#it's 3 am and everything feels like a conspiracy
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glouris · 1 year ago
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About some characters’ possible incarnations in previous samsaras
So Teyvat is trapped in a cycle, is constantly going through samsaras, and reincarnation really is all but confirmed now apparently. 
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A lot of people jumped to point at Childe and Parsifal, then speculate which other historical figures could also be his previous incarnations.
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Childe's case is really, really interesting, but I wanted to bring up another character that also seems to be pulled into this samsara vortex somehow - Itto. 
(This is gonna be long and have A LOT of reaches and speculations.)
Let’s look at Akuou (Touzannou) from Watatsumi Island. We don't have confirmation on which species he actually belonged to, but from what information we have on him, he would most likely be either a vishap hybrid, or an oni. He was described as “the wicked fangs and claws of the Great Serpent, the savage, demonic invader of Yashiori Island”. “‘Fangs and claws of the Serpent” makes it sound like he was a vishap, but I think him being called “demonic” is a more important characterisation here. The name ‘Akuou’ also may be a reference to the legends of Akuro'ou - “an ancient demonic warrior in the Japanese folklore who fought against the imperial court”, so again, demonic, an oni. And, well, oni also have claws and fangs, but I did have to mention that this guy could be a lizard person instead. 
If we assume that Touzannou was an oni, we can start to notice a lot of coincidences pile up. First, Touzannou’s personality seems to resemble Itto’s - he was reckless, boastful, presumptuous, but very kind. Not the brightest mind, as it’s said that “his strength was his only strength". He came up with his own fighting styles that are still passed down on Watatsumi. Itto’s fighting style is his own as well: 
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(I love Itto so much man.)
Touzannou fought the Tengu Sasayuri and was called Akuou  - “Wicked King”; Kokomi’s Everlasting Moonglows story mentions it like that: 
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Itto’s Redhorn tells a story about an “Otogi King”, who was boisterous and boastful too. And that’s where it gets weird, please walk with me. One of Itto’s passive talents is getting more wood, and if we look at how the trees are distributed on the map, the VAST majority of the Otogi trees are found on Yashiori Island.
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As already mentioned, Yashiori was invaded by Orobashi and his people 2000 years ago, and ultimately became the resting place for Akuou (Touzannou) and shrine maiden Mouun, a very important figure I’ll talk about later. 99% of Itto’s story quest also happens to take place on Yashiori.
A cornplate detail, but Itto was also at Nazuchi Beach (Yashiori Island sub-area) in his dedicated album posted on genshin’s youtube channel. The ost playing on Nazuchi Beach is called Stranded Wish, which is quite an interesting name choice for a place that suffered so much tragedy and war. 
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(This is also actually a Watatsumi ship, as mentioned by an npc we can talk to there)
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Speaking of Watatsumi, Itto’s most obvious connection to it is through Gorou, as he is his dedicated support. The less obvious connection is his similarities with Akuou, and some things involving Kokomi. Sure, his quest is only accessible after you complete Kokomi’s, and their signature artifacts in the same domain, but her involvement seems to run a bit deeper than that. 
You see, the whole thing that started it all is Akuou being mentioned in Kokomi’s donut. At first I thought it’s actually the same guy from the Redhorn, because their description was so similar, basically just ‘evil king that fights a tengu’. But it was exactly this description that made me notice some interesting pattern of interconnected characters.
2000 years ago: Akuou the Evil King, Mouun the shrine maiden and Tengu Sasayuri. 
500 year ago: Tengu Reizenbou, Asase Hibiki and Ako Domeki.
Present day: Arataki Itto, Kokomi, and Kujou Sara. 
Take a look at depictions of Asase Hibiki (left) and Mouun (right) from the TCG cards:
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Their haircuts seem to be identical, with the hair color being the only difference. Better yet, it's also similar to Kokomi's haircut. 
The oni from their respective time periods (or samsaras) are named Akuou, Ako and Arataki. Inconsequential, but interesting. 
Let’s take a look at Ako Domeki, and speculate a little (or a lot). Both Akuou and Itto had conflicts with a tengu, but Ako seemingly didn’t. But, since he’s 500 years back on the timeline, it puts him on the same time period as Tengu Reizenbou and the ‘otogi king’ from Itto’s redhorn. There is a slight chance that this ‘otogi king’ was actually Ako Domeki post Serai and Golden Apple, but there’s nothing really to prove or disprove this, apart from the fact that they both have similarities with Akuou and Itto.
Another thing that could possibly have something to do with Ako Domeki are those weird oni symbols scattered around Watatsumi. These symbols are connected to Rinzou's Treasure world quest - you look for pirate treasure, and find Rinzou’s letter where he talks about his life.
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This “outlander king” inspired Rinzou to leave Watatsumi when he grew up. And, it’s interesting that he chose an oni mask as his insignia when he left Watatsumi. If this old man was the reason for him to go into the world to seek adventure at sea and become a pirate, it would make sense for his insignia to be inspired by this old man. Which would make him an oni. 
Could this be Ako Domeki, an oni pirate, that inspired another person to become a pirate? It’s far-fetched, but again, as we don’t have any confirmation for the end of Ako Domeki story, it could have really been him. 
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Getting back to Akuou and Mouun. Mouun’s name has a very interesting possible origin: 
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Kokomi’s ‘slumbering dragon’ constellation comes to mind here. 
Mouun was friends with a great 900 year old whale called Daikengyou.
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They both were slain during the Yashiori Island invasion. But, the fact that this whale managed to live for so long almost definitely means that it was no ordinary whale - perhaps it was the same creature as the All Devouring Narwhal. 
Meanwhile Kokomi had a whale in her demo, which should definetly raise some red flags.
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Akuou was taught different rituals by Mouun and her sister Ayame, including an art of whalesong. Interestingly enough, Itto is a very good singer apparently:  
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So, in light of recent developments with whales in the main story, I don’t really think that this art of ‘whalesong’ was something connected to ordinary marine life, it’s too specific now. Given that Orobashi was actively opposing Heavenly Principles, I won’t put it past him and his followers to be involved with the likes of Surtalogi that keeps celestial whales as pets. 
Last thing, the books about Akuou and Mouun, as well as about other Watatsumi dealings (Debates on the "Viceroy of the East", A Preliminary Study of Sangonomiya Folk Belief, The Life of Mouun the Shrine Maiden, and more) are not in the book archive, but in the quest items. Must be important. 
So, let’s round things up. Akuou, Ako Domeki, Arataki Itto, all with similar sounding names, are boisterous, kind oni, that all have mentions of being called ‘kings’ (Itto’s ult is called ‘raging oni king state’), all have some ties to Yashiori Island (Ako Domeki is mentioned on a note on Nazuchi Beach, and if the Otogi King and him really were the same person, there’s Yashiori having the most otogi trees in Inazuma), all being exceptional fighters, all having ties to a notable tengu and a shrine maiden, that also have connections to characters taking on the same role from a different time periods. 
Ako Domeki is up in the air, but Akuou and Itto really do seem to be connected somehow.
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medicinemane · 14 days ago
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Sometimes I feel like I'm going crazy
You have... very very very very very very very very smart people you know, and they're say something that not only isn't true, but literally is as opposite of the truth as it's possible to be... and you'll... gently inform them "hey, it's actually a bit more like this" and then they just kinda... go on saying literally the exact same thing
I'm not sure if it's just that... I often feel like I must be very bad at communicating, or people must just not notice/ignore a lot of what I say, but... I don't know
Like dearest friend, you've said something as absurd as... I don't know, it's hard to say without saying it, but honest to god about as absurd as saying the United States was a part of the USSR, that level of completely getting it backwards
...and it just doesn't seem to matter when I try to explain it... I legit don't even know if you read what I said
Really end up feeling like I'm going nuts sometimes
#to be clear; I don't mind people disagreeing with me (though that's not what's happened here... I don't think I came into it at all)#but all I need in order to be able to work with disagreement is just... knowing you at least heard and understood me#like if it's 'I get that you think that vanilla is a good flavor of icecream; but I really prefer chocolate'... ok; this works for me#it's that... a lot of the time it honest feels more like 'what are you talking about? vanilla isn't a flavor' where... huh?#let's take a real example; not everyone needs to agree with me on nuclear#but like... someone saying 'I get that it's way safer these days; but I still worry about waste storage'... well ok then#but if it's just like 'but it's dangerous and will explode' even after I've explained about the designs now#where there's a salt plug that with melt and drain before anything can happen; and these materials don't like to run away#...and it's not like they're asking me to back up the source; it's like I never said anything at all...#what am I supposed to do here? you feel me on that? do you start to get why I feel like I'm going crazy when that's how it often feels?#no one is obliged to agree with me but... literally just active listening would fix this... say you heard me and we're good#acknowledge that I voiced something and it's been noted#honestly... honestly my who life it's felt like I must somehow actually be invisible#...to an extent maybe I'm a figment of my own imagination; I might well be a ghost that's lonely and makes you all up#...for all the impact my actions have#or maybe literally everything I say just comes out garbled... is that it?#this post is about something very specific; but it's also about something that happens a lot with a lot of different people#on a broader scale; why is it no one else seems to be able to connect the dots#and these aren't like... conspiracy theory dots; these are like russia buys drones from Iran; therefore russia and Iran are partners#that's the kind of dots I'm talking about connecting; please tell me that's not a conspiracy theory to you... it seems plain to me#I don't know... I really don't... I don't think much I say will ever have any impact anywhere on anyone#...honestly a good 90% of the time people don't even respond to what I say#not like my posts here; I mean direct in dms or whatever; I'll say stuff and it's just silence or a new subject#again; across multiple people; it's common... it's... I think it happens more often than it doesn't#I can instantly name 4 conversations with 4 different people that's happened with lately#and that's not counting the 3 where I know the reason why it's happened#I really am something unfit to live; the evidence is endless#mm tag so i can find things later
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salemlunaa · 4 months ago
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VOID STATE EXPLAINED: HOW TO GET THE LIFE YOU DREAM OF ᥫ᭡
A TELL-ALL GUIDE TO THE METHOD EVERYONE IS TALKING ABOUT
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so in my asks i have alot of people going “sai, you always go on and on and on and on about the void and different problems people may have, but you never explain what it is and how to get there”And to be honest with you, most of my posts were meant to be that way because i knew of other blogs explaining the void and my blog was just meant to be follow up posts for those who already knew about the void. Although, now i feel more confident and equipped to explain the void in its entirety.
so strap in for this long ass post because this is a gonna be THE guide (if you can’t tell i’m very excited for this post)
i just wanna say that this post is an inspiration and a remix of all those that have inspired me
1. What is the void?
so as you can see yourself and life right now is you in the physical plane (the notorious 3D) you are experiencing the world as *your name* *your lastname*, and your experience is confined by the way that you initially came into the world, being y/n y/ln . The void, originally known as the “I AM” state is when you leave that experience behind, you leave the physical world behind and become nothing and everything at the exact same time. And doing so you can create and destroy absolutely anything in your experience = your reality which is why people call their destination after the void their “dr”=“desired reality”.
2. Why the void?
This method is seen as very effective and efficient once you know how to do it right because it’s a “method” in which your subconscious mind is in full control, which means you can do absolutely anything and that’s not some conspiracy or belief, it is a fact that when entering this subconscious-based meditation state that you can do absolutely anything, which is why i said that you have the power to create and destroy anything in the physical plane, altering your experience. You can change your genetics, your family and friends, your wealth, gender, where you live and much more. You can also redesign things, like a country for you to live in, your age, your s/o’s age, your memories and just your life in general. Just one trip to the void and all that you dream of is yours.
