#it’s always a hassle though to have to switch between like 5 blogs to see which one it’s coming from though

[rainswept]

pros of having a billion sideblogs:

a lot of notifications

cons of having a billion sideblogs:

a lot of notifications

[coolest-in-chaldea]

hello! im quite excited for this blog fate fic blogs are quite hard to find may i have some headcanons of merlin realizing he has fallen in love and what a relationship would be like hopefully thats okay good luck with the blog!

Merlin Realizing He’s In Love Headcanons

note: hi! thanks so much for being the first request ever sent in!! Sorry this took so long to get to, I’ve been swamped with school and grinding on f/go for daysssss, 90 saint quartz but no 4 or 5 stars 😔💔 also I finally got on my laptop so anon is an option now for anyone wanting to request :D

- Merlin’s vast knowledge of pretty much everything happening at any given time is a little scary, so I don’t think he’s really the type to be dense. I think he’s more likely to pace around and talk to himself for a day or so while ‘deducing’ that his racing heart and flushed face are in fact indicative of falling in love. He’s not super serious like some of the other genius servants, he’s more-so just really awkward at handling social situations since he spent most of his life pretty isolated in his tower.

- Meanwhile, everyone else in chaldea are holding their breaths because the lack of Merlin shenanigans is starting to get suspicious..you and the Camelot servants especially are going ‘awww shit here we go again’ as you anticipate an elaborate scheme to come.

- Merlin definitely isn’t insecure, but I don’t think he’d have any plans of confessing at first because he’s never seriously imagined himself in a relationship. He’s perceptive enough to know that he likes you, but he doesn’t see any significance to it until it starts to get distracting!

- When he eventually starts interacting with you again, he’s 1000% more of a hassle than he usually is. He’s like that one kid in elementary school who just constantly bothers his crush. It doesn’t take long for you to grow tired of Merlin’s 24/7 bs, and when you finally retire to your room for the night you have a frustrated ‘why me?!’ moment. Tbh you’re just trying to figure out what you could’ve possibly done to prompt Merlin’s wrath, but the knights of the round table are painfully aware of why Merlin’s been constantly targeting you.

- Merlin’s an extremely talented mage, and I’m sure he’d switch around or transform some of your things, but I could also see him pulling some of the classic childhood pranks on you with the assistance of magic.

- You’re having a lovely conversation sitting across from Artoria, but when you get up to leave, you immediately trip and faceplant onto the floor. A very concerned Artoria asks if you’re ill and, trying not to lose your cool, you have to explain to her that SOMEONE apparently tied your shoelaces together with an elaborate series of knots in the shape of a flower. There wasn’t anyone else near you, but you both exchange an exasperated look as you know exactly who the culprit is.

- Merlin's flirting is still totally focused on annoying you and/or pissing you off. what can I say? it's just his favorite hobby! He's the type to believe than any attention from you is good attention, so he's more than happy to provoke you in order to put your focus on him. He's not that awful though, and he sticks to being a general nuisance and causing mild inconveniences as opposed to actually harming anyone. He does care a lot about you if he has feelings for you after all, he just has a...funny way of showing it.

- You will constantly be asking yourself 'is Merlin antagonizing me or flirting with me??' (the answer is both btw)

- If you're shorter than Merlin, he always interrupts your conversations by strolling over and using your head as an armrest. If you aren't, sike yes you are actually because the cheeky wizard is now floating to be taller than you >:)

- Merlin has literally zero chill and I think he'd continue to be chaotic af whether he's just crushing on you or you've been dating for years. He probably does like physical contact and cuddling, but he refuses to initiate it like a normal person. He'll eventually get comfortable enough to where he doesn't have to be affectionate via pranks, but don't get me wrong, that doesn't mean that Merlin ever gets calm or discreet about it.

- Any time you're sitting on a couch, chair, the floor, or your bed, regardless of what you're doing, he will just come stand next to you and very dramatically fall on top of you (secretly careful not to hurt you of course) and just chill there sprawled over you in whatever ridiculous position you ended up in. If you adjust him to a more comfortable position (his favorites are sitting with his back to your chest and your arms holding him or vice versa and sitting tucked into your side with one of your arms around him and his around your waist) he'll be more than happy to comply, but how you deal with your beloved needy wizard is up to you!

- Tbh I could see a confession going one of two ways, both extremes on opposite ends of a spectrum with no in between. Either

A.) he never officially confesses, but you get the idea and you both come to an agreement of being exclusive to each other (or having communication as partners if you're polyamorous) as well as comfortably doing everything a couple would, just with an official label OR

B.) He's a total showoff and performs the most absurd, elaborate and extreme confession with magic the world has ever seen. I cannot get the thought of those brilliant wizard pronoun images made by iguanamouth out of my head-

I'm imagining THIS but it's a confession like those 'will you be my date to prom?' signs people make 😳

[aoibaratraveler]

UK Road Trip Week 3

Ahhh late post was initially meaning to post every Monday but what can you do when you're on the road with limited signal sometimes and always wanting to look out the window and the pretty sights.

Day 15:

Woke up early and was finally able to put in our big bag of laundry into the wash. We weren't really able to do the things we thought about doing like going for a hike or a bike ride because we wanted to wait for our laundry so instead we took it easy and watched the last episode of izombie and once V was done with her skype interview we went grocery shopping for dinner supplies since we were going to cook ratatouille. We got back to the house and prepped all the vegetables and V made vegan chocolate pudding for dessert. Once everything was prepped and ready we decided to go kayaking for a little while before everyone would be back for dinner. Since there were 3 of us and only 2 kayaks, the bf and I decided to share one but boy was that a mistake because the bf sat in front with me in the back (so he was sitting in between my legs) and I'm not sure how but all his weight was on me and when I tried to position myself to paddle, it put so much strain on my abs and was the most painful thing so it was a struggle but at least we had a laugh and got to see a cool cave and some beautiful waves; got pretty drenched though. On the way back the bf and V switched and she and I sat together which made the paddle back much easier because she's lighter and I sat in front this time for good measure. When we got back, we quickly whipped up the rest of dinner (which was delicious) and chowed down. We then drove V's parents to an evening event and then the bf had a go at driving "Marvin", a classic 70's Volkswagen beetle that was gifted to V and her sister by their parents when they were 17. We got back and played games until midnight and V's parents returned just before we were to call it a night. V's dad decided out of the blue though that he wanted to show us the strangest card trick which involved being able to manipulate two rows of cards to be completely black and completely red even though we were the ones dealing it. Afterward, V showed us a curious card trick as well before we finally hit the hay.

Day 16:

Had a nice long catch up with V this morning before saying goodbye so much so that we didn't leave her house until 12:30...when we were expecting a 7 hour drive ahead of us...on the plus side when I mentioned to her parents that lately it's been cold while camping, her mom went and got us a duvet to take with us that she was planning to donate anyway. The drive was lovely and scenic but I was feeling a bit ill because of my indigestion so couldn't fully take it in. We were short on time since we didn't want to set up the tent when it was too dark and we only made one stop on the drive in a place just outside of Land's End called St. Just. It was a cliffside surrounded by lush green rolling hills and fields that was just gorgeous and gave such an atmosphere with the overcast. The rocky cliffs partially covered in grass and flowers were wonderful as they overlooked the clear blue-green ocean water. We sat there for a while and just took it in but I was sure that I could just sit there all day and still want more. It was most definitely my favourite stop by far. Afterward, we continued our drive from Cornwall to St. Clears which is just outside of Carmarthen in Wales and arrived at about 9:30 and were able to set up the tent even though it was already quite dark and managed to finish before the rain really poured down.

