thing you two had in common was hair color, and even that wasn’t an exact match. What you inherited was strength, and it’s not even a birth right. It’s more like grand potential. You still have to work your ass off to get it, but the chance is there. Your decisions, your actions, your morals, that’s all you. Your tastes, your style, your brain, your heart, that’s you too. Overall, you’re Kagome. You’ve always been Kagome, and you always will be. Now, you just have a bit more to back up your resolve. You know that your individual strength will be supported by a… generator of sorts.” Inuyasha chuckled.

He’d managed to get her to crack a smile. Kagome couldn’t tell if he was bullshitting her to make her feel better, or if he truly believed what he said. He was incredibly honest, though, so she couldn’t help but want to take his word for it and find comfort in it all. Either way, she appreciated his quick wit.

There was still something pulling on her heart. It wasn’t about Midoriko, it wasn’t the fact that she’d just witnessed the reenactment of twelve gory deaths, it was about Kikyo. She was pale with such deep under eye circles because she’d been killing herself. She’d believed for so long that she was supposed to be stronger, and for years she stretched her boundaries thin and her resources dry. All to the point where she had to rely on lost souls of dead women to keep some sort of force in her body. And, still, her battle raged on. Everything she’d said after the revelation was so depressing but seeped from her mouth as if it were relieving, and Kagome had a hard time understanding the solace behind it all.

“Kikyo,” She whispered. “Do you think she’s going to be okay?”

“I’m not worried about her.” He replied, his voice low and soothing.

“But, you heard her. She was sick.”

“Because she didn’t know her limits. Now she does.” Inuyasha leaned forward a bit. He didn’t like the sadness on Kagome’s face, and while he praised her empathy, he wanted to fight it off at the same time. It wasn’t allowed to make her head hang low, it wasn’t allowed to drain her as if the other conjurer’s ailments were her own. “Just like you have to learn your restrictions and understand how to properly use your powers, so does she. Now, she has insight she didn’t have before. Now, she knows that if she doesn’t back off, she’ll get too sick to keep going. Kikyo was under the impression that she needed to work harder to reach her maximum potential, but it was counterintuitive because she was depleting her life source. Now, if she respects her body and her abilities properly, she’ll be able to get healthy again. Then, she’ll be the force to be reckoned with that she was reaching for.”

“The dark magic she’s been using… the effects of it wont go away just like that, though.”

“That’s something she’s going to have to deal with, kid. You win some, you lose some, but she knew what she was doing when she made that choice. She didn’t look like she was having a pity party, so don’t feel like you need to feel bad for her.”

“But, I do. All of this is - it’s becoming so much more real than it was before. I didn’t know it could, but it has. It’s scary.” She locked eyes with the hanyou. “I’m scared.”

Inuyasha couldn’t stop himself. Kagome didn’t look sad or hurt, she didn’t look small or timid, she didn’t even look defeated. She neither trembled nor cried. She just spoke her truth. She told him how she felt, and fear was always a deeper emotion that was hard for anyone to come forward with. Unless it was an involuntary scream given in reaction to a jump scare or a fall, fear was something so often pushed back and hidden behind scowls and broadened shoulders. And, he appreciated being trusted with it. So, he couldn’t stop himself from reaching forward. His fingers tenderly pushed longer strands of her dark hair behind her ear, repeating the motion soothingly while he slipped in soft touches to caress her cheek before gently, so gently, cradling her jaw.

“I know you are. But, you’re safe.” He said, his tone husky.

Kagome leaned into his touch, nodding and sighing out. Her shoulders relaxed some and her brown eyes closed momentarily while she relished in the peace he provided.

“You still know I don’t expect you to protect me, right?” She mentioned quietly, glancing up at his amber eyes. He hadn’t wavered. Inuyasha didn’t pull away, didn’t look away, his expression remaining soft but noble. His fingers curled around the back of her neck and he pulled her closer an inch, his soothing scent washing over her.

“Who said anything about feeling obligated?”

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