#it's always hating wilhelm hours

[randomnameless]

The zombie ask made me remember a thought I had for SS's final chapter where anyone who got blood directly from Rhea would have been resurrected to protect her (their vision is like that horror game blurry where they can see enough to spot you but can't see you from across the map). Jerry and Willy are mini-bosses near Rhea to make the area around her dangerous. Jerry and Billy having a talk where Jerry says anything he wished he could've said in life‚ and Willy having convos with empire (1/3)

(2/3) and nabatean units. Like Willy saying to Seteth‚ "Cichol! How long has it been? About the shield-" and Seteth wondering if the Willy talking to him is actually there or it's Rhea perception of Willy talking. Willy's empire convos would lean towards Willy himself is talking‚ with him saying to Ferdinand‚ "I never thought I'd see the day that anyone related to Aegir would join Nemesis." Him mistaking Bernie for Indech. And Billy's would be Willy thinking they're Nemesis (3/3) "Despite my vision‚ I know that's you Nemesis. I don't know how you're alive but this time you're staying dead!"‚ and anyone related to the elites as "After Seiros sparred you all‚ you dare turn your blade against her?! Do you even know what your 'relic' is made from?" TL;DR: I wanted more WoH content despite Nopes giving some‚ and thinking about how can I jam in as much as I can with the subtlety of a sledgehammer. Sorry for the long ask‚ wanted to get these thoughts out of my system.

No pbs anon!

I guess we all didn't like at all how the game bothered to bring back zombies but never wrote battle quotes against them (tfw Seteth'n'Flayn have no battle quote against Nemesis...)

I was going to hype zombie!Ionius, but he never got her blood directly, so he wouldn't have been resurrected :(

(let's be real, if zombie!Ionius was real and brought back in his prime, he would fold those Faerghian barbarians and those foreigners with his pinky, because he'd be that much of an awesome unit)

However, instead of them being "mistaken" because their resurrection failed about what's happening, I'd say let them get full awareness (as much as they can muster) about who they're fighting against!

I'd see a Jerry-Billy convo being a lot of apologies, especially since Billy accepted to take Rhea's mantle and was/is truly happy in the Monastery, something Jerry obviously wrote off when he ran away all those years, maybe we could have Jerry muse that it's weird how he was "brought back" to protect a Rhea who lost her mind know, and how ironic it is, when he should have stayed and maybe if he didn't ran away all those years ago, Billy would have led a happier life, and whatever Rhea's having right now wouldn't have happened. Billy ultimately putting his grievances to rest, saying that despite everything, they are still happy Jerry's their dad, and maybe ends with some "thank you Father" instead of calling them Jerry (in an AU where Billy is voiced, of course!).

Maybe a convo with Leonie too, where Jerry tries to goad her into killing him, saying she never got what it "takes" to be a merc, because she is a nice kid and isn't able to put her morals aside for a bag of money.

And with Alois, Jerry could encourage him, for the "first and last time", saying he'll make a fine Captain of the Knights, and to please not end up like him, mocking the wishes of his wife and not doing everything he could for the kid.

---

Emperor Willy himself wondering where the fuck he is, but if Seiros is in this form, then he has to protect her - and it this is the post Lycaon death AU* Willy isn't surprised at seeing Adrestia turn its blade against Seiros, because Adrestia is a failure and he lost faith in the world.

Against Cichol, Willy could open the convo with the shield, noticing how Cichol took "his" shield, Seteth tries to reply but it's useless, and asks him to stand aside, Willy says he cannot, even for him, his "brother" because Seiros is his priority, and if in that state she'll bring ruin to the world, then so be it, Seteth sighs, apologises (and rekts him).

I suppose Flayn would ask him to get the fuck out of the way, and Willy will refuse, but also apologise for what happened to her, and her mother too (and her cousin!), but crusts this world and its inhabitants are to blame.

Willy against Billy... well, Willy will think they're one of Nemesis's scion even if he thought the guy died childless- despite their hair color, he knows better after all! - and reveals he was on Macuil's side, and told Seiros mercy would be wasted on the likes of them (the Elites' families and, I suppose, Nemesis's potential fam?), but she didn't listen to him.

Willy against the Empire peeps would be hilarious though, because in the AU* Willy ditched it after Lycaon's death, so he'd be pretty pissed that the same Empire now tries to kill Seiros. Maybe he'd call Ferdie a scion of traitor, referring to Derrick, who pledged his loyalty to an usurper (Empress Hildegarde, who took the throne after Lycaon's death), raving about how he descends from a line of traitors, and he will put an end to this farce himself (with his stats? lol).

Willy'd also be pissed seeing Bernie, digusted at what Adrestia became if Bernie, as a noble, is what Adrestia's finest has to offer (maybe insert a fire joke or two) - Bernie could find the courage to fight back against this rando who insults her and tell him to shut up, because she wants to fight to protect people now.

Lin would maybe comment on Willy being, well, Willy, and wondering why the fuck is he fighting against the Empire, maybe with Willy telling him this is what he should have down instead, cutting off his own "blood"* for the sake of Fodlan, but he will correct this mistake right now.

Caspar would be interested in fighting this "strong warrior" from ancient times, if the fate of Fodlan wasn't at stake, Willy'd swore he came from an Elite family with a mindset like this, but only be digusted.

As for Petra, maybe we could get an ancient exemple of Adrestian assholery, like Willy saying he thought the people of "Eyvel" wouldn't be mindless allies of the Empire, and how mistaken he was, they're "savages" after all - only for Petra to reply with some "who are you? Get out of my way plz" (and she crits him and he dies).

And for Doro... I guess their convo would be the most important "lore wise", Doro immediately recognises him and wonder if he is here to avenge Edie - Willy immediately cuts her off, asking why he should even care about that person when no one avenged his son when he was murdered by his "bastard" siblings (confirming that Supreme Leader is not part lizard!).

*The AU I'm talking about is the AU I came up with, aka Lycaon being a half lizard, being named heir, murdered by his "human" half-siblings/nephews - Willy learns it and immediately bails out of Adrestia, having lost faith in Fodlan, humanity and well, most likely everything. After 80 years of chronic depression (while Rhea is now obsessed with bringing back Sothis, because she will make the world go round, and be safe anew for Nabateans living and the ones that would be brought back, humans, and even Lycaon who will obviously return - Willy doesn't believe it) he passes away after having found some sort of renewed faith in the world (seeing all those people coming to the Monastery and tending to their daily lives, looking after orphans, etc etc). So obviously, when he's brought back at the end of SS and sees Adrestia, targeting Seiros/Rhea, he loses it and becomes an extra kind of asshole (a tru hresvelg).

I agree with you though, maybe add a bit of "savages" and "ungrateful barbarians" here and there, but I don't think Willy is even going to listen to reason or even try to listen at all (like a tru hresvelg) anyone who descends from an Elite.

Maybe after those two mini-bosses, Seteth would say that those "persons" were not the ones they were in life, and how the Crest (crusts are to blame!) warped their personalities, only for Flayn to follow with a meaningful "..." - opening a lot redshit threads for fans to "give their own version" lol

---

And for extra useless completionist stuff, like, if you picked the "Nabatean" option in the Sothis paralogue when Supreme Leader asks you who was lived in the Red Canyon, got a C+ support with Supreme Leader and went to her coronation, fought her using Billy and the Nabateans (with the famous "your ears are pointy you cannot rule over humans"), have both Billy and the Nabateans fight against Thales and Billy had a A support with all Nabateans, after Jerry and Willy's death, Berserk!Rhea would unleash a large scripted AoE on the map, empty husk!Lycaon could appear on the map, maybe as a white beast like creature on steroids, but who looks more like the IO than a regular White Beast (he has arms and wings?), who starts on the opposite side of the map and goes in your direction, but unlike the other white beasts, damaged dealt on Rhea won't be reflected on him.

Obviously, if the party kills him, Berserk!Rhea suddenly gains "Wrath" - but if you stall too much, empty!husk Lycaon has stats to ruin your party (unlike Willy!). Also if he dies then A support or no A support Rhea doesn't survive.

(And maybe if you accidently kill him, Billy gets "!" box popping up, with a new use of "Divine Pulse" coming out from nowhere, as it's Sothis' way to ask them to find a way not to kill him)

Billy will reveal what that unit is, idk, maybe they're closing their eyes and say that they are only a body animated by idk, the resonating power of the IO's Crest - but their true spirit has been long gone, now only remains a body and the rage it had before passing away. Then Billy opens their eyes, and says they would have wanted to meet him under other circumstances (but who is talking? Billy? or Sothis?)

Flayn despairs seeing her "cousin" (confirming her ties to Rhea!) in this situation, apologises for not having been able to be there for him, idk, like she promised too, but this time, she will.

Seteth too is saddened and while he wonders how many members of his family he will have to kill today, he tells Lycaon that this is final lesson, so he better remember it.

Ah, and in this revamped SS finale (since we're in AU land!), Relics work like Devil Weapon against Rhea and Lycaon - damage isn't dealt to the foe, but to your unit instead! And if your unit survives, the Relic insta-breaks (as a gameplay mechanic like 0 uses left).

End of the fight, Rhea survives (?), there is some ending blurb about every White Beast who wasn't defeated vanished "as if they were finally put to rest", that S support is revamped to have Rhea more or less say she has to move on now and cannot be stuck in the past, and has to let the past "rest in peace" to finally move forward - both for her and the one shes so dearly misses (ending line would be Billy in brackets musing how rare it is to see Sothis smile).

Ultimate bonus if this is the last route you play (or finished all the other routes), and if you got this ending, you'd have a special scene at the end, of Rhea and Billy waving hands at an assembly composed of all BE students (some of them waving back! even Bernie!), members of staff/knights, some randoms, but also, 11 randos with green hair and pointy ears, idk, wearing tunics with their emblems to know who they are, Willy (back to his bright and stupid self) carrying kid!Lycaon (with his pointy ears!) on his shoulders, some other random woman next to Flayn with a matching haircut, Manu pulling at Seteth's pointy ear (if they got their A+ support, else he frowns like usual), ghost!Jerry and ghost!Sitri waving too, and adult!Sothis (all the ghosts are transparent like, save for adult!Sothis - again, it would have been made on purpose by the devs who wondered if that would have created fanwank about Sothis' state, dead or alive?).

Not to say ghosts are real in Fodlan, but it would be some sort of representation that both dead and living people are happy to see a world where both humans and Nabateans can live together - even if they're dead, their dreams live on, or some stuff like that.

But of course, to get this ending, you'd have to get the most out of Supreme Leader's beliefs and the general intolerance that permeated Fodlan since, well, the Red Canyon, but even before (the first agarthan war?).

[randomnameless]

2 weeks later

They were probably close friends! I think Edelgard's actions did hurt Rhea so much because of the reasons outlined above, but over and on top of that, this is a betrayal from the descendent of her friend, the friend that she trusted enough to give her Crest to

Willy mention!