Day 17:

Today we experienced a downpour for most of the morning and day with the sun really only coming out at 5. We decided to leave early so we could drive through Swansea and then Cardiff. The clouds and rain didn't help the run-down atmosphere that Swansea was giving off with numerous shops that we drove by being closed down. When we got to Cardiff we decided to head straight for Tim Hortons which was nice since I was feeling a bit homesick although it obviously wasn't as good as what I've had in Canada. Afterward, we walked to the Millennium center which was the location for many Doctor Who episodes. After that, we watched the Liverpool game at an Australian sports bar and then headed to Caerphilly Castle which is the largest castle in Wales and had a nice little stroll before heading back for the night since we were still pretty tired from the previous day's drive.

Day 18:

As soon as we woke up today we attempted to put away our tent but struggled because of the periodic downpour that seemed to come down very hard every 10 minutes or so. We felt a bit bad though because the tent next to us was huge and the guy who was taking it down was on his own and seemed completely unfazed by the rain. We set off as soon as we could and drove along the Welsh coast/Pembrokeshire coast and again saw some gorgeous coastal views from St. David's to Trefin to Fishguard. It was especially lovely because the rain had cleared up. The cove in Trefin beach that is part of the Pembrokeshire coast national park was my favourite part of the drive and just beautiful. When we arrived in Aberystwyth we walked around the beach for a while and the bf showed me where he used to live. We even got pizza for dinner from a place called Hollywood pizza where he used to go most nights after drinking. Super cheesy with a buttery and crispy crust. We then continued our stroll and hiked up Constitution hill for some gorgeous views of the city. After a few minutes at the top, the bf was too cold so we walked down and caught a bit of the sunset on the before heading back.

Day 19:

The bf disagrees but I found the bed at this Airbnb that we booked for our stay in Aberystwyth super comfy and the pillows super fluffy and to be completely honest, it made me dread the thought of camping again but only a little bit. We got up and went to eat at "Sophie's", a breakfast cafe that the bf was a regular at during his uni days. It was super yummy there and the veggie sausages were on point. It was a rather humid day but again the weather couldn't decide whether it wanted to be Sunny or have a downpour. After breakfast, we headed to a place called "Devil's Bridge". It had loads of beautiful waterfalls and cool bridges. We stupidly parked in a spot that required us to pay even though the car park for the Devil's Bridge was free. The walk around the bridge and waterfall area took about 45 mins. There was a steep staircase there that, not gonna lie, terrified me at first. My fear of heights picks and chooses its moments and it had a pretty big one then. I'm totally fine with hiking up steep areas but hiking down is different so needed the bf's help then. The hike/walk back up the stairs of the place was certainly steep so my legs were shaking by the end of it. From the Devil's Bridge, we headed to Morrisons for some supplies and then back to the Airbnb to chill for a bit and watch Doctor Who. The bf and I both agree that the Matt Smith portion of the show is our favourite and that he's our favourite Doctor because he's wise but also daft and loveable. We concluded the night by having another stroll along the beach and grabbing some McDonald's...oh and since this Airbnb is working like a legitimate BnB, the room next to us was also taken so the night was really ended by us trying to drown out the sound of the couple in the next room having sex...lovely. 🙃

Day 20:

Today was the day that we were meant to hike Snowden so I got up at 8 packed my stuff, finished my chapter of HP that I was on and uploaded week 2 of my blog! By the time we got to the car though we realized it would be foolish to try and get to Snowden this late in the morning and hike it. Instead, we dawdled for a bit and then had lunch at a fusion place in Aberystwyth that I'd been wanting to try; really yummy fried chicken there. We then drove to the university that the bf used to attend and he showed me around the campus and the student housing in which he lived in during first year and recalled stories from that time. We then headed to Snowdonia National park since the bf's friend, T, lives and works there. She works in this quaint little book shop in a small town that had a such a laid back feel to it called Porth Madog. It was my first time meeting her but she was really nice and informative about what we could do in the area, she also reminded me immensely of another friend that the bf and I both know because of their mannerisms and colour of hair that they have both dyed the same colour. After chatting with her for a bit, we headed to the bay area near the town which was so lovely and serene and we sat there and read for a bit. When it became a bit cold we decided to head to Aldi for some snacks. All throughout the day I was feeling really sluggish and sleepy and no amount of coffee or energy drink seemed to help (only had one of each lol). The bf felt the same but he more so was just dreading our impending plans of wild camping but I was as well since we both had never done it before and didn't really want to deal with waiting for dusk to put up the tent and then to wake up at the crack of dawn to take it down. We agreed we didn't want to bother with the hassle, at least not that night since we were both tired and so we drove near the base of Snowden, parked in a lay by, reorganized the car and then slept.

Day 21:

Woke up at roughly 7 am and so did the bf and we both had the resolve to quickly get ready and start the hike up Snowden as soon as we could. Luckily there was a washroom at the base car park so we could freshen up. We then began the walk from where we parked the car (15 mins walk from the base) at about 8:45 am. I have already seen some quite spectacular coastal views in the UK but this was by far the best inland views I'd seen yet and my first time seeing proper mountainous views here. Such beauty, I'd never done this kind of hike before in my life.

I know I'm from Vancouver and I'm sure there are gorgeous hikes there but I never had my own car to get to them. I've hiked up Grouse Mountain and even though the views from the chalet are beautiful, it's just not as scenic a hike. My photos can't even begin to bring it justice. I was also surprised that it really didn't feel that difficult so I suppose I'm in better shape than I thought, I even seemed to be having an easier time at it than the bf. We walked along beautiful streams and what seemed like endless ridges and countless sheep just minding their own business. I might be a bit bias, but the bf is really just the best hiking buddy. He's always calm, reassuring, and well prepared and I felt the hike was that much more fun because I could share the experience with him. I honestly wish I could have filmed the whole hike to really capture what an amazing experience it was but I didn't have the equipment. Near the summit, there is a portion of the hike that is truly a scramble. I felt like a monkey as I crawled up the edge of the mountain; what an adrenaline rush but also thoroughly exhausting. It took us just under 4 hours to reach the summit. Even though I thoroughly enjoyed the hike up, especially so with the lovely weather, the summit was appalling. It was absolutely crowded with tourists, many of whom were inappropriately dressed for such a strenuous hike AND who were also drinking and smoking! At the top of a mountain!? Ugh. The summit was really small and there was nothing to do but maybe go to the unnecessary pub that is there and look at the gorgeous view. So after about 30 minutes, we decided to head back down a different way. The walk down was much harder on my feet and at times very painful but I persevered because if I were to stop and rest for too long then we would have gotten caught up in an obnoxious camp group that was on our tail. It took us 2 and a half hours to get back down to the base of the mountain although it felt shorter (so did the hike up) and the total time was about 7 and a half hours from the car and back. We walked about 31 000 steps and I just felt so proud of myself to have been able to accomplish that hike at all, I was happy for the rest of the day but that also could have been because of the endorphins. We had a snack at a nearby cafe after leaving Snowden and then drove to Betws y Coed and set up in a nearby lay by again feeling fully destroyed and ready for sleep.