The void doesn’t have to be pitch black you can design it anyway you like, i see alot of people in my dms and asks, saying that the pitch black scares them, but your void can look anyway you want.
personally i’m not scared but i just wanted my void to look cute so i added pink stars to the pitch black
3. How do i get to the void?
There are many ways to get into the void, you can follow a guided many meditation, you can listen to subliminals or waves, you can simply affirm, you can visualise, or you can simply do none of these and go into the void with just the intent, KNOWING that it’s apart of you. You don’t need any method to tap into the void, all you need is yourself and the intent, knowing it’s apart of you and not some magical fairyland. You can enter at anytime of day, because you’re a god and don’t need to be confined to “time”. “Time” is a malleable concept and i’ll be dammed if you guys waste your days because you only believe that you can tap in at night.
4. Problems people have with the void
3 things: wavering, laziness and putting the void on a damn pedestal
a lot of you guys fail to enter the void simply because you try to enter. all the things i have said about the void make it almost impossible to believe, a golden ticket to your dream life with one trip to the void. And because of the fact that we have been conditioned to believe that we have to work for everything we have, this just seems to good to be true. and you see the void as some magical place when it’s YOU, the void is YOU, why do you think you affirm “I Am”? well it’s because the void is literally the state of you being everything but nothing, it is not a place it is a state, hence the void STATE, the “I Am” STATE. it’s a meditative state and that’s it.
When you enter the "I AM" state, why do you affirm phrases like "I am, I am pure consciousness, I am the void, I am unattached to any reality, I am faceless and formless"? It's because these affirmations align you with your divine essence, your true God Self. However, this practice is often short-lived. You enter this state briefly, and when you don't experience any immediate changes or wake up in the same shitty reality, you begin to doubt. You think, "Why hasn't it worked? I must be doing something wrong. I'll try again tonight." This is what wavering looks like. You declare yourself to be in the "I AM" state, but when it doesn’t immediately manifest, you believe it hasn't worked and attempt to re-enter it repeatedly. This endless cycle of trying can confuse your subconscious mind. Instead of truly embodying the state, you're constantly oscillating, creating inconsistency and doubt.
STOP TRYING AND START BEING, OR YOU WILL GET NOWHERE
the void is the easiest thing ever and it is owed to you, because it is you
you can literally enter right now and have every single thing you’ve ever wanted, with just a meditation state, the void isn’t the one with the power it’s you. The void is inside of you and it is lifeless, the only time it gains any power is when YOU step into the equation. As i once said, the void is your bitch not the other way around.
5. Unhealthy relationships
Although the void is one of the best methods i know, i would hate for anyone to accumulate an unhealthy, toxic relationship with the void. The void is as easy as breathing, i know, but it can be alot for some of us to wrap our heads around due to the way we have been conditioned to think (which hurts my heart more than you know). I see people spend months and years trying to get into the void going through an emotionally taxing experience with it. Although i tell people it doesn’t matter how much time you’ve “wasted” and not to let that discourage you because you could really enter now if you put your mind to it (no pun intended) , if you know that it has been eating you up trying for the void going around a constant cycle, please take a break or use other methods.
now with that i say go, go and redesign yourself, deconstruct yourself and create the new you, start from scratch and make your dream self, go to the void and get your dream life.
don’t try, just be 🌊💋
i really hope you loved this as much as i do, now go get your dream life -salem ᥫ᭡
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crossbackpoke-check · 1 year ago
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the world at its beginning, dustin pearson // mosaic, linda pastan [Link to IHL’s Solar Bears connects NHL Draft prospect to Orlando] // Goin' high: Hughes chooses No. 86 with Devils // twice your size, declan mckenna // jeff bassett // blue is beautiful amy but the story is so the '90s, farrah field // what it means to be alive at the time of the resurrection of the dead, michalle gould // Quinn Hughes impresses youngest brother Luke with All-Star play // mozart songbook, joan larkin // siblings, paul klee // closeness lines, olivia de recat // andrew hancock // brother's keeper, young the giant // jason e. miczek // michigan athletics // "he ain't heavy, he's my brother", the hollies // luke hughes can follow brothers as first-round pick at 2021 nhl draft // genesis (from music for the dead and resurrected), valzhyna mort // jack hughes once had his braces 'ripped off his face' in a moment of sibling rivalry //
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After Abel, Dante Émile // sportingnews // Cain, José Saramago (trans. Margaret Jull Costa) // Dave Sandford // Kin, Clan and Community in Proto-Indo-European Society, Birgit Anette Olsen // ESPN // Wikipedia // ESPN // Jeff Vinnick // Genesis, Valzhyna Mort // Puckprose // I Cast It Away, My Body, William Bearhart // Puckprose // Cain slaying Abel, Abraham Bloemaert (1590) // NHL // Clive Baker // Puckprose // NHL // Murder Ballad in the Land of Nod, Traci Brimhall // Freep // The Changes of Cain: Violence and the Lost Brother in Cain and Abel Literature, Ricardo J. Quinones // penticton western news // The Book of a Monastic Life, Rainer Maria Rilke (trans. Anita Barrows and Joanna Macy) // "A Brother Named Gethsemane", Natalie Diaz // NHL // NHL // Ivan the Terrible and His Son Ivan on 16 November 1581, Ilya Repin (1883-1885) NHL // Brothers, Dan Pagis (trans. Shirley Kaufman) // Fox News // NHL // NHL // Wikipedia // Fox News // NHL // Cain, José Saramago (trans. Margaret Jull Costa) // Allaboutthejersey // Allaboutthejersey // Jewish Literacy, Rabbi Joseph Telushkin
#OH I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THAT TUMBLR USER NATIONAL HOCKEY LESBIAN WOULD HAVE MADE IT *WORSE* THIS IS A CONSPIRACY 2 OF MY FAVORITE EDIT MAKERS#y’all really. pls excuse the imposition but i wanted to contribute <3 pls go reblog the original & addition & also come join me in the bog#S T O P#quinn hughes#jack hughes#luke hughes#sorry it is not as graceful not as composed it is nearly midnight & i am on four hours of sleep so we are off the rails :)#hi besties. i wrote that tag at 11 pm. it is now 3:33 AM sorry to OP i went like. absolutely unhinged if you want me to turn it into my ow#post just say the word i think i lost a little bit of the precise catholic guilt focus but i am vaguely on theme#i think#granted at this point i don't know if i would know#and i'm not going to be unhinged about hugheses and 3s because i can't do that but 3:33AM? on god?#anyway i will come put my original tags from the original post here in the morning but i have to be awake in approximately 2 hours BYEEEEEE#liv in the replies#HI I’M BACK everyone please kindly ignore the fact that genesis is on this post twice even thought i SPECIFICALLY checked eight times#to make sure it wasn’t used ghostgeno’s original post but. it is the thing that kicked this off for me & also it’s maybe my second favorite#if not favorite part of the brainworms because of my favorite line in the poem (aren’t we the keepers of our dead) and yes#with the childhood and death of innocence both literal and metaphorical cain committed the first murder before that there was no such thing#anyway now here are the original tags that i had when i first saw the post:#OP YOU USUALLY MAKE ME FEEL UNHINGED BUT THIS ONE IS SO. THIS ONE IS SOOOOOO OH MY GOD THE WAY I FEEL ABOUT THE HUGHESES I *HAVE* A POST ABT#AM I MY BROTHER’s KEEPER THE ABEL/CAIN POEM sorry i am shrieking but don’t want to just keep yelling in your tags so imagine everything is#still at a frequency that could shatter glass and that i am wailing facedown into the bottom of a peat bog. i feel so many things oh my god#like can we talk about the divine threes and the perfection of the narrative of three hugheses and how they slot so well into their roles &#is that them or the narrative that’s been woven around them how do you untangle who you would be without it/because of it/the difference#would quinn be an eldest daughter if he wasn’t jack always in the middle i have to FIND!! my unhinged posts!! i was just reading in my notes#the ending of the one where jack thinks he’ll always have lukey to look up to him but the betrayal when luke sided w/quinn about something &#there’s a beautiful art piece of quinn/jack/luke that my brain built some kind of universe around where quinn was the desolation jack was#desire & luke was disgust & i’m literally so obsessed with it even if i can’t flesh out the concept for the life of me & basically what i’m#trying to say is that the hugheses narrative is fucking FASCINATING & if i think about it for too long i vibrate into the sun (son) & cease#i also. i didn’t know how to do it but there are very much hugheses vibes in ‘the prisoner of chillon’
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paranoiddreams · 12 days ago
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Random Headcannons: Yuji✰
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ღ Warnings!! - Sukuna is a whole tw, some of them are a little suggestive but in a goofy way (?), me just yapping tbh, explicit language, mentions of Drake😖, marijuana use🍃, ADHD mentions, he’s kinda brainrotted okay?
ღ A/n!! - Some may be ooc to yall but this is how I see him in my head tbh😭 I’m just going off of vibes. Lmk who you want next! Requests for any fandom on my navi are always welcome!! I’m also working on a longer fic rn, so to that anon who sent a Sukuna request (yk who you are), it’s coming soon🫵🏻😈
Masterlist | navi
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Was so invested in the Kendrick Lamar vs. Drake situation Imao. He knew everything that happened from when it started to when it unofficially ended.
Yaps about it to anyone who will listen, and let’s be honest, everyone will because he's such a charming guy
Might just be me, but I feel strongly that Yuji had an emo phase in his middle schools years. I'm talking My Chemical Romance kinda emo, yk, the freaky ones
Not speaking out of experience or anything haha😶‍🌫️
Does actually love J law, and will watch compilations on YouTube at 3 am. What can he say? He's a loyal man.
He watches CaseOh 100% and does have notifs for him on
Chronic iPad kid, it's bad
And to make things worse he can't eat without watching anything (like most of us let's be fr)
He uses the excuse that "kings have always had entertainment while they feast back in the day, what's the difference?”
Sukuna literally couldn't be more ashamed to be in this gen z brainrot teenager's body.
DOES NOT play around when it comes to a Roblox tycoon. Don't cross ma boy in his tycoons.
Actually talks to Sukuna telepathically(?) sometimes. Like when he's bored he'll just-
"Sukuna, do you actually have two dicks?"
"Shut the fuck up."
Most likely listens to Tame Impala, Cuco, Suicideboy$, maybe even a little Pierce the veil time to time. Also loves K-pop and girl groups like BTS, New Jeans, and ENHYPHEN.
His biases are Jungkook, Hanni, & Jake :3
Considered using his hand mouth thing to jerk off one time, but was swiftly turned away from the idea when Sukuna heard him think of it and told him he'd kill him instantly : (
Smokes 🍃 every once in a while when he has a weekend free
He’s a talker when he’s high fs
Will go off about conspiracy theories, and this sounds cliche, but istg he would do this shi
He’s a genuine conspiracy theorist when he’s sober too tbh
But Indica gets him talking🤝
I kinda wrote abt this in one of my requests, but I think that Yuji is a huge fan of getting scared and just having that thrill
Haunted houses, scary movies, music, stories, he loves all of it.
I mean, Gojo made him watch like one million bajillion (real) movies, so ofc he’s grown a fondness for anything over the top disturbing/cheesy
He’s one of those people who’s annoyingly good at everything he tries on the FIRST try.
He doesn’t mean to, but he will one up anyone he’s in the room with😭
Yuji DOES NOT fuck with Xbox, he’s a PlayStation girlie✨
He has a thing for chubby girls 😶‍🌫️ just dropping this here bc I may or may not have smth in the works…
He’d be able to make friends with a roach in the corner of the room, he’s such a caring, compassionate guy, but we already knew this.
Gives ADHD realness
Has definitely called Gojo ‘dad’ by accident a few times before.
Strikes me as the type to flirt and not even realize…
F2L &/or grumpy x sunshine vibes all the way!!!