Bear in mind that during CF's final map - the one where our beloved Supreme Leader accuses her of hating human and humanity because she is a nabatean, but that was cut with the localisation for some reason - what are the names of the golems fielded in Firdhiad?

Chevalier - an apostle - Luca - a saint - and a bunch of other people we don't know but... one of the golem is named Wilhelm!

ergo, when Rhea is at her worst (tm) at least mentally, she relies on golems named after people who are/were pretty close to her, the apostles who helped her try to resurrect her mom once, a saint (we don't know what was her relation to Saint Luca) and... Willy, a human.

Interestingly, if you used Supreme Leader to fight her in the previous map, the "human hating Rhea" mourns having to fight Supreme Leader because... Supreme Leader is Willy's descendant, and 1k years later, to Rhea, Willy is still the guy who "supported and saved" her.

Fun fact, Nopes amped it up to 11 so much that whenever you pit Rhea (NG+ and in the history maps?) against Supreme Leader, Rhea always mentions Wilhelm, noting her resemblance to her 1k years long dead ancestor, or wishing he was still around.

To Rhea, the Hresvelgs are first and foremost, Willy's descendants and she has high expectations from them, or at least expect them to act in a way that would not shame or be contrary to what Willy himself once did, or would have done.

Which is why she takes the betrayal from House Hresvelg, especially, very bad, Nopes also gave some voice to Seteth and Flayn about being betrayed by the descendants of the ones they trusted but it feels less "personal" than Rhea's -

But let's not kid ourselves, the reason why she goes ballistic in CF isn't only because Willy's scion goes haywire, but because Sitri's kid - who might be or not her mom - tries to kill her or at least sides with Nemesis v.2.

So to comment on your original post @lumeha, Rhea is hurt in CF (and potentially in the other routes too, but since Billy and some humans are still on her side it's less pronounced) because - as she says it in her last battle quotes - she is betrayed again by humanity after having trusted them again.

Unlike her avian bro, she didn't fig away saying humanity sucks after the War of Heroes, no. Rhea remained because she cares about humans and Fodlan - both as her duty commands, as Sothis' proxy but also, I believe, on a personal level.

As you noted, she cares - loves? as much as she can given her special situation - humans and... CF/Flamey stuff is how they reward her lol - which is why the perceived betrayal hurts so much, and why she is so angry/disappointed/upset.

Thinking about it, like, genuinely, I think characterising Rhea as someone who hates humanity because of her reaction to Edelgard in the Holy Tomb... misses the fact that, for me, she can only react that strongly to what she sees as betrayal because she cares about humans as a whole. That's why it sends her into a spiral. That's why it hurts her to the point of anger : because it stabs her with pinpoint accuracy into the still bleeding parts of her, the part of her that is the only survivor of Zanado. The part of her that was beaten bloody open and to a pulp by humans who were greedy for power and didn't care who they killed in the process.

It feels to me like this is exactly why she gets so deeply affected by this - because she did put a lot of her chips on the bet that humans are better than Nemesis and the Agarthans. To the point of sparing the children of her enemies, their families, their clans. To the point of repeatedly opening her home for them.

That's... not the behaviour of someone who despises humanity

Is she letting herself be close to people ? No. But does that mean she doesn't care for them ? No, not at all. She is just. Closed off. That's not the same as not caring.

[friedrich-2]

Hello, I'm a Napoleonic Era fan who's interested in learning more about Frederick William III (and his wife)!

I've been struggling to find resources as language barriers have proven difficult (I am an English speaker), and Frederick just doesn't get enough coverage like other Napoleonic figures.

You're the only Frederick enthusiast I can find on this site, so I'd love to hear any facts you have about him or any resources/articles/books if possible!

I'd love to learn more about the Hohenzollern dynasty in general, they seem like interesting folk! :-)

Hallo! I'm very happy to talk about Friedrich Wilhelm III and Luise :D

First, let me direct you to my partners blog @waifu-napoleon! They also have a lot of information about Friedrich.

The books I am usually reading are unfortunately all in German, and I can't really find any useful information on English books. Sorry! But I can provide translated book passages on my blog, which I will soon resume (hopefully sooner than later).

10 little facts about Friedrich:

1. He had a very funny/abrupt way of talking. My tag '#Frederick Williams speech pattern' has a few examples of this, where I loosley translated quotes from my books.

2. Directly after the battle of Jena-Auerstedt, he was evading French troops for 26 hours, without food and only his horse as a companion. He was awake the entire time and was asking around in villages for the nearest safe city where he then collapsed as soon as he knew he was safe.

3. He was always seen as a bit weird and "dry", even around his troops in his days as crown prince. But everyone directly noticed a change in his behaviour as soon as he and Luise were engaged. He seemed happier and more relaxed, and even made "dirty" jokes, which Luise taught him in their letters to each other.

4. When he and his family where in exile in Königsberg in East Prussia, he apparently liked to go swimming in the Baltic Sea.

5. In general the Royal family liked to play "hit the pot" or "blindsman buff". I'd like everyone to picture Friedrich Wilhelm, crawling on the floor with a blind fold around his eyes, trying to hit a pot. Possible getting attacked by his kids because we all know if dad is already on the ground, it's the best way to tackle him even further (it was stated in my books that he did roll around with his kids on the floor).

6. Luise and him had a little summer residence called "Paretz". In there, they had three rooms for themselves: his office, her living room and their shared bedroom (which was very uncommon in that time, that a royal couple would share a bedroom). The other rooms were for the kids, dining, balls, servants etc.

7. He liked uniforms very much, so much so that when he was still a younger crown prince, he would try different ones on in his room in secret.

8. He stuck a rowanberry up his nose when he was a kid and was scolded by his teacher for it.

9. His relationship with his father was very bad. His father said upon hearing of Friedrich Wilhelm's birth that he wished "that thing would've never seen the light". So Friedrich actually grew up without having felt proper love towards himself most of his life. His father preferred his kids from his other wives and mistresses. But when he died, Friedrich Wilhelm let his way younger half-brothers and sisters come before him and Luise and said: Look, these are my father's other kids. I shall love them like they're my own.

10. He hated tragedies, whether as books or as plays. He preferred lighter stories and used them also to distract himself from bad situations. When one of his and Luises sons died young, he went to the theatre for example. He often just sat between the common folk and tried to blend in with them by wearing a simple black coat.

And a bonus fact I just remembered!

Friedrich hated being the centre of attention. So much that he often tried to get to places unseen, such as when he was still a crown Prince. Him, his brother and his father were staying in a city and were supposed to be picked up the next morning by carriages and bought to their military camps while the attention of the city was upon them. But Friedrich snuck out of his room and went all the way by foot an hour earlier so he could get away without being seen or noticed.

So... those were a lot of facts about him haha. I hope I could somewhat help, but feel free to always ask more, I am always happy to talk about him!

[storm-and-starlight]

farewell, wanderlust

I don't know if I'm ever gonna finish this fic or even even really post it, but just like Meteoric, here's a section that I think stands well alone and that I really quite like. Dick finds Jason post-Bruce's "death" in Final Crisis. Operates off of UTRH movie canon.

Dick had the courtesy to find him in person, plainclothed, appearing out of nowhere at a tea shop Jason still stops in at, sometimes. It's one of the places Alfred buys from, a sharply astringent Earl Grey -- Jason, he'd said, low and soft at his shoulder, and Jason had turned on his heel and left without paying, boots thumping oddly on the cobblestones (Old Gotham, god, he hates this part of the city, pretending like the battered streets and ancient buildings are somehow charming, pretending it's someplace sweet and touristy and safe, pretending like it hasn't got just as much rot as the rest of the place -- Scarecrow attacked this street six months ago, gassed half the market, and now all that's left of that is a handful of signs in various shops saying "respirators sold here!"), chilled to the bone even in the summer swelter. The city had already recovered from the alien invasion or zombie apocalypse or whatever-the-fuck-it-was that had the League all over the place a week ago; the rest of the world might still be reeling, but not Gotham.

Jason! Dick had said, loud and surprised, and then gentler, cut to carry, Jay, little wing-- and Jason had frozen where he stood, middle of the street, crowd splitting around him like a running river until Dick had found him again. He'd been dressed in civvies: black tee, battered leather, worn jeans, perfectly nondescript. Hair a wild tumbledown mess, windblown and ragged. Hadn't slept in at least three days, but he'd had a bright-burning clarity to his eyes; Nightwing, clinging on to sanity when the rest of the world's gone mad.

Jason hadn't seen him this close up in years -- he'd been a shadow at Bruce's heels, a bright figure against the skyline, always at least arms-length and the barrel of a gun distant.

He was-- so much shorter than Jason thought he remembered.

Don't, Jason had said, sharp -- there's a gun under his jacket and Dick's here in civvies and this is Gotham, after all, what's a little mid-street-weapon-pulling to a native, and Dick had said We need to-- we should talk.

So talk, and Dick had flicked a glance out at the heaving crowd around them and said not here. At-- do you remember Wilhelm? and Jason does, only a single bright flash of a memory but still there despite the holes the Pit ate in his head -- Dick, younger and shaggy-haired and larger than life, dangling one-handed from the talons of the saddest damn gryphon Jason's ever seen, grinning up at him; "second-best hiding spot in the city, little wing" -- and he jerks his head in a nod.

Midnight, Dick had said, and swirled back into the crowd before Jason could even acknowledge that, gone again in the current of humanity.

He'd paid for the tea, too, the bastard.

---

He arrives at Wilhelm's corner at sixteen minutes past the stroke of midnight -- there was a church here once that still rang the hour every hour, Westminster quarters marking out the passage of the night. It's gone now, nineteenth-century masonry apparently not up to the task of surviving an earthquake (a goddamn earthquake, what the fuck) but he can still hear the ghost of it, echoing over the years. All through this hour, Lord be my guide. Wilhelm's still standing, leaning gloomily over the street, but the gap between his wings is empty -- even the replacement's too big to fit, now. Nightwing's waiting on the roof instead, a dark shape silhouetted against the orange sky, lantern-light bleeding the color from his insignia. Batman's nowhere to be seen.

"Jason," Nightwing says when he lands beside him, heavier than any Robin has a right to be.

Jason snorts. "What happened to no names in the field? The old man leaves for a week and all the rules go out the window?"

Dick-- flinches.

Jason pauses. Bruce is still off on League business -- another day, another dollar, another planet-ending threat -- and he hasn't come back yet, leaving Nightwing and Robin to keep an eye on Gotham. He'd assumed it was just-- cleanup, like usual after shit like this goes down, or maybe he was off in space chasing down the guy who did it, but this is-- this is Dick naming him Jason, full-formal, not the name he took to scare the shit out of Bruce or the tattered remnant of a childhood he can't even remember.

