#it's just such a specific intersection of two things i'm very into right now

[thedressagedraft]

The collector gremlin in my brain *really* wants me to buy the Neopets tarot deck. I am trying not to give in right now but...we'll see 🙈

[iridescentmirrorsgenshin]

Kaveh is like this close to committing a sin with Mehrak, like he's playing a really dangerous game. It's just a matter of time Mehrak gets even more sentient when it's already this far. I know Kaveh keeps it in check, but man... I hope they'll talk about this one day. Either that or Kaveh will always brush it off, as if he didn't get some ancient core to build it??? Also, I always love your thoughts, thanks for loving these two so much!

hiya! thank you for your ask! i'm so glad you enjoy my posts :") <3 Mehrak���s existence is so ??? funny to me. we have tighnari’s story quest detailing the akademiya’s ban on research into mechanical lifeforms, directly alongside kaveh building his own mechanical lifeform and parading it around, sending it on solo coffee retrieving missions whilst everyone in sumeru looks on smiling <3

Mehrak’s legality hasn’t been mentioned at all in-game as of now, and as it’s been used consistently, both in kaveh’s hangout, a parade of providence, and now nahida’s birthday event, with not one mention of legality or potential trespasses, makes it seem that that’s how things will stay - especially since Cyno has met/is aware of mehrak’s existence during the battle scene during a parade of providence (then again, cyno did meet the wanderer during this event, and yet in nahida’s birthday event it seems he’s only HEARD of the wanderer through sethos??) but even then, since Cyno trusts Tighnari with karkata’s continued existence, it’s likely not a stretch to say that to Cyno, Kaveh can be trusted with Mehrak’s existence (it’s all very iffy)

Mehrak’s existence, overall, has had little focus other than its usage in battle, its official introduction in a parade of providence, where kaveh stipulates it has low intelligence, and was built to assist him, as well as being incapable of talking back and giving him ‘attitude’ (implicitly comparing mehrak to alhaitham), and in kaveh’s hangout when he works on designing a building. It’s only in recent events, such as cyno’s second story quest, and now in nahida’s birthday event, that mehrak has gotten more mentions, and now a spotlight, which is all in relation to coffee, tying back to alhaitham and kaveh’s improved relationship (the coffee analysis will be in the updated essay finally!!). as of right now, overall, mehrak doesn’t appear to be a major focus

It might be strange for the game to mention now that mehrak has been an illegal creation all this time, unless it’s a significant plot point that has to be resolved, but if mehrak is further explored, like in the temple of silence for example (hoyoverse I am once again asking), then perhaps this collective ignoring of a crime occurring will be explained away, if mentioned at all? It’s interesting that tighnari says it might be possible that this ban is reversed in the future, but as for whether that will actually happen, and the implications of this, aren’t clear

Mehrak’s accepted existence in general poses so many questions. I’m interested in the specifics of the ban, like does it depend on the autonomy of the machine in question? Abattouy aimed to make Karkata essentially human, capable of individual thought, processing, emotion, and conversation, which definitively broaches on the intersection of mechanical and biological life which caused the Akademiya to ban this type of research in the first place. So if a machine is able to act on its own, irrespective of human interference, then this is what the akademiya would want to prevent

In mehrak’s case, it’s unclear as to what its limits are, but from what has been shown so far, it seems that mehrak can only act on kaveh’s commands and when held in battle – it’s uncertain rn whether mehrak can act independently of this, but as kaveh invented it to only assist in certain matters, it’s doubtful. But then again, we don’t have a great scope of whether it can experience emotions, as it has shown signs of being distressed in a parade of providence when kaveh states that it can’t talk back, and when being scolded by kaveh in nahida’s birthday event

if mehrak has limited intelligence, it's interesting to compare mehrak with karkata. abattouy was attempting to make karkata understand human language, and be able to respond in order to have conversation, which was proved impossible, whereas although mehrak only speaks in beeps, kaveh is shown to have a thorough understanding of what it’s saying? Mehrak can be programmed to recognise people’s voices, but seemingly also language, as mehrak can obey spoken command, which is what abattouy tried to accomplish but was unable to with modern technology.

Mehrak, on the other hand, understands kaveh’s basic requests – which is made even funnier in kaveh’s old sketchbook, where he says that more than anything he really wants mehrak to understand what he’s saying. he got his wish but at what cost???

Mehrak being made from ancient technology, belonging to that of king deshret’s civilisation, offers many interesting paths that could be explored in future events, as besides the primal constructs roaming around, the puzzles in the desert, and now the temple of silence, no technology really exists from that time. Someone commented that mehrak’s presence in nahida’s birthday event, in conjunction with the event being based around ancient technology with the wedjat eye, could be highlighting mehrak’s irregularity in modern day sumeru – potentially foreshadowing for a future event that could further expand upon mehrak? If this is the case, I am all for it, there are so many questions concerning kaveh’s little light <3

[mellxncollie]

Temporary pause from working on a Charles' cricket bat gifset to talk about this shot:

It's such a well composed shot! It's the most badass cricket bat moment and this is like the anime-styled, matrix-level, critical hit, crescendo moment for Charles after all of his anger in episodes 3-5, and now he's redirecting it in a way that is no longer terrifying to his friends but supportive (though i would argue most of his anger in eps 3-5 was still very justified).

The negative space here is just *chefs kiss* and gives space for Charles to be focused on. It's simple and uncomplicated, making it easy for us to digest just how badass Charles is.

But like, look at it overlaid with some common composition 'rules'

Rule of Thirds

We've got him fairly well-aligned with the rule of thirds, his body and arm mostly along the lines with the cricket bat ending around that intersection

Then, similar to the rule of thirds, it fits even better with the Golden Ratio

This gets more along his center of gravity, and all that empty space on the sides just makes him even more important in the frame

These two rules, and the next one, are what makes it feel kind of "matrix"-like to me.

Golden Triangles

So maybe this doesn't look like it matches, and you'd be right. It doesn't match the lines of the composition exactly, but the golden triangles shows us that the shot is angled to somewhat align with this composition. Charles is parallel to those shorter lines, and the whole shot guides our eye along that long, downwards line.

If it was angled a little more or less dramatically, then it might not have had as much of an effect. This specific angle makes it feel so dynamic.

You can even use the Diagonal Composition that photoshop has (basically 2 square crosses that align with the 4 corners--with a smaller aspect ratio they'd overlap more)

Here the thing to note is the cricket bat's edge fitting almost too perfectly with that one line.

