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norcumii · 3 years ago

Note

for the ask meme: Rex/Obi or pairing/characters of choice - Werewolf/vampire AU / Sick/injured / Stranded Due to Inclement Weather / Huddling for warmth

For this trope mashup meme.

This was CLEARLY influenced by seananmcguire's Newsflesh series, which was the last zombie related media I interacted with, and I regret NOTHING.

(Meanwhile, much worldbuilding was done by Dogmatix, who I was foolish enough to let near the plunnies again ^_^)

*****

The problem with zombies, Obi-Wan couldn’t help but muse, was that they stopped thinking. Oh, there was some low-level intelligence left in there, but it was mostly focused on consuming the living. Not tactics, for the most part, not unless the bastards were very fresh or in large enough groups, but that also meant that when some brilliant asshole declared “oh, the zombies wouldn’t/couldn’t ever do that,” no one consulted the zombies.

Thus, an early morning patrol in an area that “never saw more than one or two zombies” turned into a clusterfuck retreat. Though ‘patrol’ was rather a gross overstatement for just the two of them taking an idle walk because some days, Rex was too jittery for sleep and too damn self-sacrificing to admit that he missed early morning runs.

There was always enough fog coming in from the river that they should have been fine.

There also shouldn’t have been an entire pack of at least a dozen, dozen and a half zombies in the area. Where the fuckers had even come from was an unpleasant mystery.

“Rex?” Obi-Wan murmured into the man’s ear. “Are you with me?” he asked as if he couldn’t make out the glacially slow beat of his heart.

Rex groaned, head lolling to nestle further in the crook of Obi-Wan’s neck. He mumbled something that was probably a curse, which left Obi-Wan in the unenviable position of having to close his eyes and take his own steadying breath. Yes, on the one hand he did have an unfairly attractive boyfriend draped across his lap, straddling his hips and feeling like he was several seconds away from some serious necking.

On the other, they were also treed a good thirty feet above a pack of damned zombies, which had already tried seriously munching on Rex, and ‘necking’ could have serious consequences when one of them was an actual vampire.

Speaking of. Obi-Wan shifted in the cautious little jig in an attempt to nudge Rex more to the left. If he could just free up his arm enough, then he could move around while not tossing them off the tree stand or dislodging the thick emergency poncho that was the only thing keeping Rex from turning into a charred crisp. It was not sized for two, but there hadn’t been time to be more careful and drape it over just Rex instead of just plonking it down over the two of them.

“If you refuse to leave base again without your entire damned armor because of this, I’m going to be very put out,” Obi-Wan informed him, getting another incoherent unhappy noise. The armor was good at keeping the soldiers bite free – not that they needed to worry about the zombification business, but it still hurt them and fed the damn undead. It was also effective at keeping the soldiers touch starved and isolated in ways Obi-Wan had difficulty standing.

Another careful shift, and he could just barely dig out one of the small, squishy packs he kept in his jacket for emergencies.

Since his luck was shit, as soon as he pulled it free, the bastard caught on a loose thread, and with his claws he didn’t dare grab too hard for it, and down it tumbled. One of the zombies lunged, snapping at it, and blood exploded all across the remains of the bastard’s face.

Not being too intelligent, the rest of the pack turned on it immediately. Obi-Wan tried to tune out the disgusting carnage, being much more careful on his second attempt. He didn’t have many packets to spare. This one, he managed to juggle up in front of Rex’s face, jostling it a little. “Here. Drink,” he ordered, hoping that would be sufficient. He hated trying to insert the little sippy straws – Anakin had loved juice pouches back as a child, and they’d had similar fiendish straws. Anakin had learned how to insert the little bastards without a problem, but he always asked Obi-Wan to do it for him – because Obi-Wan had never quite managed to master the process, and Anakin was a damned brat.

Bad enough when it was juice.

One way or another, Rex was conscious enough to shift and bite down on the plastic packet. It was always a wonder to watch the soldiers’ regenerative powers at work. As the level of mostly artificial plasma lowered, color drained back into Rex’s face, the nasty burns along truly unfair cheekbones fading as muscle and skin reknit. He could smell the distressing blood-and-raw-meat stench fading, and only then did he start to relax.

When things had started to go to hell around the globe, the powers that be had huddled together around their failing infrastructure and went looking for fantastical solutions to unnatural problems. Obi-Wan could only imagine the levels of exhaustion and terror that had led someone to the conclusion that vampires might be immune to the infections that spread the zombie virus. The sheer potential of that going horribly wrong was at least one movie franchise long, if not several, yet somehow they’d dedicated enough science to make artificial vampires. Oh, technically it wasn’t vampirism, but ‘drank blood, super fast and strong, sunburn to death within minutes, resting vitals dropping down far enough to pass as dead’ was close enough for everyone but petty bureaucrats and pedantic assholes.

Even at the time, Obi-Wan had cynically noted how that meant both a short leash, and a strong vested interest in keeping as many people from going zombie as possible. He’d also noted the infuriating demographics of those who were selected for and survived the process of becoming vampires.

He tried not to think on that much nowadays, because the heightened blood pressure and carnage bothered Rex.

The packet slurped dry in a way that always raised Obi-Wan’s hackles, then Rex blinked up at him a few times in confusion. “You’re fuzzy,” Rex accused.

“That’s called a beard, dear,” Obi-Wan drawled in his most obnoxious tone, pretending he didn’t also have fur sprouting most places, nor the partial muzzle of a transformation enough to give him speed and jumping ability enough to get to one of the safe perches they’d set up weeks ago.

The Powers That Be might have created vampires, but they had also somehow missed the small but stubborn population of entirely naturally occurring werewolves (and affiliated were-creatures) around the world. Some, like Obi-Wan and his pack, were doing their damndest to both keep a low profile and help the poor bastards trying to protect the last of humanity.

Some, like Obi-Wan, might have become unwisely open to certain non-lycanthropes due to unfortunate feelings – not that Obi-Wan was ever about to complain about that.

Either his sarcastic tone or the guttural noises of thwarted zombies sank in, because Rex stiffened and glared down. “Fuck!” he hissed, thighs clenching in a way that Obi-Wan both very much did and very much did not appreciate. His eyes damn well crossed at the wiggle that followed – he could only guess that Rex was going for a weapon that he didn’t have.

“Stop that!” he snarled, letting the wolf out a little more. He needed the muscle and mass to keep Rex in place, longer paws digging into the tree trunk for a slightly more secure hold that was notgroping his idiot boyfriend.

His idiot boyfriend leveled a flat, unimpressed look at him. “Really?” Rex grumped. His eyes flicked down, then back up. “Right now?”

“So sorry, but some of us don’t need to ingest extra blood to get it up, and under less fraught circumstances this might be my idea of a good time.” He tried for a drawl, but it was much more strained than he meant. Oh well, it wasn’t like Rex didn’t know he could be ridiculous. And it really wasn’t intentional.

“Less fraught meaning less zombies?”

“And less daylight.” Obi-Wan didn’t mean for his tone to turn sharp, either, but it did even as he very carefully wrapped his arms tighter around Rex. He made certain not to disturb the poncho, but he, at least, wanted the reassurance. He still wasn’t over the terror of having to go mostly wolf to grab Rex from the pack he was trying to slow down, nor the horror of slinging him over a shoulder to go pelting through the trees. Madcap desperation to find a tree stand before a foggy dawn was not his idea of fun. “Your life is worth a hell of a lot more than an inconvenient hard on.”

Rex huffed a laugh, leaning in to rest his cheek against Obi-Wan’s. “Stop being charming.”

“I’m afraid that’s going to happen approximately never. So sorry.”

For a moment, it was just them – two idiots cuddled together, healthy and alive on a genuinely beautiful, bright Spring morning.

Then a terrible gurgling noise broke the moment, and Rex glanced down at the pack still mingling around the tree, groaning their displeasure at not remembering how to climb. “Was that a zombie?” he asked, as if he damn well didn’t know the truth.

“Shapeshifting burns calories,” Obi-Wan reminded him primly. “As does marathon sprints lugging around idiots like potato sacks.”

“That explains the bruises on my stomach,” he muttered, shifting about to rummage in one of Obi-Wan’s pockets. “Jerky?”

“Please.” All in all, now that matters were calmer, Obi-Wan almost hoped that a rescue would take its sweet time. This was almost nice – all things considered.

~end

#meme #trope mashup #My writing #star wars #Rex/Obi #vampire #werewolf #zombie #i now can't stop seeing this puppy!Anakin addicted to capri sun #i might have been that jerk in the cafeteria who could get into those 9 times out of 10 without incident #I had useful skills back in the day #still taking prompts if folks are curious

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universitypenguin · 3 years ago

Note

What happened to u? U okay?

Hello!

First off, thank you for your concern. I appreciate it and I needed it after the past two days. To answer your question - I'm doing great.

I don’t have a lot of context about your question, but I’m guessing your concern is due to my recent blocking spree. A day ago, I went through my followers list and found some minors. I’ve previously seen smut fanfic writers concerned by underage people interacting with their posts. Until I had to block a few of them, I wasn’t aware how uncomfortable it would make me feel.

Since the blocking spree, I've had a lot of thoughts. I'm about to spew them everywhere. You might regret asking me if I was okay. Sorry about that. No one needs to read this whole manifesto about my rollercoaster of emotions the past few days. But in the interest of transparency, I'm posting this very long note.

What I want my readers to know is the following:

Tumblr is both a place for fanfiction and a social media site.

When I interact with followers and write explicit content, I have to be careful about what I'm saying and who I'm saying it to.

I don't intend to block or purge my followers in the future.

As long as I appropriately tag and put warnings on my work, that is adequate protection for my blog. Everything I write containing explicit content is tagged.

However, I won't interact with users who don't have an age stated in their bio.

There have to be boundaries, given the content of my writing. But I've also come around to the realization that I'm not capable of policing every interaction. Tumblr is a public forum. Minors following me makes me uncomfortable. But by the same token, my work is clearly labeled at 18+ and so is my blog.

There's a lot of explicit content out there for minors if you really think about it. In my high school freshman English class we talked about the book "The Color Purple." Believe me, that was explicit and we were only 14. Any minor with a library card and a Google browser can access a lot more intense content than what I write. I hope they're all being safe, but I can't have a melt down blocking spree again.

I'm not a cop, I'm not a parent, and what minors consume is down to them and the adult responsible for them. If I know someone is a minor I'll block them, should I notice they're trying to interact with me. Otherwise, I'm not purging my followers ever again. It's too much drama. I'd rather leave Tumblr than do that twice. I'm tired and I'm starting to work on my post graduate classes, I work full time in a demanding job, I'm in the process of editing my novel, and trying to keep up with my personal life. Quite literally, I don't have time to block. Writing fanfic is supposed to be my fun time. Let's keep it that way.

Due to the fact that some people I blocked were later unblocked after I took a closer look at their blogs, I'm posting a full explanation below. A quick summary is this:

After only writing for three months, I'd amassed 500 followers. On Monday I blocked almost 200 of them. Then I reviewed my block list and editing down some people who were prematurely blocked. [I assume the anon is one of the unblocked who had me disappear from their dash. Sorry!] This blocking thing isn't sustainable. In the future I'll run my blog differently as far as interaction goes in an effort to be responsible.

Continue reading for the saga of:

The Great Blocking Spree and Existential Crisis of an Erotic Fanfic Writer.

The Blocking Spree:

On Monday I realized a thirteen year old was following me and interacting with my work. This creeped me out.

*Commence blocking spree*

Then I realized how daunting my followers list was. I had 500 followers prior to Monday. That day I blocked about 200 people (some of them prematurely - more on that later.) So after the daunting task of trying to assume, to check bios for ages, to review blog content and determine the user's age, I was tired. Today, I even took a moment to reconsider if I wanted to use Tumblr. Because if all this is my responsibility, maybe I don't have the time or dedication to manage it. When I can be chill, I try to be. This attitude also affected by blocking. It contributed to me unblocking people. When I was doing the blocking spree, I'd give people with no age in their bio a fair shot by reviewing their posts.

I blocked some bot accounts, then a bunch of blank blogs, some ambiguous people who very well could be of age. For the first 100 followers I was pretty aggressive. Then my attention span dropped off and I was a bit more ambivalent. I realized I was doing a crappy job of moderating and wondered what the point was.

The point was that the thirteen year old interacting with my work freaked me out. When I found two sixteen year old followers, it pushed me to continue the purge.

So on I go, blocking. I'm so responsible for doing this, right? But my methodology is crap. What is context for being an adult? Someone had posted about budgeting advice. I thought the budgeting advice was too good for it not to have come from an adult. But my father's a financial advisor and to be honest, I could have given that level of advice at fifteen just from osmosis. Someone had pictures of themselves entering their marijuana plants in the Oregon State Fair. Okay, you've got to be over 18. I didn't block them. Someone else complained about their stats professor and I didn't block them. But in retrospect, one of my high school friends got permission to take college level math courses when we were seniors. She was seventeen when she had a stats professor. The thought circles back - what am I accomplishing here? Next, I went back and unblocked someone who ranted about her Tinder matches being 60 year old men. I wondered if their post was even real. I've lied on the internet before. Nonetheless, I persisted and worked through all 500 followers. When I was done I had 312 followers left.

Post Blocking Spree Existential Crisis:

I know that all the blocking in the world can't stop a teenager who wants to read smut fanfic. I'm not much for posting on social media and I'm not used to a lot of anonymous interaction online. Honestly, I got rid of my SM accounts during college when I felt it was wasting my time. This is the first time I've really use a social media site to post content since college. My twitter account is unused, my Instagram is for close personal friends only, and my TikTok is for mindless consumption of cat videos. (I've trained the algorithm to feed me only cat videos, it's great and I highly recommend it.) I don't post on TikTok, so I don't consider it full use, just lurking.

Okay, Alice, get back to the point....

Right, being anonymous on social media. My blocks are a fence and it's based on self identification from the blogs that follow me. I have little faith in underage consumers to out themselves. I have even less faith in their honesty or respect for an adult's boundaries. They're at a stage in life where they want to push the boundaries. Telling them no is all but inviting them in. I did my blocking spree because I was worried about backlash from someone's parents. But what reasonable judge would come after a fanfic writer? Come on. Logical thoughts but me emotional distress was still brewing.

Why I am the one responsible for who clicks the follow button on my blog? I've always clearly identified what I write and tagged my work as smut.

That thought snapped me out of my whirlwind of anxious thoughts. So I started looking into the laws. My regular work involves medicine, not the legal profession, so I was lost. I found some state level laws that made me glad I'd gone on a blocking spree. California and Florida have specific language in their laws about 'providing minors with explicit content.' But what exactly is that? What I researched applied to the following activities: co-writing smut fanfic with other people, sexting, roleplaying and online messaging.

I run a fanfic blog with limited interaction. I've never done an ask. I don't roleplay on here and I don't want to.

