#it's always just lacking... Something that other artists seem to have that causes people to engage

[floweryfandomnerd]

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[greenfiend]

Will already has powers…

And I think I figured out exactly what they are.

This is a long theory post. Get some popcorn, get comfortable and be prepared to have some common fandom perspectives get flipped upside down. Nothing is as it seems.

(Trigger warning for some serious subject matters such as: homophobia, SI, m*rder, and CSA.)

Before we begin, let me remind you of what’s seen behind our boy in the photo above.

This post will, indeed, open that curtain. As Murray states, revealing what’s behind the curtain will cause some to feel unease. The unease may be caused by distaste of the theory overall or discomfort of the serious subject matters. So proceed with caution…

To begin, who is Will Byers?

A young boy who doesn’t fit in with the 1980s norms. A boy who escapes through fantasy.

In fantasy he’s a wizard… a cleric…

Outside of fantasy he’s an artist… a creator…

He’s a boy who’s different. He stands out from the rest, yet he manages to remain hidden for the most part. He’s “good at hiding”.

He is a part of a small loving family of three. His mother Joyce and his older brother Jonathan. His biological dad is estranged (more on him later).

Will has a few friends when we begin the show: Lucas, Dustin, and Mike. Mike and Will have a bond that’s different from the others (more on them later).

Will is a young boy who has experienced a lot of trauma, from bullying peers and an abusive parent to being victimized by supernatural forces. There’s a lot going on for him both internally and externally. These also happen to correlate with each other quite frequently. Suspiciously frequently in fact. Which leads me to this conclusion:

Will’s powers involve shaping the world around him based on his warped views of himself, his sexuality, and his mental health. He’s literally “reshaping the [external] world” to match his internal world; “remake it however [he] sees fit.”

Wow okay slow down there, you may be thinking. You’re really saying he has God like abilities? Well, sort of- but he lacks the insight or control over his own abilities at this point. Just bare with me here and keep an open mind as things will get stranger…

Moving away from the deeper aspects of his character, let’s look at something superficial: his name.

William “Will” Byers

The name William means “Determined” or “Resolute Protector” or “Strong Helmet”. Okay.

Byers means someone who lives by a cattle-shed. Hm. Okay.

But wait… let’s go back. What does the name “Will” mean?

Well… there’s multiple meanings but let’s focus on the highlighted one.

“Mental powers” you say? A name that literally means the ability to make others do things or make things occur? To bend things to one’s will…

When did he get these powers?

I’m not confident in the answer to this but I think he may have always had the powers. Just like his sexuality, he was born this way.

It’s very likely that he was specifically targeted back in the first episode because of this, then was possessed afterwards for the same reason.

I mean… for a villain who wants to “reshape the world”- why wouldn’t he want the powers of a boy with this ability?

As I believe his powers are intertwined with his sexuality, they began manifesting much more once puberty hit. Will likely has used his powers in seasons 1 and 2 but very subtly. In season 3, they become more obvious but still in the shadows (and unbeknownst to him…he suppresses it). They emerge in correlation with his blooming sexuality.

Season 3 is associated with possession, and the concept of free will is a frequent theme. The characters discuss how to look out for people acting out of the ordinary, out of character if you will. Any characters that come to mind?

Hopper was noticeably different this season. Coincidentally, the same season Will desperately held onto his childhood innocence, Hopper acted suspiciously immature.

Will wants El and Mike to break up. Hopper wants El and Mike to break up.

Mike explains to Lucas that Hopper “threatened” him while we immediately cut to Will. What’s Will doing here? He is moving DnD characters on a board. He is manipulating the characters here… playing dollhouse… being a puppet master. This little guy was so jealous of Mike and El that he influenced Hopper to try and break them up!

We are shown other little incidences of Hopper acting Will-like too. He suddenly buys a shirt that’s different than his usual wardrobe- “that’s a lot of color chef”. Will is known for wearing colourful clothes, that’s highlighted as a reason he is seen as “different” and is bullied for it. Hopper has trouble pronouncing an alcoholic beverage, saying “cheeanti” when he is well acquainted with alcohol. While Will is dressed up as Will the Wise, Lucas asks Will for permission to shower- then we cut to Hopper showering. Hopper acts very immature in his jealousy, just as Will does. Both Hopper and Will have big fights with Joyce and Mike in episode 3 of season 3. When El asks “how do we know when someone’s a host?” the scene immediately ends and we are shown Hopper. Will is using Hopper as a host! There’s even more evidence than this but we shall move on from here.

So wait, Will possessed Hopper? Well, not exactly. Hopper was under the influence of Will. Remember what Will said about the mindflayer: “He likes to hide. He only used me when he needed me.”

There was another character acting out of the ordinary this season…

That’s right! Mike.

I’ll come back to him more later but in the meantime, let me offer you this theory:

The rain scene. Now what if I said that Will was the one projecting onto Mike? What I mean is: Will’s internal thoughts “it’s not his fault I don’t like girls!” becoming a reality. Mike never meant to say this- it was all Will’s doing. His internalized homophobia became externalized. It’s oddly fitting too that in the episode with Will’s emotional breakdown, it’s raining.

The devastating depth of Will’s trauma

Within the show, we know our boy has experienced a lot of suffering, but subtext tells us it’s much worse than we see on the surface.

Will’s father is a homophobic and abusive asshole yes, but he’s more than that.

There’s an alarming amount of evidence that this man was not only emotionally and physically abusive but also sexually abusive to both Will and his older brother.

He likely was especially homophobic towards Will because he projected his actual perverse sexuality unto him. He likely dealt with his shame by blaming his innocent young son.

This leads us to: November 6th, 1983. Originally, I do believe that Will died by the hands of his own cruel father. His father likely picked him up from his bike ride home (his bike left behind), ended his life by strangulation, put him in the back of his trunk, and dumped him into Sattlers Quarry (where his fake body was found).

I believe somehow someone was able to reverse this (more on this later). The clock turned back and a new timeline was created. Will was then abducted and brought to the upside down. Instead of heaven or hell, he was in purgatory. Time came to an abrupt halt in the upside down… the exact same time his life ended in the original timeline. This is where timelines diverge.

Now Will’s purgatory is also his internal world, his own mind. The upside down manifests itself as this. It’s dark, cold, scary, lonely, and unsettling. He’s trapped in his own head, where he relives some of his most traumatic memories. We see him being victimized by the Demogorgon (an alternate title for Demogorgon is “The Deep Father” x ) and we also see him being assaulted (in a sexual manner) by vines.

By the time Will is rescued, he is struggling with suicidal thoughts (the song “When It’s Cold I’d Like to Die” tells us this). Poor boy has been in a deep dark depressive state. In season 2, his possession is a real manifestation of his PTSD.

The monsters represent how he views himself- he’s a monster. I’d argue his internalized homophobia is a lot worse than we actually think. It’s not just the homophobic environment around him, it’s also the ongoing rhetoric that the victim will inevitably become a perpetrator. As we see the common occurrence of toxic cycles continuing: he fears he has no agency and will become his own father.

Jonathan can relate, but because he’s solely attracted to women and thus more “normal”, it’s not as bad for him. But Steve really pushed his buttons when he implied that Jonathan is a creep like his father.

So yes, Will sees himself as a monster because of his attraction to men. Thus, he manifests the monsters in the monster show.

Speaking of his attraction to men…

Mike

Will loves Mike, he’s hopelessly devoted to him. Mike feels the exact same way. In the original timeline, Mike ultimately decides to jump into Sattlers Quarry to reunite with his love in death.

Will “jumps”, Mike jumps too. Luckily, a new timeline was created, giving both of them a second chance at life and love.

In the alternate timeline (the show), season 1 sees Mike leave no stones unturned in his search for his best friend. In season 2, we see how Mike normally is with Will. He’s so devoted! He’s always by Will’s side throughout everything. It’s beautiful! This is the authentic Mike.

So. What happened in season 3? Mike’s internalized homophobia?

Well partially I’m sure, but in this post I’m offering an alternate theory: Mike’s behavior is explained by Will’s internalized homophobia.

What do I mean by this?

Well as I said, Will reshapes the external world in the image of his internal world. He doesn’t believe he deserves Mike’s love. He’s scared. He’s been “inventing things” so he can push Mike away.

He obviously wants nothing more than to be with Mike, but due to his insecure attachment style and his internalized homophobia, he’s been the one pushing him away this entire time with his powers.

How has he been pushing Mike away exactly?

He’s been pushing Mike towards El.

Wait, didn’t he help break them up through Hopper?

Well, yes, but the sweet sensitive boy that he is likely felt bad, he regretted his actions after their rain fight fallout and wanted to give his “olive branch” and make amends.

Will believes the best way to do so is to push Mike and El back together. Like Lucas, Will gives Mike guidance by, essentially, being the master to his puppet.

(Above is actually Will’s apology to Mike.)

In Will’s mind, Mike is straight. He would never reciprocate Will’s feelings. So, Will believes that Mike should be happy with El then.

Will literally is putting words in Mike’s mouth here. Look how focused Will is in this scene, and how often Mike turns to him. It’s as though Will is mouthing to Mike exactly what words he (thinks) he should say.

Here Will is at it again! But Mike is resisting. The words aren’t able to come out. Will’s signal is poor, Mike couldn’t fully understand him.

So Will, as misguided but well intended as he is, attempts to bring Mike and El back together.

No wonder Mike couldn’t exactly remember his words…

He’s genuinely confused here!

This leads me to…

This foreshadowing shot tells us that Will is the director here. He fed Mike the script he had to read. So yes, I’m saying that Will did not just push Mike to say those words to El, he forced him to. Mike did not have any agency here.

Now, like me, you may be concerned about this. Will is bending Mike to his will? Won’t the audience then assume Will forced Mike to be gay with him? Pushing that toxic homophobic narrative?

Well that’s the thing- Will is not forcing a straight man to be gay. Will is trying to make a gay man straight! Ahhh trope subversion.

El

So I’m not going to delve too much into El in this post, because El and Will deserve their own post. But I do strongly believe they are much more connected than we think.

Vecna

Where does Vecna fit into this theory? Well for starters, I don’t believe Vecna himself is Will, he is definitely a separate entity. The major difference between Will and Vecna is that Will will no longer be restrained by his shadow, he will be able to differentiate himself from his shadow. Vecna has chosen to become one with the shadow.

Also, like Mike, Vecna is heavily associated with time. Vecna takes time away from others but Mike gives time. I do agree with the Wheeler and Creel being connected theories.

Time

Time is a major theme within the show. As I mentioned previously, Will possesses powers where he can manipulate his environment, his space. Will is space, but he is lacking the 4th dimension.

The upside down is frozen in time, essentially lacking time. It needs time, and it always will! That’s right- Mike is time.

That boy is frequently associated with it. Running late at the beginning of each season, mentions of “turning back the clock”, etc.

Mike “turned back the clock” and saved Will from his original fate. Similar to the scene where Mike jumps off the cliff and is saved by El, Mike reverses his fall by rewinding time. He went all the way back to the night of November 6th, 1983. Preventing the original timeline from occurring.

Mike gave Will the greatest gift of all- time.

Remember time heals all wounds. Wounds being the gates.

Together, Mike and Will are spacetime. Which is beautiful because not only does this mean they are equals in every way but they can literally create their own fantasy world together.

Conclusion

This show has a lot of layers. I tried to really dig deep but still I feel like I just scratched the surface. I will say this though: I am utterly confident that everything leads back to Will. He is the center of the entire show, like it or not. Without Will, there is no Stranger Things. Now of course this is not “the Byler show” but their relationship is incredibly important. Mike’s unconditional love and devotion to Will is a key aspect of the solution to the conflict. He makes Will “feel better for being different”. His love, along with his other friends and family, will inevitably lead to the upside down (Will’s mind) becoming a beautiful place. Instead of rot and decay, there will be blooming flowers and sunlight.

If you’d like to discuss any aspect of these theories with me, feel free! Like I said, I’m only scratching the surface here. Let me know your thoughts.

[thisgirlnamedblusy]

Hi! I enjoy suffering for a couple of minutes with your angst stories hahaha

It's a fact that Donna is a very cultured woman so how about a storie where she and reader are soon to be married and all that, but reader insecurities have been eating her alive cuz she doesn't feel intelligent enough next to Donna, like they don't share the same music taste, maybe reader enjoys pop and newer artists unlike Donna and she tries to suppress that. reader thinks donna will think less of her or something.

one day maybe one of donna's siblings makes fun of reader's lack of knowledge in the arts or something and that makes reader just snaps and cause a fight back at home and throwing the wedding ring to donna and telling her to find a wife worthy of someone smart like her. donna comforts reader telling her she only wants her, and already noticing that reader doesn't know the same things like her, tells her she knows about other stuff and has other talents making reader realize she is also smart, but with other stuff. fluff at the end of course, not all can't be angst 😅

Yesss!!! I don't know if I should feel flattered to know you suffered... (I'm just joking :P) Thank you for your support and for your request!!! I hope you like it and sorry about the language mistakes!!!! :))))

Not enough for you

Pairing: Donna Beneviento x Fem! Reader

Warnings: Angst, fluff, insecurities…

Word count: 7,155

Summary: You thought she was perfect, and you just were stupid....

N/A: Sorry about the language mistakes!!! Just a heads up: Everyone has their own talents, and I don't think someone is less smart or intelligent. All the people are genius in doing something, the thing is to find what, just remember that!!! Requests are open!!! I'm waiting yours :))) I love you all!!!

“Do you think it can be fixed? Maybe we should call the Duke and…” Donna commented as you crouched down, looking at the old record player.

“Mm, let me take a look,” you said, opening the closet doors and illuminating the intricacies of the device with a flashlight. “Yes, I know where the problem is, come.”

The lady in black nodded suspiciously, looking at the place you indicated while arching your eyebrows, satisfied.

