#it's hard to find livestreams as well

[2bluetwo85]

I love how it's basically impossible to watch past F2, F3, or F4 races

[71kedi-yip]

"Probably a lot of people whom don't care for either ship but dislike mcyt/dnf picked 10th/Rose."

I grumble to myself, like I did not do the same thing for the kpop ships.

AO3 Top Relationships Bracket- Round 2 Side 2

This poll is a celebration of fandom history; we're aware that there are certain issues with many of the listed pairings and sources, but they are a part of that history. Please do not take this as an endorsement, and refrain from harassment.

[checkeredflagggs]

Three Hearts Left

Pairing: max verstappen x fem!gamer!reader

summary: fans (and friends) are shocked when they find max is married and to who

a/n: I’m only a casual gamer so take it with a grain of salt

a/n 2: sorry it’s a really late - the weather hates me personally (it is actually September and doesn’t need to be 85* 😡) and it drained my creativity also I got hella sick so 🤷🏻‍♀️

a/n 3: I know I use the name Twitter when talking about that site. I’ll stop deadnaming it when musk rat does too

a/n 4: still not feeling 100% but I wanted to get this out for max’s bday!!

catpawsgaming

Welcome to the CatTree with the paw prints 🐾 ! I’m just a cat 🐈 mom Lady��� who loves the gaming but not the camera 📷. I’ve been playing games all my life and have been streaming for 3 years — as a hobby, not a full time job. I love my 2 cats, my handsome man, and you 🫵 all my lovely fans. You most definitely make all this worthwhile so mwah mwah 💋💋 (video)

catpawsgaming

liked by user, user, user, and 6,583,455 others

catpawsgaming: here we go! Baldur’s Gate 3 has been highly highly requested — so I bought it! …yesterday and forgot about it cause curse of capitalism I still have my day job 😭 but away we go!

As always, if you didn’t manage to catch my livestream it’ll be on my page and I’ll be uploading it to my YouTube channel tomorrow! My YouTube will have the 3 usual versions (one unedited with my reactions, one with just the game play, and one with no sound at all but with closed captions)

Next stream date and game tbh announced but will probably be this Sunday with Animal Crossing (fingers crossed 🤞🤞 I finally get a good turnip price 😭😭 Daisy Mae hasn’t been kind to me lately…)

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user1: guuuurrrrrrrllll it’s about time you got bg3! We been waiting

↳ catpawsgaming: definitely worth the wait though! I had so much fun and it was so hard to stop for the night

↳ user2: for sure it was 🤣 your reactions to shadowheart and astarion were hilarious

↳ catpawsgaming: they clocked my type on point

user3: glad we convinced you to become a bard! You’ll rock it 💙

↳ catpawsgaming: ok but this the closest you will get me to actually performing so enjoy it while it lasts

↳ user3: not gonna sing along?

↳ catpawsgaming: 🤣🤣🤣 🫵 🤡

↳ catpawsgaming: absolutely not.

↳ catpawsgaming: also handsome just bust out laughing at the thought of me singing so…🙄🙄🙄 he’s lucky I love him

↳ handsome: I am very lucky liefje

↳ user3: ahhhh we were so close to her singing but also awwww cause handsome is here!!

handsome: liefje this was amazing

↳ catpawsgaming: thank you 🥰🥰

↳ catpawsgaming: but also you were laughing at me the entire night so…

↳ catpawsgaming: not sure how much I believe you

↳ handsome: well I didn’t say it was good…

↳ catpawsgaming: 🤨😒😔😢

↳ handsome: 🥰🥰🥰

user4: oh to have a man that will spend hours with you doing separate hobbies together…

↳ catpawsgaming: gotta admit it’s the dream

↳ handsome: you’re the dream liefje

↳ user4: ok there handsome, no need to get sappy here on MY comment thread

Private Messages

mv1updates

liked by user, user, user, and 2,833,736 others

mv1updates: Max was streaming today! Just a short one but highly entertaining. Jimmy (or Sassy? I’m honestly baffled and for the life of me can’t tell them apart 😢) caused a small disturbance in the middle of his stream then slept the rest away in Max’s lap 😍

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user5: that was sooooo adorable!! Love seeing more cat dad Max

↳ user6: same! And don’t feel bad admin - I can’t tell them apart either

user7: to be Jimmy…🥵

↳ user8: right? What I wouldn’t give to be sleeping away in his lap…

↳ user9: blessed be. His damn thighs man 😳

user10: ok but am I the only one that heard a female voice in the background?

↳ user11: I THOUGHT I WAS GOING INSANE?? Like there was definitely someone there

↳ user12: wait when?

↳ user10: when max turned the camera to show jimmy on top

Private Messages

catpawsgaming

liked by user, user, user, and 5,822,944 others

catpawsgaming: and Daisy Mae delivered this week! Sunday I got a price of 90 and today!! Selling price of turnips is 658 this evening!! Woohoo!

I've got my usual set up going to allow visitors to sell and I’ll be playing for about 4 or 5 hours so let’s make some cash today! I just ask you be respectful of my island.

As always, if you didn’t manage to catch my livestream it’ll be on my page and I’ll be uploading it to my YouTube channel tomorrow! My YouTube will have the 3 usual versions (one unedited with my reactions, one with just the game play, and one with no sound at all but with closed captions)

My week is looking pretty busy (a lot of traveling happening) so my next stream will probably be sometime next week and I’ll be playing Horizon: Zero Dawn! Its sequel will be coming out soon and I want to replay the first to refamiliarize myself with the game!

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user13: yeessssss! I’ve been holding out that someone would have some fantastic selling prices this week! New house upgrade here I come!

↳ user14: oh don’t I know it! It’s been a downward slump all week for me — the high was 105 😭😭

↳ user13: ouch 🤕

user15: did anyone else hear the cat meowing in the background!

↳ user16: yes! Catpaws has got a couple of cats — they’re almost never on stream (they don’t like staying in one place for long) but catpaws got them right before they started streaming!

↳ catpawsgaming: 2 of them! They’re my babies! 🐈🐈

↳ user15: awwwww 😍😍

user17: can I say something? Is this a safe place?

↳ user18: it is not but say it anyway

↳ user17: it totally looks like she’s got a wedding ring on in the beginning of this stream

↳ user18: nurse! She’s out again

↳ user19: no no no let her cook. I totally thought the same. It was literally just a glimpse but I swear that she had a ring on

↳ user17: thank you! I knew I wasn’t crazy

↳ user19: but! That does mean our catpaws is married!!!!!

↳ user17: 😱

↳ user18: 😱

↳ user19: 😱

↳ catpawsgaming: 😉

↳ handsome: 💙

↳ user17: WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?!? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?!?

catpawsupdates

liked by user, user, user, and 3,126,918 others

catpawsupdates: we’ve had a couple of requests lately asking about catpawsgaming and her cats! These are the first and last photo we’ve gotten — she’s incredibly secretive about them so we don’t know if this is the same cat in both photos or if she has 2 bengals (peep also handsome in the first photo. Catpaws was laughing when she posted that photo cause she’s usually the passenger princess)

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user20: I LOVE THEM

↳ user21: same! Insert that meme. “I’ve only had them for a day but if anything happened to them I kill everyone else then myself”

↳ user22: extreme but agreeable.

user23: that’s sassy - I’d bet money on it

↳ user24: sassy? What? Who?

↳ user23: sassy verstappen! F1 world champion max verstappen’s cat

↳ user24: ummm? This is a page for a small time gamer catpawsgaming

↳ user23: listen. Torture couldn’t get me to admit how long I’ve spent staring at pictures and videos of jimmy and sassy. But that is absolutely sassy!

↳ user17: I’m connecting the dots as I type

↳ user18: you’re not connecting shit

↳ user17: CONNECTING THE DOTS AS I TYPE

Private Messages

Twitter

Private Messages

catpawsgaming

liked by user, user, user, and 3,712,222 others

catpawsgaming: tonight’s stream is gonna be a little late — I’m currently being held hostage by the cutest kidnapper ever

view all comments

user24: awwww

user25: your right. You simply can’t move!

↳ catpawsgaming: completely pinned down!

↳ user25: I don’t think anyone is gonna have a problem with your steam being late tonight

↳ user26: I’ve spoken to the council and we don’t! In fact we all vote for a stream of literally just the cat

↳ catpawsgaming:…you know that is an idea

↳ user26: omg. OMG. OH MY GOD!!

user23: THATS JIMMY!! I SWEAR ON MY LIFE

↳ user27: ok grandma. Let’s get you back to bed

handsome: so that’s where the little troublemaker is

↳ user28: omg hi handsome! Where’ve you been?

↳ catpawsgaming: ok I love all my fans but plz stop flirting with my man

↳ user28: can I flirt with you instead?

↳ catpawsgaming: 😳

↳ handsome: no

Private Messages

Twitter

user29: ITS MAX VERSTAPPEN AND CATPAWSGAMING!!!! I TOLD YOU ALL

↳ user30: ok but are we really gonna take a gossip page as the truth?

user31: OH MY GOD THAT CRAZY FAN WAS RIGHT?!?

↳ catpawsgamingfan: I TOLD YOU. I TOLD YOOOOUUUUU

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maxverstappen1

liked by danielricciardo, charles_leclerc, landonorris, and 8,345,765 others

tagged: yourusername

maxverstappen1: liefje I know this is not how we wanted to share our love with the world but a light in the darkness is now I get to talk about how much I love you and how you are the best thing that has ever happened to me. These past 5 years have been a dream come true — and it’s been a dream I never knew I had. Seeing you that first time, you took my breath away. Forget the trophies and the victories, the world championships and titles I’ve won — becoming your husband has topped every single one of them. I can’t imagine my life without you anymore and I wouldn’t ever want to

comments have been restricted on this post

yourusername: oh my handsome man…you are the light of my life, the moon in my night, the stars in the sky, the best husband ever and the most loving cat dad I could have ever wanted to spend my life with. Thank you thank you thank you for picking me and staying with me and fighting for me and with me 💋💋

[0omillo0]

HAN X READER — JEALOUSY

angst, happy ending

synopsis: During Han’s tour, jealousy and misunderstandings strain his relationship with Y/N.

˚୨୧⋆｡♡˚⋆

You curled up in bed, pulling the covers tighter around your shoulders as the concert livestream played on your laptop. The screen glowed with bright lights and the screams of fans, their adoration for Han filling the room. Your heart swelled with pride as he stood on stage, pouring his soul into the performance. He looked electrified, alive in a way only music could make him.

Y/N: Knock ’em dead tonight! I’m so proud of you! I’ll be watching 💜

A second later, his reply came through.

Han: Thanks, babe. Thinking of you. Wish you could be here 😔

You smiled, feeling that pang of missing him mixed with gratitude. Watching him perform was almost enough to fill the space he’d left behind — almost.

The next song started, and you watched with a proud, content smile until something made your heart dip. The camera panned, catching Han as he made his way down the stage, engaging with fans along the barricades. He leaned close, flashing that signature smile that you knew all too well. And then, with one fan near the front row, he took her hand. He lingered, his expression soft as he chatted with her, giving her that devoted look he often gave you. Your stomach tightened.

The minutes stretched on, and you couldn’t shake the hollow feeling that had crept in. You told yourself that it was just fan service, that it was part of his job, but your mind refused to quiet. Why was he lingering so long? Why did it feel like more than just a quick interaction?

Before you could fully process it, your breathing had turned shallow, chest feeling like it was caving in. Panic coiled in your stomach, and your hands trembled as you clutched your phone. You needed to talk to someone, anyone. You thought for a while and after the show, you dialed Felix.

The phone barely rang before he answered.

Felix: “Y/N? Hey, what’s up?”

Your voice came out in shaky breaths, words stumbling over each other. “I—I’m sorry to call so late, I just… I’m freaking out.”

Felix: “Hey, hey, slow down. It’s okay, I’m here. What happened?”

You took a deep breath, struggling to find the words. “Han was… he was holding hands with a fan at the concert. I know it’s dumb, but… it just got to me. They looked so close.”

Felix: “Y/N… I get it, I do. You know he loves you, right? He’s just trying to connect with fans.”

Y/N: “I know, but… it hurt, Felix. He looked so… sincere.”

Felix: “I know it’s hard, but he’s doing it for the fans, not to hurt you. Just breathe, okay? You’re allowed to feel this way, but remember, his connection with you is real. You’re the one he calls every night, not anyone else.”

You exhaled shakily, feeling the tension start to ease. “Thanks, Felix. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

Felix: “Anytime, Y/N. You don’t have to go through this alone, you know?”