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airbender-dacyon · 1 month ago
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Benlynn Parallels & Analysis
Alright, so this is by no means an exhaustive list, just what I am able to recall right now, but here's some of the Ben & Brooklynn parallels I noticed from Season 1 of Chaos Theory, as well as a few under the cut that are speculation based on trailers and promos from Season 2 (so spoiler warning for those). And I ended up doing more analysis on this than I intended, whoops.
Apologies for the long post, but I wanted to keep any spoilers under the cut and this ended up being much longer than I planned. I also apologize because it's been a minute since I've been able to watch Camp Cretaceous in its entirety and a bit since I last watched S1 of Chaos Theory so I hope my memory is right on most of this.
Also, this is meant to just be a fun post. It is a ship post, but I also acknowledge that the parallels likely don't mean anything beyond they're friends with shared interests/similar traits (if they even mean that).
Dark Jurassic Nerds
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"What about that website I showed you?" "OMG. Dark Jurassic? Yes. Amazing." "Isn't it?"
Ben, in a surprising twist to me, was the one to discover Dark Jurassic. When Camp Cretaceous ended, I wouldn't have guessed he would be the one to become invested in a social media site. I will say that it makes sense that Brooklynn, having grown up as a social media influencer, was staying away from social media more after the Nublar Six returned home and that she didn't come across Dark Jurassic sooner. Regardless, the pair are both heavily invested in the website, though Brooklynn seems to have vetted the theories more than Ben, given her interaction with Yaz:
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So it seems like Ben had a habit of sending a lot of stuff he found interesting her way, but only a few things, like the Dino Immersion Therapy, Brooklynn found to be legit.
2. "Okay, at first, I was like, ugh. But this view!"
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I still think it is surprising that between Ben's flashback and Kenji's flashback, Brooklynn expresses more excitement over the view of a pretty ordinary skyline from the rooftop of a college dormitory that Ben shows her during her surprise visit than she does the bioluminescent Parasaurolophus at sunset amidst cliffs and a waterfall that her boyfriend of 5+ years had planned as a big romantic gesture.
We don't know the exact date when Brooklynn visited Ben at college, so I fully admit that probably plays a big part in the difference in Brooklynn's reaction. Since this is shortly after Ben introduced Brooklynn to Dark Jurassic and we know that 1) Brooklynn visited Yaz 14 months before the start of Season 1 and 2) Kenji broke up with Brooklynn shortly before (at least a few weeks, I believe) her apparent death roughly 6 months before S1, the Benlynn flashback takes place at least 14 months before S1, probably even earlier than that. Heck, it might be 18-24 months before S1. So, obviously Brooklynn is in a much healthier headspace in Ben's flashback whereas she had become obsessed with uncovering the dinosaur trafficking conspiracy by the time of Kenji's flashback, resulting in her indirectly neglecting her relationship with him.
3. Funny Stories, Personal Questions, & Other Shared Interests?
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"Uh, yeah. College is great, but sometimes I gotta get outside just to feel like I can breathe." "Weird how it can be so hard to feel normal, now that everything is so... normal." "See those Pteranodons up there?" "Uh-huh." "One of them grabbed a freshman's backpack and took off with it." "No way." "She had to tell her professor that a dinosaur ate her homework." [Brooklynn laughs] "What?" "That's really funny." "Well, not to her. She failed her assignment." [Brooklynn laughs harder] "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. No, I'm sorry, that's really sad." [Snorts] "That's sad." "The point is, I don't know if there's such a thing as normal anymore." "Yeah."
It hadn't been my intention to quote such a large chunk of the flashback, but I do find it interesting how this interaction between these two played out. Ben & Brooklynn had only a handful of scenes - more accurately, a handful of interactions - together in Camp Cretaceous. And so to see these two alone together and enjoying each other's company was refreshing to see. Again, this isn't a 'they shared a moment together, now they're going to end up together' post. The fact that there was a significant flashback that highlighted how Ben & Brooklynn get along, despite not being one of the other's closest friends within the Nublar Six, was a stellar choice. They could have easily done for Ben what they did with Sammy: a very brief, but still impactful memory/vision of Brooklynn.
But in this scene, it's neat that Ben is telling the story to reassure Brooklynn that 1) even though they've been home safe from Nublar for years now, their experiences will never go away and 2) prehistoric wildlife is out in the world, "normal" doesn't really exist and they shouldn't expect it to. Like on Nublar, they have to adapt to the new dynamic. But, intentionally or not, Ben is also telling the story in a very humorous way, which results in Brooklynn's laughter. And whether you see the moment as shippy or just friends, it was pretty adorable to see Ben making Brooklynn laugh.
The scene on the rooftop also begins in a rather interesting way, as Ben's dialogue starts by announcing the rooftop view is his favorite spot on campus, followed by why he goes there/gets outside. So, presumably, Brooklynn had asked him how college was going. And after the Pteranodon story, Ben does something unique to the flashbacks we've seen in Season 1.
He asks Brooklynn how she's been doing.
"Anyway, how's everything with you? Any cool stories you're working on? Wrongs to be righted? Buried truths to be uncovered?" [Laughs] "Trying. It is hard out there for a reformed "social media influencer turned aspiring investigative journalist."
Now again, I fully recognize this is the easiest catalyst in the flashback to introduce Brooklynn's interest/activity in Dark Jurassic. And I also fully recognize that we haven't seen Darius' flashback with Brooklynn yet and Sammy's vision/memory of Brooklynn is too short to really compare to the other three we've seen so far.
However, in Yaz's flashback, we see Brooklynn is the one helping her with the Dino Immersion Therapy and inquiring about how she's doing, why she's there instead of Sammy, etc. And in Kenji's flashback, we see that he's so excited to share the view he's discovered with Brooklynn. And when she is too distracted (presumably by her mission) to acknowledge the beauty of the moment, Kenji breaks up with her and his dialogue suggests this has been happening for a while.
The video recordings of the earlier Kenlynn date and when the Nublar Six returned home at least give us a glimpse into happier times. But with regards to the flashbacks, while Brooklynn is likely there to check up on her friend (unannounced and strangely late in the evening from the looks of it), Ben's flashback is the only one where the focus seems to be on both characters equally rather than Brooklynn acting in a supporting/secondary role in the scene.
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A much smaller parallel, likely unintentional, is that Ben and Brooklynn seem to (almost) have matching outfits in the flashback.
Continuing from that, and acknowledging similar outfits is already a stretch, I guess there is a parallel with music? Kinda?
We see in Brooklynn's video call to Darius that she is wearing what looks like a band/album T-shirt and Ben has become quite the fan of rock music. Some of the concept art for Ben's dorm room also showcased several band posters, if I recall correctly.
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So, while not a certainty, it seems they could have also developed a connection through similar music tastes, though this is a fair bit of speculation.
4. Boots
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Another parallel that's a stretch, but Ben eating food out of a boot seemed really, really odd when it was introduced. Perhaps out of desperation, maybe he accidentally broke his last bowl or ran out of disposable ones? Who knows. An odd choice, especially with the later Ruby Ropes container conversation being weird enough on its own that the food boot seemed excessive.
But then it was shown that Brooklynn also had an unfortunate boot-related habit, though fortunately nowhere near as disgusting. Kenji trips over one of her boots and comments on it, with Darius also having suffered from the problem:
"She was always leaving these in the middle of the floor. It was so annoying. I was so afraid I was gonna-" "Break your neck?" "Did she do that when she was staying with you after we broke up?" [Chuckles] "I swear she did it just to annoy us."
Again, this one's a big stretch, but it felt like a possibility.
5. A specific set of skills
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Or, rather, just one skill. I can't remember if any other members of the Nublar Six ever picked any locks throughout the shows, but Ben having a set of dedicated lock picks was an interesting development. All of the N6 have picked up new skills in the time between CC and CT, but Ben's activities - and this skill in particular - seem to mirror a lot of Brooklynn's.
6. Conspiracy Boards
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Again, going back to the fact that Brooklynn was more interested in legitimate stories and credible theories, Ben's board is quite a mess while Brooklynn's is more refined. Ben's looking into all the possibilities, no matter how ridiculous they might be, whereas Brooklynn is focused on (presumably) unraveling the dinosaur trafficking conspiracy and anything else nefarious that might be going on in relation to it.
7. Season 1 Bookends (unused)
I don't want to repost the art without permission and I really want to get the post up today, so credit to Brandon Roberts in this concept art post here. It shows Ben on his laptop in his dorm room.
However, I will provide the description Brandon Roberts gave, as well as the confirmation by Scott Kreamer on the post:
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This would have been an interesting parallel and way to bookend the season: opening with Ben on Dark Jurassic getting vague messages and closing out with Ronnie sending vague messages to someone on Dark Jurassic and the reveal that it's Brooklynn.
And only time will tell if there is something real between these two. Or it might all be just an illusion.
"There's definitely some pretty out-there stuff on there, but every so often there's something that seems, I don't know..." "Real?" "Real."
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And aside from the spoilery speculation below, I think this might be it. There could be other parallels I'd thought of previously, but as of right now, this is all I can remember. If you made it this far, thanks for reading my inane ramblings. I hope you enjoyed!
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Also, shoutouts to @p0m0u and @kitabearuwu for being the inspiration for me falling down the Benlynn rabbit hole and continued inspiration since (we'll see if I can get my Benlynn fic done by tomorrow), especially their posts here, here, here, and here. And special thanks to @p0m0u for letting me use the beautiful gifs she made in this post!
Spoilers for Season 2 Trailers & Promo material under the cut!
Starting from what I feel is the weakest parallel to the strongest:
8. Why are you holding that in your mouth?
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When I saw the tweezers or tool or whatever fall from Brooklynn's mouth, I swear I'd seen Ben do something like it before in the show. I tried to scour Season 1 of CT to find it, but to no avail. I then remembered where I'd seen something similar, back in Season 4 of CC. Again, leading with the weakest parallel here, but like the boots, I find it interesting and odd that both of them have held things in their mouths - and these are things that probably shouldn't be held in their mouths - only to drop them at some point during the scene. Ben's out of relief that the BRAD is gone, Brooklynn's potentially by whoever is breaking into her location (if the clips immediately before and after are part of the same scene).
9. You're great and I like you, but...
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Given that it looks like we'll have a Darius and Brooklynn flashback finally, I have to wonder, will it play out in a similar vein to the Ben & Yaz moment in S4 of CC? We know that Ben mistook Yaz's interest in getting him away from Kenji & Brooklynn so that Kenlynn could develop as romantic interest. What if we see Brooklynn realize Darius' growing affection for her and makes it clear in a similar way?
I'm not saying we'll get a "Darius, look, you're a great guy and I like you. But I just don't like like you." But possibly something similar.
10. What? You've never seen a ghost before?
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We'll see if this turns out to be another 'back from the dead' moment or not, but it has that kind of vibe to me. And I have to credit @p0m0u for pointing it out to me originally. Fingers crossed, it seems like a perfect setup for Ben's line to make a comeback!
And I think that's everything for now!
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iridescentmirrorsgenshin · 3 months ago
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hi! love love love all of your haikaveh analyses! they're so wonderfully done and itch my brain so right. i was wondering if you had any thoughts on the recent quest featuring them ('an odd textual mystery')? hope you have a wonderful day!
hiya! firstly, thank you so much for your ask! i'm so glad you enjoy my haikaveh analyses!?? they truly live in our heads <333 secondly i am so sorry this reply is coming late!! i wasn't able to play during the first half of the event, and then i've had technical difficulties, so i've only recently finished the quest! that being said, here is part one of two of my thoughts!
firstly, i love how this event feels like a reference to kaveh’s hangout, in which alhaitham says that kaveh’s annotations, according to the ex grand conservator, are too long and hard to read, and that as a student, kaveh had the habit of scribbling in all sorts of books, which won him the nickname “the urchin of Kshahrewar” ???
we're starting off strong with kaveh canonically hiding behind a ladder out of sheer embarrassment after trying to find the book on which he inadvertently founded a conspiracy. things will just never go his way huh :(
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i thought it was interesting (and very deliberate) that when we go to where we would find kaveh, it's The House, and when the traveller and paimon believe they've heard kaveh-
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it's this guy... homosexual jumpscare next time.... and then he says this phrase (before leaving in his typical manner, which parallels his 'see ya' in his character quest, plsss he's so !?!?!?)
