#it's a passionate and beautiful message against hatred

[edisacornball]

Every time I see yet another post blaming that it's because of these people that we have Trump as president, no, it's because of these people, those people, that people, and all of them need to immediately get out of my life and never talk to me again...

And all I can think of is my favorite quote from Ed in Conqueror of Shamballa:

"Brother, is all of this... my fault? Why is it all turning out this way? I just... I wanted...." "I know, Al. You were just trying to bring me back home again. For whatever reason, Wrath wanted to help, that sacrifice was his choice. The other Al wanted to get me home too and feel like he did something meaningful. And Noah wanted a place to belong. We all had our excuses, and they seemed right to us. And no one thought it would lead to suffering like this. I know that. None of us were looking to start a war. But still, a war is what we got, so all of us take the blame. Do you understand? That's why we have to make it right and defend this world as long as we're alive. We can't keep living like our own dreams are all that matter, okay?"

It's all our fault. All of us. It's time we stop pointing fingers and start rolling up our sleeves.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Can we have bestfriend headcanons for rollo please???? i need to be friends with this guy so bad you don't understand

***Warning: Glorious Masquerade spoilers in the final few headcanons!***

Curiouser and Curiouser...

The best way to sum up this relationship is that Rollo is the mom friend, and you are his child. (If you were to ask Rollo, he would say you're an idiot, but you're his idiot.)

From an outsider's perspective, it's hard to tell that you're friends at all. He always has that hard-to-read face on him, plus those grimaces he gets whenever the slightest annoyance or inconvenience makes itself known.

You've gotten used to his quirks though, so you can read his emotions a lot better than most. When the corners of his mouth twitch, that's him trying to smile! When he taps a finger against his arm? He's thinking hard about something.

He dislikes it when you call him "bestie" (so, of course, you make sure to do it often). Rollo corrects you with his name each and every time.

He finds physical affection just as repulsive. Rollo's constantly shying away from your touch, insisting that it's unhygienic and immodest to even so much as brush shoulders by accident.

There was an incident when you hugged him once and he got oddly quiet, then asked "... What is this?" to which you had casually responded, "Affection."

"Disgusting," Rollo had declared, handkerchief to his nose. "... Do it again."

He's one of those old-fashioned people who insists on keeping in contact via letters and cards instead of text messages, email, and/or social media. Rollo claims that stuff "rots your brain cells" and "promotes a vain, degenerate lifestyle".

You thought it silly and inefficient at first, but over time you've come to appreciate the time and thought that comes with each letter. Receiving a note from Rollo is the best part of your day--you love catching up with him and sending him back updates of your very own.

He's a busy guy and follows a strict schedule, so more often than not you're the one that's following him around as he does his various tasks. You lend him a hand too, though Rollo takes care to not burden you too much. These are his responsibilities, so he should take charge of them.

You occasionally climb up the bell tower with him (the view up there is amazing!) and all the gargoyles clamor to greet you. Rollo has to remind them not to overwhelm the guest.

When there is time, you sit down at a cafe and share a meal. Rollo introduces you to his favorite places and makes recommendations (though he usually gets the exact same thing). You try to push him to vary up his diet a bit more, tearing off pieces of your own lunch or offering him bites of whatever it is you're having (even though he insists he'll have none of that).

One day, you caught Rollo parading through the streets on horseback. He introduced his steed to you, instructing you on how to safely pat it and feed it an apple from your hand. The horse seemed to like you, so Rollo hoisted you up and let you ride it around the city for the rest of the day.

He's still not very good at expressing himself. When you sense that he's feeling down in the dumps, it takes quite a bit of coaxing to get him to talk about it with you (if at all). In his mind, he shouldn't be troubling others with his own matters.

Sometimes you're not successful at convincing him to open up, so you settle for giving a gentle reminder that you'll be there for him no matter what. You wouldn't want to push him to talk when he's not ready to!

... On the other hand, when Rollo wants to talk, he'll rant and rave for what seems like forever. You patiently nod your head and listen to everything he spews out, from his express hatred of a certain lizard to how the local goats almost ate his stationary set.

There are rare times, though, when Rollo shares his passions and ambitions with you. The relaxing gardening he has been doing as of late, how beautiful the Bell of Salvation is today, his plans for the future... It's in these moments that you can truly appreciate how solemn and thoughtful he can be.

Rollo often nags you for little things: there's a crease in your shirt, your room is slightly messy, there's a hair out of place, etc. But hey, it's fine. You know he does it lovingly, even if the comments come with a slight frown.

He also tends to lecture you about your own safety, often warning you to keep away from "suspicious individuals" (and, of course, mages). Rollo lets you know that if anyone gives you trouble, you should inform him right away and he'll come storming over to give them hell. Yes, he's the overprotective friend that will throw himself into the crossfires to defend your honor--

This man comes to hangouts with everything you could possibly need in case of an emergency. Got a scrape? Boom, first aid kit. (He even patches you up personally.) Hands dirty? Hand sanitizer and wet wipes for the rescue. You start calling him “dad” as a joke every time he produces exactly what you need.

Rollo has the tendency to (sternly) speak up for you, especially in cases when you're too meek to speak up for yourself. It has big "EXCUSE ME! They asked for no pickles" energy.

Once a year, you join Rollo for a very special trip. You always stop by the same florist's shop, always watch him select the same bouquet of white lilies, always walk quietly alongside him down to the local cemetery. You don't follow him to the grave, but you let him know he can take as long as he needs with the visit, that you'll wait for him at the gates.

You watch the clouds slowly pass by and the sky change colors from cornflower blue to the shades of sunset. Night has started to trickle in when you hear his approaching footsteps. The flower bouquet is gone, deposited as an offering to a boy that has become one with the stars.

Rollo emerges, and you pretend to not notice the wetness to his eyes, the silvery shine upon his cheeks. You know if you point it out, he'll only become defensive and deny it.

"Ready to go?" you ask every year.

"... Yes," he replies, just the same as always. (Rollo will then try to subtly wipe away at his tears.) "Thank you for accompanying me. I do apologize for imposing on your time."

"Don't," you tell him. "I've always got your back, just like you've always got mine. That's what friends are for, right?"

[catie-does-things]

People of our own time may consider the story of Catherine and Andrea more horrible than edifying, and feel that her ecstatic contemplation of the blood of Christ--a motive which recurs continually in her visions and her letters and her teaching--discloses an unhealthy love for the least attractive feature of Christianity. In our own lifetime we have learned to know the smell of rotting corpses on battlefields and in bombed towns; we know of the stinking sores and boils of prisoners from concentration camps, where dead and dying were made to lie on beds as wretched as the one Catherine had chosen for herself. We have poured out oceans of blood and tears, both of the guilty and the guiltless, while we hoped against hope that this blood and these tears could help to save a world reeling under the weight of its miseries. And how little have we achieved of the great things we dreamed! Yet we ascribe it to the confused ideas of the time she lived in and her own dark vision of Christianity, when Catherine intoxicated herself with the blood of Christ--the blood which would put an end to human bloodshed, if only we could agree to receive it as the redemption from our bloodthirsty passions, our insatiable lust for imagined gain for ourselves projected onto other nations or classes. Indeed, many Catholics think in this way. The strong-willed, brave and strangely optimistic girl who handled the powerful men of her time so masterfully, who had such an unusual understanding of the characters of the men and women among whom she lived, who really succeeded in making peace between many of her unruly townsmen, who in fact on one or two occasions prevented war, and on many put an end to bloody feuds--she would answer us as she answered her contemporaries in her letters and conversations and in the Dialogue: that the blood of Christ was the only source of her own courage and strength and wisdom, of her amazing and indomitable joy of living. She would say to us, Drink of it with the lips of your souls, as the saints in their visions seemed to drink it with their lips of flesh; assuage your thirst in the love which streams from God's holy Heart--then there will be an end to the vain shedding of man's blood by the hand of man. In her visions Catherine saw God's fire fall from heaven, like a rain of blazing light and burning warmth: can we really understand anything of her experience, we who have seen the fire of hate falling from the clouds, who fear in our hearts for the day when an even more destructive fire, invented by an even more bitter hatred and more violent passions, shall rain down over us and our children? For us, Catherine would have only the same message which she brought to her contemporaries, she would know only of the same remedy for our misery--the blood of Christ, the fire of God's love, which burns up self-love and self-will, and lets the soul appear, beautiful and full of grace, as it was meant to be when God created us.

Catherine of Siena, by Sigrid Undset (1951)

[dragoneyes618]

I always love speaking in different communities around the world. We are part of an incredible people. We have built neighborhoods, shuls and schools that speak of our resilience despite the galus we have suffered for thousands of years.

The greatest pulse of our nation is found when I have the privilege to speak to our children. What are they thinking? What do they have to say? They reflect the promise of tomorrow, and that which we are feeling today.

On a recent speaking tour I had the pleasure of speaking at a girl’s high school. The student body was a broad mix of backgrounds, a colorful tapestry of the beauty of Am Yisrael.

As I searched the faces in front of me, I asked a question. I told the girls that there was no right or wrong, just the emes, the truth that lies within.

“How many of you feel proud or prouder to be a Jew since October 7?”

The room was silent. I peered at the audience. Slowly, a few hands went up. Meekly. Like half a hand, barely seen by the other students sitting in the audience.

I had to catch my breath. This was not what I expected. I felt a sadness within that is difficult to describe. And I am raising my voice to you as I fear for the future of our people.

Think about it. These girls will soon be facing the world. Perhaps they will be going off to college campuses, work places, or daily interactions with peers. They will be facing venomous hatred and hear lies about Israel. What will their response be? How will they feel about their Judaism, their nation, their land? What will their connection be to their brothers and sisters who are sacrificing their lives and limbs so that we may hold onto our sacred Eretz Yisrael? The Kotel stands tall despite our years of suffering while our children bow in shame?

My friends, we have much work to do.

Ten years ago I sounded the alarm about antisemitism on college campuses. I spoke to whomever would listen. The couples that I teach gathered their college-aged kids for an eye opening evening to hear about what is happening in colleges across the USA. Not enough people took my message seriously.

And now I am sounding a new alarm. We are allowing others to define us, blood libel us and tell our story. We must give our children Jewish pride, identity and roots. Our children are living their Yiddishkeit, their Shabbos, yomim tovim, and their davening by rote. It’s the ‘same old same old’. The passion has gone missing. Not enough of our children are aware of their great legacy, the magic of our nation, and the beauty the heritage that has been bequeathed to us. Our connection to Hashem must feel alive. Our children need to feel the fire, the koach, the energy and love of being a ‘Yid’.

I shared with the girls how each morning at roll call in Bergen Belsen, my mother had only one thought. Despite her hunger, the sores and lice covering her body, she looked with disdain at the Nazis, yemach shemo, who stood before her. “Baruch Hashem!” she would say to herself each day. “Baruch Hashem that I am the daughter of prophets and kings, my Tatty and Mommy, the daughter of my people. Baruch Hashem that I am not one of you!”

To give passion and pride to our children we must begin with ourselves. We cannot afford to sleep through one of the greatest challenges Am Yisrael has ever faced. It is not simply about the slaughter and massacre of October 7. It is not about the continued rockets, drones, missiles and battles we are facing daily as a nation. It is not about the entire world standing against us and marching for those who want to murder and snuff the life out of us. It is not about the evil and venomous antisemitism that is choking the atmosphere on college campuses and universities across the world.

It is about the heart and soul of our kinderlach. The future of our people is resting upon our shoulders. We have the responsibility to ignite the pintelah Yid that lies within our children. We must restore the feeling of “Mi Kiamcha Yisrael!…Banim Atem laMakom! – Who is like Your nation, Israel!…You are the children of Hashem in this world!”

Ask yourself – how can I bring this feeling of Jewish pride and love to the children in my life? The future of Am Yisrael is counting on you.

[the-coffee-fandom]

❀。• *₊°。 ❀° 。。° ❀ 。° ₊ * •。❀

𝙷𝚊𝚗𝚊𝚑𝚊𝚔𝚒 𝙷𝚘𝚞𝚛𝚜

❀。• *₊°。 ❀° 。。° ❀ 。° ₊ * •。❀

❀ Hanahaki Hours 2024 Flower Symbolism List ❀

Hanahaki Hours 2024 Calendar

Poppy

Red - Remembrance - Death - Hope - Love - Sacrifice - Success - Good fortune

White - Life without conflict - Peace - Faith - Eternal life of the soul - Pleasant dreams

Blue - Imagination - Thinking - Faith - Creativity - Messages from angels

Pink - Compassion - Platonic love - Restful sleep

Yellow - Renewal - Optimism - Positive memories

Orange - Joy - Exuberance - Health - Regeneration

Purple - Remembrance for animals during wartime - Commitment to peace - Luxury - Peacefulness - Imagination - Beauty - Tribute and honouring another

Black - Elegance - Deep sleep - Mysterious dreams

Daisy

White - Purity - Innocnence

Yellow - Joy - Friendship - Cheerfulness - Well wishes

Pink - Platonic love - Romance - Gentleness

Orange - Healing - Happiness - Playfulness - Warmth - Joy - Excitement

Red - Love - Passion - Romance - Unbreakable love and devotion (bundle)

Purple - Thinking of someone - Spontaneity - Peace - Unity - Fun - Apology - Misunderstanding - Royalty - Pride

Blue - Trust - Honesty - Loyal

Forget Me Not

Blue - Remembrance - Memory - Deep emotional connections - Pledge to never forget them and think of them often (wedding) - Eternal love - Think of them often

White - Charity - Care for less fortunate

Pink - Romantic relationships between spouse - True love - Respect - Promise to never forget someone - Constancy

Sage

- Health and well-being - Passion and romance - Domestic Virtue - Immortality - Royalty - Success - Diginity - Love - Resilience

Green - Balance - Tranquility - Growth - Harmony - Calmness - Relacation - Renewal

Purple - Royalty - Success - Dignity - Wisdom - Spirituality - Life - Prosperity - Love - Resilience - Protection - Hope

Yellow - Healing - Protection - Purification

Wolf's Bane

- Danger - Evil - Death - Warning - Presence of a foe - Protection (against mythic beings) - Transformation - Deceit - Murder - Dark magic Associated with werewolves, vampires, and witches in folklore. Should never be given as sympathy or grief due to its connotation of death. Used historically to make weapons more deadly due to how poisonous it is.

Yellow - Warmth - Creativity - Deception - Caution - Malicious - Hidden dangerous outcomes - Friendship - Appreciation Can be used as a special warning. When all things look beautiful and well, that is not the case, and caution should be practiced for the dangers that hide beneath

Blue - Healing - Depression - Anxiety - Sorrow - Trust - Wishes of fast recovery - Sympathy

Purple - Mysteriously wicked - Mystery - Murder - Poison - Witchcraft - Mistrust - Hatred Use this in a bouquet for your enemies

White - Elegance - Innocence - Honesty - Thoughtful love - Purity

Avens

White - Innocence - Purity - Clarity - Peace - Trust - Serenity

Red - Respect - Desire - Courage - Joy - Vitality - Deep afffection - Support - Encouragement

Purple - Passion - Opulence

Yellow - Spreading happiness - Joy - Friendhip - Protection

Peony

- Good luck - Wealth - Fortune - Compassion - Romance - Accomplisment It was said that digging them up would result in curses and it was bad luck if they dried out.

Yellow - Happiness - Warmth - Friendship - New beginnings - Prosperity

White - Bashfulness - Apology

Pink - Luck - Prosperity

Red - Love - Passion - Honour - Respect

Coral (Changes colour as they bloom) - Elegance - Good fortune - Strong relationship - Success - Happiness - Abundance

Purple - Royalty - Nobility - Diginity - Admiration - Respect - Romance - Ambition - Luxury

Orchid

- Love - Fertility - Charm

Pink - Femininity - Grace - Thoughtfulness - Love - Innocence

White - Purity - Innocence - Honour

Purple - Royalty - Luxurity - Admiration - Originality - Calmness - Enchantment

Yellow - Friendship - Joy - Appreciation - Positivity - Optimism

Red - Beauty - Romance - Love - Strong emotions - Intense affection - Desire - Courage - Determination

Blue - Confidence - Loyalty - Power - Calmness - Serenity - Unique - Mezmerizing

Orange - Creativity - Energy - Fascination

Green - Health - Good fortune - Sucess - Growth - Vitality - Recovery - New beginnings

Narcissus (Daffodil)

Yellow - Mirth - Camaraderie - Abundance - Positivity - Happy chance - Good luck

Blue - Mystery - Transformation - Inspiration Do not occur naturally

Orange - Well-being - Courage - Creativity - Nurturing love

Pink - Femininty - Tenderness - Grace - Gratitude - Affectionate love - Passion (deeper pink) - Energy (deeper pink) - Strength (deeper pink)

[meraki-yao]

Hi this is the recent anon you posted who responded to your opinion on the reactions to the misgendering of Casey. I’m relieved that my asks was interpreted the right way and thanks for responding so quickly and respectfully! I really appreciate it. I hope I didn’t come off as defensive or preach-y, I just wanted to share my opinion. I really like your blog because it feels like a safe place to bring up something like that and start open conversations which is always a good thing. But I agree that the hatred for Taylor about the misgendering when he didn’t even do the misgendering (and any other hatred outside of that) is absolutely unnecessary and awful. It’s so constant I’m glad that Taylor isn’t ‘on’ twitter. Every video we see of him makes me smile because he’s so sweet and sunshine-like. He comes across as very smart and we can see that he cares genuinely about the impact and importance of representation in media. He takes it very seriously which I appreciate and admire about him. He also is passionate about a lot of things like sustainability as well. He truly is beautiful inside and out. He’s a good person, so genuinely good that it bothers me that so many people see that and want to tear him down and chip away at all of that. And for what, right? Why are these people hating on a man that they don’t know online and will probably never know. We can all come to the same conclusions why these people are doing this but no matter why, it’s uncalled for and they should stop. We need to ignore them and block them and keep it moving as we are and continue spreading positivity and support. It’s feels so much better to uplift people than to tear them down. You and other similar blogs uplift people by reading fanfic, reblogging art, and having positive and funny conversations so keep being you and thank you again for responding in an understanding way to my other ask ❤️

Hi! Thank YOU for sharing your opinions respectfully and educating me. I really appreciate it. Actually, I wish conversations were more like this instead of the constant arguing and yelling. This is what a discussion and exchange of opinion should be like.

I'm also glad I didn't misinterpret your message and that my blog an be a safe space. I try to be as respectful and open to thoughts as possible, and the only thing I will truly berate and turn against is anything asked or done with the potential to stir up drama, or pure hate.

Taylor just seems like a wonderful, kind, genuine guy, and it's really painful to see haters attack him like that. I wish they would stop, but again, that's not something in our control. In the meantime I'll continue to share love and appreciate for Taylor, Nick and RWRB (and everyone involved) here :D ❣️

[kanisema-blog]

The rhythmic clacking of my keyboard filled the sterile silence of the library. Deadlines loomed, research papers mocked me with their blinking cursors, and my brain felt like mush. A frustrated groan escaped my lips, sending a ripple of startled silence through the once-peaceful room.

Suddenly, a message popped up on my screen. It was from an anonymous user on the research forum I frequented. "Everything alright over there?" it read.

Startled, I typed back, "Just the usual student meltdown. Deadlines, writer's block, the whole shebang."

A moment later, another message arrived. "Sounds like you need a virtual shoulder pat and maybe some...dessert?"

I couldn't help but smile. "Dessert? Are you offering to bribe me with virtual cookies?"

