#it's just funny how patterns are formed and then maintained

[becauseimanicequeen]

Just when I thought We Are had exchanged the old engineering and architecture student thing for engineering and fine art students, it turns out Fang studies architecture.

Well, it’s hard to let go of old patterns, lol.

[zippidi-dooda]

It was dark in Diluc's bedroom, save for the dim, yellow light the lamp on his nightstand provided.

Maybe you should have dragged him somewhere with more light so you could better see the damage done on his body. Though, from what you could see, his injury was already healing. He'd bandaged himself up in clean, white bands of cloth that covered the large, once-bleeding gash on his side.

Any sign that he had felt or was in pain was well hidden and had you not drunkenly barged into his room whilst he was changing, you wouldn't have noticed he had even been hurt.

Stubborn and adamant on letting you see if he was really okay, you had convinced him to sit down. So, now here you were, sitting on your knees behind him, frown on your face as your lithe fingers traced delicately over the bandage where the cut marred his skin. He was still and silent, welcoming your gaze but refusing to say what had caused the injury.

"Y'know-hic! 'Scuse me. Master diluc," you started. "I coulda helped ya out. Beat whoever it was that did this before they did it."

"I've no doubt you could. But this was an affair I could only settle on my own."

Humming, your eyes trailed over his pale skin in search of any other nics he may have taken. There wasn't much, to your confusion. Not even smaller scars healed over from years ago. Just a handful of small scratches with dried blood that almost looked like something left from a paper cut. That and the well defined shapes of his muscles that he constantly worked to maintain and the unruly river of fire that cascaded down his back in a high ponytail, creating a sharp and captivating contrast of red and light tones.

In a lulled daze, your hand rose to brush his curly locks over his shoulder to rest against his bare chest so you could get a better look at his toned back.

You almost forgot why you were examining him in the first place as you ogled his form.

He sat straight, muscles relaxed as he waited for you to finish confirming he was okay. It was somehow calming to see his back extend as he breathed in then out and you began to giggle softly to yourself.

Diluc simpled looked at you from the corner of his eye but continued to wait patiently.

You reached out and began slowly tracing the outline of his muscles with hands ever so gentle that you felt him suck in a deep breath.

"You done yet?" He asked.

You chuckled, "Nuh uh," and continued to follow the curves and dips of his skin, from his back to his arms then back again.

You could see his fingers fiddling with the thick blankets beneath you and smiled wider as you felt the slight flex of his muscles as he did so.

He seemed nervous.

It was rather funny to you, this stoic man suddenly nervous. You wanted to laugh and tease him for it. But at the same time, you just wanted sooth him and have him feel relaxed again.

You pondered how you could make that happen without letting him go, admiring the steadily familiar pattern of his body.

He was a very handsome man, you realized, no matter what part of him you looked at. You wondered if he acknowledged that.

How could you make him?

Shambled ideas of how you could help him see what yourself and so many others did ran through your mind and your head began to spin, falling on one idea that you never would have dare to do had this been any other time.

You gave his back one last feel up before bringing your hands and body forward, chest against his back, hands tracing over his abs and pressing warm lips to his shoulder.

His whole body grew rigid and you began to laugh, pressing another kiss to the spot between his shoulder blades.

"Y/N?"

You hiccuped and slowly made a trail of sloppy kisses against his flushing skin. "Master Diluc, I'm gonna yell you a secret that e'rybody knows about, m'kay?"

You felt him shudder as you kissed against his neck and smiled. "You are someone that even the archons would be jealous of. You're smart," Kiss, "and heroic," kiss, "charming," kiss, "strong," kiss, "wealthy," kiss, "powerful," kiss, "handsome. God, you're handsome."

"You've ... had too much to drink ... Y/N. Maybe you should, go to bed."

You ceased your ministrations to fully wrap your arms around his torso, burying your face against his increasingly hot skin.

"Nuh uh. I didn't drink that much. Ask Adelinde. And I mean it Diluc. You're very attractive, in every aspect of you. Your looks, your attitude, your character, personality, voice, and and and everything else I can't think of right now. Even little injuries and tragedies can't change that. I just hope you know that. And I'm glad to have met you, Diluc. So, you can't go being reckless anymore, got it?"

He appeared to be at a loss for words, so you sat up and cupped his cheeks, turning him to face you. "There are people who care about you, Diluc. You can't," you sniffled, eyes tearing up, "you can't forget and go getting yourself so badly hurt no one can help you one day. Ask me for help next time, that way I can make sure you live to show everyone how amazing you are. Got it?"

His expression softened and now it was his turn to cup your cheeks, thumbs rubbing under your eyes to wipe away your tears.

"I'll be fine, Y/N. You can't come with me," you began to let out hiccuped sobs, grasping onto his wrists tightly, "but I promise you'll be the first one I talk to before I leave and as soon as I come back, okay? If I'm hurt, I'll tell you and you can check up on me again if you want, would you like that?"

You sniffled, trying to stop your crying and nodded softly.

"Thank you, Y/N. And ... you're very ... attractive too. This consideration of yours is very hard to find. And you uh ... you ... you look ... you .... You're gorgeous. You-"

"Kiss me."

"Huh?"

You threw yourself forward, lips pursed and eyes closed, longing to see how the Uncrowned King of Mondstat's lips felt against your own.

Only for him to dodge your kiss by turning to the side, your chin falling on his shoulder.

You leaned back, staring at him incredulously. He took your hands in his, cheeks flushing pink, and cleared his throat.

"Y/N, I'd love to. But, you have been drinking. And I'm not wearing a shirt. I want to be for you, what you are for me. My reason to work so hard, to keep myself from falling to an enemy. My encouragement and the one person I'm comfortable doing anything with. You make me so unbelievably happy by just getting to see you smile or hear your voice or mention of your name. I want to keep you safe and comforted, to be the one you can come to when things get hard and even when they're not. Y/N, I love you. And I want to kiss you at a place and time you can't forget, even if it's just when we're sitting together doing nothing, cleaning up late-night at the winery, or battling hilichurls, it'll be a perfect moment. So, forgive me for denying you this time."

Diluc raised your hands up to his lips and kissed them, slowly, softly, all while keeping his red eyes trained on yours.

And that was all it took for you to bawl again, heart clenching at his sappy, sincere confession and display of affection.

[elacular-kink]

Hicvember 8: Singles

Have a little story with some nameless characters having singles and noticing things about each other.

Content: Single hiccups, burps, arousal, embarrassment, alcohol.

"*HILK!* Ah!" A's hand flew up to cover her mouth, and she felt her cheeks heating as she and her friends, B and C, walked back from the mess hall. "Ah...excuse me."

C had burst out laughing as soon as he heard the massive noise. "Whoa, that was so loud! You got a case of the hiccups or something?"

"N-no, I just...that happens to me occasionally." A played with the hem of her shirt. "I'm not sure why. It's most common after I eat, but sometimes they just...come out of nowhere."

C kept snickering. "I'd never even imagine your dignified ass squeaking so loud."

"Mmmf." A rubbed her temples, but as she did, something occurred to her. "Oh, B, I'm sorry, I know that your hearing is sensitive, are you al—" A's voice died when she actually looked at B, seeing their face flushed unusually pink and their eyes already staring at her. "...right?"

"Wh—oh!" B shook their head. "Nah, I'm fine, don't worry about it."

A did worry about it, but that wasn't really B's fault. It wasn't their fault that she had a crush on them, after all. As time went on, though, A's attention on B led her to start to notice a pattern.

...

"...after which both squads will make our final assault on thei–*HURK!* mmf, excuse me, their base. Do you all understand?"

"Yes ma'am!" Almost everyone on the team responded. C had done so through giggles, for which A was considering smacking him. More surprisingly, B only straightened up and responded when they noticed everyone else doing so. And their face seemed suspiciously red for someone who had just had a training exercise strategy explained to them.

"B, come here." Having a crush on them didn't mean that A couldn't maintain her authority under the circumstances, and B approached without complaint, though they kept their head low. "You were listening to my strategy, right?" A kept their voice calm, but the idea that B might not have been hurt her more than it really should have.

B nodded rapidly. "Yeah, yeah! Of course! I'm sorry, I just, uh..." they got redder and scratched the back of their neck. "That single caught me off guard is all."

A's brow furrowed. "'Single?'"

"Ah—" B seemed even less composed at that as they shrunk in on themself. "S-sorry, the...the hhhiccup. It was just a single. Not a, um, a whole case."

"Oh." A wasn't really sure what to do with that, though it made her wonder how one ended up having a word for such a specific concept. "Alright then. Go, um, join your squad?" B nodded and jogged off, and A shook her head to refocus her thoughts, but that stuck in her brain.

...

"*HMK-ggrrp!* Oh fuck, 'scuse me, dude!" C laughed at himself as he glared playfully at the can of beer in his hand. "Forgot that booze does that to me sometimes. Hey, you get to be the one to make fun of me this time, A!"

A shook her head and smiled. "You're lucky I'm very magnanimous and forgiving."

"Lucky you're no fun, more like." C took another sip and let out an even louder "*HIURP!*" that had him laughing again.

It was more surprising to A that B wasn't making fun of him. Instead, they were bright pink, focus narrowed in on C. That night at the bar, A watched curiously as B stayed by C's side the whole time, keeping an unusually close eye on him and flinching whenever he had another half-hiccup half-burp "single."

Flinching and blushing.

A was starting to form a theory as to why B had a word for that.

...

"*HIULK!*–kuh! Hff. Excuse me." A heard C snickering and glanced over at him. "I'm shocked that you still find that so amusing."

"Hey, not my fault you make funny noises," he said.

A sighed. "I suppose that's true." She looked out of the corner of her eye at B and bit the inside of her lip to make sure she didn't smirk. "It's not your fault that I hiccup so frequently." The word made B look up and their face get redder, and A mentally tallied another data point. She was becoming more and more confident in her theory...and was also researching how one might go about getting more than just a "single" hiccup.

[goodluckclove]

RANDOM EXCERPT TIME

the cool thing about migration patterns is that ollie exists now, a character who's magic comes from her arfid. so i actually have an entirely new way to conceptualize food and nutrition.

as someone who struggles with disordered eating i really related to writing this sequence between her and tenzin (thanks to @godsmostfuckedupgoblin for inspiring me to set it in my real-life favorite park in portland). i'd love to see if anyone else in a similar place finds some joy in this!

it's not sad by the way it's very cute. i like ollie a lot.

By the time they finished the bag of peas was half defrosted. Ollie tore open the top and was tossing loose handfuls ahead of them, which quickly summoned more ducks than Tenzin was able to fully process.

“Touching peas like that doesn’t bother you?” Tenzin asked, watching form her corner of the bench.

“Hm? Ah. No, why?”

“You used to freak out about eating anything that popped in your mouth. That was probably one of your biggest icks.”

Ollie grinned and shook her head. “No, no. Eggs are my biggest ick. Uh, yeah – I’m not about to eat any of this trash. But it’s better for the birds than bread or crackers. And you gotta be nice to birds,” she leaned down slowly until she was far enough for a larger beige duck to snap some green bulbs from the palm of her outstretched hand. “I am growing, though, Like, as a person. Had a big win the other day.”

“Yeah?”

“Ate an olive.”

She wiped some moisture off her palms, slapping them together in a grandly dramatic fashion before leaning back against the bench and idly rubbing along the edge of her bad knee. Ollie cast Tenzin a look of bemused pride, the type of pride that was an actual sense of accomplishment masked as humor in order to deflect potential mockery.

Tenzin put the groceries back in the bag and set it on the concrete at their feet, where it was quickly inspected by their horde of hungry ducks. She turned on the bench, crossing one leg on the seat of it. “Like, a whole olive?”

“Straight out of the jar,” Ollie smirked.

“On purpose? I mean, did you know –?”

Ollie waggled her brow. “Oh, I knew. Knew the whole time.”

“Holy shit.”

That got a pleased laugh out of Ollie. She made a dismissive, joking gesture, but as the amusement faded Tenzin saw a slight flush simmering along her cheeks and the bridge of her nose.

“An olive,” it’s funny how one small act could take precedence over years of unspoken resentment. “That would’ve killed you when we were kids,” Tenzin leaned forward and lowered her voice. “How’d it happen? What’d you think afterwards?”

At first Ollie said nothing. She broadened her grin slightly, though tinging it with a hint of suspicion. Or maybe embarrassment? It was hard to tell. Finally she broke from her line of sight and snickered sheepishly at their audience of wandering ducks.

“I was in the Mess Hall,” she began. “Renja left a bottle on the counter. I saw it, and – I don’t know – something broke inside of me. I was just like fuck it and I ate one. It really isn’t –”

“Did you like it?” Tenzin cut in.

Ollie looked at her. She scoffed again. “Not really. The texture was fine, and I liked how salty it was, but it kind of tasted like blood.”

Tenzin stared at her friend. Her curls were well maintained. There were strands of silver that now stood out among the occasional ringlet of chestnut brown. She had smile lines starting to form in the corners of her mouth. Because she smiled a lot. Ollie always smiled a lot.

“You ate an olive,” Tenzin whispered in astonishment.

Ollie looked like she was going to laugh, but didn’t. She locked eyes again with Tenzin, searching her face, seeing something in Tenzin the same way she saw something in Ollie. When she smiled again it was surprisingly gentle.

“I ate an olive,” Ollie murmured proudly.

[kimiro-art]

How the touchstarved character react to MC in lingerie

Nsfw?

MHIN

They swear. It wasn't their intention to walk in on you like that. But all those drunk people down at the bar were just too much for Mhin at the moment and didn't really help the fact that they already had a having bad day. They just wanted to calm down in your room and maybe even cuddle. :(

You were about to take off your underwear after trying them on (and failing, the whole outfit was too complicated to figure out anyway) and then take a well-deserved bath. Instead, you're interrupted by a groan and then the sound of a door opening and closing.