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after waiting again, the traveller and paimon believe theyve heard kaveh, and this time it IS kaveh... you mean they couldnt be told apart...?? really leaning into alhaitham and kaveh being innately bound by the mirror motif i think.!!
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paimon then impersonates alhaitham, to which kaveh recognises, saying that paimon doesn't sound herself - which could parallel how the kaveh comments that the traveller sounds like alhaitham in one dialogue option within his hangout, a cute detail <3
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also, kaveh clinging onto the narrative that no one knows he lives with alhaitham, and then listing a scroll of names, being all of his and alhaitham's close friends... ironically very intimate
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also it being confirmed that kaveh has low stamina, i didn't know i needed this until i was given it
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kaveh drunkenly circling a spelling error in permanent ink, thinking nothing about it but that the book is terrible, returning it, and then creating a city-wide mystery, believing it to have happened AFTER he returned the book, and frantically trying to piece together what happened is so kaveh coded, ofc it WOULD happen to him
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tighnari checking the book out when kaveh complained about it him because he thought it sounded FUNNY!! i love hibm..,m,,,
also kaveh using red ink and alhaitham using green ink... oh so the contrasting outfits aren't enough, you're also canonically using complementary colours... oh so.. huh...
tighnari immediately clocking that alhaitham joined in by adding a circle, calling it a 'game', so he knows that alhaitham is having fun doing this...? dare i say... f-flirting,,,
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tighnari saying flirting.!! HE DESERVEDLY CALLEDHAIKAVEH OUT!!! they are too much in their intricate (homoerotic) rituals.
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tighnari using a leaf in the forest metaphor... very interesting
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cutting to cyno and sethos, cyno being bitter that sethos makes excuses to not play TCG, referencing their voice lines about the other, this is such a nice detail
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absolutely no thoughts here just pure homoerotic brainrot of knowing what style of ink and the penmanship of your life partner, along with an unnecessary specific memory of the two taking breaks from their schedules to spend time together in their secret spot in the tree in cyno's second story quest... ive not had one coherent thought since this, the writing for cynonari is so so great and lovely and everything, they deserve the best
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"back to the book" BRO GOT DISTRACTED!!! FR THERE WAS NO NEED TO TELL THAT STORY ABOUT HIM WATCHING TIGHNARI DO HIS HOMEWORK IN THEIR SECRET PLACE HELPPPPPP
also, cyno wanting to solve the mystery of the book for tighnari's sake and protection. oh. (if this weren't haikaveh's fault/event then cynonari would own it... tighnari, i, too, am so tired of them.)
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and cyno canonically calling sethos bro!! another reason as to why its a crime this mini quest wasn't VOICED????
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this is part one! part two is here and focusses on the final scene with alhaitham and kaveh, my bane...
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serpentarii · 2 months ago
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M O R D L U S T ; september 22nd, 2024
finally getting around to doing these more often now that i'm making money moves in the draft (this is a lie, i am making moves into my friends' dms to scream) so that means i have an excuse to make self-indulgent WIP edits.
my primary protagonist vératre, formerly known as voir, has been made sufficiently weird, and i think i've found a way to smoothly integrate all of the new scenes i added when i reformatted her half of the plot.
i've also been in my overthinking era to make sure that everything from color symbolism, animal motifs, to the specific variations of words characters use has a purpose. 90% of it will not be apparent in the actual draft so, to paraphrase myself, i'm like gay sisyphus opening and closing notion.
but, i do plan on making some character aesthetic intros, tv show edits, and finally getting around to that animal symbolism post 🐯
transcript below the cut:
Pale blue light flooded into the crate as the lid was pried off, then abruptly overturned, sending Aleksander tumbling out between a set of familiar armchairs. His attention traveled up the front of a familiar desk and landed at an unsmiling familiar face.  Sitting quietly on the other side of the desk was Lady Kos, regal as a queen and ten times wealthier, with pearl droplets woven into her dark braids, dressed in chiffon and lace from trailing hem to high, starched collar.  She was melting wax, her movements swift and assured as she poured a small pool onto the folds of an envelope and stamped it with a sigil Aleksander knew to dread. She took a sip of riesling, soundlessly replacing her glass onto the wood, before setting her sights on him.  “Herr Aleksander Fox,” she said at last. 
and since i haven't done this in like 4 years, surprise bitch. i'm doing a novel prep tag in here now.
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first look ;
describe your novel in 1-2 sentences (elevator pitch) ;
a businessman-turned-thief finds himself entangled with a pair of opposing assassins and the roles they unknowingly play in a much grander conspiracy.
how long do you plan for your novel to be (novella, standalone, series, etc.)? ;
a standalone, thank god. the technically term would be roman fleuve, since i am planning future standalone works that take place within the same universe.
what is your novel’s aesthetic? ;
ancient buildings overtaken by nature, cemeteries at midnight, poisonous flowers, venomous snakes, whispering in shadowy alcoves, masquerade balls, bloodstained feathers, veiled truths
what other stories inspire your novel? ;
the his dark materials series by philip pullman, uprooted by naomi novik, classic gothic lit, fairy tales in general, and uh,,,,,,,exodus.
share 3+ images that give a feel for your novel ;
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main character ;
who is your protagonist? ;
my two main protagonists/POVs are liferuiner and wannabe businessman aleksander fox, and vératre, a notorious poisoner struggling her way through a quarter-life crisis.
who is their closest ally? ;
aleksander's closest ally, at least in the beginning, is his friend heidi, an information broker with a secret :) and vératre begrudgingly accepts the help of salicaire, another assassin, since they are both nosy and want answers.
who is their enemy? ;
aleksander vs. the ospirin family (a fight he is nawt winning) and the church
what do they want more than anything? ;
so, to be cryptic, 3/4 of the leads in mordlust are all reflections of each other, what they could have been and what they want to be. the last of them is the mirror. they see in him what they want to see. and what they want, shockingly, is prestige, power, belonging, etc. they've always felt like strangers in their own skin and will go to terrible lengths to fit themselves into a society that was not made for them.
why can’t they have it? ;
dirty dirty politics for which they are mere pawns ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
what do they wrongly believe about themselves? ;
that because they've been hurt, they are justified in hurting others in pursuit of their goals.
draw your protagonist! (or share a description) ;
aleksander is a classic dandy with a hyperfixation on his vintage fox fur coat, which he wears even when it's wildly out of season and out of fashion because it's the nicest thing he owns. he's also usually seen wearing kid leather gloves and a golden cravat pin he received from his patroness. he's got green eyes, short auburn hair, lots of freckles, and more people would find him handsome if he didn't smile like he knew your fly was down and was refusing to tell you.
vératre's lips are stained purple due to. reasons. and so she wears a veil, which is not uncommon for particularly devout women. she has medium length brown hair she keeps pinned up into tight plaits and a notably long neck. also, she has pretty privilege because shits fucked and having attractive lay servants representing the house/church is common practice. since she works as a kitchen maid most of the week, she's often wearing her uniform w/ an apron. and sometimes she wears isme's black feathered cloak.
drawing wise, i do have this chart, courtesy of alex @bitethebard:
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plot points ;
what is the internal conflict? ;
aleksander and vératre, being parallels of each other, have somewhat similar internal conflicts. they both came from nameless villages out in the countryside and share a burning desire to be more. in vératre's case it's v much a "be careful what you wish for" situation, because in receiving everything she thought she wanted she's no longer herself and unhappier than ever. aleksander is younger and earlier along in his journey, but barreling down the same path. except the choices he makes fucks shit up for the people around him more than they effect himself.
what is the external conflict? ;
again, cutthroat politics (literally). everyone has something they'd kill for.
what is the worst thing that could happen to your protagonist? ;
other than dying horribly, probably being tethered to an uncaring master, praying to uncaring gods, and trying to find comfort in an uncaring church for the rest of their miserable lives.
what secret will be revealed that changes the course of the story? ;
aleksander is entangled in a pseudo-liar revealed plot, which i kinda hate, but as an extremely unreliable narrator his priorities are not in proper order... vératre is witnessing the horrors.
do you know how it ends? ;
yeah
bits & bobs ;
what is the theme? ;
blind faith is dangerous. you must learn to take responsibility for both the good and the bad actions you take, and attaching yourself to someone or something at random to validate your own existence isn't healthy. holiness exists not only in gods but in small moments of happiness and in the people we love. and lastly don't fucking steal someone's skin and sell it on the black market.
what is a recurring symbol? ;
thorns.
where is the story set? (share a description!) ;
niederbrinn, the capital city of falkenreik, which is loosely inspired by pre-german empire prussia. it's filled with tons of gothic™ architecture and fun locations like cathedrals, catacombs, and creature shops. it's situated closer to the malevolent eldritch forest than most would like.
do you have any images or scenes in your mind already? ;
hell yeah
what excited you about this story? ;
mostly isme. and then the other 3 protags ig 🙄
tell us about your usual writing method! ;
these days, i usually write a rough outline and expand it using the snowflake method, incorporating ideas, themes, and worldbuilding along the way. then i make a proper outline where i figure out chapters, acts, the dreaded midpoint, etc. i don't write in chronological order so this helps a ton with out-of-context lines since i have a reference for where i want them based on the location/emotional state of the characters. getting myself to actually sit down and WRITE the damn thing is the problem, shout out to my fellow procrastinating perfectionists <33
if you made it to this point you are sexy and i love you, byeeee !!
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laurentidal · 3 months ago
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Ice Core Report ❄️ August 2024
Decided to do a little editorial check in at the end of each month. Most of you probably don't know that, while Lauren is my real first name, that my blog is actually named for a massive ice sheet that once lay over the place where I live (the Laurentide Ice Sheet). Thus, this is a report from my ice core.
#1 Story: Suggestion Box
This one was a huge surprise for me. It took off immediately, and I had not seen that coming. I'd had this image saved in my "had potential" folder for probably three weeks before I decided on how to tell the story. It went through an iteration where this was an ice skating rink, then it was a sandwich shop. I think one draft had a "five dollar footlong" joke in it. But ultimately I liked "arcade" the best.
#2 Story: Enjoy Your Stay
This was based on fun joking conversation I had with @hypno-potion and as the scaffolding we were joking about kept getting more elaborate I was like "No there is definitely something here." I'm glad you all agreed.
#3 Story: Kitty Pet Saga
I saw this picture and immediately knew what the story was going to be. Sometimes I see an image and think "There's something here if I look hard enough" and sometimes I see an image and a fully formed idea just jumps right out of it.
#4 Story: Oh My
This is a story I actually wrote quite some time ago for an old defunct website that never really got any foot traffic. I'm glad I brought it over, because it's one of my personal favorites. The only fauxcest story in the top five this month. That's one of those kinks I think I'm just going to have to accept that you guys aren't as into as I am (and I have the data to validate that claim).
#5 Story: Daughters and Suns
The only true repost from my old blog and the only part of a series in the top five this month. This series is my favorite thing I'm writing right now (though this entry isn't my favorite in the series). There's a lot more coming so I hope you're enjoying as much as I am.
