#it wasn't even good fiction it had so many holes it was see through

[doesnotloveyou]

dj, ily but why do none of your movies make sense??

[witchywcmans]

AGAINST THE LAW. | KEN RYUGUJI

synopsis ━━ after one too many trips to the auto repair shop with your old car, you realize you can focus on your work tasks so much better in the waiting room. but when the head mechanic notices you've been loitering, you recognize him instantly: ken ryuguji. there’s zero chance you’re getting out of this one. (older!draken x f!reader.)

content warnings ━━ missionary position on a motorcycle (hey, this is fiction), cunnilingus + fingering, praise, semi-public sex, multiple orgasms, dirty talk, pet names (i.e. cherry), mentions loss of virginity in the past, mutual pining, au as helllll, draken is in his late 20s and a mechanic. nsfw (minors + ageless blogs dni).

word count ━━ 5.2k

song inspiration ━━ one for the road, arctic monkeys / one of the girls, the weeknd / fallen star, the neighbourhood

author's note ━━ ok off the bat, I just wanna say this fic was completely inspired by this movie called wait with me. my friends and I like to watch passionflix movies for the laughs, but this one wasn't. well horrible. if you watch it, don't expect oscar-worthy performances, but it was fun and stupid and yeah, it made me think about what if part of this concept was applied to draken when he was older, workin as a mechanic. idk. I'm not caught up on the manga whatsoever so take this as a major au lol

Your car was a piece of shit, but that wasn’t the only reason you ended up sitting in the waiting room at the mechanic’s more than usual. A police officer would call it loitering. You, on the other hand, called it a safe space. For the past couple of weeks, your car had been in and out of the shop due to a faulty ignition sensor that your mechanic couldn’t nail down until your car broke down on the side of the highway. For the third time. Needless to say, it had been a stressful past month. The car issues had been one thing, but then there was all the pressure at work. And for some reason, you began to find comfort in working at the mechanic’s waiting room.

Your work as a journalist was very important to you. A perfectionist at heart, you needed to be in the right zone, the right state of mind, to write. Unfortunately, you weren’t someone who could sit at your desk at home for hours, typing away at the speed of light, and you definitely couldn’t focus at a coffee shop. You tried a plethora of other places. The local park: your laptop died. The library: teenagers still whispered too loud even in the quietest of places. The McDonald's parking lot: you got distracted by your hunger. Nowhere was right … until you were forced to work from your mechanic’s waiting room while he worked on your car. 

Even when your mechanic figured out the issue, you couldn’t help but sneak in through the entrance late mornings and work on your articles. The waiting room was just so … quiet, even more quiet than a library. There was hardly anyone in there besides the retired folk who could wait all day for their car to be fixed. You had a coffee machine at your disposable – not good coffee, but good enough – and a selection of snacks from the vending machine. It was pure bliss. You liked to hole yourself up in the corner, picking out different outfits that would conceal your face enough, and type away until the sun began to set. No one said a word to you. No one batted an eye.

So, as you can see, it was a surprise to you when someone eventually approached you two months into your loitering scheme.

It was just about closing time and you were shoving your laptop in your backpack after sending off another draft to your editor. A pair of feet appeared in front of your chair, and when you looked up at the young mechanic chewing on the end of a toothpick, you knew you were fucked. 

“Toyota,” he said without missing a beat, knowing your car from the top of his head, “ignition sensor, right?”

You paused, sliding on your backpack. Could you make a break for it? “Um … correct.”

“That was fixed weeks ago,” he said, slapping a dirty rag on his shoulder, car keys dangling from the other hand. 

Your mouth went completely dry. How the fuck could you explain this without coming off as a total weirdo? Your hands gripped the straps of your backpack for dear life. This was so embarrassing.

Before you could reply, the young mechanic gestured to the back door with his chin. “Follow me,” he said. “Boss wants to talk to ‘ya.”

Fuck, fuck, fuck. Still fiddling with your backpack straps, you knew there was no choice but to follow this guy. He led you through the back door and into the main workshop area of the shop. There were some cars left on a few lifts, ready to be inspected tomorrow, and the shelves packed with parts seemed to be in disarray. Besides that, there was no one in here but you, the young mechanic, and whoever this “boss” was still working in the back of the shop. You had never met the owner of the shop before; you typically worked with your mechanic and no one else.

You took down the hood that you’d been wearing today. There was no use in hiding your face now.

“Here she is, boss,” the man beside you said, still twirling those keys. “Can I go home now?”

“Yeah, yeah,” the boss replied, hidden behind the huge motorcycle he was working on. “Good work today.”

The younger man left, the bell above the office door jingling, and now it was just two: you and this so-called boss you’d never met. You stood there in silence, hands fidgeting with anxiety, as you waited for the boss to say something. From behind the motorcycle, all you could see was a flash of blonde hair and smoke puffing out into the dingy air. It smelled like motor oil and cigarettes back here.

You lifted your foot – maybe it was time to try and sprint out – but then a deep voice entered the work space.

“You know that loitering is against the law, right?”

That voice … it was familiar, but you couldn’t put a pin on it. And then, the boss was standing up, and you saw the tuft of blonde hair slicked back, the shaved sides on his head. That infamous dragon tattoo still on his left temple. The little hoop on his left ear was accompanied by a few other small piercings. He was still the same height – over six feet – but had grown some muscle. His hands were calloused from all those years of fighting, and now, from heavy labor. And those eyes … they were still as stormy and dark as the first day you saw him in school.

This wasn’t just embarrassing. This was mortifying.

“C’mon, Cherry,” Draken said, instantly recognizing you and your old nickname, “you know you can’t loiter in my shop.”

Cherry. You hadn’t been called that since … well, since high school. Your classmates hadn’t started calling you that because of a specific physical trait. To your face, you were told the nickname was for your quick skill of tying a cherry stem into a knot with your tongue. You had been the best, after all. But unbeknownst to you, the nickname came from when Mikey Sano, the infamous former leader of the Tokyo Manji Gang, popped your cherry.

You hadn’t even liked Mikey at the time. You were just sweet sixteen, and he was a year older, and you had assumed it would be better for your first to be someone with experience. Unfortunately, Mikey Sano had no experience. The sex had been awkward and terrible, as most first times between teenagers are, but at least you could say that you lost your virginity to the leader of Toman. Your eyes had always been on someone else, though. Someone who you had been too nervous to talk to, who you had only shared just a few interactions with. You never had a crush on Mikey as a teenager; you had always liked –

“Draken,” you said finally, shock lining your voice. Your eyes formed into wide saucers. It had been so long, and he was here. This whole time. Right under your nose. How surprised did you look right now?

He chuckled, wiping his hands off on a rag. The cigarette dangling from his lips was plucked out, and he stabbed it into an ashtray. “Don’t look so surprised.”

Oh, so you did look that shocked to see him.

He threw the tool he’d been using on a bench and stepped around the bike. “I really don’t go by Draken anymore,” he continued, sitting down on the rusted motorcycle, stretching his legs out. “Just call me, Ken.”

You were speechless. Were you breathing right now? You had to admit … you still found him to be handsome. He always had been. God, you were obsessed with him in high school, but always hid your crush in the shadows. Not even your friends knew about it, but you’d made it obvious, even if you didn’t know it. And now … he’d gotten better with age. The lines underneath his eyes told a story, as well as the scars etched into his veiny forearms. He could have more that you couldn’t see underneath the tattoos on his arms. Your mouth was so dry from staring at him that you had to lick the corners of your lips.

“Ken,” you said in a single breath, lacing your hands together in front of your body. You hadn’t moved from your spot, even when he was looking at you so casually. “I’m so sorry for loitering. Please, don’t call the cops on me. Or something. I have a reason –”

“Me? Call the police?” He laughed again, and it was just like how you remembered. “Do you know me at all, Cherry?”

Once you found the courage to breathe again, you stepped forward. Then another. And another. “I guess I don’t,” you shrugged, still playing with your hands. “I guess I just knew of you.”

“And I knew of you, all those years ago.” He smiled like you two were in on a secret. The rag that had been in his hands was tossed onto his left shoulder. He was wearing a pair of grey coveralls stained with oil, but the top half was unzipped and tied around his waist, leaving him in just a white tank top on his torso, which hugged his muscles so nicely. “So, tell me then. What’s the reason for your loitering?”

This had to be the most words shared between you two than all those years at school together. You thought about pinching yourself, just to check if this was all part of an elaborate dream. Or nightmare, depending on how it ended.

“Um …” You rubbed the back of your neck, blushing slightly. “Well, you see … the waiting room at your shop is very … quiet.”

His brow raised. “So I’ve been told.” He stared you down. “C’mon, out with it.”

“You’re going to make fun of me.”

“I will not.”

“Yes, you will.”

“How do you know that?”

“Because we went to school together!”

“Oh, you know that means noth –”

“I’m a journalist and I write my articles better in your waiting room,” you finally answered, crossing your arms over your chest. “There. I said it.”

Draken couldn’t stop himself from laughing. He knew he promised, but the giggles bubbled up inside him, forcing themselves to emerge. You looked at him incredulously, blinking too fast. All you wanted right now was to crawl into a hole and be left alone. You had to find a new mechanic after this.

“You said you wouldn’t make fun of me,” you sighed.

He waved his hand as his laughter died down. “I’m not. I promise.” Finally, his shoulders sagged again and he stood up. “I think it’s really cool that you … like my waiting room so much.”

You found your lips pulling into a smile at the same time as him. The tension broke and you felt your dimples crease. “I also like all the little snacks in the machine.”

“And the coffee?” He added.

You shrugged. “Could use some work.”

Draken laughed again, and just the sound of it made butterflies form in your stomach. You never had such a reaction to someone laughing before. What was wrong with you?

He stuck his hands in the front pockets of his coveralls. “It’s … really nice to see you again, Cherry.”

You mimicked his actions, instead sliding your hands into the back pockets of your jeans. “You too, Ken.”

“I won’t bust you for loitering, by the way. Even if it is against the law,” he chuckled under his breath, whipping the rag off his shoulder once again. “Come over here. Let me show you what I’m working on.”

His tone was so casual, as if years hadn’t passed between you two, as if this wasn’t the most you talked in years. You set your backpack down and approached him in front of the bike. Your fingers ran over the slope of the seat, all new despite the rusty exterior of the motorcycle. “That’s new leather,” he informed you. “Feel free to test it out. I need someone else’s butt on this thing so I know if I chose a good material.”

You giggled, all light and flirty. You simply couldn’t help it, especially when he looked at you with those dark eyes, the corners creasing when he smiled. Without missing a beat, you sat down on the side of the bike, like he had minutes ago, and looked up at him. He was tall, but from this seat, he was even taller. 

He pointed to the wheel of the bike, and then the headlight. “I just started replacing the …” His voice drowned out as you simply focused on his lips. His mouth quirked as he explained what he fixed so far on the bike. You watched his finger dance around the bike, taking in the rough exterior of his hands up close. They were so much bigger now, amongst other things –

“So how’s that seat?”

You blinked, bringing yourself out of your horny stupor. “Oh, um – comfy. Very comfy.” You cleared your throat. “So … is this for a customer?”

“It’s mine. This is a personal project,” he explained, leaning slightly to the left, closer to you. “I wouldn’t be working on anything this late except if it was for me.”

His eyes were on you again, drinking you in as you sat on the bike. He placed his hand on the fuel tank, so close to yours. Your stomach was definitely doing flip-flops now, especially when you noticed the way his eyes raked down your figure. You wished you’d chosen something better to wear, something other than a pair of jeans and a cropped hoodie, but you’d only expected to be getting work done in the waiting room today. Not to be confronted by your old school crush. But it looked like it didn’t matter to him. The way he was looking at you … it felt like you were naked.

“It really is nice to see you again,” he said, voice just slightly above a whisper. His stance changed and he moved to stand between your legs.

You bit your lip for a moment. “You already said that.”

“You’re right. Uh … I …” He looked down at his hands, flexing them, breaking his nerves. “You just … look very pretty … sitting on my bike.”

You looked down at yourself. The way you sat with your legs spread wide was anything but attractive, and it wasn’t like you were wearing a cute, little dress. “I do?”

