#it’s being paranoid af because it can’t be that simple

[soulless-bex]

the french language on countries/languages: if it’s a noun it’s capitalized, if it’s an adjective it’s not, but there’s also these seven exceptions you need to be mindful of

the english language on countries/languages: IF ITS A COUNTRY THERES A CAPITAL

[dioslesbianwife]

Jofoes eating out at a restaurant headcannons :3

Choosing the Restaurant •••

Dio insists on dining at the most luxurious, five star establishment. He scoffs at anything less.

Kira suggests a quiet, normal restaurant with polite staff. It also has to be far from his house since he dreads the idea of anyone from work recognizing him and seeing him with these people.

Kars dismisses all suggestions, claiming no human food could ever satisfy him.

Diavolo refuses to voice his opinion because he doesn’t want anyone knowing his preferences. He also tells Doppio to stay quiet.

Pucci doesn’t really care where they go. He subtly supports Dio’s suggestion though.

Wamuu and Esidisi prefer a place that serves meat in large portions, Diego agrees.

Valentine insists on choosing an American style restaurant, even if they’re in a different country. Though he may relent and instead go for a restaurant that serves whatever-country-they’re-in’s specialty.

At the Restaurant •••

Dio strides into the restaurant like he owns it, already judging everyone inside.

The host will either seat them in the best spot if they’re intimidated by the men, or the most hidden spot if they’re weirded out by them lol.

The pillar men can’t fit through the doorway without ducking, causing a bit of a scene.

Kars silently examines every corner of the restaurant, unimpressed by human décor.

Pucci is calm and composed, quietly murmuring a prayer for the evening to go by fast.

Diavolo arrives late, refusing to come out and relinquishing control to Doppio, who fumbles nervously while explaining the reservation.

Valentine demands the most private, exclusive table in the restaurant. He’s charming enough to convince the staff to comply most of the time.

Seating Arrangements •••

Valentine positions himself at the center of the table, claiming it’s the seat of “true leadership.” Dio tries to take his spot, Valentine diplomatically offers him a seat nearby, subtly asserting dominance but Dio just uses The World to pause time and sit down.

Kars attempts to challenge this, but Dio refuses to back down. Kars begrudgingly sits beside him, glaring the entire time.

Wamuu and Esidisi take the seats near Kars, the table slightly tilts under their elbows.

Kira ensures he’s far from the louder members of the group and near the window, where he can observe the passersby.

Diego sits on Kira’s other side, equally uninterested in being near the others .

Pucci sits next to Dio, while Doppio sits at the far end, avoiding interaction as internally, Diavolo is telling him what to order.

Ordering Food •••

Dio: Orders the most expensive wine and a lavish steak cooked to perfection. He insists on “tasting superiority” in every bite- to the waiter who doesn’t give af.

Kars: Refuses to order initially, calling human food beneath him.After some persuasion (and Dio mocking his refusal), he reluctantly orders a plate of meat, annoyed by its mediocrity.

Wamuu: Orders several plates of meat. He eats with dignity but causes a stir when he demands to know why the portions are so small.

Esidisi: Loudly orders spicy food, proclaiming that no human dish could match the heat he can tolerate. He even challenges the waiter (who does not get paid enough to care) to get the chef to make it hotter.

Pucci: Orders a simple, healthy meal, explaining that overindulgence distracts from enlightenment. Though he does make sure there’s no shellfish before eating.

Kira: Orders a meticulously prepared dish and complains if anything is out of place. He carefully cuts his food into perfect portions.

Diego: Orders a plate full of meat. Complains when it’s not cooked rare enough. Eats it pretty quickly and wants to leave early.

Doppio: Wants Italian food and takes forever to choose something since they’re not at an Italian restaurant. Diavolo is paranoid someone might poison them and just makes the dinner more miserable for Doppio. Eventually, he gets something bland and unassuming at Diavolos orders.

Valentine: Orders a steak with mashed potatoes and green beans. If the restaurant doesn’t serve this, his eye twitches in irritation but he stays composed enough to adjust his order. He also insists on a high quality bourbon to pair with his meal.

The Meal •••

Valentine insists on taking the first napkin, which literally nobody cares about nor challenges him on.

Kars mocks Dio’s choice of wine, claiming he could create a better one himself. Dio retaliates by saying Kars doesn’t even have the palate to appreciate the finer things in life. This escalates into an argument about who is more divine. Wamuu tries to mediate, insisting both are great leaders. Dio and Kars tell him to stay out of it.

Esidisi’s food is so hot and spicy that steam rises from his plate. He praises its “mild” flavor while Wamuu cheers him on, proud of his master.

Kira remains silent, carefully eating his food. However, he gets visibly annoyed by how loud and obnoxious the others are and moves his chair farther away.

Valentine appreciates Kira’s quiet demeanor and uses it as an example of “the dignity every citizen should strive for.” Kira just nods silently, unsure how to respond.

Diego tries to make casual conversation, only for Dio to dismiss him with a smug remark about being “the superior Brando.” Diego glares but keeps quiet, plotting ways to undermine him later.

Diavolo spends the entire meal making sure Doppio is scanning the room for threats. When the waiter approaches with a drink refill, Diavolo takes over and activates King Crimson, skipping the interaction entirely to avoid any perceived danger.

Pucci remains calm and composed, occasionally stepping in to mediate disputes. He quotes scripture to ease tensions, which Kars openly mocks, claiming human religion is meaningless. Pucci goes back to praying silently for patience.

Valentine finds Pucci’s calm nature admirable and engages him in a philosophical discussion about destiny and the concept of American exceptionalism. As the only other American at the table, Pucci is kind of forced to respond.

Diavolo erases time when the bill arrives, hoping to escape payment as he does not want this dinner on his purchase history. However, Dio notices and forces him to cover the entire cost.

Aftermath •••

The restaurant staff is left traumatized, swearing never to serve this group again.

Kira leaves early, disgusted by the chaos, and takes a long walk to calm down.

Dio and Kars continue arguing outside, with Wamuu loyally defending Kars.

Pucci thanks the staff and leaves a generous tip, apologizing on everyone’s behalf.

Diego and Diavolo quietly slink away, both annoyed at having been dragged into the madness.

Valentine is the only one who leaves with his dignity intact. He shakes hands with the restaurant staff, assuming they know who he is and are grateful to have served a U.S. President.

The group disperses, swearing never to dine together again… at least not in public.

••••••••••••••••

i had a lot of fun with these headcannons lol ty for reading :p

[absolutehysteria]

you gotta tell us how rufus will chase the girl - what’s his approach and what’s he thinking? since he’s the president of shinra, I think most girls will be either super suspicious or scared when someone that rich and powerful likes them, how will he emotionally connect with them????

hope this is a curveball 😏

First off, this is hard. I just keep drawing a blank when I try to imagine Rufus “chasing the girl”. 

Mainly because I can’t see him “chasing” anything but his dreams and ambitions. And Sephiroth.

But I agree. I imagine most folks would be somewhat suspicious if someone like Rufus Shinra starts to suddenly show interest in them. When Rufus shows interest in someone, he’s usually looking to use or manipulate them. However, he’s going to be far more suspicious of them. They have to prove themselves, not him. 

I think of that scene from Advent Children when Cloud finally shows up to see what Rufus wants. Rufus tries to woo him to be on his side, but Cloud refuses. (They’ve always been flirting with each other lol) Before Cloud leaves, he turns back to him and says, “Rufus, if you’re hiding something…” To which Rufus responds, “I’d never keep a secret, not from a comrade.” nOt FrOm A cOmRaDe. CLOUD DIDN’T AGREE TO BE ALLIES SO HE’S NOT TELLING HIM SHIT LOL.

But that’s neither here nor there. I just like any chance I get to mention Rufus being smooth and savage af.

I think I’m struggling with this so much because I can’t really see Rufus pursuing anyone. He would need to be the one pursued. He’s closed off. Paranoid. Busy. And maybe too proud to reveal he has a crush. 

But then I also think he likes a challenge. A thrill of the hunt, if you will. And he’s definitely not shy. Also very horny.

Let’s imagine this scenario though:

Rufus at a fancy event, like a gala or some shit. He’s switched out of his usual outfit into a nice, black tux. The evening’s just started but he’s already bored. He hangs back, sipping some champagne until he sees them. It’s not just that they’re the most beautiful person in the ballroom, but there’s also a certain air about them, magnetic. He feels himself being drawn in. However, he waits. Waits to see if a date appears by their side or if they’re looking for somebody they’re supposed to meet. Nothing though. They’re alone and nervous.

That’s his cue.

He makes his way over while grabbing a second glass of champagne. A few others might try to make their way, but they back off when they see Rufus going in for the kill. His target is caught off guard when he approaches with a handsome smile and offers the champagne. 

“Where’s your date?” he asks. They mention they don’t have one as they carefully take the glass from him. “May I have the pleasure of being yours then?”

He extends an arm and they oblige with a cute smile. It’s their lucky night, right?

They talk while they dance. He tells a joke and they laugh because it’s actually funny. He flirts and they blush. He loves the color on them. Suddenly, he spins them in a wide circle. They’re caught off guard, but they manage to keep up without stepping on his toes. They laugh and ask if he’s trying to show off. He leans in close and whispers in their ear, “I’m trying to show you off.”

When the song ends, they’re so nervous they excuse themselves. Rufus watches them leave the ballroom with a small smile. He finds them later hiding at the bar. Another person is trying to flirt with them. When Rufus approaches, he gives them a look, and they’re smart enough to scram. 

They’re his date. Didn’t everyone see them on the dance floor?

He insists on another dance. More dancing and flirting ensues. He learns everything about them because after one too many glasses of champagne they’re spilling their entire life story. But they never learn anything about him because they don’t ask. He’s used to it though. 

He pulls them in closer as a hand strays further down their back. “Do you want to get out of here?”

They love the idea, of course.

Rufus Shinra is full of surprises though. He doesn’t take them home as anticipated. Instead, he visits his favorite food truck downtown that’s only open late hours of the night and serves the best damn food you’d never think to find from a food truck. They’re the only ones standing in line dressed in formal evening attire. He pays of course. They find a small cafe table to sit at. He barely touches his food though. This is a test. 

Is his date disappointed? Confused? Intrigued? Are they interested in him and not just sex or lavish dates? It’s not about him connecting with them. It’s about them connecting with him. Who do they see him as? Can he risk opening up around them and letting them in because he has a crush? He has to be careful. 

If things go well, they walk around and talk some more. He gets their number but won’t share his. He waits a day or two to call. It’s another test. He pays attention if they sound irritated or relieved or surprised. They plan for a proper date. It’ll be a simple dinner and show, wear something nice, but not too nice. In the meantime, he has the Turks run a full background check. Another test of course. The night of he calls to say he can’t make it. He asks if it’s okay to reschedule. Another test.

During dinner, he won’t talk much. He pokes at his food and waits for them to engage in conversation. When they ask to hear more about him, and only him, not his company, he smiles. He reveals certain things here and there but remains guarded. Of course, he ends up talking about his company anyway because that’s his passion. He pays attention to whether they grow bored or not.

The night goes well. He drops them off at their residence. As they stand outside the front door, he watches them blush and say, “I had a good time tonight. I’m glad I met you.” His lips brush theirs and he whispers, “Me too.” 

After that, it’s history. His crush better not fuck it up LOL. 

Basically, once he feels “safe”, he starts really laying it on thick. The fanciest of dates. Trips to exotic locales. Endless and extravagant gifts. Any free time he has, he’s sure to spend it with them. And the nights when he’s not working late, he makes sure they end up in his bed, where it’s a guarantee they’ll both end up absolutely spent.

Whew.

Okay, I might have gotten a little carried away with this. Hope y’all enjoyed LOL.

[galvanizedfriend]

p. 1: OMG thank you so much for the update, it was exactly what I needed today! I enjoyed it so much (the story and the writing and maybe the emotional rollercoaster because I'm weird like that) but oh boy... When you warned us about character death and then Aiden died I wondered if I was somehow supposed to be more attached to him but it was only fair to have a major character or two fall victim to almighty aunt Dahlia. But I thought it would have been a Mikaelson, hoping that their deaths are

p. 2: less permanent. But my baby Caroline didn't deserve this! And my heart breaks for Klaus going through losing her for a second time. The first time already screwed him up quite a bit (understandably so) and I'm scared to see how he comes out of this. Dahlia sure as hell knows what she's doing. Please don't keep us waiting too long for the next update, if possible. I can't wait to see how you explain and link everything together and I also need the comfort that my KC babies will be okay.

p. 3: I mean you wouldn't just kill of Caroline for good, right (or Klaus)? I don't think I can handle that. But apart from being eager for an update, I really loved the chapter (with the disclaimer on Caroline of course!). I can see why it means so much to you and you certainly did not disappoint. I loved how Caroline joined the brothers for brunch and dropped kisses on them both. Giving Klaus of piece of her mind for excluding her yet again but also reminding him that she loves him. Ugh my KC

p .4: heart!!! And I also loved Caroline taking the lead on Eve's protection plan. She got Elijah to see reason but as per usual Klaus is a stubborn bastard. That's why it was so heart-breaking to see him push everyone away thinking only he could protect Caroline and Eve and then losing Caroline yet again. I'm still waiting to know more about his plan and see if he'd be able to see it through with Caroline gone. So many things coming together in this chapter, it was amazing. Thank you so much!

p. 5: Excuse all the rant and spam in your inbox but you're super great, it was a yet another wonderful chapter in such a beautifully written story and I just had to channel all those emotions somewhere. Thank you for all your time and effort and I can't wait to read the next chapter! Lots of love from a fellow Klaroliner <3

Hello, five parts anon! I know I said i’d be coming back to reply in a few days and now it’s two weeks later and I don’t know if you’re still there, but I’m finally here! lol ����🧡 I’ve updated the story, so I think it’s ok to have spoilers out. Anyone who would mind spoilers have already read it, I guess.

I’ll add a read more line here so this won’t be gigantic in people’s dashes. lol

First of all, thank you SO, SO much for this amazing message! 🧡 It’s super sweet of you and I’m so flattered you took your time to write a five parts ask! Wow! That’s just incredibly nice!