Golden Spiral (the one where i'm definitely stretching it a bit but whatever)

So this doesn't work as much in the full frame aspect ratio (2.2:1) but if we cut out the negative space, Charles fits along the larger part of the swooping arc. Not as much of a thing to focus on at the center of the spiral, but if we flip the spiral:

The cricket bat is in that spot. I know this is a bit of a stretch of the golden spiral, but all this to say, it's still really fucking cool.

All of these 'rules' aligning like this make it such a satisfying scene to watch. For me, when he catches that cricket bat it's like when a difficult math equation comes out to a whole number, or when a poem finds the perfect rhyme for the very last line, or when you're at the end of a whodunit and the detective lays out how the crime was committed. It's the best conclusion for an already amazing moment, everything falling perfectly into place.

[zahri-melitor]

Some more coherent thoughts about Gotham War, now it's settled on me.

(Spoilers below cut, for length and as it's still only Wednesday)

It's not a huge surprise, but Selina's whole 'train henches to steal from the rich non-violently!' ended up being a complete side issue that only existed to get the plot moving. Nobody's conception of this plot, in two years time, will really include this detail, despite the thousands of words spent arguing how ridiculous it was.

Yes it remains a poorly thought out plan on Selina's part (she's never heard of earning money legally) but the narrative also frames it as long term ineffective from the very first issue and knocks it down on multiple occasions.

DC editorial definitely tried to dress this up as a full family event, but realistically it was a Bruce, Selina and Jason event, written by their three current writers, with solid bit parts played by Tim and Dick.

Vandal Savage remains ridiculous and ready to sacrifice anyone and I appreciate that about him. As a villain he was just the right level of stakes for this event.

I enjoyed getting to see Scandal, even if her fans would say she got done dirty here. Scandal usually has enough sense not to believe anything Vandal says, and I admit I was somewhat waiting for some level of twist here as to why Scandal was all for immortality at this point in time, but it never came.

I still agree it felt a lot like three separate plotlines intersecting, but I think they managed to land the event successfully (while leaving some nice loose threads). I actually appreciate they didn't overreach in their goals.

It still finished out with two separate plotlines: Bruce and Selina and Jason; and Dick and Tim and the rest of the family. Structurally this again reminded me as much of Resurrection of Ra's Al Ghul as Batman #138 did; the main plot and then the far more interesting Dick & Tim sideplot which is what I go back to reread. (Chip Zdarsky is clearly also a fan)

Also promisingly for an event yes, it did actually shake up the status quo and push the participants off in new directions.

So Bruce is now doing the Loner Batman thing (in that he's locked out of the fam computers/comm lines), Selina is officially 'dead' (what is with all these fake dead people with titles, Penguin is too right now), and Jason has what's effectively permanent fear toxin response to stressful situations. Also, apparently, we are getting Dick and Barbara back 'running' the Batfam while Bruce is on the outs.

As far as Bruce goes, what has been really notable in this event is how much Chip Zdarsky loves early 2000s Bat comics and their dynamics, and particularly Joker's Last Laugh. There's a lot of structural things about how this event was shaped, what specific characters did, and emotional beats that feel very JLL as someone who's read it at least half a dozen times. It's not the only influence, but it's a pretty prominent one.

Bruce ending the event in a position where he's effectively not working with most of the other Bats actually tracks reasonably well over to Batman & Robin, to my surprise. It makes sense that it's just Bruce and Damian and they're focusing on homelife and domestic relationship details between the two. It gives Bruce an excuse for why he's closely focused on Damian there.

I will admit I have not been reading Catwoman, but from the event it seems they're spinning her off to keep moving her back into a more antihero position. Tini Howard clearly has a direction she wants to take Selina.

I actually think this has pretty interesting storytelling potential for Jason. It means that he has to stay calm, or has to overcome his own fear to achieve things. It gives him a goal? Matthew Rosenberg clearly seems interested in using it for his Jason storytelling and he's got Jason right now, so...

I'm personally delighted by how much Tim Zdarsky wrote into this storyline. He used the space more to show off Dick and Tim's brotherhood and what Tim is good at, rather than push the Tim side of the Zur story we're all expecting to occur (there's that waiting Zur-Robin costume). Means he's planning it for Batman as a title itself rather than getting it tangled up here.

"It was the only way to become the second-best Robin". Yes, this is Tim getting to show off his core competencies - he probably is the only Bat other than Bruce who would have extensively studied all the trophies. Dick would remember a lot of them simply because a lot of the trophies are from old adventures, but pretty much all the others are not particularly retrospective, respect the past sort of members of the group, while Tim has always been surrounded by the shadows of the past. I loved this note.

I haven't talked about Babs yet! She's in green, in glasses, sitting down at her computers with a novelty mug, directing everyone, answering to Oracle. That's her! That's my Oracle!

I do think Bruce expecting Dick to take over running the Batfam right now is a big ask, given he's also running the Titans as the main superhero team on the planet and handling Bludhaven, but Tom Taylor's writing both those books so I don't expect to see the stress catching up with Dick there. Benefits of writer choice right now, I guess. Also personally 'Babs and Dick organise everyone while Bruce has a breakdown elsewhere' is one of my favourite Batfam dynamics so you know, I'm pretty excited if we actually get to see this play out.

New Lazarus Pit in Gotham! This won't be a problem at all.

[anarkittyuwuuniverse]

Okay so I didn't really want to get involved in the whole transfem transmasc discourse going on right now as I don't really belong to either of those groups but there are things that confuse me about it. I've been trying to listen to both perspectives and came to learn that people on the "transandrophobia side" tend to kinda blow the whole baedelism thing out of proportion as most people who identify with that label seem to just be transfemmes talking about transmisogyny and that's it, not exactly the transfemme version of TERFism that some people present it as. At the same time I'm seeing a lot of transfemmes arguing against the point that transfemmes as a group hold power over transmascs, which like, they very much don't but I also don't think I've seen any large numbers of transmascs arguing that to begin with? Am I just not looking in the right places? I've been scouring the posts in the transandrophobia tag for a bit trying to find anything and I found like maybe one or two guys who were clearly TERFs but not anything in huge numbers. I also keep seeing people say that transandrophobia is inherently an mra concept as it would imply that men are systematically oppressed but then I also see people define transandrophobia as an intersection between transphobia and *misogyny* specifically, which they obviously can't call *transmisogyny* as that would be kind of tasteless and taking terms away from transfemmes so like... Am I missing something? I hope people will understand that I'm asking in good faith here and not trying to instigate anything and I'm very much interested in listening to transfemme perspectives on all of this, I've just been feeling like I've been missing something about the posts I've seen about it thus far.