“Y/n, are you here? I-“ And sure enough, you were here. Fully dressed in black lingerie with beautiful feather patterns. Strings adorned your entire body and hung from your hips.

All Mhin could do was blankly stare. Their eyes roamed over your beautyfull body and there was nothing they could do to keep their eyes from doing so. A blush formed on mhins cheeks and without saying anything else, Mhin turned around and was about to leave the room.

You just stood there confused. You and Mhin had been together for a while now and you had both seen each other naked, but Mhin still had this thing that made them look away when you changed clothes or walked around your room with little clothes on. You think it was their way of being polite and maintaining their demeanor even when it wasn't necessary. Not after the many times you and Mhin have shared a bed.

“Stay here,” you say and mhin stops in their tracks “come here. I need your help to take this off again. I was having a hard time getting all those cords in place.” you turned your back to them to show mhin all the knots and loops you had to tie together, hoping that somehow it would be right this way.

Honestly. It looked kind of funny.

When Mhin turned to you, they had to suppress a smile. you looked like a wildly wrapped present in the back and you indeed actually needed help.

Mhin hesitantly walked towards you and started helping you undo all the knots and loops again.

“You know... the ribbons aren't suppose to go like this” they say quietly as they undid a bow and brushed the ribbon from your shoulder. you felt mhin move their cold hands from one spot to another as they worked their way through the chaos. “I know, but it's hard to figure out where everything is suppose to go. It's not like these things come with instructions" maybe they come with instructions. But you had to buy one without one. A pity.

Mhin glanced over your shoulder towards you in the mirror. secretly taking in the view again. They had to admit. Even only half complete. You still looked absolutely gorgeous like this. "I could help you put it on next time if you want... but I doubt it's going to stay on for very long" they say with a serious face. Tho. Their eyes seemed to flicker a bit at the last part.

Before you could say anything else. The last knot was undone and your top part fell to the floor, finally freeing you . “I like you more without all the fancy stuff,” mhin says. Hug you lightly from behind and look into your eyes through the mirror. You knew that expression too well.

(I know I take way tooo long making these)

[ruthlesslistener]

...okay now I'm haunted by "what if the planet in Subnautica is in the process of developing its own indigenous sapient life after the Sea Emperors' deaths... and it's the reaper leviathans"

like the scanner calls them basically all brawn no brains but the fate of the Degasi suggests they recognize 'one of their own' and react to avenge/defend it, and their circling behavior means they're basically taking their sweet time sizing you up before they attack. They have dexterous appendages that could be easily adapted to tool use.

...And now I have a stray plot bunny because this thought is running into "if the warpers talk to each other using sophisticated protocols the radios can pick up, they're undeniably sapient themselves and their behavior patterns attacking you reflect this" and just imagining like. a reaper leviathan beginning to develop telepathic communication, trying to eat a disoriented warper who's lost their connection to the others, warper cuts reaper's mouth to get it to back off, and they end up in a standoff that ends up a conversation.

I mean just imagining a reaper leviathan as an early-sapience protagonist is very funny to me. My mental image constructs a teenager who lucked out genetically and got big faster than her neighbors so she thinks she's hot shit but is understimulated due to lack of a challenge, but whose primary emotional cope for basically anything she can't rip to pieces is to just Yell At It until it realizes how big and scary she is and backs down.

.

Oh my god you have no idea how much I'd adore an au like this. While I love the Architects as dearly as anyone, one of my biggest disappointments with Subnautica was that the intelligent species native to the planet got kind of left to the endgame/shuttled to the side, and then cut from the sequel when the main writer for Below Zero left. Like, I kind of get it, they wanted to have it be a big lead up in the og story and they had troubles in the next, but I want!!! More intelligent fish aliens!!! ESPECIALLY since the Sea Emperor has a concept of reincarnation, implying a philosophy and belief system that is unique to their species and doesn't require hands to maintain.

Though honestly, I think there's a solid enough baseline for that plotbunny already- Planet 4546B has recently undergone/was in the grips of a mass extinction event due to the bacteria plague, which means that there is not only a good deal of resource scarcity compared to the bountiful sea life that the ancestors of the current-day Reapers experience. Paired with that, the Sea Dragon Leviathans- known predators of the Reaper- have dwindled in number to only about three active individuals, which means that there's a lot more Reapers around to compete with. Assuming that intelligence is tied to adaptability, and that the Sea Emperors and Reapers share a common ancestor with the trait that formed into telepathy in the Emperor species, and you have a setup where natural selection is prioritizing Reaper leviathans who are not only mature strong enough and fast enough to outclass the other Reapers, but are also intelligent enough to outwit them. Size and quick maturity might have been a confounding factor in human evolution, but in terms of an egg-laying species, we can perhaps have them experience a longer incubation time, which results in a bigger hatchling. The increased size allows the baby to outcompete other juveniles, which in turn gives it the calories needed to help build that big brain that becomes a necessary tool once it becomes large enough to be seen as competition by adult Reapers. And as for the telepathy, being able to potentially settle territorial disputes and gather huntsmates, leading to less energy and risk wasted on members of the same species, and more being aimed at taking down more prey. It's a totally feasible fictitious evolution path, especially since the leviathans themselves are so mysterious

(Also, animals always tend to be more intelligent than people expect them to be. If the PDA was scanning for brain size in relation to muscle mass for the Reapers, its very well likely that it assumed intelligence based off of that, which we know from birds is not an accurate judgement.)

BUT ANYWAYS I'm also incredibly fond of this concept because ngl it also reminds me of how I write young dragons (especially from a specific tribe) where young female adolescents go through this big period of teenage badasseryhood where they essentially try to act like they're hot shit to try to intimidate potential rivals and test the waters to see which of the older females are starting to go soft so that they can go on ahead with their territory-claiming. For this specific Reaper, I can easily imagine a scenario where she's got an advantageous new mutation that lead to her outclassing her peers, but being in that awkward spot where she's just not quite big enough yet to challenge any of the older reapers, so she instead spends a good deal of time mucking about trying to work on looking Big and Scary, which involves a lot of tearing shit apart with her mandibles, roaring, and trying to stun prey into silence with her telepathy, which makes her Very Loud but also Very Good at Being Loud with her thoughts.

It would also be interesting to delve a little into Warper telepathy- the Architects bioengineered them into what they are now out of a probably-extinct species, and are thus likely responsible for giving them the ability to interact with computers and teleport, but since telepathy already existed in at least the Sea Emperors, the ability to communicate could either be natural to the species they modified, or implemented because they themselves did not think that they would be capable without being networked. What makes this so interesting, however, is that the Sea Emperor mentions that the Architects were incapable of hearing her (most likely because they were all networked; Al-an makes a very big deal about that, so they were probably closed off to outsiders and attuned only to other Architects), so it could be that the Warpers were ignoring this very loud new baby up until one got disconnected from the rest (perhaps due to mechanical failure?) and thus ONLY has Large Screaming Teenager to talk to. Which sets up a very interesting potential partnership between a very old, very exasperated, and very aware-of-vulnerability-Warper, and a very bored teenage Reaper who only knows violence and yelling, but is letting this particular Warper live because she's so bored out of her skull that the intrigue of helping them is better than tearing up the reef and getting tail-smacked by her elders for the nth time. Maybe the Warper can teach her how to use her telepathy better, and talk to her about the Architects and their purpose while they travel to find new parts to fix them with.

Fuck, that's a really good story prompt actually. I'm weak for accidental mentorship or adoption stories, doubly weak for inhuman apex predators being dumbass teenagers, and the potential language differences between two types of telepathy could be really fun to play with. Plus there's the advantage of getting to write about intelligent aliens that don't craft like us or built societies like we do, which is something that I personally think is severely underrated in sci-fi

[kikker-oma]

I saw your crocheting dilemma. I just want to say that it’s always hard in the beginning. I have been crocheting for years (I frequently have to go back to watch videos to re-learn some techniques, so I always rely on videos since they are they easiest way to learn) and have a few tips if you would like? If not, feel free to ignore this- start ignoring now, cause the rest is advice:

First, the crochet circle is very hard for a beginner, typically flat projects are best, so don’t get discouraged- also did you mention that you are learning this from a kit/book? Good on you, but videos may be a little easier to learn from if you want to see different hand positioning. If you still want to work on the circle, PRACTICE, it first. What I mean by practice is-set up a practice run, you should get a length of yarn, use a large crochet hook (larger than recommended for initial practice (if you have a larger hook)-it makes the stitches larger, so it’s easier to see what to do), also make sure your stitches are looser, one of the hardest things for me to learn when I started crocheting was to maintain yarn tension (same also applies to knitting). If the stitches are too tight, it’s extremely hard to continue stitching, but if it’s too loose, you’ll lose it’s form and it turns into a mess.

Like I said, the only way to get better is to practice. I think you are doing a double magic ring? I highly recommend watching a video, it is really hard to do this by just following a book. This one is pretty good, she even explains how it works:

https://youtu.be/bvQsM7VzRMo?si=7CMpQqG6Jr64NMcq

I wish you the best of luck, try not to get discouraged, yarn crafts are always hard in the beginning. Even the picture you posted looks better than my first attempts. The magic ring is more intermediate than for beginners, so don’t worry, you’ve got this, just go slow.

Alright, I will stop advising, I’m sorry if I got a little too lecture heavy, especially if you didn’t need it. I just wanted to help since I know how hard it is to start.

But you’ve got this, it may just take some time. YOU CAN DO IT!! Soon you’ll have friends asking for you to make something for them.

Aahhh these are wonderful tips, thank you so much!❤️

The kit I bought includes some videos, and I thought it was gonna walk me through the whole thing but it went , "this is not for beginners""magic circles are hard" and basically only showed how to do a slip knot and then was like, "now you're ready to do the pattern on your own😀"

It was really funny honestly😂😂 thankfully I only paid $7 for it so it wasn't a giant waste of money lol

I'll definitely be looking up videos and should probably start with something simple until I get a bit more knowledge on how different patterns work. Thank you for the encouragement! I need to practice so I can make ALL the plushies haha.

Even tho this was a frustrating start, new things tend to be frustrating so it's ok. And honestly I can already see why people love it. I know I will too!....eventually😂😉

[arttheclown]

💖 + your MLP faves and your Digimon faves and why. Now

💖 send me this & i will ramble about my faves!

MY LITTLE PONY

🐴 discord — amazing slow-burn (& realistic) character development, excellent voice acting by one mr. john de lancie, has chemistry with nearly every character he interacts with, sympathetic while still retaining a wild & unpredictable edge. has NO right to be as funny as he is. my baby boy.

🐴 tirek — manages to be endearing & kind of stupid without erasing how dangerous he can be; surprising soft side that doesn’t erase his cruelty; interesting backstory & dynamics with his family; reluctant dad dynamic with cozy glow that melts my heart. also he’s super hot sowwy 😔

🐴 twilight — highly relatable 2 me on a personal level; an extremely dynamic main character that the writers weren’t afraid to depict as flawed or a little ugly sometimes. really good friend and big sister. needs to be nicer to herself 😭 i just care for her a lot & all of her accomplishments on the show felt really earned

🐴 celestia — ugghhh she has such a fascinating backstory & there are so many interesting implications about her character that i wish the show explored better. this lady has dealt with so much grief in her life while having to maintain an image of poise & dignity for her kingdom. i like that they showed us she has a sense of humour & is nowhere near as perfect as she seems but i do wish they took her. a Little more seriously. i care her 🥺

honourable mentions: fluttershy, pinkie pie, trixie lulamoon, queen chrysalis, rarity, applejack, spike, big mac.

DIGIMON:

👾 impmon / beelzemon — i like him for a lot of the reasons i like discord tbh. his character arc is one of my favourites in fiction, ever, and never ceases to rip my heart out every time i rewatch the show. i appreciate how seamlessly he goes from annoying comic relief to tragic to a near-complete monster to atoner to genuine friend to the main cast. in the span of less than 50 EPISODES too, wtf. not to mention he’s the other half of one of my fav. fictional ships & great with kids to boot. there’s little i Don’t like about that little man (or big man, depending on what form he’s in).

👾 renamon / sakuyamon — would defend her with my life tbqh. anyone who reduces her to being an uwu sexy furry bait or an extension of the people she cares about i will bite the FUCK out of you. she’s so much more than that & had a whole arc of her own, if not one of the best ones of the series, but people won’t mention it or all the interesting implicative lore surrounding her because she’s quiet or because they’re too busy ogling her. big sigh

👾 mitsuo yamaki — why does no one TALK ABOUT THIS DUDE. not only is he super funny in the english dub but his character development is fantastic in both versions of the show. (seeing a pattern here?) i love that he goes from a well-intentioned extremist to a villain to a weird uncle figure to the kids. he deserves way more attention than he gets & i get so excited every time i see fans acknowledging him at all 😔

honourable mentions: jeri katou / juri katou, janyu wong / janyu li zhenyu, terriermon, calumon / culumon, henry wong / lee jianliang, leomon.

[evoblue]

time capsule thread: a reunion a long time coming with @/twilighttheater

summary: a bracelet of forget-me-nots and an unlikely revelation at the Goldenrod Grand Gala are not enough to fully mend the rift between two pining childhood friends, but it's at least a good start.

Red knows he wasn't really formally asked by her, it was a simple invite, but he had really done the best he could to match with Blue in a unique way. It takes a moment before he spots her in the crowd and waves, even without the corsage behind his back his forget-me-not boutonniere gives away his intentions even more than the suit itself.

"Quite a turnout," he says while approaching her with a smile. "You're right that it's not really my thing, but all the same I'm glad to be here. Thanks for inviting me."