As you hung up, a small part of you felt reassured, yet doubts lingered. But the comfort Felix provided was something to hold on to, at least for tonight.

Hours later, halfway across the world, Han stood in a quiet backstage hallway, trying to clear his head when he overheard his name. He stopped, listening as your voice, faint but unmistakable, carried through the phone. And then he heard Felix’s voice, soft and reassuring, comforting you. It stung — why hadn’t you come to him first?

When he finally got back to his hotel room, he saw your messages but didn’t open them right away. His thoughts swirled with emotions, jealousy the loudest among them. He opened his messages and began typing, fingers moving faster than his mind.

Han: Why did you go to Felix with this?

You replied almost instantly.

Y/N: I had a panic attack, Han. I didn’t know who else to call.

Han: But you could’ve waited. You could’ve… trusted me to handle this.

Y/N: Waited? Han, I needed someone in that moment. You weren’t there, and I was falling apart.

Han: You don’t think it hurts to hear you went to someone else with this?

Y/N: I wasn’t trying to hurt you! I just… I needed someone, and Felix was there.

Han: Well, maybe… maybe it’s better if you just don’t call me while I’m on tour. This is just too much.

Y/N: Han… are you serious right now?

Han: I’ll call you when I can handle this. But please, don’t message me for a while.

The silence that followed felt suffocating. You stared at the screen, disbelief mingling with a deep, piercing pain. With shaking hands, you set your phone down and shut your laptop. The hollow ache turned into an overwhelming emptiness.

Days passed in a blur of missed calls and unread messages. You’d turned off your phone, needing to escape the world that had once felt so full with him in it. Nights blurred into days, loneliness pressing in on you like a weight you couldn’t shake.

Across the world, Han felt every second of your silence, each one heavier than the last. His words replayed in his mind, sharp and unforgiving. He knew he had overreacted, let his jealousy get the best of him, but pride and guilt kept him from reaching out. It was Felix, eventually, who confronted him.

Felix: “You realize what you did, right?”

Han: “Felix, I was upset. I didn’t think—”

Felix: “No, you didn’t think. She called you, desperate, because she needed you. And you told her not to.”

Han ran a hand through his hair, guilt churning in his gut. “I just… I got jealous. She’s close to you, and I…”

Felix: “So you punished her for it. She’s been miserable, Han. Fix this.”

When Han finally gathered the courage, he knew words alone wouldn’t be enough. He wanted to show you how deeply he regretted his actions. He called a florist, ordering 500 roses, each one a silent plea for forgiveness. Alongside them, he sent a letter.

Y/N,

I was wrong. I’m sorry.

I let my own jealousy cloud my judgment and hurt you. You are the most important person in my life, and I can’t bear the thought of pushing you away. No amount of distance can lessen what I feel for you, and I was selfish to let my pride get in the way. Please give me a chance to make this right. I love you, and I’m so sorry for the pain I caused.

Love, Han

When the roses arrived, you stared at them, your heart pounding with a mixture of relief and hesitation. Each petal felt like an apology, each one carrying a whisper of the love you feared was lost.

With trembling fingers, you dialed his number. He answered on the first ring, his voice breathless.

Han: “Y/N…”

The silence stretched, filled with emotions neither of you knew how to express.

Y/N: “I don’t know why you would do that, Han. Why you’d make me feel like… like I didn’t deserve to feel those things. This was the first time I was jealous and I was scared to talk about it. Now I know I can’t do it.”

Han: “ No no no baby, you have to talk about it… I’m so sorry— I know I didn’t react well and I regret every second of it. I was angry… and I didn’t think about what you needed. Only what I felt.”

Y/N: “You really hurt me.”

Han: “I know, and if I could take back those words, I would. I’ll never make you feel that way again, I promise.”

A weight lifted, the ache in your chest easing as you listened to him, his voice full of genuine regret. You felt the love that had always been there, beneath the hurt and distance, waiting for you both to reach it again.

Y/N: “Just… don’t ever do that again. Don’t make me feel like I can’t come to you.”

Han: “I won’t. I swear. I love you, Y/N, and I’ll spend every day showing you that.”

A soft smile crept onto your face as you finally allowed yourself to forgive him. The hurt was real, but so was his love — and so was yours.

taglist

@hannamoon143 @intartaruginha

[suhlogic]

smile for the camera [kmg x fem!oc]

mingyu x camgirl! oc [roommates] 

summary: little did you know mingyu has been a subscriber of your onlyfans account and has a little crush on you. 

warnings: dom!mingyu, sub!fem reader, unprotected sex, choking kink, size kink, cum eating, mingyu’s a bit possessive, corruption kink, slight voyeurism

you and mingyu have been  roommates for a  year now, it was an unexpected thing for you to have a guy roommate but you really had no choice as you were out of living options to live in since the school year was beginning so when you saw mingyu kim's post on twitter through your mutual friend seokmin, you grabbed the chance and thank god he actually agreed to such an arrangement. it honestly helped that you two were in the same social circle as it was less awkward but if it came to your dynamics, you and mingyu simply got closer as the months went by. you've also grown to know that he is organized, knows his household chores, and is a gentleman on top of being 6'2 feet tall, absolutely handsome and ripped due to  consistently working out, and his golden skin that just  looks so dreamy whenever the sunlight seeps through your shared apartment. he was also funny and extroverted which you needed and never failed to always comfort you after a long day. as the days went on, he began to grow on you. but little did he know, whenever he was out for his late night workouts you were actually an onlyfans streamer. you started to stream as a hobby, a side hustle your best friend, karina recommended that you do since you were bored out of your mind and no men were just ever enough for you to be satisfied. plus, it was good money and was raking in what you needed to pay the bills for the shared apartment although you and mingyu split the bills.  

lately, you find yourself growing more attracted to mingyu. you didn't know if it was just the dry spell that was luring you into him like a moth to a flame  or the fact that he was a godsend in your messy life. surely, it couldn't just be purely platonic as he slowly became the guy you constantly fantasized about while touching yourself across your body wishing it was his hands doing all the work instead whenever you'd stream and film content. on the other hand, mingyu knew your little secret. you'd think he was still away for hours on end spending dinner with your other friends after hitting the gym but he was always on the other side of the wall, hearing your moans and screams as he jacked himself off every night longing to feel his huge dick inside you. imagining what it'd be like to have you under his touch like you were being set ablaze only screaming and moaning for him out of sheer pleasure. whenever mingyu would see you walk around in tight shorts and oversized shirts in the morning with no underwear in sight, it'd take all of his patience not to fuck you hard in every spot of your place and it wasn't something you both were strangers to—hell, you were always catching him shirtless and it really was a sight to be gazing at. you just hoped and prayed that your feelings won't prevail and make you do something stupid. 

friday nights began with your usual routine of dressing up in your cutest pink lingerie and doing your makeup as you put on a matching lace mask that resembled a butterfly. after being done, you set up your stream and the vibrator and dildo you were to use later on for your show. "hey guys, how's everyone doing? i hope your week went well," you happily greeted your viewers as they began to enter your livestream.

[clumsypup0697]: hi angel i missed you 

[clumsypup0697]: have you been busy?

[g4m3bo1]: want to see all of you so bad baby

the last comment on your stream made you blush and teased whoever user g4m3bo1 was on the other end of the screen. "aw, you missed me that much gameboy?" you smirk as you began to take off the straps of your bra and began to fondle with your tits. 

[clumsypup0697]: fuck, you're so hot i wish i was doing that to you 

[g4m3bo1]: youre driving me crazy baby 

clumsypup0697 tipped $8

[sebcherries]: need company? i can help😉

as your hands began to travel lower to your wet heat, you moved backward to lay yourself on your pillow to give them a view of your slick pussy and teased yourself with your fingers rubbing your folds and the bud of your clit. your moans became louder as you began to add a third digit inside, eyes closed in euphoria wishing it was mingyu doing such a thing to you. you began to insert your dildo and the sound of coins clinking which meant that the tips began to rake in on your stream. you didn't care if your moans were getting louder or if your hottie of a roommate already arrived. 

sebcherries tipped $20

clumsypup0697 tipped $35

g4mebo1 tipped $40

ho3shi tipped $35

on the other side of the wall, mingyu decided to cancel his friday night plans to go outside. so he just decided to go on his favorite camgirl's stream room who went by her online name— strawberryviolet. he's been a huge fan since stumbling across her channel just purely deciding to jack off his stress away one night. as he watched the girl slide the huge dildo in and out of her tight wetness, he couldn't help but jerk his huge dick off faster thinking how y/n's pussy would feel instead. as the moans got louder on the stream, so did the moans from the other room. he rushed to clean himself up and exit the stream he was watching. but holy fuck, he was met with a sight to behold— his roommate was a camgirl all along, and he was her fan. the difference was that she just had a mask on. 

"holy shit!l" he exclaimed, snapping you out of your pleasure. you quickly turned off your stream and rushed to cover yourself up in front of mingyu, "what the hell are you doing here, gyu?" you asked in frustration. "had nothing better to do but turns out i'm roommates with a cam girl?" he smirks as he leaned against your door. shirtless just wesring his boxers, his huge manhood still definitely erect the way it's almost bulging. "i can explain, please..." you pleaded but he just smiled again. "strip for me," he said with a demanding tone and so you did, baring it all for your roommate you're clearly growing feelings for.  "you're so fucking obedient huh?" he walks over to you as his fingers ghost over your face and lips which sent goosebumps down your spine. mingyu pulled you into a deep kiss with your tongues tied, "gyu, please fuck me..." you begged. "baby, you have no idea how long i've fucking waited..." he says as he picks you up and carries you to your bed, carefully laying you down as he left kisses and hickeys all over your body. "so fuckin' gorgeous, can't believe you're showing this off to the whole world...'s all mine," he whispers as he began to suck on your left boob while fondling the other one with his hand. "been watching your streams for fuckin months now..always would jack off to you every damn night thinking about how i'd fuck my hot roommate," he says  gazing up at you with eyes that had sin painted all over them as he slowly began to kiss you down to your clit, his teasing leaving you on edge. "be patient baby, we got all night." his breath fans against your pussy. he strip your panties off with his teeth and continues to eat you out with his skilled tongue like he craved for you so desperately. his toned forearms and huge hands gripping the back of your thighs securing you in his hold as he began to suck and create random figures on your clit. his pace going faster as your moans got louder, mingyu looked like such a fucking god in between your  thighs.  all you could do was tug on his hair as he ate you out. 

"i'm close baby please...let me cum," you stare at him with puppy eyes as he hovered on top of you to kiss you again. "not yet angel, i need to cum inside you," he says through gritted teeth as he grabbed you by the neck with both his hands to kiss you once more.  mingyu then began to flip you over on all fours without pulling out his dick inside your wet and slick pussy. "so fuckin gorgeous," he slowly buries himself inside you to the hilt and goes slow as his hand has both of your hands gripped against your lower back while the other holds your waist down. you never knew heaven could exist until you felt every inch of him inside you, making sure you're screaming and moaning for him only within the confines of your own bedroom. "gyu, please let me cum, gonna be so good for you..." you whine out as he slaps your butt cheek and squeezes your ass while he thrusts his huge dick inside you. as mingyu begins to pound into you harder and faster, your eyes were rolling to the back of your head in pleasure. he then flips you over into a missionary position and puts your legs over his shoulders and pounds you slowly, the stretch teasing your pussy much more different from earlier. "gyu, please go faster..." you whine, almost running out of words to say while you were fondling with your huge tits as he rubbed your clit with the pad of his thumb. mingyu looks so fucking hot on top of you— you thought,  his short cropped hair driving you insane as his sculpted body glistens like honey due to the sweat, brows furrowed focused on wanting you to reach your high. you grab onto his arms as you felt his thrusts get sloppier and his hand tightening around your neck, just choking you right. you thought mingyu would stop there but immediately takes his dick out of you and dives his head in between your legs and eats you out once more, "want you to cum on my tongue baby, yeah?" he smirks as he begins to lick figure eights on your labia and sucks your clit til you reached your first high.  

as he hovers on top of you, he flashes you a devilish grin and says, "so fucking sweet, just like how i thought" and you put your arms around his neck and pull him in for a long passionate kiss. mingyu inserts his length once again inside you and thrusts at a faster pace repeatedly as you feel him getting sloppy once more inside, "angel, i'm so fucking close...let me cum inside yeah?" he moans as he kisses your neck, sucking on it which would definitely leave a hickey later on. "yes, please daddy...i'm yours.." you moan out and it sends him over the edge as you feel his cum gush inside of you and some of it trickling down your legs. the two of you come down from your high and he lays on the bed beside you for a while and pulls you close against his broad chest wrapping his arms around your naked body, "how long have you known?" you asked looking up at him as your head was laid on his chest while he ran his fingers through your hair, "well, i've been your fan since i almost walked in on you a few months back" he says gently while he smiled at you, flashing his sharp canines that you always adored. the two of you clean up, well mostly mingyu because you could barely walk and drift off into slumber, naked bodies entangled under the sheets yet the thought of him asking you "what are we?" floats in his mind as he closes his eyes. 

