#it’s a very precious and confusing thing and im still finding out what it means to be someone

[tomatoart]

Bleegeghh teh 11th💉🥫

[chiiyuuvv]

[DAY 7] masterlist ᡣ𐭩 !

— i wanna be yours , the arctic monkeys 💿 ; cooking for the other pic by @starryriize

♡list : @yzerpoz , @imthisclosetokms , @rizzkisworld , @hyvelxve , @dogyunslover , @starryriize

Exam season was just around the corner, and minjae was starting to get worried about your health. Typically when you study, you often forget about your other tasks, like cooking and sleeping for example. You try to persuade your loving bestfriend that you'd be fine like any other time, but unfortunately minjae could see right through you, flashing back to your multiple break downs caused by pressure and frustration. He wasnt going to let that happen again.

Using the key you gave him to unlock your apartment door, minjae wasnt much of a cook, but that didnt mean he wasnt going to try. After spending time with you for so long, he observed your ticks and pleasures, taking notice of your favorite dishes and other things of that necessity. So he makes his way to your kitchen, laying down his groceries filled with your favorites on the island before opening his phone, looking up the receipe he had found before that looked tasty.

Of course, minjae knew you'd get mad for sacrificing his precious time to help you out, but he felt like it was his duty to make sure his favorite person was mentally and physically stable. Plus, he didnt mind spending time with you, no matter if his schedule was full or not.

Laying some of the meat that was required for the recipe in the hot, sizzling pan, he didnt even hear you open the door, too immersed on making the food perfect just to ease your stress. "Minjae," his head turns to the direction of your voice, giving you a simple wave as he continues cooking. "What are you doing?" Your arms were crossed, sending him a look like he just got in trouble by his mother.

"Go take your shower," he says softly, waving you off again with a smile, looking back at the pan to unintentionally miss your pout. "You dont have to do this, you know." You try to reason, but he wasnt going to hearing it, continuing to shoo you off. "Yeah, yeah, gooo," he pushes your body out of the kitchen, giving you a teasing smile. Although you acted annoyed, you couldnt deny the warm feeling in your heart, know that deep down someone cared for you.

Not wanting to waste anymore of his time, you quickly hop into the shower, drying your hair with a towel when you find that he was still cooking. He looked so.. boyfriend material, his gaze strong as he watches the meat cook, almost like hes the one making it cook faster. And no matter what he says, you want to repay him, sneaking behind his figure to give him a backhug, your arms wrapped tightly around his waist and your head resting on his back. He lets out a jump and his breath hitches before he tries to put himself back to work, ignoring how he grows hotter, painting his cheeks to a pinkish color.

"Hmm, you made me coffee too.." you take notice, mumbling in his back.

"I could be your coffee pot." He says without any thoughts, loud and clear as you lift your head in confusion. "Minjae wha-"

"I could keep it nice and hot, just the way you like it." He turns around, a smile unknowingly stretching across his face as he reveals his pink tinted cheeks. "I could.. be yours?" He tilts his head, confessing breathlessly.

"Haha.." you let out an awkward chuckle, there was no way he was being serious. "Very funny minjae." You pat his shoulder before beginning to set the table. Minjae puts his attention back on the meat. "Im telling the truth!" He says over his shoulder, but you still wasnt buy it.

He lefts out a big sigh, almost like he was going to drop the topic before announcing that the dinner was finished. You lead him to your dining room and he sits in front of you, gently dropping the plate of food on the table before cutting off a piece. He blows it off, "Ahh~" his lips part to signal that your lips should part as well, leaning over the table slightly to fully reach your mouth.       

"I'm not a baby."

"Right, you're my baby, now ahhhh~" you sigh in defeat, before leaning over the table to welcome the food into your mouth. Minjae lets out a celebratory clap, before cutting some more meat for the both of you. "How was your day?" He asks, popping some of the meat into his mouth. 

"It was-" you stop to eat some more meat. "-okay, just did some light studying to prepare myself."

"You're doing so well." Minjae says sweetly, cutting some more meat. "What do you mean? I just started." You try to hold back your smile.

"And you're doing well." He repeats, feeding you another piece. You smile back, "this is really good, minjae. Thank you." You compliment, covering your mouth as you speak.

"Yeah, well thats only because i made it for you." And just like that, your smile drops to an annoying sigh. "Stop flirting and let me chew this masterpiece."

"Aww, you like it that much?" You stop again, sending him a look. "What?!"

"Just feed me man!" Your mouth opens again to let the food enter but unfortunately minjae was in a teasing mood. He waves the fork around your mouth, but just as youre about to bite into it he yanks it away, giggling when you chase after it. "Minjaee!!" You whine.

"Fine, fine." He sighs in defeat, before another idea arises. With a smirk, he waits until the meat hits your bottom lip, before yanking away again, leaning his head down so when youre chasing the meat, you collide with his lips. He breaks into a fit of giggles when he pecks you, his cheeks burning red as he looks down, unable to notice how you've freezed in your chair.

"I um.." he gets up after calming himself down. "..was serious about what I'd said before. I'd happily be yours.. any day!" And with that, he gets up to wash the plate, leaving your mind to malfunction as he goes about his day.

[gamerbearmira]

Waazzup lol

Giant siren au

Antonio meet human child ( his age) im just curious to see how these completely different species of kids or babies interact with each other ( I don’t know how old Antonio is) it could probably start off with the human kid being lost and scared and antonio sorta goes hakuna matata just cheering him up or up to you how it goes, I just wanna see the interaction lol your ideas are better. (Maybe this would be one of the closest friendships between human and siren or up2u)

Also what r the giant siren madrigals fav sea food if they have any

from what i saw on one of yo asks, I can just imagine Luisa holding a human whos freaking out and she’s like “ what’s so dangerous about this tiny thing” Isa: idk 🤷‍♀️

Speaking of which What really scares them about humans? I mean these sirens are HOOGE right?

This one’s a little fun, joke au

Giant mer augustin meets jack sparrow

j: I gotta jar of dirt 🤪

Augustin: ( is just super interested cause there’s mostly sand in Encanto, and also cause a human finally doesn’t run off… cuz jacks crazy probs)

This mer Encanto au is awesome 👏 nice work 👍

Up to you if ya wanna do this ask lol no rush time is precious

WAZAAAAAAAAAUP

Of course I can answer <333 so Antonio is 5. Still the same age, Giant sirens only age weird when they grow outta their shells 🤠 as for interacting with kids, he essentially views him as another siren guppy. He doesn’t actually know he’s human until they’re swimming and the human kid has to keep going up for water. But he really likes him.

Human children are actually viewed as harmless. And giant sirens actually feel the need to protect them, especially if they’re alone. Often, they’ll try and protect the child from adult humans, even their parents. This can result in human children being taken from the shore, which is a big factor in the giant sirens and humans beef. Giant sirens don’t think human children are fit to be with adult humans, and will only return them if the child is obviously distressed, albeit reluctantly. Human children have been found in giant shells before when returned.

Madrigals like she’ll fish, like crabs, and lobsters. Deep sea fish are liked as well ⁉️⁉️ Specifically, off the top of my head. Isabela, Julieta and Camilo like giant squid. Pepa, Dolores, Agustín, Mirabel and Antonio likes shark. Bruno, Luisa, Fèlix and Alma like orca <333

Fear wise, Giant sirens know that humans can make things that can kill them. And for decades, centuries even, humans have hunted giant sirens for fun. It’s not as common anyway, but it still happens. And humans have made huge, and I mean massive spears that came launched into a sirens chest, which will instantly kill them. Not even a second to process, it’s an instant death. Giant Sirens don’t like ships. So they will crash them if the feel they have to.

Agustín would be very confused. Very 😭 another reason to find humans in general harmless. They’re so goofy, he doesn’t understand the fear. Besides hunters of course.

I’m glad you like the AU⁉️⁉️

[caspersickfanfics]

Hello :) hope you’re doing okay! Since you mentioned still being open to head canons and stuff- I’m currently thinking about how tighnari would potentially use his own sensitivity to noise and crowds to cover for Cyno if they were in some sort of public setting and Cyno wasn’t feeling well. Like I’m imagining the gang all met up to play TCG or something, and maybe it’s a packed night with other members of the mates around as well. Maybe Cyno is just a little too glassy eyed for Tighnaris liking and a little too quiet. He’s not paying attention to the game…he hasn’t touched his drink, he just seems…distant. Shivery. Not good…

Alhaitham and kaveh pickup on it but leave it to nari. Tighnari would make a big show about wanting to head out early due to a headache and ask Cyno if he’d walk him home as a way to get him out of there with out him having to look weak in public.

bonus points for Cyno being genuinely concerned for Tighnari, thinking it was real (he’s out of it, definitely feverish he doesn’t know what’s going on) and instantly starts checkin on him once they leave, offering to take his bag, apologizing for the noise etc. Cyno is so quick to move them away from the noise off towards the peaceful forest. It’s Only then that Tighnari stops him, slaps a hand to Cynos his forehead and lets out a fond sigh. “You silly thing, im *fine* it’s you im worried about. You don’t look like you’re feeling very well. And you’re warm…let’s head home okay? I’ll take your temperature there.”

the next day Cyno can barely get out of bed, and doesn’t eat a thing, but thankfully it’s a short lived bug and he recovers soon after many, many naps.

HI oml this is SO CUTE!!! (Also I am doing much better now, everyone has been so supportive 😭💕)

But this- Cyno being so out of it. “Distant. Shivery. Not good” is a GEM. And this is so in character for Tighnari!! I can absolutely see him just being like “This was fun, but I have a headache so I’m leaving now. Bye!” on the regular when he actually does feel bad, so of course it’s a convenient and believable excuse when he needs one. I could see Kaveh pushing things along as well, being like “oh yes, this usually happens with the noise, you both have a safe trip back!” And Alhaitham being like “I have a headache too” just because he also wants to leave lmao

Of course Cyno being worried about Nari, that’s so precious, I love them sm 😭 Cyno’s probably a bit grumpy that Nari lied because it’s confusing to his fever brain and he doesn’t fully realize it was entirely for his sake and not to trick him, which Tighnari just finds adorable 🥺 Kaveh and Alhaitham go to check on him the next day and he’s just NOT doing well at all. They’re impressed Tighnari picked up on it so quickly and relieved that Cyno’s getting the rest he needs 🥹

Also THANK YOU so much for sending this ask, I was really worried my recent post would mean people would stop talking with me and then I’d be even more bummed and seeing this in my inbox really made my day 💕💕💕 you deserve the world for always spreading so much kindness!!!

[spotsupstuff]

hi! ive been noticing your posts for a while now and ive been thinking about getting into rain world... would you mind telling me a bit about it? if not that's okay! im just curious cuz all these characters you've been drawing look really really good and it's kinda getting me hooked!

hmm hmmmm.... well what could i say... i'll talk about what i love about it because rain world is a wonderful game that i will never stop recommending to people, i think

i adore how "unfair" to usual game standards RW is. it makes it feel like there isn't really a point when you can call yourself a pro, when someone else can call you a noob after youve familiarized yourself with the controls. there isnt really an measurement of skill, sure you can look into some absolutely insane movement techs but the wonderful thing is that they are, at the end of it all, not important

i adore that the moment you accept the fact that this is just how this ecosystem works, you get to find such strange kind of joy out of it. i adore that the game is so loose about so many things including its lore because i can look at this "accept it when you die to become happier" thing and say that it could potentially mirror what the characters in the game (Ancients) should have figured out

i adore the religion in the game, the fact that it takes inspiration from Buddhism, i adore the karma symbols, what they mean, how they are written, how i can interpret them. the fact that i can look at this game and see something so very close to my own believes about life makes me so so happy

i adore the settings, the design, the vastness of the world both pictured and not, the impossibilities hiding in this world. the feeling of everything being so much it makes me want to cry everytime i take in how simply Giant the iterators are

everything is so big but small at the same time. the most breath-taking things become common and insignificant. the most insignificant things affect the most significant, holy ones, reducing objects and people of Unimaginable power and importance into nothing but desolate scrapheaps of nonsense. and yet these unnoteworthy scrapheaps circle back to being something precious but only to us. even though hes a wrackage, even though he is nothing more but trash now, we still love him because unimpressive things deserve to be loved too

i like to think that with some things in this game, something whispers "you're nothing. i love you. what happens to you affects me. you are nothing and i hope others will see the worth in you and love you too"

i adore the designs, i adore the glow of the overseer in the dark in the Monk campaign, i adore and fear the power of the rain, Moon's and Pebbles babbling and buzzing of their innards. i adore the glances we get of their cities, of the past, of the dead yet dear culture, whispers of history, the form of writing, even those stupid ads in Metropolis

i love hearing the opinions of both Moon and Pebbles. hearing from Suns makes me smile even though i want nothing else but to square up with them. thinking of No Significant Harassment and his easy humour even in such a place- his seemingly endless care, his struggles, anger, despair, mischievousness- the confusion and helplessness of something like them, a god brought to his knees- another glorious hard to comprehend impossibility

rain world is so wonderful and the more deeper you try to think about it and figure out what's happening where, why and how the more fun it is going to become

the best thing with RW you can honestly do is just dive in there and make your own opinions on all of these things. i hope u'll be able to take my wonder with you and use it to develop your own unique ideas of it!

n here's two fools vibin together

[issdisgrace]

Heyo, I literally love your stuff and saw your post about Rudy and age regression and I was wondering if you could headcannons with a reader who age regresses? With the cod boys if you don't mind!! Thanks!!

COD MEN WITH A S/O THAT AGE REGRESS

WARNINGS: Fluff, age regression, littles, caregivers, im a big ass simp

ALEJANDRO

15/10

An amazing caregiver. He has designated rooms in his house for yours and Rudy’s regression. He’s kid proofed all the stuff in those rooms. He watches you guys like a hawk, not wanting you guys to get hurt psychically or mentally. He makes sure all your needs are met, even if it means slacking with Los Vaqueros. He genuinely cares so much that it hurts his heart sometimes.

GAZ

8/10

Bare with him, please. He tries his absolute best to take care of you. He spends hours researching hell he will even ask Price for advice. He’s definitely the type to sit on the ground and play with you, if that’s what you like. I feel like he’s one of the best storytellers. He is very imaginative, so he can come up with these stories on the spot. He will entertain you for hours with stories if you heart so desires.

GHOST

8.5/10

He is very confused in the beginning, but he does research and collects his thoughts. Your relationship maybe rocky at times, but he is surprisingly soft and gentle with you. I genuinely believe that your guy's relationship heals Ghost trauma. Your relationship heals parts of himself that he didn’t ever know about. Over all it’s an amazing loving relationship.

