#it's been ages since i played anything
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i just wanna be productive again 😭
#am so tired once again#goddamnit#i know it's not like anyone even notices lol#but i haven't gotten shit done in ages#and it's eating at me#but i get home from work#eat and shower#and then i'm ready for bed no matter what 😅#i wanna do stuuuuuuff#i did play a game over the weekend tho!#it's been ages since i played anything#so that was nice
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Guess who played up to the end of the forest temple and once again lost the battle of not making a new AU last night?
Lark’s existence complicates some things in a lot of fun interesting ways let me cook on this one
I still haven’t cast a Zelda, this AU is all about Sparrow with a wolf curse, anything else is secondary
#dndads#dungeons and daddies#doodly#sparrow oak#lark oak#the doodler#I’m sorry I don’t know what wolves look like no one talk to me about how long that took#this whole thing took longer than it should have tbh#it’s been ages since I uploaded anything though#so I guess y’all can look at it#i could have just made a werewolf au I guess#but I’ve wanted to play tp for a while#so I took the excuse#just in time to be going out of town and not be able to play for a few weeks
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got asked to draw two of my old wc rp ocs :-) left is cicadahop, right is scallopstar
#my art#wc oc#squints. its been a dogs age since ive posted anything wc oc related#oc#BUT YA!!!! these guys are old. i think i made cicadahop 2018-2019 but i could be wrong/i have no way of checking haha#and scallopstar was made 2020.? i think? both are vaaastly different#if i were to play them today i think id keep a lot of things the same for cicada. shes just a silly girl who wants to make friends and#and be kind. as for scallopstar. i think id change a lot#one reason: ive gotten a lot better (I HOPE) with storytelling now that ive been playing dnd for a well over a year#and since i also run two different campaigns. two: i have more experience writing a character with an arc that turns them into a villain#three: i was really going through it at the time so. erm. LMFAO plus i was like 16 so ANDKJFGNJDFHBGJH#but yeah!!! kinda crazy looking at my old art and seeing how much ive improved#also a weird feeling to draw them again but not a Bad weird feeling. been doing a lot of reminiscing#thank god we can copy/paste tags bc if i had to rewrite this all id be so sad HAHA#the crop was weird so i wanted to fix it before it was too late lol#since these 2 are ocs im not gonna indicate this was a request the same way i will with the other requests lol
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if the solavellan subplot in datv doesnt make my entire ass explode i will break into bioware hq and chew up all their hard drives.
#:V#da#dragon age#solavellan#sorry to anyone who isnt a solasmancer. but i need this#and i know that they have to consider the average player who probably doesnt give a shit#(hasnt necessarily even played dai or any other game in the series)#but they cant make a romance like that and then act like it doesnt mean anything#its been at least 9 years since hes seen lavellan and hes probably still down so incredibly bad for them
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i think i’ve figured out what was missing for me in veilguard that made me feel a little empty inside: opportunity to rp and companion approval/disapproval actually mattering
what i miss that we didn’t get in veilguard was that in dai companions would ask you your opinions on things. cassandra would ask you about your beliefs, varric would ask where your head’s at at the moment, solas would ask what you would do in certain situations (a few examples among many others).
it really helped not only with rp, it also shed light on what matters to these characters. you may disagree with each other but that gives some flavor or context to your interactions with them. like my lavellan not believing in the maker and (iirc) in one of her positive approval conversations cassandra mentions that despite your differing beliefs she has grown to respect you and view you as a good friend
just sad that veilguard has so little of that. ig they would handwave it as “they’re on a mission to save the world they have to get along w rook and each other” but like have yall not had coworkers you don’t agree or get along with. but yall still have work to do so you stay on, but that doesn’t change the fact that you hate that coworker’s guts? idk man they could have done something like that.
