#it’s funny telling my siblings who are not into FOP about them

[lethality-of-dual-strike]

to the 3 people who have written (or currently writing) the Cupid/Sanderson fanfics…I love you and would kill for you

[xkuja]

1ST RULE :  tag 9 muses you would like to know better . 2ND RULE : BOLD the statements that are true for your muse .

tagged by : @kyouminaine you paranoid little thing tagging :  im siiiick ok.... ...tagging everyone who has not done it~~

MUSE :  Kuja~

FC: his delightful self ( I do have a rl faceclaim that I’ve never needed to use... you never know when you will have a fc emergency though )

OCCUPATION :  Owner of Treno’s Auction House / ‘weapons dealer’ / fop AGE :  Doesn’t age  ( 25 post game ) SEXUALITY :  Bisexual PRONOUNS :  Him / he / his / bastard

APPEARANCE :

I am 5'7" or taller

I wear glasses

I have at least one tattoo

I have at least one piercing

I have blond hair

I have brown eyes

I have short hair

My abs are at least somewhat defined

I have or have had braces

PERSONALITY :

I love meeting new people

People tell me that I’m funny

Helping others with their problems is a big priority for me

I enjoy physical challenges

I enjoy mental challenges

I’m playfully rude with people I know well ( definition of playful may vary from norm )

I started saying something ironically and now I can’t stop saying it ( theater speak )

There is something I would change about my personality ( he won’t admit what it is-- no sense in asking~ )

ABILITY :

I can sing well

I can play an instrument

I can do over 30 push-ups without stopping

I’m a fast runner ( who needs running when you can glide )

I can draw well

I have a good memory

I’m good at doing math in my head

I can hold my breath underwater for over a minute ( probably, he’s never had to try )

I have beaten at least 2 people in arm wrestling

I know how to cook at least 3 meals from scratch

I know how to throw a proper punch

HOBBIES :

I enjoy playing sports

I’m on a sports team at my school or somewhere else

I’m in an orchestra or choir at my school or somewhere else ( he is the conductor and composer of wonderful orchestrations of PAIN ) 

I have learned a new song in the past week

I work out at least once a week

I’ve gone for runs at least once a week in the warmer months

I have drawn something in the past month

I enjoy writing

I do or have done martial arts  ( he can kick if he has to, however )

EXPERIENCES:

I have had my first kiss

I have had alcohol

I have scored the winning goal in a sports game 

I have watched an entire season of a TV show in one sitting ( live opera, not tv )

I have been at an overnight event

I have been in a taxi

I have been in the hospital or ER in the past year 

I have beaten a video game in one day

I have visited another country

I have been to one of my favorite band’s concerts

RELATIONSHIPS :

I’m in a relationship  ( questionable )

I have a crush on a celebrity

I have a crush on someone I know ( questionable? )

I have been in at least 3 relationships

I have never been in a relationship

I have asked someone out or admitted my feelings to them

I get crushes easily

I have had a crush on someone for over a year

I have been in a relationship for at least a year

I have had feelings for a friend ( friends are for losers )

MY LIFE :

I have at least one person I consider a “best friend”

I live close to my school

My parents are still together

I have / had at least one sibling

I live in the United States

There is snow right now where I live

I have hung out with a friend in the past month

I have a smartphone 

I have at least 15 CD’s

I share my room with someone

RANDOM SHIT :

I have break-danced

I know a person named Jamie

I have had a teacher with a last name that’s hard to pronounce

I have dyed my hair

I’m listening to one song on repeat right now

I have punched someone in the past week

I know someone who has gone to jail

I have broken a bone

I have eaten a waffle today

I know what I want to do with my life

I speak at least 2 languages

[byleth-sensei]

Writeup: Things that interest  me about the FE3H cast pre-release - Black Eagles edition

I just want to get my thoughts and things I’m excited to see about each of the students before release!  While I’m obviously more excited about some characters than others, I actually like the entire cast; there are things that intrigue me about each one! 

Starting off with what I’m excited to see of the Black Eagles cast.

Edelgard: We all know how awesome she is!  What needs to be said? A woman who was raised to an rule an empire.  She's beautiful, fierce, and ruthless!  To me, she seems like she could be sort of a female Camus archetype of this game on the other house paths?  And I always enjoy the tragic Camus types.  Also yeah, she's poster girl, she's lovely, and there’s lots of wonderful content for her already!  I’m sure she’s got a more vulnerable side deep down, which I look forward to getting a deeper understanding of as we learn what kind of internal conflict she’s going through as heir to an empire. (I am trusting that they can pull off showing Edelgard’s softer and more vulnerable side without making her ‘weak’!) 