"What happened?"

"Bruce--" Dick says, and falters, and stops. 

There's a siren in the distance, wailing away; the rattle of old and ill-maintained ventilation systems; the clacking rush of the train going through. The ghost of ringing bells, long-gone and buried; the salt-sting of the Pit in his eyes; grave-dirt under his nails and on his tongue -- all through this hour.

"How?" he says, and the helmet flattens it, turns it into just another electronic snarl, but he hears the scrape of a shattered voice anyways.

"Darkseid," and well, okay, Jason does have to admit that motherfucking Darkseid probably is one of the only people who ever could have done it. The Joker sure as hell wasn't fucking going to.

"Are you..."

"I-- saw the body." Jason's silent for long enough that Dick says "Jay," reaching out for his shoulder -- Jason twitches back and away, sharply, and Dick's hand drops limply back to his side.

"So he's dead, then," and it rings flatly in the air, the blade striking, the hammer coming down. "The fuck am I supposed to do about it?"

"Jay--" Dick says again, but Jason's got salt under his tongue and the Pit in his blood and he can feel the anger rising. "What, I'm supposed to-- say I'm sorry? Sit politely at the funeral? Come home? Have you forgotten that I'm not fucking one of you anymore?" The warehouse, the Joker, the gun -- I would have done nothing but search the planet for this pathetic pile of evil, death-worshipping garbage and sent him off to hell! -- Batman, walking away.

"Jason," Nightwing snaps, sharp and furious and Bat-vigilante to the bone, and then he sighs and he's right back to Dick Grayson again, trying to carry the weight of the world and not quite managing. "Jason, I-- you deserved to know."

He can hear what Dick's not quite saying underneath: you were Robin, once.

You were still his son.

The silence echoes.

"Alfred?" Jason asks, eventually, when the seethe in his blood isn't quite so strong.

"He's... holding up," Dick says carefully. "Better than I was, at first, but..." He rolls his wrist outward, a restless motion. "You know how he is."

"Yeah."

The Gotham quiet -- which isn't actually quiet in any sense of the word, just a constant background hum of trains and traffic and police sirens and the odd intermittent scream -- filters back in. It sounds different than it used to, though maybe that's just the brain damage. He misses the bells, every hour on the hour -- he can hear Alfred's voice humming Big Ben's prayer along with the chimes of the Manor clocks. All through this hour Lord be my guide, that by Thy power no foot shall slide. A good prayer for Robins, he'd called it, if you're going to be running about on rooftops in the middle of the night, and Jason had never quite believed the way Catherine once had but he'd still sung along at midnights, fleet-footed and sure on the spires and skyscrapers.

"I'm sorry," he says, at last.

Dick doesn't look at him. "Me too."

---

The dawn finds him still awake, leaning over the chipped counter of his latest base with a mug between his hands -- Earl Grey with rosemary and rose, an indulgence, a memory -- the warm golden haven of the Manor kitchen with all the windows black-backed mirrors in the predawn darkness, Jason bleary-eyed and up entirely too early and Alfred as crisply put together as ever, pouring water over tea leaves and letting the steam curl sweet and sharp up into the air -- it had been special, somehow, though now he can't remember why. The smell of the tea Dick paid for is the same, even all these gaping years later -- black tea and rose and bergamot, sweet and sharp -- and he closes his eyes tight, trying to shut out the salt in them still.

[ya-zz]

This is really important to me because my own parents don’t support me so I want you to write it.

Could you write a trans ftm reader coming out to Ana, Reinhardt and Soldier, I need the comfort and acceptance.

Thank you sm Yazz, I love youuu.

This means so much to me that you would trust me to write something like this. I hope I have done this some justice and I hope it doesn't make you cry too much my love. ♥

(lets ignore Torb and Reyes in this gif, okay? Okay.)

Ana / Reinhardt / Soldier x Trans FTM Reader

Word count: 1665

The thought had been weighing you down for months. For years have you felt that you were in the wrong body, never really fit in with the other women. Never really fit in anywhere, but being at Overwatch made you feel like you were home. Surrounded people who always had your back, whether in battle or on base recuperating for the next assignment. Overwatch was home. 

Sitting there, wide awake at 3am made you wonder when the right time to say something was. Of course, keeping silent meant that everyone still referred to you by your deadname, the pronouns you had grown to hate. That wasn’t you, never had been. You hated your body, the female traits that you had grown to hate and the chest that you bound so you seemed more masculine, more like you. 

You had to tell someone before it eats you alive. 

Pulling off the blankets from your body, slipping into something more comfortable, you head out of your living quarters and seek one person out. One person you knew who’d be understanding no matter the circumstances, someone who would be awake at this time. 

The anxiety was at an all time high as you wander the base halls. The lights flickering above you as you walk, the hum of the electricity flowing to the next light. You try to keep as calm as you could, feeling your body tremble as you near the mess hall, but all movement stopped just beside the entrance when you hear the one woman you needed to speak to laughing. 

Only when another laugh roared out alongside hers did it break a smile on your face. 

The woman hushed the laughing man before speaking. “Don’t be scared, come on in.” 

With a slight hesitation, you enter the room, seeing both Ana and Reinhardt sitting on the sofa. They look over at you standing in the doorway. 

“What ever is the matter?” Reinhardt speaks up, German accent thick and a look of concern on his face as he sees the worry in yours. 

“You look absolutely petrified.” Ana remarks. She pats the space between the two of them, signaling for you to come and sit beside them. “Come, what’s on your mind, sweetie?” Her voice was so soft, you swear you could listen to her talk for hours, no matter the subject at hand. 

Sitting between their bodies, you look down at your hands that were clasped together, a tight grip that made your knuckles white. 

Reinhardt adjusts his position, they both did as they sat straight, looking down at you with nothing but concern. 

“Is everything okay?” Reinhardt places a hand on your back, the size difference enough to make you feel smaller than you already were. 

“I… I need to tell you something.” You start, your body beginning to shake once more, then the rambling begins. “I- I was only planning on telling you, Ana. I didn’t think you’d both be in here. I’m worried about what you’d think of me after I tell you, scared you might not want to work with me anymore. You two… You two have been better parents to me than my actual parents and you’re not even my parents. I consider you two to be, though, oh god I really do… I feel safe with you two…”

“What’s wrong?” Ana places her hand just beneath Reinhardts on your back. Her other hand resting on top of your hands that were shut so tight around each other that it was hurting you. 

Then there was a knock at the door. “Am I intruding?” 

“Jack? What are you doing up so late?” Ana turns around to see commander Morrison stood in the doorway, sleep evident in his eyes. 

“You can hear Wilhelms laugh from across the base.” Jack moves his way around the room, heading straight for the coffee machine. “You know I’m a light sleeper, Amari. Besides, it’s a sleepless night for me.” His hands wrap around the mug, feeling the warmth in his palms. 

“Seems like there’s a lot keeping us awake tonight.” Ana chuckles. 

“What’s wrong, kid?” Jack moves to sit on the other sofa that was directly across from you. His eyes were tired, yet they were soft. 

Reinhardt's hand moves on your back, rubbing up and down, soothing that anxiety almost instantly. 

Now there were three of them surrounding you, but you didn’t feel uncomfortable at all. You felt safe being around those three. Ana, Reinhardt and Jack… Three soldiers who have had your back since the very first day you arrived, taken care of your wounds and made sure to bring you home safe from every bloody assignment. 

Tears stream down your cheeks almost immediately. The overwhelming feeling of being safe, feeling the unconditional love from these three have finally come crashing down on you. 

“Did I do something?” Jack questions, though there was a smile on his face. 

“No- no. You haven’t done anything.” You laugh, wiping the tears away with the cuff of your sleeve. 

“Why are you crying, dear?” Reinhardt speaks softly, hand not ceasing movement in soothing you. 

“I just…” You sigh. You’re here now, there’s no going back. 

All three of them are looking at you, waiting for you to speak. They don’t force you, they keep quiet. Jack sips his coffee, Ana keeps her hand on top of yours with her thumb soothing your knuckles and Reinhardt keeps rubbing your back. 

It’s now or never…

You hesitate, keeping your head down. “I’m trans.” 

There was a deafening silence. You felt like you couldn’t breathe, the room was starting to spin but one voice broke you out of that trance. 

“What do we call you?” Ana asks. 

“What…” You blink, looking up at her. 

“Your name. What’s your name?” She smiles at you. 

“[y/n].” You say. Your name. Not your deadname, not the name your parents so called “gifted” you with. Your name. 

Ana repeats your name, almost a confirmation to her and her smile never wavers. She lets go of your hand and pulls you into a tight embrace. 

“Forgive us.” She speaks. 

“You haven’t done anything wrong.” You laugh, holding onto her and sobbing. 

“It must’ve been years you’ve felt this way.” Her hand rubs the back of your head. “You’ve put up with us referring to you incorrectly for so long, and for that we owe you an apology.” 

“No- no, please, don’t. I just… Didn’t know what to say or when to say it.” Your hands hold onto her, face buried into the crook of her neck. 

“Then forgive us should we call you your old name.” Reinhardt speaks out, his hand returning to your back. “It’ll be a learning curve for us too.” 

You shake your head as you pull away from Ana. “No, please don’t feel bad if you do.” 

Reinhardt doesn’t waste anytime in pulling you in for a hug either. His larger form enveloping you, almost swallowing you in his arms. He was warm. 

“We love you for who you are, [y/n].” Ana speaks, using your name. It sounded so real, so sweet coming form her. “We know the hardships you have been through. You are family here.”

“Overwatch is family…” You say, muffled against the larger mans chest. 

“Overwatch is home.” Reinhardt says, looking over at Ana with the largest smile she had ever seen. 

Jack, meanwhile, was sat watching this entire scene play out. His own smile was hidden behind the mug of coffee that had long since gone cold. He watched as you cried in their arms, watched as they both hugged you together, almost like a mother and father would do to their child. 

“Suppose I better get some paperwork sorted.” He finally speaks. 

You, Ana and Reinhardt look at him which throws Jack off guard. 

“What?” He chuckles. “You want this official, kid?” Jack looks over at you and sees you nod, the sweetest smile on your face. “Then I will make it official.” 

“Thank you.” Your voice was soft, tears in your eyes as you watch the commander stand up. He walks over to you and wraps his arms around you. 

“You’re brave kid, strong too. We need you.” He says in your ear. “Welcome to the team, [y/n].” 

–

Days had since passed since you came out and you were already drafted for the next assignment. Reyes, Cassidy, Ana and Genji were there too, all of you seated around the table as Morrison debriefed you on what was happening. 

“[y/n], you’ll be on security.” The commander speaks. 

Cassidy and Genji look over at each other before the cowboy speaks out. “Who’s [y/n]?” 

“Me.” You say proudly. 

“Well I’ll be damned.” Cassidy smiles. 