KÖNIG

9/10

Life is basically like sunshine and daisy when you're with König. He is very anxious and over protective but he is very careful to not let these things affect you. He wants you to be able to relax and have no worries in that pretty little head of your. He likes buying you a lot of stuff animals and action figures/dolls if you’re into to that.

KEEGAN

7/10

Keegan is a bit distant at times. But when he is there and present, he cares for you with his whole heart. He likes to watch you while you go about. He is likes lurking and due to his lurking he makes sure all your needs are met. May or may have not accidentally scared you multiple times do to his lurking.

PRICE

100/10

The most and best prepared out of all these guys. I feel he has prior experiences with past partners. He knows everything and so when he finds out, he will probably just pop to a shop if he can to get you some stuff. He always has an eye on you since he learned of your regression. He doesn’t want you to get hurt or anything of that sort. VERY PROTECTIVE. He loves you so much and thinks you're the cutest.

RUDY

10/10

So you and Rudy are Alejandros littles. I think Rudy is an even more of a sweet and precious boy than he normally is when he regresses. He is a really good time. He loves playing with stuff animals and drawing together. He is very happy and has a constant blush on his face. It’s just so adorable.

ROACH

9.9/10

He specialises in a lot of sensory stuff because he knows that it can trigger both of you guys. He has the best blankets and pillows at hand all the time. Your life is a little slice of paradise due to all the loving effort Roach puts in. He goes above and beyond all of these men. It’s just a fact he already has everything curated and done.

SOAP

7.8/10

Very childish but is still really good at care stuff. He likes to make you laugh. He thinks it’s the sweetest sound in the world. He will learn how to cook and clean and do all that type of stuff just so he can adequately take care of you. But I will say you all have a couple bumps in the road, but over all everything is good.

[gojology]

— gojo, megumi, yuuji | crushing on dense fem reader

the request :

pairing : gojo, megumi, and yuuji x dense fem! reader warnings : cursing, no proof reading wordcount : 1212 a/n : anon i cant believe u asked for hcs when im this bad at writing them ... girl r u good ?

GOJO SATORU  ‧₊˚✩彡.

☆ Now, Gojo is as straightforward as it gets with relationships. 

☆ When Gojo first realized he had a thing for you, he was all for it! I mean, what’s not to like about you? 

☆ He obviously forgot how dense you are. Any expression of love towards you was fruitless, it was like you didn’t give another thought. 

☆ He would wrap a hand around your waist, call you affectionate nicknames, show you off to a very disgusted  and uninterested Yuuji and Nobara. Rarely did Megumi join in, he was probably off doing his own thing.

☆ You just thought he was being friendly. 

☆ He finds your density kind of enduring, often finding himself studying you, just to make sure no one’s hurting you. 

☆ Gojo felt like some sort of guardian angel looking after you 24/7, but he doesn’t mind watching you.

☆ I feel like sometimes he just straight up says, “I like you.” you chalk it up as some sort of... twisted joke. And he’s getting frustrated at this point.

☆ When you’re off campus, off doing your own thing, he discusses with Shoko, asking her what his best chances are. 

☆ Gojo absolutely follows every advice Shoko gives him, even if it’s stupid, because honestly he hasn’t got any experience with a girl as dumb as you. He’s tried everything at this point!

☆ When you and Gojo are doing your own thing, alone, he leans in real close to you, and it takes everything in him to not kiss your lips. That’s what Shoko thinks might work, near physical contact was enough of a sign to say, “Hey! I like you.” 

☆ Shoko always says that you probably won’t realize any approach other then a direct one, and this was direct enough right?

☆ This piece of advice he particularly ignores, though. He doesn’t go all the way with the advice, he’s scared of ruining the friendship, no matter what Shoko says.

☆ He values you as a friend so deeply, you always seem to forget that he’s the most powerful, and he enjoys the normal relationship between the two of you.

☆ Gojo never, ever wants to lose that. He’d rather call you pumpkin then the rest of his life, while you obliviously stared back, then call you another friendship gone haywire. 

☆ So you two just look at each other, all silent. You’re obviously curious why he’s staring at you with a starving pair of eyes, but eventually he laughs it off and hands you his favorite candy that he always kept in his pocket. 

☆ He hands you your favorite flavor, because he always remembers it. 

☆ You walk away, chewing and rolling the candy around on your tongue, and he wishes he could taste how your mouth tastes afterward. 

MEGUMI FUSHIGURO ‧₊˚✩彡.

☆ Poor Megumi over here, he’s basically a tsundere.

☆ Megumi hate’s confrontation, so he does EVERYTHING in his power so he doesn’t have to tell you directly.

☆ Nonetheless, he has a horribly bad crush on you. He also has trouble hiding it.

☆ Thing is, he doesn’t want to fuck up the friendship. After all, he was your “study partner”. 

☆ You’d often find yourself in his room, analyzing old Jujutsu writings for Gojo’s homework assignments. (Why the guy assigned homework, you have no idea.)

☆ Megumi was silent. He didn’t like speaking unless being spoken to. This changed with you. 

☆ While you’re writing or doodling in your journal, he sneaks glances at you. 

☆ Once in a while, he’ll realize you’re writing a word incorrectly.

☆ Instead of taking an eraser like any normal person does, Megumi insists that he would help you write out the words

☆ Holding your hand, he’d guide you, muttering the letters under his breath.

☆ He wishes he could hold your hand forever, it’s warm compared to his cold ones, and then his mind wanders.

☆ Wondering just how warm your cuddles get. 

☆ Blushing ferociously now, he looks down at the paper, and you look at him, confused as to why he stopped writing. 

☆ He’s incredibly stiff, he doesn’t wanna think about that while you’re right in front of him. You tap him a few times, and he jolts back to Earth. 

☆ You ask him what he was doing, but he doesn’t reply, instead stroking your hand’s skin and grumbling words you couldn’t understand. 

☆ You sit there, maybe he has anxiety, that’s why he’s stroking you like a therapy cat. 

☆ Megumi’s weighing out the positives and negatives of asking you out right this second, but his anxiety prevents him. He touches your skin subconsciously. 

☆ Negatives always seem to win though, he doesn’t wanna risk losing his friend. He turns back to look at your face once more, fluttering his long eyelashes, taking a deep breath in, and continuing the assignment. 

☆ “Next time” is all that echoes in the back of his mind.

☆ You just think it’s a bit weird, to be honest. Why does he look at you that way?

☆ You just think that he has his moments of too intensely thinking. 

ITADORI YUUJI ‧₊˚✩彡.

☆Like you, Yuuji’s also dense. ☆ Unlike you, he has the power and the courage of asking Gojo what these feelings were. ☆ “Yuuji-kun, have you ever felt love for someone special before?” ☆ “No, what’s that, Gojo-senpai?”  ☆ “That’s the feeling you get around (Y/N). You think she’s cute, I bet that.” ☆ That’s how the bastard found out he had a crush on you, through his equally as stupid teacher. ☆ This clearly spelled out disaster. ☆ Whenever you and Yuuji went out on missions, Yuuji would offer to cover for your role in the mission as well, claiming that you needed a break. ☆ “Why?” you’d ask ☆ “Because, I like you.” ☆ “Wow, Itadori-kun! You’re really nice!” you say, a smile on your lips, “Honestly though that’s a lot of work on your shoulders, I think I’ll-” ☆ He would stop you in his tracks, and kind of look at you. ☆ Yuuji thinks your work ethic is precious, and he deeply admires that. ☆ He also thinks your density is really cute, but he worries that he’s not masculine enough for you. ☆ This is why he tries to appear more, “macho” as he says it, around you ☆ But inside, he’s soft, and soft for you only. ☆ Despite his usual friendly and carefree personality, he would punt someone into the horizon if they looked at you different. He was overprotective that way. ☆ But you never truly got the hint, and he always was upset by this, in which Gojo would comfort him, and the cycle would restart. ☆ But here’s the problem: he doesn’t want to ruin the relationship. As much as he trusts Gojo, nothing was showing out of his obvious flirting, and eventually his confidence wore out. ☆ Sometimes he still tries talking to you in that flirty manner, but you just tilt your head and kinda go, “What?” ☆ Giving you a big, reassuring grin, he gives you a thumbs up. ☆ He sighs as he does so, telling you, “Nevermind.” and talks about something else. ☆ Deep down, he’s cursing himself out, he thinks it’s all his fault and not you just being stupid.

[ssamie]

off limits.

·˚ ༘⌗ someone had caught langa's attention, and reki being the supportive friend that he is, decided to help langa score a date with them, all without knowing they were joe's precious little sibling.

·˚ ༘⌗ hasegawa langa x gn!reader

·˚ ༘⌗ warnings: langa's shitty flirting, fluff, im using ASH as ur name in S lol sorry if u hate it, long-ish ig

gen masterlist.       sk8 masterlist.

"yeah! go ASH!" "damn! they're so cool!"  "ASH! come take a picture with us!"

you simply grinned and waved to the crowd as they repeatedly chanted your name and cheered you on. you had just won a beef against your very own brother kojiro, or better known as JOE, and everyone was going crazy.

"well then, i win so you know what to do, right JOE?" you smirked tauntingly as your brother sighed in exasperation "yeah, yeah" he rolled his eyes "im doing laundry for this month as we previously agreed upon" he said

you snickered and waved him goodbye before rushing off to MIYA. you and him were fairly close friends since you were both candidates for japan's national team and often meet up outside of 'S'

"woah.." langa said with a gasp as his eyes followed your form. reki raised a brow in confusion as he followed langa's line of sight.

"langa? whats wrong?" reki asked. "ASH.." langa responded. his eyes were glimmering with amazement and adoration as a bright and sparkly aura surrounded him.

"oh, them?" reki hummed "they're really cool, huh? their tricks were really amazing" he said

langa simply sent you one last glance before reluctantly averting his attention towards reki. "reki! i think.. i think i like ASH" langa admitted with a blush

"eh?! like, like like them? or-" langa cut him off with a frantic nod, making reki scream out in surprise

"eh?! that's awesome! go talk to them then!" reki exclaimed as he tried to push langa towards your direction. "no! i can't!" langa panicked as he tried to plant himself in his spot

"yeah you can!" reki laughed "just go for it!" langa shook his head in distress and tried to run away, although reki caught him by his collar just in time.

"but i don't know what to say! they might find me weird!" langa exclaimed. reki hummed before nodding in agreement. "yeah, you're right. then you'll never get a chance if that happens"

langa paled as a look of dread and fear had dawned upon his features. reki immediately took notice and frantically patted his back to calm him down. "no, no! it's fine! you just gotta practice what to say first so you don't mess it up when you finally talk to them!" reki said

langa nodded with determination. "you're right, reki" he said. "so you'll help me right?" he sent reki an expectant look, making the latter gulp.

"ofcourse!" reki exclaimed "with my help, you'll score a date with them in no time!"

"um-hey, uh how's it-"

"no!! wrong wrong wrong!!" reki exclaimed as he shook his head in disappointment "we've gone over this! we've practiced for a week straight!" he sighed out in exasperation

they were currently at a convenience store parking lot, practicing langa's lines and flirting skills for when he finally musters up the courage to approach you.

"just be cool! be natural! you're too stiff" reki said as he lightly punched langa in the chest. "it's too hard" langa sighed dejectedly "i can't do it"

reki frowned and slapped langa's back, making him yelp. "you can do this! miya said they're really nice so you don't have anything to worry about" reki said in reassurance

"yeah, i guess" langa said with a pout "but im just-"

he yelped as he suddenly collided with another person, his foot had been caught up in his board, causing him to slip and for the other to stumble.

"ah, im so sorry!" you said as you frantically grasped his wrist just before he could fall to the ground. thankfully, you were able to balance yourself and catch him in the process.

"wait-" reki's eyes widened "you're.. ASH?!" you then grinned and set him a wave "hey! you're reki right? miya mentioned you a few times now" you said

"but you probably shouldn't address me as that when we're outside. it's against the rules you know?" you mused with a kind smile "just call me y/n"

"i-i uhm.. you-" langa stammered out. "hm?" you hummed in confusion as you turned around to face a red-faced langa, who seems to be in the brink of combustion at the moment. you followed his eyes down to your hand, which was still holding his wrist, and immediately let go. "oh, sorry dude! you're the rookie right?" you cooed out with a grin

"nice to meet you. i've seen you skate before, you're really good" you complimented him with a suave smirk

"..." langa didn't respond and simply looked at you with sparkling eyes and a blank expression, making reki face-palm in the background

"uh, you alright, langa?" you asked with a chuckle "you look real red right now" you grinned and jokingly elbowed him "it's not cause you like me or anything right?" you teased

"NO!" langa exclaimed. both you and reki blinked in shock while langa simply shook his head with a shaky smile "i mean-no i do! but not like that! but i don't don't like you-"

he suddenly cleared his throat upon receiving a silent signal from reki, making you smile in amusement. "so uh- what's an eye candy like you doin in a place like this?" he asked in a 'flirtatious' tone, though it only came out awkwardly and forced due to his aloof and blunt nature.

you chuckled and shrugged nonchalantly "not much. just shopping" you replied as you showed them the grocery bags filled with ingredients for kojiro's restaurant. "why? wanna take me elsewhere?" you teased

you laughed and lightly nudged him with your hip. " 'm just messing with you! you're too serious, loosen up will you?" you chuckled. "r-right!" langa laughed nervously as he silently marveled at you and your angelic laughter. "seriously," you grinned "you don't have to be so nervous. i don't bite you know?"

"well, unless you want me to" you grinned cheekily as a his face exploded into a bright shade of red. "oh.. is that so.." he stammered out

langa had once again fallen into silence as he settled for ogling at your side profile with his eyes sparkling with adoration. reki sweat dropped and nervously chimed in as to not make things awkward.

"so, y/n-san" reki said with a nervous smile "you're a really cool skater! and you also remind me of someone i know" he said

"oh well then you're probably talking about my brother. i heard you often hang with him in and outside of S" you said

"your brother?" reki and langa mumbled out in confusion. you nodded "yeah it's-" you were cut off by the ringing of your phone, making you shoot the two boys an apologetic smile and a wave goodbye.

"sorry guys, i gotta go. but maybe next time we can hang!" you said as you start to skate away. but just before you could get too far, you stop in your tracks and shoot langa a wink.

"catch you later, snow~" you cooed before finally disappearing from their sight, leaving behind a flustered langa and a surprised reki.

langa blinked one last time before dramatically falling down onto the floor like a melted puddle, his face bright red and a hazy smile grazing his lips.