The blocks weren't personal. They were partly based on the awareness that Tumblr is an interactive site and a place that's had a problem with child pornography in the past. But I'm not the smut police. I suck at blocking, and I doubt I did a good job of purging my followers list. This is when it hit me that boundaries are only what I can enforce. They've never been about how other people relate to me, only how I relate to them. (Wow. I've never sounded more like my mother in my life...) After this thought, I started considering what actions I ought to take if I wanted to keep posting fanfic on Tumblr.

My Post Blocking Spree Clarity...

It's up to me who I interact with. I don't have to reply to every comment and re-blog, but I'd like to. I'm stuck between wanting to write for everyone and handling interactions on a social media site that's mostly anonymous.

The fact remains: I can't be the smut police because I suck at it.

What I've decided is that I'll make it very clear on my blog that this is an 18+ space where I publish erotic fanfiction. Smut will always be appropriately marked. I'm not going to interact with reviews, re-blogs, and messages from accounts who don't have their age in their profile. I won't include them in my tag list either. The internet is a public forum. Just as with publishing erotica, once it's out there online for download, it's done. As a ghost writer and an author, I don't control who buys my original fiction, which is just as spicy as my fanfiction. (Trust me, it's explicit. I once had a romance editor tell me I should dial it back on the smutty parts of a novel because "it's a lot of sex for a non-erotica market.") The key difference on Tumblr is about interaction. And that's something I can control. I can decide when I reply to other users. What brought me around to this was the realization that even after the blocking spree, I can't review every single like I get. That's an amount of time and mental energy that's beyond me. Just the past two days have been exhausting and sapped my will to write. Which sucks because I need to go write the next chapter of "Restitution" before tomorrow.

I think the reasons I went on the blocking spree are nuanced. The thirteen year old freaked me out. So did the other underaged people who had ages in their bios. But it also relates to my work. In my job I've seen some nasty child abuse cases. Early on in my career, when I was a 23 year old new hire, I was working on an autopsy for a child abuse victim who'd been murdered by their parent. It was so terrible and graphic, I had to ask one of my older colleagues to take the case. This colleague didn't like me. But she took one look at my face and took the file. She closed out the review without a question and never brought it up again to anyone. I was very grateful. Where I used to work (and where this incident took place) was a major city that holds the unfortunate title of being the human trafficking capital of the US. And something I learned working there was that most human trafficking victims go with their captors willingly. In two years at that job, I never saw one who'd been kidnapped from a dark alley like you see on TV. They were all groomed on social media and thought they were escaping their families (who were often overbearing, toxic, or dysfunctional) for a get away with friends. It was a fun adventure with their internet buddies, until it wasn't.

In retrospect, the underage interaction I found on my blog made me react because of what I've been through. The autopsy case kept coming back to me today while I was at work and I've finally untangled my emotions enough to figure out what caused my melt down. When I was blocking, I was feeling an anxious motivation that I know can only stem from the stress I deal with at my job. Don't feel sorry for me about this - I know my work in medicine helps a lot of people and it's a tremendously satisfying career.

Our Saga's Resolution & How I'm Going to Deal With This In The Future...

- - - - -

In post block clarity, I offer this conclusion:

I'm writing on a public forum. My work is appropriately tagged as smut. In the future, I will also use the tag #no minors to help with filtering. I've always asked underage people not to interact. And on a public forum, what more can I reasonably do? Going forward I will only interact with those who have their age posted in their bio. But blocking sprees and policing every interaction isn't feasible.

I'll review how I'm going to run my tag lists as well. I need to think it over and let my followers know my decision as to if I'll continue using them. Because tagging is definitely interaction and my current tag list was not screened at all. *face palm*

Finally, to my readers who have blank blogs or don't have an age listed. I respect your right to privacy and I'm careful with my personal information as well. But I've also had an uncomfortable two days. If you've lasted through this venting session until now, you must understand that I'm upset by underage interaction. I'm setting my own boundaries and going forward, I'll own my side of the internet. No interaction from me, unless I know your age. Full stop - no exceptions. I think it is reasonable for me to suggest that you leave something on your blog that signifies you are not a minor, whatever that may be. Someone who I didn't block that stands out in my memory had a bio that said "90s baby." It was simple, direct, and left no doubt they were over 18. No age reveal and not even a name. If you put something like this on your blog it'll help explicit content creators feel more comfortable about their interactions.

I went on a spree this Monday and I admit to being heavy handed and aggressive about pruning followers. I had an emotional reaction due to work stress and I didn't think things through logically. I'm relieved for the chance explain myself and set new boundaries that I'm capable of sticking to in the future. But remember - the block button is on my side of the screen. At the end of the day, you might be unhappy with me for the block, but it's my button, it's my blog, and I'll use it as I see fit.

Thank you for reading.

#tw vent #tw child abuse #tw trauma #tw violence #tw human trafficking #penguin blog update #new rules #i'm sorry #its been a long week #I almost left tumblr over this #blocking spree #clarity #smut #no minors #smut fanfiction #smut writing #smut blog #I talk about my work trauma from medicine #boundaries

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yoongi-sugaglider · 4 years ago

Text

Forget Me Nots

A wealthy young man falls overboard while vacationing with friends only to find himself with amnesia and a pretty young wife who seems determined to remind him what hard work and dedication really mean.

Warnings: Strong language, angry Min Yoongi inaccurately portrayed based upon the writer’s imagination,angst, eventual super fluff.

Pairing: Eventual Min Yoongi x reader

Word count: 2911

A/n: So this one came out a bit longer than normal hehe. But like, it’s time yall. To wrap this bad boy up and say goodnight to this series. The next chapter with be the epilogue!~ It’s been a real pleasure writing even thoguh I had some very serious writer’s block going in. But it’s just gotten so much love and that alone made me want to come back and write it. Y/n and Yoongi have had quite the journey yeah? Anyway! Hope yall enjoy!

<<Chapter Nine---Epilogue>>

She glanced up, eyes widening at the zombie like figure that stumbled from the employee exit of Rose’s restaurant. She’d set out from home at the end of his shift, knowing he wouldn’t want to take public transit to get home but fully not expecting the sight that shuffled towards her now. His once navy work shirt was now stained and darkened from all manner of food stuff and his once minty fluff of hair was plastered half haphazardly to his forehead.

Shaking herself out of her stupor she moved to get out of the car but stopped when Yoongi yanked open the passenger door with the last of his strength and toppled into the seat with all the grace of a limp mannequin.

“Sh...are….are you okay?” She stared down at the soggy pile of rags, startling when a single eye stared up at her through his sweat stiffened bangs and mumbled a single word.

“Home.”

“Right…” Shifting in her seat she turned the key in the ignition, waiting patiently for Yoongi to close the door and put on his seatbelt before pulling out of the parking lot and into the busy evening traffic.

The atmosphere in the small vehicle was strained. Though she was pretty sure that it was mostly just her. That single exhausted stare had reminded her far too much of the first moment they’d spent together.

The anger and disgust he’d displayed when speaking to her was such a contrast to the sweet man that’s made dinner for her and asked about her day. Frankly she was terrified that despite the bonding they’d managed everything would go out the window the moment she said the wrong thing.

She glanced over at the young man curled up in the seat beside her when traffic paused at a red light. He’d tucked his legs beneath him somehow, head resting against the glass of the window as he stared out at the hustle and bustle of the street outside.

Their gazes met for the briefest of moments in the reflection of the window but she quickly averted her eyes and refocused her attention on the red light.

They still hadn’t spoken by the time she pulled into the driveway, each lost in their own quagmire of thoughts and emotions as she unlocked the front door. Luckily she’d let the dogs out into the backyard before she’d left so they weren't there to greet them when they walked inside.

She stepped to the side as Yoongi brushed past her at the door. He only paused long enough to kick his shoes off before making a beeline straight for the hallway leading back to their bedroom, presumably with the intent of taking a long and much needed hot shower.

Her fist curled around her keys as she stood in the entryway for a moment longer rationalizing his silence. Rose has promised the shift was going to be an easy one, though nothing was ever easy in the restaurant industry, or predictable for that matter.

With a sigh she kicked off her own shoes, making her way into the kitchen and tossing her keys on the counter as she busied herself with the motions of making dinner. There was no point in dwelling on it now. What was done was done and she’d just have to deal with the fallout when it came. And hopefully it wouldn’t be nearly as bad as she was expecting it to be.

***

They still hadn’t spoken by the time dinner had been made and consumed and the dishes had been washed and put away. The living room was silent as they sat tucked into their respective corners of the couch. She scrolled through social media on her phone, eyes glancing over to his partially snoozing form every now and again to check on him.

The frown between his eyebrows had eased up slightly, though the tension in his shoulders was a long way from easing up. She couldn’t help but to sigh. Every cell in her being was screaming for her to speak. Ask if he was okay, ask how his day went or if he regretted any of it.

Before she could say anything though her thoughts were interrupted by a whine from one of the dogs laying at their feet, followed by a massive crashing boom that rumbled through the tiny house and rattled some of the dishes in the cabinets.

Yoongi jolted awake at the sound, wild eyes seeking out her frantic form as she bolted down from the couch to grab a hold of Champ’s harness. The three legged dog was in a full panic, struggling so harshly against the harness that had he been in a collar he’d have surely choked himself to death.

“Shh baby. I’m here.” her soothing tones seemed to calm the dog for a moment but another resounding thunderclap shook the house, followed by the roaring hammer of raindrops on the roof. The cacophony of sound sent the dog into such a frenzy he was climbing into his owner’s lap in a desperate attempt to shield himself from the sudden onslaught of sound.

Yoongi stared on in confusion, unsure on how to help and yet reaching out an unsteady hand just in case there was something he could do.

“Hey…” His fingertips brushed against her shoulder and her head whipped around, eyes filled with panic. He held his hands up in surrender until the panic faded slightly from her eyes. “Is there...is there anything I can do to help?”

After a calming breath she nodded, shooting him a hesitant smile over the trembling mass of fur in her arms. “In the laundry room is a kennel. It’s folded flat beside the washing machine under a pile of blankets. Could you bring it and the blankets here?”

Yoongi nodded, jumping to his feet and making his way down the hall to the laundry room. It took him only a moment to find the kennel in question, a massive metal monstrosity folded flat and leaning against the wall with a large pile of blankets on top. Carefully he lugged it to the living room, wincing at the scraping sound when he almost lost the blankets tucked under his arm and the kennel dragged slightly on the hallway floor.

“Where do you want it?” He huffed, leaning it against the arm of the sofa as he waited for further instruction.

After pointing out a spot for it she began giving him instructions on how to set it up, telling him in quiet tones to pull Kaia’s bed into the huge expanse. The second the bed was in place Champ was scrambling from her lap, shoving past Yoongi to curl up in the bed. He tucked his snoot beneath his tail, eyes shut tight with the tiniest of whimpers as Kaia climbed in calmly after him.

Thunder rumbled through the room, causing the two humans to flinch and yet in the safety of the kennel Champ was quiet.

“Just toss the blankets over the top. But keep the door open, that way they can come out once the storm is over.” Y/n sighed, bracing herself on the side of the sofa as she stood and nodded in approval when Yoongi created the perfect dark cave for the two pups to cuddle within.

“Huh...that actually worked.” Yoongi wondered aloud as he made a few final adjustments to the blankets before returning to his corner of the sofa.

She nodded, joining Yoongi in tucking herself in and shooting him a tired smile. “I think it’s an instinct thing. Wolves usually hide out in caves during storms. Or at least I think they do. Some call to their ancestors or something like that. Either way Champie boy’s terrified of storms and this is the only way he stays calm.”

“Ah...that explains why your friend Rose called him Thunderchicken at work today when she asked about him.”

She snorted,a soft smile curling her lips as she stared lovingly down at the kennel. “He’ll protect me from every dark shadow and passing car at the drop of a hat, but come rainy season he’s nowhere to be fun.”

Yoongi couldn’t help but chuckle at the thought, reminded of the few moments he’d spent alone with the dogs and the shepherd had gone charging at the windows anytime a car honked or a person walked by. “We all have our weaknesses. Man and beast alike.”

She tilted her head,nose crinkled as she grinned in his direction. “Oh? And what’s your weakness oh great Man Beast?”

His laugh came out almost as a bark, catching her off guard and sending her into a tizzy of giggles that had him grinning from ear to ear.

“Honestly? A good strong cup of coffee and a nap. Nothing gets me weaker than a good long nap.” At that he yawned, though it was quickly interrupted by a flicker of the lights.

“Oh...well…” Y/n began to speak but the moment the power went out and the house went dark she yelped, launching herself across the sofa and right into Yoongi’s surprised grasp.

He sat, motionless, afraid to startle the trembling form in his grasp any further. She sniffed, clutching his clothes desperately as another rumble shook the house.

“Looks like Champ’s not the only thunderchicken huh?” Yoongi mumbled, clutching her closer as she struggled in his grip and smacked him weakly on the chest. He chuckled, fingers carding through her hair as she eased up in her struggles and collapsed back into him.

“Stupid…” She mumbled, face radiating heat that she prayed didn’t transfer through his shirt and into his skin to alert him to the effect his proximity was having on her.

They continued on like this for the rest of the night. Even when her breath had slowed to an even rhythm and her body had relaxed fully into his he refused to move. His heart pounded against his ribs though his mind refused to admit the effect she was having on him. Eventually though it slowed, along with his breathing as well. As the final distant rumbles sounded in the far off distance the house was still, and all its occupants slept.

*** The next day dawned bright and clear. Yoongi groan, stretching long and hard in his place on the sofa, eyes blurrily trying to take in his surroundings. His nostrils twitched, catching the scent of heavy wafting towards him and dragging him from the remaining depths of his sleep deprived mind.

He rolled to his side, eyes greeted with the sight of a glorious steaming cup of black coffee. He grinned, bouncing himself into a sitting position as his long fingers curled around the mug and pulled it in to allow the steam to cascade over his face. He spotted a sticky note that’d been held in place on the table by the mug, grin spreading from ear to ear as he read his wife’s beautiful flowing handwriting.

“Went to the grocery store to grab some stuff for breakfast.

I could tell your day at work yesterday was tough so I let you sleep in.

Hope that’s okay

~y/n”

Champ hobbled over, pulling a grin from the man as he reached out a free hand to scratch absentmindedly at the pup’s head and ears. “Hi there buddy, feeling a little better after last night I see.”

The dog titled his head, goofy shepherd grin on his face as he sat at Yoongi’s feet and leaned in for more scratches. Their bonding though was interrupted by a knock at the door and a sharp bark from Champ who bolted towards the door, barking his head off as his tail wagged a mile a minute.

“Alright boy, easy. I’m coming, I'm coming.” Yoongi grunted as he shoved himself to his feet, regretfully leaving his cup behind as he moved Champ out of the way and eased the front door open.

“Excuse me Sir. I don’t mean to disturb you.”

Yoongi shook his head, a hesitant smile forming at the police officer’s apologetic gaze.

“No officer, it’s alright. But is there anything I can help you with?”

“Ah yes, I was assigned to the assault case of one y/l /ln. We were investigating the crime scene when we came across this phone. Once the case was closed we tried to get in touch with her to return the phone but haven’t had the ability to reach her.” The officer rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly as he held out the phone in question.