[ninagodridge]

Societal Standards in a Social Media World

For my first blog post I want to speak to aestheticism, especially how it has shaped society and how I perceive photography at times, additionally how it manifests in my art. Now in a time where social media is so prevalent in how one identifies and individualizes amongst the many “ Accounts”.

Note: I will be using quotation marks for this post as a means to differentiate between “ Filters” instantly applied to through smartphone technology and filters, the individual lenses one can apply to one’s camera, and “Millennial terminology”. 

This revolution in cell phones has altered immensely since the 1990’s with the invention of the smartphone; where everything was instantaneous. I would consider this period of time, and up until now, instant gratification. I went from the owner of an Orange Verizon Envy, to a Blackberry Bold 9000 and then the trifecta, the iPhone 2. Each device died with stories attached and millions of images stored for a later day. My personal favorite was my iPhone 5, it got me through the last year of high school and sophomore year of Dean College. When I switched phones that school year, my friend Lauren had a hockey stick and purposed we shamed it up to relieve stress.  

What was left of that iPhone 5 was a reminder of how much smart phones had become another limb of our human. By having so many access in one hand, elements of the past was lost, though the camera industry was thriving exceedingly with the digital age, in my opinion, film might have started to become less of a mode to capture images and more as an aesthetic. One might argue differently, and I will agree now film has become easier to capture one’s natural beauty in modeling selections; that is a point that I will get to eventually. 

Digital is greatly consumed in our time with all devices we own as one human or household. Growing up all my baby photos were captured on a Nikon point-and-shoot film camera. Each image snapped went through the printing process and was printed twice. One for the album, and one for the boxes. In middle school, we had an album of CD-ROMs of all the photos we had taken over the years on our digital camera. The internet content at this time correlated highly with people editing and distorting images that were originally shot either DSLR or Digital. 

There became different layers to taking/editing photos in this age of digital with the instant gratification of having “Apps” immediately altering the image in the moment you snap it. Applications like VSCO, Huji, and other instantaneous filtered image “platforms” give the already desired aesthetic. The more I scroll through my instagram feed I am always tallying up the images where clearly it was taken on a smartphone and edited to look like film photography, or actual film photos that can be scanned for the ability to share online. 

With instant gratification, simplistically has been lost between capturing moments. Selfies are more common, group photos are a hassle, and Christmas card photos are sent online than through the mail. Recently I received in the mail from a high school friend, tangible photos of us throughout the years. It made me happy and I taped them to my wall of photography to admire. 

Society Standards change, how people consume the world is different, and how we photograph now is revolutionary, but deceitful. Film photography has shaped and inspired, and is continuously used by the modeling industry to rightfully capture the beauty of a human. Even if you took the photo on your smartphone, applied “ Grain” on the VSCO app, you are feeding into the achieved aesthetic that is film photography. Let’s say you go out of your way to get a simple 35mm camera to buy into the hype, you are taking away the instant gratification process, which actually gives you a moment to wonder, 

“ Just how much time and money will I have to add just to see these images?”

That is where consumption of money and societal status come into order and there is a reckoning within the smart age of photography. You can “ follow “ people on Instagram, VSCO, Tumblr and all other social media platforms where you see this aesthetic achievement unfold into what an individual wants to portray within this online world. 

You can take the person off the internet. You can remove the smartphones and online accounts, and hand them a camera. Film or not, what are they going to tell the world through their images? What aesthetic would they try to achieve? If anything, how would this change in capturing images alter there views of individualism?

[unproduciblesmackdown]

3 am’s a crazy time for it but it occurs to me i may as well give a heads up that i am like, for real at the present assuming that i’m gonna like, sometime in the very near future here be going offline again, in that sort of my ~plan~ (my one-step plan) is seeing if i can get myself on a bus (hopefully) and see if that can get me to the west coast. and from there i’ll just be like, well here i am in a place i’ve never been before, being unhoused for the second time but this time not living in my car, which is a bit different than living right out in the open, which i’ve never done. this, for example, is why i was looking up how to do makeshift stp devices. way easier to be able to pee wherever you are than have to find a place you can drop your whole pants, or an actual bathroom. apparently cutting the end off one of those plastic liquid medicine measuring things with the sorta spoon at its mouth works. anyways

i suppose it hasn’t necessarily showed but for a few weeks now i’ve def been feeling The Impending Pressure and it was getting down to the wire there not knowing if the Last Day Online would spring itself on me suddenly. but i can at least say i think i’ll have a days warning now and be able to say something with at least a matter of hours forewarning and not like, a matter of minutes. its been sorta wild though like, sorta assuming its like a Two Days Remain situation and in the midst of the unpredictability of depression, trying to just enjoy things as they’re happening, the simple stuff like chatting with people and being able to put my bullshit thoughts online...cranking out a fic chapter because it’s at least a better place to leave it hanging than it wouldve been otherwise.....just consuming this content that’s enjoyable and chill af.......i tell ya what—both in terms of being Fun and Anxiety-Reducing and Good Distractions and also, a great opportunity just to be talking to people on the daily which has been and continues to be absolutely fantastic—having been On that deh/etc will roland train for the past couple months has been a total gift. it was some great luck stumbling into that, seriously

anyways it’s weird! it’s weird thinking just like, i’ll suddenly do this thing and be on the other coast and just step out and be somewhere i don’t know and with no particular destination and maybe the lgbt center i looked up will at least tell me whats the best area to be in, sometimes they’re in the know abt that re: where’s a better spot to be homeless in than others. and from there, y’know, all i’ve been doing for years and all i can continue to do is absolutely wing it. and it’s funny that this all seems slightly less intimidating to me than it wouldve like, a year or two ago (even tho two yrs ago i was technically homeless lol but living in my car so like i said its different from living Right on the street) but honestly, obviously, it’s still very intimidating because how could it not be. i’m maybe not AS anxious but i’m still anxious and even though i know i could do it, i’d be stressed tf out and anxious as hell and shit while i was doing it. i mean, a crosscountry bus ride alone—i’ve never done that!! what if i mess up switching over to a different connecting ride between stations. bus and train bathrooms unnerve me, god forbid i have to get past someone to get to the aisle to GO to the bathroom. and, yknow, just a really long bus ride—how do you manage to sleep, how do i manage not to fall asleep at the wrong time cuz i doubt there’s an attendant telling you to get off at the right stop. though god knows it’s somewhat arbitrary where i’m deciding to go, i have no especial connection in one particular place over another, i think i have an uncle and cousin in CA but i don’t have the first idea where and i don’t know them at all