But when you lifted your stare again, his face was so much closer to yours. He was leaning down now, bracing two hands on the leather seat, and trying to pretend like he wasn’t inhaling your perfume. You just smelled … so good. Like strawberries and apples and … cherries. Red, ripened cherries. And the way you were sitting on that seat, eyes wide and cheeks blushing from being caught earlier. Fuck, it reminded him of the first time he saw you in high school. He had been a horny teenager, of course, but the way he saw you tie that cherry stem with your tongue … you were the first person he ever jerked off to the thought of. He had never made a move on you – ever – but at this moment, he was glad. Because things would’ve been different, and you never would’ve ended up loitering at his shop, and you never would’ve been sitting so pretty on his bike, all these years later.

“I just …” He trailed off, words failing him, as he lifted a hand to skim it over your jawline. “You can tell me to stop.”

But you didn’t. You wouldn’t. Your eyes simply batted up at him, leaning into his touch when his fingers caressed your cheek. Your skin immediately flushed. You were so soft, and warm, and god, did his skin prickle when he touched you. 

“Can I tell you a secret?” He muttered, voice gravely. You nodded instantly, and his thumb went to trace the outline of your lips. “I had always been … jealous that Mikey got to you first.”

Had your feelings in high school been reciprocated and you didn’t even know it? You licked at the corners of your lips, your tongue quickly flicking his thumb in the process. “You were?” You asked, already feeling yourself getting wet from just him tracing your lips. “I … never really liked Mikey anyways.” You then shook your head. “It feels silly to talk about this so many years later –”

Draken turned your face back to his, looking into your eyes sternly. “You never liked Mikey,” he said, point blank, pressing his thumb onto your bottom lip.

Without hesitation, you wrapped your lips around his thumb, swirling your tongue around the fingertip. You shook your head at his question.

His breath hitched. Just the sight of your lips around his thumb had him adjusting himself in his pants. He could feel his cock start to swell with need, causing him to mumble a soft, “Fuck,” under his breath.

You weren’t just wet now. You were soaked.

You slipped your mouth off his thumb, leaving a tiny trail of spit. His face immediately got closer, his lips grazing yours. He could tell they were soft, and even your chapstick smelled like cherries. God, how could he be so hard already? “I liked you back when we were teenagers,” you confessed, reaching out to hook your thumbs in the belt loops on his coveralls. “I was too scared to say anything, and Mikey … he’d just been there. Right place at the right time. We really didn’t feel anything for each other.”

Your words stirred something within him, something more than jealousy. Was it regret? The fact that he could’ve had you, all those years ago, if he’d just manned up and asked. He could’ve fought people all day, but when it came to asking out the girl he liked, he’d sat back, let his best friend pop your cherry. It should’ve been him. Fuck, it could’ve been him. 

His lips pressed to yours instantly, needing to taste the sweetness on your lips. His tongue darted out, swiping at that cherry flavor, and he moaned. Actually moaned. Draken wasn’t known to be weak for anyone, but you … you had always been a different story. You pulled him in closer by his belt loops, tipping your face up as he leaned over you. His mouth devoured yours, his tongue slipping past your lips once again to explore your mouth. He gripped the edge of the seat, his other hand cradling your jaw, and you wanted him so much closer. If he just put his knee between your legs, you could –

There it was. He did it, placing his knee right in the perfect spot. You bucked your hips up, setting a slow grind against his knee as he kissed you with feverish intent. Moans fell from your lips and into the kiss, making the tent in his pants grow bigger every passing second. He was so fucking hard now, and he needed more of you. He would have more of you.

“No, stop,” he muttered, breaking the kiss and moving his knee away. You huffed with disappointment, wanting that delicious friction once again, but when you opened your eyes, he was staring at you with purpose. “Please, let me taste you.”

You nodded dumbly, eyes blown out with lust. All you could say was, “Okay.”

In another life, you would’ve said something endearing, or maybe even hit him with a little dirty talk. But you absolutely couldn’t right now. Your head was swimming, the image of him unzipping your jeans and taking them off felt like it was out of a fever dream. Is this what it felt like to drown? No, you were breathing – just about – and Draken was throwing your pants off to the side, kneeling before you. Your legs spread wide as you sat on the bike. Surely, there could’ve been a better place to do this, but the way he was staring at your soaked panties, pushing them to the side to take in your pussy … you knew there was no stopping him. This was just his first course of the night.

His tongue dove between your wet folds, drinking you in like a glass of lemonade on a hot summer’s day. You knew you were done for when his arms wrapped around your legs, holding them apart, giving himself better access to one thing he’d craved for years. He rolled his tongue over your swollen clit, enjoying the sounds that slipped out of your mouth. You muttered obscenities, bucked your hips without thinking, pulled on his slicked-back hair. Anything to give you more friction on your precious, aching clit.

He dragged his tongue down, pushing it inside your warmth, collecting the arousal and groaning like a man starved. Fucking his tongue into you, he angled his nose to brush your clit, and you just about mewled. You had spent so many years either having mediocre sex or stressing over this stupid job, when this – this man you had been in love with in school – was here the whole time, just dreaming about the day he could eat your pussy. So much time wasted, so many fake orgasms, while Ken Ryuguji owned your favorite auto shop, so close to you and right under your nose. 

You were pretty sure the seat on this bike had to have been ruined. Draken was turning you into a wet mess, making your hips buck against his face. His lips wrapped your beloved clit, sucking and pulling, needing more – so much more – of you. Slipping two fingers inside you, he pumped them fast. It didn’t take long for his fingers to curl and find that sweet spot that had your core trembling around him. He didn’t know what he’d do if you came on his face. Honestly, he’d probably cum in his pants on the spot.

“C’mon … c’mon … you can cum in my m–mouth –” He was practically begging, his voice muffled from deep within your thighs. “Tastes so, so good … fuck, Cherry, fuck –”

You couldn’t stop yourself, couldn’t even think about anything but the way his tongue lapped at your clit, before you were cumming on his tongue, your arousal smearing all over his lips. He moaned the second he got just a hint of your essence, burying his face more into your legs. You tasted better than candy, than cherries, than menthol cigarettes. He could spend forever between these thighs, drinking you in and listening to your desperate moans.

Once your body stopped shaking, he dragged his tongue one last time through your folds, making sure he didn’t miss a drop. You yelped from the overstimulation, and when you opened your eyes, he was rising from in between your legs. His licked at your slick still staining his lips, bringing your mouth to his again, letting you taste yourself. Your hands fisted into his shirt, downright desperate for more of him. As if reading your thoughts, he pulled back.

“I know it’s not ideal, given the place we’re in, but …” He cradled your face in both in his hands, as if you were just a baby bird. “Can I fuck you, Cherry?”

You nodded without hesitation, already drunk on his touch. You weren’t exactly sure how he planned on doing this. I mean … you two were in the dirty workshop area of an auto repair shop. This wasn’t exactly the best place to have sex. But then he was adjusting your position on the motorcycle, laying your head down by the handlebar and pulling your legs on both sides of the seat, your ass resting nicely in the curve. His hands were quick to roll off your panties.

“Ken,” you called out, sitting up a little and dragging your hand up. His white tank bunched up at the waist. “Wanna see more of you …”

Draken was so goddamn hard in his pants, his cock throbbing with the anticipation of being inside you, but you were just so pretty and he was putty in your hands. He let your palms explore him, lifting his tank top up so you could see what the fabric had been concealing. He’d really filled out since school – his arms were toned, his abdomen more defined. He looked like the statue of Apollo, all lean and muscled, but with just the right amount of grit. You liked that he never got his dragon tattoo removed (although, that would’ve been very painful), and that his piercings remained the same. Everything about him seemed untouched, but he’d just gotten better with age. Just the sight of him made your mouth water.

You leaned back down on the bike, bringing him down with you. Your lips pressed against his hungrily, and he was so, so tempted to slip his tongue into your mouth, when he felt his cock hard as a rock in his pants, aching and pulsating. His mouth broke away from yours, and he whispered, quite hopelessly, “I’m so sorry, but I really, really need to be inside you or my dick is going to explode.”

A chuckle escaped your lips, and just the sound of it made Draken smile. You nodded, urging him to continue, and he quickly unzipped the bottom half of his coveralls. He took his cock out: it was long, curved, pink at the tip, and leaking precum on the shop floor. All the more reason to be inside you; he couldn’t have his mechanics seeing that on the floor and wondering what he was doing after hours. He pulled a condom out from his wallet and slid the ribbed rubber on. Lifting both your legs onto his shoulders, your ass was almost rising off the seat and he positioned himself between your thighs, noticing the way your slick was smeared all over his seat. He grunted at the sight of it, slamming his cock into your without thinking.

You cried out, feeling him so deep so quickly. He held your legs up, leaning down as far as he could, and muttered, “Fuck, I’m sorry – so sorry – just … needed to be inside you. Needed to fuck you on my bike.”

You hand came up to cup his chin for a moment. “S’okay,” you promised, “just fuck me like you should’ve done years ago, Draken.”

He knew he told you to call him Ken, but just the nickname falling your lips in such a filthy manner had him groaning. Draken pulled out of you until only the tip remained, and then pounded his cock back inside you. You keened, trying to close your legs, but he held them up by his shoulders. He set a fast pace inside you, unable to keep his moans at bay, and slipped one hand off your leg to snake his fingers up your hoodie, pushing it up to your chin. Pulling your breasts out from your bra, his eyes clouded and played with your sensitive nipples. “So good,” he muttered, teeth sinking into his bottom lip for a moment. “Feels so, so good … needed you for so long, Cherry.”

“I know, I know, Draken,” you whimpered, locking your arms around his neck to bring his face closer to yours, your thighs now curling against your chest. Your back ached against the seat and your legs burned from the uncomfortable position, but you wouldn’t dare push him away, not when he was filling you like this. 

With his lips just grazing yours, he tugged on your lip, making you moan, and he fucked into you harder. Your nails were now dragging down his shoulders, leaving marks that he’d think about forever. “Fuck, I’m s’deep … so deep inside you. You’re so warm, so wet – fuck, I’m so close already.”

“Wait for me,” you begged, sighing as his cock curved against your sweet spot. “Wanna cum with you, Draken.”

“I know, Cherry,” he grunted, his pace relentless. Fuck, this was all he ever needed, all he wanted to do, forever. It felt like you were made to take him. “Touch yourself f’me. Cum together … we’ll cum together.”

You nodded quickly, moving your hand in between your bodies, finding your puffy clit so easily. A whine escaped your lips as you fingers rubbed little circles, getting you so close already. You just needed a little push. Draken was slamming into you, his breaths fanning your cheeks, and when he felt your legs start to shake, your walls clenching just a little, he almost died. “Such a good girl …” He cooed, nose brushing yours. “Touching yourself f’me so nicely … fuck, you take me so well … yes, yes, you’re so close. Just like that.”

Your fingers rubbed a little faster, and you knew your orgasm was imminent. With him pushing into you, filling you completely, and the stimulation on your clit … you felt your lips purse into an O-shape. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, Draken. I’m gonna … fuck, I’m gonna cum.”

“I know, I know,” he groaned. “Fuck – gonna cum too. That’s a good girl … doing so good – fuck –”

His release came first. He had been close for so long, Draken was surprised he’d been able to hold back. He came with a loud groan, spilling himself into the condom, and it was only seconds later that your jaw went slack with pleasure. His name fell from your lips in a whimper, and you kept rubbing that aching clit through your orgasm, going tight around his cock. He wouldn’t stop fucking into you, even when your orgasm subsided, needing to feel you clench around him for just a moment longer. The way he filled you wasn’t like any other. You never wanted to feel empty again. You couldn’t, not when you knew how Ken Ryuguji felt inside you.

When you both eventually stopped trembling, he gently placed your legs back down on the sides of the bike. They felt sore and limp, but that was the last thing on your mind. You opened your eyes at the same time, and you both couldn’t help but laugh at the position you were in, the absurdity of it all. The workshop smelled like gas and oil, and you were surrounded by broken-down cars. But you two had fucked like you were in a bedroom, on a soft mattress, rather than a motorcycle. You hand went over your mouth to suppress your giggles.

Draken smiled with you, and then removed your hand, liking the way you laughed. “I know it’s been a long time coming, but … can I take you out some night?”

You couldn’t stop smiling even if you tried. “I’d like that, Ken.”

His cock had gone soft, but he was still nestled inside you, basking in your warmth. Draken wished he could be inside you forever, with your fingers playing with his hair. He would give anything for this moment to last, but he knew this position on the bike had to be the most uncomfortable for you, and he needed to take off this condom. He chuckled under his breath.