"LANGA?!?"

"geez, you really need to keep your shit together." reki sighed "y/n was clearly flirting with you and you didn't even make a move." he said

langa frowned and nodded, "yeah, i guess i was just nervous. and it's a little awkward too.." he said. reki deadpanned and slapped him by his nape "dumbass! it's only awkward cus you make it like that!" he exclaimed

langa winced and shuffled away from reki "ouch! yeah, yeah, i'll do better next time.." he muttered with a pout.

they stopped as they arrived at kojiro's restaurant, they were there to meet up with the others for a friendly hangout. "hey guys!!" reki greeted them with a grin

"oh, the slime is here." miya said as he continued to play on his phone, not even looking up once. "oi! im no slime!" reki whined as he tackled miya in a hug, much to the latter's annoyance.

"hm? what's wrong, langa?" kaoru asked with a hum as he took notice of langa, who seemed more out of it that usual.

"oh, langa's thinking of ways on how to flirt with this person he likes!" reki exclaimed with a cheeky grin as he teased his friend. "a crush?" kaoru mused

"you're too young for that" joe said with a laugh "but if you need help, then im definitely the right person to go to" he followed up with a smirk

kaoru simply bonked him in the head with his fan and sighed. "you are definitely the worst person to come to." he said

joe gritted his teeth and glared at his pink haired friend, before huffing and facing langa once more. "so, who exactly is this crush of yours?" he cooed

langa blushed and sheepishly turned his head away, "its no one.." he muttered.

"it's ASH." miya chimed in with a smug grin "aka y/n. those two slimes have been asking me about them for the past week. it's honestly sad." he snickered.

kaoru and kojiro's face paled while langa simply turned into a blushing mess.

"wait-" kaoru gulped "y/n.. y/n as in kojiro's-"

"nii-san!" your voice emitted from the kitchen "i finished putting the groceries in the back room" you said

you walked into the room, untying the apron around your waist as you make your way towards your brother.

only then did you notice all their eyes trained on you, especially langa, who looked like his eyes were about to pop off with how much he'd widened them.

"umm.." you mumbled out sheepishly "is everything alright?" you asked

kojiro slowly walked up to langa with a dark look in his eyes, much to langa's horror. "oi, rookie." kojiro called out, his tone laced with malice

langa yelped and immediately shielded himself behind reki "i can explain.." langa muttered with a nervous smile

"explain what?" kojiro scowled. his muscular arms pulled you towards him, much to your confusion, and held you protectively against his chest.

"that you're flirting around with my baby sibling!!?!" kojiro exclaimed

"NO!" langa denied "well uh- kind of.. but i only did it once and-reki! help me!" he gave reki a look of helplessness.

reki gulped as kojiro's glare had averted towards him. "ah, joe! it's just that-langa here thought y/n-san was very alluring, right?" he mused, to which langa nodded along.

"so uh-we asked miya some things about her.. but miya never told us they was your sibling!!" he exclaimed

miya simply gave them a cat-like grin, smiling and giggling to himself as he innocently looks around the place.

"that doesn't excuse your actions, you punks!" kojiro bonked them both in the head

"let me get this straight.. y/n is off limits. got that?" he glared at langa "no flirting, no dating, no boyfriends."

you scowled and wiggled yourself free from his hold. "what the hell are you talking about?" you crossed your arms over your chest as you look at your brother expectantly.

"wha- y/n you're too young!" kojiro shrieked "im not a kid, you know?" you sweat drop

"you're younger than me, which means you're a kid. so no boyfriends." kojiro huffed "kaoru help me out here!!" he said

kaoru simply sipped on his drink and sighed. "i personally don't have any problems if y/n chooses to date." he says in a calm tone

but it soon changed into a look of malice as he looms over langa's shoulder. "but if you hurt them, i will surely be teaching you a lesson." he muttered in a low tone "alright?"

langa yelped and nodded. "right!" he exclaimed

you sighed and bonked both kaoru and kojiro in the head, pushing them away despite their protests, and approached langa.

"don't mind them." you said "they're just overprotective. most of it were empty threats anyways!" you laughed

langa gulped as he looked at the two over your shoulder with dread. "im pretty sure those threats weren't empty..." he muttered

you laughed and took his hand, flipping it over to reveal his wrist. you then took a pen from your pocket and wrote your number down onto his skin.

"i gotta go, but when you have time, give me a call okay?" you cooed with a smirk

langa watched with sparkling eyes as you gave him a flirty wink before taking your board and walking out of the restaurant.

"bye~" you cooed with a wave before skating away

"i- what?! did my baby sibling just give some guy their number?!" kojiro shrieked in horror

"you act like you don't do the same thing in a daily basis" reki sweat dropped

reki then turned to langa, who was still staring at the digits on his wrist with a blushing face. "so, are you gonna call them?" reki mused

"like hell you will!!" kojiro scowled

"i will!" langa exclaimed with a determined look

"oi! didn't you hear me?!" kojiro snarled "don't call them! they're off limits! oi, listen to me!!" he groaned in aggravation

"joe, im gonna ask them to be my s/o!" langa said with a straight face as he stared at joe with a hopeful glint in his eyes

"NO!!"

"im doing it anyway!"

[calcifermovesthecastle]

S/o that asks for affection unconsciously when they wake up without even noticing (nsfw?), how would the Bucci gang + josuke + young joseph+ giorno react? :>

So I don’t age up characters for NSFW, so I’ll just do fluff for Narancia, Josuke, Fugo, Giorno and Trish, but I will add some Adult Characters with NSFW for your troubles. :) I’ll add a cut for the NSFW as well so anyone can read before the cut, but only 18+ after please!

Warnings: Language

Bucciarati (Fluff):

-He’s surprised when you hug him from behind when just standing around, or when you slip your hand in his just sitting, or stand behind him while he’s sitting and scratch his back (BLEASE DO THIS FOR HIM he will on god love you forever) 

-So when you two decide to move in, he’s also surprised to find that this carries over into sleeping. 

-He’ll wake up with you literally splayed out on top of him, And he blushes so hard. He’ll try to gently push you off of him back onto the bed, because surely you can’t be comfortable like that.

-Will immediately stop when you tighten your grip and stir, instead allowing his hands to rest on your back.

-He’s honestly not used to it but he will indulge you because god you’re so warm, and so soft and so beautiful in his arms. 

-You’ll notice when you’re awake that he’ll start to return your touches, leaning into your back scratches, squeezing your hand when you slip yours into his, Place his hands over your arms when you hug him from behind. 

-Will never say why, though. It’s his secret. 

Abbacchio (Fluff):

-You may not notice, but god, does he.

-He Panic. You’re half awake, and you just reach out and pull yourself closer to him, nuzzling your face into his chest, Your breath evening out. 

-Oh god what does he do with his hands are you even comfortable there’s no way you’re comfortable jesus what the hell

-He opts to push you away, but you tighten your hold, babbling something out in your sleep about being warm. 

-(He do be warm tho ngl) 

-It takes everything, and I mean, E v e r y t h i n g in him to give in and rest his arms around you, but once he does, and you snuggle even closer? God he’s in love. You’re literally the most precious thing to him. 

-When you’re awake tho he will absolutely push you off the bed without remorse. (Expect a top of the head kiss from him though he’s soft.) 

Mista (Fluff):

-He’s laying awake, tracing his finger along the wall, making damn sure the sex pistols don’t wake you. 

-In his distraction, you reach out, grasping his arm and hugging it. 

-(Arcana reference but Julian laugh) Oh ho ho!

-He takes note that you’re still asleep, and pulls you on top of him, securing his arms around you so that you don’t slip off. 

-Instead of tracing the wall, he will now be trailing his fingers up and down your arms and back, and through your hair. 

-His heart is melting you’re so god damn cute. He’ll tighten his grip, just gazing down at you with nothing but adoration in his eyes. 

-He will tease the everloving shit out of you when you wake up. Like he will not stfu about it. 

-He will also be a million times more physically affectionate with you during the day lol it’s sickening

-He is NOT stinky JFC

Fugo: 

-Whaaaaat are you doing?

-Oh, you’re asleep.

-WHAAATTT ARE YOU DOIIINNNGGGGG

-He’ll stiffen up, but oh no you’re sleeping he cant just...push you away... he’s not heartless....

-He is confused to say the least, and a lil bit uncomfy, but he trusts you. 

-Watches as your features relax as your face presses into the crook of his neck and your arm tightens around his middle. Oh fuck you’re cute

-you’ve won him over. 

-He’ll wrap an arm around your waist, (So you don’t fall dsjdsjdsj) and let you be close to him. He enjoys it too, if he’s being honest. You’re so cute. 

-When you wake up, he’s much kinder and softer towards you. He’ll make any excuse to gently bump knees while you’re sitting or to brush his hand against yours while reaching for something. 

-Only because you asked for it tho

Narancia:

-Nani in tarnation is goin on?

-He’s completely taken by surprise. You’re asleep? And you want him? To hold you? ???? ?????? *Windows start up sounds* 

-He literally doesn’t know what to do He’s so soft and so confused with his negative brain cells (I do hate him but I will admit he does have a big heart he is a sweetie) 

-He will, a little too eagerly, hug you back. His tenacity may or may not wake you up. (It does. Sorry.) 

-You wake up to a surprise hug though so win win?

-The more you subconsciously ask, the more he gives, until you two are literally glued together. (Social distancing whomst? We don’t know her.) 

-Expect sloppy kisses everywhere. On the other hand, funnily enough, you will have to initiate the hugging. He’s so scared. What if he hugs you too tight? What if he wakes you up again? What if he suffocates you? What if you don’t like his hugs

-Hug him jfc he needs reassurance that you want to be held. 

-Sleepy morning hugs where you two are just breathing in sync and there’s not a care in the world are his favorite

Giorno-

-He is a light sleeper. I know I’ve said this before, but he is a very, very, very light sleeper. 

-So when you reach out and grasp at any piece of him you can reach, trying to close the gap between you (It’s a cold winter morning, come on) 

-He’ll startle awake and look over at you to check and see if you’re okay. 

-Oh, you are okay. Oh, you just want held? Alright. He’s up for that. Oh. You’re asleep? He’ll have to be especially careful to not wake you. 

-He will pull you close and rub circles into your back, pressing his cheek against the top of your head. He might even fall back asleep. If you stir, it’s not for long. His warmth and soothing movements lull you back to sleep in the safety of his arms. 

-When you’re awake, he’ll definitely be more affectionate, pressing tiny flowers into your hands, brushing your hair back, k i s s i n g y o u r k n u c k l e s (Im so fucking soft) 

-But seriously imagine Giorno getting down on one knee, taking your hand, and brushing his lips against your knuckles while looking up at you with literally nothing but love and affection in his eyes im going to cry

-Anything he does will have you a blushing mess

Trish:

-Who tf is waking her up? 

-oh, it’s you

-Oh, you’re hugging her

-OH, You’re still asleep.

-O H, you’re fucking cute!

-She’ll study you for a minute, before reaching up to lightly cup your cheek in her hand, careful not to wake you up. Her fingers will flutter over your face, tracing your features. She absolutely adores how precious you look snuggled up against her. 

-When you wake up, expect to have your hand held all day. Trish is the queen of hand holding. She will also take your face in her hands and kiss the corners of your lips, and rest her head on your shoulder when you two are sitting next to each other.  

-She’ll have this smug look on her face the whole time too dsjdsjdsjdsjds 

-Will absolutely do the disgusting feeding each other thing. “Babe, try this!” *Proceeds to hold forkful of food in front of your mouth. “Oh, that looks good, can I have some?” *Lets you do the same* 

-It’s revolting and I love it. 

Joseph (Fluff):

-He’s already awake. He’s got to get up early and train (Viva reverie reference: “With these tall hat guys for a looooong time!”)  But oops, you just so happened to burrow against him, and your arm seems to have found its way across his stomach. What a predicament, you’re still asleep! He can’t wake you!

-He decides that he just doesn’t have the heart to move you, and wraps his arms around you to pull you even closer. What if you get cold? He’s warm, you’ll be warm next to him!

-He will hold you against him until you wake up, no matter how late it makes him. Punishments be damned. You’re way too cute and this opportunity is way too good to pass up. 

-In all honesty though he’s elated that you want him to hold you. This carries over into you being awake. He’ll be hanging off of you. Hell, He’ll carry you around if you give the okay. He will absolutely kneel so he can carry you around on his shoulders. 

-He’s very handsy, so rip to your personal space. You asked for it, after all. You wanna sit in that chair over there? Aww, that’s too bad. He’s your chair now. 

-Are you complaining tho? He’s got some thicc thighs, you’ll be pretty comfy. 

-Psst his hands are gonna be like twice your size compare hand sizes he will love it

Josuke:

-He’s already cuddly bb

-But if on the rarest of rare occasions he either 1.) wakes up before you or 2.) Isnt already holding you, and you press closer to him in your sleep, just maybe ball his shirt up in your fists as you clutch at him, yearning for the affection you’re too scared to ask for when you’re awake

-Oh god he cry

-He cry so hard

-He is the (Parker James’ Steven Voice) CEO of bear hugs. Especially if someone as adorable as you is cuddling up against him.

-He will pull you up against him and bury his face in your hair, maybe even falling back asleep himself. (good luck getting out of his embrace when he’s asleep lol There’s no chance.) 

-it is always a nice surprise to wake up cocooned in his arms, his entire body wrapped around you. 

-When you’re both awake, He’ll do lots of little things for you. Absentmindedly rub your back and shoulders, sling an arm around your shoulders, link pinkies, hold hands, forehead kisses

-He will lift you up and spin you around and kiss you but shh don’t tell anyone

-He is

-so GOD damn soft I love him 

NSFW BELOW THE CUT

18+ ONLY

BUCCIARATI:

-He’s in the midst of registering being awake, getting prepared for the day, when he notices that you’re uh

-he can’t help his erection when he sees you bury your face in his neck and grind your hips against him. You’re still asleep, what could you possibly be dreaming about? 

-Oh god if he hears you whimper his name it’s all over for you. 

-Shakes your shoulder, peering into your sleep-gripped eyes and smiles nervously. 

-”Tesoro, would you mind if I made love to you before I left for work?” 

-Your lips on his are answer enough. He’ll thrust into you at a slow, sensual speed, showering you in praises, leaving soft kisses all over your body. Never marking, but always making sure the feeling of his mouth lingers on your skin. 