—

She would be lying if she claimed that she hadn't been keeping an eye out for a certain wayward legendary trainer... Mew, he'd invaded her thoughts night and day since she'd gotten that note. 'See you there'... It wasn't exactly a promise but, surely, he'd still keep to his word?

Her desire to see him is still at war with her own anxieties, though. She wants to be close to him, yet at the same time, she's afraid of becoming so close that he could hurt her more just by disappearing again. As she's told herself countless times, she can't miss anyone if there isn't anyone there to miss... especially him. Why do things have to be complicated?

Despite her reservations, when she finally catches sight of him, her heart begins to race.

For some reason, she'd expected him to wear black or red to go with his ever-present trademark hat. Yet here he is, donning her colors for once. A crisp white suit with subtle, delicate silver patterns that draw the gaze in when they catch the light just right. The lapels? Blue. The unexpected boutonniere? Blue, in the form of forget-me-nots. Her colors. Her flowers. They match. Was that deliberate? But how would he have known? She hadn't posted previews of her dress anywhere on social media—

She doesn't dare think too much of it. She'd hate for any hopeful assumptions to blow up in her face.

By the time she's done processing his outfit, they're face to face. It's hard to find the words when she's met with the deep crimson of his eyes. When he smiles, it looks genuine despite his aversion to social functions. For some reason, that makes her happy.

"You came," she finally finds the words, maintaining her composure despite the way her heart is ricocheting within her ribcage. Once she wills herself to relax, her smile reaches her eyes. "Not that I doubted your word, but... I'm glad. It means a lot to me that you're here, and I'm sure my aunt and Rosa both share the sentiment."

While she's tempted to avoid it, she might as well address the Cooperajah in the room.

"It looks like we match. Funny, huh?" Despite wanting to bring it up, she doesn't broach the subject of him wearing her favorite flower. All she can think about is how he remembers after all these years. "You look good..." She pauses, her gaze turning fond, her smile teasing. "Even if your hat clashes a little."

—

He's trying not to overthink the way his heart leaps with how she's looking at him, he's never seen her look at him like that before. He'd been so nervous about if he was doing the right thing here, but seeing her face made him feel more sure. It was nice to see her smile so brightly.

He laughs when his hat is pointed out, using his free hand to briefly take it off his head just to hold it up. "Thank you, though no matter what I do I can't help at least one fashion crime huh? I could be doing worse at least."

"Not at all like you, and I know a reminder isn't necessary, you know this without anyone saying anything. But you do look radiant today, and I can't help pointing it out." He grins, "And you're right, I suppose we do match huh?" He's not going out of his way to try to appear innocently unaware of this matter, but he's not going out of his way to prove that he didn't have some idea about this either.

At least not right off, but he does decide after a moment that the suspense is getting to his nerves too much. He places his hat back onto his head properly, before bringing his hidden hand out from behind his back. He holds out a corsage decorated in her favorite flower and truly hopes he's not going to make a total fool of himself here.

"I thought you might like this too, providing I'm not interrupting your time with anyone else anyway."

—

Radiant...

Her face feels warm and it's stupid because it's not like she's unaware. Vanity is her curse so she knows exactly how she looked when she walked in through those doors, and compliments usually don't phase her. Why does it hit different when it comes to her longtime friend? The same friend who is now looking at her like that, matching her colors, and wearing her flowers.

Ah, right. Because he's owned a piece of her heart for the better part of the last ten years.

Even with her gears turning full-force from the moment she noticed his outfit, she's still not ready when he presents her with a corsage to match his boutonnière. More forget-me-nots.

Oh. Oh. This is absolutely deliberate. Red isn't like her, with her subtleties and burning what-ifs. Between the flowers and the words that follow, his intentions are clear.

He is asking her to be his date for tonight.

Her lips part to formulate a response but promptly seal back up as she realizes she doesn't really trust her voice right now. While this is her ultimate desired outcome, she's finding herself faltering. What does this mean?

Yes, he's here because she made a point to invite him specifically; he's one of her two VIPs for a reason. She so desperately wants him to be here tonight. But this, all of this... it's so much, all at once. She's brimming with nervous excitement, a thrill running down her spine, but a part of her is still hesitant. Is this just Red being friendly or is there a deeper meaning behind this gesture? He's always been sweet so she can't tell...

Regardless, she's kept him waiting for too long. Maybe she should stop overthinking things and let herself enjoy this moment, however brief. After all, whatever his reasons, Red came all this way and went all out.

"Thank you." She finally finds her voice, her gaze softening. "Though, you really didn't have to go through all this trouble just to ask me to be your date. You know you'll always come first for me."

Ah, that last part she hadn't meant to say quite so loud.

"A-anyway! I suppose I can find it in my heart to forgive your fashion crimes." She attempts a diversion and extends her hand to accept the flowers. Too late, she realizes her hands are trembling.

—

He can tell that she's shocked, and he didn't expect a response right off anyway. But admittedly he was beginning to question if she was looking for someone else to be her date for the gala. He would've understood if that had been the case, but he also can't deny his relief when she accepts the offer.

'You know you'll always come first for me.'

The statement goes through his mind several times over. Maybe at one time, he'd known something like that without question, but admittedly after his disappearing act, he hadn't felt so confident about it. In some way this was making amends, making up for lost time, and trying to make something apparent that he should've done so ages ago.

Her diversion didn't completely work, but he does laugh over her comment nonetheless. He goes to hold her hand and place the corsage onto her wrist when he notices her hand trembling and decides to hold onto her hand for a bit longer. He feels like he must be imagining things, but he's not particularly looking to let go if she is in fact feeling nervous.

"Kind of you, whatever would I be without my hat?" He jokes, he's not even going to begin to get into the argument of the fact he does have a touch of red on him. It holds about as much water as saying his Sygna Suit's blue flame matches Cinder while Mega Evolved.

"And I know I didn't have to make this a big deal, but I thought it'd be more fun for us this way."

He's still not giving his source on who gave him the information on her outfit. But his mind keeps going back to the words she let slip out, and he decides to use his nerve to actually comment on it.

"And...I appreciate hearing that, I feel the same towards you."

—

I feel the same towards you.

Those are words that she would love to hear in a different context and it kills her because hearing Red say that while looking at her like that (as if she were the only star he sees… she must’ve had a drink too many…) and holding her hand as he slips a bracelet of forget-me-nots onto her wrist—all in an arguably very romantic setting—should be illegal. 

As she locks eyes with Red, breathing becomes just a little bit harder. He’s always had such beautiful eyes—crimson and warm, like flickering flames in the hearth of a place she’d call home, if such a place even existed. 

The rational part of her tells her to snap out of it; the bitterly hurt and afraid part of her cries for her to withdraw. However, despite the myriad of complex emotions she’s experiencing all at once, the warmth of his touch is grounding. She’s so good at goodbyes, so talented at running away from anything or anyone she could remotely become attached to… but to him, she gravitates like a willing satellite, despite him being capable of hurting her more deeply than anyone else.

He could do it again, too. It would be so easy for him to just go no-contact and drop off the face of the Earth, as he so often tends to do. So easy for him to shatter her already fractured heart into a thousand more fragments, despite her best attempts to piece herself together following his re-entrance into her life. Blue wants to believe in him, though. She wants to believe in the sweet boy she remembers from her childhood, in the man that flew to Sinnoh and arrived on her doorstep unannounced without knowing if she’d even open the door for him or not. And gods know she really didn’t have to, but…

For him, what wouldn’t she do? Even as just friends…

Right. Before her thoughts get carried away even further, she reluctantly pulls her hand from his grasp under the guise of adjusting his boutonnière. It’s yet another mistake, though, for it brings her in far too close. She clears her throat and smooths down his lapels before pulling herself away. “There, perfect.”

Despite Red being what most would consider a “high profile” guest, it doesn’t seem like their encounter has drawn too much attention. Mercifully, the rest of the guests seem engrossed in the various forms of entertainment that she and her staff had prepared for the night. Blue craves a moment to herself, though, just to process everything, clear her head, and raise her shields up. She’s tempted to slip back into her role as hostess but the flowers on her wrist remind her that she has actually committed to spending most of the night by Red’s side. It’s what she wants, but is it what's best for her?

“Can I show you around?” she finally offers before the silence between them becomes awkward. “I know my aunt’s exhibit better than anyone. Or, if you’re hungry, we could make our way over to the hors d'oeuvres?”

She nods her head toward the snack table, where Rosa seems to be happily stuffing her face with assorted mochi alongside someone she doesn't recognize.

—

He was so bad at reading people's expressions at times when they were younger, he looks back now and realizes how many times he should've noticed just how Blue looked at him. When he saw her again in Sinnoh all he could see on her face was the hurt he'd left her with, that he wanted so badly to make up for. Yet now... it feels so nostalgic, he looks into her eyes and sees the clear sky; lit up almost just like before. He doesn't expect this day to restore everything, not after all the hurt he did... but he can't deny the hope he has seeing this.

When she moves her hand he doesn't expect her to get closer to him, moving towards adjusting his boutonnière. She gives the impression on the surface of doing just that, but part of him also takes it as a way of trying to keep things off her mind. He knows she can be avoidant at times, it's a vice that they both share but in different ways. This form of avoiding however was a little funny, considering she's close enough for him to catch the scent of her perfume; he doesn't know them that well but he catches hints of lotus flowers. Suits her, he thinks, reminds him of running through the forest with her before.

But as much as the past was sweet with nostalgia, he did intend on staying in the moment. He did say he wanted to make amends after all, somehow some way.

He can't help being slightly proud still of his choice when she says 'perfect', as silly as it may have been. He'd been about to ask where they should start when she beats him to it, and he does glance over where Blue gestures to, noticing his sister talking with someone already... he kind of recognizes that guy. No name comes to mind though.

"We can catch up with Rosa later, I did primarily come to this to see you after all." No sense in being shy about it, she invited him and he wasn't going to waste too much time if he could help it. "I'd love to see your aunt's exhibit to start with, I've been wondering about it some."

—

Oh, that's surprising. Considering how many of their mutual friends were in attendance, she'd figured Red would be eager to catch up with them, especially with his sister. But instead, he wants to spend time with her.

I did primarily come to see you, after all.

Arceus, can he stop saying sweet things like that? It just makes everything harder.

A flash of pink suddenly draws her attention and she finds herself staring at Rosa from across the room. The Unovan champion cants her head, brows raised and lips quirked in question as her gaze flicks between her and Red. Feeling her cheeks grow warm, Blue takes Red's arm and leads him away before he has the time to catch the implications of that particular exchange.

"Here, follow me."

The hallway that contains most of her aunt's works is not too far away; however, its walls do a good job of muffling the chatter and music coming from the main hall. It allows for a bit of privacy and much easier conversation. While the thought of being alone with Red does things to her heart right now, so soon after the flowery gift, she's grateful for the calmer atmosphere. She regrets not being able to quell her nerves with a drink, though.

Mostly acrylic paintings and watercolors line the walls, with many of them depicting Kanto landmarks and pokémon. It seems like as good a place as any to start. The painting that catches her eye first is one of a fiery sunset, with the golden sun disappearing into the horizon while painting the ocean in streaks of red, pink, and orange.

"Route 21, just south of Pallet. Remember when we used to sit on the beach, splashing our feet in the water while we talked about silly kid things until the sun went down?" Those were the dog days of summer, a simpler time when their trio was still tight-knit. She sometimes wishes she could return to that time.

The painting right next to it appears to be Viridian Forest and it depicts a bug catcher in the act of netting an odd-colored Butterfree. Blue knows well that the scene didn't end well for the bug catcher, since the Butterfree had hit them with a Whirlwind before fleeing.

"I was there the day my aunt took the reference picture for that one. That bug catcher ended up in that bush back there," she smiles mirthfully as she points at a group of shrubs ripe with Leppa berries.

“Also, that Butterfree was indeed shiny. I ended up catching it later in the day; he keeps Aunt Azami company to this day.” It had been Blue’s first shiny capture and she’d been thrilled to share the experience with her aunt.

“And this—oh,” she pauses, suddenly tight-lipped as she comes across the largest painting on the wall. The painting is titled “Journey Together” and it depicts a pair of children as seen from the back, donning their eponymous colors and holding hands as they walk down a winding road. Their features are ambiguous but she highly suspects they're meant to be her and Red.

When did her aunt paint this? She doesn't remember seeing it before.

—

He'd really only caught a glimpse of Rosa's look before Blue took his arm to lead him in the direction of the paintings, not nearly enough of a look to fully see the context of the exchange between them. He's barely able to get a wave out to her before he returns his attention to Blue, and glances at the paintings they were passing by on the way. No names or pictures he recognized, not until they arrived at Azami's works anyway...she'd clearly been busy, he can't imagine how much time went into every single painting.

He listens and nods. "I remember, times like that are why I still love sunsets." He admits though he wonders about how sentimental he should really be. He couldn't lie though, thinking about staying out until the golden hours of the evening made for some of the best memories of his early childhood.

He snickers listening to the story about the bugcatcher. "I'll have to see this Butterfree sometime, but she did a really amazing job on this background."

But then his attention is fully brought to a painting that evidently Blue hadn't expected, larger than any of the others around. He doesn't want to assume anything... but when the clothing of the two children resembles their outfits from the past so much; he can't help but wonder what was going through Azami's mind while painting this.

It's idyllic, to the point that he almost wishes this had properly been how things went. But the statement he feels she may have been trying to make is still understood loud and clear, and though he's not sure if he should overstep, he still tries to hold onto Blue's hand in mirror to the painting.

"The first one was nice but, this one is really nostalgic." He loosely tries to justify his actions with a soft smile, "makes me think of the times that we did meet up on the way through Kanto."