“I figured I’d try at her home but, it seems like since you’re home so I’ll just be able to give it to you.” He smiled kindly as Yoongi took the phone in hand.

“Thank you officer. I really appreciate it.”

After saying their goodbyes Yoongi shut the door and made his way to the sofa in the living room. His fingers curled around the familiar object, unsure why its weight felt so strangely right in his hands.

His fingers swiped across the dark screen, eyes going wide at the amount of missed calls and messages that scrolled across the screen.

47 missed calls, as many missed text messages and 4,762 missed emails. His eyes widened as he scrolled through the messages, names registered under the missed calls that at once felt familiar and strange when he uttered them out loud.

Tapping on one of the voicemails he inhaled sharply as twin voices boomed out of the phone’s speakers.

“Hyung!”

“Shut up Tae I got this!”

“Hurry Jiminie!”

“Yoongi hyung! It’s Jimin! We’ve been trying to get a hold of you for days!”

“Hyung we miss you!”

“Tae come ooonnnn!”

“Sorry oppaaaa.”

A groan sounded through the speakers and the voice started up again. “I know you weren’t looking forward to the trip but you really should have come. It’s honestly been the most relaxing thing we’ve done together.”

“Oh yeah! Namjoon hyung tracked down the lady that you threw overboard!”

“Aish Tae don’t say it like that!”

“Namjoon hyung! What was the lady’s name?”

A third voice grunted out, though further back than the other two had been.

“Her name? I mean I didn’t really track her down, she works for the company we rented the ship from. But...her name is y/n.”

A high pitched screaming began in his ears as he looked up at the named woman that’d walked through the door at that very moment.

“Yoongi?” Her arms were laden with bags from the grocery store. She pushed past the dogs, giving him a hesitant smile that quickly faded at the look of rage on Yoongi’s face.

“When..were you going to tell me?”

“I’m sorry?” Placing the bags in her hands on the sofa she took a step towards him, though he jumped up from the sofa and backed away a step as he glared at her in sheer and utter disgust.

“I remember. Everything. When...when in the fuck were you going to tell me??”

"Yoongi please, let me explain.." She reached out as if to touch him but he quickly jerked his arm away.

Stumbling backward he blindly moved towards the kitchen, rage and confusion filling him as he tried desperately to make sense of what he'd learned.

"You lied to me. Day in and day out, you fucking lied. About who I am and what our relationship is." He growled, the high pitched whine beginning to sound even louder in his ears as he braced himself against the counter.

A throbbing began to form between his eyes and he growled again as he sensed her presence behind him.

"Yoongi please, I didn't want this to happen. I swear I didn't want to lie. About you...about us...any of this."

She reached for him again but he turned quickly to glare her down.

"You didn't WANT to lie!?! How's about telling the fucking doctors you weren't my wife? How about admitting to me that I'm some...fucking idol or some shit?" He shook his head, trying desperately to clear the spots from his eyes so he could focus on the betrayal that was her desperate gaze.

" I know, and you're right. At any point in time I could have stopped this. But you were in such a delicate state. The doctors were afraid the damage to your memory was permanent! That it would only get worse over time! And I just...I wanted to take care of you. I needed to. To thank you."

"To fucking thank me?? For what? And fucking how?? Again, you fucking lied to me. You let me believe I was some...some stay at home worthless piece of shit of a dish washing husband. You...fucking Christ woman you let me fall in love with you…"

He shook his head again, willing the words to continue to spew forth, hoping the anger would keep him on his feet. And yet, the buzzing in his head continued to grow. The black spots became clouds that grew to surround the edges of his sight. And once again he was falling.

Once again his vision was fading to a single pinpoint. Her face. The worry and regret and fear in her eyes.

The tiny forget me not earrings nestled snugly in her ear lobes.

At first there was only sound. And then….nothing.

#bts boulangerie #yoongi x reader #min yoongi x reader #bt min yoongi #bangtan suga #suga amnesia #yoongi amnesia au #bts yoongi amnesia au #yoongi imagine #bt angst #bts fluff #yoongi angst #yoongi fluff #bts x reader insert #bts fanfiction #yoongi fanfiction #my writing

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justalittlelitnerd · 4 years ago

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Spellhacker by M.K. England

Everyone loves a little spot of brightness in the middle of the bleak.

I’ve been looking forward to this book since I read The Disasters all those months ago and I gotta say it did not disappoint.

If push came to shove I would say that I liked The Disasters better, but I think that’s a matter of personal preference. Also M.K. England set a really high bar with their debut novel and it was always going to be hard to top in my opinion so I didn’t expect Spellhacker to be better, but it was good in a very different way.

Much like The Disasters, the characters are what really drove this book. I am a sucker for found family and friends to lovers and complicated relationships and this book satisfied on all counts. The diversity didn’t feel forced or pandering, but natural within the relationships and the world and the story. Their identities were not a point of contention and the story didn’t revolve around the trauma of being themselves, but rather the trauma of the plague that killed their families.

Which let me tell you I was nervous about reading this book in the midst of a pandemic, but it was a fairly different scenario which made it easier to consume.

It was so heartwarming to see a nonbinary character as the love interest because it’s not something I’ve seen often or maybe ever (I’m wracking my brain and honestly struggling so if you have any NB recommendations that would be cool!)

My only ~complaint~ which is minor because I really enjoyed this book, is that the ending felt a little rushed, especially because Diz was unconscious for their escape. But the ending was so fluffy and cute that I’m kind of okay with it?

Anyway, keep reading for some fun and sarcastic quotes!

Dedication: To everyone whose struggle is invisible. Hey. I see you. We got this.

Maz is not my thing, though. You want your ex’s social media profiles hacked so they look like an ass? I’m on it. With maz, I’m useless.

When I draw back just enough to see Remi’s eyes, they look almost determined. Like there’s something right on the tip of their tongue that they just can’t quite say, but they’re daring me to guess. We’ve been here before, lived in this exact moment, stood right on the cusp and challenged each other. Back away, move closer, what’ll it be? Are you feeling brave tonight?

“What I think is that you want to have one last amazing job where you get to hit things and take home a big paycheck, but you want me to be the one to say yes so you can act all noble and resigned to your fate.”

Asshole. But the world doesn’t give him many chances to show off the things he’s good at, so I let it go. The whining is just for effect.

There were always lots of teachers from outside cities, here on some kind of grant program. Go work with the sad orphan children and have your student loans forgiven! There were always obnoxiously sincere and patronizing.

Much of it glows with neon, with maz, with money and desperate forward-looking optimism. The parts that don’t aren’t parts you want to visit anyway.

Sleep and I aren’t on speaking terms.

My gaze slides from their hair to their eyes. And there we pause, suspended in time, under the stars and the neon of our city, locked in connection. The air becomes heavy.

They open their eyes again, and the world falls out from under me. I’m pinned, my lungs and vocal cords frozen, my mind perfectly blank. Just say it, my brain screams as it comes back online. Stay, please stay, I can’t come with you, but I don’t want to be without you. Please stay.

This whole thing is manageable. I’ve pulled myself together before. I’ve let the seams get loose, though, let too much spill out into the open. Left myself vulnerable.

Gratitude surges in my heart for this cousin of mine, the one person on this planet who just gets me, doesn’t try to change me, who always gives me exactly what I need. No more, no less. Space when my thorns are out, love when I’m falling apart, independence and support in perfect balance.

I try to pull it all back inside, but it’s out there now, spilling over and raw and plain to see.

And that sends a shot of pure panic through me. Everything’s exposed, naked and bleeding, and people always say they’ll stay...but it’s not true, it’s not. No one can really say, not for certain, so what’s the point of anything, of--

“I know,” I manage. And those two words cost more than I have to give.

Two swears from Ania in less than a week. This is just a day full of unicorns. And then I trip over a maz mine, which summons a literal charging unicorn, and I deeply and instantly regret every thought I’ve ever had in my life.

Less than a day until we change the world, or die at the bottom of a very deep hole in the ground, never to be seen again. I always thought I’d die in a suitably dramatic way.

#spellhacker #M.K. England #science fiction #sff #ya #books #book quotes #quotes #book blog #booklr #ya books #sff books #diversity #nonbinary characters #magic

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natashabarnes · 6 years ago

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To preface: Avengers: Endgame shook me to my core and I needed to find a constructive, healthy way to talk about what I am feeling and this seemed as good a way as any. This is an endeavor seeking emotional intelligence. So I’m here to talk about how media can affect us, honest-to-goodness grief, and yeah sure, my opinions and most importantly, Natasha Romanoff. There will be spoilers, obviously. You’ve been warned.

It’s late afternoon on Friday, May 7th, 2010. I’m a super-soon-to-be-college-graduate, and I’ve just missed my bus home. There are few places grimmer than where I currently found myself: the Inter-City Bus Terminal in Reading, Pennsylvania. The good news was that buses from Reading to New York ran roughly every two or three hours most of the day, I was going to be fine. I was going to be late, but I was going to be fine. At the risk of sounding dramatic, I didn’t know it but I had a date with destiny that evening. Since I couldn’t imagine sitting around and waiting in a bleak af bus terminal, I sought refuge a mere block-and-a-half away at the R/C Reading Movies 11 & IMAX. Lucky for me, I was able to schlep my suitcase and (always) large purse over right in time for a showing of Iron Man 2. I remembered Iron Man (2008) to be a whole lot of fun so I sprung for a movie ticket to be able to watch most of Iron Man 2 before I had to catch my bus. I knew nothing about this film going in and I was having a good time up until the moment Scarlett Johansson came on screen as Natalie Rushman (who even me, a noob S.H.I.E.L.D./espionage sector of Marvel, knew was actually Natasha Romanoff, aka the Black Widow). Once she made her entrance into Tony Stark’s personal fitness center, I wasn’t having a good time, I was having a great time…and also a weird time. I was in complete awe of her; I hung on her every word, her every move. Everything about her radiated a sense of intelligence, purpose, intention, and most alluring to me, confidence. Looking back I realize I was seeing the kind of woman I wanted to be; not only did she have every trait I wanted as a person, she seemed to be this unattainable personified perfection. At the time, I wrote off my fascination with her pretty quickly as the voice in my head said “but you’ll never be like that, you know that, right? You’ll never have those things.” I had to leave to catch my bus just as Rhodey showed up to Justin Hammer’s Stark Expo presentation and at the time that was pretty much that.

Let’s skip ahead. It’s the evening of Wednesday, April 24th, 2019. Thanks to the kindness of my best friend/basically sister, I was able to see Avengers: Endgame a day early. I’m a mess. I’m soaking wet from the collar bone up and my eye makeup is every place on my face with the exception of my eyes. I’ve been sitting for over three hours and somehow I’m out of breath, my sweat is cold. My status of Full Blown Mess was credited to the fact that I had to watch Natasha Romanoff die violently, fiercely, and courageously. The shock I felt that night was all-consuming. I kept saying to my friend through hard sobs, “I just thought she’d be safe. I really thought she’d be safe.” So many people I know at this event found me after the fact to check in with me. Am I okay? Do I need anything? The only answer I came up with on the fly was “I will be, it hurts now. But I’m just…so proud of her.” More on that later, but basically, people were so kind and if I had to be a mess, at least I was among people who also cared and understood where I was coming from. While my friend engaged in a last bit of work for the day, I sat waiting, attempting to calm down by staring at costume designer Jany Temime’s recent Instagram post where she selfied with Scarlett expressing excitement about working on the upcoming Black Widow film. I reminded myself that this night was not goodbye, just a very jarring “see ya later.” Of course the present is not necessarily made easier to bear just because more (and potentially the best) is yet to come.

What a difference nine years made. I’d gone from casual move-going fan who’d only read Spider-Man comics when I had time to being a hardcore, ride-or-die fan of Marvel Comics and the Marvel Cinematic Universe. My library had grown exponentially, along with my knowledge of these characters, and let’s not overlook my closet’s growth after falling into the deep pit of cosplay. I can’t exactly put my finger on the “when” of it, but at some point I stopped stifling the portion of my heart that belonged to superheroes and let them take over with complete abandon. I’d always had a heavy habit of trying to be what other people wanted me to be. Though I may have lived very independently, in retrospect my choices and interests were so often chosen for the satisfaction of other people (I am not assigning blame to anyone but myself on this one). Superheroes serve as a perfect example of a passion of mine I chose to shut down for so long. Once I leaned into that passion, I felt so much more complete. It’s no surprise that Natasha Romanoff was the character I ended up being most passionate about.

Natasha is a strong woman who spent a lot of her life in the service of others across moral and political spectrums. She followed their orders always and has plenty of regrets about her past. Maybe I was self-projecting, but throughout my dedicated years as an MCU viewer and Black Widow comic reader, I always saw Natasha’s arc as two parts:

1) a woman coming to terms with what she’s been and what she’s done seeking to move forward in a more universally beneficial direction.

2) a woman learning who she is, what she wants and choosing to act of her own volition.

Obviously the two are deeply connected. While her past experiences may have made her moral compass more grey than that of her peers, she’s a woman who wants the Right Thing To Do to be the choice she makes of her own agency. There’s a beautiful deleted scene from Captain America: The Winter Soldier where Nat speaks to Nick Fury for the first time in confidence after discovering he faked his death and did not include in on the secret. “I needed to keep the circle small. You would have done the same thing,” he says. “I know,” she replies, “that’s a problem.” A scene she has with Steve Rogers discussing trust that made the final cut achieves a similar idea. In past appearances in the MCU, Natasha had expressed a desire to make amends for her past and seemingly had started to do so through her work with S.H.I.E.L.D. and her participation the Battle of New York. These moments in Cap2, as the fandom frequently refers to it fondly, are less about her outward actions and more about her inward struggles. What she seems to learn by the end of the film is that letting people in is a key part of her goal of a truer sense of self. By the time we meet her in Captain America: Civil War, within the first hour of the film she delivers one of my favorite quotes as the family around her begins to split apart, “Staying together is more important than how we stay together.” Nat’s journey continued to be one of finding self-possession, self worth and using that greater sense of self to give back to others, both the found family around her and the innocent she can protect.

With all of this in mind, Avengers: Endgame is my favorite MCU film and features my favorite Natasha Romanoff content we’ve seen so far. From the moment the film begins, she is a woman hell-bent on remedying the greatest tragedy in the history of the world. Long gone is the woman we met in her first two films who did the bidding of an organization and/or focused mainly on giving back to those she felt she owed. In Endgame, Natasha aims to save the world, to bring back everyone lost, to restore families. We first see this when she agrees to find Thanos with the team and reverse the snap. When that mission fails, we skip ahead five years and that’s when I personally really lost it. In five years, Natasha has never stopped trying to fix the world. Let’s be clear, every other member of the original six Avengers most definitely has stopped trying to find an antidote to The Thanos Problem. Sure, Steve is trying to fix things in a different, more practical way, but there’s still an acceptance of the circumstances in his actions. The sight of her alone broke my heart and filled me with a sense of honor. This is a woman we have always seen in control and put together and when we find her she is a noble, beautiful wreck. She’s abandoned most self care, wearing only her depression clothes, and surviving off hope and peanut butter sandwiches desperately communicating with allies around the universe. These people make time for her but are clearly losing patience with her and her insistence that not only can this be fixed, but that it is all of their responsibility to do so. And in case it wasn’t obvious enough how much she’s changed, this scene gives us what I believe will be (for now at least) Nat’s most iconic moment on screen. “I used to have nothing, and then I got this…this job, this family. And I was better because of it. And even though they’re gone…I’m still trying to be better.” Nat sums up her entire character arc in this one delicate and stunning moment showing just how strong allowing herself to be vulnerable has made her. Loving has only made her braver, caring has only made her more tenacious, and giving has made her unstoppable. She is, in this moment, the woman she always wanted to become.