"Even better," the message read. "Have you heard of Chowking Halo Halo? It's this amazing Filipino shaved ice dessert with everything from beans to ube jam. Trust me, it'll put a smile back on your face."

Intrigued, I Googled the dessert, the vibrant colors and overflowing toppings a feast for the eyes. "Oh my god," I typed, "that looks incredible. But seriously, who are you?"

The response was a playful, "Just your friendly neighborhood dessert dealer."

Over the next few weeks, this anonymous stranger became my virtual lifeline. We commiserated over research woes, celebrated small victories, and exchanged ridiculous memes. He, with his endless knowledge of obscure historical trivia and his unwavering optimism, and me, with my sarcastic wit and caffeine-fueled rants.

One evening, amidst a particularly frustrating bout of writer's block, I sent a message, half-joking, half-desperate. "Oh my god," I typed, "it seems like I've killed someone at your level of anger. Can I send you a virtual Chowking Halo Halo so you can chill???"

His response was a single sentence: "Challenge accepted. But only if you agree to a video call so I can see the face behind the sass."

My heart hammered against my ribs. A video call? This was supposed to be anonymous! But the thought of finally seeing the person who'd become my confidante, the one who'd brought laughter back into my stressful world, was too tempting to resist.

Taking a deep breath, I typed, "Alright, you win. But you better be prepared to be amazed by my bedhead and procrastination pile."

The video call was a whirlwind of nervous laughter and stolen glances. He wasn't what I expected, not the stereotypical image of a research forum dweller. He had kind eyes, a mess of curly hair, and a smile that could melt glaciers.

Our conversations, once confined to text messages, flowed effortlessly in real-time. We learned about each other's dreams, fears, and the most embarrassing childhood stories. We discovered a shared love for bad reality TV and a passionate hatred of early morning classes.

Months turned into years, our online connection blossoming into a beautiful offline reality. We met for coffee dates that turned into starlit walks and movie nights that stretched well into the morning. The research forum remained our secret haven, a place where it all began, a constant reminder of the virtual dessert that led me to the real sweetness of love.

Today, years later, we stand in the kitchen, laughing as we attempt to recreate our first taste of Chowking Halo Halo. It isn't perfect, but the mess of colorful ingredients and the taste of accomplishment are a delicious reminder of our journey.

He looks at me, his eyes warm, and says, "Remember when you thought you'd killed me with your stress levels?"

I grin, leaning into him. "And you saved me with a virtual bowl of shaved ice? Best. Bribe. Ever."

[damoreads]

Federico Garcia Lorca's Last Interview: A Message of Unity and Beauty

Federico Garcia Lorca is widely regarded as one of Spain's most celebrated poets and playwrights, renowned for his evocative and lyrical writing style that has captivated audiences around the world. Unfortunately, his life was tragically cut short in August 1936 when he was executed by Nationalist forces during the Spanish Civil War.

Two months before his untimely death, Lorca sat down for an interview with Lluís Bagaría i Bou, a well-known cartoon artist. The interview was published in the Madrid newspaper El Sol, and it reads like a surreal conversation between two established artists.

Throughout the interview, Lorca espouses his belief in the power of art to transcend political and social divisions. He saw art as a means of expressing universal truths that could speak to people from all walks of life, regardless of their political affiliations or social status. For Lorca, art had the ability to unite people and bring them together in a shared experience of beauty and truth.

The full interview was republished in 2020 by the Revista Rambla, but there is one particular passage that stands out. Lorca was asked if he believed that borders and national identity were destined to disappear. His response was both thoughtful and passionate:

I am 100% Spaniard, and it would be impossible for me to live outside my geographical limits; but I hate people who are Spaniards just for being born in Spain and nothing else. I am everyone's brother and I detest the man who sacrifices himself for an abstract nationalist idea just because he loves his homeland with a blindfold over his eyes. A good person from China is closer to me than a bad Spaniard. I sing of Spain and I feel it to the core, but before that, I am a man of the world and a brother to all. Of course, I do not believe in political frontiers.

These words are a testament to Lorca's belief in the universality of art and his rejection of narrow-minded nationalism. They serve as a reminder that, even in the darkest of times, there are voices like Lorca's that continue to speak out against hatred and division.

[bakugohoex]

“know your place...foolish girl”

pairing: ryomen sukuna x female reader

cw: tattoo artist sukuna, fluff, mentions of death, enemies to lovers, long fic, fluff, angst, language, slut shaming, nsfw (praise, jaw grabbing, nipple sucking, female receiving oral, unprotected sex, breeding, pet names, sir kink, finger sucking) 

word count: 14,400+

a/n: please don’t ask how i wrote this, it took like four days and I just had this urge to keep adding the points I wanted to add. posting this on ao3 later on tonight as well, so here’s the link to that. 

summary: in which one terrible meeting with sukuna leads you to be pushed into an unusual relationship with one another, with you both starting out hating one another, could you both really be friends?

↞ back to jujutsu kaisen masterlist

Birds circled around the area; the gloomy storms ready to cascade down onto the pavement. The need for a coffee fix was evident as you walked towards your favourite café, shouting through the phone at your friend, Yui who needed you once again. You didn’t care for her next want, instead barging through the doors of the place, a warm breath of air hitting you as you smelt the crushed coffee and appetising deserts lined up in front of you. Waiting in line as you continued to hear her ramble, “I’ll think about it.”

“I’ll take that as a yes, I’ll send you the address.” You rolled your eyes as you hanged up to order your coffee, she was never close to you. But when she needed something she’d always end up calling you. This time for company to get her first tattoo, she was a sweet girl, but could be a pain when in need.

Quickly ordering you waited to get your coffee, scrolling through the text message as she sent the time for later on tonight and the address in the inner parts of the city. It was an area you hadn’t been too, google maps wasn’t helping to get a true sense of the place. You tried zooming in as you shuffled backwards for others to wait for their coffee, instead meeting someone’s back. Apologising you stood still trying to zoom in as you moved away from the guy, he glared at you, watching how you squinted into your phone.

“Watch where you’re going?” He scowls as he barges past you, hitting your elbow as you finally lock eyes with the man.

His blushed pink hair would almost make him seem sweet, but the tattoos that adorned his arms and went right up to his neck gave an intimidating essence. His eyes flashed with a sadistic glee as he raised an eyebrow at you. “Sorry.” You mutter as you grab your coffee, seeing the fury of wind bashing against the trees as it looked like a scene out there.

He didn’t say anymore leaving to go into the weather, you didn’t question the mysterious man as you went back to your own coffee and phone. The outside of the tattoo place looked decent, somewhere where the ditsy girl you called your friend would definitely never go. But what could you do, you texted saying you’d meet her as you went out into the wind, a cold breath almost pushing you back inside as you took steady steps. Walking past the coffee shop, you saw the same guy from prior, tugging at his pink hair as drank his coffee. He looked pissed at whoever he was talking too, you didn’t pay any attention to him as you walked past him.

The wind had other plans, as he felt himself being dragged by the wind pushing right into you, coffee spilling on your clothes as this time you were the one to scowl at him. “What the fuck?”

“You talking to me.” His eyes flicked to your now brown stained shirt as the wind had seemed to calm down at the second you both touched.

You gave a glare as you didn’t know how to react to something like that, “you could apologise.” It was a mutter, but he heard you well enough to give you a look of disgust.

“Know your place.” He moved closer, almost towering on top of you as he came right up into your face in an unamused manner, “foolish girl.”

Your eyes widened as you had been keeping in a harsh breath, he left you standing there in silence, coffee staining into your skin and clothes as you finally let out a deep breath. You watched the pink haired boy leave without an apology as a fear ran down your spine at this man.

Shaking your head as you made the strenuous walk towards your apartment to find clothes that you could quickly wear before you met Yui. The multiple texts you’d gotten as you put your clothes to wash, different tattoo ideas she wanted, you ignored it as you put on semi decent clothes. The flash of the time being shown on your bedside table as you ran out of your apartment right to where you both had decided to meet.

The wind had calmed down a lot more as the brisk hues of yellows and reds began setting downwards, seeing her waiting on the road where the tattoo place was. She gave you a gleam as she grabbed your hand, almost dragging you into the place. Open brick cascaded down the walls as designs scattered against it, every design was intricate, beautiful even. You both began looking at the designs as you saw someone come down from the upstairs area, the stairs open as a man with black hair arrived.

“Hello ladies, how can I help you?” His hair reached to right down his back, partially up as stray strands adorned his face. Tattoos scoured his exposed arms as you saw a significant one run down his neck to meet another one of his tattoos.

He was attractive, a sense of mystery behind those black eyes of his. Yui spoke of her appointment as you continued looking around, scrolling through a collection of tattoos on the desk. You found some designs that you liked; you had never thought of getting a tattoo but seeing all the intricate designs that brought so much passion made your heart almost burst. “Those are Sukuna’s designs.”

A white-haired man came strolling past the desk, crystal blue eyes that brought so much depth as you traced the designs with your fingers. “They’re nice.”

“You getting any?” The man asked as Yui had started filling out some forms by your side.

You shake your head going back to look at the details of each one, “Sukuna should be down any minute.” The black-haired man spoke as both him and the white-haired man left to see some other clients that had come through the doors.

Yui looked more giddy than usual, those wide eyes as she eagerly paced beside you. “Ryo.” She whines as she sees someone she recognised; you didn’t turn to meet the man as you continued staring at Sukuna’s work.

“I told you not to call me that.” The man scowls behind you, the voice felt so familiar as if you had heard it before. You start to turn around to meet the man  when you feel him almost shout to you, “this the friend then?”

“Yeah, she loves your work.” You meet the man’s gaze as both of you stare at one another, with wide eyes and unsettling confusion.

You hadn’t realised but the white-haired man had come back and had been witnessing the two of you stare at one another. “Sukuna, that isn’t your ex-fuck is it….awkward.”

“Fuck off Satoru.” His eyes scanned back at you as Yui looked between the two of you in confusion, “what? Come here to make me pay for your washing.”

“What is wrong with you? I didn’t even say anything.” You retort back eyes lazily gazing his own, you could see his tattoos more clearly, the two lines on both his wrists and upper arms, the circles on his shoulders as you could just see the start of it.

“You’re here for some reason, I should be the one making you pay for my spilt coffee.” He grumbles back moving away from your friend and closer to your own body.

You watched him move his fingers to your jaw, hatred boiling up in your skin at his touch, “you’re blaming me for the winds action, what are you 5?”

“God…both of you are giving me a migraine.” A blonde arrived carrying what looked like sliced bread  as he looked at Sukuna and you. He had been watching the performance, seeing how both of you had become frustrated in a matter of seconds.

“Whatever, come on, let’s get your tattoo over and done with.” He muttered to Yui who was still confused.

You grabbed her arm making her stop as she stared right back at you, being an airhead really must be tough for her. “Who is that guy?”

“My boyfriend, I told you about him, remember?” You blinked a couple times in confusion as you repeated the word in your head. She had spoken about a boyfriend, but you assumed she meant someone cute like her and not a man covered in tattoos with a sadistic stupid grin.

You nodded letting her go as you leaned against the counter looking at Satoru and the blond, “is he always an ass or is it a special occasion.”

“He’s an ass to us, don't worry about him.” Satoru’s words were reassuring as the blond started wanting to know your relationship with his co-worker.

You nod as you wait in the reception, there had really been no reason for you to even go with your friend. She had left to get her stupid tattoo with her stupid boyfriend and now here you were on your own trying to act like you had stuff going in your life. The two having begun to talk between one another before you saw the black-haired man come back with his client. “Is Sukuna still in there?”

“Yeah knowing him he’s getting something other than money in return.” Satoru scoffed as he went to grab some of the sliced bread that the blond had been holding. The black-haired man stared at you in confusion before asking what occurred as he had heard shouting before. “Sukuna got all bitchy again, they know each other.”

“Oh you two fucked?”

“Not that it’s any of your business but no we didn’t fuck, he spilt coffee on me this morning.” You retorted as you crossed your arms not meeting the gazes of the three men. 

Satoru looked at his two friends as he gave a smirk to them both, “I’m surprised he didn’t make you pay for the coffee.”

“Just the coffee, if she wasn’t attractive he’d make her pay for being in the same proximity as her.” The black-haired man spoke as you watched the three men chuckle, disregarding their comment on your attractiveness. You rolled your eyes as you heard him speak again, “I’m Geto, that’s Satoru and Nanami, what’s yours then?”

“Y/n.” You had sat down on one of the couches in the waiting area, after the introductions an influx of customers who came in for their own bookings. Satoru waved goodbye as Nanami and Geto seemed to be pushed with clients into the respective areas. 

All three had their own intricate tattoos and designs, Nanami with a whole sleeve across his arm that went write up to his neck. You had seen how the couple open buttons in his shirt allowed wisps of black to be shown. Geto and the scattered tattoos across his arms and Satoru with his own mix and matches tattoos of different colours and shapes. You flicked through the booklet again, eyes scoring against Sukuna’s work. For such an arrogant piece of shit his work really was divine.

You heard Yui come out with Sukuna, dishevelled hair as Sukuna wiped her lipstick from his mouth. He glared at you as you refused to meet his eyes, the urge to punch him in his stupid face being prevalent. “Y/n, look isn’t it so cute.”

She showed you her thigh where the rose was, Sukuna looking at it with a roll of his eyes. It was nothing like the intricate designs you had seen in the booklet. You may not have known the man, but it just didn’t look like something he’d enjoy doing. She pulled her skirt back down; you could almost smell sex on her as she went up to Sukuna. He had told her what to use before she gave him a long kiss. You tried to not watch them kiss but it was a whole show to watch, his hand gripping her ass as he kissed back, saliva dripping from their mouths. 

Looking anywhere but at them, you put the booklet back onto the main desk before hearing her say a goodbye to her Ryo. “I told you not to call me that,” there was no teasing manner in his words, he was dead serious, hating how his name sounded on the whores mouth.

“Ryo told me he spilled coffee on you this morning, I’ll make him apologise to you tomorrow.” You gave her a blank look as you both walked through the night sky.

“Tomorrow?” You questioned not knowing what was even occurring the next day.

She raised an eyebrow as she spoke, “Nobara, she invited all of us to her apartment, remember?” The memory of the dyed haired girl came alight, the three of you had been talking in a lecture when she told you both to come to her housewarming. She had been so excited to show you how she decorated the place and to show you everything she bought but you hadn’t been paying attention. Instead nodding at her words instead, “I invited Ryo to come with me.”

“Oh great, an afternoon seeing that dickhead's face.” You scowled, kicking the pebble into the pavement as you tried to not whine but you hated the man and you most certainly knew he hated you.

She brought her hands to her chest trying to gain warmth through the cold weather, “don’t be like that, he means a lot to me.”

“Yeah being told off for saying his name sure shows how much he cares for.” Maybe you were still pissed about what occurred this morning, he hadn’t even apologised for something so small. But your friend was too unaware to realise what you saw, a demon reincarnated.

You both parted ways as you walked the stretch to your apartment, you knew Yui was sweet, but her lack of awareness was sometimes frustrating. You had heard the moans come from the small area, heard how everybody seemed to find it normal and what could you do. Nothing, you stared blankly at the wall in your apartment, the bland cream walls encasing nothing but the sadness of uni life. Nobara was sweet enough to invite you and you knew you’d just have to ignore that bastard instead.

The next day passed without much interruption, sorting out uni work before getting ready for her little get together. You didn’t know who else was going, having spent most of your time with your other friends but the idea of having to see Sukuna made you cringe. Looking at your outfit, a casual look, not expecting anything big to occur. You made the walk towards her apartment bringing some wine with you as a gift as you finally found the tower of apartments.

Walking into the elevator you were about to press the button when you heard a giddy laugh telling you to keep the door open. “Omg Y/n, you look super cute.” The whine of her voice made you stare right back at her, so innocent but the man she had been pulling on making her look nothing more than his toy.

“Thanks.” You mutter refusing to meet Sukuna’s eyes, his arms tattoos on show as he wore a black shirt, most of the buttons undone to show his distinctive marked chest. He rolled his sleeves as you pressed the button to the floor as she rambled on about her day.

You watched her grab his hand, moving closer to his side as he looked lazily down at her. He really was a fucking cunt, with that sadistic smirk and taunting eyes. “…Ryo was telling me Satoru was interested in you.”

“That’s nice.” You muttered not wanting to have a conversation about the men you had met last night.

Sukuna finally looked at you, eyebrows raised as he looked up from the ground. His light brown eyes gazing up and down your body as he stared almost indecisively at you. She stood firm against him whining for him to apologise about yesterday, but he didn’t seem to care as he stared at you with those dull eyes of his.

“I don’t care if he apologises or not.” You finally mutter as you felt suffocated by the sheer pressure of his gaze. It was a longing and you felt uncomfortable under his eyes, she had barely noticed the significant glare he was giving to you as she flaunted herself to him. At least she had something going for her with those looks of her, her unawareness and ditsiness catched men’s eyes but the way Sukuna dismissed her flaunts made you wonder why he even bothered with her.

The door opened as you quickly stepped out, not wanting to be near either of them as you walked towards Nobara’s apartment. Knocking as her bright face emerged engulphing you in a hug, “come in, come in.”

“I got you this.” You pass her the wine as she takes it, seeing Sukuna and Yui come in, her mouth in a gawk as she eyes the pink haired man up and down.

She puts the wine down as she gives a hug to your friend, “and who is this?”

Sukuna looked to the side not wanting to speak as he scoured around the room for someone he would recognise, his eyes meeting your mutual friend Megumi’s. He gave a nod at the black-haired boy who began walking towards the four of you, “this is my boy…”

Before she could finish Megumi interrupted, arm across your shoulder with a grin, “y/n with other friends.” You rolled your eyes as he went over to Sukuna, giving him a pat on the shoulder, “and Sukuna, what you doing here? Work run out of ink, you gonna start sucking our bloods.”

“Real funny.” Sukuna’s voice was unamused as Megumi almost dragged him away from you all.

Nobara had left as you saw Yui look isolated and alone, it was weird, a new emotion you hadn’t seen as you patted her back lightly. “Let’s get a drink.”

She nodded as you took her hand moving her past others that you knew and towards where a pile of beverages were. You had to hand it to Nobara the apartment did look good, it fit her aesthetic perfectly and you could only wish for your apartment to feel homely. Looking back on your own, it wasn’t a home, it was just a convenient place to live for your university studies.

Yui began rambling about something, almost glad she wasn’t paying attention to her boyfriend who had been talking with Megumi on the balcony. You could see eyes fawn over him, not understanding how people could find him attractive. Your skin crawled as you looked at him one last time before listening to her as she spoke for the next half an hour. Sukuna came towards you both after a while and that’s when disaster struck…once again.

“I’m leaving.” He was blunt with his words as you stared at the pair's interaction.

She looked at him with soft eyes, “but you promised you’d stay longer than an hour.” You looked over to Sukuna waiting to hear what he’d say as he needed a good excuse to be a shit date for this gathering.

“Okay, and? I’m a working adult. I have shit going on.” He seemed almost tense, hand gripping his phone as his eyes flashed with a worry before a glare back at you.

She disregarded his words as she continued to whine, “we can sneak off if you want…”

“Fucking hell I don’t want to sleep with you.” He tried to speak calmly but others had heard what was occurring in the kitchen. Jaw clenched as if something really bad was happening and he needed to be there.

You rolled your eyes at the unnecessarily loud comment touching your friends shoulder to reassure her, “come on let’s go back to mine.”