and you can see that the companions do have fleshed out relationships with each other, both positive and negative! (see: bellara and emmrich, lucanis and davrin) and you see them progress over time (lucanis/davrin getting along in the end, emmrich/taash finding new topics of conversation). kind of sad that they couldn’t give rook that much depth with their relationships too
#ig this and the lacking romances are a symptom of the disease that was the fraught dev cycle for this game#i only mention dai bc it’s been ages since i last played origins and da2 pls im not a fake fan 😔#despite the differences in our beliefs cassandra became my best friend in dai#i see the vg companions forming connections w e/o but not so much with rook? like lucanis and bellara? clearly besties.#but i only say bellara is my bestie bc i as a player have gotten attached to her as a character#with rook it feels like friendship by default if anything and i think a lot fo that is bc approval/disapproval doesn’t matter in this game#shut up kat#dav spoilers#veilguard spoilers
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Sometimes, I feel Kyoko is like the Bonnie of Trigger Happy Havoc.
This sounds very weird to say but hear me out. Or... read me out since this is text.
This is unserious by the way but also a part of me is curious cus my gosh is she a hassle to find a good color to consistently give her.
Basically, in FNAF, the consensus on what the hell Bonnie is colored is all over. Is he blue? Is he purple? Indigo? It's always been questioned. Meanwhile, with Kyoko, though I haven't seen a ton of discussion around this, like, what IS her hair color. Actually. Cus sure. She's always been associated with purple and when you color pick her hair, it's almost always near the purple part of the color wheel. But also like, what color IS her hair?
I've seen it been drawn more purple, sometimes even white or silver. Hell! Her hair is described as silver in the first chapter of the game! So, what gives! Like, it's never consistent, even in official artwork!
Case in point:
This is how pale her sprite hair is btw
Also, it's not that any other character's been consistent with this in the series. Then again, at least I can tell that Byakuya's blonde, Makoto's a brunette, that Sakura has white hair and that Leon's a red head.
Plus, I feel that the shade of her hair is what MAKES it look purple. Which leads me to question more. Is it leaning closer to white? Silver? Does she just have purple undertones but it's not actually purple. And like, did her purple hair lighten with age or something cus novel Kyoko's hair is a lot more obviously purple compared to when we first me the girl. Or, does she dye it? Like, make it look like a darker purple in Dr3? Would she even have access to hair dye with the state of the world?!
And like, girl, I get it. You got your mysterious bit going on. But, dang it girl! Pick a lane!
#danganronpa#danganronpa kyoko#kyoko kirigiri#shitpost#just a dumb ramble that's very unserious for the most part#goodness tho... been playing around with my art for a bit & have nothing done yet so i wanted to at least give some food for the populous#also she's fine to draw but her hair and skin are such a pain sometimes cus she's very pale and her hair is strange#and a part of me wants to be accurate but also how can i be accurate when SHE isn't even dang accurate T-T#not even like she's in special lighting either. this is just how she is. the inner machinations of her hair are an enigma u_u#also she's not the only dangan character with hair like this. for instance chiaki is no better. she is a dangan bonnie too which fits tbh#chiaki's a gamer girl after all. though my gripe with her hair is more that i literally cannot describe what color it is. so weird#once i start playing the second game of the series i will be sure to make a similar post about chiaki since i'll be drawing her by then#but yeah! just a little ramble that i've had stored for a while and questioned if it was a good idea but screw it. i'm setting it free!#i still love kyoko anyway! she's cool and cute and i love her but i can bully her about her whack ass hair color too#and i feel i'll just headcanon that it was purple when she was younger but became lighter with age due to stress and age#so she kinda prematurely grey'd kinda but it's silver with slight purple undertones. also know this is prob like color theory shenanigans#like her hair is just color theory shenanigans but like still. it's not fully consistent or anything
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thinking about playing hl1 & 2 again… perhaps streaming them too
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i finished the duel monsters dub for the first time ever last night (!!!) so i figured i oughta lock down my faces for the aibous... what a show, man
#yugi muto#yami yugi#atem#puzzleshipping#yugioh#ygo#ygo dm#duel monsters#my art#ive had atems face pretty set for literally years but ive never managed a yugi i was 100% happy with... this one is MUCH closer tho#i might render this later + experiment with some other hairstyles for them... i prefer drawing them with afrotextured hair#sketch#there are so many other yugioh artists who do such PHENOMENAL interpretations of ygo hairstyles in diff textures & styles!!!#i dont think ill be bringing anything new or revolutionary to the table hsdfghjkl. but i wanna play around w it!#i wanna experiment with‚‚‚ atem mullet‚‚‚ similar to how i did it in my yami jareth art. the super long jellyfish mullet is so cute on him#also!!! its so crazy to me to be done w the DM dub!!! ive loved yugioh for ages but had never managed to finish the show#but i decided some time last year/the year before that i was gonna try again in Earnest and!!! wow!!! call me matchbox 20#because how far weve come...#this is a big deal to me ive been into yugioh (as an adult) since like 2014ish so this has been a long time coming!!!#im gonna read the DM manga next and i think we are gonna do DSOD this week#then i guess jump right into GX!!! ive been cosplaying jaden for so long its gonna be crazy to watch his actual series...#i only know him from bonds beyond time hsdfghjkl. AND BBT ABRIDGED... MY AUTISM MOVIE...#anyway. yugioh. 🥺🥺🥺💖💖💖😭😭😭💕💕💕
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man .