-He will speak only in italian during this time, so unless you know italian, don’t count on understanding anything he says. (You’ll have a pretty good Idea of what he means tho 👀)

-He will absolutely make sure you won’t be getting out of bed for the rest of the day. He definitely has a way of making your body melt under his touch. He’s never rough. He’s so, so gentle with you, and you’d be surprised how quickly he can have you cumming because of it. 

-If you ask nicely, he’ll stay in bed with you for a little longer afterwards, pressing kisses into your hair and telling you how much he cherishes you

-”You don’t have to be afraid, dolcezza. My arms are always open for you. You’ll find in them nothing but home.” 

ABBACCHIO: 

-Did you just grab his tiddies?

-He’s in the middle of telling you off when he sees that you’re asleep, mumbling about how you want him to take you, grinding against him. 

-Something feral awakens in him at the sight of you, unknowingly begging for him, and he grabs your wrists, flipping you fast, waking you, and leaning over you, his breath hot against your ear. 

-”Dolcezza, Is it okay if I fuck you?” 

-The answer is yesssssssss

-Oh bby he is R o u g h. He’ll use his stand to hold your arms above your head and push your legs up so far that your thighs will be pressed against your chest, and he will pound into you with a speed and force that’s almost inhuman

-He will kiss you hard, and long, so that when he pulls away, you’re gasping for air, your lips bruised, your eyes rolled into the back of your head. 

-Any qualms he has about being this close to you are out the door. You’ll have deep handprints in your legs from where he was holding them, and the darker the bruise he leaves with his mouth, the happier he is. He doesn’t care where he leaves them, either. Expect some on your chin, your neck, your chest, anywhere he can reach, honestly. But if your lips are bruised, that’s what satisfies him the most. 

-You’ll definitely cum more than once, and once he cums, it’s hard, and he’ll pull you flush against him, breathing heavily, burying his face in your shoulder. Tell him it’s okay, because once he’s come down from his high, his fear that he hurt you is overwhelming. He loves you, after all. Reassure him. Hold him close, and don’t let go. 

MISTA: 

-(Once again Julian laugh) Oh ho ho! 

-He’s gonna watch for a minute, but wake you up if the pressure becomes too much for him. He’ll give you a moment to wake up, and then ask you to fuck. 

-(Yes yes yes) 

-He’s like a mix of Abbacchio and Bucciarati. Rough and kinky, but will literally shower you in praise and affection. 

-He likes tugging your hair while taking you from behind (If you have hair. If not, his hands will grip your waist, or reach around to rub your clit/stroke your cock depending. 

-He will kiss down your back while leaning over you, making sure to leave little marks that’ll last, but not long 

-Definitely makes you cum before he does, but if he can, really enjoys cumming together. To him, it adds to the intimacy of the moment. 

-”Oh, Bombolone, do you need me so much that You want me even in your dreams? I’ll wake you each time, I need you more than you know. You are so perfect. You are so wonderful, and adorable, and I love you so much.” 

-He will literally not shut the fuck up during sex but it’s okay because it’s all sweet and loving. 

JOSEPH: 

-Oh jesus christ stroke his ego why dontcha

-if you’ve discussed it beforehand, and you’re into Somnophilia, he’ll fuck you right there. But if not, He’ll take the time to wake you, his ears burning red. 

-”Oi, babe, You were holding onto me kinda tight and grinding your hips against my leg. If you want me that bad, say something.”  

-He will destroy you. Something about seeing you want him when you’re not even aware of what you’re doing? OOF. 

-He also has a bad case of not shutting the fuck up during sex. 

-The best remedy to this is to just pull him down into a kiss while he’s snapping his hips against yours. Hold it for as long as possible. It’ll make his heart happy if you’re bold enough to initiate a kiss as well.��

-He cums before you but will help you cum as well, whether it be eating you out/blowjob or fingering you/handjob. (If you’re AMAB then he’ll let you return the favor tbh) 

-Will shamelessly ask you for a blowjob. If you indulge him, he’s on cloud nine, His hands weaved into your hair, watching your every move as your mouth closes around his cock and your tongue swirls around him. It takes all of his self control not to throat fuck you. 

-Once you’ve reached your limit, he’ll help you into the shower and massage wherever’s sore, washing you off with a gentleness that’s a stark contrast to his movements prior. 

BONUS GYRO

-When did you end up in his sleeping bag? 

-He’s awake before you or Johnny, and he notices you’ve burrowed yourself close to him. You’re also

-Nyo-ho. Oh are you also. 

-He’ll shake your shoulder, and once you’re awake, he’ll flash his grill and lean in, whispering in your ear

-”D’you wanna fuck me that bad that you’re doing it in your sleep, doll?” 

-Who cares if johnny’s sleeping right over there, with your consent, he’s inside of you faster than anything. He’ll give you a moment to adjust to him, and then start off slow, massaging your hips and thighs, whispering how amazing you are. 

-He goes slow, but makes sure he’s down to his full length with every thrust, pressing his lips into the corners of your mouth, then crashing them directly against your lips, not letting you come up for air until your legs are trembling around him. 

-He won’t change things up until he hears a “Please” 

-That’s his favorite word. If you groan out a “Please, Gyro,” And your voice cracks, oh, are you in for a t r e a t. 

-He’ll make you see stars, but shh, don’t get too loud, doll. Johnny’s asleep. If you’re being too loud, he’ll cover your mouth with his hand. 

-Please hold onto him. Wrap your arms and legs around him while he fucks you. He loves it so much. 

-Once you’ve cum, he tumbles not long after, blurting out something in italian that you can only hope to understand if you don’t speak it. (Hint: It’s praises for you and your body.) 

-Once he’s done, he falls back down next to you, pulling you close and pressing his lips to your forehead, deciding that It can be a later start than usual today. Besides, you look so cute curled up against him like that, doll. 

[pvrpleblccd]

Promise.

pairing : shuntaro chishiya x f reader

tw : angst, unresolved grief, death, mentions of death, blood, violence (beating up someone), chishiya being violent

a/n : this is my first post- cndovn- but i am currently having a massive crush on this man right here <3 ALSO CHISHIYA GIVES ME MASSIVE KENMA VIBES (im sorry for the typos, i wrote this at 4 am-)

-

There he was again, sitting at the edge of the rooftop of the Beach, hoods on and hands in his white Nike zip up sweater, well, it was given to him. He looked down to see all of the horny animals dancing and living their life as if it was their last day. Chishiya sighed, ‘Everyone looks like their all about to die, as always.’

It was a beautiful day in this cruel country. But it’s just like any other day, people will die tonight, either because their visa will expire or die during a game. Dying in a game, probably the worst death here. Chishiya sighed again and took a deep breath, trying to erase all negativity going through his head. Though, there’s one thing that he can’t get out of his head.

“Hey, Chishiya.”

Chihsiya whipped his head to where he heard the voice. He was about to call her name, but he only saw Kuina at the door of the rooftop entrance, looking at Chishiya with a confused look. ‘Ah... I’m still hearing her voice, I must be crazy.’

“An told me you guys had a meeting, I’m just here to rely the message to you.”

The blonde male nodded and stood up, making his way to where Kuina was. No words were exchanged between the both of them, though Kuina noticed the slight mood change the male had every now and then. There are times where he’s cocky, would always slide comment when he had the chance, had his guard up, and times where he just became more reserved than ever and was cold and gloomy.

Kuina noticed, but never dared prying on it, not wanting to get on the intelligent man bad side.

Chishiya on the other side, he zipped up the white hoodie he loved very much. He entered the meeting room and sat at his place, like always, though he kept a pokerface while hugging the hoodie he was wearing. He felt several pair of eyes on him, not on him, but the zip up he was wearing. No one dared to say anything, though Niragi wasn’t having it.

“Chishiya. Were you really obligated to wear that zip up when we’re in a meeting?!”

Niragi shouted from his place, gripping hard the rifle he had in his hand. No one budge or said anything, even Hatter looked at Chishiya, both with envy and anger in his eyes.

“It was given to me. Why whouldn’t I wear it? If you’re thinking that we should share it, you, out of everyone in this room, that I don’t share what I own. And plus, if we shared it, you’d only get blood on it and dirty it, y/n managed to keep it white and as clean as possible. I won’t let your stupidity ruin it.”

“You wouldn’t know what y/n would have wanted!” Niragi stood up and pointed his rifle at the blonde male.

“I knew y/n longer than you.”

“We were still close!”

“To someone like you? I don’t think so, you’re a complete psycho, Niragi.”

“Give it a break! We’re all mourning Chishiya, espicially An! So what the hell do you mean, y/n-”

“Y/n is dead.” Last Boss said while looking at the arguing males.

The room was even more quiet than it ever was, not only with the statement, but for the bald tattooed male to speak up and empathized the dead made them slightly uncomfortable. With no one saying a thing for a minute or two, Mira stood up and talked about the card they were able to collect and that they haven’t gotten news ones for a while. An talked about the medical supplies and that she was running out from it, Hatter asked Aguni and his Militants to accompany An for a short run to grab all supplies they can gather.

She was the first one to leave, the meeting room which was understandable. When no one said anything, Hatter talked about adding a new rule. Rule number three, death to traitors.

Soon after, the meeting was done.

The blonde male made his way to his room, opening the door he saw a familiar figure sitting on his bed, when he blinked the figure was gone. Chishiya closed his room door and laid on his bed, looking at the ceiling. He never felt so confused and empty in his entire life. He never wanted to deal with anyone’s emotions or feelings, let alone his. But upon on thinking and thinking, he came to a conclusion he now only realized.

How much he loved y/n.

“Damn it. This hurts... This sucks.”

Too tired and exhausted to think, Chishiya closed his eyes and embraced the darkness that surrounded him.

“Chishiya?” A voice called out.

The blonde male turned his head, seeing a petite figure looking at him as if he was a ghost. He looked at her from head to toe and his eyes grew wide, he instantly got up and hugged the petite figure.

“Y/n?” He said in a weak voice.

The petite figure sighed in relief and hugged the male back, while letting out a small sob. They were currently in an abandonned mall, gathering food and necessities to get through the night. Y/n came back with a ton of canned food and water, while Chishiya came back with the others things they needed, such as flashlights and batteries and other things.

The both of them were catching up upon missed times and Chishiya kept eyeing on how she was dressed, grey sweatpants with a nike zip up and what looked like a swimsuit top, and the pink locker bracelet around y/n wrist. The numbers 009 was on the bracelet and the girl knew he was looking at it.

“What’s the most recent game you completed?” The petite girl asked.

“Six of diamonds, how about you?” Chishiya said, eating the canned peach. He didn’t noticed the slight spark in y/n’s eyes, but she smiled.

“Nine of hearts.” Y/n said and took a bite of her food.

A comfortable and peaceful silence was set between the two until the girl broke it.

“I want to take you somewhere.”

~

“Hatter, I want him to be part of the executives.”

Y/n said right after they all welcomed her back. All of them looked at her with confused and looked at Chishiya then back at y/n. The girl only smiled and put all of cards she collected on the table. Chishiya couldn’t believe the amount of cards she had in her possession, there was 14 cards in total.

“Chishiya cleared a diamonds game and is the lone survivor, I highly believe that his skills can be very useful to us. Also, I have known him before entering the Borderland. He is like a precious gem, full of hidden talents!”

She said while putting her hands in her grey sweatpants.

The blonde male was taken aback by the sudden praise, but dind’t show it. The others turned their attention to Chishiya, hearing the praise from y/n made them have a base opinion on Chishiya, he was smart and must not be harmed. Hatter started to explain the two rules to Chishiya and handed him a blue locker bracelet with the number 011 on it.

“Enjoy the Beach!”

~

After Chishiya settled in the Beach for a couple of weeks, he and y/n grew closer than they ever were before. The two of them became inseparable.

During one night, Chishiya and y/n were hanging out in the lobby, they were part of the first teams that finished early. Chishiya lost his other hoodie, blood was splattered on it, due to a player clung onto him begging him to help him and his collar went off.

In short words, he was currently shirtless. Y/n trying her best not to look, couldn’t help, but take a peek, thought the blonde male caught her.

“Like what you see?”

He said with a grin plastered on his face. Out of embarrassment, she took off her white Nike zip up and handed it to Chishiya, who watched her with an amused expression.

“H-here...! It’s yours now..!” She said and sprinted to elsewhere.

Chishiya sat there smiling at himself and decied to put the zip up on. He got up from his place and went off to find y/n. A part of him starting to worry, since it’s been an hour and he hasn’t found the petite girl yet. He passed the lobby at least three or four times, that’s when he started asking around.

With no one knowing where the girl was, he even asked Niragi, he too was worried so they both went on their sides to find her. Chishiya went outside and started to walk around the perimeter until he heard an oh so familiar voice coming form the sketchy alleyway.

“Were you hiding the cards from Hatter?”

“So what if I was?! I had to watch my friends die in front of me to be able to get this card! I’m not giving it to some cult leader or whatever he is!”

Chishiya rushed to the voices and saw one of the new militants holding three cards in his left hands and a gun in this right. Y/n tried to reason with the boy, but it only seemed to boil his blood even more, to the point he raised his gun. Chishiya ran to y/n side and hid her behind him, y/n on the other side was surprised.

“Put the gun down... You’re pointing it at the most important person apart from Hatter.” Chishiya tried calm the boy down, but didn’t work.

“Y/n... You remember Kirika? She was close to you right? Did you know that she gave her life up so that I can survive the game? Her last words were, ‘Tell y/n, thank you... I love you Aki-kun.’ She gave her life for me because she loved me!”

Aki broke down crying, falling on his knees and letting out pained screams. Y/n came forward tears falling down her cheek and approached Aki and gave him a hug. She careful put the gun down and caressed the top of Aki’s head.

“Kirika was a wonderful person, Aki, she was-“

Y/n sentence was cut abruptly and Chishiya took a step wondering why y/n suddenly stopped talking, he took another stop forward, his eyes widening seeing Aki’s hands was covered in blood and held a knife. He dropped the knife and moved his hand to grab the gun next to him.

“You’re all Hatter’s soldier. We have to end this, I have to end it.”

Aki grabbed the gun and slowly got up, hair covering his eyes. While Chishiya looked at how y/n’s body fell to the side and seeing a dark substance staining her grey sweatpants. A small pool of her own blood was starting to form underneath her.

Chishiya looked at Aki who was still mumbling things, but he saw red. The blonde grabbed the closest thing to him, which was a metal pipe, and ran towards Aki, hitting him with it, unable to stop himself.

Chishiya’s blood was boiling, he never felt so angered in his entire life. He kept on swining the pipe, hitting a part of Aki’s body every time. His vision was red, he couldn’t even hear the screams of his victim. What brought him back was Aguni taking off the metal pipe off of his hands. Chishiya’s face was unrecognizable, it was full of hatred, sadness, anger and disgust. Aguni never saw such expression on the male’s face before, he always looked so calm and preserved.