 Ferdinand: He's a complete dumbass redheaded fop, and I love him.  I’m not sure where all the dislike for him comes from (I didn’t read the thanibomb stuff nor do I want to, so if it’s from that I don’t know yet!). The implications of this guy's dissatisfaction with Edelgard is honestly so compelling!  I think he’s kind of going to serve as an excellent foil to Hubert’s blind loyalty. He's of a position relatively close in power to Edelgard and you just know he's got all kinds of powerful people breathing down his neck all the time about what needs to change in the government.  Every complaint about the emperor, every story of injustice at the hands of the empire is probably going to be heard by him. As a result, he knows Edelgard and the empire isn’t perfect, and that may lead to his critical feelings towards Edelgard and his sense of rivalry.  He probably gets exposed to more of the faults in the empire’s upper echelon than the other nobles. I think his feelings of rivalry towards Edelgard will be immensely entertaining.  It’s good for an effective leader to have someone at their side who can tell them when they’re doing something poorly, you know? And he certainly doesn’t seem one to hesitate.

Hubert: So I just praised Ferdinand for being critical of his leader,  now watch as I turn around and tell you what a a sucker I am for the super loyal types. This man would destroy the world for his lady's sake. I feel like he remains the most mysterious member of the Black Eagles.  He's the type who isn't going to let his true feelings be known if they get in the way of doing his job.  Still, I suspect that deep down, Edelgard as an individual is more important to him than Adrestia...something that he probably does his best to hide with austerity. (Or maybe I’m just trying too hard to see Seth/Eirika in them I don’t know!) It really makes me want to get to know him, get him to let down his shield a bit, see what he's really all about.

Dorothea: It's funny; at first I was lukewarm towards Dorothea while everyone else hailed her as a meme queen for her Jojo hat.  But she’s grown on me-- she's an uprising starlet and there's no way life is easy for her being the only commoner in a house full of Adrestian nobles. But she stays upbeat, and she's supportive and helpful even to people in other houses (That Ingrid marriage mission!)! She just seems like an all around really good, down to earth person! She also seems like a bit a of a dork deep down: ”How loud is too loud?”

Petra: I gotta feel for this girl, she's basically been offered by her own family as a symbol of fealty to a kingdom that presumably somehow seized control of her family's kingdom at some point in the past. I mean, think about how she must feel about that. She doesn't let it get her down though, she does what she has to do!  Also, nice legs nice legs I'm weak...big Lyn energy.

Caspar: Caspar seems like your typical dumb jock who guzzles protein powder, but he's also the kind of guy I can respect.  He’s noble, but he isn’t an heir; society tells him he's useless? He said FUCK THAT NOISE.  What an inspiration! He seems like he’ll be the rowdy student who you just can’t help but love. Also, his personal skill is pretty good, an evade debuff isn’t ever bad!

Linhardt: You gotta respect a man who follows his ambitions!  He knows what he likes and he sticks to it. Linhardt's 'sleeps all the time' trope sounds like it could get old fast, so I’m really hoping they don’t beat it to death and they instead show us plenty of the zany crest nerd we know him to be! Also, lazy male healer, lazy male healer! I love it when genre stereotypes are shattered.

Bernadetta:  I admit...at first I was wary of her whole ugu hikikomori angle because it made her character feel a bit too pandering and moeblob from the get-go. BUT I really warmed up to her when I saw her in the E3 treehouse gameplay. Just from her battle dialogue you can glean little bits about her character.  (The way she thought Hubert was so cool when he took out that soldier in front of her? Aww, I think she wants to mingle with her classmates! She definitely knows about and pays attention to them more than she lets on)  It’s also got to be stressful for her being the only child of a noble house -- she can’t shirk responsibility onto a sibling even if she wants to.  It’s all on her whether she likes it or not.  I have high hopes for her development over the game.

[eurydice-khthonios]

There had been a buzzing since the events with the beetles inside the palace. Lucio had Volta and Vulgora scour the entire palace, from floor to floor, with a practical legion of servants to root out the infestations. Previous holes and cracks left ignored for favour of attending to more important details were beginning to be filled in and covered up. Gardens were cut back to ensure no nests had manifested in the undergrowth. 

Eos had been avoiding Asra.

There had been a buzzing in her head. A disconnect in her head from what she wanted and what she felt. She wanted a complete separation of herself from her brother. She wanted to be someone, outside of a religion of self-important fops. Undefined by family, or other’s choices. 