Remembering the aforementioned scene is absolutely necessary when absorbing Natasha’s choice later in the movie to sacrifice her life so that her team can get the soul stone. Her entire life has lead her to this moment. Yes, killing off the only female from your original team is a bold move with a LOT of weight attached to it, and one that can definitely be seen as shortchanging her, but I just can’t see it that way. Natasha Romanoff made the ultimate heroic choice, one that the rest of the film hinges on. My brain can’t navigate the concept that fans have been robbed of her unnecessarily without also hearing a diminishing of the selfless choice she made and the course she followed in the time we’ve known her and beyond. It’s only when I think of the alternate concept of Clint dying for the soul stone that I feel completely, hypothetically swindled (though while we’re talking about him let’s also not forget how excellent it was to see a man and a woman with no blood relation platonically love one another unconditionally). Please don’t misunderstand, if you are angry, I respect that, we all deal with stuff different ways, this is just my take. Natasha Romanoff earned that moment. Is it devastating to watch? One thousand percent yes, but what I felt even more deeply than the devastation was pride. I am so proud of this character that in no way can I bring myself to see this choice as abuse or mistreatment of her character. In that moment, she was magnificent. Natasha Romanoff died valiantly, unafraid, and of her own free will so that everyone else could live. Natasha is a hero of the highest standard, full stop.

Entertainment Weekly recently featured a half-hour interview with the original six Avengers to promote Endgame. I was more than moved to hear Scarlett speak about Nat’s arc and confirm what I’d been absorbing as an audience member for years. “She’s come into her own as a woman saying ‘who am I and what do I want and what do I need out of my relationships and also out of my own self’ and she’s someone who is understanding her own self worth.” Without going into deep detail, watching Scarlett’s performance as Natasha has affected me in a way I can only describe as profound. Every MCU film she appeared in had at least one moment that hit a nerve inside me in ways equally gentle and harsh, but still every nerve was hit with the reassurance of knowing that if she could change, I could too. Catalysts for personal growth can come from anywhere and at my most lost somehow I remembered that moment sitting in a theatre watching Iron Man 2. Something in my brain told me to follow that feeling I had watching her, not in an effort to emulate her completely, but to see an example of someone one who is “my own woman–first, last and always.” Natasha taught me that self love, self worth and opening yourself to others are traits more powerful than lightning, stronger than a suit of armor and they’d protect me more than a shield. In the years I’ve watched and read this character, my life has changed for the better in every way. She’s been a gift to me and the gratitude I feel is overwhelming. I may have saved myself, but Natasha taught me how. As fans I think we all love having more media to look forward to, especially when that media features an inspirational figure for us. Before Endgame I’d frequently have passing thoughts reminding me that someday the time of Scarlett’s particular incarnation of Natasha will be over. Who would I be without this character? After Endgame, I’m less afraid of that future. No matter what form of this character I will have in my life, I will always follow her example and I will try to be better.

#black widow #natasha romanoff

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nevillelongsbottom · 6 years ago

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microwave meals and math student meltdowns pairing: rowan khanna x andre egwu x charlie weasley word count: 2,597 links: ao3 for the @rowanprotectionsquad june ships event

Here is Rowan Khanna’s predicament.

There is a fraternity house three blocks down hosting the party of the year – red solo cups, booming bass, sex on the dishevelled heap of coats – but Ben Copper has just asked Rowan if he’d do Ben a solid and cover his shift down at the 24-hour library, where apparently the math majors have set up tents trying to cram for their finals. Rowan’s curiosity is piqued. He wants to know what kinds of snacks math majors eat to keep them alive, and fuck, he’d just like to spend a night in the library and pretend he’s Night at the fucking Museum.

But Bill Weasley is at that party, and Rowan has spent the past year of his college life losing his shit and discovering his sexuality over Bill Weasley.

Whichever option he chooses, he is absolutely fucked. If he decides to whittle away his almost-blossoming college life by taking a free shift at the library, he will miss out on Bill Weasley (but not miss out on the joy of inhaling book-smell, an activity Rowan doesn’t get to do so much now that he can’t even afford a book a month unless it’s digital and on sale). If he goes to the party, he is going to have a terrible time because he can barely stand the burn of alcohol in the back of his throat and because he can also barely stand anybody else at the college. He should’ve gone somewhere better. He should’ve done Harvard – but he can barely afford this run-of-the-mill state college, so where the hell else could he have gone?

Doesn’t stop him regretting, though. He’ll never be Bill Gates now.

Spinning around on the barstool behind the desk of the record store he works in, he decides to consult Tumblr. Rowan is startlingly popular on the website, yawning out his thoughts about every franchise that takes off everywhere across the social media spectrum and smashing out a fanfic now and then. Occasionally a fanfic involving copious amounts of sex, because Rowan has to make up for his saint-like lifestyle somehow, and he’s never going to manage enough food to eat more than microwaveable pasta for the rest of his student life. People also keep sending him asks about college. He’s not sure how to answer, because the real answer to surviving college is never sleeping, making sure to eat three meals a day even if they’re all Pot Noodle, and studying so hard he’s started getting migraines.

anonymous asked you: be a good Samaritan and go help your friend at the library xx

anonymous asked you: you’ll get other chances with that guy you like. parties are shit anyway

Rowan groans so loudly at the messages that a patron whose entrance he hadn’t noticed gives him a frightened look, and he shoots an apologetic look back. It’s certainly not his job or his prerogative to scare customers off from his own stresses, and he tries to shift the thought as he asks if the customer is looking for anything specific –

and joyfully enough for Rowan, he is indeed. So the predicament gets to sit a little longer in the back of his brain.

By the time he’s finished work and has consumed a dinner of grilled cheese, he’s long since given up on the idea of the party. He doesn’t feel damn near sociable enough, and just the thought of drinking alcohol makes his stomach churn; Rowan’s not so good at surviving an entire day without a nap, and he wonders if it’d be acceptable just to doze off behind the front desk to the lull of weeping students. Or maybe he could just read.

Maybe write a chapter or two of his ongoing no-powers high school Spiderman and Deadpool romance epic.

The library’s pretty quiet for all the myths he’s heard: when he arrives, there are indeed actual camping tents set up where some tables used to be and a good selection of about ten math majors all camped out inside and a couple milling about with packets of crisps. One boy is eating a pot of pasta in the doorway to the library kitchen; Rowan figures that the anarchy has already been installed, so brews himself a cup of tea and takes his spot at the library front desk, picking at the various knickknacks and tchotchkes.

He’s slight enough from his pasta-related malnutrition to be able to fit into the bucket chair with his legs crossed, and he serves an hour in peace with his cup of tea and his Kindle and a trashy gay romance novel he bought for a dollar on the Kindle store. He used to feel guilty, but he can’t find it in himself to even summon a single piece of guilt shrapnel; he spends so much time reading textbooks with sentences he has to decipher like he’s a codebreaker not a student that he needs some kind of switch-off, and who’s to say he isn’t allowed a bit of mind-numbing reading?

And, all in all, Rowan’s having a pretty decent conclusion to his dilemma when he hears the sound of footsteps approaching and glances up from between the pages of unabashedly shameful sensual pottery. It’s a math student. His cheeks are tear-stained.

“Got any tissues?” he asks nervously. Rowan does not, but he can’t say the same for his well-stocked maze of a temporary desk, and he finds a packet in one of the jam-packed drawers, handing it over to the student, whose arms are surprisingly muscular for a math geek. Rowan wonders if he’s in the soccer team; he’s too short for basketball. He asks. The math boy laughs. “Oh, no, I’m not in a big sport. I’m on the lacrosse team, but I’ve taken a break for the math stakeout.”

“Have you considered that studying at home might be more relaxing?” Rowan asks, offering the math boy a stress ball; he declines, likely on the fact that it’s the grottiest thing Rowan’s ever had the misfortune of picking up and he immediately counters it with a choking amount of hand sanitiser.

“I work best under stressful conditions,” math boy elaborates. “And since I’m living in a tent, I don’t have time to worry about all the stupid things I usually worry about, like plucking my eyebrows or what clothes I’m wearing or how my hair looks.”

Math boy has little more than a buzzcut. Rowan raises his eyebrows, but says nothing, and avoids letting his eyes linger for too long on the math boy’s incredibly extra outfit of a striped turtleneck and wide leg red corduroy pants with some on-trend ugly Nikes. Rowan has to admit that he’s good-looking, and he does like math boy’s dedication, and he hasn’t had sex since that time with his best friend in the back of a rental in high school. So. He wouldn’t mind.

“I’m Andre,” math boy says. Shit. He’s likely noticed Rowan’s unsubtle idea of checking him out, but the name drop can only be a good sign.

Rowan goes in for the handshake. He’s so thirsty that he practically gets flushed from that alone. “Rowan. Khanna. History.”

And, with that, Andre returns to his inevitable doom and Rowan returns merely to imagining the fires of passion. It’s not that he’s ever been particularly interested in sex, or romance, or any of that - but it’s been way too long, and he’s going to cry if he eats any more microwave meals, and he wants someone to distract him from the call of the void that seems to follow being a single college student with at least two crushes. He groans.

“Problem?” an inquiring voice laughs. Rowan recognises the accent: it’s Southern and hillbilly but too gentle to belong to an actual hillbilly, and his head snaps up, expecting Bill Weasley and his tousled hair and his fang earring and his accepting attitude and his lax alternative style–

but it’s just an amused Charlie, and Charlie’s no Bill. He’s shorter, with a shaved head, an explosion of freckles, and a dragon tattoo. But God, Rowan thinks. As handsome as Bill. Just less outgoing. Charlie purportedly just lets things happen.

“I hate being a student,” Rowan sighs, and Charlie concurs. Their eyes meet long enough for Rowan’s heart to skip a beat. He looks like Bill.

Charlie leans in.

“Bathroom?”

“Oh, Christ, please.”

Rowan doesn’t bother making a sign explaining his absence; nobody seems to want to speak to him, and that’s probably because it’s eleven at night and the only people in the library are the math crew, those lacking in the will to live, and him.

And he’s now backed up against the wall of the disabled toilet with Charlie under his waistband, so he’s not sure he gets to stack up well anymore.

Charlie makes short work of Rowan and lets him sink to the floor, breathless. He sets himself up, legs wrapped around Rowan, but sits still anyway. It’s a shit vantage point.

“Math?” Charlie asks.

“History.”

“Cryptozoology.”

“What the hell’s that?”

“I get to go on field trips to find wendigos.”

“Oh, my fiery feet! My burning feet of fire!”

“That’s the one. Can you get on all fours?”

Rowan does, resisting the familiar urge to gasp as Charlie pushes himself between Rowan’s thighs and lets this follow with tumbling expletives. Rowan can feel Charlie’s hands shaking a little where they hold his waist, and doesn’t think he’s worth that much, honestly.

Charlie starts moving, slowly at first but unable to temper himself. “Oh, God, I can’t,” he stutters, pushing faster and faster until Rowan’s thighs ache and he thinks he might come again just from the sounds of Charlie slipping over the edge and him grabbing Rowan’s hair as he thrusts.

Rowan’s so easy.

Charlie spills over his legs and then flips him round to finish Rowan off again until he can’t see straight anymore and is lying enjoying the last of his ethereal moments before he comes back into the realisation that he’s lying on the floor of a bathroom stall and his stomach is sticky and his hair is so out of order that he looks like he hasn’t brushed it in weeks.

He groans, and starts a little when he feels something soft run across his snail trail and down to his legs.

Charlie’s cleaning him up with a wet wipe.

“Do you carry those around with you everywhere?”

“Listen, do you want to try and clean yourself up with one-ply?”

Rowan supposes not. “Thanks.”

“You volunteer librarians. You always look like you’re desperate for it.”

“I’m covering for my friend Ben.”

“Even more desperate.”

“Have you and Ben ever…?”

“No. He kinda looks like he’d fall apart. I’ve got a bit of a thing going with Tonks, though. She’s amazing.”

“So, Charlie, what exactly started you on your path of having bathroom sex with all the student librarians?”

“I don’t know, really. It happened once and then I just kept going for it. Makes me feel a little less like I want to drive away and never come back.”

Charlie runs a hand across Rowan’s cheek and tucks some of his hair behind his ear. Rowan looks back at him.

“I get that,” Rowan says, and stands up.

Rowan is not very pleasantly woken from his slumber at seven in the morning by the next student volunteer, who seems entirely nonplussed by the fact that Rowan has slept through the majority of his cover shift.

He decides to be cordial enough to return the mug he’d borrowed to the kitchen, and of course, just to ensure that Rowan Khanna never gets any peace and is always living a life of predicaments, Andre and Charlie are kissing in the corner.

“I know this library is twenty-four-hour, but you can go home,” Rowan sniffs. “You can wait before your next conquest.”

“I was waiting for you,” Andre clarifies, and he laughs awkwardly for a moment. “I hate being in that fucking tent. I’m not learning anything. It’s not even a political stance; the board don’t care. I saw you two go into the bathroom yesterday, and- goddammit, I just want to be free to do what I want to do and not eat their idea of fucking meals which have no nutritional value whatsoever!”

“If we’re having sex, we’re going to breakfast first,” Rowan says. Charlie laughs.

“I’ll pay,” he says.

They have a slightly crappy breakfast in Starbucks, but the caffeine hits Rowan like a sledgehammer, righting all the wrongs in his system like the ultimate pill. Charlie has a roll and a hot chocolate and seems at an almost eerie bliss at his corner of the table, as if the stress of student life has entirely evaded him. Andre’s still got that math student vibe of being permanently jittered. He takes two toilet breaks in the time it takes them to eat breakfast.

“Don’t you drink coffee, Charlie?” Rowan asks. He has to ask. He doesn’t even understand how someone could survive a day in college without being fuelled through it by caffeine highs and bathroom blowjob crashes. Andre’s drinking tea, but that’s still caffeine.

“No,” he says. “I don’t like it.”

Rowan is hit by a wave of newfound respect for Charlie: under the influence of no stimulants, he survives daily college life, from lessons to screwing in library bathrooms, and he never once seems to look out of place. He almost wants to think fuck Bill. Bill might be cool, but Rowan’s seen him disheveled and grumpy in sweatpants: Charlie doesn’t seem to know how to be a mess, and though Andre is clearly an emotional wreck, he’s an emotional wreck in good trousers.