[euniexenoblade]

hey someone i follow has been posting stuff about transadrophobia/transmisandry and i get that the concept itself is wrong due to the nature of intersecting opression but there were some valid points made. for example how trans men are treated as neither men nor women depending on the context, such as in the case of male on male violence where they are seen as valid targets but then denied due to percived femininity. (there was some other stuff but i cant recall it right now)

do you have any advice (other than just to block them). im bad at nuanced analysis and could use some help. i want to be able to understand if what was being described was regular transphobia or an actual unique form of opression

-a transfem confused about the current situation

(p.s. sorry if this is impossible to read im quite stressed as this person is one of my favourite users and i want to have a nuanced perspective of the topic)

"how trans men are treated as neither men or women" is literally ripped right out of literature about transmisogyny. Trans women are seen as a lesser other that is neither men or women. Like, if they want to talk about that point fine but it's literally a concept that's existed and talked about for trans women for over a decade. So that would at least be "transphobia" and not "transandrophobia," because it's not remotely specific to their experience.

I'm not getting into a point by point with this, cuz I don't want to be involved in this stuff. But transandrophobia was coined by a dude who literally talked about getting off to lesbians being correctively raped and consistently was very lesbophobic. Nothorses cites literal terfs in his renditions of how "baeddels ruined the LGBT" (baeddels never had a strong following a died out years ago, the idea baeddels still exist is bullshit perpetuated by transphobes/transmisogynists/kiwifarms esque types, it's the mean bad tranny Boogeyman ("what do you mean Boogeyman is misgendering??? It's gender neutral!")).

At the end of the day, transandrophobia shit is terf propaganda with a few instances of real actual transphobia transmascs experience sprinkled in. I don't care about these dudes talking about their experiences, I honestly kinda don't care even if they have a specific term for it, but "transmisandry" was primarily used by racist mras and "transandrophobia" is a terf ideology.

These people are just talking about transphobia. They want some special term because they think "transmisogyny" is some special cool thing trans women get to have, they don't actually see it as an intersection of two oppressive axes. They're usually not well read about transmisogyny and don't actually know anything about it.

As for talking to this person. Idk. Could just approach it that the word transphobia already exists and that the first point I mentioned is literally a thing transfems go through. Tbh w you I wouldn't know what to do if my friends start posting that bigoted garbage.

[jemeryl]

Playing D&D helped me realize: other people think they can fuck with my boundaries for kicks.

In two totally separate D&D groups, another player had their character coerce and steal from my character. This made me uncomfortable, but I let it slide because it's just a game? What's the big deal, right?

In the first game, my character fell into a spike pit. The other player (K) sat on the edge and said he''d help me out if I gave hima valuable jewel I had. I thought, this is so fucking stupid, I will do whatever it takes to get out of this dumb fucking interaction right this moment.

In the second game, the other player (S) tried to persuade me to take The MacGuffin (the jewel from Critical Role: Netherdeep, if you know), because she doesn't feel worthy of the responsibility. So I said no a few times, but she insisted, and we were stuck arguing, so I thought, whatever, it's just a game, I'm bored, let's move on and sort it out later. But in the next session, S stole the amulet back off me for reasons known only to her?? It's a part of her character's story.

The fact that this happened twice, in completely separate groups, made me feel really unsettled. I didn't like what that said about me: that I attract people who'll violate my boundaries. And if I can't keep my boundaries during something as seemingly trivial as a D&D game, how can I keep my boundaries ANYwhere?

To answer this, I broke the question into three parts:

Why them?

Why me?

How do I stop this?

Why them?

There are other similarities that made it extra unsettling. K and S are both white, older than me, and less emotionally mature than me. They're both deeply insecure, anxious, neurodivergent people. (just like my mom! HMMM)

They both DMed for me for a long time, but they refused to take feedback about how to make their games more fun, so I dropped out of their games. They both felt very rejected by that, and both got kind of weird about it in different ways.

They're both A LOT as players: playing characters who act out and are annoying, taking up a lot of spotlight. Other players put up with their characters behaving badly because it's just a game and no one wants to raise a fuss.

They're really hard to communicate with. They ostensibly welcome feedback, thank you profusely for it, and tell you how much they value you as a player and a friend. However, they're actually shutting down because they feel so uncomfortable and rejected, so no further communication or growth can take place. Then, they shut down more and more over time in order to protect themselves from further discomfort (which they bring on themselves as they double down on what they were doing wrong, and I progressively lose my saint-like reservoir of patience).

I don't play ANY games with K any more because it's intolerable. I'm only playing with S now because the GM invited both of us, I'm invested in that game, and I hoped we wouldn't have an issue. Surprise, now we have an issue, and I need to nip it in the bud because the campaign I'm in with S is going long term.

Why Me?

In both cases, as a TWoC, I was the one in the room with the least social power.

I have experienced a lot of exclusion in the intersection of transphobia and racism - even in LGBT spaces. So I've been conditioned to people please and let things slide in order to avoid exclusion.

I'm giving out subconscious signals that they can get away with this kind of shit with me (signals I learned in order to survive my parents). And they're picking up on it and subconsciously doing it. I mean, I bet they never even CONSIDERED doing this to another player.

This shows they ARE capable of listening and respecting boundaries, but they know on some level there are no CONSEQUENCES for ignoring me and breaking my boundaries.

The good thing is: my signals were learned. I can unlearn them!

How can I stop this? (A Work in Progress)

So I'm going to be paying very, very close attention to what behaviors and signals I give in my interactions, specifically with strangers, because I REALLY, REALLY want to ensure I don't pick up a THIRD K or S. How can I weed these behaviours out?

And I'll be paying attention to signals OTHERS give. What SPECIFICALLY are their behaviors that tell me they are unsafe (which I was conditioned by my parents to disregard or even gravitate towards). What are the behaviours that I didn't realize I needed to say no to in the first place?

And, how can I PRE-EMPTIVELY put up a boundary with them? Let them know they can't target me, WHILE they're still working out who they can target?

Then, the next level: Pre-emptively put up a boundary that says, you can't mess with me OR any of my ACTUAL friends. So fuck off and don't even try.

[teawitch]

Friday the 13th and Freya (or Frigga)s Day

Why not being wrong doesn't exactly mean it's right.

So, the idea that Friday the 13th was associated with Freya (or Frigga) and therefore sacred for women is circulating again.