So. Caroline’s death. 😂 I had been kind of alluding to it for a while now. The way things had happened, how scared Klaus was, the way he’d been acting, it was kind of an indication that things would be heading that way. However, at the same time it proves he was right to be paranoid, his paranoia was exactly what provoked her death. It was what prompted Dahlia to figure out that Caroline was the piece that had to be removed from the playing field in order to tip the brothers the way she wanted them, the perfect way to break all of the alliances - between Mikaelsons and Crescents.

The reason why I decided to go there was because I didn’t buy anyone’s motivations at the end of S2. I think I’ve mentioned this here before. Klaus is crazy for no reason, Elijah turns on him out of nowhere because Hayley tells him to. Aiden was not that important to anyone (other than Josh) to become such an important tipping point. So everyone’s reasons were extremely weak, which meant I didn’t feel for any of them when all hell broke lose, just thought they were all dumbasses, and that Klaus went WAY too far with his revenge tour. So, in order to offer some more motivation, I made it so that Klaus had been slowly growing more and more paranoid since Caroline’s death. He made mistakes, trusted the wrong people, and that eventually led to her death. So this is why he refused to trust anyone here, including his siblings. Elijah turned on him, not because someone told him to. He did it because he believes Caroline’s death was retribution, because Klaus caused her to die. He’s angry af, so that’s why he does it. Because his brother became a liability and he was likely to get even worse after her death. And the reason why Klaus will - well... 

So everyone is where they needed to be at this point, but their motivations are different. And while Hayley simple walked out after Aiden and then decided she wasn’t going to come back because she didn’t want Klaus in Hope’s life, here Caroline never did that. But she was still incredibly hurt, mostly because she came to the conclusion that Klaus’ despair was paranoia was rooted in his feelings for her. 

ANYWAY. I’M SORRY. I digressed a little here. lol You know she’s going to come back. lol That’s not even a spoiler. There’s no way she’ll stay dead forever. BUT. Some stuff will happen. lol Thank you so much for your message, anon! Hope you can enjoy the next update! And feel free to come and rant any time! :)

🧡🧡

[space-------kid]

can’t keep my hands (off you).

Anime/Manga: One Punch Man Pairing: Garou/fem!Reader Additional pairing/characters: platonic Metal Bat/fem!Reader, Zenko, mentions of other heroes such as Saitama, Watchdog Man, etc. Genre: Romance, comedy Warning: Absolute silliness. Language – Garou and reader both ate rainbows for breakfast. Dumbassery. Teeth-rotting fluff, maybe? Reader is hella strong like Saitama. Half-assed spice because you’re good at cockblocking Garou despite being low-key thirsty for him. And LOTS of dumbassery from the reader, most probably. Additional tag: Dream-based fic, canon-divergent, Garou is horny af A/N: This is supposed to be a lengthy one-shot, but I’m a dumbass who can’t keep my word so the supposedly one-shot isn’t a one shot anymore.  Now I have to worry how I should properly divide all those parts (I mean, they’re already divided, but–) 😅

Garou thinks your thighs are great.

Summary:

Your life had its general ups and downs, pros and cons, the good and the bad.

You were admittedly a coward and afraid of being targeted by people for it. Following the advice of your (best) friend you trained hard, like, FUCKING hard, and now you’re blessedly, utterly strong you can take down enemies with just one hit. A good thing, really. Can’t let any bad guy harass you or something.

But-

You were probably cursed with the biggest, baddest of luck. Not only were monsters chasing you, suddenly there was this fucking hot bastard weirdo who kept on calling himself the Hero Hunter. “I’m not a hero, goddamn it!”

i. and ii. | iii. and iv. | [more to be added]

“i can’t keep my

hands

off��!”

- can’t keep my hands off you/simple plan

v.

You spend the following days feeding a stray wolf in your modest home.

In all honesty, you had no idea when Garou began coming in and out of your home as if he shared ownership of the place with you. It’s not like you invited him or anything when you brought his unconscious ass home the first time. You were just scared of leaving a possibly dead body back in K-City Nature Park that fateful day. Lucky for you he survived getting hit by you in your fight instinct two times in a row, yeah?

Maybe that was how far your luck would push itself, however, because every time the (admittedly) hot yet weird bastard stepped inside your quiet abode, he never failed to turn it – as well as yourself – upside down.

You were currently eating cold soba in the living room when you heard the tell-tale sound of your backdoor creaking. The house you’re living in – given to you by your parents when you turned seventeen – was located on the border of K-City, the next house closest to yours was almost 700 meters away from yours. This should’ve been a problem for any average coward, but you were a weird, introverted one since neighbors and the idea of them coming by to visit creeped the hell out of you.

The only downside you could think of when you moved out of your childhood home when you turned seventeen was that you were now living away from your parents and your best friend Badd and his little sister Zenko. Good thing public transportations were awesome, huh? And Badd was a pro-hero, an S-Class to boot, and so he’s got some privileges here and there which he never refused to share with you and your parents alongside Zenko.

Your heart beat began to increase in tempo when you recognized Garou’s footsteps padding somewhere in your kitchen. Sure enough, you heard the fridge door opened and slammed shut. Seconds later, the guy himself slid down the couch next to you, nursing a cold bottle of Coke.

Please don’t make me hit this dumbass again, you prayed to whoever might be listening. Please.

“Yo.”

Eyes narrowed, you simply shrugged in reply to his greeting and continued to aggressively eat your snack.

You could feel Garou shift beside you, throwing an arm behind you on the couch. His fingers were grazing your shoulder, and you could practically feel his gaze on you.

“You’re always staying home, [Name],” he commented and pulled the bottle cap off with his teeth – the absolute mad lad! “Don’t you go to school or something?”

You tilted your head to look at him, an eyebrow raised. “Well, you seem to always be wandering about, so… pot,” you replied then nudged your elbow on his side, “kettle.”

“Fair point,” said Garou, shrugging. “But to answer the question: I don’t need school. I already know everything I have to. You?”

“I graduated already when I was fifteen,” was your nonchalant reply. Garou choked on his drink and looked at you with what seemed to be admiration.

“Really? You’re strong, and you’re a nerd on top of that?” he exclaimed, grinning.

You could tell that he didn’t mean to use the term as an insult, and you bashfully averted your gaze in embarrassment.

“Badd also calls me that,” you mumbled unconsciously.

Garou blinked and looked at you curiously. “Eh? Who’s that?”

Somehow, you got the feeling that you didn’t need to tell him that your best friend was a hero. Well, Garou tried to beat you up when he mistook you for one, hadn’t he? Maybe you should just trust your gut feeling and forgo mentioning Badd’s title.

“Ah, he’s my best friend.”

There. Short and simple.

Garou stared at you for a solid five seconds, as if judging you for keeping him in the dark about Badd’s identity. Then he grinned again.

Fuck you and your paranoid ass.

“I thought you were gonna say boyfriend for a second,” he commented, leaning down at you. “Glad there’s no one stopping me from having my way with ya.”

Oh, god. And so it begins.

Eyes narrowed at the other teen, you quickly got up and repositioned yourself on the armchair beside the couch. You clutched your bowl of soba, your knees on your chest.

“Don’t you start again, Garou, I’m warning you,” you scolded him, trying and failing to sound stern. How could you when your heart was practically in your throat at the moment?

He pulled himself off the couch to follow you, bracing himself on the armrests of your seat and effectively caging you. Garou leaned down, eyes sparkling with mischief when he looked at you with mock innocence.

“I ain’t startin’ nothing, little lady,” he purred, smiling devilishly down at you. “And why did you move here? It’s much cosier on the couch with me on it.”

You pressed yourself further against the back of your seat when Garou fully invaded your personal space by lowering his face to yours. You could only watch as he took the chopsticks from your stiff fingers and began eating your snack, all the while keeping eye contact with you. You watched, entranced, as the noodles slipped between his lips.

“This is good,” said Garou through a mouthful of noodles. He took some and offered it to you, gazing at you expectantly. “Say ‘ah’.”

You sat there, forcing yourself to tear your gaze off his mouth and looked up at him dumbfounded. You could practically feel your face heating up in nervousness, your heart beating triple time as Garou waited for you to respond.

Mind on the brink of blanking out, you timidly opened your mouth and let him feed you. Your heart pounded in your ears and you could only hope that Garou wouldn’t hear. You tried hard not to squirm under his intense gaze when he pressed the tips of your chopsticks on his bottom lip.

Holy. Fucking. Shit.

From attacking you twice because he mistook you for a hero, you suddenly ended up with him raiding your house every now and again to grab some grub and some bandages to patch himself up from whatever the hell he was doing. And now he seemed to be hell-bent on teasing you and making you flustered.

Did he have nothing better to do than to mess with you like this?

“Say, [Name]…” he said, voice low and gaze smoldering.

“W-What?” you stammered, eyes hurting from how wide they were while you looked back up at him.

Garou dipped his head lower, nose touching yours. You couldn’t close your eyes, afraid that he would take advantage and do something weird.

Like what? Kiss you?

If he could read your thoughts, he would be cringing by now with your incoherent mental screaming.

“Do you mind if I…”

Golden eyes left yours as they turned downwards to gaze at your trembling lips. Garou moved-

You closed your eyes.

“Do you mind if I get some of this for myself? I’m starvin’.”

Wait. Why did his voice sound far away now-?

You opened your eyes to see Garou standing up straight before you, one hand resting on his hip. He was looking at you eagerly, head cocked to the side and a tell-tale grin on his lips.

Thoroughly mortified for falling for this jerk’s teasing, your leg shot up to kick him where the sun didn’t shine, annoyance rising in your chest as Garou cackled at you and easily moved out of your range.

“Hey now, what’s with that red face?” he laughed at you. “Where you hoping for something?”

Afraid that you might say something stupid if you thoughtlessly took the bait, you carefully and thoroughly thought of a reply as you rose to your feet and shoved your bowl at him.

“Yeah, I was!” you replied, sarcasm dripping in your voice. “I was waiting for a monster to crash on my doorstep and kick your stupid ass!”

Maaaybe you shouldn’t have kid about that last part because true to your word, your house was shaken by a loud explosion, followed by a booming roar. You – albeit apprehensively – and Garou rushed out to look where it came from, and the two of you saw a fifteen-foot tall frog-like monster with disgusting tentacles coming out of its mouth.

You and your dumb bad luck.

The frightening creature turned its gaze at you to your house, its tentacles wriggling lecherously.

The bowl you were holding fell on the wooden porch but you didn’t even notice.

Disgust and terror swamped your entire being and you had blacked out before you knew it, Garou letting out a surprised noise as he caught you before you hit the ground.

F̖̜̳̼̏͛͐̈̚͢Ḭ̵̛̦̣͓̣̾̎̎̑̋̊͊͘G̷̛̛͇̮͍̰̒͗̾̌̚͟Ḩ̷̢͚͇̅̇͊̅̆̓̉̎̋͘͟T̸̨̛̗̩͎̞̟̾̿̾̍̾̃̈̓͟

 .

.

.

To Garou, monsters and the thought of them winning were the only fascinating things worth spending his time on.

He aspired to be one, the kind that would plunge the world in utter terror. The absolute evil that would be the world’s greatest enemy. The world itself was unfair, so why not become the most unfair being there was if only it could mean that humanity would unite under a single flag and create the ultimate hero to beat the God-level calamity he aspired to be?

In order to achieve his dream, he had to establish a routine that he must follow single-mindedly: beat the admirable heroes and let each victory be his step into reaching his goal of becoming a true monster.

Fate must’ve been smiling at him lately, to Garou’s absolute glee. Not only had he single-handedly took down a room full of ruffians and three A-Class heroes back at the Hero Association HQ, he had also beaten some other heroes the following days with the addition of an S-Class to boot!

Yeah, Fate had been kind to him, but Lady Luck had thrown him a huge curveball in the form of dainty little you.

Garou was a prodigy, a martial arts genius that even the old geezer Bang praised back then (before he was expelled from the master and creator of the Water Stream Rock Smashing Fist style’s dojo). He was a force to be reckoned with during a fight, his tremendous strength backed by his astounding reflexes and ingenuity.

They were nothing against your unpredictability and shockingly overwhelming strength, however.

“Oi, [Name], you scaredy cat,” Garou called you, shaking you awake ever so slightly as the monster’s rampage took it nearer to your house. “Is this really the time you should be fainting?”

Losing to you twice had been a huge bruise-inducing slap to his ego, something he would never admit. He even learned jack shit during those encounters other than the fact that he seemingly can’t find nor predict ways on how to counter your moves – I mean, how could you hypothesise an attack from someone who showed no interest in fighting, someone whose body language only seemed to scream “don’t fight me, please”? He ought to beat you to a pulp for all of that, but-

You opened your eyes to reveal the same dull look they had when you beat Garou, your face devoid of any emotion. The hairs on the back of Garou’s neck stood on end, a chill creeping down his spine when you idly removed yourself from his arms.

He watched as you took a step forward and leaped towards the monster in the blink of an eye. Garou’s golden gaze widened as you lifted one of your legs and brought it down on the monster’s head with unparalleled force, crushing its huge head and body on the process. You then somersaulted away as what recognizable remains of the beast crashed, the mysterious being dead before it could hit the ground.

Garou remained where he stood on your porch as you turned around and marched back to your house, still wearing that expressionless look. What surprised him the most when you reached him was the minute quirk that appeared on your lips when you turned your dull gaze on him.

The self-proclaimed Hero Hunter’s only reason for taking interest on the strong was because of their – well – strength and fighting capabilities. You have them, you definitely do when you were in this state where something (your fighting instincts, maybe?) seemed to take a hold of you to fight and defend yourself on the process. But there was something hot arousing appealing on seeing a small and delicate cowardly woman go “instant kill” mode and thrash monsters regardless of their size and strength with just one hit.

Now this was the reason why Garou kept on coming to your humble abode unannounced and incessantly teased the hell out of you. He wanted to see more of this side of yours, and maybe gear up a mock fight or two?