[thisisnotthenerd]

picture this: you're a busy working mom whose husband died on the job under mysterious circumstances, leaving you alone to raise your young son in a town with none of your family or support network, at a job that will never pay enough, no matter how much good work you do. your son at once idolizes his father and resents him for leaving, and has channeled all of his energy into solving mysteries without regard for his health or well-being.

you watch him get bullied, watch him get into fights constantly as he searches for his missing babysitter and the other missing girls in town. he wears a nickname given to him by a bully with pride and tries so hard to impress his friends. you see him build up a group of friends, only for them to go to jail. after your apartment is attacked, you go with him to prom to take down his evil vice principal, who killed your husband on an impulse. you devour the dragon who killed your husband and it tastes like hollow victory, like revenge for the man you can't bring back.

the next year, your son goes on spring break with his friends after he gets accosted by an entity that used to work with your husband and some kind of mirror entity that leaves shards in your apartment. you don't hear much from him on the trip until you see a pit fiend choke him out and kill him, on a livestream. your son gives up his worldly possessions for the sake of defeating an entity that was raised for the sake of the status of an elven family.

your son comes back from spring break with the name of an eldritch entity tattooed on his chest and tells you his father died because the being he used to work with put a target on his back. your son met his dead father in heaven after he went to hell as a litigator for his friend. your son has been threatened with death for existing and come back.

that summer, the eldritch entity is summoned out of your son's body, and he spends the entire summer tracking down a cult and sealing the entity once more. you've left your (thankless) job to become a public defender for people like you, getting nothing for years of work, of doing your duty to bring home a little more for your son, and they won't give you your pension.

your son works himself to the bone for his friends, knowing he can't go to a good school unless he somehow ensures they all succeed. he does everything: perfect grades, every extracurricular, running the student government campaign for his friend, and he's still tracking down another missing girl. he gets dominate monster cast on him by the principal despite doing nothing wrong.

you chat with him in the car, driving to school, and he can't afford a moment of rest. people have been killed following the leads he's tracking, he warns you of the danger of following up and yet he still aims to find the clues.

and you wonder, is this all i've shown him? stretching yourself thin, never more than a moment's rest, and yet others don't appreciate it? after spending your lives in this town, and you're still goblins, still punished for the crime of existence, having to work twice as hard for half the credit.

they call him "the ball".

every day sklonda gukgak wakes up.

[faeriekit]

New In Town (dp x dc)

ALRIGHT! 👏🏽 A prompt. (Or, well. A premise.) I’m schtealing a lot of worldbuilding from @mediumsizedpidegon‘s post here so bear with me please.

The Bats, however they catch wind of Amity, catch wind of Amity Park. Of course they do. Amity Park has a very distinct presence— Or, well, a lack of a presence. It may have an abundance of documented weirdness online, from folk stories to abandoned livestreams to concerning details in expats’ online blogs.

But there is no online evidence of Amity Park that leaves Amity Park.

So. What is a family of detectives to do when confronted with the need to gather physical evidence? Road Trip, baby!🏄🏽‍♂️🚗🚞🚡

Everyone hops in the car/Batplane and makes their way to Amity Park; they make hotel reservations, ring up the only reasonably rich enough people to even touch their social circle (the Manson family, and Vlad Masters, apparently), make an itinerary for all the documented tourist stops to hit up while in town off the town website, and prepare themselves for whatever dimensional weirdness is causing a complete tech blackout on the town and an inability to be found by satellite.

They get about ten feet into Amity proper when they meet the first local.

His name is Danny. He’s nice! Affable. He looks a lot like any other Wayne sibling, actually, if a little on the younger side. He notices it’s their first time in town. Do they need any help getting around?

Best way to get information is to ingratiate with a local, so...sure, why not? They get a free tour guide, Danny gets to show off his town; they see all the sights, like the local burger joint, the school, the Manson home, the town hall, the city proper. They’re having a clothing swap in the temple parking lot, actually. You should go check it out!

For whatever reason, it’s all...Punk? Goth? There’s a couple of lolita dressed tossed in, and some crocheted things. Everyone has a trunk out their car, eyeliner, and at least two piercings in their face; everyone here seems to know each other on a personal level. Well, small towns are small towns. Whatever.

Danny isn’t deterred by their reactions. If they want, there’s the movie in park tonight! If not, they can catch dinner, though; their hotel restaurant closes at 8pm sharp. (He just...knows this off the top of his head?)

They split up. Some of the family people watch at the restaurant. Everyone is...weirdly courteous to them. A little standoffish. But not at the Wayne name, just at...them being there.

The people at the park find out they’re watching The Night of the Living Dead. This would be much more normal if the park wasn’t also clearly the cemetery, in the middle of July? Which is. Why? It’s not even for any holiday or special time of the year? It’s just...clearly a movie night in the summer? There are little kids here, playing among the gravestones while their parents set out blankets and snacks. Why is this considered a family event??

Well. At least Jason has fun.

Everyone goes to bed and reconvenes in the morning. When they wake up and roll out for the day, Danny manages to find them again, this time with two new friends, bright and chipper in the morning. There’s a farmer’s market today! Everyone’s worked really hard on this week’s harvest; don’t they want to see?

...Sure?

And the longer they’re in Amity Park, the more they begin to realize how convenient it is, that they’re ferried around so easily; that there’s immediately a local who takes a liking to them, that there’s always something else to do; how suspicious it is that no data can get in or out of Amity now that they’re in it, or how they can’t seem to get close to any of the more suspicious parts of town they want to infiltrate. The town is entirely closed to outside influences. The fashion trends are strange and foreign. They only eat things grown in the area, by people they know, and it’s all sort of...green. Everyone knows everyone. Everyone knows where to go. Who to talk to. The superstitions— make no wishes, step on no cracks, wear no large jewelry, cross no shadows of any person (living or dead, apparently), speak to no one without full view of their eyes. 

But nothing seems dangerous— not until a few of them try to investigate Axiom Labs, a subsidiary of the otherwise national Dalvco company, and are met to the face with a blaster that uses tech they’ve never seen, by a red fighter in an ultra-synthetic suit.

Overnight, the extremely polite and welcoming town becomes a hostile entity to fight their way out of.

[fxrmuladaydreams]

the sensible decision (sv5) (dr3)

pornstar!seb x camgirl/pornstar!reader , pornstar!daniel x camgirl/pornstar!reader

summary: although your heart is split between decisions, your mind finds the sensible one easily

notes: i promised you guys seb was going to have to grovel and grovel he will

prev part next part

You don’t know why you expected to wake up with a clear answer, with an obvious sign that told you who you should choose. You don’t want to look at your phone, afraid of a text from either of them asking about the other.

You do manage to avoid your phone for the most part of the morning. You make your breakfast, shower, get ready for the day, but the nagging in the back of your head is incessant. You groan when you finally do grab your phone and look at your messages.

From Seb

Last night was fun schatz. If you still want to do a livestream together I’d like that

You sigh and text him back.

To Seb

I don’t know if I’ll have the time, I’ve been spending so much time with Daniel lately

Yes, it’s a low blow, but you know it’s what he deserves. You leave your chat with Sebastian and open your chat with Daniel.

From Daniel

How is it possible that you made me miss you after only being gone for a few hours? And that livestream was pure torture sweetheart

You smile at his message, practically giggling.

To Daniel

Well I think the torture is just what you needed after what you did to me in our video

You see him typing, then his message pops up.

From Daniel

I’m pretty sure you asked for it sweetheart

You can practically hear his voice. His Australian accent with a teasing tone, it sends a thrill through you.

To Daniel

Wanna hang out today? I don’t have any plans, and if it’ll make you less lonely I’m willing to sacrifice my time for you 😉

His response is almost immediate.

From Daniel

Sure sweetheart. Come over to mine whenever. And bring a swimsuit

You find a cute bikini that you think Daniel will like and pack a bag for your day. You pack basic pool items, sunscreen, a book, a towel.

You drive over to Daniel’s house once you’re finished getting ready. He greets you at the door in a dark blue sweatshirt and green swim trunks. He gives you a toothy grin as he pulls you inside.

“Hungry?” He asks.

“No, I’m alright, thank you though.” You tell him, but your stomach grumbles in protest.

“I’ll make us some lunch.” He says.

You follow him to his kitchen and take a seat on a stool he’s got at his bar top. You watch as he gathers a few things, from his cupboards and fridge. He asks what kind of sandwich you’d like then gets to work putting it together for you. He passes you a glass of water with your food once he’s finished.

He slides onto the stool next to yours with a sandwich of his own.

You glance around his kitchen. It’s a good size, the bar top you’re sitting at is fairly large with a few seats down to the end. You know his living room is quite big as well.

“So what do you do with all this space? What do I have to do to get on the guest list for all the ragers I’m sure you throw here?” You nudge him with your elbow.

He laughs and shakes his head. “Trust me, there are no ragers.” He takes a sip from his glass. “I want to be able to have people over. I like the idea of being able to hang out, spend time with the people I care about.”

“That’s really nice. I’m sure they appreciate it.” You smile and nod.

He looks down at his lap as if he’s hiding from you. “Well I haven’t really found them yet, so…”

“What do you mean?”

“With our line of work it’s hard to figure out who actually cares about you, and who just wants something from you, you know?” He looks over at you.

You know that feeling all too well. “I do.”

He hums and takes a bite of his sandwich.

You lean closer to him and rest your head on his shoulder. “Well, then I’m happy to be the first one here.”

He smiles softly as his cheeks flush a soft pink.

Once you finish your lunch, Daniel guides you outside to his pool deck. You toss your bag on one of the lounge chairs and pull the dress you’re wearing over your head to reveal your swimsuit.

Daniel can’t take his eyes off of you. Sure he’d seen you in much more compromising positions, but this, with the lack of a camera, felt intimate.

“See something you like Ricciardo?” You ask him, winking.

Oh, two can play at that game. He thinks as he tugs his sweatshirt off, tossing it onto another lounge chair.

You can’t help but stare at his bare torso. The tanned skin becomes taut when he stretches his arms. His swim trunks riding up to reveal a gorgeous tattoo that had been peeking out on his thigh. You notice he’s got tattoos scattered everywhere. Some on his arms, his legs, even his hands.

You have to hold yourself back from stepping forward to run your fingers along the designs.

“See something you like sweetheart?” He smirks.

You scoff and dig around in your bag for your sunscreen. Pulling it out you turn back to Daniel. “Help me put this on?”

He takes the bottle from you and empties pours some into his hand. He massages it into the skin on your back and shoulders. You can feel just how big Daniel is as he stands behind you, practically looming over you. His hands cover a good portion of your back, and his thick fingers fiddle with the flimsy strings holding your bikini together. You remember just what those fingers can do as you let your eyes flutter shut.

He steps away from you once he’s finished, taking his warmth with him.

You finish applying the sunscreen on yourself and lay out on your lounge chair. You pull your book out of your bag and open it with the full intent to read, but you can’t stop yourself from watching Daniel in the pool.

The muscles in his back flex as he does laps around the pool, his arms look deliciously strong. He keeps swimming around and around for a while, before he groans and swims over to the edge of the pool.

“You know, I thought you’d actually end up in the pool with me.” He says.

You sigh. “I’ll sit on the edge, is that enough for you?” You ask giving him a teasing smile.

He lets you get comfortable on the lip of the pool as he stands next to you, looking up at you. The sun sits perfectly behind you, creating a glowing effect, giving you a halo.

“Happy now?” You ask.

He grins as he wraps his arms around your legs and pulls you down into the water. You both end up submerged, you cling to him as you struggle to regain your sense of balance. You gasp when you come up from the water, giving him a smack on the chest.

“What the hell Daniel?” You shout.

He’s laughing too hard to give you an actual response. You can’t tell if he’s got tears running down his face or if it’s just the water dripping from his hair.

“You should’ve seen the look on your face!” He manages to get out in between laughs.