Sukuna glared, not bothering to give her a goodbye as you explained to Nobara the issue before giving her a farewell. You took her back to yours as soon as she hit the couch she was out like a light. You didn’t understand how someone as pretty as her could get with someone as disgusting as Sukuna. Those stupid eyes, so intimidating and closed off to the rest of the world. You shook your head trying to not think of the devilish man as you went into your room, falling into your own slumber.

It had been a few days since the incident occurred, going to a lecture with her as she still spoke highly of Sukuna. Explaining how he had had other plans and how he apologised, it was a lie of course and you knew it. You had caught a glimpse of the multiple read messages that she had sent to him, no reply back as either he was being a cunt or something else had been occurring in his private life that he didn’t want to tell her.

She had been trying to persuade you to come back to the tattoo store, bribing you with Satoru’s number even though you had no need for the white haired man's number. She signed in defeat as you left your separate ways from the lecture.

The week continued on like this, her talking highly of Sukuna but the now unopened messages being a sign that he truly did not care. You tried to not look too long on the messages but the way you’d see her sometimes stare at her phone almost manifesting his response. It went on like this, her ignorance as it seemed she sent more than 10 messages a day in the past week. You didn’t question it, not wanting to be involved in a relationship you didn’t care for.

Having Saturday to yourself, the coffee-stained shirt is still soaking after a week due to not having bothered to actually clean it properly. Stupid Sukuna! You rubbed at your eyes wanting a relaxing evening after the studying you had done in the library most of the day. Finally getting into the blankets you sat cozied up in the covers as you put an anime on to watch.

You had only gained peace for less than 10 minutes before your phone was blaring, startling you in an instant. Your hand reached for your phone as you saw Yui’s name flash up, answering it tiredly, “hey what’s up?”

“Y/n.” Sukuna’s voice soothed out on the line, hearing your name from his mouth sending a shiver, “your stupid friend is drunk and at my place, fucking get her or I’m leaving her outside.”

“Wait? Sukuna yo…you can’t just leave her outside, and I don’t even have a car…”

He quickly interrupts, “I don’t care, we…I don’t need her right now.”

“You’re a real class a cunt.” You shout through the phone, he was cheating clearly, his misspoken words making you realise he was an even bigger jerk than you realised. Seeing the address in the chat as he had hanged up on you after you called him a cunt. It was more than a 20-minute walk and you refused to walk there, getting an uber seemed like your best bet, you didn’t understand why he didn’t let her scream or shout at him. He had been caught out and now she could see the real Sukuna that you saw.

The drive taking less than 5 minutes you told the driver to wait as you went up to his apartment, the area was nice. Almost too nice for a man with an attitude and mouth like his own, finally finding the door, you saw how it was slightly open as you heard shouting coming from within. Opening the door, you were met with Sukuna and Yui but another figure with a glum look and the exact same face as Sukuna.

“Took you long enough.” Sukuna scowled as you saw your friend in tears, instantly rushing inside to comfort her.

You glared at the boy before what seemed to be his twin or younger brother spoke up, “just make them leave Sukuna.” He didn’t seem as fuelled with anger when his brother spoke of it, but a fury flashed through your insides, tissues seemed to scatter his apartment as you finally got a look of it all.

It was a shock, pretty even something that you craved to live in, the aesthetic, the way the whole room was filled with so much comfort and warmth. Too bad a psychotic loser like Sukuna lived there. “Yo…you can’t just call my friends us..and make…make them come and get me. I…I’m not a child.” Tears flooded her face as you looked up at Sukuna ready to give him a piece of your mind.

“You really are an ass, how fucking dare you treat her like that, when all she ever fucking does is talk about how you’re such a sweet guy. I’m fucking glad she’s realised just how much of a twat you are.” His brother almost felt startled at what he was hearing looking at Sukuna for any indication of what you were talking about.

Sukuna instead grabbed your wrist pulling you towards what looked to be his kitchen, a pizza box on the side as the place was moderately tidy. “You don’t fucking get it do you?”

“What are…” He interrupted his finger on your mouth forcing you to shut up and listen to him.

You wafted his finger away waiting to hear his next words, “that guy over there is my twin, our grandfather died last Sunday.” Realisation hit you as you realised that was why he had been so tense, so on edge at Nobara’s get together. You put your hand to his shoulder to comfort him but stopped yourself waiting for him to continue, “your pathetic friend barged in here drunk and started calling us the pathetic ones.”

“I didn’t know, I’m sorry.” You whispered out almost feeling bad for the man.

He continued not meeting your gaze as he leant against the cabinet, eyes down, for a man with limited emotions he found it hard to express his next words without feeling somewhat sad. “I explained what happened to her and she told both of us to grow a pair and told my brother to stop crying like a twat, she can talk all the shit she likes about me. But about the people I fucking care about, I need the bitch gone now.”

“I’m sorry, I’ll take her now.” She wasn’t even that drunk, you could see it in her eyes, the glint of sympathy she wanted as she barged past you and clinged her arms on Sukuna’s neck. He pushed her away as she tried to go back onto him, embarrassment setting in for yourself.

“Come on daddy, let me take your mind off of your stupid gran…” His blood boiled as he pushed her away once more, you took the step between them, gripping her arm as you dragged her out.

You pulled her towards the door, looking at Sukuna’s twin who looked sad, they looked similar, but the distinct lack of piercings made him look even more vulnerable. “I’m so sorry for your loss.” You bowed your head before leaving with your idiotic friend.

“God Y/n, always ruining the fun.” She belted out as you both walked into the elevator.

“How disrespectful can you get; I know he’s an ass but to be so disrespectful to the dead.” You crossed your arms pissed at having been dragged into this fiasco as you looked at her almost gleeful expression.

She looked at herself in the mirror across from you both as you signed, “I don’t care, I was horny, and who cares, you said it yourself my boyfriends a cunt.”

“Ex-boyfriend.” You muttered under your breath.

“He can’t resist getting his dick wet, he’ll come back.” She spoke with a confidence you hadn’t seen before, as if her whole ditsy façade was to just gain popularity and attention. You didn’t look at her as you both walked toward the uber, making her split the cost of it all as you dropped her off, you hated it.

Hated how she sent an air kiss as she left, almost happy at the chaos she created. You knew what you had to do and that was to ignore her in lectures and hopefully never had to meet Sukuna ever again.

It seemed to be working, you’d sit beside Megumi in lectures now, a sadness in her eyes as you’d be the one ignoring her. Maybe it was because her comments didn’t sit right with you or maybe it was a way to leave a friend you didn’t care for. You hadn’t met Sukuna at all the week that followed the occurrence, you were glad to never have to see him again.

Walking into the coffee shop for your latest fix of caffeine, a storm has come across the horizon. An eeriness to the grey skies. You had gotten a bus further into town wanting to go to your fav route coffee store one far away from the likes of Sukuna. Eyes flicking at your drink you sat at a table pulling out your laptop to do some work as the grey skies slowly became a mist of darkness.

Time had caught onto you as you found yourself ushered outside at closing time rain pouring as you realised just how late it was and how the last bus had already left Bringing your phone as you stood under the shelter of the café, you went to get an uber when you felt a gust of wind and as a figure barged into you. “Fucking shitty ass rain.” It was a recognisable voice as you turned and met Sukuna, pink hair draped down across his face, as his coat barely covered him as he draped it across his shoulders. “For fucks sake it had to be you I met.”

“Fuck off, I was here first you came to me.” You scowled watching the rain pour as you went on the app to get you an Uber as quick as you could.

Sukuna’s eyes flashed to your phone, trickles of water on it as he stared at your screen, “I’ll give you a lift home, I don’t like being in debt to people.”

“You’re not though.” You mutter still looking down at your phone as you stared at the prices.

“You got rid of Yui,  I owe you.”

You didn’t understand his logic as it made no sense at all, “whatever you don’t owe me, and she isn’t my friend.”

He didn’t question it as he brought his car keys out, gesturing for you to follow as you did. It wasn’t like he was going to kill you and if Megumi was friends with him what was the harm in getting a free lift.. Even with his loud obnoxious almost suffocating presence in the rain it almost felt like the two of you could be civil.

He opened your door as you slipped inside the car, feeling the warm black leather seats as he chucked his coat to the back. The shirt he wore right across his skin as you stared at his tattoos, “it’s rude to stare.”

“Shut up.” You muttered looking out at the weather. It was gruesome and wild, and you could already see the evident traffic up ahead.

One hand stayed lazily on the steering wheel as he tapped on it as the other rested on the gear stick, he cleared his throat before finally speaking, “why did you stop being friends with her then?”

“Realised she was a bitch; I don’t want those types of people around me.” You continued to stare out of the window, looking up at the black sky, stars trickling through the rain.

He didn’t say anymore a tense atmosphere as you finally met his gaze again, his fingers tapping lightly to a song you didn’t know that was playing on the radio. “Why did you date her?” He moved forward as his jaw clenched checking his mirrors to see if he could go through a side street bypassing the traffic.

“I never did.” He muttered, still looking for a way out.

You rolled your eyes as you continued, “I might dislike her, but she spoke about you as if you were the best boyfriend in the world and now here you are acting like you never dated her.”

“God Y/n can you shut the fuck up?” You were startled by his words as he quickly went past the traffic indicator right as he turned into a side street making sure to not get caught in an uncomfortable situation again. “I never asked her out, it was a one-night stand, but she fucking kept coming to the tattoo place, and Nanami and Geto were getting pissed she said she’d leave only if I dated her and fucked her regularly.”

You were almost disgusting by the proposition, his agreement on it to make her go away and her own for making such a revolting idea. “You…you…” Unaware of what to say you trailed off as you refused to look back at him.

“Put your address in here.” He tossed his phone into your lap, easily unfolded as you put your address in without even questioning it. Putting his phone back up on the stand in his car, he continued, “why would a prissy girl like you ever become friends with someone like her?”

“She needed my help  studying.” You muttered not knowing how else to respond, it was true that you both had met out of convenience to one another. His finger motion on the wheel matched the rhythm of the song that currently played as you didn’t elaborate.

He turned to see what you were doing, how you stared out into the darkness all alone with nothing but an empty lonely apartment. “God you must be fun at parties.”

“Cut the crap Sukuna, what the fuck are you doing this for?”

“What’s this?” He gestured as he had seen you meet his gaze.

You rolled your eyes hating how he made you elaborate, “asking questions, offering me a lift home. What do you want? Sex? A good little cunt for you to fill, I knew I was right abou…”

“Y/n.” Your name felt piercingly loud against the inside of the car, “why do you always think the worst of me?”

“Because you’ve been an ass since day fucking one, gosh get off your high horse Sukuna nobody gives a fuck about this persona you have if you’re just going to act like a dick half the time.” Your words stung him as his jaw clenched pissed at how freely you spoke about his life.

“You’re giving me advice on persona’s; I knew from the first time you walked into the tattoo place that you hated Yui. Don’t talk to me about personas when you acted like you wanted to choke her to death.”

His words were filled with truth and malice as you looked down, “I…I did hate her…I do hate her.”

He didn’t expect your response, but your next words filled him with another emotion, “I was jealous, okay? She was so pretty to me, she could’ve had anyone, and she picked you, the guy who didn’t give a fuck about her. I hated her for it, hated how she got men left right and centre when all I got were guys interested in sex rather than a relationship.” You took a heavy breath as you couldn’t stop your rambling, couldn’t stop the freshly watered eyes from cascading down your face, “so yes Sukuna I fucking hate her, she is everything I’m not, everything a man wants.”

Sukuna didn’t know what to say as he put his car in park, grabbing your face in his hands as he forced you to look at him. “I know you don’t like me; I hate you as much as you fucking hate me. But you’re more than just a fuck to someone out there. Maybe it’s the guilt and grief I'm going through for not being around for my granddad as much but she is the opposite of you and was a cunt. You’re worth a whole lot more than her.”

You tried to turn away to stop staring into his eyes, his calloused hands gripped onto your face as you could feel just how intricate his fingers were. His grip tight as you felt his heavy breath against your own, “take me home.”

He let go in an instant not meeting your gaze as he drove in silence, it was too quiet for your liking. He stopped tapping the wheel as you just stared outside, watching how the rain pattered away against the roof. The arrival to your apartment complex seemed much faster as you looked at the gloomy elevator that would take you to your gloomy apartment. “What? Not going to invite me inside?”

“What do you think?” You muttered opening the door as you stepped into the rain.

You heard his own side open as he slipped out of the car, “well if you really want me too.” Rolling your eyes and not wanting to be around him you found yourself being followed by the boy, his eyes looking around the place. It was pretty, too pretty for someone like you, he watched you fumble to open your apartment. He expected to see your personality residue onto the walls but instead was met with nothing but a cream-coloured walls and the basic necessities. “What, you still moving in or something?”

You drop your stuff and take your shoes off ignoring his comment as you went straight to the kitchen. He quickly followed eyes widening to be met with another plainness, affectionless room. “Seriously why are you here?” You say getting some leftover food out of the fridge to warm up.

“I owe you.” He scratches the back of his head as he looks at the food.

You point at your food before speaking  again, “get two  plates.” He nodded eagerly as you pointed to where the plates were as you warmed it up on the stove. “You don’t owe me anything, you have me a lift home remember.”

“I owe you for my comment.” He doesn’t meet your gaze grabbing the two plates and putting them on the counter. “Your place, it's not very you.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” You question crossing your arms as you stared at the man.

He looked around seeing nothing of any value to you, “it’s not you, it’s just very plain and dull.”

“I’m plain and dull.” You bring the food over portioning it into the plates as you watch Sukuna look for forks to eat it with. If he had walked into this place without knowing it was yours he’d have thought it was a showroom.

You move and take your plate as you both go into the lounge right in front of the TV. “Yeah not with that mouth of yours.”

“Shut up.” You scowled sitting on the side of the couch as he sat on the other, you moved to put something on the TV as he watched you happily put on an anime that he recognised. He was surprised you had even let him step foot in your home but there really wasn’t anything to see of importance that he could mock.

He watched you eat and watch anime, so this is how you spent your days, uni, hanging out with friends, revising, eating and watching anime. “Y/n.”

“Yeah.” You muttered just as you put more food in your mouth.

“Why did you let me inside?”

You finally looked at him, plate empty as he put it on the table, you met his gaze, “we both hate each other, it’s not like i’ll ever have to see you again after this, and you said it yourself you owed me.”

“No, there’s something else, is it about what I said earlier.” He asked as you finally looked at him directly in the eyes.

You didn’t know how to reply as you stared at him softly, “I…I think you should leave.”

“For fucks sake, just tell me, like you said you won’t have to see me ever again after this.” His eyes looked up and down across your body. How you seemed so small when isolated, how that big mouth of yours that he wanted to shut up so badly. Had finally fallen silent.

You tried to think of an answer, but came to nothing, “I thought…that I was doing this to make me feel better, like I was getting back at her but instead I’m just being something I hate. I’m sorry, okay?”

“It’s fine, I’d have done the same, guess we’re both dicks then.” You stifle a laugh as you look at him with wide eyes.

“Maybe you’re not that bad.”

“I’m surprised I did call you a fool.”

“Foolish puppet actually.”

He chuckles as he looks at you his lip turning upwards as he looked at the anime, “you know I thought the beast titan was Erwins dad for a solid three months.”

“What? Erwin and Zeke are like 10 years apart.” You chuckle as you pause the episode on one of the many gory scenes, “let me guess you didn’t know who the female titan was either.”

“Of course I didn’t, do I look like I read manga?” He mused out putting his arm around the couch as he watched you on your knees face him. You seemed joyful talking about anime with him, as for what seemed like hours the two of you spoke about different anime’s and stuff you both enjoyed.

“…you can’t be serious you got an anime tattoo.” You had moved closer to him; his arm touched your side as you begged for him to show you.

He turned around lifting his shirt up as it remained up to his neck. That’s when you saw the cascades of different colours and pictures around his back, the hunter x hunter phantom troupe spider being under his shoulder as you moved your finger to trace it. “Number four really.”

“Don’t lie and say you aren’t another whore for Hisoka.” His skin shivers as you trace each leg, the intricacy of all his tattoos making your mind go wild. Maybe he wasn’t as bad as you had initially thought, maybe there was something more to him.

He put his shirt down as he turned to meet your eyes again you had moved closer and without realising his face was only a mere centimetres away from your own. “Sorry.” You whisper moving backwards a big in a shuffle.

“Don’t worry about it, ever thought about it then?”

“Thought about what?”

He gestured to his arm and chest tattoos as you shrugged, “maybe, but I’m indecisive it’d have to be something I really liked.”

“Well Satoru was telling me you liked my designs.” Your eyes widened at how you have been practically exposed by Satoru.

He chuckles tilting his head back as you could see his neck tattoos more, “I could always give you one.”

“You sure you wouldn’t want to give me a flower one instead.” You teased as he rolled his eyes coming closer to your body.

“I know exactly where I’d put it.” His finger grazed to your exposed arm, skimming up and down before moving up to your shoulder and down to just where your neck was.

Your breath hitched as his finger skimmed past the material nearly divulging into where your two breasts met. He watched how you gave a flushed look before smirking, removing his hand, “it’s late, pass me your phone.”

“W…why?” You spoke already, grabbing it to give to him.

“So you can have my number, we should hang out again.” His fingers typed into the new contact, easily writing his name and number as he passed back the phone.

You nodded as you walked with him towards the door, he grabbed his stuff before you saw him wave goodbye before leaving. You leant against the door as you grabbed your phone seeing his stupid name with the skull emoji, quickly typing about how you enjoyed tonight you threw your phone to the side as you felt a feeling you hated entirely.

It had been a week since both you and Sukuna had met again, but the multiple texts you both sent one another had been divulging into some sort of feeling of friendship. You had invited him to your best friends birthday celebration after feeling that both of you had somewhat become friends. He seemed happy to come along a clear contrast to when he had been made to go to the housewarming a couple weeks back.

He met you outside your apartment, seeing how you came out in a thin red dress, it was short, but you looked amazing. He had worn a similar outfit that he wore weeks prior the difference being the shirt looked a lot tighter and there had been a couple more unbuttons undone. A metal necklace cascaded down his neck brushing back and forth against the air and his skin and rings embodied his veined fingers. He watched you happily skip into the car; he couldn’t help but smile but as soon as you stepped inside the dickhead in him came out. “Sure this is a birthday party and not a strip club.”

“Aww you think I could become a stripper.” You pout as you look at the mirror putting more lipgloss on too sooth your lips. He rolled his eyes reversing out as he looked behind you both, arm on your seat as you couldn’t help but stare at his chest with the black lines and his arms that had their own.

He hadn’t noticed your staring instead moving right out and making you put the destination into his phone, “how long are you staying till?”

“However long you want.” You say typing the destination before going into his camera, “your cameras better.”

You took a couple pictures as you sent them to yourself choosing which one was the best one before putting his phone back on the grip. “She’s your friend.”

“I thought you didn’t like stuff like this.”

“What makes you say that?” His arm was lazily against the wheel as he moved it at every turn.

You shrugged before answering, “it’s a uni party, you don’t seem like the type to go to ones.”

“Just because I didn’t go to shitty uni doesn’t mean I won’t fit in, idiot.”

You rolled your eyes as you looked back on the road, his other hand scratching  his jaw. “Megumi should be there if you don’t want to be aroun…”

“I'm going with you, why would I leave you?” He didn’t meet your gaze; he already knew that if did see those wide eyes and that tiny dress one more time he wouldn’t be able to help himself take you in the car.

You nodded not saying anymore as he began rambling about some client that wanted the ugliest tattoo possible, “why did you just tell him to fuck off?”