But, nah. There’s no appeal in losing to you a third time if that was possible.

His rational side agreed with that kind of reasoning.

Teenage hormones, the one he successfully kept locked for the whole duration of his puberty, thought otherwise.

Garou grinned widely at the warring sides of his brain as you snapped out of your trance and squealed pathetically at the green blood of the monster that had splattered on you.

Maybe losing to you again wouldn’t be so bad as long as he got his head crushed between those killer thighs of yours.

---

to be continued

[simonxriley]

100 for Liz and Price! I can see Liz whining for a sandswitch when shes (not feeling well, with child, ect.) And Price finally giving in but its like 3 in the morning and thats why he didnt want to at first bc he has work and he was salty AF about her getting to stay home while he goes out (but only bc he was tired and he didnt wanna leave her)

*Rubs hands together* There’s a few ways I could’ve gone about this prompt but I decided to go to when Liz was pregnant because she craved a lot of food during that time and they were bickering idiots too. I pretty much took your idea of having Liz make Price leave the house for the sandwich, but I did change it up a bit. This is also more dialogue heavy but I do hope you enjoy this

Drabble Challenge!

Prompt: “You can only suffer through my whining for so long until you get up and make me a sandwich.”

Besides the constant feeling of discomfort, the mood swings and the weird cravings, Liz’s pregnancy was going swell. The baby was healthy, she was healthy and that’s the most she could ask for. Well maybe actually giving birth since she was eight months along and felt like she was carrying a watermelon, she just wanted him out at this point.

Since she was so far into her pregnancy, her days consisted of sitting, a lot of sitting and getting ready for their soon to be new arrival. Price still worked, but he was taking his paternal leave in a few weeks so he would be there for the birth knowing full well that Liz would have murdered him if he was to miss it because of work. And he wasn’t going back until she was all healed up.

Liz was happy that he wanted to keep working so she could become a stay-at-home mom, but she missed him when he was gone. It was just her, in their little home in Hereford until he comes home late at night. She couldn’t wait until their son was born so he would home a little bit more.

As the day wound down and after getting a few things done in the nursery she decided to watch a movie on the couch until Price came home.

The movie she was watching bore her, but there wasn’t anything else on and she wasn’t about to get up to look through the movies they had. So to pass the time she was trying to catch the popcorn she was eating in her mouth. Luckily it wasn’t long before Price walked into the house.

“Oh thank god you’re home.” She sat up a little more, placing the bowl of popcorn on the coffee table and smiled over at him. “I’ve been so bored.”

He walked over to the couch and sat down with a heavy sigh, his hand coming up to rest on her, hopefully done growing swell of a stomach. A small smile forming on his face as his thumb caressed her stomach.

“I’ve missed you too Liz.” He leaned over to give her a chaste kiss. “How are you feeling?”

“I want this child out of me John, I’m so uncomfortable nowadays.” She moved back so her back was against the couch, adjusting to find a comfortable position. “Other than that it was good. I finally hung up those pictures in the nursery and organized his clothes a little bit more. How was work?”

Price narrowed his eyes at her, and he let out another sigh. “You know I didn’t want you to do that, I was going to put the pictures up. I didn’t want you straining yourself Liz, you’re the one pregnant here.”

“John it wasn’t an issue, you already put the nails in the wall I just put the pictures on the nails.” She chuckled and covered the hand that was still resting on her stomach with her own. “I do appreciate you being so concerned though.”

“What is that supposed to mean?” He sat up a little straighter, angling his body more towards her.

The small smile on her face slightly faded as she gazed into his eyes. “Don’t take this the wrong way, it’s just you’ve become a little too overprotective. You’ve barely let me do anything during this pregnancy, I know my body and I know my limits.”

“Is it a bad thing I want to do all the heavy lifting? You’re carrying our child Liz, the only child we’ll probably have. I don’t want you getting stressed because you’re too far along to do something.”

“That’s not what I mean.” She sighed. “I’m talking about you freaking out when I’m on my feet for more than five minutes. Look I don’t want to argue, this pregnancy is almost over with and I am happy you are this concerned. Sometimes you can get a little overbearing.”

“No argument there.” He moved his arm around her shoulders, letting her snuggle up against him. “You can’t fully blame me for that, I’ve never dealt with this before.”

She looked up at him through hooded eyes and narrowed her brows. “Neither have I. You just got paranoid after reading all those baby books.” She laughed. “Which is pretty cute. It’s more endearing that you want this as bad, if you didn't, I don’t think you would be so paranoid.”

“I didn’t know there were so many complications during a pregnancy.” He removed his arm from her shoulders to get a better look at her. “I never knew I wanted it until it happened. It’s going to be a lot different from training soldiers, I am looking forward to this fatherhood thing.”

“It’s a good thing you weren’t firing blanks then.”

Price rolled his eyes and stood up, heading for the kitchen and all Liz could do was laugh.

                                                           xXx

It was the middle of the night and Liz couldn’t sleep, her back hurt and it didn’t help that the little one decided it was the perfect time to kick at her ribs and she was craving a sandwich.

She groaned and set her book aside, reaching out to touch Price’s arm. “John?”

He stirred in his sleep, cracking open an eye. “Yeah?”

She gave him a sheepish grin, fiddling with her hands. “Can you get me a sandwich?”

He opened both of his eyes to glance over at the clock, reading it was three in the morning and sighed. “It’s three in the morning, I have work soon, can’t it wait?”

“No.”

“Can’t you get it?”

“It’s hard enough for me to get in and out of bed as it is and I’m not gonna drive down at three in the morning heavily pregnant.” She pouted her bottom lip at him. “Please?”

“I’m sorry but no, you’re just gonna have to wait.”

Price laid back down, fixing the covers around him. It made Liz sighed through her nose at how inconsiderate he was being. Yes she knew he had work soon, bit he can easily get up, go down stairs to make the sandwich and come back up a lot faster than she could. Being eight months pregnant wasn’t easy.

“But your son wants a sandwich too.”

“No he doesn’t. Go to sleep Liz, you’ll forget about the sandwich in a few minutes.”

“I’ve been craving this sandwich for two hours now, I don’t think it’ll go away anytime soon. And I can’t sleep, your son is kicking my ribs.”

He sat up, cupping her stomach with both hands and leaned down. “Hey stop kicking at your mother’s ribs so she can sleep and stop bugging me about that sandwich she wants, please.”

“I wouldn’t be craving this sandwich if I wasn’t eight months pregnant you know?” She arched a brow, taunting him. “And to think I was so nice as to let you cum in me to begin with.” Price had an unamused look on his face and laid back down, closing his eyes. “Damn I thought that would work.”

“Liz just please try and get some sleep.”

“Not until you get me a sandwich.”

“I’m not going to get you a sandwich at three in the bloody morning.”

“You can only suffer through my whining for so long until you get up and make me a sandwich.”

He threw the covers off of him and got up throwing his arms in the air. “Fine, fine I’ll get you your sandwich.” He grabbed a shirt from his drawer and a pair of pants and put them on, sitting back down on the bed to put his boots on. “I’m sure you want your usual?”

“Yes please.”

Price sighed and tied up his boots before standing back up. “I’ll be back in ten.”

                                                            xXx

Liz went back to reading her book while she waited, the little one still kicking up a storm. He must really want that sandwich as well, she couldn’t blame him, it was delicious. Simple, but delicious.

She heard the door close making her ears perk up. She put her book back down on the nightstand, sitting up more eagerly. A moment later Price walked back into their room with the bag in one hand and a coffee in another.

“Here you go.” He handed her the bag and sat down with a groan, taking a sip of his coffee.

Liz opened the bag and took out the sandwich, quickly glancing over at him. She felt kinda bad for having him go out at this time, but some cravings are worse than others. She moved her sandwich to the side and scooted over to him, placing a hand on his cheek and forced him to look at her.

“Thank you!” She leaned forward until their lips met, a small hum being heard from Price’s throat. A moment later she pulled away, a small smile spreading across both of their faces. “I know I haven’t been the easiest person to deal with these last few months and I appreciate everything you do for me, for us.”

She ran a hand over her swell and smiled down at it, feeling him kick even more.

He placed his coffee on the nightstand, then placed both of his hands on each side of her belly - a small smile forming on his face. “Yeah you can be a pain from time to time. I was an asshole, not wanting to get up to get you something you were craving knowing moving around can be difficult.” He looked up at her, locking eyes. “I would do a lot for you Liz, for both of you! And I am quite happy I wasn’t firing blanks.”

Liz laughed and grabbed her sandwich, placing it in front of her and opened it. “Now about baby number two.” Price nearly choked on his coffee, turning to her with a shocked expression on his face. “What? You think we’re just gonna have one? No, we need a little girl after this and then we’ll be the perfect little family.”

He shook his head but still had a small smile on his face. “How about we talk about it in a few years?”

“If you say so mister I don’t like to pull out.” She took a bite of her sandwich, moaning in satisfaction and arched a brow at him in a taunting manner.

“You should be nicer to the man who made you a mom.”

“And you should be nicer to the woman who made you a dad.”

Price laughed and shook his head. “Cheeky.”

She gave him a cheeky grin that made him chuckle. “Only for you babe, only for you!”

[isa-ghost]

A Long Ass Theory (7/25/18)

BUCKLE UP KIDDOS, THIS IS A REALLY LONG POST/THEORY AND YOU SHOULD READ IT.

This took me SIX FUCKING HOURS to write out, holy shit.

First of all, I don’t like that title.

“GUNS GUNS GUNS GUNS GUNS GUNS | Enter The Gungeon”

Why? Because...

A certain someone we know and love has experience with guns.

Second of all...

Yeah... this.

Why is this concerning?

Simple.

Last time Chase and Anti were in the same video in any way, shape, or form, Anti was charging at Chase while he was in a drunken stupor at the end of Dark Silence. We never saw what happened after Anti reached Chase, if he even did.

Also, it could just be me (please tell me if someone else has noticed this too back in May) but when “Jack” acts suspicious, especially when the video gives off Chase vibes, he gets this weird sarcastic? tone in his voice throughout the entire video. I’m even more unsure about what I’m about to say, but when he says something he knows we’ll point out as a possible hint, he looks directly into the camera. Maybe its just a few times, maybe every time, or maybe I’m just remembering something incorrectly and he doesn’t do it at all, but that tone in his voice for sure tends to show up a lot every time he acts suspiciously like Chase.

So with all this unsettling information in mind, here’s everything I found suspiciously Chase or Anti-like in today’s upload:

The title, and the intro, as previously stated.

2:14 “Everybody’s dead, I’m happy” Honestly there’s a lot of “death” references through the whole video which while they ARE concerning for paranoid, over-analytical Anti theorist reasons, its hard to say that they’re cryptic hints given the fact that its a game where youre supposed to kill people and therefore the death comments are relevant to the context, rather than being out of the blue “Jack being weird” comments. I’ll keep all the mentions of death I find alarming in the list anyway, just to be safe.

4:52 “What happened? I don’t know but I’m glad you’re dead!”

11:37 “You’re all gonna know the name by the end of this. You’re all gonna know the name of your victor.”

 12:25 That’s a really weird Chase-esque “dude-bro” type person laugh, if you ask me...

13:44 He refers to himself as Jack. I’m only mentioning this because it either confirms he isn’t intentionally being suspicious and we really are just paranoid OR its a reminder that Chase is posing as Jack while he’s in a coma. Or MAYBE this IS Jack after Stories Untold #4, awake from his coma and struggling to remember things. He “doesn’t remember” his intro because “he hasn’t recorded in so long” which could be a joke about how he took a week-long hiatus but could also be a nod at how he was in a coma.

16:52 “I could also die. I could die in real life. If you die in real life, you die in the game.”

17:14 “I’m just doing it for all the people out there to make them feel like I’m a regular bro.“

19:16 “I have to go three dreams deep and meet Leo Dicaprio and bring him back to reality.” (Sounds more like bringing Jack out of a coma to me) Needs to meet his kids. (And this sounds like Chase). I think I’m over-analyzing this one but *screams in paranoia*

19:32 “I just slaughtered a whole bunch of babies. ... It’s what I do. I’m ruthless.” There were a lot of theories that Anti might have hurt Chase’s kids after Dark Silence. Especially after he screamed “WHERE ARE THEY?!”

20:00 “Dope af, as the lit kids would like to say.” This one’s probably me just O/A again. It sounds like a dad trying to keep up with the lingo his kids use...

23:22 He uses the “Chase voice” and drops an iconic “sah dude” that we’ve started to associate with him for almost a minute straight.

24:38 “Because I can’t be trusted. We all know that by now.” *Glares at Sean* yeAH NO SHIT, MCLOUGHLIN.

26:03 “Hi, I’m Jack. I’m a pathological liar. And a piece of shit.” Could this be Anti pretending to be Jack and mocking him? Probably not lmao. Or maybe Chase knows Jack isn’t a very good friend? He said he’d kill/let Chase die first if he had to choose and that he finds him annoying, yet Chase considers him a friend. We DO know from TIE that sometimes if Chase gets too heated, he tends to “break character” and rant to us.

28:58 “My parents may have never told me they loved me, but that doesn’t matter” *Gestures wildly at the “Chase was abused” theories and how when Chase was the one recording the video in Mayhem, he’d make a lot of “my dad”/“my parents” references*

30:42 “I like the little sounds they make. It makes me feel like I’m killing a whole bunch of tiny babies” Ah, Anti harming Chase’s kids vibes again.

32:22 “What I need is love and support” Just like in GNOG, this just gives me Chase vibes... “And also your compliance and your own death.” Aaaaand Anti vibes. Anti talking to Chase? Chase talking to Anti? Anti talking to Jack? *Explodes in theorist*

34:38 “Its just cause... me and my dad” Another damn “my dad” reference like back in May.

36:29 Jack glances behind him for basically no reason. We all know what that meant in May...

37:38 “Don’t hit me, don’t hit me, nooo papa!” *Chase was abused theories intensifies*

44:14 “[My mom] never paid enough attention to me and I had a bunch of time to play video games”

44:50 “Did I have a stroke? Can I remember anything?” Mmmm coma vibes

48:26 (Singing) “Your parents don’t love you”

55:27 “Don’t I look like a guy that deserves good things in my life? I’m not a bad guy.”