“Also, in case you were wondering,” he said, lips pulling into a smirk. “You can loiter around my waiting room anytime.”

[hford0311]

Across the hall neighbor

Summary: Bucky is your across the hall neighbor, who you spend a lot of time with...when you're not on dates with other men. Bucky is always there to catch you when you fall and support you when you think you're on a high. Then, there was your current dating experience.

Pairings: fem!reader x oc; f!reader x bucky

Warnings: bruises, violence, mention of abuse, bucky and his vibranium arm cannot be messed with.

Word Count: 1.6k

***

Bucky listened closely - always did when he heard an unfamiliar voice in the building. A male's, flirtatious and smooth, he mentally noted and got up and peaked through his peephole. You were smiling up at the stranger as you stood in front of the door. "Thank you again," you breathed and grabbed your keys, toying with them. The male leaned down and kissed you. Bucky sighed and went back to his couch. It wasn't the first date that he watched end with you and most likely not the last. Did it make it any easier? No. No, it never did.

***

You and your neighbor were close, good friends. You ranted to him and had drinks with and the more rare grocery shopping. Nothing went beyond that, though, at least in real life. Bucky's fiction led to more but never let you know about it. Today was like most, the pair of you said hi and small talk when both of you left for work in the morning, eight to nine hours later, you found yourself planted on Bucky's couch with a drink in hand.

"I think he might be the one, Bucky." You smoothly and excitedly stated in your drunken form. He rolled his eyes and took another sip. "Yeah, okay." He stated with sarcasm. "I mean he-" he listened to your perfect date with now known man, Collin. It wasn't a new conversion. A rinse and repeat that happened every so many months. Bucky always took mental notes of the men you dated: what failed, what worked, how he turned you on or off, and other small details. Sometimes, after a breakup, when you'd end up with sobs on the couch, Bucky reminds you of any bad that the guy had and attempted to make you feel better. At the end of the however long a time period, you'd almost always end up on Bucky's couch, whether it was a great date or tragic ending.

Another two weeks went by, and Bucky noticed the quietness that filled his apartment more now. It had been a week, and he noticed your absence from his couch. He shrugged it off for a few nights before he started texting you about the newest and oddest leap of absence. Your replies filled with date details and how you needed to end the night at Collin's. When he did see you, the sleeves were all the way down to your palms, and you wore more pants than skirts or dresses. Had to be the seasons changing from fall to winter.

Then, a month. The morning small talk shortened, you were in a hurry every time. No more couch talks and drunken words thrown at each other either.

One Friday night, it drove him nuts too much. He missed you. He went to the door, glanced through the hole that showed your apartment door, and saw Collin towering over you. His mouth over your ear, hand gripping your wrist tightly. "I haven't, I promise. C'mon, let's get inside." You trying your best to speak calm, even though Bucky saw a bit of fear in your eyes. "Alright," your boyfriend grumbled, and you led him inside. More mental notes for Bucky.

Your ex-Soviet agent neighbor noticed how you came home less or even left earlier than normal over the past week. One day, he decided to do the same to catch up with you. As he locked his door, you came out. He smiled at you until he noticed the healing bruises that were exposed even under your tights. His next immediate thought was there were more under your sweater and jean jacket sleeves. "Haven't seen you lately, stranger," he jokingly chided. You quickly smiled him, "Yeah, just super busy lately with everything and anything." You replied, almost running out of breath how fast you said the words. "With, who, Chad--" "Collin...and partially, yes." You cut him off, beginning to go down the stairs. "Are you with Charlie tonight?" He quickly questioned, following you. "Collin, and no, Bucky."

"Come over tonight, we can catch up on that new show you've been begging me to watch with you." You internally cridged with guilt.

"I don't know, I'll think about it."

"We can order Chinese, the place with best rangoons." He sweetened. "On a diet, can't." You hurried out. Bucky stood defeated as you caught a cab out of the building. Never had you say no to rangoons. Nor making him watch a series, making him question what happened to humanity over the past 70 years. "Try again tomorrow," he mumbled to himself, walking towards the subway.

The following night, he woken from noises that were typically completely muffled to the point of silence for other neighbors, but not the one with super hearing. Yelling. The sounds of things being rumpled and thrown. A "get out" was yelled by you, and that's when he got out of bed, putting pants on before walking into the common hallway. He was just about to knock on your door when Collin walked out, glaring at Bucky. A second later, he saw a crying you by the door. "You ok? You wanna-" "I'm fine." You stated and shut the door before he could finish his sentence.

***

He knew he shouldn't. At the same time, he knew, he needed to. Bucky knocked on your door. His ears waiting to hear any response. Nada. One more set of knocks, two. Now there was shuffling around. "Y/n!" Bucky called with more raps. Bucky felt his heart rate quicken and his breathes deepen. Your door opened. "What do you want?" Collin stood, his body taking over the entry. Bucky had to resist the urge of punching the guy in the face. "I have some of Y/n's mail." He lied in a cold tone. "You couldn't just drop it off? Not making the hinges fall off the door?" Bucky's jaw tighten, so did his fists. "Next time." He briefly said, starring at the man that acted as if the apartment was his and not yours. "Well, where is it?"

"What?"

"Her mail."

"You know what, just tell her I have it and she can stop by to grab it when she can." Bucky started to walk back to his place. Collin rolled his eyes. "Just drop it off, she doesn't need to see you." His entire body clenched. "Listen buddy, I don't need to take this crap from you. Okay? Y/n can get her mail when you're not around." "Collin?" Your voice traveled to the hall. Collin sighed and shook his head, walking back in your apartment.

Two days later, a soft knock rapped on Bucky's apartment. He woke up to it. He raced to the door, opening to the point where he could've broken it. "Hi," he exhaled with a smile. "My mail?" You questioned, barely even making eye contact. Then, he noticed the dramatic eye make-up that was very much not your usual. "Um, yeah, about that," he pursed his lips. You sighed, "Bucky, don't ruin things over fake mail." That's when he saw it. A certain almost covered yellow greenish mark under your eyebrow. He softly touched your face, body acting before his words or maybe even part of his brain. You tried to hide your flinch. "I hit it on the counter. I was grabbing something on the floor and-" Bucky's hands moved to the end of your sleeve, pulled it up to your elbow. A combo of heeling and new bruises both the shape of finger tips and almost an entire hand. He was nearly shaking. "He can't do this to you." He growled.

The intercom from your apartment began ringing. "I have to-" You began to pull away from his soft grasp. "Is that him?" He began to stomp his way into the hall. "Bucky! Stop! He didn't mean it!" You called to him, following him down the stairs as if you could make him stop. "No! No, Y/n. Don't make excuses for him. He did mean it and no, he won't stop." His anger spewing. "Bucky, he's-" The words were no longer being heard. Collin was standing there in front of the glass locked door. Bucky pulled the door, letting it slam shut before you made it down there. A glove covered fist slammed into Collin's face, making him stumble a few steps back. More punches were exchanged, swinging arms, and you shouted at both of them to stop. "She doesn't," punch, "deserve," smack, "any of that!" Three more fist marks. "A real man" nose bleeding, "doesn't hit," a swift kick, "women!" A siren rang. Bucky took a step back Collin dusted himself off, wiped his bloody nose, and walked away. "She wasn't worth it anyways." Bucky nearly booked it, you grabbed his bicep. "Don't." You breathed.

That night, Bucky's apartment was finally filled with you again. Tears streaming down your cheeks as all the secrets of abuse were now coming out. Your makeup gone, bruised eye exposed, your arms wrapped around one of his couch pillows. Chinese on the coffee table. Bucky on the other end of the couch. After twenty minutes of this, Bucky scooted to the middle and wiped your tears. "You never deserved what he did. He didn't deserve you. One. Single. Bit." You leaned in and kissed him. His lips softly returning the action. The kiss broke and you looked into his eyes. "Give me what I deserve, James." He stroked your hair behind your ear and rested his forehead on yours. He leaned in more and sensually kissed you. "You deserve," lips connecting, "a man that," his lips trailed down, "will treat you like," back to the lips, "a queen." You hummed then giggled a little. "You can do that." He froze a little. You grabbed his chin, making him look up at you. "Bucky, you are that man."

[theloganator101]

The Great BNHA Review: We Live in a Society

The world of fiction! The place where everything in the story happens. So when you're worldbuilding there are many things to take into consideration to make the world of your story feel alive.

From the people that inhabits it, the cities, towns, villages, and locations the characters live in. And even having a set of rules to follow to avoid plot holes and help the world they live in make sense.

Much like how despite technology being more advanced compared to real life, yet still not being able to have flying cars or advanced robots. Those kind of things can sometimes break immersion in the story, and as a writer you would want to avoid that as much as possible.

HOWEVER! The world BNHA takes place in doesn't make a lick of sense when you think about it for more than thirty seconds, and the foundation of the world breaks the more you think about it.

Case in point, UA!

I think at this point we all can agree that UA wasn't an actual school and instead a glorified boot camp to train child soldiers to fight. And for a series called MY HERO ACADEMIA!! There's hardly any academia in it at all.

Apparently Hori didn't wanna bother with that part of the series and being forced to write "boring" scenes and just get back to the exciting battles. Like where're the scenes of the class studying for their latest tests? Where're the scenes of the kids doing their favorite activities? Where're the scenes of them bonding with their superiors?

WHERE'S THE FUCKING ACADEMIA PART OF THIS GOD FORSAKEN SERIES!?!?!

You can't just name it My Hero Academia and only give us 20% of what the show is called! It just feels like false advertising at this point!

Also about the whole child soldier thing? Yeah let's go deeper into that.

Why are we relying on TEENAGERS to fight in these big battles and save the world when they've only been in hero school for a single year? That's literally like forcing teenagers to discover a cure of a disease when they've only taken a year of biology class!

And yeah, I get it, it's an anime so it's expecting you to suspend your disbelief, and they already had experience with fighting villains before so it would make sense to recruit them. But again, these are fucking teenagers and we shouldn't be relying on them to fight battles the adults should be able to handle!

This is one of the biggest problems of having your story take place in a world similar to modern real life, because here adults actually gives a shit as to what children go through and knows it would be fucked up to send them to fight in war! And the excuse of it taking place in Japan and thus how they do things is different compared to most countries is NOT GOING TO CUT IT!

These grown ass adults should KNOW bringing kids to fight in a war is fucked up and should NOT be encouraged! But since they're so desperate they choose to get them involved! The only exception to this is Rock Lock since he already knows this!

Okay, let's step away from the whole child soldier thing and focus on something the story never gave us introspection of... the fact that we never got to see how quirkless people are really treated.

It's explained that 20% of the population is quirkless, so almost a quarter are born without it. And from what we saw of Izuku's life with it, discrimination must be a common thing in their society. So it would make sense to explore that since it's tied to the main character's backstory and how he's going to make things better for others like him.

... Except that's not how it goes.

We never get to see how the life of a quirkless person is like, we never get to canonically see Izuku interacting with someone like him with the only exception being Melissa. But the thing about her is that she grew up on an island and her father a respected scientist, so it's kind of difficult to tell how the quirkless life is like if this is the only example we get... and it's not a good one.

But wait! There is a canon major character that was also quirkless like Izuku! And it's Yuga Aoyama. And how did the story treated him?

Oh it was revealed real late into the story with no awareness and treated him like shit for being an unwilling traitor, then replace him with Shinsou who whined and complained his way into the Hero Course.

Uhh, what the fuck?

And the worst part about all this is that Izuku has no reaction or acknowledgement whatsoever! He doesn't sympathize or feel less alone, he doesn't comment or say anything about this! So it's like what's even the point!?

Oh don't worry, we'll come back to this whole Izuku not acknowledging his past later in the review! But there's one more thing I wanna talk about in this world.

Is how blatantly biased society is to the Heroics occupation.

From what we've seen and learned, people are not allowed to use their quirks in public. And that the only way would be able to legally use them is to have a provisional license... which is only obtained if you're training to be a hero.

Uhh, but what if you don't wanna go into heroics? What if there is a person who wants to be a comedian? A layer? A construction worker? What if they have quirks that they think would help them in their jobs? Would they get in trouble if they tried using their quirks on the job? Is the Provisional License exam the only way to be able to use your quirk freely? Is there another test people can take to get one if they don't want to go into heroics?