“What makes you think I didn’t, I don’t do shitty tattoos.” His grip tightened against the wheel as he turned to see what you were doing. Your dress having ridden up as your thighs were on show, he stared at them before meeting the road gaze again.

You nodded as you increased the volume on the song that was playing, “what’s a shitty tattoo to you?”

“Flowers, girly shit.”

“You literally named one thing.” You roll your eyes as he watches you change the song from his phone, your chest on top of his arm on the gear stick as he was able to see how pretty your tits sat in the dress.

He looked down before shaking his head to look outside the windows, “flowers are shitty, any shitty type of animal.”

“What so if I asked for a dolphin you wouldn’t give me one?” He raised an eyebrow as you continued, “oh come on dolphins could be a look.”

“No they wouldn’t, they look shitty and you don’t even like dolphins.”

You shrugged leaning back in your seat, “and how would you know?”

“Because I know you, come on.” He had parked without you realising as you both got out of the car. He saw the tall high rise of buildings; it was similar to your own complex but with a lot more emotion that he’d never seen from yours.

He watched you grab his sleeve to tug him along as he stood behind you, watching how your thighs moved through the thin fabric. It was almost a blessing to have to look down at you as the ability to see how your tits perked up made his head run wild. “So what’s her name again?”

“Maki, and no she already has a boyfriend.” You stepped into the elevator, as he rolled his eyes at your comment.

“I didn’t want to fuck your best friend anyway.” He muttered as he leant against the railing, eyes flashing to how perfect you looked all dolled up in that outfit. He licked his lips as he continued, “not every girl I see I want to fuck.”

“That is true, you haven’t tried to fuck me.” He didn’t know why he almost felt sad by your comment, there of course had been a reason for not having tried to fuck you but it was stupid and pushed aside.

You both walked out as his hand moved to your back guiding you in a direction even he didn’t know about. “I swear it’s on this floor.”

“You got us lost basically,” you signed as you grabbed your phone pushing Maki’s number as you heard her scream through the phone. Sukuna gave a side eye as you elbowed his side to not be a cunt for once.

“Yeah 5th floor, number 511.” Sukuna grabbed your hand as he had seen that door, forcing you to follow as even with his tight grip. You had expected his hands to feel calloused against your own, but a burst of warmth filled you as you followed him. He knocked on the door as Maki instantly opened grabbing you into a hug, “and who is this?”

“This is Sukuna, I invited him.” You say as she lets go of you, her hair up and a giddy smile at the drink she was holding.

You handed her her present before she came up to Sukuna, “I heard you were a dick by Megumi.”

“Maki you can…”

“No it's true, where is the twat anyway?” Sukuna muttered as Maki hadn’t bothered to apologise instead unwrapping her present happily.

“By the balcony, probably.” He nodded but didn’t leave to go find him, instead sticking your side.

You met his gaze as you didn’t understand why he hadn’t left to mingle or find someone to hook up with, “not going to find Megumi.”

“I said I wouldn’t leave your side.” You nod as he continued, “come on let’s get a drink.”

He dragged you to where the drinks were, passing you a cup as he filled it with some alcohol, he saw Megumi come up towards you both, already partially drunk. “Y/n, Sukuna…together in the same room, I must be dying.”

“Real funny, I don’t see you with anybody.” Sukuna mused as he took a large sip of his drink.

Megumi rolled his eyes planting his arm across your shoulder seeing how tense Sukuna became in a matter of seconds, “go on how did you end up here then?”

“We’re friends.”

“You called him a dickhead two weeks ago.”

You chuckled at your past, his eyebrow raised wanting to hear an explanation of the comment, “that’s because he is one.” You moved to his face, your hand out as you squished his cheeks with one hand, “aren’t you?”

“You better answer her.” Megumi spoke, trying to suppress a laugh at how the big old mighty Sukuna was getting his face squished by you.

Sukuna rolled his eyes as you continued squishing his face, your warmth in your fingers making his ears prick a red colour, “yeah…I am.”

“Good boy.” You giggled letting go of him as Megumi began pouring more alcohol in both your drinks. It seemed like the party would have nothing except drinking and couples making out, you didn’t care seeing how much fun Maki was having with her boyfriend.

You and Sukuna had moved to the couch after Megumi had gotten distracted by Maki’s god, he was probably on the ground letting her dog sleep on him. Sukuna’s voice ringed in your ear as the loud music had made it hard for you both to speak normally, “you were right?”

“Is the Sukuna admitting I was right?” You teased taking a large slip as the strap of your dress had fallen off your shoulder due to having been bumped into by a lot of people.

“Oh shut it.” He didn’t continue with his words, instead moving closer to you, maybe it was the alcohol, or maybe it was just how beautiful you looked. His eyes gazed across your body, as he moved his hand to re-adjust your strap. His fingers gazing right where your arm was, “a tattoo right there.”

“I’ll have to get one there then.” You replied instantly back to him hoping he’d get the hint.

He nodded his hand tracing your skin, “I’ll give you a good tattoo, make it ruin you.” He didn’t know what he was saying, feeling you move closer to him as if you were just about to meet his lips.

“WHAT THE FUCK?” It was a shout from the doorway as you saw Yui almost jump right on you with her devilish claws. Both you and Sukuna became startled by the action as you both jumped abruptly away from one another.

Maki had come as she stood between the three of you, confusion setting in as she realised just how bad the situation was. “Yui what the fuck?”

“Why are you shouting at me, she’s the one trying to make out with my boyfriend?” The music seemed to settle into quietness as everybody began staring at the scene, you didn’t know what to say. They weren’t dating you knew that but were you really just about to kiss him, the man you had hated those weeks ago, would you have let him do more to you.

You shook your head as you were about to speak but got interrupted, “we aren’t fucking dating, god there really is nothing up there, we were never dating and you’re just a fucking bitch who sleeps around.”

“So you admit that you just wanted to fuck me.” You and Maki stared at one another as you watched what Sukuna would say next.

“Yeah, worst sex I’ve had in a while though.” Your eyes widened at the comment as you tried to suppress a laugh before she stared at you.

Her eyes flicked with rage at how you laughed at his comment, “you hated him, how could you be such a shit friend?”

“We were never friends, you tried to use me to come with you to errands and help you with shit, that’s not being friends.” You mutter crossing your arms as Maki almost looked like she was ready to fight Yui for her fake comments.

Yui looked between the three of you ready to punch you right in your face, “I fucking hate you, he’s going to realise just how boring and selfish you are, and he’ll drop you just like he did too me. You wanna know why you haven’t had a boyfriend in a whilst…it’s because every single one of them found out how dull and boring you are. He’ll see it, he’ll see how you’re a fucking cunt that just gets used for guy’s dicks.”

She stormed out of the apartment, as you let out a heavy breath. You needed fresh air as you left the silence of the room going past everybody and into Maki’s room. Knowing she had a balcony that attached to her window. Crawling out of it as you leant against the railing you saw the bright lights of the city cascade out into the sky. Cold air hitting your body as you thought about her comments, every insecurity you had had was true, you heard the window open as Sukuna stepped outside.

“You’re going to get cold, dumbass.” You don’t laugh at his comment, instead leaning  further into the balcony. “You don’t believe what she said right, she’s a fucking cunt and her words were lies Y/n.”

“You don’t understand.” You continued staring at the colourful patterns of the stars, all so pretty. He moved closer resting his shoulders against your own as he could almost see you shiver.

He met your eyeline, watching how you stared up into the dark sky, he knew you saw more than the dark. He could see it in your eyes the way you stared at the sky with such lust to explore its secrets, “explain to me then.”

“You’re you…and I’m me, I’m used to guys getting their dicks wet to me, and you use others to get your own…”

You trailed off not wanting to hear his next words, “you really are still a cunt, listen to me, Yui lied, you and I both know she’s a fucking cunt so why the fuck do you believe it.”

“Because you fucking slept with her.” You didn’t know why you shouted the comment out, it was unnecessary and made no actual sense at all.

Sukuna stayed silent, pink hair almost dropping down to his face in a type of misery, “so what you want me to fuck tou and then leave you, you want to be another one-night stand, is that all you see me as.”

“No…” you had no other words as you both stared at one another in silence, his eyes flicking across to your lips. As he moved closer, face almost touching one another’s as you heard his heavy breath against your own, mouths almost touching.

He looked down as his hands had gripped your sides ready to bring your mouth to his own, “I don’t want you to be another one-night stand.”

“Why?”

“Because you mean a lo…”  He got interrupted by the sound of a loud crash occurring inside, “fuck that’s Megumi.”

“We need to check on him.” Your minty breath hit his face as you spoke worried for your friend, you were the first to apart away; he had wished to feel your tender lips on his own but instead was now left out in the dark.

He watched you leave as you went to go check on Megumi, taking a sharp breath as he followed you. You both ended up finding Megumi with the dog wrapped around him, “he’s cuddling the fucking dog.”

“Sorry I need a picture of this.” You spoke fiddly as you brought your phone out taking different angled photos of Megumi being cuddled by Maki’s dog.

Sukuna rolled his eyes before he nudged Megumi with his food, “we’re gonna have to take him home.”

You nodded as you and Sukuna brought him up, his arms on both your shoulders as he stirred, “you two are such nice people:”

“Yeah yeah.” You muttered as you helped him towards Sukuna’s, both putting him in the back as Megumi looked like he was about to fall asleep again.

“I’ll take him to mine, after I drop you back home.” You nod as you both spent the rest of the car journey in silence, not talking about the earlier occurrence of you both nearly kissing twice.

The ride had been quick as you were met with the dull buildings once more, Sukuna watched how you said a simple goodbye, his hand grabbing your wrist to stop you. “Come round the tattoo shop at 8pm.”

“Why?” you questioned as his touch sent a shiver down your spine.

“Just come shitty woman.” You nodded as he let go of your hand watching you walk into your apartment.

“You really…why did you scream?” Megumi voice startled him as she shouted a fuck at hearing Megumi talk, “anyway, you really like her don’t you.”

“Is it that obvious.”

Megumi nodded leaning back in his seat, “you’re a dick to everybody it’s weird seeing you be nice to someone.”

“I’m not a dick to everybody.” Sukuna spoke as he started driving towards his apartments

Megumi rolled his eyes as he looked out of the window, “don’t hurt her.”

“I wouldn’t.” Sukuna mutters as he looks down knowing tomorrow would be the day he told you the absolute truth.

The next day came quicker than expected as you had a couple lectures occurring and some other crap to get onto. Before you even knew it 8pm had arrived as you found yourself walking the same street you had walked a couple weeks back. The same bricks and neon sign outside the place that made the place give off the vibe of a tattoo shop.

Walking inside as the bell indicated a customer had come, it seemed that they had had their influx in customers as Satoru seemed to be annoying Nanami who had ice on his head and Geto tapped away at the counter. “Y/n.” Satoru shouted as he bolted up and met you, “you never came back.”

“Yeah some stuff happened, you know where Sukuna is?” You question as all three of them became silent, probably not understanding why you would need the man you had been cussing out a few weeks ago.

“Sukuna.” Geto hesitantly shouted out as he looked at you, “you’re not going to kick him are you,”

“What? No!” You mutter as you see the pink haired man come down shirtless, his tattoos all on show as you got a glimpse of every single one perfectly resting across his body. “Y/n, you’re early.”

He checked his watch seeing the time being 7:50, as you gave him a small smile, “so what did you need me for?”

“To give you a tattoo idiot.” He spoke it as of you were the one who had been the dumb one in the situation.

The three men stared at you both as you stepped towards him, bodies too close for what they’d class as enemies. “Is anybody going to explain this?” Satoru muttered.

Sukuna rolled his eyes as he waited for your response, you didn’t think he’d actually be the one to give you your first tattoo, but you nodded never less. “Okay, but if you mess up I will stab you’ll

“If you’re into that, I don’t judge.” He chuckles as you jab your elbow into his chest, “give her the forms.”

Geto nodded as he passed you the forms you needed to fill out all three wanting to hear how the two of you had somehow become close, “don’t you three have plans?”

That’s when they realised why he had booked you in so late, all three had prior engagements and it’d leave you and him alone to your own devices. Satoru signed as he wanted to hear more but ended being dragged out by Nanami before Geto followed just as you handed the forms back to Sukuna

He remained shirtless as he took you to the back, locking the door of the reception to make sure nobody came in. He patted the seat gesturing for you to sit down as you looked hesitantly between the needles and the seat, “what you want to sit on my lap, will that make you feel better?”

“Shut up.” You muttered as you went to the black chair, instead feeling his grip on your wrist.

“What? Scared I’ll bite,” you hated how he teased you and instead of dismissing it and getting flushed you found yourself sitting right on his thigh, you could almost feel like much muscle he had under his joggers as your hand stayed on your own thighs.

He smirked seeing you shift your weight easily, “look at you, finally listening for once.”

“I listen.”

“No you don’t, now what are you thinking?” He passes the book with many designs from his coworkers scattering each page. You instantly went to his page, looking at all the intricate details of different types before you saw the designs of dragons as it breathed out fire. He watched you stare at it, finger gliding across it as he moved your hair to the side, head on your shoulder as he spoke, “you want a dragon.”

You nodded eagerly at the small design, as he put the book down and looked at you with soft eyes, “where do you want it?” You point to the top of your arm, the arm he had touched last night, the arm that still had his finger ingrained into your skin. His eyes flicked to your arm; you wore a long sleeve shirt as he knew you’d have to take it off to get right up to the top of your arm.

“This is a ploy to get me naked isn’t it.” You teased as you lifted your shirt above your head, Sukuna trying to say a word as now the two of you were shirtless in front of one another.

He tried to hide his smirk as he got the stencil ready for your arm, he knew it’d hurt, knew you’d want to grab onto something so why not grab onto him. “If I wanted to see you naked I wouldn’t do it here.”

Your eyes widened feeling the rubbing alcohol on your arm drip down to your wrist, “which one was your first?”

You changed the subject as he rubbed the area before grabbing the stencil that was to the side of you both, “the one on my finger.”

His other hand had moved the stencil up to your arm whilst your fingers grabbed his hand seeing the skull right on the edge of his right hand. “It’s pretty.”

“Yeah my parents hit me so hard after I got it done.” You chuckled lightly feeling his move his hand away from you, sad at his quick movement as you played with your own fingers. You felt the stencil being pulled away from your arm as you could see the small outline of a dragon and its fire across your arm. “Like it?”

You nodded eagerly as you watched him prepare the equipment you didn’t know what he was doing but admired each concentrated move that he had. Eyes widening when he looked up at you with a smirk having noticed your continuous looks at him, “don’t worry, it won’t hurt and if it does, tough.”

“And I thought you were going to be encouraging.” You mumble as you stare at your arm, the blue marks making your insides almost cave in at how scared you actually were.

He chuckled lightly just as he finished ready to start on the outline, he was almost glad it was just an outline with no shading knowing in an instant you’d be in much more pain. “You’ll be fine, I would tell you to hold my shirt but…you could always hold onto my thigh?”

“Just start.” You fidgeted on his thigh, legs swinging as you began hearing a low hum of a needle, feeling some other liquid go across the lines. He looked directly at you nodding to make sure you knew it was about to occur.

Your hands stayed on your lap as you felt the first mark take place, pain instantly rushing to that one spot as you grabbed his thigh, just close to where his crotch was. He dismissed how your hand was so close yet so far away from his cock instead asking if you were okay, after seeing you nod, he continued as the pain began to subdue. You couldn’t lie and say your eyes hadn’t begun watering because they had. You wiped it away with your other hand as you felt Sukuna move onto the fire part. You could never understand how he’d gone through the pain of all of his tattoos, the ones across his arm and chest, his fingers and back and most likely having some on his legs as well.

You watched how he’d occasionally look back at your gaze, see if you were doing fine with pain. Always giving him a reassuring look back to make sure he knew that you could handle it, you felt him finally relax as he the low hum stopped, your hand still on his thigh as he smiled at the design. He grabbed his phone from the side taking a picture of it before passing it for you to see yourself.

The small intricate details had done on the dragon was perfect, the way he had started to put stuff away whilst you still sat on him and the way you could still see your photos from last night in the corner. He hadn’t deleted them , kept them for some unknown reason and you definitely were not going to ask him why he still had the images.

“Let me dress it and bandage it for you.” You nodded but he remained still as you stared at the image, “I need you to get up, dumbass.”

“Sorry.” You mutter standing up and sitting on the actual chair, eyes staring at the details of it all. You had a tattoo and not just that it was a tattoo that Sukuna had designed and placed on you. It was something he was proud of, he watched you stare at his phone, probably unaware that it was on you and not just a picture.

Signing he grabbed the dressing and bandages, standing up to start wrapping it around your arm, you felt startled when his cold fingertips touched your arm. Putting his phone down as you saw the cling film around you, a redness coming from the tattoo, as he began telling you what to do every night and giving you some leaflet on it. “…don’t worry though I’ll text you to make sure you remember.”

“I’ll remember.” You put your shirt back on as you whined the comment out.

“I’ll text you to make sure you remember.” He repeats already knowing that you’d become too lazy to even bother to change the dressing every night.

“So mean.” You pout as he takes you back to the front, leaning against the counter as the dark sky stood out for the both of you to see, “so how much is it?”

You had already gotten your credit card out ready to pay for it, but his hand stopped you, “It’s free.”

“What? No, take the card.” You almost push your money onto him not wanting to take something for free. He takes the card before putting it right back into your arm, almost chucking it at you as he did, “Sukuna please just take it.”

“No.”

“I will never talk to you again if you don’t take it.”

“Okay.” You both glared at one another in silence waiting for one of you to crack, it just had to be you, however.

“I hate you.”

He crossed his arms smirking as he came round to the front leaning against the counter, “no you don’t.”

“Yes I do.” He cocks his head to the side, you watch as each of his muscles tense up as he looks down to you, his face coming closer and closer each time. Hand moving to hold the side of your face, as you looked up at him.

“You can pay me back another way.” He whispers softly as his lips brushed against your own, feeling a hungry need to kiss him, his other hand had moved to your waist ready to bring you closer to him.

You felt his hot breath hit your lips, the way he licked his lips with a hunger, your face moving closer as he moved his hands moved to his shoulders to meet his eyeline. He felt pushed against the counter as he leant against it watching how you moved one of your fingers to his jaw caressing his face as you looked down between his eyes and mouth. Before finally moving your finger, mouth ready to kiss his own before both being startled by the buzz of the door opening.

“Sukuna.” It was a voice you had recognised prior, as you turned to be met with Sukuna’s twin brother.

Sukuna looked between you and his brother, signing at how this had been the third time he had been cockblocked. All he wanted to do was kiss you, was to take you out, call you his but it felt like the universe had had other plans.

“What?”

You stood between the two of them as his twin stared at you, “Mum said to come and drop this off.” He showed a bag with what looked like some old clothes, you didn’t question it instead smiling at the boy. “You’re the girl from a couple weeks back.”

“Hi, yeah I’m Y/n.” You put your hand out as his twin takes it, Sukuna rolling his eyes as he grabbed the old clothes, he looked between the clothes before finding what he was looking for. It was something you recognised, as you let go of the boy's hand.

“Itadori.” You nodded as the boy looked confused as the two of you stared at the old shirt, he eyes you up and down almost admiring how you looked so sweet and sexy at the same time.

“I told you I had it,” Sukuna chuckled as he showed you the old retro Pokémon shirt he owned, it was old, something a 13-year-old wore and not a grown ass man. You had remembered a conversation the two of you had had earlier on last week where he had rambled on about how he loved Pokémon and had the biggest crush on Jessie which you never understood.