Sunda Systems
We're half way through Season 1 of my Sunda Systems investigative mind control conspiracy story. Our investigator has made several contacts and visited the campus first-hand. She also might be starting to feel some effects from her various encounters, and her keen eye for detail is missing a few clues that are staring her right in the face. But I'm sure the date she's got lined up will give her some much needed relaxation.
Please please please share this story and feel free to get interactive with it! I've put some real effort into it and I've never written such a slow burn before. I'm enjoying the ride, and I've got some GOOD (I think) twists and turns coming. I think this format could be fun to play around with as an audience. Post your theories! I love seeing that folks are engaging with more than just the like button.
Update of Magics & Mesmerism
Some of you are aware that I'm working on an erotic mind control TTRPG called Magics & Mesmerism. I'm still plugging away. As we speak, I'm writing skills for the Innovator character class. As a treat, I'd like to share with you an except from the page on Hypnotic Foci:
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General Thoughts
Every story in the top five this month is a FEMALE SUB story. Noted. I tend to favor that in my writing, too, which is interesting because I think Female Over Male stories are hotter, probably because of the subversion of expectations. I'm a slut for subversion of expectations.
I think that's everything. Love you all and I'm very excited for you to see what's coming in September. One of my favorites that I wrote comes out tomorrow, and on the 13th you'll be introduced to your first Force of Nature.
Till then, keep reading, keep messaging, keep asking, and if you're feeling generous, keep donating.
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kamenstranger · 22 days ago
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A review(?) of Dandadan
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Starting these reviews off is always the hardest part, but it often comes to me after some time filling out the rest of the article. Dandadan has been stubborn in that regard, so much so I've been trying to figure out where to start with this series since it first came out.
I began reading DDD before tankōbon's were being printed, hell before it even made it to NA digitally (There were translations in Europe which got them early iirc.) Then batches starting coming out, and I still have those original single chapters from Sept. 5 '21
I became captivated, but, like its namesake, describing why I enjoy DDD is daunting in how esoteric it all is.
The general plot is straightforward on its own: Momo Ayase, the granddaughter of a spirit medium, though circumstance meets with an occult obsessed otaku, Ken Takakura, and, yes, he's named after exactly who you think, which drives the Takakura obsessed Momo nuts. She calls him Okarun, which I will also be doing for the rest of this.
Okarun's big obsession is UFOs and aliens, which he believes in, but not ghosts. You see where this is going. Hi-jinks ensue, both go to hot spots for each others interest and what do you know, Momo gets abducted by Aliens and Okarun is possessed by a geriatric genital biting speed demon.
Feel free to re-read that last part a few times.
Suffice to say, Dandadan gets fucking nuts almost as soon as the first chapter, but we're not even close to how off the rails this series gets.
I'll save you the details of how they deal with the Turbo Granny, but I will say the mythos and rules surrounding the various spirits, urban legends, cryptids and aliens is handled with a shocking amount of intricate care. If you're like me, you grew up surrounded by a plethora of Unsolved Mysteries, caught UFO Files as it was airing, maybe you even had some of those Forbidden World books laying around from the 80s before getting into stuff like Yokai. Even though I don't really engage with that sorta thing outside Weird NJ nowadays (It stops being fun when people in public office are into conspiracies-- particularly of the nazi variety like lizard men and flat earth)
The narrative and aesthetic appeal of them has stuck with me.
Anyone that's read my Kamen Rider reviews would know how much of a sucker I am for that quintessential cryptid look, which Dandadan has plenty of along with just being absurdly unhinged and hilarious.
The first two volumes do a fantastic job setting up the limitations and powers of spirits in particular, eventually resulting in part of Turbo Granny's soul being trapped in a Meneki Neko and leaving her speed abilities with Okarun. Unfortunately, Okarun only got 1/3 of his bits back.
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So now have two super powered protagonists touched by the supernatural and the unearthly on the search for…missing nuts. Or I guess testicles that look like magic golden orbs of power. That's seriously how we're kicking this off.
And yes, there is a basis for that in mythology called Kintama. If you're familiar with Gintama you probably knew that.
But beyond that basic set up… where the fuck do I even go from there? The series is far more than OTT action and good monster lore, but it's also hard to delve into the how and why of its overall qualities. Sure The supernatural and sci-fi bits are fantastic, and the comedy is wonderful, but it's a by product of the real core of Dandadan: the interpersonal relationships of the characters. Surprise.
Which yeah, if it wasn't clear from the get go, DDD has a romantic angle between Okarun and Momo.
Under the monsters, dick jokes, and the completely unhinged nature of everyone and everything is an oddly captivating and flat out adorable love story between our two leads, one that slowly unfolds but is challenged by the various shake ups from monsters, invaders and cast additions that occur to hinder that development; or in some cases push it further by bringing the two closer.
Okarun in particular very well might be one of my favorite interpretations of the Otaku with a heart of gold. He's a legitimately sweet person, cares for people, he trains his ass off to earn mastery over his powers to make things easier on Momo and to keep up with the ever increasing threats they face. In a sea of otaku power fantasy characters, it's nice to be reminded that characters with limitations and weaknesses to be overcome or dealt with are still showing up.
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He's also just a total sweetheart to Momo.
And it's pretty clear even early on that the feeling is mutual. Momo is easily flustered whenever a cute girl gets a little too chummy with Okarun, or strings him along. She even retaliates in some cases.
Momo is also about as dorky as Okarun (As seen above) just in different ways, which makes the two complement one another while also contrasting in how much of a hot head Momo can be.
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For a series that gets as bonkers as DDD, Momo's grade A shit talking "too stubborn to admit her feelings" gruff Gyaru personality helps ground the series with a rather realistic portrayal of a girl her age-- albeit one with psychic abilities and goes through some extreme struggles much later in the series.
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In fact one of the more overlooked aspects whenever I read about Dandadan is how surprisingly dark the chapters start to get in the 80s onward. Because despite the major kick off involving Okarun having his balls stolen, the series is capable of being very sardonic.
For all the absurd fun like giant enemy crabs or the Flatwoods monster as a Sumowrestler, and even a daikaiju way later, you also have things like human sacrifices and tragic ghost stories which are treated with a heavy tone that is never undermined by that off-kilter comedy. You even see tones of that with Turbo Granny of all things, involving the trapped spirits of butchered girls.
Don't misunderstand, however, the series is first and foremost a romcom with horror elements, but sometimes the horror shines through in surprising ways. That nuance is also seen in the rest of the cast, which I've yet to talk about much because one of the biggest challenges of this whole thing is figuring out how.
Talking about Dandadan beyond the very bare basics of the opening chapters is difficult without spoiling something, it's part why I was hesitant to review it back when I first started reading, despite how enamored I was. For one thing, focusing on any one aspect would be a gross oversimplification, doing a disservice to how each angle of the series is handled. Conversely, delving into Dandadan as whole would mean recapping the story arcs and events because Dandadan has some of the most tightly woven threads I have seen in some time. I can barely graze the surface of why character dynamics work or are unique before inevitably getting into a full blown synopsis and spoiling character arcs and entire narrative structures, which is… frustrating, to say the least.
For example, I can't really give you a good look at Aira Shiratori without getting deep into how she's a schoolmate of Momo and Okarun, gets into a rivalry with Momo because Aira thinks she's a demon while viewing herself as "The special one"; a delusion made stronger when she gains her own demonic powers which is basically Sedusa. But over time she forms a bizarre friendship with the two over their trial and tribulations, while also dealing with the massive weight of guilt over cruel rumors she spread about Momo. But that really doesn't even begin to tell you how much of an absolute fucking perfect little bitch she is, and yet what an enjoyable dork she becomes. To do so would be to just tell you everything that happens in her story, which, while not complicated, is tied heavily into the narrative.
It's a similar scenario with Jin "JiJi" Enjoji, Momo's first crush, which you can imagine the upset that causes; one that's pretty goddamn funny because the dude, while handsome, athletically fit and arguably the strongest of the entire cast, has the personality of a goddamn muppet. So Okarun's getting all strung up on a guy even more goofy than him.
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In a nice subversion, his relationship with Okarun develops into something surprisingly positive pretty quickly, if not without complications due to a fairly dark story with his character, which pushes Okarun even further in his training after Jin gets his own possession. And it also makes it all the more hilarious that the chipper muppet baby has a secondary Shadow the Hedgehog cracked to 11 persona that's a legit threat.
Then there's Kinta "Kinny" Sakata who is basically if Okarun was even more socially inept and a dipshit Gunpla addict who tried really hard to be a Jojo. His strengths is a vast knowledge of sci-fi tech and a chuuni like ability to imagine entire fantastical constructs; quite handy when mind reading alien nano machines enter the picture. It also helps break up the monotony of everyone else having or developing some sorta supernatural power.
And then we have Vamola, a character I literally cannot say a single thing about without giving away massive plot points. I can't even show a photo because her design itself contains spoilers. Just know that her story is when shit really hits the fan and will be a gut wrenching read while also having the most Battle Manga goodness.
What I can at least tell you is that for as much as Momo and Okarun are the main protagonists, Jin and Aira get damn good focus and are fully formed characters in their own right, they're not just a monkey-wrench thrown into the fray. I mean, they are also that, but they add to those elements while being more than a foil to our main heroes developing relationship, making the story much more varied and expansive than a supernatural will/won't they. Vamola especially in that area.
If there's one takeaway from this it's that Yukinobu Tatsu is capable of creating a great, varied cast full of humor and impeccable chemistry. (not to mention a lot of cheescake that shouldn't work as often as it does.) I'm constantly surprised with how masterful all the different pieces come together to create a compelling dynamic in this deranged Sci-Fi, Supernatural comedy mishmash. Hopefully I can convey a little bit of that Dada-esque appeal despite my spoiler aversion.
What's a lot easier for me to get across without spoilers, however, is the drop-dead gorgeous artwork. Good god is this series beautiful to look at.
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Tatsu has a backround in, uh, backgrounds, and it shows on just about every page. Any one side panel has more detail than most double-page fight spreads in other books, and when they do a splash page it is breathtaking.
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The fact this is a Weekly series is goddamn insane and… honestly kinda makes me a lowkey worried about their work ethic. But a lot of panels feature just the character on simple stark backgrounds (And some pages feel a little heavy on the reference material, if you get my meaning.) But even so, it's hardly a sacrifice for the impressive amount of work that goes into each chapter and how just about every other page has at least one impressive environment to gawk at.
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Not only is the detail impeccable, but the layout, timing and expressions are goddamn phenomenal and a big part of making the series legitimately funny. That same talent translates seamlessly to high energy fights and impactful creepy moments.
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This truly is one of the most compelling reasons to read the manga. At the time of this writing we're 5 episodes in the Science Saru anime and I want to make clear I'm enjoying it and do highly suggest watching it. I think their high octane stylistic approach is, in many ways, perfect for the series. There's clearly a lot of love put into translating page to screen best they can. Realistically, I know there's no way you could completely capture Tatsu's style 1:1, especially with what the industry is nowadays. The budget and man power it would take for that wouldn't be worth it.
But that sense of scope, scale, the depth, shading and a ton of small eccentricities is something unique to the manga and a big part of why it works. If you only know the anime then I think you're missing out. Plus you've got 8 volumes to read up on.
But also still watch the anime, I'd love a season 2. Hopefully with a bigger budget. Frankly, they're gonna need it.
That said, while I have praised and gassed up Dandadan, I should mention it has a number of trappings that by all means should not fly with me. As previously stated, there's a lot of cheesecake, and I like cheesecake, but it can bog down stories like this and they're a dime a dozen in the manga and anime world. At first glance DDD can look like that from the outside. There are so many instances of things that are annoying in other works, schlocky things (derogatory) that are sell themselves only on the limp-dicked exploitive elements like Fan service. Make no mistake, Dandadan is schlocky (complimentary) but it's also incredibly endearing not only outside those aspects, but in them. At least for the most part. I have to imagine it's aware of the more stupid indulgent elements but wisely plays them straight while at the same time employing a cleverness many other series fail to have.