“I don’t want to have sex,” he says suddenly, and Charlie looks up so quickly that Rowan is hit by the urge to retract the statement; but it’s true, so he ploughs on. “I’m tired. And I want to just – watch Netflix with you guys.”

“If I’d known you’d say that, I’d have let Charlie do me in that kitchen,” Andre huffs, but concedes. Rowan’s correctly gauged that he also doesn’t have the energy left in him for any sort of vigorous physical exercise, or even any mental exercise. Rowan wonders what would happen if he asked Andre to read a book; perhaps he’d explode. “Depends on what you’re watching.”

“My vote’s on a Stranger Things marathon,” Charlie says.

This is how Rowan finds himself making out with his crush’s brother on a math student’s sofa whilst Barb finds herself left on her own at the pool. He bloody likes Stranger Things, too, but Charlie’s handsy. He can barely catch a breath because Charlie’s made it his mission to steal them all. Andre is content with Netflix.

Doesn’t stop him from nabbing a kiss or two.

Rowan’s not sure if this was the ideal answer to his initial predicament: after all, Charlie isn’t Bill, and he now seems to have acquired two boyfriends that his parents will disapprove of and whom he barely knows at all. But he guesses that he’s probably chosen right, because he’s not hungover, and he does have two boyfriends, one of whom is kind of the supreme Bill, the other a sobbing math student with an infectious smile and a sharp sense of style.

He could’ve had worse. And this is his reflection of the day that makes it to Tumblr, right after Peter Parker’s confession of love to Wade Wilson, a true slow burn at Chapter 52.

#i write shit #i need jesus #hp #rowan khanna #fanfic #hogwarts mystery #andre egwu #charlie weasley #hprarepairnet #hptriadsnet #rowan x charlie x andre

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naeriels · 7 years ago

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Question Challenge

Rules: 1. Post the rules 2. Answer the questions given to you by the tagger 3. Write 11 questions of your own 4. And tag 11 people

@nodaski tagged me

1) What would you are this worlds’ biggest problems?

I think that if we were to catalogue even just the biggest the problems of the world, we would be standing here years from now. I think perhaps one of the biggest problems we face nowadays if forgetfulness. We are so eager to expand, evolve, reach out, change and distort ourselves all in the name of the future that we wipe away all the faults of the past, we forget all that had come to pass and as such we are doomed to repeat the same mistakes over and over again. We turn a blind eye to everything that had spiraled out of control, to all of humanity’s mistakes, to the blood drenched past that led us to this future and we draw none of the conclusions that we should have drawn till now. We are caught in an ever lasting vicious cycle of “it happened, it’s in the past, no point thinking back on it” that we are forever drawn to the same spot, albeit in different manners and various circumstances. So in a way, the world instead of evolving, in many cases stagnates or even makes ten steps back to one step forth.

2) Why do you think humans are flawed, or that intrinsically irremediable?

I think that there is no such thing as perfection, no matter how much we might strive to achieve it. And as such, yes our baseline is flawed from birth till death and there is no denying that. However, just because we are flawed does not mean we cannot strive to be better or that we need to simply surrender to the belief that no matter what we do, our design was imperfect from the beginning an that’s how we will remain without trying to aim for more.

3) If you could wipe away the sorrows of your past, your biggest regrets and worst sufferings even if they had shaped you on who you are today would you spare yourself from experiencing those things? Why so?

Hahaha ooooh boooi good question. And one I’ve been asking myself a lot. It would be tempting to erase everything and spare my past self from everything that happened. But at the same time, if I did that, whatever would remain by the end wouldn’t be me. It would be a stranger with my face and a life I wouldn’t recognize. And since I’ve always hated other people trying to change me, I won’t be the one to effectively deconstruct myself and turn me into something else. So the answer is no, I wouldn’t.

4) What is your stance on mental health and the perpetual suffering that comes from living in a capitalistic system that prioritises work and creating workers over personal aspirations?

My stance is that I hate the system and would love nothing more than to gleefully tear it down, burn it and salt its ashes. We live in a society that demands, demands, demands without offering nothing back, that puts mounting pressure on our shoulders from the very moment we enter school, that delights in belittling us and crushing our dreams, telling us how very pointless they are and that we will never amount to anything if we pursue them. We live in a society that tries to turn us into robots and is surprised when we snap, that offers us the bare bones for survival and chides us for our frustration and overall lack of hope, that takes away all that makes us who we are and rages against us when we rebel against it. It is a system designed to breed fools and mindless drones that ruins all those who wish to fight against it in whatever small ways possible. And I for one would love nothing more than to see it changed for something that actually encourages personal growth and aspirations, that encourages people to follow their dreams and offers them the means to do so, instead of kicking them in the ground. But I’m not holding my breath that anything will change...

5) Do you think there is a perpetual loss in our time of interest and growth in arts (literature, picture, music), and how do you think it influences us as humans if so?

Yes. There is a statistically proven decrease in readership and interest towards the literary arts and I think the same fact proves right for all arts including painting, music or theater. Part of it stems, I believe, from the lack of interest offered by governments and authorities to this area and quite another for the way society is shaped. We are forced - by school, by university, by work through the hectic and burdening schedules hoisted upon us - to dedicate more and more of our time to work as a whole and less to leisure time. Moreover, those inclined towards artistic pursuits are discouraged from a young age, being told such a road is impossible, will lead to nowhere and will offer them no chance to amount to something in life. As such, the Arts become shunned from both the developer and the consumer point of view. The result is that we steadily become a robotic society, one incapable of sharing the pleasure of creative pursuits with our peers, one focused so much on what must be done to ensure a livelihood that it forgets to actually live for a moment or two. Humans will slowly become less creative, less imaginative, less likely to reach out to the stars, and more gripped by everyday reality. And those that will think otherwise will simply be mocked or ignored.

6) How would you define happiness?

This is going to sound cheesy as heck but to me happiness is a cabin on the banks of a lake, in perfect silence and solitude. It’s a steady Wi-Fi connection and a roaring fire in the fireplace, a word document open with words filling up the pages and cats milling around the house in joy. It’s acceptance and approval offered without falter, it’s the chance of doing something I love as opposed to something I have to do to be able to live a decent life. It’s being able to research topics I love and writing about them. It’s teaching others and helping them unearth new knowledge. It’s all the pieces of myself buried under what must be done and what the world demands, brought together at last without fear of doing so.

7) Why do you write and continue to do so?

Because it is escapism and a way to escape the monotonous reality of everyday. Because it allows me to dream and create, to give birth to new worlds, to embark on adventures with characters I love and discover all the facets of their personality. Because it is the first thing I ever claimed for myself, my first passion, my first love and something I do not think I could survive without. Because I strive to be better and better, to reach the experience and abilities of the authors I admire. Because I do not care whether I will be remembered or not, but I wish to see my world withstand the passage of time. Because writing shapes me and defines me and I do not know who I would be without it.

8) How it feels to dream, and when do you think a person reaches the point they are no longer to do so and lose all purpose of their life?

I think dreaming might very well be a folly, a burst of optimism that will make most of us crash and burn at one point in our lives. Achieving one’s dreams is hard, a rare occurrence that makes the majority that has no chance to do so hope ever harder and suffer even more when their dreams are destroyed. I think it depends on the person, though; many manage to cling to their dreams and their hopes for a large portion of their life, relentlessly believing that no matter how old they might get, the chance is still there for them to seize. And others give up on their dreams in the very beginning, disheartened by every dashed attempt and every failed opportunity. I think the moment we lose all hope - in the world, in ourselves, in whoever is supporting us - is the moment when even that remote dream that we might have held onto gets blasted into oblivion and we lose whatever anchor was tethering us till then.

9) Do you live your life with a purpose/Do you need a purpose in life to live?

I don’t really have a purpose in life, so I guess I don’t really need one? I just move from one day to another in a state of vague uncertainty and confusion, hoping to maybe discover at one point exactly where I wish to go from here onward.

10) Does the idea of death or permanent disappearance scare you? If not, have you ever thought of disappearing?

Ironically enough, the answer is yes to both questions.

11) What is love for you?

That’s kind of complicated because I don’t really know the answer. I used to think I did. I guess love would be companionship, acceptance, support and being able to trust the other person without fear of betrayal.

And for my questions... ummmm...

1. If you would be able to save only one book, knowing all the others would disappear forever from history and recollection, what book would that be and why?

2. Do you believe in the existence of a higher being whatever its name might be or do you think there is no divine intervention in our world?

3. Do you believe humanity has learned from the mistakes of the past, or is it merely repeating the same patterns in different ways?

4. If you would be able to ask your future self one question, what would that question be and why?

5. Has there been a book, series, movie or other media that changed your life for the better?

6. What do you think offers capacity for growth and development: original fiction or fanfiction?

7. If you could change one thing in a fictional universe of your choice, what would that thing be?

8. Does the capacity for evil exists in all of us from birth, or is it merely a concept slowly bred by the world we live in?

9. If you could choose any superpower knowing that in turn it would lead to disaster of sorts occurring in the far future, what would you do?

10. Do you read works of fiction based on your mood or are those works the ones that influence the way you feel in that moment?

11. If you could save one monument from history that has been completely obliterated, what would that monument be?

Tagging: @arcane-wanderer, @nenuials, @tasmaniandevil-4, @deyanirasan, @berryblissthefangirl, @takasuga ( only if you guys want to to this ofc )

#Alex speaks #challenge #wow I wrote novels here #oops #this was fun

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20qs20somethings · 7 years ago

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Aaron, 24

1. Can you use three to five words to describe our generation? Open, shallow, vain, humanitarian, sensitive

2. Where has our generation failed and where have we succeeded? I think our generation messes up in the sense that everyone wants to be the smartest person in the room but nobody recognizes that we’re in a room together. I think we all try to outsmart each other rather than try to pick each others brains and trying to come up with a better solution. One thing I do think we’re good at is expressing ourselves. I think a lot of times we are politically correct. We try not to hurt other people’s feelings but we also know how to.

3. Who or what is your biggest motivator in life? It would have to be my fear of failure. I do know that failure will come and I’m ready for it, but also having that fear of failing to the point where I can’t get back up is a motivator for me because I don’t want to get to that point. If I do, I’ll figure it out then, but if I don't have to then that’d be great too.

4. Do you believe in love? Yes, I do believe in love but I do believe there are different types of love. There are people you're in love with, people you do love, I don’t think it’s as simple as I love you.

5. What’s something you think people assume of you based on your internet persona? I think a lot of people think I’m cooler than I am. I think people think I’m more intimidating than I am in person. I’ve had people say they’re intimidated to meet me. I’m 5’6 and 140 pounds, I’m not intimidating whatsoever. But I have been told that there’s something about my photos or the way I talk on social media.

6. What’s one thing you want people to know about you? I love to live in the moment, I don’t like to overthink too much. I think overthinking is going to be the bane of our existence because if you sit and overthink and you don’t do, time will pass and you’re going to regret. So I’m more of a doer then think about what I just did afterwards. So I’m more of a ask for forgiveness than permission type of person. Nobody dies thinking I wish I didn’t do that, but more that I wish I did do that.

7. Fill in the blank: “Happiness is _______” Comfort

8. What are your thoughts on race? I think race is just a part of your identity it’s not a thing that should be taken into consideration when looking at someone. I think it should be something that’s acknowledged. I think people should acknowledge each other's race because that’s part of what makes someone a person. But it’s not something that you need to be judged for or characterized as.

9. Do you think you’re represented in things you consume? (TV, Movies, Books, etc.) I think we’re getting to a point where I am as a black male becoming more represented as who I am. So now you’re seeing shows like Black-ish and I’m starting to see a positive representation. I’m nowhere near a thug, I’m not someone who wears saggy pants, who grew up in the hood. When I was younger I would see that all the time, and I was just wondering when I was going to see someone like me. So in Black-ish, Bow is a surgeon and Andre is part of an ad agency who have these kids who are successful. I will say a lot of the show resonates with me, but I will say that if I haven’t gone through it, I know someone has gone through something like that.

10. Who or what brings you the greatest joy in your life? Waking up. In school, I took a Sociology of Death and Dying course and it made me realize that people die every single day and put it in perspective. I think about death about four times a day and it’s really morbid, but it happens all the time. It’s me being able to wake up, walk, talk, see someone because I realize that someone else didn’t wake up today.

11. Do you think the American Dream is still alive? That depends on what you define it as. I think with the American Dream there is different definitions. A white male will have a different definition than a black male. My definition would be being able to do what I want to do and not have any obstacles that another person wouldn’t have. Is it still alive? I don’t think for me it was ever alive because if you look back, there was always this obstacle for African American blacks to get to where they want to go and they still are there.

12. Would you rather have security or fulfillment in your work? Fulfillment. Especially in this economy, there’s no sense of security. You could be laid off the next day and if you don’t like your job, why are you there?

13. What do you want out of this life? Happiness, satisfaction, fun.

14. What would you say is your biggest character flaw? I am very stubborn. No matter what it is, no matter who I’m talking to, what the topic is, I will be the most stubborn person you’ve ever met because I will not stand down if I 1. Believe in what I’m saying or 2. Just don't want to be proven wrong. It really does hinder me from getting to a solution quicker, but at the same time, I know it’s a flaw and I’m working on it, but I also won’t back down just because someone wants me to.

15. What are qualities that you value? Dedication, Loyalty, Honesty

16. Fill in the blank, “I wish we had more _______ in the world” Humility

17. What do you hope 30 will look like? I hope I look the same. I do hope I’m more established in my career. I hope I’m content with the chapter in my life that I’m in.

18. What’s the most important lesson you’ve learned so far? I think learning how to take failure and learn from it was a big lesson.

19. What’s the hardest lesson you’ve had to learn? Trusting people isn’t as hard as I made it out to be.

20. What is the best piece of advice you want to leave the world with? You have to live your life for you. You can’t live it for anyone else. Not for your parents, your boyfriend, your girlfriend, your brothers or sisters. Because at the end of the day you will be the one who has to look at yourself everyday and be with yourself all the time. You have one life, make it count.

#20qs20somethings #20somethings #adivce #love #race #representation #millennials #profile #interview #motivation #blackish

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news-mashable-yahoopartner-blog · 6 years ago

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We need to stop romanticizing the 'extremely offline' life

Remember the people who used to brag about not having cable or, better yet, not owning a television?

You know the ones (if you were alive back in the early 2000s). They were the kind of friend who showed up to trivia claiming to "know nothing about pop culture." They always thought the book was better than the movie, even when it wasn't. They bragged about not owning a television even though you saw them binge a dozen Netflix DVDs at a time.

Fast forward a dozen or so years and this figure has re-emerged, just in a slightly different form. Instead of bragging about throwing out their television, they're posting about how quitting [fill-in-the-blank] social platform has immeasurably improved their lives. While the rest of the world is rotting their brains online, they've done the impossible. They've gone offline.

And they can't wait to tell you about it.

"Being offline" is trendy in a way “being online” once was. Gross.