Something caught Chishiya off guard when he looked at Aguni. His eyes were red, as if he was holding himself back not to cry, that’s when he remembered y/n. He turned around to see An trying to stop the bleeding from y/n’s wound, but the blood was coming out and went through all of the amount of cloth that was put on it.

The blonde male rushed towards y/n’s side caressed her face while shaking his head. Tears fell on the girl’s cheek while Chishiya was telling y/n to stay with him. He soon looked at An and she was trying everything she could, all of the sudden, a small and tired voice caught his attention.

“S...shuntaro...? Ri-chan..?”

The blonde male whipped his head to look at y/n. She was smiling. Why was she smiling? She was dying, but she was still smiling. Chishiya tried to understand her, but couldn’t.

“S-spending my... last moments.. with the ones I love.. Shun... taro... I’m sorry... but pro..mise me... you’ll live, okay?”

“W..why are you saying sorry.. No. We both survive okay? Look... An... An will take care of you okay?”

Y/n turned weakly looked over the forsenic, who was doing her best to keep the petite girl alive. They made an eye contact, y/n let out a pained sigh while An shook her head. Y/n was trying to stay strong until the very end.

“Ri..chan... Thank you for everything... Take care... Big sis...”

At this point, An was crying too and shouted for other people to come help them. Y/n placed her bloodied hand on Chishiya’s cheek, wiping his tears away, he held her hand as she caressed him. She was so warm, he never knew she was this warm before. He didn’t wanted her to leave.

Just not yet.

“No.. No, you can’t leave.. Hang on okay y/n..? Help is... help is on the way.”

Y/n shook her head and let all of her tears fall, managing to give Chishiya one final smile.

“Shuntaro... I love you.”

At her words, y/n’s eyes closed and her hand went limp, landing on her body. When the other arrived, all of the executives looked at the scene before them. They were too late. An was crying, still holding on her little sister dead body, telling her to wake up and not to leave her. Chishiya sat there unable to move or say anything.

A pang of guilt hit two executives in particular and they slightly looked at each other and sighed, tears slowly coming in their vision. Aguni was behind them and his fist turned white, knowing y/n was the most important person in the Beach. She was the only one who kept Hatter in the sane side.

Niragi pushed the people aside and dropped his rifle, analyzing the dead girl’s feature. Y/n died with a smile on her face.

“She looks so peaceful.”

Chishiya woke up at the sound of the bell, indicating to gather in the lobby and group up, since the games were about to start. He felt something wet on his side and he looked at his pillow, it was wet. He touched his face and he shook his head, laying on his bed once again.

He cried. He was crying.

He looked at the ceiling and smiled sadly, clutching on his chest at the amount of pain he felt. The memory of her smiling to him was engraved in his mind and he wasn’t going to let it go.

“I never had the chance to tell you that I loved you too... I’m sorry.. I only now realized it..”

He stood up, wiping the tears off of his face, putting his shoes on and went to the lobby. He put his hood on and tucked his hands in the pockets, he analyzed everyone and he nodded to himself.

‘I will keep my promise.’

[obeiii-mee]

Could I request the brothers (and maybe Diavolo, if you're comfortable) reacting to a knightly/chivalrous m/c, please?

———————————————————

I haven’t written Diavolo in a hot minute, I’m glad he’s being requested again. I’m guessing you mean an MC with the attributes of a knight? The same sort of mannerisms and traits and not an actual knight! MC? Lemme know if I did this ask wrong because I was low key confused lmao.

———————————————————

The Brothers + Diavolo with a knightly/chivalrous MC:

Lucifer:

-He really didn’t like you upon first meeting

-He hated how he couldn’t intimidate you into not being a nuisance the way he could with most of his brothers

-But, to be honest, you had gained his respect rather early on

-I think, even though it may have annoyed him to no end, Lucifer was very fond of your bravery a lot of the times

-The way you would stand up for Mammon or that time you protected Beel and Luke from his outburst

-Courage is not a trait one would usually associate with humans, especially when more superior beings like demons are involved

-Your humility was also a characteristic of yours that he, surprisingly, was really fond of

-And your overall mercifulness was something to be congratulated as well

-I mean, him and his brothers put you through so much shit and for you to forgive and move on without an angry word at any of them kinda speaks on its own

-I think he understands, to an extent, the reason you’re so loyal to the people you care about too

-He has a certain devotion for Lord Diavolo and his brothers, more than he lets on

-To him, having someone like you around is something to be appreciated

-Because you are similar but also completely different and nothing like he deemed you to be at the beginning

-yo i think you remind him of himself back when he was angel tbh

-He’s sort of tired of saving your ass tho because you are very just, so you feel the need to help people all the time which leads to you getting involved in fights

-Bring him his 20th cup of coffee for the day please, it’s hard being a single father of 8 children (yes I’ve added Lord Diavolo he counts as one of the kids)

-He’s the definition of this incorrect quote I stumbled across a while back

- MC: “FIGHT ME RIGHT NOW!”

-Lucifer, from behind them “ Do not.”

Mammon:

-Ok so this random human comes to DevilDom and has the audacity to slap his hand away while he’s trying to steal from Diavolo’s castle????????

-“MC ya’re forgetting I’m a demon, my moral scale is wayyy different than yours-“

-“Put it back.”

-“......ok.”

-You’re coming at him with rightfulness and honor and your presence is gonna hit him like a truck

-Cuz he ain’t stealing anything when you’re around (lucifer uses this to his advantage ofc.)

-That was basically the only thing he disliked about you

-Other than that, after your first week in DevilDom, he thinks you’re a goddamn S A I N T

-Everytime you stand up for him when his brothers are being assholes-pls he melts into a puddle of goo from your perfection

-OOFFS AND ALL THOSE TIMES YOU GAVE HIM GIFTS BECAUSE GENEROSITY BBY

-Good thing he was wearing sunglasses, because holy fuck was he weeping under those Gucci shades

-He’s gonna give ya props for having the courage to stand up to him and his brothers

-Lucifer especially because big bro scary

-Think about it like this: literally every single one of them could have you seasoned and roasted for lunch, love

-And yet you still have the bravery to look them in the eye and tell them: “Ya’ll are dysfunctional as fuck and need family therapy.”

-Again, he doesn’t understand your morale, he’s the Avatar of Greed, if he sees something he likes or seems worthy of his presence, he takes it

-But with that look you’re giving him, he honestly feels so guilty he can’t help but put it back

-He also appreciates your patience with him when it comes to anything that involves him talking about his emotions and thought process

-Because at this point he is widely known as scum so-

-Ahhhh, in the end, he thinks you’re pretty badass for a human and would low key want to see you in an armour of sorts agajwhisebhwjwwhehgdhdh

-And he really likes it when you make the effort to open doors for him too but he’ll never have the nerve to admit it

Levi:

-Believe it or not, he warms up to you in less than a day...?

-It’s probably because he’s a navy commander and he’s used to having soldiers around and you sort of remind him of that

-Out of everyone, he reacts the least when he sees how you carry yourself because to him it’s second nature

-Even if he does tend to slouch most of the time

-Almost dropped to his knees and started worshiping you when you yelled at Mammon to give Levi his money back on your first day

-And then a friendship started to blossom (im not friendzoning y’all, relax)

-Levi has a tendency to just walk into your room with his laptop, point at the screen which is paused in the middle of an anime and go “Look, the protagonist is a knight. You’re also...really knightly. I like the protagonist. I, uh I like you too, I guess.”

-He loves how honest you are because he knows that no matter what you wouldn’t lie to him

-“MC, do you think I’m a yucky otaku?”

-“No.”

-“But-“

-“No.”

-“Oh ok.”

-But on the inside he’s like 🥰🥰💞💞💞💞

-I just think that a knightly MC would connect on an emotional level with Levi for a lot of reasons, idk

-He’s gonna be a sputtering mess when he realises how much effort you put into this relationship (platonic or romantic) and how loyal you are to it

-Like how you actually bother learning all of his stupid passwords because you are just as serious about them as he is

-He just crashed, give him a moment to reboot please

Satan:

-He takes a while to warm up to you because for some reason your overall demeanour reminded him of Lucifer lol

-He thought you might be just as stuck up as him

-It didn’t take him longer than a week or so to come to the sudden realisation that you are way more pleasant than his brother

-Like his daddy, you manage to earn his respect pretty quickly after that

-He just thought the way you handled everything that was thrown at you in DevilDom was very sophisticated but firm nonetheless, if that makes sense?

-Like, you weren’t itching to escalate fights or anything but your tone of voice could easily end a whole conversation if need be

-You were still a human of course, it would be real easy for some low rank demon to kidnap you or something

-But for some reason, your confidence seemed to intimidate a few of the weaker ones into leaving you alone

-Obviously, that didn’t mean you were completely safe or anything

-There were still others that could effortlessly overpower you

-Even so, Satan found it sort of reassuring that unlike some humans, you weren’t one to back down without a confrontation

-Don’t get me started on all those times you rebelled against Lucifer, because that’s what truly got him to get to know you better

-He found you pretty interesting and then that interest sort of evolved into actual fondness

-Another thing that caught his eye was that even though you have very strong feelings about justice and fairness, you are completely level headed most of the time

-And patience, while it’s something he can manage, is the one that he has been trying to control for centuries

-He learned a lot from you about behaviour, whether you intentionally taught it to him or not

-And if there is one thing Satan thinks highly of; it would be knowledge

-Therefore, from that point onward, your existence was so much more precious to him than your soul could ever be

Asmo:

-What can I say about our sweet Asmo?

-You could have the personality of a trashcan and he’d still love you

-You were so polite and honourable from the beginning to the point you managed to get the attention of the Avata of Lust himself????

-He thought you were pretty hot basically

-hoWEVER

-Your righteousness always sort of nagged him because he low-key believed Diavolo snuck in another angel into the program, I-

-And for some reason, your loyalty to everyone in general ticked him off immensely at the beginning

-Mainly because he recognised that’s one of the traits he lacks entirely and he came to the conclusion that he needs to revaluate himself on that one

-He is so desperate for your attention, he will tattle on his brothers just to get you to yell at them and then comfort him

-“MCCCCC, MAMMON STOLE MY NEWEST MAKE UP KIT AND IS ABOUT TO SELL IT ON AKUZON!”

-he is so petty istg

-Your nobility still catches him off guard every now and then

-Because you’ve been living with demons for so long and yet you’re still, theoretically speaking, pure?? get your head out of the gutter people

-He probably applauds you on the fact that you can even scare Lucifer on some occasions because imagine having a scarier death glare than the eldest prince of hell

-Asmo will personally buy you clothes that he thinks suit your “aesthetic” (wtf Asmo)

-Might’ve bought you a sword and then got shouted at by Lucifer because oops turns out it was cursed

-Again, supportive mom vibes

-“MC, do you know how stunning you look strutting around with that confidence of yours? Don’t get me started on your posTURE!”

-You pulled a chair for him once and he practically swooned lmao

Beel:

-He figures you’re really nice from the start

-Mostly because you kept running errands and opening doors for him even though he let it slip that he might lose control and eat you

-Like most brothers, he finds you comforting in a way

-Beel appreciates your honesty to him too because he can count on you to tell him when he’s doing something wrong

-And he sort of needs the validation that even though he blames himself for a lot of things that took place in the past, his brothers and you are more than ready to forgive him (even if they didn’t blame him to begin with)

-Rather than respect, Beel puts a lot of trust into you, which I would believe to be more intimate

-If it’s just the two of you hanging out, he has an easier time opening up about Lilith because he knows you would never judge him and respect his feelings enough to let him get it out of his system

-You always share your food with him and give him a bigger portion and he goes so soft-

-Like who allowed you to be this generous?

-Tbh, he thinks it’s sort of refreshing having someone like you around

-Beel has been surrounded by demons for millenniums now and he’s gotten used to their...uh ‘evilness’

-Ever since you got dropped off in DevilDom, you really stood out with your nobility and morals

-It was like a breath of fresh air in a way

-He may or may not believe you’re a good influence on his siblings-if you can even influence demons of all things

-I’m not saying he invites you to work out with him and give him honest criticism, but he definitely invites you to work out with him and give him honest criticism

Belphie:

-“Out of all the humans they could’ve chosen, they picked the most annoying one, oH MY FUCKING GO-I MEAN DAD-“

-You go up to the attic that one night after tricking Lucifer into vibing to some classical TSL tunes

-He spotted you and was immediately irritated

-Like, he KNEW you were going to be a pain in the ass just by judging your posture and how you carried yourself (very knightly)

-At the start, he’s even hesitant to lie to you because he had a suspicion you wouldn’t buy his bs

-(Spoiler alert: you didn’t but you went with it either way)

-It takes a while for you to forgive him when he literally fucking kills you because that was rude af but you got over it in time

-AFTER of the whole ‘Sorry-for-choking-you-can-we-be-friends-now’ incident, you still get on his nerves a lot but at this point, he believes that’s his punishment for being a murderous dickhead

-You don’t really piss him off tho, you just confuse him a lot

-Why are you so polite? You keep pulling chairs and opening doors for him??? Why are you treating him like royalty?? Stop it, he doesn’t want to be like Lord Diavolo (he def likes it when you do that)

-Pls stop dragging the poor man to breakfast, he just wants to sleep in-

-He doesn’t understand how you’re always one time for everything

-My dude tries to wake up 20 minutes early to get somewhere in time and he is still 2 hours late

-sTOP TRYING TO FORCE YOUR IDEALS ONTO HIM, HE’S A LITTLE SHIT WHO ENJOYS WATCHING PEOPLE SUFFER

-All the same, you’re a very forgiving person so he’s just grateful you don’t hate him or anything

-And in the end, it doesn’t really matter how much your chivalry and righteousness and all of that pisses him off every now and then

-Because he can’t deny the fact that you brought him and his brothers the peace they needed

-And he so loves it when you and Lucifer go head to head mhmm

Diavolo:

-This big tittied man right here takes a liking to you immediately

-A couple of days in DevilDom and he’s already inviting you for tea at his castle

-You managed to befriend the prince of hell faster than the demons you live with, huh

-He’s lonely ok? He loves having people over and having cozy chitchats

-Not to mention he thinks you’re such pleasant company!