#i gotta put this somewhere. i'm complaining about the guys and expressing my disappointment in the tags#this is just my own feelings and discomfort don't have to agree or comment on anything. anyone can have their own thoughts#i should stop looking them up or even bother checking their socials and what they're up to#if not i'd just be rolling my eyes and making myself more annoyed at them lol#i don't feel as bad for not caring since it's probably too much to expect that#white patriotic american middle aged men to not support their hell of a cuntry aka that violent imperial core nightmare#i was kinda fond of them at first but now it just leaves a sour taste in my mouth that i rather just avoid because#bringing this up has no benefit anyway. anything said more will just be regarded as a 'cancel culture' attempt but#they're not bad people. they are good people and that's entirely the point#it's not a unique problem and for as long as that imperial nightmare stays in power anyone who willingly supports it and its actions#show that some lives are worth more than other lives all so that western society will always have more power#and is not something worth worrying about. they're just strangers to me anyway. i don't care about them i don't want to care about them#again this is not me saying they're bad or 'problematic' people. they are good people and that's why it disappoints me#but like i said it's not worth worrying about since they are just an example rather than the core issue#i just wanted to write this down because the bitterness is just there now lol#i've been able to separate the real people/actors and the characters they play so it doesn't affect my enjoyment as much anymore#i'm just. sorry for talking negatively lol i know people use their interests as an escape like i know. i use this show as my escape too#but some things are just hard to ignore when they affect real life so.. eh .#i still like the show and the characters haha i'm just fighting with myself internally i guess idk#like it doesn't really hurt to enjoy them. it's not bad. i'm allowed to disagree with the creators of something i like#my ramblings
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thinking about vampiric arakawas again just so i can make a 'blood-sucking politician' joke
#snap chats#have i ever posted my vampire arakawa musings. i think i did long ago in a distant land. or at least for halloween vjaERLVKJ#anyway i was having my evening stroll with my dog and thinking about how much i love dark-renaissance age stories and whatever#which is a weird way to lead into vampires since At Least Dracula vampire stories dont start until the victorian - progressive era#though i guess you can do whatever you want with mythical creatures and its not as if vampiric stories cant start during the 1400s either#theyre immortal and Not Real (i hope) so anythings possible theres no need to be super restrictive#i am. literally not getting to the point Point Is it could be funny .....#thats why they cna be really good assassins like just eat your targets tf <- vampires dont eat people#but then of course i have to wonder the implications ... oh ive definitely made this post but im still curious#fuuuck man i wanted to make my joke but i just realized how do i even get to that joke cause i dont think masato would be a vampire#dhampir as i definitely said way back then IF THAT. what were the circumstances wait shut up why are there police next door#bro im too nosy this post is interrupted hang on#not nosy enough to keep watching im bored its probably nothing anyawy. cause i think sawashiro and ikumi woudlve been human#like during the uhhh idk dark ages and maybe arakawa turns sawashiro into a vampire later on but what of masato .....#idk im not gonna think too hard about it. right now just take my blood-sucking politician joke idea we'll figure it out later#stopppp i was wondering about vampires in japanese pop culture but then i rmemebered mandurugo WHICH. are filipino but STILL FOUL#im everywhere im ending the post now bye#wait i have to end this post cause why tf did my bestie send me a tweet being like 'look forward to the future of chao'#since shadow x sonic generations is coming soon LIKE DONT PLAY WITH ME AVBOUT CHAO I DONT PLAY ABOUT THEM FUCKERS#ok im ending the post now for real bye im gonna throw up
