I feel this question sounds mean, but I'm not good with words so I don't know how to make it sound nicer. I saw a post you made the other day about experiences you've had as otherkin, and they included things like your phantom limbs having some kind of influence in your surroundings (like a friend being able to see them). Wouldn't that be delusional? How is it different from people who claim to be able to transform physically?
Because a delusion is something that can only be perceived by the person experiencing it, primarily.
I move my supernumerary phantom limbs, someone else reacts to them. What exactly is the supposed delusion in this scenario? The phantom limbs are categorically not a delusion. The other person is responding to a stimulus someone else can also perceive, so that's not a delusion.
It's weird, and I don't have a good explanation for it, but the simple fact that it was someone else "seeing" them unprompted (practicing aura sensing, if you want to get more specific, and "seeing" them in my aura/astral body) and was shared between multiple people in as objective a way as you can get with a nonphysical thing (ie, my physical body very carefully held still and yet me moving my wings back and forth and him being able to track them back and forth, and me being able to watch him track them back and forth, indicating that we were both getting the same stimulus at the same time) makes it not a delusion. And, hell, there are other explanations - maybe I was moving just slightly without realizing, and he was subconsciously taking cues from that, for instance - but the event itself is verifiable by multiple people even if the exact explanation is up for debate.
The automatic doors thing is significantly weirder, and it's not like I've done rigorous testing of it so it's possible it's a coincidence, but again, there's a physical thing that is happening that other people can observe. That's not a delusion. Again: I move my supernumerary phantom limb, an observable physical thing happens (whether or not the two are actually linked by causality). What exactly is the delusion in this scenario? The explanation is up for debate, but the physical event itself is verifiable by other people. (As opposed to p-shifting, which, any p-shifter will do a whole song and dance to avoid giving you any actual evidence of their supposed shapeshifting, because they know it's not actually verifiable. Or when they do, it's something that's definitely not what they're claiming it to be.)
This is not my finest explanation of things because I'm struggling to put this into words, but hopefully it's satisfactory.
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warlock wizard Wally scribbles... Thinkings! oh and a bonus bard-ish Barnabys in the corner for flavor
outfit ramblings:
first of all that is a Terrible rendition of what Home looks like in my head. i just needed to fill empty space </3
the staff was the toughest part honestly. bc it Had to be paintbrush-themed, but then halfway through scribbling i was like "oh shit. there are only so many ways to draw a paintbrush-wizard-staff and Weevmo already hit it out of the park." so if you're seeing similarities! you're right! i tried to make it as different as i could! there is Inspiration from their marvelous design, however accidental or subconscious! Apologies!
he gets a pointed hood instead of a hat because a) it looks great on him! and b) it has less of a chance of messing up his hair! also c) it helps muddle the difference between Wizard and Warlock. typically hoods have evil/duplicitous connotation - blur the lines! i want his long gloves and forearm wraps to have the same vibe. his neckerchief is a big help in hiding Home's seal!
his layered (loosely apple-themed) capelet (which the hood is attached to) has a nice high collar & hides the details of his loose shirt - eye embroidery! and some flowers on the shoulders but yk, mostly eyes. on one side of the shirt buttons has open eyes, the other side they're closed! there's also one big eye on his back!
his belt buckle is two halves of an apple! he wears tall thigh-high boots w/ low heels to feel Taller! he has a book-holster hooked to the back of his belt, which holds his grimoire! and he has a lil thigh-bag that has been magicked to be Bottomless and warps size! he can fit pretty much anything in there! canvases! paint! apples!
his half-skirt thing (idk what the word for it is!) is really plush, like a quilt - his capelet is the same fabric. soft, cozy. sometimes he'll use the skirt thing as a blanket in a pinch, or as a picnic placemat!
is his outfit a little Complicated? is it annoying to replicate? yes and yes. but im a maximalist at heart and Nothing But The Best for the blorbo <3 layers my beloved <3
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☆ love; heretical and divine
{☆} characters tsaritsa
{☆} notes cult au, yandere, drabble, gender neutral reader
{☆} warnings blood
{☆} word count 0.8k
To love a God is heretical. It is an act of blasphemy– it is to drag them down from their throne of hollow gold, to topple the pedestal the worshipers uphold on their shoulders like lambs at the herders heel. It is the act of forcing them to their knees and ripping that beating heart of glorious gold and beautiful, cruel divinity from their chest, so pure it burns.
To love a God is to make them sin. To make them painfully, horribly human.
To love a God is to sin.
The love of a worshiper is no love at all, brilliant in its raw purity, untainted by sin. It is fear and obedience masked by adoration so overpowering it corrupts. It makes the lamb so unquestioning in it's faith it will never question the knife that cuts, the teeth that rip, the claws that tear. If the Creator deemed them unworthy of the very life crafted by their hands, then they must have committed a sin so grave there lay no salvation for their horrid soul.