I know the "offline humblebragger," because I have been this person. I have been the coworker who goes on vacation, deletes Twitter from their phone for a week, and brags to the office about how much better they feel. Never mind that I immediately re-downloaded it upon landing and consumed as much poisonous viral Michael Avenatti-related content as my brain could handle before imploding. That's because I accomplished what I set out to accomplish: I earned compliments.

There are plenty of others just like me.

"I am also that person," Brian W. direct messaged Mashable, adding that deleting Twitter had still improved his mental health.

"Deleting Twitter from my phone has definitely been a good thing for my brain," Alison B. also confided to Mashable in a direct message. "And I lerv to talk about it."

Lately, it seems that there's a whole content industry dedicated to helping online people (people who spend a disproportionate amount of their lives on the internet) who dream of becoming offline people (people who spend more time "in the real world").

If you're an "online" person, you're likely to come across a story like this at least once a day: “Why quitting social media is the best decision I ever made in my life,” or “How quitting social media changed my life for good, forever,” or “Why Facebook is destroying all of your relationships,” or maybe even “100 reasons you should delete Twitter/Facebook/Instagram RIGHT NOW.”

Heck, Mashable has even written their fair share of digital detox stories (though I’d like to think we do so with far less absolutism and a heavier dose of humility).

The stories follow a relatively familiar formula: The subject expresses some sort of addiction to/unhealthy obsession with a social platform. They decide, on a whim, to quit a platform. Delete everything. Remove their digital footprint. Then, like magic, their life transforms. Their relationships improve. They suddenly enjoy the world around them. They see flowers. They feel so free.

They belong to a different world — the offline community. Us online people — well, we're just lost.

Listen, it's reasonable to fantasize about living off the digital grid. Internet addiction is a real thing. Negative social media interactions can severely impact mood. In a 2017 study, researchers found that people who used seven or more social media platforms experienced higher levels of anxiety. No wonder people romanticize the offline life.

SEE ALSO: March Mindfulness 2019: Gamers take a swing at competitive meditation

It’s the absolutism and the occasional accompanying snobbery that’s the issue. There’s been considerable amounts of research pointing to the opposite effect: Some people do experience improved mood as a result of using platforms like Twitter. Not all of us can afford to go offline, and not all of us want to, either.

We all don't want to move to your fantastical offline utopia.

Here's how one Redditor on r/OfflineDay, a new subreddit dedicated to getting people offline, describes the phenomenon:

"So I've found a sub of people bragging online about spending time offline?” user the Harmacist writes. "Am I the only [one] that feels like I'm missing something here? Wouldn't it make more sense for you guys to not have an entire subreddit if you're planning on being offline? Like mostly based on the fact that if you guys are offline, then your sub will be dead, and if you're on the sub posting and commenting, you're ruining your own aim??"

Harmacist raises a good question, but it's not even going offline that's the real problem. It's the formula this technological bildungsroman always has to follow.

Going "offline" may not give you spiritual peace

Read any of the digital detoxification narratives published in the past 24 hours, and you'll find the same plot points. Life before detox before was hell, life post-detox is Eden.

Here are just a few of the benefits one writer experienced after quitting social media, in a piece confidently entitled, "14 Remarkable Ways My Life Changed When I Quit Social Media:"

The writer has become a good listener

The writer can live a life without distractions

They don't procrastinate

They found a job

They found their life's purpose

The writer has found inner peace

Listen, I'm not about to shit on this person’s "I've found inner peace" parade. Quitting or pulling back from social media does have a measurable therapeutic effect for some folks.

But how often do we hear people — either in the stories we see published or the conversations we have on the regular — express ambivalence about their time away from social media?

When was the last time you saw a "I quit social media and I regret it" story published? How often do you hear someone say, "I deleted Facebook and frankly I'm very neutral about it," or "I have ambivalent feelings about digital detoxification."

SEE ALSO: 8 people confess why they finally deleted social media

By insisting that "online living" is a kind of viral illness and going offline its absolute cure, we set ourselves up for failure. For one, people who need to stay online – whether for work, family, or personal reasons — are made to feel guilty about it.

"I hate Facebook and am a very inactive user," A.V. told Mashable over direct message. "But it's the only easy way to keep in touch with my very large and global family."

"Some people have been hurt, confused, and annoyed by my constant ‘I'm back/I'm leaving’ activity where Facebook is concerned," Maria M. told Mashable over email. "That bothers me, because I don't want anyone to be affected negatively by my struggles with social media."

We need to have reasonable expectations about offline life. I've taken breaks from social media before and my experiences were largely "meh to above meh." I missed sharing my corny vacation highlights with my friends on Instagram. I wanted to hear every single update about the byzantine Mueller investigation. Reading a shitty book was not much better than reading a shitty article I found on Twitter. My relationships didn't markedly improve after I quit social media, and though I got more sleep, it wasn't a dramatic increase.

I even missed Gritty.

But because I felt pressure to complete the “I’m quitting social media for good” cultural narrative, I hyped up the success of my detox in conversations with my friends. “Taking a break from social media was the best decision I ever made,” I told them, even though I desperately missed every dumb meme while I was away.

Privately, I felt bad about falling short. I didn’t really want to delete every platform. I couldn’t. I love Facebook rants too much. I love Otter Twitter. I had failed at what should have been the easiest job of them all: quitting.

It doesn't have to be this way for me or for others. We can have a better digital balance.

Please. Being "extremely offline" isn't any better than being "extremely online."

There was a point in time when "extremely online" people were culturally in vogue. Now we've reached a historical moment when "extremely offline" people are trending.

What we need to do is to admit a core truth: Neither group of people is inherently cool.

Who cares where you spend your time? Online people: You're not in any way smarter or funnier for dunking on Eric Garland on Twitter. No one cares that you think Gritty is an anarchist-syndicalist. Similarly, just because you're an offline person who reads books instead of articles on Twitter doesn't make you any more educated. Neither world has the moral authority. Everyone is equally dumb. We all need to stop dreaming of greener digital pastures.

Now excuse me while I go tweet about this.

WATCH: If you're tired of oversized smartphones, try this teeny one on for size

#_author:Heather Dockray #_uuid:4a8403f2-e339-3d70-9d22-4a6591b18a76 #_category:yct:001000002 #_lmsid:a0Vd000000DTrEpEAL #_revsp:news.mashable

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meditationadvise · 8 years ago

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How To Take The Anxiety-Busting Powers Of Yoga To The Next Level

Anxiety conditions affect 18.1 percent of grownups in the United States-- that's about 40 million individuals in between the ages of 18 and 54.

Studies show that lots of college pupils today report sensation isolated, misconstrued, and emotionally delicate or unstable. As an university student myself, I could state that most of my pals have actually told me that they struggle with stress and anxiety (or distressed tendencies), as well as I typically experience the strength as well as consuming nature of these sensations, as well.

This might be because of our increased social networks usage and impractical requirements prepared by this-- we're regularly checking how several Instagram likes we're getting to specify our self-worth. Social media can be a fantastic, unifying trait, however when it becomes too consuming, stress and anxiety degrees increase.

' Anxiety is basically stressing over the future, about bad feats that haven't happened yet and possibly won't,' Jenny Taitz, PsyD, a professional psychologist at the American Institute for Cognitive Therapy in New york city City, discusses. 'Since stress and anxiety is future-focused, anything that maintains you in the minute is useful.'

So, how do we assist clear our messy as well as perpetually racing minds and locate those moments of tranquility, self-confidence, and also self-compassion? An everyday yoga exercise technique is a fantastic beginning.

Think about it: When we're on our phones, we are hunched over and our upper bodies are shut off, which results in tight shoulders and poor posture. Moreover, when we are stressed, adverse emotions cause tension in the hips, resulting in a buildup of tightness. Overuse of social media electrical outlets as well as general anxiousness because of day-to-day occasions bring about a normally stressful body throughout.

What are you doing now? Inspect in with yourself. End up being conscious of your breathing. Inhale via your nose, as well as gradually allow that exhale out as a result of your mouth. Straighten your spine, relax your shoulders, launch the stress in your jaw, as well as shut your eyes. Allow yourself to be present, and also release anything that does not serve you.

The feats I simply told you to do probably felt actually good. Including them right into your everyday yoga practice will only enhance your feelings of self-worth, reducing anxiety.

My preferred component of the day is turning my phone off for a hr (or more) as well as placing time aside for my yoga exercise practice and also body. I have never ever had a time where I stepped on the floor covering and also regretted it later. I do not have a set time when I practice each day-- but when I understand that I am overanalyzing unimportant things or I can really feel the stress in my body as well as know my stress and anxiety degrees are high, I stop, take a breath, transform off my phone, and immerse myself in an hour of yoga exercise.

Yoga has made me understand that we have complete control over our bodies and also our perspective. Everything starts and ends in your mind, and also if we slowly find out how to overcome our own thoughts and also materialize them right into positivity and also love, we can reach that blissful area of peace as well as self-love that we all seek.

Here are 6 ways you can alleviate anxiousness with your yoga method:

1. Prepare a purpose for your method.

Your purpose could be anything that stands out right into your mind that you 'd such as to dedicate your method to. Something you would love to let go of, someone you like, or a concept that you might repeat over and over. If you're having difficulty thinking of an objective, try the expression 'I suffice.' Revisit it throughout your method. You are enough. You are so enough. It is astonishing exactly how sufficient you are.

2. Integrate pranayamas (breathing workouts developed by the ancient yogis) right into your practice.

Prana means "life force energy" and yama means 'control or proficiency of.' Think of just how we charge our mobile phones every night prior to we go to sleep. This coincides concept, except we're charging our minds. Realizing and conscious of our breathing can release anxiety as well as enhance psychological quality.

I utilized to roll my eyes whenever my yoga exercise teacher would tell us to do a pranayama, and also I would continuously breathe typically. I didn't believe that simply transforming my breathing and familiarizing my inhales as well as breathes out might alter my entire state of mind. Yet during one class I was truly worried out, and also we were instructed to do a cooling breath so I chose to actually provide it a try. Currently I utilize this breath regularly in times of anxiety-- and I discovered a lesson concerning maintaining an open mind. Try making use of cooling breaths such as Sitali or Sitkari to relieve sensations of anxiety.

3. Practice sun salutations (Surya Namaskar) at the start of each practice to heat up your body as well as clear your mind.

Link your breath with your motion, devoting each movement to a breathing or exhalation. This is my preferred time to let go of any negative thoughts I've been holding into and merely allow my body step as well as exist on my mat. Suryas are additionally a bit of a workout, so flowing through them incorporated with breath consciousness leaves little space for my mind to roam and also keeps me in the currently.

4. Reverse your hunched 'texting' or 'resting at an office workdesk' posture with heart-opening presents such as bow position, camel position, or wheel pose.

Vulnerability as well as soft qualities are a lovely thing, as well as yoga advises us to stay soft via the hardships such as heartbreak. I constantly had trouble with coming into full wheel (urdhva danurasana), really feeling like there was stress as well as strain in my lower back, up until I started considering it as a heart opener. We've all had our hearts damaged by life, romance, as well as connections. Yoga exercise assists us keep our hearts open when all we intend to do is close them off. Allow your heart be wide open.

5. Soothe your hip stress through hip-opening poses.

We don't usually consider our hips, however they are the location where old emotions could obtain stuck. These stretches may feel intense in the beginning, however with a steady practice they will end up being force of habit. Take a breath right into the unfamiliar uncomfortableness of these asanas as well as breathe out as you work out much deeper right into the poses.

My preferred hip opener is pigeon pose, as it is a deep hip opener with advantages such as boosting pose, alleviating sciatic pain, and lengthening the hip flexor. Focus on exactly how your body really feels in this position or any of the hip-opening asanas. Display your breathing as well as familiarize your inhales as well as exhales. This will maintain you anchored to the existing minute.

6. Allow five minutes or even more at the end of your practice for savasana (remains present).

Many individuals skip savasana if they're ground for time, but it might be the most crucial and most tough asana of them all. Really? Resting on my back as well as practicing meditation is more difficult than a headstand?! However it holds true. Dominating the mind is a task harder than any of the literally demanding yoga exercise presents.

No issue exactly how a lot we could wish to, it's a rather a difficulty to instantly make our bodies and also minds unwind on demand. With time as well as method we will certainly be able to unwind the body muscle by muscle mass and also assumed by idea. While you're lying on your back with your eyes shut, launch any kind of stress in any kind of spaces of your body. Your face, jaw, shoulders, fingertips, and also lower back. Merely 'be.' Just you and also your breath. Cherish this moment of relaxation and thank your body for all the physical job it has actually done throughout your practice.

Incorporating any type of or all of these things right into your daily method could turn your whole day around, squash those voices of doubt, and calm an over active mind. We have so much that is asked of us from work, college, as well as culture's standards that life can be a crazy whirlwind of feelings, good and also bad.

Honor on your own for your complete amazingness and radical light by shutting off that phone, silencing those voices of doubt, and making time for you every day. Present your floor covering as well as repeat after me: 'I suffice. I suffice. I suffice.' You have actually got this.

#asana #meditation #pranayama #yoga #yoga practice

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componentplanet · 5 years ago

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GE Launches New Kitchen Hub, a 27-Inch, Netflix-Equipped, Widescreen…Microwave

If you own a microwave and use Wi-Fi, you’re probably aware that these two things don’t mesh well (pun intended). The impact of running a microwave while using Wi-Fi tends to vary depending on how much EM your microwave leaks and which frequencies your Wi-Fi network is using. If you’re on a 5GHz network, you may not see much interference, but a 2.4GHz system may choke and die when you cook a burrito, depending on the position of your hardware and the layout of your house. Microwaves and Wi-Fi, in other words, are not two things you would ordinarily combine.

Appliance manufacturers have been trying to find use cases for IoT-enabled refrigerators, toasters, and laundry machines for years, leading to an endless series of jokes about trying to surf the internet on a refrigerator. After years of attempting to sell consumers on the idea of an automatic fridge that can monitor individual zones of temperature and re-order frozen yams after you hate-eat the last bag to avoid food waste, GE has opted for a more straightforward approach: Stick Netflix on it. Seriously: The new Kitchen Hub is a 27-inch, Wi-Fi-enabled microwave with Netflix.

Before we dive into this, I need to be clear about which GE product we’re discussing. GE has announced a new version of its Kitchen Hub. This version integrates a microwave and offers features like AI-assisted computer vision to check when a dish has finished cooking. This product will not be available until late 2020. It can also function as a hub for Z-Wave-enabled devices and for GE’s smart appliance products.

Right now, if you visit GE’s website, the product you’ll see is an earlier version of the Kitchen Hub that’s actually a hood vent, not a microwave. It lacks the internal camera and AI computer vision, for obvious reasons, and isn’t Z-Wave compatible. Apart from that, it appears to have the same set of features. The hood vent Kitchen Hub runs Android 8.0, but I haven’t found anything on what the microwave Kitchen Hub will use. The hood vent is $1,200, so it’s safe to assume the new microwave will sell at or above that price point.