Yeah you see what I'm trying to say here?

Since Hori's so focused on getting to the next big battle that he barely thinks about the world BNHA takes place in and leaves holes in the process. The world of BNHA feels more like a dystopia where heroics is all that matters and that anything else is boring and not as interesting. And since the world itself is so flawed, that I don't feel immersed into it at all and all I have are these questions on how things are run.

So in the next part, we'll be taking a look into the themes and messages the story tries to tell it's readers... but oh boy, did it really fumble with it's messages.

[redhoodinternaldialectical]

Thoughts on Jason Todd’s choice of weaponry?

:D an ask! Yay!

Oooh, lets see, I'll start with the crowbars because I appear to be like one of three people on the entire planet who actually likes them.

They're a tacky as fuck riff on the fact that Jason's death is central to his character. They overemphasize the manner in which he died, muddy the waters about what part of his death is important to him, and strangely cheapens the manner in which he died through the parody feel of it.

No one seems to really disagree with my analysis here, but I happen to enjoy that about them and think it's very on brand for Jason. What can I say? They're fun!

Best Quality - His Wiggles

This ultra-sharp curved blade used to be his signature character design feature, the way the white streak in his hair is now, and I'm really not sure why it didn't stick!

Best weapon he's ever had, bring it back please!!!!!

The All-Blades

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm....

HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM...

I have mixed feelings about the All-Blades. Like much of Lobdell's work: phenomenal idea, poor execution. Giving the guy who is most known for being morally grey a set of powers that is exclusively based on moral absolutes sucks shit, I gotta be honest, and the trick he pulled on the blood blade was cool but ultimately does nothing to solve those problems.

HOWEVER

I want to love them so fucking badly. A set of glowy soul blades is a dope sicknasty off the chain concept and I wish the well wasn't poisoned with the moral implications and the restrictions to use them only on the "Untitled", a set of enemies that only exist for Jason so far as I can tell. If someone seriously took Jason down a magic based path that removed the DnD alignment chart bullshit, I would be so game to see them come back! Hell I wouldn't even insist on a better cooler design for them!

...though uh, yeah those are the least interesting magic sword designs I've ever seen tbh

Normal Ass Swords

They're alright I guess. Like, there's nothing in it really, but it's not bad?

Guns - Real Bullets

Excellent, evocative yet simple, straightforwards and to the point. It makes hella sense thematically to boot, love this for him, please give him back his pistols and miniguns and shit

Guns - Rubber Bullets

Hate. HATE. hate ick disgusting bad NO.

I just fucking hate rubber bullets, like, as a concept. I refuse to accept "non-lethal" bullets as a valid use of gun, either in real life or in fiction. Guns are for putting many holes in things very fast!!!! If you're gonna use a gun, fucking well own up to that!!! Do not play this silly ass game of pretending that you can change out the material and do the same things as with lead bullets but with the video game status effect of "non-lethal" applied. YOU ARE GIVING PEOPLE SMALL CIRCULAR BRUISES. This is still harmful, yes, ooph ouchie, but it is not even slightly a good use of a gun, you are wasting holster space, and carry weight, and the physical materials used to make it all!!

JUST USE A FUCKING STICK! YOU DON'T RUN OUT OF STICK AMMO!

My belief in his capacity to take out enemies is shattered the instant those fuckers are on panel. Maybe this ain't entirely rational, or realistic to how fights go with rubber bullets IRL, but I hate them so much on principle that I will ignore any counterargument you might have that they'd work. I will die on this hill. Rubber bullets BAD. Please stop making him use this!!

Bombs

Love it, give him more bombs forever

ka-BOOM!!!!

His Brain

This is actually his best weapon - sorry wiggly knife, you're being shunted down to number 2 on a last minute technicality! I think Jason is at his best when he's outsmarting people and making long term fucked up schemes to ruin people's lives.

He's so good at it! It's so fun to watch him do it!

Genuinely a shame that this facet of him was mostly lost after Flashpoint, though to give credit where it is due, in Rebirth Jason did ruin the Penguin's life in an impressively elaborate way, which I did really enjoy. I want to see him be a tactical deliberate menace to one person in specific again idk, that's part of why I do kinda agree that he works better as an antagonist than a protagonist - which it should be noted does not mean I think he works better as a villain necessarily, his ethics aren't what matter here - he's just had his best moments as the schemer, and it's hard to have a protagonist schemer even when you make them ethically the good guy.

I hope you enjoyed my nattering on about Jason's weapons :D thank ye again for ask!

[dtriad]

《早安！三国打工人》 Good Morning! Workers of the Three Kingdoms, written by 蒿里茫茫

here to shout into the void with a cnovel rec!

The world is boiling, the people are suffering. In truth, Lu Xuanyu didn't quite understand the meaning of those eight words. Ever since she had landed face down in the dirt of the sixth year of the Zhongping era, the fleeting dream she'd once held had scattered like ashes and vanished into thin air. She had a plain face, low EQ, no family background, and a baffling debuff that made everyone mislike her—but it didn't matter that she wasn't treated as the white moonlight of whatever duke or prince. She could work hand and foot, balance the books, butcher hogs, and even had a sword that was enough for her to walk alone in a chaotic world. Her goal was also very simple: a small house, some close friends and neighbors, a room full of food, and a courtyard where she could enjoy the cool breeze at night. So—in the end, just what had gone so wrong for her path to turn entirely in another direction? "I am ready to die here." She held the Black Blade, fully focused as she stood amid the flames, and looked arrogantly at the tide of Danyang soldiers pouring in. "If you want to seize Xuzhou, be ready to do the same."

I have a weakness for the sub-genre of cnovels that's about the main character transmigrating into a historical setting, preferably stories set in an actual historical dynasty (tagged 古色古香) instead of an invented historical setup (tagged 架空历史) or in-universe fictional storyline. And even more specifically, the kind that deals in infrastructure building or military conflict. Conveniently, JJWXC has tags for specific periods, e.g. Qin, Han, Tang, Song, Ming, and Qing dynasties—and of course the Three Kingdoms period, which is how I came across 早安！三国打工人 aka Good Morning! Workers of the Three Kingdoms while on a historical transmigration reading spree, and consequently fell down a very, very, very deep hole orz

Among the stories that I’ve read in this sub-genre, 3K Workers really stands out to me as one of the best (imo!). The MC Lu Xuanyu doesn’t transmigrate into someone native to the Three Kingdoms period, but as her own DnD character with high combat and terribly low charm per the debuff from the summary. 😂 There is no System, only her sentient sword—the Black Blade—that may be as much of a hidden existential poison to her as it is her one “friend” in the beginning. Slowly, she makes an ordinary life for herself in the capital city of Luoyang, with sufficient food and necessities, a decent-paying job, friendly and nosy neighbors, a small home of her own… But none of it can last, because these are the deathbed years of the Eastern Han dynasty according to history—and the people are suffering.

Over the course of more than a decade, from a lone hunter to a butcher, from a handyman to a refugee, from a night watchman to a general—who’s responsible for the lives of many thousands, both soldiers and civilians (the line blurring as ever between them)—Lu Xuanyu never forgets why she decided to step up and fight: to save people. And her struggles in the attempt, both internal and external, comprise the propelling force of the story, as we can see from the author's notes in which they say up front that Lu Xuanyu will join Liu Bei’s team, and then add:

The heroine is an idealist unto death; don’t think about using reality to change her.

(no way!!!! I love her as she is.)

Some things I really like in 3K Workers:

Lu Xuanyu starts out as a true no-name, rather than someone with an established and/or influential family background (b/c lbr that is quite common for this sub-genre). When she appears through an outsider's POV in Ch. 1, she’s been living alone in the wilderness for several months and is a little desperate for some kind of positive human interaction (the low charm debuff does her no favors, which makes the instances people overcome it more notable—it either says something about the impact her behavior has on them, or their ability to disregard inexplicable annoyance). She doesn’t have power or influence to leverage; she doesn’t have the ambition to do something great or world-changing. She simply wants to live a normal life. It’s just unfortunate that “normal” in the 3K period easily leads to death. Her abilities make her abnormal—she is, quite literally, something like an android according to Word of God, a superhuman who’s a wrinkle in the fabric of this timeline’s reality—but she feels and thinks as a 21st century human, with the assumption of a common humanity that makes her a fish out of water.

There's a strong focus on the consequences of war for the common people, and the PTSD that is a simple fact of existence for those exposed to the conflicts; it consistently turns its lens back to look at the farmers, the soldiers, the people who are treated like trampled grass, and shares their perspectives as well. I recall seeing this done in a few other novels, but iirc the framing in those cases was set up more as a way to show people reacting to the changes wrought by the MC, whereas here the framing allows the MC to better understand the attitudes & status quo of the period.

A lot of stories in the sub-genre have the MCs quickly adjusting to the past on the outside and leveraging the power of their position (again, typically based on preexisting family clout) to proactively push for changes, whether it’s to protect themselves or drive swift societal/technological change. In contrast, Lu Xuanyu doesn’t ever truly adapt to the values of the past, is clearly an oddball to others in her behavior and actions, and has enough on her hands with battles without any time or attention to initiate some golden-finger-boosted upheaval of norms. But the ripple effect of her existence is such that other characters, native to the period, are the ones who see clearly what changes they can make and want to make, and pursue those goals of their own accord: reducing the power of the aristocratic families, sharing knowledge more widely, establishing a strong foundation to support better opportunities for women… They come self-motivated to their own enlightenment, which I feel really enriches the story—Lu Xuanyu is the match that lit the fire, but they keep the fire burning. A special shout-out to Lu Bai, who proposes and leads the women-only Jianfu Battalion; her character has some fantastic development throughout the book ♥

I consider this novel very anti-war in attitude—even though we want Lu Xuanyu to win her battles, by the end there’s only bitter weariness rather than delight in victory.

It’s the Three Kingdoms period, so if you like loyalty kink then this naturally caters 300% to that!!!

Ft. great content about battle strategy, tactics, and logistics that makes my inner history geek super happy, and it's combined very effectively with character portrayal and development shown via battle; outside of battle, it gives attention to rebuilding during the rare periods of temporary peace in a historically grounded way.

Plus the tension in the (im)balance of power—there’s the imperial court, the various warlords, appointed officials, aristocratic families—and how the norms of society slowly, slowly start to change...

Despite the subject matter, it is also incredibly funny 😆 Lu Xuanyu's 21st-century-shaped outlook does not jive with period attitudes, and the resulting disconnects in communication are hilarious if you enjoy dry humor; the low EQ squad, ft. founding members Lu Xuanyu and Lü Bu lololol, are an absolute riot, whether they’re interacting with each other or anyone else, and outside their low EQ sphere of immediate influence the story doesn’t shortchange readers on everyday absurdities either, whether it’s the internal squabbling within Yuan Shao’s harem of strategists/advisors or the 3K period take on “lying flat” among certain scholars (paging Zhuge Liang’s uncle…)

The events and historical characters are based on actual historical records rather than fictionalized Romance of the Three Kingdoms, but you don’t have to be knowledgeable about 3K history at all! Lu Xuanyu certainly isn’t! (And if you are, you’ll enjoy all the references to 3K memes & whatnot… actual lol at the “burning of the thatched cottage” in 3K Workers @ 2010 Three Kingdoms drama do you see that!!! do you see what proper plot logic is!!!)

Technically it falls under JJWXC’s m/f category, but I consider this story essentially gen with background UST at most. Lu Xuanyu is very shippable, in the sense that she has lots of interesting relationships with characters in roles ranging from loyal subordinates to tsundere colleagues to ideologically opposed enemies. (And I was pretty satisfied with the endgame ship, though it really isn’t the focus at all during the main story.) She passes as a man for the first ~20% of the cnovel before revealing she’s a woman, and while the f/f potential is limited (alas!), I do love the supporting female characters.

The bad news: … it’s long… and untranslated… /cries/ I want to translate some excerpts as I reread it, but I gotta be realistic—despite my love for this cnovel I just can’t sign myself up rn to translate 2.7 million Chinese characters over 700+ chapters. If you can read Chinese or if you’re ok with reading via mtl, then you can find it at:

JJWXC [how-to guide]

or alternately here, Ch. 1-601 (Parts 1-5) and Ch. 602-757 (Part 6+extras)

Additional links (potential spoilers)—

Reviews on Weibo & Lofter (one) (two) (three)

Review - Peking University Online Literature 2022-23 Biennial List

Interview with the author 蒿里茫茫

Meta re: Lü Bu

Maps of Luoyang; army movements in the years 193, 195, & 199 CE (+zoom in on Puyang); Emperor Xian's journey 195-199 CE

Translated excerpts—

Ch. 13: LXY defending the neighborhood

Ch. 23: Mei-niang invites LXY over

Ch. 66/73: "you cannot retreat, you cannot lose, and you cannot die!"