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throwing up because it's 'I love my friends' hours
#[static]#it's been an AGE since I've been so excited to see people that I genuinely can't wait#i hate being seen Wanting it makes me physically ill lmao but i want to hang out with my best friends and smash our characters together#but also i would love to just do anything with them like sit on the couch and watch them play games i dont care i just wanna vibe#also i need to unpack why being happy makes me feel like im gonna be sick & why showing i care about people makes me want to bare my teeth
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like i wouldnt mind like. Not having new linear games post 5 its judt that sims 4 wasnt even supposed to Be The Sims 4 it was a last minute pivot and the base code is so outdated and was broken On launch so like. i just wish we could have the final actual sims game be like. one that was always intented to be a major sims release AND be intended to be so long term . yk
#i dont even want like. Ooh major graphical updates whatever if sims 5 was announced and they looked photorealizstic id hurl i wouldnt play#it#my ideal would ig be sims 4 with a touch more realism style wise. if this makes sense#like its a bittt too cartoony for me but i like the like. Clay hair or whatever SJFNFJ. and i think having it be simple in basegame means#you can customize it easier + itd run better on more pcs#so im fine eith that. i would nottt want it more cartoony#i also like. I understand the sims is like. an all ages game i do sometimes wish that the animations in 4 were a bit toned down#like i dont mind silly goofy wacky stuff i think its fun and like. The sims has always been a bit sillay yk. but the overexaggerated#animations r sometimes like -_-.... to me. but thats personal preference#IDK. the tags that show up when i type idk r so funny. do i ever know anything. sources say no#BUT ya i just rly wish like. if this is what they wanna do i wish theyd give us One more full game give it lots of time and love and rly rly#focus on having it excel at like. being this partnof the sims#since they wanna have like. Other sims games that have online features and multiplayer and everything. they could use that to make sure that#ts5 was Rly solid as a foundation and as like. ykwim..... they could plan updates for the future And dlc or whatever and i just think itd be#a better move than trying to make sims 4 happen#bc i judt dont think With all the updates in the world. sims 4 wont ever be like. what it couldve been. yk. i just dont think you can make#it work without Fullllyyyy just starting over.#and at this point with like..so many modders and stuff and everything and how much dlc there is thatd be impossible Esp if they keep#releasing new stuff which. They will ^_^#idk. im excited for some other lifesim games im keeping my eye out#but i rly do love the sims and i just wish that it could be as good as it could be. It has such a huge budget and team and like. if ea would#stop just trying to make as much money as possible off it i feel like they could make Such an amazing game. not to put down indie gamedevs#at all the games jve been looking at look Incredible like.. yk. but the fact those games are so good eith FAR smaller teams and budgets is#like. imagine what we could have if the sims had that amt of care and time put into it.#but whatever whatever whatever. sorry im just rambling#again ik what i would want from my platonic ideal of a sims game isnt what everyone would eant#but idk. i feel like another good step might be like. making the other sims games more available and updating them so they run better on#modern pcs. but i dont think thatll ever happen DNDNFJFNFN.