-Most demons would be afraid to even say anything in his presence but you always speak your mind while continuing to be respectful and he’s so happy, you don’t understand-

-Only demons in close relations to Diavolo like Babrbatos and Lucifer actually know how much it takes for someone to anger him

-He doesn’t take offence to much lol

-And he’s really content that you acknowledged that

-He sometimes visits you in his spare time just to talk and hang out since Lucifer is a big meanie who doesn’t want to indulge him and Barbatos is busy making him dinner >:(

-SPEAKING OF- if you and Barbatos don’t bond then i don’t know what to tell you

-I mean, you would both have so many things in common (strong sense of loyalty, honesty, just in a way etc.)

-You’re his favourite guest to have over at the palace, sorry Luci you’ve been replaced

-He genuinely finds you interesting as well so please tell him stories from the human realm!! He’s dying to learn more!

-Diavolo notices you demeanour sort of gives off warrior vibes so-

-He really considered making you into a knight bc it’s Diavolo-what he says; goes

-“I know they’re human but they’ll be fine. Look how tough they are! They managed to survive a year with you and your brothers didn’t they?”

-“My Lord, that doesn’t amount to anything, please don’t get our human killed-“

[petite-ely]

Afraid // JJ Maybank

Seven- Mommy Issues

Pairing: JJ Maybank x fem routledge! reader

Warnings: mommy issues, mother abandonment, anger, maybe some mistakes, tell me if I missed anything

Description: y/n has always wanted answers about her mother, but the truth seems more harsh than what she had in mind.

A/n : hello, hello friends. Sorry for not updating sooner. I had absolutely no inspiration, lol. Anyways, hope you enjoyyyy! :) (also I know the gif is terrible quality but I really wanted to put this clip and I couldn’t find any cleaner option to make a gif)

Previously

Afraid Masterlist

Song recommendation

Gif made by me!

As a child, y/n never realized how her family was different than the others. A lot of kids on the cut had single parents, it wasn’t that big of a deal. Her mom had left when she was only three, to go pursue her dream job in Colorado. It wasn’t a bad thing in the girl’s eyes. It didn’t feel like she was missing out on anything.

As she blossomed into adolescence, y/n finally understood how unconventional her family was. She heard the other girls at her school talk about their mothers. About the cakes they made or the precious moments they spent together. Mother-daughter bonding moments. She had to admit it she felt jealous. Or maybe was it envious?

She had lived all her life without a mother to kiss her scraped knees or braid her hair before going to sleep. And she would have given anything to experience it, even for one single night.

It wasn’t that she didn’t love her brother or her father, far from it, she adored them. They were both so precious to her. Still, she felt as if something was missing from her. Or more like someone.

She didn’t remember her mother, she was so young at the time, but she cherished the stories her father had told her. She fed her imagination on these stories. Making up fake memories where her mother was still there. In her heart it was all real. Reality was bitter compared to the sweet comfort of her imagination.

By the time she was 12, she’d heard the famous story enough to know it by heart, each word of the letter engraved into her head. She begged her father again and again. She wanted more stories, even the smallest anecdotes, she wanted to hear them all. Anything to improve the sketch, constantly redrawn, of the woman she didn’t remember. The woman she couldn’t really call a mother.

She knew the story by heart and yet it felt incomplete. She’d heard enough fairytales and read enough books to know when a story was complete. This one wasn’t.

And she was right.

A week after the twins’s 13th birthday, their dad gathered them around the kitchen table. He wanted to talk. It was very important. Y/n had to admit, this was quite strange, as her father was never the one to bring up important issues. In front of him was placed an envelope, yellowed with the years.

The girl knew this envelope all too well. Every scratch, every little bump, she could almost feel them on the tip of her fingers. It was her mother’s letter. This time, when he pulled out the folded pages, a third paper came out. The missing part.

Big John didn’t say anything, only slid the pearl white sheet to the twins. And though no words came out of his mouth, a million could be seen in his gaze. He wore an unfamiliar expression on his face. It was mix of sadness, fear and regrets. It was the expression of a man who only wanted to protect his children from being hurt.

The missing paper read as so:

“This is my dream, John.

And I know you might think there’s a way for us to fix this, but there isn’t. This time you can’t fix it.

When I got pregnant with the kids, I was so scared. And when I told you, I saw this glimmer in your eyes. This flame suddenly being lit inside of you. You were so excited to have your first child and it was twins! You seemed so happy. It was beautiful.

Then I thought that maybe we could do this, maybe I could be a mother. I had you, so everything would be fine. My friends kept talking about this amazing connection that felt with their babies when they were carrying them. But I never felt it with the twins.

And I thought that maybe once I held them in my arms I would finally feel it. That motherly connection. It never came. And I tried, John. I tried so hard. But I just can’t.

I do love them, I love them so much, but not the way you do. Not the way a parent loves their child It can’t do it, I’m sorry. I wasn’t meant to be a mother. Life is cruel that way sometimes.

If there’s one thing I’m certain of, it’s that you were meant for this. I can see it in the way you look at them. You can do this, John. I know.

Be the parent I will never be able to be.”

Y/n’s curious eyes scanned the paper excitedly. Her face showed a variety of emotions in the span of a few minutes. First, excitement and joy, then, confusion and finally, anger. The tip of her ears burned red, her hand shaking beneath the table.

John B. placed the paper on the table, a loud sigh escaping his lips. Though, compared to his sister, he seemed relatively calm.

Y/n couldn’t contain it anymore. She stormed out of the house, her feet shoeless and her shoulders bare. She had no idea where she was going, but she ran.

It didn’t matter. As long as she was going somewhere. As long as she was moving and running, then she wouldn’t have to think. And if she was thinking, then her mind would take her to a bad place. She didn’t want to go there. So she ran.

The Routledges were never reputed to be angry people, much less violent. They were generally very calm, maybe a bit arrogant, but always composed. Of course, when a Routledge was after something, they would do anything in order to obtain it.

But y/n was one of the exception. She was the first Routledge woman in nearly 150 years. For generations, every Routledge man had sons, who had sons, who had sons until her father. He had a son and a daughter.

She wasn’t an angry person or mean in any way. On the contrary, she was kind and gentle. But compared to her brother and her dad, she felt emotions deeply.

And maybe it was her mother’s side and not the Routledge in her. It was so intense, sometimes. Almost blinding, at some moments. It was like the emotions took over her. It didn’t happen very often but it felt like she didn’t control her body anymore.

When she finally came back to her senses, y/n was standing on an empty beach. She hadn’t realized how far she’d gotten until she felt the warm sand under her feet. A cold breeze wrapped itself around her shoulders. She was so far from home. And so alone.

She walked to the ocean, letting her toes dip gently into the water. The water was cold but calming. Her anger slowly disappeared with each breath she took, until finally she could see everything clearly again.

Y/n turned away. She thought of going back home, when a wave of emotions hit her. She fell to the ground. It was like the air had been sucked out of her lungs.

Her chest burned, she felt like she had swallowed fire. Her shoulders shook and loud sobs escaped her lips. She dug her hands into the sand, trying to ground herself. It didn’t stop her tears from crashing onto her shirt.

A shadow appeared in front of her and she recognized its shape in a matter of seconds. It could only be one person.

“Are you hear to laugh at me?” She said through tears.

“No, not this time,” said John B. He sat down beside her, his eyes looking into hers. “Oh, y/n.” He wiped the tears off of her face

“I’m sorry,” she sniffled. “It’s just that, that,” he placed his arm around her shoulder, she took a deep breath. “Part of me always thought that she would come back.”

“That she’d come stay with us and finally be our mom. But she’s never coming back, ever,” her tone was almost accusing. “I lost so much time making up scenarios for her and she doesn’t even love us.”

“You know that’s not true,” reasoned John.

“Yeah, but it feels like it.”

“We don’t need her anyway,” stated the boy. “We’ve got dad, surfing, plenty of fish and well, each other. It’s not that bad is it?”

“No, you’re right.” She looked at him. “I just feel like I’m missing out on something. Like I’m,” she paused, looking for the right word, “incomplete.”

“I get it. If the roles were reversed and dad wasn’t there, I guess I would feel that way too,” confided her brother. “But don’t give her this much power. She doesn’t get to make you feel this way. You’re whole on your own, y/n/n.”

“Thank you, bird.” She slid her arm around his shoulder, letting her head rest on top of it. “You know, you can be an amazing brother sometimes.”

“Sometimes?”

“Yeah, sometimes.”

“Hey, bird?” “Yeah?”

“How did you find me, anyway?”

“You always come here when you wanna be dramatic.”

“I do not!”

“You so do!”

And slowly, the imaginary memories fell apart and disappeared. Y/n didn’t need them anymore. She’d be better in the real world.

Taglist

@kaelyn-lobrutto24 @poguestyle17 @im-a-stranger-thing @lasnaro @thoughtsofthestars @briandaflores19 @lunaposey @allycat449-blog @ifilwtmfc @kitty084 @coloradogirl07 @ponyboys-sunsets @chaoticbisous @p0gue420 @sloaneemily @babygal-babygal @itsagurl @mendesmaybank

If you wanna be added or removed or if I forgot you, tell me and it’ll be modified!

[faeriejukyung]

True Beauty’s Gaping Mother Wound

*disclaimer*: I understand that all the listed traits are things which are often very common in Asian households, and it may seem that rather than being concerning, these are just a part of Asian culture. That is why, I feel that it’s necessary for me to make it clear that I am, in fact, Asian (Indian to be specific), and parental abuse is something that is extremely normalized here. As someone who has experienced it firsthand, I want to say that just because something is common/normal, doesn’t necessarily mean that it is correct. If you or anyone you know is in a situation like that, it’s very very important to speak out. And it’s not your fault, i know it’s easier to believe that way but it’s really not. We deserve to be in a loving environment, regardless of what culture we are born in.

Throughout the drama, Jukyung’s mother shows many traits of an abusive mother. I have been able to outline 4 of them. I don’t mean to write her off as an evil character,, because overall she is well intentioned, and just like any other mom, she does love Jukyung. This is shown in episode 8 too, where she shows remorse for her actions. That however, doesn’t justify her abusive behavioral patterns in any way. Because we can see how badly it affects Jukyung, her self esteem and her overall view of herself.

-

Act 1: “I’m going to kill you today and go to jail” -- Physical Violence.

Throughout the series, we see Jukyung's mother being very violent. But one scene which particularly stood out to me was the scene where she finds out about Jukyung's dad getting scammed. (in episode 1). While it is true that her dad caused a huge financial loss to the family, and anyone would feel angry in a situation like that, it is also true that there is never a good reason to physically abuse someone.

After hearing the news, Jukyung's mom is overcome by anger. It's completely okay to feel frustrated, but the way she violently jumped at her husband, clearly intentioned to hurt him, and the way she needed to be held back by juyoung and heekyung highlights her abusive nature. And this isn't a one time thing where she momentarily lost control of herself. She constantly shows similar behavioural traits throughout the drama.

In the scene where we see Jukyung's mom and dad together properly for the first time, their relationship dynamic is established. He's meekly massaging her shoulders while she orders him around. Their is an obvious power imbalance in the relationship, and the way Jukyung's dad cowers in fear around Jukyung's mom is a proof of that.

-

Act 2: "Why would you kill my precious son?" -- Conditional Love.

We see examples of Jukyung’s Mom’s conditional love in the kdrama AND in the webtoon. Conditional love is when a parent or a parental figure makes their child compete for love. They withhold their affection until the kid acts in ways that are desirable to them, and if the kid fails to do so, the parent often punishers them through different methods. This is their way of maintaining control over their children.

Jukyung’s Mom’s conditional love manifests itself in the form of favoritism towards her eldest daughter Heekyung, who’s not only conventionally beautiful but also very smart and has a high paying job, and towards her youngest child and only son, Juyoung, who is also written to be very attractive. Both Juyoung and Heekyung have gifts that Jukyung does not posses -- beauty and brains. The conditions that are established in order to attain their mother’s affection are getting good grades at school, and being conventionally attractive, which is why Jukyung often gets the shorter end of the stick

In the scene where we are first meet Heekyung is the drama, their mom’s affection towards her is very evident.

This is shown in the webtoon too.

She displays this favoritism towards Juyoung too, and even more so. In episode 1 where Jukyung tries makeup for the first time, and gets ridiculed by him for doing a bad job at it, she naturally feels angry and yells at him, “do you want to die?!”, but instead of telling Juyoung to stop, their mother yells at Jukyung for yelling at Juyoung (”why would you kill my precious son? why?”). It’s already very evident that Juyoung has picked up the habit of constantly taunting Jukyung for her face from his mom. In the webtoon, when Jukyung decides that she wants to pursue makeup arts and asks for her mom’s support and fees for academy, her mom flat-out refuses, saying that they don’t have enough money. However as we find out later, money wasn’t the problem, because she had enough money to send Juyoung to a cram school for acting.

I find it hard to believe that any good parent would constantly compare their children and pit them against each other like this. In the webtoon and the kdrama, it is made clear that Juyoung doesn’t have particularly good grades either, but he doesn’t have to face his mother’s wrath by the virtue of being good looking. Jukyung on the other hand, does not have any redeeming qualities.

-

Act 3: “I’m going to throw all your makeup away” --Excessive Anger.

Another sign of parental abuse is display of excessive anger. It’s usually used as an intimidation tactic to keep the child in line. Sometimes, it can simply happen because they lose control of themselves. Either way, parents who get angry more often than what is supposed to be normal, and hurt their children (physically or verbally) in the midst of their anger, repeatedly, are abusive. I feel like I don’t even need to elaborate on this one. Jukyung’s Mom is angry during half of her scenes. And the way she acts upon that anger crosses the limit too. Don’t get me wrong, it’s important to express your the way you feel, but the way Jukyung’s Mom does it, is extremely unhealthy and hurtful to others around her. Whether she’s jumping on Jukyung’s dad or talking down on Im Jukyung, she’s very inconsiderate of how her anger affects others. She almost always expresses herself in an extremely volatile way.

Jukyung described makeup as a hopeful light opening up a new life for her. There’s even a whole music segment of her discovering the powers of makeup, characterized by pastel and bubblegum tones, and the segment has a magical feel to it. Suffice to say that makeup brought an almost magical kind of hope and optimism to her life. In episode 6, Jukyung's Mom goes to her school to get her report card. When she sees her low grades, she gets so angry that she threatens to throw away her makeup, without once considering why Jukyung is so attached to it. In my eyes, she's actually very similar to Soojin's dad who also uses intimidation and physical violence to keep his daughter in line. If we put the same background music for the scenes where we see Jukyung's Mom threatening her, as the ones where Soojin's dad abuses her, they'd practically be identical. The only difference is that the show often plays Jukyung's Mom's behavior as a joke.