Ch. 99: funerals for the dead

Ch. 210: Lü Bu's innate taunt skill

There is also an audiobook adaption in progress!!!

[connectionterminated13]

Arcade machines/ Costumes

Talbert files fan fiction yes I have sunk into that low oh friends... Specifically this is for the #7nightsoffrightsprompts Thing hosted by @driftingvoid-155 . And before we get into it warnings. I missed any tell me in the comments below

tw, Body horror, mentions of murder, mentions of blood, mental illness, Cigars, Talbert being Talbert.

It was the noise Michael hated most. No it wasn't the noise of the others or the noise of the man blabbering about whatever smart thing he had thought he had come up with and that stupid little room no it was the arcade machines. Every time he found himself crawling through one of those vents it made his head pound and scream.

The noise of those stupid children seemed to shake the building. All the sounds made Michael want to do nothing more than curl up with Fredbear and cry. But then if he did so, Fredbear would yell at him and call him all kinds of names like a stupid bleeding coward until he had to crawl through these dastardly vents once again. God in heaven why couldn't he just roll over and die already. For he was nearly sure that when he did die and walk through the gates of hell the devil would weep at challenge he presented, for there was no greater torture than the screaming, metal, cramped tube he was now wandering through.

He was lost in these thoughts when he bumped into the Great. He let out a sort of strangled yell and shrunk back slightly looking closer at the thing that had hurt his head. It was a vent grate opening up onto the arcade floor. He could see the kids there so many of them yelling and screaming and playing their loud machines and wearing their costume. 

Gosh it was Halloween and somehow he had forgotten! Halloween had been his favorite time of the year as a child, as a human and now Halloween was one of the few times in his miserable excuse for a life that he could be among the people. Every other year Halloween had been something Michael had counted down to in his head. Every other year he had spent what little money he could steal from the bodies of his victims on a costume. Every year he had just done things like sat on benches and walked into stores and been unnoticed...

It was the one time of year where someone like him could be a man and not some kind of horrible disgusting Beast that was better to be ignored or shot. Oh That's what they thought of him the children running and screaming, yelling at each other about nothing in particular or at least that's what fredbear said. Michael continued to crawl through the vents looking for another way. Way to what he wasn't sure. possibly out this time…

Wouldn't it be grand to get out of these interlocking holes of nothingness out, of the cacophony of screaming children and the sounds so distant yet so close of that stupid God damn man that had lured him here.

Michael had found out almost 2 days after arriving that the man's name was Talbert. He was of average height and slightly overweight with brown red curly hair and obnoxious sideburns. He had an even more obnoxious Irish accent to match and seemed to think that he was the best thing to have ever existed. But no he wasn't anything! at least that's what fredbear said. 

Michael stopped ahead of him, was the other one. The tangle of wires and dried blood and screaming children that had so long ago ruined his life in every conceivable way. If he was a good man, like the heroes and those children's games he would have fought the thing. He would have killed it but he was not so..

He waved at it. 

Wave back before slithering down a different vent to their right. 

Fredbear said this was a good thing to do. Michael agreed. 

Fredbear had started talking shortly after the horrible wire thing had buried its way in and out of Michael's chest. Specifically Fredbear had started talking after Michael had ran home After nearly 3 days of running about the woods. He had collapsed on the ground and cried his horrid hideous black tears and begged in his breaking voice for someone to come and help him. 

Fredbear had come like an angel from heaven. And told him to start “making friends”. 

Michael had it first objected, he had swore and screamed and begged for fredbear to stop yelling at him to make friends until eventually he had given up. 

After all as Fredbear said he was no longer a person no man living or dead would ever look upon a wretch like him and take pity on it. What was even the point of trying to hold himself above men like his father if he was no longer a “son” in the first place. Was it not better to slip his mind Into Darkness and lose himself in the taste of blood and the joy of death. 

And yes sometimes it was sometimes fun, But most of the time it was utterly miserable. He'd give anything to be a kid again or not even a kid, Just a human again. What Michael would trade for just one single token even if the noise made his head split for a moment to just be Michael again really truly Michael.

But Fredbear told him to claw on and continue his crawl. 

So he did… And yes he did try to look for some way out but it was impossible. This place was like some kind of horrible awful maze meant to trap him in particular. Every time Michael thought he was coming close to a real way out he would bump into that room again with the screaming children and he knew if he got in there. Well, he would not be treated with kindness even on or at least close to one of the few times of the year where he could exist out in the sight of man.

If he fell out of the vent their fathers would gang up and beat him to death probably or at least that's what fredbear said and Fredbear was always right about this sort of thing.

So he continued his crawl and continued his thought. 

Halloween used to mean a lot to him.  Halloween used to mean times with his father and brothers And their family friend's daughter Cassidy. How he had missed all that when they had all slowly started to die off and then how he had grown up into a man, And Halloween's meant time with friends. He had so many friends.

But if he Remembered the names of his friends he would cry and Fredbear would yell at him again because of what those friends would think of him now. Oh he was not the hero of the story he was the villain the thing to be slain in those arcade games. But Halloween was the one time of year where he could put on a costume and not be that. He was just a regular old zombie or a zombie pirate or a zombie astronaut. He was someone in a costume!

No this year Talbert had called. Dirty evil Talbert who in his Everlasting cruelty had dragged Michael to run around this stupid maze like some kind of rat! Probably for his own sick enjoyment! Because that's what everyone thought of Michael! For either they're sick enjoyment or they're Terror wasn't it!?

At least that's what fredbear said and fredbear had to be right. Oh the things he do to Talbert when he got him he would rip the man limb from limb and Stitch the ugliest plushie he could from the man's innards then, he would throw the plushie off of bridge! He made a horrid strangled giggling noise at the thought of it. 

-

Christopher Talbert lit up another cigar. And chuckled to himself this was the most fun he had had in years. Halloween after all had been quite boring since the death of his daughter. 

After her unfortunate passing Halloween had turned into monotony with the interruption of the posts and His science experiments. Halloween was always the best time to post the misinformation he was fed. After all, people loved stories of missing children and men looking into ghosts around Halloween.. Also he could dress up which was fun. This year he was like last year Frankenstein!

Not the monster mind you, he was the doctor. After all he was human and the only monsters here were the ones crawling in the vents. He could hear them clumping about letting out the occasional inhuman scream or plead in a child's voice but he wouldn't listen.

They were animals, nothing more and nothing less it was his job to watch them and the job paid handsomely.

He let out cigar smoke into one of the vents. He was probably saving people after all by watching these things climb around since this was the one time of year they could almost blend in.

Oh this would be a year to remember. Emmett, foolish old Emmett had tried to trick him you see, thinking that Talbert wasn't aware of this little act he was putting on.

And that was the double entender to the costume you see! For well Emmett thought himself the Creator the Frankenstein of this event if you will, Talbert was the man really in control! or at least that's what he told himself because of course he had never actually read Frankenstein and had just made up the extra details about his costume to sound smart.

Honestly Talbert was very proud of himself for coming up with the costume idea in the first place. Even though it was probably the second most obvious thing a person would pick for Talbert as a Halloween costume.

He continued to sit and smile to himself not doing any work until he heard one of them crawl too close..

It was Michael or that was its former name. Local Legends called the thing the Stitch Wraith. Talbert had found quickly that calling it this made it quite mad. 

So Talbert swiveled to face the thing and smile, his most cruel smile. No, it was hard to keep on his face since the thing was so Goddamn ugly. Its skin hanging off its remaining bones loosely and it wore a large dirty overcoat and hoodie in a vain attempt to hide that ugliness. Also carried around a little fredbear plushie that honestly Talbert felt quite bad for.

“Hello there Stitch Wraith. I think it's a bit too early to be trick or treating don't you?” Before the thing could even let out an angry growl Talbert hit his hand down on the controlled shock button and the vent lit up with a static crackle making the thing squeal and slink back quickly.

Talbert smirked for the 100th time, Right before the thing disappeared from view.. 

“Have you no shame man? I suggest you at least try to put on some kind of costume. I mean no self-respecting man would give you anything dressed like that!” Talbert Yelled after the thing before breaking into laughter at his own joke.

[skloomdumpster]

I keep trying to work out why Silva went to such lengths to build up this hyper-idealised image of Andreas in Sky's mind and I keep coming up short. I mean, okay, he probably wanted Sky to have decent male role models (and Silva felt guilty about killing Andreas) but Sky already had one of those in Silva. Silva was all the things he claimed Andreas was. Which makes what he did even more baffling.

I feel bad for Sky too - imagine being told growing up every five minutes what a great, noble warrior your dad is and then the real thing shows up - and he's basically an overgrown high school bully - Silva didn't just lie about how Andreas died, he lied about his entire personality. In Sky's shoes, I'd be pissed too.

I wondered once or twice even if Rosalind had Andreas under mind control - not regularly, but often enough that she'd done permanent damage to his mind in some way. Or maybe he'd been hit on the head one time too many. Beatrix was a better strategist than he was - and less easily manipulated - and she was 16.

Of course, Andreas may have just been Like That™ to begin with.

I cannot put in enough words how much fun this ask was to get!! CACKLING at the Andreas' comments.

Alright so I thought at length about the Silva conundrum, I remember thinking the same, literally why are you making up this saint about a bully? Why are you generating distance between you and the son you raised? The boy who wants to be your son?

And the it dawned on me that the goal is exactly that.

I think Silva felt incredibly guilty over Sky and that this enormous sensation of duty and guilt has been his north for longer than anything else has. Silva is a man who describes his father's attack to a Burned One and the fact he took upon his young (10 years old!!) shoulders the burden to give his father a mercy kill. It's Duty Duty Duty.

And I think it's important we differentiate duty from obedience. Andreas is obedient. Andreas hears orders and ignores his own criticism of them, he follows trough no matter what. Silva is dutiful. He has morals and a strict honor code and he'll sometimes fuck himself up over these, he'll get tunnel vision when he has 1 goal in mind (cough "your duty is to Alfea!" said to Sky about spying on Bloom)

All this just to say, I think Silva didn't see himself as a good role to Sky not even for a second. Not when he was a drunk and had a baby he didn't even really want, not when he was sober and had to deal with the fact he had taken a father from this kid - had murdered Andreas, and certainly not when Sky started asking questions and he wanted to give a good answer so he projects some of his traits, some of his own father's traits into a fictional Andreas and only digs the hole deeper. By doing what he thinks is right: killing Andreas, taking Sky under his wing, lying to Sky so he can have a good role model, Saul only makes himself less and less of a good guy in his own eyes and so he NEEDS to push himself from Sky and well... Rinse repeat.

A vicious cycle you cannot be free from unless you're willing to go through dismantling all of it. I wonder if a small part of Saul felt soul crushing relief when Andreas came back and ruined everything. Yes, he revealed Saul was a liar in more ways than one, he showed Saul was a murderer... But also he showed Sky he was not the Andreas from the stories. Which certainly hurt like hell to Sky, but must've felt a little good from Saul's perspective, since he was painting an Andreas who could easily step in and take his son and that simply wasn't reality.

I'm probably rambling, sorry!!

Now, about Andreas, I AGREE SO MUCH. Honestly, about Andreas AND Saul! Strategic my ass, these two are terrible. But I do think Saul has a much clearer head during combat, he can explore his team's strengths and the enemies weaknesses, where Andreas is brute force.

Which, sure, is pretty bad when we look at it head on, but it's not something without its place in a war. Rosalind promoted him for a reason and I can see it, when you're a bloody war where there's no place for hesitation, no place for mercy and obedience is all your commander asks from, Andreas is the perfect soldier. He's a man who'll push through whatever is front of him with sheer brute force and that's what the Burned Ones called for most of the time in the battle field, someone relentless and blood thirsty. In the long run? Not so much!