She felt like her deal was slipping like sand through her fingers. Like the reminder of Hyperion was both tightening bonds and rusting chains. Gears were grinding against blockages.  

She felt a certain disgust settle in her stomach, a defiance against memory of the dead.  The feel of her heart pumping hard against her chest, of softness against her skin. She feels so much and it only ever manages to piss her off. 

So she avoids the source, and continues with the plans that had been in motion for a very, very long time. 

For the most part, she writes. Sends letters and inquiries. Travels from office to office, delivering letters to be sent and taking their replies back to be analysed. Political reputation must be up kept, but in the mean time she can use them to search for more candidates that The Devil could not find on his own. She writes to Pakra on the behalf of The Count. Inquires about the health of the Countess’ sisters, her father and mother. 

She tells them to send the letters, yet never gets replies. She wonders if the letters were ever supposed to leave Vesuvia at all. 

She does her best to avoid the source of her aggravation, but there are moments where she cannot. She still keeps her distance. 

Lucio holds a party, and she keeps to the upper balconies. Overlooks the dancing figures. Brilliant ballgowns of silky fabrics decorated with jewels and glass. Masks hide the faces but she knows them all the same. She organizes the public after all. 

Those invited to the palace celebrate, ‘ooh’ing and ‘aw’ing over the expenses put into one of Lucio’s final public events. 

The fabric around her chest is too tight, the one who made it made a mess of the measurements. That is her excuse as she watches someone with a shock of white hair hold the waist of a man who looks a little too much like Hyperion but could never be close enough to the real thing. The only person close enough to her brother was her now, and she would never let herself be known for that if she could help it. 

He looks up at the balcony and she knows he saw her watching. 

She turns away. She grabs a glass of wine. In an hour someone else takes her hand, and she leads them in a careful dance across the floor. Blending in with other dancing pairs as that same shock of white hair tries to cut across to find her. 

That is as close as she can get without a thousand lifetimes of living in other people’s shadows culminating into one moment of anger and explosion. She should not care, yet there is that disconnect that urges her to avoid it. To avoid the clashing of things that should not be meddled with.

But fate has a funny way of doing things, even as tattered as it is. 

She was organizing the packing up of Lucio’s so coveted private ball. Servants cleaned the halls, crowding them. It was hard to move through them without bumping into someone. 

It was a small task to send servants here or there, to file papers away and write letters to those who had been invited with thanks and so on. She hurried down the hallways, threading through the crowd with her papers clutched tight to her chest. There is someone walking behind her, five paces, three, two. Trying to catch up to her. She smells spice. It is warm, it smells like the wood of her aunt’s shop that she can remember from her short visits allowed by her mother when she was much, much younger. It smells like the sort of comfort that twists your stomach until you bleed, and bleed, and bleed. 

His hand lands on her shoulder. It is warm against her skin, and he pulls gently so to force her to stop and face him. Her stomach twists to knots, palpitations start in her chest. She turns quickly, expression morphing into indignant. How dare he touch her like this, how dare she react to that touch? 

“If you require something, magician, I do believe we will have to schedule an appointment rather than discuss it in the middle of a--” His expression is soft and for once Eos wishes she could hold back her words and be soft too. There is no more room left on her body for warmth when she is all sharp claws and spines. There is no more garden in her, no poppies or roses. She grows weeds and thorns. 

“We need to talk,” He says and she is angry. She does not want the lilt of his voice in her ears, she does not want his words. She wants peace, complete faith in what she knows. No deviancy. No treason.

“Like I said, if we could schedule an appointment first that’d be just great.” 

“Eos, please, I- I just need to--” She knows this will be about Hyperion. Anyone who met him always talked about him, as Eos remembers. It could never be about anyone else. He haunted every conversation, every interaction. Every touch was a longing for him, he could corrupt and poison anything with a glance. She would not let this keep happening.

“Whatever it is, I don’t care. I don’t give a fuck about whatever I’ve done that reminds you of my fucking brother. I don’t want to hear a single word about him anymore--” 

“If you would just stop being so spiteful and just listen to me you’d--” There is anger in his face now. It is cold, with a withering glare. Long ago it might’ve made her cower but now it only makes her stand up straighter. To match him, or show she shall not be underestimated.

“I’d what? Understand that really my brother was an angel? He was a manipulative little shit and--”

There’s a surge in the throng of servants around them. Asra is pushed into Eos, her back hits the wall behind them. There is a hand between her head and the wall, his other hand bracing himself against it so he isn’t crushed against her. Her vision is filled with him, the light that creates a halo around his head. Her hand had been raised to try and prevent his weight from falling onto her when they were pushed and now it just lies against his chest over the red scarf. 