58:54 “GET AWAY FROM HIM! Don’t get closer to him, he’s a stranger man! Stranger danger, remember what you parents said!” He highkey sounds like Chase scared/scolding his kids to stay away from Anti... Just sayin’-

59:02 “Actually my parents told me go play in traffic. Suddenly explains a lot.” *Vibrates with abused child Chase vibes*

1:00:55 “Don’t mind me, just going to the store to try and get my life back together.” That last part just... sounds like Chase recovering from the divorce (or maybe after his suicide in Bro Average/Henrik saving him like he mentioned in KJSE?) *coughs in over-analyzing, whoops*

With all this in mind, I also want to make note that I’ve seen some things floating around my dash about the following, which could also imply incoming doom for us ego enthusiasts and theorists:

The anniversary of Antisepticeye vs. Darkiplier is coming up in 3 days. Mark and Jack already confirmed several times that they would not be doing another collab like that one again, BUT--

--Jack mentioned that he and Mark have some cool plans that they can’t talk about.

Mark has the genius skills to make Markiplier TV and WKM happen (with help, of course). What if he’s helping Jack with a video featuring multiple/all egos? Jack DID say during tour that at some point later in the year he wanted/planned on a big video with all the egos. That was sometime in the early spring, and its now almost the end of summer. I think that counts as “later”...

Mark apparently mentioned revisiting some egos. I think he’s referring to the Wilford videos, personally, but I still find this noteworthy.

Robin is apparently going to L.A to hang out with Jack. While this is probably just him being a supportive friend and all that, after what I’ve just said... I trust nothing.

Jack confirmed he planned on doing more skits/sketches/etc while he was in L.A.

We are still waiting on Bro Average 2, which Jack confirmed would eventually become a thing.

With all this in mind, Jack, his god tier editor Robin, and ego video-making genius Mark might all be together at once at some point in the near future. We MIGHT be in for some serious community fires soon, guys. Get your extinguishers ready.

I feel like I might be waaay over-analyzing a lot of this, but the levels of unease in the theorist part of the community have been very high lately. Better to note down what we find questionable than to not take notes at all only to suddenly get slammed with fire, right?

[orion-blvck-blog]

A List of Things About Orion

This is a list (duh) of headcanons and other little facts about Orion. It’s a bit long and nothing is in any particular order, although I tried to organize it a little bit. Some things are kind of important (like his job and shit) and other things are just for fun. It’s mostly here so I don’t have to remember some of this stuff.

Orion was born on May 16th, 1929 at 3:33am. He is a Taurus.

His favorite word is ‘fuck’.

Orion is a very serious and stoic man, but he still has that same shit-eating, arrogant Black smirk that just pisses people off.

He’s also an asshole. A know-it-all asshole and enjoys making people uncomfortable, angry, or scared. It’s funny to him.

All of Orion’s clothes come from their world, but every piece is custom made and perfectly tailored to his measurements. As far as fashion goes, Orion is much more modern than other wizards. Mostly because he doesn’t want to dress like some old wizard like Dumbledore.

He is very serious about healthy eating and nutrition; always starting the day with a bowl of oats and berries, hardly ever eats red meat, and he hates bread. Sweets and junk food rarely make it into the house without him knowing (or so he thinks). He also has no problem pointing out someones unhealthy eating habits and giving them a lecture.

Orion carries an extra wand with him at all times. It is an uncommon practice (I think???) that he started after his escape from the hands of Aversio. The wand is nothing fancy, but very flexible and a well-rounded. He keeps it tucked away in the sleeve of his shirt, completely hidden and out of mind unless he calls upon it.

He also keeps a hidden silver dagger up his other sleeve and one around his ankle. Dude is paranoid af.

He’s cheated on Walburga. Quite a few times and feels incredibly guilty, but can’t stop.

He loves playing wizard chess. Especially when he’s playing with Drik, but don’t tell anyone.

Orion has a sister who he is extremely close to, but has kept his distance from her the last few years in case his enemies realize this and try to find her. She understands.

Orion worked at the Ministry for nearly 30 years in the International Magical Office of Law as well as the International Confederation of Wizards. This position was particularly useful to Voldemort and Orion often used it to spread Death Eater and anti-muggle propaganda, all secretly of course. Before being captured by Aversio, it was well known that Orion was a purist and despised anyone who wasn’t pureblood, but it wasn’t known that he was a Death Eater. He retired in the fall of 1978, at the urging of Voldemort so Orion could fully dedicate himself to the cause.

In his mid 20s, Orion became an alcoholic not long after killing for the first time under Voldemort’s orders. Blackouts and violent outbursts were very common when Orion drank enough and because of this he has been hospitalized three times. The last time was after he murdered a muggle family which made headlines in the muggle world. Voldemort gave him an ultimatum and he has been sober ever since. It’s been six years. The only time Orion has ever relapsed is when Sirius ran away. No one knows this except for those closest to him.  

Because of his sobriety, Orion is an avid tea drinker. There is almost always a cup in his hand. He likes black or jasmine tea and demands that it be extra hot otherwise he won’t drink it.

He doesn’t wear his Death Eater mask during meetings or with the Inner Circle, but if he’s on an assignment or just out causing chaos then he’ll wear his mask. It’s well known within the Death Eater army who he is. He does have the mark.

As a Death Eater, Orion has given his life to the Dark Lord and has worked hard to make his army strong. In his younger days, Orion was one of the Death Eaters who interrogated and tortured their enemies. He was exceptionally good at breaking a persons mind, body and spirit. These days Orion focuses on battle strategies, training/helping the younger Death Eaters, and completing specific missions from Voldemort himself. Sometimes, he is called upon to interrogate particularly hard cases. 

He was badly injured and dehydrated during his imprisonment. Orion was mostly used as a punching bag when Aversio members realized he wouldn’t talk. Because of his injuries, Orion now walks with a cane. Some days are easier and he can keep it hidden in his robe. Other days are horrible and he must use it despite how weak it makes him feel.

Orion escaped Aversio with no help, practically with his bare hands, and is finding it increasingly hard to suppress the resentment and bitterness he feels towards his fellow Death Eaters for leaving him to rot in his cell.

He always wears a black and gold ring on his left hand; a family heirloom with the House of Black crest engraved on it. If he is in grave danger, the ring will disappear and reappear in his safe in his study. There is a faint glow to it. When that glow stops, he’s dead. Yeah.

The only person who can open the door to his study is Orion himself, unless he allows someone to enter or changes the spell.

Deep in his closest, there is a leather jacket in perfect condition that he stole from a muggle-born in his third year at Hogwarts. He wore it nearly everyday instead of his robes, but once summer came he hid it so his parents wouldn’t find it. Not even Walburga knows of its existence.

He never wanted to be Minister, not even as a child, but when Voldemort asked him to run Orion had no choice but to say yes. It was merely a show of power and strength after one of his best managed to get captured. Orion was relieved when it was announced he didn’t win, though he can’t help but feel like a disappointment for failing Lord Voldemort. 

All of his shoes are charmed so if he leaves footprints anywhere they will disappear immediately.

Wherever he is, Orion sits with his back to the wall that way no one can sneak up on him. Not that anyone would try, right?

His first love was a half-blooded Ravenclaw girl. He regrets fucking that up, but reminds himself that he had no choice.

Despite being a very skilled dueler, Orion is known to resort to physical violence, especially if he’s been drinking. He packs a punch just as powerful as he throws spells.

As a student at Hogwarts, Orion focused on his studies to the point of mental and physical exhaustion in order to please his parents. Some days, it took all of his strength to get out of bed. Other days, it took all of his strength to not break down completely. When he wasn’t working on homework or studying, Orion played Quidditch as one of Slytherins beaters and was even team captain in his sixth and seventh years. 

Many believe Orion’s hatred for Sirius is because he willingly left the family and while that is true, it is not the whole truth. Like Sirius at his age, Orion dreamed about running away from the House of Black and creating a life of his own. It is very simple: Orion is jealous of his son for being able to do what he could not, though he would never admit it not even to himself.

If you’ve made it this far, GOOD FOR YOU AND I REALLY APPRECIATE YOU READING THIS SHIT <3 <3 <3

[valkerymillenia]

I ask all 50!!! Fill us with fun facts about you!

Holy shit, again?! I’m not that interesting, you know?But ok, I’ll try, I’ve already answered some though.

1: What color are your socks?

Answered.

2: Have you ever lied about your age? Why?

Answered already!

3: What is something you regret in the past month?

So much wasted time…

4: Do you believe in love at first sight?

I’ve answered this before- no, I believe in attraction at first sight; love, however, needs to be earned, grown and nourished.

5: When was the last time you wrote someone a letter on paper?

Do notes to translate conversations into paper for my deaf dad count? If so, then today.If you mean real letters… I honestly don’t remember.

6: How old were you when you first learned how to ride a bike? Who taught you?

Answered!

7: Do you get along with your parents? Why or why not?

Oh my gods, this is such a loaded question…Ok, I’ll try to keep it simple. Who am I kidding? That’s not possible.

Mom- ok so my mom is denial of any form of mental illness but she clearly has manic depression and war PTSD since forever. So as a result my mom has always been a bit aloof, irresponsible, neglectful, super permissive, a sneaky opportunist and a slightly childish and impulsive. Never thinks ahead, just goes nuts on the moment or spends too much time asleep (no in between).So my mom wasn’t the best mother in the world, she was a great caregiving and spoiling mother when we were babies but as soon as we gained minimal independence (aka around 5 years old) she just slacked off on the motherhood department. She’s not very bad, she’s just irresponsible and opportunistic and won’t interfere if we need help which doesn’t suit a mother but she’s a great person so she makes a very good friend (as long as you set boundaries and basic duties), she’s funny and sweet and a bit geeky, she’s also beautiful and used to be a model before I was born so she’s that fashion and beauty oriented friend (if fact she’s a certified beautician and taught me all she knows).So… Complicated relationship, lots of love but not the best mom (can’t blame her, grandma was a bitch).

Dad- I love him, he raised me, but I was also his main caregiver since I was 10 since he’s deaf and crippled. He’s a funny and permissive dad (except when he had explosive bouts of rage but that was a phase…a traumatic and slightly violent phase around the divorce time but short), he tried to be a provider and friend with shared interests with me. BUT he was also quite neglectful, being deaf made him very introverted, paranoid and isolated so he just let me run wild (I didn’t, I was taking care of the house and school instead) while he was cooped up playing pc games. We have that friendly daddy’s girl relationship but we both lack trust, we keep our more important thoughts to ourselves and I’m always afraid that as a deaf person he’ll misunderstand important things or judge me for whatever (and he’s always also feeling judged) so our relationship often feels shallow, he’s also the type in denial about people’s mental illness.

Biological father- Fucking complicated. As a little child he babysat me and was our neighbor so I was always hanging out and getting candy, he was also the person that cherished me the most to take hundreds of photos of me. I moved at age 5 so after that we only communicated through my grandma when she traveled between countries, he’d send me presents and worry about me. I only found out he was my progenitor when I was 10 and it took me years to accept it. Saw him again when I was 18, in fact it was like shock therapy- I spent a whole month living with him as I visited my hometown again. He likes to spoil me as much as he can and he’s very kind but also naive and stubborn and not the type that likes to talk about feelings or important things so talks between us are extremely awkward chitchat.

Stepdad- Terrible relationship. He’s the kind of person that is a caregiver for us all out of duty but then uses that to emotionally manipulate everyone. He’s small minded, old fashioned and selfish and blames everyone for his problems, he also seems to have a personal thing against me- pretty sure he doesn’t hate me but I’m his natural verbal punching bag, anything I say or do in front of him, no matter how innocent, even standing still for a moment or asking to pass the juice at dinner, he twists everything into insults and psychological abuse. Luckily my sister is his baby so she escapes his judgement but he wasn’t that much of a present parent to her either and let her run wild a lot (I’m so glad I could turn that around and teach her to be way more responsible than her parents). The only reason I don’t totally hate him is because he gave me sister, who I love most in the world.

8: What’s your favorite season?

Answered!

9: Do you currently like someone?

Yup, also answered before.

10: Have you ever used an Ouija board?

I know how but I never used it, as a Wiccan my preferred specialty for spiritual communing was pendulum scrying.

11: What’s the last song you sang?

“Havanna” by Camilla Cabello has been stuck in my head for weeks.

12: What’s your favorite scent?

Telling me to choose just one fav of anything is hard af… But here are some favs.

Fresh peppermint, lavender, petrichor, burnt eucalyptus, baby powder, sea water, freshly baked bread, and oddly enough- gasoline.

13: What’s your favorite urban legend?

Can’t choose favs but off the top of my head… La Llorona.

14: What’s a bad habit that you have?

Procrastinating.

15: What’s a strange habit that you have?

All my odd stims and ocd rituals.

16: What’s the first instrument that you learned to play?

Answered.

17: How would you describe your ‘type?’

Already answered in the previous ask meme.

18: Would you rather stay in or go out?

Both, when I go out I make it special and try to make the most of it because it’s rare… But I guess I do prefer the safety and routine of staying home.

19: What was the last thing you said to your mom?

“Never going to see what you borrowed from dad again, am I? This is why people don’t trust you, you never keep your promises…

Well, whatever! How are the stitches? You’re better, right?

Ok, put my sister on. Kisses, bye.”

20: Do you want to get married someday?

Already answered in the previous asked meme.

21: Have you ever snuck out?

Not that I needed to with my kind of parents but yeah, a couple of times.

22: Can you sing well?

I love to sing but whether I’m good or not is up to the listener, I can post a song sample if anyone wants.

23: What’s an embarrassing thing that happened this week?

Other than grovelling desperatly for help?

24: When was the last time you went sledding?

Never?

25: Have you ever/do you liked someone you know you can never be with?

Yeah.

26: Do people often mispronounce your name?

Yes! If you’re not a Portuguese speaker, I DARE you to pronounce my surname. Go ahead- Coelho.