Brief moments mostly, but they'd meant a lot to him. Even if today turned out to be similar, he'd still feel the same about it.

—

Red’s touch is as unexpected as the sight of the painting had been; the brush of his hands feels electric, tingling sparks blooming where their fingers join. Though her first instinct is to pull away from the intimate touch, she doesn’t. We need this as friends, she tells herself as she gives his hand a squeeze, as if that isn’t an excuse for her to chase her own reckless desires against her better judgment. 

Feeling helpless at the sight of his smile, she exhales softly.

“I sometimes wish we’d actually traveled together… y’know, instead of racing each other to the top.” Maybe then, Red wouldn’t have felt like he needed to take on the weight of the world upon his shoulders alone. The latter was in the spirit of rivalry, sure, but that had always been heavily pushed by Green… and look where that had landed him. Them. All three of them are a mess.

Despite her own wishes, she doesn’t linger. Her hand slips through Red’s fingers like sand as she reluctantly pulls away. Her arms then fold over her chest while she retreats behind the walls of her fortress, all under the guise of admiring the artwork lining the remainder of the hallway. It’s uncanny how cold the space suddenly feels without him by her side. She finds herself aching for that small little touch, however brief it had been.

It’s so hard to pretend like she doesn’t feel anything.

“I admire her, you know?” she says softly, now standing before a painting of Snorlax placidly napping across a road she recognizes to be just outside Celadon. It's her best attempt at redirecting the subject to something neutral. “And maybe even envy her a little. I’ve always wished I had any talent for the visual arts… if you took a peek at my research journal, you’ll find I’m pretty much the opposite. Even my doodles are ugly as hell.”

—

The statement almost surprises him. Almost.

In a way, he looks back on it and he can almost imagine that sort of want if he hadn't been so focused on his goal of becoming Champion; focused on racing Green to the very top in particular. The thought leaves him feeling cold very fast as she lets go of his hand, yet another moment to slip away from him it seems.

"I sometimes wish the same." He softly admits, but it seems she's moving on to looking at the rest of the paintings. He won't linger on it if she doesn't want to.

He looks over at the next painting, and he remembers moments like this where he had to wake up wild Snorlaxes on the road. Always made for a fun battle to happen out of nowhere, but he listens more to Blue changing the subject. Idly, he hopes he hasn't made her feel too strange over his comments, but he also felt he shouldn't keep things like this to himself anymore. Doing that hasn't exactly gotten him anywhere.

"I'm not much better, I do like to draw on occasion but... nothing like this. I don't know if I'd have the patience to hone the skill, and sit in one place to work on something like this for hours."

"So I suppose I admire her too, it takes a lot of dedication, I'm sure."

—

Red’s affirmation hangs in the air and she holds her breath. Despite her own attempts at changing the subject, a part of her hopes he’ll elaborate and maybe clue her in as to what was going through his mind during their gym circuit. Not for the first time she finds herself wondering if she ever haunted his thoughts while they were apart.

Mentally, she scoffs at herself. Unlikely… back in the day, Red’s brain was oversaturated with thoughts of pokémon battles and maybe taking down Team Rocket. But what about now—

Stop. Don’t think about it, she chides herself, though the strand of forget-me-nots on her wrist already answers the question. Blue straightens, willing the fluttery nervous feeling in her gut to go back the way it came.

“I don't know where she gets them from but my aunt has always had heaps of patience,” she nods. “It’s almost like a requirement for anyone who would willingly choose to live out their days in a sleepy town like Pallet. That being said, one can’t deny her dedication produces results.”

While plenty of artists struggle with backgrounds, Azami’s rich landscapes and backdrops are as striking as the subjects of her paintings. It’s most evident in the Viridian Forest piece and in the majority of the paintings down the far end of the hallway. Blue leads Red down the remainder of the art-lined path, not too far ahead from him, but just enough to be out of reach. They’re almost done with this section of the gallery so, hopefully, she can redirect them back to the main hall where there are other people and plenty of distractions. She couldn't have predicted the avalanche of thoughts and feelings that now attempt to smother her and make her alone time with Red so torturous; had she known about the Journey Together painting, she probably wouldn’t have—

Oh, oh no. What is this?

To her horror, she finds herself face to face with an exquisite depiction of Mount Silver. The snow-capped mountain is beautifully rendered in shades of grays and purples as its conical form rises gracefully toward the clouds. Winter storm clouds, she thinks idly, recalling the familiar sight. Before she can even begin to wonder how the sight of the mountain will affect Red, her eyes drift to the painting alongside this one and she freezes in place.

Searching For The Flickering Flame is the title of the piece and, for the second time today, Blue wonders when exactly her aunt had painted this. A brunette girl takes center stage, dressed warmly with a thick scarf around her neck, her hair tossed by a wintry gust as she trudges through the snow alongside a Ninetales. Though her eyes are obscured, a distinct expression of despair mars her otherwise ambiguous features. Blue covers her mouth with her hand. It’s her, climbing the accursed mountain searching for Red all those years ago.

When Red reaches her, all she can do is avoid his gaze. Will he connect the dots?

—

For now he's doing his best to not overthink about Pallet Town when it's mentioned, as much as Blue has a point he's still... dealing with some things about that place. Both from his personal feelings and things he'd had to look into recently, but he hums in agreement regardless as they move on to the next set of paintings. Though nothing could've prepared him for the one he'd be face to face with first.

Mt. Silver.

Even in a painting he feels its haunting allure, as though the freezing winds pass by him even now; like a far off memory yet it still comes through so clearly. He still feels called back to it at times, there's some part of him that lingers still on that mountain even so long after being dragged back down. But he's made too many promises to the people he cares for, to risk going back up there and losing track of his life all over again.

He feels like he's rejecting unseen hands reaching out to him from the painting, adamantly looking over to the next one--

Hold on.

His mind snaps out of it entirely, freed from his ghosts only to witness what seems like a clear sign. These two paintings are clearly meant to be side by side, the coloring to the background is exactly the same as the mountain... and even in a painting, he recognizes the figure is meant to be Blue.

He wants to ask when she went up there, and what exactly she was hoping to gain from it. But his gaze reaches the title of the painting itself, and he has his answer. Azami was after all, one of the very few people who called him by the name 'Fire' on occasion just for fun. He'd mostly always taken it as a joke for him picking Charmander, but it holds so much more weight to it behind this scenario.

From what he'd gathered so far, Azami painted things she'd seen and experienced, or ideal scenarios. There was nothing ideal about the expression on Blue's face here, his chest hurts at the very idea.

"...You went looking for me," he speaks softly, almost in disbelief. He'd never known, and part of him feels like were it not for this? She may not have ever told either.

—

Blue has no right to feel hurt at the utterly incredulous look on his face; after all, she deliberately kept her search from him. That being said, even though she had her reasons, the shock on his face — as if the thought of her going after him had never even crossed his mind — still stings.

Suddenly overcome with emotion, she bites down on her quivering bottom lip and averts her eyes.

"Of course I did," she replies, her voice wavering. I loved you. You were the most important person in my life. "How could I NOT?"

And just like that, it all comes back to her. She'd been in Mahogany Town when the news broke followed by a whirlwind of nasty rumors that Red had gone missing amid a snow storm and was most likely dead. Her life came to a screeching halt, her Johto circuit quickly forgotten as she shifted her focus to readying herself for the climb and finding him at all cost. She had to find him, she had to bring him back. Despite her diligence, though, nothing truly prepared her for the mountain's unforgiving punishment.

Mount Silver had fought her every step of the climb with sharp claws and gnashing teeth, with blisteringly cold gusts and merciless frozen rain and an altitude sickness so severe that sometimes the ground gave beneath her feet and her head felt like it was being squeezed in a vise.

With stark clarity, she can still recall the wind mercilessly buffeting her face, the painful loss of feeling in her extremities, and the suffocating ache in her chest at the thought that she might not find him. And yet, for two whole weeks, she searched the peak, desperately looking for signs of life and calling his name, her pleading cries swallowed into the vast nothingness. She had almost made it to the summit—

—and then the avalanche hit. That place had almost become her tomb and her Ninetales had been the only reason why she hadn't died buried underneath a sheet of snow and debris. In all, she's lucky to still be here but she still had to cope with her nightmares becoming reality when she'd haphazardly made her descent to safety, empty-handed.

"Even today, it tears me up inside knowing I was so close... and yet—"

How would things have turned out if her attempt hadn't resulted in utter failure?

—

His thoughts linger back to how he'd felt when he'd decided to climb the mountain, feeling it was better this way. That no one was likely to try to look for him, with how out of touch he'd become with his loved ones. But this had been wrong from the beginning, and he'd been too caught up in himself and handling it all on his own, to really consider the effect his vanishing would've had. He knew now, he'd already made himself clear to Blue before this point... but he'd never known she'd gone looking for him. Green never mentioned it, just that he was sick of Red's disappearing act.

Don't make things worse, leave her be, you caused this, his thoughts spun around in his mind but for once he didn't hear. So long as she would allow for it, he would attempt to reach for her and hold her close. A hug is not enough to make up for everything, but it's all he could think to do impulsively when he heard how her voice was breaking.

"I never should've put you in that position," he softly responds regardless. "You should've never had to go looking, and... I don't know if I'll ever be able to make up for that time. I'm sorry."

Pinpricks of tears, he can't believe he's doing this at the gala of all places. Thank Mew they've been alone in this corner of the gala at least, no one is really paying them any mind.

He gives an unsteady sigh. "For whatever it may be worth, I... wish it had been you, to find me." He's not sure he should even be saying this, but he continues. "I thought of you often while I was up there, memories, and conversations I'd wanted to have with you."

He feels he likely hallucinated her presence more than once when the cold and isolation really got to his mind, but let's not get into that.

"I know, if I'd just left then I would've never had to wonder." He frowns. "I never would've been keeping you waiting and put you in danger. I can't... take back the decisions I made back then."

"But... I'm here now, regardless. I guess in some sense, you ended up finding me again anyway."

—

For a fleeting moment, Blue's shoulders tense at the unexpected gesture. But she eventually stops fighting it, allowing him to pull her into an embrace that's long overdue. Her arms wrap around him tightly in turn, fingers curling into the creases of his jacket as she hides her face in the crook of his neck.

The rest of the venue feels miles away; it's just them now. It doesn't matter that she's spent the better portion of the last hour fighting the effervescent feelings that have been building up within her ribcage and have almost reached their bursting point. All of a sudden, that little voice in her head that's been screaming at her about emotional self-preservation is nowhere to be found as she loses herself in his arms.

He— he thought about her while he was up there? Often? Had she lingered in his thoughts the way the ghost of his absence had haunted hers? What had he thought? What would he have said to her if she'd been there, if she'd reached him?

"I wish I'd found you," she breathes against his neck, her grip on him tightening. "I would've given anything to bring you back home."

Home. What is that for him, for either of them? Pallet Town never quite felt like home to her, despite the treasured friendships she'd developed that now lay fractured at their feet. But this... the steadiness of Red's embrace, the gentleness in his voice, the warmth of his crimson eyes—

—This, for her, is home.

Maybe that's why losing him to the mountain had hurt so much in the first place; no matter the nature of their relationship, she's now certain that Red is her soulmate, and losing him had been like having a part of herself ripped out of her chest. How harrowing would it be to lose it all again? To lose him again? Mew, she can't possibly handle that, even as friends. It would kill her.

Oh, hell...

This is exactly why she'd been so reluctant to let him in again, why she'd insisted on keeping him at arm's length despite her heart longing for him. It's like all the shields she had carefully raised for her own protection have been shattered, leaving her vulnerable again. As it turns out, she just can't shut him out when her very soul beckons to him.

All it had taken was a well-placed painting.

Nevertheless, if they're to even begin truly mending their shattered relationship, she needs the assurance that he won't cut her out again. That much is non-negotiable.

She pulls back, her eyes searching his. "Red, can you promise me—"

And just like that, the moment bursts like a bubble.

The words die in her throat as the corridor suddenly goes black. Startled, she clings to Red as she waits for her vision to refocus. The lights are out and so is the music, replaced by a cacophony of startled cries as all the other guests in the main hall struggle to find their bearings.

Is this a power outage? Why haven't the backup generators kicked in?

—

There's a part of him that expects to be pushed away, as though he moved too fast for her to be okay with, even though it'd felt right in the moment. But he waits for it and it never comes, quite the opposite that shocks him with the fact this is actually happening. She would've been well in her rights to say she wasn't okay with this, but instead she's holding him just as tightly. Moreso than he'd ever known her to in his life.

He listens to her response, but he can't bring himself to say anything back no matter how much he wants to. He knows if he'd seen her back then there would've been no need to bring him home, Red had no true home as a place any longer. Rather she would've brought it with her just by being there, the chance to return with her would've been a return home no matter what.

He doesn't want to leave. If only things were as simple as that.

No matter what he tries his words are failing him, but when she speaks again to him he thinks he'll sign if he has to. Whatever he has to do to get the point across-- her question sounded like it had grave importance even within just a few words.

But the gala goes dark, and he reflexively holds her tighter to him when the cries of the guests start. Immediately his concern is about an unseen danger, but as his eyes adjust to the dark nothing seems to particularly stand out. Just a blackout? He hopes so, he lets up his grip on her only to at least try to take her hand.

"Let's go, try to see what's going on." His phrase is to the point, it's the most he can manage between his mess of thoughts and concerns about the blackout.

He wonders if he'll hear what she was going to say just now eventually. But it feels like a question that is going to haunt him for some time.

—

The situation couldn't possibly be more ill-timed. Their emotionally charged moment of revelation is now lost and, with both her and Red's sense of duty at play, her request will have to wait until some other time. Will she have the nerve to touch on that subject again, though?