“It’s not funny! I could’ve drowned and died!” You try to pull away from him, crossing your arms over your chest.

He quickly reaches out for you and grabs onto your thighs, easily pulling you up and wrapping them around his waist. Your arms wrap around his neck so you don’t fall backwards.

He bats his eyelashes at you and softly says “I promise I won’t let you drown and die sweetheart.”

You huff and roll your eyes. “Fine, you’re forgiven.”

When your eyes meet his you realize just how close you are. You can see all the little details of his face. The slight bump of his nose, the freckles that decorate his cheeks, the specs of gold in his eyes.

He seems to be doing the same to you, trying to commit your features to memory, then his eyes stop at your lips. He looks like he’s having an internal debate with himself.

“Can I- can I kiss you?” He asks, his eyes trailing back up your face to your eyes.

You don’t answer him, instead you lift a hand to the back of his head and press your lips against his.

[brossession-collection]

Dad's Cam Show (Re-uploaded)

Note: This is a story I wrote in 2020 that was previously deleted by Tumblr. Couldn't find it until I stumbled upon am old hard drive. Hope you enjoy.

--

This social distancing shit is so boring. I get it. It’s needed. But god damn am I running out of things to do. Can’t even meet the guys I’ve been talking to on Grindr. Worse yet is that I’m stuck back at home. I was supposed to graduate college this year! Instead I was slumped over a computer screen in my PJs with my dad making his special pancakes. Ugh. Fuck this shit. I just wish I could go back to a better time.

Whatever. I’m done complaining. Dad’s getting groceries which means I can snoop around his shit. Yeah I’m that bored.

Dad’s a big burly guy. Heading into his mid-forties now and starting to gray up a little, but still keeping his body builder life style. He’s pretty open with me. He told me he used to do cam shows back before livestreams were even a thing. Made sense. Had to show off the bod somehow. Don’t know how mom thought about it but whatever. She’s out of the picture.

His room always had a musky woodsy cologne-y smell. His laundry hamper was even better. I always loved taking his briefs out of there and putting them on myself. I’ve been following his footsteps and bodybuilding myself, but I’m still a ways away before I have an ass and waist as large as his. So his 36in undies droop a bit. I grabbed his black cap too. Man. He loves this thing. Well, plus the 10 others caps he has. He always had it topping his head. Pretty sure he wears it to sleep too. I put it on and flexed like him. I got a bit of a boner but nothing crazy.

His dinosaur of a laptop was open, and logged in. I know I shouldn’t have, but I did it anyways. There were so many folders within folders. So much boring shit… and then I found “cam pics.”

The briefs I was wearing tented and wetted. Fuck I was so scared to open it. But I clicked it and… In there was only one image. I clicked on it to make it bigger and it was my dad. About 13 years ago. He was shirtless, and wearing the same cap that I have on my head right now. My eyes drifted from his hairy arms to his chest to eventually his bearded face. He looked so… tired? There was something about the softness in his expression that really got to me. And then…

“Hey son! I’m home! Could ya help me with the groceries?”

Shit. I got up and scrambled. The briefs were soaked and still being soaked. I had so many windows to close out of. Then I started hearing his footsteps come closer. I panicked and grabbed the top of the laptop to close it, but I couldn’t move. Suddenly, all the windows on the screen started to close. All except for the image of dad I had opened it. It enlarged by itself, and then the laptop started to fucking shake. I tried to get it to stop but it just kept rumbling. Fuck it. I wound up my fist and punched the screen. But there was no impact.

In less than a second my body followed my wrist into the screen. Everything went bright, and I was in a different room. I looked around. It looked like my parents’ room at our old house. The same laptop was in front of me showing the same image as before. Dad’s younger face looking back… And then I saw his eyes move. I froze. I looked at the time. 12:56 turned to 12:57. This wasn’t an image. It was a fucking livestream.

I slowly tilted my head. Dad did the same. I widened my eyes. So did dad. A smile crept over our faces. I just time travelled! And into dad’s body! Fuck there was so much I could do now!

“PING”

A old-school AIM notification popped up on screen. I maneuvered dad’s hand to the mouse and clicked on it. “Hey daddy. You gonna give us a show or what?”

“PING”

“Let’s see those hairy pits man!”

Fuck. I guess dad wasn’t kidding about these cam shows. Shit how do I reply? Do I just say something?

“Uh…” I gulped. Dad’s gruff voice was in my throat. “You guys mean… uh… this?” I lifted and flexed dad’s right arm. Immediately his armpit hair bursted out. Moist and smelly. My nose naturally turned towards the sweaty pit. Holy fuck was it musky. I took a deep whiff and groaned.

“PING. PING. PING. PING.”

“Fuck yeah daddy. Sniff that pit.”

“God damn you’re a big guy. How’s it feel huh?”

It felt amazing being so big. Watching everything I was doing be reflected by my dad on the recording was even better. The cockiness came in.

I wheeled the office chair back and did a double bicep pose. Sweat dripped off his hairy pits. I gave my face a rub and felt his beard scratch against his callused fingers. Then my hands felt the need to go down to his chest. I never felt so much pleasure from nipple rubbing in my life. The pings kept on coming. It was euphoric.

Dad’s cock was tenting the briefs I had put on earlier. I uncaged his 7 incher and let out a whiff of junk musk that filtered into my nose immediately. I started stroking and couldn’t stop. My other hand reached under dad’s taint, through the forest of pubes, and rammed a dildo into my dad’s ass crack.

“PING. PING. PING.”

“Holy fuck this is new! We gonna see a fingering show today!?”

“God damn man you enjoying yourself?”

I was. Everytime Dad’s moans left my throat I felt cock twitch a little bit harder. It just felt so amazing to feel his beefy arms rub against his beefy chest. His toes curling with every electric shock of pleasure moving through his beefy ass and legs.

I shot his load. Let out a gutteral yell. And it didn’t stop coming. My beard was soaked with three shots of cum. Chest was drenched with eight more. At this point, sweat was trickling down my temples. I relished in dad’s orgasm and then relaxed in the chair.

I watched as the notifications went crazy. Dad’s soft eyes housing my consciousness. Ugh. It felt incredible. I glanced over at his hat and felt the need to take it off. I did, and felt a wave of cool relief come off my head. Dad’s hair was cropped short, like a messy crew cut. And it was dripping with sweat. I felt the need to say something.“You like that, men?” Dad had so much suave in voice. The pings accelerated.I smiled and played with my cock. I could feel another round coming but felt a bigger presence unfold. Suddenly dad’s body started to shake. I tried controlling it, but I couldn’t weigh him down. My arms were flailing before my hands grabbed onto the edges of the desk. I whipped my head back, then head-butted the laptop screen. Light filtered through.

I was back at home, in my dad’s loose fitting briefs, his cap nestled on my head. Dad’s footsteps came by, then turned another direction. Guess he wasn’t coming by his room just yet. I looked down at his briefs, now soaked with my cum. Fuck. Was it just a dream?

It must’ve been. Just a fucking horny fever dream. What the fuck ever. Better than what I had been doing up until now. I leaned over to close the laptop but noticed something.

The image had turned into a recording.

[andy-wm]

I’ve just been listening to a podcast about the fabric of reality, and came on here for a bit of downtime. And lo and behold, you’re talking about reality and time passing, and that’s exactly it.

No matter what we think, no matter what we say, or theorise or claim, we don’t alter the truth, and that stands for everything that doesn’t pertain to us.l and our own lives.

I can think the earth is flat till the cows come home (I don’t, obviously) but that doesn’t alter reality. 

Same goes for Jimin and JKs relationship. I’ve seen people claim wild theories, bending and stretching to reach conclusions far outweighing a k drama or blockbuster movie, whereas I personally, think mundanely and simply, that they are together. 

Whose right? We don’t know. 

That’s the truth. We don’t know. 

We may never know, we may find out one day?. 

I’m saying this with a smile on my face because that’s the beauty of life right, as long as we are not harming others, or coming into others spaces and shouting. As long as we aren’t being disrespectful to others, and to Jikooks bond. 

I will say this though, an actual truth people seem to forget or quickly dismiss across the fandom as a whole, is that those men chose to enlist together and whatever we may think of their relationship that is what happened and we should do well to remember that. 

Hey Anon, that's what i call serendipity.

And I love this ask, thank you!

I absolutely agree, what we know - or think we know - has no impact on what truly is.

Even when we believe we know all there is to know, new discoveries and new understanding mean - hopefully - we're constantly learning and reassessing.

When it comes to Jikook, Occam's razor is my go-to: the simplest explanation is, in fact, usually the best. We don't need convoluted plots and schemes and conspiracy theories. There's enough information staring us in the face.

Sometimes we need to untangle that information - I'm not saying we should accept everything on face value - and we do have to look out for new information so we can adjust our understanding.

But that is the case with everything on earth. There is no static knowledge.

These things add layers of richness and complexity but they don't change the basic premise of our underatanding.

That understanding, for me, is that these two humans love each other.

As you say, there ARE things we definitely know, like their companion enlistment.

Like the fact that Jimin chose to have JK with him - next to him - when he talked about his depression on Beyond The Star.

We know Jimin flew 28 hours so he could spend 3 days with JK in NY and Connecticut.

We know that JK was ready to crack Yoongi on the head with a frypan when he though Jimin might have been hurt (by a 5g shuttlecock).

We know that JK never harms Jimin - in all the games and jokes they play, he never targets Jimin (spraying his butt with a watergun is not targeting him, before anyone gets huffy. That did Jimin no harm at all.)

We know that Jimin worried over how hard JK was working.

We know JK begged Jimin shamelessly in front of millions of people, to do a weverse live together.

We know JK watched and hyped all Jimin's footage when he was promoting FACE.

We know they jumped into the comments of one another's livestreams several times last year.

We know all these things, but imagine what we don't know.

There's so much we have no idea about.

Hours and hours of footage that never reaches our screens. Months of time they spend together or alone or with family or friends. That's as it should be - their their private lives are just that - private.

Yes, I have a lot of fun picking apart the little glimpses we get into their lives because i enjoy their dynamic so much and because I'm naturally curious (okay, yes, I'm nosy 🤣).

I look deeper not because I'm hunting for lies or flaws, but because these two delight me. Sure I speculate, but i don't purport to know what they are to each other or where their boundaries lie. And I'm happy not to know. Some things are none of my business.

Like you, Anon, I accept that i may never know the true nature of their relationship, and I'm quite okay with that.

In the end what does it matter?

Whatever they are to each other, they're happy, and honestly what more is there to life than love and happiness?

💜💛

[writershapeholeonthedoor]

Black Widow

Pairing: Florence Pugh × Fem!Reader

Summary: Cooking With Flo is back and you make an accidental cameo that get the entire world to know about your relationship with Florence

Disclaimer: English is not my first language

MASTERLIST

Florence took a step away from her phone to make sure it was recording the way it should, her eyes studying the screen as a smile slowly formed on her lips. It took just a second for the comments to start showing up on the screen fast enough that she barely had time to read one before it disappeared to show other ones. She stayed quiet for a few more seconds to allow more people to start watching the live on her Instagram before she actually started talking.

“Sup, bitches? Here we are with another Cooking With Flo,” she said the famous words she always used to start her lives. She opened her arms as if to show the kitchen behind her and let out her raspy laugh. “Did you guys miss me? It's been a while, I know, but I'm back and this time we're making lasagna.”

For the last five months, she had done none of the livestreams cooking in her kitchen mostly because the space was a mess. The room was being renewed and, on top of that, she barely had time to do anything other than work and make sure people were painting the walls with the right color. But now she finally had time again, so that’s how she ended up standing in the middle of her kitchen on a random Saturday night.

“It's very simple, but it was a requested dish for tonight, so that’s what we're doing,” Florence kept talking, leaning back against the counter with her elbows to read some of the comments the fans were making. She saw a few questions, dozens of hearts, and some country flags, but her eyes quickly picked someone asking if there would be any guests tonight. “No, it’s only me cooking tonight, but I'm not alone.” Florence looked around and easily spotted her dog lying down a few feet from where she was standing. She leaned down to snap her fingers at him, which made him get up and walk towards her while wiggling his tail. Chuckling, Florence picked him up with some effort because he certainly wasn’t a small dog. “Billy's here! Come on, Billy, tell people hi.” The only reaction the dog gave was a low bark before he tried to lick her face. Florence moved away the best she could laughing at the same time. “Oh, God, you're getting too heavy for me to lift you, boy,” she complained and then put the dog back on the floor, where he wasted no time walking away to lie down one more time. Florence put her hands on her waist and smiled widely. “Jeez, guys. Well, let me wash my hands and we can get started.”