What if we take this apart for a kernel of truth. I'm going to leave the Patriarchy, the Catholic Church and the unlucky part out for a moment and just look at the Freya/Frigga part. (Even amoung the Norse crown, there doesn't seem to be full agreement about which goddess this refers to with some speculating it may have varied regionally. I'll leave it up to the Norse crowd to sort that out. For right now - we just need a goddess starting with F)

First, we're going to start with the Norse calendar. Because to have a Friday the 13th, you need a calendar with a Friday and a 13th. And we may be in luck!

See the Norse followed a lunar calendar with each month starting with the new moon and sacred to the sun. So, if we count that as 1 and follow the current days of the week - every month will have a Friday the 13th. (I haven't been able to completely verify that this was exactly how the Norse counted their days. In fact, they may have worried about counting less than we do because - hey, just look up at the moon.)

But this means - every Friday would have been sacred to Freya/Frigga. Even Friday the 13th. And Friday the 6th. Friday the 20th. Friday the 27th.

You aren't going to deprive a goddess of her due acknowledgement on her day.

So, yes, Friday the 13th would have been sacred to Freya/Frigga

And then the Patriarchy (Darth Vader Music)

Look, the Julian and Gregorian calendars were solar calendars that don't match the Norse lunar calendar so it looks more like we've just got two myths intersecting with a specific, reoccuring day in the Norse calendar.

Except - in Latin it's Veneris (Viernes for Spanish speakers) and in Rome was associated with the planet Venus. (Yes the goddess but the Romans had an odd thing going on with planets).

We've still got our usual set of Fridays. So, why not make all Fridays unlucky?

The usual thought is that 13 was associated Judas and the Last Supper. Which is why we have superstitions around the number 13. And, well, Jesus was crucified on a Friday. So possibly over time, those two came together to make Friday the 13th very unlucky.

But it is unlikely that either Freya or Frigga were involved in the matter. But you may still celebrate your favorite goddess on a Friday.

[fadran]

There are a lot of different kinds of stupid people; right now, I'm going to talk about two of them.

They're categorically connected, in the sense that their views are directly perpendicular, intersecting at a single point of Ultimate Stupidity: the idea that Religion can disprove Science, and the idea that Science can disprove Religion.

Now, I should note that I'm not religious. I was raised LDS, but have ultimately landed somewhere between Atheist and Agnostic now that I'm older and have a mind of my own. I should also note that this is Tumblr, the gayest site in the universe (by volume), and that I see a lot of religious trauma and persecution translate into hatred; and, frankly, I have nothing to say against that. I'm a straight white male, so I've never really been attacked for who I am or what I believe, and I certainly don't have any direct religious trauma - I only want to clarify that nothing I'm trying to say here is meant to attack anyone in particular or any specific institutions.

So, onto the first Stupid Person Archetype: "Religion Disproves Science."

I doubt I have to describe what I mean here. You see it all the time on Twitter (previously known as X); conspiracy theories and far-right extremists who reply to NASA or Bill Nye or whoever else is saying whatever really simple scientific facts happens to be relevant at the time. Climate Change, Vaccines, Evolution, etc. Things like "What you're ignoring is the simple TRUTH that JESUS LOVES YOU and GOD CREATED THE UNIVERSE IN HIS IMAGE" or whatever the fuck it is people think actively disproves... well, anything.

It's always completely circular logic. Why is this proven fact false, you say? It's because the Bible said so. What makes you think the Bible is a source of reliable fact and logic? Because it disproves these facts that I don't want to believe. If I'm going to try to debate someone's opinion on a particular subject and they try to cite The Bible, a hodgepodge of dozens of metaphors and traditional stories, then there's no debate to be had. They claim that it's the "truth," that it's "reason," that it's "logic," but it's just not because the Bible is not a scientific journal. It was not peer-reviewed. None of the experiments have clearly-defined parameters, and they certainly haven't been repeated in separate studies. If you're claiming that The Bible is the ultimate truth, then we're playing on two separate fields, and there's no point in even trying. If you claim that The Bible provides empirical or otherwise reliable evidence, then I can easily disprove you.

Now - allow me to turn your focus to the other Stupid Person Archetype: Science Disproves Religion.

When people claim that their religion is a greater truth than putting actual effort into trying to learn more about the world, they're just getting what they think from an echo chamber; they're just deluded. But when people claim that Empirical Evidence and cold, hard rigour can somehow... disprove something entirely inobservable, like God or Faith or the Soul? I'll sometimes tell people that this second archetype is even dumber than just believing God is real and Science is anti-truth propaganda, because you cannot claim to have a focus on the scientific method - hypothesis, observation, cross-references, peer-review - and say that you know for a fact that something strictly unknowable is true or untrue.

I would also like to point out that people will turn to Philosophy for answers, which is... still not great, but better. A lot of people will cite the Epicurean Paradox (God cannot be Omnipresent, Omnipotent, and Omnibenevolent all at once) or maybe the Ontological Argument (which I dare not utter here); and this is fine, I guess. At the very least, you're drawing your own conclusions from something well-regarded by educated individuals the world over; but I would urge you again to not regard this as the One and Only Truth.

God cannot be proven or disproven. The is the point. There is no Faith without Uncertainty, there is no Doubt without Uncertainty. That is the singular point that these two utterly foolish views cross through, the Interception of their Folly. What you believe is based on your experience and the conclusions you arrive to in your own mind, and thus limited to you and you alone. To claim a "Truth" is to claim to assert your own Belief over someone else's, and that is something no one can ever Truly do.

[swamp-world]

i think i have experienced few moments of a meme taking off that made me quite as uncomfortable and full of rage as "very demure, very mindful". i do not mind or care that someone made a tiktok saying such, good for her, etc., but walking around and having people constantly referring to myself and other people as "demure" made and makes me want to start throwing things. that we have been fighting for so long to have the right to not be demure, the right to not be expected and shamed for not being demure—for not being quiet and well-behaved. And yes I know I'm a buzzkill and I know it's just a joke but I am an angry ftm butch and I have spent my whole life being told in other words to be demure, to be quiet, to be well-dressed and well-mannered and polite and quiet even when it doesn't benefit me, especially when it doesn't benefit me, and I don't care if someone wants to take that word and apply it to themselves, but it's legitimately upsetting to me that even as a joke, it was fun and fine to call people and things "demure". yes, even when it was sarcastic about something that is perhaps decidedly not demure. had many people refer to myself and my style as such like it was some kind of substitute for "cool" and it's fucking not, maybe think about it or ask people before picking up the recent meme word which is extremely misogynistically loaded.