In the dark, Red's hand finds hers and Blue holds onto it firmly. She can sense his unease, made only more obvious by the nuances in his voice, so she gives his hand a reassuring squeeze. Maybe there's hope for things feeling like normal between them after all these years.

"I'll go talk to my staff. Maybe they'll have an idea of what's going on." Hopefully, a normal blackout is all this is but she has her doubts. How does a venue in a metropolis lose all power, just like that?

Hmm, no matter. Whatever it is, she'll take care of it.

[alecsnotalex]

In the distant hall stretching by my side, I hear skateboards rattling and speeding by, footsteps taken by strangers, humming and swishing of wet umbrellas and clothing go unnoticed. Above me, the sky weeps, and I hear puddles splashing and forming. Right now, I am grateful for Mckay, for the shade, and for this bench I sit on.

Behind me, there's a "No Smoking" sign, you'd think would be a given for a university such as this one. But I guess there is no harm in extra precaution.

Last night, I was out with Caleb and some of his friends. They were all so nice, and funny. As if without troubles, they are such great people. I sat there people-watching. Pla ying games, trying to swallow really bad-tasting mixed-mango liquor. In its defense, it is liquor, it isn't supposed to taste good, but also, it was also the best-tasting liquor in Kahuku Beer Garden.

A few weeks ago, I got my nipples pierced. Those fuckers hurt so much, the thought of the much more plentiful pain of childbirth scared me. Thinking about it, it really is scary: not something I haven't figured out before. But having experienced such great physical pain somehow just makes it more real, as somehow, being a woman, it is inevitable to happen in the foreseeable future.

Fast forward to last night, Caleb and I were playing around, him buzzed, and me not so much, although it's evident that I do not take liquor well. We were play fighting and hugging and squeezing each other by the moonlight outside the parking lot, when he lifted me up and my piercing caught on his jumper. It hurt a lot. Looking back now, I don't know what got me so angry, but it scared me so much because his teasing got me mad, and he said I just "Switched."

I have not been most kind to most people i have loved throughout my life, but for him, I believe it to be different. Everything fits, and life is bliss. The last thing I want to do is ruin this good thing we have, the last thing I want to do is be mean to this man I love. It scares me a lot I once vowed never to have children because of my complicated relationship with my mother. Nature is just a lot to combat. Predispositions and genetics. I do not want to be like her.

And so, in all the ways I can, I try not to.

But right now, I am in university. I try not to think about things too much. Earlier, I went to the C-store earlier to buy Caleb nutella, as promised. I was debating whether i should grab lunch in there but $12 for a plate luncheon campus just seemed too ridiculous to me, so I headed to the cafeteria instead. Everybody hates it. The food is just not at all good. And caf people are just like RA's they're pure evil. But if there is something I hate more than bad food, and the shrewd people in there, it is the ghosts that you see floating around. People I've once shared fond memories with, now I only feel resentment for. I think about the past lovers I have had, and how coming out of them also meant cutting them off. Is this a cycle? A pattern? I envy how Caleb talks highly about people he's once loved, and how he is able to maintain a sense of admiration for them despite all that's happened.

Was I too unlucky to have had assholes before that I cannot hold them in the same regard, or am I the problem?

Either way, it is just too small a campus to keep avoiding, and some halls you have to walk in and share with them, especially in moments you do not want to.

This place is filled with ghosts, and I am deathly afraid of them. And so again, I do what I can.

I'll try not to think about it.

[togglessymposium]

An actual debate over who gets to decide what the category "relationship" means, where one side is claiming it's decided entirely by self-identification or internal experience, would look quite different, something we've never seen before on the broad-discourse-wide scale. It would look like a huge swath of people claiming, and centering their whole cause around the claim, that anyone who says they're in a true relationship Really Is in one entirely by virtue of believing they are.

<snipped the most relevant bit>

So, I found this thread again right after scrolling past, comma getting a sensible chuckle from, this post about the real-life cocaine bear and associated hijinks. Which was funny, because it helped highlight an important discrepancy in how you're framing relationships, and especially in how you frame conservatives as thinking of relationships. In this we have a clear counter-example in a law that specifically has a provision like "This marriage can't retroactively have been invalid; if everybody thought the wedding was real, it was real, even if it was officiated by a piece of taxidermy named Pablo Eskobear." This is, keep in mind, a Kentucky state law, a region not known for its patience for leftist theories of socially constructed identity.

I think one of the reasons this discussion struggles is that it has a fairly vague model of what marriage is. You're presenting it as primarily a legal status: people are married if the state says they're married. But of course, marriage predates the modern state by time immemorial, and in fact, as far as we know it predates the written word and the laws of Hammurabi. Nor does this fully account for strange edge cases like that odd period where a lot of people had their marriages recognized in Canada and not the United States, or where they had to plan vacations carefully to avoid states where gay couples lacked legal standing- but nobody, conservative or liberal, ever really believed that somebody's marital status changed when they crossed state lines. Either they thought that the marriage was going unrecognized in certain regions, or that the recognition was in error in certain regions. But at the same time, federal and state recognition of gay rights is clearly some kind of very strong ratchet in a way that's unusual in political discourse- they spent generations fighting back and forth about culture war issues like abortion and gun rights, but the entire anti-gay-rights movement just folded over the space of a decade or so.

A model, for your consideration, would be the following: as a species, we're monogamish, with most of us settling in to 2-person long term romantic relationships that provide childrearing, security and other forms of social insurance. Deviations from this model are common, indeed expected- polyamory (especially polygamy, historically), protracted celibacy, infidelity to the relationship, etc. And even within this broad pattern, differences emerge in things like the length of the relationship or the power dynamics within it; relationships, while advantageous, are also brittle, especially under stress, and in most cases can be unilaterally ended by at least one of the partners. So, very early on, we developed the social technology of the marriage, enabled by and indeed dependent on the associated idea of the wedding. Here, in a big social gathering and in the presence of recognized community leaders, the relationship partners declare to the community that the relationship exists, most commonly with a few simple additional terms such as lifelong commitment by both parties, sexual fidelity, etc., and use the fact of that publicity and common knowledge to create lots of external pressure to maintain the social bond. Now, instead of one party being able to end things unilaterally, they have to overcome significant social pressure (and shame!), allowing those inside the relationship to act with a greater degree of trust that the social insurance functions of the relationship will persist during times of difficulty.

This will generally come with certain privileges such as not being separated from one another and being treated as a family unit; partly on the community's own 'don't be a jerk' principles and partly, where society has gotten to the point of having formal laws, in the form of codified respect and legal accommodation. In a modern liberal state, especially a fairly atomized one, we rely more on institutional recognition than on community acclaim, just because the community bonds themselves are much weaker- for example, if you were to divorce your wife after she got a cancer diagnosis, there would be a sort of background horror and disdain at your actions for you to deal with, but your wife's family would struggle to outright ruin your livelihood or anything. But in all cases, a marriage remains in essence the common-knowledge recognition of a romantic or sexual relationship; when we describe marriage variably as a government institution or religious ritual, we're describing the tension between state and church institutions in declaring our social canon. This is why a socially conservative bastion like Kentucky is capable of letting people get married by Cocaine Bear- marriage may be socially constructed, but it's an entry in a commonly held social ledger, not a personal definition between a few individuals.

In the case of gay marriage, this makes 'coming out' an extremely clever way to outflank the opposition. The reason why conservatives talked awkwardly around gay relationships during the 90s and 00s, is that every time they did, they lost points in the game of whether gay marriages gained public recognition- to describe a gay relationship using any standard terminology like 'boyfriend' was essentially to participate in the social recognition of the relationship, and hence to make it more marriage-like. Thus, constant descriptions of gay people 'playing house,' and a necessary obsessive focus on the ontological impossibility of romantic love between gay people. You need both of those things just to be (productively) on the anti-gay side of the marriage debate at all. Thus, active resentment of public declarations of homosexuality, holding hands in public as 'shoving it down our throats', etc. And on the other hand, merely having the debate around gay marriage also means that you're winning the debate on gay marriage, because by definition you're expanding the common-knowledge recognition of your existing relationship.

I was around and an adult for the '04 presidential race, where opposition to gay marriage was a tent pole of Rove's successful strategy. (The only race in the last 30 years that the GOP actually won more votes for the presidency than the DNC, in fact.) And believe me, it sucked beyond measure. But with nineteen years of hindsight, it was also in a paradoxical way the turning point- in other words, the mainstreaming of anti-gay lawmaking has the curious side effect of providing many of the core benefits of a wedding! It forced the nation as a whole to acknowledge the basic existence of these relationships, and from there the dominoes began to fall very quickly. The recognition of gay marriages by the federal government some decade later wasn't a signal that they were losing- it was the signal that they had lost, that the nation had allowed the existence of gay romantic partnerships in to its social canon. But simply overturning that SCOTUS decision will not be sufficient to reverse the canon itself; the horse, as it were, is out of the barn. (I also suspect, for the record, that this factors in to why we hesitate to publicize crimes of a sexual nature, even to the point of writing laws about 'sexual immorality' that are deliberately vague. We have a lurking instinct that we cannot publicize cases of child sexual assault, bestiality, incest, etc., without also solemnizing them, i.e., making them more marriage-like.)

As to how this relates to the more recent debates about trans identity and trans rights, I'm probably not in a position to make useful or novel insights. But the distinction between private, intuitive identity, and public, social-canon identity, is obviously relevant for the subject, even if trans and anti-trans people don't always make a distinction between the two in a clear way.

Back in the 90s, and remaining even today as a remnant, there was an ongoing conversation in the gay community about whether we ought to push for gay marriage, or whether we ought in a more revolutionary sense to abolish marriage as a state and social institution outright. The pro-marriage side ultimately won, of course. My gut says that, in these terms, the trans community is sort of still having this debate, and it's less obvious that the (integrationist) side that wants to amend the social canon is winning over the (abolitionist) side that wants to simply do away with community oversight entirely. As to what happens if trans people align behind the latter, as opposed to the gay community's ultimate acceptance of the former, I really couldn't say- it's less well-charted territory and would weaken the analogy between gay rights and trans rights as legal and social projects.

Half a year ago, I got myself involved in a thread which compared trans rights to gay rights and tried to make a case that, in terms of arguments for each, the issues are not as directly comparable as a lot of people seem to think. A lot of my perspective comes from a sort of an empathy I feel with the non- religiously conservative, non- radical feminist motivations for doubting some of what this social movement is pushing for, particularly with regard to its disconnect with how more traditional people view identity categories.

This portion of a recent interview on the YouTube channel Nonzero (see until 47:43) is a stunningly crystal-clear illustration of the attitude and motivation I was trying to describe at the time, so much so that I think it's instructive and kind of fascinating to watch, even if it's almost so extreme and ridiculous as to come across as parody. (Warning: a certain kind of non-conservative, non-TERFy transphobia, which I'll quote bits of below.)

The interviewee, Norman Finkelstein, feels violently averse to using "they/them" pronouns purely because it would be implicitly affirming what in his mind is an untruth. (Presumably he would not want to refer to a male-presenting student as "she" or a female-presenting student as "he", for a similar reason, but this doesn't directly come up.) He appears to have no other motive, but the motive of not liking to "play along" with someone else's factual untruth is plenty for him. There is no particular social conservatism evident in him; he states plainly that he's fine with androgyny, of people dressing/presenting any way they wish, and that stuff doesn't bother him in the slightest, because that doesn't involve saying things that are untrue. Politically and philosophically he is obviously left-leaning, pro-science, and non/anti-religious in most areas: he repeatedly likens affirming someone's gender identity to affirming that the world is flat or that climate change isn't real or "all the craziness you attribute to the Trump base". Not pronouncing things that imply a factual untruth or deny objective reality is sacred to him as a professor and an intellectual, is what he is saying.

Also, this:

I'm not insulting anyone. If I'm calling you a "he", it's not like I'm calling you the N word or I'm calling you a c*** or something. It's just a relatively stable identifier.

Notice how completely uncomprehending Finkelstein is of the notion that not affirming someone's claimed identity (on the basis of what he believes to be objective reality or established definitions of words) could possibly be an insult or convey lack of respect or qualify as dehumanizing treatment of someone else. That a refusal to affirm someone's claimed identity (on the basis that it denies objective reality) is somehow a form of dehumanization is a completely unfathomable concept to many.

Now I find Finkelstein's perspective flawed on at least half a dozen counts, and fallacious on a particular fundamental level in conflating different types of "objective facts" (something that Robert Wright, who takes a much more reasonable, kind, and open-minded agnostic view on all of this, gently tried to push back on him about). I do think Finkelstein had some good points later in the excerpt about not forcing jarring changes in language down everyone's throats -- this is how I feel about artificial and ugly terms like Latinx, for instance, and I would have had some issues with xie/xir and the like becoming widespread nonbinary pronouns -- but in my opinion these points can't be applied well to using singular "they" for nonbinary people. Moreover, Finkelstein comes across as hardly more than a crusty, curmudgeonly jackass throughout, one who proudly and stubbornly adheres to a disagreeable absolutist view and refuses to open his mind to where his defense of that view might be flawed.

(More minor point: in arguing that mispronouning someone isn't a form of insult, he compares it to factually saying someone's hair is white or that their muscular dystrophy will prevent them from running a 4-minute mile. But, while maybe "insult" or "dehumanization" wouldn't be the best way to describe these things, they are certainly rude in certain contexts: you probably shouldn't call attention to someone's hair being white if they are sensitive about aging, for instance. Similarly, calling a nonbinary but male-presenting person "he" is pretty unkind if they don't want to present as male and are sensitive about it. But Finkelstein clearly isn't the kind of person to prioritize others' feelings over his duty towards "objective reality" in this way.)