“It’s still a lame character to simp over.” He had been pointing to the destroyed Jessie as Itadori felt uncomfortable invading on a private moment between the two of you.

“Anyway, nice to meet you, Sukuna suck a dick, later.” He walked back out of the store as Sukuna gave him the finger before turning back to you, he knew the moment had been ruined but a hungry need had erupted at how he needed to have you. He had seen how Itadori had stared and watched the closeness of you both, had looked you up and down, looked at what was his with a look of hunger.

Sukuna, grabbed his shirt quickly putting it on before grabbing the bag and your hand in his other, “where are we going?”

You questioned as he locked the place up before grabbing your wrist once more and dragging you to his car. “Back to mine.”

“Wh…” He had thrown the bag in the car and pushed your back against the door, hands trapping you as he moved closer and closer to you, making you seem ever so small to him. He smirked as he interrupted, hand grabbing your jaw as he gave you a sadistic grin.

“Nobody looks at what’s mine and sweetheart…you’re now mine.” Your breath hitched as his other hand grabbed your waist arching you into the car as his lips found its way onto your own.

The kiss he had craved for so long occurred in a matter of seconds, your hands moving to his hair as you tugged at the pink locks. Your moans making his head spin as his tongue divulged into your own, gliding back and forth with your own, he brought your body even closer to his own. Mouths craving one another as you had gotten the kiss you had only dreamt about. Saliva dripped down your jaw as he let go off, thumb wiping it away as he looked at you with almost hungry eyes.

“I’m taking you back to mine and making every single fucking person know that you’re mine, okay baby.” He hand moved to your jaw grabbing a hold of it as he was waiting for an answer, waiting to hear the yes he craved.

“Okay Sakun…”

“Try again.” He moved your mouth to skim past his lips again, already seeing how much you craved to feel his lips once more as you tried to reach his own.

You took a sharp breath as you spoke to give him the power he wanted, “yes sir.”

“Good girl, get in the car.” His words were quick as you found yourself quickly entering not knowing what had gotten between the two of you as soon as he stepped inside the car, his hand rested on your thigh as he quickly drove out to get to his apartment.

A quick - most likely over the speed limit - journey later, his hand on your back made your insiders quiver at the sensation of what was to occur. Once you both began walking past the elevator, the tense atmosphere you both had gone through in the elevator having not helped, you found yourself finally getting the confidence to speak.

“Are we…”

He interrupted you as he finally unlocked the door, pushing you through as you felt yourself pressed against the inside of his apartment. His lips moving across your neck as he spoke the words you had needed to hear from the beginning, “you aren’t some fuck, you’re mine.”

“I…I don’t want to disappoint you.” You breathed out after thinking hard, his lips left your neck as he looked into those deep eyes of yours. Pools of lust and love cascading down as he couldn’t help but bring his two hands to cup your face.

“You would never disappoint me baby, after I’m done stuffing you full of me, I’ll prove to you just how much you mean to me.” His voice was a quiet whisper as he kissed you once again, your hands quickly kissing him back as he continued to press you against the door. Hands roaming your body as he brought comfort and love to every part of you.

His lips left your own as he kissed down your neck, hands moving to your thighs to bring you up as you wrapped your legs around his waist. Watching how you arched your neck for him, as he bit and sucked at your neck wary to not harm your arm as he walked towards his room.

Pushing you in as he threw you onto the bed, taking his shirt off as his arms moved to the side of your body. A predator ready to hunt down his prey, his hand went under your chin making you look up at him as he spoke, “I’m going to make you call me yours by the end of the night, sweetheart, make that pretty cunt drip with me in you.”

He smoothed your hair before moving his hands to your side, watching you nod at his actions. His fingers moving your shirt above your head. Even if you had been exposed to him previously, it felt a lot more intimate now, his hungry eyes wanting to encase every essence of you. “So pretty.” He mumbled as he unhooked your bra letting your tits perk up to the exposed air.

He watched how your face became flushed, as his hands roamed across his chest and stomach, leaving soft kisses down your body as your fingers outlined his tattoos. “Sir…I want you,” your whine made Sukuna look up, his mouth had salivated your nipples as a trail of spit led from his bottom lip to your hard nipple.

“Keep begging,” his words were harsh as he went back to sucking on your nipples, a need for his hardened cock to divulge right into your wet slick filled cunt made you frustrated.

“Pleas…sir,” you moaned as he bit at your nipple, watching how you arch your back into his skin, “I need you.”

“Stupid slut, can’t live without my cock, right?” He swirled his tongue against your nipple as his hands had moved your jeans down, eyes fixated on the way your pretty cunt had been covered.

“I can…’t.” Your whines filled his apartment as he moved his mouth across your stomach, feeling how your hands had moved into his hair, tugging at the strands to go lower. His teeth gripped the fabric as he pulled it down instantly seeing the slick having dampened your underwear. He pulled it away, chucking it onto his desk as his mouth instantly met your clit, spreading your legs to beside his body.

Licking and sucking at the folds that divulged into your cunt, your moans filled the room as one of his hands began kneading at your breasts, mouth covered in slick. “Mo…more.”

He listened to your babbling whines, moving his tongue right into your cunt, his other hands moving to your clit as he rubbed circles with his thumb. You arched your back as soon as you felt his tongue glide through your warm cunt, he could taste the coating of slick run down his tongue mixing with his saliva. It wasn’t common for Sukuna to go down on girls, he knew most of his one-night stands had been ones of getting sucked off and then fucking them. He couldn’t tell you the last time he had gone down on a girl, but the way you gripped at his hair, pushed him further. He knew you would be the only girl he’d ever go down on, with your swollen clit and folds that were encased in slick.

How could he not resist?

His tongue continued to lap inside your cunt, your moans for his tongue to go deeper as the bridge of his nose touched his fingers, he moved his slick covered fingers across your nipples before sticking his fingers right into your warm mouth. You easily took the two fingers sucking and wrapping your tongue around them. Sukuna knew why he was eating you out, he wanted you to feel pleasure, he wanted you to know you had his undivided attention, that he was the only man to make you feel good.

You felt a knot in your stomach already feeling cum start to gush down right into his mouth, he could sense it as his tongue movement became faster, rougher even, your moaning making his ever-growing cock become painfully hard. “Cum in my mouth.” He mumbled through his licks, on command white gushed from your cunt as he mouth was coated in a wet white liquid.

He looked up at you as his mouth remained near your cunt, his fingers moved from mouth as he licked his lips wiping the rest of the cum on his arm as he watched your dazed expression. He moved up, kneeling between your spread legs as he moved down to capture your lips, you could taste yourself on his mouth, his mouth sucking at your tongue as he moved his mouth down your neck. Giving a long lick across your jaw and down to your collarbone, “want me to stuff you now baby, make you full.”

“Ye…yes sir.” He couldn’t help but admire your expression, the way your eyes were eager as your hands moved to his joggers, already seeing his hard cunt ready for you. Mouth watering as he pulled his joggers away, his muscled thighs that could crush you in an instant between your dripping cunt as his bulge was more evident.

He couldn’t help but stop and stare as he took his boxers off, seeing how pretty you looked with the dishevelled her and look of admiration. The girl he had spilt coffee on was underneath him, begging to be filled with his cock. He couldn’t help but feel cock as his cock was in his hands, pumping his hand lazily around it before moving it across your clit and slick. “Please…put it in me.”

He smirked at your whines before aligning his cock right into your core, he brought both your legs up between his arms and chest as he stayed between your spread legs. “You want to be my good girl.”

“Ye…yes I’ll be your good girl,” at the sound of this his cock instantly pushed into your cunt, “Agh S…ir.”

Your breathing had become heavy as he groaned at the feeling of your cunt, “so tight, pretty girl.”

His hands had moved onto the bed as he encased your face, each thrust making you moan, your hands on his back, scratching against his many tattoos as he brought his face closer to your own. “You’re so fucking perfect.”

His words hit you as you looked into his eyes, love pooling from them as you kissed him slowly, each thrust becoming softer and slower as he kept a steady rhythm as you finally spoke the words he had needed to hear. “I…like you Sukuna.”

“Ryo, call me Ryo.” He whispered as he kissed your jaw, each thrust making you whine into his ear as something in your heart felt full at his allowance to let you call him a name he had been adamant against, he continued with more comforting words of, “you’re everything to me.”

His words were comforting, he would never understand why he had been such a cunt to you at the beginning. But being deep inside of you, the trust you had for him as both your foreheads touched, his eyes flashing with love against your own. It must have been fate that brought you both together on that windy night, he didn’t know what else it could be.

The full moon shone through the window, each thrust sending you a shock of love and comfort as he could feel how your legs twitched beside his own. He kissed you one last time feeling your second orgasm come through as he sloppily continued to fuck you, he saw how tears welled up in your eyes. He wiped them with his hand kissing your cheek as your hands remained around his body as he rode his own orgasm out. Your cunt stuffed and filled with his cum as he kept his cock inside of you, looking into your eyes, head resting against your chest. As he heard your heavy breathing one of your hands moving to caress his pink hair as you both stayed like this.

He would never know how this moment occurred, but he did know that the prettiest most annoying girl he had ever met was underneath him and he finally understood what paradise really was like.

i’d really appreciate if you guys could leave a like, reblog or comment, thanks x

if you guys want to be a part of a tag list, just reply to any post and i’ll add you xx

@samusimp @alaina-rose13 @crispychannie @underratedmage @jennammaee @cathy8taffy @sugacious @moonlightaangel @kat-sukis-hoe @effmigentlywithachainsaw @swankiifiied @maat-the-prescriptive @missmultifangirl @tvwhoresblog @kuroos-world @levisfilm @katsuhera @answer-the-sirens @animexholic @wapbenders @the-shota-king-masayuki @bakugousmrs @crystal-lilac @dai-tsukki-desu @fandomsinthegalaxies @crimsonbows-and-arrows  @admin-in-residence @otterlockholmes @gabrann @zlatanakermann @c0urtn3y @bakuhoesworld @halloweeniebicth @jaegerswifey @imthatweeb0509 @decayedz  @xnanaroguex @kc-braun @lightningprophet @gojo-infinity @onyxoverride @bummie @suna-reversed @hxneycxxkie @fyowyn-writes​ 

[professorrw]

Mistakes, a Loki One-Shot

Warnings: Angst, Smut, attempted murder, mentions of death, enemies-to-lovers

Request: “Can you do a Loki one shot? enemies to lovers troupe? a lot of angst pls -moon”

Word Count: 2195

A/N: I hope this was good! I’ve never written angst so I tried my best! And yeah, Loki doesn’t hate Y/N, it’s more like she hates him in the beginning but I tried. If you have any tips please message me or comment! Reblog and like if you enjoyed!

Loki, God of Mischief. During his attack on New York he managed to kill 80 people. One of them being your mother, your anchor. She had been with you through it all. She supported you no matter what. When you wanted to enlist in the military she let you and when you were discharged she was still there for you. 

When you left the Marines you began to work as a S.H.I.E.L.D. Agent. Your current assignment was to watch over Loki, who was being held at the Avengers base. The assignment was perfect. You could finally get revenge on Loki for taking away your only family.

If any of the Avengers found out about your mother’s death they probably wouldn’t let you watch him. And they shouldn’t. When you got the chance, you were going to kill him. It didn’t matter that you might go to jail or get fired. He deserved it, and you were going to serve the justice your mother and all his other victims deserved.

Monday rolled around and you arrived on the base. Loki would be held in a room made of see-through electric walls. Even if he tried, he wouldn’t be able to escape. You were in control of the wall. If you wished, the walls could be lowered. Eventually, you would lower them. Not for Loki to leave, but for you to enter.

You sat with your feet lounging on the desk in front of the “cage.” Loki was standing in the middle, watching you. You weren’t going to give him the satisfaction of speaking to him. Hell, you avoided looking at him. 

Hours passed by silently and you left your post. You had the surveillance cameras hooked up to your phone so you could watch him while you were away. You slipped into bed in the room you were assigned and went to sleep, thinking of your plans.

The next morning was just as uneventful as the previous day. It wasn’t until noon that something happened. Instead of standing in the middle of the room, Loki approached the wall nearest you and spoke, “You seem to disdain me more than your fellow Avengers. I don’t recall ever doing anything to you. I would remember seeing such a beautiful face.”

You ignored his comment and turned your face away from his smirking one. You were told he had a knack for getting under peoples’ skin.

“You want to be silent? Very well. I’ll admire you from a distance then.” He returned to the middle of the room but continued to watch you with a thin-lipped smile. Despite yourself, you couldn’t help but wonder if his legs ached from standing so long.

As Loki said, he didn’t bother you for the rest of the week. You kept your mouth shut and tried to avoid his gaze the whole time. There was an incident when you were coming back from getting lunch and happened to glance at him, already looking at you. He seemed to find pleasure in the quick turn of your head when your eyes met. No doubt, just as the other Avengers promised, he was trying to get under your skin. You were used to having people scrutinize your every move, but what Loki was doing felt different. 

To your dismay, when you returned to your desk the following Monday, Loki decided he wanted to bother you.

“It’s terribly lonely in here. Why don’t you join me?” He knew you weren’t going to answer but he still prodded you. “What’s wrong dear? Afraid I bite? I promise it’s only lightly.”

You gave him a cold scowl and returned to the book you were reading.

“You enjoy reading? Do enlighten me on the title,” he asked. Unlike the way he was speaking previously, he seemed genuinely  curious to know. Who knew a god would be interested in books?

Even though you told yourself you wouldn’t utter a word to him, you decided to tell him what you were reading. “Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare.”

He responded only with a hum, as if he was thinking it over. You raised your eyebrows, expecting him to say more about your sudden inclination to speak to him. He didn’t say anything else though, and returned to look into your eyes with a searing intensity.

He remained silent for the duration of the day, which bothered you more than his speaking evidently. You had to admit, sitting there for hours was boring but it would be worth it in the end. 

Another week passed before Loki decided to speak again.

“You dislike talking to me and looking at me.” He said it as if it was a fact. Which it was.

“What did I do to you?” He said this with an earnest tone. He genuinely wanted to know. It was eating at him that such a beautiful creature would feel such hatred towards him.

He let out a sharp sigh and decided to give him what he was searching for. “During your little rampage in New York, you killed my mother. I’m sorry if I don’t act friendly,” you spat.

For a second he looked taken aback. Even though it was only a fraction of a second you caught it. Did he not realize the damage he had caused? Surely he wasn’t that thick-skulled, you thought.

“I apologize, I wasn’t aware.”

“Of course you weren’t. You were too busy trying to take over Earth to take into account that you were killing people,” you scoffed. “And don’t act like you’re sorry. I know you aren’t. You can’t begin to understand the pain I felt and still feel.”

“You would be wrong there, dear. My own mother was killed. It was my fault; a foolish mistake.” He muttered the last sentence and you had to strain to hear it, but you did. You couldn’t help but feel a twinge of… empathy?

“Well I’m sorry. That doesn’t excuse what you did though.” You were sorry. Not that he deserved to hear your apology.

“I did not dare think it would. You should not feel so alone, dear. I share your emptiness.” His words caught you off guard. He was right. A part of you did feel empty. But you weren’t one to admit that you were aching for someone or something to fill that gap. Your mother was your support system and since she died you were alone. You had friends, but none close enough that you would relay so much person information to. People tried to comfort you but at the time nothing made sense. You were a ball of anger and sadness that never got to let go of your grievances. The feelings inside of you never came to the surface, you carried them with you, just for them to haunt you at night.

You didn’t want to say anything back in fear he was still trying to pick you apart and tear you down. “He’s a villain. He’s done terrible things. He killed your mother,” you kept repeating to yourself. You weren’t about to let Loki make you vulnerable. You had a personal mission to carry out and it would get done. You decided to quit talking to him for now on. You couldn’t start being friendly. You especially couldn’t let yourself be attracted to him. That would be your downfall. Although you did feel empathy towards him, you wouldn’t let anything else happen.

“What am I doing?” you thought as you arrived back in your bedroom around a week later. Your mouth didn’t like to listen to your head. You found yourself talking to Loki when he spoke to you. Talking to him. Answering his questions. You promised yourself you would put an end to him soon. If you didn’t want to fall deeper into the trap that is Loki’s charms, you would have to kill him soon. Things had gone too far already. “He is a terrible man,” you reminded yourself once more.

You laid in bed watching the security cameras for hours. You had to wait until him and all the other people in the building were asleep. It was 2 in the morning and Loki had been asleep for hours. Surely, everyone else had been too.

You stalked through the halls silently as you made your way to the “cell.” Sure enough, Loki was asleep in the small bed, laying on his back to your luck. You quickly lowered the electric wall nearest you and walked into the dark room. You pulled out your knife and steadied yourself. Finally, you could have peace. 

You leaned over his body, trying to avoid looking at his peaceful face as you raised the knife to his neck. But you stopped. Could you really do this? Hasn’t he proven that he isn’t so bad? While talking to him the past week, you learned a lot about him. He openly spoke about his home and filled you in on anything you were curious about. “Shit,” you thought. Surely enough he had lured you into his trap. You couldn’t deny the growing affection you felt for him. It doesn’t matter how small the feeling was. You weren’t going to let yourself do this.

As you were thinking a voice spoke behind you, “Are you trying to kill me dear?”

You snapped your head back and saw Loki standing behind you. When you turned to look at what you had previously thought to be Loki, he wasn’t there. The covers were still pristine and in place. 

“It’s alright, darling. I know you were not going to harm me. I saw your hesitation. Something has developed inside you,” he said.

“That’s not why.”

“Then whatever could change your mind? On that first day I could feel your hatred. It slowly dissipated as time passed. When I first laid eyes on you, I was intrigued. You are a passionate creature, driven by whatever your heart desires. Does your heart… desire me?”

Your breath caught in your throat at his sudden proximity. His face was inches from yours and you could feel his soft breath against your ear.

“Do you desire me… as much as I desire you?”

“I- I can’t… This was a mistake. I came in with a mission and it seems that it won’t be fulfilled.” As soon as you were done talking you turned away from him. Parts of you wanted to stay, but you knew you shouldn’t.

“A mistake? I have made many mistakes but wanting you is not one of them, love.” He looked at you with pure desire and truth in his eyes that your knees nearly went weak. Your mind told you that what you were about to do was betrayal, but you ignored it.

In one movement your body was flush against Loki’s. He placed a hand on your cheek and met you halfway, pressing your lips together. The kiss was filled with many unsaid words. It was an apology, a confession, and a thousand struggles shared between you. 

Your hand moved to tangle in his hair, deepening the kiss, if that was possible. His hands traveled to your waist, pulling you against him. You could feel the hardening going on in his pants. He pulled away as if to ask you permission. You took a step backwards and fell onto the bed, laying on your back.

Loki took that as a yes and stripped out of his clothes, leaving you the only one dressed. He climbed on top of you and began to trail kisses from your jaw to your exposed collarbone. You raised your hips to let him pull off your pants and underwear, which were already wet. He chuckled lightly at the sight but continued to undress you, throwing you shirt and bra over his shoulder. Anybody could take a peek at the security cameras and find you two together, naked on his bed.

Loki started slow, teasing your entrance with the tip of his dick before pushing it in the rest of the way. You bit your lip to suppress any noise. He slid in and out of you, picking up the pace as he went. It was becoming more and more difficult to stay quiet. You wanted to moan, say his name, anything to express how he was making you feel.