actually i am also going to say this: I hadn't said anything on it until now because I hadn't seen the original video. and this isn't directed at the creator of the video but at the fact that people latched uncritically onto a video explicitly about adhering to Modest Feminine Standards And Expectations In The Workplace and decided it would be fun to bring into everyone else's daily life? actually kind of nauseating. the fact that people have taken a word that has been traditionally a gendered expectation of subservience, silence, and invisibility is now just a general positively-connotated word that also just kind of means...being kind? being polite? those two things are not the same and I am uncomfortable with people using them as borderline-synonyms. i am uncomfortable not just with this, it would be one thing on its own, but with how this is intersecting with the undoing of feminist social changes. how this is intersecting with barbie feminism. with "for the girls" and "girl math" and "girl dinner" and such.

women and people assumed to be women have been expected to be a grab bag of demure and mindful and polite and even cutesey to be out of the way, not a problem, not causing a fuss, not being unladylike, not being threatening, not being "inconsiderate" to others by standing up for yourself or transitioning or speaking out. to be "respectful" not just of other people as people but other people as authority, as gatekeepers, traditionalists, exclusionists, misogynists, etc.

im glad that the creator of the original tiktok has experienced positive changes in her life from this meme. and i recognize that expectations of gender presentation are different and more strictly policed for trans women. but i also in many ways that it had never taken off at all, specifically and especially in the broader world.

[deeisace]

Thinking again about how to go about approaching publishers with my grandma Millie's first book

There's no clear thing of, like she didn't leave all her writing specifically to anyone in writing - because she couldn't, because he was nominally disowned, she just made sure my grandad, her middle son, got her writing box, made sure of it before she died, you see, and then I'm the one that's typing everything and actually working on it - very slowly, mind, there's all sorts of short stories I haven't got to, and a whole handwritten second novel, tho I think I've finished all the poetry

But erm like

How do you say to a publisher, here is a book, it's not mine, it's my dead great-grandma's and she wrote it at least 30 years ago, d'you want to publish it?

I spose that, really, in more fancier words

I spose, they publish things posthumously all the time, even tho those are usually already famous authors like, rather than some random schoolteacher from the Wirral, y'know

Or, I'd've thought self-publishing is a thing, but I wouldn't the first how to go about that, and besides back to my first point, if I did that then surely the money ought to go to someone closer related to her than me, tho her eldest son has died, her middle son (my grandad) is disinherited so far as I know (tho I don't know if that was in writing or just by social/religious pressure), and I've never met her youngest son - but it's grandad that got the box, and me that's done the work

I just think other people should see this, I'm sure it's not family bias, it is really actually good - and there's 60+ years of short stories, for kids and for adults, and reams of poetry, and two (one and a half, maybe, I've not read the second one yet, cs her handwriting can be tricky and I've not had the time besides) novels

The first one is a good 500 pages, following all the different people living in one house in London in the early 1950s, all their lives and how they intersect and differ - some of it's autobiographical, I know, taken from her early married life, and my grandad said that she said it was the sort of idea that wouldn't leave her alone, she'd put it down and pick it up again for years and years, but it was typed up, and my copy is one we found on a floppy disk, so she kept at the same story for years and years - there's bits in there referencing her life in the 50s-60s, and I'm sure some bits that are about my mum if you know to look at it sideways, and that all happened in the 90s - but besides all the bits that mean a lot to me cs I sort of get to know her through them, it really is just a good read, honestly

Oh I don't know, I haven't got the time or brain to do anything about it right now anyway, I don't even have the wherewithal to get my fucking dishes done, so

I just looked in a bookshop on my way home, and it always makes me think, to go in a bookshop, her name should be up on the shelves too, with all these others

I don't know how to get that done by myself tho

[dulcewrites]

I'm a bad influence cus you said Hades and Persephone

Ya twisted my arm (jk). But a Aemond x oc story starting from slightly from the perspective of her mother. Some details that I think would be hades x persephone coded

- house [redacted] (I’ll think of a name lmao) is a stormlands house made up of our oc (I like the name annora but I also like having flower motif) her two younger sisters and brother, and her parents -Johanna and Omar

- their sygil is a narcissus blooming through rain. It sort of symbolizes how their house sits in the intersection between the reach and stormlands/dornish marshes. Much of their wealth comes from being around extremely fertile area and what grows there. Let’s say both team green and black go there (over house Baratheon) based on that wealth

- random but i sort of like the idea of house Baratheon feeling a bit slighted that Aemond didn’t come to their house. they are like daeron will marry whoever as a conciliation prize (daeron slays but you know what I mean)

- Aemond specifically came there for annora. Johanna instantly gets #bad vibes. Not even just the obvious war thing but just the way Aemond is looking at her daughter is NOT sitting right with her. So, she lies and says her daughter is betrothed to another. Omar, completely oblivious, is like no she isn’t????

- now I go back and forth between if this Aemond is charming enough to put the rizz on annora. On one hand, I think both book and show aemond have to work themselves up bc of insecurities. But ngl something about that probably bs account, bc it’s from mushroom, of book Aemond kissing all the Baratheon girls lives rent free in my head. Like why would he do that 😵‍💫😵‍💫

- a hot prince shows up on a dragon saying he wants to marry you, there is only one answer. She’s here for it. Johanna pulls Omar to the side and is like ummm our daughter could be essentially a war prisoner. Now I don’t think Omar is a bad dad, he loves his kids. But do I think he’s super smart? Probably not lol. He sees baby targs with baby dragons. He thinks about tides changing and stormlands houses swearing fealty to them

- the luke stuff happens in front of them. Johanna is mortified, annora is still like “but mom, he took his eye of course he wouldn’t like him ☹️”

- now I kind of like deviating from the book and show in the sense that no one really knows what happened to Luke. Pieces are arrax do not wash up. Did he die on accident? Did Aemond/Vhagar kill him on purpose. Did luke runaway? Who knows. Obviously people think Aemond did something but 🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️

- they still get married despite Johanna pleading to her husband to not let this happen. Annora and Aemond have a traditional westeros faith of the seven wedding BUT and here’s the kicker. Aemond wants a Valyrian wedding as well. I really don’t care about whole blood binding thing (If y’all want to pretend she has distant Valyrian blood go for it). I just like the idea of the blood being a similar motif as the pomegranates.