Florence had just turned around to go to the sink behind her when she heard a scream piercing through the house.

"AAAAAAAAH!"

The chain reaction was instant. Forgetting about anything else, Florence turned on her feet while yelling back: “Holy fuck! Babe?!”

The live kept going on her phone but the people watching could just glance at her wide eyes and surprised expression before she ran from the frame, the phone completely forgotten. They couldn’t see her anymore, but she didn’t wander far away. Just as she was about to get out of the kitchen and run to where she heard the scream coming from, someone came running from the hallway and almost bumped into her, making her stop.

“Florence!” You screamed again, although this time you were already pressed against her.

Florence instantly put her arms around you while her eyes tried to find the reason why you were yelling. She was trying to find a bruise, a cut, or blood of any type, but there was nothing on you that caught her eyes besides the sheer panic clear in your face. “What is it?!” She asked, though she was having a hard time even keeping standing since you were pushing against her as if you were running away from something. “Babe?!”

You managed to slip past her and go further into the kitchen all while using your hands to keep grabbing Florence’s shoulders as if she was the only thing keeping you safe. “Oh, my God! There's a monster inside the bathroom!”

Upon hearing that, Florence couldn’t help but blink in surprise, tilting her head to the side and trying to understand what you meant by that. “A what?”

It was her sudden change in humor that made you look at Florence with even more urgency. She was too calm, she clearly didn’t understand how grave that was. “It almost killed me!”

Your tone had the opposite effect, though. Florence kept looking at you for a few more seconds before her signature breathless smile cut the silence that had formed between you two. Her shoulders dropped, as did her hands to your waist, and she let her head hang for a moment to bask in the relief she felt for realizing there was no imminent danger as she initially thought there was. If it was anything as bad as you were making it sound, you certainly wouldn’t be acting that dramatically.

Finally, she shook her head and looked up at you again with a smile. “I'm pretty sure there's not a monster inside our bathroom. Haven't you watched Scooby Doo?” Florence joked.

It made you whine, however, because you couldn’t believe she couldn’t see the danger you were in. “Florence,” you complained.

Florence must have noticed you were getting mad for her lack of concern because she just chuckled again and approached you to kiss your cheek. “Okay, babe, I'm going to take a look,” she conceded.

Now more relaxed and with a pout, you nodded and let go of Florence’s shoulders so she could walk away from you. “Take care!” You yelled to her retreating form.

Florence kept walking until she reached the bathroom in the hallway. The door was open and the light was still on, but she poked her head inside first. She saw nothing out of the ordinary, so she decided to ask you again, keeping her voice loud and clear for you to hear her from the kitchen. "Again, I don’t think-” Florence interrupted herself out of a sudden when her eyes finally spotted the thing that had disturbed you. “Oh,” she breathed out.

Inside the kitchen, you were biting on the pad of your thumb as you waited for her. “Do you see it? It's right there by the sink!”

Florence smiled to herself while she saw the little spider weaving her web down peacefully as if there was nothing wrong in the world. “Yeah, I see it,” she replied with amusement clear in her voice.

“Take care!” You exclaimed again, but that was what finally caught the attention of the other occupant of the house. Billy, now alert because of the commotion, got up with his ears pointing up and started to go after his owner to see what was going on, but you quickly leaned down to scoop him from the floor. “Oh, my God, Billy, don't go there!”

“Can you bring me a bowl?” Florence asked.

“What for?” You frowned and moved the big dog a bit when your arms started to get tired. Maybe you should start going to the gym, after all.

Florence’s reply came quickly. “So I can take this little guy outside.”

You gasped in shock. “You wanna touch it?!”

The other woman laughed again. “No, that's what the bowl is for!” You rolled your eyes fondly at her teasing. “Come on, babe.”

You bit your bottom lip and looked around. There were several bowls around the counters that she had put there to put the ingredients while she cooked, but there was no way you would go back to that bathroom again when the life-threatening monster was still there. “I can't get any closer than this.”

“That's okay, I will go get it,” Florence soothed your nerves and, a second later, you heard her coming back to the kitchen.

You couldn’t keep Billy on your lap for longer so you put him down gently, only to have him running to meet Florence, who was just entering the room again. Florence was smiling, although she wasn’t making fun of you - at least yet - and she walked towards you to peck your cheek. It seemed like it was just a gesture to try to hide her smile, but you weren’t going to complain about it.

She had just turned to grab one of the bowls when her eyes caught her cell phone on top of the counter and she immediately stopped in her tracks as her heart dropped to the floor. “Oh.”

You jumped away from the counter like it was catching fire. “What?! There's another one here?!”

Florence’s gaze moved to you for a brief moment though she couldn’t stop looking at the millions of comments and emojis appearing on her screen for too long. “Uh, no.”

You followed her eyes and it was your turn to feel the dread inside. In your panicked state, you forgot Florence was doing a live. You hadn’t just interrupted it, you had walked on it. Literally. You could see yourself standing in the middle of the recording, Florence just a few steps to the side looking like a deer caught in headlights as her eyes kept moving from her phone to you.

People didn’t even know you existed and there you were now. People didn’t know Florence Pugh had a girlfriend. People didn’t know she was only making lasagna tonight because you told her that’s what you were craving.

“Shit,” you mumbled. “Oh, shit. I forgot you were going live.” You took a step back and put your hands on your face to hide the deep blush that took over your cheeks. “Oh, no.”

Noticing you were a step away from going on a full-on panic attack, Florence approached you and gently pulled you closer to her body. She tilted her head to the side to give you the perfect spot to hide your face in the crook of her neck and you took full advantage of that. There was no point in trying to hide now that the cat was out of the bag. People had seen you already, they certainly heard Florence calling you “babe” and saw her kissing your cheek.

You silently reached the same decision in the few seconds you stayed in each other’s embrace. When Florence pulled away, she held your face between her hands and offered you a smile that put you at ease instantly. “Hey, it’s okay. Don’t worry, okay?” She winked at you. “I will be right back, let me just take out the monster for you.”

Florence kissed your forehead before grabbing a bowl and walking back to the bathroom. You thought about stepping away from the camera, maybe going back to hide in your shared room as you usually did when Florence was making content when you were around, but you barely had the time to think about where to go before your girlfriend was back in the kitchen.

“I'm back, folks.” she declared to her phone while walking to put the bowl inside the sink since she couldn’t use it anymore. After that, Florence turned back to face the camera and leaned against the counter with both hands, smiling. “It wasn’t a monster, it was just a little spider,” Florence told to the people watching the live.

Standing beside her, all you could do was mumble: “It was a monster.”

Your reaction dragged another laugh from Florence - the laugh that you loved so much, deep and husky, and that made her nose scrunch in that adorable way that always made you want to kiss her. “Thank God you're dating Black Widow herself, huh?” She nudged you with her shoulder, clearly teasing you.

Affected by her smile and her expressive eyes, you easily forgot there were literally millions of people watching you two at that moment. “I don't think that would be a reason to brag considering you would kill me in the end,” you replied, amused. “Besides, I'm not dating Scarlett.”

Her gasp was so loud that even Billy barked from where he was sitting staring up at you two. “Hey, I just saved you from a terrible monster!” Florence complained, although it was obvious she wasn’t serious. “Show me some love.”

You rolled your eyes again, but the smile on your face couldn’t be ignored. “You're right.” You nodded and leaned over to kiss the tip of her nose. “Thank you, my darling savior.”

Her nose scrunched again and a low chuckle left her lips before she pulled away with a more somber expression. She looked at you as if she was trying to hold a silent conversation and, gladly, you understood what she was asking without saying a word. You only nodded and braced yourself for what was about to come.

Florence returned her attention to her phone and her smile became a more practical one. “Well, I think you guys are a little confused. That's not how I planned for you guys to find out, but that's okay. We're just going to recalculate,” she chuckled politely. “In case you hadn’t realized it since this shenanigans started, this is my girlfriend.” Florence placed her arm around your waist, pulling you closer and smiling contently with her eyes glued on you. It seemed like you couldn’t look away from each other for a while, but she eventually returned her attention to the several comments popping on her screen. “Yes, I kept it a secret until now. And yes, I was intending to keep it under the rug for a while longer, but mostly because I did not want you scaring her away,” she joked since you both knew the reason why your relationship was a secret was because you were both trying to protect your privacy and your love from prying eyes. “She was the one that said she was feeling like eating lasagna tonight, actually,” Florence added.

You nodded, feeling more relaxed to be standing there now. “She got her grandma's recipe, I couldn't resist.”

“Since the cat is out of the bag…” She read a few comments, deciding to answer them as she went. “We've been dating for a while, yes. This is our kitchen, actually.” Florence pointed to something behind her. “Well, it’s still coming together. We still want to make some changes,” she relented since you both know none of you were satisfied with the place the fridge was placed. “Uh, she’s not an actress, if that’s what you want to know, another reason why we didn't say anything about us.” Florence kept from telling her fans what you actually do with your life, trying to maintain any sense of privacy still. “Yes, she knows my family. Guys, I will answer two more questions before we move on. Now that I saved her life and our bathroom, I believe Y/N wanted to take a shower before dinner,” she joked.

You laughed and agreed with several nods, also licking your lips to add to the dramatization. Your attention ended up going to one of the comments that showed up and you decided to answer it. “Billy ran to me at the dog park, that’s how we met,” you explained shyly.

Florence seemed happy that you spoke up, though, and she proved that by leaning closer to kiss your cheek for the third time. She then moved on to pick the last comment she was going to reply to. “No, she’s not going to feature in the next Cooking With Flo unless she wants to. Or unless there’s another teeny tiny spider forcing her to run to me.” She poked your side at the exact spot that she knew would get you squirming away and that’s what happened, of course.

“It wasn’t small,” you argued as your body moved away from her. “I'll go so you can keep filming.” You turned around to leave, but changed your mind last minute, choosing to say: “I'm sorry to crash in.”

“Don't need to apologize, babe,” Florence assured you firmly and, before you knew what was going on, she pulled you in for a quick kiss. “I love you, okay?” She whispered against your lips, making sure no one else could hear it.

“I love you more,” you replied gladly in the same tone before walking away. “See you once you get my food ready!”

Florence laughed while she watched you disappear from her sight and then looked back at her phone to clap her hands once and say: “Well, so let's get started!”

[user211201]

Totally Normal

--- Originally posted on 2023-12-08 by dumb-and-jocked. ---

“Welcome back to Totally Normal, the online show where we narrow down the one thing that makes us all meet that standard!”

The host then hit a button on his laptop, releasing an audio for an uproarious round of applause. With his entire audience streaming in live, he had to make due with tracks. He didn’t mind it though; he could always predict what his viewers were thinking. It was like they shared the same mind.

“My name’s DJ, and before you ask, yes I have a side gig in music.” A laugh track obnoxiously inserted itself. “I don’t dabble in the typical jazz; I remix these men back to the tunes they oughta be singing.”

Another fake round of applause. The host smirked before continuing forward with the rules.

“The point of the game is simple: Figure out that one thing that makes someone totally normal. Through a series of questions, I’m going to chisel away at our contestants until we get to the base. For every wrong answer, a vibration will be sent out to their device until they head back on the right track. We want to find out that one thing that solidifies them as an average joe, but we don't exactly know what that thing is."

The host then took a scripted pause. "Well, *I *know what that thing is.”

Another laugh track entered before the host silenced his imaginary audience. “So, let’s get down to it. We have our men here, but ARE THEY NORMAL?”

The last three words were all enunciated with the typical gameshow pazazz. The host even had an accompanying audio that made it seem like there was an audience chanting it with him.

On cue, the livestream booted up a panel of the three contestants. The first was a shy young man, who by his age looked to be in college but by his height possibly younger. The second was the typical corporate homosexual, the breed who was already happily married and wore tight, designer clothing. And last but not least, the third looked just a little older than the first with an office that displayed the inner workings of a minor start-up.

“Help me welcome our first contestant, coming from the cool waves of Cali, here comes Cody!”

Corey opened his mouth to kindly correct the host, but was immediately silenced by the massive track of applause. A small and nervous 20-year-old, Corey was an academically-fine student at a state school. He worked as an IT intern, helping others work through their issues in a manner where he didn’t have to fully engage. Yet he knew he would probably have to work through this introvert problem if he ever truly wanted to make a loyal boyfriend from the crop of surfers across the street.

“Up next is our cowboy-tootin’, bullet-firin’ family man, Norman!”