Genji nods, a smile also on his face. 

“It’s about time.” Cassidy jests, looking at you and winking. “Had an inkling about you.” 

“Don’t say it like that-” You laugh. 

The cowboy grins from ear to ear before tipping his hat to you. 

“You could tell with him but can’t tell when that damn archer is flirting with you?” Reyes chimes in. 

That sparks an argument between Reyes and Cassidy, Genji sinking further into his seat as he tries to hide, not wanting to hear the absurdities coming from the pair. 

Ana looks over at you as you’re watching the two men argue, a smile on your face, cheeks flushed from the happiness inside. Jack was too busy trying to get those two to shut up, their voices getting louder, but that didn’t matter to you. 

You were accepted among them, even if the entire base didn’t know yet. Those that mattered most to you accepted you without any questions or hesitation. It was going to take some time for everyone to get used to your new name and pronouns, but you were just so overwhelmed with loved and acceptance that you didn’t care. 

For once, you felt like you belonged. You were home.

Overwatch is home…

—

KOFI

[youngroyals-hc]

The meeting between Simon, Wille, Linda, Jan Olof and Minou finished 5 minutes ago, and Wille all but yanked Simon out of the room towards his bedroom. Gone was the quiet easiness from when they had been in there just hours before; now Wille was furious, face tight and hands clenched into fists. He closes the door hard, not quite slamming it but getting close, immediately walking towards the window then pacing back to his bed. Simon hovers by the door, watching his boyfriend stalk around the room cautiously. Eventually Wille looks up at Simon and wilts, stopping in his tracks and letting his shoulders fall away from his ears. Simon walks over to him, gently taking his wrists and unfurling his fingers, lacing them with his and pulling them between their chests.

"Sorry, Simon. I know I shouldn't get so mad but, fucking hell they piss me off so much. How can they ask so much of you! Of your mama! They're just doing this to mess with-"

"Wille," Simon says steadily.

The prince quickly looks up to his lover's gaze, and once again he melts, meek and sheepish from letting his anger boil up again.

"I knew this would be difficult, and that they would ask things that I really didn't want to do. But Wille, you have to understand that I know all that and I still choose to love you. You can't change who you are, just as much as I can't change who I am. And I choose you, all of you. Not just Wille, but also Kronprins Wilhelm, because I love you, and I know that you hate being who you are and what they expect from you. If you didn't, I wouldn't love you. So, yeah, they're being shitty and stubborn. But we can be stubborn right back. They don't even know how annoying I can be when I put my mind to it."

Wille just stares right into Simon's soul as he monologues, in that intense way that makes many people uncomfortable but that Simon absolutely loves. He stays quiet for a while, before a small smile tugs at the corner of his lips.

"What is it my love?" Simon asks gently.

"You sure can be annoying when you want to be, so I guess I believe you," Wille chuckles and Simon smacks his shoulder.

"I say all this, and that's all you can respond with!"

Wille cracks into laughter and pulls Simon into his chest, kissing his head where it buries into his neck.

"You know I'm only teasing Simmeeeee."

"You better be," Simon grumbled into his skin.

Wille pulls back, tilting his boyfriend's chin upwards and placing a searing kiss on his pouting lips.

"I will choose you always, Simon. Whatever I can do to make it easier for you to keep choosing me, I will make it happen. I'll fire every annoying aide in this palace if I have to. I'm not going to fuck up and lose you again, and I'm not going to ask you to do anything to change who you are," Wille says, lips only centimetres away from Simon's.

Now it was Simon's turn to melt, hands curling into his boyfriend's hair to pull him back to his lips.

"Jag älskar dig, Simon," Wille whispers against his lips, and Simon knows then that no matter what, they would be okay.

[im-a-king-baby]

hi ! first of all; i read ELYN over the easter weekend and stayed up till like five am waiting for it to get happy so i could sleep (i gave up) and i loved it so so much. It just feels like such a tangible, realistic outcome for them (if we ignore s3) it made me ache in that exact anxious yearning way the actual show does. Big ask and 100% appreciate it if the answer is no but are you planning to write more for them in that universe? Would love to see them when Wille is at university, or see Wille simply make some (oblivious?) uni friends, or see Sara and Simon interact again or honestly literally anything and everything.

secondly, and who knows maybe (probably) you’re aware of this but the photos/images in the fic do not appear as images but just as a text/error box? Is that intentional or did they break? I kept finding myself curious as to what image was put with the chapters haha

Hi!!! I hope you had a good easter... and went to sleep at some point... 😅

Thank you for alerting me about the images! I was not aware of that :( Although I guess that makes all those hours hardcoding the text threads and tumblr posts so they would work without images worth it 😂

I have gone through it all again and updated the image links so they are working for me now (let me know if they're still broken for you?).

There's nothing in them that's required to follow the fic, you just get to judge the time I spent procrastinating by making album covers and then sorting all the random pop songs I'd invented into albums (something that was definitely vital even though no one but me cares about the difference in vibe between Simme eras 🤣).

If you are just interested in the art, these are the 4 covers I used in the fic:

Sadly this fic was always destined to lose canon status after season 3 (although I am going to keep believing August's arc could go the ELYN route until proven otherwise).

Regarding sequels, prooobably not? Sorry :( I have more notes for Simon pov scenes during and before than anything set after because I'm not sure what more I have to say, (other than wanting to write something of ELYN Wille with Edvin's new haircut but basically all I've got is this:

For a moment Simon thinks Wilhelm isn’t even here, then the bleached blond head turns and it’s Wilhelm’s face and Wilhelm’s eyes and Wilhelm’s mouth dropping open in surprise at seeing Simon in the doorway. “You’re here,” Wilhelm says. “How are you -?” “You cut your hair.” It’s dumb. Obviously. But Simon hasn’t slept and Wilhelm’s hair is almost white, sharp and bristled, and Simon wants to touch it, to see if it hurts. “I…” Wilhelm hesitates. “There were always rules about my appearance, about how I was allowed to look, and I thought…” he reaches a hand to his hairline, his face falling a little. “Do you hate it?” The bristles give under his fingers, impossibly soft. He looks older, but also somehow younger, like he’s reclaiming the rebellious teen years that the crown never let him have. “I want to kiss you,” Simon says. The coffee shop is full of people. At least four that Simon can see are looking at them, not even trying to be subtle. There’s a camera tilted in their direction, but it’s not close. “Can I kiss you?” “I-” Wilhelm starts doing the same glance - who’s watching, who’s filming - then seems to catch himself, snorts a soft laugh and pulls Simon in. It's too short for Simon to catch hold of, but he can run his fingers through it and it's soft or ghost them over to catch the sharp edges of the tips, and it's Wilhelm and he's here, they're both here. And they're going to be okay.

<3

[rose-and-clover]

Writing tag game!

Thanks, @jordensgolde for tagging me. It was so fun to do <3

I guess it'll be about Young Royals mostly 🙂

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

four

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

50,790

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Now Young Royals

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

A Million Miles an Hour

Close-up, Action Line

We Are the Sound, We Are the Echo 

Parallax

5. Do you respond to comments?

Always. It’s the most important part for me after publishing. If a person spends their time reading and leaving a comment, I will always find a moment to respond. I highly appreciate comments and I’m endlessly grateful for each one. Comments do wonders

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I’m a happy-ending disaster. I’m a softie. I can't help it. 

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I think Million Miles an Hour, because I see them in long-term relationships. Like they will spend so many Christmases together

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Some kind of? But not YR fics though

9. Do you write smut?

Yes, I really enjoy it for so many reasons

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Oh, I like crossovers. I think the current one with Matrix can be called crossover and it’s the craziest

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not YR

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

They requested but never sent me a link so idk :(

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, but I would like to!

14. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I have one WIP that already is 30k long, about Wilhelm’s and Simon's alternative first meeting

Another one about a university trip.

And the current one, Parallax.

I really want to finish the last one and the trip au. They seem fun

15. What are your writing strengths?

Idk, really liking the process? haha

I've been told that I can immerse people in a scene. Make them feel, sense. Light, textures, tastes, scents.

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

Easily getting stuck in a loop of self-sabotage, thinking that my ideas can just stay in my head, there is no need to write fanfics at all

17. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Yes, I think I’m going to use Spanish for Simon one day. In that WIP about their first meeting I mentioned above, it was a few lines already