Anyway I don’t want this to be too long. Just in case I’m a glutton for punishment and actually do this. But yeah it spirals from there. Aemond descends further into madness as people think he is kinslayer. He probably puts a lot of energy/obsessiveness into his relationship bc of it. Very much ‘but you don’t think I’m a murdering psycho right baby 🥺’ while cleaning off his sword of blood. Johanna just wants her daughter back… it’s a mess y’all.

[ladyimaginarium]

okay so. here's the audio recording of me& doing my& best to explain my& story. although graphic images and descriptions won't be used, heavy content warning for discussions of csa, h.uman t.rafficking, antinative racism and genocide, specifically of our native girls, women and two spirited people, as well as our boys and men. viewer's discretion is heavily advised. i& only ask that mutuals & close friends reblog this and to not repost this without my& consent. for any natives out there who may read this: we& love you. we& support you. please take care of yourselves in any way you can, whether that's talking to a friend or trusted family member or calling a hotline such as the stronghearts helpline ( usa ) or the hope for wellness helpline ( canada ), where natives & all indigenous peoples in "canada" are offered services in both english & in french, or upon request, anishinaabemowin / ojibwe / ᐊᓂᐦᔑᓈᐯᒧᐎᓐ, cree / ᓀᐦᐃᔭᐍᐏᐣ & inuktitut / ᐃᓄᒃᑎᑐᑦ & from personal experience calling there several times for my& own personal needs, their services are absolutely excellent, they have experienced and culturally competent counsellors that are reachable by telephone and online ‘chat’ 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, or smudging depending on your practice or doing something you love. i& know this week is hard for all of us, myself& included, even those who aren't personally affected, as an elder once described to me& that this is an overall intergenerational community trauma that affects everyone who's native, regardless of skintone, other intersecting identities or status. you are loved. i& love you. i& support you. i& just called the hotline just now for my& own needs & they are a tremendous help, and i& also smudged & did the sacred ceremonies. please check out this mmigw2s carrd for resources and this mmigw2s google document for information. i& will be sharing more statistics i've& found over the years later today & possibly things i& felt like i& may have missed in the audio & likely for the rest of the week. my& name is angel & i'm& the host/core/singletsona of the imaginarians galaxy, an indigenous indigiqueer & two spirited professionally dxed udd system & a medically recognized multigenic did system; today is a very important for us&, although we& don't personally know anyone who's gone missing or murdered, but bc all natives are related & are interconnected with each other & bc family is more than who you're genetically related to, it hits really close to home as a two spirit person & the intergenerational trauma hits hard. please understand that we& don't intend on hurting anyone while telling my& story as i& only have my& own experiences but if i& get smth wrong, n.atives, pls correct me&, and we& ask that nonnatives wear red today to honor those who went missing & murdered. if you want to ask questions, you can contact us& on discord, 【 𝕬𝐑𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐀 ♥ 】||【𝓣𝓱𝓮 𝓘𝓶𝓪𝓰𝓲𝓷𝓪𝓻𝓲𝓪𝓷𝓼】#2830, just make sure to let us& know who you are first, i& will not be answering publicly for our& own mental health, but make sure to compensate us&, i& will not be answering questions freely especially ones that are so traumatic at the expense of my& health, trauma & emotional exhaustion. find out who's land you're on. support native artists and creatives. fight for our rights. fight for our land back. just be aware that i& can only offer our& own experiences as a white seeming reconnecting two spirited urban native bodied system. if you want to donate, you can donate here to our& p.ayp.al, but keep in mind that you are absolutely not required to donate anything ever, however, if you want to leave a donation, i’m& keeping that option open, i& am grateful for anything, but please never feel like you absolutely have to, if you feel like people in your online/offline communities have more urgent needs and therefore should be prioritized in terms of support, absolutely please feel free to help them instead/first ( if you have the funds to help multiple people, anyway! ) NO MORE STOLEN SISTERS & SIBLINGS. EVERY CHILD MATTERS. LAND BACK.

[nokingsonlyfooles]

Brigitte Empire needs money, which can be exchanged for goods and services. Turns out, so do a lot of people! Some of them need it to live, and some of them need it to keep their shareholders happy, and some of them need it for blatant self-promotion. Watch the video and try to pick out who's who!

Then, if you feel like it, meet me under the cut for a little more on MARKETING!

All right all you cats and kittens, I got two discount bellinis in me and a silly topic that could still end civilization as we know it if we don't deal with it appropriately. Take my hand, and let me tell you the story of Capitalism figuring out that marginalized people buy things too!

Capitalism exists without the constraints of morality. If people are willing to pay for a thing, you should let them buy it, and jack up the price as much as possible. Regulations that prevent you from selling your child as hamburger meat are not a feature of Capitalism, but a constraint placed upon it by the rest of society. Thus, as soon as there is money to be made, multiple individuals and corporations will try to make as much money as possible. The only political consideration is, "What do I need to SAY I believe to maximize the profits?" It doesn't care about you, it just wants your money. We are all here to be exploited, no matter our various intersections.

Thus, it only fails to market to a specific group if it doesn't seem like that group would buy a specific thing, and/or if the consequences of the marketing would eat into the profits too much. A baby isn't going to buy a Virginia Slim cigarette (babies prefer Marlboros)

...and such a campaign would make mommies and daddies very upset, so they don't run ads with smoking infants in Highlights magazine.

But a funny thing happens when, all of a sudden, someone smacks themself on the forehead and cries, "Oh no! Babies DO buy Virginia Slims!" Or, more plausibly, "Wait! WOMEN BUY CARS!" Nobody has been marketing to that demographic, there is no playbook to follow, and they scramble for a strategy.

Oh, and it is hilarious watching them trying to figure out what a new demographic wants out of their product.

Uhhh... Pinkness and an automatic transmission, you guys? Is that good? Bill, would your wife buy one of these? If you let her, I mean, ha!

Likewise, in Brigitte's early strawberry ad: Uhhh... Glitter! The "tran"s love makeup and glitter! And a relatable, pretty nobody, and donations to worthy causes!

They're still dialing it in. Even poor Dylan up there doesn't seem to have much idea why someone who likes her brand would like a cheap, lite beer. She decided to just be honest and relatable too. "Well, it's nice having my face on a product, and one assumes you drink this while watching a sport...? Ha-ha-ha, this is kinda silly, but I guess they're trying to be nice. Well, anyway, Bud Light exists!"

It's really quite cute. It makes me like HER, but I'm not gonna buy a Bud Light. Likewise, that Gillette commercial was super sweet, but it didn't make me wanna go out and buy a Gillette razor, or anything at all. Conversely, when Goya foods shot their mouth off, I didn't stop buying them. I never started buying them. If they didn't have what I wanted in the store brand, I might have gotten a can or two of Goya, if they were the cheapest. After the beans hit the fan, I quit doing that with no more effort than moving my hand a few inches to one side or the other. No hardship to them and no hardship to me.