She was never supposed to be a bitter woman. She was never supposed to be wrapped in chains, with her only defense being cruelty and sharpness. 

(This was not how fate designed them to be. For the first moment they are like this, Asra could swear he saw someone else. No. A different version of the woman in front of him. A version outside of fates’ grasp, who had lived a different life and showed it in different ways. There would have once been a woman who left her hair tied up for days to save time and in a different life he would have loved her too. 

This wasn’t that woman, but his heart-- all that remains after Hyperion’s death-- is rushing for her and he hates it. For every cruel word she’d said about her brother, there was still a core piece inside of her that acted through her impulse to help people. He had seen it, and he had seen it been smothered through the careful application of the bureaucracy she’d been put in charge of. His fingertips dig into the wall. He knows that there is something wrong, the very air has been acrid for a long time well before he ever knew of either of the siblings. He also knows that he hates every feeling he haves for Eos. 

There is something that made her this way, something other than her family.

He fears that.) 

She looks up at him, annoyance dominates her expression but there is red to her cheeks. She hates her heart for it’s need to skip, and hates her knees for their shaking. He is too close and she can feel his breath. His hand threads through her hair as it moves away from her head. 

“Eos, I--” He looks nervous, glancing away. For all the anger there had been just a second ago, it is coupled with something else. She is afraid of it. She slips out under his arm, feeling just as nervous as he looks. She tries to say something but words fail. She flees. 

[immediocregoodbye]

92 truths tag

RULES: Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 92 truths about you. at the end choose 25 people to be tagged.

Pretend @isoldmyheadbutnotmystereo  tagged me because I know she was thinking abotu me but 2, 2 shy, hush hush eye 2 eye

LAST:

drink: Iced coffee, 6 sugar packets half a gallon of half and half (what’s half a gallon of half and half? a quarter quarter of a quarter?)

phone call: Doctor’s office 

text message: My friend Alex and I talking about 10 year high school reunions and how painful high school was

song you listened to: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8-3_a24I3PY&ab_channel=BarsukRecords

time you cried: 2-3 days ago I can’t remember

HAVE YOU EVER:

dated someone twice: No

been cheated on: I don’t think so

lost someone special: How literal? Like lost in the desert? I have lost friends in the desert. Or like death literal? I don’t think in that case. Or like metaphorically people drifting out of my life? Probably but I’m a sociopath and got over it I guess.

been depressed: HAHAHAHA 

Haha

been drunk and thrown up: So this one time it was my friend Lauren’s birthday and her boyfriend worked at a bar my coworkers and I always went to after shift and since it was Whiskey Wednesday he brought out a tray of like 30 whiskey shots and since it was free and I was poor, me and every other sucker just did back to back shots of whiskey then walked to Denny’s. I puked in their bathroom twice, ended up under the table sleeping on a Barney Rubble toy someone won from a claw machine, woke up and was driven home, puked all night and then when I woke up hungover I tried sleeping it off on the couch but as soon as I started feeling better there was a commercial for Jack Daniels on TV and I got up and threw up again.

Also like 3 other times probably which isn’t that bad considering how often/the vast quantity I used to drink

IN THE PAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

made a new friend: YEAH!! I made some of the best friends of my life in the last year.

fallen out of love: No!!!

laughed until you cried: In the past YEAR? I’m sure I have but I can’t remember over what.

met someone who changed you: I’ve met people who have really affected my life for sure so yeah I guess!

found out who your true friends are: I feel like I’ve known this for like 10 years

found out someone was talking about you : I think people talk about me every day and talk shit I wouldn’t even be surprised I don’t need to find out I KNOW

GENERAL:

how many people on tumblr do you know in real life?: God, I know a lot of Tumblr people in real life actually.

do you have any pets?: One dog (my parent’s), one cat (actually my wife’s but WHATEVER I LOVE THAT CAT)

do you want to change your name?: Nah I don’t care

what time did you wake up this morning: 10am

what were you doing last night: Drawing and using some dope bath bombs, possibly at the same time (spoiler alert don’t bring your laptop and tablet in the bath, that creates a literal bomb in your bath)

name something you cannot wait for: I’m gonna see my goil soon and I can’t wait!!! 