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the end of emmrich's personal quest made me sob so hard, I love him a concerning amount
#count wordulas#dav#dragon age#i feel like emmrich was written by my deepest desires fjshdjfhssjd#manfred is also so pure and sweet and the relationship between those two is so beautiful#rook honestly is third wheeling and loving it becauze nobody gets between emmrich and his sON#but like emmrichs last line about not trading what he has for anything had me weeping#especially since my own fear of death has been crippling at various points in my life#but having rich meaningful connections with others and fulfillment in life makes it less painful#ive already played that ending bit through twice and i will again and again
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if i think abt the griffins too hard i WILL go insane
i just gotta focus on how cute assan is and how much i love his ears
#meredith plays dragon age#this isnt abt anything you learn in game this is stuff ive been thinking since i read last flight
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my dr was supposed to call me 20 mins ago and i desperately need some sleep and it’s not even that important, just routine blood test results that she’ll leave a message about if there’s an issue, but i’m not gonna be able to sleep anticipating a call fml
but everything has gone according to plan because she called me while i was making this post. crisis averted, goodnight
#personal#turns out my thyroid is creeping towards getting bad again so. it was actually an important call rip!!!!!!!#not that i’ll be able to sleep anyway because there’s backburning happening very close to me and i can’t sleep when i can smell smoke#i’ve been sleeping 12+ hrs per day again (i was about to say for no reason but maybe it’s my thyroid) so i woke up at 8pm yesterday#so i was like yeah it’ll be easier to stay up for this 2pm call than to try to wake up for it#wish i hadn’t tbh. well idk. now that the call actually was important im kinda glad#but hey i’ve been getting back into reading fanfic#i’ve never really got into it with dragon age. i think because i focus a lot on my protags so they’re not part of anything#but since i’ve been playing bg3 as gale…… i’ve read at least four 100k word bloodweave fics in the last few weeks#so i spent the last 6-ish hrs reading another. good way to just chill
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Hmmm I kinda want to make a side blog for RPG Maker game development related things to be able to talk to more experienced people in that community, but at the same time I both don’t really think I’d get much attention and don’t want to accidentally spoil my own game (^^ ; ).
I have a rough story, concept doodles, a tileset, some character sprites, an enemy that walks around but can’t initiate battle yet (if I even decide to have a battle system), a couple rooms with some events, and a functioning run button, but I’m still lost on how to do much else at the moment. Especially since this program has the ability for scripting, meaning I’ll probably have to learn and actually retain another coding language.
So, I’m not very far at all lol. Idk how well that’d go over on the established fandom website, but eh.
#text post#incoherent rambling#project update#game project#I’m still also debating whether or not I can actually even make a proper horror game too#It’s the rule of like just being a horror fan doesn’t make you good at horror being afraid of something does? ya know?#I am trying to go with things that scare me personally but it’s been difficult#either things aren’t concrete of concepts enough or are wayyyy too oddly specific to make anything about#which is quitter talk I know but how does one translate the childhood heebee jeebees of watching top ten gaming videos past bedtime 💀💀💀#or like the way too broad general fear of lack of control without making it too on the nose or too vague#truly a balancing act writing is#kinda ironically I am also a little bit less afraid of hospitals after having been to one for myself rather than family members#which makes things both more and less difficult???#on one hand I have better references for them now but on the other hand I’m desensitized to it 😔#I think I get used to things a little too easily for a lot of things to stay scary#the thing was a scary movie the first time I saw it and now it’s a comfort film#funger was a very scary game until I first died and reloaded a save with little consequence and now it’s just a spooky but fun rpg#but then at the same time thinking about a movie studio logo before a movie that scared me as a kid cause there was a monster in it#still gives weird left over shivers but actually seeing it doesn’t anymore for some reason#I feel like that’s how it’s worked with most things I’ve ever been afraid of in my life besides concepts like death control or idk drowning#ugh writing is HARD#but actually making a functional and fun to play game is harder oh my god do I not know how to make puzzles#I have made swivel chairs that can be knocked and walked over but that’s about it and idk what to do with that knowledge lmaooooo#and I don’t want the entire gameplay loop to be read text search room get key repeat cause that’s boring#I have also desperately tried making a stamina system but there’s not much help with that online especially not in the rpg maker forums#the no necroposting rule sucks all the threads for questions I have never get answered and never will cause no one is allowed to due to age#anyway idk what to tag this probably won’t get seen since it’s not my usual anyway but eh whatever I’ll think about this#hopefully I remember the passwords to two blogs 💀💀💀
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