Me, and my friends on the left, are not big name-brand fans, or big Capitalism fans. These things are notable as cultural bellwethers - "Ah-ha! Someone did a thing! Now let's see how everyone reacts!" - but not as something we're going to go out of our way to spend money on. We define ourselves by the media we consume much more than the physical products.

The people who market physical products do not know how to handle that. It's kinda freaking them out. That's why we get all those stories about "MILLENNIALS ARE KILLING [THING]!" No, they're just not willing to be ride-or-die with a brand, or even a type. "Hmm, these ciders are all too expensive... How 'bout some box wine?" We don't have the disposable income to be picky, because Capitalism will devour itself for profit as much as anything else.

The throwbacks who are still willing to define themselves via a brand tend to skew right, but they're volatile as hell. Anything that looks like progress or "wokeness" makes them SCREAM. The pundits and politicians like it that way, it keeps them in power - the corporations, not so much. It's getting less and less feasible to be an AMERICAN [or other national identity] brand. There's a culture war in progress - but no matter which side you pick, they will not remain reliable, complacent consumers.

That's why corporate culture is involved in this weird "two steps forward, two steps back" dance. When it's clear who's winning, they'll pick a side. Until then, they're like a bunch a little kids at a party who really want to pick up the pinata candy, except the kid with the blindfold is still staggering around swinging the stick. Meanwhile, the leftists are busy looking for hot dogs in the trash, and the conservatives are screaming, pointing, and throwing more candy on the ground, so they can demonstrate how much they hate the latest evil product.

That last one doesn't make any damn sense, right? Boycotts are rarely effective, and buying more of a thing is not even a boycott. Bud Light will take your money whether you love their beer or hate it. You can throw it at a cop if you want, they just want your money.

Guess what? So do the conservatives. Also, your attention and your validation. That's why they're yelling so loud. All of us need to be heard and seen. All of us perform to show others who we are on the inside. When you film yourself performing and post on social media, though, you can make actual cash. Build enough of a following for your content and Bud Light will show up on your doorstep and offer to put your face on a can!

You're reading this on Tumblr right now, you are at least somewhat aware of how algorithms serve up content, and that the search function will serve you more engagement if you're doing something popular. I already know this post is gonna crash and burn, too, 'cos I don't have a lot of followers and it doesn't involve a fandom. Maybe later the Tumblr goblins will find it and like it, but not for a long while. If I wanted clicks (and I do) I'd give you something on Guardians of the Galaxy, or Spiderverse, or more Kung Fu Panda. If I were branding myself as a conservative gun nut, I'd get a lot of eyeballs on me if I bought a case of Bud and assassinated it right now. I don't want those eyeballs, but some folks sure do.

It's exploitation all the way down and we shouldn't be surprised. People need money to live, and if they have a little extra, they can have fun with it. Bud Light hires themself a trans spokesperson, as an investment, and she needs the money so she does an ad for the beer, and herself. Conservative culture warriors launch themselves at this latest target, every one of them also doing an ad - for themselves and their entertaining and justified outrage. And the platforms that host them rake in engagement from both sides, and more money. All that commerce, all that profit, all that potential, springs from the body of one trans influencer who likes to purchase goods and services - as one does.

In this instance, the beer people freaked out and spent a lot more money taking two steps back. It ain't always gonna be like that - and the next folks who want money from the trans demographic will have some valuable marketing data for the future - but we'll have to wait and see.

Now, I did say this was a silly topic that could end civilization as we know it if we don't handle it right, so picture some scary music right here. There is a market for grinning white faces who shoot guns at "wokeness," and the people with grinning white faces and guns know that, as do the platforms that host them. They make money for the platform and the platform makes money for them. Without intervention, this is a closed circle that only requires a new, popular thing to be mad about, and they can manufacture those at will. Violence and outrage are becoming a commodity, and people are already buying it.

It's popular to be mad at trans folks right now, but "woke" can be anything. They do not actually care what they are mad about, or what anyone who consumes their content does with that anger, they just want your money (clicks, attention, data, etc). Say what you will of the stochastic terrorism of the past, at least it had a political agenda. A privileged politician isn't going to turn on you nearly as fast as a social-media-climber looking for clout. Do you think you're stealth, invisible, acceptable? Do you wanna find out what happens if suddenly you're not?

Regulation and deplatforming are the only way to keep the outrage machine from eating up real human lives. But we are not asking sociologists or internet scholars or anyone who might have a clue to regulate anything. Regulation is something politicians do, and I wouldn't trust any of 'em to set up a wireless printer. As for deplatforming, for now, that's in the hands of the platforms, and they just want your money.

I'm just talking about one potential brand of annihilation, here. Capitalism will sell us everything we need to destroy ourselves, for as high a price as the market will bear. It doesn't care.

If we want it to stop, we have to care enough to apply the brakes. Ai-yi-yi, but I know we've already been trying, and we're not getting much traction.

Better get yourself one o' them pink cars with the automatic transmission, and buckle in.

[chickensoup1025]

I'm just gonna answer all of these rn even tho that's not the point

1. Comfort character? Leslie Knope, Kirishima Eijirou, Adrien Agreste, Iko from tlc, Kyle Broflovski, Tweek Tweak, Willow Park... and a lot more lol

2. If I had to pick between a lighter and matches I guess I'd say matches

3. No I don't leave the window open at night cause of the AC

4. I don't believe any cryptid exist/I don't really care about that stuff

5. Brown 🤎

6. Why what

7. Hair ties over scrunchies. Tighter.

8. Zero water bottles in my room right now. I have one metal one I keep on me all the time (that I've painted on) and I'm at work rn so

9. I don't drink coffee. Couple reasons. Arfid said no to trying new things, smells weird, and if I got into caffeine I'm positive I'd get addicted so. Stopping that at the source thank you.