Nolan made a face of disgust, but he too didn’t stand a chance against the fake cheers. He’d settled down with his husband just about 10 years ago in the suburbs. Working for a Fortune 500 company, he had everything a man of his caliber could want. Great company, great style, great pets instead of real children. Nolan loved his little metropolitan life.

“And finally, the privileged heir to the corporate throne, it’s Asher!”

Aaron rolled his eyes as the artificial eruption burst through his speakers. He assumed that this narcissistic jock host had gotten all of the contestants names wrong. Aaron had built his own business up from the ground, an independent hard-worker with no one tying him down. It wasn’t that Aaron didn’t want a boyfriend, he just needed to focus on himself. That’s why he was keeping it casual, hooking up with boys a little younger and less responsible. He absentmindedly pawed at his crotch a little as the douchebag DJ started the game.

“Now,” the host cracked his knuckles dramatically. “Let’s start off with some easy questions, just to make sure those devices are working after all. Cody, you’re looking comfortable out on that beach!”

Corey looked around the library he was sitting in confusedly, neither comfortable nor on a beach.

“I think you’re mistaking me for the surfers across the street,” Corey tried to joke, but his feeble demeanor spoiled the comeback.

“Men…you all ought to be where all the other guys of your kind are at.”

All three of them put on bewildered faces.

“Cody, what’s holding you back from embracing that Cali life?” the host asked.

“I…I mean there’s the obvious fact that they aren’t keen on ga-”

BZZT

“Ah!” Corey ripped his hand away, the "vibration" more of a literal sting.

“Cody, what’s holding you back?” the host asked again.

“Dude,” Corey uncharacteristically responded. “I don’t know if they will accept me, man.”

“Bro, what’s there NOT to accept?” the host chuckled. “You fit right in!”

Corey looked over his short frame, his pale skin, his shrimpy figure. He appeared better fit for the library than the bea-

BZZT

“You’re right DJ! I'm a gnarly guy like them brahs! They’ll totally accept me!”

Corey looked over his tall frame, his tanned skin, his toned figure. He appeared better fit for the beach than the library–that’s why he was on the beach after all!

“Alright alright,” the host nodded with approval. “Now Norman, let’s talk about your life in the countryside.”

‪‘Country side’?” Nolan interjected. “Do you consider Houston-”

BZZT

Nolan flung his hand back, “HOWARDWICK the countryside? You bet! Population 402, the two being me and my husband.”

“And what massive land you got behind you, I’m assuming you and your male fling built that together.”

“My what?” Nolan peered behind him, noticing his garden he’d built with his hus-

BZZT

-the ranch he’d built with his hustle. Well, not technically–this land had been managed through the traditional good ole ways of his parents, grandparents, and great-grandparents. He’d just been fixing it up here and there.

Nolan stretched his thickening fingers, hoping to desensitize them from the pain. “W…What in tarnation is goin' on ‘ere?”

The host continued on, mocking the Southern accent he’d implanted onto the second contestant. “A place fittin' for a cowpoke like y’all’s self! Ain’t no city folk allowed; you don’t want nothin’ queer intrudin' your property, right?”

Queer?!” Nolan spat back. “Ain’t nothin’ wrong with bein’-“

BZZT

“Darn tootin’ straight! Ain’t nothin’ strange gonna be happenin’ on this ‘ere land.”

With the second contestant’s location rightfully reoriented, the host moved onto the third.

“And onto our Ivy League, let’s discuss ascension…I mean, ‘climbing the corporate ladder’.”

Aaron shot the host a dirty look through the screen. “You don’t think I worked hard to earn this position?”

“Well, you certainly didn’t do it all yourself.”

Aaron held his breath. He was a decently attractive man with his slim figure and responsible will, and even his anger made him appear wiser than his years. But Aaron's best feature was his independence, and he wasn’t going to let anyone taint his name over that.

“What, do you think my current boyfri-”

BZZT

“-my dating his-”

BZZT

“-my friends with benefits were involved?”

Aaron’s fingers tingled with energy. His body tingled with fury.

“Well,” the host snickered. “If by benefits, you mean…”

“What’s all this!” Aaron flipped. “This is simply…p…preposterous!”

“What are you talking about?” the host egged on. “It's simply normal for a man with your caliber to have such an ‘inheritance’.”

The other two contestants watched on with intrigue.

“I…I may have a b…benefactor,” Aaron suddenly revealed, as if something had just been placed upon his chest. But he was still independent, right? “But that has nothing to do with it!”

“Benefactor? Do you mean your DADDY?”

The fake audience suddenly burst into a chorus of shocked “Ooooohhhh”s. Aaron’s usual calm nature was flatlining, being replaced by a more quickly-agitated behavior.

“We may be really closely acquainted!” Aaron backpedaled. “But it’s nothing of that kind of sort!”

The other two contestants smirked as the growingly-pompous bastard was taken down a peg.

“Sounds pretty queer to me, man,” Corey interjected confidently, scratching at his defining abs.

“Yeah, Ah reckon that fellas a little less normal than us folks,” Nolan added, adjusting the large hat that had secured itself upon his head.

“SHUT UP SWINE!” Aaron spat, his face gaining back a little of his baby fat as he absorbed more child-like aggression. “I'm perfectly normal!”

The two men laughed alongside an obnoxious laughter track.

“He’s right folks, we men are on the right side of history.” The host knew he needed to move on, the show only had so much time of course, but he was having fun. “Surely that father-figure is just some kind of…relative?”

“Just a relative, brah?” Corey asked as his trim cut bloomed out into luscious blond waves.

“Seems closer than that, partner.” Nolan quipped as a graying stubble crawled upon his widening jaw.

“A….A relative?” Aaron stammered, a higher youthful pitch lightening his tenor as this benefactor became clearer in his head. “He’s…he’s someone who I f-“

BZZT

“Father! He’s my father: Asher Osvald the Third!” Aaron screamed, his blond locks gelling up into a refined style that didn’t match his own personality. “And you all better remember it when you see our company in the headlines!”

Both Corey and Nolan took their respectful back-offs, but the host could only smirk with pride. After a moment of self-congratulation, he noticed some slight hesitation from the first candidate.

“Dude…” Corey started. “Can’t you just see he’s messin’ with us, man? Don’t you guys feel kinda strange-“

“Aren’t you supposed to chill, dude?” The host immediately cut him off.

Corey’s mouth went flat, his chin taking the opportunity to curve out a little further. “How can I chill with-“

BZZT

“Without the support from my brosettes across the screen, duuuuude!”

The host watched on with glee as the female portion of the livestream burst into a flurry. Lots of hearts and kisses and even some eggplant emojis were flooding the chat. And the comments were getting suggestive too. One chick wanted to know why he was wearing a dorky button-up, and she was soon exposed to his lean bod and treasure trail. Another suggested he should flex for the camera, and Corey was happy to oblige, each of his muscles pumping larger as he did so.

“Now, Cody,” the host coyly asked. “I’m sure the fans would like to know what you do for work.”

“I uh…I work with coding.”

“You are studying IT?” the host replied, incredulous. “Sounds complicated man.”

Corey beamed at the compliment, an excited fever entering his voice. “Yeah, but I sort of have a gift for-“

BZZT

“IT...like as in ‘it’ man...not ‘eye-tee’ or whatever.”

“But it has something to do with a code, right?”

“Well…yeah man…” Corey’s lifeless vocal fry responded. “But it's not that nerdy crap…something more…uhhh…”

The host graciously provided the answer, “Manly?”

“Yeah man….’it’ is the uh…bro-code brah.” Corey fiddled with the cross necklace that had materialized around his neck, trying to structure his thoughts. Corey felt like his head was spinning in a light vertigo, but not out of stress. Rather, a pleasurable confusion. Cali dudes don’t think that much right? They just go with the flow, so why shouldn’t he man? Wasn’t that what was normal?

While Corey processed his internal dilemma, the host reconnected with the second contestant, noticing he too was becoming a little self-aware.

“Hey Norman, you’re really rocking that fit.”

Nolan was honestly surprised at the comment. He knew he looked good in his tight, patterned three-piece, but he didn’t think the ultra-straight host would notice that too.

“Those shoes must be great for the ranch.”

Nolan laughed. “These ole’ things? They’re Prada from last season-“

BZZT

“Uhh…Ah mean these boots are from that one brand-”

BZZT

“Ah’ve had these kickers for years, fella!”

The host observed quietly as the rest of the second contestant’s clothes altered. The suit jacket and vest disappeared completely. The pants grew out into a straight pair of jeans that had been worn continuously for many seasons. The shirt rolled it sleeves and loosened some buttons, darkening to a dusty black that was meant for hauling hay rather than implying gay. But as the outfit masculinized, there was one item that stubbornly fought back, unlike the man who wore it.

“And that belt, how long have you had that?”

Nolan evaluated the expensive snake leather. “Oh yeah, this ‘ere was a gift-“

BZZT

“What in TARNATION was that for?!” Nolan yelled, the vibration noticeably more painful than the previous blasts. The material of his belt quickly grew cheaper, a massive longhorn buckle blooming forth above his blooming pouch.

“S…Sorry y’all,” Nolan collected himself. “Ah don’t know what’s gotten ovah me, or why Ah’m speakin’ so-“

“Enough apologies,” the host gagged. “You are a man, are you not?”

“Yessiree, but that doesn’t mean we men ain’t got to be sens-”

BZZT

“Ah reckon yer right there, partner!” Nolan puffed out his chest, carrying his emerging muscle gut with him. “We men oughta be tough! The MAN of the household.”

The host snickered, his eyes meandering around the second contestant’s body as additional muscle and bulk was piled onto his frame. “And men like you ought to have a body like that, don’t they?”

The cowboy huffed, his torso heavy with Southern pride. Nolan had worked his muscular frame up over all these long years, from sunrise to sundown. At 6’4, his big hearty body was always devouring meat to stretch out everything from his big strong biceps to his huge Size 15 clompers!

With the first and second contestants almost there, it was time for the host to catch his third man up to speed. He had already advanced mighty far, his skin having cleared up a bit and a few arrogant gold trophies having appeared in the office background, but the host had some additional notches yet to secure before the final round.

“Now Asher, let’s get real here.” The host put on his classic douchebag smile for the audience. “Any ladies tickling that fancy lately?”

“What?” Aaron scoffed. “Are you dense? I'm into g-”

BZZT

“Girls…no…wait what?” Aaron felt strange. Why did the host ask if he liked…girls? And why was the thought of girls suddenly something he…liked?

“Listen ere’, partner,” Nolan suddenly interjected. “Yer talkin’ 'bout women like they’re nothin’!”

The host, displeased, fought back. “Aren’t you married to one, partner?”

Nolan couldn’t believe the disrespect. “Me? Married to a woman? Yeah right-”

BZZT

“-Ah am! Ah’ve been married to my lovely wife for darn straight twenty years! Ain’t nothing QUEER happenin' on this ‘ere normal ranch. I got youngins to raise after all!”

As Nolan became bombarded by memories of his new flock of children, the satisfied host switched back to his third contestant.

“Look, I think we should respect women.” Aaron tried his best to sound mature, now finding it extremely difficult to maintain. “In fact, I think we should respect all others appropriately-“

BZZT

“And by appropriately, I am referring to overlooking these swines of colleagues who cannot afford a top notch education adjacent to my own.”

The host queued up a laugh track for his next one-liner. “They weren’t kidding when they said someone with your prestige had everything handed down to you, including bad manners.”

Aaron felt his anger rising once again, it easily filling his shortening body as he squared out to an average 5’9.

“Well excuseeee me! I am my own person with-“

BZZT

“My father is a reputable man who would wish to-”

BZZT

“DADDY!”

Aaron stomped his foot, bewildered at this idiocracy. Why was he continuously interrupted? Why was he not given the required recognition? He was captain of the country club’s golf team, rowing team, youth league, and the youngest member on the executive board for Christ’s sake! He studied at an Ivy League! He was everything!

As Aaron tried to understand why none of these other men appreciated the absolute honors of his merit–which he refused to ever admit weren’t even his own–a small alarm went off from the host’s computer.

“Like what was that, mannnn?” Corey’s face furrowed into an all-too-natural look of dumbfoundment.

“Yeah,” Nolan reared. “What's y'all gonna do next?”

“I demand to know it this instant!” The host was surprised at the third contestant jumping in, but he assumed it was just his way of trying to maintain his (nonexisting) position on top. “Or else I’ll tell my father about this-!”

An insane uproar of artificial laughter echoed throughout their ears, startling and silencing them.