For example, the characters are comically stripped very frequently, even (and usually) during otherwise semi-serious moments like battles (although not if the stakes are dire.)
But the cheescake is always balanced out by the other qualities. Hell, the cheesecake is often imbued a certain charm that is funny in itself or oddly sweet, which certainly becomes more true in the later chapters. Think more Cutie Honey and less Highschool of the Dead in terms of how it's handled.
A big hand in that is they're not afraid to get silly with all the characters, especially the girls, so it typically feels more tee-hee fun. They're almost if not equally goofy in their own ways and that does a lot in keeping it from being obnoxious. And ya know, they also have real developed personalities and relationships outside just having their clothes blasted off, which also happens to Okarun if that wasn't clear. Actually it's worse because he usually loses everything, and the same is also true for Jin.
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It's so audacious in every aspect that I simply can't fault it. I mean, I also wouldn't fault anyone not gelling with it, but I just sorta expect it and roll with it for a series this absurd. I'm a critic, not a goddamn puritan. I know exactly what it is, and it's doing it far better than most. It is, at worst, background noise.
That's not to say the series handles all of its exploitative elements well. Rather infamously the first chapter has an almost not quite sexual assault for Momo. It's… not as bad as it sounds-- in part because it doesn't happen and also the situation is so absurd. Honestly I think there's been a bit much blown out of proportion with it. Still, the over the top nature of an Alien with a metal syringe dick getting his comeuppance by having it bitten off by a granny speed-demon can only mitigate the general grossness of the implication so much and I still wince at it. It's the only part of Dandadan that dips into a level a cheapness it otherwise sidesteps in most other endeavors. Thankfully, it happens early on, but it also isn't a great first impression, especially if you didn't have more chapters or episodes to view at the time, leaving you to wonder just what the hell kinda story this is.
It's worth noting some of the other early chapters have bumps here and there, but nothing quite on the level of chapter 1, and those parts are ironed out overtime to be a lot more palatable. Compare how chapter 3 handles T&A to chapter 26 and you'll know what I mean.
Aside from that, however, there is at least one semi major stigma I have against Dadadan's otherwise enjoyable self indulgent nature, which is that a lot of the monster designs are painfully derivative. And I mean DERIVATIVE. Just about every alien creature in this series is an Ultra Kaiju.
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Oh Shin Godzilla in the case of Nessie.
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And, look, I get homaging stuff you like. Dr. Slump has loads of references, Patlabor has references to Ultraseven, depending on which version of Urusei Yatsura you're looking at it's loaded with them, Project A-KO has them, Eva is a love letter to Jissouji Ultra (along with flat out copying a few fights from various 70s mecha anime) and even something like Bocchi The Rock is at least a quarter references. References are not the problem. Well, maybe a little, but I'm not gonna get Orson Wells on you here.
Regardless, its hard not to think that maybe they could've dialed it back a little bit.
The Z'gok in Gundam is based on Alien Zarabe but it's doesn't look like a knock-off version of it. But the Dover Demon in Dandadan looks like "original the character" Kanegon that turns into Baltan. Because it is.
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Like come on, man. Even the Space Pirates in Metroid aren't this blatant.
Why this sticks out to much is because the art is so damn impressive but the design aspect is lacking in certain areas. I'm willing to give leeway for some designs if they're based on folklore elements like Ghosts, Yokai, and crypids. You want to make them recognizable, but can still work in cute references or original ideas without being as glaring as "we have Ultra Seijin at home." For what it's worth, I guess Dada knockoffs with Pegassa eyes are better than generic greys. But while it's cute at first, I felt it got irksome by the time I saw Shin Godzilla… and then Hipporit as a subterranean shows up. Then a tail-less xenomorph. And Alien Guts, and a Metal Gear, and Elecking, even an Alien Zarabe.
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A lot of those do end up as cannon fodder so I can understand not wanting to put a lot of work into stuff that ends up being one offs. I can't deny the art looks incredible and hype as fuck. But man, it gets distracting sometimes, especially when Gomora shows up at one point with the body of Red King and later on they end up making that a major deity in an alien culture. It's not played as a joke at all. It is one of the most dead serious chapters… But it's still just an Ultra Kaiju. Sometimes I'm reading Dandadan and I'm having a great time and I'm getting all the referential designs, and I don't *hate* this, but in the back of my head all I can think of is that line in Akibaranger.
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And on some level I do get how that borderline level of infringement adds to the absurdity, how the near mono focus of a singular love for Tsuburaya is charming. Hell, it's even refreshing in some ways considering how that hasn't really been a thing in Japan since the 80s. But it does still get a bit much from the sheer volume.
I think on some level Tatsu knows this because in the more recent chapters the Serpo Aliens are primarily depicted in their disguised forms and the fake Gomora gets a slight redesign in later appearances that's a lot more generic. I sort of get the impression things that were maybe meant to be one off gags ended up becoming reoccurring elements, but given the tone and humor of the series that's really hard to tell, for better or worse.
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Although kudos to Science Saru saying fuck it and making the opening to the anime one big Ultraman reference. They know what they're doing.
All that said... I don't really know where to lead off from here. Dandadan is still ongoing, currently at about 170 chapters in Japan, while the anime is still currently airing the first season. So I can't really give a full review of either. Likewise, for all I know the series could go completely off the rails at some point-- in a bad way, I mean.
As it stands I'm still finding enjoyment out of this series and now seems good a time as any to suggest everyone check it out. There's multiple manga out, it's easily available digitally, there's the anime across multiple platforms in NA, we've got figuarts coming out. It's good to see.
I was long over due for look since first reading those Glitter screen-grabs some years back.
Funny enough, this late August I visited my Girlfriend in Illinois and got to see 8 volumes of Dandadan on the shelf in a comic shop, that was a nice surreal experience for something that wasn't even available digitally in NA when I first started reading it.
What I didn't realize at the time was when I took a photo of them on the shelf, it was September 5, three years to the day I got the first few chapters. So yeah, it was time for this to happen.
Given the on going status of DDD, I'll certainly be revisiting the series for a future look at and proper review. Until then, I encourage you to read the manga and see if you see what I see. It might not be some super deep narrative, but it is most certainly unique and well worth your time.
As always, thanks for reading.
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lemon-natalia · 5 months ago
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Nona the Ninth Reaction - John 3:20
message now reads: THE/TOWER/HAS/REACT’
with the whole using the nuke-as-leverage things are going off the rails for these guys very quickly. i know they're all 'we're not actually going to use the nuke' now, but i doubt that's gonna last for long
its less obvious given how much of these chapters are set in a world so much like the present-day vs the unfamiliar world of the Houses, but with how desperate everyone is to get off planet, things already seem pretty post-apocalyptic and on the brink already even without the later nuclear disaster that fully wipes everything out
and rich people are lying to save their own skin. why am i not surprised 
on one hand, its not like the whole ‘reasonable scientist’ approach was working, but i’m also not sure doing the complete opposite and leaning into the whole cult thing is going to work either, feels more like a ‘fuck you’ than a well-thought out plan
‘they want the magic bullet. they just want to be saved’ even so i can’t help but think that it’s going to be slightly more effective to tell people wild conspiracy theories and what they want to hear than actual science 
honestly it’s kind of strange to picture John, with his whole plain-black-and-bone-flower-crown look wearing capes and eyeliner while essentially becoming a conspiracy theorist online via internet streaming 
also interesting that John tried to come up with the word ‘phthinergy’ early on, which is very similar-sounding to the concepts of ‘thalergy’ and ‘thanergy’ that do ultimately end up being used
‘And I said, I’m a necromancer’ this book has placed a lot of focus on the variety of names for adepts and their meanings, ‘necromancer’, ‘zombie’ etc. and it feels very significant and a bit of a turning point for John to be fully embracing that for the first time 
also i googled ‘pthinergy’ because i go full conspiracy theorist mode in trying to work out the references in these books sometimes, and someone has made a whole website called ‘Join the Jult’. i’m crying this is so fucking funny 
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gale-gentlepenguin · 4 months ago
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Gale’s Top 10: Most Hated characters
Rules:
1. To make this interesting, I’m going to be picking characters that aren’t intended by the writers to be hated (annoying maybe, but not hated). So Villains aren’t going to be on this list since most are often supposed to be hated.
2. I will be covering Anime, manga, cartoons, and comics
3. Only content I’ve heard of (and at least somewhat have exposure to)
4. This is a VERY personal list. And If you happen to like a character I list. If it’s below the top 5, that’s fine. But if it’s above the top 5, please seek professional help.
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10. Z from All Grown Up!
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This is supposed to be a 10 year old kid. I kid you not.
When he was first introduced, I did figure it was the simple don’t judge a book by its cover story. And yea it was mid back then. But I remember watching more episodes and realizing. Z is actually really f***ing boring and the episode about not judging would have worked if they were all 14 or 15, but Z is 10! They are all 9 to 11 years old! This show was so dumb! What parent lets their kid dye their hair and get piercings at 10?! How would he even know what punk is?
I think my main problem with Z is really the fact that it shows how he doesn’t really fit in a story of 10 year olds. Which was one of the big problems with All grown up! As a show. And personally I hate being reminded of why it fails so much as I did enjoy it as a kid.
Though out of all the characters on this list. He at least isn’t a jerk.
The other reason was I am a Tommy and Kimi supporter so…. Yea. That too.
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9. Ronaldo- Steven Universe
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Now I know he’s supposed to be annoying. But that’s not my problem with him. His obsession with keeping beach city weird is fine. It’s the entitlement he has.
Not the conspiracy theories, it’s him trying to insert himself into it, trying to be the main character. And it’s always causing trouble for Steven. But I really think what does it is just how selfish he is about it. He never learns, starts to consider other people’s feelings. For Steven Universe, a show that gives pretty much everyone a redemption arc, Ronaldo basically goes “nah I’m good as is.” That’s what really grinds my gears about it.
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8. Chloe Carmichael from Fairly Oddparents
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Now I should stress that before her introduction. The show was already on a decline with the introduction of Poof, Foop, Sparky.
But Chloe, oh she was a different breed of ruining the show. She made it unwatchable. Like people often complain about Mary Sue characters. CHLOE is a 100% grade A Mary Sue.
She just shows up, gets partial custody of the fairies, everyone likes her, but she somehow a bit miserable so she gets to have faries? Chester is WAY more deserving.
But seriously everything around her seemed to bend to her will. And it was so bad I think they canceled the show midway through the season.
But the reason she is so low is because she was simply the last straw on the shows decline and not the root cause. And I hardly watched the season she was in to care enough.
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7. Hiruzan Sarutobi - Naruto Shippuden
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Now for those of you who watched only the first part of Naruto you are probably VERY confused on why this old man is on the list.
For those of you who have watched part 2. You know EXACTLY why he is on this list.
This man’s inability to stop ANY of the awful crap that resulted in the events of the story.
-He let the Uchiha extermination happen
-He let Danzo basically do whatever he wanted
-He didn’t stop Orochimaru who ended up attacking his village years later (and resulting in his death)
-Never told Naruto about his parents, and Litterally just gave the orphan money and dipped out.
-Didn’t stop the village from ostracizing Naruto
And the list goes on.
Like for some things, I get. The uchiha were planning a Coup and it could have gotten ugly but for f***s sake he could have done a better job in negotiations! Also why would he ever trust Danzo?
The rest is on him. Konohamaru is better off having Naruto as his mentor than that old bastard.
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6. Chris Thorndike - Sonic X
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I hate this f***ing kid so much.