10. I wouldn't slaughter anyone. If I was in a very specific position and situation, there's a chance I'd KILL someone maybe but slaughter is much too much. Also I don't care about the rich part

11. I like reading a lot!!

12. It's a tired, cloudy, woke up late but I have stuff to do kind of day.

13. I ate a chocolate chip muffin this morning (at noon)

14. I guess I like the smell of after it rains. Doesn't rain a lot at ALL where I live so it is a luxury

15. No, I'm not a parent

16. Yes, I can drive! Got my license around 4 years ago

17. I have pretty damn great vision. Not far or near sighted.

18. Uh. I use Costco brand stuff in the shower

19. Of COURSE I'd paint your nails! I'm gonna get paint all over your skin though, that's a promise

20. I say "soda"

21. I still have a lot of things from childhood as I still live with my parents but I'd say the main thing is a ladybug pillow pet I got in 2010 I still sleep with

22. I'm an awesome person, thank you very much.

23. Chilly weather is alright I guess

24. If we were together on a rooftop... well. I might stand up and start belting show tunes so watch out.

25. Shower soap bar lol

26. A scenario I've replayed multiple times would have to be... leaving my first job

27. All in one go hours of sleep? 3 average :(

28. I don't regularly wear a mask, no

29. Hot water!! Very hot!!

30. I don't think there are dishes in my room

31. Pretty lyrics and a soft guitar- think "Victory" by the Avett Brothers

32. Nah, I don't have a favorite towel

33. I went on a mini adventure last night where I just kept driving till there was no "forward" at an intersection and then took a right. Kept doing this for almost two hours.

34. Oh course! I know a LOT of songs' every lyric by heart. Example off the top of my head: Anthem Of Mr Dark by the Arcadian Wild

35. PDT zone

36. I only changed my url once I think. Can't remember exactly what it was before this

37. Yeah, I've known my friend Nikki for maybe 14 years

38. Scent-free please

39. No, I don't use lip balm

40. Nah, I haven't had any snacks today

41. I don't drink coffee

42. Google for ao3 and miscellaneous, Pinterest for fan art, ibis Paint x for art and editing, YouTube, Spotify, Google maps, DROPOUT, Discord, gmail. In no particular order

43. Can't really handle any spice

44. A free pass to kill anyone? I guess Donald Trump idk

45. Yeah yesterday was a waste

46. My favorite holiday film is... uh. Well I really like Elf.

47. Last message I sent was a discord server emoji of demon Kokichi sprite lol

48. I accidentally had a sip of my granddad's wine which I thought was my apple juice. But I don't drink as I am 20. I don't plan on drinking when I'm of age either. See^ I'm sure I'll get addicted among many other reasons to not start

49. I've never tried skipping rocks, I don't think!

50. Please do tag me in random stuff!!

here’s weirder asks

who is/are your comfort character(s)?

lighter or matches?

do you leave the window open at night?

which cryptyd being do you believe in?

what color are your eyes?

why did you do that?

hair-ties or scrunchies?

how many water bottles are in your room right now?

which do you prefer, hot coffee or cold coffee?

would you slaughter the rich?

favorite extracurricular activity?

what kind of day is it?

when was the last time you ate?

do you love the smell of earth after it rains?

are you a parent? (all answers qualify)

can you drive?

are you farsighted or nearsighted?

what hair products do you use?

imagine we’re at a sleepover, would you paint my nails?

do you say soda or pop?

something you’ve kept since childhood?

what type of person are you?

how do you feel about chilly weather?

if we were together on a rooftop, what would we be doing?

perfume/body spray or lotion?

a scenario that you’ve replayed multiple times?

about how many hours of sleep did you get?

do you wear a mask?

how do you like your shower water?

is there dishes in your room?

what type of music keeps you grounded?

do you have a favorite towel?

the last adventure you’ve been on?

is there a song you know every word to by heart?

what’s your timezone?

how many times have you changed your url?

someone in your life, other than a relative, you’ve known for 10+ years?

a soap bar that smells good?

do you use lip balm?

did you have any snacks today?

how do you take your coffee?

an app you frequently use besides this godforsaken site?

what’s your take on spicy foods?

you get a free pass to kill anyone, who is it?

can you remember what happened yesterday?

favorite holiday film?

what was the last message you sent?

when did you first try an alcohol beverage?

can you skip rocks?

can i tag you in random stuff?

[sideshow-tornado]

1, 3, 11, 13, 29, 30 ❤️

what are 3 things you’d say shaped you into who you are?

(I) I was interested in performing and acting at a young age, and being lucky enough to have a thriving community theatre in my small town growing up where I got to start performing at 9 years old was such a huge and important influence on my life. (II) I was 13 years old when I first got access to the Internet, which at the time (1995) was a pale shadow of what it is now, but also such an interesting and varied world to get immersed in. I think we Xennials lucked out with being able to mostly come of age with the Internet but were more or less fully grown and mature adults before the saturation of social media/influencer/smart phone culture. (III) I started playing tennis competitively in junior high, I was pretty good. Although I did have a bad habit of being a front runner, if I got out ahead on an opponent I could usually hold them off and win. But I was not so good at coming back after getting down quickly to start a match. I specifically had a singles match early in my Sophomore year of high school where I played well but still lost the first two sets. I felt like maybe I could force a fourth set but I didn't have a great track record and either would mentally or physically crap out in such a match. But I hung in there, won the third set, my coach kept coming back to me and reassuring me that I could do it, teammates would come by and watch and cheer me on, and eventually I did wear down the other guy and won an absolutely brutal 5 set match where we beat each other up for like four hours. I went on to have a really great year and my junior year started having some college interest. While my competitive tennis career didn't last much longer, I still carry the lesson and feeling from overcoming a previously undoable action with me to this day.

3 films you could watch for the rest of your life and not get bored of?

I'm gonna single out 3 somewhat lesser known or remembered films from 1999 because that was a great year for film and it's the 25th anniversary for those films: Mumford (a Capra-esque quirky small town romantic comedy with just enough 90s milieu to not feel old fashioned), Bowfinger (starring Steve Martin and Eddie Murphy a silly but hilarious comedy about Hollywood and filmmaking but with such a giant heart that makes it so endearing), Summer of Sam (Spike Lee's way underrated look at NYC in the summer of 1977 during the ongoing Son of Sam killings).

what do you consider to be romance?

I think romance is probably best described as the intersection of intimacy, whimsy, desire, and comfort.

what are you doing right now?

waiting for dinner to be ready and watching "The Challenge" on MTV which I've seen every single episode of and have watched since the very beginning when it was The Real World vs Road Rules Challenge and was just a one off special in the early years. I have never seen an episode of Survivor or The Amazing Race or any number of similar shows, but I'm down with The Challenge forever.

what do you do when you’re sad?

Listen to music. The quickest and strongest way to get some catharsis and hopefully feel better.

what’s one thing that never fails to make you happy/happier?

Unfortunately I don't think anything is fail proof in that regard, but as I mentioned above music comes the closest.