“I don't see anything, tesoro,” she said, frowning.

“It's this piece here, it seems that time has passed too quickly for it,” you said amused, moving away from the closet and searching for something in a toolbox. “It just needs to be replaced.”

Donna nodded slowly as you searched for the desired item with a concentrated look.

“Aspetta, (Y/N), it might be dangerous,” the lady said, putting a hand on your shoulder before you started to dig around in the record player. “It might give you a cramp or…”

“Bah, calm down,” you sighed with a distorted voice, as you grabbed the flashlight with your teeth. “Mm, jusft, a bif, tighfer and… voilà,” you finally said, with a satisfied smile, standing up and brushing the dust off your dress.

“Is that it?” she asked, looking at the machine with curiosity. “That easy?”

“Look,” you said with a triumphant look, bringing the old piece closer to the lady. “Do you see this thing here? It seems that it was so worn out that it wasn't able to make the disc tray spin,” you explained, running your finger along the frayed piece. “I think that's why we always listened to the same 2 seconds over and over again.”

“Oh,” Donna sighed, making the same gesture and confirming your words. “It seems that nothing lasts forever”

“It will last, as long as I'm here,” you said arching your eyebrows and putting away the tools. “There is no device that can resist me.”

“I see,” the lady in black said, laughing amused and unexpectedly grabbing your waist while placing a soft kiss on your lips. “Thank you, Lady Beneviento.”

You blushed and gave a soft punch to her shoulder while you struggled amused against her kisses.

“Hey, you haven't stolen my last name yet, let me enjoy it while I can,” you joked, stealing another kiss from the lady. “There's still a month left,”

“I still can't believe you're going to be my wife...” Donna whispered, joining her forehead with yours while her hands caressed your cheeks. “Sometimes I think I'm dreaming and that one day I'll wake up... and you won't be here anymore...”

You opened your eyes and shook your head, lifting the lady's chin.

“Hey, Donna,” you said, getting her attention, taking her out of a brief sad moment, of painful memories. “This is better than any dream.”

She smiled, kissing you again and lifting you in the air, spinning you like one of her old records, creating tender laughter that bounced off the walls of the old mansion.

It had surely been a long time since that wallpaper and those wooden panels had witnessed the happiness of their owner.

“(Y/N)… my wife,” the lady murmured with a tender smile, brushing her nose against yours and making you blush again. “I never thought there would be someone like you in my life, someone to marry, to start a family with…”

“Wow, slow down, darling,” you said amused, pushing the doll maker away with a frown. “Don't go so fast, you are immortal, aren't you? We have enough time for that.”

“You're right, I'm sorry,” she said in a low voice, blinking to get out of her own fantasies. “Sometimes I get too excited.”

“It's okay, I like the way you are, Donna,” you responded to her apologies, stealing one last kiss and definitely moving away from her. Otherwise, you couldn't do it; you were terribly addicted to her kisses.

It was another day, another day that joined the countdown of the most important moment of your life.

In that sinister village, love was the last thing you could expect. Fidelity to the Gods, responsibilities to them and the Lords kept you, the poor villagers, from wishing or dreaming of a normal life.

But you always lived in your dreams, in the desire to change the destiny that had been programmed for you when you were born. You weren’t a fervent devotee like the rest of your friends, and to you, Mother Miranda, and her adopted children weren’t deities but obstacles to deal with.

You always tried to stay away from that fanaticism. You never wanted to follow the complacent and submissive flock. Surely you deserved to be punished for your lack of faith, but soon you learned that your different attitude wouldn’t give you problems, but quite the opposite.

When you met her, when Donna Beneviento, youngest Lord and a dark woman, crossed your path, you began to think that perhaps in some way they were Gods. You didn't think so because of her powers, her living doll, or her beauty, one that took you too long to discover.

The attraction you began to feel for her was very different from your previous love infatuations. Donna exerted an unknown, addictive and merciless influence on you, forcing you, shortly after kissing her lips for the first time, to fall madly in love with her.

Yes, it wasn’t easy to deal with a woman like her; a woman with complexes about her appearance, a sick woman who from a very early age had to see herself enveloped in the halo of darkness that the embrace of the Black Gods gave her without asking.

Difficulties, crises, jealousy, doubts… It was an odyssey worthy of telling in a boring romance book, but it was your odyssey, your adventure, the conquest of a wounded heart, of a lost soul that found its place with you.

After several years in the old mansion, of kisses, hugs, passion, laughter, tears… the lady in black couldn’t wait any longer to strengthen your commitment, to impatiently ask you that words stop being just that, and become an unbreakable union.

Fearing that your romance was only fleeting, full of doubts and insecurities, Donna took the next step to convince you and herself that you would never leave her, that there would be something, a ceremony that would say that indeed, your love was forever.

You couldn't say that you had no doubts about marriage, because that would be a lie. It seemed a little hasty to you despite those 4 wonderful years. Maybe it was because you never considered getting married as something truly important in a place like that.

But, above all, it was important to Donna, and that was all you needed when the lady knelt down and swore eternal love to you by showing you a shiny ring. You rambled for days about what your new status would be: wife of a Lord, consort Lord, wife of an immortal demigoddess...

All of that was just rambling, the product of the innocent doubts of a 21-year-old girl facing something as serious and adult as marriage. You stopped seeing it that way very soon after and you knew exactly what you would be: You would be Donna's wife, and that was more than enough; you would be just (Y/N) Beneviento.

“My love... Are you okay?” you asked carefully when you saw that the lady didn’t move from the spot, looking at the floor. “Honey, you are shaking...” you said worriedly as you took her hand.

“No, I'm not okay,” Donna murmured, blinking erratically, breathing the same way. “I-I got suddenly nervous...”

“Mm,” you murmured caressing her cheek, sad to see how the lady's madness always chose the worst moment to show itself. “Shh, calm down, honey... Oh, Donna, are you having another crisis?”

The lady only nodded, letting herself be comforted by your caresses.

“I-I need a moment,” she whispered with a broken voice, surely fighting against the demons in her mind. “I have to make them shut up…”

“I'll tell Angie to stay with you,” you whispered in a tender voice, enduring the excessively strong grip of her hand in yours. “I'm going to... I'm going to make you some tea.”

“N-No, io...” she stammered, shaking her head. “I'll go, (Y/N), I want to be alone... yes, I... I'll be right back.”

“Okay,” you sighed, nodding and being an expert in controlling those episodes, knowing what to do at every moment. “Okay, honey.”

Poor Donna. Fate had been terribly cruel to her, leaving the illness of her mind as the only memory of her family. It was terribly painful for her but for you, it was much worse.

Luckily, over time you learned to take care of her, to comfort her when the voices in her head whispered horrible things. For you, nothing was impossible with her, nothing would ever stop you from loving her.

“Perdonami, (Y/N)” Donna whispered, moving away from you and walking quickly towards the elevator hallway, letting a sob escape from her lips.

“Donna…” you sighed, feeling helpless for not being able to do anything else for her, resigning and letting yourself fall on the couch, looking for the book you used to read. “Well, I can only wait.”

The truth is that you were never bored during those waits or during Donna's work with her dolls. It was a big mansion, with many old devices to tinker with and an unfinished mountain of books to read.

Besides, you always had company, the Angie doll always ran away from her owner's fits of madness for fear of being deactivated. Well, that’s what she told you, you knew that in reality, even if she denied it, that irreverent doll enjoyed your company.

“It was the detective,” the doll said, pointing at your book with enthusiasm. “I'm sure, silly.”

“How could it have been the detective? Angie, haven't you heard the story?” you asked amused, turning a page. “It was the dressmaker.”

“Oh, you're so sure of your words,” the doll hummed, sitting on your lap. “Where does it say that?”

“It doesn't say that, that's the point,” you said. “Do you even know how to read?”

“I can read your mind,” Angie hissed, getting too close to your face.

“Oh, really?” you asked as your eyes wandered over the letters of that detective story. “Well, I hope you're not reading it to me right now…”

“Hey, you shouldn't judge any character before knowing the truth,” the doll snapped at you, making you roll your eyes. “You have no proof.”

“Oh, I have,” you said nodding, turning another page, looking up when you heard the familiar sound of heels on wood. “Donna, are you better?”

“Sì,” the lady replied, her expression more relaxed, embarrassed. “I'm sorry.”

“Don't be,” you said, going back to your book.

“Hey, Donna, Donna,” the doll said jumping off the couch and tugging at the lady's black dress. “The fool thinks she's Sherlock Holmes or something, she says it was the dressmaker.”

“We were reading,” you explained, letting the lady come closer, giving you a soft kiss on the cheek and glancing at your reading.

“The Tape-Measure Murder,” she commented, whispering the title. “Mm, I'm convinced you don't need to read the end to find out the truth.”

“Sometimes Agatha Christie makes it too easy… it's obvious that it was the dressmaker,” you said amused, raising and lowering your eyebrows.

“You see? She thinks she's Miss Marple,” Angie said, pointing at you mockingly. “It was the detective.”

“I don't want to spoil the ending,” Donna said with a tender smile, pinching your cheek. “But (Y/N) is right… it was the dressmaker,” she whispered, making you protest with a sigh.

“Eh, thank you very much,” you said closing the book. “But well, I was right after all,” you said, looking at Angie in a satisfied way, making her grunt.

“I'm sorry, I'm not as discreet as I thought,” your fiancée apologized, shaking her head. “Mm, but you had barely started reading it,” she commented curiously. “How did you know?”

“The clues were too clear,” you said with a petulant tone. “It might seem like a setup, something so obvious it couldn’t be true, but you know, I’m good at crime.”

Donna laughed, giving you a soft kiss on the lips, to which Angie protested with a disgusted grunt, making you both laugh cutely as you separated.

“Mm, detective stories are fine, but I think you could start with something a little more serious,” Donna commented, standing up towards a bookshelf.

You nodded curiously, picking up the bulky book the lady handed you.

“Crime and Punishment, Fyodor Dos… Do… Dostres…” you read, frowning at the author’s complicated last name.

“Fyodor Dostoyevsky,” Donna corrected in a friendly tone, to which you arched, nodding absentmindedly. “If you like crime, I think you might be interested.”

“It seems… broad,” you whispered, flipping through the old pages. “Is it funny?”

“Well, depending on how you look at it,” Donna said, with an elegant smile. “It goes deep into the thoughts of a man who wants to commit murder, his conscience, his fears…”

“Oh,” you said disinterestedly, frowning. “But there are unsolved crimes?”

“Read it, it's worth it,” your girlfriend told you, patting you on the shoulder. “I think I'll be a little more boring,” she murmured amused, picking up another book and walking towards the entrance. “I'll put on some music, taking advantage of the fact that my future wife has fixed the record player…”

“I love you,” you whispered confidently, blowing her a kiss in the air.

The atmosphere was calm. Classical music was playing to give even more serenity to the room, but that didn't necessarily have to be a good thing. As you read that complicated book, accompanied by the soft chords of Donna's favorite music, your eyelids seemed affected by gravity.

Yes, you liked detective novels, and you were downright good at guessing the culprit before they revealed themselves, but the book Donna gave you was much more complicated than that and the words jumbled around in your brain.

You liked reading, of course, but you liked to something much lighter, not something that was undoubtedly, inducing you to sleep.

“(Y/N),” Donna said, nudging you slightly. “Are you falling asleep?”

“What?” you asked with a hoarse voice giving away the correct answer, settling down on the couch “No, no, it's... interesting.”

“Honey, your eyes are closing,” she said amused while you maintained a proud pose. “You don't like the book?”

“Oh, yes, yes, it's very entertaining,” you lied, feeling a familiar pang in your chest, an embarrassed blush appearing on your cheeks.

It wasn't the first time it happened. Donna Beneviento, contrary to what was often said in the village, wasn’t just a madwoman. She was a terribly cultured and intelligent woman, and you loved that about her.

But sometimes, just sometimes, you felt that her intelligence was far superior to yours, that somehow, you were a little more… normal. Of course, you ignored all these senseless paranoia, but, from time to time, they came back to haunt you.

You didn't want to seem like an uncultured girl, or uninterested in complicated subjects like art, history or philosophy. You had long since begun to pretend that you weren't so bored by a complicated reading or the soft melody of a work composed centuries ago.

 You didn't know what Donna would think if she knew that all of that made you sleepy, you didn't want her to think that you were inferior to her, in any way.

“It's this music, it's making me sleepy,” you said yawning and looking for an excuse for your sudden sleep.

“Oh, I thought you liked classical music,” Donna said, looking at you curiously.

“Yes, and I like it…” you lied, getting up from the couch to clear your head. “But I'd prefer something more… lively.”

“Okay,” Donna nodded, getting up to the record player and stopping that soporific melody. “What do you want?”

“Oh, no, no, no not on that old thing,” you said amused, walking towards an old music player you bought from the Duke and that you fixed yourself. “Now it's my turn.”

“Um, (Y/N)…” the lady said, playing with her hands while you manipulated your record collection.

“Let's see, let's see…” you murmured, feeling Angie climbing up your body.

“This one, this one!” the doll squealed, pointing to one of your favorite records.

“Isn't it a bit old?” you asked with the box in your hand. “Well, it could be considered classical music, don't you think, honey?” you said to the lady, handing her the CD, as she looked at it curiously.

“Spi… Spice…” the lady murmured, looking at the cover.

“Spice Girls, honey, a classic,” you corrected with a smug smile. “This sure lifts my spirits.”

“A classic? It says here that it's from 1996,” Donna protested, frowning as you snatched the box from her, putting the CD in the player. “You could say that it was just yesterday, (Y/N).”

“It's been over 20 years, Donna, so it's classical music,” you joked again, pressing the button. “Hey, Angie, I think you know the first song…”

“Yo, I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want!” Angie sang as the music started playing, jumping up and down on the floor.

“So tell me what you want, what you really, really want,” you continued, high-fiving the doll, the only one who seemed happy with your choice.