27: Would you like to live in another country?

I do miss my home country, South Africa holds my heart… and I’ve dreamed of a stint in Japan. But all in all, I like this country, it’s…interesting, safe.

28: Do you like to watch ghost-hunting shows?

Not really, they tend to be too over the top and stereotypical. 

29: Who was the last person you said you loved to?

Boyfriend.

30: What’s something you’d like to be better at?

Follow through.

31: Have you ever stayed up to talk to someone who was sad?

Very often, Some right here on tumblr.

32: What was the last thing you cooked?

Chili con carne. Been eating leftovers of it for a whole week now.

33: Do you think you would make a good parent?

Answered already.

34: Do you have trouble sleeping at night?

Answered!

35: Where is your best friend right now?

Given the day and time, my sister is probably at dance practice now.

36: How long does it take you to get ready in the morning?

Depends if I’m making an effort (an hour) or if I’m just being casual (20min).

37: How late do you usually stay up at night?

Answered.

38: When was the last time you cried and why?

I don’t know… 

39: Have you ever won a contest?

Yes, started this year by winning a Justice League pop contest. But that was more of a giveaway... Actual contest? I won a couple b of art contests before but nothing big.

40: Can you draw well?

I have art posted here so you tell me.

41: Would you ever date someone you met on Tumblr/the internet?

Sure. I already do.

42: What was the last thing you ate?

….Bread.

43: Do you think you’re/you’d make a good boyfriend/girlfriend?

I sure hope so, I try my best… But to be honest I don’t think I’m a very good partner.

44: Have you ever had a near-death experience?

About 6 actually.

45: What do you think people think of you?

I don’t know… I’ve been told I make people feel comfortable and I’m easy to open up to? But to be honest I don’t really know.

46: What is your middle name and do you like it?

Augusto. My mom’s maiden name, because that’s how it works here (Name+ maybe 2nd name + mom’s surname + dad’s surname). 

Yes, I like it, it’s latin. But people sometimes mix it up with my paternal grandma’s first name.

47: Are you close with either of your parents?

In my own way, yes. Both mom and dad.

48: Do you like yourself?

Some days…

49: State five facts about your appearance –

-I get a lot of comments on my boobs and I really don’t mind

-I look pale because I stay inside a lot but I tan very easily, probably because my mom is dark

-I love my tattoos, I’m proud of them

-I wear glasses or contacts in important occasions 

-I have the worst time looking people in the eye

50: State five facts about your personality –

-I’m patient but full of anxiety

-I don’t have just one personality

-I try to be as unbiased and non-judgmental as possible

-I’m obsessive about random things

-I like solitude but I also like interacting (though the more non-physical the better)

[tellywoodtrash]

ishqbaaz 19.09.17 lb

god, back to the mysterious kaagaz. fucking tell us already. 😒😒😒

shakti seems all cavalier about this, but dadi is fuh-reaking out. which of course means it’s gonna come out in a horrible fucking way and phelofy raita. 😖😖😖

oh great. it’s related to both billu and anika? PLEASE GOD DON’T TELL ME THEY’RE LIKE... RELATED OR SOME SHIT. PLEASE. THIS IS GULNEET, I PUT ABSOLUTELY NOTHING PAST THEM, NOT EVEN INCEST. 😟😟😟😟😟😟

please lord, let it just be the normal thing - the oberois murdered anika’s family or some shit. yes, that’s NORMAL for this show. 😣😣😣

billu ka OMG SECRET AGAINST ME radar is extra sharp after all the shit that’s gone down. try to even plan a secret birthday party for him? not gonna happen. the man is going to be just that heckin’ paranoid. 😐😐😐

dadi lying through her damn teeth like a pro. 😊😊😊

omfg, he just made sadface and was like “jaake intezaar karta hoon uska.” JESUS CHRIST BILLU, GET A DAMN HOBBY. MAKE A TUMBLR. REBLOG SOME MEMES AND PICS OF CATS. GET A DAMN LIFE YOU FREAK. 😕😕😕😕😕

but lord, it’s also kinda adorable. 💖💖💖

*does tilak and feeds gauri dahi shakkar* 

man what ghazab confidence this girl has, straight away introducing herself. i’ve been at my workplace for over 5 months now, and there’s people i see everyday and smile at, but don’t know names of. and now it’s too damn embarrassing to ask. 😕😕😕

aw, uncleji wants to learn english to talk to his bahu! 😌😌😌

oh great. a smart aleck teacher. already side eye-ing him. 😑😑😑

gauri kumariiiii sssarma’s looking kinda star struck and impressed by this idealist teacher dude. gosh i hope spoilers of a jealousy track are true, coz i would fucking love to see om jelly of this guy. hee hee hee. 😊😊😊

god i really don’t get why they make gauri all awkward about handshakes????? 😒😒😒

billu is chehak-ing coz wifey is back todayyyyy! 😚😚😚

OMFG HIS SHEEPISH GRIN MY GOD THIS MAN IS TOO FUCKING ADORABLE IT’S MAKING MY TEETH HURTTTTTT 😫😫😫😫😫

wifey is strong independent woman who don’t need no man and is back all by herself. tough luck to billu who might have been looking forward to maarofying chance in the car. 😝😝😝

GOD I AM SO HAPPY TO SEE HER BACK PLEASE SURBHI DON’T EVER LEAVE US LIKE THIS AGAIN UNLESS THERE’S A BANK OF EPISODES PLEASE THIS SHOW IS UNBEARABLE WITHOUT YOU LIFE ITSELF IS UNBEARABLE WITHOUT YOU I WILL NEVER LET YOU GO *clings to her leg* 😭😭😭😭😭😭

lololololol a simple question and she’s biting his head off. she’s still hellllla mad. 😂😂😂

HAHAHAHAHAHAH THANK YOUUUUUUUUU 🤣🤣🤣🤣

“jaise hawa mein aapke helicoptor udte hai waise roadon pe humare liye busein bhi chalti hai.” 

THE SNARK IS STRONG. 😆😆😆

“araaam se aana dadi!”

pffffffffffffffffffffft 😂😂😂

lmao anika ne toh thank you ka jaaaaap hi kar rakha jaise koi mantra ho. 

billu is suggesting they go to the roommmmm. 😏😏😏

LMAOOOOOOOOOOO HER FACE 

the slightest touch and the tharak is on! look at their bodies just gravitating to each otherrrrrrrrrr! holy shit, just baaaaaang already! 😯😯😯😯

i think anika’s maaarofying current these days like devrani used to. billu’s staring at his hand all perplexed. 😌😌😌

“thank you kehkar bohut badi galti kar di maine. nahi, PAAP HO GAYA MUJHSE!”

snort. you know what they say billu, hell hath no fury... 

dadi looks pareshaan af. 

oh great, anika’s going to take this on her head? 😟😟😟

oh thank god, she’s delegating to shivaay. good. 😌😌😌

billu’s here for round 2, but anika bohut hi gambhir mood mein. awaiiii. 🙄🙄🙄

this angst is so fucking random and unnecessary????????????// 🤔🤔🤔

billu’s been guilteddddd. 😐😐😐

LOL OM IS LOSING IT AND I AM FUCKING LOVING IT 😂😂😂😂

i fucking love kunal’s panic waala acting, like during the baby track

HAHAHAHAHA HIM RUNNING AWAY FROM THE DOOR PRETENDING LIKE HE WASN’T STANDING THERE WAITING FOR HER ALL THIS WHILE OMFG WHAT AN ADORABLE DORK 🤣🤣🤣🤣

yeah this asshole has gotten too complacent about her life revolving around him and needs to be knocked two or three pegs down. this is perfect opportunity. 😊😊😊

lol such ~subtle questioninggggg. 😋😋😋

awwwwww, he was waiting for her to eatttttt. 😯😯😯

it’s ok. ek din nahi khaaya toh kuch nahi hoga. suffer a little for being a dick. 🙃🙃🙃

still love you though, boo.  *pats his hair* 😘😘😘

OMFG THIS BILLU HAS GONE MAD. HE’S DEMANDING DADI INVENT A FUNCTION SO HE CAN MAKE ANIKA FEEL SPECIAL. MATLAB, HADH HAI YAAR. 😒😒😒

ALL THIS IS SO FUCKING UNNECESSARY, JUST FUCKING TELL HER YOU LOVE HER. MY GOD WHAT EVEN IS YOUR FUCKING LIFE, SHIVAAY? 😐😐😐

i blame his damn family for indulging him like this. my fam would just be like fuck off, we can’t be wasting time like this to validate your every whim and fancy. think of something yourself. spoiltass brat. 🙄🙄🙄

what’s anika so SMILEYYYYY AND CRYING about??? 🤔🤔🤔

god she looks so fucking pretty. i want to cap every frame, she’s that gorgeous. 😍😍😍😍

are those the papers billu tried to write her a letter on? she’s this happy just seeing “dear anika” written a buncha times? 🤔🤔🤔

but they look like some legal papers though?

billu be like hein? abhi tak maine kuch kiya bhi nahi? 

OHHHHH IT’S THE SAHIL KE CUSTODY PAPERS. SILLY TT. *FACEPALM* 😯😯😯😯😯😯😯

LOL GENUINE THANK YOU THA BILLU. DON’T LOOK SO SAD. 😄😄😄

lol he’s freaking out at her tears, as usual. 

aw, he’s remorseful that he can’t say what she wants to hear. “main koshish kar raha hoon, lekin atak jaata hai...” 

“jaanti hoon aapko waqt lagega, lekin please, thank you mat bolna, please.” 

an unofficial thank you ban has been instated. 😆😆😆😆

“what you said, it meant the world to me.” 

LOOK AT THIS SAD PUPPY WHO IS UNABLE TO SAY THE WORDS HE WANTS TO NO MATTER HOW MUCH HE TRIES 💘💘💘💘

she’s oh babe. tumse nahi hoga. stahp. 

ok crying a little lot. because like i said in my very first analysis post, she’s never really needed the words from him. he’s been showing her through actions that he loves her from waaay back. and she’s understood. right from then. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

“YOU A DAMN BHEEGI BILLI”

his faaaaaaaaaaaaaaace. oh my godddddd. i love this idiot so much. 

GIRLFRIEND PUTTING THE MOVES ON HIM AGAIN SHE’S PUTTING THE MOVES ON HIM AGAIN THIS IS NOT A DRILL OMFG ALL MY DREAMS ARE COMING TRUE I CAN DIE HAPPY LORD 😫😫😫😫😫

OMG SHE TOLD HIM AGAIN AND BILLU LOOKS LIKE HE’S BEEN HIT BY A FRYING PAN OVER HIS HEAD ALL THAT’S MISSING ARE CARTOON STARS AND BIRDS ✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

sister here knows exaaaaactly what she’s doing to her husband. look at that smug grin. 😏😏😏😏

lol she’s waiting for another thank you! 😆😆😆

nope. not making that mistake again! 😎😎😎

left standing there with that same dopey smile! 😊😊😊

aw, he’s vowing to tell her anyway. you go billu!!!! 😘😘😘

svetlana’s showing jhanvi exactly why tej is being so cooperative. 

lovinggggggggg jhanvi’s shock. coz she’s such a dumbassss. honestly, she’s not even worthy of being svetlana’s foe. my girl be living in 3008, while you losers are living in two thousand late. 🙄🙄🙄

omki’s wifey is missing againnnnn. 🙃🙃🙃

great pinky is here to taang adaofy again. 😑😑😑

same, omki. #same.

what joy does this woman get from fucking with these kids’ marriages? does she have some kinda jocasta complex or what? coz i realllllllly don’t get it. 😣😣😣

god bless omkara and his sweet sassy smile while telling pinky that this is not a big deal. i’d just be like fuck off satan. 😒😒😒

god, yeh do - to - go dialogue chupke chupke se nahi churaya gaya? 🤔🤔🤔

why’s this teacher dude’s shirt open to like, the third button? it’s making me uncomfortable. 😖😖😖

ooooooooooooh gauri’s stuck hereee. 😯😯😯

“yeh mera badappan hai jo tum aise free ghoom rahi ho.” lmao i love svetlana so much 🤣🤣🤣

god queen, just kill her dumb ass. 😒😒😒

ughhhhhhhhhhhh. this garbaaaaage. 