Oh people complain that Amy is so focused on sonic. Nah man, this kid only ever thought about sonic. This kid even tried trapping Sonic in his world because he didn’t want to say goodbye.
“But he’s lonely without his parents.”
WTF you talking about. His parents see him pretty often despite their careers and both clearly love him. He also has a maid and butler that both watch over and care for him. Not to mention uncle Chuck that is watching over him. Plus he has a group of friends his own age (all of which are more interesting characters than him).
I can’t even begin to describe how much of a jerk he can be. I will say the only reason he isn’t higher is because Chris actually TRIES to be useful in the matarex arc.
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5. Velma Dinkley - Velma
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Or should I say Mindy kaling wearing Velma like a skin suit.
I hate when people turn beloved characters into self inserts and this entire show was this. Now I could go on about how they ruin Velma’s character. But this, this isn’t Velma. This isn’t even Scooby doo. It’s just using its name. And that’s all I can say. I’ve only watched enough clips to justify putting this on the list. This character and the show are both awful, so at least she isn’t ruining the show. And she does die, so at least there is some satisfaction. Which is why she is only this low on the list.
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4. Jared Shapiro - Powerpuff girls 2016
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I don’t care what the interviews say. No one can convince me this kid isn’t a self insert of one of the writers.
An out of nowhere love interest for the main character.
While not as bad as the case of Velma, this one is much more personal having grown up with the OG powerpuff girls. So this makes me want to gag.
He’s such a bland and weird character. It’s just so creepy. I can’t even begin to describe how creeped out this character makes me feel. It does not feel like him and blossom are the same age either. It just ain’t right.
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3. Caillou from Caillou
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I happen to like kids. Kids are creative and fun little gremlins. But whenever I see Caillou, the visceral urge to punt this child is intense.
He is the WORST child character in all of fiction. If the show never existed I’m 100% sure the world would be a better place.
He is a brat that NEVER learns. He says he does but he doesn’t. He is always the exact same little turd he’s always been. The only redeeming quality about that show is that the theme can be remixed into a bop.
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2. Paul Jeremiah Rabin from Amazing Spider-man
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This man is probably the most hated man in all of spider-man comics.
Zeb Wells really s*** the bed so hard when he created this guy. Making a character that basically kidnapped Mary Jane, gave her super powers, made her get into a relationship with him, and basically ruined Spider-Man’s personal life.
You want to know how bad you messed up when in the issues where spiderman was possessed by the green goblin’s evil and he wanted to kill Paul, PEOPLE WERE CHEERING.
I do not think exists a single person that Likes Paul as a character. It’s actually kind of amazing.
But he is only number 2, because the ultimate spider man run is helping us forget the TRAVESTY that is Paul.
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1. Dave from Total Drama Pahkitew Island
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He was the worst part of the worst season of total drama.
He started off as a whiny less then fun version of Noah and ended up as a clingy, psychotic toad that deserved to get ripped apart by bears.
Now with previous entrees I can kind of understand if there is someone that could like the character. Maybe…
But Dave?
If you actually like Dave and the person he became, we can not be friends. I would recommend a psych evaluation.
The boy is vindictive, controlling, condescending, and overall PATHETIC! And his label was Normal. The normal boy?! Nothing about that ‘Nice guy tm’ is normal. He was a piece of garbage.
Every action he takes is in his own self interest and I don’t see a SINGLE redeeming quality about him.
We are supposed to Want him to get together with Sky?
Him dating the Communal toilet would be a disservice to the toilet.
And that’s all I got to say on that matter.
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sout999 · 4 months ago
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adhd talk
the third truly unsung project alongside my film and dissertation was the weird amount of targeted effort i had to put into Completing Anything Big As A Neurodivergent Person Whose Brain Is A Crazy Off The Rails Train Staffed and Patronised Entirely By Multiple Exact Copies Of The Squirrel From Ice Age
which is a description like 99/100 people reading this can relate to, but i think a sentiment i see less often and therefore feel kind of stupid and stubborn and lonesome about is "adhd is innate but is also exasperated by hectic lifestyle/modern instant gratification machines so if i fix my habits around those i can cure myself forever". which is silly and wrong but also i feel abit disconnected from adhd social media culture and cant cope just relating to it (which is all it seems to be sometimes) but learning to harness or tame it to do the things that are really important to me
i felt really cringe tbh having to look up youtube videos of HARVARD STUDENT REVEALS PRO STUDY TRICK and then narrowing it down to specifically adhd-focused study videos and keeping a planner and setting aside specific time to study studying and practising anti-academic meltdown journaling techniques and reading fucking atomic habits but i really didn't want to contribute to my abhorrent academic record following me all through undergrad. in fact i wish i had done this sooner but i was not self aware enough to consider the fact
probably the best change i made was severely cutting down or being mindful of social media time, i don't backread my tl anymore and have more moments of awareness when i find myself dumbly scrolling and realize i dont want to be doing this, and then wondering what i actually Do want to be doing. i keep a book nearby to read, and have also swapped a lot of social media time to sketching-off-pinterest time. reading about the psychology behind social media apps is also super interesting, although i always feel like a paranoid wacko conspiracy theorist talking about it. stuff like how negativity and judgemental behaviour is good for engagement (and therefore ad revenue), and how if all posts on your tl were interesting you wouldn't be as addicted to social media as you are, therefore microblogging employs a slot machine/gacha system where you "roll" for posts by logging on and hope to get a good one. it's a little full on but the more i think of it as a revolting and evil machine the more incentive i have to do something else with my time ^q^
a harder thing to do was, in the late stages of the project, the real crunch time month, avoid everything that could become a huge hyperfixation, and then eventually even minor distractions or fixations. because i know if i got super obsessed with something i'd just be up posting about it or drawing fanart. i had to bar myself from persona 3 remake and elden ring dlc and all these other shiny new releases, and the mobile games i was playing... i look forward to catching up on them now. i took up reading books a lot more because unfortunately thats just not as exciting. in the last month of film work i stopped listening to music on my computer so i wouldnt get drawing or animation ideas to distract me from film work. as of writing this i havent listened to music in like 40 days guys 😱 at the same time i am the kind of person who needs background noise to work, so i have:
watched novum's four hour hereditary video essay three times
watched novum's seven hour midsomar video essay three times
watched that one five hour bojack horseman retrospective twice
listened to audiobooks of the Britney Spears biography, Jennette McCurdy biography, three Playboy Bunny biographies (i was on some sort of lady bopgraphy kick i guess), and a few fiction books
rewatched all of bojack horseman
started on House MD and got a few seasons in before i finished the project, amazingly the perfect show to look away from bc of all the medical stuff, how many lumbar punctures do you need to show like seriously
honorable mention to the learned skill of communication and being honest and picking your battles and killing your darlings which is a larger part of managing mental illness than i cared to admit but one of the hardest ones because it involved confronting things and making big painful drastic changes and then having to tell the faculty about them. sometimes i'd be stuck on a piece of animation work for weeks/months, then go back and change the underlying idea to one i'm actually passionate about, and do the animation work in one day using newly found magical hyperfocus passion power. it's crazy! but being able to be confident about taking those steps rather than keeping on with what you're "supposed" to do went a long way.
i very much look forward to listening to a music and playing some video games properly now and being pulverized like a small victorian child from the sheer amount of fun i'm having. i'd say it was all worth it and a fun experiment in channeling the magical humours of passion and boredom and i hope it will help me with future projects too. i Am super burnt out though x__ x thanks for reading and for all your support up until now!
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dwailol · 1 year ago
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Over the Desk
ComPOUND: Round 4 of a week alone with Bucky
[f reader x Bucky] WC: 1.7k
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Summary: after round 3 your hands are still a little brush burned and you’re a little anxious about the ongoing mission. Bucky wants to treat you nice. How nice can he really be though? Especially when you’re sitting on a fucking desk!! ;)
MINORS DO NOT INTERACT 🔞
Warnings ⚠️: mentions anxiety, smut, oral (f receiving), p in v, cream 🥧
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With fresh brush burn on my hands texting is painful. I promised Wanda I would check in with her today. I had some unprovoked anxiety about a secret attack on the compound or some conspiracy plan while I’m alone here. I’m not afraid of any outside threat as much as I am about blindly destroying the building. When the flames begin, it’s almost like an out of body experience. I get focused on my opponent with no care of collateral.
The compound has entity detection systems. However, I got no notification when Bucky snuck up on me last night. While that worries me, I can’t tell anyone about Bucky and I’s situation. They might be tempted to look at the cameras…
Part of my super power maintenance is to keep a cool head and he makes it hard to do that. Our session in the training center was plenty proof. He’s still in there lifting who knows how much weight.
As I’m slowly typing my response to Wanda’s check up, she calls me. Fuck. It would be easier to text a lie than talk around it to one of the most powerful women I know. I step into an office space before answering.
“Hi dear.”
“Hey Wanda!”
“You were taking too long to respond. Is everything alright?”
“Everything is-“, Bucky walks up to stare at me through the glass door. He was shirtless and sweaty after his 3 hour long workout.
“Everything is fine. I’m just a bit tired after my training session. Need a nap.”
“Keep a cool head love. I’ll let you know once we are coming back. It looks like it might take few more days than we anticipated. Be looking for a different number because I have to ditch this burner phone.”
She hung up before the conversation could go on for too much longer. I place my phone down on the desk and give Bucky a nod of approval to come in.
“You should really use a different cellphone for calls like that. One for business and one for pleasure,” he says. He lifts me up to sit me on the desk. I look down from his intense stare. He makes me nervous sometimes.
“Y/n, I know that the nature of our relationship isn’t very roses and chocolates, but you can open up to me about your nerves whenever you feel like it. I’ve had my own struggles with snapping and coming to in a world where you’ve unknowingly hurt people even ones you care for.”
“I’ve been working on my mindfulness like Bruce thought me. I’m just afraid of being used as a weapon against my own will again.”
“No one here will make you do that. They let you stay behind for this didn’t they?”, he lifts my chin up, “You’ve got the freedom of choice now. Why you keep choosing me I’ll never know.”
“It’s because I know you get it. When you get rough with me it’s almost like practice for keeping my anxiety down. If that makes sense-“
He gives me the softest kiss he’s ever given me.
“That makes sense. I’m glad you feel comfortable with me then. No matter how intense things might get I still care for your well being.”
I grab his bare sides to pull him close. I move my hands up to his chest. He squeezes one of them softly and brings it to his face for a kiss. I move his face to mine. We press our heads together before going in for more. Our lips began to melt like butter.
He leans closer and I place my hands behind me to stabilize. The kissing starts to resemble more of mouthing. He pulls me by the hips to the edge of the desk and spreads my legs apart. He grinds himself in between my thighs. I slide back and wince from the pain of my burned hands.
His flesh hand holds me up as his cool vibranium hand massages over the rope burn. He examines the damage and red marks. His touch soothes the pain a bit. He places more gentle kisses on my palms.
“Like I said I’ll be more gentle this time.”
“You don’t have to hold back. I know how you like it.”
“I’m gonna be soft and sweet because I want to be. You deserve some soft and sweet.”
“Show me what your soft and sweet looks like then super soldier,” I gaze up at him with a subtle smile. I know there’s only so soft and sweet he can be.
Every touch from then on is a smooth glide around my body and face. The tenderness of both his hands sends chills through me. He sure was treating me like an angel. He drifts his hand to tease the inside of my thighs where I’m warm and wet.
“You like the sweet stuff too. This is all for you doll.”
He slides my shorts and panties off. He meets his face to my opening then kisses all around it. I feel myself pulse. He brings his fingers to stroke my folds before slowly inserting them. I gasp at the new feeling of gentleness. We’re usually feral by this point.