Loki also seemed to be having trouble staying quiet, breaths ragged with each thrust. He lifted your legs so your ankles were on his shoulders. The thrust he gave after that was enough to make a sound slip from both of you. He groaned and you moaned out his name, “Loki.”

It didn’t take long for you to reach your peak, coming undone as he gave another hard thrust. They soon became sporadic, some slow and some fast, but none at a steady pace. Just moments after you came, so did he, right into you.

He pulled out and rolled to your side, wrapping an arm around you as you both caught your breath. Whatever worries were troubling you were gone from mind as you laid there, mind focused on the man next to you.

[maplecornia]

Chapter 4

𝔴𝔬𝔯𝔡 𝔠𝔬𝔲𝔫𝔱: 3.06K

𝔤𝔢𝔫𝔯𝔢: romance | slice of life | fluff | angst | bts x female!reader | ot7

𝔰𝔲𝔪𝔪𝔞𝔯𝔶: You watched them from the sidelines ever since you were a young teenage girl. Now you’re grown up, they’ve returned after 2 long years and everything has changed. What happens when you pull back the mask and find the darkness within? What happens when you see that they’re broken?

𝔞/𝔫: this one is literally just revolving around one of the BTS members. i don't really have much else to say other than HYUNJIN'S BACK and I'm crying.

𝔴𝔞𝔯𝔫𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔰: cliffhangers | angst | fluff | slight mentions of self hatred | depression | mental health illness | self harm | occurs in the year 2024 | set in a timeline where BTS went to the military together | slight language

tags: @kookaine | @fangirl125reader | @kookiebbyxx | @taradevonne

Kim Namjoon never imagined he would lose his assistant.

JaeJin was a great worker and a great friend. He loved music and expressed it through his very soul, his every move whenever he danced or helped Namjoon produce a song. Namjoon smiles as his hand hovers over the soundboard.

In the back of his mind, he remembers the days spent here ever since Jaejin was promoted to his assistant. He remembers the first time he met his dear friend, how nervous Jaejin looked, unspoken excitement reverberating off of him in waves.

As Namjoon pushes up the volume on the soundboard, he thinks back to the moments spent as Jae learned how to be his assistant, as Namjoon taught him as much as he could. How what started as respect turned into a mutual friendship, and later, a brotherhood.

Though Namjoon is sad to see JaeJin go, he is happy to see his dream accomplished. He will miss Jae's smile, his laugh, and his good heart, but he knows that just because Jaejin is taking a different path doesn't mean they will cease to be friends.

As soon as Joon finishes a part of his song, he sighs, pulling away from the board and whipping out his phone.

He doesn’t know why he started thinking about him all of a sudden, he was one of the first people to know that Jae was leaving. Besides, he would see him soon, it’s not like Jaejin leaving for a couple of months means that he won’t ever see him again.

Standing, RM walks out of the room, leaving Suga to continue by himself.

He's lucky that Yoongi has his headphones on. If he caught Namjoon slacking he wouldn't get off easy. Carefully, RM exits the room, shutting the door softly behind him as he leans against the wall next to the door to the studio. Turning his phone on, he checks the time, his heart thumping slightly.

8:30 am.

Perhaps the reason his mind is so full of nostalgic memories is that he’s been waiting since last night to meet his new manager.

Jaejin said that his replacement should show up around this time, but he hasn't given much information other than that. Namjoon pockets his phone and heads down the hallway towards the front lobby.

Staff members pass by him, some working for TxT, others for the new girl group they put together about 3 years ago, and even more for the new boy group that BigHit began putting together in 2020.

Namjoon finds their presence surreal.

The members of BTS's staff have been around ever since their debut, and even more, have joined the crew over the years. These staff members will no doubt do the same for their groups, maybe stick around till the very end.

If anyone asked Namjoon's opinion, he would say it was the staff that had to do the real work. And all from behind the scenes. They are the ones who help them put on a great show. They are the ones who tutor them, provide for them, allow them to create their vision, their masterpiece. They are the stitches behind the fabric.

To Namjoon, BTS is just the face. The whole idea of them, of their message, was created through everyone's effort. Including ARMY, including their staff, including BTS themselves.

Losing one of their members would be like trying to fill a hole that cannot be filled.

Perhaps that's why Namjoon is so worried about Jaejin's replacement.

No one can truly replace him.

Namjoon never wanted a new manager.

There was a reason he chose Jaejin out of all the others, a reason he turned a backup dancer into his manager. He needs someone with the same passion, the same grit, the same determination that he has. Jaejin had that, and more. He was able to keep up with Namjoon’s crazy schedule, his unhealthy habits, his tendency to overwork himself.

Normally it was Suga trying to keep up with him, trying to help him, trying to do the best for him, but when he met Jaejin, he found exactly what he needed in a manager.

Will his replacement be able to do the same?

Entering the lobby, he knocks on the counter, where a receptionist is taking a call. She looks up at his knock and he smiles at her, receiving the usual smile back and a slight blush on her cheeks.

After a moment of their little staring contest, Namjoon grows impatient. He indicates silently that he’s waiting to speak with her and her eyes widen in realization. She nods sheepishly at his signal, holding up one finger to signify to him that she'll talk to him in a second. He complies, settling in as she continues her call, faintly aware of Kim Namjoon behind her.

Namjoon is never sure how to feel about these types of things.

People recognizing him in the street, others noticing him even with a disguise, he doesn't know what to do with the attention.

Why didn't people pay attention to him before? When he didn't have all the makeup, the money, and the influence? Are they looking at him because they appreciate who he is as a person?

Or because he is Kim Namjoon?

RM of BTS.

Putting the thought out of his mind, he turns his back to the receptionist, unlocking his phone, and opening the chat with Jaejin. He doesn't see any sign of his replacement, but then again, how would Namjoon know what she looks like?

Hey

YOUNG APPRENTICE- oh hi, what’s up hyung?

When was your replacement supposed to be here again?

YOUNG APPRENTICE- ummmmm, 8:00 am or so, why?

RM pulls away from his phone, looking around for any sign of a girl who looks lost or out of place in the lobby. Every time Jaejin talked about this so-called friend, he referred to them as a “she” so the only thing Namjoon knows about this new manager is the fact that she’s female.

Sadly, as he desperately scours the lobby, there's no sign of anyone there that fits the description. The one girl who was waiting in the waiting area has just been called aside and led to a meeting room. Namjoon, a little worried, bites his lip before a buzz in his hands causes him to glance at his phone.

YOUNG APPRENTICE- Namjoon?

Yeah?

I’m sorry it’s just….she’s not here yet

YOUNG APPRENTICE- WHAT

Namjoon rolls his eyes playfully at Jae's reaction before walking out of the lobby. If she's not here, there's no need to hang around, and it doesn't seem as though the receptionist is paying much attention anyway.

As he leaves, the receptionist stares after him almost hopelessly, Namjoon oblivious to the longing gaze.

He glances at his phone once more maneuvering his way through the hallways of the building.

YOUNG APPRENTICE- are you sure?

YOUNG APPRENTICE- I'm gonna murder her

Well I can’t know for sure

Could I have a picture or maybe a name?

YOUNG APPRENTICE- I never gave you one?

Not to my knowledge

YOUNG APPRENTICE- oh I am so sorry hyung! Her name is Lin Yen and just give me a minute and I'll find you a picture

"Lin...Yen...." Namjoon murmurs, pondering it in his mind.

"Just who exactly are you?" he whispers, putting the phone down once more as he comes to a stop in a corner of the hallway.

Yen...he repeats in his mind, playing around with it, trying to see how it sounds on his tongue, how it feels circling in his thoughts, how it plays on his voice.

It's a beautiful name, one he hasn't heard often, and for some reason, he feels as though it's foreign. Another vibration from his phone jolts him out of his pondering thoughts, and he looks down at the screen, immediately bursting out laughing.

Jaejin has sent the picture of you, but it's not just any picture.

It's a picture of you eating salad.

But that's not what makes it so funny.

You and Jaejin are at a Korean BBQ in the picture, and you hold the signature salad bowl up to your face, your chopsticks hooked around an enormous bite. You're shoving the bite into your mouth, your cheeks puffed up like chipmunks, your eyes wide and nose pinched.

Your expression, your face, the fact that you're attempting to shove a huge bite into your mouth, everything about the picture is hilarious, and Namjoon can't stop looking at it.

He can't stop looking at you.

Now he is sure that you are a foreigner, with that complexion and your facial features. You aren't necessarily tall, but not super short either. Then again, Namjoon doesn't think that Park Jimin is short, so what does he know?

One thing is for sure, though…

You are beautiful.

And it’s not only the physical things that make you beautiful, though they are a contributing factor.

It’s the personality.

The charisma that exuberates off of you, managing to touch him most charmingly through a mere photo. The way you smile, how it lights up your eyes. The blush of your cheeks, and even the color of your hair. Everything about you has captured his attention, and he can't look away.

His smile doesn't want to fade, so he covers his face with his hand, leaning against the wall. No doubt he looks like an idiot, but he doesn't care.

You have that gift.

The natural gift of familiarity when you are less than strangers.

And it has surprised him. The cool, calm, professional, wise Namjoon wouldn't have thought that such a thing could reach his heart...and yet he can't stop smiling.

"Namjoon."

Startled, the smile fading just as quickly as it began, Namjoon jumps, his phone slipping out of his grip. Frantic, and a bit embarrassed, he fumbles to catch it before it falls, but to no avail.

He watches in hopeless despair as the phone hits the ground with a sickening thud, the screen immediately cracking at the impact of the harsh tiled floor.

Namjoon lets out a groan, while a slender, pale hand reaches out and picks it up. Wincing, he glances to his side.

Where Min Yoongi holds his phone in between his fingers as though it were a dirty piece of trash; looking unamused. Glaring at him with a stare as cold as ice, he drops it into RM’s hands before folding his arms across his chest. Namjoon rolls his eyes at his luck, sighing inwardly.

He doesn't look too happy.

"Hey, Yoongi, I--"

"Yes, please explain, Kim Namjoon." Yoongi drawls, his voice monotone and sending shivers down Namjoon’s spine. Almost shamefully, Namjoon turns off his phone and slides it back into his pocket, avoiding that icy stare.

"You're supposed to be helping, yet you left for what? To laugh at memes? Now is not the time to be fooling around with Jackson for heaven's sakes!” Though Yoongi doesn’t raise his voice, the severity of his tone is enough to make it seem as though he has and Namjoon has to restrain himself from visibly flinching away from him. After a moment of silence, Suga sighs, rubbing his temple with frustration. “Why are you so distracted today?"

Joon has been asking himself the same question.

"For one thing, they weren't memes and I wasn’t talking to Jackson. It was a picture of Jaejin's replacement. I was trying to see if she's arrived yet." He explains, a bit indignantly, before walking away towards the studio once more, hoping to escape the conversation.

He should have remembered that nothing escapes Yoongi.

"And did she?" Suga follows Namjoon, managing to walk fast enough to catch up with him and yet still look nonchalant and unbothered. RM sighs at the question, speeding up his pace, as he notices the studio door in the distance.

Jumping at the opportunity, Namjoon makes a break for the door, Yoongi calling after him in surprise. He reaches it, leaving Suga behind in the dust. Opening the door he sinks into a chair as though it were a refuge from the uncomfortable situation he found himself in. As Yoongi comes to a stop in front of the door, Namjoon acts as though he were there the entire time.

"Do you need something?" he asks innocently, and Yoongi rolls his eyes, walking in and closing the door behind him before settling into a chair of his own.

"Yes. I need you to focus on this project. This is important, and is nowhere near done if it's going to be our next title track." He murmurs, immediately setting to work, his mouse echoing in the silence. Biting his bottom lip in guilt, RM turns back to his phone, frowning a bit at the sight of the cracked screen.

Yoongi is right, Namjoon knows this.

They dedicated this day to work on BTS’s new title song.

Namjoon especially wanted Yoongi to produce it because of his incredible skill and work ethic. He practically begged him to take time off from his other projects to work on this with him, Yoongi is sacrificing a lot of his time just to be here.

Namjoon knows how important time can be.

It doesn’t help matters considering how this song is so essential to their comeback album. Promotion is still far off, but it doesn't change the circumstances. ARMY waited for them for so long to come back to them, it’s only fair that they give them the most groundbreaking album they can.

But RM can't focus.

And it’s for such a stupid reason.

Just because Jaejin is gone doesn't mean the world will fall apart.

He knows this, it's just...

Namjoon smiles a bit bitterly, turning back to the booth as he resumes his work once more.

"She wasn't there." Suga turns to Namjoon at the sound of his voice. Namjoon notices but doesn't pay any mind, continuing to play with the soundboard, creating his type of spell, his sort of magic. "In response to your question."

Yoongi doesn't respond, waiting for Namjoon to finish. That's the way he is, sometimes RM can’t finish a thought in one sentence and it takes him a moment to piece things together, what with everything else running through that expansive mind of his. Suga knows when to wait, when to stay silent, and allow RM a chance to tell him everything he needs to.

He's no stranger to listening to people, especially when it comes to Namjoon.

Sometimes, Joon just needs to let something out without anyone saying anything, and Yoongi won't say anything unless he feels it's necessary. He’ll listen, and be there for anyone to lean on, able to offer them the emotional support they need to carry on.

"I'm sorry, I guess I'm a little nervous to meet her." After a moment, Yoongi responds to him, his soft voice carrying across the room in a comforting murmur.

"What's the big deal? If she's professional, she'll be perfect. I'm sure there's nothing to be worried about." He reassures him. RM nods, trying to concentrate once more, and put the thought of your arrival to the back of his mind.

Maybe Yoongi is right, maybe there is nothing to be worried about.

However, Namjoon can't help but think that your arrival will change their lives.

And who knows if it'll be for the better?

𝔫𝔬𝔱𝔢: how are you guys liking Jaejin now? lol

chapter 5 here

check the Infinite Stars masterlist for more chapters

check my BTS masterlist for other BTS content

check out my masterlist for other kpop fanfics

[lilibetbombshell]

BOOK REVIEW: "IRON WIDOW" (IRON WIDOW #1)

BY: XIRAN JAY ZHAO

(ARC Edition)

COMING TOMORROW 09.21.2021!!!

RATING: 5/5 STARS

I was so excited when I read the premise for this book. I thought to myself, “Pacific Rim meets The Handmaid’s Tale? I. Am. Here. For. It!”

And then I opened it up and read Xiran Jay Zhao’s author’s notes at the beginning of my ARC edition and my eyes widened in surprise at the actual premise of this wild, raw, untamed beast of a book… because I realized what this book actually is wasn’t something that could be tidied up and slotted neatly into a bookseller’s constricting summary box: it’s Pacific Rim meets The Handmaid’s Tale meets Chinese gongdou dramas meets the real-life Empress Regnant Wu (the only legitimate female sovereign China ever had) reimagined as a teenage peasant-girl (with a thirst for revenge) turned into a mecha-pilot who seethes at the patriarchy and the way in which women are automatically slotted into place from birth and never given any other options in life and decides NOPE.

Throw that all into a bottle, shake it up, open it, and what you get is the best sci-fi book I think I’ve ever read. The best book shock I’ve ever had. The most blood lust I’ve ever tasted. The best war cry I’ve ever heard. The best blood bath I’ve ever read. The biggest rallying call I’ve ever seen. The sweetest apathy that made me come apart at the seams. The most vengeful hatred I’ve witnessed sharpened to a razor’s edge.

I couldn’t stop reading. I ate through my dinner. I noted passage after passage until I was so swept away by it all I started forgetting to take notes because I was sunk too deep into this futuristic, otherworldly China where one teenage girl who has nothing to lose herself but cares fiercely and violently about so many other things, one man who loves her and is open-minded and educated enough to know that the status quo is wrong and is willing to stand beside her no matter what, and another man who never stood a chance in the world they were born in but is sick of the system. Their culture, their whole world, is built on teams of two. But, between these three people who all can see outside this paradigm, they all acknowledge and accept this world and its conventions are not who they are and it is not meant for them. They were not meant to be slotted into tidy little boxes, just like this book was not meant to be summarized into a limited character count.

This book is distributed in part by Penguin Teen, but I’m telling you: if you think this is just some YA sci-fi book, you’re abso-friggin-lutely wrong. This book is one of those books you NEED to read. It’s an IMPORTANT book. I won’t lie: It’s target audience is very obviously women in their teens and twenties, but I highly encourage women of all ages and ESPECIALLY men to read this book. Listen to the testimony of this book. Listen to its voice. Its pain. Its drive. Its passion. Its motivation. Its anger. Its thirst. Really listen to it and maybe you’ll learn some things about women you never understood before; because, believe me, I felt completely in sync with Wu Zetian every step of the way through this book.

The action scenes in this book are written beautifully and brutally at the same time. The plot is gracefully and carefully mapped out. The science is explained and makes sense when mixed in with the traditional Chinese beliefs regarding qi. The writing is impassioned, driven, and as impactful as the message of the book.

Wu Zetian’s voice, as a character, is probably the best I’ve read in years. She rings clear as a bell and as blunt as a sledgehammer, which is something so refreshing I wanted to jump in the book and volunteer to be her PA because I appreciate people who tell it like it is (and if you don’t like it too bad). Yizhi is a well-educated, strategic, well-connected, rich, sweet, badass cinnamon roll… and his love and dedication for Wu Zetian really threads through this whole book and helps quilt it together. Li Shimin is… a beautiful tragedy. Born into a world that he never stood a chance in and slotted into a system that was always going to work against him, his story is heartbreaking, but the way in which Wu Zetian and he grow to care for one another and take a stand together is glorious. And their partnership with Yizhi shows that a triangle is definitely the stronger shape.

This book does end on a cliffhanger, being as it is the first in a series, but it’s not a cliffhanger without a purpose. That’s all I can say.

In the end, what I will say is this: When I finished this book, it was midnight here in California. All over America, women are fighting for their reproductive rights because men still think they have a say in what we do with our bodies. In Afghanistan, females are back to being banned from receiving an education once more because men say so. In some parts of the world, girls too young to read this book (and some that would never be allowed to anyway) are being slotted into the places they’ll be expected to stay in for the rest of their lives because men say so. When I finished this book, somewhere in the world there was likely another child bride being taken because men say so. And I was FURIOUS. This book made me want to go out and smash the patriarchy, because Wu Zetian is right: no more.

[bthump]

I wanted to touch on the whole gutsca thing with someone (I know zero people in this fandom so you're my lucky pick!). Am I alone in feeling like their first time together came out of no where? My meta with Guts is that he was not at all comfortable with sex at that time of his life (this instance being his first time [outside of the rape he experienced as a child]). His choice of words too, "here I go", translated to me like someone only doing what they felt was expected of them rather than something he was yearning for. He clearly wasn't even ready given how rough he was and how he regressed and attacked her. This moment seemed very forced and almost rang to me like Kentaro's declaration of "no homo though". I would be curious to know how Kentaro felt about homosexuality (bisexuality, etc) and if he ever addressed the ever blatant gay tension and romantic-non-platonic-love blossoming between Guts and Griffith pre-eclipse. I do get the sense that this may be a case of severe queer baiting or perhaps a PSA against gay love altogether ("falling for a man will literally destroy you and send you and everyone you love to hell" type of message); but I'm a very jaded person so I hope to be proven wrong. Sigh, my point being Gutsca seems pretty dang forced and empty of true development. I buy them more as besties than anything romantic. Especially since both he and Casca are actually in love with Griffith (what a fucking triangle!). Does anyone in fandom have any opinions on the sad possibility of this whole beautiful and ultimately tragic love between Griffith and Guts actually being a fucked up anti-gay PSA? Are there any interviews with Kentaro shooting this theory down so I can stop being sad and bitter about it? What are your thoughts?