In episode 7, after seeing that Jukyung didn't improve as much as she wanted her to, she actually threw away all her makeup. Even though Jukyung did try, and did improve, it still wasn't enough for her mom. Jukyung's restlessness after not seeing her makeup on her table was palpable through the screen. Finding out that her mother threw all her makeup away sort became her breaking point. We see her yell at her mother and express her feelings for the first time.

I think it's important to note that Jukyung, who's already finds it very tough to reach out to her courageous side, was inspired by this incident to stand up to her mom, to express her outrage. Saying that makeup meant a lot to her is an understatement.

-

Act 4: "What's the point of looking beautiful with all that makeup on if you're ugly underneath?" -- Verbal Abuse.

We all get into arguments with our parents from time to time, and I’m sure we’ve all been yelled at by them at some point. Verbal abuse however, is not something that is normal, and the two shouldn’t be confused. A parent who constantly humiliates their child, yells and screams at them, talks down on them is in simple terms, an abuser. 

In episode 1, when Jukyung tries makeup on for the first time and goes to school, she gets ridiculed by her bullies and her classmates. Crestfallen, she returns back home after school and goes to her mother for reassurance. Instead of providing that, her mother ridicules her even more and calls her makeup “Ghost Makeup”. This is something abusers often do. Under the guise of teasing the victim, they often attack the victim’s self esteem, appearance etc, to make them feel insecure and to maintain their position of power over them. Jukyung’s mother isn’t very different from those bullies who told Jukyung that she was ugly and made her feel like she could never amount to anything. 

Another example that irks me a lot is from episode 3, when Jukyung’s Mom is chewing her out for being late, and suddenly the conversation turns to cosmetics and makeup. This is also one of the traits of verbal abuse. Instead of arguments surrounding the basic issue, they branch out and turn into character assassination. Her mom accuses Jukyung of wasting all her time on makeup instead of studying, even when Jukyung clarifies that she got late because she missed her bus, not because she was out buying cosmetics. But her mom doesn't listen and says to her, “What’s the point of looking beautiful with all that makeup on when you’re still ugly underneath?” 

Jukyung’s face after hearing her own mother say that was heartbreaking. Unfortunately, this type of mother-daughter relationship dynamic isn’t something  that is rare. Mothers frequently project their own insecurities on their daughters and put them down. Jukyung’s Mother’s behavior explains her self esteem issues, it gives an insight about where her insecurities really stem from. Sometimes our abuser’s thoughts and image of us start maligning our own self image. Frequently hearing them tell us that we are worthless, and that no one will ever marry us or love us, makes us believe that we are in fact, worthless and incapable of being loved unless we change something about ourselves. We frequently get an insight into how Jukyung thinks of herself throughout the drama. 

“It’s not my fault that I was born dumb” (In episode 7, after finding out that her mother threw away her makeup.)

“You know that I’m messed up” (In episode 2, referring to her face, while asking Lee Suho to keep her bare face a secret)

The drama is yet to end so I don’t want to completely write Jukyung’s Mother off as an abuser. I hope she becomes a better mom in the show, I really do. Because Jukyung deserves a loving mother. And Jukyung's mom does in fact have a few redeeming qualities, however, simply love and caring isn’t enough, you need mutual respect, reassurance and effort in each every relationship. We know that Jukyung’s mother is also often labelled as an ugly woman, and she believes that she could only get by through studying well. (“It’s going to be okay as long as you study well” - episode 1). In a world where a woman either has to a exceptionally beautiful to be considered worthy, or be exceptionally intelligent and professional lest she isn’t blessed by beauty, it’s very easy to internalize self hatred and direct it on to other individuals (especially if those individuals are your children). That is why i genuinely find myself rooting for Jukyung’s mother and hoping for a character development arc -- because i understand where she comes from, and because i can empathize with her. 

-

Fin.

[peanut-butter-parkerxx]

plane pillow

where peter planned to play video games with ned through the whole flight but fate decided to take another turn....

*A/N: this isnt related to far from home nor the ending of endgame, just pretend infinity and all the movies after didnt exist since i imagine pete 16 in here. i dont know why 16 i just like that age on him lmao, enjoy reading!*

pairing: peter x reader

status: strangerz (well sort of since they haven't talked to eachother but they're in the same school)

NOT PROOF READ BTW SO SORRY IF THERE ARE ANY MISTAKES

peter's POV

"the flight will be amazing! i heard they'd installed the new game we were talking about" i gushed to ned, excited for the whole flight to be filled with video games.

"im excited" ned stated practically jumping from excitement and i shook my head laughing

"OK CLASS!" Mr Harrington clapped his hands getting our attention "we're boarding the plane in a few minutes so pack your stuff and lets goooo" he pointed at our gate dramatically.

we walked to the gate, scanned our ticket and sat on our assigned seats, ned and i sat on the three seater, he took the window seat by winning a 3 round match of rock, paper, scissors *sighs angrily* and i obvious got the middle, kinda scared of who'll sit beside me though.

we had to wait for a few minutes, since we boarded the flight early. ned and i obviously started playing video games, too entranced by the small glowing screen infront of me i haven't realized a girl.

she hadn't really acknowledged me either because she looked tired, i cursed at the screen for losing the game too quickly and my dumb ass still didnt realize a GIRL, MY AGE, looking PRETTY FUCKING ADORABLE was sitting next to me. oh dear god.

after a couple more games and me being the most idiotic teenager known today for not looking at my right to see her  the flight attendant alerted us that the plane will take off so we the screen will freeze any moment. ned and i decided to sleep, it was very early in the morning and we need to rest if we plan on gaming most of the flight.

i closed my eyes and shifted a bit in my seat, and slept. the plain was moving at the time trying to find the best place to take off. i guess i was really tired that i havent felt someone sleeping on my shoulder.

i was peacefully sleeping still agitated from the uncomfortable seat but i heard a loud noise that frightened the life out of me and due to my spidey senses i sensed a hand on my right, so what did i do? i fucking held the hand. hard, may i add, from the fright.

i opened my eyes quickly and jumped a bit, turning around to see who's the stranger that i held hands with, startled as well. i sighed in relief knowing our plane was safe and it was just about to take off. but then i took a good look on the perso- her, took a good look on her, on her? OH MY GOD ITS A GIRL calm down peter and please dont scare her off. i couldnt stop looking at her and to my luck she was looking at me as well, but none of us spoke

i couldnt help but notice the small part of her y/h/c hair that was shown from her hood looked so shiny and smooth, her eyes were the most perfect shade of y/e/c. the extremely large hoodie looked so comfortable on her which made me think of her wearing one of mine, how big and long it'll look on her body sent butterflies to my stomach. she looked small, and precious so fragile yet she held her body confidently.

the voice of the flight attendant echoed through the speakers which made us both stop our trance of one another. even though the lady's voice wasnt scary it still frightened us. i mean no hate towards miss attendant she called me a cutie and gave me extra blankets

but coz we got startled again we held hands....again looking for the sources of the noise. we visibly relaxed once we realized what it was, looked at eachother and laughed, her laugh was angelic and soft, hands down the best sound ive ever head. she looked rather embarrassed from the encounter but i bet you a thousand dollars i look worse, i could practically feel the blood rush through my cheeks once she realized how long ive stared at her

"i- uhm i-im so sorry for sleeping on your shoulder, and- and holding your hand and stuff" she apologized, it only made me even more baffled by her. how could a voice match with a face so perfectly.

"no no its fine uhh i dont mind *nervous laugh* and for the hand thing i was the one who grabbed yours so i-i should be the one apologizing...im sorry" i rubbed the back of my neck. this is why i dont talk to girls, ever. well mj is an exception since shes like the closest thing i have to a friend other than my best friend obviously.

"i-im y/n, by the way" she lifted her hand properly introducing herself

"peter, peter parker" i shook her hand, it was nice feeling the warmth of her hand again. we probably held hands (for the third time today by the way) longer the we should have but who am i to say i was bothered. i definitely wasnt.

"nice to meet you peter" she smiled shaking our hands one last time then sitting it on her lap. scratch what i said about her gorgeous laugh, hearing her say my name was the best thing ive heard in my 16 year of existence. (her laugh is obviously the second best)

before i could ask anything else, the plane decided to finally take off. i adjusted myself to the seat, not turning to my right side anymore and closed my eyes trying to think of smiling puppies. ive been on a plane before, in fact a private one last year but that was it. this is my second time flying away from new york and i was a bit nervous.

y/n somehow noticed my sudden tense form, who am i kidding i looked like i was about to die coz of my nerves. and held my hand. and i immediately opened my eyes again, the feeling of her skin coming in contact with mine brought chills down my spine, good ones obviously

"you looked rather tense, is this ok?" she leaned into my ear so i could hear her. i looked at her confused on why she would want to help me but nodded as a reply. a smile crept on my face and i couldnt seem to take it off.  the take off went smoothly thank god. and ive occasionally squeezed her hand, usually when the plane made very loud sounds. but i made it! woohoo

i didnt know if i should stop holding her hand or not, even though i didnt want to. will she think im a creep? and if i did, will she think im rude? but i guess it didnt seem to bother her if she went back to sleeping. so i figured i should do the same

i shifted in my seat a couple of times trying to get the perfect comfy spot....nothing. this seat will be the death of m-

"you can sleep on my shoulder if you want" she whispered. "i figured since you let me sleep on yours which im very sorry about, you could sleep on mine" she smiled

"thanks, but i dont wanna bother you or make you uncomfortable"

"oh nonsense! my body is screaming right now cheering for me, well partially scolding at me for saying something risky like that to a good looking guy, its ok" she laughed, her eyes widened in shock from what she confessed. i smiled at her and rested my head on her shoulder

"you think im good looking?" i whispered playing with our fingers, i dont know when i got the sudden confidence but hearing someone like her think a loser like me is cute did something to me.

"shut up" she playfully shoved me and i laughed.

"are you from midtown?" i asked her

"no im from queens" she joked

"oh you're definitely from midtown" i chuckled, next thing i know i was having a normal conversation with me laying my head on a girl i just met like we knew eachother for years, it was nice to talk to a girl i potentially thought was cute instead of talking gibberish

she was very understanding and looked like interested into what i was saying, i was gonna skip my geeky side when she asked about what i like but to my surprise, she mentioned it when i asked her the same, she said she loves comics and likes watching sci fi movies. i asked her if she watched star wars and she said she didnt...yet.

"wanna uhm watch it together?" i played with her fingers absentmindedly nervous if she'd reject me.

"yeah sure" her eyes lit up like she was waiting for me to ask her that. we watched the movie in bliss, thankfully she liked it! and immediately said to put the second one. and surprise surprise, we finished it.

when the credits rolled in, i saw her yawning, shifting in her seat again, i decided to be bold so i lifted her head off my shoulder pulled the arm rest away from us, took a pillow and patted my lap. immediately after doing it i regretted it, she barely knows me, what the fuck peter.

"you sure?" she asked smiling a bit, she looked like she felt something giddy inside which made me feel at peace again and i nodded.

"good night" she whispered snuggling her head on my lap, i hesitantly put my arm over

"good night, y/n" and we fell asleep like how ned slept the whooole time i was talking to her, wow we have a lot to catch up on

bonus:

peters pov

i didnt know the whole plane (our class) practically gushed over my interaction with y/n, i know its been a while since i liked a girl but betty and the rest (including Mr Harrington) practically begged mj to take photos of us since she was the closest, not that she wouldnt have done it without them asking her....

*A/N: idk what this bonus was lmao but i had to add the school feeling happy for our boy pete*

have a wonderful morning/afternoon/evening/night!

-quacksonlover

[sokkas-honour]

#17 for the spotify wrapped with zuko! <3

prom queen - zuko x reader

pairing: zuko x fem!reader

wc: 1k (it’s a short one, i didn’t feel like exploring this song too much as i associate it with a certain sort of my life. i also didn’t put too much effort into tbh, again for the same reason)

warning: if you’re sensitive to body image talk, possible diet talk, possible starvation mention, please don’t go any further. i tried to keep it as light as possible but i did project onto it a bit.

notes: i cherry picked lyrics that work best for this, and the least triggering ones. its kinda of a part two to detention as requested by @aangsupremacy (hopefully this works for you), just not a direct one.

wish i was like you, blue-eyed blondie, perfect body,

she was everything you could never be. with beautiful long black hair and an elegance that you only wish you could have. but most of all, she had the firelord’s attention, she had his heart. she had his attention ever since they were children and it was foolish of you to ever imagine things going differently.

it was foolish of you to think he’d even fall for you, the waterbender who’d been tasked to be his bodyguard ever since you two were children. it was foolish of you to think that, even though you two had been through so much together, you still would never even cross his mind as anything more than a simple friend.

all the nights you two spent on that boat, giving him a space to talk when he needed it. you had always been there for him, you were with him every step of the way from the agni kai to ba sing se, to joining the avatar and defeating ozai. you two had grown close during that time and you genuinely thought that something was happening between the two of you, but you couldn’t be further from the truth. you had forgotten that the affection that zuko felt towards mai transcended any relationship that you had built up with him. spirits did you wish you were her.

maybe I should try harder, you should lower your beauty standards,

you remembered the comments you used to get while on the boat, your body constantly being picked apart by middle aged men who didn’t have any better to do then to bodyshame a teenager. being away from the crew, a weight had been lifters off your shoulders when you found a group of friends that never said anything about your appearance nor found anything wrong with it.

you should’ve realised that when you agreed to join zuko as his advisor that the picking apart would get worse. his cabinet was still very closed minded and judgemental, none of them liked the idea of a waterbender from a watertribe to be the one advising the leader of the firenation, none of them seemed to remember that your whole childhood was spent in between these walls.

most of the time, words were never said directly to you but usually were whispers strategically placed to make sure you heard what they all thought about you. it hurt a lot but you were able to push down all of your emotions until one day, when someone who used to be a part of zuko’s crew, came to help him around the place. the crew had caught on that despite how much he aggravated you, you had a thing for zuko, so he of course made fun of you for it in front of the firelord’s officers who knew of his current relationship status. and that’s when things started to go down hill.

“i’m going to find the firelord and see what he thinks about it.” it all started when you were having a meeting with some of his esteemed generals and admirals, he was absent so you took his place which meant that some people thought it was fun to try and take advantage of your lack of authority. the only way to settle the current argument was to grab the firelord himself and drag zuko into the mess that only he could clean.

“wouldn’t want to do that, his girlfriend might think you’d want to steal him.” a misplaced teasing rang from general tao, one who seemed to always be against you.