18. First fandom you wrote for?

K-pop

19. Favourite fic you’ve written?

Million Miles an Hour, I put a part of my soul in it

~~~

I think everyone did it. So if you see it and you want to participate, you can add me as the one who tagged you!

[review-anon]

I don't know if you remember this: post/766354865883660288/oooh-ooh-do-the-favorite-and-least-favorite, but I'd love to see a post where you add your favorites and least favorites for the three or so fangans you've watched since then.--Timeline Anon

//So since I did that post I have seen three Fangans since then; The After, Project Eden's Garden and Tetro Pink.

//As such I'm gonna talk who my fav and least fav characters are from those fangans as I am talking spoilers it will be under the cut.

The After

Favourite: Koin Hatoyama. I absoulately adore this guy as he's basically the lovechild of Himiko and Kokichi, being a magician who insists they have real magic where its all stage and illusionary play, while also being a chaotic gremlin who can cause chaos. Unlike Kokichi though, Koin can read the room and knows where something goes too far so his pranks and jokes never go too far and when they do, he immediately apologises. His interactions with Tachihaki are comedy gold and its such a blast to see these two together. I am deeply concerned he might be the BS Chapter 3 culprit but well...I will save my thoughts when eventually I do my The After Chapter 3 Daily Life write up.

Least Favourite: Ryohei Seki. Anyone who knows me knows that this guy is my least favourite Danganronpa character heck maybe one of my most loathed fictional characters PERIOD. Honestly this guy just pisses me off in so many different ways. The fact he's a poor man's Tsurugi. The fact he's a poor man's DAVID CHIEM, and basically tried to execute Tachihaki for not only very shallow reasons but the truth is the person he's "avenging" would probably hate Ryohei big time for doing it. Also how he treated Mitaru was pure disgusting as he used her like a damn tool and she paid the price for it. But what has put him firmly on my shit list, is he seems to be on a fast track to be the non-mastermind character from a fangan that is actually good to have the highest Killing Game Kill Count. We are on Chapter 3 and his kill count is on FOUR PEOPLE, and this number is set to go even higher.

Heck he's even responsible for why SDRA2 Chapter 4 went the way it did because there's no way LINUJ didn't watch The After's Chapter 2, thought Ryohei was doing a Nikei and decided to change things at the last second for fears of being seen of ripping it off. Thus the person who killed Nikei Yomiuri wasn't Sora, it wasn't Mikado, it wasn't anyone from the Another series, its this fucking justice obsessed cyncophobic fucktard. And had there been The After sprites pubically available well...he would be put through hell.

Which given how you guys know I don't mess around when it comes to punishments should be something you should be very afraid of.

Project Eden's Garden

Favourite: Ulysses Wilhelm. This guy is my fucking spirit animal and I'm all here for it, since a lot of people don't know but I'm a bit of a history nerd myself, plus I also relate big time for not having the best sleep schedule, this is why Pokemon Sleep is required so I can actually have more then 3 hours of sleep. I also feel like he knows a lot about Native American history, which could be why he and Wenona get along so well. Plus the fact he's a obessive note taker is vital for solving the class trails.

Of course I do not expect him to survive as he will die so the cast lose that vital intel, probably a Chapter 3 death and then I spend 600 hours dying to the culprit since that AA is the game from hell.

Least Favourite: Kai Monteago. I do not like influencers, I feel like they are a major reason why naraccism and cruelity are so rewarded in society as they alongside billionares is why in real life good does not win and evil doesn't always lose, in fact evil often gets away and dies peacefully whilest good people suffer and die. And Kai does NOT help the sterotypes as he's whinny, annoying and always having something nasty to say. What grinds my gears the most is the fact we spend more time then I would like in Chapter 1 with him and there's strong evidence to support he's gonna be our support character, which if he is kill me now.

Especially since it means he either dies in Chapter 5 or he's the fucker who will cost me the entire week to defeat since he goes full Queen Larsa and spams a million bullets of death at me. Now I HAVE heard that he is better in the FTEs and I am being too harsh on him, so who knows Kai mmight have the Mahiru problem where his redeeming qualities are locked to FTEs but the main story doesn't do him justice, but as of now he's the character I like the least.

Tetro Pink

Favourite: Mai Hayashi. The 2nd best Mai in existence of course she's not the best Mai since well kitten Mai always beats her out even when she confirms to the British sterotypes. Jokes aside Mai has always been such a boss as she's mostly been the most sane and rational person within the Killing Game, making the best decisions and stopping a lot of stupid shit that would have run its course in a normal Killing Game. Of course she isn't perfect as she had a servere lapse of judgement in Chapter 3, plus she has her own trauma about being kidnapped which I'm amazed how casual she takes the whole thing.

What I am really surprised about is her dynamic with Yanagi, now if you recall I didn't like this guy at all due to how much of a simp he is and he really needs to grow a backbone. Well, I can safetly say that the following chapters after I made that post did him serious justice as we know the context for why he's a simp and how much heartbreak he's been through, how he falls for Mai not because she's a woman, but because she's been there for him, and his frenemy relation with Hiroaki is very interesting. Obviously we all know either Mai or Yanagi are dying in Chapter 5 since there is no way these two are gonna make it out since its Maki and Kaito all over again, but the question is, who is dying?

Least Favourite: Biology Head AKA Kan Toranosuke. Probably the ONLY time I will ever say that fucktard's name but I often openly question why this guy even exists since well the Masterminds are horrible people, but I feel he was made specifically to be the most hateable bastard in existence. Like its not enough he's a sadistic monster who loves torturing others, he also happens to be every bigot you could think of, which I feel is completely unnecessary like this guy is already a piece of shit, why do we need to make him sexist, racist, ableist etc? The worst part? He's gonna completely get away with everything he does since a) Tetro Pink is Part 1 of a trilogy and b) I am seeing worrying signs the Tetro franchise isn't gonna have happy endings.

Well Biology Head I will say this...you might be able to cheat the system in universe and get away with your crimes there... but nobody escapes from me. NOBODY. Heck the fact I refuse to address him by his name speaks volumes since he's lost name privilages.

//And there you go! That's my favs and least favs done for the Fangans I've seen since that time. I will be back doing this when I have more under my belt but until then farewell!

[inspectorspinda]

Hello, hope you’re doing well! I wanted to ask: What’s your favorite scene from the Sister’s Grimm series? Or maybe which scene from each book do you think stands out as the BEST if you don’t want to compare the whole series?

Hey!

Hmmm that's a hard one. I haven't reread all the books yet and have only ever read the original versions so I'll do my best to answer. But my opinions might change as I listen to books 1-3 and 7 again.

The thing I remember the most from this book is the hang in there shirts x'D Maybe because it was such cringe it just burned a hole in my mind. But in terms of scenes I think probably going into the Mirror and getting magicked up to crash Charming's ball which was also kind of cringe because of how uncomfortable Sabrina was about the whole thing. She's crazy relatable as a protagonist. Probably one of the best in terms of female protagonists in children's books.

Finding the frog in the school after hours and then running from it. As a kid, being in a school being after hours feels so cool. Like you're getting special privileges or something, but also it is inherently creepy as a kid because this busy area is so dead and empty. Just that much makes it pretty cool, but then there's extra fear because the frog just shows up from nowhere and tries to kill them.

Maybe the opening with the Jabberwocky? I really can't remember anything about this book at all except the opening scene and the fact Uncle Jake shows up at some point. No clue what else happened in it. Is that a bad sign?

This is the first one I reread last year and my god Puck's emotional confession to Sabrina about how his father made him feel terrible made me start crying in public. And I don't even like Puck! He's probably consistently the least favorite part of these books alongside all the times Granny and Daphne behave unreasonably towards Sabrina. But that scene made me love him for 5 seconds.

I think as a kind this as the first book I actually guessed the ending and I felt so smart for that haha. There are so many great scenes in this book its hard to decide which sticks out the most. There's the time travel to the bad future, chasing Canis around and then BAM suddenly he's the wolf, redeemed Charming, sneaking into Heart's house to get Charming's mirror, Wilhelm showing up and Canis breaking him out, the climax with Tom and Cindy. Good shit.

Probably the book I reread the most as a kid because I loved Canis so much. Looking back, there aren't really that many stand out "events" presay. It is mostly the reveal of what exactly went down in the past that kept my attention. Maybe then I'll say it was the pig's story to Granny and Sabrina about how Canis first came to be? I seems like one of the jail scenes with Canis would be the stand out but since I've always loved these werewolf type tropes I've seen a lot more of them over the years and I'm kind of picky about them now haha. Canis's emotions aren't really developed beyond the obvious, "I feel bad and guilty."

When Sabrina knocked over the water tower? I remember this book so little that I can't even guarantee I'm not misremember that scene. I just know there was a fight scene and Sabrina did something with the water tower and won. I probably only read this book one time so it's not in my memory at all.

When Pinocchio's friend inside the book showed pride in his role, that made me tear up. Cause all the other characters hated it so much, to hear him speak genuinely about how important he saw his job was really sweet and I wish we got more. Other than that pretty much any scene with the Editor, he was awesome.

The end with Mirror dying and wanted Sabrina to say she was his friend made me cry in bed as a listened to the audiobook. WAhhhhhh. If I stop and think, that ending is flawed in many ways but it makes my smooth ape brain happy.

[devilishfink]

My head's in heaven, my soles are in hell

To sort that out right away... That won't be a fairy tail of good and evil, where the beautiful angels win over the ugly demons. Since that is will NEVER be the case! Sorry to bust that bubble, kid. 

This is a story about me, Wilhelm Fink and my little baby brother “The Reverend” Strychnine Twitch, a long story with ups and downs.

Anyways... the story starts 39 years ago in good old California. My birthday to be exact and not my favorite day of the year to be brutally honest.

The neon light in the waiting room caused more stress than an relaxing atmosphere, the whole room in its' whole didn't help that either. 

A man in his mid thirties was sitting there all alone in the middle of the night waiting to be called to the room he just wanted to enter so badly for hours now. 

The black-headed looked like he was sitting on glowing coals, shifting from side to side for quite a while now; “Oh come on that's a joke... I just wanna see how it is going... That's it!” his voice sounded more worried than angry followed by a long sigh, he got on his feet heading to the exit, to find out what caused the waiting. 

It took him like 5 minutes and several asking to finally find the right direction, how he hated this place; the smell of diseases, disinfectant and soon to be dead; he simply hated hospitals with a passion... but this time he couldn't care less about all that.

“There we go 'delivery room'” a little smile showed up on his face, like a little child before Christmas morning, then he pushed open the door to see what he waited for so long now, “so is everything alright with Laur- a- what?!” as fast as the smile had came it was gone replaced with a blank face of disbelieve “This can't be... what happened! That's too much blood!” 

So let's see... the nice man you heard scream here was my father. Lucius Fink. Full-time asshole and previous king of hell. Yes hell you read that right.

Probably this incident was the trigger for much more worse to come, but that's a story for later. 

More important is the Why now... Laura Schneider; my mother; was basically my first victim of many. I never meant to do so really, but humans ain't supposed to give birth to a demon, since this always comes with a sacrifice, which was her life in this case...

Lucius was standing in front of the big window wall, where they kept the newborns for the parents to take the first look at their little bundle of joy. The demon was pale as the tiles that paved the whole place: “How can life and death be so close together? It's not fair...” he never was a cry baby not even now he could, he tried to calm himself not to tear the place down with just one finger. “...Now where is he?” still a bit shaking her searched through the small beds, to finally find a blue one: “There you are... Wilhelm... she chose the name I picked? Oh dammit Laura...” he shoved his face into one hand and shook his head: “Be strong now Lucius... be a good dad for him.” The devil shook of the bad chills for now to greet the newborn boy with a happy face not with the face of despair. 