But I contend that this is simply an extreme and rather dickish version of how tons and tons of people think, because in terms of the history of social justice and civil rights movements, it is brand new for a movement to be so heavily based in the objective truth of internally-felt identities and accusing people of fundamental dehumanization when they refuse to affirm them. And yet, activist rhetoric sounds as if this is simply part of how identities always worked and what dehumanization always meant, rather than something that appeared on the scene just yesterday.

There is certainly still a major constituency of conservatively religious people who believe that everyone should only do with their bodies what their bodies were "created to do" or whatever, but conservative Christianity is very weakened in our culture since it lost the last major culture war, and I think a lot of people in that camp still also fall into the category of finding it incomprehensible nonsense to say that an identity category is whatever each of us says it is and that it's dehumanizing ever to imply otherwise. I believe it's simply a misconception to assume that the pushback against trans activism is comprised mainly of fundamentalists and TERFs. Norman Finkelstein is an (albeit extreme) example of someone who appears to be neither, and my perception at least in the US is that most people are neither, but that a great many Americans, if not a majority, don't really get the "identity is whatever you say it is" concept and at best are bemusedly humoring it as long as it doesn't get too much into their faces.

(On each day of this past weekend, I was in a different public place -- a bar restaurant and a coffee shop -- and overheard part of a conversation about how "the people in such-and-such social group over there all ask about and share pronouns and a bunch of them go by 'they'", and in context this wasn't being attacked in any way, but it was being treated as bemusing and only semi-comprehensible.)

As Tumblr user Bambamramfan once said, people (particularly scientific-minded, non-faith-y people) really don't like to assert things they don't actually believe (don't have time to look up the post right now; the way they phrased it was something like "Americans don't like to lie about what they believe" and it was in the context of lesser-of-two-evils voting, a topic on which I emphatically disagreed with Bambambramfan, but I consider that particular point to be wise). I wish this were more recognized in social justice activism communities in general, and both that more rhetoric were crafted and ideological assumptions were more carefully examined with it in mind.

I'll end by saying, as I've probably said before, that I'm not claiming just because certain ideological assumptions in trans right activism are fundamentally brand new, that they are wrong or shouldn't become adopted by the wider community. Lots of fundamental ideological assumptions that we are obviously better off for making the default, such as "people owning other people is a gross moral evil", were once brand new at least on a society-wide scale. What I complain about is activists completely refusing to acknowledge or even be aware of this novelty, and so refusing to critically examine it, to defend it on its own merits, or to meet others where they're at.

[excaive]

I am ON MY KNEES begging you to explain some parasite lore! Jk, tho I would love to know!! Please

Since you asked I can explain a bit! :3

I've never really properly explained so I'll try and give an overview.

[if you haven't read my short comic Lasting Bonds, that gives insight into some parasite history also]

Parasites in my universe are Kin of Kqo'twec, also known as The Parasite God

They're just a funky creature that might be a bit radioactive, don't worry about it. Being a parasite themself, they infected Keith Sun, gang leader of Black Orbit when they were bleeding out in a ditch lol lucky them.

Kqo'twec and Keith at some point become interchangable. Funny how that works (points at my blog title)

Anyway!

Parasites are divided into two categories: Minor & Major

MINOR parasites are smaller parasites that give a few minor attributes - changing eye color, hair color, giving horns, sharp teeth, tails, claws etc. These are very low maintanance and practically everyone has at least one of some sort, but people don't think much of it bc it's just normal. They're just vibing and as long as you're chill with them and respect them, then the attributes will be maintained. These don't have like. a physical look or body to them (that can be perceived with the naked eye), they're kinda just the concept of giving abilities. Or I mean you can pull out a microscope and check them out, that's just A Shape.

MAJOR parasites are companions! They have a conscience and you need to work with them to maintain a good bond with them. That's ur life buddy. Their attributes are more connected with each other, if that makes sense. For example, transformative parasites are common - parasite that allow their host to physically transform into another form, fully or partially. A parasite could be like. snake adjacent and give you snake-like attributes. Slit pupils, scales, tail and fangs. Those are all attributes from that parasite.

Compared to minor parasites, you could have a couple of minor parasites that give attributes that aren't following the same theme. like you could have goat-like horns and a reptile-like tail, they're just coming from different parasites.

Minor and Major parasites can also compliment each other! If we go with the snake-like attributes again, you could get a minor parasite that could change the scale patterns or pupil shape. it's like pretty customizable lol

Speaking of customization, there are also Modified Minor & Major parasites. Currently it's mainly modified minor parasites on the parasite market bc it's kind of controversial modifying major parasites (but that's not stopping The Company from experimenting with it lol)

This is the major conflict in Black Orbit. It kinda fucks up the natural way of how parasites have been treated since Kqo'twec bestowed the knowledge of them onto the ancestors.

Modified parasites aren't healthy and some get packed with more attributes than they naturally can give + the general public begins to see them (minor parasites) as accessories they can switch out or discard rather than littol cool creatures that make you look dope, which worsens the bond between host and parasite, being very imbalanced - or not there at all. So they don't live that long and their attributes might be "weaker" or quickly fade (dull colors or like. brittle horns) ""luckily"" you can easily extract them and replace them at Parasite Clinics.

The only character with a modified major parasite that I've talked about is Cass. She has a dragon parasite, which. is a whole other can of worms tbh. It's in an artificial coma and its attributes are what is giving her the half dragon appearance and size (she's also full of minor modified parasites that made her beefy lol) so that's definitely not gonna bite her in the ass at some point! It's ok tho bc she's so sexy <3

You might think 'wait isn't a dragon parasite just a transformative parasite then?' which isn't incorrect but. They're special little guys with other requirements than most parasites, and in the city of Sunjin (which the main conflict of Black Orbit takes place) they are not well understood and there's little information about them (well. outside of the B.O.A - the Black Orbit Archives which holds documents and practically the whole history of Kqo'twec's Kin, but only archivists/oathbearers have access to that place.) Keith is so mad about how reckless Cass is with parasites but. well..[gestures at this picture]

I think that's enough for an overview!

[realm-of-rosie]

✎ Softy Hours | Genshin Impact

↠ Diluc, Tohma, Ayato, Xiao × Reader

↠ Fluff | Scenario

↠ Before You Read:

more brainroooooot hello, im supposed to be sleeping so i can have breakfast with my siblings later for the lolz oh well, brainrot doesnt exactly let you sleep-

AND AYATO SIMPS ARE FUNNY BECAUSE CANONICALLY, HE DOESNT HAVE A FACE OR PHYSICAL PRESENCE- anyway, im hilarious because im totally in love with the version of him in my head 🥰🤡

↠ Rules for Requesting | Masterlist

• diluc teaching you how to play the card games he learned from his father and the older knights when he still was a member of the knights of favonius one stormy night under candlelight to ease yours and his boredom while the rain beat on the windows of the dawn winery.

seeing a familiar and almost forgotten gleam of excitement and amusement in your eyes - the same one his elders used to tease him about - the more you play and the more you win, his heart tells him that playing with the intricately designed cards with slightly worn out edges doesn't need to be a bittersweet memory anymore.

• tohma with a habit of kissing every part of your face except your lips. your eyelids, your cheeks, your nose, the side of your lips, your forehead, but not your lips. or at least, he tends to save your lips for last.

secondly, he loves penguin kisses. tohma's nose rubs against yours affectionately, his lips just barely hovering above yours nothing but a breath away and they form a smirk when you frown and swat at his chest. he takes his time to shower you in love and adoration, and to him, the kiss on the lips are the final seal before he sends you on your way packed with the fluttering sensation of affection on your skin.

• ayato doesn't even try to maintain his composure or act like the proper gentleman he was during the meeting he just had 5 minutes ago. he relaxes, he eases up, whatever front he puts up falls apart because with you, there's no need for it.

during dinner, he pretends to wipe away the bit of sauce that smeared on your cheek, only to sneakily smear even more and laugh at the scandalized look on your face. ayato pretends to loudly snore when you're barely on the brink of falling asleep and narrowly dodges your drowsy attempts to clamp your hand over his mouth and goes to sleep with a smile on his face and his hand slowly dragging up and down your back.

• xiao and the process of getting comfortable with you. he slowly has to ease into it of course, scared of rubbing off his karma and bad luck onto you.

but when he does, you wake up in the middle of the night to feel his nimble fingers slipping under your shirt to gently rub his thumb over the swell of your hips. he kisses your palm while he traces patterns on and reads your fortune from it, xiao would abruptly kiss the back when he had it intertwined with his. verbal affection through metaphors and other figures of speech, all translating to forms of i love you, i care for you, i adore you and all other terms of endearment, sometimes in a language unfamiliar to you, leave his lips.

[elsieys-blog]

Perks of an insomnia-driven night.

Draco Malfoy x ravenclaw!reader

a/n: hi hello, this is my first draco malfoy au and I hope you get to enjoy it as much as I wrote it <3

contains: fluff, tension, cussing, insomnia, room of requirement, Draco's rings, and strangers to friends with benefits.

summary: due to another insomnia-driven night, you strolled and suddenly bumped into a particular Slytherin. He gave you a gift you would cherish forever.

———————————————————

A loud buzz from outside startled you as you curled up on your bed, pulling the blanket up to your torso to suppress the chilly weather. You couldn't keep count on how many times you've tried to close your eyes and think as if you went into a free fall in hopes of getting yourself adrift. But no. You've closed your eyes, opened it again, flat it again but it didn't help at all. You were widely awake despite the fact you hadn't eaten any chocolate at all.

You heaved a sigh before deciding to leave your bed and go on for a short walk on the dimly lit hallways. Perhaps the calmness and stillness of it would soothe you. You pushed the duvet away from your nearly naked body and slipped your slippers onto your feet. Standing up, you went over to the bathroom, did some basic hygiene before twisting the doorknob and leaving your dormitory in a swift.

God, even the Ravenclaw common room didn't look fancy anymore.

It usually does every morning to dawn. But every midnight and pass midnight? It looks like as though someone was murdered and students ought to stay hidden in their dorms.

As your quiet and soft trudges echoed the walls, only a few line of torches lighting your way, you exited the Ravenclaw common room and was now and finally outside. The hallways were now bigger and neverending, as if you had set foot into a deja Vu. A few floorboards you step creaked and so the snoring portraits on every corner and side of the wall yawns and went back to sleep.

You maintained a good slow and calm pace until you forgot to pick up your wand from your room. There was no going back now because it was a long way back. Now you had to squint your eyes so that it adjusted from the pitch black darkness.

Loud cawing from crows scare you sometimes so goosebumps prickled your skin. The only thing you could see was the dots of glitter from the sky and the shadows the oak trees casted on the ground. The shadow was formed strangely and it looks distorted so you held a deep breath, reminding myself that there was nothing to be bothered of. And that everyone was sleeping just fine.

As you walked silently, your head elbow-deep in thoughts, you didn't know you were now staring at a wall so called the Room of Requirement. The walls was approximately fifteen feet, bizarre patterns across it.

"Well, there's nothing else to go, so. . ." Your mind spoke and you closed your eyes, thinking of a plausible reason to get yourself inside. After a few seconds, you heard three faint clicks until the wall molded into a tall door. You glanced sideways before entering the room slowly.

You were met by the darkness once again, but this time it felt comforting. You walked and walked, taking in the unblemished and grubby furnitures hidden beyond the tall door. There were stacks and mounds of unused things that you felt suddenly guilty. As you roamed around without a route, a movement beside you caught you off guard and it piqued your interest. Is someone else here?

"hello?" You started, your brows furrowing as you followed the movement.

As far from your expectations, the anonymous person replied and it was a manly, cold voice. "What are you doing up in the middle of the night? Aren't you supposed to be asleep?"

A shiver came across your spine. You shyly said, "aren't you supposed to be too?" You saw his shadow lurch and you took the chance to step forward.

He said, "doesn't matter why I'm here. This is my usual spot." His voice was a bit taunting and bragging.

"Well, you're hiding in the shadows so... And you're not supposed to hide if you claim this as your spot." You sternly said, keeping your gaze fixated on his moving shadow.

"I'm not hiding. Have you come to the realization that it's the dead of the night?" He sternly said.

"Yes, but— I think we should come over to the light so I can see you." You plead but you doubt he would actually do it.

"See me? Pathetic."

You sighed. "What? How about let's do it together? I'm really in the mood for some company right now."

The man was hesitant at first but he considered it. As much as he was irritated by someone invading his territory, he kind of wanted a company too. There was a strong exhale across you as he said. "Fine."

You gave an upturned smile, stepping into a small ray of light seeping through a window. The moonshine cradled your face as well as his. He stood tall and with poise in front of you with a neutral glare, looking down as if his eyes belittle you. "Better princess?"

You couldn't help but stare at his eyes. Wait- he was standing in front of you so he blocked the moonshine and you could only see his silhouette. You grabbed his sleeve and ushered him to a better angle. When you gently pushed his back on a partition, you finally got to look at his golden blue eyes, and the bits of freckles that stretched to his nose and cheekbones. His face was sculpted beautifully and even his nose shaped like a button. He was lithe and pristine. And you began to coil into a pit of fire.

"You're- Draco Malfoy?" Your voice shook.

"that's me." He smirked and it only made my headspace ablaze. "And you are?"

You were too busy admiring his features but your mind eventually rebounded. "I- Y/n- Y/n Y/l/n!"

He kept on smiling. "Oh, you!" He began to finally acknowledge your ghostly presence before. "You're the one I shared potions with on fifth year eh? The one where we got perfect scores?"

"Yeah, that's me."

"Right. The only reason we got perfect grades for it was because of my skills actually. Don't forget that." He playfully said, beaming a wink at you which got your cheeks turning slightly crimson.