The New Kitchen Hub includes the Flavorly recipe app powered by SideChef. This shouldn’t be confused with Flavourly, the craft beer delivery service cum curation app. It also shouldn’t be confused with Flavory.com, which bills itself as “an online food magazine chronicling culinary stories of interest to foodies of the Central New York area,” and hasn’t been updated since 2011. None of this has anything to do with the microwave, strictly speaking, but as a western New York resident, I’m not surprised that a blog dedicated to the culinary delights of Syracuse has been dead for the past nine years. No offense to the founder, who self-identified as a magazine journalism student. That particular career path is its own punishment these days.

Let’s get back to the 27-inch widescreen microwave. The hood vent’s aspect ratio is technically 1.80, not the 1.77 of 16:9. We have no details on the microwave. Imagine the exciting discussions we can all have in the future regarding new opportunities in microwave aspect ratios as they relate to film content! Here’s GE:

The next-gen Kitchen Hub from GE Appliances is a 27-inch smart touch screen, 1.9 cubic foot microwave and ventilation combo designed to easily fit in the space above the range. Consumers can use cameras to interact with friends and family, snap and share their culinary masterpieces, and even determine when their meals are done while viewing the inside of the oven from their couch. And if cooking isn’t entertaining enough, the Kitchen Hub Micro provides access to popular apps, such as Netflix and Spotify. The addition of the microwave into the next gen Kitchen Hub allows the user a full-service kitchen experience.

This quote is the only time in the entire document where GE refers to the “Kitchen Hub Micro.” It’s referred to as the “next gen Kitchen Hub” 12x in the same press release, including in a quote by the director of the SmartHome appliance division by GE. The name of the product may be “Kitchen Hub Micro.” Unless it isn’t. Also, GE’s PR department couldn’t be bothered to actually upload a photograph of what the new system looks like. They re-used the photo from the 2018 launch instead. The photo below is from Cnet:

Image by Molly Price, Cnet

This is also the first time I’ve heard the term “full-service kitchen experience” used to describe an appliance with Netflix, Spotify, integrated cameras, and photo sharing. I’ve clearly missed some back issues of Panopticon Quarterly, not to mention Bon Appétit.

There appears to be virtually zero technical information available on the current or next-gen Kitchen Hub as relates to their technical specifications or Android capabilities. One of the product reviews on GE’s website for the original Kitchen Hub notes that the unit doesn’t ship with any kind of user manual that covers these functions. Both Kitchen Hubs are touchscreen-enabled and have an integrated speaker, but there’s no mention of Bluetooth support. That’s a meaningful feature omission in a situation like this. If you’ve spent any time in a kitchen, particularly a “full-service kitchen experience” sort of kitchen, you’re aware that kitchens can be rather loud. Dishwashers, microwaves, certain types of food prep, and running water all make their own contributions to ambient noise. Bluetooth integration isn’t a ridiculous feature to want in a device intended to operate in what is likely the loudest room of the house when in full use.

I actually can see a use for an appliance like this; it’s just not a happy one. If your life keeps you trapped in a kitchen to the point that you can’t ever get a moment to watch a movie or TV show, having a TV in the kitchen might be nice. This hardware seems purpose-built for stressed homemakers of considerable means who never get to leave the kitchen and people who seek cooking validation via social media. I can’t even tell if those are overlapping niches or not.

We don’t have any information on what kind of Wi-Fi solution the new Kitchen Hub will use. There seem to be three options here: It’s a dual-band solution that switches to 5GHz mode to use Wi-Fi while the microwave is running, the unit is shielded well enough internally to prevent interference with a Wi-Fi chip installed in the same enclosure, or the microwave can’t stream while it’s also cooking food. GE hasn’t disclosed anything on the Wi-Fi at this time.

Finally, the “next gen Kitchen Hub Micro” is a 1.9-cubic-foot microwave. The least expensive 1.9-cubic-foot microwave available on Bestbuy.com is a $250 Samsung model. I’m not claiming that’s the cheapest 1.9-cubic-foot microwave around, but it gives you some frame of reference for what a microwave of that size costs if you take it off the shelf. Is Netflix and camera integration worth $950? Certainly not to me. But the fact that the hardware is getting a second generation implies that at least somebody bought the first one.

The feature image for this story is the older Kitchen Hub, not the new “next gen Kitchen Hub.” ET regrets the fact that GE PR deliberately provided an inaccurate picture of their own product without disclosing this fact.

Now Read:

Researchers Create Skin-Based Phone Interface, Plumb Depths of Uncanny Valley

‘Smart’ Ovens May Turn On and Preheat Themselves Overnight, Which Is Totally Safe

Nike’s Android App Is Bricking Shoes Because That’s a Headline We Write in 2019

from ExtremeTechExtremeTech https://www.extremetech.com/electronics/304407-ge-launches-new-kitchen-hub-a-27-inch-netflix-equipped-widescreen-microwave from Blogger http://componentplanet.blogspot.com/2020/01/ge-launches-new-kitchen-hub-27-inch.html

#GE Launches New Kitchen Hub #a 27-Inch #Netflix-Equipped #Widescreen…Microwave

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copythemillionaire-blog · 7 years ago

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Want to Become a Multimillionaire? Do These 14 Things Immediately

"The greatest reward in becoming a millionaire is not the amount of money that you earn. It is the kind of person that you have to become to become a millionaire." -- Jim Rohn

Most people wish their circumstances would magically change for them. They don't have the desire to become better themselves so they can proactively improve their own circumstances.

Unlike most people, who simply wait and wish for luck, you can seek to become the kind of person equipped with the skills and abilities to do brilliant things.

You can become the kind of person who does highly influential work. Your work can solve pressing problems, improve people's lives, and get noticed by important people who share your work not for your sake, but for theirs! Sharing your work makes them look good because of how great it is.

The quality of who you are as a person, and the work you do, is completely within your control. But you can't wish for it to happen. You must become the kind of person who naturally attracts the success you seek.

Here's how:

1. Invest at Least 10 Percent of Your Income in Yourself

If you don't pay for something, you rarely pay attention.

Most people want stuff that's free. But if you get something for free, you rarely prize that thing. You rarely take it seriously.

How much do you invest in yourself?

How committed are you to yourself?

If you aren't investing in yourself, than you don't have any skin in the game of your own life.

If you aren't invested in your business, you probably won't do high-quality work.

If you're not invested in your relationships, you're probably more focused on what you can get than what you can give.

When it comes to self-improvement, investing 10 percent of your income in yourself will yield a 100X or more return on that investment. For every dollar you spend on your education, skills, and relationships, you'll get at least 100 dollars back in returns.

If you want to do something extremely well, you need to surround yourself with the right mentors. Anything that you'll ever do well will be the result of high-quality mentoring. If you suck at something, it's because you haven't received quality mentoring in that thing.

The best mentorships are the ones where you pay your mentor. Often, the more you pay the better, because you'll take the relationship far more seriously. You won't solely be taking in that relationship. You won't purely be a consumer. Instead, you'll be invested, and as such, you'll listen more carefully. You'll care more. You'll be more thoughtful and engaged. There will be higher consequences for not succeeding.

I invested $3,000 to get help writing my first book proposal from a highly successful writer. That $3,000 got me maybe four or five hours of his time. But in those four or five hours, he taught me what I needed to know to create an amazing book proposal. He provided me resources that dramatically enhanced and sped up my process. With his help, I was able to get a literary agent and eventually a multi-six-figure book contract.

Had I been overly concerned about the $3,000, I'm confident that to this day I'd still not have written a book proposal. At the very most I'd have written a terrible one. I would not have been as motivated or invested, so I would have been far more likely to procrastinate needed action.

If you don't have much money, surely you can afford to buy a book. How much money and time do you spend on entertainment, clothes, or food? It's a matter of priority.

It's only when you invest in something that you have the motivation to make it happen.

Beyond mentorships, you should invest in education programs, such as online courses and books, and quality products to help you eat and sleep better.

Your level of success can generally be directly measured by your level of investment. If you're not getting the results you want, it's because you haven't invested enough to get those results.

Your No. 1 investment must be yourself.

Who you are determines:

the quality of marriage you'll have

the quality of parent you'll become

the quality of work you'll produce

the level of happiness you'll have.

2. Invest at Least 80 Percent of Your "Off" Time Into Learning

Most people are consumers rather than creators.

They are at work to get their paycheck, not to make a difference.

When left to their own devices, most people consume their time as well. It is only by investing your time that you get a return on that time.

Nearly every second spent on social media is consumed time. You can't have that time back. Rather than making your future better, it actually made your future worse. Just like eating bad food, every consumed moment leaves you worse off. Every invested moment leaves you better off.

Entertainment is all well and good--but only when that entertainment is an investment in your relationships or yourself. You'll know if it was an investment if that entertainment continues to yield returns over and over in your future. That may include positive memories, transformational learning, or deepened relationships.

Still, life isn't purely about being entertained. Education is also key. And although both are essential, education will provide far greater returns in your future.

The world's most successful people are intense learners. They are hard readers. They know that what they know determines how well they see the world. They know that what they know determines the quality of relationships they can have and the quality of work they can do.

If you are constantly consuming junk media, how can you possibly expect to create high-value work? Your input directly translates to your output. Garbage in, garbage out.

3. Don't Work for Money, Work to Learn

"When you are young, work to learn, not to earn." -- Robert Kiyosaki

Just as a large majority of your downtime should be spent learning, so should a great deal of your "working" time.

Wealthy and happy people work to learn. Unsuccessful and unhappy people work primarily for money.

Only 20 percent of your energy should be spent doing your actual work. The rest should be spent learning, improving yourself, and resting.

It is by "sharpening your saw" that you'll continue to become a better and more capable person. Thus, as you dedicate large portions of time to becoming a better thinker, communicator, and better at your craft, the quality of your work will continue to increase. Eventually, you'll be able to charge very, very high fees for your work, because no one else can do it like you.

When you prioritize learning and recovery, then you'll be in a deep flow state during the hours you are actually working. You won't be distracted, like most people are when they work. You're either 100 percent on or 100 percent off. While working, you can get more done in a few hours than most people get done in a number of days.

Your time is spent well because your priorities are clear, you're well-rested, and your mind is stimulated.

4. Don't Learn for Entertainment, Learn to Create More Value

"The key secret to success is not excessive expertise, but the ability to use it. Knowledge is worthless unless it is applied." -- Max Lukominskyi

In our media and information age, there are a million things you could learn. But if you don't put that learning into immediate practice, it becomes shallow information.

Information and knowledge are two very different things.

Knowledge and wisdom are also two very different things.

It takes wisdom to determine what you should learn, why you should learn it, and when you should learn it.

Unless you're invested, you probably won't learn with the intensity needed to maximize that knowledge.

Unless you understand the value of your time, you probably won't have the discernment to ignore almost everything while learning that which will bring the highest return.

When you learn something, you should get a return on that learning. Far too many people read books now just to say they've read lots of books. If you're not applying what you're learning, your consuming and wasting your time.

5. Invest at Least 10 Percent of Your Income Into Vehicles That Will Generate More Money

Very few people create true wealth.

Even those who have high incomes are not truly wealthy. Most people's lifestyles match their incomes. When they make more, they consume more. In fact, most people make money solely to consume.

Very few people make money to invest that money.

It's best to think of your business as only half of your income equation. You have your business which brings income. Then, you have your investment entity to turn your income into even more money.

Like anything, how well you manage your money is determined by how well mentored you are. If you want to become brilliant with money, invest in education and mentoring.

The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The best time to start investing was also in the past. If you haven't started yet, don't sit and wallow in regret. Tomorrow doesn't exist for people who don't do something today.

Start today. Get yourself educated. Create a vehicle, or several vehicles, where you put at least 10 percent of your income. Eventually, your investment vehicle may even start producing more profits for you than your actual business.

Compound interest is a real thing. If you put 10 percent of your income into your investments over a long enough period of time, you'll be set. Unlike the majority of high earners out there, you'll be able to stop working whenever you want, because your money is making more than enough for you to comfortably live on.

6. Shift Your Motivation From Getting to Giving

"The world gives to the givers and takes from the takers." -- Joe Polish

Most people are only focused on what they can get out of life.

Me, me, me.

However, once you become more consciously awake to the world, your desire will shift from merely receiving to giving.

You'll realize that it's actually far more satisfying to give than to get. Moreover, you'll be driven by a cause you fully believe in.

When your motivation is to give, you'll often get insights about how you can improve your relationships. Random thoughts will pop into you head to send "Thank you" notes to various people.

You'll have more ideas about how you can improve other people's lives and businesses.

You'll start contributing more, which will lead to far more opportunities and deeper relationships. People will come to love and trust you. Your work will be motivated by a higher cause, and thus will be far more inspired and impactful.

7. Openly Acknowledge How Dependent You Are on Other People

Just because your primary motivation is to give doesn't mean you don't also seek a lot of help.

Actually, you are constantly seeking and receiving help.

The truth is, everyone is highly dependent on other people to do what they do. But it takes wisdom and humility to openly acknowledge that dependence. Rather than seeing it as a weakness, realize that it's a strength.

Beyond acknowledging your dependence, constantly express your appreciation to the people in your life. That which you appreciate, appreciates. Relationships are assets that can and should grow bigger and better over time.

If you don't appreciate and give to your relationships, your relationships will suffer. All relationships are like bank accounts, and if one person is constantly depositing and the other person is constantly withdrawing, eventually all of the resources become depleted.

In such relationships, 1+1 = less than 2.

Conversely, in synergistic and healthy relationships, 1+1 = far more than 2. When two people are continually giving and receiving, the relational bank account continues to grow and expand, providing several intended and unintended benefits.

For example, I was recently at the gym with my brother. At the beginning of the workout, he was struggling mentally. He wasn't adding to my energy and helping my workout become better than if I was alone. Instead, he was sucking my energy and causing me to exert more energy and effort than if I was alone.

I made him aware of what was happening, and he immediately shifted his emotional posture. He realized how dramatically his mood was affecting me. His motivation shifted from consuming an experience to creating something great.

Our shared mental state heightened, taking us into group flow. Our workout become far superior to anything I could create on my own. Not only that, but we began to engage in inspired conversation. This led to brilliant insights and connections that were relevant to the book I'm writing.

The amazing workout was the intended outcome of our synergy. The insights for my book were unintended benefits. This can only happen when both parties are actively giving and receiving from the relationship. Where both are focusing on creating rather than consuming. Where both have the primary motivation of helping the other person succeed.

8. Create Win-Win Strategic Partnerships to Achieve 10X or 100X Goals

"All failed companies are the same: They failed to escape competition." -- Peter Thiel

Most people are in a state of competition rather than collaboration.

Collaboration is a much higher level than competition.

Competition is focused on the self. It's also very low-level thinking, because what you can do on your own is very limited.

People who are competing are grinding. They're more focused on winning than creating real solutions.

However, when your thinking becomes expanded, you realize you could do so much more with other people. Collaboration creates unique connections working by yourself never could.

You have skills and knowledge that are awesome in your field. There are other people in different fields who have skills and knowledge completely outside of your current awareness. These people also have assets you don't have.

If you want to get 10X or 100X the results of other people in your field, you need to develop strategic "win-win" partnerships. This generally happens when you devise a plan where your skill sets and assets merge with the skill sets and assets of someone else.