What a happy-happy birthday story right? He should keep his promise at least for some years... he USED to be a good father to me when I was still a little fuck. After all it wasn't my fault that Laura died and I never met her so I was never really sad about not knowing her. But she seemed like a really nice woman after the stories Lucius told me while looking at old photos.

I noticed that something was wrong when I was like three years old. That was the time where he disappear for days, leaving me and my babysitter alone... God that was terrible of you think about it. It turned out that he went to some shady night clubs; he was sad and lonely I don't judge him for DOING it but I do judge him for leaving a three-year-old alone with a babysitter. (also because Susie was a bitch of a babysitter...) Anyway. That was until one day he brought one of his kittens, he really loved to play with home.

Sally Twitch; a woman that really didn't look like your usual dancer. I know, I know the name sounds weird and a lil' stupid, but she actually happened to be a really pretty and sweet being and who was not as stupid as her name sounded. Even thought she worked in some shady bar, she was always happy and a really great substitute mother to me. Also father had his reason to call her his “Little angel”...

°What do you's want for dinner darling?° the blonde lady asked the little black-headed boy. 'Uuuuuuh... I want beef please!' a big cute but sharp smile appeared on Wilhelm's face. °... again? Honey you's can't only eat meat all the time° Sally laughed stroking the boy's head °I's will see what we's can do yes?° - “Well meat doesn't sound bad to me either actually” Lucius appeared out of thin air behind them hugging Sally from behind to put a kiss on her temple, he always appeared like that. Out of nowhere. He loved being a demon and doing well thing's a demon does. °Hello love, was your day okay?° she blushed a little, every normal person would have pissed themselves if someone would pop up like this. But that wasn't your normal family to start with anyways. 

The were like together for two or three years, much longer than with Laura to this point. And who would have thought THAT? (Everybody obviously) Sally got pregnant. Father was scared of course, we all know what happened the last time he expected a child of his, but since Sally wasn't a normal human, she told him not to worry about it and that everything will be just fine. One happy family and a happy end like the one's in children books or Disney movies. 

I wish it would have been like that all the time...

'Moooommmy why can't I come with you two? I don't like the babysitter and I want to see my little brother!' the little devil pouted, trying not to show that he was close to crying: 'That's not fair!' - °Ssssh it's okaaaay... we's wont be gone for long and you's can say hello to him in person then not just do my belly hehe...° Sally smiled warmly wiping the little one's tears away with her thumbs, while Lucius was loading her bag into the car. °You's will protect little Strychnine from this point then so you's need to be a strong big brother for him... promise?° - 'I-I will!' Wilhelm nodded trying to look strong: 'o-okay I will be a good boy while you are away...' Sally nodded °See you's later alligator.° - 'See you in a while crocodile!' He waved from the front door as his parents left.

The were gone for ages after that but it's not like I wasn't used to being left alone with a babysitter... This time BOTH of them came back home, with a really tiny version of father just with a much cuter face. I was all over the place that day since a baby brother was something I always wished for, even thought I didn't know that to this point of time. Strychnine wasn't exactly the pretties baby name but special names run in this family so why the fuck not? 

'Can I hold him? May I? Pleaaase!' Wilhelm never begged for anything but special times need special behavior: 'I will be careful. I will not drop him or anything he isn't a toy of mine so I-I promise!' - °Oh dear° Sally giggled, holding the little bundle gently in her arms: °Sit down beside me's and stay calm yes?° The little bundle of energy did as he was told and sat down on the couch, trying to sit really still: °Here you's go...° - 'Oh like- that?' - °Yes like that° The bundle was warm and calm on his lap, making little noises: 'He's so tiny... he will grow up fast so we can play yes? - °Of course Will. You's will be a great big brother for him... you's see my “kind” isn't as strong as yours. Keep him safe when I's can't be around okay?° the blonde one smiled warm but there was something like a little hint of  apprehension in it as well, what she didn't wanted to show and the little boy didn't notice anyway. 

I would kill to relive this nice years of my and Twitch's childhood! Growing up in a stable and happy family, that would have been great... But that only lasted for like 3 years I think? As time passed more and more demon's got informed, that father was living with an angel and his kids like a normal person. They saw it as a chance to jump right on the top of the throne in hell, since they thought he had become soft and weak. Lucius went out every night to get rid of those traitors, after one incident, where a demon almost broke into their bedroom to get rid of him and Sally as well I guess. The angel slowly started to lose all of the calm happiness and turned into a train wreck when it came to her emotions. Hell, she was alone with us children by night hoping nothing and nobody would break in, ending our lives for fun; as a game. Don't get me wrong! Angel's have weapons too! Mostly swords they can use to kill my kind, but Sally never had used hers'. She was afraid of hurting me or father by accident. In the end that would cost her, her pretty head. Literally.

Wilhelm and Strychnine were sharing the same bedroom, because of the latest event happening around the house. It had become to dangerous letting everyone sleep in single rooms, so Sally and Lucius decided to put the kids in the room beside their bedroom, to help them as soon as they could in case of  danger. “Wil? I's can't sleep...” the little voice interrupted the silence of the night: “May I's uhm...” - 'I don't mind hop in baby bro' the black-headed replied as he lifted his blanket for his little brother to join. He made the promise to take care of him and he loved doing it actually. How couldn't you by the look of that adorable face? For a three-year old he was already really smart, so he  knew as good as Wil, what was going on, and what could possibly happen to them. “You's think everything will be fine?” little Twitch sounded worried: “Will mommy be alright?” - 'Dad takes care of her so there is no doubt about that, I am sure!' the eight-year-old tried to calm him down, so both of them would get some sleep this night, when a loud noise suddenly echoed through the hallway. “What was that??” Strychnine pulled the blanket over his face, shivering. 'I don't know... stay here I will have a look.' Wilhelm was as stressed out as his little brother, but he didn't wanted to scare him even more. The little demon got up on his feet and opened the bedroom's door slowly peaking through it. He didn't had much demonic skills by now, but he already had the night vision which came in handy, when reading under his blanket by night. 'Mhmm...' entering the hallway caused a dull feeling in his stomach, like something was going as bad as it possibly could. '...What is this smell?' little Fink followed his nose to his parent's bedroom: 'Mom?' he pushed the already open door open to see inside revealing a nightmarish picture to the young demon. Inside was Sally leaning on the rooms wall, bleeding heavily from her stomach: °You's can't have them! Only over my's dead body!° she yelled into direction of one dark corner of the room, where a unfamiliar person stood, grinning dirtily. -Awww mother goose is scared? Hehe... well well nothing easier than this, since your fighting skills are non-existing and your oh so lovely man is occupied somewhere else with my minions.- the man had sharp claws and just as sharp teeth making his smile even more diabolic as his words. Fink backed away slowly and went back to his room, picking up Twitch he brought them into the wardrobe on the other side of the hallway. “I's don't want to be in he-” the demon interrupted him, shaking his head he gestured the little angel to be silent. ('You can hear me like this Strych?') being a supernatural species came with so many skills like telepathy, the two brother trained that as soon as Twitch could speak probably. They mostly used it to play hide and seek and playing tricks on their parents , but this time it was a good way to stay hidden from whoever he was.

(“I's can... what is happening?”) the curly haired boy clung to his older brother even tighter, hearing the banging sounds coming from his mother's bedroom. ('Dad will be here soon, I bet! He would never let someone hurt us li-') he was stopped by a loud bump hitting the door of the wardrobe. This smell... blood. Too much blood to be normal: °Don't... We's not hurtin' anybody please...° the voice of the angel sounded weak and so full of despair, knowing that she couldn't win against such a strong enemy. -Well you've got a pretty face and all... I don't blame him getting down on ya.- the voice of the stranger sounded almost cheerful. The man had taken grip around Sally's neck ready to snap her head of in just a second: -Maybe I will do that too before I take your last breath, how does that sound to you mother goose?- as soon as the sentence ended, there was a dragging noise into the direction of the children's bedroom. Wilhelm was just standing there pressing his hands on Strychnine's ears for the whole conversation, this time he couldn't overplay it. (“...A-are you's cryin'?”) some tears were dripping on the little one's head as the older one took a deep breath ('W-we stay in here dad will... he must...') where was he? He couldn't let this happen! Or could he? 

The house was covered in death silence for the rest of the night and the heavy smell of iron filled the hallway. Lucius nowhere to be seen...

This night our mother passed away, in a cruel and restless way... Sally did not deserve all this. We stayed in this fucking wardrobe for the whole night and Twitch was asking me over and over again, if everything would be fine and I told him father would come and safe us... This asshole can go rot somewhere worse than hell for leaving us alone this night. He came back somewhere around 10 in the morning, finding the angel in two pieces in our bedroom... I don't know who he was but he was one of the demon you would really call a monster. Next to my father of course. He started to slowly change as soon as Sally was underground and we were back home. For so many years he made us feel the pain he must have felt, but we were kids and not someone's punching bag! The angel knew why she told ME to take care of her son and not Lucius...

It was night again and as always the two brother's were alone in the big old house. 'We need to get you to the hospital, Twitch... c'mon!' the 13-year old tried to convince his smaller counterpart, who just had turned eight, to follow him downstairs to “fix” his father's birthday present: 'You can't heal yourself that well by now... please.' - “But I's... I-I's don't like that place Wil!” the little boy shook his head in dislike of his brother's idea: “Can't you's help me's with my arm?...” the emerald eyes grew bigger, hoping for an positive answer. The demon sight: 'I can only destroy, not heal. Only my own wounds baby bro.' - “B-But... mmmhm... fine.” The curly-headed boy followed grudged soon after and half an hour later they found themselves in the local emergency room. Not for the first time and not for the last. Twitch was holding his arm straight, shifting close to his brother's side, waiting for them to be called into one of the  consulting rooms: “I's will be fine?” - 'You will be. Don't worry.' - “If you's say so...” Fink smiled warmly at the little boy, trying to calm him. He wasn't the nice brother, not at all, except when it came to his little brother. Like a lion protecting his whelp. After a time that felt like hours they got to see a doctor; Twitch got a cast and Fink tried to make up a story again. This time he felt down the stairs. The two brother's were common visitor of the hospital by now, hell, they must have been really stupid not knowing WHAT was going on at there home with the little boy. “You's wanna write something on it?” the curly-headed boy wiggled his arm a little, trying to lighten the mood again. He was so lucky, not getting anything from his father but the face and the color of his eyes. Such an example for an angel. 'I will... uuuhm I will write bird brain on it yes?' - “Hey! That's not true!” the boy blew up his cheeks in disagreement: “I's not stupid, that's meaaaan...” - The young demon laughed: 'Just kidding! I am sorry I am nasty; that's my nature y'know?' - “You's ain't! At least not to me's.” - 'That's... true I think. You are the only thing that's important to me so'. They took the bus home, Twitch fell asleep, five minutes before they arrived at their stop: 'Don't you ever change yes?' the black-haired whispered picking his brother up to carry him into bed, without waking him up.

That story repeated so often, I stopped counting the times... At the point where I was 18 and Strych was 13, he sure had broken all his bones at least once. Luckily, he learned to heal himself pretty fast. At the same time, I planned leaving home to put an end to our father's torture. Even thought, I am creature that causes so much pain, I can't stand seeing my loved ones in pain. It makes me throw up, since it puts me back into the state I was in, while hiding in the wardrobe with Twitch as Sally was murdered... such a helpless state.