Thanks for sending this, I'm definitely down to talk about it! I hope you connect with more people in the fandom but don’t worry about sending random asks even if you do lol.

Anyway you’re definitely not alone. I have a lot of thoughts on Guts and Casca's hook up, and they're all pretty much "it feels really forced and not particularly romantic but I think you can argue that that's deliberate" lol. For instance I discuss in a lot of detail here how various aspects of the scene indicate that Guts and Casca having sex is shown to be a case of both of them rebounding from Griffith and sort of giving to each other what they were unable or failed to give to him.

And I talk a lot about how Judeau essentially orchestrates it all and what that suggests about Guts and Casca's relationship here.

And lol sorry for all the links but also this post is about how their relationship feels one-sided to an extent and is used to illuminate a lot of Guts' flaws, using Judeau as a comparison point.

Oh shit and also one more lol, here's a comparison between the sex scene and Griffith's with Charlotte that suggests that both start as ways for the dudes to repress their feelings.

(Don't feel obligated to read all those posts if you don't want, you should get the gist of what I'm saying w/ those descriptions.)

But yeah basically I do think that Guts and Casca getting together felt forced and awkward. At best it might be intended to be seen that way, as two friends hooking up awkwardly in an emotionally intense moment but probably doomed to failure because neither of them are ready for a relationship with the other, or particularly interested in one deep down, once they finished "licking wounds." At worst it’s just bad writing lol. But again like I think there are good arguments for the former.

I also totally agree that their relationship has a strong vibe of doing what's expected. Like for real, at least to me both Guts and Casca read so easily as gay and repressed lol. Casca talks about her feelings for Griffith in terms of “he was a boy she was a girl can I make it any more obvious”

and I can’t help but see it as Casca like, wow I have strong feelings towards Griffith, he’s a man and I’m a woman, so clearly these feelings must be romantic, there’s no other option. Then when she has sex with Guts she keeps contextualizing it essentially as repayment for Guts saving her, like she owes him. “I too want a wound I can say you gave me.” “Not just being given to... maybe I can give something as well.” Which just doesn’t make her desire for him look all that genuine lol.

And then you have Guts. The way he tells Casca that from the start only her touch was okay with him after he has sex with her, referencing the scene when he wakes up with her on top of him and starts to panic before realizing she’s a woman, is soooo suggestive of repression to me. Like, first off because it’s incorrect, he was also okay with Griffith going in for a face-grab after winning a duel Guts had been projecting his rape trauma all over, which seems like a pretty conspicuous omission. And secondly because the reason he was okay with Casca’s touch specifically is solely because she’s a woman, not because she’s special or because they have a magic romantic connection - it’s because she’s not a man. To me that just screams that Guts was open to sex with Casca because she’s the only woman he knows, and he’s afraid of the idea of physical intimacy with men, regardless of what he might actually want deep down.

So yeah that’s basically how I feel about Guts and Casca’s relationship, strong agree with you.

When it comes to Miura’s intent, I can tell you that Miura was asked about the subtext in an interview once, back in 2000, and he responded with something along the lines of ‘two men can have passionate feelings for each other without it being romantic.’ The interview is here, but this is a paraphrase the translator mentioned in the comments.

Other than that I’ve never seen him address it directly, but on the flipside he has cited several textually gay stories as inspiration (off the top of my head: Kaze to Ki no Uta, Devilman, Guin Saga, mangaka Moto Hagio in general), and he has straightforwardly said that the (magical intersex) central character of his other work, Duranki, was intended to have romances with both male and female love interests. Also people tell me there are strong griffguts vibes with the main, presumably canon or intended-to-be-canon ship there. So there’s that lol.

As for the no homo aspect and the potential homophobia in the griffguts subtext... I can’t deny I’ve also considered the idea that it’s a deliberate anti-gay PSA (though I haven’t seen anyone else address the idea as far as I remember, and I’ve only briefly mentioned it offhandedly). Like, Guts and Griffith’s relationship turns bad because they’re both too invested in each other, maybe the barely-subtextual desire is meant to look like a sinister twisting of pure platonic feelings that ruins everything, if Griffith hadn’t loved him the Eclipse never would have happened, etc.

But honestly I don’t think that reading holds up compared to a much more positive reading of their feelings, in which it’s their failure to understand them and act on them, thanks largely to formative childhood trauma and self-hatred, that leads to tragedy.

I don’t know what Miura intended, and there certainly are aspects of the story that are homophobic regardless of his intent, even if my best-faith reading is entirely correct, like the only textual gay attraction being pedophiles and over the top heretic orgies lol, or yk, Guts and Griffith both assaulting the same woman while looking at/thinking about the other in a very sexually charged way.

But the reading of their relationship where it’s positive and good for both of them, even including sexual desire, and only gets fucked up because they both incorrectly think their feelings are unrequited is legitimately so weirdly strong, much stronger than a reading where the sexual nature of their feelings is what fucks everything up, so I’m pretty happy just rolling with that take.

And as much as Casca can be seen and may very well be intended as a no homo, it’s also very easy for me to read her relationships with both as less of a hopeful opportunity for positive heterosexual romance and more of a “here’s how repressing your feelings thru attempts at heterosexuality fucks you up” PSA lol. Griffith and Charlotte too, for that matter. It’s definitely a stretch to think that’s intended, but whether it’s intended or not it’s an easy sell for me and I’m fine with not really worrying too much about possible authorial intent there.

Finally, I also want to link this post that goes pretty thoroughly into why I interpret griffguts as very positive rather than as a cautionary tale or predatory gay lust etc

And also have this shorter post about Femto on the same subject too, why not

Oh and maybe this thing where I split hairs about Guts’ lust for Griffith and desire for revenge to make a point that the homoeroticism isn’t necessarily being equated with violence by the narrative lol

[ithehellisbucky]

Fake Smile

Carol Danvers x Reader

Request: for @marvels-writings

Word Count: 2.5k

Warnings: Hatred, grief, suicide, etc

Author's Note: This is for @marvelxreaderfanfictionfest's contest last year, it's already on ao3 here. They have a great contest opening on may tenth for the mcu ladies, so go check that out! There isn't enough wlw fanfiction in this fandom (or really any).

~

You could swear her skin was glowing. Or at the very least reflecting the colors around her. Soft golden light shone around onto her face from the cracked window next to her chair, and she basked in the light as if she had just won every award the world had to offer. She didn't have the right to be this fucking pretty.

Her golden hair floated around her head, almost literally, forming a halo that made her look even more like an angel. Her skin was only several shades lighter, and her cheeks scrunched up in a way when she laughed that you could only describe as euphoric. Her piercing blue eyes only complimented her features, and your eyes were instantly drawn to her impossible beautiful cheekbones.

If only the woman below that was as beautiful as the face it belonged to.

Carol was the enemy. Not literally, of course. But she was the enemy. Utterly unsympathetic when you had told her about the death of your best friend in the dusting, you had grown to despise her within mere minutes of a word coming out of her mouth.

She laughed like she didn't notice you glaring. And when she finally locked eyes with you, her lips formed a smirk and kept on giggling.

In the brief days that she had returned to earth, she made it her mission to do everything for the sole purpose of lighting rage inside your chest. No one had the right to make you feel this way, least of all her.

She had returned to earth to "check-in." In the past 3 years since the snap, the world had taken a turn for the worst. Not only was every other person gone, but the death toll was slowly rising. Crime rates were increasing, and the suicide toll was only getting higher.

Every single damn day of your life you had dedicated yourself to helping the people on earth, and the only thing she had on her mind was the big picture. Trying to bring people back that couldn't be brought back. Bullshit.

All you were trying to do was make sure that the people who had left stayed alive.

"Ava? Would you like a scone." She said it in a normal voice, but you could feel the passion behind the words.

"No thank you. I'm careful about what I let others feed me. Because I'm careful. Unlike some other people I know." You say in the most passive and sickly sweet voice you could muster.

"I'm very cautious about keeping myself, and others, safe. I'm just nice enough to do it politely." She responded in the same voice as before.

"Carol, Ava. Do I need to remind you that this is a professional meeting, where we are to talk about important topics only." Nat said in a stone-cold tone. Natasha was never the most playful person, to begin with, but in the past 3 years, things had taken a turn for the worse.

When someone is already flying by the seat of their pants and is about as stable as a bull in a china shop, you tend not to provoke them. And by provoke, I mean of course murdering half of humanity.

"I was being professionally, just Carol here was-"

Natasha sharply cuts you off. " Ava. "

"Fine." You say, internally rolling your eyes.

Carol looks you dead in the eyes and gives you a smirk. Damn this woman.

You had been through hell. You had talking people of bridges, you had stood up for abuse victims in court, you had watched the people you had loved die. You were a stone-cold bitch. But with Carol, you might as well be a 2-year-old with a pair of scissors and a disturbing lack of adult supervision.

Once the meeting was over, you sparked a conversation with Natasha. "Hey Nat, do you wanna get some lunch?"

She looked at you, and then down at her phone, and then at you again. "Um, I can't. Not today." She looks behind her shoulder, and a sinister smirk creeps onto her features. "But I'm sure Carol would love to go out with you."

"Natasha, no. I said no."

Her menacing grin only intensifies. "Oh come on Ava, you could cut the sexual tension between the two of you with a knife."

"It's not sexual tension. It's just tension. Because we hate each other."

"Mm, I don't think so." She turns over her shoulder and calls to the blonde. "Carol, could you come here for a sec?"

Carol's head perks up, and she walks towards Nat, a scowl forming on her face when she sees that you're next to her. "What is it?"

"Do you want to go to lunch. Will Ava and I?" She questions politely.

"That sounds great, but doesn't Ava have to do that... Thing?"

You turn on your sickly sweet smile for what seems like the ten-thousandth time. "No, I canceled it. Just. To. Have. Lunch. With. You."

Natasha is almost guffawing at this interaction between the two of you. "Alright then, lunch it is!" She starts walking right without any hesitation, and both you and Carol have to run to catch up to her.

"I saw this cute little Italian place. Do you want to go-"

"Chili's." Natasha stops her pace and looks back at you.

"What. It's an incredible experience that I'm sure we'll all enjoy."

It's now Natasha's turn to wear the fake smile. "Great."

You reach Natasha's car, and she quickly whips out her car keys.

"Oh, we're riding together?" Carol exclaims with disgust.

"Yeah, saves energy," Natasha exclaims as she checks her phone.

"I call shotgun!" You counter, trying to do anything to get away from Carol.

"No shotgun. I think it would be nice for the two of you to bond. I wish it was in a bedroom, but a car will do." Natasha says, still looking down at her phone.

"What was that?" You asked, hoping that you didn't hear what you thought you heard.

"No shotgun, window's broken." She replies, opening the door.

You and Carol squeeze into the back seat. It wasn't a tight fit, by any means; but anywhere that isn't 50 feet apart from her is hell on earth. How was she so fucking pretty.

Every time your skin brushed together you shot up as if you had just touched a shock wire. The glares passed between the two of you could freeze even the darkest parts of hell.

As you were getting out of the car, you slammed the door in Carol's face. She opening it, and it was obvious she was pissed.

"Oh come on, you're a fucking superhero, if you're afraid of a car door then you're in the wrong line of work."

She doesn't respond to you and instead flashes you one of her infamous fake smiles.

The Chili's is cozy, with only 15 or so booths, less than 5 of them preoccupied. The hostess kindly led you to a booth, in the corner of the room. You slide into the booth first, and your shoulder pushed against the plastic wallpaper when you moved into your seat.

Carol takes her position in the seat in front of you. Natasha doesn't sit down.

She makes deadly eye contact with you as she pulls her phone out from inside her pocket. "Oh look, I just got a text message." She exclaims, not breaking eye contact.

Natasha quickly flashes you the screen of her phone, showing that in fact, she had not gotten a message. "I have to go. Emergency."

"Are you sure." You say, yet again feigning a smile.

"I'm positive, there's an emergency at work."

Carol attempts to get up and join Natasha before Nat gives Carol a disapproving glance.

"There's always going to be an emergency, but there isn't always going to be lunch." You say, cocking your head and putting on a smirk.

"No," Natasha says. And smiles at the two of you. "Have fun."

You flip her the bird, and without even turning around she returns the favor.

"This is going to be fine." You say.

"Yep," Carol responds, popping the p.

The two of you study the menu for a couple more minutes.

You begin to notice that whenever you adjust yourself Carol does the same, and you do as well, subconsciously.

The waitress walks up to you and politely introduces herself. She asked you what you wanted and, without skipping a beat, you ordered yourself the best thing on the menu, and Carol the worst. She looked as if she was going to protest, but at that point, the waitress had walked away. And all you did was sit there and smirk.

The tension in the room was not sexual. The hatred you felt in your heart for her and the simultaneous need to kiss her and have her kiss you back was not sexual, in any way shape or form.

"So." You promptly exclaimed, in the most positive voice that you could muster.

"Yes," Carol responded, deadlocking her eyes onto yours.

The longer you stared into her eyes the more love you felt. You lost yourself in the depths of her eyes as if you were Alice just entering wonderland. The smile lines surrounding her lips were faded and it seemed as if she hadn't cracked a grin in decades. Her fair hair fell into her eyes, and she quickly brushed it out of the way with one unmanicured finger.

"Why the fuck are we doing this?" She asks, avoiding your gaze.

"What do you mean?" You counter, plastering on another one of your on-brand fake smiles.

"Forcing ourselves to sit in this hell-ish place just for the courtesy of Natasha."

You tilt your head slightly and regain eye contact, "oh, so you want to leave?" You politely ask, knowing all to well the stir that you would get from Nat if you left now.

"No, of course not." She said, rolling her eyes. "But, why would she ever think that I would ever want to be around you for longer than the 5 seconds that are already peeling off my eyes."

"It's nice to see how kind you are to the people around you." You respond, attempting to be as harmful as she was even though you were internally hurt.

"But now that you mention it, I'm realizing how shitty it is that I have to engage in conversation with someone as horrible as you." You winced, and you were positive that she didn't notice either, because she was doing the same.

"What are your powers then, fixing computers?" She mocked you with a smile "oh, the world is ending. Look, someone to get rid of a faulty line on my phone."

"Oh yeah, I forgot that you were a dinosaur. I'm sorry, we don't use phones bolted to the wall in national security." You exclaimed. You wouldn't usually be so harsh, but her words were causing you to lash out.

"At least I can hold up in a fistfight." She said, putting on another mask of a hollow smile.

"I can hold up in a fistfight just fine, but can you hold up with a speakerphone button on an iPhone?" Ah yes, another hollow shot at her prehistoric days.

"You know, for someone how talks all this talk, I'm shocked that you can't actually do anything. Oh wait, I'm not. Sorry, Princess, you're all bark and no bite."

"Excuse me, I forget I was talking to someone who flies around in a space-suit and mohawk." Yet again another fake smile.

The two of you continued to bicker for another few minutes until the waitress comes over with your food.

"I can't believe that you would do such an ignorant f-"

"Hi, I have your food." A woman with a positive attitude and a braid crown places your meals in front of you.

You quickly stopped your argument and the both of you put on yet another fake smile to make it seem like you weren't two seconds away from causing an avengers level threat.

"Thank you so much."

"Really, we really appreciate it."

The second the woman walked away you were back at each other's throats.

But, somehow, Carol was still gorgeous all the while she was yelling at you and eating a shrimp on top of a salad drenched in vinegar.

"Seriously, you're so incompetent." You quickly burst out when she notices you staring.

"Maybe you wouldn't worry so much about me if you were actually doing your job." She responds, rolling her eyes.

"I am sweetie; I'm just good enough at it to be able to pay attention to your uselessness."

"You're too kind." She exclaims as she reaches for a napkin that you quickly pull away from her.

"What I find especially depressing about you is that you will never grow. You're the same person. You're stuck in a box. You will never be better than what you are now. And what you are is shitty." She looks up at you, " Princess ."

You pull back from your meal in shock. You couldn't believe that she had said something like that to you. It pointed out everything you had ever worried about yourself.

"I can't believe you. Why are you so relentlessly horrible to me? What have I done to you? I get when you take cheap shots. I take cheap shots all the time. I don't hate you. Why do you hate me?! I don't hate you! I love you!"

Carol freezes up. Everyone in Chili's looks at you. You were screaming. And you had just told Carol you loved her. You told her you loved her.  You loved her.

"What?" She says in a meek voice.

"I'm so sorry Carol, I was just-" She kisses you.

Carol kisses you.

Carol puts her lips on yours and kisses you.

And you kiss you back.

She's leaning over the table and knocked both your plates off the table and knocked you drinks over. You feel the liquid on your knees as you climb onto the table and place yourself on top of it. You kiss and you kiss until the rest of the world is null and void.

You only pull away for air, and when you're doing so Carol whispers a careful "I'm sorry."

You keep on kissing and kissing.

"I love you, I love you, I'm sorry, I love you." Muttered between you.

You finally pull away and stare into each other's eyes for a minute, basking in the beauty of her blue orbs.

"I feel god in this Chili's tonight." You breathlessly exclaim.

She laughs a beautiful, glorious laugh, and then leans in to kiss you again.

~Requests are open~

New fics out most Saturdays (check on Masterlist or bio in case the day changes) 💜💜💜💜

~Taglists are open~

Permanent Tags: @natasha-danvers​

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[gyllenhaalstories]

SOUTHPAW, PART 1: HEADCANONS.

notes: dear anon: thank you for making me appreciate jake the rapper! also i know nothing about rap, so i’m sorry if this is pure trash! i never finished watching southpaw because it was too dark for me, but i took some very loose inspiration from it. warnings: mentions of dark past, mentions of sexual content... this got really long (2k words). gifs credits: alphalewolf. extras: if you want more informations about rapper!jake, please scroll through my blog. i have edited some older posts with the tag: topic: rapper!jake, so check it out if you’re interested. i have taken some ideas and put them in this list. (at the end of the list i provided some goodies!)

PART TWO WILL BE UPLOADED SOON, KEEP AN EYE OUT FOR IT!

attention, attention! please note i know absolutely nothing about rap. i very rarely enjoy listening to rap music, it’s simply not for me. this might be inaccurate and off compared to the actual world of hip hop and other similar genres. i apologize for my lack of knowledge! this is an au in which jake is not an actor or a producer or anything of the sort. his fame, he built it with his music. you must keep that in mind while reading these headcanons or else it will get confusing. also, i’ve taken some loose inspiration from jake’s actual work, but that’s just for the sake of backstory. are you ready to dive in this twisted fantasy?

Jake Gyllenhaal. Known as Hall. He exploded the charts after being picked up by one of the biggest record companies for his first album: Hall of Fame. He was a rookie, yet he was older than most of the rappers you can think of today. He worked his way up undercover. He started participating in poetry and slam nights at local cafés. He became a songwriter, through connections. He sold some songs that are absolute classics today, but he does not care. He did not feel like they fit him anyway.

Growing up, Jake had it rough. There was a lot of fighting at home. His older sister was the perfect angel and him? The absolute disaster child. It was not like he ran after danger and trouble, he seemed to always be at the wrong place in the wrong time, he hung out with the wrong crowd. He managed to avoid juvie on some miracle. What was the miracle, you might ask? He was caught robbing some local bank with his “friends” and the cops, at first, did not believe he was innocent. While his friends were screaming and threatening the innocent clients of the bank, Jake actually tried to help them out of the building safely. The cops arrived at the same moment and thought he was keeping the strangers hostage. He was arrested on the spot. The other guys played the victims, blamed it all on Jake but it was only when Jake wrote the whole story, from the beginning where his friends manipulated him and made of him their puppet to when he felt this adrenaline rush telling him he needed to save the strangers that night. His writing was too sincere, too raw to be a web of lies. The police released him, but they kept an eye on him.