ugh. like there’s no actual way to feel good about it but if i’m gonna go somewhere it might as well be in a completely different place and i could try the west coast and i’m not one for making careful plans or thinking that making careful plans about your life works unless you’ve already got a lot of control about your situation, which i don’t. and it’s always been p inevitable that i wind up “properly” homeless, and it happens, and i don’t pretend it doesn’t scare me, but what are you gonna do? c’est ca que c’est / la vie. this way there’s a chance that A Big Change might lead the way for something better, and like hey if i die or some shit i die, which has always been a possibility anyways for the past like 6-7 years especially, what with how shitty i’ve felt lol. but i have no attachment where i’m at now and just. it’s hard to explain i guess if you’re not in the kind of place where i’m at but there’s not a lot of choices in the first place so, if i can choose the location, if it can be somewhere new where i MIGHT like to be for once, that’s better than not. and somehow so far i’ve managed to go with the flow surrounding big changes and sometimes wild situations, even if i’ve felt like crap and been super worried sometimes too. i don’t know for how many years now i’ve been Not assuming i’d be alive by the next year, but here i am having gotten this far, at least. it’s fairly impressive even if i don’t have any amazing achievements. believe it or not i’m pretty satisfied with my Achievements as just like, dumbass blog posts and fic/art and occasionally contributing something someone enjoys and getting to talk to people sometimes. it’s how i’ve been able to enjoy myself in the midst of some really awful times for the past like 6 yrs and i’ve appreciated it every day i’ve gotten to surf the net

like i guess it’s like haha, nerd, that half of what i’m worried about is being offline. but it’s a big deal being able to connect w the world beyond your immediate reach and distract yourself and say things and maybe even Enjoy yourself and also actually get to talk to people. but hey sometimes even people who live on the street manage to snag wifi connections somehow. i’d have to ask them how, lol. but, yknow, like i said, for a couple weeks especially it’s been like , Not Assuming I’ll NOT Lose Internet Connection and thus really trying to bear down on appreciating it. not like being offline for 5 months or so didn’t also make me appreciate it extra already. i was gonna say i survived it but i did get wildly depressed throughout like, august? september? probably both lol. anyways. what i’m trying to say i guess is that i’m not actually assuming i’ll be okay, but that only means so much because like, not to sound dramatic but i’ve pretty much never been okay on account of ive been just a half step away from living on the streets ever since leaving my parents house where i’d previously lived my whole life, which was an abusive situation. and also the depression and the years of really wanting to die which, at least 2018 didn’t have TOO much of that, in terms of feeling like it might be impending. now i can’t really be bothered, i’m just floating along and if i die i die, right. what i’m trying to say is, there’s not really any Good Proper option to choose where i’m definitely okay, so it’s basically about choosing between bad options, and with this choice i might at least like the location a little better, change of scenery, not as cold as here, i dunno. there’s not a way to just choose my way into being okay. it’s all a roll of the dice anyhow

also it’s weird but one thing about being on my own is it takes the pressure off me in certain ways and it’s a bit easier for me to Do things. if there’s anyone else to answer to in any way, i tend to just not ever decide anything and definitely don’t pursue anything. i’m one of those ppl who either has to live alone or with ppl they’re really really really comfortable with, and since i don’t have the latter around and nobody especially me can afford the former, it’s like, well, how is not everybody homeless anyway, right? and people do it. because yknow, you have to do it, it’s suddenly just your situation and somehow people get through every day. idk. learn as you go. what can ya do. it’s choosing between various bad options, i could also just wander into the mountains and die, but i’d rather not, and offing myself is Way a hassle, and also would be difficult, same as dying of exposure/dehydration in this middle of nowhere patch of mtns. i might as well try my luck at being in a place where you COULD maybe survive or something, and where i could at least feel like, if i do manage to have any good things happen, i would even possibly want to be in that area and be more comfortable living there. i have no roots anywhere and only have a No Zone (near my parents house) and so its sorta like, pick a random place to be!! lol. ahhhh

what can i say. it also sucks having to think “boy, in addition to not dying, hope i don’t get physically/sexually assaulted—also, how do people get water??” but......such is the way that it is. i don’t know. i don’t think anybody looks at impending homelessness and goes “i’m okay about this and not at all afraid.” and it’s strange to talk about how this is sort of ~by choice~ but it’s not exactly, in that i didn’t choose to only have abusive family and how even though i was working while living in my car it would never have been enough for rent probably even if i had someone to split it with and i also didn’t choose to not be rich in the first place and *the economy...... .png*

sigh. i dunno, it’s hard because i can’t talk about it a right way or long enough and get to a point i don’t feel intimidated or upset that once i Go Offline i’ll for real just be on my own unless and until i manage to get online for a moment again, in which case i’ll still be on my own, but i’ll feel a bit less alone, ha ha

anyways. speaking of trying to appreciate the simple pleasures of talking about whatever weird shit i wanna talk about and pushing myself to draw/write as it feels like it gets even more down to the wire—time to do that! 4 am and time to draw this weird meme & hopefully crank out the rest of this oneshot & maybe even draw again, and maybe again—it’s cool cuz i slept weird the other night and then got again weirdly tired in the afternoon and took a long depression nap w sorta fun, sorta bizarre dreams. augh. so at least i figure i’m just cruisin now, Not Sleeping-wise

i might have to ask a favor eventually in that there’s something really super simple i ought to look up, but i’d have a ton of trouble making myself do so because of anxiety, yknow how it is. but i’ll ask that if and when i ask it

[vividracing]

New Post has been published on https://www.vividracing.com/blog/top-5-best-exhaust-upgrades-for-the-ford-mustang-s550/

Top 5 Best Exhaust Upgrades for the Ford Mustang (S550)

The S550 is the sixth generation and current iteration of the Mustang pony car manufactured by Ford. As always, Mustang calls upon its performance roots with features like improved handling, high-powered engine options, and that classic design language. Being such a highly popular sports car, the Ford Mustang can be seen nearly everywhere you go, and, sometimes, it can be hard to stand out from the pack. That’s where the virtually endless automotive aftermarket comes in to offer a ton of options that can modify your Mustang to make it more customized. That being said, most enthusiasts like to upgrade the stock exhaust system to make a more noticeable entrance wherever they go while also enhancing the look of the rear end.

That being said, there are so many renowned brands offering quality systems that can really add some proven power gains to your Mustang in addition to better fuel efficiency and overall performance. We have compiled the following list of the top 5 best exhaust systems for your S550 Mustang to help you on your search. The following products are guaranteed to unleash your engine’s potential and blow the competition away. We based our list on factors like quality construction, performance gains, style and sound, and longevity. Be sure to also browse our complete inventory of exhaust components/systems for the Ford Mustang S550 right here.

1. Armytrix Stainless Steel Valvetronic Cat-Back

The Armytrix Stainless Steel Valvetronic Cat-Back Exhaust is the key to your escape from the mundane. Unlock the driving experience you’ve always wanted and the one your Mustang S550 was meant to have. Built with the strictest manufacturing standards, each exhaust system boasts quality that is unmatched on the automotive aftermarket. This system will take your Mustang GT Coyote to the next level with increased power, reduced weight, and an improved soundtrack. The precision-made Valvetronic exhaust delivers more power across the RPM range, especially in the low and mid-rev range. The effect on your vehicle’s exhaust note is significant, adding a deeply resonant and sporty sound that is sure to turn heads. At the same time, this system neutralizes annoying frequencies in the most critical RPM range to deliver a comfortable ride.