“But is there enough space for us?” Twitch was sitting on the edge of the couch in his purple, over sized hoodie, watching Fink getting his shit together: 'Yes there is. Just don't worry about all that, baby bro.' the demon smiled more stressed than warm this time. He just hoped for Lucius to stay out of the house all night again this time. 'Let's go now! My teleportation is still a bit bumpy but it's good enough to bring us two to our new home... come here and gimme a hug will ya?' the little boy nodded doing as his brother told him. He held on really tight, closing his eyes: “I's not going to puke after it right?” - 'Nope not at all... well maybe a little dunno haha!' with a cheeky smirk and without hesitation, Wilhelm let them both disappear into thin air to let them appear back in an cosy apartment. “You's lied to me's- urgh...” - 'Bathroom is the second door to the left there...' the curly-head ran off into said direction as soon as Fink had finished his sentence. The place was small but had many rooms, two small bedrooms, a kitchen, a bathroom and a living room. 

It wasn’t the best place to raise a child, but we both didn’t mind it. Everywhere is better than living with a man that holds a grudge against the world including his own children. Anyway. I could earn enough money by day with a shitty job at the supermarket- hell! I learned to hate people even more in this place!- and plenty of money from my demon job at night. Life was simple but it was good. Strych could be a child for a little bit at least… when I could keep him from asking questions about my nightlife. That was more than just not child friendly. He was still so curious about it that he ended up sneaking after me one night, even thought I told him not to do so several of times before…

Fink was getting ready for his “late shift” by putting on an all black outfit and a black and white stripped mask; this one he was really careful with since it was the only thing that hid his face from his “clients”: “I’s wanna come!” - ‘You cant… how many times have I told you that already Strych?’ the blonde head sticking through the door frame pouted in disappointment as the older one sighed and said the sentence like almost ever two or three days. It was just too dangerous and cruel for a little boy to join him. Hell- that job wasn’t one you could bring to class and talk about like a cop or firefighter would do. 'Please go to sleep… you’ve got school tomorrow.” a warm smile formed on the demons face as he leaded the boy back to his room, tucking him into his blanket with his plush animals: “I’s not tired at all…” Strych replied as a yawn followed his words, which made Fink grin amused: 'I see… It wont take long. Now- sleep tight little bean~’ putting a kiss on the blonde curls he got up to get his leather jacket and left the apartment to enter the dark night.

It didn’t take long for him to find the corrupted soul he had to send back to hell, after all he was a pure blood and much stronger and smarter than anyone with just a lousy pact. 'Any last wishes before I erase you from the surface of the planet? … not? Thought so!’ the devil short laughed as he held the mid-aged man against a brick wall by his throat with only one hand; he didn’t look like it at this point but he could take down grown up man without any trouble already now. With a smirk he lifted his tail showing the sharp end to the pale guy as he cut a straight line from his throat down to his belly, letting a waterfall of blood run down on the floor. Fink would never tell his little brother how good it felt to him, feeling fresh blood on his skin that wasn’t his own, one could compare it with a wolf finally starting to feed on a hunted deer. Pure satisfaction for one of his kind: 'The red is so pretty oh…’ a wide smirk formed on his face as he let the dead body slide to the ground to push his tail through it’s heart to let the corpses disappear into literal dust getting carried away by the wind.

Fink was covered in so much blood; and he loved it: 'That’s so goood~ but lets get rid of the mask now’ he chuckled and pulled it of to put it away into his jacket as he noticed a whimper behind his back, as he slowly turned around he immediately noticed the blonde short boy just standing there with tears running down his red cheeks: 'Strych?? what are you doing here? Please calm down it’s not what it looks like-’ before he could explain himself the little angel was already running of, down the dark sidewalks not really into a direction of something he knew. 'Shit!’ the black-haired started running after him, that wasn’t what he wanted his little brother to know about him; his cruel side; the side his father left him. 'Stop! Please! I am not evil towards you or anyone!’ Strych didn’t reply he just kept on running crying heavily because of the blood drenched scenery he found, which his brother had caused. “G-go away! Y-You’s the same monster as d-dad!” the little boy yelled from the top of his lungs which was loud enough to his his big brother like a straight shot into the guts. He wasn’t … it was his job! Or was it? Did he had the choice to quiet and live a normal life? There were so many doubts in his head now as he got slower and slower just looking blankly at his blonde counterpart.

“Leave me’s alone!” - 'I am … evil.’ the demon stared at his red hands and arms, trying to figure out the situation and what to do as he heard a dull sound like something had fallen. “Ow… my’s knees…” the angel had stumbled as he crossed the street making him fall and hurt his knees and cuttinghis pants open. 'Buddy I will hel- oh…’ the older brother bit his lips realizing that he had betrayed his only family really badly with not telling the truth: 'I am so sorry I can’t redo this and- FUCK GET UP!’ before he could really start his speech he noticed the lights of a truck coming down the street with way too much speed! And the little boy was still there not able to get up! Without hesitation the demon gained speed to push the little boy of the street onto the sidewalk: 'I am sorry!’ that were the last words before the truck hit Fink frontal, breaking his legs and one arm and pushed him on the edge of the street, just laying there unconscious: “Will! NO! Will!” Twitch crawled over to his brother shaking him to wake up but failed. The driver stopped about to yell and howl about the bump in his car but instead turned pale and called for an ambulance instead, which took both to their well know town’s hospital.

Fink woke up in a white room with plenty of needles stuck in his arm; including liquid and blood; and the mother of headaches but a warm feeling close to his side: 'W-what.. where..?’ he slowly opened his heavy eyelids before noticing the blonde head beside him in bed sleeping. A little smile formed on his face as he stroked the small back trying to get him to relax his hands and arms, but the only thing he got was a little groan: 'I am so sorry little bean… I-I am a bad big brother.’ the demon sobbed a little; trying not to start crying but his whole body was in pain still so he couldn’t help it but just let it flow down his face: “…I’s shouldn’t have said that… you’s Fink not Lucius… my big brother can’t be like him he is MY brother” the tiny voice suddenly returned with a cute little smile sweeter than all the candies in the world.

[wilhelmsbee]

Season 3 babey!!!!

(Redraw of my season 2 announcement drawing you can find on my ig @/lemonbee.art)

[devilsjacket]

opinions/ headcannons on the idea of wilhelm with another boy that’s also really in the spotlight and like has famous parents or somethin? idk, you don’t have to do this, have a lovely day <3 🫶🏻

I love this idea anon! Thank you for taking the time to request and I hope you like it!

Wilhelm x famous!reader headcanons

warning(s): n/a

You were quite popular at Hillerska, your family was well known for their riches and snobbery however people were surprised that you weren’t the same

You were kind and respectful, not making fun of anyone lesser than you

Wille took a liking to you more so than August, someone you spoke regularly to, or well it was more like he bothered you as opposed to you willingly talking to him.

You were always interested in Wilhelm, you had seen him on tv and thought he was pretty alright

Wille was the one who had initiated your conversation whilst you two had breakfast

“Hi, I uh, I’m Wille” Wilhelm awkwardly smiled as he watched you play with your food, not looking interested in it. You looked at him brush some hair from his face and smiled “ah, I know, I’m Y/n”

The conversation went pretty smoothly and you both ended up talking about things you liked, Wille found out you liked to playing games, something he hasn’t done before

“You’ve not played video games?! Not even one?!” You stared at him as if he had just said something outrageous; blasphemous even. Wille just shrugged and shook his head.

That’s how you two ended up in your dorm playing call of duty for the last hour, accidentally missing rowing practice and earning a harsh scold from August

You and Wille only grew closer, sneaking off school grounds to wander around Bjärstad, an area you both never saw much of.

Girls came up to you two and you politely took a few pictures with them, they tried to get Wilhelm to do so as well but you said he wasn’t in the mood after noticing his nervousness. He thanked you for that.

When you two got back to Hillerska, sneaking in through the open window to your dorm that’s when you both could feel a tightness in your chests. It was weird but- a good weird you know? You had offered Wille to stay and hang out for longer which he accepted a little too quickly.

“Cool- uh the bed is a bit small but we could both fit if we-” you tilted your head whilst looking at your bed “if we squeeze together I guess” you shrugged kicking off your shoes and not seeing the redness of Wille’s face due to the dark.

It was a nice sleep you two had, both cuddling, warm skin touching and sending shocks through both of you. Wille had rested his head on your chest mumbling something incoherent before falling into a peaceful sleep.

When it was morning Wille was already awake, fingertips tracing the faint abs on your stomach that became more apparent when you exhaled, he got all embarrassed when he saw you smiling, eyes slowly opening and meeting the morning sun that peeked through the curtains.

“Morning” you whispered cringing as your breath met with your nose, you hated morning breath. Wilhelm smiled and propped himself up on his elbow “good morning”

You moved your head groaning lightly, yeah Wille’s morning breath was worse “god your breath stinks!” You half laughed as your nose wrinkled. Wille only hummed and as soon as your head turned back, blew into your face, his disgusting breath burning your nostrils.

You gaged and wrestled with him until you landed between his legs, hand over his mouth to prevent his breath from attacking you again.

Upon realising your position you both turned red and you slowly moved your hand, despite his horrible breath you felt like kissing Wilhelm, nose brushing against his when you leaned closer.

But before you could there was a knock at your door, it was Alexander letting you both know what the time was, you looked over your shoulder and yelled a thanks hearing his footsteps fade into the distance afterwards.

You rolled off Wille and watched him lean over to you for a kiss but you dodged making him confused “brush your teeth first then kiss me” you said smiling, he nodded and rushed to his own dorm as if he was in a mission.

You in the meantime got ready and brushed your own teeth, making sure it was minty fresh for when Wille came back.

You and Wille had sorted out your relationship after a long afternoon of making out and softly touching each others flushed skin. You decided upon taking things slow, keeping it under wraps until Wille was ready to go public

Now in a relationship you needed to shake off the girls that wouldn’t stop asking you out, they knew what their answer would be but they still tried and tired.

There were lots of perks to yours and Wille’s relationship, one being that due to your popularity you could understand where he was coming from with his anxiety and stuff.

You knew how to calm him down and comfort him in the way he wanted, physical touch was an important thing to Wilhelm so you knew holding him would help a lot

And if you ever got anxious due to all the popularity Wille would be more than happy to push those people away and hold your hand to keep you grounded, even in public.

A/n: Should I make a part two since there’s a lot more I can write on this!

[raincitygirl76]

This. Plus, “crippling anxiety” didn’t become his entire personality, which is often a problem when scriptwriters try to write characters with mental health issues. Yes, Wilhelm’s as yet undiagnosed (but perfectly obvious to the viewers) anxiety disorder can be debilitating for him. But he has other important personality traits as well.

Also, he’s anxious and generally speaking pretty introverted, but I don’t think he’s shy, as such. When he wants something or someone, he expresses it. And he can be pretty authoritative when necessary (ex: 1.05 with the Society boys, 2.01 with August).

Wilhelm also hates making polite chit chat with strangers and near strangers while under scrutiny, hence his disinclination to attend the Parents Day lunch in 1.03. But just because he dislikes it and it triggers his anxiety doesn’t mean he’s bad at it. Or shy. Anxiety disorders often correlate with shyness but not always.

Wilhelm is a bundle of anxiety about public speaking, but he’s actually quite good at it when he can summon the emotional strength to speak in front of a crowd. He’s a complicated character, and has more nuance than most TV characters with mental illness.