“Alright folks, you know what that sound means!” the host grinned. “It’s almost time to wrap up our show, and because our contestants still haven’t figured out what makes them 'Totally Normal', we’re going to have to speed things up!”

“But can’t there only be one winner?” Aaron whined.

“Technically, no,” the host responded honestly. “All of you can be winners if you find out what makes you totally normal.”

For the first time since the game had started, all three of the contestants fell silent.

“I mean, let’s look at our surfer stud Cody,” the host started. “You are almost there, but you gotta loosen that one thing that’s still pent-up, man.”

“Brah…” Corey complained. “What else is there?”

As if by some subconscious command from the host, Corey began dumbly palming himself, a light drool dripping from the edge of his lips. The constant cycle of tits and feminine bits in his mind bombarding all over thoughts.

“A totally gnarly surfer focuses on working out, banging chicks, and chillin’ dude.”

Corey guffawed with a stupid relaxed expression, casually groping as the host moved on.

“And Norman, you’ve worked hard for your position in life, haven’t you?”

The Texan father nodded in cold agreement.

“So what would pride a totally traditional cowboy more than his ranch, his woman, and his legacy?”

Nolan groaned as he instantly unbuckled the massive lock hiding his mighty steed. Huffing loudly, the Southern Baptist’s lil’ pony was wrangled into a full-fledged stallion, the kind that was built to produce offspring. And the kind that got worked up over anything that could threaten the generational uniformity his family, religion, and nation he swore to protect.

“And you, Asher,” the host swiped over to the final contestant. “What’s stopping you from becoming the total Harvard bastard?”

Asher’s face went red and his cock went hard.

“I’m talking complete corruption, pure privilege, Daddy’s little-”

The host was suddenly cut off by a loud holler, the exclaim like the crashing waves of the ocean. Immediately, the comment section blew up as the host, players, and audience watched the surfer jock release a blast of his sea salt spray.

But before the host could congratulate the first winner, the southern father turned around the corner. With one hand whipping his meat and the other held tightly onto his hat, it was only mere moments until the inevitable:

“YEEHAW!”

Once again, the audience burst into merriment over the propagating blast. It was then that Aaron’s anger truly took the best of him. He couldn’t be beaten by two no-names! He was the top of his class, an heir to a Fortune 500 company, and a totally normal man for Christ’s sake! Gripping his pecker and shining it furiously, Aaron accepted his heterosexual rage and vowed that he would win and please his…please his…!

“F…FAAAAATHERR!”

A loud, pretentious yell echoed out of the Harvard student, an endless splurge of funds dumping out of his mighty account. It was just one of the many things his heritage’s estate had granted him.

The host didn’t try to hide his devious sneer as the viewers erupted once more. He’d loved his job because everyone won every time. And now, seeing all the new stereotypical straights he’d created, the host couldn’t help but feel his own massive sausage chub. But he laughed the feeling off, knowing beating off over these other men wouldn’t have been “totally normal.”

“And it looks like with just a minute left on the clock, all three of our contestants will be going home as winners today!” The host then added his artificial rounds of applause. “So, did you three ever figure out what makes you ‘Totally Normal’?”

“Isn’t it obvious, brah?” Cody replied, the typical airhead more sure of himself now than when he had dropped out of high school. “It’s that we’re straight, mannnn…”

“He’s right, partner!” Norman added, his fatherly conviction always strong and steady. “Ain’t none of us are them faggots. If Ah do say so myself, we are all what the mighty Lord named men.”

“Well, if that is what common plebians such as yourself are called, then you shall address me as ‘I-V’,” Asher Osvald IV’s voice was doused in entitlement and a lack of understanding for anyone but himself. A pair of offscreen hands adjusted his tie just to prove his privilege. “After all, I do attend Harvard. I guess you could say I was destined for greatness since birth.”

“Yes, Asher, everyone here knows you are a prick.” The host immediately followed up his quip with a laugh track. “But that’s all we have for today’s show. Signing off, this is Host DJ!”

“Hang ten and surfs up, dudes!”

“The biggest rodeo’s the family and kids y’all!”

“I’m probably way richer than you vagrants, so don’t bother.”

“And don’t forget to ask yourself,” the host winked before adding in the final audio. “ARE YOU NORMAL?”

[haetrack]

camboy haechan.

- ☀️

STOP bc me and winnie talked abt this one time and i vaguely remember it… and of course it’s gonna be sub haechan bc what do you expect from us

thinking abt camboy haechan who like to present himself as more dominant in his livestreams… jerks himself off while teasing all the people who watch him… people begging to see him cum, low whines leaving his mouth as people tip him to let everyone cum.

it all changes once he meets you. after a few dates, he tells you that he’s a camboy. he’s not embarrassed, not when he has an easy way to earn money while he has all these people thinking he’s the hottest person they’ve ever seen. he even shows you one of his streams, laughing at the sheepish look on your face.

it’s when you question him, asking why he acts like he’s in control in his streams when in reality, he falls apart for you. you watch his cheeks turn pink, hand scratching at the back of his neck when you catch onto his act. you smile at him, “can i… can i join one of your streams?”

which is how he finds himself squirming on your lap, his back against your chest as his cock twitches for thousands of people to see. you could see the initial confusion from all his viewers, not used to seeing haechan crying out for someone to touch him. but they all seem to adapt quickly, tips coming in asking for you to edge, to get back at all the times he teased his viewers.

he melts in your lap once your hand wraps around his cock, closing in tightly around his tip. he tried bucking his hips up into your fist, but your free hand holds him down. the precum leaking out from his tip makes the slide easier, the slick sounds of you getting him off joining his loud whimpers.

you call out to him, “aren’t you gonna tell everyone how good you feel?”

he lets out a cry, “f-fuck, thank you! feels so good, thank you all for letting me feel good!”

you can tell he’s close to cumming, his whole body shaking on top of yours. you can’t let him cum this easily. you grab his face, forcing him to look at all his loyal followers laughing at him for being so submissive. tears well up in his eyes, the humiliation only getting him closer to the edge.

you lower your voice, just enough so that his viewers can still hear, “look at how everyone’s calling you a pretty crier… can’t believe you hid this from them so well.”

he lets out a cry before you feel his cum spill over your hand. you’re surprised, lifting your hand off of him, his head falling to his shoulder as cum shoots over his chest. he tries to bring a hand to his cock, but you push it away.

“still so hard after all that…” his cock twitches in response, “do you all think he deserves to cum again? maybe let him fuck me?”

you grab a handful of his hair and push his face towards his webcam, “why don’t you beg them to let you fuck me?”

it’s embarrassing asking all these people for permission when he was the one giving out orders before. as much as he doesn’t want to let everyone see him like this, the thought of being able to bury his cock in you is more than enough for him to give up, shaky voice calling out to the people watching:

“please… need to cum, wanna show everyone how good you make me feel…”

[grimeerie]

CELLBIT'S GAME,ENIGMA OF FEAR HAS JUST LANCHED THE FREE DEMO!

ENIGMA OF FEAR'S DEMO HAS JUST ARRIVED ON STEAM! It's available both in English and Spanish! The full game will be coming out 28 of November,so i'll be talking a little about the game on this post (if any non-Ordem fan could reblog this and help spread the word,i would deeply appreciate it! Please help these brazilian projects become more known!!!!) SOME DISCLAIMERS HERE!!! : The demo is still facing a lot of bugs and other optimization issues,however Cellbit and Dumativa have confirmed they're working to fix all these issues,and they also listen to fan feedback in their discord! WARNINGS!!: There are moments with flashing white lights later in game,as well as sudden changing camera angles.

So you may be wondering: "Do i need to watch Ordem Paranormal in order to play this game?" and the answer is : No! Cellbit confirmed this game can be enjoyed even if you never watched Ordem! There will be many dialogues explaining the world and characters,especially by Samuel and Agatha! There may be a few references then and there,but that will not take your enjoyment or prevent you from understanding the story! Though if anyone does not know what Ordem Paranormal,here's a brief explanation:

What is Ordem Paranormal?

Ordem Paranormal is a survival horror,mystery TTRPG,created by youtuber/streamer Cellbit,the main campaign takes place in Brazil,where the organization Ordo Realitas help fight the threat of the Paranormal on our world.It's first season was livestreamed on 29 of February,2020,and now the main campaign has 4 seasons,and 3 spin-offs! Those who follow the QSMP may know the Quarentena spinoff,where some QSMP youtubers/streamers joined as players!

For those non-brazilians who wish to get into Ordem,the first and second season are fully translated,and as of now, the EP 6 and EP 7 of the third season,Desconjuração has come out! (Everyone please give a big warm thanks to our dear team Equipe T for their wonderful translations! They've worked very hard to help bring Ordem to outside knowledge!) NOW with that done,let's talk about the game!

What is Enigma of Fear?

Enigma of Fear is a mystery and investigation horror game,mixing 3D graphics and pixel art,developed by Dumativa and Cellbit.

You play as Mia,a paranormal detective searching for her missing father Sir Verissimo,the leader of the Ordo Realitas,a secret organization of paranormal investigators.

After dissapearing leaving only a letter,you find a lead to where he went,and along with your precious dog buddy Lupi,and other agents Agatha and Samuel,you all go to the Perimeter,a place that doesn't exist. In this game you will be able to :

1 - Explore a open-world map,with five different regions

2 - Solve many challenging mysteries with a variety of enigmas involving immersive documents,recorders,special locks with unique logic,echos of the past,etc.

3-An immersive inspection and investigation system that will make you feel like a real detective analyzing complex clues to tie together the secrets of the story! 4-Interact with NPCs: Talk to Samuel and Agatha on saferoom's radios to discover clues and information! You can also hug Lupi while in a saferoom! Isn't that just sweet? ❤️

Hope i managed to interest you to give this beauty a chance! Remember,the God of Fear is watching.

[mrsclean101]

Armin X camgirl! reader

Armin was sitting on his large bed lazily scrolling through twitter. when a website called Freaks R Us popped up on his feed. Armin accidentally clicked on the pink neon sign. I didn't do it on purpose he thought. He just wanted to get out of the strange pop up ad. Now that he was on the site he might as well look around right? On the website there really wasn't anything interesting with the streamers listed so he scrolled down he soon saw the Username $ultF0rY°u the username just stands out compared to the other ones not to mention the way the fat of her ass in the black lingerie looked bent over her computer desk. Her profile consisted of thirst traps, cosplays and the usual masturbation. Her profile had a glowing red outline to it meaning that she was currently live. He was completely compelled to go into her livestream. So he did

When Armin opened the steam was completely overstimulated first he gazed around the background of the room. He took in the interior design of her walls they were white a simple color but the countless anime posters in the background it brought the room together. The camera was set up so you have a complete view of her computer desk, sofa and decor in the background. He expected her to have a full blown masquerade ball mask on. But she didn't it was just a simple black disposable mask. Her h/l h/c was tied into a simple ponytail. She had on a revealing maid cosplay and was sitting on the top of the desk. he couldn't help but notice that her voice seemed very familiar. 

She had 3 dildos next to her. A pink short and fat one, a Long skinny one and a regular sized clear one. "Which one do you want me to use master?" She cooed to over 25,000 people. The comments went crazy and so was Armin he was hard as a rock. There were thousands of comments voting for the different choices ultimately the fat short one was the winner being about 5-6 inches long 5 inches wide. "Okay we have a winner". She sighs picking up the dildo putting it to her mouth lightly kissing at the tip. She then spits on it creating her own lubricant. Next she rubs her slender fingers over it delicately creating a up and down motion. She spreads her legs and she quickly massages over her already drenched folds spreading them open. "Look how wet I am for you" she moans quickly plunging her fingers into her tight hole her. Her eyes shot open as she kept moving her fingers to prep herself. "Okay I think I'm done no?" I don't wanna cum to early master I want you to enjoy it". She lets out flipping her self over the desk so she's on her stomach. 

FIRST PERSON POV.

I palmed my painfully hard cock through my shorts. Bitting my lip I pulled down my shorts to have my cock spring free hitting its self on my stomach. I quickly rummaged through the drawers next to me to find the nearest lotion bottle. Rubbing it in on my hands I began to fist my hard cock. "F-uck" i groaned pulling my cock roughly up and down at the sight on my laptop screen. She then takes the dildo from the desk and started fucking herself with it. "M-aster it feels really goo-ah~ f-fuck me faster". 

THIRD PERSON.