Donna stood with a frown, gently lowering the volume on the player as you sat back down on the couch.

“Ah, much better,” you commented, picking up the book again and looking at the lady over it. “Hey, honey, aren’t you coming?”

“How can you read with this music? It’s impossible,” she said in a slightly childish tone.  “Cos’è questo?”

“Music, dolcezza,” you said ironically, shaking your head. “I would have liked to play something more recent, but lately the Duke is short of contraband material.”

“No wonder. This is horrible, they don't even know how to sing,” the lady said, crossing her arms as the music seemed to destroy her ears.

“Donna…” you sighed, rolling your eyes and moving a leg to the rhythm of the music. “Stop complaining and come here.”

“You can't even dance to this,” she protested again, approaching you and glancing sideways at the stereo. “Is this really music?”

“Angie knows how to dance to it,” you said amused, pointing at the doll with your head, a doll that moved to the rhythm of that catchy song.

“Mm,” Donna murmured, letting you sit her down with a quick movement. “No, I can't.”

“Donna, stop fooling around,” you said with a hiss, shaking your head. “You always choose the music.”

“Forgive me for preferring a soft melody with perfectly ordered chords and notes to the screamers of hell,” she protested, getting up again. “This has nothing to do with the true meaning of music. It’s not elegant, they just seem like stupid brainless girls.”

“Maybe they are, but it's cool,” you said distractedly, scratching your hair to try to concentrate on the heavy reading. “Hey, where are you going?”

“To the basement, it's impossible to concentrate here,” the lady explained, disappearing among murmurs in Italian that you initially didn't give importance to.

“As you wish,” you sighed, glancing sideways at the player.

Naturally, Lady Beneviento and you came from very different times. Education, culture, everything was distant, but normally your two worlds coexisted in harmony, like those melodies she liked so much.

However, since you got engaged, you tried to take better care of those kinds of details. You knew Donna loved you. She was the one who wanted to take you as her wife so she would never lose you, but sometimes you wondered if she really bothered to really get to know you.

You didn't know what to do, whether to give in, show yourself as you really were, or pretend a little more. The idea that Donna saw that you were nothing but an ordinary girl with ordinary tastes was disturbing. She was intelligent, complicated, cultured, and you were just a country girl who enjoyed the little things in life, who didn't even bother to wonder about the origin of her existence.

You felt somewhat insecure as the days went by, unable to get along with her refined tastes, with the readings that she was passionate about. Of course none of that seemed like a problem, and maybe you were giving it much more importance than it had, but the expression of weariness, of discomfort with your simple tastes made you see you were wrong.

Donna was a wonderful woman and you were just a simple village girl, would she really still love you when she realized you weren't as cultured as she was?

The question terrified you; it made you stay up at night, it made you change, it made you carefully pretend that you were starting to be interested in such boring things. Being who you weren't wasn’t your favorite way to deal with the problem, but, with a month to go before the wedding your nerves made you make impulsive decisions.

You wanted to make her see that you were just like her, that everything she liked was also your passion. It really was hard, but you managed to fool her for a while, thinking that maybe that way, you would never disappoint her.

How ironic, you were trying to make the lady in black, the disturbed Donna Beneviento, the same one who feared so terribly to lose you, not to leave you.

“What are you doing, tesoro?” the lady asked when she finished with her dolls, finding an almost comical scene in front of her.

“Reading,” you said amused, holding the heavy book while letting the lady kiss your forehead affectionately. “Oh, and you were right, that music of yours is much more relaxing,” you commented satisfied, with the classical chords in the background.

“Mm, well,” Donna said, nodding, resting her head on your shoulder. “What do you think of the book?”

“It's good,” you answered with a fake smile, full of the wisdom you obviously lacked.

“I'm glad,” she sighed, frowning and picking up a cup that was on the table. “Did you drink a whole cup of coffee?”

“Yes, I needed to cheer myself up,” you said, downplaying that slight caffeine overdose. “Maybe I went a little too far.”

“The coffee pot was empty, did you drink it all?” Donna asked, taking your shaking hands. “(Y/N), so much coffee is not good for you.”

“Do you know what's not good?” you asked, closing the book and sensually climbing up the lady's body, with a seductive purr. “Having you so close to me, making my heart beat wildly...”

“That's because of the coffee,” she joked, caressing your legs, which rested on either side of her hips. “Mm, tesoro...”

“Shh, Angie's not here,” you murmured, biting her earlobe. “How about having fun?”

“Sounds good to me,” the brunette sighed, giving herself to your eager lips, moving your body with hers in an erotic dance, anticipating a pleasant afternoon of passion.

“Make me yours, my wife,” you whispered, slowly unbuttoning her dress, abruptly interrupted by the agonizing ringing of the phone. “Oh, it just can't be…”

“Don't pay attention,” Donna said, laughing amused, caught by your desire to love, by the desire to make you hers like only she knew how. “It will stop ringing soon… “

“No, I…” you said, getting off her body with a look of resignation. “You should pick it up, maybe it's Mother Miranda. Don't worry, I'll be waiting.”

Donna nodded, kissing you quickly and getting up with a nervous gasp, taking the phone while you seduced her by getting comfortable on the sofa and biting your lower lip.

“Pronto,” the lady sighed. “Oh, Alcina… yes, well, actually… Oh, well I don’t… Yes, I think it’s a good idea… sure, of course she’ll come, see you later, ciao…”

“Mm?” you murmured with some disappointment when you saw Donna turning back to you while fastening the buttons again. “Alcina?”

“Yes…” she sighed, also frustrated. “She says she wants us to go to the castle for tea.”

“Have you said yes? Donna… I wanted to make love,” you protested, pouting. “Come on, if we hurry we can…”

“Alcina says she has something for us, you know, for the wedding, it’s not right to reject her kindness,” the lady explained, shaking her head. “It’ll just be tea, tesoro, we won’t be long.”

“Well, okay,” you said, defeated. “You are always so polite…”

“I wouldn't want to disappoint the only family I have left,” Donna commented, with a sad tone. “I'm going to get the veil, oh and… get dressed,” she whispered amused, pointing at the underwear that you yourself pulled down to make her more nervous. “You will make me lose my mind.”

“Mm,” you murmured, stealing a seductive kiss from her. “You owe me one, my wife…”

Of course, the best thing about the trips to the castle was the journey itself. Angie made fun of you as you walked hand in hand through the forest, in silence, enjoying the contact of your skin, the tranquility of a life that would only get better.

Alcina Dimitrescu was the eldest of the Lords, and her attitude and behavior were even more refined than the lady in black’s. Her seductive voice, her glances and the conversations that always traveled between art and wine weren’t your perfect plan to spend an afternoon like that, but you couldn't complain, you knew that Donna cared about her.

“Here it is, my dears... it really is hard for me to part with this jewel, but I feel calm knowing that you and your future wife will have it,” the lady of the castle said, pointing to a small painting.

“Wow... it's impressive,” the Angie doll said, shyly approaching the painting. “Picasso?”

“Picasso,” Alcina answered as Donna tilted her head to better observe it. “It's one of my favorite pieces. You know that during the second world war the looting of works of art was pretty common. Poor stupid soldiers, they thought that this place would be ideal to hide it…”

“Was it from some soldiers?” you asked, trying to make sense of that work of art that seemed to fascinate your fiancée. “Wow, I'm sure it's a mind-blowing story.”

“Mm, the story of how it got here is unimportant, dear. Don't you know what you have in front of you?” the lady in white asked, running a hand over your shoulders. “It's real art.”

“Yes, well,” you said with a frown, confused. “To me it looks like some badly done doodles,” you commented by mistake, making the tall woman gasp with irony.

“Doodles?” Alcina asked, while Donna controlled the doll's impulses to touch the painting. “How can you say that?”

“It's what I see,” you murmured, trying to make sense of those messy figures. “Is this really art?”

“Donna, dear,” Alcina said, ignoring your comment and drawing the doll maker's attention. “Your fiancée doesn't seem pleased by my gift.”

“Perché?” your girlfriend whispered, approaching you. “Don’t you like it?”

“Like isn't exactly the word,” you commented, getting a little closer to the painting. “Was that Picasso guy really that important?”

“Well… he really was,” Donna murmured, looking at you and then at the doodles. “It's abstract art, (Y/N), it doesn't have to make sense.”

“Oh,” you said, nodding. “Well, I guess it's okay…”

“But dear, don't you know anything?” Alcina asked, coming closer again. “I see that your knowledge of art is not at all exhaustive.”

“The truth is that I’m not very interested in art,” you confessed with a shy smile. “I don’t understand it and…”

“That’s obvious,” Alcina joked, laughing sinisterly. “Well, it’s not that important, I’m convinced that you have other… virtues.”

“What do you mean?” you asked, a little annoyed by the comment, nervous.

“Oh, nothing, little bird, I’m just saying that Donna has surely seen other things in you,” the lady said, looking at you with bright eyes and a mocking smile. “Mm, I can imagine what kind of things, my dear.”

“Hey, Alcina!” Angie protested. “Stop flirting with my Donna's fiancée.”

“Please…” the lady in white sighed, making Donna suddenly tense up, starting to suffer another attack of jealousy. “She may be beautiful but… well, beauty isn't everything.”

“Um, yes, we better go,” the lady in black said, uncomfortable, just like you, who lowered your head, starting to think about your insecurities again. “We're taking the painting.”

“Oh, no, no, dear,” said Alcina, looking at you out of the corner of her eye with a regretful expression, surely noticing your sadness. “Mother Miranda told me that there are some loose lycans around, it will be better if I send it to your house when that uncomfortable matter is solved.”

“Va bene,” your girlfriend nodded, taking your hand and observing you cautiously. “(Y/N), tutto bene?”

“Um, yes, yes I… I would like to go home,” you said with a broken voice, with your bad thoughts eclipsing your reasoning.

“Of course, um… Thank you Alcina,” Donna said, pulling your hand towards the exit of the castle.

“Little bird…” the vampire interrupted. “I hope I haven't offended you.”

You didn't answer. You looked away and continued walking. There was no more laughter, no more holding hands on the way back.

Your ignorance was something you always tried to hide, something that was natural to you and that seemed to be of no importance to Donna, but after that unpleasant visit to the castle, everything in your mind changed.

Donna Beneviento was a cultured, intelligent woman, passionate about art, and you were a simple villager, a lover of crime novels, short stories that were easy to read. You weren't on her level, no matter how much you tried to pretend otherwise.

As you walked home, you thought about the near future, about what your life would be like after marriage. You loved Donna, you loved her just the way she was, you loved her mind, her intelligence… but she… what was it that she loved about you?

You weren't sure of the answer and your nerves began to tense. You could pretend for a year, two, but no more. You weren't the intelligent and cultured girl that Donna deserved, you were simply nothing compared to her; you had nothing to offer her.

“I'll make dinner, tesoro,” the lady commented when you were back home, taking off her veil with a tender smile. “Hey, amore mio, what's wrong?”

“Donna, I…” you murmured with a sad sigh. “What did you see in me?”

“Cosa? What's that question about?” she asked, frowning. “Oh, you didn't take what my sister said seriously, did you?”

“How can you expect me not to take it seriously? She's right, I'm stupid,” you growled, clenching your fists. “Donna, stop pretending.”

“Pretend? Um, tesoro, I don't know what you're talking about... I told you not to drink so much coffee,” the lady said worriedly, cupping your face in her hands.

You pulled away with a furious gasp, shaking your head.

“It's not the coffee!” you screamed, releasing a pressure in your chest that was already unbearable. “It's not about that Donna, it's about me, about us.”

“(Y/N), you're scaring me...” she sighed, grabbing you by the shoulders. “Calm down, please.”

“No Donna, I'm not calming down... Why? Huh? Why me? Are you so desperate that you'll settle for any stupid girl who's capable of having children? Is that what you want from me? Then what, huh? You'll kick me out of your life because I'm not what you're looking for…”

“You're delirious, I don't know what's wrong with you,” Donna said, very nervous, shaking her head. “Why do you say such horrible things?”

“They're not horrible things, it's reality,” you hissed, pointing at your fiancée in an unpleasant way. “Donna, I hate classical music, Crime and Punishment is a boring book and I have no interest in art…”

“(Y/N), but,” she interrupted, desperate to get you to come back to your senses. “Tesoro…”

“Disappointed? I assumed so…” you whispered with a dark look while Donna was speechless, just shaking her head. “This is me, a stupid and ignorant girl who gets bored with everything you like.”

“That's not bad at all. I don't…” she said, with a marked accent that betrayed her nervousness. “…I don't care about that.”

“You say that now, but…” you said, laughing nervously. “You'll realize that we're from different worlds, that I'm of no use to you and you know what? I should have realized it sooner.”

“(Y/N)…”

“No, Donna,” you said, sobbing and shaking your head. “I'm tired of pretending that I deserve to have your last name when it's not true. You're a wonderful woman, the most wonderful woman I've ever met in my life, but I'm not, I have nothing to offer you…”

“S-Stop… stop… Stop talking nonsense!” Donna shrieked, furious, unable to control her nerves. “What's this about? What have I done wrong? Why do you say those things?”

“You know I'm right,” you hissed, with a much darker voice, glancing sideways at the shiny ring that decorated your finger. “Now you love me, but soon you'll realize that you've wasted your time with me. I'm not what you deserve; I'm not what you're looking for, Donna.”

“How do you know what I'm looking for?” she asked, grabbing your arm. “Why are you torturing me!?”

“Donna, you’re hurting me,” you protested, breaking away from her grip, watching as the lady slowly lost her mind. “It doesn't make any sense for you to get like that when you know it's true.

“It's not true!” she shrieked, kicking childishly. “(Y/N), don't you dare…!”

“Shh, that's it,” you whispered with your voice broken by crying, approaching her cautiously. “Donna, this can't go on like this, I don't want to ruin your life.”