Compare and contrast with “The Good Doctor”, which features a protagonist who’s autistic, and as far as I could tell from the 4 episodes I watched before I gave up, autism was this guy’s entire personality. I know autistic people in real life, and they are much more complex than that. I only tuned into Season 1 because one of the supporting actors was Antonia Thomas, who played Alisha in Misfits. I gave up after 4 episodes. The main character whose name I’ve already forgotten had clearly been written as “this man is autistic, and we the writers will never stop hammering the viewers over the head with that.”

I know an anxiety disorder is a mental illness while neurodivergence isn’t. But “The Good Doctor” was the first example that sprang to mind of a character being written as a diagnosis rather than a multifaceted person.

Maybe that show improved after I stopped watching. But having already wasted 4 hours of my life on it, I’ll have to take your word for it.

giving prince wilhelm crippling anxiety was the best possible decision that could've been made thank you so much everyone

[billfarrah]

So I finished my first Young Royals rewatch in a long time and I have thoughts - Part 1: Wilhelm

So I did not realize initially how much I would run my mouth so I’m actually going to separate my thoughts about the characters into different posts starting with Wilhelm. If this post does well, I’ll do it about the other characters too, because tbh I have a lot to say about everyone:

- First of all I cannot emphasize enough how much watching the whole series from start to finish just hits different. After so many months of just looking at gifs and photos, I am always blown away when I eventually rewatch the show as a whole by good it is. It’s the show’s vibes and atmosphere, cinematography, music, and fantastic pacing that make the show so compelling and that just doesn’t translate when you don’t watch the whole thing. I’m always worried I won’t like the show as much on my next rewatch and I’m always floored by just how much I love it every time.

- This point isn’t directly related to Wilhelm but I wanted to address it as I just noticed it this time. I’ve always suspected that the drugs the society are on in episode 4 are painkillers, but I’ve seen most people believing they were taking the ADHD meds. On rewatch, it’s very clear they’re using painkillers. In episode 2, I just noticed Simon steals Tramadol from Micke - which is a fast-release opiate painkiller. That can get you high as fuck. Many people take them recreationally as a way to get high and they’re a common source of addiction. Micke has a bad back we presume as Simon asks him how his back is in episode 1, but obviously Simon thinks Micke takes them recreationally. In the society party scene, the boys are taking the pills from the prescription bottles, which are likely also painkillers. So no, they weren’t using ADHD meds to get high; they were using opiates. Are these drugs illegal? No, but taking them for recreational purposes would definitely get you in a lot of shit if you were caught with them at a boarding school, or any school for that matter. As far as Simon only feeling responsible to pay Micke back for the booze and not the pills, I am not Swedish so I don’t know how it works, but from what I researched, one does not need to pay more than 2,300 krona per year for prescriptions, and most of Micke’s drugs were probably free as they are all prescription. Please correct me if I’m wrong.

- Anyway, I fucking love Wilhelm as a protagonist. I love how raw, gritty and unapologetic he can be. I could talk about his character for hours. He’s so nuanced and he rarely says what he is thinking or feeling, so I can understand why some viewers perhaps had a hard time connecting with him, but if you pay attention to his actions, everything he does makes sense without him needing to say a single word. I love that his sexuality is actually one of the few things about himself that he’s genuinely comfortable with; yeah, he has a few minutes of gay panic and he does push Simon away because he worries having a relationship with him would be too complicated, but Wilhelm’s feelings and sexual attraction for a boy is never the main thing he is concerned about and he is actually extremely comfortable with expressing that side of himself. He is elated by Simon, euphoric; he is electric with Simon beneath his hands. He’s in love with a boy and he knows it; that’s not what scares him - it’s the implication of what being in love with a boy means in the context of the rest of his life where the problem lies. It’s so refreshing to see a queer protagonist be so unabashed and expressive in his sexuality.

- Wilhelm’s dilemma is very clear despite, like I said above, him rarely verbalizing his feelings. The first episode makes his position perfectly clear - it’s not that he has an issue being a prince, he just hates how little control he has over his life, how little say he has in decisions that impact him, and the fact that he’s constantly being punished and scrutinized for the tiniest slip-ups. Wilhelm is ultimately just a person who wants control over his own life; he does not resent his privilege at all but rather the restrictions that come with it. When he gets into a fight at a party that wasn’t even his fault, he has to make a public apology and is sent to boarding school without being consulted by his parents, because they feel it is what he needs to do to save the image of the family. When he gets to Hillerska, Erik tells him essentially to just do whatever August tells him to do, even though Wilhelm clearly does not like August. When Wilhelm starts making his own friend in Simon, August is constantly meddling and telling him he shouldn’t be spending time with someone like him, and admonishes him for going to the football game with Simon and even gives him punishment for it. Even though Wilhelm is away from the palace and his family, he still has August there trying to act like he knows better than him and telling him how he should act.

Now enter Simon. As viewers, we have discussed at length how Simon completely shakes up Wilhelm’s world and perspective already so I won’t rehash that. However, there was one scene that stood out to me in connection with the above paragraph, and it’s one where Wilhelm does something that probably would be considered “bad” or a “mistake”, and Simon does not punish him for it. I’ve seen some people say Simon went too easy on him for calling him high and drunk on the football field, and I disagree; I think Simon’s reaction was exactly what Wilhelm needed, As I said above, Wilhelm is constantly being criticized and torn apart with consequences for even the tiniest or most minute thing, so for Simon to smile softly at him, tell him it’s okay and that he still likes him probably moved fucking mountains for Wilhelm. He did something stupid and he’s not getting scolded for it? Simon actually has compassion for him AND still likes him? No wonder Wilhelm immediately put himself between Simon’s legs. Wilhelm is a kid and he deserves to be a little bit reckless without being judged or admonished for it, and no, I don’t think him calling Simon was wrong or traumatic for Simon. Wilhelm was in a fragile state and Simon was concerned for him; he was not triggered, but I’ll get to that if I end up making a Simon post.

- Wilhelm is not shy. He has his moments of anxiousness and he is a bit awkward around Simon at first because he has a crush on him, but Wilhelm is actually very good at talking to people; he just doesn’t want to a lot of the time. He’s an introvert and he doesn’t really have patience for bullshit. I find people portray him as some shy little baby, but he’s actually quite blunt and curt sometimes in a way that I find amusing. He just genuinely has no patience for the frivolities and fakeness around him and while he knows how to play the game very well, he would rather just keep to himself than do so. His behaviour during his arrival to Hillerska is actually quite rude; he rolls his eyes when the PR lady tells him and the Headmistress to switch places for a better photo, utterly annoyed by the manufactured nature of it all. This isn’t me trying to say Wilhelm is a rude person; he isn’t and is actually very kind, but he isn’t always shy over expressing his displeasure; he just doesn’t do it all the time.

- People are too harsh on Wilhelm for most things, but one that stands out for me is his and Simon’s fight in the music room. Wilhelm came at the argument from a bad angle, yes, but he tries to make it right; unfortunately he struck a nerve with Simon and Simon walked away. He never once says he thinks Simon should take the fall; he just wants to have a dialogue with Simon over what their options are, but Simon was already angry and didn’t want to talk. He really did try to communicate with him.

- By the time of Lucia, Wilhelm is deflated. He is exhausted. He was terrified of losing Simon so he did what any privileged person would do, the only thing he knew how to do (and perhaps what was the only thing he could’ve done) - blame someone else. Simon still isn’t happy with him. Wilhelm doesn’t know what to do anymore. He feels like everything he does is wrong, he is wrong, he’s not cut out for anything. He doubts every decision he makes. All he wants is control over his own life but even when he takes matters into his own hands, it blows up in his face. This is why he was so easily manipulated into denying the video; he’s been through so much in such a short period of time and is questioning every decision he’s making. He doesn’t know what’s right or wrong anymore. Maybe his mother is right.

- I love that the writers weren’t afraid to make Wilhelm messy. To me there is nothing interesting about a protagonist that does the right thing every time because there is no room for them to grow. Wilhelm is such a fantastic protagonist because he has so much growing up to do. He makes mistakes and he’s a bit self-centered and caught up in his own world and he hurts Simon because of that, but he’s also motivated by incredibly pure feelings of love, passion, desire for his own autonomy and acceptance, control over himself and the things in his life. He is kind at heart but occasionally callous, he is anxious but also incredibly strong and powerful when he needs to be, he’s a giddy teenage boy in love but leaves Simon breathless with his confident mouth and hands. He is not just one thing all the time and that’s why he’s so exciting to me.

- During the scene where Wilhelm exposes August in front of the society, Edvin’s acting is particularly brilliant; we see that he has a powerful, assertive side to his personality, and is capable of being a leader, but you can also see in his body language and expression that he is a little bit anxious about it. His arms are crossed and his jaw twitches a bit; he’s working through his anxiety to do what he thinks is right, and we see him do this so many times throughout the series 0 most notably when he works through his anxiousness to connect with Simon, a boy he’s so desperately drawn to. He is not a shy uwu baby and he is not always crippled by his anxiety; it’s just a part of him.

This got away from me completely as I just have so many thoughts about this show. Please let me know if you’d like to me see talk about the other characters.

[ayellowcurtain]

Simon knows there’s an easier way. He’s seen it, knows how it feels, how his routine would be, how and by who he could be loved. And he hates every second of it.

The more he tries, the more he hates it.And at this point it’s even worse than the difficult way, that’s how much he made himself hate it. All of that because Wilhelm is not in it.

The easier way requires Simon to run as fast as he can and as further away from Wilhelm as possible, from his family, and anything to do with him.

But he’s so handsome, so funny, tall, and challenging, smart, kind, soft, the most loving, and the best kisser ever. Nobody will ever feel as good as Wille. It doesn’t matter if an hour goes by, or weeks, Simon desperately misses him the same.

When he’s tired of fighting, when he thinks about what he wants and what he thinks it’s the best, he’s already in Wille’s arms feeling his soft, gentle and desperate lips against his. They always start slow, like they still need to ask for each other’s permission, and they deepen the kiss until it feels like every inch of his skin is catching on fire, but it feels nice, comforting, and so sexy it makes him dizzy.

In every way, Wilhelm is the reason why his life is the biggest chaos, but he’s also the one keeping Simon in one piece, or at least the thought of him, of their kisses and sleepless nights. And maybe that feeling it’s the best feeling Simon ever experienced. It feels like he’s floating. Constantly hanging high in the air but with the certainty that he’ll never fall. That’s how Wilhelm makes him feel and Simon is addicted to it.

Maybe he really isn’t a good guy because once Wille is in the picture, nobody else matters. Simon can only think and desire to be with him, it doesn't matter when, where or why.

Simon would put the whole monarchy, the whole school, the whole country on fire if that was the choice he had to make to constantly feel the way he feels when Wilhelm is holding him, their lips desperate for even more kisses.

He wants to love and desire Wilhelm and be loved and desired by him, in every second of his life. He wants Wilhelm to have an imprint of him in every moment in his life. Selfishly, he wants every thought that Wilhelm has to lead back to him, to what they feel and what they have.

-

Maybe this is Simon’s mindset after their kiss at the party during season 2, or that is after their first time while Wilhelm is out eating breakfast, or late at night when he’s alone and frustrated after that awkward date at Marcus’ place, who knows…