PAINTING? WHAT PAINTING? PHIR MURTI KO KYUN DEKH RAHI THI??? 😧😧😧😧

HA. YESSSSSSSSSSSSSS, FUCK HER UP SVETTTTY. 😈😈😈

is this painting nonsense going to be supernatural too? like she travels through alternate planes using the painting or some shit, like the principals in harry potter? 😩😩😩😩

omfg she blew a kiss. i’m in loooooooooove. 😍😍😍😍😍

oh greattttt, allllll these idiots are on this case again. that too standing in the middle of the fucking house and talking about it louuuuuuudly. this is exactly why villains are able to fuck you idiots up. 😒😒😒😒

om looks least bit interested in all this. he’s just here coz shivika are, and the wife isn’t home to stare/passive aggressively banter with. 😆😆😆

oh, that got their attention. 

do you even know WHICH PAINTING? 😐😐😐

omkara exhibiting that his art degree is very much useful, thanks very much. STEM IS NOT EVERYTHING OK, DESIS????????/ 😒😒😒😒

WAIT THESE PPL ARE SO FUCKING RICH AND THEY HAVE AN ENLARGED PHOTOCOPY OF A PAINTING HANGING IN THEIR HOUSE? 😐😐😐

haaaaaye my handsome boys. 😍😍😍 

oh, svetlana replaced the painting. 

ok who the FUCK is this fucking white fucker IN INDIA who doesn’t know what fucking chai is? 😒😒😒😒

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THIS TEACHER, WHY IS HE SUCH A LOSER? 😤😤😤

yes, i know what he’s doing. he’s forcing them to interact with this white asshole in english. but matlab, hadh hoti hai unconventational teaching methods ki. 🙄🙄🙄

ok bade bhaiyya is soooooooo fucking team Gauri that he’s just not even trying with omkara anymore. which ok, i love and all, but come on shivaay, you gave fucking rudra alllll that advice on his BS relationship, and you’re not even making an attempt with om???? 😣😣😣

chubby’s had enough of this BS. ladki toh chod ke chali gayi, raita phailaaake, sametna is bechaare ko pad raha hai. 😪😪😪

lol are rudra/chubby the couple for today? i am fucking lovingggg it. 😊😊😊

literally no one is interested in being here other than shivaay and anika. ugh these new couples and their enthusiasm. 🙄🙄🙄🙄

look at this poor anxious munchkin. 😚😚😚

.... has surbhi gotten extra golden on her vacay, or is nakuul not wearing his makeup today?? he’s looking reaaaaaallly pale compared to her in this scene. 😐😐😐

even anika’s like god knows what new plan you and dadi have made up to embarrass me publicly now. billu’s like wait and waaatch, jaaneman.  😏😏😏😏😏

great, passive aggressive sniping from pinky and shakti. LITERALLY NO ONE WANTS TO BE HERE BILLU. WHY CAN’T YOU JUST SHOW HER THE TAPE IN THE PRIVACY OF YOUR ROOM AND FINISH THIS OFF. AWAIIIII KA KHEENCHNA. 😫😫😫😫

oh god i dont wanna watch this nonsense. it’s super fucking late where i am (i fell asleep watching the episode mid way) and i have a hella long commute tomorrow and i just wanna go back to sleeeeep. 😭😭😭😭😭

shakti, this fucking savage is probably gonna come back with a cactus or some shit, isn’t he? 😂😂😂

oh suddenly now everyone’s ok with the “bhavya was a cop on duty at our place” theory???? like....??? memories and attachment to ppl like goldfish, these fucking oberois. 😒😒😒

OK RUDRA, FIRST OF ALL, PROTEIN AND CARBS KA MEL HAI IN A HEALTHY DIET. AND FUCK YOU, YOU’RE SUCH A LOSER. THIS IS WHY SHE LEFT YOUR ASS. THIS IS WHY SUMO LEFT TOO. 😑😑😑

godddddd. this episode just won’t get overrrrrrrr. 😫😫😫😫😫

meanwhile this doctor waala chutiyaapa continues. 

the white doctor just unironically said: 

waittttt, when did tej and svetlana move outta oberoi mansion??? what even is going on? where the fuck is thissss? 😐😐😐

god svetlana, why are you wasting so much timeeeee? just kill ALL these losers. 😒😒😒

gauri kumari sssssarma to the rescue. as usual. always carrying everyone’s inefficient asses. 😎😎😎

another thing she has in common with shivaay: both have leadership skills, anything happens and they jump to the frontlines and get to action. 

lmaoooooo “hai kathaiiiii angrez ki aulaaad, seedha paani nahi bol sakta tha????” 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

gauri, caaareful. don’t break his ribs or some shiz. follow the beat to stayin’ alive! 😣😣😣

what the fuck nonsense. he’s no more it seems. awaiiiii. 🙄🙄🙄

GOD I AM SO OVER THIS TEJVI PLOT AND THEIR BUDDHON KA ANGST. GIVE ME SHIVIKA AND RIKARA. 😩😩😩

ok someone fuckinggggggg kill this teacher for reallllllll. god. 😡😡😡

if she just needs to look on the internet for words she doesn’t know, she can already do that. why does she need to come to this fucking class? 😒😒😒😒

sulky!kara is standing away all angsty and shiz. what a child. anyway, good. burn, fool, burn! 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

[evilisk-played]

Games in 2019, Part... 31: Jak X Combat Racing

Completed in December

Make way for one more end-of-year completion

After finishing Jak 3, I immediately got to playing Jak X. Note that I finished playing Jak 3 back in November. 

What happened is that I got all the way up to the 3rd Eco Cup in Adventure Mode... but I wasn’t able to continue because my DualShock 4 got busted up. It turns out that even a simple problem like “the down button on your d-pad no longer works��� is enough to make certain games unplayable (Jak X literally won’t let you progress Adventure Mode, purely because to select the last two Eco Cups require the down d-pad to select).

It took me until December to get a new controller on the cheap (because, Christmas sales) and I finally managed to finish it alongside playing Labyrinth of Touhou. I didn’t 100% complete it (I ain’t no completionist, also those final sewer tracks are the *worst*) but I have seen the credits at least.

Anyway... Jak X was pretty good! The best parts of the game are easily the core racing gameplay and the story. While I still think the vehicle physics are wonky at times, Jak X is the elusive, legendary “Jak game with good vehicle physics”. I think the aspect I like most is the way pickups are handled. Are you behind? Go for the offensive powerups. Want to make that lead bigger? Or are you paranoid about getting literally blown up? Go for boosts or defensive powerups. 

The story is also amazing. Well, it’s not actually amazing. But Jak X ended up being what I expected Jak 2 to be all along. We got assholes running around named “Kleiver” and “Edje” and “Shiv” and “Razer” and we’re racing in “Kras City” and Jak is edgy af to everyone and ghost Krew is back ugh I love it all. And hey, they finally corrected their mistake and had Jak and Keira finally hooking up (seriously, who was in charge of Jak X Ashelin in Jak 3)

Now even though I ultimately had a fun time, I thought the game was pretty disappointing in a few respects. First off; Errol reappearing in Jak 3 and not here will always be the ultimate missed opportunity. Yeah, yeah I know they didn’t know at the time but it was such a *waste* to not have the racing villain not be in the racing game.

Secondly, I’m disappointed that I had to play as Jak for the Adventure Mode. I know it’s called Jak X, but it would have been cool if like, Jak handled the races while the other characters handled the other race modes  (i.e. time trials, arena battles, booster races etc.). Jak X finally presented me with an idea I didn’t know I wanted (playing as the other characters like Sig, Torn and Keira) so the fact that I don’t actually get to use them in story is a bummer. (The fact that my team mates can also blow me tf up in the middle of a race, causing me to lose, will also not-annoy me).

Thirdly, I thought the race tracks were pretty disappointing overall. While I really liked the way they could combine tracks in circuit levels, I thought that, visually, they all blended way too closely together. There are only a few race tracks I can remember off the top of my head (and I only remember those because they were so hard and I had to redo them a lot). I can’t even remember the layout for most tracks tbh.

Overall though, it was pretty good! I’ve heard that Jak X is the favored game for a lot of Jak fans. I’m not sure I necessarily agree, but I can see why people would think so. It is very good for what it is (it’s all about THE EDGE)

[autumn-in-phandom]

Dan&Phil (with no space)

SOLVE THIS CRIME- Dan and Phil play: ‘Layton's Mystery Journey!’ 

Which I think is very cute, has great banter, cooperation, a sassy Dan, a flirty Phil, with no space between them and is definitely worth a re-watch.

Timestamps below the cut because they are lonnng.

0:01 “Hello Dan and Phil Games ‘detectives’"- Phil 0:03 Magnifying glass hand thing, Tomb Raider sound effect and Phil humming Sherlock theme combined 0:11 "Professor Layton, what what"- Dan with hand motions 0:13 Phil holds his composed angelic face while Dan gives the background info. 0:20 Dan sitting by a rainy window pretending to be intellectual. What an image. 0:27 "Lady Layton"- high pitched Dan (find a guy who can do it all) 0:30 "So today I think I'm going to be Sherlock Holmes and you're going to be Watson" -Phil 0:34 "Whatya sayin?"- Dan with that look.

I don't know how they actually feel about Johnlock. They've both referenced it before but have been kind of vague on their stance. Personally I love the show but don't ship them. But the implication of shipping definitely seems to be present and Dan is at the very least feigning disapproval. That or he just wants to be Sherlock. See below.

0:35 "Well I mean, I'm like the Benedict Cumberbatch, I look like Benedict Cumberbatch, I'm more superior at mystery solving."- Nice try Phil. 

Watching Dan's face here is funny, his feigned grumpiness, transitions to a comical frown with a shrug of agreement when Phil says he looks like BC, then a funny scoff to smile at Phil suggesting he's superior.

0:45 Dan bursts Phil's bubble shooting down Scooby Doo 0:49 Woah what a jump cut between happy open mouth Phil to, what do even call that? Is that Phil's resting bitch face? 0:50 Zoom into Dan talking to give Phil a moment to recover. 0:55 "A sneky prev"- Dan 1:00 Playing in Nederlands would add to the mystery or we could test Dan's French.

1:05 "’Katrielle and the Millionaires' Conspiracy’. Dang."- very dramatic Dan 1:09 "I'm already hooked cause there's a little dog outline."- Phil 1:13 "That's all I need to sign up for an app."- Dan 1:19 "Dan&Phil with no space" (what this video should actually be called) 1:24 "Dan question mark Phil?"- strike a pose

(The iPad also assumed it was a typo as it offers Dan&Phil as a suggestion. Earlier suggestions were "Dance" and "Danisnotonfire")

1:33 Phil's monocle/magnifying glass returns with an "aha". Dan claims Phil is "repeating a joke I made at the beginning of the video", not likely Dan. Phil is all joyous laughter. 1:45 "Stop getting paranoid. Not everyone hating another person is about you, Shirley"- Dan (watching Phil's reaction to Dan's rant is hilarious) 1:50 "Are you ready for a video?"- Phil (aka "are you done?") 1:53 "Yeah."- Dan

2:00 "A misty town, in yesteryear." Dan high voice. "I'll stop ruining this." 2:05 They are both delighted by the anime style art 2:12 ‘Daddy!’ "Daddy"- Dan "Daddy. Is the first word you hear."- Phil "Daddy Layton"- Dan nods knowingly. 2:18 "No, this is not Dream Daddy."- Dan  2:29 Sad, guilt, "just a dream." 2:31 "She's got a house plant, which is a lot more alive than all of ours" 2:37 "She opens the curtains, that's why her house plants are alive."- Dan 2:40 "Ohh, that would make sense."- Phil (see Dan's ls) 2:44 Dan supports unpractical fashion choices 2:46 Phil knows a thing or too about diseased English pigeons. 2:53 "I'm going to see some corpses!"- Dan 3:00 London is not a wholesome town 3:05 "Phily's detective world. Mysteries solved for free."- Phil 3:10 "Please I just want company."- Dan after cracking up.

3:13 "Lady and a Tramp." "Nice." 3:15 "Is she gonna eat some sensual spaghetti?"- Phil 3:16 "She's gonna kiss a dog."- Dan 3:19 "The dog's here!"- Phil 3:20 "ADOPT HIM!"- Dan 3:21 "Pet the dog!"- Phil 3:22 "ADOPT HIM RIGHT NOW!"- Dan (okay boys) 3:24 "The dog has a very strange tail."- Dan 3:26 "It's defying gravity." (Wicked on the mind Phil?) 3:30 "I mean okay, I'm sorry, sign me up for talking dog."- Dan 3:45  "Please help, I'm hallucinating talking dogs."- Dan 3:55 "Is it just gonna secrete a cake through the iPad? Cause I'm down for that."- Phil 4:10 "Presuming that we actually ever *mumble mumble*."- Dan 

4:19 "Spoilers abound."- Phil 4:20 "Protection."- Dan 4:27 "Give me a cake!"- Dan 4:29 "Use more of a baker voice."- Phil 4:37 "The Power of Triangles!"- Dan (nice self reference there) 5:01 "What is wrong with you?"- Dan says with fondness 5:10 "That looks less like a K than miine did."- Phil teasing and so close  5:14 "Delet this."- Dan 5:24 "You need to stop saying 'floppy ding dong'."- Phil (um. truth.) 5:35 Phil thinking outside of the box, inside the box, very literally. 5:40 Dan gets really excited by Phil's idea of negative space. Phil gets excited by Dan moving the shapes around. 5:55 The best iPad sharing here. 6:05 Dan starts to get discouraged just as Phil figures it out. 6:10 Dan’s face 6:15 "Mmm (high five) boom."- Dan 6:26 "Well done Phil."- danisasupportivepartner 6:35 "Don't pay me in money, pay me in cakes, that would be a Dan and Phil's detective agency."- Dan 6:40 "How do you like that doggo?"- Phil 6:41 "Up to scratch. Haha ha ha hm."- Dan 6:45 "A bit of a sexy scratch there wasn't it?"- Phil 6:47 "That was a bit weird there, the dog doesn't support that."- Dan 6:48 "Sorry."- Phil (quick, soft, low, subtle banter)

6:55 "I love her voice it's like Hermione Granger meets Beatrix Potter."- Dan 6:59 "What can I do for you?"- Phil imitates her voice, because not only does he look like Voldemort, but he *is* Hermione. 7:15 "I love his ankles rolls because of his floppy skin."- Dan (talking about the dog of course) 7:18 "Aw it's so anime, I love it."- Phil 7:25 "I wanna solve that mystery. That's an ancient civilization?! That looks like a terrifying dystopian future where mantid lizards exist."- Dan 7:36 "Hello. Is that the Watson in this? That looks like you. I'm Lady Layton, you're that guy."- Dan who apparently is fine with the Johnlock dynamic so long as Phil is the Watson character and Dan gets to be a sassy femme Sherlock. (See below) 

7:44 "Ernest."- P 7:45 "Ernest Greeves."- D 7:46 "That's a strong name."- P 7:46 "Amazing."- D 7:47 "I wish I was called Ernest."- P (I think that's what he says) 7:48 "I ship it!"- Dan says all intense and growly 7:55 "Pugsworth." 8:05 "Sherlock exists in the same cannon as Layton."- Dan 8:07 "What"- Phil 8:10 Phil gives the role of Katrelle to Dan. Phil takes Ernest. Dan takes the dog of course and Phil voices Inspector Hastings. 9:30 "In the 'ole of Britain!"- Both in sync, shaking their faces, having fun 9:51 "Frickin slapped. Ernest and Sherl in the corner of Lady Layton's priorities."- Sassy Dan 