“Ruin my life? P-Please, let's talk things over, you're not thinking clearly,” Donna said, grabbing your hand again, breathing heavily.

“No, honey, no…” you whispered, caressing her hand and bringing the other to the ring, slowly taking it off your finger. “I'll never be able to think clearly.”

“What are you doing? Why…?” Donna asked, looking at the ring already off your finger, a ring you placed in the palm of her hand, closing her fist over it.

“It's okay, I know when to back off,” you sobbed, clenching her fist. “You should give this to a woman who is better than me, a smart girl like you, who deserves to wear it.”

“(Y/N), il tuo anello… put it on, per favore,” she whispered nervously, playing with the jewel, grabbing your hand tightly. “Per favore! Don't do this to me!”

“I'm sorry, darling,” you said with a sore throat, returning the ring to her hand, squeezing it tighter. “I don't deserve you, you should find someone who does.”

“No, no, wait, wait,” the lady said, pulling your wrist as you prepared to leave the mansion. “No…”

“Goodbye, Donna,” you sobbed before turning around and running to the exit, leaving the lady in black paralyzed, dropping the ring, which bounced on the floor.

“What are you doing, silly Donna!? She's leaving, do something!” Angie shrieked, pulling at her dress.

Donna didn't move, she was just sobbing in shock, motionless.

You looked at her one last time and opened the door, leaving her life forever.

“Donna, Donna! You can't let her go! Donna, react!” Angie continued, while her voice became more and more imperceptible. “The lycans, Donna, the lycans…!”

Her screams were barely whispers as you ran through the dark forest, crying panting, having made the hardest decision of your life. No, Donna didn't deserve you, she didn't deserve a brainless girl like you, you would only make her unhappy. You were completely convinced.

The tiredness made you relax your steps, panting and screaming desperately. You had lost the love of your life, and it wasn't because of something you had done, but because of who you really were. She could never love you. She could never love a stupid girl like you, even if she forced herself to do so.

A sinister roar brought your consciousness back for a moment. The place was terribly dark and you lost your bearings. Going back wasn’t an option, but you didn't know what was in front of you, which was the right way after leave the elevator.

“I'm so stupid that I don't even know where...” you lamented, walking until you collided with something hairy, with a horrible creature that made you trip.

Normally, lycans didn't roam the territories of the Lords, but you soon remembered Alcina's warning about some rebellious beasts that escaped Miranda's control.

Your arm hurt and the moisture on your clothes told you that you were bleeding, but that wasn't the worst part, the worst part was seeing how that beast raised its claws before you to tear you apart, giving a pathetic end to your pathetic life.

“Stop!” a voice behind you said, causing the beast to obey and back away in fear.

The dim light of the place illuminated the silhouette of the lady in black, who was slowly approaching, terrifying the lycan just by her mere presence.

“Fuori…” Donna hissed, making the creature whimper, forcing it to protect itself with its claws. “Get out of here!”

The lycan fled, and the lady crouched down next to you, checking your condition.

“(Y/N), parlami, per favore… where did it hurt you?” she asked, being pushed unpleasantly by you, getting up on your own.

“Donna, I'm… I'm fine,” you said, grabbing your injured arm. “I… er… thank you.”

“Amore mio, you're bleeding,” Donna said, holding your arm and taking a look at your wounds. “Come, I have to…”

“No,” you said coldly. “You don't need to take care of me, not anymore,” you said, giving in to crying again, inevitably throwing yourself into her arms. “Donna…”

“Shh, you're very nervous, tesoro, come, let's go home and… I'll heal you and…” she stammered, crying, but keeping her composure better.

Silence. That was the word that best defined that moment. While Donna healed you, you sobbed under her watchful gaze, unable to say anything, unable to stop feeling at ease in what until a while ago, was your home.

“Perché? Perché, (Y/N)?” the lady murmured, wiping the blood from your arm, looking away from you.

“Donna, I've already explained my reasons,” you murmured distractedly, not wanting to go back. “Thank you for healing me, but I'll leave as soon as you do.”

“You can't…” she sighed, closing her eye to keep calm. “You can't just leave like that, without giving me a reason. You’re breaking my heart…”

“I'm sorry, but it's for the best, I love you too much to let you waste your time on me,” you said with a broken voice, but firm in some way. “Donna I... I'm not like you. You're a cultured, intelligent woman and I... I'm just a stupid village girl who likes to listen to stupid songs and read books that could be for children. I'm not what you think.”

“But you are what I want,” she murmured, bandaging your wound delicately. “Do you really think I want a pedantic girl like my sister by my side? No, (Y/N)…”

“It's what you deserve,” you sobbed again, pulling your arm away.

“You're just talking nonsense, (Y/N), I love you just the way you are. I would never pretend to change you, I... (Y/N), tesoro, you have to believe me. I'm not looking for anything because I've already found it, I've found you…” Donna sighed, lifting your chin. “You are the love of my life, the one I want to be my wife, my family.”

“You've chosen wrong,” you said with a nervous laugh, shaking your head. “I'm just a stupid girl.”

“You're wrong, (Y/N),” the lady hissed, darkening her gaze. “Do you think a person's intelligence is measured by their knowledge of art or literature? No, tesoro…”

“Well, but…”

“No, now you're going to listen to me. You're not stupid. Just, just look at everything you've done during all this time. I would never have been able to fix the record player, or the projector… (Y/N), you bought the Duke a broken device and fixed it, you made it work again as it were magic…”

“Not that…”

“Taci,” she interrupted, with a brusque tone, cupping your face in her hands. “You are capable of much more than you think, of things that I would never be capable of, never… You say you are stupid for not knowing anything about art, for considering a complicated book boring, but that’s not true.”

“Donna, I…” you tried to say, silenced by a finger on your lips.

“Amore mio, you are intelligent, much more than me in many ways. You are funny, decisive and have an amazing capacity for deduction, or do you forget that you never finish any of your detective stories?”

“Well, that’s because…” you explained somewhat confused, relaxing the demons that were hovering in your mind.

“Because you know the ending before reading it. That is intelligent, tesoro, those are your abilities, just because they are not the same as mine doesn’t mean they are insignificant,” she said, with a desperate smile, trying to make you reason, starting to achieve it. “I fell in love with you just the way you are, I love you just the way you are…”

“But Donna, I…” you protested unsurely, beginning to give in to her pleasant words. “I don't think that… that I can contribute anything, I…”

“(Y/N), you are the missing part of my boring existence, you are that joy that lights up my life. Please, don't abandon me because without you… without you, art would cease to be…”

“That's very nice,” you said while blushing, letting be guided by her hand until her lips rested on yours with a soft and salty kiss, an intense, deep love kiss…

“Hey, hey, hey!” interrupted Angie, comically separating you by giving something to Donna, something that made her look at you sadly. “You dropped this, silly Donna, why don't you put it back in its place?”

She sighed, looking at the ring Angie gave her and gently grabbing your hand.

“(Y/N), sposami…” she asked in a soft voice. “Don't leave me alone, don't let me get lost without you because… because without you I'm nothing…”

“Donna…” you said, letting the ring slide back down your finger, starting to get rid of the bad thoughts in your mind, realizing that deep down you knew she was right, that intelligence wasn't measured by tastes, but by many other things.

“Donna, I love you… of course I'll marry you…”

[jelzorz]

192.

In the years after the war, after Aaravos, after the castle is rebuilt and feels like home again, Soren finds time in the peace to do... well. Nothing. There are always diplomatic missions and there's always security to check, but the peacetime is stable and surprisingly stubborn, and even when there are skirmishes in the surrounding towns or at the border—which is barely a border at all, these days—they're never big enough to cause any real trouble, and life slows like the sun in the summer months, quiet and calm and sleepy in a way he's never known.

This is what spurns him back into poetry. Dragon Smash Boy was silly, but so was he, in those days, and now that there's time, well. Why not? He doesn't have to be good at it to enjoy it, and he'll never be good at it if he doesn't try at all. Very secretly, he's always liked the skill in it, the ability to say something meaningful and beautiful in something short and sweet, and maybe one day, in the distant future, people will go back to the books and find his there, proof that he's more than just muscle and brawn.

It seems silly. Or maybe his father just made him think anything outside of the box he'd been put in was silly. He's done enough work to know he still carries the weight of his childhood with him, even after all the baggage he's already put down. Those days have long past. He can dream if he wants.

So he goes to the library and pulls down book after book after book. He studies the prose and the description, the weird places poets pause for effect, the metaphor and the assonance and the rhyme, and then he tries to write his own but... It never feels quite right. It always feels a little forced, a little ingenuine, lacking in the honesty of the poems he decides he likes best.

"I don't get it," he muses one day. He is lounging by a window in the library with a book lying open on the desk before him. This one is a recommendation from Callum: Even the Deepest Night is Lit by Stars by Damian Something-or-other. He'd had something wistful in his eyes when he gave Soren the title and Soren had had to know. "All of these are like... beautiful and mine are so..." He grimaces and shoves the book back just as Opeli appears from behind a stack with a pile of books in her arms.

She raises an eyebrow at him. "Can I ask what you're agonizing over?"

Soren glances up and chuckles sheepishly, his cheeks the slightest bit warm. "I'm—uh—trying to learn how to write poems," he admits. "It's... not as easy as everyone makes it sound. Let me take those." He gets up and takes the books from her arms without waiting for an answer and Opeli smiles her thanks.

"The best poems aren't," she says, as she leads him through the shelves to where they belong. "The best are the ones that are hardest to write."

"What do you mean?"

Opeli purses her lips as she starts removing books from his arms. "Art is about expression," she says after a moment. "And sometimes the most beautiful art is art that expresses something the artist can't otherwise express. It's putting a feeling on display and showing an audience where the artist is most vulnerable. It's no easy task."

Soren blinks at her. "It's about... being vulnerable?"

"It's about being honest," says Opeli with a wry smile, "to yourself about yourself. It's about expressing the things that feel too big for your heart to manage."

"You make it sound like those counselling sessions we used to have."

"It is, in a way," chuckles Opeli. "Those were a way for you express your feelings too. Poetry is not so different. You simply tell the world what you're feeling instead of me."

"Oh."

Oh indeed. Soren thinks about the things he told her, the tears he shed, and suddenly poetry feels a lot scarier as a concept. To be that honest, that vulnerable—in words that anyone in the world might see or hear? He likes to think that he's brave but that feels like something else entirely.

But he tries. He thinks about it late at night and in the early mornings. He writes it all down in flowery words and metaphors. Then, about a month later, he presents it to the council.

"It's hard to see in darkness when there's nothing there to see, When you turn, is it still dark? Or is the nothing me? Am I so small the shadows feel like neverending night? Or do you just think you're big enough to block out all the light? I'm older now and wiser and I still stumble through dark, But now the sun is rising, and I hear the singing lark. It doesn't feel so cold now and the morning looks so bright. Maybe I'm not nothing. Maybe I'm the light."

The council stares at him. Ezran drops his jelly tart and Callum looks like Soren might as well have hit him over the head with the butt of his sword.

"Was it bad?"

"Bad?" Rayla looks aghast. "Soren, that was amazing! How? When? How long have you been working on that?"

"Oh, um." Soren flushes a little and rubs awkwardly at the back of his neck. "A few weeks. It was okay?"

"Better than okay!" says Ez.

"It was actually really good," agrees Callum almost breathlessly. "Like. Really good. Great job!"

It's a better response than he ever though he would get, and Soren grins and bows, pleased to have something that he's finally happy with that actually passes as a real poem. The rest of the meeting passes quickly, and he spends it in a state of giddiness, of pride, before it ends and the others file out. Opeli is the last to leave, as always, and Soren hangs back, curious to know what she thinks. It was her advice he followed after all.

"Did you think it was okay?"

"I have a question for you first," she says, piling her paperwork into her arms. She looks him right in the eye, and Soren takes a breath, waiting for the critique--but instead, she asks--

"Are you okay?"

Of course. Soren glances away, a rueful smile tugging at his lips. "I mean. You said to be honest."

"You were," says Opeli. "I don't think anyone else realized it though."

"Yeah, well." Soren snorts to himself. He doesn't blame them, but it's not surprising. "They don't notice anything outside of them, do they?"

Opeli scoffs. "Unfortunate, but true." She studies him for a moment, blue-grey eyes too knowing to avoid. "There is no darkness that can extinguish light," she says after a moment, "and the Sun is the brightest light of all."

He laughs then, flattered by the metaphor (he thinks). "Are you a poet too?"

She smirks. "Perhaps," she teases. "It's scripture. But if you want my honest opinion, I thought it was beautiful."

"Really?"

"Really. You have every right to be proud."

"I am," grins Soren, and for the first time, he lets himself believe that maybe the dream of being a poet isn't so silly after all.

[yuri-is-online]

Hi hi, Can you please to prompt 4 with Malleus,Vil, and Riddle?

4. You met someone really wonderful at the Masquerade Ball and have been ranting about how he was totally the love of your life to your abnormally quiet friend. Actually wasn't he invited too? Maybe you should ask him how that went.

Hello hello and of course I can, and I agree with the first ask you sent me. I was not really thinking of Malleus specifically when I wrote that prompt but it really does suit him doesn't it?

Oh also, welcome to the hell site. I noticed you're new from the few asks you sent me (I was so confused as to how a blank blog was talking to me), I hope you have fun with the content on here. New people are always welcome with me, I know all about being shy and uncertain of how to interact with people. I'll answer the other Malleus prompt you sent in after I have done some others, it was my bad for not realizing you were the same person haha.

notes: they/them used for Yuu, full shojo manga lack of self awareness here in Malleus's part (it is implied to take place before the Ch. 6 reveal), just don't think about it is Yuu's middle name. The rest of the requests can be found on my masterlist here.

Malleus

"Tsunotarou, you know a lot about gargoyles, right?" Such a foolish yet welcome question. Truly your unawareness of just who you are conversing with never ceases to amaze and infatuate him.