This cat-back exhaust features a sturdy yet lightweight stainless-steel construction that weighs less than the OE system. What’s more, it’s accompanied by a free-flowing design that offers a massive improvement in performance over your Mustang’s factory setup. Completing the look is the option of either quad matte black, chrome silver, or blue coated titanium exhaust tips. With Armytrix, you are getting a driving system that is unlike anything you have experienced before. The Valvetronic aspect of this system allows you to switch between quiet and loud modes with just the push of a button via the included remote or through the smartphone application. The advanced system provides owners with a better launch-start without losing backpressure by automatically closing the valves at low RPMs. When your car is driving at high speeds, though, the valves will automatically open to increase airflow for better performance and sound. 

Features: 

X-pipe, mid-pipe, Valvetronic muffler

Cat-back system with quad exhaust tips

Options: chrome silver, matte black, blue-coated

Wireless remote control kits (OWRC)

Buy It Here! 

2. Roush Performance Stainless Steel Exhaust

If you want a great exhaust that will improve the performance of your Ford Mustang and give you that signature muscle car roar, then this Roush Axle-Back Exhaust is the one for you. This system will give your 5.0L Mustang a more aggressive sound and boost performance levels well above the stock setup. The Roush Axle-Back system is crafted from corrosion-resistant T304 stainless steel and is mandrel-bent to maintain a constant inner diameter without kinks or creases. This design improves exhaust flow and reduces backpressure within the system to deliver better performance. The system ends with round exhaust tips also made from stainless steel and finished with a unique process that provides heat resistance so they can maintain their luster for longer.

That being said, you can rest assured that this exhaust system will withstand years of abuse and still look great and perform like new. This exhaust includes a single tip high-flow muffler that transforms the stock exhaust note to a louder and deeper tone with a healthy V8 burble when idling, building to a powerful roar at higher revs. Best of all, the muffler won’t dramatically increase cabin noise or drone so you can still enjoy a comfortable ride from the inside. The Roush axle-back kit can be installed with the OEM mounting points and hanger locations. No welding is required for installation, though some cutting is required due to the design of the factory exhaust system. 

Features:

All-new for S550 V8 Mustangs

Full-mandrel bending

Loud and deeper exhaust note

Single tip high-flow mufflers

Corrosion-resistant 304 stainless steel

4″ Flash-chromed dual wall tips

Uses OEM hangers and mounting points

No welding required

Buy It Here! 

3. Corsa Performance 3-Inch Cat-Back Exhaust 

The Corsa Performance Cat-Back Exhaust is a top choice for those who want to get better flow through their Mustang with a louder, more aggressive sound to boot. This 3-inch system is crafted from quality, corrosion-resistant 304 stainless steel and comes with 4.5-inch dual-walled black PVD exhaust tips. It’s custom tuned for that distinctive tone you want from a muscle car without any in-cabin drone. Corsa’s patented Reflective Sound Cancellation (RSC) technology allowed its acoustic engineers to create a drone-free exhaust tone styled specifically to fit the personality of the Ford Mustang S550. With mandrel-bent tubing throughout, this system also boasts a 53 percent better flow rate than the stock exhaust for better overall performance.

The Corsa cat-back exhaust is designed to add unique styling, increase vehicle performance, deliver a bold exhaust note, and provide an enjoyable experience for all involved. With this kit, you’ll get an adapter to mate with your factory downpipe as well as all of the necessary hardware to ensure a quick and seamless bolt-on upgrade. In fact, you won’t have to worry about welding anything to install this new exhaust system. So, swap out that restrictive factory exhaust with Corsa’s sport series and enjoy better fuel mileage along with all the other benefits mentioned above.

Features:

Patented Reflective Sound Cancellation (RSC) technology

Custom tuned aggressive exhaust note; No drone at cruising

Durable 304 stainless steel construction with 4.5-inch tips

Dual-walled polished stainless steel or black PVD tips

Flows 53.45 percent better than the stock exhaust

Easy bolt-on installation; No welding required

Buy It Here! 

4. AWE Tuning Quad Touring Edition Cat-Back

AWE Tuning is a world-renowned manufacturer of some of the best performance parts and systems in the industry. Engineered to perfection, the AWE Touring Edition Cat-Back Exhaust will give your Mustang a smoothed muscle car tone without any annoying drone. It emits an aggressive yet comfortable soundtrack that is perfectly suited to those who want an upgraded tone without going too over the top. This cat-back will not only set your ride apart from the competition, but will also provide a more enjoyable driving experience overall. If you are looking for a system that checks all of the boxes without throwing a check engine light, then this is the product for you.

Designed to give your ride a head-turning exhaust note with increased power gains and enhanced performance, the Touring Edition Cat-Back is a simple yet practical upgrade for your car’s stock system. The Touring Exhaust is a full 3-inch diameter system with two bullet-style resonators and an H-pipe all utilizing AWE’s 180 technology. The straight-through design reduces backpressure and adds up to 8 hp and 18 lb-ft of torque. This exhaust was handcrafted from T304L stainless steel and coated with a stunning diamond black finish on the 4-inch tips to add a bolder aesthetic to your car’s rear end. This combination results in a resilient construction with long-lasting good looks. Moreover, this upgrade is a completely street-legal bolt-on mod and will not affect emission readings. 

Features

Full 3-inch diameter cat-back exhaust system

Fully integrated H-pipe on all cat-back versions

Max gains of 8 hp and 18 lbs-ft. of torque to the crank

Straight-through design maximizes performance

4-inch double-walled tips finished in a diamond black coating

Handcrafted from CNC mandrel-bent T304L stainless steel

Direct bolt-on system for perfect fitment and easy install

Guaranteed to not throw a check engine light

Buy It Here! 

5. Pypes Performance Street-Pro Axle-Back Exhaust

Bolt on an instant five to seven horsepower to your Mustang with the Pypes Street-Pro Axle-Back Exhaust. This system features the popular Street-Pro muffler for the ultimate in flow and power gains with an aggressive exhaust note. The muffler utilizes an internal louvered tube with mini sound deflector chambers to deliver a more aggressive rumble to your V6 Mustang to make it sound like a V8. This axle-back is crafted from 2.5-inch high-quality 409 stainless steel tubing. The system ends with a 4-inch rolled edge slash-cut polished 304 stainless steel exhaust tip that exits in the stock location for that aggressive muscle car look.

The Pypes Street-Pro Axle-Back is designed as a direct replacement for your Ford Mustang and bolts right up to the OEM area without any hassles. In just under 30 minutes, you could be on your way to a new look, improved exhaust note, and enhanced performance that you can see, hear, and feel. You can also rest assured that this system will last for the long run thanks to its corrosion-resistant, mandrel-bent stainless steel construction. So, if you are looking for an affordable and simple upgrade that will pack an extra punch in the passing lane and alert others of your presence, this is the product for you.

Features: 

409 Stainless steel construction

2.5″ Mandrel-bent tubing

4″ Polished 304 stainless steel tip

Aggressive V8 sound with Street-Pro muffler

Provides excellent corrosion resistance

Ensures maximum exhaust gas flow to boost horsepower

Superior stainless steel construction for premium strength

Meets or exceeds strict quality standards

Buy It Here! 

[gwiinpatton]

Do you want to become a paddle instructor?