"Ha ha, very funny. I still helped though." You avowed.

"Mhm. But I did most of the dirty work and you just stood there, watching." He laughed and I chuckled. Fun times.

"Fine. Have it your way. I did watch instead of help. Happy?" You jeered but you couldn't help but glance at the collection of rings on his bony fingers. You went still for a moment and decided to ask the unthinkable. "Malfoy?"

"Yes?"

"You- you have nice rings. It looks good on you." You faltered in the slightest but remained a tepid look. "Silver matches you to be honest."

"Silver?" His eyebrows rose and his voice was unbelievably sexy. "I get that a lot."

You keep on staring, checking out the patterns designed on the small ringed jewelry such as serpents and cursive letters. You didn't realize you were smiling until his fingers convulsed. "Y/n?"

You look back into his stormy eyes with embarrassment. "Oh I- I'm sorry, I was just-"

"It's obvious you really like them, don't you?"

"Well, I mean it's pretty but-"

"Would you want one?" His question was out of the blue so you nearly jolted.

Your eyes widen in full extent, the feeling of affection was set into extreme levels that you feel like you're about to explode. "Oh er- that's good thank you, but-"

"It's pretty I get it. And you seem to admire it as much as I do so ..." He paused, removing one of the glinting rings from his ring finger and held it into his palm. "Here, you can have it for me."

Your cheeks were flaming and it was intolerable. He was platonic and you never expected it from him. You sucked in a deep inhale, tongue-tied. "Oh my god, Malfoy, this was so unnecessary-"

"It's alright. Besides, I think that hand of yours need some color." He smiled tenderly, handing you the ring. His height was towering and it only made things worse for you to handle because of how the air thickens and the atmosphere suddenly getting hot.

"I d-don't know what to say." You stutter. "But thank you. Thank you so much, wow."

You got ahold of the metallic ring, inserting it on your ring finger but it didn't fit. It was expected of course. So you tried putting it on your middle finger but it was loose still. As you were about to put it on your thumb, his cold hands gripped your wrist making you halt mid-process.

"What is it-"

"Here let me help you out."

God, he was also wearing a silver glinting necklace. Now that is fucking sexy!

Draco unclasped his own necklace, putting either ends of it into the ring until it hang perfectly. When it was perfectly adjusted just how he wanted it to, he offered it to you without double thinking, a genuine grin sprawled on his handsomely face.

You were still deeply honored yet it felt... Wrong. "Draco- I really appreciate this but- it's yours and we barely even talk-"

"I don't care about that." He flawlessly said. "You remind me of someone I deeply love and... I guess this is my way of being grateful we met at this untimely night." He scoffed and you're a bit sure you saw a hint of blush on his face.

"Really?" You didn't bother asking who that person was since he probably wasn't in the mood to tell you. You were flattered by his words as you accepted his offer.

"Yes. Now take this, and wear it. I want to see your hands with my rings, Y/n." He flirtatiously spoke, giving you another wink.

You rolled your eyes at his ridiculous act. As you were about to out it, he stopped you once more and this time you were a bit provoked. "What is it again?"

He shrugged, and now the blush hidden in his handsome features was now displayed. It was cute seeing his pale, porcelain skin yo be tainted with a tinge of scarlet. He took the necklace into his hands and made strong and seducing type of eye contact. You nearly tripped at his look right now as he said. "Let's make this scene a bit... Romantic. And by that..." He clasped the necklace on your neck, his fingers ghosting your skin ever-so-slightly. "I get to do this to you."

You shudder, not just because of the cold weather, but because of his cold touch. It was so nice against your skin that you wanted him to do it again. You smiled and bit your lip to restrain any embarrassing words. "Draco, you're being too sweet-"

"Am I? People always like the idea of making me sound rude. It feels good I get to prove it to you that that is a lie." His hands sat ok your shoulder, the pad of his thumb caressing you pulse point between your neck and shoulder.

"I understand that. When people wanted to make you sound like a villain when truly your just trying to be genuine and basic?"

Draco grinned. "Yeah, Y/n. Something like that."

You contemplated for a moment, the tension between you building up because of how close your lips had been. It was merely an inch apart, your noses almost touching that you suddenly want to feel the saccharine taste of his lips and the soft texture pressed against yours. Maybe it would be the cure to your insomnia-driven nights. Maybe it would ease and alleviate you.

"You're pretty, you know?"

You were taken a back. You stared at his eyes still and didn't even realize his hands had dropped down to your elbows, pulling it closer to him, informing you that he wants your hands to lean on his chest—to feel how ragged his breathing had gotten just by her presence. You flinched a little and smiled.

"Oh?" Was the only word to roll out of your tongue.

"Mhm." Draco was lost in his own void, his concentration had dropped from your eyes and down to your gaped lips. "So pretty..."

Fuck...

You couldn't bear the growing impatience anymore and you knew to yourself that you had to do something about it. Something to help soften his heavy breathing. He looked tired and worn out. Fragile and about to burst. You had to do something about it quick before he breaks.

Shit!

And so you lifted your heel to match his height and pecked a kiss on the corner of his mouth. For a moment Draco closed his eyes to memorize the way both your lips linked—he was awestruck. He smelled good. So good that you wanted to give another go but was frustrated enough that he didn't slam you against the wall and leave you breathless from his aggressive kisses so you just stood there and watched him remember the unsolicited peck you just gave him.

"Y/n-"

"Can I kiss you?" You abruptly said without hesitation. "Again? And this time... Better?"

Shit..

He nodded in the slightest of movement before lowering his head and both your lips met anew. There were fireworks and butterflies erupting in your stomach and all you could feel was how graceful and subtle his tongue shifted against yours and it was pure bliss. And this time, it was rougher than you thought.

a/n: AHHH! i hope you liked this one, and also PART TWO IS COMING SOON! sorry, I left y'all in a cliffhanger ;))

[mc-lukanette]

Marinette tried not to be obvious with her annoyance, but it was difficult when she knew that Lila had come to the Liberty specifically to irritate her. It wasn't even her paranoia creeping up, as Lila had made it clear from their first day of face-to-face interaction that she wanted to make Marinette's life miserable. The worst part was that everyone else either believed her or tolerated her, meaning Marinette looked unreasonable no matter what she did to combat it.

She figured she should've known that Luka would be Lila’s next target. The Liberty had always felt like somewhat of a safe haven - funny, considering who owned it - so it had only been a matter of time until Lila had heard enough to decide to show up there.

"Oh, she seemed so curious to actually be on a houseboat! She's only ever been on yachts and stuff before! How could we say 'no'?

Marinette tried to keep her lips shut tight so the gritting of her teeth wasn't seeable to anyone. The best she could do was watch from afar and keep any unkind comments internal while vaguely fantasizing about being Ladybug and dumping Lila in the garbage where she belonged.

Luka, to his credit, didn't seem to take Lila's bait like everyone else. She'd sought him out and he technically listened to her (as she lied about all the music people she knew and all the connections she could give him), but he was mostly occupied with tuning his guitar, only giving her a vague noise every now and then to signal that he was listening.

It was one of Marinette's few joys of the day, which made it twice as infuriating when Lila ruined it.

"Anyway, Luka," Lila added, her voice saccharine and fake, "I really hope you and I can become great friends."

Luka's eyebrow twitched.

"And don't worry, I would never force you. I know there are some people like that, who want to make everything go their way—"

Marinette knew it was a jab at her even though she definitely wasn't that kind of person; from Lila's point of view though, of course she'd think that.

Lila continued, "but I'd never do that to you, okay? I promise!"

For the first time since she'd been talking to him, Luka turned to her, his expression somewhere between neutral and the annoyance he showed at listening to XY's "version" of Kitty Section's music. "Can you please—"

He didn't get to finish that sentence, as Lila suddenly leaned in to kiss him. Luka jerked away the moment it registered with him, but it was already too late; the contact had been made.

All the anger that had been stewing in Marinette's stomach bubbled to the surface. She stormed over, her body language confrontational as she asked, "What do you think you're doing?!"

The outburst had gotten the attention of the other girls. Though they hadn't seen it, what happened was obvious given the way Luka was covering his mouth.

Lila turned to face Marinette, sinking to that vulnerable state she used so much whenever she got caught. "I-I didn't mean to! I meant to kiss his cheek and he turned too quickly."

It was a lie, and Marinette knew it. Lila had intentionally said things to make Luka look at her so she could kiss him, all to irritate Marinette.

"You see..." Lila pressed her palm to her cheek. "I-I thought a cheek kiss would be okay. You don't seem like the type of person who would be close to someone like him, and everyone told me that you do it all the time."

Marinette was fuming at the implication, feeling personally insulted at the idea that she and Luka weren't close.

And they'd told her. Her friends had been gossiping about her to Lila, or at least telling her details, which Marinette herself had definitely not consented to.

She went to toss a glare her friends' way, but they were already rushing forward to assure Lila that everything was okay, with Marinette having to step away or risk getting knocked back with the way they formed around her.

"M-maybe I need to re-learn French customs. I spent so long away from the country and other places have—"

Marinette wasn't listening anymore. She knew how this went and didn't want to be around to see another repeat of it, nor her friends potentially shouting at her. She turned away with a frustrated exhale, speed-stomping away and going up the stairs to head outside.

Passing by the cabin, she went into the greenhouse-esque area with all of the larger plants, plopping down on the long flower-patterned seating with a heavy sigh. She'd fallen right into Lila's trap, again, and couldn't help being angry at the whole situation.

Going after her was one thing, but Luka? And to kiss him like that on top of trying to lure him in with her deceit? Marinette knew deep down that she had a right to be upset at Lila's actions, but the way she reacted to it just ended up making Lila look like the victim instead of Luka. Had she failed him?

She groaned into her clasped hands, imagining that Luka must've thought that she looked like a fool shouting like that. She liked to think that she would've done things differently had she been able to do it again, but she was still angry and honestly just wanted to go off on Lila again.

She didn't move, though briefly considered going home. After all, it'd be pointless going back downstairs, as she'd probably just end up being glared at and blamed for Lila being upset. Luka probably didn't want to see her either after that display anyway.

As if her concerns had summoned him, she suddenly heard his voice call out to her from nearby. "Marinette?"

She stiffened, then lowered her hands enough to peek at him. When none of the negative emotions she expected showed on his face, she lowered them the rest of the way.

"Are you okay?" he asked gently.

She straightened, jaw slack that's that what he was concerned about. "Am I okay? What about you?!" She gestured wildly to him. "That—that akuma-luring harpy just kissed you!"

She realized what she said and covered her mouth, knowing that it was a much more direct insult than she usually would've gone with. Luka, however, tried to suppress a laugh from it, snorting loudly into his hand.

"I—" He cut himself off, still chuckling too much to speak. After a few seconds, he took a breath to calm down, then gave her a calm smile and continued, "I washed my mouth out, just to make sure."

Marinette tried to keep her negative emotions at the forefront, but then she was trying to suppress her laughter as well. She almost felt bad about it, but the wide grin on Luka's face showed that he'd fully intended for her to have that reaction. He walked over, taking a seat down next to her and leaning forward to maintain eye contact.

He waited until she quieted herself down with a final squeak that he asked again, "Really, are you okay?"

The smile she had on from laughter faded, though her spirits were still much higher than before. "Not really. She—she's always doing that." She glanced at him. "Let me guess, they're catering to her?"

He nodded. "They're planning on having lunch without you since you—" He made a face, clearly displeased. "—'made her so upset.'" He stared out of the glass opposite of them. "I wasn't going to join them."

"You didn't have to do that," she said, though her voice was soft from being touched by the gesture.

He gave her a smile. "I know, but I'd rather have lunch with you than with everyone else and that—" He smirked. "—'harpy.'"

Marinette tried to bite back a smile of her own, but couldn't. Hearing the pure-hearted Luka say an insult so brazenly, even if he was just parroting her own, was too funny not to smile at.

"Thanks~" she said gratefully.

"I should be thanking you," he argued. He leaned back in his seat, but didn't stop looking at her. "For being so upset on my behalf."

She blushed, looking away with both shyness and embarrassment. "I-I was really loud though."

"You play your song for everyone to hear, Marinette. I love that about you."

She blushed deeper, mentally cursing his smoothness. "How are you so okay with this?"

"I'm not," he replied, "not really, but..." He shrugged. "That kiss didn't mean anything to me. It wasn't real."

She looked over at him, frowning. "T-that was your first though, wasn't it?"

His brows rose in surprise, his face telling her everything she needed to know even before he responded. "...Well, yeah."

Now that she'd had it officially confirmed, Marinette bristled. "It's not right!" She huffed and turned to him, throwing her arms out. "Your first kiss is supposed to be special and with someone you really love! It's not supposed to just be stolen from you like that!"

He touched a hand to his chest, clearly touched by her passionate anger. She turned red and forced herself to look away from him, finding it hard to stay angry when he stared at her that way.

"...And I know you were already pretty upset with her, I could see it," she explained, "so it wasn't like I felt like I had to get angry for you, but still. She doesn't care what anyone thinks and I'm mad at her for kissing you like that and I'm mad at me because she only did it to get on my nerves and I know I shouldn't be mad at me because she's just mad that I won't fall for her lies but I'm mad anyway because I still let her rile me up when that's exactly what she wanted." Burying her face in her hands, she whined and added, "I guess I wasn't jealous at least - not in that way anyway - since I'd never want to do anything to you without your permission like she did, but I know she meant for me to get to jealous because I just—"

She cut herself off, the words clogging up her throat and forcing her to swallow them. She raked her fingers through her hair, mentally debating with herself if she really wanted to tell Luka everything.

But of course she did. Not only did he deserve it, but she felt responsible for her feelings and it was her fault that things happened the way they did, even if it was indirect on her part.