What you can do well, someone else may struggle with. What you struggle with, others can do extremely well.

Who can you partner with that could speed your process?

Who has assets and resources you don't?

How could you help these people?

What types of partnerships could you develop that would allow you to more quickly achieve your goals and help them more quickly achieve theirs?

When you collaborate with other people, 1+1 = more than two. The whole becomes different from the sum of its parts.

This is how transformation occurs. Only those who engage in collaboration actually experience true transformation. People who only work well by themselves are stuck in their own narrow worldview and agendas.

When you merge with others, your ideas and goals change. They become bigger and better. They become different from what you could ever create on your own.

The only way to have these types of partnerships is to think long term. You must be invested and have skin in the game. It can't be transactional. It's can't be this for that. It must be about something a lot deeper. When it is, you'll have far more integrity in the work you do. You'll express greater appreciation. You'll consistently do the right thing, even if that right thing is difficult and uncomfortable.

Don't seek transactional relationships. Only seek long-term transformational relationships.

9. Set 10X Goals and Face Your Fears

Look at your current goals.

Why is that your metric for "success"?

Why is that your target?

What would happen if, in all seriousness, you 10X'd that target?

What if, rather than earning $3,000 a month, you pursued $30,000 a month?

Is that even possible?

Of course it's possible. There are several people doing it.

The only difference between them and you is their education, relationships, and strategy.

When you set a 10X goal, you're required to think very differently about your daily behaviors. You're required to be more serious in all aspects of your life. You're required to eliminate limiting thinking and consumptive distractions.

Setting a 10X goal will be one of the best things you've ever done for yourself. This goal should be created while you are in a peak state. You get into a peak state by doing something powerful, whether that be exercising, learning, or being in a unique environment, such as a foreign country. You can even get into a peak state by being around certain types of people, the ones who inspire you to be the best version of yourself.

Only you know what gets you into a peak and passionate state. So, do whatever it is that gets you there, and then write down your goals. Declare what you're going to do. Then write that goal down and visualize its achievement every single day until it becomes your reality.

When you think about this goal, don't deviate from the natural flow of ideas that follow.

You can't 10X your results by engaging in the same thinking and behaviors you're currently performing. Consequently, while thinking about your goal, you'll also get ideas about what you need to do, realistically, to achieve that goal.

Chances are, you don't know what you don't know. So you'll need to start really educating yourself about how you could conceivably achieve your goal. You'll need to get bolder about the work you're doing. You'll need to create more, and fail more. Over and over, in fact. Quantity is often the fastest path to quality.

Not only that, but when you think about your 10X goal, you'll probably have ideas that scare you. When you do work that scares you, you cross a boundary that most people never cross. Scary work is often highly profitable and valuable work.

10. Get Really, Really Good at Marketing

Marketing is nothing more than applied psychology.

It's about connecting with people, persuading them, and helping them.

Many people think marketing is a nasty or immoral thing.

Many "artists" don't learn marketing because they don't want to "sell out." They want their work to be pure.

Academics are not better. Their work is not accessible to the common man.

Marketing is nothing more than making your work easier to find and use.

People aren't magically going to appear and buy your stuff.

People aren't going to magically appear and read your stuff.

Even right now: How did you land on this page? Look at the title of this article. I could have just as easily called it "Advice for Becoming Successful."

But would you have clicked on that article?

Probably not.

But you clicked on this one.

Why did you click on this one?

How did you get this far down?

Think about the experience.

Marketing is the "how" to whatever it is you do.

The reason most people aren't successful is because they either fear or avoid marketing. For the same reason, most people are bad teachers. They're more focused on content than the delivery and design of that content.

But the delivery -- the how -- is just as important, if not more important, than what you're doing or why you're doing it.

You could have the cure for cancer. But if you don't market it well, you'll never get your cure out there.

You could have the world's most important message, or greatest story, but no one will see it if you don't promote and package it intelligently.

11. Don't Focus on Time and Effort, Focus on Results Instead

Dan Sullivan, founder of the exclusive entrepreneurial coaching platform Strategic Coach, distinguishes between those who are in the "Time-and-Effort Economy" with those who are in the "Results Economy."

If you're in the time and effort economy, you are focused on being busy. You actually believe the amount of time and energy you put into something merits praise. Conversely, when you are in the results economy, you are only focused on achieving a specific result.

The bottom line is what matters, and thus, it becomes very important to find the most effective way to get there. This is a key difference between entrepreneurs and employees. As Sullivan says:

Entrepreneurs have crossed "the risk line" from the "Time-and-Effort Economy" to the "Results Economy." For them, there's no guaranteed income, no one writing them a paycheck every two weeks. They live by their ability to generate opportunity by creating value for their clientele. Sometimes, they -- and you -- will put in a lot of time and effort and get no result. Other times, they don't put in much time and effort and get a big result. The focus for entrepreneurs always has to be on results or there's no revenue coming in. If you work for an entrepreneur, guess what! This is true for you, too. Though you probably have a guaranteed income, it's important to understand that the business you work in exists inside The Results Economy, even if you're sheltered somewhat from seeing that. I say this not to make you feel insecure, but to show you how to succeed in this environment: by maximizing your results while minimizing the time and effort it takes to get them.

Most people don't think in terms of results because their security is in a paycheck. However, when you shift your focus from how little you can do to how much you can do, you change how you work.

You start learning ways to accomplish more faster. You take on greater responsibility. You change your environment. And you also realize just how important sleep and rest are to achieving the highest possible results. Hence, you begin to take more and more time off and rest.

When you dedicate 80 percent of your energy to rest and self-improvement, then you have a lot of fodder and a very sharp saw to use during the time you're actually working.

You're thinking 10X bigger than everyone else. You're operating under short timelines and high pressure. You can tax yourself to extremes while you work because you spend lots and lots of time resting and preparing.

12. Shift Your Environments Regularly

The environments you work in should reflect the work you're doing.

Doing several types of work in the same environment is ineffective. But people do it all the time. They sit in the same seat and mentally shift from one task to another.

A far better approach is to batch your activities and to do those activities in a relevant environment.

For example, when I write a blog post, I work in a quiet library where I have no distractions. Because my environment facilitates quality writing, and because I knew I'd be writing that day, I write a lot. It's easier to write two to five blog posts in one sitting than to try writing one post at a time.

Ari Meisel, author and entrepreneur, batches his activities and alternates his environments to match the work he's doing. On days he is recording podcasts, he goes to a studio and records about five podcast episodes in a single session.

On other days, he spends his whole day in meetings or on calls. He does this work at his friend's apartment because it's a much more engaging environment.

He also does a lot of writing, and does that at the Soho House in New York City, because it's a quiet environment with poor internet connection. The lack of connection stops him from surfing the Web and even using his phone, because he has bad reception.

13. Define "Wealth" and "Success" for Yourself

Success and wealth are not all about money.

There are a lot of people who have money and have little "capital" in the other key areas of their lives.

Money, obviously, is very important. It solves a lot of problems. It speeds processes.

But money is a tool. It's a means to an end. For those engaging in work they truly believe in, money is simply a tool for doing more work.

14. Have a Firm Stand, It Becomes Your Brand

In order to be successful, you must believe in something.

You must have a stand.

All successful people and brands have a clear why. As Simon Sinek explains in his book, Start With Why, people don't buy what you sell, they buy why you sell it.

Apple is a great example. In all of their marketing, they don't explain the technicalities of their products, they define and share their core values. They believe technology should be both easy to use and cool.

If you want to be compelling and interesting, you must truly believe in something. You must have a clear stand. That stand becomes your brand. It becomes your trademark. It becomes how you distinguish yourself from others.

When you have a clear stand and brand, you stand out. You are no longer neutral. You believe in something, and are fighting to make a specific change.

As a result, people will either love you or hate you. That's what you want. Lukewarm means you have nothing to say. Lukewarm means you're trying to appeal to everyone.

The riches are in the niches. Your niche is your audience. They are a small group of people who agree with the stand you're trying to make. They are your evangelists.

If you try to appeal to everyone, your message, marketing, and products will be terrible. You won't be clear on your why, and neither will anyone else. Thus, you'll be average like everyone else and your work won't stand out.

Only people with firm stands get really, really good at marketing. They care enough about their message to get it out there. They realize that the how is just as important as the whatand why.

Conclusion

Are you doing these 14 things?

How aggressively are you doing them?

Do you want to become a multimillionaire?

Are you ready to think and act bigger?

You've got this.

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btglifestyle · 8 years ago

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This weekend past, the freaks and geeks of the world came out in full force to enjoy all of geekdom at FanCon Comic Convention in Cape Town.

The event took place at the Cape Town International Convention Centre (CTICC), and featured a host of activities including comic book stalls, collectables and merchandise, panels with local and international guests, talks, cosplay and more.

It was truly nerdvana, and that’s why (obviously) the BTG Lifestyle crew were out in full force, exploring what South Africa’s own Comic Con had to offer. Enjoy some highlights from the squad below…

Jamie

After having the full weekend experience last year, I decided to approach this year slightly differently and only attend the Saturday.

I also decided to cosplay this year and went as Josie, the lead singer of Josie and the Pussycats, largely based on the cover of Josie and the Pussycats #2 (2016). In keeping up with our theme, I was also joined by two other Riverdale characters, namely Cheryl Blossom and Betty Cooper.

There was so much to do at FanCon this year that it was great that they moved it to a bigger venue at the CTICC – from various panels on women’s representation in comics to cosplay workshops, to dozens of stands filled with comics and collectables (my favourite purchase this year was a Death Note pocket watch/necklace which I am obsessed with now).

There was something for everyone and it literally took all of my willpower not to buy everything in sight, but somehow I managed to get through with very little damage to my card.

Like at the inaugural FanCon, I had an absolute blast at the convention. It’s always so great to walk around and see so many people with shared interests come together to have lots of fun, and even more wonderful to see so many people seated around the CTICC reading comics and cosplaying in a safe, welcoming environment.

And the cosplay! Although I missed the main parade, some of the costumes I passed were amazing and I am in awe of everyone’s dedication and creativity – my favourite had to be Star-Lord and Gamora (followed closely by the Starburns I saw on my way out). All in all a wonderful experience, and I cannot wait to attend again next year!

Stephen

I’m not gonna lie, when I walked in I was expecting the floor space to be much bigger. This was a result of attending EGE last year, which was in the main hall at the CTICC. I mean, there’s enough crossover with these two events to have some expectation, right? However, Decorex was taking place there.

Regardless, I was not disappointed by Fancon. I quickly found myself milling through the aisles of stalls as I searched for items I fancied; adding them to my mental inventory and doing calculations as to what I would be able to get at the end of the day.

One of my favourite things by far was meeting and taking pictures of (and with) the awesome cosplayers walking around the place. Using my GoPro, I soon found out that I had to inform my subjects that I was in fact not taking pictures of their crotch, but that the camera has a wide angle lens, hence the awkward positioning. Good thing nobody punched me in the face. Here’s a collection of some of the coolest cosplays I spotted on Saturday…

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Another thing I was super excited for was finally getting my picture taken on the iron throne from Game of Thrones. If anyone knows me, they’ll tell you I’m a bit more than a huge fan of the show. Last year I didn’t make it to FanCon, so this year when I walked in, one of the first things I did was photograph myself upon the most glorious iron throne. Much excite!

Activities aside, I was now focused on acquiring some merch. I didn’t get many comic books this year, since most of my collection of reading material is now digital, consumed on my tablet or Kindle (for shame!). I did however manage to pick up some cool merchandise, including an Optimus Prime money bank bust. It looks frikken awesome, as you can see below…

But that’s not the best part. It… TALKS! Yes, it frikken talks! I was super excited when I found out. And the best part is that I got this at a superbly discounted price (but I won’t kiss and tell).

My contribution to the local comic scene was picking up a preview of a self-published comic written by a friend of mine who I attended university with. It’s called Blenderboy, and it’s written by Jayson Geland (my university buddy) and illustrated by his colleague and friend Warren Raysdorf. It’s a pretty crazy concept, featuring a post-apocalyptic world where people have blenders on their heads. You should definitely check it out.

Other notable achievements unlocked at this event was via the purchase of a Spiderman print by Inks MD, which I’ve just mounted on my bedroom wall. I would have loved to walk away from FanCon more broke than I did, but a lot of the merch was not priced favourably in comparison to other sources. Overall, I was super excited to attend FanCon, and next time I may just get a full weekend pass and attend more of the talks and panels.

Dean

I am a geek. So naturally when self-proclaimed “geek heaven” rolls into my town I am going to show my face and geek out with the best of them. This was the first time attending a Fancon although I did go to Free Comic Book Day before. The geekdom was strong back then and I was anticipating the same for this past weekend. I also had to tell myself that I absolutely could not spend as much money as I did the last time. But more on that later.

I was a little surprised that the event was held in the upstairs ballroom area and not the bigger, main expo hall – although another event was taking place there and perhaps FanCon couldn’t fill the entire expo – which understandably is not easy. But when I entered FanCon I was still impressed with what I had seen. Everything from the artwork to the cosplay to the merchandise to the comic books. The entire place was buzzing from the moment I walked in.

I got out my camera and walked around pretty much stalking some cosplayers. I donned my Black Panther mask and Deadpool t-shirt and got so much love from my fellow Deadpools. One told me he liked my t-shirt so much that he was going to kill me later and take it from me. Every time I walked past him he would remind me that he still has to kill me later.

Another Deadpool – in full costume – took a pic with me and let me pretend to stab him in the head. Suddenly I’m craving chimichangas.

I took a seat on the Iron Throne and it was surprisingly comfortable. I had to wait behind some other attendees, including one very ominous looking individual.

But the biggest battle of the day was how much money I was going to spend. I regrettably spent way more than I should have at Free Comic Book Day – scratch that, I regret nothing – but I am a sensible human being who approaches broke status several weeks before pay day. FanCon was not going to help. I bought a Batman mug which is now the fourth in my collection. Yep, definitely a geek. I also did my part for local comics by purchasing a signed copy of “Rebirth” a vampire story around Jan van Riebeeck.

My final purchase was a Deadpool chain of course but I flirted with the idea of getting a silver Batman ring (seriously I walked past the stand like 12 times) and don’t get me started on this Reservoir Dogs poster that would have set me back R1000. Yep, I would have seriously hated myself if I bought that. It would look really good next to my Pulp Fiction poster though. *Sigh*

Overall, FanCon was pretty epic. I would have liked to have gone for all three days and see some of the talks and panel discussions but there’s always next time! I cannot wait.

Editor’s Note: Hey FanCon, how about you hook us up with media passes next time, mkay? 😛

You can follow us on Twitter @btglifestyle and click here and LIKE us on Facebook. Subscribe to the BTG Lifestyle blog for updates, and email us at [email protected] if you have feedback, or would like to collaborate with us.

The BTG Squad Does #Fancon Comic Con in Cape Town! Enjoy :) #FanCon2017 This weekend past, the freaks and geeks of the world came out in full force to enjoy all of geekdom at FanCon Comic Convention in Cape Town.

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