Kayaking all summer and getting paid? That’s the dream for many young people all over the world. But how? And where? Have you ever heard of summer camps? In America a lot of parents send their children to those camps. Kids are able to do a lot of activities there, like horseback riding, climbing, mountain biking and of course kayaking. Being camp counsellor is an amazing work and travel opportunity for young people during their summer. Are you interested in going to awesome places, traveling, kayaking and getting paid? Then read this! At the beginning of this year I was living in Sydney (Australia). I paddled once or twice a week in a manmade white water channel which was quite far away. One day my friends asked me if I want to come to America this summer and work with them.

“You´ll be in your boat every day, teach awesome kids on class I-IV and the Green River Narrows is 15 minutes away.” Sold. So I contacted the camp director straight away and started my visa application process. As I am originally from Germany it was quite a hassle to get all of my documents together, but finally I got my visa 3 days before I was supposed to fly out. This was in May. We had all kind of paddlers to teach. Absolute beginners, intermediates and advanced kids who would actually paddle rivers like Wilsons Creek (IV) or the New River Gorge (big water III-IV). Through the summer I took the kids on trips all over the southeast, taught them how to be a better paddler and had a really good time. I have so many awesome moments to remember. 14- year old Ward throwing his first freewheel of a waterfall, 8-year old Bobby coming of a rapid in his Fun 1 and smiling all over his face or little Mason screaming and throwing the sickest brown claw ever. This was just at work. On the weekends I spent my time with my workmates, paddling awesome rivers around the area. The most famous is of course the Green River which is such a magical place. Being at places like “Gorilla” and “Go left or die” is kind of unreal as I´ve seen those so often in videos of the Green Race when I was younger. As we were lucky with the rain we managed to paddle a bunch of natural flowing rivers as well. Living this life for about 3 months makes you tired. But it´s a good kind of tired. Later in August I owned a car in North Carolina, had a bunch of new friends, 2 new kayaks and I literally paddled every single day in the last 4 months. I would like to give a little insight in this camp life.

How does the summer look like? Every Camp is different. I will be describing the summer at Falling Creek Camp out of the paddling perspective. Of course there also is mountain biking, climbing, etc.

Camp was structured in blocks: 1. Staff Training The training was 3 weeks long. One week of wilderness first aid (WFR) in the NOC, one week of paddle staff training, where we checked out some of the rivers we would paddle with the kids and one week of in camp training, less paddling but more education how to handle a bunch of high energy children.

2. June Camp In June it finally started. The kids arrived for the first session which was 3 weeks long. Kids were good paddlers and we paddled class III max. Staff became a good team.

3. Main Camp In Main Camp (4 weeks) the advanced kids showed up. Paddling waterfalls, learning how to flatwater loop and exploring class IV was on the daily program for the kids. My freestyle background was definitely a massive help to teach flatwater lake lessons and some kids managed to throw cartwheels and loops in the end of camp.

4. 2-week camp 2-week camp was more for smaller kids getting into paddling. Teaching them how to canoe and do their first paddle strokes was very rewarding. I´m sure some of them will be awesome paddlers in a few years. Junior camp One week Junior Camp was for the very small ones exploring camp. We spent our days on the lake doing fun lessons on canoeing, which also included a lot of swimming. My workmates and I were on the peak of our own flatwater freestyle techniques after this week. In between those blocks or sessions we had the opportunity to go paddling for ourselves. The south east has some class whitewater 

What does an average day look like? Every day at camp is different. It would be boring otherwise right? There are in camp days. You will be working on flatwater with beginners, you teach the more intermediate how to roll or show the advanced groups how to flatwater freestyle. You basically do this all day with a lunch break. There are days where you are out on trips. These can range from one day to multiday trips which are 5 days or longer. Here you are camping with your group on different campsites, cook your own food and sit around the campfire at night. During the day you paddle rivers and teach all there is about kayaking. These were my favourite days!

Advantages and challenges of working at camp Let´s start with the advantages. – You are going to grow within yourself. By taking responsibility for kids on white water you will see the importance of safety and leadership. – You will learn how to teach. There are a lot of other instructors around you and if you pay attention and check out their style of teaching you will develop your own. – You know how to handle a group of children. To take care for 12 children can be hard, but after a summer of practice you know exactly what’s up. – Kids are awesome. Every day you will have at least one moment where a kid makes you laugh for some reason. – You will make a bunch of new friends. As you paddle with your team every day and share responsibility for 12 kids on the water you get close. And spending the weekends on hard white water let you get even closer. – You won´t spend any money. Accommodation and meals provided. And you get paid. – You will get a bunch of discounts. A lot of companies support camp instructors. Get yourself new paddles, a boat and all the gear for about half price! – You are able to raise the next generation of kayakers. As their instructor you have a big impact on the kids present and future life. It is awesome to see them grow and to be a role model. – Most importantly, you actually paddle every day. Leading easier rivers during the week and exploring hard ones at the weekend will make you a super solid boater with a big knowledge of safety.

Of course there will be some challenges as well. – There is a bunch of rain, all the rivers are in and it is Monday. Sorry back to work. – You work 24 hours a day. There might be nights where you are expected to stay up late if something isn’t right e.g. when little Johnny wakes you up at 3am really upset as he is homesick’ – You will get tired at week 7 and all you want is a week off. That’s normal but look forward to paddle with your friends at the weekend. – It is hard to get personal space. You will eat with the kids and you will most likely sleep in the same room or campsite as you are responsible. This will make you value your own space more. – High responsibility. You are with kids on white water. It´s your responsibility that they won´t get hurt. You always have to pay attention and you can never switch off.

And after camp? There is a lot of opportunity to do things after camp. Some people went back to college, some went traveling the states, and others picked up different work. I personally bought a little car of one of my workmates and drove to the Jackson Kayak factory to get my new rockstar and nirvana. Thank you JK! From there I travelled to Columbus GA and surfed the local wave for a few days with my new friends. After about a week I started a big road trip through the states and paddled in Colorado, Idaho and British Columbia. That is a story for my next blog though. It was definitely an experience of a lifetime to work as a camp counsellor and I would recommend doing this job to anyone who loves kayaking.

If you are interested text ben@fallingcreek.com Check out my Instagram for more impressions of my last summer and my travels: IG philmichelkayak

Do you want to become a paddle instructor? published first on https://realpaddleandpole.wordpress.com

[interiorstarweb]

Fall Checklist: Pressure Washing Away The Grime!

This blog mini-series is in partnership with Lowe’s! Thank you for supporting my sponsors!

Friends: I have picked up a new hobby. A passion project, if you will. The hobby is obliterating dirt and grime from various surfaces with water from a magic wand. Literally, it’s called a wand and it’s part of my new pressure washer!

Carrying on with the theme of trying to make the front of my house look presentable while it awaits restoration and I wrap up the huge restoration of the side of the house, I focused a little attention on the front porch!

From a distance, the porch looks…pretty OK? It appears to be mostly original, and the fact that it’s still there at all is the main bright spot. It’s going to need a ton of work eventually—everything from the cornice (which may or may not need to be at least partially rebuilt—the rot is bad), to the siding, to those gloriously large 6-over-9 windows, to the door, to the transom, to the floor, to the columns. Literally all of it! I used to think I’d tackle the whole front elevation of the house at once, but now I’m thinking restoring the porch may well take an entire summer to get right. Isn’t that center column crazy looking?