“please, mai would take one look at her and not even think that she’d pose a threat. i mean have you seen her body?” another voice inserted himself into the conversation and you started to feel like you’d wish that you could just evaporate into thin air.

“not to mention that marrying someone from the watertribe would be absolutely dishonourable.” general sho added, a smirk on his face as he knew that all of their comments were affecting you. sho was definitely someone who liked to pretend that he didn’t miss ozai, just like half of the people in the room that laughed at the jokes.

“meeting adjourned.” you exclaimed, not wanting to even deal with them any longer and just go to your room and cry about what had happened. you were the first to stand up and go to the leave the room but right as you were about to leave, you heard one more comment.

“go cry about it, maybe you can waterbend it or, even better, loose a little.” it was the last straw and you felt your eyes prick with tears but you couldn’t show total weakness so you held your composure and scurried to your room, making sure to avoid absolutely anyone.

im no quick-curl barbie, i was never cut out for prom queen,

when you closed the door to your chamber, you threw yourself on your bed and just cried, letting all the words that everyone had ever said get to you. you knew that you weren’t ever going to make a good ruler, which is probably for the best that mai is a good contender for the position seeing as she and zuko are madly in love.

but spirits did you wish you were. you weren’t the regal type, you weren’t elegant, you weren’t raised as someone important, you were raised as a bodyguard who’s entire worth was based on wether or not you could protect the future firelord. not matter how much you tried to get over him, you couldn’t. your entire self worth had been based around him since a young age so of course it continued into your early adult years. your whole life had been intertwined with zuko and your destinies, at least that’s what you thought, were always going to be shared in a way.

maybe that’s why you tried your hardest to always be nice to him, be there for him, be a friend for him even when he didn’t want one. sometimes you wondered if you actually did love him or if it was just that if he did love you, you would actually feel like you had a place. you’d always conclude that it was the first, just seeing him happy and smile made your heart race as a fast as a rollercoaster. no one else had ever done that to you.

you remembered the one time you had ever lashed out at zuko. you were grieving and he was being selfish. you had always given him the space to talk about his feelings so you expected the same, only, it took you ignoring him for a couple of days for him to finally understand that friendship was a two way street, even when he was banished.

after that, zuko always listened to you when you needed it and spirits did you wish he was there now. you don’t exactly know what you’d tell him but in right now, you craved him just rubbing your back soothingly and letting you air out what was on your mind. those moments weren’t too common but they were precious.

you were ready to just recompose yourself in your room alone but you jumped a bit when you heard someone knock at the door.

“shit.” you mumbled, quickly trying to find somewhere to look at your reflection to wipe the tears and boy was that going to be a problem. your eyes were red, cheeks were puffy and heavily tear stained, and your hair was disheveled from gripping it as you sobbed.

there was nothing you could do but pray that whoever was behind that door was just a guard coming by to tell you something, they never commented on your current appearance as they were used to seeing the firelord in unpleasant circumstances.

you took a deep breath in and went to open the door. you felt your heart stop when you saw your best friend with a huge smile on his face.

“hey y/n, i-" zuko started off his greeting with the cheeriest voice you’d ever heard from him but the tone quickly switched once he registered that you had been crying. “are you okay?”

“yeah zuko, i’m fine.” you lied, fully aware that he could see that you weren’t and the lie was useless, but you couldn’t talk about what was going on with zuko.

“y/n i know you’re lying, you’re my best friend. and you look like you’ve just been crying.” zuko placed his hand on your cheek and rubbed his thumb gently from side to side. you sighed and leaned into it, savouring the affectionate moment.

“it’s fine, it’s nothing important.” you mumbled after a couple of seconds were spent in silence, not knowing if this was the time to tell him about the treatment that you’d received from his generals and the love that you had for him.

“you know you can tell me anything, right y/n? i learned that a while ago thanks to you. i come to you for help and advice, and vice versa.” he insisted, removing his hand, much to your dismay. his eyes filled with concern as he wasn’t going to just dismiss your feelings like the last time he’d found you crying.

“i don’t want to talk about it right now, maybe at another time.” you compromised, figuring that in a day or so you could finally come forward about it without breaking down.

“deal.” he smiled, glad that you had accepted his help.

“but you had news to tell me, so don’t let the way i look keep you from telling me.” you returned his smile, changing your tone to one of intrigue at the wonder of what got your friend so excited.

“mai said yes to the trip!” he announced giddily.

“the trip to?” you asked confused, if he had discussed this trip with you, you had completely forgotten.

“the trip where i plan to propose to her! i’m pretty sure i told you about this the other week.” he clarified, slightly confused as to why you didn’t remember as in his memory, he had talked it out with you a couple of weeks prior.

“oh yeah, that trip.” you felt your heart drop, you completely forgot about that, it was the last hope of zuko ever loving you as more than a friend, it was already small to begin with but now it was nonexistent. she would say yes and you’d have to live with the knowledge that you never said anything to him, you’d have to live with and help the new firelady, you’d have to see them rule the nation as you’d just think about your unrequited love.

“we leave the day after tomorrow, do you think she’ll say yes?” the firelord was nervous about a girl, your heart broke a bit knowing that you never had that affect on him but it was to her fault for keeping your feelings to yourself.

“of course she will zuko. the two of you are perfect for each other. you’re handsome, a great friend, you’re always there for your friends, you always want what’s best for everyone, and youre a great ruler. and mai, mai’s just drop dead gorgeous.” you rambled, not realizing that you might have raised his suspicions at your listing of his qualities but all it did was make him more confident, he must’ve only seen your small confession as a planotic one.

“thank you y/n. and when i get back, i’ll find someone for you so we can have double dates!” he exclaimed excitedly.

“yeah zuko, that’d be great.” if only he knew that the only person for you was him. you only gave him a half smile before he turned around to do whatever, leaving you alone in your room with something more to cry about.

if im pretty, will you like me? they say "beauty makes boys happy"

a little while after he left, you went out of your room to go clear your mind next to one of the turtle duck ponds. as you sat down to watch the adorable animals, you saw mai pass down the hallway that opened to the courtyard. she spotted you and waved, not bothering to stop as she probably had somewhere to be. you waved back but it made you realise something.

as you looked at your reflection, you thought of how beautiful mai was and how average you were. you’d never compare to her beauty, meaning zuko would never look at you and think ‘woah’. maybe no one would ever see you as the most gorgeous person in the four nations, all you’d be was someone who let the love of their life live with his life without knowing about your feelings.

maybe it was time to move out of the firepalace, the guards didn’t seem to like you and the comments started to get too much to hide the way it hurt you. you wouldn’t have to watch zuko and mai act all lovey dovey. youd finally move on from your life where your whole worth was based around the banished prince turned firelord. maybe you’d find love with someone who saw you as their whole world just like zuko did with mai.

maybe your life would be better.

atla taglist: @draqondance @biqherosix @missmorosis @firelady-jay

zuko taglist: @duh-dobrik

[vaguely-concerned]

The Mandalorian Chapter 15 reactions; *nobby nobbs voice* ‘s all gone a bit percychological, sir

 - so from both chapter 6 and now this: rick famuyiwa is incredible at portraying prolonged discomfort and tension (and also at getting din’s endless love for that baby across through the stress of being separated from him. this is the very first episode with no baby in it at all, isn’t it? wow that’s a heartbreaking milestone to reach im crying)

I liked this episode SO MUCH but I had to pause it pretty often and take a breather because it all made me so viscerally uncomfortable on din’s behalf -- not just the armour and having to take the helmet off and be seen for the (almost, ilu IG-11) first time in decades, people keep touching him in this episode when he clearly doesn’t want them to but can’t stop it and it makes me want to claw my own skin off in sympathy, it’s so awful. that’s really neat film making to manage to keep that tension steady almost all the way through!!! 

honestly this episode felt a little bit like psychological horror, with the cheering storm troopers and din in the wrong armour and clearly not digging it and there’s the palpable absence of baby and that ever present dread of being Perceived when you’re not ready for it; everything’s turned upside down from how it should be. and it’s playing with that discomfort both in the main character and in us, the audience, in having the familiar be made unfamiliar and also introducing these questions that shake up everything (that feeling you get of ‘but... if it’s not the helmet, and not the armour, but there’s his face, but we’ve only seen that face once before so it’s still basically new to us, is this... is this still him. is this still Dad’ (oooh I wonder if we’re... sort of getting some of the ??? the baby would be feeling about it too?) we’ve all imprinted on that t-shaped visor like little baby birds, and this was a very clever episode to break us out of that and start to really get used to the thought of him having several faces that are real simultaneously, in a way, and not just a voice. it’s all very smart and interesting and I’m sure I’ll have a lot of incoherent thoughts about this in the weeks to come lol)    

- the actual reason din can’t take off the helmet is that if people were able to see his wide confused puppy eyes they would no longer find it in themselves to send him on long arduous side missions and would help him immediately just so he’d feel better, and that would rob us of like 80% of the content for this show 

mayfeld in this episode: clearly a casualty of this. he literally sees one glimpse of the vulnerability there and then within five seconds goes on to materialize a few redeeming character traits after being a complete jackass for an episode and a half. (I mean. he was 100% still an imperial so I’m a bit ‘hm.’ about how easily especially cara let him off the hook, but with the way it was set up I guess it would have been quite shitty of them to just throw him back in prison so I mean I GUESS. I would be endlessly grateful someone got my awkward bff out of there alive and well too I suppose)

- I actually think din’s sense/integrity of self has gotten so much stronger and more resilient (though probably still quite fragile pls handle with care precious cargo within); if this had happened in the first season I think it might honestly just have killed him (and if it weren’t for IG-11 it probably would have lol)

- can you beLIEVE din is so bad at lying that they literally should plan for contingencies over it fjkasdlhfskajdhfsdj     

- very grateful for the scene with the spear throw that’s basically there to reassure us ‘uh-huh, he absolutely knows how to use it, don’t worry about that part at least’

I want to make a whole post about that fight scene, though, it’s just so GOOD! there’s so much storytelling and characterization in it! even out of the armour din has some real hand to hand MOVES!! he clearly came out of that aching all over, he can barely get back in his seat!!!

- so what I’m mainly taking away from this is that din absolutely cuts his own hair and you know what? he does a good job considering the conditions he has to work under, I love him  

I still find it so goddamn darling that he meticulously maintains that little mustache/stubble combo under there even when there’s every reason to believe no one will ever see it 

I suppose we can also gather that he did not ask cobb about whatever insane feat of magic he’s come up with to avoid helmet hair, but I don’t care looking a bit frazzled and tousled is exactly right for him (he’s so put together when he’s in the armour and a MESS when he’s out of it and I  l o v e  it) 

- boba fett is honestly so fucking hot in this I don’t know what to do with myself haha. he’s so CALM and CALCULATED and COLLECTED in his newly painted armour and he’s GOT THIS and he made that ‘I’ve got one of those faces. one of jango’s many, many, many faces’ joke and he’s so thicc now, he looks like he could easily lift me over his head with one hand and he’s just quietly steady and undramatically supportive and sdalfhsdjhfsa 

- ...din does know who the clone troopers were, right. I mean of course he does. he has to. but does he though. I’m sure he does and just wasn’t thinking. 

- no matter how stressful it was I’m still really grateful that in the end taking the helmet off was something din got to do himself -- it’s under some duress, but it’s still his choice and for the sake of the baby, and almost in two more manageable steps between putting on the storm trooper gear for a different helmet before taking it off altogether. it’s not something done to him by gideon, for example, that would be. so much yuckier and worse. he still has that control and agency intact, even if it’s been tested really hard, and now gideon doing that doesn’t hold the exact same nightmarish power anymore because there’s already a little space opened in din’s mind for different things it can mean, if you see what I mean. I’m not sure I see what I mean actually I just have a lot of feelings haha. so I guess thank you mayfeld for being decent about it and helping him towards that realization that he can still be himself outside these really really inflexible structures he’s set up around himself for like. stability and keeping himself upright for a really long time, and that even someone halfway decent won’t disrespect the boundaries he still has about it at any given moment. man there’s a lot in this episode isn’t there

- the sigh din gave when he saw even more pirates coming and knew he had to get back up... never has a single moment in cinema better captured how I feel about being alive. most relatable man in the world din djarin

- it was really cruel of them to make me listen to din’s dead bleak voice say ‘the child is gone’ again, it wrecks my heart every goddamn time 

- again... I wish carano wasn’t Like That in real life because the cara & fennec scenes should have been everything I could ever dream. ah well fennec was still wonderful and if I just allow myself to think in-universe for a few seconds it was really touching that din would entrust cara with his entire armour, that’s some prime BrOTP energy right there

I love that we got two female characters who were just allies and working together, no competition or nothin’. listen the bar is low but it’s nice to see something actually leap gracefully over it as well lol

- this was one of those with some pretty big open plot holes (why, exactly, would a scan of a completely unknown face be helpful to get into this classified system lol), but a) I don’t care, the emotional storyline was so sound it doesn’t really matter and b) eh handwave handwave let’s say mayfeld programmed that little stick with the good shit and overrode the code saying there needed to be an identity match within the system, it’s all fine 

- I know I joke a lot about this but din really is one of the most relatable characters I’ve ever had. just watching him struggle with eye contact and going pretty much nonverbal under enough stress is like. wow a bit close to home there could we, perhaps, nOT?? (honestly though these are trauma/anxiety things I really don’t see portrayed a lot, especially in protagonists, it’s so odd but healing to see it in a character I love and who’s EXTREMELY competent in many other settings)

- din repeating gideon’s speech back to him word for word (except for the crucial detail that he calls grogu ‘him’ instead of ‘it’ 😭😭😭) and saying nothing else is truly Everything. I’ve said some stuff about din’s deliberate and thoughtful relationship to language in the past and this is such an amazing example of it; he’s remembered that pitch perfect all this time, he’s kept it around in his head and mulled it over and then redeployed it to change the meaning of it completely from dehumanization to love. can you. can you even imagine. and it’s yet another example of his hilarious wonderful petty streak and I can never get enough of it fasjhdfkjalhs    

- din always noticing the children first and foremost Y_______Y (the kids running by is the only thing you see him sort of acknowledge when he’s walking into the covert in season 1 too)  

- please... please I just need him to be able to hold that baby against his chest all safe and sound and okay again I can’t it’s........ hh

NO SEASON END CLIFF HANGER ON THIS I AM  B E G G I N G  YOU 

- I would be having some thoughts about how much space there actually is on slave 1 and what that might mean (do not kill boba again please don’t kill him again), but honestly there’s only ‘GET BABY’ hours in here now, I can’t speculate about anything