I think it shows how Andreas is as a character: pragmatic, brute, loyal - that he doesn't question Rosalind's orders and fucks up his relationship with Bea by doing this. Why did he lie about what happened in Aster Dell? Anyone with a brain would understand he'd have a better luck twisting what Aster Dell stood for (a corrupt place) than twisting his role in its destruction. Yet he does that!! He's not a very bright man and that's alright, being smarter than he was would've probably gotten him murdered sooner tbh.

[dean-winchester-is-a-warrior]

Hey there, lovely! 💜

Re: the ask game, I would love to know #13, #17, and #47 if you're willing to share. 😘

Thank you so much for these! They're fabulous questions!

13. Talk about a writing experience that has pleasantly surprised you.

This is really a hard ask for me, since I feel like I mostly hang on to the negative experiences, the times I just couldn't make an idea work, or when I struggled to get something out, but was really unhappy with it.

But a pleasant surprise...? 🤔

I'll give a very broad answer and say it was a pleasant surprise when I actually started writing fan fiction. I'd only ever written original works and characters, so I wasn't sure how it would feel to write other people's characters.

But the first fan fiction I ever wrote was for the show, Suits. And it was only because the writers were "will they/won't they" cock-blocking my favourite couple on the show, Donna and Harvey, for WAY too long. So, I got fed up and decided to give them the happy ending I felt they deserved.

So, I wrote a few fics in that fandom, and found that I actually really loved the process of writing for created characters. It was a very different experience because rather than defining your main characters from scratch, you had to try and find and replicate the voice they already had. I loved it, both as a writer and as a fan of the show, because it meant I had to really dive into the characters and try to understand them on a deeper level.

It was definitely a pleasant surprise how much I enjoyed it. Then I met Dean Winchester and the rest is history. 😄

17. What is your favorite line you've ever written?

That's hard too! Half of me thinks every line I've written is kinda trash and the other half has beautiful line babies that I'm so proud of. 😄

Here are a couple, as well as some context.

He leaned into your ear and growled deep and low. "Then give me what's mine."

Probably my favourite smutty line is from the One Shot, It's All for You

Context:

Y/N is trying to spoil Dean a little, take care of him for a change. But Dean wants to pleasure her too. So when she says, he should be the one being taken care of, this is his response:

Dean nodded. "I see." He rolled your nipple between his strong thumb and forefinger causing you to gasp.

"Was that gasp for me?" he asked, his deep voice causing your inner muscles to clench around nothing.

"I...yes, I mean..." You were back to nonsensical sentences.

He trailed the callused pads of his fingers down between your breasts and over your belly before he slid one finger through your slick folds.

"And this..." He brought his finger up to his mouth and sucked your juices from the tip. "Isn't this for me?"

You were panting as you answered. "Yes, god, Dean. It's all for you."

He slipped two fingers deep inside you and you whimpered.

He leaned into your ear and growled deep and low. "Then give me what's mine."

I mostly enjoyed the reaction this line got. People seemed to really enjoy it. 😄😁

Then my favourite angsty line is probably this one:

The story is set some time in S15, after they've found out what chuck wants as the ending to his story. Dean and Y/N get in a fight because he's, of course, stubbornly pushing her away for many reasons. These lines come out of that head space.

From the Drabble, When the Stars Love You

Context:

Even though you knew his heart - had connected it to your own with delicate stitches - his anger and desperate need to shove you away from him with both hands, often pulled the stitching loose, left your heart frayed and in danger of unraveling.

Sometimes you wanted to take scissors to them and cut him away from you for good, try to sew up the parts of you where he left holes. 

I love Dean with my whole heart and soul, but I imagine loving him would be very difficult sometimes. 😞

47. What story are you most proud of?

Great question, but tricky. 😄

But I think the one I'm proudest of is probably Green is My Favorite Color.

But, it doesn't get nearly as much attention as other series because it's a pairing with an OFC named Julie. But I absolutely loved writing and creating Julie too, so, it was a lot of fun.

It was the first series I ever finished (that was longer than 2 or 3 chapters) and I think that it shows my absolute love for Dean the best.

Because it follows his canon story relatively close (definitely made big changes too though, of course) it also feels like the most "realistic" Dean I've ever written. I was able to give him things I thought he deserved, and really live in those moments of pain with him. If that makes any sense. Lol!

Anyway, thank you so much for all your fabulous questions and I'm sorry I answered with a novel. 😄😄

[gojosbf]

I started following you after 236 because your emotions and posts echoed my sentiments. I love your posts. They make me laugh, they make cry. But most importantly they make me feel like I am not insane to feel this way for something fictional.

I hate the fact that bringing any criticism towards Gege’s writing results in being called a Gojotard. You can like the entirety of something and still criticise certain aspects of it.

I am not condoning all the threats and hate directed towards Gege but fans are allowed to be mad at the direction this story is going. Yes it is Gege’s world but we can have complains about it. That doesn’t make us fake fans. That just shows how much we’ve loved what he has created and how it affects us when it is taken away.

I feel many fans are tiptoeing around it because there are two extremities now in the JJk fandom. One - that will defend anything Gege produces and the other who is so done with characters being killed off and not adding anything to the plot. Both these sides are equally loud and thus polarising this fandom. People were on the edge after how Yuki’s fight with Kenjaku was handled and I think 236 was the final blow that divided the fandom.

I came across one post yesterday where it highlights the huge power difference between good guys and the bad guys with just Sukuna’s power alone. This is minus all the power Sukuna gave up (we don’t know if he got them back after).

It contains spoilers for 237 - https://www.tumblr.com/sleep-deprivedracoon/729649802609082368/jjk-manga-leaks-heavy-spoilers-ahead-please-do

To me, it feels like Gege has written himself into a corner indeed with shattering the ceiling (Gojo’s power was considered the ceiling in JJK power scaling) with Sukuna’s abilities.

What do you think?

i am trying to piece all my thoughts together in this so pls don't mind if it gets too long or loses track a bit.

first of all thank you and we are in this together i feel you I am still trying to wrap my head around the recent leak, until and unless we have proper leaks i will remain in denial about megumi also it's so sad to see how after the massive shock and reaction we got last week we've just given up this week it has become a thing where we are just hoping gege doesn't kill another of our favs and atp this trick is getting too overused to be appreciated (also the reason why as you mentioned we have two extremist side of fandom). i get it. gojo's death and sealing got jjk trending yet again, publicity even if negative publicity is still garnering the intrigue of many more people, not to ignore we have equal amounts of, if not more gojo haters because he was too strong.

now coming back to the story line, yes we are allowed to criticize when there are obvious plot holes and it serves for no purpose other than shock factor. Gojo's death was massively poorly written because all this time gege kept implying that even if sukuna had all his fingers gojo was the strongest (which is why he had to use mahoraga) his plot was gojo and sukuna are AT par with each other which is why this was a big deal and why he had to be sealed so kenjaku could follow through his plans and when sukuna regained his powers gojo wouldn't be a hindrance. now compare that to 236, it says sukuna actually wasn't going all out and NOW sukuna is to reveal his true form. really? really?? when the strongest character you've ever created does not stand a chance against this demon we're supposed to believe that the rest can? his students who are yet to unleash their full strength, the only special grade is supposed to? i mean we can still hope on yuuta because he has rika, the queen of curses and sukuna being the king of curses (love kashimo but as they said he's probably not surviving) but that doesn't seem much of a hope (as much i wish it was).

now coming back to the topic of when was the last time the good guys had a proper win since shibuya? do we really remember it?? (ofc apart from maki and unsealing) the bad guys are still standing strong, we have yet to see atleast one of main villains to fall and when is this going to happen??? it's been over 2 years now just how long are we supposed to keep digesting as "not so shonen" writing? (even mahito's death was just kenjaku absorbing him). i mean yeah it keeps us on edge but you as the author have the responsibility to keep the readers addicted and going and by the looks of it the og fans are dropping it one by one, is it really worth it? is it gege?

ofc course i don't condone the death threats but cmon a frustrated reader watching their favourite characters losing all the time is allowed to express themselves, maybe gege has a plan to turn this around but right now people are allowed to be angry and pissed and confused and frustrated, it's only natural, they cannot just expect people to see evil winning all the time and be alright about it now can they? these people calling others a "gojotard" are here for fun and they understood the premise of the mcs always losing so they root for the overpowered villains and hence enjoy the manga and move along what they fail to understand is that some of us are not capable of switching sides, we are still rooting for trios, the initial sorcerers whom we got attached to and we are tired of seeing them constantly unhappy. you're allowed to complain!! criticism is valid!!!!

and i seriously hope gege has some trick up his sleeves or he's ready to lose a good chunk of his loyal fans because this isn't looking good. we wasted last six months for nothing really, unsealing gojo did not help with anything except a 13 chapter long fight. and the outcome? back to square one!!!! so what was the point of the whole unsealing arc and shinjuku fight? not to mention the lukewarm reaction to his death portrayal and barely a passable explanation. sukuna is very oped currently but i have two bets against him, angel and yuuta (remember when sukuna thought angel was a pain and he wanted to kill them because he thought they could get in way).

i agree with t user sleepdeprivedracoon hakari has to win, there's no way gege is planning to kill him because then the manga is done for and i do not care what others say we are allowed to grieve, complain and make memes and jokes out of this hopeless situation we are currently in because that's literally how this manga is going so others who are so aggressively defending gege need to understand the criticism is valid and these reactions are valid and they need to get off their high horse. the not so shounen excuse is really not that convincing and we are allowed to be frustrated and angry it's a natural human reaction damn it. till then keep reading and remember life gets better but jjk doesn't (surpise us this halloween gege pls)

[cinderella-ish]

(heads up, this post mentions death and suicide)

I started writing Bloom Within Us about 8 or 9 months ago, almost a year after losing a grandparent, as one way to deal with my grief from that loss. I hadn't written any fiction at all since high school, and I'd never written a story of more than ten pages (double-spaced), so it was very much a surprise to me that, despite being only about 2/3 complete, Bloom Within Us sits at over 220k words and nearly 600 pages. Writing it has led me down a rabbit hole, learning about the craft of fiction writing, and I'm so touched to hear it's resonated with readers. When I started, I truly thought I'd be lucky to get even one reader.

Though Bloom Within Us is based on a tragic premise (what if Tohru died after falling from the cliff?), it's meant to be a hopeful story. Kyo has faced traumatic loss after traumatic loss; would he really be able to survive losing Tohru after he told her about her mother?

I think the answer is maybe. He'd be devastated, for sure, and I don't think he'd be okay for a long while. However, even though it would be incredibly painful, this would be the first time in his life where he'd be mourning as part of a community. He'd have people there to support him, to grieve alongside him, and to tell him it's not his fault.

Kazuma was all but a stranger when Kyo's mother died, and he never knew what caused Kyo to lose all hope when Kyoko died. Kyo had no one who really understood, though Kazuma certainly tried, and probably saved Kyo's life in both instances.

But I imagine, if Kyo were able to mourn Tohru properly, alongside his cousins and friends and adoptive father, he might be okay one day. Maybe there's a way (or multiple ways) things could align that would allow him to move forward, and that's the path I've tried to take in my story.

In a lot of ways, writing about dark or tragic subjects is my way of trying to find (or create) hope. Things can feel unbearable, but they won't always feel that way. And while they do, you don't have to feel that way by yourself. There's always someone who can understand at least some of what you're experiencing.

For Kyo, whose arc really revolved around him choosing to live (both figuratively and literally), I think it would be really powerful to see that even after losing Tohru, he could one day be okay, and maybe even have a life he loves.

So, in many ways, I hope Bloom Within Us comes across as having an anti-su*cide message. That is my intent, along with the other ideas I'm trying to explore, such as the universal nature of loss, or the importance of having community during challenging times.

When I learned that a younger cousin of mine ended their life this weekend, it brought up a lot of feelings. I wasn't particularly close with this cousin. I wasn't "not close," either; they just tended to keep a distance, and I was anxious that I'd come on too strong, so I let them remain at a distance.

Hearing now about the things that felt insurmountable to my cousin, I wish we'd been able to connect. They'd felt insurmountable to me, too, at that age, but I made it through to the other side. And I know so many people who went through a crisis in their late 20s only to emerge from that crisis with a better understanding of themselves, and a life they actually want. Life can and does get better, for so many of us. I think it would've gotten better for my cousin, too, if they were still here. I wish they'd been able to hang on at least until they could see that, too.