"Of course, I am something of an expert." He smiles, trying to keep it from showing the whites of his teeth.

"Oh well then you must be very happy to be in Diasomnia." Your eyes are sparkling, and he pauses. Yes he is very happy to be in Diasomnia, but not for the gargoyles. Briar Valley has long respected the legacy of the Thorn Fairy, and what better house could there be for the noblest of nobles than one that's very core is the spirit of nobility? But these are not exactly things he wishes to speak with you about, it would require detailed revelations he fears the consequences of.

"And what makes you think that, child of man?" Still there must be cause for your reasoning, and he does wish to hear it.

"Well your housewarden is one, isn't he?" You seem very pleased with yourself, but your mind is clearly very far away. Malleus stares at you, eyes wide in shock as he attempts to piece together what logic might have drawn you to such a conclusion. "I met him last night." Your dreamy sigh fills him with jealousy, just irrational enough that the thunder crack above you is quite small enough that he can convince you to remain outside of Ramshackle in conversation with him.

"Your mask is really impressive!" Your eyes always shone at the simplest displays of magic, it filled Malleus with a joy he could never quite find his fill of.

"Mask?!" Roars Sebek, his volume matching the pride rapidly feeling Malleus's chest. "Foolish human, this is more than a mere mask! This is a display of my lord's skill! A perfect recreation of old Briar Valley Masquerade tradition! His artistic talent has been woven though magic to bear his true face for the world to see-"

"That's quite enough Sebek." He does enjoy his retainers praise, but he has a task in mind that the over excited boy might- no will definitely endanger if he speaks further.

"But my lord!" Poor Sebek is torn between embarrassment, jelousy, and concern as he watches his precious lord observe you in the same manner one might a particularly expensive jewel.

"They have given me a most treasured compliment and I wish to reward them in turn." He bows, making sure to flourish his hand as he extends it, taking great pleasure in the little shudder that he only sees unaccompanied by fear in you. "May I have this dance, prefect?"

"Y-yes. You may." You seem in a daze as he takes you to the floor, just as unaware of the others around you as he is. It's wonderful, no matter how many times he visits you he has never had such a good excuse to hold you as this. Your scent, the weight of you in his arms, the way he can better familiarize himself with the subtle movements of your face is all much more real and overwhelming than he had ever imagined it being. It's all Lilia can do to drag him away, whispering teasing things about impropriety and duty to soothe the storm at his fingertips as he sees your friends scoop you up where he left off.

"He is a very handsome gargoyle. And so polite! But then I guess he is royalty so that makes sense..." The continued thunder has you inviting him in, mentioning something about tea he really can't be bothered to think about.

"No he isn't." Malleus pouts. "The nobility of Briar Valley has a reputation for being extremely dour and irrational."

"Oh. Well no wonder he seemed so happy I danced with him. Poor fellow must be very lonely." Oh if only you knew.

"Enough about my housewarden." Malleus declares without a hint of irony, bowing in a familiar fashion to prevent you from entering your kitchen. "He isn't the one you are talking to now is he? He isn't the one who you will be thinking about when you dream tonight." In a slight daze you take his hand, the living room fills with green fireflies as the storm outside slows to a halt as kinder, not softer emotions fill the young lord's heart. "He isn't the one your last dance is for, so focus on me, won't you?"

Vil

"This is why I told you to make sure whatever costume Crewel gave you came with a coat." Vil is beyond angry, with you certainly, but mostly at- life? The fact humans have an immune system that doesn't always work? You have no clue and your head is much too stuffed up to care. What you do care about is that Vil is here, and he really shouldn't be. Colds are contagious and Vil has so many things that he should be doing other than fussing over someone who is not in his dorm and not his responsibility.

"You could get sick." You say and he laughs, if you could see him, if he was not sat behind you on a bed in one of Pomefiore's empty rooms, you know the look he would have on his face. You would see his stupidly beautiful smug smile he has when he has something particularly cutting to say; instead you have to close your eyes and picture it as he pats your head dry just a bit more forcefully.

"Not my responsibility you say? You certainly seem to have a funny view of this." Vil has a word on the tip of his tongue. A word that's ambiguous, a word that would make his manager have a fit. If only she had been a fly on the wall during the Masquerade last night.

"My my, you seem a bit out of place." The tall stranger must be confused at your staring, but he seems more amused than offended. "Does my costume enchant you that much?"

"It reminded me of something." It would hard enough to explain to a friend what you are thinking of, harder still to a stranger. The scarlet costume could have been taken from a playbill, you find yourself looking him over for any sign of a folio. You highly doubt it's you the Red Death wants to capture tonight, but you cannot say you will protest too loudly if that's what he decides. "Sorry if I made you uncomfortable."

"Quite the opposite," the stranger does not ask you to dance, merely extends his hand and gracefully leads you off to the side when you take it, "so long as you praise me out loud you can look as long as you like."

"It's not like you got me sick." You sneeze into your tissue and Vil frowns, satisfied with your care but not with your answer. He had his suspicions that you may have made a... mistake in your assessment of your time at the Masquerade. But it did hurt him slightly to think that you did not know his essence well enough to have recognized him at once. "And I did get a costume with a cloak, I just gave it to the Red Death because it was too weird to see him without it."

"Mhmm I don't know." you say. It's such a shame Vil can only see your lips, he loves it when you tease him so much already it isn't fair he has to focus on something so tauntingly close and yet so far out of reach. "I think your costume is incomplete."

"Oh?" Vil makes sure to hold you close to him as the song ends, daring anyone to come close enough to try and steal your attention so he can laugh at the attempt. "What's your reasoning for that? Depending on what you have to say, I just might agree." You back out of his arms and make a frame with your fingers. "Kiss me." He begs silently. "Kiss me and leave a mark." But instead you unwind your cloak and fix it to his shoulder.

"Perfect. Now you really look like the portrait." And to his great despair you are gone.

Despite your earlier stated worries, you fall back into Vil's chest, tilting your back to look up at him. "When I'm not sick remind me to tell you about the Phantom of the Opera? I wanted to spend more time dancing with him, but I was feeling too much at home and got scared he'd vanish." Vil's eyes shine with a strangely familiar light, and he gently guides you under the bed's covers. Just before he leaves he kisses your forehead so gently it's all you can do not to cry.

"I think your phantom might be closer than you think." He murmurs against your skin and leaves you to sleep, tucking you under a mysteriously familiar red cloak as soon as your eyes are well and truly closed.

Riddle

"You will be too tired to do anything after the ball, so make sure to shower and go directly to bed."

It was good advice based off of a reasonable assumption, and technically you were not in fact physically doing anything. You were also quite tired, you had expected to spend most of the ball on the outskirts observing the display of feathers and paints but that was far from what actually happened. You don't think you had ever danced in your life as much as you had in the past six hours. It would be extremely reasonable to assume that after scrubbing yourself free of makeup and sweat you would be down for the count.

But you weren't. Your mind was running a mile a minute, eyes constantly glancing at your phone on your nightstand. It's an odd feeling, wanting to call someone and not being able to. It is also a feeling you have become deeply familiar with, the ache it produces might as well be permanently woven into your heart, you should be immune to the pain at this point.

This time though, this time the person you want to call could theoretically be within reach. This person was someone you could touch, someone you could hold, someone whose touch still lingered against your hands.

The little knight was just as awkward as you were, if he didn't immediately stutter out a protest you would have thought he was just as inexperienced with the whole formal party thing as you were.

"I know what I'm doing I just-"

"Then can you show me how to dance? I've been practicing but I'm not great at it." He stares at you, and you are worried you said something wrong until he laughs, it sounds smug you think but you can't be sure.

"That's the proper way to ask for a dance." He takes your hand in his as he bows, kissing it so gently you half think it was your imagination. "This is."

You pick up your phone before it buzzes, immediately sitting up in shock when you see just who is messaging you at 3:30 am on a Friday.

[Riddle] Are you still awake prefect?

[Yuu] Ace is that you.

[Yuu] I'm not covering for you if Riddle finds out you took his phone again (¬_¬)

[Riddle] What do you mean again?

The little knight's dance is stiff at first, but he relaxes as you continue. He has been guiding you to the center of the room, you belatedly realize. You must have looked frightened once you did. "It would be rude to stay in the corner during the slower songs." He squeezes your hand to bring your attention back to him. "It isn't against the rules to be bad at dancing, but it is to monopolize other people's space."

"Aren't you doing that right now?" You tease and he stops leading you, almost as if he hadn't even considered that.

"Are you not enjoying yourself?" He almost sounds afraid and you find yourself having to take over the direction of your movements.

"I didn't say that." Your knight almost seems to grow ten feet tall at your praise before he becomes aware of himself again and gets a bit bashful. But he does not take over again, content to let you set the pace of your dancing for the rest of the night.

[Riddle] Actually disregard that. Since you are awake, would you mind coming to your window? I understand throwing rocks is considered romantic but breaking a window would be most unfitting behavior for a housewarden.

You are tempted to tell him you are waiting for a message from someone else, but the unusual behavior has you at your window before you can even full form the thought. You almost drop your phone at the sight you see below you.

Riddle expected to have difficulty making eye contact with you. He expected to be teased about his failure to follow his own good advice, his costume has got to be a mess between the dancing he did with you earlier and the pacing he did once he got back to Heartslabyul.

But neither of those happen. Neither matters, instead you see him and the familiar scrap of paper you had given him with your number and a heart and fly down the Ramshackle steps into his outstretched arms.

"I'm so glad it was you I danced with tonight."

[akookminsupporter]

Sorry for the skz fan but... i dont really think they are lol

They are doing better in terms of streams than other bgs (but worse than ggs) and they have a lot of sales like any other bgs cause the fans inflate the sales. Bts with the same year (i think 5?) were already top10 on hot100 and all the charts made sense (number 1 on bb200 and top10 on hot100).

A lot of these groups are only able to go to these awards shows and be nominated (kpop categories) bcs bts made it possible, but i dont think they will ever leave bts shadow

Maybe ive been too harsh sorry lol but yeah they are not there yet and i dont think their music is going to take them there either (they are not even successfull in their own country - only on sales bcs of the 2973 versions)

In my initial post about this, I made it clear that my question wasn’t about streaming numbers because I know that when it comes to that, no one comes close to BTS. Even Jimin and Jungkook, as solo artists, have streaming figures that other groups haven’t achieved even if you combined their entire discographies. So no, my point wasn’t necessarily about streaming success or chart dominance although that's an important part of this conversation.

What I’m really referring to is the general interest in the Western market. For instance, another group that is often mentioned alongside BTS is BP. From what I’ve seen, they don’t have the same numbers, records, or awards that BTS has earned over the years and their popularity seems to be driven more by their individual projects, which are often unrelated to music, like brand endorsements, fashion appearances, or acting roles but despite this, Western mainstream media frequently references them as references to KPOP.

BTS’s success and interest in them have definitely been because of their music and their fans. Those are the key things you always hear or read about when people talk about them, and that’s not something I’ve noticed happening with other groups. Even when you move away from social media—where many groups are incredibly popular—you hardly see them mentioned in specialised press or mainstream media in general.

In my everyday life, I know plenty of people who’ve at least heard of BTS and even of Jimin. Jimin, in particular, seems to have some serious name recognition among locals. They might not know his music and a lot of the time, they don’t even know what he looks like, but they’ve definitely heard his name. At least, that’s been the case with the locals I know. I just don’t see that happening with other groups.

Anon mentioned examples where SKZ has broken through certain barriers in the West, but maybe it’s not as consistent. I think one major thing other groups are lacking—and it’s a big disadvantage—is the kind of fandom they have. ARMY is a fandom that’s almost as well-known as BTS itself. It’s massive, and despite its size, it’s surprisingly organised in many ways.

What’s more, ARMY generates a lot of interest because, at the end of the day, the goal of any market is to sell and to have people ready and willing to buy. The sheer scale and dedication of ARMY make it an undeniable force. It’s not just about supporting BTS; it’s also about creating a presence that attracts attention from all kinds of industries. That’s a level of influence that other groups and their fandoms just don’t seem to have yet.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Is Malleus not that famous in other countries cause in the Scalding Sands event Najma didn't seem to know who he was, there probably aren't many pictures of him around the internet but with how nervous Jamil was getting its weird it didn't cross her, you'd think he'd be pretty well known being the top 5 strongest mage and heir to the throne in Briar Valley

Well 😅 Najma’s just one person, right? I don’t think her specifically not knowing who Malleus is reflects on the average Twisted Wonderland civilian’s knowledge.

With that in mind, there’s actually many reasons why Najma in particular (and/or some other people) may not recognize Malleus:

People don’t always know political figures or figures of prominence in specific circles, especially if it isn’t of interest or of relevance to them. Think about it. Do you know the names and faces of political figures in countries outside of your own? What about specialists (athletes, artists, scientists) in fields you aren’t involved in? Thinking of it like that, it isn’t at all surprising that Najma, doesn’t recognize royalty from another country or highly ranked magicians (when she isn’t shown to be one herself).

Maybe Malleus just hasn’t been mentioned in Najma’s history class yet. For example, in Glorious Masquerade, we learn that Magic History class does not cover certain materials like the accomplishments of the Just Judge until year 2. Therefore, it’s possible that Najma has not yet learned about the Draconias in school. (Alternatively, it’s also possible that non-magic schools skim over notable mages; this would explain why NRC students specifically take Magic History, which I assume focuses on magic and mages, rather than just “History”.)

With how fae aging works, maybe the history books are just not up to date. There is a noted few hundred years of unexplained time between Malleus’s egg existing and it finally hatching when, in reality, it should have only taken a few years for his egg to hatch. It’s also said in book 7 part 4 that none of the history books speak of what happened to Briar Valley’s monarchs (ie Malleus’s parents), and that “the books at home and at the school library don’t mention anything about the Briar Valley’s history”.