His escape were writing and music. He impressed all of his teachers at school. Talented, gifted, magical. That was how they described Jake at every parent and teacher meeting. Writing dumb sentences that made very little sense and playing with a guitar after school, that did not make his parents very proud compared to his sister who was on top of all of her classes and working hard for a future of wealth and success.

Music was his entire life. He would come home from school and blast music until he was called out for dinner. Led Zeppelin, Aerosmith, Black Sabbath, Heart, Pink Floyd, Metallica, name it. He liked it loud. He liked it weird. He liked it with a deeper message, with double meaning.

He worked all types of jobs, some legal and some not so much. He was saving money for college. He applied. He got in. He started his classes. He had big dreams, too, he had ambitions. Maybe he could his talent to good use? He wanted to study philosophy, literature, music, creative writing... Anything that required thought and depth. He made friends, there. He befriended the edgy punk guy, he had tattoos everywhere, he listened to the same bands, he was quiet but his essays spoke volumes.

Jake was disappointed, his illusions were broken. He hated the format of his classes, the feeling like his opinion and his inspiration did not matter, it was always about meeting some stupid requirements to please a rich professor who did not care about passion, about talent, about originality. Jake dropped out, soon followed by his friend. His friend was hired at a tattoo parlor and Jake hung out there all the time. He would stay up until 5 am, 6, 7, all night and all day long. He loved the clients there. He would write and read his writing out loud to the clients when they were tortured by the needle shooting the ink in their skin. Talented and gifted, they all the same thing.

He started to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

He wrote, not just stories and opinion pieces. He started writing songs, melody and lyrics. He started playing them, he started writing his own poetry too. He was introduced to freestyle battles. And as he fought against other talented thinkers, he noticed he spoke with a tempo, with a rhythm. He was rapping and he did not even realize it.

His career sky rocketed from the moment a music producer attended one of the rap battles. He was famous, he got quite the thick wallet and the connections. Jake was introduced to legends of hip hop. They all influenced him as his career grew to become something overwhelming and terrifying, yet thrilling and addictive.

Hall had a style of his own, though. It was romantic, yet absolutely disgusting and dark. It was aggressive, yet vulnerable and philosophical. He spoke of his trauma, of his hatred, of his envy, of his fears... He used his songs as an escape. He was becoming his own escape.

And his own prison. His family did not care about him, he was a shame, even. Aside from his old college friend, he never built strong friendships. They were all after him for fame and cash. He slept around, guys and gals, threesomes, foursomes... He did not care, anything for some genuine connection, even if it lasted for a very lazy and messy fifteen minutes in the trashy bathroom of a concert hall. Rumour had it he was a great lover, but he was so bad at loving.

Now it gets interesting...

Hall rapped alongsides Eminem, Drake, Kendrick Lamar, Travis Scott... The biggest pop stars were fighting just to get him to rap a line in their songs. Rihanna wishes he was the one singing Love the way you lie, does that give you an idea? He appeared on duets. He wrote more solo albums, sold them instantly. He never left the top of the billboard in weeks, months, if not years. It never really got to his head. He was still that sensitive boy writing about knights and princesses in his bedroom with walls covered by band posters. Fans did not care about this side of him, they loved him for his lyrics about snorting coke, drinking his pain away and fucking whoever wore the tiniest skirt around.

His latest album, Southpaw, was an even bigger hit. Pure filth. Pure gold. Imagine 13 tracks, Cardi’s and Megan’s WAP but reversed. He does not rap about how good he fucks people. He raps about how good they feel. That’s some real depth here, no pun intended.

You met him at one of his concerts. Your friend won VIP passes, so you were standing in the front and got to take a picture with him. You did not understand the hype around taking a photo with this guy, he just stood there and looked absolutely emotionless.

You hated rap, or perhaps you loved it. You did not care much for Jake, that was for sure. You thought he was just another lame rapper who thought he was the real deal because his lyrics were so explicit, even the clean versions made angels cry. The truth was, you did not know much a bout him. You found him too commercial, like he was scared of becoming irrelevant.

You saw right through him already.

But him? He already cared too much about you. You caught his attention as he rapped his songs. He could not take his eyes off you. You weighted heavy on his mind, caused him to stutter and forget lyricvs. Fans laughed, they said he was probably too drunk or too high too focus. Drunk in love, that’s what it was.

There was something about you. Maybe it was the Black Sabbath shirt you wore. Maybe it was the unimpressed look on your face. Maybe it was your plump lips he wanted to kiss. Maybe it was the sight of you laughing with your friend that made his heart skip a beat. Maybe it was the fact you treated him like a normal person even if you had not spoken to him first.

So, you met backstage.

Your friend was beaming from ear to ear, showering Jake in compliments.

“Did you enjoy the show?” Jake asked you.

“For someone who shows no emotion, sound dead inside and look like they wish they were doing anything but making dozens of thousands of dollars by singing a couple of semi mediocre tracks, yeah, it was not that horrible.”

He was up for a challenge.

You two exchanged insults like it was a boxing match. Each round was getting more and more intense. It was no longer insults, it was straight up flirting. You noticed when your bodies were so close you could smell the scent of watermelon chewing gum that escaped from his warm breath. You could hear the way his raced even faster than yours.

You were snapped out of this fantasy by his bodyguard, indicating other fans waited for him.

He remembered the name your friend called out, saying he needed to bring you home before something bad happened.

It was the most beautiful name he had ever heard.

He hung out around that concert hall for the next couple of days. At the bar nearby, at Starbucks, at McDonald’s, anything for the sake of seeing your face again.

And he did.

You were walking out of the record store with a vinyl of Heart squeezed under your arm. You looked so happy. You had paint stains all over your clothes. You were erasing the memories of a terrible relationship by decorating your tiny apartment, and you needed to set the right ambiance. You needed guidance, you found it in the strong minds of the ladies behind Heart, in Joan Jett, in Stevie Nicks. You found your silver lining in music.

Jake ran behind you, he pretended he was out jogging and he mysteriously bumped into you. He grabbed your vinyl before it could fall on the ground.

“Nice pick.”

“We finally agree on something.”

Another round of flirty insults...

... That ended in the two of you fucking like animals on the floor of your apartment.

And fucking on the couch the next day.

On the kitchen counter the morning after.

And finally, on the bed. That was a really special one. Jake was the first person to be on your bed since the departure of your ex. He could feel that you were not in the mood for a rough battle for dominance.

That night, he made love to you.

For, quite possibly, the first time in his life, he expressed his love directly to somebody. “Princess, baby girl, beautiful, gorgeous, amazing”, he showered you in compliments, and praises. The slow movement of his hips, the intense passion in his eyes and love in his heart spoke louder than the music you were playing in the background to set the mood.

You were not just another trophee to hang on the wall. You were special.

He was special too.

He bought you every record that reminded him of you. He bought you collector items of your favourite bands. From the silliest decoration to a new car to replace your crappy one, passing by tickets to exclusive and sold-out shows, Jake had never felt more famous in his life than when he was with you.

His fans noticed the change in his songs, in his lyrics. They were just as explicit, just as rotten and just as corrupted. However, they came from a place of light and love, not of darkness and rage.

He sang about how good your felt when you climaxed around him. How drenched he was whenever he made you squirt. How he loved to taste himnself on your lips. How he was full of love and of lust for you. How he would quit everything if it meant he would live a normal life, for once, and with you.

You inspired so many songs that became massive world-wide hits.

You travelled the world with him on tour. You helped him design his new merch and you wore his t-shirts with pride. You attended concerts in your freetime. You loved staying up all night, painting and drawing while he was writing about this mirage of a goddess, blessing his existence with a smile and a sparkle in her eyes.

He was addicted to you.

He was crazy for you.

And he went crazy on you.

for research purposes and not because i wasted my time hearing eminem talk about stuff i don’t understand so i could stare at jake’s thighs

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mP_cKP4OjsA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=whV5oQDvVWE

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UGqC9URTJIQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5imXD1LPnwo

and finally, for good measure :

@gyll-yee-haw​ ily

[words-for-holland]

Happier (9) | T.H

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Summary: Y/N & Tom seem to be in the process of rebuilding their relationship. Natalie is up to no good. How much more can Y/N & Tom take?

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10

Masterlist

A/N: Ive been reading all your responses lately and I appreciate them so much! Im so glad you’re all still on this crazy dramatic ride! Thank you so much for reading and supporting!

Spontaneity

There are certain moments in your life where things go according to plan, and others when they dont...but those are the best kinds. The moments that happen because it feels right and everything just falls into place. After all, everything happens for a reason.

It had been three weeks since Tom and Y/N had their heart to heart, promising to find Unknown together along with Harrison and Harry. While there were no threats taking place, one could never be too careful. The more they waited, the more vulnerable they became, letting down their guard ever so slightly.

Everyone kept a close eye on Natalie, but she convinced them enough to think she was on their side and the PR had nothing to do with Unknown. Show the boys one made up threat message from Unknown and you gained most of their trust. Tom had asked Natalie to stop the PR for the sake of mending his broken relationship with Y/N. She told him that her and her publicist agreed to put it on hold...but kept no promise of stopping it forever.

Natalie’s mother was getting furious, not happy with how her daughter handled the situation. “I told you to keep Y/N away, you insolent girl. You are ruining everything and your chance with Tom.”, she spat through the phone.

Natalie listened to her mother’s rant, rolling her eyes. “Relax mother.” She says sourily. “This is just the beginning. Y/N wont know what hit her and after this...She’s going to wish she never came back to London.” She hangs up the phone smirking as she goes through fan accounts that continued to spark the PR flame.

Meanwhile as the three weeks passed Tom & Y/N had slowly rebuilt their relationship. Occasional glances and banters left their tongue, subtle compliments were thrown out, and it almost seemed as if things would be back just the way they were. Even more so, one day in the kitchen. Y/N was making dinner the for the group as she took the time to cut the asparagus and broccoli. Tom passed by her, as he saw her lose herself in the soft music playing in the background, singing to herself all while still being focused on the food.

He leaned against the doorway and continued to observe her, admiring how cute she looked with her hair up and how sweet her voice sounded with the music. It almost made him think why she didn’t pursue a career in music instead of business. “Wow.” Tom muttered under his breath.

His voice must have been too loud, since Y/N looked up startled, but all the more happy to see the man she once loved..and still does deep down. “Oh..I didn’t see you there.” She giggles. “Don’t worry I’ll stop singing in the kitchen. I know how you guys are when I get into it.”

Tom quickly shook his head as he came closer to her, smiling back. “No. You don’t have to. I think your voice sounds lovely. I mean the kitchen’s got great acoustics.” He laughs nervously. Tom can’t remember the last time he felt so nervous with her, but in the good type of nervous. The type of feeling, one gets when they’re in front of their crush and all the butterlies in their stomach start fluttering. “You just sound and look so beautiful.” He admits, sheepishly.

“Thomas Stanley Holland are you trying to flirt with me?” She asks amused at his attempt pointing the knife at him from a safe distance.

“Am not.” He dramatically answers. “I can’t compliment a friend, who happens to be really beautiful.” Y/N shies away hiding her face, by looking down at the cutting board. “I mean it. I really do think you’re beautiful, even if you dont think like that.”

“Well..I’m definitely no model or Natalie, since the people say you both are London’s to die for couple.” She says bitterly.

Tom rolls his eyes as he takes her hand. “Hey..I told you we stopped it for now and Natalie agreed. You know, I get that we all have our suspicions of her after everything, but she said and proved she was a victim herself. Plus Unknown’s been quiet for the past three weeks.” Y/N scoffs at his defense for Natalie as she heads to the stove with Tom following right behind her. He taps on her should as she reluctantly turns to look at him. “I am only ever going to have feelings for you.” Tom confesses. In this moment their faces are inches apart, eyes are slowing moving down to their lips and back up to their eyes, breaths slowing, and just when it seemed like everything would fall into place, both quickly turn away clearing their throats

Y/N calms her heartbeat as she stirs the pasta while Tom helps stir the sauce. The room was quiet only the sound of bubbling from the pots filling the room. It only took five seconds before they both turned back to each other quickly connecting their lips. The fever and the passion increasing rapidly with every touch and pull. The warmth coming from their breaths and the tingling feeling everytime their lips touched. It was like coming back from an addicition you had quit for so long but craved every single time. They couldn’t stop no matter how wrong this was right now, but it felt so right so spontaneous, so in the moment.

Tom quickly signaled her to jump and did as she told, wrapping her legs around his toned torso, cupping her hands under his jaw. He pushed her back against the kitchen wall, as he slow let on of his hands linger under her shirt. It may have been months apart, but both knew exactly what the other needed and how to handle it. Almost as if it were instinctive. They were in complete bliss, forgetting the world around them. Until, the pasta water started overflowing on the stove.

Y/N opened her eyes and quickly pushed Tom away. “Shit. The food.” She yells out, jumping from Tom’s embrace. Both of them tried to calm their heart rate and Tom stood their watching Y/N, smiling at what had just happened. For once he had his girl back, and everything felt normal. Y/N looks at him, giggling. “What?” She asks.

“Nothing.” He replies, grinning like a little boy. “I’ve waited to do that for so long.”

Y/N blushes at his statement, as she sets up the table with the food. “Come on. It’s time to eat.”

Life seemed surreal after her encounter with Tom. Y/N told herself that it was a one time thing until they found Unknown. She didnt want to put anyone at risk especially both her’s and Tom’s heart. But everytime she told herself, the more she got lost in Tom. Every stolen moment, stolen kisses, stolen touch...he always had a way of making her forget. So while she vowed to herself that it would stop, her heart simply couldn’t. Tom was right, there was no PR, no text messages, no insane fan account rumor. Natalie hadn’t even bothered either of them, always focused on her own thing, and truthfully seemed a lot nicer when she came forth about being a victim of Unknown. The questions came to Y/N’s mind. Why should she have to live in fear? Why not just live in the moment?

It was a slow night. Harrison had spent the weekend at his mother’s while Harry did the same. Tom and Y/N were the only ones that roamed aroundthe house. While Natalie spent her time contemplating everything. Her initial plan to crush Y/N when she least expected was approaching ever so quickly after all the time it took to set up. Within that time, she had gotten to know Y/N and Tom even more so a part from the hatred and the jealousy. For a second...just a second, she considered not to follow through. But her mother’s words and the thought of losing her chances with Tom overtook her the moment she saw the two fall in love all over again. Her suspicions only became worse when she recirved a text from her mother.

Unknown

Just remember, your acting career and your dreams depend on Tom. If you want Tom to choose you, you better get rid of the girl stealing your chances.

Filled with worry, Natalie quickly grabbed her things and made her way out the door.

Meanwhile, Tom and Y/N continued to spend time in each others arms everywhere they went in the house. They settled on the couch, Tom’s stong hands wrapping around her torso as Y/N curled herself into Tom. “I wish we could stay like this forever.” She whispers to him.

Tom hums at the idea, smiling wide. “Me too.” He brings her soft lips to his, letting them linger for a couple seconds more. “Do you really enjoy staying in the guest room?” Tom asks.

Y/N looks up at him, with curious eyes. “I mean yeah it’s okay. Why?”

Tom takes a deep breath before asking, “Well...I was uh wondering, if you didn’t like it as much there, you could..maybe stay with me...again.” He suggested muttering the last word. Tom smiled nervously, as he observes Y/N’s emotions. She was calm like the sea before a storm.

Y/N smiles at his offer, but shakes her head. “Mmm..it’s okay. Im fine where I am, but thank you for the generous offer.” She responds, placing a small kiss on his cheek.

“Yeah...I guess I should have seen that coming.” Tom admits, his face showing signs of disappointment.

Y/N pouts her lips, and lifts her small hand to move a piece of his hair. “Hey..believe me. I want to but nows the not the time..at least not yet. One day, I promise.” She whispers leaving a chaste kiss on his lips. “C’mon we got another day tomorrow. I’m gonna head into my room for a bit.”

“I’ll come up later just wanna make a call to Harrison.” Tom replies. Y/N looks at him and smiles as she nods and heads back up to her room.

As the night came to an end, Y/N took the time to unwind with a book in hand when her phone went off. Her face dropped when she saw the messages.

Pictures of Natalie out and about wearing Tom’s clothes and jewlery, smiling into the sun and enjoying her day out with friends. Gossips left and right from fans and media, talking about how adorable it was that Natalie was the type of girlfriend to steal her boyfriends clothes because it looks cuter on her. Y/N knew deep down it wasn’t true but the words and pictures taunted her. Slowly and surely, she started to get mad, furious that Natalie would start the flame again out of nowhere when she promised Tom they would stopped. Another message popped up for Y/N, and it was from someone she so willingly prayed it wouldnt be who she thought.

Unknown

Doesn’t she look cute in his clothes. Probably better than you ever could. BTW..where is lover boy? 😉

Y/N throws her phone against the wall, pissed more than ever. She should have known this was going to happen. Y/N contemplated the message, she wondered what the text meant. After all Unknown seeemed to know more about everyone here better than they knew themselves. Y/N slowly went downstairs only to hear whispering coming from the kitchen. She couldn’t make out the exact words but she could identify the voice. It was Tom and Natalie? She took a peak at the kitchen where the two stood facing each other. Y/N couldn’t make out Tom’s face but she could see Natalie’s very clearly. “Kiss me.” Natalie whispers, as she quickly places her lips on Tom’s cradling his neck, but Tom didn’t stop. The moment his eyes opened up to see Y/N’s he pushed Natalie off with all his might.

Y/N standing there in shock and sadness. Her eyes tearing up, her breaths shortening. She shakes her head, as she replays the disturbing image in her mind. “Y/N... it’s not what it looks like.” Tom quickly defends, trying to reach for Y/N as she steps back. Natalie observing the two, a slight smirk forming across her face. “I swear it was for the PR and movie.” He yells out, trying to chase her.

Y/N whips back as she faces Tom, the angriest she has ever been with him. “Who are you putting a show for in this house? Me? Because I sure as hell didn’t fucking like it one bit. I should have known better.” She spits out, heading up the stairs with Tom following.

“Y/N..please. It didn’t mean anything. I swear. I was put in a compromising position. Please listen to me.” Tom pleads. The door to her room is shut locked, but he stays there waiting and knocking at the door. “Y/N. Don’t do this. Dont walk away. Please just let me explain. You know what we have is special and the moment at the kitchen and everything this past month...”

“Was ruined and a complete and utter mistake. Leave me alone and I swear Tom you even try to get near me I will make sure you never see the light of day. I should have fucking stayed back.” Y/N yells out, sobbing against the door. It was a nightmare, and this time she couldn’t get out. She sat there now realizing, her heart had broken completely for the second time.

Taglist:

@hollanddolanfangirl @ifilosemyselfagain @hevjadams @averyfosterthoughts​ @fangirl-with-a-mission @drishtisikarwar @eridanuswave​ @ifntelyinspirit @trumpettay @astridcommings @parkershoco @racewife2004 @sleepybesson @greatpizzascissorstaco @andievgs @joyleenl @holland-bowen @in-a-lot-of-fandoms-tbh @viwihere @marvelobsessedteenager @panicattheeverywherekid @oswinO5 @jillanaholland