"I..." She closed her eyes and sighed, her voice lowering itself to a whisper. Hunching over, she wrung her hands together and admitted quietly, "I wanted to be your first kiss..."

Silence took over the conversation from there, but she understood. She just dropped a bomb on him and couldn't expect him to reply right away, so she let the seconds drag on without any judgment on her part.

Eventually, she heard the sound of Luka sliding himself closer, so close that the side of his hand briefly touched her leg. He inhaled softly like he was about to speak, stopped, then tried again.

"You... you what?"

She steeled herself up, the words only slightly easier to say than before. "I wanted to be your first kiss. I-I'm selfish, and I know that. Everyone knows it, and that's why—"

His hand touched her leg again. She briefly jumped in surprise, then realized moments later that the touch was intentional this time, as he'd fully settled his hand on her leg. Fighting against her nerves, she turned to look at him and saw how relaxed his expression was.

"You can be selfish."

"W-what?"

"It makes me happy. It means that—" He paused, his cheeks tinting pink as he smiled wide. "—you really want me."

It almost sounded like a question the way he said it, his eyes distant only in a way that implied that he's still absorbing what she'd said.

Her chest filled with hope as she squeaked out, "I...I do. Of course I do." Looking down at the hand on her lap, she placed her own onto it and gave it a squeeze. "But..."

The hope twisted and fought with the shame attempting to take its place, memories of the past coming back to haunt her. She averted her gaze fully, staring off at nothing in particular. "I-I can't give you my first kiss." She squeezed his hand tighter, as if that made anything better. "There was this akuma, and I had to... I mean—"

She felt his hand shifting in hers and immediately worried that she'd squeezed it too hard. She loosened her grip, only to feel his hand turn itself around to hold her hand back, pressing their palms together. The motion made her look back and make eye contact with him.

"Then that wasn't real either, was it?" he asked gently. Giving a fond glance down at their joined hands, he added, "This might be more Rose's type of music than mine, but I think the only kisses that have to matter are the ones that you put meaning into playing."

She gaped. It was still registering with her that he was not only okay with her crushing on him, but still returned it. "S-so... it's not any different? You'd let me kiss you anyway?"

"I never thought about first kisses or second kisses, or any verses beyond that," he told her, placing his other hand on top of their joined ones. "I only care about your kisses."

Marinette's cheeks turned crimson, and she nearly burst into happy laughter. She settled for beaming at him, still amazing at how easily he could ease all of her worries and doubts.

"Then... I'll give you all of them."

She shifted, continuing to hold his hand while her other went to his face. He leaned into her touch, making her all the more eager to pull him in. He didn't protest when she did, his hand moving away from their joined ones to grab her shoulder.

They kissed. Marinette was momentarily surprised when Luka's lips seemed to have a hint of wetness to them, only to realize that he'd meant it when he said that he'd washed his mouth out. She giggled mid-kiss, positively delighted to have someone like him, and he responded to the sound with a soft noise of content. She stroked his cheek with her thumb, then slid her hand down to his neck to urge him closer. He did the same with her shoulder, pulling her in and deepening the contact.

It took a few seconds of internal debate for her to convince herself to break the kiss to talk to him, and she enjoyed the slight whine he made as she did so.

"Better than Lila?" she asked, knowing the answer but wanting to hear it regardless.

"Definitely," he replied without hesitation, leaning in to touch his forehead to hers.

She hummed. "Mm, good." She pulled him back in for a smaller, quicker kiss that was no less loving than the last. Full of confidence, she felt it safe to say, "I should always be playing my boyfriend's favorite song."

His reaction was immediate, his eyes sparkling and his smile wide. She blushed red, overwhelmed and half-regretting saying anything. He was just too much.

"What is it?" he asked when she averted her gaze.

"P-please stop smiling like that," she whined.

"I can't," he said. More to himself than her, he added cheerfully, "I'm your boyfriend."

"Luka!"

[jaeminzie]

what do you desire? | n.jm

↳ na jaemin x gender neutral!reader

synopsis: a single tutoring session to help a failing na jaemin earned you a ticket to receive whatever you want. so what will it be?

genre: fluff

word count: 2,082

part of ‘the dreamies in hogwarts’ series

“don’t you feel any sympathy for me?!” jaemin’s voice bounced on the walls, making your ears rings for the nth time for the past ten minutes of him following you around campus. “professor vector will kill me if i fail another arithmancy exam!” his voice seems louder than before indicating that he got closer to your moving body.

you groaned as your legs began to feel like jelly after brisk walking the entire school. halting your steps and turning your body sharply to face the distressed boy, making the ends of your blue hinted robe swing into the air. “well, if only you studied-“

“-and that’s exactly why i need you to help me.” the boy dressed in green took a few steps to get closer to you and reached for your hands (which you gladly pulled away from him) with pleading eyes. “i promise i won’t waste your time, i’ll for sure get a good grade if you help me.” that stupid, beautiful smile of his made a small appearance, making you roll your eyes at his act of flattery.

“and what do i get from it?” you crossed your arms and glared him down which made the boy frown. “as a tutor, i need some form of payment.”

jaemin’s head fell back as he let out a laugh, giving you a perfect view of his exposed neck accessorized with a dainty gold necklace that complimented his beauty so well. “isn’t it obvious?” he looked at you with a raised eyebrow, expecting you to know what the hell he was talking about. he continued to look at you until the silence became unbearably long, he scoffed, “you get to spend time with me, of course!”

your mouth gaped open at his words and the seriousness of his face, “goodbye, jaemin.” dropping your arms to your side, you turned away from his body and began walking at your previous speed only to be pulled back when jaemin grabbed your hand and turned you around by your waist.

he immediately removed his hands off of you when he noticed the flare in your eyes. “okay okay, i was kidding.” scratching his neck, jaemin was thankful it was nighttime since you weren’t able to see his crimson red cheeks nor see the way his eyes glistened as he admired your features underneath the moonlight. “i’ll do whatever you want, i don’t care what it is — literally anything your heart desires. promise.” he lifted his pinky finger up and looked at you seriously.

you pondered at his offer and smirked once you realized that jaemin has a meaty wallet while you had a long shopping list of supplies to check off at dervish and banges. “fine.” jaemin’s smile couldnt be contained at your word, you held up a finger to shush his incoherent noises of excitement. “i cannot be seen with you.”

his smile dropped and placed his hands on his waist, “well, that’s insulting.”

“you expect me to be with you in broad daylight when you have an entire cult of students who would kill one another to receive a one-second glance from you?” you roll your eyes when jaemin begins to smirk, feeling his ego inflating. “we meet after hours at the astronomy tower tomorrow night.”

“y/n, if you want to get with me, just tell me — you don’t need to use our tutor sesh as an exc-“

you scoffed and turned around to walk toward the ravenclaw common room, leaving the boy to talk to himself in the empty corridor.

you shake your head to yourself. why, just why are you doing this.

—

two days later, you sat in study hall fighting your heavy eyelids and limp neck. the first tutor session with jaemin consisted of one sided conversations and flirting since the boy cannot get a hint. though, there were times where he’d impress you with his ability to learn things quickly.

your friend nudged your shoulder and ‘pst’-ed at you. “did you hear about last night?” she spoke quietly, making sure not to disturb the people around you.

you looked at her briefly before closing your eyes to gain some sort of relief from your exhaustion. “don't know, and frankly, i don’t care.”

“well, na jaemin from slytherin house has a significant other.”

you giggled to yourself because there’s no way a boy with such a bad game could score a date when you weren’t even willing to have tutoring with him. “yeah yeah.”

your friend whisper-yelled, “and they’re from our house!” your eyes immediately widened. “right! they were seen walking around past bedtime by gryffindor’s head boy, mark lee, when he was told to make sure there were no students awake.”

you sat up straight, fully awake, shaking your head. “you think anyone is stupid enough to walk around hogwarts at night?”

“a ravenclaw at that.” your friend shrugged. “mark only saw jaemin’s face and the blue details of the other’s robe, he sucks at lying so.”

“bogus.” you huffed.

“what?” she gave you a teasing smile. “jealous? you like him or something?”

you fake laughed at your friend and discreetly began writing a note before gathering your supplies and dismissing yourself. you scanned the room, walking your way to the man of the hour and slipped the note on the table he sat alone at. you wasted no time dashing out the hall, making sure you didn’t look suspicious since jaemin had eyes on him every second and you seriously did not feel like being mauled right now.

jaemin watched your body disappear through the doors and frowned at how you didn’t bother to speak a single word to him before leaving. he fiddled with the small piece of paper before opening it up, smiling as he read the words.

astronomy tower, same time. don’t be late.

—

jaemin’s body turned around in an instant when he heard the wooden floor of the tower creaking, already showcasing his smirk. “what do we have here?” he questioned your late arrival when you were so persistent on being on time yourself.

you couldn’t respond as you were trying to catch your breath after enduring the dreadful flight of stairs.

jaemin smiled endearingly at your state, walking up to you slowly, “i’ll let it slide because you’re too cute.” he ended his sentence with a small boop on your nose, still keeping his smile on his face. “what's the occasion, we didn’t plan to study? you couldn’t get enough of me, huh.”

finally maintaining a stable breathing pattern, “you wish.”

jaemin chuckled and wiped his nose with his thumb, “you’re right, i do wish that.” the octave of his voice dropped even lower, making your knees weak and your act harder to play. “i’m guessing you heard the rumors.”

you snapped your head up to look at him. “you knew?” he responded silently with a nod. “aren't you friends with that mark guy?” another nod. “if people find out it’s me, i’ll be dead.”

“when people find out it’s you.” he corrected you.

you let out a breathy laugh and he stood so closely to you that the air hit his face, making the front strands of his hair swing back. “you’re funny.”

his smirk dropped and was replaced with a small smile. “i got an ‘a’ on my exam, by the way.”

your mood shifted at his words, the smile on your face was so bright that jaemin believed the moonlight couldn’t even compete against you. when you realize you’ve been smiling for an abnormal amount of time, you cleared your throat and brushed his shoulder with yours as you walked past him toward the metal railings. “good job.” you rested your elbows on the metal and took in the fresh air and the beautiful view from the tower.

jaemin’s footsteps were slow as he made his way behind you, he stood directly behind you with his hands in his pockets. “thanks to you.” he breathed against your hair, making your heart race. “so, what does your heart desire, y/n?”

you. you thought to yourself.

his hands reached over to lean them against the railing, making his chest press against your back. “i can turn down the rumors if that’s what you really want.”

you tried to stabilize your breathing, you wanted nothing more than to crumble into the floor as you felt your face and neck become warmer. “no.” you spat out, wincing silently at yourself for the impulsive decision. clearing your throat, “it’s fine.”

you couldn’t see but jaemin was smiling as he felt your ragged breathing against his chest, and saw how your fingers nervously fiddled with the railing in front of your bodies. wanting to have more fun and test your buttons, he questioned, “why is that?” he lowered his head so his chin was resting on your shoulder, he could feel the heat of your cheeks radiate and you felt the heat from the tip of his ears touch your bare neck.

“just cause. to save you from trouble.” you mumbled.

“and what about my cult?”

“i don’t care anymore.”

“so you don’t care if i-“ he placed a delicate kiss on the side of your neck. “-in front of them?”

your breath audibly hitched at his actions, and you swore he could feel your heart pounding through your back. you could only hummed at him.

he removed his hands off of the railing and wrapped his arms around your waist, securing his hold on you. “i knew it.” he spoke softly right into your ear.

caressing your body, he moved his hands on your sides and maneuvered your body to face him and placed your back against the rusty metal. “i like you too.”

you laughed at the dreamy eyes he’s giving you and the overflowing confidence in his tone of voice. “you sound so sure of yourself.”

he quirked an eyebrow. “are you saying that i’m wrong?”

you purse your lips at him and chose not to answer his question to tease him.

jaemin’s face moved closer to yours, nose brushing against each other and lips gazing one another. “that’s what i thought.” his lips brushed yours as he spoke, and you could feel the butterflies unleash out of their cocoons and soar through your entire body.

you were prepared to let out a snarky remark but you lost your train of thought once you felt his plump lips engulf your soft ones. jaemin’s grip on your hips tightened as he pulled you closer to him while your hands moved up his torso, chest, and landed underneath his jaw. the movements of your lips never ceased as both of you finally grew tired of hiding your feelings toward each other — well mainly your feelings, jaemin wasn’t the most discreet with his.

the sounds of your lips and heavy breathing filled the tower. jaemin pulled away just to kiss the skin around your lips and down your neck, his hands slithered around and found a place on your lower back. you sighed contently at the sensation of his wet lips against the cold skin of your neck.

his kissing gradually came to a stop, he looked up at you with a tired smile and shining eyes. you both admired the view in front of each other before the tinted red boy pulled you into a hug, hand in your hair while yours caressed his broad back.

“i thought of my wish.” you pulled back from the hug to look him in the eye but kept your arms secure around his waist, jaemin copied your moves.

jaemin looked around, pretending to think. “hmm, what could it be?”

you pinched his side slightly, making his addictive giggle erupt out of him. “my heart desires a date.”

jaemin’s smile grew. “no way, me too. how convenient is that!”

you rolled your eyes at his antics, biting a smile.

“and also for you to protect me from your little cult.” jaemin laughed at your words but both of you knew you were being serious.

he nodded and hummed. “whatever your heart desires, i shall grant it.”

you cringed at his language. “gross, don’t do that.” slapping a hand against his chest while laughing. jaemin brought up his left hand to hold yours placed on his chest, grabbing it, caressing it with his thumb, and bringing it up to his lips to gently place a lingering kiss right on the back of your hand.

“whatever your heart desires.”