I think that’s what happens when a contractor temporarily supports the roof and removes the original columns to install a new floor (the original floor was almost definitely tongue-and-groove fir, not 5/4″x6″ pressure-treated pine decking!), and then doesn’t understand that the columns are tapered when he throws a level on the side of the original column to put it back. I’m presuming this contractor was male, because only a guy would be this dense. The column is tapered, genius! You’re doing it all wrong! It’s only super noticeable when you look at the porch head-on, but of course it makes me mad whenever I think about it. Poor beautiful house. Who hurt you like this?

IN ANY EVENT. I sweep the porch sometimes. That’s about it. To be honest it’s not like the porch is in constant use—looking out onto the street isn’t the most bucolic view in the world, but I do like to sit out there on warm days with a cup of coffee or a cocktail and my laptop, getting some work done and watching the world go by until I get bored of the world and want to go inside. Sadly over time I’ve definitely used the porch less, not more, which I didn’t think about much until I realized the reason for that is pretty simple.

OK fine I’ll show you.

Please be kind.

I’m sorry in advance.

GASP! I FEEL LIKE A MONSTER! Yes, for real: that’s how the vinyl siding under the porch looked until a few days ago. No, it hasn’t always been that bad. No, I have not doctored this photo for dramatic effect. Yes, I have completely neglected to touch it in five years because if I’m not actively renovating it, what is the point of doing even some light maintenance?

The point is this: restoring a house takes a long time, and in that time you constantly have to negotiate between quick and achievable solutions and long-term, more comprehensive work. Focusing only on the latter means that you’re ignoring the former (guilty!), and so everything starts to actually look way worse than it really is. When I look at things like this, my instinct is to just rip all the vinyl off the wall—can of worms be damned! But then I have to reign it in and remember that I will tackle that project someday, but not today. Today, I just need it to…not be disgusting. And if I’ve learned anything through working on the inside of houses, it’s that a good cleaning is the cheapest and fastest kind of makeover.

Just to cut myself a little slack, the whole house doesn’t look like this, I swear!!! The rest of the vinyl siding at least gets washed down a little when it rains, but these walls under the porch never get rained on, so all that road dirt and pollen and other dirt just kind of accumulates. Let’s try not to think too hard about what this may or may not suggest about my local air quality, seeing as I’d rather just keep living my life than figure out how to insert myself into a plastic bubble.

So. I described my gross situation to my fairy godparents at Lowe’s and asked if I could pretty-please have my very own pressure washer, and they obliged! #2blessed

As I have recently discussed, I have a deep and abiding aversion to equipment that needs gas or oil to work. Whether it’s a lawnmower or a weed whacker or a snow blower, in my mind they are all equally as complicated as an automobile or a fighter jet and I wouldn’t mess around with the innards of those either. I’ve had my car for like 4 years and only recently learned how to pop the hood…while I let the AAA guy replace my battery, which I’d sooner throw into the Hudson River than attempt to jump by myself. Way too risky. Are you nuts? I’ll stick to house stuff PLEASE AND THANK YOU and I just want my tools to work immediately and without hassle and this doesn’t seem like too much to ask out of life.

So anyway! My pressure washer is by Stanley, and it’s a plug-in model! And when you go to turn it on, it does so immediately and without hassle! It’s everything I ever wanted! Unfortunately it’s currently out of stock, but I got the inside scoop and they’re working on restocking them AS I TYPE THIS VERY SENTENCE so all is not lost. There are a bunch of electric pressure washers available, though, including this Greenworks one that’s evidently equally powerful, a little cheaper, and looks much more compact! Why didn’t I just get that one? NOT SURE. I felt like branching out into yellow machines. Like most new tools I buy, I generally don’t need the biggest, baddest, most powerful one out there, but I also don’t want the cheapest one because that often results in disappointment (and needing to replace it sooner). My Stanley machine lands in the middle/upper-end of available options, and seems more than sufficient to do the things I want it to do!

ANYWAY, back to my very disgusting siding. My basic strategy was to start up at the top of the wall and work my way down, concentrating on each horizontal run of siding on my way down. It took a few minutes to kind of get comfortable with it, and then it was ALL I WANTED TO DO for the rest of the day. I mean how satisfying, right? Included with the machine were a few different interchangeable nozzles for the end of the wand, which are helpful for different kinds of cleaning projects.

After giving everything a first pass, which maybe took about 20 minutes, things were looking about a thousand times better! DEFINITELY way more than a hose alone could have done, and way faster and less hassle than trying to do this by hand with a sponge and some rags which was my previous plan I’d been putting off forever.

Not all pressure washers have them, but one of the things I like about mine is that it has a separate chamber for detergent if you need something with more cleaning power than just pressurized water. It uses about 1 part of cleaner for every 10 parts of water, so concentrated cleaners that aren’t too gel-like work well. After I got most of the grime off, I filled the detergent compartment with regular white vinegar and went back for a second pass, figuring it couldn’t hurt and might help lighten some of the deeper staining. Lowe’s also sells a full line of cleaners for different applications—next time I want to add the Krud Kutter House and Siding Cleaner and see how that does! The regular Krud Kutter has become one of my indispensable cleaning products around the house, so I’m optimistic.

SO. TO REVIEW. BEFORE:

LIKE LITERALLY AN HOUR LATER:

I thought it would be cute to switch the coffee out for a cocktail and add a festive little lantern. This backfired because a) you can’t tell that the stupid candle is lit and b) my friend dropped by while this very profesh photoshoot was going on and I had to explain that I was not, in fact, fixing a cocktail to drink at 1 in the afternoon but rather to just take pictures of for the Internet, which I realized as it came out of my mouth just might actually be more embarrassing.

I TRY. But the point here is not my lackluster prop styling. The point here is my now positively LUMINOUS walls of vinyl siding that no longer look like they’ve been left to steep in a swamp for years on end.

It looks SO much better. One thing I didn’t totally know about vinyl siding is the extent to which it really does stain—you’d think plastic wouldn’t but it totally does. Most of the nastiness was surface dirt and staining, but even blasting at the highest pressure couldn’t get the deeper staining out. So it didn’t exactly achieve “it looks brand new!” kinds of results, but I blame the old vinyl (and MAYBE a certain someone’s years of deferred maintenance), not the washer. But this kind of improvement for a very little amount of work? I’LL TAKE IT! In fact, I really think this is a chore I can add to my seasonal to-do lists and do again a couple times a year to maintain it, and I know having my very own pressure washer will come in handy for ALL SORTS of things. I’m already giving my fence, garage and sidewalks side-eye. Also the street. Also my neighbors houses. What if I just start rogue pressure-washing things in the dead of night? Like I know I probably shouldn’t but just…WHAT IF? Watch out, world.

Fall Checklist: Pressure Washing Away The Grime! published first on https://novaformmattressreview.tumblr.com/

[billydmacklin]

Fall Checklist: Pressure Washing Away The Grime!

This blog mini-series is in partnership with Lowe’s! Thank you for supporting my sponsors!

Friends: I have picked up a new hobby. A passion project, if you will. The hobby is obliterating dirt and grime from various surfaces with water from a magic wand. Literally, it’s called a wand and it’s part of my new pressure washer!

Carrying on with the theme of trying to make the front of my house look presentable while it awaits restoration and I wrap up the huge restoration of the side of the house, I focused a little attention on the front porch!