I don't know yet if I'll need a break from writing, especially writing a story that deals with grief and suicide. I don't know if I'll need a break from fandom or social media. Right now, I've been going about everything more or less as usual, and that's been working for me, but that could change. I am okay, and I know I'll be okay, even though I'll be sad for a while. I have a good support network and I'm in a good place despite everything. If I disappear for a bit, it's because I'm relying on my IRL support network. ❤️

[sapphire-weapon]

what are your thoughts on the horniness and thirst around leon since the remake came out? and all of the content that comes with it (reader inserts, actual animated p0rn etc)? i saw some teens complaining that it was weird and 'ruining the fandom' - but i didn't really think anything of it since, yk, fandoms are gonna fandom, it is what it is (and it's leon so, it's not surprising).

i remember you mentioning that back in 2005, it was very hard for RE fans to talk abt leon outside of his relationship to ada, so i was also wondering how the fandom dealt with general leon-induced horniness back in the day

oh, this might be my favorite ask I've gotten in a while.

/gleefully rubs hands together

First off, teenagers need to shut the fuck up about the fandom. There used to be a time when you'd go into the Resident Evil tag here on Tumblr and you'd get a bunch of weird model viewer porn of Chris banging Dante or someshit. Early RE fandom was filled with a bunch of zombie-on-Jill (and later, Claire) porn. Sometimes it was even zombie dog porn. I don't wanna hear shit about anything porn-related from some fuckin kids who don't know just how depraved this fandom has been. This fandom was built on fucked up porn.

So, in a similar vein, that Leon thirst has always been there. Always, always, always. Do you think that Leon almost overthrew Chris as the face of Resident Evil because fans just... "liked his character"? NO. IT'S BECAUSE WE WANTED TO FUCK HIM. We wanted him in every hole, in every position, and we didn't care what we had to do to get Capcom to give him to us. The only reason why Chris was never dethroned was because the gays circled the wagons around him with RE5's release.

However.

Reader fics and self-inserts are a very new and recent phenomenon in fandom spaces. Even as recently as the mid-2010s, this was something unheard of. Fandom OCs were not okay. If you had a fandom OC, or if the fandom even suspected that you were self-inserting in any way, you got publicly shamed and sometimes even exiled from fandom spaces.

But there was one big, hypocritical problem with that mindset.

If you can't already see where this is going, let me help.

This is the reason why Aeon vs Cleon got as toxic and volatile as it was, back in the day.

Oh, yes. Fans would pick which of the two women they identified with more, and that ship became their vehicle for Leon smut. So, now, it wasn't just a ship. Now, it was personal -- because fans were using Ada or Claire to self-insert in a socially acceptable way. So, if someone rejected Cleon, and you were Team Cleon, chances are, you took that as someone saying "You're not good enough for Leon. You don't deserve him." -- even if you didn't consciously realize that that's what you were doing or how you were perceiving things.

Back in the days of LiveJournal, you found so many fics of just blatant OOC shit, because it wasn't really about Claire or Ada as characters. It never really was. Ada and Claire were just a means to the end goal that was Leon's cock.

So, if nothing else, modern-day fandom is a lot more honest.

Personally? I'll never be interested in reader fics because of how taboo it was for literally my entire life -- I will always see it as cringe, and I will always question that person's grasp on the line between fiction and reality, even though I know consciously that that's not fair for me to do, and that author isn't doing anything that I wasn't thinking about at their age. But prejudices gonna prejudice.

But I'm fucking stoked that I can talk openly about Leon's cock these days, and I don't have to filter it through some fucking ship that I don't care about. I can just sit here and say to you guys -- hey. I think Leon's into edging, and he secretly wants someone to make him beg, but he's too much of a control freak to allow it, so he just makes his partner beg instead. And no one fucking gives a shit!

It's so freeing. I'm so happy.

[cyberexo]

FAR, FAR AWAY | Kim Minseok x Fem Reader

"his eyes sparkled as though god had taken a constellation of stars and placed them within his beautiful orbs"

you can also find this fan-fiction on wattpad under the username @mrkswrld

word count: 573

･ﾟ2

You let a rope of profanities escape your mouth as you dragged the heavy sack of garden goods to the back door of your home that was in the middle of nowhere, arms sore and it hasn't even been a full minute before you started to think your life over.

Maybe if I stayed in that filthy city, I would've had someone do this for me, you thought to yourself. However, you quickly pushed that thought away before all those shitty memories from a couple of years ago flooded your mind. But to your dismay, and the many other times before this, you let them cloud through the crevices of your brain.

Highschool was the shittiest & most fucked up invention to ever "grace" mankind, nothing about it was graceful. Everyone was so dramatic, rude, stupid, and smelt weird. You'd say it was all puberty but you're convinced 98% of the people you went to school with were still like that. Even if your life was on the line you wouldn't be able to come up with one good thing about them. You tried so hard over the past couple of years to forget, to forget how they treated you, waited for you at every corner to harass you. Everyday was a nightmare, and you'll never know why, but you always found the strength to get off your ass in the morning and do it all over again.

Until you didn't, or couldn't...

Out of all of those shitheads there is only one that'll always wear a halo in your mind, Kim Minseok. He was a sweetheart, you were only lab partners, and although you barely talked, you were always so fond of him. He saw how people treated you, like absolute shit, but every morning when you're walking down the halls to get to home room, you'd see him & he would acknowledge you with the cutest smile. That alone kept you going through the day.

Until one day during your last year in that hell hole you decided to just go, go anywhere but that place. Fuck the students, fuck the teachers, fuck getting good grades, and fuck graduating.

You were getting really sick and tired of seeing nothing but a loser in the mirror, sick of all the noise, all the demands and responsibilities you didn't ask for. You could've just ended your own life, you've thought about it before.. why not do it? but you didn't, you wanted full control of your life and ending yourself wasn't the way to go about it, the thought of disappearing forever into the ground and being forgotten about wasn't satisfying enough, it felt peaceful in some ways but it still felt like something would be missing, as if even if you were dead, your subconscious wouldn't be and you'd lay in the ground regretting your decision for eternity.

Plus, you didn't want to ditch Minseok in this horrid world alone. You sounded crazy, you two barely even talked to one another, who're you kidding, he probably only ever smiled at you out of pity but who cares ?! he was adorable.

Finally you took a deep breath, picturing a mini you in your brain pushing all of these thoughts to the back of your overloaded mind, looked down at the sack of foods and groaned as you picked it up with the little strength you had and rushed through the grass to the back door.

chapter 3

[kyrodo]

People will either highlight your weaknesses or highlight your strengths. Sometimes a healthy balance of both or they'll be tasteful about what they highlight and what they avoid. And you couldn't be any further than what I wanted. I know I wasn't sharing the best parts of myself but what you choose to do with it is ultimately your choice. If I could think up a criteria for what I want out of a friend, it is the absolute opposite of you.

The Internet is a crazy place, but if you only look at surface level shit, if you can't actually connect the dots yourself, if you can't figure people out enough to realize who's beneath it all to realize who's bad or who's just sus, you can't be my friend. If you can't properly sort what is actually good and evil then you are fucking done. If you always treat every negative reaction to you like self validation I will cut you the fuck out of my life.

If I fell under the wrong description, it's you that needs fixing not me. If you can't tell the difference between someone going through depression and a common crook you are in for a fucking treat. I can't deal with stupid. You could use a basic class in psychology cause holy shit are you always off.

I can see some degree of had you in the first half, up to a point. And then the rest is pure spite, cause you clearly didn't actually give a shit who I was. You never even took the first step.

I don't often see other people going after someone explosively emotional and trying to ruin their fucking life. If this is what you're all about, I don't want to be part of your fucking family. I used to muse so heavily over my flaws, but for all the sus I seemed the one making all the wrong calls was you the entire time. I don't fucking care how I looked to you, you didn't fucking try. You always take every alternative route to figure me out without taking the right path to do so. My front door was wide open, and you still took the fucking window.

This is how you meet people? This is how you de escalate a situation? Is this the "rabbit hole" I was supposed to go through? A breach of trust and good faith at every possible opportunity? What the fuck do you do when you play people up so hard only to have to tell everyone you made a mistake later. Or is this just your usual bullshit.

I made myself look like an easy target, but you couldn't have been any more wrong. I chose not to let Red know I was being hacked so I could take my sweet ass time picking you apart exactly where you thought I would be. I will never get over how desperate you fucking were trying to improvise hostility at me from the safety of my own bedroom. You want to know where I live so bad why don't you just stick to reading my own fucking bio.

I used to complain so much about how ass it was having to move to Utah, and there you guys are going "yup he's exactly where he said he was" like a total fucking retard. You're so afraid to admit all the shit I said was true that instead of admitting it you pretend you found it out yourself. Well spite is two way fucking street. Pretending seems to be the only thing you're ever good at.

At least some people try to communicate properly. I used to think giving you these opportunities to talk directly to me by reaching out would change something. Clearly I was fucking wrong. And you had the fucking nerve to call me a mute even though I knew exactly what would happen if I did, and you proved me right.

I was right about a lot of shit if you really think about it. You see the entire world around me, even the fact I worked at peloton and you still treated it as fiction, subtexting "liar liar". I seem to have fucking missed something. Why even bother trying to hack me when there were only so many peloton warehouses in utah. All you needed was Fucking yellow pages to find me. What part of I don't need to fucking hide from you do you not fucking understand?

And if referencing oomph songs is enough to ring the wrong bells then you were born on the wrong fucking planet. How many times did we hide song titles in our tweets, and there you are pretending you never have a hand in anything as always. Now I could go ahead and bring up how my song tastes developed watching Sonic The Swordsman from sttwebs on newgrounds, but I know for a fact you never take anything I say seriously. Your level of negligence is fucking legendary.

I was always upfront about the worst sides of myself even the art I look at but you are so determined to go the extra mile trying to tack on extra shit that you fail to even recognize that. I was pessimistic, I was self destructive, I was digging every little flaw about myself and putting it on broadcast, and somehow that wasn't enough for you. I don't recall hiding fuck all about myself least of all anything negative, but somehow that doesn't satisfy you? What the actual fuck do you want from me?

Let's give Luke a round of a applause. He's your bff, not mine. I don't need pieces of shit in my life. Imagine matching someone's negative energy but lacking anything justifiable to attack. So you start making shit up or connecting the wrong dots. I had the high ground here at every level, the only thing I didn't have here was numbers. I guess numbers aren't always right.

Now I don't know how to distinguish between what you actually thought I was and what was just extra shitty subtext but I do feel it was kept vague deliberately just to see if you could dig something up that I hadn't yet. And honestly I shouldn't have to distinguish anything in the first place. And there's nothing I hate more now than people being vague with me to decide what they do depending on how I react. I hate being used and taken advantage of. I hate being manipulated constantly. And you have a full picture of both my online and offline self now and none of it lines up with what you made me out to be.

It's really hard to befriend someone with a fucking agenda. And I suppose I had mine but I was quite a bit more transparent about it than you were, even despite all the fa/social media counter stalking antics I was doing. And here's the thing, I wanted love, I wanted friends, even my "bad" intentions were good. I approached it in a very stupid ass way. But had things proceeded somehow even after pressing all your buttons, things would have gone well. The moment we start talking vocally about everything things would have gone well. We could have smoothed out all the rough edges and maybe even the stalking antics would have stopped ideally. What would have happened was wishy washy and would have made me happier than it might have made you, but it was not malicious. You can hate me all you want but you cannot deny that I had my reasons and they were not evil. I've been transparent quite a bit back then even when I was obfuscating it with poetry and lyrics. My subtext was sometimes far off in ways only I understood, but when I wanted you to know something, I at least put some effort into making it easy enough to infer.

Even when I was waving around commission money after you kept shouting about how you were saving up to move out, while it might not have been the right way to react to it, I was trying to help you. I was trying to help you without straight up giving away money since we ourselves were getting late notices on our rent. Red overdrafted his share of times while we were interacting and he told me to hold onto an amount for emergencies. Me and Red even though our accounts are separate share our money since our collective survival depends on it. So something small like getting a commission I could do and get away with without much question. Anything bigger and Red would be on my ass and even my mom.

Even if I was kinda throwing pennies at you I thought it would be enough to be considered helpful without doing anything overboard. I can't and I shouldn't bribe my way into somebody's life. But when I had people spying on me 24/7 from my phone and computer I was going to do anything to get it to stop. Because I was being threatened. Because I still had feelings and they weren't manageable enough to make common sense decisions like leave you the fuck alone. Some level of pity as well. But predatory is not the word I would describe someone I am driving into a corner and activating fight or flight instincts on through means most people don't have to deal with for their entire fucking lives.