It’s difficult to communicate with the Briar Valley. This is very possible, especially seeing as how the country is said to be lacking in way of technological advancements. (STYX is able to contact them, but they’re a secret organization 😂) This would likely mean that historians would have to physically travel far north to personally document Briar Valley themselves—which may be an arduous task, seeing as mirror travel and warp pads are not widely accessible to the general public. Since the Briar Valley is reclusive and even implied to not be accepting of non-fae, it may be even more challenging to get clearance to visit the country. A lot of their history seems to spread mainly by direct word of mouth (as Silver and Sebek imply in book 7; their father and grandfather, respectively, did not either of them about the Draconia family history or about the several years’ period of war Briar Valley went through).

In the actual Scalding Sands event, the visiting NRC students mention that the locals aren’t panicking about Malleus because the head wrap he’s wearing disguises him. Najma also later mistakes his horns as being decorations or fakes. This can easily be explained by the simple fact that… well, celebrities would wear different clothes in public to “blend in” and people wouldn’t recognize them because no one thinks “hey, I’ll run into a super famous person roaming my local market”. If you don’t pay enough attention to something, you may just overlook it. Attention is selective.

Aaaand of course, we have the good old boring explanation of “it’s for plot convenience, don’t question it” 😂

Personally, I think the “the history books just don’t talk about it” explanation is the most accurate, as there’s actual strong narrative implications of it in the main story; however, it’s possible that the real reason is a combination of all of these.

[spampai]

Talk Your Way Out! (Cancelled…)

Well, not exactly…

Prologue Part 4: Queen’s Pursuivants.

Well yeah I knew this was coming-NUH UH THAT AIN’T MY PLAN-

Yeah so I realized that this project ain’t going well, considering the fact that:

1. The script is very messy. YEAH I placed so much good ideas for the upcoming chapters but it feels like it was smooshed in and not well explained. The timeline isn’t explained as well, seeing that people didn’t notice the timeskip between Part 1 and Part 2.

2. The characters are not well put out. I didn’t really explain why they were acting out of character and the readers can’t symphatize well with these characters as they don’t know what the purpose of the scenes are for. Characters are out of character for no reason as I didn’t delve into that until further chapters, which in this case will still make people confused. They can act like they are, but I gotta give an explanation for it, which I failed to do in the current prologue.

3. Many people find it confusing rather than enjoyable. I’ve received lots of feedback on how it was ordered or how the story flows. Basically responding to the feedback and thinking about it more; ya, it is confusing the more I reread it. So yeah, that’s one of the reasons.

4. The execution isn’t as great as I thought I did. People got confused between chapters ‘cause the thought bubble wasn’t really recognizable (my indescribable art is pouring towards the story plotline ☠️). Some scenes are also not portrayed well as I lack the ability to show their positions on where they’re at or what situation they’re in (still kinda bad with that atm, will change soon). Expression and dialogue-wise it’s fine, but I didn’t like how I was using similar formats for the panels or some expressions seemed repetitive. Same goes for the speech bubbles. I still like the dialogues tho.

5. Not much recognition. Ya okay this is probably the least important part of what I want from this project. Yeah okay I admit it that’s also a reason I stopped this project. From the first part to the two other parts, it stopped getting that much attention and I felt like there’s something that’s making people lose interest. I spam reblog as a result, which I regret doing. This is why I even thought about ‘cancelling’ the project.

6. Wrong timing. Always posting it on dead hours, or when the fandom ain’t active. Too impatient, pretty sure. I promote it way too much with spam reblogs, which I still regret.

I changed my reasoning from ‘likes and reblogs will make me famous’ to ‘I need this community to provide feedback so I can improve myself as I grow and eventually get accepted in the ‘big artists’ community from now on.

I’m learning from my mistakes, and basically something for me to experience so I wouldn’t repeat again. So at the moment, it is cancelled…

BUT.

I never said it was cancelled with a period ;)

Stay tuned for my next few posts as it’ll revolve around this situation :))

While waiting, have some scenes of the aforementioned Part 4. I specifically like this part ‘cause I think it potrays these two a lot better, I just didn’t explain why Toadster was acting the way he is, which is repulsive and mean. I’ll be explaining that in my next few posts (No, I don’t ship them btw, I rarely ship characters unless it’s canon in the lore).

As for the deleted posts this morning, I figured it wasn’t the best time to post it, so expect it when the fandom is active again. See ya!

[skepticalarrie]

I think the down fall of The Boys will not be any type of scandal it will be because of their own fandoms.

They have built their success based on the loyalty and social media. People being die hards.

However, their fandoms are become increasingly toxic throughout the years to a point where you are seeing fans are becoming more "casual". The boys are distancing themselves from their own fanbases. Interactions are becoming more "professional" than them jumping on for a chat and joking around. Harry has pretty much pulled away completely. Everyone has a part in this not just certain sides of the fanbase. Negativity, Over criticizing every detail if they choose to post, people sexualizing them, the fandom wars. It is out of control in general across every aspect of these fandoms.

People becoming more "causal" fans and leaving their social media behind which will cause less streaming, less social media engagement, less free promo, less over all excitement for new albums. This overall hurts the boys success in the future. Labels will notice these things.

The Boys have built something amazing 15 years ago, that allowed them all to have solo careers they might not be the same as they were 15 years ago but they have relied on those loyal fans that helped them get where they are today. They have continued to think of the fans when they do projects but things have become so toxic they have all pulled away from their fanbases loosing something special fans once had with them.

It seems like people have a goal now just to come on X and fight with others, bully them, judge them, criticize what they post, out here having hate campaigns just because you don't agree with what someone says.

People's parasocial relationships are out of control. We don't know what they are thinking, what they go through, we don't know how they go about their everyday life, we truly don't know anything about their relationships. We truly don't know them. No matter how much content or music we have consumed over the years we don't know what they are like day to day in their personal lives.

Fans have created this toxic environment. Fans are beginning to pull away too. There is only so much negativity an artist or a fan can take before it affects them. Over time if this continues it will be the downfall of the boys and the fans. We are our own enemies. The fandom was never perfect but it is the worse I have ever seen it. How can people not see this?

I definitely agree that toxic fandom behavior can impact an artist’s success, but I don’t think it’s something unique to One Direction’s fandom at all. It feels more like part of a bigger trend in how people interact online... where anonymity and lack of accountability fuel so much negativity.

Honestly, this kind of environment forces artists to adapt, and that’s probably what we’re seeing happen. I don’t think having die-hard fans is always a good thing, or that losing die-hard fans is necessarily a bad thing either. There’s nothing wrong with having more casual fans. Look at Harry, he has a lot more casual fans now, and it’s actually worked out really well for him. I know we don't like that LOL but it's the truth.

At the end of the day, it’s about how an artist chooses to adapt to these dynamics and the extremes of their own fandoms. Their success will be an answer to how well they navigate that. And with 1D, it’s especially tricky because this fandom has so many extremes and different lanes, I mean, it's always been BAD. But yeah, I agree it's been worse and people are completely out of control.

[eve-to-adam]

I LOVE your art, especially as a fellow (albeit amateur) artist who’s OBSESSED with the whole Wars of the Roses period rn. In that vein, I was wondering if you had any advice/good resources as to researching fashion for character design reasons? Thanks!

Hello! :)

I'm excited to hear about other people - especially artists - interested in the Wars of the Roses era! I know that nice feeling - that thrill of excitement you get when you try to create something like this. It seems sublime to me! <333333

I don't know exactly if you want my advice and recommendations to be general or strictly about WOTR and implicitly the Middle Ages, but I will focus on the second option, because the process is the same.

Before starting, I want to specify that this is strictly my approach and that there are multiple ways to achieve the same result, as long as they make you feel comfortable.

My first advice would be this: try to be sure what exactly you want to illustrate. Although sometimes indecision can lead to unexpectedly positive results, most of the time it can cause your characters/illustrations to lack substance, which is caused by a lack of consistency. It's one thing to create a complex character and completely different to end up with an inconsistent one. What I want to say is that you have to make sure that you draw some specific barriers in order to obtain an optimal result. Try to figure out your character's personality before you dress them - don't forget that clothes are as important a component in character development as the details regarding interests/ambitions/favorite food, etc. Depending on the status, the concerns of your character and the context in which they are, you can deliberate the shape and color of the outfits. Taking into account these aspects, you allow yourself to deliberate: what kind of outfit would X wear? Does it match their personality? Is it having the desired impact? Shape, length, pattern? What about the colors? Are they expressive enough to give us a clue about the state of our character? What do we want to express through that outfit?

My second advice: Be creative! Use the resources you have to create the most original outfits. Of course, here it depends on how you approach the problem - you can recreate outfits up to 100% if you want to make a study or your own artistic documentation, but I, personally, put more value on originality.

For example - and this is a purely personal approach, not a standard to follow, because each of us wants to experiment and express things differently - when I create outfits, I tend to take elements from different pictures and combine them in this way so as to result in a completely new outfit. (There are times when an entire outfit takes shape in my mind just by looking at a pair of sleeves, or there are times when I sketch the entire outfit and have to search the entire internet for a suitable collar for this type of outfit. Or, I simply realized in the middle of the process that my character would not seem like the type of person to wear such a robe). Of course, considering the process, you have artistic freedom, so you can afford to illustrate totally original elements.

At the same time, try to give credibility to the character. Above we were talking about the substance. Well, one of the rules of character design is world-building. Many works of animation or comics with the fantasy genre contain elements inspired by the Middle Ages, and this is because the stories always have their origin in reality. Your character is only a part of a larger whole called the Universe. Depending on the genre of your story, the character must be an integral part of it, so you must take care of the particularities. If the narrative takes place in 1450, your character must have an appearance corresponding to the respective times. If the character serves in the army, we show them in the uniform specific to the period imposed by us; we also take care to give it a certain rigidity, hardness. If it's a detective, we introduce distinct elements such as the coat and hat, etc. Of course, speaking of fiction, we allow ourselves certain liberties for the sake of design.

Although during my university studies I was told to keep the character design as simple as possible, I chose not to follow this advice, lol. Because simplicity does not characterize me. The reason I'm bringing this up is BECAUSE if you're not familiar with the details/ haven't mastered the approach yet, it would really be advisable to keep the character design as simple as possible. Here is the reason: Originality. Particularity. When you create your character, especially if there is a long line of characters in the background, you must take into account the fact that the viewer must be able to tell them apart. Try to give each of them one or more distinctive signs, which can mean practically anything - a mustache, a mole, a longer neck, a special body shape, a patch on the eye, a more atypical hairstyle. I will not say that this aspect can necessarily be achieved through clothes. Here's the reason - imagine that your character is 5 m away from you and is looking at you. Under all those layers of clothing, how can you tell for sure who it is without that distinctive mark? Your character must be unique, it needs to stand out with something. Your character must be recognized by the public, even from a distance.

The rest depends on your tastes and your personal approach.

When I start working on an outfit, the first thing I think about is: what can I do and what can't I do? Did the clothing item I'm thinking of really existed or is it just a product of my imagination?

In most cases, I turn to the illuminations from manuscripts, tapestries, illustrations, portraits, paintings, etc., because absolutely nothing is more delightful than consulting the source directly.

Manuscripts that I have used over time in my creative process:

BnF Français 599 (De mulieribus claris).

Compilation arthurienne de Micheau Gonnot. Gautier Map, La Queste del Saint-Graal, La Mort le roi Artu.

Français 995.

BNF Fr874 (Héroïdes d'Ovide).

Croniques abregies commençans au temps de Herode Antipas, persecuteur de la chrestienté, et finissant l'an de grace mil IIc et LXXVI.

Paintings. You can use them to search for other such examples on the Internet:

Cornelis Engelbrechtsz - Konstantin & Helena.

Hans Holbein - Virgin with Child.

Hans Memling - Altarpiece with Virgin and Child, Jan de Witte and his wife.

Hans Memling - Maria Portinari.

Eliseo Sala, Malinconia o Pia de' Tolomei.

Antoni Peris - Altarpiece of the Life of Virgin - Altarpiece of the Nursing Madonna.

Filippo Lippi - Portrait of a Woman with a Man at a Casement.

Simon Marmion - Exterior of St. Bertin Altarpiece Wings. 1459.

These books may also help you. I chose the ones that also contain illustrations:

Herbert Norris – Medieval costume and Fashion.

Kathy Elgin – Costume & Fashion. Source Books.

Mary G. Houston – Medieval costume in England and France. The 13th, 14th and 15th centuries.

Francis Grew, Margrethe de Neergaard – Shoes and Pattens.

Talbot Hughes – Dress design.

I hope my answer was helpful! :)

[maoam]

Ramblings stemming from frustration with this fandom sometimes. ( Naruto. )

I know Naruto fandom has always been a tad toxic ever since it started becoming popular and such, but something about these newer fans who are so comfortable with d3ath threats, body shaming, sa threats, and d0xxing other people for the sake of a character. Fandom discourse is truly never that serious and the fact that they’ve become so obsessed with “ratioing” or “owning” other people that they’re willing to say absolutely vile things all for what… some likes? Validation from other gross people?

And then for these people to still say they’re the “good part of the fandom” or “the sane part”. It’s almost narcissistic for lack of a better word at the moment. ( not diagnosing anyone or speaking as if I’m some sort of mental health expert. Just can’t think of another word right now because of the headache this phenomenon is causing me as it is becoming much too common. )

They have this obsession with demonizing “the other side.” To the point of making false claims, which is insane. Or maybe they actually believe them? I can’t tell. They just spread whatever makes them feel good about what they like and don’t care about the source.