have you ever talked to a person named tom?: Hell yeah one of my good buddies is named Tom and he’s DUMB 

what’s getting on your nerves right now: Fucking everything I’m on my period THAT’S MY PERIOD YA DUMB BITCH THAT’S MY PEERIOODDD

blood type: A+ (because I aced my blood test wink)

nickname: ???/ I have a lot but none that are like widely used. Kisa, Burro, Gay, Twin, Star Bud, Bea, E, etc (etc isn’t a nickname)

relationship status: murried

zodiac sign: Gemini

pronouns: She/Her

favorite show: Steven Universe, Adventure Time, Gravity Falls, BoJack, for recent shit. For older cartoons, Futurama, ATLA, old Spongebob, FOP, Hey Arnold. Not cartoons, Parks and Rec, B99, 30 Rock, like anything on food network lol.

college:Went/Dropped Out, finished an AA online but never finished my degree in art or w/e. Might go back someday to be a MFT but masters in therapy takes a long-ass time

hair color: Really dark brown and gray

do you have a crush on someone: Is it gay to say your wife

what do you like about yourself: Fuck uh. I think I’m a good friend and try my best to make people feel good about themselves. I’m good hearted and treat people well. I’m a good listener. I think I can be pretty funny. I can be creative if I try. I’m open to doing a lot of new stuff. I’m pretty open-minded and cool w/ going with the flow. I cook pretty dope. 

FIRSTS:

first surgery: My first ever and I shit you not was an 8 hour hip surgery at a hospital that has a very specific specialist for the type of hip injury I got. I was in the hospital for 5 days recovering and had 12 pins and 2 plates put in.

first piercing: OKAY LISTEN my first piercing was my ears, I got it done at the mall and they put some fuckin CHEAP material in my ears. I ended up having an allergic reaction and my skin actually CLOSED over the backings so I was trying to take them out one night and couldn’t?? I went to the hospital the next morning and they numbed my ears and cut the skin open to get the earings out. I was like 8 years old lol.

first sport you joined: Soccer, age 9

first vacation: I don’t really remember because my family took my siblings and I on vacation every year - it was usually a trip up the coast of California, to Monterey, Morro Bay and San Fran.

first pair of sneakers: Yes

RIGHT NOW:

eating: I wish

drinking: I wish

i’m about to: lose my mind UP IN HERE UP IN HERE

listening to: A Youtube video which is talking about politics because I’m an adult that listens to polical news while drawing!!!

want kids: Probably not I wouldn’t want a child that’s genetically my own because of the lotta problems I have, I’d adopt if I ever decided to but I don’t think I’ll ever want kids because I’m sort of selfish with my time and wouldn’t want the commitment of a child. 

get married: RIGHT NOW??? AGAIN?? @man-cultural-outing

career: My current career is what I’ve wanted to do for a while, which is mental health and drug counseling at a rehab, but if I moved into another career, I’d hope to move up into therapy or if I ever committed to doing something art related I might consider it

WHICH IS BETTER:

lips or eyes: Prob like eyes more

hugs or kisses: I like both, I think hugs are nicer probably

shorter or taller: Doesn’t matter, as long as your heart is tal and your temper is short

older or younger: Are we talking like dating preference or just people or...? Like? I don’t care honestly, I have no preference in physical appearance, age, whatever.

romantic or spontaneous: Romantic

sensitive or loud: Sensitive

hookup or relationship : Relationship. I’ve been aware I’m asexual since I was an early teen and I’ve never considered hooking up with someone before.

troublemaker or hesitant: Hesitant. I’m super afraid of getting in trouble and I fold under pressure fast lol.

HAVE YOU EVER:

kissed a stranger: If I did it was a long time ago

drank hard liquor: See answer up above (also one night in Isla Vista I had 13 shots of Everclear and didn’t died)

lost contacts/glasses: Don’t think so

sex on first date: Never

broken someone’s heart: I mean I’ve rejected people so probably

been arrested: Probably

turned someone down: A few times

fallen for a friend: That is almost exclusively what has happened to me

DO YOU BELIEVE:

in yourself: Not really but I also tell myself I just gotta do the shit I gotta do and I get it done.

miracles: I’m not totally sure. I think great things happen randomly sometimes and I think things work out for the best and I’m grateful they do but I accept that it’s just random luck. I’ve never prayed for a miracle or anything.

love at first sight: Sort of. I don’t think love based on attraction at first sight is a thing for me. But I think understanding I love someone the first time I meet them and get a vibe about them is something I can say I believe in.

I don’t really care to tag anyone I can’t remember who I’m friends with so if you want to do this just tag me and say I tagged you okay thanks