But the biggest thing to consider is how many times Ron would post about the pwyw commission to save to move in a single day. Given how much we were subtexting each other I was trying to figure out what he wanted. Suggesting peloton was self serving but it would have been a surefire way for you to get what you wanted and a way I could potentially move over given we had warehouses across the country. I thought we could easily transfer the same way we transferred from socal to norcal or norcal to utah, except I'd have friends again. I'm not saying it was a great idea but it was a very simple one. It almost seemed like a practical future. And the more I thought about it the more I hoped it would actually happen. Everywhere is cheaper than California. We could have made it our last stop peloton wise. We didn't have any social reasons to stay in Utah. That is partly why I was trying so hard. The world was dark and you were literally the light at the end of the tunnel for me, but it was all a fucking lie.

I only get a few hours at most with Red before he's asleep for the day after work and he doesn't really do anything fun with me. He likes coding or projects, he doesn't want to play anything even remotely progress heavy including borderlands. But most people would consider our relationship healthy.

Mine with you relied on stalking, subtexting, and a bunch of conditional shit like money, so yes I recognize it was unhealthy. And it is a good thing one way or another we stopped.

The reason I canon'd Mae so hard is not just cause you reminded me of Gregg, it's because I wanted to go anywhere else than mormonville. And I was burning bridges with California too. I was being quite literal about wanting a new home, but more to be nearby than anything.

I listened to Echo so many times, and the words meant a lot to me. It reflected my mental state and it reflected my needs. Ironically my solution ended up being Marcus instead of you. The pyramid head I actually know and get along with.

[convictsinterim]

Jason is a cycle breaker, in that he is not a "Good" one but he is cognizant of it and also someone who does direct action about it. Not only is he someone actively aware of the cyclical and never-ending pileup of bodies in the attempts to uphold the emotionally invested rule of one man—he confronts the selfishness surrounding that decision and how it's affected so many people, especially him personally.

Dick does recognize some of the tells of manipulation and of imbalance in his relationship with Bruce, but he does not connect the physical abuse/domestic abuse he sees as a cop in Blüdhaven to the physical abuse Bruce doles out to him. He doesn't connect that he's being emotionally abused, the psychological stranglehold Bruce has on him, the paranoia that spawns out of that.

Bruce never even has to be around for Dick to be burdened by what his father thinks of him—the pater familias. Jason, though? Jason stepped out of that cage and is dancing outside of it. The shackles that bind Dick have always been unlocked. All Dick has to do is step outside the cage. It's why Jason triggered Dick so much in New Earth and why Dick was so antagonistic towards him, mean and even seemingly apathetic.

Seeing someone freely express their loud and turbulent displeasure, list their grievances and not back down to bury the hatchet, gnash their teeth and demand something more and something better incenses someone like Dick. Dick has argued, he has fought, he has yelled, but of it all and at the end of the day he will still go back to Bruce. Jason though? He cannot lie down. He will bite the hand that beats every single time, and strike at the eyes that watch. Jason can forgive, he can move on—it's literally all he wanted to do—but he couldn't without proper answers and he couldn't just 'move on' when Bruce continued making the same mistake ad nauseam with no change. Jason cannot be complacent.

Additionally, from Dick and Jason's shared kinship, Jason can get at the CORE of why Dick is so complacent, where other's maybe cannot. Jason knows it because Dick doesn't want to lose yet another parent. Jason would know, because he's lost all fucking four of his. One after the other, after the other, after the other. Dick holds onto things with his teeth, too, after all.

Dick is someone suffocated under the black tar Bruce has buried him into. Jason crawled out of the tar. He's still poisoned, but he's making it work!

This is why forcing Dick to interact more with Jason is like catnip to me xD

Jason's own cognizance and awareness as a whole is why crashing Jason into a character like Dick, someone great at self-delusion, is literally the most interesting thing you could do relationship wise—especially romantically.

Jason poses such a narrative and internal challenge for characters, he makes character arcs essentially requisite! He makes plots spin by stepping onto center stage. That is how a long term in-character Jason works. He forces change in some capacity, he addresses complacence. (It's why DC wasn't able to keep him up and full strength, he got diluted into… puddle sludge, mostly through Prime Earth and less so through Daniels and Morrison. Because even with Morrison, Jason still had more fucking teeth.)

Needless to say, transformative fiction also disrupts the status quo so push it in that direction of transformation—of change! I love challenging characters, ESPECIALLY basket-cases, and making them actually change or evolve as people and exploring them in ways that otherwise wouldn't ever get published.

Jason really does far more for Dick's character than Dick does for Jason's, when speaking from a developmental point of view. Speaking from a personal view, I do not want Dick to die beholden to the Batman and his black hole ego that leeches Dicks sanity away from him at every turn.

What Dick offers to Jason is this: loyalty once earned, respect, trust, and genuine unconditional love. A chance to be accepted by someone he really respects and looked up to, a chance to help someone help themself, a chance to foundationally have a profound effect on someone and that effect be positive!

What Jason offers to Dick is this: everything aforementioned, and freedom. Genuine freedom, under no pretenses or expectations that need to be met. There's no 'failing' to meet a quota, there's no forcing Dick into roles he doesn't want but will take anyway because Dick cannot easily say no. And great exposure therapy to help Dick stop pathologizing/moralizing every single one of his actions against a nonexistent jury filled with Batmen.

And so I offer to you, an incredibly complicated and interesting endeavour with many conquests!

actually can any dickjay shippers explain to me what the appeal is. i want to understand your vision please

[icedcaramelcake]

Overanalyzing hollow knight characters episode 1: Hornet

Hi I don't know how to write intros but I've had SO MANY THOUGHTS about this game for the longest time and with the encouragement of my friend I'm here to dump them on this wonderful website! This is the first of hopefully multiple posts in this style with hopefully different characters and hopefully different games or shows I enjoy.

DISCLAIMER(s)!!

1. There will (obviously) be spoilers in this, if you haven't at least watched a summary and/or don't want to be spoiled I highly recommend clicking off and coming back later when you're up to date!

2. English is not my first language and I am slightly dyslexic AND I tend to ramble so I'm sorry if any of that shines through, I'll do my best to reread and cut out unnecessary parts but some might slip through so I apologize in advance.

3. I tend to read into characters wayyy too much, especially characters I like, so some of this might tread into headcanon territory even though I'll have a headcanon section at the bottom for that. Also I consume way too much fan media so that might skew my view on things too.

And last but not least 4. REMEMBER this is 100% my opinion, not law. This is just how I interpreted the character's overall arc and it's by no means canon, I'm just sharing my silly little thoughts on silly little fictional pixels on my screen, I'd love to hear what you think or if you want to add onto anything I said!

With all that out of the way let's start with probably my favorite character in this entire game, Hornet! <3

When I first got introduced to Hollow Knight it was through some challenge videos I believe, I heard of the game before but it didn't seem like something I would be interested in (spoiler alert I was wrong). As I kept diving down the rabbit hole I found myself getting more and more fascinated with the lore and especially with Hornet but it wasn't until my own playthrough that I crowned her as my favorite.

On the surface Hornet already has a lot of traits I really enjoy in a character. She can be sassy (as shown in the Silksong trailers which fdjhkfdjhksjkfd yes), she can be cold but she can also show kindness and gentleness every now and then.

Being the daughter of the Pale King but not ever receiving royal treatment from the bugs of Hallownest, having Deepnest's queen as her mother but being forced to leave her home due to the infection and never having a parental figure besides...Midwife...if you can count her as "motherly", all these shaped her into a powerful, agile but most of all determined bug that wants to get rid of the Radiance for good even though she's aware she doesn't have the means for it.

Her meeting the player character (who I'll call little knight for the rest of this post for the sake of simplicity + it's cute) is completely by chance, might be her first chance at "recruiting" a vessel in years, she has no way of knowing if she'll ever have this chance again. This might be her only shot at protecting the kingdom and her home, uncovering its secrets, basically fulfilling her life's goal! What will she do??? Befriend it, help it and defeat the Radiance with the power of friendship????????

Of course not, you've played this game you know exactly what happened.

Hornet attacks the little knight with little to no hesitation with OBVIOUS intent to kill (see: the dead vessel that's literally in the arena) despite this being a massive risk. She's dedicated, she knows that if the vessel is too weak nothing will work, she puts her desire to quickly solve the problem behind her and does what she thinks is best for the kingdom, trying to see if the vessel is strong enough to not only replace the Hollow Knight, but maybe even destroy the infection. She's been at this for so long, she has probably killed or seen so many other vessels getting killed and she knows they're not infinite but she still takes the risk and thinks of a farther future.

As the game progresses, her attitude slowly changes. While she never outright states this as far as I know, she doesn't treat the little knight as her sibling, downright pitying it for its heritage. But I think she starts to sympathize for it. They have the same goal, and while Hornet maybe thought she would be the one to save Hallownest, she sees why that would never happen. So she starts to guide the knight, helping where she can in her own distant way.

She starts being more open, less formal and while she never fully lets her walls down, her dreamnail dialogue from right before the true ending Hollow Knight fight show her being hopeful. She doesn't outright say it but I know for a fact (I'm speculating) that no matter what would happen she would accept her fight with the infection being over, she would be thankful for the little knight and dare I say proud (let me have this it was the only thing I could think of while watching the true ending cutscene ueueueueue).

Besides the in game playable lore I wanna touch on something I noticed while staring at her wiki for the 7381297th time today, and that is how Hornet has a piece of every "region" with her (at least mentally) if you squint. This is rllllllly iffy but I thought it was poetic and this is mY POST AND I GET TO WRITE WHAT I WANT DAMMIT.

Anyway

She has a piece of deepnest, kingdom's edge, city of tears and crossroads + greenpath + queen's gardens through Herrah (her mother), Vespa (who she was trained by), the Pale King (her father) and the White Lady who isn't explicitly said to have met Hornet but she knew of her existence and of the Pale King's... liaison for lack of a better word. I'd like to think she was part of Hornet's childhood if only for a little bit because i think it's cute and it has no lore evidence besides something Team Cherry said on their kickstarter

Anyway this is getting dangerously close to headcanon territory so I should probably summarize all this lmao.

Overall, Hornet relies on herself. She's independent, she's motivated, she's strong, she's everything you'd expect from a perfect princess. But she's also sassy, she takes risks, she has growth and passion and wants to help and do her part. I love her sm. She is an ice princess but the ice can help protect small critters from the harsh winds of winter.

FROM HERE ON OUT I'LL START RANTING ABOUT MY HCS SO IF YOU DON'T CARE ABT THEM TY FOR READING THIS FAR ILY HAVE A GREAT DAY <3

This. This entire video was the reason I wanted to make this. GOD. G O D. I KNOW IT HAS NO WAY OF BEING CANON BUT I ADORE IT???

Most of my hcs are gonna stem from this video so yeah watch it and like it and give it all the love it deserves.

I'd like to think that the Hollow Knight was some of the only family she had, even if it was only for a brief period of time. I'd like to think that one of the main reasons she wanted to get rid of the infection early on was to save her big brother. But as she grew up she realized that wouldn't be possible anymore. I think that was her tipping point, the thing that made her into the Hornet we know today.

I'd like to think that at the start she saw the vessels as pieces of her, potential siblings that could help her get her family back, that they could all be one big family. She loses that hope quickly until the little knight comes along. As she watches it walk around, discover the world with one goal in mind, she can't help but see herself when she was younger. She knows it won't make it out of this alive no matter what it does but she isn't sad. She knows this is what is supposed to be done. She knows that they'll be free of their cursed life once the fight is over. That doesn't mean she wants that. She tries to deny it but it can get lonely.

In the sealed sibling ending I'd like to think she feels guilty for becoming a dreamer but she knows she chose this path and she only hopes her mother can forgive her for it.

In the embrace the void ending when she readies her nail to fight the Hollow Knight I'd like to think some part of her is happy that it's alive, but she knows it's not the same as it was before.

I have more but I've been typing for an hour and my brain hurts and I can't think of them rn but I hope you enjoyed reading this! Lmk if you have any other ideas and I'll see you again when I have too much time on my hands<3