Armin was truly captured by the sounds of her cunt squelching with each one of the thrust of the dido. She soon picks up the pace of her motion so her and Armin are moving simultaneously. "I think I migh-ngnh~its t-oo mm-uch". Armin wasn't too fair behind letting out a series of grunts, moans and groans. "I-I'm goin-g to-Ahhh~" her sentence was cut off with the orgaism she tried so desperately to chase as she came a clear liquid squirted out of her. This really sent Armin over the edge and led him to his own release. The sticky white substance spilled all over his stomach. Armin doesn't know how it happened but her maid cosplay was pulled up revealing a tramp stamp on her lower back with a large Ángel written with two devil horns. Armin thought the tattoo was really hot. just thinking about it turned him on more. 

Slatyprecum donated 500 yen

BigDaddy555 donated 750 yen 

Zoro dontated 2,000 yen

Mr.horsecock donated 15,000 yen 

IAmAgirl101 donated 60,000 yen

Coloassadd!ck donated 255,000 yen

"Thank you for the donations!" She exclaimed clasping her hands together. She then came up close to the camera and whispered. " I hoped you enjoyed the show. Until next time my little devils". And the stream ended.

[httpwintersoldier]

『 do it for me, doll. pt.3 || bucky barnes x reader 』

pairing: pornstar!Bucky x f!reader words: medium summary: when life gets hard after the Avenger's disbandment Bucky has to find a new occupation, and you find it too.

『 part 1 』 『 part 2 』

Getting on the plane to New York had your legs jittery and butterflies in your stomach. You couldn't stop smiling, you felt like a teenage girl giggling about your crush. Except it was just about the opposite.

Your coworkers found it odd, that you were so happy and couldn't wait for a work related trip, but they just guessed you enjoyed travelling. Little did they know, company awaited you on the other side.

You'd only meet Bucky on your third day in New York, since you were busy the other two days, but you might as well have met him outside of the airport, because your mind was clouded with thoughts of him and what you'd do when you first saw each other. Your body felt like it was burning in every place you wanted him to touch you.

You hurried to call a cab, and once you were in the hotel you didn't bother to unpack or get comfortable, you just grabbed your phone to text Bucky (whom had obviously given you his number since scheduling a meetup via livestream chat was not ideal or practical).

You: I'm in NYC 😎

Bucky: you sure we can't see each other like... now? I want you so bad

(Picture attached)

The picture was of him, lying on his bed, wearing nothing but a pair of grey sweatpants, that were riding dangerously low on his waist.

You bit your lip, and for a second considered ditching your professional responsibilities for a good great fuck. But eventually decided against it.

You: Sorry Sergeant, duty calls, I'll see you the day after tomorrow

Bucky: you know I'll punish you for making me wait, right?

You: I do... and I can't wait.

You had no idea where your recent surge of confidence had come from (you suspected it was from all of Bucky's compliments and encouragement), but this new you was capable of saying just about anything that went through your mind.

To say you were unproductive and absolutely useless during your meetings was the understatement of the century. You were so distracted, excited and giddy by the thought of Bucky that you ended up contributing nothing to the work you were actually supposed to do. Your coworkers, however (bless them) just pinned it in nervousness for being in front of the higher-ups and covered for you.

When the day came you felt all sorts of emotions and skipped all of the coffees you'd usually have throughout the day as the added caffeine would only make it worse. A lot worse.

The workday itself was light, you only worked during the morning since your employers had meetings in the afternoon.

Come 1PM, you ate hurriedly and started to get ready, as if 6 hours wasn't enough time. You showered, did your hair and makeup (nice and heavy on the mascara so he'd have enough to mess up), lathered yourself in the nicest vanilla body lotion you had ever smelled, and got dressed.

You went all out for the meetup, even going as far as buying new lingerie for the occasion, but the man deserved it, he was cooking you dinner and serving all types of meat after all.

The set you purchased was baby pink. It was a hard cup lacy bra, that pushed up your tits in a beautiful way, with a small ribbon in between the cups. The panties were matching the top, and the back had a cut-out heart giving a perfect view of your ass. The set wouldn't be complete without the matching garter belt that connected to a sheer, white pair of tights.

You looked like a dream.

You put on a fancy outfit and gave yourself one last look in the mirror, touching up your makeup and hair, before texting Bucky.

You: I'm ready, will you make me wait till the time comes as a punishment?

Bucky: making you wait to come over would only be a punishment to me. Come one over.

Bucky shared his location.

You giggled and called an Uber to his location, sending a picture as soon as you got in the car to let him know you were on your way.

Bucky was just as giddy and nervous as you were, and he didn't know how long he'd be able to keep his hands off of you. Despite what might've been a popular belief, he didn't fuck a lot, he just happened to undress on camera.

About 15 minutes went by and Bucky was just adding the finishing touches to the dinner table when he heard your footsteps approach the door.

Ding dong.

You both took a deep breath, and the door opened.

"Y/N! Hi!"

Mesmerizing. That was the only way to describe Bucky Barnes. He smiled at you as if you weren't both thinking of the sinful things you were to do to each other.

"Nice to finally see you in person!" You said, greeting him with a hug.

He guided you inside his house - it was very minimalist, nothing but the absolutely necessary inside.

"I'm not big on decorations." Bucky said with a chuckle, as he saw you look around "But I do have beautiful chains hanging on my bedroom walls." He whispered in your ear, as an arm sneaked around your figure.

You shivered, looking over your shoulder at the man that was standing dangerously close to you. Your lips missed each other by mere milimeters, and the sexual tension was clearly palpable.

Bucky brushed his lips over yours for a split second, before completely pulling away and taking you to the kitchen. What a tease.

Bucky was a true gentleman, pulled directly from those 1940's stereotypes. He pulled out the chair for you and served your food and the champagne he had prepared.

"I hope you like it. If you don't there's a great chinese place nearby." He half-joked, since he was actually a little scared you wouldn't like the meal.

But his worries washed away when he saw your face as you took the first bite of the meal.

"Wow! This is amazing!" You complimented.

You saw his cheeks go a little red at the compliment and he smiled widely.

"Yeah? Thank you."

You'd think all of the compliments he got during streams would've made him more used to hearing them, but he still got very shy.

"Hopefully it won't be the best thing of the night..." You said suggestively, sending a wink his way.

Bucky's face instantly changed, into a look of lust and desire.

"Oh princess, this is nothing compared to what I have prepared." He winked at you, bringing the champagne glass to his lips.

The conversation flowed naturally during the dinner, which was a relief. Both of you had a secret worry in the back of your minds that you'd have no chemistry aside from the sexual attraction, but as time passed the worry faded completely.

When dinner was done, Bucky took a hold of your hand and guided you to his living room, bringing the champagne along with you. You sat down on the couch.

"You know Bucky, I'm surprised..."

Bucky rose an eyebrow at you.

"Hm? Surprised?"

"Yes," you paused, trailing your hand up his thigh "after the stunt you pulled when I came in the door I didn't think you'd last this long without doing... something."

Bucky's bionic arm gripped your wrist, just as your hand was getting to his crotch.

"Oh princess you have no idea how much I've been holding back."

The Soldier pulled you a little closer as he said that.

"Why hold back?" You whispered, as he was just so close.

"Because if I don't I won't be able to hold, back." Bucky responded, one of his hands making it's way to your cheek.

"Then don't hold back."

Those words were almost like a command for Bucky. He borught your face closer to his and kissed you, Your lips fit perfectly together, and all you both could think was "finally".

There was need and desperation in the kiss, and it was as if you were afraid to let go, as if you'd falter if you pulled away.

Bucky's vibranium arm wrapped around your figure, and brought you to his lap. His hips rolled up agains yours, as his tongue entered your mouth once more and his hands gripped your ass - you felt pleasantly overwhelmed, your mind had no idea what to focus on.

You could feel his boner against your core, and moaned at the feeling.

Bucky's hands settled on your ass and he stood up, taking you to what you assumed was his bedroom. He then laid you on the bed, standing up for a second to take of his shirt and pants.

As he worked on his clothes, you worked on yours. You removed your top and undid your zipper, so Bucky could pull down your pants and dispose of them. After he did so, he stood back, admiring your body in the pretty lingerie.

He smirked, chuckled and brushed back his semi-long hair, before climbing on top of you and pampering your chest and neck with sloppy kisses.

"You'll be the fucking death of me, doll." Bucky told you, snapping the waistband of your panties against the skin of your hip.

Your hand tangled on his hair as he marked your skin, while his hand sneaked inside your pretty underwear to find your clit.

"Oh Bucky- fuck."

The man kissed your neck, then your jaw and then your cheek.

"You sound even more beautiful in person." He said, before catching your lips in a quick kiss.

Bucky wanted to grab that pretty bra of yours and rip it out, but it was far too pretty, so his hand reached around your back and unclasped it, then peeling it off your body.

"Shit..." He groaned under his breath.

The man's lips attached to one of your nipples, as the other hand sneakily pushed your panties to the side, so he could enter you.

"This wet? Just for me? Wow I must be really good." Bucky joked, biting your breast and then kissing down your stomach.

"May... Maybe." You said, unable to sneak in a snarky reply when his tongue met your clit.

Bucky was holding your waist down with his free hand, as you couldn't help but writhe under his touch.

"Shit if you keep that up I'm not gonna last long." You said, between moans and whines.

"Then don't last long. Cum on my tongue doll, I wanna see how pretty you look up close."

Bucky curled his fingers inside of you and uncurled, picking up the pace he fingered you it. Soon after you were cumming with a loud cry of incoherent words that were meant to be "fuck Bucky, you're so good".

When your breath was steady, he came up to kiss you, and you could taste yourself on his tongue. Hot.

In a sudden act of bravery, you wrapped your legs around his waist and flipped you over, then kneeling in between his legs.

"What are we doing now doll?" He asked, with a look of amusement on his face.

You hooked your finger on the waistband of his tight boxers and pulled them down, letting his erection spring free. His cock did look bigger in person.

"Repaying the favour."

Before he could reply, you licked a strip along his shaft, before sucking his tip. You bobbed your head up and down his shaft, slowly taking more and more of him.

"Oh... fuck." He groaned and made a makeshift ponytail out of your hair, so he could watch the way his cock disappeared in your mouth.

Your hand added to the movement, and when you looked up, your teary eyes meeting his, he nearly came in your mouth.

"That's it." Bucky said, before tugging on your hair and pulling your mouth away from his cock.

Before you could register what was happening, Bucky had you on the bed with your ass up and face in the matress. He took your wrists and held them together behind your back.

Soon after, his tip found your entrance and he slipped in slowly, taking in the moment he finally got to fill you.

"Oh fuck, you feel so good doll." His compliment almost went unheard, as you were too focused on how good it felt to have him fuck you.

His hand spanked your ass and then grabbed it, loving the way it bounced when he fucked you.

As Bucky picked up the pace, your moans became more frequent and louder, making it insanely hard for him not to cum.

"Fuck it." He said, and paused, before flipping you around and entering you again "I wanna see your pretty little face when you cum on my cock, you're going to look so beautiful, all fucked out for me."

His hand wrapped around your throat as he said those words, and you swore your vision went blurry with pleasure.

"You f-feel so good Bucky- shit! Fuck!" You screamed, as he seemed to go deeper and deeper with each thrust.

It wasn't long before pleasure-filled tears streamed down your face, and your hands gripped the sheets. Your climax hit you harder than any before, and you cried out the man's name.

Bucky didn't even get time to ride out your orgasm, he simpy pulled out and came on you. All over your stomach and tits.

The man fell beside you on the bed, as you both tried to regain your breaths. After a couple seconds, you looked at each other, instantly feeling shy as if you hadn't fucked the shit out of each other.

You noticed the way his eyes drifted to your neck, and you softly ran your fingers across it.

"I'm going to have to wear a scarf tomorrow, aren't I?"

Bucky smiled and laughed.

"That would probably be best, yes." He joked, meeting your eyes.

Bucky wrapped his arm around you and pulled you close to his side, not caring if his cum stuck between your bodies, and lifted your chin up to kiss you.

"Join me. Let's film this, at least once. Please?"

"I'll think about it."

[TAGLIST]

@strndedonmars ; @geeky-politics-46 ; @high-functioning-lokipath ; @erinallene ; @yvessaintmuerte ; @kandis-mom ; @cjand10 ; @sadboiabby ; @sebastians-love ; @princezzjasmine ; @witchywonderlandchaos ; @buckysfirstbitch ; @itjustkindahappenedreally ; @strndedonmars ; @florencediet ; @mdrovert ; @barnescamboy ; @winters1917 ; @yvessaintmuerte ; @pattiemac1 ;