10:07 "The Hand That Feeds" (weird fist motion from Phil) 10:12 "Someone's stolen a hand!"- high pitched Dan 10:17 "That's a whole diddly operation."- Dan 10:19 "It was Spider-Man. Tom Holland wants more attention."- Phil 10:21 "Honestly what a fiend(?)"- very quiet Dan 10:34 "Do the lamppost."- Phil (not innuendo just what Dan should be investigating, Phil is trying to get him back on track but is very amused.) 10:39 "Come on, Kat, what are you dawdlin' there for, eh? The case, woman! The case!"- Phil saying dawdlin' and woman in a northern accent is great.  10:40 "Woman."- Dan echos with attitude. 10:49 "Hmph, teachin' Grandma to suck eggs, are ya?" (more things I didn't know I needed to hear Phil say)

10:55 "What bag?"- danisexcited 10:59 Oh my god both their faces right before they say: 11:00 "Wardrobe!"- Both "Yes!"- Phil 11:02 "We found the content!"- Dan Some simple puzzle solving 11:47 "Wait! I want to go in the bag. This is very important."- Dan 11:50 "Wardrobe!" (Sing it Dan!) "Yes!"- Phil 11:54 "Coatless!"- in sync 11:57 "Dating dress"- Dan "Oohh"- both "Oh hel-lo!"- Dan 12:03 "Tomboy. Equestrian ensemble!"- Dan's over the top gestures and Phil's excited face. 12:05 "I want my ensemble to be that."- Phil (of course you do) mirrors Dan's hand to chest movement. 12:07 "Slay me. Jesus."- Dan 12:12 "Sky blue, statement."- Dan 12:14 Phil with the game info. 12:19 "That's me."- Phil 12:20 "Daddy's girl."- Dan 12:21 "Okay that's not me."- Phil laughs

12:30 "He's shady AF"- Phil 12:35 "'Top o' the mornin' to ha!' Its jacksepticeye"- Phil  12:37 What the hell Dan? Calm down. 12:46 "Investigatink"- Dan 12:47 "I can't do an Irish accent."- Phil, belly laugh  12:48 "This is regional dialect reading test the game."- Dan 13:03 "aforementionedly"- both 13:25 "Stachenscarfen"- Dan 13:26 "That's you."- Phil 13:29 "Auf Deutsch"- Dan 13:38 "In a vay, yes. In a vay, no."- Dan (sounds more Austrian) 13:55 Dan yells into the iPad "Out after midnight are you Stachenscarfen? We're onto you!" (simmer down son)

(I love Phil's hands. They are big yet elegant.)

14:53 "You like twiz the..."- Phil doing circle motions 15:14 "Waiting until its midnight."- Dan says somewhere between cocky and uncertain 15:41 "Yeah. I don't- I mean, sure. Why not? It's like you have lives. Do you have lives?"- Dan 15:46 "Yes!"- Phil "YES!"- Dan 15:49 "But was it for the reason that I said?"- still unsure Dan 16:11 "Oh you want to see a dead body do you Earnest, you want to get real, you want to see crime up in your face? I don't think you can handle it Earnest!"- Dan being extra again 16:38 "Nick Booker" pun 16:48 "Wait I can do this one."- Phil 16:50 "Okay go on Phil, do it."- Dan 16:55 Pause that pose 16:57 "I live for the positive reinforcement of Lady Layton being happy that I'm assembling the clock hand."- Dan 17:03 Phil is distracted momentarily by something off to the side. 

17:05 “Hello copper.”- Dan 17:07 "'Ello 'ello 'ello, Miss Layton.'"-Phil 17:09 "That is exactly what he-"- Dan 17:10 "That's what his face looks like"- Phil 17:11 "With his tiny face!"- squeaky Dan 17:12 "It's so squished."- Phil 17:29 "Yeah get in there."- Phil (what was this about? I forget. Context.)

17:38 Danispanting  17:45 "'Magnificent'."- Dan (inside the clock face) 17:46 "That's just what we were saying."- Phil says so sweet. I think they were admiring the art design but it got cut. 17:52 "I know what gets you going Earnest."- Dan (enormous cogs) 17:58 "Like a corpse."- Dan 18:00 "I wanna do it!"- AssertivePhil (not a corpse mind you) 18:02 "Okay Phil, find the cranny. How good is Phil at finding that spot? He found it. There we go."- danisnotappropriate 18:08 "REDDISH WRISTWATCH!"- x12 nice reference 18:26 "UH CLOCK"- both groaning 18:36 "Get that self esteem, yes!"- high pitched Dan

19:17 "Do you know what you're doing or-?"- Phil with the biggest smile 19:19 "Yeahyeahyeahyeahyeah!"- Dan 19:20 Jumpcut to zoom in on the terrified children and away from a flirty Phil. 19:28 "Woyah!"- Dan 19:32 "Oh no. Oh we f***ed it. Impasse."- Dan 19:42 "You reckon?"- Dan (then “I reckon”) 20:05 "King of Bubbles."- Dan 20:06 "I would not have been able to do that."- Phil 20:07 "Really? You play a lot of uh, of um, shape popping apps."- Dan 20:11 "True. Maybe. Maybe."- Phil's eyes 

20:17 “Who do you think stole the hand?”- Phil 20:21 "I think it was the dog."- Phil 20:36 "I feel like that's a good taste of the mystery solving experience."- Dan 20:38 "Yeah. You've given it a little lick, but you don't know the full answers. Cause you could go find out yourself-"- Phil 20:43 "You just ruined the nice... description..."- Dan 20:46 "Like you've got the flavor."- Phil 20:47 "Why do you- no, no!"- Dan 20:48 "Like a lollipop."- Phil 20:49 "Stop with the licking!"- Dan 20:50 "Sorry."- back to innocent angel faced Phil

21:00 Price and Promo 21:16 "I'm just here for the anime to be honest, like a show I just started watching."- Dan 21:20 Phil tongue 21:21 "A lick of the Layton Lolly."- holy hell Dan, looking at Phil while saying that was indecent 21:31 "Clicking our buttons."- Phil 21:34 "For more vids, last vid."- Dan 21:38 "I'm gonna go kidnap a talking dog."- Dan 21:39 Sherlock theme outro and eye hand thing by Phil.

[witchymashedpotatoes]

Getting rid of Ghosts, Spirits, Demons and Negative Energies

--Sometimes, something crawls into our home, without us knowing. Either your wards are weak, or it clung onto you. Certain things you need to banish right away, like Demons. Others aren’t as bad, but you still don’t want them there. Here are some ways I’ve banished things that I don’t want around.

Sage Bundle/Sage Incense 

(Note; If anyone sends me shit about this, you’re automatically blocked.)

--Sage bundles have been used to cleanse and banish negative energies and ghosts. Sage bundles/Incense can be found pretty cheap at New age shoppes, and you can even find special ones online, that have different kinds of herbs. I personally usually just use Sage Incense, because it smells better to me, but is a little messier because it’s usually black af. Anyways, if you know something is clinging onto you, first cleanse yourself very thoroughly with the smoke. Then, go throughout your whole house and cleanse every spot. For extra power, chant something like “Anything bad, evil or negative is now cleansed and banished. You are to never enter here again.” It’s really up to you.

Music & Dancing 

--I am Neo-Pagan, so I actually got this from a show that took place in Japan (yeah, call me a nerd or what not), where the Shrine God banished an evil monster through a traditional Japanese dance. I usually cleanse with a bell, by going through all the parts of the room, ringing it and then saying a chant, like  “All things evil, negative, bad, or anything that wishes me harm it banished, so mote it be.” (Although, to be honest, I usually only banish things when it’s really bad,  so most times I’m nervous when I’m doing it, so I often ramble and end up speaking a whole fucking speech.)

--How to Prevent things coming into your Home

--Things like this can easily be avoided, if you’re a witch (jk you don’t have to be a witch. But it’s more fun to be one *wink wink*). Here are some ways you can protect you, your home, and family members from evil spooky spooky things.

Don’t Attempt Stupid Things

--And by stupid things, I meant don’t do things you can’t control. Magick, like anything in life, takes practice. You need to start out slow, and learn. You’re not going to instantly be good at knitting sweaters and socks, when all you know how to knit is scarves, right? Well, magick is kinda like knitting, in more then one way (depending on your beliefs.) You need to learn, practice, you’re going to make TONS of mistakes, and everything is tightly knit (excuse my pun) together. What I’m trying to get out is, don’t do spiritwork unless you know how to do it. In my opinion, being able to do spiritwork requires a lot of work, practice, and magick skill. If you do want to get into spiritwork, get some respectful (and correctly informed) books. You’ll obviously need to practice, but please be careful. I did some spiritwork when I was a very new witchling, and let a fucking shadowman into my home. Take all precautions.

Carry Protective Objects

--This can obviously be anything. A charged stone, a talisman or even charmed jewelry. If you are sure that a spirit is trying to harm/cling to you, (just be aware that us humans are simple and strange creatures, and we get very paranoid easily. So, make sure it is a spirit) cleanse and charge up the object often. If you want a color(s) to charge it with, I believe black (banishment, protection) and/or red (protection, power) would be best.

Cleanse, Cleanse, Cleanse

--Cleanse you and your space often. Make it so no evil thing can last there for long. If you feel something icky and negative clinging onto you, cleanse yourself. (this can also work for minor curses put upon you.) If your home feels a bit darker, cleanse and do some spells to let light and goodness in.

Wards and Salt

--Pretty much every witch i know uses salt. It can represent Earth and it’s good for protection and banishing. Put salt lines on windows and outside of doors. (Note; some animals will try to eat a bunch of salt. Also, salt and water aren’t good, unless you want it stained on window panes) If you need something a little stronger then salt, then try these;

~Salt and Crushed/Powdered sage

~Black Salt (salt and activated charcoal)

~Salt and Paprika/Chili powder

--There’s also a ton more things like that on Tumblr, so look around.

--Also, try putting up some wards, wherever you feel necessary. I like runes, the best,

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I hope you guys liked this post ♥ Please tell me if you want any certain kind of posts, or any ideas! Ask is always open as well~

Llove and Light, Amaryllis~♥ 

[survivorsolomonislands]

Episode 11 “BUT IM SAfE” (Lexi)

johnny: i love allie so much. we must save you both 4 votes zak 3 votes aro. we will make it johnny: flips and gets himself voted out why do i always align with the stupid people. i really want to know.

*continues to sip my rum bitterly* Pretty sure if I lose this immunity I'm going home next. I honestly don't trust a single person in this game anymore, not that I had a lot of trust with anyone to begin with but y'know. Johnny was one of the few people I felt I could work with, and I'm on the fence about Ryan now, he came to me about the vote about Johnny and I told him I breaking up a group would be better and now Johnny is gone. Mitchell is saying it was Ryan, Ryan is saying Mitchell already had it planned out before, and Willow is saying Johnny was a threat. I mean I think it was Mitchell's and WIllow's groups but I can't be sure. The only thing I can be sure about is I'm on the bottom here.

(a little bit later)

UPDATE: there is no way in hell i'm winning this challenge.

Welp... it took 3 fuckin seasons but i think i'm finally... in a power position on tumblevivor. I think i'm finally fuckin on top. And tru, I was a significant power player in both Machu Picchu's and Malaysia's pre-merges, but by the time the merge came, I was unsuccessful both times in forging a legitimate and feasible path to the end of this game. After Matt was voted out, I cursed my luck - AGAIN i had failed. AGAIN i was to wait and watch my ally's be picked off by Allie's. But then Willow came, changed it all, and we pulled off the biggest fucking move of this game - which I orchestrated - by taking out Johnny. And just as you'd imagine, the whole game fucking opened up. Willow and I've got a F3 with Allie, a F4 with Aro and Zak, and now I've got people coming to ME. Wanting to work with ME. Because, for now, I'm on top. And when that happens, people are going to want to tear you down, so immunity is now more important than ever... as is this next vote. I need to keep myself shored up as well as possible. My 3-way alliance chat w Aro and Zak is them wanting to target Allie w our F4 deal and Luca. I don't want that. Allie's shady and she betrayed me but at the end of the day she's also a number for me and Willow moving forward. RTP wants to work with me. For the first time ever in this game, LA hit ME up instead of me having to approach her. I think I can work with Luca. Lex, though... she gotta go. She doesn't benefit me at all, she's a former winner, she's done nothing in this game ever to make me feel good with her... her ass gotta be grass. Voting out Allie eliminates an out, and a potential endgame plan, for myself, which would allow Aro/Zak/Luca to become a F3 deal should they want to. A F5 of our F4 and Willow does not look good for me ! So I'd want the rest of the game to shake out something like this: 9th - Lex; 8th - LA; 7th - RTP; 6th - Luca; 5th - Zak; 4th - Allie, leaving a F3 of myself, Willow, and Aro, which I'd like to think I can win. Letting Allie get deep into this game is a risk but I'm willing to take it because the composition of the jury combined with her seeming desire to go to the end with me both prove good to my overall game. It's within reach, if I can just hold on to it. For the first time... maybe I could fucking win.

So here's a recap of what happened last round. - Me, Zak, Mitchell and Willow form a plan to get the majority to split the votes 3-3 so that we can put 4 votes on Johnny - We had no idea if they were 100% going to split or not but King Johnny comes to our aid because he decides to form the same exact plan but with  4 votes on Allie instead - We chose Johnny over Allie because he was the leader of the rookies alliance and with him gone most of them are free agents

This round *should* be fine, with Zak's flare and Willow on our side for good (hopefully) we have 5 votes for sure. They're planning on voting Allie and also working on turning Luca so hopefully they dont have an idol rip. I know this might come off as cocky since its only final 9, but I've been thinking about endgame a lot ever since tribal. I'm 100% confident that Willow will win any final 3 but I genuinely wouldn't mind going to the end with Zak and Mitchell because they're awesome folks aaaand they're kiiiinda getting cocky so it might give me a shot to win. Willow is amazing too but she's too big of a threat so if we get to the end she would have to go at 4 or 5

if i go home bc i played myself into not fuckin spelling reservoir correctly i'm gonna fuckin punch johnny frat boy in the face when i get to ponderosa

I'm a terrible person, I keep forgetting Luca is still in this game and I work with him. But, I mean anyone who reads my confessionals should know I'm a terrible and salty af person. Also i think the rum actually gave me a hangover, apparently bourbon and 151 doesn't mix, who knew? And I just did the immunity challenge and completely fucked up, I got a big zero, there is a reason I try never to spell anything out loud, I need to see things written. [sos]

https://youtu.be/coM4svs6ydY

LMAO I FUCKED UP THAT CHALLENGE SO BAD. I'm just really hoping other people messed up on the first word bc I don't wanna be the only one who got zero, thats embarassing. The second after I said "drout" I was like wait shit thats wrong its spelt "drought" oops!