This is mainly a lame annoyed rant about the Hinata fanbase which have become somehow even worse within the past few days with their weird obsession with trying to get the Boruto artist (I think he works for sp? Unsure as he says most of his art is fanart but he made a like two or three official pieces that were on the official boruto/naruto page.) fired and sending him death threats for I guess just not drawing Hinata as much as they want? Like to the point where they were literally saying she was being “oppressed and bullied” by this artists. It was insane to see in person because you really would like to believe people WOULDNT compare a character not being drawn in a way they approve of to the oppression the people of Palestine are facing but hey, I suppose it’s a competition now to see how much of a bad person you can be for the sake of a character.

Also I know this is not just an issue in the hinata fandom, although the recent need to fetishize how “Asian Hinata is compared to that white girl sakura.” Is irking me a lot more than what other fandoms have done as of recent that I’m aware of. The Sakus seem to be their usual level of delusion and crappy attitude. Which is easy to ignore for me.

Does it sound like I’m making stuff up at this point? Because as I’m writing this I’m seeing just how insane this really is. This *shouldn’t* be real. This *shouldn’t* be things people say without shame. And yet, people just throw their morals for… what, internet points? The self validation that they defended to their favorite character? Who knows.

You might not even read this, I wouldn’t blame you lol. Just me being annoyed with how comfortable people within the naruto fandom have become so comfortable with being bad people.

My only real question is have you noticed an increase of toxicity within the fandom? Do you think this behavior has gotten worse with the ending of Naruto and beginning of Boruto?

I kinda get what you mean. I remember even before the manga ended there was apparently aggressive fights between Narusaku/Naruhina shippers, like the body shaming towards the other ship's girl and so on. And SS also were aggressive. But nowadays it indeed seems worse. I'm not sure if it's because we have new big platforms? Twitter and Tiktok I mean, both have really cancerous fandom spaces.

SS/NH harass official staff all the time, as well as other parts of the fandom. And then they act like victims because some people think Sakura and Hinata are shitty characters lol. Meanwhile they treat real people like shit. I think it might be because everyone makes fun of their ships/girls all the time, because it's so easy, so they become even crazier in trying to compensate, they try to harass the staff for more content for their ship, to get back at the people who say their ships suck. Also because so many popular content creators keep making content on Naruto and Sasuke being gay and Sakura/Hinata being their beards it's also humiliating to them.

Of course, they also need to fight which girl is the best girl. Which girl is less of a single mother for example. XD

"Or maybe they actually believe them?" Considering how many SS have convinced themselves that some moments that happened between Naruto and Sasuke actually happened between Sasuke and Sakura, I can believe them being that delusional.

"Does it sound like I’m making stuff up at this point?" No because I have witnessed it myself, plenty Sakura and Hinata stans on twitter have that toxic "bad bitch" attitude that they think makes them queens or whatever, they harass people and are extremely aggressive and think female character doing the bare minimun = queen behaviour. It comes off as very childish and narcissistic. No wonder Sakura and Hinata as characters appeal to them.

[reel-fear]

Happy Disability Pride Month! Please don't support SCAVENGER ON THE WIND

CW for body horror, disturbing imagery and paranoia triggers below!

I know a lot of people are probably excited about this MAP

It's one that came out recently and got a lot of views fairly quickly. However, as you can see it features body horror and disturbing imagery in its thumbnail.

This is dangerous and not okay for multiple reasons. For one. Warrior Cats is a series for children, children are not good at handling disturbing imagery nor body horror. It could give them nightmares, stress, or even trauma in the worst cases. See stuff like Smile HD and other shock horror using children's media that is luckily now commonly frowned upon.

That's not to say all horror using children's media is unethical just that it 1. Should come with a prominent warning that it is not for kids and 2. Shouldn't feature shocking content in the thumbnail as anyone who could be triggered or disturbed by that content can't prevent YouTube from showing it to them. This video breaks both rules.

This is the only warning the MAP has. It mentions nothing specific that could actually trigger someone and doesn't even bother to label itself as not something kids should consume. This warning has all the usefulness of opening a game that tells you "This Game Contains Scenes". I'm sure many of you are thinking it could just be a simple and easy-to-fix mistake...

However, the host is not interested in fixing any of this despite people politely pointing out these exact problems. Which I will show soon.

Another important thing is that generally making horror content should always be done with caution. You shouldn't include anything too graphic or disturbing in your thumbnail and oftentimes it's preferred you keep it very tame. Doing otherwise could cause people with particular triggers to have a horrible reaction to them.

Sadly disabled people are already really ignored and stepped over in a lot of horror communities, analogue horror is sadly a very prominent one. People with physical disabilities are often tagged as "Body Horror" with no consideration to how hurtful that label could be to them and sometimes even used as disturbing images to jumpscare you in stuff like games inspired by Mandela Catalogue.

the mentally ill are only treated worse both by fans of horror and by horror content itself. This treatment actively contributes to their discrimination in real life, which is why it's so important to listen to them on topics like this. Sadly it doesn't seem like this host cares for them at all.

This extremely defensive and immature post was made in response to these incredibly polite and kind comments.

These people were:

Super polite

Offered solutions to this problem.

Were just trying to prevent harm coming from people who might find the content in this MAP disturbing.

The replies they received were none of the above. Funky and Erlkremling [A prominent horror WC artist] both dismissed these concerns with Erlkremling being particularly rude to them.

This is dangerous but most of all shows an extreme lack of care or regard to those who suffer from mental disorders.

I myself tried to point this out, only to get even crueler comments from the host and Erlkremling.

This is to put bluntly, fucking cruel to those who suffer from these problems. Why is it that when Cheetah Z has flashing lights that could harm people it's a problem but saying 'don't put disturbing imagery in your THUMBNAILS which nobody can prevent from being shoved into their dash' it's too far to compare them?? This is so blatantly treating mentally ill folks like their issues, their struggles, THEIR SAFETY FOR FUCKS SAKE, is less important than their 'actually disabled' counterparts.

They are literally admitting this is a problem, that other popular horror medias in this fandom suffer this problem. But instead of seeing that and saying "oh my god, I'm contributing to a running problem of ableism in this fandom I should stop." They're saying "Well if those other people ALSO think a png is more important than disabled people's safety surely I'm in the right!"

The absolutely apathy towards the suffering of disabled people has genuinely brought me to tears just thinking of the way they replied to me. THIS IS OVER A PNG, A THUMBNAIL THEY COULD TAKE JUST A FEW HOURS TO REDRAW, that fucking image to them is more important than the safety of disabled folks. Happy fucking disability pride month to you too btw.

To put it bluntly, if you see this situation for the upsetting awful mess it is I would highly suggest not supporting this MAP and letting the participants know what kind of behavior they are associating themselves with.

Here's a link with all the map parts, tell the participants what kind of behavior they are encouraging by taking part in this project.

Here's the og map call, tell the host how unacceptable and cruel this treatment of the mentally ill is.

Sadly unless there is a big backlash, it's very unlikely any of these creators will care about those they have affected. I honestly can't even describe how horrible all the things they have implied in these comments is.

To try and argue some people are just 'too mentally ill' to belong in internet spaces is HORRIBLE, they want people they deem 'too disabled' to simply NOT EXIST in online spaces. This is literally them fully admitting some disabled people simply don't belong in public spaces, don't deserve to be heard in online discussions and are simply not as important as other disabled folks when it comes to making things accessible for them.

I've been genuinely losing sleep over this at times, neurotypical people just have no idea how stressful, how upsetting and how hurtful it can be to know you're considered 'lesser' than other 'actually disabled' folks. To be trampled and spoken over, spoken to like you're NOTHING on these issues. So please from the pleas of a disabled artist in this space.

Please, Please reblog and spread this, on this month above all else we should be focused on stopping this kind of behavior.

Just because it's a consistent issue in this fandom doesn't make it okay to spread it even more. In fact I am inviting anyone reading this, if you see gore, body horror and general disturbing imagery in a thumbnail please inform the uploader of the real damage it can do to the mentally ill. Sadly, I put off posting this for a long time, because I didn't think anyone would listen or care unless I did it this month.

That's just a sad reality for a lot of mentally ill folks, in online spaces we're silenced. We just have to live with that a lot of the time, but I'm not gonna let this slide on a month dedicated to people like me and those who behavior like this hurts. Neither should you.

[torveiglyart]

The more I think about my hobbies and achievements (or lack thereof), the weirder I realize my life is. I had never really thought about some of these things until as of recent, specifically when someone introduced to another as "cool". Like what.

First things first that I've talked about on here is I'm an oboe player. Which is already a kind of "different" instrument to play. And, actually, I've been third chair in the All-District wind ensemble for grades 11-12. So there's that.

Another thing I tend to tell people /if prompted/ is I'm a nationally recognized Scottish Highland dancer. I placed third in the southeast regionals and qualified to perform in Las Vegas along with everyone else who qualified across the country. This one is kinda like my "fun fact" during ice breakers 'cause it's something I know won't be repeated.

I'm a digital artist, as you all know, but I also do traditional art often. A few of my paintings in my portfolio helped me score a spot in NCSU's ID program. Maybe one day I'll scan them and post here.

I'm a singer. This one goes multiple ways as in: HS choir, church choir, musical theatre, and bands. I just like singing and got blessed with a nice voice... I think.

I can bake and decorate very well. As in won a cookie decorating contest at the NC State Fair well. That was a good year for me :). But it's also the perfect ganache every time kind of good. I guess the same can be said about cooking given no meal I've made has gone wrong or tasted bad. I seriously hope it stays that way.

This next one only partially counts because while I'm not /fluent/ by any means, I can somewhat comfortably hold a conversation in a few languages. French, Spanish, Japanese, and, strangely enough, Swahili, are languages I've worked on since uhhhh... I don't know at this point. And I've since added Scottish Gaelic to that list to work on. Languages just fascinate me and I plan to travel A LOT when I get the money to do so.

I do archery in my free time. Often enough I have my own bow and arrows. It’s fun. And last time I went to an actual range I never missed a target which I’m totally bragging here but it’s also just a fun activity to get anger out, you know?

Back to the musical theatre thing, I actually was called back for an audition to enroll at UNCSA, but did not make it. And back in freshman year, I did this whole Society Performers multi-class thing, but cut it short to work on my studies. So while I probably could have gone into theatrics, I don't think that would have been the best choice for me.

An going further back to the instruments, I can also play piano, ukulele, and clarinet, but lessons are those were far fewer than oboe.

Time for the weirder stuff.

I definitely have ADHD, and so does my dad, but we're both undiagnosed so let's just not go there.

I can't whistle or roll my tongue. People always seem really surprised by this one but it's not like I'm in a tiny percentage with that one.

I'm nearsighted in one eye and far sighted in the other, and I also only require one contact lense/prescription. Actually let's call this the whacky section.

I'm allergic to celery. Yes, celery. And only that. Not pollen, not pets, not dust, not even ragweed, but celery. And only when it's raw. Cooked in a dish? Fine. Raw in a salad? Cotton-mouthed and itchy. Not terribly sad about it though.

I can't ride a bike. Like, I know how to in theory, but I just never had a bike growing up. My older sister's always had a flat tire, and by the time my younger brother got one, I was too big to ride it. So I scooter instead :).

I have perfect pitch, as in I hear a pitch, and can tell you the note it is, and can tell you what key a song is originally in and sing it. I would get in trouble a lot as a kid for "picking a fight" with my siblings by telling them, "it actually goes like this," and then changing the key they were singing in. While many find this cool or helpful, unless you're a music student or something, it's actually annoying. The car radio is always a few microtones sharp and there's nothing I can do to make it in tune. My choir teacher would also have me sing the starting pitch for songs, no tuner, which was nerve-wracking.

WOW this was just me ranting (bragging) lol, sorry about that, but hey! Now you know more about me!

If you have any questions or comments, don't be afraid to ask! Or, y'know, do the whole asks thing. I think I changed the icon for that but I'm not sure.

[coldresolve]

tbh i didnt mean “not wanting to be criticized” i meant “not wanting to search up things and dive into stuff”. Rolling your head on the keyboard and relaxing while creating something is not the same by any means. I was also thinking more of visual art when i wrote that, since “art” is usually used in that sense these days. I do write and i do “research” (not like actual research articles tho) but i couldnt care less about political or any “other” interpretations. I know ur on the mindset of “all art is political” but nah. I just like creating. I dont even ever look ar politics. No news, no social media, nothing, i dont care, i dont interact, i dont listen. Not something that i care about. And im not the only one. And thats also fine. Art and creativity and the act of creation means different things to different people and noone can make a blanket statement with saying “its always political” or “it always has a »deeper« meaning”.

I also dont think “no deeper meaning” means its “shallow” or “lacks depth” (eventho this sounds contradictory), it just means that what might mean something to the artist, doesn’t necessarily mean anything for others and interpretating it in all kinds of ways is the viewers own opinions (also fine, but my point stays that it wasnt “meant” to be interpreted in any way other than how the artist meant it). Like idk how to explain this but just because you (or anyone) thinks about art in such a “deep” and “layered” way its not always like that. Not by far.

Woodworking is art. Pottery is art. Even architecture is art. All those art forms usually dont have any “statement”, or if they do, its not as common. Its relaxing and soothing to just… create. And im not saying “oh just start woodworking without any research”, that would most likely be a safety hazard. What im saying is not knowing about all these political bulshits and not CARING about them either doesnt make the art less valid?

I used these examples because writing and drawing is usually more “political” for a lot of people (including you I know) but for many people its just the same as a piece of pottery or wood statue they work on to relieve stress. And the way you talk about art/writing makes it seem like those people are “less than”. Because they dont do research, because they dont use themes or whatever all those things. No, you dont have to do all those if you just wanna create. Its gatekeepy af.

And tbf at least they are creating it themselves, even if it doesnt fit your standards. At least they arent using some ai. In these times we need to encourage people to create more than ever instead of gatekeeping art and writing and talking down to people who arent as sophisticated as you are.