He moves his fingers as if he were calling for me to come towards him. He strokes the spot inside me that rests next to the nerves of my clit. I moan with pleasure. The sensuality of it was relaxing.
His pacing and soft licks to my pussy brings me to an orgasm. I thought that was only possible with our rough sessions.
“I want you,” I say with the purest desire in my eyes.
“Say no more angel.”
He stands up to remove his gym shorts. Just like his fingers, he slowly puts himself inside me. The feeling is heavenly for sure. I lay back on the desk as he fills me with his cock and rubs at my clit. He starts to lose himself then picks up the pace a little. I moan as he moves through me like silk.
He gives a satisfied “mmm.” He turns me horizontal on the desk so he can hop up and hover on top of me. He lifts my hips up and I wrap my legs around him.
“Tell me what you want most and I’ll do it,” he says while lightly nibbling at my ear.
“Faster,” I say with a wide mouthed gasp following. His movements lift me up. My back arches upwards towards his body with each stroke. I roll my hips with his.
“I love it when you do that. You better be careful. I don’t wanna cum too quick.”
I mindfully slow my movements. He exits out of me to kiss me all the way down to my clit. He stands back up. I think changing positions over this desk of all pieces of furniture is much needed. I roll over to put myself in a bent position.
“Bucky, I know we said soft and sweet, but I don’t want you to hold back in this position,” I give a devious smile and lip bite. He puts his cock inside me. It feels so much bigger bent over like this. He plants both hands on the desk and brings his head close to mine. I feel his length reach so deep.
“Of course angel,” just like that he pops back up. He grabs me by the hips and fucks me the way you should be fucked over a desk. I give him some loud “Oh!”s to give him the green light to really get after it. I claw my nails into the desktop.
“Touch yourself.”
He moves my hand to my clit. I can feel my next orgasm building up and I can tell it’s gonna be a big one. I start to lose my breath.
“You gonna cum for me? I wanna feel it baby. Cum for me.”
“Uh huh I’m gonna cum for you,” I’m nearly breathless. He shortens and quickens his strokes so he’s deep inside me. My hand finally gets a break. My orgasm releases all throughout my body. It felt like a never ending wave of ecstasy. The waves flow perfectly with his beat.
“Damn, angel, I can feel you still cumming on this cock. I’m well on my way.”
“Please give it to me!” I whine. I’m still going. He yells as he releases himself inside of me. He stops moving just to press into me deeper for a second. He lets out his last grunt. He twirls me around to kiss me. It was as smooth as rose petals and as sweet as chocolate.
“I should probably take a shower,” he laughs.
He’s sweatier than when he first came in that’s for sure.
“I’ll join you.”
“I’d love nothing more.”
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tom-whore-dleston · 1 year ago
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Love Changed the Minds of Pretenders
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Pairing ▹ Bucky Barnes x gn. reader
Word Count ▹ 1k
This fic contains ▹ angst, fluff, songfic, unestablished relationship, mentions of sex, mentions of Joaquin x reader, mutual ending of relationship, light beta reading (even though there are no explicit mentions of adult themes, I do not want minors or blank blogs interacting with this fic)
Summary ▹ Do you remember | The 21st night of September?
Notes ▹ I should be asleep right now because I have work at 7am but I just had a random burst of creativity and I needed to let it out. Anyways, this is my submission for @bucks-and-noble Summer Send Off. Thank you @buckets-and-trees and @sgt-seabass for creating this challenge and refueling my love for Bucky. And a special shoutout to the book club! I am so happy I met y'all and I am beyond grateful for the bond we have created 💖 Fun fact: This is my first ever Bucky fic woop woop!! Remember to reblog and comment if you enjoyed! 😊
Prompt ▹ use a lyric [from September by Earth Wind and Fire] as direct inspiration for a theme/idea
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September 21, 2022. 10:02 pm.
The night you met Bucky Barnes. 
Of all places, you met Bucky at a bar. The same bar where your friend performed their first live show and they invited you to watch. You weren’t expecting to meet anyone that night. Your heart had been broken only a few weeks prior. 
Everyone thought: Was he a rebound? A distraction?
No. He was so much more than that. It could have been easy to feel that way fresh out of heartbreak. Even more so when outsiders were constantly questioning what you and Bucky really were. But there was clearly a reason Bucky showed up in your life after this period of hurting. 
Bucky gave you love and security. He made you feel safe when he took you to the movies, when he made love to you, when you slept peacefully in his strong arms. You always thanked him for the things he did to make you feel secure and loved. He’d reply with his typical phrase, “I’m glad I make you feel that way.” 
He welcomed you into his home, his life, and his heart after many years of keeping the door locked and the key tucked away. Waking up and stroking your face before pressing a kiss to your dry lips was something that made your love for him stronger. Then after an hour or so of getting tangled between the sheets, you both would jump in the shower, gently caressing one another with soapy hands. Breakfast with Bucky was another tender ritual that you cherished. Whether it was at 10 in the morning or 1 in the afternoon, you never skipped breakfast with him.
He challenged your negative thoughts and beliefs. You and Bucky would stay on the phone until 3 in the morning talking about the universe, aliens, and other conspiracy theories. The two of you would ponder on the purpose of your lives and the ways of the universe. One thing you both were certain about was that you wanted your lives to be fulfilling and meaningful. Your world expanded and bloomed with beauty and wonder because of him. You wanted to be better and so did he.
Bucky made you believe in love again. And you made Bucky believe in love again.
As the months passed, everything was splendid. Perfect, even. But with perfection, there’s always something lacking. Of course, you wouldn’t have seen what was lacking if it slapped you in the face.
After 10 months of dating Bucky, you finally revealed your love for him. Now, Bucky wasn’t the type to say it. Heck, he didn’t even say “I love you” to his sister unless she said it first. Yet that wasn’t a deal breaker because he expressed his love in other ways. 
“I love you, too. I know your feelings for me are strong, but I don’t know if I can give you what you want.” 
It was understandable. He did mention in the beginning that he wanted to casually date. You forgot that you wanted the same thing. Man that felt like such a long time ago. Time really does fly when you start to fall in love. And hard you fell.
You hid your disappointment by making more excuses as to why being committed to Bucky would not be in the cards. First, there was the long distance. Then, there was the uncertainty about both of your futures. For a couple that talked a lot about your ambitions, you both lacked the confidence in where you would go in life. As the list of reasons piled up, there was one that made your brain fuzzy and your heart swell.
That reason was Joaquin Torres.
You met Joaquin through your cousin. There was an instant attraction between the two of you yet neither of you pursued each other. If you had gone for Joaquin, you would not have created the world you had with Bucky. So when your feelings for Joaquin grew stronger than your feelings for Bucky, you knew you had to take action before someone got hurt. 
Contrary to your belief, no one got hurt. You were transparent with Joaquin about your status with Bucky, and he understood. When you revealed to Bucky your feelings for Joaquin, he too understood. 
“Listen, angel, I know you. You know what you want in your life and you don’t let anything get in the way of that. I do love you, but who am I to stand in the way of living the life you want. You’ve let people tell you how to live your life for so long and now it’s my turn to stop that cycle. If this is what you want, don’t let me stop you.”
You and Bucky shared beautiful memories over the 10 months of being together, but the words he said to you on August 8, 2023 will always be ingrained in your brain for the rest of your life. That night was the last time you spoke to him and saw his face, even though it was over a video call.
“I’m grateful for having you in my life,” you confessed to him, trying not to cry. You couldn’t figure out if it was because you were surprised this conversation went way better than you thought or because you were saying goodbye.
Bucky grinned, “No need to get all sappy on me, angel.” You shared a final laugh together. “Well, if you ever find yourself in the city, you know where to find me.”
Part of you wanted to make a joke about how you’d run into him at the bar where you met, but you stopped yourself. Instead, you replied:
“You got it, Buck.”
And that marked the end of you and Bucky. 
You and Bucky’s love was never meant to fail. Yet it was never meant to succeed. Perhaps it was just meant to simply exist. 
But who knows, maybe that fateful night in August was not the end. Only time could tell. That was the beauty of time and the universe. You can plan and make certain choices, but ultimately, the universe will lead you to where you’re meant to be.
Now, it’s September 21, 2023. No, Bucky is not in the picture, but your thoughts are with him. 
Do you remember? Yes, you remember. You always will.
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lover-of-mine · 7 months ago
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Yk, something about my Eddie fell first essay, I never really went like "oh this is something that could be proven right by canon" mostly because when I wrote that I was still dealing with buddie being a distant possibility not something that's so close I can taste, but then Ryan was let out of interview jail. Then I went full conspiracy theorist. (Please note everything from here on out is a conspiracy theory that will most likely never be confirmed or denied so I'll live in it forever) I had made the post about how I think Ryan is playing Eddie as in love with Buck, the question was whether he was being told to do that or he was just playing it up as much as they allowed him to because we know Ryan supports the ship, and then Ryan said the "this goes beyond friendship and I love you to the core" thing.
He said he talked to someone about what it meant for Eddie to do that, because he didn't understand it at first, and then that's the conclusion he reached. But the thing is, that line "I love you to the core" specifically means so much in the context of the season, to say I love you to Buck like that in season 4 is so MONUMENTAL, that I wanna believe one of the writers straight up told him "yo this is a love confession" and explained it to him like that, and he has been playing Eddie with that line in mind ever since, and that's why he had that locked and loaded for the interview. Because, like, I, in my most normal day, am out here arguing they casted Ryan with a plan, even more considering the way Eddie was written for Ryan, they could very much have told him "look, play with the chemistry you and Oliver have, if the audience likes with might amp it up, if we're lucky we might go there someday" because you have moments in season 2, but season 2 is still very low stakes, but then when I think about the the season 3 of it all, the there's nobody in this world I trust with my son more than you, the lawsuit, and well of it all and the way they put Ryan in pr jail after Eddie begins, an episode that would retroactively be HUGE for buddie but it's pretty big for them anyway, I'm like 🤔 because we all saw Ryan talking about buddie this past month, the guy CANT SHUT UP, and if he was told something during season 3 or 4 along the line of "play it up, we are gonna fight to make this happen", putting him in pr jail would make sense, because they can't risk him saying something if they're not sure they can deliver, because how fast they dealt with Buck being bi while in a new network makes me convinced someone on fox was blocking it and nothing will convince me otherwise. But now they can, so they let Ryan run free. Because you can make a VERY strong argument that Eddie is aware of something during season 5 and 6, season 6 most of all, but you can very much make season 5 queer coded and have Eddie be like "oh I can't ignore how I feel about him anymore", because Ryan also said something about Eddie's breakdown and how that's what allowed Eddie to let Buck "know who Eddie truly is" which is interesting with the way Eddie is constructed, because if Buck is inside the last wall Eddie had up, what's actually stopping Eddie to see he's in love with Buck by the end of the season? Which would make season 6 as a pining season for Eddie make sense. Down to the way the cemetery seems to be pulling these very specific reactions from Eddie that are the same reactions we saw him have in breakups and flights with Shannon. But also things like Eddie's reaction to the lightning being something we never saw from Eddie before AND the way Oliver talked about a scene of Eddie losing his composure during in another life, not during in a flash that we didn't get to see most likely because they completely rearranged 6b because they thought they were gonna get cancelled, so they wouldn't be able to deliver what they had in mind. But now they have nothing but time, season 8 is already confirmed, and by the looks of it abc was like "go for it" with buddie in a way that fox never was, so they finally got to tell Ryan "we're doing it, go crazy" and now we are here. They could prove me right today. About Eddie not about Ryan knowing and some secret plan being in place forever. I don't think it's gonna happen. I seriously don't think it's gonna happen. I'd be more surprised to be proved right than wrong here. But the conspiracy theory is a possibility that felt very real for a second there during promo season lol
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