From a distance, the porch looks…pretty OK? It appears to be mostly original, and the fact that it’s still there at all is the main bright spot. It’s going to need a ton of work eventually—everything from the cornice (which may or may not need to be at least partially rebuilt—the rot is bad), to the siding, to those gloriously large 6-over-9 windows, to the door, to the transom, to the floor, to the columns. Literally all of it! I used to think I’d tackle the whole front elevation of the house at once, but now I’m thinking restoring the porch may well take an entire summer to get right. Isn’t that center column crazy looking?

I think that’s what happens when a contractor temporarily supports the roof and removes the original columns to install a new floor (the original floor was almost definitely tongue-and-groove fir, not 5/4″x6″ pressure-treated pine decking!), and then doesn’t understand that the columns are tapered when he throws a level on the side of the original column to put it back. I’m presuming this contractor was male, because only a guy would be this dense. The column is tapered, genius! You’re doing it all wrong! It’s only super noticeable when you look at the porch head-on, but of course it makes me mad whenever I think about it. Poor beautiful house. Who hurt you like this?

IN ANY EVENT. I sweep the porch sometimes. That’s about it. To be honest it’s not like the porch is in constant use—looking out onto the street isn’t the most bucolic view in the world, but I do like to sit out there on warm days with a cup of coffee or a cocktail and my laptop, getting some work done and watching the world go by until I get bored of the world and want to go inside. Sadly over time I’ve definitely used the porch less, not more, which I didn’t think about much until I realized the reason for that is pretty simple.

OK fine I’ll show you.

Please be kind.

I’m sorry in advance.

GASP! I FEEL LIKE A MONSTER! Yes, for real: that’s how the vinyl siding under the porch looked until a few days ago. No, it hasn’t always been that bad. No, I have not doctored this photo for dramatic effect. Yes, I have completely neglected to touch it in five years because if I’m not actively renovating it, what is the point of doing even some light maintenance?

The point is this: restoring a house takes a long time, and in that time you constantly have to negotiate between quick and achievable solutions and long-term, more comprehensive work. Focusing only on the latter means that you’re ignoring the former (guilty!), and so everything starts to actually look way worse than it really is. When I look at things like this, my instinct is to just rip all the vinyl off the wall—can of worms be damned! But then I have to reign it in and remember that I will tackle that project someday, but not today. Today, I just need it to…not be disgusting. And if I’ve learned anything through working on the inside of houses, it’s that a good cleaning is the cheapest and fastest kind of makeover.

Just to cut myself a little slack, the whole house doesn’t look like this, I swear!!! The rest of the vinyl siding at least gets washed down a little when it rains, but these walls under the porch never get rained on, so all that road dirt and pollen and other dirt just kind of accumulates. Let’s try not to think too hard about what this may or may not suggest about my local air quality, seeing as I’d rather just keep living my life than figure out how to insert myself into a plastic bubble.

So. I described my gross situation to my fairy godparents at Lowe’s and asked if I could pretty-please have my very own pressure washer, and they obliged! #2blessed

As I have recently discussed, I have a deep and abiding aversion to equipment that needs gas or oil to work. Whether it’s a lawnmower or a weed whacker or a snow blower, in my mind they are all equally as complicated as an automobile or a fighter jet and I wouldn’t mess around with the innards of those either. I’ve had my car for like 4 years and only recently learned how to pop the hood…while I let the AAA guy replace my battery, which I’d sooner throw into the Hudson River than attempt to jump by myself. Way too risky. Are you nuts? I’ll stick to house stuff PLEASE AND THANK YOU and I just want my tools to work immediately and without hassle and this doesn’t seem like too much to ask out of life.

So anyway! My pressure washer is by Stanley, and it’s a plug-in model! And when you go to turn it on, it does so immediately and without hassle! It’s everything I ever wanted! Unfortunately it’s currently out of stock, but I got the inside scoop and they’re working on restocking them AS I TYPE THIS VERY SENTENCE so all is not lost. There are a bunch of electric pressure washers available, though, including this Greenworks one that’s evidently equally powerful, a little cheaper, and looks much more compact! Why didn’t I just get that one? NOT SURE. I felt like branching out into yellow machines. Like most new tools I buy, I generally don’t need the biggest, baddest, most powerful one out there, but I also don’t want the cheapest one because that often results in disappointment (and needing to replace it sooner). My Stanley machine lands in the middle/upper-end of available options, and seems more than sufficient to do the things I want it to do!

ANYWAY, back to my very disgusting siding. My basic strategy was to start up at the top of the wall and work my way down, concentrating on each horizontal run of siding on my way down. It took a few minutes to kind of get comfortable with it, and then it was ALL I WANTED TO DO for the rest of the day. I mean how satisfying, right? Included with the machine were a few different interchangeable nozzles for the end of the wand, which are helpful for different kinds of cleaning projects.

After giving everything a first pass, which maybe took about 20 minutes, things were looking about a thousand times better! DEFINITELY way more than a hose alone could have done, and way faster and less hassle than trying to do this by hand with a sponge and some rags which was my previous plan I’d been putting off forever.

Not all pressure washers have them, but one of the things I like about mine is that it has a separate chamber for detergent if you need something with more cleaning power than just pressurized water. It uses about 1 part of cleaner for every 10 parts of water, so concentrated cleaners that aren’t too gel-like work well. After I got most of the grime off, I filled the detergent compartment with regular white vinegar and went back for a second pass, figuring it couldn’t hurt and might help lighten some of the deeper staining. Lowe’s also sells a full line of cleaners for different applications—next time I want to add the Krud Kutter House and Siding Cleaner and see how that does! The regular Krud Kutter has become one of my indispensable cleaning products around the house, so I’m optimistic.

SO. TO REVIEW. BEFORE:

LIKE LITERALLY AN HOUR LATER:

I thought it would be cute to switch the coffee out for a cocktail and add a festive little lantern. This backfired because a) you can’t tell that the stupid candle is lit and b) my friend dropped by while this very profesh photoshoot was going on and I had to explain that I was not, in fact, fixing a cocktail to drink at 1 in the afternoon but rather to just take pictures of for the Internet, which I realized as it came out of my mouth just might actually be more embarrassing.

I TRY. But the point here is not my lackluster prop styling. The point here is my now positively LUMINOUS walls of vinyl siding that no longer look like they’ve been left to steep in a swamp for years on end.

It looks SO much better. One thing I didn’t totally know about vinyl siding is the extent to which it really does stain—you’d think plastic wouldn’t but it totally does. Most of the nastiness was surface dirt and staining, but even blasting at the highest pressure couldn’t get the deeper staining out. So it didn’t exactly achieve “it looks brand new!” kinds of results, but I blame the old vinyl (and MAYBE a certain someone’s years of deferred maintenance), not the washer. But this kind of improvement for a very little amount of work? I’LL TAKE IT! In fact, I really think this is a chore I can add to my seasonal to-do lists and do again a couple times a year to maintain it, and I know having my very own pressure washer will come in handy for ALL SORTS of things. I’m already giving my fence, garage and sidewalks side-eye. Also the street. Also my neighbors houses. What if I just start rogue pressure-washing things in the dead of night? Like I know I probably shouldn’t but just…WHAT IF? Watch out, world.

Fall Checklist: Pressure Washing Away The Grime! published first on https://carpetgurus.tumblr.com/