Because your writing and art is insane but man that shits stressfull. I just want to relax and turn my brain off and create some art to soothe my nerves… not all this political implications lol

My opinion and i know you disagree but anyways. You said you like “criticism” so thougth i would share my thougths too.

hope you dont mind if i break it up by point. below the cut cause youve said a lot and i say a lot, ayy

you wanna have mindless fun and dont care if it comes at the cost of spreading harmful misinfo, bigotry or stereotypes, i got it. i read you loud and clear. im also criticizing you for it, which according to this, you shouldn't have a problem with

so when you said in the last ask that you don't care about 'pushing bad stereotypes', you meant visually...? are you drawing racist charicatures or sth lmao

you're right, i do think all art is political, but politics isnt just men in suits arguing about taxes yknow. a political ideology is a prescriptive worldview, that's it. broadly speaking, it's about how you see the relationship between the past/present/future, resources and power, who has them and who don't, and does that align with our ethics, etc. why things are the way they are and how they ought (/not) to be. how you see the world, other people and yourself necessarily shows up in self-expression, that is what self-expression is. it's inherent to art, and you can't get away from this by simply going 'not true' - what you're telling me here is just that you've decided you personally don't care. which is your right i suppose

just like i have a right to be able to think of this 'heres all the ways i'm extremely apolitical' section as you just declaring a privelege. lots of people - especially this site's userbase - don't get the luxury of being able to look away, because their existence itself is highly politisized. either you pay attention or they start sending you and your friends to camps, babey. deciding to be apolitical is a Very political act

you're not sticking fully to topic here. i never talked about depth, i talked about engaging with art uncritically, which are two different things. i do hold the former as an opinion but this is already long, send a different ask if you want me to get into it lol its mostly just me being a judgy bitch abt popular culture

to the relevant stuff, im just gonna reiterate that the themes you put in your work exist whether you want them to or not. death of the author, that whole thing. if you portray poverty in a way that suggests poor people are just being lazy, or that black people are violent, or that gay people are predatory, if you essentialize these traits in any given work, that is the statement that depiction makes, regardless of whether the artist actually believes it's true or not. that's just how biases work in fiction. it's not gonna stop existing because you stop paying attention to it.

funny you should mention woodworking - hi, im a cabinetmaker and i love talking about my craft. cool facts: scandinavian woodworking tends to use sustainable/local wood, minimalistic and semi-rustic designs with a focus on elegance and simplicity, and mostly uses natural finishes. american wwoodworking is a bit flamboyant and grand, frequently uses exotic woods for details, bulkier designs, with a focus on sturdiness and practicalty, and mostly uses glossy/shiny finishes. japanese woodworking is all about precision, subtlety and a world-famous tradition of the craft spanning back millenia, using wood from species that allow for chisel work with a precision that's down to the width of a human hair, occasionally stained with some nice colors (asia generally loves wood stain). ikea's woodworking uses cheap materials and cost-effective factory production, focuses on the mass marketability of their furniture, and has a legal team to deal with worker's rights abuses and forced labor cases. if you can read nothing about priorities and worldview into any of this, i don't know what to tell you. alas its true. your chair is indeed political

this doesn't mean you can't also use any chair to simply sit down in. these two aren't mutually exclusive.

pottery is the same. architecture is the same. in fact, tell any former soviet country that there's no politics in architecture lol they'll look at you weird

never said your art isn't valid or whatever, idek what that means in this context. i just said i can still criticize your racist charicatures regardless of how much mindless fun you had making them lol

(in case its not obvious i dont think youre making racist charicatures or all that shit, im going to the extremes to illustrate a point ykwim. im guessing you'd be fine with me critizising racism in fiction - in fact i don't actually believe you'd disagree with any of the things i've said if i'd framed it in terms of racism, or at least i hope not lol i dont know how far your take goes. im challenging a double standard ig)

"because they don't use themes" mhm, youre one of the ppl who dont know what a theme is, which ig is pretty valuable for context. art necessitates making decisions about what you portray and how you portray it. those decisions say something about your thought process, which your audience is able to draw conclusions about, or at least interpret from. art is a form of communication. if you create art, you are communicating. it means something. there is a message, usually more than one. that's what themes are. can be as benign as "damn hangovers kinda suck" or some grand statement about the nature of being human, doesn't matter. both of those things are themes

i don't think any person is "less than", i'm criticizing people's approach to art. person =/= person's approach to art. remember in my original post when i said that criticism is not the same as personal attacks? or cultural elitism?

im not particularly sophisticated, i just like abstraction cause im mentally ill lmfao. and i do want to encourage people to make art. i just also hate consumerist brainrot, so

its not that i cant relate to wanting to turn your brain off sometimes and just watch some sloppy horror movie or whatever, i do that too. but i also recognize that said sloppy horror movie can be criticized in seventy thousand different ways, and at least being aware of that instead of mindlessly consuming probably leads to a more wholistic appreciation of the art you create and engage with.

this is sliding into opinion territory like the sidenote in my last answer, so beware, but. if 'mindless fun' is the only way you engage with art, you're missing out, i'm sorry, Facts*. you're treating art like content to be consumed to distract you from the real world, not as something thats supposed to inspire or motivate or make you think about/understand things. it's reductive of what art has the potential to do, the ways it can help you grow. it takes effort to change your approach and i get that, but it gets easier once you've done it enough, and it is very worthwhile imo. just sayin'. im genuinely being an optimist about art here

*= opinion lol. but its a strong opinion which is basically the same as a fact**

**= irony

anyway i genuinely enjoy having these sorts of conversations just for the record. am able to disagree with someone without assuming they're a bad person or whatever. i understand if youre not interested in talking continuing but youve been fairly respectful or whatever so thats nice, love and peace✌️

[tomcat-radio]

Why Asteroid City is Better Than the Reviews, IMDb Isn’t Always Right, and You’re a Shitty Painting - an essay of sorts

Asteroid City (2023), despite what critics would have you believe given it’s rated just a sliver above the 2012 adaptation of Dr Seuss's “The Lorax '', was (to me) genuinely a fantastic movie. For its entire run I sat there in the theatre, thinking “why can’t people appreciate this film!”. I’m sick of the reviews blatantly coming from the place of the critics analysing it from the lens of a science fiction story when in reality, it’s more-so an abstract exploration of the delicate relationship between art, artist, portrayal and probably not aliens.

ASTEROID CITY IS NOT A SCI FI MOVIE AND I'M GOING TO BOMB THE IMDB HEADQUARTERS IF I SEE ONE MORE BIG SHOT MOVIE CRITIC INSISTING THAT IT IS (for all intents and purposes this is a joke, to the fbi agent looking through my webcam I’m a pretentious teenager year old without the technical knowledge to make any kind of explosive device)

Or maybe it isn’t supposed to be understood at all, maybe that movie was simply an excuse to build a fake town in the desert and some puppets. And in a way that’s just as beautiful, postmodernism is more than worthy of critique, but when it looks pretty and makes us feel anything at all, it’s safe to say it’s at least partially doing it’s job

Asteroid city however, is merely an example I used to express my burning personal hatred for movie critics. I actively avoid reading the reviews for anything that brings me joy, because I’m aware at this point that the statements I read are going to contain some of the most insane, infuriating possible opinions anyone could have of a piece of media, and I am beginning to suspect more and more that critics, not just of movies but of genuinely anything in existence that can possibly be critiqued, aren’t expressing their legitimate opinions but rather spewing whatever inflammatory nonsense they believe will cause some kind of controversy or outrage, because outrage sells. If one fact has been proven over the course of human civilization, it’s that outrage gets more clicks, more views, more exposure. 

Obviously anyone in their right or wrong mind understands that someone else’s opinion doesn’t at all determine the objective quality of a given ‘thing’, but it can often be hard to NOT give what they have to say a chance. I genuinely resent possessing the empathy to consider the thoughts of others despite how objectively incorrect they seem. But they’re people too! They could have a point! I say to myself as they tear apart something that is personally very meaningful to me. Curse in disguise I guess. But in the end, what is objective quality? if something at its core is bad, but you receive personal enjoyment from it, or it’s even sentimental to you or has made a positive change in your life, does it quality or lack of matter? Does it really matter what some 45 year old man sipping on a glass of champagne as he adjusts his spectacles to spew pretentious nonsense into the IMDb critic reviews, might think about a movie that got you through a rough time, or an album you grew up listening to? Are we allowed to enjoy ‘bad’ art? And most divisive of all, is there such a thing as bad art?

I once read an article about a museum of bad art, submissions would often be rejected for being too good. And yes, the examples of art displayed within this unique exhibition were unnerving, technically poor, but meaningless? I’m not at all one to determine that. Even absolutely meaningless, humorous, random art has a meaning, and that meaning is derived from the fact that no matter how positively offensive to the eyes or ears may be, it was still created. Think about everything that’s ever come into existence within the fabric of our reality, no, think about everything that hasn’t. It’s impossible for us to imagine the magnitude of the things that are possible but simply haven’t been thought of, conceived. Maybe it’s a hit to your self esteem to think your parents could have given birth to the next DaVinci, the next Stephen Hawking, the second coming of Christ! But instead gave birth to you. Do you consider yourself a work of bad art? Does your life have meaning? 

All this to simply explain that the interpretations of a few writers put on a pedestal shouldn’t have any place to decide our stance on a piece of media. Yes these reviews can certainly influence the way we feel, or articulate the points we have, but if or when you feel genuinely hurt by the fact that someone disagrees with, misunderstands or dislikes something that’s personally meaningful and enjoyable to you, their opinion doesn’t always matter regardless of the status their name may have achieved (this is of course, excluding when the media in question is blatantly problematic, which poses another debate in itself. Is it still homophobic if I like it? Find out next time on I’m Getting Overly Passionate About Seeing Some Reviews I Disagree With)

In conclusion, it’s ok to enjoy what you enjoy, regardless of the subjective or even objective quality of it, we as the consumers are the ones to truly decide how “good” or “bad” something is. That’s the core concept behind why critics exist, to guide those who don’t wish to form an opinion for themselves, to do the job for us, but when we’ve done said job for ourselves it’s never wrong to disagree with someone over something that is personally meaningful to you. It’s almost guaranteed someone will disagree with the points made in this essay of sorts, but that doesn’t make either of us right or wrong. In the end, these previous 962 words have truly amounted to one encompassing phrase: “you are entitled to your opinion”

[astroyongie]

Everglow October Reading 2023

Note: please take it lightly and enjoy <3

Sihyeon

Love: She is coming out of a breakup and at the moment she is still going through all the whiplash from the hurt that this breakup is giving her. Sihyeon isn’t in her best condition and I believe that her heartbreak is actually causing her physical symptoms. 

Career: She is limiting herself a lot. I don’t think her career is something she is passionate about and more like a work she has to do to receive money. She is very organized on what she has to do, but she feels like she doesn’t have a lot to do anyways 

Self: She has so many priorities in her life that she sometimes doesn’t know what to choose or what to start with. She jungles a lot between things and I hope that her erratic way of living will find balance so it doesn’t impact her health 

E:U

Love: She is dating someone at the moment, probably an old friend of hers or someone who has always been around her. This person isn’t an artist or working in the industry. In any case, she is very happy with them and they have a rather stable thing 

Career: Things seem to be going relatively good. She has strong support inside the company and he is very close to her manager, which helps her create a good working environment and a rather stable and healthy relationship with everyone else who works with her 

Self: She lacks self-esteem and she doesn’t believe she is that good to be an idol (she thinks people only like her for her looks). EU have probably some type of impostor syndrome and I also see that she isn’t really a truthful person, almost like she keeps secrets all the time and lies rather easily to others 

Mia

Love: She is single and not looking for love relationships at the moment. Mia likes her independence and she rather stays that way. However she does talk and flirt with some people through her media and text, but that’s about it 

Career: I believe that there’s a male energy in her life in the workspace that is extremely manipulative towards her and makes sure to always put her first among other members (which creates a lot of conflict). This person is also emotionally abusive and very moody but the thing is that his energy goes through Mia. So rather than taking action, she too gets muddy and manipulative toward members when work is related 

Self: She isn’t on her best days. I see that she went through a lot mentally and still today she fights against her mental health as she tries to improve. I also see that a major event happened in her life that caused her to completely sink when it comes to depressive states. Something she hasn’t healed yet 

Onda

Love: I believe she is in a relationship with an idol but things are a little complicated here. The person she is with is very impulsive and hast, they want to do things always like they want and quickly, pushing her through her boundaries. Onda has been ruthless with her high expectations and only gives these people what they want if they exceed her expectations 

Career: The way she has been saving money is no joke. Every time she receives something from her work or her company she keeps it away and tries her best to have some financial background to help her out. Onda is scared to have to go through other difficult times financially 

Self: She has been a little bit lost lately. I don’t think she knows what she wants for herself, for her career, or just for her family and her future in general. Onda feels like simply following the flow and the rules and she hasn’t been thinking about herself. 

Aisha

Love: Rather happy, Aisha is in a relationship that lasts for a long time now and everything seems to be going very well for her. She is happy, healthy and her relationship is stable and it seems that it’s meant to continue as it is

Career: She has been very inspired, almost like she wants to work and do her own lyrics and stuff for the group. But she is also a little bit impulsive with what she does and some people might not like how she works 

Self: Moving forward with her life, she doesn’t dwell on her past or on things that have happened to her. She tries her best to keep going and leaving what isn’t necessary for her behind her 

Yiren

Love: She is still healing from her breakup earlier this year (with that 4th gen idol) and things with her love life as just erratic since her relations with Korea aren’t the best at the moment and it does seem that all that concerns her heart is giving her more headaches than joy 

Career: Her career seems to be going well, mostly because she receives so many opportunities and projects to work on (mostly in China) and the money they pay is way better than in Korea. Yiren has also been generous and helping those in need (friends and family). 

Self: She has been having a lot of arguments and disagreements with people around her (friends, family, co-workers, etc). It seems like Yiren has a hard time communicating with people and making her voice heard