But she is no worshiper– her lips speak of heresy as easily as she breathes, her words nothing but lies, cold and cruel like the ice that crawls along her skin like webs.
She loves a God like a lover should.
A damned sinner reaching longingly for the heavens.
She loves a God in the subtle brush of their lips, their muffled voices behind closed doors as they indulge in curiosity untamed. She is a sinner through and through, but she feels herself fall further with every brush of her hand across their cheeks, every touch she bestows upon them like a lover. She memorizes the imperfections of their body like memorizing a map– every scar, every mark, every line drawn on their body like a canvas, her touch the brush that stains the pristine white.
No devoted lamb shall ever see the painting they create in these stolen moments– it is for the eyes of a heretic so vile it makes them shudder, their body dirtied by the love of a woman so vile even their divinity is obscured by the ice.
The lambs may be satisfied with fleeting glimpses of gold and empty words from lips that guide them to the jaws of the wolves, but she is not. Her hands crave them like a starving hound, aching to touch that imperfect skin hidden by the veil of gold that obscures the painfully human body beneath. She longs to free them from the golden cage that binds them– to see their wings blot out the sky, their divinity tainted by sin and making them all the more beautiful for it.
It is a longing that leaves a festering wound that cannot heal, will not heal. Even if it could, she would not let it.
For as much as she tries, deny it as she may, she is no better then the blind lambs following the herder who holds a blade in their hand, glittering like gold in the sun, stained by dull red.
She is a fool, and what a fool they make of her with the touch of their hands against her skin– so cold it leaves frost on their fingertips. Yet they do not fear the cold, mapping out every inch of her imperfections, carved into her body by her own hands.
She has always been a heretic, cursing the divine until she could speak no more, but if divinity can be found in them – in this love that consumes, that burns her hands and her lips – then she is a Saint, praying at the altar until her throat bled.
But in the end, she has and will always be a cold woman with hands stained with blood. Until it is all she can taste, until it is all she can smell, until it is all she can feel. These hands of hers, heretical and divine, will bleed the God from their veins– she will become the wolf to their lamb until the rivers of Teyvat run gold with their ichor, until the gold bleeds into red, the taste of their divinity on her tongue.
Until she drags a God from their lofty throne and makes of them a monster.
There is no greater triumph to the heretic then to love a God into sin. To make a God sin to love.
To love is to be human, and they are no God.
Even if she must tear the gold from their very being until all that's left is something human. Even if Teyvat crumbles and decays, even if it begins over and over again..
She will do it again and again, until the gold can bleed no longer. Until her sins grow too great for Teyvat to contain.
To love a God is to devour, and be devoured. An endless cycle of sin that dulls the glow of gold into something new– something horrifying and divine, in it's own right. Something just as horrid as her, just as divinely corrupted by the sins she carries on her shoulders like a trophy, as gold as the sun and as cold as ice.
Divinity, carved into something human by love all consuming, until it all bleeds away and they begin their dance anew, for as many cycles as it takes.
An eternity, if she must, of dooming this world of theirs to fire and decay for a glimpse of the being snared by their golden shackles.
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i have warmed up to both toshiro and kabru a lot lately ngl. i rlly like both of them. and as much as i'm looking forward to next week i'm kinda scared of the toshiro hate it's gonna bring outta the woodwork. partly bc i hated him at first myself lol 💀 his fight with laios reminded me of a lot of painful experiences i've had in regards to being autistic but like......... i think once i saw past my own bad experiences and perceived the situation objectively, toshiro's explosion was pretty understandable given the circumstances. toshiro was on the verge of starvation, dehydrated, barely able to keep himself conscious and standing up, and then the random white guy who's kinda been committing unintentional microaggressions towards him for years casually mentions that he did dark magic on the woman toshiro is in love with, the same woman that he's been driving himself to death's door to search for. i think he's justified in being a little upset lol.
like yeah i think what he said to laios was shitty, and ultimately i would say he is "in the wrong" in their conflict, but it's not like laios is a perfect angel either. and toshiro is also just in a desperate miserable situation, and stress can make ppl say things they don't always mean. and in the end, their conflict just makes the bond between them stronger bc it enables toshiro to open up and be more honest and encourages laios to consider his feelings more. and laios still adores the guy and wants to go travelling with him at the end of the manga
i think sometimes ppl should just allow characters to be flawed and say shitty things without instantly declaring those characters as villains. and i don't think his love for falin is "manic pixie girl-ifying" her either, he literally fell in love with her bc he thought she was kind and gentle and intelligent and unique which i think is sweet! and in time i think he would come to see those traits in laios as well.
i'm not saying ppl have to like him bc i didn't even like him myself at first (i actually straight up HATED him initially) but PLEASE at least allow the situation to be nuanced
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