This challenge will probably be my most shameful moment of TS, a fucking zero, I'm still not over it. But with Mitchell winning immunity there goes the main person i wanted out, which could be a good thing cause it made me rethink. I think Willow needs to go, I was so worried about Allie being a middle man between Lex and Willow that I overlooked Willow may be the real threat here. When she started gunning for Lex I just assumed it was because she was worried Allie might pick Lex over her cause they seemed so tight, but after that vote she was with Mitchell's group, and the same with Jacob's vote. Once, it can pass by as nothing but twice? and on the vote that blindsided Johnny, she's more in with that group than I thought. If I happen to be right about this, then this is our last chance to weaken their side before they get majority and I'm totally fucked because Mitchell and I might talk and get along but I think him saying he wants to work with me is 100% fake and he's just playing the game and there is no way I even make F5 with him. The biggest problem I see right now is Allie. She is the vote I really need to get to pull this off, and I'm not sure if she'll flip on Willow or not.

(a little bit later)

So apparently I freaked out Allie this morning, with coming to her about voting Willow. MY BAD. She doesn't wanna vote Willow, which I can understand, Willow has been her person throughout the game. I knew trying to flip her was a long shot but I figured I should try anyways. But I was able to make her question their relationship, since Willow has been leaving her out of plans lately. I feel like tribal is gonna be mess, but let's see how this goes~

Why do I have a funny feeling either me or Zak is gonna get idold out tonight

All day it seemed too goddamn good to be true. It looked like Lex was going to be 7 votes out, but then fucking willow and zak and aro had to be paranoid!! And IDK EUFHEWUEidsz WHAT THE FUCK THEY'RE SAYING OR DOING!!!! Granted, I don't think Lexi has an idol or would play it if she does; and I CAN think that, since I have immunity and my neck is on the line. But they're fucking going CRAZY overboard with counter measures that would send Allie home anyways???? Even if Lex didn't have an idol????? This vote is gonna be so fukcing messy bc everyone in my alliance can't just sit STILL. jesus christ i still hope it'll be 7 votes lex or maybe 5 votes lex 2 votes allie but like... i don't fuckin get it. these kids are so dumb.

I'm fairly confident someone's lying or an idol is being played tonight and I'm gonna be packing my bags at tribal. Like... I've done so much work in this game and I'm not ready to go and this seems like such a simple vote but so did the vote when everyone was lying to me and Matt was voted out. Oh my godddd I'm not in the mood to get 9th place!!! I might have to pull out my flare tonight and we might have to flip the vote last minute because this Lexi puta probably has a fucking idol and she's voting me!!! I just really feel like something fishy is going on tonight and I'm not excited

I JUST MADE FUN OF PEOPLE FOR GETTING SPOOKED BUT NOW I'M SPOOKED TOO AND IDK WHAT THE FUCK TO DO WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK

(a bit later)

OK SO FINAL TALLY BASED ON WORDS PEOPLE HAVE SAID: 5 ON LEX 2 ON LA 1 ON ARO 1 ON ZAK. WHAT I EXPECT: 5 ON LEX 2 ON LA 2 ON EITHER ARO OR ZAK. DO I EXPECT TO GET FUCKED?????????????/ YEEEEEEEEEES FUCK YEEEEEEEEEEES BUT I GOT IMMUNITY ZAK GOT A FLARE IF AN IDOL COME OUT A FLARE COME OUT WE GOTTA RISK IT FOR THE BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISCUIT LET'S DAAAAAAAAAAAANCE

[5/4/17, 9:07:12 PM] Mitchell Kalabang: I heard the vote was gon be for aro [5/4/17, 9:07:17 PM] Mitchell Kalabang: if ur down for that?? 

On 5/4/17, at 9:09 PM, lex wrote: > Hi my vote it for zak (selfie) i really do love making big moves. i would like to thank ryan la luca and allie for making my shadiness possible this round. it really means a lot to my soul. this round started off pretty chill considering someone i thought was my biggest ally left in what has to be the weirdest tribal in quite a while. but johnny fucked himself up by targeting allie and i to the people we are closest to in the game? like did he honestly think we wouldnt find out... but i kept my mouth shut and pretended i did not know what he was doing cause if there is one thing i have learned in this game its to never plan shit at the last second cause its not going to end well for anyone. so he left and everyone was like yes we love each other hooray great hair babe but that all changed when the willow monster attacked. BUT IM SAfE AND I HAVE YET NEEDED AN IDOL! WOOOO PALAWAN ME WOULD NEVER!

[survivorgreatlakes-blog]

Episode 4 - “I’d rather get spanked in the ass by karma herself” - Emmon

Oh my god! That tribal could not have gone any better than it did. It proves how strong trust can be, and that people can trust you back if you give them the chance to. Some of the Odawa members were just too social, and that was their downfall tonight.

BLESS. I am back to my tribe. Also literally went to exile for NOTHING since someone else found the super idol first, but whatever. I think i'm in a good spot now because of Queen Luke. ALSO BYE KAGE.

HAHAHAHAHA IM CACKLING FUCKKKK!!! All the lies I told Kage made him paranoid and then he went crazy. THEN I told all the people I trust that he's a crazy player and they believed me and now he's here in Redotion lake and I literally get to end his game omg. Poetic justice at its finest

Okay i bet all the records and I can die now.I didnt give 100% in the challenge because why huh ??? Kage is so ugly like his game is messy af.

I'm legit ecstatic lol.  An idol was used to send out someone I didn't trust, my whole former tribe is not looking to be in the best spot, and I'm about to go take me a little vacation at exile :D

AHHH! Tribe swaps are never fun, especially when it's 4-4-1. But hey, we just have to keep winning at this point. This next week is the week i went home the last time i played, so i'm praying history doesn't repeat itself. I'd rather get spanked in the ass by karma herself than get out 3rd again.

Hi! I'm Luke and I just did THAT. The plan worked perfectly and Kage was taken out thanks to me. I was not ready for the fuckery of rocks this early in the game because I could have been rocked out and I ain't no Paschal English, Katie Collins or Jessica Lewis! I also think it's extremely fitting that the Oscars are happening tonight when my alliance is talking about the super idol because the Oscar should go to ME for acting shocked that it exists when I have it in my pocket ready to use for when I get voted out. Hopefully I won't have to use it until merge if I make it but (:

So Matt is telling me whilst at The Shoreline there is a new idol combination that's longer the previous one and I sWEAR TO GOD! IF Y'ALL! MADE MY SUPER IDOL FAKE! IN EXCHANGE FOR A NEWER HARDER TO FIND ONE! I'LL CHOKE!

I love the fact that the swap has forced me onto such a weird position, I'm not the one being pagonged but Meskwaki members that stayed on their tribe might be completely Anti-Odawa which could be bad for me. I wish Kage luck but he might get eaten up by Andreas so ehh, I hope the other 4 Odawa can stick it out. About the abduction it was most likely someone on NuMeskwaki but it definitely could be someone here as well, either way Odawa is screwed and whoever it was just did this in an attempt to get Adam safe and now the tribe is 5-4-1 :]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] why is everyone doing this to me i don't know how to be an underdog

i'm tired and every time i go to the shoreline i regret it and i always forget to search FUCK

I'm not gonna lie I was pretty sad to see that I was separated from literally every Odawa member and I might not see them until the reunion call which is pretty grim but probably true unless there's another swap. I really don't know the dynamic of this tribe but I'm really glad we keep winning and winning because I don't want to deal with tribal and not live up to the underdog role the game is practically forcing on me. The way I see it Meskawaki 2.0 is pretty much full-on boner assault on Anti-Odawa which has me concerned but my weak ass can't do anything about it so whatever.

i was bored so i started drama with andreas. i really have no idea what kind of game i want to play so far.... adam being added is extremely interesting because meskwaki now has majority 5-4-1. I feel like i can convince people to vote on my side for a game-changing vote. :D i wanna get some threats out while andreas aka the comp master iss till in redemption

This is fantastic. People are LITERALLY THANKING US FOR TAKING KAGE OUT. I feel kinda bad, but he did it to himself. He didn't keep his mouth shut WHATSOEVER and he threw people's names around, especially mine, so that's grounds for elimination. Talk shit, get hit. I'm currently talking to Bodhi about the tribal council and he's asking for "reassurance we're still working together" and of course I say yes, but something doesnt feel right about it. He's using those petty ass cheeky emojis and it makes me not want to trust him. ESPECIALLY SINCE HE TOLD ADAM TO VOTE FOR ME! I'm leading him to believe I'm still on his side, but I can't say at this point if I want to or not yet. This is going to cause me to have to choose between allies, which I really don't want to do this early in the game. On one end, I have Luke and Eric, with Luke ready to flip on Eric whenever I flip the switch. I'm pretty close to Luke at this point, and to flip on him would be chaos. And then Bodhi, who comes as a package deal with Aidan and Christian. Hopefully, if worst comes to worst, I try to get Bodhi to vote Christian or Aidan since they're rarely around. Dana is in the middle with me, so we're going to have to choose if we have to go to tribal again. I plan on winning today though, because this is a challenge I'm actually good at.

Pet Peeve #1 = Attempting to correct me on the rules when you, yourself do not understand them......I love Matt but yikes, that's how you get on my bad side.

I knew Kage would try and slander my name once he got voted out. Sucks that I just pinned it on Eric and evaded attack...I mean, Eric did lie about the Super Idol saying it was just a regular one.....

Crow caws onward! Shook that we won that tribal immunity, but we did it! I've secured a spot in the final 17 without attending TC yet....good and bad, but still mostly good ;) Scott is clearly wary of me after my incident with Kage at Shoreline, but I actually don't need him :X I have a good relationship with both Kyle and Stoner so if the vote goes Anti-Meskwaki I should be in the loop....so Scott better not keep up this sort of untrustworthy attitude towards me or we're gunna have some issues....jeepers!

YYYYAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS I got invited into an alliance and its not by tribal lines! Me, Julia, Augusto, Scott, and Kyle.....it's perfect. 2 from both Meskwaki and Wyandot - 1 from Odawa (so no tribe has majority within the alliance) and we all get along! This will definitely ensure all of our safety at this upcoming tribal considering the others will assume it's Old Meskwaki vs. Old Wyandot.... And I'm also glad that I wasn't the founder of the alliance so that if it does get exposed, I won't take the (full) fall for it and can recover.....this is amazing!

And now I find out that it's because of Kyle....I KNEW THAT BOND WOULD COME IN HANDY! Hey, I might be at the bottom of this alliance, but I'm in it! Like Jeff Varner once said, the answer is yes! This ship is sailing, and I don't know where it's going but I'm ON IT! >:)

Things have certainly shaken up here in the Great Lakes! Firstly, Wyandot won immunity last round which was amazing cause who knew what would've happened if we did. Meskwaki went to tribal and everything went perfectly, Dana and Carson stayed and Kage went... thankfully. After that dramatic tribal, Emmon told me he found an Amulet of Abduction and asked who we should take. He eventually decided Adam, which I wasn't opposed to as he is someone we could swing on over to our side. Emmon, being the lovely person he is, had me in his thoughts when he made that decision which I appreciate. Adam came to our tribe and everything was fine and dandy. Everyone decided to have a sex party or whatever at the Shoreline and it was REVEALED by Andreas that a super idol had been found. First of all, why is everyone but me finding advantages? Secondly, HE DID THAT!! It jumbled things up a bit and because I'm a messy bitch that lives for drama, I certainly didn't mind that. Whoever has it is lucky af!! Back at Wyandot, I decided to create a lovely alliance with Kyle and Scott. My thought process regarding that was the simple fact that we all were on different starting tribes and could spill all sorts of tea to each other. I also want to save myself by any means neccessary to get to the merge, so this is somewhat beneficial. If the alliance will be successful, I'm not sure. All I know is that we have to put rubber to road and see how things pan out.

For whatever reason, I am looking in all the wrong places! The Shoreline doesn't mesh well with me apparently, so yay for that! I do appreciate the fact that the other tribe gets to see me, so it could build up bonds and whatnot... which is the plan! My intuition is on-point because I totally suspected something would happen this round and surely enough, it's a double tribal council! Now we have to break down what we've built here on NuWyandot and it sucks, honestly. I wanted to escape tribal for a few more days to make sure I didn't go home. ;-; Now we just have to wait for the free-for-all to begin and for the bloodbath to commence. I was complaining about not playing the game, but I guess you truly get what you wish for out here. What I'm trying to do is build good relationships with everyone here and make side alliances if I need to. An alliance that is in the works is myself, Roxy, Kyle, Crow, and Scott which I'm fine with because I had made an alliance with Kyle and Scott a few days prior to that. The old Wyandot tribe wants to stick together, which is lovely! Honestly, it would be the best if maybe Dan went home cause it'd be easier for people to flip on him... especially due to the fact that he probably hasn't connected with everyone, at least in my eyes. My best bet would be him or maybe Adam? We'll see, but I really hope I can win immunity or something cause it's crucial that I make it through this round... I don't wanna flop again ;-;

I've been weighing out my options for this vote. I could either A) vote for Eric, stick with Aidan, and have Aidan be voted out 4-2. Or I could B) vote for Aidan, my closest ally from day 1, and have him go in a 5-1 vote. If I pick A, then I feel good about myself, but then Eric might not trust me. If I pick B, then I'll feel like shit for voting out my closest ally, but Eric might trust me. I want Eric, Luke, Carson, and Dana to all want to stick with me because Odawa is very dead now. If I can line up these targets correctly, I'll just ride it out until the end. But fuck, it hurts me very hard to vote out someone as close as Aidan.